


"Time for a story" Drabble Series

by smkkbert



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, Family Fluff, Marriage, Near Future
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2018-03-29 21:58:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 295
Words: 1,059,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3912157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smkkbert/pseuds/smkkbert
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This fic shows Olicity and their life as a (married) couple with family. Although Olicity (and their kids) are the protagonists, other characters of Arrow and Flash make appearances.</p><p>It started as a drabble series, but developed more and more into a full domectic AU. Although some chapters are still drabble-like, there are longer storylines by now. (All chapters are also available on Tumblr)</p><p>The rating as "explicit" is only because of a few drabbles that contain smut, but those are rather rare.<br/>Most of the drabbles are fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wedding Vows

„And now it is time for you to say your wedding vows.”

Oliver turned around to face the few people they had decided to invite to this special moment. When they had finally agreed to get married, they had right away concurred on the fact that it would be a small wedding with only their closest family and friends there.

When Oliver looked to the faces of their loved ones – Donna Smoak, Roy and Thea, Diggle and Lyla with Baby Sara in her lap and finally Laurel – he couldn’t help but smile. Even though it was a small ceremony, it was still perfect because finally his dream of marrying the one woman he had loved for so long came true. And he still couldn’t really believe it. It felt so unreal even if right.

“When we decided to get married,” he started smiling, “I suggested that we should write our own wedding vows because, let’s be honest, we don’t lead normal lives, so we need unique vows. Then Felicity” – he glanced to where she stood in her long white dress beside him – “had an even better idea. So we decided that we were gonna write five promises we want to hear from each other.”

With that short explanation he turned back to Felicity, who was reaching behind her where she had put a piece of paper that she then hold out to him. He took it, his fingers slightly trembling when he unfolded it.

“Okay, here we go,” he began before starting to read out whatever she had written down for him to promise her. “Felicity, I promise to always see my partner in you. To always see my best friend in you. To always see the love of my life in you. To always see the most passionate lover in you.”

He looked up at Felicity, whose face suddenly turned a dark color of red. She was staring at him in shock. It was obvious that she hadn’t known he was going to say those words, and it was even more obvious that she was beyond embarrassed by them.

“It says here,” Oliver hurried to say while Felicity ripped the paper from his hands and read the foreign lines he had just read out loud. He saw her eyes fly over those words again and again before throwing an angry look at his sister.

Thea just laughed and held up her hands in innocence. “Come on, everyone here walked in on the two of you having sex at least once. And we’ve lived together for a while. I heard you. It had to be said.”

While everyone else joined in his little sister’s laugh, Oliver just rolled his eyes before looking back at Felicity whose face was even redder than seconds before. She gave the paper back to him. Oliver took it, smiling at her in reassurance to apologize for his sister. Although he had to admit that Thea may have a point in this. They’ve had a lot of sex in a lot of places. And there had been a lot of people walking in on them…

Anyways, Oliver continued, “I promise to never lie to you. I promise to keep you safe from kangaroos in case they ever try to take over the world.” – Again there was laughter – “I promise to always accept your pregnant-like carvings for mint chocolate chip ice cream even if you’re not pregnant. And I promise to kiss you breathless whenever I feel I have to end your babbling.”

He smiled when he pressed a kiss to the letter, read it once again in silence and folded it before he put it in the inside of his blazer. Breathing in deeply, he gave her a different piece of paper that she took in her hands and unfolded without taking her eyes off of him. He smiled at her brightly.

“Oliver,” she began, tears already forming in her eyes, “I promise to love you even when you put on what I call ‘your angry face’. I promise to balance your silence with all my sweet babbling. I promise to hold you tightly and stroke your hair lovingly whenever you have a nightmare or even just feel the need of it. I promise to always be the light your life. And I promise to-”

She stops, her gaze lingering over those last words he had written down. Then she lifted her eyes from the lines and looked up at him, already blushing again. Oliver couldn’t help the amused smile spreading all over his face. When he had written that last promise, he had known that she was going to blush and even the thought of it had made him smile.

“I’m not going to read that out,” she whispered, shaking her head slightly.

“But you have to,” Oliver grinned. “It was your idea. Remember?”

Felicity glanced at their friends and her mother.

“Lyla, I think you should cover Sara’s ears,” she said and waited until Lyla did so before she continued, “And I promise to pull your head out of your ass whenever it is stuck there because of your unbelievable stubbornness and then kick your ass really hard until sanity is finally getting into your brain again.”

For a moment nobody said a word. Felicity was grinning at Oliver although the red color was still all over her face. Oliver just mirrored that grin filled with so much love it almost made Felicity cry.

She knew why he had chosen that promise. The fact that Oliver usually refused to pull his head out of his ass had been the reason it had taken so long for the two of them to finally be together in the first place.

It was Thea – again – who was the first one to reply to that last promise Felicity was kind of forced to give Oliver.

“That is a good promise,” she shouted, clapping her hands. “Who’s going to bring sanity to my brother if it isn’t wifey?”

Everyone joined in her laughter and even Felicity felt herself relax although she just said those gross words on her wedding day.

Every embarrassment was forgotten when they were finally declared husband and wife, and Oliver didn’t even wait till the sentence was ended before closing the distance and pressing his lips to Felicity’s in a passionate kiss.

They both knew they would definitely keep those promises.


	2. Sleepless nights

Usually he was the one with trouble sleeping. Since he had come back from the island he often found himself pacing around the house at night, maybe working all his energy off on the salmon ladder, hoping he would just pass out later. 

Most of it changed when he had met Felicity. He still wasn’t sleeping a lot, though. To be honest, the first nights with his lovely blonde IT-girl by his side he didn’t even dare to close his eyes, afraid she might disappear because it had all been a dream, or even worse, it was all true and someone would come and take her from him. So he had just stayed in bed and had watched her sleep soundly. It had warmed his heart, and when he had finally - after maybe two months of spending nights together - realized that she was really here and nobody would ever take her away on his watch, he even started sleeping more.

Within those last months their nightly habits again had started to change. They still settled in bed together after long nights in the Arrow-cave, but latley they just lay there, snuggled up to each other without sleeping. It turned out the eighth month of pregnancy was the one where sleep sounded like a foreign word to Felicity. And Oliver just couldn’t sleep, knowing his wife wasn’t sleeping.

And because of that Oliver was more than surprised that, when he woke up this night with his head in the pillow and turned around, reaching around to pull Felicity closer to him, she just wasn’t there. He sat up immediately, looking around to find that she wasn’t in the room and not even in the connected bathroom.

He hurried to jump out of bed and leave the room, almost running through the corridor to the stairs. He ran down always taking two steps a time. As soon as he saw the light from the livingroom, he went in that direction and silently took a look in the room where Felicity was sitting crosslegged on the couch, her tablet in her lap and chewing on her bottom lip. She wore one of his shirts and her hair was up in a high ponytail like it ususally was.

Oliver took a deep breath and told his heart to stop racing in his chest. Felicity was here. She was okay. Everything was okay.  
Well, everyting but the fact that she had left their bed without him realizing.

He stayed where he was, leaning his body in the doorframe, and watched her while she was so deep in her thoughts that she didn’t even sense his appearance like she normaly did.

Although they’ve been married for almost a year now and together for almost two, he still couldn’t get tired to watch her. Felicity was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, and especially since she had become pregnant, he was just so lost in his love to her that is amost seemed ridiculous.

Almost. Not quite.

* * *

 

One hundred seventy-four. One hundred seventy-…

Felicity rolled on her back, letting her fingers rub over her swollen belly. When she had learned that she was pregnant, she had been beyond happy, and she still was of course. What could there be better than a baby with Oliver Queen - a wonderful man, an even more amazing husband and a really heroic vigilante? Nothing!

Unfortunately pregnany seemed to mess up every routine their life had ever had. First there had been a long time of morning sickness which had actually lasted all day, so Felicity hadn't even been able to go to the Arrow-cave anymore because she used to kneel on the bathroom floor, waiting for the next attack of nausea to come up. Then her hormones had taken control over her body which had made her cry a lot and had her mad angry even more. Really bad days had made her throw around plates and other things. And now sleep just didn’t seem to come for her. 

First it wasn’t really easy to find any comfortable position for her. Then the baby seemed to be a nighthawk. While there was rarely movement in her belly during the day their baby started kicking like crazy as soon as Felicity lay down to sleep. And finally all the energy she had missed during those first months of pregnancy had started to catch up on her.

She glanced at Oliver, who was sleeping beside her. Felicity reached out to stroke over his hair like she had promised him on their wedding day, but considering that he barely had slept since her sleeping problems had occured, she just pulled her fingers back.

Okay, she had given sleep a chance. It was time for her to do something more useful than lying here where she might actually end up waking Oliver. Silently she slipped out of bed and left the bedroom only to walk around the house before finally sitting down on the couch with her tablet in her lap.

The last nights she had stayed up together with Oliver they had started to discuss baby names. It turned out they had really different opinions on what baby names were acceptable.  
And it had also turned out that their biggest problem was to find a name for a girl because unfortunately Felicity suggested every name to also be the name of one of Oliver’s ex-lovers which made it impossible for them to find a name. Actually, Felicity had declared that it would be better for them to have a boy because even if she had sex with some guys, it wouldn’t lead them to cross most of the acceptable names from their list.

She opened said list on her tablet and took a look at the names.  
They had agreed that if their baby turned out to be a boy, they would name him Benjamin Thomas Queen. Felicity had right away stated that she was all in for Thomas. Oliver himself had stated that he’d like Thomas as a middle name, but didn’t want it as a first name. She remembered him saying something like the baby should have his own name to not get his identy confused over the whole name thing. Felicity had been half asleep at that time, so she couldn’t really say that she knew what he had meant.  
But it didn’t really matter because Benjamin Thomas Queen sounded just perfect to her.

The list for girl names still held some names.  
Oliver's favorites were Chloe, Scarlett and Eveyln.  
Felicity prefered Emma, Maya and Quinn.

Sighing, she opened the browser to google those names Oliver had picked. She really tried to convince herself that she could love those names. She liked them, but she didn’t really love them, and she wouldn’t give her daughter a name she didn’t truely love.

While she scrolled to some pages she felt a shiver run through her body, followed by goosebumps that spread all over her skin. She bit her tongue and tried not to smile. She knew Oliver was watching her. The shiver and the goosebumps were the typical sign for it. She just didn’t want him to know that she knew because he had told her once how much he loved to just silently watch her and-

“Oliver, I think I found the perfect name!” she suddenly said or more likely screeched, reaching her hand out for him to take and sit beside her which he did immediately. “Here. Look at that name! It is perfect.”

Oliver didn’t answer, and when she finally managed to look away from the name she just found and loved, she saw him staring at her with a loving smile on his face.

“How long did you know I was standing there?” he asked.

“Not that long. A few minutes maybe. I don’t know. Doesn’t matter. You have to look at this babyname,” she repeated.

The name was beyond perfect. How come she hadn’t found it sooner? They could have spared themselves long discussions…

“No kissing,” Felicity said, shaking her head slightly when he leaned towards her. She took his chin in her hand and turned his head to look at the name. “Say it is perfect. It is perfect. It is a normal name, not too extraordinary. And it is the perfect mix of Emma and Evelyn although the pronounciation is a little different and- doesn't matter! It combines a name I like with one you picked. Besides, even the sound of it is so magical that I really believe it will-”

Oliver framed her face with his hands and pressed his lips to hers in a long and deep kiss - just like he had promised on their wedding day.

“It is perfect,” he then agreed, kissing his wife again while moving her into his lap and letting his hands run over her belly to feel the baby’s kicking. “Any idea about a middle name?”

Felicity deleted all the names on their list and replaced it with the new one. When she leaned her back to his chest and lay her hands on his that still stroked over where the baby was kicking, she shook her head.

“You?” she asked, turning her head and kissing the corner of his mouth.

“How would you like Grace?”

“Agreed,” she said, writing the name down and saving the changes she had made on that list. “How did it take us so long to even find a first name?”

“I don’t know,” Oliver sighed and kissed her shoulder. “But at least now it’s perfect.”

He turned her in his lap, so he could slide one arm around her waist, the other unter her knees and then lowered his lips to her belly.

“Hey, Baby,” he whispered softly. “Mommy and I just agreed on naming you Emmeline Grace Queen if you are a girl. How about a little sign of approval?”

Even before he put his hand on Felicity’s stomach she could feel the baby kicking.

“I take that as approval,” he stated when the baby did it again, and then he kissed Felicity softly. “Emmeline Grace Queen will be a very loved baby, won’t she?”

“It might still be a boy,” Felicity answered, sliding her arms around his neck. “But boy or girl, our baby will be very loved.”

“Yes, she will” Oliver grinned, causing Felicity to roll her eyes, laughing.

God, she loved this man!


	3. Pregnancy test party

Thea was sitting cross-legged on the comfortable couch in her brother’s house, holding her newborn niece safely in her arms while she was sleeping. Ever since little Emmeline had been born a week ago, Thea had spent more time here than in her penthouse, enjoying every second she got to take care of that sweet baby that had, unfortunately for her parents, turned out to be a persistend squaller.

“You know what, little Emmy?” she asked and pulled the baby closer to her face, so she could place a soft kiss on the little girl’s forehead. “While your mommy is taking the shower she needs so much since you refuse to stay alone in the room for more than two minutes, I think we could use that time, so I can tell you about how I got to know you would join us.”

* * *

 

She was sitting on her bed, bored by the magazine she had put in her lap to read for what seemed like the thousandth time. 

When she read the name on the display of her ringing cell, she threw away the magazine, lying down on her stomach, and happily smiled about the much needed distraction.

“Hey, sis,” she almost sang. “You haven’t been calling in a week. I was actually starting to think you didn’t like me anymore. We have barely spent time with each other those last weeks.”

She heard Felicity laughing, but Thea could also hear the nervousness in that short laughter. Felicity had become a really good friend even before she had started dating Oliver, who had needed way too long to finally start letting his feelings for Felicity show. Neither the long talks she had had to her brother about Felicity, nor seeing her with someone else had really changed his mind about it. He had stayed with this head up in his ass like Felicity used to say and refused to admit that he wanted to be with her more than anything. Felicity literally had to force him so be with her. But that was a story for a different day.

“Sorry,” Felicity finally said. “I was a little… busy those last days and didn’t really feel like I wanted company. There was too much in my head, and I needed to get through that on my own before sharing.”

“What happened? First real fight with my brother? I can promise you that whatever happened you were the one who was right about it.”

It was a fact that they fought a lot, but mainly over Arrow related things that they mostly solved in a few hours. In the few months they had been married there had been no real fight that could be described as a typical fight between married people.

Felicity laughed. And again there was a nervousness in her voice that started to infect Thea. She knew that her sister in law often felt insecure around other people, but that had mostly passed in the time she had spent with Thea.

“Come on, Felicity,” Thea encouraged her. “Tell me what’s going on.”

“I think that I’m pregnant.”

“What?!” Thea screached, getting up on her knees and sitting back on her feet. She already felt the excitement about the consequences of that. A baby was what could make everything perfect. “How far along are you? And what’s it gonna be? A boy or a girl? And does Ollie already know? What did he say? I mean have you actually been trying to have a baby because I really thought Ollie would never let that happen with your night job and-”

“Wow, turns out I’m not the only one who can babble,” Felicity interrupted and sighed when Thea turned silent. “So to make it short, I’m not really sure that I’m pregnant, and that is why I need you to come here. We will have a pregnancy test party.”

“A what?”

“A pregnancy test party,” Felicity repeated. “When I was in college, one of my friends thought she might be pregnant. She was scared, so we suggested that we would all take a pregnancy test to lower the tension. Everyone went to one of the toilets and peed on a stick. Then we all met in her room and waited until the time was up and looked on our sticks at the same time. It was… funny... I think.”

“When do you want me to come over?”

“How about now? Lyla will be here, too. I asked Laurel, but she needs to work. So it’s gonna be the three of us.”

“I’m kind of hurt that I’m the third person you asked and not the first, but I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

And so was Lyla.

Just like Felicity had described to her earlier, all of the three women peed on one of the tests, put them on a towel on the small table and made themselves comfortable on the couches while waiting for the time to end.

“So…” Thea finally said, not being able to take the silence any longer. "Was this planned?“

Felicity shook her head, tightening her arms around the pillow and pressing it to her chest. "No. Actually I think this will be a nightmare. Oliver barely let me become a part of his life. I can’t even think what will happen when we will have a baby. I mean… our lives are complicated, and I can’t really see where a baby could take place in that.”

“Well, it works for John and me,” Lyla answered. “Sara is a very loved and well protected child.”

Thea winced slightly when Sara’s name was said. Although she somehow managed to move on with her life, knowing she killed Sara still wasn’t easy for her. But she kept smiling, not wanting to ruin the moment.

“Yes, but John had always been a little more at peace with having a normal life besides the one in the Arrow cave,” Felicity thought out loud.

“I think,” Thea hurried to say, “Ollie will be beyond happy if you are pregnant. Well, I now he had been kind of negative about anyone joining his life. I mean... it took him years to tell me that he is the Arrow, and it took him even longer to let you be part of his life. But he changed. A lot. I think he always dreamed about being a dad and just never really thought he could be with his nighttime job. But he will be a great dad, and he will be happy about it. Overprotective and always worried, but happy.”

Just then the timer started beeping, declaring the end of the waiting time. 

Everyone sat up. Felicity was the only one who was really nervous which was understandable since she was the only one worried about being pregnant.

“So…” Lyla glanced at Felicity. “How do you want to do this?”

“How about everyone takes their stick, and we count to three before looking at them?”

“This is ridiculous!” Thea stated, grapping Felicity’s pregnancy test from the towel and looked at it.

Nobody said a word. She could see Felicity holding her breath while she waited for her to tell her the result. Thea honestly thought about changing the subject just to tease Felicity for not calling her right away, but soon made up her mind. The situation was way to serious for this.

“You are pregnant!” she shouted out, throwing the test back on the towel, and pulled Felicity in for a hug. “You are having a baby! You are making me an aunt. This is… Oh my god!”

Thea could already see it in her head. She would accompany Felicity to every doctor’s appointment. She knew her brother would only drive her crazy, so she could hold her sister’s handy while the ultrasound was taken and be a comofort for her. And then the two of them would go shopping a lot of baby clothes together, and she would take care of the baby whenever Oliver and Felicity needed some time for themselves or needed to head to the foundry. She would be an aunt, totally spoiling the baby.

It took her a while until she realized that her excitement over the baby was not exactly shared by the future mother.

“Hey, Oliver will be happy,” Thea reassured her as soon as she loosened her hold on Felicity.

“But how will we handle this? We have our daytime jobs at QC, and we have our nighttime jobs in the Arrow cave. There is no time for a baby, and we can’t take it to neither of those places.”

“Other people manage to go on jobs and have a family, too,” Lyla said with a smile.

“Yes, and you still have me,” Thea added. “We both know that Ollie is not really happy with me in the Arrow cave. So he probably will be happier when I will watch your child.”

“But I don’t want you to watch our child.”

Thea pulled back, trying not to let the hurt show too much.  
Of course Felicity didn’t want her to watch her baby. She had killed Sara. Felicity wouldn’t let a killer watch her child. She couldn’t really blame Felicity for refusing her any contact to that baby. Altought her sister-in-law had never blamed her for killing Sara, Thea could guess that a baby would change everything. Even if Felicity didn’t mind Thea around herself, she would probaby not trust her with her baby.

“Yeah, I understand that,” she finally said. “I mean I wouldn’t let a killer near my baby, too, so…”

“What?” Felicity asked frowning, clearly not knowing what Thea was talking about.

“Well, because of what I did to Sara I guess…”

“No!” Felicity interrupted her immediately, grabbing Thea's hands and pulling her back to her. “This was not meant like that. It’s not about you. It’s… I don’t want anyone else watching the baby. I want to take care of the baby. But I am needed at the foundry. I don’t want a nanny or anyone. I want to do it myself. You know what I mean?”

Thea nodded, the hurt starting to go away.

“You will find a way,” Lyla said. “You will find a way to do it. John and I did. Oliver and you will, too.”

Thea nodded again, squeezing Felicity’s hands.

“Lyla is right. Just tell him.”

* * *

 

“Well, since you have already met your daddy, I am sure you know how he reacted to that message,” Thea smiled at her niece who had just started to open her eyes, moving her hands in random motions. “I am going to tell you anyway. Your mommy called me the next day and wanted to go shopping for your first clothes because your daddy convinced her that you will be very, very safe in this world. And guess what? You are.”

Thea put Emmeline down on the pillow between on her legs and gently rubbed the baby’s tummy. God, she loved this girl! She would definitely spoil that kid all her life.

“That was a nice story to tell her,” she heard Felicity’s voice come from the stairs where she came down in only a robe. “Oliver uses to tell her stories a lot.”

Felicity walked over to them, resting her forearms on the back rest of the couch and stroking her daughters tummy over Thea's shoulder.

“She’s gorgeous,” Thea whispered.

“When she’s not screaming,” Felicity laughed.

“Want me to stay till Ollie’s back?”

Before Thea could answer, they heard keys, and both turned their heads.

“Speaking of the devil,” Thea sighed when her brother entered the house.

“Give me Emmeline,” Felicity whispered, hurrying around the couch and reaching out for her baby.

“No, don’t give her to her,” Oliver shouted from the corridor, placing his briefcase next to the stairs, and joined the three women in the living room. “She had her all day. Now it’s time for daddy to hold princess Emmeline.”

Before Thea could even blink or roll her eyes over that everlasting fight about who was next to hold the baby, Felicity had grabbed Emmeline from where she was lying on the pillow and had pulled the baby to her chest, closing her arms around the little bundle of joy.

Oliver growled, took off his blazer and loosened his tie before he jumped over the couch to sit between Thea and Felicity, who immediately pulled her daughter closer to herself to make it harder for Oliver to take her away from her.

“You have three minutes,” Oliver stated and took a look at his watch. “And then she is all mine.”

Thea rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help the smile. Yes, the only way Oliver and Felicity didn’t get in a fight about who was allowed to hold Emmeline next was to set a timer and give her from one to the other every three minutes.

It was so sweet.


	4. Snatching the baby, killing the mother - gaining the father's love?

Emmeline was soundly asleep in the crib they had put in the living room since the little girl refused to be alone for too long. Felicity was really lucky that her three week old daughter had chosen this evening to at least fall asleep without being held all the time because Thea was sick and couldn’t come, and Felicity was starving, not having had any time to cook with Emmeline screaming almost all day.

While she waited for the dinner to be ready, she kept staring at the crib, almost expecting her daughter to start crying every second. But it seemed like little Emmeline had fallen asleep deeply for once. Felicity looked up to heaven - or at least to the ceiling - and sent a silent prayer for her to keep sleeping the next hours.

When she saw the lights shining through the window in the kitchen, she hurried to reach the front door before Oliver could open it and call for her like he always did when he came home from work. If the sounds from the kitchen hadn’t woken up the baby, his shouting probably would.

She watched Oliver getting out of the car and grabbing his briefcase before turning around to her with a big smile on his face. When he saw her, standing in the doorframe of their house, he stopped immediately and a worried expression started to show on his face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, hurrying to get to her.

“Nothing,” she answered with a smile on her face that had almost become rare when he came back from work because most evenings she had been that exhausted that even a smile was too much for her.

“Nothing?” Oliver repeated frowning.

Felicity kept smiling, grabbing his tie and pulling him towards her till they were chest to chest, and she could easily get up on her toes and put her arms around his neck. She pressed her lips to his, opening her mouth and sighing quietly when her tongue met his. Oliver slid his arms around her waist to pull her even closer and deepened the kiss.

“You’re right,” he said, nodding as soon as their lips parted, and Felicity pulled back slightly to be able to look at him. “Something is actually really right.”

Again she raised up onto her toes and kissed him shortly.

“Something is really right,” she repeated, taking his hand and pulling him into the house. It was way too cold to stay outside. Besides, she didn’t want the dinner to burn. “Emmeline is lying in her crib, sleeping silently. It is a miracle. I really thought our daughter would never be able to sleep without someone holding her. And since she has already been sleeping for a few hours, I was able to make us the first real dinner since she has been born. Fried chicken with pasta. Almost ready.”

During her talking she had gone to the kitchen while Oliver had put off his jacket, loosened his tie and opened the first two buttons of his dress shirt. Felicity switched off the stove and put the food on the plates, almost dropping them when she turned around to find Oliver sitting on the couch with little Emmeline in his arms.

“Are you insane?” she whispered. “She finally fell asleep by herself and you are just taking her?”

Oliver glanced at her over his shoulder. “Hey, I was longing to hold her all day.”

Felicity sighed, took a bowl from one of the cupboards and put the food from both plates in it before grabbing a fork and joining her husband.

“Just so we’re clear,” she stated while winding some of the spaghetti around the fork and then holding it to Oliver who opened his mouth and let himself be fed by his wife, “if you wake her up, you will take care of her.”

Oliver didn’t answer immediately. Felicity prepared another fork of food for herself and looked up to her husband, who didn’t even smile about her teasing. Instead he had his eyes on the sleeping baby, obviously unable to take them from her.

“Oliver?” Felicity whispered.

“I will always take care of her,” he then said, still staring at Emmeline. “I failed once. I’m not gonna do it again.”

Right away Felicity’s thoughts snapped back to the night their daughter had been born.

* * *

 

“Are you okay?”

Felicity sighed in annoyance. Ever since they had arrived at the hospital, Oliver had kept asking this and a few other questions, and although she was really trying to do her best not to get mad at him for it, he really seemed to push it. Why else would he ask the same things all few seconds?

“I’m fine,” she growled without even looking at him.

She had started to stride up and down her room half an hour ago. Felicity was impatient. She wanted to have the baby right now, but the doctor had said it might still take hours, and she probably wasn’t going to give birth before the early morning. It annoyed her almost as much as Oliver’s overworried face.

“Is there anything that-”

“No!” she interrupted him, rolling her eyes. One more of those questions he couldn’t stop asking. “There is nothing you can do and nothing that you have to do, so could you please just-”

She almost cursed when she heard the knock on the door that interrupted her just beginning rant.

“Yes?” Oliver and Felicity said at the same time.

The door opened, and Diggle entered the room. He smiled at them.

“Hey, how are things going with my favorite couple?”

“Great,” Oliver answered. Even his voice couldn’t hide how happy he was.

“Well, it would be great,” Felicity corrected him, “if someone wasn’t such a pain in the ass. Where the hell is Thea? She promised to come here as soon as possible and stop him before I can kill him because I swear if he keep asking those questions, I will kill him, and I will probably regret it later since I won’t have anyone to work the nightshifts on the baby.”

Diggle grinned.

He shouldn’t, Felicity thought. She would kill Oliver if he didn’t stop. He really annoyed her, and the pregancy had changed a few things about her. She was kind of sure that she could be able to indeed kill him when he didn’t see it coming.

“Diggle, what’s wrong?” Oliver finally asked. “You didn’t really come here to pay us a visit while Felicity is giving birth, right?”

“No,” Diggle answered honestly. “Lyla just called. There is a problem at A.R.G.U.S.. It looks like someone hacked into their system and tried to free the prisoners. They already have all their agents on it, but it seems like they still have trouble to keep their prisoners in place. And they can’t find the ones responsible for this, so…”

“Send Roy and Laurel up to A.R.G.U.S.. They can help.”

“I already did. Man, I wouldn’t ask for your help given the circumstances here, but they need every helping hand, catching those guys. They are trying to cause a chaos in the city, hacking into traffic engineering and so on. If we don’t get to them as soon as possible the city will end up in chaos.”

“That is perfect!” Felicity exclaimed, receiving strange looks from the two men around her. “Well, not the city ending up like that, but it is the perfect reason for the Arrow to show up which means that Oliver will have to leave, and I don’t have to put up with him any longer.”

“I’m not leaving,” Oliver said firmly, ignoring the fact that his wife obviosly suffered from his presence.

Felicity sighed, turning around to him and putting her hands on his tensed shoulders. “Oliver, it will take hours till the baby is born. I swear I will call you if things are getting serious, but as long as nothing is happening here and all we can do is waiting, you should go and help the people of the city. Like you always do.”

“Well, I’d rather help my wife tonight?”

“Really?” she asked with a loving smile.

Oliver nodded and kissed her softly.

“Great,” she cheered, pulling him to his feet and pushing him to the door. “You’re helping me by not being here.”

Befor he could protest, Diggle had already opened the door, leaving the room, and Felicity just pushed Oliver out, too, closing the door behind him, and breathed in, smiling now that she was alone.

 

The doctor was right about the birth taking hours - more hours than expected. Felicity had kept walking around the room until she had been so tired that she felt the need to lie down. In the mean time Thea had sent her a message, telling her that she was on her way, but stuck in her car since the situation on the streets was a mess.

Her cell kept ringing, but Felicity didn’t even take a look at it. She knew it probably was Oliver. He had called her twice before, and while she had thought he might need her IT skills at first it turned out the fact that he wasn’t here didn’t really keep him from asking the same questions. So she just ignored his calls.

“Mrs. Queen?” She looked up when she saw a nurse coming in. “Dr. McLuthan asked me to take you to a different room. There are a few victims from accidents coming in, so we need to rearrange some patients. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, not a all,” Felicity said, taking seat in the wheelchair and letting herself be pushed out of the room and through the corridor. “Are the victims seriously hurt?”

“It’s not that bad,” the nurse answered while pushing Felicity into the elevator. “Traffic is just going crazy tonight.”

“Yeah, my sister-in-law was supposed to be here, but it turns out the traffic really is a mess tonight. I just hope she will be here in time because she is the only one who can put her brother in his place. He is really annoying me. Are future fathers always like that?”

The nurse huffed a short laugh. “Mostly yes.”

Maybe it hadn’t been fair to sent him away, Felicity thought silently. Oliver was just nervous. Well, so was she. And she missed him already. Although she would probably never tell him.

It wasn’t until the nurse pushed her out of the elevator that Felicity took in her surroundings.

“Why are we in the underground parking?” Felicity asked, suddenly becoming mistrustful. “What are we doing here?”

The nurse didn’t answer and Felicity acutally started to try and get out of the wheelechair, but was too afraid to fall and hurt the baby to actually do it. Meanwhile the nurse kept pushing her to a black van.

When they were only a few feet away, the driver's door opened, and a tall woman with long legs and a thin body got out. Her red curles jumped with the movement.

“Well, well, Mrs. Queen,” she said in a happy singsang. “Looks like you have something that belongs to me.”

The nurse had stopped pushing the wheelechair which led Felicity to try and get up and away. It was her only thought - she had to escape. Right now! Carrie Cutter aka Cupid was certainly the last person she should be having a conversation with while waiting for the time to finally give birth. Cupid probably still wasn’t over the fact that she didn’t get to be with the Arrow, so what reason could she have to just talk to his wife?

As soon as Felicity started to get up, already preparing herself to run as fast as possible, the nurse pushed her back in the chair, so Felicity was trapped. There was no way she could escape without risking the baby.

“What are you doing here?” Felicity asked and gripped the arm rest of the wheelchair when a sudden pain came up. The contractions had come in smaller intervals, but Dr. McLuthan had said that it would still take some time.

“You know, I was really pissed when I heard about your wedding, and I was even more pissed when I heard about your pregnancy. There is no reason for Arrow to choose you when he could have me. I could at least fight crime with him. You are just a little girl. Well, and then today someone obviously had fun messing up some of the A.R.G.U.S.' engeerings which gave me the perfect opportunity to escape. They probably still haven’t found out. Idiots!”

“What are you doing here?” Felicity repeated her question.

“You know I thought I might pay our lover a little visit. I saw him and was already ready to present myself to him when he mumbled something about being out in the field while his wife was in labor. God, you have no idea how much that hurt. I actually thought he was leaving you during your pregnancy, but apparently I was wrong.”

Felicity didn’t even ask why Cupid had thought something like that. She was too distracted by the now growing pain. She prayed that the baby hadn’t decided to make a sudden appearance after it had taken its time all those hours.

“Well, I thought about what I was going to do, and then I kind of found my answer. My beloved loves that baby. So I will love that baby, and that baby will love me. I will be his or her mother. I will raise it, and when it is old enough, I will meet my beloved and give back the child to him, but that child will be so drawn to me that he won’t have a choice, but to let me stay with him. And he will love me.”

“So that’s your plan? You will snatch the baby, kill me and just hope for Oliver to love you?”

“Oh, I won’t have to wait very long. From the moment he sees me with the child, he will love me,” Cupid stated. “But now it’s time for action. We’ve spent way too much time on talking already.”

Felicity didn’t know when it happened, but the nurse who had brought her down here had left. Cupid took two more steps towards her, standing right in front of her.

“I will never let you take my baby,” Felicity said.

“Oh, don’t worry,” Cupid smiled devilishly “I don’t need your approval.”

She pulled a scalpel out of the bag of her jeans and Felicity’s eyes widened in panic. She knew that she couldn’t escape. Even without being pregnant and in labor, Cupid would be faster than her. And since Felicity knew the hospital, she also knew that there weren’t any cameras down here. She was trapped.

“So… if you want to be a good mother for as long as you get to be one, you should just get up and get into the van, so I can proceed a C-section. Don’t worry, I’ve learned how to do it and- ah!”

Cupid’s little speech was interrupted by her own scream of pain when an arrow was shot through the palm of the hand that had held the scalpel.

Felicty could literally feel the release, seeing the arrow and felt a smile spreading all over her face when she saw that it was red. Roy had complained about the fact that he didn’t get a chance for revenge on the one time Cupid had so easily won against him.

“Get away from them!”

* * *

 

Even the memory of that part of the night made a shiver go down her spine. Felicity couldn’t really say that she hadn’t been afraid because she had been. The thought of not getting to know her own child had been freaking her out. If Roy hadn’t come-

“I’m sorry,” Oliver interrupted her thoughts, shifting Emmeline in his arms, so he could slide one arm around Felicity’s back, pulling her towards him and kissing her temple. “I shouldn’t have reminded you.”

“It’s okay,” Felicity said after a while, again putting food on the fork and offering it to Oliver. “You know you haven’t failed her.”

“Well, I did when I left.”

“Then I did by sending you away.”

“No. You had your reasons for not wanting me there. I should have insisted to stay.”

“You know what, let’s not fight about that because we both know I’m just going to win, and then you will be grumpy all evening, and that is not how I planned the first evening our baby sleeps. Besides, I'd rather think about the second part of that night.”

Felicity set the bowl with the remaining food on the table, snuggling into Oliver’s chest and putting one hand on her daughter’s tummy, while Oliver rested his chin on her head.

“Tell me about it,” he whispered.

“Well, I don’t really remember what happened between Roy showing up and you coming to the hospital,” she admitted. Everything had gone so fast, and she had been in such a pain that her senses had refused to take in more than necessary. All she knew was that Roy had told her that he had been the nearest to them when Lyla found out that Cupid had escaped and that he had rushed to her immediately. “I know how relieved I was to see you there. Unharmed. And then you kissed me, and you held my hand while I pushed, and then Emmy was there. Screaming of course.”

“Guess, she has inherited her mother’s loud voice,” Oliver grinned, getting lightly slapped on the chest by Felicity which only caused him to laugh.

“And later we were alone with her, and I held her, and you just sat there silently, holding both of us,” Felicity continued. “And then I gave her to you, and you held her the first time. You know, I still dream about that. About your face, and how much peace there suddenly was in you.”

She remembered the look on his face, the smile on his lips and the soft tone in his voice when they talked about Emmeline’s middle name. Felicity had suggested that since Roy had saved both of them from Carrie Cutter they might name her Emmeline Harper Queen instead of Emmeline Grace Queen like they had planned. Oliver had agreed, too much distracted by the feeling of holding his baby.

“You dream about me, refusing to give her back to you, too?” Oliver grinned after pressing his lips to her temple again.

“No,” Felicity answered. “And I don’t dream about the fact that we actually had to start the timer to give her to each other every three minutes either. Speaking of, your three minutes are more than over.”

“You didn’t set a timer, so I don’t believe you.”

Felicity laughed silently, not moving to take Emmeline from him anyway. She wanted to stay like this as long as possible. With ther daughter crying almonst all day it was impossible to get some time just for the two of them.

“About our wedding day,” she began therefore.

“Next Monday. I know. You don’t have to remind me.”

“I wasn’t gonna remind you,” Felicity said, rolling her eyes although she had to admit that she hadn’t believed he’d known. He had so many things going on in his head that she wouldn’t have minded if he hadn’t known. “Actually I was talking to Thea earlier the day and asked her to take Emmy for the evening. And the night.”

Those last three words were said so quietly that she wouldn't have been surprised if he hadn’t heart them.

“It will be our first night without her,” Oliver said. His voice didn’t really help Felicity to find out what he was thinking. “Don’t you think it is too soon?”

“Well, that’s what I thought, but then I asked the doctor and he said that it will be almost four weeks then. So we could at least try. You know, go gentle. But if I’m not in too much pain then we could actually do it. He said it’s just important to not rush it, to trust each other and to stop it when it hurts too much.”

Oliver was silent for a while. “What if I’m in too much pain for it?”

“Why would you be in pain?”

“Well, she’s my daughter, too.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that I’m the one who pressed her through my vagina.”

“I don’t think you can use the vagina argument even after birth.”

“Why would I need an argument? It’s a medical fact that I will be the one who could be in pain when we’re doing this.”

Again Oliver was silent. He had taken his chin from her head and when Felicity looked up to him, he was frowning.

“Are we talking about the same thing here?” he then asked her. “Because I’m talking about our daughter spending the first night away from us.”

“I’m talking about sex.”

Even before Oliver’s eyes widened, she felt herself blushing. God, she was married to this man for almost a year now, and they had a baby, how could she still be blushing when they talked about sex?!

Oliver leaned down his head and kissed her passionately, causing her to slide her arms around his neck and climibing into his lap as far as possible without waking up Emmy. She could feel heat all over her body when she let her hands slide over his abs.

“Well, maybe there is a way for us to survive one night without her,” Oliver mumbled against her lips. “Maybe we just need to hold onto each other very tightly.”


	5. A vow each year

He didn’t even make it through the door before his vision was blocked by a bulk of blond hair in his face. Not even a second later he felt her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Dropping his briefcase, he put his hands on her thighs that were only covered by a thin robe and held her close to him to make sure he wouldn’t drop her. Not that dropping her had ever been an option.

Oliver had had a stressful day at QC. He had spent too much hours in boring meetings and over complicated reports, trying not to think too much about the fact that when he’d come home, the first time in weeks his daughter wouldn’t be there. He had barely been able to picture the time before Emmeline had been born and the only thing that had gotten him through the day was the promise of some sexy time with his beautiful, gorgeous, intelligent and really hot wife.

Now that he was holding Felicity in his arms, he almost felt the need to laugh about his lack of memory earlier the day. This - Felicity jumping in his arms before he made it through the door - was what evenings had been like before Emmeline was born and before Felicity’s belly had been to big for her to jump like this.

“Hey, baby,” he whispered in her ears while Felicity was already peppering his neck with sweet, little kisses. He stepped into the house, closing the door with a kick of his foot behind him. “Looks like you were waiting for me.”

Felicity pulled back slightly, so she could look at Oliver, but at the same time tightened her arms and legs around his body.

“I was waiting,” she answered then with a smile and let the fingers of her right hand slide along his stubbled jaw. “I came back from Thea half an hour ago, prepared everything for our night and since then I have been impatiently waiting for you to come here, so we could start.”

“How did Emmeline take it?” he asked with worry, rubbing his hand up and down Felicity’s thighs. “Being apart from both of us? And the whole being fed with a bottle for the first time?”

“Well, thanks to the bottle you bought she took the thing pretty well,” Felicity answered, smiling when she thought about the fact that her husband had done five full hours of research to find out which bottle was the best to use when the baby was still being breast-fed. He finally had found a bottle which needed the same technique of sucking like the breast - something like that. “And I called Thea two minutes ago because I couldn’t stand not knowing how Emmy was any longer, and it turned out our daughter doesn’t even seem to miss us.”

Oliver frowened, moving through the room and up the stairs.

“I will have a serious talk to Emmy as soon as she is back and reveal to her that it is her obligation to miss us.”

“Yes, tell her that. I mean, we both know how relieved I was when she finally started sleeping in her crib, but that didn’t mean that I wanted her to not miss us. It hurts. That she doesn’t miss us as much as we miss her.”

“Will it help if I tell you that I missed you?” Oliver asked, pressing his lips to her forehead, her right cheek, her left cheek and finally her nose. “A lot?”

“Maybe,” she answered, running her hands through his short hair. “Let’s see if we can soothe the pain of our daughter’s abscence. I prepared something in the bathroom.”

“That sounds promising,” Oliver said and carried her to the bathroom where Felicity let go of him only to show him everything she had set up in there.

She had prepared a bubble bath, electrical candles all over the room. On a small table right beside the bathtub she had put some grapes, two wine glasses and a bottle of grapejuice.

“I thought,” she then said, cutting the knot of her rope and letting the thin fabric falling down to the floor, “we should start with some relaxation.”

Before Oliver got to take in the full sight of her naked body, the soft curves of her body and the play of light on her perfect skin, she had sunken down in the water, her body disappearing under the thick foam. She looked up at him with a requesting expression in her face while she put her hair up in a messy bun.

“Will you be standing there all night, or do you have any intentions on joining me because…”  
She didn’t finish her sentence, instead just pulled up one leg slightly, so her knee was over the surface, letting her fingers dance on the exposed skin.

It took Oliver several seconds before he could bring himself to move, but once he started, he almost ripped off all his clothes, climbing in the hot water behind her soon after and pulling her back to his chest, so her head rested on his shoulder and the lower part of her body was trapped between his legs.

Both of them sighed quietly. Since Emmeline was born, they had barely had time to spent just for themselves. Of course being with their daughter was nice, and they loved the family time they got to spent with each other, but they were still young human beings who happened to be madly in love with each other. Even a year of marriage didn’t change that.

“This is nice,” Oliver sighed after a while, letting the fingers of his right hand run from her hip over the outside of her thigh down to her knee and back up, slightly stroking the inside of her thigh till he reached her hip and repeated the same motion over and over again.

“It will become even nicer,” Felicity promised while playing with his left hand or rather with his wedding ring. She kept spinning it around his finger and then took it off and run it over every finger of his left hand before sliding it back to his ring finger where she spun it again. When she made a move to take it off again, Oliver closed his hand to a fist and leaned his head down, so his lips were touching her ear.

“I don’t like to have my ring taken off,” he whispered. “It feels wrong.”

He let his left arm slide around her chest while his right hand kept moving over her thigh. Felicity put her hands on his forearm and pressed her forehead to his neck, enjoying the feeling of Oliver being so close.

“It was a great first year, wasn’t it?” she asked and closed her eyes. “I mean... nobody close to us died or even got seriously injured. We got through our first year of marriage without any major fights, and we got Emmeline.”

“Emmeline was my personal highlight this year.”

“Yeah, mine, too.”

They spent a few moments in silence. Oliver pressed some soft kisses to her temple that made Felicity sight.

“You know, I’ve been thinking about something,” Oliver said after a while. “When I chose the promises for your wedding vow, I had some trouble to reduce them to just five because there were so many things I wanted you to promise me. So I figured that maybe we could make this a tradition. Making the other promise something.”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed. “So a vow each year?”

“Yes. A lot can happen each year, things we probably never thought could happen. So how about wee add a promise every wedding anniversary? You tell me what you want me to promise, and I tell you what I want you to promise.”

“Sounds great. I’ll start. I want you to promise to do the salmon ladder at least once a week until you are seventy. I will go with sixty if you happen to lose an arm or something. Is it possible to do the salmon ladder with just one arm? Because if it is then you have to do it even with just one arm. Not that you should lose an arm, but-”

Oliver stopped her rambling, kissing a spot on her neck, he knew was very sensitive. He bit down lightly before kissing it again.

“I promise that I will do the salmon ladder at least once a week no matter how many arms I will have.”

“Until you’re seventy?”

“I raise the stakes and say it until I’m eighty.”

“Oh, I know why I married you, Mr. Queen.”

“Well, you might regret it when you here what I want you to promise me.”

“Then what is it?”

“I want you to promise me to not send me away when our next baby is on the way. I want to sit at your side while you are in labor the whole time and not run around in the city, worrying that something might go wrong, and I’m not there to protect you.”

For a long time nobody said anything, the only thing that could be heard was the sound of the water that was lightly sloshing.

“Who says that there will be another baby?” Felicity then asked.

Oliver grinned. He knew Felicity good enough to notice the undertone of her question. She didn’t really want to start a serious conversation, confessing to him that she wanted Emmeline to grow up as an only-child right now.

“Well, I say so,” Oliver therefore said, letting his right hand again travel up the inside of her thigh, but instead of moving it over her hip, he let his fingers slide right between her thighs, slightly touching her clit before stroking her folds.

Felicity’s reaction was all he had hoped for. She moaned, arched her back and pressed her head to his shoulder. Her eyes were still closed, and she bit down on her bottom lip like he loved it so much. When he started moving his fingers between her folds, she turned her head towards him, gripping his hair with one hand, and pulled his lips closer, so she could kiss him.

Their lips met softly in a light kiss, but Felicity soon felt Oliver’s tongue sliding over the line between her lips, begging for entrence she gladly gave him. As soon as her lips opened, his tongue slid in, his teeth nibbling at her bottom lip.

They stayed like that for a while before Oliver slightly pulled back and let his forehead rest against hers. His fingers kept stroking her sex. 

“Tell me you want another baby.”

“No,” she whispered, but couldn’t help the smile that spread over her face. She had missed the whole teasing thing they used to do, and they often did while or right before having sex.

Oliver let his fingers travel higher until they reached her clit where they started to draw little circles. Felicity moaned again, tightening the grip she had on his forearm that was still pressing down on her stomach.

“Oliver,” she breathed. Her hips started moving to increase the pressure of his fingers and to give her even more pleasure.

He loved the way she said his name when she was like this, when the pleasure was beginning to build deep inside of her. But he knew he needed to give her even more to make her so lost in it that she would basically promise him anything. So he moved his fingers to her entrance and kissed first the side of her neck, then her cheek. He bit down on her ear lobe, pulling it between his lips and letting his tongue play with the soft skin before moving his fingers slightly and asking, “May I?”

“Please,” she answered and not even two seconds after the last sound had escaped her lips two of his fingers slid into her, making her back arch even more and letting her moans become louder.

Oliver moved his fingers gently, slowy pulling them in and out, stroking the wet inside while nibbling at her neck. He knew Felicity had been a little scared about the first sex after the birth, probably still was. She had somewhere heard that it might hurt and had been scared of it. Oliver hadn’t admit it, but he had been scared, too. He didn’t want to hurt her, especially not with having sex. The longer she was squirming in his arms, the safer he felt that what he was doing was okay.

When she was starting to tighten around his fingers he pressed his thumb down on her clit. It was all that she needed to be pushed over the edge. She stoped breathing, opening her mouth in a silent cry when the pleasure washed all over her body that started to tremble fiercely.

He kept stroking her until she came down from her high. She then turned her head towards him again and nibbled along his stubbled jaw.

“I missed this,” she whispered, opening her eyes and looked up at him.

Oliver responded with a smile and let his lips sink to hers for a moment before answerin, “Yeah, me too.”

Felicity sat up fast, turned around and let herself be pulled into Oliver's lap. She slid both arms around his neck and kissed ihm passionately, while slipping one hand down his chest and over his defined abs till her finger tips reached his alread hard cock.

He moand when she started to pump him. His head fell back, letting her free access to suck along the side of his neck while simultanously scratching over his stuble with her free hand.

“Felicity,” he breathed, moving one hand up her spine and pulling her tie out of her hair. The blond curls fell down to her shoulders. “Please.”

She got up on her knees, guiding his erection to her entrance and looked him deeply into the eyes, getting almost lost by the lust and desire she saw there. Felicity smiled, causing Oliver to put his hands to her hips.

“Gently,” she warned hastily.

Even if her first orgasm had come easily and without any pain she still feared that him inside of her could bring some pain.

Oliver nodded, pulling her face to him, so he could kiss her slowly. The kiss was full of love and gentleness like he was trying to convince her that he was also going to make love to her in that slow, soft way.

Felicity sank down slowly. Oliver didn’t move, letting her adjust to the feeling of having him inside of her again for the first time in so long.

As soon as she started to move her hips slightly, he started, too, meeting her hips in light, soft movements that made both of them moan.

“Oliver,” she whispered and laid her forehead against his, sliding her arms around his neck while barley moving her hip, making his hard erection move inside of her ever so slightly.

Still it was enough to make her pleasure increase. She had guessed that she wouldn’t last long. It had been too long ago that he had been inside of her the last time. When she felt the heat boil insider her stomach building and a prickle starting in her toes she let her fingers slide down Oliver’s back, scratching the skin to let him know that she was close.

“Felicity,” he then breathed, letting her know that he was close, too.

He then tightened this grip on her hips, stilling her movements while pushing up just a little harder. The first stroke made her moan, the second earned him a high-pitched scream.

“Tell me you want another baby,” he said again, stoping his movements and looking at her.

“I want another baby.”

Satisfied he pushed up one more time, the third stroke finally let her gasp breathlessly before she held her breath and her mouth opened, giving him the perfect opportunity to let his tongue glide between her lips. Her body trembled all over him, her limbs losing any tension.

It wasn’t until she started breathing again that he let go and let his own pleasure wash over him.

“God, Felicity,” he moaned, his eyes screwing shut and spilling his seed inside of her hot core. “I love you.”

Felicity smiled against his neck. She had rested her head on his shoulder, enjoying the feeling of his arms around her with this fingers running up and down his spine and more importantly him still inside of her.

They stayed like that for several minutes before Olivers cleared his throat, making her lift her head from his shoulder to look at him.

“I don’t want to ruin this really perfect moment, but could we please call Thea at make sure Emmeline is okay?”

“Thank god you’re asking,” Felicity smiled, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “I thought I was crazy for wanting to call her right away.”

They both laughed, staying in the bathtub for several moments before climbing out of it and calling Thea. For the first time this evening.  
It turned out to not be the last.


	6. The first story ever told

When Oliver came home, it was already long after midnight. He opened the door, closed it behind him as quitely as he could and put his keys on the small table right beside the door. The house was quite, the most quiet it had ever been it seemed. 

The night had been exhausting to say the least. He had been in the lair for the first time what seemed in years although he actually new that it had been just a little more than four nights. The last time he had been down there had been the night Emmeline had been born. Ever since he had left things to Roy, Laurel and Diggle.

Today had been a little mess. There had been several alarms all over the city, and it had been impossible for the three of them to handle on their own so he had come and helped them. He knew that he was going to go back there some time not far in the future. Felicity wanted it that way. While he was perfectly fine with spending his days like a normal dad - working a normal job and coming home to his wife and his daughter - Felicity turned out to need more. She wanted to go back to the lair, and he was not going to let her do that alone which left him no choice, but to go back to being the Arrow as well.

Why couldn’t he say no to her?

Oliver breathed in deeply, trying to concentrate on the thought of Felicity and Emmeline instead of what he had to see this night.

Nonetheless the picture of the small girl, crying in her mothers arms while her father was beaten up by some gang members sneaked itself back into his head.

He let his suit jacket fall to the floor, followed by the tie that he had put back on loosely after changing back from his Arrow suit. While climbing the stairs he rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt.

He knew the only thing helping to cope with what had happened tonight was to hold onto what he had here. So he quietly opened the door to the bedroom, finding Felicity sleeping on her stomach with her head in the pillow and her golden locks all around it like a halo.

Oliver’s fingers ached to touch her, but he knew the slightest touch could wake her, so he just creeped to her side, taking a full breath of the smell of her hair and skin before grabbing the baby monitor on her small nightstand and sneaking back out. Felicity really needed the sleep.

So he sneaked into the nursery where he found Emmeline in her crib.

“Look who isn’t sleeping?” he whispered when he saw that her eyes weren’t closed. “Thank you for being so silent and not waking Mommy.”

He then took her out of her bed, cradling her in his strong arms and sitting down in the rocking chair, slowly swaying back and forth.

“Do you remember the first story I told you?” he asked, looking down to her as if he was really expecting her to answer. “I told you how I met your mother, but unlike this Ted guy in the show Mommy made me watch, I really told you the story of how I met her. Well, both stories since we both know I met her for the first time twice.”

He smiled thinking about it. He had come home after a night as rough as this one. He had found Felicity reading in their bed. She hadn’t made it to the foundry with the morning sickness that she had suffered from all day. He had lain down beside her and had pressed his head to her stomach and quietly started to tell his unborn baby that every time he was feeling exhausted and sad, he just thought about the two times he had met Felicity for the first time.  
Meanwhile Felicity had started to run her hand through his hair and at some point had asked him what the hell he was doing there since she hadn’t been able to hear him, but had his lips felt touching her stomach slightly.

“It’s really the best medicine,” he said. “I just think about her, and my whole world starts to get better. And now that I have you, everything is even better.”

He looked up when he sensed Felicity’s presence. She was leaning in the door frame, watching Emmeline and him sitting there. As soon as their eyes met she started smiling.

“I guess I woke you. Sorry for that,” he said immediately. “I didn’t mean to wake you. I just needed to smell you.”

Felicity frowned, hearing those words, but quickly waved it aside and hurried across the room to climb into Oliver’s lap. She slid one arm around his neck, put the other hand down on her daughter's stomach and rested her head against Oliver’s.

“You didn’t wake me, at least not by sneaking in and out of our bedroom. It turns out I can sleep with people coming near me at any time, but as soon as someone opens the door to the nursery, I wake up. Maternal instinct, I guess.”

“Probably,” he whispered, looking down to Emmelines who’s eyes started to close slowly. He knew it was only going to take seconds before she would fall asleep.

“Rough night in the Arrow-cave.”

He nodded without saying anything.

“Want to talk about it?”

He shook his head, still not saying anything.

“Ol-”

“I don’t need to talk about it right now. All I needed to do was reminding myself that I have you, and we have Emmeline, and everything was getting better by itself. It might help, though, if we could just stay here a little bit longer.”

Felicity nodded, pressing a kiss to his temple and stroking his hair lightly.

“Sure. As long as you want it.”


	7. Your Mummy totally kicked my ass

He heard Emmeline crying even from outside the house when he searched for his keys in the pocket of his jeans.

Today should have been the first night for Felicity to come back to the foundry with him. She had been longing for this day to finally come and had been more than disappointed when Emmeline had begin to suffer from a terrible colic earlier the day. They had had a little more than one week of a really quiet baby, and now it was even worse than before she had started to sleep without someone holding her.

When Oliver opened the door he found Felicity walking back and forth in the living room, little Emmeline lying on her shoulder while screaming as loudly as never before. For like a second he wondered how Felicity could hold her that close to her ear without becoming deaf.

But then he saw Felicity’s face. She looked awful - as much as his beautiful, lovely, sexy Felicity could ever look less than beautiful, lovely and sexy - with glassy eyes and dark shadows on the skin right below. Her skin was pale and her body was shivering from the lack of sleep. She looked even worse - as much as his beautiful, lovely, sexy Felicity could ever look less than beautiful, lovely and sexy -  than she had right after the exhausting labor. Her eyes were half closed, the glasses sitting on the tip of her nose, threatening to fall down with every rocking step she took. Her skin was almost white and the shadows in her face that dark that people could assume she was a junkie or even worse a victim of domestic violence.

“Okay,” he said, putting his keys on the small table beside the door and going right towards her. “Felicity, you need to lie down and get some rest. I’ll take care of Emmy. Go get some sleep.”

He took the screaming and strongly moving baby out of her arms to press Emmeline against his chest while pressing a kiss to Felicity’s head.

She readjusted her glasses and looked up to him.

“Are you sure? You had a long day at work and then down in the Arrow cave, and all I had to do was-”

“All you had to do?” he asked frowning. “I guess even a full fight against the League of Assassins couldn’t tire me out as much as being alone with our sick little Emmeline all day. Now get some sleep. I’m taking care of her.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, kissing him on the cheek and then going upstairs to their bedroom.

“You are lucky you are that small,” Oliver whispered to his daughter, taking off his shoes and settling down on the couch. He put Emmeline onto his chest, her head lying on his collarbone. He softly rubbed his daughter’s back, trying to give her some comfort. “If you were a little older and bigger, I’d totally kick your ass for getting on her nerves. Although she’d probably be able to do that herself.”

He looked down to Emmeline. She wasn’t really relaxed, but it felt like she was getting tired. Certainly, screaming all day in a volume that could easily shatter all windows of the house must be exhausting.

“Emmy, have I ever told you the story of how your Mommy totally kicked my ass?” he asked, ignoring the fact that he sounded way too much like this Ted Mosby guy.

* * *

 

He was walking back and forth in Thea’s penthouse or their penthouse, considering they’ve been living here together for a while now.

Turning Ra’s down had been the right decision. Deep down he knew that Diggle had been right. He couldn’t save anyone by losing his own soul. He hadn’t said it that way, but Oliver was kind of sure that Diggle had meant it like that.

So he was not going to Nanda Parbat to be the next Ra’s. He was going to stay here in a city he felt haunted in because of the death of Tommy, his mother and Sara and even because of the people he had killed.  
He was going to stay here with his sister who was now part of the life he had never wanted for her, silently suffering while the love of his life was happy with a different man.

He shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about it. He had no right to think about it. He had pushed her away, and she had chosen to move on. She was happy, and he wanted her to be happy, so-

The knock on the door pulled him back to the present before he was able to think about it for too long. Instead he walked to the door, pulled it open and found himself face to face with the woman he had just started to think about.

“Felicity, what-?” he started, but stopped when she walked just past him into the penthouse. He hesitated, unsure what was happening here, before closing the door and turning around to her.

She stood in the middle of the room, arms pressed to her sides and hands formed to hard fists. Her eyes were full of what he assumed was anger. He wasn’t sure, though, since the light was reflecting from her glasses, so he couldn’t really see her eyes.

Oliver felt his heartbeat fastening. It was enough to just look at her for his body to react. He even felt the light flutter in his stomach he refused to call butterflies. He was an insanly strong man. There were no butterflies inside of him.

“What-?” he started again, again being stopped by the woman in front of him.

Felicity raised the index finger of her left hand, still staring at him with what he was now sure was anger. So he waited for her to talk, knowing that her anger was only going to grow if he made a new attempt to speak.

“You and me,” she said, gesturing between him and herself, “are together.”

Oliver raised his eyebrows in question, quietly wondering if she might be drunk.

“What?” he asked then.

“You and me,” she repeated and again gestured between the two of them “are together.”

“Feli-”

“No!” she shouted, causing him to shut up. “We are together. I know that you think that we are not and even that we shouldn’t be because your life is oh so dangerous, but I don’t care!”

“Felicity-”

“Stop Felicity-ing me!” she almost screamed, the expression on her face changing. He could tell from the look in her face that she was babbling inside of her head, and Oliver needed to bite down on his tongue to not grin at the sight of her.

However, she shook her head and put her angry face back on.

“We are together,” she stated again. “We are together because you told me you love me, and we both know I love you, so since be both love each other, you will just get over yourself and be with me because none of the rest of it matters and because- because- because I say so!”

She was panting, still staring at him with anger, and he felt the little resistance he had had when she had come here crumble.

“You love me?” he then asked quietly.

Felicity looked up at him in surprise and nodded. “Of course. You know that.”

“But you’re with Palmer now.”

“I was with Ray, yes, but it didn’t feel right, so I broke up with him.”

“And you love me?” he repeated the question again. He really needed her to say it. She needed to say it.

“Yes,” she answered, cocking her head slightly. “I love you.”

That was it. He had always had little resistance when it came to her, and when she had turned up at the penthouse, staring at him with all this anger, he had known that he wasn’t going to last long. She was too damn hot when she was standing in his home like it was the most natural thing for her and kicking his ass like she always did.

So he took the three steps to close the distance between Felicity and him, framed her beautiful face with his hands and kissed her with all he had inside of him. He put all his love and longing, his passion and pain of the last few months in it. Oliver waited till he felt her fully relax into him, leaning to his chest and grabbing the back of his dark henley. When that happened, he opened his mouth and moved his tongue to softly touch her lips with it, asking for entrance. And she gave it to him. She opened her mouth with a moan which gave him the opportunity to let his tongue slide over hers while his teeth cautiously bit her bottom lip.

He enjoyed every second of this kiss, and he would have probably never let go of her lips if he hadn’t felt her need for breath. Since he just couldn’t get himself to let his lips leave her skin, he just moved his lips from the corner of her mouth to her jaw and finally to her neck where he sucked the soft skin, planning on leaving a mark there that was going to tell everyone that she was his. At least for the next few days.

“God, this feels so right,” he heard her say while he kept sucking her skin. His hands moved from her face to the back of her neck and down her spine to her waist where he slid his arms around her tiny body to pull her towards him even more. “I really didn’t think this was going to work. It thought you were going to put me down again, telling me that we weren’t supposed to be together because you are the Arrow and it is all too dangerous. But I like this ending more, so… I love you. I really love you. And it feels so right, so much more right than with Ray because- hey, why are you stoping?”

Oliver breathed in sharply and looked her in the eyes. 

“Felicity, I love you, and I loved your babbling, but could you please not talk about Palmer while I am kissing you?”

“Oh,” she said, “sure. Sorry.”

He lowered her face back to where he was sucking on the skin of her neck.

They kept doing that for a while before they slid into bet, holding each other and falling asleep.

* * *

 

“That is not how I remember the night going,” he heard a voice, causing him to turn his head and look to where she was standing on the stairs.

“I thought you were sleeping,” he smiled.

“You know I can barely sleep when you’re not there,” she answered while moving towards him, cautiously climing on top of him and resting her head on his shoulder. She cupped the back of Emmeline’s head. Her daughter was now asleep.

“I didn’t want to traumatize her by going into the details.”

“I don’t think she will be traumatized by knowing that her parents were crazy after each other from the first moment of their relationship and had the most amazig first sex ever had.”

He laughed quietly. “So… You want to tell me about how you remember that night going?”

“My pleasure,” she smirked. “So where did you stop?”

“I moved my lips back to the soft spot of your neck, sucking the skin there after you started to ramble about Palmer.”

* * *

 

He lowered her face back to where he was sucking on the skin of her neck. God, that man knew how to kiss! And although she knew that he was working on leaving a mark at a place that wasn’t easy to cover, she just let him continue.

Felicity let her hands move over his back, enjoying the play of muscels she could feel under the thin fabric of his henley she soon found herself gripping again to pull it up his body. Since she wasn’t nearly tall enough to pull it over his head on her own, Oliver moved back slightly, throwing the shirt away.

She couldn’t stop herself from staring at him. She had seen him shirtless before, multiple times even, but it was something different to have him standing right in fron of her with just his jeans on and knowing that she could just reach out a hand and touch his skin without it being inappropriate. So she soon let actions follow, moving her hands to his hips and let them glide over his soft skin as slowly as she could without going insane. When she reached his neck, she moved up to her toes to press a passionate kiss to his lips.

Not even a second later she felt his hands gripping the underside of her knees, picking her up from the floor with her legs sliding around his waist all by themselves. It felt like the most natural thing she had ever done.

Everything was so slow. She had ached to be with this man for so long, wanting nothing else than to be with him the way they were now, and still they acted like they had all time in the world, like they did this all day and could enjoy every second of it because there was no hellish urge.  
It was definitely different than her first time with Ray which was nice, but not only didn’t really feel right, but was also full of hurry and-

“Oliver!” she exclaimed when he threw her away from his body. Thank God, she was landing on a bed. Looking around, she found that Oliver must have moved them to a bedroom. Which was obvious. Because of the bed.

Oliver was standing at the door, a few steps away from her. He had thrown her through half of the room. She looked at him in consternation.

“What the hell, Oliver?” she asked. “I could have gotten hurt!”

“I told you to please stop talking about Palmer,” he almost growled, shutting the door behind him. “It would be nice of you to not talk or even think about your exboyfriend while we are doing this.”

Felicity pressed her lips together, moving two fingers over them like she was zipping them which earned her a smile from Oliver, who took off his jeans and then climbed into bed. He was on top of her, holding his weight away from her, but lowering his head enough to kiss her senseless.

How could they have waited this long? She should have jumped him on their first date. She probably would have if the bomb hadn’t happened. A lot would have happened if the explosion hadn’t been. Well, and there were things that wouldn’t have happened if the explosion hadn’t happened. Like sleeping with somene else. God, this was so much better than with Ray.

Oliver collapsed right on top of her, letting out a sighing breath and pressing her body down into the mattress.

“What am I going to do with you?” he asked, propping his head up on one of his hands.

She knew that she had probably said everything she had thought she was just saying in her head out loud and that he was talking about the fact that she couldn’t stop talking about Ray Palmer, but instead just smirked at him.

“Uh, tell me what you are going to do with me,” she said. “I have imagined you doing a lot of different things to me, once you get over all the self-sacrafical act of not being with me.”

Oliver raised his eyebrows. “You fantasized about sex with me?”

Felicity nodded. “I dreamed about that a lot.”

“Well,” Oliver said, nodding, and moved his lips back to the side of her neck. “That is something I can work with. Tell me what you fantasized.”

It was hard focussing on something when he was moving his tongue and lips over her skin, softly biting before soothing the pain. But she knew that if she wanted to have sex with him - and she really did - then she wasn’t allowed to let her thoughts overthink this because this would always lead her right back to R-

Oliver’s hand came down on her mouth hard and his eyes looked at her with a mix of anger and annoyance. Both were eased by the love that was in his eyes as well.

“Felicity, my beloved,” he said sighing, “I want to do this as much as you say you do. And I love your babbling. You can babble as much as you want to. It is actually a hugh turn on, but please, _please_ don’t babble about Palmer.”

She nodded, and Oliver took his hand from her mouth looking at her expectantly. The expression in his eyes changed to confusion, even a little fear when she sat up.

"Open my dress,” she demanded, pulling her ponytail to one side to let him pull down the zipper before sliding the fabric over her head and pulling out the tie from her hair so her blonde curls fell to her shoulders. She wanted to get rid of her shoes, but realized she weren’t wearing any. When did she take them off?

“I thought you said you weren’t thinking that what you did would work,” he said with a smirk when he let his eyes roam over the dark green lace of her underwear, this only clothing she was wearing right now.

“The fact that I didn’t think it would work, doesn’t mean I didn’t hope for it.”

With that being said, he took off her glasses, putting them on the nightstand while she let herself fall back into the pillows and made a ‘come-here’ movement with her index finger. Oliver followed her order right away. He lay his legs between hers that were opened for him and went down on his forearms to have more contact to her skin without pressing all his weight to her tiny body.

“Come nearer,” she whispered, letting her fingers move over his ribcage down to his ass and pressing his lowers body to hers.

They both groaned at the contact. Even with their underwears still between them, it was the closest they’ve ever been. Felicity could feel his erection pressing against her clothed center and arched her back to feel him even more.  
It was exactly like in her dreams.

“Keep doing that,” Olivers whispered to her ear before biting down on her earlobe softly and pulling it into his mouth. “Keep talking about what you fantasized and what you want me to do.”

“I want you to tou-aah!”

She moaned. Oliver hadn’t even waited to let her finish her request. He had sensed what it was she wanted, had pulled the thin lace to the side and had began to slowly stroke her folds. His fingers moving there easily since she was wet already. The skin of his fingers were rough, but his movements gentle.

This wasn’t exactly what she had fantasized. She had fantasized rough sex, hard and fast, but as all her senses were still overwhelmed by the fact that she was finally having sex with Oliver, she was totally okay with this. More than okay actually. She felt the heat coiling in her stomach already.

“Oliver,” she half whispered and half moand while arching her back.

“You want to say something?” Oliver asked grinning, letting his fingers move lower and lower till he reached her center and slid two fingers in before she even got the chance to answer. He started to move them in and out of her hot core achingly slowly.

“Don’t stop,” she begged, moving in synch with his stroking fingers. “God, I love you.”

She moaned even louder when he slid his fingers in harder, letting his thumb ghost over her clit without really touching it. 

“Say it again,” he whispered against her neck where he was now kissing again.

“I love you.”

“Again.”

“I love you. I love you. I lover you, Oliver.”

When the heat was almost unbearable, Oliver finally pressed his thumb down on her clit, making her come right away with a loud cry. She breathed heavily while coming down form her high.

As soon as she opened her eyes she found Oliver smiling at her satisfied while licking her juices from his fingers. She couldn’t say that she had ever seen anything hotter in her life.

“God, that was amazing,” she panted.

“And we just started,” he promised with a smirk.

Felicity responded with a grin of her own, sitting up and climbing into his lap. Again both of them moaned when his clothed erection came in contact with where her panties were wet by now.

While Felicity started to drop kisses from Oliver’s forehead down the side of his face to his stubbled jaw, he opened her bra, letting the lace sink down her arms and putting his hands around her breasts when they were naked. He rubbed his thumbs over her sensitive nipples and his stubble over her chest as soon as her head fell back panting.

This felt so good. It was rough and soft at the same time, giving her exactly what she needed to make her rock against his erection. His erection.

The words drifted through her thoughts and let her hands go down over his chest and abs, stroking the skin there a little longer befor she let her fingers sink lower into his boxers till she reached his already hard length. The second she closed her hands around him, she felt his lips drop from where they were now caressing her breast.

“Felicity,” he moaned and tugged at one of her curles to lower her head towards his face, so he could kiss her. His lips were soft, the movements slow, but Felicity could sense the change. They were going to where this was supposed to go in large steps.

Oliver must have been thinking the same thing because she heard the lace of her panties being ripped apart. She didn’t mind. Everything that was keeping her away fom being joined with Oliver should be destroyed.

“Someone’s becoming a little dramatic here?” Oliver asked against her skin and moaned when her only answer was to pump his cock. “Not that I am complaining.”

She snuggled her cheek against the top of his head and kneaded the back of his neck while rocking her naked body against his erection.

“Take off your boxers,” she whispered into his ear.

Oliver tried to move under her, to take off his boxers without having to let go of her, but it was impossible. He then laid her down into the pillows, climbing out of bed and getting rid of his underwear, leaving him completely naked. He climbed back in bed, settling on top of her without touching her.

“Felicity, breathe,” he laughed quietly, pressing a quick kiss to her nose.

“Where is Thea?” she asked, the words coming so fast they were bearly understandable.

Oliver frowned. “We really need to work on you dirty talking, Felicity,” he said, moving down to press naked skin against naked skin. “Thea is at Verdant. No need to worry, so…”

“Okay, I’m good,” Felicity hurried to say, nodding encouragingly while letting his fingers move up and down his back. “Let’s get this started.”

Oliver chuckled quietly, but nonetheless lowered his face to her neck and sucked at the skin. His fingers travled down from the sides of her breats to her ribs, her waist, her hips and her ass. Before Felicity realized what he was doing she felt the tip of his cock at her entrance. Panting, she arched her back from the bed, pressing more into his body.

“Oliver,” she gasped breathlessly, “please.”

And he followed her request. Slowly he moved his hip forward, sinking into her so deeply it was already making her see stars in front of her closed eyes. He felt incredible inside of her, like he was made for only her.

“Felicity, open your eyes,” he demanded with rough voice. Instead of moving, he stayed settled deep inside of her. “Open your eyes, Felicity.”

It was almost impossible, but somehow she managed to open them, finding that Oliver stared at her with an expression of love, lust and passion she hoped she mirrored the same way.

“Oliver,” she moaned, letting her mouth stay opened. Oliver moved his lips right above hers breathing in her gasps when he started moving slowly.

He raised his hip, letting his cock pull out of her almost completely before sliding back in one quick, hard movement that made her answer with a high-pitched scream. She wrapped her legs around his waist, holding onto his shoulders for dear life.

“Do it again,” she demanded, and he did. Again she let out a short scream. “Again.”

The third time made her body shiver, and Oliver hurried to once again repeat the movement making her fall over the edge a second time. This time she screamed his name loudly and let her short nails scratch down his back, leaving angry, red marks she could see when he lowered his upper body to press his ear to her chest, listening to the sound of her wildly beating heart.

“Oh my god,” she panted, stroking his hair with slightly shaking hands. “This is amazig.”

“It is,” he whispered, snuggling his stubble against her chest. “You need a moment to recover?”

She thought about if for a second, quietly and motionlessly checking her body, then shook her head.

“No, I’m good.”

“Good,” he answered, moving his hip again, this time just a little bit out and then back in, making them both moan, but Felicity was sure she was the one to moan louder.

“Turn around,” she demanded, earning her a questioning look.

“What-?”

“Turn around,” she repeated. “On your back.”

Oliver put his hands to the backsides of her knees, turning around and taking her with him, so she was now lying on top of him, her legs stradling his thighs. Slowly she raised her upper body to sit on top of him. Oliver was looking up at her with an expectant look.

She waited a second, not sure what to do. Of course she knew what to do when in top of a man. It wasn’t her first time she was-

“Felicity, if you’re going back there, I will just roll us back around,” he growled, letting his hands move to her hips, holding them tightly.

“Better I concentrate on my actions then, hm?” she asked with a smirk, putting her hands to his chest to give her some leverage before moving up and then back down with strong, quick movements. Oliver let his head fall back to the pillow and tightened his grip on her hips, helping her move up and down his shaft.

Felicity enjoyed the view of him. He watched her, watched her face like she watched his while she rode him, burying him inside of her deeper with every of her movement downwards and Oliver's movement upwards. He clenched his jaw, his breaths became shorter. She worked him right to the edge, feeling the pleasure inside of herself rise at the same time.

When she started to clench around him, her movements losing rhythm, Oliver switched positions again, sitting up and rolling her over in a move so fast it made her scream. He then put her thighs high on his waist, pounding into her in hard movements that soon pushed her over the edge.

“Oliver!” she screamed, trying to still hold up with his strokes, but finding that she was losing control over her body soon, so instead she just stroked his hair, framed his face with her hands and pulled his head away from her neck, instead letting his forehead rest against hers, watching him holding back his release still.

She softly stroked his cheeks, kissing him quickly before once again closing her legs around his waist and move in synch with him.

She soon found her fourth orgasm building and tightened her arms around his neck whispering into his ear, “Oliver. I love you. I love you. I love you. Oliver.”

Felicity didn’t know what it was that finally made him let go, but when her body started trembling underneath him, her fourth orgasm washing over her, Oliver just pounded into her two more times before screaming out her name.

“Felicity!”

He then colapsed right above her, letting his head fall to her shoulder. They both breathed heavily, trying to catch their breaths, but soon fell asleep the way they were lying there.

* * *

 

Felicity fell silent and quietly thought back to the moment she had fallen asleep underneath him for the first time. His warm body had been pressed against hers, his arms put around her body so tightly it certainly should have been uncomfortable, but instead had just felt comforting.

“Oliver?” she asked quietly when he didn’t say anything, didn’t move. She rose her head to find him staring at the ceiling, his jaw clenched. “Oliver?”

He cleared his throat, but still didn’t look at her.

“That was hot,” he said with rough voice.

Felicity smirked. “Well, since Emmy is finally asleep maybe she will give us enough time to try a repition of that night. I’d be in for that.”

Oliver started grinning. “Well, well, Mrs. Queen. I guess we have plans for tonight then.”


	8. The morning after

“I thought there was a rule that said that babies are not allowed in the Arrow-cave,” Thea said when Felicity came down the stairs. Baby Emmeline was wrapped in a baby sling in front of Felicity’s chest. “I think something was mentioned. Diggle actually said the one time he took Sara she was forced to stay upstairs because Oliver really didn’t want her down here, so he set up the no-baby-rule.”

“There was also a rule about no sex down here,” Felicity said, shrugging her shoulders. “After we broke that one several times, we thought we could easily break a second rule, too. And as we all know we can’t stick with the rule when Oliver and I are supposed to continue working down here.”

Thea noticed with an amused grin that her sister-in-law still managed to blush when she talked about sex. 

“So then where’s Ollie?” she asked instead of teasing Felicity about it.

“Already on patrol. I was going to meet him here before he left, but I had some trouble getting Emmy dressed, so I probably missed him. I guess I will just wait here for him to come back unless he calls me for needing help which he probably won’t do because he’s still trying to proove to me that there is no need for me to come back, but that is a different story. What are you doing here all alone?”

“Waiting for Roy to come back,” Thea said.

“I didn’t know the two of you were…”

“We’re not,” Thea hurried to say, crossing the room to take Emmeline away from the baby sling. She needed something to occupy her hands with and what could be better than holding her little niece. “But maybe we will…”

She saw Felicity lifting her eyebrows while taking off the baby sling and putting it on her desk.

“I don’t want to talk about it yet,” Thea said and waved it aside. “Let’s talk about something different like… Like how the two of us became friends.”

“Funny thing,” Felicity laughed, joining Thea on the couch which was now that there was a baby in the Arrow cave part of the furniture here as well as a crib and some other baby items. “Last week Oliver and I told Emmy the story of how we got together.”

“Poor baby,” Thea whispered, petting Emmeline’s head softly. “Probably traumatized now, right?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “She’s too young to even remember any of this. You and your brother are overprotective.”

“You’re calling me overprotective? You called me twenty times the one night Emmeline slept at my place, and you probably would have called even more times if I hadn’t turned off my phone.”

“That was…” Felicity bit her bottom lip, trying to find an excuse for that. “Didn’t you plan on telling her a story? Let’s do it. Let’s tell Emmy a story.”

* * *

 

Almost never in her life had Thea regretted something more than wondering whether those walls in her penthouse were soundproof. God must have thought he should answer her that question. Turned out they weren’t.

When she had come home around ten o’clock the evening before, everything had been silent up here. She had assumed that Oliver wasn’t home since he barley spent time here. She had made herself a cup of tea to relax a little like she often did before heading to bed. She had sat down on the couch and read in a magazine she had bought earlier that day. Eveything had been so quiet. Maybe too quiet.

The more surprised she had been when she had heard a groan coming from her brother’s room. Thea had jumped from the couch and had run to Ollie’s bedroom door, ready to open it and find her brother hurt and in deep pain when she had heard whispers coming out of it.

“Why do you stop?” - That had been her brother’s voice, just a low whisper.

“I heard something. I think there were footsteps.” - A foreign voice. A femal, foreign voice to be exact.

“No, there weren’t.”

“What if Thea came back?”

“She didn’t? Relax, Felicity, it’s just the two of us.”

“But what if she did? I don’t want her to hear any of this.”

“She didn’t come back,” Oliver repeated. “And if you feel the need to be more quiet just bite down on my shoulder.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Yes, you can.”

“But-”

The woman’s protest was obviously ignored because instead of words the only thing Thea had heard was a passionate moan. 

“I don’t want to hear that,” she had mumbled to herself and headed towards her room, trying to forget what had happened.

Unfortunately, she thought now while stand in the kitchen and making some coffee, the walls had been too thin to hold back the sounds of pleasure that had come out of her brother’s room. Maybe she shouldn’t have said that she was going to spend the night at Laurel’s. She had planned it that way, but… long story. Fact was that she had stayed here.

Thea sipped at her coffee. She had wondered who the girl in her brother’s room was. She had known that it wasn’t Laurel. She had no idea what had happened between the two of them, but Laurel seemed to be very pissed at Oliver. So maybe he had gone back to his playboy life. At least when it came to his sex life. They hadn’t talked about that yet. Since they had other problems like Merlyn and Ra’s they hadn’t had time to discuss those things.

At some point the night she had been prooved right in relation to Laurel. The woman his brother had sex with last night was named Felicity. She had heard him call out her name again and again during the night. It had been gross, and she doubted that she could ever forget the sound of her brother’s moan. They must had had sex at least three times that night.

* * *

 

Felicity bit down on her lip to not correct Thea. It had been more than three times, five times to be exact.

First they had had sex in his bed. Then they had fallen asleep, just for her to wake up by the touch of his lips all over her which had led to a second round in bed and again a little sleep.

Later that night Felicity had woken up in bed alone. She had panicked, thinking Oliver had once again put her down, but had relaxed the second she had heard the sounds from the shower. Slowly she had counted to five and then climbed out of bed to join him in there. There they had held each other for several minutes before they had started the third round.

They had slid back to bed nakedly, once again sleeping a little while, snuggling with each other. When she had woken up that time, she had started kissing him, causing him to move and even in a carless moment to slip out of bed by accident. She had followed him down there and they had once again made love. That time she had taken control of the situation and taken her time to explore each of his scars.

And finally after a couple more hours of sleep they had once again started to kiss and touch in bed. Of course it had ended with the two of them having really, really hot sex and-

“Do I want to know what you are smiling about?” Thea asked, cocking her head to the side.

“No,” Felicity answered smirking. “Just go on with the story.”

* * *

 

Thea sat down on the couch, facing the door to her brother’s bedroom. She wanted to know who the girl was. She got the feeling that she should know who Felicity was. The name was not a frequent one. Nonetheless it was ringing a bell.

What was the name of that one girlfriend that had once visited them in the mansion? Long, dark hair, nice girl. It had been shortly after she had met Roy… It was… No, no. It was Helena. Now she remembered. Her name had been Helena.

Felicity… Felicity… Felicity…

And then she saw it. Thea held her breath when the door to her brother’s bedroom opened, and a pretty blonde sneaked out of the room and into the open gallery, dressed in one of Ollie’s shirts. The woman didn’t seem to sense that she wasn’t alone. She closed the door behind her quietly, almost dancing down the stairs and - freezed.

“Oh crap!” she said, hastily pulling down the shirt to cover more of her naked skin. “Oliver said you weren’t here.”

Thea eyed up the girl, finally figuring out why that name rang a bell.

“Felicity!” she exclaimed happily, getting up and hugging the woman tightly. “You were his EA. I am so happy it is you because that has to mean something and that means Ollie is not going back to sleep around! Yeah!”

She let the blonde get out of the hug, but took her hand and pulled her into the kitchen, where she pushed her in one of the chairs and poured her a cup of coffee that was taken with a smile.

“Thank you,” Felicity said.

“So you and Ollie?”

Felicity smiled shyly, shrugging her shoulders. “I guess.”

“How long is this going?”

“A few hours?”

It came out as a question, but Thea accepted it as an answer.

“Is it serious?”

“I guess?”

Again more a question than an answer, but Thea still didn’t care.

“It’s nice I think. The two of you… I always thought there was something going on between the two of you even before Mom died.”

“There wasn’t. Not really.”

“But the two of you seemed so close. Do you know about…?”

“The Arrow?” Felicity asked, sipping at her coffee. “Yes.”

“Good,” Thea nodded. “So what are we two going to do today? We could go shopping or grab some lunch. We should do something together, get to know each other and do something really normal. We could-”

“First of all,” a male voice came from behind them, “you are scaring her off, Thea. Don’t do that.”

Thea looked at her brother, who stopped behind Felicity, wrapping his arms around her and whispering something in her ear that sounded like “Morning”. His face was lighted by a smile so bright it captured his entire face. Thea wondered whether she had ever seen him that happy since he had returned from the island the first time. Had she ever seen him that happy?

“Secondly, whatever you have planned for the two of you will have to wait.”

“Why?” Thea asked right away. Felicity was the first blink of normality in what seemed like a lifetime.

“That question leads me to the third point,” Oliver said smirking, taking the cup of coffee from his girlfriend’s hands and lifting her up over his shoulder in one smooth move although Felicity yelped in surprise and started kicking with her legs. “You should really leave because I’m not done with her yet, and I will probably have my way with her for a few more hours which means if you don’t want to listen to us having sex, you should go.”

“I already have heard the two of you having sex all night. But since I don’t really need a redo of that, I will just go. Felicity, I will call you.”

“Yes, thank you!” Felicity shouted from the gallery where Oliver had already carried her. “And sorry for your brother being so rude here!”

Thea just smiled when the door fell shot behind the two of them and hurried to get out of the penthouse when she heard the giggles coming from Ollie’s rooms. 

When she was down on the street she smiled happily. Oliver, her beloved but way too serious brother, had found someone to lighten his world. And Thea was kind of sure that that light might even be enough to brighten her life as well.

* * *

 

“And guess what? It was. Your Mommy totally brightened your Daddy’s life and my life. And you, too. You brighten everyone’s life with your cuteness,” Thea told Emmeline.

The baby looked up to her aunt for a second and then wiggled with her arms and legs, smiling brightly.

“Oh my god!” Thea exclaimed. “When did she started to do that?”

Felicity smiled. “She started last week, but just did it when Oliver or I were talking to her. You can be proud. Your the first non-parental person she smiled at like that.”

Thea pressed the little baby to her chest, swaying her back and forth while Emmeline continued to smile.

Felicity observed the two of them, just stoping when she heard footsteps on the stairs. She turned her head to find Oliver and Roy coming down in full vigilante outfit. Diggle and Laurel weren’t with them since they had decided to split the shifts between the four of them, so everyone was able to lead a normal life beside their nighttime activities.

“Hey, there you are,” Oliver said, putting away the bow and coming across the room to press a quick kiss to Felicity’s lips. “Emmy finally agreed to let you put  some clothes on her?”

“I wouldn’t say she agreed,” Felicity shrugged. “There was a lot of screaming coming from her, but she finally fell asleep. Tired out, I guess.”

Oliver nodded and took a step in Thea’s direction, already reaching out for his daughter, but Thea pressed the baby more firmly to her chest and shook her head.

“No, I want to hold her a little longer. She just smiled at me.”

“My daughter, my rules,” he said, almost using his Arrow voice and made a ‘give me the baby’ movement with his hand. “Come on, Thea, give her.”

“No.”

Oliver glanced at his wife, silently asking for help, but Felicity just readjusted her glasses and held up her hands in defense.

“Keep me out of it.”

“Speedy, be nice and give me the baby,” Oliver repeated his request, now fully using his Arrow voice and took another step towards her, but Thea just turned around and started running. Oliver hurried to follow her, quietly cursing his sister for not being carful enough with his beloved daughter.

Felicity watched the siblings wordlessly when Roy sat down on the armrest of the couch and leaned towards her.

“Could you have imagined something like this three years ago?” Roy asked her.

Felicity shook her head without taking her eyes from where Oliver had urged Thea into a corner and was now threatening to take Emmeline away from her, even using force if necessary.

“To be honest,” she sighted, feeling tears in her eyes. “I still can’t.”


	9. Medicine for the heart

“No. No. No, no, no!” he whimpered, holding her dead body to himself and rocking forth and back slightly, just like he did whenever he was putting Emmeline to sleep. His body was shaking and sobs of pain were leaving his mouth while he cried for the woman he still loved so much, lying deadly in his arms, blood all over her tiny, cold body.

He had come home and found her here, lying on the floor, her clothes and hair soaked in her own blood that now was soaking his clothes as well. He couldn’t care less.

All Oliver wanted was for her to open her beautiful blue eyes and smile at him the way she always did. He wanted her to whisper a breathy ‘I love you’ before sliding her arms around his neck and then kiss him senseless.

But she was dead. She didn’t breathe. Her heart had stopped beating. Her body had cooled down. She was dead.

And this time there was no coming back from that. She was gone. For good.

He was never going to see the way her eyes lighten up whenever she saw him again. He was never going to hear her laugh while watching one of her shows again. He was never going to see her lick her lips while he did the salmon ladder again. He was never…

He woke up, panting heavily, at the same time sitting up in bed and trying to catch his breath.

He had been sleeping. But it had felt so real. It hadn’t felt like a dream, more like a memory. A really terrible, terrifying memory.

He reached out to the other side of the bed immediately. The urge to feel Felicity’s warm, breathing body beneath his hands and to pull her to his chest and just feel her was everything he could think about. He needed her. He needed her in his arms right now.

But she wasn’t there. The bed beside him was empty, cold even. No leftovers of bodywarmth on the sheets.

Oliver felt himself panicking. He couldn’t remember having lost Felicity. He couldn’t remember her dying in the real world, but there were still times he woke up from nightmares of the island, bringing back memories he had forgotten a long time ago.

His heartbeat quickened. No! He couldn’t have lost her.

“Felicity!” he yelled as loud as he could, simultaneously jumping out of bed and running out the bedroom in the corridor where he soon found himself bumping into the short tiny blonde he had been searching for in panic.

Oliver grabbed her by the shoulders, holding her at arm’s length to check her body for any harms. The only thing he found was the alarmed expression on her face. Her eyes were wide opened and she looked at him with a panic in them that took hold of it heart and made him pressing her to his chest right away.

He knew he was holding onto her too tightly. He could feel her chest pressing against his arms, trying to take in some breath. Nonetheless he felt her hands running over his back, trying to comfort him.

“Oliver?” she asked in a whisper.

Most of the times he had had a nightmares during the last years it had been enough for Felicity to touch him, to rub her hand over his back or his chest, to stroke his hair or his arm. He had barely even woken up from it. And the rare times he had woken up, he had just pulled Felicity closer and breathed her in till the pain had gone away. Since she had become a part of his life, he had suffered less from those nightmares. She was the perfect medicine for his heart.

Tonight it seemed to be different, though. He felt a longing to connect himself to her, to feel how alive she really was.

So he took two steps until her back war pressed against the wall of the corridor. He slowly raised his head from where it was snuggled to the crook of her neck. He let his lips fall to her cheek, moving them down her throat again and to her collarbone, where he sucked her soft skin till he saw a little bruise forming. He then let his lips travel over his shirt she usually wore to sleep. He sank down on his knees, still letting his lips travel down, down, down. He only stopped when he reached her navel. Slowly he let his hands follow the path of his lips and pulled down her panties, leaving her naked except for her shirt.

When he looked up to her, he saw that she was breathing heavily. Her eyes were filled with lust and passion. They locked eyes while Oliver first lifted one of her feet of the floor, pushing the leg over his shoulder and then repeated the same procedure with the other. Felicity had to grab into his hair to not lose balance.

Oliver let his hands take hold of her hips and then slowly lowered his mouth to her clit. He didn’t close his eyes, instead watched Felicity’s eyes falling shot while moaning in pleasure and arching her back away from the wall to give him better access. 

He opened his mouth against her, drawing little circles with his tounge while sucking the little nub between his lips.

Felicity pressed his head between her legs more firmly. Her eyes were closed, her head fell back against the wall, and her mouth opened slightly. He sucked again, letting his teeth scratch over the sensitive skin. It had exact the effect he had hoped for. Felicity gasped, bit down on her bottom lip and then wetted her full lips with her tongue.

He did again, making her moan his name.

“Oliver.”

The sound echoed through the dark, empty corridor.

She was close. He knew it from the way her hips began to move faster against his mouth, wanting him to give her the release she needed. And he did.

Oliver knew how to make his wife come. He sucked her skin again, his tongue playing with her clit, and she tightened the hold she had on his hair, screaming in pleasure, but soon pressing her hands to her mouth to muffle the sounds of passion and lust. Oliver continued to eat her out, letting his tongue slide between her folds and taking in her wetness.

She tasted sweet like always. And she was alive. The tremble of her body, the sounds out from her mouth and so much more prooved it.

Oliver looked up to her again. Felicity had come down from her high and was now looking at him with a loving smile on her lips. He wanted to kiss those lips, to press her against the wall once again and-

He finally realized that he was still holding onto her hips tightly. His fingers were pressing into the soft skin way to hard. She must be in pain he figured. She must be in pain and hadn’t say anything.

With one swift move he put her back to the floor. Not able to react when she wobbled, her legs refusing to carry her after her orgasm, he mumbled that he needed a shower and then went away.

He let his boxers fall to the floor and slipped into the large shower, turning on the hot water and let it wash all over him.

Why didn’t he feel better? Why couldn’t he shake the feeling of her dead body in his arms? Why wouldn’t the pain and panic go away?

Oliver let out a sound, half sigh and half sob, leaned his hands against the cold tile and held his head bowed between them.

He hadn’t lost her. Not this time. Years ago he almost had. No, not almost, he corrected himself. He had lost her to another man, but he had managed to get her back, mainly because she had just taken what she had wanted. Ever since he had tried to chase away every thought of losing her. Losing her meant dying himself, and he couldn’t allow himself to even think about that. Oliver knew that.

It wasn’t untill he felt two arms wrap around him from behind, a head snuggling into his back and two hands roaming over his chest that he noticed her presence. Still he stayed in the same position.

“Oliver?” she asked quietly.

He clenched his jaw. Ever since they were married he hadn’t shut her out anymore and even before that he had let her in as far as he could. But everything felt different tonight. He didn’t want her here, didn’t want the tiny, little blonde with all her innocence and goodness here. He knew it was stupid. Felicity was more than that. Felicity was strong and not as fragile as most people might think from looking at her, but…

“Go away,” he grumbled, his voice low.

Felicity didn’t even wince. She just tightened the hold she had on him and pressed a kiss on his back, waiting for him to open up to her.

But Oliver didn’t want to open up to her. Not now.

“Please go away,” he said, hoping the little extra word might help. “I can’t talk right now.”

“Then don’t talk,” Felicity suggested, letting her hands drift lower till they gripped his cock, stroking the length gently with her soft hands. Seeing her come, feeling her come all over his mouth had make him hard already.

Oliver moaned, nonetheless he straightened up and pushed her hands away. He turned around to her slowly, framing her face with his hands and pressing a kiss to her forehead. Way too soon for Felicity he let his hands fall back down and away from her.

“I can’t do that right now, either. I’m just going to hurt you,” he explained, lowering his gaze to her hips where the marks of his fingers already started forming. “Please go back to bed. We will talk tomorrow.”

“You’re not going to hurt me,” Felicity whispered, but Oliver didn’t react. “Do you want me here?”

Oliver formed his hands to fists. “I want you here, but I can’t have you here. Now please leave.”

But instead of leaving - when had Felicity ever left him he wondered? - she put his hands on his chest, letting her lips follow and peppering kisses to his wet skin. Oliver stayed still. He knew he was going to hurt her, and he didn’t want that.

“Come on, Oliver,” she whispered against his chest. Her hands slid around his neck, her teeth bit down on his shoulder lightly. “We’ve had sex before.”

“I don’t want sex right now,” he growled. “Please go.”

But Felicity didn’t leave. She just kissed his Bratva-tattoo and moved her hands to his hair so she could pull his head down to her. Their faces were just a breath away from each others. She locked eyes with him.

“You don’t want sex?” she asked. “Fine. So just fuck me.”

Although her voice was strong, he could see the blush running over her face. The red color revealed that she was not as confident about this as she tried to make him believe. At the same time Oliver knew that she wouldn’t have offered if she hadn’t meant it.

Still he shook his head.

Those last two weeks they had had sex several times. Unless most people might think, it hadn’t been unbearable not having sex with her. On the other hand he was more than happy to have sex with her again. It was great. He loved it. He had been trying to be as gentle as possible, but he hadn’t minded. He loved having gentle sex with her. Who was he trying to fool? He loved sex with her no matter how they did it.

Just tonight he really felt like he couldn’t be gentle. The sight of her dead body had imprinted on his mind, and the anger he felt wasn’t easy to just ignore. So as soon as he would touch her, he knew it was going to get rough. Maybe too rough just seven weeks after giving birth.

“Fuck me, Oliver,” she repeated huskily.

He could almost see her rolling her eyes when he still refused to move. If he hadn’t been in such a bad mood, he probably would have laughed, but he just stayed still. It wasn’t until a familiar smirk ran over her face that he frowned.

“Felicity, what-?”

Instead of telling him again what he shoud do, Felicity just jumped up, wrapping her arms around his neck more tightly and closing her legs around his hips in the process. Oliver’s eyes widened, surprised of her wildness since Felicty used to remind him that most accidents were happening in the bathroom whenever he touched her in the shower, and before he could realize what was happening here, Felicity already began rubbing her wet center against his aching member.

Her lips fell to his ear, biting down softly. “Come on, Oliver. You’re naked and hard. I’m naked and wet. Don’t make me do this all on my own. We both know you really, really, really want to just press me against the cold pillar and fuck me. So just do it. Fuck me. Fuck me.”

And Oliver just couldn’t control himself any longer. In a swift move he pressed her back against the cold pillar like she had suggested. He grapped her hair with his right hand, pulling her face to him to kiss her roughly, biting down on her lip with a little more force than usually. His left hand moved between her folds, testing whether she was still wet from her last orgasm. She was.

So he gripped his cock and guided it to her entrance.

“Tell me to stop,” he growled. “Tell me to stop now, Felicity.”

But she just shook her head and repeated, “Fuck me, Oliver.”

And he did. He slid home in one move, pressing his hips against hers hard untill her ass was pressed against the cold pillar.

They both moaned in each other’s mouth. Felicity gripped his hair and kissed him, muffling her moans everytime his hip snapped into hers with a force he couldn’t describe different than violent. But Felicity didn’t seem to mind. If anything she was enjoying it.

When Oliver put his hands on the pillar to both sides of her head to slide in and out of her even faster and harder she just moaned louder. His name falling from her lips over and over again while her head fell back to the wall, her eyes screwing shut.

She was close. She was clenching around him already, but he wasn’t done with her yet and as selfish as it seemed, he didn’t want her to come right now. He wanted to come with her. So he pulled away and out of her, lowering her to the floor.

“Oliver?” she asked, looking at him in confusion.

He framed her face with his hands, kissing her till she was breathless before turning her around so her back was pressing against his chest her breasts pressing against the pillar. Her right cheek was resting on the wall and Oliver lowered his face to rest his forehead against her temple, so he could feel her breathing on his chin.

Slowly he slid back in, moving one hand over hers that was resting on the wall while he started to move in and out of her in slow, hard moves that made slapping sounds whenever their hips met.

“Oliver,” she whispered, closing her fingers around his hand and bending her head back just a little bit more so she could rest it on his shoulder and kiss his stubble.

The hot water was crackling down on them while the speed of their movements increased. Oliver felt heat coiling in his body. She was so much tighter like this, and as much as he tried to hold back, to make her come first before letting go himself, he knew he wasn’t going to make it much longer.

So he moved the hand that Felicity wasn’t gripping like her whole life depended on it over her hip and to her clit, rubbing little circles there. He turned his head, locking eyes with her while their pleasure increased till they both couldn’t take it any longer.

Felicity screamed. Her head fell against his shoulder and her body trembled in his strong arms. He took all her weight when her legs refused to carry her any longer and while she was still lost in her pleasure, he allowed himself to push into her three more times with a hardness he normally never needed. Then he let go, squeezing her hand and letting his lips fall to her mouth that was opened slightly. Grunting, he came inside of her.

They stayed like this for several minutes, their left hands squeezig each others while their right hands were joined at her sex. Different than a few moments ago Oliver wasn’t pressing her against the wall, instead holding her to himself as tightly as possible.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” she answered.

They stayed silent for a while and only let go of each other when little Emmeline’s cries became louder. They left the shower, both wrapping towels around their bodies, and while Oliver left to take care of Emmeline, Felicity stayed in their bedroom, wondering what could have gotten under Oliver’s skin.

She knew he barely had nightmares anymore. He was happier, more light-hearted and almost like completely at peace with his past. Whatever it was that had happened in his dreams tonight must have been really bad.

Oliver turned up in the bedroom again, Emmeline cuddled into his arms. He was standing in the door frame, watching her like she was about to disappear. So Felicity stood and walked towards him, snuggling to his side till he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss on the top of her head.

“Are we going to talk about what happened tonight?”

“We are,” he answered, lifting her chin with one of his fingers. “Are you okay?”

“I had two mindblowing orgasms. I am more than okay,” she admitted, even making him smile. “So… what brought this on?”


	10. Jealousies

“You know, this was exactly what I needed today,” Oliver told her and pressed a soft kiss to the top of Felicity’s head that was resting on his upper arm while he kept pushing the stroller down the sidewalk. “Thank you.”

Felicity sighed quietly and closed her eyes. “Never mind. To be honest it had less to do with what you needed and more with what I needed. I missed you.”

She had missed him since the second he had left the bed in the morning. It was ridiculous, but those last days she had gotten used to him being there with her every single second of the day, and it had just felt wrong that he hadn’t been there while she had eaten her breakfast or when she had prepared lunch. After their little night activity last week Oliver had decided to take some days off and had pushed it to the limit untill his EA had called him yesterday and insisted for him to come back.

So she had spent her first morning without him in a week staring at the clock to make the time pass faster and waiting for him to come back. It had been pathetic.  
And when Felicity just hadn’t been able to take it any longer, she had grabbed Emmeline and driven to QC to visit her husband, and they had decided to head to one of the coffee shops.

“I’ve been barely away and you’ve missed me already?” Oliver asked with a slight chuckle that could not hide the love and adoration he felt about her confession.

Felicity looked up to him, but just as she was going to answer, the expression in his face changed. He clenched his jaw, and the soft features in his face hardened. Alarmed by the Arrow-like face he had put on, Felicity followed the direction of his gaze immediately.

“Ray,” she said, unsure whether she should be happy to see a friend or worried because of the tense relationship of her ex-boyfriend and her husband.

“Felicity,” he said with a smile and stepped forward to press a soft kiss to her cheek. “It’s nice to see you.”

Immediately Oliver’s arm slid around her waist and pulled her towards him in a possessive move.

“Oliver, nice to see you, too,” Ray turned to Oliver, offering him a hand that Oliver shook. Considering the changes in Ray’s face, Felicity knew for sure that Oliver used a lot more force than necessary, but Ray did his best to not show that.

“That must be the little Miss Queen, I guess,” he said, taking a look in the stroller and smiling at Emmeline. “She is beautiful. How old is she?”

“Nine weeks,” Felicity answered. She tried her best not to get any more worried when she felt Oliver tense at her side and pulling her even closer to him. “She is really sweet. At least as long as she isn’t crying in the middle of the night.”

“I’m really happy for you. For both of you,” Ray added with a serious gaze towards Oliver, who only stared back blankly. “I gotta go. It was nice to see you again, Felicity. Oliver.”

When Ray left, Felicity turned her head to Oliver.

“Let’s go inside,” he said, not looking at her.

The next second he let go of her hip and entered the coffee shop. Felicity rolled her eyes before she followed him to the table he had picked for them.

“You know, it really is ridiculous that you are still jealous of him, right?” Felicity asked, sitting down on the other side of the table while Oliver put Emmeline down in his lap. “Ray and I broke up years ago and the two of us got together, got married and even became parents. Your possessiveness is annoying.”

Oliver opened his mouth to answer, but stopped himself when the waitress approached.

“What can I get you?” she asked, offering a bright smile that lingered way too long on Oliver’s face.

“Coffee and chocolate cake,” Oliver answered.

“Same,” Felicity added and watched her leave, not before smiling at Oliver once again. “You know, I could be jealous, too. I mean she looks at you like you are a piece of meat. It is disgusting.”

“Yes, but I didn’t sleep with her.”

“Oh, you’re sure about that?” Felicity asked, becoming more and more angry with every word. “I bet you can’t name every girl you had sex with in your pre-island time.”

She knew it was kind of a cheap shot, and she could also see the hurt in his face, but Felicity was that angry that she still couldn’t stop herself from going on.

“Besides, you can’t really use the fact that I slept with Ray against me because as far as I remember the only reason I did that was because someone else had his head up in his ass. If it had been up to me, we would have been together for months at that time.”

They glared at each other in pure anger.

“You know what,” Felicity continued after a while. “I didn’t come here to fight with you, so either we will stop, or I just take Emmeline and go back home.”

“I’m going to wash my face,” Oliver announced, standing up and giving Emmeline to Felicity. “I’ll be back.”

Felicity looked after him while he headed to the rest room. She shook her head with a sigh and kissed the top of Emmeline’s face.

“Let me tell you something, my dear,” she whispered to her daughter. “Your Daddy has a serious issue with his jealousy. You know, before you were born, at a time when he loved me, but refused to be with me, he still felt like it was okay to be this possessive. He didn’t want to be with me, and he didn’t want me to be with anyone else, either.”

She thought about his reaction when she had started to see Barry and his jealousy of Ray Palmer that had been even worse.

“You know, when your uncle John got married to aunt Lyla,” she continued, her eyes going blank, thinking back to the day of their friends’ wedding, “your daddy watched me all day. It really was annoying because I was there with Ray, the guy you met a few minutes ago. I was with him at that time even though I was not in love with him. I wasn’t. Not really. It was just that you daddy was being… let’s just say he made a lot of bad decisions, so I decided, and I decided not to wait any longer for him to be with me. And then there was Ray, and he said all the right things, made me feel precious and important.  
And then I catched the bouquet which means that I was the one going to get married next, and I looked at your daddy, and he looked back at me with a mix of happiness and panic.”

Felicity remembered his face very well. When she had asked him about that look a few month later, he had said that the thought of her getting married had made him happy untill he had realized that he probably wasn’t going to be the one she’d married.

“Your daddy has jealousy issues, Emmy,” Felicity repeated with a sigh. “But I guess I should be happy about it, right? At least it means he still loves me very, very much.”

She rested her cheek on the top of her daughter’s head and closed her eyes.

Oliver’s mood in those days when she had been with Ray had been worse than at any other time. The whole team had been affected by it. It had become the most terrible when Ray had started to be the Atom and had gotten in Oliver’s way. It had been-

She was pulled back to the present when a pair of lips were pressed to hers, kissing her softly, and a hand cupped the back of her head. Felicity opened her mouth. Oliver’s tongue stroked over hers before pulling back. His lips broke from hers.

Slowly she opened her eyes to find Oliver cowering at her side, smiling at her in apology. His thumb stroked over her cheek. His other hand played with Emmeline’s foot.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, pecking her lips again shortly. “Forgive me?”

Felicity locked eyes with him. “I’m sorry, too. I know I was mean.”

“Maybe a little,” Oliver grinned, kissing the top of her head while straightening and taking Emmeline away from her again.

As soon as he sat down, the waitress came back, serving their coffees and pieces of cake.

“Honestly, she is undressing you with her eyes,” Felicity growled when they were alone again.

“Oh, and that isn’t jealousy?” Oliver chuckled.

“No,” Felicity answered, taking a sip from her coffee. “That is protecting what is mine.”

“Hey, I’m doing the same thing when I pull you a little closer everytime a guy is looking at you that way.”

“No, Oliver,” Felicity sighted with a chuckle, “that is jealousy.”


	11. Distraction

“If you don’t stop doing that, I will probably cut off my fingertips,” Felicity said only half jokingly, not stopping to chop up the paprika.

“Don’t worry,” Oliver chuckled. “I will take the knife away from you before you get hurt. I’m not going to let you hurt yourself.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered, leaning back against his chest and tilting her head to the side to give him better access to her neck he had started kissing and sucking at as soon as she had started to prepare their dinner.

Oliver put his hands to her hips, rubbing small circles with his thumbs. Meanwhile his lips moved up on the skin of her neck till they reached the soft spot right beneath her ear. It made Felicity sigh quietly. Her eyes screwed shut, and her head pressed against his lips.

“You’re always distracting me,” she said before she sighed again. “Dinner will never be ready. And I still think I will lose parts of my body.”

Again Oliver chuckled, not taking his lips from her skin.

“I’m always distracting you, hm?” he asked, pulling her earlobe between his teeth and biting down. His tongue ran over the skin, easing the pain. “How about you and your short skirts?”

“They are not that short,” Felicity stated.

Oliver moved his hands along the hem of her skirt. It ended in the middle of her thigh. The contact made Felicity shiver.

“Not that short?” Oliver asked with a chuckle.

"Maybe a little short,” Felicity admitted honstly. “But it is nothing compared to you doing the salmon ladder.”

“Well, the salmon ladder was made to distract you in the first place.”

Felicity let go of the knife and turned around in Oliver’s arms to slide her hands around his neck and kiss him softly. Her lips let go of his way to short for Oliver’s taste. 

“You had the salmon ladder before you met me.”

“Yeah, but I was just trying to make it look as easy as possible before I invited you down in the basement to show you. I wanted to look hot for you.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Firstly, I am sure that you didn’t start doing the salmon ladder to look hot for me. Secondly, I am sure that you hadn’t planned on inviting me down to the Arrow cave at any point which leads to my last point. You didn’t invite me down there at any point. You were bleeding in my car.”

Oliver nodded. “At least the third part was right.”

“Liar,” she whispered smiling.

“So…” Oliver pressed a short kiss to her lips before pulling back with a smirk on his face. “You’re punishing me for it?”

“Oh, I will, Mr. Queen,” Felicity said and leaned her lips against his ear. “I will punish you.”

“And what are you planning on doing?” Oliver asked huskily.

“I will banish you from the kitchen,” she said, pulling back and turning him around at his shoulders, pushing him out of the open kitchen.

“What? No! I wanted to help you cook,” Oliver pouted.

“No, you were just distracting. So… You are allowed to come back when I tell you, but not before that.”

“Then what am I going to do all that time without you?”

Just as she had been waiting for this very moment, Emmeline started crying.

“There you have your answer,” Felicity said, shrugging her shoulders while going back backwards. “Have fun, spending time with your other favorite girl.”

Oliver watched Felicity going back to kitchen before shighing and heading to Emmeline’s nursery. God, he loved his girls.


	12. Nicknames

 "I think she needs a nickname.“

Felicity looked up from her tablet and at her sister-in-law, who sat with little Emmeline in her lap on the floor. Oliver threw the papers he had been working on for the last few hours on the couch table and likewise looked at his sister.

"She has a nickname,” Oliver said. “And the only reason she got it was because you called her Emmy so often that we were kind of infected by it.”

“Come on, Emmy is just a short form, but I think she needs a real nickname, you know? Like you always called me Speedy.”

“You hate that nickname,” Felicity and Oliver chorused and smiled at each other, noticing it. Sometimes it was like they were thinking the exact same thing at the exact same time.

“Hey, your focus is needed here,” Thea said, making Oliver and Felicity break their gazes from each other. “Emmy needs a real nickname.”

“We are not a nickname family,” Oliver stated.

“And we don’t even like short names. You just got away with it because my hormons lulled me.”

“Oh yeah, I remember the conversation about your short names. Totally crazy,” Thea said, rolling her eyes and lifting Emmeline from her lap to bring her face in one line to her own. “Your parents are totally crazy when it comes to nicknames. I tell you the story.”

Oliver and Felicity looked at each other over Thea’s head, grinning at each other. Felicity put her tablet aside and hurried around the table to cuddle up to her husband, who pulled her closer to his chest and leaned back into the back rest of the couch.

“So, tell the story Thea,” Felicity asked with a smile.

* * *

 

“So what else could I tell you about Ollie?” Thea thought out loud while placing the cup of coffee in front of Felicity.

“Oh, I think you already told me a lot about your brother,” Felicity said and smiled shyly. “I think we should leave it with that. I think telling me about every embarressment in his life is not gonna make Oliver happy, so…”

“What is not going to make me happy?” Oliver asked, entering the penthouse.

Felicity winced and put her hand to her heart, making Thea laugh. Had she really not heard him?

“God, Oliver! Do you have to sneak up behind me all the time?” Felicity asked. “One day I’m going to have a heart attack.”

Oliver approached with a bright smile that surely made Felicity’s heart pound even faster if that was possible. Since they had come together a week ago, he had smiled at her like that every single day, and Thea was starting to get used to his brother’s happiness.

“Oh, I won’t risk that. Let me make it up to you,” Oliver said. He stood right in front of her, cupped her face with boths hands and kissed her softly.

Felicity sighed, relaxed against him and grabbed the front of his dark blue henley shirt with both hands.

“Guys, I am really happy for you, but could you please not do that in front of me?” Thea whined.

“Then go away,” Oliver suggested without moving his lips too far away from Felicity’s.

“It’s her home,” Felicity whispered and blushed. “You can’t tell her to go away.”

“Yeah, Ollie!” Thea nodded, frowning just shortly when Felicity winced again. “Listen to Lissy. She is a smart woman.”

Oliver let his hands sink, resting them on Felicity’s waist. He looked at Thea like she had just said the silliest thing in the world. He had his brow furrowed and his lips pursed.

“How did you just call her?” Oliver asked his sister.

“Lissy,” Thea answered, smiling at her new won friend. “You know, a short form of her name because Felicity is a really long name with a lot of syllables. So I shortened it. Lissy for Felicity like Ollie for- okay, why are you wincing everytime I say Ollie? Ha, again!”

Thea had interrupted herself as soon as she had seen that Felicity had winced again. She had observed that woman’s behavior during the last days, and she had realized that everytime she was talking about her brother as Ollie or even called him like that Felicity had winced like someone had just pricked her with a needle.

“I don’t like it when people call him Ollie,” Felicity answered, saying her boyfriend’s short form of name like she was chewing on a gross insect someone had forced her to eat.

“Yeah, and I don’t like it when anyone gives nicknames to her.”

“It is not a nickname. It is a short form,” Thea insisted. “There is a difference.”

“I don’t care,” Oliver said. “Don’t call her that or anything other than Felicity.”

Thea lifted her hands in surrender. “Fine. She’s your girlfriend. She never had a short form of her name, so she won’t get one now. I get it. But what about your problem with Ollie?”

She younger Queen almost rolled her eyes when Felicity again winced and her brother began to rub small circles on his girlfriend’s back like she needed comfort.

“It’s just… This short form is so… pre-island, you know? It’s like there a two different individual. There was Ollie who was this playboy guy who screwed around a lot, even cheating on his girlfriend and… who wasn’t able to accept any responsibility. And then the island happened and he became a different person. He… I don’t know. It just feels wrong to still call him Ollie.”

Thea looked at Felicity and then at her brother who himself looked at Felicity like she was his sun. He looked at her like she had just told him she loved him for the first time. So Thea was sure that Felicity had a point.

For Thea it was just different. From her point of view her brother was still her brother in some things and one of those things was the relationship she had with him. The Ollie she had followed around most of her childhood was still the same Oliver who now saved the city. For her he was still her hero. Her brother.

Just as she was going to explain exactly this, Oliver lifted Felicity from her seat and threw her over her shoulder like he had the first morning Felicity had been here. Different than that time Felicity didn’t scream. Instead she just laughed. Those last days she had probably gotten used to Oliver carrying her like that.

“Excuse us, Thea,” Oliver said while heading to his room already. “I really need to tell Felicity how much I appreciate her opinion.”

Thea watched them. Yes, Ollie was so much happier since the morning Felicity had been here first. And that really, really, really made her happy.

* * *

 

“I like that story,” Felicity said.

“I like what happened after that story,” Oliver smirked.

“Urgh!” Thea said, pressing Emmeline to her chest. “There is a baby present!”

“A baby that is a result of something like that happening,” Oliver added.

“Although this something almost didn’t happen because a certain someone wanted to take things slow,” Felicity mumbled against his chest sleepyly.

Thea frowned. “What? You wanted to take things slow, Ollie? That doesn’t sound like you.”

“I-”

“He wanted to take things slow after our first night together,” Felicty interrupted before her husband got the chance to say something.

“That sounds more like my brother. You gotta tell me that story, Felicity.”

“It was-”

“Not now,” Oliver whispered in Felicity’s hair. “You’re tired. Sleep a little. You can tell that story sometime.”

“I will remind you,” Thea assured her sister-in-law to her brother’s disapproval. “That is a story I really want to hear.”


	13. Voting

When Oliver came downstairs after his shower, he found Felicity sitting on the couch and working on her tablet with three months old Emmeline sitting in her lap.

“It’s sunday. You shouldn’t work,” he said, sitting down next to her. He tried to take away her tablet, but Felicity noticed his intentions just soon enough to hold it out of his reach.

“Hey, this is important!” she shouted, moving to the other end of the couch, so Oliver couldn’t even get near her tablet. “If you want to help, you just take my back up tablet and join me.”

Oliver lifted his eyebrows. “Since when can I help you with your IT work?”  
And since when was he allowed to even come near one of her babies?  
One of her babies that wasn’t Emmeline.

“Hm?” she asked without looking up. Whatever she was doing there seemed to need all her focus.

“Okay, what are you doing there?” Oliver laughed and crawled to her side of the couch, pulling both of his girls into his lap, so he could look at Felicity’s shoulder when he rested his chin on her shoulder. “TV’s Top Couple?”

“Yes,” Felicity answered while voting nonstop for always the same pairing. “It’s simple. There are always two couples against each other. You click on your favorite pairing and vote. Well, you can do that for every of the duells, but since you probably don’t know any of the couples, it’s enough if you choose this one.”

She pointed to her tablet and the two names she chose with every click. Oliver had no idea who they were.

“What is the fun in this?” he asked, almost shying at the short glance Felicity directed at him before focussing on her tablet again.

“The fun? The fun? Well, firstly, you know that you’re not the only one that hopes they will finally be together. Secondly, the actors of the winning pairing will be inteviewed together and thirdly, mabye when we win, the writers will finally see that we as the fandom really want them to be together.”

Oliver looked at her in amusement. “Why don’t you just hack the website if this is so imporantant to you?”

“Because that wouldn’t be fair,” she mumbled before pumping her first in the air. “Great! We got 0.1 point. We just teamed up together with a different fandom. We vote for them, they vote for us.”

“What if your couples will have to fight against each other in the next voting round?”

Felicity shrugged. “Don’t care. We need to get through this round first. I still don’t see you voting on my back up tablet.”

“I think I will just take Emmeline and cuddle a little with her, so we can leave you with you super important work here.”

Slowly, way too slowly Felicity raised her head and looked at him severly.

“Oliver, do you ever want to have sex again?” she asked.

“You’re blackmailing me now?” he laughed only half amusedly since he was sure Felicity would do this.

“No,” Felicity said with a smirk. “I’m just saying you have two options here. You can refuse to help me and risk that I will be in a very bad mood these next days ,so I probably won’t feel like having sex, or you could grab my tablet, cuddle with Emmeline while voting simultaneously and be rewarded for being a super supportive husband with super hot sex with me tonight.”

Oliver nodded. “Where do you keep your back up tablet again?”

“In my nightstand,” Felicity smiled.

“I’ll be back in a second,” Oliver assured, kissing her on the lips shortly before hurrying upstairs to get the tablet.

“See, Emmeline,” Felicity whispered while she kept voting. “That is why it’s good to be a girl.”


	14. Taking things slow?

“He’s now heading right into Lincoln Street. Take the next street to the right and then the second to the left,” Felicity directed Oliver over the comm. “Then you might get him.”

“A little more trust in my abilities here, please,” Oliver chuckled lightly.

“Oh, I don’t doubt your abilities,” Felicity assured him. “It’s just know that he got the better motorcylce.”

“Well, if you had let me buy a new one-”

“I probably would have been a widow already, and I don’t intend to be anytime soon, so you better focus on your high speed chase.”

“I’m multitasking.”

“That wakes old memories,” she smiled. “He must be right in front of you now.”

“Okay, got him. Digg?”

Felicity watched the blue point settle right in front of the purple one that again was right in front of the green point, meaning Oliver and John had the guy who just stole a bunch of weapons surrounded from two sides now and when shortly after a black point appeared on the right side of the purple one and a red point on its left, Felicity knew that the guy had lost.

It was the first time since Emmeline was born that everyone was on duty together. It had been necessary to catch that guy. He had been really clever, but just not clever enough.

“Okay, we got him,” Diggle said after a while. All points on the screen stopped moving.

“I’ll call my dad,” Laurel suggested, but her words were drowned by the low cry behind Felicity.

“Was that Emmeline?” Oliver asked.

“No,” Felicity answered, rolling her eyes. “That was a baby I found while you guys where catching the bad guy. I took it down here and decided to raise it on my own.”

“I thought Thea was supposed to watch her,” Roy interrupted, probably not interested in hearing another fight between his married coworkers.

“She is. She is watching her down here.”

“I thought I made myself clear about-”

“I’m just going to hang up now,” Felicity interrupted her husband, ignored his protest and broke the contact.

“Brave,” Thea said behin her. “Ollie is probably going to be really mad at you for this.”

‘This’ probably meaning letting Thea down in the Arrow-cave where Oliver didn’t want to see her anymore since she got hurt on a mission. It had just been a little bruise, but Oliver as her big brother had been really mad and worried.  
And it probably also referred to her hanging up the phone in the middle of a conversation.

Felicity shrugged. “He can try to be mad at me, but let me tell you something. I’m so much better at being mad at him than he is at being mad at me.”

Thea laughed and sat down on the couch, cuddling Emmeline to her chest. “Yes, I know that.”

Felicity joined her sister-in-law, rubbing over her daughter’s back without taking her from Thea. She knew how much Thea loved to spend time with her niece.

“He will let you go on a mission again soon,” Felicity promised.

Thea sighed. “I’m not so sure about that.”

“Trust me,” Felicity assured. “I’m already working on it, and Oliver just can’t resist when I’m asking him for something, especially when I am so right and he is so wrong.”

“Speaking of,” Thea grinned, holding Emmeline even more tightly when the baby was staring to fall asleep. “Wasn’t there a story about Ollie wanting to take things slow after your first night together?”

“Oh, yes,” Felicity chuckled. “It was the evening after our first night.”

* * *

 

Things between her and Oliver were just amazing. Well, every couples’ time was probably amazing when they weren’t even 24 hours into their relationships. But Felicity didn’t care that in the beginning most relationships were amazing because she was kind of sure that hers and Oliver’s were even more amazing than amazing. It was perfect or even perfecter. The perfectest of all relationships.

She was so deep into her thoughts that it took her at least a minute to realize that Oliver had bent down right in front of her, one arm to each side of her chair, fondly smiling at her.

“Oh,” she said as soon as her eyes could focus on his face. “You’ve been saying something?”

Oliver chuckled. “What have you been thinking about?”

Felicity leaned forward, kissing him softly. She let her lips linger right above his before leaning back again and smiling at him.

“Does that answer your question?”

“I have a notion, but I think I need a little more explaining.”

His smile was spread all over his face, and all Felicity could do was smiling back at him and once again leaning forward to kiss him.

“Okay, this is gross!” Roy called out behind them. “Go get a room or something.”

Felicity hurried to lean back while Oliver just grinned when he saw the blush on her face.

“Come on. We’re going home,” he suggested, holding out a hand to her that Felicity took in hers.

“My home or your home?” she asked, while walking to the stairs on his side.

“Too much information!” they heard Roy call after them.

They decided to go to the penthouse. Oliver had kicked Thea out although he insisted that all he had done was proposing to her that she might spend the evening with Laurel like she had originally planned for the last night.

It took them almost half an hour to get there since Felicity refused to get on the bike, and Oliver just looked so ridiculous in her mini cooper that she had been unable to drive, laughing so hard that tears had run over her cheeks.

As soon as the door had fallen closed behind them, Felicity slid her arms around Oliver’s neck and kissed him passionately which he responded to by pulling her closed to his chest and kissing her back. Soon they both felt like they needed air. So their lips broke apart, but their foreheads stayed in touch.

Being around him all day had been crazy. The butterflies she had been able to ignore since he had come back from the dead had taken over all her body. She had even felt them in her toes when ever he had just looked at her. Not kissing him had felt like almost impossible, but Felicity had known that she had to keep herself in control. Diggle and Roy surely wouldn’t have been too pleased if they had let all their feelings for each other shown right in front of them.  
Nobody could be that happy for a couple.

Felicity had started to play with the first button of Oliver’s dark blue henley and just thought about unbottoning it when Oliver suddenly pulled away.

“How about we grab some dinner? You must be hungy.”

Before she was even able to react, he had moved away from her and gone to the kitching. She watched him taking a look in the fridge and pursing his lips on what he was finding there.

“Well, looks like I really need to go shopping. So… How about a glass of wine and take-out? There’s a Chinese restaurant right around the corner and-”

Oliver stopped. Felicity had approached him quietly, had slid her arms around his torso and snuggled her face into his back. He tensed shortly before relaxing fully into her arms. He sighed happily. His hands came to rest on her forearms.

“You know,” Felicity whispered after a while. Her arms slid up to the buttons of his henley again. “I’m not that kind of hungry.”

But again before she could unbutton them, Oliver just grabbed her hands and pulled them away, causing her to sigh in frustration.

“Oh, come on!” she pouted. “The last time we had sex was at least ten hours ago. Let’s just have sex and then eat dinner.”

Oliver turned around to her, his face so serious that it caused her heart to beat faster. It was kind of the exact same expression in it like in the hospital when he had been telling her that he couldn’t be Oliver Queen and the Arrow.

“Oh my god,” she whispered huskily. “Are you breaking up with me? Because you look like you’re breaking up with me. You look like you are going to say that this was a mistake, and we shouldn’t-”

She was interrupted when his lips closed over hers, kissing her with as much passion as she had when they had entered the apartment a few minutes ago. His hands grabbed her hips, pulling her closer and keeping her pushed right to his chest.

“Does that answer your question?” he asked then.

Felicity smirked. “I got a notion, but I could use some more explanation.”

Oliver chuckled, but followed her request and kissed her again. Kissing him felt so great. Him kissing her felt so great.

When their lips broke apart this time, Oliver slid his arms around her waist, keeping her close to him, but his head leaned back enough to look at her.

“I’m not breaking up with you. I just think that we should take things slow between us. I don’t want to rush anything. I love you,” he said wih a smile and tucked one of her blond curls behind her ear. “I love you, and that means that I am very serious about it. So I think we should take things slow, you know?”

Felicity looked at him. His words were so cute. He wanted to do this right and that meant slow for him.

“Oliver, we  had sex a lot of times last night. I think it is a little late for that,” she whispered, one finger sliding over his chest. “Besides, considering our history I think even slugs are doing things more quickly than we are.”

“I am serious about this, Felicity,” he said, cupping her face with his hands. “I love you, and I want to make sure that you know how much I mean this.”

He kissed the tip of her nose before pulling away completely and pouring the wine he had found in the fridge in two glasses.

Felicity watched him intently, discussing with herself whether she should just give in or better fight him.  
It was cute that he wanted to take things slow, but…  
She just had waited too long for him to pull his head out of his ass to not enjoy every single second she had with him.

“Hm…” she hummed, starting to undress herself. “It is really hot in here, right?”

“Really?” Oliver asked, his back till turned towards her. “I thought I’d lighten the fireplace for a little more romance and-”

He stopped as soon as he turned around to her. His eyes were roaming all over her naked body.

Felicity had never thought to ever be so confident about her body in front of him, but Oliver had done a really good job last night, proving to her how much he loved every part of her. And she knew, really knew that he loved her. So why not try something new?

“Don’t you think it’s getting hot?” she asked when Oliver didn’t move. She grabbed one of his hands, putting his finger tips on her stomach and letting them glide down towards her center. “You feel how hot my skin is?”

With a proud smile she saw that his jaw was clenched and his whole body tensed while he tried to not give in to her. She could almost hear a growl coming from his throat.

“Hey, I still have my shoes on,” she said suddenly, letting his fingers fall and Oliver pulled his hand back like it had been burnt.

Felicity moved out of her shoes. As soon as the toes of her second foot touched the cold wood of the floor, she looked up at him and grinned.

“The floor is cold. You better keep me from it,” she said and without hesitation just jumped at him, arms falling around his neck and legs closing around his hips.

For like two heartbeats everything was silent. Oliver still stood as motionless as he didn’t have a naked woman in his arms. But Felicity knew that he was really fighting with himself and finally - finally! - he let out a frustrated sigh.

“I hate you.”

“No. You love me,” Felicity smiled proudly.

“I do,” he sighed. “I do love you.”

Felicity leaned down to peck his lips softly with hers. “So… what are you going to do about it?”

Oliver smirked and-

* * *

 

“Okay, that’s enough!” Thea hurried to say. “I don’t really need to hear the rest of this.”

Felicity grinned and opened her mouth to say something, but just then the door to the lair opened, and the team came back in.

“You just hang up on me in the middle of a conversation?” Oliver asked.

He was angry, but he wasn’t yelling. His voice was low. He had never yelled at her. Not really. His voice was never louder than necessary.

“Well, I figured that you were wrong, and I thought I just do you a favor and end the discussion before it gets really started, and you’ll have to apologize with the whole team listening.”

Oliver looked at her as angrily as he looked at those madmen he hunted.

“We will discuss this at home,” he said.

Felicity watched him leaving to change, then rolled her eyes and looked at her team mates.

“Hey, how about you all come to dinner to us next Sunday? We haven’t had a family dinner in a long time.


	15. The past

_“Your past is always your past. Even if you forget it, it remembers you.”  
Sarah Dessen_

“I’m glad the others are not here yet,” Laurel said with a smile. “We didn’t have a lot of time those last months.”

“I know, and I’m really sorry for it. Emmeline has just taken over all my life.”

“Don’t apologize. You’re a mother now, and I’m really happy, but I have to say I am also really happy to have you back in the foundry and to actually being able to spend some time with you.”

“Me, too,” Felicity smiled, being busy with all the cooking since she had invited the whole team to come over for dinner. “So tell me what’s going on in your life.”

“Actually,” Laurel said with a mix of sigh and laugh, “nothing. It’s like-”

She was interrupted when a high pitched cry came from the crib in the living room. Looked like Emmeline had finally decided to wake up.

“Could you grab her? She probably wants some attention.”

“Oh, are you sure? The only time I ever held a baby was when I visited you after she was born.”

“She’s almost four months old. Trust me, you can’t really damage her,” Felicity assured her, watching as her friend slowly approached the crib.

It was Oliver’s fault that everyone - or at least Roy and Laurel - were so scared about holding Emmeline or even looking at her. When she had been pregnant, her lovely husband had started to make everyone going crazy with the precautions to not let anything happen to his baby and when Emmeline had been born, it had just gotten worse. He had told everyone exactly how they needed to hold her and had always observed everyone who ever had contact with her.

Laurel had Emmeline pressed to her chest. The baby’s little hands were exploring the adult’s face and smiling happily. 

“She is such a sweetheart,” Laurel laughed while Emmeline’s interest in Laurel’s nose grew.

“She likes you. Those last days she had started to become shy with strangers. When our neighbor’s mother took a look in the stroller, she didn’t stop screaming for at least three hours.”

“What?” Laurel asked the baby in her arms, earning her a happy laugh. “You’re a picky baby?”

“She is.”

Felicity glanced at her watch. Everyone was supposed to be here already. Looked like the madman they were after tonight was not as easy to catch as presumed. According to Laurel someone had abducted a child, and Captain Lance had called to get some help to catch him. His position had been found out by the police already, so Felicity hadn’t been needed in the foundry. Everyone except for Laurel who had broken her wrist in a fight last week was on duty. Even Lyla had joined them.

“They’re late,” Felicity mumbled. “When they don’t turn up here soon, the dinner will be ruined.”

Laurel opened her mouth to say something, but before she could make a sound, the phone started ringing. Felicity hurried to take it and glanced at the name on the display. 

“That’s them,” she said before picking up. “Hello?”

“Felicity?” she heard Diggle say.

“Yes. Where are you? The dinner is going to burn when it takes any longer. Besides I’m already starving and-”

“Felicity.”

She shut up immediately. Felicity didn’t know what it was, but something in her friend’s voice let her grip the phone more tightly and let her heartbeat fasten. She had been part of the team long enough to know when there were bad news. And now…  
Now there were bad news.

“Felicity, we are in the hospital” Diggle said. His voice was husky and even broke at the end of the sentence. “You need to come here as soon as possible. It’s Oliver.”

Felicity was already on her way to the door, grabbing her keys when she heard Laurel’s voice call for her. It took every strength she had in her to stop and turn around to her friend who was staring at her with worry in the pretty face.

“I don’t know what happened,” Felicity whispered, not able to use her voice. “But Oliver’s in the hospital, and I need to… I… I need to…”

“Go,” Laurel said immediately. “Go. I’ll stay here, taking care of Emmy. Call me when there are any news.”

Felicity nodded shortly, then turned around and made her way to the car.

Oliver was in the hospital. All the years she had worked with him, Oliver barely ever let himself be brought to the hospital. Even when he had been lying in the back of her car, bleeding after his mother had shot him, she hadn’t been allowed to take him there. And that had probably been one of the worst times.

So when Oliver was in the hospital, it must be really, really, really bad.  
And that scared the hell out of Felicity. 

She didn’t know how she made it to the hospital. One moment she had sat in her car, the next moment she was running inside of the entrance hall towards the woman at the information.

“Oliver Queen,” she said breathlessly. “He was taken in as an emergency I think. I’m not sure. I’m his wife, and a friend told me he is in the hospital and… Where is he?”

“He’s in the OR right now, but-”

“Felicity.”

She turned around as soon as she heard the familiar voice behind her. It was Diggle, looking at her with an expression of worry and even fear Felicity had rarely ever seen on him. He spread his arms and Felicity rushed towards them, doing her best not to burst in tears.

“What happened?”

“It was an accident with the motorcylce,” Diggle answered aloud, kissing the top of her hair and dragging her away, so noboy could hear them when he explained in a whisper, “We had to separate during the mission. Oliver went into one of the warehouses by himself. It turned out that there were a lot more bad guys than the police had assumed. We don’t really now what happened, but he was beaten up really badly and probably fell off one of the frameworks. He was unconcious when Roy found him and was really pale. We had no choice, but to take off his suit and get him here.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “Where is he now?”

“He’s in the OR,” Diggle whispered, rubbing his hands comfortingly up and down her arms. “He had some bleedings inside his head and probably broke his left hand.”

Again Felicity nodded although she wasn’t really sure that she really understood. Oliver was not just some guy who let himself get beaten up. He was the Arrow. He had fought so many bad guys, even Slade Wilson and had survived easily. Well, maybe not easily, but at least-

“Where are the others?” Felicity asked, interrupting her own thoughts.

“In the waiting room. Everyone’s waiting for you. Come on.”

Diggle led her into the small room to his left where their teammates were sitting. Thea was crying, letting herself being held by Roy who had his face down in her hair. Lyla was rubbing Thea’s back in the meanwhile, just stopping when she saw Felicity to take her into her arms and whisper some words that were probably meant to comfort her, but sounded meaningless in Felicity’s ears.

They all sat there silently. Nobody dared to say a word. Thea kept crying, her sobs being the only sounds in the small room. Felicity leaned her head to Diggle’s shoulder, holding his hand in her right and Lyla’s in her left.

It felt like an eternity in which nothing happened. It made Felicity go mad even more than she had been before.

Oliver was in the OR, possibly dying because someone had taken him down while he had been on a mission. And Oliver hadn’t even planned to go back to his nightlife activities after she had announced her pregnancy. No, Oliver had planned on being a normal father with a normal job and normal life, but instead of supporting him about it, Felicity had pushed him back to the Arrow cave because she had wanted to go back there.

And now Oliver was dying. He was dying. Dying like he had all those years ago when he had left for the League. She’d be a widow and a single mother. And Emmeline was going to be a half-orphan.

How was she supposed to raise her on her own? How was she supposed to live without him? How was she supposed to-

“Oliver Queen?”

Everyone got up immediately, rushing right in front of the doctor who almost backed away a feet.

“You’re all family?” he asked.

“I’m his wife,” Felicity said, feeling a tear she had so desperately tried to hold back run over her cheek. “It’s okay. You can speak.”

“Mrs. Queen, your husband had a cerebral hemorrhage that we were managed to stop during the surgery. We also needed to…”

Felicity saw him talk. His lips kept moving, telling her of all his injuries and all the things that had to be done to take care of it, but she just couldn’t hear them. She wanted to know whether he was alive or not. Why didn’t he just say it?

“We will have to wait for him to wake up before we can tell something about the permanent damage, but right now I am optimistic that he will survive, and the permanent damage is not as bad as it could have been.”

He was alive. He was alive, and he was probably going to be okay. She needed to hold onto those words. She needed to hold onto hope just like she almost aways had.

“Can we see him?” Thea asked.

The doctor looked at her shortly before turning back to Felicity. 

“Just a few minutes and just one at a time.”

Felicity glanced at Thea who looked back at her and then nodded as a sign for her to go, so Felicity followed the doctor, put on the coat and finally got into the patient’s room.

“A nurse will come when it’s time to leave,” the doctor said before leaving her alone in the room.

Oliver was lying in a bed, connected to a bunch of machines. Felicity held her breath. If she hadn’t know that it was Oliver, she probably would have trouble to recognize him. His face was swollen and bruised. His hand was in a plaster and…  
He looked so vulnerable.

Felicity breathed in deeply before exhaling slowling and sitting down on Oliver’s bedside. She took his fingers in hers, stroking the rough skin with her thumb.

“Hi, baby,” she whispered, holding back a sob. “It’s me. Felicity. You’re safe now, and you are going to be alright. You just have to wake up. You have to wake up, so you can come back to me and to Emmeline. She is going to miss you like crazy. You know she is a little daddy’s girl. You need to come back to all the other babies we are going to have in our future. You said you wanted to have at least two more. And we still need to go to all the places we planned on visiting. You promised me vacation.  
We need to live the life that-”

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Queen,” a nurse said when coming in. “Your husband needs to rest. You can come back here tomorrow in the morning. He’s not waking up before that anyway.”

Felicity nodded although a voice inside her head screamed that she should fight this to just get a few more minutes, but she knew that if Oliver really needed to rest, she wouldn’t help by yelling. So she just pressed a kiss to Oliver’s temple and whispered, “I’ll be back. I love you.”

As soon as she had left the room, Felicity couldn’t hold back any longer. She threw herself into Diggle’s arms. He had been waiting for her and just rocked her back and forth like a baby. 

“It was terrible, John,” she sobbed while letting him guide her back to the waiting room. “His whole face is bruised and there are at least three different machines monitoring his condition and…”

“It’s okay, Felicity,” Diggle whispered. “It’s okay. He’s going to be okay.”

Felicity let herself be held and comforted by her friend until the tears were dried, and her breathing calmed down. She then sat up and looked around the room. Except for a young woman who was half asleep the room was empty.

“Where are the others?”

“Lyla had to go home because the nanny called and shortly after Laurel called and asked for help. She couldn’t calm Emmeline down and didn’t know what to do, so Roy’s taking Thea to your place. I guess you want to stay here?”

Felicity nodded.

“Fine. Then I’ll stay with you,” Diggle said. His voice didn’t leave any chance to protest, so Felicity again just nodded.

She put her head back for the shortest time before looking at Diggle again, asking, “You have a laptop here?”

He shook his head.  
Of course! Who brought a laptop to a hospital?!

She sighed and leaned her head back to the wall again, closing her eyes.  
This must be a dream. Just a few hours ago she was talking to Oliver about the family dinner they were supposed to have tonight. How could her world have fallen apart in that short of time?

This morning they had lain in bed, looking at each other and once again told each other how much they loved each other. He had said that she had been the best thing that had ever happened to him and that he wouldn’t trade an eternity with anyone else for just a moment with her.

“I’m sorry, but did you say you need a laptop?”

Felicity opened her eyes, looking at the young woman on the other side of the room.

“Yes,” she said breathlessly.

“You can borrow mine if you want to.”

“That would be great,” Felicity said with a first smile this evening. The young woman reached inside of her bag, pulling out a laptop and handing it over. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re here because of your husband, right?” she asked.

Felicity nodded. “Motorcycle accident. You?”

“My mother fell down the stairs and-”

She was interrupted by a nurse entering the room. “Miss Davidson?”

“That’s me,” the young woman answered. She left the room, just turning back to say, “I’ll go see my mom. Before I go home, I’ll come back to grab my laptop.”

“Sure. Of course. Thanks again.”

As soon as the woman had left Felicity started to work. Her fingers flew of the keyboard, causing numbers and letters to appear and disappear on the display.

“What are you doing?” Diggle asked her.

“The warehouses you were in tonight are only reachable on one way. There are two cameras, filming the distributor road so I am hacking them to see who were the guys who have been there and attacked Oliver.”

“You don’t have to do this now,” Diggle told her softly. “We can still catch them when Oliver’s better.”

“But there is nothing I can do for him right now expect for this,” Felicity explained. “And I’m already in, so…”

She fast-forwarded the video until two vans finally appeared. She then stopped the recording and zoomed to the cars’ windows to take a look at the guys who had assulted her husband. She didn’t recognize the guys in the first car, but nonetheless saved the screenshot to send it to herself by mail and let run her face regocnition program over it.

She let the video run two more seconds to have a better look at the guys in the second car. Again she zoomed in on the people in the car and she froze, seeing the man who drove the car.

“John,” Felicity whispered.

“What is it?”

“I know that guy.”

Diggle tensed beside her. “Who is he?”

“Michael Foster.”

“Who is Michael Foster?”

Felicity gulped and felt her hands shaking. “Remember when you watched me from your car to make sure Slade wouldn’t hurt me?”

Diggle nodded, obviously unsure what she was trying to tell.

“I told you about that Lacross player that watched me, right?”

Again Diggle nodded, and his eyes told her that he had the slightest notion where this was going.

“That was Michael Foster. He stalked me in my freshmen year.”

* * *

_“The past is never where you think you left it.”  
Katherine Anne Porter_

“Did you know that he was in Starling?” Diggle asked, needing no further information.

A long time ago Felicity had decided to tell her friend everything about Michael Foster. She had needed a dry run to tell Oliver after that. It had helped because unlike Oliver Diggle had been very calm and suppotive about her telling him everything that had happened with that guy. Oliver had been too emotional about the woman he loved getting hurt. 

Felicity remembered telling both men about her friend Amber who’s boyfriend was part of the Lacross team. She had arranged a double date with Michael Foster, thinking that he and Felicity were kind of meant for each other.  
The dinner had been nice, Michael Foster had been a great guy - but Felicity just hadn’t had feelings for him. There had been no butterflies or anything else.  
When Felicity had told him that, he had started to stalk her. He had spent days, sitting in his car and watching her apartment, following her every step of her way.  
One night he had waited for her to come home and had ambuscaded to try and convince her that they really were meant for each other. And when words had been useless, he had just slapped her with so much strength that Felicity’s head had banged against the wall.  
Thankfully a neighbor had seen it and had called the ambulance and police before coming to her rescue and getting that guy off from her. She had pressed charges, and he had been arrested and forced to stay away from her for good. She had never seen him again and just barely thought about him.

“No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I haven’t seen him in years and if I had known that he was back, I would have…”

What would she have done, she wondered quietly. There was nothing that she could have done. Telling Oliver had never been an option since he had been that mad on that guy, Felicty knew he would have just gotten in his Arrow suit and would have killed him. She had told him that Michael Foster was dangerous and even threatened that she’d regret turning him down.

“Do you think he came here because of you?” Diggle asked.

Felicity shrugged, feeling a pain beginning in her stomach. “I don’t know. I mean… It is a strange coincidence, isn’t it? He comes here and beats up my husband?”

“Well, Oliver is not just a husband,” Diggle reminded her. “He was there as the Arrow. So maybe Foster was just part of the abduction and put down the guy who was getting in his way.”

“Speaking of abduction, how’s the victim?”

All her worries about Oliver had made her forget about the fact that there had been an abducted child.

“The boy is great. Roy even had to sign an autograph.”

Felicity snorted. “And what did that do to his ego?”

Diggle chuckled, shaking his head and resting one hand on Felicity’s knee. “Let’s just wait for Oliver to get better. We can still think about what all of this means when he woke up. I will talk to Lyla, Roy, Thea and Laurel to make sure you and Emmeline are never alone just in case Foster really came here because of you. Right now we can’t really do anything, so how about you try to sleep for a little while, and I’m calling Lance and Laurel to tell them about what you found out?”

“I don’t think I can sleep,” Felicity told him, erasing the traces of her hacking from the laptop before turning it off. “Besides, I should probably call Thea and ask if everthing’s alright with Emmeline and tell her about Foster. In case he shows up at our place, Roy and Thea better be prepared.”

But before she could even grab her phone, the nurse who had kicked her out of Oliver’s room almost two hours ago came in. Her face was red, and she seemed a little upset.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Queen,” she said.

Felicity felt her stomach drop, and a feeling of sickness taking hold of her.  
She sent a silent prayer that Oliver wasn’t dead.  
She couldn’t handle it. Not again. She knew what it felt like to lose him and losing him now would only be worse. She had gotten so used to him being around her all the time and making her laugh and…

She couldn’t lose him. And the thought made tears form in her eyes.

“It’s really unusual for patients to wake up that soon after a brain surgery, but your husband is awake, and he’s asking or better yelling for you. You better come with me and try to calm him down. We had to fetter him because he was attacking the staff.”

Felicity looked at Diggle who nodded. “Go. I’ll call Thea.”

She followed the nurse to Oliver’s room. She heard his voice even through the closed door, and she could tell that he was really upset.

“Who are you? Where am I? And where is my wife? I want my wife here! Where the hell is she? Let me go!”

Felicity didn’t care to put on the overall. She just stormed into the room, running right towards Oliver whose hands really were fettered to the bed. He must have been in panic when he had woken up all alone in this room. She grabbed the hand closest to her and put her free hand to his cheek. All his focus was on her, and he calmed down immediately.

“Hi,” she breathed, pecking his lips with hers, carefully avoiding the bruise on his bottom lip and wiping away the tears that had escaped her eyes and were running down her cheeks. “I’m here. You’re safe. Everything is okay. You’re in the hospital.”

“What happened?” he asked huskily.

“Like I tried to tell you, Mr. Queen,” the doctor said, clearing his throat. “You had an motorcylce accident. Your head took most of the damage. We had to produce surgery to take care of an internal bleeding. Five of your ribs are cracked. Your hand is broken. There will be left some scars on your body, I guess, but compared to those scars you already have I feel tempted to say it’s almost nothing. The brain damage is the only thing to really worry about.”

“Can you say anything more about the possible permanent damage?”

“Unfortunately your husband won’t let us treat him. That is why we needed to put on the fetters.”

Felicity looked back at Oliver. He hadn’t taking his eyes from her at any second. She knew that he ususally felt calmer when she was there and he could just look at her.

“Oliver, you need to let them treat you, okay?” she asked, not waiting for his answer to take off the fetters. She squeezed his hand reassuringly, and he nodded, so she turned around to the doctor. “You can examine him now. He just panicked when he woke up.”

The doctor took his time, examining him as accurately as possible before taking a step back and nodding.

“Looks like your lucky day. As far as I can tell there will be no permanent damages remaining. The bruises in your face and your hand will take some time to heal, but it all looks like you really had an guardian angel. You maybe could do him a favor and put on a helmet the next time you drive.”

Oliver still didn’t say a word. So Felicity nodded. “I’ll take care of that. How long will he have to stay here?”

“I’m not staying here at all. I’m going home now,” Oliver said, already making movements to get rid of the wires that connected him to the machines around him, but Felicity grabbed his hand and pulled it down, slightly shaking her head.

“You should at least stay here for a week. Although the surgery worked as good as it did, it was still a-”

“I’m not staying.”

“Don’t worry,” Felicity sighed to the doctor. “He’s staying. Thank you.”

As soon as the doctor left and they were alone, Felicity turned back around to Oliver who was staring at her angrily.

“I’m not staying,” he repeated.

“Yes, you are staying,” she answered. “If you refuse to do it for yourself, then please consider doing it for me. I can’t take care of a baby and a wounded husband and don’t even try to tell me that you don’t need to be taken care of. You were seriously injured.”

Oliver kept staring at her, so Felicity knew she needed to be a little more convincing. She leaned forward, pressing her lips to his again and letting her forehead fall against his.

“Please?”

“One night.“

“You’ll stay at least five.”

“No.”

“Yes,” she said, her voice as hard as possible and glared at him, making sure he knew that there was no use in fighting her on this. She wouldn’t give in.

“Fine,” Oliver growled. “Where’s Digg? I need to talk to him about something.”

“Right here,” Diggle said, right then entering the room as if he had just waited for his name to be dropped. “What’s going on?”

“Felicity, could you please give us a second?” Oliver asked her.

Felicity gulped. She recognized the expression in his face. His eyes sparkled with anger. His jaw was clenched tightly, and his lips were formed to a thin line. It had been the exact same expression as when she had told him about her stalker.

“Is this about Foster?” she asked right then, seeing no point in pretending not to know what he was probably upset about.

“You know it was him?” 

Felicity nodded while Diggle explained everything that happened after they had separated on the mission.

“So Thea and Roy are with Emmeline?” Oliver asked.

Diggle nodded. “I have just talked to them and even told them about Foster, so they know that they have to watch Emmy even more carefully.”

“Good, but I want her here. Call them and tell them that they need to take her here.”

“Oliver, it’s the middle of the night,” Felicity reminded him. “Emmeline is asleep and waking her up will only upset her. Besides, a hospital is not the best place for a baby. All the pathogenic germs…”

Not to mention that Emmeline was problaby going to be very scared when she saw her father like that. The bruises in his face were even more swollen than before. He probably couldn’t see anything with his left eye.

“How am I supposed to protect her if she’s not here?”

Felicity squeezed his hand. “Roy and Thea take care of her.”

“And when they come here to visit you, I will watch your girls. I’ll even move in with them for as long as you are here. Don’t worry. We are all a family, and we take care of each other and…”

Diggle said some more things Felicity couldn’t focus on. She was distracted by Oliver’s hand. When she had started to move her thumb over his knuckles she had realized that there was something missing.

“Where’s your wedding ring?” she asked him.

It was the hand that wasn’t bruised and even if it had been necessary to take the ring off for the surgery, they would have given it to her or something.

When she looked up, she saw that Oliver’s gaze was frozen onto her face.

“Foster took it from me after he drugged me and beat me. He said that it was supposed to be his in the first place.”

* * *

_“She always used to say that the past is a relentless parasite in its quest, feeding off of the senses, looking for anything that will trigger a memory–forever there to complicate the present, forever there to remind us that it will always be a piece of us. I never had a clue as to what she meant, until now.”  
Laura Miller_

Felicity felt a shiver running down her spine, hearing Oliver’s words.  
So it was true. Michael Foster being in Starling City and Oliver being beaten up by him hadn’t been a random coincident. Foster had planned this. He was here for her. And he was good in what he was doing. How else had he been able not just to unmask Oliver as the Arrow, but also managed to take him down and put him in a hospital?

“Felicity?” Diggle said quietly behind her, and she winced when he put a hand to her shoulder. “It’s okay. Nothing’s going to happen to you or Emmeline.”

“Yes, I know,” Felicity said although she wasn’t even half as sure about that as she tried to make it sound and according to the glances Oliver and Diggle shot her, she was sure they didn’t believe her.

How was she supposed to stay calm when someone from her past just turned up here and tried to force himself into her life, into her family?  
But she just couldn’t allow herself to go to deep into that thought for now. Not as long as Oliver was still in here wounded and needing her support.

She moved to get up from the bedside where she had sat down and pulled the blanket more over him, not missing the opportunity to let her palms move over his broad chest. Softly she put a hand to his cheek and pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips.

“You should get some sleep. We will come back in the morning, and then we can discuss what we are going to do about all of this. Just rest.”

“We’re not staying here?” Diggle asked quietly.

“No, I need to get home and see Emmeline, make sure she is okay.”

He nodded. “Okay, so then I’m waiting outside and give you two a minute before I take you home. Night, man.”

“Night,” Oliver said before turning back to Felicity.

She could see in his eyes that he doubted her words that she was really going home to take care of Emmeline, but he didn’t question her, instead just pulled on her hand to make her sit on the bedside again. He lifted a hand to her face and let his knuckles stroke over her cheek bone. Although the touch was as soft as usual, his eyes were hard and showed nothing of the love and desire she had seen there ever since they had gotten together. Or even before that.

“We’re going to be okay. I’m getting out of here, and then I will find Foster, and I will take care of him. He’s threatening my family and that means he’s going to die. So I will find him and when I do, I will kill him.”

Felicity felt her hands starting to shake at his words.  
This wasn’t her Oliver. This wasn’t the man who had asked her to marry him and who had started to cry when she had told him what he was going to be a father, not to mention the man who was adoring his daughter like she was the most precious thing he had ever had in his arms.  
He sounded like - Felicity didn’t really want to think it, but she knew that she did already - the Hood.

“Oliver, I don’t think that-” she started, but was interrupted when his face hardened even more. Maybe now was not the time to tell him that what he was planning on doing wasn’t right. So she just bit her bottom lip and nodded slightly. “I have to go. I’ll be back in a few hours.”

She got up and left the room. For the first time in what felt like forever there was no goodbye kiss, no smile, not even a word of love when they separated, and Felicity could feel the change between the two of them already taking a place in her heart. She needed all her strength to not just burst into tears, but she could hold back on it. She needed to.

“I guess, I’m not taking you home?” Diggle asked when she approached him, seeing the tears in her eyes, but knowing that she would talk to him when she was ready for it.

“No, we’re going to the foundry.”

They drove without saying a word. Felicity could feel her friend throwing worried glances in her direction, but she ignored him and kept watching out of her window.

She needed to find Foster before Oliver did because she was sure that when he did, he really would kill him and when he did, he would never come back from it. All those years they had worked on his attitude would be ruined. He would kill him and maybe later see what he had done and everything that they had suffered years ago would happen again. Oliver would see the killer inside of him and believe that killing was the only way, and he would think that she deserved better and push her away.

So she needed to prevent this from happening.

As soon as her computers were ready, she started working, hacking like hell to find out everything she could about Foster - what he had done the last years, who he was working with and where she could find him. She needed more time than usually, being unfocused by the late events.

“Maybe you need a little break,” Diggle suggested when the computer made a warning sound for what seemed the hundredth time within the last five minutes. All the time he had worked with Felicity, he had never seen her typing in so many of the wrong commands in just one night. “You could tell me what happened between you and Oliver after I left.”

She wanted to turn him down, not wanting to take a break from what she was doing, but when the computer again beeped in warning Felicity sighed in frustration and turned towards Diggle.

“He wants to kill him, John,” she whispered, not being able to make the words become louder.

“I’m not surprised. He wanted to kill him when you told him about him in the first place, but that was something different because it was all part of the past,” Diggle explained. “Now Foster is here, and that means he is threatening the three of you. Of course Oliver wants to get rid of him for good.”

“But if he kills him, Oliver will never come back from it,” Felicity kept whispering. “We can’t let that happen.”

“Oliver is mad,” Diggle sighed. “Which is completely okay after everything that happened, but I don’t think he will really kill him. He knows that what he has with you and Emmeline is worth more than any kind of revenge or misguided motion of protecting you.”

“I’m not so sure about that, John. I saw it in his eyes. Foster really got under his skin, and I think that maybe he’s not just mad at him for what happened.”

“What do you mean?”

Felicity hesitated. As long as she kept all her thoughts to herself she wouldn’t have to admit how true they really might be. She could still pretend that this was just her reacting hysterically to what had happened.  
But Felicity doubted that it was as easy as this.

“I think he’s angry with me for pushing him to go back to being the Arrow and saving the city. I mean… You know, he wanted to have this normal life with me and Emmeline. He wanted to be CEO of QC, brother, friend, husband and father, but no more the Arrow. So I pushed him and told him that the Arrow was a part of him and that he needed to come back here to balance the different parts within him.” She felt a tear escaping her eye. “What if he thinks that all of this is my fault? That he would have died because of me and that our daughter almost would have grown up as a half-orphan because of me?”

It was one of his biggest fears - that he had to leave Emmeline before she was old enough.

John stayed sitting down on the corner of the table silently before he began to nod slightly and answered, “This is not your fault, Felicity. Oliver needed to come back here and deep down he knows that. He might have thought that he could just forget everything that had happened in his past and be a normal dad or something, but he would have never been able to really do it. The Arrow is a part of him. Just unlike him, you accept that.“

Felicity wanted to object, but right then the computer beeped as a sign for finally having found something.

“What is it?” Diggle asked, moving closer behind her. 

“One of his credit cards was just registered in a hotel here in Starling City.”

“Then I will go and have a not so nice talk with someone about how to not handle my friends,” Diggle said, already moving around to go.

“I’m coming with you,” Felicty hurried to say and followed behind him.

Diggle was already on the stairs when she approached him. He turned around to her and shook his head.

“It’s too dangerous, and Oliver is going to kill me when he finds out.”

“He’s not going to find out. He’s in the hospital. Besides, you really shouldn’t go alone. Foster is dangerous. Maybe when I am with you he will try to show his best attitude and behave.”

Diggle didn’t look convinced, but seemed to also know that there really wasn’t anything he could say to convince her to stay here. So he just nodded.

They drove to the hotel, again not saying a word. Felicity could feel her heart pound like crazy inside of her chest. She never would have thought that she was ever going to see Michael Foster again. According to FBI statistics most stalkers just looked out for a new victim when one was moving away or something. It wasn’t a good sign that he had followed her across the country.

When they reached the hotel, Diggle turned off the motor and pulled out one gun from the glove compartment and two others from under the seat. She didn’t dare to ask whether he was driving around with three guns all the time.

“You will always stay behind me,” Diggle said to her with hard voice. “You will always stay behind me, and you will do exactly what I tell you to do when I tell you to do. So when I tell you to run, you run.”

Felicity nodded, already objecting in her head, but she was smart enough not to say that out loud.

Diggle gave her one of the guns, hiding the other two under his jacket while Felicity put hers into her jacket pocket.

When they entered the hotel, Felicity took a look around. It wasn’t one of the best hotels in town, but not one of the worst as well. An old, bored looking guy stood behind the reception desk. Even when they were standing right in front of him, and Diggle harrumphed loudly, he didn’t look up from his crossword.

“Can I help you?” he just asked, voice as bored as his face.

“Michael Foster.”

“Room 214, but he’s not there.”

“Mind if we wait in front of his room?”

“It’s a free country.”

Diggle moved to the stairs, Felicity following him upstairs and through the corridor until they came to stand in front of Foster’s door.

“What are we going to do?” Felicity whispered.

Without a word Diggle pulled out a lock pick and had the door opened just seconds after. He put one finger to his lips, urging her to stay quiet while pulling out his gun. Silently they entered the room, Diggle right in front of her, blocking her from any possible danger.

Felicity could hear her heart pound even more loudly than before. She held her breath while Diggle moved one hand to turn on the light, checking the room again and then lowered his guns.

“This looks even worse than it was with Cupid. I think we really have a problem here,” Felicity heard him whispered and moved to the side to see what he was seeing since his body was blocking her view on the small hotel room.

“Oh my god.”

Even that was an understatement. All walls of the small place were placarded with photos of her. Everywhere Felicity looked her face was smiling back at her. Photos that were published in various magazines, photos of her in public, alone or with friends or family. She was everywhere.

“His credit card was just registered into the sytsem,” Felicity whispered. “How could he have done all of this in that short of time?”

“Maybe he paid cash untill now. Or something. I don’t think he really moved in just this week. Look at all these photos. That must have taken a few hours, and I don’t think he let anyone else-”

Diggle interrupted himself and made a motion for her to be quiet as well which Felicity did immediately. Again she held her breath, listening into the corridor where she heard a voice, obviously talking on the phone to someone.

“Come here. Fire escape,” Diggle whispered, pulling her through the window.

They ran down the stairs, not looking back. Felicity knew that although they had found Foster, now was not the time to take him down. They needed more support for that, or rather Diggle needed more support for it since Felicity didn’t even count as support in the field.

When they reached the last step, Diggle pulled Felicity into a dark corner, pressing her to him while observing something about her head, probably Foster’s window, but Felicity wasn’t sure. She just waited for him to give her the go.

“Okay, I don’t think he saw us, but he was close.”

She nodded, pulling back slightly and letting Diggle guide her to the car.

Although the sun was starting to rise already, Felicity could barely see anything in the dark. She was tired and exhausted, but at the same time so keen that her tiredness felt more like she had kicked her head or something.

“I’m going to take you home now,” Diggle said with firm voice. “We all need some sleep and rest before we go after him again. Tomorrow we will all meet in the foundry and work out a plan to take him down.”

“You think it will be as easy as it sounds?”

Diggle shot her a short glance that was answer enough. It problaby wouldn’t be easy. The only advantage they had right now was that they knew it was Foster.

“Why do you think he let us know that it was him?” Felicity asked. “I mean he could have just killed Oliver and hoped we wouldn’t find out it was him. He could have even destroyed the cameras to make sure we wouldn’t find out. It surprises me that he didn’t.”

Diggle shrugged. “Maybe he’s looking at this like a game.”

“Or rather foreplay,” it escaped Felicity before she could hold back.

“Hey, he’s not going to come near you. I’ll take care of you.”

“You can’t stay at my side for as long as we haven’t caught him.”

“Of course I can,” Diggle assured her.

“You have your own family.”

“Which you are a part of. You’re like a little sister to me.”

Felicity smiled. “Thank you. Big brother.”

Diggle chuckled, taking her hand and squeezing it while stopping the car right in front of her house.

They entered the house, expecting to find it dark and quiet since Emmeline and at least one of her babysitters Thea and Roy should be asleep. Instead the three of them sat in the living room, joined by another person.

“What are you doing here?” she asked Oliver immediately, letting her coat and her purse fall to the floor carefully.

She could see how Diggle gave Roy and Thea a slight nod towards the kitchen to give the couple that was about to fight a bit room. Thea got up and took Emmeline who looked like she was half asleep from Oliver’s hold before following her boyfriend into the kitchen.

“Well, I thought if you lie to me about going back home, I can lie to you about staying in the hospital,” he said, his voice cold.

“I was-”

“Lying,” Oliver completed the sentence for her. “Which is fine because hey, at least now we’re even right? So… where have you been? Trying to track down Foster, so you find him before me?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied. “Because you are out of your mind if you really think that I’m just letting you kill him.”

“ _Let_ me kill him? It’s not like I need your approval for everything that I do.”

“No, you don’t, but-”

“But what? But you would like me to need it? You would like me to be your little pet dog, doing exactly what you tell me to and always following your orders?”

“It’s not-”

“Of course it is like that, Felicity! It has always been that way. You have an opinion on something, and you want me to just nod it through. It has been that way ever since I came back from my fight with Ra’s al Ghul all this time ago, and I won’t do it anymore.”

“Oh, really?” Felicity asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest. She became more and more furious with him. “And what are you going to do now? Are you going to leave until this is done, until you have killed him and then you come back here and expect us to just go through with our lives?”

They were standing right in front of each other, noses almost touching. Both of their eyes sparkling angrily.

“You know what?” Oliver asked. “That is exactly what I’m going to do.”

He took a step back before heading to the kitchen and pressing a kiss to Emmeline’s head. He mumbled something to her ear. Felicity wasn’t sure, but it sounded like Russian to her.

Oliver then turned around and went to the door while Felicity still stood where he had left her.

“Where do you think you’re going?” she asked him.

“I’m going to find Foster and make sure he never comes near my daughter. I will find him, and I will kill him. And when I’ven done that, I will come back to Emmeline and keep going on with my life,” he told her without looking at her and opened the door.

“Oliver!” Thea shouted after him, but he didn’t look back. He left the house and let the door fall shut behind him.

Felicity stared at the door without saying a word. Oliver’s words spun in her head over and over again. _I’m going to find Foster and make sure he never comes near my daughter. I will find him and I will kill him. And when I’ven done that, I will come back to Emmeline and keep going on with my life_. He hadn’t even mention her. Like she wasn’t a part of his life.

With tears in her eyes she looked at Roy, Diggle and Thea, who was still holding Emmeline in her arms. “What just happened?”

* * *

_“My past has shaped me, that’s true of anyone.”  
R.K. Lilley_

Even after driving around in the city, Oliver had no idea what had just happened.

When he had woken up in the hospital, all he had been able to think about had been Felicity. He had needed her by his side and when all the hospital staff around him, had told him that he had needed to be examined and that they’d get Felicity right after that he had freaked out. He had wanted to see her, wanted to hold her hand and just make sure that she was okay.

That Foster hadn’t done anything to her yet.

But as soon as she had entered the room, he hadn’t been able to look at her the way he had always been looking at her since the moment he had fallen in love with her. Something inside of him had changed towards her. Although her presence had the same calming effect on him as ever there had been something else. Something he still wasn’t able to make out.

And then Felicity had told him that she needed to go home to Emmeline, and he had seen in her face that she had been lying. He had known that she had had different plans, so he had just waited for her to leave the room before he had rolled out of bed and had left the room after her. His first instinct had been to follow her and find out what it was that she had been keeping from him, but then he had thought about Emmeline and before he had known, he had been home with his sweet, little daughter in his arms.

Still Emmeline was everything he could clearly think about. He wouldn’t let Foster come near to her. Never. So he needed to find him, and he needed to kill him. It was the only way to make sure he wouldn’t lose his daughter.

Just a few minutes later Oliver stopped the car behind Verdant, hurrying down into the foundry and starting Felicity’s computers. If there were any saved research results, she must have encoded them. He couldn’t find anything. So Oliver did his best to find something on his own.

Thirty minutes later he jumped out of the chair with a curse, starting to pace back and forth. He had never been good with computers. That’s why he had needed Felicity in the first place. Without her help the computers wouldn’t have any use to him.

But she surely wouldn’t help him. And he surely wouldn’t ask her to help. He didn’t even want her to help him.

Oliver grabbed two guns from one of the closets, hiding them under his leather jacket when he heard the door close loudly. He didn’t bother to look up. He didn’t want to talk to anyone.

“Ollie,” Thea sighed and grabbed his forearm when Oliver tried to just rush past her and out of the room. “You realize you kind of broke up with the love of your life, right? The mother of your child is at your home, crying her eyes out because first her husband gets attacked, then she finds out her stalker is back to make her life a living hell and finally the love of her life yells at her for things nobody truly understood and then just leaves, making it sound like he is not planning on going on with his marriage.”

“Maybe it’s because I’m not.”

Even without his sister’s widened eyes he knew that what he had said was something that nobody ever had imagined coming out of his mouth, not even he himself.

With a frustrated, painful and even desperate groan he turned around, freeing himself from Thea’s grip and stamped to one of the tables, removing all of the items on it with one swift move, so they ended up on the floor.

“Foster is threatening to take her away from me, and I-” he turned around to his sisters, opening his mouth without saying anything.  
How was he able to express what he felt? How could he tell his sister what it felt like for him to have his worst nightmare come true? When the Count had threatened Felicity’s life, he had felt almost the same way, but this time it was intensified. He would take an eternity on this island or in Hong Kong, in Nanda Parbat or even in hell, if he didn’t have to feel this way.  
“I feel like I already lost her.”

For a long moment Thea just stared at him, eyebrows furrowed and arms crossed in front of his chest. Slowly she approached him, standing right in front of him for like two heartbeats before she wrapped her arms around his torso, giving him a comforting hug.

“Ollie, you haven’t lost her yet, and you won’t. Or at least you won’t if you don’t push her away,” she whispered into his ear. “You are not alone in this. You have a team here, and we will all do our best to find that guy who’s after her.”

“I will kill him,” Oliver said huskily, but he didn’t miss that it sounded more like a question than a statement.

“No, you won’t,” Thea assured him, pressing into his body a little more. “Because you are not that guy anymore. You are not the person who kills anymore and even if I really get why you feel like you have to, killing Foster won’t change the fact that there will always be new threats. There will always be times when someone decides that threatening Felicity or Emmeline is a good idea. Killing him won’t take the fear of losing them away from you.  
All it will do is making you lose your soul.”

“I can’t lose her, Thea. Not her, not Emmeline.”

“I know, Ollie. Neither do I.” Thea rubbed his back, leaning her head against his cheek.

“She not going to forgive me.”  
He was so close to bursting out in tears, he could feel the sobs in his throat already. If he had lost Felicity, then just because he had pushed her away again altough he had promised her only God knew how many times that he’d never do it again.

“Of course she will,” Thea said. “You just have to tell her that it was all because you were scared and that… I don’t know. But I do know that Felicity is the strongest and smartest person I know, and I’m sure that if you explain everything to her she will forgive you. She might need some time, but she will forgive you. But you should go and talk to her now.”

Oliver nodded, slowly moving out of the hug and swiping the tears out of his face before looking at his sister with the slightest smile.  
“When did my little baby sister become so adult?”

She shrugged. “A while ago, I guess. You should really go now. The sooner you make up for the mess you made the better.”

Again he nodded. “Is Felicity still home?”

“Yes. When I left she decided to go to sleep. I guess crying made her tired.”

Oliver clenched his jaw. He was going to do everything he could to assure Felicity that he never would leave her. Never. And he would do whatever it took to make up for the tears she had cried because of him.

“Who’s with her?”

“Roy. Felicity asked John to take Emmeline with him to Lyla and Sara. She didn’t want her to realize anything of what was going on, so a little Diggle family time seemed the best.”

“Okay,” Oliver sighed, placing one hand on his sister’s shoulder and smiled at her weakly. “Thank you.”

“Somebody needed to kick your ass.”

Oliver snorted, giving her the two guns and hurried outside.

What had he been thinking? Going back to pushing Felicity away had never been an option from the moment she had walked into the penthouse he had shared with his sister at that time and had just declared that they were together, no matter what he was thinking.

All he could do know was hope that she would take him back. He could actually understand if she didn’t. He had pusher her away so many times he had lost count. Maybe she didn’t want to live with the fear of being pushed away by him whenever something bad happened. Who would want that?

The key already in the lock of his front door, he breathed in deeply, sending a quiet prayer to a God he still wasn’t sure he believed in, hoping he had done anything good in his life that made him deserve Felicity’s forgiveness.

He opened the door, entered the house and froze.  
Even in the dark he could see the chaos. Paintings on the wall were crooked. The floor was covered with broken pieces of glass.  Furniture was destroyed, the loose pieces scattered on the floor. Even when Felicity had been mad about what had happened, she wouldn’t have the strength or endurance to destroy half of the room.  
Oliver switched on the light, observing the destruction of the living room for just a second before he started to shout, “Felicity!”

The fear fisted around his throat, not allowing him to breathe while simultanously his heartbeat fastened.  
He started moving. He ran into the living room, looking around for the woman he loved, but she wasn’t there. Neither was Roy.

“Roy! Felicity!” he shouted again and again, scanning every room in the first floor for them before running up the stairs and into the corridor.

“Roy!” he shouted when he found his partner lying on the floor, his face as bruised as his own. He was unconscious.  
Oliver kneeled down by his side, softly slapping his partner to get him to wake up, but Roy didn’t even make a sound. Ruggedly Oliver pressed two fingers into the cut on the side of Roy’s chest. Screaming, Roy opened his eyes, trying to fight Oliver.  
“I know you are in pain,” Oliver said loudly, barely hearing his own voice over the sound of his heartbeat. “But I need to know where Felicity is.”

Two endless long heartbeats nothing happened. Roy was starring at him with glazed eyes. He winced in his arms.

“He took her,” Roy finally managed to press out. “Foster took her.”

* * *

_“At some point the future becomes reality. And then it quickly becomes the past.”  
Haruki Murakami_

Felicity felt sick. She had the same feeling of nausea in her stomach that she had had the first months of her pregnancy.  
For a short second she wondered whether she was pregnant, but soon concluded that she was not. Emmeline was still so young, and she and Oliver hadn’t talked about another baby. Of course they hadn’t.  
Although Felicity could imagine having another baby with that handsome, kind husband of hers.

Sighing, she turned around to let her head rest on his chest and inhale his scent deeply. She loved the smell of his skin and his aftershave mixed together with sweat of their nighttime activities.  
The more surprised she wwas when a foreign smell came from him.

“Good morning, Sugar Pie!”

Screaming, Felicity moved away, attempting to jump out of bed, but she found that her ankles were fettered to the bed. She fell down hard on the floor, her legs up in the air, unable to move from the handcuffs that were now cutting into her skin.

“What’s wrong, Sugar Pie?”

Foster looked down to her. Given the situation his smile looked more psychotic than loving. 

Everything came rushing back to her. Oliver had been attacked. It had been Foster, her formely and new stalker. She had been in his hotel room and had seen all the photos he had taken of her. When she had come home, she had had that fight with Oliver which had ended with him leaving the house and maybe even their marriage. Later Foster had come to her place. He had taken down Roy. He had abducted her.  
Oh my God, was all she could think, her heart beating like crazy inside of her chest. A little stronger and she was sure her rips would crack.

“Come back to bed, Sugar Pie,” Foster whispered, holding out a hand to her.  
Felicity didn’t miss that he was wearing Oliver’s wedding ring that he had taken when he had beaten him up earlier that night.

“How late is it?” she asked, trying to play for time, so she could think about what she should do. She was not going into bed with him.

“Almost ten o’clock,” he answered, smiling and still holding out his hand for her. “I think the little tranquilizer I had to give you to get you here must have really taken you out.”

“You gave me a tranquilizer?”

He nodded, sliding closer to the edge of the bed, so he was closer to her. Felicity fought against pulling away. She didn’t want to provoke him because of the fear that maybe something inside of him would snap and maybe he would hurt her. So she stayed where she was sitting on the floor, trying to relax.  
As long as she played along, maybe he wouldn’t hurt her and hopefully the team would find her.

She wanted Oliver to find her, but he probably didn’t even know she was missing. After he had left the house, she had tried to call him at least seven times, but he hadn’t picked up. Nobody had reached him.

“I was just scared you could get hurt,” he answered. “That guy who was holding you captive could have hurt you, and I didn’t want that to happen, so I made sure you were out of the crosshairs.”

“That was very decent of you,” Felicity said. She could only hope that the tremble in her voice wasn't as well to hear as it sounded in her ear. 

“Will you now please come back to bed?” he asked her. “We should celebrate out reunion.”

For a second Felicity’s heart stopped. She was not getting into bed with him! She’d do what was necessary to make him believe that she was here because she wanted to be, but she was not going to let him touch her. No way!

“Actually I feel a little hungry.”

“Oh, of course,” Foster said, rolling out of bed. “Let’s get you fed then.”

He opened the handcuffs, throwing them on the bed carlessly.  
When he again held out his hand to help her get up from the floor, Felicity felt like she had no choice. She put her hand in his, letting her body be pulled to her feet.

“Thank you,” she managed to say quietly.

“Do you want a short tour through the house?” he asked, his voice full of excitement. 

Felicity did her best to put on a smile. “Maybe later.”

Foster nodded, letting his hand rest on her lower back when he led her out of the room. Felicity just noted that she was wearing one of her pajamas. She was sure that she hadn’t worn it when she had been abducted.  
She didn’t even want to think about what that meant.

“Where are we?” she asked, distracting herself from the fact that she had been changed by him.

“It’s my stepsister’s house,” he answered, guiding her into a small kitchen and gesturing to her to sit down on the small table which Felicity did. “She’s out of town for a few days, and I thought we could settle here until we found something of her our own.”

Felicity nodded, not sure what else she could do.  
His stepsister’s house. How were anyone supposed to find her here?

 

“If she dies, she will be dying, thinking I didn’t want to be with her anymore,” Oliver said.

“She didn’t think that,” Diggle assured him. “She knew that Foster had gotten under your skin and that you weren’t yourself.”

Although his friend was trying to comfort him, Oliver knew that Diggle was mad at him for saying the things he had said. If Felicity wasn’t missing, he was sure that Diggle would yell at him for being such an ass.  
But nothing was worse than the thoughts Oliver was having about this already.

“Lyla still didn’t call.”

“She will as soon as she found something.”

Oliver nodded.  
Without their IT-girl they were almost clueless where to look for her. Nobody had Felicity’s skills. So the only thing they had been able to do was to ask Lyla to use A.R.G.U.S. to find something about Foster.

He was dangerous. If it hadn’t been clear before, it would have been obvious when the police had found the dead bodies of his companions. He must have killed them before he had abducted Felicity.

His Felicity, was everything Oliver could think of. His Felicity, he wanted to wake up with every morning. His Felicity, he wanted to spend his life with. His Felicity, he wanted to have like ten more children with.

“Do you think Emmeline is safe?” he asked Diggle.

“Thea and Laurel are with her and even if Roy isn’t in his best form, I think he still would rather die than let her be taken.”

Oliver nodded. “Do you-”

He stopped as soon as he heard the familiar sound of Diggle’s phone.  
“It’s Lyla,” he said before taking the call. “Hey. Found something?”

Oliver held his breath, waiting for Diggle to tell him what his wife had found out.  
He needed to get the chance to make up for what he had done to her. He needed the chance to tell Felicity how sorry he was for what he had said. That he loved her more than anything in his life and that he needed her to stay sane.

Diggle hung up, nodding at Oliver. “I think we found her. We will meet Lyla right there.”

 

“So… Let’s talk about Emmeline.”

Again Felicity felt her heart stop. She picked in her food, scrumbled eggs. She war sure that if she ate anything, she would probably throw up immediately.

“What about her?”

“Well, we need to get her here,” Foster said. “Even if she’s not my daughter, I will love her like my own. She’s a part of you and that means she is a part of me.”

Foster put his hand on hers, squeezing with what was supposed to be a reassuring smile. Felicity did her best to answer with a smile on her own.

“I don’t think we need Emmeline. We should better have our own kids, don‘t you think?”

Please don’t throw up now, Felicity prayed quietly. Please don’t throw up.

“That will be nice,” he said, moving his fingers from her hand to her naked knee and letting it run across her naked thigh. “We could practice already and-”

He didn’t get to end that sentence. A loud noise reported that the front door was kicked opened and before Foster’s hand could move to the knife on the table, he was grabbed at the collar of his shirt and thrown across the room, bumping against the wall and sinking to the floor with a groan.

It didn’t take him out, though. Just a second later he was back on his feet, going against his attacker.

Felicity didn’t know whether she should be happy to see Oliver, worried about his bruises or terrified that he would now play out what he had planned before - killing Foster. She could tell from the look in her husband’s face that he was more than angry. Although he was wearing normal street clothes, he looked more like his vigilante alter-ego.

While the two men were fighting, Felicity just sat there, unsure of what to do. She couldn’t really help Oliver to take him down, and neither could she just go out and leave. So she stayed where she was, watching the men fight until Oliver punched Foster that hard that the stalker was falling to the floor. Oliver kneeled over him, punching him in his already bloody face again and again.

Do something, a voice inside of Felicity’s head scremed, but she found herself unable to move. She needed to stop Oliver before he was going to kill Foster and give up on everything that he had worked for so hard. There was no coming back from that.

And suddenly Felicity was moving. She was rushing towards Oliver, grabbing his upper arm moments before his fist would have punched Foster’s face again. He looked up to her immediately, breathing heavily.

“Don’t,” she whispered. “He’s not worth it.”

Oliver looked at her for a long time intensely although the expression in his face slowly softened. He was breathing heavily. Letting go of Foster's collar and letting him fall to the floor carelessly, Oliver turned his head around to him and reached out the arm Felicity wasn't holding in her hand to grib Foster's left hand, pulling the wedding band he had taken from Oliver away, saying, "It was never supposed to be yours. It belongs to me now and forever."

Getting up from the floor, Oliver put the ring back on his own finger, letting his fingertips and eyes travel about it for a short time before he turned around to Felicity and pulled her to his chest in one swift move. He moved his hands under her ass until she was wraping her legs around his waist, holding onto him for dear life.

“You’re safe now. I’m here. You’re safe,” he whispered while carrying her out of the house. She started crying, burying her face in his neck and pressing herself to him as close as possible. “You’re safe. I’m here.”

* * *

_“Yesterday is as ancient as a millennia ago, because both are forever out of reach.”  
Jarod Kintz_

Nervously he was waiting for Felicity to come home, still terrified everytime she left the house on her own. Which had happened way to often in that one week ever since the night she had been abducted. 

Their marriage had taken a serious crack to say the least. And it wasn’t because she was traumatized by being abducted to something. No, it was all because he had pushed her away and had turned his back on her.

When he had brought her home that night, he had lain in bed with her, just holding her close and letting her cry until she had fallen asleep. And even then he hadn’t left her side. He had still held her up to the moment she had turned around, pretending to be deeply asleep, but he had known that she had been awake and had needed space, so he had left the room. It hadn’t been the right moment to apologize.

Instead he had waited for her to rest a little more before he had talked to her. Felicity had listened, not even once looking at him. When he had finished, she had just nodded and said that it was okay before leaving the bedroom to get a shower.

A day later she had announced that she would replace him at QC for the time his bruises needed to heal. He hadn’t fought her on that. She had the right to take her time and space to recover from what he had done to her.

But fact was that Oliver missed her. He missed her, and he wanted to see her smile again, laugh again or even look at him again. She he had prepared a delicious dinner that they could eat tonight. They even had the house all to themselves since he had dropped Emmeline at Thea’s place.  
With Foster being locked away, he could bear to let his daughter spend a night with her aunt. Besides, Thea was able to protect her if any crazy happened.

As soon as he saw the lights of her car through the window, he got to his feet, forcing himself to stay at the kitchen island and not waiting for her at the door. Felicity needed time and space, he repeated quietly.

When she opened the door, beautiful as always, she had her head down. She didn’t look up at him, but he knew that she knew that he was there. He loved her too much to miss things like that.

“Hey,” he began, biting his lower lip like she usually did when she was nervous.

“Hi,” she answered quietly, still not looking at him. She let her keys fall into her bag and made her way to the bedroom like she had always done the last days. She had gone straight to bed and pretended to be alseep when he had checked on her later.

“I’ve made dinner. You had a long day. I thought maybe we could eat something,” he said, clearing his throat.

Felicity stood still in the middle of the stairs. “I’m not hungry.”

“Please?” he asked. “Emmeline is with Thea. I thought we could make use of that time and talk?”

“About what?”

Oliver formed his hands to fists. She still wasn’t looking at him.  
“About what I’ve done to you?”

Finally. Finally she looked at him. It was just a short moment. She just turned her head for two seconds, staring into his face blankly before turning back around, but she had looked at him.

“I’ll just go change.”

He nodded, watching her taking the last steps before turning around to the stove and making sure that the dinner was eatable one last time. He wasn’t a great cook which was why Felicity had banned him from the kitchen more than once. He was lucky that Lyla had come by to help him. From all the people he knew she was the only one apart from Felicity that could cook.

When he heard the steps on the floor, he put the food to the plates, serving them on the table. Felicity already sat there, wearing yoga pants and one of his hoodies which also was the first time in a week.

He sat down on the opposite side of the table, beginning to eat while he watched her. Ever so slowly she picked up the fork, picking in her food slackly.

“I want to apologize,” he began after a while.

“You already did that,” she said, looking down on her plate without eating.

“Yes, but I think I can’t apologize enough for what I did. So I’ll probably keep apologizing to you for the rest of our lives. Because I love you so much, and I am so deeply sorry for what I did to you. I don’t think I can ever make up for it, but I will do my best to prove to you that I love you and that I want to spend the rest of my life with you and don't ever want to leave you.”

“And there’s the problem, Oliver,” she suddenly said, raising her head and looking him right in the eyes. “I know that you don’t want to leave me again, that you weren’t planning it and you honestly regret it, but there will always be times when you will leave me because you feel like you have to or you should or you just do even if you don’t really want to.”

He reached out for her, trying to put his hand on hers, but Felicity pulled back and so did he. Even if it hurt him that she wouldn’t let him touch her, he knew that she had the right to that.

“I- I know I screwed up. I don’t deserve your forgiveness. And I don’t deserve your trust. But I will do everything it takes to earn it back. I won’t ever leave Emmeline or you again.”

“Oh, I don’t fear that you leave Emmeline,” she said, her voice harsh. “You made very clear that you would never leave her.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again. 

“Do you have any idea how much it hurts to know that the person you love can just walk out on you while you feel that you depend on him for all your life?”

“I’m sorry if it seemed that way, but I promise that it wasn’t like that. I love you, and I was already on my way back to you to fall to my knees and beg you to take me back.”

He saw Felicity furrowing her brows, trying to find out whether this was true.  
“Really?” she asked, tears forming in her eyes.

Oliver nodded. “I was. I swear to you. You can ask Thea if you want to. I’d understand. And while you were abducted all I kept thinking was that if you… died… you’d die thinking I was going to leave you.  
I don’t know how I can make this up to you. I really don’t. All I can hope for is that you might forgive me. Even if I don’t deserve it.”

“I do frogive you,” she said after a while, still looking at him. “I just need time to get past it, but I will. I promise.”

He nodded, sighing in relief. “Thank you.”

She gave him the slightest of a smile. A tear escaped her eye, but she swiped it away fast before asking, “How are your bruises?”

“Getting better,” he answered honestly, watching as she kept playing with the fork in her food. “You’re really not hungry, hm?”

Felicity ginned altough it looked sad with the tears in her eyes.  
“I’m still trying to find out if you want to poison me. I mean… you and cooking?”

He looked at her for a moment before they both burst out in light laughter.  
God, Oliver had missed this. He had’n even known how much he had missed it. Hearing her laugh. Laughing with her.

He stood up, going around the table to press a kiss to her head. Not just did Felicity let this happen. She even turned around, slid her arms around his neck and let him lift her from the floor. She wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him passionately.

Oliver let his hands run all over her small body. It had been too long since he had touched her, felt her soft skin underneath his rough palms.

“Bedroom,” Felicity grunted, pressing her hips against him, making him hard in an instance.

He didn’t let her back to the floor, instead carried her upstairs, losing his shirt on the way to the bedroom before he put her down on the bed, quickly taking off their clothes before crawling into bed with her, hovering above her tiny body. Oliver felt the urge to melt his body to hers. He wanted to show her how much he loved her, how much he wanted and needed her.

Felicity pulled him down immediately, switching positions, so she was sitting in his lap. Smirking, she pushed down, her already wet lips sliding to both side of his hard erection. The head of his cock bumped against her clit whenever she moved, and they both moaned. 

She slid forth and back four times before she got up on her knees, positioned him at her entrance and took him in deeply.

They looked at each other, nobody of them moving. Instead Felicity leaned forward, kissing Oliver with all the love and passion she had for him, pulling him into a sitting position when she leaned back again. When she started to move slowly, she pressed her forehead to his, cupping his face while Oliver rubbed his hands above her back.

It was more than sex. It was making love.

“I love you,” Oliver breathed, covering her lips with his before he let his lips run along her jaw and down her neck, so he could cuddle his head to her neck, scraping her with his stubble. “I love you, Felicity.”

The pace that she used to thrust against him increased until they were both gasping. He could feel her inner walls clench around him, and he hurried to pull his head away from her neck and lock eyes with her. He wanted to see her face when she fell apart.

She let out a loudless breath when she finally started to tremble in his arms, enjoying her pleasure. He watched her eyes go blank and her lips open in a satisfied sigh. 

“I love you, Oliver.”

And that was it. The quietly mumbled words pushed him over the edge, and he spilled his seed into her while she was riding her orgasm out.

They fell back into the pillows, holding each other even when they fell asleep a short time after that.


	16. Family dinner

“Dinner smells great,” Oliver said, walking down the stais in jeans and the same shirt he had worn when he had asked Felicity out on their first date. He knew how much Felicity loved that shirt.

“Let’s just hope there won’t be another crisis that will cause us to throw it in the garbage like it has happened to the last dinner I prepared for the Arrow Family,” Felicity answered, slightly rocking Emmeline who was sitting on her mother’s hip and happily laughed about the movement.  
Oliver smiled at the sight of his two loved ones, especially because Felicity was wearing the same dress she had when they had that fight about her head being in Central City and his head being up in his ass. It was less the memory that made him love this dress that much and more the cutout on the back which allowed him to make contact with her bare skin whenever he felt like it.

“I don’t think there will be a crisis tonight,” he smiled, slowly approaching her and softly kissing first Felicity’s forehead, then Emmeline’s cheek. “After everything we really deserve a quiet evening.”

Felicity nodded, handing over Emmeline to him when she reached out for her father, begging him to hold her. After stroking over her daughter's blond hair, Felicity moved away from both of them and went to the kitchen.

The last weeks had been hard for all of them. Originally the family dinner had been supposed to take place three weeks ago, but then Felicity’s former stalker hat beat up Oliver, Oliver had kind of left her and then she had been abducted. It had been a crazy night, followed by a tense week between the married couple. And even after they had reconciled a week after, there were still moments in which Felicity looked at him like he was going to disappear again or something. And that made Oliver feel even more guilty for having left the woman he loved so much.

Just when he was about to say something to her, the doorbell rang, and they both turned their heads towards the door.

“I’ll go,” Felicity said, slightly touching his arm when she moved past him because even when she still was a little angry at him, she just loved him too much to not do it.

Oliver smiled after her, focusing his gaze on the naked skin of her lower back. God, how much he loved her.

“Hey, did you arrange to come all at the same time?” he heard Felicity laugh and pressed another kiss on his daughter’s soft skin. He knew too well that as soon as Thea had entered the room, she would take Emmeline away from him. 

Just a second later Thea rushed into the room, making strange sounds that made her sound like she was crazy and just like he had imagined she took Emmeline and cradled her to her chest.

“Hello, little princess. How do you feel? You grew so much again. You should really stop to grow so fast… on the other hand the faster you grow the more excuses I have to spend all my money on new clothes for you. We should actually go shopping again. We haven’t for at least a week and-”

“Hi, Speedy,” Oliver interrupted his sister, trying to at least get a small hello from his little sister, but she was to focused on the baby. Emmeline was more than happy about the attention, laughing about everything her aunt told her.

Oliver had no time to complain since in this very moment the room was entered by the rest of people who were invited - Laurel and Roy, John and Lyla.

“Hey, Ollie,” Laurel said, hugging him shortly before turning to Thea and Emmeline to greet the baby she had become friends with the evening of their first attempt for this dinner.

Oliver welcomed Roy with a short hug, then hugged Lyla. When he asked where they left Sara, Lyla explained that she was sick and her parents were watching her.

When Diggle stepped forwards, Oliver tensed. Since that horrific night when he had left Felicity and she had been abducted, things had been rough between them. John couldn’t really forgive his friend for screwing things up this the woman he saw a little sister in and Oliver couldn’t bring himself to disagree on that. 

“John,” he said, shaking his friend’s hand.

“Oliver.”

“I’m so glad we all actually are here together,” Felicity smiled, crossing the room to stand at Oliver’s side. She closed her fingers around his hand and leaned her head to his biceps. Immediately Oliver squeezed her fingers and pressed a kiss to the top of her hair.

“You’re right. We rarely just spend time together. It’s always a mission,” Laurel agreed. “We should do this more often.”

“Yes, we should,” Oliver nodded. “Family time is important.”

Felicity didn’t miss the glance Diggle flashed Oliver. She also hadn’t missed the tension in their friendship, but hadn’t said anything. Things were complicated, and she just hoped that maybe this evening would make them relax.  
She looked at Lyla, who nodded slightly towards her. Felicity had asked her to have a talk to her husband about this.

“Dinner is ready, so we can actually go and sit down already,” Felicity announced, already walking towards the kitchen. “Thea, you can just put Emmeline down under her mobile.”

A few minutes after that they were all eating, talking about nothing in particular when Thea suddenly asked, “So John,  I heard you were a big Olicity shipper?”

Felicity grinned. Everyone had noticed the tension between the friends, and everyone was working on getting them back to normal again.

“I was what?” Diggle asked confused.

“An Olicity shipper. You shipped the relationship between Ollie and Felicity. You really, really, really wanted them together and you kind of saw it coming.”

Diggle snorted. “That term is ridiculous.”

“But it’s true,” Roy nodded. “You totally shipped them.”

Diggle frowned. “I wouldn’t say that.”

“Really?” Felicity asked, lifting her eyebrows. “You called me out on my slight jealousy of Sara.”

“And Oliver’s jealousy of Barry,” Thea added, knowing everything about his brother’s marriage.

“You were the one who first said out loud that Oliver loves her,” Lyla reminded.  
She couldn’t even count the number of times her husband had talked to her about the feelings of their friends to one another.

“And you knew that Ray Palmer and Felicity wouldn’t last, and she was just momentarily unavailable,” Laurel added.

Felicity could see Oliver, who had been quiet and unmoving during the conversation, wince. Ray Palmer still was a sore spot for him. She put her hand on his and squeezed it comfortingly. Oliver shot her a loving smile, brushing her temple with his lips.

“I just saw what they didn’t see at that time. It was nothing,” Diggle answered.

“Oh, come on!” Felicity rolled her eyes. “You came to me and told me that me having dinner with Ray messed him up completely and that you knew that him pushing me away was the wrong decision. Even without saying it you kind of asked me to cancle the dinner.”

“And you asked me to tell her how I feel,” Oliver finally added. “Without you I might never have ended up with her. Actually I am pretty sure that without you I would have never allowed myself to admit my feelings for her. Not even to myself. But you told me that I deserved to be happy and that Felicity was the key to that even if I denied it. And I will always be thankful for that.”

For a moment everyone on the table was quiet. Just Emmeline was making some sounds, actually starting to wince when she rolled on her tummy and didn’t manage to roll back on her back.

“I’ll go,” Diggle said. “After all I am her godfather.”

When he left the table Felicity and everyone else on the table smiled.

“Mission _Let’s get John Diggle and Oliver Queen back to being friend again_ accomplished,“ Thea whispered for everyone audible.


	17. Time apart

It had been a terrible idea, was all Felicity could think while feeding Emmeline and trying her best not to let the baby see her worry. Was it worry? Felicity wasn’t sure how to describe her feelings, but she was sure that as soon as Emmeline started to realize something was wrong with her mother, she would probably start crying. So Felicity kept smiling at the five and a half month old baby.

A week ago Oliver had come back from QC and had announced that he had to go on a business trip to Russia for two, maybe three days. He had sounded annoyed about it, and Felicity had as well not been too excited about the thought of being apart from Oliver, even if it was just for a few days.

Ever since they got together, they had never been apart for longer than a few hours. They had been working together on Arrow missions and at QC and the rare free time they had, they had spent as boyfriend and girlfriend or recently as husband and wife. Their lives had been tangled to each other’s, of course still were, but everything was different now. Emmeline had changed their lives. Felicity had to give up on her daytime work, and the days in the Arrow cave had gotten less since she could esily hack from home, and there were enough heroes in Starling City to split the team in subteams, so everyone had a little more time to lead a private life. 

So Oliver and Felicity mainly were husband and wife now which really was great, but sometimes Felicity missed the times she had spent as his partner in crimefighting and daytime business.

Oliver had suggested she would just go with him on the trip. They could do a little family holiday, their first time actually, but Felicity had refused. Emmeline was way too young for a flight across the world. Especially if it was for just two days. She could still see Oliver’s face in front of her. She knew that being apart from the two of them was like hell for him. Felicity couldn’t even think about what it would mean to be apart from Emmeline and Oliver at the same time. Up to now they only had given Emmeline away for like four nights, and everytime it had been to enjoy some marriage time.

Emmeline made a strange sound and started turning her head to either side, refusing to eat the spoon of pureed vegetables her mother offered her.

“Not really hungry when Daddy’s not here, hm?” Felicity asked. “Can’t blame you for that because neither am I. Let’s get you to bed then.”

She took her daughter from the baby chair and carried her up into the nursery. 

“You know, I’m surprised your Daddy hasn’t called all day. I mean he did call this morning, but that doesn’t count because that is already like a lifetime ago,” Felicity told the laughing baby while changing her into her pyjamas. “There was a time that we really couldn’t spend one night without each other. Even when we were really pissed at each other. Did I ever tell you that story?”

* * *

 

“I just don’t get why this is such a big deal for you,” Oliver groaned. “You said you liked that car!”

“I do!” Felicity yelled, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “I do like it, but that doesn’t mean that I wanted you to go right to the next car dealer and just buy it for me.”

“Why not? I have the money, and I like to buy you things. So what’s the deal?”

“The deal is that I don’t want you to buy such expensive things for me.”

“You’re my girlfriend. Why won’t you just let me spoil you a little?”

“Because it’s wrong! We are together for like a month, and you just bought me a present that probably cost more money than the salary I get in half a year.”

“Come on, it wasn’t that much,” Oliver brushed it aside. “Besides, your car is going to break in short of time, and then you have to replace it anyway.”

“Yes, I have to replace it, not you.”

“That’s splitting hairs!” he just said.

Felicity lifted her eyebrows. It was obvious that Oliver wouldn’t change his mind about it and neither was she. The day had been stressful, and she had been hoping for a relaxing evening, but instead had found that Oliver had replaced her red cooper by a car she had recently talk about.  
And so it had ended in this fight.

“You know what?” she said, grabbing her bag. “I’m too tired to fight with you about it, especially when I am so right and you are so wrong. You can call me when you have made up your mind and have finally come up with the right opinion.”

With that being said she left the penthouse Oliver still shared with Thea and hurried downstairs, intending to drive home, but of course only found the new car, she refused to take.

So Felicity called a cab and let herself be brought home, all the time angry about Oliver’s behavior. How could he not get that what he had done was wrong? He couldn’t just buy her something that expensive and expect her to just accepting it.

Finally at home she kicked off her shoes, lost her clothing on the way to the bathroom and took a long shower. The hot water didn’t really stop her anger, but it took some of the tension from her body.

After the shower she put on her pajamas and headed right to her bed. She wasn’t hungry, and all she wanted was sleep. Unfortunately the sight of her empty bed let her stomach drop. Ever since Oliver and she finally had find their way to each other and had started a relationship, they hadn’t been apart from each other for even one night. And she didn’t like the thought of starting now.

On the other hand giving in was no option. So Felicity lay down beneath the blankets and closed her eyes, trying to let the tiredness take over her.  
But it didn’t. Instead she rolled from one side to the other, thinking about her fight with Oliver.

Why couldn’t he understand her? Why couldn’t he understand that she didn’t want him to spend all his regained wealth on her?

Of course it was sweet that he bought her things, but Feliciy just really felt like it was wrong. Letting him buy such things for her was not okay.  
Sweet, but not okay.

Felicity sighed. Oliver was doing his best to be a good boyfriend. He really tried to do everything right with her. Maybe she should just explain to him why buying things like that wasn’t necessary.

And she should do it right now, Felicity decided, jumping out of bed and putting on sweatpants and one of Oliver’s hoodies.

She had just reached the door when it was opened from outside, and she stared into Oliver’s surprised face. He held the lock pick still in his hands.

“What are you doing here?” she asked the same time he asked, “Why aren’t you asleep?”

“I wanted to see you,” they both said at the same time.

For a moment everything was silent, and then they both started laughing. Oliver entered her apartment, kicking the door shut behind him, and Felicity jumped at him, locking her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck.

“I can’t sleep when you’re not there,” she said, the fight they had suddenly forgotten.

“Neither can I,” Oliver answered, slowly kissing her while carrying her into her bedroom. “Good thing we are on the same page here.”

He stripped her from her clothes and put her pajama back on, seeing that she was already half asleep. When he had put her underneath the blanket, he stripped himself, only let on his boxers. He then settled behind her, pressing her back to his chest and tangled their legs with each other’s. With a deep sigh he put his nose to her pulse point, enjoying the smell of her skin.

“You know, I’m not giving in on the car thing,” Felicity mumbled.

“Neither am I.”

“So we will keep fighting tomorrow?”

“No. You will sleep and then decide that I am right and you are wrong. Besides, your car is already at the scrape yard so…”

“I hate you,” Felicity mumbled, now fully asleep.

“No, you love me,” Oliver chuckled, pressing a kiss to her neck. “And I love you, too.”

* * *

 

When the story was ended, Emmeline had already fallen asleep. Felicity switched on the baby monitor and left the room quietly.

She thought about calling Oliver, but decided that he would have probably called if there had been time for that. So she just headed right to bed, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep without her personal pillow or rather blanket since most of the times Oliver slept on her, his face snuggled to her neck, his stubble slightly scratchig her skin.

Felicity missed him like crazy. She wanted to hear his voice, see his loving smile and feel his perfect body. She was so used to him being here that she literally heard his steps on the floor.

It wasn’t until the door opened, and Oliver’s silhouette appeared that she realized that this wasn’t her imagination. Oliver really was home.

With a little scream of happiness she jumped up, ran across the mattress of the bed and jumped right into his arms. Her mouth melted to his in an instant. Her legs slid around his waist, her arms around his neck while he pressed her as close to him as possible.

“You’re home,” she sighed against his lips, giving him the perfect opportunity to slide this tongue into her warm mouth.

“I missed you,” Oliver moaned, pressing his hips to her, so she could feel his erection through the fabrics that were seperating them and immediately felt the arousal in her center. "I just gave them the money they wanted to have and said that I needed to go home which I did.”

Oliver carried her back to bed, putting her with her back down and hovering over her. Slowly he stripped her off the shirt she had stolen from him and let his kisses trail from her lips to her neck while Felicity opened his white dress shirt and exposed his scared upper body.

“I’m glad you’re back,” Felicity moaned, arching her back when Oliver closed his mouth around her right nipple, cautiously sucking. Felicity put her legs back around his waist and pressed her hips against him. “Oliver.”

Her quiet moan made him trail his lips back to hers, kissing her with all the love and gentleness he had inside of him.

“The last night had been awful. I just can’t sleep without you,” Felicity told him, while working to getting him out of his pants. “And I thought you forgot about us because you didn’t call all day.”

Oliver helped her to strip the pants off, leaving him in his boxers.  
“I wanted to surprise you.”

“I am glad you did,” Felicity whispered, cupping his hard member first through his boxer before sliding her fingers under the fabric and stroking him confidently.

Oliver groaned. His head fell to her neck, and his right hand moved down to respond to her ministrations by giving her the same pleassure. He pulled the lace of her panties aside and slowly stroked her wet fold, causing her to whimper and move her hips.

When one of his fingers entered her hot core, Felicity keened while moving her hand up his shaft and right to the head of his cock, her thumb stroking over the tip, making him keen as well.

They continued that for a few minutes before the urge was too strong to wait any longer. Oliver moved his hand from her sex, pulling down her panties until they were down to her knees where Felicity could eaily slide them down to the floor while she simultanously took off his boxers, leaving both of them completely naked.

Felicity opened her legs wider, giving Oliver the best access to her center, and he didn’t disappoint her. With one single move he had placed the tip of his erection on her entrance and slid home, making both of them groan in pleassure.

Without moving their hips, they entwined their fingers, putting them to the mattress on top of Felicity’s head and locking eyes. They stayed like that for a while, still not moving, just enjoying the feeling of being one and being together again.

Then Oliver pulled back slightly before thrusting back into her painfully slowly. Felicity arched her back, her breasts pressing to Oliver’s chest. Again Oliver pulled barely out of her before burying himself into her again. Both of them breathed heavily.

“I missed you,” Felicity whispered with a smile, causing Oliver to pull out of her some more and thrusting back in a little harder then the last two times. “And I love you.”

Oliver stopped moving, looking down on her and melting his lips to hers before whispering back, “I love you, too.”

And that was it. They both started moving faster, Felicity meeting Oliver’s hard strokes half way, so their hips snapped against each other’s, the sound of their slapping skins filling the room with mixes of their sounds of pleasure.

Oliver filled Felicity completly, his cock sliding in and out of her in perfect movements, hitting just the right spots in her to make heat coil in the pit of her stomach. Her moans grew louder and higher, her eyes threatened to fall shut, but Felicity knew that Oliver loved to look into her eyes when she came, so she kept them open, focused on Oliver’s face instead.

When Oliver’s moves became that franatic that Felicity just couldn’t hold up, she put her legs higher on his waist and with his name on her lips let the pleasure roll over her, her whole body spasm underneath him while he chased his own relief, enjoying the way her inner walls massaged his aching member.

“Felicity,” he finally groaned, thrusting into her a few more times while spilling his seed into her. His arms gave in and he collapsed on top her, but instead of groaning in pain Felicity just chuckled and snuggled her cheek to his.

They stayed like this, lying cuddled to each other on the bed, Oliver still inside her while their hearts tried to slow down.

It was Oliver who lifted his head to press his lips to hers, kissing her slowly and softly again. 

“I’m glad to be home,” he whispered.

“So am I.”

“Mind if I get our little girl in bed? I had a fight with myself who I should welcome first and was actually on my way to the nursery when I thought that maybe I should let you welcome me home before I get Emmeline into bed with us.”

“Smart decision,” Felicity laughed. “Go get her.”

Later the three lay snuggled to each other in  bed, Emmeline safely lying between her parents while they all fell to sleep.


	18. Favorite Americans

Felicity was bored for like the first time in what felt like forever. Oliver was at CQ, and Emmeline was too distracted with sucking on her own feet to entertain her mother properly. Felicity couldn’t really say when had been the last time that she hadn’t known what to do. For the last months Emmeline had needed her almost every minute of the day, and the rare moments when she hadn’t, Felicity had been busy with doing her household chores.

So now she was lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling and trying to figure out what she could do for the next thirty minutes before Oliver came back who surely had some ideas to keep her busy. A smile spread on Felicity’s face thinking about all the things they could do.

Just when she tried to decide rather they should bath together or rather just have sex right away, the doorbell rang. Sighing, Felicity got up and went to the door. She didn’t really expect anyone.

When she opened the door, the man in front of it stood with his back to her, rubbernecking the neighborhood. But before Felicity could say anything, he turned around and a bright smile crossed his face.

“Antoly!” Felicity screeched, flinging her arms around the man’s neck.

“My favorite American.”

Felicity laughed and pulled him inside. “What are you doing here? Oliver didn’t mention that you were coming. I would have prepared a proper dinner.”

“Oliver didn’t know I was coming. I have to say I was a little offended that he didn’t come so see me when he was in Moscow last week. Is that a proper behavior of a friend?”

“It certainly isn’t,” Felicity agreed. “But he had his reasons. One of them is named Emmeline.”

Felicity pointed at the baby who way lying on a pink blanket on the floor. By now Emmeline was lying on her tummy, propped up onto her forearms and head deep in her neck, so she could look up at the two adults.

Anatoly said something Russian Felicity didn’t understand before pulling Emmeline up in his arms and looking her over.

“Is that really your daughter? She is so big already. How is that even possible?”

“She is growing very fast,” Felicity agreed and nodded. “Oliver has already started to throw angry glances at every boy who looks at her.”

“What’s her name again? I got the card, but I can’t remember right now.”

“Emmeline Harper Queen.”

“Emmeline Harper. Strong name. Not as strong as a Russian name, but still.”

They sat down in the living room, nicely talking while Emmeline played with Anatoly’s beard. She had always been fascinated with beards. The one time Oliver had decided to shave his stubble Emmeline had cried for hours. Felicity couldn’t really say that she didn’t understand. The stubble belonged to Oliver.

“The three of you make a nice picture,” Anatoly nodded. “I’m sorry I couldn’t come here before, but there was a lot of business going on. It’s a shame we haven’t seen each other all year.”

“Yes, the last time is way too long ago. I am very happy you are here.”

“She didn’t fall around my neck the first time I visited her,” Anatoly repeated in a whisper and smirked. “I will tell you that story, little princess.”

* * *

 

Anatoly knocked on the door and waited for something to happen.

When business had led him right to Starling City, the home of his good American friend, Anatoly had decided to at least pay him a short visit and ask how things were going. Even if he had heard that Oliver had messed up his relationship to the local Bratva members, Anatoly still owed him his life and therefore would probably always see a friend in Oliver Queen.

Anatoly knocked again. This time he heard a female voice muttering through the closed door, “You know if you wouldn’t always forget your keys, you wouldn’t have to knock all the time and would probably spare a lot of time a-”

The beautiful blonde stopped talking when she opened the door and realized that it wasn’t who she probably had expected. Her blue eyes widened, her hands hurried to pull down the hem of the shirt she wore, trying to at least cover the pink lace of her panties. She bit down on her bottom lip.  
Anatoly did his best to not burst out in laughter right away. It was a cute sight. He enjoyed the view.

“Hi,” she said, her face blushing in a dark red color. He could she her gulping, eying him as trying to figure out who he was and what he could want. “Can I help you?”

“I am a friend of Oliver,” he answered slightly frowning.

Oliver had told him that he had a sister, but as far as he knew she was a little younger and somehow different from the girl in front of him. Still she looked familiar.

“Oliver’s not here right now, but he will be back in like ten minutes,” she said, nervously jumping from one of her bare feet to the other and back. “Do you want to come in and wait?”

“That would be nice,” he said, entering the penthouse and looking around while the blonde tried to pull at every side of her hem at the same time. 

She was an interesting kind of person, Anatoly thought. She was cute, looking like an innocent angel and acting the same way by just inviting him into this place without knowing who he was. He couldn’t really picture how she fit into Oliver’s life. Maybe she was an one-night stand, but she looked too comfortable here…  
He really couldn’t say yet.

“Do you always invite strangers into this place?” he asked.

“No,” the blonde said, turning around to him and looking him up again like she hadn’t even thought about a possible danger. “But we could fix this if you just told me who you are.”

“My name is Anatoly Knyazev. I-”

“You were on that boat on the island,” the blonde interrupted, talking really fast. “You are a Bratva Captain. Oliver saved your life and then you made him a Captain  and a few years ago you helped us when a friend needed to break into a prison to get out Lyla. Hey, we met there! We sat together in a car. So that means that I knew you and didn’t invite a stranger in. Although I have to say that I didn’t really recognize you, so maybe it doesn’t count, but I’ll go with it.”

Anatoly's eyes had widened while she had talked. Looking down her tiny frame, he tried to figure out what she was talking about unless he finally realizied that the smart beauty that had manipulated the prison technology was the same woman that was now standing in front of him half naked.

“And your name was again?” he asked.

“Felicity Smoak,” she said nervously. “I’m Oliver’s girl. For tech support. And other things. Obviously.”

She looked down her body with the last word and then grinned at him.

Before Anatoly got the chance to say anything about that, the door was opened, and Oliver entered the penthouse, holding a bag from a bakery in his hands.

“Felicity, why are you not naked and in bed and-”

His friend stopped when he saw him, tossing the bag aside and approaching him.

“Anatoly!” he said, giving him a short hug. “What are you doing here?”

“Paying you a visit. And getting to know your girlfriend,” he added with a smirk to the cute, little blonde. “I have to say that you might have been replaced as my favorite American. That girl is gorgeous.”

“She is,” Oliver said, pulling his girlfriend to his side and kissing the top of her head. Immediately the girl relaxed in his arms, even letting go of the hem of the shirt. “And I like her better than myself, too. So I understand if you do.”

“For your information she just invited me into your place without knowing who I was. That might be dangerous for her one day.”

“I knew who he was,” Felicity Smoak defended herself before Oliver could even look at her. “He is Anatoly. We met in Russia. Of course I know who he is. We have been in the same car for several minutes. You don’t forget things like that.”

“She is an optimist. Always sees the best in people and doesn’t really want to see any bad in them,” Oliver explained him. “So how about a Vodka?”

“That sounds great.”

“It’s early in the morning. And we didn’t even have breakfast yet,” Felicity Smoak said frowning, just making Oliver and Anatoly laugh.

Yes, Anatoly thought, his friend should really keep that girl.

* * *

 

“And I did,” a voice said from the door frame behind her. Of course Felicity didn’t have to look to know it was Oliver.

“Oliver, my friend!” Anatoly exclaimed while Emmeline immediately reached out for her daddy.

Oliver entered the living room, taking his daughter from his friend before backslapping him and turning to sit next to his wife who melted into him like wax.

“I fear that I have to say now you are my third favorite American,” Anatoly grinned at his friend.

“How come everytime you visit us I am depreciated?” Oliver asked while rubbing his stubbled cheek to his daughter's palm, making her laugh loudly.

“I wouldn’t say it’s that bad,” Felicity assured him. “We are just way more valuable than you are and in case of fire Anatoly would definitely rather save us than you.”

Anatoly looked from Felicity to Oliver, laughing, “She wears the breeches, right?”

“At least she thinks she does,” Oliver answered.

Amused Anatoly observed how they started teasingly arguing about it, always looking so loving that someone not hearing and just watching them could have thought they were declaring their love for each other.

He could understand why his friend didn’t visit him while being in Russia. 

Вгостя́ххорошо́, адо́малу́чше. - Visiting is nice, but being home is better. There’s just no place like home.


	19. The AFTMM/O Mission

“I think it’s nice we found some time to actually have lunch together, but it’s a shame that Lyla couldn’t come,” Felicity said, smiling at Diggle and Oliver.

“Yeah, Sara’s still sick, so she wanted to stay home. But at least my little goddaughter is okay,” Diggle answered, flashing a glance into the chopper where Emmeline lay sleepingly thanks to Oliver, who pushed it back and forth. The movements had finally let their baby fall to sleep.

“And now that we are here we should talk about Christmas.”

Diggle looked at her, frowning. “Christmas is not before in three months. Why do we need to talk about it already?”

“Because it’s important that we find a day we can all spend together. I have already talked to Thea and Roy, so I know their plans, and I have talked to my mother to make sure she won’t spend the entire days with us. You know I love her, but I really can’t have her here three days in a row, always sitting by my side and everything. Our relationship lives from the fact that we live miles apart from each other… which is not the subject because the actual subject is how we get our Christmas plans to accord with each other’s.”

Diggle lifted one eyebrow, first looking at Felicity, then at Oliver.

“She’s going crazy about it,” Oliver said with a shrug. “I thinks it’s because she has too much time now that Emmeline is able to entertain herself.”

“She’s not more crazy than you were when you decided to propose to her.”

“Hey, deciding to propose to me was no sign of craziness,” Felicity pouted, boxing her friend on the upper arm while simultaneously rubbing her foot to Oliver’s calf, making him smile at her.

“I didn’t mean the decision itself and rather what he did about it,” Diggle explained, ignoring the glances Oliver shot him from the other side of the table in Big Belly Burger.

“Why? What did he do?” Felicity asked, excitedly looking between her friend and her husband. “Tell me!”

“He made it a mission, called everyone in Team Arrow in and assigned us our tasks.”

Felicity grinned at Oliver. “You started a proposing mission?”

Oliver shook his head and said “No” in the same second Diggle said “Yes” and looked at his friend with a blank face.

“Did he really made it a mission?” Felicity asked Diggle, leaning closer to him and then grinning at Oliver again.

“The hardest of all,” Diggle answered, looking around the restaurant to avoid the angry gazes Oliver shot in his direction.

“You’re exaggerating,” Oliver finally said, almost using his Arrow voice, but Diggle didn’t seem to be bothered. He just looked back with slightly lifted eyebrows, obviously sceptical.

“So… tell me,” Felicity asked, seeing Oliver gulp. It only made her want to hear about it more. How often had she seen Oliver being uncomfortable about telling something?

“The story is not that good,” he insisted, but Felicity kept staring at him, so he finally sighed and gave in.

* * *

 

“You are too late,” Oliver said maybe a little to growly when his sister entered the lair, three shopping bags hanging on each arm.

“Whoa, what’s the matter? Is there an emergency? I thought we just wanted to spend some time together,” Thea said, immediately standing still when she took in the sight before her.

Except for Felicity everyone on Team Arrow - Roy, Diggler, Laurel - and Lyla were standing in a semicircle behind Oliver. They looked a little confused, shrugging their shoulders when she shot them questioning glances.

“You look like you want to declare war on someone,” Thea said, hastily putting her bags aside and hurrying to Roy’s side. “Where’s Felicity?”

“At work. I told her to provide a new system with a few more features to keep her busy, so I could talk to you without her interrupting. Felicity can’t know about this, so I need everyone of you to make sure that nothing will seep through. Felicity. Can’t. Know. Anything. About. This.”

He stressed every word, making sure that there was no mistaking this request. If Felicity learned anything about it, he would go up in flames.  
Oliver wanted to make this right. He had done so many things that hadn’t been right. Especially with her. Now he wanted to at least do this right. He wanted it to be perfect. Felicity didn’t deserve anything less than perfect.

“I called all of you in because I need you to do a few things for me. You need to help me with something because I can’t do it alone.”

Without his Felicity he wouldn’t even be able to say something like that. She was the one who told him that sometimes he needed to admit that he couldn’t do everything on his own and that maybe he needed his friends to help.

“What is all of this about, Ollie?” Laurel asked, frowning. “Felicity said that you acted strange those last days. She thinks you are already losing intrest in her.”

“Did she say that?” Oliver asked panickedly. He had tried his best to hide the thoughts that had mixed up his head those last days, but of course Felicity had realized it. She was too smart to be fooled.  
But he really didn’t want her to think something like that.

“Not that words, but she is worried,” Laurel explained, obviously angry that her two friends didn’t get their relationship to work the way it should. “What’s going on with you? You want to dump her?”

“Are you kidding?” Oliver asked. “I want to prosose to her.”

Five pair of eyebrows lifted in surprise. Nobody said anything. Everyone just stared at him like he had just said something really, really crazy.

“You’re together for like two months,” Roy finally said, being the first one to find his voice again. 

“Two months, one week and three days,” Oliver said and nodded. “And I already know that I can’t live without her. I want to marry her, and I want to give her the proposal she deserves. And my Felicity doesn’t deserve anything less than perfect. But since perfect is a high aim, I really need your help with this. I have everything figured out and-”

He didn’t get to inform them about his plans for this very special event because Thea suddenly screeched happily and threw herself into his arms, peppering his face with kisses.

“I’m so proud of you, Ollie!” she said and smiled at him, still not taking her arms from him. “I love Felicity. She is perfect in every way. I’m so happy for you. I’ll do anything. Literally anything. What do you want me to do?”

“I need you to get Felicity to the location and up to the night of the proposal you need to distract Felicity for a while. You need to spend a lot of time with her. Take her shopping, take her to restaurants or the cinema. I need her out of the way for this, and I don’t want her to forebode anything. So… just be yourself and drag her to do everything with you.”

“Fine,” Thea agreed and nodded. “I can do that. I love spending time with her. So whenever you need time to prepare something you just call me, and I will distract her. I think I will start and ask her to do a pajama party tonight.”

“No,” Oliver simply said.

“No?” Thea asked.

“I need you to distract her during the days, not the nights. I’ll take care of her at night.”

A groaning drove his foucs to the other present people. Roy was obviously annoyed about what Oliver said, knowing way to well how Oliver and Felicity spent the night or literally every minute that gave the opportunity. Those last weeks he walked in on them being indecent three times which was the most for all of their friends.

“Roy, I need you to safeguard the location. The proposal will find place near our family’s beach house. We will visit the location together tomorrow, so we can see how you do it the best. I need you to keep away every person who wants to come near and to deactivate every possible danger.”

“Don’t you think that this is a little exaggerated?” Lyla asked. “I think Felicity will be happy about some privacy in that moment.”

“Roy will stay in the background, far away from us. Felicity won’t even know that he is there,” Oliver explained.

“Then why have him there anyway?” Laurel asked.

Oliver didn’t answer, quietly thinking back to the day he had almost lost her. He remembered how beautiful she had looked with her red dress and how fast his hearst had pounded against his ribs. And then he had sensed the danger and had pulled her into his arms before the explosion had happened. When he had opened his eyes she had been the first thing he had looked for. She had been lying on the floor, covered in grime and blood on her face.  
He felt his throat close by just thinking about it.

“The restaurant they had their first date in exploded while they were there. Nobody was seriously injured, but after that Oliver decided that it wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t been unfocused and that he should better be alone.“

“Oh” Laurel said. “Sorry. I didn’t know about that.”

“I don’t like to talk about it,” Oliver admitted. “Fact is that I want to make sure Felicity won’t get harmed again, and I still need to put all my focus on her. So Roy will safeguard this mission from the distance.”

“Mission?” Roy snorted. “Now you are really exaggerating.”

“No, it is a mission,” Thea insisted. “It is the AFTMM/O-mission just in case we ever need to talk about it.”

“AFTMM/O?” Oliver asked.

“Ask-Felicity-to-marry-me-slash-Oliver,” Thea explained. “Becuase, you know, we can’t really all say ‘me’ so…”

“Whatever,” Oliver said, rolling his eyes. “Lyla, I want you to prepare a special dinner for her. I have all the recipes she got from her grandmother. I picked a supper, a main dish and a dessert. It would be great if you could prepare them, so I can just serve them on the porch of our little beach house.”

“Sure. I’ll try to cook them and let you taste to make sure you are satisfied with the result.”

“I’m sure I will be,” Oliver said and smiled gratefully. “I would do them myself, but Felicity always thinks that I’m trying to poison her when I cook.”

Everyone was laughing.

“Laurel, I want you to help me to set up the location. We need candles, music, flowers. Everything has to be perfect, and I guess it doesn’t hurt to have some female opinion on this.”

“Sure. We will make that porch the perfect location,” Laurel said and nodded. “You have a ring?”

To everyone’s surprise he nodded.

“I bought it two weeks ago.”

“Are you kidding?” Roy asked.

Oliver shook his head. “When you’re sure, you’re sure. And I am sure.”

“Show me!” Thea demanded, but again Oliver shook his head.

“The first person I want to show this ring to is Felicity.”

The smile on Thea’s face only grew with his words. She was obviously affected by his words, and he could only hope that Felicity would be, too.

“So…” Diggle finally said. “What do you want _me_ to do?”

“First of all,” Oliver said, his voice slightly shaking “I want to ask you for Felicity’s hand. She doesn’t really have a father, and she doesn’t have a brother, and you’re the closest to it so…”

“Why don’t you ask her mother?”

“Because then I won’t get to propose because Donna can’t keep her mouth shut about something like this. I love Donna, she’s the best mother-in-law I can imagine, but she’s too much like Felicity regarding her talking.”

Diggle nodded, eying up his friend carefully before he answered, “I was always in for the two of you. I just say that if you hurt her again, I will break your neck.”

“Okay,” Oliver agreed with a nod. “But that won’t happen. I won’t ever hurt her. I love her.”

He decided to ignore the look on Diggle’s face, telling him that he still had some doubts about it. With some time, Oliver thought, Diggle would see how serious he was about this. His Felicity would never endure any pain as long as he was alive.

“What else do you need me to do?”

“Actually I need you to take care of everything here for as long as I am busy with this mission and the evening of the proposal I need you to set up the second location. After dinner Felicity and I will go for a walk. I want our private landing stage to be set up with candles and rose petals. While I will propose to her there, you will prepare the beach house, light candles and make sure Felicity and I will spend a perfect night together.”

Again Roy groaned, not wanting to hear too much about that.

Diggle nodded. “Sure. So… when is this event supposed to be on?”

“Next Sunday. So we have very little time to prepare which means that we have to work even more accurately.”

Everyone nodded.

“I still think you exaggerate a little,” Roy said.

“You will get what I’m talking about when you are in my position. Now everyone get started. Thea, call Felicity. I need her out of my way for the rest of the day.”

* * *

 

“You called it a mission yourself,” Felicity said as soon as she felt able to talk again. “That’s sweet.”

“It’s not sweet. I’m not sweet.”

“Isn’t he sweet?” Felicity asked, leaning to Diggle who just huffed a laugh.

Sure, a man didn’t want to be called sweet and even less wanted to call another man sweet.

Felicity smiled at Oliver. The way he had told that story and the way he had acted in it… She was so glad that she was married to this man.

“Too bad you couldn’t wait till that day,” she sighed, slapping her hand on her mouth as soon as she had realized what she had said.

“What?” Diggle asked her. “Man, you made us crazy about this whole proposal, and now I learn that you had proposed already? What the hell happened?”

“Long story,” Felicity and Oliver said at the same time.

They were lucky that just now the waitress came to serve their burgers.


	20. Proposal No. 1

“We’re lucky, Diggle didn’t ask any further questions,” Oliver mumbled as soon as their friend had left and took Emmeline from the stroller, putting her into his lap. “What were you thinking?”

Felicity giggled, holding up her hands in front of her in defense. “I’m sorry. It just slipped my mind.”

She hadn’t planned to tell Diggle that the big proposal Oliver had prepared with the help of his friends hadn’t been the first proposal she had gotten from him.

“You are thinking about interesting things while we are having lunch with a friend,” Oliver whispered huskily and leand forward, so nobody in Big Belly Burgers could hear him.

The sound of his voice and the darkening of his eyes made a shiver run down her spine and her memory rushed back to the evening when they were exactly two months, one week and five days into their relationship.

* * *

 

She would never - like really never ever! - go shopping with Thea again. Felicity had planned on buying one new set of lingerie to surprise Oliver and to hold up the excitement in bed, but thanks to Thea there were four bags hanging on each of her arms. Every single one was filled with sexy undergarments.

Thea waved to her one last time and then drove away. She was going to spend the night with Roy. Felicity should be happy about it because Thea being away also meant she was going to have Oliver all for herself the night, and they didn’t have to worry whether Thea could hear them - not that they really cared once they started to undress each other.

But time with Oliver all for herself was also a problem. Oliver had started to act weirdly. Those last two months had been like a dream, a really fantastic dream, but those last ten days Oliver had been brooding a lot, quietly watching her whenever he had thought she hadn’t been looking.

Sighing, Felicity leaned against the wall of the elevator. She was scared that Oliver had changed his mind about being with her. Maybe the tension that had been between them before they had started the relationship was kind of gone. Of course they were still sexually attracted - how could you not be attracted to Oliver Queen? - but it was different. Maybe Oliver needed more. Or at least something different.

Laurel had told her that whatever she was thinking was wrong. Oliver loved her, and Oliver wanted to be with her, and Felicity needed to relax and get used to Oliver not pushing her away.  
Thea had said the same although using other words.

Felicity’s heart started racing when she pulled out the keys and opened the door. They had been together for four days when Oliver had given her the keys, saying she should come and go whenever she wanted, not needing to knock.

As soon as she had opened the door, she saw Oliver. He was sitting on the edge of the table, his arms crossed in front of his chest. His eyes were focused on her.

“Hey,” she said with low voice. Her heart raced even faster in her chest. 

Was this it? Was he going to break up with her now?

Slowly she turned around, put the bags to the floor and took of her jacket. She needed some time to put herself together. She was not going to burst into tears when he broke up with her, but she already felt the tears building and her throat started burning.

She inhaled deeply and turned back around just to come face to chest with Oliver. Wincing, she took a step back and looked up to him. He was still staring at her, eyes narrowed to small slits.

Felicity gulped, breathlessly waiting for him to say something. Anything.  
When suddenly his facial expression softened, Felicity felt her heart stop beating for two seconds before it started racing again, jumping up to her throat.

Oliver cupped her face with his hands lovingly, leaning in and kissing her. It was a soft kiss. Their lips stayed shut, but Felicity could feel so many emotions in it that her head started spinning. When their lips parted, they lingered above each other’s just a breath away. And then Oliver pulled his had back slightly, looking her deeply into the eyes and asked, “Why do you think I want to break up with you?”

It took Felicity a few seconds before she could really fathom his question. She loosened her hands from his chest where they had gripped the fabric of his shirt. She tried to take a step back, to give herself some room, but Oliver still held her face in his hands. His thumbs stroked softly over her sensitive skin.

“Did Thea tell you?” Felicity whispered, avoiding his face.  
She was going to cry. She knew she was going to cry, and she really didn’t want to. She had always hated those girls that burst out crying in front of her future ex-boyfriends.

“Laurel did, Thea just confirmed,” he answered. “What made you think that?”

Felicity gulped, still not looking at him. Oliver pulled her face to his and moved his lips over hers, not really kissing her, though.

“Felicity, please look at me.”

It did take Felicity every courage she had to do so, but she did. Oliver looked worried to say the least.

“I-” she started, but her voice broke, and she just shrugged her shoulders.

“I’m not good with words,” he whispered, leaning down and moving his lips over hers once again. “So please let me show you how much I love you.”

He kissed her slowly and softly. His tongue ran over her lips, begging for entrance which Felicity allowed him by opening her lips and sighing slightly. Oliver moved closer when his tongue moved over hers. 

Felicity felt herself being lifted from the floor and put her arms around his neck. Oliver carried her bridal style, never breaking the kiss.

“I have lingerie,” Felicity whispered against his lips, halfway up the stairs.

“You don’t need lingerie to look sexy to me,” he answered huskily and like trying to prove his words he moved her legs around his hips and rubbed his erection against her clothed center. “You are so sexy, Felicity.”

He put her down to the floor again, pulling down the zipper on the back of her dress while kissing down her jaw and neck. Felicity sighed and pressed his head closer to her skin until the urge to touch his skin grew, and she moved her hands down his shoulders and to the button border of his shirt, opnening one after another and taking the fabric off him the same second Oliver moved her dress down, letting it fall to her feet.

Slowly Felicity let her hands travel over his scared upper body, fingers dancing on the burning scar on his lower back. She couldn’t say why, but it was one of his favorite scars. And yes, she knew that it sounded crazy to pick a mark of torture on her boyfriend’s body to say it was the best.

Oliver pulled down one of the strapes of her bras, his lips moving down her neck to her shoulder, placing open-mouthed kisses there while sucking her soft skin.

A few seconds later he opened her bra and let it fall to the floor to the other clothing pieces they already got rid of. Instead of playing with her nipples like he often did, Oliver pressed Felicity closer to him, her breasts pressing against his chest. His lips moved back to hers, kissing her.

“I love you,” he breathed against her lips, leaving her no time to say it back. Instead he kissed her again and slowly moved her to the bed where he laid her back down on the mattress. He then kissed down her body, taking of his pants while moving his tongue over Felicity’s belly button, making her giggle, and Felicity could say that a smile formed on his lips against her skin.

He took of their shoes, leaving just his boxers and her lace panties, and finally climbed into bed with her, lowering his lower body to hers, making Felicity moan in anticipation. She locked her legs around his waist, pulling him even closer to her.

“I love you,” he whispered again, looking her deeply into the eyes while moving his hands up her shoulders.

“I love you, too,” Felicity whispered. “And I want you. Now.”

Oliver kissed her once more before sitting back on his heels, first taking off her panties and then his boxers. Felicity reached for his erection, but Oliver caught her hand while leaning forward and pressed it to the matress on the side of her head. 

“I love you,” he repeated, sliding his erection between her wet folds. Both of them moaned. Felicity arched her back off from the bed, pressing it against his chest. “Don’t ever doubt that, Felicity.”

“Never again,” Felicity whispered breathlessly.

When Oliver finally pushed in, Felicity let out a loud groan, the fingers of her left hand closing hard aorund his hand while she pulled him down with her left hand, so their lips melted to each other’s.

Oliver set a slow and deep pace. He pulled out of her slowly until just the head was still in her, and then he pushed back in, using the same slow motions. Each time he was buried deeply inside of her, he moved his hips in a tiny circle, pushing against her inner walls and going even deeper inside.

He repeated those movements again and again, never going faster and never breaking the kiss. Felicity found herself unable to move. All she could do was letting him slowly build the pleasure inside of her and showing her approval by moaning into his mouth.

She hadn’t expected this when she had come home. She felt so much closer to him than those last days. Maybe Oliver was right, and he wasn’t good with words, but he was good at showing her how much he loved her. Because this was it. This was making love. She felt loved by him.

Oliver’s movements changed after a while. He no longer moved out of her. Instead he let his hip lowered to hers, his pelvis pressing to hers more and more. 

Both of them breathed heavily.

Felicity pulled her legs up higher on his waist, creating a new angle and making Oliver go so deep she could almost see stars. They groaned into each other’s mouth and raced towards their release.

“Marry me,” he groaned when he felt her inner walls tighten around him and stressed his words with a deep thrust.

“Yes!” she exclaimed her back arching off the bed, and her eyes screwing shut when she fell over the edge.

Oliver stopped moving, swallowing her moans by kissing her without closing his eyes. He wanted to see her, to see her face.

When Felicity finally came back to her senses, she opened her eyes and stared at Oliver who was staring right back, still buried deep inside of her. His cock still hard.

“Was that a yes to my question or a shout of pleasure?” he asked, eying up her face. “I think the context allows both interpretations.”

“Hm,” Felicity said, moving slightly and regretting it right away when she felt him moving insider of her. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Oliver asked, frowning.

“Well… Don’t you want to take it back?” she said. “I mean, you asked in a very… the time was…”

He lifted his eyebrows. “Yeah, the timing may not have been perfect,” he agreed. “But I meant it. Will you marry me?”

Felicity still stared at him. “Are you sure? I mean… the timing, and I don’t mean the sex… although that is a quiet strange moment to propose. But what I really meant was… well, I don’t really know what I meant… maybe… okay, look, I just believed that you were going to break up with me. And that is a very emotional thing. Maybe you just feel forced to ask me to reassure me, but I promise that that is not necessary. You love me. You don’t want to leave me. I get it. You don’t have to propose.”

Oliver remained moveless for a second before he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her softly. When he pulled back, his eyes locked with hers again.

“I love you, Felicity. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Please marry me.”

“You’re serious?” Felicity asked and Oliver nodded. “Wow.”

She stared up to him, nodding. Oliver pressed his lips together.

“Okay, look, maybe this is all too fast for you. I’m sorry. It’s okay if you don’t want to or need time to think about it… You can take your time. That’s okay… Although it feels a little strange because I am still inside of you and…”

“I love it when you babble,” Felicity smiled under him, breathed in deeply and propped herself up to her forearms. “I love you and yes, I want to marry you.”

One moment they were smiling at each other, and the next their lips were pressed together again and Oliver readopted his movements.

* * *

 

“We should go home,” Felicity whispered. “Now.”

“Yeah, we should,” Oliver agreed. “Right now.”


	21. Midnight Talk

Felicity woke up from the low cry that came from the baby monitor on her nightstand. Still half asleep she slid her fingertips up and down the scared skin of Oliver's back, letting them dance on the burning scar on his lower back. She loved that scar. She loved all of his scar, but something about this scar made it even more special for her. Maybe it was just the fact that the scar was so close to his gorgeous ass.

She leaned her mouth to the side and pressed her lips to his ear that was resting so close to her mouth since Oliver had draped himself on top of her. His cheek was snuggled to her chest, his arms slid around her waist and his legs tangled with hers. The first night they had slept like this Felicity had been surprised that she could even breathe, but Oliver’s weight on her tiny body felt comforting, always had.

“Oliver, Emmy is awake,” she murmured huskily, her fingers still gliding on his skin. “She probably needs a new diaper.”

All she got for an answer was a sleepy groan while Oliver snuggled his stubbled cheek against her breast and pressed his lips to her throat.

“Oliver,” she whispered again, a little bit louder this time. “Your daughter needs a diaper change.”

“So go change it,” he mumbled, simultaneously tightening his arms around her waist.

“I would if you let me go,” she whispered, slowly waking up more and more. “You just have to turn around on your back and let go of me.”

“I’m not ever letting go of you.”

Felicity felt her heart stop beating for a second.

Even a year ago Oliver would have woken up as soon as she had said out his name. Actually, he probably would have woken up from the sounds of the baby monitor. But he had gotten so used to the safty Felicity gave him that sometimes he was sleeping as deeply as a baby.

Well, not their baby since Emmeline was still crying.

“I just need a minute,” she whispered, kissing his temple. “I’ll be right back. I just gotta take care of Emmeline.”

Two heartbeats long nothing happened. When Oliver finally let out a sigh and moved, he didn’t turn around on his back like Felicity had suggested. Instead he propped himself up on his arms like he was going to do a push-up and pressed his lips to Felicity’s for a short kiss.

“Go back to sleep. I’ll take care of her.“

He then rolled out of bed and headed towards the nursery.

Felicity rolled to her side, putting her arm under her head and focusing her eyes on the door.

Looking back to those years she knew Oliver now he had really made a strong process. He had found a way, not just to not lose his soul during his crusade. He had also found a way to be Oliver Queen and the Arrow. He had changed so much and grown so much. She couldn’t even think about how things had been before they had found their way to each other.

Sure, there still were nights that he had nightmares, and there still were days he locked her out of his thoughts, but that usually never lasted more than a few hours, and Felicity was able to give him that time. She knew that he would open up if he felt that he could.

She had never expected him to become one of those always smiling people that never were sad or something. After all, he still was traumatized by what had happened to him those five years he had been away.

The difference was that now he had found a way to live with it without shutting everyone out all the time. Without shutting her out.

“What are you thinking about?”

Oliver’s question pulled Felicity back to the present. She needed to blink a few times before she could see Oliver leaning in the door, arms crossed on his naked chest.

“About you,” Felicity smiled, holding out a hand that Oliver took before sliding back into bed to her, cuddling up to her. “I’m so proud of you. Have I ever told you that?”

“Probably,” Oliver answered with a smile, kissing her softly. “But I like to here it.”

“In that case I’m just going to say it again.” Felicity framed his face with her hands, thumbs running above his stubble. “I am so proud of you. The man you have become those last years. He is an honorable, loving, really great man. And even if I didn’t know your father, I am sure that he would be proud of you, too.”

Felicity kept smiling at him before kissing him shortly and lowering her head on his pillow. Their faces were so close that the tips of there noses brushed against each other’s with every inhale.

“If we weren’t married already, I would ask you now,” Oliver whispered with a smile. “So instead I will ask you what you think about spending a few days away from here. I got everything covered already. I shifted my meetings, talked to Diggle, Roy and Laurel about the foundry, and I booked us flights to Hawaii. What do you think?”

“That I don’t really have a chance to say no?” Felicity laughed.

“So… we’re going on vacation?”

“We are,” Felicity smiled. “Our first vacation as a family. I like that.”

Oliver nodded, kissing the tip of her nose. “So do I.”

A few minutes later they drifted back to sleep, cuddled up to each other as always.


	22. Curse of the night

He hurried through the small market, searching for the chocolate chip mint ice cream Felicity was craving for. Ever since she was pregnant she woke up in the middle of the night, aching for some kind of food. She always tried to hide it from him, so he wouldn’t go out and buy whatever she needed, but of course Oliver didn’t let her fool him. He knew all of her faces and teeth biting down on her bottom lip and brows furrowed always meant that she was trying to hide something from him.

Tonight she craved for her favorite ice cream which was ironic since yesterday she swore that she could never eat it again and even the sight of the box of ice cream in the freezer had caused her nausea, so Oliver had thrown the box in the garbage.

He smiled thinking about the guilty conscience that had been on her face when she had woken him up and had asked whether he would go to the market and buy the ice cream. He had just smiled, kissed the tip of her nose and had promised to be back soon, bringing the ice cream she desired.

God, he loved her so much. He would drive across the world to get her ice cream if that was going to make her happy.

When Oliver finally found the ice cream, he sighed in relief, took it from the freezer and turned around to pay for it when suddenly Felicity was standing right in front of him. She wore one of the dresses she had bought a few weeks ago when she had been forced to accept that she just couldn’t fit into her normal clothes anymore.

“Felicity,” he said frowning. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey,” she answered, slightly staring at him while coming closer slowly. “I… I was in town for a meeting and… and I decided to stay here a little longer, maybe visit John and Lyla, you know? I didn’t really expect to see you here.”

Oliver frowned even more. “Are you sleepwalking?”

“No,” she laughed nervously. “I know I should probably be in bed and rest since I’m pregnant which you can’t really overlook thanks to my ever growing stomach, but I have cravings. I crave for sour cream which really is gross, but I can’t do anything against it, so we came here and…”

“Mommy! Mommy!”

Before Oliver could say anything - not that he knew what he should say - a little boy with short, dark hair came running towards Felicity, putting his arms around her and slamming his head to her round belly.

“Hey, sweety,” she said smiling. “See, this is my good old friend Oliver. Will you say Hi to Oliver, RJ?”

“Hello, Oliver,” the boy said, holding his mother’s hand like his life depended on it. “I’m Ray Junior, named after my father. He is a very smart man.”

“And very lucky,” a familiar voice said, followed by the appearance of Ray Palmer in an expensive looking business suit, a little girl that looked exactly like the baby he was sure he had with Felicity sitting on his hip. The little boy on Felicity’s side was his exact copy. “Hello, Oliver.”

Oliver couldn’t do anything but stare at the woman he loved and had been really sure to be married to just seconds ago. Felicity meanwhile was smiling at Ray Palmer, their children (?!) in the middle of them.

“Felicity,” he heard his own voice saying although his lips didn’t move. “Felicity.”

  
She opened her eyes with a gasp, finding herself in her bed, lying underneath Oliver who had himself propped up to his forearms and looked down at her with a worried expression in his face.

“Morning?” Felicity asked huskily, staring at her husband.

Was he her husband? She was quite sure of that now, but a few seconds ago she had thought that she was Oliver who had thought she was his wife, and she hadn’t been. Felicity had to admit that she was slightly confused about whether Oliver and she really were married. And didn’t they have a baby? The exact same baby that had been sitting on Ray Palmer’s hip. 

“It’s three in the night, so it might be a littel to early for morning,” he whispered, his right hand cupping her cheek. “You look a little spacy, baby. Everything alright?”

“I’m not sure,” she answered honestly. “I had a dream.”

“Nightmare?” he asked softly, his left hand coming to cup her other cheek. “Want to talk about it?”

“I’m not sure,” Felicity said. “And it wasn’t a nightmare. I think. It was just… weird. Maybe a little bit frightening. I don’t know.”

“You still look like you don’t know where you are,” Oliver declared. “Do you know where you are?”

“At home?” she asked.

Oliver nodded. “Do you know who you are?”

“Since I see you I guess that I’m not you which means that I am me then?”

If Oliver hadn’t been worried before he sure as hell was worried now. He pulled back slightly to take a better look at her, his hands still framing her face.

“Felicity, maybe we should call a doctor. You are kind of scaring me.”

Felicity shook her head hastily, sliding her arms around him to feel the naked skin of his chest against the skin of her arms. Naked chest was a good sign for being married, Felicity thought.

“No, it’s okay. I don’t need a doctor,” she said. “I was just… The dream was just a little strange, and I have to ask you a few things just to make sure what is real and what was part of the dream.”

“You can ask me anything,” Oliver said, nodding.

Felicity bit her bottom lip and looked at him, her hands moving above his scar covered skin.

“The two of us,” she started, narrowing her eyes. “We are… together, I guess?”

Oliver’s eyes widened in a mix of panic and something else Felicity didn’t know how do describe. “We are married. We got married more than a year ago.”

“Do we have… kids?”

“Okay, that’s it. I’ll go and call a doctor. This is not normal,” he declared, already trying to roll out of bed, but Felicity tightened her arms around his waist to keep him close.

“No, I… don’t need a doctor,” she repeated. “It’s just that dream and… Okay, so I was you. And I went to the marked to get chocolate chip mint ice cream for… for actual me who was pregnant… Can you follow?”

“You dreamed to be me and went to the market to buy dream-Felicity ice cream.”

“Right. So when I which was actually you found that ice cream I turned around to find me like dream-Felicity standing there and first I or rather you were very confused because I or rather dream-Felicity was supposed to lie in bed and I which was still you asked me or dream-Felicity-”

“How about we just stay in our roles. You say ‘you’ for everything dream-Oliver did and ‘me’ for everything dream-Felicity did, and I keep in mind that you saw all of this happening through dream-Oliver’s perspective,“ Oliver suggested and Felicity nodded, inhaling deeply.

“Okay. So you asked me what I was doing there, and I told you that I had a meeting or something and had decided to stay a little bit longer to visit John and Lyla. And then a little boy came running and hugged me. His name was RJ or rather Ray Junior after his father. And then there was Ray like actual Ray Palmer with a little girl on his hip, and it was obvious that he was my husband or whatever. At least RJ was our child, and I guess the girl was our kid, too. And I was pregnant. I assume that he was the father…  
So I am a little confused here because first I thought I was you and married to me, and then I thought I was you and not married to me and that I was actually married to Ray and had kids with him, and now I wake up and I am like 50% sure that I am me, Felicity Smoak or rather Queen because I think that we are married and we have a daughter. Emmeline. Do we?”

She had talked that fast that the sudden silence lingered in the dark, quiet room.

“And you really think being married and having kids with Palmer isn’t a nightmare?” Oliver asked.

Felicity huffed a laugh. “So typical of you to let that be the thing to bother you the most. You are so jealous.”

“Hey, I think I have a right to be jealous when my wife dreams of being married to a different guy and having children with him. Especially when the baby is our Emmeline.”

Relieved Felicity lifted her head from the pillow to melt her lips to Oliver’s, giving him a soft kiss. He hummed quietly.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered. “And I am so grateful to be married to you and to have Emmeline with you.”

“I love you, too,” Oliver whispered back, his lips moving from her mouth to her neck, sucking the skin softly. “But I feel like I have to prove to you how much I love you. Not even dream-you should forget who you are married to.”

Felicity sighed contentedly, letting Oliver show how much he loved her.


	23. Like a Goddess

“Oliver, I’m standing right in front of a mirror that kind of catches your reflection, so I can tell that you are staring at me,” Felicity said, not stopping to comb her hair that always looked so ridiculously messy after sleep.

Oliver didn’t answer. He lay on his side, head propped up on one hand, and watched her with a slight smile on his lips.

Felicity tried to ignore him, but his gaze was so focused on her that it felt like his eyes burnt into the skin of her back, leaving goose bumps wherever they slid over her body. She had never felt really confident about her look. She knew that she wasn’t ugly, but she was also very sure that she wasn’t some kind of model. Sure, Oliver always told her that she was beautiful and she believed him. He didn’t just say it. He meant it. Still, the way he looked at her sometimes - like now - was so… intimidating.

She wasn’t sure it was the right word, but it didn’t really matter.

It was hard to continue with her morning routine when she knew that Oliver Queen, one of America’s hottest men, was lying half naked in their bed, only a few steps apart from her and watched her like it was the first time he had ever seen a half naked woman.

And she didn’t even wear some of the lingerie she sometimes put on to look as hot as possible for him. No, she wore a pink tanktop and mint green panties that exposed the most of her ass. She wore no bra and no make-up, and she was pretty sure that she had a wrinkle in her face that the pillow had left their.

After Felicity had brushed her teeth and washed her face, she turned back around, planning on heading to the dressing room, but instead leaned in the door between bathroom and bedroom and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Are you going to tell me why exactly your are staring at me like this?” she asked, lifting her eyebrows.

“I’m just thinking that if I could draw, I would most definitely draw you exactly the way you look now. It’s super hot. Like a Goddess.”

Felicity remained silent for three long seconds before she asked grinning, “Goddess? Really?”

Oliver nodded.

“You didn’t get enough sleep those last nights,” Felicity laughed for an answer, shaking her head although she felt herself blushing because of his words.

She was already on her way to the dressing room, intending to put some business clothes on since she would accompany Oliver to a QC board meeting today, when Oliver suddenly turned her around and pressed her against the door frame between bedroom and dressing room. His naked chest was just inches away from her breasts, both hands put to the sides of her head.

“You look like a Goddess. A really hot Goddess.”

After all the time they had been together, Felicity still felt her heartbeat fasten by his words. She had trouble to withstand his eyes.

“So… I’m like Helen of Troy? I mean… she wasn’t a goddess, but at least she was considered to be the most beautiful woman in the world. She caused the Trojan War because Paris abducted her. She was promised him by Aphrodite the Goddess of love and beauty. Paris had to choose the most beautiful goddess and Aphrodite promised him the most beautiful woman in case he chose her over Hera and Athena, so…”

“Beautiful and hot and very smart goddess,” Oliver interrupted her babble. “How much time do we have before we have to go to QC?”

“Two hours, I guess,” Felicity responded. “But I guess Thea will come here in like one and a half, so…”

Before she could say anything else Oliver pressed himself against her, melting his lips with hers and kissing her till Felicity felt the familiar dizziness of anoxia in her head, and she had to turn her head to make his lips move from hers, giving her room to inhale deeply. Oliver’s lips traveled down her cheek, her jaw and finally her neck. His hand brushed aside the strape of her top, his mouth sucking on the sensitive skin when the familiar cry of their awakening daughter interrupted their make-out session.

“Our daughter is ruining our sex life,” Oliver murmured against the skin of her neck. “I love her, but she kind of has the habit to always interrupt in just the worst moments.”

Felicity chuckled quietly, running one hand through his short hair.

“Well, she didn’t interrupt us last night. Or last evening. Or last morning. Or the night before that. Or the afternoon before that.” She smiled about all the times they had had sex those last days. “I think we can say that we are very lucky parents.”

Oliver pulled back, only to wrap his arms around her waist and pull her flush aginst him. He pressed his lips to hers, kissing her softly.

“We are very lucky, I guess,” he smiled. “Me probably a little bit more that you.”

“Well, you’re married to a goddess. Hard to beat that, hm?” she said and smiled back.

Oliver opened his mouth to reply somthing when the cries of their daughter became louder.

“You’ll get ready, my Goddess, I’ll take care of our little one,” he said, kissing the tip of her nose before heading towards the nursery.

Felicity was sure that he was right. They both were really lucky.


	24. Something new

“Sometimes I really miss to be here,” Felicity said when they entered the elevator and linked her arm with Oliver’s. “You know, I love being home with Emmeline, but sometimes… sometimes I just miss all of this. I miss work.”

“My offer is still on the table,” Oliver explained, pushing the button for the top floor and kissing her temple. “If you want to, you can work, and I’ll stay home with Emmeline. We did it when I was injured, why not do it again?”

Felicity sighed and leaned her head to his bicep. “I don’t know. Let’s just get this behind us and then enjoy our vacation, and then we can still decide what we will-”

The elevator came to an abrupt stop. Felicity lost her balance and probably would have landed on the floor if Oliver hadn’t reacted quickly and had put his arms around her and pressed her to his body, holding her upright.

“Oh my god, are we stuck?!” Felicity almost screeched, pressing herself even closer to her husband’s strong body.

“The elevator is stuck, I guess. Yes,” Oliver said, pushing the emergency button, but nothing happened. “And the emergency button doesn’t work. I guess they will find us sooner or later. We could pick up where Emmeline interrupted us this morning and- Felicity, are you alright?”

He had tried to softly pull a few inches away, just enough to kiss her, but Felicity’s grip around his waist had tightened, and she had pressed her head even more firmly to his chest. Oliver couldn’t see all of her face, but he was sure that her eyes were screwed shut and and her breathing was uneven.

“Claustrophobia,” she said through gritted teeth. “It’s not that bad. Usually. But usually the elevators don’t get stuck, so…”

Oliver rested his chin on the top of her head and rubbed her back slightly.  
He had thought he knew everything about her. Everything. He had been wrong obviously. He hadn’t known that she was claustrophobic.

Felicity probably knew about all of his fears, but he hadn’t known hers.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked quietly.

“Because it is stupid. Nothing can happen here. I mean… unless the elevator crashes down and we-”

“Pssst,” he said, kissing the crown of her head before rubbing her back again. “You’re safe. I’m here.”

“I know,” she sighed. “Just keep talking, it helps.”

“You know, whenever I am scared I just think about Emmeline and you, and it makes me feel better right away. I picture your face in front of me, and I remember the way you smell, the taste of your skin on my lips and-”

The elevator started moving with a jar, making Felicity sigh in relief.

“There we are,” Oliver whispered to her ear when the elevator stopped again. This time the doors opened with a low _pling!_ and Felicity slowly let go of Oliver, moving the palms of her hands over her dress until she felt that she looked good enough to go to the board meeting.

Oliver hastily grapped her hand and pulled her closer to him, kissing her temple. He surely needed to ask her what else he didn’t know about her.

He wanted do know everything about her, regardless of how unimportant it felt for her.


	25. To the airport

“And I had to drive you to the airport because…?” Diggle asked after a while.

He had agreed to come by and drive them to the airport just like in old times when he had been Oliver’s black driver. Just now he was doing it because they were friends and someone had to get Oliver and his loved ones safely to the airport.

Diggle had to admit, though, that he had been a little surprised when he had turned up this morning, picking them up at their house and found that he wasn’t the only one there to drive them. Instead Roy had already begun to get all the suitcases in the trunk.

Now Roy was driving Felicity and Baby Emmeline while Diggle drove Oliver. It was ridiculous to say the least.

Oliver shot Diggle a serious glance. “I want to stay sane.”

Diggle frowned, looking at his friend. “And that means what?”

“Have you ever been in a car with those three?”

“No.”

Oliver nodded. “In that case I’ll tell you. They are singing like really, really loud. Nobody should suffer that. Nobody. And I definitely can’t stand it. Even Thea can’t, and you know my sister. If she can’t, nobody will.”

“It must be really bad then.”

“It is,” Oliver agreed with deadly serious voice.

The first time he had been in a car with Roy and Felicity, he had thought they had been drugged. He even had dragged Felicity to the hospital to make sure that he was wrong. Of course she hadn’t been drugged. So when he had finally realized that her behavior hadn’t been drug-induced, he had reasoned that Felicity was a car singer when others - or at least Roy - were around.  
Since that moment he had never been in a car with the two of them. His nerves couln’t bear it.

“And Emmeline?” Diggle asked after a while.

The cornors of Oliver’s mouth lifted slightly, thinking about how Emmeline had been back after her first road trip through Starling City with his beloved Felicity and her kind-of-uncle Roy who had already saved her before she had been born which had led them to give her the Roy-related middle name Harper.

Emmeline Harper Queen was a Daddy’s girl with all her heart.  
Just her taste in music was not exactly what Oliver liked.

“She will come to the conclusion that she can’t be with those two in a car very soon, too,” Oliver answered, bearing down the grin that was threatening to spread all over his face. “She is still a Daddy’s girl.”


	26. Favorite picture

Oliver was exhausted. And happy.  
But still he couldn’t sleep.

He had gotten used to falling asleep with Felicity right beside him or on top of him or even more frequently beneath him. In the safety of their home where he knew that it was nealy impossible to sneak in without him realizing it he was able to fall asleep and actually sleep for hours.

But in this foreign beach house on Hawaii it was kind of hard to stop worrying that maybe someone might find their way inside and try to hurt one of his loved girls. With Felicity sleeping on the other side of the bed and Emmeline sleeping in the room next door Oliver couldn't say that he wasn't in the best situation to fall asleep.

And still the worries about what could happen if he let himself fall asleep were too strong. He knew that as long as they were here, he wouldn’t get any deep sleep.

Still he wouldn’t want to miss this vacation for anything in the world. It was their first vacation since their honeymoon which also made it Emmeline’s first vacation. And it was perfect. Having both of them just for himself was perfect. In Starling he always had to share Felicity and Emmeline with Thea, and he had to work at QC and Felicity and him both did their Arrow work, so a vacation far, far away like this one actually felt like having a normal life.

With a sleepy sigh Felicity rolled on her other side, so she faced away from him, but she simultaneously pushed her butt further back, pressing it against his hip like she just didn’t want to lose all physical contact to him. Oliver put one hand to her hip, letting his fingers slide over the soft skin that was exposed between the hem of her top and the hem of her panties.

He watched her sleep for a few minutes before he took the camera from his nightstand and took a look at the photos they had taken during the last days.

Felicity and Emmeline on the plane. All three of them in the bus from the airport to the beach house. Him sleeping on the beach with a sleepy Emmeline lying on his naked chest. Felicity being sexy as hell in her new bikini while holding Emmeline’s hands and letting her tiny feet move in the water.

He stopped when he found a photo that was very intimate. At least he thought that way. It wasn’t like they were in a very private situation or anything, but still when Oliver looked at this photo, he felt like it was a private treasure that shouldn’t be shown to anybody.

Which was kind of ridiculous.

They had met one of Felicity’s friends from Las Vegas, a woman named Chloe with her husband Edward. Felicity had suggested to drink a coffee together and although he hadn’t planned on sharing her with anyone as long as they were here, he just hadn’t been able to say no to Felicity. So they had drunken that coffee together. 

At some point Edward had asked how they had met, and Oliver had told them about their first meeting at QC. Edward had taken their camera and had taken a photo of the two of them. Oliver had still been telling that story, and Felicity had watched him.

It was the expression in her eyes that made the photo so valuable to him. She was smiling at him like he was everything she needed. He probably would print the photo and add it to his private collection of photos only Felicity, Baby Emmeline and he himself were allowed to see.

He kept those photos in the safe of their living room, safely locked away, so nobody would ever find him. He liked the idea that there were pictures of his family, private moments only the three of them were allowed to see.

Smiling, he pushed one of the buttons to see the next photo. It had been taken on the same afternoon and again it had been Edward who had taken it.

Neither Felicity nor himself were looking into the camera. They had their gazes down, barely facing each other. His hand was lying on her knee. The photo didn’t show it, but he remembered very clearly that when Chloe had asked them whether they had fallen in love on first sight, Felicity had opened her mouth to answer, but he had already seen that she had been slightly nervous and would probably start to babble, so he had just put his hand to her knee and had asked her to let him answer that.

He had told Chloe and Edward, who he had grown to like in those three hours they had met, that they had had their ups and downs, that he had been an idiot for not committing to her sooner and that in retrospection he had had feelings for her from the very first moment on. Because he had had.

Definitely another picture he would add to his private collection.

Maybe those next days he would find a photo that he could put on his desk. Of course there already were a few photos. Their wedding photo, a photo of the three of them that had been taken when Emmeline had been just a few hours old and a photo of Felicity and Emmeline that he changed every other week to always be up to date with his daughter’s developement.

He could put a thousand photos to his desk, and still it wouldn’t been enough.

When Felicity sighed and turned back around to face him, Oliver hurried to put the camera away before Felicity’s arm rested on his chest with her hand on his Bratva tatoo. One of her legs found its way between his, so she was lying half on top of him.

“You’re okay?” she asked with her eyes still closed. Her lips caressed his naked skin while speaking. “You’re not sleeping.”

“Just thinking about how lucky I am,” he answered and kissed the top of her head. His hands played with her blonde curls.

“Less thinking, more sleeping. Need your full attention tomorrow.”

“You have plans?”

Instead of answering Felicity just sighed and snuggled her face closer to his neck. Her breathing was even. She must have fallen back to sleep.

Oliver didn’t wake her. He just put his arms around her tiny body and pressed her to him, watching her sleep and letting the feeling of her heartbeat against his chest relax him till he fell asleep himself.


	27. Over and over again

“Are we sure that Emmeline is safe?” Oliver asked again.

Felicity just rolled her eyes, refusing to answer the question he had been asking her at least a hundred times since they had left the Hawaiian beach house to enjoy some togetherness without their baby. So they had left Emmeline with three bodyguards who had all served in the US Army and were surely possible to protect her from any danger. Just in case Felicity had placed a GPS tracker in her baby’s clothes.

Fact was that Emmeline was safe, and Felicity planned on spending a romantic evening with Oliver. It was already dark, almost in the middle of the night, and they had enlightened a fire to spend them some light and give the atmosphere exactly the romance it needed.

The evening would be perfect if Felicity got Oliver to think about anything else than their safely sleeping baby. And she herself needed to stop thinking about her too much herself before she started missing Emmeline as much as Oliver, and they needed to go back.

Biting her bottom lip, she eyed up Oliver, who was sitting next to the fire broodily, while she stood a few meters away from him where the ocean almost ran over her feet. She needed to think about something to distract him, to make him think about nothing else but the fact that they were here alone together.

“What do you think about breakfast in bed tomorrow?” she asked, already cursing herself for that weak try.

Why wasn’t there a desk she could bend over to make Oliver focus on her ass he admired so much? Damn it! She should find a way to always carry a little desk with her to do that. It was the best way to make him focus on her and the best way to get everything she wanted from him, several mindblowing orgasms included. One time he actually-

“Did I just dream that we are married?” Oliver’s voice pulled her back to the present when his warm breath floated over her neck, leaving goose bumps everywhere it touched her skin.

“Why would you think that?” Felicity asked frowning, trying to turn around to him, but Oliver slid his arms around her waist, pulling her back to his chest and lifted her slightly from the ground. He snuggled his stubbled cheek against her face, kissing the corner of her mouth softly before he pointed at the sand.

Without realizing it she had drawn patterns in the sand with the tip of her toes. What she had thought to be bratty lines or something like that turned out to be two clearly readable words.

_Marry me._

“Oh,” she said, smiling at the words, and rubbed her face against his stubble, loving the slight burn it left on her sensitive skin.

“As far as I remember I proposed to you twice, and we got married a little more than a year ago. Am I wrong?”

Felicity sighed quietly, putting her hands on his forearms on her stomach. She could smell Oliver’s skin mixed with the aroma of the ocean. It was perfect, almost as good as the smell of his skin alone.

“No, that sums up our proposal-wedding-history quiet well,” she sighed and leaned even closer against him, her feet still tangling a few inches about the sand.

“Then why are you proposing to me?” Oliver asked softly, touching her ear with his lips and pressing them to the spot right beneath her ear to make her moan quietly. “Proposing is my job. Your job is to burst into tears, fling your arms around my neck and babble till I interrupt you to make sure that your reaction is your version of a yes which of course it is.”

Felicity snorted. “I never did that. Basically because the first time you proposed we were lying in bed after sex and the second time you did-”

“You’re right, you never did. That means you don’t deserve cuddling right now,” he interrupted her, suddenly putting her back on her feet and already stepping away from her.

“Hey!” Felicity shouted, pouting, and ran after him, jumping on his back and snuggling her face to his neck while closing her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck. “I am sure part of the wedding vows was cuddling whenever I want it.”

“No, no, I don’t remember vowing you something like that,” Oliver chuckled, massaging the underside of her thighs and bending his head to encase her face with his neck. “Although I have to say that I’d probably do everything you want me to do. Including cuddling.”

Felicity hummed contentedly, kissing Oliver’s neck before she slid back to the floor and moved around him, so they were chest to chest. She put her arms around Oliver’s neck again while he put his hands to her hips, pulling her closer.

“Would you marry me again?” she asked, sighing.

Oliver lowered his head to hers, kissing her softly. His arms slid around her waist when he opened his lips and his tongue entered her mouth, deepening the kiss. It was slow and gentle, full of love and passion.

“You need any more answer?” he asked when he pulled back, his forehead resting against hers.

“No, I got it,” she sighed. 

“Over and over again,” he still answered.

Felicity pulled back a little to look at him. She interlaced her fingers behind his neck, her thumbs moving over the short hair there.

“Are you pleased with the life you have now? I mean… before the island you have been a completely different person and when you picture all opportunities you had back then, would you still choose the life you have now?” she asked seriously.

Oliver remained silent for a full minute, just staring at her. And suddenly Felicity wondered if she had gone too far, if the question she had been asking was to intimate to ask him even though they had been together this long.

“This is not a do-you-love-me-enough-to-take-all-the-torture-again-question,” she began babbling nervously, her hands moving down his shoulders and his arms, trying to get some distance between them, but Oliver didn’t loosen the grip he had on her. “Just imagine that we weren’t togther. And there was no Emmeline. You are married to some woman, and you might have a child with her. But it’s not Emmeline and me. It just… some… people… any people. Would you choose the life as a married man again? You know what, don’t answer that. It was stupid. I shouldn’t have-”

When she tried to loosen his grip on her again, attempting to move away from him, he lowered his head again, kissing her one more time, but with a little more force than the last time he had done it.

Felicity was breathless when they pulled apart. Oliver’s gaze was burning into her eyes. It made her heart skip a beat before it started to pound so fast and strong she feared her rips would crack.

“Felicity, what life would it be without Emmeline and you? Marrying you and having a family with you was not… It wasn’t a decision to be a husband and a father. It was a decision so be your husband and father to our children. I didn’t choose a life. I chose you.”

She looked up in his eyes, holding her breath. He looked so sincere and so… she didn’t really know how to explain it. He looked like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Felicity raised onto her tiptoes to press her lips agains his firmly, framing his face with her hands, stroking over his stubbled cheeks.

“I love you,” she sighed when she put her heels back to the sand and pressed her cheek to his chest. 

“I love you, too,” he said back, resting his chin on the top of her head. “And I would definitely take all the torture again if that meant I end up with you here again.”

“You’re a liar,” Felicty half chuckled, half sighed.

“At most a little corny.”

They stayed like that for a long while, holding each other and enjoying their closeness, while the waves washed over Felicity’s proposal, wearing the letters away.


	28. Lullaby

Oliver stood in the hallway of the Hawaiin beach house they had spent the last days in, listening to the sounds that came from the nursery. Unfortunately even his super senses weren’t able to clearly listen to what Felicity was saying.

Or rather singing.

Quietly he leaned closer to the door, trying to understand any word of what his beautiful wife was singing to their daughter who made low sounds.

When he had left the house twenty minutes ago to buy some ice cream for them to enjoy, Emmeline had been asleep. She must have woken up while he had been away and now his Felicity was singing to her which was strange because he couldn’t tell if he ever had heard her sing before that.

The sound of her melodious voice warmed his heart.

Although he had been married to Felicity for one and a half years already and had become a father more than six months ago, Oliver still had trouble to fathom the meaning of that sometimes.  
He had been a bad guy in his youth, cheating and sleeping around.  
On the island he had started to kill and had continued that when he had returned.  
He had made a lot of mistakes, including hurting Felicity more than once.

And still somehow he had managed to end up here - in a vacation home with his amazing wife who sang lullabies to get their perfect little baby girl to sleep.

Even two years ago it had been impossible to think something like that. And now it was his reality. His own family. And he couldn’t wait to let that family grow even further.

He heard Felicity stop singing, instead whispering, “Come on, baby girl, daddy will return soon and I intend on licking ice cream from his abs. But you gotta go back to sleep first.”

A smile spread on his lips. Yeah, Felicity might have murmured something like that this afternoon when they had been lying on the beach, eating ice cream and a drop of it had fallen down to his chest. She had managed to bend her head down and lick it away even before he had recognized the cold substance on his naked skin. Felicity had hummed, not stopping to caress his chest with her lips.

Those first days he had refused to go to the public beach during the day. He was aware that the scars on his chest would make everybody look at him, and he really hadn’t want to be stared at. But of course Felicity had finally convinced him to come with her, telling him that those scars were a part of him, and he should be proud of what he had managed to survive. And people staring? Who cared?

Yeah, who cared that people had stared at him when his beautiful blonde IT-girl had focused all his attention on the way she had moved her soft lips on his warm, naked skin.

The memory of that mixed with Felicity’s again singing voice that sounded to the hallway and increased his need to see both of his girls, so he breathed in deeply, pushing away the memorized feeling of Felicity’s soft tongue on his bare chest, before he opened the door to the nursery.

If possible the warmth in his chest floated even deeper through his veins.

Felicity was sitting in the rockingchair next to the bed, leaning forth and back slightly to keep the chair moving. Emmeline was half sitting, half lying in her mother’s lap, looking kind of tired, but still had her eyes opened. Felicity had lower her face to the baby’s head, quietly singing for her.  
He would always remember this moment.

“Hey,” he whispered.

Immediately Felicity’s eyes snapped to his face. She stopped singing, instead smiling at him lovingly.

“Hi,” she whispered back. “Someone woke up while you were gone.”

“I can see that.” Oliver moved from his spot at the door to sit on the arm rest of the rockingchair, softly stroking his daughter’s belly. “You were singing to her.”

Even in the half dark room he could see Felicity blush. God, he loved when she blushed like this, like there was something she had to be embarressed of in front of him.

“You weren’t supposed to hear that,” she murmured, peppering kisses to Emmeline’s head.

“I’m glad I did, tough,” Oliver replied and smiled. “I’ve never heard you sing. Not even a lullaby. What was that song?”

“Brahm’s Lullaby,” she answered, snuggling her cheek to the crown of Emmeline’s head. “When I was younger, and my mom had to work late and couldn’t tell me a bedtime story, she let always play that CD with the lullabies, and this one has always been my favorite, but I guess it only works when sung by a good singer.”

“Well, in that case you are a good singer,” Oliver said, smiling and nodding his head to Emmeline, who was now deeply asleep.

“Did you get the ice cream?” Felicity hurried to ask.

“Would I come home without it?”

Felicity smiled, cradling Emmeline to her body when she got up and walked over to the crib. Oliver lowered his head and pressed his lips to Emmeline's forehead. Felicity then put the sleeping baby in the crib, focusing on not moving too fast to not wake Emmeline up.

“Good night, sweety,” she whispered, kissed her daughter’s temple and tiptoed to the door where Oliver stood and waited.

Quietly they left the nursery, crushing their lips to each other's as soon as the door shut behind them.

“There was a promise of ice cream,” Felicity reminded him, pushing him away to make sure she wasn’t distracted by his kisses. “You go to bed and drape yourself there naked. I’ll go get the ice cream.”

“Drape myself?” Oliver asked, not loosening his grip on her hips to let her go.

Felicity nodded. “Of course! You already look like a piece of art, and I will use the ice cream to… I don’t know… make you look even hotter?”

She smiled at him wickedly, making Oliver lick his lips.

“I’m looking forward to it,” he grinned. “I’ll wait in bed!”

Felicity watched as he hurried to their bedroom.  
This vacation really felt like a second honeymoon, and she hadn’t even given him his present yet.


	29. Unwrap like a present

He still couldn’t believe that the vacation was already over. It felt like yesterday that they had arrived here, and yet tomorrow they were going to leave to Starling City again where he knew he had to share Felicity and Emmeline with everyone else and especially Thea, who could be quite possessive about his loved ones. But he should probably be happy about his sister’s and his wife’s friendship instead of being all broody about it. He just didn’t really like to share Felicity’s or Emmeline’s attention with anybody, even if it was his sister.

Sighing, Oliver opened the door to the beach house after his quick security check outside. He stood still, staring at the sight in front of him while the door fell shut behind him.

“Hey,” he just said, letting his gaze travel down Felicity’s body.

He didn’t know why he sensed that there was something going on here, but something in the way Felicity stood there in the middle of the room, her blond curls falling down her shoulders and her small body wrapped in a black bathrobe made of silk told him that there was something going on.

“Tonight is our last evening here,” Felicity told him. “And I figured since this trip was your idea, and you panned everything the least thing I could do is… let’s just say give you a little present.”

Saying those last words she opened the belt of her bathrobe and let the soft fabric slide down her shoulders to drop it to the floor, leaving her in thin black lace panties and a broad red ribbon that was wrapped around her breasts, a big bow on the front.

Oliver felt his mouth go dry. Being here had been like a second honeymoon. God bless Emmeline’s sleeping habits in those last days and nights, leaving more than enough time to explore Felicity’s body all over again.

“Well, am I supposed to unwrap my present now?” Oliver asked smirking and Felicity nodded quietly, smiling back at him.

Slowly Oliver moved towards her, staying still a few inches in front of her to lift his hand and loosen the bow of the ribbon till it fell to the floor where her bathrobe already were.

“So…” he began, taking her in. “What exactly am I going to do with my present?”

“Oh, I suppose you do whatever you like to do with it or rather you tell the present what to do and it will. It will do literally everything you want it to do,” she smirked, one of her hands already openening the buttons of his dress shirt. “So… tell me what you want.”

Oliver felt himself unable to talk, already aroused by all the plans he had for her. So he just grabbed her by her hips and pulled her towards him, her naked skin coming in contact to his now naked chest while Felicity pulled off his dress shirt and let it fall to her clothes to the floor.

Their lips met in a passionate, almost bruising kiss. Felicity’s hands moved over his scarred back while his hands gripped her hair tightly, pushing her even closer to himself. Their tongues moved against each other’s, their teeth gently biting until they had to pull apart for air. Immediately Felicty’s lips were on his skin again, moving down his neck.

“Tell me what you want me to do,” she whispered against his collarbone before gently biting down and soothing the spot with her tongue. “What do you want me to do, Oliver?”

Oliver felt his brain unable to think about anything that was more than a second away in the future. All he could focus on was Felicity’s tongue on his skin and the feeling that it caused in his pants where he was already hard.

“Are you going to say anything or will you just stand there?” Felicity asked after a while, looking up at him amused. “You could just say that you want me to surprise you if you can’t think of anything although that would be strange because you are always so inventive with sex and when I had this idea, I really thought there were some things you really wanted me to do, but it looks like I am starting to babble here which really wasn’t the plan, so…”

She opened her mouth just to then press her lips together and pull them inside of her mouth, quietly looking at him.

Finally Oliver managed to put himself together enough to lean his lips to her ear and whisper, “I want you to lick my scars.”

Felicity smiled brightly, but soon cleared her thoughts to put on a more serious expression that he knew she tried to make look seducing before she said, “As you wish.”

Slowly Felicity lowered her head to the scar on his right shoulder, slowly moving her lips against his skin. Once, twice before she opened her lips, letting her tongue follow the path of it. 

Just like he had suggested Felicity caressed each of his scars, giving them as much attention as she could before moving to the next. She used doubled effort on the scar that was the result of his first fight against Ra’s al Ghul.

Oliver stood still and enjoyed how the most important person in his present and future life soothed the marks of his past. Sighing contentedly, he moved his hands in her hair again, massaging her scalp while pulling her head away from his chest and bending her head back, so he could kiss her lips.

“What do you want me to do next?” she asked, looking him deeply in the eyes.

“I want to taste you,” he whispered back and was more than surprised when Felicity shook her head. “No?”

“No,” Felicity confirmed. “This night is all about me pleasuring you.”

“But I want to taste you,” he answered, biting down on her earlobe. “I love to hear you scream my name.”

“Yeah, but when I scream your name we will have to end this night sooner than I intent to because then we will be busy trying to get Emmeline back to sleep.”

Oliver let the words sink in and than nodded. “You’re the brain in our marriage, you proved that once again.”

Felicity smiled, kissing the tip of his nose. “Yeah, well… I am… but since your mouth on me would do too much damage maybe it will work the other way around.”

Before Oliver could process the meaning of her words he felt his pants being moved to the floor and right the next second Felicity pushed him down on the couch, kneeling in front him. Her intentention became more and more clear to him, especially when she put her hands on his hard erection, making him groan and let his head fall back to the back rest of the couch.

“No underwear today. How thoughtful,” Felicity whispered while moving her hands up and down his shaft.

Right the next second everything in his mind became blank when Felicitys lips made contact with his cock, gently kissing the tip before openening her lips and closing her warm, wet mouth around him. Her head moved down till he was all in her and then slowly moved up again.

She swirled her tongue around his erection, making him moan even louder. His right hand gripped the couch so tightly the knuckles of his fingers were all white. His left hand moved to her hair, caressing her head while she continued to move her tongue around his tip, not taking more of him in.

Oliver used every bit of his control to not just push her head down or his hips up, letting her have full control of the situation and enjoying the way she gave him so much pleasure.

After several minutes he felt his self control slip, though, and moved his hip to thrust up into her mouth, not really deep, but enough for her to realize and figuring what he wanted.

“Felicity, please,” he added huskily and groaned loudly when she followed his request, immediately moving her head up and down while scraping the hot skin of his erection with her teeth and swirling her tongue around it.

Oliver felt like on fire. Her mouth on his cock and his hand in her hair were the only contacts their bodies had, but it felt like Felicity touched every single piece of his skin. He could still feel the way her lips and tongue had moved against his chest, caressing his scars. And it just made the pleasure grow inside of him.

He couldn’t take it anymore. He pulled Felicity away from him and turned her around, so she kneeled down on the couch, gasping for breath. He pulled down her panties, leaving her all naked, and bent her back forth so she was kneeling on hands and knees. He got up on his own knees, positioning himself behind her and moved the head of his penis along her wet folds.

“Lower your head and bite in the cushions,” Oliver ordered huskily when a loud moan escaped Felicity’s lip, and she slammed her hand in front of her mouth to remain silent. “We don’t want Emmeline to wake up, right?”

Felicity did what he had suggested and bit down on the cushion, and Oliver slid into her, burying himself in her wet heat with one strong thrust of his hips, making her moan again, but this time it was muffled.

Oliver stayed motionless, giving Felicity time to adjust to him and for him to regain as much control as he could to not come right away. This wasn’t supposed to end that quickly. He waited till her hips moved from side to side, giving her more friction. He then moved his hip back, pulling almost all the way out and with a sharp thrust back in.

He did it again and again, slow but powerful. Their groans were mixed with the sound of their skins slapping together. Felicity’s moans became louder and higher with every thrust. 

The fourth thrust made her walls clamp around him, and the fifth made her come, her whole body spasming.

Oliver hurried to pull out of her. He didn’t want to come just yet. He had just wanted her to orgasm before he told her the last request for round one of the night, already having plans for round two to at least five. Let’s see whether his stamina could hold up with his inventive mind.

When Felicity came down from her high pleasure, Oliver sat back, leaning his back in the cushions and picked Felicity up, moving her onto his lap and kissing her gently but passionately.

“Felicity,” he whispered.

“Hm…” she hummed against his lips, her hands massaging his neck. Her body was still trembling slightly from her orgasm.

“I want you to ride me. Hard and fast,” he requested and felt her lips curling into a smile when her right hand moved from his neck down his chest and right to his cock that was slick with her juices. She grapped it, sitting up to position it at her entrance and then locked eyes with him before she slowly sunk down on him.

“Hard and fast?” she asked smirking.

“Hard and fast,” he repeated, smirking just like she did, and put his hands to her thighs, his fingers pressing into her skin tightly when she sat up and slammed back down on him in one fast, fluid motion.

Felicity slid her arms around his neck, pressing his cheek again against her chest, making her skin burn from his stubble.

She did exactly how he had requested, rode him hard and fast while Oliver thrust up into her harshly, quickening their movements even more. It was a maddening pace. Felicity wasn’t sure if she was trembling from a new wave of pleasure or if it were their fast movements that made her whole body shake.

When Oliver’s moans got louder she grabbed his hair and bent his head back to kiss him, their tongues tangling against each other’s.

“Felicity, I-”

“Yeah,” Felicity just answered, knowing he was close because so was she.

She lowered her head to his, their open mouths moving against each other’s without really kissing, and she slammed down with that much force that it sent both of them over the edge.

They quietly moaned into each other’s mouth, their eyes still locked while being lost deeply in their pleasure and in each other. Felicity could feel his hot seed spilling into her while her inner muscles grapped his cock tightly, clamping down and massaging it in the after waves of her orgasm.

Oliver framed her face with his hands and moved her lips to his own, kissing her gently. When their lips parted, Felicity let her head rest on his shoulder, closing her arms and legs around him and sighed.

“I will miss this place,” she said and smiled against his neck, “and the amount of sex we’ve had here.”

“Night is still long,” Oliver reminded her, stroking her back. 

“Are you suggesting a second round, Mr. Queen?”

“Of course I am. Second round, third round, as many as you want.”

“As many as I want?”

“Did I ever disappoint you with that?” he smirked, snuggling his head against her face.

“No,” she sighed, kissing his neck, “but you had your troubles when I was pregnant.”

Oliver grunted. “You were insane when you were pregnant. You would have needed at least three more husbands to feed your sexual needs during those months.”

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment.  
“No, there is just you. Always you.”

She could feel his cock twitch inside of her and looked up.

“Second round?”

“Second round,” he answered shortly before getting up and carrying her to the bedroom. There were still several hours before they needed to go to the airport, and it would be a shame if they didn’t make use of them.


	30. Our way back home

“I can’t believe we’re already on our way back home,” Felicity mumbled, resting her chin on Oliver’s shoulder. “Those two weeks on Hawaii felt like they just rushed by.”

Oliver turned his head to look at his beautiful wife, not surprised that she thought the same way he did.

“We should do it again then,” he answered, kissing the tip of Felicity’s nose before pulling back slightly to smile at her. “I thing Emmy liked her first vacation.”

“She did,” Felicity assured. “I mean she proved to love the water and the sun and basically everything else.”

“And she was an angel considering all those hours she slept, giving us time for some privacy,” Oliver added, his hand slowly moving up Felicity’s thigh.

“What are you up to, Mr. Queen?”

Oliver smirked. “Hm… I’m not up to anything. My hand just feels the need to-”

Whatever sexy thing he had planned to say was silenced when little Emmeline started crying in the baby seat they had placed on the other end of the private jet to let her get some sleep.

“Looks like she thinks she spent enough time being an angel,” Felicity sighed, unbuckling her belt and moving to get their daughter.

Oliver leaned back, observing every of Felicity’s moves. She was beautiful, gorgeous, graceful. Those last two weeks had been a gift for him, just like the 19 months he was Felicity’s husband and the seven months he was Emmeline’s father. Having this little family was a gift he still wasn’t sure he deserved.

A press of two soft lips against his made him snap out of his thoughts.

“Stop brooding,” Felicity smiled as soon as they pulled apart and placed Baby Emmeline in his lap.

“I’m not brooding,” Oliver answered, earning himself a knowing look from his wife. “Maybe a little.”

Just when Felicity wanted to say something about it little Emmeline turned in Oliver’s lap, grabbed the fabric of his shirt and came to a stand, supprted by Oliver’s hand. She put her little hands to his stubble and looked him deep in the eyes.

Felicity sat next to Oliver silently and watched her daughter’s action, her heart beating wildly by the look in that baby’s eyes. Felicity looked at Oliver shortly. He didn’t seem to be any less surprised than she was.

And then Emmeline started babbling, looking at Oliver like she was having a really serious talk about something.

Emmeline had been starting to babble a few weeks ago, becoming more and more fond of her own voice and what she could do with it, but this seemed like she really knew what she was doing. Was that possible? Did 7-months-olds do that? Did they?

Both, Felicity and Oliver, held their breaths while Emmeline kept babbling. When their daughter stopped talking, instead just sat back on Oliver’s knees and kept playing with her feet like she had just discovered them, Oliver slowly turned his gaze to his wife who looked at their daughter like she was a ghost.

“What happened?” he asked, looking forth and back between his daughter and his wife. “What did she do?”

Slowly Felicity’s lips brightened in a smile. “I think your daughter just gave you a serious Daddy-you-shouldn’t-be-so-broody-talk.”

Oliver nodded slightly before holding Emmeline higher till her face was in one line to his.

“Thank you, sweety. Daddy just sometimes needs a little reminder to find his way back home. Normally Mummy does that, but it looks like you are old enough to do this by yourself now.”

And just like she understood Emmeline started laughing happily, making her parents join her in her joy.


	31. Drunk nights

“Hey, you’ve seen Felicity?” Oliver asked worriedly as soon as he found Laurel, standing at the bar of Verdant, nipping at her virgin drink.

“You’ve lost her?” Laurel asked back, slighly grinning at him above the rim of her glass. “What’s wrong with you, Ollie? Usually you make sure that Felicity never leaves your side when she’s wearing one of her short dresses with a low back cut. I saw at least ten men staring at her legs and back.”

Laurel obviously enjoyed teasing him because the sight of Oliver’s fists clenching and unclencing again and again made her smile even brighter.

“I called Thea and Roy to make sure Emmeline war asleep and when I got back, Felicity was not where I told her to wait for me,” he answered with a growl, already looking over the crowd of dancing people. “I should have taken her with me.”

“Why don’t you enjoy the evening and let Felicity do the same?” Laurel asked. “She seemed happy when I met her earlier. It’s the first time she can drink something alcoholic since Emmeline no longer needs to be breastfed. Let that girl enjoy that. I can tell that it is really annoying to be away from alcohol for too long.”

“I did let her enjoy that,” Oliver explained, giving her a look. “I let her enjoy that for half the evening and now she is so drunk that when I left to call Thea, I had to put her on one of the bar stools because she couldn’t stand on her own feet without support. What if she is lying in a corner and throwing up? What if she is out on the streets in her condition? What if someone exploits her condition to abduct her or…”

“Ollie, breathe,” Laurel interrupted him, putting a hand on his forearm. “Felicity might be a little jingled or drunk, but she is still smart enough to not do anything stupid.”

Oliver sighed. “I just want to find her and take her home. Tomorrow I will make sure the hangover is not that bed, and she will have the full day to recover.”

When he looked up he saw Laurel staring at him.

“What?” he asked.

“Nothing. It’s just that sometimes I’m still surprised by how much of a husband you have become,” she smiled before nodding to the crowd. “There she is by the way.”

As soon as Oliver turned around to look in the direction Laurel had pointed at, his beloved little blonde threw herself into his arms and his view was hindered by a mess of blonde curls in his face. Felicity had put her arms around his neck and pulled herself up, so her feet weren’t touching the floor and only because of Oliver’s quick reactions they didn’t fall down on the floor together.

“There you are!” she said, swinging her legs from one side to the other, making it even harder for Oliver to carry her because as tiny she was and as easy as it was to carry her body, Felicity moving so wildly was not easy to handle. “I have missed you. I sat there, and then you were gone, and I was looking eeeeeeeeeeverywheeeeeeere for you.”

“Everywhere?” Oliver asked with a grin. He just couldn’t help himself. Felicity with her glassy eyes and the slur in her voice was just too sweet. And the loving way she looked at him made his heart beat faster.

Felicity nodded franatically. “Everywhere, Oliver! And now you need to kiss me.”

“I need to, hm?”

Again she nodded and tried to lock her legs around his waist, but Oliver grabbed her thighs to carry her bridal style. He knew Felicity’s dress would move high enough for everyone to see the dark lace panties she had put on earlier if she put her legs around him, and he definitely didn’t need anyone to see his wife’s underwear.

That had to be a privilege for him only.

“You need to kiss me because I missed you so much,” Felicity explained, framing his face with her hands and stroking his stubbled cheeks. “I missed you sooooooo much.”

Oliver huffed a laugh when she sprawled out her arms happily, showing him how much she had missed him, before he leaned forward and kissed Felicity shortly. She pouted when he pulled away.

“That wasn’t a kiss!” she whined. “I want a real kiss.”

“Well, if it’s going this way I think I will leave,” Laurel explained.

Felicity made big eyes, looking at her friend and flailed her arms to hug Laurel, obviously just realizing that she was there.

“Laurel! No! Don’t go! Let’s have a drink together!” she called out, but Laurel just laughed and let herself be pulled into an awkward hug, considering Felicity was still carried by Oliver.

“Bye, sweety,” she said, kissing Felicity on the cheek and shooting Oliver a knowing look before she went away.

“Why did she leave?” Felicity asked poutingly, leaning her head to her husbands shoulder. “I wanted to have a drink with her.”

“I think Laurel figured that it might be time for you to go home and get some sleep,” Oliver explained softly, already moving towards the doors. “You seem a little drunk.”

“I’m not not drunk. I’m not even jingled,” she stated not really convincing since a hiccup started and her eyes were slowly falling shut. “I don’t want to go just yet.”

“I promise you that we will do this again,” he whispered into her ear as soon as they had left the club. “But it’s enough for today.”

“Okay,” she sighed.

Oliver smiled to himself. Felicity would be deeply asleep before they were at home which meant he could easily change her clothes and put her into bed beside him, holding her while she was sleeping through the night.

“You two’ve had a nice evening?” the driver he had hired for the night asked, opening the door to the backseats when Oliver came nearer.

“Yes, thanks, Scott. It was great.”

“Is Mrs. Queen okay?”

“She is just a little drunk.”

“I’m not,” Felicity sighed half-asleep. “I’m not drunk.”

Scott grinned at Oliver, who rolled his eyes before putting his wife to the seats.

“Please do us the favor and drive slowly,” Oliver asked. “When she’s drunk-”

“I’m not drunk!” he was interrupted from the inside of the car, and he just shook his head.

“She is like a baby when she is like that,” he whispered. “When you drive her around she will problaby fall asleep.”

“I will drive slowly and make a detour,” Scott promised.

Oliver slid to the backseats to Felicity’s side and just planned on putting her seatbelt on when Felicity suddenly opened her eyes and slid into his lap, straddeling his thighs.

“What are you doing?” he asked, knowing exactly what she was up to since she had that one look in her eyes that let no doubt in what she wanted.

“Hm…” she made like she was honestly thinking about the question, but simultaneously opened the first buttons of his dress shirt. “I don’t know.”

When the car started wheeling, Felicity moved in his lap, her hips pressing against his and Oliver had to remind himself that she was drunk and not in the condition to do anything like that.

“What?” she asked when she realized his hesitation and leaned her lips to his ear before he could answer. “I’m wearing your favorite lace panties. The one you love to rip fom my body with your teeth.”

Oliver bit his tongue to keep from groaning at the memory. No sexy time until she was sober.

“Felicity,” he started and put his hands to her hips, pushing her away from his lap and to the middle of his thighs. “You are..” - don’t say drunk, Oliver! - “tired.”

“And you don’t want to take advantage of me?” Felicity asked with a smirk, stroking his stubble because she knew it was one of his weaknesses. “That is so lovely.”

She leaned forward, peppering his neck with kisses, and Oliver used the opportunity to reposition her. He put one arm around her back, the other around her thighs so she was lying in his arms the way he had carried her out of Verdant.

“Close you eyes,” he whispered and pressed a kiss to Felicity’s lips before she could protest. “Close your eyes for just ten seconds to gain a little more energy for what we are going to do for the rest of the night.”

Felicity grinned triumphantly and did as he had asked. She sighed, closing her eyes, and Oliver didn’t even need to count to five before her breathing became even, and he knew she was asleep. All it had taken her was to be held in his arms and be driven around.

“Just like a baby,” he sighed, kissing her temple before pulling down the window to the driver seats and asking Scott to drive them home.

As soon as the car stopped in front of their home, Oliver carried Felicity upstairs, took off her clothes and put her under the sheets. When he moved to get rid of his own clothes Felicity grabbed his hand in her sleep and put it to her cheek, using it as a pillow.

“Don’t go,” she sighed without opening her eyes.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he promised and just slipped off his shoes and got into bed beside her. Who cared about sleeping in a suit for one night?

He lay on his side, his left hand still trapped between Felicity’s cheek and her pillow when she moved closer, wiggeling her hips against his.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he whispered, stilling her hips with his free hand.

She smiled. “It was worth a try.”

Oliver just huffed a laugh. Glad that Felicity didn’t react to the way he had said her name like she usually did - seeing it as a part of foreplay - he kissed her forehead and rested his chin on the crown of her head. He waited till her breaths became even against the skin of his neck and chest. Only then he allowed himself to close his eyes, falling asleep with the comforting smell of her hair in his nose.


	32. Training lessons

“What… are you wearing?” Oliver asked confused, his eyes roaming all over her body that was covered by tight black trunks and a pink and black tank top. He was like onehundred percent sure that it were the same clothes she had worn at the time Sara had come back and she had started to work out on her own.

Oliver stood in the middle of the stairs to the foundry, still looking confused about what his wife was doing, wearing sports clothes and standing on the training mats like she had been waiting for him to come back from his patrol.

There had been no emergency, so the two of them were the only one here. If they had needed help, they would have called the others. Lately Starling City had been one of the safest places in the world probably.

“We wanted to train,” Felicity answered like it was the most obvious thing.

Snorting, Oliver shook his head and went down the rest of the stairs. He put away his bow and quiver and started to take off his Arrow suit without looking back at Felicity.

“Oliver, we talked about this,” Felicity stated since Oliver didn’t seem to take her serious. “I haven’t been trainig since we found out I was pregnant, and Emmeline is seven months old already. I need to restart trainig, otherwise I won’t be that much of a help in the field.”

“Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!” Oliver said, holding up his hands like he needed a moment, and stared at Felicity the way you stared at someone who had just become insane. “Why would you think that you will like ever go out in the field again?”

“Oliver,” Felicity just responded, putting her hands to her hips and staring  back at her husband, but Oliver didn’t seem to mind because he just kept staring back. He had never grown fond of having her out of the safty of the foundry, but since their daughter had been born it had only become worse. She had barley been allowed to come down here to do her work. “We talked about this yesterday.”

“I thought you were joking,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders, and continued to take off his Arrow suit. “If I had known that you were serious I would have said no right away.”

Felicity raised her eyebrows. She had kind of known that this would happen. Oliver had given in way too easily when she had started talking about her wish to start trainig again. He had just said that it might be a good idea and had taken her right to bed.  
Looking retrospectively, Felicity wondered whether he had confused the training she had meant - training like fighting training for Arrow nights - with his own meaning of training which was sex.  
Really, really hot sex, Felicity added without saying a word.

“Oliver, this is important,” Felicity stated. “There will always be times that will make it necessary for me to be in the field and-”

“There will never be times that make it necessary for you to be in the field again,” Oliver huffed with a laugh, putting on his jeans and dress shirt.

“Really?” Felicity asked disbelieving. “What will we do when someone like The Dollmaker visits Starling City, and we need a bait?”

“Then Laurel will go out in the field. She is trained very well and will easily handle him.”

“What if Laurel just isn’t his taste and the killer wants to have a short, little blonde.”

“Then Thea will dye her hair blonde and do it. Thea can handle something like that,” Oliver explained.

Felicity frowned. When Oliver was willing to put Thea in the field, he really must be serious about not letting her go their. Despite Thea’s abilities to handle herself in a fight, Oliver still refused to take her with him on a regular basis. Seeing his little sister in a dangerous place, just didn’t sit well with him, no matter how often Thea proved to be well-trained.

“What if someone breaks into our house and-”

“Our home is provided with the best security equipment available. I don’t think that there is anyone who can break in.”

“Okay, now you’re being ridiculous,” Felicity said, rolling her eyes. “There are always people who are able to break through security. And if they do, it might be helpful to have at least had some training, so I can hold them back until you come in for the rescue.”

Felicity just hoped that he would fall for it. Oliver being her own personal hero was kind of his little phantasy. He liked thinking that she needed her knight in shining armor all the time and usually she liked the fact that he was thinking that, that he wanted to come to her rescue. But fact was that their life was dangerous and she knew that she needed to be able to hold herself in emergencies.  
And deep down she knew that Oliver knew the same thing. He just didn’t like to admit that there were still dangerous times ahead for them.

“Come on,” Felicity said, pushing her bottom lip forward. “Just one hour a week for the beginning. One lesson a week.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment before he sighed, and Felicity needed to bite the inside of her cheek to stop from smiling triumphantly.  
Of course Oliver couldn’t resist her for too long.

“Where is Emmeline?” he asked, slowly coming closer.

“With Thea. I wanted to pick her up after training, but you know Thea. Once she has got Emmeline in her hands, she is not giving her away again.”

“Yeah,” Oliver smiled. “We probably need to have a second baby very soon because I have the feeling Thea will make her believe she is actually her daughter one day and just adopts her without us knowing and - Got you!”

“Hey! What are you doing?!” Felicity screamed.

While Oliver had talked about the strong relationship his sister shared with their almost 8 month old daughter, he had slowly turned her around, so her back was pressed to his chest. Felicity had let it happen, thinking he would actually teach her something, but instead he had - in one swift motion - taken her hands, bent her down and slid their arms under her knees, lifting her against his chest.

“One lesson a day,” he laughed, carrying her to the stairs. “Tonight I will actually teach you two lessons. The first is never trust your opponent. The second is never let yourself get distracted.”

“Not fair!” Felicity moaned between clenched teeth. She was trying to move and to get out of his strong hold, but Oliver had pressed her thighs up to her chest, so she was trapped between his strong front and her own legs. His grip on her hands were strong and no matter how much she tried to move, it wasn’t enough to even effect him.

“Ow ow ow!” she screamed out, but Oliver just put his lips to her ears, carrying her up the stairs.

“Nice try, Mrs. Queen, but I know it doesn’t hurt. You’re just mad and frustrated,” he whispered before pressing his lips to the soft spot behind her ears.

“Guess who will sleep on the couch tonight,” Felicity pouted, not stopping from trying to get away from him which really wasn’t easy when he was kissing her like that, but she had her pride.

Oliver just answered laughing, “Sorry to disappoint you, baby, but it looks like you are going to submit to my will tonight.”

“Oh really?” she answered while they left Verdant and Oliver carried her to the car. “And how are you going to take me home? You must be insane if you honestly believe that I will sit silently beside you after what you’ve just done.“

“Yeah, I figured that wouldn’t happen,” he answered with an amused grin and shifted her weight in his arms, so he could easily hold both her arms in one hand and her body on one of his arms while he opened the trunk of the car.

“Oh no!” Felicity said, looking even angrier at him. “You are not going to do that. I swear to god that if you do that-”

But before she was able to finish her threat, Oliver had put her down in the trunk and closed it.

“I can’t believe you are really doing this!” she shouted through the glass, seperating them.

Confused she looked to all sides. Their car was a small one, this one was a rover vehicle with lots of space in the trunk and an actual window to the outside so she really could see Oliver standing behind the car, grinning brightly while he pulled out his mobile.

“Oliver, I swear to God if you take a photo of this, I will kill you!”

But Oliver didn’t let that stop him.

“Say cheese,” he grinned, took the photo and sent it to Thea, John, Laurel and - just to tease her a little bit more - Barry and her mother.

“You are not sending this to all our friends, right?” Felicity asked, hammering against the glass with her fists. “And whose car is this? Why do you have it?”

“Don’t worry. I’d never be so cruel to send this to all our friends. He waited for her to relax a little before he added, “But I did send it Thea, John, Laurel, Barry and your mother. I thought they could use something to laugh about. And to answer your other questions, I borrowed this car so I could take you home tonight.”

“You planned all of this?!”

Oliver nodded and started laughing full-heartedly when Felicity burst out in curses. He could not remember ever hearing her swear like this.

While he rounded the car to get to the driving seat, he got five text messages.

The first was from Laurel. “Deserted island - survived. Earthquake - survived. Hongkong - survived. Slade Wilson - survived. LoA - survived. Closing Felicity in a trunk - dead.”

The next from John. “She is going to kill you. And the jury will probably award her a prize for that.”

A message from Thea followed. “I already told Emmy that she has to live with me now since her father will be dead and her mother in prison for killing him. :D”

Then there was a message from Donna. “OMG! I can’t wait to visit and hear the full story behind this picture. I am sure you had your reasons. :D:D:D Love ato ll of you!”

And finally Barry answered. “:D Iris laughed so hard she fell from her chair and Cisco is doing his best to hack into the cameras of Verdant to see what you are doing there! Btw it was nice to knew you. I will probably deliver a speech to your funeral. Any wishes?”

Oliver put the mobile back into the pocket of his jeans and gazed at Felicity through the back mirror. She was glaring at him like she was trying to kill him by just looking at him.

This would probably be fun for much longer than he had thought. And he was already excited for Felicity’s plans of revenge.


	33. Mama... Smoak? Queen? Lance?

“Oh my God, she is so much bigger than the last time I have seen her,” Donna Smoak said surprised, pressing one hand to her heart while stepping nearer to where her daughter stood with the seven month old baby on her hip, walking her around to silent her cries. 

Before Felicity could say anything else, her mother had taken the baby into her arms, rocking her up and down and saying a bunch of syllables that also could have come from the baby in her arms.

“Oh, she looks like she doesn’t even remember me,” Donna said a little sadly when Emmeline seemed to be hesitating about how to react about the woman.

“Well, you haven’t seen her in almost three months,” Felicity answered. “Besides, you haven’t seen me in three months, and you don’t even say hello to me although I invited you here.”

“Oh, get over yourself, Felicity,” Donna said, waving her daughter's complains off.

Felicity stared at her mother, mouth opened in protest when Oliver stepped behind her, snuk his arms around her waist and pulled her back to his chest. He rested his chin on her shoulder and snuggled his face to hers, his stubbled cheek scratching her skin.

“Well, I got a happy screech, a two minutes lasting hug and at least ten kisses all over my face. Looks like I won.”

“You didn’t have to match with a baby or otherwise my mom wouldn’t have given you any attention.”

“Oh,” he whispered to her ear before kissing her temple. “You can have a full hello from me if that makes you stop pouting.”

“Pff,” Felicity snorted. “You saying hello does not make up for my mother not giving me any attention. I can have you any time. There is nothing special about that?”

“Really?” Oliver asked with a smirk, moving his lips even closer to her ear, so they were touching her skin when he spoke. “Last night you were saying something different.”

Felicity just slapped his shoulder, shaking her head.

“Be nice, my mom is around,” she said, already blushing.

“I think your mom knows that we are having sex.”

“Oh, I certainly know that!” Donna suddenly said. “And I am so happy for the two or rather the three of you… although Emmy certainly doesn’t know about the sex. At least not yet.  
Well and me… You know, Mama Smoak approved to the two of you from the first second.”

Felicity still felt the urge to shake her head whenever her mother refered to herself as Mama Smoak. It was bad enough being married to someone who refered to himself in third person. Ever since her mother had found out that Team Arrow called her Mama Smoak, she had grown attached to the name and sometimes used it to talk about herself.

“I have cooked dinner,” Felicity finally declared, losening Oliver’s arms from around her waist and sat down on the edge of the couch. “Thea and Roy will come by. Thea is very excited to see you again.”

Thea and Donna had met several times since Felicity and Oliver had married and at some point had just like her brother started to call her Mama.  
According to Donna she was going to be a mother to everyone who felt like he or she needed one. Oliver and Thea really had needed a mother.

“Oh, that is really nice of you, sweety,” Donna said, blushing slightly while sitting down on the other side of the little table and putting Emmeline to her lap where the baby played with her grandmother’s hair, happily taking it to her mouth to taste it. “But I actually have dinner plans.”

“How can you have dinner plans?” Oliver asked, sitting down on the backrest of the couch and playing with his wife’s hair.

“Do you even know anyone in Starling?”

“Actually I do,” Donna smiled at the two of them. “The last time I have been here I met a nice man and he asked me out to dinner.”

Felicity had to subdue a laugh when she looked up to Oliver, whose mouth was opened. He stared at her like she was insane.

She had always thought it was fun the way Oliver acted about Donna. He treated her just like he treated every other woman in his family. He was very patronizing about her and really couldn’t handle the thought of his mother even when she just happened to be his mother-in-law going out on a date.

Before anyone could say anything, the door bell rang.

“It’s probably Roy and Thea,” Oliver said, getting up to open the door.

Seconds later Thea almost ran into the room, lowering herself next to her so called Mama and hugged her tightly.

“Oh, Mama! I have missed you so much! And have you seen how much she is grown? It is insane, isn’t it? I swear, everytime I come by she has grown even more.”

Felicity leaned back and listened to Thea and Donna talking about Emmeline’s clothes, color choice and general style. Before she had seen Donna and Thea together in action she wouldn’t have believed that someone could be more insane about Emmeline’s fashion than Thea on herself. But together with Donna Thea seemed to be even more crazy about it.

Oliver stood in the door, talking to Roy without taking his eyes off where his sister, his mother-in-law and his daughter sat together. He loved having all his family around, especially considering how many of them he had lost. It was nice to know that his family was also able to grow and he planned on letting it grow even more as soon as Baby Emmeline was old enough for siblings. Lots of them. He wanted to create every mix of Felicity and himself that was possible.

The sudden ringing of the doorbell woke him from his thoughts.

“Oh, that’s my date,” Donna shouted excitedly before passing Emmeline to Thea and getting up.

“Your date?” Thea asked confused. “I thought you were having dinner with us.”

“Tomorrow, honey. Tonight I will have dinner with this very handsome man I met the last time I was here.”

“Mama Smoak has a date?” Thea repeated her question towards Felicity.

“Shouldn’t she be called Mama Queen now that all of you are calling her Mama?” Roy asked.

“No, she is Mama Smoak,” Thea insisted, waving his idea off like he had no clue what he was talking about.

Donna was already on her way to the door and Oliver was soon to follow. If his mother-in-law insisted on having a date he would sure as hell make sure the guy would treat her rightly. A little threat might help with that. He wasn’t surprised when Thea, Felicity and Roy followed him, everyone curious about who Donna was gonna date.

Everyone held their breath when Donna took hold of the door handle. Even little Emmeline seemed to be nosy because she stopped playing with Thea’s earring and instead focused on the door.

When the door finally opened and the man in front of it was shown, everyone made big eyes.

“Oh my God, Quentin! You look so nice in your suit although I wouldn’t have mind if you had worn your police uniform. I think you looked very sexy in it.”

“Thank you, Donna. You look very nice yourself,” he answered, stepping forward to kiss her cheek before he nodded to the others, standing behind his dinner date partner in shock.

“Captain,” Oliver said when he found his voice. “You and my mother-in-law?”

Captain Lance nodded. “Yes, and whatever threat you planned to drop on me you can spare your breath. I am not going to hurt her.”

“You better not,” Oliver answered before looking back at Donna who didn’t even seem to sense the tension between the two men. “When will you be back, Mama?”

“Ignore him,” Felicity said immediately before grabbing Oliver’s hand and pulling him back slightly. “Just have fun.”

“I will,” Donna answered in a happy singsong.

As soon as Donna and Quentin went to the car, Thea looked at Felicity.

“Do you think Laurel knows about this?”

“Let’s find out,” Felicity answered happily and the two women disappeared in the living room with baby Emmy.

Oliver and Roy stayed standing in the door. Oliver observed very accurately how Quentin Lance opened the door of the car for Donna, letting her climb in before he shut it and went around the car to get to his seat.

“Well, if things are continuing this way Team Arrow will soon be called Arrow Family with all the family relationships,” Roy grinned. “And Mama Smoak might soon be Mama Lance.”

Roy watched as the hands of his teacher formed to tight fists next to his hips. Oliver’s face didn’t show any emotion when he asked, “Do you remember what happened when you went swimming with Emmeline and let her play with this young boy in the baby pool?”

“You yelled at me never to let her near a guy ever again and beat the crap out of me afterwards.”

“If you don’t want me to break another few of your ribs,” Oliver said with a cold smile, “you never suggest something about Donna and Lance again.”

Without saying another word he turned around to keep his other girls company.  
Roy stayed standing in the door for a while, silently laughing about Oliver’s habit of being possessive about his girls.


	34. The word that hurts

Felicity was tired. Her feet and back hurt and she felt like she had eaten so much that she wouldn’t be surprised if Oliver was going to ask her whether she was pregnant again.  
And of course all of this was Thea's fault. When her sister-in-law had asked her to go shopping with her, Felicity hadn’t suspected that it was going to take all day. Although she should have probably known this from experience.

She opened the door with a sigh, slipped off her shoes and headed straight to the bedroom. One day with Baby Emmeline was less exhausting than a day with a shopping-addicted Thea. All she was going to do was lie down and sleep. Sooner or later Oliver was surely going to find her and take off her clothes and-

Her plan of sleeping was cancled when she entered the bedroom where she found her too handsome husband and their all too awake daughter.  
Oliver was lying on his stomach, propped up on to his forearms, Emmeline lying between his arms, giggling while her father peppered her cute face with kisses. He was so deepened into caressing the baby that he didn’t seem to sense her.

“Say it again, Emmy,” Oliver asked between kisses before lowering his lips to her face once again and kissing every spot of her soft skin. “Come on, Emmy, say it one more time. Just one more time.”

“Dadda!” Emmeline exclaimed and started giggling again when Oliver continued kissing her rosy cheeks.

Felicity slowly approached their loved ones and lay down on Oliver’s back, the side of her face snuggled into the space between his shoulder blades.

“Did you hear her?” Oliver asked her excitedly. “She said dadda. Her first word is actually daddy or at least a pre-stage of it.”

Felicity snorted, closing her eyes and pressing herself closer to the warmth of Oliver’s body.

“Oliver, I hate to break it to you, but babies in the age of seven and a half months babble which means that they use a lot of syllables that sometimes sound like words, but those are not real words because the speaker doesn’t know what it means which makes it less a word and more a-”

“You’re just jealous that her first word isn’t mama,” Oliver interrupted her. “Right, Emmeline?”

“Just keep telling yourself that if it makes you happy,” Felicity yawned.

Oliver kept kissing Emmeline’s face until he felt Felicity’s breathing even out and her weight pressing more into his back.

“Emmy, I think your Mummy just fell asleep on my back,” Oliver whispered, earning him a giggle and an enthusiastic “Dadda!”

 

If Felicity had known what struggles Oliver’s deep belief in this putative word was going to cause, she surely wouldn’t have fallen asleep that easily and instead would have tried to talk sense into her husband. 

Because it seemed like Emmeline was trying to prove to everybody her mother’s genius in the following three week, proving her knowledge about baby’s first words right. Basically every man she saw was “Dadda”. She made no difference betwen Roy and Diggle, the postman and her actual father. Even random guys in Queen Consolidated were being smiled at and called “Dadda” after.

Much to Oliver’s displeasure. With every time Emmeline said “Dadda” to someone else than him, his mood was getting more broody. And no matter how often Felicity assured him that this was a normal stage in a baby’s lanuage aquisition, Oliver just couln’t get over it.

Exactly 24 days after the evening Emmeline had said “Dadda” to Oliver Felicity woke up in the middle of the night, finding the bedside next to her empty.

Sighing, she got out of bed and sneaked down the corridor and into the nursery where she knew to find Oliver and of course she did. He was standing next to the crib, looking at their peacefully sleeping daughter.

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” he whispered before she even stepped into the room. “I just wanted to… I don’t know what I wanted to do actually. I just couldn’t sleep and…”

“It’s okay,” Felicity hurried to say. “You didn’t wake me. Although I have to say that I really can’t sleep without you, so maybe you did wake me after all.”

She realized sadly that Oliver didn’t even get himself to smile which only made her sigh. Slowly she stepped towards him and put her chin on his shoulder to watch him closely. If she didn’t knew that he was standing in their baby’s room with nothing but boxers on his beautiful body, Felicity would probably think that he was in his Arrow-gear, confronting one of Starling City’s criminals.

“She doesn’t know the meaning of dadda, Oliver,” Felicity whispered. “And she is not trying to hurt you or tell you something by saying those syllables. They are just easy to pronounce and so she babbles them. I babble a lot.”

“And everything you babble is true. It just slips your mind,” Oliver whispered so quietly, Felicity could barely hear him.

“Yes, but I am a grown-up, Oliver. I know the meaning of the words I say… well, most of the time at least. Considering how often I babble sexual innuendos without realizing it until the words have left my mouth. So…”

Not the moment for a babble, Felicity told herself silently, which made the smile that slowly spread on Oliver’s face even more surprising.

“Oh my God, you smile!” she exclaimed in a whisper. “And there I almost thought you forgot how to do it!”

“My mood wasn’t that bad.”

“It was that bad,” Felicity answered, watching Oliver bend down to kiss Emmeline’s forehead before scooping Felicity up in his arms and whispering, “Let me show you how good my mood is tonight.”

 

The next two weeks everything seemed fine - or at least better. Oliver still wasn’t as happy as he had been before, stilly broody sometimes, but luckily for Felicity Emmeline started to become more and more shy with strangers so instead of calling out “Dadda” as soon as she saw a man, she started crying now.

Of course that wasn’t ideal for either of them, but at least it spared her more thoughts about Oliver’s feelings. She had other things to think about because she was actually hosting the yearly Queen Consolidated Christmas party.  
So between thoughts about the dinner, the music and the decorations she just didn’t have the nerves for something like that.

At least the hard work paid off.

“This is by far the best QC Christmas Party ever,” Oliver whispered into her ear while they were dancing. “And all of this thanks to you.”

“It was fun,” she assured. “And I’m glad you like it.”

“But you seem to have forgotten the mistletoe,” Oliver smiled.

“Nope,” Felicity answered with a bright grin. “I just didn’t want give anyone else the chance to kiss you.”

“So you thought that through, too,” he smiled adoringly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Oliver lowered his lips to hers, kissing her softly before resting his chin on the top of her head and sighing.

They danced like that for a while before Oliver needed to talk to some people and Felicity decided to be a good host and talk to some of their guests, too.  
She had just seen a former colleague from the IT-department when she heard someone calling out her name behind her and turned around.

Thea hurried to her, a crying Emmeline in her arms.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, giving the baby to her mother, “I tried everything. I sang, Roy sang, we told her a story, we tried everything. She just doesn’t want to stop crying, and we couldn’t get you on the phone.”

Thea had suggested to watch Emmeline since she wouldn’t let herself be calmed by strangers right now and they didn’t really have a permanent babysitter they could ask to take care of her for the evening. So Thea and Roy skipped the Christmas Party to spend time with Emmeline.  
At least that was what was supposed to happen.

“Okay, can you please look for Oliver and tell him that I will go home?” Felicity asked, rocking Emmeline back and forth in her arms while Thea went to talk to her brother.

Felicity started slowly walking, trying to calm Emmeline, but there didn’t seem to be an end to her crying. Big tears were running down her cheeks, dropping on Felicity’s chest. 

“Someone looks unhappy,” she heard a voice say behind her and turned around to find a face she knew all too well smiling at her.

“Ray,” she said. “It’s nice to see you again. Didn’t you say you couldn’t make it?”

“Well, that’s what I thought, but I took a private… flight if you know what I mean,” he answered with a grin that left no doubt that he had used his A.T.O.M. suit to make it to the party. “But what’s going on with that little princess?”

“I fear she is getting sick. And she is shy with strangers which makes her presence here even more difficult,” Felicity answered, stroking Emmeline’s back.

“Maybe I can help,” Ray offered, stepping closer and lowering his face to Emmeline’s before Felicity could hold him back.

The next second he was performing some kind of trick with a lot of colorful cloths, smiling and talking to Emmeline like it was the most normal thing in the world. And Felicity couldn’t say what it was, but at least it made Emmeline stop crying and instead the little baby started giggling.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Oliver asked as soon as he had approached them. “Thea said she’s crying.”

“She was, but Ray helped,” Felicity answered.

“Ray,” Oliver said, his voice sounding tense. “It’s nice to see you again.”

Felicity knew it was a lie. A few months ago Oliver had been really jealous just because she had talked to him and even though he had been standing right beside her and Baby Emmeline had been present, too.

While she thought back on that afternoon Felicity watched Emmeline. Her big blue eyes were focused on Ray, excitedly waiting for a the magician to do some more magic. And then her eyes lit up and Felicity just sent a silent prayer to heaven that what she assumed would be happening wouldn’t be happening - unsuccessfully.

“Dadda!” Emmeline exclaimed laughing, reaching out for Ray to take her.

An uncomfortable moment of silence started. Even without looking Felicity knew that Oliver tensed beside her. After all Ray was still a sore point to him. And Emmeline saying what he assumed was her version of daddy only made it worse.

“I promise I had nothing to do with it… or rather her,” Ray said, lifting his hands like an arrested prisoner. 

“You should take her home,” Oliver said, ignoring Ray completely. “I’ll come home when the party is over.”

Without so much as looking at his wife or his daughter again, Oliver turned around and left while Thea, Ray and Felicity watched him.

 

Oliver didn’t come home that night. Instead he sent a text message, telling her that he had some Arrow business to do. Felicity knew it was a lie since her tablet hadn’t announced any alarm.

From that night on Oliver spent more and more time in the company or the Arrow cave, claiming to have a lot of work to do in both his jobs. 

The only good in all of this seemed to be that it couldn’t get any worse.

At least Felicity could convince him to spend the Christmas holidays with his family and not let those days being interrupted by criminals or files.  
Oliver obviously enjoyed spending time with them again. He barley let Emmeline out of his arms, always kissing and hugging her and only gave her to Barry, Iris, Caitlin or Cisco after Felicity had forced him to let their guests have some fun with the baby. And even then he watched closely how his daughter was treated.

“Relax, daddy,” Felicity laughed when she saw him tense after Cisco almost dropped Emmeline who struggled wildly in his arms. She took his right hand and covered it with her own. “She missed you, you know.”

Oliver looked at her immediately, smiling softly. “I know. I just… I had some things to think about and… It was ridiculous, and I’m sorry for leaving you alone like this.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Well, as long as you are back now, I’m okay with it. But you know that it really is ridiculous that you freak out about a little babbling like that, right?”

“Right,” Oliver assured, shooting Diggle a short glance before looking back at her. “Someone might have pointed it out to me.”

When Oliver lowered his head to her neck, softly kissing her pulse point Felicity looked over to where John sat with Sara in his lap and mouthed a “Thank you” to her friend. She knew if there was someone who could give Oliver an advice in fatherly questions it was John.

 

It wasn’t long after New Year’s Eve that Emmeline really fell ill.

It started with a fever in the middle of the night, followed by coughing and sneezing and according to the doctor even an acute ear. And all of that meant that Emmeline was really unhappy, basically crying all night.

And she had of course picked the worst moment ever to be sick because Oliver was in Gotham, finalizing some deal with Bruce Wayne which meant that Felicity was all alone with her, being on the edge of her energy.

She couldn’t say when she had slept or eaten last, let alone taken a shower or even changed her clothes. She remembered that she had put on one of Oliver’s dress shirts the first night he had been away and now she was still wearing it although it was covered with diverse liquids, including snot, tears and spittle.

“Come on, Emmy, you’ve been crying for hours. You need to get tired,” Felicity sighed, walking back and forth in the house with her eyes closed to try calming Emmeline, but it seemed pointless. The little girl was still crying, screaming actually. “I know you are in pain, but could you please, please, please try and calm down. Please.”

“Dadda!”

“Daddy comes back tomorrow, sweety,” Felicity sighed.

“Actually I came back sooner to help you out,” Oliver suddenly said, causing Felicity to spin around and look at him with tired eyes. “Baby, you look awful.”

“You are an evil husband,” Felicity said, hurrying towards him to give Emmeline to him.

“Dadda,” she less exclaimed than sighed, forming her hands to fists in his dress shirt.

“You should go to bed,” Oliver suggested towards Felicity, slowly rubbing Emmeline’s back. “You will probably be sick soon, too.”

Felicity nodded, turning towards the bedroom, only turning around and leaning in the door when she heard Oliver mumble soft words to their daughter that immediately calmed down. 

“Hey,” she whispered, waiting for Oliver to look at her before she continued. “I think she finally figured it out.”

“Figured out what exactly?”

“The meaning of daddy,” Felicity answered with a smile. “Since you left she looked at me with this questioning expression in her eyes, saying that word. And she haven’t said it to anyone else since you left. So… I think it might actually count as her first word.”

Although she was tired and exhausted and probably falling sick, Felicity smiled when she saw the expression in Oliver’s face, looking like it was Christmas again. 


	35. Sick Felicity

“So Felicity’s still not getting better?” Thea asked, lifting Emmeline from the floor to let her sit on her hip. The baby’s face immediately snuggled up to her aunt’s shoulder.

“No,” Oliver sighed and closed the little bag he had packed with Emmeline’s stuff. “And the doctor said if we want to avoid that Emmy contracts the disease again we need to keep her far from Felicity.”

“Poor thing,” Thea said, kissing Emmeline’s temple. “I’m sure mommy und daddy will miss you a lot, but I guess the two of us will have fun, right?”

As if Emmeline understood exactly what her aunt had just said, she smiled brightly and wiggled with her arms and legs excitedly before adding a happy “Dadda” in the mix of giggles that escaped her lips.

“Okay,” Oliver said, handing his sister the bag and putting on a serious expression. “Before you go a few hints about how you need to handle her. Firstly, she needs to be put to bed at seven p.m.. If you do it earlier, she will be awake way too early the next morning and if she’s in bed too late, she will cry and not fall asleep for another hour. If she can’t fall asleep immediately, sing her a song or tell her a story. She likes Taylor Swift and fairytales with princesses. When she’s awake, she will play a lot. She started crawling a while ago and tries to pull herself up on everything in her reach. She is a little shy with strangers right now, so don’t introduce her to someone new. Oh, and if she does start crying, all you have to do is rock her back and forth and play-“

“Play her some of the voicemail Felicity and you have left me, so she won’t miss the two of you that much,” Thea finished the sentence with a roll of her eyes. “Ollie, I’m not taking care of her for the first time. I know my little niece. So you wanna say goodbye to her?”

Sighing, Oliver took Emmeline from his sister, holding the baby against his chest and kissing her temple before pulling back and whispering, “Don’t worry, Emmeline. You will be back with us before Aunt Thea turns you into her little twin. Two nights and you will be back with mommy and daddy.”

“Dada?” Emmeline asked with big eyes and Oliver nodded, giving his daughter to Thea again.

“Are you sure two nights will be enough?” Thea asked, earning her a look from his brother. “I’m just worried that Emmy will contract the disease again… And I have already planned the whole week.”

“Two days will be enough. Felicity will get better soon and the only reason we have Emmeline moving out is to give her a little break on all the germs floating around. Besides, I need to take care of Felicity right now.”

Thea nodded. “I’ll take good care of her, and I promise I’ll call if there is something wrong with her. Tell Felicity to get better soon.”

Oliver watched his sister leave with his daughter, feeling his heart drop a little in his chest. Although Emmeline had spent several nights away from him he still couldn’t get used to the feeling. He still remembered the day she had been born and still saw her as the same little bundle of human being that she had been then.

A dry cough pulled him back to the present, announcing that Felicity had woken up. He turned on his heels immediately, taking the pot of fresh tea he had just scalded for her and went upstairs to see whether Felicity needed something more.

When he opened the door, the only part of her he could see was a strand of her blonde hair that had snuck its way out from under the blanket. The rest of Felicity’s body was hidden under it. He could see from the form that she had rolled herself together, probably trying to keep as warm as possible. This morning the fever had been really bad and had finally given the last push to move Emmeline out of the house for a while.

Oliver placed the teapot on her nightstand before sitting down on the edge of the mattress and running one hand above the silhouette of her body. He didn’t get an answer, but he could feel her body shaking underneath the thick blanket, and he was sure it wasn’t from the cold alone.

“Felicity, are you crying?” he asked worriedly, waiting for an answer he didn’t get before pulling back the blanket, revealing her to him.

Her cheeks her reddened, the rest of her face slightly paler than usual. There were dark shadows under her puffy eyes. And it seemed like it wasn’t just the infection that had caused the last.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked immediately, slipping his shoes off and sliding into the bed with her. Felicity moved closer to him, rested her head on his shoulder and grabbed the fabric of his grey hoody.

“Earache,” she mumbled, hiding her face in the crock of his neck and sobbed quietly. “I hate earache.”

Oliver rubbed her back comfortingly and tightened his hold on her. He knew that Felicity was not someone who couldn’t stand a little pain, so it had to be really bad. He didn’t like the fact that she was in pain, especially when there was nothing he could do to ease it for her.

“You still have a temperature,” he whispered after kissing her forehead. “Shall I get you the pills I got this morning?”

He felt Felicity shake her head and continued rubbing her back, thinking about what else he could do to help her.

The last time he had seen her crying had been so different. She had been three months pregnant and the hormones had taken over her body which had made her a helpless victim of her body. He had come home from work one night to find her crouched down on the couch crying. Oliver had thought of the worst since their lives had never settled for easy, but Felicity had explained to him that nothing had happened, and she didn’t even know why she had been crying. She had just found herself unable to stop. So he had sat down next to her and had just held her while she had cried for no reason in particular.

“Do you want me to read you a story?” Oliver asked quietly.

Felicity nodded again, and Oliver smiled softly. Drunk Felicity was like a baby, needed to be held and rocked into sleep. And so was sick Felicity obviously.

Oliver didn’t have to ask to know she always kept her book in the drawer of her nightstand. To his surprise the only thing he found was a magazine. Felicity probably hadn’t had much time to read lately. The magazine would surely fulfill the same use he decided before opening it and freezing.

“Felicity, I have no idea what half of the words mean, not to mention how they need to be pronounced,” Oliver explained, skimming over the first lines of the text about some extraordinary technology.

For the first time since she had fallen sick three days ago he could feel her smile against his skin. Wordlessly she snuck a hand under the fabric of his hoody and rested her hand on his heart before mumbling, “You are so hot.”

“And I thought you had realized that before we got married,” he chuckled, only earning him a groan from Felicity. “Actually I thought you were marrying me because I am hot.”

“I’m sick. You’re not allowed to tease me.”

“Oh, poor baby…” Oliver said, still chuckling. “You want to take advantage of my hot body, snuggling to my hot, naked skin and enjoying the way it feels against yours?”

“’l’ver?” she mumbled against his neck.

“Hm?”

“Shut up!” she groaned although he felt her smiling and her hands already worked to open the zipper of his hoody.

Oliver bit his tongue and let Felicity huddle against his naked chest. Her shirt was slightly damp from her sweat, and her toes were so cold he really needed to force himself to not pull his legs away to avoid the coldness on his calves.

“’my?” Felicity rasped, coughing so her whole body was moving about him.

“She’s with Thea,” Oliver answered, not stopping to rub her back with one hand while he readjusted the blanket above them, so Felicity was wrapped up with warmth. She had started to shake again. “Do you want some tea?”

Felicity shook her head.

“Something to eat?”

Again she shook her head, and Oliver sighed. She hadn’t eaten anything the whole day.

“How about a bubble bath?”

“L’ter.”

“Okay,” he whispered, pressing his lips against her forehead again and smiled when she said something against his neck that he couldn’t understand acoustically, but nonetheless understood with his heart. “I love you, too, Felicity.”


	36. Nightly guest

Oliver woke up abruptly, staring at the ceiling of his dark bedroom. He was aware of everything around him immediately. He felt the comforting weight of Felicity’s head on his outstretched arm and the slight tickling of her hair on his skin. He could even feel her even breaths and see the upper part of her body rise and fall with every breath from the corner of his eyes.

His heartbeat wasn’t fasten which meant that he hadn’t woken from a nightmare. For a short moment he listened into the dark night, trying to find out what had woken him.

When he couldn’t hear anything, he sighed quietly and decided that it must have been a low snort from Felicity. She was still recovering from an infection and was snorting sometimes. It was one of the sweetest sounds in the world, only outstripped by the giggle of his nine month old daughter.

Smiling, Oliver turned to his side and snuggled to Felicity’s back, resting his head in the crook of her neck and breathing her in while simultanously pulling her closer to himself.

For two long heartbeats he thought about letting his hand sink under the fabric of his shirt that covered her sleeping form. He could kiss her and rub his length to her fabulous ass.

But she was sleeping too peacefully for him to disturb her. So Oliver just tightened his hold on her and sighed contentedly.

“Oliver?” she mumbled in her sleep and he kissed the spot right behind her ear to reassure her that he was there. He had learned very early in their relationship that if he didn’t reassure her after thar she was going to wake up in fear someone could have broken into her home and was planning on hurting her. He had understood why when she had told him about her stalker, a creepy guy who had actually made his way back to her last year, trying to-

He was pulled out of his bitter memories when he heard a noise downstairs.

 

At first Felicity was pulled out of sleep slowly, but as soon as she realized that someone had put his hand on her mouth she tensed and instinctively tried to fight whoever did this.

“Hey, calm down. It’s me,” Oliver whispered to her ear, pulling her closer to his body before turning her so she was lying on her back with him hovering above her.

His right hand was still lying over her lips. He had put one finger of his left hand to his own lips, asking her to be quiet. Felicity looked up at him confused.

She was used to be woken up in the middle of the night to participate in some sexy time. This felt different from those times.

“Someone is downstais,” he whispered, not taking his hand from her mouth. “We will leave our bedroom now. I will take you to the nursery, and you will stay with Emmeline, locked into her room, while I go downstairs and check what’s going on. Do you understand?”

He waited for her to nodd before he slowly moved his hand from  her lips, getting up from the bed and taking her hand while sneaking to the door. Felicity followed him as quietly as she could, watching as he opened the door to the corridor, throwing a glance before moving out and pulling her behind himself.

While they crept down the corridor to the nursery where Emmeline hopefully slept quietly, Felicity walked between Oliver’s tense body and the wall. Felicity was very aware of the fact that her husband was in full Arrow-mode.

When they reached the door to their baby’s bedroom Oliver opened it for her and let her in.

“Lock the door,” he demanded in a whisper and was already closing the door when Felicity put one hand above one of his and looked up at him intensely.

She couldn’t express the fear she had that something could happen to him. He wasn’t in his Arrow-gear. He wasn’t armed the way he was when he was out in the streets, protecting the city. Whatever threat had come to their home could take him away from her. At least if that bad lot downstairs happened to be anything but a common thief.

In that case she might as well feel sorry for him because he had surely picked the wrong place to break into.

“I’ll come back,” he whispered, lifting her chin with his fingers and stroking her bottom lip with his thumb.

“Promise?” she answered, as well whispering.

Oliver nodded, lowering his head to brush her lips with his shortly. He looked at Felicity one last time, reminding her to lock the door and she nodded, doing like he said while silently praying that she wasn’t going to lose him.

At least Emmeline seemed to still sleep deeply, unaware of what was happening around her.

 

Oliver waited until he heard the clicking of the door lock before sneaking towards the stairs, trying to figure out where the intruder was. He could see him, but the view from upstairs wasn’t that good so he couldn’t see anything.

Quietly he moved down, trying to hide in the shadows as far as possible.

Every normal father would probably just call the police if someone broke into their home, thinking it was a thief. But Oliver’s life wasn’t as easy as that and he knew that. Whoever broke in could as well be an enemy from his past, dangerous and out for blood. 

For the first time in a long time Oliver started praying to a God he wasn’t sure he fully believed in. He knew that he was vulnerable, especially when he was without back-up and not even in his Arrow-gear. All he could do was pray that whoever had the nerves to barge into his home wasn’t a skilled fighter or assassin or whatever. He could only pray for a common thief.

The thought of facing someone he wasn’t able to handle on his own while his family was upstairs made his heart tighten. Only the thought of never seeing Felicity and Emmeline again was unbearable. But even worse was the thought of having to leave them, of knowing that Felicity will never see him again. He gulped and pushed the thought aside. He needed all his focus.

He heard noises from the kitchen and creeped to the door, planning on surprising the intruder and attacking him. But just when he was in front of it the door opened and Oliver instinctively moved, throwing him against the wall and trapping him between the wall and his forearm that was pressed against the intruder’s throat.

It took him a moment to recognize who he was and his eyes went wide.

“You?”

 

Felicity paced back and forth, still praying for Oliver to come back unharmed. 

She knew she couldn’t live without him. Not anymore.

Sure, she would go on and do everything to raise Emmeline, but she wouldn’t live if he-

Felicity felt tears prickling in her eyes and pushed the thought aside. She wasn’t going to allow herself to imagine this. She wasn’t going to think about this.

Oliver was a skilled fighter, a wonderful husband and an amazing father with heart and soul. He wouldn’t let anyone destroy what they had, especially not by letting himself be killed.

With shaking fingers Felicity rubbed Emmeline’s tummy, trying to comfort herself by looking at her quietly sleeping baby.

When she heard steps in the corridor she straightened up, focussing on the door and listening with held breath as the sound of the steps fell silent right in front of the door.

Please let it be Oliver, she whispered without a sound escaping her lips.

“Felicity?”

It didn’t take her more than a second to run to the door, open it and throw herself in Oliver’s arms, peppering his face with little kisses of relief.

“Thank God, you’re okay,” she whispered inbetween kisses to not wake Emmeline up. “I was so scared. What happened? Who was it?”

Oliver picked her up from the floor, closing the door to the nursery before carrying his wife downstairs, explaining with low voice, “It’s Roy. He got into a fight with Thea and needed a place to sleep.”

“So he just broke in?” Felicity asked back.

“Sorry, Felicity,” Roy said as soon as they were downstairs, and Oliver let Felicity back to the floor. “I just… I didn’t want to use the bell because I didn’t want Emmy to wake up, and I thought since I broke into a lot of places before-”

“Yeah, how did you manage to do that?” Felicity interrupted, cocking her head. “I mean… You must have been loud enough to wake Oliver up, so you must have been pretty loud.”

“I actually think Oliver has super-senses,” Roy mumbled, massaging the back of his neck. “Maybe I should go. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

He was already on the way to the door when Felicity took his hand and pulled him back, already dragging him upstairs.

“Don’t be ridiculous,“ she laughed lowly so Emmeline wasn’t going to wake up. “We have an empty guestroom you can use. Of course you can use it.”

“Are you okay with that?” Roy asked Oliver, looking back over his shoulder to his friend who had been quietly following them.

Oliver didn’t get around to answer since Felicity just said, “As if he had anything to say in this house.”

It actually made all three of them chuckle. Although they were mostly equal, she wore the breeches in this marriage. Who was going to argue with that?


	37. Sweet Revenge

Felicity had been spending weeks - months to be honest - thinking about how she could pay Oliver back for capturing her in the trunk of a car when he had actually promised to train her for the first time since she had found out that she was pregnant and had had a baby. Nineteen months had passed since then and Felicity had felt the need for a resumption of her training.

Obviously Oliver had thought otherwise.

So Felicity had felt the need for revenge since that second he had lifted her up and carried her out of the lair and put her in the trunk of the damn car he had borrowed just to do that to her. And she hadn’t even allowed to think for too long that he had taken a photo and sent it to her mom, John, Laurel, Thea and Barry. God, she had felt so humiliated!

Even after almost three months she still did.

In short: Oliver needed to be paid back for that.

From the first second in that trunk Felicity had thought about how to get to Oliver, how to really take revenge on him.

That just left her with one single problem: How did you surprise a man who was a skilled fighter and thereby nearly unable to surprise.

Every common prank she knew wasn’t going to work.

So Felicity had done researches.

She had asked her friends which had been very… let’s just say they hadn’t really been able to help her.  
Diggle and Roy had just told her that they weren’t going to engage in this.  
Laurel had been willing to help, but really hadn’t had any good idea.  
Same with Thea and she had screeched so loudly Felicity had been scared Oliver had been going to hear everything.

On Christmas Caitlin had suggested that maybe Felicity should use Oliver’s weakness to get revenge. This had led to Iris’ idea of tying Oliver to the bed and take a photo of that.  
Unfortunately Felicity had enough girls on Oliver to not really need to send photos of her half-naked husband to other ladies to feel busy with occasional jealousy.

At the same time Felicity had been busy with Oliver’s insecurities about their daughter’s “dadda” babbling which had led him to a serious crisis. She hadn’t been able to pay him back for a while. She wanted revenge and not to totally destory him. It had taken until after New Year‘s Day and after her illness to get back to her plans.

Since her friends had been unable to help, Felicity had hoped for a better answer from the world wide web, but even the wonderful internet hadn’t been able to teach her anything helpful - at least at first.

Lucky her she-

“What are you thinking about?” Oliver asked, kissing her lightly.

“Nothing,” Felicity answered a little too fast, and Oliver raised his eyebrows. Hastily she got up from the couch. When she put her hands on his shoulders, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer, still the asking expression in his eyes. “I was just wondering if it was a good idea to do this party right now. You know, Thea and Roy still haven’t fully made up, and now they are supposed to be here with everyone around and-”

“Felicity, this was your idea,” Oliver reminded her softly and she nodded. Just when he leaned down to kiss her the bell rang, and he pulled back with a low groan. “Worst timing ever.”

Felicity watched him leave to open the door, leaning down to lift Emmeline from the floor where she had been crawling.

“We are going to have some fun today,” Felicity whispered to her ear, kissing her baby’s temple and pressing her close to her body.

The first step on her plan to revenge had been to get all of their friends and family together to a little Arrow-Flash-Smoak-Queen-Family-Friends-afternoon. So those next thirty minutes Felicity watched pleased as everyone she had invited entered.

The first ones were their friends from Central City - Barry and Iris, Caitlin and Ronnie and of course Cisco. They were followed by Laurel who was immediately pulled aside by Cisco to discuss a few more technology ideas for the Black Canary. Thea and Roy showed up ten minutes later. The Diggles came a little after that and finally Quentin Lance arrived with Donna who had planned on visiting her almost-boyfriend for the weekend anyway.

Unfortunately the second step was something she really didn’t enjoy - waiting.  
She wanted to act. To take her revenge right now.  
But she knew she couldn’t. Not yet.

So Felicity did her best to chat with her guests, not letting them note her nervousness which really wasn’t easy because even the thought of how Oliver was going to look like amused her so much she needed to constantly bite her tongue to not start laughing. At the same time she was so worried something could go wrong that she had started to play with her engagement ring and wedding band.

Of course her behavior didn’t stay unnoticed for long. Soon she felt two strong arms wrap around her waist, bringing her back in touch to a familiar broad chest.  
She sighed when a pair of lips brushed against her neck.

“Don’t worry. Everything is fine,” Oliver whispered. “Roy and Thea seem to be okay, and everyone is enjoying the day. Including me. So thank you.”

Sighing again, Felicity turned around and pressed her lips to his, sliding her arms around his neck and looking up at him happily.

“This really is a nice afternoon, isn’t it?” she asked and Oliver nodded, turning his head when he heard Emmeline giggle loudly about something Barry had just done while wiggling in Iris’ arms.

“How would you feel about cutting the cake?” he asked her with a kiss to the tip of her nose.

“I think now is the perfect time,” Felicity nodded. “I actually think I should give you the honor of doing it since you’ve been such a great husband… last night.”

“I can hear that!” Roy shouted from the other side of the room, glaring at them. “And I don’t want to hear any of that!”

Oliver chuckled, brushing a kiss on Felicity’s lips and went over to the fridge to get the cake Felicity had baked with the help of a neighbor.

She felt her heart beat faster and reminded herself to take deep breaths.  
The time had come.

“Hey, before I cut the cake,” Oliver said loudly into the room, getting everyone’s attention which was even better than Felicity had pictured, “I want to thank all of you for coming here. I am so grateful to share this day with all of you, to have my friends and family here.”

“We should do this more often,” Barry suggested.

“We should,” everyone agreed.

Felicity watched with held breath as Oliver took the knife to cut the cake. He lowered the tip of the knife to the cake, placing it the way he wanted to make the perfect first cut and - boom!

The loud noise made everyone flinch. At least everyone but Felicity who had known this was going to happen.

“What was that?” Lyla asked, rubbing Sara’s back since the little girl looked like she was about to cry.

“I don’t know,” Oliver answered, bending forward to take a look at the cake and poked in the cake with the tip of the knife until he could see the pink fabric under it. “Is that a-”

He didn’t get to finish the question since suddenly the plate the cake had been put on was mechanically lifted and thrown right into Oliver’s pretty face, covering it almost completely.

For a moment nobody dared to say a word. Everyone was quietly watching as Oliver tried to understand what had just happened. And then everyone started laughing, Felicity included, while Oliver watched them carefully.

“What the hell?” Oliver asked confused.

“I guess someone needed to pay you back for something,” Felicity answered with an innocent smile and shrugged her shoulders. “Just my guess.”

Oliver looked at her for what felt like an eternity, not twitching a bit.

“Wait till I get you,” he growled and alal of a sudden moved into her direction.

With a high-pitched screech Felicity jumped towards Diggle, hiding behind his broad figure and using him as a living shield.

“Come on, guys, don’t get me into this,” John laughed while holding up his hands.

When Oliver finally made his move to get to her, Felicity reacted fast enough to shove John into him and ran to the stairs. She didn’t need to look back to know Oliver was following her.

She hadn’t reached the door to their bedroom when he catched up with her. He turned her around, lifted her from the floor and moved his face against hers, spreading the cake from his face on hers, too, while Felicity screeched, giggled and moved wildly to get away from him.

It didn’t last long, though. Soon they were kissing passionatly, all teeth and tongue. Felicity wrapped her legs around Oliver’s waist and Oliver pulled her even closer to his body.

Even when their lips parted to let both of them get some desperately needed oxygen, their foreheads stayed in touch.

“I love you,” Oliver said breathlessly.

“Despite of the cake in your face?”

“Makes me love you even more actually,” Oliver chuckled.

“I love you, too,” Felicity said softly, kissing him once again, but rather shortly and sweetly than the last time.

When they pulled apart again, Oliver sighed and looked down at her. 

“You want to be trained again?” he asked with another sigh and Felicity nodded, making him once again sigh. “I’ll train you.”

“Really?” Felicity asked with wide eyes. “That was all it took? Just throwing a cake into your face? I mean… You know, when I planned my revenge I had no idea what to do because I really thought I couldn’t surprise you with anything. So then I found that cake prank and thought to myself ‘That is nice, but it’s just not enough to have that little drops of cake on you’ so I decided to use that moment to do the more common cake in the face prank. If I had known that I’d get whatever I want from this, I surely would have-”

Oliver interrupted her by kissing her once again before smiling and saying, “Don’t force your luck here, Mrs. Queen. I might change my mind about training.”

“No, you won’t,” Felicity smiled, brushing her lips over his once more.

Just when Oliver planned on deepening the kiss, they heard John call from downstairs, “Guys, if you are having sex up there while we are all down here, I swear to God this will be the last time we ever did something like this!”

“Don’t worry! We will just clean up and be downstairs,” Oliver shouted back, putting Felicity back to the floor. “You can take care of what’s left of the cake if you dare.”

“The cake is in your face, bro!”

“There’s another cake in the little fridge in the basement,” Felicity shouted.

“Is it another prank cake?” Diggle asked.

“It’s not. I promise.”

Oliver looked down at her. “You baked a second cake?”

“Sure. Although I rather let it back since I cannot bake. Anyway I wanted cake and since we aren’t allowed to have sex with everyone downstairs, I can’t really do this” - she leaned forward to lick cake from his cheek - “with all the cake on you… So a second cake seemed to be a good idea.”

Giggling, she went to the bathroom while Oliver watched her, quietly thanking whoever or whatever was responsible for giving him the honor of being married to this woman.


	38. One year from now

Oliver glanced at his watch one more time. He grabbed his briefcase hastily, hurrying out of the bedroom. He had an appointment at QC in ten minutes. The drive would cost him at least fifteen, crossing the main floor where Felicity and Emmeline were at least another ten minutes, depending on how willing he was to leave them for the day.

He could hear Emmeline babble to her mother on his way downstairs. His eleven month old sunshine – how the hell was it possible that they celebrated her first birthday in only ten days?! – was a lot like her mother. She almost always smiled or giggled, infecting everyone around her with it. And she liked to talk. A lot.

“Morning, princess,” Oliver greeted his daughter, pressing a kiss to her hair and stroking her cheek, but Emmeline slapped his hand away, unwilling to be disturbed while drinking her morning bottle of milk.

Sighing, he went over to where Felicity stood at the counter, preparing their daughter’s breakfast while wearing nothing but one of his shirts.

“You’re late,” she reminded him when he leaned forward, pressing his head to her neck and kissing the hickey he had left there not even an hour ago. “I told you that you were going to be late if you continued.”

“We didn’t continue since someone interrupted,” Oliver responded, glancing at Emmeline who giggled like she had understood what she was accused of.

“You’re still late,” Felicity smiled, turning her head to kiss Oliver on his lips. “I’ll adjust your tie, and then you will leave.”

Oliver sighed in surrender. Wifey had spoken, and there was no way for him to object - at least not if he wanted to have sex tonight. And God he wanted to have sex as soon as possible.

We watched her closely as she adjusted his tie, carefully smoothing the invisible creases on his shirt before straightening on her tiptoes to kiss him softly.

“I love you,” she sighed when she pulled away.

“I love you, too,” he answered, lowering his head to kiss her once more. “I have one hour free for lunch. Care to join me?”

“Oh, I would, but I can’t. I have an appointment during lunch time.”

Oliver groaned, kissing her one last time before pulling away and taking his briefcase.

“Does daddy get a goodbye kiss?” he asked Emmeline, lowering his face to her level.

Emmeline looked at him with wide eyes like she really considered his question. Just when Oliver was about to beg her for a kiss, she leaned forward and kissed him.

“Thank you,” he whispered, but Emmeline was busy with her bottle once again. Oliver just shook his head, looking at Felicity. “What is that appointment you’re so busy with that you can’t even make time for lunch with your husband?”

“You’re late,” Felicity almost sang.

Oliver laughed, moving towards the door, but stopped in the middle of the room to turn back and watch Felicity, who was no busy with feeding Emmeline. The baby constantly tried to grab the spoon herself, but after the disaster she had produced last week Felicity wasn’t going to give her what she wanted.

“Felicity, what is that appointment?” he asked her, putting his briefcase to the floor and returning to the kitchen.

She hadn’t answered his question, something that was very untypical for his wife. He watched her closely as she bit her bottom lip before handing Emmeline the spoon and getting up to stand right in front of him.

“Okay, I don’t want you to freak out,” she started.

Oliver felt his heartbeat fastening. Trying not to freak out when someone tells you not to was not easy because if you were told not to freak out then there had to be a reason you could freak out. He was really spending too much time listening to his wife’s babble, he thought quietly.

“Just tell me,” he pleaded with her, taking her hands to put them on his heart to reassure her.

“I’m late.”

Oliver frowned, keeping her hands where they were put on his chest and looked at her with a worried and slightly confused expression in his face.

“I thought your appointment is at lunch time.”

He could see Felicity biting her tongue in amusement before breathing a laugh and stroking his chest with a small movement of her thumbs.

“No, Oliver, I mean… I’m late.”

It took him ten seconds before the meaning of her words actually sank in, and he could feel the smile starting to spread on his face.

“No!” Felicity warned before that could happen. “No, you are not allowed to freak out about this. You will only be disappointed if it doesn’t happen and then you go into broody-mode for a month and you will ruin Emmy’s birthday and I am not going to let his happen. This is why I didn’t tell you. Oliver, you will not think about this for the entire day, and you will not be all sad and broody when it’s just a false alarm. Promise me.”

“Am I allowed to be a little disappointed?”

“A little,” she answered, holding up her thumb and forefinger, demonstrating the measure of disappointment she allowed. It wasn’t even enough to put a piece of paper between them.

“Will you call me when you know the result?”

“No,” she answered simply.

“Really?”

“Really.” Sighing, he leaned forward to kiss her, but Felicity pushed him away.

“You. Go. Work. Now.”

“One word sentences?”

“I just wanted to make sure you understand them,” Felicity teased, and he answered with a laugh while leaving to go to work.

 

Oliver had no idea how he had made it through the day. He remembered leaving his home and now he was opening the door to his family’s house again. If anyone was going to ask him what he had done all day, he would have to lie.

Everything he could remember was thinking about the possible baby growing in Felicity’s belly right now.

Was it a girl or a boy?  
Was he/she going to take more after Felicity like Emmeline had or were they expecting a miniature version of Oliver?  
What name were they going to give him/her?  
How was Emmeline going to react? How were they going to tell her?  
Where would they arrange the nursery?

He had like a thousand questions he had been thinking about all day.  
Every single one of them revolved around that baby.

When he entered the dark house, leaving the briefcase right beside the door, he felt the need to shout for Felicity, finding out where she was as soon as possible. But he knew that Emmeline was asleep already, and he didn’t want to wake her. So he went towards the stairs hastily, intending to go upstairs where he was sure to find Felicity in their bed, reading in some IT journal.

Instead he found her sitting on the couch, a glass of red wine in her right hand while staring at the wall blankly.

Had to mean that she wasn’t pregnant, Oliver thought, but before any sadness about the false alarm could settle in, he saw the tears in her eyes and worries overtook him.

“Felicity?” he asked quietly, taking of his jacket and sitting down next to her. “Hey, baby, what’s wrong? What happened?”

Felicity kept staring at the wall for two more seconds before taking a sip from her wine and shaking her head.

“Nothing,” she said. “Nothing. I’m just tired. I’ll go to bed. See you to-“  
When she intended to stand up and leave, Oliver put his arms around her waist and pulled her back towards him until she was sitting in his lap, her forehead resting against his and her hands being placed on his shoulders.

“Are you sad?” he asked quietly.

Felicity nodded, closing her eyes and sliding her arms around his neck and nuzzling his nose with hers.

“I thought you wanted to wait a little longer,” he whispered, moving his hands up and down her sides.

“I wanted to,” she sighed, a little sob escaping her. “But… I don’t know… When I thought I was pregnant, I was just so… happy although I still think that Emmeline should be a little older before we have another baby. Rationally I know that, but…”

Oliver lifted his hand, wiping away a tear that had escaped the corner of her eye. He kissed her softly, breathing her in.

“Give me your phone please,” he asked and she did.

Oliver typed a few things in before handing it back to her. Felicity looked down at him confusedly.

“What did you do?” she asked.

“Open your calendar” he asked, moving his lips to the hickey on her neck.

“Okay,” she half moaned when Oliver sucked the skin.

“Now look at your appointments today in one year,” he murmured against her skin. “And read your appointments for that day out loud please.”

He could tell from the way her body moved against his, pressing closer to his own body, when she read what appointment he had booked in her calendar.

“Read it out loud, Felicity.”

“Make a baby with Oliver,” she read with a giggle, pulling at his hair, so he she could look into his eyes. “You really had to add the last part?”

“Didn’t want to let any questions unanswered about this,” he smiled.

For the first time this evening Felicity smiled back at him. “Thank you. Best husband ever.”

“Only for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please also check out these gif sets about the chapter. Kasey (@myshipperlife) did this. All credit to her:  
> [part 1](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/140927783140/myshipperlife-possible-pregnancy-gifset-%C2%BD)  
> [part 2](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/141145546495/myshipperlife-possible-pregnancy-gifset-22)


	39. Happy Family Time

Felicity stood still in the middle of the stairs, watching as Oliver sat on the couch and talked to their little daughter who was sitting in his lap, looking at him with wide eyes.

“How is it even possible you are already one year old? You are not supposed to grow up this fast. In the blink of an eye I will have to chase away the boys you are going to attract with your cuteness. Just like your mommy. I always need to keep an eye on the guys that are around her and try to take her away from me.”

“Yeah, like that’s ever going to happen,” Felicity smiled, coming downstairs and sliding her arms around Oliver’s shoulders from behind, resting her chin on his right shoulder and snuggling her cheek to his.

“You can never be too careful,” he answered with a smile, moving his cheek against hers, so his stubble scratched her skin, probably leaving red marks.

“What time is it?”

“They will be here any minute,” Felicity sighed, knowing exactly what Oliver’s question actually meant.

“Why exactly couldn’t we just spend a day like this? Just the three of us huddled together on the couch?”

“Because it is Emmy’s first birthday, and your lovely sister had planned the whole party before we even realized it,” Felicity laughed quietly, kissing Oliver’s cheek, and walked back to one of the cupboards next to the wall. “Speaking of party, Thea insisted on everyone wearing one of those party hats and since you’ve been busy being the Corporate Master of the Universe, I needed to pick a color for you and decided for-“

“Pink?” he asked disbelievingly as Felicity showed him the party hat, placing it on his head. “Really? You couldn’t have chosen a different color?”

“Nope,” Felicity answered popping the ‘p’ while Emmeline clapped her hands excitedly and moved in Oliver’s lap, trying to grab her father’s hat. “I think you look gorgeous.”

Oliver rolled his eyes at her, got up to his feet and cocked his head when he saw Felicity’s hat.

“Don’t you think we should swap them? I mean… green is more my color than yours.”

Just when he moved to take her hat from her, the bell rang and Felicity moved towards the door hastily, calling back over her shoulder: “Sorry, babe, but there is no time to swap hats. Our guests are already there.”

She heard Oliver mumbling something, but couldn’t understand the words, so she decided to just ignore it, smiling slightly. She had known his reaction to a pink hat which was exactly why she had chosen it. Teasing Oliver still was fun.

“Wow, did all of you meet outside in purpose?” Felicity asked as soon as she had opened the door and saw all of their friends and family members gathered in front of the door, wearing the same kind of party hats she and Oliver did.

“Of course,” Thea, who clearly was the leader of the group of people, answered with a roll of her eyes that reminded Felicity a lot of Oliver. “We wanted to have the perfect start to the party which means we will all go in there together, singing ‘Happy Birthday’ for my little niece.”

“I’m still not convinced about the singing part,” Roy explained doubtingly, earning him an angry glare from his girlfriend.

“Barry’s a great singer!” Caitlin shouted from somewhere. “Maybe we should let him sing! Emmy will be happy about it, I assume.”

“Yeah, let’s just leave the singing to the people who actually can sing,” John agreed with a nod.

Quiet mumblings were heard as everyone tried to talk Thea out of building a chorus to sing to the little birthday girl, but of course she wasn’t really listening to it.

“No!” she insisted instead, silencing the murmuring in an instance. “We will all sing just like I had planned it out. This is Emmeline’s birthday which is why we will all sing to her. Now!”

It was obvious that Thea didn’t allow any protest which was why all Felicity did was stepping aside, opening the door further for all of them to come in.

She watched smiling as Thea stepped inside, followed by Roy and Laurel, the Diggle family with Baby Sara walking proudly between her parents, Cisco, Caitlin and Ronnie, Barry and Iris.

To Felicity’s own surprise Thea seemed to have invited some special guests she hadn’t told her about. So Ray walked in, winking at her with a smile and Captain Lance stepped in last.

“Your mom wanted to come, too, but she couldn’t swap shifts,” he whispered to her, keeping an eye on Thea, making sure that she wasn’t aware of his refusal to join the singers. “I promised to take at least a million photos and show her all of them when I visit her next weekend.”

“So the two of you are still good?” Felicity asked with a smile, only answered by a wink of Captain Lance.

As the chorus fell silent and everyone clapped their hands to celebrate little Emmeline who was wiggling in her aunt’s arms, happily smiling at everyone while still holding Oliver’s index finger in her little fist to reassure herself that her daddy wasn’t going anywhere, Felicity and Captain Lance joined the rest of them.

Felicity loved to have all her loved ones around and even if Oliver didn’t admit it, the expression in his face made clear that he enjoyed having all those people here as well.

There were just so little numbers of occasions that allowed all of them to come together.

Protecting Starling City and Central City kept all of them busy most of the time which made it almost impossible to meet on a regular basis.

Of course there were the occasional meetings when their nighttime works made cooperation necessary, but they barely had any time to actually be just them then.

Spending a day together like this barely ever happened.  
Much to everyone’s disappointment.

Moments like these were precious and they reminded them of why they did what they did.

“’lic’ty?” Baby Sara who was actually a toddler by now but was always going to stay Baby Sara in Felicity’s thoughts asked, pulling at the hem of Felicity’s dress to attract her attention.

Smiling, Felicity bent down and lifted Sara from the floor. “What’s up, sweetheart?”

“I want cake!”

Felicity laughed, smiling at Oliver whose eyes had snapped towards her as soon as he had heard her laugh. It still made her heart skip a beat, knowing how aware he was of her every move.

“Maybe you ask Uncle Oliver for cake. He is always the one cutting the cake. I’m sure he will be honored to give you the first piece.”

Immediately Baby Sara wiggled out of Felicity’s arms, running towards Oliver and literally jumping up at him. She was lucky Oliver was fast and strong enough to catch and hold her with one arm since Emmeline refused to let go of his finger.

“Oliver, I want cake!” she shouted excitedly.

Felicity watched as Oliver smiled at his friends' daughter, talking to her happily and taking her to the kitchen as soon as Emmeline’s hand let go of his finger and wrapped around a strand of Ray’s hair instead, obviously fascinated about something.

She could stare at Oliver holding Sara for an eternity. Seeing the two of them together had always given her a clear picture of what was ahead for their future. Oliver loved Sara as much as a second daughter. He had actually tried out how to handle kids by babysitting her which was why he had become such a great father.

For a short second she felt the slight disappointment she had felt two weeks ago when her assumption of being pregnant again had turned out to be wrong, but as soon as the feeling had come, it was gone again. She had Oliver and she had Emmeline and all the people she loved and all of that was enough for her. Everything else could wait right now.

“Hey, you okay?” John asked, putting a hand to her shoulder.

“Yes, everything is fine,” Felicity answered, smiling at him convincingly. “I just realized how much I missed having all of you around.”

“Yeah, it’s nice spending some time like normal people do,” he agreed with a nod. “Sara was so excited she had thought about what to wear for the last days. She said she wanted to look pretty for her Uncle Oliver.”

“Is Sara still as addicted to Oliver then?” she asked with a smile.

Both of them watched as Sara let Oliver feed her the cake, talking to him in what seemed to be a very serious conversation.

“Well, sometimes I still feel like I need to fight for the first place on her heart,” John chuckled, shaking his head. “She’s talking a lot about her uncle.”

“Don’t worry,” Felicity answered, placing one hand on his bicep. “Emmeline is talking about you, too, at least as much as she is actually talking. ‘John’ seems to be her favorite word nowadays.”

“That seems to be fair,” he nodded. “I’ll go save myself a piece of cake before Sara eats all of it by herself. She doesn’t look like it, but she can eat more than me.”

It didn’t take long for everyone else to go get some cake, too. They all sat down in the living room, building little groups, carrying on different conversations.

Laurel, Iris and Lyla were talking about some girly stuff.  
Captain Lance, John, Ronnie and Roy were discussing some developments in Starling City’s crime.  
Ray, Cisco and Caitlin had gone into a huddle, whispering about some possible technological inventions.  
Meanwhile Barry, Thea, Oliver and Sara were trying to get Emmeline to open all the presents she had been given. Thea alone must have given her at least twenty.

“No, Emmy,” Sara explained. “You need to rip it open. Like this!”

Baby Sara made a start, ripping away part of the paper, leaving it for Emmeline to continue, but instead the little girl grabbed a fistful of the pink paper, putting it into her mouth to eat it.

“No, don’t eat that,” Barry laughed, taking the paper out of her hands.

Emmeline looked at him for a second. Felicity could tell from the expression in her eyes that her daughter was seriously considering crying. Instead she grabbed another fistful of the paper, trying to eat it again.

“Oh, she is just as stubborn as her dad,” Felicity waved off when Barry tried to take the paper away from her again. “She always wants to learn the hard way.”

Oliver shot her a glance, grinning at her widely before mouthing a quiet “I love you” to which she responded just as quietly, “I love you, too.”

“How about you try some cake instead, sweety?” Barrie tried, offering Emmeline a piece of cake. Barry and Emmeline - one more thing Felicity could never get enought of.

In fact Emmeline let go of the paper, instead forming a fist around the cake, trying to get the cake into her mouth. When it didn’t work she just leaned forward, biting into the cake without touching it with her hands, so there was actually more cake all around her mouth than there was probably in it, but Emmeline giggled nonetheless.

“Well, those eating habits are definitely from you,” Oliver grinned at his wife with a wink. “Reminds me of how you look when there is mint chocolate chip ice cream.”


	40. The false Oliver Queen

“It feels like we haven’t been together on a party for years,” Thea sighed, sipping at her cocktail while moving her hips in rhythm to the loud music.

“Well, last week there was Emmy’s first birthday party,” Laurel reminded. “Speaking of, how did you get your caveman of a husband to actually agree to let her stay with a babysitter? Last time I checked he still had issues letting me watch her for a few hours.”

“You know, that really isn’t anything personal. He barely lets anyone watch her which is why I didn’t get him to agree on anything,” Felicity answered. “He said he wasn’t going to leave his only daughter with some random human being who neither knows how to care for a unique baby like Emmeline nor knows how to protect her in case of danger.”

“So where is she tonight?” Lyla asked, shooting a gaze towards the bar where Oliver, John and Roy chatted about something, all of them looking flawless. “And please don’t tell me you’ve brought her here, and she is down in the lair now.”

Felicity laughed. “No, although I could swear the idea has popped up in Oliver’s mind. Instead he actually suggested asking Captain Lance to watch her for a few hours. Oliver isn’t going to stay here for too long since we agreed that we were going to pick her up before midnight and when I say ‘we’ we actually mean ‘he’ because I am going to spend the night here, getting drunk.”

Lyla and Thea giggled – you couldn’t describe it otherwise since they were enjoying their third drinks already and seemed to be a little tipsy – while Felicity sipped at her cocktail and Laurel looked at her friend frowning.

“He doesn’t let me watch her, but my dad who is known to not be his greatest fan and my dad actually does this because Ollie asked him to?” she asked, shaking her head with a smile. “It seems like your mother really has a great influence on their relationship.”

“Yeah, I think so. And speaking of my mother, she’s coming to Starling in a few weeks and asked for a family dinner. We should talk about a date as soon as possible.”

“Sure. I love your mom.”

“Everyone loves her mom,” Thea said, emptying her cocktail. “I need another one.”

“I’ll go get you one,” Felicity suggested reaching out for the empty glass to take it to the bar and get her sister-in-law a new one. “Anyone else?”

“I’m good,” Lyla answered, while Laurel just waved with her half-full glass.

Shrugging her shoulders, Felicity turned around and tried to battle herself through the crowd of dancing people towards the bar.

It had been a good idea to come here and just spend some more time together away from their night time job. And Felicity liked the idea to spend some time that she didn’t have to be a mother, at least not in the first place. She loved Emmeline, and she loved being a wife and a mother, and she wasn’t gonna give up on that for anything, but sometimes she just missed nights like this that she could just spend with her friends, celebrating and having fun like before she had become a mother.

Did that make her a bad person?

Felicity shook her head, chasing the thoughts away and automatically searched out the engagement ring and wedding band on her left finger, but all her fingertips made contact with was naked skin. With a groan she remembered that she had forgotten to put them back on after her shower.

Normally she didn’t take them off at all, but for some reason she had today.  
What reasons had that been?

Before she could answer that question she bumped into a broad chest and took a step backwards hastily, smiling up at the man she had bumped in apologizing.

“I’m really sorry,” she hurried to say. “I was kind of in my thought and didn’t see you. I hope I didn’t spill any remains of the cocktails on you.”

She eyed up the stranger’s dress shirt, trying to make out spots, but couldn’t find any in the darkness of Verdant.

“Oh, don’t worry. I might have run into you actually,” the stranger answered. “Let me buy you a new drink… or new _drinks_ in your case.”

“That’s nice, but totally unnecessary because-“

“No, I have to insist,” he interrupted her, putting a hand to her shoulder and smiling at her softly. “You know, this is actually my club, so…”

Felicity opened her mouth to tell him that this was impossible since both owners were actually part of her family, but instead cocked her head and shut her mouth again, eying up the stranger nosily.

He was tall and had a muscular body with a broad chest and strong arms. His dark blond hair was just a little bit longer than the stubble on his cheek. Even in the darkness she could see that his eyes were blue.  
For someone who wasn’t as close to Oliver as she was, the stranger might actually look alike to him.

“You are Oliver Queen?” she asked, and the stranger nodded with a grin. “I feel so honored to meet you!”

Felicity had to bite her tongue as she did her best to imitate one of those faked women that sometimes tried to flirt with Oliver, thinking with his good looks and his wealth and success and his former playboy attitude he had to be one of those rich guys to spend a few hours of fun with.

None of them had ever cared about the fact that Oliver was officially married and had a child.

“It really is my honor,” he answered, putting the hand that didn’t lie on her shoulder to his heart, almost making Felicity burst out in laughter. “What’s your name, beautiful?”

“Felicity!” Thea yelled, stopping next to her and sliding an arm around her shoulders. “Where is my drink? I’m parched!”

“Mia, you won’t believe who I just met,” Felicity said as enthusiastically as she could. Thea frowned, hearing her sister-in-law call her by the name she had used back when she had been in Corto Maltese, but Felicity just wanted to make sure this game was going to last for a little longer and if he had done at least a little research, Thea’s name might ring a bell. “He is Oliver Queen.”

An expression of realization crossed Thea’s face before she put on a bright smile that matched Felicity’s and turned towards the false Oliver Queen.

“Wow!” she giggles, waving herself some air like she needed to keep herself from blushing. “That is so… amazing! It’s like you are a dream and you are so hot!”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, taking deep breaths to not start laughing. Thea was so much better in this than she was. She even let her hands slide over his clothed chest, exaggeratingly admiring his muscles.

They kept playing their game for a while, admiring the great Oliver Queen and Felicity knew she had been right to not call Thea by her name when the faked Oliver explained to them that he and his sister were working on a project for the Queen Foundation and he was really excited to see how it was going to work out. He was trying to right the wrongs that his parents had caused with the Undertaking, trying to do some good with the money Queen Consolidated was bringing in.

Exactly that had been announced in a newspaper article last week. He must have done at least some research, Felicity concluded, although he kept noticeably silent about ‘his’ wife.

“So…” the faked Oliver said, rubbing his hands against each other. “What can I get you ladies to drink?”

Before they could answer Felicity felt a prickle in her neck, reporting Oliver’s presence to her.

She had already begun to wonder what took him so long. Knowing his jealousy, she would have bet that he would have hurried right to her side as soon as that guy had touched her.

“Hey, Jonas,” she said hastily, turning around and taking the hand he had already outstretched to tug her against him, holding it in between her hands to keep the show going. “You won’t believe who Mia and I just met. May I introduce to you to the famous Oliver Queen?”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment while Felicity smiled at him, the amusement in her eyes clear to see for everyone who knew her. She could almost see Oliver thinking his possibilities through. Felicity knew the jealous husband in him wanted to just make clear who she belonged to, but the part of him that knew Felicity’s amusement didn’t want to ruin this game and play along. So Oliver finally grinned back at her and turned towards the man who claimed to be him.

“Hey, I’m Jonas,” he said, shaking the man’s hand.

“Nice to meet you,” the faked Oliver answered. “Those two are your sisters, I guess?”

“I am,” Thea answered hastily. “But she’s not. She’s my friend.”

“So, Felicity,” the false Oliver said to her, smiling charmingly. “Do you have a boyfriend?”

Even from the corner of her eye Felicity could see Oliver clenching his jaw and forming his hands to fists at the sides of his body to keep his facial expression intact. Someone asking her that with him standing right beside her wasn’t really helping.  
She knew it wasn’t going to take long before the jealous side of him was going to prevail, and he was going to snap.

“No,” Felicity answered nonetheless with a bright smile. “Actually I am single and-“

“Don’t you have a wife?” Oliver interrupted her, his voice sounding strained. “I think I have read about you being married.”

The false Oliver didn’t do as much as blink. He just shot the real Oliver a short glance before smiling at Felicity again like she was the only one present here.

“You know, my wife and I got married really fast and it’s not really working. She was just after my money and a few days ago I found out she cheated on me and-“

“I’m sorry,” Oliver interrupted. “Please excuse me.”

He turned around, walking away. Felicity bit her tongue, keeping herself from looking after him and finding out where he was going. She balanced between to the bar to get drunk and downstairs to hit something.

“Is there a possibility your brother has a crush on our gorgeous friend here?” the faked Oliver asked Thea.

“Oh, my brother is…” Thea began, looking towards where Oliver had left. “He’s my brother.”

The faked Oliver smiled like he knew what that meant when really he had no idea. In Felicity’s opinion he was lucky she had decided to play this game with him because otherwise Oliver would have probably gone all Arrow at him and kick him out of Verdant in an instance. In case the faked Oliver had come as far as calling her a gold digger and cheater even then, Felicity was highly sure Oliver would have beaten the crap out of him.

“Yeah, well, how about those drinks?” the faked Oliver asked. “I think I should really-“

“Hey, everyone!” he was interrupted by a voice sounding from the loudspeakers while the music stopped and everyone present in the room turned towards the stage where Oliver stood with the microphone in his hand. “I hope you enjoy this night!”

Everyone was cheering like Oliver had just announced that there were free drinks for the rest of the night. Sometimes Felicity was still surprised by how easily he could switch back into the playboy attitude, but still it was somehow fun seeing him like this.

“Well, for everyone who doesn’t know,” he began, now looking towards them unashamedly, a slight grin on his face. “My name is Oliver Queen. I am the owner of this club.”

Felicity couldn’t hold back the grin that spread on her entire face as the faked Oliver Queen watched the real Oliver Queen with wide eyes and actual red color in his face. The proud posture he had been in all the time sank and he probably shrank an inch or so.

“Even more important than me,” Oliver continued meanwhile, still not breaking his glance from Felicity, “are those two women over there.”

A spotlight were aimed on them, almost blinding Felicity, so she had to hold up one hand to still see Oliver on the stage, the expression in his eyes now loving and tender. Still his eyes moved to Thea first.

“The first one is my sister Thea. We all need to thank her for managing this club because Verdant wouldn’t be what it is today without her. So thank you, Thea.”

Again the crowd cheered, but Felicity barely heard any of that. Her heart pounded in her chest, her pulse beating in her ear loudly made it impossible for her to hear anything but the rhythmic beat of her heart.

“And secondly I want to thank my beautiful wife for… everything I guess,” he continued, his gaze burning into her eyes, crawling under her skin and reaching spots deeply inside of her. “She is the love of my life, my soulmate and a lot of other things I don’t even know how to articulate. I love you, Felicity, and I will always support you, and I will never let anything or anyone come between us.”

There was a silence in that club that made Felicity take her eyes from her husband, searching out for their faked Oliver, just to find that he had already left, probably trying to avoid anymore embarrassment for the night.

“Anyway, let’s continue celebrating!” Oliver suggested before the silence could become anymore awkward, making the crowd cheer once more while he hurried to leave the stage, moving towards where Thea and Felicity were still standing.

As soon as he approached them, he pulled Felicity into his arms, kissing her passionately, his teeth burying into her bottom lip. Although she still held the empty glasses, she slid her arms around his neck and melted into him, letting him lick into her mouth and only pulled away when someone groaned disgustedly.

“Really, guys! Get a room!” Roy complained, sliding one arm around Thea’s waist.

Felicity blushed and tried to take a step back, but Oliver kept his hands firmly on her hips, pressing her body to his while looking at Roy with a bright grin. The younger man only rolled his eyes and knocked back his beer.

“Someone wants to explain us what that little speech was about?” Laurel asked, stepping towards them, Lyla and Diggle following her.

“I guess a certain someone tried to mark his territory,” John answered, giving Oliver a pat on the back.

“Oh, he’s already done that this morning,” Felicity answered without thinking, pulling the strap of her dress aside to show everyone the huge hickey Oliver had left there.

“Too much information!” Roy groaned.

Meanwhile Oliver just leaned forward to kiss the spot on her shoulder before putting the strap of her dress back in place. He then glanced at his watch.

“I should probably go now, pick up Emmeline and head straight to bed. You’re coming with me?”

“Oh, no!” Laurel answered for Felicity, tugging on her hand to pull her friend out of Oliver’s and into her own arms. “You can go and take care of your daughter. Felicity is going to stay here and have fun.”

Oliver opened his mouth, obviously trying to protest, but Felicity added hastily, “You’ve heard her, Oliver, and we have to do as she says since she’s taking Emmy for our wedding anniversary.”

Oliver frowned, looking at Thea in question.

It had been planned that Thea was going to take Emmeline for the night, but unfortunately one of her high school friends that had moved away was coming to Starling for a visit that day and Thea wanted to meet her, so Felicity had to find an alternative. Luckily, Laurel had offered to take Emmeline.

“Thea is busy, so I needed to find someone else,” Felicity explained. “Laurel offered to take care of Emmeline, and I agreed and before you try to argue that we should have talked about that, I can guarantee you that Laurel meets all criteria you insist on a babysitter.  
She is able to handle any possible intruder who could try to put our daughter in danger. Emmeline knows and loves her and the other way around, so we won’t have to worry whether Emmy will feel uncomfortable. And finally she knows how to handle babies. So the whole thing is set, you don’t have anything to say about it and now you gotta hurry to pick her up at Lance’s.”

Oliver shut his mouth, took in a deep breath and looked at Laurel then.

“Thank you for taking care of her,” Oliver said although his jaw was clenched and his voice sounded tight.

“Oh, it’s really my pleasure. It will be nice to not spend the night all by myself,” Laurel answered with a smile.

Oliver said goodbye to everyone, kissed Felicity shortly and headed for the exit while his friends and family watched him leave.

“Wow, two years of marriage and one year as daddy and he’s still as protective of you and Emmeline as before.”

“You think?” Thea asked, cocking her head. “I think it even got worse.”

“Yeah…” Felicity sighed, caught herself staring at Oliver’s ass and hastily shook her head to get back to her senses. “Whatever! I need a drink.”


	41. Can't fight biology

Oliver lay in bed, waiting impatiently for his wife to finally come home and join him.

Ever since he had started dating Felicity, sleeping alone had been an almost impossible thing to do. He missed the warmth of her body, her steady breathing and the low sounds she made while sleeping. Luckily, there hadn’t been much times that they had been forced to sleep separated.

The only real exceptions were the nights he had to spend on business trips. He was keeping them rare not just because sleep deprivation was an annoying thing, but also because often they didn’t really do the company any good. His need to be near his family was so immense that rather often than not he agreed to deals that he could have had negotiated in a better way if he hadn’t been in such a hurry to return home.

This was the first time he had to spend alone in the bed they usually shared. He had thought that maybe the smell of Felicity’s body on the pillows and the sheets were enough to lull him into sleep, but he had been wrong. Obviously.

It was ridiculous how much the sight of her empty bedside actually bothered him.

It wasn’t like Felicity was spending weeks away from him, sleeping in a separated bed while he had no idea what she was doing and whether she was safe or not.

No, Felicity was spending the night at Verdant with their friends and family. He had been there with her before he had left to pick up Emmeline from Captain Lance’s who had watched her for a few hours. Felicity had decided to spend more time partying with Laurel, Thea and Roy, Lyla and Diggle.

So he knew where she was. He knew what she was doing and he actually knew that she was safe. Still he couldn’t get rid of that tingling feeling that maybe something could be wrong.

Oliver shot a glance at his clock on the nightstand. It was almost four o’clock.  
A second glance to his cell told him that she hadn’t even sent a message. Of course she didn’t, he grumbled quietly, she was his wife and not his daughter. She could spend as much time partying as she wanted.

It had been fun spending a few hours there, but he seriously couldn’t remember how he had been able to actually enjoy spending every night in a club, hooking up with some random girl, telling her whatever lie had been necessary to get her in his bed. Although he had to say that most girls had been interested as soon as they had heard his name. Money had always seemed to attract the girls.

Immediately he had to think about that douche bag of a guy they had met in Verdant. He had actually had the nerves not just to pretend to be Oliver Queen and drag everything he had build with Felicity in the mud by calling her a gold digger and a cheater, no, he had actually tried to hit on Felicity, obviously not knowing that him being Oliver Queen would have made her his wife.

Oliver clenched his fists and took in a deep breath. Even thinking about anyone trying to hit on his wife or calling her a gold digger and cheater made him angry. If it had been up to him, he would have just beat that guy up and kick him out of his club, but Felicity had decided to play along with the game and so he had given her that amusement up to the point he had been unable to endure that guy any longer and had made clear who he was and who Felicity was.

Still the skin of his hands prickled with the need to hit something, that guy’s face for example.

Before Oliver could fully envision how he would have slammed his fist into that grinning face, knocking him out with one strong punch, he heard a door slamming shut downstairs, followed by steps on the stairs.

Hastily he turned around, pretending to be deeply asleep. He knew Felicity was probably going to notice that he was awake, but that couldn’t stop him from at least trying. He knew Felicity knew about his sleep issues, and she worried about that, but he didn’t want her to miss out on anything she wanted just because her husband was unable to sleep without her. He’d rather lie awake for another few nights than stopping her from having fun.

Oliver didn’t have to worry long, though, because the next second the door was pushed opened with so much force it actually slammed against the wall, making a noise that would have woken him up anyway. Even if he didn’t have super senses like Felicity often stated, he probably still would have woken up.

He opened his eyes, propping himself up onto his elbows he took in the sight of her, standing in the door to their bedroom. She didn’t make any attempt of moving to come in or anything. She just stood there, watching him. Questioning, he cocked his head.

“Felicity?”

With the bit of light that fell in through the window, he wasn’t able to see her face, so Oliver switched on the light on his nightstand before turning back to eye Felicity up closely.

Her hair was a bit messy, her cheeks glowed in a dark red color and her lipstick was smeared. She just stood there, smirking at him.

“Felicity, are you going to join me or will-“

“We,” she interrupted him, her speech slurring slightly, and pointed from herself to him and back to herself, “are going to have sex now.”

“We are?”

Giggling, she almost ran from where she had been standing at the door towards the bed, crawling on the mattress until she sat in his lap, straddling his thighs. He didn’t get to ask any further questions since she started peppering his face with little kisses while moving her hips against his, making him groan.

It would be easy for him to just let go of any questions he had and let her do as she pleased, but the good, loving husband in him reminded the horny part in himself that having sex with Felicity, while she was drunk and not exactly sane wasn’t behavior of a good husband. So with a barely audible sigh he put his hands to her hips and pushed her a little further away from his body.

Obviously Felicity didn’t really get the message because instead of stopping she grabbed the hem of her dress and started pulling it up over head. Her movements seemed a little imprecise and uncoordinated which caused the fabric of her dress to get stuck.

“I’m stuck!” Felicity stated with a screech, moving her hands in frustration. “I’m stuck! I’m stuck in my dress! Help me! Help-“

“Stop moving,” he groaned when she kept wriggling around.

Sometimes he wondered how that smart IT girl who blushed at least ten times a day because of her babbling could be the same woman who sometimes behaved like a little child when she was drunk. Normally she let him hold her and rock her into sleep like he did with their daughter, but other nights she was too hyper to keep quiet and unmoving which could really become exhausting, especially when she was trying have sex with him while he tried to be reasonable.

Tonight seemed to be one of those nights.

When Felicity finally kept still, Oliver freed her from her dress and was attacked by her lips on his just a second afterwards.

Yep, he thought, this was probably going to be exhausting.

“Felicity” he said against her lips, holding her wrists in his hands and carefully pushed her away again. “Shouldn’t we delay this to some point in the future when you aren’t drunk?”

“I’m not drunk,” she protested, but apart from the slur in her speech that already revealed the truth, Felicity also started to hiccup, making her words sound even more noncredible. “Besides… it’s already tradition to have sex now.”

“It’s tradition to have sex while you are drunk?” he asked, cocking his head.

“No,” she giggled, wiggling her hips in a way that made Oliver clench his jaws. “It’s tradition to have sex after you got all jealous.”

Oliver looked up at Felicity’s smirking face and furrowed his brows in confusion.

“What?”

Felicity sighed and rolled her eyes, looking at him like he was the biggest idiot in the room. Well, given that the only person he could be compared to was his genius wife, he probably was, but he had actually no idea what she was talking about.

“That guy who said he was you, but of course wasn’t you because how could there be two of you?” she asked, her gaze suddenly fading away like she was seriously thinking about an answer to that question. She then shook her head, shaking off the thoughts and looked back at him again. “You were totally jealous and then he said mean things about me and then you went all grrrrr like a tiger who wants to maul its prey and – or no! No!”

Oliver bit his tongue to not burst out in laughter as Felicity interrupted her babbling, staring at him with wide eyes and an amused expression in her face.

“You were a tiger who went al grrrrr on another tiger – a less muscular, less handsome, lying tiger – that barged into your mating territory and was trying to steal your mating opportunity. And you chased him away with your grrrrr and now you need to prove your dominance to your mating opportunity.”

Oliver opened his mouth to say something, but he felt like he lost his ability to speak. The only sound he was able to make was a low gurgling. So he closed his mouth again and just stared at her with disbelieve.

There he had thought he knew everything about her and still Felicity managed to surprise him.

He knew she was smart. People had to be pretty ignorant to not notice that about her. Felicity had knowledge of the craziest things and more often than not he had no idea what she was talking about.

But this. This was…

Oliver didn’t even know what to say about that.

“Are you calling yourself a mating opportunity now?”

“It’s a scientific term” she told him with a serious expression in the face. “You need to focus here.”

Oliver just nodded, biting down on his tongue with more force.

“With you it is always like that,” Felicity continued. “You are jealous, you keep the guys from your patch and then you are showing your asserted dominance by having sex with me.”

“You’ve analyzed our sex life?”

Felicity nodded. “I’m smart.”

“That you are,” Oliver laughed lowly.

“Well, now you need to make sure your mating opportunity knows that you are the alpha male, so here we go.”

“Hm…” Oliver made, tugging a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Shouldn’t my mating opportunity be fully aware when I do so? I mean… she has to really get who’s the alpha male.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip and took in a sharp breath.

“I haven’t thought about that,” she whispered. “You might be right.”

“So we will have sex tomorrow,” Oliver grinned, not even trying to hide his amusement anymore. “First thing in the morning.”

“No,” Felicity sighed. “I will have a hangover then.”

This woman, he thought to himself. Even when drunk she was still smarter than most people.

“In the afternoon maybe?” he suggested, trying to keep the little bit of seriousness he still had.

“Emmy,” Felicity answered, knowing their daughter’s name was enough to remind him that sex during the day with a baby in the house was kind of not happening.

“So tomorrow night?”

“Okay,” Felicity sighed, kicking her shoes off and rolling down from him to lie next to him on the mattress. “Sex tomorrow night. I will hold you to that.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Oliver grinned, rolling on his side to face Felicity and take in the sight of her in her beautiful lace underwear.

“Oliver, you are not allowed to ogle me. I am drunk and not in my right mind and sex right now won’t prove your dominance to me and that could cause me to think that you’re not really an alpha male and that might actually make me leave your mating territory to find someone I can rather accept as an alpha male.”

Oliver just snorted, shaking his head and drawing his arms out to pull Felicity close to him.

“Come here, my little mating opportunity,” he whispered and enjoyed when she jiggled closer until she was snuggled against his chest.

It didn’t take long for her to fall asleep while Oliver kept moving his hands through her hair, playing with some strands. He enjoyed the feeling of her heart beating against the side of his torso and her breath ghosting over his chest.

She might be exhausting when she was drunk. Still he wouldn’t have it any other way. He would miss out so much fun, he thought right before falling asleep.


	42. Beauty in the darkest hours

“Oliver,” she whispered as she saw him hesitate, standing still without any will to move.

“We shouldn’t have to do this. _You_ shouldn’t have to do this.”

Sighing, Felicity took a step towards him, slid her arms around his neck and pecked his lips with hers for a short, comforting kiss. Still she didn’t get any reaction of him. All he did was looking down at her with sad eyes.

“Oliver, we’ve talked about this,” Felicity whispered, not really sure why she whispered at all. It wasn’t like they had much audience. “We won’t be able to stop that guy who is walking around in our city raping and killing women if we don’t get help. And if this is what it takes to get him to help us, then we are going to do it.”

“How many more sacrifices will we have to make for the safety of our city?” he asked. “I know I’ve promised to keep my city safe, but why does that mean that my family has to take such risks? Thea is running around masked in the city. I’m not happy about that, but I have to accept it. But this? This is wrong and it is too much.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, caressing Oliver’s cheeks with her hands and smiled at him halfheartedly. She knew Oliver wasn’t too fond of what they were up to do. Felicity knew that. Oliver had made that perfectly clear.

 

_“Look who’s there! If that isn’t the Queen’s family’s fastest sprinter,” John laughed when Felicity walked into Verdant, Emmeline walking in front of her on wobbly legs, holding her mother’s index fingers tightly in her little fists._

_The little girl giggled happily at her godfather’s words, walking towards them. As soon as she stood right in front of him, she let go of Felicity’s fingers, reaching her arms out for John to pick her up which he did immediately, kissing her rosy cheek._

_“John!” Emmeline called out although you had to have a lot of fantasy to actually hear that name. It sounded more like ‘Lonn’ but she had made clear from the first time saying it that she meant John Diggle._

_“When did you come back? Oliver didn’t call me," Felicity said with a frown. “We thought this was going to take longer. I assume he didn’t want to help?”_

_John sighed, eying up Felicity with an expression of uncertainty in his eyes._

_“You should go down to Oliver and talk to him. He will tell you more about what happened. In the meantime I’ll go eat some ice cream with my three favorite girls.”_

_“Give Lyla and Sara a hug from me,” Felicity asked and watched John and her daughter leave before she hurried to go down to the basement._

_It had to be really bad if John refused to at least give her a hint, she thought while typing in the code for the door down to the lair. As if things weren’t bad enough as they were right now._

_Those last three days Starling City had been scene for three of the probably cruelest murders in history. Women had been attacked, raped and killed. Their bodies had been found at public places like the stairs of the courthouse, prettily draped of course. The second body had been found by children. The thought still made Felicity shiver._

_Worst of all had been that they still hadn’t caught him. They had barely found out anything about him. Whenever they had thought they found him, he had disappeared again, so none of the information they had gotten had led them anywhere._

_The only thing helpful they had found out about that guy was his name and his vita. The last had led them to an old friend of him which so happened to be someone they all knew too well since he had spent months threatening all of Starling City’s citizens and the team in particular._

_So John and Oliver had decided to fly to the Lian Yu and actually talk to Slade Wilson, asking for his help. As crazy as it sounded he had seemed to be their only hope._

_Maybe they should have known that visiting him wasn’t a good idea, she thought as she watched Oliver. He stood at one the tables with med supplies. He had his hands put on the table, his head hanging between his strong arms, his body slowly rocking from the heels to the balls of his feet and back again before he suddenly slammed his fists down on the tabletop and wiped it clean from the supplies._

_“That bad, hm?” she asked, cocking her head._

_Oliver turned around immediately, glaring at her angrily, but it didn’t last much longer than a heartbeat before his eyes softened, his lips curling up in a sad smile and he spread his arms for her to step in and hug him which she did without hesitation._

_“I missed you,” he whispered to her hair, kissing her temple and breathing in her scent. “Where’s Emmy?”_

_“Eating ice cream with John, Lyla and Sara to give us enough time to talk about what happened,” she answered, pulling back slightly to look at him, without stepping out of his strong hold around her waist. “So… I guess he didn’t want to help?”_

_Oliver snorted, walking back and taking her with him. He sat down on the edge of the table, Felicity standing between his legs, her arms put around his shoulders while his were slid around her waist, keeping her close._

_“He demands a reward,” Oliver sighed, his thumbs drawing lazy patterns on her hips._

_“What does he want? Being released from the prison of the island?”_

_Oliver huffed a laugh. “No. I guess he is smart enough to know that that will never happen.”_

_Felicity nodded, her fingers playing with the hair at the back of his neck. Patiently she waited for him to continue._

_Oliver had locked his eyes on hers, eying her up closely. He took in a deep breath before he answered, “He wants to see you.”_

_Felicity’s eyes widened in surprise. “What?”_

_“It’s not going to happen,” Oliver tried to calm her immediately, tightening his hold on her. “I vowed to you to always protect you from any harm, and I will keep that vow for the rest of my life. So we are not going to do this. We will find another way, just like you have always told me.”_

_Felicity looked at him, trying to figure out how to make clear to him that maybe for the first time there wasn’t another way. They had been trying to catch that guy for three days without any success. And every day they didn’t find him was one more day he could kill someone which was something they couldn’t let happen, no matter what it took._

_“Okay,” Felicity sighed, framing his face with her hands and pecking his lips shortly. “Oliver, that guy is killing innocent women. And if there is even a glint of hope that he might help us than we have to act on that. We have to. And regarding your vow I am highly sure the only thing you vowed to protect me from were kangaroos. So unless there are kangaroos living on that island I suggest we will fly there as soon as we can to stop the killings.”_

_Oliver opened his mouth, obviously trying to protest, but Felicity slapped her hand in front of his lips, silencing him before he could say anything._

_“Oliver, we have to do this."_

_“We don’t even know if he means it. Maybe he can’t tell us anything helpful or he will play us to help him. Slade hates me. He hates all of us for catching him.”_

_“I know. But we have to try. It’s the least we can do.”_

_“But-“_

_She pressed her lips on his, softly nibbling his bottom lip before she stated, “Laurel was going to take care of Emmy tomorrow anyway so I’m going to call her and ask if she can take her for one more night.”_

_Oliver nodded with a sigh. “I still don’t like that idea.”_

“Come on,” she whispered, tugging at his hand. “Let’s go. The sooner we meet him, the sooner we can go home.”

Oliver nodded, opening the loop down to the prison, staring at the ladder that was going to lead them down to his enemy.

“So…” Felicity said. “You want me to climb in first?”

“No,” he answered with rough voice.

“So you want to climb in first?” she suggested.

Oliver looked at her and sighed. “No.”

Felicity cocked her head, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Oliver, I didn’t come all the way here to fly back without even trying to get Slade to help us especially since I’m afraid of heights which means that I felt like I was going to die all flight long. Besides it is freezing cold here, so could we please go down there to be at least protected from the wind?”

Sighing, Oliver nodded. He stepped down onto the second rung of the ladder, waving at her to put her feet on the first step. It wasn’t easy to climb down like that, Oliver’s chest pressed against her back, but she knew he needed that.

This island had caused him so much pain, and she knew that this increased his general need of protecting her a lot. So if this was what he needed to feel better about taking her to the island and bringing her face to face with the man who had put a sword against her throat, threatening to kill her a few years ago. Then she wasn’t going to argue him.

As soon as her feet touched the ground, she turned around, expecting to see Slade Wilson in a small cell, but her vision was blocked by Oliver’s chest. He stood right in front of her, one of his arms slightly held behind him as if he was trying to not only block her vision, but also her whole body from what was on his other side or rather who was.

“I was betting with myself how long it was going to take you to come here.”

The sound of his voice chased a cold shiver down her spine. It had been so long since his memory had haunted her for the last time. Oliver seemed to sense her discomfort because he immediately held out his hand behind him for her to take and she did, closing both of her hands around his.

“So…” Slade said after a while. “Let me take a look at your Felicity.”

“No,” Oliver said strongly, squeezing her hand. “You will tell us everything you know that will help us catch Henderson, and then you’ll get to see her.”

“That’s not how this is going to work, boy!” Slade growled. “I will see her, and then I will tell you what I know. Not before.”

Felicity could feel Oliver’s body tense, wanting to protest and force his point, but Felicity knew that Slade wasn’t going to give in and given the serial killer they had to catch as soon as possible she took in a deep breath and stepped forward, stopping right beside Oliver, his hand still between hers.

Slade’s eyes snapped towards her immediately, taking in every inch of her with a smile that couldn’t be described as anything other than cruel. Felicity could almost feel the coldness of his sword against her throat, but she didn’t look away, didn’t even blink. She wasn’t going to show him any sign of weakness.

They had won against Slade. Together.  
And that was what mattered most.

“How’s your daughter, Mrs. Queen?”

Before Felicity could really process what he had said, Oliver had already pushed her back behind him, blocking her from Slade.

“I’ve allowed you to see her,” he growled. “But you are not allowed to talk to her. We have fulfilled our side of the deal. Now it’s your turn. Where do we find Henderson?”

As Slade started talking, Felicity bent her head forwards, leaning her forehead between Oliver’s shoulder blades. She closed her eyes and took in deep breaths, trying to calm down her wildly drumming heart.

How could Slade know about Emmeline? How was that even possible? They lived so far away from here and Lian Yu wasn’t known for its great gossip magazines. It should have been impossible for him to find our anything about her existence.

But then it was Slade Wilson.

“That’s all you have to know to find him,” Slade finally said, and Felicity lifted her head from Oliver’s back, readying herself to go back up again.

She hadn’t heard any word of what he had told Oliver. Her thoughts were still busy trying to process the possible threat they might have to face in the future.

“If any of this is a ruse-“

“It’s not. There is no fun in letting Henderson kill you. I will do that myself. I am a man of my word” Slade growled, his voice once again sending a shiver down her spine. “And one day I will make the promise of taking everything and everyone from you come true, boy. I am a patient man and while you keep assembling people that you love around you, I will plan on how to-“

Oliver just turned around, shaking his head as he looked at Felicity.

“Don’t listen to him. Let’s go.”

Slade kept talking, threatening to destroy their life as soon as he got off the island and back to Starling City. Felicity did her best to not listen to him, to shut her mind from the pointless threats. Slade was caged here, and there was no way for him to get out of his cell without help.

Still she felt her lungs burning with the need for air as she finally got up on the surface again, Oliver right behind her. She tried to breathe, but her lungs refused to listen to the orders her brain was giving. Her heart pounded against her ribs, threatening to crack them, and she felt tears streaming down her cheeks.

“Felicity,” Oliver said softly, turning her around on her shoulder and looking at her worriedly. “Felicity, you need to breathe. Look at me. Look at me. You have to breathe.”

He framed her face, gently forcing her to look at him and calm her down, but instead Felicity’s body started trembling, her legs giving in. Oliver pulled her into his arms, holding her close as she started crying, her lungs finally filling with short breaths of air.

“Everything’s okay,” he whispered into her hair. “Everything’s okay. You’re safe. We’re safe.”

“How- How did he- How did he know about- about Emmeline?” she sobbed, tightly grabbing his jacket to press herself even closer towards him.

“He doesn’t, Felicity,” Oliver answered, tightening his hold on her. “He found out about us because I forgot to take off my wedding band, but he doesn’t know anything about Emmy. He just made a good guess. He doesn’t know anything about her and even if he did, he will never come back to Starling. He will never even come near our daughter.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

Felicity felt herself calming down slowly. Her breaths evened while Oliver still held her, gently rubbing her back and kissing the crown of her head.

Oliver was right. Slade had just tried to get under her skin and scare her. There was no way Slade was ever coming near their daughter and even if he did manage to get off the island and to Starling City, Oliver was never going to let anything happen to Emmeline and neither was she.

“I’m sorry,” Felicity finally whispered, pulling back to wipe the tears from her face. “Short panic attack, I guess.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” he answered, gently caressing her cheek. “Slade has the annoying habit of hitting people right in the heart. Trust me, I don’t feel any better about his threat than you do.”

Felicity nodded with a sigh.

“You know, last time I’ve talked to him when I was here with Thea, he asked about you. I swear to God I was that close to just kill him right then.”

Again Felicity nodded, giving him a sad smile.

“You should use the radio equipment of the plane to call John and tell him about what Slade told us. The sooner Henderson is in jail, the better. I guess with Lyla’s help they will be able to put him down in his hide-out. It will take a few hours before we’re home again, so they should do this without you.”

Oliver nodded, taking her hand. “Especially since it’s our anniversary, and we will have to celebrate two wonderful years without any too bad incidents, right?”

“Well, we definitely have to celebrate that,” Felicity smiled, rising onto her tiptoes to peck his lips shortly.

“Sorry, we have to spend our wedding anniversary with this and… here,” Oliver apologized looking around with a sigh.

Felicity followed his eyes, taking in their surroundings. It was still dark, so she couldn’t see much, but she remembered some things from the two other times she had been here.

“You know, thanks to the time difference we will still have a full anniversary back in Starling. Besides, I think we could be at worse places,” she responded with a shrug of her shoulders. “Last time we’ve been here we’ve discussed how impossible the idea of the two of us together is. And now we’re here. Married. Proud parents of a smart, little girl.”

Oliver smiled, putting his hands to her hips to pull her closer towards him.

“You know, last year you suggested that we make it a tradition to make each other vow something to the other just like we have done with our wedding vows,” he then said. “I’ve spent those last days thinking about something you could vow me and now I do know something.”

Felicity looked up at him expectantly.

“I want you to vow me to never lose the gift of always seeing beauty even in the darkest hours.”

“I promise to always see beauty even in the darkest hours,” Felicity smiled and Oliver bent down to kiss her softly.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” she said back. “Let’s go home.”


	43. Thunderstorms

He knew the thunderstorm was going to come.

It had been said in the weather report and even without the meteorologists telling him he would have known it because of the loud patter of the rain against the windows and the howling of the wind, bringing the dark clouds he could see from where he lay in the bed closer towards Starling City.

Oliver took a deep breath, looking down at Felicity, who was deeply asleep while cuddled up to his side. Her head rested on his chest, her right hand were put to his Bratva tattoo and her legs tangled with his. He lifted the strand of blonde hair that lay right across his face and tugged it behind her ear, enabling him to take a closer look to her face.

She was so peaceful, he thought. When they had finally gotten together, he had spent full nights just watching her sleep, admiring how much at peace with herself she was. He had almost envied her for that, and he still did sometimes. He had gotten better over the time, falling asleep faster, not having so many nightmares. It had surely been the safety Felicity had been making him feel that had changed his sleeping habits.

Nights of thunderstorms still were tough, though.

They reminded him of the night on the boat, the night that had followed up to all that horrible events that had changed his entire life.

The boat had sunk. He had thought he had seen Sara die. He had seen his father shoot a friend. He had seen his father killing himself. He had suffered through all those endless days on the island, in Hong Kong and in Russia and back on the island again. He had become a killer, had come home as a stranger to the people he had loved. He had seen his city being destroyed by an earthquake his parents had been helping to cause. He had watched his mother die by the hand of a former friend. He had seen his city being attacked by the same former friend. He had been scared to be himself, pushing away his soulmate. He had-

The first rumble of thunder pulled him out of his thoughts. His arms tightened around Felicity, trying to hold onto her as the first memories flashed up in front of his inner eyes.

The first night of a thunderstorm after they had come together, Oliver had quietly left the bedroom, deciding to lie down on the couch and live through his fears there where he hadn’t had to be afraid of hurting Felicity the way he had hurt his mother his first night back after the island. Even imagining that he could accidently hurt her had been too much for him. But of course it hadn’t taken long until Felicity had joined him on the couch, placing his head on her heart to calm him. He had held her close the entire time, listening to the beat of her heart.

Oliver turned his head slightly, pressing his nose to the crown of Felicity’s head, inhaling her sweet scent. He felt his heartbeat slowing down and smiled softly. Felicity still was the best medicine for all of his fears.

“Felicity?” he whispered as quietly as he could, not willing to wake her up, but loud enough for her to hear in case she wasn’t as deeply asleep as it seemed.

Felicity moved slightly, rubbing her cheek against his chest and turning more on her stomach, so she almost lay on top of him. Her right hand moved closer to his neck. She then sighed sleepily before becoming all motionless once again.

Another flash enlightened the room for a short moment and a dark thunder grumbled through the clouds before he heard a sleepy, “Hm?”

He moved his hand through her hair, whispering, “I love you.”

Although he couldn’t see it, Oliver knew Felicity was smiling. He could feel the corners of her lips lifting against his chest. He smiled down at her, responding to the smile he couldn’t see with one she couldn’t see either.

An unexpected loud thunder made Oliver wince, his whole body jerking at the sudden noise, and he immediately cursed himself when he felt Felicity shift on his body, her head turning until her chin rested on his chest, and she looked at him with small eyes, the tiredness obvious even in the dark.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s okay,” she whispered, moving up a little, so she could press her face to the side of his neck, peppering his pulse point with sweet, little kisses.

Oliver sighed, closing his eyes and enjoying Felicity’s caressing. Her warm breath tickled his skin when she slid her lips up his neck and his jaw until she reached his cheek. She didn’t busy herself with his stubble for too long, instead moving right to his earlobe. She pulled the soft skin between her lips, biting down carefully before soothing the bite with her tongue.

“There should be more thunderstorms, I guess,” Oliver hummed, turning his head to give his wife better access for the journey she took with her lips on his skin. He placed his hands to her hips, slowly rubbing himself against her. “If this is what happens every time there is a thunderstorm, then those will soon become my favorite nights.”

He felt Felicity laugh against his skin while her lips were moving from his earlobe across his cheeks towards his lips. She pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth before snuggling her nose to his, her lips hovering over Oliver’s.

“I’m glad you enjoy the distraction,” she smiled, leaning down to kiss him.

Oliver let his head sink deeper into the pillow, his hands sliding up and down Felicity’s thigh, kneading the flesh. Sighing, Felicity parted her lips from his, moving them down to his neck, tilting her head to get better access while Oliver kept stroking her thighs, still enjoying her caressing. He was about to roll her onto her back and giving back those caressing when Felicity’s lips stilled on his neck before her head lifted, and she sat back on his thighs.

“Felicity?” he asked confused, purposefully wincing when a new flash enlightened the room. “What about distracting me from the thunder storm? I’m still suffering and need all your love and attention to calm down. Another kiss would be nice for example.”

“Well, I would do that, Mr. Queen, since I enjoy those distractions as much as you do, but unfortunately it looks like our daughter is training her Ninja skills again,” she said with a nod towards the baby monitor on his nightstand.

Oliver turned his head, watching the small display. Emmeline had been starting to walk on her own those last weeks. She still fell often, actually had a bruise on her right cheek from falling on her toy, but she was getting better, managing to at least make a few steps on her own without needing to hold someone’s fingers or the furniture for support.

Ever since she had learned to crawl, Emmeline had also started to climb on the furniture. She was very creative to get to higher places, and they had had problems to actually get her to stay down to stop her from falling. It hadn’t been easy. Emmeline was nosy and in a way almost fearless. She didn’t seem to hesitate to try new things, to climb higher or to take more risks. Felicity had blamed his crazy Ninja skills for that.

Right now Oliver could see Emmeline standing in her crib, her arms holding onto the bed as she tried to lift her right leg over the grid.

“Come on, she’s not gonna-“ Oliver began, but stopped as soon as he could see Emmeline’s foot placed on the upper ridge of the grid, her whole face shining with a happy smile he could barely see behind the pacifier.

“I’ll go get her,” Felicity yawned, kissing his cheek before sliding out of bed and ambling towards the nursery.

Oliver watched with a great measure of pride how his little daughter actually managed to climb out of her bed. Her hands still held onto the ridge of the grid of her bed as her feet swayed slightly above the ground, her tiny body not long enough to reach the floor. Every normal kid was probably just going to start crying to alarm someone and get them to help, but his daughter was different from that. She just let go of the ridge, falling down on the floor, well cushioned by her diaper. And still she didn’t cry. She just turned around and began crawling towards the door and out of the reach of the camera.

Smiling Oliver switched off the baby monitor and lay back. One day his daughter’s behavior was surely giving him heart attacks, but for now he was just being proud, worried that she might get hurt, but still proud. She was so much like him although most people just saw the similarities to her mother because a lot of her more obvious characteristics she had inherited from her mother. For example she loved to babble, and she always smiled, and she was just as a ray of sunshine as her mother.

“Dadda!” she exclaimed happily as Felicity returned to the bedroom, holding their daughter in her arms. Even behind her pacifier he could she her smile.

“Why aren’t you asleep? Little children should be sleeping that late in the night,” he tried to explain to her seriously, but he couldn’t help the smile that spread on his face as soon as Felicity let Emmeline down onto his lap and the little girl framed her father’s face with her tiny hands. She spit out her pacifier and put her now free lips on his jaw, kissing him. “I can’t imagine how this night can get better.”

Laughing lowly, Felicity lay down beside him, kissing the other side of his face.

“I’ll take that back,” Oliver sighed, closing his eyes. “This is even better.”

He couldn’t even care about the thunderstorm that was still going on outside as the two most important females in his life kept kissing him, snuggled to his body. Their warmth were reaching deep into his heart, warming not only his body but his soul.

They slept cuddling with each other. Oliver lay on his back, Emmeline sleeping on his chest with her head right under his, her nose nuzzling her mother’s whose legs tangled with her husband’s as her breasts were pressed to the side of his upper body. The fingers of their hands were entwined on their daughter’s back.

Maybe thunderstorms weren’t that bad after all.


	44. Secrets

Oliver was keeping a secret from her.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t ever kept secrets from each other. Even when they had gotten together, it had taken time before Oliver had started opening up about his five years away. Felicity had accepted that, knowing that he was going to open up to her when he was ready to. And he had opened up to her. He had told her almost everything he had been through, and Felicity was convinced that he was going to tell her about the things she didn’t knew yet when he was ready to. She wasn’t going to pressure him about it because she trusted him, and she knew that he trusted her.

Those last days something had been different, though, and it was bugging her that much that she felt almost unable to sleep or to eat. She had barely talked to Thea or Laurel or anyone else, not exactly feeling like chatting away about banalities.

Sighing, she got up, tossed away Oliver’s pillow she had along with his blanket taken from the bed to put on the couch and started walking up and down in the dark living room.

It had started a week ago when he had suddenly canceled their dinner date, saying that he had totally forgotten about an important meeting with the board members that evening. Felicity would have known that it had been a lie even if his personal assistant hadn’t called her to tell her that he had forgotten his wallet in his office when he had left.

Oliver had always been a bad liar which had been why she had already known that he had lied to her about that alleged meeting before she had gotten that call. She had never believed any of his lies, even back when he had asked to help him with her IT-skills when they had been strangers to each other.

So how exactly had he expected that she was going to believe him now after more than two years of marriage?

First she had just thought that maybe he had had a rough day and hadn’t exactly felt like going out for dinner, but hadn’t want to hurt or upset her, so he had made up that lie about the meeting to have an excuse not to go. But when he had come home all smiley-face, kissing her in apology and making jokes about how something like that would have never happened to her, she knew it hadn’t been something like that.

Within the last days incidents like that had happened again and again. Oliver was coming home later and later from work, cancelling long planned dates with stupid lies and sometimes Felicity even caught him watching her like he was nervous.

When she heard the key turning in the lock of the front door, Felicity stood still, crossing her arms in front of her chest and looking towards where she could see Oliver’s shadow on the wall. Holding her breath, she waited.

Oliver didn’t even bother to switch on the light because of course he didn’t need it to see her. His eyes were used to the dark from all the Arrow work.

“Why are you standing in the dark?” he asked, cocking his head before switching the light on. His eyes glanced towards his blanket and pillow on the couch and his eyebrows lifted. “And why is that here?”

“Because you,” Felicity said firmly, “are going to sleep on the couch until you tell me what the hell you keep from me.”

She almost expected Oliver to deny everything and say something stupid like ‘I have no idea what you are talking about’. But instead he sighed, massaging the back of his neck with his hand.

“You’ve realized that, hm?”

“You know, you have always been a bad liar, Oliver. I just didn’t expect you to actually feel the need to lie to me anymore,” Felicity said angrily. “So you are going to explain to me what the hell you’ve been doing those last nights, or I swear to God I will-“

“Put on shoes.”

“What?” Felicity asked frowning, slightly confused from his interruption.

“Put on shoes. I’ll go get Emmeline,” he said, already turning around to hurry upstairs and get their sleeping daughter from the crib.

“But-“

Oliver turned back towards her and approached her. Before Felicity could say anything, he framed her face with his hands, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

“You want to know what I’ve been doing. So I want to show you,” he told her. “Please put on your shoes while I go get Emmy.”

Felicity was still confused about all of this. What the hell did he want to show her?

But she put on her shoes and got in the car anyway. Because she loved Oliver and even if they had this thing going on right now, she still trusted him.

They drove in silence. Felicity kept her gaze to the side, looking out of her window, just occasionally looking back to where Emmeline slept in the baby seat. Although she tried to avoid looking at Oliver, she could feel his eyes on her as he glanced towards her every now and then while driving the car across the city.

She had no idea where they were going and although she didn’t feel as worried about whatever it had been that had made him lie to her, she still couldn’t think about a good enough reason for his behavior.

Felicity didn’t know how long they’ve been driving when Oliver directed the car into a small alley and then stopped the car. When she turned her head to look at him, she saw his eyes were already on her again.

“Where are we?” she asked, looking out of the window to an unfamiliar house.

“This is our new home,” he explained softly, nodding his head for her to get out of the car while opening his door already.

Felicity hesitated, even as Oliver was already out of the car and opened the door to the backseats to take sleeping Emmeline into his arms, she was still staring at the house, trying to understand what Oliver had said. It was him who finally opened her door, holding out a hand for her to take. And she did. Hand in hand they walked a few steps until they had a perfect view on the house. Oliver slid his arm that wasn’t holding Emmeline close to his chest around Felicity’s shoulders, pulling her closer.

“When we moved into our house shortly after our wedding, we always said that it was just going to be a stop on our way. We said that we were going to live there until we had kids and needed more space with a larger garden, but then everything went so fast with Emmy, and we totally forgot about all those plans. When you thought you were pregnant a few months back, I realized that now might be the time to take that step.”

Felicity tore her eyes away from the house, looking at Oliver instead whose eyes were still locked on the white front of what seemed to were becoming there new house.

“So you bought this house?”

“No,” Oliver laughed, looking at her. “I built it. Well, I let it build to be honest. I am not exactly experienced in work like that, but I sat down with an architect and told him everything about you and everything you have ever said you loved or hated about a house and together we created the plan for this, and I tasked a building firma with it. Last week the works have been almost finished, and I got here to make further plans. I wanted to furnish our bedroom to take you here at the weekend and spend our first night in our new home, making plans with you. I wanted it to be a surprise, but of course I am such a bad liar when it comes to you…”

He shook his head with a laugh and kissed her temple.

Felicity felt her heart lift at all of this. She had already imagined the most terrible things. She had thought that Oliver had been searching a way out of their marriage, that he might have gotten bored of her and maybe had even started an affair.

At the same time a knot formed in her stomach, knowing that she had mistrusted him and even worse had spoilt the surprise he had worked so hard on.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, tears of joy and relief and maybe even a little shame in her eyes.

“Nothing to be sorry for. I should have probably told you. I hope you are not too mad?” he asked, his eyes expressing a slight sign of worry.

Felicity shook her head, leaning her cheek against his shoulder. “No, I’m not mad. I love it although I have to say that I’d appreciate the next time you might just tell me that you are planning a surprise for me.”

“You will bug me about it until I tell you, and then there will be no surprise,” Oliver laughed.

“At least it will save you from sleeping on the couch,” Felicity laughed back, stepping out of her arms and approaching the front door to the home he had built for their family. “Do I get a viewing now or do I have to win you over with sex for ruining the surprise first?”

“Well, I could show you the kitchen counters,” Oliver answered, following her. “They might combine both of those ideas.”


	45. Moving Drabbles

“Three nurseries and a guest room,” Felicity nodded. “I like that.”

“Oh, no, no,” Oliver said hastily, taking her hand and kissing her palm. “The guest room is downstairs. These are all nurseries.”

Felicity’s eyes became wide. “What did you just say? Four nurseries? Have you lost your mind? What are we going to do with four nurseries?”

Oliver smirked, pulling her closer until they were chest to chest. “We are going to have a lot of sex followed by a lot of babies.”

“Oh really?” She asked. “You really want to have four babies?”

“Sure,” Oliver answered, shrugging his shoulders and lowering his lips to her neck. “I want a lot of babies.”

“Oliver, we already have one, and I agreed to have a second. I might agree to a third, but I will wait with that decision until baby No. 2 is here, and I can make a rough estimate how the third baby will turn out and by the way we are not going to plan a third baby before we have even started planning the second.”

“We already have planned the second,” Oliver responded against the skin of her neck. 

“We haven’t,” Felicity disagreed.

“I have an appointment marked in my calendar that says ‘Make a baby’.”

“That appointment is in months, Oliver,” Felicity laughed. “And now come on. You wanted to show me the rest of the house. We can still figure out what to do with those rooms when I’ve seen the rest.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Yellow?”

“Urgh!” Felicity answered, making a disgusted face when Oliver held up the bucket of yellow paint. “That’s even worse than the orange one. See, even Emmy thinks it’s ridiculous.”

Their daughter was indeed laughing, hiding her face behind her hands before she reached out her little arms for her father to lift her from the floor.

“The two of you have no idea what colors are good,” Oliver grumbled, putting the bucket away nonetheless and picking Emmeline up from the floor.

“Come on, we gotta hurry. She’s getting tired,” Felicity said when their 14 month old daughter started whining.

“How about red? At least it’s our color?” Oliver suggested and Felicity sighed.

“Honey, I think if we actually paint our walls red, we will never sleep again. It’s too aggressive.”

“How about you suggest a color?”

“I already did,” Felicity answered, picking up a different bucket. “Green.”

“Felicity,” he sighed.

“Oliver,” she answered with a sigh of her own.

For a minute they just looked at each other before they both burst out in laughter, not sure what was so funny, but being amused nonetheless.

“Okay, green it is then,” Oliver agreed when their laughs were mixed with their daughter’s loud whining.

He hurried to press a kiss to the top of her head, calming her down, before sliding his arm around Felicity’s waist and pulling her closer. Who cared about the color of the walls if he was going to share his bed with the woman he loved, hopefully making another beautiful baby soon?

 

* * *

 

“Maybe,” Oliver sighed, but smirked and held his bottle of beer for his friend to clink with his. “But that view is just too… hot.”

“Gross,” Roy groaned, leaning at the counter next to Oliver’s other side and taking a hugh gulp of his beer. “I didn’t agree to help you setting up all the furniture to hear something like that.”

Oliver just smirked, taking a gulp from his own beer while never stopping to look at his beaufiul wife who was trying to hang up the lamp they had bough yesterday.

Her whole body was stretched as she tried to get high enough to get the lamp where it belonged. The hem of her shirt had ridden up slightly, allowing Oliver to see a small piece of her creamy skin just above the hem of her jeans. And that ass…

Sighing, he put his bottle away and stepped behind her.

“Need a little help here?” he asked, biting down on her earlobe slightly before taking the lamp out of her hands and getting it in the right place.

“Thank you,” Felicity sighed, turning around and pressing a kiss to the underside of her jaw. “You’re my hero. I just couldn’t get it up.”

“It was nice watching you try, though,” Oliver answered and let his hands slide over her round ass to make sure she knew the reason why it had been so much fun. 

Felicity got up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to Oliver’s lip that immediately earned them a “Gross!” from Roy.

 

* * *

 

 

“How far along are you with the...?” Felicity stopped, stepping towards the stairs where all the photos she had picked with Thea to be hung up on the wall were already placed exactly like she had described it to Oliver.

“You like it?” he asked, turning around towards her.

“I love it,” she answered, stepping close to him and sliding one arm around his middle, so she could admire the great collection of photos from their family and friends. “But you forgot one.”

She pointed towards an empty spot a little higher on the wall where she had wanted the photo of young Oliver and baby Thea to be placed.

“Oh, I was waiting for you to hang up that one,” Oliver explained, handing hammer and nail out to her before he bent down and ducked his head between her thighs and then straightened up again and lifted her from the floor with Felicity sitting on his shoulders.

“Oh my god, Oliver, let me back down right now! You know I am afraid of heights! Let me back down!” she screeched, gripping his hair to try and get something to hold onto, but his hair was too short to actually hold onto it. “Oliver, if I fall down I-”

“Felicity, I’m not letting you fall down,” he said strongly.

Felicity bit her tongue. “Promise.”

Even though she couldn’t see his face, she knew he was smiling when he answered, “Promise.”

And Felicity smiled, too, placing the nail against the wall where she wanted the photo to be placed later.

 

* * *

 

“Okay, that has to be the last box for the kitchen,” Felicity sighed, stretching herself to soothe the pain in her back. “I’ll go get the stuff in the bathroom, so we can actually move into our new home right away.”

Oliver came to stand behind her, replacing her hands with his own, massaging the small of her back while peppering her neck with little kisses.

“Let’s spend one last night here. The beds are still set up since we replaced most of the furniture, and we are all tired,” he suggested, sliding his arms around her middle, and she melted against his torso with a sigh.

“Okay,” she yawned. “One last night. But I should warn you that I am not in the mood for sexy times. Way too tired and-”

Felicity stopped herself cocking her head and frowned. Oliver followed her gaze at where their daughter was climbing into one of the boxes.

“What do you think she’s doing?” Felicity asked.

“Maybe she thinks we only take her with us if she is in one of the boxes,” Oliver made a guess, smiling at the picture of his daughter sitting in that box, waiting for something to happen.

“Let’s take her to our bed tonight,” Felicity proposed.

Oliver nodded, pressing a last kiss to his wife’s neck before getting and picking his daughter up.

“No, no, Emmy. You are not traveling in one of those boxes. You are too precious to me as to let a remover take care of you,” he explained, kissing her cheek and the girl giggled happily.

 

* * *

 

 

“I’m gonna miss this house,” Felicity whispered into dark and saw Oliver’s eyes snap open like he had just waited for her to say something.

“You can still decide that we are staying here,” Oliver whispered back, pushing some hair out of her face, carefully avoiding waking up their daughter who was sleeping between them. “We don’t have to move.”

“No, we have to move. That house that you built for us is perfect. We will have more space, a larger garden, a pool,… Rationally speaking, moving into that new house is the smartest decision,” she explained in a whisper. “It’s just that this is the first house we bought together and where it was just the two of us. It’s the place we brought Emmeline after we have been released from the hospital after her birth. There are memories here that I am going to miss.”

Oliver nodded and took her hand, kissing her knuckles.

“We will create new memories. We still have so much time for that, so many years to look forward to.”

Felicity nodded and put her hand to his cheeks, his stubble scratching her palm in the best way possible. She whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“Love you,” Emmeline babbled in her sleep, making her parents giggle, but both of them soon slapped their hands in front of their lips to subdue them, not wanting to wake their daughter up.

Felicity and Oliver put their hands on their daughter’s stomach, entwining their fingers and as Felicity closed her eyes, she knew Oliver was right. They were going to create so many more memories and the ones they had already, they were going to take with them.

 

* * *

 

 

Felicity stood in the middle of the living room, looking around and trying to get into her head that this was probably the last time she was ever going to stand here.

The room was still full of their furniture. The family that had bought their house had taken over most of it. The only things missing were their personal things like Emmy’s toy on the couch or their photos on the mantelshelf.

She didn’t hear Oliver entering the room, but she sensed his appearance nonetheless. Goose bumps spread over her back, knowing that he was watching her.

“I doesn’t even feel like moving out,” she said, turning around to see Oliver leaning in the frame of the door. Sighing, she approached him and slid her arms around his middle, pressing the side of her face to the skin right above his heart.

“My offer is still on the table,” Oliver whispered, kissing the top of her head. “We can stay here.”

“No,” Felicity sighed. “No, after all the work you’ve put into it and all the help we got to make it a real home, I guess-”

“None of that is important if you aren’t happy,” Oliver responded, framing her face with his hands to make her look at him. “Do you want to stay here?”

Oliver’s eyes were intense, and she could see that he meant it. One word and he was going to call off the whole plan of them moving to that new home.

Felicity straightened herself to get up on her toes and pressed a kiss to Oliver’s lips.

“I love you,” she told him. “And I will be happy, no matter where we live as long as you are there.”

“I’m always going to be there,” he told her and lowered his head to kiss her, but Felicity ducked her head and tugged at Oliver’s hand to get him to move.

“Come on, we don’t have time for sob stuff.”

“Sob stuff?”

“Yeah, you had your I’m-gonna-be-all-sappy-face.”

“I don’t have that kind of face!” Oliver complained, only making Felicity laugh, though.


	46. Drunken men

“Can’t you drive faster?” Felicity asked Laurel, leaning over to the driver’s side to glance at the speedometer.

“Felicity, I’m already driving faster than I am supposed to and just like I have said there probably isn’t even anything wrong. Dad likes to exaggerate when it comes to Oliver.”

Felicity could only hope that Laurel was right because after the short phone call Quentin had given Donna, Felicity wasn’t as sure about Oliver’s wellbeing as her friend seemed to be. According to Donna Quentin had said that Oliver was kind of out himself and if Oliver was out of himself, he usually hit things until his knuckles were bleeding and the blind rage in his heart was stilled as much as possible for that moment.

And everything because of… Yeah, well, because of what exactly?

Earlier this evening Felicity and Oliver had hosted a dinner for their friends as a housewarming party. They had finally managed to fully settle in that beautiful house Oliver had built for their family. To celebrate that they had invited John and Lyla with little Sara, Roy and Thea, Laurel and of course Donna who had actually traveled from Las Vegas to join them and had brought her boyfriend Quentin Lance with her.

It still felt kind of weird that they were in a serious relationship to Felicity. She liked Quentin, and he was good to her mother, but with her living so far away it wasn’t really easy to get used to seeing them together.

Anyway, the dinner had been nice. They had had fun and having all her friends and her family around her had been great for Felicity. The only thing really disturbing the good mood had been the still tense relationship between Oliver and Quentin. It was almost impossible to be in a room with both of them together because as much as both men loved Donna and Felicity, they still couldn’t really stand each other.

Quentin hadn’t quite forgiven Oliver for what he had done to his family before he had returned to Starling City after the island, and Oliver wasn’t really delighted about Quentin’s relationship to his new mother and fourth most important woman in his life, Donna.

All of it had been carried to the extremes when Felicity had told the story about how Oliver had been so strange, and she had actually believed that he was cheating on her – something she had known deep in her heart he would never do to her – until he had shown her what he had been working on all the time and she had felt so guilty for having even the slightest doubt in his faithfulness. While everyone had laughed and had made funny comments, Quentin had leaned back with a grumpy expression in his face and had said dryly, “Well, taking in consideration your husband’s past actions I don’t think there is anything you should be feeling guilty of. Once an unfaithful manwhore, always an unfaithful manwhore, right?”

Felicity still swore, she had seen Oliver shooting arrows at Quentin in his mind. His fist had tightened around his fork and if she hadn’t put her hand on his wrist, he would have probably thrown the fork at the man across the table, ripping his carotid artery.

Nobody had dared to say a word until Donna had gotten up and decided that her boyfriend and her son-in-law obviously needed some kind of bonding time, so all women had left to have some drinks at Laurel’s place while they had left Roy and Diggle with the two wranglers.

She should have known that it wasn’t a good idea to leave the two of them alone. They normally behaved themselves when Felicity or Donna were around, but Donna had told Felicity that Quentin was having a bad week with a lot of work behind his desk and everything and he was just leaving it out on Oliver. Still Felicity had had a bad feeling about this.

As soon as the car stopped in front of her house, Felicity jumped out, shouting back at Laurel to please take Emmy with her. She opened the front door as fast as she could and almost ran into her living room.

It took some moments before she was about to really get what was happening right in front of her eyes.

Oliver was sitting on the couch, a photo of her in his arms. He held it pressed to his chest, only interrupting every once in a while to kiss the cold glass above her smiling face. Roy was half sitting, half lying on the other side of the couch with his mouth wide opened. John was sitting at their dining table, head propped up on one hand while he was yawning and his eyes were falling shut, no matter how much he tried to let them stay opened.

The only one who didn’t look like he had been dragged to hell and back or something like that was Quentin Lance who stood with his arms crossed in front of his chest and watched the three other men with a slight grin.

“What happened?” Felicity asked in a whisper while she approached him.

“Well, your guy thought it might be a good idea to take a drink to ease the tension. And one drink was followed by another and a third and so on. Roy passed out after the eighth I think. He was trying so hard to keep up to his great role model,” he said. Felicity ignored the ironic tone in his voice. “And John kept up a little more, but ever since I took away the alcohol because your guy was – like I said to your mother already – a little out of himself, he is on the edge to fall asleep.”

“He was out of himself?” Felicity asked, cocking her head to watch Oliver more closely. He looked so much at peace with himself that she couldn’t really picture him beating up stuff or even worse people.

“Well, isn’t that what we should call that?” Quentin asked, gesturing towards Oliver who was now kissing the photo again. “Big, grumpy guy kissing photos of his wife?”

“Trust me that is kind of how he is when he really is himself,” Felicity laughed a little too loud because Oliver’s head snapped towards her.

“F’lic’ty!” he exclaimed, putting the photo away carefully. He jumped over the backrest of the couch with a little less grace then he normally used to and approached her. The expression in his eyes was kind of blurry, but beneath it she could still see the loving look he always looked at her with. “My smart, lovely and oh so beautiful wife.”

Before Felicity could say anything, Oliver had slid his arms around her waist and was pulling her flush against him. His lips immediately found hers. Although he tasted like a lot of alcohol, the kiss was still near to perfect. Best thing about drunk Oliver was that he didn’t lose his ability to kiss like the greatest kisser in the whole world. While other guys used way too much tongue then and kisses became very wet and gross, Oliver still kissed her lovingly.

“What’s going on here?” she heard Laurel say and broke the kiss to look at her friend who was standing in the doorway, little Emmeline sitting on her hip and resting her head on her aunt’s shoulder.

“They are drunk,” Quentin explained.

“Did you have to let that happen?” Laurel asked her father with a roll of her eyes.

Quentin just gave a shrug with his shoulders. “At least he apologized for everything and-“

“Wow, what’s happening here?” Thea asked, entering the room, Donna and Lyla with Sara walking next to her following.

Since everyone except for Laurel had drunk alcohol on the girls' night, Laurel had been the only one allowed to drive. Thea, Donna and Lyla had waited for a taxi which had obviously arrived by now.

“Short version: they are all drunk and dad let it happen,” Laurel explained, shooting her father an angry look.

“Quentin,” Donna sighed, “you were supposed to…”

Felicity didn’t hear the rest of what her mother said. She was too distracted by how Oliver’s growing erection pressed into her hip when he pressed her even closer to him while his face sank deeper and deeper into her décolleté.

“Oliver, not here and not now,” she whispered, earning a grumble she didn’t understand.

“Okay, how about you get your guys home,” Laurel suggested towards Donna, Thea and Lyla. “And I take this little cupcake here home since her daddy is- Oh my God, Oliver, what the hell are you doing?!”

Felicity’s face and probably the whole rest of her body turned deeply red when everyone looked at them and especially at her husband’s hands that were trying to open the button of her jeans although she were trying to push his fingers away again and again.

“I want to make love to my beautiful, beautiful wife and create a dozen beautiful, beautiful babies with her tonight.”

“Okay, it’s time to go,” Thea said hastily, hurrying towards the couch to where Roy was still half asleep.

While Thea and Lyla did their best to get their men out of the dizzy state and somehow get them to leave with them, Donna talked to Quentin in what in case of Felicity talking that way was called her loud voice even if Donna was only whispering. It was funny, Felicity thought, how much Quentin shrank in his height the more Donna talked to him. It reminded her a lot of Oliver and her. Laurel was meanwhile going upstairs to pack a small bag of things Emmy was going to need for the night.

Felicity couldn’t say how long it took her friends to get their boyfriend or husband to move. Roy had his eyes still closed and barely stood on his own feet, instead leaning almost fully on his girlfriend when they left. There were no goodbye hugs or anything since Oliver was holding Felicity so tightly to his body that she wasn’t able to move at all.

“Come on, my big teddy bear, I’ll put you to bed,” Felicity sighed, rubbing his back comfortingly like you did for a crying baby.

“How about I’ll take you to bed?” Oliver answered with a slight lull in his voice.

Before Felicity could do as much as blink, Oliver had already lifted her and thrown her over his shoulder with his arm holding her behind the back of her knees. Hastily Felicity put her arms around his torso, holding onto him for dear life because thanks to the alcohol Oliver wasn’t exactly walking securely. He more of stumbled towards the stairs.

“Oliver, let me down!” Felicity screeched when Oliver tumbled two steps to the right, hitting the wall with his shoulder and turning that fast – “L’c’ty, since when is there a wall?” – that barely an inch was missing until her head would have bumped against the banister.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Oliver said and according to the movement through all her body, she suggested that he was shaking his head wildly. “I carry my wife to bed.”

He started his way up the stairs, no matter how often Felicity begged him to let her down. Half the way upstairs he actually slapped her ass, lulling something that sounded like, “I’ll go upstairs, banging my wife now.”

“Really? Minutes ago you talked about making love to me,” Felicity murmured, releasing a sigh of relief when Oliver finally approached upstairs and the dangerous part of their way to the bed was behind them.

Oliver headed towards their bedroom immediately and let her down on the mattress, so her body bobbed up and down on the bed before his body covered hers, his shirt already off of him. He put his whole bodyweight on her and ducked his head to the side of her neck, kissing, biting and licking her skin in a way that almost made her forget that he was drunk and she was supposed to be a good wife and responsible adult and not let anything happen her.

Usually she was the one desperately wanting sex when drunk. Oliver was more the come-here-and-let-me-cuddle-you-forever-guy when he was drunk. At least that was how he was usually. Today he seemed to be more like her because while Felicity was trying to figure out what to say to make him stop which was more than difficult since she didn’t really want him to stop, Oliver was lying on top of her, still kissing the side of her neck while fumbling to get off her blouse.

How the hell did he always get her to stop when she was lying on top of him almost completely naked and trying to get him to sleep with her?

“Oliver, we shouldn’t do this,” she finally managed to say, her voice sounding not as strong as she had wished, but how was she supposed to sound strong-minded when her sexy husband was biting on her earlobe and his naked chest was pressed to hers?

Oliver didn’t stop kissing her, just murmured something against the juncture of her neck and shoulder and let his lips travel down to her collarbone.

“Oliver, honey, you are drunk, very drunk actually, so we shouldn’t do this. It wouldn’t be reasonable if I did this because I am nearly sober and-”

Hastily Oliver lifted his head from her skin and pulled her arms from his body, putting them next to her head on the pillow.

“You will just lie here and enjoy this while I will do all the work, so you can’t be blamed for anything.”

Felicity laughed at his comment. Oliver could be very ingenious when it came to sex and that indeed sounded like something he would even say if he was sober.

“Come on, Oliver, if I let this happen it will totally be my fault.”

“No, it won’t.”

“Yes, it will.”

Oliver groaned against her collarbone. Slowly he opened the first buttons of her blouse, his lips immediately exploring the newly exposed skin.

She needed to think about something better to say.

Telling him that he wouldn’t enjoy this as much tonight as he would tomorrow wasn’t going to do it because Felicity knew he was just going to say that all he wanted was for her to enjoy it and since she was sober, she would.

Using Emmeline as an excuse wasn’t going to work either because Emmy was with Laurel.

Felicity bit down on her tongue when Oliver started rubbing his erection against her. She didn’t want to lose focus, and she would if she was going to give into his caressing for a second.

“Oliver, really, we can’t do this,” Felicity repeated after a while, finally thinking about something good to say. “I am very tired, and I want to sleep, so how about we will make this be the first thing to do in the morning?”

Last time she had been drunk he has suggested something like that, but she had refused, knowing that she had been going to have a hangover which she indeed had had. But Oliver never had a hangover. He was drunk, slept a few hours and woke up all happy and fresh.

Oliver lifted his face from her skin once more. He propped his head up onto his hand and looked at her with puckered lips.

“You’re tired?” he asked.

Felicity nodded. Yup, that was totally going to make him stop because Oliver was exactly the kind of guy that was very attentive of her feelings and moods. And even if she needed to tell him how she was when he was drunk and he didn’t just read it in her face, he still acted on her feelings.

Best husband ever!

“No sex tonight?” he asked.

“No sex tonight,” Felicity replied and nodded, caressing his cheek with her hand. “But tomorrow, I promise.”

“Hm…” Oliver hummed, sliding one finger down the side of her neck and along the valley between her breasts before he sighed and nodded. “Can we cuddle?”

Laughing, Felicity nodded and opened her arms for him to lie down on top of her, so he could embrace him in her arms which Oliver did immediately. He put his head to her chest, right above her heart and slid his arms around her tiny body, bringing them as close together as possible.

“Okay, not that tightly please,” Felicity hissed when Oliver tightened his hold around her even more, making it hard to breathe. At her words he loosened his hold on her slightly, still holding her with more strength than usually, but making it bearable. Actually it felt really good. Felicity liked being held tightly by him, his weight resting on her body comfortingly.

While he snuggled his nose up to her chest, breathing in the scent of her skin, Felicity rubbed his back, feeling the muscles and scars beneath her fingertips. She could feel his weight pressing down on her more and more as he slowly feel to sleep. Smiling, she massaged the back of his head.

She was almost asleep as well when she felt his lips move against her chest, his breath ghosting over her half naked chest. She had actually forgotten that she was still wearing her clothes, but she couldn’t care less.

“Hm?” she asked, knowing that his murmur had been her name.

“First thing in the morning. I won’t forget.”

And he didn’t forget which was why Felicity awoke to Oliver’s soft lips on her neck and his rough hands all over her body. So of course she kept her promise and let sex be the first thing in the morning.


	47. The fear of losing you

“Where’s Felicity?” Thea asked as soon as she opened the door for her brother.

“Nice to see you, too, Speedy,” Oliver answered with a roll of his eyes, stepping forward to press a kiss to his sister’s hair and entering the apartment she shared with her boyfriend.

While he took a look around like he always did when he entered a room, his sister closed the door behind him, crossing her arms in front of her chest before she repeated, “Ollie, don’t get me wrong, but you were more invited as an addition because you’ve been annoying Felicity and me until I said you could join your three favorite ladies at our sisters’ night.”

“Neither is Emmy your sister nor is she Felicity’s and yet she was invited,” Oliver replied, turning around to look at Thea. “So why exactly was it a big deal to invite me, too?”

“Because you are a guy,” Thea explained, rolling her eyes like he had before, “and because Roy is visiting his aunt for a few days and I have the place all to myself and I wanted to spend it with my sister and my niece, talking about sex, lingerie and other girls' things.”

“The sex is creative, the lingerie hot and-“

“Okay, honestly where the hell is Felicity?”

“Not coming,” Oliver answered with a sigh, sitting down on the backrest of Thea’s couch. “Emmy has sleeping problems. Last night she woke up and cried for three hours in a row and we didn’t get her to stop. We were actually discussing to take her to the hospital because with all her crying she barley breathed. So Felicity suggested it was best to stay home, but since you and me didn’t have a siblings’ night in like forever, I decided to come here on my own.”

“Why didn’t you stay with Emmy and let Felicity come here?”

“You know mama bear,” Oliver laughed. “She’s not-“

He was interrupted by the ringing of his mobile. Pulling it out of the pocket of his jeans, he glanced at the display and immediately smiled at the view of his favorite woman’s name appearing there.

“Felicity, my dear, miss me already?”

“Oliver?” she answered in a whisper, sounding slightly panicked. “I think there is someone in the house.”

Immediately Oliver tensed. His heartbeat fastened and his hands started shaking slightly. Felicity and Emmeline were all alone in their new house that was on the other side of the city. No matter how fast he would drive on his motorcycle, he would need at least fifteen minutes.

But how could anyone have come in? The house was secured very well. Diggle and he had taken care of that and when he had left to come here, he had switched on the alarm system. Had Felicity switched it off to open the door to the terrace and air the room since it was a little sticky tonight? Or had he forgotten to switch it on?

How much could happen in fifteen minutes? They could both be abducted, taken to the next airport and out of the country. Felicity could be beaten up, drugged and raped. Both of them could be tortured and killed. A thousand more horror scenarios ran through his mind before Felicity’s urgent voice was heard again.

“I already called the police, but they don’t have enough officers in the field right now and - Oliver, you need to come home. Now.”

“Where are you now?” Oliver asked urgently, already making his way to the door, tugging at his sister’s hand for her to come with him.

“I’m in the nursery with Emmy. I was just putting her to bed when-“

“You stay there and keep the door locked. Thea and I are on our way,” he said with clenched jaw and tried very hard not to break the cell phone in his hand. “Just- just hold on please.”

Oliver hung up before Felicity could respond anything. In case anything went wrong, he wasn’t fast enough or whatever else could go wrong, he didn’t want the last words she had said to him be a goodbye that would always tell him that she had known that he was going to fail her, fail them.

“What’s wrong?” Thea asked, running down the stairs behind her brother. “What did Felicity say?”

“Someone has broken into our house and she’s alone with Emmy. The police will take too long,” he answered, opening the door and sprinting to his motorcycle already. “We need to get to her as fast as possible.”

Thea didn’t ask any further questions, knowing that her brother was too far gone in his scenarios and his need to be with his wife and his daughter to talk to her. So she just put on the helmet he had thrown in her direction and sat down on his motorcycle behind him, her arms wrapped around his torso where she could feel his heart beat rapidly.

While Oliver rushed through the city to get to his loved ones, he tried to not lose himself completely by replacing the horrible images in his head with great memories he had collected over the more than 16 months of being Emmeline’s father and almost 26 months of being Felicity’s husband.

He remembered the moment when she had come into Thea’s townhome, telling him that she had enough of his self-sacrificing and he had to be with her. It had been the start of their relationship.  
He remembered his first proposal while they had had sex and his happiness when she had said yes and even his happiness when he has proposed for a second time the way he had planned with their friends.  
He remembered the day she had walked down the aisle and they had spoken their vows.  
He remembered the day she had told him that she was pregnant and the nine months of excitement after that.  
He remembered every little thing about their daughter – her first cry, her first smile, her first word, her first step, the first time she had snuggled into his chest.  
He remembered everything about them.

Oliver couldn’t lose them. He just couldn’t.  
Felicity had brought back happiness and love into his life. He finally had a life again. He wasn’t just the Arrow, the masked vigilante who saved the city. He was Oliver Queen, a loving husband and father.  
If he lost them, he didn’t think there was any way back to light again. She was his light.

And all of this was probably his fault. He had brought darkness into her life. He had endangered her and their daughter by keeping them close when it would have been the best to-

Hastily he shook his head. Felicity had stated more than once that she wasn’t going to let him off the hook and that she had chosen the life at his side and he didn’t have the right to take that away from her. So he wouldn’t question that if he was going to be able to save them and he wouldn’t question it if he wasn’t. Felicity was a grown-up adult and a strong, independent woman. She made her own choices and she had chosen him and their life and their family.

Still, the aching pain in his heart stayed. He knew that if they weren’t fast enough, he would fall back into the same black hole he had been in when he had returned from the island, only this time he would fall even deeper and he wouldn’t find a way out. There would be no light without Felicity and Emmeline.

As soon as they arrived at their driveway, he jumped from his motorcycle, not caring enough to wait until it stopped and he also didn’t wait to look whether his sister was following him before he was running towards the opened door, stepping into the almost dark house he had built to grow old in with Felicity and their kids.

Holding his breath, he stayed in the entry for two seconds, listening for any sounds that could ease his heart and tell him that Felicity and Emmeline were fine and that he hadn’t failed them. His heart sank when he didn’t hear anything and for a short moment Oliver thought he had lost them and he had failed them.

Until a dull sound was heard upstairs and he sprinted there, hoping he would be fast enough to be able to save Felicity. Even the thought of anyone just so much as breathing on her made him go wild, so when he reached the upper end of the stairs, he was in full fighting mode, ready to break the neck of whoever had dared to break into the place he had built to live a peaceful life with his family.

The more surprised he was when he found that Felicity had hooked her shoulder under the arm of the attacker, her feet strong on the floor, and with a simple but powerful move she threw the man who wasn’t just taller but also much more muscular and heavier than her over her back, so he landed on the floor. Before he was able to do so much as get up which he was obviously attempting to do, Felicity had already punched him right in the face.

Oliver watched as she proudly looked down on the unconscious man on the floor and immediately he matched his face to hers, feeling proud for what she had done.

“Felicity,” he whispered when she didn’t seem to notice him and her head snapped up towards him, her eyes filled with fear for just a short moment before she realized it was him and smiled in relief.

Smiling back at her proudly, Oliver opened his arms for her and she only hesitated for a second before she jumped over the knocked out man to her feet and right into his arms, closing her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips. Pressing her cheek to his she half cried and half laughed, “I made it.”

“You made it,” Oliver repeated, more laughing than crying, before he kissed her neck and hugged her more tightly against his chest and breathed her in, reassuring himself that she was okay and safe. “I was so scared.”

“I had a good trainer, I guess,” Felicity laughed, kissing his cheek until she reached his mouth and their lips met in a bruising kiss.

It wasn’t until her words that Oliver remembered why Felicity knew those moves. He had taught her how to defend herself from attackers because she had asked him to and even if he hadn’t been too excited about it, he was more than happy that she had insisted on that now. It had probably saved her life.

He lingered on her lips as if they were water and he was a drowning man. Oliver needed to feel her right now, needed to assure him that she was there and her that he was with her, that she was safe.

“Guys!”

Ar the shout of his sister Oliver parted his lips from Felicity’s, but kept their foreheads pressed together.

“You okay?” Oliver yelled back, remembering that he had let go off the motorcycle before it had come to a stand.

“I’m great. The two that have been trying to find something to steal down here not so much,” she added after a short moment. “Police is almost here, so better don’t get into something you don’t want strangers to see up there.”

Felicity chuckled lowly, snuggling her face into the crook of his neck.

“Is Felicity okay?” Thea asked.

“She’s fine,” Oliver replied the same moment Felicity answered, “I’m okay.”

Thea said something more, he didn’t really listen to. Instead he leaned his head against Felicity’s and whispered, “Where’s Emmy?”

“Sleeping,” she groaned her answer. “She refused to fall asleep all the time, but as soon as I said there might be someone in the house, she drifted off into sleep and slept through all the excitement.”

“Let’s go to her,” Oliver suggested, carrying Felicity to the nursery where he could watch his daughter sleep peacefully.

It was probably going to take some time before he was going to be over what had happened this night. The fear of losing Felicity or Emmeline was always there, but usually he could keep it from turning up on the surface. Whenever it did, he needed some time to gain control over it again, but Felicity always helped him. She was his shining light, reminding him that he needed to have the people he loved close to him.

Besides, now he knew that Felicity was capable of holding herself against attackers, at least when they were little thieves.

And god damn, she was hot doing so!


	48. Pool Time

“Come on, Emmy, you have to hold still if you want to get this over with,” Felicity explained with a sigh, trying to keep Emmeline from moving too much while she was applying sunscreen to her daughter’s skin. “Emmy, you really have to hold still.”

Her 17 month old daughter was wailing in displeasure as Felicity had to tighten her grip on her arm since the little girl was about to just walk out into the blazing sun. Ever since Felicity had gotten Emmy’s swimsuit out of her closet, the girl was all excited. She loved swimming time and since Starling City suffered from a heat wave and they had their own pool in the garden behind their new house, swimming had become a daily activity her daughter could barely await to start.  
Yes, baby Emmy loved swimming, but having her mother applying the necessary sunscreen to her skin not so much.

When her daughter made a new sound of displeasure, Felicity looked up to see Oliver already swimming in the pool, making funny faces at their daughter.

“Oliver, stop encouraging her to come outside before I am finished applying the sunscreen,” Felicity said with a grumpy look in his direction, “or I swear to God there will be no pool time for both of you today.”

Oliver just laughed at that, earning him another grumpy look from his wife.

Felicity was almost sure that if it was Oliver applying the sunscreen, Emmeline would be holding still. She was such a daddy’s girl that she literally did everything her father told her. It wasn’t like she generally disobeyed or ignored her mother, but Felicity had the feeling that her daughter was following her father’s requests with more heart.

“Okay, sunscreen is applied,” Felicity said with a sigh.

Putting the bottle away, she turned around to grab the floaties from the table. Unfortunately they were lying on the other side of it so Felicity had to let go of Emmeline’s arm to reach them. The moment her fingers had left her daughter’s skin, she regretted it because she could hear the slapping sounds of her daughter’s naked, little feet on the tiles.

“Emmy, we need to put on your floaties before-“

Turning back around, Felicity sighed and let the sentence unfinished. Emmeline was already on the edge of the pool, anyway, looking at her dad who had his arms spread widely for her to just jump in. And Emmeline, being the little daddy’s girl that she was, bent her knees. Wiggling with her little butt she readied herself before she jumped forward right into the cool water and into her father’s arms.

“That is my little girl!” Oliver stated proudly, kissing his daughter’s cheek. “So fearless!”

Rolling her eyes and sighing once more, Felicity got up from the couch and walked out to join her husband and her daughter at the pool.

“Here,” she said, throwing the floaties into the water. “I have applied the sunscreen, so you can manage to get her to wear those.”

Oliver made an unhappy face. He knew as good as Felicity that Emmeline hated to wear floaties, but since she couldn’t swim on her own yet, she needed them. Oliver holding her all the time wasn’t an option because the little girl was way too much into her independency to let her daddy hold her all the time. So the floaties were necessary.

Being his daughter’s favorite, Emmeline held completely still while Oliver tucked her little arms through the floaties. As soon as he was finished, Emmy smiled at him happily and then wiggled out of his arms to let herself float on the water, kicking her legs every once in a while to change the direction.

“Why doesn’t she-“

Putting it off with a waving gesture, Felicity took off her shirt and threw it on the floor, leaving her in a red bikini. Immediately her eyes met Oliver’s that were roaming all over her body, taking in the naked skin. She didn’t miss the hungry expression that took place in them.

“Don’t even think about it, Oliver,” Felicity said in a warning tone, sitting down on the edge of the pool before sliding into the cool water. A content sigh escaped her lips and she let her head fall back so the water could wash away the sweat that had clung the hair at the back of her neck to her skin. “It’s too hot to even think about sex.”

Chuckling Oliver swam towards her. While his arms closed around her waist, he pressed a soft kiss to the juncture of her shoulders and neck.

“God, Oliver, go away,” she grumbled, her arms sliding around his shoulders and her legs around his hips nonetheless. “Your skin is too hot. Go away.”

Sighing she let her head fall to his shoulder and enjoyed how they just floated through the water. She kept an eye on Emmeline the whole time. Felicity knew her daughter well enough to know that she sometimes just started to take off the floaties, becoming a little too confident in her swimming skills.

“I’m tired,” Felicity murmured against his skin.

Again Oliver chuckled, his hands stroking up and down her back. She could feel his naked abs press against her stomach and suddenly wasn’t sure whether the heat came from the air or from her inside anymore.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Felicity said hastily. Loosening the grip on Oliver’s body, she moved away until they weren’t touching anymore and she was all surrounded by the cool water. “No more cuddling until the heat wave is over.”

“Really?” he asked, perking his eyebrow. “No cuddling until the heat wave is over?”

“That is exactly what I just said. It’s too hot for… that,” Felicity explained, gesturing between Oliver and her.

Cocking his head, Oliver smirked at her. She knew exactly what that look meant. It was the same smug look he had given her when she had stated that he was never going to get her out of that really nice dress with the tricky back closure without ripping it in two.  
Oliver took challenges like that really seriously and he never gave up once he had taken one up.

“I bet I can-“

“Daddy!” Emmeline shouted before Oliver could suggest any bet, calling her parents attention.

“Hear that?” Felicity asked, pointing towards their daughter. That child could only be loved for her timing. “She’s demanding attention. Be a good parent and play with her.”

Thank God, Oliver just couldn’t say no to Emmy. Although Felicity noticed that his eyes lingered on her face for a little moment too long to be normal, he turned around and spread his arms, hugging Emmy to his chest. Felicity was quite sure that this challenge wasn’t off the table and Oliver was soon going to focus back on her, but for now she had him distracted.

Slowly she swam towards them, but stayed in what she assumed was a safe distance for Oliver not to get into mischief.

“Daddy, dive!” Emmeline repeated again, already working on getting her floaties off.

Diving was one of Emmy’s favorite things to do in the water. When they had been going to the baby swim group and the woman, who had led the group, had suggested that they should let their baby dive, Oliver had almost had a heart attack. It had taken a lot until Felicity had managed to calm him down and keep him from going straight for that woman’s throat. She had to explain the whole diving reflex to him until he had allowed to let the diving happen.

Now Emmy loved to dive.

“How about you have fun with our daughter and I will go inside and get us something to drink and a little snack?” Felicity suggested.

“Sure,” Oliver replied with a nod of his head, helping Emmeline to get off the floaties.

Felicity closed the distance between herself and her loved ones, pressing a short kiss to her daughter’s hair and a slightly longer kiss to Oliver’s lips, before she said, “Have fun, you two.”

“Oh, and as soon as Emmy’s asleep,” Oliver whispered into her ear, sliding one arm around her waist to keep her close, “we will work on that challenge again.”

“I can hardly wait,” Felicity grumbled ironically. Still had to bite her tongue to not let him see the smile that was threatening to spread all over her face, but Oliver wouldn’t have seen it anyway because he was already under water, diving with his little sunshine.

If Oliver was distracted all day, he was only more eager at night to meet his challenge. So tonight was surely going to be a lot of fun.


	49. Half-Birthday

Oliver was tired. He had been stuck in his stuffy office all day, snowed under with work. There hadn’t even been enough time for him to call Felicity and Emmeline as he usually did at lunch. Instead he had called some business partner to talk about recent plans on a joint project. Talking with his loved ones was so much more fun for several reasons.

Working in an office all day was so much more exhausting than his usual nighttime job. Putting on the suit and running through the city to catch the bad ones wasn’t as exhausting as being CEO of a company. It had been so much more fun when Felicity had worked there, too. He missed watching her through the glass walls all day long.

Now all he wanted to do was get Emmeline and Felicity and take both of them with him to bed, so he could fall asleep with his wife snuggled to his side and his daughter resting on his chest. Enjoying some family time was exactly what he needed after a day like that. Roy and John were on duty tonight, so as long as there wasn’t any extreme emergency calling him in, he could just stay home and spend time with the two most important people in his life.

He had barely opened the door when he heard loud laughter coming from the living room. It seemed like they had at least one visitor, something he really wasn’t in the right mood for tonight. All he wanted was to change into more comfortable clothes and cuddle. Yes, he was a sap like that and he wasn’t too proud to admit it.

Sighing, he put his briefcase away and took off his suit jacket, carelessly throwing it onto the stairs. On his way towards the living room he rolled up his sleeves and opened the topmost button of his dress shirt. Maybe if Felicity saw a little more of his naked skin, she would agree that tonight just wasn’t the right time for visitors. There were just so many better things they could do.

Before Oliver had made it to the living room, though, the door opened and little Sara was stepping out, her arms crossed in front of her chest and a deep frown in her cute, little face. It made Oliver smile immediately and he got down on his knees, leveling his face with hers.

“Hi, my little darling,” he said, smiling at her. “Are you here for a sleepover?”

“No, we have girls’ night, so you need to go,” she stated firmly, narrowing her eyes in a way Oliver knew way too well from his wife. “You are not allowed to come in.”

Oliver pursed his lips, hoping a little pouting was going to persuade his little goddaughter, but she stayed standing in the door frame, her death glare pointed towards him. She had obviously been told to be very strict with him.

“Hm…” Oliver hummed, nodding to himself while slowly straightening up again. “Well, if you’re saying I can’t go in, I will have to-“

He quickly grabbed little Sara and slung her over his shoulder. She giggled amusedly, nevertheless wriggling like crazy to get away, but Oliver held her securely to his body with an arm behind the back of her knees. His other hand held the hem of his goddaughter’s dress so her nice, little butt wasn’t going to be exposed.

When he stepped into the living room, five pair of eyes focused on him. Lyla sat in one of the armchairs with a photo album on her thighs while Thea sat on the armrest and leaned over to point at a photo. Meanwhile, Felicity sat on the couch with Emmeline on her lap, Laurel right next to both of them, feeding Emmy cake.

“Damn it, we were sending our best fighter out there,” Thea groaned. “Sara, you were supposed to stop him from coming in.”

“He’s too strong!” Sara screeched, laughing. “Uncle Ollie, let me down!”

Oliver bent down and let Sara back to the floor. Immediately she grabbed a party head from the couch table and ran towards Laurel and Felicity, taking the spoon from Laurel to continue feeding Emmy for her.

Only now he noticed that all of them were wearing party heads and next to a birthday cake on the table was a half-empty bottle of champagne. Torn wrapping paper lay scattered on the ground.

“Okay, will someone tell me what’s going on here? I am pretty sure that I didn’t miss any of your birthdays, but there is still a birthday cake on our couch table and all of you are wearing party heads, so if I miss something, please tell me.”

“It’s Emmy’s birthday,” Sara replied.

Oliver cocked his head. If he was a less attentive father, he would probably panic now, believing that he had indeed forgotten his daughter’s birthday. But fact was that Oliver wasn’t that kind of dad. No matter how much he had worked lately, he just wouldn’t forget his daughter’s birthday. Besides, since her birthday was on Valentine’s Day, he could hardly miss it. The media celebrated that day like a second Christmas. So no, today wasn’t her birthday.

“Sara, Emmy’s birthday is in February,” he explained, shaking his head while simultaneously making eye contact with his wife. “Are you guys celebrating a pregnancy test party again?”

“Yeah, because we always drink champagne when we think we are pregnant,” Thea answered, rolling her eyes.

“We are celebrating Emmy’s half-birthday,” Felicity finally revealed with a shrug of her shoulders.

“Her half-birthday?” Oliver asked, perking his eyebrows.

“Yes, Emmy is exactly 18 months old today,” Lyla said with a nod. “We’ve celebrated that with Sara, too.”

“No, you didn’t,” Oliver disagreed, shaking his head.

“Of course they did,” Laurel tried to help out. “We’ve all been invited.”

“And there was cake,” Thea said.

“And champagne,” Felicity added, hastily downing the last sip of her champagne.

Oliver cocked his head even more, looking at one woman after the other. Felicity was busying herself with the empty glass, Laurel played with Saras hair and Thea and Lyla were focused on the photo album again.

“You needed an excuse to eat cake and drink champagne, right?”

The four women exchanged guilty gazes. Of course all of this was just an excuse to spend a girls’ night in the middle of the week.

“We don’t need excuses for anything,” Thea insisted. “We are young, healthy, not-pregnant women. We can eat cake and drink champagne whenever we like. And now go, this is a girls’ night.”

“But if this is my daughter’s half-birthday, shouldn’t I be invited to the party then?” he asked.

He couldn’t even say why, but something about this conversation was just funny. Maybe it was the fact that they were still trying to make it look like they were celebrating a not even really existing special occasion, acting so innocently. As if he was going to say anything about their little party in the middle of the week! Thea was right. They didn’t need an excuse for anything. Still they used that occasion as an excuse.

“Ollie, did you want your parents around at your birthday?”

“No, but then why’s Felicity here?”

Felicity hugged Emmeline a little closer to her chest and immediately the little girl wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck and nuzzled her nose, giggling happily.

“God, Ollie, just go away!” Thea finally burst out, making a gesture to shoo him away.

“Speedy, this is still my home and as long as Emmy doesn’t-“

“Bye-bye,” Emmeline interrupter him. Oliver turned his gaze towards his daughter, who was now giggling at him while slapping her tiny hands in front of her eyes and leaning back to her mother’s chest.

“Well, looks like Baby Emmy agrees with us,” Lyla said, hastily putting a fork of cake into her mouth when Oliver’s angry eyes met her.

“Come on, I’ll accompany you to the door,” Felicity suggested with a smile, knowing that her husband just couldn’t cope with being rejected by his daughter, no matter how meaningless it was. So she gave Emmeline to Laurel and got up. She reached out her arms and put her hands around Oliver’s bicep, leading him to the door.

“Don’t make a detour through the bedroom!” Thea called after them.

Oliver opened his mouth to reply, but Felicity lightly slapped his chest before he could have made any sound. Hastily she hissed, “Oliver, there are children present.”

He mumbled something she couldn’t understand, so she just laughed quietly and rested her head on his shoulder while they made their way to the entrance door.

“So…” Felicity started, turning around towards him, so they were chest to chest, and slid her arms around his neck. “Where are you going to spend your evening?”

“Well, after my own daughter basically kicked me out of my own home…”

“Oh, my poor baby!” Felicity said, framing his face with her hands. Smiling, she got up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his. It was supposed to be a short, gentle kiss to comfort him, but as soon as their lips had made contact, Oliver’s arms tightened around her and he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss.

Felicity pressed herself closer to Oliver’s chest, massaging his tongue with hers. Her fingertips played with the hair at the back of his neck. They had had a lot of sex lately. After that terrible heat wave had ended, they had worked on making up for all the sex they had missed before. So why exactly couldn’t they make a detour through the bedroom now?

“Hey, when I said you were not allowed to disappear into your bedroom, I meant you were not supposed to have sex right now at all,” Thea explained, standing in the door frame to the living room. “Ollie, go away now! You will survive one evening without them.”

“Just one more moment,” Felicity asked, turning her head towards Thea, giving Oliver perfect access to attack her neck with his lips. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Otherwise I’ll come and get you,” her sister-in-law warned, but nonetheless returned to the living room and closed the door behind her.

“Okay, so where are you going to spend the evening?”

“Foundry,” Oliver murmured against her neck. “I’ll busy myself with beating up some of the bad guys and come home when you’ll text me that the coast is clear, so we can pick up where we just had to stop.”

“You mean we will pick up with what you have planed to initiate with opening the topmost button of your dress shirt?” she asked, cocking her head and laughing at the expression in his face. “Yes, I know exactly what you were trying to do with that.”

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her once more, slowly and gently this time. They were pulled apart when Sara stated, “Felicity, you have to come back. Now!”

When Felicity turned around, she saw little Sara standing in the door to the living room, her arms crossed in front of her chest. She tapped her foot on the floor impatiently. Lyla had sworn that Sara had picked that up from Felicity and nobody else.

“You’ve heard, Mr. Queen,” Felicity said, shortly pecking his lips, “my presence is requested.”

Oliver grumbled a little and wanted to lean forward to kiss Felicity one last time, but Sara was already tugging at Felicity’s hand, moving her towards the living room.

“Hey, Sara, married people are allowed to kiss each other goodbye,” Oliver complained.

“Aunt Thea said I shall bring her back now,” Sara explained.

“Well, when Aunt Thea said so,” Felicity said with a shrug of her shoulders before she turned around to air-kiss Oliver and disappeared into the living room.

It seemed like enjoying some family times wasn’t going to happen that soon, Oliver thought with a sigh. But he knew that he had no chance of a comfortable evening as long as his sister was there, holding his wife and his daughter captive.

So he just sighed once again, turned around and left. On his way to the car he called John, who took the call, saying, “Kicked out of your home, I guess?”

“Yes.”

“City seems quiet tonight,” John answered. “Shall I buy you a beer?”

“It’s the least I expect after your daughter just kicked me out of my own home.”

Laughing, both of them hung up. If the ladies wanted to spend a girls’ night, then Diggle and Oliver could clearly do the same.

And as soon as he would come home, he would spend the rest of the night holding his family, just like he had planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kasey did another great gifset: 
> 
> http://myshipperlife.tumblr.com/post/142482036850/time-for-a-story-half-birthday-scene-from-time


	50. Finding comfort in you

Felicity’s heart was racing, and her whole body trembled slightly. She tried to take some deep breaths to calm herself, but it didn’t work. Smiling bravely, she hoped Emmeline didn’t notice her nervousness because as hundreds of websites said, if children felt her parents’ nervousness, then it was going to infect them. Nervousness was like a disease in cases like this.

None of it would be a problem if Oliver was here like had been supposed to in the first place. Of course it wasn’t his fault that he wasn’t here. Oliver would never ever purposely let her alone in a situation like this, but an important board meeting had come in between the plan of him joining his two most precious girls.

It was just a damn doctor’s appointment, Felicity tried to tell herself, but that didn’t work, either. How could it work if she knew in the back of her head that Emmeline was going to have vaccinations? She was going to have injections, so there were going to be syringes which had those pointy, little needles.

How was she supposed to stay calm at that?

When Emmy had been just a few weeks old and was supposed to have her first vaccinations, Felicity had sat down with Oliver and had talked to him about what she needed him to do whenever their daughter and any future kids were going to have vaccinations or anything similar. Since she had always been afraid of needles, he had to be the adult in those cases. She had known that Oliver had been about to freak out about Emmeline’s first vaccination because his little princess being hurt by a needle had not been something he had felt comfortable with. But as soon as she had pointed out that she couldn’t be the calm in this, he had been perfectly trying to be calm and to calm Emmeline down. And it had worked.

So Oliver not being here now was a really, really, really bad thing. Those were the first vaccinations Emmeline was going to have without her daddy being there to distract her. This was going to be a mess, Felicity was almost completely sure of that.

She knew what Oliver always did to comfort Emmy when there were needles or other supposedly painful things around. The first thing to do was playing with her favorite toy. Right now it was a pink plush elephant that Felicity of course had put into her bag before coming here. Then Oliver always sang some stupid song he invented only for her, clapping his hands while singing it and making funny faces. And right after the injection he gave her some candy. So of course Felicity had brought some chocolate with her as well.

Still, she felt like she was going to suck at distracting Emmeline. She was good at it under less serious, less worrying circumstances. The moment she was going to see the needles, though, she would just pass out or become all pale and stiff.

“Mrs. Queen?” the doctor’s receptionist asked, approaching her with a friendly smile. “Emmy’s the next one.”

Pressing her daughter a little more tightly to her chest, Felicity got up and followed the young woman into the treatment room where she sat back down in front of the desk, looking around at all the happy children smiling at her from posters. Was she the only one who did not find any comfort in that many eyes staring back at her?

How come she had never noticed those posters or rather how strange they were. The posters had always been there, but those eyes hadn’t always been so… staring.

“Mummy?”

Her daughter’s quiet voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and Felicity realized that Emmeline was looking at her with a frown she had clearly inherited by her father. She looked almost concerned which Felicity thought couldn’t be exactly possible at her young age of only a little more than a year and a half. Hastily Felicity smiled to not have Emmeline start crying before the doctor had even entered the room, but Emmy’s frown stayed.

 “Daddy coming?” Emmeline asked, cocking her head.

“No, daddy is working,” Felicity answered, smiling while running her fingers through her daughter’s blonde locks.

Sighing, Emmeline leaned her head forward until her cheek rested against her mother’s shoulder. She snuggled her face to the side of Felicity’s neck and sighed again. Her hand meanwhile ran up and down the other side of her mother’s neck. Felicity closed her eyes and let her daughter’s even breathing calm her down. She felt Emmeline’s regular heartbeat against her own chest and it wasn’t long until her heartbeat matched her daughter’s.

“Mrs. Queen,” Dr. Sanders interrupted the silence way too soon for Felicity’s liking, “I am sorry you had to wait. One of my younger patient’s did not get along with the syringes.”

“I have no idea why,” Felicity muttered under her breath, but gave the doctor a friendly smile.

“Hi, Emmy,” Dr. Sanders then greeted Emmeline. “Where did you leave your handsome daddy?”

“He’s working and couldn’t make it,” Felicity explained with a shrug of her shoulders.

Dr. Sanders gave her a soft smile and sat down behind her desk, looking at Emmeline’s file shortly before saying, “Three injections today. Well, that shouldn’t be a problem since Emmy is my favorite patient for syringes. I have barely ever met a child who is so quiet while having vaccinations at that young age.”

Felicity bit her tongue to stop herself from telling Dr. Sanders that today might be an exception from that rule.

“So, let’s get started,” Dr. Sanders suggested, pulling the bowl with the three syringes closer.

Felicity turned her chair around so Dr. Sanders had better access to Emmeline’s thigh where she was usually injected. Even if her baby fat was almost all gone by now, her thigh was still a little wobbly, so it was the perfect spot for injections.

“Look, Emmy, what I’ve got here,” Felicity said, trying to make her voice sound as calm as possible while she pulled the pink elephant out of her bag.

She tried to concentrate on waving the toy in front of Emmeline’s eyes, letting the tip of the trunk brush Emmeline’s nose to make her giggle, but she could see Dr. Sanders approaching from the corner of her eyes and it made her heartbeat fasten. The thought of seeing needles made her stomach cramp.

“Mummy!” Emmeline exclaimed laughing, taking the toy from Felicity’s hands to brush it against her mother’s face again and again.

This was not going to work to distract her, Felicity thought, thinking about a song to sing, but the knowledge of needles being right next to her was enough to make her brain shut down. It just refused to remember any song she usually sang for Emmy and she sang a lot of songs for or her with her lately. Even if Felicity was the one to actually sing the song, Emmy was doing her best to imitate her mother’s sounds. But those needles were distracting her from any of songs and the memories of mother-daughter-time. She couldn’t see the syringes, but she knew they were there.

“Mummy!” Emmeline exclaimed once more.

When Felicity focused her attention back on her daughter, the little girl let the toy drop to the floor and instead began to move her wrists in circles, chanting syllables that were probably supposed to be words nobody understood but her. It wasn’t until she sang “All day long” – okay, it sounded more like “Owl ay ol”, but Felicity had heard the same singsong often enough to know what it was supposed to mean – until she got what Emmeline was doing.

“Are you singing ‘The wheels on the bus’ for me?” she asked, cocking her head and Emmeline laughed before turning her wrists in circles once more and repeating her singing of “All day long”.

“That’s it,” Dr. Sanders stated before Felicity could even progress what just had happened here.

Felicity looked up in question. “You already injected her? All three times?”

Dr. Sanders laughed before she nodded and answered, “Yes, all three injections given without any crying. And that is why I love Emmy. She is so unproblematic. I have patients who even start crying before I come near them with the syringes.”

Wordlessly Felicity looked at Emmeline who smiled at her mother like she had just given her the biggest slice of cake she had ever gotten. Without looking away from her daughter’s face, Felicity reached into her bag and pulled out the piece of chocolate for Emmeline, but the girl only put her hand around her mother’s wrist and pushed her to eat the chocolate herself. As soon as Felicity’s lips made contact with the candy, Emmeline clapped her hands happily.

The next two minutes during which they said goodbye to Dr. Sanders, Felicity could barely take her eyes from her daughter. Had that little girl really done all the things Oliver usually did to calm her down to stop Felicity’s worries about the needles? She hadn’t even seen one single one of the syringes, and Emmeline hadn’t blinked an eye when she had been injected.

When they left the doctor’s office to head towards the car, Felicity’s phone rang. She let Emmeline down to the floor before picking up. “Hello?”

“Hey, has everything been going okay?” Oliver asked immediately. “I know how much you hate needles… and other pointy objects.”

“Yeah, well, I was distracted,” Felicity explained distantly, watching Emmeline wait at the car. “You know, our daughter imitated all of your usual comforting things. She offered me her toy, she sang me a song and I was allowed to eat chocolate.”

“That’s my little girl.”

“Well, we are going to go home now, and I will reward Emmy with a lot of ice cream.”

“Have fun,” Oliver responded, the smile audible in his voice. “I’ll be joining you as soon as I am finished here. It might take a few more hours, though.”

 “I cannot guarantee that there will still be ice cream when you come home.”

“Yeah, just rub salt in the wound, honey,” Oliver chuckled.

Felicity laughed, saying, “I gotta go. Ice cream is waiting for Emmy and me. I love you.”

“I love you, too. See you at home.”

Still smiling, Felicity put her phone to her bag and lifted Emmeline into her arms to put her in the car seat. But before she could open the door, Emmy tugged at a strand of her hair, demanding her mother’s attention.

“What’s up, sweetheart?”

“Luv you,” Emmeline repeated, once again tugging at her mother’s hair until Felicity ducked her head down, and Emmeline could press a short kiss to her mother’s lips.

“I love you, too, Emmy,” Felicity responded, smiling. Emmeline laughed, hiding her face behind her hands as if she was ashamed. Felicity pressed a short kiss to her daughter’s hair, asking, “How about we call daddy and tell him you’ve said those words to me first?”

Oliver was most certainly going to complain about this. Felicity was amused just by the thought of it. Since Emmy was usually more of a daddy’s girl, both of them had expected that their daughter was going to say those words to him first. God, she could tease him with that for the rest of their lives, Felicity thought with a big grin. She would probably start as soon as he was home.

Oh, that was going to be so much fun.


	51. Exciting night

“Okay, I have warned you at least five times before,” Thea explained, snapping Felicity’s phone from her fingers. “Now it’s enough.”

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked in horror when Thea switched the phone off and let it sink into her purse. “Thea, give it back! It’s not funny! What if something is wrong with Emmy and Oliver can’t reach me?”

“Emmeline is perfectly fine,” Thea said, rolling her eyes. “Besides, my brother knows where you are and that you are here with me, so he can still call me. Or John will come over and get you. Oh, and just to repeat this one more time, Emmeline is perfectly fine. You’re acting like you have left her alone with Ollie for the first time.”

Sighing, Felicity nodded. Thea was right. Emmeline was perfectly fine. She had had a slight cold last week, but it hadn’t been that bad. Well, and even if it had, Emmeline would have certainly favored her daddy to stay with her. So yes, Emmeline was perfectly fine. Unfortunately, Felicity felt like she had been infected with the illness. She hadn’t been feeling too great for the last few days which had been one of the many reasons for her to look forward to spending the night with Oliver on the couch. But then Thea had come by, and she had insisted on spending the night together in a new club she wanted to check out. So here they were in the middle of a dancing crowd with loud music and drunk people around them.

“I’ll go get us something to drink,” Thea suggested, probably realizing that they should as well get drunk, and gestured towards the bar to make sure Felicity understood the words despite the music.

“Something without alcohol for me please,” Felicity asked and Thea rolled her eyes, murmuring something Felicity couldn’t understand.

As soon as Thea had turned her back on her, Felicity reached into her purse to get hold of her phone, but soon remembered that Thea had taken it from her. How could she have taken her phone? Wasn’t that a criminal act? Didn’t that count as torture? Well, it should count as torture. All the photos of her little family were on that phone. Felicity needed those photos for whenever she had a short second to herself, so she could take a look at her husband and her daughter and feel at home even if they weren’t near her.

But Thea had been right to take the phone from her. Emmeline was perfectly fine with Oliver and she was supposed to spend the evening with her sister-in-law. So she was going to enjoy this night. She could still cuddle with Oliver when she was back tonight. He had been so busy lately that they hadn’t had much time with each other. The last evening they had spent together without any thoughts about work – Arrow or QC related – had been Diggle’s birthday more than three weeks ago and-

“A nonalcoholic cocktail for mama bear,” Thea interrupted her thoughts and gave her a glass with a green liquid that looked suspiciously alcoholic. So Felicity glanced at Thea over the rim of her glass.

“No alcohol. I swear,” Thea said. “I gave you alcohol against your will once and I paid for it during the next training. I don’t think Oliver has ever been that harsh before.”

Felicity hesitated for a long moment before she shrugged her shoulders and took a sip. She scrunched her nose immediately and shook her head.

“God, Thea, that is disgusting!”

“Really? I thought it should be something you like. Shall I get you something else?”

“No…” Felicity said, shaking her head. “I’ll drink this one, and hope the next one is better. Really, this tastes like pure chemicals. Anyway, let’s go dancing before that drink burns a hole into my stomach.

So they danced, and even though it took some time for Felicity to let go of her thoughts, she eventually started to relax and to really enjoy her girls’ night with Thea. They really did this way to rare, but it wasn’t easy finding nights to spend together with their extraordinary night jobs and little Emmy. So Felicity tried to make the best of the time they had together. She drank a few more drinks, but they were just as bad as the first one. That club obviously didn’t know how to mix drink. The taste of the nonalcoholic cocktails could count as bodily harm.

When the music suddenly stopped and the lights were switched on, Felicity frowned. She might have lost track on time, but she was highly sure that it wasn’t that late yet. Or did the club close earlier because they didn’t want to risk that someone was charging them because drinking more than five of their cocktails had caused them serious damage?

“What-“ Thea started to say, but was interrupted by a loud voice sounding through the several speakers.

“Starling City Police! The party is over! Please leave the club now and betake yourself to one of the ambulances outside. Please stay calm for your own safety. You will soon receive more information on what is happening.”

“I told you there was something wrong with the drinks,” Felicity mumbled towards Thea who only grinned a little drunkenly.

 

Time had been flying by it seemed. One moment Oliver had been interrupting his daughter’s half-birthday in August and now he was already counting down the days to Christmas every night he put Emmy to bed, laughing about her disappointment that they still weren’t down to only one night of sleep. Indeed, it were still 21 night to Christmas Eve, and when he had told her that a few hours ago Emmeline had narrowed her eyes and sworn that he had told that the last time already. The thought caused him to chuckle. She was so excited about Christmas, but she wasn’t the only one. Oliver had been working so much lately that Christmas seemed like the perfect opportunity to spend more time with his family again.

This time it was going to be a perfect Christmas. Last time had been nearly perfect already, but he had acted like a jerk in the weeks before because Emmeline had started to say “Dadda” randomly to every man that she had seen. The worst had been when she had said it to Palmer. Oliver knew it had been stupid and he knew that Emmeline hadn’t known what she had said, but it had still hurt him. This year it was going to be different. He was going to spend all of his free time to prove to his loved ones how much he loved them. He had actually planned a few things to make Felicity really happy for the last four weeks of this year. Well, he was planning on making her happy, for the rest of her life, but-

“The girls are finally asleep,” Diggle interrupted his thoughts. “You want a beer?”

“Beer sounds great,” Oliver answered with a nod of his head.

Diggle turned around to head to the kitchen and get them the drinks when Oliver’s phone started buzzing in the pocket of his jeans. Hastily he pulled it out, hoping to see Felicity’s name on the display. He tried to be not too disappointed when instead of his wife his mother-in-law’s boyfriend was calling.

“Captain,” Oliver said a little tightly.

He still didn’t get along with Lance too well. Both of them were trying to get along with each other because Oliver loved his mother-in-law and Quentin loved his girlfriend’s daughter and both of them knew that their relationships were going to suffer when they didn’t behave like adults around each other. A few months ago Quentin had had a bad day and things had gone very wrong between them, Oliver had gotten very drunk, and even though Quentin had apologized later, the relationship between them was still tense.

“Look, Queen, I know we have our issues,” the older man said, “but in times of crisis we have always managed to pull ourselves together.”

“What’s wrong?” Oliver asked immediately, earning him a questioning gaze from Diggle who had just returned from the kitchen, one beer in each hand.

“I’m not sure yet. This doesn’t mean anything has happened, but we got an anonymous hint that the barkeeper in that new club in the city is mixing drugs into drinks to run some field tests about their effects. We closed the club and sent a whole team of doctors and paramedics there. All the guests were taken to the hospital. I just received the list from one of my detectives who had been there. Thea’s and Felicity’s names are on it. I thought you should know.”

“They are in the hospital?” Oliver asked. His hold on his phone tightened. He got up from the couch and hurried to the door.

“Yes.”

“I’m on my way. Thank you,” Oliver managed to say between gritted teeth before he hung up and almost ran towards his car.

“Hey, what’s going on?” John asked from the door. “Are Felicity and Thea okay?”

“Not sure yet. Can Emmy stay here for the night?”

“Sure. Call me when you know more,” John asked and Oliver nodded before starting the engine of the car and speeding out of the driveway.

He knew what catastrophic consequences drugs could have. The Count had killed a lot of people to find the perfect mixture for his drug and even then the drug had been quite destructive. He remembered the pain he had been in when he had been drugged with Vertigo for the first time. He remembered realizing that what he was most afraid of was being himself. He remembered Laurel’s panic when she had seen Sara after she had been drugged.

Drugs were only getting worse, the effects more horrible with every new drug that was created. Oliver didn’t even want to think about what possible effects this one could have on two of the most important people in his life.

He jumped out of the car as soon as the wheels came to a stand. He rushed to the entrance where a young receptionist looked at him with wide eyes. He wasn’t quite sure if she was scared of him or as Felicity always stated just ‘totally in awe about the combination of that much muscle and the pretty face without even hearing that rough voice and the sexy mind that came with them’.

“Hi, I’m Oliver Queen. I was told that my sister and my wife have been taken to the hospital from a club.”

The woman nodded slightly, turning her eyes to the screen of her computer, but nonetheless throwing him a glance every once in a while. She typed something with the keyboard terribly slowly in comparison to what Oliver was used from Felicity, and Oliver had to stop himself from snapping at her to hurry. He knew Felicity would be going to lecture him about polite behavior later, so he kept his mouth shut and waited impatiently to get the information he needed.

“Room 423. Fourth floor and then to the right,” the woman finally said, gesturing towards the elevator.

Oliver ran to the elevator. He pushed the button to call the damn thing down from where it was on the sixth floor and then decided to take the stairs. He didn’t want to waste a second, so he ran upstairs until he was on the fourth floor and then took a look around.

The corridor was full of people. Some of them were sitting on the floor, sleeping with their heads resting on the shoulder of the person next to them. Others were pacing back and forth along the wall while three young adults were yelling at a doctor because they wanted to go home and didn’t need any medication or infusion or whatever just because they were a little drunk.

Oliver made a mental note to donate even more money to the hospital. Given the number of people in the corridor who didn’t seem to be moving into a room soon, Oliver assumed that the money he already had donated had saved Felicity and Thea from having to stay in a hallway for whatever the doctors were doing with the party guests here.

He refused to think that their state of health were too serious to let them stay in the hallway. He knew he couldn’t allow himself to think like that.

As soon as he found the room number the receptionist had told him he hurried towards the door, only stopping in front of it to take a deep breath. It took him a lot of strength to softly knock instead of hammering against the wooden door or just kick it in. His heart was racing.

“Come in,” Felicity’s melodious voice responded and he felt the corners of his lips twitch upwards and the feeling of a clenched fist around his throat ease slightly.

Taking in another deep breath, he opened the door and stepped into the small patient’s room. Felicity was sitting cross-legged on the bed at the window while Thea was lying in bed snoring softly and holding her purse in her arms like it was her most precious teddy.

“Hey,” he whispered lowly to not wake his sister up who looked like she was sleeping peacefully although her short hair was all over her face and was sucked into her mouth with every intake of breath.

“Hey,” Felicity replied, a smile spreading on her face. “How did you know we were here?”

“Lance called and told me,” Oliver whispered. He pressed a short kiss to the crown of Thea’s hair, adjusting the blanket around her body to make sure she was warm and tugging her hair behind her ear before he went around the bed and sat down next to Felicity, scrutinizing her face. “Are you okay?”

Smiling, Felicity leaned forward and kissed him gently. At the same tame she put one hand above his on her thigh and then nodded while saying, “Thea and I are fine. It’s more a routine to make sure we weren’t drugged. Thea was a little drunk, so she fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. They still don’t know a lot about the drug, so they don’t know what exactly to look for. The doctor said they want to keep everyone here during the night, but it looks like they didn’t test the drug yet. Who knows, maybe it was just a joke.”

“I don’t think the police would have made such a big deal out of this if they hadn’t believed what they have been told was true,” Oliver responded, giving her another close look. “Do you have any symptoms of drug use? Do you feel different? Dizzy or anything? Are you tired or hungry? Any hallucinations? Headache maybe?”

“I get a headache from your questions,” Felicity replied, patting his hand. “I am fine. Really.”

“Just wanted to make sure,” Oliver explained with a shrug of his shoulders, playing with Felicity’s hand. “I was worried. I wish you would have called me instead of letting Lance do it.”

He had his gaze lowered to their joined fingers. It wasn’t until Felicity’s free hand lifted his chin to make him look at her that he locked eyes with her. Oliver trusted Felicity’s judgment, and if she said that she wasn’t in any danger, then she wasn’t in any danger. It was as simple like that. Still, he would have liked her to call him and tell him. It would have spared him some of the panic he had felt when he had rushed here.

“I’m sorry,” she said, moving closer to him, so she was sitting in his lap. She slid her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips. “I’m really sorry. I would have called you, but Thea took my phone, and she has such a strong grip on her purse that I couldn’t get it back. When you came in, I was just on my way down to the hall to use the phone there. I didn’t want you to worry.”

Oliver’s eyes stayed on hers for some seconds longer before he sighed and leaned his head forward, resting it on her chest, so he could listen to the beat of her heart and breathe in the sweet scent of her skin. She rested her chin on the top of his head and rubbed his back, softly murmuring “I’m okay” and “I love you” to his hair.

“I’m just glad you’re okay and that situations that make me feel like I am close to losing you are rather rare,” Oliver whispered against her skin, pressing a kiss to her pulse point before locking eyes with her once more. “Do you want to-“

A light knock at the door interrupted him. Both of them looked towards the door where a nurse stood now, her cheeks flushed for interrupting this intimate moment.

“Mrs. Queen, the doctor said he has taken a look on the results of your blood test and would like to talk to you,” the nurse explained, coming closer with a wheelchair in front of her. “I will take you to the exam room.”

Oliver felt his heartbeat fast once more. Today was obviously not his day. He had just believed that everything had been going okay and that there was no reason for him to worry about Felicity or Thea and then this. How much more had his heart to take this night?   
Was Felicity drugged? Was she sick?

When the nurse started pushing the wheelchair, Oliver snapped out of his horror scenarios and got up from the bed, saying, “I’ll push her.”

 

Although Felicity couldn’t see Oliver, she knew that he was tense. She could feel it in the hand that rested on her shoulder while they waited for the elevator, and she could tell it from his irregular breathing. She tried to stay calm since she felt good and that had to mean that she was at least okay, but Oliver’s nervousness infected her at least slightly.

When the nurse left them alone in the exam room where they were supposed to wait for the doctor to come, Oliver kneeled down at her side, taking her hands in his, squeezing them gently before he said, “Everything’s going to be fine. We will get through this together. I am not letting you down.”

Felicity wasn’t sure if he said it to calm her or himself down. So she just smiled and nodded, whispering a low, “I know.”

Oliver lifted one of her hands to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. Felicity knew that he was scared. She could see it in his eyes. Her husband had always been scared of losing her or even her being hurt in any way which was why he was always so protective, even if he couldn’t protect her. So Felicity knew that this wasn’t easy for him and tried to smile comfortingly. She just wasn’t sure that it reached her eyes. They had had so much good luck lately that maybe all the good fortune destiny had owed them after everything they had been through before was used up.

“Hey, you’re gonna be alright,” Oliver promised, kissing her gently. “We are going to be alright. It’s probably just the drug. Twenty-four hours and the drug will be out of your system and this will all be over.”

She opened her mouth to say something else, but before she could make a sound, the door opened and the same doctor that had taken the blood samples from Thea and her stepped into the room.

“Mrs. Queen and I assume Mr. Queen?”

Oliver nodded shortly, shaking the hand the doctor reached out to him, and then sat down on one of the chairs in front of the desk. His hand immediately returned to Felicity’s. She entwined their fingers, holding on to him while simultaneously giving him support.

“Since we don’t know what exactly we are dealing with, we tested your blood for a lot of different things to make sure we won’t miss any anomaly. The results appear to be perfectly normal,” the doctor explained both of them, “but your HCG levels are around 6000.”

Felicity’s heart skipped a beat before it pounded wildly against her ribs. She hadn’t even for the shortest second thought this was possible. The day had been such a mess that she hadn’t thought about this, hadn’t thought something like this would happen. How could she have known? Everything had been so crazy lately.

“I take from your look that you didn’t know yet?” the doctor asked.

Felicity shook her head and answered, “I had no idea.”

“Okay, can someone please tell me what’s going on here?” a seriously confused Oliver asked, looking from the doctor to Felicity and back.

“HCG is Human Chorionic Gonadotropin. It’s a hormone,” Felicity explained to him gently.

“Is that something bad?” Oliver asked.

“It’s a pregnancy hormone, Oliver,” Felicity responded.

Oliver looked at her blankly and Felicity held her breath while she waited for his reaction to show, waited for the goofiest smile to appear on his face. But instead Oliver frowned and asked the doctor, “So the drug they tested on the club guests contained pregnancy hormones?”

Felicity could see from the corner of her eyes that the doctor started at Oliver like he was crazy, and she couldn’t even blame him for it. What ‘good’ – as in ‘I-want-to-get-high-from-drugs-good’ – could a drug with pregnancy hormones do? Not even the dumbest man could think that there was any profit to make from that.

“He tends to be a little slow on the uptake when it comes to things that could possibly make him happy,” Felicity explained before turning back to Oliver and framing his face with her hands. “Oliver, honey, I think what the doctor is trying to tell us is that I am pregnant.”

Silence settled. Oliver stared at her with the same blank expression as before. There was no sign he had even heard what she had said. Felicity knew too well that Oliver didn’t always react like most other people did. Thank God she did know that because otherwise she would have probably got worried.

“I know I am not your doctor, but if you like to, we could do a vaginal ultrasound to take a quick look on your baby and… do I need to call a team to revive your husband?”

“Oh, no,” Felicity laughed, patting Oliver’s cheeks. “He just needs a few seconds to get used to everything, and then he’ll be perfectly fine. But an ultrasound could help.”

“Well, if you say so,” the doctor replied, not sounding very convinced. “I will get a few things we need for the ultrasound. I’ll be back in five minutes.”

Felicity waited until the doctor had left before she turned back to Oliver, stroking his cheek with the palm of her hand. His stubble tickled her skin softly.

“Oliver, this is the kind of reaction I expected when I told you I was pregnant with Emmy, but instead you picked me up in your arms and swirled me around for minutes. Why this mute reaction now?”

Oliver blinked twice, the first sign that he hadn’t turned to stone.

“I thought you were drugged or sick,” Oliver said with husky voice, his hands moving over hers on his cheeks. “I thought I was going to see you suffer, and now I hear you’re pregnant. It’s-“

His voice broke when tears formed in his eyes and his body shook from a sob. Felicity didn’t hesitate for even a second before she got out of the wheelchair and sat down on Oliver’s lap, sliding her arms around him and pressing the side of his face to her chest to make him listen to the beat of her heart again. She knew it was one of the most effective ways to calm him down.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered after a while she had spent rocking him back and forth. “I know it doesn’t look like it, but I am really happy about this.”

“I know,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “Don’t worry about it. It’s a quite exciting night, hm?”

“Hmhmm,” Oliver hummed against her skin before tipping his head back to look at her. “I love you, you know that?”

“I had a slight feeling,” Felicity responded with a grin pressing a kiss to his lips.

She could feel that he was still not fully relaxed. His shoulders were tense, his hands trembling slightly and his eyes showed a deep buried pain that had been caused by the thought of losing her tonight. Still, he was way more relaxed than he had been a few minutes back.

Every remaining fear and tenseness and stress fell from him the second he heard their baby’s heartbeat. Felicity was in her sixth week of pregnancy, the baby well visible on the screen when the doctor did the vaginal ultrasound. He explained exactly what he could see and although Felicity was nosy on taking a first look on her baby, she couldn’t turn her eyes away from Oliver whose eyes were glued on what the doctor was showing him. And if Oliver hadn’t kissed her quickly she would have probably burst into tears when a single tear rolled down his cheek at the sight and sound of their baby’s heartbeat.

It was an exciting night indeed.


	52. Changes

Ever since Oliver had moved in with Felicity, he had always been excited to come home from work. The knowledge that she was waiting for him to return and that she was going to welcome him home had always made him feel kind of eager to come back. He had forgotten what home really meant until she had reminded him of its meaning. That had only intensified after they had gotten married and Emmeline had finally been born.

It was something completely different now again, Oliver realized when he directed the car into the garage and felt his heartbeat fasten slightly. Now that Felicity was pregnant again, he was even more excited to come home. He knew it was way too soon for the pregnancy to show because Felicity was only in her seventh week, but…

He couldn’t really explain. There was just something about that tiny human being growing inside of her that made home an even better place right now.

When Oliver opened the door to the house he had built for his family he immediately dropped his briefcase, got out of his suit jacket and put it over the banister. Just when he was about to head towards the living room, where he knew he could find Emmeline because he could hear the sounds of the cartoon series she was allowed to watch every evening, the door opened and Felicity stepped into the entrance.

She looked exhausted, Oliver immediately thought. Her skin was a little pale. Dark rings were forming under her eyes, and her shoulders were slumped. She had been tired a lot lately, but she refused to let Oliver help her. He had offered to take a few days off, and stay home, so she could rest, but she had rejected his offer. She had even banned him from the bathroom when the morning sickness, that tended to be more of an all-day-long sickness, had started. It wasn’t exactly easy for Oliver either. He had always used to stand right behind her, holding her hair back and rubbing her back in soothing patterns, but now all he could do was listen to how bad she felt.

“Did you bring the detergent?” she asked him, her voice sounding a little raspy.

“No, I forgot,” he answered honestly, eying her up a little worriedly. “I’ll buy it tomorrow. Baby, you look really exhausted. How about you go and get some rest?”

“Oh, you know, I would rest,” she said bitterly, “but unfortunately your daughter decided to play detective because her daddy told her that he loves to do detective work. So she has looked for evidences for whatever thing she was thinking she had to detect in the flower tubs. There is earth like everywhere on the floor in the living room and-“

She suddenly interrupted herself, holding her hands up and shaking her head. She inhaled deeply, shaking her head once more, before she stated, “I need some air.”

Without so much as even looking at him, she grabbed her jacket and left the house. Oliver noticed that she was still wearing her slippers that were probably not warm enough at this time of the year, but didn’t get the chance to say anything about it since the door snapped shut behind her with a loud bang.

Oliver breathed in deeply and sighed. Hormones were crazy little beasts. That she wasn’t allowed to drink coffee wasn’t making it easier either. During Felicity’s first pregnancy she had felt the effect of the hormonal changes, too. Back then there had been days when she had thrown plates on the floor or against the wall and she had yelled at him a lot. Those phases had never taken long, so Oliver knew all he had to do was being patient, and Felicity would soon be back to her happy self again.

While he was still lost in his thoughts, the door to the living room opened again and Emmeline ran towards her father, jumping into his arms without warning. Oliver managed to catch her, though, and hugged her close to his chest. With her hands on his shoulders she pushed herself a little higher and started peppering his face with little kisses.

“At least one person here seems to be happy to see me,” he chuckled.

 

 

Oliver was seriously worried now. It had been almost two hours since Felicity had rushed out of their house, slamming the door behind her. After the first thirty minutes he had shortly wondered if she was okay, but he had soon forgotten about it when Emmeline had started to throw her food at him, demanding his attention. When Felicity hadn’t been back after one hour, he had called Thea, asking if Emmy could stay at her place for the night. He had dropped Emmeline at Thea’s fourty minutes ago and was searching for Felicity ever since.

It was uncommon for Felicity not to tell him where she was. Even when they were fighting, she would usually send him a short message, letting him know that she was okay. Oliver knew in the back of his mind that Felicity probably hadn’t taken her phone with her when she had left and that that was the reason she hadn’t messaged him. She was probably okay.

He was running out of places to look, though, and that gave him a pretty bad feeling. She hadn’t been in the foundry and her former colleagues in the IT department hadn’t seen her in a while, either. He knew that she hadn’t been with Thea because she would have called. He had sent messaged to John and Laurel, but neither of them had seen her today. John had called him immediately, asking if everything way alright. Oliver had told him that they had had a little fight, but of course hadn’t mentioned anything about the pregnancy. Nobody knew yet. It was too early, Felicity had stated just yesterday and although-

His thoughts came to a sudden stop when Oliver saw a familiar blond ponytail. His heart eased immediately, seeing Felicity sitting on a bench in the small Starling City Park. He couldn’t see her face, but the way she just sat there, made him feel more confident in the hope that she really was okay. He took some deep breaths before he approached her slowly.

“Didn’t I once tell you that ‘I need some air’ really means ‘I don’t want to talk right now’?” she asked without turning around to look at him, instead keeping her eyes at some random point in the distance. Her hands were formed to fists in the pockets of her coat.

“I am sorry,” he said quietly, sitting down next to her. He tried to make out what exactly she was looking at, but didn’t find anything that could be that interesting. So he turned his head towards her, looking at her softly. “I am sorry for forgetting the detergent and for having inspired Emmy to play detective. I didn’t know that that would end in more work for you. I wouldn’t have told her if I had known. I know that with all the pregnancy hormones it’s not easy for you, and I didn’t want to make it worse.”

There was no sign that Felicity was listening to him, but at least she didn’t snap. So Oliver kept talking with his soft, calming voice.

“I dropped Emmy at Thea’s place. She is going to stay there for the night. So how about we go home, and I will take care of you tonight? You will get the full relaxation program. We will order Pizza or whatever you want. We also have a box of ice cream for dessert in the freezer. I can give you a massage and you can take a bath, reading a book. Or we will watch your favorite movies. We will do whatever you want to chase the effect of the hormones away.”

He smiled softly and reached out to pull one of her hands out of the pockets of her coat. The moment his skin made contact with hers, she pulled her hand away, though. Her head snapped around, so she was looking at him now. Her piercing blue eyes sparkled angrily, and Oliver’s heart sank.

“God, could you just – for the love of God! – let me breathe? For once?” she yelled, bringing more distance between the two of them. “Can’t you just – for once – leave me alone? You are everywhere! Always! You are hovering over me like some creepy stalker! Even when I say I want to be alone, you come after me!”

She got up from the bench and stamped away. Oliver watched her, eyes widened. He could think about a thousand things to say like “I am not as much of a stalker as a certain ex-boyfriend of yours” and “I was just worried because I didn’t know where you were”, but he kept his mouth shut, knowing that none of this would help Felicity to calm down and especially the first statement would make her even angrier. Of course it would. His occasional, irrational jealousy of Palmer was something Felicity always rolled her eyes about.

When Felicity suddenly stood still and turned around to come back to him, still looking angry, his eyebrows perked. He had to bite his tongue to force that quiet voice inside of himself that still thought she was the cutest person in the world to remain silent. Telling Felicity that she looked as cute as a cupcake right now would, although it was true, most likely get him killed.

He couldn’t help it. Even when she was angry at him for nothing, he still loved her with all his heart.

“Oh, and by the way,” she added when she returned, “I should be allowed to have a bad day. You are in broody mood for weeks and I am saying nothing! You could at least try to not blame it on the hormones, you know?! Just because I am usually the one with the good mood, doesn’t have to mean that I have to be that abnormally happy all the time!”

She glared at him for a moment longer before she turned around again, stomping away in the same direction as she had before. She didn’t turn back around to him this time, and Oliver just sat unmoving while watching her leave.

Oliver inhaled deeply, breathing out with a sigh. He shook his head, a slight smile playing on his lips. It really wasn’t funny. He was actually just as worried about her as he had been when he hadn’t been able to find her. But Oliver knew that this was just a short part in their life and that the effects of the hormones he still blamed for Felicity’s unusual behavior were going to cease soon. After all it was still Felicity, his personal ray of sunshine.

 

 

When Oliver returned home, everything was dark. He had given Felicity two more hours. If she wanted to have some time alone, then he was going to give that to her. He loved being with her, but if she needed some time for herself, all she had to do was say so.

Oliver took his clothes off in the bathroom and left them there. He didn’t want Felicity to wake up in case she was already asleep. So he snuck into the bedroom and closed the door quietly. He was lucky he could see that good in the dark or otherwise he would have certainly stumbled over some of the pieces of clothes that were lying around on the floor. Felicity had obviously been in the mood to just drop her clothes without caring where they landed.

He lay down in bed, never taking his eyes off Felicity, who was facing away from him. Her blond curls were spread on the pillow, and her chest was rising and falling in an even rhythm. He still wasn’t sure whether she was asleep or just acted like she did, though.

“I’m really sorry, Felicity,” he whispered into the dark. “Of course you have the right to be alone if you want to and of course you are allowed to have bad days. I’m sorry. And I love you.”

Carefully he moved closer to her, putting his hand to her upper arm for a moment before wrapping it around her waist. He moved his arm under his head to use it as a pillow and closed his eyes, feeling his tiredness crashing over him.

There were still sixteen nights to Christmas Eve. He had told Emmy before he had dropped her at Thea’s. His little girl was still convinced that he wasn’t counting right, feeling like time just refused to pass. It still made him smile.

When Felicity began to move, Oliver loosened his grip on her, thinking she was going to turn around and snuggle up to him like she usually did. His heart skipped at least one beat when he realized that instead of doing so, she wiggled out of his arms and slid to the edge of the bed, as far away from him as possible.

He tried to breathe through the pain that built in his chest at her rejection. She had never done that. Even when they had fought really badly, she would snuggle up to him. Oliver had asked her about that once, and Felicity had just shrugged her shoulders and said that they could keep fighting when they were awake. That didn’t mean she couldn’t use him as her personal heat blanket in the night.

There was a part of him that kept thinking, that she was sleeping and she couldn’t be blamed for her actions, but the fact that she had never ever done that before was making him doubt that.

It is just a phase, Oliver told himself quietly. It is just a phase. She suffers from hormonal changes. It will pass. She will come back soon.

Right before he fell asleep, not touching her for the first time in forever although she was right beside him, a horrible thought flashed through his mind, and he suddenly felt terribly awake again.

What if it wasn’t a short phase? What if this lasted?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler alarm: It will last some time!  
> Consider this a chapter to get in the right mood for the hard times that are about to come. We are just getting started.


	53. Comforting gone wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dear readers,  
> let me say a few words before we get to the chapter. I know and you know that Olicity is going through a rough patch right now. And like I told you it will get worse before it can become better (which it will).
> 
> The thing is that reading angst isn't easy (writing it isn't either by the way). So I thought maybe you would like a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel and decided to write this short chapter guide for the times that are about to come, so everyone can decide whether they want to read them or skip them or maybe read them later when they can continue with the good times right away.  
> Chapter 53 - Comforting gone wrong - Oliver has a long-planned surprise for Felicity, but she reacts different than he has hoped. (ANGST will increase)  
> Chapter 54 - Mothers - Christmas has come, but Felicity is still distant. (ANGST is still there)  
> Chapter 55 - Fatherly advice - The tension between Oliver and Felicity hits its peak. (ANGST - This will be Time for a story's "I don't want to be a woman that you love.")  
> Chapter 56 - Something wrong with me - Felicity pours out her woes and can finally make a step towards Oliver. (EMOTIONAL, but the angst will start to fade)  
> Chapter 57 - Monsters in my head - Something brings Oliver and Felicity closer to each other. (VERY EMOTIONAL, but the end of that kind angst, includes another kind of angst, though)  
> Chapter 58 - Back to normal  
> Chapter 59 - Being a family  
> Chapter 60 - [Doesn't have a name yet; will be about Emmy's birthday; pure fluff and fun with a little smut or is anyone interested in a smutty version?]  
> Chapter 61 - [Doesn't have a name yet, but will be pure fluff and fun]  
> That is as far as there are plans. I have some more ideas for special fics, but I have almost twenty pregnancy chapters that are not fully planned yet. I thought the best idea to MAKE UP TO YOU for the hard times is to ask you what you would like to read after the hard times. If you have any special wishes (I cannot take prompts for anyone's birthday, the Olicity wedding anniversary and the baby's sex/name/birth because there are plans for those chapters already) leave a comment and tell me or send me an ask/fanpost on tumblr (I use the name smkkbert there as well). Anonymous asks are possible, too. 
> 
> Now let's get to the fic. You might need tissues, chocolate and anything else that comforts you. The first part is highly inspired by... Well, you'll see.  
> I know this all looks bad, but I need you to trust me. It's all going to be okay if you just stick around long enough for the good times to come back. I'd say enjoy, but... you know... hard times... Enjoy anyway!

Felicity’s ‘state’ as Oliver had begun to call it due to the lack of a better word had intensified during the last week. Since the evening she had snapped at him, Felicity had completely sealed herself off from him. She avoided him as good as possible, especially when Emmy was around, and when she couldn’t avoid him, she almost ignored him. Sometimes she sent short gazes in his direction, but as soon as he turned his head to look back at her, she looked away. She only talked to him when it was necessary and had limited their touches to accidental skin contacts.

Oliver tried his best to give her the room she needed. He spent more hours at work or in the Arrow cave. He didn’t want to make it any harder for her. Oliver knew that the situation wasn’t easy for her. He could see it in her eyes. She suffered, and he didn’t want it to make it any worse by blaming her for feeling the way she felt. So he let her avoid him and didn’t say anything about the fact that she didn’t let him touch her, didn’t talk to him, didn’t look at him and still slept at the edge of the mattress with her back turned towards him.

It was hard because he missed her like crazy, but he knew if he just gave her the time she needed, she would come back to him. And more importantly – she would come back to herself.

He wasn’t perfect, though, because as much as Oliver had tried to leave her alone, he couldn’t resist to at least try cheering up. Before they had learned that she was pregnant, he had worked on a thing to make her happy. He knew that she was exhausted and miserable right now, but he still wanted to give it a try. If it didn’t make her as happy as he hoped for, it would hopefully distract her for a few hours. Right now that seemed like a realistic goal.

When he parked the car, Felicity sighed for like the hundredth time since they had left their home and taken off to drive to the studio where an episode of his favorite wrestling show was produced today. It was a rare opportunity to see this because they usually produced the show in New York, and he refused to leave his family for more time than necessary. Oliver had made them an offer they hadn’t been able to refuse, though.

“Are you okay?” he asked worriedly.

“Sure,” she said, taking off her seatbelt and opening her door. “Won’t take that long, right?”

“Right,” he said, nodding.

Oliver still had no idea how he had managed to convince her to come with him. Of course she knew how much he loved wrestling and especially this show, but she had been that closed off during the last days that he had been more than surprised when she had agreed. He had promised her that it wasn’t taking too long because the pregnancy made her tired and coffee was no option right now which was why she needed at least four more hours of sleep each night than usually and took a nap every afternoon. Even when she wasn’t pregnant, he wouldn’t want to mess with a tired Felicity.

When they entered the studio, Oliver guided her right to the front row. They had a perfect view on the ring where two of his favorite wrestlers, Ravager and The Wrath, were going to fight each other. While they waited for the fight to begin, Oliver thought about what Felicity was going to say after the match. Hopefully it was at least making her smile. It would make him happy, even if it lasted for only a second. He really needed to see Felicity smile again. He’d give anything to see her smile again.

During the fight his excitement only increased. He had spent weeks planning everything out. He had made plans, signed contracts and been excited about all of this ever since. When Ravager pushed The Wrath to the floor and held him there, Oliver knew the moment he had been waiting for so long was soon to come, and he carefully glanced at Felicity, who watched the fight. Her face didn’t give away how she felt about this.

Ravager lifted his hands to the sky in triumph when suddenly a red dressed figure slid down under the lowest rope and into the ring, pushing Ravager down to give The Wrath time to get up. While The Flash, how the red dressed fighter had named himself much to Barry’s amusement, kicked Ravager who was already down, Oliver felt his muscles tense in excitement. Soon one of his childhood dreams would come true.

The referee made wild gestured to chase The Flash out of the ring. Of course all of this was scripted, and Oliver had read the scripts that often that he wasn’t surprised by any of the actions, but it was still exciting to actually see everything acted out. He could only imagine how great it would feel to actually be part of it.

The Flash turned around suddenly, and his due to the contacts red eyes stared directly at Oliver. He could see from the corner of his eyes how Felicity looked from him to The Flash and back at him again, probably sensing that something was going on here. And she was right. Something was definitely going on here because The Flash jumped over the highest rope and out of the ring. Putting his hands together, he held his hands in front of his face, the flash on his gloves good to see for Oliver. Slowly The Flash approached him. When they stood not much further away from each other than the length of an arm, The Flash lowered his hands, coming even closer. His lips were formed to a mocking grin. His red eyes still focused on Oliver’s face.

God, this was going to be so good! Oliver could feel his skin start tingling in excitement. He had waited so long for this moment, had kept it a secret from Felicity for so long. He had been unable to not tell everyone else, but he had at least wanted to surprise her with it. And her opinion was the only one that counted.

The Flash laughed mockingly and turned back around to the ring. Oliver felt his heartbeat fasten even more. His moment was about to come. Just then The Flash turned back around, put his hand right into Oliver’s face and pushed him down hard. Oliver barely registered that Felicity’s eyes widened, her gaze turned from Oliver to The Flash and back again quickly, and she bit down on her bottom lip. Without hesitation Oliver took off his cap, throwing it on his seat carelessly before jumping over the barrier that separated the viewers from the wrestlers, and over the rope into the ring. The crowd was cheering even before he put his arms around The Flash and tackled him down to the floor, immediately starting to beat him up. His fist didn’t make contact with The Flash’s face, though. After all, it was still just entertainment.

Oliver had been so excited for this. He still was of course. He had once told Felicity about his love for wrestling. He had loved it since he had been a child, but had soon forgotten and not thought about it anymore because firstly, his mother hadn’t been too pleased with his love to this sport and secondly, he had been a spoilt little brat who had felt like he had better things to do and thirdly, after the island he hadn’t feel like making dreams come true had been in the cards for him. Felicity had been the one to remind him of all the dreams he had had, and she had also been the one to encourage him to live his dreams.

“If you really want to take part in something like that, do it,” she had said before she had started to grin and had explored his naked chest with her hands. “Besides, you know how much I enjoy watching you do any kind of sports that shows the play of your muscles and make you sweat.”

Oliver would smile at this perfect memory that warmed his heart even now, thinking about it. But he was too busy to keep hitting The Flash’s face. He was soon pulled away, though. Three strong pairs of hands pulled him off the figure and away from him. He fought against them or at least acted like he did. Truth be told, if he had really tried, the guys would have lain on the floor within seconds. But of course he couldn’t give away what a skilled fighter he really was. So he just struggled like a normal man of his size and his strength would, never enough to free himself. Meanwhile The Flash crawled under the lowest rope into the arms of The Wrath and out of the ring, acting overly shocked by Oliver’s attack.

It was great, perfect even. They had worked on this for so long, and he had waited for it so long, and it was worth every second. And it would get even better. There was still so much more to come. Oliver was led to Pitbull, the Executive Vice President of the entertainment company the show belonged to. The cameras were following, broadcasting what was happening to the various screens in the show hall and on TV. Ravager stood by his side, the three guys who had pulled him away near enough to hold him back if he freaked out once more.

“Are you alright?” Pitbull asked.

“Yeah,” Oliver panted a little and waved the question aside. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

He looked at the floor guiltily. Thank God his double life had made him an acceptable actor because otherwise he wouldn’t have been able to suppress the happy smile.

“Alright, so here is the thing,” Pitbull started to explain. “I brought you here as a guest, as a spectator and not a participator. You understand me? You’re lucky you walked out of that ring in one piece.”

Oliver lifted his gaze to Pitbull, still looking guiltily.

“But The Flash was the one to start all this,” Ravager said.

“I will deal with The Flash,” Pitbull promised.

“Hey, let us deal with The Flash” Oliver suggested, having trouble to not ask for a solo match. He could easily take The Flash, no matter how much more experience in wrestling that guy had. His five years away had taught him more than any wrestling career could have.

Pitbull laughed at the suggestion. Officially, Oliver was nothing but an ex-cheater and business man of strong build. The crowd was cheering, though. As Felicity always said, he was a strong, very handsome man and well-known face in women’s magazines. At least the ladies would be too happy about him joining in something like that, she had said when they had talked about his dream.

“Look, let me make one thing clear to you. You are not now, nor will you ever be one of us,” Pitbull told him.

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” Oliver replied, not sounding guiltily anymore. “I get it. I’m not one of you. But I am a man and if some guy put his hands on me, especially in front of my wife, I gotta fight back.”

Oliver had made up that line himself and he had been so proud when the writers had agreed to it. He had wanted to bring Felicity into this. He knew she had a particular weakness for him when he became all ‘grrr’, especially when it was played and she didn’t have to worry about anything or felt like she had to rant and rave at him for it.

“So let the two of us take care of The Wrath and The Flash,” Ravager suggested, “at the first match in the new year.”

Pitbull laughed about the idea and was about to send Oliver to the parking lot, but Oliver interrupted angrily, “I tell you what! Whatever your lawyers want me to sign, I’ll sign! I take full responsible for what happens! Make the match!”

“You want to play tough guy, huh?”

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered with a nod of his head. God, he wanted to play tough guy!

“Alright, you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into. I will have legal papers draft and I will have them in your lawyers’ hands. I want you to sign every single one of them by 9 o’clock tomorrow morning.”

“Fine,” Oliver nodded. He had signed the contracts and sent them back to Pitbull’s office already.

“I am washing my hands of this whole thing. I am not gonna be responsible for your funeral. So if you want it, then fine! The Wrath and The Flash against Ravager and Oliver Queen at the beginning of next year.”

Oliver held his hand out for Pitbull, and he grabbed it to shake it strongly, leaning forward to say, “Oh, and don’t bring a bodyguard. Cause this is on you. Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”

He shook Ravager’s hand. The wrestler had been all in when Oliver had presented his idea to the management of the show. Everybody had been all in, feeling the excitement.

Oliver strolled back to his place, thinking about all of this. He had been so nervous, not sure whether it would be as good in action as it had been on paper already. His whole body was tingling from the adrenalin that had flashed through his body during all this. It had been even better than he had imagined. He would probably spend the rest of the year watching the video over and over and over again.

All his excitement and joy vanished soon, though, when he returned to Felicity whose face looked like it was made of stone. It was frozen and unmoving; her jaw clenched tightly, her eyes looking angry and tired at the same time.

“Can we leave now?” she asked without looking at him, her eyes still focused on the ring.

“Yeah, sure,” Oliver replied immediately, taking his cap from the seat next to her and swallowing thickly.

During the drive home she said no word. Sitting on the passenger seat, she stayed unmoving with her arms slid around her legs to hold them tightly against her chest. Her cheek rested on her knees and like way too often those last weeks she was facing away from him. If he couldn’t see the regular rising and falling of her chest, he would reach out his hand and check is she was still breathing.

It had all been planned to make her happy, to entertain Felicity. That had been the reason he had done it. Fine, he had wanted to it because it had been his childhood dream, but ever since he had started the actual planning, it had been about Felicity. He had thought about what would make her happy and excited, even arouse her maybe. And now she was all quiet, not saying a single word.

When they arrived back home, Felicity headed towards the kitchen, leaving her sneakers carelessly in the middle of the room where she had taken them off. Oliver followed her quietly, leaning into the doorframe and watching her. She stood at the sink, filling a glass with water, and immediately downed it in one go. Her hands were shaking slightly when she put the glass away, took off her glasses and splashed water to her face and her neck.

“Are you okay?” he asked worriedly.

“I’m fine,” she whispered, drying her face with one of the dishtowels.

“You don’t look fine.”

Felicity snorted. “Nice.”

Oliver bit his tongue, pressed his lips together and looked down at the floor. Explaining that that wasn’t what he had meant wasn’t going to do any good. It seemed like everything he had said lately was wrong. And for that reason he knew that it was probably the worst timing ever, but he still couldn’t stop himself. He felt like a four year old boy, begging for attention.

“So… what do you think about this evening? Did I manage to surprise you?”

“Surprise me?”

Her voice was calm, but Oliver knew there was a new storm building inside of her. Her eyes were angry when she finally looked at him. All tiredness was gone. He knew Felicity too well to not know what was going to happen next. So here we go again, he thought, straightening and biting his tongue a little harder.

“Oh, let me tell you how surprised I was when the CEO of a multibillion-dollar company started to flog someone live on TV. What the hell were you thinking? You represent that company, so you have to be professional. How are other CEOs able to trust in you if you randomly punch people? Besides, you are father. You have a daughter who looks up to you like she does to nobody else. If she sees any of that, what do you think she will do?” she asked, not letting him answer. “I’ll tell you. Emmy will start to randomly punch people because hey, daddy has done it! Great job, Oliver, really!”

Oliver pressed his lips together and looked to the floor, avoiding Felicity’s blaming gaze. She was right. He hadn’t thought about any of this because he had been too excited. The only thing he had focused on had been his dream and Felicity’s opinion. He had thought that she would like it, but he had been wrong obviously.

“What if anyone finds out that you are Arrow?” she kept going. “And what happens when you get yourself hurt? I have a very exhausting almost two year to take care about and I do not need a husband who is knocked out, not able to help me and making even more work.”

“I can still cancel the match,” Oliver offered quietly, pushing his hands to the pockets of his jeans.

“Oh, yeah,” Felicity laughed ironically. “You cancel the match, telling everyone your wife doesn’t want you to be part of it, and I am the bitch who forbad her husband to do some childish something he so desperately wants to do. You got yourself into that, you will do that now. Have fun!”

Grabbing her glasses, Felicity went towards the door, and Oliver hurried to move out of her way. Her posture seemed slumped again when she went upstairs, sighing, “I’m tired. I’ll go to bed. You should go and get Emmy.”

Oliver stood still like he was glued to the spot, looking towards where Felicity’s feet had disappeared on the topmost step of the stairs. His heart pounded strongly although it felt like it was held in a tight fist. He had to rub his chest on the left side to ease the pain. It was one thing that she treated him like crap right now. It was hard and it hurt, but seeing her feeling so miserable and lost, really broke him. He could tell from every of her movements that Felicity was not okay. She just wasn’t, but he didn’t know what to do about it. What he had done today had been the best plan he had ever had. If that didn’t comfort her, nothing would. And he felt like everything he did was just making it worse anyway.

“This is just because of the hormones,” Oliver began to quietly whisper the mantra to he had created a few days ago to himself. “Felicity is okay. She will come back to herself and she will come back to me. Everything is going to be alright.”

He repeated it three times before he felt the meaning of his words sink in. Slowly he took in a deep breath, feeling his chest easing. Yes, everything was going to be alright.

 

 

“Really?” Thea asked surprised when Oliver explained that he had come by to pick up Emmy. “I’ve arranged everything to have Emmy sleep here. I thought Felicity was going to climb you like a tree and the two of you would do it all night long, and the fact that I know so much about my brother’s sex life is actually kind of disgusting. Anyway, I don’t think I am giving Emmy back to you just yet.”

Oliver forced himself to a short smile. “Felicity had an exhausting day. She needs Emmy home and…”

His words trailed off and he shrugged his shoulders. He really wanted to talk to Thea about this. She knew Felicity and she knew him. And even if she was younger, wasn’t married and had no children, she might have a word of advice. But he wasn’t allowed to tell her about the pregnancy and there was no way for him to tell her about what was going on without telling her about the pregnancy, too.

“She wasn’t all excited about that wrestling thing?” Thea asked while she packed Emmy’s bag. “I’m surprised. I mean, Roy, Emmy and I have watched it and it was great. I have betted that Felicity would print ‘Team Queen’ shirts and give them away a presents in the entire city to support you.”

“I hope you didn’t put too much money on it.”

“I didn’t get to put any money on it because there was nobody who wanted to bet against me,” Thea explained. “Emmy is upstairs in her room, playing with her toddler’s laptop. I’ll go get her.”

 

 

When Oliver got back from Thea’s, he had trouble to keep Emmeline quiet. Thea had denied it, but he was sure that his sister had given his daughter way too much sugar, causing her to be bubbly now. She was a little talker anyway, but whatever Thea had given her had increased that even more. So he put his fingers to his lips and whispered, “We need to be quiet because mommy is asleep and we don’t want to wake her.” Emmy mimicked his gesture immediately, putting her finger to her lips, too.

“I will put you straight to bed now,” he whispered after he had closed the door behind them.

“Pssst,” Emmy hushed, putting her little hand over her father’s mouth. “Mommy is asleep.”

He smiled lovingly at his daughter. She wasn’t even two years old, but she was so perfectly caring already. She understood so much and was so smart. Just like her mother who-

had kicked him out of bed, Oliver ended his thought when he found his bedding perfectly folded on the couch. His stomach cramped painfully and he started to repeat his mantra once again, “This is just because of the hormones. Felicity is okay. She will come back to herself and she will come back to me. Everything is going to be alright.”

Everything was going to be alright. It was just going to take a little longer than he had thought.

“Emmy, you want to do a slumber party on the couch with daddy?” Oliver asked.

Emmy clapped her hands delightedly, but soon remembered that she had to be quiet and put her finger to her lips once more, hushing herself.

“Daddy?” she asked later when she lay on his chest, snuggled up to him.

“Yes, sweetie?”

“How long to Christmas?”

“Eight more nights to Christmas Eve,” he replied. “That’s not that long.”

Emmeline grumbled a little, but soon fell asleep on his chest, her little fists holding onto his shirt. He gently rubbed her back, enjoying the feeling of her light bodyweight resting on him and feeling her heart beat quickly.

Eight more nights to Christmas. Oliver had the bad feeling that whatever the hormones were currently doing to Felicity wouldn’t stop before the holidays. So this Christmas might be even worse than the one before. Last year at least the Christmas Days themselves had been wonderful. Felicity and he had been perfectly fine. They had spent a lot of time with all their friends and family and even more in the small group of just the three of them.

“This is just because of the hormones. Felicity is okay. She will come back to herself and she will come back to me. Everything is going to be alright.”

Oliver repeated the mantra again and again, never louder than a barely audible whisper. It got harder and harder to believe in it, but at least it made him – after three hours of repeating it to himself – fall asleep.


	54. Mothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: "Felicity was in her ninth week of pregnancy, it was Christmas Day, all their loved ones had come over to their home to celebrate together, and he hadn’t had a normal conversation with his wife in more than two weeks. "  
> For a full chapter guide see chapter 53. This one got a lot worse than it was intended, but that might make reading the chapter after this easier. I almost finished writing chapter 54, but I want to be at least party finished with chapter 55 before I publish it. It would be cruel to let you wait after what happens in the next chapter...
> 
> Remember - If you have any fluffy stories in mind that I should write to make up to you for the hard times here, send me a fanpost/ask on tumblr (I use the name smkkbert there as well) or just leave a comment. :)

Like most children Oliver had always loved Christmas. There were presents and good food, everything was decorated nicely with beautiful lights and everyone sang Christmas Carols he could have listened to all year long. But what he had loved most about the holidays had been the time he had been able to spend with his family. All year his father had been working and had gone on business trips to everywhere in the world and his mother had spent her time organizing fancy teatimes and dinner parties with her friends. There hadn’t been much family time during the year, but at Christmas it had been just the four of them – his dad, his mom, he himself and later Thea – because after his grandparents had died, there hadn’t been any close relatives left to come over. Tommy had joined them for two years after his mother had died and his father had been temporally absent, though.

In Oliver’s early childhood they had left to spend the holidays in one of their vacation houses. They had always had a tall tree he and his father had cut down together the day before Christmas. He had decorated it then. They had spent Christmas Eve reading or watching ‘A Christmas Carol’ by Charles Dickens together, eating the cookies Rasia had baked for them. On Christmas Day he had usually waked his parents early because he had been impatient to open his presents. When all presents had been opened and admired, they had had breakfast together and spent the rest of the day trying out whatever Santa had given them. It had been very simple, but perfect nonetheless because it had been precious time with the people closest to him.

The last time they had spent Christmas like that Oliver had been eleven. He remembered telling Tommy that they were going to spend Christmas there together the next year, too, and Tommy had immediately said that he would join them again. But everything had come differently. Malcolm had come back soon after Christmas, and Tommy had spent less time at Oliver’s place although they had still been together a lot. His mother had started to do more charity work, and when it had been time for Christmas again, his parents had had him sit down and had told him that they wouldn’t celebrate Christmas in their vacation house that year. He had been so disappointed.

Christmas had soon become less intimate then because his parents had organized a big party, and he had been forced to share their attention not only with his little sister, but a bunch of people he had barely known at all. They had still tried to make it as nice as possible with Christmas trees in every room and at least a few hours where it had been just them, and all conversations about the company and the parties had been silenced. The hours that they had spent with exactly those things again, Oliver had turned all his attention to Thea, the only family who had been just as excited about the holidays because of the holidays themselves as he had been.

But he had reached puberty eventually, had lost a lot of his excitement about spending time with his family and therefore about Christmas. He had still liked to spend time with Thea and his parents for a few hours those days, but other things had been more important to him at that point.

And then he had been away from home for five years. God, he had missed Christmas back then. He had never felt more alone at the holidays than during that time.

Until now.

He was surrounded by friends and family – Felicity and Emmy were there of course, Thea and Roy had come, Donna had traveled all the way from Las Vegas and hat brought Quentin and Laurel with her, the Diggles been invited, their friends from Star Labs had come and Ray had flown all the way here – and still he felt alone. Lonely even.

When he had married Felicity, he had promised himself that he would give her and their children the best holidays every year. He would keep their loved ones all for himself on Christmas Eve and invite their family and closest friends at Christmas Day. Those holidays were only for the people closest and everyone should be happy.

He had almost ruined that last year when he had been that broken about Emmeline’s habit to call every man Daddy that he had closed himself off from his family the weeks before the holidays. He had only managed to put himself back together when Diggle had kicked his ass. He was lucky he had such a good friend because thanks to him Oliver had managed to return to his family right in time to celebrate Christmas with them.

He had wanted to make this up to his loved ones, especially to Felicity, this year. She had not once blamed him for his absurd behavior back then. Instead, she had just accepted his need for a little distance and patiently waited for him to come back to her and Emmeline, welcoming him home with her arms wide opened when he had been ready. He had never forgotten how much she had helped him to get through that by just accepting him the way he was. And he had promised himself to give her the same gentle treatment if she was in need.

Now she was and he had kept his promise so far, but it was getting harder and harder with every minute. Felicity was in her ninth week of pregnancy, it was Christmas Day, all their loved ones had come over to their home to celebrate together, and he hadn’t had a normal conversation with his wife in more than two weeks.

Oliver leaned in the door frame and watched Felicity from afar, ignoring all the other people around him. She was so beautiful with her blonde hair down and her glasses put perfectly on her nose. She wore a loose black dress that hid the slight belly he assumed was already there since she had explained to him once that the pregnancy showed earlier when it wasn’t the first. She looked healthier and more vivid than she had the last two weeks. There was barely anything left of the dark shadows that had been under her eyes way too often lately.

When he had come back downstairs after putting Emmeline to bed last night, he had been surprised to find her still sitting on the couch. Ever since her ‘state’ had begun, she had gone to bed at the same time as Emmy to not be forced to stay alone with him. So he had taken a few deep breaths to calm himself down and not get overly excited before he had approached her and sit down on the other side of the couch, giving her room.

“Hey,” he had said softly.

“Hey,” she had answered.

They had fallen into silence and not the good we-know-each-other-that-well-that-we-don’t-have-to-talk-all-the-time-silence but an awkward one. They had both stared into the empty space, unable to look at each other.

“Do you want your present?” he had asked quietly.

“I’m…”

He had glanced at her shortly, worried by the breaking of her voice. Her eyes had been filled with tears behind the glasses and her face had been all pale.

“Feli-“ he had started, but she had already gotten up and ran upstairs, mumbling something about being very sorry. So he taken off his clothes and lain down on the couch that had become his bed a few days ago.

That had basically been the best conversation he had had with her in a while. Suffice to say that his marriage was going through a rough patch right now.

Sighing, he took Felicity in once more. She looked so much happier than she had lately. There was a smile on her face that he hadn’t seen in what seemed like forever. The smile was a little tense eventually, but she hid that that well that Oliver was sure nobody but him would see. He knew her better than anyone else, and she couldn’t fool him. But no matter how much tenseness there was underneath that smile, he could still see that she felt more comfortable talking to Ray or anyone else for that matter than she had been when talking to him lately.

Usually he would feel a slight hint of jealousy, seeing Felicity talking to Ray, but not today. He was too happy that she smiled to feel anything else but relief. There was this part of him that wanted to go over and just join the conversation. Considering the expression on Felicity’s face and the wild gestures of her hands, he was almost sure that they were talking about computers, and he wouldn’t be able to add anything useful to the conversation, but at least he could listen to Felicity talk and see her more closely.

But he knew that he needed to wait for her to make the first step into his direction. Otherwise she would feel pushed or caged or whatever. He needed to be patient even if it broke his heart that the closest he could be to her without making her cry or getting snapped at was at the other side of the room.

Someone suddenly touched his shoulder, and Oliver winced. He turned around and found his little sister and Diggle right next to himself. Both of them were looking at him like they had talked to him for a while already.

“Sorry,” he said hastily. “I was…”

“Staring at Felicity?” Thea offered. “That’s how we know you, dear brother. Did wifey change her opinion about the whole wrestling thing?”

“She’s okay with it,” Oliver answered, shrugging his shoulders. He forced himself to smile, and hoped it was at least partly believable. “She’s not too happy about it, but… she’s okay.”

He told himself that it wasn’t exactly a lie. Felicity wasn’t happy about it, but she had made perfectly clear that he would do it nonetheless.

“I still don’t get why she isn’t all excited about this,” Thea sighed.

Oliver glanced at John shortly. He had his strong arms crossed in front of his chest and was eying up Oliver carefully. He could probably see the tension in Oliver’s face, his displeasure about the topic.

Thea was just about to say something more when Emmeline called for her. Emmy couldn’t pronounce the ‘th’ correctly yet. When she had first said her aunt’s name it had sounded a lot like ‘dsia’, but Thea had made her repeat her name that often that it had developed to sound more like ‘tia’. Thea claimed that it was supposed to mean ‘tía’ and her niece was a little Spanish-speaking genius already.

“Are you sure everything is okay?” John asked as soon as Thea had left.

Oliver turned his gaze back to Felicity who was now looking at whatever Ray was showing her on his phone. She looked concentrated when she pushed her glasses back in place after they had slid down on her nose a little. The tension in her face had almost completely faded.

“It’s complicated,” he answered honestly, “but it’s nothing Felicity and I can’t get through, I guess.”

John nodded, following his friend’s gaze towards Felicity, and said, “I’m the last person to doubt that. I am still worried about you, though.”

Oliver’s eyes turned to his friend in surprise. He had tried his best to act normally. He didn’t want anyone to know what was going on or rather didn’t want Felicity to think that he was going around complaining to their friends that she was acting weirdly. It was only going to cause more tension between the two of them. If that was even possible…

“I’m fine,” Oliver answered, looking longingly at Felicity once more.

“Yeah, maybe,” John sighed, knowing his friend’s stubbornness, “but if you ever feel like you need to talk, which I know is kind of unusual for you, then I am here.”

Oliver looked at his friends, thinking about repeating that everything was okay, but then decided to just give him a nod and whisper his thanks.

When they sat down to have lunch, Oliver voluntarily chose a chair far away from Felicity. The others looked at him in question, but he quickly claimed that they rarely were all together in one place, and he wanted to use the opportunity to talk to his friends from Central City a little. Besides, Donna would certainly like to sit close to Felicity since mother and daughter barely ever saw each other. Usually he was criticized for occupying his wife too much and keeping her all to himself.

The conversations during lunch went smoothly. He overheard Felicity, Laurel and Quentin talking about plans to visit Donna in Las Vegas in April or May. The Diggles, Thea and Roy discussed how much Sara had grown and how cute she was, trying to take care of the younger Emmeline. Oliver meanwhile tried to do concentrate on the conversation with Barry, Iris, Caitlin, Ronnie and Cisco without missing any of Felicity’s words. It had been too long since he had heard her voice. Yes, everything went smoothly until Donna’s voice was heard a little louder than necessary and everyone else fell silent.

“God, I was so excited about that whole wrestling thing. I invited all of my friends over, and it was so fabulous to see how jealous they were. I mean none of them has such a pretty baby boy who can easily beat up strong guys and still look hot as hell doing so for a son.”

“I don’t think I will ever get used to somebody calling Oliver ‘a pretty baby boy’,” Roy said, shaking his head.

At the same time Barry stated, “Oliver would have never been able to fight the real Flash, though. Strength doesn’t beat out speed.”

Everyone had something to say about it and sounded almost as excited as Oliver had been. He would happily join the conversation and tell how he had planned everything out and had kept it a secret for so long if he couldn’t see the tension return to Felicity’s body. Her hand formed to a fist around the napkin.

“Let’s not talk about this anymore,” Oliver suggested. “It was fun, but it’s over.”

“Oh, it’s not over,” Donna said. “I already invited everyone over for the match in the new year. Baby, you gotta beat the crap out of that guy and make Mama proud because-“

“Mom, could you please stop encouraging him?” Felicity interrupted her mother’s excitement. “It’s bad enough that he has gotten himself into this. He doesn’t need little cheerleaders to stroke his ego.”

Everyone looked down to their plates embarrassedly. Awkward silence filled the room.

“Felicity is right,” Oliver finally said, and cleared his throat. “It was a silly idea, and we should just get this over with.”

Lunch was awkward after that. The conversation John, Lyla and Quentin tried to start seemed forced, and Oliver could feel nosy gazes turn from Felicity to him and back to Felicity again.

“Wow, she’s really not into the wrestling thing,” Thea whispered to him later when they cleared the table.

“Thea, I said we won’t talk about that anymore,” Oliver whispered back and took the plates from her to carry them to the kitchen where Felicity had started to put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher.

He started helping her hesitatingly, not knowing if it was too much closeness for her, but she let it happen. It seemed to be a success even if it was a small one. Oliver tried to concentrate on the plates, though, always watching out to not accidently touch her, but the silence soon became awkward again.

“My offer is still on the table,” he said quietly. “I can cancel the whole thing. It’s not a big deal.”

“I said everything there is to say about that already,” Felicity responded, put the last plate in the dishwasher and left the kitchen without saying another word.

Oliver looked after her, feeling his heart ache with the need for his wife to get better soon. She was so out of herself that it broke his heart to watch her. She suffered even if she might not realized that herself. And knowing that was even worse than being her punching bag. He would happily accept to be her punching bag for the rest of her life if he had the feeling that she was getting better, but it really didn’t seem like it.

He left the kitchen quietly. Everyone was outside on the terrace or at least on their way there. Iris held Emmeline in her arms while Caitlin and Barry tried to put on Emmy’s shoes, but the girl was already moving her legs like she was running, making it impossible for Caitlin and Barry to put on her shoes. Felicity stood outside, her head resting on John’s shoulder while she talked to Lyla. He watched her as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, obviously enjoying the fresh air outside.

He managed to take exactly one step in their direction before his shoulders slumped and all his intentions to act as normally as possible faded. He turned around instantly, and hurried upstairs. He just couldn’t take it anymore, couldn’t fake being okay anymore. The least he needed was a short rest to get his feelings back under control.

So Oliver escaped to the balcony behind the bedroom Felicity usually shared with him, and sat down on one of the chairs there, pressing himself as close to the wall as possible, so nobody could see him. He listened and watched his friends and family in the garden. Emmy, finally with both shoes on her little feet, and Sara were playing. He heard John call, “Sara, sweetie, can you please adjust Emmy’s scarf? She is about to trip and fall.” Sara gripped both ends of the fabric, but Emmy, being all too excited about something Oliver couldn’t see from his position, started running, causing the scarf to close tightly around her throat and John hastily told Sara to let go and adjusted the scarf himself. Oliver cracked a small smile. Emmy’s excitement blinded her for everything around her, just like his usually did.

Just like his had done last week.

He felt his throat starting to burn and his hands began shaking. When his vision blurred, he rested his elbows on his knees and hid his face in his hands, effectively silencing the sobs that tried to escape his lips. His whole body was shaking as he allowed himself to give in to the pain that had built ever since Felicity had moved away from his touch more than two weeks ago, and he cried without making a sound.

Oliver couldn’t remember the last time he had cried like that. Three weeks ago he had cried one or two tears when he had listened to his baby’s heartbeat for the first time, but those had been happy tears. He had had tears in his eyes often since he had returned from the island, but he couldn’t remember if he had ever allowed himself to let them fall. Maybe when his mother had died, but the memories of her dead were indistinct.

Usually Oliver was able to deal with a lot of pain. He had to with what he did at night and everything he had experienced in the five years he had been away and the time since his return. But usually when it got really hard, he had Felicity by his side, who put her arms around him, babbled happily about nothing in particular and made him smile even if he tried his best not to.

But his beautiful ray of sunshine was unhappy or rather miserable, sorrowful, nearly broken.

How was he going to survive this? He could take a lot, including torture, but seeing Felicity like that and feeling unable to help her, was none of that. He just couldn’t live, knowing that she was that unhappy. But what was he supposed to do? He had tried to comfort her, and it had ended with her getting really mad at him. He had tried to give her room, but it felt like she was drifting further and further away from him. He couldn’t just completely back off. She was his wife and the mother of his children. Even if they weren’t married and hadn’t any children, he couldn’t leave her.

He loved her.

Oliver had lost any sense of time. He could have sat there for seconds, minutes, maybe hours when he felt a very familiar small hand on his shoulder. Immediately he turned around, expecting to find Felicity next to him, but it was Donna. His face must have given away his disappointment because Donna smiled comfortingly.

“I know you expected someone else,” she said softly, moving around him until she stood right in front him. She framed his face with her hands, wiping a few tears away with her thumbs, before she gently pulled his face forward, so his cheek rested against her abdomen. She cradled his face to her body, gently stroking his hair. “My poor baby.”

He only hesitated briefly. The only person he usually opened up to like this, the only person he usually allowed holding him when he felt like this was Felicity. Still, he put his arms around Donna’s small body and pressed his face to her stomach, crying some more. Donna just held him tightly and let him cry. She stroked his hair and his shoulders and mumbled a few words of comfort.

“I know it’s not easy,” Donna whispered when his sobs had lapsed into silence. “I know it hurts. Being married can be tough sometimes.”

Hastily he loosened his grip on his mother-in-law and wiped his tears away. He cleared his throat before he explained, “Oh, no. This is not about that little disagreement with Felicity. I just… I miss my parents.”

He almost expected Donna to smile in apology, but she frowned, saying, “Oliver Queen, don’t lie to your Mama. I can see right through my children. Whatever is going on with you and Felicity is not caused by a disagreement about wrestling. There is more behind that and there is more going on than a meaningless difference of opinions. Please just tell me that it’s not because something is wrong with the baby. I don’t think I could bear my babies losing a baby.”

She pressed a hand to her chest, the other hand holding tightly onto his shoulder.

“How do you know about the pregnancy?” Oliver asked.

“Mothers know such things,” she explained. “So the baby is fine?”

“I think so,” Oliver answered, feeling new sobs building at the thought that he had no idea if the baby was okay because Felicity refused to talk to him, but he gulped them down. “Felicity is just… stressed, I guess.”

Donna nodded slowly, framing his face once more. “I know my daughter pretty well by now. There are still things I don’t understand about her, but if there is one inevitable truth about her than it is this – Felicity loves you more than she has ever loved anyone. She loves you. She has loved you a long time before you or she herself has realized and she will love you in fifty years when the both of you are wrinkled and have twenty grandchildren.”

Oliver breathed in deeply, letting Donna’s words settle in and wash away a part of the pain that burdened his soul.

“I know she loves me,” he finally managed to say. “I have never doubted that. But she is closing herself off from me. She doesn’t look at me. She doesn’t talk to me. Those last days I have tried to find opportunities to make her mad, just to hear her yell at me, so we could at least have some kind of conversation. I am doing my best to be patient and supporting, but it doesn’t feel like whatever is bothering her is going to go away. And I can’t help her. I don’t know what to do, Mama.”

Slowly Donna leaned forward and pressed a gentle, lingering kiss to Oliver’s forehead. Oliver leaned into the kiss, sighing.

“Listen, baby,” she said, looking at him sternly. “I will ask you for something that is probably hard for you to do, but I really need you to do it – for Felicity’s sake and for your sake.”

“I’ll do anything for Felicity,” he whispered.

Donna stroked his cheek gently. “Wait for her. I know you have done that already and you are getting tired of it, but I feel like she needs it. I don’t know what is going on with her, and I don’t think talking to her would do any good right now. The first one she will open up to is probably you, but she needs time. Felicity has always been the girl to think about serious things herself before she could talk about them to anyone else. I promise you she will come back to you, and if I have to travel all the way from Las Vegas to Starling City only to kick my daughter’s butt back into your arms.”

Oliver chuckled sadly. He was kind of sure that Donna was serious about that.

“Are you ready to come back down? Emmy misses you, I guess.”

“I… need a minute.”

Donna smiled sympathetically. “Okay. I’ll go back downstairs.”

“Mama?” Oliver asked when Donna was almost halfway back in the house.

“Yes, baby?”

“Thank you.”

Smiling, Donna nodded and left Oliver alone with his thoughts.

He took a few deep breaths, feeling weak from all the crying, but at the same time weirdly strengthened. Maybe he had needed this breakdown to build himself back up again, and to be ready for more to come. Donna was right. Felicity needed time. He had known that all along, but hadn’t been able to accept it when his own sorrow and pain had increased over time.

Felicity had always been so patient with him. She had waited for him despite the fact that he had pushed her away again and again. She had come to him and declared that they were a couple and nothing he could say would change that because they loved each other and they belonged to each other. She had taken him back all the times he had left her down during their marriage, not once blaming him.

So now it was his turn to wait for her. So he would wait for her.


	55. Fatherly advice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fic I have warned will be Time for a story’s “I don’t want to be a woman that you love”. Very angsty. We will hit the floor hard, but at least that will send us back into the air a little bit because after this it can only get better.
> 
> Remember - If you have any fluffy stories in mind that I should write to make up to you for the hard times here, just tell me. :)
> 
> The next chapter will be updated in less than 24 hours. I will go hide behind a rock meanwhile.

For more than three years Oliver couldn’t have come home soon enough. He had often run from his car to the house, just to have two or three more seconds with his family. It was sappy and if he had been asked about it at the beginning, he would have lied, but yes, he was a sap like that and wasn’t ashamed of it. But now everything was different, Oliver thought and leaned his head back against the headrest of the driver’s seat, closing his eyes. It had become a horrible habit of his to stay in the car for a little while before he forced himself to get into the house.

Christmas had passed and so had New Year by now. Felicity’s ‘stage’ still hadn’t become any better. She barely looked at or talked to him. He was still sleeping on the couch. They had spent New Year’s Eve apart because Felicity had called John and Lyla and told them that she was sick and couldn’t make it to the party, but that Emmy and Oliver would come nonetheless since she would sleep through the turn of the years anyway. So Oliver had gone to that party, acted like everything was okay and had kissed Emmeline at 12 o’clock.

This week’s highlight had been the prenatal check-up. He had known for a while that the appointment was about to come. They had decided about the date and time together to make sure it wouldn’t interfere with any of Oliver’s business appointments. That had been before Felicity had started to act the way she still did now, so he hadn’t known whether Felicity had wanted him there. When she had asked him whether they were going there together or meeting there and he had answered that he didn’t know whether he was going to make it to the appointment, Felicity had looked at him with a frown on her face and asked if he had any appointment at the time. He hadn’t had, so Felicity had nodded shortly and said, “Then I expect you to come. We’ll just meet there.”

The best thing about the prenatal check-up had been that it not just had given him the chance to finally touch Felicity again, but that she had actively reached out her hand for his. Truth be told, she probably wouldn’t have done so if the doctor hadn’t needed a blood sample and had approached Felicity with a syringe in his hands without warning, but it had still felt unbelievable good to hold her hand in his and give her a little comfort. After the appointment everything had gone back to the way things had usually been lately.

Oliver took a deep breath. He had promised himself to be patient and he was giving his best, but he really didn’t think that he was going to stand the tension between him and Felicity much longer. She was in her tenth week of pregnancy now. If the twelfth week was over and she was still like this, then he would definitely do something. He would drag her to a marriage counselor and fight like hell for his marriage. There was no way he was going to lose her.

Slowly he got out of the car and made his way to the front door. He hesitated for a short second before he opened the door and stepped into the house. He noticed the sounds of Emmy’s cartoon series, slipped off his jacket and strolled to the door. Emmeline and Felicity were snuggling on the couch, watching TV. He leaned into the doorframe and just watched them quietly.

Felicity could be almost okay around other people. She was tensed with other people around, but a lot more at peace than when she was alone with him. The only time she had snapped at someone else than him had been on Christmas Day when Donna had talked about the wrestling. Felicity had snapped at her mother than, but it felt a lot like it had been directed at him. He was mostly safe from her moods when somebody else was around. Oliver didn’t know if he should be relieved that she didn’t feel miserable all the time or sad and angry that her moods seemed to be linked to his presence a lot.

He really tried to focus on the relief.

“Daddy!”  Emmeline exclaimed when the cartoon was over and she got up, standing on the couch, reaching out for him over the backrest.

“Hi, princess,” he said, lifting her into his arms. He sighed contently when Emmeline wrapped her little body around him, hugging him close. “You had a great day?”

“Yeah,” she answered, nodding her head. “But now bed.”

He was just about to ask if he should put her to bed when Felicity got up from the couch and reached out her arms for Emmy. He carefully placed the toddler in her arms, avoiding touching her. Emmeline rested her head on her mother’s shoulder, looking like she was already falling asleep.

“Say goodnight to daddy, Emmeline.”

“Night, daddy,” Emmy sighed before turning her head to snuggle her face to Felicity’s neck.

“Night, Emmy.”

Oliver sat down on the backrest of the couch, watching Felicity carry their daughter upstairs. He had wondered from time to time if Emmeline was sensing any of the tension that had built between her parents, but it seemed like the girl actually enjoyed all the extra attention. Since her parents didn’t get distracted by one another, she had their unshared attention.

He waited a minute before he grabbed his suit jacket and went upstairs, too, changing into more comfortable clothes. He listened to Felicity telling Emmeline a bedtime story from the dressing room. Her soft voice seemed to not only calm their toddler down, but him, too. When the bedtime story was over, he snuck downstairs and started cleaning the mess Emmy had made with her toys. She usually cleaned that up herself, but not today obviously.

Oliver heard when Felicity came back downstairs. This was the second time in three weeks that she stayed up although Emmy was in bed already. He knew it didn’t mean much, though. She had left only five minutes later on Christmas Eve.

“You don’t have to do that. I can do that tomorrow,” she said softly.

 Wow, she was talking to him, Oliver thought bitterly. He knew he was becoming cynical, but every time she talked to him, he was waiting for her to snap. Snapping was better than not saying anything at all, but it was getting really exhausting to prepare for her moods, especially when he had had a hard day working like he had had today.

“It’s okay,” he said and didn’t fail to realize that his voice sounded tense.

He kept putting the toys to the footlocker and pushed it to the wall, so it didn’t stand in the middle of the room. When he got up from the floor, Felicity sat on the arm rest of the couch, watching him. She didn’t look away even when his eyes met hers. There was an uncertainty in her eyes that made him frown.

“Everything alright?” he asked.

Felicity nodded, her eyes still focused on him. He slowly approached her and sat down on the armchair opposite to her. None of them said a word and Oliver wondered whether she was waiting for him to say something or whether she wanted to say something herself, so he just waited. Like he had done so often lately. She didn’t say anything, though. She just kept staring at him.

“We need to talk, I think,” he tried gently, and again Felicity nodded, so he nodded, too. “The wrestling match is coming up soon and-“

He fell silent when Felicity got up from the couch and headed towards the kitchen. He pressed his lips together tightly, but got up and followed her.

“I know you don’t want to talk about it, Feli-“

“Then why are you bringing this up again in the first place?” she asked, her voice an angry whisper when she started scrubbing the countertop.

“Well, I need to at least know if I should ask Thea to take Emmy for the day or if you are taking care of her.”

Felicity’s head snapped up, her angry eyes looking right at him. “Of course I am taking care of Emmeline. I am her mother!”

Oliver bit his tongue that strongly that he could taste blood. He had been patient. He had given her time and room. He had accepted however far she had pushed him away from her. He had tried to take a step towards her, to be gentle and undemanding, to show her that he was there for her. But enough was enough.

“You are also my wife and don’t act like it,” Oliver said bitterly before thinking about it.

“Nice!” Felicity hissed, throwing the sponge on the countertop and crossing her arms in front of her chest.

“Yeah, really nice to be married to someone who can’t look at you without being angry and can’t talk to you without snapping!” he felt like he was yelling, but he barely raised his voice.

“You know what? If it is such a burden for you to be married to me, then why the hell not put an end to it get di-!”

Oliver’s heart stood still. He stopped breathing. His eyes watched as all anger suddenly fell from Felicity’s face. Her eyes widened, tears springing into them. She stared at him, panting. Her mouth opened and closed repeatedly like she was trying to say something, but no sound came out. Oliver’s whole world stopped spinning.

They had fought for so long to finally be together. They had been through so much. They had managed to build a perfect, little life. They were a picture-perfect family – happy and loving. When had that changed? When had they changed to a couple that only talked when they fought? A couple that talked about…?

“Divorce?” he asked, feeling his voice break. “Is that what you want? To get divorced?”

He felt terribly nauseated. For so long he had believed that Felicity and he would live happily ever after. They would have more children and eventually grandchildren one day. And no matter what, they would always be together. Until death would do them apart. Death, not a stupid fight.

“Mommy?”

Felicity and Oliver both flinched when their daughter’s small voice sounded down from upstairs. She stood at the topmost step of the stairs in her pajamas, holding her stuffed giraffe pressed tightly to her chest.

“Hey, baby,” Felicity hurried to say, wiping away a tear that had escaped her eye. “What’s going on? Monsters under the bed again?”

Oliver saw his daughter nodding before Felicity picked her up and carried her back to her nursery. He waited until the door shut behind his wife before he grabbed his leather jacket from the coat rack and left, slamming the door behind him. He just couldn’t be close to her right now. His fingers tingled from the need to grab her and shake her until she would finally come back to her senses. He had never felt the need to treat her anything but gently, and although he was sure that he would never hurt her, he had the bad feeling that he might not have full control over his body right now. So he couldn’t be close to her right now.

He thought about getting in the car and just drive until the anger had eased, but he felt the urgent need to move. He also felt the need to punch something or someone, but he knew that Laurel, Roy and Thea were in the foundry and didn’t want to be asked about what was going on with him. He wanted to be alone. So he just started walking.

He had always known that he was lucky to have a wife like Felicity, and he had always felt like he didn’t deserve her. He had done so many bad things in his life that having someone like Felicity by his side had felt unfair. In the back of his mind he had always thought that someday she would see that and leave him for someone else. But she hadn’t. Instead she had married him and they had started a family and built this picture-perfect life.

Oliver had always thought that if Felicity and he didn’t grow old together, it would be because he would die on a mission or worse someone would kill Felicity because of him. He had always thought they would spend the rest of their lives together; just that life might not be as long as he had wished. God, he would even understand if Felicity left him after he had done something bad. He would deserve it then. But he hadn’t done anything wrong, and that was why he just didn’t understand why she was suddenly that unsatisfied with their life.

Could hormones mess a person up like that? Or was something else bothering her? Had she fallen out of love with him? Had she fallen in love with someone else? Was she sick? Was it the baby? No, that wasn’t possible. He had been to the check-up with her and the doctor had said the baby looked perfect.

He had no idea how long he had walked. He had no idea where he was going. He just kept walking. Well, he made a short stop in the liquor store to get a small bottle of whiskey. If he couldn’t punch anything, he would just drink instead. It wasn’t a real solution to his problem, but neither was punching people or anything else solving his problems. It wasn’t until he stood right in front of the entrance gate that he realized where his path had led him.

Oliver thought about turning around and keeping walking, but he needed to talk to someone and since the only person who knew about Felicity’s pregnancy apart from him and Felicity herself was Donna, who was far away from herein Las Vegas, this seemed like the only option. He stepped onto the cemetery and went right to his father’s grave. After the mansion had burnt down, Felicity had suggested getting a memorial stone here, right next to Moira’s grave. He barely ever visited due to the too many painful memories, but he had taken Emmeline here a few times. It had been a weird need to introduce his parents to his daughter and to tell Emmy what had happened to them, even if she was too small to understand any of what he had told her. All she knew was that her grandma and her grandpa lived at a place far away from here, called heaven. And so did Uncle Tommy. Emmy knew that heaven was a wonderful place with one single flaw – once you were there you couldn’t return to visit people you loved and the people you loved couldn’t come over to visit either. He didn’t know how much of that Emmy had really understood, but it had felt good to tell her.

Oliver crouched down in front of the memorial stone, just staring at his father’s name. He would love to have him here now. He would have loved to have him here for all the times he had struggled with being a husband and being a father. He finally whispered, “Hi, Dad. I know it’s been a while since I have been here last. If you keep track of my life you might have noticed why I’ve come here tonight. So… any fatherly advice?”

Of course he didn’t get an answer. It would have been terrifying it had been different. So Oliver straightened back up and opened the bottle of whiskey. He was just about to lift the bottle to his lips when-

“That won’t help either.”

Oliver turned around to find Quentin Lance standing right next to him, looking down at Robert’s grave. The older man put a hand to the younger’s shoulder, squeezing comfortingly. Oliver suppressed a groan. His mother-in-law’s boyfriend was like the last person he needed now. He had felt enough tension for the day and feared that he could actually hit the police captain if he made so much as one wrong comment. Felicity would never forgive him for that.

“I’ve been visiting Sara,” Quentin said with a sigh. “Talking clears the head so much more than drinking does.”

“Yeah, but I don’t have a drinking problem,” Oliver muttered.

“No, you don’t,” Quentin agreed with a nod of his head, “but what you do have is a toddler and a pregnant wife.”

Oliver looked at Quentin in surprise. He was the second person to realize that in less than two weeks. If they continued at that rate, then everybody would find out about Felicity’s pregnancy before they got the chance to tell them.

“You might have realized that your mother-in-law talks a lot,” Quentin explained. “She told me about the pregnancy and that the two of you were hitting a rough patch and asked me to keep an eye on both of you. Since I think, as reluctant I am to admit that, that we are pretty much alike, I also assume that you don’t want to talk about it. So I will just talk if you let me.”

Oliver hesitated. He wanted to be alone and clear his head. He lowered his gaze to the bottle in his hand. Quentin was right. Drinking wasn’t an option. And Quentin seemed to be the only one he could talk to this about and receive an answer. So Oliver nodded slowly.

“Felicity loves you. God knows why, but she loves you.”

“You will be happy to hear that apparently Felicity wants to get divorced.”

Quentin didn’t say anything. He just looked at Oliver with honest sympathy in his eyes before he said, “I don’t know what happened, but I can only assume that she said it in the heat of the moment and want to repeat that Felicity loves you. I am sure that she didn’t mean it.”

“I am not that sure about it anymore. She’s been closed off for weeks now.”

Quentin squeezed Oliver’s shoulder once more, saying, “I am sure for the both of us, Queen. When Dinah was pregnant with Sara, she has been miserable. The hormones drove her crazy. There have been days she has yelled, days she has cried. We fought almost all the time, but that didn’t mean that we didn’t love each other. And look at my family now.”

“You are divorced,” Oliver couldn’t help himself saying.

Quentin laughed at that. It might have been supposed to sound dryly, but came out more amused than anything and Oliver cracked a small smile.

“You’re right,” Quentin agreed. “Dinah and I got divorced, but for completely different reasons. And before we got divorce, we raised to perfect children together. We were happy. But in a time of crisis I closed off and so did Dinah and we split. A marriage doesn’t work when nobody fights for it. Dinah and I loved each other, even when I started burying myself with work and she moved to Central City. We loved each other, but we had given up on our marriage.”

Oliver thought about it. He knew that Quentin and Dinah had broken up because they hadn’t been able to handle Sara’s death. Laurel had told him how Quentin had spent all days and night working, how Dinah had left and Quentin had found comfort in alcohol. They had given up. Parents just weren’t supposed to survive their children. Oliver didn’t allow himself to even think about losing Emmy. It would tear his life apart.

“Want a fatherly advice?” Quentin asked with a sigh. “Donna thinks that what Felicity needs is room. So try to give her room. I know it’s not easy. I know it hurts and I know for certain that you already have done that, but you need to stay patient a little longer. She’ll come back and she will only feel more miserable if you make her feel anymore guilty than she probably feels already. I know it seems unfair to burden all this on you when she is the one who is acting out, but… Everything will be okay. You’ll see. And if you ever feel like you can’t hold on any longer, you call me and I give you access to a few guys that need to have some bones broken. That can help.”

Quentin clapped Oliver’s back gently before he turned around and started walking away.

“Quentin?” Oliver said, turning his head to look at the man. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Quentin said with a nod of his head, “Oliver.”

Oliver stayed a little longer, looking down at his father’s name once more.

Quentin was right. Too many people gave up too easily. They grew impatient and stopped fighting. This wasn’t going to happen to Felicity and him. They would keep fighting. And if Felicity was unwilling or rather unable to fight, then he would fight for the both of them.

He opened the bottle of whiskey once more and poured the alcohol on the floor. The empty bottle ended in the garbage can on his way out.

When he returned home later that night, Oliver tiptoed upstairs through the dark house. He could hear Felicity’s even breaths through the closed bedroom door. It sounded like she was sleeping, but he rested his forehead against the door nonetheless and started whispering the words he had prepared on his way here.

“Felicity? I don’t know if you can hear me, but I will say this anyway because it needs to be said. I don’t know what is going on with you, what is going on with us, and I have no idea if you are out of this marriage for good. But I do know two things. The first is that I am still in this marriage. I am all in, so I will fight for you, fight for us until my last breath. I’m not giving up that easily.”

He waited for any reaction, but her breaths stayed just as even as they had been before.

“And the second thing… I love you.”

Oliver took a deep breath, nodded to himself and headed back downstairs. Quentin Lance might never be his best friend, but he had been right. A marriage could only work if at least one person kept fighting. So that was what he was going to do. He would keep fighting.

 

Felicity waited until Oliver’s steps weren’t audible any longer. She turned her face back into the pillow, silencing her sobs while she continued crying like she had cried ever since she had put Emmeline back to bed that evening.

What had she done?


	56. Something wrong with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One chapter closer to the happy times. Always keep that in mind. :)

“Finally! I thought the two of you had gotten lost on your way here!”

“There are still twenty minutes to the match, Roy, so there is plenty of time. The beer is in the back of the car. Could you go get it while I will start giving everyone their shirts? Sara, honey, come here, you’re the first.”

“What shirt, Aunt Thea?”

“Aunt Laurel and I have decided to buy shirts to encourage Uncle Oliver.”

“Look, sweetie, isn’t it cute? Come here, I will help you put it on.”

“And what do the letters say?”

“’Team Queen.’”

“John, this one is yours. Where is Emmy?”

“Upstairs. Lyla changes her.”

“We are already finished. Wow, Emmy, look at those cute shirts your aunt has brought.”

“Come here, sweetheart. I will help you put it on.”

“Got her?”

“Yeah.”

Felicity sat on the couch cross-legged, watching her friends quietly. Laurel and Thea were helping Sara and Emmeline to put their ‘Team Queen’ shirts on. Emmeline seemed to be more interested in taking a look into the carton the shirts had been in, but she let Thea change her shirt. Lyla and Diggle put on their own shirts in the meantime. As soon as Roy returned with the beer, Thea threw a shirt into his face, demanding he should dress up for the match. Everyone was happy and laughing, being all excited about the match.

And all Felicity could feel was guilty.

Guilt had become a constant companion within the last month. Ever since she had started to feel the change in her moods, she had felt guilty. She had felt guilty for feeling so bad although pregnancy was supposed to be the happiest time in a woman’s life. She felt guilt for feeling so bad although she had wanted this baby for so long. She felt guilty for feeling so bad although Oliver had been so happy.

Had been. He wasn’t anymore. She had seen how the excitement had decreased and decreased until there had been no joy left. She had ruined that for him. She had ruined all the excitement he had felt about the pregnancy. She had ruined all the excitement he had felt about the fulfillment of his childhood dream. She had ruined Christmas and New Year’s Eve. And now she was ruining her whole marriage.

“Felicity, what about you?” Thea asked. “A ‘Team Queen’ shirt?”

“I’m actually a little cold, so I think I’ll pass,” Felicity answered, pulling the blanket she had wrapped around herself more tightly around her. She was indeed freezing. Besides, she probably didn’t fit into the shirt anyway. Her stomach was slightly round by now. It wasn’t visible under the wide pullovers she had worn lately, but everything that hugged her figure would let the pregnancy show.

“You want a tea?” Lyla asked, putting a hand to Felicity’s shoulder.

“Thanks, but I think the blanket is enough.”

Lyla smiled at Felicity, giving her shoulder a comforting squeeze before she went back to the kitchen to get the popcorn while the others sat down on the couch and armchairs. John sat down right next to Felicity, giving her knee a short squeeze. Felicity smiled at him and hoped that is looked at least partly believable. She didn’t feel like smiling. If it had been up to her, she would have locked herself in her bedroom and cried all day, but Thea had invited everyone over to Felicity’s and Oliver’s house to watch the wrestling match together. So Felicity smiled bravely against the flood of tears she knew were going to come sooner or later.

Her whole body tensed when the match started. She felt her breath shorten and she had to remind herself to breathe in and out evenly or she would have hyperventilated or stopped breathing at all.

The Wrath and Ravager started, so Oliver stayed outside of the ring. Felicity bit her tongue when the reporter made a comment about how the female viewers were probably disappointed about the fact that he wore a muscle shirt and hid the abs everyone knew he had. Oliver didn’t hide his abs, but the scars of torture his body was signed with.

“God, Oliver is going to crush them all at once,” Roy explained.

“I’m not so sure about that,” Diggle said, earning him questioning gazes that made him laugh. “Don’t get me wrong. Oliver could just crush them easily, but he is still just a business guy, at least officially.”

“But the whole thing is scripted,” Laurel thought out loud.

“And I can’t picture Ollie being okay with losing even if it is scripted,” Thea added, tickling Emmeline and making her giggle. “Who wins today, Emmy?”

“Daddy!”

Felicity tried to be as excited as they were, but failed. She should have been there in the first row, encouraging him and smiling at him lovingly, but she sat here and watched TV like it was the most horrible thing she had ever been forced to watch. She knew that usually she would be the first to bet on Oliver’s victory and the first to bombard him with questions about the script. But she hadn’t done any of it. Instead she had snapped at him and felt annoyed by watching him living his childhood dream. A childhood dream she had encouraged him to live more than once before.

There had to be something wrong with her.

Her breath caught in her throat when suddenly The Flash – when had he got into the ring? – made gestures to show that he wanted Oliver in the ring, too. Oliver put his hands on the topmost rope and jumped up on it and into the ring. Felicity’s guests were cheering happily, giving her a terrible headache in addition to the stomach cramps and the feeling of a fever she already had. She felt like she was on the verge of crying.

“The Flash is already scared!” Sara stated, clapping her hands proudly, when Oliver approached The Flash and the heavily made-up figure eased back.

But The Flash suddenly pushed Oliver down, letting him fly across the ring and fall to the ground. Felicity flinched at the loud sound it made when Oliver’s body hit the floor. Immediately John’s hand found hers that had formed to a tight fist around the blanket. He entwined their fingers and stroked the back of her hand with his thumb reassuringly.

“It’s all scripted, Felicity,” he whispered gently. “Oliver knows what is happening and he can take it. He has taken a lot worse than that.”

Felicity nodded barely visible and tightened her grip on John’s hand. She knew he was right. Oliver had survived much worse than this. It still wasn’t easy watching him get through this, though. What if something happened and the last thing she had said to him was that she wanted to get divorced.

Divorce. The word had been resounding in her head again and again ever since she had almost said it out loud. It was like a screech that echoed through her memory and ran cold shivers down her spine. She had never felt the brutality of a word that strongly as she did with this. Divorce.

On screen Oliver got back to his feet and kicked The Flash into the chest. The squealing sound of the cheering crowd in TV mixed with the excited sounds of the people in Felicity’s living room. Sara almost rolled from the couch, laughing, but was caught by Roy who sat her down on his lap and hugged the girl to his chest. Roy rolled his eyes when a close-up of Oliver getting up from the floor smoothly was shown, and he groaned, “Braggart!”

“Braggart!” Emmeline echoed immediately.

“Thanks, Roy,” Felicity murmured, feeling unbelievable tired. “I think you have taught my daughter her first swear word.”

“Sorry, Felicity,” Roy called across the room.

Felicity cracked a small smile. She had always imagined that it would Oliver her she herself who would accidentally teach their daughter her first swear word. They would fight about something stupid as wet towels on the bed and she would say something like ‘dumbass’ or he would say ‘smart ass’ and Emmeline would repeat it happily unaware of the meaning.

She looked back at the screen just in time to see how The Flash pushed Oliver down to the floor hard. He had trouble getting back to his feet again. Felicity knew that those fights were scripted, just as John had told her and Oliver had told her before him, but the injuries could still be pretty real.

“Daddy hurt?” Emmeline asked, turning her head to Thea, on whose lap she sat.

“No, they are just playing Emmy,” John offered, tugging at one of his goddaughter’s blonde locks to distract her from what was happening on the screen. His other hand still held Felicity’s smaller one.

Everyone held their breath when it seemed like Oliver was pretty lost in the ring, but soon the fight increased its dynamic and Oliver threw The Flash on the floor, making everyone cheer happily once again. Only Felicity sat still on the couch, feeling cold and nauseated. She had seen Oliver go through much worse, but sitting here and watching him join in this fight, even if it was an acted one, seemed unbearable. How was it possible that she would usually be cheering with the others?

She abandoned the thought, pushing it out of her mind, and refocused on the match.

The Flash had now gotten The Wrath into the ring. The professional wrestler was taller than Oliver, his chest broader and Felicity was pretty sure that he was stronger, too. Felicity could barely keep her eyes on the screen when The Wrath forced Oliver into a corner. Oliver’s back slammed against the rope and Felicity held her breath when the Wrath hit Oliver on the head hard.

Felicity flinched once more, and John put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to his warm body. She rested her head on his shoulder, but her body stayed just as tense as it had been before. She just couldn’t relax.

“No, not his pretty face!” Thea exclaimed.

Felicity had to watch as The Wrath dragged Oliver out of the corner he had pushed him to before and lifted him onto his shoulder. Oliver started to fight back, though. He got out of his opponent’s grip and pushed the wrestler away from him. When The Wrath moved back towards Oliver, he easily jumped over him, but wasn’t fast enough to duck away from the kick in his ribs that pushed him to the floor. And The Wrath didn’t stop. He kicked him strongly, and then pushed him into the same corner where The Flash waited.

And even though John was still mumbling comforting words into her hair and keeping her hand in his, Felicity felt a strong wave of nausea build when The Flash started to kick Oliver again and again. Scripted and acted or not, Felicity couldn’t stand it any second longer. One hand in front of her lips, she jumped from the couch and ran up the stairs, barely hearing Thea ask if she was okay before she hastened through her bedroom and into the bathroom en suit. She got down on her knees with her head over the toilet just in time before she started to vomit.

Felicity felt tears streaming down her face while her stomach emptied itself. She couldn’t say if it had been a consequence of the cruelty of the match, a symptom of the so called morning sickness that seemed to last all day long or a sign of her emotional stress. She had felt sick for weeks, and the fight with Oliver had only increased that.

What had she done?

It was always the same question that came to her mind when she thought about that fight.  
What had she done?  
How could she have said something that cruel?  
How could she expect Oliver to forgive her? Ever?  
How could she forgive herself?

She flushed the toilet, but kept her head where it was, not trusting her body to be completely okay. Her stomach still cramped painfully. And she was still crying, not because of the vomiting now, but because of everything else that was bothering her and that she had swallowed down and suppressed way too long. She had never wanted this, any of this, but despite her best efforts she had managed to mess everything up that she had wanted to protect so badly. The thoughts increased the feeling of nausea once more. She gagged two or three times, but her stomach seemed empty.

It wasn’t until she felt someone move her hair and put a wet washcloth to the back of her neck that Felicity realized that she wasn’t alone. She hastily wiped her tears away, and turned her head to see Lyla crouching on the floor right behind her. Felicity was about to say something about apparently being sick or having eaten something wrong, but Lyla shook her head, knowing exactly that her friend wanted to lie to her. So Felicity just pressed the washcloth against the back of her neck and leaned back on the bathtub, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths.

She had thought about talking to someone once or twice, but it had only made her feel guiltier that she had known from the start that that person could not be Oliver. Whenever she had tried to talk to him, she had snapped and made every worse. And she had felt that Oliver had deserved to be the first to know what was going on with her. So she had kept her mouth shut and not talked to anyone.

“Don’t you want to tell me what’s wrong?” Lyla finally asked gently.

Felicity breathed in deeply and sighed. Oliver had needed to swear to her to not tell anybody that she was pregnant, and she had sworn herself to keep her mouth shut about it, too. To tell someone about it now wasn’t fair towards Oliver who had probably not told anyone because he had promised her. But he was going to leave her anyway, so...

“I am pregnant,” Felicity replied with a sigh, and put a hand to the slight swell of her stomach, rubbing it in comforting patterns.

“But that’s good, isn’t it?” Lyla asked quietly. “Oliver and you wanted another baby, right? There has to be a reason he built a house with four nurseries.”

Felicity tried to crack a laugh, but it turned into a sob, and she hastily hid her face in her hands. She couldn’t stop the tears escaping her eyes, couldn’t stop the sobs coming from her lips. Her whole body was shaking from crying. She had almost believed that no tears were left since she had been almost constantly crying for the last days, barely able to put herself together to not scare Emmy.

Lyla slid across the floor until she sat right next to Felicity. She gently cradled her friend’s head and pushed it down until it rested on her thighs. Felicity cried for some time. She didn’t know how long, and Lyla let her. She combed Felicity’s hair with her hands, and waited for her friend to be ready to talk to her.

She had no idea how long she had been crying. All she knew was that her head ached like crazy and she could barely breathe although the sobs were slowly fading away. Felicity stayed unmoving in Lyla’s arms for some more time, forcing herself to take deep breaths and calm down.

“I’m sorry,” she finally managed to say, moving to sit up.

“You don’t have any reason to apologize, Felicity,” Lyla responded immediately, taking one of Felicity’s shaking hands. “We’re friends, and I am here for you. Just tell me what’s going on. Maybe it will help. Is it because of the match? I know that you are not happy about Oliver’s decision to join it although I have to say that he asked all of us if we thought that you would be okay with that. And we did think so.”

“It’s not about the match,” Felicity whispered. “Not really.”

Lyla nodded, waiting for Felicity to continue. Felicity closed her eyes once more. She couldn’t even look at Lyla when she admitted what she had done because Lyla would look at her the same way her reflection in the mirror had stared back at her lately.

“I told Oliver that we should get divorced.”

Her throat started burning once more, but Felicity swallowed the rising tears. Now was not the time to cry. Now was the time to be told off by Lyla for what she had done.

“Did you mean it?” Lyla asked.

“No,” Felicity answered, slowly opening her eyes. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw nothing but sympathy in her friend’s eyes. “I love Oliver.”

Again Lyla nodded. She took both of Felicity’s hand in hers and looked at her in reassurance. “Okay, tell me the whole story please. I guess you didn’t just say that out of the blue because that wouldn’t be you. I want to help you, but I can’t help you without knowing the full story.”

“I don’t really believe that I deserve to be helped at this point, Lyla,” Felicity admitted with a sad smile. “You should rather tell me what a bad person I am and how-“

“The fact that you think that of yourself only proves that you feel bad for what you have done apparently. And that means that you deserve help, whether you think so or not. So tell me what has happened, Felicity.”

Felicity breathed in deeply, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fill her eyes once more. But she nodded, knowing Lyla wouldn’t give up.

“Remember the night when Thea and I have been to the hospital because the police thought that the club tested drugs on its guests?” Lyla nodded. “The results of the blood tests revealed that I was pregnant. God, we were both so happy and for like two or three days everything was perfect.”

Felicity remembered how they had lain in bed together. Oliver’s head had rested on her hip as he had told stories to their unborn child while she had played with the hair at the nape of his neck, listening to his calming voice. When she had been pregnant with Emmeline, they had done that every single night, no matter how late it had been. Sometimes she had fallen asleep to the sound of his soft voice. After Emmeline had turned out to be a daddy’s girl, she had claimed that it had only been because his voice had left an imprint on their daughter.

“And then I suddenly felt this… rage inside of me built,” Felicity continued. “It was completely irrational because there was no reason, but I was just so mad because of nothing. I wanted to tell him because I knew I would most likely let it out on him even if it wasn’t his fault, but Oliver was so happy about the pregnancy. He made all those plans about what color to paint the nursery and where to put the furniture and I didn’t want to take that away from him. I didn’t want him to worry. He worries about so many other things already. So I smiled through the whole thing and swallowed all the anger down.”

“Oliver didn’t notice it?”

Felicity shook her head, hastily wiping away a tear that had managed to escape the corner of her eyes. “He couldn’t have noticed. This really wasn’t his fault.”

Lyla nodded, whispering, “Okay.”

“And then one evening I asked him about the detergent he should have bought and he had forgotten and told me to rest and I just… snapped,” Felicity said, remembering the suppressed rage that had suddenly broken free and consumed her. “I left to take a walk and clear my head. I knew it had been wrong to snap at him. Anyway, he followed me or found me or whatever. And he told me that I just needed a night off and that we should go home and do whatever I wanted to do and that just made me madder. I mean… Why did he have to say all those cute, right things?”

“Because he loves you,” Lyla offered with a soft smiled. “So you snapped again, I guess?”

Felicity nodded. “I felt so guilty because he was so perfect and I was so mean. So I went home and straight to bed. I told myself that I was going to apologize later and that this would be like it has been when I have been pregnant with Emmy, just a few bad hours spread over a few days. But Oliver came home and snuggled up to me in bed and apologized. I mean… really?! He apologizes after I have snapped at him twice that day?!”

“He loves you,” Lyla repeated.

“I moved away from his touch and… I don’t know. Somehow I created this idea in my head that it would be best for him if I distanced myself from him for the time of that bad mood. I thought I could spare him the pain of being my punching bag.”

“Felicity,” Lyla whispered with a sigh.

“I know!” Felicity said, two more tears escaping her eyes. “I know that it was wrong, but in that moment it seemed to be the best solution. I… probably couldn’t think clearly.”

Lyla nodded. “So you distanced yourself.”

“Yes,” Felicity confirmed, sniffling. “And then he wanted to go to this wresting show and surprise me and… I don’t know why, but all the anger I have swallowed the days before just broke out of me. I yelled at him because of the whole thing and he just wanted to surprise me and live his childhood dream. And I ruined that for him. I felt so guilty after it and thought that maybe I had to distance even more and… I banned him to the couch which I know was stupid. I could have put his bedding to one of the guest rooms which hadn’t been better of course, but would have at least spared him sleeping on the small couch, but I didn’t want to… You know, if he had started sleeping in another bedroom, it would have felt so much more… final. Like there was no return.”

Gently Lyla wiped a few more tears that were now falling more quickly from Felicity’s eyes away, and gave her hands a gentle squeeze, reassuring her to go on.

“It was all just getting worse. I avoided Oliver, he avoided me. I swear I could see how he was kind of scared to talk to me because he always thought he was making it worse when it was all my fault. I tried to talk to him about it, but I couldn’t. I don’t why. Maybe because I felt so guilty. Or maybe because I was too scared that I would just snap again. I don’t know…  
And then last week Oliver had finally had enough of my moods and has snapped back because I really deserved it, but instead of coming back to my senses I suddenly suggested that if being married to me is such a burden to him, we should get divorced. I didn’t mean to say it. I really didn’t. It was like I punched myself in the face by saying that.”

Felicity fell silent. She remembered the moment she had realized what she had been about to say so clearly. She remembered how her whole word had stopped spinning and her only thought had been ‘What have you done?’. She waited for Lyla to say something, but her friend just looked at her expectantly. Obviously she wanted to hear the rest of the story before she wanted to say something more.

“He left and I started crying,” Felicity explained. “I have tried to avoid him even more ever since. I just… I can’t look at him because I know if I do, I will see how disappointed he is in me and how much I have hurt him and I don’t think I am ready for that yet. I… I don’t know, but I feel like the only reason I have snapped almost only at him, is because I know that he is that kind of husband that doesn’t leave easily. I know it’s no excuse, but…”

“It’s an explanation,” Lyla agreed.

“Yeah,” Felicity whispered, more tears falling from her eyes. She felt her throat closing at the thought of what she would say next. “He will leave me, Lyla. After everything I have said and done, I am sure that he will leave me.”

She couldn’t get Oliver’s face out of her mind, the way he had looked at her when she had said the thing about the divorce. She had once told him that she didn’t want to be a woman that he loved, and he had looked like a kicked puppy after that. This time the expression on his face had been even worse. He had looked like she had… There was actually now suitable comparison to describe the pain in his eyes. He had certainly felt even worse.

When Felicity’s body started shaking from the sobs, Lyla hugged her friend tightly and rubbed her back like Felicity usually did when Emmy woke up crying in the middle of the night. It felt weirdly comforting, and Felicity closed her arms around Lyla’s waist and allowed her friend to give her the comfort she wasn’t sure she deserved.

She had done everything wrong. She had pushed Oliver so far away, hoping to save their relationship, but had made everything worse with it. And now she didn’t know how they were going to recover from that. Could a marriage actually recover once one had started to talk about divorce?

“Lyla, I don’t want to lose him,” she sobbed therefore, hoping her friend could give her any advice on what to do. She’d do anything to make it up to him. Anything. “Pregnancy is supposed to be the best time in a couple’s life and I am ruining it for him.”

“Okay, listen to me, Felicity,” Lyla almost whispered. “I know everyone tries to make women believe that just because they are pregnant, they have to be always happy. The truth is that hormones can pretty much mess up a person, and I think in your case we should take in consideration that you might have a slight form of prenatal depression. You have a stressful life and that can be a favoring factor.”

“But-“

“No buts, Felicity,” Lyla interrupted softly. “How are you feeling now?”

“Guilty,” Felicity sniffled against Lyla’s neck, “and scared. And miserable.”

“And angry?”

Felicity shook her head. The anger had faded. She had thought that as soon as that would happen, everything could turn back to normal, but she hadn’t known how much she could ruin her marriage in that short of time.

“Did you talk to your doctor about it?”

“I wanted to, but Oliver was there and I didn’t dare to complain in front of him. He is the one who’s getting snapped at about nothing. If there is someone who should complain, it’s him.”

“You know, the change of hormones can lead to a depression,” Lyla explained, ignoring Felicity’s statement about not deserving to complain, “and then all the guilt and… Talking will help, I think. And if it doesn’t, you should consider going to the doctor and tell him.”

Felicity nodded. Lyla was right. This couldn’t stay like this forever. She couldn’t continue feeling like this forever. And she certainly couldn’t expect Oliver to bear her moods forever.

“What did Oliver say to all of this?” Lyla asked as if reading Felicity’s mind. “Have you talked to him since that fight?”

Felicity shook her head. “But he said that he will fight for me.”

“That’s a good thing,” Lyla comforted her, stroking her hair. “Oliver isn’t going to leave you, but you should take a step towards him, honey, because otherwise Oliver will think that you are out.”

“But-“

Lyla loosened her grip on Felicity to look her in the eyes.

“Felicity, Oliver suffers just as much as you do.”

“More probably,” Felicity mumbled, but Lyla shook her head softly. Felicity wasn’t sure if she wanted to deny that Oliver suffered more or if she just wanted to make her shut up.

“Oliver suffers just as much as you do,” Lyla repeated. “And I think both of you need a sign that your marriage is not over because it isn’t. But you have pushed him away so long that I think he waits for you to take a step towards him. Felicity, I know this sounds hard, but sitting here and pitying yourself won’t bring him back, especially since you will only feel guiltier if he is the one to take another step towards you again. You have to do something.”

“What if he doesn’t want us anymore?”

“I don’t think Oliver would have said he will fight for you if he hadn’t meant it. And we should think about what we can do to make you feel better.”

“Nothing,” Felicity replied immediately. “I just want Oliver back.”

“Then you know what to do and if you need me, I’m here for you, okay? Just call me no matter the time.”

Felicity nodded. “Thank you, Lyla.”

“Do you want me to take Emmy with us? I’ll tell the others that you’re sick, so everyone will leave soon and you can be alone.”

Felicity nodded. “Thank you.”

Lyla leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Felicity’s cheek, hugging her once more. “Oliver loves you. You are not going to lose him. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

When Lyla left, Felicity lay down on the cool tiles of the bathroom, hugging her legs to her chest. Lyla was right. Pitying herself wasn’t going to get her Oliver back. She had to do something about it and she would do something about it. The thought made her heart race and her stomach cramp because she was so scared of what Oliver would say or do if she took a step, but she had to do it if she wanted to save her marriage. And she wanted to save it. She’d rather live guilty about what she had said and done with Oliver by her side, trying to make up for it for the rest of her life, than guilty about ruining her marriage without him.

She was going to get Oliver back. She wasn’t going to lose him.

 

When Oliver returned home, everything was dark already. He had expected that since it was almost midnight, but it still made him sigh.

Things between him and Felicity had been even weirder since their fight, but he couldn’t say if it was worse than before. Felicity was still avoiding him, even more than before, but he could see in her face that she was thinking about what had happened. He had thought if he should take a step towards her, but he didn’t want to push her. She probably felt bad enough already, and he didn’t want to make it worse.

So he stayed as patient as he had promised himself he would be. He let her avoid him and helped by being louder than usually when he was in the house, so Felicity always knew where he was and where she shouldn’t be then. He spent a lot of hours working at QC and in the Arrow Cave, had met Quentin twice to update him. He would stay patient and wait for a sign to do something about the tension between them.

He put his bag to the floor and groaned quietly when a pain flashed through his body. It was nothing compared to what he had been through already, but considering that his wife still didn’t talk to or look at him, Oliver thought he was allowed to pity himself a little for the physical pain in his back. He snuck to the freezer to get one of the cool packs they were keeping there and put it to his back. He couldn’t really reach the spots that hurt the worst, but the coolness still helped.

Maybe he should go upstairs and get Emmy, he thought. He had taken her from her crib to let her sleep on his chest rather often since he was sleeping on the couch. He had gotten so used to the sounds of Felicity’s even breathing that he just couldn’t handle sleeping in complete silence now. It made him nervous. He woke up in the middle of the night, reaching out for her body to make sure she was still breathing, but all he touched was empty air. It was terrifying and always took him a few seconds before he remembered where he was again.

“Need help?”

Oliver flinched at the closeness of her soft voice and hastily turned around. He almost expected Felicity to back away due to his quick movement, but she stood still, looking at him. Ever since they had started to drift apart Oliver caught himself unfocussed rather often. Thea and Roy had even criticized his missing focus in the field.

“Since when can you sneak up to me like that?” he asked before he could stop himself, but hastily pressed his lips together, wanting to apologize, but Felicity frowned and a small smile appeared on her face. It was barely visible, but it was there.

He felt like a thousand butterflies had occupied his stomach. It had been too long since she had smiled at him the last time.

“I coughed like three times on my way down here and almost fell down the stairs,” Felicity replied, shaking her head slightly. “Do you need help cooling your back?”

“Oh, no,” Oliver answered hastily, feeling overly excited about the fact that she talked to him. At the same time he remembered too well that she had said something about not wanting to have to take care of a hurt husband, and added, “It’s nothing.”

“You don’t cool your back because of nothing,” Felicity said, lifted her index finger and moved it in a circle to make him turn around, taking the cool pack from him at the same time.

Oliver could feel her gaze drifting up and down his back. He had only taken a short look in the mirror. He knew he had some marks of the fight on his body, but they weren’t permanent and looked kind of meaningless between the scars of his past. He bit his tongue to suppress a sigh when she put the cool pack to one of the wounds on his back.

“What are you doing up so late?” Oliver asked after a while. “Did Emmy wake up?”

“No, she’s not home. She’s sleeping at Lyla’s and John’s,” Felicity answered. “I… was craving some food… Midnight craving... very common thing for pregnant women.”

“Anything I should get you?” he offered softly. Did Felicity feel how quickly his heart was beating? He could barely hear her voice over the pounding in his ears.

“No, that’s not necessary, I guess. Besides, it’s already pretty late and I guess you’re tired, so…”

“If there is anything you want, I’ll go get it,” Oliver repeated his offer and hesitated before he added, “It’s my job. I’m your husband.”

Felicity didn’t answer immediately and he wondered if he had pushed too far. He quietly cursed himself already, when she cleared her throat and whispered, “You always will be.”

“As long as you want me to be,” he modified gently.

His blood was pounding in his ear while he waited for her to say something. He wanted her to know that he was still in this marriage. He had told her that already, but wasn’t sure if she had heard her since she could have been asleep. On the other hand he wanted her to know that if she really wanted end their marriage, he wouldn’t stand in the way of her happiness. He loved her and he wanted to fight for her, but not if she really wasn’t happy anymore, if she had fallen out of love with him and there was no way of getting her back. He knew the chances for that were rather low. Quentin had only clapped his shoulder and told him that he should stop worrying that much and imagining every scenario, but Oliver couldn’t stop.

“Like I said, you always will be.”

Oliver breathed in deeply. He wanted to say something more, but Felicity took the cool pack off his back and turned around. He thought she was going away, but instead she started cleaning the countertop. She had done that often when she hadn’t wanted to look at him lately.

“I um… I… I put your bedding back to bed. I guess it’s more comfortable for you to sleep there with your back.”

“You don’t have to-“ Oliver started, but Felicity shook her head, silencing him.

“It’s okay,” she said. “I’ll… I’ll go to bed. Night.”

“Night, Felicity.”

He watched her hurry away from him and took in a deep breath.

He had wanted a sign that she was still in this marriage, that she didn’t want to give up on them. That had been it for him. That had been the sign he had waited for. Maybe he was naive or something, but he felt in his bones that everything was going to get better from now.

He hadn’t missed the fact that she had come down here because of food, but hadn’t eaten anything. Maybe she had just pretended to want food to talk to him. Anyway, the fact that she had talked to him was a good sign.

Everything was going to be okay. He knew it.


	57. Monsters in my head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are almost through with the angst! If you survive the beginning of this chapter, you will already get a glimpse of the fluff that is going to come, even if all of this isn’t completely forgotten immediately, we will come to the better times again. :)
> 
> If you have any fluffy ideas, just tell me. :)

_“Come on! Move, move, move!”_

_On Diggle’s command, Felicity started running. She tried to ignore the loud gunshots that seemed to deafen her ears and just ran down the corridor Diggle had showed her. She felt the need to turn around and look whether he was following her, but she knew she wasn’t supposed to. Diggle had told her to just start running and not look back. So Felicity ran towards the door at the end of the corridor._

_She was halfway there when suddenly someone gripped her hand and pulled her to the side. Felicity almost expected to crush against the wall of the corridor, but only bumped against another body. Lifting her hands to fight, she turned around and sighed in relief when she saw Laurel in her Black Canary gear._

_“Are you okay?” Roy asked immediately, putting one hand under Felicity’s elbow as if he wanted to uphold her. Her fast breathing must have made him doubt in her ability to stand on her own._

_Felicity nodded, panting. “Where are Oliver and Thea?”_

_“The connection died, the comms don’t work” Roy explained, “but I am sure they are-“_

_When a door at the other end of the room suddenly opened, Roy pushed Felicity behind himself, shielding her smaller body with his. He had an arrow pointed at whoever had come in, but soon lowered his bow and took a step aside._

_“Felicity,” Oliver breathed, almost running towards her and scooping her up in his arms. “Are you okay?”_

_She nodded, wrapping her arms around him for a short second, but she soon remembered that they were still in a pretty dangerous situation, and eased back. Oliver let her back to the floor, but kept a protective arm around her._

_“Where is Diggle?” he asked._

_“Still out there,” Felicity explained. “He wanted me to run and started shooting. He said I shouldn’t turn back around and-“_

_Felicity stopped talking when again a door opened, the same she had come in through, and Diggle stepped into the room. His face was covered with sweat, his breathing was short and blood ran from a wound on his upper arm._

_“John!” Felicity exclaimed, hastily running towards him to take a closer look._

_“It’s just a graze,” he explained immediately, giving her a short smile that soon faded when he looked back up at the others. “We are caged. There is no way out.”_

_Everything on this mission had gone so terribly wrong. They had been supposed to sneak in and distract the armed guys to let Felicity work on their computers, but the bad guys had realized what was happening way too soon and started to fight back a lot harder than they had thought they would._

_“What are we going to do now? There are too many of them. We can’t fight all of them at the same time,” Roy said._

_Nobody said a word. Four masked vigilantes, one unmasked ex-soldier and an IT-girl and they still had trouble to fight the criminals of Starling City. How had they managed to take them down when it had been just Oliver, Diggle and her? Okay, this might not be the most prototypical kind of fight, but still._

_“We will give them what they want,” Oliver finally said out loud._

_Felicity turned around to ask him what he meant with that since the thing those guys wanted were, according to a video statement they had sent to one of the local news channels and that had been broadcasted almost nonstop on the news ever since, The Arrow’s death, but Oliver had his arms already wrapped around her, pulled her in and kissed her softly. There was something wrong. Felicity could taste it in the kiss and she could feel it deep in her soul. Something she didn’t knew or rather understood yet was wrong._

_But Oliver kept kissing her. His lips were gentle on hers before they opened with a sigh. His tongue moved over her lower lip, begging for entrance. The tip of her tongue made contact with his as soon as her lips opened up for him. His hands moved up her back to cup her cheeks. He angled her head, deepening the kiss. Then their lips parted for a short moment only for Oliver to kiss her once more, giving her a short peck. His forehead rested against hers, his hands moved back to her hips, holding her in place. Slowly his forehead moved away from hers. Felicity kept her eyes closed for two more heartbeats, savoring the moment, before she lifted her gaze._

_“No,” she said immediately when she saw the look he gave John over the top of her head. “Oliver, no, you won’t do that. You won’t sacrifice yourself to-“_

_“I love you, Felicity,” he whispered, kissing her shortly once more. “Don’t ever forget that.”_

_Before she got the chance to tell him that he couldn’t do that, that he couldn’t leave her and their family, that he couldn’t even leave the city, Oliver pushed Felicity into John’s arms._

_“What?! No! Let go! Let go! Let go!” she screamed, struggling against John’s strong hold, but John only grabbed her forearms tightly and encaged her between his arms and his chest. She kicked, threw her head around and screamed. She couldn’t remember ever screaming like this, couldn’t remember ever fighting this hard._

_But it had no point. John held her too tightly. He didn’t even have to try too hard to keep her from escaping his hold. He was so much stronger than her. He held her while Oliver kissed Thea’s forehead. Felicity barely saw it due to the wild movements of her head, but she caught one or two glimpses._

_“Oliver! Oliver! Let me go! Oliver, don’t! No! Oliver!”_

_Somehow she managed to free one arm from John’s grip. She blindly started moving it behind her, hoping to hit John’s face and get him to let her down. Her fingers hit his face two or three times indeed, but John still didn’t let go. His free hand made attempts to catch her arm, but somehow she managed to avoid getting caught. When she felt like attacking his face didn’t do any good she dug her nails deeply into the skin of John’s other arm that still hold hers, leaving long scratches along his forearm, but that only gave John the chance to grab her arm again. Her arms hurt where Diggle held them, but she barely felt the pain. She just new, rationally, that it had to be there. Neither could she hear her own screams anymore. It was as if she was numb and blind and deaf to anything but Oliver._

_“Don’t go! No! Oliver! Oliver! Don’t go! Don’t leave me!”_

_When he started to move towards the door, Felicity felt like the world slowed down. Everything slowed down. She saw her legs kicking strongly, but slowly. She knew she was still screaming because she felt her lips move. But Oliver kept walking to the door. The door knob in his hand, he turned around, looking right at her. Even through the blur of tears she could see the sad but determined expression in his face, and she could see that his lips moved to say something, but she didn’t hear it._

_He opened the door and the world started spinning in its original pace again. She kept screaming for John to let her go, for Oliver to stay and not leave her. She kept kicking and struggling against John’s hold, but Oliver stepped out of the door and-_

 

Oliver closed the front door behind him and took a look around. Everything was dark and silent. Sighing, he put his keys in the small bowl on the table next to the door and headed right to the stairs. He had wanted to be home so much earlier, but something had come up in the Arrow Cave and he had to cancel the dinner with Felicity. He had been excited about that dinner all day.

They were slowly recovering from whatever had been going on with them for weeks. Felicity was still tense around him which was why he let her take the complete lead. He let her decide if she wanted to talk and what she wanted to talk about. He let her decide what they were doing. And most importantly, he let her decide whether there were touches or not. Within the last few days the number and intimacy of touches had increased. They had developed from no touches at all to small, almost accidental touches and finally to actual touches.

This morning Felicity had even adjusted his already perfectly knotted tie. She had moved her hands over his shoulders to smooth out the invisible creases in his suit jacket. And then she had straightened onto her tiptoes to press a gentle kiss to his cheek. Oliver still couldn’t stop smiling when he thought about it. It had only been a short kiss, but it had been a kiss, the first kiss this year. He hadn’t kissed her since the morning of December 8. That had been the same day she had first snapped at him, 43 days without kissing, 42 days without today.

Although things between them were slowly becoming better, they still hadn’t talked about what had happened. Part of Oliver wanted to avoid the topic and just act like nothing had ever happened. He feared that everything they were rebuilding now could fall apart if they talked about it, but he knew that they had to talk about it sooner or later. He didn’t expect Felicity to apologize, didn’t even really want it. What he wanted, though, was to understand her, to get to know what had happened that they had been to the point of talking about divorce. He wanted to learn what he might have done wrong. If he had anything done wrong. He had become pretty good at reflecting his behavior, so he had played everything that had happened over and over again like a movie, but he still hadn’t found anything in his memory that had made him deserve that. At least he hadn’t done anything lately. He had really terrible karma, so maybe this had been his punishment for that.

But they wouldn’t discuss any of that tonight, he thought while brushing his teeth. All he wanted to do tonight was sneaking into bed, watching Felicity sleep for a few minutes and then fall asleep himself.

He put his pullover and his jeans over the rim of the bathtub and left the bathroom in only his shirt and boxers. He had decided to not take his shirt off in bed until Felicity and he were a little better. It seemed weirdly inappropriate to let her sleep next to his half-naked body as long as she was barely comfortable next to him when he was clothed.

Oliver made a detour to Emmeline’s room, taking a short look in the crib. He smiled when he saw her sleeping in one of those weird positions Felicity sometimes slept in, too. She was rather crouching than lying in bed. Her legs were under her stomach, her head rested on the pink stuffed giraffe she loved so much lately. Even in her sleep she moved the pacifier in and out of her mouth slightly. Oliver pressed a quick kiss to her head and left.

When he quietly opened the door to his and Felicity’s bedroom, he immediately knew that something was wrong. Felicity was usually one of those people who didn’t move at all once they were asleep; at least she had been for as long as she hadn’t been heavily pregnant and Emmy hadn’t been too young to sleep through the night. Anytime but then she just lay in bed in one of those strange positions that should make it impossible to sleep, most of the times she even managed to occupy the whole bed. So when Oliver entered the bedroom and heard Felicity’s small whimpers, he immediately knew something was wrong.

He hastily went to the bed and crawled onto the mattress. He had his hands reached out for her already when he remembered that touching her might not be the best idea. Usually he would pull her closer and embrace her in his arms, comforting her with his warmth. It was the same thing she did when he had nightmares which happened to him so much more often than it did to her, luckily. Oliver really didn’t want her to go through nightmares. But touching her as long as they weren’t completely okay seemed wrong.

“Felicity?” he whispered, but she didn’t react, so he said her name again, a little bit louder this time. “Felicity?”

She still whimpered. Her body was shivering, her head turning from one side to the other restlessly. Even in the dark he could see the pain in her face. Biting his tongue, he put his hand to her hip and rubbed it with the palm of his hand, shaking her body slightly in the hope to wake her up.

“Felicity? Baby, you’re having a nightmare. Wake up,” he said out loud into the dark.

And indeed her whimpers lapsed into silence. He let his hand rest against her hip, enjoying the warmth of her body underneath the palm of his hand. His thumb kept moving over the small piece of uncovered skin between her top and her panties. He told himself that all he wanted to do was make sure that she didn’t fall back into her nightmare, but he knew in the back of his mind that he needed this little touch right now. He needed to know that she was okay.

Just when he was about to pull his hand back and try to find some sleep himself, the whimperes started again. Oliver frowned and started shaking her body once more, a little more strongly this time. Was it even allowed to do that to a pregnant woman? Or was shaking a pregnant woman the same as shaking a baby?

“No, no you… you won’t…”

Screw it, Oliver thought. If Felicity backed off again he would accept it, but he wasn’t going to accept that she was shaking and whimpering in her sleep. So he moved closer to her carefully until her back rested against his chest. He wanted to whisper into her ear that everything was going to be okay.

“What?! No! Let go! Let go! Let go!” she suddenly screamed, the volume of her voice ripping through the nightly silence brutally. Her arms and legs started moving wildly, hitting and kicking like she was fighting an enemy.

Oliver acted instantly. He wrapped his arms around Felicity’s small body tightly, holding onto her forearms to stop them from moving and prevent her from hurting herself. Her whole body was moving to get away from him, but he couldn’t let her go. She was going to fall out of bed, hit herself or do anything else that could hurt her or their baby. He couldn’t let that happen. So he held onto her and kept saying loudly, “Felicity, wake up. It’s just a nightmare. I am here. Wake up. I am here.”

She was so caught in whatever nightmare she had that his voice didn’t seem to get through to her. He managed to repeat his calming words three times before he couldn’t bear her screams any longer. Tightening his hold on her, he pulled her closer to his own body and dragged her off the bed. He started moving her to the bathroom en suit, lovely called the sex-bathroom, but had trouble to keep her in his arms at the same time since she was still fighting wildly. He hadn’t known how much strength was still in her till this moment.

“Oliver! Oliver! Let me go! Oliver, don’t! No! Oliver!”

For a second he thought that she had woken up and wasn’t fighting her nightmare any longer, but was fighting him instead. The shock of hearing his name as a heartbreaking screech from her lips made him loosen his hold on her. Immediately she pulled one arm from his grip and started moving it around fiercely. She hit his face twice, but Oliver started doubting that she was awake. He lifted her from the floor once more and carried her into the bathroom where he switched on the light.

She wasn’t awake. Her eyes were closed, her whole face showing unbearable pain. There were tears streaming down her cheeks. And he could still feel her body trembling although she hadn’t stopped moving. Whatever she was going through in her dream, he needed to get her out of that.

Oliver groaned when the nails of her free left hand dug into the skin of his right forearm, trying to make him loose his grip on her other arm. Her nails were leaving red scratched where they moved over his skin and a few drops of blood fell from his arms. He used the less wild movements of her hand to catch her forearm and bring it back to her chest. He was surprised that she didn’t wake up from the force of his hold. Her skin was white where his fingers held her. He was sure that his grip was going to leave bruises, but there was no other possibility to keep her from hurting herself.

“Don’t go! No! Oliver! Oliver! Don’t go! Don’t leave me!” she screamed, and it broke his heart.

He opened the glass door to the shower and dragged Felicity in. Oliver carefully sat down on the floor of the shower, pulling Felicity onto his lap. Felicity was still kicking fiercely and if she didn’t stop soon, she would probably destroy the glass of the shower wall and hurt herself. So he encaged her legs between his and pressed them down to the floor. He took both of her arms in one hand now, barely able to hold her, but he needed his hand free. Hastily he leaned forward and turned the shower on.

Her eyes snapped open as soon as the cold water splashed down on him. She started to look around and tried to orientate herself. She was gasping for breath desperately between the heavy pants that made her whole body tremble. Her back was arching away from his chest, and she made a screeching sound of discomfort, but Oliver didn’t let her go. He still held her close and whispered words of comfort and reassurance in her ear, promising her that he was there and wouldn’t leave. It didn’t seem like she heard him, but he still had to say them. When she made strange, gurgling sounds he carefully leaned forward to give her the chance to vomit, but she only gagged a few times before her head fell back. She seemed exhausted and tired.

“You’re okay,” he whispered. “Everything’s okay. I am here.”

Her head slowly turned around, and her eyes found his. She was almost staring at him, but Oliver saw the recognition in them. He couldn’t say if she was okay, but at least she seemed better than she had before even if she was soaking wet from the water that still splashed down on both of them.

“Hi,” he whispered gently. “You’re okay. You’re home. We’re home.”

When she started struggling this time, he slowly let go of her forearms and moved his legs away to give her all freedom she needed to move the way she wanted. He expected her to move away from him, but she stayed exactly where she rested on top of him while Oliver turned off the shower. As soon as he leaned back against the cool tiles of the shower again, Felicity moved around, pressing her wet chest against his. She slid her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips, wrapping herself around him tightly. She hid her face in the juncture of his neck and shoulder and cried. Oliver wrapped his arms around her tightly, securing her trembling body to his chest.

“Everything is okay,” he whispered against her hair, gently rocking her back and forth in his arms while rubbing her back comfortingly. “Everything is alright. I am here.”

“And you… you… you won’t…” she sobbed against his neck. “You… you won’t leave?”

“Never,” he promised. “I am never going to leave you. Ever. I promise.”

“Never?” she asked.

“Never,” he repeated with certain voice.

“Even if I act like a psychotic bitch?”

“Hey, nobody is allowed to talk about my wife like that.”

He kept rubbing her back while she cried some more. For the first time in like forever he got the chance to breathe her in. She smelled even better than he had been able to remember during the time they had been apart.

When the door opened Oliver turned his head to find their daughter standing in the doorframe. She held her pink giraffe pressed to her chest, and looked nosily into the bathroom. Since she was able to climb out of her bed, which she had learned pretty early, Emmeline had developed the habit of just climbing out whenever she couldn’t sleep or something had woken her. Sometimes Oliver and Felicity found her playing in their bedroom when they went to sleep although she had been supposed to be in bed for hours. They had started to use the baby monitors with the screen again then.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Oliver said softly, and immediately Felicity’s sobs were becoming quieter. She was still crying. He could feel the tears running down his neck and felt her body trembling on top of his, but she tried to hide it as good as possible from their daughter.

“Mommy okay?” she asked.

“Mommy just had a nightmare. It’s nothing,” Oliver explained.

“Monsters under bed?”

“No, I don’t think so, but I will go check later. Don’t you want to go back to bed?”

Emmeline shook her head and said, “I go look.”

She glanced at the stuffed animal in her hand, ran over to the shower and lifted one of Felicity’s hands from Oliver’s shirt to put the stuffed animal under it. It warmed not only Oliver’s heart, but his whole body. Emmeline wasn’t even two years old and she was already one of the most caring people he knew.

“Thank you, Emmy. That’s really nice of you,” he said, and Emmeline smiled happily before she ran out of the door and called for all the monsters to disappear because they were making her mommy scared. He had no idea what he had done to deserve a daughter like her. He had probably married the right woman.

When a slightly louder sob escaped Felicity’s lips, he tightened his hold on her, and she cried some more before she whispered a barely audible “Sorry” against his skin.

“There is nothing you have to apologize for,” Oliver whispered. “I know what it’s like to have nightmares. They just happen. It’s over now. You’re home and safe. Just take the time you need to calm down. I’m here. I’m not letting you go.”

Felicity stayed like she was, clinging to him, for a few heartbeats more before she moved back, just enough to be able to look at Oliver. Her eyes were red and puffy, and strains of wet hair were stuck to her face. He gently wiped them away while Felicity took in a sniffling but deep breath.

“Not just for that, Oliver,” she whispered, a few more tears falling from her eyes.

He let the sound of his name coming from her lips wash over him and heal the little cracks his heart had taken from all the times she had shut him out lately. Even in the little more than a week they had worked on going back to normal again, Felicity hadn’t said his name. He had wondered what the reason behind it had been. Sometimes he had thought she was going to say it and she had stopped herself from it, but he couldn’t say for sure. It had actually felt like she had tried to punish herself by not saying his name.

“There is nothing you have to apologize for, Felicity,” he repeated honestly. “Nothing.”

“But I pushed you away for so long and I snapped at you all the time and I said- I said-“

When she started sobbing again, Oliver gently put a hand to the back of her head to make it rest at his shoulder once more.

“It’s okay,” he said and, almost to his own surprise, he meant it.

All the time he had just though that everything was going to be okay, once she was fully going to let him back in, but right now, with her trembling body in his arms, he really meant it. Maybe it was because it was the first time he had said it out loud or maybe it was because she looked so terribly miserable and guilty, but… he meant it. It was okay. He didn’t need time to slowly go back to normal. Everything that had happened seemed kind of forgotten to him because Felicity was back and that was all that really mattered.

“We’re okay,” he whispered.

Once again Felicity moved back slightly to look at him. The hand, that still gripped his shirt tightly, slowly let go of the fabric to cup Oliver’s cheek. He leaned into her touch immediately, his arms still wrapped around her body.

“I love you,” she whispered before leaning forward and pressing her lips to his.

The kiss was a desperate, but still gentle one. Felicity’s lips moved almost fiercely over his, put never pressed too hard. Her tongue dominated his, but was still soft. Right before their lips parted again, her teeth sank into his bottom lip. She rested her head against his shoulder once more, just in time to hide her screwed up face from Emmeline once more.

“No monsters,” the little girl said before climbing to her parents into the shower and hugging her mother from behind. “No cry, Mommy.”

Oliver heard Felicity take in one more sniffling breath before she wiped the tears away and turned her head to look at Emmy.

“No more tears,” she promised with a small smile that didn’t really reach her eyes. “Let’s all go to bed.”

Before Felicity or Emmeline could move, Oliver was already starting to stand up, both of them still in his arms. Felicity screeched while Emmeline called, “Braggart!” and Oliver stood still, looking at his daughter over Felicity’s shoulder.

“She picked it up from Roy and Sara explained to her what it means.”

“Remember me to hit Roy,” Oliver said, shaking his head before moving to the bedroom where he gently put his two loved ones to the mattress. “Emmy, can you go back to the bathroom and get us some towels?”

Nodding, the girl jumped from the bed and ran into the bathroom. Felicity breathed in deeply once more and lowered her upper body to the mattress. She felt weak after all the crying. It had given her inner strength or whatever to call that. She felt way better than a few hours ago, but her body felt like it had no energy left. She could just fall asleep the way she was lying there.

When Emmy returned with the towels, Oliver got rid of his clothes except for his black boxers and dried himself. He disappeared into the dressing room for a moment. When he returned in a dry shirt, he put his hoody he had brought with him on the bed next to Felicity and gently grabbed her hands to pull her into a sitting position. She groaned, already half-asleep, but it only made him smile.

“You’re gonna get sick if we don’t change you,” he said before he started to take off her top and then toweled her. He shortly thought about removing her panties and changing them, too, but he didn’t think that that was the right time for that. So he just made sure that most of the wetness had dried before he helped her put on the hoody and then gently pushed her further onto the bed. She was asleep before her head rested on the pillow.

“Come on, Emmy, you can sleep here tonight,” he whispered, and immediately Emmy crawled onto the bed, resting her head right next to Felicity’s breast. Even though she was sleeping Felicity slipped an arm around her daughter to pull her closer. She still held the stuffed giraffe Emmy had given her in her hand.

Oliver stood still and just watched the two of them snuggled up to each other before he crawled under the blanked himself. He moved as close to both of them as possible and put one arm around both of them, his hand resting on the small of Felicity’s back. He was tired, but all the adrenalin from what had happened when he had come home and all the other hormones he couldn’t name that had been set free when he had realized that Felicity was back, were keeping him awake.

He had no idea how long he had just stare at Felicity when she suddenly opened her eyes. Even in the dark he could see that she was looking right back at him.

“Hi,” he whispered.

“Hi,” she whispered back and leaned towards him.

Their lips met halfway for a lingering kiss. Even when their lips parted, their foreheads stayed together. Their breaths ghosted over each other’s face.

“I think we should talk about what happened,” Felicity whispered.

“We don’t have to do it now unless you really want to.”

“I really want to,” Felicity whispered back. “I think if I wait much longer, I might go insane.”

“So tell me,” Oliver answered quietly and kissed the tip of her nose shortly. “I’ll listen.”

And he did listen. Protected by the dark and quiet of the night, she told him everything she had told Lyla a week ago. She told him about how she hadn’t wanted to destroy his happiness, which had led her to pushing him away until she had been caught in a vicious circle of anger and guilt that had made her only push him further away. She told him how she hadn’t meant to bring up divorce and how she hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes after that because she had been too scared that she had ruined their marriage even if he had told her that he would fight for her. She told him about the horrible nightmare of losing him and that she knew now more than ever that she could never live without him and that she wanted to do everything he asked her to do if he just stayed with her and gave their marriage another try. Oliver didn’t say a word while she was speaking. He just nodded into the dark and gave her body comfort by rubbing her back whenever he heard the tears in her voice.

“Do you think we will get past this?” Felicity asked and he could hear that she was crying once more.

“Of course we will,” Oliver replied without hesitation, cupping her cheek that was wet with tears. “I love you. Nothing is going to change that. We will figure all of this out. I just… I have question if you don’t mind.”

“You can ask me anything.”

“Was all of this caused by the hormones or was it something else? Was there something else bothering you or did I do-“

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Felicity interrupted him softly. “You were actually annoyingly perfect.”

“I think I have never been criticized for that and I have been criticized a lot in my life,” he whispered, a smile that couldn’t be seen in the dark forming on his lips.

“Lyla thinks,” Felicity said after a while, making a pause to take a deep breath, “that I might suffer from depression.”

Oliver’s heart stopped beating for a moment. He had known in the depth of his soul that it couldn’t have been just the hormones. He had known that there had had to be other reasons for her unlikely behavior. But a depression? Felicity was a ray of sunshine, happy was her normal. That she of all people should suffer from a depression just wasn’t fair. What other people felt as their normal, daily mood was kind of bad mood for Felicity already. A depression for her must have been torture.

“Have you been to a doctor?”

“No.”

“Then we will call him tomorrow.”

“But-“

Oliver silenced her objection with a kiss to her lips before he whispered a pleading “Please, Felicity”.

“Are you coming with me?” she asked, her voice sounding weak.

“Only if you want me to.”

“Yes, please.”

“Then I’ll take the day off and come with you,” he promised, kissing her once more. “It’s late. The night was pretty exciting. You should rest now.”

“Okay,” Felicity sighed, lowering her face a little, so her lips rested against her daughter’s hair.

Oliver slid a little closer to both of them before he closed his eyes and tried to relax. He was just about to drift off to sleep when he remembered something important he needed to get off his soul.

“Felicity, are you still awake?” he whispered.

“Yes. Why?” she whispered back.

“I forgot to tell you something.”

“And that is?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“And you owe me at least 350 kisses.”

“350? Why 350?”

“We didn’t kiss for 43 days, 42 actually since we’ve kissed today, so I will not count that day,” he started. “Those 42 days have been twelve days of weekend and 30 weekdays. On a weekday we normally kiss at least six times – after I’ve woken you up, right after you come downstairs, before I go to work, right after I come back from work, as soon as Emmy is in bed and when we lie down in bed. That means we missed 180 weekday-kisses. At a normal weekend day we kiss at least ten times –after I wake you up, after you come downstairs, when we’ve finished breakfast, before we sit down to lunch, when we have put Emmy down for her nap, when we have to get Emmy back from her nap, after we’ve finished dinner, when we’ve put Emmy to bed, when we snuggle up on the couch and when we lie in bed. The 120 kisses we missed on the weekends and the 180 kisses we missed during the weeks make a total of 300 kisses we’ve missed. Then we have been under the mistletoe ten times during Christmas, I’ve kept count of that, and we usually kiss a lot more those days like after we have decorated the tree and after each of the 20 presents Emmy opened. Oh, and we missed the New Year’s kiss and the at least kisses I get to calm down during the fireworks, so at least 42 kisses more. Rounded up, that makes 50 kisses and we get to a total of 350 missed kisses.”

Felicity didn’t say a word. Oliver shortly wondered if he had pushed too far with that or if she had fallen back asleep, but soon she moved her lips over his to kiss him gently.

“I love you,” she whispered, kissing him once more.

“I love you, too.”

“Your calculation isn’t bad for someone who got a D in algebra.”

Oliver chuckled quietly, but Felicity barely heard it since she was already falling asleep.

 

* * *

**Time for a Story Special - Extra scene - Felicity tells Oliver what has been going on with her  
**

Oliver had no idea how long he had just stared at Felicity and Emmeline, who were lying wrapped in each other’s arms right next to him in bed, when Felicity suddenly opened her eyes. Even in the dark he could see that she was looking right back at him.

“Hi,” he whispered.

“Hi,” she whispered back and leaned towards him.

Their lips met halfway for a lingering kiss. Even when their lips parted, their foreheads stayed together. Their breaths ghosted over each other’s face.

“I think we should talk about what happened,” Felicity whispered.

“We don’t have to do it now unless you really want to.”

The terrible nightmare she had been caught in earlier this night must have been exhausting for her. She should rest. There was no pressure in telling him what had been going on with her lately, why she had pushed him away and why she had snapped at him whenever they had talked. She just needed to get better.

“I really want to,” Felicity whispered back. “I think if I wait much longer, I might go insane.”

“So tell me,” Oliver answered quietly and kissed the tip of her nose shortly. “I’ll listen.”

For a while she didn’t say anything, but Oliver could almost hear her thinking. His eyes were used to the dark now, so he could see at least a little bit more of her face, but it wasn’t enough to say if she cried or anything. His hand that still rested on the small of her back felt the even rising and falling of her upper body. She seemed to breathe evenly, so she probably didn’t cry.

“I didn’t…” she started suddenly, but stopped to take another deep breath. “I didn’t mean to… Frack, why is that so hard?”

“Take your time,” Oliver said gently, his hand rubbing the small of her back gently. He felt the muscles of her back tense when his fingers moved a little bit low, so he put his hand back to where it had rested before.

Felicity tightened her hold on Emmeline, pressing her daughter’s small body closer to her chest. Even in her sleep Emmy snuggled up closer to her mother, making some comfortable sounds. Her little fist held onto the neckline of the hoody Oliver had helped Felicity put on before. It had been hard enough to talk to Lyla about this and her friend hadn’t even had to suffer through everything Felicity had done lately. She hadn’t snapped at Lyla angrily whenever she had talked to her. She hadn’t shut Lyla out of her life completely. And she hadn’t told Lyla that she wanted to get divorced. 

“I didn’t want to destroy your happiness,” she finally said very quickly and so quietly that it was barely audible, even in the quiet of the night. 

Oliver wanted to hug her close and tell her that she hadn’t destroyed his happiness because she hadn’t. Yes, he had been sad, he was still worried, but Felicity and Emmeline were his happiness. He could feel that Felicity wasn’t ready to listen to what he had to say about this yet, though. She needed to get everything that burdened her off her chest. So he just rubbed her back, careful not to touch her too intimately. 

“I… I didn’t want to… hurt you,” she continued after a while, “so… I… I pushed you away.”

He could hear how hard it was for her to say that, but he couldn’t help himself, he had to ask, “What do you mean?”

Felicity started rubbing Emmeline’s back, mimicking the movements of Oliver’s hand on her back. She tried to think about the right words to explain what she meant. It really wasn’t easy to talk to him about it. It wasn’t easy talking about it at all.

“I knew that something was wrong,” she finally whispered. “Something was wrong with me and… I knew I let it out on you the night you forgot the detergent. So I… I thought it was better to distance myself, you know? When we didn’t talk, I couldn’t hurt you.”

She had pushed him away to protect him. Oliver’s heart skipped a beat. All he had wanted was to be there for her. All she had wanted apparently had been to protect him from her moods. It was something they should definitely talk about at some point in the near future. Oliver never wanted to be saved from whatever Felicity felt burdened with. He loved her. He should be allowed to help her get though whatever was bothering her. How often had she helped her? Even before they had been together, he had always known that she was there when he needed someone to talk her. He had always wanted to give her something back for that.

“But I felt guilty for shutting you out. So I talked to you, but then I got angry again and snapped and I pushed you even more away to make sure that I… wouldn’t… hurt you too much,” she said that quickly that Oliver needed a second to understand her words.

He could feel that whatever she wanted to say next was even harder for her. Her body was trembling now, she sniffled and Oliver could feel her squirming under his hand on her back, so he carefully pulled his hand back and rested it on the back of Emmeline’s head.

“About the… the di-” she started, taking a deep breath to gather her courage to say the horrible word out loud. “I didn’t mean to… I didn’t want to… Frack!”

“Frack,” Emmeline mumbled in her sleep, and Oliver couldn’t help but chuckle. If he looked closely he could almost see a small smile on Felicity’s face, but he wasn’t sure, though. Their daughter was learning more and more curse words, it seemed.

“Oliver,” Felicity said quietly, “I don’t want to get divorced.”

“I know that,” he said immediately. “Don’t worry about that. It was the heat of the moment.”

“I just… I couldn’t… I couldn’t look you in the eyes after what I said,” she whispered into the dark, the tears now audible in her voice. “I was so scared that I… ruined… our marriage. I know you said you would fight for me, but… still.”

Oliver nodded into the dark. She had been scared that she had pushed him too far away, just like he had been scared that he would lose Felicity. He hadn’t even known how much she had suffered till now. He had always wondered how he had survived so long without her, but how had she managed it? Everything she had said tonight made him only feel sorrier for her. And it made him angry that he couldn’t have helped her.

“Lyla told me to… take a step towards you,” she continued after a while. “So I did. I tried to… go back to… normal, I guess. But then tonight I had this-”

She sobbed, and Oliver put his hand back to the small of her back. He felt her relax into his touch. There wasn’t much comfort he could offer her, but this he could give her.

“I’m here,” he whispered, hesitatingly moving forward to press a kiss to her forehead, but he let her close the last bit of distance to make sure she was okay with the kiss. Her forehead felt a little warmer than usually. The stress had probably caused a slight fever. “It’s okay.”

“You… sacrificed yourself during a mission,” Felicity sobbed. “You… you just… you kissed me and then you… you pushed me into Diggle’s arms and… you just walked away.”

Felicity could hear Emmeline making some sound in her sleep. It seemed like she was on the edge to waking up again. So she hastily pressed a kiss to her daughter’s hair and took a deep breath to silence the sobs. 

“Hey,” Oliver whispered meanwhile, rubbing her back once more, “I wouldn’t sacrifice myself. Not anymore. I would never give up on this life we have without a fight.”

“Really?” she asked, her voice sounding weak. 

“Really,” he promised with determined voice. “Besides, you don’t really think John would let me do something that stupid, do you? He would help you beat me up instead of holding you.”

He smiled in relief when Felicity chuckled quietly. It was only a short moment, but it was there. 

“I know that… what I did to you… is inexcusable. I know that, but… I could never live without you. And I will do everything you ask me to do… to… I will do whatever you want… if you forgive me and let us try again. I don’t want to lose you.”

“You are not going to lose me,” Oliver promised, feeling the weight that had been put around his heart since everything had started easing. 

Felicity was just as much in this marriage as he was. It was going to be okay. Everything was going to be okay. He loved her and she loved him. And that was all that really mattered. He could work with that.

“Do you think we will get past this?” Felicity asked and he could hear that she was crying once more.

“Of course we will,” Oliver replied without hesitation, cupping her cheek that was wet with tears. “I love you. Nothing is going to change that. We will figure all of this out. I just… I have question if you don’t mind.”

“You can ask me anything.”

“Was all of this caused by the hormones or was it something else? Was there something else bothering you or did I do-“

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Felicity interrupted him softly. “You were actually annoyingly perfect.”

“I think I have never been criticized for that and I have been criticized a lot in my life,” he whispered, a smile that couldn’t be seen in the dark forming on his lips.

“Lyla thinks,” Felicity said after a while, making a pause to take a deep breath, “that I might suffer from depression.”

Oliver’s heart stopped beating for a moment. He had known in the depth of his soul that it couldn’t have been just the hormones. He had known that there had had to be other reasons for her unlikely behavior. But a depression? Felicity was a ray of sunshine, happy was her normal. That she of all people should suffer from a depression just wasn’t fair. What other people felt as their normal, daily mood was kind of bad mood for Felicity already. A depression for her must have been torture.

“Have you been to a doctor?”

“No.”

“Then we will call him tomorrow.”

“But-“

Oliver silenced her objection with a kiss to her lips before he whispered a pleading “Please, Felicity”.

“Are you coming with me?” she asked, her voice sounding weak.

“Only if you want me to.”

“Yes, please.”

“Then I’ll take the day off and come with you,” he promised, kissing her once more. “It’s late. The night was pretty exciting. You should rest now.”

“Okay,” Felicity sighed, lowering her face a little, so her lips rested against her daughter’s hair.

Oliver slid a little closer to both of them before he closed his eyes and tried to relax. He was just about to drift off to sleep, knowing that everything was going to be okay.

 


	58. Back to normal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all I wanted to thank all of you for all the support and nice words during the angsty times. I think I wouldn't have been that happy with the outcame of those last chapters if it wasn't for all of you. So thank you for reading, liking, commenting, sending me fanpost and so on. It is very appreciated.
> 
> This chapter and the next one might be a little messy because we are actually over with the angst, but of course everything that happened isn't completely forgotten. It isn't forgotten after those two chapters either, but it will get easier then...

Back to normal. If Felicity had to find a name for this week, this would be it. Back to normal. After her breakdown at the end of last week, Oliver and she had started working out their issues even harder than before. Both of them were really giving their bests to go, well, back to normal, to the way their life had been before Felicity’s depression had made them drift apart. Of course they couldn’t just act like nothing had ever happened. Felicity had a serious health issue that they needed to take care of.

Felicity had done some research and found out that her symptoms – the sadness, the anger, the guilt, the shutting others out – were textbook signs of depression. Prenatal depression was actually the same as a normal depression, except for that it only occurred during and right after pregnancy. One in ten women suffered from this disease, most of them during the first or last trimester of pregnancy and once you had suffered from it during pregnancy, chances were high that you would experience it after birth again.

So their first stop on the road to reconnect with their life before their fight had been her doctor. He had run a few tests, basically asking Felicity a lot of questions, and had then stated that she indeed probably suffered from a slight depression. Probably – that word had been terribly unsatisfying for Oliver, but truth was that there weren’t any tests that could make 100% sure that someone really suffered from a psychiatric syndrome like that. According to the doctor, it was a good sign that Felicity already felt better. It was also a good sign that she hadn’t thought about suicide and didn’t resent her baby. It was an even better sign that the baby hadn’t taken any damages because often the baby didn’t develop correctly or at least not in time when the mother suffered from depression during pregnancy.

The doctor had given them three ways to continue.  
First, he could prescribe Felicity some antidepressant. Felicity had rejected that. She knew from her researches that those medicaments hadn’t shown any negative effect on the unborn babies in the past, but she also knew that there hadn’t been any long-term studies because it was unethical to test medicaments on pregnant women. So a no to the medicaments.  
Second, he could recommend her some good psychotherapist. Originally, his had been supposed to be an addition to the medicaments, but since she didn’t want to take any of them, she could also do only the psychotherapy of course. This second option had been both, Oliver’s and the doctor’s, favored option, but again Felicity had refused. Again. How had Oliver thought she would be able to talk to a therapist about her life? It wasn’t like she could just tell everybody about their secret vigilante work. Oliver had answered later that she could go to the same therapist Carrie Cutter had been to, but Felicity had still refused.  
That had let them to option number three. They wouldn’t do anything for now, but Felicity and Oliver had to promise to keep a careful eye on her moods and come back as soon as something changed back to the worse.

Oliver hadn’t been too happy with that. They had had a long discussion about what to do when they had been back home. They had discussed their further steps with their arms wrapped around each other, keeping each other close. None of them had been ready for anything else.

So Oliver had suggested that he was going to hang up his hood, at least for the duration of the pregnancy. If stress had been a factor that had led to the development of her depression, then he would take care that she would have less stress. But Felicity hadn’t wanted that, which had made Oliver kind of clueless about what to do. More than anything he had wanted to be there for her and giving up his nightly job seemed like the best possibility to do so. Since Felicity had said again and again that Oliver giving up on the city just wasn’t acceptable, they had done the only possible thing left.  
They had called Lyla and asked her to kind of be Felicity’s psychotherapist. And Lyla, being the good and caring friend that she was, had of course accepted. So now she came over twice a week to spend time with Felicity and was kind of working as an emergency service for whenever Felicity felt bad. Felicity hadn’t needed that service yet, but Lyla had made pretty clear that Felicity shouldn’t hesitate to call her whenever she was in need of a friend.

Oliver had taken the whole week off, and didn’t plan on going back to work before the beginning of the next week. He enjoyed spending his time with his family again too much. Besides, Felicity had been a little clingy after her breakdown, and he hadn’t been able to leave her alone, hadn’t even wanted to leave her alone. The little work that couldn’t wait was done from home. Today he had to make two video calls, so he had gone upstairs to change into something that seemed a little more appropriate for work than a shirt and short cargo pants.

Felicity was meanwhile resting on the couch. Wrapped in the warm blanket, she watched Emmy play with her new toddler’s laptop, an improved version of the laptop she had had before. She loved the thing and played with it whenever she could. It had probably been the best Christmas gift they could have given to her. When Emmy was playing with that laptop, she didn’t notice anything around her.

Although things had calmed down and were slowly going back to normal now, Felicity still felt terribly guilty. When she had seen the scratches on Oliver’s forearm the morning after her breakdown, she had started crying again and apologized at least half an hour. Of course Oliver had known the right words to say about that. “Felicity, you sometimes leave even worse scratches all over my back, and you have never apologized for those,” he had said with a smug smile and even if it hadn’t made her laugh, it had made her stop crying. When John had come over that day to pick up Emmeline for the time Felicity and Oliver were going to the doctor, he had asked about those scratches, and Oliver had answered immediately that they had had a wild sex orgy. Felicity had slapped him on the chest, but he had only chuckled amusedly. Shaking her head, Felicity sighed at the memory.

“So, let’s get over with this video calls, so I can change back into more comfortable clothes.”

When Felicity looked up to where Oliver entered the living room, she couldn’t suppress the giggle that came out of her mouth and that soon developed into a full laugh – a laugh that made Oliver smile happily because he hadn’t heard in a while. Even within the last week Felicity’s laughs had only been halfhearted. Not this time.

“Come on, it can’t be that bad,” Oliver pouted with a grin on his face and looked down at his body. He had indeed made himself look a little bit more appropriate for his video call. He wore a white dress shirt, a blue tie, a grey suit jacket – and still his short cargo pants. “Besides, the camera shows only my upper body anyway.”

Felicity was still laughing when Oliver stepped closer, leaned over her and pressed a long, gentle kiss to her lips. It made her sigh into his mouth.

“Sounds good to hear you laugh again,” he whispered against her lips before kissing her once more, more shortly this time.

“Feels good to laugh again,” Felicity replied with a low sigh and tugged at Oliver’s tie to make him lean down once more and kiss him one last time. “So do those video calls now.”

Grumbling, Oliver turned around and sat down on the dinner table where he had set up his small home office already. Felicity turned to her side and watched him making that first call. He looked serious while he discussed something with his business partner Felicity barely understood since she was too distracted by Oliver’s good look. There was that small frown between his eyebrows and his strong arms made the suit look almost a little too tight, but it looked sexy as hell.

“Is there a reason you are looking at me like that?” Oliver asked when he ended that first call and put some folders aside.

“Just the usual one,” Felicity said with a smirk before she mouthed, “You are sexy as hell.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Queen.”

“You’re welcome, Mr. Queen. And now get that second video call done, so you can come here and cuddle with me on the couch.”

“Cuddle!” Emmy exclaimed and immediately ran towards the couch with her arms wide open to climb right onto Felicity and lie down on her chest.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Felicity whispered, wrapping Emmy with her under the blanket.

Emmeline’s comforting weight on her body was almost enough to lull Felicity into sleep. It felt so great to have her little daughter that close. Not long and the baby bump was growing too big for Emmeline to lie on her mother like that. She was only in her 13th week, but Felicity would swear that she looked like she was at least in her 6th month already. Oliver’s wide hoodies barely hid the bump anymore, which was definitely something they needed to talk about urgently.

They still hadn’t told anyone about the pregnancy. Well, Lyla knew of course and Felicity knew that her mother and Quentin knew, but nobody else did. Emmy needed to know soon. She was already making strange faces whenever she saw the belly. Yesterday she had put an index finger on it and asked, “Balloon?” So Emmy really needed to take her nap, so Felicity could talk to Oliver about it.

Oliver was still in the middle of his video call when Emmeline slipped from the couch, walked over to where she had put her play phone and then walked over to Oliver. Felicity made wild gestures to keep her daughter from interrupting her father’s business talk, but Emmy was already holding out the phone to Oliver and made noises that sounded a lot like she was dying any second, but were actually supposed to mimic the ringing of a phone.

“Sorry,” Oliver said to his video partner, “I got an important call coming in.”

He turned sideways and took the phone from Emmy, saying, “Yeah?”

Emmy didn’t answer. She just stood there and smiled at her father happily.

“Hello?” Oliver asked.

“Hello!” Emmeline answered.

“Can I help you?”

“Yeah. Yup.”

“Here you go,” Oliver said, handing her back the phone and Emmeline pressed it to her ear to continue the imaginary phone call. Oliver looked after her a second longer before he looked back. “Sorry. My daughter.”

Felicity turned her face more into the pillow to silence her happy giggles. Oliver wasn’t only the world’s best husband, but also the world’s best father. She loved seeing him with Emmy and couldn’t wait for their little family to expand.

The memories of the time when Emmy had been very young were some of her favorites. She remembered how they had had to set an alarm to give Emmy to the other one every five minutes because they both had been so addicted to holding her that they had rarely ever agreed on when to give her to the other parent. She remembered how they had barely been able to leave her out of their sight because they had just loved watching her all the time. Now they were going to have all of that again. And Felicity could barely wait.

She didn’t notice that she had fallen asleep until she felt someone, she immediately knew were Oliver, adjust the blanket around her and press a gentle kiss to her hair. Sighing, she opened her eyes and looked right at him.

“Sorry,” he whispered, “I didn’t mean to wake you. I just didn’t want you to feel chilly.”

“Best way to prevent that is always to lie down right next to me and wrap your arms around me,” she said with a yawn.

Smiling, Oliver did as she had said. He had changed back into a shirt now, so his forearms grazed over the naked skin of the small of her back where his hoody had ridden up a little on her body. It sent goosebumps all over her skin. With another yawn, Felicity rested her head on the pillow right next to Oliver’s. Without saying a word, they just looked into each other’s eyes.

The comfortable silence was finally back. While they had been fighting, it had been awkward when nobody had said a thing because the tension had immediately increased due to the silence. Now it was like it had been before. They could star stare at each other with barely visible smiles on their lips and enjoy the quiet moment. Felicity leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to Oliver’s lips, feeling a warm shiver run down her spine.

“We need to talk,” she whispered then, not really wanting to destroy the moment, but knowing that they really had to talk.

“About what?” he asked, just as quietly.

“We need to tell people. We need to tell Emmy.”

“Is it wrong that I really want to keep this a secret a little while longer and enjoy the time were it is just us knowing?”

“I feel the same way.” Felicity sighed. “We would have had so much time if I hadn’t-“

Hastily Oliver leaned forward and captured her lips with his, effectively silencing another guilty apology. Oliver knew how much she suffered from thinking that everything that had happened was her fault. He knew that she thought that she had of course not destroyed, but at least severely damaged their marriage. And Oliver knew that what Felicity needed most right now was all the support and love he could give her.

“We need to tell Emmy,” Oliver repeated her prior statement with a nod. “Are you sure she understands the whole baby thing?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders and moved her face closer to Oliver’s making their noses bump against each other’s. She hadn’t known it most of the time, but she had missed the physical and emotional closeness to him, so she was trying to catching up on that right now. Even the smallest touches set her whole body on fire.

“I don’t know,” she finally replied, remembering that Oliver had asked her something, “but at least she has noticed the baby bump and know she is wondering if her mommy has eaten a balloon or whether she’s becoming one.”

Oliver chuckled quietly, capturing her lips in another kiss. He had always had a fascination with her lips. He loved them when she wore blazing red lipstick and he loved them when they were naturally naked. He loved them when they moved fiercely to keep up with Felicity’s babble and he loved them when the bottom lip was tugged between her front teeth. But most of all Oliver loved her lips when they were on his.

“So we will tell Emmy as soon as she has woken up,” Oliver suggested, kissing her once more. Lately he felt even more gravitated to her lips than usually.

“Actually,” Felicity whispered between two kisses, and Oliver pulled back to look into her face, “I think we should wait until next week.”

“Didn’t we tell everyone when you were in the 13th week last time you were pregnant?”

“We did,” Felicity said, busying her hands by playing with the neckline of his shirt. Unable to look him in the eyes, she lowered her gaze to her fingers. “But I thought we could-“

She stopped when Oliver’s fingers gently lifted her face until she looked him in the eyes again. Had his eyes always been so blue? It was like she was staring right into the ocean and she was sure that if she leaned forward she would be pulled under water.

“What did you think we could do?” Oliver asked gently.

“Go away for a weekend. Just the two of us,” she whispered so lowly, she wasn’t sure whether he had heard it. “We let Emmy stay with Thea and Roy, and go on a short trip. Somewhere where there is just us.”

“Are you sure you are ready for this?” he asked worriedly. “Don’t get me wrong, Felicity. I love the idea of spending time alone with you. I’m just scared that you might not have enough room if we go away where there is just the two of us. And Lyla wouldn’t be there.”

“But I am fine. Really,” she assured him.

Oliver eyed her up quietly, searching for the slightest uncertainty in her eyes. He wanted to go away with her, spend time just with her, but not if that meant that she was going to back away once more. But Felicity’s face showed nothing but the desire for him to say yes.

“Then that sounds like a good idea,” Oliver finally answered, leaning in and kissing her once more.

Felicity smiled, almost surprised. “Really?”

“Really,” Oliver said. “Let’s make it a long weekend and stay until Monday, maybe Tuesday. We just don’t drive too far away, so we can come back soon when we feel the need for it.”

“We can’t let Emmy alone that long, though,” Felicity replied with a low grumble, “especially not after everything that happened.”

“Let’s say we will go on a trip from Saturday morning to Monday evening. We have more time with each other and Emmy won’t stay away for too many nights. I’ll organize everything, so you don’t have to worry about anything, okay?”

“Okay,” Felicity whispered against his lips and kissed him gently.

Their lips stayed together much longer right now. Felicity moved even closer to Oliver and Oliver’s hands moved all over her back. When their kiss deepened, his hands moved from her back to her hips, but then stopped and Oliver pulled away, looking at her with wide eyes. His face showed a rarely seen uncertainty.

“Can I touch it?” he asked. Now it was his voice that was so quiet that one could barely hear it.

“Touch what?” Felicity asked.

“The belly,” Oliver answered. His right arm was still wrapped around Felicity tightly, but his left hand was now hovering over the belly that was hidden under the hoody.

Felicity’s heart sank. Oliver had never felt the need to ask her if he was allowed to touch her. He usually knew that he was and he also knew her well enough to read her moods and decide when the time to better not touch her was. A moment like this had always been an open invitation for him to touch her. She felt tears in her eyes at the thought that she had pushed him away so much that he was-

Before she could think that though to an end, Oliver’s lips were already moving over hers. When their lips parted, he whispered, “Don’t worry about it. I just wanted to make sure you’re comfortable. I will go down there and have a little conversation with our baby if you don’t mind.”

She made an accepting gesture, instead of telling him that it was too soon for the baby to hear him. It was taking a few more weeks before it could listen to anything outside of Felicity’s body. Ever so gently Oliver turned her onto her back and spread her legs a little so he could rest between them with his face at the height of her bump. He pushed the fabric of his hoody she was wearing up until her belly was naked in front of him. He took in the sight of the round curve. Until now he had only assumed that there was anything to see and during the tight hugs they had shared since her breakdown he had felt the belly press against his body, but he had never seen it and never touched it. So everything he had thought to know about the baby bump had been based on assumptions. To finally see where his baby was growing now, was as overwhelming as it had been during the first pregnancy.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered, his lips barely away from her naked skin.

He looked up to her face, once again making sure that Felicity was okay with being touched, and she gave him a short nod. So Oliver put his hand on the side of her belly, and smiled widely at the feeling of her soft skin under the palm of his hand.

“I am your daddy,” he whispered, his hand moving all over the bump. “I just wanted to let you know that we can’t wait to meet you. You will be so loved because you have the best mother you can wish for and a sister who is going to love you so much. Your daddy is a little bit messy, but he will always make sure that you are happy and safe.”

Without further thinking he closed the distance between the belly and his lips, kissing it softly. Her skin felt perfect underneath his lips, soft and warm. When Felicity squirmed slightly and whimpered lowly, he lifted his gaze to her face, and their eyes locked. Tension built between them, a different tension than there had been lately, a tension both of them remembered from before their fight. Slowly Oliver moved up her body, staying propped up onto his arms to not force all his body weight on her. They never took their eyes from each other as they let the tension increase and wash over them. None of them moved, making sure the other felt the exact same thing. They hesitated, their eyes still locked to each other’s. Felicity could hear her blood pounding in her ear. She could feel goosebumps spreading all over her body once again and skin prickled pleasantly. Oliver felt the same. He had stopped breathing. His whole body literally hurt with the need to touch her.

For three endlessly long heartbeats they stayed unmoving and then, suddenly, finally, they moved. Their lips met in a longing kiss. Their arms wrapped around each other’s body, closing any distance there was between them, physically and emotionally. Their lips never parted, so they breathed each other in. Their hands roamed each other’s body, rediscovering what they had memorized so long ago. It was as easy as breathing.

Their clothes came off, piece by piece, until it was just them. Oliver caressed Felicity’s naked body, kissed every curve, licked every inch of her skin. Felicity gently scratched Oliver’s back and bit down on his scars. They took their time to enjoy the comfortableness and to deepen their pleasure until it was almost unbearable not to join each other completely.

So Oliver lowered his body onto hers and entered her, slowly and gently. Immediately their lips met again. Their hearts beat in perfect unity while they stayed unmoving, getting used to the feeling they had felt so often, but that still was new every time. When they started moving, they moved in harmony, slowly and gently. Their hips never distanced too far. Low whimpers and moans filled the room.

When their breaths grew shorter and their movement more urgent, their fingers entwined. Their lips parted. Their foreheads rested against each other’s and they locked eyes. His name fell from her lips as a passionate whisper when she clamped around him, taking him with her with her name falling from his lips.

They stayed close to each other after. Felicity’s head rested on Oliver’s chest, her hand moved up and down his abs, tracing the up and down of the muscles. Nobody said a word. They stayed in comfortable silence.

Felicity closed her eyes. She could easily fall asleep, but she knew that it was only a matter of minutes before Emmeline would wake up from her nap and decide that she wanted her parents’ full attention. So Felicity stayed awake, and savored the feeling of Oliver’s fingertips moving up and down her spine. She smiled when a memory flashed through her mind.

“What is making you smile?” Oliver asked, feeling the uplift of her lips against his skin, and combed her hair with his fingers.

“Do you know what day this is?” she asked.

“It’s Wednesday,” Oliver answered, but Felicity could hear the grin in his voice even without looking. He knew just as well as she did which day this was.

“You know I don’t mean that.”

“Yes, I know,” Oliver chuckled, and kissed her forehead. “Today is the day that has been marked as the day to make a baby with me in your calendar.”

“You haven’t forgotten?” Felicity asked Oliver, turning her head to look at him.

Oliver smiled back at her. “No, I haven’t forgotten. I’ve been counting down to this day until we learned that you are pregnant already.”

“Me, too,” Felicity smiled and leaned over to kiss Oliver gently. “I love you.”

“I love you,” Oliver replied, their lips meeting once more.

Oliver was just about to pull Felicity closer, to embrace her in his arms and deepen the kiss once again when they heard tripping footsteps upstairs in the corridor. Hastily they moved apart and Oliver barely managed to dress into his boxers and shirts and cover Felicity with the blanket before Emmeline appeared on the part of the stairs from where she could see through the open door into the living room.

“Hey, sweetheart, you’re up?” Oliver said with a smile. Emmeline nodded and was already making attempts to come further downstairs when Oliver walked around the couch and towards the stairs. “Come on, let’s get you dressed, so mommy can rest a little more.”

Walking up the stairs, Oliver looked back at Felicity to wink at her smugly, and Felicity hid her face under the blanket to hide the red blush that spread all over her skin. She waited until she heard the door to Emmy’s room being opened before she dressed herself, cleaned up the mess they had made on the couch and grabbed the phone.

“Felicity, what’s wrong?” Lyla’s voice was heard immediately.

“Nothing,” Felicity answered breathily, unable to hide the smile on her face. “Actually I thought that after you have listened to all my problems and worries and everything that has been going on lately, you might like to hear something positive.”

“Well, if there is something positive, then tell me.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, smiling to her herself. Her body still prickled from everything that had happened within the last two hours.

“I think Oliver and I are fixed, and… I’m happy.”

 

* * *

**Time for a story Special - Extra scene - Felicity and Oliver go to the doctor  
**

Felicity’s body seemed tense. Her fingers were trembling heavily. Her eyes stared into the empty air. She chewed on her bottom lip.

“Hey, everything is alright,” Oliver whispered and took one of her hands, kissing the knuckles. He squeezed her hand in reassurance, smiling at her. “You don’t have to be scared. The doctor is going to find out what is going on with you, and I will stand by your side no matter what.”

When two tears ran down Felicity’s cheeks, he gently wiped them away without saying a word. He knew that Felicity was scared, terrified even, but he was sure that she also knew that she had to talk to the doctor about what was going on with her. She suffered and she shouldn’t suffer. So what she needed was the doctor. Calling him had been the first thing Oliver had done this morning. Before the shower. Before coffee.

“Mrs. Queen?”

Felicity flinched at the sound of her name, but got up from the chair and followed the doctor’s assistant to one of the treatment rooms. Oliver didn’t miss how the hold she had on his hand tightened the closer they came to the room.

“Please wait here. The doctor should be there any minute.”

As soon as the door was closed behind them and they were alone, Oliver turned Felicity around to face him and lifted her chin to make her look at him. Her eyes were swollen and red from all the crying and wet streams showed where the tears had ran down her cheeks. Some wet spots on the hoody she wore showed where the tears had dropped from her jaw and to the fabric of her clothes.

“Hey,” he said softly. “I love you. Whatever the doctor says, we will get through it. We have been through so much. Don’t worry about anything, okay? The only thing that’s important right now is that you feel better. Okay?”

Felicity looked into his eyes, not saying a word or reacting any other way, but eventually she nodded, wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him close. 

“Everything is okay,” Oliver whispered to her hair before he pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, rubbing her back comfortingly. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Queen,” Dr. Hampton said when he entered the room, “you called because of an emergency. Please sit down and tell me.”

Oliver looked at Felicity, waiting for her to say something, but she sat on her chair, kept his hand in both of hers and looked down to the floor. So Oliver turned back to the doctor and explained, “Felicity might suffer from a depression.”

The doctor eyes up Felicity with a frown before he turned his eyes back to Oliver. “Why do you think so?”

“She was… different lately. She was quiet, didn’t talk to anyone and was angry a lot. That made her feel guilty and now she can barely stop crying,” Oliver said and couldn’t help, but feel that he sounded like he was describing some stranger or whatever. It sounded analytic. “It has become better, but she had a nightmare last night and…”

Dr. Hampton nodded. “Okay, Felicity, I will ask you a few questions now, okay?”

Felicity didn’t answer. Oliver could see tears falling from her eyes, and it broke his heart once more. He knew that his was hard for her, but he also knew that it was going to help, so he gently squeezed her fingers, saying her name, “Felicity?”

Slowly Felicity lifted her gaze and nodded, showing that she was ready to answer the doctor’s questions. 

“Do you still laugh sometimes?”  
“Do you feel any happiness?”  
“Do you feel guilty for how you feel?”  
“Are you scared of things, even meaningless?”  
“Do you feel sad and miserable?”  
“Do you have trouble sleeping?”  
“Do you love your unborn child?”  
“Do you think about suicide?”

Oliver watched Felicity’s face closely while she answered each of the doctor’s questions. He had trouble to control his own emotions when he heard the last two questions. Oliver hadn’t thought about the fact that the pregnancy could cause her to resend her child or to kill herself. Luckily, the answer to both of those questions was a ‘no’, but it still made his heart hurt, and he squeezed her hand once more, reassuring himself this time.

The doctor asked some further questions about how Felicity felt and what she was thinking before he asked her to lie down and lift her pullover, so he could take a look at the baby. Oliver went with Felicity, never letting go of the hand she clung to now. Her nails were digging into his skin painfully, but he didn’t say a word about it. 

Dr. Hampton did an ultrasound. Oliver watched the smile on Felicity’s face when she heard the heartbeat of the baby, and he pressed a short kiss to her forehead. Her eyes were still filled with tears when she turned her head to look at him, but at least she smiled through the tears now. 

“Okay, your baby looks perfect,” Dr. Hampton said with a reassuring smile. “I will print you the picture. Mrs. Queen, you can get back up. The papers to clean your belly are right behind your husband.”

Oliver turned around and gave the small box with the paper towels to Felicity. She only used her left hand to clean the skin of her belly since her right hand still held his. Hand in hand they went back to their chairs in front of the doctor’s desk.

Dr. Hampton gave them the photo of their baby and then looked at them seriously. He folded his hands in front of him on the tabletop and said, “I fear that your suspicion is right and you, Mrs. Queen, probably suffer from a depression.”

“Probably?” Oliver asked.

“Well, there are no methods that can really tell whether someone suffers from a depression. There is still too much in the human psyche or brain that medicine doesn’t know about. All I can say is that Felicity shows some of the typical symptoms that come with a depression. So yes, she probably suffers from depression.”

Probably. Probably. Probably. Oliver repeated the word over and over again in his mind, but it didn’t satisfy him any more than before. He had known that Felicity probably suffered from a depression already. That was why they had come here to ask the doctor whether she indeed did. He wanted a clear answer. He wanted-

Felicity squeezed his hand gently, and when he turned his head to look at her, she smiled softly. Of course she knew that he wasn’t happy with the doctor’s answer.

Felicity sniffled, but nodded at the doctor. Oliver put his free hand to the one of hers he was holding already, keeping it between both of his now. Felicity looked up at him and he smiled in reassurance. The right corner of Felicity’s mouth lifted slightly, but the smile didn’t reach her eyes. 

“So what now?” Oliver asked Dr. Hampton.

“Well, first we should concentrate on the good things here,” Dr. Harrison answered with a mild smile. “Felicity doesn’t have any suicidal thoughts and she doesn’t resent her baby. Sometimes depression during pregnancy can lead to a retarded development of the baby, but that didn’t happen.”

Oliver felt his heart skip another beat before it started racing in his chest. This depression was causing damage to two of the most important people in his life. He had always done his best to protect Emmeline and had never thought that there was something he couldn’t save any of his children from. Prenatal depression seemed to be his new worst enemy from now.

“Depressions are still very serious,” Dr. Hampton continued. “That is why we should discuss a possible treatment.”

“And what will that be?” Felicity asked.

“Well, the first possibility is to treat the depression with medicine.”

“No.” The answer came so fast that Oliver turned his head to look at her. Her eyes were wide opened while she looked at the doctor.

“Fe-”

“No,” Felicity interrupted him immediately. “No medicine. I have read about the antidepressants. I know they’ve shown no negative influence on the unborn babies in the past, but I also know that there are no long-term studies, so-”

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted softly. He knew that she had done some research while he had made breakfast this morning. He just hadn’t known how much she knew already about prenatal depression, how to treat it and how to better not treat it.

“No, it’s okay,” Dr. Hampton said. “The antidepressants were only thought to be an addition to psychotherapy anyway.”

“No psychotherapy,” Felicity said immediately.

Oliver took in a deep breath, kissing Felicity knuckles once more to regain some patience. He knew that she didn’t want help because she felt guilty. She knew that she needed help, though. But if she rejected any treatment the doctor offered, she wouldn’t get better.

“What is the third option?” Oliver asked the doctor, doing his best to hide his frustration.

“Well, we could wait. You have come here to look for help. That is always a good sign. You’ve said Felicity is already getting better, so we could do nothing for now. In that case the two of you would have to keep a close look on how the depression develops. In case it gets worse, you should come back immediately and we can discuss how to go on and reconsider the other two options.”

“No,” Oliver said at the same time Felicity said, “Yes.”

Their eyes met and each looked determinedly. Oliver wasn’t going to sit at home and do nothing. He couldn’t do that. If Felicity fell back into depression, she might not accept any help, so they needed to protect her from falling back in the first place.

“How about you will go home, drink a tea and discuss your options?” Dr. Hampton suggested softly. “All of this had been a lot for you to take in today. You should take your time and think about what could help. I will give you a few flyers that can teach you some things about how to handle depression. Just keep in mind that therapy isn’t effective if the patient doesn’t trust it.

Half an hour later their front door closed behind him. Oliver leaned back against it and watched Felicity head right into the living room where she let herself fall onto the couch with am exhausted groan. She had barely said a word on their ride home, but Oliver knew that they needed to talk, so he slowly approached her and sat down on the couch table.

He didn’t want to push her, fearing that it could push her away from him, but he wanted to help her. He needed to help her even.

“Felicity-” he started, but hastily closed his mouth when Felicity got up into a sitting position, taking his hands.

“I am not going to take any of the medicine,” she said.

“Fine,” Oliver said with a nod of his head. “No medicine. So the psychotherapy.”

“No.”

“Felicity.” It had meant to be a soft whisper, but sounded more like a sigh. 

“Oliver, how am I supposed to feel comfortable, telling someone about our life, when I know that I have to keep the nightly half of it to myself? What if I babble about the fact that you are the Arrow?”

“I quit then. I hang up the hood and-”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous,” Felicity said, frowning and taking her hands back to herself to cross her arms in front of her chest. “You are not going to quit. This city needs you.”

“If that is what is keeping you from going to therapy, I quit. Besides, the doctor said you should avoid stress and being put through what we do at night is stress,” Oliver just replied. “I will quit. You can go to therapy. It’s a win-win-situation.”

“You are not giving up your work as the Arrow,”

“Felicity.”

“Oliver.”

For a long moment none of them said another word. Oliver was serious about it. He would give up the hood, but he could see in Felicity’s eyes that she wasn’t going to let him give up on what he had built with starting his crusade, so he tried his back-up plan. “You can go to the doctor who treated Cupid. She offered to help me. I am sure we are safe if you go there.”

“Really?” Felicity asked, perking her eyebrows. “You want me to go to the same doctor who treated a crazy lady that dropped dead bodies everywhere in the city as a gift to you?”

Oliver cracked a small smile. “It would be better than nothing.”

But Felicity shook her head.

Oliver sighed, remembering the doctor’s words. If Felicity didn’t want the therapy, it wouldn’t help her anyway. So he needed to find a different solution or as Felicity would say, he needed to find another way.

“How about a compromise?”

“Compromise?” she asked skeptically.

“Yes, a compromise,” he said with a nod. “You think you can’t go to therapy because there is no doctor you could talk to who you could completely open up to, right?”

Felicity nodded, her hands moved closer to his until her fingertips touched his skin. Oliver opened his hands and he put hers into them. 

“What if there was someone who isn’t a doctor, but who could help? Would you give it a try and talk to that person like she was your doctor? I don’t know… maybe one weekly session for the beginning and spontaneous meetings when you feel the need?”

Felicity frowned. “Who are you talking about?”

“Lyla,” Oliver answered. “You trusted her enough to open up to her about what was going on before. She is our friend. I think you should meet her at least once a week and ask her to be some kind of emergency contact.“

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied, biting down on her lip. “I don’t want to burden her with-”

“I am sure Lyla won’t see it that way,” Oliver interrupted her. “How about we will call her and ask her about it?”

Felicity still hesitated, but eventually she nodded. It eased at least some of the tension in Oliver’s body. He was sure that Lyla was going to help. And even if there were probably better, more professional ways to treat Felicity’s depression, he was happy that she agreed to at least any kind of help.

The phone call with Lyla was done quickly. Of course she would help. It shouldn’t even have been a question. Felicity should call her whenever she needed someone to talk to. She was always there for her. 

Finally something that worked, Oliver thought when he hung up. 

Felicity stood right in front of him, staring at him.

“What?” he asked gently.

“I love you, you know that?”

“I love you, you know that?” he asked back.

Smiling, they wrapped their arms around each other, and Oliver put his chin to the top of her head when she snuggled her face to his chest. 

God, he had missed holding her like that. He hadn’t slept the last night, too afraid he could wake up and not hold her anymore. How had he survived so long without holding her close? Without the feeling of her heart beating in sync with his? 

He was going to do whatever Felicity needed to protect both of them from a repetition of what had happened. He wasn’t going to let her lose herself ever again.


	59. Being a family

“Felicity?” she heard Oliver’s low whisper in her ear. His breath ghosted over the side of her face, tickling her and making a warm shiver run down her spine even if she wasn’t completely awake. His lips made gentle contact with the skin just below her ear before he whispered quietly, “Felicity, honey, we’re there. You’ve got to wake up.”

Even in her half dizzy state Felicity knew that Oliver was right. She had to wake up because they were at Thea’s and Roy’s penthouse and they needed to get Emmy back home. She knew that, but she felt so comfortably sleepy, so safe and warm that she really didn’t want to open her eyes. She wanted to stay like this, wrapped in the warmth of his grey hoody jacket, that still smelled like him, and sleep a little more. Just a little. After this weekend full of passionate sex, and heart-to-hearts and even short times they had spent crying in each others’ arms she really needed the energy.

But Oliver just refused to let her rest. He pressed his lips to her skin once more, whispering, “The sooner you wake up, the sooner we can get Emmy and go back home where you can sleep in our bed which is far more comfortable than the passenger seat of this small car. Come on, baby, open your eyes.”

Felicity grumbled grumpily, but she opened her eyes slowly. Her eyes immediately found Oliver’s. He was looking at her with a mixture of love, adoration and amusement in his blue eyes. A smile was playing on his lips. When Felicity grumbled again, stretching herself to get rid of the tiredness in her bones and muscles, the smile really showed and he pressed a kiss to her full lips right after her head came to lean at the head rest of the car seat. Still, Felicity grumbled against his lips, angry at him for waking her up.

“We will just go in there, get Emmy and get out. This will be a deal of five minutes.”

“Have you met your sister?” Felicity asked skeptically. “Once we set one foot into the penthouse, Thea won’t let us get away before we have told her exactly what we have done all weekend long.”

“Sex against the wall, sex in the bed, sex in the bed again, lunch, sex in the shower, sex back in the bed, dinner, se-“

Felicity stopped him by slapping her hand against his chest, but Oliver caught it easily and lifted her hand to his lips to press a kiss to her knuckles. He kept their fingers entwined tightly while he looked at her lovingly. It made butterflies flutter in the pit of her stomach. She just couldn’t be angry at him when he looked at her like that which was why she actually couldn’t be angry at him at all because he always looked at her like that. It would be annoying if it wasn’t so cute.

“Come on, let’s get Emmy,” she said.

Quietly they walked upstairs to the penthouse they had been living in once, too. They could hear Emmeline’s happy laugh even through the closed door.

“Doesn’t seem like she has missed us too much,” Oliver whispered with a wide grin on his face. “Maybe we should turn around and go back to the hotel for the rest of the week.”

“Oh please, you would never survive a full week without your baby girl,” Felicity said. She smiled tiredly and leaned against the wall. “Come on, the sooner we knock, the sooner we get her back and the sooner we can go home. And the sooner I can sleep.”

Chuckling at how tired she sounded, Oliver lifted his hand to the door and knocked. It only took seconds before Roy opened them.

“Hi, guys,” he said, shooting both of them a gaze neither Felicity nor Oliver understood. He then opened the door more for them to come in. “Emmy, mommy and daddy are here.”

Immediately Emmy let all the toys she had been playing with fall to the floor and ran to Oliver with her arms spread widely. When Oliver lifted her from the floor, she put her arms around his neck and pressed a thousand kisses to his face. She then reached out for Felicity to hold her, and Oliver gave their daughter to his wife that was welcomed just as lovingly by the little blond girl as he himself.

“So… how was your trip?” Thea asked with a tense smile on her lips.

“Great, but Felicity as really tired, so it’s probably better to talk about this later. We just wanted to get Emmy home.”

Oliver’s answer made the smile on Thea’s face disappear completely. She looked at Roy, who gave her a short nod before he took Emmeline from Felicity’s arms.

“We will go pack Emmy’s stuff while you can… talk,” he said seriously.

Felicity and Oliver exchanged questioning gazes. They had thought that Thea was going to ask them a thousand questions and then bargain for more time with Emmeline because that was what usually happened when Emmy had spent a night at Thea’s place. Sending her goddaughter to a different room with Roy to talk to her brother and sister-in-law was new. And neither Oliver nor Felicity had the feeling that it was a good kind of good.

“I know that you two want to get divorced,” she stated as soon as the door felt shut behind Emmeline and Roy.

Felicity opened her mouth to say something, but couldn’t find any words to say, so she closed it again and just stared at her sister-in-law. Oliver meanwhile frowned, crossed his arms in front of his chest and then asked, “Why would you think that?”

“It is so obvious. Okay, first Emmy literally sang the word ‘divorce’ a few weeks ago. Divorce, divorce, divorce, divorce,” she mimicked Emmeline’s singsong. “But I thought she just picked that up from TV or something. I mean you have always been like the power couple and the two of you getting divorced seemed kind of unrealistic to me. Besides, Emmy kind of repeats every word she hears. So I just dropped the thought. But then Felicity completely freaked out during the wrestling match and suddenly everything made sense. Felicity didn’t like the wrestling, she snapped at her mother because of it at Christmas and she is gaining a lot of weight, probably because of all the stress the two of you had when you discussed your decision. Well, and then suddenly the two of you totally backed off from the world around you. The whole last week almost nobody saw you and when they saw you it was only for few minutes. And now you have taken a weekend off to talk about who gets the house and how you will handle raising Emmeline and-“

Thea made a pause to take in a deep breath. Tears were forming in her eyes, and her voice was shaking when she continued, “I don’t know what has caused you to think that divorce is the only option. I really don’t know, and you don’t have to tell me, but what I do know is that the two of you can’t get divorced. You just can’t. You have a responsibility towards Emmeline and- We are a family. For the first time since you and dad have died, Ollie, we are a real family. We have an at least partly normal life. We are a family. All of us. And how is that going to work if the two of you get divorced? Ollie, Roy and I will spend Christmas here, the Diggles and Laurel will go celebrate with Felicity? And Emmeline will spend half of the holidays here, the other half at Felicity’s? And what about our nighttime job? How is that going to work if you-? You cannot get divorced.”

For a long time nobody said a word. Thea stared at her brother and her sister-in-law with a mixture of pain and anger in her tear-filled eyes. Oliver and Felicity stared back, not knowing what to say or do.

Yes, the word divorce had fallen, but it had never been a real option. They had never seriously considered getting divorced. Never. They hadn’t even known that Emmy had snapped up that word. Thea’s outburst hadn’t been anything they could have known would happen. Well, maybe they could have assumed it because just as Lyla other people close to them had probably noticed the tension between the two of them. They just… hadn’t spent too much time thinking about who could have noticed since they had moved forward.

The silence was broken when Felicity asked, “Are you saying I am getting fat?”

“Oh no, I am sure she didn’t mean it like that,” Oliver said hastily, framing Felicity’s face with his gentle hands. He pressed a short kiss to her lips. “You are beautiful.”

“You are my husband which means that you are legally obligated to say that,” she said before loosening his hands from her face and turning back around to Thea. “Are you saying I am getting fat?”

Thea looked from Felicity to Oliver and back again, frowning. “Okay, I have no idea what is going on here, but – really? That is what you focus on?”

“Yes,” Felicity said at the same time Oliver said, “No.”

He put both his arms around Felicity and pulled her right in front of him, his muscular chest warming her back. He snuggled the side of his face to the top of her head and enjoyed the way she leaned back into his touch, closing her eyes and sighing.

“Okay, someone needs to tell me what the hell is going on here,” Thea demanded.

“Felicity is pregnant.”

Both of them, Oliver and Felicity, were ready for a happy screech, but instead Thea just frowned even more. “That doesn’t explain your strange behavior.”

“Hormones,” Felicity and Oliver said in chorus.

They knew that it was actually better to talk to friends and family about issues like depression, but with their dangerous night jobs, every distraction could get you killed. So they had decided to not tell more people about it than knew already. Lyla knew, Quentin knew, Donna knew. That had to be enough. As long as there wasn’t any new acute phase of the depression, they would keep it between them.

“Pregnant?” Thea asked again.

Oliver nodded, and Felicity lifted his hoody over the swell of her stomach to show Thea the baby bump she had hidden under the thick fabric. Thea just stared at it two heartbeats long before she screeched happily and wrapped her arms around Felicity and Oliver tightly, holding them close. Felicity could feel her sister-in-law’s tears on the side of her neck and stroked over Thea’s hair, comforting her.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Thea asked.

“We wanted to wait until the critical time is over,” Oliver explained, wiping away the tears on his sister’s cheeks. “We didn’t want to worry you. Sorry.”

“Oh, it’s not that bad. I’ll just,” she said, gesturing towards the bathroom, “go and-“

Without ending her sentence she disappeared into the bathroom and Felicity sighed, leaning back against Oliver once more.

“We need to tell Emmy about the baby tonight or she will overhear someone talking about it. I’m not sure whether she will understand it if we don’t tell her directly, I am not even sure she will understand it then, but-“

“Better being too careful than risking anything. We need to tell her tonight.”

Felicity nodded, bit her tongue and looked to the floor. It was her fault Thea had assumed they were getting divorced and it was her fault they had feared she was losing her family. Everything that she had done had caused people to-

“Stop thinking about it,” Oliver whispered into her ear, tightening his grip around her before he pressed kissed to the side of her neck. “Thea is fine now. We are fine now. Everything is okay. There is nothing for you to worry about anymore.”

“But-“

Oliver stopped her objection before Felicity could even speak it out loud. He just pressed a firm kiss to her lips and stated, “We are fine and that is everything that matters.”

Felicity looked him in the eyes a little longer, but eventually she nodded and rested her head against his shoulders. Oliver was right. They were okay and that was all that mattered. That and the fact that they still were a family and always would be.

 

As soon as they returned home, they cuddled up on the couch. Emmy sat on her father’s lap and Felicity was pressed to Oliver’s side with her belly resting on his body, so it was well visible for Emmeline. Felicity had read that it was important to create the right atmosphere to tell your firstborn that it wouldn’t stay an only-child.

“Emmy, do you see mommy’s belly?” Oliver started carefully, tightening the arm around Emmeline while simultaneously moving his other hand up and down the swell of Felicity’s stomach.

Emmeline nodded and leaned forward to rest her hand next to Oliver’s on her mother’s clothes-covered belly. She mimicked his stroking movements, making Oliver and Felicity smile.

“Balloon?” she asked, cocking her head.

“No, there is no balloon in there,” Felicity answered. She put a hand on her daughter’s fingers that still rested on her stomach. “There is a baby.”

Oliver and Felicity watched their daughter’s reaction with held breath. The little girl stared at the belly for some time longer before she lifted her gaze, asking, “Baby?”

“Yes, a baby,” Felicity repeated and nodded.

Emmeline lifted the hoody eagerly, putting her hands on the naked belly and lowered her face closer to the swell of her mother’s stomach, eying it up.

“Where is baby?” she then asked.

“It’s inside,” Oliver answered. “It needs to grow.”

Emmeline moved her hands over the belly, patting it gently, before she repeated, “Baby?”

“Yes, a baby,” Oliver replied just as Felicity had.

“Eat it?” Emmy asked, and Felicity and Oliver both needed to bite their tongues to keep themselves from laughing. Laughing at your very clever, very nosy and actually very interested child was no good behavior for parents.

“No, I didn’t eat it.”

She stayed like that, eying up the belly and moving her hands all over it, for a little more time before she slid from her father’s lap and ran out of the living room. Oliver and Felicity looked after her.

“Do you think she got it?” Oliver asked.

“Not sure,” Felicity answered honestly. “And I had expected a little more excitement. On the other hand there is still so much time till the birth that she has enough time to… you know, really get it and hopefully get excited.”

Oliver nodded, still watching at where Emmeline had left the room. Smiling, Felicity put her hand to Oliver’s cheek and bent his head down until she could kiss his other cheek. He leaned into the touch immediately.

“Don’t worry, daddy, your baby girl will like the idea of being a big sister once she really understands it.”

Sighing Oliver rested his head back and nodded once more. “Yes, you are probably right.”

“Probably?” she asked teasingly.

“Of course you are right. You always are because you are very, very smart and I know that I should always listen to you and never disagree with you because you are so much smarter than me,” Oliver responded with a grin and kissed Felicity’s forehead. “Right answer?”

“Very right answer. That’s what I wanted to hear.”

Oliver leaned down and kissed her gently. Felicity sighed and wanted to deepen the kiss, but they were interrupted by the tripping footsteps that neared them. Just a moment later Emmeline climbed back on the couch and onto her father’s lap.

“Hey, you brought your pink giraffe to cuddle with mommy and daddy?” Oliver asked, putting his arm back around his daughter.

Emmy shook her head and lifted Felicity’s hoody once more, so the belly was naked again. She then put her arms around her mother’s stomach, caressing the skin with the stuffed giraffe in her hand. Her face rested right next to Felicity’s bellybutton.

“Emmy, do you want to say hi to the baby?” Felicity asked with tears in her eyes as Oliver rubbed their daughter’s back, a proud smile on his lips. Of course, the baby wouldn’t hear it, but it was more for Emmy anyway. Just like Oliver talking to the belly was more for him than for the baby.

“Hi, baby,” Emmy said, resting her cheek back on Felicity’s belly.

Oliver and Felicity watched their daughter a little longer before their eyes met over their daughter’s head. Smiling, Oliver leaned forward and captured her lips in a long, gentle kiss.

“I love you,” he mumbled against her lips before he kissed her once more.

“I love you, too.”

They stayed like this for a whole hour, watching their daughter cuddling with the baby belly. If they had managed to raise a child like this, getting a second one couldn’t be too hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... next chapter will be a mixture of fluff, fun and smut. Be prepared! :)


	60. Happy wife, happy life

Oliver kept throwing nervous glances in Felicity’s direction, trying to figure out if she was okay or if any of what happened around her was too much for her to take. In that case he would immediately get her out of here. He knew in the back of his mind that he was overreacting and overprotective, but he couldn’t help it. He was worried.

Felicity seemed fine, though. She stood next to Iris and Caitlin, talking about the pregnancy and smiling happily while her hand moved up and down the bump. They had finally told everyone about that they were expecting their second child, so she had decided to wear a tight dress that drew attention to her baby belly in the most perfect way.

It was the first time since Christmas that they had invited all their loved ones back to their house. Oliver had been against it because he had thought that maybe a party like this was too much trouble for Felicity and the stress could damage the progress she had made since everything with the depression had happened. He had argued that they could just tell everyone that they wanted to spend Valentine’s Day as a family, just the two of them with Emmeline and their unborn child, but shutting everyone out from Emmy’s birthday hadn’t seemed right. Besides, Felicity wanted their daughter to have a birthday party, so they had invited everyone despite his doubts.

He was happy that Felicity hadn’t let him talk her out of that now. She seemed fine and the smile on her face was proof enough that she didn’t feel overexerted or anything. Oliver just needed to come down now and switch off all the worries he had talked himself into those last couple of days.

“I know it is really personal, but can I touch it?” Iris asked, shyly pointing on the baby bump with her index finger.

“Sure,” Felicity answered immediately and took her friend’s hand to put it on the baby belly. “You won’t feel anything. The baby’s movements are not strong enough to be felt yet. That will take a few more weeks. I can sometimes feel it although I am not sure whether it’s the baby or one of my organs which is probably an inappropriate thing to say to anyone so I will better stop talking.”

“Can I touch it, too?” Caitlin asked. Even before she had formed the last syllable, Felicity had taken her hand and put it to the other side of her belly.

“Like I said, it’s kind of boring to touch it now. It will be more interesting when you guys can feel the baby kick, but that will have to wait for like… five weeks I think, maybe a little bit longer,” Felicity explained. “Poor Oliver – he tries to encourage the baby to kick harder. I tried to tell him that the baby can’t even hear him yet, but, well, you know Oliver.”

When Iris and Caitlin laughed amusedly about his behavior, Oliver rolled his eyes. Smiling, he approached the group and came to stand right behind Felicity, his chest pressed to her back. As soon as his hands moved to the belly, Iris and Caitlin moved their littler hands away, giving his strong pranks room.

“We should take money from everyone who wants to touch it,” Oliver joked, leaning his face to hers and pressing a short kiss to the juncture of her neck and shoulder. “We would earn another billion every day.”

“I would earn another billion every day that you would give to me. You are the eagerest in touching the belly after all. He is actually quite possessive about it,” Felicity added towards Iris and Caitlin.

Oliver tickled her lightly, causing Felicity to move her hands over his to stop them. When their fingers entwined, she turned her face back to look at him and smiled happily. Oliver bent his head a bit and their lips met in a loving kiss. She sighed into his mouth when his grip on her body tightened, and he deepened the kiss. Felicity barely heard Iris and Caitlin clear their throats, but it was enough to make her break the kiss and turn back around to her friends.

“Sorry. Pregnancy makes my brain go all…“ she said, gesturing with her hands around her head to show them what a mess was going on in there, especially when Oliver’s lips were on hers. Pregnancy was working its more welcomed impacts on Felicity lately.

“You two seem pretty happy when I am allowed to say that,” Caitlin said after a while, looking from Felicity to Oliver and back.

“We always like to hear that,” Oliver explained, kissing the top of Felicity’s head, “especially when we are this happy.”

Felicity was just about to add something, when Thea announced, “Okay, now is the time for presents. Emmy, sweetie, come here, you can unpack all the presents we have brought you now.”

Immediately Emmy came running from where she had played with the play kitchen Oliver and Felicity had given to her this morning and climbed on the couch next to Thea. Thea had planned the whole party and she had decided that the presents would only be unpacked after the cake. Felicity had no idea how she had managed to make Emmeline wait on the presents since the girl was usually as impatient as her father, but it had worked. Obviously. Next to the couch table was a pile of presents.

When Thea gave Emmeline the first present, the one from Oncle John, Aunt Lyla and Sara, the birthday child looked around until she found Felicity and reached out her hand, calling, “Mommy!”

Barry, who had sat down on Emmeline’s other side, moved a bit away to make room for Felicity to sit down between him and her daughter. She put an arm around the now two year old girl and smiled encouragingly for her to open the present. Emmeline took another look around like she was trying to make sure that she had everyone’s full attention before she started to unwrap the present.

“Emmy, what’s that?” Thea asked when Emmeline looked at the shopping basket full of accessories for her play kitchen.

Emmeline didn’t answer. Instead she leaned over to Felicity bump and showed the basket to it, saying, “For kitchen. I cook for you.” She pressed a short kiss to the baby belly and touched it gently.

While Felicity just kissed the crown of Emmeline’s head, all the others who stood or sat around them to watch the little girl unwrap her presents made, “Awww!” Emmy was really happy about the baby. She always hugged the belly and said “Hi, baby” and “Goodnight, baby”. It was the cutest thing in the world. So Emmy telling the baby about every gift she unpacked wasn’t exactly a huge surprise to Felicity or Oliver, but it still warmed their hearts to know that Emmeline was going to be a happy big sister.

“So what present to you like better, Emmy?” Barry asked when all the presents were unwrapped. “Do you like the finger paint from Aunt Caitlin and Uncle Ronnie or do you like the animal puzzle Aunt Iris and I gave you better?”

Felicity made a sound that could be described as a mixture of a sigh and a laugh. The four of them – Caitlin and Ronnie, Iris and Barry – had a silent war going on about had bought Emmeline the better gift. Felicity couldn’t even say how many phone calls and e-mails they she had gotten with questions about what Emmeline liked to do, what present she could like and so on. Cisco had to lay down some rules like the how much the present was supposed to cost maximum or otherwise Emmeline had probably been given two ponies and God knew what else.

“I like bos,” Emmy replied.

“You like both?” Felicity asked and Emmeline nodded.

“That’s my girl, very diplomatic,” Oliver smiled and winked at Felicity when she threw him a played annoyed look.

They continued to sit there for a while, watching Emmy and asking her questions before little groups started to form that were talking about different stuff. Felicity only heard Oliver say, “Hey, no experiments with my daughter, guys!”, but when she turned around to look at what Ray and Cisco were doing with or to the little birthday girl, they only looked at her innocently, a little too innocently maybe. Shaking her head, Felicity lifted the pile of ripped wrapping paper from the floor and went to the kitchen to trash it.

It was a really great day, she thought. After she had totally made up with Oliver and they had taken their time to start catching up on all the sex they had been missing, it was nice to have the rest of them around, too. She hadn’t been able to enjoy the time when they had all been here on Christmas. Today she could, though. And it was great.

“What are you smiling about?” Oliver’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts and made her flinch since she hadn’t hear him coming in, but his arms already wrapped around her from behind and his chest made contact with her back. She leaned back against him immediately.

“About how great it is that everyone is here,” Felicity explained, putting her hands on his on her belly and snuggling her face to the side of his neck.

“Hm…” Oliver made, ducking his head to press kisses to her cheek, her jaw and finally her pulse point. “I had hoped that it was something more like this that was making you smile.

Felicity rested her head back against his shoulder with a sigh and closed her eyes. His soft lips on her neck opened slightly to let the tip of his tongue caress her skin. He sucked gently. It made goosebumps spread all over Felicity’s skin and made her toes curl. Humming, she bent her head to the side, giving him better access to her neck, and put a hand to the back of his head to keep him where he was although she whispered, “We can’t do that.”

“Why?” he asked. The movement of his lips on her skin made her moan lowly.

“Because I am horny and we can’t have sex because we have guests, but if you keep doing that then I really, really, really want to have sex and we can’t do that, so-“

“It’s Valentine’s Day. Of course we can have sex,” Oliver interrupted her, pressing one last kiss to the side of her neck before he entwined their fingers and tugged at her hand to make her follow him.

He glanced towards the living room where their friends and family were still celebrating.

“Oliver, we can’t do this,” Felicity whispered, but couldn’t help herself. She already felt excited about the idea of having sex when Oliver pulled her with him upstairs. The kissing and sucking on her neck had already been enough to make her really want it right now. There were so many things that set Felicity’s libido on fire lately. Like Oliver rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt after work or Oliver knotting his tie or everything else that included Oliver in a suit. Actually that had always been a turn on, but ever since she was pregnant and had left her depression behind her mostly, it had only increased.

Without any further word Oliver opened the door to the bathroom and pushed her in.

“Did we ever have sex in this bathroom?” Felicity asked. Usually the bathroom next to their bedroom was their sex-bathroom. It had developed to one very early when they had moved into the new house. When Oliver got up in the morning, the first thing he usually did was kissing Felicity’s shoulder. Right after that he headed to the bathroom to take shower. When the kiss had woken Felicity she often got up and joined him in the shower. So that was their sex-bathroom. Since Felicity had always complained about the fact that there had been only one bathroom in their old home and she just couldn’t do her hair when the air was that humid, they had a second bathroom upstairs.

“I can’t remember,” Oliver answered, locking the door behind him. “In that case we will christen it now.”

He grabbed her hips and lifted her to the edge of the counter, slowly moving his hands from her knees up her thighs, taking the hem of her dress with them.

“Oliver, I don’t think we have that much time,” Felicity whispered. “They will notice that we are missing and start to search for us. We should better… You know, hurry up.”

Before she could say anymore, Oliver took a step forward, coming to stand between her opened thighs, his lips barely away from hers. Felicity’s heart stopped racing. God, why did he have to be so terribly hot? He smirked at her, moving his lips a little closer without touching hers. The moment the tip of his tongue came out to wet his lips, Felicity was gone. She grabbed the collar of his shirt to pull him closer and kissed him fiercely.

While she pulled his dress shirt out of his jeans, Oliver worked on taking off her panties and put them behind her on the countertop. Never breaking the kiss, he helped her to open the belt and the button of his jeans. While she framed his face and deepened the kiss even more, Oliver pushed his jeans and boxers down. His length was already hard.

When Oliver took a step closer and started rubbing his hard length between Felicity’s already wet fold without entering, she let her head fall back with a pant. That gave Oliver the perfect opportunity to cup her butt with his hands, pull her closer to the edge of the countertop and caress the side of her neck with his lips, his tongues and his teeth. He growled when Felicity moved against him, increasing the pace and force with which their hips met.

Felicity held onto Oliver’s shoulders. She wanted to wrap her legs around his hips, but the belly was in the way. It was already difficult to move in this position. Soon they would be kind of limited in their sex life. Thank God, they had always been creative when it came to that.

When the tip of Oliver’s length bumped against her clit, Felicity gasps for breath. She hastily moved one hand down his chest, gripped him and lined him up with her entrance. Their eyes locked when Oliver thrust forward slowly until he was buried to the hilt. Their foreheads fell against each other’s resting there. They breathed the same air as they panted, getting used to the feeling of being joined without moving.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered barely audible. “We have to hurry. They are waiting for us downstairs.”

“I know,” Oliver panted before he pulled Felicity even closer and then started moving.

Felicity put her arms back around Oliver’s neck and kissed him. She could get quite loud, especially during quickies, and since they didn’t want everyone downstairs to get alarmed by her screams, silencing herself with Oliver’s lips on hers seemed like the best decision and only decision to make.

Oliver moved quickly. He never pulled out to far, but his hard, short thrusts were exactly what Felicity needed right now. She felt her orgasm building in like no time. Since she knew, though, that Oliver needed a little more sensation, she snuck her hand under his dress shirt and gently scratched the burn scar on his back. He growled into her mouth and his thrusts became harder and faster once more.

“I’m close,” she whispered between two kisses, knowing that he could feel her muscles clenching around him already, but feeling the need to tell him nonetheless.

Just when Felicity was about to moan due to a particularly sharp thrust, Oliver put his hand on her lips and stilled his movements. She looked at him in question, but he only put a finger to his lips, making her keep quiet.

It wasn’t until Felicity heard a noise against the door that she understood. She moved slightly to look at the locked door and had to bite her tongue to keep from moaning since the movement caused Oliver’s erection to press more strongly against the side of her vagina. She turned her head to see that Oliver had the same trouble to keep quiet. They were both so close, but they couldn’t move to fall over the edge. Who knew who was outside? What if it was Emmeline and Sara? The girls would be traumatized after.

“Thea, we can’t do it.”

“It’s Valentine’s Day and nobody noticed we’ve gone upstairs.”

“Your brother is going to kill me.”

“No, he is not even going to know any about this. We are just having a quickie and are back downstairs before anyone notices.”

Felicity couldn’t help the grin that formed on her lips. Oliver must have felt it against the palm of his hand that was still on her mouth because he threw her an annoyed glare. Of course big brother Oliver couldn’t grin about the fact that his sister and her boyfriend sounded a lot like they had a few minutes ago. Instead he scrunched his nose and stared at the door as if the two of them could feel his anger through the closed door and would go away.

“Come on, Roy,” Thea whispered. “Hard and fast. It will only take minutes. Come on, Roy.”

Felicity could literally see the moment Oliver couldn’t take it anymore. His voice was almost a growl when he said, “Don’t you dare, Roy!”

“Oh man!” Roy was heard.

“Ollie?” Thea asked. “What are you doing upstairs?”

“I am trying to make my pregnant wife happy which means that the two of you will go back downstairs and leave us the hell alone.”

“Gross!” Roy groaned.

They heard some rustling of clothes and steps, telling them that Thea and Roy were leaving. So Oliver turned back to Felicity. Rolling his eyes he muttered, “Unbelievable!”

Oliver put his hands to her hips, massaging them gently. He was just about to start thrusting again when he heard his sister’s voice not far down the hallway, saying, “I told you they went upstairs to have sex.”

Felicity burst out laughing and it only got worse when she saw Oliver’s pouting face.

“Oh, come on, Oliver, that was funny!” she laughed, wrapping her arms back around his neck and pulling him in for a kiss. It took a while, but eventually Oliver started laughing, too. Shaking his head, he framed Felicity’s face with his hands and asked, “Are you done laughing, so we can continue this or what?”

“Uh, now you are becoming all growly,” she said, but it ended in a long moan when Oliver moved his hips against hers. “Okay, done laughing.”

They quickly worked each other back to the point where they had been interrupted, both close to fall over the edge and at the end the quiet whisper of each other’s name was what made them tumble over the edge together with great exposures of sensations ripping through their bodies. Felicity’s walls clenched around Oliver’s jerking erection, milking it until every drop of his hot seed was filling her. Her skin was prickling where Oliver touched it and Oliver felt his fingertips burn from touching her alone. Their lips met in one more kiss while they tried to catch their breaths.

“We should do this more often,” Felicity panted a little later, watching Oliver get dressed again.

“Have sex while there is a party for our child downstairs?”

“Oh God, we are the worst parents ever,” Felicity whined. “We just had sex on our baby girl’s birthday party.”

Laughing, Oliver helped her to put her panties back on, pressed a kiss to her swollen, red lips and pulled her off the countertop. He held her close since her legs were shaking slightly. Smiling, he said, “We are not the worst parents ever. We could have decided to not have a birthday party to have sex instead. That would have made us bad parents.”

Felicity groaned and let her head fall against his shoulder, closing her eyes for a brief second. She mumbled against the fabric of his shirt, “And now we have to go back downstairs and everyone will see that we had sex here.”

Chuckling, Oliver pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Come on, let’s better get this over with. The longer we wait, the worse it will get, I guess.”

So they entwined their fingers and hand in hand they strolled downstairs. They tried to sneak into the living room, but were stopped by John halfway. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest and shook his head. Felicity felt herself blushing, but she hastily stepped forward and pressed a kiss to John’s cheek before she fled further into the living room and sat down next to Laurel and Cisco. Oliver put his hands into the pockets of his jeans, looking down to the floor guiltily to avoid John’s eyes.

“Really, Oliver?”

Oliver couldn’t help himself. He had to grin. So he looked up and into his friend’s eyes, shrugging his shoulders. “Didn’t you once tell me that the motto of my life should be “Happy wife, happy life’?”

“Well if I said so…” John said, shaking his head once more before he went over to the play kitchen where Sara just taught Emmeline how to cook.

Smiling, Oliver looked once more at Felicity who was now in full tech-talk-mode while talking to Cisco. Laurel, who sat between those two looked kind of lost and hastily excused herself to not get into whatever kind of fight the both tech-geniuses seemed to have going on there. When Oliver heard noises from the kitchen, he headed that way.

“Hey, you don’t have to do that. I’ll take care of all of this later,” Oliver said hastily when he saw Lyla putting the used plates and forks to the dishwasher. “You better enjoy the party. Felicity will kill me if she notices that you have spent your time working here instead of enjoying some quality family time. You’re helping us enough as it is.”

“That’s what friends are for,” Lyla said with a smile. “And this little work is done quickly.”

Oliver stepped closer and started helping her. For some time they just worked in silence, nobody saying a word.

“It seems like Felicity feels much better,” Lyla stated then. “And the two of you are okay?”

“We are fine, perfect even,” Oliver answered with a wide grin, thinking about their short encounter upstairs a few minutes ago.

“But?” Lyla asked.

Oliver looked up in surprise, but Lyla only smiled knowingly. Of course she would hear the slightest objection in his voice.

“But,” Oliver said with a sigh, “Felicity is still blaming herself for what has happened. I can see it in her eyes. The guilt is eating her alive, even if she tries to push it down. I don’t blame her, Lyla. Felicity is sick or was sick, I’m not sure. Anyway, her actions have been caused by the depression, but she blames herself.”

When the last plate was put in, they closed the dishwasher and Oliver leaned back against the counter, turning his head to look towards the living room and watch Felicity, who was still talking to Cisco. Now they didn’t seem to discuss so much as they seemed to telling each other jokes because both of them were laughing till they cried and even with the tears streaming down their faces, they couldn’t stop.

This picture would probably be burnt into his memory forever.

“I am scared that the guilt will pull her back into another acute phase of depression,” he admitted with quiet voice, not taking his eyes off Felicity.

As if sensing his gaze on her skin, Felicity suddenly looked up and right at him. She cocked her head, seeming unsure about what the expression on his face meant. But she smiled reassuringly, so he winked at her, making her smile. After a while she turned her head back towards Cisco and Oliver looked at Lyla.

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Felicity needs a lot of love and support and understanding right now, Oliver,” Lyla replied softly. “You have managed the depression really well till now. I am sure you can help her getting through the guilt, too.”

Oliver nodded, looking back at Felicity once more.

“I actually have something in mind that could help,” Oliver explained with a slight smile. “Can you take Emmy one evening next week?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter... well, it's going to be epic!


	61. Still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> I received asks to write the missing scenes of Felicity telling Oliver about the depression and the visit at the doctor's. So I added those as "Time for a story Special - Extra scene"s the chapters 57 and 58 since I had already told so many people about further chapters and didn't want to mess with the numbers. Just so you know...
> 
> Anyway, have fun with this. I hope the "epic" tease didn't promise too much...

Felicity knew that there had been a good reason for why she had never wanted to go shopping with Thea again. Every time she had gone shopping with her sister-in-law Felicity had ended up with twice as much clothes as she had intended to buy. A few years ago it had been lingerie, this time it was maternity clothes. Thea just made her buy so much more than Felicity wanted or needed. Of course the clothes were nice since Thea was an excellent shopping counselor, but just like other shopping counselors Thea made her buy things Felicity wasn’t even sure she needed.

Like why had she made Felicity buy two extra hoodies solely for the pregnancy? Even when Felicity wasn’t pregnant she wore Oliver’s hoddies! And his fitted even now with the growing belly that made it impossible to wear any of her normal clothes.

“What are you going to do with the rest of your evening now?” Thea asked when she stopped the car in front of Felicity’s house. “A little fashion show for Ollie? No, wait! Don’t answer that. Otherwise I will probably get nightmares about my brother’s reaction to that black lace dress. Gross!”

“Thea,” Felicity sighed, taking her bags from the legroom, “all I am going to do for the rest of the day is putting my feet up, watching TV and cuddle with that sweet cupcake that happens to be my daughter. I think I am even too exhausted to watch an action movie, never mind do anything that includes me in action.”

“We should go shopping more often,” Thea suggested when Felicity got out of the car.

“Thea, I love you,” Felicity said with another sigh, turning around to her sister-in-law, “but shopping with you is more exhausting than the two hour training lesson Oliver planned out for me a while ago. Goodnight.”

“Night,” Thea replied with a wide grin before Felicity closed the door of the car and strolled towards the front door.

She only turned around to wave when she heard Thea drive away. After the car turned right at the end of the street, Felicity took in a deep breath and sighed, feeling all the exhaustion even more than she had felt it a second before. Maybe she would just head to bed immediately. Or she could fall asleep on the couch and let Oliver carry her upstairs. Neither would she have to walk upstairs, nor be forced to admit that not only her feet but her whole body was hurting like crazy and to ask him to carry her upstairs.

When she neared the house, she cocked her head and stared at the envelope that was taped to her white front door. Her name was on it, and Felicity recognized the handwriting immediately. Besides, who else would write her a message and tape it to their door? Smiling, she reached out her hand for the envelope and took out the letter that was in it.

_My dearest Felicity,_

Someone had a guilty conscience, Felicity thought immediately. Oliver only addressed her like that when he had done something bad. The last time he had let Emmeline play with Felicity’s tablet instead of her own toddler’s laptop. If her husband had managed to let their daughter mess her precious babies up again, his ‘dearest Felicity’ was going to become his very, very furious Felicity. She shook her head, turning her attention back on the letter in her hands.

_My dearest Felicity,_

_I know that you are probably exhausted after the shopping marathon with my sister, but I have evening plans for us. I promise you that you will like them even in your exhausted state, so please do me the favor and join in the fun. The first you should do is going upstairs and changing into something comfortable. After that please come back downstairs to the bottom of the stairs and wait for further instructions._

_I love you  
Oliver_

Felicity smiled at the letter. This was so typical for Oliver, planning something sweet for their evening. He had probably asked Thea to keep her busy during the day, so he had time to prepare whatever they were going to do tonight. And when Oliver said she was going to like it then she was going to like it. He knew her well enough to know what she liked to do after an exhausting day.

So Felicity opened the door and stepped into their house. She fumbled for the light switch, but the light didn’t switch on. Frowning, Felicity pulled her phone out of the depth of her purse and switched on the flashlight to lighten the way upstairs. If Oliver had indeed switched off the electricity, she would have to have a serious talk with him. He couldn’t let a clumsy, pregnant woman climb the stairs in the dark.

But Felicity was too excited about what Oliver had planned out for the two of them to waste too much thought on it. So she just changed into yoga pants and one of Oliver’s hoodies, put on an extra pair of socks and tied up her hair in her usual ponytail. She took off her contact lenses to put on her glasses instead. She had started wearing her glasses more and more again lately. When Emmy had been younger she had always been a little to nosy about everything in her reach, so Felicity had stopped wearing her glasses when their little girl had been four months old.

She took another look in the mirror. Felicity looked just as tired and exhausted as she felt. Well, Oliver knew her when she looked tired and exhausted, so she probably wouldn’t have to put any make-up on. It wasn’t a first date after all even if the butterflies in her stomach made her feel that way, she thought while she went back downstairs with her phone as the only source of light again.

Felicity could see the two candles on the small table right next to the door even before she had reached the bottom of the stairs. Smiling, she went over to the table and found another envelope with her name written on it.

_Thank you for letting me do this for us._

_Please take the direct way into the kitchen. The path of roses and electric candles – yes, I have learned – will lead you the way._

Felicity’s smile only grew wider. Oliver had once planned an evening for the two of them with a lot of real candles. It had been nice, only that Felicity hadn’t been able to relax even for the shortest moment to enjoy Oliver’s gentle kisses and touches, always afraid the candles could burn the house down. So Oliver had to blow out every single one of them before they had been able to continue. Shaking her head at the memory, she followed the path Oliver had indeed marked with roses and electric candles. Like she didn’t know where the kitchen was in her own home!

The kitchen was at least lighter than the entrance had been, Felicity thought when she stepped in. A steaming cup of – unfortunately not coffee she could tell from the smell alone – hot chocolate was waiting for her on the table, a photo album she had never seen before next to it. The light was dimmed, but it was enough to see the envelope that leaned against the cup.

_Sit down, put up your feet and relax a little. Your day has certainly been exhausting, so enjoy your little me time, drink the cup of hot chocolate (I know you would have preferred coffee, but … you know, pregnancy) and take a look at that photo album. It’s just for you._

God, what had she done to deserve a man like Oliver?, Felicity wondered when she sat down and put up her feet, just like Oliver had told her. She pulled the cup of hot chocolate closer, taking a sip. It wasn’t as good as coffee, but it wasn’t bad either, she thought before putting the cup away to take a closer look at the photo album.

As soon as she opened the book and took a look at the first photo, which was the first photo they had taken when they had finally become a couple, she knew what Oliver had meant with his last sentence in the latest letter. The album was only for her because it was created with photos that nobody but Oliver and she had ever seen. Oliver had always taken care that there were certain photos, his favorite ones, which nobody but the two of them got to see. The first picture of them had been one of those. Right between round three and round four in their first night together, Felicity had reached for her phone and wanted to take a photo, much to Oliver’s displeasure. So his face was mostly hidden in the juncture of her neck while Felicity smiled happily into the camera.

The album portrayed the journey they had made together since the day she had decided to just take what she wanted or who she wanted for that matter and tell Oliver that he couldn’t push her away any longer. Photos of evenings they had just spent snuggled on the couch. Photos of Oliver and the engagement ring on her finger since he had been addicted to touch it from the moment he had put it there. Photos of their wedding. Photos of the first pregnancy. Photos of the first time after Emmy’s birth, including the first family photo. Photos of their last vacation on Hawaii. Photos of so many other precious moments of the life they had built. Photos that awakened so many precious memories that it almost made tears form in her eyes.

Oliver must have put a lot of time and work into this. Felicity knew that Oliver had a lot more photos than just these. So he must have even taken the time to pick out the ones that were worth being included in this album. It was… overwhelming to say the least. Felicity had no idea how much time it had taken to reach the last page, but she just took the last sip of the hot chocolate when she opened the last page.

_I hope you feel relaxed now. You can come into the living room whenever you like to. If you need more time, take it. I’ll wait for you._

Felicity had to take a deep breath. Especially the last sentence had a great effect on her. After everything they had been through lately, the sentence meant a lot more than one could think. It didn’t just mean that he would wait the ten more minutes she might need to come into the living room, but wait for her whenever she needed him to wait for her. Like when a depression was making her push him away from her.

Slowly she approached the door to the living room, breathed in deeply once more and opened it.

“Wow!”

Oliver stood in the middle of what was supposed to be their living room even if it didn’t look like that right now. Their usual living room furniture was moved to the walls to make room for their bed. There was a plate with baked goods on the mattress. Oliver stood in a sea of roses, surrounded by more electric candles. As soon as her eyes landed on him, he approached her, embraced her in his strong arms and pressed a kiss to her lips.

“Why exactly are you looking like this, when I look like this?” she asked, cocking her head and gesturing between the two of them to point out the contrast of her yoga pants and his expensive suit. She pushed the lapel of the jacket aside to reveal the tuxes and purred like a cat. “You even wear tuxes. Someone is definitely going to get laid tonight… well, actually we both will be because we will both be part of the sex, but... that was not… what I wanted to say… although it must have been said, but what I really meant to say was, Oliver, why are you wearing a suit when I wear this? You should have told me to dress up and-“

“You are beautiful,” he interrupted her babble, kissing her gently and unhurriedly. He pulled back slightly to smile at her again.

“Liar,” she whispered, but he only chuckled, framed her face with his hands and kissed her once more.

When Oliver moved back this time, he took one her hands in his and noticed the quiet music that was playing. This man, who could easily snap necks take out even the most dangerous criminals, was a giant sap when it came to her, Felicity thought, but she wouldn’t want to have it any other way. It was just so cute that he had even remembered to switch on some music for the atmosphere. He put one hand to her waist and started swaying slightly.

“Oliver, are you dancing with me?” she asked teasingly.

Oliver smiled down at her and kissed her nose before he answered, “Yes, I do.”

Smiling, she let her cheek fall to his chest, swaying in time to the music with him. So that was why he had encouraged her to go shopping with Thea. He had needed time to prepare their date. She didn’t even dare to ask how he had managed to carry their bed downstairs. All of this had probably cost the whole day to prepare. And it wasn’t even a special occasion. There were still four weeks to their wedding anniversary.

She put her chin to his chest, looking up at him. Oliver smiled at her lovingly, not saying a word for some time before he stated, “Felicity, this is me noticing you’re staring at me.”

Chuckling, she straightened onto her tiptoes and pressed a gentle kiss to the underside of his jaw, his stubble scratching and tickling her lips in the best way possible. He was just so adorable when he quoted himself from years back or sometimes even quoted her. He loved to do that, and she loved that he did that.

“Why are you doing all of this for me?” she finally asked. “When I read the ‘my dearest Felicity’ my first thought was that you let Emmy mess up my tablet, but now… she must have destroyed not only that, but also every other technology here, at QC and in the liar. And even then this would be pretty much effort to apologize, I guess.”

Oliver chuckled again. “No try to apologize for anything. This is me spoiling my wife because she deserves being spoilt more than any other person in this world.”

“Uh…” Felicity made. “So it is about getting laid tonight, right?”

Oliver let his head fall back to laugh in amusement, but he soon turned his gaze back to her and smiled. Their dancing movements stopped and Oliver took a tiny step back. Her hand slipped from his shoulder, and he hastily caught it with his, so he was holding both of her hands in his now. When their eyes met again, Felicity felt her heart skip a beat before it started racing in her chest, pounding against her ribs with that much power she was almost sure that they would break.

“Felicity,” he started, saying her name in the way that made her skin prickle and her breath hitch, “we went through a rough patch lately, but that didn’t change how I feel for you. If something has changed, then my feelings have only intensified in the meantime because now I really know the meaning of the promise we have given to each other almost three years ago. Even if we wrote our own vows and there was no ‘in sickness and in health’, I still count that as a part of the promise I made when I married you. Besides, it might sound weird, but I am actually kind of glad that I got the chance to be there for you, maybe not as much as you are always there for me, but still.”

Felicity nodded. She didn’t know what exactly he was trying tell her or what exactly he intended with his little speech. Still, she felt her breath shorten and her heartbeat fasten. Something about the way he looked at her made her whole body tingle in excitement. The moment Oliver’s smile grew and he went down on his knee, never breaking the eye contact and still holding her hands in his, she felt tears forming in her eyes and a breathy “oh my God” fell from her lips.

“Felicity,” Oliver started once more. “After these three years we have shared now, after the ups and downs of our marriage, with Emmy and the second baby on the way-“

“A baby that moved like crazy right now by the way,” Felicity interrupted, putting his hands to her belly. “Can you feel it?”

“No,” he said sadly, but leaned forward to press a kiss to the bump and whispered, “Hey, baby, I know you are just excited as I am right now, but can you please try to share mommy’s attention with me for the next few minutes. I am trying to propose here.”

“Oliver, the baby can’t hear you yet,” Felicity said before she frowned, “but it stopped moving. That’s… kind of scary. Anyway, I didn’t want to interrupt you. Sorry.”

Chuckling, Oliver leaned back and looked up at Felicity again. Smiling, he continued where their unborn baby’s movements had interrupted them before, “Felicity, after all of… that… I still love you. You are still the love of my life and I still can’t picture my life without you. So will you please marry me again?”

“Yes!” she exclaimed.

She was already bending her knees to join him on the floor when Oliver got up and scooped her up in his arms, swirling her around like crazy. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his pulse point. Their joined happy laughter ended in a screech, though, when Oliver let them fall to the bed, still not letting go of Felicity. They bounced up and down on the mattress some times before Oliver leaned over her and kissed her fiercely, securing her body to the mattress underneath his own.

Felicity opened her lips to his immediately. She pulled at the collar of his dress shirt to make him come closer. God, he tasted so deliciously. And he smelled so perfectly. She put a hand to the back of his neck, gently grasping his hair to make his lips stay where they were on hers. She didn’t want to break the kiss just yet although her lungs were already burning with the need for air and her lips hurt slightly and were probably swollen from the passion of their kiss. It just felt too good to let go.

When the need for air was unbearable to stand any longer, their lips finally parted, but Oliver didn’t pull back very far. His lips still hovered over hers when he asked with the biggest smile on his face, “Is it weird that I am just as happy you said yes as I have been when I asked you the first time?”

“Is it weird that I am just as happy you asked me to marry you as I have been when you asked the first time?”

They smiled at each other happily before they said at the same time, “No.” They laughed when their lips met in another, gentler kiss.

Half an hour later they lay in bed together. Oliver had his shoes and jacket slipped off and the sleeves of his white dress shirt rolled up, so his strong arms were shown to advantage. Felicity absent-mindedly traced the vein on his forearms with the tips of her fingers while Oliver fed her one of the cupcakes he had baked himself. Who had known that man had actually baking skills?

“So…” she started before licking a bit of whipped cream from Oliver’s thumb, “when did you decide to propose to me once more?”

Oliver smiled. “I have thought about it for quite some time already, but I really made the decision on Emmy’s birthday, I think. I asked Lyla to take Emmy for one evening and started to implement all the plans I had made already. You know, I have always wanted to propose to you once more. I wanted to do one perfect proposal that really surprised you after you have totally ruined the first proposal I had planned for you.”

Frowning, Felicity tried to roll onto her stomach, but the belly made it impossible to do so, so she just stayed lying on her side, propped her head up onto her elbow and said, “I didn’t ruin the proposal you have planned out for me. You just couldn’t wait any longer and needed to propose..”

“You have been lingerie shopping. How was I supposed to wait any longer given those circumstances?”

“Oliver, you never saw the lingerie,” she said and grinned when he gave her a skeptical look. “At least you didn’t see it before you proposed. You just dragged me to bed as soon as I came home.”

“In that case I have to say that having sex with you totally ruined the whole proposal I had planned out.”

“Oh please!” Felicity said. “Like sex with me could ruin anything.”

Oliver laughed quietly, but leaned over to kiss her gently before he mumbled against her lips, “You’re right. Sex with you could never ruin anything. I love you by the way.”

“I love you, too,” she replied with a smile and opened her mouth, wordlessly requesting for more baked goods.

Felicity closed her eyes, enjoying the sweet taste on her tongue and the low music in her ears. This was so perfect, beyond perfect. The most perfect thing ever. And Oliver had all of this planned out just for her. Who else could say about themselves that they had a great husband like she had? The thought alone made her body tingle once more. The butterflies still hadn’t stopped to flutter in her stomach, and the baby had started to move again from the moment they had lain down in bed together. It actually felt like their little one was trying to catch the butterflies. It was a stupid thought because of course there were no butterflies in her stomach, but it felt like this and she could see the picture of their sweet, little baby with chubby cheeks sit in the grass and catch butterflies so clearly in her mind that she couldn’t stop smiling for even the shortest time.

“I think we should do a small ceremony,” Oliver interrupted her thoughts after a while and she opened her eyes to look into his. “Our original wedding has been small. I don’t want the renewal of our marriage covenant to be that much different. Our wedding was actually kind of perfect the way it has been. I think we should invite our usual squad. Maybe we can ask John to be our minister. He knows us the longest, and I think it’s a good idea to have a friend to it. It will be more personal. And I want to do it on our anniversary. Thea can plan everything, so you don’t have to bother with that. And after the party we will honeymoon once more, only that we will take Emmy with us this time. I think a family vacation would be nice before the baby is born.”

“You’ve put a lot of thought in this. What made you that sure that I was going say yes to your proposal?” she teased with a wide grin.

“I am just so cocksure of myself that I couldn’t imagine any other outcome,” he teased back, kissing her softly.

Felicity snorted. “Cocksure, hm?”

Grinning, Oliver bent down again, kissing her once more. This whole evening had turned out to be even better than he had planned. The romantic atmosphere, the light tone, the teasing. It was perfect. God, he wished every evening could be like this. Well, maybe they could Emmy to the scene if this would be their every evening. His little girl was just as much of an indispensable part of his life as Felicity and their newest, not yet born addition to the family was.

Felicity grabbed another cupcake and eyed it up before she took a look at Oliver and asked, “I am not choking on a ring if I eat his, right?”

“No,” Oliver said with a chuckle. “I’ve tried to steal at least one of the rings from you, but even in your sleep you formed your hand to a fist and started slapping me when I tried to take it off.”

“Wedding band stealer!” she hissed with a wink and then bit into the cupcake.

Oliver only chuckled and pulled a little jewelry box out of the pocket of his pants, placing it on the mattress in front of her. Felicity cocked her head at him and he laughed, saying, “You didn’t want to give me one of your rings, and I didn’t want to ask you with empty hands, so I thought this would be a nice alternative. But I ended up being so nervous that I forgot about it.”

“Poor thing,” Felicity said, patting his head. “Don’t worry, you can propose to me once again in a few years to make it perfect and hand the gift over at the right time.”

“Pfff,” Oliver made, “next time it’s your turn.”

“I proposed to you once,” she replied.

“When?”

“During our last vacation on Hawaii. I wrote ‘Marry me’ in the sand.”

“That wasn’t a proposal. We didn’t get married again after that.”

“We could have gotten married after that, but you stated that we already were married, and then we never talked about it again.”

“You should have been more rigid about it then.”

“Oh, shut up now. You are disturbing the concentration I need to open this present!” Felicity exclaimed with a grin and sat up, taking the small jewelry box. She looked back at Oliver, who looked kind of nervous now, before she opened it. “Wow, that’s beautiful.”

There was a necklace put on velvety. It was a long, but very small white gold link chain with a pendant that looked suspiciously like a-

“Is that an arrowhead?” she asked, her fingertips moving over the small pendant.

“Yes,” Oliver answered hastily. “I made it from an arrowhead and I engraved our names and Emmy’s in Cyrillic. Okay, I let someone engrave it. Anyway, there is still more room of course, so we can let the baby’s name engrave later.”

“Cyrillic?”

“You love it when I speak Russian.”

“You love to speak Russian.”

“I love that you love when I speak Russian,” Oliver replied, grinning, and took the jewelry to put it around Felicity’s neck. The dull arrowhead rested in the valley between her breasts near to her heart.

“It’s perfect,” Felicity whispered, watching the pendant for a few more moments before she looked up at Oliver and leaned over to kiss him gently and unhurriedly. The kiss soon developed into a much more passionate one. Oliver’s teeth bit down on her bottom lip before his tongue moved over the soft skin to soothe the pain. When their lips parted, she crawled over the mattress and sat down in his lap, pushing her hands under his tuxes. “And now, Mr. Queen, we will take care of this, hm?”

“Oh, do your worst, Mrs. Queen.”

“Oh, I think it should be Miss Smoak right now, shouldn’t it?”

Oliver took a deep breath, looking up at Felicity with eyes full of arousal. She knew that he had always had a weakness for her surname although he had been more than happy when she had decided to adopt his last name three years ago.

“In that case I correct. Do your worst, Miss Smoak.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny thing: I decided to write this before a certain Arrow season 4 promo was released. Actually, the whole chapter (except for the muffins that were added later) was planned the day MG's tumblr account posted wedding dresses. I had everything planned out and then suddenly the photos were posted. Even if we knew it wasn't him, it was still funny because what had been the chances for such a coincidence? And then I lay in bed and read a comment februarygreen had written, "accusing" me of being MG and even if the question actually referred to my plans of angst, it still made me fall out of bed, laughing, because it was just so... funny at that moment. :D


	62. Baking

The first thought that flashed through Oliver’s mind when he entered his home after the long day of work was that his family was being attacked. The rattling sounds, the loud screeches, the horrible silence afterwards – it all hinted at an attack on his loved ones.

Immediately Oliver’s heartbeat fastened and his whole body went into fighting mode. When there was anyone who hurt his family, he would let that son of a bitch bleed. He didn’t care that he weren’t wearing his hood or any of the weapons he used, but he didn’t need any of them. They were just tools. He was the weapon.

He dropped his briefcase to the floor carelessly, slipped off the jacket of his suit while he was already running to the kitchen and was just about to barge into the room, when he heard his favorite voice in the word yell, “Frack!”

He stopped with his hand already on the door knob and listened when Felicity’s “Frack!” was soon repeated multiple times in some kind of happy singsong by their daughter Emmeline.

“No, no, Emmy,” Felicity’s voice was heard. “We are not saying those words, okay?”

“Frack, frack, frack! Frack,” Emmy kept singing, “frack, frack, frack, frack, frack!”

“Okay, Baby, listen,” Felicity said, “when daddy comes home and asks you who taught you that word, you say Uncle Barry, okay?”

“Uncle Barry?”

“Yes, Uncle Barry,” Felicity repeated.

Releasing a quiet, breathy laugh of relief, Oliver leaned his forehead against the door to the kitchen and then took a deep breath. He needed a moment to fully calm down. Whenever he thought for whatever reason that his family was in serious danger, it messed him up for a few minutes. Most of the times those fears by horrible nightmares Felicity woke him up from. Luckily, there were only rare real situation that put him through a horror like this. He was usually so used to living in this happy bubble with his family being close to him and yet safe that the fear of losing them just crashed over him when it came to his mind. Taking another deep breath, he opened the door –

and stood still, unable to do anything but stare at the mess in front of him. Unlike he had feared it wasn’t the kind of mess that could count as a normal result of a fight, but more like the kind of mess a really inexperienced, highly untalented person could make when said person tried to bake although he or she had basically no idea of baking at all. Half of the kitchen was covered in flour. It was everywhere on the floor, on the counters, in Emmy’s hair and Felicity’s face. Emmy sat in the middle of the kitchen island, surrounded by bowls and baking ingredients. Her hands and arms were covered with dough that she tried to lick off. Felicity meanwhile stood not far away from her daughter, stirring in one of the bowls while she was holding a book with the title ‘Bake to impress’ in front of her face.

Oliver leaned into the door frame and just watched the two of them, three of them if he counted that little human being that was growing in Felicity’s belly. Emmy seemed to enjoy the mess around her, but that didn’t surprise him. His daughter had often proved that she didn’t think too highly of tidiness. She loved to play in the mug and run around in the house, still wearing her dirt-covered gumboots, right after. Felicity meanwhile seemed very concentrated on what she read in that book. He had never seen her bake. She liked to cook, but baking had never been hers.

Well, that certainly explained the mess here.

“Need help?”

“Daddy!” Emmeline screeched and crawled over the kitchen island to the edge that was closest to him, reaching out her dough-covered arms for him to hold her.

Immediately he stepped forward and lifted her from the counter to hold her pressed tightly against his chest, reassuring himself that she was okay after the short panic attack he had had before. He kissed the crown of her head and only laughed when she fisted her little filthy hands around the fabric of his dress shirt, ruining the expensive piece of clothing. He couldn’t care less.

“Hey, you’re home early,” Felicity said, approaching him to kiss his cheek shortly. “I didn’t expect you to come home for another two or three hours.”

“Oh, I just thought I’d leave early to spend some time with you,” he answered honestly and shrugged his shoulders.

Felicity eyed him up thoroughly before she put a hand on his that rested on Emmy’s back and asked, “Are you okay? You look a little shaken.”

Of course Felicity could see right through him. He could have spent an hour outside the kitchen, trying to calm himself down from the moment of shock when he had thought they had been attacked, and still Felicity would have seen that there was something bugging him. He smiled, knowing how well his wife knew him, and leaned down, kissing her gently on the lips.

“Now I am great,” he whispered, kissing her once more. He then let Emmeline back on the floor and pressed a kiss to Felicity’s belly. “Hi, baby.”

He didn’t get the chance to say anything else to his unborn child, though, because immediately Emmy pushed herself between him and Felicity, hugging her mother and pressing her own face to the belly. Oliver would like to think that his little girl wanted him just for himself, but truth was that Emmeline was trying to prove to everyone that she was the baby’s greatest fan. She didn’t care too much about her dad lately and was very possessive of the baby that was growing inside her mother.

Sighing, Oliver lifted his gaze from his daughter and was reminded of the chaos around them once more. From the spot where he was standing now, in the middle of the kitchen, right next to the kitchen island, it only looked worse. Indefinable substances covered the countertops and the floor. How was an organized person like Felicity able to make such a mess?

“I repeat my question from before,” Oliver said. “Need help?”

“No,” Felicity answered, her lips stretching into a happy smile. “We got everything covered.”

Covered, Oliver thought quietly, was only their kitchen – with flour, dough and God knew what other substances. But he bit his tongue and nodded instead.

“I actually wanted to surprise you with this,” Felicity said, picking up a bowl from the floor. Dropping that had probably caused the noise that had made him panic before. “Well, not exactly with this because this has kind of turned into a terrible chaos, but I promise that the result will be worth it because this book has taught me how to bake at least as well as you do. Probably better.”

The last words were only muttered, but Oliver still heard them. He highly doubted that that was true, but he didn’t want to say anything about it since Felicity had obviously put a lot effort into this. And it was cute that she tried learning to bake for him.

“You don’t believe me,” she stated nonetheless.

“I-“

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him and pursed her lips, making him shut up. He pushed his hands to the pockets of his pants and looked down at the floor. Of course his face had given him away to her. She could just read him so easily. Even if that was great most of the times, there were a few moments when that could bring him trouble

“Okay, try the dough,” Felicity suggested, “because then you will see or rather taste that it is pretty good. It is really good. Great even!”

“Oh, I believe you,” he hurried to say when Felicity was trying to move past him. He wrapped his right arm around her waist and wiped a little bit of flour from her cheek before he lowered his head and kissed her.

It was a long, unhurried kiss. Felicity straightened up onto her tiptoes to press herself closer to him. Her lips opened and the tip of her tongue moved out to open his lips to hers. Their tongues met in a familiar dance. Quietly Felicity sighed into Oliver’s mouth, moving even closer like she was trying to melt her body with his. She was addicted to his kisses and she was addicted to the unborn baby’s reactions to it because she could feel it moving. It kicked and pressed itself closer to the inside of her skin, probably feeling the warmth that came from Oliver’s body. Eventually, their lips parted and Felicity leaned back slightly, looking up at him with her arms still wrapped around his waist.

“I will still prove you wrong about my baking skills,” she told him and freed herself from his arms to go to the kitchen island.

Emmy had used the times her parents had been distracted with themselves to climb on the countertops. There were traces of dough that showed where she had held onto the drawers to climb up there. Felicity took the bowl Emmy was stirring in eagerly and held it under Oliver’s nose, handing him a teaspoon. Oliver knew he had no choice. When Felicity thought that he doubted her skills, she always did her best to prove him wrong. Oliver actually doubted that she would prove him wrong again this time, but he gave her a chance and put some of the dough into his mouth.

“Great,” Oliver managed to say between clenched teeth, trying his best not to spit it out. The taste was not only gross, but downright awkward. There was something bitter and spicy in it. How could dough taste like that? It was supposed to be sweet. Besides, what were those strange clumps?

“Oh, come on, Oliver, it can’t be-“ Felicity started, but stopped when she first dipped her finger into the bowl and then put it to her mouth to taste the dough. Her eyes went wide before she scrunched her nose. “Oh God, I am a complete failure!”

“No, you are not!” Oliver replied with a chuckle, pulled her into his arms and peppered kisses to her cheeks, her jaw and everywhere else in her face. “And even if you were, you were still the cutest failure in this world.”

“That is not comforting me,” Felicity mumbled, but Oliver only chuckled again and kissed her lips shortly.

“You can’t be good at everything, I guess,” Oliver explained, earning him an angry look, that made him bite his tongue because she was just so cute when she looked at him like that. “You have other great talents.”

“I am sure it didn’t taste that bad when I tried it before,” Felicity whined, but then suddenly frowned and looked at Emmy who was cheerfully playing with some of the ingredients in her reach. Moving out of Oliver’s hold Felicity went to the kitchen island, grabbed Emmy’s legs gently and pulled her to the edge of the kitchen counter. “Emmy, did you mix something into this while mommy and daddy were…”

“Kissing and cuddling?” Oliver offered, earning him another of those angry looks that made him smile.

“Did you put something in here?” Felicity asked again.

Emmeline just giggled and slapped her little dough-covered hands in front of her eyes.

“I take that as a yes,” Felicity said with a sigh.

Oliver saw the sad expression that showed on his wife’s face when she looked down at the dough in the bowl once more. Hastily he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind, pressing a kiss to her temple.

“How about we will clean up some of the mess you two have made here and then give the baking another try. And this time I’ll be here to take care that everything will be perfect.”

“Fine,” Felicity said with a slight growl, “but don’t think that you can take over command here permanently. This is still my kitchen.”

“Heard and accepted,” Oliver said with a nod of his head.

So they started to prepare the kitchen and themselves for the second attempt to bake. While Felicity cleaned the countertops and some of the bowls and whatever else they needed, Oliver rolled up his sleeves and helped Emmeline to wash away the dough from her hands and arms. After that they began from new. Oliver had only taken a short look into the book Felicity had tried to use, and then stated that he knew what to do and put the book away.

Felicity insisted on doing most of the things on her own, so she limited Oliver’s task and only let him give instructions – she didn’t understand half of them – and let him keep an eye on Emmeline who was eagerly trying to mix everything in her reach into the dough. When Emmy started whining at being limited all the time, Felicity let her put the ingredients they needed into the bowl and stir everything together. Emmy used every chance to reach into the bowl and eat some of the dough.

“Okay, all you have to do know is mixing a pinch of salt to that and then that’s it,” Oliver said with a nod of his head, proudly looking at the love of his life. God, she was so proud of herself that it made his heart melt for her once more. When Felicity reached her hand out for one of the containers with the ingredients, Oliver said, “That’s the sugar, darling.”

“No, it’s not,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes at him. “This is the salt.”

“It’s the sugar. When you put the sugar in the bowl you took it from that container,” Oliver replied calmly.

“No, I did not because otherwise this would be-“ she stopped and stared at her finger from that she had just licked some of the dough, “salty.”

Whining, she let her head fall forward and moved her hands up to yell at whatever higher power didn’t mean well with her today. Unfortunately she moved that clumsily that the bowl ended up falling to the floor with a clattering noise that made all three of them wince.

“Frack!” Emmy exclaimed.

Oliver bit his tongue to stop himself from grinning when he remembered the scene he had overheard through the door when he had come home. Instead of giving away that he knew exactly who was responsible for teaching his little darling such a word, he asked, “Emmy, who taught you that word?”

He saw his daughter’s eyes look at her mother for a second and he could hear Felicity moving behind him, probably trying to remind their daughter of who she should blame for knowing that word.

“Mommy?”

“Traitor!” Felicity hissed, but hastily smiled when Oliver turned around to her with his eyebrows perked. She lifted their daughter from the kitchen counter. “Emmy needs to bathe. Do you want to-“

“I’ll clean up and you go and bathe Emmy,” Oliver interrupted. “You can teach her a few more curse words while you do so.”

“Oh, shut up!”

“Shut up!” Emmy repeated, putting on the same grim facial expression as her mother.

Felicity pursed her lips, pressed a kiss to Oliver’s jaw and mumbled something about really being the worst mother ever. Oliver looked after the two of them. He waited until they were out of reach before he allowed himself to chuckle. He definitely needed to encourage Felicity to bake a few more times because angry, pouting Felicity was beyond cute.

Sighing he straightened up and looked around. It was time to clean the mess his loved ones had made.

 

 

It took almost an hour to wash all the flour and all the other substances from Emmeline’s skin and her hair. God, she had even had dough in her belly button! How the hell had it come down there? Anyway, it took some time, but at least now Emmy was all clean and already dressed in her pajamas. She was allowed to watch her favorite cartoon series before Felicity would put her to bed.

When the two of them had snuggled up on the couch, Felicity shouted, “Oliver? Hey, you’re coming? Emmy’s cartoon starts in a minute.”

“Give me a second!” Oliver shouted back from the kitchen.

Emmy snuggled her face closer to Felicity’s belly. She could hear her daughter mumbling quiet words to her unborn sibling, but couldn’t understand what exactly she said since her whisper was too low to hear over the sounds from TV. Emmy talked just as much to the belly as Oliver did, maybe even more. Felicity was already excited about how the baby would react when it could finally hear them and move towards their voices or anything.

When the opening music to the cartoon started, Felicity shouted again, “Oliver? Move your pretty butt over here!”

“Already here,” Oliver replied.

“I started to think you were getting lost in the kitchen,” Felicity said teasingly and turned her head to look at him and tease him some more, but frowned instead when she was the plate with muffins in his hand. “You are kidding me, right?”

“It’s nothing special. There wasn’t any time for something special,” He said.

Grinning, he put the plate on the table, gave one muffin to Emmy, one to Felicity and then leaned back with a third one in his hand for himself. He pulled Emmy into his lap, put an arm around Felicity’s shoulder and kissed her temple. All the time he smiled smugly. Felicity bit into her muffin, realizing that it was one of the most delicious things she had ever eaten.

“I hate you,” she grumbled.

“You love me,” Oliver replied, his eyes still on the TV.

“Not anymore,” Felicity didn’t let go. “I hate you now.”

“No you don’t.”

“You can’t know that.”

“Of course I can,” Oliver replied, turning his head towards her. He lowered his lips to the soft skin right under her ear to kiss the spot gently before he whispered, “Because there are goosebumps all over your skin from that little kiss.”

He was right. Her whole skin was prickling from the touch of his lips against her skin. When she turned her head to look at him, Oliver was already staring at the screen again. Sighing, Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder and immediately his lips moved to the top of her head.

“I still hate you,” Felicity grumbled again.

Oliver only chuckled and replied, “I love you, too.”

They continued watching the cartoon in silence until Emmy start started rubbing her muffin against Felicity’s belly, so small crumbs of the baked good fell to the floor and to the couch.

“Emmeline, what are you doing?” Felicity asked, gently grabbing her daughter’s wrist to make her stop.

Emmy frowned and looked at her parents like the answer was the most obvious thing in the world before she answered, “Baby want cake.”


	63. Protecting who you love

“Stop moving that much!” Felicity hissed when Oliver made a step to the side. She grabbed the fabric of his shirt to pull him back in front of her, but given his ridiculous strength, he didn’t move a bit, so she hurried to get back behind him, hiding behind his broad chest. “They will see me!”

“And that would be so bad because…?”

“I told you why they can’t see me!” Felicity hissed again and tried to push herself even closer to Oliver, so her body would melt with his and whenever he would move, so would she. “They shouldn’t even see you or Emmy!”

“You do realize that your behavior is kind of ridiculous, right?”

Felicity punched him in the back, but it only made Oliver chuckle. How could he be so calm? How could he stand there with their little, helpless Emmy on his shoulders and carelessly laugh at her while they were in a danger like this? How could he of all people be all calm in this situation? That man had lived on a hellish island, had been put through hell, had experienced several levels of torture and pain and still he stood there, laughing at her like her worries were irrational.

“Oliver, this isn’t funny!” she tried to make him aware of the danger they were in once again. “Could we please go now before they notice us?”

“Felicity, Emmy is having fun here,” Oliver replied when Emmeline giggled happily and moved on Oliver’s shoulders. He hastily put a hand to her back to prevent her from falling off his shoulders and hitting the ground.

“Emmy is having fun here because she is too young to see the danger. She is fooled by their fluffy, outward appearance.”

“Felicity, you know I love you, but you’re acting a little crazy here.”

Felicity opened her mouth to say something, but couldn’t find any words to express how wrong Oliver was, so she shut it again and just stared at the back of his neck, cursing him and his careless behavior. She was sure that he could protect them if they were attacked, but they were in the majority and Oliver couldn’t fight all of them at once. It was impossible. So they should leave before they were attacked. But Oliver kept standing there and it almost seemed like he tried to arouse their attention. When he pointed at their enemies and asked Emmy if she had seen the mother and her baby, Felicity frowned at him angrily.

“Are you trying to win an award as worst husband and father in the world? Because I could swear your actions could actually help you win an award like that. If that is what you want, I can tinker you one. Just say so, and you will get it.”

Sighing, Oliver turned around to her and only sighed when Felicity hastily adjusted his position in front of her. Emmy complained loudly that she couldn’t see anymore and stole Oliver’s cap to distract her from the boring view she got now.

“Felicity, you are being ridiculous.”

“I am not!” Felicity hissed, frowning at him angrily. “We – your daughter, your wife and your unborn child, the family you claim to love that much – are in actual danger and all you do is making fun of me. You promised on our wedding day that you will protect me if something like this ever happens. I don’t feel protected right now!”

Oliver started at her for a long moment before he said, “Emmy, can you hold onto my head please?”

Emmeline put his cap back to the top of his head before closing her arms around Oliver’s forehead. Oliver told her to tighten her grip three times before he carefully removed his hands from his daughter, who was now holding onto her father’s head intently. Oliver took a step towards Felicity, framed her face with his now free hands and kissed her gently. He could feel how tense she was and how even during their kiss her mind didn’t block out the thought about where they were and who they were with.

“Felicity, I love you and both our children more than anything, but there is no danger here,” he promised her, kissing her once more. “Besides, I am pretty sure I didn’t promise to protect you from fluffy zoo animals.”

“You promised me to protect me if kangaroos were ever going to take over the world and you have seen those animals. They are already trying to make you believe that there is no danger coming from them and as soon as you have fallen for them, they will knock you out and take over the world,” she explained.

Sighing, Oliver just shook his head again, put his arms around her and turned her around, so her back was pressed to his chest and she was facing the enclosure. She was struggling against his grip, whining with low voice, “No, Oliver! They will see- Oh my God! Oh my God, it looks at me! It will kill me!”

When her voice grew louder, he hastily let go of her. The first parents’ eyes already turned into their direction and since he didn’t want the few other children that were around to become scared because of Felicity he let her hide behind him again, only shaking his head about her. He loved her and he was the last person to make fun of anyone’s fears, but this was really absurd. Those were just kangaroos!

“Are they still looking at me?” she asked quietly.

“No,” Oliver said with a sigh and put his hands back to Emmy’s back, so she could let go of his head. “They aren’t looking. Hey, Emmy, can you still sing the song we’ve listened to in the car?”

“Going to zoo, see a kangaroo!” she sang with the brightest smile on her face and clapped her hands happily.

“But we didn’t come here to see kangaroos!” Felicity whined, pressing her face to Oliver’s back. “We came here to see all the other cute animals. So could we please go to see them instead? How about monkeys? Monkeys are great. They are intelligent and they actually do more things than just being freaky. So please?”

“But Emmy enjoys the kangaroos. Right, Emmy?” Oliver asked and Emmeline squealed happily.

“But I am scared and that increases my blood pressure which is certainly not good for the baby,” Felicity said in a whining tone. Making this about the baby was her last resort, especially because it was actually kind of mean to do that, but at least it worked.

“Come one, Emmy, let’s go and watch the monkey. We can come back to the kangaroos later, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy said.

They had barely taken a few steps when Felicity noticed that he was still laughing at her. His lips were pressed together tightly, but she could still see that he was laughing, no matter how hard he was trying to hold it back. She threw him an angry glare, saying, “You’re a jerk!”

“Jerk! Jerk! Jerk!” Emmy repeated and wiggled on Oliver’s shoulders until he lifted her over his head and put her back to the floor. Immediately she ran ahead.

Oliver put an arm around Felicity’s shoulders, pulling her closer. Although she was still pissed at him for laughing, she snuggled her cheek to his shoulder and wrapped both her arms around his waist. Oliver pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, whispering, “We have an intermediate result of zero to three on teaching Emmy words she’s not supposed to learn.”

“I didn’t teach her three words,” Felicity mumbled.

“Frack, shut up and now jerk,” Oliver listed.

Felicity mumbled something more into his shoulder, but he couldn’t understand and was kind of sure that he wasn’t supposed to hear it anyway, so he just tightened his hold on his wife and put his head to hers, his eyes never drifting away from Emmy.

It had been a spontaneous idea to go to the zoo. Oliver hadn’t felt like going to work today and it was the first warmer day this year, unlikely warm for the first week or March actually, so he had suggested to make this a family day and go to the zoo. Felicity had started to tell him about the duties of a good CEO, but he had objected and asked what fun it would be to be the boss if he couldn’t take a day off when he felt like it. That had led Felicity to another long lecture about a CEO’s duties. He had only been able to persuade her to give in to his idea by looking at her with his best puppy eyes.

“Daddy, go see lions!” Emmy yelled and pointed at the sign with the lions.

“Yes, Oliver, let’s go to see the lions again,” Felicity agreed with her daughter and looked at Oliver with a satisfied smile.

They had been at the lions’ enclosure right when they had come here. The lioness had been way too happy about Emmeline’s presence for Oliver’s liking. As soon as she had seen the toddler with her nose pressed against the glass, she had come over and licked the glass like she had been trying to eat Emmy. While Felicity had enjoyed that Oliver had been everything but pleased. Looking back, it made Oliver’s behavior towards her and her fear of kangaroos only worse. Well, or maybe she had deserved the teasing since she had teased him about his displeasure, too.

“No, we’ve already been at the lions’ enclosure,” Oliver said, nervously massaging the back of his neck. “Let’s go see the monkeys.”

“Daddy, grrr!” Emmeline mimicked the lion’s roar, just as good as her mother had done when Oliver had been in a discussion with Isabel Rochev a few years ago, Oliver thought.

“See, you are already a lion. Let’s see if the monkeys get scared of you,” Oliver suggested, and immediately Emmeline ran off to where the sign with the monkeys led her to their enclosure.

“You are unbelievable lucky, you know that?” Felicity asked.

Although he knew that she was actually talking about the prevention of another visit at the lions, he smiled at her words and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, pulling her even closer. He wasn’t only lucky, but more the by far luckiest man in the world. He had a great wife, a loving daughter and another perfect child on the way.

As soon as the gorillas were in sight, Emmeline ran towards the glass to press her face against it and watch the animals from as close as she could. Oliver and Felicity followed, but stayed a few feet back to not block the view for possible other children who might come to watch the animals. Oliver positioned himself behind Felicity and wrapped his arms around her, his hands resting on the swell of her stomach. He still hadn’t felt his baby kick, and the more time passed, the more envious he got at Felicity who felt every slight move of their unborn child. Instead of verbalizing that thought, he just spent more time touching the bump and hoping for a kick, though.

They hadn’t stood in front of the glass for long before a young gorilla baby came closer to the glass. The little animal sat down right in front of Emmeline, looking at her interestedly. Emmy smiled at her parents happily before she turned back to the gorilla that started to cover itself with some of the straw from the floor. When Emmy laughed and put her hands against the window, the gorilla baby hid in an empty tree stump, only sneaking out every once in awhile like it was trying to make Emmy laugh because the toddler was so amused she barely breathed between the fits of laughter.

Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder with a sigh and happily watched her daughter play with the gorilla. It was a heartwarming sight. Emmeline giggled and ran from one side to the other to see the gorilla better. The gorilla baby jumped out of the tree stump and tried to hide behind little bushes in the meantime.

“In a few months we might be able to see something like this every day,” Oliver whispered into Felicity’s ear and gently stroked the swell of her stomach. His lips lowered to the side of her neck for a long, soft kiss to her pulse point before he rested his chin on her shoulder and continued, “Emmy and our little one here playing hide and seek or anything else. I can’t wait to see our big girl doing all the great big sister stuff.”

Felicity snorted. “You do realize that the baby is actually kind of very tiny and unable to play in its first months? Besides, once the baby is born, you are probably totally uninteresting for Emmeline. Sure you are ready to give that up?”

Oliver sighed softly and kissed Felicity’s neck shortly before he refocused his gaze on his daughter and the gorilla baby. His voice was barely audible when he answered, “If I get to see something like this just once, it is worth losing the first place in her heart to the baby. She is going to be the best big sister our baby can hope for.”

“Yes, she is,” Felicity agreed and put her hands on top of his larger ones. “She is already so excited.”

“And I will just take the first place in the new baby’s heart to comfort myself,” Oliver said with a sigh. “I might accept the second place behind Emmeline, but I am definitely going to be its favorite parent.”

“Over my dead body are you going to be the baby’s favorite parent, too. You already got Emmy. She’s a daddy’s girl. This baby is going to be all mine,” she replied.

“Emmy is more interested in you than in me, lately. So since you are her favorite now, I am going to be the baby’s favorite. It’s only fair.”

“Emmeline is only interested in the baby. It has nothing to do with me,” Felicity replied. “Besides, you don’t get to have all the cute baby time. This child is totally mine.”

“We are going to see about that,” Oliver answered with a chuckle and peppered a few short kisses to Felicity’s jaw.

Fighting about who was going to be the baby’s favorite parent had been something they had done a lot during the first pregnancy. It had been fun then and it still was fun now because they knew that the baby was going to love both of them, just like Emmy loved both of them. There had been a time when she had favored Oliver, but it had always been clear to both of them that she loved Felicity just the same. It was just that she had had Felicity around her all morning and afternoon, so when Oliver had come home after work or been at home during the weekend, Emmy had wanted to spend more time with her daddy. But she loved both of them. Clearly.

When the gorilla momma came and took the baby away, Emmeline waved goodbye and then turned to her parents. She crossed the distance and tugged at the hem of Felicity’s dress to make her mother lift her from the floor and take her into her arms. Since Felicity had trouble with some – not that bad but still there – pain in her back, it was Oliver who lifted her from the floor and held the toddler girl between her mother and himself.

“Daddy, why she take baby?” Emmeline asked, looking at her father sad.

“You know, mommies and daddies want to protect their babies,” Oliver explained. “Maybe the gorilla mommy thought that you were a danger to her baby.”

“Like kangaroos to mommy and baby?”

“No, kangaroos are no real dange- Ouch!” Oliver interrupted when Felicity boxed him into the side. She hadn’t put much force in the punch, but she knew exactly that there was a slight bruise from his last night in the Arrow cave.

“Stop telling our daughter that there are no dangers coming from kangaroos. Kangaroos are dangerous, Oliver.”

Oliver sighed. Felicity would never let that go if he didn’t agree with her. So he turned his gaze back towards Emmy and said, “Yes, Emmy, just like kangaroos are a danger to mommy and the baby.”

It wasn’t even a lie, Oliver realized the longer he thought about it. Emmeline was as much of a danger to the gorilla baby as kangaroos were to Felicity and the baby – not at all.

“You protect me?” Emmy continued to ask.

Oliver nodded and kissed both of her cheeks before he replied, “Of course I will protect you. From everything. At every time.”

“Unless there are evil kangaroos,” Felicity murmured. “Because then he is just going to laugh at you.”

“Mommy protect me to?”

“Mommy protects you, too,” Oliver said with a nod of his head.

“And baby?”

“The both of us will also protect the baby,” Oliver answered.

Emmy looked at her father without saying a word for some time. Then she turned her head and looked at Felicity and finally at the baby bump before she returned her eyes to her father and said with all earnestness a two year old could show, “I protect baby, too.”


	64. Letting ourselves be surprised?

“You’re ready?” the doctor asked, holding the bottle of ultrasound gel, so it hovered over Felicity’s baby belly. Dr. Hampton waited until she nodded before he squeezed the bottle and let a bit of the cold gel drop onto Felicity’s stomach.

Felicity winced slightly at the sudden cold, and immediately Oliver’s free hand lifted to her hair, stroking it in what was probably supposed to be a comforting gesture. Oliver sat right next to the examination couch Felicity was lying on with the hem of her shirt pushed up over her belly. He held on of her hands in his, the other now stroking her hair. Although he seemed to believe that stroking her hair gave her comfort he obviously didn’t know she didn’t need, Felicity knew exactly that he tried to calm himself down with the even movement of his hand.

The closer Dr. Hampton’s hand that held the ultrasound scanner moved to her stomach now, the tighter Oliver’s grip on her hand was becoming. His eyes were focused on the doctor’s hand like it was holding the key to his life. The scanner still hadn’t touched Felicity’s skin when she half hissed, half whined, “Oliver, you’re breaking my hand.”

Immediately Oliver’s hand let go of her and he pressed the arm to his chest like he had just burnt himself. The hand that had been stroking her hair stayed near her head, but only his fingertips were touching her hair still. He looked like a little child that had just been caught stealing sweets from the kitchen cabinet it wasn’t supposed to even look at. Laughing, Felicity took his hand, kissed his knuckles and kissed them gently before she rested their entwined fingers on top of her chest near to her heart and nodded towards the doctor once again. While Dr. Hampton finally put the scanner to her stomach and started spreading the gel on her naked skin, Oliver leaned forward and pressed a firm kiss to her temple, whispering a barely audible “Sorry” into her ear, but she only turned her head and smiled at him.

Oliver had been so excited about the appointment. He was always excited when it seemed like they were taking steps that actually brought them closer to the birth of their baby. He had been like this when she had been pregnant with Emmeline and he was still that excited now that she was pregnant with their second child. He hadn’t lost any of the enthusiasm he had shown then.

“Okay, here we go,” Dr. Hampton said.

Quickly both, Oliver and Felicity, turned their heads to the monitor where they could now watch the image of their unborn baby. The even sound of its quick heartbeat sounded through the room. If Oliver could, he would record the sound and listen to it on his ipod whenever he felt miserable. This sound was a sign of life – literally.

“So…” Dr. Hampton said with a smile, moving one of his hands to the screen. “Here we have the baby’s head, the spine, feet, hands. Everything looks fine from what I can see here.”

Oliver stared at the screen and tried to memorize every little detail he could see of the baby. His baby. How was it even possible to be that excited for a second baby? Shouldn’t all the nervousness decrease with every more baby because you were used to the procedure and knew what to expect? Oliver certainly didn’t feel that way. He felt like this was his first child. He felt like he had felt when Felicity had been pregnant with Emmeline. He was just as excited and nervous as he had been more than two years ago.

“Look, it sucks its thumb,” Oliver almost whispered.

Instead of keeping her eyes on the screen, Felicity turned her head to look at him. She smiled when she saw the adoration and love in her husband’s eyes. He was already so in love with their baby. She could watch him look at the display like this forever. It took Oliver a while before he noticed that Felicity was staring at him instead of their baby, and he turned his head to look back at her.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered.

“I love you, too,” Oliver whispered back and lowered his lips to hers, so he could kiss her softly and gently, thanking her for the gift she was making him with this baby.

If anyone had asked him a few years back if he could picture himself being a married man and a father with another baby on the way, he would have laughed ironically. There were still days that made him feel like all of this was a dream and he would wake up in the middle of the night, lying on the floor of the foundry. But all it needed was one of Felicity’s smile or one of Emmy’s sweet kisses and everything felt real again.

“Do you want to know if it is a boy or a girl?” Dr. Hampton asked.

“Absolutely,” Oliver said almost breathlessly at the same time Felicity answered with a slight laugh in her voice, “Oh, no!”

Felicity and Oliver looked at each other in surprise. “You do?” Felicity asked the same moment Oliver asked, “You don’t?” Oliver pressed a kiss to Felicity’s forehead, and she could feel his body shaking from laughter. It was just so typical for them to have different opinions on something like this. They hadn’t talked about whether they wanted to know if the baby was a girl or a boy. Felicity had just assumed that after they had let themselves be surprised with Emmeline’s birth, they’d do the same with their second baby.

“How about I take a quick look at another patient, and the two of you discuss whether you want to know in the meantime?” Dr. Hampton asked.

“That would be nice. Thank you,” Felicity said.

They waited until the door was closed behind the doctor before Felicity turned her head back to Oliver, asking, “You really want to know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

“You don’t want to know?” Oliver asked back. “You really want to hear all our friends complaining about that we don’t tell them because they don’t believe us when we tell them that even we don’t know?”

“Even if we let the doctor tell us, I wouldn’t want anyone to know if it’s a boy or a girl,” Felicity explained. “Being surprised is so much more fun and I don’t want our child to grow up in all those gender clichés. As soon as everyone knows, every gift for the baby will pink or blue.”

Oliver opened his mouth to say something, closed it again and opened it once more, but again not a sound came out. Never had he ever considered that Felicity wanted to go through all the torture of not knowing if the baby was a boy or a girl until the tiny human being was born again. It wasn’t like it made a difference if it was a boy or a girl. He loved Emmy. He would love another girl and he would love his first boy. He just… wanted to know.

“We could spare a lot of time,” Oliver said after a while. “If we know if it’s a boy or girl we know that we only have to pick one name. I mean we still have a boy’s name in store because Emmy turned out to be a girl, but… you know… if we know that it’s a boy this time… we didn’t have to… don’t get me wrong! Discussing names with you was fun… real fun and everything… but…”

“You’re cute when you speak in sentence fragments,” Felicity interrupted with a happy smile.

“I don’t talk in sentence fragments,” Oliver said pouting slightly.

“You do,” Felicity whispered, kissing the knuckles of his hand like she had when he had held onto hers too tightly before. “But just for me.”

Although he was looking down at the floor, Felicity could see that he was smiling. He knew that he babbled sometimes, but he didn’t like to admit it. Talking in sentence fragments was Felicity’s habit, not his. He had talked in sentence fragments when he had first asked her out, though. That had been the first time she had noticed it.

“I know finding a name for a baby girl won’t be easy,” she said after a while, squeezing his hand until he looked at her, “but I don’t want to miss that. Because as exhausting as it was, it was also fun, wasn’t it? It was fun when we finally found the name.”

“Yes, it was fun when we found the name,” Oliver agreed with a nod of his head. “Before that not so much.”

Felicity had to bite her tongue to not grin at the memories. They really had had trouble to find a name for a baby girl. They had liked so different names that Felicity had already started joking that they had had to pray for a boy or invent a new name. At the end she had found the name Emmeline on the internet – a perfect compromise between Felicity’s favored name Emma and Oliver’s favorite Evelyn.

“Hey, if you don’t want to discuss baby girl names, you can always leave the choice up to me, you know?” she suggested with the biggest grin on her full lips.

“Never,” he whispered before kissing her gently.

Their lips were still locked to each other’s when the door opened and Dr. Hampton cleared his throat to call their attention to him. When their eyes turned in his direction he asked, “Made a decision?”

“We will wait,” Oliver answered, squeezing Felicity’s hand.

“Thank you,” she whispered, and Oliver sighed.

They were half through the pregnancy at the end of the week, Oliver thought. So there were twenty more weeks without knowing if it was a boy or a girl. He would get through that. It would be terribly hard, but he would get through that. He didn’t have a choice because if this was what Felicity wanted then he was determined to accept it. There was nothing he wouldn’t do to make her happy.

Well, nothing except for letting her choose the baby’s name.

“How about I will write down if it’s a boy or a girl,” Dr. Hampton said, looking at Oliver who probably didn’t seem too happy at the thought to wait, “and if you change your mind about this, you call and we tell you the baby’s sex.”

“Sounds fair,” Oliver said with a nod and pressed his lips together when he saw Felicity’s face. She looked at him with her eyes narrowed. “What?”

“Oliver, if you call them without my allowance, I will tell John and everyone else that you cried actual tears when you dropped off Emmy at her friend’s place and she told you to go.”

No joke – really happened. Emmeline had been invited to another child from the toddler swim group and when Oliver had talked to the parents when he had been dropping her there, Emmy had walked towards him and told him that he should leave now because he was embarrassing. Felicity doubted that Emmy had really said the last part, but Oliver had said that he had seen it in their daughter’s eyes. Two years old and already independent. Only a bowl of mint chocolate chips ice cream had helped him through that.

“I would never mess with you,” Oliver said seriously.

She could see the amusement he tried to hide, but still just nodded shortly. “You better don’t.”

They said goodbye to the doctor and left the practice. On their way out Oliver whispered, “You do know that you’re really sexy when you threaten me, right?”

Felicity smiled at him over her shoulder, whispering, “Take me home and I might threaten you some more.”

Oliver did take her home. Quickly.


	65. Old and new

“You are really beautiful, Mrs. Queen,” the stylist said, gesturing towards the full-length mirror to make Felicity see the truth of those words for herself.

“Oh my god, Felicity!” Thea breathed, slapping one hand in front of her lips to suppress a quiet sob that threatened to escape them. Her eyes glanced with tears.

“You’re pretty, Aunt Felicity,” Sara stated with a cute smile, kneeling on one of the couches and leaning over the backrest to see as much from what was happening here as possible.

Smiling, Felicity turned towards the mirror, but instead of looking into it to see whether they were right and she indeed looked as beautiful as she felt, she looked at Emmeline. The two-year-old was wearing a puffy, white dress. She stood in front of the mirror, her back now turned to the glass of it, and stared at her mother with opened mouth.

“What do you think, Emmy?” Felicity asked. “Do you like it?”

It took the little girl a few more seconds before she started giggling and answered, “Like a princess.”

Felicity smiled. Emmeline’s and Oliver’s opinions were the most important ones. They always were, but at a day like this even more. Four weeks ago Oliver had proposed a second wedding to her in the most romantic way. It still made her heart pound like crazy and made the corners of her lips twitch into a happy smile. He was the most perfect husband and the by far best father she could wish for her babies, she thought, and caressed the baby belly with her hand. Today, the day of their third wedding anniversary, they were going to renew their marriage convent.

They had imagined a small ceremony with a reception right after. It had been supposed to take place at their home or maybe Verdant which had been their second home for so long, but since they had left all the planning to Thea, a lot of things had turned out different than how they had been supposed to be. So although Thea had tried to follow their wishes as good as possible, she had gone a little overboard with what she had planned for today. She had rented a small mansion for the ceremony and the reception. She had bought fancy dresses for Emmy and Sara, who were going to be the most adorable flower girls in history, and a stunning wedding dress for Felicity. And she had organized a stylist to do Felicity’s hair and makeup.

So when Felicity looked into the mirror, a distinctly prettier version of herself smiled back at her happily. Thea had picked a beautiful dress with embroidery. It was backless and had a train, but what Felicity loved most about it was that the ever growing baby belly looked perfect in it. It was like the swell of her stomach was accented without making her look fat. She just looked… pregnant. Pregnant but beautiful.

“It’d actually say you look more like a queen than like a princess – pun intended,” Thea explained and stepped closer to adjust the train of the dress.

“Mummy, help!” Emmy called, stepping closer in front of her mother and reaching out her arms for her, holding a bracelet in one of her hands.

Carefully Felicity crouched down and helped Emmeline to put on the bracelet. She had never seen it, so she just assumed that Thea had bought her the expensive looking jewelry.

“You like your dress?” Felicity asked, and Emmeline nodded fiercely before pirouetting. “You feel like a ballerina?”

“Aaand a princess,” the little girl added, giggling. “A ballerina princess.”

Felicity took her daughter’s hands in hers and pressed a kiss to her daughter’s lips. She knew that the classic order was to first get married and then have children, but she was kind of glad they got married again now that Emmy was born. Emmeline wouldn’t remember that day later, but Felicity and Oliver would and it was a great experience to have her here. What better witness of their love was there?

“Aunt Thea, phone!” Sara called, pointing at Thea’s phone on the table. “It’s Uncle Oliver!”

Thea hastily turned towards Felicity, saying, “Don’t worry! You are already married. If he gets cold feet now, it’s too late. You are already married.”

Felicity frowned. She highly doubted that Oliver was getting cold feet. When she had readied herself for the wedding three years ago, he had called only to ask if there was anything more she needed – a bowl of ice cream, a glass of champagne, earplugs to have a little rest from his sister.

“What? No! No, you can’t talk to Felicity. Ollie, what the hell are you thinking? Didn’t I teach you anything? The groom is not supposed to speak to the bride before the wedding… See? What do you mean? It’s not hear but see? ... Oh, now that you’ve said it… Okay, wait.”

Thea went over to Felicity and gave her the phone, saying, “Only two minutes. We have a strict plan.” Then she took Emmy’s hand and led her over to where Sara was still sitting on the couch and started to instruct the little girls on the duties of being a flower girl. Thea took weddings really serious.

“Hey,” Felicity said in the phone and turned away from the three of them.

“Hey,” Oliver said back. “I just wanted to ask if there is anything you need.”

Felicity smiled to herself. Yes, her husband was a giant sap.

“There is nothing I need,” she answered, “except for the second we say yes to come sooner.”

She couldn’t see it, but she knew that he was smiling, just like she did. Three years ago she had answered the exact same way when he had called.

“Felicity?”

“Oliver?”

“Is it strange that I am actually a little bit nervous?”

Felicity breathed a laugh. “It’s not strange. I’m actually kind of nervous, too.”

For a long moment nobody said anything. It was probably one of the perks of knowing and loving each other that silence could be as comfortable as words were.

“Felicity, hang up. It’s time!” Thea announced.

“I see you in a minute,” Felicity almost whispered.

“I’ll be waiting for you at the altar.”

 

Oliver’s heart was beating like crazy. When Thea sat down in the front and actually only row, he knew it was getting serious. They had decided against a best man and maid of honor because the little number of wedding guests – there were only Thea and Roy, the Diggles, Donna and Quentin, Laurel and of course their friends from Central City – it seemed redundant. They were all their best men and maids of honors.

The music started playing quietly and every pair of eyes in the room turned around to look at the door where Sara and Emmy now stepped into the room and started scattering rose petals down the path to the altar. Sara sat down next to Thea who took the basket with the left petals from Emmy and gestured her niece to go to Oliver.

“You look beautiful, princess,” Oliver whispered, lifting his daughter into his arms and kissing her lips before he focused on the door again.

How was it possible to be that nervous, he shortly wondered, but every thought died the moment he saw her. As soon as Felicity took the first step into the room, all he could think about was her and how beautiful she was. The dress made the pregnancy look even prettier on her. And Oliver could barely hold back the tears that formed in his eyes.

Their eyes were locked on each other’s the whole time. Their smiles matched each other’s. And Oliver was almost certain that even their hearts were beating in unison.

Felicity gave her bouquet to Thea and stepped in front of him. He leaned forward and pressed a short kiss to her cheek.

“You look beautiful,” he whispered, and let Emmeline down to the floor, so he could take both of Felicity’s hands in his. Her answer was a happy, teary smile. Emmy stood between them, leaning against Oliver’s legs.

He barely heard any of the words John spoke. Every thought in his mind revolved around Felicity right now. And considering the expression in her face, he was almost certain that she felt the same way. If there had ever been a doubt about whether this second wedding thing was a good idea, it was gone now. This was the best idea he had had in a while. This was the perfect way to tell Felicity again how much he loved her and how happy she still made him. Three years ago he had made the best decision of his life when he had married her.

Felicity perked her eyebrows in question, and he shortly wondered if she could read her mind and knew what he had thought, but then she whispered, “Oliver, your wedding vows.”

“What?” he asked irritated and looked from one side to the other to see everyone staring at him, including Emmeline.

“Daydreaming at your own wedding?” John asked and waved a paper in front of Oliver’s eyes. “The five promises Felicity wants you to make her.”

“Right,” Oliver said, taking the paper and taking a deep breath.

When they had gotten married three years ago, they had decided to write the wedding vows for each other. So Felicity had written down five promises Oliver needed to make her and Oliver had written down five promises Felicity needed to make him. They had decided to go with funnier ones this year because the hormones were driving Felicity crazy and she burst out in tears as soon as her emotional state condition changed slightly. Like it happened when she saw a puppy, listened to news about accidents or tasted salt that reminded her of tears.

Oliver unfolded the paper and entwined the fingers of his free hand with Felicity’s again, needing the touch to even be able to breathe.

“Felicity,” he started and hastily cleared his throat when he noticed that his voice was shaking, “I promise you to bear your signing under the shower and in the car. ... I should have read it before I promised it.”

Everyone was laughing, Felicity included although that still didn’t keep her from slapping his chest lightly.

“You’re supposed to make promises, not commenting them.”

“Fine,” Oliver chuckled. “So the next one… I promise to dance with you whenever you want it… Well, that will only make your feet hurt, not mine. I promise to… never touch your babies?”

Oliver’s gaze lowered to where Emmeline still leaned against his legs. He knew that Felicity had had to slap her hands in front of her eyes sometimes, so she didn’t have to see how he threw Emmy in the air or help her upside down while playing or anything like that, but he had always thought that he had done a pretty good job as a dad. So he looked at Felicity in question.

“My tech-babies of course,” she specified. “Emmy is not that destructible.”

“Okay…” Oliver said, still trying to process her words. “So… I promise that… whole not-touching-thing.”

It was just so Felicity to ask him to promise something like that.

“I promise you to not only to protect you from kangaroos when they want to take over the world, but also to never let them get near you or even look at you again,” he promised, biting his tongue at the memory of how crazy she had gone when they had been at the zoo and Felicity had seen the kangaroos. “And I promise to teach you the secret behind baking. …We should fireproof the house first.”

“Be careful, mister,” Felicity whispered dangerously quiet and narrowed her eyes at him, but Oliver only leaned forward and kissed her lips, whispering “I love you” against them.

“Felicity,” John said, holding out a piece of paper to her, “now your vows, please.”

Felicity took the paper, unfolding it with her best let’s-see-what-hubby-did-here-gaze. Oliver loved it.

“I promise to never try and bake again,” Felicity read, making everyone laugh, while she started hitting Oliver’s shoulder before she turned to John and asked, “Can I change my decision to get married to him. He’s mean!”

John tried his best to suppress and chuckle and answered, “Sorry. No right to return unsatisfactory products.”

Felicity grumbled something about how her baking hadn’t been that bad and he was just beyond mean, but winked at Oliver before she lowered her gaze and continued, “I promise to still sigh my most sexy sigh when you roll up your sleeves or lick your lips in fifty years.”

When she looked up at him, obviously intending to tease him about it, Oliver hurried to wet his lips with his tongue. He wasn’t disappointed. It was answered with the sexy sigh he had referred to.

“I promise to watch every baseball game with you,” she said, scrunching her nose. “Every single one?”

“Every single one.”

“Am I allowed to distract you?”

Oliver grinned widely. “The distraction is what makes the games so much fun.”

“Okay,” John interrupted before anything more could be said. “Please remember that there are children present. Neither needs the rest of us that kind of information. So, Felicity, if you could please continue.”

Felicity and Oliver both pressed their lips tightly together to not laugh. Felicity took a deep breath before she continued, “I promise to never send you on long business trips again.”

Felicity could be pretty determined when it came to the duties of a CEO. No skipping work to just spent a day on the couch. No skipping business trips only because they took longer than five days. No agreeing to bad contract conditions only to come home earlier. They needed to at least ease the strictness of the second rule.

“And I promise to not lose count on who’s teaching our children more evil words.”

Oliver turned around to the other’s mouthing, “She does.”

Felicity and Oliver gazed into each other’s eyes happily until John cleared his throat.

“Since you both still love each other enough to make the craziest promises, there is only one question left. Oliver, do you want to stay married to Felicity and renew your marriage convent?”

“Yes,” he answered, “I do.”

“Felicity, do you want to stay married to Oliver and renew your marriage convent?”

“I do.”

“In that case I will declare the two of you to husband and wi-“

“Stop!” Felicity suddenly yelled, holding out a hand for John to stop.

Everyone’s eyes turned to Felicity. Oliver leaned forward and whispered, “Felicity, we’re already married. It’s not like-“

“Pssst!” Felicity hushed, took his hand and put it to the swell of her stomach. “Can you feel it?”

He was just about to ask her what she meant when he indeed felt it. It was barely there, but he felt it. The baby was kicking. For weeks he had begged the baby to kick mommy more strongly to make daddy feel it. He had whispered loving words or encouraged the baby like a cheerleader, not listening to Felicity’s words about how much longer it would take for him to feel it and that the baby wouldn’t move in any voices’ direction for another month and that it was actually kind of unkind of him to tell the baby to kick her harder.

So feeling the baby kicking now was the best wedding present ever. He was finally able to feel it. Finally. He could feel tears rise into his eyes again.

“I want, too,” Emmy said, stepping forward and pushing her hands under his father’s to feel what he was able to feel. “My baby is moving.”

“Your baby?” Oliver asked.

“My baby,” she repeated, kissing the underside of the belly, making everyone release an “aw”.

Felicity lifted her gaze to look at Oliver. He smiled at her, still tears in his eyes. Just when he leaned forward and wanted to kiss Felicity, John pushed at his shoulder to make him take a step back.

“We are not at the kissing part yet,” he explained, shaking his head. “First I will pronounce that you are husband and wife. Still. And now you may kiss your bride.”

Oliver didn’t even wait a second. He immediately stepped forward, encaging Emmeline between both of her parents. He put one hand to his daughter’s head, the other to the side of Felicity’s face. He barely heard their guests getting up and applauding the not-so-newlywed couple. All that mattered right now was the part of his family he held in his arms.

They ignored their friend’s clearing throats and their comments about how they weren’t the only ones in the room and kept kissing until Sara asked, “Are they making another baby now?”

Felicity and Oliver broke away from each other, laughing. John had told them how Sara had asked all those baby questions as soon as she had learned that Felicity was having a baby. Well, and since babies were now the result of two people loving each other very much, kissing intensely could get you pregnant.

“Congratulations, guys,” John said, smiling at both of them. “Those wedding vows were great although I have to say that I was a little surprised. I thought at least one of you would make the other promise to be allowed to choose the baby’s name when it’s going to be a girl.”

Oliver and Felicity looked at each other with eyes wide opened.

“Damn it!” they said at the same time.

“Damn it!” Emmy repeated immediately.

“I guess the score just changed from three words by me and zero words by you to four words by me and one word by you,” Felicity said with a teasing smile. “See, I am a good wife. I keep count.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember that I am always open for story ideas about this little Queen family.
> 
> Oh, and I changed the title at least thirty times (tumblr readers might have actually seen it because I had posted the fic already when I realized that the extra word there had been in the title didn't mean what I thought it meant. :D So now it's just "Old and new").


	66. Worst decision ever

_The Travel_

Oliver sat on the edge of the mattress, his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands. His whole body trembled violently. His breaths were coming shortly and loudly through his mouth, not helping to calm down his rapidly beating heart. It broke Felicity’s heart to see him like that.

When they had decided to renew their marriage convent, Oliver had immediately started planning their second honeymoon. Felicity had pleaded with him to tell her where they were going, but Oliver had kept it a secret, no matter how seductive her strategies to make him talk had become or how cutely she had pouted at him. He had wanted it to be the perfect surprise for her.

Admittedly, Felicity had shortly doubted his plans when he had told her that they had twenty hours of flight ahead of them. Twenty hours in the small jet of the company with an excited two-year-old wasn’t exactly the kind of relaxing opening to their second honeymoon Felicity had had in mind. But Oliver had proved to have thought of everything. He had installed new games on Emmy’s toddler laptop, so she had been occupied as long as she had been awake and the few hours she had slept had been spent snuggled up to Oliver’s chest.

After those endless hours they had finally arrived at an airport somewhere in Asia. Oliver had still refused to tell her the final destination. She had tried to whine like a little child, tell him that the stress wasn’t good for the baby and had even persuaded Emmy to annoy Oliver to tell her, but he had kept his mouth shut.

He had kept his mouth shut until the moment a nice guy with a Queen-sign had told them that there were problems with the seaplane which was why they had to switch to a luxury yacht instead. Felicity would never forget how Oliver’s facial expression had changed from purest joy to sheer horror. Oliver hated boats. Still.

But since there had been no other way to get to the private island in the Maldives Oliver had rented for them, they had gotten on the yacht. Emmeline had immediately run to explore the boat under one of the crew member’s watch while Oliver had gone inward into one of the cabins. Felicity had shortly talked to the captain who had told her that it wasn’t even going to take an hour for them to arrive at the island. Then she had followed Oliver inside.

She approached him slowly, coming to stand in front of him. Oliver showed no sign that he had heard her come in, but Felicity was sure that he had. He still had ninja senses. Carefully she placed her hands around his wrists and pushed his arms away. It took him a second to give in, but eventually he let her move his arms and looked up at her with a broken expression she hadn’t seen for a long, long time in his face.

She climbed on his lap wordlessly, never breaking the eye contact. Immediately his heart rate slowed down and his breaths became deeper and more even. His body was still trembling slightly, but it wasn’t as bad as it had been before. She had always had a calming influence on him, even before they had been together. When his arms wrapped around her body now and pulled her closer against him, Felicity gently rocked her hips against his.

Sex seemed like the perfect distraction in a situation like this. What better use could the bed have?

Still rocking her hips against his which wasn’t exactly easy with the baby belly between them, she lowered her lips to his and kissed him. Their lips moved against each other’s gently and unhurriedly. Felicity’s hands moved from his shoulders down his back and to the hem of his shirt to take it off. As soon as their lips parted, Felicity started pushing his shirt up and-

“Mommy!”

Hastily Felicity slid off of Oliver and sat down on the mattress between them just in time before the door opened and Emmeline came running in, carrying her pink giraffe under her arm. She climbed on Felicity’s lap like Felicity had climbed on Oliver’s before. Her hands came to rest on the baby belly.

“What are you doing?” she asked, looking from her mommy to her daddy and back again.

“Mommy and daddy are tired, so we thought we use the time before we get to our vacations to sleep a little,” Felicity answered.

“And my baby?”

“The baby is sleeping, too,” Oliver replied.

“Then I want to sleep, too,” Emmeline explained and lay down on the mattress, already tucking at Felicity’s hand to make her lie down with her.

So Felicity snuggled up to Emmeline who hugged the baby belly tightly like she always did, and Oliver cuddled Felicity from behind, whispering into her ear, “Worst decision ever to bring a toddler to the honeymoon.”

 

_Day 1_

Felicity still wasn’t over the fact that Oliver Queen, a man who had spent years on a hellish, deserted island, had picked a private island where it was only the three of them and two people from the house staff to spend their second honeymoon. She still couldn’t believe it.

So Felicity had thought all night about how to make it up to him. Since Emmeline had refused to spend the night in her own bed and had instead lay down between both her parents, sex hadn’t been possible. But Felicity weren’t Felicity if she hadn’t come up with a backup plan.

As soon as Oliver had snuck out for a morning run, she had left the bed, too, and was now making him a delicious breakfast. Since she knew how much he loved omelets, she was cooking one of them for him right now and was only waiting for Oliver to come back, so she could properly thank him for the great honeymoon. Even if it was only the first day, she already knew that everything was going to be perfect. This whole week was going to be.

“Hey, babe!”

At the sound of his voice and the sight of his slightly sweaty body Felicity smiled and jumped from the kitchen counter to take the pan with the omelet and a fork and approach him.

“Hi, honey,” she said, getting up onto her tiptoes to press a quick kiss to his lips and then impaled a piece of the omelet onto the fork to feed it to him. Oliver opened his mouth immediately, chewed and gulped. “Great, isn’t it?”

“Didn’t you promise never to try and bake again?”

“An omelet isn’t baked.”

“We should consider it baked good, my dear,” he said with a smile, leaning down slightly. “Felicity Queen, you have failed this omelet.”

“No I didn’t,” she objected, putting some of the food into her own mouth and started chewing. “See? It’s delicious. It’s good, great, perfect even. I could eat it every day for the rest of my life because it is so good and… I am going to spit it out.”

Oliver chuckled while Felicity spit the – horrible! horrible! horrible! – omelet in the kitchen sink. While she was still scooping water into her mouth to get rid of the gross taste, she felt Oliver stepping behind her, putting his hands to her hips and slowly rubbing his semi-erect cock against her butt.

“Maybe we should use the time till Emmy wakes up to continue where we have been interrupted yesterday?”

“Great idea,” Felicity moaned when Oliver’s hand slid between her legs and his lips moved-

“What are you doing?”

Hastily Oliver’s hands moved back to her hips and he took a step back. Felicity looked over her shoulder to see Emmy at the foot of the stairs, watching them.

“Mommy burnt her wrist and we are cooling it with water,” Oliver answered, grabbed Felicity’s hand and held it under the stream of water.

“My baby hurt, too?” Emmeline asked worriedly and crossed the distance, so she could put her ear to the belly. “You hurt, too, baby?”

“No, the baby’s okay,” Felicity answered, leaning her head against Oliver’s shoulder and whispering, “You’re right. Worst decision ever to take her with us.”

 

_Day 2_

They spent the day at the pool, Emmy and Oliver in the pool, Felicity on a Bali bed right next to it. The sun was shining down on them, making Felicity’s skin prickling in the best ways. She had her eyes closed, and was almost drifting into sleep. Her hand moved over her naked belly, following the kicks of her baby.

“Oliver, you are stealing my sun,” she murmured when she felt him hovering above her. Some of the cold water drops fell from his body and onto hers, making her smile.

“I don’t think you owe the sun, Felicity.”

She blinked through one eye to look at him when she answered, but the words got lost when she got distracted by the sight. Oliver wasn’t only hovering over her, but was actually doing a push-up with only one arm to tuck a strand of her hair out of her face while lowering his body enough, so he could kiss her without pressing down on the baby belly.

“Anything you want to say, Felicity?”

“Nope,” she said, shaking her head without taking her eyes off his lips that were so close to hers now.

He lowered himself a little more onto her by bending his arm. His face moved closer to hers and he-

“No, I want to cuddle with my baby!” Emmy declared, climbing onto the bed and pushing Oliver away until he lay beside Felicity on the mattress and Emmeline could cuddle with the swell of her mother’s stomach.

Oliver snuggled his face into the crook of Felicity’s neck, kissing the little dimple at the side of her neck and muttering “Worst decision ever” against her skin.

 

_Day 3_

“Emmy sleeping?” Felicity asked, putting her tablet aside and looking at Oliver who took off his shirt and pants to throw them onto the floor and sneak into bed, hovering over Felicity with his weight propped up onto his hands to both sides of her face.

“She is sleeping which means that we can finally,” he started, interrupting only to press a kiss to her jaw, “do what a honeymoon is for in the first place.”

“That sounds great,” Felicity whispered back.

Their lips met in a slow kiss, their tongues doing their usual dance. Oliver lowered his body a little more, so his abs stroked over the swell of Felicity’s belly, making her moan lowly. Pregnant sex could be awkward because he body refused to move the way she wanted it, but pregnant foreplay was the best. Her head lifted from the pillow to urge closer to hers and her hands slid down his naked back, scratching over the scars, making him groan.

His hips moved against her slowly, heightening the lust and Felicity’s hands slid under the hem of his boxers, cupping his-

“Daddy, you are crushing my baby!”

Felicity’s hands moved out of Oliver’s boxers quickly and Oliver lay down next to her, looking at Emmeline with a slightly annoyed expression in his eyes. As much as he loved his daughter, having her interrupt every honeymoon-action wasn’t exactly making it easy to enjoy her presence.

“I am not crushing the baby. Mommy was cold and I was blanketing her with my body,” Oliver explained. “Come on, I will take you back to bed.”

“No!” Emmy exclaimed and came running to the bed where she lay down between her parents. “I blanket my baby.”

This time Oliver only mouthed the words “Worst decision ever” in the dark. Felicity heard them nonetheless.

 

_Day 4_

“Hey, Emmy, you keep watching the movie, and mommy and I will take a quick shower, okay?”

“Okay.”

Oliver perked his lips. “Emmy, will you mind if mommy and daddy take a long bath instead of a quick shower?”

“No,” she said, and Oliver was almost about to borrow his wife’s habit of doing a fist pump when Emmeline jumped from the backrest of the couch and shouted. “I take a bath with you!”

She was already running upstairs when Oliver looked at Felicity, asking, “Is she doing that on purpose now?”

Felicity sighed, shrugging her shoulders. “Worst decision ever.”

 

_Day 5_

“Okay, we will do this quickly,” Oliver declared, dropping his shirt and pants to the floor, and almost ran to the bed. He didn’t even bother to kiss Felicity’s lips first like he usually did. Instead he just lifted the end of her blanket and snuck under it, spreading her legs and lying down between them.

“Oh yes, quickly… quickly is good,” Felicity moaned lowly when Oliver’s lips started their path up her inner thigh. She moved her legs closer to his torso so her feet could massage his butt while his lips now made contact with her panties. “Oh, yes.”

Oliver chuckled against her clothed clit, making her moan once again. She put her hands to the back of his head under the blanket, pushing his lips closer to her to increase the pleasure that-

“What are you doing?”

Gasping, Felicity hit down on Oliver’s head to make him stop. When she looked up she saw her daughter. Emmeline stood in the door Oliver had apparently forgotten to close properly when he had come in here after putting Emmeline to bed.

“Mommy and daddy play hide and seek,” Felicity explained with raspy voice. “I just found daddy.”

“Daddy needs to hide better,” Emmeline giggled. “I show you.”

With that she turned around and ran out of the room, probably hiding somewhere in the mansion.

“Hide and seek,” Oliver grumbled. “Great idea, Felicity.”

“What was the alternative?” Felicity asked.

“Telling her you were hurt and I am kissing it better.”

“You do realize that she would want to kiss it better, too, then, right?”

“Okay, hide and seek was the better choice,” Oliver agreed with a sigh, writing the words “Worst decision ever” with his tongue against the inside of her thigh before he crawled up her body to kiss her lips once. “I’ll go find her and put her back to bed.”

“You know that she will insist on sleeping here, right?”

Oliver sighed. “I know.”

 

_Day 6_

“Has she realized that we have left yet?” Felicity asked while lifting the hem of her dress hastily.

“No, she’s still watching TV and-“

“Mommy!”

Sighing, Felicity let the hem of her dress slide back down and kissed the underside of Oliver’s jaw, whispering, “We need to be more creative. Tomorrow is our last day here and we didn’t have sex during our honeymoon once. You know, it was nice having Emmy at the wedding, but taking her with us to the honeymoon was the worst decision ever.

 

_Day 7_

They had set their alarms for the middle of the night, long after Emmy had fallen asleep and long before the toddler was usually waking up. They were both tired like hell, but still Oliver just pulled Felicity closer to his chest and started kissing her neck until his wife let out a content sound.

“Good idea to do this in the middle of the night,” Felicity said with a sigh, and bent her head to give Oliver more access to her skin.

“No interruptions,” Oliver whispered, kissing his way up to her jaw and over her cheek until he finally reached her lips. “Hi.”

His lips met hers in a gentle kiss. Their lips moved unhurried above each other’s since they knew that they wouldn’t be interrupted anytime soon. They could take their time to slowly discover each other’s body like they had done uncountable times before that already. Oliver got up on his knees to hover over her. He tugged up the hem of her top and stroked his rough hands over the swell of her stomach gently. His lips formed to a smile against hers as he felt the baby kick.

“I think our baby just woke up.”

“As long as it is just this baby, I am fine,” Oliver answered before continuing to lick into her mouth and stroke the baby belly. “Finally just the two of us.”

“And the baby,” Felicity added, making Oliver smile.

“Just the two of us and the-“

“Daddy!” – it was a painful screech, a cry really. This wasn’t Emmy’s normal I’m-not-tired-and-want-to-be-entertained-voice. This was a whine Felicity had only once heard from her daughter when she had been sick and in pain and had wanted someone to hold her tightly and make her feel better.

Immediately Oliver rolled off of Felicity and ran out of the room. Felicity wanted to follow him quickly, but had to admit that moving wasn’t as easy as it had been a few weeks ago. The second half of the pregnancy had just begun and still she felt like it was about time for the baby to get out. She rolled onto her side awkwardly, propped up onto her hands until she sat in bed and could slide off the mattress and – finally! – follow her husband to Emmy’s room.

Oliver sat on the edge of the mattress, rocking their daughter back and forth in his arms and rubbing her back soothingly. She was crying heartbreakingly, her body shaking like Oliver’s had a week ago when they had come here. Her little hands had formed to tight fists in his shirt and she was holding onto him for dear life.

“What happened?” Felicity asked, sitting down next to Oliver and putting one hand to the back of Emmy’s head, but the little girl only pushed her face more to Oliver’s chest, releasing a sob.

“Nightmare,” Oliver explained. “I think Emmy should better sleep in out bed tonight.”

Felicity looked for any sign of annoyance in his face, but the only expression she found was worry. Oliver knew too well what it felt like to have nightmares and how much you wanted to be held by the people you loved. And because he knew that, he couldn’t just put Emmy back to bed, no matter how much he wanted to spend some quality honeymoon time with his wife.

So they strolled back to their bedroom and all three lay down together with Emmy lying between them. She still refused to loosen her grip on Oliver’s shirt and snuggled up to him as close as possible. Her head rested right under Oliver’s chin.

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too, sweetie.”

“Mommy?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too, sweetie.”

They lay in the dark for some while. Emmeline fell soon asleep, but Oliver kept his soothing movements on their daughter’s body. Felicity could feel his hand moving up and down Emmy’s back because the back of his fingers brushed against her baby belly every time.

“Felicity?” he asked.

“Yes?”

“Maybe it wasn’t the worst decision to bring her here.”

Felicity smiled. “Yeah… I just thought the same.”


	67. Like father, like daughter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We will shortly go back to when Emmy was younger, but he second part of the fic continues where we have left. The picture was just too perfect to not use right now. ;)

It had been an exhausting day at QC. There had been one meeting after the other and all of them together had left Oliver with a terrible headache and a tiredness that a full week in the Arrow cave wasn’t able to make him feel.

All he wanted to do now was taking Felicity into bed and snuggle up to her warm body. He wanted to put his head to her chest and listen to her even heartbeat. He wanted her arm to be wrapped around him tightly and her lips pressed to the top of his head, mumbling soft words to him that were only interrupted when she kissed his hair every now and then.

Felicity wasn’t downstairs like she was most of the times he came home from work. She had probably had an exhausting day herself and had headed into bed early. So he put his briefcase to the side of the stairs, took off his suit jacket and tie and headed upstairs to the bedroom, dropping the rest of his clothes on the way carelessly.

The door to their bedroom was opened slightly. He could hear Felicity’s soft voice, but couldn’t hear what she was saying. He stepped closer to the door and opened it a little more, so he could see the bed. Every cell of his body filled with love at the sight.

Felicity lay in bed, their almost one-year-old daughter Emmeline snuggled up to her side. The little girl had her eyes closed and seemed to be deeply asleep. Her head rested on Felicity’s chest. Felicity’s arm was wrapped around their daughter tightly while she whispered gentle words to the baby, every now and then dropping a kiss to the crown of the little girl’s head. They lay exactly how Oliver had imagined himself and Felicity lying there.

Quietly he stepped into the room. Felicity turned her head, not stopping to whisper soft words, and smiled at him lovingly. Oliver went around the bed and crawled into bed with his two loved ones, sliding as close as possible until Emmeline’s warm back rested against his chest.

“Hi,” he whispered, kissing first the back of Emmeline’s head and then Felicity’s forehead. “I guess she didn’t want to sleep?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, putting her chin to the top of Emmy’s head to press a kiss to Oliver’s lips. “She has explored the entire house, climbing every piece of furniture she could reach. She was that exhausted that she cried for a full hour instead of falling asleep. And since we know what a daddy’s girl she is, I thought I should just take her into bed and do the same thing with her that helps daddy when he had an exhausting day.”

“Very smart of you,” Oliver whispered, kissing her lips, a little longer than he had done the last time.

“How was your day?” Felicity asked. “You look tired.”

Oliver smiled, moving a little closer, so he could put his chin to Emmy’s head, too. Felicity’s lips were only half an inch away from his. Her breath ghosted over his face with every outtake.

“I actually came upstairs to cuddle with you and listen to your heartbeat and let your soft voice lull me into sleep, but found that my place was already taken.”

“Sorry,” Felicity whispered, but smiled.

Oliver tugged a strand of her golden hair that had fallen to her face behind her ear and leaned in to kiss her once more, longer this time. His lips opened for her tongue to explore his mouth like it had done several times before already. They only pulled apart when Emmy made a low sound and moved slightly. One of her tiny hands gripped the fabric of Felicity’s top and formed to a fist around it like she was keeping her mother from moving away from him.

“As long as I only have to share you with her, I am fine,” Oliver explained, kissing the tip of her nose. “I might be able to share you with all of our future kids, but that is my limit. No sharing you with anyone else.”

“I think that can be arranged,” Felicity replied with a smile and kissed him.

Oliver was just about to deepen the kiss by stroking his tongue into her mouth when Emmeline wiggled with her little butt, changing her position and pushing him only a little away from Felicity, but it was enough to part his lips from Felicity’s and make it impossible for him to reach hers again.

Felicity giggled quietly. “Well, you might be able to share me with our kids, but I don’t think our baby wants to share me.”

“Like father, like daughter,” Oliver just mumbled and snuggled his face to Emmeline’s back before closing his eyes and falling asleep with her heartbeat in his ears.

 

 

“Emmy, come on,” Oliver said over his shoulder while fumbling with his keys to find the one for the front door without letting the bag with bread rolls and croissants for their breakfast fall to the ground. “I am sure that mommy is waiting for us already.”

But Emmeline made no move to follow him to the door. Instead she kept picking flowers from the meadow in their front yard. She loved picking flowers. Whenever she got the chance to pick some, she did so, and then gave the bunch to Felicity. A few days ago he had counted twenty small bunches in their home since Emmy insisted on keeping all of the flowers. Whenever some flowers didn’t look that nice anymore because they were sleeping – at least that was Emmy’s interpretation – the two-year-old went outside and picked new once to replace the old ones.

“Emmy,” Oliver repeated, but his daughter acted like he didn’t even hear him. Half an hour ago Felicity had woken him with kisses down his neck, and he had already imagined a thousand things to do with her when she had stopped and far less gently urged him to wake up and go get her food because she was starving. He had barely put one foot into the corridor when Emmeline had come from her room and told him that she wanted to accompany him wherever he was going. So he had helped her to put on some clothes and taken her with him which had cost him time that Felicity had spent hungry. And hungry Felicity was not something that way easy to bear.

“Emmy, come on, the baby is hungry,” Oliver said and immediately Emmeline let the flowers fall to the floor and came running to him. Of course she did. The baby was his daughter’s greatest weakness. Whenever she was doing something she wasn’t supposed to, he said something about the baby, and Emmeline stopped. She loved that baby more than anything else. A few days back she had collected all her pacifiers and given them to him, saying that she didn’t need them anymore since the baby probably needed them more.

“Emmy, where are you going?” Oliver asked when Emmeline ran up the stairs instead of going into the kitchen, but the two-year-old didn’t answer. He just shrugged his shoulders, put his keys in the little bowl next to the door and stepped into the kitchen. Felicity wasn’t there which was unusual for her hungry version. When Felicity was hungry, she waited for him in the kitchen and ripped the food out of his hands as soon as he had stepped into the room. Not today.

He was just about to call out for her when he heard her voice coming from the living room. One gaze into the direction made him see her long, almost completely naked legs. Only the topmost parts of her thighs were covered with a pair of her sleeping shorts. She still wore one of his grey shirts that covered the beautiful baby belly.

Just like Palmer’s hands. They were resting to both sides of the swell of Felicity’s stomach with her hands over his.

It made him feel jealous immediately. As stupid as it was since Felicity was in the 22nd week of pregnancy with their second child, Oliver still felt jealous. Ray Palmer had always been a thorn in his flesh, even after Palmer and Felicity had broken up and she had started a relationship with him instead. Even now that he and Felicity were married, having children and Palmer and he got along during their team-ups for the mission and the days they all spend together in the circle of their friends, Oliver still wasn’t too please to see him with Felicity, especially not if he was touching her the way he did right now.

“Ray,” Oliver said.

Luckily his voice didn’t sound as tense as his body felt, but the look Felicity gave him let him know that Felicity knew exactly what he was thinking. He saw the slight warning in her eyes, but that couldn’t stop him from what Felicity had once called his usual alpha-male-behavior. After he had shaken Palmer’s hand that had, as soon as Oliver’s fingers had let go of them, returned to Felicity’s belly, Oliver bent down and whispered a low “Hi, babe” and then kissed her, longer than the usual kiss he gave her when someone was around, much longer. When Felicity pulled back slightly and opened her mouth to say something, his lips just followed and he used the chance to stroke his tongue over hers once. It made her moan quietly and yet she leaned her head back to make him stop, but that only allowed him to press short kisses down her neck instead.

Contentedly Oliver noticed that Palmer’s hands had fallen away from Felicity’s belly which only gave him the chance to bend down lower and kiss her stomach through the shirt. “Morning, baby,” he whispered and then straightened back up.

“Oh, Ray, Ray!” Felicity almost yelled and hastily grabbed her ex-boyfriend’s hands to put them back onto her stomach. “Can you feel it now?”

Oliver watched the same expression that he had seen uncountable times on other people’s faces before on Ray’s face now. Everyone who got to feel a baby kick like that for the first time had the same joyful expression on their face. Although this was their second baby already, Oliver still felt like it should be a privilege only to the small circle of the closest family – Felicity, Emmeline and he himself – to feel the baby kick. But Felicity had only waved that off with a snort.

“Wow, someone is moving pretty quickly,” Ray said with a chuckle, his hands moving over Felicity’s stomach, following the movements of the baby.

“Do you want breakfast, darling?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shot him a look. He barely ever called her “darling” or anything like that. She knew exactly that it was one of the things he only did when he wanted to make sure people, especially men, around them didn’t forget that they were happily married.

“Later,” she just answered and turned back to Ray. “I guess the baby just woke up.”

Oliver put his hands to the pocket of his pants and thought about what to do now. He wasn’t exactly good at sharing Felicity. He had wanted to spend the morning just with her and Emmeline. And now he had to watch her ex-boyfriend touching her like that. It just didn’t sit well with him.

“What are you doing here, Ray?” Oliver asked, noticing that his voice sounded more sharply than he had intended. It earned him another glare of his wife. Palmer just kept his eyes on the baby belly, his hands still following the movements.

“Ray came here because he-“

“Hi, mommy!”

All heads turned when Emmeline came running in, her pink giraffe in her arms. Without hesitation she ran over to the couch. Her eyes stayed on Palmer’s hands that where still on her mother’s belly for a short moment before she frowned, pushed his hands away with a strict “Palmer, no!” and climbed onto her mother’s lap to hug the belly as tightly as possible.

Oliver was still smiling proudly at his daughter when he noticed Felicity’s angry glare. It had to be quite obvious that Emmeline had picked up the habit of calling Felicity’s ex-boyfriend Palmer from him. Nobody else called him Palmer. Oliver just perked his lips and looked at Felicity amusedly.

“Ray came over to invite me to a weekend trip to New York.”

That made the smile on Oliver’s face disappear quickly. His hands formed to fists in the pocket of his pants and his jaws were pressed together tightly. He was sure that there was more about those words that Felicity just didn’t say yet to tease him after he had made Emmeline behave rudely to her friend, but still those words resounded in his head over and over again.

“Excuse me?” he asked between gritted teeth.

Palmer looked at Felicity, who didn’t seem like she wanted to say anything more. He then cleared his throat and said, “There is a technology fair in New York, and I thought Felicity would like to join me there. And Cisco.”

Oliver perked his eyebrow, and looked back at Felicity. He could see the struggle in her face. She wanted to punish him with silence for Emmeline’s rude behavior, but she also wanted to go to that fair and knew that she needed to talk to him to convince her. She sighed and then said, “Please? I haven’t been on anything like that for years, and I think it might also be important for the company if someone shows up.”

“Fine, so I’ll come with you.”

Felicity held back a snort and just put her head to the side. “Oliver, you don’t understand much of technology.”

“Maybe, but-“

Sighing, she pushed Emmeline away from her a little, so she could get up. Emmy looked at her mother angrily, but Felicity ignored that and went over to Oliver instead, took his hands and put them around her waist.

“Oliver, please,” she said softly. “You know how much I love you and how much I enjoy spending time with you, but it would be nice to just spend some time with other tech nerds again. Just for that one weekend.”

Oliver tightened his arms around her, replying, “It’s not like you need my permission to do anything you want.”

“Well, since I will take the baby with me, I think it would be nice to know that you won’t get me charged for kidnapping.”

“I think the baby would have to be born for that,” Oliver answered, but his words got lost under Emmeline’s angry shout, “No! My baby is staying here!”

She slid from the couch and pushed herself between her parents to look at her mother angrily with her arms crossed in front of her little chest and perked lips that looked ridiculously similar to Oliver’s.

“I’ll take good care of both of them,” Palmer said from the couch.

“Not helping,” Felicity said hastily, putting her hand to Oliver’s chin to keep his head from turning to their friend and look at him angrily. She leaned over and kissed Oliver softly. “Please.”

Oliver looked at her for a few more moments before he sighed, lifted Emmeline from the floor and whispered into her ear, “Let mommy go, and we will have a full weekend where it is just us. We’ll do all the things mommy doesn’t allow you to do. We spend all day watching TV, eat a lot of ice cream and pizza and everything else you want.”

Emmeline thought about it for a short second, and then she giggled and nodded. “Okay.”

Felicity shook her head with a breathy laugh, and thought once more that those two were so similar. All you had to do was knowing what buttons to push, and they were putty in your hands. Like father, like daughter.

 


	68. Bad Karma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are we even alive after yesterday?
> 
> Anyway, like always, if you have any prompts/ideas let me know here or on tumblr (same username). :)

She missed Oliver. She really, really missed him. And she missed Emmy. She even missed her home although it had made her feel like having cabin fever lately. Her husband, her daughter and her home were what made her feel comfortable. Now she had been without all three of them for almost five full days which wasn’t only much longer than usually – had she ever spent five days without her daughter? – but also much longer than it had been planned.

When Ray had asked her whether she wanted to join Cisco and him at a technology fair in New York, Felicity had loved the idea of spending a weekend away and doing some nerdy IT girl things. She had been supposed to fly to New York on Saturday morning and return on Sunday evening. But then Cisco had suggested going there earlier, so they had left on Thursday morning instead. And then they had met one of QC’s most important business partners and he had asked for a lunch on Monday. Felicity couldn’t have rejected. Even if she wasn’t working at QC anymore, she was still a representative of the company.

So she hadn’t seen Oliver, Emmeline or her home since Thursday morning. She couldn’t wait to finally be back home with her loved ones.

Felicity leaned her head against the backrest of the seat in Ray’s private jet with a sigh and stroked her baby bump. At least one part of her family was always with her. Her legs were outstretched, and her feet lay in Ray’s lap while his wonderful hands massaged her hurting soles. All the standing and walking had been more exhausted than Felicity had assumed.

Despite her growing homesickness and her hurting feet, the weekend had been great. She hadn’t known how much she had missed spending time with technology and other nerds until now. She had been that deep in her mommy-baby-bubble with Emmeline and her unborn little one that she had almost forgotten what her life had been like before her little whirlwind of a daughter had been born and had turned her whole life upside down.

The thought sent another wave of homesickness through her veins. She quickly lifted her purse from the floor and pulled out her phone to reread some of the messages Oliver had sent her over the last five days. There had been several messages on Thursday and Friday already, but those had more been about if she was okay and that they were okay and everything was okay.

But as soon as there had been the first reports – reports that Oliver had only accidently read in online journals, seen on TV and heard on the radio however it was possible to do things like that accidentally - about the fair and there had been pictures of Ray and Felicity the messages had become more teasing.

__  


She loved when Oliver was jealous. It was sweet that even after three years of marriage, four years in a relationship and one and a half children hadn’t changed anything about that. He was still as jealous as he had been on day one. Or day minus whatever since Oliver had been pretty jealous even before they had been together. And Emmy’s tummyache had only been going to keep him up all night, so…

Smiling, she scrolled down a little further to the conversation they had had that night.

__  


She had called Oliver immediately and they had talked until she had fallen asleep. She had actually woken up with the phone still pressed to her ear, hearing Oliver’s even breath since he had been asleep. That had been one of the only times he had ever woken up after her. Normally he woke up the second she moved.

And then there had been that nice little talk they had had two days ago.

__  


Apparently Oliver had seen a report that had stated that Felicity and Ray were officially back together, she had left her husband and her daughter to be with Ray and their baby that was growing in her womb already. It had taken her a long, long phone call until she had been able to convince Oliver to stay home. But she had managed to do it. She just had no idea how.

 

As soon as they had landed, Felicity had taken out her phone and was now calling Oliver. He had promised to come pick her up from the airport, being just as impatient about her return as she herself.

“Hey, babe,” he said when he took the call, a low sigh audible in his voice.

“What’s wrong?” She asked immediately.

“Emmy is sick,” Oliver replied at the same moment that their daughter’s heartbreaking cry was heard somewhere near him. “It started with a slight fever yesterday morning, and I thought it would be a cold or something, but John called and said that Sara has chickenpox. Now Emmy has a rash all over her body.”

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have come home.”

“If I hadn’t found out what it was myself, I would have called you. I was actually just about to send you a photo of the rash when John called.”

“It’s not like I could have told you that it was chickenpox anyway. I never had that.”

There was a weird silence at the other end of the conversation, except for the crying of their daughter of course.

“Oliver, what’s going on? Why aren’t you saying anything?” she asked.

“Felicity, if you never had chickenpox, you can still be infected.”

“Oliver, chickenpox is a childhood disease. Adults can’t be infected with it.”

“They can.”

“No, they can’t.”

“You do a research in the web, I tell Speedy to pick you up at the airport and pack you a bag with some more stuff you need for the time.”

“What time?”

“The time you will have to spend at Thea’s place, so you don’t get infected.”

“Oliver, I told you that it is a childhood disease and-“

“You do the research, I call Speedy.”

With that he hung up, and left Felicity to stare at her phone.

 

It turned out that adults could get infected with chickenpox. Most people got infected in their childhood, and once you had had the disease, you were immune. Felicity never had had chickenpox which was why the disease was a danger to her and the baby. So Oliver had kicked Felicity out of the house to live with Thea for as long as Emmy was sick. Felicity whined at the phone that she wanted to come home to her husband and her sick baby. Oliver tried to lighten the mood by telling her that it was her bad karma for traveling with Ray coming back to her, but it hadn’t made her feel any better.

The first evening Felicity was so tired and exhausted that she just fell into bed and was asleep before her head hit the pillow. It felt more like passing out than like sleep, but that was probably better since it spared her from the restlessness that sleeping anywhere in Starling City but her home would have brought along.

The first three days were spent with Thea. Shopping, watching movies, going out for brunches, lunches and dinner were only few of the things Thea suggested spending their time with. They even went to the cinema where Thea made Felicity eat a lot of popcorn which ended in Felicity feeling as nauseated as she had felt at the beginning of the pregnancy.  
“Baby, why did you eat popcorn? You know that you always get sick from it,” Oliver had stated when she had called him that evening, whining about feeling sick.  
“Yes, but normally I have you sitting right next to me and reminding me that I get sick of it.”

On the fourth day Oliver called and suggested that at least they should see each other for a few hours. So Thea went to take care of Emmy and Oliver met with Felicity at the penthouse after a short stop at the foundry to shower and change into new clothes to make sure the virus wasn’t going to infect Felicity. Roy was sent away to do something wherever he wanted as long as he left the penthouse.  
As soon as the door opened and Oliver stepped in, she threw herself at him and pressed her lips to his in a passionate, hungry kiss. Felicity started taking his jacket off and unbuttoning his dress shirt even before the door was closed.  
It had been more than a week now that she had last seen Oliver in person, last smelled him, tasted him, felt him. They both ignored the ringing of their phones. They kept kissing and touching and moaning lowly into each other’s mouth even when Thea’s voice told whoever was calling the phone in the penthouse that neither she nor Roy were available and the caller should just leave a message.  
It wasn’t until after the peep that both of them stopped moving, their lips still pressed together, though. “Ollie, hi, it’s me, Speedy. I… ahem… it’s kind of embarrassing, considering how often I have taken care of Emmy now, but… she is crying. Like really, really crying since you left. She doesn’t stop and I get a little worried because her head is all red and I don’t think that she is breathing normally and-“  
Oliver hurried to the phone and picked up, his dress shirt unbuttoned, just like his jeans. “Have you tried to mimic Dory’s ‘Just keep swimming’? She’s totally into it and… Oh, okay… No, no, it’s… It’s okay. I am on my way.”  
“No,” Felicity whined when Oliver turned around to her with a disappointed expression in the face and started buttoning his shirt again.  
“Sorry, but Emmy sounded really upset and…” Oliver started, but stopped to approach her. He framed her face with his hands, his thumbs stroking the soft skin over her cheekbones. He kissed her gently, once, twice and one last time. “Tomorrow. When Emmy is asleep, I come here and we have some fun. Okay?”  
Felicity nodded with a sigh. “Give our baby a kiss from me.”  
“Give me a kiss, I’ll take it to our daughter.”  
Smiling, Felicity got up onto her tiptoes and kissed him, slowly and unhurried. Her tongue opened his lips and slowly moved above his before their lips broke apart again.  
“I don’t think I should kiss our daughter with tongue,” Oliver smirked, but Felicity only rolled her eyes, so he bent down and pressed a kiss against her baby bump. “Take good care of mommy.”

Five days after that they still hadn’t met again. Emmy had destroyed all their plans.  
After Oliver had put her to bed the evening after his short meeting with Felicity, Thea had come to take care of Emmy, but Oliver had only put one foot outside of the house when Emmeline had started crying. He had tried to ignore it and go nonetheless, but he hadn’t even made it to the car. He couldn’t have left his sick, crying baby.  
Ever since that day Emmy refused to sleep anywhere else but on Oliver’s chest. As soon as he moved, she would wake up, grab his shirt and look at him with tears in her eyes, pleading with him to not leave.  
So he hadn’t tried leaving her again, knowing that his baby girl needed him.  
Felicity had meanwhile taken Oliver’s place at QC. Since he couldn’t leave Emmeline, the only possible consequence for her had been to take his job. It kept her busy during the day and exhausted her enough, so she didn’t have the energy to turn from one side to the other all night, seeking the warmth of Oliver’s body that wasn’t there.  
She was surprised how much she actually enjoyed being back in the company. It took her some time to work her way back into the whole stuff, but she did. And it was fun. A lot more than she had thought.  
But most of that probably came from the fact that the work kept distracting her of how much she actually missed Oliver and Emmeline.

They were fifteen days apart now, including the days Felicity had spent in New York. And a new wave of homesickness ripped through her body like actual physical pain. She lay in bed in the middle of the night, but couldn’t sleep. Falling asleep without Oliver was never easy, but falling asleep without him in a bed that wasn’t theirs especially while being pregnant felt more and more impossible.  
She bit her lip, quietly discussing with herself whether or not she should call Oliver. They had spoken on the phone earlier that day. According to the doctor there weren’t any new blisters which meant that it was getting better. He had still suggested that Felicity should spend some more days away from them. When there wasn’t any new blisters in the next five to six days, Felicity was allowed to come home.  
Five more days. She had taken fifteen so far. She would survive five more.  
Still she took her phone and called Oliver per video call. She just needed to talk to him and see him. He would probably hate her for waking up Emmy in the middle of the night in case she woke up from that, but she couldn’t be blamed for her actions. She was pregnant. Pregnant women couldn’t be blamed for anything. It was all the hormones.  
To her surprise Oliver picked up immediately and what surprised her even more was that the room was lightened and there were familiar sounds coming from somewhere in the room.  
“Are you watching Nemo?” Felicity asked. “In the middle of the night?”  
“Emmy, tell mommy why we are watching Nemo in the middle of the night,” Oliver said, holding the phone a little further away, so Felicity could see that the both of them were lying in the bed she usually shared with Oliver, Emmy’s back pressed to Oliver’s chest and her hands playing with the hair of Oliver’s forearm.  
“We can’t sleep,” Emmy said without looking up. “We miss mommy and my baby.”  
Felicity smiled. “We miss you, too.”  
“Can’t sleep?” Oliver asked.  
“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh.  
“Emmy, shall we let mommy watch Nemo with us?”  
“Yes!” Emmy replied, wildly nodding her head.  
Oliver put the phone to his shoulders. The angle of the camera almost made Felicity feel like she really was there with the two of them. Whenever they watched TV together, Felicity rested her head on Oliver’s shoulder. Of course he would use that now to make her feel like she was right beside him. He knew exactly what he had to do to make her feel better. And it worked.  
Nemo wasn’t even back in the ocean when Felicity was already asleep.

 

They had been separated for twenty-one days when Thea finally drove Felicity back home. With the bump – she was at the very last day of her 25th week now – it was impossible for her to drive herself. Felicity had actually now idea how she was going to last more than three more months without exploding. She felt like a whale already.

“Are you okay?” Thea asked when she turned left into the street where Felicity’s home was. “You haven’t said anything during the drive. I thought you were excited to come home.”

“Thea, I am that excited that it can only be described as being crazy,” Felicity replied breathlessly. “I am that excited to come home that I feel like I can barely breathe, never mind speak and-“

Her sentence ended in a long, high-pitched screech when she opened the door although the car still hadn’t come to a full stop. She threw herself at Oliver who had been waiting in front of the house with the biggest, goofiest smile on his face. He wrapped his one arm around her tightly. The other hand came to rest on the top of the baby bump, stroking it slowly. Felicity pressed herself closer to Oliver. Her right hand played with the hair at the nape of Oliver’s neck. Her left hand roamed over his back, enjoying the play of muscles there. She could feel Oliver smile against her lips when he felt the baby kicking wildly against his hand.

Both of them could hear Thea clearing her throat over and over again to try and interrupt them, but they deliberately chose to ignore her. Finally being back together felt too good to let go just yet.

It wasn’t until Emmeline came outside with her pink giraffe in her arm and yelled “Mommy” while already running towards her parents, carelessly dropping her stuffed animal on her way, that they broke apart. Felicity bent down and lifted Emmy from the floor. Immediately the little girl started kissing all over her mother’s face.

“God, I missed you, sweetie,” Felicity laughed between two kisses that Emmy pressed to her lips.

“We missed you, too,” Oliver said with a sigh and pressed a kiss to the back of her head.

When Emmy struggled to get back to the floor, Felicity put her down. She turned to Thea while Emmeline started to stroke Felicity’s bump and to talk to it, starting with, “Hi, my baby.”

“Are you going to stay over for dinner?” she asked.

“No, I think I will go home to Roy,” Thea answered. “Now that we finally have the penthouse to ourselves again…”

“Yeah, we kind of have the same plans for when Emmy is asleep.”

“We do?” Oliver asked, the smirk audible in his voice.

Felicity nodded while Oliver’s lips already trailed down her neck. “We do.”

“Okay, could you at least wait for me to be gone before you start undressing each other?” Thea complained, stepping forward to hug Felicity while taking care that Emmy didn’t get crushed between them. “It was nice having you at the loft. Whenever you want to move in permanently because you have enough of my brother, just say so.”

“I don’t think that will ever happen, but I appreciate the offer.”

She hugged Oliver shortly and pressed a kiss to Emmeline’s head, but the toddler was too busy talking and cuddling with the baby to actually care. They waited until the car disappeared at the crossroad before Oliver put an arm around Felicity’s shoulder and said, “Come on, let’s go inside. Cuddling.”

“Uh, that’s a good plan,” Felicity said with a smile and was just about to take a step forward when Emmeline tugged at the hem of her mother’s dress, calling her attention. “What’s up, sweetie?”

Felicity got down, crouching in front of her, so they were face to face. The toddler stepped as close as possible and framed Felicity’s face with her little hands the same way she had seen her father holding her mother’s face endless times before.

“Mommy?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“No leave again.”

Felicity smiled, pulling the toddler forward and pressing a kiss to her daughter’s lips. “No, mommy is never going to leave that long again. Promise.”


	69. Talking names

“Is that coffee?” Felicity asked when Oliver sat down on the other end of the couch, holding a mug of steaming liquid in his hands.

“Yes,” Oliver replied, and hastily held the mug away from her when Felicity reached out to take it from him. “No coffee in the pregnancy. We talked about this. A lot.”

“Just let me smell it,” Felicity whined, putting on a pouting face. “I’m not gonna drink it. I promise.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes at her, but finally gave in and handed her the mug. Felicity put both her hands around it like she was holding a precious treasure. She lifted the mug to her nose, closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, enjoying the scent of the coffee. It was almost ridiculous how much she loved coffee, but she hadn’t tasted her favorite liquid on her tongue for months now, so the smell made the longing at least a little bit better.

Instead of handing the cup back to him, though, Felicity reached over the armrest of the couch and put the mug to the floor, earning her a questioning gaze from Oliver.

“If I don’t get to drink coffee, neither do you,” she explained.

“You said making me give up coffee just because you can’t drink it right now, would be stupid.”

“It is stupid,” Felicity said seriously with a nod of her head, “when you have to get to work or have to go in the field because neither should the CEO of a multibillion company be asleep in his office nor should you fall asleep during a mission since it could get you killed. Anyway, if I don’t get coffee to get through this fight, neither will you.”

“Who says we are going to fight?”

Felicity perked her eyebrows. “Oliver, when we were trying to find a name for Emmy, we almost got divorced.”

“Don’t you think you are exaggerating the seriousness of our fight a little?”

“Only a little,” Felicity answered with a smile, holding her thumb and forefinger up to show that it was indeed just a tiny exaggeration.

Chuckling, Oliver leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his wife’s lips. Her hand came to rest at his cheek, the tips of her fingers scratched over the stubble. After kissing her once more he leaned back a little, whispering against her lips, “Whatever happens today, please remember that I love you.”

Felicity let out a breathy laugh as Oliver leaned back completely again. They both got a little more comfortable, finding the right positions to get through this. Felicity’s legs were outstretched and spread apart slightly. Emmy lay between her mother’s legs, her head resting on the baby belly. She had fallen asleep like this almost an hour ago, so Felicity had decided that the toddler could nap here instead of upstairs in her room. Oliver tugged one leg underneath him and put the other foot on the couch, his toes playing with Felicity’s.

“Okay, let the fight begin” Felicity said and reached under her shirt, pulling a piece of paper from somewhere between her breasts. She answered Oliver’s questioning gaze with a satisfied grin. She had known that this was going to throw him out of balance.

“Why do I feel like you aren’t going to play fair?” Oliver asked, pulling out a piece of paper from the back pocket of his jeans.

“Well, I want to win,” Felicity replied.

Picking a girl name for their baby would be a fight. It had been a fight the last time, so neither of them expected it to be any different this time. It had been a miracle that they had found a name for Emmeline. Well, Felicity had found it on the web. It had been the perfect mixture of Emma and Evelyn, a name Felicity had loved and one that Oliver had picked. She doubted that there was a chance that they would find a name like that again.

Why was picking a boy’s name so much easier? When she had been pregnant with Emmy and they hadn’t known whether the baby would be a boy or a girl, Felicity had just stated that they should call him Thomas. She wouldn’t have necessarily picked the name under other circumstanced, but she had known that the name meant a lot to Oliver. To her surprise Oliver had felt like naming their baby after someone else shouldn’t be something they should do because their baby should be able to live the life he/she wanted and shouldn’t have to feel like he/she needed to live up to someone’s legacy. So they had picked Thomas as a middle name and Benjamin as a first name. Benjamin Thomas Queen. Still felt right.

Since it just wasn’t easy for the two of them to find a name for a girl they had both agreed that each one would pick ten names they liked and then start talking about them. Let the first round begin!

“Who starts?” Felicity asked, putting her free hand to the back of Emmeline’s hand, stroking over her curly hair when the girl made low sounds in her sleep.

“Lady’s first,” Oliver offered with a gesture.

“Okay,” Felicity replied with a nod of her hair, adjusting her glasses on her nose to look at the paper where she had written down her ten favorite names. “First name on my list is – wait! Do you have put them into an order? Like your favorite at first or your favorite as a last because I just wrote them down like they came into my mind and now-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted his wife’s ramble, “relax. I haven’t put them into an order.”

“Oh, okay,” Felicity said, nodding her head. “Can you really believe that we are already picking the name for our second baby? It’s like yesterday that you finally gave into your feelings for me and soon we will have two babies.”

Oliver smiled at her with a dreamy expression in his eyes. He didn’t have to answer for Felicity to know that he felt the same way. After they had gotten together, everything had happened so fast. They had gotten married, soon after Emmy had been on her way and once you had a child you felt like time was running twice as quickly as before.

“Our baby will probably be born without a name if we continue like this,” Oliver said after a while.

Felicity groaned. “I don’t want our little deliriously happy baby bubble to burst.”

“You could leave the choice of a name up to me,” Oliver suggested with a teasing grin.

“Over my dead body are you choosing the name of our baby on your own,” Felicity said with a snort, making Oliver laugh. “Okay, let’s start. First name on my list is Gwendolyn. It means white circle and probably alludes to a moon goddess.”

“Unless our baby is becoming a werewolf I don’t see why her name should allude to a moon goddess,” Oliver replied.

Felicity pressed her lips together. She wanted to be angry for that commentary, but she just couldn’t. Taking the pen from behind her ear, she struck the name from the list and said, “Fine, so no Gwendolyn, and I’ll let you get away with the comment because it actually was a little funny, but if you continue to make fun of every name I picked, I will banish you onto the couch.”

“As if you were able to sleep without me helping you find a comfortable position that doesn’t make you turn around and around for hou-,” Oliver murmured, but stopped when Felicity kicked against his foot lightly. Grinning and winking, he lifted his list. “First name on my list is Annabelle.”

“Annabelle?”

“Annabelle,” Oliver repeated. “No idea of the meaning, but I think Emmeline and Annabelle is a nice combination.”

“Oliver, you do remember this movie that we watched? About the man who gave this awful doll to his pregnant wife and then the doll attacked its owner?”

“Sure.”

“You do remember that the name of the movie was Annabelle?”

“I do.”

Felicity put her head to the side and frowned. “So basically naming our child after a goddess is weird, but naming her after a psychotic doll is okay?”

“Well, we are not naming the baby Annabelle because of the doll. We are naming her Annabelle because it is a nice name.”

“Every time I would look at that baby I would only think about that psychotic doll. The movie was horrible!”

“It wasn’t that horrible,” Oliver answered, a smug smile forming on his lips. “Actually I remember you said that we should watch the movie more often if it ended with my distracting you every time.”

“Wipe that smile off your face and strike that name off your list.”

Emmy moved, rubbing her cheek against the baby belly for a moment. She turned onto her other side, rubbing the other cheek against the belly. She sighed softly before her breath evened out again as she continued sleeping.

“Next name on my list is Matilda.”

“Since we are in twenty-first century, no.”

So Felicity’s second name was crossed off.

“Adelaide,” Oliver suggested.

“Adelaide? I don't know... It has a nice ring to it, but no."

Oliver’s second name was crossed off.

“Sophie.”

“That doesn’t fit to Emmeline.”

Felicity’s third name was crossed off.

“Ophelia. You have to like that name. It’s Shakespeare.”

“She lost her mind and died. How am I supposed to like that name on my baby?”

“Felicity, you shouldn’t take every allusion that literally. Just because we name the baby Ophelia, doesn’t mean she will suffer the same fate as Shakespeare’s Ophelia.”

“You are only saying that because you didn’t know her fate, Mr.-I-didn’t-study-Shakespeare-at-any-of-the-four-colleges-I-dropped-ouf-of.”

“Of course I did know what happened to Ophelia,” Oliver objected, looking at her as if she had just severely insulted him.

“In that case I doubt about your power of judgment and exclude you from making the choice.”

“You can’t exclude me from making this choice.”

“Since picking Ophelia doesn’t really make me trust your judgment, I think I can.”

Oliver sighed. “Fine. I’ll cross it off from the list.”

Felicity watched Oliver doing that. He had the usual frown between his eye brows that always was there when he was worried or angry. The fact that it was there now made Felicity bite down on her bottom lip. They were supposed to have fun picking a baby name and not get mad at each other because they couldn’t find consent.

When Oliver looked up from his paper, he noticed her gaze immediately and perked his eyebrow. “You okay?”

“I don’t know,” she answered. “Are we okay?”

Smiling softly, Oliver lifted Felicity’s foot from the couch and to his lips, kissing each of her toes. Giggling, Felicity let her head fall back and tried to move her foot away from Oliver’s lips, but he kept her ankle in a tight grip, kissing her toes once again, in reversed order. After his lips had returned to the big toe, he moved them down her sole and then put her foot against his stubbled cheek, tickling her even more while saying, “We are not okay. We are perfect. We live in our deliriously happy baby bubble.”

When Oliver let Felicity’s foot back to the couch, Emmy moved again. She put her hands against the bump and sat up. Her eyes were barely opened. Dazedly she looked to her mother and then to her father, trying to find out what had woken her. With a loud sigh she crawled over to Oliver, rested her body against his chest and closed her eyes again. She was almost asleep again when she muttered, “Daddy, hug.”

Obediently Oliver put his strong arms around his daughter’s tiny body that was crawled up against his chest. He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head and then rested his chin on top of her head to smile at his wife.

“Do you want to continue?” he asked.

Felicity nodded, lifting her list. “Theodora.”

“Too old.”

Name number four – adieu!

“Caroline,” Oliver suggested.

“Emmeline – Caroline,” Felicity said out loud, shaking her head.

Oliver crossed the name off the list.

“Charlotte.”

“No.”

“Reason?”

“I don’t need a reason. I just don’t like the name.”

“Oliver.”

“Felicity.”

Felicity perked her lips. “You are just saying no because I chose the name.”

“I am saying no because I don’t want our child to share anything with Sex and the City.”

“You watched Sex and the City?” Felicity said, laughing.

“Not funny,” Oliver growled. “Thea made me watch the whole series when she was sick. It was terrible!”

Felicity pressed her lips together tightly to hold back more laughter. She was so going to ask Thea about this. Why hadn’t her sister-in-law told her about that already? It was the perfect information to tease Oliver for the rest of his life. She happily gave up the name, knowing what she knew now.

“So… your next name?” Felicity asked, doing her best to regain control over her face.

“I can see what you are thinking, Smoak. Don’t even try to ask Thea about it.”

“It’s ‘Queen’, my dear,” Felicity replied, “or in your case ‘your majesty’.”

“Did the pregnancy go to your head now?”

Laughing, Felicity leaned forward, carefully avoiding touching sleeping Emmy. She put her hands to Oliver’s shoulders to keep the weight of the baby in her bump to pull her down and pressed a kiss to her lips.

“I love you,” she whispered, kissing him once more. “Your next pick?”

While she settled back against the pillows on her side of the couch, Oliver lifted his list, reading out, “Ella.”

Felicity scrunched her nose. “That sounds like we haven’t put any effort into finding a name. I like it, but Emmeline and Ella? In the combination Ella sounds like a cheap version of Emmeline. So no.”

Oliver crossed the name off and looked at her. “You do realize that half the names are eliminated now? We are basically no closer to finding a name.”

Sighing, Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “We could still try to pray for a boy.”

“I think that would have been a good way before the conception. If my biology class hasn’t failed me completely, I think there is no way to change the baby’s sex now.”

“It could be worth a try.”

Smiling, Oliver rubbed Emmeline’s back and said, “I think we should rather put our time to good use and try to find a girl’s name. Come on, your next pick.”

“Rachel.”

“No.”

“Reason?”

“I don’t need a reason. I just don’t like the name.”

“That is exactly what you said before!” Felicity complained and then perked her eyebrows. “And then you told me that you have been watching Sex and the city. So what secret is there behind this name? You’ve been watching Friends, too?”

“Never heard of that,” Oliver answered and looked like he meant it.

“Then why don’t you like the name. There has to be reason for it. Otherwise I’ll keep the name on the list.”

Oliver sighed. “When I was in High School there was this teacher, Ms. Rachel Summers. She was like the hottest teacher in school and I-“

“Okay, stop!” Felicity interrupted him, already striking the name off her list. “I don’t even want to know the rest of the story about sexy teacher fantasies. Just continue with your pick.”

“Scarlett.”

“I said no to that name year ago! Besides, how can you like Scarlett but not Charlotte?! Sex and the City or not!” Felicity almost yelled and hastily slapped her hand in front of her lips when Emmeline started moving. She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and turned around, so her back rested against Oliver’s chest now.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“We are trying to find a name for the baby.”

“My baby?” Emmeline asked, immediately crawling out of her father’s embrace and to her mother where she could curl herself around the bump, stroking it softly with her little hands. “Name is Nemo.”

“I don’t think Nemo is a proper name for a baby, Emmy,” Felicity explained softly. “Besides, Daddy and I are trying to find a name for when the baby is a girl.”

“Arielle.”

“Sweetie, we can’t name the baby after Disney characters.”

“Why?” Emmy asked.

Oliver didn’t answer. Instead he asked, “How would you like Scarlett?”

“Urgh!” Emmeline made, shaking her head wildly.

“I guess that is a no,” Felicity told Oliver with a satisfied grin, and he struck the name off.

“Eleanor,” Felicity suggested her next name.

“Too many syllables,” Oliver replied, not giving her time to say anything more. “Cassandra.”

“That was the name of a terrible school bully in Vegas. So no.”

Emmeline climbed from her mother’s lap to run over to her toy box and play with her toddler laptop she had put in there earlier. Once she had begun to play, nothing could distract her. She was like her mother when it came to computers.

“Millicent,” Felicity named her next pick.

“Too similar to Maleficent.”

Felicity perked her eyebrows. “Are you going to read Disney into every name just to make me cross it off?”

Oliver grinned. “I could try.”

“So name another one of your picks.”

“Claire.”

“Oliver, I know that you have slept with a girl named Claire.”

“I didn’t!”

“Really?” Felicity asked. “And if I call Thea or Laurel they will say the same thing?”

Oliver perked his lips and crossed the name off. “I swear I didn’t think about her when I wrote that name down.”

“Name another name,” Felicity told him.

“It’s your turn.”

“I don’t care. Say another name.”

Oliver looked down on his list. Both of them were down to two names now. If they didn’t find a name that they liked both soon, their baby might indeed be born without a name.

“Okay, so this one is like my favorite girl name ever,” Oliver said.

“If you are trying to pressure me, let me tell you that it doesn’t work,” Felicity replied. “If you pick an awful name, I am not going to give it to my child.”

“It’s a great name,” Oliver said.

Felicity sighed. “Are you going to tell me the name or what?”

“Felicity.”

“Yes?”

“No,” Oliver said with a smile. “My favorite girl name is Felicity.”

“Yeah, but I am Felicity.”

“Our baby could be Felicity, too.”

“Wouldn’t it be strange to call our second daughter after me when we have one child with her own name? Besides, what happened to that whole letting-our-children-live-the-life-we-want-without-making-them-live-up-to-someone’s-legacy?”

“Fine,” Oliver grumbled, striking the name off. “So what is your next pick?”

Felicity looked down to her two remaining names and then said, “Olivia.”

When she looked up again, Oliver just stared at her like he was saying “Really?” with his eyes. Felicity grinned innocently, claiming, “I don’t know what that look means.”

“Olivia?”

“It’s a nice name.”

“Don’t you think it sounds a little too much like ‘Oliver’?”

“No?”

Oliver just gave her a look and Felicity struck the name off.

Now they were left with only one name each. That couldn’t go well. It just couldn’t. Felicity knew exactly that they wouldn’t find a name for their baby today. They would need at least one more round in this.

“Okay, let’s say the last names together,” Oliver suggested and Felicity nodded. “I count to three and then we say them. One, two, three.”

“Madeleine.”

Oliver and Felicity both stared at each other in disbelieve. They had spent so much time fighting about baby names for a girl and had never agreed to one except to Emmeline of course. But that had cost them a lot of thinking and a research in a web and-

“We have a name,” Felicity whispered and Oliver nodded.

They met in the middle of the couch, their lips melting together just like the rests of their bodies. Having a name just made everything so much more real. It was like they just now registered that they soon were really going to have another baby.

They spent almost all day on the couch, cuddling and talking to the baby – Benjamin Thomas Queen or Madeleine Grace Queen. Thanks to the fact that Roy had saved Emmeline before she had been born which had caused them to change Emmeline’s middle name from the planned Rose to Harper instead they still had the middle name for the second baby. It just felt so good to have a name. It was like if the baby was coming now, it would at least have a name.

Shortly before dinner Thea came over to pick up Emmeline for a girls night. Since Roy was out of town for a while and Thea was bored and kind of lonely in the giant penthouse, she had decided to pick up Emmeline for at least this one night. Emmy had been excited immediately. As much as she loved spending time with her parents and the unborn baby, spending time with Aunt Thea always meant watching a lot of TV and eating every possible piece of sugar there was.

“You know, I met Maddie during my last shopping tour,” Thea said to Oliver when they had put Emmeline to the car seat.

“Maddie?” Oliver asked.

“Madeleine Bowen, Carter’s sister,” Thea answered. “A pretty blonde you flirted with. I think you might have even slept with her.”

Felicity saw Oliver pressing his lips together. He obviously hadn’t remembered that Madeleine girl. Still, that meant that they would have to pick a new name. Felicity mentally struck Madeleine from the list.

“While you were still with Laurel,” Thea tried to give more hints, not sure whether her brother already remembered.

Felicity mentally struck that name off the list again and again until no letter of it could be seen anymore. She was so concentrated on that that she didn’t even hear what Thea had to say about that girl.

She only came back to here and now when Oliver touched her hand. Thea’s car was already at the end of the street and Felicity could just wave shortly before it trundled out of her sight.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked softly.

She looked at him and sighed. He looked so guilty. Sighing once more, she got up onto her tiptoes and kissed his lips.

“You get detention, Mr. Queen.”

“Detention?” he asked. “Felicity, what-“

“It’s Ms. Smoak, Mr. Queen,” Felicity replied harshly. She leaned her lips to his ears and whispered, “Ever since you said something about your hot teacher, I imagined playing out this little fantasy of yours. And now seems to be the right time. You need to be punished for your lack of knowledge.”

Oliver gulped, a slight smile playing on his lips. “Where will the detention take place, Ms. Smoak?”

“I think we will start in the bedroom. Your first task is to carry me since my feet hurt like hell.”

Chuckling, Oliver bent down and lifted her into his arms. She slid her arms around his neck.

“Thank you for not blaming me,” he said.

“You’re welcome.”

When he leaned forward to kiss her, though, Felicity slapped him lightly. “Trying to kiss your teacher? I think we will have to extend your detention, Mr. Queen.”

Oliver grinned amusedly. “I am at your mercy, Ms. Smoak.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The baby name talk will be continued in the next chapter when they will also find out the sex of the baby. ;)


	70. The name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am an idiot! I had that thing saved as a draft for the past six hours. Anyway, Here it is now! :)

How was it possible that a night out in the city, saving people and hunting criminals, wasn’t nearly as exhausting as one hour of discussing baby names with his wife?

“What about Darcy?” Oliver suggested the umpteenth name now.

Felicity scrunched her nose, making an indefinable sound that was something between a sigh and groan and meant ‘no’. He knew that much since he had heard that sound just as often as he had suggested a name by now. She put an arm above her eyes and released a sob. Oliver knew that it wasn’t just a reaction to the fact that they still hadn’t found a name, but also a result of the sleep problems she had since the baby refused to adapt Felicity’s sleep rhythm. Instead the baby would sleep almost all day and just wake up and move like crazy as soon as Felicity was trying to rest. Oliver gently massaged her calves, knowing that it helped her to relax lately.

Oliver knew that Felicity needed to relax after the last week had been full of stress. In addition to the little sleep she had gotten, she had also pressured herself to finding a baby name for a girl. Since they still didn’t know whether they were having their first boy or another girl, they needed names for both cases. Oliver had tried to convince Felicity to call the doctor and ask him if it was a boy or a girl, but she refused. She wanted to be surprised. Finding a boy name had been easy, finding a girl name not so much. A week ago they had found the perfect name, Madeleine Grace Queen. They had been in love with the name for several hours until it had turned out that Oliver had hooked up with a girl named Madeleine years ago. Since then the name was dead to both of them and they had started a new round in the fight for a baby name.

Felicity was only in her 27th week, so Oliver had argued that they could take their time and didn’t have to rush finding a name, but since Felicity had suffered from depression early in the pregnancy, she feared to fall back into her black whole during the last trimester as statistics claimed it happened often. So Felicity really needed to find a name. And Oliver knew that she wouldn’t fully relax before they had found one.

When she released a sigh and moved the arm from her eyes, she gazed at Oliver. She looked tired, sad, even slightly miserable. Oliver put her calves back to where they had rested on his thighs and gave her a look, asking whether she was ready to continue without saying a word. Sighing once more, she nodded.

Oliver grabbed the tablet from where he had put it next to him on the couch. He was that desperate about finding a name that he had actually started to look up names on the web and was no reading each one he thought he could accept of them to Felicity.

“Louise?”

Felicity slapped her hands in front of her eyes, growling loudly, another version of ‘no’.

Sighing, he switched the tablet off and put it to the couch table. They needed a break or otherwise they would go insane. He put one arm under her knees, the other around her waist and pulled her towards him until she was lying in his arms like a little baby.

“What if we make her middle name the first name. Grace. We could agree to that easily. Maybe it is easier when we are looking for a middle name.”

“I don’t want to name her Grace. I liked Madeleine. But we had to give up on that name because. Of. You,” she emphasized each of the last three words with a punch to his shoulder, but it wasn’t even strong enough to make Oliver flinch.

“At if we choose one of the names that you had on your list? I think I could agree to Charlotte.”

“No, you can’t because you would always think about Sex and the City. I want a name that we both really like, not one you agree to because you feel guilty. I want a perfect name like Emmeline and Madeleine before we found out that you had sex with a Madeleine,” she whined, but then looked at him seriously. “Oliver, should I ever find out that you had sex with a girl names Emmeline, I will kill you by ripping your heart out right after I cut your balls off.”

Oliver chuckled and leaned down, pressing her lips to Felicity’s.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I mean it,” she growled, but Oliver only leaned down to kiss her once more.

“Understood.”

Oliver lay down next to Felicity on the couch, his chest pressed to her back and his hand resting on her bump, feeling the baby kick.

“We still don’t have a name for when it’s a girl,” Felicity explained with a sigh. “And I am like hundred percent sure that it is going to be another girl.”

“You, too?” Oliver asked, kissing her right under her ear. “I thought I was the only one.”

“Nope, most definitely not,” Felicity said with a smile, her hand resting over Oliver’s. “So we agree that it is going to be a girl, but we also agree to disagree on girl’s names, right?”

Oliver chuckled. “I am sure we will find a name.”

“I don’t think so,” Felicity answered with her sigh and closed her eyes.

How did some couple have more than one girl? How did they decide on a name? They had agreed to Benjamin Thomas Queen so easily! Felicity was almost sure that it was easier to name two sons than it was to name two daughters. Or even one daughter.

“Baby’s not kicking,” Felicity whispered with a sigh. “I might fall asleep.”

“You sleep. I’ll hold you.”

 

 

When Oliver came home from work he quietly prayed that they didn’t have to go into the ring again. All he wanted to do today was cuddling with his two-and-half loved once on the couch, watch Nemo or Frozen or Arielle or whatever other movie his daughter was obsessed with today and enjoy some quality family time.

He went right into the kitchen, knowing that Felicity would be there. And of course he wasn’t disappointed. She stood at the kitchen counter, her upper body propped up onto her forearms as she leaned on the kitchen counter. It was a nice position, Oliver thought, leaning into the door frame. The way she was bent over the counter made her butt look perfectly welcoming to him. If Emmy wouldn’t sit in the living room, watching TV, he would easily walk over to Felicity, slide down her yoga pants and take her right here in the kitchen. Her long legs looked beautiful even in the yoga pants she was wearing. He let his eyes drift down her thighs and calves.

“Oliver, we need to talk.”

Only now Oliver realized that she had turned around. When he looked up, he was met with Felicity’s slightly accusing eyes. Instead of acting ashamed or embarrassed, he just smirked at her, asking, “Since when am I welcomed home with words instead of kisses?”

“Since you stared at my butt and my legs for the last minute instead of coming over and do something about it, I think it’s your own fault,” she replied, only stepping close enough to him to make the swell of her stomach touch his chest. He could still feel their baby kick against his abs.

“You look happy,” Oliver stated. “You found a name?”

One more week had passed, and they still hadn’t found one. At this point Oliver was desperate enough to agree to whatever name Felicity would suggest. As long as she was happy with the name, so would he be.

“Yes,” Felicity said with a nod.

“What is it?” Oliver asked, stepping forward and sliding his arms around her.

“I can’t tell you,” Felicity replied, straightening up onto her tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips. “Emmy will tell you. Only decided about the name because of her.”

“We are not naming the baby Pocahontas, right?”

He had said he would agree to any name, but there might be limits. He knew Emmeline. As much as he loved her, she wanted to name everyone after Disney characters. She had called Roy ‘Pascal’ like Rapunzel’s chameleon for a week.

“No,” Felicity laughed, moving out of his arms to take his hand and leading him into the living room where Emmy sat on the couch, playing with her toddler’s laptop.

“Hi, sweetie,” Oliver said.

“Hi, daddy,” Emmy replied, not caring enough to look up.

Felicity put her hands to Oliver’s shoulders, making him sit down next to their daughter and then sat down to Oliver’s other side, tugging her legs underneath her body.

“A little more excitement when daddy comes home, please,” Oliver complained.

Immediately Emmeline put her laptop away, stood up on the couch and threw herself into her daddy’s arms, yelling, “Daddy! You’re home!”

“That is the kind of excitement I meant,” Oliver chuckled, kissing his daughter’s cheek and sitting her down onto his lap.

“Tell daddy what you told me,” Felicity asked, tickling her daughter’s toes, making her giggle.

“Mommy sad ‘cause no name for my baby,” Emmy begun, but didn’t make any attempt to continue.

“And then what did you do?” Felicity asked.

Emmeline frowned, trying to remember what she had done after that. After almost a minute she climbed off her father’s lap and crawled onto her mothers, putting her little hands to her mother’s face just like she had done earlier that day and like she had seen her daddy doing it so often.

“Mommy, not be sad,” she said, using the exact same tone as when she had sad this sentence the first time today. “My baby is boy. He told me.”

Oliver waited a second if there was more to come, and then he leaned forward and kissed Emmy’s hair.

“That was very nice of you. To comfort mommy. I am proud of you,” he told her before turning to Felicity. “I just don’t see how that solves our problem because as much as I love Emmeline I doubt that she has second sight. And we both already agreed that we think it’s another girl.”

Emmy didn’t seem too interested in this conversation. She just pressed a kiss to the bump and slid off the couch to continue playing with her laptop. Felicity meanwhile moved closer to Oliver, so she could put her legs on his thighs and let his strong arms embrace her.

“Emmy has the strongest connection to the baby,” Felicity almost whispered. “Which is kind of ridiculous given that this baby grows inside of me, but I mean… she is like obsessed with her sibling since she knows that we are having a baby. She calls the baby ‘her baby’. She talks to the bump, plays with it, tries to feed it. I am sure that she is right and it is a boy and that has nothing to do with the fact that I called the doctor right after to end the torture and learn whether it is a boy or a girl and he agreed with Emmy. Nope, that didn’t have anything to do with it.”

Oliver just stared at her, and Felicity knew was about to come.

“You called the doctor?” he asked

“Yes.”

“Without me?”

“Yes.”

“What about letting ourselves be surprised?”

“Changed my mind.”

“Why didn’t you call me?”

“I was too tired to drive to QC, but I wanted to tell you in person,” Felicity answered, smiling innocently and framing her husband’s face. “I know you wanted us to find out together. So did I, but this torture of finding a girl’s name was unbearable and I thought I should deliver us from all the pain.”

Oliver looked at her wordlessly for a long moment. She wasn’t sure if he was going to yell at her. A little voice told her that he was going to explode out of anger that she hadn’t told him before she had called the doctor and that she had made him miss the moment of finding out. But Oliver didn’t yell.

“We’re having a baby boy?” he whispered.

Felicity nodded, barely managing to smile before Oliver’s lips attacked hers. He pressed her down into the cushions of the couch without putting all his weight to her stomach. His tongue opened her lips, and he slid his tongue into her mouth, teasing the roof of her mouth and her tongue.

They only pulled apart when they needed to catch their breaths. Oliver’s eyes were showing all the joy in the world, and Felicity’s heart skipped a beat when she realized that he was looking at her like she was his personal heaven.

“You do know that I would be just as happy if the baby had turned out to be a girl, right?”

“Momma bear and Benjamin Thomas Queen know that.”

“Who needs to breathe, right?” Oliver asked.

Felicity grinned, knowing exactly what he intended with that question. So without saying a word, she gripped the lapels of his suit jacked and just pulled her down until their lips melted against each others.

Oliver was right. Who needed to breathe?

 

 

They spent one week in their deliriously happy baby bubble as Felicity had started calling it. They talked to Benjamin Thomas Queen, calling him by his name now that they knew that they were expecting a boy. Felicity secretly believed that Oliver was actually kind of disappointed that it wasn’t another girl. He hadn’t said anything, but she had felt that way. Of course that didn’t mean that he loved the baby any less. No, he was just… nervous about it, Felicity decided in the lack of a better word. Having a boy was something different than having a girl, especially for Oliver.

Anyway, today was the perfect opportunity to spend some quality family time and reassure Oliver that everything was going to be okay and that his son wouldn’t suffer the same fate as he had. Their son wouldn’t make a lot of women hate him by screwing around whenever he got the chance (Felicity would personally take care of that), their son wouldn’t lose his father too soon (something else she would personally haven an eye on). Their son wouldn’t be tortured (no, not as long as his father and/or momma bear were there) and kept away from his family for years (no way!) and neither would he fall into darkness (never!). Oliver just needed to be reassured of that.

“Emmy, did you get the picture you drew for daddy?”

Emmeline shook her head, jumped from the chair she had climbed on to arrange the flowers on the breakfast table and ran upstairs. Felicity’s gaze followed her daughter with a smile. She had drawn at least twenty pictures and hadn’t been satisfied with any of those. None of those had been good enough for daddy’s birthday.

Felicity glanced at her watch. Where the hell was Oliver? When she had woken up one-and-a-half hours ago, he had snuck out of bed for his usual morning run. Felicity had pretended to still be asleep, but had only waited until he had pressed his lips to her forehead and had left the room to sneak out of bed herself. She had put on some clothes and taken Emmy downstairs, so they could prepare the birthday breakfast for Oliver. But Oliver still wasn’t home. Usually his morning run was taking an hour, sometimes longer, but that happened more often when he had had a bad day in the Arrow Cave. Most of the time he would actually come home sooner to crawl back into bed with her.

Maybe he was taking longer because he was avoiding everything that reminded him of his birthday. Oliver didn’t really like celebrating it which was mostly okay for Felicity. She hadn’t pushed him to invite people and celebrate it. She had even allowed him to use her pregnancy as an excuse. But she wanted at least this little family breakfast to be something special. As little as Oliver thought of himself sometimes, he was still the most important person in her and Emmeline’s life.

When Emmy came back downstairs, she placed the picture under the cushion of her chair, so her daddy wouldn’t see it when he came home and ran to her mommy, hugging her and pressing her head against the bump.

Other than Oliver and Felicity Emmeline was the only one who still knew that the baby was a boy. Felicity had insisted on keeping it a secret, no matter how often Oliver had argued that Emmy was going to tell everyone, anyway. He had obviously underestimated his daughter’s reliability when it came to her little brother. Not only hadn’t she told anyone that she knew the baby’s sex, she had even lied right into Thea’s face about it, claiming to have no idea. Felicity had thought that she had just forgotten at first since Emmy still was very young, but as soon as Thea had left the room she had laughed at her father, saying, “Pssst! Secret!”

They hadn’t told her about the name, though. Whenever she had overheard her parents discussing girls’ names, she had rejected each. And Oliver and Felicity didn’t want to risk their little girl rejecting the name they had picked for their baby boy. So they would tell her the name when the baby was born and just hope that she would accept it. Besides, in Emmy’s mind the baby was already names Nemo, so…

“When’s daddy coming?” Emmy asked, looking up to her mother. “I’m hungry!”

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “But if you want to, you can eat something already. Daddy won’t be mad.”

Emmeline shook her head and pressed her head back to the bump, murmuring, “No, wait for daddy.” Felicity stroked over her daughter’s hair with one hand, the other rubbing her back. Felicity refused to believe that Oliver wouldn’t even come home for the birthday breakfast. He knew that this was important to her and to Emmy.

There was actually just one place that Oliver would go and get lost on this day. And given the current circumstances Felicity should have known that this was going to happen.

“Emmy?”

“Yeah?”

“Would so mind spending some time with the Hoffman’s while mommy goes looking for daddy?”

“Take long?”

“No, I don’t think it will take long.”

So Felicity dropped Emmy off by their neighbors. Mrs. Hoffman had asked Felicity at least a thousand questions, including if the baby was coming, and she should take Felicity to the hospital. It had felt like half an eternity before Felicity had been able to get away from her. She had gotten in her car and driven to where she was sure to find Oliver. It wasn’t exactly easy to drive with the bump. She had no idea how other women drove during pregnancy. She was in her 29th week and felt like she could barely move her legs anymore. Getting out of the car was even worse than getting in had been. How come she couldn’t remember any problems like that from her first pregnancy?

Even before she had arrived at Tommy Merlyn’s grave, Felicity could see Oliver crouching in front of the grave stone. He wore his sweat pants and the green sweat jacket he usually wore when he was running. And he was sweaty. She could see the sweat on his face, and it would have surely been distracting, if there wasn’t pain showing in his eyes.

“How did you know where to find me?” he asked without looking up.

“I put a tracer on you,” Felicity replied. That made him look up, though, and Felicity rolled her eyes, explaining, “I think after more than three years of legal marriage and God knows how much years of marriage in our hearts I know you well enough for that.”

Oliver didn’t smile. He just turned his head back to the grave stone. Sighing, Felicity put a hand to his shoulder and held onto his for leverage as she crouched down next to him. With a groan she realized that that wasn’t exactly a smart idea. Her legs hurt like hell in this position and she couldn’t keep her balance, so she actually fell back onto her butt.

“We could have sat down on the bench,” Oliver said, nodding towards a bench under a tree and moving behind her, so she could lean against him.

“Too late. Now I am sitting here and I don’t believe that I can get up anytime soon,” she replied, reaching for his arms to put them around her and slid back on the floor, so she could move between his spread legs and even closer to him. Oliver didn’t waste a second to press his lips to her temple and take a deep breath, inhaling the scent of her skin.

Felicity didn’t say anything. She just let him hold her, knowing that he would open up as soon as he felt ready to do so. He would open up to her. He just needed a minute to sort out his thoughts.

“I didn’t even want to come here,” Oliver started with his voice barely louder than a whisper. “I just ran and ended up here and I thought I just talk to Tommy for a second, tell him that we’re having a son since I didn’t yet come around to tell him… but then I couldn’t leave.”

Felicity nodded and stroked his arms gently, but didn’t say anything. She knew that he needed to get this off his chest before she should say anything. So she just waited patiently for him to continue, offering comfort without pushing him to say something he wasn’t ready for yet.

“I miss him, Felicity,” he whispered, leaning his head against hers. “I don’t know why it’s suddenly so much worse than during the last years. I thought that I was over it as much as you could get over seeing your best friend die in your arms.”

“I think,” Felicity started quietly, “I have an idea about why you miss him so much lately.”

“Care to share your idea with me?” Oliver asked.

“We’re having a son,” Felicity just replied. “We’re having a son and you always imagined Tommy to be here when you have children.”

“We already have a child and it wasn’t as bad when you were pregnant with Emmy.”

“Yes,” Felicity answered with a chuckle, “but now it is a boy, and I know that you love both our children the same, but emotionally speaking there is a difference between having a boy and having a girl regarding your feelings about Tommy. I mean… when Emmeline will be in the age where she doesn’t feel like she can tell her parents everything, she will probably go to Thea and ask her for advice. And our son will probably go to John which I know is okay for you, but part of you still wished that you could tell him to go to Tommy. And Tommy would tell him a lot of the stupid things the two of you have done in your youth and you would get mad at Tommy for telling our child such things and-”

“Is that all still part of your theory?”

“It might have gotten a little out of hand during talking, but… yes.”

Oliver looked at the gravestone without saying anything. Felicity could see in his eyes how he was imagining the scenario she had presented him. The corner of his mouth twitched shortly, but not enough to form a smile.

“Maybe you’re right” Oliver replied with a sigh, turning his head to press his lips to her cheek.

“Maybe?”

“Probably.”

“I’d say ‘definitely’, but I take what I can get.”

Felicity turned her head to look at him and found that he still wasn’t smiling. So there was more that burdened him. Instead of saying anything, she just squeezed his hand and smiled at him encouragingly.

“There is something I have thought about lately,” Oliver said, and inhaled deeply. His eyes turned towards her only shortly before they focused on the gravestone once more. “It’s about the baby.”

Oliver didn’t even have to say it for Felicity to know what was going to come. Since they had found out that they were having a body they had constantly called him by his name, Benjamin, the name Oliver had picked with her consent. Not now.

Oliver didn’t continue. He just stared at the gravestone. Felicity thought about waiting until he asked, but she could see the struggle in his face. He was still discussing whether he should ask her about what he wanted.

“You want to name him Thomas.” The way Oliver looked at her in surprise only made her chuckle, and she shook her head. “I think I should be offended by how little you think I know you.”

“Sorry?” Oliver asked. Felicity only chuckled again, shaking her head once more. She knew that he actually knew exactly how well she knew him. Oliver frowned at her, not saying anything before he asked, “Would you be okay with that? I know that we have agreed on Benjamin Thomas, but now that we are really having a son it just… it’s like something is different and it feels right to name him Thomas. But we don’t have to of course. I know you barely knew Tommy. I just… I just think it would be nice to honor my friend by naming our son after him.”

“So we name him Thomas. I’ve been open for that name from the beginning. You were the one who said you didn’t want it. We could even name him Thomas Robert Que- Oliver, really?!” she interrupted herself when Oliver looked at her like she had been reading his mind. “You know that I know you better than anyone else, probably even better than you know yourself. I was actually thinking that pregnancy was messing with my brain when you did not ask about the change of the name immediately.”

“So you knew this was going to happen?”

“Of course. It was part of the reason why I insisted on not telling Emmy abot the name. Other part of it is that she still tries to convince me to name him Nemo and I do not want to have to deal with a pouting child for the rest of the pregnancy, so…“

She made a gesture and shrugged her shoulders, looking at Oliver who smiled at her in awe. He leaned down and kissed her gently. Whispering a dozen ‘I love you’s against her lips before he completely pulled back and said, “If I hadn’t married you twice already, I would be asking you to marry you know.”

“I think more than one wedding each year would be slightly exaggerating.”

“You think?”

“Yeah, kind of,” she smiled.

“So you would really be okay with it? Naming him Thomas?”

Felicity took his hand and put it to her bump where she could feel the baby kicking, making him feel what she felt.

“I think he approves, so yes,” Felicity said and smiled at him.

“Thank you.”

“Not for that,” she said with a smile. “You could be thankful that I am not blaming you for almost starving this morning.”

“Why didn’t you just start breakfast without me?”

“Oliver, have you met our daughter? I tried to eat just a little piece of a muffin, and she almost killed me. Even when she got hungry, I wasn’t allowed to touch the foot.”

“Muffin… You didn’t bake again, did you?”

Felicity bit her tongue, keeping the not so appropriate words for a cemetery that were threatening to come from her mouth back. “No.”

“Good. I don’t think we would have survived that.”

Her baking really wasn’t that bad. Oliver just tried to make it that bad to finally be better at something. Felicity was sure of that.

She leaned her head back against his shoulders and looked at the grave. Thomas Robert Queen. She liked the sound of that. No matter what Oliver had said about letting the child life his/her own life and not forcing it to live up to someone’s legacy which Felicity agreed to by the way, she still thought the idea of naming their child after people Oliver had loved at lost was a good idea.

Just because their child was named after a man who was known screwing around in his youth and a man who didn’t only cheat on his wife multiple times, but shot himself and left his son with the almost unbearable burden to save the city after shooting himself in front of said son, didn’t mean that their son would suffer the same fate. Neither would he feel forced to follow in their footsteps by building and leading a multi-billion company or help his best friend open a night club or whatever else Oliver feared their son would feel pressured to do.

Thomas Robert Queen would live the life he would want. Honoring deceased men by naming him after them wasn’t going to change that.

They stayed like that for a while before Felicity sighed and said, “Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“I’m still starving.”

Chuckling, he let his head fall to her shoulder before he pressed a kiss to the underside of her jaw and got up, saying, “Come on, it’s time for breakfast.”

“Okay, but I think you gotta help me get up because Tommy is probably gaining weight while we are talking,” she said, putting her head back to look at him. Oliver bent down and hooked his arms under hers and lifted her to her feet easily. She adjusted her clothes shortly and was already heading towards the exit when Oliver held her back with a gentle hand to her arm. Perking her eyebrows, she turned around to him.

“Felicity,” he began softly. “I know I could have just talked to you about all of this. I know that you know me better than anyone and that you understand me better than anyone. I don’t know why I didn’t come to you right away. Maybe I didn’t really get what was going on and what I needed to fix it before you told me, but… it felt good that I got this off my chest, so what I am trying to say is… Thank you for knowing me that well.”

Smiling, Felicity stepped in front of him, put her arms around his neck.

“I’m sweaty,” he said.

“I know. It’s amazing,” she replied, pressing her lips to his in a loving kiss. “Happy Birthday, Oliver.”


	71. To get what I want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was prompted by my and Time for a story's first fan ever! <3

“I can’t believe we are doing this,” Felicity groaned, and tried to find a comfortable position in the leather seat of the passenger seat. Now that she was in her 30th week of pregnancy, the bump was that huge that she had trouble to find a comfortable position to stay in for longer than five minutes, no matter if she wanted to stand, sit or lie down. “Emmeline spends the whole day with Roy and Thea, so why aren’t we using the time to have a lot of sex because soon we will have to go without it for a long, long time.”

Having sex was trouble already. The number of positions that worked despite the bump and that didn’t tire Felicity out within minutes because she was getting tired pretty quickly lately was limited to like a handful. And with Emmy’s continual desire to be close to her unborn baby brother it wasn’t exactly easy to find time for sex either. The toddler had decided that she was going to sleep in her parents’ bed as long as the baby wasn’t born, so her baby always knew that she was there for him. When Oliver tried to carry her back to her own bed, she would immediately wake up and look at him angrily, insisting on being carried back to her baby as she still called him.

When Felicity continued to move around, still trying to find a comfortable position for the drive to the nursery shop Oliver had insisted on going today, Oliver reached over and changed the position of the back rest of her seat until she sighed in comfort and put both her hands on the belly.

“You know,” he said then, “we already had sex today. Twice. I thought we could use a little break. Besides, if we take Emmy here, she is going to question each of our decisions. I wanted her to be excited for her brother, but I didn’t thought she was going to act like she can make all the decisions. She is just too excited about her little brother.”

“You know, if you feel like we need a break after two rounds of sex, I feel like I should be really, really worried about our marriage,” Felicity replied, ignoring everything else he had said since in her mind it was Oliver’s fault Emmeline was that exciting about the baby anyway. He had infected her with his overexcitement, and now he was paying the price.

Chuckling, Oliver put his hand to Felicity’s on the bump. He let himself enjoy the kicking of their son for a short moment before he took Felicity’s hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing her knuckles.

“I adore you,” he said, kissing her hand once more. “And I promise you that we will have sex at least twice more today. As soon as we are done with the shopping.”

Felicity groaned once more. When they had moved into the now house, Emmy had gotten new furniture, and Oliver had given all of the old furniture to the community welfare association since they could easily allow themselves to buy new furniture with every new child. Only that Felicity really wasn’t in the mood to buy new furniture and whatever else they needed right now. Her feet and back were hurting, she was tired and all she wanted to do with the day was spending it in bed, cuddling and having sex.

Oliver had dropped Emmy at Thea’s early this morning. Thea had had a whole day planned out for her goddaughter, her boyfriend and herself. She was even trying to get Emmeline to spend the night over at their place, but Emmeline was determined to come back home to the baby for the night. Anyway, when Oliver had returned, they had started their first round of sex today. They had made love unhurriedly and lovingly, taking their time to pleasure each other. After that Oliver had suggested they should go to the nursery shop, but they, especially Felicity, had gotten distracted when Oliver had tied her shoelaces. He had turned his back towards her and lifted her left foot between his legs, keeping her leg up by holding it between his knees. Then he had bent down to tie her shoelaces, giving Felicity a perfect view on his even more perfect butt. And the second round had started.

And now here they were, arriving at the nursery shop. It wasn’t that Felicity generally disliked the idea of going shopping for the baby, but going shopping anything baby related with Oliver was just as exhausting as going shopping clothes with Thea. Oliver would deny it, but he was addicted to shopping baby articles just like his sister was addicted to buy clothes. So she knew that everything they needed and she would be able to buy within minutes with the help of the internet or Lyla as her shopping consultant would take hours to buy with Oliver.

“Oliver, we’ll only buy the furniture for the nursery,” Felicity reminded him, when he had parked the car and was helping her out of her seat. As much as Felicity normally hated to have him hovering around her to try and help, she enjoyed it right now because it allowed her to be perfectly lazy and whine like a little child and make him hurry, so they could go back sooner. “We don’t buy baby clothes or anything else today.”

“But if we’re already here, we-“ Oliver started, but stopped at Felicity’s annoyed glare. “Just the furniture. I promise.”

 

 

She would kill him. As soon as she had found him in the endless room of this store and between all these people, she would so going to kill him. And she wouldn’t even wait until she had dragged him home. No, she would kill him right here in front of all of these people. And then she would take the keys from his pockets, drive home and enjoy a long bath.

Sighing, Felicity straightened up unto her tiptoes and tried to find Oliver, but of course he was nowhere to be seen. She massaged the hurting small of her back and tried not to concentrate on the throbbing pain in her feet when she continued walking to find her husband.

Of course he hadn’t kept his promise to buy just the furniture. As soon as they had decided on a nursery and had ordered all the pieces of furniture they needed, Oliver had suggested taking at least a short look at the strollers. Apparently Oliver had given all of the baby articles they had bought for Emmy away when they had moved.

“Of course he has, he loves shopping for babies,” Felicity growled to herself angrily, knowing that they had so much more room to store all those things in the basement of their new home than they had had in their first home.

After the strollers he had dragged her to the baby seats and then to a bunch of other things – baby bathtubs, baby scales, baby slings, baby blankets and God knew what else – until she had lost him when a one of the shop assistants had asked him whether he knew the baby monitors that didn’t only audio- and videotaped the baby, but were also connected to a baby sensor mat that alarmed when the baby was sleeping restless or stopped breathing for more than twenty seconds. Within a heartbeat Oliver had hurried after that assistant and Felicity had lost sight of him.

She wanted to go home! They had been here for hours now although Felicity had promised herself that they were getting out of here after half an hour the latest. Whatever else they needed for the arrival of little Tommy from now on, Felicity would go shopping on her own. Or she would send Oliver alone. But she definitely wou-

When she finally saw him, Oliver stood next to a cart with a bunch of baby articles. Felicity only recognized a few of them, but she had been too distracted mentally cursing Oliver anyway to remember what he had picked to buy. He was standing in front of the door to the stock, probably waiting for the shop assistant to get a few of the things they could already take with them today. Only the furniture had to be ordered. It was going to be delivered within the next two weeks.

Anyway, was Felicity bothered wasn’t that Oliver had decided to buy all those things or that he was obviously waiting for a shop assistant to hand him even more articles. What Felicity bothered was that her husband was talking to a very long-legged, very thin and unbelievable beautiful blonde woman that looked very much not pregnant. The woman – really was she a beauty queen?! And what was she doing in a nursery store when she wasn’t having a baby?! Trying to hook up with fathers-to-be?! – was standing inappropriately close to Oliver, especially since her hands were resting on his forearms that Oliver had crossed in front of his broad chest. And they were laughing.

Growling quietly, Felicity pushed herself through the people around, approaching Oliver and that… woman. They still hadn’t noticed her when the blonde took a step back and pulled her hands back to herself. Oh, yes, she better stop touching my man, Felicity thought before putting on a tight smile and stepping right next to Oliver.

“Here you are, honey,” she said in her sweetest voice and put her hands to his bicep. She smiled up at him. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Well, we both did. Your son really missed you.”

Felicity stroked over the bump shortly. Oliver had his head turned towards her and opened his mouth to say something, but Felicity hastily straightened up onto her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his, using the opportunity of his open lips to stroke her tongue into his mouth shortly. She could feel his hesitation, but he did kiss her back. As soon as she felt his tongue moving against her though, she pulled back like he had been the one kissing her, turning away from him and to the blonde.

“I’m sorry,” Felicity said, still smiling as well as she could. “Hi, I’m Felicity, Oliver’s wife.”

She reached out a hand, and the blonde shook it with a smile that showed surprise and maybe a little amusement. “Hi, I am Madeleine Bowen. Oliver’s and my parents were friends, so we know each other since childhood.”

Felicity barely heard the second part of the sentence since she was too distracted by the name. Madeleine Bowen. Carter Bowen’s sister. A woman Oliver had slept with, but hadn’t remembered when they had talked about baby names weeks ago which had let to them falling in love with the name Madeleine until Thea had reminded him of his past with a Madeleine. The only reason they had found a name for their baby nonetheless was because he had turned out to be a boy. If they were having a girl, she still wouldn’t have a name.

Felicity had never met Madeline Bowen before, her brother several times, but never her, and still she was like a red bag to a bull for Felicity already.

“Are you here with your husband?” Felicity asked.

“Oh no, I-“

“Yeah, it’s better coming without men here anyway,” Felicity interrupted hastily. “I mean, look at the bunch of things in the cart. I could swear that we don’t even need half of them, but Oliver is so addicted to this entire baby shopping and everything. I hoped that it would get less with the second baby, but he is still so excited. I mean, Oliver is such a great dad, so caring and giving. He is our daughter’s favorite parent, and I know I should be offended about that, but it is impossible to be mad them because they are just so cute together. Wait, I’ll show you photos!”

Felicity reached into her bag for her phone. She noticed the amused expression in Oliver’s face when he looked at Madeleine Bowen. Of course he was amused. First he had had fun shopping and then he had enjoyed talking to a beautiful blonde that unlike his wife didn’t look like a whale and that he had probably hot memories of now that he remembered having slept with her once.

Well, Felicity had her strategies for that. As soon as her protective-wife-senses alarmed her of a possible disturbance of their happy marriage, she automatically worked through the six different steps of her protecting-my-marriage-at-any-cost-plan until the disturbance was removed.

Step 1 – Calling Oliver cute names like “babe”, “sweetie” or “honey”.  
Step 2 – A slightly inappropriate kiss for when people were around.  
Step 3 – Keeping close contact to her husband while introducing herself as Oliver’s wife.  
Step 4 – Telling the disturbance about Oliver’s dedication to his family.  
Step 5 – Showing a series of photos of Oliver and Emmy that were saved on her phone for exactly this reason.

“See?” Felicity asked, stepping next to Madeleine Bowen and showing her the first photos.

Those were some of her favorite photos of the time since Emmeline’s birth. Photos of when she had been so unbelievably tiny that every time Oliver had held her in her arms, everyone around had been scared that he might actually crush her with his muscles. Photos of when Emmy had been growing and had discovered that Oliver’s beard was highly interesting. Photos of when all three of them had cuddled in bed. Photos of their family now that she was pregnant again, and both, Oliver and Emmy, were obsessed with the soon to be born addition to their family.

Felicity’s thumb was hovering over the screen, ready to go over to the final sixth step when-

“Hi, sweetie, sorry it took me so long, but the traffic is horror right now.”

Felicity looked up surprised, eying up the pregnant, redheaded woman that now stood to Madeleine Bowen’s other side and looked at the blonde woman with an expression of adoration and-

“Hi,” Madeleine smiled, pressing a kiss to the redhead’s lips. “Allie, these are Oliver and his wife Felicity.”

“Oh, nice to meet you,” the redhead said, shaking first Oliver’s and then Felicity’s hand. “I guess you are using the last weeks to buy everything you need? How far along are you?”

Felicity was too speechless due to the surprise of Madeleine Bowen’s girlfriend or wife and the fact that she was very much pregnant to answer. All she could do was staring.

“Thirty weeks,” Oliver answered, the amused grin still on his face. “We dropped our toddler at my sister’s place to get all of this done a little more quickly.”

Allie laughed. “Oh, yes, my brother is watching our son right now, so we can buy everything we need, but we have actually more time. I am only in my twenty-third week. Anyway, I hope I am not rude, but I have an appointment later and-“

“Oh, no, actually Felicity and I are only waiting for the stroller and the baby seat to be brought and then we head home, too. I think I have tried her patience enough for today. She has been begging me to leave for hours now. I think if I don’t take her home she is going to kill me any second.”

Allie laughed again and shook Oliver’s hand goodbye before leaning towards Felicity and mumbling, “They just don’t understand how exhausting being pregnant is.”

“It was nice seeing you again, Oliver,” Madeleine said, shaking Oliver’s hand. “Felicity.”

When the two of them left, Felicity stared after them.

What the hell had just happened? She had been so sure that Madeleine had flirted with Emmeline when she had approached them. She had had her hands on Oliver. Women who touched her husband belonged to the possible-disturbance-category and given her history with Oliver she had pretty much belonged to that category.

“Thank God, you didn’t go over to step six. It would have been really embarrassing to show her an after-sex-photo under these circumstances.”

Biting her tongue, Felicity turned her head. Her lips were pressed together tightly, her eyes sparkling with anger.

“Wipe that smirk off your face, Oliver,” she growled. “This is all your fault. If you hadn’t gone totally crazy about this baby shopping thing and hadn’t left me alone, I wouldn’t have mistaken het touching you and laughing with you as a try to flirt with you.”

“Hey, I offered you to hold my hand, so you wouldn’t get lost in the crowd, but you were pouting.”

Oliver was still grinning. Of course he was. He loved teasing her.

“Why was she touching you anyway? I don’t go around touching everyone like that, especially not other women’s husbands.”

“Well,” Oliver answered. “She was just so surprised to find me in a nursery store and told me that she is very happy that I seem to be that happy, and then I told her that I have found the love of my life and that we are already having our second baby, and then she told me that she has found the love of her life and that they are expecting their second child, too. And then we laughed that be both seem to be so much more excited about the whole baby shopping thing than our partners, and that we had never believed this years ago, and we laughed and then you came rushing to us and were so jealous and-“

“I wasn’t jealous!” Felicity interrupted him.

Oliver cocked his head and perked his eyebrow in doubt, but Felicity didn’t get to answer right away since a shopping assistant with two big packages on a cart came out of the stock. Oliver put one of them to their cart and lifted the other over his shoulder effortlessly. Nodding his head towards the checkout area, he started pushing the cart. People around them, especially women, stared which made Felicity roll with her eyes.

“So you weren’t jealous?” Oliver recommenced the topic.

“No, I wasn’t jealous,” Felicity replied. “I was just making sure that your ex-lover – a still very creepy word by the way – knows that you are very happily married. Even if I look more like a whale than-“

“Hey, nobody’s allowed to offend my wife,” Oliver interrupted, but Felicity ignored that.

“-like a wife right now, you are still my husband, and I was making sure that she knew that.”

Oliver snorted which made Felicity frown even more. Pouting, she crossed her arms in front of her chest and stared away, punished him with silence. She didn’t say a word until they were at the car and Oliver packed all the stuff into the trunk. She could see from the corner of her eyes that Oliver was still grinning.

“I don’t even get why this is such a big deal to you,” Felicity snapped at him. “You are jealous all the time, and you are not even subtle about it. You just go G.I. Joe at every man who even looks at me, and that is so okay for you, but if I show a woman who is touching you, and who you have slept with a few nice photos of you and Em-“

Within a heartbeat Oliver had turned around, framed her face with his hands and pressed his lips to hers gently. His tongue opened her lips to him, and as soon as the tip of his tongue moved against hers, Felicity sighed and melted into him, her arms coming around his neck. When they pulled apart, Oliver was still grinning and Felicity let her head fall to Oliver’s shoulder with a groan.

“You’re very cute when you’re jealous,” Oliver chuckled, stroking his hands up and down her back.

Felicity opened her eyes, seeing nothing but the skin of his neck that wasn’t covered by his shirt or his leather jacket. Smirking, she leaned her head forward and pressed her lips to his skin. She opened her mouth and sucked his kind into her mouth.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked after a while, but Felicity could only murmur because she was still sucking his skin. “Are you giving me a hickey?”

When Felicity released his neck, she wiped away that little spit there was on his skin, and eyed up her work in adoration. A perfect purple spot had built where she had sucked his neck.

“Feeling better?” he asked.

Felicity put her head back and smiled at him. “Now that I marked you as mine, yes.”

“I am never allowed to mark you anywhere it could be seen,” Oliver replied.

Doubtingly Felicity looked down to the bump and back up at Oliver. “You’re serious? This is the biggest mark there is, and it is a lot more permanent than that little hickey.”

Chuckling, Oliver leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her lips, whispering “I love you” against them.

“How about we go to the DIY market and buy paint? Emmy and I can start preparing Tommy’s room tomorrow, so we can set up the furniture as soon as it will be delivered, and the room will be ready before the last weeks start and-“

“Yes, that’s a good idea,” Felicity interrupted him.

Oliver perked his eyebrows. “Really? I thought you would fight me on this and insist on going home.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “You know, now that I know that it’s not on me but on you, I guess I can stop pretending and…”

She made a gesture with her hand instead of finishing the sentence. It made Oliver only frown even more. Felicity had to bite her tongue to not burst out into laughter.

“What exactly is not on you but on me?” Oliver asked, obviously irritated by her words.

Felicity took a look around like she was making sure that nobody listened. Then she took a step forward and whispered, “I mean… Oliver, our sex life is… awful. To say the least.”

She had to bite her tongue even harder at the expression in Oliver’s face. He looked taken aback like she had just slapped him right into the face. Staring at her with wide eyes, he muttered, “What?”

“Yeah, well, I was totally faking it those last years because I thought that it was all my fault. I mean, you had a certain reputation to be a great lover, so I thought it had to be my fault that our sex life sucked so much,” Felicity continued and for the briefest second couldn’t contain her amused grin. It was enough for Oliver to realize what she was doing. He huffed a short laugh before he perked his lips, nodding knowingly, and waited for her to continue which she did. “But now that I know that not only one but two of your ex-girlfriends gave up on men and started dating girls after being with you…”

She could see Oliver bite his tongue. Felicity knew his weak spots and offending his manhood and his skills as a lover was definitely one of those.

“Strange thing that you never complained before,” Oliver replied.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Like I said. I thought it was on me since my experience wasn’t as… wide as yours. Anyway, now that I know that other girls have obviously had the same problem as I do now, I guess we can stop pretending and-“

“Miss Smoak,” Oliver interrupted her, but Felicity only grinned.

“Oh, do you think your lack of satisfying me will be enough of a reason to annul our marriage?”

Felicity was now openly grinning at Oliver, not even trying to hide it. Neither was Oliver. She knew that she had won already. They were so not going to go to that DIY store. They were going to go home and then she was going to get all the sex that she should have gotten all day long already.

“I’ll bring back the cart and you get the car ready for our trip to the DIY shop,” she said nonetheless.

She was already turning around and heading to take away the cart when Oliver grabbed her by the upper arm and pulled her back, so her back rested flush against his chest. He lowered his lips to her ear, so they were brushing against it several times when he said, “You’ll get in the car. I’ll take the cart away, and when I come back, we will head home, and I will remind you of how much you actually enjoy sex with me.”

A comfortable shiver ran down her spine at the thought of what Oliver would do to her. But she knew that the more she teased, the more fun they were going to have the rest of the day. So Felicity shrugged her shoulders and replied, “Oh, don’t bother. I don’t think it’s worth the effort.”

Oliver pressed himself closer to her back, growling, “You. Car. Now.”

He lowered his head to the crook of her neck and bit down on her soft flesh gently, making her moan out quietly.

“I’ll take away the cart,” Oliver added and headed off.

Felicity smiled to herself. Oh yes, that was going to be a great, great, great afternoon.


	72. To give you what you want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I was asked to write a follow-up to the last chapter, here we go with some smut.   
> Haven't written smut in a while now, but it as fun. :D

Felicity had her eyes closed, a small smile playing on her lips.

They were finally on their way home from the nursery store where they had spent endless hours, buying stuff Baby Tommy probably wouldn’t even need, but Oliver had insisted on buying all of it anyway, and where they had met Oliver’s ex Madeleine Bowen which had led to a slight jealousy on her side. Only that it had been completely unnecessary given the fact that she had a girlfriend or wife, a very pregnant girlfriend or wife by the way.

Felicity had teased Oliver. She had offended his skills as a lover, driving him crazy to get what she wanted. And now there were only minutes separating her from a lot of great sex. Angry-Oliver-trying-to-prove-his-sexual-skills-sex was the best sex in the world. It was a little rough, very long and-

All her thoughts came to a sudden stop when she felt Oliver’s fingertips against the inside of her thigh, traveling upwards while keeping the contact to her skin feather-light. Felicity’s smile widened.

“Oliver, what are you doing?” she asked, not opening her eyes.

“Driving us home?” Oliver asked innocently.

“That is what your left hand is- oh, yes!” Felicity’s words were interrupted by her own moan when his fingertips move against her lace panty underneath her dress. She took a deep breath, gripping the side of her seat tightly. “And what is your right hand doing?”

“Having some fun?” Oliver asked.

She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that Oliver was smirking. She could hear it in the tone of his voice. His fingers moved over the fabric of her panty lazily, up and down and up again. The lace was a soaked within seconds.

“Oh, yes,” Felicity moaned again, arching her back as much as the bump allowed her to, when Oliver pushed the fabric aside and began stroking her wet folds.

“You’re enjoying this?” Oliver asked.

Felicity was already about to answer with a strong “Yes!” when she remembered the game they were playing. After they had met Madeleine Bowen and her wife/girlfriend, Oliver had teased Felicity about her jealousy. So she had teased him back, claiming that she had never had fun with their sex life and just hadn’t said something because she had thought that it was her fault. Now that she knew that two of his girlfriends had chosen to start dating girls after sleeping with him, though, she knew that the lack of pleasure was all on him. That was what would get her a lot of sex today.

“Fe-li-ci-ty?” Oliver said in his usual singsong when saying her name, and pushed a finger inside of her, making her whimper quietly. “Are you enjoying this?”

He curled his finger inside of her, making her gasp for breath and grip the seat more tightly. She shook her head fiercely. “No. No. No. No, just- just- just faking it.”

“Hm…” Oliver hummed and pressed his thumb to her clit.

The orgasm took Felicity by surprise. The pleasure washed over her with a sudden intensity that made her eyes rip open. Her right hand let go of the seat to grip Oliver’s wrist, keeping it between her thighs while she moved her hips as good as she could with the seat belt and the bump pressing her against the backrest of her seat. She rode his finger, prolonging her orgasm.

“Yes, that sounded very faked,” Oliver commented with a grin. “Especially those moans and that quiet scream.”

Felicity opened her eyes and had to hold back another moan at the sight in front of her. Oliver licked her juices from his fingers. His eyes were focused on the street ahead, the street they were living in. She could already see their house. The house in which they were going to have even more hot sex.

“That was a scream of boringness,” Felicity replied, yawning.

“Boringness?” Oliver asked. His hands gripped the steering wheel more tightly. His eyes narrowed when he directed the car into the garage and closed the garage gate behind him with a simple press to a button on the dashboard.

Oh, she was so going to have even more sex. She was going to have so much great sex today.

“You,” Oliver said, pointing his finger at her, “out of the car. Right now.”

Without another word Oliver opened his door and climbed out of the car himself. Felicity followed, starting to round the car to get to the door that was linked to their basement, but was stopped halfway by Oliver who stood right in front of her.

She looked up at him with a questioning, challenging gaze. “What? Tired already?”

Not saying a word, Oliver let his leather jacket fall to the floor. He grinned down at her for a short moment before he gripped her hips, lifted her from the floor and sat her down onto the hood of the car. Immediately he lowered his lips to the crook of her neck, licking, sucking and biting the sensitive skin. When she pushed her hands under the fabric of his dress shirt, Oliver grabbed her wrists and pushed them away, enjoying her groan. He pushed her hands back until they were put to the hood of the bar behind her. He then moved his hands to the hem of her dress and pushed it up until the fabric was pooled around her hips.

Felicity pressed her lips together and held back a moan when Oliver went down onto his knees in front of her, pushing her legs apart and kissing first the inside of her right and then of her left thigh. The rough tips of his fingers moved from her knees up her thighs to her hips until they reached the fabric of her panties and pulled them down.

“Hm… not even ripping them from my body…” Felicity said with a pretended sigh of disappointment. “You really cancel the one hot thing you do to pull my panties down an- Oh, God!”

She let her head fall back with a moan and bit down on her bottom lip when Oliver’s lips attacked her wet folds, licking up and down her slit in slow, even movements. Her thighs were trying to move together, to squeeze his head between them and to hold him where he was, but Oliver held his hands to her knees, keeping her legs spread while he kept licking her.

“Oh God,” Felicity moaned, “this is so, so, so boring.”

Oliver chuckled against her wet lips. His warm breath was ghosting over her wetness, sending jolts of pleasure through her body, and making her moan out even louder.

“You don’t exactly sound bored, Felicity,” Oliver murmured against her softness, licking up her slit once more. The tip of his tongue moved against her clit slowly.

“But I am,” Felicity said, gritting her teeth to pull herself together and make her voice sound stronger. “So, so, so, so bored.”

Oliver hummed, sucking her clit into his mouth. Felicity could feel her pleasure increasing quickly. Her skin became hotter and hotter. Her toes started tingling with the great expectation of the pleasure that was soon going to wash over her whole body. She could feel the pleasure come closer and closer. She let out a soft moan and moved her hips against his lips, already letting her head fall back to enjoy what was going to happen next when suddenly Oliver moved his lips away from her clit and to the inside of her thigh, too far away from her center.

“What are you doing?” she whined, looking down at where he still cowered between her legs. His lips were almost down to her knee by now, and he smirked up at her.

“Didn’t want to bore you any longer,” Oliver explained with a shrug of his shoulders. “I mean… when I can’t pleasure you, we should maybe just… stop.”

Felicity bit her tongue. Usually she would whine and beg him to continue, but the smug smile on his face, stopped her from doing so. She perked her lips, trying to figure out what to do, and then just smiled evilly.

“You’re right,” she said. “Maybe you should just stop.”

Oliver raised his eyebrows. “We should?”

Felicity nodded, moving her right hand from the hood of the car to her hip and between her legs. She put her fingers right to her clit, circling it.

“You go ahead and do what you want to do while I will have a little fun with myself.”

She let her head fall back, moaning at her increasing pleasure. She knew Oliver. She knew that the sight of her pleasuring herself would be enough to-

Oliver growled lowly, pushed her hand away from her and moved her legs over his shoulder, giving him better access to enter her with his tongue which he did immediately. His tongue moved in and out of her, teasing her entrance and then licking her inner walls.

Moaning, Felicity arched her back and gripped his hair, pulling his lips closer to her. She moved her hips against his face as much as the bump allowed her to. His tongue was pressing against her inner walls, his nose moved over her clit.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she moaned when her pleasure increased. “So close.”

Again Oliver stopped, looking up at her. “So close to what, Felicity?”

“Close to move from totally bored to less bored,” Felicity replied breathlessly.

“Oh, and I was thinking you were going to have an orgasm.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Like that will ever happen.”

“And still you want this to continue.”

“I’m rather bored with you than pleasured by somebody else.”

Oliver’s eyes softened. For a short moment both of them forgot their game. Oliver got up from the floor and pressed his lips to hers, framing her face with his hands. Felicity could taste herself on his tongue and moaned softly into his mouth. They smiled against each other’s lips when they felt Tommy kicking.

“So…” Oliver said once they pulled apart. “Where were we?”

“Moving from totally bored to less bored,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver nodded and got back down onto his knees. Locking eyes with her, he lowered his lips back onto her clit. He licked and sucked until she was moving against him quickly, moaning out loudly again and again at the increasing pleasure. When her toes started tingling this time, he didn’t pull back. Feeling how close she was, he bit down on her clit gently, and Felicity fell off the edge, screaming.

She could feel Oliver smirking against her sensitive nub, but that couldn’t stop her body from shaking or stop the soft moans that came out of her mouth. He kept licking her until she came down from her high.

“Feeling less bored?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded. “A little less bored, yes.”

Oliver grinned and held his hand out to help her off the hood. She almost fell against him since her legs felt wobbly. Oliver lifted her into his arms, kissing her softly.

“Hm,” she hummed against his lips, sliding her arms around his neck. “This is slightly hot. Maybe you have a chance on pleasure me after all.”

“Really?” Oliver asked. “In that case we should continue working on my skills, hm?”

Felicity nodded. “Working on your skills is a very good idea.”

He carried her out of the garage and into their house. His lips never let go of hers. His tongue kept exploring the inside of her mouth. His teeth scraped over her bottom lip, biting down softly and tugging.

Felicity grabbed the collar of his dress shirt and ripped it open, the buttons falling to the floor. Oliver pulled away from her, cocking his head.

“What was that?”

“I am getting totally bored again.”

“Oh, we can’t let that happen, can we?” he asked, putting her back onto the floor and turning her around, so her back was pressed to his chest.

They were standing at the foot of the stairs. Oliver put her hands to the banister and bent her over it, squeezing her ass firmly before he ripped her dress in two, letting the fabric fall to the floor. Immediately he started kissing down her spine roughly. His teeth moved over her sensitive skin, making her moan and groan.

He pushed his clothed hips against her naked ones, rubbing himself against the perfect curve of her ass. His hands moved to her front, stroking her bump. His lips traveled to the crook of her neck, sucking her skin into his mouth, leaving a mark.

“Oliver?” she moaned.

“Hm?”

“Boring!”

Chuckling, Oliver moved his hands off from her. She heard the promising sound of his belt being opened and his zipper being pulled down. She gripped the banister more tightly, wiggling her ass in anticipation.

She bit down on her bottom lip and moaned quietly when Oliver moved his hips again, his now naked erection moving between her wet folds a few times without entering her. Oliver grabbed her hips firmly, holding her in place, not letting her move. His lips caressed her shoulder and her back while he bit her soft skin from time to time.

Felicity leaned forward more. She tried to move her hips, but Oliver still kept them in a tight grip. So she just pressed her legs together, keeping his cock between her folds. The thick head bumped against her clit with each stroke, sending small jolts of pleasure through her.

“Oh God!” she screamed out when he suddenly entered her in one swift move, burying himself inside of her to the hilt.

“You’re enjoying this?” he asked like he had before.

Felicity shook her head. “Nope. Just surprised by the move. Oh, and could you… you know, hurry up. The sooner we get over with this, the better.”

She looked over her shoulder, winking at him challenging. Oliver licked his lips, leaned forward to press his chest against her back and put an arm around her front between her breasts and the bump, so when he pulled out of her and then snapped his hips forward, the bump didn’t hit against the banister, but only against his much softer forearm.

“Oliver, you are wasting our time,” Felicity said in a singsong as he pushed in and out of her slowly instead of hurrying up like she had asked him to. She had to grip the banister more tightly to even get herself to speak, but her voice sounded surprisingly strong given the nearing pleasure.

He lowered his head to her shoulder, turning his lips to her ear. “You’re sure that you’re not just being impatient about going to come again? Because I could swear that I am feeling your inner muscles clench around me already.”

He wasn’t wrong. She was clenching around him, being so close to the edge that all it would take to make her come was one particularly hard thrust. But Oliver kept his hips against hers firmly, swirling his hips without thrusting. Felicity whimpered quietly. She wanted to come. She wanted to come so badly.

“Say you’re enjoying this and I will let you come,” Oliver growled into her ear.

But Felicity shook her head. She wouldn’t let him win. Not yet. “Nope, not feeling any enjoyment here.”

Oliver pulled back and out.

“What?!” Felicity screeched, the emptiness between her thighs making her voice whiny. “Come back!”

“Why? You’re not enjoying this. So I will just take care of myself, and you can take care of yourself,” Oliver suggested, stroking his length that was milked with her juices.

Felicity whimpered. She knew that this could go on for hours. They would continue to tease each other. They would take each other to the edge over and over again without taking them over the edge. She would continue to claim that she wasn’t having fun and Oliver would continue to deny her what she wanted and needed.

“How about a compromise?” she asked with hoarse voice.

Oliver cocked his head. “I am listening.”

“I say that you are a great lover, the best there is out there, and you modify that to only being that good when it’s with me,” Felicity suggested. She was breathless, and neither the sight of naked, erect Oliver nor the fact that her body was still in the expectation of an orgasm, was helping her to catch her breath.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked, and she was almost prepared to be turned down, but Oliver stepped forward, his chest pressing against her breast. He was ignoring them during sex lately because they were too sensitive to be touched at all. The feeling of his naked skin against her nipples made her skin tingle once again now, though.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked back.

“You do know that sex is _only_ fun with you, right?”

“You do know that sex is _always_ fun with you, right?”

Their lips came crushing down onto each other’s fiercely. Oliver turned Felicity back into the old position, thrusting back in. Their lips stayed locked while Oliver snapped his hips into hers as fast as she had suggested before. Felicity didn’t hold back her moans any longer. She moaned into Oliver’s mouth, sucking his tongue into her mouth while he brought her closer to the edge.

When she felt the pleasure washing over her, she put her head back, letting Oliver’s lips travel down her neck. She stared at the ceiling, calling out for her personal sex God to not stop. Oliver chuckled against her skin and kept thrusting in and out of her lazily until she put her hand to the back of his head, pulling his lips back to hers, so she could kiss him.

When he slid out of her, still hard, she turned around, throwing herself at him. Oliver scooped her up into his arms and carried her upstairs to their bedroom where he laid her down onto the mattress and then crawled onto the bed behind her. Kissing down her neck, he let his hand move from her shoulder over her waist and hips down her thigh and to her knee, lifting it to spread her legs.

“Are you comfortable?” he whispered into her ear, rubbing his erection against her wet opening.

“A pillow for the bump would be nice,” Felicity replied, her words barely understandable due to the moan that escaped her lips. “Please.”

Oliver grabbed one of the pillows and put is under the side of her belly. Felicity’s content sigh answered the not asked question if she was better now. He pulled her leg back over his and slowly entered her again. Felicity turned her head, their lips locking immediately.

They made sweet, gentle love with one another. Oliver kept his thrusts slow, the kiss tender. The hand that still held her leg up, caressed her knee softly. Felicity moved against him as much as her bump allowed her to. She could feel her pleasure increasing, her orgasm nearing. She was surrounded by him. His warm chest pressed against her back. Their breaths mingled. She could smell him, taste him, and feel him deep inside of her.

When she squeezed his length with her inner muscles, Oliver growled into her mouth, making her chuckle quietly.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he growled.

The way he said her name increased her pleasure. She gasped and moved her hips against him faster, squeezing his length once more.

“If you want to come, you should stop doing this, or this will be over too soon.”

“Close already,” Felicity moaned, seeking out his lips again.

Oliver could feel her clenching around him. Her breaths were becoming shorter and her thrusts even faster. With two particularly hard thrusts, Felicity was falling apart in his arms. Her body was shaking involuntarily, an inaudible cry left her mouth. Oliver thrust into her three more times before he came with a grunt.

They caught their breaths only shortly before their lips locked again. Oliver let Felicity’s leg back to the mattress, grabbing another pillow to put it between her knees, making it more comfortable for her to lie. When he moved his hands over her bump, she entwined their fingers and pulled his hand to where he could feel Tommy kicking.

“I think you woke him,” she said with a smile once their lips parted.

“I could say I am sorry, but that would be a lie,” he answered, kissing the tip of her nose.

Felicity smiled. “This was nice.”

Oliver perked his eyebrows. “Just nice?”

“Great!” Felicity corrected herself hastily. “Amazing! Soul-melting! Life-changing!”

Oliver grinned contently. “And I thought I had to prove my skills to you once again.”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed. “Maybe after a short nap. The hormones are messing with my brain. I might forget about your godlike skills.”

“Don’t worry,” Oliver whispered into her ear, kissing the soft skin right under her earlobe. “I’ll remind you, right after we have rested.”

Felicity sighed and closed her eyes, enjoying the way Oliver had wrapped himself around her. She felt warm and comfortable like this. Both were rather rare things with the ongoing pregnancy.

“Oliver?” she murmured, already on the edge to falling asleep.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

They fell asleep like that, snuggled up to one another nakedly. They slept for two hours before Felicity awoke to Oliver’s lips trailing down her neck and Tommy’s feet kicking against her inside.

Could she feel any better?


	73. Life changing decisions

The first thing Oliver noticed when he directed the car into the street he lived in was Thea's car that was parked right in front of his house. His heart started racing immediately. He knew it was stupid because Thea came over to visit her favorite and only sister-in-law as well as her favorite and only niece – although one could probably argue that Sara Diggle felt as much as a niece to her as Emmy – often, and just because Felicity hadn't mentioned that Thea was coming over that didn't mean that anything had happened. Maybe she just wanted to talk about girls’ stuff, or she had been shopping and had decided to pay Felicity and Emmeline a short visit on her way back home. There were so many possibilities for why she was here and why Oliver hadn't known she was coming over, and none of those options included anyone being hurt or worse.

But no matter how many rational reasons Oliver could make out, the worry that had taken hold of his body immediately, stayed. With every beat of his heart he felt a stabbing pain in his chest, thinking that something might be wrong, and that Felicity had called Thea to make her feel better. The fear that Felicity's depression could have returned, and that he had to live through more months of helplessly watching her losing herself scared him. Whenever Felicity had articulated her worry about that, Oliver had comforted her and told her that everything was going to be okay, and that they were going to get through everything together. He had meant it then and it still believed in it now. He just hadn't been able to tell her how scared he had actually been that this could happen to her again. He had barely been able to admit it to himself up until now.

Oliver hurried to park the car in the garage, closed the gate and almost ran to the door. The doorhandle was already in his hand when he reminded himself that he should take a deep breath. Barging into the house would only scare Emmy. During the months that had passed since Felicity's prenatal depression had decreased, the toddler had started to become much more aware of what was happening around her. If he barged into the house like this, she would immediately feel that something was different. So he took some deep breaths until he felt his body relax more. Then he opened the door and stepped into his house, listening to the noises that were coming from the living room. He could hear the sounds of Emmy's favorite cartoon as well as low whispers of Thea and Felicity.

"Relax, Oliver," he told himself quietly and took another deep breath before he went over into the living room, forcing himself to only go slowly instead of running like a small voice in his head yelled he should do.

"Daddy!" Emmeline shouted as soon as he had put one foot into the room, and immediately jumped up on the seat surface of the couch and over the backrest right into his arms. Chuckling, he pressed her small body to his chest and pressed a few kisses to her head, all the while watching Felicity, eying her up to try and find out whether he needed to be worried or whether he should relax.

She was beautiful as always. She sat cross-legged on the couch, wearing sweatpants and one of his shirts that tightened over the baby bump that as Felicity claimed made her look like a whale although she still had two months of pregnancy ahead of her. Her blonde hair was tugged up into a messy bun. Several strands of her hair were falling out of it and into her face. She wore her glasses on the tip of her nose, studying something on her tablet while Speedy watched her, but with less worry and more excitement than her big brother. If the expression in his sister's face was any indication, Oliver assumed that Felicity was okay.

When Emmy struggled to get out of his hold, so she could turn her full attention back to her cartoon, he sat her back down on the couch, pressed a short kiss to Thea's cheek and sat down on the back rest of the couch right behind Felicity, one of his hands stroking over her hair, the other squeezing her shoulder.

"You okay?" he asked, trying to sound less worriedly and more interestedly, but could still hear the slight tremble in his own voice.

Smiling, Felicity straightened up and brushed her lips over his before she replied, "Now I am."

Oliver felt himself relax at the smile on her face. A relieved sigh escaped his lips when he bent down and pressed a kiss to the bump, whispering "Hi, baby" against it. Usually he would say, "Hi, Tommy" or "Hey, buddy" or anything like that, but Thea still didn't know that they were expecting a boy, and Felicity insisted on keeping it a secret until Thomas Robert Queen would be born in around eight weeks.

Eight weeks until their second baby could be born. Sometimes Oliver still had trouble believing it. A few years ago he had assumed that he would die alone, watching the love of his life building a family with someone else. A few years before that he had assumed that he would die on the island. But instead all of his dreams and even everything he hadn’t even been able to believe in his wildest dreams could happen, had come true.

"So what do you say?" Thea asked Felicity, completely ignoring his presence.

Felicity perked her lips, looked at her tablet once more and then leaned her head back, resting it against his thigh. Oliver leaned down and pressed his lips to the crown of her head which earned him a content sigh.

"I don't know," Felicity replied after a while, biting down on her bottom lip. "It could all be too much, you know?”

"But it would be great! You said so yourself! I mean it was actually your idea, even if it developed out of a joke," Thea answered. "You said he would be perfect for the job, and you were right. He is the best choice for it actually."

Oliver looked from his sister to his wife and back again. They didn't seem to bother that he was completely in the dark about what was going on here. They could basically talk about anything and anyone. Only the intense excitement in Thea's eyes and the obvious hesitation in Felicity's face made him think that they weren't talking about anyone and anything, but rather about someone and something important.

"Thea..." Felicity said carefully. "Our whole life would be changing. We would have to find someone who would take over QC."

"Well, you could do that," Thea answered while Oliver perked his eyebrows.

They were obviously talking about him, not with him, but about him while he was sitting right next to them, unable to do anything but listen.

"You might have forgotten, but I have children, very small and young children, considering our little one is not even born. I can't start to take over a multibillion dollar corporation only few weeks after the baby is born. Something like that needs to be well planned," she said, stroking her hands up and down her bump like she was reassuring Tommy that she wouldn't leave him even if he left her womb.

"You have money, hire a nanny."

"We can hardly give our children to just anyone, given what we are doing at night and no, that is no sexual allusion,” Felicity hurried to say before Thea could suggest anything like that because it had been obvious in her eyes that she wanted to. “Besides, I don't want my children to be raised by a stranger."

“Ollie and I were raised by Rasia who was kind of a stranger to our parents at that time,” Thea argued. “We loved her, and we turned out okay.”

“Really?” Felicity asked doubtingly. “The two of you are having second identities and run around in the city with masks, shooting arrows at people. I think every shrink would deny that you turned out okay. No offense.”

Thea shot Felicity a glare, but ignored her comment. Instead she said, "Fine, so I'll take the children."

"Nice try!" Oliver and Felicity said in chorus.

Felicity looked up at him surprised like she had just noticed that he was sitting there. His hands had begun to massage her shoulders, kneading out the tight knots under her skin. Since she kept staring at him without saying anything, he stated, "I don't know what the two of you are planning here, but I will certainly not allow Thea to take our children. If you want children, Speedy, have them yourself. Felicity and I put a lot of work into them, and we are not giving them up. You spent too much time with Emmy as it is already.”

Thea looked at her brother for a long moment before she smirked. Just when she wanted to say something Oliver probably didn’t want to hear since it would be about making babies with her boyfriend, he asked, “Does one of you care to bring a little light into what is happening here?"

Thea and Felicity exchanged a long gaze before Felicity handed him her tablet and pointed at the screen. Oliver lowered his gaze onto it and perked his eyebrows when he saw the article about Starling City's soon-to-be ex-mayor. Since Oliver had returned from the island, two mayors had been killed, and everyone else who had accepted the job had been abducted, attacked or made the city an even more criminal place. Yesterday the current mayor had announced that he was stepping down from his position after his wife had been abducted. Although Team Arrow had managed to bring her back healthy, Oliver knew what emotional consequences a situation like that caused. The memories of the time Felicity’s ex-stalker had abducted her, made his chest feel heavy. He squeezed Felicity's shoulder gently with the hand that wasn't holding the tablet, reassuring himself that his wife was here and safe. The article argued that Starling City needed someone to be brave for the citizens, someone who could defend himself and couldn't be threatened easily. This city needed a new kind of hope, "one that even The Arrow and his companions couldn't give" it said.

"What is that supposed to tell me?" Oliver asked with a sigh. "That I should hang up the hood? Gladly!"

A few years ago he had considered giving up the vigilantism. He had wanted to save the city, but what he had wanted even more was spending time with his wife and his children or child at that time. He had wanted a normal life, he still did. He would gladly give up his Arrow identity to be home every evening, so he could put Emmy and Tommy to bed and cuddle with his wife in front of the TV instead of coming home when everyone was asleep. Admittedly, with the number of masks in the city, he didn't have to be in the foundry every evening now. Still, he would love to be here every evening, every single one.

Unfortunately, Felicity didn't exactly allow him to give up The Arrow. According to her he had worked too much and given up too much to become the hero that he was now. If he stopped being Arrow now, he would have lost so much and only gotten back little of what he deserved. In addition to that she had said that with great power came great responsibility. He had the ability and the resources to help this city, so she had to use them.  
He knew that if he really wanted to do, Felicity would not force him to continue the vigilantism, but what was he supposed to do? He couldn't deny her anything.

Oliver had the slight suspicion that she thought he couldn't live without running over the roof tops of the city and chasing criminals. Maybe he couldn't. She was probably right. She usually was. Besides, Felicity knew him better than he knew himself.

"Of course you are not going to stop being The Arrow," Felicity responded, rolling her eyes just like he had assumed she would.

Sighing, he put the tablet next to his wife on the couch and looked at her. "Then what is this about, and why do we need to find somebody to take over QC because as far as I remember I am the CEO and I am doing a good job at that?"

Felicity already opened her lips to answer when Thea exclaimed, “You will run for mayor!”

He looked from Thea who looked at him with an ecstatic smile while she nodded her head fiercely to Felicity who bit down on her bottom lip again and looked at him guiltily.

“I don’t think that’s in the cards right now,” Oliver responded, “or ever.”

“But look how great it would be,” Thea said. “You could finally really do something in this city. You could make a change, and finally people would be thanking you for it. You would get the appreciation you deserve for the good you do.”

He didn’t need appreciation or thanks. The only thanks he needed was Felicity’s, and she did thank him in the best way possible. He loved when he returned home to her after a mission, a mission she had led from her home office since bringing Emmeline into the foundry had stopped working when she had started to climb every piece of furniture and developed an intense interest for arrows in the process. Felicity thanked him intimately without any clothes on her or his body and with lots of contact of skin to skin. That was the only appreciation she needed – the knowledge that Felicity appreciated him and thanked him for what he did was all he needed.

Oliver looked from Thea to Felicity once more. She had her gaze lowered to her knees, absentmindedly stroking the bump with both her hands. He could only anticipate from the stop of the movements every once in a while where Tommy was kicking her. He would love to reach out his hands and feel the kicks himself, but he kept looking from his sister to his wife and back.

“We are soon going to have two young children and I run Queen Consolidated and we still help this city at night. I think I am doing enough for it as it is and really? Me being a mayor? With all due respect to the trust you put in me, it is not going to happen,” Oliver told his sister firmly, the tone of his voice not allowing any objection.

“Thea?” Felicity asked after a short pause, “Would you mind putting Emmy to bed?”

Thea hesitated for a short second, but the expression in Felicity’s eyes seemed to be enough for her to realize that her sister-in-law needed a minute with her husband. So Thea got up from the couch, scooping Emmeline up in her arms.

“Ready for bedtime?” she asked the toddler.

“Noooo!” she yelled but laughed, and Thea carried her upstairs, negotiating with her how many bedtime stories she would have to read for her to fall asleep.

As soon as they heard the door to Emmeline’s bedroom closing, Felicity tugged at the lapels of Oliver’s jacket until he slid from the back of the couch down next to her. She crawled into his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck while he was making her press even closer to his body. One of his hands came to rest on the small of her back, massaging it gently since he knew that her back hurt cause of Tommy’s gaining weight. His other hand rested on top of her bump.

“I know that this is a big deal,” she said after a while, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “I wanted to talk to you about it alone first, but Thea was so excited about the idea, and it was actually hers, so I felt like she deserved to tell you about it.”

Oliver frowned. “Didn’t she just say that it was your idea?”

“I wasn’t serious when I suggested you should take the job,” Felicity replied honestly.

The fact that she immediately bit down on her bottom lip and lowered her gaze down to the knot of his tie told him that there was more about that.

“But?” he asked knowingly.

“But the more Thea and I have discussed it, the more I feel like she is right. You would be perfect for the job.”

Oliver frowned once more, shaking his head, but Felicity hastily interrupted him with a kiss. She moved her hands from his neck over his shoulders to his throat and loosened his tie. When she opened the first button of his dress shirt, she moved her hands under the fabric and over his naked shoulders beneath.

Oliver watched her closely. She still didn’t look at him, but he could see that she was thinking. She was thinking about how to tell him what she thought. So he gave her time, continuing to massage the small of her back and to rub comforting circles on the bump, feeling Tommy’s little feet kicking against his palm.

“I think you would be a great mayor,” Felicity stated after a while, lifting her gaze to look him in the eyes. “You are bolt, and you are good-hearted, and you want to make this city a better place no matter what. I think after all you are the best candidate for this job. And unless the former mayors you have been through that much of pain that-“

“That you feel I could take more when I am the mayor, and my family is constantly being threatened?” Oliver asked.

Felicity put a hand to his cheek and moved her palm over the stubble there. It took a short second, but then Oliver leaned into the touch and closed his eyes with a sigh. Felicity loved when he did that. He looked so relaxed then.

“What I meant to say is that you have been through enough pain to not back down as soon as the slightest thread appears,” she explained softly. “Oliver, you always wanted to make a change, and you always said that you wanted to give this city more than the Arrow could offer. So this is your chance. This is your chance and I think you should take it. Want to know why?”

Oliver nodded.

“Well, because I do know three things.”

“Three?” Oliver asked, a smile breaking on his lips. “Wow, when did you become that smart? We usually know two things.”

Felicity laughed, remembering the times they had told each other that they knew two things – the one time in the clock tower at the night of Slade’s attack, and shortly before he had left to fight Ra’s al Ghul. All of that seemed so far away. It probably was.   
But the memory of the words they had exchanged then was still present in her mind.

“I think after one-and-a-half children and almost three-and-a-half years of marriage it seems like we should set the bar higher,” she told him, and Oliver chuckled. She leaned her head down and pressed a short kiss to his lips.

“So what three things do you know?” he asked, looking at her with an adoration that although it was always there in his eyes when he looked at her still took her breath away.

“The first is that you are not alone. You have me, and we have Emmy and Tommy, and we have Thea and Roy and the Diggles and-“

“Got it,” he interrupted.

“The second is that I love you.”

“And the third?” he asked, the smile on his lips growing.

“I believe in you.”

Oliver hummed and framed her face with his hands, bending her head down, so he could kiss her. Their lips met in a gentle kiss, and when Oliver’s tongue opened her lips, Felicity sighed into his mouth, melting her body with his. They stayed like that for a while, holding each other. Oliver’s arms were wrapped around her tightly while their foreheads rested against each other’s.

“You really want me to do that?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded. “I think it would be something that you could really enjoy if you gave it a try.”

“What about QC?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, but Oliver hastily removed the skin from the maltreatment of her teeth, rubbing his thumb above the spot on her lip gently.

“When I was in New York with Ray,” she began and Oliver had to hold back a growl at the memory how Felicity had spent weeks apart from him although most of that time had been caused by Emmeline’s chickenpox and not by the trip with her ex-boyfriend, “I remembered how much I love spending my time on computers for more than checking out new recipes for children’s meals. I know I am still doing fun things for our night time job, but I’d like to do more, maybe even write a few programs again. And I know that being the CEO doesn’t mean doing the fun things, but I would really, really, really like to go back to Queen Consolidated. Even as CEO.”

Oliver nodded. He knew how much Felicity loved working on her computers and how much she enjoyed spending time writing difficult computer programs and hacking into data bases that were said to be unhackable, so she could write new programs that were better and that corrected the security gaps. He loved watching her during that work.

“But you don’t want a nanny,” Oliver said. “Neither do I by the way, but we cannot take two difficult jobs and still raise our children without any help, unless you want them to be raised in our offices.”

“Yes, we can raise them without help,” Felicity said firmly, “because I will hire a very talented and reliable vice president and-“

“The last time we had a partner at QC she took over the company in a weak moment.”

“Yes, but unlike you I will not sleep with the vice president and let that cloud my judgment,” Felicity replied with a tight smile, thinking about Isabel.

Oliver nodded slowly and kissed the juncture of her jaw and neck softly before he leaned back again and gestured for her to continue.

“And you and me, we will make sure that our appointments won’t mess too much, so we can still spend time with our children. We won’t need a nanny. We just need our friends and finding someone to watch Emmy has never been hard the last years. I am sure our friends will help out with Tommy, too.”

“I don’t want our children to be handed around every few hours which doesn’t mean that you cannot start working again,” Oliver said hastily when Felicity opened her mouth to protest. “If you want to lean back and rest at Queen Consolidated after doing the hardest job in the world for the past two-and-a-half years that will actually work perfectly with what I have in mind for my future. Because I would really love to take over your job, spend more time with our children and such things.”

Felicity frowned. “You feel like being a fulltime parent is more exhausting than leading a multibillion dollar company?”

“Hell yes!” Oliver said with a chuckle. “I mean what am I doing all day? I am sitting in my office, telling people what to do and signing all possible papers. And you? You are raising our children. You take care that they turn out to be just as perfect as you are and-“

Felicity interrupted him with a firm press of her lips to his.

“Thank you,” she said when she pulled away. “But really you shouldn’t underestimate the job you do. I think you are making very difficult decisions, too, and-“

“Are we spending our evening complementing each other now?” Oliver asked, cocking his head.

“I like complementing you.”

“I like complementing you,” Oliver answered, brushing her lips with his.

“Listen, Oliver.” Felicity leaned back a little, putting her hands to his shoulders. “I love you, and no matter how you decide, I will support you. If you want to be a stay-at-home-dad, I will take over QC to make this possible. I will cover your back, no matter what you decide to do. I just… I think you are a great guy, and you would be a great mayor, and actually those plans wouldn’t mess with your wish to spend more time with the kids. You wouldn’t have to travel that often, and I think if you become mayor the city might even change that much that you can reduce the time you spent out there as the Arrow, so… so could you please consider this idea? Just think about it. If you say that you don’t want to do it, I am fine with that. Just please consider it because I think you’d be great at that, and I think you could even find that changing the city like that is quite satisfying.”

Oliver nodded. “I’ll think about it.”

“That is all I am asking for,” Felicity replied with a smile and leaned forward to capture his lips with hers, but they were interrupted before their lips could meet.

“Your daddy is going to run for mayor!” Thea screeched, making both, Oliver and Felicity turn around to see Thea standing on the stairs, Emmeline sitting on her hip, clapping her tiny hands.

“He will just think about it,” Felicity modified that. “That doesn’t mean that he will do it.”

“Oh, of course that means he will do it,” Thea said excitedly. “What wifey says hubby does.”

Felicity only shook her head, slid off from Oliver and went over to the stairs to say goodnight to Emmeline since Thea explained that the toddler wouldn’t go to bed before she had said goodnight to her little sibling. Oliver watched how Emmy snuggled her head to her mother’s bump, whispering soft words to Tommy (or Nemo as she called him). Oliver knew that as soon as he and Felicity would go to bed, their daughter would climb out of her bed and cuddle with Felicity’s bump while he would snuggle up to Felicity’s back, so she and Tommy were sandwiched between him and Emmy. When Felicity needed to lie on the other side in the night, she would just say so, and Oliver would wrap his arms a little more tightly around his pregnant wife and their daughter and turn them by rolling onto his back, moving them above them and to their other side.

He watched his family, his everything. His wife, his daughter, his unborn son and his sister, and he immediately knew that Thea was right.

What wifey said, hubby did.

He was going to run for mayor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might be pleased to hear that I am planning ahead right now. I have planned every storyline up to chapter 92 although I can still decide to shift some of the chapters in case anyone got prompts. :)  
> Chapter 100 will be the lifechanger that puts those plans into reality... or at least part of them (so no angsty fic when we celebrate 100 chapters). There will be modifications in chapter 81 and 85. :)


	74. Tommy's guardian angels

“Oliver, we need to- Wow! The color is even better than I thought it would be,” Felicity interrupted herself when she stepped into what was soon going to be Tommy’s nursery.

They had really had problems with choosing a color for the walls. Blue was just too obvious. One look into the room and everybody would have known that they were having a boy. Besides, Felicity didn’t want a baby blue room because it was too stereotypical in her mind. Oliver had suggested a bright yellow, but Felicity had hated it, just like Emmeline. The toddler had suggested neon pink which hadn’t made Felicity and Oliver happy. And then finally they had found the perfect color. The lettering had said “fern green”, and that had been all that Felicity and Oliver had needed. Oliver had painted two of the walls in that color, the other two walls were beige.

“Glad you like it,” Oliver said, approaching her. He kissed her gently, careful not to touch her too much since part of his hands and his clothes were covered in paint, and he knew that she would kill him if he ruined her dress.

“Do you like it?” she asked.

“I love it,” Oliver answered, kissing her once more. “Where is Emmy?”

“Downstairs, cooking in her toy kitchen,” Felicity explained. “But she insists on doing the handprints today.”

“In that case we just need to decide where the bed should be placed. I think that would be a great place,” Oliver explained, pointing at a spot not far from the door, but far from the window.

Felicity knew how important safety was for Oliver. He was always worried that somehow at some point someone would find out that he was the Arrow, and that person would come here and hurt their children. He was having nightmares about it sometimes. When Emmy had been born, Oliver had barely been able to sleep at all. He had spent nights, sitting on her bed and watching her sleep, afraid that someone could come and take her away from them. He had started to relax at one point, and Felicity was sure that he was more relaxed now with Tommy, but she knew that he was worried, especially now that he was running for mayor.

Being Starling City’s mayor wasn’t exactly the safest job in the world.

So Felicity smiled. “I think that is a perfect place for the crib.”

They smiled at each other for a long time, not saying a word. Tommy’s birth was coming closer and closer. They were having their second baby, a baby whose birth they couldn’t await. They were just as eager to meet Thomas Robert Queen as they had been to meet Emmeline.

“I think you came here to talk to me about something,” Oliver said.

Felicity nodded. “Yes. We need to talk about Tommy’s godparents.”

“He doesn’t have any yet.”

“And that is exactly the problem.”

“So let’s talk about his godparents,” Oliver suggested and went past Felicity to their own room and into the joined bathroom. Felicity followed and sat down on the rim of the bathtub, watching how Oliver washed some of the paint from his forearms. The play of his muscles distracted her from what she had wanted to say. Oliver seemed to sense that because he grinned amusedly when he turned his head and glanced at her over his shoulder. “Did you want to say something, babe?”

Felicity bit her tongue and took a deep breath, reorganizing her thoughts and what she had planned on saying in the first place.

“We need to find godparents for Tommy,” she announced firmly, trying to not get distracted by the sight of Oliver’s now wet skin and the strong muscles underneath.

“So?” Oliver asked.

“Well, I have spent a lot time thinking about it. You know, when we picked Emmy’s godparents, I thought about who we have to choose for our next child, so nobody would feel offended or anything and- Oliver, why the hell are you undressing yourself?” she interrupted herself.

She watched Oliver taking off his shirt, uncovering his sweaty chest. The sight made her mouth go dry. Why did this man always have to look like a walking advertisement for sex? She could feel the effect his naked body had on her in the little pricking in her center. How could she still react to his naked chest like that? She had seen it endless times already, and she had touched it and licked it and-

“Felicity, I am sweaty, and the pain it sticking to my skin. I need a shower,” he answered, throwing his sweat and paint covered shirt into her face to make her snap out of all the good memories she had of his naked chest and her exploration of his skin.

“Maybe I should join you,” Felicity suggested.

She had to take a deep breath when Oliver took off his jeans and boxer briefs in one go. His naked length was only a few feet away from her. If she crossed the distanced and took it into her hand, she could hear the dark growl she loved so much coming from his lips. She could stroke her hand up and down his shaft before going down on her knees and-

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” Oliver said in a warning tone.

Only now she could see the effect her gaze had on him. His cock twitched slightly, and Oliver had to press his teeth together to not let the thought of what was going on in Felicity’s head into his thoughts.

“What did we say about sex in the shower?” Oliver asked her, standing nakedly in the middle of the room and looking at her.

“No sex in the shower until Tommy is born,” Felicity said. The tone of her voice was a mix of a sigh and an imitation of Oliver’s voice.

“Because?” he asked.

“Because sex in the shower is dangerous, and we don’t want Tommy to get hurt.”

While Oliver was entering the shower, Felicity watched him and reminded herself that only seven weeks were separating her from shower sex. She knew in the back of her mind that even though Tommy was going to be born in seven weeks, they weren’t going to be able to have sex right away. Health providers recommended waiting for four to six weeks. But Felicity chose to ignore that thought for now. She was eager to have sex, but given that she had almost fallen to the floor the last time they had had sex in the shower, she knew that Oliver would be able to resist her even if she went into the shower nakedly.

So she just watched him taking the shower for a while. The hot water was streaming down his skin, washing the sweat and paint away. Oh, yes, she would really love to join him, and to feel his naked, wet body pressed against hers. She wanted to feel him deep inside of her and-

“Tommy’s godparents,” Felicity said, taking in a deep breath.

“You said you have suggestions,” Oliver said from under the stream of water. “So? Who do you suggest should be Tommy’s guardian angels?”

“Guardian angels?” Felicity asked.

“Well, isn’t that a godparent’s duty?” Oliver asked, scrubbing some of the paint from his body. “Watching over the godchild?”

Felicity smiled and stroked her hands over the bump, imagining this. Guardian angels for her babies were a good thing. She wanted them to have guardian angels. Emmeline already had hers. Thea and John both were always there for Emmeline, protecting her of any harm, and Felicity was sure that whenever her little girl was going to feel like there was something that she couldn’t talk about to her parents, John and Thea would be there to listen to her and to advise her.

And she wanted the same for Tommy. She wanted to choose people who were there for him when he needed them.

“You know, when I was pregnant with Emmy, I immediately knew that I wanted Thea and John to be their godparents. Thea is the only blood family you have left, and she is like a sister to me. And John… well, let’s be honest, where were we without John?”

“Well, I know that I would be dead or alone with my head up in my ass,” Oliver said with a chuckle.

“I would be probably married to Ray.”

Oliver growled at that. “I am sure that I already said that this belongs to the things I don’t ever want to talk or even hear about.”

“No,” Felicity said with a slight smile at his jealousy even after more than three years of marriage, “you only said no talking about sex with Ray or kissing Ray although I can tell that he is a great kisser.”

“You are still not going to join me in the shower,” Oliver growled.

“Fine!” Felicity growled back, trying to cross her arms in front of her chest, but the bump was in the way, so she put her hands on top of it instead, her hands following the movements of their unborn son.

“Godparents,” Oliver reminded her of the actual topic after a while, turning off the water in the shower and grabbing his towel.

“Right,” Felicity said, turning her gaze away from the way Oliver was rubbing the towel over his naked skin, drying at least most parts of his body. “So… I always thought that we should kind of work through our list of friends with the godparents-thing. Since Thea and John are godparents already, Roy and Lyla could be left out at first. I actually thought Laurel and Barry should be the next ones because, well, it’s Laurel, and with Barry we would have our friends from Central City included.”

“I don’t think I would feel comfortable with making your ex-boyfriend godparent to out child.”

“We would make both of our exes godparents, Oliver,” Felicity answered with a frown.

“You’re friends with Laurel,” Oliver countered.

“You’re friends with Barry, too.”

Both of them looked at each other for a short while. Oliver had left the shower and was now standing in front of the sink. The towel was wrapped around his hips, and some remaining drops of water were running down his naked skin.

“What I was actually going to say,” Felicity said, trying to let the sight of Oliver not distract her again, “is that although I always imagined Laurel and Barry to be the godparents to our second baby, I think that Lyla helped me so much during the depression that she is already like a guardian angel to Tommy. So I’d really like her to be his godmother.”

Oliver watched her in the mirror for a short while. He knew that she still didn’t like talking about the time when she had suffered from her prenatal depression. He strolled over to where she sat on the rim of the bathtub, took her hands into his and made her get up. He put his strong arms around her waist, so her belly was pressed against his naked, wet chest. Sighing, she rested her head against his naked skin and closed her eyes. She loved being in her own warm Oliver-bubble.

“I’ve been thinking about Tommy’s godparents, too,” Oliver admitted, not loosening the grip he had on her. “And I think I want Captain Lance to be his godfather.”

Hesitatingly Felicity lifted her head from Oliver’s chest and looked at him doubtingly. She cocked her head before she asked, “Are you running a fever?”

Oliver huffed a laugh and kissed her forehead before he answered, “Lyla helped you through the depression, and Lance helped me when I didn’t know what was going on with you, and where that would take us. He helped me through it although he doesn’t trust me very much. I think it would be a great way to thank both of them, Lyla and Quentin, by making them Tommy’s godparents.”

“And what do we tell Laurel and Barry? I think in some way they are hoping to be the godparents. Besides, I actually like the idea to make Laurel Tommy’s godmother. I think maybe she needs the same kind of closure you got when we decided to call him Thomas.”

“I thought we just decided on Lyla and Lance?” Oliver asked.

“I don’t know,” Felicity whined, moving out of the hug and walking up and down in the bathroom while Oliver started getting dressed again. “You know, since we’ve decided on the date when we would start making a baby, I started planning every detail about our second baby. I thought about names and how we should furnish the baby room and which baby activities I should enter and – oh, did I tell you that the gym will finally start a baby yoga class? I always wanted to try that because, you know, I like yoga because it is great sports and even better is that those movements will totally sex up our… sex life… is it even possible to say something like that because it sounds wrong, but on the other hand yoga is so sexy that double sex should be-“

Oliver interrupted her with a long kiss to her lips. His arms slid around her waist again, hugging her close to his now fully clothed body. Felicity tried to hold back the pout when she saw the shirt that covered Oliver’s abs.

“You are getting off the track.”

“Right,” Felicity nodded, stroking her hands over Oliver’s shirt, feeling the firm muscles underneath. “What exactly were we talking about?”

“Tommy’s godparents.”

“Right!” Felicity exclaimed. “What are we going to tell Laurel and Barry why they aren’t going to be Tommy’s godparents? I think everyone expect us to make them godparents because it would be logical to choose the two of them.”

“Well, I don’t care what everyone expects from us,” Oliver explained, kissing first her right and then her left cheek. “I want Lyla and Lance to be the godparents and so do you. So they will be.”

“But I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“They won’t be hurt. Maybe a little disappointed, but-“

“That’s not making me feel better.”

Oliver laughed quietly and kissed the tip of her nose.

“We can tell them that they will be godparents to the next one.”

“We won’t have a next one.”

“You said that shortly before and shortly after Emmy’s birth, too. And during birth. And look at you now.”

“This time I mean it.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yes, I do.”

“No, you-“

“Can we return to the topic?”

Oliver grinned. Pressing another kiss to her forehead, he hummed quietly against her skin. Then he suggested, “We could tell them that we decided to not make our exes godparents to our children.”

“They will hate us.”

“So?”

“They won’t babysit anymore.”

“So?”

“So we will have them at home more often because we cannot find a babysitter, and that means that we won’t have the place all to ourselves that often which means that we cannot have sex orgies all over the house.”

“We have the godparents to watch them.”

“Yes, but Lance would watch them because he is kind of like their grandfather, and Lyla would babysit them because John is Emmy’s godfather, and Emmy won’t go anywhere without her little brother. The more people we have to watch them, the more sex we can have.”

“We tell them that and argue that if they help us have time for more sex, they help us creating their godchild.”

“We are not having another child, Oliver.”

“Hey, you are the one with the emotional conflict here. I am just trying to help you find a solution to that.”

“Well, this should be your conflict, too, because like I said, the more people hate us, the less will be willing to babysit which means the less time we will have to have passionate sex all over the house.”

Oliver hesitated shortly. Then he perked his lips and said, “I am still in for telling them that we don’t make exes godparents.”

“They will hate us if they even believe us.”

“Then we tell them I don’t want our exes to be godparents,” Oliver suggested. “They hate me, but still love you, and whenever you ask them to babysit, they agree.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “That sounds like a plan. And they will believe it because you are overly jealous and-“

“Mommy?” Emmeline asked, coming into the bathroom. “When do we make the handprints?”

“Now,” Oliver answered, and immediately Emmy ran into Tommy’s room.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have taken a shower before doing this,” Felicity said.

“I intend to take a bath after,” Oliver answered, leaning forward and brushing his lips against hers. “A bath you can join me in.”

“That sounds promising,” Felicity said with a smug smile.

“So we agree on Lyla and Lance?”

“Lyla and Lance,” Felicity said with a nod of her head, “but you explain that to Laurel and Barry.”

Oliver nodded and leaned down to kiss Felicity once more, but before he could do so, Emmeline ran back into the room, gripped his belt and tugged firmly, trying to drag him out of the room.

“No kissing! Painting!”

“Emmy, we don’t talk that cheekily,” Oliver scolded her mildly. “I don’t ever want to hear you talking that impolitely. If you want something, you ask for it and add a please to the sentence.”

“Or I am using my loud voice!”

Oliver glances at Felicity over his shoulder, letting his daughter guide him out of the bathroom nonetheless.

“Well, it works,” Felicity said with a cheeky smile that matched her daughter’s.

Thank God, they were having a boy, Oliver thought. He’d be lost with three women using their loud voices on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case anyone missed that piece of information on tumblr, we will have a little angst soon. It will be only a very, very, very short angst. It will start at the end of one fic and be resolved at the end of the one after that.   
> So if you see “Time for a story - Stupid dress”...  
> Oh, by the way, the depression won’t have anything to do with that angst. ;)


	75. The yin and the yang

“Why not?”

“Don’t want to.”

“Emmy, you and Camie are best friends.”

“Not anymore.”

“Why not?”

Emmeline didn’t answer. She kept playing with her laptop, ignoring her mother’s questions while Felicity was eying her daughter up, searching for a reason that could explain why the toddler didn’t want to see her best friend since ever anymore, and why they seemed to not even be best friends anymore.

Felicity had started wondering if anything had happened between the two-year-olds last week already. All of a sudden Emmy hadn’t talked about her friend anymore, and when Felicity had picked her daughter up from Camie’s place the day before the great silence had started, Emmy had pouted. At first Felicity hadn’t thought too much about it. Why should she have worried or anything? Emmeline and Camie had had arguments before, and they had never lasted long. But a full week of Emmy not talking about Camie and not wanting to see her seemed off for her daughter.

So Felicity did worry now.

“Emmy, what happened between you and Camie?” Felicity asked gently, sitting down on the floor next to her daughter. “You two are best friends.”

“Not anymore,” Emmeline just replied again, not looking at her mother.

Carefully Felicity took the laptop away from her daughter. Emmy made a grumpy face like her father did when he didn’t get to join his wife in the shower, and she reaching out for the laptop, but Felicity put it out of her reach and pulled Emmeline as much on her lap as possible with the bump in the way. Emmy wrapped her arms around the swollen belly, pressing her ear against it.

“Emmy, what is going on between you and Camie?”

“I don’t like her anymore,” Emmy simply replied.

Felicity stroked over her daughter’s hair comfortingly. “Why don’t you like her anymore?”

“Camie-“

“I’m home!”

Immediately Emmy got up and ran to her father, jumping up into his arms as soon as she saw him. She peppered his face with kisses that made Oliver laugh and press her more tightly to his chest. Felicity watched with a loving smile. Seeing Oliver with Emmy made her even more impatient about Tommy’s birth. She couldn’t wait to see him with their son.

“You’re home early,” Felicity said when Oliver entered the living room with Emmy snuggled up to his chest.

“I canceled an appointment,” he answered before winking at Emmy. “I thought someone would love some pool time.”

“Yes!” Emmy shouted excitedly, lifting her hands over her head before clapping them.

“You go upstairs and get your bathing suit ready. I’ll be there in a minute and help you put it on. Okay?”

“Yes!”

Oliver let Emmy to the floor, and she immediately ran upstairs. Emmy loved pool time, and in the middle of June it was now finally warm enough to get into the pool behind their house. She had been waiting for it all week. Felicity had the slight suspicion that the main reason for why Emmy was so eager to get in the pool was that pool time meant it was warm and summer, and Oliver had told her that her brother was finally coming when it was warm and summer. The only thing Emmy longed for more than swimming in the pool was her brother’s birth.

“Need help?” Oliver asked when Felicity didn’t get up from the floor.

“Yes, please,” she answered, letting Oliver crouch down behind her and hook his arms under hers to help her get up. In her 34th week of pregnancy and with the massive weight in front of her, moving really wasn’t easy anymore, and getting up from the floor on her own was nearly impossible.

“Thank you,” she said once she stood on her feet and turned around to wrap her arms around her husband. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he said, sliding his arms around her shoulders, and kissed her forehead. “Are you going to join Emmy and me in the pool?”

“Maybe later,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “First I gotta make a phone call.”

Oliver perked his eyebrow. “Lyla?”

“No,” Felicity answered softly, stroking her hand over his stubble. She knew that calling Lyla most likely meant that she would have a bad day and assumed that her depression was back, and she also knew that Oliver was just as scared of that as she was, only that he didn’t admit it because he thought that he had to be strong for her. “I gotta call Helen and ask what is going on with our daughters.”

“So Emmy is still not talking to Camie?”

“Nope,” Felicity answered and sighed. “So you get in the pool with her, and I’ll find out what is going on.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied with a smile and leaned down to kiss her, but before their lips could meet in a loving kiss, Emmy yelled for him upstairs.

“You better go before she comes down and drags you upstairs,” Felicity whispered against his lips.

Oliver nodded with a sigh and brushed his lips against hers shortly. “See you later.”

Felicity watched Oliver go upstairs. Emmy met him halfway up the stairs, scolding him for not coming right away because she had been waiting for him forever! And she hated when she had to wait for him. Her time was precious. Felicity grinned to herself, and waited until Oliver apologized – only half-heartedly as Emmy stated – before she grabbed the phone and dialed Helen’s number.

“Hello?”

“Helen?”

“Felicity, hi, haven’t heard of you in a while.”

Felicity wasn’t sure, but if she wasn’t completely wrong, Helen sounded almost nervous. Her voice was a little too high-pitched, and she talked just a little too quickly. The thought made Felicity frown.

“Yes, our girls seem to have a little argument,” Felicity answered lightly. “Toddlers’ drama.”

“Yes, about that…”

Okay, so Helen knew what was going on. Thank God! The guessing would have an end. But Helen didn’t continue, and Felicity had to stop herself from doing a triumphal fist-pump because the silence at the other end of the phone had to mean that whatever had upset the girls wasn’t Emmy’s fault. Again, thank God! Felicity really didn’t want to be the mother of the child who chased her friends away by being rude or anything.

She should have probably had more trust in her daughter. Emmy was a little angel around others. She was almost always an angel. Almost always.

“It’s a little bit embarrassing,” Helen said hesitatingly.

“Just tell me,” Felicity asked, trying to sound not too euphoric.

Helen sighed. “You know, I bought a magazine last week, and there was a long article about Oliver in it because now that he is running for mayor, the media is very interested in all the details of his life, so there were several photos of him. One was of the two of you vacationing. Some reporters must have caught you on the beach and taken a few photos that were published there. And all Oliver wore was swimming trunks.”

When Felicity saw a movement from the corner of her eyes, she smiled and stepped in front of her window, watching Emmy and Oliver get into the pool together. She leaned against the wall and watched them quietly, waiting for Helen to continue, but she didn’t.

“So?” Felicity asked.

Seeing photos of Oliver could hardly lead to a fight that would break best friends apart. Camie had been here several times, and she loved Oliver because he was tall and strong and could play with them wildly. There didn’t seem to be any obvious reason for why Camie should suddenly resent Emmeline because of Oliver.

“Well, Camie saw Oliver’s chest.”

Felicity frowned, staring out of the window to where Oliver and Emmy were having fun in the pool. She eyed up Oliver’s chest, the defined muscles of his shoulders and breast, the abs she had admired long before they had been together. It could be scary for little children to see him because with his tall, strong body Oliver could be frightening, but he always smiled at children. At least as long those children weren’t little boys that he thought were trying to flirt with his daughter.

There was no reason why a child should be scared when seeing Oliver half-nakedly. She herself always felt aroused. No matter how long they were together already and how often she had seen him not only half-naked but completely naked, she still felt her skin starting to prickle at the sight, anticipating how his skin would feel against hers. She loved exploring the muscles underneath the soft skin with her lips and tongue, biting down on his-

“The scars,” Felicity whispered more to herself than to Helen, but she heard nonetheless.

“It is really embarrassing. I talked to Camie about it as soon as I heard that she was comparing you and Oliver to _Beauty and the beast_ and saying that you cannot really love each other because you are a pretty princess and he is… a beast. Really, I am so, so sorry. It’s just that Camie has never seen anything like that, and-“

“It’s okay, Helen,” Felicity said hastily, hoping that she sounded convincing since she felt anger build in the deep of her heart. “She is a child, and she has never seen something like that. I just wanted to make sure that Emmy didn’t do anything to upset you or Camie.”

“No, it’s really-“ Helen started, but interrupted herself with a sigh. “Felicity, I am so sorry.”

Felicity still looked out of the window, her gaze now focused on Oliver. He seemed to sense that because he turned around and cocked his head, looking at her in question. She smiled hastily, trying to reassuring him that she was okay, but Oliver still looked worried. He gestured around, asking if he should come in, but she shook her head, and he frowned.

“Like I said, everything is alright,” Felicity said. It should be okay because Camie was a young child, but Felicity was angry nonetheless. “I gotta hang up now.”

“Yeah… Bye, Felicity, and once again I am so sorry.”

Felicity hung up hastily, not wanting to hear any other apology. It shouldn’t matter to her that a two-year-old offended Oliver for his scars. It really shouldn’t because children had their own weird logic, and they were children after all. But it still hurt her because as ridiculous as it sounded Felicity felt personally offended by the child’s statement.

Oliver’s scars were the permanent marks of his fights for life. They reminded him that he had survived dark times and that, if there should ever come more dark times, he could survive them, too. It had taken a lot of time until Oliver had felt comfortable with his scars because he himself had felt like they had made him a monster. Only Felicity had been able to convince him otherwise. And when Emmy had been born, he had again been afraid whether the little girl would be afraid of them. She hadn’t, not even for the shortest moment. When she had been a few months old, she had tried to eat them, but she had never been afraid of them.

And what was the comment about _Beauty and the beast_ meant to say? Belle and the beast ended up together because she had fallen in love with him as a whole. And the same had happened with her and Oliver. She had fallen in love with all of him, his character and his looks. God, that man was the hottest human being she had ever met.

Just because people seemed different, didn’t mean that they couldn’t love each other. The opposite was the case for her and Oliver.

His silence and her babble.  
His strength and her brain.  
His super-senses and her clumsiness.  
His baking and her cooking.  
And there was so much more. Oliver and she seemed opposite to one another, but they needed each other because they only worked together.

Felicity narrowed her eyes and hastily walked upstairs. She pulled her old casket, one she hadn’t even looked at for a long time because the things in there were more mementos than jewelries, out of the drawer of the dresser and took it to the bed where she spread out all the things in it on the mattress. Her hands moved over the things, her eyes searching for what she knew she needed right now.

When she found it, she hurried to get up from the bed and go back downstairs. Well, given the heavy weight in front of her, ‘hurried’ might be the wrong word.

Oliver and Emmy were still in the pool when she stepped outside in the garden. The anticipation of what she knew she was going to see made her smile even before she stepped around the pillar and saw the two of them floating in the water. Emmy had her arms wrapped around Oliver’s neck, her legs around his chest.

“No, we don’t eat ice cream for dinner,” Oliver told Emmy with a smile on his face while Emmy put on a pouting face.

“Actually,” Felicity said, stepping to the edge of the pool and sitting down there, her legs dangling in the water, “if Emmy wants ice cream for dinner tonight, she will get ice cream.”

Oliver perked his eyebrows. “She will?”

Felicity nodded. “Anything else you want, Emmy?”

“Movie night!” she exclaimed happily.

Again Felicity nodded. “We do a pajama party in the living room and watch movies all night.”

“Yeah!” Emmy said, clapping her hands, and swimming to her mother. She climbed out of the pool and into her mother’s lap, pressing her wet body against Felicity. “Thanks, momma.”

“You know, I got something for you,” Felicity said with a smile, stroking her daughter’s blonde locks with her hand gently. When she showed the toddler the necklace, Emmy looked at the talisman on the thin white gold chain with wide eyes, her fingertips brushing over it carefully.

“What’s that?” Emmy asked.

“This sign means that two things that are very different still can’t be without one another,” Felicity explained the meaning of the amulet in a simplified, child-orientated way. “It’s the yin and the yang.”

“For me?” Emmy asked.

Felicity nodded her head and put the necklace around her daughter’s neck, making the toddler smile. She kissed her mother on the cheek and jumped into the water again. Some water splashed at Felicity, making her chuckle.

“You okay?” Oliver asked, swimming between her legs and massaging her calves.

“I am perfect,” Felicity replied, leaning down and kissing him. “Did you know that we have a really smart, really caring, kind of perfect daughter?”

Oliver smiled. “Sure, I knew that from the first moment on. She is the perfect copy of her mother, a really smart, really caring, kind of perfect wife.”

“Well, I think it has more to do with her father’s genes. He is a really smart, really caring, kind of perfect guy,” Felicity replied.

Oliver put his hands to both sides of her body and propped himself up onto his hands, his strong arms lifting him out of the water until his face was on the same level as Felicity’s, and he could kiss her gently in thanks, whispering “I love you” against her lips.

“I’ll go lie down on the Bali bed,” Felicity said, stroking her hand over the swell of her stomach. “Tommy doesn’t make it easy to sit on the floor right now or anywhere else for that matter.”

“Need help getting up?” Oliver asked.

“No, I think I’ve got it,” Felicity replied, inconveniently pulling her legs out of the water, getting on her knees and then finally on her feet. “Wow, I can still get up on my own. So proud of myself.”

Oliver chuckled, but was smart enough to not say anything. Instead he turned around and stared playing with Emmy. Felicity meanwhile lay down on the Bali bed and closed her eyes, letting the sun prickle on her skin. Her hands followed Tommy’s movements.

She still felt the slight feeling of anger in the pit of her stomach. Even a child shouldn’t be allowed to say such things. She knew that Helen had scolded her daughter for what she had said, but Felicity didn’t understand why Camie had said in the first place. Yes, she was a child, but shouldn’t children know about scars and that they didn’t make you a monster, too? Emmy knew. But of course she had Oliver right in front of her. She knew scars since she could see. But-

Her thoughts came to a sudden stop when she felt a pair of lips brushing against hers, the tip of a tongue opening them. Sighing, she smiled into the kiss. Something about the fact that Oliver was kissing her upside down was making it different, but it was just as great as always. When their lips parted, Oliver pressed short kisses to the tip of her nose, her forehead, both of her cheeks and finally once again to her lips.

“Whatever is bothering you, forget about it. It will only ruin this beautiful day for you,” he whispered against her lips. “And whatever it is, I am sure it is not worth any of your time.”

Felicity smiled happily.

This was exactly what she had meant. Oliver and she, they balanced each other. She was often unforgiving. Unlike Oliver. Sometimes it was the other way around, but they always balanced each other. That was how their marriage worked.

“What are you thinking about?” Oliver asked.

Felicity’s smile grew as she answered, “The yin and the yang.”


	76. Criminal ambitions?

“Hi, mommy!” Emmy yelled when she came running into the living room, stopping next to her mother to press a kiss to the swell of her stomach and murmur, “Hi, baby.”

Before Felicity could do as much as stroke over her daughter’s hair, the toddler ran upstairs, probably because she wanted to draw another picture for the nursery. There were already ten framed pictures she had drawn for her little baby brother, but Emmy insisted that those still weren’t enough. There needed to be a drawing of the Arrow and his friends because since Emmy had seen the news a few days ago and had heard of the city’s personal hero, she was obsessed with him.

Felicity watched her daughter disappear on the stairs and smiled softly to herself. The fact that her little girl was obsessed with her father’s secret identity made Felicity unbelievably proud and Oliver very happy.

When Oliver came stepping into the door, the expression in his face unreadable and the posture of his body showing tiredness and exhaustion, Felicity frowned. When Emmy and he had left an hour ago to go to the supermarket, he hadn’t looked like that. It was untypical for Oliver to be exhausted by a little trip to the supermarket, even when he had had a hard night. When let himself fall to the sofa next to her, Felicity put the tablet away and frowned at him even more.

“Hi, babe,” he sighed, pressing a short kiss to her lips and letting his head sink down onto the bump, kissing it. “Hey, Tommy.”

Tommy kicked against his father’s lips. It made Oliver smile tiredly before he snuggled the side of his face to the bump and closed his eyes with a sigh. Felicity didn’t say anything. She just stroked her hand over his hair and watched him closely. Although he looked tired and exhausted and a lot of other things that should worry her maybe, she enjoyed seeing him that much at peace. Although they were together for so long, sometimes she was still surprised how much he could relax in their home.

“Felicity?” he asked after a while. It sounded a lot like a sigh, and Oliver didn’t even open his eyes.

“Hm?” she hummed, continuing to stroke the tip of her fingers of her left hand through his hair while starting to move her right hand up and down his arm.

“I think we created an evil genius when we made Emmy.”

Felicity chuckled lowly. Emmy was creative, picked up on things pretty fast and was probably a little too clever by half. It was sweet most of the time, but sometimes there were moments when that could be pretty embarrassing. Like when Oliver was talking to a female friend – a real friend, nothing more – and said friend introduced herself to Emmy, she would cross her arms in front of her chest and introduce herself as “Emmeline Harper Queen, her parents pride and joy and the result of their unbreakable love”. Felicity was sure that Thea or someone had told her that because as smart as her almost two-and-a-half year old was, she didn’t usually say those sentences, especially not that long ones.

“Don’t laugh,” Oliver groaned, snuggling his cheek a little more firmly to the bump. “Our child has criminal ambitions.”

“What did she do?” Felicity asked with a snort. “Did she try to save the fishes by taking them from the ice and throwing them in the fountain again?”

Emmeline had done that once when Felicity had taken her shopping. The toddler had seen the dead, fresh fishes on the ice, and she had taken them and put them to the fountain to save their lives. Felicity had hastily grabbed the most important things, had paid them and all the fishes Emmy had ruined and hurried home. Since then they were going to a different supermarket.

“No, she abducted a child.”

The stroking movements of her hands stopped, and she looked at him with wide eyes, asking, “Explain that sentence.”

Oliver sighed, still not lifting his head or opening his eyes.

 

 

“Emmy, don’t run too-“

Sighing, Oliver watched his daughter running into the supermarket and disappearing out of his sight. Felicity and he could tell her to not run away too far as often as they wanted, Emmy just refused to listen. She was smart, and Oliver was mostly sure that she wouldn’t get into a stranger’s car, but whenever she was out of his sight, there was the danger of her getting abducted or anything like that.

Oliver hurried to get a cart and followed his daughter into the supermarket. Shopping with Emmy was always much more exhausting than when he did it on his own. But Emmy loved going shopping. She liked to get the things Oliver asked her to get and the things she wanted, and she loved even more when she was allowed to pay by using his ATM card.

As soon as he stepped into the supermarket, he looked out for Emmeline and was alerted when he didn’t find her immediately. There was only one entrance, so it was impossible that someone had taken her. But there were the back entrance for the staff and the entrance through storing place. If someone had-

“Daddy, hurry up!”

Sighing, Oliver shook his head to get those thoughts out of his mind. He was always worried that someday someone was going to come along and try to take her from him. He had been a fool to think that it would ever get easier. It got harder with every day. Oliver had no idea how all of this was going to be when Tommy would be born in like five weeks. Five weeks, Oliver repeated to himself quietly. Five weeks and he would have two little children to worry about.

When Emmeline called for him again, Oliver hurried to get to her. He didn’t miss the gazes of the ladies around him. They were all staring at him, smiling more or less shyly and flirting more or less clearly with him. Oliver was mostly used to this. When he had first shown up at the supermarket years ago, he had noticed those gazes, and when he had taken Baby Emmy with him, it had only called more attention. There had actually been young women coming to him and talking to him, and Oliver remembered thinking that those were nice women who loved to see babies. It had taken him like forever and the hint of a very happily, not flirting woman to realize that all the women who had come to him to learn more about Emmeline had been flirting with him. He had been so deep in his happy bubble with Emmeline and Felicity that he hadn’t even realized it.

Anyway, since he was running for mayor, those women’s gazes had intensified. The expression in their eyes had become more sensually. Oliver felt uncomfortable with them staring at him like that. In every interview he had always stressed how much he loved his family, how Felicity and Emmeline and their unborn baby were the motivation for why he wanted to make this city a better and safer place. It was true. They were the reason why he was running for mayor. But he had also told that to get rid of the women who seemed to think that just because Felicity was not right at his side all of the time he was fair game.

When Oliver stepped into the corridor with the products for babies, he found Emmeline standing in front of the shelf with stuffed animals, eying up every single one with a censorious expression in her eyes. Oliver smiled at the sight. He knew exactly what was coming now.

“What’s wrong, Emmy?”

“Nemo needs a toy.”

Nemo was Emmy’s favorite Disney character, so she had decided to name her brother after him. Oliver and Felicity had decided against telling her Emmeline her brother’s actual name yet. She knew that she was having a brother, and she was keeping quiet about it, but telling her the name would probably start an endless discussion about why he wasn’t named Nemo, and then everybody would know that they were having a boy. Oliver wouldn’t mind, but Felicity would, so they were keeping quiet about it.

“The baby already has a lot of toys at home in the nursery,” Oliver replied, leaning forward and propping himself up with his forearms on the cart. “Do you think he needs another one?”

Emmeline nodded fiercely, answering, “Babies can’t have enough toys.”

Oliver smiled. If his daughter wanted to spoil her little brother, he would be the last person to deny her that. “How about you pick a toy that we are going to buy for your little sibling while I will go and get all the things mommy wrote down on the list?”

“Yeah,” Emmy said with a nod, her eyes still focused on the shelf in front of her.

Oliver stepped away from the cart and crouched down on the floor. “Emmy?”

The toddler turned around and approached him. She came to stand in front of him, her little hands resting on his knees. She looked at him with her big, blue eyes, waiting for him to say something.

“When daddy goes looking for the stuff mommy needs, and a stranger comes here and asks you if he should buy you sweets, what do you do?”

Emmy pressed her lips tightly together and thought about the question. Oliver prayed that her answer wasn’t going to be a special kind of candy she had chosen to let the stranger buy.

“I say ‘no’ and start yelling.”

“What if the stranger says he has a little puppy in the back of his car?”

“I say ‘no’ and start yelling.”

“What if the stranger says he knows mommy and daddy and he says that we want you to go with him?”

“I say ‘no’ and start yelling.”

“What if the stranger is a woman?”

“No different.”

“What if he stranger has another kid with him or her?”

“No different.”

“What if daddy says he wants a kiss?”

Giggling, Emmeline stepped forward and straightened up onto her tiptoes, so she could press her lips against her father’s, kissing him gently.

“Good girl,” Oliver said, pressing a short kiss to Emmy’s head when he straightened up, and only waited until she was completely focused on the toys before he turned around and started to work through the list Felicity had given him.

Oliver didn’t know why, but he loved doing the weekend shopping. Or maybe he did know. Shopping was so heavenly normal. It was something every human being had to do every now and then. When he had been a child, he had always accompanied Rasia to the supermarket, and he had loved doing the shopping with her. And now he was trying to give his daughter the same good time when in a supermarket.

He strolled through the supermarket, putting things in the cart and turning to see if Emmy as still there every now and then. A few women tried to start a conversation with him every now and then, but he gave them a polite brush-off by telling them that Felicity, his very pregnant wife was waiting for him at home, probably starving to death since her appetite had increased extremely those last days. Even when she was sleeping, she had something to eat on her nightstand for her nightly snacks. He would wake up in the middle of the night and find her sitting next to him in bed, eating. Of course Oliver didn’t tell the foreign women that.

While Oliver was leaning into the freezer to try and find mint chocolate chip ice cream under all the boxes with other flavors, he heard Emmy say, “Daddy, look, I found Nemo.”

Oliver grabbed the last box of Felicity’s favorite ice cream flavor and straightened up to look at the Nemo toy Emmeline had seemed to find. When his eyes focused on his daughter, though, she wasn’t holding a stuffed clownfish in her hands. Instead she was pushing a stroller in front of her, a sleeping baby with a blanket full of different Nemo images on the fabric in it.

“Emmy, what-?” Oliver started to ask, letting the box with ice cream fall back into the freezer. “Emmy, what- what did you- do?!”

Emmy frowned like his question didn’t make any sense. “Baby comes when it’s warm. It is warm. That is my baby.”

He had known that it had been a bad idea to tell Emmeline that she was having a little sibling when it got warmer. He had needed to find a way to tell her a span of time that a two-year-old could understand. Besides, he had hoped that she would just forget about it, but those last weeks she had stated over and over again that it was warm now, and had asked where the baby was that she had been promised.

“Emmy, where did you-“

“My baby! Where is my baby?!”

As soon as Oliver heard the panicked scream, he lifted Emmeline into his arms and turned the stroller to run towards where the voice had come from. When he stepped into the corridor with the baby toys where he had left Emmy a few minutes ago, he immediately saw the dark haired woman who had tears streaming down her face and whose legs were shaking. Another woman was holding her up on her feet. When she saw the stroller, she let out a terrible sob and ran towards her sleeping child, sinking down onto her knees in front of it.

“I am so sorry,” Oliver hurried to say while the woman was crying. “I am so, so sorry. I let my daughter out of my sight, and she is addicted to babies because she knows she is getting a little sibling soon, and we told her the baby is coming when it is warm and- I am so, so sorry. I should have kept a better eye on her.”

He did notice that he sounded a lot like Felicity the way he talked quickly with the words coming out of his mouth uncontrollably. What else was he supposed to do or say? Emmy was still frowning at him, obviously not getting what was going on, the baby’s mother was still crying although her sobs were becoming lower now. People around them were staring and whispering.

Yup, that was going to be a great headline for the news tomorrow, he thought, but didn’t really care about the news anyway.

“I am so sorry,” he repeated again.

The mother lifted her gaze from her baby and looked up at him. For a moment he thought that she was going to yell at him which he would definitely get because if someone would take his children away from him – little toddler or not – he would be mad as hell.

“You’re- you’re Oliver Queen, right?” the mother asked.

Oliver nodded.

“I am going to vote for you,” she explained, wiping her tears out of her face and getting up from the floor.

“Not anymore, I guess.”

The woman smiled at him, fluttering her eyelashes at him.

Wow, Oliver thought, really? His daughter had just abducted her child, and she still wanted to flirt with him? What was wrong with some people?

“Again, I am really sorry,” Oliver said, smiling tightly. If being candidate in the run for mayor and being kind of good-looking was helping in this situation, he was going to use it shamelessly. Both things were getting him in trouble more often than not, so he could definitely use them this time to solve a problem. “Emmy is just so excited.”

“Nothing happened and, well, she is kid, a really sweet one actually. I guess she inherited her father’s good look, hm?”

Oliver’s smile got even tighter before he hurried to say, “I think we should leave now… Her mother is waiting for us at home… Again, I am so sorry.”

Before she could say anything else, he almost ran away with Emmy on his arms. He knew that the cart was still at the freezers, but his embarrassment was too big to go back and get the shopping finished. He felt the eyes of people following him. Even more people turned their heads in his direction when Emmy shouted, “You forgot Nemo!”

“Emmeline, that baby wasn’t ours.”

“Yes, it was! Go back!”

“No, Emmy, that wasn’t our baby.”

“I want to keep him! Go back! Go back!”

She was squirming in his arms, trying to get on the floor, probably so she could run back to the baby she had tried to kidnap. When Oliver held her only more firmly to his chest, she started crying. Oliver would roll his eyes if people weren’t still staring at him. So he just smiled tightly and hurried to get to the car where he sat Emmy into her seat and hastily drove away. The toddler was still crying, screaming at him that they needed to go back because she had found Nemo and now she wanted to keep him.

Only when they were several blocks away from the supermarket, he pulled over and let the car stop. Taking a deep breath, he turned his head to look at Emmeline. She was sitting in her seat, still crying. The sobs were not as loud as before, though, and she looked at him poutedly. Oliver knew exactly where her behavior was coming from. All night she had kept making trouble. Whenever he had put her to bed, she had climbed out and tried to arrange things in the nursery. She had been awake until five a.m., had slept two hours and then declared that she was awake and didn’t want to sleep any longer. Emmy was tired and that was why she was crying and screaming and pouting now.

“Emmy, you cannot steal other people’s babies.”

“He’s my baby!” Emmy insisted.

“Sweetie, what did mommy and I tell you? Where is the baby?” When Emmeline didn’t answer, he sighed. “Where was the baby when we left to go shopping?”

“In mommy’s tummy.”

“And that is where the baby still is,” Oliver said. “When the baby comes, mommy and I will tell you, okay? But it will still take some time.”

Emmy still pouted.

“Honey, you can’t just steal a baby.”

“But-“

“No, Emmy,” Oliver interrupted her sharply. “You cannot do that.”

Emmy made a grumpy face for a short time. Then she shrugged her shoulders and started playing with the seat belt. Oliver knew that that was as much as he would get, so he turned around and started the engine again, heading home.

 

 

Felicity’s hands had stopped stroking over Oliver’s hair sometime during the story. None of them said anything for a long time. Oliver still didn’t believe what had happened, and Felicity was trying to get it into her head.

“Emmy stole a baby?”

“Yup.”

“She stole a baby?”

“That is what you asked before. Same answer – yup.”

“Oh my god,” Felicity chocked out. “Our child is evil. You know, how parents warn their children to not get too close to certain children because they might turn them into criminals? Emmy is a child like that. Emmy is the child parents warn their children of.”

“Oh yes, and we don’t have to warn her to get abducted because if a child goes missing in the supermarket, then because she has kidnapped it.”

“Oh my god,” Felicity repeated.

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“We need to talk to her,” Felicity said firmly.

“I tried. She didn’t care too much.”

“I will talk to her.”

“I think your loud voice would be too much of a punishment.”

“Oliver, she stole a baby!”

“She is excited to meet her little brother. We can’t blame her.”

“I blame her.”

“You are a bad mother.”

“Shut up!”

Oliver chuckled, pressed a kiss to Felicity’s bump, and straightened up. When she saw her smiling gently at him, he leaned over and kissed her lips gently. Then he got up with a tired smile and stretched his sore muscles.

“And now?” Felicity asked.

“No I will make a wait-for-the-baby-calendar,” Oliver said with a sigh. “You know… just like an Advent calendar just that we don’t count down the days to Christmas but those to Tommy’s birth.”

“I don’t think we should reward her with sweets for what she has done.”

“We don’t. Seeing how many more days there will be before he is born will be punishment enough.”

“What if he is a day late?”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Oliver chuckled. “I add a full extra week to it. And now I am going shopping. Again. And alone.”

Felicity chuckled, watching him leave. Emmy had definitely inherited her father’s impatience. But telling him that would probably do no good.


	77. Stupid dress

Oliver looked around nervously, eying up the room and the many people in it, all the while nodding politely at the man in front of him who was talking about his problem with the neighbor’s dog and how Oliver would hopefully take care of that once he would have become mayor. Oliver was barely listening, though. To be in a room with so many people made him restless because there were just too many possible dangers.

He hadn’t felt like this in a long time. Oliver couldn’t remember when exactly had been the last time he had been that nervous because he was surrounded by other people, but it felt like years ago. He felt his thumb rubbing against the tips of the other fingers on own accord, and he couldn’t stop the movement even when he tried. To run for mayor, a terribly dangerous position in Starling City, was not exactly something that helped him relax.

What did he normally do when he felt like this, Oliver wondered. Still nodding to whatever he was told, Oliver thought back to other times when he had felt like this. What had he done when had felt nervous? He remembered that alcohol had only made it worse. Spending all his time observing the room and the people in it hadn’t allowed him to have even one single talk which was why people had thought he was impolite. None of it had helped, but something must have relaxed him, he thought just when his thumb brushed the wedding band on his left hand, and immediately Oliver knew the answer to the question.

Felicity. She was who had always made him relax. Whenever he had felt nervous or restless, he had looked at her, and he had felt his heartbeat slowing down and the worries slowly vanishing from his mind and soul. And then she had looked back at him, and she had smiled comfortingly because of course she had known what was bothering her, and no matter if he had or hadn’t smiled back, Felicity had approached him and had taken his hand and kissed him gently.

So Oliver took another look around, trying to find Felicity in the crowd of people. When he had left for this terribly boring gala that according to Thea should help him to become mayor, Felicity had still been stuck in front of the mirror because Thea had made it her duty to make sure that Felicity looked exactly like a future first lady of Starling City should. And since Thea was a perfectionist in that, she had spent a lot of time to make Felicity look like she wanted her to look. Thea had promised Oliver and Felicity that it would only take a few more minutes, and that Oliver should just go without them, but now he was here for more than half an hour and hadn’t seen either of them.

“Mr. Queen?”

Only now did Oliver realize that he had stopped nodding and hence stopped pretending to listen to what the man in front of him had told him.

“I am so sorry,” he said hastily, putting on a fake smile he controlled to perfection by now. “I am a little distracted by worries right now. I haven’t seen my wife yet and given that she is very pregnant, I am always worried that something has happened or that the water has broken or something. Would you please excuse me? I think I need to make sure that she is okay.”

Oliver hurried away before the man whose name he just couldn’t remember because there had been too many new names for him to learn lately had had the chance to say anything else. He smiled at people who said his name, trying to start a conversation with him, but he gestured to signalize them that he didn’t have time right now. He tried to find Felicity between all the other people, but it seemed useless because the room was just too vast, and there were too many people in here, most of them probably taller than Felicity. He could hope that she was wearing the necklace she had given him for their last wedding anniversary because there was a tracker on it, and he could easily check where she was from her phone, at least if she wore the necklace, but she did most of the time, so chances were high.

How else was he supposed to find her?

He was already thinking about doing just that or just going on the stage and giving the speech he had prepared for later this evening now because at least from the stage he had the chance to see her despite her small height, but then his eyes found Laurel. She stood together with two people he knew were judges. When she looked at him in question, Oliver lifted his left hand, pointing at the ring and looking around. Immediately Laurel pointed at somewhere behind him, and Oliver nodded in thanks.

Continuing to walk through the room and find his beloved wife, his gaze moved over a bunch of more or less familiar faces. Until his eyes finally found her. Although she was the by far smallest in the group of people – Thea, Roy, John and Lyla – she stood in, he found her immediately. She was as beautiful as ever. Her hair was up in a wavy bun style, exposing her long neck. Her lips were painted in the same deeply red color as her floor-length chiffon dress he knew she had bought just for this day in an online store.

Oliver felt himself relax for a short moment. When Felicity was there, he was always so much calmer than without her. He knew that when she was there, he didn’t have to fear any horrible memories from his past because she was his shield, fending off everything bad that could haunt him. Looking back, Oliver had no idea how he had ever been able to live without her.

His worries made a quick reappearance when he realized that John had his arm put around her tightly, and Felicity was almost leaning into his side like she was unable to stand on her own feet. If it had been any other man, he would have been jealous. Since it was John, though, he was worried instead. Frowning, he approached them. He was like five feet away when Lyla nodded in his direction and Roy’s, Thea’s, John’s and Felicity’s heads snapped into his direction, looking at him.

“There you are. I was just going to look for you,” Felicity whispered, reaching out her arms for Oliver and letting herself fall against his chest when he was close enough. Immediately his arms wrapped around her tightly, and he held her to him, almost carrying all her weight. He looked down at her worriedly.

“You okay?” he asked, and she tried to pull slightly away, so she could get a better look at him, but Oliver only held her more closely to him.

“Yeah, I am fine. Great even. Especially because you are wearing tuxes and-“

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” Oliver said in a warning tone, and immediately she shut up and her hands stopped their travel under his suit jacket were they were stroking up and down his chest, following the tuxes. “The truth please.”

Felicity sighed and put her head back, looking at him and scrunching her nose. He knew it was the kind of face she made when she was about to say something she didn’t want to say because she felt stupid or whatever for saying it, but Oliver loved that expression on her face. It was cute.

“I am wearing high heels, but I cannot walk in high heels because I am so very pregnant and my feet hurt even without the high heels, so the high heels make it even worse because now all my weight is pressing down on the balls of my feet because, you know, I am wearing high heels which means that my heels are high off the floor and the high heels-“

“I just understand ‘high heels’,” Oliver interrupted her babbling with a slight frown. The way she leaned against him, made it seem like she had shrunk because her height right now was her no-high-heel-high. She was usually taller with her high heels. “Why are you wearing them anyway? You gave up on wearing them as soon as your bump started showing. Why even trying to wear them now?”

Felicity gave him an angry look that made Roy and Thea hastily leave to the bar and Lyla and John walk to the dance floor. Oliver pressed his lips together. If they were alone, he was sure that Felicity would talk to him in her loud voice, and when she opened her mouth, he was already sure that she would use her loud voice on him, but then she hastily looked around like she was reminding herself on where they were, and she closed her mouth to take a deep breath.

“The dress is too long,” she said, her voice tense. “And because of the stupid, long dress I have to wear high heels to not make it look like I shrunk out of my clothes, and to not risk to trip and fall.”

“I thought you tried the dress on last week.”

Felicity cocked her head, perking her eyebrows, and it took Oliver only a second to know why she was giving him that look because he suddenly remembered what had been the reason she hadn’t tried that dress on before. Felicity had wanted to make a big deal about the dress, not wanting him to see it, but of course her desire to keep it a secret had only made him nosier. So of course he had snuck upstairs when she has said that she was going to try on the dress. And he had found her in front of the mirror, holding the dress to her without wearing it and Oliver had… reacted to the thought of how she would look like when she actually wore it.

Oliver cleared his throat. “Why didn’t you just choose another dress?”

Felicity’s eyebrows perked a little more. “Oliver, look down my body and tell me how I am supposed to fit into one of my normal seized formal dresses that are in my closet?”

“Okay, you might have a point in this,” Oliver admitted with a nod and stroked his hand over her bump caringly.

Four weeks were separating them from the birth of their son. Oliver and Felicity just couldn’t wait to finally meet him. It felt like the pregnancy had been so much longer than the first one with Emmy. Of course he knew that that was nonsense, but it felt like this. He wanted Tommy to be in his arms as soon as possible, so he could kiss his wrinkly face and breathe in the delicate scent that only newborns had. He had been so nervous about Emmy’s arrival that sometimes he had panicked when he had thought that she would soon be born. Now he knew that he could be a dad, and he could be a pretty great dad actually, so he couldn’t wait to have one more child to take care of.

The only one who was more impatient for Tommy’s birth than Felicity – she just didn’t want to be pregnant any longer – and him was Emmy. Since she had abducted that baby in the supermarket, she basically annoyed them about wanting her baby brother to be born on a daily basis. Last night she had crawled into her parents’ bed to snuggle her face to the bump and talk Tommy into coming out of there right now because it had to be boring in there all alone. When that hadn’t worked, she had started to press Felicity’s popped out belly button like it was a button to start the birth. And then she had asked Oliver if they couldn’t just send mommy to the dentist, so he could pull Tommy out through Felicity’s mouth because in her world the only way Tommy had gotten into Felicity’s stomach was because she had eaten something that had made him grow.  
Oliver still had no idea how a not even two-and-a-half year old could be that… creative with logic. That just had to be Felicity’s genes.

When Oliver looked back up to Felicity’s face, it was still unchanged, so he hastily smiled and cleared his throat.

“You look beautiful,” he said in his best charming tone.

Instead of smiling back at him, her eyes narrowed. He knew he needed a different tactic.

“How about a dance?” he asked.

“Oliver, my feet hurt that much that I can barely stand on them,” Felicity replied, and he could see how she tried her best to fight the smile that threatened to spread on her face because she knew exactly that the only way Oliver had asked her to dance was because he had known that she would say no. Besides, she knew exactly that Oliver knew that she just couldn’t stay mad at him when he was wearing tuxes.

Only when the flashlights of the cameras around them blinded him, he realized that he had forgotten everything else around him because all his attention had focused on her like it always when she was around. The only concurrence she had was Emmeline because he was never able to decide who he wanted to focus on, his wife of his daughter. With the reality sneaking back to his awareness, though, he also became aware of everything else around him. His grip on Felicity tightened on own accord when they turned around to smile into the cameras, giving the press some good pictures. Oliver hated that, but that he had to pose for the press, especially with Felicity because he wanted her far away from any danger, but he knew that he didn’t really have a choice. They were taking photos of her anyway, so he wanted her to at least be right beside him.

The whole campaign Thea had worked out for him was based on his love for his family and how his love for them was the reason for why he wanted to become mayor. He wanted to make the city a place where his family could live safely. That was the strategy, so having Felicity at his side most of the time was important for the campaign. And it matched perfectly with his private goals to spend as much time as possible with his wife.

“I guess you will be glued to my side for the rest of the evening?” Oliver asked. “Or do you want to go home because-“

“I cannot go home,” Felicity said without moving her lips, so she was still smiling while talking. “I am your wife. If I leave, all headlines with state that we are getting divorced, and that might end up in all the ladies trying to hook up with you even more than they already do or even worse they might ruin your candidacy. And then your sister is going to kill me. And Tommy will die because he is still in me. And then Emmy will kill Thea because it’s her fault, and you will kill Emmy because she killed your sister. And you will be all alone because all your family is dead… Wow, that is sad…”

Oliver chuckled and pressed his lips against her temple, making the flashlights hail down on them even more. Lowering his lips to her ear, he whispered, “I think I would rather help Emmy to kill Thea if she kills you.”

“Good to know you are loyal to me,” Felicity laughed and then leaned her head against his shoulder with a sigh.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go home?” he asked, turning her back around to him when the flashlights finally stopped and the reporters found other people to annoy.

“Absolutely. I will stand by your side every step on the way,” she told him with a smile.

Oliver felt his heartbeat fasten. There was a lot of love in her eyes, the same love that was always there, even when she was mad at him for something. But right now there was something else in her eyes, something there was probably always there, too, but just not as intense as it was now. Pride. Felicity was proud of him. Like really actually proud of who he had become and what he was doing. Oliver doubted that he would really love to be mayor, but seeing in her eyes how proud she was, was worth it anyway.

He lowered his head and kissed her gently, nuzzling her nose with his to make her smile. If possible, Felicity leaned even more against him like she was trying to melt her body to his. And Oliver responded by rubbing her back because he knew that it had to hurt with all the extra weight she was carrying because of Tommy.

Just when he was about to deepen the kiss a little more, just as much as it was still decent for the situation they were in of course, he heard familiar steps coming closer, and pulled away with a sigh, turning his head.

“Thea,” she said with another sigh. “What can I do for you?”

“I just wanted to remind you of your speech. It is time,” she said.

Oliver nodded. “Just give me a moment. And get John here.”

Thea nodded and hurried away.

“I think she is the only one who is more excited about the idea that you might get mayor than we are.”

“I think a lot of people are more excited about me becoming mayor than I am,” Oliver mumbled.

He had not intended to let Felicity hear that, but her head turned around to him quickly and she eyed him up with a slight wrinkle between her eyebrows, so she definitely had heard him. Oliver hastily smiled, trying to make her forget what he had said, but Felicity was still looking at him intensely.

“Oliver, do you-“

“Here we got John, and you, brother dearest, are going on stage now,” Thea stated.

She tugged him to the direction of the stage, and John wrapped his arms around Felicity from behind, holding her upright, so she didn’t have to carry all her weight on her hurting feet. As little as Oliver wanted to give another speech, he was grateful that Thea had pulled him away in just the moment she had. Now was not the time or place to talk to Felicity about what he had said. Because what was he supposed to say? He was sure that he would be okay with being mayor although there had been other plans he had had for the future, but if it made Felicity happy and she believed that it would be good for him or them or the city or whatever – then fine!

When he stepped onto the stage, people turned around to look at him and stopped the conversations they were having. His eyes immediately searched for Felicity. John just helped her into a chair, positioning himself behind her, so he could massage her shoulders and neck slightly. Lyla brought her a glass of water. Felicity really shouldn’t be here, Oliver thought.

As soon as everyone was looking at him and his audience was deadly quiet, Oliver took a deep breath and said, “Hi, everyone. I’m Oliver Queen, but you probably know that since there are posters with my face and name on it all over the city. I am kind of famous… again.”

Everyone laughed, but it was Felicity’s laugh that he focused on. She had been the one to tell him that maybe he should start with a joke – “but not a knock-knock joke because nobody likes knock-knock jokes”. Oliver smiled at her and she winked at him, nodding encouragingly.

“Anyway, the reason that I am famous again nowadays is a completely different and so much better one than before,” Oliver continued. “The reason all of you know my name today is because I am one of the few people who still believe that this city, as dark as it is from time to time, can still be saved. I believe that this home can return to greatness. The reason I do believe so is because I have to. I have to believe that this city can be a better place again because this is the city where I want to spend the rest of my life with my wife and where I want to raise my children and see my grandchildren being born. My family is the reason I am standing here today and tell you that our city can be great again. But I cannot do this alone, even with the help of my family and friends. Because the only way that we are gonna return our home to greatness is to do so together, united.”

The people applauded, but Oliver didn’t move from his position at the lectern. He had given his speech. There was no more about it. From now on he was supposed to talk to all the people here more privately and convince them to vote for him by charming them or letting Felicity charm them because she was pretty good at that. Anyway, there was something more he had to say.

He waited until the audience became quiet again before he continued, “I would like to express my gratitude to my family. My sister Thea was the one who inspired me not only to run for mayor but also for the way I want to change the city and reunite all of us again. And as many of you probably already know I adore my wife.”

His eyes locked on Felicity’s face. She had blushed at his words and was now smiling at him with the same adoration he was sure his face showed. A lot of other eyes turned into her direction, observing her reaction to his words.

“Felicity is the best that ever happened to me, and I am sure that I wouldn’t be standing here today if it wasn’t for her. And because she has done so much for me and because I love her so much, I hope all of you understand when I send her home as soon as I leave this stage because as you might have noticed by now, she is expecting our second child and although I am a man and can only assume what it feels like to carry a baby in front of me all the time, I am sure that it makes you tired.” Again the audience laughed, this time only shortly. He saw a few women, probably mothers, nodding their heads. “That is why I would like to send my wife home where she can make herself comfortable and doesn’t have to be on her feet most of the time. I think we will still have a great evening, though. So enjoy the food, enjoy the drinks and I’ll come talk to everyone who wants to as soon as my wife is sitting in a car on her way home.”

When he left the stage, people were applauding him again, but Oliver barely listened. He headed right towards Felicity, crouching down next to her chair and putting a hand to her knee, caressing it gently.

“I don’t have to go home,” Felicity assured him before he could say anything. “I am fine. Really.”

Oliver kissed her forehead and shook his head. “You will go home and rest. You have a very important job with carrying our baby, and you deserve to rest.”

“But-“

“No objection,” Oliver said firmly, shaking his head once more.

Felicity seemed to consider objecting nonetheless, but then she gave in with a sigh, nodding her head, and Oliver smiled.

“Fine, I am heading home.”

Oliver straightened up and took a look around to see Laurel walking to them.

“Shall I take you home?” she asked Felicity.

“Oh, I am just going to take a cab,” Felicity responded, lifting the hem of her dress to try and take off her shoes, but no matter how far she spread her legs to lean down without the bump bothering, she couldn’t reach down enough to reach the buckle. Oliver wasn’t surprised. He had often helped her to take on shoes or socks lately.

“I actually wanted to head home anyway,” Laurel explained while Oliver crouched down once more to help Felicity taking off her shoes. “My dad doesn’t exactly get Emmy to go into bed and asked me to come over and help.”

“Oh, I could just pick her up and take her home,” Felicity suggested.

“No,” Laurel replied hastily, smiling when everybody around looked at her. “I barely get to see her. When she isn’t with you, Thea claims her, so the only time I can spend a little more time with her is if she is at my father’s place, and you mom is not there.”

Oliver smiled at the knowledge that all their friends were practically fighting over where Emmeline was going to spend time. His daughter was such a lovely sweetheart that everybody wanted to have more time with her. Oliver didn’t even know why he loved that thought so much, but he did.

When he had taken Felicity’s shoes off, he helped her up onto her feet, and smiled at the expression in her face. She seemed to be more than relieved that the shoes were gone, and she could stand on her own again. While she was gathering the fabric of her dress and lifted it a few feet off the floor, Oliver said, “I think it’s a good idea. Laurel taking you home.”

“I’ll get the car started,” Laurel said and left.

“Oliver, she will have to make a detour to drop me at home.”

“I am just trying to find the way that will get you home in our comfortable bed as soon as possible,” Oliver apologized, approaching her and framing her face with his hands to kiss her gently. “Because in our comfortable bed you can sleep and rest your feet and your back.”

He smiled when she hummed contently at the thought. But then she poked her index finger into his chest, saying, “You owe me make-up sex.”

“When did we fight?” he asked.

“Back when we talked about that stupid, stupid dress because it is your fault I couldn’t try it on and just now when you went over my head with the decision to let Laurel take me home despite the detour. Which means that you owe me make-up sex twice.”

Oliver bit his tongue at the thought. He loved make-up sex. They often had make-up sex because whenever one of them felt like a little rough, but yet so loving and reassuring make-up sex they would just start a stupid, meaningless fight which let both of them know that it was only about the sexy make up afterwards. So to owe Felicity make-up sex didn’t really bother him too much.

“Speaking of decisions over one’s head,” Felicity suddenly said, “you said earlier that-“

“Ollie?”

Thea had bad timing relatively often. Oliver couldn’t even count how often his little sister had walked in on him and Felicity having sex. Today her timing was perfect, though. This was the second time she saved Oliver from having to talk to Felicity about what had slipped his mind earlier.

“What’s up?” he asked.

“Paul Edwards,” Thea said, gesturing to an older man somewhere behind her, “one of the past mayors of the city would like to meet you. I am almost certain that if your protective hubby behavior won’t convince the people to vote for you, his blessing will.”

Oliver turned around to Felicity once more, kissing her shortly. When he took a step back from her, Felicity held onto the lapels of his jacket, pulling him back against her.

“Will you still wear the tuxes when I wake up after your return?”

“Would I take them off without the obligatory I-am-turned-on-by-your-tuxes-sex?” he asked, ignoring his sisters choking noise in his back.

Felicity grinned and straightened up onto her tiptoes, kissing him.

“And about what you said before-“

“We will talk about that at home, okay?” Oliver asked.

Felicity hesitated shortly but then nodded, and Oliver kissed her forehead once more before he took a step back again, watching her gathering the fabric of her dress once more, taking her shoes and starting to walk towards the exit, only waving once more before she left the hall.

Her feet and back still hurt of course. With Emmy the last weeks of pregnancy had been hard, she thought while walking towards the stairs, but with Tommy it was so much worse. She had no idea how she had managed to even get into her high heels earlier this evening, never mind walking from her living room to the car and from the car into the hall where she had finally been able to fall into John’s arm and had let him carry all her weight.

High heels in her condition – what had Thea and she been thinking? Like pregnancy itself wasn’t making it hard enough to work, no, she had to-

“Felicity?!”

She stopped at the middle of the stairs, turning around to Thea who hurried after her.

“What’s going on? Did something happen?”

“You lost your necklace,” Thea responded, lifting her hand and opening her palm so the small arrowhead necklace showed.

Felicity’s right hand moved to her chest, finding that the necklace was indeed gone from her neck without her noticing because the visual proof just wasn’t enough, she thought.

“Oh my God, thank you!” Felicity hurried to say when Thea threw the necklace to her and she caught it by encasing it with both of her hands. She looked down onto the necklace, swiping her thumb over the gravure. Then she looked back up at her sister-in-law. “Your brother gave me this for our last anniversary. This is my lucky charm. If I had lost that…”

Thea smiled. “Don’t worry. If I hadn’t found it, someone would have found it while cleaning up, so you would have gotten it back anyway. What is that gravure? Looks like… I don’t know… Russian?”

Felicity grinned. “Oliver’s, Emmy’s and my name in Cyrillic letters. As soon as Tommy is born, his name will be added, too.”

“Tommy?!” Thea almost squealed and Felicity’s eyes widened. “Oh my God! You are having a little baby boy! Emmy is going to have brother, and you are going to name him after Tommy, that is so… Oh my God!”

“No, no, no, no, no,” Felicity said over and over again, shaking her head wildly. She had insisted that Oliver wasn’t going to tell anyone, so as soon as he would learn that she had told someone, even if accidently, he was going to tease her about that for the rest of… their lives. “I mean… if it is a boy his name will be Tommy, but it could also be a boy and-“

She realized her mistake the second her bare foot stepped onto the soft fabric of her dress. To get away quickly, she had wanted to start walking backwards, but since she still held the necklace in both of her hands, the too long fabric of the dress had pooled on the floor around her. One moment she was trying to take a step back, the next she felt herself falling. The edge of one step dug painfully into her back, her head banged against the edge of another one. And then she rolled down the rest of the stairs, feeling pain basically everywhere.

When her body came to rest at the even ground, she looked up at the ceiling breathlessly. Her hand moved to touch her bump, to make sure Tommy was alright, but her fingers felt numb. And she only heard Thea scream her name distantly before her eyes fell shut and everything went black.


	78. So much darker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I worked my butt off to get this finished today. So I am maybe a little evil regarding the plotline, but I am kind of nice regarding the time between I post chapters I think. :D

_“It’s so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone.”  
John Steinbeck_

 

The moment he heard his sister screaming his wife’s name in panic, Oliver dropped his glass of champagne to the floor carelessly, turning around on his heels, and started running to where her voice had come from. While he was crossing the hall, a million different scenarios played in his head. Felicity was being abducted. Felicity was being shot at. Felicity was hurt in any other way because someone had attacked her. Just like he had always feared.

As soon as he entered the foyer, he yelled for the reporters to move the hell away. They were blocking his way and view, shooting photos and recording videos of what they saw. One reporter even had the nerve to anchor a live show. He didn’t know if they were scared of him or just wanted to get better pictures or actually wanted to be at least a little more helpful, but some of the reporters moved away enough for him get through the crowd to the head of the stairs from where he could see what had caused Thea’s panicked scream and had called the reporter’s attention.

His sister was crouching at the foot of the stairs, leaning over an unconscious, pale Felicity.

It took Oliver only half a second before he reacted. Acting on instinct, he jumped down the stairs, immediately going down onto his knees next to Felicity’s head. He reached out his hands to caress her face, to just touch her and feel the warmth of her body, but didn’t dare to touch her when he saw blood coming from the back of her head. It didn’t look like it was much, but it was there. His eyes checked her for more injuries, but couldn’t find any.

What was he supposed to do?   
Was she still alive?  
Did he have to check her pulse?  
Or was she dead already?  
Had somebody called an ambulance?  
When could they be here?  
What the hell was he supposed to do?

Oliver sat beside her as motionlessly as she lay there. He needed to touch her, do something. Anything. He couldn’t just sit there and stare at her. He needed to help her, but he felt so helplessly. Everything around him seemed inexistent. There was just her. And he continued to stare at her, stare at the most important person in his life and the way she lay there bruised and... Almost as if she was-

“Oliver!”

The shout of his name sounded like it was far away, and it took him a while before he realized that John’s hands were pulling at him, trying to drag him away or move him or whatever. But Oliver didn’t let himself be moved. He was supposed to be by her side, to hold her hand or tell her that everything was going to be alright, that she was going to be alright and their baby was going to be alright. His right hand hovered over her bump, but he was afraid to touch it, afraid of what he would or wouldn’t feel.

He couldn’t lose her. He couldn’t lose them. They had fought so hard to get together and to get through this pregnancy despite all the obstacles. He couldn’t lose her now. He knew now more than ever that there was no future waiting for him if Felicity wasn’t there. She had made him a happy man, a man who lived in the light, so if she wasn’t there anymore, how was he supposed to stay in the light she had enlightened in and all around him? Now that he knew what it really meant to be happy-

“Oliver!”

This time his friend’s shout ripped him out of his paralyzed like state. The world around him seemed to move in normal pace again, and Oliver became aware of all the noises that came from the reporters and from Lyla, Roy and Thea, who were trying to get them to stop taking photos and videos of what was happening. As soon as Felicity was better, Oliver going to sue every reporter who used any of those pictures, he swore himself. John had taken Thea’s place next to Felicity, eying her up, checking her breathing and pulse.

Finally Oliver was able to touch her. His right hand moved over the crown of her hair, feeling the soft curls und his fingertips, and his left hand rested on her bump ever so lightly. Finally! But his heartbeat fastened when he felt how hard the bump was, so much harder than usually.

“Felicity, can you hear me?” he whispered, moving his right hand from the crown of her head to her cheek, stroking gently the way he usually did when he woke her up on a Sunday morning when Emmy was with them and kisses that could lead to more were no option. But unlike those times, Felicity didn’t move. Dragging his gaze away from her face, Oliver turned his eyes to his friend. “John?”

“I called the ambulance, but there are too many emergencies tonight and-“

John was interrupted when there was first a lightening and then a sudden drought that was followed by new noises from the reporters and more flashlights from their cameras. Oliver didn’t even have to turn his head to know what that meant. He had experienced this a few times before, and so had John. And unlike the first time, John didn’t freak out now.

“Saw what happened in the news and was nearby anyway. What can I do?”

“You need to take her to the hospital,” Oliver stated, not looking at Barry who had come here as the Flash. He pushed one arm under Felicity’s neck, the other under her knees and lifted her from the floor carefully. She still didn’t move, and her head just rolled to his shoulder. He hastily pressed a kiss to her forehead before he turned around to Barry or the Flash as most people saw him. He carefully placed her into their friend’s arm. “She is the most important person in my life. Please save her.”

Barry only nodded. Then he was gone. Oliver kept staring at the empty spot where Barry had stood not even a second ago with Felicity in his arms.

What the hell had happened?   
One moment she had been waving goodbye at him with a smile on her beautiful lips, and now she was…

The hoot of a car outside pulled him a little further back to reality.

“That’s Laurel,” John stated, gripping Oliver’s upper arm and pulling him with him outside and into Laurel’s car.

Oliver’s eyes were focused on his hands. There was blood on them, Felicity’s blood. But why was there blood on his left hand? The right hand had rested on top of her head, and he had shortly touched the bruise at the back of it to make sure that it wasn’t too deep or anything That was how the blood had come to his right hand. But how had the blood come to his left hand? His left hand had been under the back of her knees. How had the blood from her head come down to her legs and onto his hand? Oliver knew in the back of his mind that there was something else that could possibly be responsible for the blood on his left hand. But he couldn’t allow himself to even think about that.

The drive to the hospital was like a blur, and so was the way from the car to the lobby and finally to the waiting area. From the moment Barry had disappeared with Felicity in his arms, Oliver had been falling back in the same paralyzed state as before. He felt numb, disconnected to his own body, like he was caught in a robot he couldn’t control. He moved where John pulled him, but he barely registered anything that happened. He was caught in his thoughts even now that they were sitting in the uncomfortable chairs in front of the restricted area. His eyes were focused on the doors behind which he knew Felicity was undergoing surgery right now. He hadn’t heard much of what the nurse at the reception desk had said, but he had understood that she was having surgery. John had repeated it at least three times until Oliver had nodded.

Felicity was in the OR. She was undergoing surgery. The nurse had said something about the baby and her being in danger. She had asked them to wait. So they had sat down in the waiting area - John to Oliver’s right, Laurel to his left. Oliver didn’t know when, but Lyla, Thea, Roy and Barry had joined them at one point. There was no real conversation. Only every now and then someone was whispering something.

Oliver didn’t listen. His thoughts were still running wildly.

What if he lost Felicity? What if she and Tommy wouldn’t make it? He was going to die. Right here. If they weren’t making it, neither was he. And even if he didn’t die immediately, he would die shortly later. He would take care of that. If he was going to lose them, he didn’t want to live anymore either. Maybe it seemed selfish because of course he had one more child to think about, but what good would he be for Emmy if he lost half of their family? How was he going to be a good father when he was going to fall back into darkness because of what had happened tonight? Emmy deserved better. Felicity and he had made provision in case they were going to die. He loved Emmy, so he would probably try and continue living for her, but… He couldn’t picture himself being a good father without Felicity by his side. And Emmy deserved the best.

On the other hand she was Emmy and once he saw her, he would probably realize how stupid this was. He was out of his mind right now. He needed to pull himself together. For Felicity, Tommy and Emmy. He needed to be strong for all of them.

He tried to think about a deal he could make with God, but what was he going to ask? To let at least Felicity live? He knew that he and Felicity could survive a lot, but losing a child? Could they do that? Maybe, but he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to lose Tommy. And neither did he want to lose Felicity.

When had been the last time he had told her that he loved her? Did she know that he loved her? Or did she just assume it because he had said it several times over the year? Did she really like from the deep of her heart know that he loved her? When had been the last time he had said it. Or showed it to her? Did she know?

God, she needed to wake up! She needed to wake up, so he could tell her and show her how much he loved her.

And Tommy. He needed to show Tommy how much he loved him, too. Did babies know that their parents loved them even when they weren’t born? Tommy needed to at least be held once in his life. At least once.

They both needed to make it. They both needed to make it. They both needed to make it. They both needed to make it. They both needed to make it. They both needed to make it.

He repeated the words in his head over and over again like a prayer.

“They are going to make it,” Lyla said, putting her hand to his shoulder, rubbing small circles, and only then he realized that he had been talking out aloud.

Slowly he became newly aware of his surroundings. Oliver looked around shortly. John still sat to Oliver’s right, Lyla now to his left. Roy sat next to Lyla, Thea on his other side, her head resting on his shoulder as quiet tears streamed down her cheeks. Barry was walking up and down with his hands in the pocket of his jeans.

“Where is Laurel?” Oliver asked, frowning. He hadn’t noticed that she had left.

“She has gone home,” Lyla answered. “Emmy won’t sleep, and Donna called. She watched the news and has seen part of what has happened. Quentin can’t take care of both of them at the same time.”

“Did someone tell Donna?” he asked because as little as he understood what had happened himself, he knew that Donna needed to be told the little information they had.

“Laurel wanted to take care of everything. We call her if there is any news and then she tells her father and Donna.”

“What about Emmy?” Oliver asked. Lyla looked at John, so Oliver turned his head around to his friends, asking, “Does Emmy know?”

“No,” John answered. “We will wait until we know what is going on. Only then we will think about telling Emmeline anything. For now she is just staying the night at Lance’s place just like planned. Laurel will cancel every appointment she has tomorrow and take care of Emmy for as long as you need it. But for now we will just assume that Felicity will be fine by the end of the night.”

Oliver nodded. “How long is she in the OR now?”

“Thirty-eight minutes since we came here, but Felicity arrived here sooner, so it might be longer,” John answered.

Again Oliver nodded.

Thirty-eight minutes. Was that long? It seemed long. And it felt longer than thirty-eight minutes. More like thirty-eight hours. Time had never run that slowly. Even on the island time hadn’t felt as eternal as it did now.

Oliver rubbed his hands that were still covered in blood, dried blood by now, over his face in exhaustion. He had heard distantly how Thea had told what had happened. Felicity had tripped on her dress because she had held a necklace in her hands instead of the fabric of her too long dress, and then she had fallen down the stairs. And now she and Tommy were in deadly danger.

Because of him. They were in danger because of him. He had distracted Felicity from trying on the dress which had been the reason for why she had to wear high heels that she had slipped off when she had wanted to leave and which was why she had tripped on that stupid dress and was now in the OR. This was all his fault.

“Oliver,” Lyla said softly, putting her hand to his that was balled into a tight fist around the arrowhead necklace Felicity had caught. He had given that necklace to her. She had caught it and had let go of the hem of her dress which was why she had tripped on it. He had given her the necklace. He had distracted her from trying on the dress. It was all his fault. When his hands opened around the necklace there was a little blood on the palm where the edges had dug into his skin.

Lyla took the necklace from him, and Oliver let it happen.

“Give it to me,” Thea asked, reaching out her hand. “I will let Tommy’s name engrave in it.”

Oliver frowned at his sister. “How do you-?”

“Felicity told me,” Thea answered. “It just slipped her mind.”

“That little traitor,” Oliver mumbled. “She was the one who didn’t want anybody to know. She was-“

When he felt tears forming in his eyes, he hastily got up, kicking his chair away with a loud shout of anger and pain. A few other people looked in their direction, but Lyla hastily smiled at them, gesturing that he was not a danger to anyone. It only made him angrier, angrier at himself. He didn’t even know whether she was dead yet, and he was already going back to the much more brutal behavior of before he had been with her.

He went to the nearest wall and hit his fist against it over and over again. The first hit almost hurt his knuckles a little bit. The second punch made cracks show in the wall. The third let his fist move through the wall. The fourth made the material of the wall scratch his hand. And he still punched into the hole over and over again, not caring about the little blood that was running over his skin.

Although he knew that John and Roy were both standing right behind him, neither of them moved. They let him hit the wall over and over again. And they let him scream all his pain and anger out.

Why did life refuse to give Felicity and him some normality? Was it too much to ask to have a child born without any drama going on? Last time Cupid had tried to cut Emmy out of Felicity’s uterus to raise her as her own daughter and get Oliver to love her with that. And now Felicity was fighting for her and for Tommy’s life!

“Why the hell did this happen?!” he yelled. “Why don’t we deserve to have just one normal moment?! Why can’t we just for once be happy at a day like this?! Why?! Why?! Why?!”

He hit the wall over and over again, hoping that it would make him feel better, but it didn’t really change anything. He continued to feel the same empty darkness in his heart as before he had started hitting the wall. He wasn’t getting tired, wasn’t feeling better. All he could think about was Felicity. Felicity and Tommy. And how he might lose both of them tonight.

Because of his own damn actions.

“Oliver.”

He ignored John’s calm voice, continuing to hit the wall instead.

“Oliver.”

He let out a grunt at Roy’s more urgent voice.

“Ollie!”

Giving up on punching the wall, Oliver turned around to his sister breathlessly. He could see from the corner of his eyes that Lyla was talking to some security guards who had probably been alarmed when he had freaked out. Most of his attention was focused on Thea, though. She looked at him with wide eyes and-

The moment he heard it, his heart stopped beating and his mind went blank. Ever so slowly he turned his head in the direction from which the cry had come. He found a nurse standing in front of the doors to the restricted area, holding a little bundle that was wrapped in a blue blanket in her arms. It were the cries that came from what was wrapped up in that blanket that called all his attention now. And just like it had been those cries that had made his heart stop and his mind go blank, it were those cries that made his heart beat again and occupied all his thoughts.

The nurse flashed John a nervous glance, and he nodded encouragingly. She still hesitated, but slowly put one foot in front of the other, stepping closer to Oliver.

“Mr. Queen?” she said quietly. “I thought you might want to meet your son.”

Oliver couldn’t move. Again. So the nurse stepped forward until she was standing right in front of him, putting the little baby in his arms. All Oliver could do was staring. He was small, so much smaller than Emmeline he had been, and she had seemed unbelievably small in his arms already. His face was crumpled, dark hair on top his head. And when the newborn opened his eyes, Oliver saw his own deeply blue eyes in his son’s face.

Quiet tears streamed down his face now, but Oliver didn’t even try to hold them back. He lowered his lips to his son’s forehead, kissing it gently, feeling the warmth of his body against his skin. With closed eyes he breathed in his scent, the sweet scent only newborns had.

“18.3 inches and exactly 5 pounds,” the nurse stated with an insecure smile. “He is perfectly healthy.”

Oliver pressed a few more kisses to his son’s face, his tears falling onto Tommy’s skin, but he didn’t seem to mind too much. The newborn was becoming quieter, slowly drifting off into sleep.

“Hi, Tommy,” Oliver whispered into his ear, so only he could hear it. “You don’t have to be scared anymore. I’m here now. And I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Pressing one last kiss to his son’s forehead, he looked back at the nurse.

“My wife?”

“The doctor will come any second and-“ the nurse began, but stopped, when a doctor came from the restricted area, looking at him. “Mr. Queen?”

Oliver nodded.

“Hi, I am Dr. Rubens. I am your wife’s doctor. She lost a lot of blood caused by a placental abruption that itself was caused by the fall. We thought about performing a hysterectomy to get control over the bleeding, but luckily that wasn’t necessary. We managed to stabilize her blood circulation without doing so. She received some blood transfusions to help with that. She has several fractured ribs and slight contusions. Those will hurt, but just need some time to heal and won’t leave permanent damage. The bruise at the back of her head has not been too deep. She needed a few stitches, but that is it. When she wakes up, we will check her for cerebral concussion, but I don’t think there will be any permanent damage left. She is being taken to a recovery room right now, but as soon as she is connected to the monitors, you can see her. It might take a little while until she wakes up, though, and she might be confused and disorientated and tired.”

Oliver nodded again, whispering, “Thank you.”

He suddenly felt unbelievably tired and exhausted. Slowly he went back to his chair. Someone had put it back in place after he had kicked it away before. He sat down there, cradling Tommy to his chest tightly, fighting the urge to just crush him to his chest. Tommy was asleep now, looking so content.

“Mr. Queen,” the doctor called Oliver’s attention once more, and Oliver looked at him, “your wife and your son were lucky they survived. If they had been taken to the hospital without super speed by that Flash guy, I don’t know if we would have been able to save either of them.”

Oliver nodded, shortly turning his eyes to Barry, who only shrugged his shoulders and smiled sadly like he felt embarrassed for something. Only when the doctor and the nurse had left, Oliver said, “Thank you, Barry. If you hadn’t come by-“

“I don’t think anybody here wants to think about what would have happened if I hadn’t come by,” Barry said with a short nod. “So let’s not think about that. Felicity and you, you have done so much for me… The least I can do is to give you back for that whenever you need help.”

Oliver sighed, feeling a lot of the weight that had been burdening him in the last minutes or however long they were here now fall off of him. Tommy was okay. Felicity was going to be okay. Everything was going to be okay.

When the nurse came to take him to Felicity’s room, Oliver gave Tommy to Thea. There was only one visitor allowed at her bed for now although they might make an exception if he wanted to take Tommy with him. But Oliver needed a moment alone with Felicity. And Tommy was surely going to wake up soon and demand some food. Felicity needed to rest, so Oliver didn’t want Tommy’s cries to wake her up. He pressed a kiss to his son’s forehead and followed the nurse to Felicity’s room.

Oliver waited until the nurse had left before he entered the room she had shown him. The moment he saw Felicity lying in the bed, he felt new tears forming in his eyes. Felicity was just as pale as she had been when she had been lying on the floor before. Her eyes were closed, her hair now falling softly around her face. A tube was put under her nose to give her more oxygen, and her heartbeat was being monitored.

He fought the paralysis he felt his body wanted to go back to. He hadn’t done anything for too long. He had felt like paralyzed from the fear to lose her. But Felicity was alive. And she was fine. And Tommy was alive and fine, too.

So Oliver crossed the room until he came to stand next to Felicity’s bed. He put a hand to hers and pressed a kiss to her forehead, just like he had kissed Tommy’s forehead over and over again before. He put his right hand to her cheek and leaned his lips to her ear, whispering, “You don’t have to worry about anything. I already saw Tommy and I held him and he is healthy. And perfect. Everything is alright. There is nothing you have to worry about or be scared of.”

Oliver didn’t know whether she heard him, but he needed to say it anyway. He needed to say it to reassure her and to reassure himself. After everything that had happened, he needed to hear himself say those words. Everything is alright.

He stayed the way he was with his forehead resting against hers and his one hand at her cheek, the other on hers for a while, breathing in sync with her. Then he sat down at the chair next to her bed, holding her hand and watching her, waiting for her to wake up.

 

 

Hours had passed.

After one hour Felicity had moved slightly and Oliver had gotten up from his chair immediately, talking to her quietly to reassure her, but she had stopped moving again. She hadn’t woken up, though. In the two hours since that she had moved from time and time again, and every time Oliver had thought that now was the moment she would wake up, but her eyes had stayed closed.

He was sitting in this room for three hours and twelve minutes now, only interrupted by the few times he had left to check on Tommy, who had now been through several medical tests, a first diaper change and God knew what else. He was worried that she still hadn’t woken up even when the nurses and the doctor had assured him that there was no reason to worry, at least not yet. Oliver wondered when the moment to worry was, but tried not to think too much about it. Felicity was alive, and that was all he needed to focus on right now.

It was after midnight by now, and Oliver was tired, but he refused to let sleep lull him in. As long as Felicity hadn’t woken up, he was too worried to sleep anyway.

Playing with the fingers on her left hand, he tried to keep himself busy. He had put her engagement ring and wedding band back to her finger. The hospital staff had taken it away before they had brought her into the OR. But the rings just belonged onto her fingers. Oliver loved seeing them there. They assured him that she belonged to him as much as his ring reminded him that he belonged to her.

Just when Oliver decided that it was time to look after Tommy, who was taken care of by John, Lyla, Thea, Roy and Barry, who all refused to leave, Felicity sighed and moved slightly. Immediately Oliver got up from the chair again, sitting down at the edge of the bed and put his free hand to her cheek, stroking her soft skin gently.

“Felicity?” he whispered. “Hey, can you hear me?”

“’l’ver?” she more sighed than said, a deep frown forming on her forehead.

“Yes, it’s me,” Oliver whispered, kissing the tip of her nose. “God, you scared the hell out of me. How are you feeling? Any pain? Shall I call the doctor? Is-“

“Wha- what happened?” she breathed, her eyes slowly opening a little.

“You tripped on your dress and fell down the stairs,” Oliver answered, now framing her face with both of his hands.

His heart was beating rapidly, and he was kind of breathless. Still relief washed over him. He had been so close to losing her and Tommy, but now it seemed like both of them were fine. Felicity was tired and disorientated, just like the doctor had assumed before, but she was talking as much as her condition let her, and she had her eyes opened and-

When her eyes suddenly widened, Oliver frowned. He was just about to ask her what was wrong when he followed her gaze to her hand on her stomach, a stomach that was missing the bump she had carried for the last months.

Her other hand came to grip his forearms, her nails trying to dig into his skin, but that was prevented by the fabric of his dress shirt. The panicked expression in her eyes and the way her lips opened and closed again and again without a sound coming out were proof enough for what she believed had happened, though.

“No, no, no, no,” Oliver hastily said, shaking his head and holding her face a little more tightly in his hands to make her look at him, but unlike normally it didn’t seem to reassure her. “Felicity, everything is alright. Tommy is alright. He is-“

“You- you’re just saying that,” she said breathlessly, trying to squirm from his hold, but Oliver only held her more tightly.

“No, Felicity,” he objected. “Tommy is fine. “18.3 in-“

She kept shaking her head, not believing that he told her the truth, and Oliver got why. He had needed visual proof that both of them were okay, too, because doctors could lie or be wrong. Felicity needed to see Tommy.

“Thea!” he yelled, making Felicity wince at the loudness of his voice.

Immediately the door to the room opened, and Thea stood in the door frame, asking, “What’s going on? I was just on my way to sit at Felicity’s side, so you could go check on- O my god! Felicity! You are awake! O my-“

“Thea, get Tommy here,” Oliver said urgently. Thea frowned, opening her mouth to say something, but Oliver shook his head, adding, “Now!”

So Thea left again, and Oliver turned his head to look back at Felicity. She still looked panicked, but she wasn’t squirming anymore. Her breaths were coming quickly, the monitor showed that her heartbeat had fastened, but she seemed to relax more and more. Her eyes were falling shut again. She was fighting against the need to fall back asleep, but she lost the fight.

Oliver put his lips to her ear the way he had done it when he had first entered the room, and repeated his words from back then. “You don’t have to worry about anything. I already saw Tommy, and I held him in my arms, and he is healthy. And perfect. Everything is alright. There is nothing you have to worry about or be scared of.”  
Maybe this time she would hear him.

When Thea reentered the room half a minute later, Felicity was already deeply asleep again, her breathing and her heartbeat slowed down.

“Sorry, it took that long, but Lyla was just taking a photos of her to send to everyone,” she said while stepping into the room. “Is Felicity asleep again?”

Oliver nodded with a sigh. “She panicked when she woke up. She didn’t believe me when I told her that Tommy was alright, so I wanted her to see him.”

“Sorry,” Thea whispered. “Do you need a break? Do you want to take Tommy and go and get some fresh air? I could stay here, so Felicity won’t be alone when she wakes up.”

“I’d rather stay here. She woke up once. She might wake up again soon,” he answered. “But I’d like to have Tommy stay here, so she can see him as soon as she wakes up again.”

Thea nodded, crossed the distance to him and put Tommy into his arms. The little boy was asleep again, still wrapped up into that blue blanket. He was so small, and he looked so lost in Oliver’s strong arms. But Oliver knew that Tommy was safe where he was now. Nothing could happen to him as long as Oliver was just holding him close to his own body, making sure the little boy knew how much his daddy loved him.

“Ollie?” Thea whispered.

“Hm?” Oliver hummed, not looking away from his sleeping son.

“Are you alright?”

He turned his head to look at her, finding that she had pushed her hands into the pockets of Roy’s suit jacket he had put around her shoulders earlier the night. She looked uncomfortable with the conversation which made Oliver frown.

“I am exhausted. And still shocked about what happened, but I am fine. Mostly,” he added after a short second. “Why?”

“Because I guess this was all pretty hard for you because you know… you already lost so many people and if anything worse had happened to Felicity or Tommy, I guess you would have… I don’t know… I just wondered if you needed anything. Something to eat or a coffee?”

Oliver smiled tiredly. “Thank you, but I just want to sit here with Tommy and wait for Felicity to wake up again. Don’t you all want to go home? Felicity is alright, so there is no need for you to wait here.”

“Nobody is leaving until we have all seen her sitting in bed, holding Tommy in her arms, so we can congratulate her,” Thea answered. “I’ll go outside and tell the other’s what happened. I just snatched Tommy and ran away. They might thing I have kidnapped him.”

“Kidnapping babies runs in the family,” Oliver grinned, thinking about Emmy and how she had abducted that baby in the supermarket.

Thea cocked her head, looking at him in question. Felicity and he hadn’t told anybody about that story yet. There simply hadn’t been time with the campaign and the work in the Arrow cave and everything else. So he just shook his head and waved it off.

“If you need anything, just say so,” she said, squeezing his shoulder and leaving.

Oliver leaned back in his chair, sighing. When the newborn moved slightly in his arms, he looked down at him with a smile and asked, “Exciting first day, hm?”

 

 

He didn’t know how many more hours had passed. He had held Tommy all the time, not letting go even when the nurse had brought a newborn crib, so Oliver could have laid Tommy down and still have him here, but Oliver felt too comfortable with his son in his arms. He had fed him with one of those bottles with teats that needed to be sucked at similar to the mother’s breasts, so babies wouldn’t get nipple confusion. He hadn’t known that there was something like that until Emmeline had spent her first night at Thea’s place. Felicity had been afraid that something like that could have happened to her, so Oliver had founds those special bottles, and he had ordered three of those for him and some for the hospital as a gift.

“Tommy. I hope you like your name,” Oliver whispered, not able to bear the silence in the room. “If it had been up to your sister, you would have been named Nemo. Your mother tried to argue that that is a bad idea because Nemo is Latin and means ‘nobody’, and you are definitely somebody. I think she said anything like that… but I don’t think Emmy cared too much. So what do we learn from that? Your mommy is smart as hell, you’re daddy not so much, and your sister is stubborn as a-“

Oliver interrupted himself when Felicity sighed. His gaze turned from his sleeping son to his wife. Her eyes were still closed, but he could see in the way the muscles in her face were moving as well as her eyes were moving under her closed lids, and her breathing became a little uneven that she was waking up.

So Oliver hastily got up from his chair, like he had the times before when he had thought that she would wake up or the one time she actually had woken up already. He put Tommy to Felicity’s chest, so his tummy was resting against her breasts, his face against her neck. Gently he took one of her hands from the mattress and put it to Tommy’s back, putting his own hand on top of hers. He wanted Felicity to feel Tommy’s heartbeat under her palm and his hand on top of hers. She needed to know that Tommy was alive and that Oliver was here when she woke up now.

“Felicity?” he whispered when she opened her mouth and sighed once more. “Hey, someone is here to meet you.”

Just like he had only waited for it, Tommy made a quiet sound, moving slightly on top of Felicity’s chest. It made her open her eyes. For a short moment she looked around confusedly, but her gaze met the part of her son’s body she could see and with a sob she turned her head until she could fully see the newborn baby.

“Oh my God,” she whined when a few tears streamed down her cheeks. Her free hand came to caress the back of Tommy’s head, while her own head turned to press a kiss to her son’s forehead like Oliver had done it several times before. “He’s perfect. He is okay?”

“He is perfect,” Oliver assured her before he kissed her forehead. “Do you remember what happened?”

Felicity frowned, resting her head against Tommy’s and closing her eyes. The fingertips of her one hand still caressed the back of his little head, the other hand started rubbing circles on Tommy’s back, and it made the little baby close his eyes and fall back to sleep again.

When Felicity didn’t answer or open her eyes, Oliver asked, “Hey, are you still awake?”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed affirmatively. “Tripped on my dress and fell down the stairs?”

“Yes,” Oliver answered and kissed her forehead once more. “You scared the hell out of me.”

Felicity opened her eyes again. There was tiredness in them, a tiredness he had barely ever seen at her. But there was also the everlasting expression of love that he would never completely get used to no matter how often he had seen it already.

“Sorry,” she whispered.

Oliver shook his head, leaning down and kissing her lips gently. It only lasted for a short moment, but it made him feel better immediately. “You don’t have to apologize. This wasn’t your fault. It was mine.”

“You want to fight me on that?” Felicity asked with a yawn.

“I don’t want to fight with you.”

“We could have make-up sex right after.”

“The make-up sex would have to wait six weeks,” Oliver chuckled.

“Okay, no fighting then,” Felicity said with a tired smile and closed her eyes again, leaning her cheek to the crown of her daughter’s head once more. “Too tired anyway.”

Oliver put a hand to her knee, rubbing it comfortingly. “Are you okay apart from that?”

“My stomach hurts. My head hurts. Everything else hurts, too. And I have hallucination.”

“Hallucinations? Maybe the bruise at your head is worse than the doctor thought. You will stay here, and I will-“

“Well, I have to hallucinate since I see that you are still wearing your tuxes. I mean… Tommy on my chest, you in tuxes right next to me… There are only two ways this is possible, and I am very sure that it is not Christmas yet.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose. “No hallucination. Everything is real.”

“Are you still going to wear them when I wake up the next time? Because I feel like falling asleep again,” she said and yawned, snuggling her head closer to the crown of Tommy’s head. “And I didn’t get a chance to really appreciate the view.”

“Don’t worry,” Oliver whispered, stroking the knuckles of his fingers over her soft cheek. “I’ll wear them as long as you want me to wear them.”

“The rest of your life?”

“If that is what you want.”

“Hm…” she hummed affirmatively and smiled with her eyes still closed.

Oliver looked at her, trying to memorize the sight. Felicity looked relax even when tired. And she looked happy. And Tommy seemed content, as much as a boy that young could look content.

“Felicity?” he whispered, not wanting her to wake up, but needing to tell her something important.

“Hm?”

“I love you,” he whispered breathily and smiled at her.

Even though she couldn’t see it since her eyes were still closed, she smiled back at him, matching his own smile. “Love you, too.”

As her breathing became even, and he became more and more convinced that she was asleep again, he smiled even more. Yes, he thought, everything was alright again.


	79. Heaven is a place you cannot visit

Oliver watched Emmy getting comfortable in the bed he usually shared with Felicity. When he had offered her to sleep in his bed, she had taken her twenty most favorite stuffed animals from her room, put them into Felicity’s and his bed under the blankets and kissed every single one of them goodnight. Only then had she lain down herself.

After everything that had happened last night – Felicity’s fall, the emergency c-section, Tommy’s birth four weeks ahead of the appointment, Felicity’s long unconsciousness, her panicked reaction when she had woken up and found that her bump had been gone while Tommy had been nowhere to be seen for her and so much more – Oliver hadn’t really wanted to leave Felicity’s side, but then Laurel had called and told that she had spent the day at the zoo with Emmy and distracted her all day, but the toddler was getting nervous.

Of course Emmy had sensed that something had been wrong. She had been supposed to spend the night at Lance’s place just like she had. But Felicity or Oliver had been supposed to pick her up again the next morning which of course they hadn’t. Instead she had spent the day with Laurel, and although the two certainly had a lot of fun together, of course Emmy hadn’t missed that there was something going on.

So despite his desire to stay close to Felicity, Oliver had left Felicity’s side, driven home, taken a quick shower and gotten dressed just in time to open the door for Laurel, who had brought Emmy back. The toddler had jumped right at him, hugging him close and telling him how much she had missed him. And Oliver had held her tightly to him because after everything that had happened the hours before, he had just needed it.

Emmy hadn’t been told anything but that Felicity wasn’t home right now. Oliver had wanted to tell her about Tommy’s birth himself. He and Felicity had discussed whether they should take Emmy to the hospital to see Felicity and Tommy today, but they had agreed that they should wait until tomorrow. When he had left, Felicity had looked exhausted and she had been tired, and they just didn’t want Emmy to believe that her little brother was responsible for that. So they had agreed that Felicity should get some sleep and regain some more energy before Oliver would take Emmeline to see her mother and her brother right after breakfast tomorrow.

But for now it was time to tell Emmy that her little brother had finally been born. She had waited so long for this moment, and even if she was going to bug him all night with the question when they were finally going to the hospital, so she could see him, he just needed to tell her. He couldn’t wait for her reaction.

Taking a deep breath, he stepped closer to the bed, eying up all the place that was taken by his daughter’s stuffed animals. He perked his lips with a smile and cocked his head while looking at Emmy who was already under the blanket, her favorite stuffed Nemo in her arms.

“You got a little place for daddy in that bed?” he asked.

Immediately Emmy sat up and held out her Nemo to Oliver. As soon as he took it, holding it tightly to his own chest, she started to rearrange the other stuffed animals in the bed, putting some of them to the end of the bed where they could still be put under the blanket properly without taking all the space of the other bedside. When she had finished putting them to sleep, she smiled at him proudly, slapping her hand on the empty side of the bed next to her. Oliver lay down, and Emmy snuggled up to him, crawling on top of him and lying down with her tummy pressed to his chest and her head resting on his shoulder. Oliver gently rubbed her back.

“Did you have fun with Laurel today?” he asked, trying to get a little more time to figure out how exactly to tell her about Tommy. He didn’t know why, but he was so excited about telling her that it made him nervous. “She told me that you spent the day at the zoo.”

Emmy nodded, propping herself up onto her forearms, so she could lean over Oliver’s face. Her right hand moved over his cheek to play with his stubble.

“What animals did you see?”

“Aaaaaall the animals,” she said and smiled, sitting up on his chest and playing with his scars now.

“All the animals? Any favorite animal?” he asked, smiling back at her. He sat up, too, leaning against the headboard of the bed. It made Emmy slid down his chest, so she sat on his thighs now, but that seemed to give her only better access to the scars she loved to touch and kiss and play with.

The stubble and the scars – they seemed to be Emmy’s favorite features of his body. Like mother, like daughter.

“Pretty birds!”

“Pretty birds?”

Emmy nodded. “Laurel is a pretty bird.”

Oliver laughed. “Hon, I don’t think Laurel will be too happy if you call her a bird.”

“A _pretty_ bird, daddy!”

“Oh, a pretty bird, that might change everything,” he said, trying to hide his chuckle behind a serious tone of voice, but Emmy glared at him, seeing right through him. So Oliver cleared his voice and hastily changed the topic. “So… about mommy.”

“Mommy’s not here tonight,” Emmy repeated the words he had told her when she had asked about Felicity after she had come home and attacked him with kisses.

“Right,” Oliver affirmed with a nod his daughter couldn’t see because she was busy playing with the first scar he had ever gotten. “Do you want to know where she is?”

Emmy nodded without looking up.

“So…” Oliver started, his heart suddenly beating wildly in his chest, “you know the baby mommy was carrying in her tummy...”

Immediately Emmy looked up with wide eyes. Her hands stopped playing with his scarred skin, and the excitement was so evident in her face that it made Oliver’s heart skip a beat. He hadn’t known how much he had needed to see Emmy’s reaction to the news until now.

“Where is Nemo?”

Oliver opened his mouth, but closed it again. Emmy had chosen her own name for her little brother, and as much as Felicity and he had tried to tell her that the baby’s name was not going to be Nemo, she kept calling him that. But since he knew that once Emmy knew her brother had been born she wasn’t going to listen anymore, he also knew that he should tell her about her brother’s real name before he could tell her that he was alive.

“You know, mommy and I talked, and we decided to call the baby Tommy, well, Thomas Robert actually, but we will only call him Tommy. Like your name is actually Emmeline Harper, but we call you Emmy,” Oliver explained.

Emmy looked at him for a moment. Then she started shaking her head. “No. His name is Nemo.”

“No, it is Tommy,” Oliver said calmly.

Again Emmy shook her head. “Nemo.”

Oliver shortly thought about objecting once more, but he knew his daughter. She was stubborn, which was actually one of the first things he had told Tommy about her. And Emmy was persistent which meant that she would definitely preserve this fight longer than Oliver in his tired, exhausted even if happy state would. He needed to switch strategies.

Leaning over to the nightstand, he grabbed his phone and opened the folder with the like one hundred photos he had taken of Tommy in the hours he had spent in the hospital. He scrolled to the photo he loved second most since the one he loved most showed a yawning Tommy which he was sure Emmy wouldn’t like too much because Tommy looked like a little, crumpled monster on it.

Holding out the phone with the picture of little Tommy to Emmy, he said, “See? This is Tommy.”

Emmeline took the phone and looked at the photo without saying anything for a while. First she smiled. Then she perked her lips. A few seconds later she cocked her head and frowned. Although Oliver felt the need to ask her what was going on because this really wasn’t the reaction he had hoped for, he stayed quiet and tried to give her time.

“That’s not Tommy,” Emmy finally said, shaking her head and giving Oliver the phone back.

As soon as he had taken it, Emmy slid from his lap and crawled out of bed, running out of the room. Oliver listened to her steps, too confused about what was going on to say anything. He heard her running down the corridor and the stairs, heard a door downstairs open and furniture being displaced. Then all of that repeated in inverse order, and not even three minutes after Emmy had left, she reentered the bedroom, holding a picture frame in her hands. She crawled back into bed and onto Oliver’s laps before she showed him the picture.

Oliver’s heart stopped beating for a long second.

“That is Tommy,” Emmeline stated.

Oliver looked at the photo of Tommy Merlyn and himself. It was one of the last pictures that had been taken of the two of them together. Shortly after that everything had fallen apart when Tommy had found out that Oliver was the Hood, Oliver had accused Tommy of dealing with drugs and then slept with Laurel. And then Tommy had died.   
The photo had found a permanent place on top of the cabinet in the living room. When he had started to really live from the moment Felicity had moved into Thea’s penthouse with him years ago, it had been placed in their living room – first the living room of the penthouse, then the living room of the house they had bought shortly before their wedding and finally the home they lived in now.

“That is Uncle Tommy,” Emmeline repeated. “Uncle Tommy is not my baby. Nemo is.”

“Of course Uncle Tommy is not the baby from mommy’s tummy. But Baby Tommy has the same name as Uncle Tommy. Do you understand that?”

Emmy looked at him with big eyes for a short moment without doing anything, but then she started shaking her head. Of course she couldn’t understand, Oliver thought, she was not even two-and-a-half years old yet. As much as she understood already there were some things she couldn’t understand yet.

He gently stroked his hand over the soft, curly hair. Maybe she would understand that if she was older. For now she just needed to know that her brother had been born.

“I know the name is a little confusing for you, but your little brother has been born last night. He is out of mommy’s tummy now. And that is why mommy cannot be here tonight. Because she needs to stay in the hospital with Tommy.”

“She’s not coming back?”

A cold shiver ran down his spine, and Oliver had to pinch himself to get rid of the horrible memories of those hours in the last night when he had feared to lose Felicity forever. He had hoped to not have to think about it anytime soon, and he had been sure that spending time with Emmy would help him forget the horror of that night because she didn’t know what had been going on and how close she had been to lose her mother.   
So where did that question come from?

“Of course mommy is coming back,” Oliver answered, rubbing his hands over Emmeline’s back comfortingly. “She will spend a few days away from us, but we will visit her every day. And soon we are going to take her back home with us, both of them – mommy and Tommy.”

Emmy shook her head. “Tommy’s in heaven. You cannot visit heaven. You visit heaven, you must stay there. So mommy’s not coming back? Or are we going to heaven, too?”

“Nobody is going to heaven, Emmy!” Oliver said probably a little too harshly, but the memory of how close he had been to actually lose Felicity to heaven and was never going to see her again, was too present in his heart.

He regretted it immediately. He had never spoken that sternly to Emmeline. Even when she had kidnapped that baby in the supermarket his tone had been softer than when he had snapped at her now. And Emmy reacted just the way it was to be expected given that she thought she had lost her mother and further more had never been snapped at by her father who had never done that before. Her little eyes filled with tears and she started crying bitterly.

“Oh God, I am so sorry, Emmy,” Oliver hurried to say, wrapping his arms around Emmy and holding her close to his chest, rocking her back and forth. “I am so sorry, Emmy. I am so sorry. Everything is alright. Tomorrow we will visit mommy and Tommy an-“

When Tommy’s name made the toddler only cry out more, Oliver decided that maybe it was the best to shut up. He held her tightly, rubbed her back comfortingly and rocked her back and forth until she fell asleep.

That really wasn’t how he had pictured telling Emmy about her baby brother would be going.

 

 

She felt like she should sit up straighter. She felt like she needed to sit up straighter. Felicity really wanted to sit up a little straighter because this half-sitting and half-lying position was weirdly uncomfortable. Carefully she tried to move a little bit, only pulling her legs a little more to herself and putting her feet with the sole to the mattress. It wasn’t too bad. So she moved a little more, putting her hands next to her body on the bed and trying to lift her hips, so she could slide back and sit up straighter.

That was when the pain ripped through her, and with a groaning sound she let herself fall back into the fluffy pillows.

She glanced at her watch, checking for the time and groaned once more. It was only 7 a.m., so it was probably going to take at least two more hours before Oliver and Emmeline would come here. Maybe she should use the time to get some more sleep since the nurse had taken Tommy to the newborn nursery.

But Felicity didn’t feel like sleeping. She had slept so much, and even though she was still tired, she didn’t want to sleep. Closing her eyes, she tried to imagine Emmy’s reaction to her newborn baby brother. She had been so excited all the time that Felicity could hardly see how Emmy would react to finally see and touch Tommy. She was probably going to-

A knock at the door made her open her eyes with a deep sigh before she called, “Come in.”

When the door opened, Felicity’s face immediately enlightened with a smile.

“Mommy!”

Within a second Emmy came running through the room and jumped onto the bed to crawl onto her mother’s lap and wrap her arms around her neck, pressing her face to the crook of her neck. For a short second Felicity stiffened because of the pain, but she breathed out the way she would have done if she had given birth to Tommy naturally, and although it didn’t exactly ease the pain, it still allowed her to wrap her arms around her toddler and hug her.

She remembered that in the time she had fallen or the short second between landing on the ground and losing consciousness she had thought about Emmeline for a split second. And she remembered her fear never to see her daughter again. And the desire to hold Emmy tightly to her that had been present in her heart and soul ever since she had woken up, allowed her to bear the pain.

“Hi, baby,” Felicity whispered.

“Hi, mommy.”

God, how she had missed Emmy! Being apart from her daughter had always been hard, but after a night like that, it had been especially difficult.

“Are you ready to meet Tommy?” Felicity whispered.

“No,” Emmy immediately whispered, pulling back, so she just sat on her mother’s thighs playing with the ugly hospital dress Felicity was still wearing since she didn’t have any of her own clothes here.

“No?” Felicity asked, shooting a glance at Oliver.

He was still standing near to the door, her hospital bag in one hand and another giant bag in his other hand. He had his lips pressed together tightly and was avoiding her gaze. Not a good sign.

“Hey, Emmy, can you be a big girl and please ask a nurse to give you a bottle of water for mommy?” Felicity asked.

Emmy nodded happily. Of course she did! She loved to be a big girl and to do all the things her mommy asked her to do, at least as long as it didn’t include sleeping, putting her toys into her toy trunk or stop doing slightly criminal things to get her brother sooner or get the Arrow to pay her a visit because she really wanted to meet the city’s hero. And she had wanted to meet her little brother. Not anymore it seemed.

As soon as the toddler had jumped out of bed and ran out of the room, Oliver let the bags fall to the floor and approached Felicity. His hands gently framed her face before his lips brushed over hers softly. He sighed into the kiss, and so did Felicity, holding onto his wrists.

“You look tired,” Felicity whispered when Oliver pulled away without letting go of her face.

“The bed feels empty without you.”

“Didn’t you get Emmy to sleep in our bed? She loves having you all to herself.”

“Yeah…” Oliver sighed, letting go of Felicity’s face and looking down. “I think I damaged her.”

“You damaged her?” Felicity laughed, but stopped hastily when her broken ribs as well as the scar from the emergency c-section protested. “How did you think you did that?”

Oliver sighed once more. “I told her about Tommy. But…”

When Oliver didn’t continue, Felicity frowned. Taking his hand into hers, she asked, “But?”

“Well, for Emmy there is only one Tommy and that Tommy is in heaven. So when I told her that her mommy is with Tommy, she immediately believed you were in heaven, too. She kept talking about it and then I snapped. She cried herself to sleep afterwards, and when she she woke up, she immediately climbed out of bed and packed a bag with all her favorite things because, well, visiting you meant not coming back because heaven is a place that once you are there you will have to stay there forever. And she blames all that on Tommy, so she doesn’t really want to meet him anymore. So, yeah, I damaged her.”

Felicity shook her head. “This isn’t your fault. Our daughter is… well, she is Emmy. She has her own logic on things.”

“Yeah, that describes her pretty perfectly.”

“Did you tell her that our Tommy is not… Uncle Tommy?”

“I tried, but she didn’t really get it.”

“She was probably tired after her day with Laurel. How about you go and get Tommy from the newborn nursery, and I will talk to her?”

Oliver nodded, leaning down to kiss her once more. He sighed into the kiss, resting his forehead against Felicity’s when their lips parted.

“Are you okay?” he whispered.

“Pretty much everything hurts,” Felicity answered, “but I’ll be fine. Hey, could you help me to sit up a little straighter? Broken ribs and healing scar from the surgery are kind of annoying.”

Oliver smiled, got up and helped her. He plumped her pillow up and gently laid her back, kissing the tip of her nose. “Better?”

“Much better,” Felicity confirmed.

Just when Oliver was about to lean down and kiss Felicity once more, Emmy reentered the room, carrying a bottle of water with both of her hands. She smiled proudly.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Felicity said, taking the bottle from Emmy and putting it to her nightstand. When the toddler climbed back onto the bed, Felicity shot Oliver a meaningful look over their daughter’s head, and he nodded before leaving the room.

Felicity pulled Emmeline close, so she said high on her thighs, and Felicity could wrap her arms around her daughter without being in too much pain.

“So about your little baby brother,” Felicity started.

Immediately Emmy’s face darkened, and she made a pouty face, crossing her arms in front of her little chest.

“Listen, baby,” Felicity said, stroking her right hand over her daughter’s curly hair. “You know that Uncle Tommy is in heaven, right?”

Emmy nodded.

“And you know how I told you that daddy misses Uncle Tommy very much, right?”

Again the toddler nodded.

“So when mommy and daddy found out that we are having another baby, and that this baby is a baby boy, daddy got a little sad.”

“Why?” Emmy asked.

“Because daddy always thought that Uncle Tommy would be here when a baby boy would join the family, just like daddy always wanted Aunt Thea around when you were born.”

“Why?” Emmy asked again.

“Because sometimes girls need other girls than their mommy to talk to, and boys need other boys than their daddy to talk to. Do you understand that?”

Emmy nodded, then said, “Is daddy still sad?”

“No,” Felicity answered, smiling mildly, “because when mommy saw how sad daddy was, she asked him what would make him happy again.”

“Chocolate?” Emmy asked.

“No, chocolate wasn’t enough.”

“Hugs and kisses?”

“That helped a little, but it still wasn’t enough,” Felicity replied, her smile widening. “No, what daddy really needed was Tommy.”

“Uncle Tommy?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes.”

“But Uncle Tommy’s in heaven, and you cannot visit heaven. You have to stay if you do.”

“Right,” Felicity answered, “but when your little baby brother shares the name with Uncle Tommy than maybe daddy won’t miss him so much. You know, Uncle Tommy is watching us from heaven, and he can see that our baby here on earth is named Tommy, too, and that makes Uncle Tommy happy. And when Uncle Tommy is happy, daddy is happy.”

“I’m happy when daddy’s happy,” Emmeline said seriously.

“So you are happy to meet your little baby brother?” Felicity asked and was more than relieved then Emmy nodded with a bright smile.

Felicity pulled her toddler closer and kissed her face over and over again until she heard the door being opened.

“Look, there he is,” Felicity whispered. Emmy turned around, so her back was leaning slightly against her mother’s chest now. She didn’t rest her weight back completely, though, which Felicity was more than grateful for because her broken ribs and the scar hurt more and more.

Emmy looked back at her mother shyly when Oliver came closer. She giggled nervously when Felicity spread her daughter’s legs a little, so Oliver could put Tommy in between the toddler’s and on top of her mother’s legs. While Emmeline took in her baby brother, Felicity and Oliver looked at each other, and Felicity winked at him, wordlessly telling him that everything was okay. He thanked her with a short kiss to her lips before he sat down at the edge of the mattress, and both of them watched their daughter as she was taking in the sight of her newborn brother.

She looked at her parents again, her hands playing nervously with one another like she didn’t know what to do with them but to touch her brother, but seemed too scared to actually do it.

“Well, that is your little brother, Emmy,” Felicity said, gently stroking over Tommy’s little head to show Emmy that it was okay to touch him.

“He’s so tiny,” Emmy whispered.

She hesitated shortly. Then she gripped Oliver’s hand to reassure herself that he was there before she slowly leaned down and kissed her brother’s forehead. Tommy made a quiet sound like he was about to wake up, but Emmy moved the tips of her fingers over her brother’s cheek, and immediately the little boy was quiet again.

“He’s cute,” she said. “Do we keep him?”

Oliver and Felicity chuckled.

“Of course we will keep him,” Oliver answered. “He is part of the family.”

“We do not have to give him back?”

“No,” Oliver answered. “He is all ours.”

“All mine?” Emmy asked.

“No, all ours,” Oliver answered, gesturing between Felicity, Emmy and himself.

“No, he’s mine,” Emmy said, leaning down and resting her head on Tommy’s tummy, taking of his tiny hands in hers possessively.

“No, he is ours. You will share the baby with us,” Oliver said and frowned at the way it sounded like Tommy actually was Emmy’s baby.

“You don’t share.”

“I don’t share?”

“You don’t share mommy.”

“I share mommy with you and Tommy.”

“But you don’t want mommy to have a boyfriend. So you don’t share her.”

Oliver opened his mouth to say something, but shut it again helplessly. Felicity pressed her lips together tightly to not laugh at the dumb expression in her husband’s face. It took a few seconds before he answered, “Mommy doesn’t need a boyfriend because she has daddy.”

“Leo’s mommy has both, daddy and boyfriend.”

“Well, mommy has daddy, and that is enough for mommy.”

Emmeline turned her head to her mom. “Really?”

Felicity put on a mocking face, but smiled when she saw Oliver’s face. “Daddy is more than enough for mommy.”

“So you don’t need Tommy?” she asked hopefully.

Why in God’s name had that child inherited her genius, Felicity thought.

“Tommy is our baby,” Felicity said, gesturing to Oliver, Emmy and herself like Oliver had done it before.

“Can’t you have your own baby?” Emmy asked whiningly, kissing her brother’s tummy.

Smiling, Oliver and Felicity both leaned down and kissed the sides of their daughter’s head. Their eyes looked over the crown of Emmy’s head and their hands entwined on the mattress.

For Emmy heaven was a place you couldn’t visit because once you were there, you had to stay forever. For Felicity and Oliver heaven was this moment.

“Mommy?”

“Hm?”

“Can we call the next baby Nemo?”


	80. Priorities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Accidently uploaded this in the wrong fic first. :D  
> I hope nobody saw. :D

“Mr. Queen, is it true that you paid a six-figure sum to buy a kidney for your wife since she needed a transplant after her fall down the stairs during the gala five days ago?”

“Is it true that your wife has an affair with the Flash and that is the reason why he came to Starling City to take her to the hospital?”

“We’ve heard that there is a paternity test being run on the baby. Can you confirm that?”

Oliver did his best to not roll his eyes at the frenzy of flashing lights and the stupid questions that hailed down on them while they were pushing through the mob of pushy reporters to get to the hospital entrance. Where did they receive that stupid information from? Neither had Felicity needed a kidney transplantation, nor had she an affair with Barry, nor were they running a paternity test on Tommy because if he doubted the paternity, one look in those piercing blue eyes and there would be no doubt in who was the baby boy’s father.

He focused all of his attention on the reporters, less on the dumb questions and more on their movements, though. He didn’t want anyone of them to get to close to him, especially since John followed right beside him with Emmy on his arms. The toddler was scared of the mob of reporters since one of them had held his camera right into her face yesterday, blinding her by taking a photo with a glaring flashlight.

Since Felicity had been taken to the hospital five days ago after falling down the stairs, more and more reporters had come together in front of the hospital doors, trying to get photos of Oliver and his family and answers to their questions. Oliver couldn’t stop them from taking photos, but he was continuing to ignore their questions for as long as possible, no matter how often Thea and his other campaign consultants were going to tell him that he needed to call at least a short press conference.

All Oliver wanted was being close to Felicity, who was still recovering from the fall and the emergency c-section that had followed. He wanted to hold his tiny son in his arms and spend the entire day watching Emmeline taking care of him like Tommy was her most precious treasure. He just didn’t care about what the media wrote or said about him. He and Felicity and their friends and family knew the truth about everything that had happened.

“Mr. Queen, first your sister got kidnapped while your mother was running for mayor, now your wife falls down the stairs in the midst of your candidacy. Is it part of the Queen family’s campaign strategy to call attention on your private life by getting family members in mortal danger?”

Oliver stopped dead in his tracks, turning around and glaring at the reporter who had asked that question. He saw red. Until now he had ignored every stupid, offending question he had been asked, but this was too much for him to be mute about because being accused of using Felicity’s accident for his political career was something he couldn’t just let go of, especially since he hadn’t said any word about it. He hadn’t tried to earn him pity by telling how scared he had been when he had feared that he would lose his wife and his son. He hadn’t told how close he had actually been to losing them and how panicked Felicity had reacted when she had woken up after the surgery and not seen their son immediately.

His hands tightened to fists at his sides before his feet started moving. The guy who had asked the question gulped at the dark expression in Oliver’s eyes and shrank more and more with every step Oliver took towards him. Ignoring the flashlights and the clicking of the cameras, Oliver grabbed the lapels of the guy’s leather jacket and pulled him towards him. He could see the fear in the reporter’s eyes. The guy better should be scared. How did he dare to make a suggestion like that?

“Listen, you little dickhead,” Oliver started, ignoring how John said his name in a warning tone, “if you want me to crush your face and beat the crap out of you until there isn’t more left of you then a puddle of-“

“Daddy!”

His daughter’s voice snapped him out of his blind rage. His right hand was prickling with the need to put his threat into action. He wanted to punch that guy until his face was unrecognizable and he wouldn’t be able to form any more stupid word. But Emmy’s presence made it impossible for him to act like that. He wouldn’t scare his daughter to death, not because of such a douche bag.

“If I see you here again, I swear to God you will regret it,” Oliver whispered dangerously quietly before he pushed the reporter away strongly. He fell to the floor, looking up at Oliver with wide eyes.

Oliver turned around to John, reaching out his arms and taking Emmeline from him. The little girl put her short arms around his neck, pressing her tiny body close to his broad chest, and Oliver pressed her against him tightly. He lowered his lips to her head to press a kiss to her temple and then whisper into her ear, “Sorry, sweetie, everything is alright. You don’t have to be scared anymore. We will go to see mommy and Tommy now, okay?”

She had her face burrowed into the crook of his neck to avoid the flashlights of the cameras, so he couldn’t see her face, but he felt her nodding against his neck in agreement and rubbed her back comfortingly. During the elevator ride upstairs Oliver felt John’s gaze on him, but he ignored it, keeping all his focus on Emmy instead. Although they were safe from the reporters and their annoying questions and flashlights, the little girl still held onto him tightly, so Oliver kept rubbing her back and whispering words of comfort into her ear.

It wasn’t until they arrived upstairs that Emmy loosened the tight grip on him and wiggled in his arms until he let her down on the floor. She immediately grabbed his hand, though, searching the comforting and ensuring contact to him. While they were walking through the corridors in silence, Emmy pressed herself close to his leg, seeking more safety. Oliver knew that his daughter wasn’t going to let the little incident that had happened yesterday shake her permanently, but he was still angry that it had even come this far. Emmy had never been that scared of anything before.

He lightly knocked at the door to Felicity’s room, waited until she called them in and then opened the door. As soon as Emmeline spotted her mother, she let go of his hand to run to where Felicity was sitting in bed and climbed into bed, hugging her tightly.

“Hi, baby!” Felicity laughed, hugging her daughter back and pressing a kiss to her hair before she snuggled her cheek to the crown of her head.

“Mommy, when are you coming home?” Emmy asked, leaning back to look at her mother.

“I talked to the doctor today, and he said that I have to sleep here three more times. And then I can go home.”

“Can you sleep now? So you can come home sooner?”

“Awww,” Felicity made with a gentle smile, pulling Emmy closer again. She shot a glance at Oliver when she said, “I thought you were having fun all alone with daddy.”

Oliver, who had watched the reuniting scene of mother and daughter from the door, came closer now, kissed Felicity shortly and whispered, “She’s scared of the reporters in front of the hospital.”

He hadn’t told Felicity anything about what had happened yesterday. He had taken his time, comforting Emmeline and drying her tears before he had come up here to see Felicity. She had enough on her plate as it was already. She needed rest to recover, and worrying about Emmy’s wellbeing wouldn’t help with that. So when she looked at him in question now, wondering why her daughter was suddenly scared of reporters when she had always wrapped them around her little finger like she was a media expert, Oliver just shrugged his shoulder and waved it off.

“Maybe it is time for a press conference,” John said from the door. “Once you feed them at least some information, they might let go of it.”

Oliver tensed. He didn’t know how often he had heard that he needed to give a press conference and tell the world some details of what had happened after Barry had taken Felicity into the hospital. But a press conference was going to take time, time to prepare and time to do it, time that he’d rather spend with his wife and kids.

“I don’t think that is necessary,” he responded, feeling Felicity’s gaze on his skin, but he couldn’t get himself to look at her right now.

“Emmy, do you want to take Uncle John to Tommy?” Felicity asked.

The toddler nodded and crawled off the bed. She went over to John, taking his hand and leading him out of the room. Before the door closed behind them, Oliver could hear her say to John, “You can hold him. But he is tiny. So you need to be careful. Especially with his head.”

He smiled at the words and looked up to Felicity to find that she was looking back at him, but unlike him she wasn’t smiling. With a sigh she tapped on the edge of the mattress, gesturing him to sit down there which he did immediately. She took his hands in hers, cocking her head.

“I know that I need to give a press conference,” he said before she got the chance to say anything. “It’s just that I’d rather spend my time here with Emmy, Tommy and you. But I know it is important for the campaign, so-“

“So you will give a press conference and say what?” Felicity interrupted him.

“I will tell them that it looked bad for a few hours, but that everything is alright now because Tommy and you are healthy. So I will need a little more time to concentrate on the changes in my private life, but it shouldn’t take longer than a week. Then I will go back to concentrating on my mayoral campaign.”

“Why?” Felicity asked in a whisper.

Oliver frowned. “Why what?”

“Why would you go back to concentrating on your mayoral campaign,” Felicity asked, “when you don’t want to be mayor?”

Oliver gulped. He had known that she had suspected something since he had said that a lot of people were more exciting about him becoming mayor than he was. He had kind of hoped that the comment would get lost in all the trouble that had started shortly after. Obviously he had been wrong about it.

“Look, it is not that I don’t want to be mayor,” Oliver explained. “There certainly are other things I’d rather do with my life than that, but-“

“No buts, Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him, squeezing his hands. “If you didn’t want to be mayor, then why did you agree to it?”

Oliver thought back to the evening he had come home to find Thea and Felicity planning out how they would manage all their duties – Queen Consolidated, the kids, Arrow – if Oliver became mayor. He had said he wouldn’t do it because with his family growing and their jobs and everything, he would miss too much time that he could spend with his family instead. But then Felicity had convinced him to think about it, and that had lead to Thea stating-

“What wifey says hubby does,” Oliver mumbled.

He saw Felicity’s jaw drop and her eyes widen. Before he got the chance to say anything, Felicity pulled the pillow away from behind her head and pressed it to her face, whining into the pillow, “I’m a tyrant!”

Oliver chuckled and lifted his hands to the pillow to take it away from her face, but Felicity held onto the fabric strongly.

“Come on, Felicity, you are not a tyrant.”

“I am!” she whined into the pillow. “I am making my husband do things he doesn’t want to! Big, life changing things! I am a tyrant! A terrible tyrant!”

“At most a petty tyrant,” Oliver laughed. “Come on, Felicity, take the pillow away. You didn’t force me to do anything. I wouldn’t have done it if I hadn’t had my reasons.”

“Yeah, your reasons were that you didn’t want to mess with your domestic tyrant!”

Oliver chuckled again, replying, “No, my reasons were that I wanted you to be proud of me.”

He smiled lovingly when Felicity lowered the pillow from her face to look at him sadly. He reached out his hand and tugged a strand of her golden hair behind her ear.

“Really?” she asked.

Oliver nodded. “Really.”

He had expected a lot of different reactions beginning with a loving smile up to a passionate kiss that unfortunately couldn’t end in a hot make out session since they couldn’t have sex with Felicity having born their baby boy only a few days ago. What he hadn’t expected, though, was that she would hit the pillow into his face firmly.

“Oliver Jonas Queen!” she said. “What the hell were you thinking?”

When she tried to hit the pillow in his face again, he hastily took it from her, keeping it out of her reach.

“What’s wrong with trying to make the person you love most proud?” Oliver asked confusedly.

“There is nothing wrong with _that_ ,” Felicity replied. “Wrong is that you seem to believe that you need to become mayor to make me proud, though.”

Oliver pressed his lips together, thinking about what to say. But before he could have found anything to say now, Felicity grabbed his bicep, using her hold on him to pull herself upright and slid her arms around his neck. She kissed him. Her lips were gently brushing against his before they pressed down more firmly. Her tongue opened his lips to her, and she licked into his mouth gently. Her tongue caressed his, and Oliver sighed into the kiss. When their lips parted, Felicity’s hands slid from the back of his neck to his cheeks, framing his face. Her forehead rested against his, so he could feel her breath ghosting over his face.

“Oliver, I am proud of you,” she explained softly. “Look how much you’ve grown since we met. There were times that you have been pushing everyone away, thinking you couldn’t have anybody close to you. And now? You are a great husband and a wonderful father. And I should probably say it more often, but I never thought that you would have doubts about it. I am so proud of you. I just thought you knew that.”

Putting his hands to her wrists, he sighed and turned his head first to the right and then to the left side, pressing kisses into both of her palms.

“I know that,” Oliver explained quietly. “I just… I don’t know.”

When Felicity’s fingertips stroked over the stubble of his cheeks, he sighed once again, leaning into the caressing touches. Only when Felicity pulled away, so her forehead didn’t rest against his any longer, Oliver opened his eyes to look at her.

“Listen, Oliver,” she started, her hands resting against his cheeks more firmly now again. “I need to know what you really want. You. Not me, not anybody else. You. So we can plan on how we make that happen.”

“Is this just about the mayoral campaign?” he asked.

“No. This is about everything.”

“My job at QC?”

“For example.”

“The Arrow?”

Felicity leaned forward, capturing his lips with hers shortly before she answered, “This is about everything you want and don’t want to do in your life, Oliver.”

He nodded. There were things he wanted to change. There were certain dreams he had about how he wanted to spend the next years of their shared life. He just wasn’t sure if he wanted it because he really wanted it or if he wanted it because he wanted to flee from certain memories that were connected to things he did now.

When Felicity looked at him expectantly, he asked, “Do I have to make all of these decisions now?”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head and kissing him once more. Then she said, “No, of course not. Just think about it, and tell me when you have decided. And in case my brain isn’t working properly then and I will say stupid things that will make it sound like I am not accepting your decisions, you just… I don’t know… put an arrow in me or you hit me or you yell at me… or something.”

Oliver perked his eyebrow. “I would never put an arrow in you. Or hit you. Or yell at you.”

“Then you find some other way to make sure I get what you are saying,” Felicity replied gently. “Oliver, I am so sorry for not listening to what you want.”

Oliver shook his head. “I should have been clearer about what I wanted.”

Felicity rested her forehead back against his and massaged the back of his neck with her fingers gently. They stayed in that comfortable silence for a while. Then Felicity pulled back.

“What’s going on with Emmy’s and the reporters?”

“Yesterday one of those douche bags held his camera right into her face and scared her to death,” Oliver explained. “And today I might have almost beaten one of them in front of her eyes.”

“What did he do?” Felicity asked. “The second one I mean?”

“He asked whether it was part of the campaign strategy to call attention on me by risking your life because it seems to be a strange coincident that this happened during my campaign when Thea was kidnapped during my mother’s.”

Felicity perked her eyebrow. “Did you hit him?”

“I would have, but Emmy was right behind me, and I didn’t want her to see.”

“That lucky bastard,” Felicity growled making Oliver chuckle.

He watched her for a long moment. She looked tired which didn’t really surprise him since he knew that she couldn’t sleep because the suture of the c-section hurt a little, and her broken ribs made it almost impossible for her to find a comfortable position to lie in. Still she was so beautiful. She smiled at him with that special smile that was saved for only him.

“Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“I don’t want to be mayor.”

She chuckled. “I know. So set a press conference and renounce your candidature.”

Oliver nodded, but then frowned and shook his head. “No, I think that will take too long. I will… Wait here a second. I’ll be back.”

He pressed a short kiss to her lips and then left without saying another word. Felicity frowned, her gaze following him to the door. When it closed behind him, Felicity hastily grabbed the remote from the nightstand and switched on the local news in TV, knowing exactly what Oliver was about to do to reduce the time he needed to spend with the end of his political career.

It didn’t take long before the anchor woman interrupted the current report to broadcast live the unplanned press conference Oliver was giving. He was standing in front of the door to the main entrance to the hospital. The reporters seemed to have built a semicircle around him. A bunch of microphones were placed in his face to hear what he would say.

“The last weeks,” he started, “I have done my best to convince the people in this city that I have grown from the spoilt, little boy I was before to a responsible man who is able to help this city out of the dark times back into the light. I wanted to help this city to get back to the greatness it had shown years ago. I was willing to put myself and my family into risk to take this position.”

Felicity nodded to herself. Being mayor of Starling City wasn’t exactly the safest job. And still Oliver had agreed to do it. After she had forced him to, she though with a sigh. Bad wifey!

“I had hoped to have the city’s support if anything happens to me or my family. A few days ago I was close to losing my wife and my child, and almost all I got were accusations. With the media leading the way I was accused of willingly risking my wife’s and our baby’s health to promote my political career, my wife was accused of cheating on me which makes me even angrier than the first accusation. And you scared my baby girl which is probably the worst of all you did the last days.”

Felicity took the pillow from where Oliver had put it to the end of the bed and put it back behind her head with a sigh. She was sure that there were a lot of people, who would have supported Oliver even in this, but the voice of the media was so loud sometimes, it drowned out all the supporting voice.

“I love this city,” Oliver continued. “I would do a lot for it, probably more than most of you know. But I am a husband and a father, and that means that I need to set priorities. My priority is my family. So I am renouncing my candidature with this. I hope you’ll understand.”

He turned around and had already taken the first steps away from the reporters when he stood still and turned around once more, adding, “I know nobody asked, but in case someone is interested, my wife is okay, and she gave birth to the most perfect baby boy that has ever been born. His name is Thomas Robert Queen. Thank you.”

Felicity smiled proudly, pressing the remote to her chest.

She didn’t know why Oliver hadn’t considered that she would be proud of him even if he didn’t become mayor. But she would do her best to make sure that he would never doubt how proud she was of him again. So when Oliver reentered the room she spread her arms with a smile she hoped would show her pride and let him snuggle up to her. When his head rested against her chest right over her heart, she stroked over his hair, whispering, “I am so proud of you.”

Oliver hummed contently, almost about to fall asleep. She knew that he had trouble sleeping when she wasn’t right beside him in bed. Emmy was probably still occupying her place in bed, so at least he wasn’t completely alone. For Felicity it wasn’t exactly easy to sleep without him, either. So she snuggled her cheek to the crown of his head and closed her eyes, too.

Just when Felicity felt herself slowly drifting off into sleep, the anchor woman on the news that she hadn’t switched off stated, “Queen is probably more than happy about the birth of his second child, son and heir to the family, after the first child turned out to be a girl and-“

“Okay, that’s it. I am going to kill them,” Oliver said, moving to get out of the bed, but Felicity held him to her tightly.

“Ignore them. They are just idiots,” she stated, pressing his head to her chest until it stayed there without resistance.

“Can I go and threaten them as Arrow?” he asked after a while.

“No,” Felicity replied firmly.

“I take back what I said before. You really are a tyrant.”

Felicity chuckled, pressing a kiss to the crown of his head.

“You love it.”

Oliver’s hold on her waist tightened. “I love _you_.”

Felicity sighed, moving her hand through his short hair and snuggling closer to him. She knew she was about to fall asleep when the warmth of Oliver’s body made her feel more comfortable than she had felt in the last days. “I love you, too.”

 


	81. If it makes you feel better

“Guess who’s going home today?” Felicity asked, earning her a low sound from Tommy who was safely sleeping in her arms, wrapped up in a baby blue blanket. She was walking up and down in the hospital room, unable to stay in bed any longer. She knew that she should probably use the few minutes she had left here to rest before she would go home and had to find a new rhythm now that she didn’t only have her toddler to take care of, but also the tiny human being in her arms. “We just wait for daddy and Emmy to come here and pick us up. You will love your nursery. Emmy has put a lot of work into it, and she had drawn you a thousand pictures. She can’t wait for you to come home and-”

A light knock at the door interrupted her whispers for a short moment.

“Is that daddy?” she whispered to Tommy, who opened his eyes slightly without really waking up, before she called, “Come in.”

The door opened, and Quentin Lance stuck his head in the room, asking, “Hi, did I come at a bad timing?”

“No, come in,” Felicity said with a smile. “You are lucky you met me here. Oliver will come any second to take us home.”

“Already?” he asked, stepping in and closing the door behind him.

“Hey, I’ve been here for eight days. It feels like an eternity,” she said. “It is past time for me to finally go home.”

Quentin approached her, put a hand to her upper arm and kissed her cheek gently, careful not to disturb the sleeping baby in her arms. When he looked down at Tommy, he smiled softly.

“He looks perfect,” he said.

“He is perfect,” Felicity said, “Here, you can hold him.”

“Oh, I don’t know if-“ Quentin started to articulate doubts, but Felicity had put Tommy already into his arms.

She didn’t know why, but most people seemed a little bit afraid of holding someone so tiny in their arms like they were afraid to break them. Given that Tommy had survived her fall down the stairs, he seemed kind of unbreakable to Felicity, though. It took only a short second before Quentin adjusted to the feeling of the small human being in his arms and pulled Tommy closer, so he was resting against his chest safely. “I don’t know when the last time I held someone so small in my arms was. It’s amazing.”

Felicity smiled, watching her mother’s boyfriend holding her son in his arms and smiling down at him with love. She knew that Quentin had had a major influence on her and Oliver’s and hence Tommy’s life a few months ago when she and Oliver had been at a rough patch due to her prenatal depression. He had been the one who had helped Oliver to hold onto hope and not give up on their marriage when she had been driving him more and more away from her. He had had such a great impact on their and Tommy’s life back then that Oliver had even suggested that Quentin should become Tommy’s godfather.

“You know, we originally planned to make you his godfather,” Felicity stated. When Quentin looked up at her surprised, Felicity smiled softly. “You helped Oliver during my depression, so it seemed to be a nice gesture. With what happened lately, we decided to ask Barry, though. Well, I suggested renaming Tommy and giving him the middle name Bartholomew, but let’s just saying Oliver wasn’t too fond of that idea. Taking in consideration that Tommy bears Oliver’s dad’s name, I actually get why he didn’t want to change it. I hope you understand.”

Quentin smiled. “Of course I understand. Although I have to admit that I guess your husband’s problem with renaming your son was more related to the fact that you dated that Allen kid a while ago.”

“You know?”

“I’m your mother’s boyfriend. I know everything,” he replied with a chuckle, “I think he will be a great godparent, though. Besides, I just got promoted by your daughter. I am not ‘Quentin’ anymore. I am ‘grandpa’ now. I think I can live with that position.”

Felicity smiled happily when Quentin lowered his gaze to Tommy again. With Oliver’s parents being dead, her dad being out of the picture and her mother living in Las Vegas, Felicity was happy that her kids still had a grandparent here. Emmy had obviously locked Quentin in her heart. And since Oliver’s relationship to him had gotten better during her depression, Quentin seemed to have finally become a real part of her family.

“You know, I actually wanted to come here earlier to congratulate you and check if you are alright,” Quentin said, looking at her gloomily. “But I had a doctor’s appointment, and he told me some bad news.”

Felicity frowned, stepping a little closer and putting her hand on his forearm. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, yes, it’s not… that bad,” Quentin said hastily. “He just said that I should take a few weeks off, get some rest to not trigger another heart attack. And he asked me to take more care of my health because right now it looks like I could have another heart attack any day, so he suggested that I should find someone who can… you know… keep an eye on me in case something happens, especially during the days. And since Laurel needs to work most of the days, I thought maybe I could… spend my days with you for a while?”

Felicity looked at him without blinking. She knew that Quentin still had to go to the doctor regularly to check on his heart. And she knew that his job was something that his doctor told him over and over again to quit if he wanted to have a long, healthy life. But Felicity also knew that Quentin was stubborn as hell about his job. He refused to quit or to retire or to even take it easy. Felicity knew because Laurel had more than once said that she worried about him.

It seemed a little bit suspicious that he had decided to take some time off now. And it was even more suspicious that he asked her to take care of him. Quentin wasn’t exactly one to be willing to be babied.

Cocking her head, she said, “Oliver wants you to babysit me, right?”

“Yeah,” Quentin replied without hesitation, not even trying to lie to her.

Felicity opened her mouth to say something about the fact that she didn’t need anybody to watch out for her because she was fine and the fall hadn’t left any too bad injuries. Besides, in the next days she would probably never be alone since most of their friends had already announced to come visit her again as soon as she and Tommy were home. But Quentin was faster.

“Listen, Felicity,” he said with a gentle smile. “I know that you feel fine and my presence is probably completely redundant, but Oliver would feel more comfortable if you weren’t alone. He is worrying about you, so I think my presence in your home for the next few weeks is more important for his wellbeing than for yours. So I understand that you don’t really need me with you all day, but maybe you could consider it nonetheless. For Oliver.”

Felicity knew that Oliver was protective of her. He loved her, and he worried about her. She got that. She got where it was coming from and why he was probably more worried and more protective than other husbands were. And she actually liked Quentin, so having him around more often was probably not that bad. She could kind of catch up on all the time she had missed with her own dad and build a relationship with who she hoped might become her legal stepfather one day.

On the other hand… she couldn’t really tell, but… it seemed odd. Those first weeks were meant to find a new rhythm. How was she supposed to do that if she didn’t come home to her new everyday life but to a - because of the permanent house guest - falsified everyday life?

Before she got to say anything, though, there was another light knock at the door, and soon as Felicity had called “Come in” a cheerful Emmy was running to her and hugged her mother’s legs, snuggling her head to her thigh.

“You’re coming back home today, mommy!” Emmy stated.

“I know,” Felicity laughed, stroking her hands over her daughter’s blonde hair. “But that means you will have to sleep in your own bed from now on again because mommy is taking her side in the bed again.”

“Can I sleep in Tommy’s bed?” she asked.

Felicity scrunched her nose. “I don’t think that would do either of you any good, sweetie.”

Emmy pushed her bottom lip forward, pouting slightly, but it didn’t take long. As soon as Tommy made the lowest sound, she turned around to Quentin. “Hi, grandpa.”

“Hi, Emmy,” Quentin replied.

While Emmy climbed on the bed, so she could lean against Quentin’s side and look at her baby brother, Oliver stepped closer. He put an arm around Felicity’s waist and kissed her on the cheek shortly. He then turned to Quentin with a friendly smile.

“Quentin, what a nice surprise,” he said. “I guess you are visiting Felicity and taking a look at the newest family addition.”

Felicity bit her cheek, narrowing her eyes slightly. If she didn’t know that he was lying, she wondered whether she would fall for it. She had to admit that there had been times when he had lied less convincingly.

“Actually I asked Felicity whether I could stay with her for a while because my doctor said I should live a little more carefully for a while,” Quentin explained like it wasn’t a story Oliver had fabricated himself. “I won’t disturb your family life much. It would actually only be during the days, so as soon as you are home, I will go home and leave you four to privacy, so you can adjust to the new changes in your life.”

Oliver nodded. “Of course you can stay at our place for that time. You are family now. Right, Felicity?”

He looked at her with a soft smile. Felicity shot a glance to Quentin who looked at her encouragingly. What was she supposed to do? Quentin was right. Oliver needed this for his well-being, so if it made him happy, fine.

“Sure,” she said to Quentin. “You are always welcome in our home. Like Oliver said you are family now.”

When Oliver lowered his lips to the crown of Felicity’s head, kissing her shortly, Felicity winked at Quentin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A rather short chapter since the idea sounded a lot better in my head then when I wrote it. The next chapter will hopefully make it up. :)
> 
> For anyone who hasn't read it on tumblr:  
> The next four chapters will be posted on the next four Sundays as Advent gifts.  
> Chapter 82: SUPERSISTER - A Tommy&Emmy focused fic  
> Chapter 83: THE PAST, THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE - big changes will be revealed  
> Chapter 84: DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL - a Emmy&Oliver centric fic  
> Chapter 85: BODY ISSUES - emotional smut
> 
> I hope they will all be posted in time since my plan (it includes 10 fics for four weeks) might be a little to ambitious...


	82. Supersister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s the first of my little Advent gifts to everyone who is reading the story. 
> 
> Picture source: http://40.media.tumblr.com/9d01488bac24161c1553679e0eb05cfd/tumblr_nwuy9el3T91te7ibqo1_500.jpg

“Please!”

“No!”

“Emmy, please!”

“No!”

“Come on, Emmy, please, please, please!” Barry pleaded with her.

But the toddler shook her head stubbornly and crossed her little arms in front of her tiny chest, looking at Barry with a dark expression in her face. “No!”

“Emmy, be nice or you will have to go to bed without a bedtime story tonight.”

“But, mommy! He sneezed!”

“Yes, Felicity, he sneezed!” Oliver consented with a firm nod of his head and an amused grin, winking at their daughter.

Felicity shot him an angry glare, slapping his chest lightly. Of course he supporter her, she thought. Even though he and Barry were friends, Oliver still hadn’t forgotten that Barry’s special relationship to Felicity could have easily ended in more. Most of the time he behaved around Barry, especially since most of his jealousy was saved for Ray, who had gotten the why-is-he-allowed-.to-hold-the-baby-in-the-first-place glare from Emmeline when he had visited yesterday, but of course Oliver would still use an opportunity like this to… misbehave a little. “Could you please not encourage her, Oliver? She is overexcited as she is already.”

“Come on, she is just being cute,” Oliver said with a smile, wrapped an arm around Felicity’s waist from behind and kissed the underside of her jaw. “We are lucky she loves her little brother that much. Just imagine what we would have to put up with when she couldn’t adjust to the new situation.”

Sighing, Felicity snuggled her cheek to the top of Oliver’s head and slid closer to him as far as moving closer was even possible since she was already sitting on his lap with her arms wrapped around his neck and his wrapped around her waist. Oliver war probably right that Emmy hating that her brother was getting a lot of the attention that was normally saved for her would be a lot worse than her deeply caring behavior now. Still Felicity didn’t feel comfortable to have their toddler react like that in front of all their friends, no matter how amused everyone seemed to be. Or at least everyone but Barry, who wasn’t allowed to come close to his godson since according to Emmy his sneeze could be a sign for a sickness he could infect Tommy with, and Felicity, who knew that Emmy was just overexcited because everyone was here to see Tommy and she as the proudest big sister in the world tried to make everything right but still she felt like the toddler should calm down a little.

“Emmy, come here now please,” Felicity said strictly.

Emmeline looked at her shortly, looked back at Barry and then hastily stepped away from him, running to Laurel and climbing on her lap. She whispered for everyone present audibly into Laurel’s ear, “Oh-oh, mommy soon talks in her loud voice.”

John and Oliver both chuckled, and again Felicity slapped Oliver’s shoulder.

“Hey, John laughed, too!” he complained.

“Yeah, guess what, he is not married to me.”

“Luckily,” Oliver whispered and pressed a kiss to the soft skin right under her ear.

Felicity snuggled her cheek back to the crown of Oliver’s head. Her left hand started playing with the hair at the back of his neck while she was looking around in their living room where they sat together with almost all of their friends. Oliver and she sat snuggled up to one another in one of the armchairs. Lyla sat with Sara in her lap in a second armchair, John on the armrest. Thea and Roy shared the third armchair. Laurel sat at the edge of the couch, Emmy sitting on her lap, watching Iris closely since she held her baby brother in her arms. Caitlin sat to Iris’ other side, playing with one of Tommy’s little feet. Cisco and Barry sat at the other side of the couch. Ronnie and Quentin had carried chairs from the couch to the living room.

It was great that lately they more often met for happy reasons than for sad ones. The number of private moments had increased since there were married and unmarried couples now and kids who wanted great birthday parties with everyone present. At the same time the number of Arrow and Flash related meetings had decreased. Luckily, one should add.

“Tommy lost his sock,” Emmy said, bending down until she could reach the fabric and held it out to Laurel, “Pretty bird, you gotta put it back on. He’s getting cold.”

Since a visit to the zoo two and a half weeks ago Emmy was calling Laurel ‘pretty bird’, and it was already infecting everyone else. Or at least Felicity, Thea and the other women present. And Cisco. Cisco loved the name. Oliver only rolled his eyes every time he heard it. He just wasn’t that much into pet names, especially not in the field.

“Okay, can I hold him now?” Caitlin asked.

“You gotta be careful with his head,” Emmy explained when Iris put Tommy into Caitlin’s arm.

Emmy had told that to everybody who had wanted to hold him in the last days. When she had first seen her baby brother, she had been a little scared of touching him since he was so tiny. But once she had started to touch him and kiss him and cuddle him, she had barely been able to stop. Then she had wanted to hold him, and Oliver and Felicity had helped her to do so, so he had lain in Emmy’s arms, but Oliver had held most of his weight. They had emphasized that she needed to be careful to support his head, and that was what she told everybody who wanted to hold him now.

“I think Emmy is already the best big sister in the world,” John said while Emmy slid from Laurel’s to Iris lap, so she could stay close to her brother, “although she has probably thought she could keep her parents to herself for another month.”

Oliver snorted. “If Tommy hadn’t been born until his due date, I fear the crime rate in Starling City would have increased a lot.”

Everybody looked at Oliver, frowning confusedly. Only Felicity knew the meaning of that comment and smiled softly before she turned her head to breathe in the scent of Oliver’s hair and press a kiss to his scalp. She then snuggled her cheek back to the crown of his head and closed her eyes.

“That’s your story to tell,” she yawned. Having a newborn to take care of was very exhausting, especially since their son seemed to be quite unhappy about his presence on earth. He cried a lot, especially in the late hours of the day and the night, giving his parents only few hours to sleep.

Not opening her eyes since because of that she was unbelievably tired, she listened to Oliver’s soft voice telling the story of how their toddler had kidnapped a baby in the supermarket. Emmy had been convinced that that had to be their baby because it had been a warm day and her parents had told her that the baby was coming when it would be warm. Luckily, Oliver had been able to charm his way out of the whole thing. Otherwise they would have been in a really uncomfortable situation, and it had been embarrassing enough as it had been.

When Oliver had finished telling the story, nobody said a word. Felicity slowly opened her eyes, wondering if she had fallen asleep and everybody had left in the meantime and she just hadn’t realized it. But everybody was still there, sitting unmoving where they had been sitting all the time. They watched Oliver with wide eyes and opened lips.

“He’s serious,” Felicity whispered, knowing that they needed the confirmation since she herself had needed it when Oliver had told her about it.

“She kidnapped a baby?” Lyla asked.

“In the midst of the day?” Thea added.

“And there was no media circus about it?” Iris wondered.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “She is cute. People just can’t be mad at her for long.”

“Very true,” Felicity said with a nod.

It was quiet for a moment longer. Then John burst out in loud laughter until tears were forming in his eyes. And given how he held his stomach, his muscles were probably protesting at the movements because even the most trained guy couldn’t stand a bout of laughter like that without pain.

“Just imagine this sweet little child telling the judge, ‘no, I didn’t kidnap the baby. It’s mine.’ The poor judge would have probably fallen for her innocent smile and award custody for the child to her,” he laughed, making everybody join in his laughter. “You do realize that you created an evil genius who could easily end up being a supervillain with her, right?”

“We do,” Oliver and Felicity answered in chorus.

Emmy was cute, clever and as a consequence captivating – a very dangerous mix of characteristics that would make it easy for her to become a powerful villain. Luckily, until now the abduction was the only incident that had made Felicity doubt that her daughter was following in her daughter’s footsteps. Her love for the Arrow actually showed pretty perfectly what Emmy’s life goal was.

“Okay, I need to pee! Cisco, take Tommy!” Caitlin demanded.

She gave the tiny human being to her friend before he could protest, then hastily jumped up and hurried to the bathroom. Cisco held Tommy with one hand under his small head, the other under his little butt. His arms were almost outstretched like he was trying to keep Tommy as far away from his body as possible.

“Okay! Okay! I got him! I got him! I- I am not sure that I really got him!” Cisco said a little panickedly when Tommy started to wake up and squirm on his hands.

“Don’t let him fall, Cisco!” Emmy said, moving from Iris’ lap to the empty spot on the couch to hold onto Cisco’s arm. “Don’t let him fall!”

“Emmy, behave yourself,” Felicity exhorted her daughter.

“Mommy, he’s letting him fall!” Emmeline complained.

Felicity only rolled her eyes. She knew that Emmy had gotten little sleep lately because Tommy wasn’t exactly easy to handle. He was mostly quiet during the day, but as soon as he was put to bed to bed in the evening, he started crying loudly up until the middle of the night, making it impossible not only for his parents but also for Emmeline to sleep in the room next door. So Emmy’s sleeping rhythm was out of order, she was tired and started to become overexcited. They just needed to find a solution for that.

“Don’t let him fall, Cisco!” Emmy repeated.

“Emmy,” Felicity said in a mixture of a sigh and a groan.

“She might actually be right, and Cisco does let him fall,” Oliver whispered lowly when Tommy squirmed even more, a loud cry escaping his throat, and Cisco had trouble balancing Tommy on his hands.

“Hey!” Felicity shouted quietly, slapping his shoulder for what seemed like the umpteenth today. “Be careful, Mister! You don’t want to start a fight with me when you can’t make it up properly. The doctor said we should wait with sex until-“

Oliver hastily coughed, making her aware that they weren’t alone, and she should probably better shut up. So Felicity pressed her lips together and tried to stop the blush she felt spreading on her face, but of course it was useless. She felt the warmth all over her face.

Before she got the chance to say anything that could cover up her embarrassing situation, though, Emmy pointed a finger at her father and shouted, “You coughed! You’re sick! You cannot come near Tommy!”

“What?” Oliver asked confusedly.

“You coughed! You-“

“I did hear you, Emmy,” Oliver interrupted her. “But you heard your mother. You should behave yourself or you will have to go to bed without a bedtime story tonight.”

“Why, Oliver?” Felicity asked sarcastically, mimicking his tone from before. “She’s only being cute.”

When Tommy made another uncomfortable sound, Barry reached over and put the pacifier between Tommy’s lips, and he calmed down, making it easier for Cisco to hold him. Still, he gave the newborn over to his godfather, obviously relieved to have gotten rid off the small human being.

Felicity shortly glanced at her watch. Usually this would be Emmy’s napping time. Since Tommy had come home, their daily rhythm was completely messed up. Emmeline spent every second watching over her little brother, waiting for him to do something he hadn’t done yet or to grow or whatever else. Yesterday she had spent at least two hours repeating her name to him, hoping he would say it, no matter how often Felicity and Oliver had told her that Tommy wasn’t going to say anything in the near future. Anyway, Emmy’s naps had kind of been inexistent in the past days. And even though now was probably not the best time to put her to bed for a nap with everyone being here, Felicity knew that if the toddler didn’t sleep now, she would cry and whine later.

“Mommy!” Emmy whined – there it was already! – and big tears were streaming down her cheeks.

“Can you put her to bed?” Felicity asked Oliver.

“Sure,” Oliver answered.

He pressed another kiss to the underside of her jaw before he stood up with Felicity in his arms. He put her back down in the armchair before he went over to the couch. Emmeline was still crying and whining that Oliver wasn’t supposed to come close to Tommy, but her objection was getting quieter with every second. When Oliver lifted her in his arms, she immediately put her head down on his shoulder, crying some more.

“Daddy, I want to stay with Tommy,” she whined while Oliver was already carrying her out of the room. “I don’t want to go to bed. I’m not tired.”

“Yeah, but you need to sleep a little, sweetie. You can cuddle with Tommy later again, okay?” Oliver asked, comfortingly rubbing her back. “I promise I’ll take care that he is not running away in the meantime.”

Daddy?” Emmy asked, her voice sounding week. Felicity couldn’t see them any longer since they were already halfway up the stairs, but she suggested that Emmy was falling asleep already. The toddler often pleaded to be allowed to stay up longer, only to fall asleep five minutes after.

“Yeah, sweetie?” Oliver answered softly.

“Tommy can’t walk yet.”

While everyone around was quietly chuckling, Felicity rolled her eyes. Emmy and her baby brother… They were certainly going to have a lot of fun and trouble with those two.

 

Groaning, Felicity let herself fall into bed with her face into the blanket and gripped the pillow to pull it over her head, muffling the sounds that came from the nursery. Even through the two closed doors and without the baby monitor being switched on she could hear Tommy crying. If there had ever been any doubt about whether his lungs worked properly, here was the proof that they did.

“How can something so small make so much noise?” she groaned from under her pillow.

It really should be impossible. Tommy was so small, looked so lost in his crib or Oliver’s arms or even his own clothes since he was born too early. How come that his lungs were still so well working that he had breath to cry like that? When Oliver only chuckled at her question, she peeped out from under her pillow, glaring at him. It made him shut up immediately.

Oliver and Felicity were alternating with who was taking what child to bed in the evening. After Tommy had his last milk for the evening, one of them was taking him to bed, the other took Emmy to bed, read her a story and cuddled some more. Usually it worked well that way because when the two of them were taking Tommy to bed together he usually needed more time to fall asleep. And even with only one parent it still took enough time.

“I think we should exchange him because there appear to be a production fault,” Felicity said after a while.

“What production fault?”

“They forgot the off switch,” she said. Oliver took the pillow from her head and hit her with it before putting it back to her head. Felicity frowned. “What was that for?”

“For talking about switching my child off,” Oliver replied.

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Fine. How about a mute button?”

“Felicity, we are Tommy’s producers. Where do you want to complain about him?”

“I complain to you,” Felicity grumbled.

“Should I go and try to calm him down?” Oliver asked.

“Yeah, because after nothing I did the last – I don’t know – maybe three hours helped him to calm down, seeing your face is going to make him stop crying and fall asleep immediately,” Felicity hissed. Oliver perked his eyebrow without saying anything, and she sighed, throwing the pillow to the end of the bed and rubbing her palms over her face. Sighing once more and without taking her hands from her face, she said, “I’m sorry. I’m just exhausted.”

Since her eyes were still closed, she didn’t see it, but she heard and felt him moving. Soon he was bending over her and kissed her upside down. It was a gentle, chaste kiss that ended way too soon for Felicity’s liking. Oliver was still leaning over her, though. She could feel his nose slightly bumping against hers with every intake of his breath that ghosted over her face with every exhalation.

Felicity sighed. She felt herself relax a little because being so close to Oliver and having a minute with only him was always nice. Still, the loud cries of their newborn son were worrying her.

“Okay, what are we doing wrong?” Felicity asked, opening her eyes and looking into Oliver’s piercing blue eyes. They made her heart skip a beat and her tongue loosen. “We have to do something wrong. _I_ have to do something wrong. But what is it? Maybe he doesn’t like my voice. Or my face. Or he hates me in general. I fell down the stairs and hence it is my fault he was born too soon. Maybe he is pissed at me because he didn’t want to be born yet. Can’t really be mad at him for blaming me because in the womb it was warm and comfortable all the time and now he is here and everybody is-“

Oliver stopped her with a gentle kiss to her lips.

“He doesn’t hate you,” he whispered then. “He is just… very dissatisfied.”

Felicity sighed once more, but it ended in a whine when Tommy cried even more loudly now.

“What are we doing with him?” Felicity asked, hiding her face behind her eyes once more.

“How about we just let him cry?” Oliver suggested.

Felicity rolled onto her stomach and lifted her head, so she could look at Oliver closely with her eyes narrowed.

“Oliver,” she said, “our son is not even three weeks old. We cannot let him cry all night.”

“Maybe he is getting tired with all the crying,” he answered. “And since you are completely against bringing a baby into the bed, it might be our only way to get some sleep.”

“I am against a family bed because we had one the last months with Emmy sleeping here. And we both agreed that we will kick her out of our bed as soon as Tommy is born. What’s the use of kicking one child out of bed to have more room and more privacy when we invite the other in? Besides, I can’t sleep with those background sounds,” Felicity grumbled. “How the hell is Emmy able to sleep when Tommy is crying like that?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I helped her putting on the pajama Lyla and John bought her, the one that matches with Tommy’s romper suit” – a grey one with white bunnies on it, Felicity remembered – “and then I put her to bed, wrapped her into her blanket, read her a story, kissed her forehead and she was sleeping before the door was closed.”

“Yesterday it only took half an hour before you got Tommy to sleep and almost two hours before Emmy fell asleep. Why do you always get the kids on their best days?”

“Hey, I offered to take Tommy to bed today, so you wouldn’t have to have the stressful kid two nights in a row.”

“I don’t want to break our routine of altering between who takes Emmy and who takes Tommy to bed each day. Both children need to know that we love them.”

“Given what has happened the last two nights, I think they love me more than you.”

Felicity turned her head and put on a pouting face when she whispered, “I hate you a little right now.”

“No, you don’t,” Oliver chuckled. “You love me. Very much actually. And if we were allowed to have sex right now, you would-“

“Wait, wait, wait!” Felicity interrupted him hastily, slapping her hand over his mouth and listened into the silence. “Do you hear that?”

Oliver shook his head, gripping her wrists and pulling her hand from his lips to say, “I don’t hear anything. Wh-“

“Exactly,” she whispered. “We don’t hear anything. Tommy has stopped crying.”

“There is a God!” Oliver shouted in a whisper, looking up at the ceiling like he was praising whatever God there was for making their baby boy sleep.

Chuckling, Felicity rolled over and moved around until she lay snuggled up to Oliver’s side, her head resting on his shoulder and her hand stroking over his bare abs. Oliver’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer without pressing her lower stomach to his muscular body. He knew that she was still sore where a newly gained scar reminded them of the horrific circumstances that had framed Tommy’s birth. Felicity knew exactly that he was thinking about the night she had given birth to Tommy and Oliver had almost lost both of them when his arm tightened around her a little more and he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head. She turned her head to kiss the warm skin right over his heart, reassuring him that she was okay.

They stayed in this comfortable silence without saying a word, enjoying the moment of silence. Since Tommy’s birth their life was a chaos. They had thought that the change from one to two children wouldn’t be that hard, but they had obviously underestimated the energy a newborn cost. How had they been able to forget that Emmy had been just like Tommy when she had been that age? She had only slept when she had been held. Well, Tommy refused to sleep even then, so maybe they hadn’t been able to anticipate the work this newborn made. It was a miracle that he had fallen asleep on his own now.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked after a while.

“Do you think he’s dead?” Oliver asked like reading her mind.

“He’s not, right?” Felicity asked, knowing in the back of her mind that the thought was stupid, and Tommy had probably only been that exhausted from all the crying that he had fallen asleep.

“We should check on him, right? We are not overly worried. We are only… normally worried because we are parents, right?”

Felicity nodded affirmatively. “Right.”

Oliver used the strength of his abdominal muscles to sit up. His chest pressed against Felicity’s, so she sat up with him without using a single muscle herself. They crawled out of bed together and hand in hand hurried over to the nursery. They opened the door as quietly as possible, knowing that every sound could wake Tommy.

With only a small bundle of light from the corridor falling into the room they stepped closer to the crib. The moment they looked into it, they knew why Tommy had fallen asleep. Watching the scene before them, Felicity wrapped her arms around her husband’s middle and leaned her head against his chest right above his heart while Oliver embrace her with his strong arms around his shoulders. He snuggled his cheek to the crown of her head, sighing contently.

“Look at that,” Felicity said unnecessarily since Oliver was watching what there was to be seen in the crib already. “Our babies.”

Emmy was lying in the crib with Tommy. Her body was snuggled up to his side without pressing to close. One of her hands rested on Tommy’s tummy. Both children were fast asleep. The even rise and fall of their chests with every breath seemed to be the only proof that they were still alive.

“Do you think we should take Emmy back to her room?” Oliver asked. “I don’t want her to roll over and crush Tommy accidently.”

“Emmy sleeps like a log once she is asleep,” Felicity whispered. “Let’s just leave her here. Tommy is going to wake up in like two hours for milk anyway. We should use the time and try to get some rest.”

Oliver nodded, but when Felicity took the first step to the door he stayed where he was in front of the crib, his eyes focused on their children. So Felicity stepped towards him again, putting one hand to his chest, right over his heart. She looked at him without saying anything, giving him the time he needed to figure out what he was thinking and feeling.

Felicity knew that this was overwhelming for him. She herself felt that way, but for someone who had been through so much and who had suffered through so much it must be even more intensive. After Emmy had been born, Oliver had spent hours just watching his daughter during the night. And when Felicity had asked him about that he had told her that since the island he had never thought that could be his reality. Being a happily married man and proud dad had seemed so unreachable to him after all the suffering and sorrow. He had said it from time to time again and even when he hadn’t said it, sometimes Felicity had seen in the look in his eyes that he had felt it.

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?” he asked. “We have found us. We have created those two beautiful babies. We have… this perfect life.”

“We do,” Felicity agreed with a nod.

“How do I deser-“

Felicity silenced him with a kiss before he could finish that sentence. When their lips parted, she rested her head against his forehead and whispered, “With everything you do and are.”

Oliver sighed quietly before he whispered, “I wish I could take a photo of this. Our two babies sleeping like that.”

“Tomorrow,” Felicity replied. “For now we should let Tommy and Emmy sleep.”

Before they left the room, Oliver switched on the baby monitor. Outside of the room Felicity stood still and looked at Oliver.

“What?” he asked.

“How did she do that?” Felicity asked with low voice to not wake the kids. She looked back like she could still see the crib her babies were sleeping in safely, but all she saw was the closed door. “How did she get him to sleep?”

“Maybe he just wanted to be cuddled or held,” Oliver suggested.

“Yeah, that has to be it because I didn’t try that during the hours I tried to get him to sleep,” Felicity said sarcastically and rolled her eyes. “I tried everything. I tried holding him and singing to him and feeding him and changing his diaper even though there was nothing in it. I tried holding him next to the washing machine because I read that the sound reminds babies of what they heard in the uterus. I wrapped him into a blanket, I unwrapped him. I talked to him, I-

“Okay, I got it,” Oliver said hastily, taking her hand to pull her into their bedroom. “I guess Emmy has superpowers then.”

“Maybe we should ask Caitlin to check her and run some tests and-“

“Nobody runs tests on my daughter,” Oliver said firmly, lifting Felicity onto the bed and covering her with the blanket. Then he slid in next to her, his strong arms wrapped around her. “We should sleep.”

“You’re right. We need to use the time Emmy’s superpowers still work,” Felicity sighed, eyes already closed. “I have no idea how we will get to sleep when she loses them.”

Oliver chuckled quietly and kissed the top of Felicity’s head. He could feel her breathing even out against his naked chest and stroked over her hair gently, looking at the display of the baby monitor on the nightstand where he could see their children sleeping safely until sleep lulled him in, too.


	83. The past, the present and the future

One month. Tommy was one month old, five weeks to be exact. How had time passed so quickly, Oliver wondered while he was directing his car into the garage. It still felt like yesterday that they had learned that Felicity was pregnant again, never mind that Tommy had been born and he had first held his son in his arms. It was like the little boy was growing constantly. Oliver held him every morning before he would go to work and every evening when he returned, and he could swear that the boy was growing a lot during those hours of the day. It was almost terrifying how fast the little boy was growing bigger.

Grinning widely like an idiot, he walked over to the house and opened the door. He noticed with surprise and slight hurt that the pattering sounds of his daughter’s feet on the hardwood floor that told him that she was running to him to welcome him home were missing. He stepped further into the room, put his briefcase next to the stairs and took off the jacket of his suit. He even took the time to roll up his sleeves slowly, giving Emmy time to come running towards him like she usually did to kiss him and start telling him everything he had missed during the day.

But Emmy didn’t come running towards him. He had clearly been replaced as the first man in her heart. Tommy was more important to her now. The toddler sometimes seemed like glued to her baby brother. She already made plans about the future, about what she and Tommy could do once Tommy would be a little older and he could walk and talk and understand what she was saying. Right now she needed to limit herself to spending every minute of every day with him, watching him and asking her parents questions about him because there wasn’t much Tommy was able to do apart from crying, eating und sleeping. Emmy even slept in her brother’s bed. And although Felicity and Oliver had not been sure on whether that was the best idea, they let her. Both of their kids were falling asleep faster when they were sleeping together in one bed. So why should they make the putting the children to bed at night unnecessarily difficult?

Oliver sighed. As long as it was only his son and hence Emmy’s baby brother who took the place as her favorite man in her heart away from him, Oliver was okay. The moment that spot would be occupied by someone who wasn’t a close blood relative to her, he would probably freak out, maybe even kill someone. But hopefully a lot of time would pass before that would happen.

Shaking his head to chase off the thought of his baby girl falling in love or anything, he went over into the living room, expecting to find Emmeline snuggled up to her mother on the couch, rubbing her brother’s back, while the little boy was quietly resting on Felicity’s chest. But his family was nowhere to be found. He frowned worriedly. Felicity hadn’t said anything about her not being at home when he would come back from work. He had actually asked her whether she was here because he needed to talk to her about something. He had finally made up his mind about what he wanted.

“Anybody here?” Oliver asked into the empty room like Felicity, Emmy and Tommy would just come out from under the furniture or anything.

“Just me,” Quentin replied. Oliver turned around to see the man who was kind of his father-in-law stepping into the door to the kitchen and leaning into the doorframe with his arms crossed in front of his chest

Oliver perked his eyebrows. “Quentin. I hadn’t thought you’d still be here.”

Before Felicity had been released from the hospital, Oliver had asked for his help. After Felicity had suffered through a prenatal depression the worry of a postnatal depression to start had frightened him, and he had known that he wouldn’t have a calm moment if Felicity was alone with the kids all day, and he didn’t know anything about what she was doing and how she was feeling until he came home from work in the evening. So he had asked Quentin to take some time off from his job and spend his days here instead, and Quentin had agreed because he loved Felicity and he had noticed how hard the first trimester of her pregnancy had been for the two of them. Felicity thought that Quentin needed somebody to watch him, though, because Oliver knew that she would never agree to have someone here to keep an eye on her. The first days Quentin arrived shortly after Oliver had left for work and went back home around the time Oliver would come home, so Felicity had never been alone and if there had been any major problems, Quentin would have called Oliver.

Luckily, there had never been such problems. Actually everything had been so perfect and Felicity had been so happy lately that Quentin had come more irregularly for a few hours each day, claiming that his doctor had told him his health had become better. So the fact that Quentin was still here was unusual for how their days had been lately.

Oliver’s heart skipped a beat at the thought what Quentin’s presence here tonight and the missing of his family could possibly mean. He remembered how out of the blue Felicity’s depression had come months ago. One day everything had been perfect, the next everything had gone down when she had started to push him away. Later he had learned that she had been feeling bad for days already and that day it had only broken out of her. They had talked a lot about what Felicity had been feeling and how it had come that far that one night they had been yelling at each other and she had almost suggested that they should get divorced. They had both agreed that if Felicity was ever feeling the slightest touch of a feeling similar to what the depression had felt like, she would tell him and they would figure out what to do together.

But Oliver was sure that that was a lot easier to say then to do.  
That was why he had asked Quentin to come here and keep an eye on Felicity. If he noticed any change in her mood or her behavior or whatever, he would call Oliver. That had been the deal.

Oliver knew it sounded like he was controlling Felicity or spying on her, and that his excuse that he was just so worried about her was a weak one, but he knew that Felicity was worried as well and…  
It was all very complicated.

“Where is everyone?” Oliver asked nervously.

“Emmy is spending the night at your sister’s place,” Quentin explained. “Felicity and Tommy are upstairs.”

“Emmy is not with her baby brother? I thought her excitement would last a little longer than a month,” Oliver answered, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants. When Emmy wasn’t here, it only seemed to confirm his worst fear. “Like the rest of her life or something.”

It was a weak try to ease the tension he felt in every single cell of his body, but at least Quentin chuckled quietly before he answered “Well, I was greeted with the words ‘Granpa, Tommy’s poo-poo is everywhere’ this morning. I think that might have been a little buffer because I have seen it, and Tommy’s poo-poo has been everywhere indeed. We needed to repaint part of the wall in the nursery.”

Oliver grinned weakly, not really feeling like grinning about anything as long as he didn’t know what was going on but at the same time couldn’t stop himself from feeling this weird kind of pride. Were parents supposed to be proud when their children did a dump? Probably not, but kind of everything his children did made him proud. When it had been that way with Emmy, Oliver had been sure that it had just been because she had been his first child. But someone the pride didn’t seem to decrease now with Tommy. It was really ridiculous, but he couldn’t help himself.

“How’s Felicity?” he asked when he couldn’t take it any longer. He felt in his bones that something was wrong.

Quentin shot a glance towards the stairs like he could see her standing there. But she wasn’t there.

“She was having a rough day. Tommy was really exhausting, has cried almost all the time. You should probably go upstairs and talk to her,” Quentin answered and started walking towards the door. With the hand at the doorhandle he turned around to Oliver once more, but he didn’t say anything. He just looked at Oliver and still Oliver knew what he was trying to say, so he nodded.

As soon as the door had fallen shut behind Quentin, Oliver took in a deep breath, turned around on his heels and walked upstairs.

He felt slightly nervous because he remembered all the pain they had been through too well. He remembered how helpless he had felt when he had been forced to watch Felicity losing herself without any idea of what he could do to make her feel better and whether she still loved him or she had given up on him.

He wouldn’t let it go that far again. He knew what he had to do.

Taking in another deep breath, Oliver lifted his fist and knocked quietly at the door. He heard her humming quietly, so he slowly opened the door and stepped into the bedroom. Felicity was lying on the bed, a long queue falling over her shoulder. Tommy was snuggled up to her front while both of them were lying on their sides. Felicity had put one arm under Tommy’s head, the hand of the other arm rested in front of her while Tommy’s little fist was closed around her index finger. Her eyes were closed, but she slowly opened them. She looked tired and exhausted.

“Before we-“ Oliver started in the same moment Felicity begun saying, “I am-“

They both stopped and chuckled quietly. Oliver took Felicity’s chuckling as a good sign. When her depression had been on its worst she had barely been able to even smile, so…

Normally he would ask her to go first and say what she wanted to say, but today he asked, “Can I start?”

Felicity nodded without saying anything. She just looked at him. Oliver felt the need to step closer and touch the dark shadows under her eyes, but he knew that if she was having a bad day she wouldn’t want not be touched. So Oliver stayed at the door, giving her the room she had always given him when he had had his grumpy days as she would call them.

“Quentin mentioned that you were having a bad day,” Oliver started a little nervously. “So I know that you probably want to be left alone. And it’s okay if you want that. I just want to let you know that I love you and I am here for you and if there is anything I can do for you, just say so. There is nothing that can chase me away, no matter what you say you need right now.”

He knew that she needed to hear those words because when she had closed herself off from him during her prenatal depression and he hadn’t understood what was going on with her, she had tried to chase him away to protect him and because she had felt bad and it had made everything worse because she had only felt guilty afterwards. So he had promised himself that no matter what would happen, he would always assure her that she wouldn’t lose him and that he was there for her. No matter what.

“I wanted to say that I am glad that you’re home. Because I had a bad day, I am tired, have a headache and I was looking forward to you crawling into bed with Tommy and me, so we can cuddle a little,” Felicity said after a while, smiling softly.

Oliver’s smile matched hers when he approached the bed, slipped off his shoes and crawled into bed next to his wife and his son. His chest made contact with Tommy’s warm back, feeling the baby’s heartbeat strong and fast against his abs. He put a hand to Felicity’s cheek, his thumb caressing the soft skin above her cheekbone, before he kissed her slowly and gently. It was a wordless thanks for not pushing him away. And he knew that she understood.

He rested his head right next to hers, their foreheads staying in touch. Oliver watched Tommy sleeping quietly. The little boy was a trouble maker with all his crying, but he was so beautiful and so loved already, it was just impossible to be mad at him for keeping them busy almost every hour of every day. Just like his older sister he had his parents wrapped around his little finger.

“Why didn’t you call me?” Oliver asked after a while. “If you were having a bad day, you shouldn’t have to go through it alone. I would have come home immediately.”

“Why? I had Quentin to watch out for us,” Felicity sighed, her eyes already closed again.

Oliver opened his mouth to reply that Quentin was here because the doctor had said he needed someone to watch out for his health, but Felicity blinked at him through one eye, and Oliver pressed his lips together tightly, lowering his gaze and admitting defeat.

“Since when do you know?” he asked quietly.

“Since the day he came into my room in the hospital and asked me if he could stay here, so I could keep an eye on him,” Felicity replied.

Of course she had been too smart to buy that lie, Oliver thought. He should have known. Felicity was the smartest person he had ever met, and he had never been able to fool her into buying one of his lies.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

Felicity opened her eyes with a sigh, smiling softly. “You needed to know that I wouldn’t be alone if the depression was coming back, so you could be here as soon as possible if that happened. And Emmy loves her grandpa Quentin, and I like him and I love you, so…”

She just shrugged her shoulders and kept smiling at him. She had agreed for him. Because he had needed it, Oliver thought, felling kind of overwhelmed by the thought. So he just leaned forward once again and kissed her.

Again silence settled. It was a comfortable silence, the kind of silence where no words were needed because you knew the other person to the core, and you knew what the other were thinking and feeling. When Tommy made a low sound, Oliver leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to his son’s head, and immediately he fell silent again.

“You said this morning that you wanted to talk to me about something,” Felicity said after a while, opening her eyes with a sigh.

Oliver shook his head and whispered, “We don’t have to talk about it now. Sleep as long as Tommy is quiet. We can wait until we find another quiet moment and you feel better.”

“In that case you should take a note because it might take another month,” Felicity chuckled. “Besides, now that you are here, I feel a lot better already.”

Smiling, he leaned down and kissed her once more. His heart was beating rapidly like he hadn’t heard her saying those and similar words a thousand times before. Maybe it meant especially much today since he had expected to be pushed away by her. Over the past year they had grown so much, grown even closer to one another.

“I’ve been thinking about what I really want,” Oliver said. “You know, after I resigned from my candidacy, you asked me what I really wanted and I think I do know now.”

“Great,” Felicity said.

She moved her head a little, so the crown of Tommy’s head was nestled against the underside of her jaw and the tip of her nose bumped against Oliver’s slightly. Oliver lowered his hand, moving it from her cheek down her neck, her shoulder and arm to wrap it around her waist tightly, pulling her as close as possible without crushing Tommy. Oliver closed his eyes with a sigh. The day had been exhausting, and he could fall asleep just like this, holding two of the three most important people to him in his arms. He loved family cuddle time. They did this way too rarely, mainly because Tommy was crying most of the day, and cuddling with a crying child wasn’t really relaxing. They just needed to use more quiet moments like this one.

“Are you going to tell me what you want or do I have to read your mind?” Felicity asked and when Oliver opened his eyes, he saw her frowning at him. “I know you are really good at reading my mind and knowing what I want, but I am very tired and tried to read our son’s mind to figure out what he wants. I failed. Miserably. So I am discouraged about trying to read someone’s mind again which means that you should tell me what you want or otherwise I might buy you a toaster.”

“A toaster?”

“I told you today I was failing at reading your mind about what you want.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed Felicity shortly. Was it possible to love someone even more?

He opened his mouth to answer her question and tell her what he had figured out he wanted, but he suddenly felt weirdly nervous about it. There were so many things that would change. The last three years they had built a routine in their lives and it was working. What if this wasn’t working? What if Felicity didn’t agree? He had pictured the next years the way they would probably go when Felicity agreed, and he loved every single second of that future. What would happen if they were continuing how things were now? Of course he would still be happy because Felicity and the kids were all he needed and-

“Oliver?”

Her quiet voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he looked at her, finding that she smiled amusedly.

“You do know that you kind of adapted my habit of babbling and speaking out loud what was supposed to be in your thoughts only?” she asked, pulling her finger out of Tommy’s tight grip, so she could put her hand to his cheek and let his stubble scratch the tips of her fingers gently. “Are you going to blush now?”

“I am a guy. I don’t blush,” Oliver stated firmly, but at the same time wondered whether his cheeks felt warmer than they normally did which would be a sign that he was indeed blushing. Just like Felicity’s amused grin was a sign for that. Over the years they knew each other Felicity had adapted the nervous rubbing of the thumb against the other fingers of the hand from him. Oliver had picked up her babbling, but he definitely would not pick up her blushing, so he hastily cleared his throat. “I do have a wish, but I am not sure if you will be too happy about it.”

Felicity perked her eyebrow. “I know I said I am open for everything, but if you suggest that you want to build a harem, the answer will be no. Everything else will be seriously considered. Just so you know.”

Chuckling, Oliver kissed Felicity once more. He loved kissing her, and he especially loved kissing over the head of their newborn son. With two little children quiet moments like this one had become rare, so it was nice to just lie here and talk to her and kiss her every once in a while.

“Why would I want more women? You are exhausting enough for a whole harem,” Oliver joked, earning him a not so gentle punch against his shoulder. Still, it only made him chuckle more. “No, it’s not that. It’s something else. But it could be too much, and I think you should know that it is okay to say no and-“

“Oliver, maybe you should say what you want before you let me know how okay it is if I disagree,” Felicity suggested with a smile, moving the tips of her fingers over his stubble once more. “Come on, you agreed way too long to everything I said we or rather you should do, so…”

“I want to be a stay-at-home dad,” he blurted out. “I want to give my position in QC to you and stay home with the kids instead.”

His heart was racing. He had said it. He had said what he wanted. It was out there.

Oliver didn’t know why exactly he had been that nervous about telling her. It wasn’t like Felicity was going to rip off his head for wanting that. It was only that there was the possibility that she wouldn’t agree because after all she was still Emmy’s and Tommy’s mother and she was the one who had born them and been the stay-at-home parent until now. It felt like he was trying to take something from her with wanting to be the stay-at-home dad and he had promised himself to always give her everything she wanted and he could give her because he loved her so much and-

“Okay,” Felicity said with a nod.

“Okay?”

“Sure,” Felicity confirmed. “If that is what you want, we will do this. Besides, after all this time at home, I think having a job outside of our home again would be really nice. I just think we should wait a little before we put this into action, so Emmy and Tommy will both be able to get used to it, but I think the end of November would be the right moment to do this. Tommy will be five months old then. I think that is a good age for me to go working again. And I could start getting back into the work by the beginning of November, so it won’t be a complete shock when we switch from one day to the other. And you would have all the pre-Christmas time alone with the kids. Or do you think it is too long? You would have to wait seventeen more weeks before-”

He interrupted her babble – she was so much cuter when babbling than he was – with a kiss to her lips. It started gently and slowly, but soon became more intensive. His tongue entered her mouth, massaging her tongue. They sighed into each other’s mouth and only pulled apart when Tommy made a dissatisfied sound.

When they looked down to him they found that he was slowly waking up. His little eyes were opened. He squirmed, his left hand moving around, his right hand resting on Felicity’s breast.

“I think he’s hungry,” Felicity said with a sigh, kissing Oliver once more before she sat up and rested back against the headboard of the bed. She moved her arm out of the left sleeve of her shirt, pulling the fabric down and opening her bra, so she could move the left cup down and free her breast. Carefully supporting his head, she took Tommy and cradled him against her. Immediately he started sucking at her nipple, drinking hungrily.

“Maybe you become a mind reader after all,” Oliver grinned, sitting up, too, to rest back against the headboard next to her and wrap an arm around Felicity’s shoulder, watching their son just like she did. Clearing his voice lowly, he asked, “So we are doing this?”

Felicity turned her gaze away from the drinking baby and to her husband. She smiled softly, making Oliver’s heart skip a beat. “Of course we are doing this. I had three years to be a stay-at-home mother, and it was great, but I’d like to go back to… other… work again. And if you want to be a stay-at-home dad, that is perfect. Although I have to admit that I will miss the sight of you wearing a dress shirt and rolling the sleeves up. It’s hot.”

“I could still wear dress shirts every now and then.”

“Oh, yes please,” Felicity grinned amusedly before her face became a little more serious again. “Is it okay for you if we wait until Tommy is five months old? I know there is still a lot of time until then.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “We don’t need to rush this. I would have suggested we wait until he is one year old, but if you are willing to do this sooner, the better for me.”

“You say that now,” Felicity chuckled. “Wait until you have to spend all day with two little children. Speaking of, you need to learn how to cook because I am not letting our children die from your inexistent cooking skills. So maybe the few weeks until we switch places can be useful to prepare you for that.”

“I already learned how to cook actually.”

“When?” Felicity asked with wide eyes. “And… who taught you?”

“Lyla did,” Oliver answered. He kissed the tip of her nose before he added, “We met every once in a while over the past months. She says I am the best student she ever got although part of the reason for that could be that she never taught anyone else how to cook… Anyway, I think I can cook even better than she does.”

“I think we should leave that judgment up to me,” Felicity explained, winking playfully. “I am disappointed. I wanted to be the one who teaches you cooking.”

Oliver lowered his lips to her neck, pressing a short kiss to her pulse point. He would have loved to have Felicity as his cooking teacher, but he had wanted to surprise her with his cooking skills. She already knew that he could bake, but cooking hadn’t been a talent of him until Lyla had taught him. He had intended to just cook her a dinner like it was the most normal thing in the world, grinning amusedly while she was picking at her food and widening his grin when her eyes were widening in surprise that the dinner he had cooked was actually delicious. Maybe there would still be an opportunity to do that.

When Tommy was done drinking, Felicity put the little boy to Oliver’s chest and adjusted her clothes before she snuggled up to Oliver’s side herself. She put a leg in between his like she was trying to anchor him to the bed. Oliver didn’t mind. He put his one hand on their son’s back and pulled Felicity closer with the other arm.

“Thank you,” he whispered to her hair and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, “for letting me do this.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied, snuggling her cheek more to his chest and putting her hand on top of his on Tommy’s back. “You are a great dad, Oliver, and I think our kids will love to have you here more often. And we will figure out everything else.”

Oliver nodded. “I love you, Felicity.”

“I love you, Oliver,” she answered.

Tommy made a quiet sound, reminding his parents that he was still there, too. Looking at their son, Oliver and Felicity both said, “We love you, Tommy.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... my gift for second Advent. :)


	84. Daddy's little girl

“Everything’s alright, Emmy. You’re safe. I’m here. You’re safe. Everything’s alright.”

Felicity couldn’t count how many times she had said those words tonight already. She was repeating them again and again while she was walking up and down in the living room with her toddler pressed to her chest. She could still feel the little girl’s tears on her neck since Emmy held her face hidden against her mother’s neck, clinging to her for dear life.

More than half an hour ago the little girl had woken up with an ear-piercing screech. Felicity had blindly rolled out of bed and ran to Tommy’s nursery where Emmeline was sleeping since her brother was not even three weeks old. She had sat in bed, crying and sobbing, and had held her little arms stretched out for her mother as soon as she had seen her. It was a miracle that Tommy hadn’t woken up. And to not risk that that would happen after all Felicity had taken Emmy to the living room where she was still trying to calm her down.

“Everything’s alright, Emmy. You’re safe. I’m here. You’re safe. Everything’s alright,” she whispered the mantra once more, but it didn’t seem to help. She had asked her daughter what was wrong, but the toddler had kept crying and sobbing too much to even form a complete sentence to answer the question. Felicity was sure that Emmy had had a nightmare, but she still didn’t know what it had been about. So she snuggled her cheek to the top of her daughter’s head and repeated the words once more, “Everything’s alright, Emmy. You’re safe. I’m here. You’re safe. Everything’s alright.”

Felicity had experience with nightmares. She couldn’t remember how many times Oliver had woken up, gasping for breath and looking around in panic. It had become a lot better over the years, but still there were nights that he woke up like that. And usually it helped him to just hold her as close as possible or get the kids into bed with her. Emmy rarely ever had a nightmare and when she had one, it usually helped her to just be snuggle up to her parents. Something seemed to be different tonight.

When Emmy’s breathing finally calmed down a little, Felicity almost sighed in relief. She pressed a kiss to her daughter’s head. Just when she was about to ask her what she had dreamed of and what had scared her so much, the toddler lifted her head from her mother’s shoulder and asked, “Mommy, where’s daddy?”

Felicity wiped away some of the tears from her daughter’s cheeks before she answered, “Daddy needs to work in a different city which is why he is staying in a hotel tonight. Remember? Daddy told you before he left.”

With a sigh Emmy let her head drop to her mother’s shoulder again. Felicity could feel in the slight shaking of her tiny body that she still hadn’t calmed down completely. It took a few minutes before Emmy was lifting her head once more and looked at her mother again.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“Did a monster eat daddy?”

Felicity frowned. “Is that what you dreamed? Emmy, that didn’t happen. Daddy’s fine. You just had a nightmare, but it wasn’t real.”

“I saw it!” Emmy whined out loudly and shook her head fiercely. Then she rested her head against her mother’s shoulder again and started crying once more.

“Okay, you know what?” Felicity asked, already walking over to the kitchen where she had left her phone on the countertop before she had headed to bed tonight. “We are going to call daddy.”

“Face time?”

“Of course we’ll do face time. What’s the fun talking to daddy if we cannot see his face doing so, right?”

Felicity picked up the phone and dialed Oliver’s number. She knew that he couldn’t sleep when he was away from her or their kids anyway which was why they held business trips short. Before Felicity had been pregnant with Emmy and had worked at QC with him, she had accompanied him on every trip. Soon she would be the one at the head of the company. Felicity could barely wait to start working again.

It didn’t take long before Oliver’s face appeared on the screen. Felicity could tell from the expression in his tired eyes alone that she had been right. He hadn’t slept yet.

“Hi, my lo-“ he started, but interrupted himself as soon as he saw his daughter’s tear-filled eyes. The smile on his face dropped and with a worried gaze to his wife he asked, “What happened?”

“Nightmare,” Felicity mouthed to him soundlessly before she pressed a kiss to her daughter’s temple and whispered into her ear to tell her daddy what had happened.

“There was a monster,” Emmy sobbed, taking the phone away from her mother to hold it in her own tiny hands and keep it closer to her eyes. “It ate you.”

“It ate me?” Oliver asked. “Pf! Is daddy letting a monster eat him?”

“No?” Emmy answered, not completely convinced.

“Look at all the strong muscles here,” Oliver said and lifted his arms to show his daughter both of his biceps. “I would easily fight off all the monsters.”

“Without mommy?”

Felicity did her best to suppress a chuckle. Emmy had mostly calmed down the moment she had seen that her daddy was okay and had not been eaten by a monster, so Felicity was sure that the toddler was soon going to fall asleep again. Being in her parents’ comfy bed would hopefully help with that. So she was carrying Emmy upstairs already. And then Felicity could hopefully sleep soon, but if she made any too loud sound now, Tommy would wake up and sleep for Felicity would recede far into the distance.

“I know, usually mommy protects me when monsters threaten me,” Oliver answered, and Felicity hastily opened the door to their bedroom and entered it before closing the door safely behind her, “but sometimes daddy tries to be brave and fight the monsters himself.”

When nightmares had been very bad for Oliver, he had woken up with a scream. It had only happened like a handful of times, but those times it had happened, Emmy had woken up and come into her parents’ bedroom, asking what was wrong. Oliver had told her that he had thought that monsters had been chasing him, but he wasn’t sure. And then he had joked that they had probably bolted when they had seen Felicity since she was a monster fighter and they got scared when they saw her. Since then Felicity was Emmy’s personal monster fighter, and she needed to look in every edge of the girl’s bedroom for monsters before the toddle would lie down and sleep. But of course Emmeline hadn’t only needed the reassurance that she was safe because her personal monster fighter was here tonight, but she had also needed proof that her dad was really alright.

“How?” Emmy asked.

Just when Oliver opened his lips to respond, the baby monitor Felicity had fastened to the waistband of her pajama pants transmitted a quiet cry from Tommy in the nursery. Sleep was probably not going to happen for her tonight, Felicity thought when she let Emmy down on the bed.

“Sweetie, can I leave you alone?” Felicity asked.

“I’m not alone. Daddy is here,” Emmy replied and waved with her mother’s phone. “You need help with Tommy?”

“I got him handled I think,” Felicity said with a wink, noticing Oliver’s amused grin.

Their daughter was such a sweetheart. She hadn’t complained once that their lives had changed so much since Tommy had been born. She didn’t say a word when she needed to interrupt the story she was telling because Tommy started crying, and she didn’t get mad when family cuddling time in front of TV got interrupted because Tommy needed to be fed, and she didn’t mind that people that came here for a visit seemed to be more interested in her little brother than in her nowadays. And when Felicity was tired because Tommy had been crying for hours and she got to lie down the first time the day, Emmy didn’t urge her mother to play with her. She just put the blanket over her, asked her if she needed anything else and snuggled up to her or played with her dolls or kept herself busy otherwise. The child was a real blessing.

How come Emmy was only two and a half years old?

With a kiss to her daughter’s head and a low whisper, asking her to give daddy a kiss from mommy, Felicity left the room. She heard Emmy ask, “How do you fight monsters, daddy?”, but Oliver’s answer was drowned by the louder growing cries of her baby boy.

Felicity opened the door to the nursery, using the small bundle of light to orientate herself in the dark room. Without any other light and without her glasses she felt weirdly insecure even if she knew exactly where every piece of furniture was placed in the room. She went straight to the crib from which she had lifted a crying Emmy some while ago to now cradle Tommy into her arms.

“I know you are not hungry,” Felicity whispered, putting Tommy against her chest with his little head resting against the crook of her neck. “Are you missing Emmy?”

The boy’s cries became a little lower like his mother’s words were actually comforting him. Felicity rubbed his back soothingly like she had with Emmy’s before and started walking up and down, something else she had done for Emmy before.

Usually Oliver was the one to work the nightshifts in the nursery. It was almost ridiculous since he was the working and she the stay-at-home parent. He needed the sleep so much more than she did, but Oliver insisted on taking care of the children at night. He got up in the night to calm Tommy down when he was crying for no obvious reason and fed him one of the bottles with Felicity’s mother’s milk from the fridge when Tommy was hungry.

Just like Felicity couldn’t wait to finally being able to go back to Queen Consolidated and work, Oliver couldn’t wait to leave his daytime job to spend more times with the kids.

When Tommy hadn’t fallen asleep yet, but at least his cries had finally calmed down completely, Felicity quietly walked into the corridor with Tommy still pressed to her chest. She leaned against the wall right next to the bedroom door from where she could hear her daughter still talking to her husband on the phone. It was good hearing his voice. Between his meetings and taking care of two little kids there had only been little time to call each other during the last two days that he had been away.

Closing her eyes and nuzzling her son’s hair, Felicity listened to Emmy telling Oliver everything they had done today, beginning with the breakfast and ending with the nightmare. She spoke almost without any pauses since she had inherited her mother’s ability to babble. Oliver only laughed every once in a while or asked little questions to encourage her to talk more. She ended her story with a long, exhausted sigh.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“When do you come home?”

“Very late tomorrow night. You will already be asleep then.”

Emmy sighed again. “That’s long.”

“Don’t worry, Emmy. Not long and- Ha! You yawned first! You lost,” Oliver interrupted himself.

“No!” Emmy objected. “I opened my mouth!”

“No, you ya-“ Oliver began, but the sentence ended in a yawn.

Felicity chuckled soundlessly. She knew that Oliver wasn’t exactly a person to yawn often. She knew that he and Emmy sometimes played the who-yawns-first-loses game, so he could spend a little more time with her when he put her to bed. He would win every time if he didn’t let her win at least every second round.

“Come on, you are tired, I am tired, we just lie down and try to sleep.”

“Mommy’s not here,” Emmeline said, a little angst still left in her voice.

“I’m here,” Oliver reassured her. “And mommy’s only a few feet away, taking care of Tommy.”

For a short moment nothing was to be heard. Then the rustling of the blankets told Felicity that Emmy had made herself comfortable in bed. She was about to sneak a peek, but she felt Tommy starting to squirm again in her arms and hastily left to the nursery again, so Emmy wouldn’t be disturbed by her brother.

It took Felicity almost two hours to get the little boy to sleep again. When she returned to her own bedroom, Emmy was resting in the sea of pillows, wrapped in Oliver’s blanket. On the pillow right next to her lay Felicity’s phone, Oliver’s sleeping face on the screen. Smiling, Felicity crawled into bed next to her daughter, pulled her close to her own body until the little girl’s hands formed to fists in her mother’s shirt. She left the phone where it was, so Oliver could hear them breathe subconsciously, hoping it would be enough to let him sleep through the rest of the night, too.

 

The moment the taxi directed into his street, Oliver’s smile widened even more. It would hurt if he wasn’t that used to being happy and smiling by now. His family gave him so many reasons to smile and be happy, he could barely remember how he had managed to be broody for so long. One mocking look from his wife and a “Daddy, you’re brooding” from his daughter and he was all smiley face again.

He had ended his business trip early, like he did most of the time. He had shortened the last meeting, put on some casual clothes and took an early flight back home. He just couldn’t stay away from his family for too long, and with Emmy’s nightmare and the little time Felicity got to sleep because of Tommy he knew he had every good reason to tell himself it was necessary for him to come home earlier. Hopefully it was going to be the last business trip he had to go on to.

When the taxi stopped in front of the house he had built for his family, he hastily gave the driver the money, including a giant tip for driving a little faster than allowed, got his suitcase from the trunk and hurried to the door. He just couldn’t wait to see his family again. He wanted to kiss Felicity, hug Emmy close and hold little Tommy against his broad chest. Being away from those three seemed to get harder each time.

Oliver opened the door and almost expected his daughter to come running to him and jump up at him and hug him close and tell him how much she had missed him – but he knew better. Emmy’s priority was her little baby brother and since Oliver couldn’t hear him crying right now, he was probably an enjoyable companion for his sister right this second. She was probably pushing him around in his baby carriage. She loved doing that.

But he only needed to take a few steps into the house to see the baby carriage standing next to the stairs to the basement. So maybe it was feeding time and the three of them were snuggled up on the couch together. Emmy had a weird curiosity regarding Felicity’s breasts and the milk they fed Tommy. She always watched when Felicity breastfed the little boy, touched him or her breast, asking a thousand questions about where the milk came from, if he could drink from daddy’s breasts, too, and why Tommy wasn’t eating baby puree like other little children.

She was asking so many questions already. How was that supposed to intensify when she became three of four years old? Wasn’t that the time children usually asked a thousand questions about everything every day?

When Oliver stepped into the living room, he first thought that it was empty because the light was switched off, the curtains closed and everything was silent. But the moment he turned around to look for his loved ones upstairs, he heard a quiet sigh he would always recognize. A slight smile on the lips he took a few more steps into the dark room, moving as quietly as possible. Thanks to his nighttime job in the city his eyes adjusted to the dark of the room quickly.

Glancing over the backrest of the couch he found the sleeping form of at least one of his loved ones. Felicity was wrapped into a blanket, one arm used as a pillow for her head. She slept soundly with a slight smile playing around her lips. Stepping around the couch, he kneeled down in front of her. He reached out his hand to touch her, feel the warmth of her skin, but he stopped himself before the tips of his fingers could make contact. He knew how much she needed the rest, so he limited himself to just watching her. Oliver could do that forever. Sometimes when he had trouble sleeping he actually did.

The desire to touch her intensified with every second he watched her. So Oliver let his hand follow the silhouette of her body down to her hip and up again. He never touched her, though. His hand always stayed like an inch above her form. But the moment his hand hovered over her cheek, her hand suddenly reached out, took hold of his wrist and put his hand to her cheek. Oliver smiled softly and lowered his face to hers, pressing a soft kiss to the tip of her nose.

“You’re back,” she whispered with sleepy voice, snuggling her face into his touch and kissing his palm without opening his eyes. “Missed you.”

“I missed you, too,” Oliver replied quietly, nuzzling her nose. “I came back early.”

“I’m glad,” she sighed. “Give me a min-“

“No, no,” Oliver interrupted her hastily. “I didn’t mean to wake you. You sleep, I’ll take care of the kids.”

“Upstairs,” she mumbled, already falling asleep again. She said something else, but the words got lost since she rolled over to press her face in the fabric. Chuckling quietly, Oliver got up and headed to the stairs.

Halfway up the stairs Oliver could hear his daughter’s voice. She was randomly naming ingredients she needed from the supermarket, so she could cook her doll’s favorite dinner. Oliver’s newly discovered love for cooking told him that whatever she would cook for her doll, the doll could be glad she wouldn’t taste it. He tiptoed up the rest of the stairs, but stayed in front of her bedroom instead of entering it. The door was only left ajar, so he could hear everything she did and said. The little room between door and the frame didn’t give him enough room to see his daughter, though.

“And we need eggs,” she said, finishing her list of things she needed from the play shop. “I go to work. You go shopping. Take the baby. Be careful of his head.”

Oliver smiled lovingly. Emmy had learned a lot about how to handle babies since Tommy had been born. And she was giving her knowledge to everyone who listened – whether those were her stuffed animals, her dolls or-

“Okay, you’ll go to work, and I will take care of the kid.”

Ray Palmer.

Before Oliver knew what he was doing, he was already stepping away from where he was standing next to the door to enter his daughter’s room. Emmy wore her backpack that she always used as her briefcase when she was playing. For some reason it was always the mommy who was working when she played although since she was born, it had always been Oliver who had worked at Queen Consolidated and they hadn’t told her yet that Felicity was soon taking that role. Ray sat at the small children’s table, his legs outstretched to at least partly fit under the table. He held Emmy’s favorite doll in his hands, carefully supporting the head like the toddler had told him. The baby monitor for Tommy was attached to the waistband of Emmy’s pants.

“Daddy!”

The moment the toddler saw him she dropped the folders she had held in her hands to take with her to work. She immediately started running towards him and reached out her arms for him to lift her from the floor like he did immediately. The moment she was in his arms she formed her hands to fists in the neckline of his shirt and leaned over with closed eyes to kiss him.

Emmy always kissed him with her lips opened, “just like mommy!” No matter how often he tried to tell her that only mommy was allowed to kiss him like that, she did it over and over again because she loved him “just as much as mommy”. She also kissed Felicity like that because she loved her “just like daddy”.

“Hey, sweetie,” Oliver laughed after the kiss, leaning back a little to get a better look at his daughter, “what are you doing?”

“Nothing,” she said hastily.

“Nothing? I thought you were playing with Pa- Ray,” he hastily corrected himself, knowing that Felicity would hit the back of his head if she learned that he was still calling Ray ‘Palmer’, especially in front of Emmeline.

“Not anymore.”

“Not anymore?” Oliver asked, looking away from her and to Ray.

“Well, I stand no chance against her daddy,” he said with an amused laugh, putting the doll aside and getting up to shake Oliver’s hand.

Of course he didn’t stand a chance, Oliver thought a little mischievously. Emmy felt exactly that Oliver got tense when Ray was there. He knew that he didn’t have any reason to be jealous because Felicity loved him and only him and Ray wasn’t here to try and steal Felicity from him or anything. Still Oliver couldn’t forget that Ray and Felicity had been together, even if it had been because of his own stupid behavior. Emmy felt there was something wrong between her dad and Ray and hence didn’t like him.

Actually Oliver had never thought his daughter would let Ray play with her dolls or let him into her room in the first place.

“Ray, what a nice surprise,” Oliver said tensely. “I didn’t know you were in the city. Felicity didn’t say anything.”

“She didn’t know,” Ray admitted with a breathed laugh, “until I showed up in front of your door two hours ago. I was near Starling and thought I’d use the chance to come by and say hello. I thought I get another look at the young Queen boy. He is gorgeous.”

“Thank you,” Oliver said proudly, snuggling his cheek to his daughter’s head when she rested her head at his shoulder. “He is a great… especially when he is quiet. He is pretty exhausting.”

“Yeah, Felicity almost fell asleep while brewing coffee. So I offered to brew it, and she fell asleep, so Emmy suggested we should let her sleep, put Tommy to his crib and play here in her room.”

“Your idea?” Oliver asked, looking at his daughter. Emmeline lifted her head from his shoulder and nodded proudly. Oliver smiled at her.

“I guess someone is daddy’s little girl with all her heart?” Ray asked.

Oliver nodded, but Emmy shook her head. “Daddy’s big girl.”

Ray and Oliver both laughed at that.

“How about we go downstairs into the dining room?” Oliver asked Ray, gazing at the plastic mug that had been placed in the table in front of where Ray had sat before. “You can have real coffee there. And we won’t wake Felicity.”

“That would be nice, thank you,” Ray answered.

Oliver didn’t really desire to have coffee with his wife’s ex-boyfriend, but he knew that Felicity would be happy to wake up and see that Oliver treated her friend they way he deserved it and not the way his inappropriate jealousy told him to.

When they walked down the stairs, Emmy leaned her lips close to his ears and whispered as quietly as she possibly could, “Palmer was never alone with mommy. I was there.”

He didn’t know whether Ray had heard, but he didn’t say anything and neither did Oliver. He just smiled proudly, unable to hide it. She hadn’t played with Palmer because she had changed her mind about him or something. He had done it to keep him away from Felicity because she had known that Oliver always tensed when Ray and Felicity interacted, no matter how innocently it was.

Emmy was his big girl.  
Nothing was ever going to change that.


	85. Body issues

Oliver was worried, seriously worried.

Leaning against the kitchen counter, Oliver downed the rest of his coffee, never taking his eyes off his wife, who was sitting cross-legged on the couch with Tommy sleeping on a pillow on her legs and Emmy leaning over from the side, rubbing her little brother’s back. The toddler, like every morning, asked her mother a thousand questions about her baby brother, and Felicity answered each of them with a smile and wise words.

Everyone who would look at her being like that would argue that Oliver was overly worried and that Felicity was fine. And at the beginning of the week Oliver would have agreed and waved his worries off, but not anymore.

It had started on Monday. After dinner Felicity had told him that the doctor had given his go for them to have sex again because her wounds were healed and she was okay again. So when they had lain down in bed that night, and Felicity had leaned over to kiss him goodnight, he had held her to him, deepening the kiss. But Felicity had pulled away, whispering that she just wasn’t in the right mood and he had apologized for misinterpreting her signs, but she had waved it off and they had snuggled up to one another like they always did.  
Later that night Oliver had woken to the feeling of Felicity’s soft lips on his neck and her hand drifting lower and lower on his stomach until her fingers had moved under the waistband of his boxer briefs and cupped his erection. When he had asked her what she was doing, she had only laughed and asked whether her attentions weren’t obvious. She had rolled herself onto him and had freed his cock from the fabric of the boxer briefs to sink down on him. She had ridden him torturously slowly with her hands on his chest to keep him down. Oliver had let her take control completely, watching as much as the darkness had allowed him how her face had changed the more her pleasure had increased and letting the wonderful picture of his wife riding him while wearing nothing but one of his shirts sink into his brain.  
When Oliver had tugged at the hem of her shirt, intending to lift it, Felicity had leaned down and pressed her body to his, effectively catching the fabric between their bodies. She had moaned into his ear that she was so close and only a few seconds later they had fallen apart in each other’s arms.

As soon as he had woken up the next morning, he had reached out his hand to feel her warm body next to him, but found that the other side of the bed had been empty. The sounds from the shower had given away where Felicity had been, though. So he had climbed out of bed, intending to join her and add perfectly lazy morning sex to the pleasure of the night before. But the door had been locked, something that had never happened before. And when Oliver had knocked quietly, Felicity had explained that she must have locked the door on accident. He had only chuckled and stated that she had locked out morning sex with him since he couldn’t be late to work due to an important appointment.

After he had sat Emmeline down in front of a cartoon on Wednesday, he had come into the kitchen to help Felicity clean up the dishes from dinner since their dishwasher had flooded half of the kitchen earlier the day and hadn’t been able to be used that evening. But as soon as he had rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt, Felicity had taken his hand and pulled him closer to her until she had been caged between his body and the kitchen counter. One smug look from her beautiful, blue eyes and her intention had been clear. He had lifted her on the countertop and had hastily tugged down her panties while she had unbuckled his belt and opened his pants. They had skipped foreplay and jumped to the main event instead. Under her rough whispers to go faster and harder he had made her come within only few minutes, and he had followed her into oblivion shortly after.

On Thursday Felicity had accompanied him to Queen Consolidated where they had presented their plan of letting Felicity run the company soon to the board. And as soon as his assistant Emily had left for lunch, Felicity had sat down on his desk, spread her legs and made a come-here-gesture with her index finger. Oliver had complied immediately, stepping between her legs and meeting her lips in a rough kiss. What would have followed would have been the third sex since Tommy’s birth, but unfortunately they had been interrupted by a member of the tech department before that could have happened. They had parted, both hungry for more.

Until then Oliver had been fine. He hadn’t had any worries because it had seemed like no worries had been needed. Everything had seemed fine. Until last night.

After the kids had both been put to bed and had fallen asleep, Oliver had crawled into bed to Felicity, and he had leaned over to give her the usual goodnight kiss. But Felicity had kept him in place, deepening the kiss the way he had done a few days before. And when he had slowly lowered his weight onto her, she had reached out her hand to switch off the light. Oliver had had other plans, though, so he had caught her fingers and held them in his own, never stopping kissing her. When his lips had started kissing down a path from her lips to her neck, she had asked him to switch off the light, but he had only groaned against the skin of her neck. She had asked once more, but Oliver had only mumbled that he wanted to see her which had been true. He loved seeing Felicity’s naked body move when they had sex. And he loved exploring every inch of her skin with his hands, his lips, his tongue, his teeth and his eyes, no matter how often he had done that before and how detailed her body was already memorized in his brain, his heart and his soul. But she had only repeated that he should switch off the light, her voice sounding tense and maybe even a little bit scared, and that had been the moment Oliver had first started to worry.

He had recalled every possible memory of her since Tommy’s birth and he had cursed himself for not noticing it sooner. He should have. He should have noticed sooner.

Felicity was avoiding being naked in front of him.

She locked the bathroom door when she took a shower. She dressed or wrapped herself in a towel after she left the bathroom. She kept her clothes on during sex.

Oliver loved sex with Felicity, no matter where they did it or how they did it, so he didn’t bother about the lack of seeing his wife naked itself. What did bother him, though, was the lack of confident Felicity seemed to have in her own body.

He had wanted to talk to her as soon as he had noticed, but Tommy had started crying and Felicity had left the bed as quickly as possible. And when she had crawled back into bed, all she had done was falling on her side of the bed and falling asleep as soon as her head had touched the pillow and she had only woken up when Tommy had demanded his first milk early in the morning. So there hadn’t been any time to talk to her yet.

Oliver watched Felicity putting Tommy in the small crib they had placed right next to the couches, so the baby boy could stay in their reach even when he was asleep during the day. As soon as she got up, Emmy slid over to take Felicity’s place on the couch to be as close to her brother as possible. Just like before, when her little brother had been lying on the pillow in Felicity’s lap, the toddler started rubbing her brother’s tummy gently.

“Don’t you need to go to work?” Felicity asked, approaching him.

She was right, Oliver noticed with a glance at his watch. If he wanted to be in time to prepare himself for the meeting he had later the day, he would have to go now. And talking about what current problems Felicity had with her body shouldn’t be done in a hurry.

“Yeah, you’re right,” he said with a sigh, putting his mug away and lifting his hands to adjust his tie.

Immediately Felicity stepped in front of him, slapping his hands away. She turned up the collar of his dress shirt and adjusted his tie, taking all the time in the world. And only when she seemed completely satisfied by her doing, she put the collar back in place. Smiling at him, she stroked her hands down his chest to smooth creases that weren’t there. She hooked her index fingers in the belt loops and pulled him closer, straightening up onto her toes at the same time.

Their lips met in a gentle kiss, just brushing against each other’s for two, three, four times. Only then she pressed her lips to his a little more firmly. The touch was still gentle, though. Their lips stayed locked to each other’s without moving. Oliver felt her pulling back way too soon for his liking and he hastily framed her face with his hands, feeling the soft skin of her cheeks under the rough tips of his fingers. He opened her lips to him with his tongue, and she granted him entrance, so he immediately started to explore the inside of her mouth. Sighing, she leaned completely against him, responding to the kiss just as gently as he was kissing her.

How could Felicity be insecure about her body? Had he ever given her any reason to doubt that he desired every inch of her skin? Admittedly, he had fallen in love with her soul, but that didn’t mean that he loved her body any less. She was hot, sexy, beautiful, all the things he had told her again and again since they were together. Maybe he hadn’t said it for too long.

He moved his hands down her back and to her butt, squeezing gently, and immediately Felicity pulled away and took a step back.

“Oliver, there are children present,” she whispered with an amused laugh, the kind of laugh that didn’t show any insecurities.

Oliver shot a glance to where Emmy was still sitting in front of the TV. She had moved from the couch into the crib, so she could be even closer to her brother. Her legs were outstretched to both sides of Tommy, so he was lying between them. All her focus was on the baby, the movie Felicity had switched on for her seemed forgotten.

“I don’t think they take notice of us,” Oliver simply replied.

Felicity smiled softly when she said, “You gotta go. Work is waiting for you.”

Oliver sighed but nodded. Taking his suit jacket from the backrest of the chair, he stepped in front of her and kissed her once more, limiting himself to a quick peck to her lips. Felicity hummed contently.

“See you later,” she said.

“I’ll call you after lunch.”

She nodded. “Bye.”

There was no point in staying and talking to her now. Besides, he hadn’t even figured out what to say yet. So Oliver left. He took his briefcase from where he always put it next to the bottom of the stairs and stepped outside, heading towards the car. He put the briefcase to the passenger seat and hung up the suit jacket on the little hook next to the door to the passenger seat. Oliver reached his hand out to the back pocket of his pants to put his wallet to the briefcase because it was always uncomfortable to sit on it during driving. But he realized that he had forgotten to take it with him after he had had his last coffee, so he headed back to the house.

“I just forgot my wallet!” Oliver shouted when he opened the door and reentered the house, leaving the door open since he was going to leave again in two seconds anyway.

He hurried into the kitchen from where he could see Emmy in the exactly same position she had been in before. He took a quick look around and frowned.

“Where is mommy?” he asked.

“Shower,” Emmy answered, not taking her eyes off her little brother.

The hand Oliver had already reached out for his wallet stopped and hovered in the air. He pulled the hand back and glanced at his watch.

He was late for work already. He didn’t have any meetings until the afternoon, but he needed to read some contracts, make up his mind for some final decisions he had to make before Felicity would take over his job in the company. He needed the morning for that.

But what he needed the morning even more for was to remind his wife of how beautiful she was and how much he loved every curve of her body and every inch of her skin. The sooner he reminded her of how much he desired each part of her, body and soul, the better.

Oliver slowly approached Emmy and leaned over the backrest of the couch, propped up onto his forearms. The toddler turned her had to her father, smiling at him shortly before she lowered her gaze to her baby brother.

“He’s sleeping,” she explained him.

“Right,” Oliver confirmed with a nod of his head, “and that is why you need to do daddy a favor. Can you do that?”

“I’m not leaving Tommy,” she stated immediately and grabbed her brother’s little legs gently.

“That is actually what I was going to ask you,” Oliver said with a smile. “I want you to stay downstairs and watch Tommy. And you cannot leave him. If he starts crying, you stay here and call for mommy or me, okay?”

Emmy nodded proudly and Oliver kissed his daughter’s head.  
Other parents might have doubts if leaving a toddler alone with a baby was the right thing to do, but Oliver knew that Tommy would sleep for the next two hours because as little as the young boy wanted to sleep during the night, as much did he enjoy his sleep in the morning. And Emmy was the best babysitter possible. She loved her little brother more than anything and leaving her alone with Tommy for a short while was nothing Oliver would ever feel uncomfortable about as long as an adult was only one shout away. Emmy knew what she was allowed to do and what she wasn’t allowed to do with her brother.  
Playing wildly and touching forcefully? Nope.  
Tummy or back rubs and gentle cuddling? Sure.

With Emmy it was as simple as that.

Oliver closed the front door when he passed it and headed upstairs. He slowly crossed the hallway, trying to figure out which bathroom Felicity used, and couldn’t help the smug grin that spread on his lips when he heard the rushing of water from near their bedroom. Felicity was using the en-suite bathroom, lovely called the sex-bathroom since when Felicity woke up in the morning while Oliver was in the shower, she almost always crawled out of bed and joined him. At least that was how it had been before she had started hiding her body from him.

He snuck through the corridor, finding that both the bedroom door and the door to the bathroom were left ajar. That worked perfectly for what he had in mind, Oliver thought, slipping out of his shoes and socks in the bedroom before stepping in front of the door to the bathroom. He opened the door as quietly as possible and although there was a low noise, Felicity didn’t seem to hear it over the sounds of the shower.

She stood under the stream of water, her eyes closed. Oliver would have thought that she was relaxing if he hadn’t seen the wrinkle between her eyebrows and the way her fingers moved over the slightly red mark that reminded of where she had been cut open for the emergency c-section that had been necessary to save her and Tommy’s life.

Not caring about his clothes or anything else, Oliver opened the door to the shower. This time Felicity heard the sound the door made. Gasping for breath, she took a step back and turned around, so her back was pressed against the wall tiles and she was facing him. Her eyes snapped open and immediately her hands came in front of her lower stomach, hiding the scar she had explored with her fingers before.

“Oliver!” she yelped. “You scared the hell out of me! What are you doing?”

His answer was a smug smile as he stepped into the shower, the water soaking his clothes immediately. But Oliver didn’t care. He kept his eyes straight on Felicity’s face and came closer until he stood right in front of her and he could put his arms to the wall next to her body, caging her in.

“What do you think I am doing?” he asked, his voice sounding hoarse.

He knew that he couldn’t just give in to the love and passion and lust he already felt within him. This wasn’t just about to have mind-blowing sex. This was about making Felicity feel confident about her body again. Because what was there not to love about it? Oliver slid his hands closer to one another on the wall, so his wrists were touching Felicity’s naked skin and he could feel goose bumps erupting on her skin where he touched her.

“It looks like you are ruining your very expensive suit,” Felicity replied.

Oliver’s smile widened. He looked into Felicity’s eyes for three more heartbeats before he lowered his head to her neck, whispering, “Cold, Felicity. Very cold.”

His lips made contact with her wet skin. He pressed feathery kisses against the side of her neck, enjoying how she moaned lowly. Slowly he let his hands move down to the height of her hips, then detached them from the tiles to cup her butt instead and just like he had done before in the kitchen, he squeezed gently.

“Oliver!” Felicity screeched, but he didn’t miss the tone of arousal in her voice. “We can’t do this!”

“No children present,” Oliver mumbled against her neck, opening his lips to flick his tongue over her pulse point and suck the skin into his mouth shortly. He glanced down her body shortly, finding that her arms still covered most of her stomach.

“But you have to go to work,” she replied.

“I’m the boss. I don’t have to do anything,” Oliver almost grumbled, squeezing her butt once again and pulling her hips closer to his, so he could rub himself against her through his wet pants. “So I don’t _have_ to do anything, but what I _want_ to do is taking a shower with my beautiful wife.”

“Oliver…”

It wasn’t the way she’d usually say his name under these circumstances. It wasn’t a moan of pleasure that encouraged him to continue and let him know how much she enjoyed what he was doing. Instead there was hesitation in it and when Oliver saw her arms wrapping a little more tightly around herself, making sure she wouldn’t give away the cover, Oliver pulled back slightly. He slid his hands from her hips over her back to her shoulders, shortly caressing the scar from the shot wound she had gained years ago with his fingertips, and finally to her face to cup it gently. He wiped his thumbs over her cheekbones and smiled at her worriedly.

“Felicity,” he said with his voice only barely louder than a whisper, “I-“

“Not here,” Felicity hurried to say, making his hands loosen from her face, and stepped away from him and out of the shower, wrapping wet body into one of the towels, before she turned back around to him. “Get into some dry clothes and then we can talk.”

Oliver nodded and Felicity disappeared. With a low sigh, he turned off the shower and stepped outside, taking off the soaked through clothes and drying himself with a towel.

A few years ago he would have seduced her and used his body and the knowledge he had of her body and what she enjoyed during sex to make her fall back in love with her body. He would still do that, but first they would talk. In all the years he knew Felicity now he had become pretty good at talking. He opened up to her about everything that bothered him and he did his best to find the right words when she opened up to him. So he was going to listen to what she had to say and he was going to tell her what he hoped would help her. And then he would follow up his words with actions and prove to her that he meant every single word.

When most of the water had been dried from his skin, Oliver grabbed the sweatpants he had left on the rim of the bathtub last night and made his way to the bedroom. Felicity sat on the bed, dressed in the one of his shirts she slept in currently. Her head was lowered, her gaze fixed on her hands in her lap. The curtain of her wet, curly hair that was falling into her face blocked his sight on her facial expression.

Oliver strolled over to her slowly, clearing his throat to make sure she knew that he was there. He didn’t want to frighten her with what she would call his ‘ninja skills’. Felicity looked up to him as soon as he sat down on the mattress next to her. Leaning over, she pressed her lips to his gently. When their lips parted, Felicity moved close to him on the bed and put her legs on top of his thighs to be closer to him. Her hands grabbed his, holding onto them, while she was saying, “It is ugly.”

Right to the topic, Oliver noticed with surprise. He had thought that she would try to talk around the core of the problem, but was more than pleased that she didn’t. He loved that they had this connection of love and trust.

“It’s actually more than ugly. It’s… gross,” she corrected herself. “Like… there is that scar and it is not one of those nice, badass scars, no, it is just an ugly, really gross scar. And I gained seventeen kilogram during pregnancy, and I only lost ten of them since Tommy was born. So I have an ugly scar and I am fat.”

Oliver frowned. He had known that it had been about her not feeling confident in her own skin, but hearing the exact words hurt even more then he had expected. So Oliver hesitated.

“That means that seven kilogram are still not gone,” Felicity said when he didn’t say anything, “just in case you were trying to calculate that.”

When Felicity cracked a small smile, he reached out his hands to wrap his arms around her waist and pull her onto his lap. Immediately Felicity’s arms came to rest around her neck.

“First of all,” Oliver began, pinching her into the side and making her laugh quietly, “be nice!”

Felicity put her hand to his chin and bent his head back a little more, so she could kiss Oliver lovingly. It was only a short peck to the lips, but it was perfect nonetheless.

“Secondly, why would that scar be any less badass than you think mine are?” he asked, cocking his head. “You got this scar because you had a fight against death, and you got out of it alive. You fought like hell to make sure that I wouldn’t have to lose Tommy or you. That scar is way more badass than any of the scars I gained within the last years.”

“But-“

Oliver silenced her objection with a short kiss.

“But-“

Again he pressed his lips to hers, a little bit longer this time.

“But-“

Putting a hand to the back of her neck, he kissed her once more. This time his tongue moved out to open her lips to him and he let the tip of his tongue move against hers shortly before he bit down on her bottom lip gently and brushed his lips against hers once more. Only then did he pull back. And Felicity’s objection seemed to be silenced completely which she confirmed with a short nod of her head.

“And thirdly, you are not fat and I don’t ever want to hear that from you again,” he said determinedly.

Felicity cocked her head. “Short reminder that I am your wife and not your daughter.”

Oliver smirked. “Wife. Right. That reminds me of something.”

Scooping her up into his arms with one arm around her waist and the other under her knees, Oliver got up from the bed but only to turn around and lie her down on the middle of the mattress. Taking in how she was lying spread out in front of him, Oliver put both his hands to her knees and moved them up her naked thighs slowly. Her skin was warm and soft. Goosebumps spread on her skin where the rough tips of his fingers touched her body.

He put his hands on her hips above the shirt she wore and pushed her further up the bed, so he could crawl onto it, too, his head at the level of her hips and his body resting in between her spread legs. Felicity’s eyes were closed and when his hands moved from her clothes-covered hips and down to her naked thighs again, a low sigh escaped her full lips and Oliver smiled at the content sound.

Felicity was fine again. Her doubts had been way less serious than he had feared when the little talk had helped her already. She had probably just obsessed about it because she had kept it to herself. So maybe it wasn’t that bad. Still, Oliver would show to Felicity how much he actually loved her and how much he desired her body. So when his hands were back down on her knees, he pushed them back up the outside of her thighs even more slowly than before. When he passed the hem of her shirt at the upper half of her thigh this time, he let his fingers move under the fabric.

But he felt Felicity tense at the touch. It was only a slight tension, barely sensible for someone who wasn’t overly aware of every movement and every feeling of his partner. So he kept his hands where they were, only moving the tips of his fingers in little circles on her skin. Oliver watched Felicity’s face closely to make sure that it wasn’t too much and he wasn’t pushing too much and he sighed soundlessly when he saw that her facial expression relaxed slowly. Gradually the tension ceased from her body and Oliver let his fingers slowly move further up her legs to her hips. Even before his fingers had taken hold of the fabric of her panties, Felicity lifted her hips from the mattress, allowing Oliver to tug the garment off as soon as he had gripped it.

With the lower half of her body completely naked, Oliver slid down the bed a little, his hands staying on her hips even when he started kissing the inside of her right knee. A series of butterfly kisses took an invisible path up the inside of her thigh. With every inch he got closer to her center, Felicity started squirming more, but unlike other time when she had wanted to move away from him, she moved closer towards him now. Low sighs and quiet moans were escaping her lips and when his lips started exploring the upper half of her thigh, her right hand came to grip his hair and pull him closer.

“Oliver.”

He took in a deep breath at the sound of her name in that special tone of her voice. There was lust and hunger in it, the pleading for him to move closer to where she wanted him the most and all the love he knew she felt for him.

And Oliver didn’t want to wait any longer. He put his lips against her wet folds, his tongue moving out to lick the wetness that had already covered her sex into his mouth. The familiar sweet scent and taste of her juices made him smile against her. He had missed this. Lying with his head between her thighs, exploring the most sensitive parts of her body like he had a thousand times before and not only breathing her in, but also eating her out – something about that made him feel whole and healed and he knew that Felicity felt the same. She had told him more than once.

When the tip of his tongue moved against her clit, Felicity gasped for breath and the sound made Oliver growing harder in his sweatpants. But he didn’t want her to come just yet. He wanted to tease her a little while longer, make her say his name in the most pleading ways a little more often.

So he moved his tongue back between her folds licking there. Her hips moved more strongly now since she tried to get his tongue and lips where she wanted them the most. But Oliver put his arms above her hips to keep them still onto the mattress and he couldn’t help chuckling against her when she groaned. Both of their movement caused his beard to scratch the inside of her thighs. He knew it was going to leave red marks there, and he knew how much she would love that.

“Oliver,” she almost growled, but it ended in a moan when his tongue dipped lower and entered her, liking her inner walls. Her hand gripped his hair more tightly, pulling his face closer to her. Her hips still tried to move, but the hold he had on her hips was too strong for her to do so.

He was going slow, licking the silken skin of her center as slowly as possible without going insane himself. He wanted to take his time, enjoying every moment and having her enjoy every moment. With every lick of his tongue, he felt himself harden more. The desire to be inside of her and unite their bodies completely increased quickly, but Oliver knew that he had a mission here and that mission demanded time, a lot of time. So Oliver continued to go slow, lick her precisely without ever touching any too sensitive spot. Whenever he felt her coming to close to her climax, he pulled back, teasing her lower lips without entering again until he was sure that she wasn’t as close anymore.

“Oliver,” she moaned for the umpteenth time, her head rolling from the right side to the left and back again. “Please, Oliver, please!”

Without taking his lips off of her, he gazed up her upper body to her face. Her eyes were still screwed shut, her lips opened while she was panting. He could see how desperately she wanted to come.

Slowly he rubbed the thumb of the hand that wasn’t holding her to the bed over where he knew was the scar from the C-section above the fabric of the shirt she wore. Felicity got the hint immediately. She loosened the hand that was clinging to his forearm with her nails digging into his skin painfully and pushed the hand that rubbed her scar under the fabric, so he could touch it. As soon as he felt the small line of uneven skin under the tips of his fingers, he pushed his tongue deeper into her and against the riffled skin there while his nose bumped against her clit. The arm that held her to the bed loosened, so Felicity could move against him.

Within seconds he felt her whole body tightening. Her back arched off the bed, her hips bucked against his lips. And then she came. Her inner walls tightened around his tongue and her panting stopped when her mouth fell open in a soundless cry.

Oliver let her ride out her orgasm against his face. When her body fell back into the pillows limply, he pressed a single short kiss against her clit, making her body shiver, and then pulled back. He hastily wiped her juices off his face while sitting back on his feet and taking her hands in his to pull her into an upright decision. Even before he had gripped the fabric of the shirt, she lifted her hands above her head, so he could take it off, leaving her completely naked.

Felicity reached out her hands and started tugging at the fabric of his sweatpants to take them off, so Oliver got up on his knees and helped her. The moment his erection sprang free, Felicity let go of his sweatpants to stroke up and down his shaft instead. Oliver was barely able to take the pants off the rest of the way. His hips thrust into her hands on own instinct and he groaned lowly with each time Felicity’s hands move over the tip of his cock.

“Felicity,” he growled breathlessly, when her fists tighten around him, pumping him gently. “You should better stop doing that if you want to come again.”

With that being said, Oliver leaned forward and pressed his lips to Felicity’s in a hungry kiss. He slowly lowered his body onto her until he was covering above her with his weight propped up onto his forearms to not crush her. She wrapped her arms around him, scratching her nails down his back. He growled into her mouth while simultaneously taking one of her hands from his back to hold it into his next to her head.

He lowered the lower part of his body, so his erection slid between her wet folds. The contact of hot, sensitive skin to hot, sensitive skin made both of them growl. Their kiss deepened, became more fiercely. Their hips were moving against each other’s, seeking the way to get the most pleasure.

“Felicity,” he growled once more.

There was no need to say anything else. She knew exactly what he meant with that growl, so she parted her lips from his. Oliver used the opportunity to kiss down her neck, sucking at her pulse point.

“Oliver, please,” she begged, telling him that she was just as ready as he had told her with the growl of her name.

So Oliver reached between them, took hold of his cock that was already covered in her juices and positioned it at her entrance.

“Felicity,” he whispered with a groan, bumping his nose against hers lovingly to make her look at him. He waited until her eyes opened, her gaze focusing on his face as much as the pleasure allowed it.

He slowly thrust into her, so very, very slowly. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip and her eyelids fluttered with the need to fall shut, but she managed to keep them open. When Oliver was inside of her completely, they stayed unmoving for a while, just losing themselves in each other’s eyes and breathing the same air.

Only when Felicity wrapped her legs high around Oliver’s middle, making him sink into her more deeply, Oliver put his free hand behind her knee, massaging the back of her thigh gently. The other hand still held Felicity’s hand, his fingers tightening around hers more when he slowly pulled out and sank back in. Felicity moaned, digging her nails into the skin of his hands and his back forcefully.

They moved in perfect harmony. Oliver only slid out slightly and then thrust back into her slowly but firmly. Felicity met his thrusts with an uplift of her hips whenever his hips moved down into her. Only their loud breathing, pants mixed with low moans and quiet sighs, filled the air of their bedroom.

It didn’t take long until they were both feeling the pleasure increasing with each and every movement. Felicity’s walls fluttered around him already and Oliver knew it was only a matter of second for the both of them to come. So he lowered his lips to the crook of her neck, sucking at her pulse point firmly.

“Oliver,” Felicity moaned and Oliver hastily loosened his lips from her neck to look right into her face.

“Felicity,” he breathed just loud enough for her to hear and she opened her eyes to look at him right in time before her back arched of the bed and against him, her clit rubbed against his pubic bone and with a low cry she came once again. Her hips moved slowly against his while he kept thrusting in and out of her, watching her face intensely. Only a few more thrusts and he came inside of her, causing a mini orgasm to run through her.

He pressed his lips to hers, kissing her fiercely while the last waves of their orgasms rushed through their veins. When he could finally move again, he slowly lowered the upper part of his body to hers, so he could rest his head right above her breasts and snuggle his cheeks to her skin while listening to the wild beating of her heart.

“Is that okay?” he asked after a while.

“Perfect,” Felicity sighed confidently and wrapped her arms around him, cradling his face to her chest and playing with his short hair. “Let’s just stay like this forever.”

Oliver closed his eyes and turned his head to press a short kiss to her skin. When he snuggled his cheek back to her chest, Felicity gently scratched his beard. There were probably going to stick marks of beard burn not only at the insides of her thighs but also on her chest.

“Forever sounds good,” he sighed just as contently as she had before.

“But you have to go to work,” Felicity reminded him sleepily.

“I can go to work later. I am just going to stay here for a little while longer.”

“How much longer?”

“Like you said, forever sounds perfect.”

Felicity chuckled tiredly, her right hand stroking over his hair. Then she asked, “Where are the kids?”

“Downstairs. I told Emmy to watch out for her little brother.”

“Poor Tommy,” Felicity chuckled. “Emmy’s going to stare at him the entire time. The little boy is probably scared to death.”

“He was sleeping when I went upstairs.”

“Then he is probably waking up any second and wants to be fed,” Felicity replied with another low sigh and snuggled her cheek to the top of his head.

They both weren’t too excited about leaving this perfect moment of closeness just yet. They knew they had to sooner or later, but with Oliver still being inside of her and their bodies wrapped around each other so tightly, it was just perfect. Especially with Tommy being so young still, it was hard to find moments like these where it could be just them for longer than five minutes.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me for sex. You weren’t so bad yourself,” he joked, making Felicity burst into full laughter.

Oliver propped himself up onto his forearms to look at her, enjoying the joy he could see in her face.

“Felicity?” he said after half a minute and immediately all her intention focused on her. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied.

“And you’re beautiful.”

“Well, you don’t look too bad yourself,” she mimicked his mocking voice from before.

They both laughed joyfully and cuddled some more before the voice of their daughter reminded them on their parental duties and pulled them out of the intimate moment for this morning. Oliver and Felicity both agreed to just continue where they had stopped later today when the kids were safely sleeping in Tommy’s bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For everyone I don’t get to speak to again before Thursday - Merry Christmas!


	86. Doing what we love

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

 “Can I ask a question?”

“Sure, hon,” Felicity answered with a smile and sent a quick prayer to heaven that her nosy, little girl was going to ask something she was actually able to answer in some way her daughter would understand because lately the questions Emmeline had asked had resulted in a long babble about complicated scientific things that had only made her confused.

“Why does Tommy always get the same food?” she asked, a frown forming on her forehead while she was watching her mother cradling little Tommy to her chest and breastfeeding him. “Doesn’t he get tired of it?”

“No, I don’t think so,” Felicity explained with a soft smile, happy that most of her daughter’s worries were about her baby brother possibly not feeling comfortable. “The milk is very healthy for little babies. When you were as young as Tommy is now, you were breastfed, too.”

“Really?” she asked with wide eyes.

Felicity nodded. “Really.”

For some time Emmy said nothing. Then the frown on her forehead deepened and she said, “I don’t remember that.”

“Well, you were very little,” Felicity replied, loosening one hand from Tommy to put it to her daughter’s head and gently stroke over her blonde curls. “You cannot remember what has happened when you were so young.”

Emmy nodded, sighing loudly. Felicity smiled at her daughter. She was so nosy and asked at least a hundred questions each day. It was just sweet how interested she was in everything and everyone around her.   
Why is water wet?  
Why was that woman in the supermarket sitting in a wheelchair?  
How did Tommy get into mommy’s stomach and how did he did get out?  
Am I going to die one day?

Most of the times Felicity and Oliver found an answer that was at least satisfying enough for Emmeline to nod her head and ask a new and most of the time completely different question. The number of questions the little girl had didn’t seem to ever decrease. One question was followed by another. And unfortunately often the one that followed was even harder to answer than the one before.

“Mommy?” Emmeline asked after a while.

“Yes, sweetie?” Felicity answered once more.

“Can I ask another question?”

“Sure, hon.”

Felicity smiled softly. It was always the same dance, always the same choice of words from both of them.

“How does it taste?”

“The milk?” Felicity asked.

Emmy nodded. “Like the milk I drink?”

“No,” Felicity answered, shaking her head, “I don’t think so.”

“Can I try it?”

“Um…” Felicity made with surprise and looked from Emmy to Tommy and back to Emmy once again. She distantly remembered reading something about that in the book about how to help your toddler adjust to the new baby. That book had been of no use for them since Emmy had been so happy about her little brother she hadn’t needed any time to adjust to the new situation. But maybe now for the first time the book would have a good use. “Sure, sweetie. Can you just please go into the kitchen and grab the bottle and the breast pump from the kitchen counter?”

Nodding, Emmeline slid off from the couch and Felicity listened to the tripping steps of her daughter as she was running into the kitchen to get the things Felicity had asked her for. She knew exactly what a breast pump was since she had been watching Felicity breastfeeding Tommy and pumping up milk often and she had asked a thousand questions about it during that time. When the toddler returned from the kitchen, Felicity lifted Tommy who had obviously fallen asleep during his meal to her lips and pressed a kiss to the little baby’s forehead. Emmy climbed back onto the couch and Felicity lowered Tommy in between her crossed legs with his head resting on the insider of her knee. While Felicity took the bottle and the breast pump, Emmeline leaned over her little brother and kissed his little forehead lovingly.

When there was a little milk in the bottle, Felicity put away the breast pump and gave the bottle to Emmeline. The toddler observed the liquid suspiciously, putting her nose in it to find out how it smelled. Felicity watched Emmy with a bright smile on her lips and put Oliver’s grey hoody back on. Smelling once more, the toddler cautiously put the bottle to her lips and sipped at the milk. Felicity bit her tongue and tried her best not to burst out into laughter at the face Emmeline made.

“Urgh!” Emmy made, scrunching her nose. “Gross! Mommy, can’t Tommy have anything else?”

Felicity chuckled. “Sorry, sweetie, but Tommy needs the milk. It helps him to grow.”

“He could stay so small. He’s sweet.”

“No, Tommy really needs to grow. You’re sweet as you are, too, and yet you want to grow.”

“Until I look like you,” Emmy confirmed with a nod of her head.

“And he likes the milk,” Felicity added.

Emmy frowned at her sleeping brother, then looked up at her mom with the same confused expression in her eyes as before. “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why does he like it?”

“People like different things,” Felicity reminded her daughter. “Like daddy loves extra hot chili and mommy feels like her whole body is on fire whenever she even smells it.”

Laughing, Emmeline put the bottle to the couch table and snuggled up to her mother’s side, watching her baby brother. Felicity put her arm around her daughter and put the other hand on her son’s tummy, rubbing his stomach and feeling his fast heartbeat under the palm of her hand.

There were only three more months until she would go back to work after all those years she had spent being a stay-at-home mom. Most of the time she was more than excited about going back to work, especially when Tommy was crying all day and nothing could calm him down, but in a quiet, comfortable moment like this Felicity knew it wasn’t going to be easy. She would miss her kids like crazy when they didn’t were around all the time.

They hadn’t told Emmy yet, but they were planning on doing so this week. It was time for the little girl to learn the news, so she could adjust to it. Hopefully she was going to adjust to that news as well as she had adjusted to the news of getting a baby brother.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“I’m hungry.”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed. “I’m actually hungry, too. How about pasta for dinner?”

“Yes!” Emmy shouted delightedly and clapped her hands, but hastily stopped when she remembered that her little brother was sleeping right next to her. So she put her fingers onto her lips and hushed herself. “Pssst! Tommy’s sleeping.”

“So I guess I won’t get a loud screech to be welcomed back home?”

Felicity and Emmeline both turned their heads to see Oliver leaning in the door frame. He had taken off the jacket of his suit and rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt. He looked sexy as hell with his arms crossed in front of his chest. It was definitely a sight she was going to miss when he wasn’t going to work anymore and quit wearing suits every day.

“How long have you been standing there?” Felicity asked when Oliver crossed the distance to lean over the backrest of the couch, immediately being pulled into a tight hug and being attacked with gentle kisses by his daughter.

“Not long,” Oliver replied with a chuckle and framed Emmeline’s face with his calloused hands to kiss her first on the forehead, then on the tip of her nose and finally on her lips. “Hi, sweetie.”

“Hi, daddy,” she said.

“Had a great day with mommy and Tommy?”

“Always,” Emmy replied, letting go of Oliver to snuggle back to Felicity.

Oliver turned his head and now framed his wife’s face, kissing her gently from upside down while his fingers were caressing the soft skin of her cheeks.

“Hi,” he breathed against her lips.

“Hi,” she whispered back and brushed her nose against his. “How was your day?”

“Getting better with every second,” Oliver replied before kissing her once more.

When he pulled back, they shared a look. With Tommy being fast asleep and the comfortableness of the evening, this seemed to be the perfect timing for them to tell Emmy what changes there were going to come in a few weeks. They both nodded slightly in agreement and Oliver stepped around the couch to sit down next to Felicity and wrap an arm around her. Just like Emmeline had before, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Tommy’s forehead. Felicity heard him whispering some Russian words into the baby’s ear before he straightened back up.

“Emmy, we need to talk to you,” Oliver said, tightening his hold on Felicity. He looked at Emmeline who moved slightly, so she could still sit snuggled up to her mother, but look at both of her parents. “We have news for you.”

“Are we having another baby?” Emmeline asked with wide eyes and her whole face brightened up in joy at the thought.

Oliver and Felicity both chuckled.

“No, hon,” Felicity replied and Emmy pursed her lips, pouting slightly. “But it is great news nonetheless because daddy is going to be home more often now.”

“Yes?” Emmy asked, her face lightning up again although compared to the joy about having another baby sibling it was much less excitement.

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a short nod of his head. “In a few weeks daddy will be able to be home every day because mommy will do daddy’s work in the office.”

Felicity watched her daughter’s face closely, waiting for her face to brighten up in the greatest excitement possible again. But Emmeline just continued to sit there and stare at her parents like she was waiting for more to come.

“So… what do you say?” Oliver asked slightly nervously.

A slight frown built on Emmeline’s forehead. And she looked from Oliver to Felicity, back to Oliver and finally to Felicity once more. The wrinkle between her eyebrows only deepened.

“Who’s gonna feed Tommy?” she asked.

“Daddy’s gonna do that,” Felicity answered and bit her tongue when Emmy’s eyes lowered to Oliver’s chest.

Leaning in close, she whispered into Felicity’s ear, “Is there milk in daddy’s breasts, too?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a wide grin. “But we can put milk from my breasts into bottles and that is how daddy can feed Tommy.”

“And who’s gonna cook?”

“Daddy’s gonna do that, too,” Oliver answered.

“Pancakes and bacon for dinner every day?”

“No,” Oliver chuckled, knowing too well that that idea was a result of the unhealthy eating habits on days Felicity wasn’t home. “Daddy learned how to cook.”

“Speaking of,” Felicity said, putting her hand on Oliver’s thigh, “you still wanted to prove that to me. So how about you cook dinner?”

“Fine,” Oliver answered with a short nod of his head. “I just go get changed first.”

“Oh, can you take Tommy to his crib on the way?” Felicity asked, lifting Tommy from her legs and into her husband’s arms.

Since he was eight weeks old already, he had finally grown into Oliver’s arms. Or at least he didn’t look as lost as he had right after his birth. The contrast of Oliver’s strong arms to the boy’s tiny body was still there. Murmuring soft words into their son’s ear, Oliver carried the baby upstairs.

Felicity waited until the boys were out of sight before she pulled Emmy onto her lap and wrapped her arms around her daughter tightly, smiling when the toddler rested her head over her mother’s heart. It was something she had definitely picked up from Oliver. He loved snuggling his face to Felicity’s breast, so he could listen to the beating of her heart.

“I thought you’d be a little bit more excited,” Felicity said, looking down at her daughter who busied herself with playing with the zipper of the grey hoody her mother was wearing. “Daddy’s going to be home more often. You love when daddy’s home.”

“And you? You’ll be home, too?”

“Well, I will be here when you eat your breakfast and just like daddy does now I will go to work after that and come home before we have dinner. And I’ll be here on the weekends.”

Emmy didn’t answer. She just snuggled closer to her mother and stayed quiet for some time more. It took a while before she put her head back and looked at her mom.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“Can I ask another question, please?”

“Sure, hon.”

“Why do you want to work?”

Felicity felt her heart clench uncomfortably. One of the reasons why she had been hoping for Emmeline to be very excited about Oliver spending more time at home was that she had feared this question. As mature as Emmeline seemed from time to time, she wasn’t even three years old yet. How was she supposed to understand that the fact that Felicity loved to work with her computers and just really needed some distraction from being home almost all day didn’t mean that she was tired of being a mom or anything?

“Emmy, you know how much I love Tommy and you, right?”

Emmy nodded. “To the moon and back. At least.”

“To the moon and back at least,” Felicity agreed with a wink that made Emmeline giggle. “And you know how much mommy loves her computers, right?”

“Even daddy is not allowed to touch them. That much,” Emmeline answered with a serious nod. She shortly glanced to the door, then got up and put her lips to her mother’s ear, whispering, “Sometimes daddy touches it. But pssst!”

Felicity bit her tongue, to suppress her amused laughter as well as to stop herself from yelling for Oliver to come here and explain exactly what he had done to her tablet. Instead she said, “And because I love working with my computers so much, I miss it sometimes, you know?”

Emmeline nodded, sitting back down on her mother’s lap, now playing with the loose strands of Felicity’s hair.

“And because daddy works so much, he misses Tommy and you a lot,” Felicity continued. “So we agreed that maybe we should switch. I go working with computers and daddy’s spending time with Tommy and you.”

“I like my laptop, too,” Emmy said, glancing at the toddler’s laptop on the floor. “Can I go to the office, too?”

“Oh, sweetie, I don’t think that’s possible,” Felicity replied, caressing her daughter’s cheek. “My computers are a little bit more complicated than yours. Besides, you always help me when Tommy is crying, remember? You rub his stomach, so he stops crying. You get the hairdryer when there is nothing else that will help making him stop crying. You cover me with a blanket when I am exhausted and fall asleep on the couch. Who is going to help daddy if you’re not here?”

“Right,” Emmy said. “I’m gonna help daddy.”

“You’re gonna help me cooking?” Oliver asked when he entered the bedroom this moment. Obviously he had only heard the last words of the conversation.

“Yes,” Emmy said with a nod of her head, got up and crawled onto the armrest of the couch, so she could just jump up at Oliver and into his arms. “Mommy wants pasta, daddy. So let’s do it.”

“Let’s do it,” Oliver agreed with a nod of his head. “When mommy wants pasta, mommy gets pasta.”

Oliver was already taking the first step towards the kitchen when Emmy pulled at the fabric of his white shirt and said, “Let me down! I forgot something!”

As soon as Oliver put her back onto the couch, Emmeline turned around and climbed back onto Felicity’s lap. Framing her mother’s face with her little hands, she pressed her open mouth to Felicity’s lips, kissing her gently. Then she pulled back and said, “I love you, mommy.”

“I love you, too, Emmy,” Felicity replied.

Emmy kissed her mother once again before she ran back to the armrest and jumped into Oliver’s arms once more. Felicity watched the two of them cooking together, leaned back into the cushions and thinking about how lucky she was to have this great family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all had great holidays! <3


	87. Supermama

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As requested by some readers, a maternal moment. 
> 
> The title is a parallel to “Supersister”. With that being said, each of our four favorite Queens here will get his/her own “Super-” chapter at some point, but since it is 'Ladies first', the boys will have to wait a little. ;)
> 
> The gif was made from a youtube video...

“Come on, Tommy! Just give mommy a little smile,” Felicity pleaded with her baby boy, smiling at him encouragingly, but all Tommy did was staring at her like she was asking something insane from him. The soft skin of his forehead was wrinkled into a deep frown and his big baby blue eyes showed a lack of understanding.

Sighing, Felicity sat back down on the floor in front of where she had put Tommy on his Winnie-the-Pooh pillow after breakfast. She had sat next to him on the floor and folded the laundry, all the while talking to him and trying to make him smile his first smile. When he had fallen asleep, she had put the laundry away. And now that he was awake again, she was sitting back in front of him, talking to him like she was on Ecstasy. At least she imagined that this was what people on Ecstasy sounded like. She couldn’t say that she had any experience with that.

“Just a little smile for mommy,” Felicity tried again and tickled the underside of her little boy’s toes. Instead of giving his mother the desired smile, Tommy only kicked his feet and made a face that was hard to describe, but definitely didn’t feature a smile. “Oh, come on, Tommy! Just give mommy a little smile!”

But Tommy’s face stayed unsmiling.

“Hey, your sister already spent all day smiling at me when she was your age,” Felicity told Tommy. “Or at least she smiled at her dad when he was home since apparently mommy just wasn’t good enough to be smiled at. So this is your chance to make up for your sister. Come on, Tommy!”

Again there was no sign of a smile.

“Tommy, if your father is the first person you smile at, the two of us will have a serious problem with one another,” she told him firmly, but even the playful threat didn’t help to conjure a smile on his lips. “Tommy, even on his broodiest days I could make your father smile more easily.”

Tommy kept staring, the expression on his face changing slightly like he didn’t know what to do with that information or how to feel about his mother’s words.

“And, yes, you can take that as an offense,” Felicity added.

That was when it happened. Tommy stared at her for a split second longer. Then his face brightened up with a happy smile.

“Oh my God!” Felicity screeched, lowering her lips to her son’s head and caressing his face with lot of little kisses on his forehead, his cheeks, his chin and finally the tip of his nose. When she pulled back, he still smiled at her. “Smiling isn’t so bad, is it?”

Tommy only smiled more and wriggled his little arms and legs delightedly like he had indeed just discovered how much fun smiling was. His eyes never left Felicity’s face. The big baby blues kept observing her facial expression, almost like he was laughing about her instead of smiling at her.

When his smile disappeared slowly, Felicity put a hand on his tummy and rubbed gently and immediately a new smile formed on his lips. “So much fun to smile, right?”

Felicity looked around for her phone, so she could take a picture or make a little video to send it to Oliver and let him send it to everybody else – namely Donna and Thea – who was constantly bugging them to send more photos of their little babies. She always kept Oliver up to date with their children’s development. When Emmy had been younger, Felicity had sent Oliver hourly updates to make sure he didn’t miss anything. By now he had to live with one to two updates each day, not because the excitement about their children’s development had decreased but because with two little children there just seemed to be so little time to take photos and make videos.

And since her phone was nowhere to be seen right now and she just didn’t want to miss one second of her baby’s first smile, Oliver’s update would have to wait a little.

She looked at Tommy with a gentle smile. He had lost almost all his hair by now. The dark hair he had had when he had been born had almost completely shed. Still, with that cute face that looked actually too small for the big eyes he was the sweetest baby boy Felicity had ever seen. Today she had dressed him in the blue long sleeve onesie with the label _50% mommy – 50% daddy – 100% perfection_ and it only made him look more adorable.

“Mommy?”

At the sound of her daughter’s voice, Felicity turned around. Emmy stood in the door, holding her pink giraffe under her arm and watching her mother and her brother.

“Hey, come here, sweetie,” Felicity said, reaching out one arm for her toddler. “Tommy just smiled for the first time. I am sure he will do it again for you.”

But Emmy stayed unmoving where she was at the door, just watching her mother. Felicity ignored the low sound of discontent Tommy made and turned around to Emmy even more, so she could face her daughter completely.

“You’re okay?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

Emmy shrugged her shoulders and without saying a word she lifted her favorite stuffed animal to her face, snuggling her cheek to the pink plush with a deep sigh and hugging the giraffe tightly to her little chest. Felicity frowned worriedly. For a feisty child like Emmeline it was quite unusual to be so… calm.

“Come here,” Felicity said and leaned forward until she could get a hold of her daughter’s hips and pull Emmy closer.

When the toddler sank onto her mother’s lap, she immediately snuggled up to her, hiding her face in Felicity’s shirt and making herself small. Worriedly Felicity put her arms around her daughter as tightly as possible and lowered her head, so she could press her lips to Emmeline’s forehead.

“Your forehead is warm,” Felicity whispered against the skin of her daughter’s face. “Are you gonna get sick?”

Emmy shrugged her shoulders again instead of answering, only snuggling closer to her mother. She formed her hand to a fist in the neckline of her mother’s sweater and started whimpering slightly. Felicity pressed a kiss to Emmeline’s head and lay down with her back to the floor, cradling her daughter as close to her as possible.

Luckily, Emmy rarely ever got sick. And even if she did, she just forced herself through it most of the times, refusing to believe that she could get sick. She was just like Oliver in that matter. Only if it hit her really hard, Emmeline behaved like she was indeed sick. Obviously this time it was one of those times that the virus or whatever had caused her sickness had indeed hit her hard.

“I drew a picture,” Emmy mumbled against the side of Felicity’s neck.

“I guess it is beautiful,” Felicity whispered, rubbing her hand up and down her daughter’s back. “Do you want to show me?”

But Emmy shook her head, moving her head more into the crook of her mother’s neck, burying her face against the warm skin. Felicity could feel Emmy’s body shivering against her. She was definitely going to be sick. Felicity closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of her daughter pressed against her so close. Emmeline was a little clingy lately, probably a reaction to the news that Felicity was going to start working in a few weeks. But since cuddle time with the children were always the best, Felicity wasn’t complaining. Although she had to admit that she was slightly worried about Emmeline right now, especially since she could now feel warm tears where Emmy’s face was nestled against her neck.

Emmeline must have been feeling sick for some time already. Drawing wasn’t exactly her favorite activity because she needed to sit still for too long and she hated not moving. So she must have felt sick and tried to bite back the feeling. And now temperature had elevated and she felt terrible.

“Hey,” Felicity said gently, tightening the hold on her daughter. “Psst! It’s okay.”

But Emmy only cried more, now sobbing and whimpering against Felicity’s neck. And since he had been dissatisfied with the lack of attention anyway, Tommy just attuned to his sister’s cries. Not letting go of Emmy, Felicity sat back up and reached out her right hand for Tommy’s pacifier. As soon as he sucked the silicone nipple into his mouths, his cries stopped and he let out a deep sigh.

Yes, being a little baby was very exhausting, Felicity thought with a smile and rubbed Tommy’s tummy slightly before she put her arm back around Emmeline.

“Come on, I’ll carry you downstairs, so you can get comfortable on the couch, okay?”

But instead of answering, Emmy cried some more. Her hands gripped the fabric of Felicity’s sweater more tightly, so she could pull herself as close to Felicity as possible.

“And Tommy?” Emmy asked, her voice already sounding hoarse between two sobs.

“I’m gonna carry you downstairs and put you under the blanket and then I get Tommy downstairs, okay?”

Emmy nodded against Felicity’s neck, tightening the hold on her mother’s neck to make sure that she wasn’t going to be let down, but that hadn’t been Felicity’s intention anyway. Still holding Emmeline in her arms, she got up from the floor and carried the toddler downstairs into the living room, carefully avoiding the toys that were lying around almost everywhere.

After she had put Emmy to the couch, wrapped her tightly into a blanket and put some pillows under her head, Felicity sat down on the edge of the couch, putting her hand to Emmeline’s forehead and sighing worriedly. Was it possible that her temperature had risen even more within the last minutes?

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Felicity asked, but Emmy shook her head, whimpering once more. “Do you want mommy’s special chicken soup?”

Again she shook her head, rolling onto her side and crying more. Her little fingers reached for Felicity’s hand, pulling it in front of her face and hiding behind it. Felicity leaned down and pressed a few kisses to Emmy’s cheek, then moved her lips to her toddler’s ear, and whispered, “Do you want me to read you a story?”

Emmy nodded and Felicity almost sighed in relief. Tugging the blanket up her daughter’s body, so she was covered from chin to toes, Felicity said, “Okay, mommy’s gonna go upstairs to get Tommy and the book and then we will read that story, okay?”

Again Emmy nodded and Felicity pressed one last kiss to her daughter’s cheek, adjusting the blanket once more and then got up. Instead of heading right to the stairs, she made a short detour to the kitchen, washing her hands to not expose Tommy to the full load of germs and preparing a glass with orange juice and a pink drinking straw for Emmy. Grabbing her phone from the kitchen counter, she went upstairs, already dialing the number she had memorized long ago.

“Felicity, light of my life, fire of my loins,” Oliver said in a mixture of a sigh and a prayer when he took the call.

Felicity frowned, almost stopping to climb up the stairs, but the sounds of Emmeline sobbing on the couch and Tommy crying upstairs in his room, reminded her that she didn’t have time to stand still and wonder about her husband’s words.

“You don’t really expect me to think that you read the novel, right?”

“What novel?” Oliver asked.

Felicity rolled her eyes, but given that Tommy sounded more and more dissatisfied, she chose that this was not the right moment to tell Oliver where that phrase probably came from. Walking over to Tommy and picking him up from the floor, she asked, “Do I need to worry? Because something tells me that the choice of words could mean you have done something bad and are trying to soft-soap me.”

“No, you just got me out of the most boring meeting I have been in during my time as CEO,” Oliver explained with a chuckle. “I just have to take your calls because it could be an emergency. Is it an emergency? Please say it’s not.”

Rubbing Tommy’s back comfortingly, Felicity grabbed the first book from the shelf in Emmy’s room and headed back downstairs.

“Not really an emergency. Just your daily update on our kids – Tommy has smiled for the first time today and-”

“And I didn’t get a photo because…?” Oliver asked immediately.

“Emmy is sick.”

“And you don’t call that an emergency?”

“No, because I’ve got everything handled,” Felicity answered and put Tommy in the baby carriage, pushing it towards the living room and getting the glass with orange juice on the way there. She shortly glanced at Emmy who was already dozing and put the glass and the book on the couch table next to her. “But since there is this horrible scenario stuck in my head that Emmy could infect Tommy, I thought I’d call my lovely husband to ask if he minds coming home early.”

“Who’s the one soft-soaping now?”

“Hey, I am just trying to protect the both of us from a catastrophe here because you know the only thing that is worse than one sick child-“

“Are two sick children,” Oliver finished the sentence for her. “I have to make a few phone calls and reschedule a few appointments, but I could be there in like an hour.”

“Great. See you later.”

She hung up and put the phone to the couch table next to the book and glass of orange juice. As soon as she sat down on the edge of the couch, Emmy opened her eyes and looked at her mother tiredly. Felicity stroked her hands over her daughter’s head and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

“You gotta drink a little, sweetie,” Felicity said gently, but Emmy shook her head, rubbing her fists over her eyes. “Yes, come on, just a small sip please.”

Emmy tried to fight away Felicity’s hand with the glass, but after a little more pleading and a whispered “Do it for mommy” she finally pulled the drinking straw between her lips and drank a little. It wasn’t much, but Felicity knew that she wouldn’t drink any more right now. She would just regularly remind her daughter to drink a little. So she put the glass back onto the table and tugged the blanket higher over Emmy’s body again.

“Do you want to sleep a little?” Felicity asked.

Emmy shook her head, looking to the book on the table and saying, “Do you read me a story?”

“Sure,” Felicity answered, “I promised, didn’t I?”

Felicity lay down on the couch and pulled Emmeline close to her side, so the little girl was half lying on top of her mother with her head resting against her shoulder and one hand fisted in Felicity’s sweater.

“You’re comfortable?” Felicity asked and Emmy nodded with a long sigh. “I brought the book with story of Superdog in the zoo.”

“Superdog’s a hero. Right, mommy?” Emmy asked, her voice barely there.

“You love that, right?”

Again Emmy nodded. As often as Felicity wished her daughter hadn’t inherited her talent for talking and talking without ever taking a break or even a breath for that matter, she missed the little girl’s voice already. And listening to how weak she sounded, when she finally talked, didn’t really make her feel any better.

“You know, Laurel asked me a few days back if you like to go to the zoo with her someday soon,” Felicity said, taking the book from the table. “Would you like that?”

“Can _we_ go to the zoo?” Emmy asked quietly, her hand sneaking from Felicity’s sweater to her neck, putting it flush against the skin, feeling her mother’s pulse under the palm of her hand. “You and me?”

“The two of us?” Felicity asked with a smile. “What do we do about Tommy?”

“Tommy, too.”

“And daddy?”

“Daddy, too.”

Felicity chuckled. “A family trip to the zoo? Sure, when you’re fit again, we’ll do this.”

“Tommy, daddy, you and me?”

“Tommy daddy, you and me,” Felicity confirmed with a nod of her head. “Ready for your story now?”

 

 

When Oliver came home exactly fifty-four minutes after he finished his call with Felicity, he found his wife on the couch, reading their sleeping daughter, who was lying on her mother’s chest, a story and pushing Tommy’s baby carriage back and forth with her foot.

“Wow, you really meant it when you said you’ve got it handled,” Oliver said.

“You doubted that?”

“I wouldn’t dare to doubt anything you say,” Oliver said with a wink, but then got serious. His eyes drifted from his wife’s face to their daughter’s. “Emmy okay?”

“She’s going to be,” Felicity replied, rubbing her hand over the toddler’s back. “She just needs some rest. And chicken soup probably wouldn’t hurt, either. Could you cook it? Recipe is in the red book in the wall cupboard over the sink.”

Oliver perked his eyebrow. “I am allowed to touch your cookbook?”

Felicity chuckled. “The spaghettis last week were very convincing. From now on you’ve got full access to the kitchen. You can bake, you can cook, you can do whatever you want to do.”

Oliver perked his eyebrow a little more, the corners of his lips lifting into a smirk.

“Children present!” Felicity hissed before he got the chance to say anything. “They are sleeping, but they are present. Now be a nice husband, take Tommy to the kitchen and cook the soup for Emmy. You might need to head to the super-”

“Mommy, don’t stop reading,” Emmy said sleepily since she was barely awake, pulling at the sweater to make sure she had her mother’s attention.

Oliver made an empathic face at the sound of his daughter’s weak voice and Felicity smiled at him comfortingly, snuggling her cheek to the crown of her daughter’s head. Holding the book a little higher, she tried to find where she had stopped.

“I’ll take Tommy with me and we’ll leave the two of you and go to the kitchen. Call me if you need anything.”

“I got it handled,” Felicity whispered and sighed in relief when she had finally found where she had stopped reading before.

Oliver was almost out of the door and the first syllable was already on the tip of Felicity’s tongue when Emmy mumbled against her mother’s neck, “Supermama.”

Felicity frowned and was already about to ask her toddler what she had said because she clearly must have understood that wrong, when Emmy added in the same mumbling voice, “Supermama is a hero, too.”

Felicity had trouble not to burst out in tears because what greater compliment was there? Hearing her daughter saying something like that, it touched her even more than she would have expected. Considering how obsessed Emmy was with all the masked heroes in Starling and Central City, those words probably meant a lot more from her than from other kids her age. Felicity had a horror of letting her daughter watch the news since it was news about murder and rape and whatever after all, but whenever there was a picture of one of the heroes in the newspaper, Felicity had to cut it out, so Emmy could add it to her collection of hero-related things.

Emmy knew very well – or as well as a child her age could understand – what a hero was and in her mind her mommy lived up to those expectations.

“Thank you, Emmeline,” Felicity whispered into her sleeping daughter’s ear and pressed a kiss to the back of her head.

Just when she was about to start reading again, her eyes met Oliver’s. He had turned around and leaned in the door now, his one arm reaching behind him to push the baby carriage back and forth. He looked at his wife and his daughter with a reverent smile on his lips, mouthing, “She’s right.”

Felicity mouthed back a ‘Thank you’ and was just about to say something more, when she felt Emmeline squirming on top of her, so she hastily gave Oliver a look and while he nodded and left like he had been about to do minutes ago anyway, Felicity got back to reading.

And although her own voice was actually the only thing that could be heard in the room, Felicity could still hear her daughter’s words over and over again in her ear.

_Supermama. Supermama is a hero, too._


	88. Please don't leave me

He was going to leave her.

She had been trying to avoid the thought. She had been trying to find a way to circumvent the inevitable, but after going through every possible scenario for their current situation for the last two hours, Felicity knew there was no way to prevent it. Oliver was going to leave her.

Playing with the rings on her left hand, she looked around in the dark room, trying to find something to distract her from her thoughts. But of course it was useless. Ever since the thought had popped up in her mind, Felicity wasn’t able to get it out again. She had barely been able to put the kids to sleep without bursting into tears. And when they had finally fallen asleep, she hadn’t found the courage to go into her bedroom and crawl into bed. So instead she had come down here to sit in the dark and try clearing her thoughts.

Her thoughts were cleared now. There was no doubt left.  
Oliver was going to leave her.

Felicity took a deep breath, leaned back in the chair and downed the rest of her grape juice with one gulp. She missed drinking her favorite wine, just a little glass of Lafite Rothschild to let the evening fade away comfortably. Usually it didn’t bother her too much that first the pregnancy and now breastfeeding were keeping her from wine, but today it did bother her a little bit. She could really use a glass of wine. But since she hadn’t expressed any of her breast milk because Oliver was sick and couldn’t get up in the night to feed Tommy like he usually did anyway, she would definitely not drink any wine tonight. She probably wouldn’t do so even if she had prepared bottles at hand, but now she didn’t even have the choice to do so.  
Her mommy senses stopped her.

Wine would probably not help her to accept the thought that Oliver was going to leave her, anyway. But at least the thought of wine had distracted her for like full five seconds. Nervously Felicity tapped the fingers of her right hand on the tabletop, resting her chin on the palm of her left hand in the meantime. Staring into the darkness distantly, she tried to imagine what her life would be like from now on.

Oliver wasn’t going to leave her immediately. That she knew for sure because Oliver was a great husband and just a wonderful person in general and he wouldn’t just leave her without trying to save their marriage. Being the good guy he was, he would instead agree to what she wanted and deny himself his own wishes because he loved her so much and didn’t want to give up on their family or make her do something she didn’t truly want to do. So he would say that it was fine and he would try to hold them together despite being denied what he wanted. And for a few years everything would be great like nothing was bothering him, but the more time would pass, the more Oliver would realize what he had given up for her, what she had made him give up. And slowly he would start to resent her for that until that resentment would turn into hate and their marriage would fall apart.

They would get divorced and the kids would spend one week with her and one week with Oliver or something. They would need to find a way to deal with each other for the sake of Emmy and Tommy. Their children shouldn’t suffer because their parents were getting divorced. It was probably the most difficult thing in this whole situation – trying to find a solution for their kids and to continue being good parents even when they didn’t get along with each other anymore.

But they would find a way because Felicity was not going to let their children grow up without their father. She knew how it felt to grow up without a father and although she knew that the situation had been different for her, because her father hadn’t been a good man like Oliver was, she was still sure she knew how badly it would hurt her children.

It had hurt when her father had left her.  
And it would hurt when Oliver was going to leave her.

She should be used to the pain by now.  
She was always being left.  
Always. Always. Al-

“Felicity?”

Gasping for breath in slight panic, Felicity moved up her head at the sound of her name coming from so close behind her. The movement caused the back of her head to bump against something hard and the groan that came from Oliver and accompanied her own groan of pain told her that it was probably Oliver’s jaw her head had bumped against. Turning around to him, she put her hand to the hurting spot on her head and massaged it gently, trying to soothe the pain.

“I had hoped three coughs and two sneezers would be enough to announce my presence to you,” Oliver grumbled, massaging his jaw like she massaged the back of her head. “Obviously I have been wrong and you have been in your not-aware-mode. Am I bleeding?”

“Why didn’t you just switch on the light?” Felicity asked, ignoring Oliver’s question since the sound of his voice told her that he was joking anyway.

“I thought you had fallen asleep,” Oliver said, lowering his hand after a glance at his watch. Cocking his head, he frowned at her. “It’s two a.m., Felicity. Why are you not in bed?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

Oliver’s frown deepened. He shortly turned around to switch on the light, almost blinding Felicity with it, and then with a sigh he sat down on the chair next to her, folding his naked forearms on the tabletop in front of him. He observed her for a few seconds before he stated, “You’re not even wearing your pajamas. You haven’t been in bed at all yet.”

“Like I said, I couldn’t sleep,” Felicity only repeated and gestured around her head. “There are too many things going on here. What about you?”

“I am sick and needed cuddles, but you weren’t there,” Oliver replied.

Felicity snorted. “Oliver, I told you that you shouldn’t kiss Emmy when she is sick. You don’t get babied for not listening.”

“I don’t want to be babied for not listening. I want to be babied for being sick. Emmy got cuddles all day when she was sick.”

“Emmy is a toddler.”

“Damn it!” Oliver hissed playfully. “And there I thought I had found a method to get daylong cuddles.”

Felicity smiled. Or at least she tried to smile, but all she could manage was a slight twitch of the right corner of her mouth. And even that didn’t seem to reach her eyes because Oliver moved her chair, so they were sitting face to face right in front of each other. He gently stroked his hands down the outside of her thighs over her purple dress, resting them on her naked knees.

“What’s going on? You’ve been closed off since Thea left earlier today… or yesterday actually since we already passed midnight. Did you two fight? Before you answer, let me remind you that I am your husband and legally obligated to take your side, no matter what,” he hastily added and winked at her, but again all Felicity managed was a twitch of the corner of her lips and again it made Oliver only look more worried. “Hey, tell me what’s going on please.“

Felicity hesitated shortly. She really didn’t want to talk about this right now. She knew that they had to talk about it rather sooner than later, but just not tonight. But Oliver’s eyes were, although glazed from his cold, intense. Felicity knew that she wasn’t getting away with an excuse tonight.

“You told Thea that she could be the godmother of our next baby again,” Felicity stated and looked at his face closely.

“Well, she was complaining about not being godmother to all of our children,” Oliver explained. “And it was a little bit annoying, so I told her the next will be her godchild again, but it will take a few years before we’re having another baby anyway, so I guess she will forget I promised her that and even if she doesn’t, we find some other good reason for why she cannot be the baby’s godmother. If you want to pick someone else, we can-“

“Oliver, it’s not about the godparent,” Felicity interrupted him and immediately Oliver shut up and only looked at her patiently. So Felicity took a deep breath. “I don’t want another baby.”

There it was. The words were out there. One of the thousand scenarios she had played through in her head those last hours had been initiated. And one day soon she was going to find out which of those scenarios it was – maybe the one where he left her shortly after Tommy’s sixth birthday. That one had hurt the most probably although of course they had all hurt badly.

“Okay,” Oliver said slowly, “that solves the whole godparent problem, I guess.”

A single tear rolled down Felicity’s cheek and she took in a deep breath. But before she got to say anything, Oliver already reached out his hand and wiped the tear away gently and stroked over the skin of her cheek lovingly.

“Hey, there’s no reason to cry. We don’t have to decide that right now,” he explained. “Tommy is only ten weeks old. He is very exhausting right now. Our energy is almost exhausted. There is no reason to even think about another baby in the next eighteen months and-“

“Oliver, we have to decide this now because I can tell that I am not going to change my mind about it. After the depression and all the stress it caused between us and then that catastrophic birth during that Tommy and I almost died I don’t want to ever be pregnant again,” she explained, another tear rolling down her cheek. “I don’t want to go through that again and I don’t want _us_ to go through that again, so I don’t want another baby and I know that you do because you built us a house with four nurseries and we only have two children to fill them, so I guess we should better talk about this now because the longer we will delay this conversation, the worse it will get and since I know for sure that you are going to leave me to find someone else to have this army of babies with and-“

Her ramble came to a sudden stop when Oliver’s lips crashed against hers and he used the fact that her lips were still opened from her babbling to move his tongue into her mouth, stroking it against hers. The kiss was gentle, yet hungry and there was a promise in it, Felicity wasn’t sure Oliver could keep. Yet, she responded to the kiss, her hands framing his face as soon as his own hands lowered from her face over her neck, shoulders and arms, down to her hips. And with a strong grip on her, he pulled her from her own chair towards him and made her sit down in his lap, keeping her close to his naked chest and not once breaking the kiss. He took the glasses off her nose and put them to the table.

His lungs were burning with the need for air and the need to cough badly, but he kept kissing her to reassure her that he was here now and hopefully make sure that she knew that he didn’t plan on leaving her. Only when Felicity sobbed against his lips, he pulled back slightly and immediately her head fell to his shoulder and she buried her face against his neck, wrapping her arms around his chest and crying.

Oliver didn’t say anything. He just let her cry, but all the while he held onto her, rubbed her back and whispered words of comfort into her ear. His hoarse whisper was only interrupted when he pressed soft kisses to her hair.

Quietly – and with worry – he wondered where this came from.

Whenever they had talked about having children in general, they hadn’t exactly determined a number. He had made jokes about wanting at least seven children when Felicity had said she didn’t want any more children when Emmy had been only a few weeks old and very troublesome, but they had both known that it hadn’t been serious. And when he had built the house, he had just picked a number of rooms they could use, whether as nurseries or something else. He had said they were nurseries to tease her about having four babies, but they were using the two free rooms as a spare room and an extra playroom for the kids now, so Felicity must have known that he wasn’t exactly urging them to have four kids. If he had ever noticed that she felt uncomfortable about his teasing, he would have stopped teasing her and reassured her of his unconditional love immediately.

He didn’t mind having more kids – one day far in the future when Tommy would be a little older and they could remember why it was great to have kids because that little boy and all the hours he spent crying, especially during nights, weren’t exactly making it to remember that although Oliver had to admit that most of the time one look into those big, blue eyes were enough to make him forget the hours of sleeplessness– but if Felicity didn’t want any more children, he’d be okay with that, too. Felicity knew that. Maybe she didn’t know-know, but they had the kind of connection where they knew such things.

She couldn’t honestly believe that she was his human baby machine and he was only staying with her if she was having a dozen pretty babies with him. She didn’t believe that. Oliver was certain that she didn’t believe that because they didn’t have the kind of marriage where they felt like the other was only staying around for practical reasons. This wasn’t about this.

When Felicity’s sobs slowly became quieter, Oliver pressed a kiss to her ear and then whispered, “You know I love you, right?”

Oliver felt a first relief when Felicity nodded against the side of his neck, her face still hidden against his skin. “And you know that you’re not going to get rid of me anytime soon, right? Even if we have different opinions. Right?”

“But-“ Felicity started to object, but Oliver hastily cut her off.

“Felicity, we have two perfectly healthy children, a girl and a boy. What else would we want?” he asked gently, wiping some tears away from her face. “And you know that I am in this marriage for us and not only because of the children.”

“But-“

“No more buts, Felicity,” Oliver said gently. “You know all those things. I know that you know those things. So what’s really going on here? Are you going to get sick?”

When Emmy was getting sick, she was often getting clingy and started crying. And Emmy was a lot like Felicity, so maybe that was why Felicity was like this tonight. Felicity was barely ever sick, but if Emmy had infected him, Felicity could have been infected, too. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, checking for her temperature, but her skin wasn’t too warm.

“Come on, what’s going on?” Oliver whispered, rather encouraging than urging her.

“My dad left all those years ago today,” Felicity whispered back, another sob escaping her lips and she pressed herself closer against him.

Oliver squeezed his eyes shut. He knew that her dad had left. He knew that because he knew almost everything about her and he definitely knew everything about her that had had such a strong influence on her life like her father leaving had had on her.  
He just hadn’t known that this was the day he had left.

So he held her more tightly and pressed kisses to every part of her skin he could reach with his lips. Felicity only sighed and closed her eyes, but a small smile was playing on her lips and Oliver felt even more relieved. She was going to be okay.

Leaning his lips against her ear, he whispered, “Your dad’s a jerk.”

She huffed a laugh against his neck and Oliver smiled. Getting up from the chair, he carried her upstairs while she was whispering against his shoulder, “Usually I can deal with it. It’s so long ago and I know that my dad is a jerk, but this day… Well, normally I can even deal with this day, but then Thea mentioned the thing about the baby and the thought that we could disagree on something important like the number of babies… It… messed me up. I’m sorry.”

Her hands roamed over the muscles of his back when they stepped into their dark bedroom. Oliver put her down onto the mattress and framed her face with his hands. He brushed his lips against hers shortly before he whispered, “There’s no need to apologize. You’ve been taking care of me for the last years and as little as I want to see you suffering, I am glad when I can give you something back from time to time. And in case it wasn’t clear before, you are not going to lose me.”

He brushed his lips against hers once again, but hastily pulled back when he needed to sneeze.

“I’m clearly going to be sick, too,” Felicity grumbled. “Thank you, hon.”

Oliver only chuckled and crawled under the blanket, pulling Felicity close against his chest. She didn’t stop him, so she didn’t seem to mind sleeping in her dress tonight. He cradled her against him, resting his forehead against hers and nuzzling her nose with his. He enjoyed the giggle it earned him.

“Since you’re going to be sick anyway, at least we can cuddle all night,” Oliver whispered against her lips and kissed her gently. Felicity slid closer to him under the blanket and wrapped her arm around his waist. The tips of her fingers brushed over the scarred skin of his lower back, her favorite scar on his body.

They lay like that for a while. The silence was only interrupted by Oliver’s heavy breathing and low coughing. Felicity rubbed the hand that wasn’t distracted, newly discovering the scar on his lower back, over his chest.

“Maybe you should work from home the next days. You’re sick. Sick people shouldn’t go to the office.”

“Sick dads shouldn’t be home or they infect their babies.”

“True,” Felicity sighed, brushing her lips against his. “You should better be fit again when I get sick.”

“I’ll give my best,” Oliver chuckled and sighed.

Again they lay there without talking, enjoying the silence.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked after a while.

“Hm?”

“You said that you don’t want to be pregnant again because you’re scared of being depressed once more and you don’t want us to live through that again,” Oliver whispered. “Can I tell you how I see it without making you think that I am trying to talk you into something you don’t want?”

Felicity only hesitated for the split of the second before she nodded. “Sure.”

“The beginning of the pregnancy and later the birth were both hard on us, on us as individuals as well as on us as a couple. But I think we have grown a lot with that and I would like the chance to prove to both of us that we can get through something like a depression together. And I don’t want the depression and the catastrophic circumstances of Tommy’s birth to be the things we remember about creating our family in fifty years. On the other hand,” he said with a sigh.

“Shouldn’t the other hand be my part?” Felicity asked quietly.

“Not necessarily,” Oliver chuckled, brushing his lips against hers, “because believe it or not I have doubts about having more babies, too.”

“Really?” Felicity asked.

“Really,” he confirmed. “Because a depression is no fun to go through and no matter how much I can support and help you, it is your health that is at risk and… let’s be honest, our lives are crazy. We have been through two crazy births and… I don’t know. Maybe we shouldn’t challenge our fate anymore. I love babies, especially our babies, but two healthy kids is already more than a lot couples get, so I am a lucky man as it is already.”

Felicity stayed quiet, not saying a word. Oliver gave her time, waiting if she wanted to say something and then said, “Like I said, we don’t have to decide this anytime soon. We have time.”

“I just don’t know if I can go through that again or want to put you through this again,” Felicity whispered.

“We’ll figure this out,” Oliver promised, “but not tonight. You should sleep because Tommy is going to wake up in like one hour, demanding to be fed.”

Felicity groaned. “How could we forget how exhausting it is to have a little baby?”

Oliver only chuckled, not caring to answer since Felicity’s breathing already evened out against his skin. Smiling, he closed his eyes and whispered, “Sleep tight, baby.”

 

_“Oliver, this is a nightmare.”_

_“It’s not.”_

_“It is.”_

_“Okay, it is a little bit surprising and it will be some trouble maybe, but this is no nightmare. It is a miracle.”_

_“Three babies. Not one, not two. Three! We’re going to have three more babies!”_

_“Yeah, I got that when the doctor told us that we’re having triplets.”_

_“It’s a nightmare. It has to be a nightmare. A terrible nightmare and-“_

_“Felicity, could you please sit down because your constant walking up and down is making me nervous.”_

_“I mean… we need a new car.”_

_“We have money. We can afford a new car.”_

_“And we only have four nurseries and five children. We don’t even have enough rooms for them! We need to put two of them together in one room which they think is fun as long as they are young, but when they invite their girlfriends over and-“_

_“Thank God, you already precluded that they would invite boyfriends when they’re girls!”_

_“Oh my God! Oliver, what if they are girls? Three girls? How would we pick a name? We barely found one, how will we find three?”_

_“We could just give them serial numbers. Baby one, baby two and baby three.”_

_“If you’re trying to be funny, I have to disappoint you. You’re not funny.”_

_“I am hilarious!”_

_“And if we give our babies numbers, it would be three, four and five because we already have two children.”_

_“Yeah, but Emmy and Tommy have names. We cannot start with baby three. Everyone would ask what happened to baby one and baby two.”_

_“See?! We cannot even agree on which numbers we give our babies. It’s a nightmare.”_

_“We just hope for boys and it won’t be as bad.”_

_“It will still be five children, Oliver!”_

_“I know that.”_

_“We don’t even have enough hands for five children. Let’s just picture we are walking on a sidewalk, right next to a busy street. We have five children, but only four hands. I guess sooner or later we will have to decide which of our children we love least and can risk getting hit by a car and-“_

_“Now you are exaggerating a little.”_

_“I don’t think so.”_

_“I think so for the two of us.”_

_“Well, little children need to be held at their hands when walking next to a busy street. If we have only four hands, but five children, one child cannot be held at its hand. So there is the risk that this child is running on the street and getting hit by a car.”_

_“You’re crazy.”_

_“I am not crazy. This is a serious thing that we need to consider and-“_

_“When the triplets are old enough to walk, Emmy will be old enough to walk beside a street without being held at her hand and now come here.”_

_“…”_

_“We’re gonna make this.”_

_“How?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“That is not helping. … Neither is your laugh … and kissing my neck is what took us here in the first place.”_

_“It’s a good place.”_

_“Five children, Oliver.”_

_“We survive Slade and Ra’s and a bunch of other villains, so how bad can triplets be?”_

_“…”_

_“Okay, it’s gonna be hard, but… We’re gonna make this.”_

_“We’re gonna make this.”_

_“A little more enthusiasm could help.”_

_“…”_

_“Okay, enthusiasm comes later. Does it help if I take my shirt off?”_

_“How can you be so unconcerned? Three babies are a lot of work, Oliver.”_

_“Well, nothing worthwhile ever comes easy. And if we don’t get through having triplets, then how do others do it? Our marriage is probably one of the most challenged relationships there is. Having triplets? It’s a clinch for us.”_

_“…”_

_“Okay, maybe not a clinch, but…”_

_“We’re gonna make this, right?”_

_“Right.”_

_“…”_

_“Shall I take my shirt off now?”_

_“Yeah, I am done freaking out for now. Let the other hormones take over.”_

_“I like those hormones. Do you think there will be three times as much of those hormones?”_

_“Oliver, if there are three times as much of those hormones, I need a second lover because you won’t be able to satisfy my needs alone any longer.”_

_“Oh, let me show you how I can satisfy your needs.”_

 

When Felicity opened her eyes, the first thing she noticed were that her hands were roaming quite low over Oliver’s stomach and she hastily pulled them away like she had been burnt by his skin. The next thing she noticed was that Oliver lay on his side with his head propped up onto his hand and he was watching her with an amused expression in his face.

“Feeling better?”

“Hmhmm,” she hummed in affirmation.

“What were you doing there before?” he asked, gesturing towards his stomach where her hands had been before.

“Dreaming?” she asked and Oliver’s grin told her that she was definitely blushing.

“I think I’d like to hear more about that dream,” Oliver stated, rolling on top of her and nudging her legs apart with his knees, so he could settle in between them. “You looked very… affected.”

While Oliver lowered his lips to her neck and started sucking at her pulse point, Felicity stroked her hands up and down his back, scratching his scars with the nails of her fingers. She pressed a short kiss to his temple and played with the short hair at the back of his neck before she whispered into his ear, “I was pregnant with triplets.”

Immediately Oliver’s head snapped up. “Triplets?”

“Three little babies,” Felicity confirmed.

“That’s a lot of babies.”

Felicity watched Oliver’s face closely and as soon as she saw the slightest changing in his facial expression, she said, “Don’t even start looking at me like that, Oliver. We’re not having triplets. Ever.”

“Well, it would be cute. Three little babies.”

“Not ever,” Felicity repeated with a chuckle and sighed. “But maybe… in a few years… we could have a third baby.”

“What if we’re having triplets then?”

“Then I’ll kill you.”

“You would have to take care of the triplets on your own if you do so.”

“Right,” Felicity said with a nod of her head and perked he lips. “Lucky you, I’m not going to kill you.”

“Besides, we both know that your hormones are taking over your body from time to time when you’re pregnant. You need someone to satisfy your needs when that happens.”

“I could need someone to satisfy my needs right now,” Felicity stated with a mischievous grin. “And since we already kissed, there is no need to hold back anymore. I get sick anyway.”

“Hm… Who am I to deny you satisfaction of your needs?” Oliver asked with a smirk and lowered his lips to the side of her neck, once again sucking his pulse point. He slowly rubbed himself against her and Felicity wrapped her legs around his legs, moving against him.

Just when Felicity was about to lower Oliver’s sweatpants, so she could touch his already hard cock, Tommy started crying. Sighing, Oliver dropped his weight on top of Felicity, burying his head in the pillow next to her neck. His hips came to a stop and he released a frustrated groan.

“Tommy has crappy timing.”

“He does,” Felicity replied with a sigh, stroking her hands up and down his neck one last time. “Okay, I’ll go feed him and then we come back to that.”

“I’ll be waiting,” Oliver answered, rolling them around, so she could press one last kiss to his lips and head to the door.

Standing there, she turned around to him. “Oliver?”

“Hm?” Oliver made, crossing his arms behind his head relaxed and turning his face towards her.

“I meant what I said,” she stated with a smile, leaning against the doorframe. “Tommy is clearly too young right now, but maybe in a few years we could consider having another baby.”

Oliver smiled. “We don’t have to decide that right now.”

“No, we don’t,” Felicity agreed. “But at least I know now that this topic is not off the table yet.”

Oliver’s smile widened. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied and considered walking back to the bed and kissing him, but Tommy’s cries grew louder as his impatience and hunger increased. “Okay, that topic might get off the table sooner than we both thought because I feel like Tommy will suck out our last energy and eliminate all thoughts of ever having a baby again from our minds.”

Oliver chuckled. “I’ll wait here until you come back, so we can at least practice making a baby, so in case we will decide for a third one after all, we still know how to do it when the time comes.”

Felicity opened her mouth to reply, but again Tommy’s cries increased in volume, so she rolled her eyes and left the room.

Oliver waited until she had disappeared before he grabbed his phone and marked this day in his calendar. Next year he would be prepared for this day and he would know exactly what was going on if Felicity was a little out of herself. So he would plan out a full day for the four of them, maybe an evening that was only for Felicity and him afterwards, and he would reassure her that he was not going to leave. Ever.

 She had experience abandonment in her life, but _he_ would never abandon her.  
Never.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I admit that this chapter might have been a little messy.


	89. Like mommy and daddy do

“Mommy?”

Felicity groaned tiredly and buried her face into the pillow, tugging at the blanket to pull it over her head and get back to sleep. But just when she had found a comfortable position that would still allow her to breathe, the blanket over her was moved and when Felicity turned her head, she found her daughter lying right next to her. The toddler reached out and put one of her tiny hands to her mother’s cheek, stroking it gently.

“Hi, baby,” Felicity said in a mixture of a murmur and a sigh.

“Hi, mommy,” Emmy replied. “Are you still tired?”

“Hm-hmm,” Felicity confirmed with a hum.

“And are you still sick?”

“A little,” Felicity said, this time more in a sigh than a murmur.

Emmy slid a little closer on the mattress and kissed her mother’s lips gently. When she pulled back and rested her head back next to her mother’s on the pillow, she asked, “Are you feeling better now?”

“Much better,” Felicity assured with a smile. “Thank you.”

Felicity reached out a hand to wrap an arm around her daughter and pull her close for some cuddling, but before she could do so, Emmy crawled out from under the blanket and due to the moving of the mattress Felicity assumed that her daughter had slid off the bed. But then the mattress dipped again, the blanket was lifted and Emmy stuck her head under it.

“Stay here, mommy. Don’t move,” she said excitedly and the next second she was gone again.

Frowning, Felicity listened to Emmy’s hurried steps on the wood floor. She could hear her toddler running around the bed to the door, opening it and stopping right behind it with the door ajar.

“Mommy’s feeling better,” Emmy whispered so loudly that Felicity had no trouble to hear even though the blanket was still pulled over her head. “Are we going to show her now?”

“I don’t know. What if mommy fell asleep again already?” Oliver asked back, his voice muffled to a whisper, but just like Emmeline’s Felicity could hear it.

She could also hear her daughter gasping for breath and saying, “Stay here, daddy.”

Again steps could be heard when Emmy ran back to the bed, again the mattress dipped, again the blanket was lifted and Emmy stuck her head under it.

“Mommy?”

“Yes?”

“Don’t fall asleep again.”

“Okay.”

“Promise?”

“Sure.”

Emmy disappeared. The mattress moved. Steps could be heard.

“Mommy’s awake.”

“You’re sure?”

“She promised me.”

“Okay,” Oliver said seriously. “How do we get mommy to your room?”

“Can’t she walk?”

“What if she is too tired?”

Hasty steps. The mattress dipped. The blanket was lifted. Emmy’s head appeared.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“I have a surprise for you. Can you go to my room?”

Felicity sighed playfully. “I don’t know, honey. It’s a long way…”

“Should daddy carry you?”

“That could work. But I don’t know if daddy agrees to that.”

“Okay. Wait here and don’t fall asleep, mommy.”

Emmy’s face disappeared. She crawled off the mattress. Hasty steps.

“Daddy?”

“Did you ask mommy?”

“She can’t walk so far. Can you carry her?”

“Hm… I don’t know… It’s a lot of work… Ask mommy what I get from her if I carry her.”

 Hasty steps. The mattress dipped. The blanket was lifted. Emmy’s face appeared right after Felicity got her face back under control and hid the giant smile on her lips.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“What does daddy get if he carries you?”

“Hm…” Felicity made, narrowing her eyes a little like she really had to think about this. “How about one of mommy’s special kisses?”

“I ask daddy,” Emmy said. “Don’t fall asleep, mommy.”

Emmy’s face disappeared. She crawled off the mattress. Hasty steps.

“Daddy, mommy says she gives you her special kiss.”

Oliver snorted. “Tell mommy she can keep the germs to herself. I don’t want her kisses until she hasn’t sneezed for two full days.”

“Hey!” Felicity yelled indignantly and kicked back the blanket. “You’re the one who gave me the germs!”

“Oh-oh! I think mommy heard us,” Oliver said.

When the door opened more, Emmy came running back in, but instead of running around the bed to the free side of the mattress, she climbed right on her mother’s leg and crawled forward until she lay on her mother’s chest.

“I kiss you, mommy,” she said, leaning over Felicity’s face and kissing her a few times. “You feel better?”

“So much better,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “Thank you, honey.”

She shot a glance to Oliver who leaned in the doorframe, his arms crossed in front of his chest, while he was looking at her with a smug smile on his lips.

“Where’s Tommy?”

“He takes care of the surprise,” Emmy answered excitedly and climbed back off the bed. “Can we show you?”

“Sure,” Felicity answered, sitting up on the mattress. When Oliver stepped closer, reaching out his arms to lift Felicity off the bed, she turned her head away with a playful snort. “Puh! You know, if you prefer that I keep my germs to myself, you probably shouldn’t carry me.”

Oliver murmured something to himself that sounded dangerously close to an imitation of her voice, but before she could complain about it, he had her already lifted into his arms and explained, “Since we’re married and half of everything you own is mine anyway, I guess you’ll have to share your germs with me whether I like it or not. Have of your germs are mine, too.”

“Well, if that isn’t the most romantic description of marriage ever,” Felicity grinned widely, sliding her arms around her husband’s neck and kissing him gently.

“Daddy, come on! We show mommy our secret!” Emmy suggested excitedly as soon as her parents’ lips parted.

“Lead the way, sweetie,” Oliver asked.

Immediately Emmy turned around and ran towards her room. Oliver and Felicity followed. Felicity was excited to see what Oliver and the kids had planned out to surprise her. When she had lain down for her nap, she had heard them moving furniture and had wondered whether they were planning on building a parkour. But she doubted that they were going to surprise her with that.

The moment Oliver stepped into the room, Felicity still in his arms, Emmy yelled, “Surprise!”

She was sitting on the floor right next to her brother who smiled and wiggled his arms and legs happily. Right behind her there was a pillow fort that to Felicity’s surprise looked much more stable than the pillow forts she remembered from her childhood.

“Wow!” Felicity made. “It’s beautiful.”

“Come, climb in, mommy!” Emmy suggested, reaching out her hand for her mother to take.

Oliver let Felicity down to the floor and she sank to her knees and took her daughter’s hand to let the toddler lead her into the pillow fort. It was even more amazing from the inside. Every corner was cushioned with pillows, blankets and mattresses. Oliver must have carried every mattress from the guestrooms here to create this beauty. Their fairy lights took care that it wasn’t too dark in there. A small pile of books assured that nobody was going to get bored and-

“What’s that?” Felicity asked Oliver when he came climbing in behind them on his knees and one hand, balancing Tommy on his other arm.

Oliver didn’t even follow the direction of her hand. He just answered, “Sweets so nobody gets hungry.”

“Oliver, that are-“

“Too many sweets,” he finished her sentence for her. Putting Tommy down on the mattress, he crawled over to where Felicity rested against the cushions comfortably. He pressed a short kiss to her lips, moved his lips from hers over her cheek to her ear and whispered, “A few more weeks and you’ll be the working parent who gets to spoil the kids.”

“Then we’ll have two parents who spoil the children,” Felicity whispered back.

“No, I’ll be the responsible one then,” Oliver promised and pulled back slightly. When he saw the doubting expression in his wife’s face, he grinned guiltily. “Yeah, I guess they’ll have two parents who spoil them then.”

Chuckling at how she rolled her eyes, he pecked her lips once, twice, three and was just about to brush his lips against hers once more and deepen the kiss when Emmy let herself fall into the cushions right next to her parents and said, “I want to cuddle with Tommy.”

“Sure, sweetie,” Oliver said.

Shortly brushing his lips against Felicity’s one last time, he sat back on his heels and lifted Tommy from the mattress to put him onto his daughter’s legs.

“No, like you cuddle mommy,” Emmy protested.

Oliver grinned and pulled at Emmy’s legs to bring her in a more lying than sitting position. Then he put Tommy how he know Emmy wanted to have him lying on top of her and crawled back to Felicity and with closed eyes lowered his head to her chest, resting his ear right above her heart. Her heartbeat was as even and beautiful as a heartbeat could be. He loved the sound. It was one of his favorite sounds in the entire world. Sighing, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed a kiss to her heart through her clothes while Felicity wrapped her arms around his shoulders and played with the short hair at the nape of his neck.

He opened his eyes, watching Emmy and a now sleeping Tommy mimicking their parents’ postures. Tommy’s head rested on Emmy’s chest, her little arms were wrapped around her brother’s little body and she always pressed little kisses to the crown of the baby’s head at the same time Oliver felt Felicity’s lips on his head.

And it was just perfect. Having the most important people in his life here like this was just perfect. He sighed contently and closed his eyes again, snuggling his face more firmly against Felicity’s chest.

“Are you going to fall asleep?” Felicity whispered into his short hair, hugging him more tightly to her.

“Hm-hmm,” Oliver hummed conferment and took in a deep breath, enjoying the scent of her skin. “Emmy said she wanted to cuddle with Tommy just like I cuddle you. Tommy’s sleeping and since we cannot wake him, I have to be asleep, too.”

Felicity chuckled quietly. “Can’t mess with that logic.”

Oliver was almost completely asleep when he heard Emmy whisper, “See, Tommy? Just like mommy and daddy do.”

And right before Oliver fell asleep, a happy smile formed on his lips.


	90. The boy you were and the man you are

“Awww, look at how tired you are,” Felicity said in a quiet singsong when Tommy yawned and she smiled at her son. While lately his reaction to her smile had been an excited movement of his arms and legs to show his delight he only looked at her with his big blue eyes now. “What? You’re so tired you can’t even give mommy a smile?”

She did up the last button of Tommy’s pajama and put her hand on his little tummy to tickle him slightly. He only smiled shortly, but he did smile back at her, kicked his little feet and moved his arms excitedly. It only lasted for a short moment before he yawned again.

“That was an exciting day, wasn’t it?” she asked while she was starting to dress him into the baby sleeping bag. “Being christened clearly was an important day. Now Barry and Lyla are officially your godparents. And then you saw all of our good friends again. Everyone was there and played with you and talked to you and cuddled you,... All of that tired you out, hm?”

Like he was trying to answer her question, he yawned again. Maybe he would fall asleep easily tonight although usually getting him to sleep alone in his bed was a nightmare because he just refused to sleep, no matter how tired was. Tommy just hated sleeping and he hated being alone and god knew the little boy hated sleeping alone.

She lifted Tommy from the changing table into her arms, intending to carry him around in the nursery. But just when she turned towards the door to walk into that direction, she saw John stepping into the doorframe.

“Hi,” she said, shortly glancing down to the tired baby boy in her arms and reaching out one hand to get the pacifier from the changing table and put it between Tommy’s lips. He lifted his tiny hand to form a fist around her forefinger and hold her hand close to him.

“Hi,” John whispered back. “Has Tommy still not fallen asleep?”

“We had some trouble with our bedtime drink today,” Felicity replied with a wink, not wanting to explain more explicitly that Tommy had refused to drink his milk when she had taken him here an hour ago to breastfeed him because he had wanted to cry full-throatedly instead. “What are you doing here? Taking a break from our girls?”

John chuckled. “Although I have to admit that they can be quite exhausting with their desire to start their own band, that is not the reason I am here right now.”

Felicity frowned at him. “Everything alright?”

“Not sure,” John said, stepping closer to her. He took Tommy from her arms and cradled him against his broad chest. Tommy let go of his mother’s finger to form a fist around the fabric of his uncle’s shirt. “I think you should check if Oliver is alright.”

Felicity opened her mouth to ask if something happened because when she had gone upstairs an hour ago to put Tommy to bed, Oliver had been fine. He had been more than fine actually. He had been considering whether he should join Sara’s and Emmy’s band because they had begged him to so. He had been having fun. And there had been no sign that something was bothering him. Why would he be bothered? They had had a great day with their friends and family.

But John gave her a look Felicity knew well by know. Since they had started working together in the Arrow cave, he had looked at her like that from time to time to wordlessly tell her that Oliver was in broody mode. There were different subcategories of that that expression, telling her whether it was unnecessary brooding, brooding they should worry about or, like in this case, brooding John didn’t know how to categorize.

So Felicity nodded her head shortly and asked, “Where is he?”

“On the balcony, I think,” John answered. “Go. I’ll take care of Tommy.”

“Thanks,” Felicity said hastily, squeezing John’s bicep when she was walking past him and hurrying towards the bedroom.

Oliver had a past of brooding, but like so many other things he had used to do in the past, brooding had become less over the years. Less intense, less often. And when he was brooding after all, he usually opened up to her. Years of first being friends and then being together and finally being married had taught both of them that they worked best together and trusted each other with what was possibly bothering them.

As soon as she had opened the door to the bedroom, she could see him. He stood on the balcony, just like John had told her, with his forearms propped up onto the handrail and his head lowered. Felicity frowned slightly, a little worried what was going on, because Oliver loved having everyone around for something else than a mission. Celebrating the kids’ birthdays or coming together for a christening – he just loved it. So the fact that he was worried now, did make her a wonder what was going on even more than when he was usually brooding.

She opened the door to the balcony and stepped out, intending to say something comforting or something else that would make him aware of her presence which he was probably already aware of because the door always creaked a little when it was being moved and even if it wouldn’t, Oliver would still have his supersenses, but it was never wrong to make sure he really knew. Anyway, before she got the chance to say anything, Oliver turned his head towards her and smiled sadly.

“Hey,” he said in a whisper.

“Hi,” Felicity said back, stepping closer until she was right beside him, so she could put her arms around his bicep and rest her chin on his shoulder, waiting for him to be ready to tell whatever was bothering him.

It didn’t take long before Oliver took in a deep breath and asked, “Do you remember that I once told you that I got a girl pregnant shortly before the island and she lost the baby?”

Felicity needed a short second in which she wondered where this was going, but she finally nodded. “Sure.”

Actually she could remember very clearly how they had lain in bed together, snuggled up to one another, and he had told her about it. It had been at some point between their engagement and their wedding. Since they had gotten engaged very soon after they had come together, there hadn’t been much time to tell the other about all the possible skeletons they had in their closets. So they had caught up on that in the time before they had gotten married to make sure nobody would be shocked by anything in the past of the other they hadn’t known about until then.

Oliver had told her a lot of what had happened before and during his five years away, telling her everything he could remember and everything he felt she needed to hear. Knocking up a girl while having a girlfriend had been one of the things he had told her. He had even admitted that Felicity had met that girl once when they had been in Central City to help Barry years ago.

They had talked about kids for the first time then. Before he had told her about that, kids had never been something they had felt the need to discuss because it had seemed so far away anyway. But after that story Felicity had felt the need to know whether he wanted kids or not, not because that would have changed anything between them because she herself hadn’t been sure whether she had wanted kids at that point, but because she had felt the need to talk about the general idea of having kids together one day.

“What about that?” Felicity asked, pushing the memory away and cocking her head slightly.

After they had talked about the miscarriage that one time, Oliver had never mentioned it again. Even when Felicity had told him that she was pregnant and she had expected him to say something about that again, he hadn’t. So neither had she ever mentioned it again.

“Why…?” Oliver started, breathing out through his mouth loudly and lowering his head to look down.

Frowning, Felicity loosened her one hand from his bicep to caress the back of his head, gently massaging his stiff neck. And when she moved her hands to the side of his face, Oliver leaned into her touch immediately, snuggling his cheek into the palm of her hand. The stubble on his cheek tickled her slightly and she smiled comfortingly, but didn’t say a word, waiting for him to be ready instead of pushing.

Oliver took in a deep breath before he said without looking at her, “Why would I deserve any more kids?”

Felicity’s frown deepened. It wasn’t the first time Oliver wondered about whether or not he deserved the life he had now – a life with a wife and kids and friends and peace and god knew what else. But it was the first time the cause of his doubts weren’t the things he had done since he had been stranded on the island and temporarily turned into a killer.

She waited for him to say something more, but he didn’t. So Felicity caressed his cheek that was still snuggled against the palm of her hand gently with her thumb, eliciting a deep sigh from him. She leaned against his arm a little more, reassuring him that she was here and he could talk to her openly. But still Oliver didn’t say a word.

“Oliver,” she said quietly, squeezing his bicep comfortingly. “Why wouldn’t you deserve any kids because of that? The miscarriage was nobody’s fault. Things like that happen and there doesn’t seem to be a reason for that and-“

“I was so relieved,” Oliver whispered, barely audible for Felicity. “When she called me and told me she lost the baby, I was so relieved that she had lost it and I didn’t have to become a father and my father was never going to find out about that mess, I…”

Oliver’s voice broke and he shook his head, ducking it even further down between his shoulders that rose every time he took in a deep breath. Felicity moved her hand from his shoulder and to his back, comfortingly rubbing the hard muscles underneath like she did for their children when they were crying.

That was the risk with really good days. When you were deliriously happy, you started thinking about what you could have done to deserve that and for Oliver who for a long time hadn’t thought much of himself, it almost always ended in thoughts about not deserving what he had and worrying about how life was going to right this and take it from him.

And although those thoughts had become less, sometimes they were still there.

“Life doesn’t work like that, Oliver,” Felicity told him quietly. “Because you didn’t want one child, doesn’t mean you don’t get to have others.”

Oliver took in another deep breath and when she felt him shifting, she lifted her head from his shoulder to look at him, seeing that he was turning his head to look back at her with a broken expression in his eyes that Felicity felt she had seen too often on him. She expected him to say something, but he didn’t, instead waiting for her to continue.

“I am not exactly defending…” she started but broke off, thinking about a different was to express what she was thinking. “Before the island you had some good characteristic features. You were a good brother for example. But you were also an egoistic, cheating, spoilt boy.”

She stopped for a second, only looking at Oliver, and he nodded quietly.

“I think we can both agree that the person I was before the island wasn’t much likeable,” he murmured.

Felicity smiled shortly, leaning her head forward to press a kiss to his clothed shoulder, and Oliver sighed almost comfortably.

“He wasn’t,” she then agreed which earned her a slight uplift of the right corner of his lips. “But you said it yourself, it’s the person you were before the island that was egoistic, cheating and spoilt. You’ve become a completely different person and this person is wonderful and has a better heart than most people I have met and is kind and loving and sweet and caring and thoughtful and supportive of the people around and a great cook and sexy as hell on the salmon ladder… or in general for that matter and good in bed and-“

“I think now you’re trailing off a little bit,” Oliver warned, a barely visible grin on his face.

Felicity cleared her throat hastily, realizing that her ramble about Oliver’s good qualities had indeed gotten out of hand a little bit. “What I am trying to say is that you have become a wonderful person. And you’re a great husband and an amazing father. I don’t know if what you have done before the island had been so bad that you wouldn’t have deserved a family later on because it’s not something I or anyone else for that matter can answer, but for you it might have seemed like you wouldn’t, but the man you are now, he definitely deserves all of this and so much more. And, Oliver, the fact that you doubt that is only proving it more. A lot of people make mistakes, but you worked hard on yourself and have become this amazing human being and constantly feeling like you wouldn’t deserve the life you have, is not fair to the person you are now. You weren’t ready to become a father back then.”

“My mother said the same thing,” Oliver said.

Felicity screwed up her face. “Is it wrong to feel slightly defended by that?”

Oliver chuckled, but it only lasted for a short time. Then he took in a deep breath, this time slowly breathing out through his nose and nodding. Felicity leaned over, intending to kiss his cheek, but Oliver turned his head, so their lips met each other’s. He opened her mouth to him with his tongue while simultaneously turning his body to her, so he could embrace her in his arms, hugging her tightly to his broad chest. When their lips parted, they were both slightly out of breath. Oliver leaned his forehead against hers and when she opened her eyes, she could see that his were still closed. The expression in his face had softened. He looked more relaxed than before.

“Thank you,” he whispered, breathing the words against her lips before brushing his own over them shortly.

“You’re welcome,” Felicity replied, rubbing his back. “Although there really is no reason to thank me because it was all true.”

Oliver opened his eyes, looking at her with a mischievous grin on his face. “Maybe not all of it.”

Felicity cocked her head while perking an eyebrow and Oliver chuckled, moving his hands from her hips upwards and downwards again.

“I am still spoilt because I have two great children and this smart, caring, beautiful and sexy wife who, whenever I feel that I cannot love her anymore, proves me wrong.”

“You know how much I love proving you wrong,” Felicity replied with a wink.

Oliver leaned over to kiss her once more and she let it happen, but way too soon for his liking she pulled away from him. And Oliver groaned quietly.

“We have guests downstairs,” she reminded him. “At least one of us should go back downstairs.”

“I… just need one more second,” he told her, putting his hands around the handrail and looked over their garden.

Felicity nodded. “Take your time.”

She was just about to leave when Oliver held her back with one hand to her hip. “Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she almost mouthed back and straightened up onto her tiptoes for a last kiss before she left.

Oliver took some deep breaths.

It had been some time since he had last felt like this. He couldn’t even say what exactly had made him think back to that baby that hadn’t been born before he had ever had the chance to meet it. Suddenly that thought had been there and it had immediately leaded him to the thought of why he would deserve Tommy and Emmy after he hadn’t wanted that other baby.

But he also knew that Felicity was right. He was a different person now. And the person he was would never abandon his child. Never.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not my best chapter, but it needed to be adressed, especially because... well... one day far but not too far in the future William will become a side character of "Time for a story".


	91. Diggle's special aspirins

“Again, daddy! Again!” Emmy begged and clapped her hands excitedly.

“No,” Oliver chuckled and adjusted the blanket he had wrapped Emmy in when he had put her to bed half an hour ago. “You promised me you were going to fall asleep if I did it.”

“Only one more time!”

“No,” Oliver answered, shaking his head and stroking his hand over his daughter’s head, tugging at her curls to make her giggle. “Mommy and daddy are going out tonight. Aunt Thea is coming any second to take care of Tommy and you. Promise me you’ll be a good girl and stay in bed?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“Really?”

She held her pinkie finger out for him and said, “Pinkie swear.”

Oliver linked his pinkie with hers and winked at his little girl. Leaning over her, he pressed a kiss to her forehead before he got up and moved to the door. His hand was already at the light switch when-

“Daddy?” He turned around and leaned into the doorframe, looking at his daughter with a questioning gaze. “Why are mommy and you going out tonight?”

“Mommy and I love each other very much, so I asked if mommy wanted to have dinner with me in a fancy restaurant named Big Belly Burger and go for a walk and maybe see a movie after that,” Oliver explained. “People who love each other do such things, but when they have babies there isn’t much time for it anymore.”

“I take care of Tommy more often,” she suggested. “So mommy and you can go out.”

“And who’s going to diaper Tommy when you don’t reach the changing unit?”

Emmy opened her mouth to reply, but then she only sighed and looked down sadly. “Right.”

“But thank you for the offer,” he said with a smile. He went back to her, leaned over her tiny body once more and kissed her lips shortly. “I love you.”

“So you’re taking me out for dinner, too?”

Oliver laughed, throwing his head back. “Not tonight.”

“Okay,” she sighed and he heard the rustling of the blanket when she turned around onto her side and made herself more comfortable. “Night, daddy.”

“Night, hon,” he replied, switched off the light and closed the door from the outside.

With a short glance towards Tommy’s nursery where everything seemed silent, he turned around and headed to the bedroom. He wanted to put on a different dress shirt, one that wasn’t full of Tommy’s spittle. It felt like forever since he had been out on a date with Felicity the last time and although they had been married for almost four years by now, he still wanted to look good when they were going out. Was that normal or was he being crazy?

“Hey,” he said when he entered the room and stepped right behind Felicity, who was standing in front of the mirror on the dresser, putting on the arrowhead-shaped earrings he loved so much. He let the fingertips of his right hand move over the due to the small back cut-out of her claret dress exposed skin and lowered his lips to the side of her neck, brushing them against her pulse point. “You look nice.”

“Hm,” she only made shortly.

Frowning about her reaction, he lifted his head from her neck and looked at her in the small mirror. Her face looked almost like it was made of stone. The expression in her eyes was deadly serious, no smile there.

“Hey, what’s going on?” he asked a little worriedly and put his hands to her upper arms, gently rubbing up and down.

He watched her reaction in the mirror closely. Her eyes glanced into his direction shortly before she shook her head, saying, “I just didn’t think we were keeping secrets or even worse lying to one another.”

When she took a step away from him and out of his arms, Oliver hastily turned her around on her shoulders and looked at her closely. “We are not keeping secrets or lying to one another.”

“Really?” she asked.

“Really,” Oliver answered firmly, but at the same time he already thought about what possible secret he could keep or what possible lie he could have told her. But he really couldn’t think about one and especially about none that could make her mad at him.

What would make her mad at him? Really mad?  
Had he slept with a girl named Emmeline because he knew if she should ever find out that he had slept with a girl that shared a name with their daughter, she would kill him. But he was pretty sure that he had never slept with a girl named Emmeline. He had never heard that name before Felicity had suggested it for their daughter.  
He wasn’t keeping secrets from her. And he wasn’t lying to her.

“Then what is this?” Felicity asked, holding out her phone on the palm of her hand.

Oliver frowned and was just about to answer that it was her phone – a phone he hadn’t kept secret from her and hadn’t lied about to her by the way – the phone made a noise and the next second he could hear his own voice coming from it.

 _“Look at this stuff, isn't it neat?_  
_Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?_  
 _Wouldn't you think I'm a girl_  
 _A girl who has everything?”_

The singing stopped for a short second only for his voice on the phone to say, “I mean, look around, Emmy! You have absolutely everything!”

A short giggle followed. Then his voice on the phone started singing to the melody of _Part of your world_ again.

 _“Look at this trove, treasures untold  
How many Nemos can one bedroom hold?_  
A lot! Obviously!  
_Looking around here you'd think_  
Sure, I’ve got everything

 _I've got a laptop and stuffed toys a plenty  
I've got whosits and whatsits galore  
_ You want a thingamabobs? I've got a thousand thingamabobs!  
_But who cares? No big deal,_  
 _I want more_

 _I wanna be where my parents are  
I wanna know_ \- I wanna know what they’re watching, sitting out there on the sectional couch watching the giant curved – _TV_

 _Flapping my arms, I don't get too far_  
 _my feet were designed for running, dancing_  
 _Walking along on those_  
What do you call 'em? Because I’m a baby. I don’t know.”

“Feet, daddy! They are feet! I’m not a baby anymore!” Emmy’s voice interrupted.

“ _Feet._

_Out where they walk, out where they run_   
_Up where they stay all day in the sun_   
_Wandering free_   
_Wish I could be, part of that world.”_

“Again, da-“

The excited shout of his daughter was interrupted when the audio recording ended abruptly. He stared at the phone for two seconds longer before his gaze finally lifted to her face that now showed a giant grin.

“You told me you couldn’t sing. Our whole marriage is a lie,” she said dramatically, barely being able to hold her laughter back. “Oh, and John is going to love this little recording.”

“You wouldn’t-“ Oliver started, reaching out his hand to take her phone from her, but before he could grab it, Felicity pulled her hand back, pressing it to her chest.

“I would.”

“No, you-“ Oliver started, taking a step towards her.

But Felicity turned around and started running away, shouting back over her shoulder with whispered voice to not wake the kids, “I will.”

Oliver didn’t even hesitate a second. He chased right after her. Because why not having a little fun before they left for their date already? Besides, he really needed to delete that recording because otherwise she was going to tease him with it for the rest of his life. It had been why he had made Emmy swear to never tell her mommy about the lullaby he sang her. He had-

“Felicity!” he shouted warningly and jumped into her direction with his hands reaching out to keep her from falling, but it was too late.

She missed the first step of the stairs. Her foot landed on the second step instead and the slippery material of her silk stocking didn’t give Felicity the stability she would have needed to offset the surprising movement. She reached out her hands for the handrail to prevent hitting the stairs with her head and back, but her fingers grabbed into the empty space. Her body fell back but turned sideways, so first her ribcages and then the side of her head hit the edges of the stairs. And helplessly he had to watch how she slid down the whole set of steps until she came to lie at the foot of the stairs.

Horrible memories flashed through his mind. Not even four months ago this had happened already. Felicity had fallen down the stairs. He remembered the blood that had pooled between her legs then, threatening to take both, his wife and his unborn child, away from him. He had waited in the hallway all night, first with only his friends by his side, later with newborn Tommy in his arms until finally he had been told that Felicity was okay, too. But it had been close. If Barry hadn’t taken her to the hospital that soon, maybe she wouldn’t have made it.

It wasn’t until Felicity groaned in pain that he finally got himself to move. He jumped down the stairs, taking several of them with each step. Then he jumped over her body and got down onto his knees in front of her. When she tried to sit up, he put a hand to the back of her neck, supporting her. She lifted her head and Oliver’s head skipped a beat at the sight of the blood that came from the wound on her forehead. It ran down the right side of her face and dropped from her chin onto her dress.

“I’m gonna take you to the hospital,” Oliver stated, sliding one arm under her knees and wrapping the other around her back to lift her from the floor.

Her head fell to his shoulder with a groan when he started moving towards the kitchen. He grabbed the keys from the kitchen counter and the unused dishtowel from the back of a chair, handing it to Felicity, so she could apply pressure to the wound on her head.

“We can’t leave,” Felicity groaned against his neck when he was carrying her to the door. “The kids.”

Oliver opened the door nonetheless, finding his sister right in front of it, her hand already reached out for the bell button. Her eyes widened at the sight of her brother holding a bleeding Felicity in his arms.

“What happened?” she asked.

“No time to explain. The kids are upstairs,” he told his sister, already walking past Thea and to the car. “They are supposed to be asleep, but they might have woken up from the turmoil.”

He sat Felicity down on the passenger seat, helping her to put on the seat belt. Thea watched from her position at the door, still in slight shock about what was happening. Oliver meanwhile hurried to the driver’s side, only adding that he was going to call her later. Then the door of the car closed, the car rolled onto the street and sped away a lot more quickly than probably allowed.

 

 

“Told you I could walk,” she murmured against his skin sleepily.

“Yes, you told me.”

“You didn’t believe me.”

“I didn’t.”

“But I am walking.”

“Yes, you are,” Oliver said with a sigh although a gentle smile was on his lips.

On their way from the hospital to the car she had stated over and over again that she could walk after he had insisted on carrying. But as soon as he had stopped the car in front of their home and had helped her to get out, she had sunken against him with her eyes closed and without any tension in her body almost like she had fallen asleep, only that she had talked nonstop. But when he had wanted to lift her into his arms, she had complained that she could walk on her own, so he had turned around and pulled her onto his back with her arms hanging over his shoulders.

He leaned his upper body forward to make sure Felicity wasn’t going to slide down his back when he loosened one hand from the back of her knee to open their front door.

“It almost looks like my feet are not even on the ground,” she said, moving her feet back and forth while snuggling her cheek against the side of Oliver’s neck. “Am I flying?”

“No, you’re walking,” Oliver replied and opened the door.

He immediately met Thea’s worried gaze. She was coming downstairs, standing in the middle of the stairs and looking at them. Oliver only shook his head, soundlessly mouthing, “Later.”

“I want to be flying.”

“Then maybe you’re flying.”

“No, no I’m- Oh! Thea! Thea’s here! Oliver, did we know Thea was here?” she interrupted her own sentence when they walked past Thea on the stairs. “Hi, Thea!”

“Hi, Felicity,” Thea said a little worriedly and glanced at her brother.

“She’s fine,” he explained. “They gave her oxicodone and she doesn’t respond well to it.”

“Oxycodone?” Felicity asked. “Oliver, what are you telling your sister? They only gave me Diggle’s special aspirins. No oxico- I am sleepy. Why am I so sleepy?”

“I’ll put her to bed and then I’ll tell you everything,” Oliver explained. He had wanted to call her earlier, but had realized that in his hurry to get Felicity to the hospital he had forgotten his phone. “She’s going to be fine.”

“Take me,” Felicity corrected, waggling her fingers in front of his face. “You’re gonna take me to bed. Not put me to bed.”

Thea nodded and Oliver continued walking upstairs.

“I think stairs hate me,” Felicity stated when they reached the top of the stairs. “This is the second stair that attacked me this year. They hate me.”

“I don’t think they hate you.”

“Yeah, better not think that. Or you’ll start putting arrows in stairs.”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

“Yes, you would.”

“If you say so,” Oliver sighed.

He was so relieved that she wasn’t on pain killers often and the effect of the drug would fade off in a few hours. As much as he loved his wife, taking care of a drugged Felicity was more exhausting than taking care of both of his children when they were crying at the same time.

“I am going to put you down on the floor now, okay?” he asked when they had entered their bedroom.

“Oliver, I am already standing on my feet,” she answered, still believing that she had walked up the stairs on her own.

“Right,” he whispered and slowly set her down, keeping her arms over his shoulders to make sure she wasn’t going to fall. Slowly he turned around to her and let go of her arms. She stood still.

“See? No hands!” she exclaimed happily, lifting her hands in the air.

“Felicity, why would you need your hands to stand?” he asked her seriously.

“I don’t know,” she whispered, sitting back on the edge of the mattress and letting her upper body sink back, too. “Oliver?”

“Hm?” he asked while he took off her silk stockings.

“Am I drunk?”

He chuckled sympathetically, took her hands and pulled her into an upright position. Her head fell against his abs and he cradled it to his stomach and stroked over her blonde hair.

“You’re not drunk. You’re drugged,” he explained gently. “They gave you pain killers, so they could do the stitches on your head.”

“Then why am I feeling so weird? Weirder than usually?” she asked, her voice sounding muffled against the fabric of his dress shirt.

“Because you never respond well to painkillers. And because you are tired which only makes it worse. You just need some sleep,” he said, kissing the crown of her head. “I am going to take off your dress-“

“Have sex with me,” she suggested.

Chuckling, Oliver threw his head back. When he looked down at her again, she had rested her chin where her forehead had been on his lower abdomen before and looked up at him with a mischievous grin. Her hands were roaming over his chest, starting to unbutton his dress shirt.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he said in a warning tone, but it only made her grin widening and a sweet giggle escaping her lips.

“O-li-ver,” she mimicked his voice, not stopping to unbutton his dress shirt.

“I am going to take off your dress, help you to put on your pajamas and then you are lying down and going to sleep.”

“I’m not tired,” she said with a yawn. “I want to do what this evening has been supposed to be for.”

“It had been supposed to be for dinner and cinema.”

“Followed by long, hot, passionate sex,” Felicity replied, pulling the hem of his shirt out from the waistband of his jeans. “We skipped the dinner and the cinema because of the stairs- do you think they hate me because I don’t worship them enough?”

Oliver needed a short moment before he realized that she was speaking about the stairs still.

“I don’t think that’s it,” he responded, using her distraction to hastily pull down the zipper of her dress and take the piece of clothes off of her.

He looked around for her pajamas, but didn’t find any. Probably because most of the time she just wore whatever shirt he had worn that day for sleep. The first thing she did after putting his clothes on was always lifting the fabric to her nose and breathing the scent of his skin that stuck to the fabric in. And then she smiled at him, bit down on her bottom lip and looked down with a smile. It was the most precious thing ever.

“Oliver?” she asked, her voice sounding much smaller than before.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, gently tugging a strand of her blonde hair that had fallen to her face behind her ear.

“Everything’s spinning,” she said.

“I know,” he whispered, stroking her cheek with the tips of his fingers. “Which is why we need to find your pajamas, so you can get under the blanket and close your eyes. The world will stop spinning when you sleep.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he answered.

“Can I get your dress shirt to sleep in?”

“It’s full of Tommy’s spit and your blood. I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

But Felicity wasn’t listening. Or she just didn’t care. Anyway she was sliding the fabric off his shoulders and pulled it towards her. She tried putting it on on her own, but when her right arm moved into the left sleeve, Oliver helped her.

“Oliver?” she asked again while he was buttoning her shirt up.

“Yes?”

“Do you think I’ll look as badass as you do soon?”

“What?”

Her fingertips grazed the scarred skin of his chest, her eyes following the movement.

“You have a lot of scars,” she stated like she had only just realized. She perked her lips in this cute way only she could. “I have a lot of scars now, too.”

“You do?”

She nodded. “I have the scars in my mouth and the one from the gunshot wound and one at the back of my head from falling down the stairs which lead to the emergency c-section that left another scar and now I have this scar, too. That’s a lot of scars. Maybe I’ll have more scars than you one day.”

“Let’s hope that is not going to happen,” Oliver replied when he lifted her from the mattress to pull the blanket away from under her and laid her down in the middle of her bed where she wouldn’t fall out even if she rolled and turned more often in her sleep than usually. Because he knew she did when she was high on painkillers.

“Party pooper,” Felicity grumbled sleepily.

Oliver chuckled. He leaned down and kissed her forehead gently. “I’ll gladly be a party pooper if that is what it takes to prevent that you are gaining more scars.”

“Party pooper,” she only replied, looking at him with glazed eyes.

“As long as I am your party pooper, I am okay.”

“Wouldn’t allow you to poop anyone else’s party.”

“Good,” he whispered and kissed both of her cheeks while he adjusted the blanket around her, making sure she was comfortably warm. “I love you.”

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Now that we have Emmy,” she said, her voice slurring more and more with every word, “am I still your girl?”

Oliver smiled, the memory flashing in front of his eyes like it had only just happened. Felicity had sat in front of him, voice slurring and eyes glazing just like now. She had been dressed in his dress shirt for the first time then. And she had told him how she had always been his girl, not his girl-girl, but his girl. And she had missed it after Sara had joined and she had felt replaced. Oliver had dreamed about this moment over and over again in the months it had cost until they had finally gotten together.

“I told you that you will always be my girl, Felicity,” he explained gently. “You always have been and you always will be. You’re my girl-girl.”

“I like to be your girl-girl.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned down and kissed her lips. When he pulled back, she was asleep already. A quite snort that made him grin widely escaped her lips. He stayed sitting at the side of the bed for some moments longer, just looking at her.

When he could finally get himself to move, he walked over to the wardrobe, grabbing the first shirt that he got a hold on and put it on. With one last gaze to the bed where Felicity was sleeping safely as the continued snoring proved he switched off the light and stepped outside.

“Oliver?”

“Yes?” he asked, turning around to look at her. She was still turned on her side with her eyes closed and some strands of hair across her face. If she hadn’t spoken, he would assume that she was still asleep.

“Are you going to delete the audio recording when you find my phone?”

“No,” he promised.

“Really?”

“Really. It’s my apology for ruining the date night.”

“I was the one who fell down the stairs.”

“I was the one chasing after you.”

“I was the one initiating-“

“Felicity, do you want to keep the recording?”

For a short moment everything was silent and Oliver already wondered if Felicity had fallen asleep again, when she murmured, “You’re right. It was all your fault.”

“And now sleep.”

“Oliver?”

He took in a deep breath, doing his best not to sigh. “Yes?”

“Can I send it to Diggle?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

“Okay,” she sighed, burying her head in the pillow shortly.

“Anything more?” he asked.

“Just one more thing.”

“And that is?”

“I love you,” she sighed, her last word ending in a soft snort.

Oliver smiled and although he was sure she couldn’t hear him anymore, he said “I love you, too” before he closed the door and left his girl-girl to her dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this will probably be forgotten in the excitement about the new trailer and the new episode, but since it was finished, I wanted to post it anyway. ;)
> 
> And since it took me so long to post this chapter because I was writing a one-shot that took so long, I start writing a new chapter right now. :)
> 
> Well... after I freaked out about the trailer we will get in a few minutes...


	92. My need to protect you

“How come you always get home when the kids are finally asleep?”

Oliver closed the front door behind him, cocked his head at Felicity, who was walking down the stairs towards him, and pursed his lips at the exhausted expression on her face. “Drama again?”

“Drama is an understatement,” Felicity replied.

When Oliver stepped to the foot of the stairs and spread his arms, Felicity sighed tiredly and closed her eyes. Wrapping her arms around his neck and snuggling her cheek against his, she sank against him and Oliver put his hands to the back of her knees to lift her from the floor and into his arms. While he carried her to the living room, he peppered her neck with sweet, little kisses.

“Everything was fine,” she murmured, eyes still close. “The kids were both asleep, so I made myself comfortable on the couch, watching TV. And then Tommy woke up and cried for an hour. And his crying woke up Emmy, who was so tired that she started crying, too, and-“

“It’s terrible when they are crying at the same time,” Oliver said between two kisses to her pulse point. “Because then they just encourage each other to cry more.”

“Really? Never occurred to me,” Felicity said sarcastically and sighed once more when she felt Oliver sitting down on the couch. “I’m tired.”

“Me, too.”

Felicity lifted her head from his shoulder to look at him. Frowning, she noticed the dark shadows under his eyes and traced them with the tips of her fingers.

“I thought everything had been quiet on patrol,” she stated. “You didn’t call in the others for back-up or technical support.”

“It has been quiet,” Oliver sighed. “Just a little group of criminals trying to break into a place. Nothing Laurel and I wouldn’t have been able to take care of without Roy, Thea and Dig. And there was no need for us to call you, especially since you seem to have had your own fight to fight with the kids. I am just tired.”

“You’re getting old,” Felicity almost giggled.

“I am going to show you how old I am getting,” Oliver almost grumbled before he put his right hand to the back of her head, wrapped the left arm around her waist and turned them, so Felicity’s back was pushed into the seat surface of the couch and he was hovering over her, his hips rubbing against hers immediately.

Their lips met in a fierce kiss, their tongues dancing with each other’s like they had done so often already. Felicity’s hands roamed over Oliver’s muscular back, making out the scarred skin under the fabric of his grey henley shirt to scratch gently. Her hips moved against his on own accord.

“I might feel a little less tired already,” she murmured against his lips.

Oliver’s right hand moved from her back over her waist and down her side to her leg. When his fingers got hold of the hem of her dress, he started pushing it up her thigh. The rough palm of his hand danced over the skin he exposed. When the tips of his finger made contact with her panties, Felicity moaned. Her hands moved under the fabric of Oliver’s henley, now exploring the scarred skin without any barriers between Oliver’s back and her fingertips. She smiled against his lips, knowing that she knew exactly where to find every single one of his scars. She had memorized his body perfectly a long time ago.

She was just about to take off his henley when Oliver froze above her. His muscles tensed, turning his body into a hard blanket of stone. His hips stopped moving, just as his lips did. And just when Felicity opened her eyes to see what was going on, Oliver turned his head towards the TV that she hadn’t switched off before and that now broadcast the local news.

“Oliver?” she asked with a frown because normally Oliver didn’t let himself get distracted from sexy times that easily. Even when his favorite hockey team was playing, he wouldn’t stop to glance to the screen.

But instead of returning his attention to her, Oliver pulled back from her completely, sitting back on his heels before turning around to face the TV completely and focusing all his attention on the screen. Felicity stared at him without moving, silently cursing him for building her up and then dropping her like – like you didn’t drop your wife after starting hot foreplay with the promise of passionate sex.

She already opened her mouth to say something when she overheard her name being said and she turned her head to see a photo of Oliver and her that had been taken the evening she had fallen down the stairs and born Tommy being shown.

“…during her husband’s mayoral campaign. Suspicious was that stagy fall down the stairs especially since it seemed to parallel his mother’s mayoral campaign that not only also focused on her family life but during which her daughter, Queen’s younger sister, got kidnapped and a video of the abducted Queen girl was shown on a locally broadcasted debate. The frequency of Queen family member’s being in mortal danger during mayoral campaigns already raised the question whether it was part of the Queen family’s campaign strategy since it seemed a little too conspicuous to be a coincidence and Queen’s surprising resignation after being confronted with those rumors seemed to only confirm the suspicions. Considering that she is now going to be head of a multi-billion dollar company, a fall down the stairs seems like a small price to pay. It remains to be seen if Felicity Queen will keep pretending or if, now that she has what made her marry Oliver Queen in the first place, she will put out her feelers for the next billionaire she could rob of a company or at least some money. A possible next victim could be Ray Palmer. The billionaire and the gold digger dated several years ago, right before the Vegas girl threw herself at her present husband. Palmer and his ex-girlfriend were seen together in March, though, when they visited a technology fair in New York together. Rumors said that little Thomas Robert Queen, the supposed second child of the Queen couple, might indeed be Palmer’s son. So maybe it’s time for Starling City’s most popular gold digger to move onto her next victim completely. Single ladies in the city could look forward to a newly bachelor Oliver Queen when-“

“I gotta go,” Oliver suddenly said, getting up from the couch determinedly and walking towards the front door to leave.

Felicity sat up hastily, putting her arm on the backrest of the couch. Her gaze followed Oliver’s movements towards the door.

“Oliver, you know that none of this is true,” Felicity stated, not even questioning it, because she knew that he knew. Even with his jealousy of Ray, there had never been any doubt that she loved him and only him.

At her words Oliver turned around on his heels, walking back and leaning over the backrest of the couch, so he could kiss her tenderly. Although unspoken, Felicity still got the confirmation. Of course he knew. He knew all of that. And when they pulled apart, the intense gaze on her face only increased the certainty with which she knew that he knew that all of what had been stated was a lie.

Felicity perked her eyebrow at the expression on Oliver’s face because she could see right through her husband and she knew that look in his eyes. She had seen it a lot, especially during her first months of working with him down in the Arrow cave. Never in a context like this, though.

“What? You’re going to defend my honor now?” Felicity asked and Oliver leaned over, kissing her again, a little more fiercely than before. When they pulled apart, his gaze had only increased its intensity. “Oh my god, you are going to defend my honor.”

“It won’t take too long,” Oliver promised like he had just told her that he was heading out to enjoy a beer with Roy and John. “Still, better not wait for me.”

He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head before he turned around and went back to the door.

“Am I angry because you think I need you to defend my honor or am I turned on?” Felicity mumbled.

Only that it was a little too loud not to be heard because right before the door fell shut, she heard Oliver replying, “Turned on would be my choice.”

 

 

_“Mr. Queen, first your sister got kidnapped while your mother was running for mayor, now your wife falls down the stairs in the midst of your candidacy. Is it part of the Queen family’s campaign strategy to call attention on your private life by getting family members in mortal danger?”_

Oliver would never forget that line. And he would never forget the face of the douchebag of a reporter who had asked him this, only few days after he had almost lost his wife and his son. He would have beaten the crap out of the guy right there if it hadn’t been for Emmy. He hadn’t wanted to scare his daughter, so he had only threatened that dickhead.

_“If I see you here again, I swear to God you will regret it.”_

That question had already been too much for Oliver to take because suggesting that he was using the lives of his loved ones for his political career was… He didn’t even have a word for that. He was used to being accused of cheating on her because his pre-island self had cheated. A lot. He hated being compared to that former version of himself, but he knew that it was his fault he had the reputation of being a cheater and hence he had to live with it, even if he hated it. But being accused of using Felicity and their kids for personal benefit, it was… unspeakable.

But accusing Felicity – his dearest Felicity – of anything like that was unbearable and unacceptable. He wouldn’t take it. He wouldn’t let the guy get away with it.

He slowly made his way through the dark hallways of the news network building towards where he knew the guy’s office was. The level was almost completely empty. There were only few offices where the lights weren’t switched off, but it was so quiet, it was easy for Oliver to get to where he knew that dickhead was, probably celebrating himself for sending such lies into the world.

Oliver’s gaze was already focused on the door when the first doubt hit him.

This wasn’t exactly a smart idea. Showing up here as the Arrow was probably not only not a smart idea but actually a very stupid idea. A stupid idea. A really, really stupid idea. Why would the Arrow, Starling City’s vigilante who fought crime, come here and beat that guy up because he had offended one of the citizens.

There were a lot citizens. A lot of them were offended someday. Never had the Arrow showed up to defend those people.

But it was Felicity.  
His Felicity.

He hadn’t been able to protect her when she had fallen down the stairs months ago, Tommy and she had almost died and she had ended up in surgery. He hadn’t been able to protect her last week when she had fallen down the stairs again.

Being offended and accused of being a gold digger and a cheater and god knew what else, that was something he could protect her from. So he would. Even if he knew she didn’t need it. _He_ needed it.

So although he knew better, Oliver opened the door with much more force than necessary and drew back his bow, the arrow pointing at the guy whose face he had remembered perfectly. Some nights he was killing him in his dreams, at least during the few nights he wasn’t dreaming about Felicity, Emmy and Tommy or about the island.

“Rick Coleman!”

The reporter jumped up from his chair behind the desk and hastily lifted his hands in the air. For this sight alone it had been worth coming here.

“You have failed this city,” Oliver stated with his dark Arrow voice.

“I- I didn’t- I didn’t- I-,” Coleman stammered. Another reason it had been worth coming here. Hearing the fear in the guy’s voice had been worth it. “What did- what did I- what did I do?”

“Your job is to inform the people of the city about news. There are people suffering in the Glades. There are criminals running around, hurting and threatening people.”

“Like you?”

Oliver drew back the bow a little more and the guy let out a frightened squeak. Oliver had to bite his tongue to not burst out into laughter. Tonight that guy was getting everything he deserved. Well, he actually deserved a lot worse, but this would be enough to calm Oliver’s anger for a while. And hopefully it was going to be enough to get rid of him for good. He didn’t want to be worried about his family being attacked every time the news were on.

“I am protecting innocents. You attacked an innocent family tonight instead of informing about crime. You could have used the time to do something meaningful, but-“

“Gossips sell!” Coleman tried defending himself.

With an angry growl Oliver released the Arrow and it ended up right next to Coleman’s head. He ducked down, crouching on his floor with his hands and arms protecting his head. Putting his bow on the nearest surface, Oliver took three large steps until he stood right in front of Coleman. He grabbed the reported on the lapels of his jacket and pushed him hard against the wall.

“You will stop starting rumors and you will start doing your goddamn job right. You will inform the people about what is important. You will stop attacking innocents,” Oliver growled, his arm tight on the guy’s neck. “If I have to come back, you’ll regret it.”

The guy didn’t react. He just looked terrified.

“Answer!” Oliver demanded.

“I understand!” Coleman hastily answered, nodding his head fiercely.

Without another word Oliver let go of the guy, not before slamming his back against the wall once again of course, grabbed his bow as well as the arrow he had shot in the wall next to Coleman’s head and opened one of the windows. He shot a zip line arrow into the wall of the next building. He only looked back shortly before he let himself be lifted to the roof of the building, disappearing into the night like nothing had ever happened.

 

 

“I still don’t understand what I am doing here,” Felicity explained, when they stepped into the elevator. “And I don’t understand why you invited a bunch of reporters to come here, too. I thought it was just us. Us and lunch. I am hungry. You promised me lunch, lured me with burgers and now you are letting me starve.”

“Don’t worry. You’ll get your lunch. Let’s just say that after my failed attempt to shut up that douche bag who offended you, I did what you always told me. I found another way.”

“Another way to shut Coleman up?” Felicity asked.

“Hopefully,” Oliver answered with a nod of his head. “But also to show the world how much you mean to me.”

When he had threatened Coleman two nights back, he had come home happily because although he had known that his reaction had probably been a little over the top and completely unnecessary for Felicity, he had gotten rid of some of the anger about the guy he had suppressed for so long. He had taken off his clothes and crawled into bed with Felicity, pulling her tiny body against his and burying his nose in her hair, inhaling her scent. He had slept safely that night, dreaming of only her.

But it had only taken until the next morning for the rage to awake newly. Because as soon as he had turned on the TV to watch the news, Coleman had been giving an interview in the very same newscast he was working for, stating that Felicity Queen might actually have an affair with the Arrow who had threatened him the night before.

Luckily, every proof that Oliver had ever been there, had been destroyed already. Felicity had taken care of the cameras before he had even come home that night. So basically everyone was calling Coleman a liar who just hated the Queen family that he had been picking on for months now and since the police had almost lost interest in catching the Arrow and his companions anyway, Oliver hadn’t been too worried about any consequences.

But he had been angry. Very, very angry. He had been about to just leave and rip that guy’s head off, but Felicity had simply sat down on his lap and told him to relax because as long as he knew and she knew that none of this was true, nobody else mattered. And when he had told her that he just felt like he needed to protect her from things he could protect her from to make up for the times he hadn’t protected her or wouldn’t be able to do so, she had framed his face with her hands and leaned her forehead against his and whispered, “Oliver, you cannot protect me from everything. And you don’t even need to. You’re always there when it is important and that is all I need you to do. You and I, we know the truth about our marriage and that has to be enough.”

And of course she had been right. It should be enough for him to know that they knew that their marriage was nothing like Coleman tried to make the world believe. He knew that and it should be enough. It was enough. But still Oliver couldn’t do any different than at least try and convince the world otherwise nonetheless.

And that was why they were here.

“So you’re going to go up there and give a speech?” Felicity asked and gestured towards the platform with the lectern when they entered the lobby where the mob of reporters was already waiting for him and taking a bunch of photos of the two of them.

“Hm-hmm,” Oliver confirmed with a hum and leaned down to press a kiss to her ear before whispering, “And you’re coming with me.”

Before Felicity got the chance to say anything, Oliver tugged at her hand to get her to follow him and didn’t let go of her fingers when he positioned himself behind the lectern, so she stood right beside him while the reporter took their photos, got everything on camera and yelled questions. Oliver only lifted his free hand and immediately everything fell silent.

“Thanks everyone for coming,” he started, shortly looking around the reporter’s faces before he continued. “Those last days had me thinking a lot. After I announced five days ago that my wife was going to take over the company, she was attacked by a certain reporter who called her a gold digger and other things I don’t want to repeat because I don’t think those lies are worth any more thought than I have given them already. Anyway, what those lies made me think about was whether or not I do have regrets about my marriage… and I came to the conclusion that I do have a regret.”

While the flashlights of the cameras were hailing down on them and the reporters started murmuring excitedly, hoping for some big revelation, Oliver felt Felicity tense slightly and cock her head at him in question. Oliver didn’t take his eyes off the reporters when he tugged Felicity closer to his side and slid his arm around her waist, securing her to him.

“Marrying Felicity was the best decision I have made in my entire life,” Oliver stated and he felt Felicity relax against him. Her eyes were still focused on him. He could feel her gaze on his skin. “But I was so focused on getting married to her that when Felicity told me before our wedding that she couldn’t wait to be my wife and hear people refer to the two of us as Mr. and Mrs. Queen like we were one, I only saw the big game. The two of us together. What I didn’t see was what she gave up. Her name.”

Oliver couldn’t bear not looking at her any longer. He glanced towards her, seeing her smiling softly, shaking her head barely for him to see and wordlessly telling him that it was nothing he had to worry about or overthink.

“Felicity Smoak became Felicity Queen without second though on giving up her name. And that is my regret because looking back now, I wished I had thought about it for just a split second and convinced her to go with Smoak-Queen or Queen-Smoak instead. It would have been a symbol for the new start for both of us, a symbol of the new life we were going to start,” he explained, barely holding back a sigh. He glanced at Felicity once more and saw she was still smiling at him. So he matched her smile with one of his own. “I am not going to make that mistake again.”

Oliver waved in his assistant’s direction and Emily hastily moved over and gave him a small remote, smiling at her current and her future boss brightly.

“And that is why I think that Queen Consolidated needs a new name as a symbol for its new start with my wife in charge of everything. And I can only repeat what I said already. Felicity will be the best that has ever happened to the company, just like she is the best that ever happened to me. I dropped out of four colleges, while she graduated from MIT at age nineteen. I think it is pretty obvious who is the one making better decisions for this company,” he stated before he turned around to Felicity completely and held out the remote for her. “Just press the start button.”

He could see the hesitation in Felicity’s eyes and only smiled encouragingly until she smiled back and pushed the start button just like he had told her. The beamer was switched on and on a wide screen right behind them, the new name and logo of their company was revealed.

“Queen Incorporated?” Felicity asked, ignoring the turmoil that was created by the reporters.

“You like it?” he asked a little insecurely, pulling her further away from the microphone to make sure nobody could overhear them talking. “I was playing around with names and somehow this one just stuck with me. And the board liked the idea of creating a new image for the company, too. Those last years a lot changed and the new name could prove the newly won stability and-”

“It’s great,” Felicity interrupted his ramble with a wide smile. “But you didn’t have to rename the company. Your parents built this company and-“

“And now it’s yours,” he explained.

“It’s ours,” Felicity corrected.

Oliver smiled. “So you like your surprise?”

“It’s really great. Thank you.”

“And about that whole Coleman-thing…” he said. “I know that you don’t need protection. You could have easily made that guy’s life a living hell by hacking his social media accounts and destroying all of his work and replacing it with God knew that else, but… I just cannot stand reporters saying such things about you. I don’t want anyone to believe that you are that kind of a person or our marriage is any of what they said it is.”

“I told you, as long as you and I know the truth-“

“You’re okay with it,” he finished her sentence with a sigh. “It’s just that I am not okay with that. I cannot stand people talking that bad about you. Even if it is complete made-up bullshit.”

She didn’t say anything. Felicity just smiled gently and nodded, accepting his unnecessary need to protect her.

 “Felicity?” he asked after a while.

“Hm?”

“I am going to kiss you now.”

“To prove that we are happily married?” she asked.

Oliver’s grin widened when he pulled her in and brushed his lips against hers, pretending they were all alone.

“No,” he replied simply. “I am going to kiss you because I love you.”

“That sounds like a good reason,” Felicity replied with a grin as she got up on her tiptoes while he leaned down, so their lips met in a gentle kiss. And neither of them cared about the flashlights that were hailing down on them.


	93. Show the world what we've got

 

 

“Are the kids finally asleep?” Felicity asked without looking up from her tablet.

“Yes,” Oliver sighed, letting himself drop into the cushions of the couch right next to his wife. He leaned his head back and rested it on the back rest, looking up at the ceiling for a moment before he turned his head and looked at Felicity.

She was beautiful. After almost four years of marriage one would think that he already knew that, but sometimes it still struck him like a new realization, especially in comfortable moments like this when she didn’t even try to look pretty. Her hair was wrapped up in her usual high ponytail although it had gotten messy over the day since Tommy loved pulling his mommy’s hair, so he could grab a strand and take it into his mouth instead of using his pacifier. Her glasses had slid down to the tip of her nose and the blue-grey eyes behind them were focused on her tablet. Just like during their first meeting or at least the first meeting for her she was chewing on a pen with her lips closed around the red plastic.

“You’re staring,” Felicity said, still not looking at him.

Oliver smiled but didn’t say anything. He liked staring at her. Just like Felicity enjoyed watching him, especially when he was doing the salmon ladder, Oliver loved staring at her when she was working on her computers. While often his staring was accompanied by the background music of Felicity’s fingers dancing over the keyboard today everything was silent. The keyboard had been put away on the couch table.

“You’re still staring,” Felicity said like he needed to be embarrassed, but Oliver only smirked.

He slowly reached out his right hand and put it to the back of her neck, gently massaging the tense muscle underneath her warm skin. Felicity sighed and closed her eyes for a short moment, enjoying the relaxing sensation. Oliver smiled comfortably at the sight.

“You’re too good with your hands,” Felicity sighed, leaning further back, so Oliver’s fingers dug more firmly into her skin.

“Really?” Oliver asked, his smile turning into a smirk. “Do you want me to show you how good I really am with them?”

Saying those words, he let his hand lower along her spine and over her hip to the inside of her thigh. Felicity opened her eyes and looked at him, but put her hand around his wrist and pushed his hand back onto her back.

“Keep that thought in mind,” she told him when he cocked his head at her in question because Felicity was usually not turning down sex, especially since they barely had time for sex lately. Tommy was just taking too much of their time and leaving them exhausted. “I have to finish here and then you can prove to me how good you are with your hands… and certain other parts of your body.”

She winked before she focused her attention back onto her tablet. With a low sigh Oliver slid closer to her on the couch, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and following her gaze to the screen. He had expected her to work on something for Queen Con- Incorporated, he hastily corrected in his mind. Although she hadn’t officially gone back to work yet, she was already working on some things from home, planning the work she would have to do in her first months as CEO. But instead of working documents he found-

“Instagram?”

Felicity smiled amusedly at the tone of Oliver’s voice that left absolutely no doubt in how little he liked social media. He kind of hated them, no matter how often Felicity had tried to drag him into that world with her, telling him it was going to be fun.

“Well, I was just looking at some of the pictures of Tommy and Emmy on my phone and I realized I haven’t posted anything in a while.”

Oliver sighed. “I don’t get why you are posting any pictures there anyway. Seriously, we have enough people putting their noses into our lives as it is.”

“Oliver, you are sending a hundred photos each week to like everyone we know and that is including your assistant and the guy who lives at the other end of the street.”

“Emily knows the kids since they have been born,” Oliver defended his random baby photo attacks on their friends, family and other people. “And the guy at the end of the street is a friend.”

“Really?” Felicity asked, perking her eyebrows doubtingly, but Oliver nodded. “What’s his name?”

“Darren Hunter,” Oliver replied.

“What does he do for a living?”

“He’s working as a fitness trainer.”

“Where?”

“In that new gym right next to your favorite coffee shop. I don’t remember the name.”

Felicity bit her tongue. She hadn’t known that Oliver knew that much about the pretty guy who had recently moved into the house at the end of the street.

“How come he has never been here if you two are best buddies now?”

“Because I was really busy lately. And he has just moved in and is new in his job,” Oliver replied. “There wasn’t time for that yet.”

“Really?” Felicity asked and again Oliver nodded. “So it has nothing to do with the fact that he gave me his number when I came back from that morning jog – a terrible idea by the way! I still feel each of my muscles and that morning jog was a week ago. Next time I say I will go out for a jog, please tie me to the bed – and you almost broke his hand when he introduced himself to you and your handshake got a little… intense?”

“Can we go back to the tying you to bed, please?” Oliver asked.

“No,” Felicity replied.

Oliver perked his lips, not answering for a while. Felicity watched him closely. She knew exactly why Darren Hunter was getting those photos. Just like when Felicity showed photos of their family to women who were hitting at Oliver a little too aggressively, Oliver showed photos of their family to guys who were hitting on her. Neither of them was really territorial about the other in any way. It was more like… maybe a running gag between them, teasing each other with unneeded jealousy in front of people who were trying to hit on the other.

“To be fair,” Oliver explained sheepishly, “the guy undressed you with his eyes, even when I was standing right next to you and stated very firmly that we are married.”

Felicity chuckled lowly before she shook her head and stated, “Anyway, posting a photo on Instagram every once in a while is just easier than sending it to everyone. Besides, there are always funny conversations when everyone is commenting on those which you knew if you just took a look at the account I created for you.”

Oliver snorted. “I don’t do social media.”

Rolling her eyes, Felicity changed her position, so she could snuggle closer to Oliver and show him the tablet.

“Let’s find a photo we can both agree on sharing with the world.”

“I don’t want to share my love for my family with the world,” Oliver responded, pouting slightly but still wrapping his arm around Felicity’s shoulders and pulling her closer.

“That would be a little more convincing, my dear, if you hadn’t declared your love for me during a press conference that had been broadcasted live in TV and radio and then renamed your company because of said love,” Felicity said, patting his thigh gently. “Come on, just one photo. Please.”

Oliver frowned at her. Felicity wasn’t exactly a person to present herself in media. Their experience with paparazzi hadn’t really made them trustful towards them and although social media were something completely different, Oliver knew that Felicity just generally didn’t like to be the focus of attention. She liked to be the focus of his attention but not necessarily of the attention of everyone else.

“Why is that so important to you?” he asked her.

“It’s not important. I just think that if there are photos of our kids floating around in the internet, I would like to control which photos those are. The more we give them, the more they leave us alone. At least I hope so.”

Oliver nodded slowly. It did make sense. And still he could see in the way she glanced shortly at him from the corner of her eyes that there was something more. Just like she had known that Darren Hunter was not Oliver’s friend, he knew that there was something else that pushed her towards posting photos.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he said in the usual tone he said when he knew she was trying to keep something from him and Felicity perked her lips in the cute way she always did when he said her name like that. They looked at each other like that for a long moment before Felicity finally sighed, admitting defeat.

“Fine,” she said, switching the tablet off and throwing it to the empty place on the couch next to her before she turned her hips and mover her right leg over Oliver’s thighs, so she was straddling him. While her arms wrapped around his neck, his bent around her waist. “I like putting photos of the kids and you or us there because I like showing what I have accomplished.”

Oliver frowned. “You have graduated MIT at nineteen. You’re an everyday hero with your godlike computer skills. You’ve become one of the youngest VPs in the history of multibillion-dollar-companies and you are now the head of said company. And your children and husband are what you want to show the world you have accomplished?”

“Well, I can hardly post photos of the lair. Everybody knows about my MIT graduation and my VP position and I am not working as CEO of Queen Inc. yet,” Felicity replied, playing with the topmost button of Oliver’s dress shirt. “And I want to show to the mean girls that I got the perfect family.”

“What mean girls?”

“I told you about the mean girls,” Felicity answered. “The mean girls in school.”

“When you said mean girls in school, I was thinking about little girls pulling your hair like Thea and her best friend did on a daily basis when she was six.”

“Well, we were out of the age to pull hair. And it wasn’t really bad. They just said that I was the kind of girl who would work her butt off and be alone for the rest of her life, focused on work,” Felicity explained with a shrug of her shoulders. “And although I don’t think that that is necessarily something bad because being a tough business woman is actually something to be proud of, I do feel the need to show them that they were wrong.”

“And you do that by…?”

“Posting a photo of my babies that are sweet as sugar and my husband that is hot like fire every once in a while,” Felicity answered with a wide grin, unbuttoning the button she had played with before and lowering her head, so she could brush a gentle kiss to Oliver’s pulse point. “You know, I have the hottest husband and the most perfect babies. And I really like to rub their noses in the fact that I’ve got both – a career and a family. Well, the career is on hold right now, but it will get back on track and then I will have so proved them wrong.”

“They really said something like that to you?” Oliver asked. “That you will be alone because you’re smart and destined for a career?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t think they meant it in an offending way. They just said it like it was a fact. Women need to decide between careers and babies. I knew back then that they were wrong… Okay, I didn’t know-know, but… I knew it wasn’t as impossible as they made me believe. And now look at me my amazing husband and my wonderful children… It’s no fun being right when you cannot rub their noses in that.”

Oliver chuckled. “I know how much you love to be right.”

“Well, loving to be right is better that hating to be wrong like you do.”

Again Oliver chuckled. Straightening up, he brushed his lips against her shortly before pressing them down completely and giving her a gentle kiss.

“Let’s find a photo to convince the mean girl that Felicity Smoak got exactly what she wanted and deserved,” Oliver pronounced, grabbed her tablet and switched it back on to look at the photo collection.

There were a lot of photos on Felicity’s tablet which was kind of ironic given that she always teased Oliver about how many photos he took of their children. As recently as yesterday she had stated that she was only taking photos every once in a while and only to send them to him and make him smile during a long day in the office or to send them to her mother when she was begging for photos of her grandchildren. But of course Oliver had known that Felicity was just as addicted to taking photo of their babies as he was himself.

“How about this?” Oliver asked, pointing at a photo that showed Felicity sitting on the couch with Tommy resting on her outstretched legs and Emmy leaning over the boy and kissing her brother’s forehead from upside down. Oliver remembered taking that one. It had been last Sunday. They had spent the day comfortably at home and that moment had just happened like that, no planning needed. “I think I will rather add this to our secret collection.”

Felicity smiled. As much as Oliver loved sharing photos of their kids with their friends and family, there were certain photos he kept for himself. Only he, Felicity, Emmy and Tommy were allowed to see them.

“Okay, what about this?” Felicity asked, pointing at a photo she had only recently taken, this morning to be exact.

“No way,” Oliver said, accentuating both words the same. “There is no way you are going to post that.”

“Please,” Felicity asked, making a pleading face with her bottom lip pushed forward. “Please, please, please.”

“No,” Oliver said firmly but chuckled. “This photo shouldn’t even exist, so there is no way that you are-“

When Tommy’s cries sounded from the baby monitor, Oliver sighed and pushed Felicity off his lap. With a short kiss to her lips he went upstairs to get their baby boy back to sleep.

 

 

Almost an hour later Oliver had finally managed to get Tommy to fall back to sleep and found Felicity sitting on the couch where he had left her, watching TV. Sighing, he sat down next to her and smiled when she immediately curled up against his chest.

“Did he fall back to sleep?”

“Yes,” Oliver said. “Took him long enough. Did you-“

When his phone beeped, telling him he had received a message, Felicity entangled herself from his arms and got up from the couch.

“Do you want some wine? I could get us some- Yes, I will get us some wine,” she said, slowly starting to walk backwards and never taking her eyes off Oliver.

“It’s Thea,” Oliver said with a frown. “She sends me a lot of laughing emjois and says I look very terrifying when- Felicity.”

“Uhm… Wine. I will get us wine,” she said and hastily started walking away. When she heard him following her, she started running, but just as she had reached the kitchen, Oliver’s arms were wrapping around her from behind and he pulled her back against his chest.

“Did you-“

“Post a photo of you and our son sleeping?” Felicity asked. “No.”

“Really?”

“No, that must have been someone else…”

Oliver leaned his lips against her ear and kissed the shell before he pressed his hips against her behind and whispered, “Guess who will pay for that tonight?”

Felicity was just about to answer when the baby monitor gave alarm again. Oliver groaned.

“I guess punishment will have to wait,” Felicity said, taking his arms from her and turning around to brush her lips against his.

“We both know that when he wakes up after his usual hour of crying, we will have to take him to bed with us,” Oliver grumbled.

“Yeah, I know,” Felicity sighed. She kissed him once again and started walking towards the stairs.

“Felicity?” Oliver held her back, leaning into the doorframe.

“Yes?” she asked, turning back around to him.

“You know that we will have to talk about you posting that photo,” he explained, “and with talk I mean having sex.”

“I was counting on that,” Felicity replied and winked at him before she went upstairs to get their baby boy.

Oliver pulled his phone back out of the pocket of his jeans and looked at the photo Felicity had posted. He should have probably added it to the private collection when he had had the chance.


	94. Superhubby

Just a few more weeks, Oliver thought with a sigh when he parked the car in the garage and turned off the engine. Only a few more weeks were separating him from becoming a fulltime dad and he just couldn’t wait for the day to finally come. Spending time with Emmy and Tommy, cooking lunch for them and even doing the housework would be so much fun than working for Queen Inc.

Sighing once more, he loosened his tie and opened the topmost button of his dress shirt. Getting rid of those clothes was one of the things about being a fulltime dad that he just couldn’t wait for. The only reason why he would put on a suit and a tie after he had passed his position to Felicity was to turn on his wife because he knew how much she loved seeing him in suit and tie. He would even up the stakes and put on tuxes and a bowtie. As long as it was just for her.

Smirking at the thought that maybe he would keep the suit on until the kids were in bed and then use the effect the clothes had on Felicity for him, he got out of the car and walked towards the front door, already fumbling for his keys. Sexy times had been cut short since Tommy’s aversion for sleep had increased. Lately he was crying all day long, only stopping for a few hours of sleep. Even during feeding times he was restless which meant it took much more time to feed him than it should take.

Hopefully it had gotten better, Oliver thought, but his hopes burst like soap bubbles when he reached the door and heard Tommy crying even before he had opened the door. If Oliver had always thought that Emmy had inherited her mother’s loud voice, Tommy had definitely not only inherited but enhanced it. Laurel’s Canary Cry was nothing compared to that boy’s cries.

Oliver opened the door and stepped into the house. Without the outside walls of their house separating them, Tommy’s cries were so much louder. They hurt in Oliver’s ears and the pain seemed to reach places deep inside of him. If they could bottle up Tommy’s cries, they would have a powerful weapon at hand. It was a miracle Felicity wasn’t deaf already.

He put his briefcase next to the stairs and followed the sounds of his son’s cries, wondering if Emmy was trying to calm her little brother down. It was the only apology he would accept for the lack of an appropriate welcoming with jumping up at him and kissing his face like she usually did, though those welcomes had become less since Tommy had been born and replaced him as her favorite man in the little girl’s heart. When Oliver entered the living room, though, the first he noticed was the lack of his tiny, blonde mini genius and he frowned.

The frown only deepened when he realized that his other blonde genius, lying on the couch with her forearms hiding her face and little Tommy squirming on her chest, was crying. He could see the wetness on the parts of her cheeks he could see peeking out from under her arms as well as in the way her body shook slightly from the quiet sobs that were muffled by her arms and drowned by Tommy’s louder cries but still audible for him.

“Felicity?” he whispered.

At the sound of his voice she sniffled and hastily wiped the tears from her eyes, sitting up on the couch and carefully rearranging Tommy, so he was now lying on her crossed legs, still squirming and crying. Putting on a smile, she stated, “I didn’t hear you come in. I-“

Oliver crossed the distance between them and leaned down. Framing her face with his hands, he dried some of the wetness on her cheeks with his thumbs before he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her gently. He could taste the salty remains of her tears and feel some more tears streaming down her cheeks. When their lips parted, Felicity rested her forehead against his and Oliver watched her pained face, patiently waiting for her to tell him what was wrong although he had a good idea of what was going on.

“I have a terrible headache,” she whispered, almost breathing it against his lips. It was barely audible with Tommy’s cries. “I asked Lyla to pick up Emmy, so she can play with Sara and I love our son, but he’s been crying almost the whole day and now I also have earache and I am tired and frustrated. I mean… I did absolutely everything I could do to calm him down. I fed him. I pushed him around in the baby carriage. I let him rest next to the washing machine, so he could listen to the sounds, but it didn’t relax him. I-“

Oliver ended her ramble with a gentle kiss to her lips. The kiss was unhurried like there wasn’t a little baby crying inconsolably. Oliver pecked her lips a few more times, brushing his own against hers for a short moment, before he wiped the new tears that had rolled down her cheeks away with his thumbs and leaned away far enough away to look at her.

“Go upstairs,” Oliver told her with soft voice. “Go upstairs. Take a bath. Relax. And then go to sleep. He is getting hungry soon enough.”

Felicity let her forehead sink back against his and chuckled tiredly. “You just came home from work. Shouldn’t I be the one telling you something like that?”

Now it was Oliver’s turn to chuckle. “No, you shouldn’t because it’s weekend and on weekends I have the privilege of taking care for the kids.”

“Privilege?” Felicity asked doubtingly, looking down at Tommy and rubbing his tummy slightly, but it didn’t change anything about the loud cries escaping their son’s lips.

“Believe me, when you’ve been stranded on an island for five years and felt like you won’t ever have a happy life again, holding your baby, even when it is crying like crazy, feels like a privilege,” Oliver told her with a wink and lifted Tommy from her legs into his arms, resting the little boy against his broad chest. He pressed his lips to the back of their son’s head and leaned back into the cushions comfortably before he took one hand from his son’s back and cupped Felicity’s cheek. “Go get some sleep. We both know I can’t sleep without you being there anyway and I am not tired at all. So go get some rest. If we need you, I’ll come get you.”

Felicity sighed, got up onto her knees and leaned forward until her lips almost brushed against his. “You’re amazing, you know that? Best hubby and daddy ever.”

“I am trying to be,” Oliver replied with a confident smile. He loved being complimented by her, especially when it was about something domestic. Hearing he was a good husband and father still warmed his heart, no matter how often she had said it by now. “Best hubby and daddy ever for best wifey and mommy ever.”

Smiling, Felicity closed the distance between their lips and kissed him gently. She was about to open his mouth to her tongue when Tommy released an especially loud cry and with a groan she pulled back.

“I am going to take a bath and then go to bed. He shouldn’t get hungry anytime soon, but just in case you know where to find me,” she said, pecking Oliver’s lips once more before she placed a kiss to the same spot on the back of Tommy’s head that Oliver had kissed before and whispered into their son’s ear, “I love you, buddy.”

Oliver leaned his cheek against the top or Tommy’s head and rubbed the little boy’s back while watching Felicity leave. The way she walked with her shoulders slumped and head lowered showed how tired and exhausted she really was.

“Listen, buddy,” Oliver said quietly, continuing to rub his son’s back soothingly and ignoring the loud cries Tommy released into his ear, “I am going to tell you the same thing I told your sister when she was your age… or actually I think she was even younger than you, but she did the same thing you apparently did today. Here we go. You are lucky you are so small. If you were a little older and bigger, I’d totally kick your ass for getting on your mother’s nerves. Although she’d definitely be able to do that herself.”

Not even three years ago he had told Emmy something similar to this, using almost the same words. He remembered sitting on the couch in the house they had lived in back then with his daughter in his arms, telling her that. He had told Felicity to go to bed before, just like he had today. And then he had told Emmy the story of how they had finally gotten together. Or at least he had told her the version that had been appropriate for children. Felicity had been the one to add the parts that had not really filled his definition of being appropriate for children.

That had been an interesting evening!

 

 

Felicity turned around in bed restlessly, almost as restlessly as her son had squirmed in her arms before. After Oliver – god bless this wonderful man! – had told her to go upstairs and get some rest, she had taken a bath and actually dozed in the hot water for some minutes. But as soon as she had woken up, she had changed into her pajamas and gone to bed. She had heard that you couldn’t drown in the bathtub unless you are unconscious, but she didn’t feel a need to test it.

She was so incredibly tired. The day had been exhausting and with the little time she had had for herself without Tommy crying into her ear, the headache and earache had only become worse with every second. So lying in her warm bed without any sounds disturbing her should make it easy for her to fall asleep.

When she closed her eyes, she could actually feel sleep covering her like a blanket. Only that Felicity just couldn’t sleep. Something was keeping her awake and when Felicity opened her eyes and looked at the empty side of the bed next to her, she knew exactly what it was.

Sighing, she kicked back the blanket and got out of bed. Soundlessly she tiptoed downstairs towards the living room. She had left the door ajar, so she could overhear Oliver’s whispering voice and nosily leaned into the doorframe to just watch him. And if the head- and earache had decreased after her resting already, now it was like blown away.

Oliver was lying on the couch, his head resting on the one armrest and his naked feet on the other. His socks had carelessly been dropped to the floor, right next to his shoes and his suit jacket. He had unbuttoned the topmost buttons of his dress shirt, so Tommy rested right on his father’s skin, and the little boy had formed a fight fist around his daddy’s left forefinger. Oliver’s free hand was rubbing soothingly up and down their son’s back while his lips brushed against the baby’s dark hair every once in a while, interrupting the comforting words he whispered to the sleeping baby with his eyes closed.

“When you’re sleeping like that, nobody would assume that you’re actually a little gadfly, you know that?” he whispered, kissing the top of Tommy’s head once again. “You probably got that from your namesake. You know, my friend Tommy could also be a pain in the ass, but he was a good guy. And so are you. I am sure of that although your behavior wasn’t the best those last days. I told you it’s not exactly nice of you to make mommy’s life that hard because your mommy is the most amazing person there is in this world. She is smart and beautiful and caring. She is strong and… just wonderful in everything she is and does.”

Felicity smiled, feeling weirdly touched by his words even after all this time of being with Oliver and having heard him saying something like that multiple times already. She didn’t think she would ever get tired of it.

“Mommy does have some flaws, though.”

Felicity perked her eyebrows, crossing her arms in front of her chest and waiting for Oliver to continue. She was too interested in what flaws Oliver felt she had.

“She is a smartass,” Oliver started and Felicity shortly thought that it wasn’t her fault she was right most of the time before Oliver continued, “She cannot bake,” – Of course she could bake! Oliver just didn’t know what was good! – “no matter what she tries to make herself or others believe.” – Who was the smartass here? – “And she just doesn’t accept other people’s privacy.” – What?! – “Instead she just leans into the doorframe and listened when her husband and her son are having an intimate man-to-man-talk.”

Oliver blinked at her and Felicity grinned widely. She had been a fool to believe Oliver wouldn’t hear her. He always knew she was there when she was, nobody how quiet she would be. When his face mirrored the grin on her face, Felicity slowly walked over and crawled on top of him. Careful not to disturb Tommy, she pecked Oliver’s lips and snuggled against him. Her forehead rested against the side of his neck and her fingers entangled with Oliver’s on the back of their son’s back.

“Why aren’t you upstairs? Sleeping?” Oliver asked against her hair and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head like he had done with Tommy before.

“Bed felt empty without you,” Felicity replied with a sigh and nuzzled Oliver’s neck, breathing him in for a short second, before she rested her head back under her husband’s chin and took a close look at their peacefully sleeping baby boy. “How did you get him to sleep?”

“I didn’t,” Oliver sighed, now kissing the crown of Tommy’s head again. “He cried himself to sleep, basically passed out from exhaustion.”

“I feel like we’re doing something wrong,” Felicity almost whispered. “It was so much easier with Emmy.”

Oliver released a sound that made Felicity frown. She propped herself up on her forearm and looked at Oliver to see that he was trying to bite back a laugh. His lips were pressed together, his body slightly shaking from the attempt to not burst out in loud laughter. Felicity frowned even more when she asked, “Are you laughing?”

Oliver nodded. He took in a deep breath to calm himself before he answered, “You really don’t remember how hard it has been with Emmy at the beginning?”

Felicity frowned. Emmy was a little smartass and certainly exhausting from time to time, but most of the time she was the sweetest little girl out there. So Felicity’s frown deepened and Oliver breathed out a laugh.

“The first weeks of her life, she has been crying almost non-stop,” Oliver reminded her. “And only a few hours back I told Tommy about the night when Emmy has been… I think she hasn’t even been two months old then, and she has been crying all day and you have been that exhausting when I came home, I sent you to bed. I feel like we had had almost the same conversation about me having been at work the whole day like we had tonight. And just like tonight you came back downstairs because you couldn’t sleep when I wasn’t there.”

Felicity could almost see it in front her like it was just happening. She had lain down on top of him like she was lying on top of him now with her head resting on his shoulder. Her hand had cupped the back of Emmy’s head. And after she had told Emmy the story of how her parents had spent their first night together, they had put Emmy to her crib and repeated that night.

“How could I have forgotten that?” Felicity asked, remembering more and more moments when Emmy had been just as exhausting as her little brother was now.

“Because Emmy made up for it,” Oliver replied. “She was really exhausting when she was that small, sometimes she still is. But most of the time she is sweet and funny and tries to please us as much as she can. We forgot how difficult she was when she was younger screamed her head off like Tommy does now.”

“Right,” Felicity whispered, smiling softly.

She kissed the underside of Oliver’s jaw, letting his stubble scratch her sensitive lips before she lowered them down his neck and to his collarbone. Her tongue moved out to lick the soft skin that covered his chest and she felt Oliver tensing under her gentle caressing. Felicity lifted her head to look at him, seeing that his eyes were blown wide with lust. Those last days, whenever they had tried to have sex, something had come in between.

“Do you think when we put him to his crib-“

“He will start crying again?” Oliver finished her sentence. “Most definitely, yes.”

“Of course he will,” Felicity sighed. “But to be fair I’d be too tired for any bedroom action anyway which says a lot about my day, considering we didn’t have time for sex in how long?”

“Twelve days,” Oliver replied with a quiet sigh. “Twelve very long days. But don’t worry. It’s really comfortable like this. I don’t want to interrupt cuddle time with two of my loved ones. Only Emmy is missing.”

“You’ll have her back tomorrow morning,” Felicity said with a smile and closed her eyes.

“Thank God,” Oliver murmured. “I miss her already.”

Felicity sighed contently and when a thought formed in her mind, she grinned widely. She forced her eyes back open, so she could prop her upper body up on her forearm again and look at Oliver, who immediately met her gaze.

“You do know that your codename should rather be something like ‘superhubby’, right?”

Oliver chuckled quietly. “I don’t think criminals would be too impressed by that name.”

Felicity grinned but it turned into a yawn quickly and she dropped her head back to Oliver’s shoulder and closed her eyes, yawning once more. With Oliver being right beside – or rather under – her and Tommy being fast asleep, Felicity felt lulled in pretty soon. She sighed comfortably and turned her nose towards Oliver’s skin, breathing him in once more.

“Do I get a backrub tomorrow?” Felicity asked, already half asleep.

“Sure,” Oliver whispered his answer. “Maybe we can even do a massage with happy ending.”

“That would be nice.” Felicity sighed. “But we both know our kids can be pretty exhausting.”

“So maybe no happy ending,” Oliver almost chuckled against the crown of Felicity head before pressing a kiss to her hair. “Now sleep.”

Felicity sighed once more. She knew that Tommy was probably going to wake up in less than an hour, but she knew that she wouldn’t be able to fight sleep even if she tried to. So she snuggled up to Oliver as close as she could, almost trying to melt their bodies.

She was almost completely asleep when she whispered, “Oliver?”

“Yes, hon?” he asked, pressing another kiss to the top of her head.

She smiled against his skin, squeezing his fingers that were still entangled with hers on their son’s back before she whispered, “I still think ‘superhubby’ would be a nice codename.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was feeling a little... not so good... about the potrayl of Tommy - like he is the devilish child and Emmy is the little angel. But then I reread the first chapters and realized that actually Emmy was just as exhausting as a little baby as Tommy is.   
> Besides, from all the couples with more than one little child I know, most of them say, if it wasn’t for their second child, they would have a third. For some reason the second child always seems to be more exhausting. The mother of my Emmy and Tommy inspiration actually said something along the line, “For [Tommy] I could raise three [Emmelines].”  
> I just hope it’s obvious that Oliver and Felicity love both of their children although they seem to complain about Tommy a lot.


	95. The darkness inside of me

The bow was drawn back and the arrow pointed right at her face. If he let go of it now, it would end up in her eye, most probably going right through to her brain and killing her.

“Oliver?” she asked with whispered voice.

She had her hands lifted with her empty palms in his direction like she was trying to convince him that she wasn’t armed. Slowly she tried to take a step into his direction, but as soon as she put her first foot forwards, Oliver drew back the bow even more, signaling her that she should stay back.

“Okay, I am going to stay here,” Felicity said calmly, putting her foot back next to the other. “Everything’s alright. Nobody is trying to hurt you.”

Oliver didn’t react. He just kept aiming the arrow at her.

Felicity watched him closely. There was a slight tremor in his hand and sweat on his face. His pupils were blown wide, but unlike those times, when they were blown wide with lust, they were blown wide with something else tonight. Felicity couldn’t say what exactly it was, but whatever it was made him alert. It actually reminded her of how he was when he woke up from his worst nightmares, the kind of nightmares he only had on especially bad days like when there were storms or thunderstorms which luckily didn’t happen too often anymore, but when they did, they hit him even harder.

But Oliver hadn’t been waking up from a nightmare because he hadn’t been sleeping. Something else must have happened, Felicity thought and tried to go through everything that had happened tonight in her mind, trying to figure out what had caused this.

They had been at home when Thea had called and complained that she had barely spent time with her niece and nephew lately which had ended with her stating that she was going to come by and pick up the kids for a sleepover in the penthouse with auntie Thea and uncle Roy.  So when Felicity’s alarm system for the city had informed them about criminal activity in the Glades, she and Oliver had headed to the lair where they had met with Laurel and John. While the others had headed out, Felicity had stayed back in the lair for the first time in a long time. Most of the times she had managed things from her computers at home in the last years since it wasn’t exactly easy to bring little children into the basement of a club at night.

Anyway, Felicity had been listening to what had happened on the field over the comms. First it had seemed so easy, but then hell had broken loose and somehow the connection of the comms had been cut and Felicity had been sitting here in panic, not knowing what was happening in the warehouse she had sent the team to. She had felt lost because how could she be Overwatch when she couldn’t watch over the people she was trying to protect from her place behind the screens? It hadn’t been until John had called and told her that everything was alright that she had been able to breathe and only when the three of them had come back to the lair, Felicity had been able to relax completely although they had all been slightly hurt – nothing they hadn’t yet experienced in the years they were doing this now– by the drug dealers that had been a whole lot better armed than the drug dealers they usually had to put up with.

While Laurel and John had already headed to the back of the foundry to change back into their civil clothes, Oliver had made a joke about how Felicity could play doctor with him since Thea was taking care of the kids and she had straightened up onto her tiptoes to brush her lips against his which had ended in a long, heated make-out session that had only ended when Laurel and John had cleared their voices and told them that they were heading upstairs to grab a drink and that they were expecting them to join them in ten minutes or John would come downstairs and drag them to the club personally. Oliver and Felicity had groaned in unison at that because it had been so long since they had had sex, but it had also been too long since they had had a night off to spend with their friends, so they had compromised on quickly knocking back a drink and then heading home to have a night full of passionate sex all over their home.

When Oliver had changed, Felicity had needed one more second to finish installing an update on the computers, so Oliver had leaned against the med table and waited for her. The entire time he hadn’t said a single word, so Felicity had babbled like her life had depended on it. And it hadn’t been until Oliver had released a sound that had almost sounded like a growl that she had turned around and looked at him. His hands had been fisted on the top of the med table. His body had been tense and his face exhausted. She had gotten up from her chair and intended to approach him, so she could take a closer look and figure out if her babble was just turning him on more than it usually did already or if there was something wrong with him, but that question had answered itself when Oliver had gripped his bow and one of the arrows from his quiver that he had put to the med table before he had gone to change into his civil clothes and had aimed his weapon at her.

What had happened? What had happened?

“Oliver,” she whispered once more, trying to get through to him.

But Oliver didn’t react. He kept aiming the arrow at her like she was his enemy.

“Oliver, it’s me,” she said. “Fe-“

“Felicity,” he growled. “Run away.”

She glanced towards the door, shortly considering if she should indeed run and get John and Laurel down to help her here. But she couldn’t leave him alone. He was out of himself and a danger to himself. So leaving him alone down here wasn’t an option. It felt wrong because it was wrong.

“I am not leaving you,” she stated gently. “I am not leaving you.”

When Oliver didn’t react, she slowly took a step in his direction. This time he didn’t stop her, so she took another step towards him. She was only one arm’s length away from him. The arrow was still pointed at her face, but there was hesitation in his face like he was trying to doubt whatever had made him think that he needed to target her. Felicity took in a deep breath and stepped even a little bit closer.

Oliver’s intense gaze was focused on her face when she reached her arm out and let her hand hover over Oliver’s hand on the bow. Hesitatingly she lowered her fingers to his hand until her hand covered his. She stayed like that for a moment, letting Oliver get used to the touch. And only when there was no sign that her touch worsened whatever delusion he was suffering from right now, she started to increase the pressure of her hand on his, trying to push his arm away and make him lower his weapon. But Oliver growled at that and kept his arm where it was.

“It’s okay,” Felicity whispered. “Oliver, it’s okay.”

He still struggled against her hand, but it wasn’t long until he allowed her to slowly push his hand a little away, the arrow now being pointed at somewhere next to her face instead of her face itself. His face softened a little although he still looked exhausted and his breaths were still coming quickly.

“Everything’s alright, Oliver,” she whispered and carefully stepped a little closer. “You’re alright. I am-“

“Okay, we’ve given you enough time to- What the hell-?!“

“Oliver, let go of her!”

“Oliver!” Felicity chocked out and put her fingers around Oliver’s wrists, trying to get his hand to loosen the tight grip it had on her throat, but it seemed to not have any effect on him.

It had all happened so quickly. One moment she had seen the hesitation in Oliver’s eyes, the knowledge that something was wrong with him and that there was no need to threaten her with a weapon. The next moment John and Laurel had come in, Oliver had lifted the arrow again, releasing it into the wall behind Felicity. The arrowhead had grazed her cheek, distracting her for a moment, so she hadn’t seen him stepping right in front of her until his hand had closed around her throat tightly. She was desperately fighting for breath, all the while looking at Oliver, who just didn’t look like her Oliver at all. The gentle, loving expression in his eyes was missing.

When she felt her lungs filling with air, she sank down to the floor, coughing and holding her hands to her neck. As soon as the first shock was over, Felicity hastily lifted her gaze to see Laurel and John handcuffing Oliver to the med table. Laurel was trying to pin him down, but he was struggling too much even with the handcuffs cutting into his wrists. So she took a step back and only stepped forward again when John told her to keep Oliver’s head still while he poured a fluid down his throat. Oliver had barely taken three gulps when he turned his head to his right and started throwing up.

Felicity kneeled on the floor, watching helplessly. Her body felt numb. Her mind was running wildly, trying to figure out what had happened and what had gotten into him.

But once he had emptied his stomach with that magical serum she knew Oliver knew from the island, she could see some of the gentleness return to his eyes, right beneath the blurred expression of confusion and exhaustion. He looked lost, his gaze focused on her. So she hastily got up from the floor and stumbled to the med table, putting one hand on the handcuffed ones of his closest to her and cupped his cheek with her other hand.

“Oliver, everything is alright now,” she whispered to him and distantly felt John’s hand squeezing her shoulder comfortingly. “You’re alright. Everything’s alright. Now close your eyes and rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

As if he had only waited for her allowance, his eyes fell shut and Oliver fell asleep. Sobbing, Felicity let her head fall to Oliver’s chest, hiding her face against the fabric of his clothes and crying from shock of what had happened while John was rubbing her back the way Felicity herself always did for her children.

She had never been scared of Oliver. Even now she wasn’t scared of him because what had happened tonight had clearly not been him. He hadn’t been the one attacking her. There had been something behind this and even when she had been too confused by what had happened before to connect the dots, at the latest when John had poured the serum down Oliver’s throat, she had got it.

They had taken drug dealers out tonight which could only mean that Oliver had been drugged. Felicity pressed a kiss to Oliver’s forehead before she took a look at his neck and found the proof for her theory – a small red spot on his skin where the needle must have hit him.

When Laurel’s phone rang, she took a quick look at the display and said, “Looks like I’ve got work to do. Is he…?”

“He’s going to be alright,” John explained.

Laurel nodded and brushed Felicity’s arm with her fingers shortly when she went past her and left. Felicity listened to the sounds of her friend’s steps until she heard the door being opened and closed behind Laurel.

With a mixture of a sigh and a sob she let her head drop back onto Oliver’s chest. She pressed her ear to the center of it, listening to the even beat of his heart.

“He’s going to be alright, Felicity,” John whispered to her.

She let their friend’s words sink in and calm her down.

Oliver was going to be alright.   
Everything was going to be alright.

 

 

He woke with a terrible hangover. His mouth felt dry and his stomach was making him feel nauseated. One wrong move and he might be throwing up. His muscles felt stiff. There was an uncomfortable throbbing in his head and when he tried to turn onto his side, everything was spinning.

Groaning, he let his lifted chest fall back into the mattress, a weirdly hard and cold mattress. Oliver tried to open his eyes, but his lids felt too heavy. He tried to lift his hands to his face, so he could rub the palms over it and get rid of the exhaustion and tiredness, but he had barely lifted his hands when cold metal cut into his wrists.

Looked like Felicity and he had really used the night without their kids! A shame that he couldn’t remember, though! Maybe he should try to reactivate his memory by repeating the actions of last night. It would certainly help to chase away the feeling of nausea, too. That sounded like a good plan! At least one part of his body felt like this was a very, very good idea.

He licked his lips and took in a deep breath. With his eyes closed since his lids were still feeling so very heavy Oliver tried to sense her in the room, whatever room he was in. He could hear an even breathing somewhere to his right. He wasn’t exactly sure if it was Felicity, but since he couldn’t imagine someone else being here on the morning after a sex orgy that had ended with him being handcuffed to whatever surface, he just assumed that it was her.

“You might have fucked my brain out last night. Do you want to come back here and remind me of how exactly you did that?” he asked, realizing that his voice sounded weirdly hoarse even for a morning with a hangover. “I know at least one part of me that would be very appreciative.”

“Oliver, you know I like you, but I think our friendship wouldn’t survive something like this.”

At the sound of John’s voice, Oliver’s eyes suddenly snapped open and with an uncoordinated movement he sat up, hissing when the handcuffs cut in his wrists once more. He was dressed in the same clothes he had worn yesterday, so was his friend. Everything was spinning but still he knew that he was in the lair, nobody but John and him around. Where was Felicity?

“What the hell happened?” Oliver asked with a groan. He tried to lift his hands once more, still feeling the need to rub his palms over his face, but again the handcuffs stopped him. “Where’s Felicity?”

“She’s upstairs. She was here the entire night, but Thea called half an hour ago. The kids seem to have a cold. Felicity is calling the pediatrician right now,” John answered the second question before he crossed his arms in front of his chest and narrowed his eyes slightly. “What do you remember of last night?”

“We… took down some drug dealers on the Docks. When we came back here, Felicity and I agreed on having a night full of-“

“You don’t have to repeat that part,” John interrupted him hastily. “I have a way too visual idea of that from all the times I came down here when you were… busy. It’s not something I want to think about or ever hear of again. So just skip to after the conversation.”

“You told us to grab a drink with Laurel and you and… I think I went to change, but...” Oliver fell silent and shrugged his shoulders, not remembering what had happened then. His neck felt stiff and he felt the urge to massage the tension away, but the handcuffs kept him from doing so. “Can you… open these?”

“I can,” John answered, stepping forwards and opening the handcuffs.

Oliver massaged his hurting wrists shortly before he swung his legs off the med table and rubbed his hands over his face. He really felt like he had a terrible hangover. A really, really terrible hangover.

“So what happened after that?” Oliver asked John.

“Looked like they drugged you during the fight. You were a little out of yourself.”

Oliver almost flinched at the words, but instead just stared at his friend. John looked at him intensely and Oliver felt like there was a hidden meaning in the silent stare.

“Did somebody get hurt?”

John didn’t answer for some time. It made Oliver’s stomach cramp. During his first year back in Starling City he had been drugged with Vertigo and attacked John. Two years later he had been drugged with the improved Vertigo and realized that he had been scared of being himself. Thea had driven her car in front of a tree on her birthday and later killed Sara when Malcolm had drugged her. Bad things happened when people were drugged.

And his friend’s silence didn’t make it better. Just when John was about to answer, the door upstairs opened.

“Okay, Thea and Roy are taking the kids to the doctor and can babysit them for a little longer, though I think Emmy and Tommy should be home as soon as- Oliver!” she interrupted herself as soon as she saw that Oliver was awake and hastily ran over to him, flinging her arms around his neck and holding him close.

Oliver wrapped his arms around her instantly, holding her so tightly against him she was probably having trouble breathing. But instead of loosening his hold on her, he only kept her against him more firmly and shot John a questioning gaze. Felicity had run towards him quickly, but Oliver had had enough time to see the scratch on her cheek and the red bruises on her neck. He had seen marks like that before on people who had been chocked. When fingers buried into skin firmly, they left a mark like that. When he had first been drugged with Vertigo, he had held John in a chokehold, but he had fought him off.

John’s silent nod made Oliver feel more nauseated than he had ever felt in his entire life. He had been the one. He had been the one hurting her. He had been drugged and he had hurt her. His fingers had taken hold of her throat and tightened that hold on her until she hadn’t been able to breathe anymore. Had she been scared of him? Had she moved away from him in fear he could attack her again when she had freed herself? Was she seeing his raged face in front of her when she closed her eyes and was caught in a nightmare now?

As soon as John had left, Oliver lowered his head, burying his face in the crook of Felicity’s neck and breathing in the scent of her skin. His arms around her waist tightened even more, pushing him so close to her, it was almost liked her body melted into his and they became one.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered against her skin, gently kissing her pulse point without pressing his lips too firmly against the red marks his fingers had left on her skin. He put a hand to the back of her neck, bending her head back, so he had more access to her neck. His lips sought out each of the red marks he had left, caressing them in a soft way to try and make it better. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright,” she whispered, moving her fingers through his short hair. “It’s alright. I’m alright.”

When she felt his tears on her neck, she gently framed his face with her hands and made him pull back a little. He let go of her immediately, looking at her guiltily, but Felicity shook her head and put his arms back around her waist before she cupped his face with her hands again and wiped away the tears from her cheeks. Oliver snuggle his face into her hands, kissing first her right and then her left palm.

“Oliver, look at me,” Felicity whispered when he avoided her gaze and hesitatingly he looked at her. “This wasn’t your fault. You were drugged. You had no control over your actions. And the little control you had, you used to warn me and let me help you. And the bruises might look back, but they are not. Please don’t blame yourself for this.”

Oliver nodded slightly and when Felicity cocked her eyebrow doubtingly he released a weak smile and whispered half-heartedly, “No blaming myself.”

“Good,” Felicity replied and straightened up onto her tiptoes to kiss Oliver.

It was meant as a short brush of her lips against his, but as soon as her mouth was put on Oliver’s, he tightened his arms around her waist to pull her closer and opened her lips to him with his tongue. Felicity sighed into his mouth and leaned her body against his, responding to his desperate kiss by giving as much of her as she could. When Oliver pulled away and their lips parted, she watched the unfocussed expression on his face and put her arms around his waist, trying to secure his stand.

“Hey, are you alright?”

“Just dizzy,” Oliver answered.

He lowered his head, so his forehead rested against hers and closed his eyes. Felicity watched the pained expression on his face worriedly.

“Felicity…” he said in a whisper and his breathed ghosted over her skin.

“Don’t even try it, Oliver,” Felicity stopped him before he could say anything more. “We just established that this wasn’t your fault. And we did agree a long time ago that you pushing me away whenever something bad happens is not an option anymore.”

“Felicity…”

“No. You don’t get to push me away anymore. We’re married and we have kids. You don’t get to decide that none of this matters anymore because you were drugged and did something you would have never done otherwise and that you regret from the depth of your heart even though it wasn’t your fault. You and I are-“

“Felicity!” he interrupted her a little more harshly and before she got to go on with her ramble, Oliver just shut her up with a kiss. When he pulled away, he said, “I didn’t want to say anything like that.”

“You didn’t?”

“I didn’t,” Oliver confirmed and brushed his lips against hers once more. “I wanted to thank you.”

“For what?”

“For not running away despite what happened tonight,” Oliver answered and hastily continued before she could object, “I know it wasn’t my fault, but… Usually when we agree that it wasn’t my fault, it’s about something happening but not necessarily about something happening to you because luckily you barely ever get that affected by the darkness inside of me as you did last night and I-“

Felicity put a finger to his lips and shook her head. “Oliver, there is barely any darkness inside of you. There isn’t more in you than there is in John or me. What happened last night was caused by the drug dealers you fought off and maybe a little bit by the craziness of our lives.”

Oliver nodded. “It’s just that this feels so weirdly close to domestic vio-“

She cut him off with a kiss before he could finish that sentence and when their lips parted, she only shook her head and whispered, “Don’t.”

He nodded shortly before he lowered his lips back to hers and kissed her gently once more, wordlessly thanking her for everything she had done for him, especially not holding his actions of the last nights against him. When he broke the kiss, Oliver sighed and turned a little away from her, gripping the edges of the metal table and letting his head fall forward.

“Hey, you okay?” Felicity asked worriedly, putting one hand on his and the other on his back.

“Just dizzy,” he replied. “I think I need to lie down.”

“Okay, let’s go home,” Felicity suggested and pulled his right arm over her shoulders, so he could lean onto her for support.

When they started walking, Oliver pressed a kiss to her hair and whispered another ‘thanks’ against the crown of her head. Felicity squeezed his hand on her shoulder and only smiled at him lovingly which made him kiss her forehead in response. They walked upstairs and out of the club almost in complete silence. Only Oliver’s heavy breaths were to be heard.

It wasn’t until they had reached their car that Oliver spoke, “Despite from what they made me do to you, I would love to kick those drug dealers’ asses for taking the one night that we could have used to have a lot of sex away from us with this crap. I mean… it’s been twenty days.”

“And I thought I was the only one keeping count.” Felicity chuckled and pressed a kiss to the knuckles of his hand. “Don’t worry. We will find a time and place soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For everyone who was missing Emmy - she'll be back in the next chapter!


	96. A special Halloween

 “You look like a stripper.”

“I’ll give that compliment right back to you.”

“That wasn’t exactly meant as a compliment.”

“Hey, you’re the one who bought this for me. I was against dressing up at all.”

“I didn’t think it would look like _that_ ,” Felicity responded, gesturing up and down Oliver’s body. The dark blue of the policeman uniform brought out the intense blue color of his eyes. The dress shirt fit like a second skin, accentuating all the strong muscles of his chest, shoulders and arms.  “You do look like a stripper.”

“No, mommy!” Emmy yelled when she was running into her parents’ bedroom, dressed as a pink bat. “Daddy’s a policeman. Just like grandpa.”

“Wow, I don’t know the last time I felt like I was growing old so quickly,” Oliver muttered before he lifted Emmy from the floor and held her with his arms stretched out in front of him. Curse upon that man’s ridiculous strength! “You look fabulous, sweetie! Did you pick the costume yourself?”

Emmy nodded proudly. “Mommy helped a little.”

“Only a little,” Felicity said, winking at her daughter. “What do you say about mommy’s costume?”

“You’re a criminal,” Emmy said, looking up and down her mother’s dress with the black and white straps, before she looked at her dad. “Do you arrest mommy?”

“I might. I have handcuffs to do so,” Oliver explained, shortly shooting a gaze towards Felicity that made a jolt of arousal go right to her core. “Hey, you want to see Tommy’s costume? I already changed him. He’s in his crib.”

Immediately Emmy struggled against her father’s hold until he let her down on the floor and as soon as her toes made contact with the carpet, she ran out of the room and towards the nursery. The only thing that had made her more excited for Halloween than the sweets and the opportunity to dress up had been that her baby brother would dress up for the first time. And of course she had planned out what Tommy was going to wear before she had decided on a costume for herself. Since she was still calling Tommy Nemo from time to time, the name she would have picked for her baby brother if Oliver and Felicity hadn’t put in a veto, her little brother should dress up as Nemo tonight. Oliver had gotten the costume only yesterday and Felicity hoped it would look as cute as it had on the pictures.

She was already turning to follow Emmy and see what Tommy looked like as Nemo when Oliver hastily stepped behind her and pressed his chest to her back. His arms wrapped around her waist and his fingers entwined on her stomach. Before Felicity could ask what he was doing, Oliver lowered his lips to the side of Felicity’s neck and caressed her skin. His lips were pressed to the parts of her skin where red marks had reminded them of how Oliver had held her in a tight choke hold when he had been drugged and gone off the rails a week ago, trying to erase that memory from both of their minds.

Felicity didn’t say anything. She let Oliver caress the parts of her he had hurt against his will last week and let him put his nose to her pulse point, so he could breathe in the scent of her skin and assure himself that she was alright and she was still here with him. She knew he just needed those few seconds.

“I was thinking maybe we could use the handcuffs later tonight when the kids are in bed,” Oliver whispered into her ear. “We could have some fun further exploring our roles.”

“Oh, don’t tease me like that,” Felicity groaned, sinking back against him and resting her head on his shoulder. “It’s been so long.”

“Maybe tonight we will find the time to-“

“Daddy!”

“Hold that thought,” Felicity whispered, pressing a short kiss to the underside of her husband’s jaw. “Maybe we’re lucky and the kids sleep for most of the night. Tommy has become so much calmer this week.”

“Hopefully,” Oliver replied, kissing the side of her neck once more, before he took her hand and lead her to the nursery.

Emmy had climbed into the crib to her brother and was examining his costume, a costume that didn’t look like clownfish Nemo at all. It was actually a shark costume with Tommy’s smiling face sneaking out from between the jaws full of teeth. Felicity mimicked her daughter’s face and looked at Oliver.

“What is that?”

“It’s Tommy’s costume,” Oliver replied, massaging the back of his neck uncomfortably when Felicity cocked her head at him.

“It’s the wrong one, daddy!” Emmy told him, tickling the underside of Tommy’s naked feet. The little boy giggle loudly in response and kicked his feet at his sister. “That’s not Nemo!”

“She is right,” Felicity agreed with her daughter. “That is so not Nemo.”

“Nemo was out of stock,” Oliver replied. “I went with the costume closest.”

“But it’s the wrong one, daddy!” Emmy repeated.

Felicity chuckled, lowered her head to press a kiss to Emmy’s hair and lifted Tommy from the crib. “Well, Emmy, that is what happens when you let men take care of clothes. Next year we will make sure Tommy get’s the right costume, alright?”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh and let Oliver lift her out of Tommy’s crib and into his arms.

The four of them made themselves comfortable in the living room. Tommy way lying on a blanket on the floor, his chest propped up onto his forearms. Felicity was kneeling next to him, building little towers with toy blocks that Tommy destroyed with a happy screech that infected Felicity each and every time.

Emmy and Oliver were sitting at the window, looking outside to check when finally the first people would come by for trick or treat. Whenever there was a glimpse of light from a passing car or anything, the little girl sat up more straightly and every time her shoulders dropped when she was again disappointed because there weren’t any dressed up kids coming. Oliver ensured her that it was still early and it was probably just taking some more time until someone would come. Every now and then he looked over to Felicity, smiled about the happy sounds of his son and licked his lips at the sight of how the hem of Felicity’s dress was riding up higher and higher on her thigh with each movement.

“How much longer, daddy?” Emmy asked after he shoulders had dropped for the umpteenth time this evening.

Oliver sighed. “Just a little.”

 

 

Two hours later – Tommy was already sleeping in his crib – still nobody had come by for trick or treat. Emmy was completely discouraged by now. Sitting on the floor with the bowl of sweets between her spread legs, she sat there and looked down sadly. There weren’t much children in the neighborhood and the few there were were probably too old or too young for trick or treat. They should have thought about that before. Now Emmy was sad and nothing Oliver or Felicity could say comforted her.

“I’m tired,” Emmy said, getting up from the floor and taking off the wings of her costume. She let them drop to the floor carelessly and headed towards the stairs.

“How about we watch a movie?” Oliver suggested. “Mommy, you and I cuddle on the couch, eat lot of ice cream and watch movies all night long?”

“No,” Emmy said. “Mommy, you help me change?”

“Sure,” Felicity said with a sigh and got up from the couch to follow her daughter upstairs, but Oliver was already at her side.

“Keep her from undressing,” he whispered to her and handed her the wings Emmy had left on the floor. “We will get visitors.”

“What do you-?” Felicity asked, but Oliver was already rushing to the kitchen.

Felicity hurried upstairs to follow her daughter. The little girl was already working on taking off her pantyhose, still looking so very sad.

“Sorry, the evening wasn’t as much fun,” Felicity said, crouching down in front of her daughter and putting her hands to Emmy’s to stop her from taking off the pantyhose. “But your costume looks really nice. Maybe you want to sleep in it?”

Emmy shook her head and it almost broke Felicity’s heart. The toddler had been so excited for this night that the disappointment was only worse now. And Felicity had no idea how she could keep her daughter from changing out of the clothes that reminded her of how boring the evening had ended up to be although having been so promising before.

“How about-“ Felicity started without knowing what exactly to say when luckily the doorbell rang. With wide eyes and a bright smile she looked at her daughter. “Oh my god, maybe someone is coming after all!”

“My wings! Mommy, my wings!” Emmy yelled excitedly, getting back into the pantyhose.

Felicity helped her to put the wings back on and immediately the toddler ran back upstairs. Felicity followed hastily to see Oliver meeting Emmy at the door and telling her that he had no idea who was visiting them. He winked up and Felicity when he opened the door with Emmy gripping his hand tightly to calm her excitement. Felicity sat down in the middle of the stairs where she could watch what was happening.

When the door opened, they all could see a red costumed figure crouching on the doorstep and while Oliver kneeled down next to Emmy and smiled at her brightly, the little girl snuggled her tiny body as close to her father’s chest as possible and held onto his forearm for to assure himself he was still there.

“Hi, Emmy.”

“Daddy, it’s Flash. He knows my name,” Emmy whispered into Oliver’s ear and Felicity put her hand in front of her lips to keep herself from saying anything.

“I can see,” Oliver replied.

“Are you here for trick or treat?” Emmy asked shyly, snuggling her head to Oliver’s shoulder shyly in a try to hide herself partly. Felicity had never seen Emmy that shy about anything but the first meeting with Tommy. She had been so afraid because he had been so small and she hadn’t wanted to hurt him.

“That is why I came here,” Barry said, his voice disguised. “But I think you should actually keep most of the sweets for yourself. I’d be happy about a chocolate bar, though. You know, I came all the way from Central City, so a little candy for my way back would be nice.”

“I’ll get the bowl with the candy,” Oliver told her and let go of Emmy’s hand.

She held onto the door instead and watched the masked man in front of her carefully. Emmy had always had a weakness for the local heroes, including the Flash. When Oliver came back and kneeled next to her again, Emmy took one of the chocolate bars and shyly put it into the Flash’s open hand. He thanked her, but Emmy hastily snuggled back into Oliver’s side and whispered something into his ear, Felicity couldn’t hear.

“You have to ask him, sweetie,” Oliver replied with a smile.

But instead of repeating her question loudly, Emmy hid her face against his father’s shoulder and giggled nervously. Barry used the opportunity to shoot a glance towards Felicity and wink at her and she mouthed a not audible ‘thank you’ in his direction.

“You can ask me anything,” Barry encouraged Emmy. “What do you want, sweetheart?”

“Kiss you,” Emmy replied so silently it was barely audible.

“Wow!” Barry made and for a short moment he actually forgot to change his voice with the body vibration, but Emmy seemed to be too embarrassed about her question to realize. “But… of course.”

Barry waited patiently while Emmeline gripped Oliver’s forefinger and hesitatingly stepped a little closer to the masked hero on their doorstep. His lips made contact with his cheek only shortly before she hastily moved back into her father’s arm.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, little girl,” Barry told. “I have to go back now and kick a few as- butts. Butts. Of course I mean butts. Have a nice night.”

With a last wink towards Felicity Barry ran, leaving a red and orange flash behind him. As soon as the door fell shut, the little girl screeched, “The Flash! Daddy, the Flash! Mommy, the Flash was here!”

“I’ve seen,” Felicity said and chuckled. Slowly she approached her husband and daughter. Stroking her hand over Emmy’s hair, she asked, “So is the Flash your new favorite hero now?”

Oliver shot her his typical how-dare-you-glare before he looked back at Emmeline, who to his obvious disappointment nodded.

“Yes!” she said. “My new favorite!”

“What about the Arrow?” Oliver asked. “You like him. Because he is green and he is tall and muscular just like daddy.”

“He’s too tall and too muscular. And the Flash came here! I want to marry him!”

“Who? The Flash?!”

Emmy nodded. “Mommy, can I marry him?”

“No, you’re going to marry daddy,” Oliver replied before Felicity got the chance to.

“Mommy’s married to you,” Emmy replied.

“I’ll divorce her,” Oliver suggested, earning him an ungentle punch against his shoulder from Felicity. “Fine! No marrying daddy! So you’ll marry the Arrow. He is cool.”

Emmy shook her head. “No. I’m marrying the Flash and-“

Before she got to speak that sentence to an end, the doorbell rang again. Oliver got up from his kneeling position on the floor and muttered under his breath, “First he kisses my wife, now my daughter wants to marry him… I might have to shoot a few more arrows at him next time I see him.”

Felicity slapped his chest lightly. Oliver caught her hand and lifted it to his lips, pressing a kiss to the palm. Then he looked at Emmy. “Ready for the next guest?”

 

 

Four heroes later – Speedy and Arsenal, Black Canary and finally Spartan had all showed up to surprise little Emmy – Felicity sat at the edge of her daughter’s bed and stroked over her hair. The toddler looked at her mother with tired but wide eyes. She had been so astonished by the special guests that had shown up she had barley been able to say a word. When Laurel had winked at her for goodbye, she had tried to wink back, but her whole face had been moving, so Oliver and Felicity had had trouble to keep their laughter at bay.

“What’s going on, sweetheart?” Felicity asked, adjusting the blanket around her daughter. Both of them were still dressed in their costumes. Emmy had insisted on sleeping in it like her mom had proposed to her earlier this night and Felicity was still hoping for Oliver to rip the dress off of her and take her right against the wall of-

“Mommy?” Emmy called for Felicity’s attention, playfully tugging at her mother’s blonde curls.

“Yes, sweetie?”

“You made sounds.”

“What sounds?” Felicity asked. When Emmy started making whiny, needy sounds, Felicity felt her cheeks heating up with a blush and hastily said, “I was just… wondering why you are still not sleeping. It was a big day today, hm?”

Emmy nodded in agreement and Felicity smiled, waiting for her toddler to tell her what was wrong because clearly she wasn’t as happy about her special guests as she had been before.

“Arrow didn’t come,” she said with small voice.

“Well, maybe he had to save the city,” Felicity replied with a smile. “When all other heroes come to see you, there has to be one to save the city.”

“Right,” Emmy said, clearly not completely satisfied with her mother’s answer.

So Felicity leaned down and kissed her daughter’s forehead before she whispered into her ear, “Maybe one day you will meet him.”

“You think?”

“I think everything is possible,” Felicity replied with a wink and kissed both of her daughter’s cheeks. “And now sleep, okay?”

“Okay.”

While Felicity was walking to the door to Emmy’s room behind her, the little girl turned onto her side and closed her eyes. She hadn’t admitted it before and if she was asked now, she would definitely lie about it, but she was so terribly tired she was half-asleep even before her mother had stepped out of the room and left the door ajar. Her lids were falling shut. Her thoughts were drifting away as her body became heavier with each passing second.

She was already far, far away in her mind when a quiet tapping at the window pulled her out of whatever world she had built in her dreams. She was so disorientated that it took her a moment and a second tapping at the window until she could find the source of the noise. Her eyes widened and she rubbed them in disbelief when she saw her old favorite hero crouching on the small windowsill outside.

Slowly Emmy got out of bed, keeping a careful distance to the window and the dark figure in front of it. She wasn’t exactly scared because why should she be scared of the Arrow, Starling City’s own hero? But her mommy and daddy, especially her daddy, always told her to be careful because people could look nice and seem nice, but they weren’t always nice.

“Hi, Emmy,” she heard the Arrow say through the window, his voice sounding just as strange as the ones of the other heroes she had met tonight. “Did you have a nice evening?”

Emmy nodded, feeling a loss of words. She wished her mommy or daddy were here to hold her hand. Then maybe they could open the window and let him in.

“Sorry, I couldn’t come by sooner,” the Arrow told her. His voice was very quiet from behind the window, but she knew that if she opened, she would get into trouble with mommy and daddy later. So she stayed where she stood in the middle of the room and just watched him while he spoke. “Did my friends come by? I asked them to go see you.”

Emmy nodded again and when the Arrow smiled at her, she smiled back shyly and yawned.

“I think it’s time for bed,” the Arrow told her. “Go lie down and sleep. I’ll watch over you tonight.”

Emmy nodded once more and went over to the bed. She curled herself together under the blanket and shot a last glance to the Arrow. Only when he winked at her and told her to close her eyes, she did so and felt sleep soon pulling at her consciousness.

Oliver waited outside until he was halfway sure that Emmy had fallen asleep. Only then did he climb further along the front of his house and slid through an open window. When he saw Felicity lying on the bed, still wearing her costume, with her head propped up onto her hand, he smirked.

“Did she open the window?” Felicity asked with her intense gaze on his face.

“Nope.”

“God, I love this kid!” she said. “We have so nailed this whole sensitize-your-child-for-dangers-even-in-early-age-thing.”

“We did.”

“Do you think he recognized you or any of the others?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Even if she did, she is not even three years old. It’s not like people will believe her, especially when it’s a story about Halloween.”

“That’s true.”

“Yes, it is.”

Felicity noticed the roughness of his voice and licked her lips slowly while moving her hand from her hip down her upper thigh and back up again, never taking her eyes off of him. She enjoyed the way his eyes grew darker with lust.

“So… Arrow…” Felicity said, emphasizing every sound of his codename. “What brings you here tonight?”

Oliver smirked under his hood and slowly made his way to the bed. He slid onto the bed with her, rolling her around, so her back was pressed into the mattress and he was resting between her thighs.

“You, Mrs. Queen, have failed this city.”

With a growl he lowered his lips to hers and stole a searing hot kiss from her. Felicity responded to it too gladly. After all this time that the kids and their jobs and god knew what else had kept them apart, each of Oliver’s touches set her skin on fire and with each the thrusts of his clothed hips against hers she made the same needy noises she had made when she had only thought about sex earlier while taking Emmy to bed. Oliver pushed the hem of her dress up her thighs to her waist before he impatiently ripped it into two, just like Felicity had imagined.

His lips took a down path. He kissed, licked and nibbled at her skin, kissing the sensitive area around her breasts before he dipped his tongue into her belly button. Felicity pushed the hood down and clawed her hands into his short hands, keeping his head against her skin while simultaneously arching against them. She moaned silently and-

Oliver rolled off of her and only grumbled the name of their daughter before he disappeared into the bathroom and closed the door behind. Felicity had barely time to pull the blanket higher before the door to the hallway was opened and their little toddler came running in. She ran right to the bed and climbed in. She crawled towards where her mother was lying and straddled her thighs.

“Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” she yelled excitedly, still keeping her voice in a whisper to not wake her baby brother who was sleeping in the room next door. “Mommy, he was there!”

“Who was there?” Felicity asked, trying to keep her smile from showing on her face.

“Arrow! He came!”

“Wow, that’s a surprise!” Felicity gasped. “What was he like?”

“Green!”

Felicity chuckled and when the door to the bathroom opened and Oliver stepped out in pajama pants, she caught the t-shirt he threw into her direction just in time before it would have landed in her face. Emmy jumped up and right into her dad’s arms, excitedly telling him about what had happened while Felicity put on Oliver’s shirt.

“That sounds exciting,” Oliver said. “So the Arrow is your favorite hero now again?”

“Yes!”

Emmy smiled happily and so did Oliver. Felicity rolled her eyes at that, but kept watching her daughter and her husband.

“You had a really exciting night, right?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed happily.

“So now it’s time for bed, okay?”

“Okay!” Emmy said and as soon as Oliver sat her down on the bed, she was crawling towards Felicity and snuggling up to her.

“No, no, no,” Oliver said hastily. “Your own bed, Emmy.”

“Okay, daddy,” Emmy mumbled, already asleep.

“I’ll carry her back,” Oliver suggested and tried to lift Emmy into his arms, but her hands gripped Felicity’s shirt and she made a whiny sound. Oliver groaned before he looked at Felicity. “Do something!”

“What shall I do?”

“Wake her!”

“Why don’t you wake her?”

“I can’t! Look at this cute, little human-being! How am I supposed to wake her up?” he asked with whispered voice. “You have to do it, so we can have a lot of hot, passionate sex tonight.”

Felicity looked down at her daughter. She was so cute in her pink bat costume. Her face was so peaceful and she was sleeping so soundly. God, Felicity wanted to have sex, but she just couldn’t get herself to wake her daughter.

“If we wake her, she will start crying and then Tommy will start crying and then we won’t even get sleep tonight,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver growled, but, admitting defeat, he let himself drop onto the bed and snuggled up to Emmy’s other side, pressing his chest against her back and wrapping his arm around Felicity’s waist.

“Just for the record,” he whispered, “next time we just let her go to bed early and disappointedly without mobilizing all our social contacts to make her happy. And without sabotaging our own sex life.”

Felicity chuckled. “And you can do that? Let her go to bed disappointedly and sadly, so she can cry herself to sleep and-“

“Okay, stop!” Oliver interrupted her with a quiet groan and sighed. “We’re screwed.”

“Hopefully one day soon we will be screwed by each other,” Felicity suggested, making Oliver groan again. She reached her hand out to caress his cheek and scratched his stubble with her fingertips. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he replied. “And now we will sleep, so we can try and use whatever opportunity is possibly given to us tomorrow to get some private time and do what we were stopped with tonight.”

“Good plan,” Felicity said with a nod and leaned over to kiss Oliver shortly over the head of their daughter. His lips chased after hers until he remembered their daughter with a grumble from deep inside of his chest and rested his head back on the pillow next to her. “Night, Oliver.”

“Night, Felicity.”

“Night,” Emmy mumbled, snuggling closer to Felicity.

Oliver and Felicity chuckled before they said in chorus, “Night, sweetheart.”


	97. A day alone with the kids

While he was leaning against the kitchen counter and drinking the orange juice he had pressed out himself, Oliver watched Emmy and Sara kneeling on the floor and leaning over little Tommy who let himself be amused by the girls. It had never felt more appropriate that Felicity and he had decided on calling their little boy Tommy because just like Oliver’s deceased best friend his son charmed all the ladies. At least as long as he wasn’t crying which luckily had become less in the last weeks.

This was his future, Oliver thought with a smile. In three weeks he was officially giving his position at Queen Incorporated over to Felicity and he was going to be a stay-at-home-dad. Today was the first time they were trying this new setting. While Felicity was working at Queen Inc. and taking care that the change of leadership would be accomplished smoothly, Oliver was taking care of their kids.

Sara Diggle had spontaneously joined them this morning. Lyla’s sister was in the hospital after an accident and both, Lyla and John, were there now, waiting for her to come out of surgery. And since daycare was closed because of some epidemic, Lyla had dropped Sara here this morning and John would pick her up after lunch. But Oliver wouldn’t mind even if his goddaughter way staying the whole day or even until tomorrow. Emmy loved having Sara around and so did he.

“Uncle Oliver?” Sara asked, looking at her favorite uncle. “Emmy and I have a question.”

With a smile on his lips Oliver approached the kids and kneeled down next to the girls. He lowered his lips to his son’s forehead, pressing a gentle kiss to the soft skin. Tommy giggled delightedly and moved his arms and legs wildly. Oliver smiled at the little boy for a short moment before he looked at his daughter and his goddaughter.

“What’s the question?” he asked.

Sara looked at Emmy. “You ask him.”

Emmy had a deep frown on her forehead. She looked at Oliver in concentration before she lowered her gaze to her baby brother. Oliver didn’t miss how the frown on her forehead deepened and perked his eyebrow in question. When Emmy looked back at him, though, he put on an encouraging smile.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, sweetheart?”

“Why does Tommy look like Uncle Ray?”

“He doesn’t look like Ray,” Oliver’s answer came immediately.

“He does,” Sara and Emmy answered in chorus.

“He doesn’t,” Oliver insisted.

“He’s got dark hair,” Sara said, gently tugging at a strand of Tommy’s short hair. The little boy laughed.

“Just like Uncle Ray,” Emmy added.

Oliver opened his mouth to object again, but didn’t know what to say. He looked down at his son, who laughed loudly. He had been pretty grumpy in his first weeks and he still was like that pretty often, especially during the late hours of the evening and in the night. During the day he had turned into a little sweetheart, just like ray of sun-

He silently cursed his mind for going there. Tommy was no _ray_ of sunshine. He was a sweetheart during the day just like his mother. And he charmed the lady like his deceased name twin had done and like Oliver, Tommy’s father, himself had done in his youth. Ray had absolutely nothing to do with Tommy.

“Did he get the dark hair from Uncle Ray, Uncle Oliver?” Sara asked, cocking her hair.

“Did he, daddy?”

Why was Emmy asking him that? His little darling of a daughter had adapted his not too fond feelings for Ray. She didn’t like him much and she liked him even less when Oliver was around because she could feel that Ray wasn’t exactly her daddy’s best friend and hence assumed that there was a good reason for that. Or at least a better reason than her father’s inability to shut out the thoughts that maybe Ray would be the better man for…

No, he told himself in his mind. That topic had been exhausted to the end. As many similarities there were between Ray and Felicity, Felicity loved him and only him. She had chosen him over Ray and she had built a family with him and not Ray.  

Oliver cleared his throat before he answered calmly, “No, he didn’t. He got that hair from mommy.”

“Aunt Felicity doesn’t have dark hair,” Sara answered immediately.

“She doesn’t, daddy,” Emmy agreed with her friend.

“You’re mommy is changing the color of her hair,” Oliver explained. “She prefers to have blonde hair, so she tells her hairdresser to make it blonde instead of dark.”

The two girls frowned and exchanged a quick gaze before Sara cocked her head and crossed her arms in front of her chest, “Do you have proof?”

If the way she stood there and asked him this wasn’t enough proof that she was John’s and Lyla’s child, what else was?

Oliver turned his head, looking around. There were only few photos of Felicity when she was younger and none of them were placed in their living room. There was a photo of Oliver’s parents with Thea and him from only few days before Oliver and his father had started their trip to hell. He had asked Felicity if she wouldn’t like an old photo of her and her mother somewhere in their home, too, but she had rather picked a photo they had taken during Donna’s first visit in Starling City.

So instead of searching for the photos Oliver just lifted Tommy from the floor and held him next to him, so the baby’s cheek was right next to his own, giving the little girls a good comparison of the two faces.

“See?” he asked. “He has my blue eyes. And we have the same jaw. Tommy is the perfect mix of Felicity and me. No Ray in there at all.”

Sara and Emmy exchanged a doubting gaze, but eventually the older girl shrugged her shoulders and said, “Come on, Emmy. We go play with your dolls.”

While the two of them were leaving, Oliver rested Tommy against his chest and got up from the floor. He held his son in front of him for a short moment, looking him up and down. Nope, there was definitely nothing of Ray Plamer in his boy. As different as he was from his sister, he was a just as perfect mixture of both his parents as Emmy was.

“Maybe mommy knows,” Oliver heard Emmy tell Sara while they were walking upstairs.

“Aunt Felicity knows. She’s smart,” Sara agreed. “We ask her about Tommy and Uncle Ray.”

Oliver shook his head. Not even halfway through the day alone with the kids and his paternity was already being doubted. Not what was a great start!

 

 

Silently closing the door behind him, Oliver let out a sigh of relief. After almost an hour of rocking the little boy in his arms and singing whatever had come into his mind to him with whispered voice Tommy had finally fallen asleep. Oliver had thought it would be easier to put him to bed for his nap since the little boy’s eyes had already fallen asleep while he had drunken the bottle of milk. But of course being tired and actually wanting to sleep were two different things.

Anyway, at least now he was asleep, so Oliver could go and look where Emmy was. After John had picked up Sara, Oliver had promised his daughter to play with her as soon as Tommy was asleep.

He walked down the hallway to Emmy’s room, but one look into the room was enough to tell him that the little girl wasn’t there. So Oliver turned around on his heels and headed towards the stairs, thinking that his daughter had probably gone downstairs to play with her toddler laptop or anything. When he saw that the door to his and Felicity’s room was open, though, he stopped to take a look into the room. It was empty and seemingly undisturbed which was unusual if Emmy had been here. Wherever she went, chaos followed.

“Emmy?” he called out quietly and stepped into the room.

“Here!” she called back from behind the closed door to the clothing room.

Of course she was in the clothing room, Oliver thought to himself and crossed the room towards the door. Emmy loved dressing up. Since Halloween last week she had used whatever clothes she had been able to get a hold on to play dress up with – his leather jacket to play rockstar, Thea’s overknee boots to play… whatever she had been playing, a red blanket to use as a cape and god knew what else.

He opened the door to the clothing room, expecting to find Emmy playing in a pool of her mother’s dresses, trying to figure out which of the items on the floor fitted best to the ones she was already wearing, but reality only partly matched with his suggestions. Emmy was indeed wearing one of her mother’s dresses. She had tried to do up her hair in a high ponytail, but most of the short hair had fallen out already if she had been able to do it up at all. She had set askew Felicity’s loaner glasses on her way too little face for the optical aid and her face just as some of the clothes on the floor were smeared with Felicity’s favorite pink lipstick.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Oliver asked, sitting down cross-legged on the floor next to her and pulling Emmy from the pile of clothes into his arms.

“Do I look like mommy?” she asked instead of answering.

“If mommy wouldn’t be a little bit taller than you, I would have thought it was her standing in front of me.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Oliver answered seriously, nodding his head. “But why are you dressing up like mommy?”

“I miss her.”

“Me, too.” Oliver sighed. “But mommy’s coming back before dinner. We talked about that, remember? Mommy is going to take daddy’s place in the company and daddy is staying home with Tommy and you. Today we just try it this way and in a few weeks we will start doing it like this every day.”

“Every day?” Emmy asked and Oliver nodded.

“That means more daddy-Emmy-time,” he said with a wink.

“I know. Still miss mommy.”

“How about we go to your room and play family? You are playing mommy and I am your husband?”

“Yes!”

Emmy nodded excitedly and while she was already running outside and to her room, Oliver took a mental note to not forget cleaning up the mess Emmy had made before Felicity was back. He wanted to do the whole stay-at-home-dad-thing right and that included cleaning up the mess the children had made.

When he stepped into Emmy’s room, she was already setting up everything for their game. She adjusted Felicity’s loaner glasses on her nose and put the toddler laptop on the small desk, when she sat down in front of the laptop and started to randomly push a few keys on the keyboard, she looked more like Felicity than ever.

“So, honey, what are you working on?” Oliver asked, crouching down next to his daughter and looking over her shoulder onto the switched off screen of the laptop.

“Work,” Emmy just responded. “Important work.”

“Can you explain it to me, hon? Maybe I can-“

“Don’t touch it!” she interrupted him when he reached out his hand to adjust the screen like he wanted to get a better look, and she slapped his fingers away. “You only break it!”

Wow! She really nailed that whole playing-Felicity-thing!

“Okay, so I will take care of Tommy, okay?” Oliver suggested, looking for Emmy’s doll to busy himself with while Emmy was doing her important work.

“But first kiss, hon,” Emmy said.

She turned around on her chair and reached her arms out for her daddy. Oliver moved his face in between her little hands and her fingers moved through his stubble like Felicity’s always did when he leaned in for a kiss. When Emmy’s open lips – she always kissed Felicity and him with open lips because when mommy and daddy kissed each other like that, she wanted to kiss them like that, too – met his closed ones, he chuckled against her lips quietly. When Oliver pulled back a little, he brushed his nose against hers and Emmy giggled.

When he smiled back at her, she asked, “Do we make a baby now?”

For the second time today he was speechless because of his not even three years old daughter. First she thought Ray was Tommy’s father and now she wanted to make a baby with him. What was she thinking?

“Sorry, baby,” Oliver said hastily, pressing a short kiss to the tip of Emmy’s nose. “Daddy needs to go downstairs and… clean the kitchen. I have to clean the kitchen. I didn’t get around doing that after lunch because I put Tommy to bed. Can you… play here on your own?”

Emmy nodded. “Okay.”

Oliver hastily got up before Emmy could change her mind and hurried downstairs. He grabbed the phone from the kitchen counter and dialed Felicity’s number. She picked up before the third free line signal had ended.

“How’s your day going?” she asked.

“Terrible,” he answered honestly. “I am not sure I can do this.”

“Do what?”

“Be a dad.”

Felicity chuckled. “You’ve been a dad for years now, Oliver, and a pretty amazing one… a pretty and amazing one actually. I mean you-“

“Felicity, I am being serious here,” he interrupted her and sighed, moving his hand over his face roughly. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“What happened?” Felicity asked gently. “These unnecessary self-doubts are certainly not coming from nothing.”

“First Emmy and Sara asked me why Tommy looked like Ray and kind of implied that maybe he is his father-“

“He does look like Ray a lot.”

“He does not,” Oliver said between gritted teeth. “Anyway, now she asked me if were making a baby.”

“We?”

“We as in Emmy and me.”

Felicity chuckled. “She is adorable, isn’t she?”

“Felicity, she asked me-“

“Let me guess,” Felicity interrupted him, “you were playing family with her.”

“Yes,” Oliver answered, “but-“

“She was mommy and you were daddy?”

“Yes, but-“

“Oliver, when mommies and daddies love each other, they are eventually making babies. Emmy was playing a game.”

“Yes, but-“

“Oliver,” Felicity said firmly, “this is not the first time you’re alone with the kids. You’ve done this before and you had always got it handled. Yes, you’re going to be the stay-at-home-parent now and hence you have to be a little more responsible than you are when the kids are having their occasional crazy weekend with dad, but you can do this. You have done it multiple times before.”

Oliver took in a deep breath and released it after a short second. Felicity was right. Of course she was. She always was.

“Thanks,” he said with another sigh. “I think I just… overreacted.”

“Don’t worry. I had a mini freak-out here, too.”

“What happened?”

“I thought that maybe I might not be good at this.”

“You will be great.”

“I know, but for a short moment I thought I might suck.”

Oliver already opened his mouth to reply when Felicity’s last word echoed through his mind again and again. He released a low grumble from somewhere deep in his chest and tightened his hold on the phone.

“Bad choice of words,” Felicity admitted. “As soon as the word had crossed my lips, I knew it was the worst thing to say given that we are terribly undersexed. Thirty-eight days. The only times we hadn’t sex for that long has been after the birth of our two little darlings and during my depression.”

“I know.”

“It feels like we are never going to have sex again.”

“I know.”

“And I have to go, so there isn’t even time for sexting.”

“Sexting wouldn’t have been satisfying anyway.”

“Yeah… I know… So… Have fun with the kids.”

“Have fun at work.”

“Maybe tonight we can have fun with each other.”

“You think so?”

“Not really. But at least there is still hope.”

Oliver chuckled. “I love you.”

“Love you, too. Bye.”


	98. Family bed

“Is Tommy asleep?”

“I think so.”

“He was crying a lot again tonight.”

“He was,” Felicity replied with a sigh, letting herself drop onto the bed with her back to the mattress. She stared at the ceiling. “You know, one hour ago I was sure that he was going to fall asleep easily, but as soon as I lay him down in his crib, he started crying all over again. How come that even when he is so tired, he still cries like crazy? Besides, I feel like it is getting worse again which is a shame, given that he has been getting better lately. I was hoping it would get less exhausting to put him to bed now.”

“It really is exhausting, isn’t it?”

“It is.”

“Completely tiring you out, right?”

Felicity smirked shortly and turned around onto her side, so she was facing Oliver. She slid a little closer to him and mimicked his position with her head propped up onto her hand. She tried to keep her facial expression serious, but she was almost sure that the smirk snuck it way through onto her face when she whispered, “Oliver, after forty-four days without it I think I would wake up from a coma for sex.”

With that being said Felicity sat up and moved over Oliver, so she was straddling him. She didn’t waste a second and instead immediately teased him by running her hands up his naked chest and then leaned down. When their lips met in a heated kiss, Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her down against him.

“Felicity,” he groaned against her lips when she thrust her hips against his and she intended to chuckle against his lips in response, but it ended in a long moan when Oliver thrust his hips upward into hers the next moment.

Forty-four days were a long time to go without sex for them. They were young and even after almost four years of marriage they were as crazy about each other as they had been in the beginning, so going without sex for even just a week was more of an unusual thing for them. But with two little kids, one more exhausting than the other, there just hadn’t been enough time or energy to spend enjoying each other. But tonight might be their night.

When she turned her head, breaking the kiss for some urgently needed air, Oliver let his lips move down over her chin and jaw to her neck, sucking her pulse point. Felicity purred like a kitten and snuggled closer to Oliver, trying to get more friction from their hips thrusting against each other’s.

“Oliver,” she moaned, bending her head back to give him more access to her neck.

Oliver moved his hands underneath the fabric of her shirt and stroked the tips of his finger along her spine gently, making Felicity grind against him more desperately. She could feel his cock hardening in his pants and with a particularly hard thrust down into his lap, Oliver’s head dropped back onto the pillow with a hiss.

“You’re mean,” he grumbled.

“Awww! And I was just going to tell you that I think we should skip the whole teasing and go right at it.”

“I like the sound of that,” Oliver replied.

Oliver sat up while Felicity was leaning down, so their lips met in the middle. He put his hands to Felicity’s hips and pulled her closer before he grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head. He pressed his lips to her chest right above her heart and Felicity sighed at the feeling of that. She moved her hands to-

“No!” they groaned in unison when they heard Tommy’s cries over the baby alarm.

Tommy just really hated sleeping. From the depth of his heart. The nap was already bad, but sleeping at night was a small catastrophe.  First he refused to fall asleep and once he had fallen asleep, it didn’t take long until he woke up and started crying again. And there were only few to no things that helped him calm down.

“What if we just let him cry?” Oliver asked, looking up at Felicity.

“When we let him cry, Emmy is going to wake up. It is not going to help us.”

Oliver sighed and let his upper body fall back against the mattress. Felicity leaned down and pressed a kiss to his Bratva-tattoo.

“I’ll go and take care of him.”

“No,” Oliver said and rolled them around, so he was hovering over Felicity. He brushed his lips against hers shortly. “I’ll do that. Wait here and think of me.”

“Nothing’s easier than that,” Felicity replied with a low chuckle.

Oliver brushed his lips against hers once more before he climbed out of bed and strolled to the nursery. Tommy was lying in bed, crying loudly.

“Hey, what’s wrong, buddy?” Oliver asked with whispered voice and lifted his son from the crib and into his arms, cradling him against his naked chest. He sat down in the rocking chair and continued to whisper, “You have to be tired. You’ve been smiling and laughing and moving all day. You have to be tired. And when you’re tired, sleeping helps you.”

But of course Tommy with his barely five months of age didn’t understand. He just kept crying as loudly as before. Even when Oliver rubbed his back which was usually the only thing that could get the little man to fall back asleep, it didn’t seem to help tonight.

“You know, we often talked about my friend Tommy, the one you got your name from?” Oliver asked, resting his cheek against Tommy’s head without stopping to rub his back and rock the chair back and forth slowly. “When daddy wanted to have nights with pretty ladies, he was my wingman. That means that he supported me and had my back. He took care that nothing got in the way, you know? So daddy could have fun. I think that is something I should definitely teach you one day because today and the forty-three days before for that matter daddy wanted to have a little fun with mommy and you totally got in my way of that. Admittedly, you weren’t the only obstacle on all the days, but… you were a major part of it.”

When Tommy released a sound that was definitely not a cry, Oliver looked down at his son to see him smiling brightly.

“Hey, you’re not supposed to think that is funny,” he told him with an own grin on his face. “You’re ruining mommy’s and daddy’s sex life.”

Again Tommy only giggled.

“Daddy?”

Oliver looked up and found Emmy standing in the open door. She rubbed her right eye with her fist and looked at him sleepily.

“Hey, hon,” Oliver whispered. “Did Tommy wake you?”

Emmy nodded, strolled towards him and climbed on his lap. She put a hand to Tommy’s tummy, the other to Oliver’s arm under Tommy’s head and kissed her little brother’s forehead gently. The boy smiled delightedly.

“I guess nobody can sleep when he is crying, hm?” Oliver asked.

“Mommy can,” Emmy answered. “She’s sleeping.”

Felicity was sleeping. Of course she was sleeping. It was past midnight and she had had an exhausting day with the kids. And actually Oliver should be sleeping, too, because he had a meeting early in the morning tomorrow and for that he needed to be well-rested or at least as well-rested as possible for him.

He looked down at Tommy. He was slowly falling asleep, but Oliver knew that it would only take a few minutes for him alone in the crib to wake up and start crying again.

“I think Tommy will sleep in mommy’s and my bed tonight again,” Oliver said with a sigh and looked at Emmy. “What about you?”

“Me, too?”

“If you want to.”

“Yes!”

Oliver adjusted Tommy in his arm and put his free one around Emmy’s waist.

“Hold onto me tight,” he whispered and bit his tongue when he remembered how he always said that to Felicity when they were having sex since he knew exactly that when she had imagined him saying that under _very platonic circumstances_ , she had actually imagined him saying that under not so platonic circumstances.

Anyway, Emmy put her arms around his neck and he got up from the rocking chair, holding both of his kids in his arms. He strolled over to the bedroom, finding Felicity indeed sleeping in the middle of the bed. Chuckling quietly, he put the kids down onto the mattress.

“Emmy, I forgot Tommy’s pacifier. Can you go get it, please?”

“Yes,” Emmy replied with a nod and slid off the bed to run to the nursery and get her brother’s pacifier.

Oliver meanwhile pushed Tommy a little further onto the mattress before he carefully lifted Felicity and moved her over to her side of the bed. He shortly considered dressing her into her pajama, but then decided that he shouldn’t make the situation any harder than it already was. So he just made sure she was lying comfortable and wrapped the blanket around her before he pecked her lips shortly.

Felicity stirred and mumbled sleepily, “I’m awake.”

“You’re not,” Oliver whispered against her lips.

“I could wake up, though.”

“No need. The kids are sleeping here tonight.”

Felicity groaned. “Gotta be more creative about having sex.”

“Next week,” Oliver whispered as quietly as possible into her ear to make sure Emmy, who had just returned with Tommy’s pacifier and a bunch of stuffed animals in her arms, wouldn’t hear. “No matter when. No matter how. But we are going to have sex.”

“Promise?” Felicity mumbled, barely opening her eyes to blink at him.

“Promise,” he replied and kissed her shortly once more.

When their lips parted, she was already snoring softly again, so Oliver only bit back a chuckle and walked over to the other side of the bed. Emmy immediately climbed over her brother and snuggled up to her mother and even in her sleepy state Felicity wrapped an arm around Emmy’s waist and moved her nose against her daughter’s hair, breathing her in.

Oliver watched them shortly before he got under his blanket and pulled Tommy against his chest. The little boy looked at him with half-closed eyes. He was doing that sweet thing where he sucked at the pacifier and it moved in and out between his lips slightly. It was the cutest thing in the world. Sighing, he rested his head on the pillow and moved his chin over Tommy’s head, shielding him from whatever danger there could be.

He loved sleeping in a family bed. The even breathing of his loved ones calmed him down and protected him from nightmares. And so did the warmth of their bodies and the scents of their skin and the low sounds they made – Felicity’s quiet snoring, Emmy’s low sighs and even Tommy’s occasional, sleepy cries. Having a family bed was the second best way to fall asleep.

The best was post-orgasm with Felicity’s body underneath him as his mattress and pillow and her arms wrapped around him like the warmed blanket in the world and her heartbeat as his own personal lullaby.

Next week, he thought. No matter when. No matter how.


	99. Let's get it on

“How about we just buy all the dresses, skip the trying on and use the rest of the day that Thea and Laurel will spend with the kids to catch up on all the hot, passionate sex we’ve been missing in the last forty-nine days?”

Groaning quietly, Felicity turned around to Oliver, wrapped her arms around his waist and put her chin to his chest while looking up at him. When Oliver looked back at her with a slightly grumpy expression on his face, she puckered her lips and put on what Oliver would call her cute face, the one she used to get away with for everything and the one she used to get whatever she wanted. With a low chuckle he put his hands to her lower back, the lowest part of her back actually – his fingertips were grazing her ass to be exact – and cocked his head in question.

“You’re using the names of your sister and your ex-girlfriend in the same sentence as ‘sex’?”

“See how desperate I am?”

Felicity smiled up at Oliver lovingly and lifted her hand to gently stroke his stubble with her fingertips. With an indescribable mixture of a sigh and a groan Oliver snuggled his cheek into her touch and closed his eyes.

“I know it’s not fair that we are spending the one day we got rid of the kids in a boutique instead of our bed, but this is really important to me. I want to be a really good CEO, but I can only be good at what I am doing when I feel comfortable, and to feel comfortable I need to be wearing clothes I feel comfortable in, but most of my wardrobe just doesn’t work with what a CEO should wear.”

“I could offer you some of my suits, dress shirts and ties,” Oliver grumbled.

Felicity intensified the cuteness factor of her so-called cute face by pushing her bottom lip forward slightly. And the second she saw him rolling with his eyes, she straightened up onto her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek, knowing that he had admitted defeat.

“Only ten new outfits. I’ll hurry,” she promised. “You go in that direction, I will go in this one and in ten minutes we will meet here and I will try on what we found, okay?”

Oliver nodded grimly. “Anything in particular I should look out for?”

“Well, it should be appropriate for a CEO – my definition of appropriate and not yours by the way,” Felicity added when she saw the lustful expression in his eyes and Oliver made a pouting face that made Felicity chuckle. “Other than that you know what I like, so you have full reign.”

“If I had full reign, we would be in bed and I’d be screwing your Brains out,” Oliver grumbled as lowly as possible, so the mother that passed them with one young child on each of her hands couldn’t hear.

“The sooner we get done with the shopping, the higher the chances that there is still time for you to screw my Brains out,” Felicity whispered back.

Oliver pursed his lips shortly in response before he gave her a nod and repeated Felicity’s suggestion from before, “We’ll meet here in ten minutes.”

Just like Felicity had suggested they headed into different directions.

If he hadn’t known how important her future job as CEO was to her, he would have probably been less understanding and had just seduced her into staying home with him and having sex all day. And they both knew that if Oliver had really tried, Felicity would have stood no chance. But Oliver _did_ know how much it meant to Felicity, and hence he was helping her instead of getting in her way. Hopefully he was rewarded for being a good husband later on.

When the ten minutes were up, Oliver had a pile of clothes over his right arm. He took in the four hangers in Felicity’s hand and cocked his head.

“Hon, you have to at least make an effort to get us out of here sooner.”

“I am,” Felicity replied. “I filtered more specifically than I would usually do, so I don’t have to try on so many outfits.”

“I thought I am sparing us time by giving you more possibilities, so we don’t have to head to a second boutique,” Oliver explained his strategy.

“You get so thoughtful when you know it helps to get sex,” Felicity said with a quiet chuckle.

Oliver took the four dresses from her hand, put them over the others on his forearm and wrapped his free arm around her waist to lead her to the changing rooms. On his way there he casually kissed her temple, and Felicity leaned more into his side.

“Are you in cuddle mode because you are trying to accelerate the foreplay, so we can skip it when we get back home and instead get right to the main event then?” Felicity asked.

“I would never skip foreplay,” Oliver answered and put the clothes she wanted to try on to one of the pleasantly commodious changing rooms. “But we might have to delay it to after the main event… in case we ever get to that.”

“You’re getting all grumpy again,” Felicity teased and moved her forefinger along the deep frown on his forehead.

“You promised to hurry,” Oliver replied and crossed his arms in front of his chest defensively. “You don’t look like you’re hurrying.”

“Oh-oh! Now you’ve got full grumpy face!”

Chuckling, Oliver shook his head and then kissed the tip of her nose before he said, “You go and try on the dresses now. I’ll wait here.”

“Do you want to see them when I wearing them?”

“Of course I do! You cannot steal the only fun thing there is about this from me.”

Felicity straightened up onto her tiptoes and pecked his lips shortly. When she turned around, Oliver lightly slapped her ass and winked at her when she turned her head towards him and looked at him with a grin. He waited until Felicity had disappeared behind the curtain before he dropped onto one of the chairs for the people waiting and took a quick look around.

Right at the other end of the line of chairs sat a man at approximately the same age as Oliver. He was playing Candy Crush on his phone. Oliver watched him intently, but the guy didn’t seem to sense his gaze. He actually seemed completely oblivious of everything around him. Even when his wife, a pretty redhead came out from the changing room to show the dress she wore to him and look at herself in the mirror that reached from the floor to the ceiling, he only looked up shortly and murmured some short comment.

Oliver frowned at the sight. He doubted that the guy was as undersexed as Oliver was because nobody was as undersexed as he was, and still Oliver was better in pulling himself together than that. He actually felt sorry for the redheaded woman since she was asking question after question to get more of her husband’s attention, but the guy just didn’t seem too interested in his wife’s appearance. When she looked at herself in the mirror with a sad expression in her eyes, Oliver smiled comfortingly and gave her a thumbs up for the dress she wore. She smiled in appreciation. Her husband didn’t even notice.

When he heard the sounds of the curtain being pulled aside, he turned his head to see Felicity step out of her changing room. She wore one of the dresses she had picked herself – a blue, a-lined dress that reached just above her knees, had long sleeves and a low neckline. She stepped in front of the mirror and tugged at the hem of the dress.

“Do you like it?” Oliver asked, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees while he took Felicity in.

“I don’t know,” Felicity answered. “What do you think?”

“If you would have been completely enthusiastic about it, I might have said yes,” Oliver replied, taking another look up and down her body. “But no. Try the next one!”

Felicity disappeared back behind the curtain, and Oliver shortly glanced at his watch. Laurel and Thea were taking care of the kids for a few more hours. He had tried to get them to take the kids for the night, too, but his pleading had fallen on deaf ears. With little Tommy being still crazily exhausting nobody volunteered to take the kids for the night. He moved his fingers over his scalp and breathed out a long sigh.

“Can I help you?”

When Oliver looked up, he saw a young shop assistant standing right next to him and smiling down at him politely.

“No, thanks,” he replied. “I think my wife and I have everything we need.”

The young woman nodded, but didn’t turn away. She just kept staring at him. Oliver cocked his head in question and she laughed nervously.

“Sorry, but… You’re Oliver Queen, right?”

Oh, crap!

“Yes, I am,” he said, putting on the same faked smile he had used in his first year back in Starling City way too often. When he heard the curtain being pulled aside once more, he gestured towards Felicity but didn’t take his eyes off the shopping assistant. “That’s Mrs. Queen by the way.”

The shop assistant blushed, and Oliver had to bite his tongue to not burst out into loud laughter. When she turned her head towards Felicity and asked her if there was anything she needed help with, Oliver winked at Felicity, and she smiled back at him shortly before she told the shop assistant that there wasn’t anything she needed. The dark-haired woman nodded, smiled at Oliver once more and disappeared.

Oliver rolled his eyes and shook his head. He had left the party world so long ago, everyone should know by now. And still people everywhere knew who he was, sometimes even mistaking him for the same guy he had been before the island and he had pretend to be his first year back after the island. Being married and having kids didn’t seem to count for any character development.

“How long are you going to stare after that woman?”

Oliver chuckled. “Sorry. I was a little bit lost in my thoughts about how people still mistake me for- Wow!”

Only now he really took in Felicity. She was wearing a dress he had chosen. The dark green color reminded of the one of his leather suit. The deep neckline allowed him to see the top of Felicity’s breasts without showing too much. The short sleeves let him admire her strong arms. The tight-fitting skirt accentuated her ass and legs in the best way possible. Oliver felt his mouth go dry.

“It’s good, isn’t it?” Felicity asked, looking at herself in the mirror and smoothing the invisible creases from the dress. She didn’t wait for his answer; not that Oliver was in the right state to get out any sound. “I don’t even need you to say that it is good because it is just so great. I’ll try on the next already. If we keep going by this rate, we will still have time for at least a little quickie when we get back home.”

She disappeared behind the curtain once more. Oliver kept his eyes on the fabric, and he could almost see her still standing there in that dress. From the corner of his eye he noticed the uninterested husband looking at him. Felicity’s comment about the quickie had probably raised his attention. When Oliver looked at him, though, he hastily returned his focus to his phone. So Oliver shot a short glance over his shoulder and into the store. There were only few people. The shop assistant that had been here before was talking to a young girl, obviously accusing her of trying to steal.

Before he really knew what he was doing, he was already getting up from the chair and walking to Felicity’s changing room. He didn’t waste another gaze over his shoulder to figure out who might be seeing what he was doing. With a quick movement he pulled the curtain just as far aside as was necessary for him to get into the changing room and hastily closed it behind him.

Felicity straightened up from where she was leaning over a chair or rather the pile of clothes she still needed to try on on it. She held a pink dress in her hands, the one she probably wanted to try on next. She looked up and down at him curiously, cocking her head in question, her brow slightly furrowed.

Just when she opened her lips to probably ask him what he was doing, Oliver took a step forward. As commodious as the changing room was for a changing room, it was still only a changing room and hence still what could be considered as a really small room. So in the small of the room Oliver only seemed taller and broader than he already was, and Felicity automatically took a step back only to feel her back hit the wall behind her.

Neither of them said anything, and neither of them moved. They just stared at each other while standing opposite of each other without their bodies being in touch. There was a handbreadth of distance between their chests; enough to keep their chests from touching even though they were both breathing heavily but not enough to prevent them from feeling the heat radiating off the other.

“Oliver, what-?”

Before another whispered sound could escape her lips, Oliver closed the rest of the distance between them. While his arms wrapped around Felicity’s waist, his lips came crashing down onto hers. Felicity dropped the dress to the floor in surprise, but used the fact that her hands were free now to wrap her arms around Oliver’s neck and grab a handful of his short hair. She pushed herself closer to him almost like she was trying to melt her body with his. Oliver moved his hands from her waist to her hips and down her thighs to the back of her knees. He lifted her from the floor like she weighted nothing and caged her in between his body and the wall even more.

Oliver’s stubble scratched Felicity’s skin, but she didn’t mind. It rather increased how much she enjoyed the kiss. She gripped the hair at the back of Oliver’s head more firmly, trying to get even closer to him. Their lips opened in the same moment, their tongues meeting in a battle for dominance that only took a short moment until Oliver left the upper hand to her. Felicity moaned into the kiss quietly, enjoying the way she was completely surrounded by Oliver and there was nothing but him.

When he slowly started rubbing his hips against hers, she wrapped her legs around his hips, allowing herself to move against him and get more friction between her thighs were everything screamed in need for more and at the same time allowing Oliver to move his hands away from her knees and up the outsides of her thighs. Goosebumps were eliciting where his calloused fingertips moved over her soft skin. They stopped mid-thigh – way too far away from her most sensitive parts.

The kiss became less urgent and instead slower and gentler until Oliver brushed his lips against Felicity’s once more, bumped his nose against hers carefully and pulled away with a low sigh. Felicity groaned in frustration. She tried to chase his lips with hers and push him back against her with the hand that still gripped some of his short hair, but Oliver didn’t move. With another quiet groan Felicity opened her eyes and met Oliver’s blue ones that were focused on her face intensely.

Felicity felt her heart skip a few beats before it started racing in her chest, pounding against her ribs so firmly she feared they would crack. All she could hear was the rushing of her blood in her ears. All she could smell was the masculine scent of his skin. All she could taste was the taste his lips had left on hers. All she could feel were his hands on her thighs and his strong body pressed against hers. All she could see was the intense expression of his deep blue eyes.

She focused on his eyes. His pupils were blown wide with lust. The color of his iris had darkened. She loved the way he looked at her. No matter how many times they had had sex by now and no matter how much her body and their relationship had changed over the years with marriage and kids Oliver still looked at her like she was the sexiest person he had ever seen.

And still there was the slight hesitation in his eyes. They had been kept apart for so long and still Oliver was aware enough to know that sex in a public place was not necessarily something Felicity would agree to if she wasn’t seduced into it. So he waited for her consent.

“Mrs. Queen… Did your husband leave?”

Felicity licked her lips and didn’t miss the way Oliver’s gaze moved to her lips shortly. It shot a jolt of pleasure right to her core.

“I think he got tired of shopping clothes and decided to go to the electrical store down the street,” Felicity replied. Her voice sounded rough. Her eyes never left Oliver’s face. “I don’t think he will come back anytime soon.”

“Oh… what a shame…” the shop assistant said. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No. I have everything I need.”

For a split second Oliver and Felicity smiled at each other before Felicity gave Oliver a short nod of consent and their lips met as urgently as they had before. Oliver’s teeth buried into her bottom lip shortly before their lips opened and their tongues made contact. They quietly moaned in unison.

Oliver moved his hands from where they had stopped in the mid of her thigh further upwards under the fabric of the dress to her hips. He rubbed himself against her core, and she could feel him hardening in his pants as quickly as she felt herself getting wet. If her pleasure kept increasing as fast as it did now, she would come before he would even be inside of her. And as much as Felicity craved the orgasm she had missed for so long, she really didn’t want this to end too soon.

So she unwrap her legs from Oliver’s hips and as soon as her feet were put to the floor, she pushed Oliver away a little. He stepped back immediately, his hands falling off her skin, and he looked at her with a surprised expression in his eyes, but before he could ask the question Felicity knew was on his lips, she changed their positions, so he was pressed against the wall instead. When their lips met in another hungry kiss, Oliver’s hands moved back to where they had been resting on her hips. He tried to lift her back into his arms, but Felicity shook her head.

“What-?” Oliver started whispering when Felicity’s lips lowered from his down his jaw and neck, but the question ended in a low growl when her fingers hastily opened the first two buttons of his dress shirt, and she nibbled at his collarbone. “God, Felicity.”

While they had been whispering before and tried to be as quiet as possible, her name dropping from his lips had been louder, a little bit too loud maybe to be overheard by everybody. Felicity pulled back a little and put her finger to her lips, reminding him to stay quiet, and Oliver nodded. He leaned forward to try and capture her lips with his which was the most efficient way for both of them to not make any sounds that could be overheard, but Felicity leaned her head back, so his lips couldn’t reach hers, and with a wicked smirk she sank to her knees in front of him.

She could feel Oliver’s gaze on her body while she was unbuckling his belt and opening his pants. When her fingers hooked into the waistband of his boxer briefs Felicity lifted her gaze to his face and locked eyes with him. Oliver’s head fell back against the wall, but his eyes stayed locked on hers. Ever so slowly she began pulling his boxer briefs down. A deep growl fell from his lips, and Felicity stopped her movements and shot him a warning gaze, so Oliver took in a deep breath and tried to regain his self-control.

Felicity pulled the fabric of his boxer briefs down the rest of the way, freeing Oliver’s hard erection. Immediately she took him into her hands and started stroking up and down from the base to the tip. Another growl left Oliver’s lips, and he hastily lifted his hand to his lips, moving the palm in between them and biting down on his hand.

She shot him another pointed look and waited until he nodded before she leaned forward and licked his cock the same way her hands had stroked it before, up and down from the base to the tip. Her tongue circled the tip before she moved back to the base and started again. She repeated it three times, always licking from the base to the tip, following the vein at the underside of his erection as she did so.

Her eyes stayed locked on Oliver’s the entire time, and they still didn’t look away when she pressed a short kiss to the tip of his cock and then slowly started taking him into her mouth. Her tongue massaged the underside of his cock, and her fingers stroked the part she couldn’t take in. She bobbed her head up and down slowly, and Oliver’s hips bucked forward without thrusting in too far. The hand he wasn’t biting massaged the back of her head in a wordless gesture of gratitude.

She continued this until she heard his breathing becoming erratic. Only then did she release him. He was close, but not too close to stop this before their fun would end too soon. So she pulled away slowly until his cock fell from her lips, and the next moment Oliver’s hands moved to her shoulders and pulled her to her feet. In an instance his lips came crushing down onto hers, and her back hit the wall when Oliver switched their positions back to how they had been at the beginning.

When she tried to wrap her legs around his hips, Oliver pushed her knees down to force her back to stand. His lips moved from hers over her cheek to her ear, and he bit down on her earlobe, making her sigh against his shoulder, before he whispered into her ear, “First I’ll return the favor.”

His words made Felicity’s stomach prickle, and she pressed her legs together, rubbing her thighs against each other to try and lessen her need. Oliver eating her out with his stubble scratching the insides of her thighs and his tongue and lips and teeth teasing her most sensitive parts made a needy whine fall from her lips. But given her reaction to imagining him doing that was already this she knew her reaction to him actually doing it might get them caught.

“Oliver, we’re in a public place,” Felicity whispered back. “Public places are meant for quickies, and quickies do not include eating out.”

“You changed the rules,” Oliver whispered back, his hands already pulling up the hem of the dress until the fabric was pooled around her waist. His fingers hooked into her panties, and slowly pulled them down until they fall to the floor. “You started this.”

He kissed the tip of her nose and pecked her lips before he lowered onto his knees. Carefully he lifted her right foot from the floor and put her leg over his shoulder, opening her up to him. He moved so close Felicity could feel his breath ghosting over her wetness, and she had to press her lips together to keep herself from making any sound.

Oliver gave her the same warning look she had given him before, not hiding the teasing grin on his lips. And just when Felicity cocked her head and was about to tell him to wipe that grin off his face, his moved his lips against where she wanted him and started licking. Felicity’s right hand gripped the hair at the back of his neck partly for support and partly to push him closer to her most sensitive parts. Her left hand came to rest over her lips, trying to muffle the sounds she made.

Oliver took his time. Just like she had licked his cock from the base to the tip before, he was now mimicking those movements by licking from her opening to her clit. He did again and again, making Felicity feel like she was on fire. When his lips stayed at her clit, closed around it and started sucking it into his mouth, Felicity cried out and even her hand couldn’t muffle the sound. They both stopped immediately. Oliver’s lips stayed where they were without sucking more. Their eyes met while they waited if they were getting caught.

“Mrs. Queen, is everything alright?” the same shop assistant from before asked worriedly.

Hesitatingly Felicity moved her hand from her lips. She had to gulp twice before she managed to choke out, “Yes. Just… the dress… is really… great… I got a… great reaction… about it.”

“O-okay,” the shop assistant said, and her voice left no doubt that she thought Felicity was crazy for showing that kind of reaction to a dress. But Oliver and Felicity could hear steps on the other side of the curtain, telling them that she had bought the lie and left.

Oliver pulled his head back slightly. He licked his lips dry and perked his eyebrow slightly, asking if she was ready to continue. Slowly Felicity let go of Oliver’s hair and put both her hands over her mouth. She ignored the amused grin on Oliver’s face and just gave him a nod.

His lips moved back to where everything in her screamed in need of his caressing. His tongue teased her entrance, parting her inner lips and entering just a little before pulling out and moving up to her clit. Oliver pressed the tip of his tongue against the little nub, and Felicity breathed out falteringly. He teased her with his tongue never entering and his attention to her clit never bringing her to too near to her high of pleasure for a while and only when her hips started moving against his face wildly, seeking the friction she needed so desperately, his lips closed around her clit and sucked.

Felicity’s head fell back against the wall with a low bump. Her eyes closed, and if she hadn’t increased the pressure of her hands against her lips, a loud cry would have fallen from them. Oliver held her hips in a strong hold, keeping them from moving while he kept sucking at her clit and flicking his tongue over the little nub.

A fire was building within her. She could feel herself nearing an orgasm, and she had to bite her tongue to keep from making any sounds that could be heard. When Oliver put one of his forearms over her hips, pressing them to the wall, she opened her eyes to see what he was doing, but before she could look at him, she felt two of his fingers entering her. Her head dropped back against the wall and her eyes closed again.

Her inner walls were clamping around his fingers while he was slowly thrusting them in and out of her hot core. She was so close to falling off the edge. All it took was another flick of his tongue over her clit, and she was falling apart. Her whole body was shaking. Her inner walls held Oliver’s fingers in a tight grip. No sound left her mouth as her hands were still pressed to her lips, but her breathing was so erratic, she wasn’t sure if it could be heard outside the small changing room.

Slowly she came down from her high. Oliver put her foot back to the ground, licked his fingers dry and got up on his feet. Felicity needed a short moment before she trusted herself to not make any sound, but as soon as she felt it was safe to take her hands off her lips, she grabbed the collar of Oliver’s dress shirt and pulled him flush against her.

Their lips met in another urgent kiss. She could taste herself on his tongue, and it only increased her need to have him inside of her as soon as possible. Her hands moved under the fabric of his dress shirt and over his shoulders down his back, so she could scratch the scarred skin there. Oliver’s arms wrapped around her waist, securing her to him, while his hips thrust against hers. His erection slid between her folds perfectly, and Felicity whimpered against his lips in response.

“Oliver,” she pleaded in a whisper, their lips meeting again as soon as the last sound had fallen from her lips.

And Oliver gave her what she craved for. He unwrapped his right arm from her waist, took hold of his hard erection and positioned himself at her entrance. Their lips parted when he slowly moved his hips forwards, pressing into her. Felicity’s mouth opened in a silent cry.  When Oliver was settled inside of her, they continued to look at each other for a long moment. And only then did they kiss again, their eyes closing. Their bodies stayed unmoving, though, letting them adjust.

It had been so long since they had had sex. Forty-nine days had been a long time for both of them. And although they were craving their pleasure, craving their own high, the intimacy – as stupid as that sounded given where they were – of the moment didn’t get missed by them. They were finally joined again. Their bodies were coming one once more after all this time in which the kids, work and whatever had kept them apart.

Felicity’s legs tightened around Oliver’s hips, and his hands pushed between her butt and the wall to massage the part of her body that was one of his greatest weaknesses and at the same time keep her from getting hurt when he started pulling out a little and thrusting back in, pushing her butt into his hands now instead of against the wall. His thrusts were short but firm. He knew the slapping of skin that would only grow louder if he would pull all the way out and thrust back in would be loud enough to be heard then, so kept them shallow. Their lips parted when their foreheads came resting against each others. Felicity’s hands were still roaming over Oliver’s back, scratching his scars.

“Good?” Oliver whispered.

Felicity nodded hastily. “So good.”

Since they had spent so much time without sex, Felicity’s walls felt tighter than usually, and with the standing position each of Oliver’s strokes hit just the right spots inside of her. No wonder their orgasms were fast approaching! Her skin felt like it was on fire. Her hips moved to thrust against him, pushing her butt into the palm of his hands more and more with each movement at the same time, and it only increased her pleasure more. When Felicity felt the familiar tingling in her toes, she pressed her lips back onto Oliver’s just in time to have him swallow her cries as she came undone in his arms for the second time this day.

Oliver kept thrusting. His thrusts were now becoming even faster. And when Felicity moaned his name against his lips in a whisper, he let go and let his pleasure wash over him. His hips stuttered against hers and he spilled into her with her walls milking his cock until he had nothing left to give.

Their lips stayed locked onto each others for a moment before Oliver’s head dropped to her shoulder with a sigh of her name. His forehead rested on her shoulder, his nose pressed to her chest to breathe her in. Slowly Felicity lifted her hands from Oliver’s back to the back of his neck to stroke up and down.

“Thank you,” he murmured against her skin.

Felicity chuckled, leaning her head against his. “You don’t have to thank me.”

“I wasn’t talking to you. I was talking to the dress,” Oliver replied, and Felicity could feel him smile against her skin. “The dress is amazing.”

“It is.” Felicity sighed before she pulled away a little to look at him. “By the way whenever I wear this dress for work that will be the unspoken invitation for you to come by and take me in my office.”

“Please don’t ever wear a different dress to work,” Oliver whispered.

Again Felicity chuckled quietly, but it ended in a quiet moan when Oliver pulled out of her. She could feel her juices and his seed run down the inside of her thigh, so she unwrapped her legs from Oliver’s hips and put her feet back onto the floor. When her legs started shaking, her knees threatening to give in, Oliver supported her stand with his hands to her hips until she nodded her okay for him to let go.

She looked around for anything to clean herself up with, so she first didn’t notice that Oliver was taking off his leather jacket and dress shirt. When she did, though, she cocked her head at him while her eyes were running up and down his naked chest, appreciating the toned muscles and scarred skin. She bit down on her bottom lip, feeling a new wave of pleasure nearing. Oliver must have seen what she was thinking because he stepped close to her, framed her face with his hands and kissed her gently.

“How about you clean yourself up with my dress shirt, change back into your own clothes and then we buy all of the dresses and see which one can trigger the same reaction?” Oliver asked.

“Great idea,” replied with a sigh, took the dress shirt from him and started drying her inner sides of her thighs while Oliver was putting his leather jacket back on over his naked chest and zipped it.

When Felicity was finished cleaning herself up, she pushed the dress shirt into her hand purse and put her panties back on. Oliver stepped in front of her once more, and they smiled at each other adoringly. He framed her face with his hands and kissed her lips.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” she whispered back.

He pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose and chuckled amusedly when she scrunched her nose. Letting go of her, he went to the curtain and peeked out. Nobody seemed to be watching. The uninterested husband was still or again playing on his phone. Oliver shot back a look at Felicity, who was starting to undress herself. She smiled at him, and Oliver winked at her, making her bite her bottom lip. He knew that he wasn’t good at resisting her when she did that, so he hastily stepped out of the changing room.

Of course just then the uninterested husband’s head lifted, and the guy looked right at him with wide eyes, certainly knowing exactly what had happened almost right beside him. But Oliver didn’t care. Ignoring the guy’s gaze on him, Oliver licked his lips, still tasting Felicity on them and sat back on the chair he had been sitting on before their little… encounter. He could still feel the other guy’s gaze on his skin and just grinned in amusement like a Cheshire Cat. Thank God he was an attentive husband, the kind who not only accompanied his wife to a shopping tour but helped her find the right clothes.

When Felicity stepped out of the changing room, he got up and took the pile of clothes from her, so she could adjust the handles of her purse on her shoulder and ease out the invisible creases from her clothes. He watched her closely and had to bite back a comment about her after-sex-look. Her hair was a little messy, her lips red and swollen. He loved when she looked like that.

“Ready?” he asked.

Felicity smiled at him and nodded. “Sure.”

Just when they were about to turn around and leave to buy the dresses and head home where they would hopefully have a lot of more sex until they had to pick the kids up, he saw Felicity glancing at the husband, who was now staring at the two of them. Immediately her cheeks turned red and she lowered her gaze nervously, biting her lip.

Oliver only chuckled at that, put his arm around her waist and pulled her away with him.

“I think he noticed something,” Felicity whispered.

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Oliver, he stared at us like he had actually just watched us doing what he did.”

“What exactly did we do again?” Oliver asked and only laughed out loudly when Felicity slapped his chest. “Who cares if he knows? We are married people with exhausting children, and we used the rare possibility for some private time.”

Felicity let out a low groan, still not very happy with the answer, but she let it go.

“Can you please wipe that grin of your face?” Felicity asked while they strolled through the boutique and to the cash office. It was probably meant to sound strict but failed since her question ended in an amused chuckle. “You look like a kid on Christmas Eve.”

“Well, I will get to unwrap you today. It does feel like Christmas a little bit. Besides, I can cross one of the fantasies for the two of us off my list.”

Felicity stopped and looked at him with perked eyebrows. “You have a list full of fantasies?”

Oliver nodded with a smirk but then frowned. “Don’t tell me you don’t have a list of things you want to try with me.”

“I don’t have a list like that,” Felicity replied. “Where is that list? I want to see it.”

“The list is in my head,” Oliver explained, tapping his temple with his forefinger. “And even if I had written it down, I wouldn’t show you.”

“Why?” Felicity asked. “I am the only one who can make it real, so you should give me that list, so I can put your fantasies to action.”

“I can’t believe you just said that sentence out loud in public,” Oliver stated, and Felicity hastily turned her head to both sides, trying to figure out if anybody had overhead her saying that, but obviously nobody had.

“I want to know what fantasies you have for us,” Felicity explained with whispered voice when she turned back towards him.

Oliver shook his head. “No.”

“You’re mean,” Felicity stated, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Now I will spend weeks wondering what you fantasize about us.”

Oliver laughed. “Don’t pout like that, Felicity.”

“It’s mean. You’re mean!”

When they started walking again, Oliver wrapped his arm back around her waist and leaned his lips against her ear to whisper, “I’m not going to tell you what’s on the list. But I might show you a few things I was already able to cross off in the last years when we’re back home.”

Felicity felt a jolt of pleasure go right to her core and cleared her throat to keep herself from whimpering or anything. Instead she just nodded shortly. “Okay.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to her cheek. This was going to be a fun day!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will hopefully be posted Feb 26.


	100. The first day of a new life

_ _

_The morning (Felicity)_

Smiling, Felicity followed the smell of coffee and breakfast as well as the sounds of amused toddler laughing and happy baby giggle into the kitchen. Her heart warmed at the sight she was met with. Oliver stood at the stove, making an omelet, while Tommy lay on his blue blanket on the floor with Emmy kneeling beside him and leaning over him as she was peppering his little face with lots of kisses. The little boy seemed all too delighted about his sister’s caressing because he moved his short arms and legs wildly while he was giggling loudly.

“Morning,” Felicity said with a smile.

“Morning, mommy,” Emmy said immediately, her face showing the brightest smile. “You look nice.”

“Thank you so much, honey,” Felicity replied.

Oliver turned his head to look at her over his shoulder. It was only a short moment before he focused back on the pan with the omelet, but Felicity didn’t miss the lewd smirk on his face. She bit her tongue, knowing exactly that when she had bought this dress last week and tried it on at home, Oliver had reacted quite physical to it. It wasn’t the green dress that they had agreed would be their non-verbal invitation for Oliver to come by to her office for a quickie at anytime, though. Having an office quickie with her husband on her first day as CEO would really not make the best impression. Maybe in a few days the right time for this dress had come.

“Emmy, breakfast is ready. Come on, sit down at the table,” Oliver told Emmy while he was putting the omelet from the pan onto a plate and nodded towards her chair.

Hastily Emmy jumped up from the floor and ran to the table. But instead of sitting down on the chair or kneeling down on it like she usually did, she climbed on top of it to stand there. When Oliver placed the plate in front of her on the table, he cocked his head at her, wordlessly asking what she was doing because standing on a chair was only okay when she wanted to help cooking or if her mommy or daddy allowed her standing on a chair for other reasons. Emmy knew that.

“You can’t be bossy today, daddy!” she told him seriously.

“I can’t?” Oliver asked, perking his eyebrows.

Emmy shortly glanced at her mother and Felicity nodded, trying to keep her smile hidden when Oliver’s gaze followed his daughter’s. When Emmy started poking his chest with her little forefinger, though, Oliver’s gaze moved first to her finger on his chest and then to his daughter’s face.

“You can’t be bossy today, daddy!” she repeated her words from before. “Because mommy will be bossy today. Because she is the boss of multi-balloon dollar copo- copoo-poo-“

“Multibillion dollar corporation,” Felicity whispered loudly to help her daughter out with the right words.

“Multi-balloon dollar corpopo-“ she started again before she shrugged her shoulders and said, “What mommy said.”

“So daddy doesn’t get to be bossy?” Oliver asked, smiling amusedly, and Emmy shook her head. “Does that mean you’re not going to eat your breakfast because-?”

When Oliver took the omelet with the face he had drawn onto it with marmalade and turned around, acting like he was going to take it away from her, Emmy jumped onto his back and closer her arms around his neck.

“Daddy, no! I’ll eat it! I’ll eat it!”

Felicity chuckled. Her daughter loved omelets with marmalade more than she loved anything else. It was her favorite breakfast and if possible, she would also eat it for lunch and dinner and as a midnight snack and a snack in the middle of the day and whenever else she was hungry. Oliver leaned back until Emmy’s feet touched the chair. She sat down and as soon as her dad placed the plate back in front of her, she started eating like she hadn’t been fed in months.

While Oliver strolled back to the kitchen counter and poured a mug of coffee, Tommy made a dissatisfied sound, obviously not too happy about the lack of attention directed towards him. So Felicity picked up her little baby boy from his blanket and lifted him into her arms before she sat down on the chair next to Emmy with Tommy in her lap. Immediately the little boy reached his hand out and pulled at the low neckline of Felicity’s dress, pushing it down more to reveal her bra.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked with a chuckle and pushed Tommy’s hand away to adjust her dress. “You can’t just undress mommy.”

“Yeah, Tommy, you can’t just undress mommy,” Oliver agreed, placing the mug of coffee in front of Felicity on the table, and pressed a short kiss to the crown of Tommy’s head. “Undressing mommy is daddy’s job.”

“But mommy is the one with the job, daddy,” Emmy said, her mouth full of omelet and marmalade. “You don’t. So you take care of Tommy and me now, daddy.”

“Yes, but undressing mommy is still my job,” Oliver explained.

Emmy looked at Felicity with a small wrinkle between her eyebrows. “Can’t you undress yourself yet, mommy?”

“That’s it!” Oliver said before Felicity got the chance to answer. “Mommy can’t undress herself. That is why daddy has to do it.”

Felicity shot him a look, and Oliver used the opportunity of her head being bent back to press his lips to hers, capturing them in a gentle kiss that they both smiled into. He pulled her bottom lip in between his own lips and bit down gently before he released her lips. He didn’t pull back too far, just enough to be able to look at her.

“Nervous about today?” he asked.

“I know I probably should be, but I am really not. I am just so excited.”

Oliver kissed the tip of her nose, making her scrunch it.

“What is that with you and my nose?” Felicity asked.

“I don’t know,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, kissing the tip of her nose again. “I guess I just have a thing for it.”

Felicity shook her head, rolling her eyes, although she could barely hide the giant smile on her lips. She lifted the mug Oliver had poured for her and took a nip of the hot coffee, enjoying the delicious taste on her tongue.

“As for you not being nervous that is just right because you don’t have any reason to be nervous,” he told her. “You’re going to be great.”

Her heart skipped a beat at the certainty of his voice. There had been some moments when she had been nervous because leading a multibillion dollar company with thousands of employees all over the world was something completely different than managing a household of three to four people like she had done for the last years. But if there had still been any doubts left, the intensity of Oliver’s belief in her washed them all away right now.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered with a loving smile.

“I love you, too,” Oliver replied before he leaned down and kissed her lips.

When their lips parted, he didn’t pull back completely. Instead he moved his head a little to kiss the tip of her nose shortly once more, and then hastily stepped back.

“Okay, seriously, what weird thing do you have for my nose lately?” Felicity asked.

But Oliver didn’t reply. Chuckling, he ignored her question and just went over to the kitchen counter and put the dirty dishes of Felicity’s and his own breakfast earlier this morning into the dishwasher.

“How long will you be away, mommy?” Emmy asked, stuffing the last piece of her omelet into her mouth.

“I’ll be back before dinner,” Felicity replied. “And you get to have a fun day with daddy.”

“Every day will be a fun day with daddy from now on,” Oliver explained, leaning back against the kitchen counter and crossing his arms in front of his chest. “But…?”

“We’re gonna miss mommy very much,” Emmy finished her dad’s sentence, smiling at her mother.

“Awww! I am going to miss you, too,” Felicity replied. She glanced at her watch and sighed. “Speaking of, I guess it’s time for me to go now.”

Oliver nodded. “Come on, Emmy. Let’s accompany mommy to the door.”

“Okay,” Emmy replied and slid off the chair.

While they were walking to the door, Tommy rested his head on Felicity’s shoulder with a sigh, and she could feel his hand pull at the end of her ponytail lazily. Emmy grabbed her mother’s purse from the small table next to the door and held it out for Felicity to take it.

“Thanks, sweetheart,” Felicity said with a smile and put the handle of the purse over her shoulder before she turned her head to Tommy.

“Bye, buddy,” she said, kissing his rosy cheek and rubbing his back shortly.

Tommy giggled happily in answer and rested his head against his mother’s chin, putting his tiny hands to her jaws. Felicity pressed another kiss to his forehead, making him giggle again, and handed him over to Oliver. Immediately the little boy’s giggles stopped and he looked at his mother with wide eyes.

“Bye, sweetheart,” Felicity said, bending down and kissing Emmy’s lips.

The toddler cupped her mother’s face with her hands, kissing her once more, before she said, “Bye, mommy.”

Felicity smiled when she straightened up and turned to Oliver. Immediately Tommy’s short arms reached out for his mother to take him back into her arms, but Felicity only put a hand on her son’s back while she got up onto her tiptoes and kissed Oliver gently. When they pulled apart, they were both smiling.

“See you later,” Oliver said.

“Have a great day.”

“You, too.”

Felicity turned to the door, but as soon as her hand touched the handle, a loud cry resounded right behind her, and when she turned back around, she saw big tears rolling down her son’s cheeks. His little arms were still reaching out for her, and he tried to lean forward and get to Felicity as close as possible, but Oliver held him securely to his chest.

“Mommy is going to be back soon,” Oliver promised, rubbing Tommy’s back, and then looked at Felicity. “You’re going to be late.”

“Yeah…” Felicity said and bit down on her bottom lip.

Tommy was crying. He was crying, and he wanted to get to her, and she was leaving. How could she leave when he baby boy was doing that? How could she leave when he obviously didn’t want her to go?

“Felicity,” Oliver said gently, and her eyes snapped from her son’s eyes to her husband’s. “He is going to be okay. You have to go.”

“Yeah…” Felicity said again, but still she wasn’t moving.

So Oliver stepped forward. Keeping Tommy a little away from Felicity, so he couldn’t hold on to her clothes or anything, he put a hand to the back of Felicity’s head and kissed her firmly. When their lips parted, he looked at her intensely and although he didn’t say a word, Felicity knew exactly what he was trying to say.

It was okay to leave now.

Leaving now didn’t mean that she was leaving Tommy. He would cry a little more, but as soon as he would see that his crying wasn’t keeping her here, he was going to be okay again.

She could leave with clear conscience.

“Right,” Felicity replied like any of the words she knew his eyes had been telling her had actually been spoken and, taking in a deep breath, she stroked over Emmy’s curly hair, turned around and left, ignoring her son’s crying as well as possible.

When the door fell closed behind her, she took in another deep breath and closed her eyes for a short moment. Oliver was right. Tommy was crying often, and her leaving didn’t mean she was leaving him. Oliver and Emmy were there with him. She had to go to work.

Straightening her posture, she started walking to the car.

During the car ride she recalled the work she would have to do right now. She was first meeting some of the most promising employees of the company to discuss with them her vision of Queen Incorporated. Later she would have to meet with some partners that wanted to get to know her now that she was going to be the CEO of the company, and at last she would have to go through a whole bunch of documents that she hadn’t been able to finish when she had prepared herself for the job before today.

When she stepped out of the elevator on the floor where Oliver’s old office which would now be her office was, Emily, Oliver’s former and her current assistant, stepped forward, holding out a mug of coffee for her new boss.

“Thank you,” Felicity said with a grateful smile. “I am glad you decided to keep working here even though you get a new boss.”

Emily smiled. “I love my job. I see no reason to give it up as long as the company is in your family’s hands.”

“Glad to hear that,” Felicity replied. “Who is the first one I will meet with again?”

“Curtis Holt, Head of Applied Science. I will call the department and get him here.”

“Thank you,” Felicity said with a smile and sat down on the leather chair behind her desk.

Smiling, she took the framed photo of Oliver, Emmy, Tommy and herself that was placed on the edge of the desk into her hands and looked at it. The photo would have to carry her through her day without her family. She knew it was kind of ridiculous to miss them because she would see them again in a few hours, but she couldn’t help herself. She did miss Oliver and the kids a little bit already.

With a long sigh, she put the photo away again and pulled her tablet out of her purse. She had taken some notes about the people she was meeting with, and wanted to check what exactly she should know about Curtis Holt before she was meeting him. When she switched on her tablet, it wasn’t her usual screen that was shown, though.

“Oh my god,” she whispered, looking down at the collage of photos of her family.

She knew that Oliver wasn’t too skilled with a computer, never mind a tablet, and the fact that he had created this for her nonetheless, made her whole body feel warm and her skin prickling like he was actually physically touching her.

Smiling, she looked down at the photos. Photos of her and Oliver, photos of Oliver and the children and her and the children. Photos of the kids alone. It was just awesome. There was even a photo of Oliver’s naked chest. God, that man knew how to comfort her!

Hastily, she put the tablet away and grabbed her phone, sending him a short message.

**F:** Found your present. I don’t have words to say how grateful I am. You’re the best husband ever! Thank you so much! I love you.

**O:** Everything for you! I even had to black out Roy who just snuck onto one of the photos! By the way, I take kisses instead of words of gratitude, and Tommy has stopped crying two minutes after you left. Have a great day! I love you, too.

Felicity was just about to reply when the door opened, and Emily stepped in.

“Mr. Holt is here,” she said.

So Felicity put her phone away and nodded. Time to be a CEO.

 

 

_The afternoon (Emmy)_

Emmy was still not exactly sure if her mommy had made the best decision when she had left Tommy and her with daddy.

Daddy was great! He really was! When he was home, they always did fun things, especially when they were alone. And when mommy wasn’t there, daddy always gave her the best food; the one mommy said she couldn’t eat because it wasn’t healthy. So being alone with daddy was always fun.

But daddy also made mistakes mommy didn’t make. For example mommy always took care that there were enough sheets of paper for her to draw with the new watercolor uncle John had bought her. By now Emmy had told her daddy that she needed more paper three times, and he still hadn’t gotten her any. So now she had to draw on the walls of her room although she knew that that really was a bad idea. How could she give the pictures she had drawn to mommy or daddy or any of her aunts or uncles when the picture was drawn to the wall? Well, daddy would have to find a way for her to do that.

Daddy really had to learn a few things when he wanted to take care of Tommy and her every day from now on. Luckily, there was enough time for her to teach daddy a few things he would have to learn. And as long as he didn’t know, she would find a way to get Tommy and her through the day safely. Now that mommy wasn’t home, she was the woman of the house after all.

Sighing, she dipped the paintbrush into the cup of water to wash out the paint from the bristles. She hummed the melody of one of her favorite Disney songs while she tried to figure out what color to use next – green or red or maybe pink – when her daddy stuck his head into the room, looking around.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said. “Did you- Whoa! What happened to the wall?”

“I didn’t have paper,” Emmy replied. “Can we get the picture from the wall? So I can give it to mommy?”

“I don’t think so,” her daddy replied, mumbling something about painting it over, but she didn’t understand everything. “Did you see Tommy?”

Emmy’s eyes widened. A while ago Tommy had woken up, and her daddy had left her here in her room to change Tommy from his pajama back into some normal clothes and get him back here to join them. She might have heard the toilet being flushed, but she could be wrong. Sometimes she confused such things.

“Is Tommy not in his crib?” she asked.

“Uhm… no,” her daddy replied, scratching the back of his head which she knew he always did when he was nervous, or when he knew that mommy was going to use her loud voice on him. “I left him in the hallway because I needed to go to the toilet, and when I got back he was gone.”

“Gone?”

“Not there anymore.”

“So where is he?”

“I don’t know,” her daddy replied. “Do you want to come and help me find him?”

“Yes,” Emmy replied with a sigh. She let the paintbrush fall to the table and slid off the chair, wiping her hands clear on her jeans. “But I have to tell mommy when she comes back.”

“What do you have to tell mommy?”

She walked past her daddy into the hallway, looking around to find if he had just overlooked Tommy, but the little boy was nowhere to be seen.

“That you lost Tommy.”

“No, mommy doesn’t need to know that.”

Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she turned around to her dad and looked at him with a pointed expression on her face.

“Mommy needs to know. Mommy knows everything anyway.”

“Yeah… that might actually be right,” her daddy answered with a sigh. “So where do we look for him?”

“The stairs?”

“I already looked there. He’s not there.”

Emmy looked at her daddy, noticing the exhausted expression on his face. She took his hand and squeezed it gently.

“We will find him, daddy,” she told him. “Tommy likes to hide. He can roll himself now.”

“Yeah, I know,” her daddy answered with a sigh. “Where do we start looking for him?”

“You go to his room. I will look in mine.”

When they reached the door to her bedroom, Emmy let go of her daddy’s hand, telling him once again that everything was going to be fine, and they would find Tommy. She knew how scared her daddy was to lose Tommy or her or mommy. Sometimes he woke up in the middle of the night, screaming because he thought he had indeed lost them. It didn’t happen often, but when it did, she always crawled into daddy’s bed and held him tightly. She didn’t want to lose mommy or Tommy or him, either.

“Tommy?” she called out for her baby brother, and looked around her room. “Tommy?”

Normally he giggled when he heard her voice, but she couldn’t hear anything. She opened the doors of her clothes cupboard, checking if her baby brother had hidden himself there, but it didn’t look like it.

“Did you find him yet?” her daddy called from Tommy’s bedroom.

“No!” Emmy answered, running out of her room and into her parents’ room. “And you?”

“No,” her daddy answered, following her into the bedroom.

She could see the worry in his face, but she knew that there was no reason to be worried. It wasn’t like Tommy could have magically disappeared because things like that didn’t happen in reality. It was only in the books and the movies. And nobody could have broken in here and taken him because daddy and she herself would have noticed and kicked that person’s ass.

“Tommy!” Emmy called out for her brother once more. And this time there was a giggle that answered her call out for her baby brother. She looked at her daddy with a smile, saying, “Daddy, I think Tommy is under the bed.”

They both lay down on the floor, pressing their cheeks to the carpet, so they could look under the bed. Tommy lay with his back against the wall, giggling happily at them. His little arms reached out for someone to pull him away from under the bed.

“There you are!” their daddy sighed out in relief. “Do you have any idea how much you scared me?”

He tried to reach his arm out for Tommy, but her daddy’s chest was just too broad to fit under the bed. So he got up and pushed the bed away a little with his strong arms, so he could lift Tommy from the floor and into his arms. They all lay down on the bed, Tommy with his back on the mattress, daddy and Emmy lying on their stomachs, leaning over the little baby boy.

When her daddy started kissing him, Tommy made little sounds, a mixture of happiness and displeasure. Tommy loved being kissed. Tommy just hated daddy’s stubble, but he was the only one in the family who hated it, so he didn’t get any say in that matter. Emmy really couldn’t see daddy without his stubble.

She watched her daddy intensely. Her mommy had told her that it was very important for daddy to spend more time with Tommy and her. When he had been younger, before he had even known mommy, he had been far, far away from his family for a long, long time. That was why his family was now even more important to him. And he really wanted to do everything right.

“Daddy?” Emmy asked.

He turned his head to her, resting his cheek on Tommy’s tummy. Emmy rested her head on her arm and put her hand to her daddy’s cheek, moving the tips of her fingers through his stubble like her mommy always did for him. She had watched her mommy doing that several times, and she had watched her daddy feeling better when she did.

“Maybe this time we can keep it from mommy,” she said, and watched a smile show on her daddy’s face.

“You think?”

“Yes. But just this time.”

“Just this time,” her daddy repeated her words with a serious nod. “Thank you, honey.”

Smiling, Emmy leaned forward and pressed her open lips to her daddy’s closed ones. She knew how that whole kissing-thing worked. She had watched her mommy and daddy kiss very often, and she knew exactly was to do. When her lips parted from her daddy’s she nuzzled his nose with hers and smiled brightly.

“I love you,” her daddy whispered.

Emmy’s smile widened. “I love you, too.”

They stayed like that for a little while until Tommy made a sound of discomfort.

“Daddy?”

“Hm?”

“I think it is time for Tommy’s bath.”

 

 

_The evening (Oliver)_

“One more spoon for mommy, and that’s it,” Oliver said, moving the spoon with the self-made carrot puree to Tommy’s lips, but the little boy turned his head away. “It’s just one more spoon, buddy.”

But Tommy kept turning his head away, moving his arms in front of him like he was trying to push Oliver’s hand with the spoon away. So Oliver shrugged his shoulders and ate the last spoon of puree himself before he lifted Tommy from his lap and onto his hip. He took the now empty bowl and carried it to the kitchen counter.

Through the window he could see a familiar blonde ponytail by the door. From his spot behind the kitchen counter he couldn’t see the rest of the person, but he didn’t have to. He would recognize that ponytail everywhere.

“Hey, Em, mommy is coming home!” Oliver called over his shoulder.

It was still new to call her Em, and he still wasn’t sure if he liked it. A few days ago the toddler had stated that she was almost three years now which meant that she was a big girl and would rather be called something different from Emmy because Emmy was a name for little girls. Usually Oliver would still call her Emmy because no matter how old she was, she was still his little girl, and three years were just so far away from being a big girl that he forgot about her wanting a new name regularly anyway. But sometimes he called her Em to give her her head.

He walked to the door between the kitchen and the entrance area just in time to see Emmy jumping up into her mother’s arms and peppering her face with lots of kisses. Up until last week that had been how he had been welcomed home by her after coming back from work, too. It warmed his heart to see this.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Felicity said between two kisses to her cheek. “Did you have a fun day with daddy?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed happily and put her hands to her mother’s cheek, framing her face. “But I missed you, mommy.”

“Awww, I missed you too, honey,” Felicity said, kissing her daughter’s lips once more.

When Tommy released a low cry, his arms already reaching out for his mother, Oliver chuckled and kissed his son’s temple before he said, “I know you want to welcome mommy home, too.”

He stepped forward, wrapping one arm around Emmy to take her from Felicity while she lifted Tommy from his hips into her arm. Immediately the boy snuggled against Felicity’s chest. His head came to rest under her chin. His tiny hand tightened to a fist around the neckline of her dress.

“I guess that makes two people who missed me,” Felicity whispered against the crown of Tommy’s hair with a smile on her lips.

“Actually,” Oliver said with a low clearing of his throat and snuggled his cheek to Emmy’s head when she rested her head on his shoulder, “that makes three people that were missing you.”

Felicity smiled at Oliver over the top of their son’s head adoringly. It made like a thousand butterflies moving in the pit of his stomach. Despite being together and married for years her smile still made him react like it had done on their first day together. Hell, even before they had been together her smile had made him feel like this. So Oliver stepped forward and captured her lips with his.

“Hi,” he whispered against them when their lips parted.

“Hi,” she whispered back, barely more loudly than a breath. “How was your day?”

“Perfect,” Oliver replied. “Yours?”

“Great,” Felicity answered with a wide smile.

Oliver was just about to lean forward and kiss her again when Emmy asked, “Daddy, when is dinner ready?”

“Ten minutes I think,” Oliver answered, kissing her forehead. “How about Tommy and you go playing in the living room for a little bit, and I will finish dinner?”

“And mommy?” Emmy asked.

Felicity smiled. “Mommy will talk to daddy for a little bit.”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh, and Oliver let her down to the floor.

While Felicity took Tommy to the living room, Oliver went to the kitchen and took a look into the oven where Felicity’s favorite casserole was nearly finished. He straightened up and started to wash up the pot he had needed to cook Tommy’s puree and the bowl he had served it in when two arms wrapped around him from behind, and an all too familiar form pressed into his back.

“Hi,” he said, letting go of the pot and bowl to put his hands on top of Felicity’s and lean back against her a little.

“Hi,” she answered with a sigh, snuggling her face in the spot between his shoulder blades. He could hear her inhaling deeply while her nose pressed against his back. “Thank you for your surprise.”

“You are very welcome,” Oliver replied. “I thought it would help you getting through the day without the kids.”

“And without you.”

“And without me,” Oliver repeated with a chuckle.

He turned around in her arms and put his arms around her shoulders. Felicity rested her chin on his chest and looked up at him adoringly. He leaned down and kissed her gently, tugging a strand of her blonde hair that had loosened out of her ponytail and fallen to her face behind her ear while he did so. She let out a little sigh when their lips parted, and Oliver used the opportunity of her eyes still being closed to kiss the tip of her nose. He enjoyed the way she made a face.

That was the reason why he loved kissing the tip of her nose. Whenever he did, she made his face. She scrunched her nose and squeezed her eyes shut. She looked just adorable. And because he loved when she made that face, he always kissed the tip of her nose lately. But he wasn’t going to tell her because he just knew that if she knew, she wouldn’t make that face anymore.

Taking her hand, he went over to the kitchen table and sat down on one of the chairs, pulling her onto his lap. Her lips came down onto his once more, and Felicity put her hands to his cheek, letting his stubble scratch the tips of her fingers. He loved when she did that. It was only a little thing, but it still felt so intimate.

When their lips parted and he saw the unwavering look of love and adoration in her eyes as well as the beyond happy smile on her lips, he felt tears welling in his eyes. Hastily he snuggled his face to her neck, hiding his face there, so Felicity wouldn’t see. He closed his eyes to keep the tears from falling. This had been such a happy day. Everything had been perfect. He shouldn’t ruin it now. He really hoped Felicity wouldn’t see.

But when she gently stroked the back of his head, kissed his temple and whispered, “Hey, what’s wrong?”, he knew that had already lost. She had noticed because Felicity always knew how he felt.

“I’m sorry,” he said against the side of her neck, barely being able to swallow his sob. “I am just-“

His voice broke, and he took in a deep breath while Felicity’s hands were moving to his cheeks, and she bent his head back to look at him. There was worry in her eyes. Of course there was. Oliver didn’t allow himself to cry too often, so when he did, especially on a really happy day like this one was, of course it made her worry.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, lifting his hand to wipe the tears that had fallen away, but Felicity’s fingers were already there, wiping them away for him. And of course her fingers were a lot more gently than his own would have been, so he snuggled his face into the palms of her hands, closing his eyes with a sigh. She kissed his forehead, and again he whispered, “I’m so sorry.”

Felicity shook her head. “There is no reason for you to be sorry. Just tell me what’s going on.”

“I’m so happy,” he whispered without hesitation. “I’m happier than I ever thought I could be… and… I still can’t believe you’re letting me do this.”

“I told you that I wanted to go back to work anyway,” Felicity said. “So it was actually-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her, shaking his head. “Thank you for letting me do this despite what I am.”

Now a deep frown showed on her face. Her right hand was playing with the short hair at the back of his neck, but at his words her fingers stopped.

“What do you mean?” she asked. “What are you?”

Oliver chuckled through his tears, shaking his head. How did he deserve a wife like that? A wife who didn’t only forgive his mistakes but also never held them against him?

“Felicity, you and I know that I am a murderer. I killed people,” he whispered. “And still you let me take care of our kids and trust me with them like I-“

“Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him with firm voice and framed his face with her hands. “What you have done in the past is not that important because it is in the past and you have grown out of that. What is important is that you are a good man. You always have been. I never doubted that. And now you are an amazing father. You have been from the second we learned that I was pregnant. There is nobody, absolutely nobody in the world that I would trust our children more with than you. You have to know that, Oliver.”

His whole body was tingling from her words and the way she looked at him and the way her fingers played with his hair. Everything of this moment made his body tingling with love for this woman. How had he even gotten along before he had let her into his life completely?

“I love you, you know that?” Oliver asked.

Felicity smiled brightly. “I had a feeling you would.”

They smiled at each other happily, and just when Oliver was about to straighten up and kiss Felicity gently, the timer went off. Groaning, Oliver pulled back before his lips had gotten the chance to brush against hers. Instead he kissed the underside of her jaw, making her hum contently.

“Maybe when the kids are in bed, I can properly thank you for loving me that much.”

“I think if someone has to thank the other here, it’s me,” Felicity explained, and when Oliver cocked his head, she chuckled. “For the gift.”

“Hm… We could just thank each other.”

“Sounds great,” Felicity whispered, kissing him shortly. “But given that we had sex last week, I wouldn’t count on having sex this week. You know, two weeks in a row would be…”

“A miracle?”

“Yeah…”

Oliver nodded. “Let’s hope for a miracle, right?”

“Right,” Felicity replied with a smile and lowered her head to brush her lips against his shortly once more. “I guess you should take care of dinner. I’ll get the kids.”

He watched her sliding off his lap and walking to the door, thinking that he didn’t really have to pray for a miracle. He already had his – and yes, he knew it was sappy and one of those gross things you only read in all too cheesy books or that was said in painfully romantic movies, but that was how it was. Felicity and their family were his personal miracle.

Smiling, Oliver glanced back over his shoulder where Emmy followed by Felicity and Tommy came into the kitchen.

“Did you wash your hands, Em?”

“Yes.”

“Good,” Oliver said with a smile while Felicity was spreading out Tommy’s blanket on the floor next to the table.

“Daddy?” Emmy asked, kneeling down on the chair and sitting back on her heels.

Oliver turned around and looked at his daughter. “What’s going on?”

“Can you call me Emmy again?” she asked.

“Uhm… sure,” Oliver answered, cocking his head. “How come?”

She shrugged her shoulders, pushing her empty plate from one hand to the other without looking at him. When Felicity sat down next to their daughter, she held onto the plate and when Emmy looked at her, she shook her head, wordlessly telling the girl not to play with the plate.

“So it’s Emmy again?” Oliver asked.

Emmy nodded her head. “But when I am seven, you have to call me Em.”

“When you are seven?” Felicity asked. “Why seven?”

She shrugged her shoulders, and Felicity smiled in amusement, looking at Oliver. He mirrored her smile and put on the oven gloves and said, “I guess it’s time for dinner then.”

 

 

_The night (Tommy)_

Tommy was not sleepy! He really wasn’t. Why did his parents want him to go to bed?! He didn’t want to! He didn’t want to go to bed! He didn’t want to sleep! He didn’t need sleep! And he-!

Oh! A back rub! Tommy loved back rubs! Okay, okay… Maybe he was a little tired, but really just a little. It wasn’t enough to fall asleep. It really wasn’t.

His eyes felt a little heavy, and he closed them, all the while enjoying the gentle way his mommy’s warm hand rubbed up and down his back. He could allow himself a short moment to close his eyes. Just for a short moment.

…

Okay, his eyes had been closed a little. He should open them again and check if mommy was still here. But everything was dark. The warm hand on his back was missing. And nobody seemed to be anywhere near.

But he didn’t want to sleep alone! He hated being alone! He wanted mommy back! She couldn’t just leave him again! She had been away for so long earlier!

When his daddy lifted him from the crib and cradled him against his naked chest, Tommy kept crying for his mommy. Because mommy was what he wanted! Mommy was all he wanted!

“Did he wake up again?”

Oh! That was Emmy! Emmy! Emmy had to get mommy here! Mommy needed to be here!

“What do you think, Emmy? Cuddle time for the whole family in mommy’s and daddy’s bed?”

“Yes!”

Cuddle time for the whole family? Tommy could live with that. Cuddle times were always good times.

His daddy carried him to the bedroom he shared with mommy, and when Tommy could feel his body being laid down in his mommy’s arms, he stopped crying and rolled onto his side, snuggling up to his mommy’s warm body, so he could press his face against her chest. Mommy always smelled so delicious! His mommy’s hand came to rest on his back, and she rubbed it with her eyes closed.

Okay, maybe Tommy could sleep a little, too. Just closing his eyes and… maybe tighten a fist in mommy’s shirt just to make sure she wasn’t leaving again. Okay, okay, okay. Yes, he could sleep like this. This was okay. This was… It was okay.

Time for some sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If someone had told me a year ago that this fic would celebrate its first birthday the exact same day that the 100th chapter would be posted, I would have laughed, but here we are. Thanks to all of you amazing people who follow the story!


	101. Holiday Challenge

With a low groan Felicity took of her high heels, enjoying the way the hardwood floor cooled the hurting soles of her feet. It had been an incredibly long day with one meeting following the next. She had left home early this morning and not even made it home for dinner. The kids were probably in bed already which meant she hadn’t seen them all day.

Starting to walk to the living room where she could hear crashing sounds of what was probably an action movie, she let her blazer slide down her shoulders and arms and drop down onto the floor carelessly. She had never understood Oliver’s need to just drop his suit jacket and tie off his body as soon as he had come home until she had started to work again. Losing her high heels and blazer just made her feel so much more comfortable and so much more like being at home.

Just not nearly as home as seeing Oliver made her feel she thought, and a smile formed on her lips when she reached the living room and caught first sight of her husband since she had left the house this morning after a quick kiss to his lips. He was sitting on the couch, leaned back into the cushions of the back rest with his arms crossed in front of his broad chest. His naked feet were resting on the couch table which he knew she hated, but he kept ignoring. His eyes were closed, and if it wasn’t for the small smile that slowly appeared on his lips, she would have thought he was asleep.

Not opening his eyes, Oliver reached out one hand for her, and Felicity wasted no second. She almost ran towards him on her tiptoes, crawled onto the couch and right into his lap. Her hands came to rest on his cheeks, framing his face with his stubble scratching her palms. Her dress had ridden up on her thighs, giving Oliver the freedom to move the tips of his fingers over the soft skin of the outsides of her thighs, and given the growing smile on his lips Felicity was sure that he could feel the goosebumps his touch was eliciting.

Felicity watched him closely. With his eyes closed and his face resting in her hands he couldn’t look more peaceful. She knew there had been a time when he wouldn’t have been able to relax like that. No matter how much he had trusted her, his mistrust in the world had been bigger. Not anymore.

Stroking her thumbs over his stubble, she leaned forward until her lips brushed against his. It was a gentle and loving kiss. Their lips touched without any pressure and when the tip of Oliver’s tongue traced her bottom lip, Felicity gladly granted him entry to her mouth. Their tongues met in a slow dance that made both of them release low sighs.

When their lips parted and Felicity opened her eyes, she found Oliver already looking at her, a content smile on his lips.

“Hi,” she whispered with a smile on her lips, moving her hands to the back of his head, stroking her hands through his hair down to his neck and shoulders again and again.

“Hi,” he whispered back, smiling up at her while his hands were moving a little higher on her thighs before dropping to her knees. “You’re home quite late today. Busy day?”

“Hm-hmm,” Felicity hummed with a nod of her head. “Do our kids still know what I look like?”

“I think they have a vague idea,” Oliver replied, and Felicity could see the grin he failed to suppress. “Whenever they see a blonde with glasses, they call her mommy.”

Felicity slapped his chest lightly, making Oliver chuckle. He slid his hands up her back under the fabric of her dress, massaging her tight back muscles while simultaneously pushing her down against him, so he could kiss her just as lovingly as they had kissed before. And when their lips parted this time, Felicity watched Oliver licking his lips in a try to chase the taste of her lips on his.

“Did you have dinner already?”

“Yes.”

Oliver cocked his head, looking at her doubtingly. “Real dinner? With some vegetables?”

Felicity bit her tongue. “There was a slice of cucumber on the burger I munched during two meetings.”

“That does not count.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “You are supposed to get Emmy to eat vegetables, not me.”

“I can try to get the both of you to eat vegetables,” Oliver replied. “I’ll cook you steak with vegetables for dinner tomorrow, alright?”

“I only eat the steak.”

“You only get the steak after you eat the vegetables.”

“You hate me.”

“I love you, and I want you to be healthy.”

“Fine,” Felicity said with a groan. “I just can’t resist you when you say such sappy things.”

“Really?” Oliver asked, his lips brushing against hers shortly. “Because I have a lot of sappy things to say to you then.”

Felicity chuckled. “Okay, what do you want?”

“Why would I want something?” Oliver asked, his voice sounding all too innocent. He avoided her gaze, looking at where his fingers disappeared under the hem of her skirt. Only when she put her hand beneath his chin and lifted it to make him look at her, he sighed and admitted, “There is something I want.”

“Shoot!” Felicity prompted.

Oliver sighed once more and straightened up, adjusting Felicity in his lap, so there was a little more distance between them. Worriedly Felicity traced the wrinkle between Oliver’s brows. The relaxation from before seemed to be gone now.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Felicity asked hastily, framing Oliver’s face with her hands gently. “Talk to me.”

“The holidays are fast approaching,” Oliver stated, his hands moving up and down the outside of her thighs lazily. “And that got me thinking.”

Felicity frowned slightly but nodded.  
There were indeed only a few more weeks until Christmas and Hanukah. She knew that Christmas was a big deal for Oliver since it had always been the one holiday his family had really taken time to celebrate, no matter how many things had been going on in Queen Consolidated. She knew that celebrating the holidays – and that for him included Hanukah because of her – was important to him.

“I want these holidays to be special.”

“Because it is Tommy’s first Christmas and Hanukah?” Felicity asked.

Of course she knew that Tommy would never remember his first Christmas/Hanukah holidays, but she was also sure that no matter how often she would tell him that, Oliver would not listen anymore than he had the first twenty times she had tried to tell him.

“And it is Emmy’s first chance at a happy one, too,” Oliver added.

Felicity’s frowned deepened. “Why would-?”

“Two years ago Emmy started saying ‘dadda’ to every guy she caught sight of,” Oliver reminded her, and Felicity stroked her hand over Oliver’s cheek comfortingly, knowing how much it had affected him back then. “I overreacted and missed all the pre-holiday time with you. And last year-“

“I know,” Felicity interrupted him in a whisper, silently begging for him not to say the words out loud.

The year before the holidays had been a horrible mess. Her prenatal depression had been undiagnosed at that time, so her pushing Oliver further and further away from her had led him to think that she didn’t love him anymore. She knew from what he and her mom had told her that he had cried in Donna’s arms during Christmas Day because of that. Because of her.

“It wasn’t your fault, Felicity,” Oliver whispered the same words he had told her so often already. “You were sick.”

She nodded, not really convinced of his words. Just like she had done for him before, Oliver put his fingers beneath her chin and lifted her face, making her look at him.

“I know Emmy can’t remember anything that happened the last two years, and she probably won’t be remembering what happens this year, and neither will Tommy, but we will remember. We will remember the last two years, and we will remember this year. And that is why I really want this Christmas and Hanukah and the time before to be a happy one.”

Felicity nodded. “That would be nice. Any plans?”

“Actually,” Oliver answered with a grin, “I do.”

“Shoot.”

“Do you know these so and so days challenges?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied with a nod of her head.

“I think we should do something like that. We will do something special every day from now until the day before Christmas Eve. Celebrating the first and second night of Hanukah would be our special things to do for December 22 and 23.”

“Well, I have to work most of those days.”

“I know,” Oliver replied with a quiet sigh. “And it doesn’t have to be big things. Just… little things maybe. And you don’t have to take care of anything. I will take care of everything, okay?”

Felicity nodded and glanced at her watch. “You’ve got half an hour left to plan out something special for us to do in those thirty minutes that are left of this day.”

“Planning is already done.”

“Really?” Felicity cocked her head.

A grin spread on her face when she felt the tips of Oliver’s fingers moving up the outside of her thighs to her butt. He pulled her more fully into his lap, lazily pushing his hips up into hers. There was no doubt about what he had planned out to make this day special for the two of them with what was left of  the night.

“The kids?” Felicity asked.

“Asleep.”

“And you do know that you have only thirty minutes left, right?”

Oliver made an offended face. “Like I ever need thirty minutes.”

With that he turned them, pushing Felicity’s back into the cushions of the couch and started attacking her lips with his.

Suffice to say that he did not need thirty minutes to make the day end in a special way.

 

 

When Felicity came home the next evening, she found her three loved ones working on decorating the home with some Christmas and Hanukah goodness.

“Hi, hon,” Oliver greeted her, turning his head to press a short kiss to her lips while he was busy getting the mistletoe into place. “You came right in time.”

“In time for what?” Felicity asked.

“To check whether or not the mistletoe works.”

He let go of the mistletoe that was now placed perfectly in the frame of the door between the dining room and the living room to reach out his hand for her and pull her into his arms. As soon as her chest was pressed against his, his lips came down onto hers for a gentle kiss.

“I’d say it works,” Felicity whispered against his lips, resting her forehead against his and entangling their fingers. “Very well actually.”

Oliver smiled against her lips. “I thought this was a nice second special something.”

“It is,” Felicity replied. “Where are the-“

“Daddy, I found the lights!” Emmy called out, and when Oliver and Felicity turned their heads towards their daughter, they saw her struggling with the long chain of lights. She was holding part of it over her head while most of it was wrapped around her body and ending on the floor where it seemed to be entangled with another chain of lights that again was wrapped around Tommy’s body, so with every step Emmy took, she was dragging her little brother behind her over the floor.

“We better help them unwrap before Emmy starts decorating Tommy with baubles,” Felicity said with a grin, and Oliver nodded his head, agreeing with a quiet, “Right.”

 

 

“Do you think she is doing it right?”

“No.”

“Do you think we should stop her?”

“You stop her, daddy.”

“I don’t know how. She turns into a monster when I criticize her and I-“

“You do know that I can hear you, right?” Felicity asked, not lifting her gaze from the cookie dough.

“Oh-oh,” Oliver whispered into Emmy’s ear. “She knows. What are we going to do?”

“Distract her,” Emmy suggested, mimicking her father’s panicked voice.

“How?”

“Kiss her, daddy!”

“That’s a good idea,” Oliver agreed with a nod of his head, hurried to Felicity and turned her around to him, so he could kiss her. When their lips parted, he looked into the bowl with the dough and scrunched up his nose. “We should probably trash that.”

“You were the one suggesting baking for our third special day.”

“Yeah…” Oliver said, glancing at Emmy who said on the kitchen counter and observed her parents like they were her favorite movie.

“Plan was daddy and I bake. You only watch,” Emmy explained, and when Felicity cocked her head at her daughter, the toddler pointed her finger at Oliver. “Daddy’s words!”

“Emmy, you know what we said we have to do when mommy turns into a monster?”

“Run!” Emmy exclaimed, jumping from the kitchen counter and starting to run, followed by her father and finally her mother who was chasing both of them.

 

 

They did a dance party for their fourth perfect day.

Emmy danced between her parents happily, giggling when Oliver tried to dance up on her with an especially weird shake of his hips. She stepped onto Oliver’s or Felicity’s feet and danced like that for slow songs, and when Oliver asked for a dance with mommy, she pirouetted around her little brother, making him giggle like crazy.

When the kids were in bed, Felicity and Oliver switched to slow-dancing completely. She put her head on his shoulder and her arms around his waist. Closing her eyes, she enjoyed the way he wrapped himself around her, warming her whole body.

“This is nice,” she whispered.

“Yes, it is.”

“All of this has been a great idea.”

“I am glad you think that.”

“We could relocate this to our bedroom, maybe lose some of our clothes,…” she suggested.

“Would you be very disappointed if I preferred dancing like this?”

“Not disappointed,” Felicity replied, “only surprised. Oliver I-don’t-dance Queen wants to dance instead of having sex?”

Oliver chuckled. “See how much I love you?”

“See it, feel it, know it. And I love you, too.”

 

 

“For the record, you will be bathing her,” Felicity whispered when she watched their daughter wiping her hand over her mouth, effectively smearing the chocolate that had been around her lips all over her face and hand.

“I might have to admit that chocolate fondue with a toddler has not been my best idea.”

He took a napkin and tried to clean Emmy’s face a little, but she turned her face and pushed his hand away, saying, “Daddy, no!”

Chuckling, Felicity put a hand on Oliver’s arm, keeping him from trying to wipe Emmy’s face clean once more, so Oliver put the napkin down and took Felicity’s hand in his, kissing her knuckles.

“Mommy, can Tommy have some chocolate?” Emmy asked, looking at where her baby brother was lying on the floor, sucking his right foot into his mouth.

Felicity nodded her head, adding, “Just a little.”

Emmy dipped her forefinger into the warm chocolate and went over to her baby brother, leaving a trail of chocolate drops on the floor. She kneeled down next to Tommy and put her finger into his mouth. The little boy sucked eagerly.

“The chocolate on Emmy’s fault might be my fault, but the chocolate on the floor definitely isn’t.”

“I know,” Felicity said with a low groan. “I will clean that up.”

 

 

The sixth special thing Oliver had planned out for them were the photos for the holiday cards. What had been supposed to take an hour at maximum took several hours when Emmy started making faces and carried Oliver and Felicity along with it. Tommy was the only one smiling, laughing and giggling on every photo.

“So… after all these hours of taking photos, any that could be used for the holiday cards?” Felicity asked, putting her arms around Oliver’s shoulder from behind and looking at the screen.

“Well, if we wanted to be the crazy family with the weird holiday cards, we would have a pool of photos from which we could pick,” Oliver answered. “But since we’re not, I guess we are screwed.”

“We just had too much fun for a normal photo.”

“So what are we going to do now?” Oliver asked.

“Be the crazy family with the weird holiday cards.”

“I was hoping you would say that.

 

 

“This feels like Christmas Eve,” Felicity said, taking a nip of her tea, “or Hanukah.”

Oliver chuckled. How did he even have the breath to chuckle when doing handstand pushups? Felicity would barely get her arm to stretch again after bending them, and he was doing these pushups for several minutes now, all the while talking to her and even now he had the breath to chuckle.

“But you do realize that this is mainly a special night for me, right?” Felicity asked.

Again Oliver chuckled. “A special pre-holidays day for a special wife.”

“Can you keep chuckling?”

“Why?”

“You’re abs move, and that does things to me.”

Oliver answer was an amused chuckled, and Felicity rested herself further back into the cushions of the couch, mumbling, “Perfect.”

 

 

“You’re spoiling me,” Felicity said with a content sigh. “Yesterday you did the handstand pushups, today I get the massage. You should be careful. I might get used to it and insist that you keep spoiling me like this forever.”

“I love spoiling you,” Oliver answered quietly, moving his thumbs along her spine firmly, kneading out the tight knots there. “And who says that this is only for you?”

“In case you want me to massage you after this, I should warn you that you are turning me into jello here. You should stop before I don’t get to return the favor.”

“Don’t worry, I don’t want you to massage me,” Oliver replied, and Felicity could feel him shifting where he was sitting on the back of her thighs. When he spoke the next time, she could feel his breath ghosting over her skin.

“Felicity, do you remember what you said when I applied the massaging oil to your back?”

“That it smells nice?” Felicity asked in a whisper.

“Hm-hmm,” Oliver replied with a hum, and for a short second Felicity believed she could feel his lips against his back, but then the feeling was gone again. “Guess what? It tastes just as good.”

Felicity let out a moan when the tip of Oliver’s tongue moved over her back where his fingers had been shortly before. His hands moved from her shoulders down her arms to her hands. Their fingers entangled while his tongue kept tracing the route his fingers had taken before.

“I think this might turn out to be my favorite special day so far.”

 

 

For their ninth day Oliver had rented a whole ice rink.

As soon as Emmy caught sight of the ice, she insisted on skating on her own and no matter how much her parents tried to tell her that it was too soon for her to skate on her own, she wanted to at least try. So Felicity helped the toddler girl to put on the ice skates and helped her onto the ice.

While Emmy made her first attempts in ice skating with both of her hands holding on tightly to her mother’s fingers while Felicity was skating right behind her, helping her find her balance and holding her upright if she threatened to fall, Tommy stayed safely on Oliver’s arms. His little hands were fisted into Oliver’s jacket like he was afraid his dad could just let him down. His intensely blue eyes were focused on his sister, watching her like Emmy would probably watch him taking his first steps in a few months.

The entire day had been perfect but also so very exhausting that they fell asleep on the couch before they were halfway through their movie. And even when Oliver woke in the middle of the night, he didn’t wake his family or carry him upstairs. He just tightened his hold on them and went back to sleep.

 

 

“Hey, ready for lunch?”

“Lunch is cancelled.”

“Why is lunch cancelled?”

“Because I have to work,” Felicity replied, barely looking up from her tablet. “And before you ask, the reason I have to work and have no time for the lunch we planned last week is because you made me be late this morning.”

“You weren’t actually complaining,” Oliver replied with a slight smirk, but when Felicity shot him an angry glare, the grin died on his lips. “I am sorry.”

“You always are,” Felicity snapped.

“Wow!” Oliver replied. “What’s eating you?”

“Better question is what I am not eating thanks to the fact that I have to catch up on the preparations for my meetings tomorrow because my husband couldn’t keep his hands for himself this morning and-“

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered, leaning his head right next to hers.

As soon as her angry eyes were on him, he looked to his hand over their heads, making her follow his gaze. He could see from the corner of her eyes how the expression on her face softened, and when he turned his eyes back to her, he saw her smiling exhaustedly.

“What’s that?” she asked, not taking her eyes of his hand over their heads.

“A mistletoe to go,” Oliver explained.

“A mistletoe to go?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I thought that was something pretty special.”

“It is,” Felicity replied.

“And since we agreed not to fight, I thought now was the right moment to use it.”

Felicity smiled, put her hands to Oliver’s cheeks and pulled his head down to her, so she could kiss him gently.

“Thank you for this,” she whispered. “And sorry for my bad mood I am just snowed under with work and-”

 Oliver interrupted her with another kiss that made her known that there was nothing to apologize for.

 

 

“This is romantic,” Felicity whispered, leaning her head against his shoulder.

When she snuggled a little closer to him, Oliver immediately tightened his hold on her, wrapping the blanket more tightly around them and Emmy and pressed a kiss to Felicity’s cheek. His lips leaned against her ear when he whispered, “I thought some romance was just what you needed after all the work.”

“It is,” she replied.

They sat on the hood of their car. Oliver’s back was leaning against the windshield while Felicity was sitting in his lap with sleeping Emmy in her arms. The toddler had fallen asleep shortly after the first meteors had shown.

“We are almost halfway through this challenge,” Felicity whispered.

“I know.”

“I don’t want it to end too soon.”

“Neither do I.”

“Can’t we keep doing this forever?”

Oliver smiled against her neck and kissed the soft spot right under her ear before he whispered, “I don’t think it would be special if we did it every day. Besides, I would run out of ideas one day.”

“I guess we should make the best out of the days we have left then.”

“We should,” Oliver agreed with a short nod of his head and when Felicity shivered slightly, he rubbed his hands up and down her arms to warm her. “It’s getting cold. Do you want to go home?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh, snuggling a little closer to him. “Let’s stay here for a little while longer.”

“Okay.”

 

 

“Mommy, try this!” Emmy prompted, holding out the bowl with pasta salad out for her mother.

They sat on a blanket in the living room, surrounded by food for their indoor picnic. While Emmy was trying to make her mommy eat every food Oliver had prepared for this special occasion, Oliver let Tommy taste the first spoons of homemade pumpkin puree of a new recipe. And while Felicity felt like she couldn’t eat anymore, Tommy was all too excited about more food. He kicked his little feet happily whenever another spoon was pushed into his mouth.

“How much more am I supposed to eat?” Felicity asked with a groan, putting her hand to her stomach and rubbing it about the slight rounding. “See that? Mommy is already looking like she is having a baby.”

Emmy put the bowl with the pasta salad away to put her hands to Felicity’s stomach instead.

“Can we have another?”

Oliver and Felicity both chuckled and so did Tommy like he had completely understood what had been said.

“I think it is a little bit too soon for another baby,” Oliver explained. “Tommy is still so young.”

Emmy sighed in disappointment. “And for Christmas?”

“Maybe one day mommy will make me the present of another baby for Christmas.”

“But not this year,” Felicity added.

“But not this year,” Oliver repeated with a nod.

Again Emmy sighed. “Pity!”

 

 

“Emmy, you see that? A swan made of ice!”

“And a princess with a castle!” Emmy exclaimed, clapping her little hands.

While the toddler was hastily running away to see more of the ice sculptures, Felicity leaned into Oliver’s side, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“This idea was great. It’s amazing.”

Oliver chuckled. “Glad you like it.”

“I don’t like it. I love it!” Felicity replied. “Almost as much as Emmy does.”

“She just loves everything that glitters.”

“Well, and obviously it helps Tommy to sleep.”

Oliver and Felicity both looked down into the baby carriage and smiled when they saw their little baby boy sleeping soundly after he had been crying that long before that they had seriously considered not coming here.

Felicity was more than happy that they hadn’t missed this.

 

 

“You said we will do something special every day.”

“We are in the zoo. That is something special,” Oliver replied.

“It would be something special if we weren’t going to the kangaroos. You know I hate kangaroos!” Felicity whined, and Tommy released a cry in response, mimicking the tone of his mother’s voice. “Can’t we skip the kangaroos?”

“You can hide behind me if you want,” Oliver offered, and when Felicity only made a face, Oliver wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I’ll protect you.”

“That is the least I expect. And you are not allowed to make fun of me!”

“I am not sure I can do that.”

“Oliver!”

 

 

“Daddy, look,” Emmy interrupted Oliver’s whispered voice that he used to read out her favorite book.

Oliver put his thumb on the line he was reading and looked up. A smile spread on his face when he saw Felicity being asleep with her head resting on Emmy’s tummy. The toddler stroked her little hand over her mommy’s head gently.

“Mommy is the first to sleep,” Oliver stated. “Looks like I won that bet.”

“Are you going to end the story anyway, daddy?”

“Of course I will,” Oliver whispered, adjusting Tommy’s position on his chest. “I promised mommy that I would read until Tommy falls asleep.”

“Don’t sleep, Tommy,” Emmy whispered conspiratorially. “Daddy read us stories all night.”

And like always when his sister was talking to him, Tommy giggled delightedly.

“I guess we have a long night ahead of us then,” Oliver said with a smile.

He kissed the top of Tommy’s head, and when Emmy did the same for Felicity, he smiled, knowing that this was another precious memory for this year’s pre-holiday time.

 

 

“Are you going to explain to me why we are going shopping for our special something today?”

“It’s less about the shopping and more about the redo of something we did the last time we went shopping,” Oliver replied. He grabbed the first tight-fitting dress he could find and pushed the fabric into Felicity’s hands before he took her hand and pulled her to the changing rooms. “Try that on please.”

Felicity smirked. “I like the way you think, Mr. Queen.”

“Glad to hear that, Mrs. Queen.”

And it wasn’t until Felicity was trapped between Oliver’s chest and the wall with her legs wrapped around Oliver’s hips and his hard cock deep inside of her that she whispered, “Okay, I think this might be my new favorite special day.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied, nodding her head while stroking her hands through his hair. “It has this nostalgic aspect.”

Oliver smirked. “Time to bring the memories back to life, I guess.”

 

 

“What do we watch after this?” Emmy asked, taking a nip of her hot chocolate.

“How about we finish this movie before we start another one?” Oliver suggested.

Emmy nodded, taking another nip.

“I think I should get Tommy upstairs,” Felicity suggested, stroking her hand over Tommy’s back, “because as well as he works as a heating-pad, I think he will wake up soon.”

“I’ll take him to bed,” Oliver suggested, carefully sliding away from under Felicity and to the floor. When he lifted Tommy off Felicity’s chest, he whispered into the sleeping boy’s ear, “We’ll do another cuddle time in bed without any movies playing, okay? But for tonight it’s bedtime for you, buddy.”

 

 

“Wow, what did you do?” Felicity asked when she stepped into Emmy’s room and saw the colorful changes on one of the walls.

“Finger painting, mommy!” Emmy exclaimed, wiggling with her fingers that had finger paint all over them.

“Wow!” Felicity made, looking from Emmy to Oliver and finally to Tommy in his father’s arms. The little boy had color all over his face. “Did you also paint Tommy?”

“No!” Emmy giggled, taking her mother’s words literally. “He tried to paint.”

“Oh, he did?” Felicity asked.

“Yes, look!” Emmy said, putting her fingers around Felicity’s wrist and tugging her close to the wall where two small handprints could be seen. “That’s Tommy’s.”

“Wow!” Felicity made again. “That’s cool. Was that your idea?”

“No, daddy’s,” Emmy answered.

Felicity looked at her husband and cocked her head in question. Oliver only shrugged his shoulders in response.

“I thought finger painting the walls would be quite special.”

Felicity nodded. “It is.”

Emmy tugged at Felicity’s hand a little more firmly.

“Mommy, your hands, too!”

Felicity took off her blazer and nodded. “Okay, what color?”

 

 

For their nineteenth day Felicity was welcomed by Oliver who dragged a blanket along behind himself. Emmy was sitting cross legged on the blanket, Tommy lying on a pillow in her lap.

“What is this?” Felicity asked, dropping her blazer and stepping out of her high heels.

“Blanket Sledding!” Emmy exclaimed. “Tommy loves it!”

As if to prove his sister’s words right, Tommy laughed happily.

“Sit down, Mrs. Queen,” Oliver offered, gesturing to the blanket. “There is enough place for one more person to join the fun.”

“If you say so,” Felicity replied and sat down on the blanket next to Emmy. “I just hope you didn’t overtax yourself too much, Mr. Queen.”

Oliver cocked his head. “Emmy, I think you mom wants to offend me.”

“Mommy, daddy is strong!”

“You think so?” Felicity said, and when Emmy nodded affirmatively, she smiled even more. “Well, if you say so, it has to be right. Right?”

“Right! And now go on, daddy!”

 

 

“Thank God, our bathtub is that big.”

“I always imagined us doing family baths, and this something special every day seemed to be the right opportunity to do so,” Oliver replied, filling one of the syringes without needle with water and splashing the water into Emmy’s face.

“I know I said this a lot these last days already, but you made a pretty good choice again,” Felicity explained. “This is so much more fun than I thought it would be.”

“Well, it would be a whole different kind of fun if it was only us,” Oliver replied, eying up the short bikini Felicity was wearing, “without the clothes.”

“Speaking of, I might have something in mind for us to do tomorrow,” Felicity explained. Oliver perked his eyebrows, but she shook her head, whispering, “Leave this little surprise to me.”

So Oliver only nodded. And while Felicity was splashing water at Tommy, Emmy turned around in his lap and started licking drops of water off her father’s chest. When she pulled back, she was scrunching her nose.

“Daddy, you taste weird.”

“You think?” Oliver asked with a chuckle.

Emmy nodded seriously, turning around and looking at her mom. “You try, mommy.”

Felicity leaned forward over Tommy’s head and kissed Oliver’s chest. “Nope, not weird at all. Very yummy actually.”

She winked at Oliver, and he smirked, starting to tickle Emmy.

 

 

“Wow!” Oliver made when he stepped into the bedroom, seeing Felicity sprawled on the bed in some sexy lingerie he hadn’t seen her in yet. “Is that a new set?”

“It is,” Felicity replied.

She lifted her hand and made a come-here movement with her index finger. Oliver complied with the wordless request immediately, crawled onto the bed and settled on top of her. He took her hands and pressed them to the mattress over her head.

“That’s a nice surprise.”

“I thought the least I could do after all what you have done these last days was giving you some really good thank you sex.”

“I love thank you sex,” Oliver whispered, his hips lazily moving against hers.

“I know,” Felicity replied. “I love thank you sex, too.”

“Looks like a win-win for both of us.”

“Except for the kangaroos everything has been a win-win for both of us lately.”

“That might be true,” Oliver replied, “though I think that the kangaroos have not been that bad.”

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Do you want thank you sex?”

“Yes…?”

“Then shut up!”

 

 

“Wow! The tree is already decorated,” Felicity noticed when she stepped into the living room with Emmy sitting on her hip. “I thought you and daddy wanted to do that tomorrow.”

“Daddy was too excited.”

Felicity chuckled. “And you?”

“I did it for daddy.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied, knowing exactly that her toddler had probably been just as excited about decorating the tree as her husband had been. “Where’s daddy?”

“Upstairs. Tommy needs a new diaper.”

“Oh, he does?”

Emmy nodded. “And daddy wants to change him.”

“Into his pajama already? It is still soon,” Felicity replied.

But Emmy shook her head. “In pretty clothes. Tonight is a special night.”

“Oh really?”

Emmy nodded. “It’s Havana.”

Felicity chuckled.”I think you mean Hanukah. Havana is where Aunt Thea and Uncle Roy have been spending their last vacation.”

“Oh,” Emmy made, looking down disappointedly for not having gotten it right.

Felicity kissed her daughter’s cheek. “Let’s go see if daddy puts Tommy into good clothes, hm?”

“Okay!”

 

 

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered against his skin, snuggling her head more into the crook of Oliver’s neck. “These whole last three and a half weeks have been perfect.”

“Yes, they have been,” Oliver agreed with a nod.

He turned his head and kissed Felicity’s forehead, tightening his arms around his family. Emmy lay sprawled out on her daddy’s chest, her head on his shoulder and her curly hair tickling his face. Tommy rested between his parents, his fist tightened in Felicity’s shirt.

“It was a perfect pre-holiday time, right?” Felicity asked.

“More than perfect,” Oliver replied. “And it’s already your holiday, so I guess we had a good holiday start, too.”

“Yes, we did.”

Felicity watched the flames of the two candles on her menorah for some while, enjoying the warmth of her family being there. And so did Oliver. With the kids being soundly asleep it was easy to let sleep lull them in, too. But they fought their tiredness, wanting to enjoy every moment of what was left of their challenge.

“I wish we could just stay in this moment for longer,” Oliver whispered after a while and sighed. “With everyone coming over for Christmas there won’t be much time for moments like these those next days.”

“We should at least every now a let our family and friends participate on our life.”

“I disagree. I prefer keeping you all to myself.”

“You’re in sappy mode again,” Felicity replied with a chuckle.

“You love my sappy mode. If those last days have proven anything, then they have proved that.”

Felicity couldn’t argue with that. So she bent her head back to look at Oliver and said, “I love you.”

Oliver turned his head to look at her with a heart-warming smile. He leaned forward and kissed her gently before he replied, “I love you, too.”

And only after a few more hours of enjoying that they were here all together, Oliver and Felicity both fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to admit that this sounded a whole lot better in my head than it did when being written.


	102. Happy merry Christmas

He woke up to the even beating of her heart. It was his favorite sound in the world to wake up to, followed by the laughs of his children and her whispered voice in his ear. With a content sigh he snuggled the side of his face more against the skin of her chest, pressing a kiss to the soft skin right over the neckline of her top and breathing in the sweet scent of her skin.

Felicity stirred in her sleep, and her arms tightened around his head, keeping him snuggled to her chest. She pressed a kiss to the crown of his head, keeping her nose in his short hair for a few seconds before she rested her head back into the pillow and started stroking the tips of her fingers through his hair gently.

“This is nice,” Oliver murmured against Felicity’s chest, “so comfortable and quiet.”

“It is,” Felicity replied with a sigh.

They lay like that for quite some time, both on the edge of falling back to sleep. Felicity’s fingers kept playing with his hair while his ran from the hem of her shorts to her knee and back up again. It elicited goose bumps to spread on her skin, and Oliver smiled against her chest at the knowledge that this innocent touch alone was already enough to make her react like that. He could lie here like that all day without ever getting bored of the sound of her heartbeat or the way her skin felt under his rough skin, he thought.

“Mommy! Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!”

At the sound of their daughter’s voice ripping through the silence they both chuckled.

“And there I already started imagining what it would be like to lie here with you all day,” Oliver whispered against her skin, his voice sounding throaty from tiredness.

“You don’t really think that there will come a day that we can spend completely in bed anytime soon, right?” Felicity asked.

“Not as long as we aren’t getting rid of the kids,” Oliver replied with a sigh.

He lifted his head from her chest and moved up her body, so he could press his lips to hers for a kiss. It ended up being a really short kiss when Emmy ripped open the door loudly and came running in.

“Mommy! Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!”

“Morning, sunshine,” Oliver replied, sliding off of Felicity to the cold, unused mattress next to her and reaching out his arms to pull Emmy into bed for cuddle time.

But as soon as he had wrapped his arms around her waist, intending to pull her to his chest, she fought against his grip to get away from him. “Daddy, no!”

“Emmy, yes!” Oliver replied.

“Daddy, no! It’s Christmas!” Emmy exclaimed. “It’s time for presents now!”

“Really?” Oliver asked like he hadn’t known and looked at Felicity who buried her face in the pillow, hiding her laughter. “Are you sure it’s today and not… some other day?”

“Yes! I am sure, daddy!” Emmy replied, pushing his hands from her waist, so she could crawl off the bed. “There are presents downstairs!”

“There are?” he asked with wide eyes. “I don’t know… You might have only imagined presents being there because you want them so badly.”

“No, there are!” Emmy insisted, taking his head and starting to tug to get her daddy out of bed. “I’ll show you!”

“Okay,” Oliver agreed, letting the toddler pull him out of bed. “You show me the presents, and mommy gets Tommy ready.”

While being pulled out through the door, Oliver gazed at Felicity in question, wordlessly asking if that was alright with her, and she nodded. So he let Emmy lead him down to the living room where there were indeed a lot of presents. Of course there were! After Felicity had taken the kids to bed last night, he had personally placed them under the tree, taking care that everything was perfect.

Christmas in general was very important to Oliver, but this Christmas he really wanted to take care that every detail was perfect. After two tainted holidays because of his stupid reaction to Emmy calling each and every guy dada and Felicity’s depression in the last year this time everything had to be perfect this time, including the placement of the presents under the tree.

“Wow!” he said. “Santa got you a lot of presents this year.”

“And Tommy?”

“Tommy gets a lot of presents, too.”

“And mommy?”

“Mommy, too.”

“And you?”

“Me, too,” Oliver replied with a nod of his head, barely being able to suppress the amused smile about his daughter’s question. He went down onto his knees, kneeling in front of her, and put his hands to her tiny hips to pull her right in front of him. “But you know what’s daddy’s greatest present is?”

“A new baby?” Emmy asked hopefully.

A few weeks ago she had started to ask for another baby sibling. Obviously something about Tommy’s development had made her starting to think that he wasn’t a baby anymore, and hence she wanted another baby sibling.

“No, no new baby,” Oliver answered with a quiet chuckle. “It’s you and Tommy and mommy.”

“We’re not presents, daddy!” Emmy said with an amused giggle and put her hands in front of her face. “We’re not in gift wrap!”

“I could wrap you in some,” Oliver offered.

Emmy only laughed more, letting her head fall back into her neck and holding her tummy that probably hurt from laughing already. Oliver pulled her into his arms and started peppering her kisses with lots of kisses, chuckling when she shrieked for him to stop between laughter.

“Hey, are you having all the fun without us here?” Felicity asked when she came into the living room with Tommy in her arms. The little boy had his head rested on his mother’s shoulder, his little hand holding onto the neckline of her top. “You see that, Tommy? Daddy and Emmy are having all the fun without us.”

“No, we’re not!” Emmy disagreed, escaping her father’s arms and running to her mother instead. She reached out her hand for Felicity’s and pulled her closer to the presents. “Mommy, can we open the presents now already?”

“Each of you can open one present,” Felicity replied. “All the others will be opened when our guests are here.”

“Can I help Tommy unwrapping his present?”

“Don’t you want to open your own?” Felicity asked.

Emmy shook her head, her blonde curls jumping up and down. “First Tommy’s.”

“Okay then,” Felicity said, gesturing for Emmy to sit down, before she sat Tommy down between his sister’s spread legs, with his back leaning against her chest.

Felicity and Oliver both kneeled down beside them, so they could hand Emmy the presents.

When Felicity handed her daughter the first present, the toddler held it into Tommy’s reach and said, “Happy Christmas, Tommy.”

“It’s ‘merry Christmas’, sweetie,” Oliver explained to her.

“Happy merry Christmas, Tommy,” Emmy corrected herself, making both her parents chuckle.

When she started ripping off the paper, Tommy moved his hands in between hers and helped as much as his gripping and playing with the paper could be counted as helping. When the present was revealed, he grabbed the fabric with the white and orange strips and threw it away to get hold of the paper instead and lift it in front of his eyes with a delighted giggle like the paper was the best present he could have gotten.

“No, no, Tommy,” Emmy said, taking the paper away from him and handing him the abandoned fabric instead. “This is your present.”

Tommy made a discontent sound and reached his hands out for the paper again, but Emmy held it out of his reach.

“Emmy, please give it back to him,” Felicity told her daughter.

“But, mommy, the paper is not his present!”

“Well, if he likes the paper better, he can play with the paper.”

“But it’s not the present!” Emmy kept insisting though she handed her little brother the gift wrap. She lifted the present Tommy had discarded and took a careful look at it. Her eyes widened when she realized what it was. “Mommy! Daddy! It’s Nemo! Santa got Tommy a Nemo costume!”

Oliver smiled at Emmy, saying, “Santa must have known that daddy failed to get Tommy the right costume for Halloween.”

When the toddler looked away to inspect the costume more precisely, he winked at Felicity over their children’s head, and she mouthed back, “I love you.”

“Can we dress him into it, mommy!” Emmy pleaded. “Please, please, please!”

Chuckling, Felicity shook her head and took Tommy, who was still whining a little, away from his sister. “No, our guests are coming soon, and I want Tommy to wear the clothes we bought for him then. Come on, you can open your present now, and then we will all change and have breakfast.”

“Can’t Tommy putting on the costume be my present?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “You know, Tommy doesn’t like to be changed so often a day. Maybe he can sleep in the costume tonight. We’ll see. Come on, you can unwrap one of your presents and-“

“I’ll wait until Sara is here.”

“Really?” Oliver asked. “You were the one who wanted to open a present already.”

“I opened Tommy’s present. That’s enough,” Emmy replied, got up from the floor and headed to the door. “I’ll put on the new dress.”

Oliver and Felicity watched her leave and exchanged glances when she had reached the bottom of the stairs.

“Now she is pouting,” Oliver whispered.

“Lately she often pouts when she doesn’t get what she wants,” Felicity replied, getting up from the floor and pressing Tommy to her chest. “But in a few minutes she will find something else to be excited about, and everything will be okay again.”

“I wonder where she got that from,” they said at the same time and looked at each other, acting indignantly given the hidden accusation that was in the sentence, but, knowing that it was just a joke, they just laughed it off.

“I’ll go get Tommy dressed and change into something more appropriate for holidays, too,” Felicity stated.

“I think your outfit is very appropriate,” Oliver replied and chuckled when she looked down at herself and eyes up the short pajama she was wearing. She looked at him doubtingly, and Oliver winked. “I’ll cook breakfast.”

She had already walked to the door when she turned around once more and whispered his name. “Oliver?”

He turned around with the Nemo costume and the paper Tommy had also dropped in his hands and looked at Felicity. Her gentle smile warmed his heart.

“To quote our daughter,” she said, “happy merry Christmas.”

“Happy merry Christmas, Felicity.”

He gave her a meaningful look and Felicity chuckled, knowing exactly what he wanted to hear from her.

“I’m Jewish.”

“Happy Hanukah.”

Felicity turned around, chuckling slightly. Why did those words still make butterflies starting to flutter in her stomach?

 

 

“He looks sweet!” Emmy stated, leaning over Tommy and kissing his face. “Can he wear the costume forever now?”

Felicity and Oliver both chuckled.

“Well, I think we will have to wash it from time to time,” Felicity explained, “and Tommy still grows, so it probably won’t fit too long.”

“But he’s so pretty,” Emmy said, tickling his tummy and making him giggle.

Felicity chuckled once more. “Tommy is always pretty. He’s got his daddy’s eyes.”

“Daddy still has his eyes,” Emmy replied, chuckling quietly and lying down with her head resting on her brother’s tummy, and yawned. “Tommy should wear the costume forever.”

“For now he is only going to wear it tonight,” Felicity answered, but she wasn’t sure if her answer had been heard because Emmy’s eyes were already closed, her breath evened out.

The day had been a long day. With all of their friends and family having come here to celebrate the holidays it had also been an excited day. Neither Felicity nor Oliver was particularly surprised that Emmy had basically fallen asleep mid-sentence. During dinner her eyes had again and again fallen closed, but she had always opened them again, claiming to not be tired at all.

Oliver stepped behind Felicity and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against him. She rested her head back against his shoulder, and together they watched their kids sleeping on their bed, snuggled up to one another.

“This was a great day,” Felicity whispered.

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed, kissing her cheek. “And we have a few more nights of Hanukah to look forward to.”

“Right,” Felicity replied. She put her hands on Oliver’s on her stomach and turned her head to look at him. “I love you, you know that?”

Looking down at her, he mirrored her smile and replied, “I love you, too.”


	103. Who gets to kiss mommy?

The first thing Oliver heard when he stepped into the house was the sound of his daughter’s giggle, mixed with the delighted sounds his son made. He took in a deep breath, closing his eyes and harshly murmuring to himself in a whisper that was barely louder than a breath, “Pull yourself together!”

He strolled to the kitchen and put the bags of groceries to the kitchen counter, all the time reminding himself to take deep and even breaths like he had been reminded himself of that all morning. But it didn’t help the heavy feeling in his chest or the feeling of fear that he could still feel in his body. Still the pictures of his most recent nightmare were haunting him and trying to take all of his focus.

After all the years Oliver was almost used to terrifying nightmares. So often he had dreamed of being back on the island and being tortured again or of losing the people he loved. He had learned to deal with all the horrifying scenarios he had to live though in his worst nightmares by finding comfort in the warmth of Felicity’s body, the beating of her heart and the calming tone of her whispered voice.

But dreaming of holding Tommy’s cold, lifeless body in his arms, it had been more than he had been able to handle. He hadn’t been able to save him in his dream. And he had watched him die, just like he had watched his best friend die. One Tommy buried next to the other.

When his hands started shaking at the memory, Oliver pushed the groceries further onto the countertop, so they couldn’t fall to the floor, instead of putting them away and headed to the living room where he could still hear his kids. He pushed his still shaking hands into the pockets of his jeans on his way there. Instead of entering the room and joining his family on the couch, he just leaned into the doorframe quietly and watched.

Tommy was standing on Felicity’s thighs as much as they could call it ‘stand’ given that if Felicity wouldn’t be holding him against her chest, he would fall onto his little butt. Tommy loved standing like that. His hands were framing his mother’s face as he was pressing kiss after kiss to her lips. Kissing was another thing he had grown to love in the last days. Emmy was kneeling beside them, giggling about her brother’s behavior. Every now and then she pressed a kiss to her mother’s or brother’s cheek.

Felicity, Emmy and Tommy – they were his life. Without his family he was nothing. He could barely remember the dark times he had been through when his life had been about nothing but righting his father’s wrongs and saving the city. His life hadn’t really begun until he had let himself love Felicity and had started building a family with her. Losing one of them… the thought alone seemed unbearable.

“Hey, daddy’s back home!” Felicity suddenly called all attention on him, but Tommy just kept kissing her face, and so did Emmy.

“Whoa, what’s going on here?” Oliver asked, putting on a smile that he hoped was convincing, but looking into Felicity’s worried face, he doubted it.

“We’re kissing mommy,” Emmy replied between two kisses to her mother’s cheek.

“And who kisses me?” Oliver asked back.

“Meeee!” Felicity replied hastily, putting Tommy down in the cushions.

While Felicity hastily got up and ran towards Oliver, Emmy moved in front of Tommy to keep him in place and prevent him from falling down the couch when he made an attempt to turn around from his back to his tummy. Felicity’s arms wrapped around Oliver’s neck and her lips pressed to his, but Oliver didn’t close his eyes. He kept his gaze focused on his children, unable to give into the kiss completely as much as he wanted to. The memories of his last nightmare were still too present for him to relax into Felicity’s caress. He felt like if he just closed his eyes for a moment, he could lose them. And he couldn’t let that happen.

When their lips parted, Felicity stayed straightened up onto her tiptoes, their lips separated for barely more than an inch. He could taste the strawberry flavor of her lipstick on his lips and feel her breath ghosting over the skin of his face when she whispered as quietly as possible, so only he could hear, “Are you okay? You haven’t been in bed when I woke up.”

Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer. He pressed a kiss to her temple before he leaned his lips against her ear, whispering so only he could hear, “Nightmare.”

Felicity tightened her arms around her neck, gently moving the tips of her fingers through the short hair at the back of his neck. Her cheek snuggled against his, and Oliver leaned his cheek against hers, his stubble scratching her soft skin. Just like his lips touched her ear, her lips came resting against his.

“You didn’t wake me.”

No reproach. Just a statement.

Oliver took in a deep breath. He knew how important honesty and trust were to Felicity; just as important as they were to him. Usually when he had a nightmare, he woke her to tell her about what he had been dreaming of and what was burdening him and to then find comfort in her, but last night…

Last night he had woken from his nightmare in a blind panic he hadn’t experienced in a while. He had been sweating, and his breaths had come short. He had turned to his side to wrap his body back around Felicity’s since it had been all he had wanted after that horrible images had tainted his sleep, and he must have faced away from her at some time during his nightmare. But Felicity had been so peacefully asleep, he hadn’t been able to wake her with his trauma.

“Didn’t want to wake you,” Oliver whispered back. “I know you had a busy week.”

“Not that busy,” Felicity replied.

She pulled back, looking at him. One of her hands came to rest against his cheek, and immediately Oliver snuggled his face into the palm of her hand, closing his eyes for a short moment, before he whispered, “I’m sorry.”

Felicity shook her head, took his hand and led him back to the couch. She pulled Tommy onto her lap, and Emmy crawled over her mother’s thighs to sit on her father’s legs. Oliver put one arm around his daughter, the other around his wife and son. Breathing in the scent of her hair, he put his nose to the crown of Felicity’s head.

His family was here. They were all here with him. Everything was alright. While the insight slowly settled inside of him, he felt his chest easing and his mind and heart slowing down. There was no reason to worry. His family was with him. Everything was alright. They were all with him. His family was here.

Felicity always knew what he needed when his past tortured him. He should have waken her instead of leaving the bed and keeping himself busy all morning. And when he smiled this time, it was a real smile.

Being with his family always gave him some sense of peace. Having a wife and two children had seemed so far away only years ago, and now he had all of this. He had a perfect wife and two lovely even if exhausting children. They had turned his whole life upside down and changed it to the much better.

“I think we have to discuss something serious,” he said after a while. Felicity lifted her head from where it had rested on his shoulder and looked at him questioning. Smiling Oliver pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose, enjoying how she screwed up her whole face. “About New Year’s Eve.”

“We are going to celebrate with Uncle John and Aunt Lyla,” Emmy explained like she was telling her parents something completely new, putting her hands to her brother’s wrists and making him clap his little hands. The boy responded to it with a delighted giggle. Clapping his hands came right after kissing mommy in the list of things Tommy loved to do recently. “Sara and I will watch the firework together.”

“You will?” Oliver asked, cocking his head at the not yet three year old, and she nodded. “But it’s pretty late.”

Emmy shrugged her shoulders. “I’m almost three. I am a big girl now.”

“Right,” Oliver whispered, winking at her. “I almost forgot about that.”

“Daddy, you cannot forget!” Emmy stated with her arms akimbo. “You’re daddy!”

“Right,” Oliver only whispered again, nodding his head seriously as he was trying to suppress the amused grin that threatened to spread on his lips. “Sorry.”

Emmy made a face, but nodded shortly. Oliver had to bite his tongue to not burst out in laughter. The toddler was always trying to mimic her mother, especially when she tried to be serious, but her version of a loud voice was just adorable while Felicity’s could be quite frightening.

“So, what about New Year’s Eve?” Felicity asked.

“We gotta sort out who will kiss who on New Year’s Eve and-“

“I’m gonna kiss mommy!” Emmy exclaimed immediately.

“-and with sorting out I mean clarifying that I will kiss mommy which means that you, sweetheart, will have to pick someone else.”

Emmy made a pouty face. “But I wanna kiss mommy.”

“Nope,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, shaking his head. “Mommy is totally going to be my kissing partner this year.”

Last year they had spent New Year’s Eve apart. Due to the prenatal depression Felicity had been pushing Oliver away and told him to go celebrate with their friends while she would stay at home. He hadn’t known what had been going on with her then and had feared for his marriage to find a devastating ending. So the year before he had snuck into Sara’s nursery where Emmy had been sleeping and had kissed her when the new year had begun. This year it was Felicity he was going to kiss first.

“You could kiss Tommy,” Oliver suggested.

“He’ll be sleeping, daddy!” Emmy responded, rolling her eyes.

“Hm… You could also kiss Sara.”

“Sara’s gonna kiss her granny. Can I kiss granny?”

“Granny’s not coming for New Year’s Eve, sweetheart,” Felicity explained gently. “Grandpa is going to visit her.”

“Why’s granny not living here like Sara’s granny?”

“Because your granny has a job in Las Vegas and she has friends there,” Oliver explained, shooting Felicity a look when she whispered under her breath, “And because mommy would go insane if she lived here.”

Emmy sighed because, well, the life of a toddler really wasn’t easy. Oliver had to bite his tongue even harder at the dramatic expression that crossed the little girl’s face when she was thinking about who else she could kiss.

“Is Uncle Barry coming?”

“No, he is celebrating in Central City,” Oliver replied, trying to keep his tone light although the thought of Emmy kissing any other guy than him really didn’t make him feel good. She would start falling for boys soon enough! “How about you kiss Aunt Laurel?”

“No,” Emmy replied. “I wanna kiss mommy.”

“Not this year.”

Emmy already opened her mouth to reply when Felicity stated with a chuckle, “I never had people fighting over who gets to kiss me.”

“I’m gonna kiss mommy now,” Emmy announced, moving off from Oliver’s lap to kneel right next to her mother and kiss her lips gently. She giggled when she pulled away and licked her lips. “You’re lipstick tastes like strawberries.”

“I know,” Felicity responded with a smile. “Tommy loves that. It’s why he’s been kissing me all morning.”

As if to prove his mother’s words right, Tommy started laughing and his head fell back against Felicity’s breasts. When she lifted her eyes from her son’s face and looked at her husband instead, she found him staring at her lips intensely.

“Strawberry, hm?” he asked as if he hadn’t noticed the flavor of her lipstick before.

Felicity nodded, a bright smile spreading on her lips. “Wanna try?”

“Oh, yes! Try daddy!” Emmy encouraged.

Oliver leaned over, his lips moving over Felicity’s gently. He felt the bit of fear that had remained until now slowly fading away and his mind and body easing off. Because really everything was alright.

 

 

When the new year began two nights later, it was Tommy who got to kiss his mother first. He woke shortly before midnight and started crying. So Felicity lifted him into her arms and tried to rock him back to sleep, but neither the movement nor the soothing words she whispered into his ears seemed to help. So she carried him downstairs when she heard the others counting down the seconds to the new year.

She sat down in one of the arm chairs, holding Tommy in her arms. He stopped crying three seconds before midnight. And just when the first fireworks exploded at the sky and Oliver leaned down to kiss her, Tommy lifted his head from his mother’s shoulder and fisted his little hands in her hair which gave him more balance as he leaned his whole body against his mother’s chest and by the way ruined Felicity’s hair in the process. And he pressed his lips to hers, stealing her first kiss for the year.

“Hey, and who am I going to kiss now?” Oliver asked, still bent down, so his face was in one level with his son’s.

Tommy put his hand to Oliver’s lips and pushed him slightly away until he was out of reach. He then turned his head back to his mother and focused all his attention on kissing her again.

“Like father, like son,” Felicity chuckled against Tommy’s lips, glancing at Oliver.

“Wow, outdone by a six-month-old,” he grumbled in response. “And nobody there to kiss me.”

“I kiss you!” Emmy suggested, coming running from where she had stood at the window with Sara to watch the first fireworks already. “I kiss you, daddy!”

Oliver scooped the toddler up in his arms and smiled when she leaned forward, put her hands to his cheeks and pressed an open-mouthed kiss to his lips.

“Happy new-“

“Daddy, let me back down! I want to see the fireworks,” Emmy interrupted him impatiently, already trying to wiggle out of his arms, so Oliver put her back down to the floor with a chuckle.

He turned his gaze to Felicity, who held a now sleeping Tommy in his arms. It almost seemed like the little boy had only woken up to be the first to kiss his mommy this year.

“If he wasn’t so young, I’d ground him for not stealing the kiss that was meant for me.”

Felicity chuckled. “Tommy just loves kissing mommy.”

“Only boy I allow to love kissing you,” replied with a chuckle and finally kissed Felicity for the first time this year. “Happy new year, Felicity.”


	104. Can't please everyone

She should have stuck with being a stay-at-home mom! She could have worn her sweatpants all day, wouldn’t have to put any make-up on and could have taken a nap when the children were napping. Life had been so much more comfortable before she had decided to run Queen Incorporated!

With a deep sigh, Felicity started brushing her teeth while she was eyeing herself up in the mirror. Pale lips, dark shadows under her tired eyes and brittle hair made her look exhausted and probably like around ten years older. Okay, Felicity had to admit that maybe that was a little exaggerating, but she really did look terrible. She had worked so much the whole week that she definitely had to sleep in tomorrow. She had to-

“Mommy!”

Holding the toothbrush between the teeth of her lower and upper jaw, Felicity turned around just in time to see a crying Emmy running towards her. She scooped her up in her arms immediately and cradled her against her chest, worriedly stroking up and down her back. Emmy hid her face against her mother’s neck, and Felicity could feel her daughter’s tears on her skin.

A few months back she would have been very worried if that had happened, but she was still adjusting to her mother working now, and she did so by calling more attention on her, especially during the mornings before Felicity was about to leave. It didn’t last long most of the times. All Oliver and Felicity had to do was to remind her that she was the woman in the house when Felicity left and had to take care of the boys. She loved carrying responsibility.

“Hey, sweetheart,” she whispered as articulately as possible with the toothbrush still in her mouth, “what’s going on? What happened?”

“Daddy,” Emmy choked out between two sobs, tightening her arms around her mother’s neck to press herself closer to her chest.

Felicity frowned. Usually Emmy was palsy-walsy with her daddy. Just like Tommy was a real momma’s boy, Emmy was a real daddy’s girl. She and Oliver were always on the same page and always had been. Felicity couldn’t remember a time when Emmy had cried about something her daddy had done. She knew from what Oliver had told her that Emmy had cried shortly after Tommy’s birth when her toddler’s logic had made her believe that if mommy was with Tommy as her daddy had told her, she had to be in heaven, and hence she would never see her again.

Apart from that Felicity couldn’t remember any time that something Oliver had done – and even then it really hadn’t been his fault – had made their daughter cry.

“What did daddy do?”

 “He-“ Emmy started, but another sob escaped her lips, making it impossible for her to speak.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Felicity responded, gently keeping to stroke her hand up and down her daughter’s back to calm her down. “We’ll see where daddy is, okay?”

“Tommy’s nursery.”

Not caring to take the toothbrush out of her mouth, Felicity left the bathroom and headed to Tommy’s nursery. She hadn’t even stepped into the hallway when she could hear her son’s delighted laughter already. While he had cried a lot in his first months he had turned into a little sunshine by now. He loved clapping his hands and playing peek-a-boo, and he loved hugging and kissing, at least Felicity and Emmy.

He loved Oliver – of course he did! – but something about Oliver, probably the prickly stubble, made Tommy hesitating and often kept him from kissing his daddy.

Obviously not today, Felicity realized when she saw Tommy framing his father’s face with his little hands and kissing him. At least it looked like this was happening since with Oliver’s back being turned towards her she couldn’t say for sure.

“Hey,” she said, “what happened between Emmy and- Oh my god, what did you do?!”

Felicity had trouble to not drop Emmy at the sight she was met with when Oliver turned around. Her eyes widened like she would only get the right picture by doing so. She had to blink several time to make sure what she was seeing wasn’t a hallucination due to the little sleep she had gotten lately.

“What happened to your face?” she asked him, taking her toothbrush out of her mouth to gesture towards the lower part of his face with it.

Tommy rested his head against Oliver’s cheek, one of his hands stroking the other cheek, making Oliver chuckle.

“I thought I’d do Tommy a favor,” Oliver answered. “Without the stubble he likes me so much better than before.”

Felicity opened her mouth to reply, but found that she really didn’t know what to say about that. Of course without the stubble Tommy could show his love for his father so much more easily, so the choice of shaving must have been a really simple one for Oliver, and of course Felicity was happy that Tommy could now easily show his affection for his father, but-

“You don’t like it,” Oliver said.

“I wouldn’t exactly say it like that,” Felicity said carefully, adjusting Emmy, so the girl was rather sitting on her mother’s hip then being held in front of her. The toddler’s tears had dried by now, but her head was still resting on Felicity’s shoulder. “It’s just… different.”

Oliver cocked his head at her, perking his eyebrows in doubt. He just knew how much she loved the stubble. She loved moving her fingers through it when he was asleep or when they kissed. She loved how it scraped her soft lips when she pressed a kiss to his cheek or even his lips. She loved the way his stubble scratched the inside of her thighs when he was eating her out.

Felicity had to press her thighs together when the last thought shot through her mind. And given the smirk that spread all over Oliver’s face he knew exactly what she was thinking.

“So… the stubble will not come back?” Felicity asked.

“I want it back!” Emmy whined.

Felicity pressed a kiss to her daughter’s head before she whispered into her hair, “Mommy wants is back, too. I’ll talk to daddy about it. Do you want to go downstairs and have ice cream for breakfast?”

“Can I?” Emmy asked with wide eyes since ice cream for breakfast was usually not allowed unless she was sick and her throat ached.

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “Go comfort yourself about daddy’s stubble being gone for now.”

With a kiss to her daughter’s temple Felicity let her down on the floor, and immediately the toddler went running downstairs to get the delicious sweets.

“If I wouldn’t know that she’s my daughter and hence very creative when it comes to getting what she wants, I would wonder how she could reach the freezer,” Oliver mumbled, remembering all too well how before Christmas Emmy had gotten out of bed in the middle of the night and pushed a chair from the kitchen to the living room, so she could climb up the shelve and get to the box of Christmas biscuits. Not much had been missing for him to snap her neck, thinking she was an intruder.

Felicity only perked her eyebrow, waiting for Oliver to say something, while he was looking at her with pursed lips and Tommy kept moving his hand over his father’s bare cheek like he was still amazed the disturbing hair was finally gone.

“You really don’t like the stubble being gone, hm?” Oliver asked when Felicity continued to wordlessly stare at him.

“Like I said, it’s just… different,” Felicity claimed though her displeasure about the shave was audible in her voice. “Will the stubble stay… gone?”

“Will you keep staring at me like that for much longer if I say yes?”

“Maybe five to ten years,” Felicity replied. “I mean… I lived with the stubble so long, and it being gone now is…”

She gestured around with her toothbrush once more.

“Strange?” Oliver helped out.

Felicity nodded. She would have probably gone with ‘horrible’ or ‘unbearable’, but in a less dramatic way ‘strange’ worked, too.

“So… is it going to stay gone?” Felicity asked.

In a weird way the shaved look reminded her so much of how Oliver had looked before the island. She might never have seen him before he had come to her with the bullet-riddled laptop, but she knew from pictures she had seen in gossip magazines and old photo albums that hadn’t been burnt in the Queen Manor what he had looked like before the island. He looked younger but not in the good way. Actually when his hair would be only a little bit longer, he would probably look like the boy she had seen on a photo in Moira Queen’s office a long time ago. Although he had looked cute then, he had looked like a creep. At least a little bit.

“I’ll probably grow it back,” Oliver answered after a while.

“Although you won’t be in Tommy’s good graces any longer then?” Felicity asked, watching Tommy pressing kisses to his father’s cheek.

“Well, maybe he will get around to like the stubble if he can watch it grow,” Oliver replied, turning his head to Tommy who smiled at him and nuzzled his nose with Oliver’s.

“I wouldn’t count on that,” Felicity said with a small smile. “Our son is stubborn.”

“Yeah… but if I don’t have hope, I think the stubble has to stay gone.”

“In that case have a lot of hope, my dear,” Felicity replied with an amused grin.

She stepped forward, leaning against Oliver’s chest as she wrapped her arms around his waist. She pressed a short kiss to his lips, pulling away with her face being screwed up.

“It’s weird without the stubble, right?” Oliver anticipated her words before she could say them.

“Hm-hmm,” Felicity hummed affirmatively and nodded her head. “And I haven’t even looked at a cup of coffee yet.”

Turning around on her heels, she headed to the bathroom to get rid of her toothbrush before heading to the kitchen and get the urgently needed coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: I have the next chapter almost finished already. It will end in angst! I cannot say it often enough. Happy times are soon going to be over! We are going back to the angst! In case anyone wants to skip the angst or read it in one go once it is finished, I will post a chapter guide with every chapter, so you will see when it is save to come back.   
> Because we all know there will be happy times again if you just hold on. ;)


	105. Lover

“Where do you want me?”

The roughness of his modulated voice made goose bumps run down her spine and sent a jolt of pleasure right through her core. She loved his Arrow voice. It was one of the sexiest things if not the sexiest she had ever heard. She had developed a thing for it in her early days in the team already, but her desire to hear him talk to her with the modulated voice had slowly increased over the years, especially since the first night she had slept with him. His Arrow voice reminded her of how he sounded during and right after an exhausting first round of mind-blowing sex.

Oliver was a great lover as creepy as that word still sounded.

She smirked while she was thinking about how to answer her question.

“Preferably,” she started after a while, making a short pause to think about how to end her sentence by weighing her options, “in the bathtub. But I’d also be happy about the shower, the couch, the washing machine, the kitchen counter, the bed and everywhere else where we can have passionate sex all night lo-“

“Ugh! Really, Felicity, we do not need to hear that!”

“Oh, my god, Thea!” Felicity exclaimed embarrassedly, feeling a blush spreading all over her face. “I’m so sorry! I thought only Oliver’s line was open and-“

“No, mine is too,” Thea replied between clenched teeth.

“And mine,” John, Laurel and Roy added in chorus.

Felicity had never been more relieved that she sat safely behind her screens at home instead of being in the lair like she had used to before she had been a mother to two kids because luckily that meant that she wouldn’t even run into her sister-in-law or any of their friends when they returned from the mission. The embarrassment was barely bearable from here. She wouldn’t want to experience the embarrassment when she had to see any of them tonight and look into their eyes after what she had just said.

“I am going to… you know…” she said and hastily pushed a few buttons on her keyboard until only Oliver’s codename stayed at the upper right corner of her screen, telling her that all the other lines were definitely closed now. “God, that was embarrassing.”

Oliver chuckled. “You think? I thought it was hilarious.”

“Oliver, your sister and our friends just heard where and how I like to have sex with you.”

“I think they knew that from all the times they caught us having sex already,” Oliver just replied and chuckled again.

Felicity rolled her eyes. That man just had no shame.

“Are you at the location?” Felicity asked.

“Yes,” Oliver answered. “That is why I asked where you want me in the first place, but obviously you have imagined me saying that under different circumstances.”

“Maybe you should concentrate on getting to the backside entrance, smartass.”

“Awww, you always get pouty when I tease you,” Oliver replied with a chuckle before he asked way more seriously, “Can you give us access to the building? The door is locked which shouldn’t be a surprise.”

“Do you want to make me mad?” Felicity asked back, already typing away the right codes to get the lock of the warehouse to open. “Or why are you asking me if I can do that after all these years?”

“Oh, I would never try to make you mad,” Oliver explained with an audible smile in his voice. “I just want to make sure your thoughts aren’t otherwise occupied. You know, with the memory of how good it feels to have me inside you.”

Even through Oliver’s comm. Felicity could hear their friends groan about his words, and she grinned. How come that he could say such things without blushing although the others were right around him when Felicity felt like the ground would open and swallow her up although she wasn’t anywhere close to the inadvertently audience.

“The door should open… now,” Felicity announced.

“Worked,” Oliver whispered.

“I hope you didn’t doubt that.”

“I wouldn’t dare to. I don’t want to be kicked out of bed and have to sleep on the couch.”

Felicity opened a few different windows on her screens, showing her the blueprints of the building. The old warehouse had been altered a few months ago and the security had been upgraded. Adding the fact who owned the building and who the security cameras at the docks had caught on tape there, there was a high chance that the warehouse was used as a giant arsenal for all kinds of really dangerous weapons. That was why for the first time in a long time they had called everyone in instead of working in smaller teams that allowed everyone to have more time for their private lives.

Usually it would have been one of those occasions that would make her go to the foundry, too, and use the computers there, but with everyone being in the field and Lance having to work, there was nobody to take care of the kids which was a lucky coincidence given what had just happened on the comms.

She took in a deep breath, pushing the thought away, before she said, “I’d recommend Arsenal and Black Canary, you-“

“You have to open the others’ lines again,” Oliver interrupted her.

“Right,” Felicity murmured.

 “And you know that with everyone listening you should not think about what we are doing when I am back home and-“

“Lines are open now,” Felicity interrupted him, biting down on her tongue.

“Please no sex talk,” Roy grumbled before Felicity had said anything.

“No sex talk,” Felicity swore. “Just serious talking about what to do and where to go and-“

“Hopefully before the bad guys come by,” John interrupted her.

“Right,” Felicity said once more, taking in another deep breath. Today just wasn’t her day. “Okay, so Arsenal, and Black Canary, you take the right path. Speedy, Spartan, you take the left, and Arrow-“

“Right through the middle.”

“You take the words right out of my mouth.”

The next twenty minutes Felicity pushed every thought that might distract her from the current mission out of her mind. As much as she often lost her focus in a babble, she always gave her best when it was really needed. She was a little tense, but she always was when she could only listen over the comms how the team fought. She knew their abilities, but it still made her nervous.

Her mind only eased off when the noises on the other side of the line stopped, and Laurel announced, “I call my father and-“

“Captain Lance is already informed,” Felicity interrupted her. “You should probably hurry back to the lair because your presence will be needed in civil clothes.”

“Understood.”

“Arsenal and I will take up position at the roof of the building next to this,” Speedy stated, “and wait for the police to get the guys. Spartan, Arrow, you can head home.”

“I like the sound of that,” Oliver responded. “I think Overwatch and I still have some plans for the rest of the night.”

“Ugh!” everyone made.

“How come you-?” Felicity started, but interrupted her question when she saw a movement from the corner of her eye.

She cocked her head at the sight of her daughter who held her pink giraffe under her arm and walked through the living room to the couch where she sat down and just looked at her mother with big blue eyes.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked when Felicity didn’t continue.

“Someone who looks suspiciously similar to our daughter just came downstairs,” Felicity answered, not taking her eyes off the little girl on the couch. “Emmeline Harper Queen, what are you doing down here in the middle of the night?”

“Can’t sleep anymore,” the toddler answered with a yawn. “Can we play a game?”

“We are going to play the mommy-is-going-to-take-Emmy-back-to-bed-game,” Felicity replied.

“I don’t like that game. Can we play something else?”

“No, it’s bedtime. Mommy’s going to bed now, too.”

“Can I sleep in your bed?”

Felicity shook her head. “No, when daddy comes home, he and mommy have adult things to do in our bed.”

“Oh my god!” Roy groaned.

“Can you please switch off these damn comms?” Speedy asked at the time.

John and Laurel only chuckled.

“Oops,” Felicity made, feeling another blush spreading on her face. “Okay, I am switching them out now.”

“See you at home, Overwatch,” Oliver said and although his voice was still modulated, she could hear the smirk in her voice that only made her roll her eyes.

“Did you talk to daddy?” Emmy asked.

Felicity nodded. “He is already on his way back home.”

Closing all the lines and switching off the system, she put the headset away and got up from her chair to approach Emmeline. The little girl was still sitting on the couch, almost asleep already. Her eyes were barely open and when Felicity lifted her from the cushions into her arms, the toddler’s protest was a small one.

“I’m not tired,” she said with a yawn, snuggling to her mother’s chest.

“Yes, you are, sweetheart,” Felicity replied, gently stroking her hand up and down her daughter’s back. “I’m gonna put you to bed now, and when daddy comes home, he will come looking for you and give you a goodnight-kiss, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh.

Felicity smiled. She knew Emmy would be soundly asleep before she had even reached the head of the stairs, and she wouldn’t wake up even when Oliver would kiss her goodnight later which meant that just like planned there was some time for adult stuff, she thought with a smirk.

 

 

Oliver couldn’t stop smirking. He had been smirking on his way from the warehouse to the foundry, and he was smirking now that he was on his way home to Felicity.

Maybe it was a little weird to still be so excited about sex after all these years, but… not really. And it especially wasn’t weird today because today had been such a good day – the morning and afternoon with the kids and the night out on a successful mission – that sex with Felicity seemed like the perfect end to it. And given that she had probably had an exhausting day at work he was sure she would appreciate some relaxing sex to conclude the day, too. Besides, now that his stubble had grown back, he was sure that Felicity would appreciate feeling it rub against the inside of her thighs again.

Since she had listed all the places she would like to have sex with him, he hadn’t been able to completely focus on anything but the possible scenarios of them having sex - in the bathtub and the shower, on the couch, the washing machine and the kitchen counter, in the bed and everywhere else where they could have passionate sex all night long as Felicity had said. And the thoughts had made him fight even harder because all he had been able to think about had been how the sooner the fight was over and he could be home, the sooner he could bury himself deep into Felicity’s hot, wet core.

God, he just loved sex with her!

He parked the car in the garage and hurried to the front door impatiently, sending a silent prayer to heaven that the kids were still asleep or in Emmy’s case asleep again.

Oliver opened the door and stepped into the entrance area. Everything was dark around him. Felicity had probably gone to bed already. Hopefully she was waiting for him, sprawled out on the mattress. Locking the door behind him, he glanced around the corner into the hallway to see that there was still light in the living room. So maybe she was waiting for him there instead of upstairs in their beid. That would luckily give him the chance to carry her upstairs, probably while kissing her and maybe even taking off some of her clothes already.

His smirk widened when he let his keys fall into the small bowl on the table next to the door and took the first step through the darkness. He hadn’t put his whole weight on his other foot yet when he froze in place at the noise that came from whatever it was under his foot that scraped over the hardwood floor when he moved. He had stepped onto one of the kids’ toys so often by now he knew what it sounded like and what it felt like, no matter what toy it was. Whatever he was stepping on was no toy, though.

Slowly Oliver’s eyes adjusted to the dark. He looked down to the floor and saw lots of shattered pieces of glass on the floor. His hand moved out to the light switch immediately. He turned around, forcing his eyes to stay open although the sudden light was dazzling him and making it hard to see anything.

He felt his heart stop beating and his blood run cold. In his mind he screamed at himself to move and find out what had happened and whether his family was safe, but Oliver was still frozen in place.

All the nightmares he had had were playing in his head like a movie.  
He relived all the nightmares he had had about Felicity dying – the times he had held her lifeless body in his arms and the times he had just known she had been dead although they had never found her body.  
He remembered all the time he had dreamed about Emmy dying – whether it been accidents like running in front of a car or falling down the stairs or because someone from his past or present had taken her from him.  
And Oliver relived the dreams of Tommy’s death – the most recent one from only a few days ago, when he had held Tommy’s little body in his arms and cradled the dead boy to his chest.

He had made so many enemies. So many people hated him.

And he had lost so many people because of that already.

He couldn’t! He couldn’t lose them! He couldn’t lose either of them!

“Felicity!” he yelled.

When his body was finally able to move again, Oliver started running. He ran to the open door at the end of the small hallway to find a destructed mess where only hours ago had been a maybe slight messy living room. Some of the furniture had been displaced, others like the couch table destroyed. The series of photos that had always had its place on the mantelpieces had been flung to the floor, scattered pieces of the frames were covering the floor.

“Felicity?!” Oliver called out again, turning on his heels and running back.

He ignored the mess of scattered glass that the photo frames that had been placed on the wall before where they had reminded of the happiest days of his life had left on the stairs when they had violently flung down. Even some of the nails he and Felicity had been driving into the wall when they had moved here and created the wall of memories had been ripped off the wall.

“Felicity?!” he yelled her name once more, ripping open the door to their bedroom to find a similar chaos left there.

He felt the little air he had left before leave his lungs. He was hyperventilating and so close to fainting that he saw black spots dance in front of his eyes. Fainting. That was what he did when something unbearable happened. It had happened when Shado had died and when his mother had died, and he felt himself close to losing consciousness now. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t lose consciousness. Not until he had found them.

“Felicity?!”

He hurried to Emmy’s room, finding it not as badly destroyed as Felicity’s and his bedroom, but still left in chaos. The doors to her wardrobe had been left open. Part of her clothes was missing, while others had been abandoned on the floor. The photo they had taken during their Christmas challenge that had been placed on the small table next to her bed ever since had been flung down, just like all of the other photos in the house seemingly had been.

“Felicity?!”

He stopped at the door to Tommy’s nursery. The door had been kicked in. Tommy’s crib had been tossed through the room and overturned. Items from the changing unit had been thrown around. And in the middle of the chaos of broken furniture, ripped fabrics of curtains, blankets and clothes something caught Oliver’s attention.

Slowly he stepped through the mess in his son’s room and lifted what was left of the rocking chair to find Emmy’s pink giraffe buried under all this mess on the floor. His hands were shaking when he lifted the stuffed animal to his chest and pressed it close to him.

What the hell had happened here?

Where were they?

Were they okay?

They had to be okay! He couldn’t let himself-

When he felt the vibrating of his phone in the back pocket of his jeans, he hastily reached out his hand and looked at the display, hoping to read Felicity’s name on it. His hope crushed when he saw an unknown number instead.

Forcing in a deep breath that his lungs seemingly tried to fight taking in since it was unbelievably hard to suck in the breath, he took the call and pressed the phone to his ear. But he didn’t say a word. He just concentrated on what he heard on the other side of the line. If the worst case would come true and his family had indeed been taken, he needed to remember every detail of this phone call because an unknown number calling and this just couldn’t be a coincidence. Whoever this was had something to do with the destruction around him.

But nothing could be heard. For what felt like an eternity but was probably just a few seconds everything was silent at the other end. He was just about to say something and threat whoever was torturing him with the silence like the sight of his home being destroyed and his family being missing wasn’t enough of a torture for him to take when a voice he hadn’t heard in a while and that he had hoped never to hear again said,

“Hello, lover.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s the chapter guide I promised you. “Heartbeat” is the first chapter you should read when you want to skip the angst or read it in one go once it is over I’m gonna keep reblogging it until it’s over. 
> 
> Left behind  
> Allies  
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations  
> Deperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	106. Left behind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You should read chapter 105, "Lover", before this.

“Hello, lover.”

The voice made a cold shiver run down Oliver’s spine like the sound of chalk scraping over a board. His hold on his phone tightened when he closed his eyes for a short moment to regain some of his self-control. He pressed his lips together tightly, trying to keep himself from yelling at the person on the other side of the line.

He remembered the last time he had met her. Taking the dangerous encounter with her aside, it had been one of the happiest days of his life. But he hadn’t forgotten how close he had been to losing Felicity when that night had been supposed to only be about his daughter’s birth. Instead he had been running around saving the city and almost lost the most important people in his life. If it hadn’t been for Roy, Felicity might have died and Emmy might have been taken.

Because of Carrie Cutter aka Cupid’s crazy plan to force his love by killing Felicity and becoming the mother of his daughter herself.

“Did you miss me?”

Oliver tried to answer and tell her what he knew she wanted to hear, but the words her shrink had told him years ago how Cupid would feel if someone lied to her came to his mind and stopped him from saying anything. He couldn’t lie to her, and he couldn’t tell her the truth. Both would endanger the people he loved.

So Oliver just stood there, waiting for her to say something more.

“I know it’s been a while,” she continued when Oliver stayed silent. “Unfortunately your friend in red leather got in the way the last time I tried to prove to you that I am the right woman to be at your side. I am strong. We use the same weapon. You saved my life.”

“All of that is the Arrow,” Oliver said, not missing that his voice sounded hoarse.  

“Don’t try to fool me, Oliver,” Cupid said sharply. “I know you and the Arrow are the same person.”

Oliver pressed his lips together once more, wordlessly cursing himself for denying that he was the Arrow in the first place. Cupid knew that he was the Arrow. He didn’t know how she knew or when she had learned, but he knew that she knew.

And she had known for a while. Even when Cupid had shown up in the hospital while Felicity had been in labor almost three years ago, she had known. Actually she had been in the hospital _because_ she had known and because she had thought that if she killed Felicity and raised Emmeline as her own child, making the little girl believe she was her mother, Oliver would have no chance but to be with her if he wanted his daughter back.

He pushed the thoughts out of his mind. He couldn’t think about this now.

Back then Roy had gotten back to the hospital in time to save Felicity from getting killed and Emmeline from being violently cut out of her mother’s womb and being abducted before ever meeting her father.

And whatever had happened tonight, Oliver would personally take care that his family was coming back safe. To do so he had to concentrate. He had to concentrate on what was happening right now. He couldn’t get lost in the dark memories that haunted him during his worst nightmares.

“We can be a family now,” Cupid stated after a while, her anger about his denial seemingly forgotten. “The burdens of the past can be forgotten, and it is just going to be the three of us. Just you and me and Oscar.”

Just the three of them. Three.  
Why three? Why not four?

Cupid would kill Felicity. As gut-wrenching as that thought was, Oliver wanted to get his family back and to get them back he didn’t only have to concentrate, but he had to stay realistic. And realistically Cupid had no use for Felicity.

But what about Emmeline?

Years back her plan had been to get to him through Emmy.

Why not this time?

Unless Emmy was already dea-

No. He refused to believe that. There was a difference between being realistic and pessimistic. He couldn’t be pessimistic. It would… destroy him.

And Tommy? Tommy was probably Oscar. He remembered that Cupid’s father had been named Oscar. Renaming Tommy to create more of a connection between the two of them made sense, realistically speaking. If Cupid’s vision could be seen as realistic at all.

“We should meet,” Oliver suggested hurriedly. “If it’s only the three of us-“

A cry he would recognize even if mixed with a thousand other sounds could he heard on Cupid’s end of the line.

“Tommy,” Oliver whispered barely audible.

Tommy was alive. He was alive.

“I gotta go. Our son needs my attention. You will hear from me soon, lover.”

“Wait-“

She had already hung up. Still Oliver stood in the middle of his son’s destroyed nursery and held the phone to his ear like he could miss anything that would help him get his family back. And still he held the pink giraffe pressed to his heart.

One of his worst nightmares had come true.

His whole family was missing. And he had no idea if Felicity and Emmeline were even alive.

He should have asked for them, shouldn’t he have? He should have asked if they were alright, too, and where they were. Well, they had to be with Cupid. If Tommy was with Cupid, then Emmy and Felicity had to be, too.

Oliver felt like paralyzed. He knew that he was thinking too much. The thoughts were actually running wild in his head.  Unnecessary thoughts were running wild in his head. He couldn’t keep thinking that slowly and…  
He couldn’t keep thinking at all.  
He was drowning in his thoughts.

But if he didn’t drown in his thoughts, the giant ache in his chest would eat him alive.

He just knew it.

And he also knew that he couldn’t allow himself feel what he knew he should be feeling.

Because if he fell apart now, his family would be lost.

He couldn’t let that happen. He needed them back. And once they were all back in his arms he could allow himself to fall apart and let in all the feelings he was pushing down and away from him now. But not before they were all back safe.

Slowly he lifted the pink giraffe to his nose, inhaling the scent Emmy’s skin had left on the plush when she had held it to her neck like he had seen her doing so often. He closed his eyes shortly, pretending that Emmy and Tommy and Felicity were all right here in his arms for just the break of a second. Until Oliver felt the ache in his chest growing at the knowledge that they weren’t here and if he opened his eyes, he wouldn’t see them. Because no pretending would bring him back.

Oliver clenched his jaws, lifted his phone and picked the second number on the speed dial.

He had to do something. As paralyzed as the shock made him feel still, Oliver knew that he had to do something. He couldn’t just stand here and let his fear of losing the people he loved most keep him from saving them. He had to-

“No need to update me on your sex life, Ol-“

“Felicity, Emmy and Tommy have all been taken,” Oliver interrupted his friend. “Carrie Cutter, Cupid, called me and told me that we could be a family now. She has at least Tommy. From what she said it sounded like she has only taken him, but given that Felicity and Emmy are missing, too, and it would be a strange coincidence if-“

“Hold on a second,” John said. The teasing tone of before was suddenly gone. “They have all been taken?”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath. “Yes. The house is a complete chaos and-“

“Stay where you are. I’m gonna call the others, and we’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“Thanks, John,” Oliver whispered.

“Felicity, Emmy and Tommy are family, Oliver,” John said firmly. “And if someone took them, there is nobody on the team who wouldn’t move heaven and hell to help get them back. Stay where you are. We’ll get there as soon as we can.”

When John hung up, Oliver let the phone sink and pressed the giraffe even closer to his nose, breathing in Emmy’s scent once more.

“I’m gonna find you,” he whispered. “I am going to find all of you.”

 

 

It didn’t even take fifteen minutes until the whole team had come together at Oliver’s house. Thea had immediately flung her arms around his neck and told him how sorry she was and how they would get them back and other things he couldn’t remember because he hadn’t been really listening.

He had only glanced at John shortly who had nodded like they had been sharing a secret. But it had less been a secret than just a wordless assurance – that no matter what Oliver would feel was necessary, John would have his back.

After everyone had shot a glance at the chaos Cupid had left in the house, Oliver had told them everything that had happened since the moment he had stepped into the house. His thumb was nervously rubbing against the fingertips of his other hand. He felt the need to do something. He wanted to grab his bow and find out where the hell they were. He wanted to beat up every criminal there was out there in his city to find out where Cupid had taken Felicity and the kids.

But he knew if he wanted to have any chance at finding them, he would need the support of the whole team. And for their support he needed them to know everything he knew. They needed a plan, one that included all of them in the field, doing whatever it was they needed to do to find his family.

Whatever paralysis the shock had made him feel before was replaced by they need to act now. He needed to do something. He couldn’t just stand here and talk. His family was in acute danger, and he needed to use every second he had to save them. He needed to get them back. He needed to find them.

“We just needed to find them,” Oliver said out loud.

“We will, Oliver,” John replied firmly, no doubt audible.

“Did you call Lyla?” Laurel asked, looking at John. “If Cupid has escaped A.R.G.U.S., she would know and would have told us.”

“Lyla is on a mission, God knows where,” John explained. “I tried to call her ten times already, but she didn’t pick up. So I called the headquarters and told them that there is an emergency and that she has to call me back immediately. Nobody wanted to give me any information on whether or not Cupid-“

“She has escaped,” Oliver interrupted his friend, his hands forming to fists next to his body. “Cupid has escaped. She has taken Felicity, Emmy and Tommy. And every second we spent here talking instead of being out in the field is-“

“We need a plan,” John said the words Oliver had thought before.

He knew in the back of his mind that they needed a plan, but sitting down and making plans was not what he needed right now. It was not what he felt he had to do. He had to be out there searching for them. He needed to-

The ringing of a phone made Oliver reach out his free hand for his phone in the pocket of his jeans. His other hand only held on more tightly to Emmy’s pink stuffed giraffe. It wasn’t his phone that had been ringing, though.

“It’s my dad,” Laurel stated, looking up from the display of her phone to look at Oliver questioningly. “Should I-“

“No,” Oliver replied hastily. “The less people know, the better.”

“Ollie, maybe-“

“No,” he interrupted his sister. “If Quentin knows, then so will Donna. She has the bullshit sensor Felicity has inherited. She will figure out something is wrong. I don’t want her to know.”

The thought of Donna’s reaction to learning that her daughter and her grandchildren had been abducted made Oliver’s stomach twist painfully. He knew what it felt like if your child was missing. He experienced it right now. He didn’t want to put Donna through this, too. He wanted to spare her the pain he hadn’t been spared of.

Besides, Donna knowing could endanger their family’s safe return. She would push to call the police that wouldn’t be able to do anything to help against Cupid. And she would want to know why a crazy woman who called herself Cupid had abducted Felicity and the kids. Donna knowing just would be more of a distraction than a help. So she couldn’t know.

So nodding understandingly, Laurel left to take the call, while John said, “Okay, everyone look around if there is anything to find in this mess to give us a clue about-“

“We should go out in the field,” Oliver grumbled.

John gave Thea and Roy a look, and the two of them went upstairs to do what John had suggested.

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest, pressing the pink giraffe close to his heart. He didn’t want to hear what his friend had to say. He wanted to be outside and find out where his family was. He wanted them back for God’s sake!

“Blindly hitting the streets is not going to get them back any sooner, Oliver,” John stated calmly. “It’s probably only going to take more time.”

“But we have to do something,” Oliver whispered. “My whole family has been taken. They are in danger and they could be anywhere in the city, so-“

“So we should try to eliminate some of the possibilities before hitting the street.”

“Even if we eliminate half of the possibilities, there are still too many places they could be.”

It was hopeless. They could be anywhere in or outside the city. If Cupid had taken them right after he had ended his phone call with Felicity, she had had almost an hour until he had returned and another twenty minutes from that until now. They could be far outside of Starling already.

How were they going to find them?

The only one on the team who would be able to really eliminate any possibilities of places with magically hacking her way around the world wasn’t here. The only one on the team who would be able to find Felicity and the kids was Felicity herself.

Without her they were left no choice but blindly hitting the streets until they found something. And the sooner they started, the sooner there would be a lead they could follow.

“I think we need help,” John stated calmly, though the tone of his voice did betray him. He was scared, almost as scared as Oliver was. “I think as long as I can’t get Lyla on the phone, we should-“

“Oliver?!”

At Thea’s shout out both, Oliver and John, ran upstairs, following her voice to the master bedroom.

Oliver’s heart was racing in his chest once more, mostly fearing what his sister had found. Yet there was some hope of what his sister might have found. He had no idea what it could be. His thoughts were too occupied by trying to ignore the growing pain in his chest, the feeling of emptiness and darkness that tried to soak him in.

Thea’s face was pale, almost white. Roy stood by her side, his eyes wide and his jaw clenched.

Oliver felt his heart stop beating mid-race at the sight. Whatever they had found, it couldn’t be good. It really couldn’t be any good.

How could anything but finding Felicity and the kids be good in this situation?

So whatever they had found was probably more horrible than just not good.

“What is it?” he asked barely audibly.

“Blood,” Roy answered. He gulped hard.

John moved away from Oliver’s side to Thea and Roy, his eyes following their gazes to somewhere on the floor next to the bed Oliver couldn’t see. He watched his friend crouch down and eye up the suspicious find. Oliver didn’t realize how his grip on the pink giraffe tightened subconsciously as he felt slowly growing closer and closer to falling apart.

Blood. If there was blood, it meant that somebody had gotten hurt. At least.

If Cupid or anyone else had hurt his family, not only taken them but physically harmed them, he would lose whatever sanity there was left in him at this moment.

“John,” Oliver whispered.

“It’s definitely blood. And depending on how much blood there is here, it was more than just a slight scratch. We will need help finding out whose blood it is, though. And that brings me back to what I’ve been meant to say before-“

“I called Cisco,” Laurel said when she stepped into the bedroom now. “I thought with Felicity missing, we would need a computer genius to help us find her, and he was the first person to come to my mind.”

“Call him again and ask if Caitlin can join him,” John asked.

“Barry and Caitlin will both join him.”

“They will?” Oliver asked.

He didn’t miss how his voice barely sounded like himself or how his voice seemed to tremble. Neither did he miss that all he did was standing there helplessly and stare as he didn’t feel able to move and barely got out a sound. Even breathing was hard.

“Of course they will,” Laurel answered, stepping next to him and putting a comforting hand to his shoulder. “Felicity is their friend. They love her and the kids. Barry even is Tommy’s godfather. They dropped everything the second I said they were missing.”

When anything like this had happened years ago, it would have been only him. He wouldn’t have anyone to help him because he had never intended on doing all of this with anyone’s help. But he probably wouldn’t even have a family to get kidnapped if he were still doing everything on his own.

Oliver shook his head. He couldn’t be thinking like this. He couldn’t think like this.

“We will hit the streets.”

“Oliver-“

“No, John,” Oliver interrupted him, shaking his head. “I can’t sit here and do nothing. Barry, Caitlin and Cisco and on their way. Good. But as long as they aren’t here, I am not going to sit around and wonder if my family will already be dead by the time they arrive or whether they are dead already. There might not be any leads, at least none that we found yet. So we will go out there and find something to go after and-“

“Okay,” John replied with a nod. “Everyone head to the lair.”

When Oliver already turned around on his heels, John held him back. He waited until Laurel, Thea and Roy had left before he said gently, “I know you’re hurting, man. And I know you’re scared and angry. And you know I will have your back no matter what, but don’t lose what made Felicity fall in love with you in the first place.”

That being said, John stepped out of the bedroom, leaving Oliver alone.

He lifted the pink giraffe to his nose again, once more inhaling the scent his daughter’s skin had left on the toy.

John was right. He couldn’t lose who he had become.

But that wouldn’t stop him from finding them.

And if he had to be a little more insistent than he usually was, then that didn’t mean that he had lost who he had become. It only meant that he was determined on his goal.

He had to find his family. He had to find out where they were.

 

 

Felicity sighed contently, waking up to Oliver’s arm being lazily wrapped around her waist and his chest pressing into her back, warming her. Smiling, she pushed back against him, snuggling closer to borrow more of his warmth. Or maybe she was stealing it, given that she was not intending on giving it back unless it would end in slow, gentle morning sex and-

The moment she smelled him – not Oliver but _him_ – was the moment she remembered at least part of what had happened, blurry pieces out of context, and it felt like a punch right into the face.

She tried not to move. She tried not to grow completely rigid in his arms. He shouldn’t know that she had woken up, or that she didn’t want to be here. Not as long as she hadn’t figured out _everything_ that had happened. She just needed to put together the pieces of memory that were playing in front of her eyes right now.

She had been at home, talking to Oliver over the comms while he had been on a mission. Well, technically they both had been on a mission since she had talked the team through and… it didn’t matter right now. What mattered, though, was that she remembered how Emmy had come downstairs, wanting to play a game, but Felicity had put her back to bed. That was the part she could remember clearly.

But what exactly had happened then?

Right, she had gone back downstairs to put away the glasses on the couch table, the toys the kids had left on the floor and switch off the lights. She remembered hearing something and thinking it was Oliver. She had looked up and her heart had skipped a beat when she had seen Cupid staring back at her instead.

Cupid had said things, things Felicity had barely heard over her thoughts running wild about what to do and how to get to her children. She hadn’t forgotten how Cupid had tried to cut Emmy out of her womb three years ago, and how easily she could have killed the both of them with it. So saving her children had been everything she had wanted at that moment.

Emmy and Tommy.  
Where were they?  
Were they here?  
Were they hurt?  
God, they had to be so scared!

Felicity took in a deep breath, trying to be as silent as possible to not get caught having woken up. She couldn’t panic. She needed to concentrate on figuring out what had happened. Cupid had been at her home. So how had she ended up in _his_ arms? And where were Emmy and Tommy?

She had run. Somehow she had managed to get past Cupid and run upstairs. Cupid had followed her, but not as quickly as Felicity would have expected. She had taken her time, almost like she had been enjoying seeing Felicity’s fear.

Still Felicity had kept running. Emmy had been standing in the hallway, holding her pink giraffe in her arms.

“What’s the noises, mommy?” she had asked, her voice sounding just as tired as her eyes had looked.

Noises. She had spoken of noises, Felicity thought, desperately trying to remember what noises her daughter had heard, but the only noise Felicity remembered was the quick beating of her heart she had heard in her ears like she did now. No, there had been something else. Smashing of glass and other things.

“Emmy, run into Tommy’s room!” Felicity had yelled.

But Emmy hadn’t moved, not understanding what had been going on or why she had been supposed to run when usually her parents would tell her not to run around when Tommy was asleep. So Felicity had just taken the toddler’s hand when running past her and dragged her with her into Tommy’s nursery. Emmy had cried and whined for her to let her go because she had been hurting her, but Felicity had only let go of her when they had closed the door to Tommy’s room behind them and locked it safely.

God, she had hurt Emmy! She had held her hand too tightly and ran too quickly, pulling too much at the little girl’s hand.

And then… Then she had pulled at Emmy’s hand again, tugging her daughter behind the rocking chair and telling her to crouch down and hide there before she had taken Tommy from his crib, wrapped him into a blanket and laid him down at the bottom of his wardrobe. She hadn’t completely closed the doors. She didn’t remember why.

Looking back, trying to hide her kids seemed stupid. It had been Cupid after her and in the small room it would have only been a matter of time to find them no matter how well hidden they would have been. But Felicity had known that there had been no possibility to escape from the nursery because when Oliver had built the house for them, he had taken care that all of the rooms were burglarproof – how the hell had Cupid even managed to get in?! Felicity must have forgotten to switch on the alarm system, feeling too safe in her home, but it didn’t matter anyway because the only thing that mattered was that Cupid _had_ found a way in, not the how – and unfortunately escape-proof, too. So hiding them had been the only possibility and yet it seemed stupid because hiding her kids in a small room had just been… stupid.

And it hadn’t taken long until Cupid had kicked in the door. Emmy had held onto Felicity’s leg, crying for her mommy to tell her what was going on and for her daddy to come.

But Oliver hadn’t come, and instead Cupid had slowly come closer, smiling evilly or maybe crazily. Or even both.

“Well, well,” she had said in a sing-song that had goose bumps spread all over Felicity’s skin, “it’s been a while since we’ve last seen each other.”

“Not long enough,” Felicity had replied between clenched teeth. “What do you want?”

“What I’ve always wanted. True love,” Cupid had answered. “I want to be with him. Fight with him. Kill for him.”

The redheaded villain had slowly stepped closer, eying up Felicity closely, and though Felicity’s first instinct had been to take a step back, she had taken a step towards her, preventing Cupid from getting anywhere too close to Emmeline, who was still crouched behind the rocking chair and now that she couldn’t hold onto her mother’s leg anymore crying even more in fear. Her mommy sense had made her gone all momma bear on the dangerous woman.

“You’re time at his side is over, honey,” Cupid had whispered, a hateful glint in her cat-like eyes. “Now it’s my time.”

“Over my dead body will I-“

“That can be arranged.”

Just when Cupid’s hand had moved to Felicity’s throat, _he_ had stepped into Tommy’s nursery, whispering with dangerously quiet voice, “Touch her and our deal is invalid.”

Deal, Felicity thought. What deal? What deal had those two agreed upon?

Giving him a look, Cupid had shrugged her shoulders. “Fine. You take the girls, and I will take my baby boy.”

“Mommy!” Emmy had cried out.

Felicity had turned to her daughter, wanting to soothe her and tell her that everything was going to be alright. But instead of managing to comfort her scared daughter, all turning her head had done had been giving her intruders the opportunity to inject a drug into the side of her neck. She had turned back when she had felt the pain. She had seen the syringe and…

Everything was blurry from that moment on, more blurry than all those other memories even. There were only indistinct pieces that she could barely put together in her mind.

She remembered that Emmy had been crying out for her mommy and daddy again and again.  
She remembered hearing Tommy’s cries, too.  
She remembered lying on the mattress of her bed and staring at the ceiling of her bedroom. She had barely been able to move, drifting in and out of consciousness as she had tried to fight the effects of the drug.  
She remembered that when she had been able to move, she had been grabbing whatever her hand had gotten a hold on and driven it into his chest.   
She also remembered his cry right before she had lost consciousness completely.

So she was here, wherever that was, with him. And so was Emmy probably, while Tommy was probably with Cupid, and Oliver… Oliver was probably somewhere searching for them.

He had to find them! She needed to make him know where she was.

She needed to find out where she was!

And she needed to find out where Tommy was! And Emmy!

If one of her babies had gotten hurt-

Felicity opened her eyes, and what she saw made her stomach twist and turn painfully.

The two platinum rings she had worn on her left hand for the last years, visually connecting her with Oliver, were gone and replaced with a single yellow gold one. It even looked wrong, and Felicity had to swallow hard to not stop crying because knowing she had been abducted was just very different from seeing proof of it on her hand.

But Felicity knew that she had to stay focused. She couldn’t allow herself to fall apart or get lost in fear and desperation. She had children to think about, and she had to find out where they were and how to protect them. They needed to be safe.

So she took in a slightly sniffling breath and only concentrated on not bursting out into tears when she heard a voice she hadn’t heard in years and wished she wouldn’t have been forced to hear again, whisper into her ear, “Good morning, Sugar Pie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> Allies  
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations  
> Deperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	107. Allies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover  
> Left behind

“Oliver-“

“It’s been more than twelve hours! Twelve hours, and we got nothing!” Oliver yelled back at his friend, his voice almost echoing through the lair. “There is no sign of where Cupid is or where she has taken Tommy, Emmy and Felicity. We still don’t know whose blood we’ve found-“

“I am running the tests, but it takes a little longer,” Caitlin interrupted gently, but Oliver ignored her.

“-which means that Felicity could already be dead. Or Emmy or Tommy. Even if it isn’t any of their blood, any second they spent with Cupid their life is in danger.”

“I know that and I-“

“Then why are you trying to hold me the hell back instead of going out there with me?!”

“Because we need to keep a cool head-“

“To hell with keeping a cool head. It’s Felicity! And Emmy and Tommy!”

Sucking in a deep breath, Oliver turned around on his heels, grabbed the pink giraffe from the med table and walked up and down restlessly. He pressed his daughter’s favorite stuffed animal to his chest, holding it close like he would love to hold his family close right now. Holding onto the stuffed animal didn’t really help the fear and anger he was feeling, but it helped him to not fall apart completely right now though with every passing second he felt himself coming closer to indeed fall apart.

Because his family was still missing. And they weren’t any closer to finding them now than they had been hours ago. There was no lead they could follow. And none of the criminals he had interrogated in the few hours of at least partial darkness since they had gone missing had been able to tell him anything. And if they had been able, they would have told him. Oliver had been quite rigid when interrogating them.

Too rigid for especially John’s and Laurel’s taste.

John had dragged him back here in the late morning when the sun had risen already and Team Flash had announced their arrival. Oliver hated to be down here instead of in the field. He might know rationally that going out there in his Arrow suit during the sunny hours of the late afternoon was a bad idea, but being down here just made him feel caged and even more helpless than he had been feeling in the field.

He kept walking up and down, trying to calm himself – unsuccessfully.   
The anger inside of his chest didn’t decrease. The burning rage only seemed to heat up.

Why did it seem like he was the only one who cared about his family being missing?

John was actively holding him back from going and finding his loved ones. Laurel was supporting John and after receiving a text message had even left for work or whatever like today wasn’t different from any other day. Roy and Thea had been staying out of any discussions but obviously leaned more towards John’s side than his since they were just standing there with their head ducked down, not saying a word.  
Neither did Team Flash seem to be any help. Caitlin was running the tests on the blood sample they had taken, but it was taking too long. Cisco had finally gotten into Felicity’s way too well secured system which had also taking too long, but he hadn’t found any trace of Cupid yet, and nothing Barry had done so far had been any help, either.

“I am heading out,” Oliver announced, tightening his hold on the pink giraffe when he turned around on his heels once more, heading to the back part of the lair where they had left their suits when they had come back here hours ago. But John stepped into his way. He put a hand to Oliver’s chest. And Oliver snapped. He pushed his friend away from him forcefully, making him tumble back a few steps. “You always claim that you love Felicity like she is your own sister. And yet you don’t do anything to save her! Or her children! You’re just standing there, doing nothing!”

“Hey, don’t you dare say something like this to me!” John yelled back.

Oliver almost winced. Since John had come to Oliver’s and Felicity’s home the night before, his voice had never grown too loud. He had always been quiet. It was the first time Oliver wondered if his own pain had blinded him for his friend’s fear.

“Felicity is my sister! Emmy is my goddaughter! Tommy is Lyla’s godson!” John shouted, now letting his feelings show completely. “They are my family just like you are! Don’t you dare accuse me of not caring enough about them! Don’t you dare accusing anyone of us to not care enough!”

Oliver slowly looked around, seeing everyone ducking down their heads sadly. Thea leaned against Roy, who wrapped his arms around his girlfriend tightly, holding her close and pressing his nose to her hair like he was reassuring himself that she was here. Because unlike Oliver Roy had his most loved one here.

His heart clenched painfully in his chest.

He knew that everyone loved Felicity and the kids. Accusing them of anything different probably wasn’t fair. Their abduction had hit all of them hard.

And yet Oliver couldn’t get rid of the feeling that he was the only one willing to do something about it. Like everyone else was just wanting to sit down and wait until they would magically come back which probably wasn’t fair to accuse them of, either, but Oliver just couldn’t help himself. He hated that his friends wanted him to sit down instead of going out and-

John stepped back closer to Oliver who clenched his hand to a fist and opened it again and again to ease away some of the rage in his body. He stepped so close that nobody else could hear the words he whispered next.

“You can’t go out there and keep blindly beating up every little criminal in this city, or you’ll lose yourself and you’ll lose everything.”

“I’ve already lost everything,” Oliver whispered back.

“No, you didn’t,” John replied firmly, yet just as quietly as before. “As long as there is no other proof, we will believe that Felicity, Emmeline and Thomas are alright. Cupid _wants_ you, and she needs them alive to use them against you. If we waste all of our energy by going out there without any plan, we are most likely getting us and them in danger. And we won’t have any energy left when there actually is something we can do.”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath, never losing John’s gaze.

“Caitlin is working on the blood sample. Cisco is trying to get anything on Cupid. Laurel headed out for the same reason.”

“I thought she had gone to work,” Oliver murmured quietly, his voice barely louder than a whisper.

“You don’t really think any of us is going to leave and live our normal lives until all three of them are back with you safe, right?”

Oliver ducked his head guiltily. He had thought that everything was normal for them, and he was ashamed of thinking that way, but…

He could barely breathe. All of his thoughts were occupied with his fear and pain, a pain he couldn’t only feel emotionally but also physically. He felt it in the painful stabbing in his chest with every heartbeat and the uncontrollable shaking of his hands. Just like he felt his helplessness in his blind attempt to do _anything_ as long as he was doing _something_.

“I can’t sit here and do nothing, John,” Oliver stated loud enough for everyone to hear. He knew it wasn’t exactly enough of an apology, but it was all he was able to do right now.

“Maybe there might finally come some movement into the search.”

At Cisco’s words Oliver hurried towards where the young man was sitting in Felicity’s chair in front of her computers and asked, “Did you find something? Do you know where they are or-?”

“No, but Laurel and Lyla are on their way down here,” Cisco replied, pointing at one of the screens where the recording of one of the security cameras of Verdant showed the two women hurrying to the secret door to the basement. He turned around to John. “I thought Lyla still hasn’t called you back.”

“She hasn’t,” John answered, his face facial expression slightly darkening.

Oliver looked at John, wordlessly asking what that meant, but John only shrugged his shoulders, not entirely sure himself.

Please let her know something helpful, Oliver prayed quietly. Lyla had to know something. She had to know how Cupid had escaped and hopefully where she had gone or just… something. Anything could help. They just needed something to let them know where they had to search. They needed good news.

They had to find them.

Oliver lifted the pink giraffe to his face, nuzzling the plush gently.   
His family had to come back home safe.

When he heard the door to the lair being opened, Oliver turned around. Laurel was hurrying down the steps, followed by Lyla. Both of the women looked seriously worried.

Please no bad news, Oliver modified his silent prayer. When good news was too much to hope for, no bad news seemed to be second best.

“Laurel filled me in on everything you know on our way down here,” Lyla stated once she had reached the foot of the stairs. “Cupid has indeed escaped. She and the rest of the suicide squad have been assigned with a mission, and she escaped three days ago. Headquarters didn’t tell me until my own mission was ended. Otherwise I would have called and warned you. A.R.G.U.S. tried to track her, but it didn’t work. I guess she has gotten rid of the transmitter we planted into her neck and destroyed it. We have no idea where she is.”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath. Lyla had been his only hope for information on Cupid’s location right now. If A.R.G.U.S. didn’t know where she was, how could they know? They couldn’t just wait for her to call the next time. Cisco had already tried to locate the phone Cupid had called from, but she had turned it off or whatever else she had done to make it impossible for anyone to track her.

“So we’re no step further than before,” Oliver groaned, clenching his teeth.

“We might not know where Cupid is, but I think we know who she works with,” Lyla replied.

Oliver looked at her intensely, feeling his heartbeat fastening. If they knew who Cupid worked with, maybe they could get to her through them. It was the first glimpse of hope he had caught sight of since the second he had realized that his family had been taken.

“Cupid is not the only one who escaped out of prison,” Laurel now stated. “I heard from a responsible source that Michael Foster escaped shortly after Cupid, too.”

“That has to be a coincidence,” Oliver replied immediately. “Two different people who don’t know each other abducting my family?”

“Cupid and Foster do know each other, Oliver,” Lyla explained. “A.R.G.U.S. tried to recruit Foster for the suicide squad last summer. But he was too delusional. It didn’t work. Cupid and he together were only worsening each other’s delusions. That is how they met and found that they both have a connection to your family. Our technical analysts are still viewing the recordings of the prison Foster escaped from, but my guess is that Cupid helped Foster out of there after she escaped, and they decided to ally to get what they want. Foster gets Felicity, and Cupid gets you.”

“How the hell could you not tell us that?!” Oliver yelled at Lyla. “Do you know in how much danger my family is because we didn’t know-“

“Felicity knew,” Lyla interrupted him gently, and Oliver immediately fell silent. “I told Felicity.”

“When?” he asked breathlessly. “When did you tell her?”

“Shortly before Christmas,” Lyla answered. “She said she was going to tell you after the holidays. She didn’t want to ruin them for you. But it doesn’t matter who knew and who didn’t because all we have to know right now is that Foster and Cupid know each other, and most likely allied to get what they want. Cupid didn’t do this alone.”

Whatever hope Lyla’s arrival had sparked in Oliver had died the second he heard that man’s name falling from Laurel’s lips. His shoulders slumped. His head fell forward. Burying his face in the pink plush of the giraffe in his hand, Oliver turned around, almost stumbled to the med table and let his upper body drop onto the cold metal.

Michael Foster and Carrie Cutter allying with each other!  
And Felicity had known that those two had met and not told him anything about it because he had made such a big thing of Christmas. He had wanted to make them so special that Felicity hadn’t even dared to tell him that Cupid and Foster, two of the greatest threats they had experienced since they had built a family, had met each other.

“Who is Michael Foster?” he heard Caitlin whisper, now that Oliver and Lyla had both fallen silent.

“He is a criminal, known for arm trafficking. He provided a lot of the local gangs with weapons two and half years back,” Roy was the first to answer.

“So you stopped him, and he’s working with that crazy Cupid girl to get his revenge?” Cisco asked.

“No,” Thea almost whispered her answer. “He stalked Felicity in high school. When Emmy was four months old-“

Oliver stopped listening. He didn’t need his sister’s or anybody else’s help to remember clearly what had happened when Emmy had been four months old.

One night the whole team had been out on a mission to save an abducted child, but it had been a trap. It had turned out that Michael Foster, the guy who had stalked Felicity in her freshman year, had set up the trap for him. Having been drugged in a moment of carelessness, Oliver had had no choice but to take the beating and let Foster take his wedding band from his finger. When the team had found him, they had taken him to the hospital, telling the doctors that he had had a motorcycle accident.  
When he had woken up after surgery, he had been full of rage. He had never been good at dealing with someone threatening his family. He had wanted to kill the guy, and somehow all of that had led to a terrible fight with Felicity a little later on. He remembered saying something that had made it sound like he was breaking up with her, and he remembered leaving.  
When he had come back home to apologize, he had found the house they had lived in back then in chaos, a similar chaos to the one he had found his house in only hours back.

Oliver cursed himself silently. He should have known sooner! The mess the house had been left in had worn Foster’s signature. He just should have known!

Back then Foster had taken Felicity, too. He had lived in the delusion that he and Felicity were meant to be, and that she wanted to be with him, while Oliver had only held her captive. He had taken her to his stepsister’s house, planning a life there with her, with her and Emmeline actually. He had offered her to get Emmy, but Felicity had replied that she didn’t care about her. She had played along, telling him what he wanted to hear without getting herself or Emmeline into more danger.

Because, hell, Foster was dangerous! As peaceful as he could be when it seemed like everything was working the way he had planned it and the way he wanted everything to be, as easily did his attitude change when things weren’t going his way.

Back then A.R.G.U.S. had found Foster rather quickly. Felicity had been back with him in only a few hours. Foster had been taken to prison because Felicity had held him back from beating that piece of crap to death.

He had never wished more that he had followed his first instinct and just killed the guy.  
He should have killed him the second Felicity had told him about that guy.

“So Cupid has Tommy, and Foster has Felicity,” Oliver stated, not caring that he had interrupted his sister. He walked back to his friends, shortly noticing that Cisco was working on the computers, hopefully finding something they could use to start with. “But who has Emmy?”

“Cupid would have surely used her to put more pressure on you if Emmy was with her,” Laurel stated. “So I guess she’s with Felicity and Foster.”

“But why would Foster take her? Back when he abducted her the last time, Felicity told him that she didn’t care about her.”

“Foster is highly delusional,” Lyla repeated her words from before. “In his mind all Felicity does, she does to protect him and be with him. So in his mind the only reason Felicity said that was probably to protect him from you. And if he had one of his clearer moments, then he knew that the easiest way to keep Felicity under his control, is to use Emmeline to put more pressure on her.”

Oliver moved his hands through his short hair almost violently. “So it’s Foster, Felicity and Emmy and Cupid and Tommy?”

“Mothers’ and their daughters, fathers’ and their sons, right?” Roy asked.

Why wasn’t one threat enough for them to take?  
Why did two villains have to ally against them?

“We have to find them,” Oliver whispered, “all of them. I cannot lose any of them.”

Lyla stepped forwards until she stood right in front of him. She took his free hand into hers and said, “We will do whatever we have to do to get them back, okay?”

Oliver nodded hesitatingly, gulping hard. He almost felt like his body wasn’t connected to him anymore. Everything hurt in a way it had never done before, no matter what torture he had been put through.

He looked at Lyla, seeing the struggle in her eyes, and for a short moment he wondered if she was going to ask him who was the priority because he knew that sometimes, when not everybody could be saved, you would have to make a choice. You would have to choose who would be the most important to save. And the thought made everything in him hurt. Because he couldn’t decide between his wife and his children. Picking one of them over the other… He couldn’t.

And Lyla didn’t ask him to. Oliver wasn’t sure if she had seen his panic and decided to not ask him or whether she hadn’t intended to make him choose in the first place, but either way he wasn’t forced to make that choice.

Yet, Oliver added after a short pause in his thoughts. He wasn’t forced to choose between them yet. He might still be forced to do so in the future. And he didn’t want to even think about what impossible situation he would be in, and what consequences his decision would have.

He had seen Shado die when he had decided for Sara, and he had seen his mother die when she had made the choice for him. Thinking about choosing between-

“Oliver,” Lyla whispered after a while and waited until Oliver’s attention focused back on her before she added, “We need to be especially careful about Cupid. A.R.G.U.S. wants her back no matter the cost.”

“The cost?” Thea asked. “What… What do you mean?”

Oliver took in a deep breath, feeling the angry rage grow back to its former intensity. He had known from the start that A.R.G.U.S. wasn’t necessarily an agency that could be counted to the goods, no matter how much they insisted that whatever they did, they did it for the greater good of the world. But going this far, he didn’t know if he had thought they were capable of something like that.

“It means that they don’t care if a baby dies. It’s only collateral damage to them,” Oliver explained with a dangerously quiet growl. “So we need to be the firsts to find Cupid.

 

 

Felicity tried to keep her hand from shaking when she stirred the spices into the sauce because she knew that if Foster saw that her hands were shaking, he would come here and try to comfort her, and she just couldn’t be touched by him. Whenever he had touched her today, she had pulled back slowly, telling him that she just needed a little more time, and he had understood, but Felicity doubted that his understanding was going to last very long.

Back in high school he had seemed like a nice guy when her friend Amber and her boyfriend had arranged a double date with Michael and Felicity. But Felicity just hadn’t had feelings for him. And that had been when Michael, or Foster as she had started calling him then to distance herself from him, had shown his true face. He had started watching her and showing up wherever she had gone.

After she had pressed charges against him, she thought she had gotten rid of him until he had showed up in Starling less than three years ago. When he had taken her back then, she had just played along as well as she had been able to. And as long as she didn’t find any possibility to escape from here, she would have to do the same now.

Only that this time it was so much harder to give him the feeling of family and a shared future than it had been before, Felicity thought with a look down to where Emmy was playing with a doll right to her mother’s feet.

As soon as Felicity had made Foster know that she was awake this morning, she had asked for Emmy, and she had only waited until the last syllable of his answer had left his mouth before she had hurried to the room Foster had told her was Emmy’s. The toddler had been asleep, probably after crying herself to sleep when she had been taken here with her mother drugged and unconscious. To wake her without scaring her to death Felicity had pulled her into her lap and cradled her against her body, comfortingly rubbing her daughter’s back and whispering soothing words into her ear. She had told her that everything was alright, and neither of them was going to get hurt, but she had to be at her best behavior and do exactly what her mommy told her to do.

The memory made her stomach drop. She had told Emmy that everything was alright which was a terrible lie, and she had told her she wouldn’t get hurt if she did what her mother told her which might also turn out to not be true. But what else had she been supposed to tell her daughter? The little girl wasn’t even three years old yet, and she was scared as it was. Frightening her even more seemed cruel, especially since for now Foster seemed to be content about how things were.

Felicity glanced at Emmy once more. The whole day Emmy hadn’t left her mother’s side. She had always held her hand or held onto her mother’s leg. When Foster had tried to talk to her, she had whimpered and hidden her face against her mother’s body. Felicity had told him that Emmy just needed time. Her stomach twisted painfully at the thought of what would happen if Foster’s understanding would soon decrease. She could bear whatever he was going to do to her, but Emmy was a little girl. She shouldn’t be put through any of this.

She knew that Oliver was already searing for them, but with Tommy being in Cupid’s grip, he had a lot of things to do. She just knew that she had to try and find a way out of here herself. And she knew that it wasn’t going to be easy because from what Foster had told her, he had taken care that they would be harder to find this time than the last time. He had said things about _Keeping your enemies close_ and others Felicity hadn’t quite understand, but what she had understood had been that Foster hadn’t picked a place as easy to find as his step-sister’s house where he had taken her two and half years ago.

Felicity glanced at Foster shortly. He was almost as muscular as Oliver - well-trained, definitely taller and stronger than she was. And Felicity had neglected her training since she had found out that she was pregnant with Tommy. Fighting Foster herself would not have much use. It would be like fighting against a brick wall. And even if she managed to wound him with any of the knives she had here in the kitchen – she shivered when for a second she thought about what would happen if she killed him – her problems wouldn’t be solved because Foster had a team of armed towsers out there. They were patrolling around the house as it seemed.

She would have to find out where exactly Foster had taken them, and then she would have to make a really good plan on how to escape. She really couldn’t risk Emmy getting hurt, and right now no scenarios of escaping Felicity had envisioned in her head hadn’t get the little girl hurt.

“Mommy?”

When Emmy tugged at the hem of the sweater Felicity had put on this morning, Felicity bent down and lifted her daughter into her arms, letting her sit on her hip. The toddler looked scared, like she had done the whole day if she hadn’t been distracted. Emmy was smart. No matter how much Felicity had tried to tell her daughter that everything was alright and they were not getting hurt, of course the little girl hadn’t forgotten what circumstanced had lead them here. She knew something was wrong.

“Are you hungry?” Felicity asked with a smile she hoped was at least party believable and in some way comforting. “Dinner is almost finished.”

Emmy shook her head, resting her head on her mother’s shoulder and holding onto the neckline of the sweater.  Felicity snuggled her cheek against the crown of her daughter’s head.

“I wanna go home,” Emmy whispered quietly.

Felicity glanced at Foster, who was sitting at the dining table, watching the two of them. He smiled at her. It made Felicity’s stomach twist painfully, but she smiled back at him briefly before lowering her lips to Emmy’s ear.

“We’ll go back home, but not yet,” she whispered as quietly as possible to make sure Foster wouldn’t hear.

“When?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity whispered, and the words created a stabbing pain in her heart because she knew those words were everything but comforting. “We just have to make the best out of being here, okay?”

“How?” Emmy asked with small voice.

She lifted her head from her mother’s shoulder to look at her, and Felicity had to take in a sniffling breath when she saw the tears in her daughter’s eyes. No child, no human being of any age should be put through something like this. Being violently taken from their home and… this.

Felicity couldn’t remember for sure if she had been this scared the last time when it had been just her Foster had taken, but she was actually convinced that everything about this was worse. Emmy was here. Whatever Foster would do, could hurt her. And the thought of Tommy being held somewhere else, being alone without his parents…

Everything inside of her hurt.

But she couldn’t let her fear show because if Emmy saw her mother’s fear, it would only frighten her more. And if there was anything Felicity could do to make the situation a little less painful for her daughter, then she would do it. It was the only good she felt she could do right now.

“Well, dinner is ready, and it’s spaghetti,” Felicity explained, trying to sound lightly. “How about we don’t cut your spaghetti like we usually do, and you get to eat them in full length instead?”

Emmy nodded, and Felicity smiled comfortingly before leaning down and pressing a kiss to each of her daughter’s cheeks.

As long as she couldn’t offer much true hope that they would make it out of here, she would just keep using every possibility she got to make her daughter’s day a little better, and if eating spaghetti in full length would help that, then she would allow her daughter to create a great mess with her dinner and play with the food though that was usually forbidden. Who cared about stains of tomato sauce or anything as long as Emmy was a little distracted from the frightening situation around them?

Felicity set the table without letting Emmy down on the floor, and even when she sat down on the chair, she didn’t push Emmy off her lap like she would do if they were home where the little girl knew that she had to sit on her own chair for dinner. As long as they were here, they would just ignore any rules there normally were because nothing about this situation was normal.

She felt nauseated, and the thought of eating was enough to make her stomach cramp painfully, but Felicity didn’t miss her daughter’s intense gaze on her. She knew that Emmy wouldn’t eat before Felicity had started eating. So Felicity wound some of the spaghetti around her fork and pushed the food into her mouth, smiling at the little girl encouragingly.

Felicity watched with relief as Emmeline started eating, too. She lifted a lot of spaghetti from her plate and pushed them partly into her mouth, so their endings were hanging out between her lips and swinging back and forth in front of her chin. Felicity just smiled and kept picking at her own spaghetti.

“You’re not hungry, sugar pie?”

Immediately Felicity pushed Emmy a little closer to herself, wrapping her arm around the toddler a little more firmly. She hadn’t missed how the toddler had winced at the sound of Foster’s voice like for a short moment she had almost forgotten that he was there with them.

“No,” Felicity replied with a smile that made her stomach twist painfully. “I think the drugs might have had an effect on my appetite.”

Foster put the hand that wasn’t holding a fork onto Felicity’s hand on Emmy’s back, looking at her almost apologetically which made Felicity only feel more nauseated then before which she hadn’t believed would be possible until then. Part of her wanted to just pull back and scream at him that he was delusional, but she stopped herself, knowing that confronting him with the reality would only make everything worse. Foster wouldn’t let them go. He would just use more force to keep them and make his picture perfect true.

“Mommy?” Emmy whispered, trying to wriggle away from Foster’s touch, and Felicity hastily turned her daughter on her lap, so she was sitting in the other direction, further away from the man she was scared of.

“I hope you know that I only drugged you for your best,” Foster stated calmly. “I didn’t want you to hurt yourself.”

A cold shiver ran down the length of Felicity’s spine. Hadn’t he told her the exact same thing the last time he had taken her?

“And in case you are worried about stabbing me,” Foster added with his voice just as gentle as it had been before, “you don’t have to. You were disorientated because of the drug. I know you would never hurt me on purpose. And the injury is not that bad. A little stab wound is not enough to drive me to my knees.”

Felicity tried to smile, but she knew that it couldn’t be convincing, so she hastily pushed a fork of spaghetti into her mouth. She had trouble fighting the urge to gag, but she kept chewing bravely. Her eyes fell on Emmy, who had tomato sauce everywhere in her face now, and she shortly wondered if Tommy was alright, too - if he was healthy and unharmed, if he was being fed and comforted when he cried. But Felicity pushed the thought away as much as she could push her worry away at all. She was silently praying for her baby boy to be alright, but she already felt tears burning in her eyes, and she knew if she was thinking about him any longer, she would start crying, and she wasn’t sure if she could stop then.

“Is it about your son?” Foster asked, and Felicity looked at him with wide eyes, wondering if she had babbled any of her thoughts out loud. If It was Oliver knowing what she was thinking, she would always joke about a connection of their souls or something, but the thought of Foster knowing what she thought only made her feel horrible. Holding her breath, she forced herself to remain still when Foster put his hand to her cheek, and whisper gently, “I wouldn’t have gotten out of the clink they caged me in if I hadn’t promised Cutter the little boy, but one word and I will make sure he is right there with us. I know you only said you didn’t want your daughter with you because you didn’t want to risk losing me again. So if you want your son with us, all you have to do is say it. I will get him here, and he will live with us.”

Felicity thought about it briefly. She wanted to have Tommy back in her arms. She wanted to have both of her children with her or rather wanted them safe. If she told Foster to get Tommy, chances were high that her little boy was getting hurt, and that was the last thing he wanted. Her kids getting hurt – wasn’t that every mother’s worst nightmare?

“No, I think… I think the three of us is enough,” Felicity explained, gulping.

Foster nodded. “All I have to do is to finish one deal, and then it’s going to be only us. We will start new somewhere else, somewhere where nobody will find us.”

So they were still in Starling, Felicity figured. She had wondered about that already. She had assumed that they still where here, but she hadn’t known for sure until now. To make a plan on how to escape, she would have to figure out more, though. She had to know where exactly they were, and how she could get out of here without Foster or any of his armed cronies she had seen through the bathroom window would realize.

She had to explore the house. With Foster following her almost all day and watching her every move, she hadn’t dared to test if the windows could be opened. She hadn’t even dared to look out of the window long enough to figure out where exactly she was. When she had been in the bathroom, she had only been able to see into a dark alley. And she hadn’t wanted to leave Emmy alone with Foster too long, so she had hurried back without trying to figure out more about where she was or testing whether or not the windows could be opened.

“I am going to take Emmy to bed now,” Felicity stated when Emmy yawned, snuggling back against her mother and turning in her lap, so she could press her face against her shoulder. The tomato sauce that had been covering her face was now covering Felicity’s sweater.

“Do you need help?”

“No,” Felicity said hastily, maybe a little bit too hastily because Foster’s eyes narrowed on her. Felicity cradled Emmeline closer to her protectively, turning a little, so she was positioned between her daughter and Foster. “Uhm… Emmy doesn’t fall asleep easily when there are too many people around. So it’s better if I go alone.”

“I’ll be waiting here for you,” Foster replied, his voice still sounding a little doubting.

Felicity nodded. “I’ll come back as soon as she is asleep.”

She hurried upstairs to the bathroom, helping her daughter to wash her face and brush her teeth. She had no idea how long Foster had been out of prison already, but somehow he had managed to get everything they would need, a toddler’s toothbrush included. Felicity carried her daughter to the room that Foster had made Emmy’s. It was a large room, but only sparsely furnished.

“Don’t leave, mommy,” Emmy whispered when Felicity tugged her under the warm blanket. “I don’t want to be alone.”

Gulping loudly, Felicity leaned down and pressed a kiss to her daughter’s forehead before stroking over her curly, blonde hair.

“You are not alone, okay?” Felicity whispered. “Mommy is right here, and as soon as you call me, I’ll be back here with you, okay?”

“I’m scared.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath. She had trouble to hold back her tears at her daughter’s words. Felicity was scared, and she had known that Emmy was, too, but hearing the words was like a stab to her heart. She hadn’t been able to prevent this from happening. She hadn’t been able to protect herself or her children. And that was why Emmy was scared now.

“Do you remember the vacation we went on before Tommy was born?” Emmy nodded. “Close your eyes, and pretend to be right there with daddy and me, okay?”

“And Tommy in your tummy?”

Felicity smiled. “And Tommy in my tummy.”

Emmy turned onto her side, not letting go of her mother’s hand. She squeezed her eyes shot, but asked, “Can you stop the light?”

Felicity turned her head to the window where flashes of light fell into the dark room through a small gap between the curtains every now and then.

“I’ll close the curtains, okay?” Felicity whispered, but Emmy didn’t answer. Her breath had already evened out, and she lay beneath her blanket motionlessly except for the rising and falling of her chest with every breath.

Felicity pressed another kiss to her daughter’s head before getting up and going to the window. If a dark room was what Emmy wanted, and Felicity was almost surprised that even though her daughter was scared she still insisted on complete darkness around her like she always did at home, claiming that she couldn’t sleep with any light on. Oliver and Felicity had bought little lights for the nursery, thinking that a toddler would like some light, but Emmy had insisted very early that she really couldn’t sleep with any light switched on.

She was just different than other kids, so Felicity hoped that whatever the next hours –  and she refused to believe that it was going to take more than hours for them to get back home – would bring, Emmy would get over it.

Felicity tried to be as quietly as possible when she tugged at the curtains to get the gap to close. When it didn’t work, she took in a deep, frustrated breath. She pushed the curtains apart a little, intending to try and tug them closer together then, but what she saw from the window made her heart and mind start to race.

Only a few streets away she could see the green illuminated V above the main entrance of Verdant. The moving sky light next to the entrance shone right into this room every few seconds.

Foster had talked about _keeping your enemies closer_. Felicity hadn’t ascribed much importance to his words, thinking that it was only sign that his delusions were becoming more panicked as his brain slowly caught up onto reality and onto how he had forced Felicity into this. But it seemed like he had actually meant their location here right now. They were close to Oliver because being so close to him, Foster could obverse him.

For the first time since she had realized that she wasn’t home in her bed and Oliver’s arms but held captive, Felicity felt some kind of hope rising inside of her. She was so close to home, there had to be a way for her and Emmy to get back home.

And hopefully when they got back home, Tommy would already be there, too. Safe and unharmed. Felicity just needed her children to get home safe. She didn’t care if she got hurt or anything, but her children needed to be safe. She’d do anything to have them safe again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations  
> Deperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat 
> 
> And while our Olicity family is in danger, I will go have dinner with my real life inspiration for Emmy and Tommy. ;)


	108. One step forth, two steps back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies

“That would have been too easy,” Thea stated when they gathered in what had used to be the living room in the house Foster’s stepsister had lived in years ago.

“Using the same hideout like he has the last time probably wouldn’t have been too smart,” Barry added with a nod.

“It was just a starting point,” John replied. “Sometimes the most obvious reasons aren’t leading us to where we want to go, but they help us to take a step forward.”

“I don’t feel like we’ve taken a step forward,” Thea almost whispered.

“At least we can cross this place off our list of locations to look for them.”

John seemed to give his best in being the voice of reason and hope – now more than ever, Oliver thought, looking at his friend.

“How about I just scour the whole city for them?” Barry suggested. “Can’t take that long.”

“We don’t even know for sure that they’re still in the city,” John answered, shaking his head. “And even if they are, you can’t just get into where they are and get them out. Remember the time Felicity’s shirt started burning?”

“Never going to forget that!”

“And one wrong person seeing you and suspecting that you know where they are might endanger them. So as long as there are other possibilities, I think we shouldn’t put any of them into more danger than they are already in right now.”

Barry nodded, looking at Oliver sadly. “I wish I could do more.”

Oliver didn’t say a word. He lifted his hand and moved his fingers through his short hair under the hood almost violently, his nails scratching over his scalp. The physical pain didn’t make the emotional pain any better, but at least it grounded him enough to remind him that he was still alive though it didn’t feel like that. And feeling the worried gazes of his friends on his skin didn’t do anything to help easing the tension from his body, either.  
And, god, he needed some of the tension to ease off! He would love to just punch somebody’s, preferably Foster’s, face over and over again until everything that remained was a bloody clump.

It had been a while since he had felt the need to be that violent, the need to kill again the last time. But he couldn’t help it. He should have killed Foster when he had taken Felicity the first time. He should have even killed Cupid. But he hadn’t killed either of them because he had lost focus. He had been so wrapped up in his happy family life that he had forgotten that sometimes it was necessary to do ugly things to keep his family and his city safe.

“Let’s just hope that Laurel, Lyla and Roy will have more luck.”

After Lyla and Laurel had come to the lair with the new information, Cisco had run a search on Foster. The facial recognition Felicity had “borrowed” from the FBI as she had once stated herself hadn’t helped them because just like it had been the case with Cupid none of the cameras of traffic control had caught sight of him. What Cisco had found, though, were two possible locations Foster could be – the house his stepsister still owned though she had moved away some time ago and the warehouse Foster and his criminal friends had used to store weapons in before he and most of his allies had been arrested.

Since there hadn’t been anything new about Cupid yet, they had headed out in two teams to check both locations. Oliver had been torn between which place to go, but at the end Lyla’s words about Foster wanting a family with Felicity and in his mind is not holding her captive had prompted him to go to his stepsister’s house. But they hadn’t found anything here. There was not even a hint on where Foster who had indeed been freed by Cupid as the video footage of the security cameras had proven might have taken Felicity and Emmy, provided that he had really taken both of them. It was still just an assumption they had made.

“So we’re heading back?” Thea asked.

The thought made Oliver’s shoulders slump. He didn’t want to go back to the lair and spend the rest of the night sitting in the semi-darkness, picturing the worst scenarios of how this nightmare would play out. Even standing here, he couldn’t help but see the dead bodies of his loved ones in front of him because he hadn’t been able to save them. He needed to do something, whatever it was, or otherwise his fear would eat him alive.

“Guys?”

Oliver almost flinched at the sound of Caitlin’s voice on the comms. He was so used to hearing Felicity on the other end of the line that hearing anybody else felt terribly wrong to him.

“The blood sample?” Oliver asked immediately, though, not letting his fear of what could be keeping him from finding out what really was. He needed to find out what was really going on. He needed to know if one of his loved ones was hurt.

He held his breath, barely noticing that his friends seemed to do the same since they could hear Caitlin as well as Oliver could. Barry, Roy and John exchanged nervous glances while Oliver focused on a spot on the wall. He tried to force some air into his lungs, thinking it might ease the pain and panic inside of him, but he felt himself unable to make his body do what he wanted.

Every break of a second felt like hours. His mind was running wild, imagining the worst results the analysis of the blood sample could have brought like anticipating the pain was going to make it easier when it would become real. Oliver felt his chest tightening, his heart pounding against his ribs so forcefully it might crack them.

What if it was any of their blood?  
Felicity would be able to take a blood loss like that, but Emmy or Tommy? No way! They were-

“It’s Foster’s.”

Oliver’s legs gave in, and he landed on his knees, gasping for breath now that his lungs finally filled with air again. He clutched his hand to his chest, trying to get his racing heart to slow down or more particularly back down a little since it was still maltreating his rips in a way that it actually physically hurt him. But this kind of pain was an easy one to take compared to the pain he would have had to take if it had turned out the blood had been one of his loved ones’.

They were still in danger. Cupid and Foster were still a threat to his family. They still had them. Despite everything Oliver felt a wave of relief, knowing that at least the blood wasn’t theirs. He even felt the slightest feeling of pride because if Cupid and Foster’s alliance hadn’t found an early end, it had most likely been Felicity who had hurt him. She had fought the guy who had taken her and Emmy. And that filled his chest with pride.

When Oliver felt a hand on his shoulder, he looked up to find John standing right next to him, looking at him with relief in his eyes that probably mirrored the one in his own. Thea’s sob made his attention focus on her, seeing her cry some tears of relief. And even Barry looked close to tears when he wrapped an arm around Thea’s shoulders, and took in a sniffling breath. Oliver took the hand John reached out for him and let his friend help him to get back to his feet.

“Have you heard anything of the others?” John asked since Oliver still had trouble using his voice with his heart in his mouth.

“They are heading back now,” Cisco answered instead of Caitlin. “Unfortunately, they didn’t find anything and- Wait, there’s an incoming call from an unknown caller. The number is hidden.”

“Patch the call through, and try to backtrack who is calling,” Oliver instructed and took in a deep breath, bracing himself before he heard a clicking in the line, telling him that Cisco had patched the call through, and said, “Hello?”

“Miss me, lover?”

Oliver would lie if he said that he wasn’t relieved that Cupid called again because Cupid calling was giving them something to work on, and that was hopefully bringing them closer to Tommy. And once his baby boy was back in his arms, they could fully concentrate on finding Felicity and Emmy.

“We need to meet,” Oliver stated, ignoring her question. He tried to keep the urgency of his need at bay, but it was still audible in the tension of his voice.

“Yes, we have to, lover,” Cupid answered. “We have a future to plan.”

 

 

Oliver tried to stop the nervous rubbing of his thumb against the fingertips of the same hand, but no matter how many times he formed his hand to a tight fist, he always ended up doing this nervous tick again.

He didn’t like the fact that Cupid had insisted on meeting at the pavilion in the Botanic Garden. It held too many memories of lazy afternoons with Thea before the island and exciting missions with detective Emmy in the last year. And the location didn’t really leave much hope for Oliver to see his son again tonight. Cupid wouldn’t bring him here with her.

Slowly Oliver turned around, trying to find Cupid anywhere here in the park, but he couldn’t see her yet. The park seemed to be completely empty which Oliver knew wasn’t true. He kept himself from looking to the several locations his friends had hidden. They were keeping their distance, but were close enough to be able to watch whatever would happen. He had wanted to go alone, not risking that they could be seen, but everyone had insisted that he couldn’t, shouldn’t and wouldn’t do this alone.

Oliver heard her approaching, but he kept his gaze on the small pond, reminding himself of what Cupid’s shrink had told him back when he had been hunting her the last time. He needed to give her the connection she craved for, but if he was lying, she would know it.

But how could he give her what she wanted without lying to her?

“Hello, lover.”

Slowly Oliver turned around. Cupid stood at the other end of the small pavilion, dressed in her leather coat and armed with bow and arrow, just like Oliver was. But neither of them drew back an arrow. They just eyed up each other. The expression of utter lust in Cupid’s eyes made Oliver tense up even more. The only person whose eyes were supposed to look that longing when looking at him was Felicity’s.

“It’s been a long time,” Cupid added after a while, cocking her head and licking her lips. “You look even hotter than you did the last time.”

Oliver didn’t know what to say, so he went with just saying nothing. At least until it didn’t seem like Cupid was going to continue talking without him adding anything to the conversation. So Oliver cleared his throat.

“You didn’t bring Tom- Oscar?”

“A baby in the park in the middle of the night?” Cupid asked with an amused chuckle. “That wouldn’t be the best idea, would it? But don’t you worry. I took care that our son is safe.”

She pulled out her phone from the pocket of her coat and held it in one level with his eyes. Oliver’s heart skipped a beat at the sight of Tommy sleeping soundly in a sea of stuffed animals. If the video was any indication, Tommy didn’t seem to realize much of what was going on around him. Luckily!

Oliver bit his tongue, scrunching his nose to keep himself from asking, but he couldn’t help himself. “Where are Emmy and Felicity?”

Cupid’s face hardened slightly, and Oliver already cursed himself for asking about them. But what had he been supposed to do? The least he needed was confirmation that Emmy was with Felicity. The thought that Emmy, who would realize so much more than Tommy, was held captive all alone, without her mommy or her daddy being there made the feeling of nausea he was feeling already only worse.

“You don’t need them anymore,” Cupid replied, her voice sounding harsh. “Now that you’ve got me.”

The way that she said that last word made a cold shiver run down the length of Oliver’s spine. He gripped his bow a little more tightly, wishing he could just lift it and force his son’s location out of her, so he could fully concentrate on finding Felicity and Emmy after that, but he knew that no violence would lead her to tell him. The only way she would ever tell him or show him where Tommy was was to make her trust him and believe him when he said that he wanted to be with her.

“So what do you envision for our future?” Oliver asked, not missing the tension in his voice.

“I’d say we make strong, beautiful babies to play with our son,” Cupid replied.

She approached him slowly, eying him up with the same expression of lust in her eyes as before. Oliver stayed motionless, fighting the urge to pull away from her. But he knew that pulling away would minimize his chances of getting Tommy back anytime soon. So he only gripped the bow more tightly.

“Oh, the things I want to do with you right now,” Cupid whispered when she came to a stand right in front of him.

For a few seconds she just watched him. Her eyes took him in like a wild animal looked at his prey. Oliver felt an uncomfortable prickle where her eyes ghosted over his skin. Still he kept unmoving, waiting for her to say something more or do something more. When her hand lifted to his face, her fingertips moving through his stubble, Oliver only sucked in a deep breath.

Felicity and Emmy were the only one who were allowed to do that. They were the only one who were allowed to touch him like this. Well, Tommy was allowed, too, but he hated the stubble, and would gladly give up on the privilege of touching it. The thought almost made a smile appear on his lips, but the pain of knowing his family wasn’t anywhere close to him and he might never see them again, was killing the smile before it even showed.

And then Cupid leaned into him slightly. Her upper body rested against his. Her hand was still on his cheek, her lips so close that all Oliver would have to do to kiss her was ducking his head slightly.

He didn’t want to kiss her. Everything in him screamed and squirmed at the thought to kiss her. In years the only woman he had kissed had been Felicity, and Oliver wanted it to stay like that. He had been a cheater before the island. He had cheated, and he hadn’t cared about the consequences, but he did care now. From the moment he had realized that he loved Felicity – not only had a crush on her or had more than friendly feelings, but really whole-heartedly loved her – he hadn’t kissed anybody else. And he had never wanted to change that, no matter the circumstances.

But Cupid wanted to be kissed. She wanted _him_ to kiss her. He could see it in the way her gaze dropped from his eyes to his lips every now and then. She really wanted it.  
And Oliver knew that he was given no choice.

The moment he closed the distance between their lips Cupid urged herself even closer to him. Her lips moved on his hungrily like she had waited for his kiss forever. Her tongue darted out, moving between the seam of his lips, and Oliver opened up to her. Everything about this felt wrong, but he tried to respond to her as much as possible, trying to fool his brain into thinking that it was Felicity in his arms though the scent of Cupid’s skin, the taste of her lips and the feeling of her body pressed against his made it impossible for him to imagine that it was really Felicity he was kissing. He just hoped that it was enough for his kiss to feel realer or rather real at all since his heart wasn’t in it at all.

He wanted Felicity back! He needed her back to remind him what a kiss was supposed to feel like, what it was supposed to make him feel like. He wanted to feel the comfortable flutter in his stomach instead of the painful cramps. He wanted to feel the perfect way Felicity’s body melted into his when they kissed instead of the forced way Cupid pressed her body to his. He wanted-

Cupid’s lips parted from his, and immediately Oliver opened his eyes, finding her licking her lips with her eyes still closed like she was chasing his taste. She looked content and at peace. Slowly she opened her eyes-

and her expression changed to an angry, unbelieving one.

“You fooled me,” she whispered before Oliver got the chance to ask what was wrong. She took several steps back from him, her eyes never leaving his face. “You set a trap for me.”

Hastily Oliver turned around, seeing around a dozen A.R.G.U.S. agents approaching them with heavy weapons in their hands. His heart started racing once more, remembering Lyla’s words. _We need to be especially careful about Cupid. A.R.G.U.S. wants her back no matter the cost._ He needed to tell her that it wasn’t him and that he hadn’t set up a trap for her.

But the agents were already firing at them. In one quick movement Oliver turned back around to Cupid, wrapped his arms around her and rolled the two of them over the banister of the pavilion. They landed on the hard ground right next to the pond. He felt a pain in his shoulder, and knew that one of the bullets meant for Cupid had hit him instead, but he didn’t care because he didn’t miss the way her wide eyes were still on his face, showing the feeling of betrayal about what he thought he had done.

“Cupid,” he whispered her name urgently over the sounds of the gunshots, but Cupid was already wriggling away from under him.

“Obviously you’re not ready for us to be a family yet,” she stated with cool voice. “So I guess Oscar and I will have to spend some time alone.”

“No,” Oliver whispered, panic rising in his chest at the thought that Cupid was going to leave and take Tommy with her. “No. No, don’t-“

“Goodbye, lover.”

Cupid got up on her feet and started running towards the small forest area that belonged to the park. Oliver wanted to follow her. He wanted to hold her back and tell her that he was going to give her everything she craved for, but his fear was paralyzing him, keeping him where he was still lying on the floor, seeing the woman who held the secret of his son’s location running away while shots were being fired at her.

“Stop it!” he yelled when his thoughts caught up with him. “Stop it! Don’t shoot her! Stop!”

Hastily he jumped up on his feet, trying to get between Cupid and the agents, but he stopped when he heard the earsplitting sound of Laurel’s Canary Cry. He clenched his teeth at the sound, but kept his gaze on the agents that dropped their weapons with grunts of discomfort and put their hands to their ears instead. A red bolt of lightning moved from somewhere in the back of the park past the scene here and right into the forest area Cupid had run off into, too.

“Find him, Barry,” Oliver whispered. “Find Tommy.”

 

 

Felicity pressed her body closer to the doorframe, trying to stay in the shadow while simultaneously moving a little bit forward, so she could get a better sight on what was happening in front of the open front door where Foster was talking to three of the guys she had seen patrolling around the house. He had told her that they were there to protect them and make sure nobody would drive them apart anymore.

Careful not to be caught spying on them, Felicity pushed a little more forward. She pricked up her ears, trying to hear anything they were talking about, but all she heard were muffled voices. So Felicity focused on what she saw which due to the only dimmed light wasn’t too much either.

All four of them had their heads ducked down. They looked serious with deep frowns between their eyebrows. The three guys held their weapons, machine-guns if her eyes didn’t betray her, in front of them like they were a shield. Felicity was more than glad that Emmy was upstairs and asleep because seeing weapons like that was nothing she wished for her little girl.

She hadn’t wished any of this for Emmy or Tommy or herself for that matter.

When she felt the shift in the situation and realized that whatever secret conversation they had out of there was coming to an end, Felicity hurried back into the living room, sitting down in one of the armchairs and busying herself with staring at her fingers like she was trying to figure out which nail polish to apply. She gulped down hard when her gaze moved to her ring finger, hoping to get some urgently needed comfort from the sight of her engagement and wedding ring on her finger and instead found the ring Foster had placed there while she had still been unconscious.

“Hi, Sugar Pie,” Foster whispered with a loving smile that made Felicity’s inside twist and turn painfully. “What you’re doing?”

“Nothing,” Felicity replied hastily, dropping her hands to her lap. “I was just… wondering if maybe I could get a… I don’t know… computer? Laptop? Tablet? Anything to work at? You know, my fingers are itching.”

“Not yet, sugar pie,” Foster whispered, his psychotic smile growing wider, maybe even fonder in some psychotic – there was just no word fitting better than that - way. He sat down on the armrest of the armchair Felicity was sitting in and put a hand to her cheek. Felicity held still, fighting the urge to pull away. “We will wait until we’re somewhere safe. And then, I promise you, you can have everything you want.”

Felicity just nodded. She hadn’t really thought that Foster was going to let her anywhere near a computer. But she had had to at least try.

“I know how much you love computers,” Foster added after a short while, the palm of his hand cupping her cheek in a way he could lift her face and make her look at him again. “You will have as many of them as you want. Tomorrow night I will finish the deal I told you about. And then we’re gonna start all over again.”

And like it was the most natural thing between the two of them Foster leaned forward and pressed his lips to Felicity’s in a firm kiss. Both of his hands framed her face. His thumbs stroked the soft skin over her cheekbones, while his body leaned even closer to hers.

In years Felicity hadn’t kissed anyone else than Oliver, and she hadn’t wanted to ever change that. She hadn’t felt any desire to kiss anyone but Oliver. Because she loved him, and he was the only man she had wanted to kiss for the rest of her life. But pulling away and risking that he would get mad wasn’t an option, either. So she just kept still, imaging to be in Oliver’s arms instead.

God, she wanted to be back with Oliver! Right now! She needed him back to remind her what a kiss was supposed to feel like, what it was supposed to make her feel like. She wanted to feel the pleasant tingling of her skin instead of the painful pricking. She wanted to feel the perfect way Oliver’s body melted into hers when they kissed instead of the way Foster urged himself closer. She wanted-

“Just a few more days, and it’s going to be only the three of us,” Foster whispered against her lips, resting his forehead against Felicity’s. She watched him, while he kept his eyes closed, a content smile forming on his lips at the future he was imagining for them. “But it’s not going to be the three of us very much longer, right? Soon we will give Emmy a sibling to play with, right?”

Felicity felt her heart skip a beat before it started racing in her chest, pounding against her ribs with so much force she had trouble breathing. She had even more trouble than she had had the rest of the day, and it had been hard to breathe already. But Foster’s words… They… She shouldn’t be shocked about them because she had known about this. She had known that he wanted to force her to have a family with him, and-

And yet it scared her beyond everything else that Foster was actually talking to her about having kids. It made her feel nauseated. It paralyzed her. As soon as Foster’s understanding would decrease, and he would demand what he wanted more urgently, he would…

Felicity didn’t even dare to think about what would happen then!

So if she hadn’t been sure before, she knew now more than ever that she needed to find a way out of here as soon as possible. She couldn’t wait for someone to find her or some miracle to happen. She needed to find a way out here – if not a way out for herself, then at least for Emmy. At least Emmy needed to be safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> Realizations  
> Deperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	109. Realizations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies   
> One step forth, two steps back
> 
> WARNING: This chapter contains physical violence against a minor.

“Are you sure you don’t want any painkillers?” Caitlin asked, flinching every time the needle moved through the skin of Oliver’s shoulder. “That has to hurt, I guess.”

Looking at her expressionlessly, he did the last stitch and ripped the suture in two carelessly, not so much as wincing about the pain it caused. Caitlin screwed up her face in disgust, almost the same way Felicity had done years ago when he had ran the syringe into his hurting knee.

“Did we hear anything of Barry yet?” Oliver asked, getting up from the med table and turning towards the computers where John, Laurel, Thea, Roy and Cisco had gathered. He could hear Caitlin following him.

Barry needed to find Tommy.   
Barry just had to find Tommy.   
Barry needed to save Tommy.  
Oliver repeated the same words over and over again in his mind, and he had repeated him for quite some time already like a mantra or maybe more like a prayer.

“If we did, you were the first to know,” Cisco replied, pushing a few buttons on Felicity’s keyboard. “And for the record I expect you to protect me from your wife when she finds out that I touched one of her babies.”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath, ignoring the stabbing pain of longing in his chest at the sound of Felicity’s name. “Anything new on about her at least?”

Cisco shot a guilty gaze over his shoulder, shaking his head.

They had been missing for almost twenty-four hours now. They weren’t even one step closer to finding Felicity and Emmy, and Cupid was planning on leaving the city with Tommy. In twenty-four hours he hadn’t come any closer to find his family again. It seemed like he had only driven them farther away.

He might never see them again. With every passing second his chances of finding his family and getting them back again certainly decreased. Cupid would take Tommy. Foster would take Felicity and Emmy. Well, they had taken them already, but they would take them even farther away, somewhere he might never find them.

“You’re searching for something?” Laurel asked, noticing his seeking gaze before Oliver did himself.

“Emmy’s giraffe,” Oliver replied. “I put it somewhere here, but I can’t-“

“I think I saw it back in the changing rooms,” Roy said.

“I’ll go and-“

“I’ll go get it,” Oliver interrupted his sister, already turning around and heading to the small changing area in the back of the lair.

He needed a second for himself. He needed a second to breathe. He needed a second to clear his mind from what had happened tonight. He needed a second to gather his hope that everything would turn out alright. He needed a second to-  
He just needed a second.

Oliver didn’t even care to switch on the light in the changing room they had installed into one of the smaller side rooms of the lair when the team had grown. He sat down where he had put his clothes when he had changed to head out to the house of Foster’s stepsister. Even in the dark he could see the gaudily pink color of the plush animal, so he hastily reached out his hand and lifted the toy to his nose. Closing his eyes, he breathed in the scent it carried. By now it was more his than Emmy’s, but if he concentrated closely, he could still smell his daughter in the fine filaments.

How often had he promised the three of them or himself for that matter that he would never let anything happen to them? How often had he whispered it to the bump already before the kids had even been born? How often had he whispered it to them when putting them to bed or cradling them to his chest when they had woken up crying?

God, how often had he woken from a nightmare, and Felicity had calmed him down and told him that there was no reason for him to be scared because he would never let anything happen to them. She had such faith in him. How was she going to trust him after he had let this happen to them? How was she ever going to trust him with the kids again?

A quiet knock pulled him from his thoughts. Resting his chin on the plush giraffe, he looked up to see John standing in the door frame, his strong arms crossed in front of his chest.

“I’m not going to ask you if you’re okay,” he stated calmly, “because the answer is written all over your face.”

Oliver nodded quietly, lowering his gaze. He didn’t need to see his picture in the mirror to know that he looked like crap. He felt like crap, so why wouldn’t he look like it?

“Is there anything I can do right now?”

“Can you get them back?” Oliver asked in a hopeless whisper.

“I wish I could, man.”

Of course he wished. John and he, they were brother. John and Felicity shared the same sibling-like bond. They had started this work down here together, or at least almost together, and somewhere along the way they had become a real family. And just like Oliver would do whatever he could to protect Lyla and Sara, he knew John would do the same for his family.

“Do you think she will forgive me?”

“There’s nothing Felicity has to forgive you for, Oliver,” John replied, knowing exactly what his brother meant though the words hadn’t been spoken.

“If my life wasn’t like this-“

“You know, if Felicity was here, she would beat the crap out of you for even thinking like that, right?” John asked with a barely visible smile of amusement and maybe even pride in his voice. “Felicity chose this life, and she chose you – as her husband and the father of her children. She knew what life she chose with that, and she agreed to it anyway. Besides, Foster is part of Felicity’s past, not yours.”

“I should have been there. I should have-“

“Foster almost beat you to death the last time. You probably wouldn’t have been able to stop him if you haven’t been prepared.”

“I should have-“

“Don’t think that way.” John stepped closer, putting a hand to his friend’s shoulder. “You did everything you could. You still are doing everything you can. And sometimes bad things still happen.”

Oliver nodded slowly.

He knew that blaming himself wasn’t going to take him anywhere. It wasn’t going to help him get his family back. Obviously he couldn’t be reminded about that often enough.

“Thank you, John.”

John only nodded, squeezing his brother’s shoulder shortly before he turned around and headed to the door. Oliver took in a deep breath, straightened his shoulders, and walked to follow John back into the main area, the giraffe safely in his hand. He had just put one foot out of the changing room when a by now familiar jolt of lightning chased into the basement right in front of his eyes.

While Barry took off his mask, Oliver hurried to the computer area, already asking, “Did you find Tommy?”

The gaze Barry shot Oliver was enough for him to know that the answer was not the one he had hoped for. How come that whenever he was having the slightest bit of hope, it was crushed again? Couldn’t there anything go right?

“Sorry,” Barry said. “As soon as she realized that I was following her, she changed direction over and over again. I kept following her, but after a while she just stood still and wasn’t moving at all. She watched her phone, and Tommy was crying, so I left. I didn’t want to-“

“You did the right thing,” Oliver explained firmly, nodding more to himself than to Barry. “Tommy’s wellbeing comes first. He shouldn’t be alone.”

“But how are we going to find him now?” Thea asked.

Her red eyes and the way she leaned against a tense Roy told Oliver that his sister had been crying. Part of him felt like he should comfort her, but he really didn’t have any comfort to offer. He himself needed someone to comfort him though he knew that is wouldn’t happen since the missing of the only people who really could comfort him right now was the reason for his sadness.

“I think depending on what direction she ran into first and what area she avoided when she realized that I was following her, we might be able to narrow down where she holds Tommy,” Barry answered. “Cisco?”

“Already on it,” Cisco stated, hastily gulping down the last bit of his coffee before rubbing his hands eagerly and turning around to Felicity’s computers, starting to type almost as quickly as she would. Almost. “Okay, here we’ve got a map of the city. Shoot, Barry. I mean… not literally shoot. You are not supposed to shoot arrows here. We have three other heroes for that, but-“

“Cisco!” Oliver, John, Caitlin and Barry all said in chorus.

“No more coffee for you, I guess,” Laurel stated, taking the half full pot next to Cisco away.

“Hey, the coffee helps me to be in full energy mode,” Cisco replied to her shortly before he looked at Barry again. “Okay, tell me as much as you can say.”

Oliver listened closely while Barry told exactly where Cupid had run, what turns she had taken, and where he had seen her at last. Oliver tried to remember if there were any specific places she could be, any places Cisco hadn’t been able to find connections to in whatever databases he had hacked to do so, but Oliver couldn’t remember. It had been so long since they had done their last research on Cupid. And she had been in A.R.G.U.S. hands for so long-

A.R.G.U.S., Oliver thought bitterly. Did they know what they had done? Did they know that they had risked his son’s life with what they had done? He felt his fist tightening around the pink giraffe’s neck, and hastily eased his grip, feeling some weird need to be gentle to the stuffed animal. He could almost hear Emmy’s voice in his ear, telling him to be careful and not hurt the giraffe.

“Did you hear anything from Lyla yet?” Oliver whispered towards John quietly to not interrupt Barry’s and Cisco’s wild discussions about why Cupid had taken which turn and where that lead them in regards to where she might be keeping Tommy and which places they could cross off.

After Barry had followed Cupid, and the A.R.G.U.S. agents had dropped their weapons at the sound of Laurel’s Canary Cry, Lyla had ordered them to take their weapons and tell her what the hell they were doing. Apparently none of the words Lyla had spoken to Waller about being careful to not endanger Tommy had had any effect on her because she had kept an eye on whatever the team had been working on and sent out some of her agents to disable Cupid. Lyla had gone to the headquarters to talk to Waller once more.

“Waller seems to be upset that Lyla kept information about Cupid from her and is rather helping us than them.”

“Is she going to lose her job?”

“She’s rather willing to lose her job than her godson.”

Oliver nodded. Lyla was a good person with a great heart. Tommy was lucky to have her as a godmother. She had helped Felicity and him so much already.

“Okay, so good half of the city is crossed off,” Cisco summed up the result of Barry’s and his doing, directing everyone’s attention on the screen he was working at. “The rest are all possible locations Cupid could be hiding Tommy.”

“But you can work with that, right?” Laurel asked, leaning over to get a closer look. “You can narrow that further down, right?”

“I hope so,” Cisco replied. “Felicity has really great programs installed here. With the traffic surveillance and the FBI’s facial recognition we might be able to narrow down the whole thing even more.”

“And you need to be fast,” Oliver stated firmly. “If Cupid really wants to leave with Tommy-“

“I’ve got like two pots of really strong coffee in my blood,” Cisco stated, already typing away the necessary codes to start a search, “I’ll work until I find something or at least until I can’t narrow it down any more.”

Oliver gave him a short nod, and Cisco concentrated on his work completely.

“The rest of us is going to-“

“Get some rest,” John interrupted Oliver before he could vocalize his wishes.

Oliver’s head snapped to his friend, looking at him in disbelieve.

Tommy, Emmy and Felicity were still missing. The threat hadn’t disappeared. How could he even think about getting any rest before they were back safe with them? Oliver felt his hand tightening around the giraffe’s neck once more. This time he didn’t feel able to let go, even when he heard Emmy’s voice in his head, reminding him to be gentle.

“We can’t just rest, John,” Oliver said between clenched teeth.

John stepped a little closer to Oliver, so only he could hear him when he whispered, “Right now the only one who had any work to do is Cisco. The rest of us has nothing to do, and we’ve all been on our feet for like forty-eight hours already. We need rest, so when Cisco will find out where to look for Cupid and Tommy, we’ll be at the top of our form.”

“What about Felicity and Emmy?” Oliver asked back. “As long as Cisco is working on finding Cupid and Tommy, we should try and find Foster.”

“It doesn’t make sense without new evidence. We have nothing new to work at,” John answered. “And the fact that it is Foster’s blood proves that Felicity is able to handle herself.”

Oliver took in a deep breath. They all looked tired. He himself felt tired though he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep. He wouldn’t sleep before his family was back safe with him. But if there was a chance that at least the others could get some rest, they should probably take it. It was just that the thought that they were resting and even if only for a short while not doing anything to find them, made his stomach cramp painfully.

“Look, I don’t know if I’ll be able to get any sleep, either. I am not sure anyone will get any sleep, but we need the rest. Cupid and Foster are both dangerous threats. If we are unfocussed in the field when we go at them, it’s not going to help Felicity or the kids.”

Oliver took in another deep breath and nodded. “Fine.”

John turned back around to the others, announcing, “Okay, everyone go home and get some rest. Keep your phones switched on. Cisco-“

“I’ll keep working,” Cisco stated without taking his eyes of the screen or stopping to type. “I’ll call when I find something.”

“Great,” John said with a nod.

“Barry, Caitlin, you can come home with us,” Roy suggested. “The penthouse has enough rooms.”

“What about you, Ollie?” Thea asked her brother. “Are you… coming home with us, too? The house is still-”

“I will wait here until Cisco has found something.”

“Ollie-“

Oliver stepped in front of his little sister, putting a hand on her shoulder squeezing gently, making her stop before she could say anything more.

“I can’t leave as long as they are not back in my arms,” Oliver stated quietly, “but you should go and get some rest.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, and with a nod of his head Oliver leaned forward and kissed his sister’s forehead.

“I’m sure.”

So everyone left, of course not before giving him a hug or squeezing his shoulder or hand and whispering some words that were supposed to be comforting but failed their purpose. The door closed with a loud slam behind them, and everything fell silent except for the even clapper of the keyboard.

For a short second Oliver considered asking Cisco if there was anything he could do to help, but he knew the answer already. He could hear it in his mind, spoken by Felicity as she had often told him that whatever help he thought he could offer her for working with computers was probably not any help at all.

So Oliver stepped back, leaving Cisco whatever room he needed and sat down on the med table with slumped shoulders and lowered head. His gaze fell onto the pink giraffe in his hands.

All he had ever wanted was for his family to be safe. Maybe he should have followed his first instinct. Maybe he should have denied himself a family to spare him and his loved one the pain they were going through right now. Maybe he should have-

Oliver squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his teeth, forcing those thoughts off his mind.

Years ago he had made the decision to be both, Oliver Queen and the Arrow. And he had decided to get married and have kids, and he wasn’t going to take that back. Not only because he couldn’t take it back, but because he didn’t regret it. He didn’t regret to have Felicity, Emmy and Tommy. He wouldn’t give up on them for anything in the world.

It was just that he felt… lost… without them. His whole life revolved around them. He had become a stay-at-home dad because he had wanted to devote his life to his family. He had wanted to devote his life to make sure that they were fine every second of every day. So with them being gone his life felt… empty.

Oliver took in a deep, slightly sniffling breath.

He needed his family back. He was going to do whatever he had to do to get them back. He had lived in the darkness for years, and he was not going to go back there. He was getting his family back and make sure that something like this was never going to happen again. Nobody was ever going to come near his family again. He would make sure of that.

But first he would have to find them. And he would be relentless about it. He wouldn’t indulge until he had found them, no matter what he had to do to find them.  

Oliver lifted the pink giraffe to his face and whispered with a growl from deep in his chest, “I’m going to find all of you. You’re all going to be back safe with me. I promise.”

He breathed in the plush, and this time Emmy’s scent was completely missing, covered by the smell of his own skin. He turned the stuffed animal in desperation, trying to find some remaining of her scent in the fabric, but it was hopeless. And it made his anger only increase.

Anger and desperation, the only two emotions he had been able to feel since his family had been taken from him - they aided one another and complemented each other in an attempt to outdo one another, Oliver thought bitterly while he cried tears of both, anger and desperation.

 

 

Felicity took a deep breath when Foster left the kitchen. The last minutes she had tried her best to blank out the nervous feeling Foster’s gaze on her had caused while she was making breakfast for Emmy and trying to suppress the yawns that threatened to escape her lips. She didn’t want him to ask her whether she hadn’t slept well because she wouldn’t be able to tell him that she had been awake all night, unable to fall asleep with him sleeping right next to her because her fear of what would happen if she closed her eyes had made it impossible to fall asleep, even when he hadn’t touched her and kept some respectful distance.

Emmy had luckily slept through the night. The more the little girl slept, the less she would realize of what was happening around her. And the more she slept, the more energy she would have when Felicity would have finally found a safe way for them to escape. Emmy would need her whole energy then. They both would, but Felicity was sure that she wouldn’t be able to get any rest until they were reunited with Oliver and Tommy.

God, how she hoped her boys were okay! Tommy was still a little baby. He was-

“Mommy.”

“Good morning, sunshine,” Felicity said in a singsong she hoped sounded at least partly as happy and light as she had intended. “Breakfast is almost ready. We have delicious-“

“Mommy?”

Emmy’s voice was so small that it made Felicity turn around to her daughter. Red rims around her daughter’s eyes told her that she had been crying. Hastily Felicity bent down and lifted the toddler into her arms, gently rocking her from one side to the other and rubbing her back comfortingly. She didn’t dare to ask what was wrong since the answer was too obvious.

“Mommy, I miss daddy,” Emmy whispered, her hand forming to a tight fist in the neckline of Felicity’s shirt. “And Tommy. And my giraffe.”

“I know, sweetheart,” Felicity replied, pressing a kiss to her daughter’s head.

Felicity gulped down the tears that were threatening to fall and took in a sniffling breath. She hated that Emmy was feeling like this. It was almost unbearable for Felicity already, and it just had to be even worse for Emmy. She was so much younger. She didn’t know what was going on, and even though she knew something was wrong, she didn’t fully understand why they just couldn’t go back home to her daddy and her beloved baby brother. And Felicity didn’t know how exactly to explain it to her.

“I miss them, too,” Felicity whispered honestly, “but I think we will have to stay here a little longer, okay?”

“No! I don’t want to! I want-”

“Hey, what’s going on here?”

Though Foster’s voice was gentle, Emmy became completely stiff in Felicity’s arm. Hastily she cradled her daughter closer to herself.

“She just had a nightmare,” Felicity explained hastily and was about to whisper to her daughter that they needed to tell a white lie here, but Emmy’s cries were already growing louder.

“I want daddy! I want to daddy to be here! Where is daddy?!”

“Awww, come here, sweetheart,” Foster suggested. “Daddy is here.”

He reached out his hands for Emmy, but Felicity took a step back, holding Emmy even more firmly against her chest because there was no way she would let him touch her little girl. Foster’s eyes darkened slightly at Felicity’s reaction.

“She said she wants her daddy. So give her to me.”

“I got this handled,” Felicity replied tensely and at least as firmly as Foster had, turning away slightly to have Emmy farther away from Foster.

“I want daddy! Daddy!”

“Come here, sweetheart,” Foster said again, following Felicity’s movement, so he was positioned in front of her again.

He put his hands to the little girl’s waist and had already partly taken her from Felicity’s unyielding hands when Emmy completely panicked. She started kicking her feet, and waving her arms around like she was simultaneously trying to push Foster away and trying to find something to hold onto. And she was screaming.

“I want my daddy! Daddy! I miss my daddy!”

It all happened so quickly. One second Emmy was screaming for her daddy, the next she just released a shrilly cry of pain when Foster’s hand hit her right into the face without any warning. The sudden movement made Emmy almost fell to the floor, but Felicity hastily pulled her daughter back into her arms, cradling her close to the side of her body that was farther away from Foster with one arm while she pushed him away with the other arm forcefully, sending him tumbling back some steps.

“Hey!” she yelled at him angrily.

She felt Emmy flinch in her arms at the loudness of her voice before going back to crying with her face hidden against the side of Felicity’s neck. Rubbing her daughter’s back comfortingly like she always did when she was crying, Felicity took a deep breath to control her rage before she stepped closer to Foster, who looked almost as angry as Felicity. Almost.

“Listen to me closely,” Felicity whispered towards Foster dangerously quietly, not stopping to rub her daughter’s back to reassure her that she was here and wouldn’t let her go. “You will never _ever_ touch my daughter again, not mentioning hurt her. Should you ever lay hands on her again, I swear to God it will be the last thing you will have done. I stabbed you once before, and I can guarantee you that if you hurt her again, the knife will go right through you heart. Did I make myself clear?”

“All I was trying to-“

“Don’t you dare!” Felicity hissed. “Don’t you dare defending what you just did like it wasn’t wrong. You will leave us alone now and not come anywhere near us for the rest of the day.”

“Sugar Pie, I-“

“Now!” Felicity said loudly and hastily cradled Emmy closer to her chest when the little girl whimpered quietly and tightened her hold on her mother.

Foster looked at her without saying a word, and for a short moment Felicity wondered if she had taken it too far, and if her mama bear mode had endangered the two of them instead of keeping Emmy safe from any more pain than she had already been put through. But then Foster gave her a short nod and, though he looked angry, he left. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Felicity sank to her knees, Emmy still crying in her arms.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Felicity whispered. “I am so, so, so sorry.”

She carefully loosened her grip on her daughter and made her stand on her own feet before pulling at Emmy’s arms around her neck and pushing her a little away, only far enough, so she could see her daughter’s face. An angry, red mark showed where Foster’s fingers had maltreated her soft skin.

“Mommy?” Emmy asked, her voice sounding even smaller than before between the heartbreaking sobs.

“Yes, baby?” Felicity asked, not daring to call her sweetheart like she usually did after Foster had called her that twice just now.

“I want daddy,” Emmy repeated what she had said over and over again before.

Felicity nodded, stroking her head over the side of her daughter’s face that wasn’t hurt and playing with the short, curly hair. “I miss him, too, baby.”

“And Tommy?”

“Tommy, too.”

“When are we seeing daddy and Tommy again?”

“Soon, baby,” Felicity replied. She leaned forward and kissed her daughters lips, careful not to get close anywhere near the bruise. When she pulled back, she looked at Emmy’s through tears in her eyes. “I promise.”

Felicity pulled Emmy back into her arms, closing her eyes and breathing in the scent of her daughter’s skin, barely being able to hold back the tears she felt springing to her eyes.

She knew what she had to do. Since Foster had kissed her the day before, she had kept thinking about ways for them to escape. She hadn’t found any.

What she had, though, was an idea to at least get Emmy out of here. It was crazy, and she wasn’t even sure that it would work and save her daughter. It might also put her into more danger, but… She knew is that she had to try. Emmy needed to get at least the chance to escape this hell and get back to her father safely.

So her plan was crazy and nothing she would ever do under any other circumstances, but… what other choice did she have?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> Desperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	110. Desperation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies   
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations
> 
> WARNING: I don’t even know what exactly to warn of because I don’t know a fitting word, but maybe an allusion to rape? That being said, we are not going that way here. Nobody will be raped!

“Okay, so where are we with the search for Cupid?” Roy asked when he came into the lair, following his girlfriend down the metal stairs.

“Shouldn’t we wait until Laurel’s here, too?” Cisco asked, turning around on the chair and taking a sip of the fresh-perked coffee.

“Laurel called when we were on our way here,” Lyla answered. “She is meeting with one of her father’s former colleagues who now works for the FBI and is part of the special force built to find Foster after he broke out of prison. He might know more about where Foster is, or what might help us find him.”

“Does Lance know about the abduction now?” Oliver asked.

Lyla shook her head. “No, but he has been asking about Felicity a lot since with Foster out of prison he knows she is a possible target. Laurel told him that you took her and the kids to a short vacation for a few days to distract her and keep her safe. He thinks Laurel just wants to make sure Foster is back where he belongs soon to get him off your mind again. After everything that happened the last time he showed up here, I guess it’s only understandable, so he is doing whatever he can to provide her with the necessary information.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “What is it the colleague might now?”

“We don’t know, but Laurel promised to call as soon as she has talked to him to let us know if there is anything helpful,” Lyla answered, brushing Oliver’s forearm with her fingers gently. “This might be the first step to finding Foster.”

Again Oliver nodded. He didn’t trust his voice. Neither did he trust the hope that he felt rising inside of him. His hopes had been crushed too often these days. He didn’t want to think about what it would feel like if they were no closer to finding them after he had hoped for them to find them by the end of the night or something similar close. He wasn’t sure his heart could take it right now.

For a few heartbeats longer everybody stayed silent. Nobody dared to say a word, waiting for someone else to take the lead and be the first to break the silence.

“Cisco, what did you found?” John finally asked, turning everyone’s attention to the screens.

“Okay, the cameras caught sight of Cupid a few more times. Fist she was heading in southern direction, but then she turned to the west, probably thinking Barry might still be following her. So I could black out this area,” Cisco started, pointing at the screen where a large area was literally blacked out. “The next time she was seen-“

Oliver stopped listening. In some way he still heard what Cisco said and followed the movement of his hands that accompanied his words, but he felt unable to process any of that. His thoughts kept spinning around… around everything probably. The next hours had potential to get him closer to both, Cupid and Foster and hence his whole family. Yet he was scared that if he let that hope grow inside of him, it was going to be crushed again and only make everything worse.

He remembered what it had felt like when he had let Felicity go after their first date had been blown up. Not being with her when he had known that he had feelings for her but thought that it was too dangerous had been hard, but not being with her after he had let the idea of being with her into his heart had been almost unbearable. Having hope that was being crushed was much worse than never hoping for anything.

And he really didn’t want to experience the same feeling now. He was going forth and back between anger and desperation as it was, building hope to have his family back with him soon when they were-

“Ollie?” Thea whispered, taking his hand and holding it between both of hers.

Only now did he realize that everyone was looking at him like he was supposed to say something. As his thoughts had grown louder in his mind, the images of his first date with Felicity that had begun so wonderfully and ended so horribly playing in front of his eyes like a movie, he had stopped paying attention to what Cisco or everybody else had said. So Oliver looked at John in question, knowing his brother and friend would know that he didn’t know what was going on.

“We can’t narrow down the possible locations Cupid could be any more than Cisco did,” John explained indeed. “The area is still too large for us to just go there and hope to find her. The risk that she catches sight of any of us before we found Tommy is too high.”

Oliver nodded, not sure what he was supposed to say about that. He felt like his thoughts were too slow. He felt unable to figure out what to do. He wanted to do something. He knew that they needed to do something. He just… he just felt too tired and empty and lost and hopeless to make a plan right now. He was still willing to up his game and do whatever it took to save them, but he couldn’t get his mind to figure out what it was that they had to do.

“So what do we do now?” he asked, his voice sounding as helpless as he felt.

“I suggest Barry will check the area since he is the fastest,” Caitlin replied. “By far the fastest.”

“I thought we agreed that it was too dangerous,” Oliver remembered lamely.

He felt like his head was filled with cotton wool. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, the crying and the simultaneous inactivity that were making him feel like that. Or maybe it was just the same desperation that made his fingers itch with the need to beat up some people.

“It was, but Caitlin is right. He is the fastest, and if anybody has a chance of scouring the area for Cupid and Tommy without being seen, it’s him,” John agreed with a nod. “We’re running out of options.”

Again Oliver nodded. They were running out of options. Cupid wanted to take Tommy somewhere far away from here. She wanted to-

“Go,” Oliver whispered to Barry with a nod of his head before his mind could get in into the endless loop of repeating the same thoughts over and over again, “find her.”

But at the lack of hope in Oliver’s voice Barry shot a nervous, uncertain gaze to John, who frowned slightly.

“If you have any other idea or have doubts about this-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted immediately, shaking his head. “I… I just wished _I_ could do anything other than sitting here and-“

“That opportunity might come now,” Cisco announced and nodded his head to the screen that told them that a call from Laurel was coming in. With a simple push of one of the buttons on the keyboard, he took the call, saying, “You’re on speaker.”

“Good, everybody better suit up,” she said, sounding a little breathless and from the background noises like she was almost running.

“So you got something?” Lyla was the first to ask.

“Yes,” Laurel confirmed. “According to the agent I talked to right now, Foster’s old gang is planning an arms deal near the docks in one hour. I have the exact location and will send it to you as soon as I’ll hang up. I have my stuff in my car, and will change in there, so we can meet up at the location. We just need to be careful. The F.B.I. will be there, too.”

“Good,” John said. “We’ll all be there. Meanwhile Barry will try to find Cupid.”

“Any luck about that yet?”

“We could narrow down the area enough to make it small enough for Barry to scour it.”

“Great. I have to hang up now. See you later.”

“Yeah,” John said before Laurel hung up. His next words were directed to the people around him. “You heard the plan. Barry, head out. Everybody else suit up.”

Thea squeezed Oliver’s hand she was still holding in both of hers, and when he turned around to his little sister, he saw her smiling at him hopefully.

“Hey, maybe at the end of the night we’ll have all of them back,” she said.

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered. “Maybe.”

“Ollie, you-“

“I guess we should suit up, right?”

Oliver didn’t miss the gazes everyone shot to one another when he turned around, but he didn’t even care. He still felt… weird.

Slowly he went over to where he had left his suit carelessly crumpled up on a chair. He finally had something to do, and he still felt weird like whatever has going to do, wasn’t going to save his family. Nothing he was going to do would be good enough to save them. It was a feeling he knew from long ago, something he had felt before and wished to never feel again. He hated feeling this… helpless.

When he grabbed his bow that he had discarded on the floor earlier, though, he felt the itching in his fingers spread over his whole skin, suddenly making him almost excited like the thought that he would finally be able to do something had been just processed.

Before his break-down the night before he had decided to fight for his family and to do whatever it would take to get them back safe. Now it was time to put those intentions to actions. Tonight there finally was something he could do. All he would need was to get his hands on one of Foster’s guys, and he would beat the location where that bastard held Felicity and Emmy captive out of him.

This was his chance of getting his family back, and he would take it, no matter the cost.

 

 

“I will leave now.”

Felicity didn’t even look at where she knew he was standing in the door frame to what was Emmy’s room in this house. Her eyes never leaving her daughter who she was playing with on the floor, she just adjusted her sitting position to make sure that Emmy was blocked from his view or maybe so he was blocked from Emmy’s view; either way it was the same result.

Only when despite his words Foster seemed to make no attempt to go which she could feel in the uncomfortable prickling in her neck, telling her that he was still watching her, she shot a short gaze over her shoulder. And indeed Felicity saw him still standing there, watching them.

“I thought you wanted to leave,” she said distantly, feeling her rage for what he had done to Emmy awake in her again.

“I am going to,” Foster replied with firm voice, eying her up shortly. “I told the security to come inside and keep an eye on the two of you. Just in case your crazy husband is going to come here. Though I doubt it since he didn’t make any attempt of finding you so far.”

Felicity bit back a snarky comment, pressing her lips together. Threatening Foster had already been risky. She knew that he had lost some of the trust in the balance of their relationship and had come a little closer to the truth of how one-sided their relationship really was. She didn’t want to risk that he was going to hurt Emmy again. Once Emmy was somewhere safe she might stand up to him, but at long as it was possible that she was putting her daughter’s wellbeing at risk with her actions, she would bite back all the truths she would all too gladly shove into this bastard’s face.

“When I am back, we are going to have to talk about our future,” Foster added.

Not answering, Felicity turned her gaze back to Emmy. She had become completely motionless and stiff as soon as she had sensed Foster. Her eyes were lowered to the plasticine they were playing with. Felicity stroked her hand over her daughter’s head gently.

“Fine, and now leave us alone,” she told Foster when he still didn’t move.

Foster stayed unmoving for a few seconds before he turned around and left. Felicity sighed in relief, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to the crown of Emmy’s head.

“He’s gone, baby,” she whispered. “Everything’s alright.”

Slowly Emmy lifted her gaze to Felicity’s face, and her heart skipped a beat when she saw the bruise that had formed on her daughter’s face since Foster had hit her. Tears were forming in the toddler’s blue eyes.

“I want to go home, mommy,” Emmy whispered as quietly as possible, knowing exactly that though Foster had left they weren’t alone.

Felicity glanced over her shoulder shortly, and only when she didn’t see one of the ‘security’ guys as Foster had called them, she whispered back, “You’re going home tonight, Emmy.”

The toddler’s eyes grew wide. “Really?”

“Really,” Felicity promised with a smile, but when Emmy wanted to jump up and screech in joy, she hastily put a hand on her daughter’s lips and her forefinger on her own lips. “It’s a secret between you and me, and nobody can know, okay?”

Emmy nodded seriously, moving her fingers over her lips like they were a zipper like Felicity had done a thousand times when the little girl had told her mother a secret. Slowly Felicity took her hand off her daughter’s lips, giving her another look to make sure she really knew that she had to be quiet, and the toddler nodded.

“There are going to come some guys up here soon, and I will tell them that I will put you to bed and that for you to fall asleep I need to close the door, so they can’t see what we’re doing, okay?”

Emmy nodded, her eyes fixed on her mother’s face to make sure she understood every single thing she was told.

“And when they can’t see us, I am going to open the window and help you out. And you will run to-“

Felicity stopped when she heard the steps in the hallway, and put her finger to her lips once more, wordlessly telling Emmy that they had to be quiet again. The toddler mimicked her mother’s posture, putting her finger to her own lips and nodding.

Watching her daughter being all excited about going home, made her a little more confident about the plan she had made though she still was rather insecure about it. Her plan was crazy to say the least, but right now she really didn’t see another chance to get Emmy back home safe. After the deal would be finished tonight, it would only be harder to get her away from here. So whether this plan was good or not, it was the only plan she had, and it needed to be put into action tonight.

“Mommy?” Emmy asked with a yawn after they had played for some while longer.

“Yes, baby?”

“Can you put me to bed now?”

Felicity didn’t miss the mischievous expression on her daughter’s face. Of course she would do whatever was possible to get to the part of the evening where her mother would put her to bed and whatever else she would do to get her back home sooner.

“Come on, sweetie,” Felicity said and lifted her daughter into her arms before getting up from the floor. “We’ll brush your teeth, put on your pajamas and put you to bed.”

Her heart was beating like crazy when she helped Emmy to brush her teeth and get into her pajamas. What if the plan didn’t work out? What if Emmy got hurt on her way? What if some other criminal took her? What if-

“We’re gonna see daddy again, mommy,” Emmy whispered, putting both her hands to her mother’s cheek like she was trying to comfort her. “And Tommy.”

“Yes,” Felicity whispered. “We’re gonna see both of them again.”

At least she hoped so.

Felicity hastily wiped two tears from her cheeks and then lifted Emmy into her arms and carried her back towards the room that was hers. She tried to move quickly, so it was over sooner, but her heart almost stopped when she had the door closed half the way and-

“The door stays open.”

One of the ‘security’ guys stepped forward, putting his hand against the other side of the door to prevent her from closing it completely.

“She can’t fall asleep if there is any light,” Felicity replied. “She is going to start crying, and then you can enjoy the high-pitched sounds a toddler can make all night. I can only hope you like operas.”

The guy shot a short glance to Emmy, who hid her face against the side of Felicity’s neck. He hesitated shortly before he took a step back.

“You’ve got twenty minutes.”

Felicity nodded, closing the door hastily.

She sat Emmy down on the mattress, throwing her jacket over to her while picking up the toddler’s shoes from the floor.

“Put on your jacket, I’ll put on your shoes,” she ordered.

When shoes and jacket were put on, Felicity grabbed the pen she had taken from the kitchen, and took her daughter’s hand.

“Okay, Emmy, I’ll write down the address of this house here,” Felicity explained. It had taken her some time to figure out the exact address, but she had looked at the map of the Glades so often during her Arrow work, she had at some point memorized it enough to know at least some of the street names. Taking her daughter’s other hand, Felicity added, “And here I am going to draw you where you have to go.”

As soon as the simple map was drawn to her daughter’s hand, Felicity lifted Emmy from the bed and carried her to the window, opening it.

It was still early, earlier than Emmy’s usual bedtime actually. So luckily it wasn’t as dark as it would have been normally. That was hopefully going to make it easier for her to get to her designation.

“Okay, I am going to help you out of the window in a few seconds,” Felicity explained the plan, “and you will walk down the stairs slowly, so you don’t get hurt, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy whispered, nodding her head like she always did when they played in the park and made something their mission with Emmy as the detective in charge. She just loved playing games like that!

“And then you will run in that direction until the street on the left where there is the big trash container, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy replied again.

“And then you will run straight forward all the time until you get to Verdant, okay? You can see it from here. Verdant is not far away. But you really have to hurry.”

“Okay.”

“But don’t run too fast, or you’ll get hurt.”

“Fast, but not too fast,” Emmy repeated the words she had heard her father say during those days in the park often already.

Felicity lifted Emmy’s hand to make her daughter see the plan she had drawn there for her.

“Can you repeat the plan?”

That’s what they always did when they played in the park. They laid out a plan, and when it wasn’t Emmy’s plan, she repeated it. Felicity had always wondered in the back of her mind if maybe this was Oliver’s way to teach their daughter what might be necessary if something like this should ever happen. Whether or not it had been his way, Felicity definitely knew that it came handy right now because Emmy had no trouble repeating the plan, moving her finger across the drawn map on her hand to support her words.

“Right, mommy?” she asked.

Felicity nodded proudly. “Very right. What do you do if you meet someone?”

“I don’t talk to them.”

“What if they talk to you?”

“I don’t talk back.”

“What if they don’t let you get away?”

Emmy opened her mouth to reply but found that she had no answer to that. So she shrugged her shoulders, whispering, “I don’t know, mommy.”

“I am going to tell you what you do,” Felicity announced. “When someone talks to you and won’t let you get away, you tell them that your daddy is Oliver Queen, and he is a rich man. So if they bring you home safe, they get a lot of money. But if they touch you, you’re daddy’s going to be really, really angry, and-“

“Nobody wants mess with angry daddy,” Emmy said the last words, nodding as she remembered that her daddy had told her those words once or twice before.

Felicity took in a deep breath, lowering her nose to her daughter’s head and breathing her in. She still wasn’t sure that this was a good idea. It scared the hell out of her that she was going to let her daughter run through the Glades on her own because even though it wasn’t going to take too long for her to run there, it was still dangerous. But she just saw no other way of protecting her from getting hurt again. So she pressed a kiss to Emmy’s hair and helped her out of the window onto the fire exit stairs.

But Emmy turned back around to her mother with a frown between her eyebrows.

“What about you, mommy?”

“I am going to wait here, okay?”

“No, come with me,” Emmy replied, reaching out her hand for her mother, but Felicity caught her daughter’s hands and only kissed the tips of her fingers. “Mommy?”

“I am going to stay here and make sure these guys out there won’t follow you. You will run to daddy, okay?”

Emmy didn’t look too delighted about the plan, but she nodded and started climbing down the stairs. Felicity watched until she had reached the end of the stairs before she hastily stepped away from the window and adjusted the blanket on the bed to make it look like Emmy was sleeping beneath the blanket.

She sent a quiet prayer to heaven that her daughter would get to her daddy safely before she stepped out of the room and back into the hallway again.

 

 

Everyone was in position, hiding in the shadows and watching the guys. It were four men, all arrested at least once. At least that was what the result of the FBI’s facial recognition program in connection with Cisco’s research had brought to light. Three of them were local drug dealers, wanting to buy the weapons, one of them belonged to Foster’s gang. It was still more than ten minutes until Foster was supposed to show up, and Oliver felt himself growing impatient.

He needed to get his hands on the guy who had kidnapped his wife and his daughter. The sooner, the better! He didn’t want to risk that the same that had happened with Cupid was going to happen here, too. The FBI would not mess up this mission like A.R.G.U.S. had messed up the meeting with Cupid. He wasn’t going to let it happen.

“Any sight of Foster yet?” Oliver asked quietly, not taking his eyes off the criminals in his sight.

“Not yet,” Roy answered. He and Thea had taken positions closer to the streets, so they could inform the rest of the team when Foster and his guys were anywhere to be seen.

But right now everything was still quiet. Too quiet for Oliver’s liking. He wanted the deal to start already. The itching that told him he needed to do something was growing constantly. He just needed to finally do something.

When the guy worked for Foster turned around and back from his customers, Oliver frowned. It was just a feeling, but that feeling told him that something was going wrong, terribly wrong. And his feeling hadn’t been wrong often.

“Spartan, what’s happening?” Oliver asked.

John and Lyla had taken position at the other side of the place, hiding between containers.

“Not sure yet. He’s taking a phone call. I think they-“ John faltered for a short moment when the guy turned back around and said something, neither of them could understand from their positions. They didn’t need to understand, though, since everybody suddenly seemed to be in a hurry to leave. “I think they’re leaving.”

The last syllable had not yet escaped John’s lip when Oliver was already jumping down from his hidden position on the roof of a small warehouse. He was blind for everything that was happening around him, just focusing on his target. Ignoring the voices that yelled at him from over the comms, asking him the hell he was doing, Oliver ducked away from the shots that were being fired at him while running to the one guy he needed to get his hands on in this situation. He disarmed the guy who worked for Foster with two pointed movements and grabbed him by the back of his neck to drag him into the shadows.

“Where is Foster?!” he asked, pushing they guy a little away and against the closest wall. The rage he felt was only more obvious in the modulated voice of the Arrow.

“Oh, I know where he is, but I am not going to tell you,” the guy answered with a grin, but his grin died when Oliver punched him right into the face forcefully. Blood was coming from his nose that was probably broken. The guy threatened to sink down to his knees, but Oliver dragged him back up by the lapels of his jacket.

“I don’t like to repeat myself,” he yelled. “Where is Foster?!”

But the guy still didn’t answer. So again Oliver punched him right in the face. This time he let him sink to the floor, and Oliver himself kneeled down next to him, punching him a few times more until not only his nose was bleeding. And still the guy had the guts to laugh.

“God, you’re never going to find them,” he said with a chuckle, spitting out some blood and a tooth Oliver had knocked out. “Michael’s going to take your family far, far away from here tonight. I’ve seen your wife. I am sure she’s a great fuck.”

Those words were probably just the tip of everything, but they were enough to make him snap right in this second.

That guy knew where Foster was. He knew that Foster was holding Felicity and Emmy. He knew _where_ he was holding Felicity and Emmy. He knew that they were Oliver’s family. He knew what Foster was about to do. He knew what Oliver’s worst nightmare in this situation was. He knew! He knew! He knew! And he wasn’t going to tell him!

Only a few more hours and his family would have been missing for two full days. Oliver had never been a patient man, and right now whatever patience he had had before was gone. He wanted his family back! He wanted them back right now!

So if this little piece of shit in front of him wasn’t going to tell him what Oliver needed to know voluntarily, he would-

“Oliver, stop!”

“Stop it!”

He heard his friends’ voices, but it didn’t stop him. It didn’t stop him from continuing to punch his fists into that bastard’s face over and over again. Even when he felt both, John’s and Roy’s hands on him, Oliver didn’t stop. His hands kept crushing into the guy’s face mercilessly, over and over again.

“Stop it now!” John yelled once more.

And Oliver stopped. He still fought his fiends’ hands, but he let them pull him away from the guy. Only now, with the difference between them, did he realize what he had done.

_He would love to just punch somebody’s, preferably Foster’s, face over and over again until everything that remained was a bloody clump._

That had been what he had been feeling ever since he had learned that Foster was engaged in the abduction of his family, Oliver thought while looking down to the guy that worked for Foster. His face was unrecognizable, a bloody clump and not more.

“He’s dead,” John whispered, and Oliver stopped fighting his friends, looking down to his bloody hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AUTHOR’S NOTE: The timeline gets a little messed up here and with the next chapter, but a lot happens at the same time, so I decided to just write it the way it came to my mind.  
> Also, I know this storyline is getting long. And it might be less interesting than promised, but we are soon getting to the end of it, so just hold on a little longer.
> 
> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	111. A father's heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies   
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations   
> Desperation

The backdoor to the lair slammed shut behind them loudly, breaking the silence that had settled even before they had left the place of crime when the FBI had arrived. Even during the ride back here in the van nobody had dared to say a word.

The tension was obvious in Oliver’s movements when he strolled to the med table. He put his slightly shaking hands onto the cold metal and shifted his weight from his toes to his heels and back to his toes again restlessly. He felt his friends’ gazes in the back of his neck, making his hackles raise in nervousness.

“We haven’t reached anything out there,” Oliver stated in a whisper.

“And the only guy who could have led us to where Foster holds Emmy and Felicity is dead.”

“He said-“

“We all heard what he said, Oliver,” John interrupted him hastily, and when Oliver turned around to his friend he didn’t see any accusation on his face. “It was clearly audible over the comms. And if I had been in your position, I would have probably reacted the same way.”

Oliver turned back around, getting back into the same position as before with his head ducked between his shoulders and his teeth clenched tightly. He waited for John or any of the others saying something more about how he had beaten that guy to death, but nobody said a word. Only his thoughts were screaming loudly at him.

As soon as he had been in the van, he had taken the gloves off, and he had stared at the blood-soaked leather during almost the entire ride home, trying to process what he had done. There was some blood on his hands now, reminding him on what had happened. It had been so long since he had last felt that urge to kill someone. He hadn’t killed in a long time, and he had sworn to himself never to do it again when there were other options and truth be told there were other options almost always. There definitely had been other options tonight. There hadn’t even been a rational reason for him to kill the guy because everything that bastard had tried to do was getting under his skin with what he had said.

Again Oliver stared at his hands. Those hands had killed before. They had killed often, on the island and later here. But he had sworn off killing a long time ago to honor Tommy and only broken that promise if there had been no other way. And when he had learned that he was going to be a dad, he had always taken care that the hands that were holding his children were hands that wasn’t covered with blood.

“Is Barry not back yet?” Laurel asked quietly, breaking the new silence that settled.

“No, but I caught sight of him thanks to the traffic surveillance video,” Cisco replied, just as quietly. “He’s scoured through a lot of the places already. He’s very thorough, I guess to make sure he doesn’t fail to see Tommy or gets seen by Cupid. And speaking of cameras, I think there is a problem up there.”

Cisco pointed at one of the screens where they could see a small group of people fighting in the crowd of all the party people upstairs. The security had trouble keeping the guys in check.

“I’ll take care of that,” Roy said and hastily headed towards the changing areas. Not even a minute later he came rushing back in civil clothes, wiping away the dark color from around his eyes with the dark fabric of his shirt. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Roy was more than glad to be able to escape the lair for a few minutes.

Ever since Felicity and the kids had gone missing he felt himself being on the edge to… he didn’t even know what he was on the edge of, but he knew he was of the edge of something. Everybody was. It was probably the most obvious with Oliver, but everybody was on the edge since they had been taken.

During the little rest they had gotten, Thea had cried her eyes out, and if Roy hadn’t swallowed down his tears again and again, he would have cried with his girlfriend.

Felicity was a friend, more than a friend actually. She was like the sister he never had. She had been for a long time. Oliver was his mentor. Emmy even carried his last name as her middle name. He had spent so much time with the kids, they were part of his family just like Thea and the entire team was.

When he had heard what that guy that had worked for Foster had told Oliver, Roy had felt like he had been under the influence of Mirakuru again. If Oliver hadn’t beaten that guy to death before he and John had reached him, Roy would have gladly packed a few punches, too. And John had looked like he had felt the same.

As soon as Roy saw where the security still had trouble to keep all the fighting people off each other’s throats, he hurried towards them, grabbed the one that seemed to make the most trouble by the back of his collar. The guy turned around in an attempt to punch him, but Roy fought off the punch easily, and only held the guy in an even tighter grip.

“Party’s over for all of you,” he stated, looking into the faces of the other guys who have been fighting and were held in the grip of the security staff now.

“But we didn’t-“

“Do anything,” Roy finished the sentence with a roll of his eyes while he was turning around and dragging the guy he held to the entrance. The rest of security followed him with the other fighters. “It’s always the others, isn’t it?”

They guided the guys outside and down the stairs in front of the main entrance. Roy nodded to the security staff in thanks, wordlessly telling them that he would handle the rest on his own. So they left and went back into the club.

“I don’t want to see either of you here ever again,” Roy stated, pointing at the five guys in front of him. “All of you are banned from the club.”

“But we-“

“Look, I am really thin on patient these last days,” Roy explained, forming his hands to tight fists next to his hips. “And if you don’t buzz the hell off right now, I swear to God you’re gonna regret it. Oh, and I have Captain Lance on speed dial, so if you’re not interested in spending the rest of the night in jail, I’d advise you to leave now and don’t get into any more trouble here.”

The five adolescents didn’t seem too delighted about the idea to just leave, but they did turn around and leave without any other word. Roy watched them go, remembering how only a few years ago he had been like them, maybe even worse. Making trouble had been his daily business. But then Oliver had given his life a purpose, and his whole life had taken a turn to the better.

Roy pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, rested his head back and took in a deep breath. He knew that eventually he had to go back downstairs into the basement, but right now he just needed a second for himself. He didn’t want to go back yet, and see the desperation in Oliver’s eyes and the sadness and worry in Thea’s.

He knew the situation was dangerous, and he would lie if he said that he wasn’t scared, but he had hope that everything would turn out to be okay.

Because Felicity was tough. It was one of the first things he had learned when joining the team. Everybody trusted her, and there was a good reason for that. He had learned that really early. He himself had trusted her with thinking that he had chased Thea away to Europe after Slade’s attack on the city and thinking that he had killed Sara.  
So Felicity might be able to take whatever she was faced with, but if what that guy that had worked for Foster had said was going to turn out true, Roy doubted that-

Hastily he shook his head. He couldn’t think like that. It was enough that Oliver seemed to be caught in the worst scenarios of what was happening and how the whole thing would play out. He couldn’t join him in that dark place. He had to keep a cool head like John had said. Losing their minds wasn’t going to help Felicity or the kids.

So Roy took in another breath of the cold air, rubbed his hands through his face and turned around to head back to the lair and see what they would do now. He had already taken the first step when he frowned and turned back around, looking into the almost dark street that lead to the club.

He had to narrow his eyes to see clearly and make sure that it wasn’t just some garbage moved by the wind, but, no, there really was a kid running in his direction. Roy took a few steps back, so he was standing on the street in front of Verdant again, and focused his gaze on the little human-being running right towards him.

Roy felt like frozen in place. This couldn’t be. It just wasn’t possible.

The red jacket – no, no jacket! A coat as Thea had told him – was the first thing he recognized. He had been present when it had been bought. Thea and Emmy had dragged Tommy and him from store to store. Tommy had been lucky! He had been able to sleep in the baby carriage the entire time, but Roy himself had to stay awake and endure every single second of the girls’ shopping spree awake.

“Uncle Roy!”

Only now was he able to move. He ran the few feet that were separating him from her, and as soon as he had reached the little girl that had obviously grown tired as her steps had become smaller and smaller and she had almost tripped over her own little feet at the end he hauled her up into his arms while she was wrapping her arms around his neck and snuggling her face to his shoulder.

“Hi!” he breathed with a relieved chuckle. “God, I missed you like crazy! We all did! How did you make it here? And where is-”

Emmy leaned back in his arms slightly, to look at him. Her breathing was fast, and her cheeks were turned red, both probably from running. What definitely didn’t come from running, though, was the bruise on the side of her face. Roy eyed it up carefully. It didn’t look too bad, but he was sure that it had to hurt her. The skin was even slightly swollen.

“Where did you get-“

“Where’s daddy?” Emmy interrupted him, her gaze moving around to find him. “I want daddy! I need-“

“Okay, okay,” Roy soothed her, stroking a hand over her back and kissing her forehead. “I’m gonna take you to daddy, okay?”

“Yes,” Emmy said with a sigh.

She rested her head back to his shoulder and tightened her arms around his neck like she was scared that he was going to let her down or someone would take her from him. Roy tightened his arms around her in response, too. He didn’t want to picture what she had been going through these last hours.

“Your daddy’s going to be so, so happy to have you back,” Roy said into the toddler’s ear when carrying her inside.

At the sound of the loud music, she pressed herself even closer to his chest, whimpering quietly. Roy wrapped his arms around her as tightly as possible, whispering words of comfort into her ear.

“Don’t worry. We’re soon going to see your daddy. And nobody is going to-“

“Uncle Roy?” Emmy asked, almost yelling it into his ear over the loud music.

“Yes?”

“I’m thirsty.”

Roy pressed a kiss to the side of Emmy’s face that wasn’t bruised. “We’re gonna make a slight detour to the bar then. What can I get you?”

“Cuba Libre with umbrella.”

Roy chuckled. “I think your dad will kill me if I give that to you. How about we go one easier, and you get a Coke with umbrella.”

“Okay,” Emmy answered.

Roy hurried behind the bar and poured her the drink, adding some ice cubes and a drinking straw to the umbrella before he handed Emmy the glass. She took it in both of her hands and started drinking eagerly. Roy grabbed the bottle of coke to take with him in case she would need more later and hastily went to the door to the basement, hitting in the code to open the door.

 

 

Oliver moved his fists down onto the cold metal of the med table violently and wiped the surface free of the items on it. The crashing sound of things being tossed to the floor ripped through the silence forcefully. Oliver felt the ache of his muscles from not moving for several hours when he did so, but he only clenched his teeth, gripped the edge of the table and overthrew it easily. The strength of his movement made the table move several feet away.

“Hey, calm down, man!” John yelled, stepping closer to him without touching. “Losing your head is not going to help bring either of them back and-“

“How are we supposed to find them now?! How are we supposed to find them when we lost the one lead we could have had when I lost it out there?! And how-?!”

“Daddy!”

Oliver felt his heart skip a beat. His gaze snapped to the metal stairs immediately. From where he was standing he couldn’t see the head of the stairs from where he was sure his daughter’s voice had come, but he didn’t feel able to move, either. He was like frozen in place, unable to move.

But he didn’t have to move anyway because only a heartbeat after he had fallen silent Roy came hurrying down the stairs, Emmy in his arms. While jumping down the last three steps, he took the glass she held in her hands from her, and let her down on the floor before the wildly struggling girl could fall.

“Daddy!” she exclaimed again, spreading her arms and running right at him.

With a sob he had been holding for too long Oliver let himself drop down onto his knees and caught the toddler easily. He wrapped his arms around his daughter so tightly, a little voice in his mind was screaming for him to ease his grip if he didn’t want to strangle her or break her neck with the force of his arms around her tiny body. But still he didn’t ease his hold on her. He couldn’t.

After not being able to hold her for so long this was exactly what he needed. He needed her warm body to be pressed against his, so he could feel her wild heartbeat against his chest. He needed his arms wrapped around her body to crash her close to his chest where he knew she was safe and nobody could take her from him. Still he got the weird feeling that maybe this was all a dream and his mind was making him see unreal things to ease the pain of not having his family here, so Oliver turned his face to her neck, breathing in the scent of her skin that the pink giraffe had been missing lately. And it was everything he needed to know that Emmy really was here with him.

He started peppering the side of her face with lots of kisses, making her giggle and shout out, “That tickles, daddy!”

But Oliver didn’t stop because Emmy was back home. She was home with him where she belonged. And he wouldn’t stop kissing her until he was sure that she knew that she was safe because now that she was here, there was nothing that could make him let go of her again. She was safe and she was unharmed- Was she unharmed?

Hastily he put his hands to her hips and pushed her far enough away, so he could move his hands all over her body carefully, checking for any injuries while asking simultaneously, “Are you okay? Are you hurt? Is there anything-“

As soon as he saw the bruise on her face, Oliver stopped. Gently he put his fingers to her chin and turned her face a little to get a better look at the dark red, slightly blue color that spread from the outer edge of her left eye down over the side of her face to her jaw. The skin was slightly swollen.

“Emmy, what happened?” he asked, his voice sounding hoarse – whether from the rage he felt at the thought that somebody had dared to hurt his daughter or from the tears that had fallen from his eyes, he wasn’t sure.

“Don’t cry, daddy,” Emmy said instead of replying to his question, putting her hands to his cheeks and wiping away the tears.

Oliver closed his eyes, relaxing into his daughter’s touch because – god, he had missed her gentle touch on his skin so much! Even more than he had known! Her fingers moved through his stubble slowly, and when her lips pressed a firm kiss to his, it almost made him forget all the pain he had felt in the last hours. At least for the break of a second until he remembered the bruise on his daughter’s face.

He opened his eyes, willing to repeat his question about what had happened though he had a good idea of why that bruise was on her face. But he made up his mind.

“Emmy, where’s mommy?” Oliver asked, pulling the toddler back into his arms and against his chest.

Immediately Emmy lifted her hands with her open palms to him, showing him the writing on the one hand and the drawing on the other. “That’s the address and the plan, so I could find you. Mommy wrote it.”

“And you did find me,” Oliver said, kissing the tip of Emmy’s nose and then her lips. “I am so proud of you.”

“Are we gonna get mommy and Tommy back?” Emmy asked.

“We will,” Oliver said firmly. “I promise.”

Emmy was back home, and he was going to get the rest of the family back, so they would all be reunited. Emmy had found her way back home to him, and he would make sure that the rest of his family was back, too. Emmy being back here had given him hope, hope that despite all the mess everything might turn out okay at the end.

“First we gotta show your hand to Cisco because-“

When Oliver got up, lifting Emmy into his arms while doing so, he looked around into the faces of their friends for the first time since his daughter’s voice had called all his attention. Everybody had tears in their eyes if they weren’t even streaming down their faces and-

“Daddy?”

Oliver turned his face back to his daughter, looking at her in question at the frown on his little girl’s face.

“Daddy, are you wearing mommy’s make-up?” Emmy asked, eying him up and down and suddenly making wide eyes as her hands started pulling at the hood, pulling it over his head and into his face. “You’re the Arrow.”

It was only a whisper, showing that she couldn’t believe it. She had always adored the Arrow on TV, following the news closely when they talked about him. She hadn’t understood most of it since she wasn’t even three years old which you forgot easily when talking to her, but she had tried to grasp as much as possible about the Arrow, the city’s guardian angel and her personal hero and idol. It had always warmed Oliver’s heart how much his girl admired the secret identity that had brought a lot of pain over him at the beginning.

Emmy kept moving her hands over Oliver’s face, pushing the hood back a little, so she could look into her daddy’s eyes when she asked him, “Are you, daddy? Are you the Arrow?”

Oliver tasted the lie he was about to tell at the tip of his tongue. Felicity and he had agreed a long time ago that as long as the kids were still so young they shouldn’t know about their parent’s secret nighttime job. The danger of Emmy babbling it out was too high. But now he was standing here in his Arrow gear in front of her, surrounded by his equally suited up friends and family, and with hit smart daughter in his arms. How was he supposed to lie to her?

“Yes,” he said. “Yes, I am the Arrow.”

Emmy’s smile spread over her whole face. “Cool!”

Everybody chuckled while Emmy pressed a short kiss to her daddy’s lips and then turned around in his arms to see who else was there. Of course she knew all the heroes’ names because they were friends of the Arrow, and she just knew everything about the Arrow. Actually, most of them had even visited her on Halloween when no dressed up kids had shown up, much to her disappointment. So she whispered the names of the heroes around her while Oliver kissed the side of her face that wasn’t bruised.

When Emmy’s gaze moved to Laurel, she frowned. “Pretty Bird’s Black Canary?”

“She is,” Oliver replied between two kisses.

“But then who’s mommy?” Emmy asked.

Oliver smiled at how naturally his daughter thought of Felicity as a hero when he answered, “Mommy’s Overwatch. She’s usually working from behind the computers.”

Emmy looked at Cisco who sat behind the computers instead and frowned slightly. She was about to say something, probably asking why Cisco was sitting in her mommy’s place then, when Barry appeared in a struck of lightning only a few feet away. Immediately Emmy’s arms came wrapping around her daddy’s neck tightly, scared that there might be any danger or she would be taken from him again.

“It’s okay,” Oliver calmed her hastily, still tightening his hold on her to make her know that she was safe. “It’s just-“

“Uncle Barry!” Emmy exclaimed when Barry took off his mask and looked at the toddler with wide eyes before looking around in need of someone to explain what the little girl was doing here.

“She came running right towards me when I was kicking some idiots out of the club,” Roy answered.

“And she has Felicity’s location written on her hand,” Cisco added, getting up from his chair to read what was written on Emmy’s hand.

While he went back to the computers and located the address on a map on one of the screens, Barry said, “That’s good. Because I have found Tommy.”

Oliver felt his heartbeat fastening. With Emmy in his arms and realizing that so many people in her family and so many of her friends were superheroes he had been distracted from the thought that there were two more family members that were still in danger. But not much longer. When they knew both of their locations now, they would know exactly what to do.

“We’re gonna split up,” he announced. “The sooner we get both Tommy and Felicity back, the sooner this nightmare is over once and for all. I suggest Roy, Thea, John, you are going with Barry to get Tommy back. Lyla and Laurel, you come with me to get Felicity back from Foster.”

The others nodded in agreement, already starting to put their masks back on or suit up in Roy’s case. As much as they wanted to welcome Emmy home like Oliver had gotten the chance to they knew that time was running out for Felicity and Tommy, and with Emmy being safe they were priority right now. They needed to get them back before either one of them could be hurt or taken out of the city.

Oliver stepped closer to Caitlin and Cisco, asking Caitlin, “Can you take care of her while I am going out?”

“Sure,” she answered, rubbing her hand over Emmy’s back comfortingly. “I’ll take a look at the bruise, too.”

“That would nice. Thank you.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to Emmy’s lips and said, “Caitlin and Cisco are going to take care of you for a little, okay? Daddy needs to leave, but it won’t take long, and I’ll be back in no time with mommy and Tommy.”

He attempted to hand Emmy over to Caitlin, but the little girl held onto the fabric of the leather jacket tightly, clinging to her father for dear life. Her arms came wrapping back around his neck tightly, fingers clawing into his clothes when she whined, “Daddy, no, I’ll come with you!”

“Emmy, you can’t come with me,” he explained quietly, rubbing her back comfortingly and kissing the side of her face. “I’ll go get mommy. And it might be a little dangerous, so you cannot come with me. I don’t want you anywhere near that bad guy.”

“But I want to come!” Emmy insisted with another whine.

Oliver took in a deep breath, saying, “You know, it has to be a secret that daddy’s the Arrow, and if you’re coming with me, probably everybody will know.”

But Emmy kept clinging to him, even crying quietly.

Oliver screw his eyes shut. He didn’t want to leave Emmy, especially not when she was crying. The little girl had been through so much already. He didn’t want to put her through more pain than she had already been through by leaving her so shortly after she had found him.

But Oliver really wanted to get to Foster and punish him for what he had done to him, to Emmy, to Felicity. The words of the guy who had been working for him were still echoing through his mind, and if any of that turned out true, Oliver _needed_ his hands on Foster. And even if it – hopefully – turned out to be a lie, Oliver had to help getting his family back. If he didn’t participate in finding them, he would forever blame himself. He couldn’t ask the others to risk their lives and stay back here safe. Probably nobody would blame him, but he would and that would be even worse than the blaming of any other.

“I gotta make sure that mommy comes back home safe,” Oliver explained. “John and Thea and Roy and Barry will take care that Tommy comes home. And daddy will take care that mommy is soon back home. Lyla and Laurel will help me with that, but I need to go with them.”

“No,” Emmy whined. She let go of him a little bit, but only enough so she could look at him with eyes full of tears. “Daddy, don’t go.”

The words broke Oliver’s heart, but he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his daughter’s forehead saying, “I’ll come back.”

“Promise?”

Emmy had never reminded him more of her mother than right in this moment. She looked at him the way Felicity had looked at him years ago. Even her voice sounded so similar to her mother’s that it sent a chill shiver down Oliver’s spine. Back then he hadn’t answered. He hadn’t made a promise to Felicity that he hadn’t been sure he could keep.

But this time was different because there was no way that he wouldn’t make it back.

So he looked Emmy deeply in the eyes, and replied, “I promise.”

He kissed both of Emmy’s cheeks, carefully avoiding the bruise on her face before he handed her over to Caitlin. This time she let go of her daddy and moved into Caitlin’s arms willingly.

“You’re ready?” Laurel asked Oliver, winking at Emmy, and the toddler giggled slightly, resting her head on Caitlin’s shoulder and playing with a strand of her hair tiredly.

“I just need a minute,” Oliver replied, hurrying to the changing areas.

He came back with the pink giraffe in his hands, and he smiled when Emmy reached out her hands for the stuffed animal immediately. As soon as she had taken hold of it, she crushed it to her chest and snuggled back up to Caitlin.

“The giraffe smells like you, daddy,” she said with a smile, keeping the stuffed animal close to her nose, so she could keep smelling her daddy. “Do you really have to go?”

“I’m gonna be back soon,” Oliver whispered, stroking the tips of his fingers over her soft cheek. “Cisco and Caitlin are going to take good care of you, okay?”

Emmy nodded tiredly, so Oliver leaned over and kissed the little girl’s cheek once more, whispering into her ear that he loved her. He watched her for a short second longer, feeling his heart aching at the thought to leave her now.

Still, he turned around and nodded his head to the door, saying, “Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	112. The last kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies   
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations   
> Desperation   
> A father’s heart

When the door slammed shut, a forceful wince ripped through Felicity’s body, making her hands shake so wildly that the tea swapped over the rim of the mug between her fingers and onto her jeans. Hastily she wiped the wetness the hot liquid had left away a little and put the mug to the couch table. Her legs were shaking when she got up from the couch.

Felicity glanced at her watch. Emmy had left approximately half an hour ago. She must have already reached Verdant, and hopefully she had found Oliver and told him where Foster was keeping her mommy captive, so the team could come and get her. Felicity sent another prayer to heaven that her daughter really was okay, and none of the other criminals in the Glades was holding her captive now. And she was about to send another prayer to heaven that Tommy was okay, too, when the door to the living room was ripped open, slamming against the door loudly.

Her heart stood still for a very long heartbeat before it started racing in her chest wildly. Foster looked angry, more than angry actually. There was a rage in his eyes Felicity had barely ever seen on anybody. And when she had seen it, it hadn’t ended well.

“What happened?” she asked quietly, barely hearing her own voice over the rushing of blood in her ear.

“Queen and his friends busted the deal,” Foster growled. “I tried to find some new customers, but with the FBI in the back of our necks they are all too scared to get caught. And the fact that Queen killed one of my guys is not helpful, either.”

Felicity’s breath caught in her throat. Oliver had killed again. After all this time that he had done his best to always find another way and to never break the promise he had made to himself after Tommy had died, Oliver had killed again. He must have been so desperate! He must have-

“Put on shoes and your jacket. I am going to get Emmy. We are leaving tonight.”

If her heart had been beating wildly before, it was completely out of control now.

“It’s late. Emmy’s sleeping,” she said hastily, a fraction of the panic she felt rising inside of her audible in the tone of her voice. “Maybe we should let her sleep and wait until tomorrow before we-“

“And risk that we get caught in the meantime?” Foster asked angrily. “We have the FBI and the craze leather troop in our backs. I am not risking that you will be taken from me again. We’re leaving. _Now_.”

Without another word Foster turned around and headed to the stairs, intending to get Emmeline from the bed she wasn’t lying in because Felicity had helped her escape. She had hoped that Emmy not being here wouldn’t be noticed until the next morning. And in that case the team would have had much more time to come here and get her, maybe even before Emmy’s missing presence would have been noticed. And there was nothing Felicity could say to stop Foster from going up the stairs.

Felicity took a look around, trying to find anything she could use to defend herself. But there was nothing that could be used for that purpose. The tea wasn’t even close to hot enough anymore to do any damage. And Foster had taken all the knives and even the forks away when Felicity had ignored him the whole day. Her only possibility to defend herself against whatever was about to come – and given the murderous expression she had seen in his eyes she was sure that something was about to come – was using her own body, but it had just been too long since she had had her last training and even then it had more been a foreplay to hot lair sex than actual training and-

Her thoughts came to a sudden stop when she could hear the quick steps upstairs coming closer again. When Foster’s voice boomed through the quiet house, calling for the guys who had been supposed to watch her and Emmy to come in, Felicity winced once more and instinctively took a step back, only wincing once more when her back bumped against the wall.

The moment the two armed guys came into the living room from the hallway, Foster reentered the room from the kitchen.

“Where is the girl?”

“She took her to bed,” one of the guys answered, nodding his head in Felicity’s direction.

Immediately Foster’s eyes snapped to Felicity’s face. The rage seemed to multiply with every second he kept staring at him. Two heartbeats long Felicity wondered what he would do now before he took a step towards her.

The second his hand darted out to wrap around her throat, Felicity moved. Her body reacted in a way she had been taught long ago. Her mind might have forgotten what John and Oliver had told her at the very beginning of her work in the Arrow cave, but her body seemed to remember clearly. She used her left arm to fend his hand away and crashed her right fist into his face before the courage could leave her again.

“You damn bitch!”

Foster caught himself quickly. He took his hands off his face where her fist had hit it and approached her again. When Felicity tried to fight him this time, he easily slapped her hands out of the way and gripped her throat tightly like he had intended it the first try already. He pushed her against the wall violently, making her slide up the wall, so her toes were barely touching the floor anymore. Felicity’s hands moved out to push him away, her nails digging into the skin of his wrists to ease his grip on her, but neither of it helped. His hand stayed where he had put it around her throat, tightening with every second until Felicity could barely breathe anymore.

“Where is the girl?” Foster asked.

Whatever sick form of love and gentleness his eyes had shown in the first hours after the abduction was completely disappeared and replaced by the most murderous expression she had ever seen by now.

“Where is the girl?!” Foster screamed at her, drops of spit meeting her face.

Even if she wanted to, she wouldn’t be able to answer. Felicity still kept struggling against him, but nothing she could do made him ease his grip on her throat. Her urge for air was so desperate by now that her lungs felt like they were on fire and black spots were dancing in front of her eyes, telling her that she was about to lose consciousness.

“Where the hell is the girl?!” Foster screamed into her face once more.

Despite the fact that most of her vision was taken by the black spots and she was barely conscious by now Felicity didn’t miss the feeling of the cold metal pressing to her temple and the sound of a gun being cocked right next to her ear.

“I don’t like to repeat myself! Where is the girl?!”

Felicity fought the unconsciousness as much as possible, so she could open her mouth in an attempt to say something. The little air she got despite Foster’s tight grip was by far too less to allow her to speak, though. So Foster gave her a pointed look, leaving no doubt that any lie or scream would be punished, before he eased the grip on her throat a little, allowing Felicity to suck in a much needed breath.

“So?” Foster’s angry voice demanded. “Where is she?”

“She is where she belongs,” Felicity explained, a slight smile of proud playing on her lips because she could feel in her heart that it was true. “She’s with her father.”

Foster drew back his fist, and Felicity could almost see it moving towards her face for a punch already when suddenly an earsplitting sound she knew all too well since she had heard it thousands of times over the comms already through the silence of the house. Foster’s grip eased off from around her throat completely when he moved his hands to cover his ears and protect them from the sound. Felicity slid down the wall, coughing and gasping for much needed air. Her hands wrapped around her sore throat, and she squeezed her eyes shut for a few moments to chase away the black spots that were still dancing in her vision.

When Felicity was able to open them and actually see something again, she saw Laurel and Lyla fighting the two armed guys while Oliver was fighting Foster. Her eyes kept watching Oliver though the lack of oxygen before was still making it hard for her brain to keep caught up with everything she saw right now, though. One moment Oliver was fighting Foster with his bow, disarming him and sending the gun flying through the room where it landed on the floor, the next he was already drawing back his bow and aiming an arrow right at his heart.

“Oliver, don’t!” Felicity yelled with strength she hadn’t thought her voice would be able to show.

Immediately Oliver froze in the position with his bow drawn back and the arrow aimed at Foster’s heart. He didn’t turn around to her, but he also didn’t let go of the arrow. From the corner of her eyes, she could see Lyla and Laurel leading the other guys away, probably finding a nice place to handcuff them to for when the police would come and get them. Felicity nodded to her friend when she felt Laurel’s questioning eyes on her, asking if she was okay.

When it was only Oliver, Foster and her in the room, Felicity whispered against the ache in her throat, “Don’t do it. He’s not worth it.”

When Foster had kidnapped her the last time, Oliver had been about to beat him to death. His fists had crashed into Foster’s face again and again mercilessly. And Felicity had asked him to not do it. She had told him that he wasn’t worth it. And although Foster’s death might have spared them all of this, Felicity didn’t regret that she had held him back from killing him because she knew as confident as Oliver might feel about killing someone in the heat of the moment, he would regret it as soon as his mind would have come to a rest.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver lowered his bow slowly when-

“I knew you didn’t have the stones to do it,” Foster said with an almost amused chuckle.

Felicity winced when Oliver suddenly let go of the arrow, shooting it high between Foster’s thighs before he took the next arrow, tying the suddenly all too silent criminal in a tight rope.

Relieved Felicity took in a breath about to whisper something more when the ache in her throat made her cough wildly once more. Within the split of the second Oliver dropped his bow to the floor with a clattering sound, and the next moment he was kneeling in front of her, putting his gloved hand to her cheek and whispering, “Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe.”

Onerously Felicity got her breathing back under control. She laid her hand over Oliver’s on her cheek and watched him. He was eying her up with a worried expression in his eyes, checking her for any injuries. And at the same time he was keeping his distance like he was afraid to touch her.

“Emmy found you,” Felicity stated in a whisper.

Oliver nodded. “She was so brave!”

“And Tommy?” Felicity asked, and her heart hurt with how strongly it was beating against her rib cage. All the time she had worried about her baby boy. Of course she had worried about him! She was his mother. But she hadn’t been able to allow the thought too close to her because she had had to concentrate on Emmeline. Emmy had been with her, and Emmy had been the one Felicity had been able to do something for. But now that she was safe and Emmy was safe, all her thoughts revolved around Tommy. “Please say he’s fine.”

“Thea, Roy, John and Barry are getting him right this second,” Oliver answered, wiping a tear that had escaped the corner of her eye away. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay,” Felicity assured. “I’ll be better when I have our kids back in my arms, but… I’m okay.”

And that seemed to be all the confirmation Oliver had needed. In one swift movement he crashed Felicity against his chest, cradling her to him safely, and got up from the floor, so Felicity’s feet were swinging several feet above the floor. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, her face hidden against his shoulder. Felicity knew that Oliver’s arms were holding her more tightly than was probably good for her ribs or her still struggling lungs, but she didn’t care. She didn’t want the slightest bit of distance between them.

“God, I missed you so much,” Oliver breathed against her skin, peppering her jaw with little kisses that Felicity knew where supposed to make the pain Foster’s hands had left there go away. She could hear tears in his voice, and it only made her tighten her grip on him, reassuring him that she was right here in his arms where she belonged. “I was so worried. I thought I’d never see you again and-“

“I know,” Felicity replied, just as breathlessly as Oliver. “I was so scared to let Emmy go alone and-“

“She made it home safe,” Oliver interrupted her immediately, pressing her closer to his chest. “You did the right thing.”

“And Tommy?”

“We’ll get him back,” Oliver promised. “We’ll get him back, and everything will be alright again, and-“

For the break of a second everything was silent, and Felicity was just about to ask Oliver what was wrong, when he suddenly turned them around, so her back was pressing against the wall. When Oliver himself turned around, so his back was pressing against her chest and his body was shielding hers, she could briefly see that Foster had cut his ropes off and was standing with his gun aimed at them. But it all happened too quickly for either for them to react. One moment Oliver had been swirling her around in joy of finally being reunited with her, the next a single gunshot was heard.

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut, holding onto the back of Oliver’s hood jacket for dear life. She didn’t want to see him die. She didn’t want to see him going down on his knees and-  
But Oliver didn’t sink down on his knees. She could hear his erratic, exhausted breathing. She was sure that the bullet had hit him, but Oliver kept standing in front of her, his body shielding his.

“Not bad, Queen,” she heard Foster say. “I didn’t think you’d had that much strength in you.”

Another gunshot could be heard, and Oliver groaned loudly, while all Felicity could do was stand there, caged between the wall and Oliver whose weight was sinking more and more into her. Sobbing, she took in a breath, and rested her forehead against his shoulder.

“Oliver,” she whispered pleadingly, not sure what exactly she was pleading for.

“Congratulations, Sugar Pie,” Foster said, and despite everything Felicity could hear Oliver growl at the sound of that pet name she had hated since Foster had called her by it the first time years ago. “He seems to really love you. Not long anymore, though.”

And with the third shot, Oliver sank onto his knees and finally onto the floor completely. He groaned her name while his hands were moving over his chest in search for the wounds before he lifted his hands that were covered with blood in front of his eyes. Immediately his helpless gaze moved to her face, and again he said her name, this time more in a whisper than a groan.

Felicity felt like paralyzed. This hadn’t been supposed to happen. Foster had wanted to shoot her. The gun must have been pointed at her back which Oliver must have seen and hence had switched their positions, so he had been between the gun and her when Foster had shot. Foster had wanted to kill her. But instead the bullets had hit Oliver because he had shielded her, and kept shielding her even with the first two bullets in his chest already.

“If you don’t want a future with me, Sugar Pie,” Foster said, now aiming the gun at Felicity’s heart, “you don’t get any future.”

The next gunshot echoed through the empty room or maybe only through Felicity’s mind again and again.

Her mind was asking a thousand questions, making her thoughts run wildly, wondering if Oliver and her were now both going to die and her kids would grow up as orphans now and who would raise them when that happened because although they had provisioned for a case like this, it was always different when the day came and those plans would have to be implemented.

Slowly she opened her eyes that she had closed right before the bullet had been fired, and she expected to see her body covered in blood, but that wasn’t the case. Looking up, she saw Foster lying on the floor and Lyla with her gun still in her hand feeling for his pulse. When she turned around to Felicity, she shook her head.

Immediately Felicity kneeled down next to Oliver, taking his one hand to press it down on one of the wounds the gunshots had left on his chest while her own hands came to cover the two others.

“Lyla, call an ambulance!” she yelled, not hearing whatever Lyla answered.

She looked down at Oliver, and tears were springing to her eyes, making it hard to see him clearly. His breathing was erratic and heavy. His gaze was moving around, never focusing on anything until his eyes met her face, and he smiled at her.

“Felicity,” he whispered.

Taking in a sniffling breath, Felicity shook her head. “No, you- You shouldn’t- You shouldn’t talk so much. You- Just hold on, okay? You just hold on. The ambulance will be here and-”

“I made Emmy a promise,” Oliver whispered, sucking in a breath. “I won’t be- I don’t think I can keep it. You- you gotta tell her- you gotta tell her that I- I love her and-“

“Pssst,” Felicity soothed him, tears now running down her cheeks and dropping onto her hands where they mixed with Oliver’s blood. “You will tell her yourself. You’re gonna make it, and you will tell her that you love her yourself.”

“Tell the kids how- how much I love them,” Oliver kept insisting. “They need to know that I- that I didn’t want to- didn’t want to leave them. I- I wanted to- I wanted to-“

“Pssst,” Felicity tried to soothe him once more, shaking her head and sobbing. “You won’t leave them because you will make it because I swear to God if you’re not going to make it, I will personally come to heaven and drag your ass back down here where it belongs.”

Oliver attempted to chuckle, but all he managed was a weak smile. “You think I get to go to heaven.”

“If you fight harder when I say you will get to hell, I will say that.”

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered her name.

He lifted his hands to her face, but Felicity hastily caught his right hand and pressed it back to the wound on his chest. So Oliver used his left hand alone to cup her cheek and pull her closer until her lips were hovering right over his.

“Thank you for everything,” he whispered, gasping for breath while his thumb moved over her lower lips. “I- I love you so much and- and you- you- you gotta-“

“Don’t speak, Oliver. It’s too exhausting for you,” Felicity hastily said when his breathing became quicker and quicker, but Oliver made no attempt to stop talking.

“You gotta- you gotta be the last person I kiss.”

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered with her voice not louder than a breath.

“Please.”

Closing her eyes, Felicity pressed a lingering kiss to Oliver’s lips. She was barely able to keep back the sob when their lips parted. Resting her forehead against his without opening her eyes, she whispered pleadingly, “This is not going to be out last kiss. Promise me.”

But Oliver didn’t answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AUTHOR’S NOTE: Really, I didn’t want to make it that bad. Planned was one single bullet Oliver would take for Felicity. But somehow that got completely out of hand when I imagined him still wanting to save her, despite being shot already. So… that happened.
> 
> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> So much darker again  
> Heartbeat


	113. So much darker again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:   
> Lover   
> Left behind  
> Allies   
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations   
> Desperation   
> A father’s heart   
> The last kiss

Oliver hadn’t regained his consciousness. The entire time they had waited for the ambulance and during the drive to the hospital when they had decided that it was taking too long and they would have to get him to the hospital themselves, Oliver hadn’t regained consciousness. While Laurel and Felicity had taken off the leather jacket and replaced the pants with jeans, Felicity had whispered his name over and over again, trying to get him to open his eyes and tell her that he was just… taking a nap or something, but he hadn’t woken up.

Since Foster and Cupid had come into their home and abducted her and the kids, Felicity had thought about what would happen if she died over and over again. She had pictured Oliver falling back into old habits and living in the darkness while he was grieving. The thought had broken her heart because she didn’t want Oliver to ever fall back into solitude and darkness again. But she knew that even with her being dead Oliver would realize that he still had a family to look out for. And the thought of their children and his sister would help him back into the light. She had pictured all of this in every detail.

She hadn’t thought about what would happen to her if Oliver was going to die.  
She hadn’t really thought about that in a long time.

“Felicity,” Lyla whispered.

Slowly Felicity looked up from the hand her friend had placed on her forearm to call her attention and into her face. Lyla looked worried though a small smile was playing on her lips. Since Laurel couldn’t have come with her in the hospital in her Black Canary gear, Lyla had helped Felicity getting Oliver to the hospital and had stayed with her ever since.

Lyla squeezed Felicity’s forearm gently, saying, “John just called.”

“Is Tommy alright?” she asked immediately, and for an awfully long second Felicity’s heart stood still when she thought that the answer to this question might be no.

Both of her boys needed to be fine. They needed to be fine. They just needed to-

“He’s fine,” Lyla answered hastily, squeezing Felicity’s forearm comfortingly once more. “Caitlin and John both took another careful look at him, and he is fine. No bruises or anything.”

“Good,” Felicity sighed in relief.

She had known that Tommy had been safe because John had messaged it before. Lyla had then called him and told him about what had happened with Foster and Oliver. At least that was what Felicity remembered she had heard. Everything was a little blurry since the moment the first gunshot had resounded.

“They are coming here,” Lyla continued after a while. “And they are bringing the kids with them.”

Felicity looked down onto her blood covered hands. Oliver’s blood had dried on her skin by now. It didn’t make the sight any less frightening.

“They- They can’t come here,” Felicity said. “I can’t-“

“Felicity,” Lyla interrupted her gently, framing her friend’s face with her hands and looking at her intensely. “Your kids need you now, and you need your kids.”

“But-“ Felicity started. Unable to form the words, she looked down at her hands, making Lyla understand without any word why her kids couldn’t be here.

Emmy and Tommy had been through so much in the last hours. The last the needed right now was seeing their mother covered in their father’s blood, crying in fear that she was going to be a widow by the end of the night. The kids were better off without her right now.

“We’ll go and wash the blood from your hands and your face, okay?”

Face? She had Oliver’s blood on her face?!

Putting an arm around her waist, Lyla helped Felicity getting up from the chair in the small waiting room and was about to lead her to the next bathroom when Felicity stopped.

“What if someone needs to find us? What when the surgery-“

“It’s going to take a while longer. Trust me.”

“It won’t take longer if he-“

“We are not thinking about that yet, okay?” Lyla interrupted her with firm voice. “While you and the kids were gone, we told Oliver the same. As long as the worst hasn’t happened, we will not think that it will, okay? It doesn’t help when you are making yourself crazy with thinking like that.”

Felicity nodded weakly, but still her mind kept revolving around what would happen if the worst happened, and Oliver wouldn’t make it out of surgery or die shortly after.  
How was she going to take care of her children and lead the company at the same time?  
How was she going to tell the kids that they were never going to see their father again?  
How was she going to keep living without him?

When Lyla gently pushed her into the bathroom and lead her to the sinks, Felicity’s eyes fell on her image in the mirror, and in response to what she saw her empty stomach cramped so painfully that she threw up yellow bile into the white porcelain sink. Lyla stepped behind her immediately, holding back a few strains of hair that had fallen into Felicity’s face and rubbing her back soothingly.

“Sorry,” Felicity whispered after rinsing her mouth with water.

“No need to apologize,” Lyla assured.

“Can you-“ Felicity started, hastily turning around, so the mirrors were in her back. “Can you clean my face? I- I can’t-“

She gestured to the mirrors behind her without opening her eyes, wordlessly telling Lyla that if she saw herself like that in the mirror once more, she would most likely throw up again.

“Sure,” Lyla replied, wetting some paper towels and starting to clean Felicity’s face with them.

But the image of what she had looked like in the mirror seemed to be burnt into Felicity’s memory because even though her eyes were closed and her back was turned to the mirror, she could still see her reflection in front of her like she was still looking into the mirror.

Her skin was pale, almost white. Dark shadows under her eyes made her look at least ten years older than she was. Her ponytail was messy with several strands fallen into her face – her face that was fully of dried blood. The bloody print of where Oliver’s hand had cupped her cheek when he had kissed her was visible like it had been painted onto her skin purposefully. She looked like a ghost in a bad horror movie.

“Okay, your face is clean,” Lyla said. “Now your hands.”

It took a short moment before Felicity was able to overcome her fear of looking into the mirror again. Lyla was right. Her face was clean, but still Felicity’s memory was making her see where the blood had been, so she lowered her gaze to her hands. But the water cleaning the blood away wasn’t any easier to watch. When her gaze fell onto the ring Foster had placed on her finger, she hastily took it off, letting it disappear in the plug hole. It was like an act of freeing himself, and still she felt her stomach making a terrible flip. So Felicity hastily turned off the water and grabbed some paper towels to clean off the rest of blood with them while forcing herself to take even breaths.

“We should let a doctor see the marks on your throat,” Lyla stated, carefully eying up where Foster’s hands had left their imprint on Felicity’s skin.

“I- I don’t want a doctor,” Felicity said with a sigh, rubbing her hands over her face shortly. “The only reason why I would need a doctor right now is to tell me that Oliver will be okay.”

“Oliver has been through so much. If anyone has the chance to survive something like that, it’s him.” She squeezed Felicity’s shoulders gently, nodding to the door. “Come on, I guess the others will arrive any second.”

But Felicity stayed where she was, leaning against the sinks with her back. When Lyla looked at her, she felt tears streaming down her cheeks. With a sob she said, “He just- he just refused to give in. He kept standing there right in front of me, taking one bullet after the other instead of just- instead of letting Foster just kill me.”

Within a heartbeat Lyla’s arms were wrapped around her shoulders, and she was engulfing her in such a tight hug, Felicity had trouble breathing again. But just like when Oliver had wrapped his arms around her like that back during their short reunion, Felicity didn’t care. She held onto her friend tightly, pressing herself closer to her embrace, needing her comfort.

Oliver had been in life or death situations before, and one should think that Felicity would get used to fearing that her husband might die and would be able to gain home in how he always seemed to make it, but that wasn’t the case. Because every time she feared she was losing Oliver, all she could think of was that maybe this time their luck was running out, and he really was going to die.

And the thought just killed her. Raising her kids without their dad, living without Oliver… The though just killed her.

It took a few minutes until Felicity felt like she couldn’t cry anymore. She pulled back with a sniffle, hastily wiping away the wet paths the tears had taken on her cheeks, and she was about to apologize for crying when she saw the expression on Lyla’s eyes, an expression that most definitely wouldn’t allow her to apologize for crying in her friend’s arms.

So Felicity nodded to her friend, wordlessly telling her that she was ready to go back.

It wasn’t long after they sat back down where they had been sitting and waiting for news about Oliver before when Felicity was startled out of her thoughts about how this night would possibly turn out.

“Mommy!”

As soon as she heard her daughter’s voice calling out for her, Felicity slid off the chair and down on her knees with spread arms. Emmy didn’t waste a second. Immediately she came running into her mother’s arms, wrapping her arms around her neck and pressing herself close to her mother’s body, feeling safe in her arms. The tears Felicity had thought had dried out by now were springing into her eyes once more, and she hastily hid her face against her daughter’s neck, not wanting her to see her mother’s fear.

“You made it to daddy,” Felicity whispered, stroking over her daughter’s hair without loosening herself from the embrace. “I am so proud of you.”

“Daddy said he finds you,” Emmy replied, tightening her hold on her mother. “And Uncle John found Tommy.”

“Yes, he did, sweetheart.”

Emmy didn’t even flinch at the sound of the nickname Foster had misused when he had called her that. It was like all the horror she had been through was already in the past for the little girl now that she was safely back in her mother’s arms and knew that her baby brother was safe, too. Felicity felt her stomach flip at the thought that she would have to tell her little girl that it was now her daddy they had to fear for.

Like everything they had been through in the last two days hadn’t been enough already.

“Emmy, I-“

“Wow! Your daughter’s a runner!” Barry said, gasping for breath dramatically when he came into the waiting area and let himself drop onto the chair next to Felicity with faked exhaustion. “She really is faster than me. We started a race here, and she won. By far.”

Felicity forced herself to smile when Barry winked at Emmeline, and the little girl giggled in response. She then felt Barry’s hand on her shoulder, and when she turned around to him, she saw his worried gaze on her face. Felicity just shrugged her shoulders. She wasn’t sure if he was asking how Oliver was or how she herself was, but either way the answer was the same. She didn’t know.

“Mommy,” Emmy whispered into Felicity’s ear. “Uncle Barry’s the Flash.”

“Sorry, what?” Felicity asked with wide eyes. Although she had understood her daughter perfectly, she was sure that she must have misunderstood her because there was no way she could know that. Hastily she smiled and said, “You mean he dressed up as the Flash during Halloween, don’t you? I mean-“

“No, he’s the real Flash,” Emmy insisted, keeping her voice low, so nobody would hear them.

Felicity shot an unsure gaze to Barry, who pursed his lips before saying, “She knows.”

“What does she know?”

“Everything.”

“Everything?”

“Daddy’s the Arrow. Uncle John is speculoos-“

“You mean Spartan, hon,” Felicity corrected, smiling slightly at the knowledge that John’s codename was the only one she couldn’t name correctly all the time. She kissed her daughter’s cheek, the cheek that wasn’t hurt, and whispered into her ear, “but you can’t tell anybody. You know that, right?”

Emmy nodded proudly, putting a finger to her lips. “It’s a secret.”

“Yes, it is,” Felicity replied, pulling her daughter back into her embrace.

So Emmy knew about all of this. All the time they had tried to protect her from the knowledge, and now she had found out. It was probably just the top of all the craziness of the last hours, and it was only one more thing they had to talk about, but... But right now they needed to talk about something else.

Felicity’s heart skipped a beat.

How was she going to tell her child that she might never see her daddy again? Did she have to tell her or should she just wait and see what happened instead of scaring her to death?

“Where are the others?” Lyla whispered to Barry over Felicity’s head.

“Caitlin, Cisco, Thea and Roy are on their way here. Laurel was called to the place of crime as state attorney, and John is making sure A.R.G.U.S. takes care of what happened to Foster.”

“Is there a cover story already?”

“Foster kidnapped Felicity earlier tonight. Oliver went to save her, but was shot. Luckily two FBI agents who actually work for A.R.G.U.S. were there to get him back and one of them shot Foster before he could kill Felicity. Neither you nor Laurel or any of Starling City’s heroes have been at the crime scene.”

“Simple and close to the truth,” Lyla said with a nod. “I guess it will work.”

“What about the statements of the guys who worked for Foster?” Felicity asked. “Won’t they say that they saw Lyla and Black Canary and Arrow?”

“Foster wanted to destroy your family, so they would say whatever possible to cause harm,” Lyla answered

“Besides, with Laurel as the responsible attorney,” Barry added, “it didn’t really matter what we told anyway and- Hey, look, who’s there?”

Felicity looked up, seeing Thea with tears in her eyes holding onto a pale Roy enter the room, followed by Cisco and Caitlin, who held Tommy in her arms.

“Why’s Aunt Thea crying, momma?” Emmy asked.

“I don’t know. How about you go ask her and try to comfort her?” Felicity suggested, pressing a kiss to her daughter’s cheek before the toddler loosened herself from her mother’s embrace and hurried to go to Thea.

Felicity barely noticed her daughter climbing onto her Aunt’s thighs and asking her what was wrong before assuring her that she could tell her because she was a big girl now and her daddy always said that she was a good listener even if she was a better talker. Instead Felicity concentrated on getting up even though her legs were shaking and reaching out her arms for her baby boy that Caitlin placed in her arms carefully.

“Hi, Tommy,” Felicity whispered, pressing a hundred little kisses all over the boy’s face making him giggle.

Only now she realized how close she really had been to never seeing him again. She hadn’t been able to let those thoughts too close because first Emmy and herself had been in danger, and then she had started fearing for Oliver’s life. She was still was fearing for his life, but with Tommy’s chest pressed to her and his heartbeat perceptible against her ribs, the realization still came.

Cradling the young boy to her safely, Felicity sat back down on the chair between Lyla and Barry and whispered words of comfort to him though Tommy didn’t really look like he needed any comfort. He looked quite content with his head rested on his mother’s shoulder and a strand of her hair in his mouth to chew on.

When Emmy approached her and climbed into her mother’s lap next to her brother, Felicity felt her world stand still. Both of her children were safe, and despite what they had been through, they both seemed to be content or at least not as frightened by what had happened in the last hours as Felicity had imagined they would be. Emmy started playing with her brother’s feet, making him laugh delightedly. The moment was almost perfect. Almost.

“Mommy, where’s daddy?”

Felicity gulped. She still wasn’t sure what exactly she was supposed to tell her not even three years old daughter. Emmy was too smart to just tell her that everything was alright, and on the other hand she was too young to understand the seriousness of what was happening right now.

“Lyla, could you…?” Felicity asked, looking down at Tommy.

When Lyla nodded and reached out her hands to take the young boy, Felicity pressed a kiss to the crown of his head and whispered into his ear that he didn’t have to be scared because she wasn’t going anywhere. She was probably needing those words more than Tommy needed them because unlike her he seemed to not mind too much to be handed to his godmother. Felicity didn’t want to let him go. She had just gotten him back, but she knew that she needed her full attention to tell Emmy where her daddy was, and she couldn’t do that with Tommy in her arms. Carefully Lyla took Tommy and sat him into her lap. The little boy kept holding one strand of Felicity’s hair like he knew exactly that his mommy didn’t want to let him go.

“Mommy?” Emmy asked almost worriedly when Felicity only stroked her hand over her daughter’s curly blonde hair.

Felicity felt the eyes of everyone around on her, and it didn’t exactly help the nervousness she was feeling.

“Emmy, daddy is…” Felicity started, but stopped when she realized that she had no idea how to end the sentence.

What was she supposed to say?  
That the man who had broken into their home, had drugged her and hit Emmy had hurt daddy so much that he might be going to heaven and stay with Uncle Tommy?  
That the world was full of monsters and sometimes they won?

Emmy was a child! A little child should not be going through any of this!

“Mommy, don’t cry,” Emmy said, kneeling on Felicity’s thighs, so she could wipe the tears away from her mother’s face. “I get daddy. Daddy makes it better.”

“Emmy, daddy cannot come here and make this better right now.”

“Daddy can make everything better.”

“You know, sweetheart, daddy got hurt. Very badly.”

“He’s going to be okay, mommy,” Emmy reassured, framing her mother’s face with both of her hands like she knew her daddy always did. “He comes back. He promised me.”

Felicity’s heart skipped a beat. Oliver had talked about a promise he had made to Emmy and he had thought he wouldn’t be able to keep. If he had indeed promised her to come back, Felicity knew there was nothing she could say or do to make it better for their daughter if the promise happened to be broken. Emmy wouldn’t understand that it hadn’t been Oliver’s choice to not come back and-

With a sob, Felicity pulled her daughter against her tightly, not saying anything more about this. She wouldn’t tell her daughter that there was the chance her daddy would break his promise to her for the first time in her life.

Oliver had to make it. He just couldn’t break that promise.

 

 

Eventually tiredness and exhaustion must have won against fear, and Felicity must have dozed off. She woke up, flinching almost violently, her hands already moving out to grasp her kids, but strong hands pulled her back.

“It’s okay,” John whispered into her ear, pulling her into his lap again and holding her close against his chest.

Felicity looked around, finding Thea dozing against Roy’s shoulder. Cisco sat in a corner, working or playing on a tablet.

“Where is everyone?” she asked, her voice sounding hoarse from sleep.

“Lyla, Barry and Laurel took the kids down to get them something to eat, and Caitlin is trying to get a doctor to tell us at least anything.”

“How late is it?” Felicity asked.

How long was Oliver in surgery now? Was it good or bad when it took longer? Had anything happened during-

“You’ve only slept half an hour, and you needed it desperately,” John said.

“Any news yet?”

“No. That is why Caitlin left to find a doctor.”

Sighing, Felicity rested her head back on John’s shoulder, snuggling into his embrace. She didn’t remember when he had come here. What she did remember, though, was that Lyla had received a call from him, telling her that he and Laurel were on their way to the hospital after everything had been taken as much care of as necessary for the moment. She must have fallen asleep before they had arrived.

“I am really glad we got you back in one piece,” John whispered, kissing Felicity’s temple. “Didn’t want to experience losing another sibling.”

“You still might,” Felicity whispered. “Oliver is still-“

“In surgery,” John interrupted her gently. “And that’s a good sign. Oliver’s a fighter. If it was any different, he wouldn’t have made it so long.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, nodding against John’s chest. He was right. Oliver being in surgery for so long was a good thing. It really was. As long as he was in surgery, he wasn’t dead.

Still tired, Felicity allowed her eyes to close once more. She knew she wouldn’t fall asleep again. With the feeling of nausea and the fear in the pit of her stomach only complete exhaustion would make her fall asleep, and that she had passed with the thirty minutes of sleep she had gotten.

“Mommy?!”

Immediately Felicity sat up and slid on the empty chair next to her friend. John let it happen though he put his hand on her back and rubbed up and down comfortingly.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Felicity said with a forced smile though the sight of Emmy having chocolate all around her lips made the smile a little more honest than she had thought it would be. “You look like you got great dinner.”

“No dinner, mommy!” Emmy giggled. “A midnight snack!”

“A midnight snack?” Felicity asked, and Emmy nodded, lifting the rest of her chocolate to make her mother see. “That looks yummy.”

“Do you want to bite?” Emmy offered immediately, holding the chocolate out for her mother.

Felicity shook her head. The thought of eating only increased the nausea. “But thanks for asking.”

Emmy smiled proudly before taking another bite from the chocolate.

“Where did you leave my wife and the others?” John asked after a while.

“Tommy needs a new diaper.”

“And it takes three people for that?” John asked cocking his head.

Emmy giggled, not knowing an answer to the question, then said, “But I brought Grandpa with me.”

Like he had just waited for his announcement Quentin entered the room, followed by Caitlin.

“Did you find a doctor?” Felicity asked her immediately while Emmy was walking over to talk to Roy and offer him some chocolate, too.

“None that could have told me much,” Caitlin answered and hastily added when she saw the disappointment on Felicity’s face, “but a nurse just came from the OR, and she said the surgery should be over any minute. The doctor will come here as soon as possible.”

“So he survived?”

“I don’t have any reason to believe that he didn’t,” Caitlin said with a smile.

Felicity felt a breath she hadn’t known she had been holding leave her lungs. Oliver had survived. That was good. That was more than good actually. That was perfect! If he had made it so far, he would stay alive. She had to believe that.

“Now that the good news have been said,” Quentin said after a while, calling Felicity’s attention on him, “can someone please tell me why the hell I wasn’t called when one of my daughters and my grandchildren went missing?”

“Roy, does grandpa have a loud voice like mommy and granny, too?” Emmy whispered, audible for everyone to hear.

“Look, it just happened tonight and-“

Felicity stopped as soon as she saw Quentin’s face. Obviously the man she had been considering her father for a while now knew exactly that the cover story was a… well, a cover story and not more.

“Oliver was worried that Donna could find out,” John explained.

“Maybe-“

Quentin was interrupted when the others came back to the waiting room. Laurel was carrying a tightly sleeping Tommy in her arms while Lyla was balancing a tablet of paper mugs on her hands, handing everyone one with coffee though coffee might be a little too optimistic, Felicity realized when she took a small sip. It was more like a warm swill with some caffeine.

“I am sorry nobody told you,” Felicity hastily said to Quentin before anything more could be said. “I guess it was just… a decision that was made. But I am really sorry.”

Quentin made a sound, half of a groan and half of a sigh.

“Is there anything I can do at least now?” he asked.

“Can you take the kids home?” Felicity asked with a look to her sleeping baby boy. “I don’t want them to be away from me, but Tommy needs some rest and so does Emmy.”

Quentin nodded. “Sure.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered, watching Quentin taking Tommy from Laurel, before she turned her head to Emmy, who was now giving the rest of her chocolate to Thea, who must have just woken up. “Emmy?”

Immediately the little girl came running to her mom, climbing into her lap and looking at her with tired eyes.

“Grandpa is taking Tommy and you home with him now, okay?”

“No!” Emmy replied immediately, holding onto her mother tightly. “I’ll stay with you.”

“Emmy, you need to go to bed. You haven’t been sleeping in-“

“I slept with Cisco!”

Hastily Cisco switched off the tablet and got up from his chair, approaching them and lifting one finger. “She doesn’t mean… you know, she doesn’t mean that she and I… we didn’t…”

“Cisco, I think Felicity knows what Emmy meant,” Caitlin said with a roll of her eyes.

“I do know,” Felicity assured Cisco and bit her tongue when she saw the relief on Cisco’s face. Felicity looked back at her daughter, tugging a strand of her hair behind her ear. “You know, the doctor might come soon, and I hope that I can see daddy then, so I can’t take care of you.”

“I wanna see daddy, too.”

Felicity shook her head. “I don’t think that’s possible, sweetheart. Daddy will be tired, and very exhausted.”

“I cuddle him,” Emmy suggested.

“You know, he will be too tired to cuddle.”

“Daddy said he can’t be too tired to cuddle.”

Sighing, Felicity kissed Emmy’s forehead. “Emmy, I told you that daddy got hurt, right?”

“Right.”

“And he got so hurt that he can’t cuddle. He will be in a lot of pain and very weak, and-“

“I kiss it better!”

“And sometimes when people are in a lot of pain and very weak, they are… they are not allowed to see many people. Then only one person can visit them.”

“Oh,” Emmy said sadly, lowering her gaze. “So I can’t see daddy?”

“Not tonight, baby,” Felicity whispered. “I hope you will get the chance soon, though. But you gotta be fit then. So you’re going with grandpa?”

Emmy looked up at her mother. “Can I stay here?”

Felicity sighed but nodded. “Okay. You can stay here.”

“Thank you,” the toddler said, snuggling up to her mom as close as possible.

Quentin left with only Tommy, insisting that they should call when there was anything else he could do or when anything about Oliver’s condition changed. He also promised to call Donna and tell her the cover story before the news would make her know.

And basically the moment Quentin stepped out of the waiting room, the doctor came in. Everybody got up on their feet immediately and approached him. They must have made a quite frightening picture because the doctor took a step back.

“Is my husband alright?” Felicity asked immediately, and she felt John’s hand in her back and Laurel’s on her shoulder.

“He’s stabile,” the doctor answered, “at least for now.”

“What does that mean?” Thea asked, gripping Roy’s hand more tightly.

“It was quite close. He lost a lot of blood, and we weren’t sure that he was going to make it.”

“But he did,” Laurel said immediately.

“He did. For now,” the doctor repeated. “We will have to wait and see what happens.”

“When will you know more?” John asked.

“For now we need him to make it through the night.”

“Can I see him?” Felicity asked.

She knew in the back of her mind that she should ask about what exactly had been done in the surgery and what damage the bullets had caused, but now that she knew that he was alive, she just needed to see him. Now.

“Yes, but only one person.”

“Because daddy’s in pain and weak, right?” Emmy asked.

“Right.” The doctor looked at her with a gentle smile before looking at the bruise on her head. “Did someone take a look at that?”

“Aunt Caitlin did.”

“Maybe we should take another look,” the doctor suggested. “We should also take a look at your wounds, Mrs. Queen.”

“I’m fine. I just want to see my husband,” Felicity replied hastily before looking at her daughter. “Emmy, is it okay if Laurel goes with you when the doctor looks at your face?”

“Yes,” Emmy nodded, kissing her mother before reaching out her hands for Laurel and letting herself be lifted into her arms. But she turned back around to Felicity once more before the doctor could lead them away. “Mommy?”

“Yes?”

“Kiss daddy for me, okay?”

“Sure, sweetheart.”

While Laurel and Emmy went with the doctor, Felicity was led to Oliver by a nurse. She hesitated only shortly before she stepped into the room. She closed the door behind her and took in a deep breath before she slowly stepped closer.

Oliver looked helpless and lost which had barely ever been words Felicity had used for him when it hadn’t been right after he had woken from a nightmare. His face was pale, even paler than Felicity’s reflection had been and the shadows under his eyes were not only dark but black. His right arm was in a sling over the mattress, his chest was bandaged and attached to several machines on the side. A small tube under his nose supplied him with more oxygen.

The sight broke Felicity’s heart. She knew he had been through much, but hadn’t it been enough? Did he always have to end up with more scars than before?

Well, better with more scars than dead, a small voice told her.

When Felicity stood right beside him, she reached out her hands to touch him. Her fingers were itching with the need to feel him. The short moment in Foster’s home when he had come to her rescue hadn’t been enough to satisfy that need after being apart from him for so long. It would never be enough.

But with one of her hands hovering over his chest and the other over his hair, Felicity hesitated. She didn’t dare to touch him, afraid what might happen if she did like when she was going to touch him, he might die. It wasn’t logical at all, but Felicity couldn’t help the feeling.

So she kept her hands to herself when she whispered, “Hi.”

It was only one word, one syllable, but it made her tear up and all the fear of the past two days rise back up in her again. Taking in a sniffling breath, Felicity put her hand to Oliver’s head, sure that it was a safe spot to touch without hurting him, and stroked through the short hair. Her other hand came to rest on the hand on his chest, and after kissing the hand, she tangled his fingers with hers.  

She leaned over and pressed her lips to Oliver’s gently.

“This was from Emmy. I had to promise her to give you the kiss from her,” Felicity whispered before leaning in and kissing him once more. “And that was all me.”

She rested her forehead against the side of his head, so her lips were in one line with his ear. She pressed a kiss to the shell of it before she leaned her nose closer to Oliver’s temple and breathed him in, finding comfort in the scent of his skin and hair.

“Tommy is fine. He is with Quentin now and...”

Felicity took in another deep breath, trying to figure out what was the right thing to say. She kept moving her fingers through his hair gently, saying, “I love you, okay? So you gotta keep fighting. You gotta keep fighting to make sure you won’t break your promise to Emmy. She needs you to come back. So does Tommy. And I. I need you to come back, too.”

Felicity opened her eyes, hoping her words had been enough to wake Oliver up. But of course they hadn’t. Oliver’s eyes were still closed, and no sign was hinting to him to wake up. With a quiet sob, Felicity closed her eyes and rested her forehead back against Oliver’s temple.

“Please fight to come back to us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you believe we have almost made it? I am going to post a summary of what happened soon, so everyone who skipped the angst can join in without any lack of information. ;)
> 
> Chapters in this storyline that are yet to come:  
> Heartbeat


	114. Heartbeat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What you should read before:  
> Lover  
> Left behind  
> Allies  
> One step forth, two steps back  
> Realizations  
> Desperation  
> A father’s heart  
> The last kiss  
> So much darker again

Felicity. Since the first night he had been with her or maybe even before that, she had always been his first thought right after waking up. And today was no different.

And the more time passed, the more his senses woke up, and with a content smile he realized that even his senses seemed to only care about her.

He could feel her forehead resting against his temple and her nose pressing against his cheekbone. He could feel her fingers stroking through his short hair gently and her breath ghosting over his skin with every exhale, certainly leaving goose bumps.  
He could smell the sweet scent of her skin and hair, her pure scent without any perfume or shampoo.  
And he could hear her-

Crying?

Immediately Oliver moved, attempting to roll onto his side and cradle her to his body, so he could comfort her, but as soon as he lifted his hand from the bed only slightly, he felt a jolt of pain ripping through his whole body. From the crown of his head down to his toes every cell of his body was screaming in pain. Groaning, Oliver sank back into the mattress.

“Oliver?” he heard Felicity whisper to him, tears and tension audible in her voice. “Oliver?”

He tried to open his eyes to see her, but just like the rest of his body his lids refused to do as he wanted. He also tried to answer, but again the pain made it impossible. All it allowed him to do was to groan once more. It seemed to be enough for Felicity, though, because he felt her forehead pressing back against his temple and her hand squeezing the one of his that was resting on his chest.

“I’m so glad you woke up,” she whispered with a quiet sob. “I was so scared. For a while I really thought you weren’t going to make it.”

“Sorry,” Oliver pressed out between clenched teeth.

“You don’t have to apologize because you are okay. You are okay, and that is all that matters for the moment. I know you are in pain, so you’re probably not okay-okay, but you’re alive, and you’re going to be better once you had more time to heal,” Felicity babbled. “You just need a lot of rest which I know you don’t like, but it will be okay or not okay and rather really good because I will do whatever I can to make it more like a vacation than anything. I will be your private nurse. I could even get such a really short outfit and…”

Oliver stopped listening. As much as he usually enjoyed when Felicity babbled about everything and anything, he couldn’t hear it right now. It was increasing his throbbing headache and didn’t help him figure out what had happened. Because although he had realized by now that he was lying in the hospital, he still didn’t really know why.

He remembered flirting with Felicity over the comms. He remembered planning hot, passionate sex with her all night long. But he was sure that it hadn’t come to that because although sex with Felicity did end with some bruises sometimes, those were never that bad that they made it necessary to go to the hospital, never mind led them close to death like Felicity’s reaction had indicated he had been.

Something else must have-

A series of images flashed through his mind, none of them lasting longer than the split of a second. But they didn’t need to because the five seconds it took for the series to end were enough for Oliver to remember everything that had happened. He remembered every single thing that had happened from the moment since he had stepped onto the broken glass on the floor of his home to the second he had lost consciousness during what he had feared would be his last kiss with Felicity.

“Fe- Felic-“ Oliver’s voice broke, and he had to take a deep breath that made his whole chest hurt to force the next words out between his clenched teeth. “The kids.”

But his voice was too small to be heard during Felicity’s babble.

He knew why she was babbling. He knew that it was often Felicity’s first reaction when she felt overwhelmed. When she felt overwhelmed – whether with fear or lust or love or relief or whatever – her first instinct was always to babble. The last hours must have been filled with fear for her, and now that this fear seemed to have dropped from her shoulders, she was doing it again. She was babbling. He knew that, and he understood and accepted that – normally. Not right now, though. Not when he wasn’t sure that both of their kids were alright.

So Oliver forced his eyes to open, letting the sight of Felicity’s beautiful though tear-stained face comfort him only shortly before he grabbed her wrist tightly to make her look at him. He took in another deep breath.

“Felicity. Where. Are. The. Kids?”

He accentuated every word, partly to make sure that she understood the urgency of his words and partly because each word hurt so much that he had to press it out between clenched teeth.

Felicity leaned over him, so her face was right above his. She put her hand, the one he wasn’t holding too tightly onto her wrist, to his cheek, cupping it with all gentleness when she said firmly, “The kids are fine. Both our kids are fine and safe.”

Oliver eyed her up closely, making sure that she wasn’t saying it to make him feel better. Only when he was completely sure that it wasn’t the case and her words were honest, he rested his head back on the pillow and took a deep breath.

The kids were okay. Felicity was okay. That was all that mattered. His wounds would heal, and his body would recover. As long as his family was safe and fine, he was okay because his family was all that really mattered to him.

“Oliver.”

At the whisper of his name Oliver opened his eyes. He followed Felicity’s gaze to her wrist that he was still holding way too tightly. He held it so tightly, it must hurt her. So hastily he let go, mumbling a sorry before he dropped his hand to the mattress.

“It’s okay,” Felicity assured him, tangling her fingers with his and stroking her free hand over the side of his face. “I’m just glad you’re alright.”

“Glad you’re alright,” Oliver answered with a sigh and snuggled his cheek into the palm of Felicity’s hand, closing his eyes.

He felt the pain slowly decreasing and the knowledge that his whole family was finally safe again comfort him deep inside his heart. He pressed his nose to Felicity’s wrists, breathing in the scent of her skin and smiled. Felicity was here with him. That was good. Really good. He needed her here, needed to feel her pulse against his lips and her fingers in his hair and-

When he opened his eyes, Felicity was looking at him with such love in her beautiful eyes that it made his skin prickling comfortably. He loved that after all those years they were together now she was still looking at him like that. Before her nobody had ever looked at him like that.

“You knew that Foster and Cupid knew each other,” Oliver suddenly whispered, remembering Lyla’s words about how Felicity had known clearly. “You knew, and you didn’t tell me.”

Felicity lowered her gaze to their joint hands. Oliver didn’t miss how her rings were missing, and he shot a short glance to his own left hand, seeing his wedding band where it belonged. She must have put it back there after the surgery because they always took those away for surgery, right?

“I didn’t tell you,” Felicity just whispered in response.

“Because you were scared what I would do if I knew?” Oliver asked, feeling the more she spoke, the easier it got.

Immediately Felicity lifted her gaze to his face with wide eyes. Her fingers squeezed his firmly as she was shaking his head.

“That was not the reason,” she assured him. “It was just… It was right before the holidays, and I didn’t want to ruin those for you. If I had known that they would try to do something so shortly after… I would have told you. I really would have, but I thought we deserved happy holidays for once, and then I just forgot because it didn’t seem to matter and-“

Felicity took a deep, slightly sniffling breath. She lowered her gaze back to their joint hands and whispered, so it barely audible for Oliver though he was lying right next to her, “I should have let you kill him.”

Oliver didn’t even hesitate for a second, answering, “No. You did the right thing.”

“He almost killed you, Oliver. And Lyla had to killed him nonetheless, so if I hadn’t asked you not to kill him-“

When her words ended in a sob, Oliver put his hand behind her head despite the pain it caused him, he pulled her in until her head rested at his shoulder, and she was crying against the side of his neck.

“I’m fine,” he reassured her quietly. “We are fine. Everything is going to be fine. Or are the kids-?”

“They’re fine,” Felicity sobbed against his shoulder immediately. “They really are. Emmy’s outside. I- I guess I should tell her that you- that you woke up. Just… Just give me a minute.”

“We have all the time in the world,” Oliver mumbled, resting his lips against the crown of her head and kissing her hair gently. “Take your time.”

He didn’t want to let go of Felicity, not after having her back only so shortly. He didn’t want her to leave his side, but he was an adult. And their kids had been through so much they needed their mother right now. So he would have to withhold his need of needing his wife with him to give their kids what they needed.

Still Felicity stayed at his side and just cried for several minutes. All Oliver did was stroking his hand over her hair, breathing in the scent of her skin and pressing kisses to the crown of her head. At one point he felt tears springing into his eyes, too, when he thought about how close he had been to losing his family, whether because of their or because of his own death, but he forced himself to swallow down the tears and just take deep even though painful breaths. Right now all he wanted to do was comforting Felicity, and her presence was enough to comfort him and get him to hold back his own tears.

Felicity was here with him. The kids were alright. Everything was going to be okay.

Oliver repeated those words over and over again in his mind until he felt the meaning settling in deep in his heart.

Felicity _was_ here with him. The kids _were_ alright. Everything _was_ going to be okay, more than okay hopefully. Everything was going to be as wonderful as it had been before Cupid and Foster had turned their lives upside down.

Taking in a sniffling breath, Felicity finally lifted her head from Oliver’s shoulder and wiped away the wetness the tears had left on her cheeks. His heart clenched uncomfortably. He really didn’t want to let Felicity go. He had longed for her presence at his side for far too long. If it wasn’t for their kids, he wouldn’t let her go. But he loved his kids too much to withhold their mother from them when they needed her as much as he did.

“Give- give the kids kisses from me and tell them-“

“Whatever you think I should tell them,” Felicity interrupted him, kissing his cheek, you can tell them yourself when they are here.”

“You’re- you’re bringing them here?” Oliver asked, suddenly feeling his heart racing when Felicity nodded.

All the time he had been forced to spend without them he had longed for having one moment, just one moment with Felicity and both of their kids at his side. It had been all he had dared to beg for with all of them being out of his reach and in danger. But now that the moment was so close, he wasn’t sure if he really deserved it. Not after what he had done.

“Wait,” he stopped Felicity when she was already on the door with the handle in her hand.

Felicity turned around, looking at him with a questioning gaze. Only when she realized Oliver’s hesitation did she come back to his side and tangled her fingers with his once more, looking at him worriedly.

“What’s wrong?” she asked in a whisper.

“I- I need to tell you something else first, and it- it might-“

Oliver stopped when the wild beating of his heart made it hard for him to talk. He shortly followed Felicity’s gaze to the monitor that showed how quickly his heart was really beating, but he squeezed her fingers to make her look at him again, and she did.

“What I did might change your mind on whether I should see Emmy or Tommy again.”

Again tears were springing into his eyes, and this time he couldn’t stop them from streaming down his cheeks. But Felicity’s fingers were there immediately, wiping them away when she leaned closer and pressed her lips to the corner of his mouth.

“I know what happened,” Felicity whispered against his lips, knowing exactly what was bothering him. “And it’s okay. It doesn’t change the way I see you in general, and it certainly doesn’t change how I see you as a father or a husband. You are an amazing dad, and our kids need to see you.”

“Tommy’s here, too?” he asked, swallowing down the rest of his tears.

Felicity smiled gently. “Quentin left when you got out of surgery, but since you’ve been sleeping through almost the whole day, he is back here now. With Tommy of course. So I guess now might be the perfect time for a full family reunion, isn’t it?”

Oliver tugged at her hand to make her come a little closer until her nose was bumping against his before he said with new tears in his eyes, “Thank you for forgiving me.”

“There is nothing to forgive you,” Felicity promised. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Felicity leaned forward, brushing her lips against Oliver’s twice before she kissed him more firmly, healing things inside both of them that they hadn’t even known needed healing until then. If it was completely up to them, they might have never broken the kiss, but they both knew in the back of their minds that their kids were only waiting for them to get them and see their daddy again. So Felicity broke the kiss with a sigh and left Oliver’s side to go outside, not before winking at him from the door of course.

Oliver rested his head back into the pillow, closing his eyes with a sigh. The pain he was feeling in all his body really was a small price to pay for having his family back here. His heart was beating a little faster at the thought of having Felicity and both of the kids in his arms in a few minutes.

The thought had just formed in his thoughts when the door was ripped open Emmy came running right towards the bed.

“No, no, no,” Felicity, who came jogging in behind their daughter, stopped the toddler hastily when she was trying to climb onto the bed. She wrapped her arms around her daughter’s stomach from behind and gestured to Oliver’s chest. “See? Daddy’s hurting. You can’t climb on top of him.”

Emmy’s eyes darkened slightly, and she stroked a gentle hand over the bandages that were wrapped around Oliver’s chest when she asked, “You’re hurt, daddy?”

“Just a little,” Oliver answered with a wink.

“More than a little,” Felicity corrected. “We gotta be really gentle with him.”

“But no cuddle?” Emmy asked.

Oliver snorted. “Would daddy let a little bit of pain stop him from cuddle time?”

“No!”

Before Felicity could have said something, the little girl was already moving out of her mother’s embrace and climbing on the bed where she snuggled herself so close to her dad that Felicity almost expected Oliver to scream in pain, but all he did was screwing up his face a little and pressing his lips together. And despite that he pressed the toddler closer with the arm that wasn’t in the sling.

Oliver breathed in the scent of the toddler’s hair and closed his eyes, enjoying how close she was to him. God, how he had missed cuddle times like these! Since Emmy’s birth he was so spoilt with cuddle times. He had been kind of spoilt before when it had been only Felicity and him, but with the kids it had taken the cuddle times to a whole new level.

Which reminded him of-

“Where is Tommy?” Oliver asked Felicity, leaning his cheek against the crown of Emmy’s head. “Can I see him, too?”

“Already here,” Quentin said, stepping into the room with Tommy in his arms. “Someone here needed a new diaper.”

Tommy giggled like he had understood his grandpa’s words exactly, and then reached out his arms for Oliver.

“Emmy, can you take off the sling on my arm?” Oliver asked lowly, hoping Felicity wouldn’t hear, but considering the expression in her eyes she had probably heard nonetheless.

Before Felicity could say anything, though, Emmy shook her head and said, “No, you’re hurt. You need the sling.”

“It’s not that bad,” Oliver lied.

Emmy was taking none of it, though. She eyed him up with a strict gaze that reminded of Felicity and told him, “Mommy said you need it. You can’t take it off.”

“And how am I supposed to cuddle with Tommy and you at the same time when I have only one arm?”

Emmy didn’t hesitate long. She moved out of her father’s arm and just snuggled to his side, resting her head on the shoulder that wasn’t hurt. “I can lie here. You need to hold Tommy. He cannot fall off the bed. But the sling stays.”

Oliver didn’t know if he would ever get used to how caring Emmy was. She had proven it several times before, but in some way it still surprised him every time.

“Emmy?”

“Yes, daddy?”

“You know, my lips hurt a little. You think you can kiss that better?”

Eagerly the little girl got up on her knees and leaned over her father’s face, so she could press her lips to his in a gentle kiss. She lingered there for a moment before she pulled back and asked, “Better?”

“So much better,” Oliver replied with a nod and watched smilingly how his daughter snuggled back to his side. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head before he turned his head to Felicity, who was now holding Tommy, and said, “Okay, now my little buddy please.”

So she placed the young boy in his arm. Tommy propped his upper body up on his forearms on Oliver’s chest, blind for his father’s pain, and started playing with the bandages immediately. But Oliver really didn’t care. He didn’t care that it hurt because his children were back in his arms now, and that was all that mattered. The pain really felt like nothing compared to the joy of having them here.

They were all here. Felicity was here. Emmy was here. Tommy was here. His world was whole again.

“Mommy, you come cuddle, too!” Emmy suggested. “And grandpa, you too!”

Felicity chuckled. “Look, there is no place on the bed for us to join.”

“We make place, right, daddy?” Emmy asked, already sitting up to try and figure out how there could be more place on the bed.

“You know, I should leave you alone anyway,” Quentin said. “I’ll wait outside to take the kids back home later.”

“I’ll stay here!” Emmy announced immediately. “Daddy’s hurting. I need to take care of him.”

“Thank you, Quentin,” Oliver said, “for taking care of the kids.”

Quentin nodded with a sigh. “You know, if you didn’t look like crap,” – “Grandpa said crap!” – I’d actually beat the hell out of you for keeping this whole situation a secret from me instead of telling me.”

Emmy giggled. “You can’t beat daddy. He’s the Arrow.”

“Pssst,” Oliver made hastily. “Secret, remember?”

“But it’s grandpa, daddy!”

“Yeah, but we are not talking about this to anybody, okay?”

Emmy nodded, zipping her lips with her fingers. “A secret. Okay.”

“Good,” Oliver whispered back, rubbing Tommy’s back when the little boy rested his head right under his father’s chest and closed his eyes. Then he looked back at Quentin. “I’m really sorry.”

Quentin nodded with a sigh, and he was already halfway at the door when he turned back around with a quiet laughter and said, “Now I would have almost forgotten-“ He reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a small plastic bag with two rings, “this.”

“Oh my God,” Felicity whispered. “Where did you-?”

“CSI wanted to take it when they found it in the house Foster has been holding you captive in. I thought those would be better placed back where they belonged, so…“

When Quentin was about to hand Felicity the rings, Oliver whispered to Emmy, “Get me that bag. Now!”

Immediately Emmy moved. She rolled herself off the bed and ran to her grandpa, stealing the bag from between his fingers and running back to her daddy, so she could give it to him.

“Okay, my job here is done,” Quentin said. “If you need me, I’ll wait outside.”

“Thank you,” Oliver, Felicity and Emmy all said in chorus while Tommy only made a quiet sound, being half asleep already.

When the door closed behind Quentin, Felicity looked at Oliver. “Do I get my rings back now or what?”

“Maybe we wait a few weeks, and you get it back when we get married during our anniversary once more.”

“Daddy, mommy and you already are married,” Emmy said with a giggle.

“She’s right,” Felicity confirmed with a nod, slowly approaching the bed. “We got married twice already.”

“What stops us from doing it a third time?”

“Sanity?”

Oliver chuckled, screwing up his face when the movement made his chest hurt. Hastily Felicity approached the bed and put a hand to his shoulder.

“You should rest now. We can-“

“Give me your hand,” Oliver requested calmly.

“You really should-“

“Felicity. Give me your hand.”

Hesitatingly Felicity held out her hand, and Oliver took it, slowly placing both of the rings back on her finger. They looked each other in the eyes while he did so and even though no words were spoken, they both knew that they were still making a promise with this – the promise to never stop fighting to be with each other like they had fought in the last days.

When the rings were placed back where they belonged, giving Felicity the feeling of really being home and safe, she gripped Oliver’s fingers tightly. She took in a deep breath, trying to force back the tears that had sprung to her eyes, but they fell none the less when all the shock and horror of the last days finally fell off of her completely.

“Sorry,” Felicity sobbed, putting her free hand on her face to hide it from Oliver. “Sorry, I-“

“Hey,” Oliver whispered.

Felicity took in a sniffling breath before she lowered her hand from her face and dared to look at Oliver. His eyes were full of understanding and love.

“You don’t ever have to apologize to me for letting your feelings show,” he said firmly and waited until she nodded before he tugged at her hand. “And now come here and lie down.”

“You’re hurt.”

“I don’t care,” Oliver said, looking down to Tommy and Emmy who were both deeply asleep. “I want all of you guys here snuggled up to me. So come here now.”

Felicity hesitated shortly, but eventually she slipped out of her shoes and climbed onto the bed, snuggling to Oliver’s other side. She rested her head on the edge of the pillow with her lips against his hurt shoulder.

“You can come even closer,” Oliver whispered, pressing his lips to Felicity’s forehead.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.”

“We both know that is a lie, and I’m fine here,” Felicity replied before Oliver could say anything more and tangled her fingers with him on Tommy’s back. “We should get some rest.”

“Yes, we should,” Oliver said with a sigh. “Sleep tight.”

“Sleep tight,” Felicity responded. Her eyes were already closed when a thought popped up in her mind, and she propped herself up onto her forearm to look at him, finding that his eyes were already closed. “Oliver?”

He opened his eyes and looked at her. “Felicity?”

She smiled, but it only lasted shortly before she took a deep breath and said, “Thank you. For what you did when Foster-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her, his voice sounding weaker again now that he felt the exhaustion increasing. “You never ever have to thank me, especially not for this. I would do it again anytime. In a heartbeat. And I would have taken a lot more bullets for you if my body hadn’t given out.”

Felicity wasn’t sure what exactly she was supposed to say to this, so she just gave Oliver a smile, kissed the underside of his jaw and rested her head back where it had been next to his shoulder. Sighing, she closed her eyes.

“Can we live in this moment forever?” Oliver mumbled after a while, already half asleep.

“Yes, please,” Felicity replied with a sigh right before falling asleep herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking through this with me and trusting me with the angst. I hope you enjoyed this bumpy ride. ;)


	115. Back in its place

“I’m home!”

Immediately Emmy let the pillows from the couch she had wanted to carry upstairs fall to the floor carelessly, and with spread arms she ran to the front door from where she knew the voice had come, almost knocking down Laurel. “Daddy!”

“Emmy, careful! Careful, careful, careful!” Felicity hurried to say when she followed her daughter to the door, but the toddler had already thrown herself at her dad, and if it hadn’t been for Oliver’s quick reflexes, she would have crushed against his hurt arm that was still in a sling. But since his reflexes hadn’t suffered too much from his injury, the little girl was now sitting safely on her father’s hip on the not so badly hurt side with her arms wrapped around his neck and her head snuggled to his shoulder.

“That’s the kind of welcome I had hoped for,” Oliver said with a smile but through gritted teeth, revealing that he was in pain, and kissed the top of Emmy’s head. “Hey, sweetie, does daddy get a kiss?”

Quickly Emmy leaned back, put her hands to her daddy’s face and kissed him gently. Felicity watched from a little distance, feeling her heart warming at the sight of Oliver being back home and holding their daughter in his arm. And at the same time she felt unbelievably worried because she could see the pained expression in Oliver’s face when Emmy moved around in his arm to try and fill him in on everything he had missed in the time he had spent in the hospital.

“Come here, sweetie,” Felicity said, approaching Oliver and taking Emmy from his arms to whisper into her ear, “We talked about being very, very careful with daddy, right?”

“But he’s the Arrow, so he is super strong!”

“Yes, but he is hurt, and so we need to be very, very gentle. Remember? I told you that just because he is the Arrow, it doesn’t mean that nobody can hurt him or he can’t get wounded. Right?”

“Right,” Emmy replied, lowering her face in shame before she looked at her dad with sad eyes. “Sorry, daddy.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Oliver replied and kissed his daughter’s temple before he leaned his lips against Felicity’s ear and whispered, “I’m fine.”

Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s unharmed shoulder, breathing him in for a short moment. She had visited him every day while he had been in the hospital which should have been enough to make her know that he was alive and fine, but having him standing in their home again was just different.

“Mommy, are we going to show daddy the surprise now?” Emmy asked.

“I think that has been my hint to leave,” Laurel said, gesturing towards the front door from where she stood in the door to the living room.

“Emmy, can you take the pillows you were going to bring upstairs before into mommy’s and daddy’s bedroom right now? We’ll follow you in about a minute. We just need to talk to Aunt Laurel for a moment.”

“Okay,” Emmy said. “And I am going to be extra quiet, so Tommy won’t wake up.”

“Good girl,” Felicity replied, kissing her daughter’s cheek before she let her down on the floor.

Emmy ran to Laurel, hugging her legs tightly and saying, “Bye, Pretty Bird.”

“Bye, Emmy,” Laurel replied, stroking her hand over the little girl’s head before the toddler ran to where she had let the pillows fall and headed upstairs to her parents’ bedroom. She was smiling excitedly, probably because she couldn’t wait for her father to see what she had worked on with the Diggle, Laurel and her mother in the last hours to make her daddy’s first time back home better.

Felicity waited until she heard the door being closed behind Emmeline upstairs before she turned around to Laurel and stepped right in front of her. Hugging her friend, Felicity said, “Thank you so much for everything, Laurel.”

“No need to thank me,” Laurel replied. “I was glad I could help, and I was on my way back home from work anyway, so why not picking my friend up from the hospital and taking him home?”

“You did a lot more than just that,” Felicity replied, loosening herself from the hug and looking at Laurel.

But her friend just shrugged her shoulders. “That’s what friends are for, isn’t it?”

Squeezing Felicity’s hands comfortingly, Laurel winked at her and then turned around to Oliver, hugging him carefully, so she didn’t hurt him.

“Thank you, Laurel,” Oliver said.

“Like I said to your lovely wife already, there is no reason to thank me,” she insisted. “Get well soon. If any of you needs anything, just call me. No matter the time.”

“Thank you,” Oliver and Felicity said in chorus, and with a chuckle Laurel turned around and left.

When the door fell closed behind her, Oliver reached out his unharmed arm and pulled Felicity back against him, holding her close, and she wrapped her arms around his middle, leaned her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes. She moved her hands over his muscular back, snuggling herself as close to him as possible without hurting him.

What Cupid and Foster had done, had left a mark on all of them. Felicity had noticed it in how Tommy was even clingier than he had been before, and how Emmeline woke up from nightmares every night and only calmed down after she had been crying on her mother’s shoulders for hours. And Felicity had also noticed in how she didn’t feel as safe in her home as she had felt before.

They were lucky to have such good friends – friends who had been almost as marked by what had happened to them as the Queen Family themselves. They had known that it wouldn’t be easy for Felicity and the kids to be alone or for Oliver to be in the hospital, it had almost seemed like they had been working in shifts, making sure neither Oliver nor Felicity and the kids had been alone when they couldn’t be with each other. Which had also been why Laurel had actually lived here in the last days, making sure everyone was feeling safer at night.

“Everything is back in its place,” Oliver said after a while, not loosening his grip on Felicity.

“Yes, everyone was here to help with that,” Felicity replied, knowing that he referred to the mess Cupid and Foster had left. When images of what she had found here when she had first come back after the abduction and after waiting for Oliver to wake up in the hospital, she only snuggled closer to Oliver, needing the comfort, his broad and warm body spent.

She felt his lips on top of her head, making her feel like he knew exactly what was going on with her, and with a content smile on her lips she sighed and rested her chin against his shoulder to look at him. She felt her heart skip a beat when he smiled back at her with just as much contentment in his eyes as there was in hers.

“I’m glad you’re home,” she whispered.

“I’m glad I’m home, too,” Oliver replied.

Their lips met in a gentle kiss. Felicity sighed into it, opening her lips to Oliver, and their tongues met in a long memorized dance that knew no fight dominance. Their lips lingered close to the others even when they were parted.

“How are you doing?” Oliver asked with whispered voice, nuzzling her nose with his.

“I missed you,” Felicity replied honestly.

“I missed you, too,” Oliver replied. “All of you.”

He leaned back down to kiss her once more, even more slowly and more gently than before. Because it was what they both needed right now. Ever since they had told each other everything that had happened from the moment they had hung up the phone in the night of the abduction up until the moment Oliver had woken up in the hospital, their need to erase all the terrible memories from their minds had only increased their need for closeness and gentleness.

Neither Felicity nor Oliver had taken kindly to the fact that they had both been forced to kiss somebody else because they had been supposed to only kiss each other for the rest of their lives. But evil had gotten in their way of that. After they had told each other about the kisses they had been forced into, they had spent a whole afternoon in the hospital bed, only holding each other and kissing. It hadn’t exactly erased the kisses with the wrong people from their minds, but it had at least helped to urge those memories in the background.

The kisses they shared with each other were the only kisses that mattered.   
And they both knew that.

“Mommy!” Emmy’s loud voice was to be heard from upstairs.

Without leaning back from where her forehead still rested against Oliver’s, Felicity shouted, “Yes, sweetie?”

“Tommy woke up! And when’s daddy coming to see the surprise?”

“We’re already on our way. Can you make sure Tommy lies still and doesn’t hurt himself until we get back?”

“Okay.”

Oliver shot a doubting look to the stairs. “I’m actually kind of tired. Can’t we just spend the day down here?”

“Nope,” Felicity replied with a shake of her head. “Everything’s prepared for you to be back home upstairs.”

She took Oliver’s hand of the unharmed arm and put it over her shoulders while wrapping her free arm around his middle and holding him close. Part of Oliver’s weight was resting on her body. She could see the struggle in his eyes. He wanted to straighten up and not put his weight on her, but she also knew that his body wasn’t strong enough to do so. Even though he had only been standing in the last minutes and not be out on the field, it had tired him out after all the lying in the hospital bed.

The doctor had told them that he still needed rest, but they should work on building up his condition again from now on. In a few weeks he would hopefully be the old Oliver, only with some physical and emotional scars more. The thought made her heart ache for Oliver, but she smiled at him bravely. But Oliver pressed a kiss to her temple, seeing right through her smile.

While they slowly started walking to the stairs, he whispered into her ear, “Thank you.”

“Hey, you took a few bullets for me. I think I can help you get upstairs into bed,” Felicity replied.

“Do you think I can use the taking three bullets for you in case we will ever fight?” Oliver asked. “You know, like… I want to watch a baseball game, and you want to watch something else, and I say ‘Well, I took three bullets for you, so you should at least let me choose what we watch on TV’?”

“You could do that,” Felicity replied, taking the first step, “but that would mean there is no fight and hence no make-up sex.”

“Yeah, I guess it’s not worth it then,” Oliver responded without hesitation, and Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder with a chuckle.

“I knew you would never give up on make-up sex.”

“Maybe we should fight right now to give us a chance for make-up sex soon.”

“I think that has to wait a little longer until your condition is- hey, are you okay?” Felicity asked worriedly when Oliver rested more and more weight on her shoulders.

“I just… I need a little break,” Oliver said breathlessly, taking his hand from her shoulder and holding onto the handrail. He looked down and shook his head in disbelief when he realized that they had only taken half of the stairs. “Just… just give me a minute.”

Worriedly Felicity framed Oliver’s face with her hands and looked at him. His skin was pale, and he looked exhausted. A thin film of sweat had formed on his forehead.

“Maybe we should take you back to the hospital and-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her immediately, shaking his head vehemently. “I- I’ve just been lying in bed so long, I just- I just need a short moment.”

“Okay,” Felicity replied, keeping her hands on his cheeks.

And she gave him the time he needed before he nodded his head to signal her that he was ready to continue the rest of the way. Felicity stroked her hand over his chest where his heart was and kept watching his face carefully to make sure she knew when he needed another rest, but Oliver managed to take the rest of the stairs without pausing once more.

“I hope whatever you have been doing there to surprise me was worth the climb.”

A cold shiver ran down Felicity’s spine at the words ‘the climb’ because up until now they had only been used to describe the climb up the mountain when Oliver had left to fight Ra’s al Ghul, no memory Felicity wanted to be reminded of too often.

“Do you really have any doubts?” Felicity asked, ignoring the memories of thinking that Oliver had died back then just like she had feared that he was going to die not that long ago after Foster had shot him.

“Since I already know it’s not you naked in bed waiting there, I do,” Oliver replied, kissing her temple once more.

Felicity chuckled. “Don’t worry. I swear it will be worth it.”

Quietly they walked through the hallway until they stood in front of the door to their bedroom. They could hear their daughter’s muffled voice on the other side of the door, singing to her little brother with low voice. They stayed outside for a short moment and just smiled while they were listening to Emmy trying to sing her brother back to sleep. When Felicity and Oliver exchanged a gaze, they smiled at each other before they nodded in agreement, and Felicity opened the door.

“Surprise!” Emmy exclaimed happily, and Tommy added a delighted giggle.

“Wow!” Oliver made, looking at his surprise. “Did the three of you do that all by yourself?”

“Uncle John and Aunt Lyla and Sara and Aunt Laurel helped,” Emmy answered with a big grin on her lips. “Tommy not so much. But he’s cute, so it’s okay.”

“Sounds like your father’s life motto,” Felicity teased.

Oliver chuckled in response while he was taking in the beautiful surprise his family had prepared there for him. A part of the room including the window had been walled off with blankets. The floor was covered with mattresses. A sea of pillows cushioned the walls and the floor, making it look like they could just let themselves fall down without getting hurt. Chains of lights were making sure that it wasn’t too dark in the small blanket fort.

“Do you like it, daddy?” Emmy asked from where she was kneeling on the floor next to Tommy.

“I love it,” Oliver replied, squeezing Felicity’s in wordless gratitude.

Felicity closed the door behind them, and together they stepped farther into the blanket fort. With Felicity’s help Oliver first got down on his knees and then leaned back against some pillows at the wall, feeling how sore his body still was. Carefully he reached out his unharmed arm and pulled Tommy in his lap, kissing the boy’s cheek. Tommy released a sound of delight and turned around on his father’s thighs, so he could completely snuggle up to his dad. He kept his eyes on his sister while his fingers were playing lazily with the neckline of his dad’s shirt.

“Normally forts are smaller,” Emmeline explained Oliver, crawling closer and sitting down next to him. “But mommy said you need room. Because you’re hurt. Does it still hurt, daddy?”

“A little,” Oliver replied.

Felicity watched Emmy putting her hand to Oliver’s cheek and say as seriously as possible for a little girl in her age, “You can say when it hurts, daddy. I’ll make it better.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned down and pressed a kiss to Emmy’s cheek. “Thanks, but it’s not that bad at the moment. I am just a little tired and very glad to be home with all of you.”

“I’m happy because you’re home, too,” Emmy replied, while Tommy made munching noises to say that he wanted to be kissed, too. So Oliver leaned down once more and pressed a kiss to the little boy’s lips, making him giggle in amusement. Emmy smiled. “Tommy’s happy, too.”

“Well, so there’s only missing-“

“Mommy!” Emmy exclaimed, looking at Felicity and reaching out her little hands for her. “Mommy, are you happy, too?”

“Very happy,” Felicity replied and crouched down next to her daughter before lying down in the cushions and pulling Emmeline close, so the girl’s back was pressed to her chest. “This is kind of perfect.”

“It is perfect!” Emmy objected. “We have a TV here. And a mini fridge.”

“A mini fridge?” Oliver asked, and immediately Emmy pointed at one of the back corners of the fort where a mini fridge was indeed placed.

“Do you need an ice pack, daddy?” Emmy asked and didn’t even wait for Oliver’s answer before she already wiggled out of her mother’s arm and hurried to the little fridge to get him one.

Oliver slowly turned on his side, careful not to hurt himself or Tommy by doing so. While Tommy snuggled his head under his father’s chin, Oliver looked at Felicity lovingly.

“What?” she asked with a smile, feeling her heart skip a beat at the love in his eyes.

“Thank you for this,” he whispered. “It’s making being home even better.”

“Well, we thought the same way,” Felicity replied. “We thought we could all use some good cuddle time.”

“Cuddle time!” Emmy exclaimed, coming jumping back between her parents.

Once again she snuggled herself close to Felicity with her back pressed to her mother’s chest. While gently pressing the ice pack to her father’s shoulder, she took Tommy’s hand from the arm sling and explained, “No, no, Tommy. You’re gonna hurt daddy.”

Oliver smiled at Felicity over their kids’ heads, and she smiled back.

“You know, I was wrong before,” Oliver whispered while Emmy kept talking to Tommy. Felicity perked her eyebrows in question, and Oliver pressed a kiss to first Tommy’s, then Emmy’s hair while simultaneously putting his hand to Felicity’s cheek and stroking her soft skin gently before he added, “I said everything was back in its right place, but… that’s only really true now that we are all home, and the three of you are back in my arms.”


	116. Happy birthday

“Daddy! Mommy! Tommy! Mommy! Tommy! Daddy!” Emmy exclaimed and started jumping up and down on the mattress between her parents, waking both of them efficiently.

Felicity wanted to groan because she just knew in her bones that it was still early.

Since Oliver had come home from the hospital, they had once again established a family bed and sleeping in one bed with both of the kids really wasn’t as easy or as comfortable as nice photos in magazines or sequences in movies wanted to make them believe. Emmy had trouble falling asleep and told them stories until late in the night, and Tommy slept so restlessly that he hit or kicked Felicity in his sleep at least three times a night, waking her each and every time.

When neither of her parents answered, both of them just lying still and pretending to still be asleep while Tommy was already giggling delightedly and rolling around in bed, Emmy jumped on top of her mother, so she was sitting on her chest and playfully slept Felicity’s cheeks.

“Mommy, you gotta wake up!” she shouted in a happy singsong.

Pretending to be still half asleep, Felicity turned onto her side with a groan, sending Emmy slumping down on the mattress next to her.

“Mommy’s still tired,” Felicity mumbled and turned her face into the pillow to hide her wide grin. “Wake daddy instead.”

The rustling of the blankets could be heard when Emmy crawled over to her dad. Felicity turned her head back, so she could open her eyes just enough to see Emmy climbing over Tommy, who was now lying on his tummy and watching his sister’s movements.

“Daddy,” Emmy whispered, gently stroking over Oliver’s shoulder.

For someone who didn’t know him as well as Felicity did it must look like he didn’t move or react in whatever way, but she could see right through him. She knew he was awake, and she knew that he was actually grinning like an idiot because Emmy was so gentle when trying to wake him up, while she had been so rude with her mother. She would have to tell him that the only reason she was as gentle as she just had been with him, was that they had wrapped him up in cotton wool since he had come home from the hospital.  
They would have to change that soon or Oliver would get used to being spoilt like that.

Though… Felicity really didn’t mind spoiling Oliver. He spoilt them so often!

Anyway, they kept pretending to be asleep. Just to tease Emmy.

“Daddy,” Emmy whispered once again. “Daddy, are you awake?”

“Hm?” Oliver hummed, still staying unmoving while Emmy kept stroking her hand over his naked shoulder gently.

“Daddy, you gotta wake up.”

“Why?” Oliver asked with hoarse voice that did things to Felicity it wasn’t supposed to do, especially with the kids right there.

“Because it’s my birthday!” Emmy exclaimed happily.

“Today?” Oliver asked.

“Yes!”

“No, you have to be wrong. It can’t be today.”

“Yes, daddy. It is today!”

For a long moment nothing happened, and Emmy was just about to move close to her dad and ask him if he had fallen back asleep when Oliver sat up, pulled Emmy against him and turned them, so she was pressed into the mattress in one quick and fluent movement. Emmy was giggling like crazy when her father peppered her little face with lots of kisses. And only now did Felicity get up, too. She rolled over, so she was lying right next to Oliver, and he moved his head to Emmy’s left side, giving Felicity the opportunity to kiss the right side of their daughter’s face.

They only stopped when Tommy made munching noises, signaling that he wanted to be kissed, too. So Felicity sat back on her heels and pulled Tommy into his lap, kissing him.

“Oliver, we gotta…” she said, shooting a meaningful gaze to the door.

Oliver nodded before he turned back around to Emmy and kissed first both of her cheeks, then her chin, her forehead and finally the tip of her nose and then said, “Mommy, Tommy and I will have to go downstairs and grab a few things from the kitchen.”

“A cake?” Emmy whispered.

Oliver winked, making her giggle once more. “You will wait here, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a big grin on her face.

“Promise?” Oliver asked with narrowed eyes.

“Pinky swear,” Emmy offered, holding out her pinky finger for Oliver, and he linked his with hers, saying seriously, “Pinky swear.”

Oliver crawled out of bed and took Tommy from Felicity’s lap, securing the little boy to her chest. Together the three of them left the bedroom while Emmy was lying in bed, still smiling like crazy and watching them leave.

“If we had teased her just a moment longer, she would have exploded,” Felicity whispered to Oliver on their way downstairs.

Oliver chuckled. “She has been so excited about her birthday all week. It was just too good of an opportunity not to use.”

“Absolutely!”

In the kitchen Oliver handed Tommy over to Felicity and got the cake he had baked the day before from the fridge. They had tried to get Emmy to meet with her new best friend Deepa, so they – or rather Oliver – had the time and room to bake the cake, but Emmy had refused to leave her parents.

Although it was a little more than a month ago by now, what had happened to them due to Cupid and Foster still had an influence on them. On all of them. It couldn’t be just washed-

Felicity’s thoughts came to a sudden stop when Oliver kissed her gently, wrapping one arm around her waist, the other around Tommy on her hip. He had almost healed completely by now. He wasn’t back to his best form, but he was working every day on regaining all the strength he needed. It had been amazing how quickly he had recovered!

When their lips parted, Felicity looked at Oliver, and the intensity of his gaze made her whole body tingle comfortably.

“Not today,” Oliver only said, and she knew exactly what he meant.

Those last weeks what had happened to them had been a constant companion in their thoughts. It was impossible to forget, even though normality was slowly settling back in. They were all better. The physical wounds had healed, and the emotional wounds had at least started to.

But they still weren’t completely fine because neither of them could bear the thought of sleeping apart from the kids already and Emmeline hated the thought of spending even an hour away from people that weren’t part of her family or at least so close like family. It was why Deepa had come here yesterday instead Emmy visiting her best friend.

Scars of the soul just needed so much longer to heal.

Felicity took in a deep breath and then breathed out with a sigh. “Not today.”

Oliver stroked his fingers down her cheeks gently before kissing her once more, reminding her that they were all together and safe. He looked at her once again, and Felicity nodded. Oliver was right. Today was not the right day to think about any of that. They had survived, and they were back together by now. That was all that really should matter, especially today.

“Can you believe that she’s already three years old?” Felicity asked, changing the topic on what was really important today.

“I wish I could,” Oliver answered with a chuckle while lightening the candles on the cake, “but it still feels like yesterday when we were lying in the bed with my lips right against your bump, and I was talking to her in there.”

“And now she is already talking and walking and climbing and so much more. Soon she will graduate from school and learn to drive a car and to all the adult things,” Felicity said with a sigh before she pressed a kiss to Tommy’s temple and added, “At least our little buddy here is still very small.”

Tommy released a loud sound, a mixture of a laugh and a cry, and Felicity rubbed her hand over his back comfortingly while simultaneously grabbing his bottle from the kitchen counter and filling it with some cold tea before handing it to Tommy.

“Maybe we should let Emmy get to school before she think about her graduation,” Oliver said with a chuckle. “And I guess if time only flies by half as quickly as it has been the case with Emmy, he will be able to walk and talk and do God knows what else just like Emmy in no time.”

Smirking, Oliver stepped in front of Felicity, putting his hands to the kitchen counter next to her hips, caging her in between his arms and his body. Her heart skipped a beat at how close he was. It had been so long since they had been intimate. First they had been violently separated, and then Oliver had needed to heal. So until now they had found no time to really reconnect to one another physically.

“But, you know,” he said, leaning in and brushing his lips against hers softly, “we can always have more children.”

Laughing, Felicity let her head fall back into her neck. “Really? Look at our children! They are exhausting enough for four!”

Oliver pressed a kiss to the underside of Felicity’s jaw before leaning back and saying, “Maybe the next one will be less exhausting.”

“I gave up hope on that after Tommy,” Felicity replied, kissing Tommy’s temple, and the little boy giggled like he knew exactly what his parents were saying about him.

“Well, I guess I will have to be a little more convincing as soon as the bed is ours again,” Oliver suggested, still smirking.

He tried to lean in to kiss Felicity once more, but Tommy hastily reached out his arm and put his hand to Oliver’s lips, pushing him away.

“I guess our son is trying to remind us of our daughter that is upstairs and waiting for her birthday cake and the presents,” Felicity said with a chuckle, and Oliver nodded.

“You’ll keep Tommy. I’ll take the cake, and the present are…?”

“In our clothing room.”

“Great,” Oliver said, balancing the cake with the three candles on his right hand. “Ready?”

“Ready.”

They strolled back upstairs together. Felicity had trouble keeping Tommy in her arms because the little boy was moving wildly in an attempt to get to the candles. He loved candles!

“No, no, Tommy,” she explained him, taking his hand and pulling it back away from the flames.

In front of the door to the bedroom Felicity stopped and looked back over her shoulder to Oliver, and he nodded. So she opened the door and-

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Emmeline, happy birthday to you!”

Felicity and Oliver watched Tommy crawling over the bed to his sister, putting a hand to her cheek and pressing a gentle kiss to her temple. Emmy giggled, sat up and pulled her little brother into her lap, looking at the cake her parents had baked her.

“Tommy can help me blowing out the candles,” she suggested. “Right, Tommy?”

The boy giggled in agreement, reaching out his hands for the cake.

“Okay, but you gotta hold his hands back from the candles,” Oliver said while slowly leaning down to hold out the cake for the kids.

Immediately Emmy did as her father had told her and pulled Tommy’s hands back to his chest. He wasn’t too delighted about that, but his displeasure seemed forgotten when the cake was in reach. He took in a deep breath, trying to blow out the candle, but there was more spit escaping his lips than air, so it was actually Emmy, who blew out the candles, but Tommy didn’t seem to care. He clapped his hands delightedly.

“Did you make a wish?” Felicity asked.

Emmy nodded. “But I can’t tell, or it won’t come true.”

“That’s true,” Oliver said with a nod. “Do you want your presents now?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed happily.

“Okay, mommy and I will get them then. Just give us a few minutes. You can feed Tommy a little bit of cake in the meantime, but only a few crumbs, okay?” Oliver suggested, taking Felicity’s hand and pulling her with her into the clothing room without waiting for Emmy’s answer.

When he turned around to her after closing the door and wrapped his strong arms around her waist, pulling her flush against him, Felicity cocked her head in question.

“Is there a reason why you pulled me in here with you?” Oliver kissed her neck, sucking on her pulse point and licking over the skin, making Felicity sigh. “Not that I complain.”

“Well, I think it might be my only chance to…” Oliver began, leaving the sentence unfinished to kiss her instead. His lips pressed to hers gently, making her sigh into the kiss, and when he pulled away, he whispered, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” Felicity replied.

“I wish we could have like half an hour in here instead of just a few minutes,” Oliver said, letting his hands move down to cup Felicity’s butt.

“Wouldn’t be fair to let Emmy wait for her presents too long.”

“True,” Oliver said with a sigh. “And since she didn’t want a birthday party this year” – she had stated that all she wanted was to spend the day in bed with her parents and her brother – “we won’t even get to sneak away from the party for a quickie like we did last year.”

“That was fun,” Felicity giggled and straightened up onto her tiptoes to kiss him shortly. “Let’s just hope we will soon find time again.”

“Well, it’s been more than a month already, so I would appreciate if it wasn’t going to take much longer and-“

“Mommy? Daddy? Did you fall asleep?”

At the sound of their daughter’s voice on the other side of the door, Oliver and Felicity both chuckled.

“Come on, let’s give her the presents,” Felicity suggested.

“Yes, we better do,” Oliver said and kissed the tip of her nose before he took a step back.

He bent down to grab the bag of presents Felicity had hidden under one of the shelves and pulled it towards him. When he turned back around to Felicity, he caught her eyes focused on where his butt must have been a few seconds before.

“Enjoying the view?”

Felicity didn’t even try to hide the smirk on her face when she replied, “Very.”

Winking at him, she turned around to the door and opened it. Present time had come!


	117. Okay again

Just when she was about to duck down under his arm and punch him into the side strongly, Oliver changed the position of his arm, blocking her punch and pushing her down, so she ended up slumped on the floor. Again.

“Get up,” Oliver only ordered with harsh voice. Again.

So Felicity took in a deep breath, ignoring all the hurting parts of her body which actually meant every part of her body, got up from the floor and back into her starting position. Again.

“Next round,” Oliver announced, nodding to her as a sign for her to start, and Felicity had to suppress a groan since she knew exactly that this round wasn’t going to end any different from the others. Again.

This hadn’t been what she had wanted. Neither had this been what she had expected.

When Oliver had come back from his first night out on the streets three days ago, he had told her that he wanted to train her in self-defense which was a first since she knew him because Oliver had never been too happy about the idea to train Felicity. He wanted to keep her away from danger. So Felicity had assumed that Oliver’s training was more a sexy reunion after the long time of abstinence when first she had been taken and then he had been wounded.

She couldn’t have been more wrong obviously. Because in the three hours they had been training by now the closest she had come to touching him had been her hand on his forearm when she had tried to block one of his pretended punches.

The last three hours he had ordered her to attack him over and over and over again. And every time he had made her slump down to the floor in less than two minutes. He hadn’t even really given her a chance at trying anything. He blocked whatever attempt she had made to attack him immediately. So every part of her body hurt. Everything hurt so badly, Felicity didn’t even know how she still got herself to get back up on her feet every time he ordered her to.

This wasn’t sexy training. This wasn’t any training actually. This was… She didn’t know what it was, but she knew it wasn’t training.

Oliver’s movement caught her off guard. She had been too deep in her thoughts to realize that her lack of activity had made him take the first step. With one fluent movement he put his leg behind hers and pushed at her shoulders with his hands firmly, sending her falling back down on the floor. Again.

Felicity was lucky that she snapped out of her thoughts soon enough to turn in the midst of the fall and reached out her arms to catch herself because otherwise she would have probably bumped her head on the floor. Unfortunately, though, the movement got her wrist twisted when she fell down onto it, and a violent jolt of pain ripped right through her whole arm.

“Get up,” Oliver already ordered again.

It took a lot in Felicity to not start crying because her wrist just really hurt, and she was tired and barely able to move anymore, and she really didn’t want Oliver to push her to the floor again. So she got up on her feet, still staying crouched down on the floor with her wrist held to her chest, and took in slightly sniffling breath.

“Hey, you’re okay?” Oliver asked, his voice sounding so much gentler than it had the whole night, and she could feel him crouching down right beside her before he put a hand to her shoulder, squeezing comfortingly. “Felicity?”

“I’m fine,” she said hurriedly, moving away from his touch and straightening up.

Oliver got back up only half a second after her. And when she turned around and looked at him, whatever gentleness had been in his voice couldn’t be found in his face. His facial expression was just as hard as it had been before. It showed no sign of worry or anything but what she wasn’t sure but assumed was anger.

“You have to concentrate,” he told her strictly. “If you don’t concentrate, you-“

“I am tired. Can we please just stop for tonight?” Felicity asked between gritted teeth.

Oliver’s face hardened at that even more, and he crossed his arms in front of his chest, eying her up.

“Felicity, bad guys don’t just stop when you tell them.”

“Yeah, but there is no bad guy here at the moment.”

“Luckily,” Oliver replied. “But when the next bad guy comes-“

“Just shut up!” Felicity suddenly yelled, the anger that had been gathering in the pit of her stomach the last three hours breaking out of her now. “There is no bad guy here right now! And even if he was, I wouldn’t know what to do other then admitting defeat because if the last three hours have proven anything it’s that I am not able to hold myself! And now I am tired, and I want to go home to my kids!”

She took a step forward, trying to get past him, but Oliver just stepped into her way, never taking his eyes off her.

“Bad guys might get to you when you are tired. So what?” he asked. “You tell them you’re tired and expect them to disappear?”

“I already told you there is no bad guy here right now,” Felicity replied, again trying to get past him without success.

“What if I was a bad guy?” Oliver asked her, the tone of his voice so terribly provocative that it only made her angrier. “What if I was a bad guy, and you were tired, but I threatened your life?”

“Oliver, stop it.”

“What if I threatened Emmy’s or Tommy’s life?”

“I said stop it.”

“What if I hurt Emmy right in front of your eyes?!”

The question echoed through the silence almost violently, only accompanied by Oliver’s and Felicity’s heavy breathing as they stared at each other angrily.

“Don’t you think that I tried to fight them?”

Felicity’s whisper was barely audible in how loud the silence seemed to sound though it was weird because silence was most definitely supposed to be soundless. This silence was deafeningly loud, making it almost impossible to hear anything else but the silence.

Tears welled in Felicity’s eyes when she took a step closer to Oliver, asking in a whisper that was only quieter than the last, “Don’t you think that I tried to stop them from taking us? Don’t you think that I tried to prevent that Emmy and Tommy had to go through any of that? Don’t you think that I tried to stop Foster from hurting Emmy? I couldn’t, okay? I couldn’t stop him, so you’re probably right to let me suffer through this because it’s my fault that-“

When her tears and sobs made it impossible for her to say anything more, Oliver reached out his arms for her and pulled her flush against him, holding her so close Felicity had trouble breathing. And still she only clawed her hands into the fabric of his shirt and pushed herself even closer, so she could press her ear to his chest and listen to the beat of his heart. She cried in his arms like that, just letting Oliver hold her.

Since it had happened, she had thought about it every night. She had thought about how Cupid and Foster had come into their home and just taken her and the kids. She had thought about how Foster had hit Emmy right in front of her eyes. And she had thought about how much worse everything could have ended.

Because of her.  
Because she hadn’t been able to stop Cupid and Foster from taking them.  
Because she hadn’t been able to protect their children from any of it.

“I’m so sorry,” she sobbed when she could force enough breath into her lungs to get any word out. “I’m so-“

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Oliver interrupted her, pressing his lips to the crown of her head. “It wasn’t your fault. It really wasn’t your fault. I didn’t want to make you think that I thought that because I don’t think that. I never did, and I-“

“But it was my fault,” Felicity sobbed, turning her face, so she could hide it against his chest. “It was my fault. I didn’t protect them. I didn’t-“

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered, pushing her just enough away that he could put his hands to her cheeks, rub his thumbs over her cheekbones to wipe away some of the tears and kiss her gently. When he pulled back, his eyes showed the gentleness they had missed earlier the night. “What happened wasn’t your fault. It was not my fault, and it was not your fault. What I said… I was angry at myself for not being there, so I took it all out on you. And I am so, so sorry for that.”

“But-“

“No”, Oliver interrupted her firmly, his voice leaving no room for objection. “This was not your fault. This was Cupid’s and Foster’s fault. Nobody else’s. I’m so sorry for yelling at you and everything else. I’m so sorry.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, feeling the gentleness of Oliver’s voice and the intensity of his gaze calming her down slowly. And it actually made her chuckle.

“Since when am I the one blaming myself, and you’re the one to saying that it’s not my fault?” she asked, leaning her face a little more into Oliver’s touch. “Isn’t it usually the other way around?”

“I think I promised you to be strong for the both of us whenever you would feel weak.”

“Can’t remember that promise,” Felicity replied.

“So I give it to you know,” Oliver said and kissed her gently before he pulled back again and vowed, “I promise to be strong for the both of us whenever you feel weak.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Oliver pulled her back against him, hugging her close, so she could snuggle up to the warmth of his body and rest her ear back over his heart, listening to his heartbeat. She needed to hear it like she needed air. Her hands stroked up and down the hard muscles of his back, while Oliver’s hands rested on her hips, the tips of his fingers grazing her butt.

“How about we head home, and I run a bath for you, and you relax in the bathtub with a glass of wine, and then I give you a massage to make up for the hard training?” Oliver suggested, pressing his lips against the crown of her head and breathing her in. “Now that we’re okay again.”

At those words Felicity pulled back slightly, so she could look into Oliver’s eyes when she said, “But we’re not okay again yet.”

“Felicity, what-?”

Felicity interrupted Oliver’s words by straightening up on her tiptoes and pressing her lips to his in a gentle but firm kiss. Her hands moved from his shoulders that she had used to push herself up against him down over his clothed chest – one more sign that it hadn’t been real training because when she was present, he never trained with a shirt on – to the hem of his shirt, lifting it and hence leaving no doubt in what she wanted and needed for them to really be okay again.

She pushed at his shirt until it was right under his chin, and then pulled away just enough to lift it over his head and take it off. Carelessly she let the fabric fall to the floor, already pressing her lips to Oliver’s again, and he tightened his hold on her, so Felicity’s body was pressed to his naked chest as tightly as possible. She could feel the outline of his abs against her stomach, turning her on beyond everything.

When Oliver’s tongue traced the seam of her lips, Felicity opened up to him with a sigh, and immediately their tongues met in a familiar dance. Impatiently Felicity tugged at the waistband of his sweatpants, pushing them down over his butt until they pooled around his ankles. Oliver kicked them away hastily, slipping off his shoes and socks at the same time, leaving him in only his boxers.

“You’re being impatient tonight,” Oliver mumbled against her lips when Felicity jumped up at him, wrapping her legs around his hips and her arms around his neck.

“Always when it’s about you,” Felicity replied. “And now get down.”

Oliver growled at her bossy voice which he knew she knew turned him on. And of course he followed her request and sat down on the training mats with Felicity sitting in his lap, moving on top of him. Oliver’s hands moved from her hips under the fabric of his top, his rough fingertips scratching over the soft skin of Felicity’s back and eliciting goose bumps on their path. He moved the tips of his fingers up slowly until he reached the small scar on her shoulder, stroking the scarred skin gently, before he took off her top completely, letting her sports bra follow.

When Oliver’s lips moved down her neck, Felicity’s arms tightened around his neck for a short minute. His lips felt so great on her skin, and she wanted them to keep worshipping her neck and her breasts as she knew they were moving to because now that she didn’t breastfeed anymore since much to her regret Tommy had just neglected her breasts after he had gotten back from Cupid. But she had other plans that didn’t allow her to let him continue. So Felicity put her hands to Oliver’s shoulders and pushed until Oliver lay back.

Their eyes met, and Felicity’s whole body started tingling from the way Oliver looked at her. His gaze was so intense that she felt it crawling right under her skin. There was love and lust and passion and longing in them, and it all made her want him even more.

Slowly Felicity leaned down, brushing her lips against his, but she didn’t allow him to really kiss her. Instead she lowered her lips to his jaw and kissed down his neck. She had memorized his body in her mind a long time ago. She knew every muscle, every scar. And even now that he had gained new ones, she still knew exactly where to locate them.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered almost desperately when her lips met the scar on his shoulder, the scar he had gained from one of the bullets he had taken for her when he had rescued her from Foster.

His hands moved from her shoulders to her hips, guiding her movements on top of him, so her clothed center was dragged perfectly over his erection every time. Felicity moaned, her lips still against his scar, worshipping it. She had done that with each of his scars, worshipping them as a sign that she accepted them as a part of him without any objections.

She continued worshipping that scare for a while before she moved her lips more and more down his body to the next scar Foster had left on him right next to his abs. Her right hand moved from his heart down his chest over his abs, tracing the defined muscles with the tips of her fingers gently. She had to move her hips away from his to keep kissing that second scar, so she moved her fingertips even further down and stroked him through the thin fabric of his boxers.

“Felicity,” Oliver groaned her name again, and Felicity could feel his hands moving down to her butt, trying to move her hips back to his, but she refused to let herself be moved so easily.

She stayed where she was lying between his legs, only moving her head to the scar the third of Foster’s bullets had left even lower on Oliver’s chest. Her hand stayed where it was, stroking his erection. While Felicity moved her feet, so she could get rid of her shoes and socks, Oliver’s hand tangled in her hair, pulling out the bun, so her hair fell loosely around her face.

When Oliver whispered Felicity’s name once more, his hips thrusting against her hand impatiently, Felicity decided that maybe she had teased and worshipped his scars enough for now. So she kissed a path back up his body until she was sitting in his lap again, her lips only half an inch away from his.

“Hi,” she whispered, leaning her forehead against his.

“Hi,” Oliver replied, stroking her hair out of her face and away behind his ear.

How come that even after all these years they were together now, her heart still made a jump whenever he whispered to her with from lust husky voice? It should be impossible, and yet that was how it was for her.

Slowly she leaned down, meeting his lips in a gentle kiss. Her breasts pressed against his chest tightly, making her nipples harden. Her hips started moving on top of his again, but it only took a second before she couldn’t take it anymore. She needed him inside of her, and she needed him inside of her now.

Oliver seemed to notice her growing need and if the way he hastily sat up, grabbed her sports leggings and ripped them apart to take them off of her without making it necessary for her to move too much was any indication, he wasn’t exactly patient about being inside of her, either.

Their underwear came off last before Felicity got up on her knees, hovering above Oliver’s erection that he took hold of to position himself at her entrance. Their eyes locked, and Felicity felt a flutter in her stomach at how intense and loving his eyes were. She stroked her hand through the hair at the back of his head gently when she slowly sank down on him, taking him in to the hilt.

For a long moment that they adjusted to being fully reunited with each other again, their eyes stayed locked. They could look at each other forever, losing the sense for anything around them without feeling lost because they found themselves in each other. Their hearts beat in unison as they breathed the same air, only feeling each other.

They leaned forward at the same time, their lips meeting half-way in a gentle even if slightly desperate kiss. Felicity moved on to of Oliver, using the strength of her thighs to move up a little before pressing down hurriedly, never breaking their contact or moving away too much. Her arms were wrapped around his neck tightly, keeping him to her even though his strong arms around her waist didn’t seem to want to let go of her anyway.

When Oliver thrust up, Felicity moaned at the unexpected movement and let her head fall back, giving Oliver the opportunity to move his lips down her neck. He sucked at her pulse point, most likely leaving a hickey there, but Felicity didn’t mind. She had stopped minding the marks he loved to leave on the well visible spots of her body a long time ago.

Oliver’s lips moved lower, his tongue flicking over her collarbone, his teeth gently grazing her skin. The movements of Felicity’s hips became quicker and more urgent when Oliver’s lips closed around her right nipple, his tongue flattening against the sensitive skin. Her stomach tightened, and a comfortable shiver ran down the length of her spine. Oliver bit down on her nipple gently, soothing the bite by circling her nipple with his tongue. Another moan escaped her lips.

“Oliver.”

He could hear how close she was from the way she whispered his name as roughly and as desperately as she did. So he let go of her nipple, resting his head back in his neck, so he could lock eyes with Felicity. His arms tightened around her waist when he felt her inner walls clamping around him, signaling that her release was close. Felicity moved one hand into his hair, gripping a fistful, when the movements of her hips became even quicker.

She felt her stomach tightening right before the familiar tingling in her toes started. And only two thrusts later the tingling spread all over her body when she fell over the edge with his name on her lips. Still she kept moving on top of him, prolonging her orgasm and triggering Oliver’s when her walls clamped around him particularly tightly.

Their eyes stayed locked until Felicity’s movements slowly came to a stop, and Oliver let his head sink to her chest, pressing his ear to her heart. Felicity rested her chin on top of his head, her fingertips moving through his head caringly.

“Now we’re okay again,” Felicity whispered. She pressed a firm kiss to his hair before snuggling her cheek to the crown of his head, keeping him close to her. “More than okay actually.”

Oliver just hummed against her skin in response, moving his nose against her skin to breathe in her scent. His stubble scratched her where it rested against her chest, and Felicity could already feel her need for a second round grow inside of her at the feeling.

“How about we just sleep here?” Oliver asked, pulling her close to him. “I could just lie back, and we could sleep.”

“If anyone of the team finds us, they will kill us.”

“I’d die happy,” Oliver sighed, moving his cheek against her once more, making her groan at how great that felt. She could feel him smile against her skin, and it made her smile, too. “Very happy.”

Felicity chuckled. “Me, too. And still I think-“

The loud beeping of one of the computers made her stop midsentence, turning her head around without moving out of where she was sitting in Oliver’s lap.

“Why does that sound like work to me?” Oliver asked growly. “I don’t want to get up.”

“Then stay here, and I’ll check,” Felicity said and already tried to move off of Oliver, but he was still holding her close against him.

“I don’t want you to get up, either,” Oliver replied.

Chuckling, Felicity grabbed a fistful of his hair again and bent his head back to make him look at her.

“Let me take a quick look and see what it is, so we can soon go for round two,” Felicity suggested. “The sooner I know it’s not something the team is needed for, the sooner we can continue.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to her chest right between her breasts and nodded. “Okay.”

They both groaned when Felicity lifted herself, making Oliver slip out of her and creating a delicious friction by that. While she pulled his discarded shirt close and put it on, Oliver grabbed her ripped leggings, cleaning up her thighs.

Felicity had trouble getting back up on her feet. Her legs felt wobbly from her orgasm, and every muscle hurt from whatever they had done the three hours before. Oliver steadied her with his hands to her hips and only let go when she took the first step forwards and stepped out of his reach. She almost ran over to her work station, partly because she didn’t trust her legs to carry her for too long and partly because the floor was terribly cold under her naked feet.

“Scratch the second round,” Felicity said as soon as she had sat down.

“Hey, I only let you go to check because you kind of promised there will be a second round,” Oliver replied, and without having to turn around Felicity could hear him move and approach her. “What happened?”

“It’s Barry,” Felicity explained. “He needs help. Laurel is already there because she visited her mother, but they could use your help.”

Oliver leaned over her shoulder, reading what she saw on the screen.

“Okay, that sounds serious,” he admits. “But I don’t feel ready to leave you and the kids yet.”

Felicity turned her head to look at him, putting her hand on his on her shoulder. “The longer we wait to leave the other again for a couple of days, the harder it will be when we have to.”

“Yeah,” Oliver said with a sigh, looking around like he was searching for any reason not to go. Then he looked at her, stating, “Unfortunately I don’t have a suit.”

The hood hadn’t survived the three bullets Foster had shot at Oliver. Felicity had tried to save it, but it really hadn’t had any use. So the last days Oliver had gone out in John’s gear which had only worked because there hadn’t been any big incidents that had made it necessary for everyone to be in the field together. It had caught the attention of the media already, though. They were following young death in the city to figure out whether the Arrow had died.

“I can’t go out there without my suit.”

“That’s the cue.”

“The cue for what?” Oliver asked when Felicity got up from her chair and tugged at Oliver’s hand for him to follow her to the back part of the lair. “Where are we… what’s that?”

Felicity smiled, stepping forward to grab the fabric she had put over the large glass box and pulled it aside, revealing a new suit in the glass box. She watched Oliver’s eyes widen, taking the green leather gear in.

“A new suit,” he said, his voice showing surprise and excitement at the same time. “When did you-?”

“The suit is actually not that new,” Felicity explained. “It had been supposed to be a Christmas present two years back, but prenatal depression and everything… Well, I didn’t give it to you back then and then I never found the right time. Giving it to you last Christmas felt wrong… Like giving you an old present, so I thought now that the hood is actually destroyed…”

She didn’t finish the sentence, just gesturing around with her hand that he didn’t still hold in his insecurely. She tried to figure out what he was thinking. She knew how much the old hood had meant to him, and she had thought about getting him a new suit for a very long time.

“You know, you’ve grown so much since you’ve started this,” she suddenly heard herself say so quickly that she tripped over her own words, “and I just thought that the new you deserved a new suit, and so I called Cisco, and we put a lot of work into it. But I totally get if you don’t want this one and want your old one back.  I am sure we will find a way to-“

She was interrupted when Oliver pressed his lips to her gently, framing her face with his big hands. Felicity leaned against him, putting her hands to his wrists.

“I love the new suit,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome.”

“It’s sleeveless.”

“Cisco’s idea,” Felicity grinned, revealing that it had definitely not been Cisco’s idea. “He said it will look totally badass.”

“Well, if he says so,” Oliver replied, kissing the tip of her nose. “I guess I should put on some clothes then, right?”

“Luckily you have a few spare clothes here because I don’t think you will get your shirt here back.”

“Looks better on you anyway.”

“That’s true.”

So Oliver got dressed, while Felicity went back to her work station and sent Barry a quick message that Oliver was already on his way. When Oliver got back, she hugged him tightly, pressing her ear to his chest and listen to his heartbeat for a few seconds. Oliver held her close, his strong arms making her feel like she couldn’t be in a safer place.

“Be careful,” she whispered, leaning her head back.

Oliver kissed her gently, stroking his hands over her butt while he did so, making Felicity chuckle against his lips.

“When I am back, you get the bath and massage I promised you,” he swore. “And then we will go for round two.”

“Sounds great,” Felicity replied.

They looked at each other for a long time, neither of them saying a word until Oliver sighed.

“I don’t want to let you go and leave you.”

“It’s just for a few days. You’ll be back with us in no time.”

Oliver nodded. “I am going to call you at least five times a day.”

“That’s the least I expect.”

Oliver leaned down, kissing her one more time before he slowly pulled away and left, only turning around one last time at the bottom of the stairs to air-kiss Felicity, making her heart jump in her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we all know who is in Central City...   
> Just saying!


	118. Code of silence

_“Samantha, there is someone in my life now. Please, don't make me keep this from her.”_

_“Oliver, you will if you want a relationship with my son. These are my conditions. You've already asked the world of me, I'm just asking for the same in return.”_

 

“Can you see daddy yet?”

Felicity shot a quick gaze over her shoulder to where Emmy was kneeling on the counter top and staring out of the window like she had for the last twenty minutes since Felicity had started feeding Tommy. When the little boy made a dissatisfied sound, signaling that he wanted the next spoon of puree, Felicity hastily turned back around to him and pushed the next spoon into the little boy’s mouth.

“No,” Emmy said with a sigh. “But daddy’s coming back tonight, right?”

“Yes, he is,” Felicity replied, trying to feed Tommy the next spoon, but he turned his head away and yawned. “I think your brother needs to go to bed.”

“But daddy’s not home yet!” Emmy objected.

Sighing, Felicity lifted Tommy from the highchair into her arms, and he let his head sink down onto her shoulder immediately, yawning once more. It was long past bedtime for him, but Felicity had expected Oliver to be home sooner and hence she had delayed feeding Tommy or taking him to bed, so Oliver could see him when he came home. When Oliver had called this morning, he had told her that he should be home by six, and now it was already eight-thirty.

And Felicity was worried. Oliver had a reputation for being late, but he had never been home late, especially since Emmy had been born. Adding that he had sounded very off at the phone earlier today, Felicity felt like she had every right to worry.

Or was she just exaggerating?

She knew that Oliver wasn’t good at dealing with being away from them. His nightmares got worse when he wasn’t home with them. And given what had happened to them earlier this year, Felicity could only assume how much worse it must have been for him this time. But she still thought it had been the right decision to ask him to go to Central City because if they had waited any longer to separate for a few days, it would have only gotten worse. And she assumed that it had been bad for him already, just as much as it had been bad for her and the kids.

But wasn’t that only one more reason for why he should be home already?

When Tommy released another dissatisfied sound, Felicity rubbed her son’s back and turned around to Emmeline. “I am going to put Tommy to bed. If daddy’s not home then, you and I will watch a movie and wait for him to come back, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy replied, not taking her eyes off the street where she knew her daddy had to appear sooner or later.

Strolling upstairs to Tommy’s nursery, Felicity once again tried to figure out what could have upset Oliver.

Had he killed someone again?  
Had someone gotten hurt?  
Had his nightmares gotten worse?  
Had Slade Wilson escaped from the island and was now after them?

Felicity shook her head. None of that really made sense.

But what else could it be?

When she tickled the underside of his naked feet while changing him into his pajama, Tommy kicked his feet at her, and Felicity grabbed them to kiss them, making him giggle.

“Are you tired?” she asked when he yawned once more and rubbed his little fists over his eyes. Tommy’s response was another yawn that made Felicity chuckle. “Oh, yes. You are so very tired. Well, it’s already late, and you’re still just a small, little baby, aren’t you? You-“

“Daddy!”

Felicity felt her heart skip a beat before it started racing in her chest, pounding against her ribs firmly. Oliver was home – finally!

“We’re gonna say hello to daddy, and then I’ll put you to bed, buddy,” Felicity suggested, kissing Tommy’s cheek before cradling him against her chest and carrying him downstairs.

She had just reached the middle of the stairs when she stopped at what she saw right at the door. Oliver had gotten down on his knees, holding Emmy incredibly tightly to his chest while his face was buried against the sight of her neck. And if the shaking of his body was any indication, he was most likely not okay at all.

The low cry Tommy released, called Oliver’s attention on them. He lifted his face from Emmy’s neck to look at them with tear-filled eyes that made Felicity’s heart skip another beat.

Oliver was not okay. He was not even anywhere near okay.

“Oliver?” she asked in a whisper, watching him closely to try and find whatever had happened to him, whatever was torturing him, but she couldn’t find anything.

Slowly he approached the two of them with Emmy in his arms and before Felicity could say anything or ask him what was going on, he had already wrapped his free arm around her waist, pulling Felicity close and pressing his lips to hers. It was a desperate kiss. His tongue slipped into her mouth, desperately seeking her comfort, while his arm tightened around her so much, it made her ribs hurt badly, but instead of saying anything she just kept responding to the kiss.

When their lips parted, Oliver didn’t let go. He kept her close against him, snuggling his cheek to the top of her head and sighing. Soothingly Felicity rubbed her hand over his muscular back, still feeling him shaking under her touch.

“What’s wrong?” she whispered so quietly that nobody but Oliver could hear.

 But Oliver pulled away, shortly shaking his head, before he looked at Emmeline. “Hey, sweetie, can you get yourself ready for bed while I put your little brother to bed?”

“Will you read me a story then?”

“Of course,” Oliver replied, his voice breaking.

“Okay,” Emmy said. When Oliver set her down on the floor, she immediately ran upstairs, only turning her head back over her shoulder to yell, “Night, mommy!”

“Night, baby!” Felicity called back, her eyes never leaving Oliver’s face.

“What-?”

“I am going to put Tommy to bed, read Emmy a story, and then we will have to talk,” he told her, avoiding to look at her, while he was already lifting Tommy from her arms and against his chest. The little boy snuggled his cheek to his father’s shoulder, closing his eyes with a deep sigh.

“Oli-“

“Give me twenty minutes,” he asked.

A single tear rolled down his cheek, and Felicity already lifted her hand to wipe it away, but Oliver was faster, wiping it away himself. He pressed a short kiss to her lips, firm and reassuring but not as desperate as the last one had been. He pulled away and went upstairs without saying anything more or giving Felicity the chance to say anything more.

This was bad. She hadn’t seen Oliver like this since… Felicity wasn’t even sure when she had seen him like this the last time. She assumed that he must have been like this while she and the kids had been abducted or when her pregnancy depression had made him feel like she was drifting away from him. So, yes, it was bad. Like really, really, really bad.

Felicity started walking up and down in the living room, trying to figure out what it could be that had happened for the umpteenth time today. But nothing new came to her mind, and the scenarios she had pictured earlier that day already were only giving her stomach cramps. And that wasn’t helping.

When Oliver stepped into the living room half an hour later with his shoulders slumped and his head ducked down, Felicity stood still where she had still been walking up and down and watched her husband closely. He kept his eyes on the floor while he was walking to the couch where he sank down into the cushions with a deep sigh, leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

He looked tired out; more tired than he usually was after the more exhausting nights in the field. For somebody who knew him less than Felicity knew him it might look like he was relaxed, but she knew him too well to be wrong about it. He was exhausted. And that was never a good sign. Because Oliver wasn’t someone to get exhausted easily.

“You’re watching me,” he suddenly said, not moving or opening his eyes.

“You’re worrying me,” Felicity replied.

She stayed where she was, knowing that sometimes when Oliver really wasn’t feeling okay on his worst days, he needed his room and couldn’t even have her close. Those days had become less in the last years, but sometimes they were still there. And Felicity accepted that.

But Oliver held out his hand for her, making a ‘come here’ gesture with his index finger, still not opening his eyes. Felicity didn’t waste any second. Hastily she walked over to him and took the hand he had held out for her. Oliver pulled her close until she was sitting in his lap, with her legs outstretched on the couch beside him. She reached out her hand, the one he didn’t hold in his, and put it to his cheek, gently stroking her fingers through his stubble, and Oliver wordlessly snuggled his face into her touch. He turned his head to kiss the palm of her hand and then put his free hand to her wrist, keeping her hand where it was.

“I’m still worried,” Felicity whispered, leaning her body against his chest a little more, while she kept watching him. “Talk to me.”

It took two heartbeats longer before he finally opened his eyes and looked at her. His usually piercing blue eyes seemed slightly darker and definitely more tired than they usually were.

“I have a son.”

Felicity frowned slightly.

Usually it were special days that reminded him of what he had lost – his mother, his father, his best friend Tommy – and how those people had never gotten the chance to meet his kids. But it wasn’t Tommy Merlyn’s birthday. Neither was it the anniversary of his death. Same with Oliver’s dad and mom.

“What about Tommy?”

“No, not-“ Oliver started but broke off, just looking at her for a long moment. “I’m not talking about Tommy.”

“What?”

Sighing, Oliver let go of Felicity’s wrist, putting his hand to her thigh and stroking his hand slowly up and down. His eyes never left her face.

“Do you remember when I told you about the girl I got pregnant early in 2007 before I left on the Gambit?”

Felicity nodded. She knew about that. They had talked about that twice, once while they had been engaged, and once more a few months ago.

“I thought she had had a miscarriage,” Felicity whispered.

“So did I. I really did,” Oliver answered. “But…  I met her in Central City, and she had this little boy at her side, and… turns out my mother offered her a lot of money to pretend that she had a miscarriage, leave Starling and never come back. She didn’t take the money, but she left nonetheless.”

Wow, Felicity thought. She had never liked Moira. Since the moment she had confronted Moira about Thea’s paternity, Felicity had actually really, really not liked her. And she knew that Moira probably had had her reasons for offering her grandchild’s mother money, and Felicity was even sure that it had been well-meant reasons to protect Oliver because protecting her children had been what she had always tried to do, but still Felicity couldn’t help but be angry at her deceased mother-in-law.

When she looked into Oliver’s face right now, seeing the pain in his eyes, Felicity felt all his pain with him. Admittedly, before the island Oliver hadn’t been the guy he was now, but it would have been his decision how to deal with becoming a father.

Maybe he wouldn’t have been a good father.  
Maybe he would have walked out of that child’s life because he hadn’t been ready for the responsibility – a thought that pained Felicity beyond belief given what she had been through with her father.  
But either way it should have been his decision.

“Felicity, I have a twelve-year-old son.”

“God, you’re so old,” it slipped Felicity’s mind before she had wasted any thought on it, and she felt heat forming in her cheeks when Oliver cocked his head at her. “Uhm… sorry. So not the appropriate reaction in this situation, but… you, know… you have a twelve-year-old son…. So you’re kind of old which isn’t any more appropriate than it had been when I said it the last time, and I will stop talking, so you can tell me everything I need to know, in three, two, one.”

Felicity pressed her lips together tightly and pulled her lips into her mouth, signaling Oliver with her hand that she was done babbling, and he could continue to speak. Her stomach fluttered comfortably when she saw the slightest smile on Oliver’s lips. Sometimes her inappropriate babbling had something good.

“His name is William. He turned twelve years old in November. He and his mother, Samantha Clayton, live in Central City in the house she grew up in. She’s a nurse, working in Central City Hospital. William is… he loves playing superheroes.”

“Well, I guess it’s in his genes,” Felicity responded, stroking her hand over his chest gently.

“Unfortunately he is completely into the Flash.”

Felicity chuckled. “Better don’t let Barry hear that.”

At that Oliver’s facial expression changed, and he moved uncomfortably, so Felicity slid off of his lap and next to him on the couch. Their hands found each other’s on the backrest of the couch, their fingers entangling immediately.

“Felicity,” Oliver started, looking at her intensely. “Nobody can know.”

“Know about what?” Felicity asked, feeling like it was more than Oliver’s son being into the Flash.

“William,” Oliver answered. “Nobody can know about William.”

“Why?”

“Because it has been Samantha’s condition for me to get to know him.”

Felicity frowned. “You needed to promise her that you won’t tell anyone?”

Oliver nodded, gripping her hand a little more tightly. He lowered his gaze to their entwined fingers for a short moment before he looked at her again.

“Samantha wants to make sure that I am serious about being a part of William’s life, and as long as she isn’t sure about that, she doesn’t want everyone to know about him.”

“But you told me,” Felicity whispered.

“Not telling you has never been an option,” Oliver stated firmly, lifting their joint hands to his lips and kissing her knuckles. “I- I should have probably told you as soon as I knew, but I felt like telling you on the phone would be-“

Felicity interrupted him by shaking her head and putting her hand to his chest right over his heart, looking at him intensely until he nodded, signaling that he understood. He had told her as soon as he had been able to. He had told her on the phone that there was something he needed to talk to her about, and he had told her about what had happened as soon as he had taken the kids to bed and reminded himself of what a good dad he really was.

It was all – maybe even more than – she could have asked for.

“So you’re risking having a relationship with William by telling me?”

“I did risk it when I told Samantha that I will keep William a secret from everyone but you,” Oliver corrected. “I told her that I just couldn’t keep a major secret like this from you because it wouldn’t be fair to you or me and to be honest not even to William. How can you raise a child and expect it to be honest with you and the rest of the worlds when all you do is setting an example of lies?”

Felicity put her free hand to his cheek, stroking her fingers through his stubble once more gently.

“Do you know that I am very proud of you?”

Oliver snuggled his face into her touch. “I am not sure that you have any reason to. It’s mainly selfish reasons why I had to tell you. I could never do this without you.”

“I have _every_ reason to be proud of you,” Felicity only replied.

Sighing, Oliver closed his eyes for a few moments. He still looked exhausted and tired, but the tortured expression had disappeared. Luckily. Felicity bit the inside of her cheek. She had so many questions, but Oliver looked so tired, and it only made her want to hold him close to her while he slept.

“You look like you have questions.”

“You have your eyes closed,” Felicity replied with slight frown.

“And still I can see you right in front of my eyes,” Oliver replied with a tired smile. “Ask whatever you want to.”

“Does William know you’re his father?”

“Samantha will tell him before I visit them in two weeks,” Oliver answered, opening his eyes. “She says maybe it’s better when he learns from her without me being there, so William has time to process and decide whether he even wants to see me again.”

“What will she tell him why you haven’t been in his life before?” Felicity asked, massaging the back of Oliver’s neck.

“She will tell him that we were young, and we weren’t in love, and then I basically died, and…” Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Actually I don’t really know.”

“Well, it’s gonna be hard for him when he finds out that you weren’t part of his life but have other children who you’re a great dad to as Emmy will probably tell him as soon as-“ When she was the hurt expression in Oliver’s eyes, Felicity hastily interrupted herself, stroking her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck gently. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you or something. I just thought you should be prepared for when he asks and-“

“I… It’s not about that,” Oliver explained. “When I said nobody can know… that actually included Emmy and Tommy.”

“Oh,” Felicity said.

“Yeah,” he whispered, rubbing his hand over her knee. “Samantha says I am the only one who can meet him for a while, and I know that really sucks, especially for you and-“

Felicity put her hand over his lips, making him stop talking.

“I am a mother,” she stated when he looked at her, “so I understand the need to protect my children. Samantha doesn’t really know you, and she doesn’t know me at all. If we got divorced, and you would meet someone knew, I wouldn’t let that woman near my children for a while, either. And unlike Samantha I already trust you.”

Oliver frowned at her. “In what terrible alternate universe would we ever get divorced?”

Felicity chuckled, leaning down and kissing Oliver gently. He pulled her close until she was sitting in his lap again. She could feel him melting into the backrest of the couch, and in response she melted against his chest with a sigh.

She still couldn’t believe that he had a twelve-year-old son, and the fact that his son was four times as old as Emmeline was only part of the reason for that.

Oliver had a son; a son he had only known for like the blink of a second. His son had grown up thinking his dad was either dead or not interested or whatever. Felicity knew how that felt.

But at least William would have the chance to finally get to know his dad and have him in his life when he wanted to. It would probably be confusing for him, but if he let Oliver into his life, it would be so great for him, for the both of them actually. Oliver was such an important part of her kids’ life he would be a great part of William’s, too. Felicity was sure of that.

When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against Felicity’s with a sigh before he whispered, “I am so tired. Learning about William, risking ever getting to know him because I didn’t want to lie to you, realizing what I’ve missed with him … I am so tried.”

Felicity stroked her hand over his head one last time before she first kissed his forehead and then whispered, “Come here.”

Oliver rested his head on her chest, listening to the beat of her heart. Felicity held him tightly to her, rubbing her hand over his back slowly. She rested her chin on top of Oliver’s head, closing her eyes when she suddenly felt unbelievably tired, too.

“I will tell you every detail about what happened and everything there is to know tomorrow, okay?”

“Gladly,” Felicity replied.

“But I could also tell you know.”

“Let’s just sleep,” Felicity whispered into his hair.

She knew he wanted to really be honest with her and let her in on everything, but she also knew that he was tired and exhausted and needed the rest. So really she could wait to get to know the details. For now she just needed to know that Oliver was going to be okay once the news had really been processed.

“Do you think we should go to bed?” Oliver mumbled, already half-asleep.

“Too tired,” Felicity whispered, turning her head to snuggle her cheek to the crown of Oliver’s head. “Let’s just sleep here.”

“Okay.”

Breathing in the scent of his hair, Felicity realized how much she had missed Oliver. She had missed him so much. The worry after his phone call had distracted her of how much she had missed him during the time he had spent apart from her and the kids in Central City. She was glad he was back home because as badly as he could sleep without her in his arms, as much trouble had Felicity with falling asleep when Oliver wasn’t holding her.

“I hope Samantha will come around.”

It still felt unreal Felicity realized. And if it felt unreal to her, she had no idea how it must felt to Oliver. He had just learned that he had a son he hadn’t known about.

He had once told her how relieved he was that Samantha had lost the child because he just hadn’t been ready to have a child back then. But truth was that neither of them nor anyone else could know how Oliver would have reacted when he had ever gotten to meet his child. Maybe he would have turned his whole life upside down when he had first held his son in his arms. At least it was a possibility.

“I can be patient,” Felicity whispered in response, sighing deeply.

She actually felt a little sorry for Samantha. Felicity knew how it felt to be intimidated by Moira. That woman had known exactly what buttons to push. And, yes, Felicity had stood up to her and told Oliver that Malcolm Merlyn was Thea’s father despite everything, but she hadn’t had kids back then. If she had been a mother or a mother to be back then, Felicity didn’t know if she had brought up the same courage. Kids just changed everything.

But it didn’t matter anyway. All that mattered was that Oliver now had the chance to get to know William and build a relationship to him. That really was all that did and should matter.

“Thank you,” he sighed against her and pressed a kiss to her chest right over her heart.

“For what?” Felicity asked sleepily.

“For always supporting me.”

“Did I say any of my thoughts out loud?”

“I know you well enough to know what you think without needing to hear you say it,” Oliver replied, pressing another kiss to her heart. “So thank you.”

Felicity kissed the crown of Oliver’s head, whispering, “Always” into his hair.

And it wasn’t long before they fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know some of you have no trust in this storyline, but bear with me! We will have some angst chapters but not necessarily right now.  
> And I’ve never really disappointed with the outcome of an angst storyline, have I?


	119. Loving who you love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Four months back I received this ask (http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/136698553665/i-just-finished-reading-wait-first-things) and though I answered it immediately, I think it only counts as really answered now.

“Mommy, Tommy’s eating the phone!”

Felicity glanced at her son shortly. He was lying contently in the baby car seat she was carrying, and he indeed looked like he was eating the phone as his little lips were wrapped around the mouthpiece completely, and his jaw was moving that looked like he was chewing on the plastic. Tommy loved exploring everything with his mouth, and he could get quite dissatisfied when the things he wanted to explore were taken from him. So Felicity had just let him take the phone with him and use it as a pacifier when she had left the house. Sighing, Felicity switched the hand that carried the baby car seat when she felt her arm starting to hurt at the weight it had to carry.

She hadn’t been supposed to take the kids to Queen Industries. Actually she had taken a lot of work home with her, so she wouldn’t have to go to the company today at all because heading out with the kids wasn’t as easy as it sounded. It took like almost twenty minutes to help Emmy put on her shoes and get both of them into their jackets! But unfortunately she had noticed that she must have forgotten one of the contracts she really had to check as soon as possible on her desk when she had hastily left last night, so she would be home in time for Oliver to head to the airport without making him miss his flight.

It still felt a little weird that Oliver suddenly had a twelve-year-old son in Central City. And if it was feeling weird for her, Felicity couldn’t even imagine what it had to feel like for Oliver or William for that matter. They would certainly have a lot to figure out in the next weeks or months or whatever, but she kept her fingers crossed that Oliver would build a healthy relationship to his son despite the more than messy starting situation.

So Felicity knew that she would do whatever she could do to support Oliver in this, including doing whatever was necessary, so he could travel to Central City whenever he was able to spend some time with his son. Emmy had found it a little weird that her father had traveled away for another weekend without them once again when usually he invented a thousand reasons to not even stay away for one night, but Oliver had told her that he was going to bring her a present, and all worry had been forgotten. Felicity just hoped it would stay that way until William’s mother would be ready for Emmy to learn about her half-brother.

Running a few steps until she had caught up with her mother on the sidewalk, Emmy asked, “Mommy?”

“Yes, baby?” Felicity asked back, slowing down her pace, so Emmy didn’t have so much trouble keeping pace.

They had been forced to park a few streets away because in all the trouble Felicity had forgotten her key card for the subterranean garage, and the reception desk of course wasn’t staffed at a Saturday afternoon. At least it didn’t rain yet.

“How long will we stay in your office?”

“Not long, I promise,” Felicity answered. “Mommy just needs a few papers from her desk.”

“Why?”

“Because I forgot them there yesterday,” Felicity answered.

“Why?”

“Because I was in a hurry, so daddy wouldn’t miss his flight. Emmy, I am not in the mood for this game,” Felicity interrupted her daughter before she had the chance to ask another question, probably another why-question.

Emmy loved asking questions. She had always loved asking questions because she was so nosy and wanted to know everything, and Felicity had always encouraged her to be nosy and find out what she wanted to know, but she was so snowed in with work that she even had to work on a weekend, and with Oliver being in Central City it really was a lot she had to handle. It actually made her question even more how single-mothers managed to do that.

“We can play this game later again, okay?” Felicity asked when she saw Emmy lowering her gaze in disappointment.

“Okay!”

When they had finally arrived at Queen Industries, Felicity hastily unlocked the glass door and held it open for Emmy to go in first. She locked the door behind her again and took Emmy’s hand to get the little girl to come with her to the elevators instead of leaving her fingerprints everywhere on the glass walls.

“Come on, sweetie. The sooner we got to my office, the sooner we can go back home.”

“Can’t I wait here?”

“No,” Felicity answered with a sigh. “If one of the security guys-

“Don’t say ‘guy’,” Emmy repeated the words Oliver had told her often before.

“-would be here, yes, but since they seem to be patrolling, no.”

Emmy grumbled unhappily. So Felicity pushed the button for the elevator, put down Tommy and went down onto her knees.

“Hey,” she whispered, putting her hands to Emmy’s small hips and pulling her daughter right in front of her. Slowly the young girl lifted her gaze from the floor and looked at her mom. “I know that I am a little annoyed today. I just have a lot of work to do.”

Emmy nodded, playing with Felicity’s necklace. “I can help working.”

Felicity chuckled, kissing her daughter’s cheek. “How about we get the papers, go home, mommy works until dinner, and then we eat pizza and ice cream and watch all the great Disney movies?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed happily, all the frustration of before forgotten when she leaned forward and kissed Felicity. “Love you, mommy.”

“I love you, too, sweetie.”

Just when the elevator arrived in front of them, Felicity got up and turned around to get into it and upstairs to her office as soon as possible. She was already about to take the first step when-

“Felicity, what are you doing here? On a Saturday? With your family?”

Felicity cocked her head, looking at her favorite employee Curtis Holt. In the little time she had had to work with him yet, he had proved himself to be one of the best people she had ever worked with, and that meant a lot coming from her because Felicity was not one to complement others easily when it was about working with her babies, the inhuman ones.

“I could ask you the same question, right?” Felicity asked back, reaching out her hand for the man next to Curtis. “Hi, Felicity Queen.”

“Paul Holt, I am Curtis’ husband.”

“Oh, I know. I have seen pictures of you. He’s a hottie, Curtis,” Felicity said to her employee and bit down on her bottom lip at the way the two men looked at her. Hastily she added, “Which I realize is completely inappropriate to say…”

She laughed a little nervously, feeling herself blush. Why couldn’t her brain-to-mouth-filter work for once? No, of course she had to say something like that.

“Hi, Paul Holt. I’m Emmeline Queen,” Emmy said into the silence, holding out her hand for Paul.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Emmeline Queen,” Paul said with a chuckle. “Did you meet my husband Curtis yet?”

“No,” Emmy replied, shaking her head so her little curls danced all around her cute face. She held out her hand for the other man now, and Curtis shook it with a smile on his lips. “Hi, Curtis.”

“Hi, Emmeline. It is really nice to meet you.”

Felicity watched Emmy looking from Curtis to Paul and back again. A little frown built between her eyebrows, telling that she was concentrating on a thought. For a short moment she puckered her lips before she asked Curtis, “You’re Paul’s husband?”

Oh God!

They had talked to Emmy about it, as much as you could talk to a girl that had just turned three years old about something like this, but Emmy had never met a gay or lesbian couple before. And since Felicity knew her daughter, she felt like after this conversation she should maybe plan to transfer Curtis to the subsidiary in Moscow or something similar far away because this would surely end embarrassingly, but then again she didn’t want to send Curtis away. She loved working with him.

“Yes, I am,” Curtis replied.

He crouched down in front of Emmeline, so their eyes were on the same level. It wasn’t much, but Felicity immediately got the feeling that he was good with kids, and considering the way Paul looked at his husband while he was interacting with the little girl, she didn’t seem to be the only one realizing this.

“So you love each other?” Emmy asked.

“Very much,” Curtis replied, looking at his husband with a loving gaze.

“You look almost the same way daddy looks when he is watching mommy,” Emmy whispered with an amused smile. “Thea says daddy’s eyes form to hearts when he looks at mommy.”

The words made the adults around her chuckle, and even Tommy joined into it, abandoning the phone for a short moment.

“Do you have babies?” Emmy asked.

“No, we don’t. We only married last year.”

“But do you want to have babies?”

“Emmy,” Felicity said gently, shaking her head slightly when her daughter was looking at her.

“Am I too nosy again?” she asked Curtis, her facial expression darkening.

“It’s okay,” Curtis assured. “Paul and I want to have babies one day, yes.”

Emmy nodded slowly. “Are you going to grow it in your tummy?”

“Uhm…” Curtis made, looking at Felicity for help.

Hastily she crouched down behind her daughter and explained, “Remember when daddy and I told you that only women can grow babies in their tummies?”

“But Curtis and Paul want a baby, mommy,” Emmy said, her eyes widening. “How do they get one?”

“Well, sometimes a baby’s mommy and daddy go to heaven very early, so they get new parents. Other times parents ask a different couple to take their child home because they can’t take it home with them. And sometimes there are women who grow a baby in their tummy, so couples who can’t have a baby can raise them.”

“That’s nice of them,” Emmy said before she looked back at Curtis again. “Do you have a woman to grow your baby in her tummy?”

“Not yet,” Curtis said. “Paul and I want to wait a little longer before having a baby.”

Emmy nodded, puckering her lips while she was thinking concentrated again. “Mommy can’t grow your baby in her tummy. She only grows daddy’s babies.”

“Very true,” Felicity said with a nod.

“Maybe Laurel can help?” Emmy asked Felicity. “She can grow the baby in her tummy.”

Felicity chuckled, kissing her daughter’s head. “I think you should leave it up to Curtis and Paul to find a way to have a baby.”

“Can I ask Laurel when we see her next time?”

Felicity didn’t answer. She would just hope that Emmeline would forget everything about it before they met Laurel the next time because that conversation would be just too weird.

“Mommy?” Emmy asked, not wanting to let go.

Luckily, Tommy released a high-pitched cry in that moment, sparing Felicity the need to answer.

“Oh, I think your brother needs to go home,” she said with a look down to Tommy instead. She pressed a few buttons on the phone, and Tommy fell silent at the beeping sounds, taking the phone from his mother and starting to chew on the plastic again.

“Yeah, Paul and I should leave, too. I just wanted to check an idea for a project I am working on, and-“

“He’s a workaholic,” Paul explained with a chuckle, shooting Curtis a teasing gaze when he got up from his crouching position.

“You love it,” Curtis just replied.

“Now you need to kiss!”

“Emmy!” Felicity exclaimed. “You can’t-“

But she interrupted herself when she saw Curtis leaning forward and pecking his husband’s lips shortly. Emmy watched closely with a satisfied smile playing on her lips.

“It was nice meeting you, Emmeline,” Curtis then said. He turned around and held out his hand for her to shake which she did eagerly, followed by Paul’s hand.

“I talk to Laurel about the baby,” she promised. “It’s gonna be a lucky baby with two daddies. Right, mommy?”

“Right,” Felicity whispered.

Was it possible to be even prouder of her daughter? Felicity doubted it, but she had thought it wouldn’t be possible to love her more before they had run into Curtis and Paul, and Emmy had proved her wrong. There were surely going to come more opportunities for Emmeline to prove her mother wrong about it again.

“Mommy, come on! We gotta go, so Tommy gets home,” Emmy said, tugging at her mother’s hand when Curtis and Paul had left and the doors to the elevator had opened again.

But Felicity just kneeled down onto the floor and pulled Emmeline right in front of her, kissing the little girl’s cheeks and making her giggle about it.

“Mommy, what’re you doing?”

“Kissing you,” Felicity said between kisses, “because you are just the sweetest girl in the world.”

“I am!”

“Yes, you are,” Felicity affirmed. She kissed her daughter’s cheek one last time before she pulled back slightly. “You were very nice to Curtis and Paul.”

“They’re nice,” Emmy said. “And they love each other. That’s nice, too.”

“I am very happy that you see it that way.”

“Daddy says everyone should love who they love. So a man can love a man. A woman can love a woman.”

Felicity smiled. “How about we just go home, mommy skips work, and we start cuddling on the couch and watching movies already?”

“Yes!”

“Then come on, let’s go,” Felicity suggested, lifting Tommy’s car seat from the floor and nodding towards the door, but Emmy had already run ahead impatiently.


	120. Home

When the door clicked shut behind her, Felicity leaned back against the cool door for a short moment, and with a deep sigh of exhaustion she closed her eyes.

It had been weeks of long workdays with little time to relax, and with only one month away for her to meet with the CEO of Wayne Enterprise and present the idea for a joint project of their companies, she didn’t see her busy schedule easing off anytime soon. That was especially the case given that it was her first big project since she had taken over the head of the company a few months ago. But anyway Felicity was sure that at the end it really would be worth the effort.

Yawning, she started strolling towards the living room, slipping off her shoes and carelessly dropping her jacket to the floor on her way.

“Hey, are you welcoming mommy home?” Felicity asked when Tommy rolled out of the living room and right towards her.

She lifted him from the floor and cradled him to her chest. She hadn’t even had time to wait with leaving for work until he had woken up this morning, and he had been deeply asleep when she had come home from work yesterday. She really had missed him. So seeing her baby boy made her feel better immediately, she realized when kissing his cheek. The little boy giggled in delight, slowly making all the stress fell off his mother.

“Where did you leave daddy and Emmy, hm?” Felicity asked.

Slowly she stepped into the living room with Tommy sitting on her hip, snuggled up to her side. His head rested on her shoulder while his hand was lazily playing with her hair that was up in her usual high ponytail.

Felicity had just taken two steps into the living room when she stopped, smiling joyfully at what she saw in front of her. Oliver was lying with his stomach down on the hardwood floor, his legs outstretched and his arms resting next to his head. His eyes were closed, and a peaceful smile was playing on his lips as he was sleeping soundly. Emmy was lying on Oliver’s back with her right hand slowly stroking up and down Oliver’s ribs. While her eyes were just as closed as Oliver’s she obviously wasn’t sleeping.

Cursing mentally, Felicity realized that she had put her phone to the small table next to the front door. Otherwise she could take a photo of the scene in front of her. It would probably soon turn into her new favorite photo of Oliver and Emmeline. Well, at least she would carry the picture in her mind for the rest of her life.

“Did you tire our two lovelies out?” Felicity asked Tommy, rocking him up and down on her hip.

She had only spoken in a whisper, so she wouldn’t wake Oliver, but it had been enough to call Emmy’s attention on them. The little girl’s eyes opened, and with a happy screech she jumped up from her father’s back and ran towards her mother.

“Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” she shouted excitedly, tightly wrapping her arms around her mother’s legs and pressing her face to her thighs.

“Pssst, daddy’s sleeping,” Felicity whispered, but a short gaze to Oliver was enough to let her know that it was too late already. His eyes were opened, no sign of tiredness or whatever else left there.

“Daddy’s not sleeping anymore,” he said with a chuckle, getting up from the floor and walking over towards them. He kissed Felicity’s temple shortly, brushing his hand over their daughter’s hair. Quietly he whispered, “I am glad you’re back home.”

“So am I,” Felicity replied, leaning her head against his shoulder tiredly for a moment.

This was her favorite part of coming home. Having her family all around her and feeling all the exhaustion falling off of her really was what made her day.

“Emmy, do you want to play with Tommy here for as long as mommy and daddy prepare dinner?”

Emmy nodded eagerly, reaching out her arms to take Tommy. Felicity carefully placed Tommy in his sister’s arms and helped her setting him down onto the floor.

“You okay?” Felicity asked when they were alone in the kitchen, cocking her head at him.

“Sure,” Oliver answered a little too quickly, turning around to her and wrapping his arms around her waist loosely. He pecked her lips shortly before pulling back enough again to watch her. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because it’s not that likely for you to fall asleep on the floor in the middle of the day,” Felicity explained.

Oliver smiled, leaning down and kissing her once more. Felicity thought it was only going to be another peck to her lips, but then he stepped closer, deepening the kiss and slipping his tongue into her mouth. His hands moved from the middle of her back to her hips, swaying them slightly like they were dancing to music only he could hear. When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against Felicity’s, making her sigh contently.

“What was that for?” she whispered, licking her lips to savor his taste on her tongue.

“For giving me a home that I feel so safe in that I can fall asleep on the floor in the middle of the day,” Oliver replied with a smile that stole her breath away and made her heartbeat fasten. “I told you that the first night after I came back from the island, I was sleeping on the floor, and I had a nightmare, and when my mother tried to wake me, I… attacked her.”

Felicity nodded, moving her hands up and down Oliver’s forearms in silent comfort while he was talking because she knew that it wasn’t easy for him to admit this. The incident with his mother in his first night back from the island had been one of the first things he had told her when they had gotten together. He had been scared of attacking her in his sleep, so he had spent hours lying awake and fighting sleep to make sure he wouldn’t turn into a threat for her life. Some nights he had dozed off, but it had never been for long. It hadn’t been until she had told him that she trusted him, and she had offered to stay awake a whole night to let him sleep in her arms that he had finally been able to push his fears back and sleep at her side.

“And now I can fall asleep peacefully in the middle of the day with the kids being right around me and snuggling up to me, and I am not scared that I am going to hurt them,” Oliver added after a short while. He kissed the tip of her nose before leaning back and smiling at her once more. “And that is all thanks to you.”

“That’s sweet,” Felicity answered, “though I wish that you would not fall asleep when Tommy is crawling around.”

Oliver chuckled. “Sorry, I was just exhausted.”

Felicity cocked her head, frowning slightly. “Did something happen?”

“It’s-“ Oliver started, but stopped when Felicity perked her eyebrow doubtingly, knowing exactly that he was about to wave it off. So he cleared his throat, and added, “-something with William.”

It’s only been three weeks since they had found out that Oliver had a twelve-year-old son, and they were still progressing these news, and still William had already become a part of their life. Well, at least he had become a part of Oliver’s life since Felicity hadn’t met him yet, but everything that concerned Oliver kind of affected her too, so William had become a part of both of their life.

“Tell me,” she asked gently, smiling encouragingly.

“He called earlier today, and I think I disappointed him for the first time,” Oliver whispered, lowering his gaze to the pendant of Felicity’s necklace, an arrowhead that he had given to her when he had proposed a second wedding to her after she had recovered from the prenatal depression during her pregnancy with Tommy. The names of the two of them and their children were engraved in Cyrillic letters. She always wore it. It was her talisman, and Oliver loved seeing it on her. It was like seeing the wedding band on her hand, only that the pendant was so much closer to her heart.

Felicity patiently waited for Oliver to say something more, and tell her what exactly had happened, and only when he made no other attempt to say anything else, Felicity asked, “What happened?”

“I can’t go to the play of his drama class,” Oliver answered with a sigh.

Felicity frowned. Oliver had been so excited when William had asked him to come there. Samantha hadn’t suggested it, and neither had Oliver. It had been completely William’s doing, and that had meant so much for Oliver. Given the messy starting position for their relationship, it had felt like a good sign for him that William had invited him, especially after so little time.

“I thought you had already booked a flight?”

“I did, but they had to reschedule the date for the play because the teacher is sick or whatever. Anyway, now it’s on March 25.”

“So?” Felicity asked.

Oliver frowned slightly. “It’s our wedding anniversary in case you forgot.”

“Oh, I didn’t forget,” Felicity just answered, watching Oliver frown at her with a lack of understanding for how she could not see that as a problem, so she leaned a little closer to him, and explained, “Look, I know how much it means to you to get to know your son and have a good relationship to him. William invited you to the play, so you really have to go there.”

“It’s our wedding anniversary,” Oliver reminded her once more.

“Yes, but we can still celebrate that later.”

“But-“

“Oliver, I am an adult,” she interrupted him, tightening her arms around his middle. “I know that you want to celebrate our anniversary, and I also know that you want to see William for his play. Unless we find a way to rip you in two parts, you can’t do both, and you have to make a decision.”

“I don’t want to make that decision,” Oliver said, looking at her sadly. “Either I disappoint him, or I disappoint you.”

“You’re not disappointing me. As someone who grew up without a dad, I know how it feels when he is not there for things like the play of the drama class. My dad missed all of that because he didn’t care enough. But you care, and you shouldn’t miss it because it surely wouldn’t help William to trust you.”

Oliver released a deep breath. “I don’t know, Felicity. It feels like I have to choose between you and William, and-”

“And I know that that would be an impossible decision, so I am telling you to go see your son. Oliver, it really doesn’t matter to me if we celebrate our wedding anniversary the exact right day or not. I love you; you love me. We have a great life with two perfect children and everything else one could possibly have. And that is a reason to celebrate every day and not only for our anniversary.”

Oliver scrunched his nose slightly before he said, “It still feels wrong.”

“But it’s the right thing to do.”

“Still not sure of that.”

“I know, but… I am sure of it. You go to Central City, and we celebrate our wedding anniversary later,” she stated. “Without the anniversary sex because that is only for March 25.”

Though her voice let no doubt that she was only teasing him, Oliver lowered his gaze with an uncomfortable expression on his face. So Felicity boxed him into the side playfully.

“Hey, you are supposed to tease back when I am teasing you.”

But Oliver didn’t smile. He just looked at her closely. His fingertips moved under the hem of her top, slowly stroking over the skin of her back.

“You really have to go through a lot with me, don’t you?”

“It’s not that much, and even if it was, you’re worth it,” Felicity replied.

“You’re sure?”

Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck and jumped up at him, so her legs were wrapping around his hips. Immediately Oliver’s hands moved lower from her back to her butt, squeezing teasingly.

“I am sure,” Felicity answered, kissing him gently before pulling back and smiling at him, “because just like I give you a home that makes you feel so safe that you can fall asleep on the floor in the middle of the day, you’re giving me a home that I love returning to. That is something I didn’t really have before you.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment before he took in a deep breath. “So you really are sure that I should go?”

Felicity answered with a kiss to his lips, reassuring him that she was indeed sure.


	121. Thank you

Felicity closed her eyes, and with a deep sigh she leaned back under the stream of hot water, letting it hail down on her skin. After all the work of the last weeks and the knowledge of how much work was still to come in the next weeks until her meeting with the CEO of Wayne Enterprise, a long shower like this was exactly what she needed.

Just like the weekend with the kids had been exactly what she had needed. Having them all for herself and not having to share their attention with anyone, even if it was Oliver, sometimes just felt so great. It might be a little selfish, but just sometimes she loved spending time with just Emmy and Tommy. After all Oliver had their attention all for himself most of the week while she was working anyway.

But of course that didn’t mean that she hadn’t missed Oliver while he had been in Central City to visit William and watch the play of his drama class! She had missed him like crazy because she always missed him when they were apart, but she was adult enough to swallow down her longing. After all they had only been apart for a few days, and it had been for a good reason.

After the play Oliver had called her to tell her everything about it. And he had thanked her like a thousand times for convincing him to go despite the play being at the day of their wedding anniversary. He wouldn’t have wanted to miss the happy and proud smile on William’s face when he had come to Oliver after the play to ask if he had enjoyed it, and Oliver had told him how much he had loved every minute of it. Kids, Felicity remembered thinking when Oliver had told her about it, just depended so much on their parents’ reactions.

Anyway, Oliver should get home in the next two hours, and Felicity had already taken Emmy and Tommy to Thea, so they could properly celebrate their anniversary once-

Her thoughts came to a sudden stop when two arms wrapped around her from behind, pulling her towards what most people would think was a hard wall but as Felicity knew was just her very well-trained and hence perfectly muscular husband.

“Hi,” she whispered, putting her hands on his forearms and snuggling back against his chest.

The buttons of the dress shirt he was still wearing though he was standing right under the stream of hot water pressed into her back, but Felicity didn’t mind. She was distracted by the bulge in Oliver’s pants that pressed against her butt and made a low moan escape her lips anyway.

“Hi,” Oliver whispered huskily.

He ducked his head to press his lips to the side of her neck. They found her pulse point immediately, caressing the soft spot before opening to give his tongue the same chance. Felicity angled her head, giving Oliver an even better access to her neck. Meanwhile Oliver’s arms loosened around her middle, and his hands started moving over her front; his left took an upward path over her ribs to her left breast, moving his palm over her nipple until it hardened and his thumb started flicking it, while his right hand moved downwards, dipping into her belly button before lowering even more without touching her most sensitive parts.

“God,” Felicity whispered, arching her back to press herself closer to Oliver and his hands. Her own hands moved down the side of his body behind her to his hips where she let them move down to his butt, pulling him closer and making his hardened, clothes covered erection press into her behind more firmly. She hummed contently and let her head roll back on his shoulder when Oliver’s lips abandoned the spot on her neck and moved upward over her jaw to her cheek and finally the corner of her mouth.

Felicity turned her head, feeling her heart skip a beat at the way Oliver looked at her. It seemed ridiculous! They’ve been married for four years now, together for like five. They had had sex so often with two perfect kids as a proof. And still Oliver looked at her the same way he had looked at her during their first night together. And still it took Felicity’s breath away every time.

Their lips brushed against the other’s without meeting in a real kiss, once and then once more. Felicity could feel Oliver smile against her lips though she couldn’t see it as her eyes had closed, making the anticipation of the kiss even more exciting. When the tingling in her body, the longing to feel his lips on hers, grew unbearable Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes, pressing her lips to his and at the same time making his fingers move even lower and between her wet folds.

They moaned in unison, opening their lips to each other, so their tongues could meet in a long memorized dance. Oliver’s fingers kept playing with her nipple and the sensitive, wet flesh at her entrance. His hips thrust against her butt, making her press against his fingers more firmly with every time.

Felicity felt her pleasure increasing quickly. Her legs started trembling, barely holding her anymore, so she just leaned back against Oliver and trusted him to carry her weight like she knew he would. And when Oliver’s thumb flicked her clit, she leaned her head back and locked eyes with him just in time before her orgasm ripped through her, making her already wobbly knees give in. If it hadn’t been for Oliver’s strong arms wrapping around her and securing her to his body, she would have fallen to the floor.

She could hear her wild heartbeat in her ear, could feel Oliver’s stubble scratching her skin where his lips kissed her shoulder. But it took a few more minutes that they just stood cuddled under the stream of water in the shower before she had enough feeling in her body again for her feet to carry her body and for her body to move.

Immediately Felicity turned in Oliver’s arms, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her lips to his in an urgent kiss. She pressed herself as close to him as possible, enjoying the way his water-soaked clothes rubbed against her skin, making a new wave of pleasure grow inside of her quickly since she was still very sensitive from the orgasm she had just had.

“Thank you,” Oliver said as soon as their lips parted.

“Oh, I feel like I should thank you,” Felicity replied with a chuckle.

Oliver pecked her lips shortly. “Thank you for convincing me to go to Central City and taking all the guilt from me for not being here for our anniversary.”

“You don’t have to thank me for that,” Felicity explained.

“Yes, I do,” Oliver objected.

“In that case I have to thank you for the way you thank me,” Felicity replied. She brushed her lips against his shortly, tightening her arms around his neck. “And I don’t mean the words.”

“Oh, really?” Oliver asked, a wide smirk spreading on his lips.

Felicity nodded, smirking back at him. “But it would be even better if you were naked and, you know, inside of me.”

“That can be arranged,” Oliver almost growled and took two steps forward, pressing Felicity with her back against the cold tiles of the shower.

She arched into him in response, trying to get away from the coolness. A moan escaped her lips as the movement made her body press against Oliver’s groin. Tightening her arms around his neck, Felicity jumped up and wrapped her legs around Oliver’s hips, holding onto him for dear life.

When Oliver pressed her closer to the wall, caging her in while his lips attacked her neck, she moved her hands from his back and over his shoulders to the front of his chest. With quick movements she started unbuttoning his water-soaked dress shirt, pulled it out from the waistband of her pants and hastily moved it off his shoulders. The fabric fell to the floor of the shower with a loud sound.

Felicity pressed herself even closer to Oliver. Her hands moved back to his back, so her nails could scratch the scarred skin there, enjoying how it felt beneath her fingertips. She had memorized his body a long time ago, knew every scar, every tattoo; knew how it looked and how it felt.

Oliver’s lips moved higher on her neck and behind her ear, sucking at the one spot that made her toes curl. He loved that spot right behind and slightly under her ear, just like she loved when he kissed that spot. His hips thrust against hers, making the fabric of his pants rub perfectly against her clit. It didn’t take long until Felicity felt her pleasure increasing again.

But she didn’t want to come without him.

She put her feet back to the floor and pushed his hips away a little, so she could unbuckle his belt, unbutton his pants and push them down over his hips and butt until they pooled around his ankles on the floor. She let his boxers follow quickly, leaving him just as naked as she was already.

When Felicity gripped his hardened length, Oliver quickly pulled his hands away from where they had been resting on Felicity’s butt and slammed them to the cold tiles right next to her head like he needed that hold for balance. His head sank to her shoulder, his forehead resting there while his hips thrust into her hand slowly.

Felicity loved having him at her mercy like that, and she loved having him breathe out her name in that husky whisper that made her moan like the touch of his hand between her folds would have. She moved her hand up and down his length in rhythmic strokes, enjoying how she felt him grow even harder with her caress.

“Felicity.”

The growl of her name made her hum contently as a warm shiver ran down the length of her spine. She squeezed his length, feeling Oliver’s breath hitch while he thrust into her hand a little more sharply.

“You have to stop,” he said, trying to get her hand to move away from his cock, but she just held onto it more firmly, making Oliver’s hand move around wildly until it found the top edge of the shower stall to hold onto. “This is going to end too quickly.”

“What? Is your stamina subsiding, Mr. Queen?” Felicity asked in a teasing voice that she was barely able to keep from breaking since Oliver’s body pressed against hers made his chest rub over her nipples deliciously.

“That would be bad, wouldn’t it?” Oliver asked between clenched jaws though Felicity didn’t miss how his voice had that teasing tone in it.

“Well, as your sugar mama I have no more use for you without your stamina,” Felicity whispered, squeezing Oliver’s cock particularly firmly. “You would have to find new ways to, you know, make me happy.”

“I love when you refer to yourself as my sugar mama,” Oliver growled, lifting his head from her shoulder and resting his forehead against hers.

“Is that one of those fantasies on that little list of sexual things you would like to do with me?” Felicity asked, remembering all too clearly how he had accidentally told her that he had a list in his head that held all the sexual fantasies he would love to play out with her. She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since she had learned about it.  Unfortunately Oliver didn’t want to tell her what was on that list, no matter how much she had begged him to. “Because, you know, I would always be in for playing out whatever fantasies you-“

“Oh, I don’t need a fantasy for that,” Oliver replied, lifting Felicity from the floor with his hands behind her knees, so her legs wrapped back around his hips like they had before and his erection slid between her wet folds without entering her, making a content sigh escape her lips. “I do have a sugar mama, and I can pleasure her whenever I want to, no fantasy needed.”

“I think as your sugar mama I am saying when I get to be pleasure and- oooh!”

Her words ended in a long moan when Oliver thrust into her in one stroke that buried him deep in her tight, wet core. Oliver’s hips stilled, and Felicity tightened her legs around his hips, locking eyes with him. For a long moment they stayed like that, just looking at each other without talking or moving.

Oliver’s hands were still on her butt, angling her hips to make him enter her as deep as possible. His chest pressed against hers. Their hearts beat in perfect harmony. Oliver’s blue eyes were darker than usually, hungry for her. The intensity of his gaze made a tingle spread from the pit of her stomach.

They move at the same time, so their lips met half-way in a passionate kiss. Oliver pulled out slightly before thrusting back in. His skin rubbed against her clit, making Felicity moan into his mouth and hence giving Oliver the chance to slip his tongue into her mouth, massaging hers with his. Felicity’s hands stroked over his back, again scratching his scars like she knew he liked.

It didn’t take long until their movements became much faster. The splashing sound of the water mixed with the slapping sound of skin hitting against skin with each of Oliver’s firm thrusts.

Felicity felt her pleasure increasing quickly. When her breaths became shorter and her lungs felt like they were on fire, she threw her head back. She moaned in lust as much as in pain since the movement made her head hit the wall behind her.

“Are you-“

“Yes,” Felicity hastily interrupted Oliver’s worried question before he got the chance to really ask and she pressed her heels into his butt, pulling him back inside of her. “Keep going.”

Oliver indeed kept going. His thrusts increased pace once more, and when Oliver angled her hips, he hit the sweet spot inside of her that made her moan every time. Felicity’s legs tightened around Oliver’s hips once more, so did her arms around his neck. Oliver’s thrusts grew even faster and firmer when his pleasure increased, and Felicity could see him clench his jaws tightly, telling her that he was close.

So was she. She was so close, right on the edge. But she didn’t want to let go.

Shower sex with Oliver was the best way to start her day. She loved how he still snuck into the shower with her on an average weekday when he knew that she didn’t have any important meetings early in the morning. It was like a morning ritual, welcoming the day by making love under the stream of hot water. So she wanted to hold onto this moment as long as possible.

Only when she knew that she couldn’t take it any longer, Felicity leaned forward, almost bumping her nose against Oliver’s, before she whispered his name with that one hoarse voice she knew he loved hearing.

“Oliver.”

It was enough for him to fall over the edge with her. They groaned in unison, breathing the same air. Their hearts were beating rapidly. Their eyes never left each other’s face though the involuntary spasms and the feeling of Oliver twitching inside of her almost made her squeeze her eyes shut.

“God,” Felicity whispered with a long exhale when she had come down from the high of pleasure. She leaned her head back against the cold tiles, closing her eyes for a short moment and just breathe in and out deeply.

“You okay?” Oliver asked with half of a chuckle and half of a sigh, resting his head on her shoulder and snuggling his stubble against the top of her chest, scratching her skin.

“More than okay.”

Felicity moved her right hand into Oliver’s hair. Her nails scratched his scalp slightly, making him hum contently.

They stayed like this for awhile, just enjoying being so close to the other without saying anything. They didn’t need to. They had never needed to talk much. Stolen looks and gentle touches had been enough for them to communicate. It had been like that even long before they had been together.

“Can you promise me something?” Felicity finally asked.

“Everything,” Oliver answered and lifted his head from her shoulder, looking at her. “I’d promise you everything, and it’s not only because of our little tradition to make the other promise something during our anniversary. I’d just promised you everything.”

Felicity leaned forward, brushing her lips against Oliver’s in a gentle kiss.

“Promise me to come into the shower for morning sex even in ten years.”

“I promise to come into the shower for morning sex even in fifty years.”

Felicity chuckled. “That’s going to be awkward.”

“Why? Just envision me being all muscular and hot, still wanting you the same way I do know, just with a few more wrinkles.”

Again Felicity chuckled, resting her forehead against Oliver’s for a short moment. “You and I in fifty years – I like that thought.”

“So do I,” Oliver replied with a quiet sigh before he pulled back enough to look at her once more.

“Can you promise me something, too?”

Felicity nodded. “Sure.”

“Please promise me never to get kidnapped and be somewhere I don’t know where or whether it’s safe for so long again, please.”

Felicity opened her eyes to look at Oliver whose eyes were squeezed shut. His face showed the same pain his voice had held.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered, putting her hand to his cheek and gently stroking her thumb over his cheekbone until he opened his eyes and looked at her with a pained expression. “You know I can’t promise you that.”

“But I need that promise. Please.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. Promising Oliver something like this would be dangerous. She knew and he knew that she wouldn’t be able to keep this promise because what had happened to them earlier this year, when Cupid and Foster had kidnapped her and the kids, could happen again. Felicity didn’t like the thought, but she knew that it was true. It _could_ happen again. So promising this no matter whether or not Oliver knew as well as she did that she didn’t have much influence on it was just wrong.

“I can’t promise you that. But what I _can_ promise you is that I’ll always fight like hell to stay here, and that in the worst case no matter who kidnapped me or where I am I will always fight to come back to you.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, not saying anything. Felicity could feel his heartbeat against her chest, quick and strong. It took awhile, but finally Oliver breathed out with a sigh, relaxing against her.

“Thank you,” he whispered, resting his forehead against hers. “Thank you.”

“Always,” Felicity whispered back, massaging the tense muscle in the back of his neck with her hand in a hope that it would make him feel better.

It wasn’t long until Oliver started rocking his hips against hers, and Felicity could feel him growing hard inside of her again. Moaning, she bit down on her bottom lip, and Oliver angled her hips, thrusting in deeper.

“I love the way you say thank you,” Felicity whispered before pressing her lips to his in another searing kiss, letting herself be thanked all over again.


	122. Family gallery

Even the loud sounds of the action movie that was airing on TV right now seemed unable to make the silence in the hotel room any less painful.

Felicity couldn’t remember how often she had prayed for a little more silence in the last five weeks. She had worked long hours in the office, running around from one division to the other and the next one and back to the first again almost non-stop, and all the time questions over questions of her employees and the media and whoever else had been hailing down on her. It had been so bad that even at home there had still been a buzzing of all those voices in her head which hadn’t had bearing the kids’ noises any easier. She had actually found herself biting her tongue to stop herself from yelling at the kids rather often.

Now that she was all alone in this room, though, Felicity missed hearing Emmy babble about her day and Tommy giggle about Oliver making silly faces at him. She missed the sounds of her family that told her that she wasn’t alone.

Alone. That was how she felt with only the sounds of the TV. Alone.

Felicity reached out her hand for her phone, checking the time. It was way too late to call home again. Tommy had to be already in bed sleeping, and Oliver was probably just about to read Emmy the last sentences of her bedtime story. If Felicity called home now, both kids would be wide awake again.

The last time when she had been away from home for a night, apart from having been taken from her psychotic stalker or being in the hospital after giving birth to Tommy, had been when Emmy had had chickenpox, and Felicity had needed to stay away to not get infected. She had stayed at Thea’s and Roy’s place for the time being which had actually been several weeks. Despite Thea’s tries to lighten her mood, being away from her family had been hard then. She had missed Emmy and Oliver like crazy. Tommy in her bump had been her silver lining, giving her a feeling of home and family.

With a deep sigh Felicity rolled herself onto her back, lifted her phone over her face and started flipping through the photos there. Luckily, she always carried her little gallery of family moments with her. Usually she needed the photos to get her through a busy day of work when there was no time to call home after lunch time to talk to her loved ones. She then flipped through her gallery of family pictures, often deciding on looking at one picture that she liked particularly much that day for several minutes and immediately felt closer to them.

But tonight it seemed like the photos weren’t enough. She looked the photos of Tommy and Emmy that Oliver had sent her when she had been at work the last weeks or months, but none of them gave her the feeling of home they usually offered. Even the cuddle photo of the four of them that they had taken during Oliver’s recovery after he had been shot didn’t offer any comfort, and that meant a lot because when no other photo had helped that one always had.

Felicity kept flipping through the photos unenthusiastically, not feeling like any of the photos would help making her miss her home and her family less. But then a smile formed on her lips at seeing a photo she had almost forgotten about completely.

The photo showed a slightly sweating Oliver, holding baby Tommy in his arms and looking into the camera with what most people would call an unreadable expression. For Felicity it was easy to see that it was pride in his face. Oliver might have tried to hide it, but Felicity could still see it so clearly. It had been Tommy’s first visit in the Arrow cave, and Oliver had immediately taken their son from Felicity’s arm and showed him every edge of the cave, just like he had done with Emmy years before.

Sweaty Oliver holding one of their kids in his arms of course had to make her smile. Sweaty Oliver alone would have probably been enough, but sweaty Oliver with his proud daddy smile was even better.

And yet Felicity should actually be angry at him. Oliver was the very reason why she was lying here all alone in the hotel room and missing her family after all.

Sighing, Felicity put her phone away and stared at the ceiling again.

She had wanted to take the kids with her. Everything had been planned out perfectly. She had booked the company’s jet. She had booked a spacious hotel suite. She had scheduled her appointments in a way that would have allowed her to spend enough time with the kids and still do her job. Her mom would have even taken a few days off from work for when Felicity had to work. It had been awhile since she had last had visited them in Starling, so Felicity coming to Las Vegas and bringing the kids had been perfect for all of them.

Or at least for everyone but Oliver because when Felicity had told him about her plans, he had actually started laughing and only stopped when she had frowned at him. He had asked her if she was serious and only when she had said that of course she was, he had cleared his throat and become serious himself. Then he had spoken at length about how she couldn’t take the kids with her because there was absolutely no need for it. When he had been the working parent, he had gone on business trips alone, leaving the kids with her. He hadn’t liked it, but that was the deal with them – one parent worked an actual job that made money, and the other parent took care of the kids fulltime. And putting the kids or at least little Tommy through all the trouble with the flights for only two nights would have been ridiculous anyway, he had said.

So Felicity really should be angry with him.

Of course he had pointed out that he knew how she felt because he had hated going on business trips and being apart from them too when the roles had been reverted, but he had gotten through it, and at the end he had known that it had better for the kids to not take them.

He was probably right, especially given that he had used a lot of the words she had said to him back when he had to go to his first business trips without her.

Still Felicity didn’t have to like it.

Taking the pillow from the other side of the bed and holding it close to her stomach, Felicity turned onto her side and rolled herself together like a fetus. She really hated being away from home. She couldn’t wait to be back and-

A quiet knock at the door pulled her out of her thoughts. Felicity considered just turning onto her other side and ignoring it given that she didn’t expect anyone, especially not that late, but then again maybe whoever was waiting for her outside would distract her from how terribly she missed her home and her family.

She strolled towards the door slowly, almost rolling her eyes when whoever was waiting on the other side of the door knocked again impatiently. Why did people always think that as soon as there was a knock at the door, she had to jump up and run to the door like she had just waited for it? Almost reminded her a little of-

Felicity barely dared to trust her eyes when she opened the door.

“Oliver.”

She had missed him for hours, and now here he was, standing right in front of the door to her hotel room and smiling at her. He carried sleeping Tommy in the car seat in his right hand, and held an equally sleeping Emmy against his chest with his left arm. Her head rested on his shoulder, and she was snoring softly against the side of his neck.

“Hey,” he whispered, his smile growing even wider. “Mind if we come in?”

“No, of course not,” Felicity said, hastily stepping away and letting Oliver and the kids in.

Felicity still couldn’t believed it, and she was sure that she was staring at him, watching his every move almost like she was afraid that he was going to disappear again.

“What are you doing here?” she asked in a whisper, stepping closer to where Oliver was putting the kids to the middle of the bed and adjusting the blanket over them. “Did something happen?”

“Nothing happened,” Oliver replied, shortly kissing both the kids on the foreheads before turning around to Felicity. He approached her slowly, wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close until her chest was pressed right against his. “I just missed you.”

Oliver bent down and touched her lips with his gently. Immediately she opened up to him, opening her lips and pushing herself even closer to him, so he could deepen the kiss. His tongue slipped into her mouth shortly, massaging her tongue with his.

“You’re sure it’s just that?” she asked when their lips parted and their forehead rested against each other’s.

Oliver chuckled, pulling back enough to be able to look at her. “Why should there be something else?”

Felicity narrowed her eyes slightly and eyed her husband up closely. “I don’t know. It’s just that you have been so against me taking the kids here for two days that… I don’t know… Are you sure nothing else happened?”

Again Oliver chuckled. He pecked her lips and then asked, “Do you know why I was so against you taking the kids with you?”

“Because the stress wasn’t good for them?”

“Nope,” Oliver replied, kissing the tip of her nose. “If you had taken the kids with you, you would have completely ruined the surprise.”

Felicity cocked her head. “You planned coming here?”

“Sure,” Oliver answered, tightening his arms around her waist and kissing first the right and then the left corner of her mouth. “You did the same for me.”

“I did?”

Oliver smiled. “When I had to go on my first business trip after we found out you were pregnant, I asked you to come with me because I really didn’t like the thought of being apart from you and the baby, but you said that maybe that wasn’t the best idea given the stress with the flights and the time differences and everything. And then you just followed me to the East Coast anyway and got into my hotel room while I was working, so when I came back to the hotel, you waited in the bed, dressed in some new lingerie set, and we had fun all night. I always wanted to give you something back for that.”

“Oh, I remember that,” Felicity replied with a nostalgic smile. She let her hands sink down over his chest and hooked her forefingers into the belt loops of his jeans, tugging slightly. “Am I going to find a thong with tiger pattern covering… or actually not covering… your butt when I undress you?”

“No,” Oliver said with a chuckle. “I thought I’d rather bring the kids with me than lingerie, especially since you wanted to take them with you. No word about me. That really hurt my feelings.”

Oliver put his hand to his chest, making a dramatically pained face.

“Oh, poor baby,” Felicity replied, wrapping her arms back around his neck and kissing him gently. “I guess I have to make up for that back at home, right?”

“Well, you don’t have to,” Oliver replied, grinning sheepishly, “but I wouldn’t bother.”

“You’re saying?” Felicity said with a smirk. She kissed the underside of his yaw before whispering, “I think we should go to bed now.”

Oliver nodded. “Very good idea. Traveling alone with the kids has been a lot more exhausting than I thought it would be. I actually wanted to be here way earlier, but first Tommy needed some rest, then Emmy got hungry, later Tommy got hungry, then Emmy needed to go to the toilet.”

Felicity chuckled. “I guess you can use the sleep then.”

While Felicity already got into bed and crawled under the blanket, Oliver took off his clothes. She watched him doing so quietly, enjoying the view and pulling Emmy closer to her chest at the same time. The little girl turned in her sleep, snuggling up to her mother’s body, so her face was hidden against her neck. She murmured something in her sleep that Felicity couldn’t understand, but she didn’t need to. Hearing Emmy mumbling contently just made her wrap her arms around her daughter more tightly and press a kiss to the girl’s head, sighing just as contently as Emmy had whispered before.

Oliver climbed into bed on the other side, snuggling close until his chest was resting against Tommy’s bed. The little boy didn’t even stir in his sleep. He just sighed once and kept sleeping.

“Night, Felicity,” Oliver whispered, tangling his fingers with hers under the blanket.

“Night, Oliver. And thank you.”

Felicity closed her eyes with a sigh, only now realizing how tired she really was. She knew it wasn’t only the work that had made her tired but also being apart from her family and missing them like crazy, even if they hadn’t been apart for too long. She couldn’t even imagine how it must have been like without them for Oliver. He had so much more problems dealing with being alone than she had.

She was almost half-asleep when a smile suddenly snuck onto her face. “Oliver?”

“Hm?” he hummed sleepily.

“You do know that the main reason I traveled after you back then was that I was really, really horny, right?”

“And I thought you missed me so much or wanted to give me a treat, but of course it have been only selfish reasons. So disappointed right now.”

Felicity chuckled tiredly. “I’ll make up for it when we’re home.”

“You already owe me make-up sex twice.”

“See? I guess it’s already been worth coming here.”

“It would have been worth it without the sex, too,” Oliver replied squeezing her hand gently. “Seeing you is worth every trouble.”

“You’re sappy.”

“You love it.”

“I love _you_.”

Oliver yawned. “I love you, too.”

It didn’t take long until they both fell asleep, cuddled up with their kids to a picture that Felicity was sure would make a great new picture for her family gallery.


	123. Five wishes

He woke to a soft touch when fingernails were gently scratching the burn scar on his lower back. Next he felt a pair of lips pressing to the corner of his mouth and slowly moving across his cheek towards his ear, peppering kisses on their way. Oliver smiled contently, and a quiet sigh escaped his lips.

“Morning,” he whispered.

“It’s only two a.m.,” Felicity whispered back, her breath ghosting over the shell of his ear while she was doing so. “I don’t think that counts as morning yet.”

Oliver sighed sleepily once more, enjoying the feeling of Felicity’s fingers and lips on his skin. He knew it elicited goose bumps all over his body.

“Why are you awake at two a.m.?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied. Her hand moved from his lower back upwards until her fingertips could play with her hair at the lower back of his neck. Her lips pressed to the spot right under his ear, a spot that he loved on her body because it made her moan quietly like only kissing that one spot of her body did. “I just woke up, saw that it was past midnight and thought I’d use the opportunity with the kids still being asleep to wish my favorite husband a happy birthday.”

“Your favorite husband?” Oliver asked, opening one eye to blink at her in the darkness. “How many husbands do you have?”

“A few,” Felicity chuckled. “You’re lucky that you’re my favorite one. Rodrigo can do this thing with his hip that is really-“

Her words were interrupted by a high-pitched screech when Oliver quickly turned around, rolling himself on top of her and pressing her back into the mattress in one fluent movement she probably hadn’t seen coming.

She was still giggling quietly when he asked, “Is that the right way to wish your favorite and _only_ husband a happy birthday?”

Felicity’s hands came to wrap around his neck, and her legs closed around his hips, pulling her close to him until his body was pressed flush against hers. Oliver’s eyes had adjusted to the darkness by now, allowing him to see the happy smile on Felicity’s lips and the expression of utter and unconditional love in her eyes. It made his heart stop a beat.

“Happy birthday, Oliver.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned down and met Felicity’s lips in a gentle kiss. Her tongue moved out and traced the seam of his lips, making him open up to her with a content sigh.

Only a few years ago his birthday hadn’t been anything he would have even considered celebrating.

In his five years away every day had looked like the other. Every day had been a hell for itself, and you didn’t celebrate life in hell. You just didn’t.

After his return to Starling he had thought that maybe he could celebrate his birthday again. His life had been far from perfect or even good, but at least he had survived the five years away and had felt like his life had had a purpose. He had tried to save his city and worked on righting his father’s wrongs. He had been lonely, but at least whatever had been left of him had been back. And that should have been a reason to celebrate.

Tommy’s death had changed everything, though. His best friend had died right in front of him on his birthday exactly seven years ago today.

When his lips parted from Felicity’s with the desperate need for air, whether because of the urgency of the kiss or because of the feeling of helplessness his memories had caused, he felt Felicity’s gentle hands frame his face. Her fingertips moved over his skin to his forehead, following the frown there. Of course she had known that his thoughts had drifted away to darker times. She just knew him that well.

“You need a few minutes?” she whispered into the quiet, moving her hands down to his cheeks again.

“Just one,” Oliver assured, bending his arms that he had stayed propped up to and sliding down in bed a little, so he could relax against Felicity’s body completely. He rested his head on her chest, pressing his ear to the top of her left breast and enjoying that he could listen to the beat of her heart like he did so often. “Give me just one minute.”

“There is no need to hurry,” Felicity assured him. “You have all the time in the world.”

She wrapped her right arm around his shoulders and put her right hand into his hair, slowly stroking over his scalp.

This was his life. When he felt bad on a day that he was supposed to be happy, Felicity always gave him the time he needed. She wrapped her arms around him and offered whatever comfort he accepted. No reproaches for ruining the moment.

He was alive, and he had a family that loved him. They were worth whatever struggle and whatever pain he had had to go through. They were the reason that celebrating his birthday finally felt… okay again. Actually it felt more than okay.

He had lost his parents. He had lost his best friend. And he had lost so many other people.

But he had gained something, too. He had gained this family. He had gained Felicity and Emmy and Tommy. And having them was a reason to celebrate his birthday.

Sighing, he pressed a kiss to the top of Felicity’s breast and then rested his chin where his lips had touched her skin only seconds before. Felicity looked at him with a gentle smile and put her hand to his cheek.

“Better?”

“Way better. Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Felicity replied in a whisper. “Do you want your present now?”

Oliver smirked. “I’ve been looking forward to that all week.”

He propped himself back up onto his forearms and slid up the bed again, so he could kiss Felicity. His lips pressed to hers hungrily, while his hands were already moving down the sides of her body to her hips and under the fabric of her thin shirt or rather his shirt since she had stolen it from him. Her skin felt so soft against his rough fingertips that a quiet moan escaped his lips in response. He rubbed his hips against hers, eliciting a lustful moan from Felicity.

She moved her hands from the back of his neck down over his shoulder to his chest and pushed at him until he moved back.

“What-?” he asked with a frown but interrupted himself when Felicity reached out her hand for the small light on her nightstand and switched on the light. She had to blink multiple times, and her whole face screw up when she did so. It was one of the cutest things Oliver had ever seen, and he couldn’t help but smile at the sight despite his confusion for her having pushed him away.

“I want to give you your present.”

Oliver’s frown deepened even more. Birthday sex was his present. Birthday sex had always been his present, and he couldn’t get enough of it. He looked forward to it every year. Birthday sex followed close behind anniversary sex on his list of top special sex scenarios. On a third rank was the thank you sex, and a little farer behind on the forth rank the make-up sex. Make-up sex could easily make it more to the top because the sex was always great, but Oliver just didn’t like fighting with Felicity.

“Birthday sex is my present,” Oliver replied. “I always get birthday sex.”

Felicity chuckled. “You sound like Emmy when she doesn’t get ice cream.”

“Well, to be fair – what’s a birthday without birthday sex?”

“Poor baby,” Felicity teased him, patting the top of his head. Oliver already opened his lips to complain, but she hastily pressed her lips to his, silencing him before he could say anything. “Don’t worry. You’ll get your birthday sex, too. But first I have a different present for you.”

Oliver observed her carefully while Felicity trying to wiggle away from under him. Sighing, Oliver rolled himself off of her and back on his bedside. Felicity meanwhile turned onto her side and opened the drawer of her nightstand. She pulled out a small box with a big red bow on top of it, handing it to him with a bright smile on her lips.

“What’s that?” he asked.

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Oliver, that is not how presents work. You need to unwrap it.”

“Right,” he said, probably smiling like an idiot at the way Felicity looked at him like she was a child looking at her presents under the Christmas tree.

He rubbed his hands together shortly before he opened the box and took out the five envelopes in it. Casting Felicity a questioning gaze, he took them out. Felicity smiled, biting down on her bottom lip and nodding her head encouragingly, so Oliver opened the first. He frowned when the only thing he found in it was a white note card, and he frowned even more when the other four envelopes held nothing different. Five envelopes, five note cards.

Clearing his throat, Oliver looked up at Felicity and said, “I’m afraid I don’t understand.”

Chuckling, Felicity crawled into his lap, taking the five envelopes from him and holding them in front of his face like a fan.

“This, my dear, is the fulfilling of all of your dreams,” she explained, already opening her mouth to say more when she hastily added, “or at least five of them. You know, I would have given you more, but then I wasn’t sure how creative you really are and didn’t want this to be awkward, and-“

Hastily Oliver sat up and pressed his lips to hers, interrupting her babble. It had always been his favorite way of making her stop talking. When their lips parted, he just looked at her and gave her a slight nod to make her know that she could continue or rather start with telling him what exactly he was supposed to do with his gift.

“I will fulfill five of the fantasies of your secret sex wish list.”

Oliver felt his mouth going dry.

He had never intended on telling Felicity about the list he had made up in his head about what things he would love to try with her in bed… or wherever else. It had just been a fun thing for him to do when he hadn’t been able to sleep. But then a comment about that list had escaped his lips, and ever since Felicity had tried again and again to winkle something about it out of him. Oliver had always denied.

The fun about that list was that he didn’t actively worked on making his fantasies come true. Sometimes they just happened, though; like the one time they had had sex in the changing room of a boutique because they hadn’t been able to stop themselves any longer after busy nights in the Arrow cave and exhausting times with the kids had forced them through weeks of abstinence.

Oliver wouldn’t deny himself the pleasure of getting his fantasies fulfilled when Felicity offered, though. Who cared if they were actively working on making these fantasies play out and didn’t just let them happen? It wouldn’t make the sex any less real.

“So how will this work?”

“You will take these envelopes,” Felicity replied, giving them back to him, “and when you have an idea-“

“Won’t be lacking those.”

“-you will write it down and make sure I get the envelope back, and presupposed that there are no villains attacking the city or sick kids terrorizing us or major preparations required I will make your fantasy happen within one week.”

“Whatever I want?”

“Whatever you want,” Felicity replied with a smile, and watched his smirk widening even more in response. Cocking her head, she stated, “Maybe I should impose some restrictions.”

“Shoot.”

“No third parties,” she explained. “If your wish list includes a threesome, keep it in your head because it will never play out in reality.”

“I don’t want to have sex with anyone but you anyway.”

Felicity cocked her head. “You know, most guys would have said they didn’t like to share.”

“Well, that thought was in my head, but I decided to go the cheesy way.”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head.

“Any other restrictions?”

“Everything you wish for has to be something new. Nothing we have done already.”

“Like I said before, it won’t be lacking ideas,” Oliver said with a smirk. “Anything else?”

“Well, I wouldn’t call it a restriction per se, but if I ever find out that you have fantasies about cheating, I will cut your balls off.”

“You just made the thought of you as a dominatrix even more attractive.”

“Is that a wish you want me to fulfill tonight?”

Oliver chuckled. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lay back into the pillows, taking her with him.

“No,” he replied, shaking his head. “Tonight I just want you and me and slow birthday sex.”

“You and me and slow birthday sex,” Felicity repeated, lowering her lips to the side of his neck. She peppered little kisses there, adding between them, “Your wish will be granted, and, lucky you, we’ve already done that before, so you still have all five wishes for later.”

“Lucky me,” Oliver whispered, and with a content hum he leaned back into the pillows and enjoyed the caress of Felicity’s lips. Birthday sex and the promise of more adventurous sex in the future – this birthday really was worth celebrating, and it was only two a.m. yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You will see in the chapter plan I will post soon that we will see these five wishes playing out in the chapters 130, 133, 141, 146 and 150.
> 
> I will totally accept sugestions for what is on that list - positions, scenarios or whatever else comes to your mind. I will choose the ones that inspire me the most.
> 
> So far on the list:  
> \- Felicity stripping for Oliver  
> \- rival CEOs
> 
>  
> 
> In case you're interested in what is going to expect in the next thirty chapters, you can find the chapter plan (of course with some blacked out parts) here:  
> http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/144658576420/time-for-a-story-spoiler-alarm


	124. Broken hearts

Oliver shot another glance outside, hoping to see Felicity’s car in their driveway or at least in the street. His hope was disappointed, though. It seemed like Felicity’s last meeting had indeed taken longer. When they had talked on the phone during her short lunch break today, she had told him that it might take longer. Until now he had hoped that maybe she had been wrong, and the meeting wouldn’t take that long.

Great, Oliver thought bitterly and felt his stomach twisting painfully at the thought that apparently he had to be the one to put Emmy to bed tonight. It only made him feel even more horrible.

Putting the kids to bed had always been one of his favorite parts of the day. He loved watching Tommy’s eyes fighting the tiredness before eventually he fell asleep. He loved when Emmy tried to obtain fifteen minutes more only to fall asleep after five. He loved cuddling with the kids when they couldn’t fall asleep immediately. He loved telling them bedtime stories or singing them a lullaby. He loved all of that.

Or at least he had loved all of that until last week. He had thought it would be a good week, an excellent week to be exact. After two months Samantha had finally agreed to at least let the kids meet. Oliver suspected that William had begged her to let him meet Emmy and Tommy because they were his half-siblings after all and Oliver had told him a lot about them. So Oliver had been really excited because although he didn’t like that Felicity was still not allowed around William, with the kids meeting each other it was the first step she had taken towards him in regards to ending this double family life he was leading with Felicity, Emma and Tommy in Starling and William in Central City.

He couldn’t have more wrong.

 

_“You look nervous,” Felicity said, taking his hand and squeezing his fingers comfortingly. “You okay?”_

_“I am nervous,” Oliver confirmed, not taking his eyes off where Emmy was sitting on the couch and playing with Felicity’s tablet. “Is that crazy?”_

_“No, not at all.”_

_Oliver turned his head to look at Felicity, finding nothing but love and support in her eyes. Smiling, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to her forehead in a grateful kiss._

_“Thank you,” he whispered against her skin. “And I’m sorry that-“_

_“I told you that you don’t have to apologize for that,” Felicity interrupted him, squeezing his fingers once more. “I can be patient. I’ll meet William when Samantha is ready for me to meet him.”_

_“I wouldn’t know what I’d do without you.”_

_“Well, luckily you don’t ever have to think about that.”_

_Oliver’s smile widened even more, and he brushed his lips against Felicity’s in a gentle kiss. Since he had found out about his son in Central City, Felicity had been nothing but supportive. She had done whatever she could have done to help him meet his son as often as possible, and not once had she held against him that he was away too often or that she wasn’t allowed to meet William, too._

_“You’re ready?” she finally asked._

_Oliver took in a deep breath. “I’m not sure. Telling Emmy is a big step.”_

_“It is,” Felicity agreed, “but she is our daughter, and we know how much Emmy enjoys being a sister. She still sneaks out of her bedroom and into Tommy’s crib some nights.”_

_“I know,” Oliver replied tensely, taking in another deep breath. “I’m just… nervous.”_

_“So let’s better get this over with, right?”_

_“Right.”_

_They approached Emmy together. When Felicity sat down to Emmy’s right and Oliver to her left, the little girl looked up from the tablet._

_“Oh-oh,” she made her usual response to her mother using her loud voice._

_Felicity chuckled, taking the tablet from her daughter’s hands and switching it off. “There is no oh-oh needed here right now. We are not going to rant and rave at you.”_

_“We just want to talk to you about something important,” Oliver added while Felicity was putting the tablet onto the couch table._

_Emmy looked at him closely, waiting for him to talk, but Oliver didn’t know how to start. How was he going to say this? How was he going to explain this to Emmy? He himself still had trouble understanding this sometimes, and he was several decades older and had had several weeks to process by now._

_He looked at Felicity over Emmy’s head, silently asking for help, and Felicity pulled Emmy onto her lap and slid closer to Oliver in response._

_“Emmy, what would you say if I told you that you have two brothers?”_

_“Really?” Emmy asked, and her whole face lightened up with a happy smile. Before anyone could say another word, Emmy wrapped her arms around her mother’s middle and snuggled her face to Felicity’s stomach. “Hi, baby.”_

_Oliver’s eyes met Felicity’s gaze over the head of their daughter in surprise. This was not what they had anticipated would happen though they probably should have seen this coming. Emmy had been asking about having another baby brother for awhile already._

_“No, no, Emmy,” Oliver said hastily. His voice was husky, and his throat itched, so he cleared his throat. He reached out his hands for Emmy and pulled her from Felicity’s and onto his own thighs. His lips pressed to the crown of her head at the disappointed expression in her eyes. “You’re not having a brother like that.”_

_“But mommy said…” she started but stopped, not understanding what was going on and gesturing towards Felicity’s stomach once more._

_“You have another brother, Emmy, but he is not going to grow in mommy’s belly,” Oliver explained, glancing at Felicity shortly to make sure she felt like he was doing it right. “His name is William. He is twelve years old, and he is living in Central City with his mother.”_

_Emmy frowned at him before looking at her mother. “Mommy?”_

_Felicity slid closer, putting one hand to Emmy’s back and the other to Oliver’s shoulder. He felt the touch of her warm skin calm his nerves a little. He was usually good at talking with Emmy, but of course he never had to tell her about the existence of a half-sibling before, and he had to admit that it felt like the most challenging thing he had ever had to talk about to her._

_“You know, before daddy knew mommy, he… liked other girls very much.”_

_“Not as much as I like mommy of course.”_

_Felicity shot him a strict glance before she looked back at Emmy with a soft smile on her lips. “So daddy is also William’s daddy, but William has a different mommy.”_

_Emmy’s frown deepened. She looked from Felicity to Oliver and back again._

_“William’s mom said that you and Tommy can meet him,” Felicity continued after awhile, gently stroking her hand over Emmy’s curly hair, “so daddy, Tommy and you will go to Central City next week and do something fun with William.”_

_“You’re coming with us?”_

_“I have to work,” Felicity replied without hesitation, still smiling gently, “but I’ll come with you some other time.”_

_Emmy didn’t reply. She just continued to watch her mother closely._

_“Do you have questions?” Oliver asked gently. “This has been a lot and-“_

_“Mommy?” Emmy interrupted him, crawling off his lap and back onto Felicity’s thighs. “Can you put me to bed?”_

_“Uhm… sure,” Felicity replied, getting up from the couch with Emmy on her arms. “Today was a long day, hm? You want daddy to tell you a bedtime story?”_

_“No. You do that.”_

_“Okay, so I’ll do that.”_

_Oliver watched Felicity carrying Emmeline upstairs, feeling a weight lifting from his chest. Once Emmy would meet her half-brother and a little time had passed, she would really understand and probably be just as excited as she had been with Tommy. He just needed to give her a little more time._

 

Oliver splashed some cold water into his face, realizing once more how horribly wrong he had been about this.

Maybe he should have realized it that evening already, but it wasn’t unusual for Emmy to ask Felicity to put her to bed. Since Felicity had started working and was at Queen Industries for most of the day, Emmy liked her mom to put her to bed in the evening. Oliver didn’t mind. He loved putting the kids to bed, but he had them all day anyway, so of course he left this moment to Felicity. When he had been the one working, putting the kids to bed had been his silver lining all day.

Anyway, even if Emmy’s behavior that evening hadn’t raised any suspicions, several incidents in the seven days since they had told Emmy had, though.

Emmy had no interest in doing thing with him anymore. She didn’t want to go eat ice cream with him anymore. She didn’t want to play with him anymore. She didn’t want to hang out and watch movies with him all day. She didn’t want anything to do with him at all. Actually she right out ignored him most of the day. When he talked to her, she didn’t answer. When he told her to do something, she just continued doing whatever she was doing like she hadn’t heard him.

What had seemed like her stubborn five minutes as Felicity and he liked to call it had very soon gotten out of hand. He had thought she had had a bad day, hadn’t slept well or had had an argument with one of her friends in the playgroup, so he had wanted to comfort her and suggest going to the zoo or something. He had put his hand to the crown of Emmy’s head, wanting to stroke his fingers over her hair, but as soon as he had touched her, she had lashed out. She had slapped his hand away and screamed that he should go away. He had wanted to calm her down and tell her that she could tell him what was going on with her, but as soon as he had assured her that he loved her, she had crossed her arms in front of her chest and told him that she didn’t love him anymore.

The words still made his heart hurt terribly. Emmy had always been his little girl. She had always loved him, even if he had forbidden her to eat ice cream before dinner, she loved him, and she hated being forbidden to eat ice cream. This was different, though. She was disappointed in him, and she didn’t love him anymore.

The last time Oliver had felt so helpless and so hurt had been when Felicity had suffered from prenatal depression, and he hadn’t known about it. He had only realized that she had been distanced, and he had felt like she didn’t love him anymore. This felt terribly similar to that painful time he didn’t like to think about.

Oliver had wanted to tell Felicity, but she had been snowed in with work these last days, and he hadn’t wanted to give her even more reason to worry. He had told her that Emmy wasn’t delighted about having a half-brother, and she was still trying to process the news, but he hadn’t told her about how bad it really was. When things hadn’t calmed down until the weekend, he would tell her, though. Emmy needed her mother now, and honestly Oliver needed Felicity’s comfort, too.

Taking in another deep breath, Oliver headed upstairs. Tommy was already asleep. He was so wonderfully oblivious to what was happening around him. When usually he was really exhausting with hours of crying fits, he had been kind of calm and satisfied these last days. He had actually been the easy child to take care of for once.

Oliver heard her humming in the bathroom and wondered if she had actually listened to him for once this week and gotten ready for bed already. When he stepped into the bathroom, he found her sitting on the small carpet with her pajama already put on, playing with her doll.

“Emmy, come on, it’s time for bed,” he said, not missing that his voice sounded insecure.

He had never been insecure around her, not even at the very beginning because he had loved her so much, and he had known that she loved him. Now that there were doubts about that, though, Oliver couldn’t help but feel insecure, and he hated it. His family was the one thing he had never felt any insecurities about because he knew he was a good father and a good husband despite his masked alter-ego. It had taken him a long time until he had finally been able to feel confident about his relationship to Felicity. One he had been in, he had been all in, though. He didn’t want to lose what life with his family gave him.

He watched Emmy keeping playing, pretending that he wasn’t there. Of course she did! Why would it be any different tonight than it had been in the last nights?

Oliver took in a deep breath, saying a little more sharply, “Emmy, I don’t want to have to say it again.”

Again she didn’t react to his words, so with a low sigh Oliver took the doll from her hands, and repeated. “Emmy, you will go to bed. Now.”

“No, I’m waiting for mommy.”

“Mommy is coming home late tonight,” Oliver explained gently, trying to hide his surprise that Emmy was replying to him in the first place. “You can’t wait so long, but I’ll tell mommy to come to you and kiss you goodnight before she goes to bed, okay? Now come on, I’m-“

“No,” Emmy replied again, looking at him poutedly and crossing her arms in front of her little chest. “I’m waiting for mommy.”

“No, you’re going to bed,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “Come on, I’m going to carry you-“

“Go away! Mommy! I want mommy! I want mommy!”

Hastily Oliver let go of Emmy. He had put his hands to her forearms, intending to lift her from the floor, but the moment he had touched her, she had started screaming. She was kicking her legs and slapping her hands after him wildly, making it hard to set her back to the floor without risking that she got hurt. The moment she was safely kneeling on the floor, still screaming though her screams were now interrupted by sobs every once in a while, Oliver took a large step backwards, giving her room.

He hated seeing her like that, and he hated even more that he couldn’t help her. Emmy was his little girl, and he had always had a really good relationship with her. She trusted him with secrets, at least as far as a three-year-old had any secrets. He had always thought that it would stay like. He had hoped it would stay like that.

“Emmy, you-“

“I want mommy!”

Oliver watched helplessly how Emmy continued to cry. It was that bad that it sounded like she had trouble breathing. Her face had turned red, and-

“What’s going on here?”

“Mommy!”

Emmy hastily got up from the floor and ran to her mother. Felicity lifted the toddler into her arms, and Emmy wrapped her arms around her mother tightly, hiding her face against the side of Felicity’s neck. She was sobbing loudly, her whole body shaking. Felicity rubbed her hand over her daughter’s back comfortingly, rocking her in her arms slowly.

When his eyes met Felicity’s gaze, she mouthed the question, what was going on, once more. Oliver tried to answer, but he felt like there was no response that could possibly describe the situation right. He felt his throat closing at the thought.

“I need some air,” he stated, walking past Felicity and Emmeline and outside.

 

 

Felicity glanced at Emmeline, who was peacefully sleeping in her bed, once more before she closed the door. She took in a deep breath and breathed out with a low sigh of exhaustion.

It had been a busy day at work, and all Felicity had wanted to do after coming home had been kissing the kids goodnight even if they were asleep already and then fall into bed herself. Instead she had spent the last hour calming Emmy down or rather listening to her daughter’s worries and rocking her in her arms until she had cried herself to sleep.

Now she would have to have a serious talk to Oliver. She had suspected that there was something going on because he had seemed off these last days since they had told Emmy about William, but she would have never thought that it was that bad.

When Felicity found Oliver sitting on the steps of their terrace, her heart sunk even more and ever thought of having a serious talk to him slipped her mind. He sat in a crouched position with his head lowered. His chest was lifting and falling with his even breaths, so he probably wasn’t crying, but Felicity knew he wasn’t okay, either.

Quietly she joined him outside, sitting down on the step behind him with one leg to each of his sides. She wrapped her arms around him from behind and pulled him close until his back rested against her chest, and his head fell to her shoulder. Felicity pressed her lips to his forehead before looking into his face. His eyes were closed, but the expression in his face was still a pained one.

“I know you said you need some air which is universal code for not wanting to talk, but…”

“I’m glad you’re here,” Oliver replied in a whisper, taking her hands and wrapping her arms around him even more tightly. “She doesn’t understand it.”

“No, she doesn’t,” Felicity agreed with a sigh. She leaned her head against Oliver’s and closed her eyes. “She told me that one of the kids in her playgroup told her that her daddy is having a baby with someone else than her mommy. The daddy is moving out now to live with the other woman and their baby. She’s scared that will happen with us, too. Her behavior is her way to protect herself from the pain that she thinks will come.”

“She told me she didn’t love me anymore.”

Felicity opened her eyes again, leaning her head back a little, so she could look at him. She could see tears glistening in his eyes, and it broke her heart.

“She doesn’t mean it,” Felicity whispered. “She loves you so much that she is scared that you will leave now.”

“I’m not going to leave. You know that, right?”

“Of course I know that,” Felicity replied, pressing her lips to his temple, “and Emmy will realize that, too. She just… Maybe we just need to sit down with her and tell her-“

“She doesn’t talk to me. She… ignores me most of the day.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“Because you had so much work to do, and you’ve been so supportive about this situation in the first place, I didn’t want to complain to you and…” Oliver closed his eyes, looking at her. “I’m sorry.”

Felicity smiled sadly. “It’s okay, but you know you can always talk to me, right? I love you, and-“

When they heard sounds over the baby phone in Tommy’s room, Felicity sighed.

“I guess Emmy is sneaking into Tommy’s room again.”

“Can you please check if she is alright?” Oliver asked. “I don’t want her to cry herself to sleep or something, but I think if I go upstairs, it will only end in other screaming fit.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. She tightened her arms around him for a moment, squeezing his chest in silent comfort, before she lowered her lips to his ear and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Sighing, she got up from the stairs and headed back upstairs to Tommy’s nursery where she indeed found both of her children cuddling in the small crib. Tommy was fast asleep. Emmy’s chest was snuggled up to her brother’s back, and one of her arms was wrapped around his tiny body while she was watching him with sad eyes. Luckily Tommy had turned into a stone when sleeping lately. Otherwise he would have woken up and would be crying already.

“Hey, sweetie,” Felicity whispered.

“Hi, mommy.”

Felicity stepped in front of the crib, looking at her daughter with gentle eyes and asking, “You’re okay?”

“When’s daddy going to leave?”

Felicity felt her heart break a little at how small the little girl’s voice sounded. She reached out her hands and lifted Emmy out of the crib and into her arms. Immediately the toddler snuggled up to her mother while Felicity was walking them to the rocking chair.

“Emmy, I think daddy and I didn’t explain it well when we told you about your brother William,” Felicity started in a whisper to not wake Tommy when she had sat down in the rocking chair with Emmy in her lap. “Can you listen to me please?”

Emmy hesitated, snuggling closer to Felicity. Her hand grabbed the neckline of her mother’s dress like Tommy usually did. It took awhile, but eventually she nodded.

“The most important thing first,” Felicity stated, and Emmy looked at her mother with alert eyes. “Daddy loves Tommy, you and me very, very much.”

When Emmy wanted to lower her face, Felicity hastily put her fingers under her daughter’s chin and waited until the toddler looked at her again before she repeated, “Daddy loves all of us very much. He doesn’t want to leave us, and he is not going to leave us.”

“But-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted gently. “Daddy loved us, and daddy loves William, but that means there is only going to be more love. He doesn’t love us less, and he is not going to leave us.”

Tears sprang into Emmy’s eyes. “Really, mommy?”

“Really.”

“Never?”

Felicity hesitated for the beat of a second, knowing how dangerous a promise like this could be, especially given their crazy lifestyle. So instead of answering directly, she asked back, “Do you remember when you had these itchy, red spots all over you, and I had to stay with Thea for awhile?”

Emmy shook her head.

“Tommy was still in my tummy back then, and the itchy, red spots would have hurt him, so I wasn’t allowed to be close to you, and I had to stay with Thea.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Felicity replied with a smile. “I wanted to be with you, but I couldn’t. Sometimes there are things happening that mean we can’t be close to the people we love, but as long as daddy has the chance to decide about it, he will always stay with us.”

“Really?” Emmy asked once more.

“Really.”

For awhile neither of them said anything more. Felicity watched the frown on Emmy’s forehead while she was trying to figure out what exactly her mother’s word meant. Felicity just stroked her hand over her daughter’s back and waited until she had processed the information. She regretted not having explained it that well the first time around. Sometimes she just forgot that Emmy was only three years old and had her own logic about things.

“And William?” Emmy asked. “Doesn’t daddy love him, too?”

“Of course daddy loves William, but he has only found out about William a few days ago, you know?”

“Why didn’t he know before?”

“That’s a very complicated question,” Felicity replied. Emmy continued to look at her, waiting for an answer. “I’m… going to tell you that some other time, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh, not too happy about her mother’s answer.

“What I can tell you, though, is that daddy is really sad because he missed a lot of time with William when he was little. He didn’t get to do all the fun things he does with Tommy and you.”

“Like what?”

“Like watching you take your first step or tickling Tommy and making him laugh.”

“And like giving me ice cream after you said ‘no’ already?”

 “Yes, things like that,” Felicity replied with a quiet chuckle before she got serious again. “So daddy is very sad because he missed all of that. Do you understand that?”

Emmy nodded. “Does he need a hug?”

“I think he could really use a big hug.”

“Should I go and give daddy a hug?”

“Yes, I think that is a great idea,” Felicity replied.

Emmy didn’t let herself be told twice. She slid off her mother’s lap and ran to the door. Felicity heard the scurried footsteps when she followed her daughter, and it made her smile in relief. She hated seeing Emmy unhappy, and she hated seeing Oliver unhappy, and seeing both of them being unhappy at the same time was just a nightmare.

The better she felt at the sight she was met with when she got downstairs, though. Oliver was still sitting on the step of the stairs where he had been sitting before. Emmy had crawled onto his lap. Her short arms wrapped around his neck tightly while she was pecking his face with lots of kisses.

“That’s a sight I enjoy coming home to,” Felicity said when she stepped out on the terrace.

Oliver got up on his feet and turned around with Emmy still on his arms and kissing his face. Felicity could see tears of relief in his eyes, and she felt her throat burning when tears sprang into her eyes, too.

“Daddy, you don’t have to cry anymore,” Emmy said, wiping the tears off her father’s cheeks with her gentle, little hands. “It’s okay now.”

“Yes, it’s okay now,” Oliver replied, wrapping both his arms around Emmy more tightly.

His eyes never left Felicity’s face, and he mouthed a silent ‘Thank you’, pointing at the baby phone on his belt to let her know that he had heard everything she had told Emmy. Felicity just smiled in response.

She watched Oliver and Emmy being reunited awhile longer before she said, “It’s late, Emmy, and I think it is time for bed now.”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh. “Will you put me to bed, daddy?”

“Yes, of course,” Oliver replied, kissing her cheek.

When Oliver went past Felicity, Emmy rested her head on her father’s shoulder and closed her eyes, already half asleep. She’d probably be fast asleep before they had reached the head of the stairs.

Felicity went inside and sat down on the couch, closing her eyes. She was so very tired, it probably wouldn’t take long before she’d fall asleep, too. Oliver was hopefully going to show heart and carry her upstairs and to bed once he had put Emmy to sleep. Otherwise she was probably going to get a horrible backache because the couch just wasn’t meant to be slept on, especially not in a sitting position like this one.

She was already on the edge of falling asleep when she heard Emmy’s whispered voice saying, “I love you, daddy.”

With a content smile on her lips she fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any questions or suggestions for this fic, always feel free to contact me either here, on tumblr or (NEW!) on twitter. I use the same username (smkkbert) everywhere.


	125. First meeting

“How much longer, daddy?”

“Only a few more minutes.”

“You said that before.”

“That’s because you asked only a few seconds ago,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. He turned to Emmy, who was leaning against the side of his legs languidly, and stroke his hand over her curly, blonde hair. “William sent me a message that the bus is three minutes late, but it should be here any minute.”

Emmy sighed, making Oliver smile gently. The days Emmy had ignored if not even hated him because she had been scared of losing him were almost forgotten. Or maybe they weren’t forgotten and actually reminded in each and every detail, but it only made him so much more grateful for being back in a good place with his little girl. Of course there was still that little painful stitch in his heart when he thought about how she had told him that she didn’t love him anymore, but he would get over that, too.

He kept stroking his fingers through Emmy’s short hair when he turned his head towards the bus station in front of the zoo, watching out for William’s bus to come.

Oliver hadn’t been sure if the zoo was a good place to introduce his kids to each other, but it had been the only place he had been able to think about. He had read on several websites and blogs that he shouldn’t introduce the kids at one of their homes because the kid who lived there could feel threatened. Finding a place that a twelve-year-old boy as well as a three-year-old girl would like hadn’t been easy, though, especially because it had also required to be appropriate for Tommy. Luckily William had agreed to meet in a zoo.

“How much longer now, daddy?”

Oliver chuckled, pointing towards the street. “Look, Emmy, I think that is the bus.”

Eager to see her new brother as soon as possible, Emmy straightened up, so she didn’t lean against his legs any longer, but she wrapped one arm around his leg in the meantime like she still feared he was going to leave.

“Don’t worry,” he told her calmly. “I’m right here, and I am not going anywhere.”

He felt Emmy relax a little though her arm stayed wrapped around his leg. Oliver watched her for a moment longer before he turned his gaze back to the bus where people were now dismounting. His heartbeat fastened and his breath got caught in his throat when he saw William dismounting from the bus.

The first time that the kids were meeting each other was a big deal, so of course he was nervous. He had underestimated how nervous he would be about this, though. He had barely been able to get any sleep last night because he had been so nervous about this day. Instead of lying down and get some rest, he had walked up and down in the hotel suit, thinking through every possible scenario of what could happen.

Felicity must have felt his nervousness to Starling City. She had called him at two a.m. and without even asking if she had woken him complained that she couldn’t sleep because she just knew that he was restlessly walking up and down in the hotel suit, and it just drove her insane. She had talked to him for an hour, calming his nerves with her soft voice until he had fallen asleep. If there had ever been any doubt if Felicity was his soul mate, it would have been wiped away that second.

“Daddy, you look strange,” Emmy said.

When he turned his head to look at his daughter, he found her standing next to him with her head cocked and a frown on her forehead. Oliver chuckled at the strained expression on her face as she was trying to figure out what he was thinking. He tapped his forefinger against the tip of her nose, and she giggled, making the strained expression on her face disappear.

“Hi,” William said shyly when he approached them.

During Oliver’s last visit William had called him dad for the first time. He still felt his throat burning when he thought back to that moment though Oliver knew that he shouldn’t count on that being normal any time soon. William was still getting to know him. It felt like a big step, though.

William lowered his gaze to Emmeline and Tommy in his stroller, but he quickly looked away again, and pushed his hands into the pocket of his jeans. Oliver always did the same thing when he felt insecure.

“William,” Oliver said, letting go of the stroller to put his hands to Emmy’s shoulders and gently encourage her to stand in front of him. “This is Emmy.”

“Hi,” William said, raising his hand for a short wave while smiling insecurely at Emmy.

Emmy didn’t reply. Instead she held onto Oliver’s hands and turned around a little, so she could hide her face against his legs. She had her eyes lowered to the floor, but Oliver could see her smiling, telling him that she was just a little shy which would probably be a first in her young life.

Oliver looked at William, shaking his head reassuringly at the worried expression in his son’s face. He didn’t want William to think that Emmy hated him or anything. The situation was complicated and weird enough as it was.

Oliver leaned down and whispered into Emmy’s ear, “Do you want to introduce William to Tommy? I think Tommy would like you to do that.”

It took a short moment, but eventually Emmy turned back around to William. She let go of Oliver’s right hand to instead take Tommy’s little fingers into hers. Her left hand still held onto Oliver’s left one tightly, though. Oliver squeezed her fingers in quiet reassurance, and Emmy glanced first at him and then at William, but hastily turned her gaze to Tommy, who was sitting in his stroller and playing with his pacifier like he saw it the first time in his life.

“Tommy?” Emmy asked, and immediately the boy put the pacifier between his lips and looked at his sister with his piercing blue eyes. “Tommy, this is William.”

Tommy didn’t care to look at his new brother. He just continued to look at Emmy until he realized she wasn’t doing anything funny. When that happened, he just leaned back in his stroller again and sighed.

Oliver met William’s gaze once more and again smiled reassuringly. He could hardly anticipate how weird this situation had to feel for the boy. Being introduced to his half-siblings who lived with the dad he had only just discovered was his dad, too, couldn’t be easy. And Emmy’s and Tommy’s not too excited reaction probably didn’t make it easier. He must feel like an intruder which hopefully wouldn’t last long because William was family, maybe not for Emmy and Tommy yet, but for him he was.

Oliver wished Felicity was here. She would know how to ease the tension of this awkwardly silent moment. Having her by his side would actually make everything easier because it always did for him.

“Should we go to the entrance and buy the tickets?” Oliver suggested, clearing his throat.

“Yes!” Emmy called out, clapping her hands excitedly.

Maybe when they were in the zoo and seeing the animals, the tension would ease away. It probably just needed a little more time. Felicity had actually said it several times during their nightly phone call. He shouldn’t push anything. The kids would just need a little time to get used to the situation before they could start to really get to know each other.

Just when Oliver was about to turn Tommy’s stroller around and direct it to the entrance, he noticed William’s gaze and asked, “Everything alright?”

“He’s staring at me,” William answered. “It’s… I don’t know… Is that something bad?”

“No,” Oliver replied hastily. “Tommy is just a little suspicious of strangers.”

“But William’s not a stranger, daddy,” Emmy said. “He’s our brother.”

Oliver froze, staring at his daughter. Of course she knew that William was her brother because Felicity and he had told her, but he hadn’t expected her to just outright say it like that. One could argue that she was just repeating the words Felicity and he had told him, but Oliver ignored that thought.

From the corner of his eye he could see William staring at Emmy the same way he did, watching the little girl tickling her baby brother and repeating, “He’s our brother, Tommy.”

Tommy giggled, kicking his little feet against her hands and moving his short arms wildly. He looked past his sister to the newly found brother like he had exactly understood what his sister had just told him.

Oliver’s gaze followed Tommy’s to William, who was now smiling at his two little siblings.

Oliver felt his heart warming at the sight. His kids were slowly getting used to one another and hopefully at the end of the day they would actually like each other, at least as much as possible in so little time.

“Come on, let’s go see the animals,” Oliver suggested.

He turned the stroller and headed towards the entrance. Emmy looked at him shortly, bit down on her bottom lip like Felicity usually did and took William’s hand before following her father.

Oliver knew that he had been wondering about this several times before, but could he love this little girl more than he already did? Only a few days ago she had been scared to lose her daddy to William, and yet here she was, trying to become friends with him. She knew how much William and this first meeting meant to her dad, and Oliver wouldn’t let himself be convinced that there was any other reason for what she was doing than her love for him. His little girl was doing this because she knew how much it meant to him.

“Do you have a favorite animal, William?” Emmy asked.

“I love cheetahs,” he explained. “The zoo has baby cheetahs actually. One of them is called the Flash because of- Do you know who the Flash is?”

Emmy laughed. “Of course I do! It’s un-“

“He’s like Starling City’s Arrow,” Oliver interrupted hastily, looking at Emmy intensely, “Right, sweetie?”

The toddler looked at him for a long moment, obviously considering objecting him on this. Oliver winked at her, though, and she shrugged it off, turning back to William and telling him about her favorite animals, giraffes. Of course she didn’t forget to mention that she had a pink stuffed giraffe that she loved so much, but that he could maybe borrow when he was sick or something.

Oliver released a silent sigh. Since Emmy knew who was behind all the masks, he had reminded her again and again that she couldn’t tell anyone about it. Even if she was only a young kid, people might believe her. So far she had always kept her promise and not talked about it to anyone, at least as far as Oliver knew. They would probably have to have another talk about not telling William, though.

William and Donna would both have to belong into the category of people close to them that couldn’t know about the masks. He had explained to her that Donna would be scared if she knew, and he would probably tell her the same about William. Oliver couldn’t even think what would happen if Samantha found out about his masked alter-ego.

He didn’t have to worry about that, though. Emmy could keep a secret. She had proved that several times already.

While they were waiting in line to buy the tickets, Oliver listened to his daughter babbling. She really was her mother’s daughter when it came to talking without taking breaths between her words. She told William what animals she liked most and what animals she didn’t like at all. She also told him how their dad’s favorite animals were kangaroos though she thought it was only because her mommy always snuggled close to him when seeing them because she was scared of them.

Oliver felt most of the nervousness falling off of him. Listening to Emmy’s babbling was just as calming as listening to Felicity’s babbling was.

“Do you always talk so much?” William asked after awhile, a slightly amused expression on his face.

“No,” Emmy replied immediately.

Oliver chuckled. “Yes, she does.”

“Daddy, no!” Emmy replied with a wide grin that gave away the truth. “I don’t.”

“Oh, yes, you do. You and your mom are the masters in talking,” Oliver objected, winking at his daughter, before he leaned forward, leveling his face with Tommy’s. “Tommy, say ‘dada’.”

Tommy only looked at Oliver for a long moment before he took his pacifier out of his mouth and tried to push it between Oliver’s lips with a smile. He didn’t say a word though. Felicity and Oliver had tried to encourage him to say his first words, but still all Tommy had been doing was babbling meaningless syllables. They were waiting for him to say his first word every day, though.

When Oliver straightened up, he shrugged his shoulders, stating, “I think we men might not be into talking too much.”

He winked at William, and the boy smiled back at him. William had told him during one of the first meetings with him that he didn’t like to talk too much, either. It had been the first thing they had found that they had in common. William’s dislike to talk was a lot less intense than Oliver’s, but it was still something they shared.

While Oliver was buying the tickets, Emmy kept talking, sometimes even asking a question like she was trying to get William to talk. She continued talking without giving him the chance to answer, though. Oliver wondered if she knew that she was maybe talking a little bit too much and a little bit too fast, but she was probably too excited for realizing that. She seemed to just want to tell her new brother as much as possible about Tommy and her.

They had just entered the zoo when Emmy suddenly shouted, “There are bears!”

Before Oliver could have told her to stay with them, she had already let go of William’s hand and ran off into the crowd of people and out of his sight.

“Emmy!” Oliver yelled after her, but she didn’t hear.

“I’ll go get her,” William offered and followed his half-sister before Oliver could have thought the idea through.

He took in a deep breath. Emmy knew that she wasn’t allowed to run out of sight or into a crowd of people without someone by her side. He knew how excited she got in zoos, though. William was only twelve years old and this was the first time that he met the feisty, little girl, but since William had offered, Oliver had to trust his son to get along with Emmy.

Hastily he followed the direction his two oldest kids had taken. He had to take a short detour because of the stroller, but it still didn’t take long until he found William and Emmy. What he saw warmed his heart.

The kids had positioned themselves at the fence. Emmy stood on the bottommost rail of it, William close behind her with his arms wrapped around her middle to make sure she wouldn’t fall. He was pointing his finger over her shoulder and down into the enclosure, showing her where he could see a bear sleeping.

Oliver stayed a little aback, pulled out his phone and took a photo that he sent to Felicity.

_The first meeting was a little awkward, but I think the kids get along. I miss you. Oliver_

It didn’t take long for her to reply.

_Glad to hear that. Can’t wait to hear all the stories Emmy will tell when you’re back. P.S. it’s sweet that you still type your name at the end of a message like I get photos of Emmy and William and messages like that by a hundred people each day._

Chuckling, Oliver put his phone back into the pocket of his pants. He would have to think about a good reply to this message before texting her back.

He stayed where he was for a little while longer, watching William and Emmy interact, before he approached them.

“Ready to explore the rest of the park?” he asked.

Immediately Emmy took William’s hand, looking up at him. “Can you show me the cheetahs?”

William smiled proudly. “Sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kasey did another great gifset. Please check out: 
> 
> http://myshipperlife.tumblr.com/post/145410400045/first-meeting-time-for-a-story-by-smkkbert


	126. Hm-mee

“Look, who’s opening the door for mommy,” Felicity said in a cheerful singsong.

Smiling at Tommy, who came crawling towards her, she put her purse onto the small table next to the door and the keys into the little bowl on it. When Tommy reached her, he pulled himself up at her leg and reached out one of his short arms for her to lift him from the floor.

“Hi, buddy,” she said, lifting Tommy into her arms. She pressed a firm kiss to his cheek before she sat Tommy down on her hip. “Did you miss mommy?”

Giggling, Tommy grabbed a strand of his mother’s hair to chew on and rested his head on her shoulder with a sigh. Felicity pressed her lips to the crown of his head and rubbed her hand up and down her son’s back comfortingly. Cuddling with a tired, slightly clingy Tommy always was her favorite part about coming home.

“Hey, you’re home early,” Oliver said stepping out of the kitchen.

“Yes, I was in the mood to come home earlier and-“ Felicity stopped when she looked at Oliver and cocked her head in question at what she saw. “What are you wearing?”

He wore a striped t-shirt she had never seen him wear before – probably because it was really ugly! – and a beige apron with color spots on it. Oliver looked down at him, chuckling lowly and moving his hands over the fabric of the apron.

“Emmy, Tommy and I had a little fun with finger paints today, and I didn’t get around to change back into normal clothes.”

Felicity nodded slowly, not taking her eyes off of him. It took awhile before she asked, “Do you remember when I told you that you looked ridiculously hot no matter what you wear?”

“Sure, why?”

“Because I need to take it back now,” Felicity replied, gesturing towards his clothes.

Oliver chuckled, approaching her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her gently. Felicity leaned against him with a quiet sigh, enjoying how she could feel his heart beat in unison with hers against her chest.

“If you really don’t like this on me, you can help me take it off later,” Oliver suggested.

Felicity smiled, brushing her lips against Oliver’s once more. Tommy didn’t seem to be in the mood to share his cuddle time, though. He put a hand to this father’s chin and pushed him away, moving on Felicity’s arm, so he could lean forward and kiss her lips instead.

“Yeah, I didn’t like to share mommy either before you two monsters came into our lives,” Oliver told Tommy with a chuckle and tickled Tommy’s sides, and the boy laughed in delight, moving up and down on his mother’s arm. Oliver then looked at Felicity again. “I suggest I call Emmy down for dinner like I was just about to do. We feed the kids, put them to bed and then you can help me take this off and maybe wash off the rest of the paint from my body…”

Felicity smiled. “That sounds like a good idea.”

“Great,” Oliver replied. He leaned forward to kiss her once more, but Tommy hastily lifted his head from Felicity’s shoulder again and rested his forehead against her lips instead. Oliver shook his head with a sigh. “Okay, I got the hint. No interrupting your cuddle time with mommy.”

Rolling his eyes, Oliver spun around and went upstairs to get Emmy. Felicity went to the kitchen, following the delicious smell of what she assumed were Oliver’s special pasta with cheese sauce. She rocked Tommy up and down in her arms in the meantime, making him laugh cheerfully.

“Did you enjoy painting with finger paints?” she asked, but Tommy only looked at her for a long moment before he rested his head back on her shoulder. “Or did you miss mommy too much? Can you say ‘mama’ now?”

Felicity sighed when Tommy didn’t answer. She was expecting his first word to come in the very near future. Sometimes his eyes focused on her or on Oliver, and it looked like he was about to say something, but then he just looked away. Felicity was patiently waiting for Tommy to be ready. She just hoped that when he was, his first word would be ‘mama’. Given that Emmy had said ‘dada’ first, it was only fair if Tommy’s first word would be ‘mama’.

Felicity held Tommy in front of her, looking at him pleadingly. “Come on, Tommy. Say ‘mama’.”

But Tommy only sighed and looked around, not saying a word or one of the syllables he used to babble.

“Come on, Tommy. Say it just one time. Say ‘mama’.”

“I fear that is futile,” Oliver stated when he stepped into the kitchen. “I tried to get him to say ‘dada’ almost all day, and he didn’t say it.”

“That is because Tommy loves mommy so much more, right?” Felicity asked, but again all Tommy did was sighing. She kissed his cheek shortly and sat him down in his highchair. Then she turned around to Oliver and cocked her head at him. “I thought we agreed that we would encourage him to say ‘mama’ first.”

Oliver perked his eyebrows. “I don’t remember ever agreeing to that.”

Felicity stepped closer. Stopping right in front of him, she moved her right forefinger up and down his chest and looked at him with a smirk. “Last night, remember? You said, ‘Yes, Felicity. Yes, yes, yes, yes!’”

She bit down on her tongue to keep herself from laughing at the look Oliver shot her. He clearly remembered the context of these words very clearly. Well, how would he forget?

“You do know that I was really distracted by what your mouth was doing when I said that, right?”

“What was your mouth doing, mommy?”

Hastily Felicity took a step back from Oliver, smiling at her daughter instead. The three-year-old looked at her mother questioningly, not understanding her father’s words.

“I- uhm,” Felicity started, looking at Oliver for help, but he only grinned at her smugly. “I was kissing daddy’s cheek, and that was really distracting for him.”

Emmy looked at her mother, not saying a word. Felicity already expected her to say that she didn’t believe that because Emmy was actually way too smart to believe a simple lie like that, but she just nodded her head and sat down on her chair. She didn’t even stop to hug her mother like she usually did, so Felicity shot Oliver a worried gaze, and he mouthed, “Tired.”

Felicity nodded, taking the bowl with Tommy’s puree that Oliver held out for her and starting to feed her son. The little boy was eager to hold the spoon himself, but Felicity didn’t let him. Tommy had just as much fun throwing food around like Emmy had had when she had been his age, so obviously letting him hold the spoon was obviously a mistake when she wasn’t willing to spend an hour cleaning the kitchen after.

Again Tommy tried to get the spoon, but Felicity shook her head, saying, “No, Tommy. Not today.”

Tommy released a cry of discontent, pushing Felicity’s hand with the spoon away in protest. The movement made some of the puree drop down onto the small table of the high chair, and immediately Tommy started playing with it. Felicity sighed. Her son usually preferred playing with the food instead of actually eating it.

Oliver, who had sat down to help Emmy with the pasta, had troubles, too. He had put some of the food on the fork, but didn’t get Emmy to eat it. She had her head rested on his shoulder and was rubbing her hands over her tired eyes.

Oliver and Felicity looked at each other. Feeding the kids was rarely easy, but today it seemed particularly exhausting. They could almost see their joint shower receding into the distance and they both sighed in response.

“One more spoon, Tommy,” Felicity asked pleadingly. “One more spoon for mama, okay?”

He didn’t seem to be too interested in the spoon she held out for him, though. Instead he reached out his hands to dip them into the puree, and Felicity had trouble pushing the bowl out of his reach before he could do so.

“Tommy, don’t-“

Felicity’s words were interrupted when Emmy released a high-pitched cry. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she was sobbing loudly.

“Okay, I think someone here needs to go to bed,” Oliver said with a sigh.

Pushing the small bowl with the rejected food away, he pulled Emmy from her chair and into his lap. He whispered something into her ear Felicity couldn’t understand, but even that didn’t help the little girl. She kept crying, turning her face against her father’s chest and forming her hands to fists around the fabric of the apron. She pulled at the fabric, trying to get it over her head. She had probably exhausted herself with the finger paint.

“Come on, I am going to take you to bed,” Oliver suggested, rubbing his daughter’s back comfortingly and kissing her temple.

When Oliver got up from the chair, Tommy stopped trying to grab the bowl from Felicity’s hands and looked at his father and sister instead.

“You wanna say goodnight to Tommy and mommy?” Oliver asked Emmy. Her only answer was a sob followed by a quiet whimper. “I’ll take that as a-“

“Hm-mee!”

Oliver and Felicity both looked at their son with their eyes wide open.

What could have easily been mistaken for a hum followed by another meaningless syllable was definitely Emmy’s name falling from her brother’s lips. To Felicity’s surprise she wasn’t even that disappointed that Tommy’s first word wasn’t ‘mama’. The joy about her baby’s first word meant more to her.

“Hm-mee!” Tommy called out again, pointing at his sister and looking at his mother in question.

Felicity smiled, clapping her hands. “Yes, that’s Emmy.”

“Emmy, you want to kiss your brother goodnight?” Oliver suggested.

Emmy nodded and turned in Oliver’s arm, so she could put her hands to her brother’s cheeks and kiss his hair gently. “Night, Tommy.”

“Mommy, too?” Oliver asked and when Emmy nodded, he leaned forward a little more, so Emmy could kiss her mother over Tommy’s head.

“Night, hon,” Felicity said when Oliver headed to the door.

“Hm-mee!” Tommy exclaimed once more, waving goodbye though it looked more like he was waving to himself. When Emmy and Oliver were out of sight, the little boy looked at his mother. “Hm-mee?”

“Emmy’s tired. Daddy’s putting her to bed,” Felicity explained with a smile. Leaning forward, Felicity kissed the tip of Tommy’s nose and added, “Look, buddy, I accept that you said your sister’s name first, but you gotta promise me that ‘mama’ is going to come before ‘dada’, okay?”

Tommy looked at her, laughing.

“How about we try it?” Felicity asked. “Say ‘mama’.”

But again Tommy only giggled, making Felicity sigh. She just had keep encouraging him.


	127. Missing mommy

When the first thunder rumbled through the quiet of the afternoon, Oliver felt his heart clenching painfully like it was held in a tight fist. Rubbing his hand over the aching side of his chest, he tried to take in a deep breath but felt his throat closing when he tried to do so. He felt like he was suffocating, just like in the night of the storm when the Gambit had gone down and the dark water had pulled him under the surface again and again.

Thunderstorms had always been a weak spot for him. Even years after his return from the five years of hell he had found himself shivering and gasping for air whenever there had been a thunderstorm going on. It had been awhile, though, since he had last felt this stressed about a little change in the weather.

His family always made him feel so safe. Whenever there was a thunderstorm that made him suffer, Felicity just wrapped her arms around him and pressed his head down onto her chest gently, so he could listen to the calming beat of her heart. Even Emmy knew about his trouble with thunderstorms. She always snuggled up to him and sang him a song when she needed it.

Tommy was the only one who was too young to really notice his father’s trouble, and unfortunately today of all days Oliver was left home alone with his not yet one year old son. Felicity had left for work early this morning, and he had dropped Emmy off at her friend Deepa’s place after lunch. So it was only Tommy and him today.

Over the rushing in his ear Oliver could hear his son saying “Momma” over and over and over again. Hm-mee and momma were Tommy’s first two words. He had learned them only two days apart from another, and he seemed to be alternating between favoring them. One day he was saying ‘Hm-mee’ all the time, the other day it was all about ‘momma’. Today was a momma-day. Since Oliver had woken his son up this morning, he had said ‘momma’ at least fifty times already.

Oliver loved hearing Tommy say ‘momma’. He loved the sound of his cute voice saying it. He loved it even more when Felicity heard it because her eyes lightened up every time Tommy was saying it in her presence.

When Oliver felt his tense muscles relaxing at the thought of Felicity, he tried breathing in once more, and closed his eyes in relief when this time it worked. His throat still felt tight, but at least he was able to breathe again. God, how much he would love to call Felicity right now, he thought when the next thunder grumbled through the silence. He knew she was in a very important meeting, though, and he couldn’t call her because he had trouble with a harmless thunderstorm. So Oliver just opened and closed his fist again and again until he felt relaxed enough to head upstairs, following Tommy’s voice.

He found the little boy sitting in front of the closed door to Felicity’s home office. When he saw Oliver stepping closer to him, he reached out his arm, pointing his finger at the door in front of him and asking with a questioning gaze, “Momma?”

“Tommy,” Oliver said with a sigh, doing his best not to flinch at the next flash that was immediately followed by thunder. “Momma’s working. She’s not here.”

“Momma.”

If there was one person who understood the need to have Felicity close, it was Oliver, so his son’s voice asking for his momma made his heart clench almost as painfully as the first thunder today had done. If Felicity was here, she would know how to relax him, so Oliver really understood the need to have her here.

Slowly Oliver got down onto the floor next to his son and stroked his hand over the back of his Tommy’s head. His fingertips played with the short, dark hair for a moment before he lowered his fingers to the nape of Tommy’s neck, tickling his soft skin. It helped him to relax enough for him not to flinch during the next grumbling of the thunder.

Instead of giggling about the caress, though, Tommy released a high-pitched cry of discontent. He slapped Oliver’s hand until Oliver pulled his fingers back and slid a little further away from his father without lifting his diapered butt from the wooden floor.

“Momma,” he said again, pointing at the closed door once more.

“Momma’s working,” Oliver repeated.

“Momma,” Tommy only said again. He turned his head, looking at Oliver with deep blue eyes that filled with tears. “Momma.”

“Come on, we take a look into mommy’s room,” Oliver suggested. “Maybe we feel better when we feel closer to her.”

That being said, Oliver got up on his feet. He reached out his fingers for Tommy, and the young boy grabbed them, getting up on his own feet by pulling himself up. He smiled proudly.

“Yes, you can stand and even walk with help now,” Oliver said encouragingly, but his voice broke at the end when a particularly loud thunder made his chest tightening.

“Momma,” Tommy said again immediately, looking at the closed door in front of him.

Since Tommy refused to let go of Oliver’s fingers, he had to use his chin to press the door handle down and open the door. Immediately Tommy walked in, holding onto Oliver’s fingers tightly. His legs were wobbly and his tread unsure, but he was walking.

“Momma?” he asked again.

“Mommy’s not here.”

“Momma?”

“Tommy, Momma’s at work,” Oliver replied once more.

He crouched down behind his son, pulling his little body between his legs and turning him until he was looking at him with his tearfilled eyes.

“Momma.”

“Come on, we’ll go downstairs and eat something yummy, okay?” Oliver asked and hastily took in a deep breath to keep himself from flinching with the next thunder again. “Momma’s gonna be home soon, and time passes more quickly when we’re eating something yummy. Maybe we could eat yummy apple puree or-“

“Momma!” Tommy cried out.

The sound of his son’s crying voice made Oliver’s heart crack a little, and so did the tears that were now streaming down Tommy’s rosy cheeks. Hastily he lifted his son into his arm, cradling him against his chest and stroking his hand over the boy’s back comfortingly.

“Don’t cry, Tommy,” Oliver whispered, rocking Tommy in his arms slightly. “Daddy’s here, and mommy’s going to be back soon.”

Tommy didn’t stop crying, though, and Oliver wasn’t surprised at all. How was he supposed to spend his son comfort when the thunderstorm outside, that seemed to grow louder and worse, made it almost impossible for himself to even breathe? He needed comfort as much as his son did.

Sighing, he rested his nose against Tommy’s hair, breathing in the scent of his skin, before he whispered, “I miss mommy, too.”

 

 

Hurrying to the front door with her jacket over her head to keep the rain from soaking her hair and clothes, Felicity glanced at her watch shortly. She was home far later than she had hoped for, but she had been stuck in that stupid meeting.

As soon as she had the door unlocked and opened, she dropped her jacket and purse to the floor carelessly. Slipping off her shoes, she called out, “Oliver?!”

He didn’t answer, making curse after curse flash through her mind. Hastily she walked to the living room, trying to find him.

She knew thunderstorms were a weak spot for him. He hated them because they scared him. When they started at night, he always woke up with his clothes soaked with sweat and his chest heaving from erratic breathing. During the day they didn’t bother him that much usually, but Felicity just had a weird feeling. She knew she actually shouldn’t have because Oliver hadn’t called, and he always called when he needed her, but… Felicity just really had a weird feeling.

“Oliver?” she called out again when she had reached the head of the stairs.

When again there was no answer, Felicity felt herself getting more and more nervous. What if the reason Oliver hadn’t called her hadn’t been that he was okay, but that he was not able to call her actually? What if he was sitting in a corner, rocking himself back and forth while desperately trying to hold on?

She should have interrupted her meeting and called him, Felicity cursed herself. She should have called and made sure that he was okay. Since it had been only Tommy and him, she should have called in case it was that bad. If Emmy had been here, Felicity knew her three-year-old would have called. Emmy was smart. She knew what to do if her daddy really wasn’t feeling okay. Tommy was way too young for this, though.

Felicity had the door handle already in her hand, ready to open the door and come rushing into the bedroom, when she heard Oliver’s soft voice whispering. She stopped, leaned closer against the door until her ear almost rested against the wood and listened to his voice.

For a short second Felicity wondered if Oliver was talking in Russian because she barely understood what he was saying. When she overheard him saying “…can be used to perform tasks which require direct access to hardware facilities but still provide higher-level control structures and error-checking”, though, Felicity frowned. That wasn’t Russian. That sounded a lot like IT. Frowning, she just stayed where she was, continuing to listen.

“Okay, maybe that’s not the most interesting thing to read out to you,” Oliver said with a sigh. “Come on, I show you something really cool. Remember what I read out to you about binary, that special language mommy uses?”

“Momma.”

Felicity felt her heart warming at the sound of her little boy’s voice. She loved hearing him say ‘momma’. It was one of her most favorite sounds in the world.

“Right, momma’s special language,” Oliver confirmed. “See this? This is your name in momma’s special language.”

Oliver using binary code to write their son’s name? The thought made her curiosity win out over whatever had kept her in front of the door, just listening.

Smiling, Felicity took in the picture in front of her. Oliver lay sprawled out on their bed with her tablet in his right hand. Tommy lay snuggled up to Oliver’s right side. His arms were put between Oliver’s arm and chest. His head rested on top of his own arms with his face turned towards the tablet. His eyes watched the numbers there closely.

When Oliver caught her moving from the corner of his eye, he turned his head. He smiled at her for a long moment, not saying a word like he knew she needed to enjoy the sight a little longer. Only when Felicity smiled back contently, did he switch off the tablet.

“Look, who’s home,” he prompted Tommy before the little boy could complain about the tablet being switched off.

Tommy sat up, turning his head.

“Momma!” he called out, crawling across the bed towards her immediately.

Felicity stepped forwards and lifted him right in time before he would have crawled off the bed and fallen to the floor. In his joy about his momma being back home, his eyes had been all on her instead of on where he was crawling.

“Hi, Tommy,” Felicity said, lifting her son into her arms.

Tommy hugged her tightly. His little arms came to wrap around her neck, and he snuggled his head to her chest under her chin. She could hear him yawn, so she rubbed her hand over his back calmingly.

“Are you tired, baby?”

“I bet he is,” Oliver replied. “We skipped napping today.”

“What? You do this?” Felicity asked.

Tommy giggled, leaning back in her arms. He looked at her with tired eyes, and Felicity almost expected him to just fall forward back into her arms and fall asleep. Instead he put his hands to her cheeks, nuzzled her nose with his and pressed his lips to hers in a soft kiss.

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered with a smile while Tommy was already snuggling his head back to her chest.

Felicity sat down on the edge of the bed, put her legs to the mattress with a sigh and turned onto her side, facing Oliver. When she rested Tommy down onto the mattress, the little boy snuggled closer to her once more, making sure his momma wouldn’t leave his side while he would fall asleep. He was already breathing deeply and evenly, probably close to falling asleep.

“How was your day?” Oliver asked when Felicity had found a comfortable position. He reached his hand out for her face and tugged a strand of her hair out of her face and behind her ear. The tips of his fingers moved from her ear down over her cheek to her mouth. His thumb grazed her bottom lip shortly before he pulled his hand back.

“Exhausting,” Felicity replied, eying his face up closely. “Yours? You look tired.”

“Well, no napping,” Oliver answered with a chuckle. Felicity knew he wanted to leave it like that and not say anything else, but she knew there was more behind his words, so she looked at him until finally he sighed and added, “The thunderstorm caught me off guard.”

“Why didn’t you call?”

“I didn’t want to bother you. You were working. Besides,” Oliver hastily added when Felicity was about to say something. “I found a way to make myself feel better, and it helped Tommy, who missed you like crazy today, too.”

Oliver moved the tips of his fingers over the back of Tommy’s head gently. Immediately he turned in his mother’s arms and grabbed his father’s finger, holding it in a tight grip while continuing to sleep.

“So what did you do?” Felicity asked after awhile.

“I read out articles about computer programming to Tommy and showed him how the binary code worked. It helped both of us,” Oliver explained and pressed a gentle kiss to Tommy’s forehead.

“You…” Felicity started, not knowing what to say. She had taught Oliver how the binary code worked, but she hadn’t been sure if he had really got it. Actually she had assumed that he had barely been able to listen because she knew how turned on he was when she talked technology. At least if he wasn’t confused. “How did that help?”

Smiling, Oliver moved his fingers away from the back of Tommy’s head and to Felicity’s cheek. He rested his hand against her cheek, stroking his thumb over the soft skin that covered her cheekbone.

“It reminded us of you,” Oliver replied, “and that made us feel better. I mean… I know Tommy doesn’t understand what I told him, but I think he still knew it was your thing.”

Felicity smiled. “It is a little sappy-“

“I always get sappy when you’ve been away for too long.”

“-but very cute.”

“Well, I am doing my best,” Oliver replied with a teasing grin, “though I prefer to be described as very hot and manly.”

Felicity chuckled. “I would, but I am too tired to your reaction of me saying that.”

Oliver smiled. “I’m tired, too.”

“So we’ll just sleep?”

“Sounds great,” Oliver answered, his eyes already closing. “I’m so tired.”

“Me, too,” Felicity replied.

Her eyes were burning with the need to close, but she kept them open to look at Oliver. When his facial expression relaxed, Felicity smiled. She knew how hard thunderstorms could be for him, but she was glad that he had found something that helped himself calming down.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked without opening his eyes.

“Hm?”

“Stop staring at me.”

“Sorry,” Felicity said.

She hastily closed her eyes, not seeing that it was now Oliver smiling. He opened one eye to look at Felicity shortly, then fell asleep before his eye was closed again.


	128. Listen to me babble

Putting on her industrial piercing and walking down the stairs hurriedly, Felicity cursed herself for not getting ready sooner. The first guests would arrive soon, and there was still so much more to prepare. Her baby boy’s first birthday, and she was completely messing it up because she had got distracted by something Felicity wasn’t even sure-

Her thoughts as well as her feet came to a sudden stop when Oliver stepped to the foot of the stairs. He leaned his arm on the banister and cocked his head, looking at her with that one special gaze she had hoped for when she had picked the dress. It made her heart skip a beat before it quickened and started pounding wildly against her ribs.

How come he could still make her feel like this? Shouldn’t the times of being madly and head over heels in love with each other have ended already? Who felt like this after more than four years of marriage and two children?

They kept looking at each other for a long moment, just smiling. Felicity felt her skin tingling in the best way. Her smile widened when she started walking down the rest of the stairs. Before she reached the foot though, Oliver caught Felicity with his arms around her waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck while Oliver was pulling her closer against his chest until her feet were dangling several inches above the floor.

“Nice dress,” Oliver said with a smile, tightening his arms around her body.

“Nice dress shirt,” Felicity replied, smiling back at him.

“You think?”

“Hm,” Felicity hummed.

She lowered her head, smiling into the brush of her lips against his before she closed her eyes and kissed Oliver gently. Their lips touched without any pressure, softly moving against each other’s. When Oliver’s lips opened to hers, their tongues meeting in a slow dance, Felicity sighed quietly. This just felt like heaven, maybe even a little bit better.

When their lips parted, Felicity rested her forehead against Oliver’s for awhile, not saying a word. She knew that she still had a lot to prepare, but she didn’t want to let go of Oliver just yet. These last months had been so crazy full of work; she just needed a moment for only the two of them right now.

“Do you know what I like most about your dress shirt?” Felicity asked when she leaned her head back slightly, so she could look at Oliver.

“Tell me.”

“That I will rip it off your chest as soon as our guests have left and the kids are in bed,” Felicity replied, winking at him.

“Ugh!” she heard Roy say from the living room, followed by Thea’s outcry, “Gross!”

Felicity’s eyed widened, and she moved in Oliver’s arms until he put her back down on her feet. Hastily smoothing out the inexistent creases from her dress, she hissed at Oliver, “Why didn’t you tell me that Roy and Thea were here already?”

“Because that way I wouldn’t have gotten that really nice kiss,” Oliver replied.

He winked at her before she turned around, and just when she was about to head to the living room, he slapped her butt playfully like he loved to do.

“Be careful, mister, or you won’t have a hand to do that much longer,” Felicity warned him, but Oliver only chuckled, heading to the kitchen.

She shook her head with an amused smile before crossing the living room and stepping out on the terrace. Thea and Roy had already taken their seats at the table. Tommy was sitting on Thea’s lap, playing with her necklace, while Emmy was kneeling on Roy’s thighs and playing with his hair. She just loved playing with hair lately. Felicity smiled at the sight.

“Hi, guys,” Felicity said. “You’re early.”

“We thought we’d come early and try to stop the two of you from letting everyone walk in on you having s-e-x when they come here for Tommy’s birthday party,” Thea replied without hesitation, grinning teasingly. “I think we’ve all seen enough of the two of you naked for a lifetime.”

“Please don’t remember me,” Roy asked with playfully strained voice. “I still have nightmares without daily reminders.”

Felicity pursed her lips, stopping herself from replying to that in any way. She knew Thea was actually right. Oliver and she had been caught having sex a lot over the years, so she deserved the teasing. Didn’t mean she particularly liked it, though, Felicity thought when she sat down on the chair opposite from Roy.

“Did my dearest husband ask what he can get you to drink already?”

“Your dearest husband did, and already took care of the orders,” Oliver replied before Thea or Roy got the chance to.

“Isn’t he great?” Felicity asked, smiling up at Oliver teasingly while he placed the things he had brought from the kitchen on the table.

When Oliver winked at her, Roy groaned. He then lowered his lips to whisper something into Emmy’s ear, and the three-year-old sat down on Roy’s lap, resting her back against his chest, before she stated towards her parents, “Roy wants you to kiss.”

“Hey, that’s not what I told you to say,” Roy complained.

“I know,” Emmy replied, turning her head, so she could grin at him, “but daddy likes kissing mommy.”

“Daddy really does,” Oliver confirmed, and emphasized the statement by lifting Felicity’s chin and kissing her gently.

“Ugh, better cover your eyes, Tommy,” Thea said, and when Felicity opened her eyes after the kiss and looked at her sister-in-law, she saw her holding Tommy’s little hands in front of his eyes, making him giggle. “You’re too young for this.”

“I don’t think anyone is too young to see what true love is,” Oliver said.

“Hubby, I’d appreciate a little less talking and a little more pouring drinks. Mommy’s thirsty,” Felicity said hastily, stopping Oliver from saying anything even kitschier and putting off their first guests before the party had really started yet. When she noticed that Oliver had only brought two wine glasses for Thea and her and a bottle of beer for himself, she turned to Roy. “What about you? Did my superhubby forget to offer you a drink?”

“Nope,” Roy replied while Oliver pinched Felicity into the side playfully. “I’m fine for now.”

“You’re sure?” Felicity asked, slapping Oliver’s hand away when he tried to pinch her once more. “No beer?”

“I’ll drive, so better not,” Roy said, looking at Thea. “The things I do for you…”

Felicity nodded, looking at Thea. “We are lucky girls with our men.”

“We are, aren’t we?” Thea replied, raising her glass to Felicity.

Felicity took a nip of her white wine, enjoying the fruity taste. The cold liquid felt good running down her throat, especially in contrast to the warm air around her. The sun was prickling on her skin, making her feel comfortable but slightly sweaty. Well, she has asked for warmer weather, she wouldn’t get to complain about it now.

“Oh, Roy!” Felicity said excitedly, putting her glass back on the table. “I know just the right thing that should make up to you for staying sober today for your girlfriend.”

“Shoot,” Roy said.

“You should try my juices.”

Thea almost spit her wine across the table, then started coughing wildly. Roy’s head turned red, and he perked up his eyebrows, his eyes shortly seeking out Oliver’s. When Felicity saw Oliver reaching out a hand to put on her shoulder, she slapped it away without looking at him.

“I know, I know,” she said to Roy and Thea. “We’re turning into one of those boring couples, but you should really try them.”

“Felicity,” Oliver said right next to her, once more trying to reach out his hand for her shoulder, but again she slapped it away without looking at him.

“Oliver loves my juices. If it was up to him, he wouldn’t live on anything else, but honestly I have other things to do than satisfy his needs all day.”

“Felicity,” Oliver said in the same warning tone once again.

“He’s going to argue that he doesn’t like them, but it’s only because he doesn’t want to share. He thinks they are delicious. He told me all day yesterday, and-“

“Felicity.”

“-he let out this quiet moan when he tasted them because they really are just that good. Come on, Roy! We go to the kitchen, and you can try them right there and-“

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” Oliver interrupted her in the usual singsong he used to say her name so often. As soon as she had gotten up, he had wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled her against his body, so her back was resting against his chest.

“Oliver, you’re not going to keep me from letting Roy try my-“

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered, lowering his lips, so they were brushing against her ear. His voice sounded slightly husky, making a comfortable shiver run down the length of her spine. “Let me try your juices.”

“Oh god, Oliver! We have guests,” Felicity said.

She slapped his hands away from where they had rested on her stomach, and she turned around to slap his chest, too. When she looked into his face, though, and noticed the way he was looking at her, she realized what was going on. Feeling herself blushing already, she hastily turned back to Roy and Thea with her eyes wide open.

“Oh my god!” she gasped out, shaking her head. “No, no, no. I wasn’t- I didn’t meant to- I mean I would never- I was just trying to offer some of my juices in the kitchen. Okay, no! This didn’t make it better. He should try my juices… the juices I made for Tommy’s birthday… juices from fruits… like... orange juice and tomato juice and apple juice and-“

“Mommy, take a breath,” Emmy prompted with a quiet giggle, leaning her back against Roy’s chest. Luckily, she was too young to know what her mother had just said.

Felicity took in a deep breath, trying to calm down. She bit down on her bottom lip firmly to prevent herself from saying anything more that could be misunderstood. She really had only wanted to offer Roy a drink, but of course her brain had to think about the worst way to say things.

When the bell rang, Felicity hastily stepped out of Oliver’s arms.

“I’ll better go before I’ll say anything even more embarrassing.”

Maybe she should just sew up her lips like that freaky guy they had chased once had done. It really would save her a lot of embarrassing moments. She would have to seriously consider that option once more.


	129. Just in time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sinceriouslybea said: Hi lovely! Hope you’re well. ❤️ I don’t know if your taking prompts at the moment but I’d love to send you one anyway. Felicity has a seriously bad allergic reaction, while alone with the kids. Oliver arrives at some point and has to treat his wife and comfort his traumatized kids. Sorry but I was feeling slightly evil today haha

“Mommy, where’s my coloring book?”

“Mama. Mama. Mama.”

“Mommy, I can’t find it!”

“Mama. Mama. Mama.”

“Mommy! Where is it?”

Felicity sighed and closed her eyes with a shake of her head. The morning had been crazily exhausting. First electricity had failed for almost three hours, not allowing her to serve her kids an appropriate breakfast. After that she had realized that she had missed reading an important contract for her first meeting tomorrow, forcing her to work through it on her Sunday morning, and then Emmy had spent the last hour telling her that she was bored.

So much about enjoying a lazy Sunday morning with her babies!

“Mommy!” Emmy called out with a frustrated screech.

It was followed by Tommy’s quieter, monotonous, “Mama. Mama. Mama.”

Only five minutes ago Emmy had finally decided that she could chase away her boredom by coloring until Felicity had the meal Oliver had prepared for them reheated. So Emmy had left the kitchen to go to the living room where Felicity was sure she had seen her daughter’s coloring book the last time. Tommy had followed his sister, crawling to the living room right after her.

Felicity glanced at her watch, sighing contently at the realization that Oliver should be home soon. If he hadn’t been stuck in traffic, he would have actually been home from his visit to Central City already.

“Mommy!”

Emmy’s screech ended in a sob, making Felicity sigh. The three-year-old hadn’t slept much last night. She had face-timed with Oliver until far past midnight when Felicity had finally stated that it was enough and time for all of them to go to bed and catch some sleep. Emmy, who had been allowed to sleep in her parents’ bed because Felicity didn’t like sleeping there alone, had kept talking to her mother for two more hours, though. Felicity had told her to continue telling her everything that was on her mind the next day because she needed to sleep now, but Emmy had claimed that she wasn’t tired at all. Still, she had fallen asleep mid-sentence only a few minutes later.

“Mommy.”

Felicity turned her head to the door, watching Emmy stepping into the kitchen and approaching her. She rubbed her hands over her eyes that were filled with tears, and as soon as she had reached her mother, she hid her face against her hip, wrapping her arms around one of Felicity’s legs like Tommy usually did.

“Mommy,” she whined.

Her voice was muffled by Felicity’s sweater, but it didn’t lack her frustration and tiredness. Sighing, Felicity stroked her hand through her daughter’s curly hair.

“The meal daddy made for us is almost ready. Do you want to set the table?”

Emmy shook her head, pressing her face closer to Felicity’s hip. “I want to color.”

“You need to find your coloring book then.”

“I can’t find it,” Emmy whined with another sob.

Felicity sighed quietly. She was terribly hungry, but she knew if she didn’t find Emmy’s coloring book, Emmy wouldn’t eat a bite. And then she’d be grumpy all day. And grumpy Emmy was not something she wanted to deal with today.

“Come on, I’ll help you looking for it,” Felicity suggested, turning off the stove with a sigh.

“Really?”

“Yes, but we gotta hurry. Mommy’s a little hungry, and Tommy needs to be put in bed for his nap in time.”

“He starts crying when he isn’t.”

“Very right,” Felicity replied. When Emmy looked at her, Felicity dried her daughter’s cheeks from the tears that had fallen. “You go and look for the coloring book already. I’ll be right there.”

“Okay,” Emmy said, turning on her heels and running towards the door where she ran into Tommy, who seemed to have crawled after her once more. “Come on, Tommy. We go back!”

Immediately Tommy sat down on his thanks to the diaper well-padded butt and turned around on it. Giggling in amusement, he followed his sister back into the living room then. Felicity shook her head with a smile. Her kids could easily drive her crazy, but they could make her smile just as easily.

“Mommy, I really can’t find it!” Emmy called out from the living room.

Felicity didn’t miss the already again increasing frustration in her daughter’s voice. So she pushed the pot with the food from the hot stove plate and headed to the door. On her way she grabbed the chocolate bar Tommy had neglected earlier, and took a bite. It wasn’t enough to chase away her hunger, but it should be enough to pass the time until they would eat the food that was waiting on the stove.

She hadn’t even put a foot into the living room when she saw the coloring book already, peeking out from under one of the pillows on the couch. Felicity leaned into the door to the living room, watching her daughter looking for the coloring book everywhere but under the pillows. Tommy was meanwhile sitting next to the couch table on the floor, chewing on the remote contently.

“Mommy, you wanted to help.”

“Oh, I know,” Felicity replied. She had to clear her throat, feeling a weird itching there, before she continued, “Actually I found it already.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” Felicity said with a chuckle at her daughter’s unbelieving voice. “I give you a-“

She needed to stop herself when she felt the itching in her throat increasing. She coughed, hoping to get rid of it, but it seemed to only make it worse.

“Emmy, I’m going to get a glass of water. I’ll be right back,” Felicity explained, not missing how she sounded terribly husky.

On her way back to the kitchen, she put her hand around her throat, wondering if it was swollen because it felt like that, and it seemed to be getting worse quickly. Hastily downing a cold glass of water, her gaze flickered over the discarded paper of the chocolate bar, and when Felicity felt her throat growing even tighter, she knew exactly what it was coming from.

 

 

Oliver stretched his aching muscles once he made it out of the car. All he had wanted, after his flight from Central City where he had visited William had landed, had been getting home to Felicity, Emmy and Tommy quickly, but the busy traffic had made it take longer.

He had missed them like he always missed them when he visited William alone. He had thought about taking Emmy and Tommy with him like he had done a few times already, but he had decided against it. He couldn’t take the kids to Central City every other weekend, especially because it meant leaving Felicity alone.

The situation still was complicated. He had asked Samantha about allowing Felicity to meet William several times now, but she hadn’t changed her mind yet. Oliver didn’t know what he’d do if Felicity ever lost her understanding or patience. It had been awhile since he had last felt like this, but lately old thoughts were creeping up to him more often again. One of them was definitely that Felicity was too good for him. She had always been too good for him.

Sighing, Oliver shook his head to get rid of the thought. His eyes stayed focused on the front door, expecting someone of his family to welcome him back home with an excited screech of joy and a bear hug or at least some show of affection. The door stayed closed, though.

They were probably eating lunch, Oliver thought with the umpteenth sigh today. If the traffic hadn’t been that horrible, he would have come home before lunch time and would have hopefully gotten the welcome he thought was appropriate for someone who had been given several well-deserved world’s-best-daddy-items.

Well, he might have to meet his family half way. Oliver took his bag from the trunk and headed to the door. He tried to move as slowly as possible, giving his loved ones the time to check if the sound of a trunk being closed might mean daddy was home, but apparently his family just didn’t want to welcome him home the way he would love them to.

When he opened the front door and still nobody came running into his arms, Oliver frowned. He might have to sit his family down and have a serious talk to them about how he expected to be welcomed home. He need them to put some more effort in making him know how much they had missed him, he thought with a smile when he put his bag next to the foot of the stairs.

“Guys?!” he called out when even the loud sound of his bag falling to the ground didn’t get any reaction. “I’m home!”

“Daddy!”

Immediately Oliver dropped his keys to the floor and started running to where his daughter’s screech had come from. He had wanted her to welcome him back home with a screech, but he had wanted it to be a screech of joy. Her voice had sounded terrified, though.

Oliver found his suspicion that something was wrong confirmed when he reached the kitchen. Emmy was crouching under the table with both of her arms wrapped around Tommy, who struggled to get out of her arms. Tears were streaming down her face, sobs escaping her lips. She looked just as terrified as her screech had sounded.

Without second thought Oliver rushed towards her. He kneeled down right in front of his crying daughter, putting a hand to the back of her head and moving his fingers through her curly hair. “Emmy, what-“

He interrupted his own words when he heard a desperate gasp for air not far away from him. He turned his head and felt his heart stop beating in response to what he saw. Felicity was lying on the floor. Her eyes were widened. Her panicked gaze was directed at the ceiling. She was barely breathing, obviously having trouble to force air into her lungs.

For a long moment that his body seemed to be in deep shock Oliver felt unable to move. He had seen Felicity having bad allergic reactions before, but it had never been like that. Yes, she had had trouble breathing. He had never seen her lying on the floor as helpless as she seemed to be now, though. He had never seen her like that, and he felt just as terrified by this as Emmy seemed to be.

“Daddy!”

His daughter’s cry seemed to snap him back to the situation at hand. He quickly got up and ran to Felicity, putting one hand to her pale cheek. She looked at him in panic, gasping for breath once more.

“Felicity, where is your EpiPen?” he asked as calmly as he was able to.

Felicity gasped for air once more. She moved her lips like she was trying to answer, but no sound could be heard. She looked at her right hand for a short moment before she looked back at him again and finally at her right hand once more. Oliver’s eyes followed her gaze to her hand, finding it clenched around something. Quickly he took it from her hand.

Benadryl. It was what she took for light allergic reactions. This didn’t look like a light allergic reaction at all, though. She must have taken it to get through until she found her EpiPen.  

“I’m going to find it, okay?”

He was already quickly getting up from the floor again, jumping over Felicity’s body. He tore open the doors of the kitchen cabinets, looking for that pen desperately. They always saved several of them here in case of emergency, but he just couldn’t find them.

“Felicity, where the hell are they?!” he asked in panic.

Emmy released a loud cry. Oliver knew in the back of his mind that the impatient, panicked tone of his voice didn’t help making it easier for the toddler. How was he supposed to calm down when his wife was close to suffocating, though?

“Emmy?”

Oliver did his best to keep his voice as calm as possible. It wasn’t easy, though. His heart was beating quickly. His hands were shaking so wildly, it was getting more difficult to continue opening the doors of the cabinets and move the things in it to check if he could at least find one EpiPen.

“Emmy?” Oliver asked again when his daughter didn’t react. “How does that song go again? _The people on the bus go up and down, up and down, up and down. The people-_ “

“- _on the bus go up and down all around the town_ ,” Emmy joined in before she took in a sniffling breath, tightening her arms around her whining baby brother.

“Keep singing,” Oliver suggested.

Only distantly did he hear her small voice, singing that song. Her singing couldn’t calm him down. He was too panicked because he just couldn’t find that EpiPen! He needed that damn pen! If he didn’t find it- Oliver didn’t even want to think about what would happen if he didn’t find it soon.

When he slammed the door to the last cabinet shut loudly, he heard Emmy gasping frightened.

Quickly he kneeled down next to Felicity, once again putting a hand to her cheek. The color of her face had turned into a deep red. Her gasps for air were growing more desperate. A single tear had escaped the corner of her eye and was rolling down her cheek.

“Hold on, okay?! Just hold on. I will back.” He quickly got up, running out of the kitchen. He only turned his head to look back over his shoulder to the kids. “Emmy, please keep singing that song for mommy. _The wiper on the bus goes-“_

He didn’t know if she kept singing. Oliver could only hope so, knowing it would calm herself and her brother down. Maybe it would even give Felicity a reason to hold on longer. God, she needed to hold on!

How long had she been lying there already, gasping for air without anyone there to help her?

Oliver ran up the stairs and into their clothing room as quickly as possible. He opened the closet with Felicity’s purses and started emptying their contents on the floor. It wasn’t until he had grabbed the third purse that he finally found what he had been looking for all along.

Quickly he grabbed the EpiPen and started running back downstairs into the kitchen.

“I got it!” he shouted, interrupting Emmy’s singing. He kneeled down next to Felicity and applied the epinephrine into her thigh without hesitation. He threw the empty pen into the sink and sat down on the floor, suddenly feeling terribly exhausted. He leaned over Felicity’s face, kissing her forehead and stroking his hands over her cheeks. Quietly he whispered, “It’s okay. You’re gonna be okay. You just need to breathe. Just breathe.”

Felicity looked at him, taking in deep even if still struggling breaths.

“There you go,” he whispered with a smile and kissed her forehead once more. “Good. Very good.”

When Oliver leaned back again, he saw Felicity’s eyes looking at where Emmy and Tommy still cowered under the table. Emmy was rocking back and forth, taking Tommy with her. She still seemed more than terrified.

“Emmy,” Oliver said gently, reaching out one hand for her. “Emmy, sweetie, come here.”

Emmy shook her head, tightening her hold on Tommy, who seemed to grow more and more dissatisfied with being held in place.

“You don’t have to be scared anymore, Emmy. Mommy’s fine.”

“’m fine,” Felicity chocked out, and Oliver glanced at her shortly with a smile of relief.

Emmy stayed where she was, though, shaking her head with quiet tears streaming down her face. Oliver looked down at Felicity for a short moment before he leaned down slowly and pressed another kiss to her forehead. He gave her a long look, waiting until she nodded, before he took his hands off her face and crawled closer to Emmy.

“Come here, sweetie,” he whispered.

The toddler was shaking her head, but Oliver still pulled the children into his arms and against his chest. Emmy’s fist tightened in the fabric of his shirt immediately. She pushed herself even closer to him, crawling into his comforting embrace.

“It’s okay now,” he whispered. He pressed kisses to the kids’ heads, breathing them in. “It’s okay. Mommy’s going to be okay. Mommy’s okay.”

 

 

Felicity woke up to gentle lips pressing to her forehead. Sighing, she opened her eyes and found Oliver sitting on the edge of the mattress. He was looking at her with a soft smile. Blindly she reached out her hand for his and entangled her fingers with his.

“How long did I sleep?” she asked in a whisper.

“Five minutes.”

“Oh. It felt so much longer,” Felicity replied with a frown, making Oliver chuckle.

She took a quick look around the hospital room. She had told Oliver that she didn’t need to go to the hospital, but he had insisted on calling an ambulance and getting her here nonetheless. She knew that it had been necessary, but she just didn’t like being here.

“Has Thea taken the kids to the cafeteria?”

“No, she took them home with her.”

Felicity sighed. “Yes, might be for the better. We can pick them up when we go home later today. The doctor said I can leave around seven when everything is alright.”

Oliver cleared his throat, making her perk up her eyebrow in question. He pressed his lips together before he replied, “I asked him to keep you here until tomorrow.”

“Oliver,” she said with a sigh.

“I know, I know,” he was quick to say. “I just- I would feel safer, so… please?”

Felicity sighed once more. “You know I can’t say no when you look at me like that.”

Smiling triumphantly, Oliver leaned forward and pecked her lips shortly. “Thank you.”

Felicity grumbled. She hated hospitals. She didn’t get how anyone could assume that someone would heal in here. And she had to stay here although she wasn’t sick! She hated it. She knew that Oliver needed it, though.

“How was your weekend with William?” Felicity asked.

Oliver didn’t answer. He just looked at her with dark, tired eyes.

“Felicity, you have to be more careful.”

Felicity sighed once more. “I know. I was just hungry and-“

“You have to _promise_ me that you will be more careful from now on,” Oliver interrupted her, squeezing her hand firmly.

The expression in his eyes was desperate. She knew how urgently he needed her to promise him this. He had lost so many people in his life, and losing her was one of his worst nightmares.

“I promise.”

Oliver looked at her for a moment longer before he nodded slowly, leaving out a sigh. “I should have been there. If I hadn’t been in Central City, but with you where I belong-“

“Hey, don’t go there,” Felicity interrupted him. “You belong to your son in Central City as much as you belong to us. The situation is just-“

“-shitty?”

“-messy,” Felicity replied, cocking her head.

“If I had been there, I could have found the EpiPen sooner, and it wouldn’t have turned so bad in the first place.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Neither do you know that I wouldn’t have been able to.”

Felicity stayed silent. She knew that if Oliver wanted to blame himself for something, she wouldn’t be able to stop him from that. Oliver didn’t blame himself as often as he had done in the past, but sometimes, when it was really bad, he fell back to that old habit.

“Hey,” Oliver said after awhile, calling for her attention. She turned her head to look at him, seeing him smiling at her. “Want to go on a short vacation with me?”

“A vacation?”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied with a smile, “somewhere far away to have a little you-and-me-time.”

“You-and-me-time?”

“Hmhmm,” Oliver hummed with a nod. “Just you and me.”

“What about the kids?”

“They are smart. They will get along without us,” Oliver replied with a wink.

Felicity smiled tiredly. “So where are we going?”

“What if I said that it was a surprise?”

“Well, I’d go anywhere with you.”

“I am glad to hear that,” Oliver said. Leaning forward, he kissed her lips gently before moving his lips across her cheek to her ear. “And I think it would be the perfect time to use one of those envelopes you gave to me on my birthday.”

Felicity grinned. “So you made up your mind on what wishes of your secret sex list you want us to play out?”

“For now, I’ve only decided on one. And for that one we have to go on a vacation.”

“Well, I’m in.”


	130. A favor for a favor

Felicity eyed up her work in the mirror. After more than thirty minutes of trying to create the perfect look for what Oliver and she were going to do today, she was quite satisfied with the result.

The tight leather skirt ended right beneath her butt, perfectly accentuating the curve of it. Her legs looked so much longer with the dark thigh garters and the new high heels she had only bought for this occasion. The neckline of the black lace top revealed enough skin to get fantasies running without showing too much. Her long blonde hair fell down onto her shoulders and back in soft waves. The dark eye make-up made her eyes look like they were almost black.

There was just one detail missing for the perfect look, Felicity thought. She rummaged around in her small purse until she got hold of her lipstick. She applied the deep red color to her lips carefully, making sure that it covered them completely.

“Perfect,” Felicity whispered, eyeing up the femme fatale that was looking back at her in the mirror.

A quick glance at her watch told her that there were five minutes left until she was going to meet with Oliver, so she was perfectly in time. Felicity put the make-up back into her purse before she glanced at herself in the mirror one last time and headed to the door. She stepped into the spacious hotel lobby and headed right to the elevator, trying to keep her hands from tugging at the hem of her skirt that she felt riding further up her body with every step.

Only when the elevator doors closed behind her, locking her alone in the small cab, Felicity allowed her fingers to move to her butt and tuck down the hem until it was back where it belonged. Sighing, she leaned with her back against the cool wall of the cab, pulling the envelope from her purse.

Oliver had made a big secret out of his plan for the fulfillment of his first fantasy. The only thing she had known until yesterday had been that they were going on a short vacation without the kids for a couple of days. He hadn’t even told her where they were going which had made packing everything but easy.

Only during their flight here yesterday, Oliver had revealed his plan for them by handing her the envelope. Felicity took the white card from it like she had done during the flight yesterday and once again read the words Oliver had written on it:

_We’re going to Russia and explore what it would be like if we were both Bratva captains. You will come to me by appointment to ask for a favor, and I will demand a favor back from you.  
Because that is how the Bratva works - a favor for a favor._

Felicity pressed her thighs together. How come that even reading these words was already enough to turn her on beyond belief? Playing this little fantasy of his out would be so, so good.

Putting the card and the envelope back into her purse, Felicity got out of the elevator and walked through the empty hallway towards the hotel suite she and Oliver had shared last night. It was where he was waiting for her to come to him. When she arrived, she stood still in front of the door, moving her hands through her hair shortly.

Taking in a deep breath, she whispered to herself, “Showtime.”

She knocked at the door quietly, leaning against the doorframe. It didn’t take long until the door was opened and Oliver stood only a foot away from her. He eyed her up intensely, and the way his gaze moved over her exposed skin made goose bumps elicit all over her body. Felicity wanted to look at him too, but she knew it would break character for this game if she did so. So she resisted the urge, only looking down his body from the corner of her eyes. That way she could still see enough to know that he was wearing a shirt, dark jeans and boots.

Slowly his gaze traveled back up from her toes to her face. When their eyes met, Oliver cocked his head at her.

“Don’t you want to ask me in?”

“How do I even know you’re the one I was supposed to meet here?”

Felicity released a short chuckle. She had known that he would ask her that. Bratva captains weren’t the most trusting people. Not lowering her gaze from his face, she lifted her hand and pulled the neckline of her top further down, revealing the henna tattoo she had drawn there.

With satisfaction Felicity noticed the surprised look on Oliver’s face. He obviously hadn’t expected her to create a perfect picture of the Bratva star on her skin. Well, Oliver would probably feel surprised more than this one time, Felicity thought.

“Are you going to ask me in now?”

Oliver waited a short moment, just looking at her face with narrowed eyes before he said something in Russian. God, he knew how much she loved hearing him talk in Russian! It just set her libido on fire even more.

Felicity watched Oliver’s face closely before she said, “I can take care of myself. I don’t need anyone for that. Thank you.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows, obviously surprised that her reply worked with what he had said before. He knew she didn’t speak or even understand Russian, but obviously he had underestimated how well she knew him. She had seen in his face that he had said something dangerous, and somehow she had just felt like he might have asked if she hadn’t brought any bodyguards. Obviously that had hit the mark.

“Don’t look so surprised,” Felicity eventually said when Oliver just kept staring at her.

He didn’t open the door further for her, but she didn’t care and just went past him into the suite. She stayed in the middle of the room, turning around to him with her arms crossed in front of her chest. She watched him closing the door and turning around to her before he slowly approached her. He came to stand several feet away from her with his chin lifted and a questioning expression on his face, just looking at her.

“What are you doing here?”

“I need to get rid of someone, and I was told you were the right guy to come and see.”

“Who told you?” he asked back immediately, looking at her suspiciously.

“Anatoly Knyazev,” Felicity responded without hesitation. “He speaks very highly of you.”

“He should. I saved his life.”

“Well, I hope you’re as good at doing the opposite then because like I said I need to get rid of someone. And I don’t like to be disappointed because someone can’t do the job right.”

Oliver looked at her without any muscle in his face moving. Slowly he started approaching her, but instead of just coming closer, he walked around her and eyed her up like a predator its prey. When he stepped back in front of her, he was only a foot away from her. Felicity could even feel his breath ghosting over her face. The gaze of his piercing blue eyes seemed to burn right under her skin.

“Are you going to do the job, Mr. Queen?”

The slightest of a smug grin spread on Oliver’s face. He stepped a little closer, so his chest almost touched her arms that were still crossed on her chest. Slowly she lowered her arms to her sides, never taking her eyes off Oliver.

“I guess whether I get rid of someone for you depends on if you’re willing to do me a favor too.”

Right to the topic, Felicity thought with a smile that she held back by biting her tongue. She licked her lips shortly, noticing the quick look Oliver cast them with a feeling of pride.

“What favor do you demand?” Felicity asked.

Oliver stepped forward, so his chest was now touching her breasts. He lowered his face a little, and Felicity had to hold her breath because the scent of his skin made it hard to concentrate on the fantasy instead of just throwing herself at him.

His eyes were focused on her face intensely when he whispered dangerously quiet, “I want you.”

“Me?” Felicity asked. She had trouble to keep her voice firm because Oliver’s words and the huskiness of his voice made jolts of pleasure run right through her core, forcing her to rub her thighs together. “I am not a trophy you can win at a fairground stall.”

“Well, that’s too bad,” Oliver replied with his voice still lowered. Felicity could barely hear him over the wild beating of her heart and the loud rushing of blood in her ears. “But of course it’s your choice. Just remember that if I don’t get you, you don’t get rid of whoever you want me to take care of for you.”

They looked at each other for a long moment. Felicity didn’t want to give in just yet. Something about this situation was just turning her on too much.

“You have five seconds to decide,” Oliver added with rough voice. “Five… four… three… two… one…”

Quickly Felicity moved her hands to the waistband of Oliver’s pants. She pulled his hips against hers, and Oliver’s lips came crashing down onto hers. The kiss was all teeth and tongue without any finesse, but Felicity didn’t mind. It was just what she needed right now. Oliver’s teeth buried into her bottom lip tugging slightly, and his short stubble scratched the delicate skin of her face.

Felicity’s hands were still fumbling with the buckle of his belt when Oliver took two large steps forwards. Felicity ended up with her back being pressed against the wall and Oliver’s chest leaning close to her front. His hips moved against hers, his harder-growing erection rubbing between her thighs deliciously. His hands meanwhile moved to the outside of her thighs, impatiently pushing the hem of her short skirt up. Felicity had other plans, though.

As soon as she had managed to unbuckle his belt, she pushed his hips away from hers, creating some distance. Oliver’s lips parted from hers, and his eyes opened to look at her.

“Changed your mind?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sheepish grin, unbuttoning his pants and lowering the zipper. “I just like jobs being done properly. Since I expect you to give all of you when you do what I asked you for, I will give all of myself into this. I don’t want to be said against me that I don’t do a job right.”

With that she hooked her fingers into the waistband of his jeans and tugged them over the curve of his butt down his legs. They ended up pooling on the floor, leaving him naked from his hips to his ankles. Obviously he had decided to go commando.

Locking eyes with Oliver, Felicity slowly bent her knees and sank down on the floor in front of him. Her face was on one level with his now rock-hard erection, and she wasted no second to lean forward and take him into her mouth.

“God,” Oliver choked out.

Quickly his right hand came to rest against the wall as his whole body was almost falling forward. Meanwhile his left hand came to rest at the back of her neck, tightly grabbing a strand of her hair to hold onto.

Slowly Felicity leaned further forward, taking him in deeper into her warm mouth. She saw Oliver taking in a hissing breath, struggling to hold on, and she hummed around his cock. The vibrations made him grunt and lean forward more, so his forehead rested against the hand on the wall. His eyes closed.

Felicity bobbed her head up and down his length quickly for a few times. When only the tip was between her lips, she twirled her tongue around it and sucked, earning her another groan and some whispered words in Russian from Oliver.

God, how much she just loved hearing him swear and curse in Russian!

When she hummed once more, Oliver groaned again. It wasn’t his only reaction this time, though. His hip moved forward, making his cock slide deeper into her mouth. Felicity looked up at him, finding his eyes focused on her face intensely. He didn’t need to ask the question she knew he had. She could see it written all over his face. Leaning back a little, she gave him a barely visible nod.

Oliver’s left hand loosened around the strand of hair he had been holding without forcing her to take him in deeper or stopping her from doing so. His fingers massaged the back of her head gently for awhile while his hips were just holding still with only the tip of his cock between her red-painted lips. Slowly he moved his hips forward, sliding into her mouth deeper before pulling back out until again it was only the tip left between her lips. The entire time his eyes stayed locked on hers, eying her reaction up intently to make sure he wouldn’t push in too deep.

He set a slow rhythm of thrusting in and out of her mouth. His hand kept massaging the back of her head in silent thanks without forcing himself deeper into her than she was willing to take. Felicity lifted her right hand to cup his balls, caressing them gently.

Oliver pressed his lips together, releasing a deep groan in response. Soon his thrusts grew shorter and quicker, telling Felicity that he was getting closer to his release.

When it seemed almost unbearable for him to hold on any longer, his hand tightened to a loose fist in her hair again. He pulled his hips back, his cock sliding out of her mouth, and in a quick, fluent movement he lifted Felicity from the floor. Her back pressed against the wall as her body was caged between the wall and his body. Their lips met in a searing kiss.

If Felicity had known what fun ideas Oliver’s list included, she would have given him a lot more envelopes to play those out!

“You’re really good at this,” Oliver growled, his lips lowering to the side of her neck.

“I told you, I always do my jobs right,” she replied.

A quiet moan escaped her lips when Oliver’s hips pressed against hers. He put his hands to the back of her knees and lifted her feet from the floor. She wrapped her legs around his hips, the heels of her shoes pressing into this butt cheeks. The new position made her skirt ride up her thighs and pool around her waist. Oliver’s cock brushed against her naked folds.

When he looked at her in surprise for finding that she had gone commando just like he had himself, Felicity grinned smugly. “What? You thought you were that unpredictable? Guess what, you’re not. You have a certain reputation.”

“Oh, we’re going to see about that,” Oliver replied.

“And how-“

Felicity stopped, gasping for breath when she felt Oliver entering her in one quick, deep thrust. Her arms tightened around his neck. The fingernails of her right hand buried into his scalp, scratching him.

“Has that been predictable?” Oliver growled against the side of her neck.

“Yes,” Felicity lied. Her voice wasn’t louder as a breath. “Very predictable.”

“Hm…” Oliver hummed.

He pressed his lips to her pulse point, sucking the skin into her mouth, certainly leaving a hickey. Felicity meanwhile tried to get Oliver to move, but he stayed unmoving buried inside of her to the hilt. Felicity stopped her anyway ineffective tries to get him to move when she felt Oliver’s teeth scrape over the skin of her neck firmly.

“God,” she moaned, leaning her head back to give him better access.

Oliver took the hint and moved his lips to a lower spot on her neck. For several minutes he just licked, sucked and bit there. Felicity knew it would leave several marks, but she couldn’t care less. She loved carrying his marks on her as stupid as it sounded.

When Oliver slid down the neckline of her top and one cup of her bra, Felicity closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the wall. With quiet moans of pleasures she reacted to the caress of his lips and tongue on her skin. He caressed the Bratva tattoo she had drawn on her skin before he pulled her hardened nipple between his lips, sucking and scraping his teeth over the sensitive skin.

“Yes,” Felicity moaned, biting down on her bottom lip when a long moan escaped her.

It felt so good, and she didn’t want it to stop. She was desperate for friction and desperate for relief, but she didn’t want this moment to ever end.

At home there hadn’t been much time for sex lately. Between her long hours of work, Oliver’s travels to Central City every other weekend and the kids their sex life had been quite limited. They had often found time for sex, but almost just as often it had been lazy sex without much creativity since both of them had been tired. Farther more rather often than not it had ended quickly. This was different, though. Right here, right now they could take the time they needed to carefully explore each other’s body all over again.

Felicity couldn’t take it anymore. The heat that was created by the feeling of Oliver being deep inside of her and his lips being wrapped around her nipple was starting to feel like it was literally burning her and not only metaphorically anymore. She clamped her inner walls down on him. Immediately Oliver’s head fell back to his neck, and he released a dark growl.

“Who’s the one being unpredictable now?” Felicity asked.

Oliver chuckled. “Well, we can at least say that you really are giving all of you into this.”

“I never do jobs poorly.”

“Yeah, I get the impression that you’re right,” Oliver replied. He bent his head forward and gently nibbled at her jaw. When he pulled back to look at her again, he had a smug smile on his lips. “Let’s find out how good you really do the job, hm?”

Without any pause he pulled out and then snapped his hips back against hers, thrusting into her sharply. Felicity hissed, biting down on her bottom lip. Her fingers dug into his shoulders, holding onto him for dear life, when Oliver started setting a fast, deep rhythm.

Felicity loved this position. She actually loved every position because sex with Oliver was always great, no matter how they had sex. She particularly liked being taken by him like this, though. When they showered together in the morning, they always had sex like this. Only that it was slower and gentler.

Oliver’s hips moved against hers relentlessly, hitting just the right spots inside of her. His pelvis rubbed against her clit, setting her skin even more on fire than it already was. Felicity was desperate to hold on just a little bit longer, making the moment last longer, but she felt herself growing impossible close to the edge. So she tightened her legs around his hips, pressing the heels of her shoes more firmly into his butt cheeks.

Oliver’s thrusts were growing quicker, telling Felicity that he was just as close as she was. He started whispering Russian words again, desperately trying to get both of them to their ecstasy.

Felicity lowered her lips to his neck, whispering, “Fuck me harder, Oliver.”

As if he had only waited for her request, he snapped his hips against hers particularly sharp. His skin slapped against hers loudly, and Felicity released a short scream because – God, it just felt so great!

It didn’t take much longer, only a few thrusts more, until Felicity felt the well-known tingle in her toes, telling her that she was right on the edge. She whispered his name quietly – “Oliver” – before she bit down on his skin at the juncture of his neck and shoulder. This way the long, high-pitched scream that would have left her lips otherwise, was muffled against her skin effectively.

Oliver thrust into her twice more before his hips stilled and with a long moan he released his into her. His hand slid from her hips to her back, his arms wrapping around her middle tightly. They were both out of breath with their hearts beating quickly against each other’s chest.

“Satisfied with how I did the job?” Felicity asked.

Oliver chuckled, but it ended in a groan of both of them since it made him move inside of her, so he just took in a deep breath and pressed a kiss to the underside of her jaw.

“More than that,” he whispered against her skin. “Thank you for doing this. I love you.”

“Woah, we just met. You can’t just fall in love with me!”

Oliver chuckled again, regretting it immediately when the friction made their oversensitive bodies react immediately. He carefully slipped out of her, walking them to the bed and lying her down on the mattress.

“Fantasy’s over,” he explained, blanketing her with his body. “Now it’s just us again.”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed, moving her hands up and down his back under the fabric of his shirt. “I liked being a Bratva captain.”

“Well, if you were one and paid everyone with favors like that, you’d certainly be very influential.”

Felicity chuckled. “No, I wouldn’t be because you’d kill everyone.”

“True,” Oliver replied, pressing another kiss to the underside of her jaw. “Thank you for doing this.”

“Oh, my pleasure,” Felicity replied with a vague gesture of her hand. “This was pure fun. Thank God we have a few more days to replay this fantasy again and again.”

“Glad I could meet your taste with my first wish.”

“You do realize we should have used a condom, though, right?” Felicity asked. “I mean… We just met and who knows where your little friend has been before.”

“First of all nothing about my friend is little,” Oliver replied, making Felicity burst out in amused laughter, “and I think we shouldn’t overdo it with the reality of the fantasy.”

Felicity chuckled. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

For awhile they just lay on the bed without saying anything. Oliver rested his ear on top of Felicity’s chest, listening to the beat of her heart. Felicity looked at the ceiling, wishing this moment would never end.

“Do you think we should call your mom and Quentin and hear how the kids are doing?” Oliver asked after awhile, resting his chin on her breast and looking up at her.

Felicity shook her head with a sigh, massaging the back of his neck. “Not yet. I am sure they are getting along perfectly. Emmy and Tommy loved the idea of their mini vacation with granny and grandpa.”

“Emmy didn’t like it that much.”

“She didn’t like it at first,” Felicity corrected.

When they had told Emmy that they were going to go on a short vacation without her and her brother, she had looked at them like they had just told her that Christmas was canceled this year. Felicity and Oliver had tried to make the time with Donna and Quentin tempting for her, but she had only been interested in her parent’s vacation plans. She hadn’t wanted to understand why she shouldn’t go with them. When they had packed, she had even tried to smuggle Tommy and herself into the suitcases.

“How did you get her to accept that she wasn’t coming with us by the way?” Felicity asked.

Oliver had just talked to Emmy when he had taken her to bed that evening, and suddenly she had been okay with not joining them.

“I… uhm… I don’t know… I just… uhm…”

“Oliver?” Felicity said, suspiciously perking up an eyebrow about his stuttered words. “What did you tell our daughter?”

“I… uhm… might have mentioned that… I don’t know… parents… people who love each other… sometimes… need time to make babies…?”

“You what?!”

“It was the only thing that made it acceptable for her,” Oliver replied quickly. “You know her. She is addicted to babies, and she wanted to know why were going alone. When I told her, there was the possibility for another baby in the family, she was gladly going to spend the week without us. She even offered to stay at your mom’s for longer, so we have more time.”

“Oliver,” Felicity groaned. “You know she is not letting this go now until we have another baby.”

Oliver grinned, making Felicity slap his shoulder. He only chuckled in response.

“Come on, another baby would be fun!”

“But not now!”

“Okay, it would be a little bit soon, but…”

He looked at her with a loving expression in his eyes, making Felicity sigh. She put a hand to his cheek, stroking her fingertips through his short stubble.

“Not now,” she whispered.

Oliver propped himself up on his forearms, leaned over Felicity and kissed her gently. He nuzzled her nose when their lips parted and pulled just enough away to look at her.

“You’re right. There’s no hurry,” he explained. When Felicity sighed, relaxing under him, a grin spread on his lips. “By the way, I had to promise Emmy to put some effort into the baby becoming a girl because she knows what it’s like to have a brother, and now she needs to know what it’s like to have a sister. That way she can decide if she wants the baby after that to be a boy or a girl.”

“So you basically promised her two more siblings?”

Oliver opened his mouth to reply though his face revealed that he didn’t really know what to say about that. Felicity perked up her eyebrow interestedly, making Oliver clear his throat. Before he got the chance to make up an answer, there was a light knock at the door, and they both turned their heads.

“Who’s that?” Felicity whispered.

“I don’t know,” Oliver replied honestly, his body tensing above hers. “You go to the bathroom. I will take care of this.”

He pecked the tip of her nose shortly before he rolled off of her. While Felicity quickly walked into the bathroom, Oliver put his pants that were still pooling around his ankles back into place. On his way to the door he glanced at the mirror, and he didn’t miss how he looked like someone who had just had sex. Grinning smugly, he opened the door.

“Anatoly,” Oliver said with a smile.

“Heard my favorite American married couple was here and thought I’d pay them a visit,” the Russian Bratva boss explained, shaking Oliver’s hand firmly.

“Felicity will be more than happy,” Oliver replied, taking a step to the side to allow Anatoly to step into the hotel suite. “Since I told her that we were going back to Russia for a vacation, she has been bugging me about going to see you.”

“She’s a good woman.”

“She’s the best,” Oliver corrected, gesturing to a group of armchairs around a small table.

“I might have a little crush on her.”

Oliver chuckled. “Everyone who knows her has a little crush on her.”

The two men sat down at the table, facing each other. Anatoly looked at his younger friend for a long moment.

“You look different than the last time we met.”

“It’s been a few years,” Oliver replied with a nod of his head, remembering how Anatoly had visited them when Emmy had been only a few months old. “And a lot has happened.”

“Good things, I’d say from what I see.”

Oliver smiled, but he didn’t get the chance to answer because the door to the luxurious bathroom opened.

“Anatoly,” Felicity said, hugging their guest tightly. “I am so glad you’re here.”

“Couldn’t let two of my favorite Americans leave without having seen them,” Anatoly replied, taking Felicity’s hands to spread her arms and look up and down her body closely. It made a dark blush form on her face. “Nice look.”

“Yeah, Oliver and I have-“

“-been to a really long party last night and didn’t get around to change,” Oliver interrupted her before she could accidentally tell their friend about why they had come to Russia, and what they had just been doing here.

They way Anatoly grinned told Oliver that their friend had a good idea of what had been going on here, though.

“I think it’s the perfect timing to tell you that I thought I’d invite you to some glasses of good vodka and great food,” Anatoly suggested. “In case you don’t want to celebrate another party.”

“No,” Felicity replied. “At least not yet.”

“I’ll wait downstairs in the lobby, so the two of you can refresh yourselves,” Anatoly replied, getting up. He walked to the door, turning back around with the doorknob already in his hand. “And then I want to hear everything about my favorite baby Americans – Emmeline and Thomas. Still no strong Russian name, though.”

“Maybe for the next one,” Felicity replied.

Anatoly winked at her and left. Smiling, Felicity turned around to Oliver, but the words she had been about to say got caught in her throat. Oliver had his head cocked, looking at her with a frown on his head.

“What?” she asked.

“So I can’t promise our daughter another sibling, but you can promise our friend a baby with a Russian name?”

“You promised Emmy two siblings,” Felicity corrected. “Besides, you started this.”

“Hm…” Oliver hummed, obviously not knowing what else to say. He stepped closer to Felicity, wrapping his arms around her and making her walk backwards towards the bathroom. His hands lowered the zipper of her leather skirt.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked slowly, cocking her head. “We have a friend waiting for us.”

“I am just helping you undress,” Oliver replied sheepishly.

“Really?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

“Really.”

When her skirt fell to the floor, Oliver grabbed Felicity’s hip and lifted her against him. Her legs came wrapping around his hips.

“And you know what?” Oliver asked, pushing his hands under the fabric of her top. “I think I am also going to help you take a shower.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied, stepping into the bathroom and kicking the door to the suite shut behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the first wish from the list. I still haven't decided on what to write for the other four wishes left, so if you have suggestions, please send them in! :)


	131. Being a parent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short message: This chapter and the next one will be quite short. ;)

“Hey, Emmy, are we going to sent mommy a video before we go to the park?”

“Yes!” Emmy replied immediately.

Oliver hadn’t even pulled his phone from the back pocket of his jeans when the little girl already climbed onto his lap and rested her back against his chest, waiting for the fun to start. Emmy loved sending videos to Felicity, and she loved it even more since Oliver had started doing it on snapchat. She loved playing with the filters.

“Okay, what filter do we want to use?” Oliver asked. “Do we want to use the dogs again?”

“No!” Emmy exclaimed, shaking her head. “Something new, daddy!”

“Something new,” Oliver agreed with a nod of his head, scrolling through the pages of filters.

He had never thought he would ever get something like a snapchat, but he had seen Thea playing around with it and had gotten interested. Luckily, he had a wife who knew everything that had even the slightest thing to do with tech and had introduced him to this world.

Oliver released a quiet sigh. He missed Felicity. Even though he was only spending a weekend in Central City and those few days always passed way too quickly for his liking, it didn’t keep him from missing Felicity. It just sucked being torn between those two places. He wanted to spent time in Central City because William lived here, but he hated that it kept him apart from Felicity.

“Daddy, we gotta send mommy a message before we go to the park!”

Emmy tried to grab his phone and scroll through the filters on her own, but Oliver didn’t give it to her. Instead he shook his thoughts off and returned his attention to his phone. Emmy was right. They needed to hurry because William probably wouldn’t need much time to get Tommy ready for their quick trip to the park, and if they didn’t leave soon, they wouldn’t make it back here for dinner in time.

“What about the one with the flowers here?” Oliver asked.

“No,” Emmy replied, shaking her head. “I want the tiger!”

“The tiger?”

“Yes!” she exclaimed excitedly. “Let’s do the tiger, daddy!”

“You want the tiger, we will do the tiger,” Oliver replied, already clicking on the filter. “Do we need a test run to make sure the message is perfect for mommy? Or do you know already what you want to say?”

“We can’t say anything. We’re tigers!”

“So what are we going to do?”

“Grrrr!”

Oliver chuckled and pressed a kiss to the side of his daughter’s head before he asked, “Ready then?”

“Yes!”

“Okay, three, two, one, action,” he whispered into her ear.

When the video started recording, he expected Emmy to start making sounds of a tiger again, but instead she just looked at the screen, watching her tiger face.

“Grrr!” Oliver made behind her.

Emmy stayed unimpressed for a long moment before she leaned forward, so her face occupied the entire screen, and said, “We miss you, mommy!”

With a low giggle she leaned back against Oliver’s chest and mimicked his sounds with her own “Grrr!” right before the video ended.

“Hey, I thought a tiger couldn’t speak?” Oliver asked Emmy.

The three-year-old rolled her eyes. “It’s just a video, daddy. We’re not really tigers.”

“Of course.” Oliver nodded, trying to hide his amusement. “Do you want to go and check if William and Tommy are ready yet?”

“I bet they aren’t. Boys always need so long,” she explained to him with a seriousness that made him smile even more.

Slowly she slid off his lap and started running to the door where Oliver could hear William asking his little brother to hold still, so he could put on his shoes. It made Oliver smile. William had asked if he could get Tommy ready, proving what Oliver had suggested already. His kids were growing so much closer with every visit here.

Oliver took another look at his phone, checking if Felicity had already messaged him back. Only when he saw that there weren’t any new messages, he pushed his phone into the back pocket of his jeans and got up to walk towards the door.

“Everyone’s ready!” he said with a mixture of surprise and joy. “That’s great! So let’s go, so we will be back in time for dinner and-“

Oliver fell silent when the front door opened and Samantha stepped into her home. She had spent the day working, but since it had been raining most of the day, Oliver had spent the day with the kids here in her house. They had agreed to eat dinner together before Oliver would head to the hotel with Emmy and Tommy. Their flight would leave early tomorrow.

“Hey, are you guys leaving?” she asked.

“Yes, we thought we should take a quick trip to the park before dinner. It finally stopped raining,” Oliver explained.

“I will start preparing dinner in the meantime,” Samantha answered and left towards the kitchen.

“Great. See you later,” Oliver said.

He opened the front door and gestured for his children to get out. Emmy was the first, followed by Tommy, who had his hands tightened firmly around his big brother’s forefingers for balance while walking. He hadn’t taken his first steps on his own yet, but he loved walking with help. He could do nothing else the entire day. Unfortunately all the new impressions that needed to be processed often ended in long crying fits in the night. Oliver couldn’t remember when he had slept through the night the last time. Instead he was holding Tommy for hours, trying to get him to stop crying, so he wouldn’t wake Felicity up.

At the thought of Felicity Oliver turned his head back over his shoulder, looking towards the kitchen.

“Hey, kids, could you hang out in the front garden for awhile? I need to talk to Samantha for a second,” Oliver said.

“But don’t take too long, daddy!” Emmy asked.

“I will hurry.” Oliver looked at William, who had carried Tommy down the stairs from the porch. “Can you keep an eye on them please?”

William tried to hide the proud smile that formed on his lips at his father’s words. Oliver hadn’t misses how much William loved being a big brother. And obviously he enjoyed that his father was leaving him with the responsibility to watch out for his younger siblings.

“I’ll take care they don’t leave the front yard.”

“Great. Thanks,” Oliver hurried to say.

He left the door ajar to make sure the kids could still come back in any time, and he would hear if there was something happening outside.

Oliver walked towards the kitchen, finding Samantha cutting some vegetables with her back turned towards him. He bit his tongue, trying to figure out the right words, but eventually decided that he would just say what he felt he needed to say. So Oliver cleared his throat, making Oliver turn around.

“Hey, did you forget something?” she asked.

“Not exactly,” Oliver explained. He cleared his throat, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “We need to talk.”

“Did something happen?”

“Not… exactly,” Oliver answered once more. “I just think we need to talk about the current situation and how much longer it’s supposed to stay like this with me traveling here every other weekend.”

Samantha put the knife aside and leaned back against the edge of the kitchen counter. She took in a deep breath, looking at the floor for a long moment before she looked up at Oliver again.

“I know this isn’t easy.”

“Understatement,” Oliver simply replied. “She almost died a few weeks ago.”

“Look, I know how hard-“

“No, you don’t,” Oliver interrupted her in a whisper, shaking his head. “You don’t know what it’s like to come home to your wife lying on the floor and being close to choking to death.”

Oliver felt a cold shiver running down the length of his spine, reliving through the memory. He had been so scared of losing her. The kids, especially Emmy, had been terrified. And he hadn’t been able to shake off the feeling that if he had been there that day, none of this would have happened. Felicity wouldn’t have almost choked to death, and she wouldn’t have been forced to stay in a hospital for a night.

Oliver hadn’t been there, though, because he had been here. And if he had only come a few minutes later, Felicity might have died.

“I’m sorry,” Samantha said. “I really am. You’re probably right, and I can’t say how hard that has been for you. The thing is just that… This isn’t exactly easy for me either. I know it might not be comparable, but… I let you in on William’s life, and that has been a big step for me. Now he knows your kids, and that is great. I just…”

“Felicity is a nice person,” Oliver said. “She’s the best person I know actually. And it’s been months now.”

“I know,” Samantha replied quickly. “I know that. It’s just that… Okay, I know this isn’t fair, but I don’t have the best experience with women in your family.”

Oliver bit his tongue so firmly, he was almost sure he would start bleeding. Of course Samantha had trust issued given what his mother had done years ago, but Felicity wasn’t Moira, and making her or him pay for what his mother had done just really wasn’t fair.

“Felicity stood up against my mother,” Oliver explained. “She told me that my mother lied to me about something huge although my mother threatened her that I would hate her if she did so. Felicity is nothing like my mother. She is going to be great with William.”

Samantha just looked at him, shrugging her shoulders almost desperately.

“I guess that’s a no then. You’re right by the way,” Oliver said, shaking his head and turning his back towards Samantha, “this really isn’t fair.”

“Oliver,” Samantha quickly said when he was already heading to the door. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, that doesn’t help me right now;” Oliver just grumbled.

How long much longer were they supposed to continue like this? How much longer was he going to keep traveling to Central City every other weekend, sometimes even taking the kids and leaving Felicity alone in Starling? How much longer would he have to feel like he was actively shutting Felicity out from an important part of his life? And how much longer was she going to be patient about this?

When Oliver stepped out on the porch, he slammed the door shut behind him loudly. Immediately all three kids’ heads turned towards him.

“Sorry,” he hurried to say.

He forced himself to a smile he knew looked everything but convincing. Yet he quickly walked down the few steps in front of the house to where William was standing with Tommy. He picked his younger son up and lifted him into his arms, kissing his cheek.

“We can go now,” Oliver stated.

Emmy was quick to run ahead, already discussing with herself what she wanted to do at the playground. Oliver, Tommy and William followed her, William right next to his father.

“Everything alright?” he asked him.

“Sure,” Oliver replied, smiling forcedly at him.

“You got into a fight with mom, didn’t you?”

“It’s… it’s complicated.”

William rolled his eyes, probably knowing too well that often ‘complicated’ seemed to be the adult answer to everything they didn’t want to talk about.

“It’s just… It’s about Felicity,” Oliver explained after a short second. “It’s just hard that she can’t meet you.”

“Mom doesn’t want her to?”

Oliver bit his tongue, considering his answer carefully. He couldn’t poison William’s mind against Samantha. It would be the wrong thing to do. Yet he didn’t want to lie.

“I think she feels like she needs to protect you.”

“From Felicity?”

“Yeah…” Oliver said with a sigh. “Mothers feel like that sometimes. Felicity always wants to protect Emmy and Tommy from kangaroos.”

“That’s because they are scary!”

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head. “God, you would really love Felicity.”


	132. Big steps

“Ah, my favorite welcome committee,” Felicity said with a happy smile when she stepped through the door into her house, seeing Tommy sitting on the floor in his pajama and smiling at her. “Where are daddy and Emmy?”

“Hm-mee,” Tommy just replied.

He looked around like he was only now realizing that his big sister wasn’t right at his side like she usually was. He frowned, calling out for her a few times, but Emmy didn’t come running like she usually did when her baby brother called for her. Felicity was just about to say something more when she felt her phone vibrating in her purse. Quickly she pulled her phone from her purse, only glancing at the display shortly, and took the call.

“Curtis, I am already at home.”

“Yes, I know. I just had a great idea and figured I should call you immediately because it just couldn’t wait, and you know how excited I get about ideas. Anyway…”

Felicity listened to Curtis’ new idea for their joint project with Wayne Enterprise, trying her best to follow his mental leaps. Usually she was the one talking in sentence fragments, but in the last months of working more and more with Curtis Holt, she had realized that she wasn’t the only one doing so. Curtis might actually be just as good at that as she was.

Curtis was still in the middle of his explanations when Felicity turned at least part of her focus back on her son and found him standing where he had been sitting when she had looked at him the last time only a few seconds ago. His eyes were focused on Felicity determinedly. Felicity held her breath.

Tommy hadn’t taken his first steps on his own yet. If it had happened today, Oliver would have messaged her. He hadn’t, so Felicity was sure that Tommy hadn’t taken his first steps yet. He had spent a lot of time walking with his hands wrapped around the forefingers of whoever had offered to help him keep his balance. He had been hesitant about letting go of those fingers while walking, though.

“Curtis, I gotta hang up,” Felicity interrupted Curtis mid-sentence.

“What? No, no,” Curtis hurried to say. “I haven’t finished-“

Felicity didn’t listen any more. She just hung up, putting her phone away on the small table next to the door. Slowly she went down on her knees, almost afraid that if she moved too quickly, Tommy would just fall on his butt.

“Come here, buddy,” Felicity encouraged Tommy, reaching out her hands for her baby boy. “Come to mama.”

“Mama!” Tommy exclaimed, moving his arms wildly in an effort to touch her. “Mama!”

“Yes, mama’s here,” Felicity said with a nod of her head, smiling at her son. “Come here, Tommy, and you get a big hug.”

Tommy looked at her, playing with the pacifier in his mouth for a moment. His eyes stayed locked onto his mother’s face, though.

“Come here, buddy,” Felicity prompted her son again. “Come to mommy.”

And just like that Tommy started walking like he had never done anything else. He walked towards her with surprisingly stable steps, smiling around his pacifier. After five steps Tommy was right in front of his mother’s still reached-out hands. His steps began to stumble while his arms were moving out to keep his balance. Before Tommy could fall on his butt, Felicity lifted her son into her arms and held him close to her chest.

“Hi, baby!” she said, straightening back up with Tommy in her arms. “You took your first steps, and you did so well!”

She started peppering Tommy’s face with little kisses. Her son giggled in response, leaning his face against Felicity’s lips. He rested his tiny hands on Felicity’s cheeks, pulling her face back against his skin whenever it moved away.

“Hey, what’s going on here?”

Felicity looked at Oliver, who came downstairs with Emmy on his arms. She had her head snuggled to his shoulder a fist tightened in the fabric of his shirt. He absent-mindedly rubbed his hand over their daughter’s back. His eyes were focused on Felicity as he smiled at her.

“Tommy just took his first steps,” Felicity told him. “And he was amazing.”

“Congratulations, buddy,” Oliver said. “But how come you haven’t walked all day while I observed you, but once I look away and mommy’s here, you start walking, hm?”

“He’s a mama’s boy,” Felicity just replied.

When Oliver came to a stand next to his wife, he kissed Tommy’s cheek before he turned his head towards Felicity. He whispered a breathy “hi” right before he brushed his lips against hers twice, bumping his nose against hers. Felicity sighed, kissing him once more. She then kissed Emmy’s temple.

Oliver chuckled. “Emmy, now you gotta kiss Tommy, and I think everyone kissed everyone.”

Emmy made a grouching sound, moving her face against Oliver’s shoulder.

“Hey, what’s going on with you?” Felicity asked, rubbing one hand over her daughter’s back.

“I don’t like the new bed,” she said. “I want my old one back.”

Felicity sighed. She and Oliver had finally decided to buy a new bed for Emmy. She had still been sleeping in her crib and given that Emmy used to get up several times in the night, they had decided to continue like that for awhile. They had been sure that her nightly tours would only get worse with a bed that wouldn’t at least try to stop her (not that it had been able to do so). Now they had agreed that it was time for her to get a normal bed, though. Emmy just didn’t seem to like it.

“You’re a big girl now, though,” Felicity explained. “Big girls do need bigger beds.”

“I don’t want to,” she repeated.

Felicity sighed once more. When even telling her that she was a big girl wasn’t helping, the problem was serious. Because it usually helped.

“Come on, we will try to figure out what we can do to make the bed better,” Felicity suggested, heading to the stairs. “I am sure we will find a way, so you will like it.

When they had reached the head of the stairs, Tommy struggled to get out of her arms and back to the floor, so he could talk. Felicity let him down in front of her, and Tommy grabbed her fingers eagerly. He kept holding onto them while he was walking towards his own room.

“I’d say someone is tired,” Oliver said with a chuckle when Tommy let go of his mother’s fingers to hold onto the bars of the crib instead.

“Well, taking his first steps must have been exhausting,” Felicity explained, lifting Tommy into his crib.

Immediately he lay down and released a deep sigh, making Felicity smile.

“Daddy, I want to cover Tommy with a blanket,” Emmy said.

“I am sure your brother would love that,” Oliver replied, putting Emmy to the floor.

Quickly she ran to the rocking chair and grabbed the small blanket there. It had been quite warm the last nights, so Felicity had put the blanket away. Today it had been chilly, though, so maybe putting the blanket back into the crib wouldn’t be wrong.

Emmy climbed into the crib the way she had always climbed out of her own and covered Tommy with the blanket, making sure he was safely tucked into the fabric.

“Are we going to tell Tommy a bedtime story together?” Felicity asked Emmy, stepping to the crib.

“You tell Tommy and me a bedtime story, mommy,” Emmy replied.

With a quiet sigh, the toddler lay down next to her brother. She tugged at the blanket once more, pulling it a little bit tighter around her little brother. Then she leaned over and pressed a kiss to her brother’s cheek.

“See, daddy? Now everyone kissed everyone,” she stated.

Oliver stepped next to Felicity, putting an arm around her waist. “Yes, now everyone did.”

Emmy slid a little closer to her brother, putting a hand to his chest. Tommy grabbed his sister’s fingers and pulled them closer to his face. He eyed her fingers up like he had only now seen a hand for the first time.

“Are you going to sleep here?” Felicity asked.

“Can I?” Emmy asked, giving her mother her best angel’s eyes.

Felicity chuckled while Oliver was pressing a kiss to the side of her head. “Yes, of course you can. I am sure your brother likes that.”

“Thanks, mommy,” Emmy replied with a sigh.

The last syllable had just left her lips when her eyes were already closing.

“Tommy, I guess it’s only going to be us for the bedtime story tonight,” Felicity whispered to him and Tommy clapped his hands like he had understood.

“Did you have time to eat today?” Oliver asked her.

“Sure, I-“

“Lunch should be more than a sandwich in the elevator, Felicity,” Oliver told her with a playful tone of sternness.

“It wasn’t a sandwich in the elevator,” Felicity answered. She bit down on her tongue at the way Oliver looked at her. “It was a burger.”

“Not acceptable either,” Oliver told her, shaking his head with a smile. “I’ll prepare some dinner for you while you tell Tommy a bedtime story.”

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered while Oliver kissed her temple.

He tightened his arm around Felicity’s waist for a moment before he turned around and left, closing the door behind him.

“So…” Felicity asked. “What would you like for your bedtime story, Tommy?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since the next chapter will be another wish from the sex list, I picked four possible fantasies that inspire me right now. If you want to have a say in what will be next in Olicity’s sex life, you can vote here: https://twitter.com/smkkbert/status/750343498520485888
> 
> I am still taking suggestions for the wishes three to five. ;)


	133. Love to love you

“I really don’t like this at all.”

“Oliver, this was your idea,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes for like the umpteenth time.

“This wasn’t my idea.”

“Of course it was. You wrote this idea down on a white piece of paper and put it into one of the envelopes I gave to you for your birthday. You handed me the envelope and said you wanted this, so this was your idea quod erat demonstrandum.”

“It’s really turning me on when you’re speaking Latin, but I didn’t ask for this,” Oliver explained once more. “I asked for sex in the open, not for being blindfolded, driven to a secret place and then lead through the wilderness like this and- Would you stop rolling your eyes?”

Felicity stood still, quickly turning around to him. She eyed up the blindfold carefully to make sure it was still placed perfectly over his eyes. It was, so he shouldn’t be able to see her rolling her eyes. He had, though, so there had to be some way he had cheated or whatever. Felicity clenched her hand to a fist and tried to act like she would punch him. She intended to make her fist stop right in front of his face, but before she could do so, Oliver had already grabbed her wrist in the air and turned her, so her back was pressed against a tree and his chest was leaning close against hers.

Oliver ducked his head, brushing his lips against her earlobe when he whispered, “I know you in my bones, Felicity. I don’t need to see you to know what you’re doing.”

Felicity felt a comfortable shiver running down the length of her spine. She could feel Oliver’s breath ghosting over the side of her neck, making her hum contently. Oliver leaned closer, pressing his hips against hers.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“We are in the open,” he whispered. “It should be time for my wish to get fulfilled.”

He was already pressing his lips to the spot right under her ear, sucking on her soft skin. It elicited a quiet moan from Felicity and made her eyes roll back. That spot was her weakness, and Oliver knew it. It was so easy to just give in and let him take her right here and now, Felicity thought. When his hands moved down to the hem of her dress, though, she quickly pushed him back.

“Not yet.”

Oliver groaned. “Felicity!”

“Hey,” she said gently, taking his hands and squeezing reassuringly. “I know you don’t like being blindfolded, but you said you know me in your bones. And do your bones think that I would let anything happen to you?”

Being blindfolded meant losing control, and losing control was not something Oliver was good at. After years of torture and everything that had happened since, including seeing loved ones get hurt and die, she understood that and accepted that. This was just a tiny thing, though. He just needed to trust her enough to let her lead him a couple of feet further into the forest. He could do that. He trusted her enough to let her do that. She was sure of that.

“It’s not-“

“Do they?”

Oliver sighed. “No.”

“See?” she asked, straightening up on her tiptoes and pecking his lips. “It’s not that bad. You just have to trust me, and it’s only a couple of steps more. It won’t take long. I promise.”

“I think you said that the last three times already.”

She bit back the words on the tip of her tongue and instead just chuckled while she was starting to lead Oliver further down the path through the forest.

When she had read Oliver’s wish on that white card, she had honestly doubted that she could fulfill it. Sex in the open was not something they had never done before. They had actually had sex in their garden before which technically counted as the open, but the wish he had written down had explicitly excluded their garden. Felicity really wasn’t in for public sex, though. The thought of getting caught might be a turn-on for some people, but definitely not for her. She was the CEO of a really important company in this city. She couldn’t get caught having sex with her husband at a public place.

Her first idea had been a romantic midnight picnic on the rooftop of Queen Industries, but repair work there had gotten in her way. She had needed several days until she had found the perfect place to make his wish come true. And it was even more perfect than she had imagined, Felicity thought at the sight in front of her. A business partner had told her of the place. It was part of his hunting ground and allowed her to use it if she liked to. Felicity wondered if he had offered the same when he had known what she and Oliver were going to do here, but the thought was redundant. Felicity had checked the place out yesterday and had prepared everything this morning after her business partner had given her his go to use it today.

“We stopped,” Oliver stated. “Does that mean that I can take the blindfold off?”

“I will take it off,” Felicity replied.

She let go of Oliver’s hand to step behind him. Slowly she unknotted the tie that covered his eyes and let it sink. She kept her eyes on his face and watched his reaction closely as he took in the sight in front of them.

They were standing at the riverside of a small lake in the middle of the forest, and on the lake there was a sturdy raft made of wood. It looked old, probably was, but it was rugged enough to hold the bed and the lamp she had ordered to be taken here. She still blushed at the way the men she had hired for that had looked at her.

“On a scale from one to ten how perfect is this place?” she asked.

“Nine,” Oliver answered, turning around to her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

“Nine?” Felicity asked. “How can this be a nine? It should be a twelve at least!”

“It would even be a fifteen if you were naked.”

“Oh, we can arrange that pretty quickly,” Felicity replied.

Without any hesitation she slipped out of her dress, letting it pool on the ground. She let her bra and panties follow before she turned around and just ran into the water, losing her shoes on the way. She didn’t wait to check if Oliver would follow her. She knew he would even if he would first take the time to enjoy the view of her naked backside.

The water reached already up to her knees when she realized how cold it was. Screeching, she turned around on her heels and wanted to run back outside. She only managed to take two steps before Oliver’s arms wrapped around her, pulling her against him. He lifted her from the floor slightly, running until the water was deep enough for him to just let himself fall forward into it. Somehow he managed to turn them, so it was his back hitting the water first, but he kept Felicity close to him to make sure she would follow him into the cold water.

Felicity pressed herself as close to Oliver as possible, hoping his body warmth would make it easier to endure the cold water surrounding her. It wasn’t his body warmth but the feeling of his naked chest rubbing against her nipples that helped warming her, though. Felicity wrapped her arms around Oliver’s neck and her legs around his hips right before their lips met in a loving kiss as they cut the surface of the water.

When their lips parted, Felicity let her head sink to Oliver’s shoulder and closed her eyes. She pressed her lips to his pulse point, breathing in the scent of his skin.

“Want to swim for awhile?” Oliver asked, kissing Felicity’s shoulder.

“If you’re the one swimming, and I just have to hold onto you, sure,” Felicity replied, smiling against his skin.

“Wouldn’t want to overwork you after you organized this,” Oliver replied, already starting to swim. “Thank you for that.”

“It’s actually selfish, you know? I love having you all for myself every now and then. And the sex can be quite nice, too.”

“You didn’t have much of me lately,” Oliver whispered back.

Felicity didn’t miss the sad tone of his voice and pulled back enough, so she could frame his face with her gentle hands and kiss him. She knew he had gotten in a small fight with Samantha about letting William finally come and meet Felicity. It had only made him feel worse about the whole situation with them spending every other weekend apart.

“She will come around,” she whispered comfortingly. “She just needs more time.”

“I don’t want it to take more time.”

“I know,” Felicity said with a sigh and leaned down to kiss him gently, comforting him with all the love she had to offer. “Let’s not think about that for the rest of the day, okay?”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered against her lips. “Sorry.”

“There’s no need to be sorry,” Felicity replied. She tightened her one arm around his neck and stroked her other hand up and down the side of his face until Oliver leaned his head into her touch. His nose pressed against her wrist, breathing in the scent of her skin. His blue eyes stayed focused on her face. “Do you know how much I love you?”

“Half as much as I love you?” Oliver asked back, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Are we going to play the game of who loves the other more again?”

“No,” Oliver replied while his smile was turning into a smug grin, “because I already won.”

“Oh, really?” Felicity asked. “And what makes you think that?”

“I can prove it to you,” Oliver replied.

He moved them through the water towards the raft slowly. Felicity could feel his abs moving against her stomach, and she pressed herself closer to him in response. A content moan elicited from her lips when she felt his cock move against her folds for a short moment.

When they had reached the raft, Oliver ducked his head and leaned his lips against her ear.

“Felicity,” he whispered with hoarse voice, “hold onto me tight.”

“Hm… I imagined you saying this under exactly these circumstances,” Felicity replied with a giggle, doing as he had asked and holding onto him tight.

Oliver put his forearm on the raft and propped himself up, so he could use his other hand to reach somewhere behind Felicity. She could hear the rustling of a fabric before Oliver slid back deeper into the water. He sucked at the underside of her jaw, certainly leaving a hickey, before he let his hands slide from the side of her breasts down to her hips and with ease lifted Felicity to sit on the raft. The fact that she had a soft fabric beneath her butt instead of the hard wood told Felicity that Oliver had pulled the blanket from the bed and put it to the raft for her to be more comfortable.

Felicity felt her breath getting caught in her throat as Oliver’s eyes focused on her face while his hands moved from her knees up her thighs slowly. His thumbs moved to the inside of her legs, rubbing her soft skin there without getting to close to where she felt the need for him growing. He moved his hands back to her knees slowly and pushed them apart.

Never taking his eyes off her, Oliver put his flat hands to the raft next to her knees and propped himself up, so their faces were on one level. He nuzzled her nose gently and pressed a short but gentle kiss to her lips.

“Just lie back,” Oliver whispered against her lips and kissed her once more, “and enjoy.”

She released a content sigh, resting her back down until she was lying on the blanket completely. Only her legs were in the water up to her ankles. Oliver leaned down, pressing his lips to her cleavage gently before he moved them down her body over her chest and between her breasts to her stomach. He dipped his tongue into her belly button, making her giggle, before he slid back into water and put his hands to her knees once more, gently pushing them more apart.

“Oh, yes,” Felicity moaned quietly when she could feel Oliver’s stubble against the inside of her thighs, and she arched her back, opening up to him. “Please.”

“Not like that,” Oliver replied.

He put her right knee over his shoulder and did the same with her left leg. Only the tips of her toes touched the water now. Carefully pushing his hands under her butt, he pulled her closer to the edge and hence closer to his face. Pressing a kiss to the spot right over her clit, he put an arm over her hips, pressing them back down. Felicity moaned when she felt his breath ghosting over her already wet lips.

“Please,” she moaned, trying to wiggled her hips under his arm, but he was too strong, not allowing her to move even a tiny little bit.

Oliver followed her pleading gladly. He lowered his body even deeper into the water, so he could lick a long path from her opening right to her clit. Gasping for breath, Felicity moved her hands to his forearm. Her fingernails dug into the skin while her legs wrapped around his head, pulling him closer between her legs.

Oliver teased her entrance. He let the tip of his tongue enter her gently before moving out again. He did it again and again, never giving her what she really craved for. Yet it was enough to make her toes curl and heat spreading from the pit of her stomach all over her skin.

“Oliver,” Felicity moaned.

“Is it too much?”

Felicity could feel his smug grin against her entrance for a short moment before he pulled away, kissing her thigh. Felicity couldn’t help but groan. She knew how much he loved to tease her by just not giving her what she wanted most.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity pleaded.

“Maybe we should swim a little longer, you know,” Oliver suggested in a teasing tone. He pressed his lips against the inside of her knees and drew lazy patterns on the outside of her thigh with his fingertips. “It’s so warm and maybe we should-“

“Oliver!” she hissed out as her frustration increased. She propped herself up onto her elbows, looking down at where Oliver was leaning with his jaw against the inside of her leg. “Oliver, don’t even think about stopping like this! Go back and continue what you started!”

“Say please.”

Felicity pressed her lips together, taking one leg away from around his neck. She kicked him against his shoulder firmly, but it only made him chuckle. He caught her foot in the air and pulled it to his lips, so he could kiss her sole.

“Now hurry up and get back to your job down there!”

“Since you asked so nicely,” Oliver said with a chuckle.

And without any further delay he leaned forward and licked a long path from her entrance to her clit. He wrapped his lips around the little bundle of nerves and started sucking. Felicity’s hips bucked since she was again trying to move against his mouth, but Oliver’s arm kept her down firmly. A deep moan fell from her lips. Her right hand clawed deeper into his forearm, while her left hand buried in his hair to pull him closer between her legs.

“Oh my god!” Felicity choked out.

When she felt Oliver’s front teeth gently biting down on her clit, she gasped for breath and tightened her hands on his hair and his forearm. She arched her back, angling her clit to his lips and tongue while Oliver war starting to suck at her clip and flick his tongue over it again and again.

The heat in the pit of her stomach increased. She felt like her skin was on fire. It hurt, but it hurt in a good way. It hurt in the kind of way that was so enjoyable that you never wanted the pain to stop. Felicity didn’t want it to stop. She squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her lips together to muffle the sounds that threatened to fall from her lips with increasing pleasure.

“Oliver,” she moaned when the familiar tingle in the tip of her toes started. “Don’t stop! Don’t stop! Don’t stop!”

And Oliver didn’t stop. Instead he sucked particularly firmly on her clit. All it took was one more flick of his tongue, and Felicity came with a long moan. Her body felt as light as she thought it had never done before, almost like it was floating. Her mind was empty, unable to form even a single thought.

Oliver worked her through her orgasm with his tongue. While the last waves of pleasure were running through her, he took his arm from her hips and let her move the way she wanted. Felicity rode out the last aftershocks of her pleasure before her body melted against the wood of the raft without any tension left in her body.

“Thank you so much,” she said with a sigh, trying to catch her breath. “That was amazing.”

He took Felicity’s legs from his shoulders and put them back into the water. Felicity could hear the bicker of water before Oliver’s wet body appeared above her. Smiling at her, he lowered himself onto her, pressing his naked body to hers. His lips met hers in a long kiss that knew no hurry. Felicity could taste herself on his lips and tongue, and she could feel him rock-hard between her legs where she was still so sensitive.

Felicity stroked her fingertips up and down Oliver’s back while he was kissing her neck. He worshipped her pulse point, sucking and biting gently. Felicity knew he was leaving marks that she would have to cover at work. She didn’t care, though.

When Oliver’s hips started to move against hers, seeking some friction, Felicity moaned. She wrapped her legs around his hips, moving in synch to his thrusts. He didn’t enter her, just sliding back and forth between her folds perfectly. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, moaning in pleasure. When his thick head bumped against her clit, her eyes rolled into the back of her head.

“Turn around,” she ordered.

Oliver hummed against the side of her neck, and for the split of a second she thought he might deny her the wish because she knew how much he loved to be on top. He put his hands on Felicity’s butt to keep her in place as he turned around, making her sit in his lap.

While their lips were meeting in another kiss, a harsher one this time, Felicity reached behind her and positioned the head of Oliver’s cock at her entrance. Breaking the kiss and locking eyes with him, she sank down on him torturously slowly. When he was seated deep inside of her, they kept looking at each other without saying anything and without moving for a long time, just enjoying the moment of intimacy.

Felicity stroked her hands over Oliver’s face, looking at him like she hadn’t seen him in ages. His piercing blue eyes were focused on her face, taking her in just as intensely. His gaze lingered at her lips for awhile, the desire to kiss her visible in his eyes. Only when due to a movement of the water the raft moved and made Oliver move in side of Felicity, hitting a particularly sensitive spot, they leaned forward and kissed.

Oliver’s lips brushed against Felicity’s twice before they opened up to each other. Their tongues met in a familiar dance. Sighing into the kiss contently, Felicity put her arms around Oliver’s neck and pressed her chest closer to him. Slowly their hips started to move, Oliver’s meeting Felicity’s down-thrust with an up-thrust. They settled a slow, gentle rhythm, both of them knowing that they had all the time in the world.

Felicity knew that this was Oliver’s favorite position. He loved holding her so close against him that he could feel her heartbeat against his chest, and he loved sucking at her pulse point and listening to all the little sounds it elicited from her. Felicity tightened her arms around his neck, clawing a hand in his hair and keeping his head in place.

“This feels good,” Felicity whispered when she felt her pleasure increasing.

The position made Oliver slide deep inside of her, hitting just the right spots, and with the movements of the raft every thrust felt different than the one before. The more they moved, the more the raft moved. Her clit was rubbing against his skin, increasing her pleasure even more.

Oliver’s answer was a hum against her skin. His hands took a path down from her neck over her back to her butt. He grabbed her flesh firmly, supporting her movements with ease. She knew it was his wordless way of telling her to continue, so she did.

“I’m close,” Felicity whispered, resting her cheek against the top of Oliver’s head and biting down on her bottom lip. “So close.”

“Me too,” Oliver replied.

He let go of her neck to lean his head back and lock eyes with Felicity. His pupils were blown wide with lust, the color of his iris slightly darkened. His lips were opened, heavy breaths escaping them. Oliver thrust up into her harder, making Felicity moan in response. His movements quickened as he was growing closer to his orgasm.

She tried to hold on just a little longer to have this last just a little bit more. Felicity’s fingernails clawed into his skin, silently telling him that she wanted them to come together. Oliver gave her a barely visible nod before he tightened his arms around her body to pull her as close as possible, never breaking eye contact.

All it took was three more thrusts before the pleasure reached its high for both of them. Felicity released a deep moan, biting down on her bottom lip, while Oliver groaned out her name. His movements stuttered when he released his seed inside of her.

Slowly they both rode out their orgasms while their lips were meeting in a loving kiss. The last aftershocks were still running through them, making their bodies spasm involuntarily against each other’s, when Oliver lay down. He took Felicity with him, so she was sprawled out across his chest with her ear resting on his heart and listening to his heartbeat. His hands stroked up and down her neck lazy, eliciting goose bumps along her spine.

Felicity tried to catch her breath, pressing kisses to Oliver’s chest every now and then. Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath, held it in her lungs for a moment and then breathed out slowly. She could hear Oliver’s heart skipping the one or other beat until it was beating in perfect unison with hers.

“I love this,” Oliver whispered after awhile. “I could lie here like this forever.”

“We should definitely stay here awhile longer because I am not sure that my legs would be able to walk already,” Felicity replied with a yawn. “Besides, there is no hurry. The kids are with Thea, and my business partner promised nobody will come here today or tomorrow or even the day after that.”

“Good.”

“We could even stay until it will be dark. I am smart; I brought a lamp.”

“Very smart,” Oliver confirmed and pressed his lips to the top of her head. “One question, though.”

“Shoot.”

“What did you think we needed a bed for?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ll be on vacation for a week (July 17th to July 24th), so there won’t be any updates in the next two weeks, I guess. When I come back, we’ll start right away with the angst I promised. ;)


	134. A hurtful reproach

Felicity looked down at the gossip rag with a sigh, skimming the headline of the front page for the umpteenth time.

_OLLIE QUEEN BETRAYED! – A heartbreaking discovery for Ollie as wife Felicity’s romantic affair with ex Ray Palmer is caught on camera_

Shaking her head and sighing once more, Felicity took the gossip rag and trashed it. She didn’t even know why she had bought it in the first place. It wasn’t like it was the first time that a stupid paparazzo wrote such bullshit about her. When she had been on a tech fair with Ray while being pregnant with Tommy, there had been gossips about Ray being the father all over the gossip news. And those gossips had persisted stubbornly even after Tommy had been born.

She hated reading those lies about herself, but marrying into a rich family or more importantly someone like Oliver Queen and becoming CEO of a quite successful company had its prize.

Felicity could just hope that Oliver saw it the same way. She knew that he didn’t react well to those gossips. He hated it even more than she did. Sucking in a deep breath, Felicity glanced out of the window. She didn’t know why this headline made her so much more nervous than the last ones had. She and Oliver were happy, so there was no reason he should believe these gossips now when he hadn’t believed them ever before. He hadn’t liked them, but he had never doubted that there wasn’t any truth in them. There had been too much crap written about him and his family already for him to believe even a word of those gossips.

Yet, here Felicity was, standing at the window and waiting nervously for Oliver and the kids to come back from their weekend trip to Central City, so she could find out his reaction. How high were the chances that Oliver hadn’t seen the headlines at the airport and she could tell him about it without any ruffle or excitement? Probably slim because if he hadn’t seen any of the magazine covers, Emmy or Tommy probably had. And Oliver had had all the way here to think about it. That could be either good or bad.

Ray was still a sensitive spot for Oliver. It was ridiculous given the circumstances that had led her to start anything with him in the first place, but that was how it was. Felicity knew that and was considerate of that, at least within bounds. She didn’t want to upset Oliver on purpose, but Ray was a friend and sometimes Oliver’s unnecessary jealousy of him was just annoying.

Felicity sighed, propping her head up on her hand and looking out of the window. Her gaze was focused on the driveway while she was thinking about what had happened yesterday and if there was anything that could possibly be held against her.

 

 

_“Okay, turn around and let me see you in your full glory.”_

_Felicity laughed. “The way you say it makes it sound like I am naked.”_

_“Given the neckline on the front and the back of the dress, it almost is as if you’re naked, right?”_

_“You’re exaggerating,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes._

_Oliver lifted his forefinger and moved it, indicating that she should turn around, so he could take in the dress completely. So Felicity held her phone away and turned around, smiling at Oliver’s picture on the display with enjoyment. Seeing his reaction made her smile, even if it was only on the display, because his admiring gaze was the same._

_“You know what’s wrong about the dress?”_

_“That you can’t take it off?”_

_“It’s like you’re reading my mind, babe.”_

_Felicity chuckled. “Maybe if you’re really nice, I might put it on again tomorrow, so you can take it off then.”_

_“I would like that.”_

_Sighing, Felicity sat down on the couch, holding the phone in front of her face and looking at Oliver’s tired face. His hair was tousled, and there were dark rings under his slightly unfocused eyes._

_“Everything alright?”_

_“Yes,” he said with a yawn. “Just tired. I’ve had nightmares for years. Yesterday I think Tommy has turned into my personal nightmare, though. He cried for three hours straight, slept for half an hour and cried until seven when Emmy woke up.”_

_Again Felicity chuckled. “And we always thought Emmy was bad with her unusual sleeping habits.”_

_“Yeah,” Oliver said, yawning once more._

_“Go to bed, hon,” Felicity suggested. “You’re falling asleep, sitting here and talking to me.”_

_“I could never fall asleep while talking to you.”_

_“I remember ten situations when you did without putting any effort into thinking about it,” Felicity replied. “I am sure there were more.”_

_“You’re mean.”_

_“You’re getting old.”_

_“And you’re getting meaner.”_

_“You’re getting grumpy when you’re tired,” Felicity said with a smile. “Our kids definitely got that from you.”_

_“You’re still mean, but probably right,” Oliver stated, yawning once more. “At least about going to bed. I love you. I miss you. And I can’t wait to be home again.”_

_Felicity smiled, air-kissing his picture on the display of her phone. “Same here. Night, hon.”_

_“Night, babe. And have fun!”_

_Felicity ended the video call and glanced at her watch. Thea and Laurel should be here any minute. There was a new club opening today, and the three of them had decided to go there and enjoy a girls’ night. Since Oliver and the kids weren’t there, and Roy was on duty in the Arrow cave, it had seemed the perfect night to spend with each other. They had invited Lyla, but she was on a mission for A.R.G.U.S._

_Fifteen minutes later Felicity was proved wrong of this night being the perfect one to spend with her friends. First Thea texted her that she had apparently had a food poisoning from the sushi she had had this afternoon, and three minutes later Laurel excused herself because of a job getting in the way. So there Felicity was, sitting on her couch in an empty house and wearing a dress she had bought for this girls’ night._

_“Perfect!” she mumbled to herself._

_She walked into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of the alcohol-free champagne. If there was no party to go to, she could at least have this little nightcap before going to bed._

_Felicity had just sat down at the kitchen island when there was a quiet knock at the door. She considered ignoring it, but instead took another sip of her glass and strolled to the door. It wasn’t like she had anything to do tonight anyway!_

_“Ray!” she said when she opened the door, smiling at her friend in surprise. “I had no idea you were in Starling.”_

_She stepped forward, wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. It had been awhile since she had last seen Ray. Since he had moved away, there hadn’t been many occasions they had had to meet. Ray came here during the holidays or when there was a birthday, but he didn’t always get around doing so._

_“Well, it was supposed to be a short visit in which case I probably wouldn’t have come here, but the meeting took longer than I thought. It will have to be continued tomorrow, so I thought I’d spend the evening to come here and visit my favorite family in Starling City,” Ray explained with a chuckle. “You know, I just can’t live without Oliver’s death glare for too long.”_

_“Yeah, you know him,” Felicity said, pulling at Ray’s hand to make him come in. “He turns into a caveman when he’s jealous.”_

_“Emmy’s version of that death glare is quite sweet, though.”_

_Felicity chuckled. “She tries to do everything the way her daddy does it. If you came here to meet them, you’ve come at a bad timing, though. Oliver and the kids are in Central City, visiting William.”_

_“Oh. Good for them, I guess, but why aren’t you there?”_

_“That’s a long story. The short version would be that Samantha’s just not ready to let me meet William yet,” Felicity explained with a quiet sigh, leading her friend into the kitchen. “Do you want a glass of champagne?”_

_“Fancy dress, champagne… Are you celebrating a one-lady-party?”_

_“It was supposed to be a three-ladies-party, but unfortunately one lady got sick and the other had to work.”_

_“You should have said that immediately,” Ray replied with a wide smile. “Come on, I’ll take you out to dinner.”_

_“You don’t have to-”_

_“And by ‘I’ll take you out to dinner’,” Ray interrupted her quickly, “I actually mean ‘I’ll take your dress out to dinner’ because that is a nice dress and it deserves to be taken out. It’s not a dress to sit in the dark of your kitchen and drink a glass of champagne alone. And I am sure your husband won’t punch me when I am taking the dress out to dinner. He might punch me when I am taking his wife out to dinner, though.”_

_“He won’t punch you,” Felicity told him, rolling her eyes slightly, before she muttered, “since he isn’t here.”_

_Ray chuckled. He hadn’t missed the last part it seemed. “Come on, I know the perfect place. It’s a little steakhouse, very great food.”_

_Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, hesitating to answer. Going to dinner with her ex was a little weird, but then again Ray wasn’t only an ex. He was a good friend. They had a lot in common. And what spoke against going out to dinner with a friend when she didn’t have anything else to do anyway?_

_“Okay, let’s go,” Felicity said with a smile, nodding towards the door._

_Ray was right. The dress was too nice to not be taken out, and it was just dinner, so what should be wrong about that?_

 

Felicity frowned. Had it been wrong to agree to Ray’s suggestion? But why should it have been wrong? He was a friend, and Felicity had had nothing to do. No, Felicity didn’t feel guilty about going out to dinner with her friend Ray. There was nothing wrong with that.

The problem was that a few paparazzi had seen them and taken photos at the worst moment of time. Ray had just talked to her about Anna, and Felicity had reached out her hand to squeeze his fingers in silent comfort. And of course that had been when the paparazzi had started taking photos. The gossip magazines were full of the pictures and the story they had made up with them.

She didn’t feel guilty, but she knew that it looked bad. The way she and Ray were looking at each other in those pictures…

Felicity shook her head. She was probably worrying about nothing. Oliver was a jealous guy, but most of the time it was more about teasing and having especially hot sex after a made-up fight than anything else. And Oliver had never believed any of those lies the press had told. He had even gone all Arrow on a reporter who had claimed Tommy would indeed be Ray’s child instead of his.

There really was no reason for Oliver to believe those stupid lies the reporters had made up now, Felicity decided. She took in a deep breath and breathed out with a sigh. That was what boredom did to her – she was thinking about problems that weren’t there.

When Oliver’s car appeared at the end of the driveway, even the last bit of tension fell off from Felicity’s shoulders. Knowing Oliver and the kids were back home again just relaxed her more than she had thought was necessary. She quickly walked outside, opening the door just in time to see the car rolling into the garage.

She had made it half-way to the garage when Emmy came running out. With her arms spread out and her pink giraffe in her right hand, she ran towards Felicity.

“Mommy!” she shouted happily and jumped right up at her mother to wrap her arms around her neck tightly and snuggle her little body up to her mother’s chest.

“Hi, sweetie,” Felicity replied. She turned her head and kissed her daughter’s temple and cheek. “How was your weekend with William?”

“Great!” Emmy replied, leaning back in her mother’s arms to look at her. “We built a fort in his room and it was sooo big.”

Emmy spread her short arms, trying to show her mother that it had been a giant fort. Felicity chuckled because if the fort had been as big as Emmy’s arms were able to show, it hadn’t been really much.

“That sounds cool,” Felicity replied yet, glancing towards the garage where Oliver was trying to get the suitcase out of the trunk while keeping Tommy safe on his arm. “Did you have dinner already?”

“Yes, we were at McDonalds.”

“What?” Felicity asked Oliver with faked outrage, winking at Emmy at the same time. Usually Oliver was the one to say that they shouldn’t eat at McDonalds. “Daddy allowed you to eat food like that?”

“It seemed to be the easiest solution,” Oliver replied, not looking at her. He sounded off. “Emmy, it’s late. And you promised me you’d go right to bed.”

“Okay,” Emmy said with a sigh. “Night, mommy.”

“Night, hon,” Felicity replied, stroking her hand over her daughter’s hair as she walked past her into the house.

When Oliver was next to her, Tommy reached out his arms for her, and Oliver handed Tommy over to her without saying a word. He just took the suitcase and carried it into the house. Felicity looked after him, biting her tongue.

“Mama,” Tommy said, nuzzling her cheek.

“Hi, buddy. Did you have a good time with daddy?”

“Dada.”

“Yes, with daddy.”

Oliver was standing at the foot of the stairs, busying himself with his hands.

“Are you taking Tommy to bed? I’ll help Emmy.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “If you’re tired, I could also-“

“I’m fine,” Oliver answered brusquely, going up the stairs.

Felicity frowned, looking after him.

So she guessed that he had seen the magazine headlines. Unlike she had anticipated, she didn’t understand his closed off reaction, though. Yes, she had kind of feared that something like this would happen, but now that it did, Felicity didn’t understand. She had never done anything to deserve this mistrust or his rejecting behavior right now. She had never cheated on him before, so there was no reason for him to think she was now.

“Mama,” Tommy said again, snuggling his cheek to her shoulder with a tired sigh.

“I’ll take you to bed, buddy,” Felicity stated, pressing her lips to her son’s temple. “And then I will have a probably not so nice talk to your daddy.”

 

 

When Felicity came back downstairs with the baby monitor in her hand half an hour later, Oliver was sitting on the couch. He had his elbows propped onto his knees. His head was hanging down as he was looking at the floor. She could see that his muscles were tense.

Even when she stepped into the living room, he didn’t move. Felicity knew that he had heard her, though. So he didn’t seem to have calmed down and was still punishing her with rejection for something she hadn’t done.

“Do you want to tell me something, Oliver?” Felicity asked with tense voice.

She put the monitor to the small commode next to the door and leaned back against the edge of it. Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she looked at Oliver and waited for any kind of reaction. She got one when Oliver released a dry chuckle.

“I was going to ask you the same.”

Felicity bit her tongue. Yes, Oliver was definitely pissed. He just had no reason and no right to be so. She hadn’t done anything wrong.

“What were you going to ask me?”

“If you wanted to tell me something,” Oliver replied, now lifting his head to look at her. “About your romantic candlelight dinner with Palmer maybe? Because the last time I checked you were going to have dinner with Laurel and Thea.”

“Oh, you checked that?” Felicity asked, clenching her jaws.

“You know what I mean,” Oliver just replied.

Oh, yes. She did know how he meant that, but given his closed off and pissed reaction, Felicity felt like she had the right to do the same.

“Laurel had to work and Thea called in sick,” she answered nonetheless.

“And luckily Palmer came over and saved the evening by taking you out to dinner.”

“If you want to phrase it that way, yes.”

“Yes?” Oliver asked with a hiss.

Felicity bit her tongue. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She would have told Oliver, but she had forgotten to take her phone to dinner, had fallen right into bed when she had been home, and she hadn’t been able to reach him today. That wasn’t the point, though. It shouldn’t matter how he had found out about her dinner with Ray. He would have to know either way that it had been a platonic evening with a friend she cared about.

“Well, since Thea and Laurel stood me up and you and the kids were in Central City, I had nothing-“

“Oh, so that is what this is about? Because I decided to go to visit my son in Central City as you told me was alright with you, you are paying me back for that by going out with Palmer behind my back?”

“It was not behind your back,” Felicity replied angrily, “and this has nothing to do with paying you back for anything. You are twisting my words. All I meant to say was that you weren’t here, and-“

“-and Ray was,” Oliver interrupted her, shaking his head with another dry chuckle. “That’s great, Felicity!”

Felicity tried to say something more, but actually she believed that it just made no sense to talk to Oliver as long as he was like that. He would twist her words no matter what she would say, and she was in the mood for a fight like that. She didn’t even want to fight because clearly they were both angry now and the fight would only explode. It would be much easier to talk this out tomorrow.

“How about we just go to bed and talk tomorrow when things have calmed down and-“

“Calmed down?” Oliver asked.

He got up from the couch and approached her with his angry eyes focused on her. Felicity knew the expression in his eyes. It was the one that was saved for when he confronted a criminal. It was the Arrow’s eyes that were looking at her right now. When she didn’t flinch away, though, not scared he would hurt her or anything, Oliver’s gaze softened slightly as if he was only realizing now that he wasn’t confronting a villain but talking to her. The anger still stayed in his eyes, though.

“How can this calm down?” he continued after a short pause, “You went out with Ray, holding hands with him and doing God knows what else while I have been in Central City, taking care of our children. That explains why you’ve been so calm about me leaving every other weekend, though. It was the perfect opportunity to meet him, wasn’t it?”

“You can’t be serious about this,” Felicity whispered.

She felt her anger being joined by disappointment and hurt the longer they talked. She hadn’t really thought that Oliver would think something like that of her. He had no reason to.

“I am just going to ask this once,” Oliver asked tensely. “Is there anything going on between you and Palmer?”

“You don’t seriously think that, don’t you?”

“How can I not think that, Felicity? You have seen the covers and the headlines! Those photos are kind of convincing and-“

“This whole talk is ridiculous!”

“That is not an answer!”

“You know what? If you really need an answer to that question we might have to reconsider where we are in our marriage.”

“Yes, maybe we should.”

Felicity felt like Oliver’s words had punched her right in the face. She had thought her words would be enough for Oliver to realize that this whole fight was only stupid and a result of something she didn’t really understand herself yet, but obviously he was too caught in his delusions.

“I cannot talk to you right now,” Felicity replied in a whisper. Her voice was barely louder than a breath. She moved her fingers through her hair, shaking her head. “I… I will… I need some air.”

She didn’t dare to look at Oliver again. She didn’t want to see the angry expression in his eyes, telling her that he felt betrayed when it was her who was accused of cheating on him. It made her stomach twist and turn because there had never been such mistrust between them. Oliver would have never thought something like that, and the fact that he did now despite everything they had been through hurt her deep in her soul.

So without saying another word or turning back to look at him, Felicity grabbed her keys from the small table next to the door and slammed the door shut behind her. Her hands were shaking when she pulled her phone out of the back pocket of her jeans. She dialed the first number that came to her mind.

“Yeah?”

“Hi. I know it’s late,” she said, trying to suppress a sob, but it escaped her lips nonetheless.

“Felicity, what’s going on?”

“I… I had a fight with Oliver. Can I… come over to talk?”

“Sure, anytime. Shall I pick you up?”

“No, I’m… I’ll get into my car and get to you. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Okay, see you then. Oh, and Felicity?”

“Yes?”

“I am sure that everything will be alright.”

“I hope so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that some of you will come and yell at me what I am doing because you think that this will make no sense, but we will dig a little deeper into why this is happening in the next chapters.


	135. Say something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !WARNING! (with major spoiler): This chapters includes scare and mention of miscarriage.

“I just don’t get where this mistrust is coming from,” Felicity whispered and sighed.

For the last half an hour she had told Lyla everything that had happened tonight. Sitting on Lyla’s half of the bed in the dark of the bedroom and telling her friend everything that had bothered her tonight was helping. Lyla was holding her hands, squeezing her fingers comfortingly from time to time. She hadn’t said anything yet, though, giving Felicity the time she needed to get everything off her chest. Felicity appreciated it.

“I just really don’t get it,” Felicity repeated with another sigh. “He has never mistrusted me like that. Never.”

Felicity could see her friend nodding slowly before she said, “It’s unusual for Oliver to act like that.”

“Absolutely,” Felicity agreed. “We are teasing each other with being jealous, but it’s never really serious. It hasn’t been in years.”

Felicity remembered very well when it hasn’t been about teasing the last time. Emmy hadn’t been three months old. She and Emmy had surprised Oliver with a visit in his office during his lunch break. They had decided to make a short trip to a café together and had run into Ray on their way there. They had only chatted for a short time, but Oliver had been jealous nonetheless. It hadn’t last long, though, and it hadn’t been bad or at last not this bad.

They were just so far over the point of being jealous of anyone else. They loved each other, and they had built their own family. There was nobody else for either of them. Felicity knew that Oliver had a history of cheating, and yet she knew that he would never cheat on her. Why couldn’t he show her the same trust? Especially since she had never cheated.

“Are you sure there is nothing else bothering him?” Lyla asked.

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders. “Given that he has been in Central City, maybe something happened there, but… I don’t know.”

Felicity knew that he had gotten into a little fight with Samantha not so long ago. He had talked to her about finally letting Felicity meet him, but Samantha hadn’t been ready. Oliver was still angry at her because of that. It was just no reason to accuse Felicity of cheating. She wasn’t the one standing in the way of her meeting William.

“I know this whole situation is exhausting for him, and he hates that I still didn’t get to meet William. I even understand why it upsets him so much, but that is no reason to attack me like he did tonight,” Felicity explained loudly. “I don’t particularly like this situation either, but I am doing my best to be an adult and make the best of the situation. He wants to see his son and I accept that and support that. Samantha won’t let me see him, so I am not urging Oliver to convince her otherwise, so I don’t drive a wedge between them that could make things more complicated. Instead I have been patient and supportive of him, and still I am met with something like this?”

She really had done the best she could. She had always encouraged Oliver to build a relationship with his son because as a woman who had grown up without her dad, she knew how much it sucked for a child to not get to know one parent. She had always reassured him when he had had doubts about the situation, and she had never lost one bad word about the whole thing.

Felicity had been supportive about all of this because she knew how much it meant to Oliver and that getting to know his son was important for him. She hadn’t liked the situation, but she had tried to make the best of it. It wouldn’t have been fair to either William or Oliver to keep them from building a father-son-relationship between them because William’s mother was insecure about the situation.

“You know, I could complain about him meeting his one-night-stand-turning-mother-of-his-first-child every other weekend, too. I don’t do that, though, because I trust him and I know that he only loves me and… I am like the perfectly supportive wife, and he is… What the hell is he thinking?”

“Oh my god!” John said with a deep groan, sitting up on his side of the bed and looking at the two women in the dark.

“Baby, can’t you sleep?” Lyla asked amusedly, patting her husband’s thigh over the blanket.

Felicity suppressed a chuckle. When she had arrived at here, Lyla had opened up in a dressing gown, looking tired. Felicity had immediately offered to leave, but Lyla had just taken her hand and pulled her into the apartment. John had just rolled onto his side when they had come into the bedroom, trying to fall back to sleep. Felicity wasn’t surprised that with her and Lyla’s heart-to-heart he hadn’t been able to do so, though.

“Felicity, what has kept Oliver from being with you for months and made him insecure again and again?” John asked, reaching out his hand and switching on the light on the nightstand. He groaned slightly at the bright light and muttered a few words that sounded suspiciously like “I need to get new friends”, but he turned back around to Felicity and gave her a look that told her that he still wanted an answer.

“The fact that he is the Arrow which puts out lives in danger from time to time?” Felicity asked. When John cocked his head, wordlessly asking if that was a question, Felicity cleared her throat. “The fact that he is the Arrow which puts our lives in danger from time to time.”

“And why was he able to get over that?”

“Because he is the world’s best husband and father,” Felicity said, doing her best to not make it sound like a question again.

“Do you think he feels like the world’s best husband and father right now?”

Felicity took in a deep breath. She knew that being an amazing husband and father had always been Oliver’s way of compensating the downsides of his vigilante life. He knew that he was a good husband and a great father and that was why he allowed himself to stay with Felicity and the kids even if some crisis in his dangerous nightlife occurred.

“The fact that he is traveling off every other weekend does not make him an any less great husband or father,” Felicity replied. “He is great with the kids, and he is amazing to me when is not accusing me of cheating.”

“But do you think Oliver feels like he is a good husband and father with the whole situation in Central City?” John asked again.

“Probably not,” Felicity replied, knowing that Oliver always put high requirements on himself. “That’s no excuse to let out his frustration on me, though.”

She understood that he didn’t like this, but in that case he should have talked to her and let her reassure him instead of accusing her of such thing like cheating.

“I don’t think it’s frustration that drove him to say something like that,” John said with a sigh. “It was probably a part of it, but I actually think your husband is scared shitless.”

Felicity frowned. She had a suspicion what he meant, but she wasn’t sure, so she asked, “What do you mean?”

“Oliver always felt safe in your marriage because he knows that he is a great husband and father which means that you wouldn’t leave when there are any problems. Why would you leave when you knew that he is actually amazing with your family life? But now… Now he has another child in Central City, a child you are not allowed to meet. He is taking your kids every other weekend to travel with them to Central City where said son and his mother live. Doesn’t sound like the perfect husband and father he is always trying to be,” Diggle explained, looking at Felicity for a long moment. “He feels like he is not able to be the man he wants to be and he thinks you deserve when it comes to his family and that frustrated him and it scares the shit out of him.”

“He should still know that I wouldn’t leave him,” Felicity replied stubbornly, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “And he should talk to me instead of attacking me.”

“Yeah, because we both know Oliver is great at talking about his emotions.”

“He has become better.”

John sighed, nodding his head. “Yes, he did. But I don’t think he is that evolved that he can speak about his fear of losing you to some other guy because he isn’t capable of giving him what he thinks you deserve. Not with these circumstances.”

Felicity bit her tongue, taking in a deep breath. She knew Oliver had insecurities. It had always been like that. He had always been scared that he wouldn’t be enough for her because of the Arrow identity, but they had moved past that probably because of the way their family worked as John had pointed out.

“It’s still no excuse.”

“No, it’s not,” John agreed. “I just think that it is an explanation.”

Felicity sighed. “So what do I do now? Go home and tell him that I understand why he said what he said?”

“No,” John replied with a slight chuckle. “You go home and drag his ass like you always do when he feels insecure for no reason.”

“Maybe not be too hard to him,” Lyla added. “I am sure he is already beating himself up for what he said.”

Felicity nodded slowly, taking one hand of Lyla and Diggle and squeezing them. “Thank you two so much.”

“Always, Felicity,” Lyla replied. She pulled Felicity into her arms and hugging her. “You’re always welcome here.”

“More during the daily hours than the nightly, but always,” John added.

“Ignore him,” Lyla said with a chuckle. “He’s getting old and needs his sleep.”

“Hey!” John said pouting. “I am not getting old.”

Felicity chuckled. Talking to John and Lyla was always helping her. She didn’t even know what she’d do without them. They were the only ones she could really talk to given that Thea was Oliver’s sister and Laurel his ex-girlfriend. It could be quite awkward to talk to one of them though she felt more like that than her friends did.

“I’ll walk you to the door,” Lyla suggested.

“Oh, that’s not necessary,” Felicity replied. “You’ve already done enough. Better get back to sleep.”

“Okay,” Lyla said with a smile. “Call me if you need anything.”

“I will,” Felicity promised. She crawled over John, kissing his cheek. “Night, John.”

“Night, Felicity.”

Felicity closed the door behind her, tiptoeing downstairs to not wake Sara.

She would go home and confront Oliver about his insecurities and about his reproach. They would have to have a serious talk about this.

Felicity shook her head with a quiet sigh when she closed the door behind her and locked it with the emergency key she had. This was not how she had imagined the evening would go when she had talked to Oliver on the phone yesterday. She had thought they would have a great evening that they would maybe even remember forever given the news she had wanted to share with him.

If they remembered this evening forever now, it wouldn’t be a in a good way.

 

 

Felicity took a deep breath, gathering herself, before she opened the front door and stepped into the dark house. She closed the door quietly, not wanting to wake the kids. She dropped her keys in the little bowl on the table next to her and listened into the house with her eyes focused on the small crack of the door to the kitchen where the light was switched on.

“…think she just came home,” she heard Oliver state calmly. “Yes, I will… Yes… Sorry for waking you… Yes, I will- … Yes. Sorry again… Night, John.”

A small smile formed on her lips. Poor John! As quickly as her smile had formed as quickly it fell apart again, though. She would have to confront Oliver now, and she really wasn’t feeling like fighting with him. She just had to or it would forever be between them.

Felicity straightened her shoulders and walked to the kitchen. She found Oliver at the kitchen bar with his phone in his hands. The baby monitor was positioned right in front of him with the display showing a soundly asleep Tommy. Oliver looked at her with his lips pressing to each other’s and a guilty expression in his blue eyes.

“Hey,” he whispered.

“Hi,” Felicity replied, staying at the door, unsure where else to go.

“I… uhm… wasn’t spying after you,” Oliver explained quietly, waving with the phone in his hand. “I was just… worried. This city isn’t exactly safe and I lost so many people here already and I just… worried.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “I know.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, checking if she really meant it. Only when he was sure of that he lowered his gaze back to his hands with a wordless nod. For a long moment neither of them said a word. The silence was uncomfortable and almost deafening.

“I’m sorry for what I said to you,” he whispered after a long moment, looking back at her. “I didn’t mean to attack you like I did.”

Felicity crossed her arms in front of her chest, cocking her head and looking at him closely. She thought about his words carefully before she replied, “You didn’t want to attack me like you did?”

“It just… I obsessed over those photos on my way back home here and… and it all came out a lot angrier and reproachful than it was meant,” Oliver explained. “I didn’t mean to attack you like that, and I am truly sorry that I did.”

“So you are sorry that it ended up being so angry and attacking, but you are not generally apologizing for suspecting me of cheating?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow.

Oliver’s eyes stayed locked on hers for a long moment before he lowered his gaze, whispering, “Those photos exist, Felicity.”

“You can’t be serious,” Felicity replied with a groan.

She rubbed her fingers over her forehead as she felt a dull headache forming behind it. She turned around and put her hands to the edge of the kitchen counter, taking in a deep breath. Oliver just couldn’t be serious about this. He couldn’t apologize for the way he had accused to her but defend what he had accused her of.

“Felicity, what am I supposed to think?” he asked her, his voice not failing to sound helpless. “I am in Central City, and you tell me that will meet with Laurel and Thea. Then the next morning I stumble over those magazine covers, showing photos of Palmer and you, sitting in a nice restaurant with candlelight and holding hands and gazing into each other’s eyes. What am I supposed to take from that?”

“What you are supposed to take from that,” Felicity replied angrily, quickly spinning around towards him, “is that my plans changed. I was stood up and since I saw no reason to stay the night home alone, I decided to have a platonic dinner with a friend I don’t get to see very often.”

“Those photos did not look platonic at all to me,” Oliver replied through gritted teeth, his hands forming to fists on the top of the kitchen counter. “You were holding hands.”

“Yes!” Felicity yelled, “Because he was telling me how much he missed Anna, and I could understand his pain because there were so many times that I thought I had lost you forever, too, and I remember how much that hurt! So I took his hand and comforted him because that is what friends do.”

“Oh, and the reporters came right that second?”

“Yes!”

Oliver shook his head. “You have to admit that it sounds pretty unbelieving.”

“It wouldn’t if you trusted me.”

Felicity watched him biting his tongue. She took in a deep breath, trying to pull herself together. She hadn’t wanted to yell at him, rather because of their sleeping children than because of him, but the reason didn’t matter. She needed to calm down a little or at least to lower her voice again.

“You know, it’s not my fault that our situation is so messy with what’s going on in Central City. I understand that it burdens you, but that is no reason to-“

“It isn’t a reason for you to go out with your ex-boyfriend, either.”

“Oh my god,” Felicity said with a groan, shaking her head and lowering her face into her hands with a frustrated chuckle.

This conversation wasn’t leading them anywhere. She already knew that this evening wouldn’t end with them making up like they usually did after a fight. Oliver was too obsessed over those photos, making up problems that weren’t real because he felt insecure about their situation. He wouldn’t let her convince him of how wrong he was about those photos. At least for now he was too caught up in his delusions.

“I just don’t understand why you just didn’t call or text me or anything, so I wouldn’t get the feeling that you are seeing him behind my back.”

“There were times that you just knew that I wasn’t doing anything behind your back and knew maybe just didn’t get around to tell you before you found out. It’s just a… a sad… sad and dis-… disappointing…”

Felicity put her hand in front of her eyes and propped up her elbow on the kitchen counter when dark spots were blocking her view and making her head spin. She tried to take in a deep breath, but it only made her stomach turn and the nausea increase.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked hesitatingly. “Are you alright? What’s wrong?”

“Just a little dizzy,” she replied, sending a short prayer to heaven that she wasn’t going to throw up. “I just… I just need a second.”

She blinked a few times, trying to chase the dark spots away from her view, but it didn’t work. She felt like her skin was on fire and the world around her was spinning. Her stomach was twisting and turning while cramping terribly.

“I’ll take you to the living room, so you can lie down, okay?” Oliver asked, stepping next to her.

He didn’t wait for an answer and instead just lifted her into his arms carefully. Her head dropped to his shoulder with a groan when he started walking, making her feel like she was going to throw up any second. Before that happened, he lay her down on the couch though, gently resting her head on a pillow. He lifted her feet and put them on a pile of pillows, so they were resting a little higher than her head. Felicity put her hands in front of her eyes with another groan. She couldn’t remember when she had last felt like this.

“I am going to get you a glass of water, okay?” Oliver asked, putting a hand to the crown of her head.

Felicity nodded a little, but it felt like the movement was only making the nausea worse, so she stopped. So she groaned and screw her eyes shut more firmly.

“Okay,” Oliver whispered.

She could feel him hesitating. He was still at her side with his hand on the crown of her head. Just when she was about to ask if something was wrong, she felt his lips brushing against her forehead gently. Felicity released a low sigh. The kiss was over quickly. Oliver pulled back, and without another word he left.

Felicity took in a deep breath, feeling the air fill her lungs. It didn’t ease the dizziness or nausea, though. She still felt like everything around her was spinning and that if she moved wrong, she would throw up. It was like she was drunk only that she didn’t drink any alcohol in the last days.

“Here’s the water,” Oliver stated when he reentered the room.

Felicity tried to sit up, but the dizziness and nausea made it impossible.

“I’ll help you,” Oliver hurried to say.

She felt the cushions of the couch dip when he sat down at the edge. He pushed one arm under her back and helped her sitting up, so he could slide on the couch behind her. When her back rested against his chest, he lifted the glass to her lips and with a little help of Oliver she took a few sips.

“Okay?” he asked when she turned her head away.

“Yeah,” Felicity whispered.

She heard Oliver putting the glass to the couch table. He moved to let her lie her back down, but just when he was about to slip away from behind her, a terrible pain ripped through Felicity’s stomach. She turned onto her side with a grunt of pain, almost preparing herself to vomit on the floor. Her hand reached out and gripped Oliver’s in a desperate need for help. Her other hand came to rest on her lower stomach were the cramps were coming from.

“Please don’t,” she whispered between clenched jaws. “Please don’t. Please don’t. Please don’t.”

Felicity kept her hands on her stomach, sending prayers to heaven that this wouldn’t happen and that her body was betraying her. This couldn’t be what she feared it was. Slowly the cramps eased a little, making her take in a deep breath. She was only waiting for the next cramps to appear, though. A single tear rolled down her cheek. It was a reaction of both, her fear and pain.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked after awhile.

His low voice barely broke through to her given her heaving breathing. Yet she could hear the worry in it.

He didn’t know yet. She hadn’t got around to tell him. When should she have been able to do so? As soon as he had come home and the kids had been in bed, he had started attacking her. There had been no time to tell him what she had planned on telling him tonight.

She took in another breath, but she still didn’t manage to answer. She just squeezed his hand, wordlessly telling him that she was listening.

“Felicity, are you pregnant?”

Felicity looked down at her hand on her uterus, taking in a hissing breath. When the cramps didn’t stop again, she slowly lowered her upper body on Oliver’s thighs. His arm wrapped around the back of her neck, holding her safely to him. When she looked up at him, she could see the worry in his eyes. She gulped once, clearing her throat.

Yet it was only a whisper that escaped her mouth when she spoke.

“I might be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. My wifi failed! I have the next two chapters finished, so we are safe during the weekend. ;)


	136. Wrong timing

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Oliver bit his tongue as soon as the last syllable had escaped his lips. Felicity released a low groan in response to his question, squeezing her eyes shut. Her hand tightened around the plastic cup of water he had handed her as soon as they had sat down in the hospital hallway, waiting for her to be called into the exam room.

“I wanted to,” she said, putting her hand to her forehead. “I wanted to text you, but I forgot my phone, and when I came back home, I just fell to bed and-“

“No, not about the changed dinner plans,” Oliver interrupted her a lot more gently than he had probably done the other times tonight. “Why didn’t you tell me that you thought you might be pregnant?”

During the whole drive to the hospital the question had kept spinning in his head. If she had already suspected that she was pregnant, why hadn’t she told him?

Having another baby was a sensitive subject for them. After the prenatal depression during the pregnancy with Tommy Felicity had stated that she wasn’t sure if she wanted more children because she didn’t want to go through something like that again. They had talked about it, and he had told her that he didn’t want her to be scared of anything, and after awhile she had agreed that maybe one day another baby could be part of their future. Oliver wasn’t sure if now that there might indeed be another baby on the way, Felicity was really ready to have one, though.

So maybe that was why she hadn’t told him yet. Maybe she had needed to wrap her mind around what she was going to do now. He just didn’t like the thought that she was going through a worry of that all on her own.

Felicity turned her head, looking at him with tired yet angry eyes.

“I just realized this weekend that I am late on my period, so when should I have told you?” she asked. “Between the ‘hello’ I didn’t get and your accusations?”

Oliver bit down on his tongue firmly, knowing that Felicity was right. That would have been a bad timing to tell him.

He didn’t even know what had gotten into him. When he had seen the magazine covers, it had been a stitch to his heart. Seeing Felicity look at Ray like that while they were holding hands and sitting in a nice restaurant had just hurt. He had done his best to shake that thought off because Ray and Felicity had known each other for so long already and she had even broken up with Ray to be with him instead, but…

The sight of those covers had just gotten under his skin and after hours of obsessing over what could have happened that evening, he had just exploded. And now they were sitting in the hospital, scared that they might lose a baby he had only now discovered they might have, and were barely talking to each other.

That was not how he had pictured this evening would go. When he had had his video call with Felicity the day before, and they had talked about how he might be allowed to take off her dress tonight, he had decided that it would be a perfect night to have a date with his wife. He had wanted to take Felicity out to dinner in her new dress and spoil her with a massage and a bubble bath afterwards. She had had so much work lately, and yet she never failed to make him smile whenever she came home. She deserved some good treatment.

He didn’t know what had happened that it had gone so terribly wrong and that had made him accused her of that.

“It would be nice,” Oliver whispered after awhile, and Felicity turned her head towards him once more, looking at him in question, “if we had another baby.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “ _We_? Are you sure of that? Who knows how many guys I have already slept with in the last months? Could be a mailman’s child or rather-“

“Please stop,” Oliver interrupted her, his voice barely louder than a breath. “I know you’re mad at me. You have every right to be, but please don’t.”

He could see her biting her tongue, but with a slight nod she rested her head back against the wall and closed her eyes.

“It is my baby. Of course it’s my baby. I know that.”

She took in a deep breath, slowly breathing out through her nose.

“Is it getting worse again?” he asked worriedly.

This couldn’t be good. The pain and the nausea especially given the stress he had caused her tonight… it couldn’t be good for her or the baby.

“Just feeling a little dizzy.”

“I’m going to check when the doctor is finally here. We’ve been waiting for several minutes already and-“

“The nurse said it will take a few minutes,” Felicity explained. “We can wait a little longer. It’s not that bad. I’m just a little…”

Felicity gestured with her hand in front of her face, unsure of what word to use for what was going on. Oliver sent a short prayer to heaven that nothing would happen to her or the baby. He didn’t think he’d be able to take it. Their lives were messed up as it was right now. Losing a baby would…

She would never forgive him if the stress he had caused Felicity would cause her to lose the baby. He didn’t even think he would be able to forgive himself if that happened.

“I’m sorry,” Oliver whispered, keeping his eyes on Felicity’s face, “for what I said to you. I didn’t mean to-”

“You _did_ mean to accuse me of cheating, Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him with a sigh, not opening her eyes. “You were very clear about what you thought about those photos.”

“I’m… sorry,” Oliver only repeated. “I know that nothing happened between you and Palmer because you would never cheat on me.”

“A little late for that realization.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered again, “and I’m-“

“You’ve said that several times now,” Felicity interrupted him. Her voice didn’t sound harsh, just tired and exhausted. “It doesn’t exactly make it any better.”

“Sor-“

Felicity blinked at him through one eye, and Oliver pressed his lips together and lowered his gaze. Felicity was right. He could tell her how sorry he was over and over again. It wouldn’t make anything unhappen. He had accused her of cheating and broken the trust they had established over the years.

_Great way to go, Oliver!_ , he cursed himself.

Sighing, he propped up his elbows on his knees and leaned his upper body forward. He turned his head to look at Felicity who was still sitting unmoving with her eyes closed and her head rested back against the wall. Someone who knew her any less than he knew her might think she was relaxed, but the little frown between her eyebrows and the way her hand was clenched around the fabric of her dress on her uterus let him know that she wasn’t.

He wasn’t sure if she was in pain or just not feeling well or even only angry at him, but she was most definitely not relaxed.

“Is there anything that I can-“

“Mrs. Queen?” a nurse asked, approaching them. “Dr. Mayer is now ready for you.”

Felicity got up, staggering slightly, so Oliver hurried to get up and stand right next to her. He supported her stand with a hand on her elbow, holding her upright. Together they walked to the examination room, and Oliver helped her sitting down on the med table.

“Dr. Mayer will be here any second,” the nurse explained, putting a file to the doctor’s desk and leaving with a comforting smile.

“Do you want to lie down?” Oliver asked Felicity when the door was shut behind the nurse.

“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “It makes the spinning only worse.”

“Maybe take another sip of water?” he suggested, feeling helpless.

He wanted to help her, but he had no idea what to do. Usually he would take her hand and stroke over her hair and reassure her that everything was alright, but he wasn’t sure if she would accept that right now. Felicity took the last sip of water, and Oliver took the plastic cup from her fingers and trashed it. At least he had done something now.

Silence settled again. Oliver stood next to where Felicity sat on the edge of med table. She was taking deep breaths, holding her head down. Her skin was pale, paler than he had seen it in a long time.

He thought about something to say, anything to fill the silence. It took awhile until he found something. He cleared his throat quietly before he asked, “Do you remember how when Emmy was a little younger than a year you thought you were pregnant, too?”

Felicity looked up, smiling slightly though it didn’t reach her eyes. She probably hated this waiting in silence even more than he did. “Sure. I was so disappointed when it turned out wrong.”

“So was I.”

“You saved an appointment in my appointments diary, marking the date one year later as the day we would make a baby,” Felicity added. “That was sweet.”

“You were pregnant that day already, though.”

“Yeah…”

They hadn’t exactly planned on a baby when Felicity had gotten pregnant with Tommy, but neither had they really planned a baby when Emmy had been on the way. Both times it had just happened, and they had happily accepted it. Those times had been easier, though. There had been no illegitimate child in Central City, and there had been no fight between them.

“If you’re pregnant, would you-“

Oliver’s words were interrupted once more when the door opened and a tall man in red scrubs entered the exam room, smiling at them.

“Mr. and Mrs. Queen,” he said, “I am sorry you had to wait so long. We have a busy day here.”

He approached them, shaking both of their hands, before he went to the desk and looked into the file the nurse had put there before. Oliver could see the doctor’s eyes skimming a few pages. After a few seconds that felt like hours he looked up and got back to them.

“You said when you came here that you feel dizzy and have cramps in your lower stomach and you also might be pregnant?” he asked, sitting down on a stool next to the med table and gesturing for Felicity to lie down.

Oliver helped her, making sure she could lie down slowly. He stayed at her side then, resting his hands next to her hip without touching her while observing each of the doctor’s movements carefully. He hated hospitals, and he knew that Felicity hated them even more.

“I didn’t take a test,” Felicity replied, “but I am six days late which is quite unusual for me.”

The doctor nodded. “We will take an ultrasound then to check what is going on.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, doing his best to keep his hands from shaking. Felicity meanwhile lifted the hem of her dress until her stomach was free. The doctor applied gel to her stomach, getting the ultrasound ready.

Felicity’s eyes were focused on the screen already, but her hand moved from right under her breasts to Oliver’s hand and gripped his fingers tightly. Relieved to have something he could hold onto, Oliver lifted her hand to his chest, pressing the back of her hand to his heart. His other hand moved up and down her front arm slowly, caressing her soft skin.

As soon as the picture of the ultrasound could be seen on the screen, Oliver was searching for something he could recognize, but everything just looked like dark shadows. He felt his breath getting caught in his throat and realized Felicity was holding her breath, too.

Oliver tried to concentrate on the doctor’s face, trying to read it, but his eyes snapped back to the screen again and again. He had seen first ultrasounds of Emmy and Tommy, and though there hadn’t been much to see at that time, he had always seen something. This time there was nothing, though. He felt a wave of nausea coming, fearing that the worst scenario he had pictured in the last minutes would now come to life.

“From what I can see here, I’d say everything looks pretty normal,” Dr. Mayer stated, his eyes still focused on the screen. “There are no bleedings and no tissue that doesn’t belong there.”

“So the baby is fine?” Oliver asked immediately, squeezing Felicity’s fingers.

Dr. Mayer turned the head of the ultrasound a little, pursing his lips. “The ultrasound doesn’t show any sign for a pregnancy right now.”

Oliver’s heart sank. So no baby? Had she lost it? Like… was that possible? Or-

He looked at Felicity, intending to comfort her, but froze when he saw the relief in her face. Yes, he was relieved, too. Apparently they hadn’t lost a baby. But maybe she wasn’t pregnant. The last time when a suspected pregnancy had turned out negative for them, she had cried in his arms and told him how much she would have loved to be pregnant again although it had been too soon for another baby.

“If the pregnancy is still at its start, it is possible that maybe it’s just too soon for an ultrasound. Sometimes that happens,” Dr. Mayer explained, ripping Oliver out of his thoughts. He handed Felicity some paper towels to clean up her stomach. “I suggest that we will do a blood test to check your beta-hCG. That should make sure that we aren’t missing anything.”

Felicity nodded slightly, a nervous smile on her lips. The doctor patted her shoulder shortly before he moved to one of the cupboards and got a syringe. Oliver helped Felicity to tug her dress back down and squeezed her hand. She looked at him, a questioning gaze in his eyes.

“Don’t look at the doctor,” he whispered, knowing that if she saw the syringe Dr. Mayer was holding in his hands, she would most likely panic. “Just look at me.”

When Dr. Mayer approached them, Felicity’s fingers tightened around Oliver’s, and he reached out a hand and put it to her cheek, making sure that her face was staying turned towards him and she wouldn’t see the syringe. When the tip of the syringe made contact with her skin, she flinched slightly, but she quickly took in a deep breath and held still.

The entire time her eyes stayed focused on him. They hadn’t looked at each other this long without yelling all day. The thought made Oliver’s heart skip a beat.

“Done,” Dr. Mayer said after a short time.

“Where could these symptoms come from when it’s not a miscarriage?” Oliver asked the doctor while he was putting the syringe away. “The cramps, the dizziness,…”

“The symptoms are quite unspecific. We will do some more tests, but since there is no fever…” Dr. Mayer took in a breath, looking at Felicity. “Stress maybe?”

Oliver gulped, while Felicity replied, “Yes, that might be possible.”

“Did you eat enough today?” Dr. Mayer asked further. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, shrugging her shoulders. “We are going to take a few more tests while the blood will be tested, and then we will see. For now we will lay a vitamin IV and see if that helps.”

“Okay, thanks,” Felicity replied with small voice.

Dr. Mayer smiled, turning back to get an IV ready.

Again Oliver put his hand to Felicity’s cheek, but she turned her head towards him already, her eyes focusing on his. Oliver smiled slightly, but it wasn’t returned by her. Instead she almost stared at him blankly, and as soon as the IV was laid, she pulled her hand away from his, putting it to her stomach and closing her eyes.

It made Oliver’s heart hurt uncomfortably, feeling like with every beat of his heart, someone put a dagger right through it. He squeezed his eyes shut, moving his hand through his short hair.

He had hurt Felicity a lot of times. Even before they had been together, he had hurt her by telling her they couldn’t be together. Then he had walked out on her again even though they had been married already and now… now he had even made her believe that he didn’t trust her because he had been frustrated about Central City and because he had hated knowing that Ray’s life was less complicated than his after all.

Ray had always been a sore spot for him. Since the moment Ray had asked Felicity out for a work dinner, and Oliver had seen the two of them kissing after that, Ray had been a really sore sport for him. It had only increased when Felicity and Ray had started a relationship, and he had eventually found out that Ray had a vigilante alter-ego just like he did. He hadn’t understood how Ray had just been able to decide that he could have both, a relationship and a vigilante alter-ego, when Oliver had felt unable to do so. Ray’s life had the same dangers as Oliver’s.

Not now anymore, though. If Ray had a family with Felicity now, he wouldn’t leave her every other weekend to visit his illegitimate child somewhere else.

He knew that Felicity loved him and only him. She had told him and showed him so often. He had never truly understood it though he had grown closer to getting why the longer their family had existed and the more it had expanded. The situation with William in Central City had just messed with that because he felt like Felicity deserved better. And for a second that had made him forget that Felicity just didn’t want anyone else but him.

So this time he had really screwed up.

 

 

_Thank God!_

Felicity’s words echoed through Oliver’s head again and again. They echoed through his mind on the drive home, and they echoed through his mind while he was talking to their neighbor Mrs. Hofmann who had taken care of the kids while he and Felicity had been in the hospital. And even when the door had fallen shut behind their neighbor, they still kept echoing in his head.

_Thank God!_

The words had fallen from her lips with a breathy sigh, and a relieved smile had spread on her face at the same time. She had looked at him, probably realizing that there had been a hesitating expression on his face. She had bit her bottom lip then and quickly looked away.

_Thank God!_

Oliver shook his head, taking in a deep breath, before he went upstairs where Felicity already was to check if the kids were alright. Mrs. Hoffman had said that they had slept through the entire time she had been there, so Felicity had stated that she just wanted to take a quick look at them before going to bed. At least that was what she had told their neighbor.

The hallway was empty, but the door to their bedroom had been left ajar, and he could see the light being switched on in the room. So Oliver stepped into the bedroom, finding Felicity on the edge of the bed. She was applying some crème to her face. She was already dressed in her pajamas, pajamas she actually didn’t wear often because she usually slept in one of his shirts.

“Did Mrs. Hoffman say anything more?” Felicity asked when Oliver leaned into the frame of the door, just watching her.

“No,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “I told her the allergic reaction wasn’t as bad as we have feared, and she didn’t ask any further questions.”

“Okay, that’s good,” Felicity replied.

He stayed where he was, watching Felicity some seconds longer and waiting for her to say something more. When she didn’t say anything, though, he just pushed his hands into the pockets of his hands and lowered his gaze.

He couldn’t remember the last time it had been this awkward between them. Usually one of them always knew what to say, and when there was nothing to say, they could easily endure some silence. Silence had never been a problem for them.

“Oliver?”

He lifted his gaze, looking at her. Felicity had put the crème away and was now sitting on the bed cross-legged, facing him. Her eyes were slightly narrowed at him, and her front teeth were buried in her bottom lip.

“You do know that it’s best like this, right?” she asked. “I mean… having another baby as long as the situation with Central City and… well, now with us… is so messy… it wouldn’t be good.”

Oliver nodded slowly, pushing his hands even more into the pockets of his pants.

It hadn’t been a miscarriage which was good, but Felicity hadn’t been pregnant at all which was…

He wanted another baby. He loved the thought of having another baby with Felicity. Yet he knew that now was probably not the right timing. If they had found out about it today, it wouldn’t have solved their fight. He was still disappointed that the test had come back negative, and it still hurt him how relieved she had been, though.

“Yeah, I know,” he whispered.

“I think we have enough at our hands as it is right now, and… a baby…”

“Yeah, I know,” Oliver whispered once more, even more quietly this time.

Silence settled between them again. Oliver lowered his gaze back to the carpet, trying to figure out what he should do now.

He knew Felicity was mad and disappointed because of what he had done. He understood that. He was mad and disappointed in himself. He would never be happy about Ray and Felicity being friends, but he was friends with some of his ex-partners, too, and Felicity had never minded it. He had no right to go all caveman on any of her exes, and he had no reason to hold her friendship with Ray against him. Especially because he knew that Felicity only loved him.

“I… uhm…” Oliver took in a deep breath, looking up at Felicity. “I better get my bedding down and… uhm… sleep on the couch to give you some space and… figure some things out, I guess.”

Felicity looked at him for a long moment, sucking in a deep breath that made tears spring to her eyes. She nodded, though.

“Yes, maybe that’s better.”

Oliver nodded, smiling sadly. He took the bedding from his side of the bed and walked to the door where he turned back around to her once more. Felicity had her gaze lowered to her hands, looking everything but happy.

“I know I said it before, but now that the test is negative I feel like I have to say it again to make sure that… well, that you know that I didn’t just say it because of the baby,” Oliver stated hesitatingly. “I am really sorry for what I said today.”

“Yeah, I know,” Felicity replied.

She didn’t say anything else, and she didn’t look at him. So Oliver nodded. He knew that she needed time and space. Only then would she be able to talk to him about this and hopefully forgive him. Well, or she would at least let him try to earn her forgiveness and reassure her of his trust in her.

“Night, Felicity,” he whispered.

“Night, Oliver.”

Oliver closed the door, sucking in another deep breath. He needed to fix this.


	137. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you will have noticed by now that some of the latest comments have kind of hit me pretty hard. Though after a few messages from amazing fans and other great writers who have experienced the same, it is still not exactly easy to deal with this. 
> 
> I promised updates on both Saturday and Sunday. To stay true to that, I will updated today. I will actually post three chapters because I just hope that instead of three bad reviews (one for each chapter), I might only get one. This is my way of dealing with this mess right now. 
> 
> Unfortunately, I am really discouraged about the storyline, and I feel that when you read the three chapters, you will actually see that in my writing. The heart was missing while writing which I can tell is disappointing for you and for me. 
> 
> I am just looking forward to happier times now.

Not opening her eyes, Felicity turned onto her side. She reached out her hand sleepily to seek the warmth of Oliver’s body on his side of the bed, quietly wondering why he wasn’t sleeping with his body wrapped safely around her like he usually did. All she was met with was the cold sheet of the bed, though.

“Oli-“ Felicity started calling out, sitting up in bed hurriedly.

As soon as she opened her eyes and saw that it wasn’t only Oliver, who was missing on the other side of the bed, but also his bedding, she feel silent.

“Right,” she whispered to herself, remembering that Oliver was sleeping downstairs on the couch like he had done the last five nights already.

She lay back down with a sigh, facing Oliver’s empty side of the bed. Her fingers stroked over the cold sheet longingly for a few seconds before she pulled her hand back to her chest with another sigh.

The last days had been exhausting. Work had become even crazier now that the presentation for the joint project with Wayne Enterprise was close and apart form that things between her and Oliver were still tense. They did their best to act normal in front of the kids because they shouldn’t notice any of what was going on. As soon as they were alone, though, it was getting strange between them. They didn’t talk much and when they did, it felt weird because neither of them really knew what to say. It was like if they just said one word too much, they would start fighting again and neither of them wanted that.

Felicity knew that Oliver regretted accusing her of cheating. There just had been so much frustration and insecurity been bottled up in him. When he had seen the covers of her and Ray, it had triggered these emotions to finally explode, and that was why he had said that. She was still angry at him, though. He could have and should have talked to her about that instead of leaving it all out on her.

The situation with Central City was a mess. Felicity knew that. It wasn’t easy for him. It wasn’t easy for the children, none of the three. It certainly wasn’t easy for her either, though. They were all burdened by this, but she had given her best to…

Felicity shook her head. Her mind had been spinning around the same thoughts again and again in the days. She had tried to wrap her mind around it to find a way to move past this, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t just move on from it like nothing had happened.

He had accused her of cheating. After everything they had been through, he had decided to attack her instead of talking to her. If she was only angry, it would be easy to move on. She would just pin Oliver’s photo to a box bag a hit it until all the anger was gone. She was hurt, though. She was hurt, and it wasn’t exactly easy to just move on from that.

Felicity groaned and got up. She knew that she wouldn’t fall back to sleep anytime soon and she really needed a glass of water.

She took the baby monitor that showed both kids sleeping peacefully in Tommy’s crib. Emmy had tiptoed from her room to Tommy’s as soon as she had hoped her parents would be asleep. She hadn’t noticed that Oliver was sleeping on the couch yet. When she couldn’t sleep, she usually crawled into her brother’s bed instead of her parents, and Oliver always put his bedding back to bed before he woke the kids.

Downstairs Felicity went right to the kitchen and filled a glass with some water from the kitchen sink. She leaned back against the edge of the kitchen counter, closing her eyes while taking a sip. It was a warm night and had been a warm week. It was probably the only good about Oliver not being in bed; it wasn’t as hot as it would be if he was sleeping on top her like he usually did.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Felicity glanced towards the living room. Oliver hadn’t moved when she had come downstairs. Either he didn’t want to annoy her, or he was indeed asleep which didn’t really sound believable given that Oliver had trouble sleeping, especially when she wasn’t lying next to him.

Her teeth buried a little deeper into her bottom lip. She felt tempted to go and take a look at him. She hadn’t really looked at him all week. She had seen him, but not really looked at him. It was weird but true. If she went now and he wasn’t asleep, she could say that she just wanted to check if he didn’t suffer from a nightmare. That way she didn’t have to give in and admit that she missed him. It was terribly childish, but she couldn’t help herself.

Felicity tiptoed towards the living room and glanced over the backrest of the couch and gasped for breath quietly at what she saw.

Oliver was asleep, but he looked everything but relaxed or peaceful. His eyes were screwed shut, and a deep frown had formed on his forehead. His face glistened with sweat, and his shirt was soaked through by it. His whole body was shaking slightly. Oliver was caught in a nightmare and if the pained expression on his face was any indication, it was a particularly terrible one.

Felicity already reached out her hand to stroke it over the side of his face, but she pulled it back before her fingers could made contact with his skin. She could get Oliver to calm down with touches when he had fallen asleep next to her. If he hadn’t, though, he would most likely attack her for thinking she was attacking him.

“Oliver,” she said out loud. “Oliver, you need to wake up.”

She waited for Oliver’s reaction, but instead of opening his eyes, he moved his head from one side to the other quickly. His frown deepened, and a small whimper escaped his lips.

Felicity felt her heart breaking for Oliver. She knew he had nightmares, and she knew they were getting worse when she wasn’t sleeping next to him. He was sometimes disoriented then and felt thrown back in time. She was hurt about what he had said, but she didn’t want him to suffer like this. He didn’t deserve that.

“Oliver,” Felicity said louder this time. “Oliver, you have to wake up.”

He didn’t wake up, though. He only whimpered once more while his body was shaking heavier now. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, thinking about what to do. If she touched him and he attacked her, he would blame himself. If she didn’t wake him up, though, he would most likely hurt himself sooner or later.

Looking down on the half-full glass of water in her hand, Felicity pressed her lips together. Without wasting another thought she emptied the liquid over Oliver’s face. Gasping for breath, he sat up. His arms moved out wildly like he was trying to find anything to hold onto. His wide eyes were staring into the darkness, trying to orientate himself. He was breathing wildly gasping for breath like a drowning man.

“Oh frack,” Felicity whispered. “The Gambit.”

Immediately she let the empty glass fall to the end of the couch and slid down the backrest, so she was sitting in Oliver’s lap. She pressed his head to her chest, making his ear rest right above her heart, and wrapped her arms around his neck securely.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered urgently. “I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I didn’t think about the Gambit for a second. I am so sorry. You’re home. You’re safe. I am so sorry.”

It took a few second until Oliver’s muscles relaxed. While his arms were wrapping around her waist tightly, his body melted against hers. She rested her chin on the crown of his head, massaging the tight muscles at the back of his neck. Oliver meanwhile turned his head and pressed his nose against her chest, breathing her in.

“I’m so sorry,” Felicity repeated, stroking her right hand through his short hair. She knew that he needed the feeling of home and safety when he woke up from a nightmare, and he certainly needed it right now after she had accidentally made it worse. She just hadn’t thought about it. “I’m so sorry.”

Her heart was beating as wildly as Oliver’s did in response to what had just happened, but slowly both of their heartbeats slowed down again. She could feel Oliver’s heartbeat against her rips, adjusting to hers. They breathed heavily, but in synch. Closing her eyes, Felicity took in a deep breath, and she felt Oliver doing the same.

She hated when he had nightmares. She hated how lost he felt when waking up. This was the only good she could find about the nightmares; that all he needed was her to calm down again. She would gladly go without that if that meant that Oliver wouldn’t have nightmares anymore, though. They always were hard on him, waking up the nightmares he had lived through since the night the Gambit had went down.

For several minutes neither of them said a word. Felicity just held Oliver against her, stroking her hands up and down his back and rocking him back and forth slightly. It was the first comfortable silence they had shared in days.

“You okay?” she whispered after awhile.

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered back with husky voice.

His arms tightened around her waist for a short moment, and she felt his nose pressing against her cleavage to breathe her in once more. Slowly he unwrapped his arms from around her waist, intending to move away, but Felicity kept him to her.

“It’s okay. Just stay here a little longer,” she whispered. “Or do you want a new shirt and-“

“No,” Oliver said quickly, wrapping his arms back around her body. “I want to stay here.”

Felicity stroked her hand over his hair once more, comforting him. She knew he had wanted to pull back out of respect for her and their fight. He didn’t want her to feel urged to share any intimacy with him when she wasn’t ready. Oliver was a guy like that. Felicity felt like a nightmare was weighing heavier than the fight they had had, though. He shouldn’t have to go through this alone, and he wouldn’t have to.

Oliver had suffered through so many nights of nightmares on his own. It made Felicity’s stomach twist just thinking about it. When they had gotten together, she had sworn to herself that she was never again letting him suffer through a nightmare alone, so she wouldn’t.

“I-“ Oliver started, but his voice break. He took in a deep breath before he tried again. “I dreamt about losing you.”

Felicity tightened her arms around him, sighing quietly. She pressed her lips to his temple and gently stroked her hand over the back of his head, playing with some strands of his short hair. There were a lot of different things that tortured him in his nightmares. He dreamt about the Gambit and his five years away. He dreamt about the people he had lost and all the bad stuff that had happened ever since. He also dreamt about things that had not happened to him yet, but that he feared would happen with time. One of that had always been losing her.

“I am here,” she whispered. “I am here. You’re not losing me to any bad guy, okay? No bad guy will-“

“It was not about a bad guy,” Oliver explained.

When he pulled back this time, she let him. Oliver leaned back enough, so he could look at her, but their chests kept pressing to each other’s. Gently Felicity moved her fingers over Oliver’s face, wiping some sweat and water from his face. He leaned into her touch, closing his eyes with a sigh.

“If it wasn’t about a bad guy, then what was it about?” Felicity asked when Oliver didn’t continue speaking.

“You left me,” he whispered, not opening his eyes, “said marriage was about inclusion, and I couldn’t give you that.”

Felicity pursed her lips and cocked her head slightly. She watched the pained expression on Oliver’s face. And though she was still hurt about his words from a few evenings ago, she felt sorry for him.

“Oliver, our fight isn’t about the fact that I am not included in your son’s life,” Felicity explained, feeling like now seemed to be the perfect timing to talk things out. “That sucks and sooner or later it might have led to a fight, but right now it’s not about that. The situation might have been part of the reason it happened, but it’s not our main problem right now.”

Oliver lowered his gaze, nodding. “I know.”

“I just don’t get why…” Felicity took in a deep breath. They should stop with the reproaches and accusations. It wasn’t going to help them move past this. “What you said hurt me. It feels like you don’t trust me.”

“I do trust you,” Oliver whispered with low voice.

Felicity pursed her lips. “It didn’t really feel that way.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered with a nod of his head. He took one of her hands from his back and lifted it to his lips to kiss her knuckles. “I know it seemed like I don’t trust you, but actually it’s myself I don’t trust.”

“What do you mean?” Felicity asked, knowing very well that usually the only person Oliver really trusted was himself. It was one of the many things his five years away had taught him. There was nobody he could trust but himself.

“I don’t trust myself to be good enough for you,” he explained.

“We are past this, Oliver,” Felicity said with a low sigh. “Years ago I understood… well, maybe not understood… but…  I knew where that was coming from, but not anymore. We are married. We have children. We-“

“The situation has changed, though,” Oliver interrupted her gently. “With me traveling to Central City again and again…”

“That doesn’t change bond we are sharing, though. It doesn’t change the choices we made about sharing our lives and being a family. We are stronger than that,” Felicity stated firmly. “Or at least I thought we were.”

Oliver pursed his lips, lowering his gaze. With a quiet sigh he leaned his head forwards, so his forehead rested against her upper chest. She felt his lips pressing against her skin right above her heart. They lingered there for a couple of seconds.

Felicity moved her hand into Oliver’s hair and gently tugged at a few strands to make him pull back. She needed to look him in the eyes when they continued to talk.

“Oliver, I trust you,” Felicity said firmly. “I trust you to love me and to love our kids. I trust you to not neglect us though you figured out that you have another child. I trust you to go visit William each other weekend without… I don’t know… starting an affair or whatever with Samantha though she is your ex. I trust you with all of that and more. And I need you to trust me the same.”

For a long moment they just looked into each other’s eyes without saying a word. It gave them the time they needed to really take the words in.

“And what’s maybe even more important,” Felicity continued after awhile, “is that I need you to trust yourself that you are enough for me.”

Oliver took in a sharp breath. A small, sad smile was playing on his lips.

“I love you, Oliver,” Felicity stated, “and I understand that you need me to reassure you that my heart is yours and only yours from time to time. We all need that reassurance once in awhile, I guess. I can’t reassure you of the whole thing every time, though. What kind of marriage do we have if we can’t get through a little rough patch?”

Oliver nodded. “I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry.”

Felicity put her hand to his cheek, letting his stubble scratch the tips of her fingers gently. “I know.”

She did know. She did know how sorry he was, or at least she had an idea of it. All she had needed had been that he understood how she felt, and she knew he did now. There wasn’t really more they could do about this now.

“About what I said about... rethinking our marriage,” Oliver said after awhile, clearing his throat and looking at her with pleading eyes.

“I didn’t mean it,” Felicity hurried to say. “It was meant as a wake-up call to-“

“I didn’t mean it, either,” Oliver interrupted her quickly. “I was just so… so…”

He gestured with his hands around his head, and Felicity nodded, understanding the lack of words for whatever had gotten into him.

“And about Ray…”

“I know there is nothing going on between the two of you,” Oliver hurried to say. “You don’t need to explain anything.”

“I just…” Felicity started, but fell silent. She took in a deep breath that she released with a sigh. “I know Ray is a sore spot for you.”

Oliver lowered his gaze once more, but it only lasted a second. When he looked back up again, he had his lips pressed together, looking uncomfortable. Felicity knew the uncomfortable feeling he had about her and Ray would never completely go away. She needed him to trust her about that, though. She needed to know that he could trust her with that.

“He’s my friend, though, and-“

“I know,” Oliver interrupted her. “I’ve gone too far.”

“Yes,” Felicity replied. “I am sorry you got the impression that I was doing anything behind your back, though. I know it might have looked… bad.”

“The situation was just unfortunate.”

“I guess it was.”

They both nodded, just looking at each other. That was how they solved problems, Felicity thought. They solved problems by talking it out instead of yelling at each other. That had always been them. From the moment they had gotten together that had been their way of dealing with things.

For a long moment they were just looking into each other’s eyes longingly without saying a word, enjoying the newly discovered intimacy between them. Felicity’s hand caressed the side of his face, smiling at the feeling of his stubble against her fingertips. Oliver’s hands moved up and down her back, sliding under the fabric of his shirt on her body and eliciting goosebumps where he touched her.

It was Oliver who found his voice again first. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

They gazed into each other’s eyes for a moment longer before Felicity leaned down and brushed her lips against Oliver’s gently. They touched twice before Oliver moved the hand to the back of her head and made her hold still, so he could straighten up and press his lips against her in a firm but gentle kiss.

Felicity pressed herself against Oliver, so she was as close as possible to him. She hated being apart from him, whether it was physically or emotionally. She just felt the most comfortable when they were one.

When Oliver’s tongue opened her lips to him, Felicity sighed into the kiss. She tightened her arms around his neck, angling his head to deepen the kiss. Their lips parted when the need for air grew. Their foreheads kept in touch, resting against one another, while they were catching their breaths.

“You are my always, you know that?”

“Yes, I know.” Felicity smiled against his lips. “And you are mine.”

Their lips met in another gentle kiss. When they pulled apart this time, Felicity could feel Oliver’s facial expression change under her fingers. She could feel the frown on his forehead even before she saw it when she opened her eyes.

“I was disappointed when the pregnancy test turned out negative,” Oliver whispered without her having to ask.

Sighing, Felicity stroked her hand through his hair. “I know. I still thinks it’s better this way.”

Oliver took in a deep breath before he stated, “Your reaction… it… scared me a little bit because you were so… relieved without any sadness and…”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders, the frown deepening. Felicity stroked her hand over the back of his head once more. She knew exactly how much he loved that. He enjoyed that caress.

“I wouldn’t mind another baby, hon,” Felicity explained. “I think I even want one more, but not now. You are feeling guilty about leaving every other weekend as it is. It would only be worse if I was pregnant.”

Besides, Felicity wasn’t sure if she could be that understanding if she was indeed pregnant. She accepted that he left her every other weekend right now, but that sacrifice would be so much harder to make if she was pregnant.

“I think that our situation is exhausting and complicated as it is and a baby-“

“-would make it even more complicated, I know,” Oliver interrupted her with a sad smile. He kissed her collarbone gently before he looked up at her again and asked, “Maybe next time?”

“Maybe next time,” Felicity agreed with a smile, nodding her head. “And now we will go to bed to catch some sleep, okay?”

“Are you sure?” he asked. “I understand if you need a little more time. The couch is not as bad as it looks and-“

“Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him, “I still need time, but… get you bedding and come to bed.”

Oliver smiled. “Okay.”

While they were strolling upstairs, Oliver made a decision. Something needed to change, and it needed to change soon. He loved Felicity. She was his always. She had so many sacrifices for him, and that just needed to change now.


	138. A step forward

Felicity glanced at her watch and sighed when she realized that it was already nine p.m. These crazily long hours of work just had to end soon, or she would go crazy. With the important presentation in Gotham being delayed for a week from next weekend to the one after that and the additional work she had to do until then she would have to force herself through another couple of long days apparently, though.

There was still some work to do. She had even brought some of it with her to work on it, but tonight she would just go upstairs and fall right into bed Felicity decided when she unlocked the front door with a yawn. On her way home she had debated with herself if she should work a couple of hours more or maybe take a bubble bath, but she just wanted to sleep. She would probably fall asleep soon anywhere, and it should rather be in her bed instead of at the desk over her work or in the bathtub.

Felicity closed the door behind her and dropped her keys into the small bowl on the table next to it. She turned towards the commode, dropping her purse and her summer coat there. When she lifted her gaze to the mirror, taking in her tired face, she groaned quietly. As soon as the presentation was over, she would take a few days off and just-

“Hey, I-“

Her heart made a jump right into her throat and, gasping for breath, Felicity turned around on her heels. She almost expected to see… well, she didn’t know who exactly she had expected. There were so many bad guys in their lives it wasn’t easy to decide which one of them could be attacking this time.

Instead of Slade or Cupid or whoever else could have interest in destroying her family it was Oliver who stood in the door to the kitchen, though. He had his hands lifted like a caught criminal and was looking at her with wide eyes.

“Oliver,” Felicity sighed out, pressing her hand to her wildly beating heart. “Oh my god, your ninja skills are going to kill me one day.”

Oliver cleared his throat, trying to hide his amusement. The smile that was forming on his lips gave him away, though. Felicity cocked her head, perking up an eyebrow at him.

“Sorry,” Oliver hurried to say, obviously suppressing a chuckle.

“What are you doing here anyway?” Felicity asked. “Shouldn’t you be in Central City? I thought your flight was arriving tomorrow at noon.”

“I came back early,” Oliver replied, looking uncomfortable.

Felicity frowned. Oliver had never come back early from Central City. He didn’t get to see William often. One in two weekends really wasn’t much, so of course he tried to take as much time as possible when he flew to see his son.

Before she got to ask him if anything happened, though, Oliver had already approached her. He wrapped his arms around her small waist, pulling Felicity flush against his broad chest. Slowly he ducked his head, leaning in for a kiss without touching her lips with his. So Felicity straightened up onto her tiptoes and, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly, closed the distance by pressing her lips to Oliver’s in a lingering kiss.

They had made up from their fight though it was still anything but forgotten. After they had talked it out, they had just tried to move past it which was easier said than done. Fighting again and again about the same things would not lead them anywhere but back into more fighting, though. Oliver was sleeping upstairs in their bed again, and the tension between them had decreased. What’s left was a bitter taste of a still not completely solved problem at the tip of their tongues and a stitch of hurt in Felicity’s heart every once in a while.

“Hello,” Oliver whispered against her lips when he broke the kiss.

Felicity smiled. She was sure that Oliver’s ‘hello’ was a result of the words she had told him in the hospital, complaining that he hadn’t even said ‘hello’ when he had come back from the last visit in Central City because he had attacked her immediately instead. He always remembered those details and fixed them when he got the chance to. It would probably be harder to try and forgive him if it was different.

Oliver leaned back a little more, so he could look at her. His deep blue eyes were focused on her face, and the tips of his fingers followed where his eyes took in the dark shadows under her eyes.

“I dropped of the kids at Thea’s place and cooked dinner,” he whispered after awhile, playing with Felicity’s ponytail. “I know it’s late, but I figured you probably wouldn’t have eaten much today. If you’re too tired, though…”

“I was, but thanks to the heart attack you gave me, I am wide awake now,” Felicity teased before the hidden meaning of Oliver’s words caught up to her, and she frowned. “How much earlier did you get home that you had time to prepare dinner?”

Again Oliver looked uncomfortable. Felicity knew that he had most definitely not just come home early because he had felt like it. Something had happened, and it couldn’t be anything good.

“Oliver, what happened in Central City?” she asked worriedly.

 “Nothing we have to talk about right now,” Oliver replied, shaking his head with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He took her hand and pulled her into the kitchen. “Make yourself comfortable while I will serve the dinner. Would you like a glass of wine to-“

“Oliver.”

At the firmness of Felicity’s voice Oliver froze. He was standing at the kitchen counter with the bottle of wine in his hand already. He had his back turned towards her, but Felicity could see his struggle. With a sigh he dropped his head forward, admitting defeat, before he slowly turned back around to Felicity. He leaned against the edge of the kitchen counter, putting his hands next to his hips.

“I got into a fight with Samantha.”

Felicity bit back the comment that she wasn’t surprised by that at all. The last time Oliver had tried to talk to Samantha about changing the visiting situation it had ended in a fight, too. She just sucked in a deep breath, though, and waited for Oliver to say something more.

“I told her that we need to change something about the situation because I couldn’t keep traveling to Central City every other weekend. At least not without you. And that has nothing to do with not trusting you,” Oliver quickly added. “I don’t want you with me to control you. I-“

“I know,” Felicity interrupted him. Oliver took in another deep breath, nodding slowly. He didn’t say anything else, though, so Felicity asked, “I guess she said no?”

Oliver sighed. “She thinks it’s too early. Getting to know me and the kids would have been a big step already, but…”

“Yeah…” Felicity whispered.

She lowered her gaze, looking at the floor. She understood Samantha’s hesitation, but she actually started wondering if she intended to ever change anything about this situation. Oliver had been seeing William for like half a year now. When would she finally decide that she could trust him to not just disappear from her son’s life?

“I told her I will call a lawyer.”

Felicity lifted her gaze, looking at Oliver with wide eyes. “You what?”

“I am William’s father. I have rights,” Oliver stated. “And I will fight for these rights now. I accepted Samantha’s way because of what my mother did, but it’s been long enough now. William is Samantha’s son, but he is also mine and that makes him part of this family. That means he should be here even if it’s only every other weekend. So I told her that I will call a lawyer, and she kicked me out.”

Felicity looked at him, biting her tongue. She couldn’t exactly say that he was wrong. Legally speaking, Oliver had rights and should be able to take those. He had tried to go the way that had seemed to be the best for Samantha to show his good will because of what his mother had done, but he was tired of that. Felicity understood that.

“You look like you are going to tell me that that has been wrong,” Oliver said after awhile, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I am right, though? Right?”

Felicity smiled, approaching him. She put her hands to his chest and looked up at him.

“You think I am wrong,” Oliver stated, looking into her eyes.

“I don’t think it’s necessarily wrong,” Felicity countered. “I understand that you want… I don’t even know what you want… joint custody maybe?”

“First I will have to be officially established as William’s father, but after that, yes,” Oliver replied, nodding his head.

“And you told Samantha that that is what you want?” Felicity asked. “Joint custody?”

“Yes.”

Felicity pursed her lips, thinking about how to tell Oliver that, though she understood where that wish was coming from and it was actually his legal right to want this, it might not have been his best idea.

“Oliver,” Felicity said slowly. “If I got the feeling that someone, including you, was trying to take Emmy and Tommy from me, do you know what I would do? I would take the kids, run and hide at a place where you would never find me.”

Oliver slid his arms around Felicity’s waist. “We both know that I would never be able to find you, if you didn’t want to be found. Samantha’s not you, though. She doesn’t have your technical skills. She couldn’t just disappear from the radar like you would be able to.”

“That’s right,” Felicity agreed with a sigh. She moved her hands over Oliver’s chest to his shoulders, entwining her fingers behind his neck. “Look, Oliver, if you really want to do this, I’ll support you. I am always on your side, so I will be on your side in this, but…”

“You don’t think it’s a good idea,” Oliver completed her sentence, looking at her with an expression of slight disappointment.

“I think that for a child it’s never easy to be torn between two parents, and I think that is what would happen to William if you did this,” Felicity explained, leaning closer to him. “I know that this is your legal right, but I don’t think the law will help here. It might agree with you that you have the right to see William more often and to be included in making decisions for his life, but I don’t think that will help you to deepen your relationship to him. If it drives a wedge between Samantha and you, it will drive one between you and William, too. Even if Samantha tries her best to not let show how much she suffers from the situation, William will know. Kids of his age realize such things.”

Oliver lowered his gaze, nodding quietly. “I feel like we are at the end of a one-way-street. I agreed to Samantha’s deal, and now there is nothing I can do to move forward.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered.

She straightened up onto her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around Oliver’s neck tightly to pull him into a comforting hug. Oliver lowered his head to her shoulder, nuzzling the side of her neck. Slowly Felicity rubbed her hands up and down his back, feeling his tense muscles beneath her palms.

“If you want to go through with this, though, I understand. It is your decision,” Felicity said quietly, “and I am on your side no matter how you decide. I hope you know that.”

“I know that,” Oliver replied, tightening his arms around her waist for a short moment. When he pulled back, Felicity saw tears in his eyes. She put her hands to his cheeks, framing his face, and immediately Oliver leaned into the touch with a sigh. “I just don’t know what to do. If I am suing for custody, I might risk the relationship I have already built to William, but if I do nothing… I can’t continue keeping you out of that part of my life. I hate it.”

“I know,” Felicity said with a sigh. “I know.”

“So if I don’t sue for joint custody,” Oliver said after awhile, “what do I do then?”

“In that case you should call Samantha tomorrow and explain why you said that,” Felicity replied. “If we are communicating like this, we work. I think you need to build some way of communication with Samantha, too. She needs to understand that you don’t want to take William from her. You just want to be more included, and you need a sign that she does trust you will William and that she will let him be a part of our family, too.”

Oliver nodded slowly. Sighing, he tightened his arms around her waist and pecked her lips with his.

“What would I do without you?”

“Well, you’d probably be dead because your mother shut you years ago?”

Oliver chuckled. “Yeah, probably.”

Smiling, Felicity straightened up onto the tips of her toes and kissed Oliver once more. Her tongue traced the seam between his lips, making him open up to her. Oliver pulled her bottom lip between his for a moment, sucking slightly. When their lips broke apart, Oliver rested his forehead against Felicity’s.

“Do you still want dinner?”

“How about dinner in bed?”

Oliver pulled back slightly. “Actual dinner or dessert?”

“Dessert sounds great.

Oliver nodded. “You go to bed and make yourself comfortable, and I will come and serve you the dessert. Chocolate lava cake.”

“That sounds delicious,” Felicity said, humming. “I am going to wait for dessert in bed.”

“Don’t fall asleep until I get there,” Oliver called after her when she had just stepped out of the kitchen.

Felicity turned back around, smiling at him from the door. “I would promise you I won’t, but I am not sure that I will be able to keep that promise.”

Oliver smiled. “I’ll put the cake into the fridge in case you are asleep when I get upstairs. We can still eat it tomorrow.”

“Great,” Felicity said. “See you later.”

“Or not, I guess?”

“Or not,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, turning around and heading upstairs. She knew that she would probably be asleep as soon as her head had hit the pillow, so she added half-way up the stairs, “Night, Oliver.”

 

 

Felicity watched Oliver walking up and down in the living room, his frown deepening with each step he took. She bit down on her bottom lip, waiting to figure out what was going on.

“Samantha, that doesn’t help me,” Oliver replied to whatever Samantha was saying.

When he turned around on his heels to change direction, his eyes met Felicity’s gaze. He rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

“Okay, definitely not going well,” Felicity muttered to herself.

“Because this is not about that,” Oliver stated, his voice getting angrier. “This is about-“

When he walked past Felicity, she quickly caught his hand to get his attention. Oliver looked at her with a questioning frown on his face. Felicity took in a deep breath, gesturing him to do the same. Oliver rolled his eyes once more, at her this time, but he took a deep breath and followed her example.

Felicity smiled. Losing all chill was not going to help here. Oliver was angry for not being more included, and Samantha was probably scared because she thought that Oliver was going to take William from her. If those two emotions collided, it wasn’t going to end well.

Sighing, Oliver sat down on the backrest of the couch and started stroking his hand through Felicity’s blonde hair. His eyes were gentle as they focused on her face. Felicity rested her chin on his thigh, observing the play of his facial expression while he was continue to comb his fingers through her hair and talk to Samantha.

“Listen,” he said with a quiet sigh, his voice sounding a lot less angry. “I understand that you feel the need to protect William, but he is also my son. I would never let anything happen to him. I just… I need a sign that we are making some progress.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes, listening to what Samantha said. He pressed his lips together, not making a sound.

“That… doesn’t really feel like any progress,” Oliver replied before he sighed after another long pause. “Yeah, fine. I need to discuss this with Felicity first, but I’ll call you back.”

Oliver hung up, dropping his phone to the couch with a sigh. He put his hand to Felicity’s cheek and bent down to kiss her gently. His lips brushed against the tip of her nose and her forehead when he straightened back up.

“So what did she say?”

Oliver sighed. “She suggests that the next visit will take place here in Starling instead of Central City. She still doesn’t want you to meet him, though.”

“Well, I wasn’t really expecting anything else,” Felicity replied. When Oliver frowned at her in question, she added, “It would have been a complete turn, wouldn’t it?”

“I had hope for at least some kind of progress, but this is… She wants to change the arrangement without making any…” Oliver broke off, shaking his head. “It feels like taking a step to the side instead of a step forwards.”

Felicity moved her legs beneath her, sitting back on her heels. She took his hand, squeezing. Oliver looked at her, his sad eyes focusing on her face.

“It is a step forward, Oliver, even if it’s only a tiny one,” Felicity explained. “William is coming here in our house. This is our home. It’s where we live. And it’s away from Samantha. This is a step forward.”

“A tiny one,” Oliver repeated.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Even tiny steps get us forward, don’t they?”

“So you think I should agree to this?”

“At the end it’s your choice, but I think that is what you should do, yes.”

“Fine, I’ll call her.” Oliver sighed. When he reached down to take the phone, he brushed his lips against hers. “Let’s hope that there will be a big step after next weekend.”

“Next weekend?” Felicity asked.

“Yes, I don’t want to kick you out of your own home, so I suggest I invite William over this weekend when you’re in Gotham,” Oliver explained, already dialing the number. “Since the last weekend has been cut short, I feel like I deserve an extra one, though. I had no time to enjoy spending time with him.”

He pecked her lips for a short second before he made the call, not giving Felicity the chance to tell him that the trip was delayed. She bit down on her bottom lip, watching Oliver.

Maybe he was right and after the weekend William would spend here, Samantha would agree to move further forward. The sooner that happened, the better. It was worth staying one weekend away if only her whole family could be united soon after that.

Besides, moving past what had happened really wasn’t easy. She had tried to move on from this because she didn’t want her family to fall apart. The hurt about Oliver’s behavior still hurt deep, though. So maybe this little break would be just what she needed.


	139. Breaking point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said - this chapter misses the heart. And it is really messy because all of the comments irritated me, so I didn’t write what I actually wanted and this mess is the result…
> 
> IMPORTANT NOTE: THE LAST THREE CHAPTERS ARE ALL NEW! I FEEL THIS LEADS TO CONFUSION!

“Oh, honey, that really sounds like a complicated situation,” Donna said and gently stroked her hand over her daughter’s hair like she had already done when Felicity had been a little girl and heartbroken about not being able to go to space camp for vacation.

Felicity had arrived in Vegas the evening before, and she knew that Donna had been suspicious about that spontaneous visit from the start. Felicity hadn’t come to Vegas often yet and when she had, she had usually brought Oliver and the kids with her. So the evidence for something being wrong had been there even before Felicity had burst out in tears during breakfast and told her everything – from how much the situation with William in Central City really burdened her over Oliver’s accusations and the pregnancy scare up to the now changed deal with William visiting Oliver in Starling.

“You know, I’ve been supportive of this situation because I don’t want to make it any harder for Oliver than it already is, but then he accused me of cheating,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. She took in a sobbing breath before she continued, “And now I am trying to forgive him… or… I don’t know… this isn’t that much about the accusation than about… I don’t know… I am just trying to go back to the way things were, but I am starting to wonder how long this is going to continue? I have snowed myself in with work the last couple of months, and it worked, but the preparations for the project are almost done now which means I won’t have to do that much work anymore after next weekend and-“

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, wiping her tears away from her cheeks.

She hadn’t intended to tell her mother all of that, but she just hadn’t been able to hold back any longer. Once the first tear had fallen, a lot more had followed.

“Did you tell Oliver any of this?” Donna asked.

“To make it any harder for him than it already is?” Felicity asked.

She knew Oliver was suffering from the situation. He had never liked it. He had always hoped there would be some change that would finally let her in on what was going on in Central City through more than just what he told her. She knew that, but it didn’t make it any easier for her.

“Felicity, you have to tell Oliver that.”

“I can’t,” Felicity replied with a groan.

“If he doesn’t know how much this burdens you-“

“It’s not important how much this burdens me right now,” Felicity explained. “This is not just about me. This is about the kids in the first place, and as long as they don’t suffer from this…  I am an adult. I need to be able to take this. I-“

“Felicity,” her mother interrupted her firmly, and Felicity felt silent. “Honey, I am going to ask you something now, and I will know if you’re trying to lie to me.”

Felicity gulped. She suddenly felt like an eight-year-old that was accused of stealing some bubble gum. She nodded, though. Her mother hadn’t talked strictly to her often, but when she had done, it had mostly been before or during a heart-to-heart.

“Do you feel like you are taking Oliver from William when you ask him or even just let him do something that… changes the deal or anything?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, lowering her gaze. “William is a child. He needs his dad. He needs both his parents.”

Donna looked at her daughter for a long moment, not saying a word. Slowly she then took the mug of warm milk from her daughter’s hands and put it to the nightstand. She squeezed Felicity’s hands comfortingly, making her daughter look up at her.

“Felicity, I think we both know how much you suffered when your dad left us,” Donna stated quietly. “It has always been an issue for you, and I really understand that. But here is the thing. You can’t allow the pain you felt as a child to let you sacrifice everything you need for your well-being, honey. You are not taking Oliver from William. It is not your fault he has been living without his father for so long, and it is not your fault the situation between his parents is this messed up. You should support him as much as you can, but you have gone far beyond that. You have gone beyond your breaking point, and that is not healthy. Not for you. Not for your marriage. Not for your kids.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, feeling some weight lifting from her chest. She had pushed those thoughts away from her for so long now. They had almost buried her.

“So what do you think I should do now? Tell Oliver that I decided otherwise and he should sue for shared custody?” Felicity asked.

“I think the first thing you have to do is tell him how you feel,” Donna explained. “As long as the two of you are not honest with each other about what you are feeling, this situation can never get resolved. And then you have to sit William’s mother down and the three of you together need to discuss how you can make it work for all of you.”

“William is their kids, Oliver’s and Samantha’s. I shouldn’t-“

“-interfere in that?” Donnas asked, perking up an eyebrow. “I’d agree if it didn’t have such an influence on you and your family.”

Felicity nodded slowly, looking down at her fingers that were linked with her mothers.

She didn’t want William to lose Oliver. She didn’t want Oliver to lose William. She didn’t want to lose Oliver either, though. And sooner or later she feared that would be exactly what would happen if things didn’t change for the better soon. She had no idea how she had been able to keep this to herself and in the back of her mind for so long without her head having exploded.

“I-“ The ringing of her phone interrupted Felicity. She pulled it from the nightstand, looking at the caller’s name on display. “It’s Oliver.”

“Maybe you don’t tell him on the phone,” Donna suggested.

Felicity rolled her eyes, taking the phone. “Hey, hon. How is your weekend going?”

“Mrs. Queen?”

Felicity sat up. She frowned at the child’s voice.

“Hello?” she asked.

“Hi… here’s… here’s William,” the boy answered with hesitation in his voice. “I… uhm…”

“William, what’s wrong?” Felicity asked when William’s voice broke with a sob. She felt her heart skipping a beat.

“There has been an accident,” he responded with another sob. “We’re in the hospital. Dad is… I don’t know… he’s in surgery I think.”

 

 

Felicity was sweaty and out of breath when she arrived at the third floor of the hospital where the woman at the front desk had told her she would find someone who could tell her where exactly Oliver was and how he was doing. As soon as she had left the staircase, she saw a nurse working on a computer and ran towards her, not caring about the terrible stitches in her side.

“Hi. Sorry. My husband, Oliver Queen, was brought here,” she told her though the words could barely be understood between the gasps for breath. “I don’t know what happened. He was… in an accident or something I think and…”

The nurse, a young woman with long blonde hair, looked at Felicity with perked up eyebrows. Felicity knew the gaze. It had been awhile since someone had looked at her like that, but she remembered the expression from those times.

“Okay, I know what is going on in your head. _Wow! That is Ollie Queen’s wife? Can’t he get someone much better? Prettier who doesn’t look like a crazy ghost?_ To answer that, yes, he could have someone who looks like model, but he doesn’t want to. He wants me. Understood? Fine. Can you now please tell me where my husband is?”

“He’s… uhm… He just got out of surgery,” the nurse explained. “He has some bruises on his back, and his leg needed to be reduced. Furthermore he has a head injury that needed some stitches. The neurologic check didn’t show any permanent damage, though. He is going to be fine. You can see him in a couple of minutes.”

Felicity nodded and sighed in relief. “Good. Where are my kids?”

“The little ones are in day care downstairs. They were checked through, but they are fine. The older one sits right there,” the nurse said, nodding her head, before she quickly disappeared.

Felicity turned around to where the nurse had nodded. And indeed she could find William sitting on one of the seats at the wall. He had his legs pulled to his chest with his arms wrapped around them. Felicity didn’t think there was any more heartbreaking view for a mother.

“Hi, William,” she said, sitting down next to him.

“You’re Mrs. Queen, right?” he asked. “I saw photos of you.”

Felicity smiled. “Please just call me Felicity. Mrs. Queen sounds like I am my mother-in-law, and I really don’t want to be my mother-in-law.”

William didn’t say anything. He just nodded and lowered his gaze back down.

“Did you call your mother?” she asked gently and William nodded. Felicity pursed her lips, unsure of what to say. William didn’t know her, so how was she supposed to comfort him? Clearing her throat, she asked, “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

“It’s my fault,” William muttered, tears springing to his blue eyes. “I… I was playing ball with Emmy and Tommy, and… dad told me to be careful, but the ball rolled away and Tommy ran right behind it before I could stop him and then there was a car…”

William sobbed, hiding his face in his hands. Felicity stroked her hand over his hair like Donna had done for her before. William let it happen. He even leaned closer towards her, resting his head on her shoulder as he cried.

“I guess Oliver grabbed Tommy and was hit by a car?” Felicity asked, seeing the scene right in front of her like it was just now happening.

For the break of a second she wondered if Tommy was okay, but given that he was in day care instead of in a hospital room, she assumed he was okay. Besides, the nurse had mentioned that he and Emmy had been checked through, so she would just trust that result. She didn’t even want to think about what would have happened if her baby boy had been hit by a car.

William nodded. “I didn’t want this. I-“

“Hey, this is not your fault,” Felicity interrupted him. “Accidents happen and Oliver didn’t want you to blame yourself for this. It’s really not your fault.”

“It’s not?”

“No, of course not,” Felicity replied. “Tommy is a wild one.”

William pulled back slightly, looking at her with Oliver’s deep blue eyes.

“Dad said that you are a nice person, the best even,” William told her. “You really seem nice.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied with a smile. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Oliver told me a lot about you.”

“He talks about you almost all the time when he is visiting me.”

“Yes?” Felicity asked, her smile widening slightly.

“Yeah,” William replied. “He is so into you. If he doesn’t make it-“

Felicity pulled William back against her, giving him a comforting hug.

“Don’t go there,” she whispered into his hair. “The nurse said he is going to be fine. Besides, Oliver has been through worse, and he always makes it.”

William cried at her shoulder, sobbing softly. Felicity didn’t know how much time passed that she spent just holding William and comforting him. She couldn’t imagine what it had to feel for a child to think it was his fault his father had ended up in a hospital.

“Your mother’s here,” Felicity finally said when Samantha came hurrying towards them.

Immediately William let go of Felicity and ran towards his mom. He wrapped his arms around her middle and pressed himself close to her.

“Are you okay?” she asked him, hugging him close to her.

“Yes, it’s dad,” William answered.

“He is going to be okay,” Felicity hurried to say.

Samantha’s eyes snapped towards her, taking her in. Felicity lowered her gaze to her feet, unsure of what to do. Samantha really was the last person she wanted to talk to or even see right now.

“William, would you give Felicity and me a minute please?” Samantha asked.

William looked from his mother to Felicity, probably feeling the tension that was suddenly there. He nodded, though.

“I… will see what Emmy and Tommy are doing,” he said. He let his arms fall away from around his mother’s waist and turned around to head towards the elevators. He had already taken two steps when he turned back around. “It was nice meeting you, Felicity.”

“It was nice meeting you, too,” Felicity replied. “Bye, William.”

“Bye.”

Felicity watched him leave, thinking that there was a lot of Oliver in that boy. It wasn’t just about his looks but a lot about something she couldn’t even name that made her see a miniature version of her husband when she looked at William.

“Hi,” Samantha said with a clearing of her throat. “I… uhm… can we talk?”

“If you think that I have been here all weekend and-“

“No,” Samantha hurried to say, sitting down next to Felicity. “I don’t believe that.”

Felicity nodded, staring right in front of her. She was angry, angry because of all the time she had missed and because of her not being there when something like this happened. She wasn’t sure if talking with Samantha now would be a good idea because if the anger she felt would boil up, she doubted this was going to be a good, sensitive talk. And her mother had been right. They needed to sit down and discuss what they would do now. She had seen with Oliver where reproaches were taking them.

“You took care of William,” Samantha said quietly. “You sat here and comforted him instead of going to see your own kids. And that after I kept you apart for so long.”

“Well, that wasn’t William’s fault,” Felicity replied bitterly.

When Samantha didn’t reply, Felicity flashed her a glance. She looked uncomfortable.

“I… uhm… Oliver told me that you were the one who kept him from suing for joint custody and-“

“I did,” Felicity interrupted her. “But that doesn’t mean that it can go on like this forever. You have to admit that it is extremely unfair to my family and-“

“You’re right,” it was now Samantha interrupting Felicity. “You’re right. It’s not fair and… and I don’t even know what drove me to do this… I am… I am usually a really nice person. I… I think I was just scared.”

“Of what?” Felicity asked, only now really looking at Samantha. “I understand being scared in your situation, but you’ve met Oliver. You’ve seen him being a dad. What have you been scared of? That I am the evil stepmother and I am going to traumatize your child? Or that I am going to urge Oliver to take William from you?”

Samantha looked down guiltily. “I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.”

Felicity sighed, nodding. Most of her anger was gone by now. She just felt exhausted and tired. “And now?”

Samantha took in a deep breath before she stated, “Now I suggest when William comes here the next time or Oliver comes to see him in Central City, you will be there with him. I saw you taking care of William and… I feel like… you would be a gain for my son’s life, so… you can see him. I am no longer in the way.”

Felicity nodded slowly. She felt like there should be a weight falling off of her shoulders, but it didn’t happen. She felt just as burdened as she had been before Samantha had finally given her consent of letting her meet William.

She didn’t know what it was. Maybe the realization that finally her family could be united like she had hoped it would be just needed to settle before it-

“Mrs. Queen?” a nurse asked, approaching her. “Your husband woke up. You can go see him right now.”

Felicity nodded, getting up. She took the first steps before she turned back to Samantha and said, “I am sure William would like to see Oliver.”

Samantha nodded. “I’ll tell him to give you a few minutes before going to see you.”

“Okay,” Felicity replied.

“Felicity?” Samantha held her back before Felicity could turn around. “I’m really sorry.”

Felicity nodded, but she didn’t say anything more. There wasn’t much left to say right now.

She slowly followed the nurse to Oliver’s room and took in a deep breath before she knocked. Felicity didn’t wait for Oliver to tell her to come in, though. She just opened the door, stepping into the hospital room. Oliver was lying in the bed with his head resting in a pillow. His eyes were turned towards her, a soft smile playing on his lips. His left leg was in a thick cast, but he looked fit otherwise. She had definitely seen him in worse states.

“Hi, beautiful,” Oliver said, reaching out his hand for her to come and grab it. “How did your trip to Gotham go?”

Felicity looked at Oliver’s hand for a long moment, considering taking it. She decided against it, though, strolling to the end of the bed and grabbing the footboard instead. Felicity took in a deep breath, feeling tears springing to her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Oliver asked worriedly, his eyes widening at the sight. “I’m fine. It’s just a broken leg, a few cuts and bruises from the windshield, but I am fine and-“

“I wasn’t in Gotham,” Felicity interrupted him.

Oliver frowned, sitting up more straightly without taking his eyes off her. “What?”

“The meeting has been delayed. I went to see my mom instead,” Felicity explained. “And if there is something that I realized while I was there than it’s that… trying to pretend like everything is okay is not going to take us to a healthy place.”

“What… what do you mean?” Oliver asked, worry audible in his voice.

“I hated the situation with you being away so often,” Felicity told him. “I tried not to hate it, but I did. I did my best to hide it because I wanted you to get to know William, and I wanted William to have his father, but I hated it. And the fact that you didn’t even consider taking me with you to Central City hurt me. This is not about taking me to see him. I know you wanted to respect Samantha’s wishes, but you didn’t even consider making like a weekend home in Central City where I could stay and maybe visit Team Flash while you are seeing William. That really hurt me.”

“I… didn’t even think about that,” Oliver whispered, his eyes focused on her intensely. “That idea never crossed my mind. I’m… sorry.”

“And you know I am very supportive of you getting to know your son, but… all of this was so much and-“

“You always said you were fine,” Oliver interrupted her with low voice. “You even encouraged me to keep things as they were.”

“Yes, because I talked myself into doing so. I tried to ignore all the doubts and fears and do that. I know I should have told you as soon as I realized, but there have been times that you have known,” Felicity explained. “There have been times that you looked right through what I said and into what I felt. Sometimes you knew me better than I know myself.”

Oliver lowered his gaze. “I’m sorry.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, breathing out with a sigh. The weight that had refused to lift from her chest at Samantha’s words seemed to have fallen off now. For the first time in a long time she could really breathe.

“I am so sorry that I put you through so much,” Oliver said, looking at her. “I… I don’t know how it’s possible that I missed all of that and… I am so sorry.”

Felicity nodded. “I know you are.”

Oliver pursed his lips, looking at Felicity for a long moment. “I will… tell Samantha that I am not going to see William again as long as she doesn’t let you meet him.”

“She already agreed to letting me meet him,” Felicity explained.

“That’s good,” Oliver replied almost awkwardly. He looked at her for a long moment before he asked with low voice, “And now?”

“Now I am going to lie down and sleep,” Felicity told him. “I’m so exhausted.”

She slipped out of her shoes with a sigh and walked around the bed. She sat down on the edge of the mattress, grabbed Oliver’s left hand and lay down next to him with her head resting on his shoulder and her back pressing against his side. She could feel Oliver’s lips pressing to the back of her head.

“Is this okay?” she asked, aware of his bruises.

“It’s perfect,” Oliver whispered back. For a long time nobody said a word. Felicity stroked hr hand up and down Oliver’s forearm, keeping her eyes open despite the tiredness. She just needed to enjoy this moment first. He rested his cheek against her head, asking, “Do you think we will be okay?”

“Of course we will be,” Felicity replied. “We’re Oliver and Felicity. We always survive.”

She linked her fingers with Oliver, but frowned when she turned their hands, so she could press a kiss to the knuckles of his hand.

“Where is your ring?” she asked.

“Oh, I guess they put it away for surgery. Wait, I-” She could feel him move behind her and a drawer being opened before he added, “Got it.”

Felicity took the ring from him and slid it onto his left hand where it belonged. She linked their fingers and kissed the back of his hand like she had meant to do before.

“So you’re keeping me despite everything?” Oliver asked, a slightly teasing tone in his voice.

“Sure, I do,” Felicity replied with a tired sigh. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Oliver whispered back and kissed the back of her head once more. “And now sleep. You need to rest. I will do the same.”

“You should stay awake. William will come here soon,” Felicity replied tiredly. “He blames himself for what happened.”

“It wasn’t his fault.”

“I know. Blaming himself is in his DNA. You should talk to him about that.”

Oliver chuckled, saying something more, but Felicity couldn’t hear it anymore. She already drifted off into sleep.


	140. Making up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys! I wanted to say some words before the fic. 
> 
> The response I received to vocalizing my frustration with the reaction to the latest angst storyline was amazing! You guys really know how to build up someone who feels like like she has been torn down.  
> Thank you to everyone who took the time to message me in what way ever to encourage me to keep writing and especially to keep writing what I want to write. If it wasn’t for you, I would have probably taken some time away from this fic.
> 
> And now enjoy the next chapter!
> 
> xoxo Kathi

“Tommy, say ‘William’,” Felicity prompted.

Tommy looked at her with the same blue eyes as Oliver’s before he turned his gaze away to the small tent where Emmy was kneeling and still playing.

“Hm-mee!”

“Yes, that’s Emmy,” Felicity replied, clapping her hands and smiling at Tommy. “And who’s that?”

Felicity pointed at William, who was standing right in front of her and Tommy, watching the two of them. Tommy looked at his half-brother for a long moment. He turned his small body towards his mother’s and snuggled his face against her shoulder, hiding his face, instead of answering, though.

Shaking her head with a chuckle, Felicity looked at William and explained, “When I got him dressed this morning, he just said it out of the blue without anyone asking. It was cute.”

William nodded, smiling at them insecurely.

It was the first time William, Felicity, Oliver and the kids had come together to just spend time as a family since that unfortunate meeting in the hospital. Well, it was the first time they all really spend together as a family at all.

It was the first thing they had planned on when Oliver had been released from the hospital three days ago. He had stated that now that finally the way for Felicity to meet William and really get to know him was cleared, they should catch up on all the time that had been missed as soon as possible. So they had called Samantha and asked her to send William to Starling.

Felicity had picked him up from the airport earlier today because Oliver couldn’t drive and was barely any help at all with his leg still in the cast. What he had been able to help with, though, was making some sandwiches for the garden picnic they were doing now. While she and William had set up the tent for the kids to play and Tommy had napped, Oliver and Emmy had prepared food and drinks for a perfect afternoon.

And it was indeed close to perfect. Emmy and William had played the last half an hour while Felicity and Oliver had made themselves comfortable on the blanket, just watching the kids bounding in enjoyable silence. Felicity had been amazed by seeing Emmy and Tommy having this connection with their brother. Until today she had only heard about the three of them sharing a bond, but actually seeing it was just so much better.

It would be perfect if Tommy hadn’t fallen and started crying. Now he was all clingy to Felicity and wanted her to walk around with him, neglecting William’s multiple offers to walk with him instead. He had built a relationship with William during the several meetings in Central City. Felicity had seen that in the way the two boys had interacted before Tommy had fallen. The little boy preferred spending his time with his mommy when she was around, though. Tommy had always been a little mama’s boy.

“You know, hon, you can also walk on yourself,” Felicity told Tommy when he took two of her fingers and tried to drag her into the direction he wanted to go into. “You don’t need mommy’s help.”

Tommy could walk without help though uneven grounds like grass were still difficult for him, and he still tripped relatively often. At some days he didn’t mind and got up on his feet again no matter how often he fell, while on other days he started crying and refused to continue walking on his own anymore.

Not following her son’s request to get up from the floor and walk around with him, Felicity looked at William and asked, “Did you find everything you need upstairs?”

William was sleeping in one of the guest rooms, but Felicity had already made a mental note to get him his own room. If he was coming more often now, which she hoped for, he should have his own room here instead of sleeping in a guest room. He should find a second home here in Starling and an own room was the least he would need for that.

“I showed him everything, mama,” Emmy said with a bright smile.

William smiled still insecurely. “Yes. Thank you, Mrs…. Felicity.“

Felicity smiled. She couldn’t count how many times William had called her Mrs. Queen since he had arrived here and no matter how often she had asked him to just call her Felicity, the formal address had slipped his lips again and again. It had to be difficult for him to be here and try to find a place in an already very close family. He had found his place with Oliver, Emmy and Tommy, but Felicity knew that the dynamic had changed when she had been added to the scene.

“Do you-“

“Lillam!” Tommy suddenly called out, interrupting Felicity.

“Yes,” Felicity said excitedly, clapping her hands to applaud her little son. “Yes, William’s here.”

Felicity looked at William, seeing him smiling brightly. Given how little Tommy talked yet, it was a huge statement that he said William’s name. Other than mama, dada, Hm-mee and now Lillam there weren’t any real words to be found in his babbling yet. Tommy just wasn’t talking much. When Emmy had been in that age, she had already had used a large spectrum of words. Well, kids were different.

Tommy let go of Felicity’s hand and reached out for William again, calling out, “Lillam!”

Felicity smiled. “I guess my presence is no longer necessary.”

When William put his fingers into Tommy’s small hands, the little boy already started walking to try dragging his brother with him. Felicity got up from the floor, intending to go back to where Oliver was still lying on the blanket, resting on his side and watching the scene. William only took two steps before he came to a stop and looked at Felicity.

“Felicity?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you for trusting me with him despite… what happened.”

Felicity smiled with sympathy in her eyes. She knew that William still blamed himself for what had happened when he had been here the last time. She and Oliver had told him again and again that it hadn’t been his fault that the ball had rolled to the street, Tommy had followed it and Oliver had been hit by a car when he had saved Tommy. He still didn’t believe it, and it would probably take some time until he finally would. Like Felicity had said to Oliver in the hospital, blaming himself was in William’s DNA.

“That really wasn’t your fault, William,” Felicity explained. “And even if it had been your fault, we all make mistakes. Emmy once fell from the changing table when I wanted to change her diaper. Things like that happen”

William smiled at Tommy, who was now getting slightly frustrated that nobody wanted to help him getting to where he wanted to go. So William quickly directed his attention to his little brother and followed him to the flowerbed. Felicity watched the two of them and winked at Emmy, who didn’t let herself be bothered to just continue playing in the tent.

When she turned around and headed towards Oliver, she perked up an eyebrow at the way he looked at her with a barely readable expression. She got down on the blanket next to him, pecking his lips shortly.

“What?” she asked when he continued to look at her like that.

“Nothing,” Oliver replied, his smile growing wider.

“Then why are you staring?” Felicity asked with a chuckle.

“I am just generally amazed by you.”

“Generally amazed by me?”

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered barely louder than a breath.

Felicity felt her heart stumbling at the way Oliver looked at her with an expression of love and adoration. She had butterflies in her stomach and felt a prickling all over her skin. She knew she was a lucky woman to have a husband who still looked at her like that after several years of marriage and who would probably continue to look at her like that for a lot more time.

Slowly Felicity leaned in and kissed Oliver gently. Their lips lingered against each others for a long moment before Felicity opened up to Oliver, and he stroked his tongue against hers. He lowered his chest down on the blanket, pulling her with him and deepening the kiss.

The last weeks had been hard on them. After they had both rested some in the hospital, they had had another serious conversation. They had poured out their hearts to one another, leaving no word unspoken, even if they had been scared of hurting the other. At the end it had only brought them closer like honesty had always done.

Sometimes it needed a setback to remind them of why they were working in the first place. And they did work, now better than ever.

When their lips broke apart, Felicity rested her head on Oliver’s shoulder with a sigh. Oliver combed her long hair with his fingers, pressing his lips to the crown of her head, while Felicity watched the children.

Emmy had joined her two brothers now, and all three of them seemed to be on a treasure hunt.

She liked this, spending just a lazy day with Oliver and the kids. It was so normal, and she felt like they hadn’t had any normality in quite awhile. She had gotten the presentation at Wayne Enterprise over with. The project had started, so her work would now slowly decrease and that meant more family time, so hence more normality.

“Are you happy?” Oliver asked.

Felicity smiled, turning her head to rest her chin on his chest and look at him. Her right hand moved to the spot right over his heart, and Oliver gripped her fingers, holding them to his chest.

“Very,” she replied, smiling at him. “And you?”

“Very,” he repeated her words, smiling back.

Felicity rested her head back on his shoulder, looking at the children. When from the rim of her field of vision, she saw the cast on Oliver’s leg, Felicity pursed her lips. The doctor had said that Oliver had to wear it for at least eight weeks. They were lucky if he got rid of that thing before Christmas.

“Do you know what sucks about the fact that we made up?” she asked, drawing random pattern on Oliver’s chest with the tip of her finger.

“Nothing?” Oliver asked back.

Felicity chuckled, turning her head back to look at Oliver once more.

“Nothing?” she asked, perking up an eyebrow.

“I didn’t know what could possibly be wrong about the fact that we made up.”

“Hm…” Felicity hummed, giving him a hint by opening the topmost button of Oliver’s dress shirt and move her hand under the fabric and over his naked chest. “And there is nothing that comes to your mind?”

Oliver narrowed his eyes slightly. “Just so we’re clear, we are talking about make-up sex, right?”

“What else would suck about the fact that we already made up while your leg is still in that cast?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

Oliver cleared his throat, sitting up. Felicity frowned, but she followed his lead and sat up, too. Oliver kept his eyes on their linked fingers on his knee for awhile before he looked at her with slightly cocked head.

“I was actually wondering this week if we were… ready for that.”

“Ready for what?”

Oliver shot a quick glance to the kids, making sure they were far enough away before he answered, “Well, to have make-up sex. I know a lot happened-“

“-but we got through it,” Felicity interrupted him. She squeezed his hand reassuringly. “Oliver, we can only move forward and I think that includes having make-up sex. Well, it would include having make-up sex if you weren’t… deficient.”

“Deficient?” Oliver repeated. “Hey, my leg might be in a cast, but I can still-“ another quick glance to the children – “make you scream my name and beg me to give you more.”

“You can?”

“My leg might not be usable, but the rest of my body is in best form.”

Felicity grinned smugly, matching his grin. “That sounds good.”

“Well, I can’t take you against the wall like I know you love, and I will probably have to give up a lot of the work to you-“

“Work, work, work, work,” Felicity said with a sigh.

“-but other than that we are free to do whatever we want.”

“I repeat; that sounds good.”

They grinned at each other for a long moment before Felicity straddled Oliver’s legs, sitting down in his lap and kissing him. It was weird how much of an elementary part make-up sex had become to their fights. It was the one thing they needed to really connect at the end and to tell the other that what had been had been, but no longer was.

“Okay, maybe we shouldn’t have make-up sex in front of the kids,” Oliver suggested, breaking the hotter growing kiss with a groan.

Felicity pressed her lips together, clearing her throat.

“Right,” she whispered. She pecked his lips shortly before sliding off his lap and back onto the blanket next to him.

Oliver’s hand stayed on her knee, stroking the soft skin. The tips of his fingers even moved further up until the middle of her thigh before they moved down again. It was the most he allowed himself with the kids watching.

“Besides,” he added after awhile, “I would like to use our make-up sex for the fulfillment of another wish.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “You’re sure? Make-up sex is already really good.”

Oliver smiled, slowly moving his hand back up her thigh. He watched the movement of his fingers when he answered, “I didn’t know that I would ask for this wish to be fulfilled until a few days ago. It’s newly added to the list of wishes, and I think I want to try it as soon as possible.”

“You are making me nosy,” Felicity stated, watching Oliver’s eyes closely. “So what is it?”

“You will receive an envelope in the next days,” Oliver replied. “You will have to wait until then.”

“Fine,” Felicity grumbled.

She pecked Oliver’s lips shortly before they both lay back down. Felicity’s head came to rest on Oliver’s shoulder once more. Together they watched their children playing, enjoying the comfortable silence between them for a long while.

Felicity tapped her fingertips on Oliver’s chest before she got up with a groan.

“Where are you going?” Oliver asked, sitting up.

“I’ll get the kids some sweets,” she explained. “Now that there is the promise of make-up sex in the air, I can’t stay here with you right now.”

“You are so horny,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“Oh, shut up,” Felicity called back over her shoulder with a smile and winked at him before she disappeared into the house, distracting herself from what she knew would come soon –

Hot, passionate make-up sex.


	141. Blindfolded

“Okay, I am going to ask you this one last time,” Felicity said, approaching Oliver where he was sitting on the edge of the bed until she was standing between his legs with her hands resting on his shoulders. She looked at him intensely. “Are you really sure you want to do this?”

Smiling, Oliver put his hands to her hips and pulled her even closer, so he could press a kiss to her stomach through the fabric of her bathrobe. Felicity hummed contently. The thin silk allowed her to feel Oliver’s kiss almost as great as if his lips were pressing against her skin without any barrier between.

“I trust you,” he stated, looking up at her with an expression of unconditional love that made Felicity’s heart stumble no matter how often she had seen him looking at her like that, “and I am as sure as one can be that I want to do this. With you.”

“Oliver, if you feel like you need to do this to prove your trust to me, I can guarantee you that-“

Oliver interrupted her by pulling her against him and straightening up as much as he could, so he could kiss her gently. He stroked his tongue into her mouth, making her forget whatever she had been about to say. Felicity’s arms wrapped around his neck on their own will, and she leaned her body against his, feeling the need to just melt to one with him.

When their lips parted, he waited until Felicity looked at him, so he knew he had all her attention before he explained, “I do trust you, Felicity, and maybe this is my way of proving it to you, but I wouldn’t ask you to do this if I wasn’t ready to try this. We can still stop if it gets too much, right?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. When she had read on the card in the envelope that Oliver wanted her to blindfold him, she had immediately known that it had been a result of their fight. Leaving a lot of control to her in bed was his way of showing his trust in her. Given what he had been through in his five years away, Felicity just wasn’t sure that this was a good idea.

“If you don’t want to do this, though…”

“No, no,” Felicity replied quickly, smiling. “I am just not sure if this isn’t too much for you, you know? Giving up control by not seeing what I am doing… it’s… I don’t want bad memories to elicit from that.”

“Bad memories from you and me in bed?” Oliver asked, pushing the fabric of her bathrobe away a little, so he could press a kiss to the upper part of her breast. “Naked? I don’t remember there being any bad memories of that.”

Felicity cocked her head, looking at him with a frown. The fact that Oliver wasn’t taking this serious was only a sign that he hadn’t thought this through, right?

“Okay, listen,” Oliver said. He took her hands from his shoulders and linked his fingers with hers. “I love you, and I trust you to stop when I ask you to. Besides, it’s not like I am tied to the bed. I can still take over control when it’s getting too much.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, nodding to herself. Smiling, Oliver straightened up once more and pressed a kiss to the underside of her jaw.

“Thank you,” he whispered before he leaned over to the nightstand and grabbed the blindfold, holding it out for Felicity. “Do you want to put it on for me?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. She took the blindfold from his hands and put it over his eyes. Leaning over his shoulder, she looked at the back of his head where the two ends of the fabric met and knotted them. “Is this okay, or is it too tight?”

“Perfect,” Oliver replied, smiling. “I can already see… or rather sense that I am going to enjoy this.”

“But you tell me when you don’t, right?”

“Yes. I promise.”

“Okay then,” Felicity said, nodding to herself.

She bit down on her bottom lip, wondering how to start. They had agreed that with Oliver’s leg in the cast the bed would be the best place to play out this fantasy. And to not foul the atmosphere up when they were in the moment, they had already gotten rid of most of their clothes which left Oliver in boxer brief and Felicity in her bathrobe with some sexy lingerie underneath.

“You didn’t leave me alone, did you?” Oliver asked after awhile when Felicity stayed silent.

Chuckling, Felicity put her hands to Oliver’s shoulders and brushed her lips against his for a short moment.

“I am just trying to figure out how to start,” Felicity explained.

Oliver put his hands to Felicity’s hips and smiled up at her blindly. “I think the kiss was a good start.”

“Yes?” Felicity asked back with a smile he couldn’t see but certainly hear.

Oliver hummed in approval. He tried to straighten up and kiss her once more, but Felicity leaned back, so their lips were a breath away from each other, but they wouldn’t touch. She put her hands to his shoulders and pushed him away gently. She lowered her lips to the shell of his ear, brushing them against it.

“Lie down on the bed,” she whispered quietly.

Oliver followed her request without any hesitation. Felicity helped him lifting his left leg that with the cast was quite heavy. She watched him crawling in the middle of the bed and relaxing there. Only then did she open the belt of her bathrobe, let the fabric pool on the floor and crawled onto the bed to Oliver. She straddled his hips, catching Oliver’s hands in the air when he lifted them to touch her.

“Your hands will stay here until I will give you the permission to move them, okay?” Felicity asked, putting his hands to her knees.

Oliver nodded, licking his lips, and with a quiet moan Felicity leaned down. She used the opportunity of his mouth being opened to just stroke her tongue into his mouth. Her hands roamed from his abs up his chest to his shoulders before taking the same path down, scratching her nails of Oliver’s chest slightly. Oliver groaned into the kiss, thrusting his hips up against hers. Felicity broke the kiss, gasping for air, as Oliver’s thrust had sent a jolt of pleasure right through her core.

Felicity sat up, slightly rubbing herself against Oliver. She could feel him harden in his boxer briefs, and they both moaned at the feeling. Biting down on her bottom lip, Felicity took Oliver’s hands and moved them from her knees up her thighs and over her stomach to her breasts. Oliver hummed.

“I love lace on you,” he whispered.

Felicity smiled, still moving on top of him. She knew exactly how much he loved lace. When she had put it on, he had complained that she was going to wear his favorite set of lingerie and he wouldn’t even get to see it.

Felicity leaned down, kissing Oliver. Their tongues moved in unison without any battle for dominance. Felicity moved her legs, straightening them, so she was lying on top of Oliver and could press her chest to his. When she broke the kiss, she moved her lips to his ear.

“Open my bra.”

Oliver complied without hesitation. He moved his hands to the clasp of her bra, letting the tips of his fingers slide over her delicate skin on their way. Felicity could feel goose bumps elicit on her skin where Oliver had touched her. He opened the clasp of her bra and Felicity took it off. She didn’t give him the chance of exploring the feeling of her hardened nipples against his fingertips, though.

Instead she leaned forward and pressed her chest against his again. Her lips moved down from the corner of his mouth to his jaw. She smiled at the familiar feeling of his short stubble against her sensitive lips, but she didn’t let that stop her from continuing her path down Oliver’s body. She followed the line of his strong neck, sucking at his pulse point.

“Felicity,” Oliver moaned, thrusting up firmly once more.

Biting down on her bottom lip to keep herself from moaning, she slid further down his body, now sitting on his thighs instead of in his lap. She could feel the edge of his cast cutting into her butt.

“Is this okay?” she asked.

“Perfect,” Oliver replied with hoarse voice.

Smiling, Felicity lowered her lips. She nibbled at his collarbone for a moment before she started newly exploring all of his scars. Her lips and tongue teased the scarred skin, worshipping each of the marks his brutal past had left on him. Felicity loved the feeling of his scars against her sensitive skin, and she knew how much they had turned into an erogenous zone for Oliver once he had truly accepted them to be a part of him.

Felicity worked herself further down Oliver’s chest from scar to scar. Meanwhile his hands moved from her back down to her butt, squeezing. He tried to pull her back against him, so she was again sitting in his lap, but Felicity refused to let herself be moved by Oliver. They had just started, and she wasn’t going to give him his will already.

Instead Felicity moved further down on the mattress. She was lying between his legs with her fingertips playing with the waistband of his boxer briefs. Oliver groaned, wiggling with his hips beneath her. Felicity kept her touch lightly, though, moving the tips of her fingers back and forth right above the hem of the last clothing that was still covering him.

“Felicity,” Oliver groaned impatiently.

He tried to thrust up to get more contact, but Felicity’s weight on his right leg and the cast on his left kept him down. He groaned in frustration once more, and Felicity chuckled in response.

“Oh, you’re really enjoying this, aren’t you?” he asked. “Taking over the control like this...”

Again Felicity chuckled, licking a path from the waistband of his boxers to his belly button. She dipped her tongue into it, and rested her chin on his lower stomach, looking up at him.

“Well, it’s nice,” Felicity replied, leaning her head forward to kiss his lower stomach. “Did you think it was going to be like this?”

“It’s exciting,” Oliver replied with a smile, “never to know what you’re doing. And I can just feel everything so much more intensely.”

“So you’re ready to continue?” Felicity asked.

“I wouldn’t have needed a pause to start with.”

“You’re being grumpy,” Felicity replied with a chuckle.

“Hey, you try being patient when-“ Oliver started, but it ended in a long moan when Felicity pressed her flat hand to his erection.

“You were saying?” Felicity asked.

Oliver didn’t answer. He just moved his hips, thrusting up to increase the friction of her hand against his hard cock. Felicity let him move the way he wanted, moving her hand up and down the outline of his cock over the boxers. Oliver moaned, biting down on his bottom lip as his pleasure increased.

Felicity watched his face closely. His front teeth were buried in his oh-so-soft looking bottom lip. They only released it when his tongue darted out to wet his lips, and it made a needy whine escape Felicity. She had a thing for Oliver licking his lips, so she kept her eyes on him, cocking her head slightly.

She felt the need for him growing inside of her, and she knew that she was wet already. She had planned on getting rid of Oliver’s boxers, positioning herself on top of him, so his cock would be pressed to his stomach, and let her wet folds slide back and forth on him. She knew that it would increase her pleasure and most likely bring her to orgasm when the head of his cock would bump against her clit. At the same time it would probably drive Oliver insane to feel her using him for her own pleasure and not even getting the chance of seeing her fall apart on top of him.

Watching him licking his lips and biting down on his bottom lip the way he did made Felicity question her plans, though. Usually while sex she always concentrated on his eyes because it created intimacy, and it was just so easy to lose herself in the depth of his blue eyes. With his eyes being covered, though, all her focus seemed to be on his lips, lips that she knew felt perfect against hers or against other, even more sensitive parts of her body.

“Felicity?”

At Oliver’s questioning voice Felicity was pulled from her thoughts. She looked down at her hand, figuring that it was no longer covering his clothed erection. It must have moved away on own accord.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip shortly before she stated, “I want to try something.”

“Whatever you want,” Oliver replied with hoarse voice.

Felicity took Oliver’s boxers off, freeing his erection, and Oliver released a quiet sigh in response. Quickly Felicity got rid of her own panties, too, feeling her nervousness increase slightly. She had never done this before, and she was slightly nervous about it though she knew that there was no reason to. She and Oliver and never had problems to try things in the bedroom. And even if that had taken them to awkward places from time to time, the awkwardness had never lasted long. They had been intimate for too long for any awkwardness to last long.

Letting her panties fall to the floor, Felicity crawled up the bed until she was kneeling next to his shoulder. She took in a deep breath and moved her right knee over his neck, placing it on the other side of his body. She moved her fingertip over his bottom lip.

“I feel like I will enjoy your idea very much,” Oliver said with a smile, licking his lips once more while his hands were now gripping her hips.

Felicity still hesitated, but eventually she moved a little higher, so he was hovering right over Oliver’s face. She watched him taking in a deep breath, breathing in the scent of her wetness. Felicity watched him for a long moment, and only when his tongue darted out to wet his lips once more, she lowered herself onto his face.

Her hands came to grip the headboard of their bed when the feeling of Oliver’s tongue licking a slow path from her entrance to her clit made her legs feel wobbly and threaten to give in. She pressed her lips together, releasing a long moan. He hummed against her wet folds, and the vibration made the sensation of his lips against her most sensitive parts so much more enjoyable.

Oliver lowered his tongue back to her center. He lifted his chin, so he could press his flat tongue against her entrance. His stubble scratched the curve of her butt deliciously while he was continuing to tease her entrance. The tip of his tongue dipped into her wet channel, swirling once around the tight walls before moving out.

Felicity groaned before saying in a pleading tone, “Oliver, please!”

Without any more teasing he thrust his tongue into her, caressing her inner walls. Felicity started moving on top of him, varying between just sliding back and forth and moving up and down. The sensation seemed to be a completely different one than when he was usually eating her out. The angle of his tongue was different and the fact that she could move on him and make his tongue slip even deeper into her just turned her on beyond belief.

As her pleasure increased, Felicity pushed her legs closer to Oliver’s head. It made her walls tighten around his tongue and made his stubble scratch over her skin even more firmly.

“Oliver,” she moaned out when she felt her release nearing.

As soon as the last syllable had left his lips, Felicity could feel him moving his tongue even deeper inside of her, pressing it against the riffled part that made her come with a high-pitched scream of his name. He let her ride out her orgasm against his face, encouraging her for massaging her thighs.

Felicity was panting, hardly being able to catch her breath. As soon as she felt able to do so, she loosened her hands from the tight grip on the handrail and moved it through his short hair. Quickly she crawled down his body, still straddling it. She lowered herself onto his lower stomach, pressing her upper body flat against his chest and kissed him desperately.

Oliver responded to the kiss immediately. His lips opened up to her with a moan while his arms wrapped around her back and crushed her to him tightly. She could taste herself on his lips and tongue, and it only turned her on more.

“You did really well,” Felicity whispered against his lips.

Her right hand moved down from his shoulder over his chest and stomach to his erection, gently stroking it. Oliver’s head fell back onto the pillow as a long moan escaped his lips. His hips thrust into her hand.

“I didn’t make you scream in awhile.”

“That’s because we don’t always get to send the kids away for sex,” Felicity replied.

Most of the times they were limited to quickies when the kids were busy or asleep. They made the best out of it, enjoying every single second they got to spend with each other. Yet taking their time was great whenever they had the time to do so.

“Are we going to continue?” Oliver asked with hoarse voice when Felicity squeezed his length in her hand.

“Sure, we will,” Felicity replied.

She kissed him once more, gently biting into his bottom lip, before she pulled away. She sat back up, sliding a little lower on his body until his cock made contact with her wet folds. She was still sensitive from her first orgasm, so the contact made both of them moan.

“Felicity,” Oliver hissed, putting his hands to her hips.

If her first orgasm hadn’t made her so eager for more, she might have teased him a little more. She would have slid her folds back and forth along his length like she had planned on in the first place. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hold onto teasing him for too long, though. So she decided to just skip that. Getting up on her knees, she hovered over Oliver’s lap. She positioned his cock at her entrance and slowly sank down.

They both moaned in unison, enjoy the feeling of being joint again.

The reason why make-up sex, sex in general, was so important to them was because it was one of the many ways they communicated. Sure, sometimes they just had sex for the fun, but even then it always included a way of communicating with each other. What words failed to let the other know, sex could. What words could say, sex could show. For them it was as simple and yet meaningful as that.

Slowly they picked up a rhythm. Felicity rather slid back and forth on top of Oliver than lifting herself away from him. Oliver meanwhile kept his hand on her hips, helping to guide her movements, while he was thrusting up every now and then.

All that could be heard was the sound of skin hitting against skin and their shorter growing breaths. The scent of sweat was in the air. Felicity barely noticed any of that, though. All her attention was focused on the feeling of Oliver inside of her, the feeling of his rough hands on her hips and the sensation of his scarred skin beneath her fingertips.

The closer they both got to their relief, the more the pace of their movements increased. Her walls tightened around Oliver’s cock, gripping him tighter.

“Oliver,” Felicity moaned out.

“Yeah,” he answered the question she hadn’t needed to vocalize.

They were both close, growing closer each time his cock sank into her wet heat. When Felicity felt herself being right on the edge, she lowered her chest back onto Oliver’s. Her mouth hovered right over his lips, breathing the same air as Oliver did. He tried to chase her lips for a kiss, but Felicity was just far enough away for him to kiss her.

When Felicity finally came for the second time that night, it was Oliver’s name falling from her lips. Oliver followed her over the edge only two thrusts later, her name falling from his lips in return.

As they both slowly came down from their high, their lips met in a bruising kiss that only slowly decreased its urgency. Not breaking the kiss, Felicity pulled the blindfold from Oliver’s eyes and tossed it somewhere behind her.

When their lips parted, they looked into each other’s eyes for a long moment. Neither of them said a word. They just smiled at each other, talking without any word being needed.

“Hi,” Felicity whispered.

“Hi,” Oliver whispered back.

“This was amazing.”

Oliver grinned. “Sometimes I have good ideas, don’t I?”

“When it comes to sex?” Felicity asked. “Most of the times, yes.”

“You were quite creative yourself.” When Felicity blushed at that, Oliver chuckled. The tips of his fingers followed the way the red blush took on her skin. “I love how after everything you can still blush.”

Felicity propped her head up onto her hand, looking at Oliver. She moved her fingertips through his short stubble. Smiling, she watched Oliver closing his eyes and leaning into the touch.

“How long until Thea and Roy bring the kids back?” he asked without opening his eyes.

Felicity glanced at the clock on her nightstand, sighing.

“I told her not to bring them back before seven,” she answered. “That will leave us with five more ours. And if we’re lucky, they will keep them over night which would leave us with a lot of hours.”

“Do we think that will happen?”

“Tommy had a good day,” Felicity replied. She rested her head on his chest, drawing lazy patterns on his chest with the tip of her finger. “Maybe we’re lucky.”

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a sigh. He stroked his hands up and down her back gently. “Either way we have time for a nap before going for a second round.”

“I love napping.”

Felicity snuggled her cheek against Oliver’s chest until she was really comfortable. Sighing, she closed her eyes. Oliver moved one hand to her hair, the other arm wrapping around her tightly. He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, holding her safely to him.

“I love you,” he whispered against her hair. “And I am so grateful you were able to forgive me and to let me show you that I do trust her despite what it seemed like.”

Felicity was already half-asleep, but she turned her head to press her lips against Oliver’s chest and kissed his scarred skin there.

“I love you,” she whispered with a quiet sigh. “And I am not ever giving up on us easily.”

“I am very happy to hear that,” Oliver replied. “I’m not giving up on us either.”

It were the last words Felicity heard before she fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So far on the sex list we had:  
> 1) Bratva roleplay  
> 2) special location outside  
> 3) blindfold kink
> 
> We have two more wishes. I would like to have maybe like a special position for wish #4 and something really special for wish #5 since that will be fulfilled during their next anniversary. Maybe #5 could be something - in what way ever - really emotional or like a callback to old times. 
> 
> I always take suggestions for the list, and as soon as I have a small number of ideas for wish #4, I will set up a new survey for you to decide what I should write. Thanks fo your help!


	142. Making mommy proud

“Daddy, you gotta show me!”

“No, not today, Emmy. And not here.”

“Daddy, please!”

“Emmy-“

“Please, please, please, please, pleeeeeeease!”

Oliver groaned slightly at the look on his daughter’s face. She had pushed her bottom lip forward, looking at him with big, blue eyes. Emmy knew exactly that he couldn’t resist that face at all which was why she let that face work its magic on him whenever she really wanted something.

“Emmy,” he said with a sigh, looking at the corner of the gym where adults, teenagers and even little children were allowed to try their luck in archery.

It was a rainy day, so Felicity and Oliver had decided to take Emmy and Tommy to the opening of this new gym and see if they could do some fun stuff. While Felicity and Tommy had been distracted by the mommy yoga right next to the entrance, Emmy had discovered the edge of archery. Now she was trying to persuade him into showing her how to shoot an arrow.

“Daddy, please,” she repeated, wrapping her arms around his hips and looking up at him with the same pleading expression from before.

“Look, Emmy, my leg is still in the cast and-“

“But you’re the-“

Oliver quickly put his hand onto her lips and lifted his finger to his own to signal her to be quiet. Emmy had never been so close to spilling the secret of his alter-ego as she had been today. For a little girl of the young age of only three and a half years she had been doing great about keeping this secret, but sometimes when she got all excited, it threatened to escape her. Oliver waited until Emmy nodded, wordlessly promising that she wouldn’t say it, before he lifted his hand from her lips.

“Sorry, daddy,” she said.

“It’s not that bad,” he promised, winking at her.

Emmy smiled. “Will you show me how to shoot an arrow now?”

Oliver chuckled. He knew she wouldn’t let go of the idea until he had given in.

“Fine,” Oliver said with a sigh, admitting defeat.

“Thank you, daddy!” Emmy said, tightening her arms around his hips for a short moment before she ran off to the edge of archery.

Oliver followed her. With the cast and the crutches he had to use because of that he was quite slow and had to be even more focused on where his daughter ran to not lose her in the crowd. When he arrived, Emmy was already picking up one of the plastic bows and an arrow with the rubber end, holding it out for him. Oliver watched it with a slight discouraged face. The rubber ends were good, but plastic, really? But then again Emmy was only three, so a real bow would probably be a little much for her.

Oliver took the bow and arrow from her, staring at it for another very long moment. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted to see Emmy shooting an arrow never mind teaching her how to do it.

When he had started being the Arrow, it had kept him in the darkness for a long time. It had kept him from enjoying life and giving into what he had really wanted like being with Felicity and… well, that was the one big thing actually. Besides, it was dangerous, and it was bad enough that his little sister had gotten herself into this. He never ever wanted to see his baby girl joining the team or using a weapon. She was supposed to live in peace and-

“Daddy?” Emmy asked him, looking up at him with a worried expression in her eyes.

Oliver bent down to put the crutches to the floor before he bent the knee that wasn’t in the cast and slowly got down on it, so he was on one level with his daughter. She bit down on her bottom lip like Felicity always did and looked at him expectantly. Smiling, Oliver put an arm around her waist and pulled her against him, kissing her neck which made her giggle like it always did.

“Do you know how much I love you?” he asked with a sigh.

“To the moon and back at least,” Emmy answered, putting her arms around his neck tightly.

“To the moon and back at least,” Oliver repeated in confirmation. He pulled back enough, so he could look at her. “So if daddy asked you not to do this, would you comply?”

Emmy’s face fell, making her look disappointed and sad. Her gaze was lowered to where her hands were busy playing with the plastic bow when she said, “But I want to make mommy super-proud.”

Oliver frowned, rubbing Emmy’s back. “What do you mean, sweetie? Mommy’s always proud of you.”

“But mommy said whenever you hit a… a…”

“Target?” Oliver helped out with a vocabulary.

Emmy nodded. “-a target, she is super-proud. Not just proud, daddy. Super-proud!”

“Mommy said that?” Oliver asked, and Emmy nodded.

Oliver knew how proud Felicity was of him and what he and the team which of course included her had achieved in Starling. Whenever he came home from a mission that she watched over – or maybe overwatched, Oliver thought with an amused smile – from home, she would welcome him back home with a kiss and tell him how proud she was that he had made Starling a little bit better again. He could understand why Emmy wanted that too.

“Fine, come here, sweetie,” Oliver admitted defeat with a sigh. He made sure that Emmy was standing next him when he lifted the arrow and bow to tell her how to hit her target. “Look, the arrow needs to be positioned like this, and then you pull it back. See?”

Emmy nodded, watching him carefully. She was so concentrated on what her daddy showed her that there was a little frown between her eyebrows. It made Oliver smile.

“And then, daddy?” Emmy turned his attention back onto the task at hand.

“You put your right hand to your face like this,” he explained. “You made sure to aim, and then you just let go.”

Oliver did as he said and let go of the arrow. It hit the bull’s eyes, making some people around applaud.

“Definitely not the first arrow you shot, right?” one of the trainers asked.

“Maybe the second,” Oliver replied.

When Oliver headed to get back the arrow from the target, he winked at Emmy. The little girl laughed in amusement. It was one of his favorite sounds in the entire world. As soon as he was back with the arrow, he kneeled down next to Emmy and was just about to prompt her to it now when-

“Really? I leave you two for three minutes and you end up _here_?”

“Oh-oh,” Oliver made, looking at Emmy with wide eyes. Quickly he whispered with playfully dramatic voice, “Hurry! You have to distract her before she starts speaking in her loud voice!”

Oliver didn’t miss the glance Felicity shot him, but one wink of him and a smile broke onto his face. It betrayed the punishing expression she tried to maintain.

“Mommy, come here!” Emmy said quickly, reaching out her hand for Felicity. “You need to come here. I want to show you how I shoot an arrow.”

“Oh, that sounds interesting,” Felicity said, putting Tommy from her hip down to the floor.

The little boy cried out, reaching out his hands for Felicity’s hair to hold onto her, but Felicity pushed his hands away gently. When Tommy threatened to release another cry that would most likely turn everybody’s attention on them and spoil the fun, Oliver quickly pulled Tommy close to him.

“Look, what is Emmy doing?”

“Hm-mee!” Tommy said, pointing at his sister.

“Yes, Emmy.”

“First hold the arrow like this,” Emmy said, quickly glancing at Oliver for confirmation, and he nodded. “Then pull it back.”

“Wow, you look really dangerous,” Felicity said. “Like… hm… what could your name be? Arrow-Girl maybe.”

“Yes!” Emmy said excitedly, not letting herself be distracted from her task at hand for long, though. “And now the right hand to the face and aim.”

The little frown between her eyebrows showed up once more, and it would make Oliver smile if he wasn’t so amazed by the way his daughter looked with the bow and arrow in her hands. He couldn’t say what exactly he felt at the sight. Maybe it was… pride? Despite everything? Oliver wasn’t sure.

“Mommy, it’s only my first try,” Emmy said, suddenly insecure about this.

“I know,” Felicity replied gently. “Don’t worry, sweetie.”

When Emmy let go, the arrow hit the target even if it was only the outmost ring.

“Wow!” Oliver made.

“That was great, sweetie!” Felicity added with a bright smile. “You hit it.”

“But it’s not the middle,” Emmy said sadly. “I want to try it again.”

“No, no,” Felicity stopped her, holding her wrist gently to keep her from running away to get the arrow back. “See, there are other kids who want to try it. We can come back here later.”

“But, mommy!” Emmy protested.

Felicity shook her head, taking the bow from her daughter’s hand and putting it to the small table at her side.

“But, mommy!”

“No,” Felicity said again, shaking her head.

Oliver got up on his feet, taking the crutches with him. Tommy meanwhile sat down on the foot that was placed in plaster and closed his arms around Oliver’s leg. He loved being carried by him like that.

“Emmy, come on now,” Felicity asked Emmy gently when they wanted to go to find something else to try.

Emmy was still standing at the table, touching the plastic bow. She had her gaze lowered when she murmured, “I wanted to make your proud.”

Oliver looked from Tommy to Emmy, who looked sad and disappointed in herself, and to Felicity. His beautiful wife seemed a little clueless about what to say, probably just as shocked by the sadness in their daughter’s voice as Oliver was.

“Emmy, what are you saying?” Felicity asked, crouching down next to Emmy and pulling her in front of her. “Mommy is proud of you. Very proud.”

“But-“

“There is no but,” Felicity interrupted Emmy, lifting her into her arms. “Mommy is so, so, so” – Oliver quickly mouthed “super” towards Felicity which seemed to make her get the point – “super-proud of you.”

“Yes?” Emmy asked with small voice, looking at her mother through tear-filled eyes.

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a bright smile.

“But I didn’t hit it.”

“Yes, you did.”

“But not the middle.”

“Sweetie, that was your first shot,” she told her, “and you hit the target. I don’t think daddy hit the target with his first arrow.”

“Nope, I didn’t,” Oliver confirmed. “I missed even with the second and third and forth…”

“Really, daddy?” Emmy asked with hopeful eyes, and Oliver nodded.

“See?” Felicity asked, slightly bobbing Emmy on her arms. “Even daddy failed his first target. You’re better than daddy.”

Emmy smiled. “And are you really proud, mommy?”

“I am not only proud,” Felicity told Emmy. “I am super-proud.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, absolutely,” Felicity assured Emmy and pressed a firm kiss to her daughter’s lips.

Smiling, Emmy lowered her head to her mother’s shoulder and closed her eyes with a sigh. Felicity rubbed a comforting hand over her daughter’s back and kissed her temple while she was carrying her away from the archery station. Oliver followed them with Tommy still on his foot, thinking that they probably made quite the picture.


	143. What makes a home

 

“William’s here!” Emmy shouted as soon as she saw the car turning into the driveway.

Before Oliver even got the chance to get up from where he was sitting at the table and feeding Tommy, Emmy had already slid off the kitchen counter and was running towards the door. From the moment Felicity had left to pick William up from the airport, she had been sitting on the kitchen counter and started out of the window, waiting for her mother to bring her half-brother here. She hadn’t even touched her food because she had been too excited for William’s arrival. They would probably order a pizza later when Tommy was in bed, anyway, so Oliver didn’t mind too much.

“Hm-mee?” Tommy asked, turning his head to look at where his sister had ran out of the kitchen.

“Emmy is welcoming William and mommy,” Oliver explained, lifting the next spoon to Tommy’s lips, but the little boy turned his head away and pointed at the door.

“Dada! Hm-mee!”

Oliver sighed. “You want to go and check what Emmy’s doing?”

“Hm-mee!” Tommy replied, still pointing his finger at where Emmy had left.

“Okay, come here, buddy,” Oliver said.

Carefully getting on the leg that was not in the cast, Oliver reached out his hands for Tommy and lifted him out of his highchair. As soon as the little boy’s feet had touched the floor and Oliver had let go of him, he was running off, once more calling out for his sister. Chuckling, Oliver lifted the crutches from the floor and followed his children.

Today was a big day for his family, and if he was really honest he had to admit that he was almost as excited as Emmy. Or maybe he was even more excited than she was. He wasn’t sure of that. He just knew that the difference between them was that he could control the nervous feeling a little better than the three-year-old could. Actually his heart was beating wildly and his chest felt slightly tightened, though.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to take the bag?” Oliver heard William ask.

“Yes,” Emmy’s answer followed between gritted teeth. “I got it.”

Only a few seconds later William stepped through the open door, followed by Felicity who was carrying Tommy. The boy had his head snuggled to his mother’s chest, playing with her ponytail. Oliver was kind of sure that Tommy hadn’t followed his sister to welcome William back here, but his mommy. He just didn’t like when mommy was away for too long, so when she came back home, he always made sure she would stay close to him and not leave him again.

“William,” Oliver said with a smile, putting the crutches away and spreading his arms for his son to step in and let himself be hugged. William hesitated for only the beat of a second before he did as his father’s gesture had asked for and stepped into his arms. Oliver wrapped his arms around William’s shoulders tightly. “Happy belated birthday, William.”

“Thanks, dad,” William said a little shyly before pulling back again.

Oliver watched him for a long moment. William had turned thirteen three days ago. Of course they had called him, and Emmy had even sung him a birthday song. They had decided against flying all the way to Central City for that day, though, because William was coming this weekend and his present was here anyway.

“Where is Emmy?” Oliver asked, looking towards the door.

He didn’t need an answer to that question, though, because before anyone could have answered, Emmy already stepped into the door frame. She was dragging William’s bag behind her, obviously having trouble to move it at all. A thin film of sweat had formed on her face.

“See?” she asked proudly as soon as she had dragged the bag over the door step. “I got it.”

“Yes, you absolutely do,” William said with a smile. “Do you want to go outside and play?”

“No, you gotta unpack your bag first!”

William frowned. “I can do that later when it’s dark and we can’t-“

“No, you gotta do it now!” Emmy said eagerly, taking his hand and starting to pull him towards the stairs. “Come on, William!”

“Hey, what about my bag?” William asked.

“You don’t need it.”

“I thought I should unpack?”

“William!” Emmy said with a dramatic sigh, rolling her eyes.

William shot a questioning glance to Oliver, who only smiled at him reassuringly. Slowly Felicity and Oliver followed the two upstairs. He was almost expecting that Emmy had dragged William right to the present they had prepared for him, but she was standing at the head of the stairs, waiting for them. She probably knew exactly how much that meant to her daddy.

“Can we show him now, daddy?” she asked with an excited smile.

“Sure,” Oliver replied, trying to hide his insecurity. If the way Felicity touched his shoulder and smiled at him encouragingly, it didn’t work too well. “Lead the way, sweetie.”

Immediately Emmy tightened her hold on her brother’s hand and pulled him with her through the hallway to one of the doors, well, to the only door with a big, red bow on it to be exact. Oliver felt his breath getting caught in his throat at the surprised and touched expression in William’s face.

“What’s that?” he asked, probably already assuming what might be behind the door.

“It’s-“

“I suggest,” Felicity quickly interrupted Emmy, “you just open the door and find out.”

William nodded slowly and took in a deep breath before he opened the door and stepped into the room. Emmy giggled nervously, looking at Felicity, and only when her mom nodded her head to follow William, she stepped into the room behind him. Felicity put Tommy to the floor and the three followed Emmy and William inside.

“You have blue walls,” Emmy explained like William couldn’t see, “and a comfy bed and a big closet and a…” – she thought about an adjective to use because describing things had been the game she and Oliver had always been playing lately which was Oliver’s way of making her more aware of her surroundings and helping her to learn more new words at the same time – “nice desk and a cool chair and-“

“Emmy,” Felicity interrupted her gently, “I think William can see all of that.”

Emmy bit down on her bottom lip and nodded. Oliver meanwhile watched William closely as he took in the room, feeling his nervousness increasing with every second the boy just wordlessly looked around.

“The room was originally designed as a nursery. Since we have four of those, we used it as a storeroom in the last years,” Oliver explained nervously. “We figured if you come here more often now, you would like to have your own bedroom, though, so…”

“It’s really great,” William replied with a shy smile.

“You can still change everything,” Oliver explained quickly. “I mean… it’s been awhile since I’ve been a teenager-“

“A long while,” Felicity whispered, and Oliver pinched her in the side gently.

“-so if you don’t like it-“

“No, it’s great,” William replied. Only now broke his smile really through. “Thanks, dad. Thanks, Felicity.”

Oliver smiled with pride. He had put a lot effort into furnishing and decorating the room. He really wanted this to be a home for William and not just a place he spent every other weekend. It was important to him, that important that he had probably unnerved her a lot in the last two weeks.

“And what about ‘thanks, Emmy’?” Emmy asked.

She jumped onto the bed, but one warning gaze of daddy was enough, and she immediately sat down on the edge of the mattress, looking at him innocently. Chuckling quietly, Felicity leaned against Oliver’s side and put her hand to his on the crutch.

“Of course also thanks to you, Emmy,” William sat, sitting down next to Emmy.

“I told you it was great,” Felicity whispered to Oliver.

Turning his head, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Thank you for your support.”

“Always,” Felicity replied with a smile.

Oliver rested his chin on the crown of Felicity’s head that rested on his shoulder. He watched Emmy and William looking around in the room, while Tommy had sat down and was playing with the fringes of the carpet.

“So you really like it, William?”

“Yes, it’s really great.”

“And do you like the wall color?”

“Yes, I love blue.”

“But don’t you think pink is prettier?”

William shot a short glance to Oliver, who quickly shook his head. Emmy could be very stubborn. If William told her that he preferred pink walls, Emmy would unnerve them until they would paint them. And Oliver was sure that a slightly disappointed sister was better for William than a pink room.

“Well, I am a boy…”

“So?” Emmy asked, shrugging her shoulders. “Sometimes I color Tommy’s lips pink with mommy’s lipstick.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “You what?”

Emmy made wide eyes, quickly explaining, “It was just a joke, mommy.”

Of course Felicity didn’t seem to believe her. Instead she looked at Oliver. “Where are you when she does that?”

“Daddy’s playing with your tablet,” Emmy replied for him.

“You what?!”

“I just…” Oliver tried to say something, but he quickly turned to look at Emmeline. “Hey, I thought that was our secret!”

Emmy snorted. “Not anymore.”

“Hey, you still owe me an explanation, mister,” Felicity said strictly, pinching Oliver into the side. “What were you doing with my tablet?”

William chuckled, turning everyone’s attention on them. “You guys are kind of crazy.”

“Well, he _drives_ me crazy,” Felicity replied, looking at Oliver angrily.

Oliver couldn’t hide the grin that spread on his face because of the situation. It should be weird because William was only in this family for a short time, and it should probably feel weird for him to be here during this fight even if it was nothing. It didn’t feel weird, though, because William didn’t seem to mind. He was smiling while Emmy had put an arm around his neck and was whispering something into his ear, he couldn’t understand. So it wasn’t weird at all. It was just… right.

“Okay, who wants pizza?” Oliver asked.

“I do!” Emmy shouted immediately.

“Yes, I wouldn’t say no to that either,” William added.

Tommy giggled and reached out his arms for William, calling out, “Lillam!”

“What?” Felicity asked when Emmy was already running out of the room, and William picked up Tommy and followed his little sister. When Oliver was about to do the same, she quickly held onto his forearm. “Hey, we are not finished here.”

“Oh, but you see… Emmy didn’t have diner yet, and the kids want pizza…”

He quickly limped out of the room and only smiled when Felicity called after him, “We are still going to talk about this, mister!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For chapter 146 we will see wish #4 being fulfilled. You can vote in this [poll](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeHrZnWja4a6XYKDvdlbx8gcLZeJsbQuWjPMGgAsue0VUvfsA/viewform) what fantasy you want to see. I used google docs which should be available to everyone, and not just the ones with twitter. ;)


	144. Girlfriends & boyfriends

“Okay, tell me again why we need to go see them?”

Oliver sighed, arranging the last muffins on the plate, before he turned around to Felicity and kissed the tip of her nose. If he had hoped that it would be enough of an answer for her, he had obviously been wrong. Felicity perked up her eyebrows, looking at him questioningly.

“Felicity, they only moved here a few days ago, and they barely know anyone so far,” Oliver told her, putting her arms around her waist and pulling her against him. “It would be nice if we introduced ourselves to them, right?”

“Yes, but this was supposed to be an evening solely meant for sex, remember?” Felicity asked, cocking her head. “I don’t have to work. Emmy’s visiting her friend and not coming back until tomorrow morning. Tommy is relaxed and will probably fall asleep early today. It is the _perfect_ evening for sex. Sex with a lot of rounds, I might add.”

Oliver chuckled. “We won’t stay long. There will be time for sex after that.”

“What if they are that kind of people who keep us at their place for hours when actually you wanted to only stay for a short visit?”

“I don’t think so,” Oliver replied. “I’ve met them and even got the chance to talk to them. They seemed quite nice. Ian is working full-time at the Redwood United Bank, while Lillian is a stay-at-home mom. Their daughter, Isa, is as old as Tommy. I don’t think they will make us stay with them forever. If the kids get along, though, maybe they will take Tommy from time to time.”

“You really want to give our son into strangers’ hands? They could be serial killers.”

“Okay, didn’t you tell me when Emmy was little that I should stop thinking that everyone who shows interest in our children is a serial killer?”

“Yes, because someone needed to stay sane.”

“I am sane,” Oliver replied. Felicity cocked her head, looking at him doubtingly and making him chuckle. “And I might have run a quick search on them.”

“You? A search?”

“Yes, I did that before you joined the team, too,” Oliver reminded her.

“And you certainly oversaw something,” Felicity mumbled to herself before she asked out loud, “You didn’t use my tablet, right?”

“No, I didn’t,” he answered, rolling his eyes. “To get back to the topic, the reason I think play dates with the neighbors would be great is because when Tommy is with them for an afternoon, it would mean that we, my dear, could have sex in the middle of the day more often again.”

“Okay, I am ready to go,” Felicity replied immediately, “but the muffins will stay here.”

“Why? I baked them solely for them.”

“If stay-at-home Lauren-“

“It’s Lillian.”

“-sees _that_ ,” Felicity continued, gesturing up and down Oliver’s body, “it is already tempting enough to come over to borrow sugar or find any other excuse to come here every day. We don’t want to make it any harder by making her know that you are also a great cook, right?”

Oliver cocked his head slightly. “You really want to eat all fifteen muffins yourself?”

“No,” she replied, straightening up onto the tip of her toes, and pressed a firm kiss to his lips, “I am just trying to be a good neighbor.”

Oliver chuckled. He knew exactly that she just didn’t want to share the muffins he had baked. She could eat a lot of those without feeling nauseous. She had an enormous hunger for such a quite small human being. Emmy was definitely taking after her in that.

“Tommy, come on,” Felicity called out for their son, who was playing in the living room, when she and Oliver strolled towards the door hand in hand.

It didn’t take long for the little boy to come running towards his parents. At the age of almost 18 months now he was looking cuter than ever before. His dark hair had formed to little curls in the last months and with his daddy’s deep blue eyes he could easily be mistaken for a little angel.

Oliver and Felicity took Tommy between them, so he was holding one of each parent’s hands. He smiled proudly when they were walking down the street towards their new neighbors.

They were still several feet away from the house when Oliver could already see the little family in front of their home. Ian was carrying removal boxes from the garage to the front door, while Lillian and Isa were playing with a ball in the front yard.

“It looks like we have visitors, Isa,” Lillian said to her daughter.

Isa, a tiny girl with blonde hair and grey eyes, let the ball she had been holding fall to the ground and looked at the approaching Queen family. She was smiling and waving her hand towards them. Her big eyes took all of them in carefully before they soon focused on Tommy.

“Oliver, it’s so nice to see you again so soon,” Lillian said with a smile. She shook his hand before she turned to Felicity. “You have to be Felicity. Oliver told me a lot about you.”

“Only good things I hope,” Felicity replied with a smile, glancing at Oliver.

“The best,” Oliver and Lillian answered in chorus and all three of them chuckled.

“Isa, do you want to say ‘hi’ to Tommy?” Lillian asked, bending down to her daughter.

Isa didn’t let herself be asked twice. She immediately stepped forward, reaching out a hand for Tommy. The boy took a step back, hiding behind his mother’s legs and wrapping his arms around them.

“Don’t be shy, Tommy,” Oliver asked.

He tried to gently loosen one of his son’s hands from Felicity’s legs, but Tommy held on tightly and pressed his face to the back of his mother’s knees. Isa giggled and leaned against her mother’s legs, never taking her eyes off Tommy, while Lillian was moving a hand over her daughter’s head.

“Oliver, hi,” Ian said, approaching them. The two men shook hands before Ian smiled at Lyla. “Felicity, right?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied. “Nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Ian replied. “I would invite you in, but it looks terrible in there. I am just getting the last boxes in, and-“

“You need help with that?” Oliver asked immediately.

“You’re sure you can do that with the cast?”

“Sure, come on. The sooner we start, the better,” Oliver replied, nodding towards the garage.

Oliver grabbed the first box he could reach and followed Ian towards the house. He hadn’t even put a foot into it when Oliver found that Ian’s words about it looking terrible in there might hold indeed some truth. There were halfway unpacked boxes everywhere, making it look like a real mess.

“I know,” Ian said with a sigh. “I still have hope that we will get this mess under control in the foreseeable time, though.”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s been awhile since Felicity and I moved into our house. I didn’t remember that it looked like that.”

“Just put the box wherever you find room,” Ian suggested when Oliver looked around to find a place to put the box, so Oliver put it onto a closed box.

When they got back outside, Oliver found that Isa had once more started to approach Tommy. She had left her mother’s side to get closer to him, but the little boy didn’t seem to have changed his attitude. Now Isa was chasing Tommy between their mothers’ legs.

“Reminds me a little bit of Faline meeting Bambi the first time,” Oliver said with a chuckle.

Ian glanced at Oliver with a frown. “Bambi? Haven’t watched that in like forever… if I ever did.”

“Give it a few years, and you will be able to speak every Disney movie along,” Oliver replied. “At least if Isa is even a little bit like Emmy.”

The two of them carried a few more boxes to the house until none were left. When they approached their wives that were chatting friendlily, Tommy had seemed to have gotten over his shyness. Isa was holding Tommy’s hand while she seemed to show him the front garden. Oliver smiled at the sight.

“We really have to invite you over here when we got back control over the chaos,” Lillian said with a smile.

“That would be nice, yes,” Felicity replied. “I think our kids get along very well.”

Lillian nodded. “Yes, it seems like it. Who knows? Maybe we can agree on play dates once in awhile. It would be nice if Isa had a friend here. Once the worst chaos is gotten rid off, I will call. Maybe we just try it with Tommy spending an afternoon at our place then. Only if you don’t mind of course.”

“No, absolutely not. It sounds great,” Felicity replied.

Oliver didn’t even have to look at her to know that she was biting her tongue in silent triumph. He hadn’t really thought that they would agree on that so early when he had told Felicity that that was the reason they were coming here. He was quite sure that this idea would bring him a lot of sex, maybe even a little gratitude sex tonight.

“Did you sign Isa in for any local play group?” Oliver asked.

“Yes,” Lillian replied. “I am planning to get back into working soon and thought it was a good idea if Isa was already used to spending time in a day care center.”

Oliver nodded. He couldn’t really concentrate on the conversation anymore because now that the gratitude sex had snuck into his mind, it was impossible to think about it without seeing it right in front of him. It wasn’t exactly easy to be a good neighbor when simultaneously thinking about how your wife would look when coming on top of you.

“We don’t want to slow you down in getting your chaos back under control,” Felicity said after awhile. “And Tommy needs to get his dinner soon.”

“Yes, same with Isa,” Ian replied. “Thanks for coming here.”

“I am sure other neighbors will soon come to welcome you to the street, too,” Oliver replied, shaking Ian’s and Lillian’s hands.

“Tommy, come on,” Felicity called out. “We’re going back home.”

Tommy turned to his mother, looking at her for a long moment, before he tugged at Isa’s hand and the two children went to the adults. They all smiled at the sight.

“Do you want to say goodbye to Isa?” Felicity asked Tommy.

The boy looked at his mom for a long moment before he turned around and carefully hugged Isa. Both children were giggling a little at that, and Tommy seemed to be so ashamed he quickly walked to his mother and hugged her right leg as soon as the hug was over.

“Come on, we will go home now,” Felicity said, taking Tommy’s hand. “It was really nice meeting you.”

“Thanks for coming here,” Ian replied with a smile. “Bye.”

“Bye!” Isa called, waving her hand.

Tommy smiled, but quickly reached out his hands for Felicity to lift him from the floor and, as soon as he was in her arms, he snuggled his cheek to her shoulder and looked down.

“Here we are going back to being shy again,” Felicity said, shrugging her shoulders.

When she and Oliver were strolling up the street back to their house, he couldn’t contain the bright smile. He could see Felicity looking at him from the corner of his eyes.

“Are you smiling that much about the play date that might give us more time for sex or-“

“Tommy has his first girlfriend,” Oliver replied. His smile widened even more.

“Oliver, it was just a hug. I highly doubt our son has any idea what-“

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed her. “Just give me this proud daddy moment.”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head. “I always thought Emmy was going to be the first to have a boy- or girlfriend because… well, you know her. She is the charming one.”

“Emmy was certainly never going to be the kid to find someone first,” Oliver replied.

His baby girl and a boyfriend? Please not! Well, he knew it would happen eventually, but not yet. For now the only boys Emmy should think about was Tommy and her daddy. Everything else would come soon enough.

“Because she is a girl?” Felicity asked, cocking her head and perking up an eyebrow.

“No,” Oliver replied. “Because Tommy’s namesake is Tommy Merlyn, and that guy knew how to pick up girls.”

“You’re saying?” Felicity asked with a quiet chuckle.

“Yes, sometimes Tommy would even play the shy one. The ladies were so into that.”

He smiled as he talked about his friend. It had been awhile since he had last thought about him or talked to Felicity about him. He should go and visit his grave again this week, he decided. It had been awhile since he had done that, too.

There just had been so many other things that had kept him busy. The situation with William, the fight with Felicity… There really hadn’t been much time to think about his deceased friend. Oliver swore himself that he would do it more often again now.

“I only know how he tried to pick up women by intentionally using the lousiest pick-up lines on them,” Felicity said. “Like ‘Are you a vampire? Cause you looked a little thirsty when you looked at me’.”

“I didn’t know that line.” Oliver chuckled. “But it sounds a lot like him because as much as Tommy hated this entire Twilight thing that was going on when I came back, he really knew how to use it for his best- Wait, what?”

“What?” Felicity asked back.

“I didn’t tell you of that pick-up line which means that I haven’t told you he used it,” he stated, looking at Felicity for awhile. “How do you know that line?”

“I am a woman.”

“No,” Oliver almost gasped.

Felicity rolled her eyes. “You can’t say ‘no’ to that, Oliver. You know I am a woman. You have explored my womanhood with your own hands… and some other parts of your bodies to be exact.”

“Yeah, but…” Oliver shook his head. “No.”

“Hey, I spent a lot of time at Verdant before I become a mommy and started doing most things from home,” Felicity replied. “Or do you think I wasn’t hot enough for Tommy to try and hook up with me?”

“You know how much I adore your body, but…” Again Oliver shook his head. “Just no…”

“What can I say?” Felicity asked, shrugging her shoulders casually and pursing her lips. “He was lonely and sad because of you and Laurel. He saw me sitting at the bar and enjoying a drink…”

“No. No, no, no. Just no.”

“Well, he said I was a good listener.”

She emphasized the last words, making it sound like it was most definitely not what he had said. Or if it was what he had said, it had definitely not been what he had meant.

Oliver looked at her for a very long moment, trying to find any proof that she was joking. He was sure that she was joking. He really was sure. She would have told him of that before if it had really happened. She wouldn’t have kept something so huge for him. Of course he had no right and not even a reason to judge given that they hadn’t been together and there was nothing wrong with two singles hooking up with each other. The fact that it would have been his best friend she would have spent a night with, made him sure that, yes, she would have mentioned that to him.

At least he thought is did…

Didn’t you tell a person that you have once hooked up with that person’s best friend before you got marry to them?

His face must have still been quite strained because Felicity started laughing.

“You are mean,” Oliver said, hitting the end of one of his crutches against her leg lightly. “You can’t make me think of my best friend and you together.”

Chuckling, Felicity stepped in front of him. Tommy had already fallen asleep in her arms, probably dreaming of his first love. She straightened onto her tiptoes and kissed him gently.

“I think I would have told you if there had been anything going on,” she told him. “Out of respect for your friendship.”

“Thank you very much,” Oliver replied and pecked her lips once more.

“He did try, but it was so lame and sad,” Felicity said, shaking her head. “I bought him a drink and we talked.”

“I remember you telling me about that. You just left out the attempt of flirting with you.” Oliver nodded with a sigh. “I was a lousy friend.”

“Well, you are a good friend and an amazing husband and father now. And I am sure that wherever Tommy is now, he is happy for you.”

Oliver watched Felicity smiling at him for a long moment before he leaned down and kissed her gently. She sighed into the kiss, stroking her free hand over his stubble. When Oliver leaned back, he smiled at her.

“Let’s go home, so we can use our son’s early sleeping to make you scream my name.”

“Maybe I scream Tommy’s name because, hell, if he hadn’t been so sad that night… I mean… that guy was hot!” she tried to tease him.

Oliver cocked his head. “You really want to call out our son’s name during sex?”

Felicity scrunched her nose. “Yeah, you just ruined that for me.”

Oliver chuckled, continuing to limb to their house. “Glad to hear that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The poll for wish #4](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeHrZnWja4a6XYKDvdlbx8gcLZeJsbQuWjPMGgAsue0VUvfsA/viewform) on Oliver’s sex list is still open, and everything is still possible. Well, everything is possible but the nurse/patient fantasy because that is so far behind, it won’t make it anymore. ;)


	145. Keep this love in a photograph

Oliver woke from the tripping noises the quick, little steps made on the hardwood floor. He quickly turned his head against Felicity’s chest to hide the smile that broke on his face. He did so right in time before the door was flung open.

“Daddy!” Emmy yelled.

She jumped onto the bed and immediately started crawling up his body until she was sitting on his back. Her little hands pushed and pulled at his shoulders as firmly as they probably could. Oliver bit down on his tongue to suppress a chuckle at her eager try.

“Daddy, wake up!”

Felicity groaned under him, and it made her chest vibrate. She tried to turn onto her side, and seemed to only then notice that he was still lying on top on her. It was his favorite position to sleep – wrapped up in her arms with her body beneath him and his ear resting on her chest, listening to her heartbeat.

“Daddy, you gotta wake up!” Emmy called out, continuing to push and pull at his shoulders. “Daddy!”

Oliver stayed unmoving, still pretending to be asleep. He only let out a small sigh to give Emmy a little success.

“Daddy, you-“

“God, Oliver, get the hell out of bed,” Felicity groaned, pushing at his shoulders to make him roll off of her. “Your daughter wants your attention, and your wife wants to sleep. Go and make your ladies happy.”

Oliver groaned dramatically, turning his head to the other side. He didn’t miss how Felicity’s body moved slightly under him when his stubble scratched her delicate skin right over the neckline of the shirt she had borrowed from him.

“I don’t want to get up,” he mumbled, trying to sound as sleepily as possible. “I am tired.”

“But, daddy, it’s Christmas!”

Oliver opened his eyes, looking at Emmy over his shoulder. “Christmas? Are you sure?”

“Yes, daddy! There are presents under the tree.”

Gasping for air, Oliver rolled off Felicity and came to sit on the mattress next to her with Emmy in his lap. He hugged her tightly and kissed her little face and her neck. Emmy was laughing as his stubble was probably tickling her sensitive skin. When he pulled back, he kissed her lips firmly before he glanced at his watch and groaned.

“God, Emmy, it’s six in the morning,” he said, pulling her to his chest and lying back down. “It’s too soon for presents. Your brothers are still asleep and-“

“They are not,” Emmy objected, putting her hands to his chest and pushing herself up until she was sitting on his stomach. “They are downstairs. I woke them for you.”

Before Oliver had the chance to even process his daughter’s words, Felicity was already bursting out into laughter next to him. She turned onto her back, looking at them without stopping to laugh, and Emmy crawled from her father to her mother. She kissed her lips gently as soon as her mom’s laughing had calmed down a little.

“Morning, mommy,” she said with a smile. “Is it time for presents now?”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “Go downstairs and tell your brothers that mommy and daddy will be there in a minute.”

“Yes!” she called out, quickly crawling out of bed and running out of the room.

Oliver turned onto his side, propping his head up onto his hand while he was looking at Felicity with perked up eyebrows.

“So she wakes everyone at six in the morning, and as a reward she gets the presents?”

Chuckling, Felicity turned onto her side, mirroring Oliver’s position. She kissed him gently.

“You are the stay-at-home dad which makes you the responsible parent, while all I have to do is spoiling the kids,” she explained and kissed the side of his jaw. “Besides, last year she woke us at four, so I think this is improvement.”

Oliver took in a deep breath before releasing the air with a sigh. Emmy loved Christmas even a little bit more than he did, so of course she was excited. And if Emmy had any memory of the last years, she probably knew that their usual Christmas tradition had been turned upside this year, which would certainly add to her excitement.

Usually their family would spend Christmas Eve alone at their home, having a nice dinner and just spending time together. They would start handing out presents the next morning before all their friends and the little family they had left would come over to celebrate. With William living in Central City they had chosen to change that tradition and come to Central City where they had rented a house for the holidays. They didn’t want William to spend half of the holidays in an airplane. And since they couldn’t delay the presents without Emmy creating a drama about it, Felicity, Oliver and Samantha had agreed that it was best if William spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning with the Queen Family. They would take him back to Samantha before they would head to Barry and Iris who hosted the traditional Christmas party this year.

“Merry Christmas, Oliver,” Felicity whispered.

Smiling, Oliver leaned forward and kissed her gently. His lips brushed against hers, barely touching, before they pressed down a little bit more firmly. His tongue traced her soft bottom lip, making Felicity sigh. Oliver pulled back slowly to look at her.

“Two happy Christmas holidays in a row,” he said. “I am already afraid what the next one will bring.”

Felicity chuckled, probably knowing too well what he meant. Their first Christmas, when Emmy had been a baby, would have been perfect if Oliver hadn’t made a drama out of Emmy saying ‘dada’ to every man she saw. The second Christmas had been right out horrible because it had taken place in the middle of Felicity’s prenatal depression. They had barely talked to each other and, if they had, it had always ended in a fight. It hadn’t been until last year that they had had their first happy Christmas with kids.

“Maybe we are lucky and will only have happy Christmas holidays from now on,” Felicity replied. “We had a great Chanukah.”

Oliver grinned, remembering the nights they had enlightened the menorah and celebrated that with great sex. He wished he would have gotten rid off his cast before that because-

“Daddy! Mommy!” Emmy called from downstairs. “The clockhand is once around now!”

Felicity and Oliver both chuckled at that.

“Give us another minute, Emmy!” Oliver shouted back. “It won’t take much longer.”

They could hear Emmy groan, but it only made them chuckle more. Agreeing that Emmy would certainly come back upstairs to drag them out of bed when they weren’t downstairs in the living room after the next minute was over, they both rolled out of bed. Oliver put on a shirt and some long sweat pants, while Felicity just slipped into her bathrobe. Hand in hand they strolled downstairs.

“Happy merry Christmas!” Emmy called out and spread her arms as soon as her parents stepped into the living room of the rented house.

Oliver chuckled. She had said ‘happy merry Christmas’ last year already and as soon as he had reminded her of it, she had started doing it again this year. It was adorable to say the least.

Emmy was standing in front of the small Christmas tree they had decorated yesterday morning when they had arrived here with a smile that lit up her entire face. William was sitting on the couch with his eyes closed and his head leaning against the backrest. When Tommy pulled a bauble from the branch he was playing with, William’s eyes snapped open. He blinked a few times before he looked around, orientating himself.

“Do you always get up so early on a Christmas morning?” he asked with a yawn.

Oliver chuckled. “Did Emmy give you any choice to stay in bed?”

“No.”

“There is your answer,” Oliver answered. “Merry Christmas, William.”

Smiling, William got up and hugged Oliver. “Merry Christmas, dad.”

They all wished each other merry Christmas, and Oliver didn’t miss Felicity’s more than surprised face when William hugged her, too. It was a hesitating hug that William pulled out of quickly without looking at Felicity, but it was a hug, and that was all that mattered. The only one who seemed to have no idea what was going on was Tommy. He stayed on Felicity’s arm the entire time, reaching out her hands for the branches of the tree and releasing sounds of discontent when he didn’t get what he wanted.

“Can we start with the presents now?” Emmy asked, jumping onto the couch and pulling at Oliver’s arm. “Please, please, please, please, pleeeease!”

“Fine,” Oliver said with a chuckle. He pulled Emmy from the couch and into his arms. “Who should open the first present?”

Last year it had been Tommy who had been allowed to open the first one. At the young age of six months he had torn the fancy paper, pushed the toy that had been inside away from him and had started playing with the paper. He had been delighted about it to say the least.

“William,” Emmy replied.

William smiled at that, blushing slightly. Emmy meanwhile moved wildly in Oliver’s arms until he set her down on the floor with a sigh. Immediately she ran over to the presents he and Felicity had placed under the tree before they had gone to bed last night. She looked at them closely.

“Mommy, which one is the special one?”

“The special one?” Felicity asked, stepping next to Emmy. Tommy released a low cry when that took him away from the tree and the star he had just wanted to take off one of the branches.

“Yes,” Emmy replied. “The one that Santa didn’t bring.”

“Oh, that one,” Felicity replied with a knowing smile, while Oliver frowned. “I think it’s that with the red bow.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, very,” Felicity replied, nodding her head.

While Felicity put Tommy to the floor, so he could walk back to the tree, Emmy quickly ran over to William. He crawled next to him on the couch and held out the present for her half-brother.

“Santa didn’t bring this,” Emmy explained to him. “I made it. Mommy helped a little. Tommy not so much, but that’s okay. He is cute.”

“Thank you,” William whispered, taking the present.

While he was opening the present, Oliver stepped next to Felicity. He put an arm around her waist and kissed her temple before he whispered into her ear, “Why don’t I know about this special present?”

“It was Emmy’s idea,” Felicity explained in a whisper. “She asked if Santa was going to give William an extra present because he is part of the family now, but he hasn’t been for so long. So I told her that maybe it was nice if we helped Santa with that and made him a special present.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Oliver asked.

Felicity smiled, kissing the underside of his jaw. “We girls need to have our little secrets now that you guys are in the majority.”

“We can easily change that,” Oliver replied, wiggling with his eyebrows.

“Oh, I don’t think I want to exchange Tommy for a girl,” Felicity replied. “I just got used to him.”

Chuckling, Oliver pulled Felicity in front of him, so her back was resting against his chest. He pressed a kiss to her neck, then leaned his lips against her ear. “We both know I didn’t mean that.”

Felicity only smiled, looking at William, Emmy and Tommy, who was now climbing on the couch to his siblings. Oliver dropped the topic, following Felicity’s gaze towards their kids. His arms tightened around Felicity’s waist in the meantime.

When the fancy paper was torn away from around the present, William was holding a photo album in his hands. The cover was made of light brown leather. He moved the palm of his hand over the leather carefully. Loosening herself from his arms, Felicity took Oliver’s hand and pulled him over to the couch. They both sat down on the backrest of the couch together, looking at the album.

“You gotta open it,” Emmy stated, looking at William.

William nodded slowly before he did as Emmy had suggested. He opened the first page and looked at a photo of them five. They had taken it during his first visit at their place.

“That’s me,” Emmy explained, pointing at herself on the photo.

“Emmy, I am sure William can see that,” Oliver told her, while simultaneously putting his hand to Tommy’s back to give him more stability when he stood up on the couch.

William looked at the photo for a long moment before he turned the page, looking at two photos of Oliver’s and Felicity’s wedding. The first one was only them, the other them with all of their few guests.

“That’s aunt Thea,” Emmy explained.

“Yeah, I remember from my last visit,” William replied, nodding his head. “She stopped by to meet me then. She was nice.”

He continued to look through the photos. Felicity and Emmy had put together their whole life, from the wedding over the births of Emmy and Tommy up to the last months with William. Emmy tried to make him look at the photo of her taking a photo of baby Tommy forever, explaining that it was probably the most beautiful in the album. Yet William managed to get to the last page that showed the first photo again. Some scribble under it looked suspiciously like Emmy had tried to maybe write something.

“It’s supposed to mean ‘Welcome to the family’,” Felicity explained.

“Mommy, William can read that,” Emmy told her mother before looking at her brother. “Or can’t you read yet?”

“William can read, sweetie, but you can’t exactly write,” Oliver told her. He brushed his lips against his daughter’s temple. “But thank you for all of this.”

William was suspiciously quite. He didn’t say a word, just staring at the picture of the five of them together in their garden.

“O my god,” Felicity suddenly gasped. “This album was a bad idea, right? It was insensitive because you have to look at all the photos of your dad and this family he had for years, while you have only been part of that for a few months. And of course now you feel like you missed all of that and hate us because we are basically rubbing your nose in that and-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her gently. Felicity took in another breath to keep talking, but Oliver quickly put a hand to hers on her thigh, and she kept quiet. Slowly Oliver loosened his hand from Felicity and put it to William’s shoulder. “Everything alright, William?”

“Yes,” the boy replied. “I… I love this very much.”

“Are you sure?” Felicity asked. “Because if you feel like it was insensitive-“

“No,” William interrupted her with a shake of his head. When he looked at them, Oliver could see tears in his eyes. “I am just happy to be part of this family now.”

“Of course you are a part of this family,” Felicity replied with a smile. “And you always will be.”

Oliver couldn’t count how many times he had thought it wouldn’t be possible to love either of his two ladies more than he already did, and yet they always proved him wrong. He had stopped wondering about it. Emmy and Felicity just had hearts that could give and give and give. It was amazing.

So this Christmas, celebrated with a happy Felicity and great children, that even included a son he hadn’t even known one year ago, might be the best he had ever had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have a winner for wish #4. I hope to be able to post Tuesday, but it might take until Wednesday. ;)


	146. Relaxing after hours

Oliver tapped the end of the pen on the tabletop of the desk impatiently and shot another glance at his watch. He leaned back in the office armchair with a sigh, looking around in the spacious room.

It had been twenty minutes since he had arrived here in a great looking suit with suspenders and tie, being all prepared for his forth sex wish to be fulfilled. Felicity had led him into her office and told him to wait here until she was ready for him. Then she had disappeared and since then she had not come back.

It had been so long since he had last been here, Oliver realized. There hadn’t been much time to visit Felicity during work in the last year, especially because of her important project with Wayne Enterprise and the complicated situation with William. He made a mental note to do better this year just like his New Year’s resolution had been to do better about everything regarding his family and especially Felicity. He had-

“Mr. Queen?”

Oliver looked up, feeling his mouth watering at the sight. Felicity was wearing the very same dress that she had been wearing the day he had told her that she was going to be his personal assistant. The grey, formfitting fabric accentuated the best parts of her body – her long legs and the well-formed curve of her ass. He had always had a weakness for that dress.

“Ms. Smoak,” Oliver replied, doing his best to hide his smile.

“The conference room is now set up, so we can prepare you for the presentation.”

Oliver bit down on his cheek. He loved how Felicity put thoughts into all the little details to make his sex fantasy as real as possible. _Back to old days – I as the CEO and you as my PA. Let’s have sex on the conference table._ That had been all he had written down on the card he had put in an envelope and given to Felicity. She was making a whole story out of that, though, and Oliver loved that.

“You know, Ms. Smoak, I think since we’re working so late, we might need some coffee to keep us awake. Don’t you want to get us some?”

“Oh, I would Mr. Queen, but it seems that someone has broken our coffee machine,” Felicity replied with the same tone in her voice there had been when she had said it the first time years ago.

“Violently, I assume?” Oliver asked back, remembering all too well how she had hissed that little word before leaving the office to him and Sebastian Blood.

“Yes, probably.”

Felicity kept a straight face, not showing any sign of amusement, but Oliver knew better. There was a barely visible glint in her eyes that betrayed her.

“If you may follow me now please?” she asked.

Oliver got up, fastening up the jacket of his suit. He let Felicity lead the way, following two steps behind, so he could use the short time of the way to admire her ass. When Felicity turned her head over her should after half of the way, she perked up her eyebrows at how low his eyes had been on her body. Oliver only smiled at her smugly.

The smile quickly faded away, though, when he saw what she had prepared in the conference room. Two laptops were set up next to piles of papers and files. That looked suspiciously like actual work.

“What is this?” it escaped him before he had been able to stop himself.

“Those are the contracts and files we need to work through for your presentation, Mr. Queen,” Felicity replied innocently, but she wasn’t able to keep a straight face when she looked at him this time. Her amusement about his probably dumbfounded face just shone through. Oliver just knew that she enjoyed that way too much, but he wouldn’t allow her to win.

“Thank you for this careful preparation, Ms. Smoak.”

“Of course, Mr. Queen.”

They sat down at the conference table next to each other. When Felicity took the first file from the pile, she slid a little closer to him. Her knee touched his, and when Oliver looked down, he saw that the hem of her dress had slid up enough to reveal that she was wearing stockings and straps. Oliver suppressed a groan. It would be a nightmare to try to concentrate on any work with that knowledge in the back of his mind.

He did his best, though. He followed each of Felicity’s suggestions, worked through file after file with her and didn’t even complain once. He just used every occasion there was to brush his hand against her fingers or her arm and take a look at her breasts and, when she leaned forward to get a new file, he leaned back in his chair to watch the perfect curve of her butt.

He didn’t know how long Felicity wanted to go with this, but it seemed like she made no attempt to get from the work to the fun part. More than two hours had passed already. Oliver had loosened his tie, gotten rid of his suit jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. He was exhausted, even had the slightest of a headache when finally Felicity suggested, “Maybe we should take a little break.”

“Excellent idea,” Oliver said. He dropped the pen to the conference table and leaned back in his chair with a sigh, closing his eyes. “I forgot how exhausting this is.”

Felicity chuckled, “Well, being the CEO of a multibillion dollar corporation is not just fun and games.”

“No, it’s not,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “How long do you think we will still have to work?”

“A little,” Felicity replied. He could hear her getting up and was tempted to open his eyes, but he kept them closed instead. He didn’t regret it when he felt her fingers against his temple, gently massaging. “Maybe you just need a little relaxation before we can continue.”

“Relaxation sounds great.”

Oliver hummed at how gentle her fingers worked on his skin. They applied a little pleasure and worked right where he needed them the most – well, where his head needed them the most because some lower parts of his body could use some of her hands’ attention, too. He enjoyed the gentle caress as long as it lasted, but didn’t mind when her hands slowly moved down the sides of his neck to his shoulders. Felicity massaged them for a few minutes, making his tight muscles relax under her touch.

When her hands moved lower, Felicity took away his tie and unbuttoned the two topmost buttons of his shirt. Her fingers moved beneath the fabric of his shirt then and slid down his naked skin. Her fingertips traced his scars, knowing exactly where to find each of them. She had memorized his body as well as he had memorized hers.

Felicity leaned down, resting her lips against the shell of his ear, and whispered, “Do you want me to help you relax, Mr. Queen?”

“If that is no trouble to you, Ms. Smoak.”

“Well, we want to work through the rest of the files, don’t we?” she asked.

“Yes.”

Felicity brushed her lips against his earlobe before grazing it with her teeth. It only lasted a second, though, before she straightened back up. Oliver kept his eyes closed, waiting for her to continue as she pleased.

He licked his lips in anticipation when he heard the sound of a zipper being lowered. The next second his chair was being turned, so Oliver opened his eyes, keeping his gaze down on the floor. The first thing he saw was the fabric of her dress pooling on the tiles right behind Felicity’s stilettos. He let his gaze travel up her long legs that still wore the stockings to the straps. He felt his mouth water even more when he saw that the straps were fasted to a garter belt, and she wasn’t wearing any panties. Neither was she wearing a bra.

“Ms. Smoak, I see you didn’t come unprepared.”

Felicity smiled smugly while approaching him slowly. She climbed onto to his chair, straddling him by kneeling over him. Her hands held onto the backrest, while Oliver’s were resting on the armrests of his chair. His fingertips were tingling with the need to touch her, but he left the lead to Felicity instead.

“I hope this will help you relax, Mr. Queen,” Felicity whispered, licking her red painted lips and lifting his hands to her ribs.

“It already does,” Oliver replied.

He straightened up on the chair, unable to continue this even a second longer without kissing her. His lips only got to brush against hers, though, because Felicity kept right out of his reach. Oliver growled.

“Felicity-“

“I can’t remember offering you to call me by my first name, Mr. Queen.”

“Such a shame,” Oliver replied.

He lifted one hand to the back of her head and pulled her down, so her lips came crushing down onto his. Immediately they opened up to one another, their tongues moving out to fight for dominance. Felicity’s hands clawed in his hair, while her hips starting moving on top of him, thrusting down onto him.

Oliver growled into the kiss. He pulled her hair tie from her hair to loosen it from her usual high ponytail before he put his hands to both sides of her hips and encouraged her movements. He could feel himself growing harder in his pants, the pleasure building in the pit of his stomach.

When Oliver thrust up against her, Felicity let her head fall back into her neck with a long moan. Oliver didn’t waste a second and used the opportunity to let his lips travel down her body. He sucked, licked and nibbled his way down her neck, staying at her pulse point for a little longer to make sure that he was leaving his mark there.

“Oliver,” Felicity growled when she noticed what he was doing.

Oliver chuckled against her skin, replying, “I don’t remember offering you to call me by my first name, Ms. Smoak.”

“Such a shame,” Felicity replied.

Oliver bent his head back to kiss Felicity’s full lips once more. He ended the kiss with a gentle bite to her bottom lip before he returned his attention to her neck. He kissed his way down from the juncture of her neck and shoulder over her cleavage to her right breast. Bending her back a little, he lowered his lips to her right nipple, closing his mouth around it.

“Yes,” Felicity whispered with another moan.

He sucked the hardening nipple between his lips, grazing his teeth over the sensitive skin and pulling slightly. Felicity hissed, but the way her hips moved faster on him told her that she was enjoying this. He opened his mouth around her nipple once more, moving his flat tongue against it.

Felicity panted, tightening her hold on the back of his head for a moment to keep him in place. Her hands loosened from his hair eventually, though. They moved down and unbuckled his belt without any hesitation. While Oliver switched to her left nipple, giving it the same caress as her right nipple before, Felicity unbuttoned his pants and opened the zipper. Her gentle hands pulled down the boxer briefs as far as possible in the position and freed his hardened cock from the fabric.

She caught his cock between his lower stomach and her pelvis. When she moved down, sliding her clit down his erection, Oliver’s head dropped back. He groaned and tightened his hold on her hips. She was already so wet for him, and the torturously slow way she rubbed herself against him to pleasure herself made his stomach tighten.

Quickly he got up, lifting Felicity against him. He kicked their chair back behind him and carried Felicity the two steps to the conference table where he sat her down on the edge of the table. Slowly he leaned forward, forcing Felicity to lean back at the same time. She angled her head to kiss him, but just like she had done before he kept right out of reach. With one quick movement he wiped the table free behind her. Papers and files were falling to the floor, leaving a terrible mess.

He didn’t waste much thought on it, though. Instead of that Oliver pulled Felicity from the edge of the conference table and turned her around, so her back was pressed to his front. His arms wrapped around her from behind, holding her to him. His fingertips grazed against her nipples while his naked erection was sliding back and forth between her wet folds. Felicity gasped for breath quietly when the head of his cock bumped against her clit.

Oliver lowered his lips to the side of her neck, sucking the red mark he had left there into his mouth slightly. Slowly he moved his lips up her neck to her ear and whispered with husky voice, “Bend over.”

Felicity moaned, but she did as he said. She bent over until her naked breasts pressed to the cold tabletop. Oliver watched her almost completely naked body for a long moment. The delicate skin of her naked back was just beautiful.  Her small waist and the inviting hips just accentuated her ass even better.

“Mr. Queen?” Felicity asked. Wiggling her butt, she looked back at him over her shoulder and said in an amused sing-song, “I am waiting.”

“Patience is a virtue, Ms. Smoak,” Oliver replied.

He lifted his finger and moved it in a circle to make her turn back around. Felicity rolled her eyes, but she did turn around, still wiggling her ass in front of him. Chuckling quietly, Oliver just watched her for another moment before he put his hands to her hips to make her hold still. He moved his left hand a little more to her butt, letting his thumb feel the soft lace of the garter belt. His right hand lifted from her body to reach out for the topmost part of her spine he could reach before moving his flat hand down her spine.

“You look beautiful,” he whispered with husky voice. “So beautiful.”

He leaned down, blanketing her body with his. Slowly he kissed the same path down her spine his hand had taken before. He peppered kiss after kiss down her back until he reached her tailbone. He smiled for a second before he licked the same way up her spine again.

Felicity hummed, slightly moving beneath him. He kept her hips in a tight grip, though, to make her stop moving.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked when he didn’t continue to kiss or lick or caress her back in any other way. “Was the work too exhausting for you to even relax appropriately?”

“Ms. Smoak, that is not how you should talk to me,” Oliver told her, trying to sound strictly, but the amusement in his voice betrayed him. “I am your boss.”

He bit down on her shoulder gently before he moved his lips a little lower and caressed the scar the bullet she had taken for Sara years ago had left there. He always gave her scars the same gentle treatment she gave his. While he was nibbling at her scarred skin, he moved his hands to his shoulders to push down the suspenders. His pants slid down his legs to his knees.

Oliver parted his legs a little bit, getting a better stand, before he grabbed hold of his erection and moved the head of it through Felicity’s wet folds. Her head dropped forward, resting on her right hand on the tabletop. He could see her biting down on her bottom lip as a long moan escaped her lips.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity whispered.

Slowly he moved the head of his cock from her entrance to her clit and back once more, asking, “What did you want to say, Ms. Smoak?”

Felicity groaned, making Oliver bite his tongue. He enjoyed this way too much, Oliver had to admit. He didn’t know what he had thought when he had written down this wish on the card and given it to Felicity. It had probably been a subconscious thought about the past and the time they had worked together here. Maybe he was choosing his wishes the way he could pretend there were memories of Felicity in his past before she had been to him who she was now. Now he had that imagine of her in Russia and this one here to cover the dark days of his past.

“Mr. Queen, please,” Felicity pleaded.

Oliver grinned smugly. He couldn’t say that he didn’t like being called Mr. Queen. It had something very sexy to it, at least when it came from her lips.

He lined himself up with her entrance and slowly entered her, so only the head of his cock was inside of her. Felicity moaned. Her hands formed to fists on the table and her hips tried to move back against him, but Oliver held them in a tight grip, making it impossible for her to move.

Oliver thrust forward torturously slowly. She was wet and warm, welcoming him so gladly. Once he was buried in her up to the hilt, Oliver leaned back down, blanketing Felicity’s back with his chest once more. He pressed his hips to hers as much as possible, moving them in a circle to make his cock press against her inner walls. Oliver bit down on her shoulder, and Felicity moaned.

Part of him wanted to just go slow and make it last as long as possible, but he knew that side would eventually lose to the part of him that just wanted to take her with quick and firm thrusts. Having her bent over the conference table was just too good.

“We still have work to do, Mr. Queen,” Felicity reminded him like she knew exactly what dilemma he was in. “Maybe you should hurry up a little.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to her shoulder before he took her hands and in his. He linked their fingers on the tabletop over her head. His nose buried into her head, breathing in the sweet scent of her shampoo.

“You want it fast and hard?” Oliver asked with hoarse voice.

“Yes,” Felicity replied without any hesitation. “Fast and hard please.”

Oliver tightened his hold on her fingers before he pulled out and thrust back in firmly. The movement made Felicity’s hips move forward against the edge of the table. Quickly Oliver loosened his right hand from Felicity’s and moved his fingers down, so his forearm kept Felicity’s hips from bumping against the edge of the table when Oliver thrust into her the next time.

Oliver set a quick, steady pace. He thrust out halfway before he thrust back in firmly. Each time he was buried into her to the hilt, Felicity’s hips bumped against his forearm. Her right hand clawed onto the back of his left hand, her nails digging into his skin.

Felicity was panting. Her hips were meeting his thrusts eagerly, trying to get him to hurry up even more. Oliver knew that she needed to come soon because he wasn’t going to hold on much longer. Her walls were tightening around him, holding him in a firm grip that made it harder and harder for him to hold on. He wanted to make her come first, but the feeling of Felicity moving beneath him, the sound of his pelvis slapping against her ass with each thrust and the little moans that escaped her lips were pushing him faster to the edge than he wanted.

“Felicity,” he whispered desperately, trying to make her know how close he was.

“Just a little longer,” she pleaded.

Oliver groaned, burying his nose back in her hair and gritting his teeth. He hadn’t thought having sex in the conference room they had worked in together so often would turn him on so much. He had had sex with Felicity in this building several times before, but usually it had been in her office or maybe a few times in the elevator. He didn’t know what was so different about the conference room that made it so hard to hold on now.

He bit down on her shoulder, squeezing his eyes shut. He already felt the tingling at the end of his spine and-

“Hey, what are you doing?” Felicity asked when he pulled out.

Oliver answered by turning her around to him and kissing her fiercely. He was still fighting his orgasm, and he knew that he needed a change of position to delay it. He moved his hands to the back of her knees and lifted Felicity onto the table. She was about to pull him between her spread thighs, but Oliver pushed her more onto the table until she was almost sitting in the middle of it. Her eyes glinted when he crawled onto the table and hovered over her.

His lips met hers in a gentle kiss when he leaned down and rested his body on top of hers. Her right hand moved between them and positioned him back at her entrance and when Oliver thrust back into her, her legs came wrapping around his hips, so the heels of her stilettos were pressing against his butt.

The position didn’t allow him to thrust as deeply into her as he had been able to do before, but his pelvis rubbed perfectly against her clit, increasing her pleasure. Oliver took her hands from the back of his neck and linked their fingers on the tabletop, breaking the kiss.

He locked eyes with her, watching her face slowly. He knew she was growing so much closer to her orgasm. The way her heels dug into his butt more and more firmly and the way she was panting with her lips being opened told him so.

Oliver’s thrusts grew even firmer. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room and was only accompanied by their heavy pants. Oliver tightened his hold on Felicity’s fingers.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she panted.

It only took three more thrusts for both of them to come together with their eyes being locked and their fingers squeezing each other’s so tightly that their knuckles had turned white. Oliver emptied inside of her, his seed filling her, while her walls seemed to milk him for every last drop until he had nothing left to give.

He was breathing heavily when he came down from high, but he lowered his lips to Felicity’s despite the burning of his lungs. They kissed gently without any battle for dominance, wordlessly thanking each other for the intimacy and pleasure of the last minutes. Oliver pushed his hands under Felicity’s body and rolled them around, switching positions, so he was lying beneath her now.

When their lips parted, Felicity dropped her head to his shoulder with a sigh. She turned her face to kiss his Bratva tattoo before snuggling her cheek back to his shoulder and pressing her forehead to the side of his neck.

“This was great,” she mumbled. “So, so great. I am looking forward to the next wish already.”

Oliver chuckled. “I will try to find a great one for the last.”

“You know, it doesn’t have to be the last,” Felicity replied, drawing random patterns on his chest with her fingers. “We could just continue doing this.”

“Why don’t you make your own wish list?” Oliver suggested. “I think I would like to return this favor.”

Felicity smiled against his neck, pressing a kiss to his collarbone. “Maybe someday.”

Oliver turned his head to kiss Felicity’s forehead. His hand moved through her hair lazily while he was just staring at the ceiling.

“What was this long working before the sex by the way?” he asked after awhile.

Felicity chuckled. “You know, I wanted some fun, too.”

“And you want to tell me you didn’t have fun just now?”

“Oh, I did,” she replied. “I just also wanted to have my fun watching you realizing that you being the CEO and me being your PA is certainly not what you want in life.”

“Of course that is not what I want. I want to be a stay-at-home dad and raise our kids.”

“Good,” Felicity replied, propping her head back up onto her hand to look at him, “because I like it the way it is.”

Oliver smiled. “So do I.”

“Good,” Felicity replied and leaned down and kissed Oliver gently. “I like working here.”

“I like being at home with our kids.”

“Well, I like that too, but-“

“Hey, you don’t need to explain anything,” Oliver interrupted her. “You are doing great at leading the company, and you are an amazing mom. One of us needs to have a job that makes money, and I am glad that you find happiness in that. And I am very happy that you will think of me every time you look at this conference table from now on.”

Oliver grinned smugly, while Felicity chuckled.

“Well, I won’t have to look at it for long because I already ordered a new one.”

“You what?”

“Well, you didn’t really think I was going to keep a conference table we had sex on, right?”

“Of course I did,” Oliver replied. “You also kept the desk in your office though he had sex on that.”

“It’s different with the desk.”

“Why?”

“Because I say so,” Felicity simply replied.

Oliver bit his tongue for the break of a second before he stated, “Okay, we really should go on with fulfilling wishes from my sex list.”

“Oliver, we are not having sex on the new table.”

“Yes, we will.”

“Nope, we certainly won’t.”

“Well, we will see who will win that challenge, Ms. Smoak.”

Felicity laughed. “It’s Mrs. Queen again now.”


	147. When time flies

Felicity turned onto her other side with a yawn and blindly reached out her hand for Oliver like she always did when she woke up. Somehow it had turned into a habit of hers. All her hand met was the empty sheet beside her, though. Groaning quietly, Felicity opened one eye to find that the bedside next to her was indeed left. Oliver must have crawled out of bed while she had been sleeping.

“Oliver?”

Slowly Felicity sat up in bed and moved her hands over her face, trying to rub the tiredness away. When she didn’t get an answer, she glanced at the clock on her nightstand and groaned at the early hour. How could he be awake so early on a Sunday morning especially when it hadn’t been Emmy waking them up, so she would get her presents sooner?

Usually their little birthday girl always took care that her birthday was a long day for their family. She woke them early in the morning and stayed awake until late in the evening. With The birthday party in between it was an exhausting, yet joyful day for all of them.

She considered just lying back down and continuing to sleep, catching some energy that she would need to get through the long day,  but she decided that she should rather find Oliver and drag him back to bed with her. Falling asleep was just so much easier with his comforting weight resting on top of her and the quiet sound of him snoring against her neck.

So Felicity got herself out of bed and sauntered towards the door. She took a look into both directions, but couldn’t see Oliver. She didn’t need to see him, though. She had a strong feeling where he was, anyway. Felicity buttoned up Oliver’s white shirt she wore while heading towards Emmy’s room.

Just like she had thought she would, Felicity found Oliver leaning in the frame of the door to Emmy’s room. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest. His head rested against the wood of the door frame, and his eyes were focused on the bed.

Smiling, Felicity approached Oliver. She wrapped her arms around him from behind, leaning her cheek against his right shoulder blade.

“Morning,” Oliver whispered.

He moved his right arm to wrap it around Felicity’s shoulders and pull her closer to his side. Felicity took a step forward and rested one hand on his back, the other on his chest over his heart, feeling it beating strongly. Oliver pressed his lips to the crown of her head and tightened his hold on her shoulders.

“I think it’s too early to really call it morning,” Felicity whispered. “It’s not even six. Why aren’t you in bed?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Oliver replied.

“Usually when you can’t sleep, you try to distract yourself by having a little fun with your half-naked wife.”

Oliver chuckled quietly, pressing his lips to the crown of her head once more. “I thought my half-naked wife deserved some sleep for once, especially given how exhausting this day will be.”

“Well, in that case you should have stayed in bed.”

“I just wanted to take a look at the kids,” Oliver replied with a quiet sigh, “but then I found them sleeping so peacefully, and it got me thinking.”

Felicity took a closer look at Emmy’s bed. It was indeed not only Emmy lying under the blanket, but also Tommy. She must have helped him out of his bed and taken her here with him. Usually she was just sneaking into his crib and staying there when she didn’t want to sleep alone. Apparently she had decided that Tommy’s crib was too small for the both of them and decided to take her little brother with to her bed instead.

When Felicity looked back at Oliver, she frowned slightly. His eyes were focused on their kids. The expression in his face was almost unreadable. Felicity didn’t think it was worry in his face, but there were definitely a lot of things going on in his head right now.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked him.

She rested her chin on his shoulder to look at him and tightened her arms around his waist to reassure Oliver that she was here for him.

“Do you remember how we celebrated her birthday last year?”

“In bed because we were all still recovering from being abducted by our crazy stalkers?” Felicity asked, remembering that all too well.

Oliver nodded. “I still remember this so well like it just happened, but then… Emmy is four years old now already.”

“I know,” Felicity replied with a smile, turning her head so she could look at Emmy. Her face was hidden under her messy bed hair. One of her blonde curls lifted slightly from her face whenever she breathed out. “It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

“I think it’s rather scary,” Oliver replied.

Felicity turned her head back to Oliver, looking him up closely. When she saw the slight wrinkle between his eyebrows forming, she lifted her hand and smoothed his forehead with her thumb. Oliver didn’t look at her, but he lifted his hand with a smile and pressed a grateful kiss to her knuckles.

“What’s scary?”

“Them growing up,” Oliver replied, only now turning his head to look at Felicity. “It’s like yesterday we were in the hospital and held Emmy for the first time, and then she turned one and two and three… And now she is already four years old. In no time she will go to kindergarten and then to elementary and middle and finally high school and then college. She will have boyfriends and get her heart broken, and I am not going to be daddy any longer, but rather dad and-“

“Easy, daddy,” Felicity interrupted him, stroking her hand over his chest. “Always one step at a time. Next year she will start kindergarten, and the rest we will see.”

“Doesn’t that scare you at all?”

“What? That she is growing up eventually?”

“Yes, I…” Oliver started, but he interrupted himself, sighing. “I don’t know, but I am not ready to let them go just yet.”

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“She is four, not eighteen,” she told him.

Oliver chuckled. “I know I am just… I am just scared that time keeps flying by this fast, and we will have to let go of them before we’re ready or they are ready. What if we don’t teach them everything they have to know to be prepared for all the pain and obstacles the world might throw at them and… I don’t know… I think I just obsessed over this too much in the last minutes.”

Felicity smiled, moving her flat hand over his naked chest once more. She knew that Oliver always needed some time when they reached a big milestone in his life to withdraw himself. He always took those occasions as a reason to think about their lives, what had happened and what was to expect in the future.

Given all he had been forced to live through in his past, Felicity understood that.

“Do you think we forgot to teach Emmy and Tommy anything so far?” Felicity asked.

Oliver looked at the kids for a long moment, concentrating on Felicity’s question, before he sighed. “I don’t know. I am just worried that we might have.”

Felicity smiled. Oliver had always wanted to be a good dad. From the moment they had found out she was pregnant with Emmy, he had tried to be perfect with her, and Felicity knew that if someone had the chance to become the perfect dad, it was Oliver. If he wasn’t perfect already, he was at least close to it.

“I think we did a pretty good job so far,” Felicity told him. “Our children are protected and happy, and for now that is all that should matter. As long as that is, I think we can be quite proud of ourselves. At least I am. Proud of us, I mean.”

“I guess I should be proud of us too then, right?”

Oliver turned around, so his back was resting against the doorframe. He pulled Felicity close, until her chest pressed to his. He was smiling at her, warming Felicity from the inside out.

“I love you,” he whispered. He didn’t give her the chance to say it back. Instead of that he ducked his head and kissed Felicity gently. His hands moved lower on her back until they reached her butt. “How about we go back to bed and celebrate Valentine’s Day before the kids wake up.”

“Great idea,” Felicity whispered back against his lips.

Oliver lifted Felicity against him and carried her to their bedroom. They kissed the entire way there, their lips never parting for longer than it took them to take in another breath. Oliver lay Felicity down on the bed, hovering over her. His hands just started lifting the hem of his shirt on her body when the door was flung open, and Emmy appeared in the door frame.

“It’s my birthday!”

Oliver chuckled, casually pushing the hem of Felicity’s clothing back down, before he rolled himself of her and sat down on the mattress next to her. As soon as he spread his arms, Emmy came running into them.

“Happy birthday, sweetie,” he whispered to her hair.

“Thanks, daddy.”

Felicity watched the two of them for a long moment before she slid closer and hugged the both of them together.

“You’re interrupting my daddy-daughter-moment,” Oliver whispered to her with a grin.

“Well, Emmy ruined our moment and I am ruining yours, now you just need to ruin Emmy’s and mine, and we are all even I think.”

Oliver thought about that for a moment. “Yeah, that was too much for me. I am just going to…”

He didn’t finish the sentence, just wrapping one arm around Felicity and holding both his girls to him. Felicity closed her eyes with a sigh, stroking her hand over their daughter’s curly hair.

Oliver might be right. Time really was flying by all too often, but right in this moment time just seemed to stand still.


	148. A reminder

“Emmy, Deepa, be careful when you’re in the water,” Oliver called back over his shoulder to the girls. “William, could you-?”

“Already on my way,” William replied, quickly getting up on his feet and running to where Emmy and her best friend Deepa were playing in the small stream.

The stream that ran through the park had recently been restored which was why Oliver and Felicity had decided to use this sunny February day to take the kids here. They loved spending time in the park anyway, and with the stream it was now an even better place to play for them. Well, it would be if Oliver let them.

“Oliver, hon, try to relax a little,” Felicity told him with a chuckle, moving her hand up and down his bicep. “The water only reaches up to their ankles and the current is basically inexistent.”

“I just want them to be careful,” Oliver replied, shooting another look back over his shoulder to where Emmy and Deepa were now showing William something in the water.

“They are careful,” Felicity assured him. “And if they happen to be not careful, the worst that will happen is that they fall onto their butts. We would be there in five seconds. Well, I would be there in five seconds. You would need two seconds at max. Nothing bad can happen.”

Oliver took in a deep breath. “You’re right. Sorry.”

“Hey, you don’t have to apologize,” Felicity assured him. “Just try to relax a little.”

Oliver nodded. “Okay.”

Felicity watched him closely. Oliver took in a deep breath, closing his eyes. He smiled slightly, continuing to breathe in and out evenly. The tension that had been in his body slowly faded, making it seem like he was relaxed, but Felicity knew better.

“I know that you are still worrying.”

Chuckling, Oliver opened his eyes. “You know me too well.”

“I don’t think there is such thing as knowing someone too well,” Felicity replied, “or at least there isn’t for the two of us.”

Oliver looked at her with an expression full of love. He was giving her his best heart eyes, and it didn’t fail to make Felicity’s stomach flutter. She was just about to tell him to stop looking at her like that when-

“Mama!”

Tommy didn’t seem to be too pleased about the fact that his mother’s attention had turned from him to his daddy. He stood between Felicity’s spread legs on the grass of the riverside with his hands put to her cheeks and tried to turn her face back to him.

“What’s going on, buddy?” Felicity asked.

“Mama, stone!”

Tommy lifted a stone from the grass and gave it to Felicity. He had developed a love for stones lately. Whenever he found one, he tried to take him with him and could get quite uncomfortable when he didn’t get his will. He had his own small collections of stones in a basket in the garden now.

“Do you want to take this stone home?” Felicity asked.

Tommy nodded, already bending his knees to lift another stone from the ground and put it onto the flat palm of Felicity’s hand.

“Tommy, you can’t take both stones,” Felicity told him. “You have to pick. Which one do you want to take home?”

Tommy seemed to think about it for a moment before he took the second stone from Felicity’s hand and turned around to Oliver. “Dada, stone!”

He now handed the stone to his father. Oliver lifted it in front of his eyes to eye it up before he said, “Wow, that stone is beautiful, Tommy. Do you want to take it home?”

Tommy nodded eagerly, so Oliver pulled him in front of him and whispered something into his ear. Felicity couldn’t understand a word, but given that Tommy put his forefinger onto his lip and nodded, she was sure that it was about keeping the stone a secret from her. If Tommy continued like this, they would be able to build a wall around their property with the stones he had collected in no time.

It was worth it, though, when Tommy turned around and smiled brightly. Well, if collecting stones was what made him happy, Felicity was the last person to stop him.

“Dad?” William called from the stream where he was crouching next to Emmy and Deepa. “Dee’s bracelet got lost, and we can’t find it. We could use some help.”

“Coming!” Oliver called out.

“Dada!”

“Dada is coming back,” Felicity told Tommy while Oliver was getting up from the ground. “He is just helping Emmy, Deepa and William with something.”

“Dada!” Tommy called out again, immediately following his dad.

Quickly Felicity got up from the ground and ran to catch up on Tommy. She took his hand and kept him from following Oliver into the water. Instead she crouched down behind him and pulled his back against her chest.

“See? Daddy is helping, so Deepa gets her bracelet back,” she explained to Tommy, pointing at where Emmy was standing and comforting her friend, who cried about the loss of her bracelet while Oliver and William were looking for it.

“I will go over there and look there,” Oliver stated, pointing at a place a little closer to the riverside where the girls had been playing before.

“Be careful,” William told him. “There’s a lot of mud. It makes the stones slippery.”

“Thanks,” Oliver said while already walking through the small stream closer to where Tommy and Felicity were standing. “Hon, could you take my wedding band? I don’t want to risk losing it.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied, letting go of Tommy’s hand to get closer to the stream.

She had her hand already reached out to take the ring when Oliver lifted his left hand to his lips. He pressed a kiss to the metal on his ring finger before taking it off and handing it to Felicity. She was too surprised by the gesture she had never seen before to ask right away, and Oliver had already turned his attention back to the search of the bracelet.

Felicity formed her hand to a fist around his wedding band, holding it in a tight grip to make sure she wouldn’t lose it, making a mental note to ask him about the kiss. How come she had never seen him doing that before though they had been married for almost five years now?

“Mama!” Tommy said, calling for her attention by tugging at her hand. He pointed his finger at the ground in front of them.

“Yes, there’s a flower,” Felicity commented.

“Stone!”

“No, that’s not a stone,” she told him. “It’s a flower. See?”

Felicity picked the daisy and moved the blossom over Tommy’s face. He giggled, trying to hide his face against her chest to make the tickling stop.

It wasn’t long until Oliver called out, “I got the bracelet.”

He quickly went over to the kids and helped Deepa to put the bracelet back on. She thanked him, smiling over her entire face about the jewelry being found again. As quickly as the worry about it being lost had come, as quickly it seemed to disappear now. Only a minute after Oliver had handed her the bracelet, she was already playing with Emmy again.

While Oliver came walking back to the riverside, Tommy tried to get Felicity to walk with him into the stream.

“No, no, Tommy,” Felicity told him. “We will stay here over here.”

Tommy released a low cry, obviously not being happy about his mother’s decision.

“Tommy can come and play with us, Felicity,” Deepa called over.

“Oh, I am not sure if Tommy-“

“I would take care of him,” William added.

He looked at her with hopeful eyes, so Felicity nodded and gestured with her hand for Oliver to hand Tommy over to William. She knew how much it meant to William that they trusted him with his little siblings, and they did trust him with them. William was great with Emmy and Tommy. Emmy loved him as much as she loved Tommy, and Tommy loved having a big brother who made it possible for him to explore things when his parents weren’t around and his sister couldn’t help him.

Oliver handed Tommy over to William, who took his little brother back to the girls. Tommy was smiling all over his face, proud and happy to be in the stream with his siblings. He crouched down, playing with the stones on the ground of the stream. Felicity couldn’t hold back the smile that formed on her face when she saw Tommy handing William a stone. She was sure he would make Emmy and Deepa take a stone with them, too, and-

“Earth to Felicity,” Oliver said, waving his hand in front of her eyes.

“What?” Felicity asked, flinching slightly.

Oliver chuckled and pecked her lips shortly before he held out his left hand.

“What-?”

“My ring,” Oliver told her before she could ask.

“Oh,” Felicity made, chuckling slightly. “Yes, of course.”

Instead of just giving him the ring, though, Felicity turned his hand and pushed the ring onto his finger. She lifted his hand to her lips, kissing the ring, like he had done before he had taken it away. She kept her eyes locked on Oliver’s while she was doing so and hence didn’t miss the slightly embarrassed expression on his face as he recognized the gesture.

“Let’s sit down here,” Oliver suggested, gesturing at the grass beneath them.

They sat down side by side. Oliver leaned back, propping his upper body up on his forearms behind him, so he could keep his eyes on the playing kids. Felicity rolled onto her stomach, putting one arm on Oliver’s stomach and resting her chin on his shoulder to look at him. Oliver’s hand rubbed up and down Felicity’s back gently. He didn’t say a word, and Felicity was almost willing to forget her question about the gesture if he didn’t want to talk about it. Her nosiness was driving her too crazy, though.

“What was that?” Felicity asked him.

“What was what?” Oliver asked, not stopping to run his fingers over her back or watch the kids playing in the stream.

“You know what I mean,” Felicity whispered back. “What was that gesture? You kissed the ring before you took it off.”

Oliver just shrugged his shoulders, not answering. His face didn’t show any reaction, almost like he hadn’t heard her question. It was unusual for Oliver to act like that, and it made Felicity frown.

“Hon?”

Slowly Oliver’s hand came to rest against her lower back. His fingers were spread out on her skin under her shirt. Sighing, he turned his head and pressed a kiss to her forehead. When he pulled back, he didn’t turn his gaze back to the kids, though, but kept his eyes on Felicity instead.

“You know, I always take the ring off before I head out on the streets,” Oliver said, “and I always take it with me on a necklace because… well, because it’s part of me, and I feel better when I have it with me.”

Felicity didn’t say a word. She just smiled. She knew about all of that. She had watched Oliver taking the ring off and putting it to the necklace uncountable times already. Though she had been managing a lot of things from home with the kids being so young, there had always been times when she had been with him in the lair.

“And before I actually get out, you know, I always come to the workstation to get a kiss as lucky charm. Well, and when you’re not with me in the lair, you give me that kiss before I leave our home.”

Again Felicity nodded. They still did that. She knew that every time he left the house to go on a mission it could be the last time she saw him in one piece. She tried not to think about it too much, especially because she knew that Oliver was a good fighter, he had the team as back-up and barely anything serious ever happened to him or anyone else but the criminals. His worst wounds were usually a few bruises or cuts, maybe a few broken ribs every once in awhile. Yet she knew it could be different if something went wrong.

“I need this kiss before I head out in the field,” Oliver explained after a long moment of silence. “I know it’s… stupid in a way, but this kiss always reminds me of what I have to lose when I am out there and…”

He shrugged his shoulders, lowering his gaze for a moment. Felicity rubbed her hand over his stomach comfortingly, watching him.

“It’s not stupid,” Felicity whispered when he looked back up at her. “We all need a reminder of what we have in our lives from time to time. I need that kiss too, so I am reminded of why I need to be on my A game whenever I am helping you. But why kissing the ring?”

Oliver took in a deep breath before he answered, “Because of the pregnancy depression. You… well, there weren’t any kisses and I needed to find a way to compensate that lack. When I was about to go into the field without a kiss for the first time, I had trouble taking the ring off because it… I don’t know… It was the compensatory reminder for what I have to lose, but I couldn’t keep it on because of the gloves, and… somehow I ended up kissing it before taking it off. I couldn’t kiss you, but kissing the symbol of what we have was a good way to make up for that. Somehow it just turned into a new habit. Whenever I take the ring off, I kiss it before doing so.”

He shrugged his shoulders with an almost shy smile, turning his gaze back to the kids.

“Why did you never tell me about that?” Felicity asked.

Again Oliver shrugged his shoulders, looking back at her. “I don’t know. I didn’t think this was a big thing for you, but if you feel I should have told you, I am sorry for-“

“No, no,” Felicity interrupted him. “I am not mad or anything. I am just… I don’t know… I just wonder why I don’t know about this because this is more than a habit. It’s a ritual.”

“I think there was just never the time. It would have been weird if I just came home and told you that I started kissing my wedding band because I couldn’t kiss you. How should I have just told you that?”

Felicity nodded. “Yeah, there is probably never the right time for something like that.”

Oliver leaned forward and pecked her lips gently. “At least now you know.”

“Now I know,” Felicity said with a sigh, snuggling her cheek to Oliver’s shoulder and watching their kids. Oliver’s hand moved from her lower back to the back of her head, his fingers combing through her hair. “I’m still scared, you know?”

“Scared of what?”

“A pregnancy depression,” Felicity whispered back, tightening her hand to a fist in the fabric of Oliver’s shirt. “That time… I never felt so lost and…”

“I know,” Oliver whispered back and kissed her forehead. “It’s nothing you have to worry about unless you are really ready to take that step, though. And if you are never ready, that is fine, too.”

Felicity nodded, sighing quietly. Oliver had told her this once before already, and she knew that he meant it. He wouldn’t talk her into having another child if she wasn’t ready. He had always let her know that if she didn’t want more babies after what had happened during the pregnancy with Tommy or because of any other reason that was okay for him.

“There is no need to decide this now,” Oliver continued after a moment. “We still have time to think about this. There is no rush.”

Felicity chuckled. “You do know that you will turn 37 this year, right?”

“So?” He gasped for breath dramatically. “You don’t want to tell me that I am getting old, right?”

Again Felicity chuckled. “I would never dare to say something so terrible.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You better don’t.”


	149. Big news

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, guys! I am being nice here and warn you: Don’t get your hopes up. It’s not that THAT big news.

Felicity watched her mother with slightly narrowed eyes, following each of her movements. She was sitting on the floor, playing with Tommy and Emmy almost innocently, but Felicity wouldn’t let herself be fooled.

“What are you thinking about so intensely?” Oliver whispered into her ear, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and snuggling his cheek to hers. “And why are you staring at your mother like that?”

“She’s planning something,” Felicity replied, leaning back against Oliver. “She didn’t just invite us over for dinner. There is something more going on here.”

“Because your mother can’t invite Laurel and us over to dinner when she comes here all the way from Las Vegas to visit her boyfriend?” Oliver asked back.

He lowered his lips to the side of her neck, gently brushing his lips against her pulse point. Felicity let her head fall back against his shoulder, not allowing her eyes to turn away from her mother, though.

“Of course she can,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes, “but she didn’t. She didn’t just come here to visit Quentin and invite us to an intimate family dinner.”

“I think you’re being paranoid,” Oliver whispered with a chuckle. “She probably just wanted to use the weekend to see all of us after she didn’t make it here for Christmas or Emmy’s birthday. It’s been awhile since we’ve last seen her.”

“I am still sure there is something more going on,” Felicity replied. She turned her head to look at Oliver and pecked his lips shortly. “Nothing you can say will convince me otherwise until we left this apartment.”

Oliver chuckled. “And I love you even more for that.”

Felicity moved her hands along Oliver’s forearms over her stomach. She kept watching her mother. She was her usual smiley self, entertaining the kids by making faces at them and tickling them. Donna was always like that when she was around her grandchildren, so it shouldn’t be anything to waste a thought on.

Felicity still couldn’t get rid of the feeling that something was going on here, though. She couldn’t say what had caused this feeling. She couldn’t say when it had started. She just had this slight gut feeling that this was more than just a casual family dinner.

“Dinner’s ready!” Laurel called when she stepped out of the kitchen where she had been helping her father to prepare the meal.

“I wanna sit next to granny!” Emmy stated immediately, getting up from the floor and running towards the table.

“Don’t you want to sit next to daddy?” Oliver asked. He quickly pecked Felicity’s cheek before letting go of her waist. He grabbed her hand instead and pulled her with him when he followed Emmy to the table.

The little girl had already sat down on one chair with her legs bent beneath her body, so she could sit on her heels. She smiled at her granny, patting the chair next to her to make Donna know where she wanted her to sit. When her parents approached, she quickly patted the other chair next to her, too. “You can sit here, daddy.”

“And what about mommy?” Oliver asked.

“Mommy,” Felicity answered, “needs to help Tommy with his dinner anyway and will just sit down at the other side of the table.”

When Donna approached, she handed Tommy over to Felicity, who sat him down in the high chair. The kids had spent so much time here in Quentin’s apartment already that he had started buying the basic furniture over the years.

“That smells delicious,” Donna stated when Quentin served the chicken. “Is that a new recipe?”

“Yes, Laurel found it on the internet, and we decided to try it today,” Quentin answered.

“He won’t let me cook alone,” Laurel explained, sitting down at the table next to Tommy.

“Mama’s not allowed to bake without daddy,” Emmy explained. “Daddy never lets her help, though.”

Everyone chuckled, while Felicity just rolled her eyes. She really wasn’t the least talented person in the kitchen. Oliver just always tried to make it look that way because she might have made a few mistakes when she had baked before.

“Oh, Felicity, you don’t have any wine,” Laurel noticed. “Should I-“

“No, I will drive back home later,” Felicity explained. “I’m fine with the water. Thanks.”

Felicity didn’t miss the way Donna and Quentin looked at each other with a meaningful expression in their eyes, having a wordless conversation. Felicity looked at Oliver, noticing that he hadn’t missed this, either.

“Okay, before we start with the dinner,” Quentin said, “Donna and I have an announcement to make.”

“Oh my god,” Felicity muttered under her breath.

She had known it. She had known this wasn’t just a casual family dinner but something more.

“Since we’ve been together for awhile now, and all my family is here in Starling anyway,” Donna explained, “Quentin and I decided that it is time to take the next step and move in together.”

“Wow, that are great news,” Laurel said. “I am happy for the two of you.”

“Thank you so much, Laurel,” Quentin replied with a smile. “Donna and I discussed this for awhile now, and we think that it is about time.”

“I can only agree with Laurel,” Oliver said. “That really is good news.”

“Well, I can guarantee that I am always here as a babysitter,” Donna explained. She leaned down to Emmy. “You would like a pajama party with granny, right?”

“Yes!” Emmy said excitedly. “But we need to watch movies all night and eat a lot of sweets.”

“What’s a pajama party without movies or sweets?” Donna asked with a chuckle.

“Did you already plan when you will move here?” Laurel asked.

“I will stay here in Starling until Sunday,” Donna explained. “As soon as I am back in Vegas I will start arranging things.”

“If you need any help, just say so,” Oliver offered.

“I took a few days off work to help her,” Quentin explained.

Felicity didn’t listen anymore. Her mother was moving to Starling. That was big news like really big news actually. Felicity just needed to find out if it was good or bad news now. She loved her mom, and they had a so much better relationship than they had had when she had been younger and had still lived in Vegas with her. She didn’t want their relationship to change to the worse again because they spent too much time together and-

“Mama!” Tommy called for Felicity’s attention.

She turned around to her son, seeing him pointing at the food.

“Tommy is right,” Quentin said. “We should better start dinner before it will get cold.”

 

 

Felicity closed the door behind her and quickly tiptoed towards the bed. She hadn’t completely slipped under the blanket yet when Oliver was already pulling her against him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and snuggled his cheek to hers, pressing a kiss to the juncture of her neck and shoulder.

“Tommy didn’t even wake up when I changed his diaper,” she whispered into the dark, feeling that Oliver expected her to say something. “I don’t think I have ever seen him that tired.”

Both kids had fallen asleep in the car on their way back home. Oliver had carried Emmy upstairs and put her to her bed while Felicity had done the same for Tommy. It had been an amusing even if long evening. It had been great to spend time with her mom again. The last time she had seen her in Vegas months ago had been a short visit that hadn’t let much time for fun.

“Is everything alright?” Oliver asked. “You’ve barely said a word since dinner.”

“I’m thinking,” Felicity replied.

“About your mother moving here?”

“Yeah…”

Oliver tightened his arms around her and gently kissed her earlobe before he asked, “You’re not looking forwards to that?”

“I love my mom. I just-“

Felicity took in a deep breath, snuggling closer to Oliver, before breathing out with a sigh. She turned her head, so her nose was pressed against his shoulder and breathed him in. He pressed a reassuring kiss to the back of her head, not saying anything. She knew he didn’t want to urge her to talk if she wasn’t ready yet.

Sighing, Felicity turned in his arms, so her chest was pressed to his. She moved her hands to his cheeks framing his face. She could only see the outlines of his body in the dark, so she moved her fingertips over his face instead.

“I’m just scared she and I will start to annoy each other and our relationship will suffer from that,” Felicity whispered. “I don’t want my relationship to my mom to fall apart again. Do you understand that?”

“Yeah, of course,” Oliver whispered back. He angled his head, resting his forehead against hers, and tightened his arms around her waist. “I don’t think you need to worry about that, though. Donna and you get along with each other so much better now, and I think it is not only because you barely spend time with each other. The both of you are completely different people now, and you have built a completely new relationship.”

“So you think I shouldn’t worry?”

“Exactly,” Oliver replied. “Look, you even flew to Vegas to talk to her when you felt you couldn’t talk to me. Years ago you wouldn’t have done that.”

Felicity sighed, nuzzling his nose with hers. “You would like to have her here, right?”

“Of course I would. We barely have any blood family left. Our children only have that one grandmother. And actually Donna is like a mother to me,” Oliver explained. “So if she starts to annoy you, I am willing to bear all her attention.”

Felicity chuckled. “So you think dividing my mother’s love will help to make sure our relationship won’t be overwhelmed with the challenge of living in the same city or would selflessly take the burden of getting her attention?”

“Absolutely. Or actually… No… No, I just think that it’s mothers and their boys, so I guess she loves me more than you already anyway.”

“You’re impossible,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, playfully slapping his shoulder.

“Besides,” Oliver added, rolling around, so he was lying on top of Felicity, “she said she would babysit. And you know how much fun days and nights without babies can be.”

“What is that about you being so insatiable lately?” Felicity asked with a chuckle while Oliver was already kissing his way down her neck.

“What? I can’t adore my wife’s body?” he asked back, his lips still against her skin.

“Oh, you can adore my body as much as you want, but lately it seems all your thoughts, or at least a lot of them, revolve around sex.”

“You think?”

“I got a feeling, yes.”

Oliver chuckled against her skin and rested his chin on her stomach, looking up at her. She still couldn’t see him, but she could feel his gaze on her skin. She was sure that even in the darkness she blushed.

“Do you want to complain?”

“Not if your lips continue their way down there.”

“Oh, I would never disappoint you about that,” he assured before indeed moving further down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please also read [this announcement](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/149419567750/short-announcements) for what to expect on Friday.   
> Side note: There is no beta needed anymore. I found one already!


	150. The redo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short reminder: Olicity's first time was not in Nanda Parbat (check chapter 7 in case you are interested).

“Your last wish?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow and turning the unopened envelope in her hand. “Are you sure you made the right choice?”

“Absolutely,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “That is what I want.”

“It’s a shame it will be over then,” Felicity said with a sigh. “This was fun.”

“It was,” Oliver confirmed. “Since I will have to use that last envelope eventually, though, I feel now is the right time.”

Felicity nodded slowly, turning the envelope in her hands. “I guess it’s time to see what you have in mind then, right?”

“Right.”

Felicity quickly opened the envelope and pulled out the card in it to read about Oliver’s fifth sex wish. As soon as her eyes had reached the end of the line, she perked up an eyebrow while looking at him.

“Really?”

Oliver chuckled. “Why so doubtful? It’s going to be fun. Oh, and I count the talk we had before the sex as foreplay, so no skipping that.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrow even a little bit more. “I am not sure you really thought that wish through.”

“Oh, really? How come?”

“Well, the first thing would be the location,” Felicity explained. “What do you think I am supposed to say to Thea and Roy? ‘I am sorry, but you have to leave your penthouse for a night because my husband wants to redo our first night together and we need your penthouse for that?’”

Oliver chuckled. “Hey, you said you will arrange things. I am sure you will find a way.”

“Okay, then the next things. Five rounds in less than twelve hours? Really?”

“Are you doubting my stamina?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied without hesitation. “Oliver, it’s been six years since our first night together, and you have been very sex deprived back then. That’s different now.”

“Oh, trust me, I can satisfy you five times a night.”

“I don’t doubt that. I just doubt that you can get it up five times a night.”

“Well, I can promise that I am in best form,” Oliver explained. “I think you should know that after this morning and last night and-“

“Got it,” Felicity interrupted him before he could continue to list all the times they had had sex lately.

It would be a long list because they had a lot of sex. She knew about the seven-year itch. Maybe she should check if there was something like a five-year something because their fifth year of marriage had been full of sex. She just hoped that wouldn’t change after their anniversary next week that would be the start of their sixth year.

“Anything more?” Oliver asked.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, clearing her throat quietly. She tried to figure out how to say the last and probably most important thing that made her doubt that Oliver had really thought that idea through. She had a really vivid memory of their first night together, but she was sure that Oliver was in denial about one detail of it. He cocked his head, waiting for her answer.

“Well, uhm… You might remember that I was a little unfocussed at the beginning of our first night together?” Felicity asked, waiting for the penny to drop, but Oliver just looked at her in question. Felicity cleared her throat, whispering, “So much better than with Ray?”

Felicity could literally see the second the memory came back to Oliver. Back when she had knocked at the door of the penthouse and declared that she wouldn’t let him push her away any longer because they loved each other and should be together no matter the dangers of their secret night time job, she had just broken up with Ray. The situation had been a slight mess though at the end that mess of going from one relationship to the other had actually cleared the mess that had been created by everything that had happened before.

Anyway, finally falling into Oliver’s arms like she had wanted to do for months already had made her reflect about her relationship with Ray. Given that not talking had never been her strength, it had ended with her babbling out her thoughts despite the terrible timing. She couldn’t really picture Oliver wanting a redo of that.

“Let’s skip that part and just do a redo of the rest?” Oliver suggested.

Felicity chuckled. Getting up, she pecked his lips. “I’ll see what I can do.”

 

 

Felicity still had no idea how she had managed to convince Thea to actually leave the penthouse to her for the night. She was sure that her sister-in-law new exactly that Felicity had borrowed it for reasons. Why else would she have insisted on having the penthouse cleaned from the floors to the ceiling?

Well, luckily that and the promise to get to babysit the kids had been Thea’s only demands. Felicity had the slight feeling that Thea might actually have sex with Roy in the guestroom in of her home as a way of evening things out. At least that way they all had their fun.

Pushing every thought of Thea and everything else aside, Felicity lifted her hand and knocked at the door of the penthouse just like she had done around six years ago. She remembered how nervous she had been though she had been quite good at hiding that behind her anger.

When the door opened, Oliver gave her a quick look. “Felicity, what-?”

Just like it had been the first time six years ago Felicity walked past him into the penthouse. She hurried into the middle of the spacious room before she turned around. While Oliver was closing the door and slowly turning around to her, Felicity crossed her arms in front of her chest.

Oliver looked slightly confused. Felicity was sure that he had put just as much thought into remembering as many details of this night as she had done. If they were doing a redo, they would do it right. It was almost ridiculous how much effort they were willing and able to raise just for a little sex, right?

“What-?” Oliver started once more, but Felicity lifted her right hand, gesturing for him to just be quiet.

She had tried to remember the exact words she had used six years back, but she wasn’t sure if she could remember correctly. She had written down a few alternatives that had come to her mind to try figuring out which was the right one. She wasn’t sure if she had decided for the exact word she had said back then, but it didn’t matter too much anyway. She didn’t need to really convince Oliver to be with her, so she didn’t need the perfect words. Close to perfect would do it here, too.

“The two of us,” Felicity began with strained, gesturing between them, “you and me, we are together.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow, giving her a quick look over. He had told her once that his first thought had been that she was drunk. Given her messy appearance and slightly off the rails behavior that night she couldn’t blame him.

“Pardon?” he finally asked.

“You and me are together,” Felicity repeated, gesturing between the two of them once more.

“Felici-“

“No,” she interrupted him with firm voice, shaking her head. “We are together despite what you might think about whether we are or even should be. I know our lives are dangerous, but I don’t care.”

“Felicity, you-“

“No,” she said once more, now almost shouting it.

She remembered how her thoughts had started spinning in that moment. _What if she was making a fool of herself right now? What if Oliver was only going to turn her down once more? What if after this they wouldn’t be able to work together anymore? What if-_

Felicity concentrated back on the moment right now. She focused back on Oliver, who seemed to be quite amused about this, and she had to bite the inside of her own cheek to stop herself from grinning, too.

“We are together,” Felicity said once more. “You told me you love me, and I think we both know that I love you. So you will just get over your doubts and over whatever keeps you from being with me because I say so.”

Felicity looked at Oliver, waiting for him to say something. He was smiling which he definitely hadn’t done the first time they had stood here and had this talk. He was actually trying to hide it now, probably knowing that he hadn’t done it six years ago. He failed to stop smiling, though.

“You love me,” Oliver more repeated than asked.

“I do,” Felicity confirmed.

She just wondered if he was going to ask her about Ray because she remembered his objection that she was with him now. She received her answer when Oliver just asked, “You really love me?”

Felicity nodded, smiling at him. “I really love you.”

Oliver just kept smiling at her. He didn’t move to just cross the distance to her as soon as possible like he had done all those years ago. Instead he stayed where he was to just smile at her and take her in.

This was more than just a redo of their first night together Felicity realized. She couldn’t really put it into words, but it seemed like this was like taking their first night and moving it to their present time at least regarding how much their feelings and their relationship had progressed since then.

Slowly Oliver crossed the distance to her, never breaking the eye contact. When he stood right in front of her, he framed her face with his hands and gently tugged some strand of hair behind her ears. When his hands rested back on her cheeks, he leaned down and kissed her gently.

Felicity melted against him immediately. When her hands came to grip the fabric of his henley, Oliver opened his lips to her. His tongue moved along the seam between her lips until she opened them to him. Their tongues met in a familiar dance they had been enjoying for years now. His teeth grazed her bottom lip, scratching gently over it.

It wasn’t until her lungs were burning with the need for air that Oliver broke the kiss. He didn’t stop kissing her, though. Just like he had done six years ago, he was kissing down the side of her neck instead. His lips sucked at her pulse point firmly, certainly leaving a mark. She knew how much he loved that. Even now that they were married and she was wearing her wedding band every second of every day, he just loved leaving a mark on her skin every once in a while. Felicity was the last to blame him for that. It worked the other way around, too.

“This feels great,” Felicity whispered, moving her fingers through the short hair at the back of his neck. Oliver tightened his arms around her, pulling her as close as possible to him. His lips kept sucking at her neck, so Felicity asked, “Did you imagine it like this? This redo?”

Oliver hummed against her skin. “It’s perfect. You’ve been angrier the first time around, though.”

“You’ve been grumpier.”

Oliver chuckled against her lips. “Well, we both changed, didn’t we?”

“Oh yes, we did.”

Felicity moved her hands over Oliver’s back under the fabric of his henley, exploring the play of his muscles. She closed her eyes, trying to remember how it had felt like when she had touched him the first time. She had memorized his body so long ago, though. She couldn’t remember how it had been before that.

Remembering that she had been the first one to start the undressing, she pulled Oliver’s shirt up his body. Oliver pulled away enough to let her tug the shirt up his body as far as she could reach. He quickly pulled it over his head the rest of the way and let the fabric fall down to the floor.

Felicity knew that she had stared at him for almost a minute when he had took off his shirt the first time, but she didn’t need to look at him now because she knew every inch of his body anyway. So she moved her hands to his hips and pulled him back against her instead. She pressed her lips to his, but didn’t stay long there. Instead she slowly moved her lips down his neck like he had done for her before.

She had just reached his pulse point when Oliver bent down and put his hands to the back of Felicity’s knees. He lifted her against him easily like she weighed nothing. Felicity wrapped her legs around his waist in response, pressing herself to him as close as possible. It had felt natural the first time they had done it, and it only felt even more natural now.

Oliver slowly started moving them to his former bedroom that was now used as a spare bedroom. Felicity leaned back enough, so she could look at Oliver. She watched his face, smiling about the unburdened expression of love and joy in his eyes. Her hands kept moving over his shoulder and neck.

“This is different than our first time.”

“We’ve been through a lot since then,” Oliver replied. “We really got to know each other. We have been through some ups and downs. We had two perfect children.”

“Three actually,” Felicity corrected him. “We have William.”

Oliver smiled. “I am so glad you can accept him.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “He is your son. Of course I accept him.”

“I don’t think every wife would have seen it that way.”

“Well, I am not every wife.”

Oliver’s smile widened. “No, you are absolutely not. You are the best.”

“Of course I am. I hope you didn’t discover that only now.”

“No, I didn’t,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, opening the door to the bedroom. “I noticed a while ago.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied. “I think it was somewhere between ‘I now pronounce you husband and wife’ and ‘You may kiss the bride’.”

Felicity chuckled. “Very sweet, Mr. Queen.”

Oliver lowered Felicity onto the bed, and she lay back on the mattress. She watched him standing at the bed and taking in her appearance like he had just seen her the first time. Felicity felt her skin starting to tingle at the way he looked at her. Not breaking their eye contact, Oliver crawled onto the mattress, so he was hovering over her. He kept his weight away from her body, but he lowered his head and kissed her.

Felicity was surprised that this didn’t feel forced at all. She hadn’t expected this to feel forced in any brutal way, but she had thought it would feel forced to go through everything they had done six years ago. It didn’t. Maybe it was because they were changing some details to make this fit their new situation. They weren’t working through a plan. Or maybe it was because deep down in a lot of ways they were still the same people who were crazy about each other like they had been six years ago. Felicity didn’t know.

“I dreamed about this a lot in the last years,” Felicity whispered when Oliver moved his lips down he neck. “This was a memorable night the first time.”

“It will be another memorable night tonight,” Oliver replied against her skin. “I can feel it.”

“Well, well, Mr. Queen,” Felicity said. “I think it is time to go back to our plan, right?”

“Our plan?”

“Hmhmm,” Felicity hummed in agreement, taking her ponytail and pulling it aside. “It’s time for you to open my dress.”

Smiling, Oliver did as she had suggested. He slowly lowered the zipper of the dress before he started moving the hem of her dress up her body, sliding his fingertips over her skin while he did so. He pulled the fabric over her head and dropping it on the floor. Felicity meanwhile pulled the tie from her hair, so her blonde locks were falling over her shoulders.

“Nice lingerie.”

“Thanks. It’s new.”

Oliver wanted to kiss her again, but Felicity quickly put her hand to his lips and whispered, “I am still wearing my shoes.”

“So?”

“I didn’t wear them six years ago. You have to take them off.”

“Well, if you say so, Mrs. Queen,” Oliver replied.

He slid down the bed a little bit and dipped his tongue into her belly button for a second before he kissed down her left leg. Sitting up on his heels, he lifted her left foot onto his shoulder and opened the shoe. As soon as he took it off, he let it fall to the floor like he had done with her dress before and continued with the shoe on her right foot.

He moved back up her body with his lips on her skin. Felicity hummed, arching her back slightly. When he reached her jaw, his hands moved to her glasses and carefully took them off her. Felicity watched his strong arm reaching out to put her glasses on the nightstand. When Oliver turned back to her, he was still propped up onto his forearms with his legs lying between hers.

“Don’t you want to come closer?” Felicity asked.

Oliver smiled, lowering his body onto hers completely. His naked skin pressed to her naked skin. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, fully enjoying that contact. No matter how often they had seen each other naked or felt the other’s skin pressing against theirs, it never failed to make her feel as turned on as the first time.

Slowly Oliver’s hands moved from her ribcage down her body to her hips and over her lower stomach to her center. He pushed the fabric of her lace panties aside and started stroking her folds. Felicity moaned, gripping his wrist and holding his hand down there.

His fingertips felt rough on her delicate skin, but they slid back and forth between her folds perfectly. She was wet already, making it easy for Oliver’s fingers to pleasure her. They gently played at her entrance. His finger tips dipped into her wet channel before moving out and sliding back between her folds to her clit.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered his name, feeling the heat coiling in her stomach already.

“Do you want to say something?” Oliver asked, leaning down to kiss her. His fingers meanwhile moved back lower and lower until they reached her entrance again. He slid to fingers inside of her before she could answer. “Fe-li-ci-ty.”

“Just don’t stop,” Felicity said with gritted teeth. “I love you so much.”

Her hips were moving against his fingers quickly. His fingers were sliding into her deeper, reaching spots they hadn’t been able to reach without the movements of her hips. Felicity moaned, closing her eyes and enjoying the feeling of his fingers inside of her.

“Say it again,” Oliver whispered, lowering his head to kiss her neck once more. “Say it again, Felicity.”

“I love you.”

“Again please.”

“I love you, Oliver. I love you so, so, so much.”

The heat in the pit of her stomach was almost unbearable now. Her hips were moving against his fingers relentlessly. Her free hand had fisted into the sheet of the bed, while the other tightened around Oliver’s wrist.

“I love you, Oliver,” Felicity said with a moan. “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

Finally he moved his thumb over her clit, and her inner walls tightened around his fingers, keeping them in a tight grip. Felicity’s back arched even more while the pleasure was washing over her. Long moans were escaping her lips, filling the room.

Felicity opened her eyes, finding Oliver smiling at her smugly. He pulled his fingers from her center, lifting them to his mouth and appreciatively licked them dry.

“Your fingers never fail to amaze me,” Felicity explained.

Oliver chuckled. “Well, if that is how you feel about my fingers, I am more than intrigued to find out how you feel the rest of my body because we just started.”

Felicity grinned. “Oh, I know. We are still at the warm-up of round one of five.”

“You still think I can’t do it, right?”

“Hey, you have all freedom to prove me wrong,” Felicity replied with a grin.

She sat up and pressed her lips to Oliver’s in a gentle kiss. He responded to it immediately and was about to push her back onto the mattress, but Felicity lifted her right leg and wrapped it around his hip. Oliver got the hint and turned around, so he was sitting on the bed with Felicity in his lap. She rubbed herself against his jeans, and they both moaned at the delicious friction it caused.

Felicity kissed his forehead before dropping a series of short, gentle kisses down the side of his face to his cheek. His stubble tickled her lips, scratching her sensitive skin perfectly. Oliver’s hands meanwhile roamed over her back to the clasp of her bra. He opened it and took the fabric off her. Immediately his hands started discovering the newly exposed skin. The palms of his hands rubbed over his nipples, and they hardened under his caress.

“Oh, god,” Felicity moaned in pleasure.

Her head dropped back on the pillow, and Oliver used the opportunity to slide his lips from her throat down her body between her breasts. His stubble scratched over her skin. It felt rough and soft at the same time. His lower half rubbed against her. Felicity moaned at the way his erection pressed exactly where she craved some friction.

Felicity moved her hands down his chest over the scarred skin to his pants. She unbuttoned them, opened the zipper and moved her hand into his boxer briefs without any hesitation. He was hot and hard in her hand when Felicity started stroking him.

“God, Felicity,” Oliver panted against the side of her breast.

He tugged at a few strands of her blonde hair, so Felicity leaned down. Their lips met in a slow kiss, but the desperation and heat quickly increased. Felicity felt her pleasure coiling up in the pit of her stomach.

“Oliver,” she whispered against his lips.

He didn’t fail to know what she meant. With one quick movement he ripped her panties apart. Felicity leaned back in his arms, trying to look him up with a strict gaze, but she wasn’t able to hide her slight amusement.

“You can’t be nice, can you?”

Oliver chuckled. “I can be nice, but I don’t always want to be. Besides, a redo of this night includes ripping your panties off you.”

Felicity pumped his cock in response, brushing her lips against his. Oliver moaned, dropping his head back a little, and Felicity moved her lips over his stubble to his ear.

“Take off your pants and boxer briefs,” she whispered.

“As you wish,” he whispered, turning them back around, so he could gently lay her down on the mattress. He brushed his lips against hers for a short second before be climbed out of bed and quickly got rid of his pants and underwear.

Felicity reached out a hand for him, and Oliver didn’t hesitate to take her invitation. He put his hand into her welcoming fingers and climbed back into bed. He was hovering above her small body without touching her. Felicity licked her lips, enjoying the anticipation. She knew how his warm body felt pressed and moving against hers. She knew how it felt having him inside of her. And knowing that she was going to rediscover that feeling soon made her moved her hips in expectation.

“You know, now would probably be the time to ask if Thea’s home,” Felicity said with a chuckle.

“She’s not here,” Oliver whispered with a chuckle of his own. “Ready to continue?”

Felicity nodded, and immediately Oliver lowered his naked body onto hers. She arched her back, making his naked erection slide between her wet folds. Oliver moved his hands from her waist down to her hips and between their body, positioning him at her entrance. She arched her back a little more in response.

“Oliver,” Felicity gasped, grabbing his shoulders firmly. Her nails were digging into his skin, holding onto him. “Please.”

Just like in their first night together already Oliver followed her request without any hesitation. He moved his hips forward, so he sunk into her slowly. Felicity’s hold on his shoulders tightened, and her legs wrapped around his hips. He sunk into her deeply.

“It feels really good having you inside of me,” Felicity gasped.

Oliver chuckled against her jaw. “It’s still one of my favorite things you ever said to me.”

“I am not sure I said it our first night together, but I really should have because it does feel really good having you inside of me,” Felicity replied.

“Feels really good being inside of you, too.”

Felicity watched Oliver’s face closely. She loved watching him during sex. The way his eyes told her how much he adored and loved her always took her breath away. And seeing how he was growing closer and closer to his orgasm made Felicity almost crazy. It increased her own pleasure.

Oliver lowered his head. His lips weren’t touching hers, but their noses bumped against each other are when Oliver started thrusting. He set a firm but slow rhythm. Her legs tightened around his hips, her heels pressing into the skin of his butt to encourage him to keep going.

Felicity was panting. She could feel herself growing closer and closer to her orgasm. The feeling of Oliver stretching her inner falls made them pulsing around him. He slowed his thrusts down while simultaneously increasing the firmness of his thrusts. He pulled almost all the way back before thrusting back in. The movement made Felicity slide down the bed a little bit.

All he needed to do was to repeat the movement three times for Felicity to fall apart in his arms with a long moan. Her back arched even more into him, making him reach deeper. Her nails scratched down his back, certainly leaving marks.

When she slowly came down from her high, Oliver lowered his head to her chest, pressing his ear to her heart. Felicity was panting trying to catch her breath while she was still fluttering around Oliver’s hard cock inside of her.

“Oh my god,” she whispered between to gasps for breath. “This feels as amazing as it did the first time.”

Oliver pulled back a little to look at her. “We really cease in all these years, did we?”

“No, we didn’t,” Felicity replied.

She lifted her head from the pillow to kiss him. Oliver groaned into the kiss, taking her right hand and holing it to the mattress over her head. His hand tried to sneak between their bodies, but Felicity had other plans. She pressed her thigh to his hip, wordlessly asking him to turn around.

“You gotta turn on your back,” she whispered between his lips. “It’s still a redo of our first night together, remember?”

Groaning, Oliver wrapped an arm around her waist and turned them, so she was on top him. Putting her hands to his chest, she kept him down while she sat up in his lap. She just looked down at him. She looked down at this wonderful man she had shared years of her life with now and who she loved only more each day.

Slowly she started rocking back and forth on top of him. His cocked pressed against her heated channel perfectly, increasing her pleasure. She watched his face, seeing his lips pressing together firmly. His jaws were clenched and his breaths growing shorter. He was groaning. His hands were put to her hips, encouraging her movements on top of him while he was moving in synch with her, meeting each of her thrusts down with a thrust upwards of his own.

She could feel him growing desperately. His thrusts became quicker and harder. His hands didn’t just encourage her hips anymore, they pulled them down firmly. The sound of skin slapping against skin mixed with their moans.

When Felicity started clenching around him and her movements were losing rhythm, put his hands to the back of her knees and turned them. He was pounding into her with little rhythm, but it didn’t fail to make Felicity grow even closer to the edge until she finally was pushed over.

“Oliver,” she gasped, angling her hips to allow him to keep going, while her pleasure was washing over her.

Gently she stroked her hand over the back of his head, wordlessly telling him how much she loved him and how much she loved having sex with him. She lifted her head from the pillow and kissed him gently, framing his face with her hands.

It took Oliver three more hard thrusts to finally let go. He parted his lips from hers, groaning out her name while locking eyes with her. His hips slammed into her one last time before they came to a stop with his cock pulsing deep inside of her.

“God, Felicity,” he moaned, dropping all his weight on top of her.

They were both breathing heavily, trying to catch their breaths. Felicity’s forehead was resting against his, and she nuzzled his nose with hers. Oliver’s hands caressed her face gently, tugging some strands of hair behind her ear.

“I love you, Felicity,” he whispered.

Felicity leaned down, kissing him gently. Six years of being together and five years of marriage and she still couldn’t get enough of kissing him. She was just as in love with him as she had been six years ago, but she loved him even more than back then.

“I love you, too,” Oliver replied. “Happy anniversary.”

“Happy anniversary,” Felicity whispered back. “It’s been great five years, wasn’t it?”

Oliver nodded. “We have some tough times behind us.”

“But also a lot of good one,” Felicity reminded him, framing his face with her hands. “And we always made it through the tough ones. That is the only thing that matters.”

Oliver leaned down and pecked her lips gently. He pulled back enough to look at her and gently stroked his hand over her blonde hair. He watched her for a long moment like he was trying to find some answer to an unasked question in her face. Felicity was already about to ask him what was going on when Oliver cleared his throat.

“I was thinking about out little tradition to make the other vow one thing for our anniversary,” he began. “You’ve been so great to me this last year. You supported the situation with William. You organized all of this and the last four wishes. You’ve been amazing and the least I can do to thank you for that is to, instead of making you promise me to keep being as amazing as you already are or whatever, is to give you the chance to make me vow you two things.”

Felicity smiled. “That’s a great anniversary gift.”

“Thanks,” Oliver replied. “I thought five years called for something special, especially after everything that happened last year.”

Felicity lifted her head from the pillow and kissed him in silent gratitude. She moved her hands over his back, scratching his scarred skin gently. He purred like a cat, making Felicity chuckle. She knew how much into back scratched he was.

“So what do you want me to promise you?” Oliver asked.

“Well, the first one would be the one I have prepared for tonight,” Felicity explained, scratching the car on his lower back.

“So?”

“I want you to promise me that you will never, really never again doubt my faithfulness to you,” Felicity said. “I love you, Oliver. I love you and only you. I chose you over Ray years ago, and there wasn’t one day that I regretted that choice. You, Oliver Queen, will forever be the only man for me as long as I live.”

Oliver kissed the tip of her nose, nodding. His voice was slightly husky when he said, “Yes, of course. I promise to never doubt your faithfulness to me again. I am sor-“

Felicity put her fingers to his lips, shaking her head. “You apologized already, so no more apologizes needed.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied, taking in a deep breath. “And the second vow?”

Felicity sighed, trying to think about a second one. She bit down on her bottom lip and looked into Oliver’s face.

“You don’t have to decide this now. We still have a great night of sex ahead of us. I am sure you will find something that you want me to promise you.”

“Now that you reminded m of that, I think I know what I want to be promised,” Felicity said.

“Shoot.”

“Promise me that we will continue to have such hot, creative sex,” Felicity replied. “Because I love the sex we had in the last twelve months.”

“I promise that we will continue to have such hot, creative sex,” Oliver promised, sealing the vow with a kiss to her lips. “I hope you don’t think we had hot, creative sex only in the last twelve months.”

Felicity chuckled. “No, we’ve always been amazing in bed.”

“Or in the lair, in the kitchen, against a wall of a changing cabin,” Oliver added.

“Yes, we really have some chemistry.”

“Only some?”

“I think there were times that we had more chemistry,” she teased.

“Oh, really?”

Felicity nodded. “I am almost sure that I came four times in the first round of our first night together. You messed it all up. It’s completely ruined.”

“We can’t have that, right?” Oliver asked. “I guess I should make up for that.”

Oliver lowered his lips to her collar bone, nibbling gently, before he continued a way down her body.

“Oh, I am going to like the way you make up to me for this,” Felicity said, leaning back and enjoying Oliver’s caress. “You can gladly fail a few more times tonight.”

“Don’t get your hopes up, Felicity. I am in best form.”

“Less talking, more making up down the-“ Felicity started, but gasped when Oliver’s tongue moved over her clit.

Oh yes, this night was going to be more than memorable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 150 chapters in 1.5 years with 5 years of story told. Not bad, is it? :)
> 
> Thanks for everyone who ever supported this fic and made me continue this for so long. Check my tumblr blog for the blacked out chapter notes for the next 50 chapters. ;)


	151. Let me take care of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A great edit by [myshipperlife](http://myshipperlife.tumblr.com/post/149582160130/was-playing-around-with-manips-and-ended-up-with).

“I should have moved to Starling years ago,” Donna said with a sigh, stretching out her legs and resting her head back to enjoy the way the sun warmed her face. “Spending the afternoon with you, watching the kids and drinking champagne, is just so much nicer than anything Las Vegas was able to offer in the last years.”

Felicity chuckled slightly, emulating her mother’s deeds and closing her eyes to enjoy the sun. “Glad you feel that way.”

“You know, it really took me some time to accept Quentin’s offer to move in with him,” Donna said with a sigh. “I was worried about the two of us, hon. We didn’t always get along so well, and now that we do, I didn’t want to risk that. I thought it could harm our mother-daughter-relationship if we were too close. I didn’t want to risk that.”

Frowning, Felicity opened her eyes and turned towards her mother. Donna had her eyes still closed. She looked relaxed.

“I was worrying about the same thing to be honest,” Felicity replied after a moment. “We’re fine, though. Right?”

Donna opened her eyes and turned her face towards Felicity, smiling at her. She reached out a hand for her daughter, and once their fingers were linked, she said, “Of course we are fine.”

Felicity smiled in relief. Nothing would have been worse than if their relationship had suffered from her mother living in Starling now. It could get too much from time to time, but luckily Oliver always sensed when she felt that way and immediately intervened. He loved having Donna’s attention anyway.

When her phone beeped, Felicity let go of her mother’s hand and grabbed her phone.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Felicity.”

“John,” Felicity said, casually telling her mom who was interrupting their moment.

“Oh, let’s hope your husband didn’t gamble away the house,” Donna whispered.

Felicity needed the break of a second before she got what her mother was saying and quickly smiled at her. Since Donna still didn’t know about Team Arrow, they had told her that the men were playing poker.

“What’s going on?” Felicity asked John.

“Well, it seems like Oliver has a migraine. He is quite moody, and he is not any help at all. He refuses to go home, though. So I was wondering if you could-“

“I’m already on my way. Thanks for calling.”

“Sure.”

Donna perked up her eyebrows when Felicity quickly got up. “He didn’t gamble away the house, right?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “He has a migraine, so I am going to pick him up. Can you watch the kids?”

“Yes, sure. I’m just going to take all of them and buy them ice cream.”

“Yes, great. Do that,” Felicity replied, “but Deepa is lactose-intolerant and William is allergic to strawberries. Emmy and Tommy-“

“-are free of any allergies, but they hate banana ice cream,” Donna finished her daughter’s sentence with a smile. “I got this handled. Go and take care of your husband.”

“Thanks, mom,” Felicity replied.

She quickly kissed her mother’s cheek before she hurried towards the door.

 

 

“John, I told you I’m fine.”

Felicity was at the head of the metal stairs that led down to the lair in the basement of Verdant when she heard Oliver’s word. His voice sounded exhausted and tense, pressed out between gritted teeth. Felicity was glad John had called her. Oliver didn’t have migraine attacks often, but when he did, it was usually bad.

“And don’t call Felicity to pick me up or anything,” Oliver added after a while. “I am fine and we will continue with our plan. We head out as soon as the sun has gone down. I don’t need to go home, and Felicity will only be worried and drag me home to take care of me. There is no need for that, though. It’s just a little headache, so don’t call her.”

“Too late,” Felicity replied for John, starting to walk down the metal stairs towards them.

She saw Oliver sitting on her chair at the work station. He was pale and had dark rings under his eyes. He must be feeling miserable.

“Felicity, what-?”

“Thanks for calling, John,” Felicity interrupted him, smiling at their friend.

John got up from where he was leaning against one of the tables and walked towards her. He pressed a kiss to her temple and squeezed her hand before he said, “Take good care of him.”

“Always.”

While John was walking to the back of the lair to give the two some privacy Felicity went over to Oliver. He looked at her the entire time, breathing in and out evenly. She knew that he would try to convince her that he was fine and there was no need to go home, but she also knew that it would be a lie. He was not fine, and she wouldn’t let him stay here or even worse get out in the field when he was not okay.

“I’m-“

“-fine?” Felicity asked.

“Yeah,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “Just a little headache. It’s not that bad.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow and sat down on the edge of her workstation in front of him. Sighing, she framed his face with her hands. When she started to gently stroke her fingertips through his stubble, he leaned into her touch and closed his eyes. Felicity watched him wordlessly.

He was leaning more on her than ever. The times when he had shut her out of what he was feeling were over. She always was the first person he came to for advice or support because he knew Felicity would give him all she could give. The only time that he still didn’t open up to her and didn’t lean on her was when he felt it was such a minor thing that he would be able to get through it alone and there was no need to share it. Headaches were such a minor thing he thought he should be able to get through alone.

“Where are the kids?”

“My mom takes them to eat ice cream,” Felicity replied with whispered voice, knowing that loud noises would probably make his headache worse. “So it would be only the two of us at home. It would be only the two of us in a dark, quiet and cool room.”

With a low sigh he opened his eyes and looked at her blearily.

“Will you take me home and take care of me?”

Felicity smiled, leaning forward. Her lips brushed against his forehead and down his nose to his lips. She kissed him gently and smiled when he sighed against her lips quietly.

“Always.”

 

 

While Oliver was sitting on the bed and undressed himself, Felicity let down the shutters. The room was left in complete darkness. She left her shoes at the window when she tiptoed to the bed. Her eyes needed a moment to adjust before she could see Oliver lying in bed already.

Even in the darkness of the room she could see that he was miserable. His eyes were screwed shut, forming a deep frown on his forehead. His lips were slightly opened, and heavy breaths were escaping him. He was almost panting. Since they had left the lair he hadn’t said a word.

“Do you feel nauseated?” Felicity whispered as quietly as possible.

Oliver grumbled loudly and turned his head, so he was facing her. His eyes stayed closed and he had to gulp a few times before he could hum affirmatively.

“Do you want to lie down in the bathroom, so-“

Felicity stopped when Oliver reached out his hand for her.

“Come here. You promised cuddles,” he said with a groan.

“I don’t remember promising that,” Felicity whispered, but she was already taking his hand and let him pull her onto the mattress next to him. Oliver moved as close as possible, resting his head right under her breasts and wrapping his arms around her waist. Felicity spread her legs, so he was lying between them and she could press her thighs to his sides to spend a little more warmth. She gently cradled his head to her upper body. “You’re gonna be okay.”

Slowly her fingertips moved over his head, massaging his scalp. Oliver sighed, pressing his head closer to her. His breathing only calmed down slowly, but eventually the heavy pants turned into deep and even breaths.

Felicity kissed the crown of Oliver’s head in relief. She knew Oliver hated being sick. Unlike other men who suffered from a little cold like they had the Spanish flu Oliver just tried to get through it alone. He always felt like something like a little headache - even if it was a lot more than only that - was not something that was even worth mentioning. So he tried to get through it alone, suffered even more and became grumpy. He always let her take of him when she asked him about it, though.

After awhile Oliver started snoring softly, making Felicity smile. She doubted that she could love him any more than she did right now, but she was also sure that Oliver would prove her wrong of that sooner or later. He always did.

When the door opened and Donna appeared in the frame of it, Felicity’s fingers stopped moving. Immediately Oliver grumbled like he was about to wake up and he turned his head to the other side. Felicity put her fingers back to his head, beginning to massage his scalp and temples again. Oliver took in a deep breath before he breathed out with a sigh and fell back to sleep.

“Everything alright?” Donna asked in a whisper.

“He is going to be okay,” Felicity explained. “A few hours of sleep and he’s perfectly fine again. Could you stay and watch the kids?”

“Sure. Emmy wanted to come in, but I told her she should let Oliver sleep.”

“Thank you, mom.”

Donna smiled. “Of course. Is there anything the two of you need?”

“No, we are fine,” Felicity whispered and pressed a kiss to the crown of Oliver’s head. He looked a lot more relaxed than he had done before. “We are fine.”

“Okay,” Donna whispered.

She smiled at her daughter for a moment longer before she quietly closed the door and left the two of them alone. Felicity smiled. She and her mom were indeed getting along surprisingly well. She would feel ashamed that she had doubted the progress their relationship had made if hadn’t known that her mother had felt the same way.

Felicity wished she had always been so close to her mom especially now since she was a mother, too. Even thinking about falling out with Emmy or Tommy one day made her heart clench painfully in her chest. If there was any reason for her to wish that her babies wouldn’t grow up just yet, it was her fear of how their relationship would develop from here.

“F’licity?”

“Sorry,” Felicity mumbled as soon as she realized that her fingers had stopped moving. She quickly started the gentle caress again.

“You okay?” Oliver whispered.

“Yes,” Felicity whispered back. “I’m okay.”

“You’re sure?” he asked while he was moving the side of his face against her upper body with a low grumble.

“Yeah,” Felicity said with a low sigh. She took in a deep breath and frowned before she added, “I’m happy.”

“Enjoying my pain?”

Felicity chuckled as quietly as possible. She pressed a kiss to his hair before she whispered, “Just enjoying that I can take care of you.”

Oliver snored softly, and Felicity almost believed that he was back to sleep. He pressed his nose against the underside of her breasts, though, and quietly mumbled, “Yeah, I like that, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter (probably posted Thursday) will take us back to the last angst storyline. After the terrible ending I want to at least deliver subsequently the reasons for Samantha’s behavior. This doesn’t mean there is more angst. It’s just a heart-to-heart from one mother to another. If you didn’t “enjoy” the angst storyline, just skip the chapter please.


	152. From mother to mother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Author’s note:** Like I warned before I was asked to show Samantha’s point of view like I originally planned on for the end of the last angst storyline. Here it is. I think the fact that I had stomach cramps before posting this is no coincidence... 
> 
> On a happier note here are the [blacked out chapters to the next 48 chapters](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/149508061910/time-for-a-story-spoiler-alert).
> 
> The next updates will be on Saturday and Sunday. I will tell you then when it will continue. Right now I am working on chapter 155 which might be one of my favorite chapters to write in a while.

“Coming!” Felicity called out when the doorbell rang a second time.

Sighing, she dropped her pen to the table. She had hoped that she would get a little bit more work done while Oliver and the kids were outside in the park on a treasure hunt. Instead she had been put through two long phone calls from Thea and her mom and all she had managed to do was to get a painful ache in her neck.

She should have gone on that treasure hunt with her family, Felicity thought on her way to the door. She sighed once more, shaking her head. What a waste of time being here was!

Her thoughts were still revolving around how much better her day would have been if she had spent it with her family instead, so she hadn’t wasted one thought on who was visiting her when she took in the brunette woman in front of her door.

“Hi, Felicity.”

“Samantha.”

Felicity was almost sure she was staring at the woman in front of her. The last time she had talked to Samantha in person had been six months ago in Starling General Hospital. It had actually been the only time they had talked to each other in person. Since that one time they had only talked to each other on the phone when they and Oliver together had tried to discuss important decisions regarding William like how they would spend the Christmas holidays.

“Are you here to pick up William? I thought he was staying until tomorrow evening or-“

“No, that- that’s right,” Samantha hurried to say. She took in a deep breath, smiling a little insecurely at Felicity. “I was actually in San Francisco and almost on my way home when I figured that I should come here to talk to you actually. If you have a minute.”

“Oliver’s not home, sor-“

“No, I wanted to talk to you actually.”

Felicity frowned slightly, being more surprised than she thought she would be. Why would Samantha want to talk to her?

“Uhm,” Felicity made, glancing back over her shoulder to the chaos in her home. While Oliver had been preparing the treasure hunt in the park, the kids had prepared themselves for that adventure by exploring all the possible hiding places in here. She hadn’t cleaned up that mess yet.

“I’m sorry if the timing is bad. I probably should have called first,” Samantha hurried to say when Felicity didn’t answer. “I am so sorry. It was probably a bad idea to just come here. I will just-“

“No, wait,” Felicity interrupted Samantha when she had already taken a step back. “Come in. Just… don’t look around. It looks really horrible in here.”

“I’m the last to judge about that,” Samantha replied with a slight smile of relief. “And I only had one child at home to blame for the mess, not three.”

Felicity stepped aside to open the room more and allow Samantha to come in. If she was shocked by the mess, she hid it quite well. She kept a straight face, just looking at Felicity, who gestured towards the living room.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Felicity asked while she was leading Samantha there.

“No, thanks. I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

The two of them sat down in the living room on opposite sides of the couch table. For a long moment they just looked at each other without saying a word. Felicity was quite sure that this was just as awkward for Samantha as it was for her which didn’t exactly make it any easier to endure the silence that had settled.

“I wanted to apologize,” Samantha broke the silence after a while, “for how I handled this whole… situation at the beginning.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, biting her tongue. Apart from that one meeting in the hospital they had never talked about the troublesome way William had started being a part of the Queen Family. The only thing Felicity wanted was to forget about those months. Unfortunately, she hadn’t had much luck doing so yet and she doubted that she would ever really forget it.

“I think you already said that you are sorry,” Felicity replied, crossing her arms in front of her chest defensively.

“I know I did, and I also know that no apology can actually be enough to make up for what I put your family through,” Samantha explained. “In the last months I figured out that I didn’t even get why I did what I did. I am still not sure if I really figured out the right reasons now, but… uhm…”

Felicity nodded. She knew what Samantha meant. It was the same way she had been feeling when she had been in Las Vegas with her mom and told her about the whole situation. She had needed her help to figure out why she had endured the situation for so long without ever saying a word about how much it had hurt her.

“I don’t want to sound like I am trying to justify what I did,” Samantha said with some hesitation, “but if it is okay for you, I would like to explain it nonetheless. We are kind of raising a child together, and I think that might be difficult when we don’t get along.”

Again Felicity nodded slowly. She bit her tongue while she was waiting for Samantha to explain her reasons for why she had done what she had done. Felicity wasn’t sure if she really wanted to hear them, but Samantha was right. If they never talked about it and never truly cleared the air between them, it would get difficult to support William as best as they could.

Felicity wasn’t even really mad at Samantha. She was sure that she had had her reasons. Felicity was a mother, too. She understood that sometimes you did wrong things because you wanted to protect your child. It was just hard to think the same way when some other mother’s seemingly protecting behavior had hurt her family.

“Ever since my parents died ten years ago, it was only William and me. Whatever relationships I had never lasted long because being a single mother is not exactly attracting men,” Samantha added with a low sigh. “At some point I stopped trying to find someone because I didn’t want William to get to know and grow to like someone for that person to leave his life soon after. So I stayed alone which didn’t matter to me because I had William, and he was all I wanted and needed. He has always been my priority.”

“Well, kids always should be a priority, shouldn’t they?”

Samantha nodded. “Yes, absolutely. When I ran into Oliver and he put one and one together about William, everything changed, though. Suddenly it wasn’t only William and me anymore. There was Oliver, and he wanted to get to know William and he wanted William to like him and it was something I just couldn’t control. Whenever I felt a boyfriend wasn’t ready to be a part of William’s life, I broke up with him. I couldn’t do that with Oliver because he wasn’t in William’s life because of me. He was there just because of William and that scared me. I couldn’t just get rid of Oliver like I could do with my boyfriends, and all I could think about was that if Oliver turned out to be no good for William or if he ever changed his mind, I wouldn’t be able to protect William from getting hurt.”

Felicity frowned. “Shouldn’t the fact that Oliver wanted to be in William’s life _because_ of William instead of despite of him have told you that he wasn’t going to change his mind easily?”

“Rationally speaking, yes,” Samantha replied with a sad chuckle. “I wasn’t thinking rationally, though. I have had some really bad experience with men, so I didn’t really trust Oliver to stick around. I thought if the situation with William got inconvenient for him, he would leave. He would leave William for I don’t know… for you, for his other children, for whatever reason because why not? I know now that I was wrong.”

“Oliver is a devoted father,” Felicity whispered. “He would never leave his children.”

And if he ever did, she would probably leave him. The one thing that she felt she would never be able to forgive a man was if he abandoned one if his children. She had been abandoned by her father, and it had been terrible. It still occupied her mind and made her feel insecure now though it had been like twenty years ago that he had felt. She couldn’t be with a man who did that to his own children, whether it were biological his or theirs.

It was actually why she felt so safe with Oliver. He loved his children so much, he would never leave them. Apart from the little moments of insecurity when he might be locking himself away for a second, he was always there for the kids. His children would never end up missing their dad and wondering why they hadn’t been good enough for him like she did.

Felicity took in a deep breath, pushing the thoughts of her own fatherless childhood away. Frowning, she looked back at Samantha.

“So you’re saying that you tried to make the situation as hard as possible to test if Oliver was leaving?” Felicity asked.

“I think that was one of the reasons for why I did what I did that I only discovered later, yes,” Samantha replied with a nod of her head. “I told myself that I was only trying to protect William as best as I could. So if Oliver left, William would only loose his father and not an entire family.”

“He would have lost his siblings, too. You let him meet them.”

“He started to ask about them more and more. Oliver told him a lot about Emmeline and Thomas, and I couldn’t keep disappointing William, so I concocted a new excuse for why I could let him meet them, but not you, something that made me feel better than admitting that I was just too scared. I told myself that I was just protecting him because I didn’t know you. You could be a terrible person like the stepmothers in the fairytales. It was a weak excuse, and I knew that, but I couldn’t let go of it.” Samantha took in a deep breath. “I think I realized at that time already that what I was actually scared of wasn’t that Oliver or you would hurt William. I was actually more scared that you were going to replace me.”

“I would have never-“

“You wouldn’t have needed to try,” Samantha hurried to say. “After everything Oliver told me about you and after everything Emmeline said about you – she loves you very much, you know that? I hope my son speaks half as highly of me when I am not there as your daughter talks about you.”

Felicity smiled, feeling her heart warming at the thought of what Emmy might have said. She knew that her daughter could say very lovely things because she had spoken about Oliver to her so often. Oliver had always said that she talked the same way about Felicity when she wasn’t around. Yet it felt good to hear someone else confirm that.

“She’s usually more of a daddy’s girl,” she mumbled with a slight smile.

“I think I knew that you were a good person and that was almost more scaring than thinking that you might be an evil stepmother. Because how was I supposed to compete with you and your family? You could offer William everything he always wanted. You are a stabile family with more kids, a great home and kind of a lot of money. I was scared, and I didn’t know how to deal with it and I messed up. And I am truly sorry. I know that it caused a lot of trouble.”

“Understatement of the year,” Felicity mumbled.

Samantha lowered her gaze to her hands in her lap. She looked guilty, and Felicity believed her when she said that she was sorry. She sighed.

“Look, I know that you are sorry,” she said, “and I understand what drove you to do this. At least I think so. My dad left when I was a little girl, so I know what it’s like to be abandoned. I wouldn’t want that for my children or for any other child. That is why I let this go on for so long. I didn’t want to stand in between Oliver and William. From mother to mother I am not sure what I would have done in your situation.”

“You weren’t in my situation, though.”

“Right.”

“And I guess that means that you can’t forgive me?” Samantha asked.

“I can forgive you,” Felicity replied. “I am just not sure if I can get over it enough for us to become friends or anything. I think the best we can do is trying to trust each other and work with each other enough to offer William the best life possible.”

Samantha nodded. “That is already more than I was daring to ask for.”

The two of them looked at each other for a long time. Felicity felt relieved that they had had this talk. It had been over-due. Of course it wasn’t all love, peace and harmony now, but it was good enough to do what had brought them together to start with. They were able to raise William together, and that was all that mattered. That was everything Felicity had hoped they would do when Samantha and William had stepped into her life.

“I am glad we could talk this out,” Felicity said with a sigh.

“Yes, so I am,” Samantha replied.

Felicity didn’t miss the way Samantha seemed still quite tense and not as relieved as she probably should be given that she had just poured out her heart to Felicity. Frowning, she asked, “Is there anything more?”

Samantha took in a deep breath. “No, that’s it.”

Felicity just perked up her eyebrows in question, asking what was going on without using any word. What more could there be to say?

“I only realized how difficult everything I put you through, even apart from not letting you meet him, was once the situation turned. Since William started visiting you here every other week, he is often tired. He barely gets out of bed on Mondays and… I figured that the situation is terrible. Since we didn’t have the best start, though, I felt it was necessary to ask you if you were okay if we changed that.”

Felicity frowned. “If you suggest that we should move to Central City, I feel like I need to disappoint you. I’ve got a company and-“

“No, no,” Samantha hurried to say. “It’s actually the other way around. I was in San Francisco today to apply for a job.”

“San Francisco?” Felicity asked. “That’s right around the corner.”

“Yes, it is. William wouldn’t have to take a flight to visit you. A short ride on the train or the bus and he would be here. You could see each other more often. I wouldn’t have to be limited to the weekends. I just wanted to ask if that was okay for you because I don’t want it to look like I am… I don’t know… trying anything? Like if Oliver doesn’t come to Central City anymore, I come here to…”

She gestured around, unsure how to say what she wanted to say. Felicity didn’t need to hear the words to understand, though.

“I don’t think that you are trying to pinch my husband.”

“Okay, great,” Samantha said with a sigh of relief. “So it was okay if we moved to San Francisco?

“Yes, absolutely,” Felicity replied with a smile. “I am sure Oliver will be happy to hear that. And of course I am happy, too. I like to have William here. He is great with his siblings. Emmy adores him and Tommy likes having him around which means a lot because Tommy is quite picky about who is allowed to keep him company.”

“The job offer looks great. I will need some further training and take classes during some weekends. It would be great if William could come here then.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied again. “He is always welcome here.”

“I am glad to hear that.” Again the two of them smiled at each other for a long moment before Samantha added, “That was actually all I wanted to say. I better go now, so William doesn’t even see me being here. I guess that would be weird for him. Will you tell Oliver about San Francisco?”

Felicity nodded. “Sure.”

Together they walked to the door.

“Thanks for hearing me out. I don’t know if I would have done it if I was in your position.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I just hope everything will get easier now.”

“Yes, so do I. I’ll call if there is news about when we will move to San Francisco.”

“Yes, that’s great. If there is anything we can do to help, just call.”

“Thank you, Felicity,” Samantha said, stepping outside. She had already taken the first steps towards the street when she turned around again. “William really likes you by the way. He told me that sometimes he is a little insecure when you’re around because you’re Emmeline’s and Thomas’ mom, and he is scared that he does something wrong and you could get mad and not trust him with them anymore, but… He says you are really great and nothing like the evil stepmothers in the fairy tales.”

Felicity smiled. “I am glad to hear that.”

Samantha lifted her hand to wave goodbye before she turned around and headed towards the bus stop. Felicity watched her for a moment before she closed the door and sighed in relief. It seemed like this chapter of her life was now finally closed once and for all. Now it was really all about looking forward and given that William would be closer she felt like it was a good future that was waiting for them.


	153. For daddy

In those six years that they had been together now Felicity had woken up before Oliver maybe a handful of times. If he wasn’t sick or had a massive hangover or been through a really rough night, Oliver always woke up before her. Even in his sleep he was usually hyper-aware of everything that happened around him. The quietest noise could wake him up.

It was why Felicity savored the few times when she woke up before him so much. It happened so rarely that she enjoyed when she got the chance to watch Oliver peacefully sleep beside her even more.

She turned onto her side as quietly as possible, so she was facing Oliver and could take him in even more carefully. She had trouble keeping her hands from reaching out and moving over his relaxed face. The thought of touching him was tempting. She knew that he would wake up when she touched him, though, and she wanted to enjoy this moment with him being asleep as long as it lasted.

Seeing Oliver so peaceful was nothing new to her. The tortured soul he had been in his first years back from the island had found peace when they had started a family. When he was at home around his family, he could let go of everything that burdened him and just be the man he had always wanted to be. He could be a loving husband and an amazing father and-

“Felicity?” Oliver asked with hoarse voice, interrupting her thoughts.

“Hm?”

“It’s not nice staring at a sleeping man,” he explained without opening his eyes.

“I’m not staring,” Felicity replied, not surprised at all that he had woken up. He was that aware of his surroundings that even in his sleep he realized when someone stared at him. “I am just watching you closely.”

“Why?” he asked back, still not opening his eyes. “Did you forget how I look over night?”

“I could never forget how you look.”

“Glad to hear that.”

“I do think there are a few more wrinkles around your eyes that haven’t been there yesterday, though.”

Oliver opened his eyes with a dramatic gasp for breath. “Do you want to tell me that I am getting old?”

“Would I do such a horrible thing?” Felicity asked back.

“I don’t know if you would do that, but I certainly know that you shouldn’t do it because it’s no good wifey-behavior.”

“Oh, you think?”

“I am very sure, yes,” Oliver replied with teasingly strict voice. “It’s no good behavior for a wife in generally, but it’s especially bad behavior when it’s her husband’s birthday.”

“Oh, it’s your birthday,” Felicity said like she only know realized. “I guess I should be on my best behavior then, shouldn’t I?”

“Well, maybe not the best behavior in general,” Oliver replied, reaching out a hand to move his fingertips from her knee up her naked thigh to the edge of her panties, “but your best wifey-behavior, yes.”

Chuckling, Felicity sat up in bed and moved one leg over Oliver’s body, so she was straddling him. Without any hesitation she leaned down and kissed him gently, brushing her lips against his and swiping her tongue over his bottom lip. Oliver’s arms wrapped around her back and pulled her down onto him. They both groaned when he rubbed his morning wood against her clothed center.

“Did you mean this when you asked for my best wifey-behavior?”

“Yes, that is exactly what I meant,” Oliver replied between two kisses.

He stroked his tongue into her mouth and pulled her hips down on him. Felicity groaned, feeling her need for him grow. She was just about to lower his sweatpants when Oliver pulled back a little.

“We get visitors.”

Before Felicity could ask him what he meant, the door was flung open.

“Happy birthday, daddy!”

“Dada!”

Chuckling, Felicity slid off Oliver’s lap to make room for the kids. Emmy was holding Tommy on his hand, helping him into bed first before following him onto the mattress. While Tommy immediately crawled to Felicity, sitting down on her lap and snuggling his cheek to her breasts with a yawn, Emmy crawled to Oliver.

“Happy birthday, daddy,” she said once more.

“Thank you, sweetie.”

She crawled as close as possible to him, propping her hands up onto his chest and leaning over to kiss him gently.

“Did you sleep well, daddy?” she asked him.

“Oh, yes,” Oliver replied, “and mommy woke me very gently.”

Felicity bit her tongue, biting back the comment about how much nicer it would have gotten if Emmy and Tommy hadn’t interrupted.

“Did you show daddy the surprise yet?” Emmy asked Felicity with wide eyes.

Felicity shook her head. “Of course I didn’t. It’s your surprise. You can show it to him.”

“I get a surprise?”

Emmy nodded proudly. “I made it. William helped me and Tommy, too.”

“Now you got me interested,” Oliver said, stroking his hand up and down Emmy’s back. “Will you show the surprise to me now?”

Emmy shook her head. “First the other presents.”

Felicity smiled at how proud Emmy was. She and William had baked Oliver a cake yesterday, and if it had been up to her, she had given it to Oliver yesterday already. She was just so proud of the result of the baking. Felicity tried to tell herself that the only reason Emmy had forbidden her to help had been because she had wanted to do it herself. She refused to admit that the real reason might have been that Emmy knew exactly how little trust Oliver had in Felicity’s baking skills.

Emmy slid back a little on Oliver’s legs, so she was sitting on his knees. She looked at her little brother with a smile. “Tommy, you start with your present.”

Tommy looked at her for a long moment before he crawled to Oliver. He sat down on his dad’s chest and held out his hand.

“Dada, stone!”

“Wow, you give me one of your stones?” Oliver asked him.

Tommy nodded. “Stone.”

“Thank you so much,” Oliver said. He took the stone from his son’s tiny hand and looked at it. “It is beautiful.”

Holding Tommy to his chest, Oliver sat up and kissed Tommy’s lips. Felicity chuckled at how Tommy scrunched his nose and pushed Oliver’s face away. Tommy just wasn’t much of a cuddler, at least when he wasn’t the one who started the cuddling. And as if he wanted to show his daddy that he couldn’t just cuddle him whenever he wanted, Tommy took the stone from Oliver’s hand and crawled back to Felicity.

“Tommy, no! It’s daddy’s stone now,” Emmy complained over her parents’ chuckles.

She reached out to take the stone from him, eliciting a high-pitched cry from Tommy.

“If he wants to keep the stone, he should keep it,” Oliver said, putting his hand to Emmy’s wrist to keep her from just taking the stone from her little brother. “It’s okay.”

Emmy sighed dramatically, but she let go of her brother and turned to her daddy instead. She pulled a piece of paper from the pocket of her pajama pants and handed it to Oliver.

“Thank you, sweetie,” he said with a smile, starting to unfold the paper. He took in the picture she had drawn for him before he read out, “From Emmy for daddy. Wow! Did you write that yourself?”

“William helped. He showed me how to do it,” Emmy replied, nodding her head. It soon turned into a frown, though. “Why isn’t William here today?”

“He has to write a test in school, remember?” Felicity asked. “He needed to learn a lot during the weekend.”

“But why can’t he come later?”

“It’s because it’s a long way,” Oliver explained. “But he’s soon moving closer, so he will come here more often.”

“That’s good,” Emmy replied before she crawled even closer to Oliver and pointed at the picture. “See? That is William. And that’s Tommy. And that’s you and me.”

“You did that really great, Emmy. Thank you,” Oliver said before he pressed a kiss to her temple.

“Hey, am I on the picture, too?” Felicity asked, sliding closer with Tommy in her arms.

“Of course!” Emmy called out, pointing at a drawn figure. “That’s you, mommy.”

“And did I eat a lot of chocolate that my tummy is so round?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

“No,” Emmy replied with a chuckle. “You’re having a baby!”

“What?” Oliver asked immediately, turning his head towards Felicity. “You’re-“

“No!” Felicity hurried to say.

“So that’s not the surprise?”

“No,” Felicity replied, leaning forward to look Emmy into her eyes. “Emmy, why would you think mommy is having a baby?”

Emmy shrugged her shoulders. “Can’t we have another baby? Tommy’s already so big.”

“Tommy?” Tommy asked.

“Yes, Tommy,” Felicity replied, tickling his tummy. “That’s you.”

Oliver cleared his throat. “Well, Emmy, that’s not so easy. Mommy and daddy would have to talk about that first.”

“You talk about that now,” Emmy replied immediately. “So can we have another baby now?”

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head, “Don’t you want to show me the surprise now?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed, forgetting all about the baby talk and jumping out of bed. Immediately she started tugging at Oliver’s hand. “Daddy, come on! I want to show you the surprise now!”

“I am already getting up,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

Felicity followed suit and got out of bed with Tommy in her arms. The boy dropped his head to her shoulder with a sigh. He was rubbing the stone he had taken back from Oliver against her chest, scratching her skin. When Emmy couldn’t wait any longer, she let go of her father’s hand, already running downstairs. Felicity was about to follow when Oliver turned around to her.

“She is almost as addicted to babies as I am.”

“Oliver, nobody is as addicted to babies as you are,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. She looked at Oliver closely. “You would like to have another, right?”

“I think-“

“Daddy! Come downstairs now!”

Oliver chuckled. “I think it would be great to have another human being ordering us around like that, right? How could one not love the idea of another terror dwarf like her?”

Felicity sighed. “I have no idea where she got this from.”

“Definitely from you.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yes, definitely.”

“Be careful, mister, or I cut birthday sex.”

Oliver gasped. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me,” Felicity replied in a playful whisper, winking at him, before leaving the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anyone know for sure when Felicity’s birthday is? I remember reading it was somewhey in May, but then Guggie joked it was March 29th. Do we know when her birthday is?


	154. With family and friends

“Mama, stone!”

Felicity looked down to Tommy, who was pulling at the hem of her dress to catch her attention. He was holding out a stone for her. When she tried to take it from him, though, he quickly pulled it back against his chest and shot her a stern look.

“Hey, do you want to show the stone to me?” Thea asked, crouching down in front of her little nephew and smiling at him encouragingly.

Tommy hesitated for a short moment. He seemed to be unsure of whether his aunt was going to steal the very precious stone from him. He decided not to take a risk and kept the stone against him. Only when Thea’s smile widened a little more, he stepped forward and showed it to her. He didn’t allow her to take it from him, though. He only held it close to her face.

“It’s beautiful,” Thea said, “but it looks a little dirty. Should we go wash it?”

Immediately Tommy nodded, took her hand and led her to the water table. Felicity’s gaze followed the two of them. The birthday boy had showed little interest in Laurel’s present at first. Once Oliver and Quentin had set the water table up and Tommy had realized that the table offered perfect opportunity to play with the stones he had collected during the last months, the table had become his favorite present, though.

“The kids seem to be getting along quite well,” Lyla stated, leaning closer to Felicity. “If I didn’t know, I wouldn’t assume that William hasn’t been in Emmy’s and Tommy’s lives from the start.”

“Yes, they are really close. Emmy adores William.”

Felicity smiled while her eyes were following Lyla’s gaze to where William was cutting some of the cake for Emmy and Sara. Since he had arrived earlier this morning, he had taken care that the two girls and his little brother had everything they needed. It was nice to watch him taking care of them, and Felicity had to admit that it was also quite nice that she didn’t have to keep an eye on Tommy the entire time. She trusted William with his siblings.

“And the situation with Samantha?”

“Way better,” Felicity replied with a low sigh. “Once they will move to San Francisco at the end of July, I think it should be fully resolved. It will be easier for all of us when William doesn’t have to take a flight every time he comes to visit us. I am already looking forward to when that chapter is finally over for good.”

“Glad to get back a little more normality?”

Felicity sighed, looking at William. “He has become a part of our lives and that is great. We actually have found some normality with how it is right now, but it would still be nice if it was a little… easier, you know?”

Lyla nodded. “I don’t doubt that.”

“On a happier note,” Felicity added, turning around to Lyla, “this is the first time we are all together here. Since we know William, either he wasn’t allowed to come here, my mom didn’t make it or our friends from Central City couldn’t come. So this is the first time all of us are here.”

“I think that is something we should toast to,” Lyla said, chinking her water glass with Felicity’s glass of champagne. “It’s really nice we are all here together for something good. Maybe we will soon get around to do this more often.”

Felicity took a sip of her champagne and sighed. “It feels like we are deciding to do so every time we are all together, but we never manage to do so.”

“I think we need more kids in the team,” Lyla said with a chuckle. “We only get around meeting altogether for Christmas or the kids’ birthdays. We don’t even make it for our birthdays most of the time. Someone is always missing. Only when it’s about the kids everyone takes the time.”

“Don’t say that too loud,” Felicity said quietly, shooting a gaze to where Oliver and John were talking to each other. “When Oliver hears that, it will only give him ideas.”

Lyla frowned. “Is everything alright between the two of you?”

Felicity nodded quickly. “Yes, we are fine. It’s just… I think Oliver wants another baby.”

“And you don’t?”

Felicity sighed. “I am not sure yet. I think I need a little more time to think about it. Oliver would never push it, no matter how much he wants another one, but I can’t talk to him about it until I am sure that I made my decision. I don’t want to give him false hope.”

“Well, I am always here to talk to you if that helps.”

“Thanks, Lyla,” Felicity said with a smile. “I really appreciate that.”

“You know, I was actually-“

“Mama!” Tommy interrupted, tugging at the hem of Felicity’s dress. “Tommy cake!”

“You want cake?” Felicity asked, and Tommy nodded. Placing her glass on the table behind her, she lifted her son into her arms and turned around to Lyla. “What were you-?”

“It’s not that important,” Lyla said, waving off whatever she had meant to say. “Let’s get that sweet birthday boy some cake.”

“I will take care of that,” Felicity replied with a chuckle.

While Lyla sat down at the table where Laurel, Cisco and Caitlin were chatting about the last weekend they had spent together in Central City, Felicity carried Tommy over to where they had placed the cake Oliver had baked for their son. She cut a slice and put in on a plate.

“Are we going to daddy with the cake?” she asked Tommy.

“Dada,” Tommy said, nodding his head.

Felicity headed towards where Oliver was standing at the edge of the terrace, still talking to John. She was only a few feet away when Oliver said, “Well, congratulations, man.”

“I think it’s a little too soon for congratulations yet, but maybe soon,” John replied with a wide smile.

“Congratulations on what?” Felicity asked, approaching the two of them.

“Hey, there’s my little boy,” Oliver said, taking Tommy from her to kiss his cheek. “Are you enjoying your party?”

“Tommy cake,” he answered, pointing at the plate in Felicity’s hands.

Oliver took it from her and lifted the slice of cake to Tommy’s lips. The boy took a bite and chewed. Felicity felt her heart warming at the sight, but nonetheless she turned to John.

“Congratulations on what?” she repeated her question, cocking her head slightly.

“Nothing,” John replied. He clapped Oliver’s shoulder before kissing Felicity’s cheek. “It’s a great party by the way.”

Without letting her say anything more he walked away. Felicity looked after him and watched him starting a conversation with Donna and Quentin.

“And one bite for mama,” Oliver said, lifting the slice of cake to Tommy’s lips once more.

“Congratulations on what?” Felicity now asked Oliver.

Oliver looked at her with a chuckle. “Don’t be so nosy.”

“Like I could stop that,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes slightly. “So congratulations on what?”

“You will know soon enough.”

“I could know even sooner, though, if-“

“Don’t you think it’s really nice that everyone is here?” Oliver interrupted her. “This is the first time we are all together with William. Sara seems to like him almost as much as Emmy.”

Felicity cocked her head. “If that was a try to change the subject, it was really bad.”

Chuckling, Oliver leaned forward and kissed her lips. His lips moved from hers over her cheek to her ear. He moved his stubble against her sensitive skin for a short moment before he whispered, “If you stop asking about it, I might be very, very grateful tonight.”

Wincing quietly, Felicity rubbed her thighs together. Oliver was really good at showing how grateful he was. Felicity cleared her throat. “You can’t promise me something like this when there are still hours before we can put that into action.”

Oliver chuckled. “Well, I need to be sure you won’t be asking about it anymore, so-“

“You know what? I will just go somewhere over there,” Felicity said, gesturing somewhere else. “That way I won’t even be able to ask and-“

She had already taken the first step away, when Oliver quickly took her fingers and pulled her back against him. Tommy made a discontent sound and struggled in his dad’s arms, so Oliver set him down on the floor. He put his now free hands to Felicity’s hips and pulled her against him, so her back was resting against his warm chest. Felicity dropped her head back to his shoulder and closed his eyes for a moment. Oliver’s lips pressed to her ear in the meantime.

“This party is really nice, isn’t it?” he asked, slowly swaying in time with the music.

“Yes, it’s great,” Felicity replied. Oliver slid his arms around her chest, and she held onto his strong forearms, gently stroking his soft skin. “The cake is delicious by the way.”

“Thank you so much. Emmy and I had a lot of fun baking it.”

“Fun that I wasn’t invited to participate in.”

“For reasons as we both know,” Oliver replied with a chuckle and pressed a kiss to the soft spot right under her ears. “Or do I have to remind you that during our second wedding you vowed to never bake again?”

“No,” Felicity said with a groan. “You remind me so often, I do remember by now.”

“But I like rubbing that in.”

“Oliver?” Felicity asked, shooting a look at him over her shoulder. She waited until he was looking at her with perked up eyebrows before he added, “Shut up.”

Oliver ducked his head and pressed a kiss to the side of Felicity’s neck, chuckling against her skin. She leaned a little bit more against him, looking around at their family and friends.

“I think we should do this more often,” Felicity heard herself say the same words Lyla had said to her before.

“I feel we are always deciding on doing so, but never actually do it,” Oliver replied.

Felicity chuckled. “I said the same thing when Lyla said we need to do this more often.”

“We just think the same.”

“Yes, we do,” Felicity replied with a sigh, closing her eyes for a moment. She turned her head and pressed her nose against his shoulder to breathe him in. “You know, we should actually talk to our guests since we can talk to each other anytime.”

Sighing, Oliver lowered his head and kissed her shoulder. His arms tightened around her, keeping her to him. “Just stay here one more minute, okay?”

“Okay,” Felicity replied, moving her head against Oliver’s shoulder. “One more minute.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like after I complained about comments pulling me down from time to time lately, it was only fair to tell you about much I love writing this story at the moment. During the weekend I wanted to finish writing the next chapter and then start writing the second chapter of a new multichapter I started working on. Instead I wrote two more chapters of Time for a story because right now I love this story more than I did in a long time. If I could I would just share the next chapters with you already, but I can’t. I really need to work on that new multichapter, so I have a few chapters of that finished when I want to start posting. That is why I decided to give you the next updates on Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. All three of them might be on the list of my favorite chapters because writing them was just so much fun.   
> xoxo Kathi


	155. The baby-making

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to mequebecolicityfan for letting me work this wonderful artwork! It’s perfect for the chapter. Please check out [her blog](http://mequebecolicityfan.tumblr.com/) and send her some love because her Olicity edits are true gold!

“Tommy’s finally back asleep,” Felicity said with a yawn when she stepped into the bedroom and walked right towards the en-suite bathroom. “He has been crying so heartbrokenly. I might have joined in if it had taken much longer.”

Oliver turned from his back onto his stomach and rested his cheek on his hands. He was facing towards the door to the bathroom that Felicity had left ajar. That way he could watch her brushing her long blonde hair over her right shoulder. She held her head bent to the side, so the left side of her neck seemed so much longer. Oliver felt the desire to go over to her and brush his lips against the sensitive skin and move his fingers under the fabric of her dress to play with her nipples, feeling them harden against his fingertips. He stayed where was and continued to watch her instead, though.

She slowly lowered the zipper at the side of her dress and took the fabric off. She wiggled her hips a little to get the fabric over her wide hips. It made Oliver’s gaze lower to the perfect curve of her ass. Only covered by some lacy panties it was perfectly accentuated. God, he loved her ass.

Lately he caught himself watching Felicity more and more. He had always liked to watch her especially when she didn’t notice because he just enjoyed it. He enjoyed watching her in their everyday life. It was his way of reminding himself how far he had come since the island and how far they had come since they had first met. He loved how he knew her routines like how she closely eyed up her face while brushing her teeth, checking for any signs of tiredness or exhaustion in her face.

Those last few days he had watched her more than usually, though. It had taken him some time until he had figured out the reason why. Well, maybe it wasn’t the reason, but anyway he had realized that Felicity too was watching him lately. Just like he had enjoyed watching her for years now he knew she had enjoyed watching him for years too. Something felt different now, though. He couldn’t really say what was different or how it was different, not even if it was a good or a bad different, but either way it was different. At least it felt different.

He wondered what was going on in her head, Oliver thought, focusing his gaze back on her. She had washed off her make-up and was now wearing one of his white shirts like she did most of the times for sleep. She was a natural beauty and the most beautiful when she smiled without any make-up on her face. She was smiling a lot lately, telling him that she was happy. Hence whatever it was that was on her mind couldn’t be too bad if she was happy, right? Oliver felt like he didn’t have to worry, but he was nosy. He wanted to know what was on her mind. Usually he knew what she was thinking about, but this time it felt-

“Oliver?”

“What?” Oliver asked, startling out of his thoughts.

Felicity stood right in front of him, looking at him with her arms crossed in front of her chest. “Did you listen to any of what I just said?”

“Yes,” he replied automatically, but of course Felicity knew better. She perked up her eyebrow, shooting him a doubting gaze that made him smile. “No. Sorry.”

Chuckling, Felicity climbed onto the bed and lay down on his back. She kissed his shoulder before resting her head there. Her hands slid from his biceps down his arms to his hands and back up again. Sighing, she pressed her lips to his shoulder once more and breathed him in.

“Everything alright with you?” she asked. “You’ve been thinking a lot lately.”

“So did you,” Oliver replied.

He smiled when he felt Felicity rubbing her cheek against his shoulder with a low sigh. She pushed her nose against his skin once more, nuzzling one of his scars there. Her fingertips were tapping on his biceps playfully and her cold toes pressed against his calves.

“Yes, I did,” she whispered after a while, her lips moving against his skin.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not yet I think.”

Oliver frowned slightly. He moved his right hand away from under his face and grabbed her hand on his left bicep to gently squeeze her fingers. He turned his head back as far as possible even if he still couldn’t see her face that way.

“You would tell me if something was bothering you, right?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “It’s not something bad. I promise.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered.

“Do you want to talk about what’s on your mind tonight?” Felicity asked, squeezing his fingers and gently moving her thumb over the knuckles of his hand.

Oliver hesitated for the beat of a second, considering his options. He rested his head back on his forearm with a sigh and shook his head. “No.”

“It’s not something bad, I hope?”

Smiling, Oliver shook his head. “No, it’s not. I’d tell you if it was worth it.”

Felicity pressed her lips to his shoulder and peppered a series of kisses there before she rested her head back down. Sighing quietly, Oliver closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment. He loved quiet moments with Felicity like this one. He could feel her heart beating against his ribs, and he could feel her body moving with each intake of breath. When she breathed out, her breath grazed his skin.

He could easily fall asleep like this. Though it was quite warm at the end of June and the warmth of Felicity’s body against his skin didn’t help to cool him, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I’m thinking about having another baby.”

Oliver opened his eyes. “What?”

“I’m thinking about having another baby,” Felicity repeated in a whisper. “Sometimes I think I am ready, but then I think that maybe I am not. It’s… I haven’t really made a decision yet.”

“How long have you been thinking about this?” he asked gently.

“For a while actually,” she replied, her voice even quieter than before, “but your birthday when Emmy gave you that picture that showed me being pregnant, it has become more and more important.”

Oliver nodded slightly. He remembered how for a short moment he had thought his birthday surprise was Felicity being pregnant again. He knew that Felicity hadn’t missed how happy he had been at that thought. He had tried his best to hide the slight disappointed he had felt when Felicity had told him that she was not pregnant, but just like Felicity he had thought about another baby a lot since that moment. It had only increased a few weeks later when-

“John and Lyla are trying for a baby.”

Felicity’s fingers stopped moving on his skin, and she held her breath for a moment. “What?”

“He told me on Tommy’s birthday,” Oliver replied. “It was what the congratulations were about.”

“So Lyla is pregnant?” Felicity asked.

“No. They are just trying. I just… felt like congratulating him already,” Oliver replied. When Felicity didn’t answer, he added, “I asked John not to tell you because I didn’t want you to feel pressured into making a decision if you want another baby. I still don’t want you to feel pressured. You know that, right?”

“Yes, I know that you would never want to pressure me,” she replied and made a short pause. “You would like to have another baby, though.”

It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. Felicity knew that he wanted another baby. She didn’t have to ask him about that. Yet Oliver felt like he needed to maybe not take that back, but at least modify or explain this.

“It’s not that easy,” he told her. “The fact that I want another baby doesn’t mean that we should-“

He stopped when Felicity suddenly sat up and slid off him to kneel down on the mattress instead. The missing warmth of her body left a chilly feeling on his back. Oliver’s heart clenched painfully in his chest as a result of his worry that maybe he had taken this too far. Babies were a sensitive topic for the two of them, but especially for Felicity. It was why he hadn’t even addressed it. He had wanted Felicity to decide when or if she wanted to talk about this at all. Now that she had taken the first step, though, he felt like not telling her that he was thinking about it too was almost like lying to her.

“You need to turn around,” Felicity suddenly said.

“What?”

“You need to turn around,” she repeated with firm voice. “I can’t talk to you about this without looking at you. So please turn around.”

Oliver did as she asked. He quickly turned onto his back and sat up, so his back was leaning against the headboard of the bed. Locking eyes with her, he held out a hand for Felicity. Just like she couldn’t talk to him about this without looking at him, he couldn’t talk to her about this without touching her. Felicity didn’t hesitate. She took his hand and crawled over the mattress until she sat between his spread legs with her legs wrapped around his hips loosely.

He gently framed her face with his hands. Stroking his thumbs over the sensitive skin that covered her cheekbones, Oliver took Felicity in before he leaned forward and kissed her. It was a soft and unhurried kiss that knew no dominance and no hurry. Felicity sighed against his lips and held onto his wrists when he gently opened her lips to his tongue. When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against hers. He gently pecked her lips once more before he pulled back enough to look her in the eyes.

“I love you, Felicity,” he said with firm voice, making sure there was no way she could doubt his words, “and nothing that will be said tonight will change that. You know that, right?”

Felicity took in a slightly sniffling breath, nodding her head when tears sprang to her eyes. “Yes, I know.”

Oliver gently wiped away a tear that had escaped the corner of her eye. He continued to hold her face in his hands when he explained, “What I was going to say is that this decision isn’t exactly easy for us. Wanting a baby is not enough. We can’t just decide that we want another baby and ignore everything else. We’ve been through a lot during the last pregnancy, and I think it’s important we make sure that we are both willing and ready to risk that it will happen again because it might happen again.”

The depression during the pregnancy with Tommy had hit their marriage hard. Oliver had had no idea what had been going on with Felicity and her rejecting behavior had hurt him. Once he had known what had gotten into her it had all made perfectly sense of course, but the time before that had been like hell. He had honestly thought she didn’t love him anymore.

“Of course it would be different this time,” Oliver continued after a while, “because rationally we know what we are dealing with right now. I can understand what is going on with you now, and I can help you more than I could the last time.”

Oliver couldn’t count how many books he had read about prenatal depression since he had known that Felicity had suffered from it. He had wanted to be prepared in case the depression would have come back later in the pregnancy. It hadn’t come back, though. Luckily, he should add.

“The thing is,” Oliver added with a quiet sigh, “that no matter how much we prepare for the depression to come back and no matter how much I will be trying to help you, you will still have to suffer through it. We don’t know if it will come back. We might be lucky and have a happy pregnancy, but the risk that that won’t happen is there. And given that it’s your health that is at risk I am not even sure it’s worth it.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, watching Felicity’s face closely. She had listened to his words carefully, not saying a word. Her eyes had stayed locked on his the entire time. Her fingers had tightened around his wrist, though.

Felicity frowned a little. “We could do it together, though. We could survive it together and get through it together. Right?”

“I will be there every step of the way,” Oliver promised her. “No matter what will happen, no matter what you will do or say, I will stay with you. I won’t be able to take your pain, though. I can be there for you, but I cannot take the depression from you. Do you know what I mean?”

As a couple Oliver felt they were safe. Their relationship wouldn’t suffer from another prenatal depression because Oliver understood it now. He just feared that Felicity as an individual and the one who had the depression was going to suffer too much from it. She had been miserable when she had suffered from that depression years ago, and he never wanted her to feel that miserable and helpless and lost again. Being forced to watch her suffer through something like that again was his worst fear.

Felicity snuggled her face into the touch of his hands for a moment before she linked her fingers with his and lowered them between them. She looked down at their fingers for a long moment, biting down on her bottom lip. Oliver watched her and waited patiently for her to be ready to tell him what she was thinking.

“I think you explained this very accurately,” she started, looking back up and locking eyes with him, “and I agree with everything you said except for one thing.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow in question. “And that is?”

“Unlike you I am sure that it will be worth it,” Felicity replied. “Despite the depression and the problems that it caused for us we had good moments too, didn’t we?”

“Of course,” Oliver replied, squeezing her fingers.

“And we got Tommy,” Felicity replied with a smile. “He is crazily exhausting,” – Oliver chuckled at the way Felicity rolled her eyes – “but he was worth it. When I look at him, I know it was all worth it. I don’t want to be put through a depression again. I can’t think about anyone who would want that, but… If that is what we might have to risk to have the joy of becoming parents once more and expanding our family a little bit more, I am willing to take it.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, thinking about Felicity’s words. Of course they were happy to have Tommy. As exhausting as the little boy could be, he also brought so much joy to their life and they loved him so much. Oliver couldn’t think about a life without him anymore. It was different now, though, because they were actively making the choice to risk another depression for another baby that only existed in their thoughts for now.

“I want another baby, Oliver,” Felicity told him, “and I know you want one too. So actually the question now is not if we should have another baby, but _when_ we should have another baby. Should we have one now or let a little more time pass? The more I think about it, the more I think we should do it now. Right now I am sure that I want a baby, and I feel like we should use the fact that I am so certain of that now before I change my mind.”

“I think if you are scared that you will change your mind again, maybe it’s a sign that you aren’t ready.”

Felicity sighed, shaking her head. “No. I think it’s only a sign that I am overthinking things too much. At some point I guess we should just close our eyes and jump into it.”

Oliver squeezed her fingers once more, watching her face closely. He was almost surprised that he was this hesitant about agreeing on another baby now. He had thought the moment Felicity would give the go they would go at it like rabbits because ever since the last time they had thought she was pregnant the thought hadn’t left his mind. Now that he was so close the reality of what they might have to endure stopped him from just doing it.

“When John told me that he and Lyla were trying for a baby, my first thought was that it’s a pity we never did that,” Oliver explained. “With Emmy and Tommy it just happened. We weren’t really careful with protection and – boom! – you were pregnant.”

“Boom?” Felicity asked.

Oliver chuckled. “Yes, kind of. I just figured that we never really sat down and said we should try for a baby. We just let it happen.”

“So you are in for having another baby?” Felicity asked.

“Only if you are really sure that you are ready,” Oliver replied. Felicity was already about to answer when he quickly added, “Think about it for a moment. Close your eyes and really think about it.”

Felicity did as he had asked. She closed her eyes and thought about it. At least Oliver assumed that she was thinking about it. Her face didn’t let anything show. She wasn’t frowning or smiling or doing anything else that would make him know what she was thinking or feeling. That was good, though. No matter what the result was, at least he’d know that she had thought about it carefully.

Not opening her eyes, Felicity leaned forward and kissed Oliver. It was a gentle kiss that was reassuring in a way Oliver wasn’t sure what to take from it. Was it reassuring him that she was sure of having another baby or was it reassuring him that she loved him, but wasn’t ready for a baby yet, which he didn’t need to be assured of because he knew she loved him?

“I don’t think you can really make a baby with me, though.”

It took Oliver the beat of a second before he could make sense into her words. She wasn’t ready. This was her – covered with teasing and funniness – way of telling him that. He knew Felicity in his bones, and he knew that she often covered things that she didn’t like talking about with jokes because it was her way of dealing with it. Felicity wasn’t ready to have another baby, so she tried to joke her way around it instead of telling him directly.

It was okay, though. Oliver rather waited for her to be ready than push her into something that she wasn’t ready for. He could be patient. They had three perfect children and they had each other which was even more important. What they had, the family they had would be enough even if they decided to drop their wishes of another baby permanently.

He smiled and squeezed her hands, wordlessly telling her that it was okay, before he responded to her teasing.

“I think three kids should be enough to prove you wrong.”

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. She put her fingers to his shoulders, gently massaging the tight muscle there while shaking her head. “Those three kids have all been the results of accidents or not being careful or whatever. You never knocked someone up on purpose.”

Oliver bit his tongue. “I could do it.”

“Oh, really?” Felicity asked.

“Of course.”

“So you wouldn’t feel pressured at all? You wouldn’t feel pressured about not knocking me up right now? What if you fail?”

“Ouch.” Oliver put his hand to his heart, acting hurt. “Insulting my manhood is not nice.”

“Awww! Poor baby,” Felicity replied, patting his thigh playfully.

“Oh, wait until I am going to prove you wrong.”

“Oh, really?” Felicity asked.

Oliver winked to make sure Felicity knew they were still playing this teasing game. He then turned them around and lay Felicity down on the bed, resting his own body on top of her smaller one. He pressed his lips to her pulse point, gently sucking at her sensitive skin before he moved his lips to her cleavage.

He wondered if she was right and he would feel pressured if they had decided to try for a baby. It was like she had said. If he wouldn’t knock her up, it would be like failing her. He should probably be glad that he didn’t have to worry about that at least not for the next time.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked.

Oliver bit his tongue to keep himself from smiling. His thoughts had taken his attention from what he was doing, so he had started peppering probably slightly awkward kisses to her collar bone. With an almost dramatic sigh he rolled himself off of Felicity.

“You’re right. I can’t do it,” he said, taking her hand and linking their fingers, while staring at the ceiling. He sighed. “I hate it when you’re right.”

Felicity didn’t reply. She didn’t even chuckle or tease him about it. Oliver turned his head, seeing that she was frowning slightly with her lips pursed. He was just about to ask her if she was alright when Felicity turned her head to look at him with a smile.

“Want to have sex just like that?”

Oliver chuckled. “Always.”

Without any hesitation he rolled himself back on top of Felicity and kissed her. She sighed into the kiss, giving him the opportunity to deepen it. He stroked his tongue against hers, and pushed his arms beneath her body to pull her closer against him. He poured all the love he had for her into this kiss and reassured her that they were fine. He hoped she knew already, but it never hurt making sure of that.

They weren’t having another baby anytime soon, but that was okay. They had talked about it, and they were both clear on where they stood regarding that subject right now. They were both on the same side in this and that was all that mattered. Everything else time would tell.


	156. The hard times of parenting?

“Here you go,” Oliver whispered, lying Tommy down in his crib.

The boy looked at him with tired eyes, yawning behind his pacifier. Smiling, Oliver stroked his hand over Tommy’s dark hair. The little boy had been running around all morning. Hopefully that meant he was tired enough to start napping soon, Oliver thought while he was leaning down pressing a kiss to his son’s forehead.

“Dada,” Tommy said with from the pacifier muffled voice.

“Sleep tight, buddy.”

Slowly Oliver turned around and walked to the door. He had just taken the first step out of Tommy’s nursery when the boy sat up in his crib. He quickly took his pacifier out of his mouth and looked at Oliver with wide eyes.

“Dada?”

Oliver smiled slightly. At some point in the last months Tommy had started adapting Felicity’s former habit of doing a Please-don’t-go-dance with him whenever he was about to leave. While it had been difficult and heartbreaking with Felicity, it was easy and cute with Tommy because he wasn’t really leaving him. After he had stayed with his son the first few times, unsure of what else to do but waiting until he had fallen asleep, Oliver had found a way to solve this situation differently.

“Daddy’s just going downstairs to see what Emmy’s doing.”

“Emmy?” Tommy asked.

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a smile. “Emmy’s downstairs. Daddy just takes a look at what she is doing. You just lie back down and close your eyes, okay? Daddy’s going to be back soon. I’ll leave the door ajar.”

Tommy looked at him for a long moment, but eventually he put the pacifier back between his lips and lay back down in the crib. He turned around onto his side with his most tired sigh. If he hadn’t known before, at least now Oliver knew that Tommy would definitely fall asleep soon.

Just like he had promised Oliver left the door ajar, so a little light still shed into the room. On his way downstairs he held the baby monitor to his ear. Smiling, he realized that Tommy’s breathing was already evening out. The little boy was probably asleep before Oliver had made it down the stairs.

He loved days like this when it was all easy. Tommy could get quite upset before napping. He reacted better when Felicity was the one to put him to bed at the weekend or whenever she could take a day off. Tommy was just a little mama’s boy. Felicity was working, though, so they had done their usual video call during her lunch break before Oliver had given Emmy Felicity’s old tablet to play with while he was taking Tommy to bed. The next one to two hours until Tommy would wake up would be all Emmy-and-daddy-time.

“Hey, Sweetie,” Oliver said, sitting down on the back of the couch behind Emmy and leaning down to kiss the crown of her head. “Tommy’s asleep now. Should we bake something to surprise mommy when she comes home from work?”

Baking was Emmy’s and his thing. She loved helping in the kitchen, and Oliver just enjoyed seeing the proud look on her face when she told her mommy that she helped making dinner.

“Not now,” Emmy replied, not even looking up from the game she was playing on Felicity’s old tablet.

“Tablet-time is over, though,” Oliver explained to her. “Switch if off please.

“Not yet.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“I’m playing a game.”

“Well, and I am saying you switch the tablet off now,” Oliver told his daughter, but again she didn’t look up. “Emmy, I am not going to say it again. You will switch the tablet off now.”

Emmy didn’t react. She continued to play like he wasn’t there. With a low sigh Oliver reached out his hand to take the tablet from her. As soon as his fingers were in her field of view, she tried to slap them away, though.

“Daddy, no!”

“Okay, that’s it,” Oliver said.

Despite Emmy’s tries to keep the tablet, he took it from her hands and switched it off. Emmy protested loudly. She got up on her feet, so she was standing on the couch and reached out her arm to get the tablet back, but Oliver put it to the small table behind him that was out of his daughter’s reach. When he turned back around to her, he gently took her wrists in his hands.

“Emmy,” he said firmly.

“Give it back!”

“Emmy, listen to me,” he said.

He didn’t know if his voice had been too strict because Emmy seemed slightly taken aback. It didn’t last long, though. Only a second later she was looking at him with a pouting face.

“When I tell you that tablet-time is over, tablet-time is over,” Oliver told her, his voice now a little gentler than before. “I will go to the kitchen and start making dessert for mommy now. I want you to go to the stairs and sit down on the bottom step until my phone rings.”

Emmy’s pout increased a little bit as she crossed her arms in front of her chest. Oliver quickly set a two minute countdown on his phone and held it out for Emmy.

“You will start the countdown when you sit, and you won’t play with the phone while you are waiting,” he explained to her. “Understood?”

Still looking at him angrily, Emmy nodded. She took his phone, got off the couch and stomped off without looking at him once more. Oliver took in a deep breath. Why couldn’t parenting be only about spoiling the kids? It was so much more fun than educating them.

Slowly he walked to the kitchen, shooting a glance at Emmy on his way. She sat on the bottom step with her arms wrapped around her legs and her gaze lowered to the floor. His phone was put next to her on the step. He knew that she wouldn’t touch it as long as the time-out lasted. Emmy might be testing her limits, but she wouldn’t do that.

Cleaning the countertop, Oliver sent a short prayer to heaven that Emmy wouldn’t be too mad at him. He knew that the time-out had been the right choice and he couldn’t just spoil her as he loved to do. Parenting included more than that. Oliver just didn’t like when his relationship to his kids were tense even if only for a short time, and Emmy was a master of pouting. She could go a whole hour without talking to him.

When he had told Donna about that the last time she had been here, she had laughed at him for thinking one hour was much. Apparently once little girls turned into teenagers they could be even more unforgiving. According to Donna Felicity had been able to spent days ignoring her completely. Days! Oliver had trouble getting through that one hour already.

The beeping sound of his phone, telling him that the two minutes were over, startled him out of his thoughts. Staying where he was, he tried to listen into the hallway to figure out what Emmy was doing. After the alarm was switched off, a moment of silence followed. Then Oliver heard quick steps coming closer.

Quickly Oliver opened a wall cupboard and took one of the bowls from it, so he looked busy and like he was in the middle of the preparations for making the dessert when Emmy stepped into the kitchen. She didn’t hesitate and came running right towards him.

“Here’s your phone, Daddy,” she told him, holding out his phone for him.

“Thanks, sweetie,” Oliver replied, taking it from her and pushing it into the back pocket of his jeans.

There was silence for a long moment before Emmy leaned a little closer. “Daddy?”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry,” Emmy whispered, leaning her head against the side of his chest and looking up at him with wide eyes. “Do you still love me?”

“Of course I do,” Oliver replied. He quickly put the bowl away and lifted Emmy into his arms. “I will always love you.”

“I love you too,” Emmy replied.

She wrapped her arms around his neck tightly and hid her face against the side of his neck. Oliver sighed quietly, closing his eyes for a moment. If that was what he got for sending her into time-out, he would do it again anytime. When Emmy pulled pack a little, she put her little hands to his cheeks and kissed his lips.

“Hey, what’s going on here?”

“Mommy!”

Emmy wiggled in Oliver’s arms until he set her back to the floor. As soon as her naked feet touched the tiles, she started running towards Felicity and jumped up at her, so her arms were wrapped around her mother’s neck and her legs pressed to her mother’s side. Felicity chuckled.

“Now that is how I like to be welcomed home.”

Smiling, Oliver went over to her and pecked her lips shortly. “You’re home early. I thought you wouldn’t come back before dinner.”

“I decided to call it a day and come back to spend time with my family,” Felicity replied.

“Glad to hear that,” Oliver said and pecked her lips once more.

“We just wanted to make dessert for you,” Emmy told Felicity, leaning back in her mother’s arms and looking at Oliver. “Right, Daddy?”

“Very right,” Oliver replied, “and we all know what that means.”

“Mommy’s not allowed in the kitchen,” Emmy said with a nod of her head.

“And I took this over work.” Felicity rolled her eyes, but then shrugged her shoulders. “In that case I will take a bath.”

She nuzzled Emmy’s nose before putting her daughter back to the floor. Emmy ran towards the fridge to get what they needed already. Oliver meanwhile stepped in front of Felicity and wrapped his arms around her waist.

“Everything alright at work?” he asked.

Felicity nodded. “Sure. It’s more than alright actually which is why I decided to go home already. If I had known that I am not wanted here, though-“

“Hey, we always want you home,” Oliver replied with a smile. “Just not in the kitchen.”

Felicity boxed his chest playfully. “Well, in that case I will go take a bath all alone.”

Oliver groaned, watching her leave. That really wasn’t fair. Well, at least he had Emmy to distract him from what Felicity was doing upstairs, he thought, turning around to his daughter. “Let’s get this started, right?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't miss tomorrow's update! It's a good one!


	157. A misunderstanding

Oliver had just turned around to head back to the hotel when he felt his phone vibrating in the pocket of his pants. Quickly he pulled it out and smiled when he saw Felicity’s sleepy face smiling at him on the screen. He had taken the photo the day only a couple of days ago and immediately saved it as her contact photo on his phone.

“Hi, hon,” Oliver said as soon as he had taken the video call. “I was just about to call you.”

“So Samantha and William are on their way to San Francisco now?” Felicity asked.

“They just left,” Oliver replied, nodding his head.

“It’s quite late in Central City already. Is it a good idea that they didn’t wait until tomorrow?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Samantha wanted to get over with the first miles already.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “And I see that you are all sweaty?”

Chuckling, Oliver looked down at him, noticing the slight sweat stains on his shirt. “Looks like I am, yes. I am on my way back to the hotel now. I will take a quick shower and then meet Barry.”

“Barry?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied. “I decided since I am here until tomorrow morning anyway, I can also use the opportunity of being here to go and see a friend, right?”

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied with a nod of her head. She leaned back a little, smiling at him. “I can’t wait to have you back with me, though.”

Oliver chuckled. “Felicity, I just left this morning.”

Felicity puckered her lips. “And because it’s only a few hours, I can’t miss you already? When did that happen? You used to miss me as soon as you had left the house, and now you don’t even miss me when being away for hours?”

“I do miss you,” Oliver admitted with a sigh.

He really missed her. During the last hours since he had come here to help Samantha and William with the last things that had to be done for their moving to San Francisco he had been too busy to really realize that. Between packing the moving van and making sure Samantha and William hadn’t forgotten anything important there hadn’t been much time to miss Felicity. Now that he had done what he had come here for, though, he realized that he indeed missed her. He already feared the night. He never slept well without Felicity by his side.

“What are you going to do today?”

“Nothing,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “I will just be here and be bored.”

Oliver chuckled at the face she made while saying that. “What about the kids? I am sure they find ways to distract you.”

“Thea took them.”

“She took them?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied. “She just came in and said she was going to take them and bring them back tomorrow. So here I am, all alone and bored.”

“I could come home already,” Oliver suggested.

Felicity smiled. “No, you go and meet Barry. I will find something to do. Maybe I will do a movie marathon, eat pizza and… I don’t know… There have to be ways to chase away the boredom, right?”

Oliver chuckled, nodding his head. “I certainly hope so.”

Taking in a deep breath, he watched her face closely. Felicity looked relaxed and oh-so-beautiful. As far as he could see she was lying on their bed with her head propped up onto her hand. She looked at him with a smile, not saying a word. They didn’t have to say anything, though. Oliver loved how they could spend quiet moments like this one even over the phone when they were miles apart from each other.

“Actually I think the sooner you find ways to chase away boredom, the better,” Oliver said after a while, “because I hope there is a lot boredom coming our way.”

Felicity frowned. “What do you mean?”

Oliver smiled. “You know, I have been thinking a lot about the last one and a half years lately. First you and the kids got kidnapped. Then William stepped into our life and that whole drama took its course. Now the last months have been quieter, but there was still a lot going on, right? First your mom moved to Staring, now William and Samantha are moving to San Francisco. Wouldn’t it be nice to just have a year where nothing big happened? I think a year full of boredom would be nice now, wouldn’t it?”

He smiled, waiting for Felicity to nod and tell him how right he was. He knew that the last one and a half years had been a lot for her to take too. It was only logical that she was looking forward to a year where nothing happened as much as he did. Felicity didn’t agree with him, though. Instead she stayed unmoving with a blank expression on her face. Oliver tapped the display, thinking it had frozen.

“Hon?” he asked. “Everything alright? You look like you just had a stroke.”

Felicity chuckled a little insecurely. Lowering her gaze, she played with the hem of her shirt and bit down on her bottom lip. Oliver frowned at the sight, feeling a little bit of worry arising inside of him.

“Uhm…” Felicity made, looking back up at the display of her own phone. She frowned slightly though she chuckled insecurely once more. “What about our baby plans?”

Oliver smiled gently. “Do you remember how a few weeks before Emmy’s first birthday we thought you were pregnant, but it turned out to be false alarm?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “But what does that have to do with this situation?”

“Well, back then we agreed that it was too soon for another baby anyway,” he explained, “and I saved that appointment in your phone, saying we were going to make a baby one year later. Now we decided that we aren’t ready for another baby yet, so we should just let some time pass and not think about that any more. I think we should handle it like we handled thinking about a second pregnancy. When I will come home, I will save an appointment in your phone, saying that we will talk about a third baby one year from now. That way we have a whole year that we can just take to think about another baby before we start talking about whether or not we will do anything about it. I think that is a good idea.”

Felicity looked at him with her eyebrows perked up. Oliver couldn’t say what it was, but something about the look on her face unsettled him. It was something he didn’t understand, probably because it really didn’t look like Felicity was going to tell him that this was a good idea. But why wouldn’t she think that?

Oliver had put a lot of thought into that, and he felt like it really was a good idea. With the appointment set for the next year they would both know that there was no pressure to talk about it sooner than that. They could take their time and think about it carefully before discussing it once more. They both knew they wanted another baby now. They just needed time to be ready to take that step. Letting a year pass before discussing whether it was the right time once more felt like a reasonable plan for Oliver.

“Oliver, have you bumped your head?”

“What?” Oliver asked back, frowning.

“Did you bump your head?” Felicity repeated. “Or did you take drugs? Are you high?”

“What?” Oliver only repeated.

“When in the world did we decide that we aren’t ready for another baby?”

Oliver’s frown deepened. “A few days after Tommy’s birthday?”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow, looking at him like she was doubting his sanity. “No, we didn’t.”

“Of course we did,” Oliver replied immediately. “You told me you were thinking about another baby. I told you that I was doing the same. We had a long talk about what risks there are if we have another and whether or not now was the time.”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “Then I told you that maybe we just have to close our eyes and jump into it instead of overthinking it.”

“Right.” Oliver’s steps slowed down until they came to a stop. “I told you to close your eyes and really think about it for a moment. You did so, kissed me and then told me that I couldn’t even make a baby with you because I would feel pressured. That was your way of telling me that you are not ready.”

“No, no, no,” Felicity replied, shaking her head vehemently. She sat up in bed. Her face on the screen of his phone blurred for a moment while she was moving her own phone. When her face came back into focus again, she was frowning at him. “You told me to close my eyes. I thought about it and gave you a reassuring Yes-I-am-sure-kiss. Then I figured that all this serious talk is not really the right way to start making a baby, so I decided to lighten the mood, and what’s better than teasing you about how your manhood could possibly fail us? It was perfect to get to the baby-making part of the night because we both know that you get very eager about proving me wrong when I insult your manhood.”

“I thought it was your way of telling me that you aren’t ready.”

“But it wasn’t!” Felicity told him, shaking her head. She looked at a moment before she started frowning. “So you being all awkward about sleeping with me at first-“

“-was my way of respecting your wishes. I thought if that is your way of telling me you are not ready, I will just go with it and confirm your doubt in my manhood.”

“But we had sex nonetheless.”

“Yes,” Oliver replied, “just sex, but no baby-making.”

“It was just a different name for doing the same, Oliver,” Felicity explained. “You felt pressured when we said we were making a baby, so we just had sex.”

“Yes, exactly. We had sex, just sex.”

“Unprotected sex,” Felicity specified. “I stopped taking the pill. I thought if you couldn’t make a baby with me, we would just give it a different name and take the pressure away by saying we are just letting it happen like we did with Emmy and Tommy. The bottom line was still the same for me, though. We are working on a third baby.”

Oliver opened his mouth to say something, but he was unable to form a word. His thoughts were running wild. Oliver recalled the memory of that night in the light of this new knowledge. The way Felicity put it made sense. She had been so sure of being ready that he had almost been a little bit surprised that she had decided against it at the end. He had just been so focused on making sure she was okay that he hadn’t put much thought into it. Felicity hadn’t told him she was ready after that kiss, so he had thought she wasn’t.

They were staring at each other over their phones, both realizing that they had talked at really crossed purposes that night. If it hadn’t been for his plan of a year of boredom, they might have continued with that misunderstanding until… It took Oliver a long moment until he realized what that actually meant. He bit down on his tongue to hide the smile that threatened to spread on her face.

“So we will continue to keep letting it happen like you said it so nicely?”

“No.”

“No?” Oliver replied, frowning slightly. “Is it because of what I said about a year of boredom or-?”

“We won’t continue to keep letting it happen,” Felicity interrupted him, “because we already did let it happen.”

“What?”

Felicity breathed out a laugh, nodding her head. “Oliver, I’m pregnant.”

The wide smile that spread on Oliver’s lips almost hurt his entire face. His heart beat quickly against his ribs. It almost felt like it was trying to jump of his body to joyfully dance around here on the street. Oliver tried to figure out when was the last time he had been this happy. He was happy with the life they had, but knowing that their family would expand was just…

He loved babies. He loved having and raising babies with Felicity and-

“Hon? It would be nice if you could say something,” Felicity’s soft voice startled him out of his thoughts. “I mean your smile is nice, but in the light of our latest misunderstanding I think I need some words to make sure I am interpreting that smile correctly.”

Oliver chuckled. “I am happy. I am very, very happy.”

Felicity smiled. “Good. So am I.”

Quickly Oliver started walking again, continuing his way to the hotel. “I wish I was home now, so I could lift you against me and twirl you around until we were both dizzy. I can’t really tell you how happy this makes me. I would much rather show you because at least that would tell you a lot better how happy I really am.”

“Don’t worry,” Felicity replied with a wide smile. “If you could see the smile on your face, you’d know that I believe you when you tell me that you are happy.”

“I still wish I was with you, the two of you,” Oliver replied.

“I actually wanted to wait with taking the test until you are here,” Felicity told him with a sigh, “but then Thea took the kids, and I started sneaking around that test that I bought. I really tried to stay strong, but I couldn’t wait any longer. I wanted to surprise you with the news when you are back home. I prepared a-“

Suddenly the screen froze and a terrible noise covered Felicity’s voice. Oliver took a step back, trying to get a better signal.

“Felicity?”

“Oliver?”

“Felicity, I think the-“

The battery sign on the screen started blinking in red three times before the battery died.

“Great,” Oliver said with a groan, but still couldn’t stop smiling.

He quickly pushed the phone into the back pocket of his jeans and started jogging towards the hotel, the smile on his face never wavering. They were really having a baby.

 

 

It was almost three o’clock in the morning when Oliver finally unlocked the front door of his home. He closed the door behind him as quietly as possible, putting his keys to the bowl on the small table next to the door and slipped off his shoes. He had left his bag in the trunk of his car, deciding that he could still get it later today.

Right now all Oliver wanted was to sneak upstairs where Felicity was probably sleeping peacefully in their bed, so he could watch her for a while before he would welcome their unborn baby into the family. Since his phone had died, it was all he had been able to think about. Being home with Felicity and their unborn baby was all he wanted right now.

He tiptoed upstairs towards their bedroom and quietly opened the door. He hadn’t even taken one step into the room yet when he could already make out her sleeping form on the bed. Pressing his lips together to keep himself from chuckling, he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. He never took his eyes off Felicity who wore one of his shirts. She was lying across the mattress with her legs spread, his pillow on her face and one of her arms put across it. If the weird position was any indication, she hadn’t fallen asleep easily.

He tiptoed to the bed, crouching down in front of it to level his face with the mattress and just watched Felicity. He couldn’t see her face under her pillow, and most of her body was hidden by the white fabric of his shirt. Yet Oliver didn’t doubt that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. The weird position of her body only made her look more adorable.

Slowly Oliver’s gaze moved from the pillow on her face down over her chest, which raised and fell with her even breaths, and further down to her stomach. Of course there wasn’t anything to see yet, but Oliver couldn’t wait for the moment when the pregnancy would show. The bump would grow until his shirt would start spanning around it.

Oliver was as quiet as he could when he straightened back up again. He put one knee to the mattress and carefully crawled onto the bed and lay down, so his face was hovering right over Felicity’s stomach. Slowly he started unbuttoning the shirt to reveal Felicity’s naked skin to him. When she made a quiet sound, Oliver turned his head towards her. She didn’t stir, though, and she didn’t wake up.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake Felicity. “I’m your daddy.”

He lowered his head slowly and pressed a gentle kiss to Felicity’s skin. She sighed and moved a little before she became motionless once more.

“You know, if mommy was awake, she would tell me that you can’t hear me yet,” Oliver said with a quiet sigh, “so I figured it was best talking to you as long as she is asleep, right?”

He shot a gaze up Felicity’s body. She still wasn’t moving. Under the pillow it was hard to tell, but Oliver was almost sure that she was snoring a little. He smiled, biting his tongue for a moment, before he focused his attention back onto her stomach.

“Mommy told me about you only a few hours ago,” Oliver continued, “and I can’t stop smiling ever since. You have no idea how much I am looking forward to finally meet you. There is no rush, though. You have all the time in the world, and you should take some long months before making your appearance here. Take your time and grow inside of mommy until you are ready to leave that safe place and come into the world. It’s a much more dangerous place than where you are right now, but of course you will have people looking out for you. We will pick godparents for you who will keep you safe and protected. You have your siblings, who will love you so much and make sure you will never feel alone and always have someone to play with. You have mommy, who is the best person you can have in your life. She really is the best. She will keep you safe as long as you need it, especially as long as you are still growing inside of her.”

He kissed Felicity’s lower stomach once more, letting his lips linger against her soft skin for a moment. When he lifted his head away, it was only enough, so he could speak even more quietly.

“And of course you have me,” he whispered. “I love you so much, and I will do everything I can to always keep you safe. Mommy and I are trying to make this city a better and safer place already, but with you… with you I have one more reason to put effort into that. I want this city to be a safe place for you to grow up. So you have the love of your family and the safety of this city surrounding you while in your childhood.”

He nuzzled Felicity’s stomach with his nose, breathing in the scent of her skin. She smelled like lavender, which probably came from her body lotion. Her skin was soft against his nose.

“I just want you to know that I am really doing everything in my power to protect you because I love you already. I love you so much, baby.”

He pressed another kiss to her stomach, gently brushing his lips against her skin and inhaling the scent of it once more.

 

“You do know that the baby can’t hear you yet, right?”

Oliver shot a short glance at Felicity, who had taken the pillow away from her face and put it under her head instead. She smiled at him with an expression of love in her eyes. Chuckling, Oliver put his flat hand onto her stomach and gently stroked his rough fingertips against her soft skin. He kissed her stomach once more before he rested his cheek against it.

“I told you mommy was going to say this, didn’t I, baby?” Oliver asked their baby while locking eyes with Felicity.

She slowly moved her hand to rest against his cheek and stroked her fingertips through his stubble. For a long moment she just smiled at him, not saying a word. Oliver took her wrist and moved it to his lips to kiss the palm. When he moved her hand back to his cheek, he closed his eyes and just enjoyed the intimate moment of quiet.

“I thought you were only coming later today,” Felicity whispered after a while.

“After that news,” Oliver replied and turned his head to kiss Felicity’s stomach once more, “I just ran back to the hotel, packed my back and took a taxi to the airport. I didn’t even take the time to charge my phone because I wanted to be back home as soon as possible. It took a few hours because of a thunderstorm, but here I am now.”

“Here you are now,” Felicity replied with a smile. “What about Barry, though?”

“Who cares about Barry?” Oliver asked with a chuckle. “I called him and canceled the evening. I am where I need to be.”

Felicity smiled lovingly. “I am glad that you are.”

“No place I’d rather be.”

Felicity smiled at him wordlessly for about a minute longer before she asked, “Disappointed that you don’t get to have your year of boredom just yet?”

Not breaking eye contact with her, he moved to lie on top of her. He stayed propped up onto his forearms while his hands gently played with some strands of her hair.

“I’d take a baby over boredom every time,” Oliver assured her.

“Well, you will only get to take a baby over boredom this one time, though,” Felicity replied. “Right?”

Oliver smiled. “All four nurseries will be filled, so I guess you’re right.”

“Did you think we would really fill all four nurseries when you designed this home for us?”

“No,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, “at least not with children. I thought we’d quit after the second child.”

“Then we got William.”

“And now we will have one more,” Oliver added, nodding his head. “Felicity, I hope you know that you are making me the happiest man on the face of the earth.”

Felicity looked at him with her breath getting caught in her throat slightly at his confession of love. Her fingers moved over his back, softly scratching him through the fabric of his shirt. When the corners of her lips twitched slightly, she lifted her head from the pillow and kissed Oliver. Her lips brushed against his twice before they pressed down a little bit more firmly. Oliver sighed into the kiss, opening his lips to hers. His hand moved to her face, gently stroking her cheek with the knuckles of his hand.

When his lips moved to her jaw, Felicity yawned. Oliver pulled back with a chuckle.

“Tired?”

“It’s the middle of the night,” Felicity replied, yawning once more, “and I was asleep when you got here. Of course I am tired.”

“In that case I suggest we just snuggle up to each other and catch some sleep.”

“Good idea,” Felicity replied, yawning once more. Oliver was already about to find the perfect position to be as close to Felicity as possible and be able to sleep at the same time when Felicity added, “First you have to take a look at your nightstand, though.”

“On my nightstand?” Oliver asked, shooting a short gaze to it. “Why?”

“Well, what I was about to tell you before the line broke was that since you weren’t present while I took the test, I wanted to surprise you with the result of it when you came home,” Felicity told him. “I prepared something on your nightstand for that.”

“Although I know about it already?”

“I prepared it before our phone call already. As soon as I saw the result, I wanted to tell you. I have no idea how women can keep something like that for long. My immediate reaction was thinking that you would positively freak out about this news. I really didn’t want to tell you on the phone, though. Of course it came differently,” Felicity told him, slightly rolling her eyes. “Anyway, you have to look at it now.”

Oliver got up on his hands and knees to crawl to the edge of the mattress, looking at the nightstand. As well as he could see in the dark of the room, he couldn’t see much of what was on the nightstand. The little light that fell into the room from the window wasn’t enough for that.

“Okay, I think I need to switch on the light for that,” he said.

He heard Felicity pulling the pillow back over her face right before he switched the light on. The brightness of it hurt his eyes for a short moment, and he had to squeeze his eyes shut. He was able to open his eyes again soon, though.

There were five baby pins on the nightstand – two big ones, two medium ones and a small one inside of one of the big ones. That was their family - the two of them with Emmy and Tommy and a baby growing inside of Felicity. Smiling, he took the sight in for a long moment before he switched the light off and crawled back to Felicity.

“Thank you,” he whispered, taking the pillow from her face and throwing it somewhere behind him. “It’s beautiful.”

“Unfortunately I only had two medium sized baby pins,” Felicity replied sleepily, moving her hands over Oliver’s chest, “but given that you knew already anyway, I decided to quit my plan to buy another one for William and spend the day in front of the TV instead.”

Oliver chuckled. “Like I said it’s perfect.”

He pulled Felicity closer, holding her against him tightly.

“Don’t you want to undress first?” Felicity asked. “I mean… get out of your pants and shirt? It would be much comfier.”

“Do you want to get me out of my clothes?” Oliver asked with a chuckle.

“We both know I do,” Felicity replied with a chuckle of her own. “Naked you is my favorite you.”

“Luckily, I guess,” Oliver answered, moving his hand to her lower stomach, “because that brought us this, right?”

Felicity smiled at him in the dark. “Yes.”

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her softly. He nibbled at her bottom lip before opening her lips to his tongue and exploring the inside of her mouth. He loved how she sighed into the kiss, moving her hand into his hair to pull him closer. When their lips parted, she snuggled her face to his biceps, using it as a pillow for her head. Oliver pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead before resting his chin on the crown of her head.

“Thank you for everything you give me,” he whispered. “I didn’t know what my life would be without you. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Felicity replied with a sigh, snuggling herself even closer to him, “very much actually.”

Once they had found their perfect positions with Oliver’s arms wrapped around Felicity tightly and her body pressed against his safely, it didn’t take long until they fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, get the champagne ready to welcome QueenBaby #3 into the family!


	158. Three is a magic number

_We’re having a baby! We’re having a baby! We’re having a baby!_

The singsong had been going on and on in his head for the last two and a half weeks now. Since the day he had helped Samantha and William with moving to San Francisco and Felicity had told him that they were expecting their third baby, he had barely been able to think about anything but this.

They were having a baby!

Some people might think that the excitement would decrease with each pregnancy. He had already experienced the feelings and adventures of expecting a baby. It wasn’t something new, so why getting overly excited? For Oliver it wasn’t like that, though. He was still as excited as he had been the last two times. It still felt as new as if he was experiencing this the first time.

When he realized that his thumb was rubbing against the fingertips of the same hand, he quickly took Felicity’s hand from her knee. Holding her fingers between both of his hands, he lifted her hand to his lips and gently kissed her knuckles. He continued to hold onto her hand, feeling the contact of her skin against his calming him down a little.

Only few minutes were separating him from seeing their baby for the first time. He had been looking forward to this doctor appointment for days now. The closer it was coming, the more excited and maybe even slightly nervous he got. Seeing the baby for the first time was just making it so much realer than Felicity’s words or the two pink lines on the test had managed to do. When they were called into the examination room, they were going to see their baby. Of course he or she would be small and probably not recognizable as a baby yet, but it would be their baby nonetheless.

“Oliver?” Felicity’s soft voice pulled him from his thoughts.

Oliver turned his head and looked at her with a smile, finding her eyes on him already. She had an eyebrow perked up slightly and though she seemed to be trying to hide it, Felicity was smiling at him. She was only more beautiful when she was pregnant, even if so early the pregnancy of course didn’t show yet.

“Can you please try to smile a little less?” Felicity whispered.

“Why?” Oliver asked, squeezing her hand. “I’m happy. Can’t I show this?”

Felicity smiled, gently putting her hand to Oliver’s cheek. She moved her fingertips through his stubble while carefully eyeing up his face. Her gaze moved from his eyes down to his lips and back up again slowly. When their eyes locked once more, Felicity grinned.

“You look like you are on drugs.”

Oliver chuckled. “No drugs. Just happiness.”

“Well, happy you is my favorite you,” Felicity replied.

Smiling, she leaned over and pecked his lips gently. With a quiet sigh she rested her head on his shoulder. Oliver rested his cheek against her head, closing his eyes for a moment.

After Tommy had been born a little more than two years ago, he really hadn’t thought they were going to have another baby again. Felicity had been so against it at that time because of the trauma of the depression that he hadn’t been sure if she would ever change her mind. He was glad that she had done so, though. He really thought it was the right thing for both of them. Besides, after finding out about William whose first years of life he had missed out on, he cherished the chance to be part of a child’s life from the very beginning even more.

“Mrs. Queen?”

At the voice of the doctor’s assistant, Felicity looked up. “Yes.”

The doctor’s assistant gestured for them to follow her. While getting up and following the woman out of the waiting room, Oliver lifted Felicity’s hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles once more. Felicity turned her head, smiling at him, and squeezed his fingers in response.

“Dr. Hampton will be here any minute,” the doctor’s assistant said, opening the door to one of the examination rooms for them and gesturing them to get in.

While Felicity and Oliver sat down on the chairs in front of the desk, still holding hands, the doctor’s assistant put a file on the desk and then left them alone.

Oliver stroked his thumb over the knuckles of Felicity’s hand gently, not saying a word. He remembered how nervous he had been when he had been here with Felicity after she had opened up to him about the depression. He also remembered how miserable she had looked that day. When he turned his head to look at Felicity now, he saw Felicity biting down on her bottom lip nervously.

“Everything alright?”

Felicity turned her head to him with a reassuring smile. “Yes, it’s-“

“Don’t say nothing,” Oliver interrupted her, cocking his head. It brought a little smile to Felicity’s lips. He was sure that she could remember the first time he had said those words as well as he could. Comfortingly squeezing her hand, he asked, “Please tell me what’s going on.”

“I’m just…” Felicity started before she turned around to him a little bit more on her chair to face him. “Aren’t you nervous?”

“Of course I am,” Oliver replied, “but you look rather worried than just nervous.”

“I’m just scared something could be wrong,” Felicity whispered. Taking in a breath, she quickly shook her head. “I’m just preparing myself that something might be wrong because last time I felt so miserable, and this time I am fine, so there has to be something else going wrong and…  I might freak out from time to time in the next months. Sorry.”

“There is no need to apologize. You have me when you freak out,” Oliver promised. “And I might freak out from time to time, too.”

Felicity smiled back at him. “Well, you have me when that happens.”

“I know,” Oliver replied in a whisper. He leaned in and kissed Felicity gently. “Ready to see our triplets now?”

“Triplets?” Felicity asked.

“Yes. You remember when you had that dreams about having triplets shortly after Tommy was born? I think it was a sign.”

“A sign?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a wide smile. “I got a feeling that we’ll have triplets.”

Felicity stared at him for a moment. “You do know that triplets mean three kids, yes?”

“Three is a magic number,” Oliver explained. “Three drops of blood fall onto the snow at the beginning of _Snow White,_ and three colors are chosen for her – red, white and black. The evil Queen also visits her three times when she tries to poison her. Rumpelstiltskin spins three times for the future Queen, and he lets her guess his name three times over a period of three days. Scrooge is visited by three different ghosts. And that’s only few examples.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows, cocking her head a little. Her staring intensified.

Oliver cleared his throat, stating, “I’ve read bedtime stories to our daughter for years now. I do remember some things.”

“You remember a lot of things.”

Oliver smiled. “Triplets. Just think about it. Three little babies.”

“Three times as much crying and three times as many diapers than with one baby.”

“Well, three times as much work, but at least that means it’s also three times as much fun.”

“I doubt that triplets are three times as much fun, and I actually think it might be more than three times as much work.”

Oliver chuckled. “You would enjoy it.”

“We would never get sleep again,” Felicity replied

“Who needs sleep?”

“What about sex? No time for that either I guess.”

“Well, who needs sex?”

Felicity’s gaze focused on his face. Her eyes narrowed slightly before she started nodding slowly and stated, “You’re trying to distract me.”

“Does it work?”

“Yes,” Felicity admitted with a chuckle. She leaned forward and kissed him. “Thank you.”

“Anything for you,” he reassured her, lifting her hand to his lips. He gently kissed her knuckles. “Feeling better now?”

“I’d feel better if we knew we weren’t expecting triplets.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed her once more. They looked at each other for a long moment, neither of them saying a word. It wasn’t until the door opened behind them that they turned their gazes away from each other.

“Mr. and Mrs. Queen,” Dr. Hampton said, stepping into the room with a friendly smile. “It’s nice to see you again.”

The doctor approached them and shook both of their hands before he sat down behind the desk and looked into the file his assistant had left there before. Dr. Hampton had taken care of them in the other two pregnancies too. Oliver had learned to trust him with Felicity and their unborn children.

Oliver waited patiently while Felicity and Dr. Hampton were talking. She answered the general questions about the first day of her last period, if there had been any pain or bleedings and how she was feeling. After that he took a look at the last results from the yearly screening she had had a few weeks ago. Oliver listened carefully, holding onto Felicity’s hand and stroking his thumb over her knuckles gently.

It took awhile until they finally got to the part Oliver had been waiting for. When Dr. Hampton asked them to move over to the examination table, Oliver quickly got up. He lowered the zipper of Felicity’s skirt when she asked him to and held her hand when she lay down for the examination.

“So, let’s take a look at your baby,” Dr. Hampton said with a smile.

“Oliver is very nervous about this,” Felicity stated, grinning at her husband. “He is trying to hide it. My hand might get broken in the process.”

“Sorry,” Oliver said quickly, easing the grip on her hand guiltily.

Felicity only smiled at him, though, and tightened her grip on him in return. “It’s fine.”

Oliver watched carefully as Dr. Hampton applied some gel to Felicity’s lower stomach. He looked at the both of them, asking them if they were ready. Only when they both assured them that they were, he started the ultrasound.

Oliver lifted Felicity’s hand to press the back of it against his chest. He was sure Felicity could feel how wildly his heart was beating. His other hand came to rest against the crown of her head, stroking over her hair gently. His eyes were focused on the screen, waiting for their baby to show.

Dr. Hampton moved the ultrasound transducer over Felicity’s stomach for a few seconds without anything happening. The shadows on the screen were blurry and nothing to see there. Then finally a throbbing sound could be heard.

“Is that-?”

“Yes,” Dr. Hampton replied to Oliver’s unasked question with a smile. “That’s your baby’s heartbeat. We have 140 beats per minute. The baby’s strong.”

Oliver watched the shadows on the screen for a moment, making out their baby. He could see the baby’s heart beating. The smile on his face widened. That was their baby and their baby’s heartbeat. It still amazed him as much as it had the first time that they had created this, Felicity and him together. When he was finally able to tear his gaze from the screen, he looked down at Felicity, finding her smiling at him already.

“We’re having a baby,” Felicity said.

“We’re having a baby,” Oliver repeated.

They smiled at each other without saying a word before Oliver leaned down and kissed Felicity gently. He put all the love and gratefulness into the kiss, wordlessly thanking her for giving him this. She had given him so much already. She had given her a life worth living and a home worth returning home to. She had given him a family that he trusted and loved. She had given him everything, and she still continued to give. When their lips parted, they smiled at each other again.

“We’re having a baby,” Felicity whispered once more. All of a sudden a frown appeared on her forehead and she quickly looked at Dr. Hampton. “It’s only one, right?”

While Oliver chuckled, Dr. Hampton looked at her in surprise. “Yes.”

“Oh, thank God,” Felicity said with a sigh, resting her head back again and looking at Oliver with a relieved smile. “We’re having a baby.”

Oliver smiled, stroking his fingers over her soft cheek. “Yes, we will.”

“And given that it is our third baby, three is still the magical number, right?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, absolutely.”


	159. Lazy mornings

When Felicity woke for the second time this morning, it was to the gentle touch of Oliver’s rough fingertips on the delicate skin of her back. She could feel goosebumps eliciting wherever he touched her. Felicity hummed in contentment, a soft smile forming on her lips.

“I love when you wake me up like this,” she mumbled. With a yawn audible in her voice she added, “Not that I appreciate being woken up at all.”

Oliver chuckled while his hand kept stroking up and down Felicity’s spine. “I didn’t hear you complain when I woke you up before either.”

Felicity turned her face into the pillow, smiling at the memory. Oliver had woken her by kissing, licking and nibbling at the side of her neck. As their clothes had come off, the kisses had grown in passion. Both still half asleep, they had enjoyed some lazy Sunday morning sex before going back to sleep again.

“How late is it?” Felicity asked while turning her face back to Oliver, still not opening her eyes, though.

“Almost noon,” Oliver replied. “I think the last time we spent all morning in bed with just the two of us was before Emmy was born.”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sleepy sigh. “I think it was when we gave the kids away for a night the last time. I love how your sister, my mom and Laurel are fighting over who gets to babysit. What other parents get to spend the whole morning in bed without the kids?”

Oliver chuckled quietly. “That might stop once baby number three is born. Who wants to babysit three kids?”

“Then we just separate them. One person takes Emmy and Tommy, and someone else takes the baby. And we keep having lazy Sunday morning sex.”

“I like the way you’re thinking Mrs. Queen.”

Felicity slowly wiggled her hips a little to stretch the aching muscles of her back. It made Oliver’s fingertips slide further down Felicity’s back onto her butt. Blinking through one eye, she looked at Oliver.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

Oliver smiled innocently. “Nothing.”

“Oh really?” Felicity asked, opening her second eye. She turned her head, so she could watch Oliver’s hand stroking over the curve of her ass. “And what’s your hand doing down there, Mister?”

“My hand has a life of its own,” Oliver simply replied. “I am not responsible for what it is doing.”

“Well, in that case I suggest you leave, so I can have some good time with your hand.”

“Hey, I might not be responsible for what it is doing, but I do have some influence on its actions,” Oliver replied with a smug grin.

“Oh, I think-“ Felicity started to answer, but her words were interrupted by a loud grumble of her stomach. “I think your hand needs to wait a little before it can continue.”

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast or lunch or whatever food at this time of the day is called like,” Felicity replied. “Do you think it’s a brunch?”

Oliver chuckled. “I think it is a brunch when I’ll make you some food that includes something that would count as breakfast and something that would count as lunch.”

Felicity smiled. “Well, now that you know what to do, what are you still doing in bed?”

“So you want me to do all the work while you will stay here in bed doing nothing?”

“Oliver, I am pregnant,” Felicity replied with a wide grin, stroking her hand over her lower stomach. “I shouldn’t exhaust myself, and getting out of bed when I am not feeling like it is definitely too much exhaustion for me to take right now.”

Smiling, Oliver put his hand to hers on her stomach and slid closer to her, so their chests were pressed against each other’s. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pecked her lips.

“Well, if it is better for you and the baby, of course you can stay in bed while I will take care of our brunch in bed,” Oliver told her with a knowing smile, leaving no doubt that he knew exactly that Felicity was using the pregnancy to get away with her Sunday morning laziness. “I’ll be back.”

He kissed Felicity once more and rolled away from her to get out of bed. He put on some boxer briefs and bent down to pick up the sweatpants he had neglected on the floor when they had gone to bed yesterday. Smiling, Felicity enjoyed the sight of his butt. If the wink Oliver gave her on the way to the door was any indication, he hadn’t missed it.

“Oh, Oliver!” Felicity quickly held him back when he was about to step out of the room. “Could you give me the shirt you took off me and threw across the room when you woke me up the first time?”

Oliver grinned smugly, bending down once more. He moved his ass a little, making sure she had the best sight, before he picked up the white fabric of his shirt and threw it right over her face

“Thank you,” Felicity said with a smile.

Not sitting up or anything, she started getting her arm into the long sleeve of Oliver’s shirt. When she realized that he hadn’t left, but was instead leaning in the doorframe and watching her, she cocked her head.

“Hey, I gave you a show with my butt, now I’d like a show with your boobs,” Oliver replied with a smug smile, crossing his arms in front of his broad chest. “It’s only fair. Besides, your already beautiful boobs are just so much prettier when you’re pregnant.”

“Oh, you’re saying?”

Oliver nodded. “And before you complain about me using your pregnancy for my best, you do the same. Come on, Felicity, let us both enjoy the perks of you being pregnant.”

“I guess since you are the one getting out of bed and making sure I am not going to starve, it’s only fair,” Felicity replied.

She sat up in bed, getting her right arm into the sleeve of the shirt. The seductive smile she had put on for Oliver froze on her lips when her stomach made a turn. For the break of a second she had black spots dancing in front of her eyes and a terrible taste spread in her mouth.

“Sexy boobs show is cancelled,” Felicity chocked out.

“What-?”

Oliver stopped when Felicity quickly got out of bed and ran into the bathroom. She kneeled down in front of the toilet and lifted the toilet lid just in time for whatever half-digested food to come back. She tried to hold her hair back, but the urge to gag and the way her stomach cramped made her hands tremble, so she had trouble taking hold of her hair.

Soon her hands were replaced by Oliver’s, though. He moved them over her head to grab the strands she had missed and held them behind her neck. His free hand rubbed up and down her back soothingly.

Felicity didn’t know how long it took for the cramps to be over. Her stomach hurt terribly. She felt exhausted, and her cheeks were wet from the tears that had fallen. She flushed the toilet and was about to get up to rinse out her mouth, but Oliver put his hands to her shoulders and gently pulled her against him, so her back was resting against his chest. He kissed her temple comfortingly.

“Sorry,” Felicity whispered, closing her eyes with a sigh.

“No need to apologize,” Oliver replied and kissed her temple once more. “Feeling dizzy?”

“Maybe a little,” Felicity admitted.

“Okay, stay sitting here for a moment,” Oliver told her before he slowly got up from behind her.

Felicity opened her eyes, watching him stepping to the sink. He took a washcloth from the cabinet, wetted it and held it out for her.

“Put that to your neck,” he suggested.

Felicity did as he said and put the cold washcloth to her neck. Sighing, she closed the eyes again. The cold wet helped with the heat that seemed to be radiating from her skin. Seconds later he whispered her name, making her open her eyes and finding him with her toothbrush in his hand.

“Thanks,” Felicity said, taking it from him.

She quickly brushed her teeth and then got up with Oliver’s help to rinse out her mouth. Oliver held onto her elbows while they were walking back into the bedroom. He made sure she was lying in bed safely, buttoned his shirt on her body and pecked her lips.

“I guess that is a pass on the food then?”

“No, I am still starving,” Felicity replied. “And now it’s even worse than before.”

Oliver chuckled. “I will make something easily digestible that hopefully won’t upset your stomach too much.”

Felicity smiled. “Sounds great.”

“Do you need anything before I go down?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “I will text Thea and check if the kids are behaving.”

“You mean you want to check if they already fell into a sugar coma.”

Felicity chuckled. “Yes, probably.”

Oliver pecked her lips once more before he left her alone. Felicity sank further down into the pillows, taking her phone from the nightstand and texting her sister-in-law.

F: _Hey, how are the kids doing?_

It didn’t take ten seconds for Thea to answer.

T: _Great! We had some trouble with Tommy. He missed you and was crying during the night, but we got it handled._

F: _You should have called. We would have taken Tommy back._

T: _Wasn’t necessary. We watched a few old photos of you on my phone, and he fell asleep half-way through._

F: _You still should have called._

T: _Nope! As little as I want to think about what Oliver and you are doing when you’re alone, I am counting on more nieces and nephews. That’s the reason I am babysitting, right?_

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, smiling to herself. If Thea knew that it was only a couple of months until she was going to be an aunt once more, she would freak out. It was too early to tell anybody, though. And it wasn’t a lie if she told her that they weren’t making a baby now.

F: _Nope, no baby-making happening here. Besides, have your own babies!_

T: _I can’t spoil them as much as I can spoil yours. Gotta go now. We take the kids swimming. I’ll call before I drop them back at your place._

F: _Have fun!_

Sighing, Felicity put her phone back to the nightstand. The kids were safe with Thea and Roy. Especially Emmy loved spending time away because she loved being spoilt and people who didn’t have kids like Thea, Roy and Laurel or whose children had already grown up like Donna’s and Quentin’s just loved spoiling kids. Tommy enjoyed some time away too, but he usually missed his mommy more.

Felicity loved teasing Oliver with that. While their daddy’s girl Emmy loved spending some time away, momma’s boy Tommy loved being home with mommy more.

She couldn’t wait to find out if the baby she was carrying was going to be a momma’s or daddy’s child. Either way, they would both love this baby so much. Besides, Emmy had been such a daddy’s girl at the beginning, but it had evened out mostly. Felicity had a strong belief that the same would happen to Tommy and to the unborn baby too. No matter who they generally preferred, they loved both of them and with time their preferences would slowly decrease.

“What’s making you smile?”

“Our babies,” Felicity replied, opening her eyes to find Oliver standing at her side of the bed with a small tray in his hands. “Oh, I see food is ready.”

Oliver sat down at the edge of the mattress, putting the tray to Felicity’s outstretched legs after she had sat up. Felicity looked at what he had brought her. There was some white bread with quark, some scrambled eggs and ginger tea. Looking up at Oliver, she cocked her head.

“Where is my coffee?”

“You don’t want decaf.”

“I want the real one.”

Oliver sighed. “Felicity, we had this conversation every day in the last weeks since we found out you are pregnant.”

“And we are going to have it every day until I stop breastfeeding,” Felicity replied.

“You quit on coffee before I knew you were pregnant already. Not that I noticed given that we barely have breakfast together,” he added in a mumble. “Why do you make a big deal of it now?”

“Because I can,” Felicity simply replied with a shrug of her shoulders and an amused grin.

Oliver chuckled. “Yes, you can. Yet you won’t get any coffee.”

He watched her while Felicity was starting to eat. She took little bites, testing if her stomach was ready for it. When she gulped down the first bites and didn’t feel new nausea building, she was more than relieved.

“Thea wants us to have another baby,” she stated after a while, lifting the cup of tea to her lips. “She thinks she is babysitting, so we can make a baby.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow. “Did you tell her?”

“That I’m pregnant?” Felicity asked, and Oliver nodded. “No. It’s too soon. I told her to have her own babies.”

“Woah, don’t encourage that. When they have their own babies, they won’t babysit ours anymore!”

“Don’t worry,” Felicity replied, patting his knee gently. “She wants to spoil rather than educate kids anyway. Reminds me of you.”

“Hey, I do educate the kids,” Oliver answered.

“Yeah, but you don’t like it.”

“Well, who likes to put kids into time-out or anything,” Oliver mumbled.

Chuckling, Felicity took another bite of the white bread. While chewing, she felt her mouth going dry. She pushed the food into her cheek, her chewing getting slower.

“What?” Oliver asked. “You don’t like the breakfast?”

“No, it’s delicious,” Felicity replied.

“You need to throw up again?”

When Felicity nodded, Oliver quickly took the tray from her legs. She jumped out of bed and hurried into the bathroom, Oliver right behind her. And just like before he held back her hair and rubbed her back soothingly.

When Oliver handed her a cold, wet washcloth this time, he suggested, “Maybe I should just get our blankets and pillows here, so we can make ourselves comfortable here.”

Felicity smiled. “I would like that.”

Oliver kissed the corner of her lips, gave her the toothbrush and went back to the bedroom. Felicity put her hand free to her stomach, stroking it gently. She hated morning sickness, but she knew it was a small price to pay for the joy their baby would bring them.

When her stomach grumbled, she called out to Oliver, “Oh, and don’t forget the food! Mama’s still hungry!”


	160. A little crisis

“Are you ready for this?” Oliver asked with a sigh, looking at Felicity. “Because I can tell that I am not.”

Felicity chuckled, dipping her fingers into the water in the bathtub to check the temperature. “Hey, for me it will be easy. You are the only one who will get in trouble.”

“Okay, why exactly do you think that you get to bathe Tommy and I will have to take care of Emmy? Who says it’s not the other way around?”

Felicity put her hand to her flat stomach and stroked it gently. Frowning, she looked at Oliver and cocked her head. “Oliver, I am pregnant. You don’t want to put our baby and me through the struggle of having to bathe Emmy, right?”

Doing her best to hold back a smile, she watched him biting his tongue and looking at her with a grim face. When he didn’t answer, she increased the level of innocence on her face. It took a few seconds, but eventually Oliver sighed in defeat.

“You won’t get to play that card for the 31 weeks left.”

“Of course I will,” Felicity replied. “Besides, it’s only to our best.”

“Yesterday you asked me to go downstairs to get you something to drink, so you didn’t have to get out of bed.”

“I was thirsty,” Felicity replied, “and I could have fallen down the stairs or something. And stop complaining. I stopped after the fifth time when I could have gone on like forever.”

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest and replied with low sarcasm in his “Oh, right. That was so nice of you.”

“Right?” Felicity asked with an amused smile.

They held each other’s gazes for a couple of minutes before they both started chuckling. Felicity knew that Oliver always knew when she used the pregnancy to get him to do things for her. Both of them also knew that he’d do anything she asked him for even without her using the pregnancy. It was just so much more fun to make it about the baby.

“Ready to bathe the kids now?” Oliver asked.

“Sure,” Felicity replied with a smile, getting up from the rim of the bathtub. When she passed Oliver, she stroked her hand over his chest and added, “I get to bathe Tommy, so it’s easy for me anyway.”

Sighing, Oliver followed her downstairs to the living room. Emmy and Tommy were sitting on the floor and playing with some bricks. As soon as Emmy looked up and saw her parents approaching, though, she quickly jumped up and ran away.

“Well, that is your problem to take care of,” Felicity said to Oliver, looking back at him over her shoulder. Ignoring Oliver’s grumble, she went over to Tommy and lifted him from the floor. “Hi, buddy. Do you know what we are going to do now?”

“Bathe!” Tommy replied, clapping his little hands.

Felicity nodded. “Yes! We are going to bathe!”

When she turned around to head to the stairs, she found Oliver still standing at the door step, watching her and Tommy. She gave him a teasing smile, and Oliver rolled his eyes in response. When she went past him, Oliver playfully slapped her butt before he started moving to try finding Emmy.

“Good thing that we both like taking a good bath, right?” Felicity asked Tommy, and the little boy laughed in response.

Tommy loved bathing or at least he enjoyed it when it didn’t last too long. He was unproblematic with that. Felicity would undress him, put him in the bathtub, wash his body and his hair and take him out again to towel him down. With Tommy it was as easy as that.

Emmy was different, though. She didn’t have the patience to stay in the bathtub for too long. For some time it had helped when she had just bathed with her baby brother, but that had stopped a few weeks ago. Now she was making a drama whenever it was time for the bath. She would hide and try to use every opportunity to run away again after Oliver had found her. She was clowning around, leaving the bathroom in a terrible mess most of the time. And if she didn’t clown around, she was screaming like somebody tried to take her. They had tried to make her take a shower instead, but that had only been worse.

As soon Felicity she had undressed Tommy, she lifted him from the floor and sat him down in the warm water. She kneeled down on the tiles next to the bathtub and moved her hand through the water until she found the washcloth she had thrown in there.

“You know, what’s best about you being unproblematic when it comes to bathing?” Felicity asked Tommy. “The water is all clean for you. And Emmy has to bathe in the water you already used. That’s cool right?”

Tommy ignored his mother, moving his hands through the water instead. So Felicity started washing him up with the washcloth. She knew that if bathing took too long, he would grow impatient and start crying.

“Mama?” he asked when Felicity was moving the washcloth over his right shoulder.

“Yes, buddy?” Felicity asked while Tommy was starting to look around. “Hey, you need something?”

“Mama, Tommy bubber duck!”

“You want your rubber duck?” Felicity asked. “Sure.”

She quickly straightened up to get the rubber duck from the rim of the sink and handed it over to Tommy. He started playing with it immediately, giving Felicity the perfect opportunity to wash the rest of his little body with the washcloth.

“And now the hair,” she said before applying some shampoo to his dark hair and massaging it into his scalp.

Smiling, Felicity watched Tommy playing with the duck. He dipped it under the surface of the water, let it go there and laughed in delight when the duck arose again.

“Mama!” he called out, making sure Felicity watched when he did it once more.

“That’s funny, right?” Felicity asked.

Tommy repeated the fun a few times before he kissed the duck and held it out for Felicity. “Mama!”

“Oh, you want me to take it?” Felicity asked.

She reached out her hands for the duck, but Tommy didn’t give it to her. Instead he pressed the duck’s bill to her lips, so she kissed the part he had been kissing before.  

“Oh, thank you so much,” Felicity said before she leaned over and kissed Tommy gently.

“Mama, out!” Tommy said, trying to get up in the bathtub.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!” Felicity hurried to say, holding onto Tommy’s upper arm to keep him from getting up.

“Mama, out!”

“We just need to wash out the shampoo,” Felicity said. “You can’t get out with the shampoo in your hair. Okay, sit down for a moment longer.”

Tommy didn’t look too pleased, but he sat down nonetheless.

“Okay, put your head back,” Felicity asked him.

She washed the shampoo out of his hair, making sure none of it would get into his eyes. As soon as she turned the water off, Tommy got up and reached his hands out for her.

“Mama!”

“Yes, now you can get out,” Felicity replied. She took the towel from the floor next to her, wrapped Tommy into it and lifted him out of the bathtub. “See that? We are already ready, and daddy still didn’t get Emmy into the bathtub.”

“That will change now, though.”

At Oliver’s words, Felicity turned around. Oliver was stepping into the bathroom. He carried Emmy, who had her arms crossed in front of her chest and put on a pouting face, over his shoulder.

“Mommy, do I really need to bathe?” she asked.

“Yes, you do,” Felicity replied, trying to stop herself from chuckling at the sight. “You will do exactly how daddy says and behave.”

“But I don’t want to bathe!”

“Well, you have to,” Oliver replied.

He put her down onto the floor and started undressing her. Emmy kept her arms crossed in front of her chest stubbornly, not making it any easier for Oliver.

“Can’t mommy bathe me?”

“No,” Felicity hurried to say. “Mommy needs to take care of Tommy. Besides, you don’t behave any better with me, so…”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, ignoring her daughter’s punishing gazes. She wrapped the blanket tighter around Tommy and lifted him back into her arms.

“I will go and get Tommy dressed,” she stated before she left the bathroom.

“Daddy, I don’t want to take a bath,” she heard Emmy complain when she left her daughter and her husband alone.

“You will take a bath, though,” Oliver replied. “No discussion about that.”

“But I don’t want to!”

Smiling, Felicity kissed Tommy’s temple. He wasn’t the easy child often, but when it came to bathing he really was. Tommy rested his head against her shoulder, snuggling against her with a yawn.

“We will get you dressed, make you some dinner and then I’ll put you to bed,” Felicity said, moving her hand over his back.

She had just reached Tommy’s room when high-pitched screams came from the bathroom. Chuckling quietly, Felicity shook her head. When Emmy had to bathe, it always sounded like they were stabbing someone inside of their house. She was only waiting for the day that they forgot to shut the windows and their neighbors would call the police.

When Felicity closed the door from Tommy’s room to the hallway, shutting out Emmy’s hysterical screams, she looked at her son with an amused smile and said, “Thank God, we are a so much better team than daddy and Emmy are, right? Come on, give me five.”

She held out her flat hand and immediately Tommy slapped his little hand on hers. Felicity smiled, kissing his cheek.

“Yes, we definitely are the better team, buddy.”


	161. Brothers and sisters

“Hey, you don’t have to do that,” Oliver said when he stepped into the kitchen and found Felicity being busy with emptying the dish washer. “Just leave everything as it is, and I will take care of it later when the kids are in bed.”

Chuckling, Felicity straightened up, put the two mugs in the wall cupboard and turned around to him. She cocked her head, looking at him with a loving smile on her lips. “You don’t need to take such good care of me. I’m fine.”

“You like it when I take care of you,” Oliver replied, stepping behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. He lowered his head to the side of the neck and gently kissed her delicate skin. “You even use the pregnancy to make me take better care of you than I usually do already.

Felicity put her hands to his on her stomach, resting her head back against his shoulder and closing her eyes. “It is fun when it’s about the little things I could do and just don’t want to do because I prefer being all lazy. You know, things like getting up from the couch or out of bed to get things I need.”

“And you _want_ to empty the dishwasher?” Oliver asked.

Pursing her lips, Felicity opened her eyes and turned her head to look at him. “You won. You get to empty the dishwasher.”

Oliver chuckled. He put his hands to Felicity’s hips and turned her around in his arms, so her chest pressed against his. Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck while Oliver’s wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer against him. He smiled at her for a long moment before he ducked his head and kissed her. His lips brushed against hers gently, then pressed down a little more firmly.

“You consider being allowed to empty the dishwasher a win?” Oliver asked when their lips parted.

“It’s a win for you given that you wanted to empty it.”

“That’s true,” Oliver replied, leaning forward and kissing Felicity once more. When he pulled back this time, he knew the smile on his lips widened even more. “The kids are in the living room. We can tell them now.”

He had been looking forward to telling the kids about the baby he and Felicity were having since he knew about the pregnancy. He remembered very well how excited Emmy had been when she had learned about Tommy, and he knew how much she wished for another baby. She shared his love for babies like nobody else did. He couldn’t wait to get started on setting up the baby’s nursery and preparing everything that needed to be prepared for the baby’s arrival.

Oliver knew it was actually a little bit too. It was even too early to tell anyone. He and Felicity had wanted to wait until after the twelfth week at least. Given that William was only going to come back here the next time in two weeks because of a school trip next week and they wanted to tell all three kids at the same time and in person, they had decided to tell them a little earlier. According to the doctor the baby looked fine and they were close to the end of the twelfth week anyway, so they were confident that telling the kids a little earlier wouldn’t be something they would have to regret later. Besides, Felicity had been in the 36th week with Tommy when she had fallen down the stairs and they had almost lost Tommy. There was no guarantee that after the twelfth week everything really was going to be fine.

“Then let’s go, right?” Felicity asked.

Oliver smiled. “Right.”

He pecked her lips once more before he took her hand and pulled her with him to the living room. As soon as they stepped into the room, the kids all fell silent. They were sitting together on the couch where Oliver had asked them to wait for Felicity and him to tell them something important. He cast the three kids a smile before he sat down on the opposite side of the table and pulled Felicity close to him, resting one hand on her knee.

He was just about to start speaking when he realized that he had no idea how to start. Emmy and William were looking at him expectantly while Tommy quickly slid off the couch to run over to Felicity and crawl onto her lap instead. Oliver tried to remember how they had told Emmy when Felicity had been pregnant with Tommy, but all that came to his mind was that they had pulled her close, told her and she had quickly grabbed a stuffed animal and started talking to her baby brother. With three kids and one of them a teenager that wasn’t as easy, though.

Oliver had wanted to be the one to tell the kids that Felicity was pregnant. He had been so excited about their reactions. Now that the moment was there he figured that he had no idea how to tell them, though. Should he say a few words about families in general or at least about their family or should he just say it?

“Why your father and I asked you to listen to us for a second,” Felicity asked, shooting him a short glance, and Oliver squeezed her knee in gratitude for knowing that she needed to be the one to tell the kids after all, “is because we want to tell you that I am pregnant. We are having a baby.”

If he had known that saying it as simple as that would be enough, he might have actually been able to do it himself.

He didn’t have much time to regret not trying it, though. It only took the beat of a second after the last syllable had fallen from Felicity’s lips before Emmy let out a high-pitched scream of excitement. She jumped down from the couch, ran over to her mother and hugged her tightly, almost crushing her little brother, who was still sitting on Felicity lap and now trying to push Emmy away to have his mommy all for himself again.

“A baby, mommy?” Emmy asked, looking at her mother with a happy smile. “Really?”

Felicity smiled, wrapping her arm around Emmy’s back and nodding. “Yes, a baby.”

“Baby?” Tommy asked, stopping his attempts to push his sister’s head away from where it was now resting against Felicity’s stomach.

“Yes, a baby,” Emmy quickly replied. She straightened up, took Tommy’s hand and put it to Felicity’s lower stomach. “There’s a baby. It will grow and then it will come here. Right, mommy?”

Felicity smiled, nodding. “Yes, absolutely.”

Oliver kept watching the three of them. Emmy told her brother everything she knew about pregnancies and babies, every now and then asking her mother if she got it right. Tommy seemed to have trouble understanding, but he repeated Emmy’s words – “Baby in mommy’s tummy?” – and he mimicked everything Emmy did. When Emmy leaned down and kissed Felicity stomach and Tommy did the same, Oliver had trouble controlling his emotions. That was exactly what he had wished for. It was one of those mental images that would be forever burnt into his memory.

The only one who was missing was William. As soon as Oliver realized that, he turned his head to cast a look at his oldest son. William was still sitting on the couch opposite of the table, watching the scene between Felicity, Emmy and Tommy. Oliver didn’t really know what that expression on his face was supposed to say, but it looked uncomfortable and even slightly worried.

When he looked back at Felicity, he realized that she had noticed the same. Their eyes met for a short moment before Felicity looked at Emmy.

“Do you want to call grandma and tell her about the baby?” Felicity asked Emmy.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly, already running out of the room. “And I want to tell aunt Thea and aunt Laurel and uncle John and uncle Barry and…”

Felicity chuckled. “Now let’s start with grandma.”

She lifted Tommy onto her arms when she got up from the couch, shot another glance at William and Oliver and then left. Oliver looked after her for only a moment longer before he looked at William.

“Congrats, Dad,” William said. “I guess that’s really good news, right?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, it’s amazing.”

William held Oliver’s gaze for a moment longer before he looked down at his feet and pushed his hands under his thighs. Silence settled in the room.

“Everything alright with you?” Oliver asked carefully. “I know little siblings can be annoying. Thea ran after me and my best friend for years, following us wherever we wanted to go, but it’s only because she was looking up to me in a way. Emmy and Tommy are looking up to you, and I am sure the baby will do the same. I understand if that gets annoying from time to time. You just have to say a word, and I will take care that you get a little more rest from them and- “

“It’s not about that or the baby,” William interrupted him. He looked up at Oliver for only a second before he lowered his gaze again. “At least not really.”

Oliver waited for William to continue, but he stayed quiet.

“You can tell me,” Oliver stated. “You can tell me everything.”

“It’s just that… a lot will change now, won’t it?” William asked without looking up.

“Some things will,” Oliver agreed honestly. “As tiny as a baby is, of course it’s a big thing for a family. It’s a big thing in a positive way, though.”

Again William looked up, holding his father’s gaze for longer now. “The baby will need a room.”

“Of course. The playroom will be turned into a nursery. Emmy and Tommy will have to take their toys to their bedrooms. They have the room there, so it shouldn’t be a problem. The four rooms upstairs were always meant to be for four kids in a way,” Oliver explained, looking at his son carefully. “You didn’t think you were going to have to give up your room right?”

William lowered his gaze. “I’m not here very often anyway, so I thought-“

“Not going to happen,” Oliver assured him. “William, you are as much a part of this family as Emmy and Tommy and the new baby. You will always have your room here, and nobody will take it away. I don’t know if I have done anything to make you doubt this, but I love you and I want you to see this house as a second home and us as a second family next to your mom.”

William looked at Oliver for a long moment, not saying a word. Oliver wondered if he had done anything that had made William doubt that he was a part of their family. He knew that it still all wasn’t really easy for him, but he had found his place in the family. He was great with his siblings. He got along great with Felicity. He was his son. Over the last year, since he was allowed to come here regularly and had met Felicity, he had grown into this family. Oliver had thought that by now William would know how much he meant to them.

“Aren’t babies usually always more important?” William asked. “When Alex’ parents got divorced and his dad had a new wife and a new baby, Alex was invited less and less to his dad until the visits finally stopped completely. So if you and Felicity have another baby-”

“It won’t change anything between you and me or you and this family,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “You are always welcome here. I promise.”

William nodded slightly, looking at his father in doubt. Only when he seemed to find no sign of doubt in Oliver’s face, he finally started smiling. “Thanks, Dad.”

“Not for that,” Oliver replied.

“Do you want a boy or a girl?”

Oliver chuckled. “Definitely a girl! Don’t get me wrong. I love you, and I love your little brother, but after two boys it would be nice to have another girl. I’m just into buying all that glitter stuff and doing princess tea parties.”

William perked up an eyebrow. “Really?”

Again Oliver chuckled. Years ago he would have never thought that was possible, but after years of darkness, killing and torture, yes, doing all that girly stuff with Emmy was one of those things that always helped him when he wanted to forget about everything else. Besides, Emmy looked just like Felicity, so…

“I just like spending time with you and the rest of the family in general,” Oliver admitted, shrugging his shoulders, “so it doesn’t really matter if it’s a boy or a girl.”

William nodded slowly. “Felicity said you almost got divorced over choosing a name for Emmy.”

“She’s exaggerating,” Oliver replied, “at least a little. To be honest I’d let her choose a name before the fight gets too serious. Just don’t tell her.”

William moved his thumb and forefinger over the seam between his lips, zipping them with a smile. “Your secret is safe with me.”

“Good because I am not giving up on choosing the name easily,” Oliver replied with a smile of his own.

The two of them stayed where they were, just smiling at each other, for a moment longer. When a high-pitched scream was heard from the kitchen, William’s eyes widened, making Oliver chuckle.

“I guess they told my mother-in-law.”

“We should probably join them in the kitchen. I am sure Donna will want to talk to you.”

Oliver nodded, watching William carefully. “Everything alright now?”

William nodded. “I am happy for you and… I like Emmy and Tommy. I think it would be nice to get to know a sibling from the very beginning.”

“And whenever there is anything that bothers you, just tell me or Felicity. We are always here for you.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

Nodding his head towards the door, they both got up and left. Oliver put a hand to his son’s shoulder, smiling in relief. He was sure that this baby was only going to bring them all closer together.


	162. Man-flu

As soon as she had directed the car into the garage and turned off the engine, Felicity gripped the steering wheel a little more tightly, focusing her eyes on the rearview. There was nothing extraordinary and yet she kept her eyes on what she saw while the garage door closed behind her. Only when she was safely locked in the garage, Felicity let go of the steering wheel and leaned her head back with a sigh, closing her eyes.

“Baby, if you are making me feel like this, I need to politely ask you to stop,” Felicity whispered, putting her hand to the little bump she had by now. “You don’t have to worry. I am taking care of you. You don’t need to remind me that I need to do that. I know that.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, held it for a moment and then slowly breathed out through her mouth. Her hand kept stroking over the slight bump. It seemed like with every baby the bump was showing earlier. Felicity didn’t mind, though. She was in the 14th week now and everyone knew she was pregnant, so she didn’t have to hide the bump. And if Oliver had talents, one of those was certainly that he could make Felicity forget any insecurities she could have about her body.

Frowning, she opened her eyes and looked down at her hand on her bump. “Baby, you are still making me feel this… alerted. I think you need to stop because it really is hard to focus on anything else.”

All day she had felt like she was followed and observed. She had a good intuition, so she had carefully taken in her surroundings wherever she had been. There hadn’t been anything suspicious, though. Nobody seemed to follow her. Nobody seemed to watch her. It was only happening in her thoughts. Felicity’s immediate thought had been that her hormones were just driving her crazy as they usually did. She could feel like laughing, then like crying, like she was starving, then nauseous and so much more in less than half an hour. Maybe a slight paranoia was now added to the variety of emotions the hormones put her through.

On the other hand maybe it was more than just hormones, though. When Tommy had only been a few months, he had been abducted by Cupid while Felicity and Emmy had been abducted by her college stalker Foster. The irrational guilt of not having been able to protect her children back then was still a part of her. She was able to handle it most of the time, but maybe the fact that she was having another baby had prompted the feeling of insecurity in her again. She wanted to keep this baby safe. She really did. Maybe that was the reason why she was feeling this insure again now.

“You know what we will do now, Baby?” Felicity asked in a whisper, smiling down at the bump. “We will go to daddy and tell him. Daddy will know exactly what is going on.”

Felicity unbuckled the seat belt and quickly got out of the car. When she hurried through the basement that was linked to the garage, Felicity thought about how true it was what she had told the baby. Oliver would know exactly what was going on. He understood the urge to protect your loved ones and he understood the irrational fear that you might fail. He had been going through that since he had come back from the island nine years ago.

She quickly went upstairs and stepped through the door into the entrance area. She shot a look towards the kitchen and towards the stairs, but nobody was there. Felicity pursed her lips. She had grown used to Emmy running right towards her and throwing herself at her when her mommy was coming home. When Felicity was pregnant, Oliver was usually all forgotten for Emmy. Tommy would follow his older sister immediately and later Oliver would do the same. She missed the big family hug they had always shared then and that she wasn’t getting now.

“I’m home!” she called out.

When she didn’t get an answer, she felt her heartbeat quickening. Oliver hadn’t told her that he was taking the kids out to the park or wherever else, and he always texted her when he did so, especially when he knew she was coming home and would find an empty house. Usually Felicity wouldn’t freak out if they happened to not be home even without getting a message, but after she had had this weird feeling of being followed and watched all day, it did freak her out today.

“Oliver?” she called out once more, dropping her purse to the floor carelessly and stepping more into the room. “Oliver?!”

She quickly ran upstairs. If there was an easy explanation that nobody was welcoming her home -- and she needed to think that there was an easy explanation! --, then it was most likely that Oliver and the kids just didn’t hear her because they were upstairs. They just needed to be upstairs. They needed-

“Mommy!”

Felicity almost felt tears of relief springing to her eyes when Tommy let the stuffed elephant fall from his hands and ran right towards her. She quickly walked up the two steps left and caught Tommy in her arms. She lifted him against her and held him close while his arms were wrapping around her neck.

“Hi, my little boy,” Felicity whispered, rubbing her hand over her son’s back and resting her head against his shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“Yes.”

“That’s good.”

When Felicity kissed Tommy’s cheek, he pulled back in her arms a little bit. He put his hands to her cheeks and nuzzled her nose with his, making Felicity smile. Felicity knew that it was a result of the pregnancy that Tommy was even clingier than he usually was. He didn’t like that Emmy was giving Felicity that much of her attention now. He preferred to have his mom all for himself.

“Where are daddy and Emmy?” Felicity asked.

“Daddy sick,” Tommy answered.

“Daddy is sick?”

Tommy nodded. “Daddy bed.”

“Oh, yes,” Felicity replied. “If daddy’s sick, he should be in bed.”

She smiled away the frown she felt forming on her forehead and started walking towards the bedroom. Oliver rarely ever was sick. Usually the worst thing there was for him were occasional migraines and-

“Mama, elephant!”

“What?”

“Tommy elephant daddy,” Tommy replied, pointing down at the floor to the stuffed elephant he had left there when he had run to welcome his mom home.

“Oh, you want to give that to daddy?” Felicity asked, crouching down and lifting the animal from the floor to hand it to Tommy. The little boy nodded and pressed the animal close to his chest, making Felicity smile. “That is very nice of you.”

“Emmy said.”

“Emmy said you should give it to daddy?”

Tommy nodded, making Felicity smile even more. Of course Emmy had taken the reins when Oliver was sick. She loved taking care of her family. Being responsible for her daddy and her little brother was one of her favorite things to do. When Felicity had started working again after Tommy’s birth, the only way Emmy had been okay with that had been when Felicity had told her that she’d be responsible to take care of their two boys then. She had been so proud with that responsibility.

“Tommy is getting more stuffed animals,” Felicity heard Emmy’s voice when she approached the door to the bedroom that had been left ajar. “Is it warm enough, Daddy?”

“Not yet,” Oliver answered with quite throaty voice.

“I’ll pull the blanket higher.”

“Thank you, sweetie. Maybe a tight cuddle would help.”

When Felicity stepped into the doorframe, she found Oliver and Emmy together on the bed. He had the blanket tugged up to right under his chin. The outline of his body was framed by stuffed animals that should probably keep him warm. Emmy was crawling on top him, probably to cuddle him as he had suggested it.

“Emmy, elephant!” Tommy called out before she could do so, though.

Emmy turned her head towards Felicity and Tommy, a big smile forming on her small lips. “Mommy!”

Immediately she crawled off Oliver and ran to her mother. She hugged Felicity tightly, wrapping her arms around her waist and pressing her head against her mother’s stomach. Felicity gently stroked her hand over her daughter’s curly hair. Emmy smiled up at her mom for a moment before she kissed the bump.

“Hi, baby,” Emmy whispered. She kissed the bump again and then looked back at her mom. “Is the baby alright?”

Felicity didn’t get to answer because before she could do so, Oliver started coughing heavily. His whole body was shaking, and once the worst of the coughing was over, he took in a struggling breath that he released with a suffering sigh. Moaning, he turned his head to the side and put on a pained face.

“Daddy’s sick,” Emmy whispered before she turned around to crawl back onto the bed and on top of Oliver. She lowered her upper body on his chest, hugging him tightly. “You are going to be okay, Daddy.”

“I am not sure about that,” Oliver replied with husky voice and coughed some more.

“Mommy, can you make the special soup for daddy?” Emmy asked, gently stroking her hand over her daddy’s chest. “I think he needs it.”

“Hm…” Felicity made, stepping closer to the bed and putting Tommy on the mattress when he started to struggle out of her hold. The little boy crawled to his father and put the elephant to his cheek, making sure his face was warm.

“Thank you, buddy,” Oliver replied.

“Tommy, come here,” Emmy suggested, holding out her hand for her brother. “Daddy needs the warmth.”

“Oh, yes,” Oliver said with a content sigh when Tommy snuggled up to his side. “Feeling a little better already.”

“Mommy’s soup is going to make it even better,” Emmy said and looked at her mother. “Mommy, you have to make it.”

“Yeah, well, if it makes daddy feel better,” Felicity said with a sigh. “Emmy, do you want to get everything ready downstairs while I will take care of daddy for a short time? You could get the pots I need out and such stuff.”

“Okay,” Emmy said. She sat up on Oliver’s chest and gently kissed his lips. “I’ll be back soon, Daddy.”

“Thanks, Sweetie,” Oliver replied and coughed. “Please hurry.”

Immediately Emmy crawled off the bed and ran out of the room. Felicity meanwhile stepped closer to the bed, lifted Tommy from Oliver’s chest and put him to the floor.

“Buddy, can you get some more stuffed animals for daddy?” she asked him.

Tommy nodded. Felicity waited until he had walked out of the room before she turned back around to Oliver. She watched him with slightly narrowed eyes, eying him up carefully. Oliver held her gaze stubbornly, sniffling slightly, but he couldn’t fool her.

Felicity put her forefinger and middle finger to his face right under his cheekbones and pressed down firmly. Oliver frowned.

“What are you doing?” he asked her.

“Checking for a sign of sinusitis, but I don’t think you have any.”

“I never said I did,” Oliver replied quietly. “And that hurt by the way.”

“Oh, I am sure it did,” Felicity replied sarcastically and pursed her lips. She put her hand to his forehead and perked up her eyebrow.

“It’s warm, isn’t it?” Oliver asked.

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “No, it’s not warm which makes sense because if it was, you wouldn’t let the kids cuddle you. You’d never risk infecting them.”

Oliver looked at her for a moment before he said, “I have an aching throat. I’m really sick.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Of course I am.”

“Oliver.”

Oliver bit down on his tongue before he whispered between clenched teeth, “I don’t like when you’re talking to me with your loud voice.”

“The truth please then,” Felicity demanded, sitting down on the mattress next to him.

“Emmy and Tommy were both asking for you all day. I figured that I needed to distract them. They shouldn’t miss you all day, especially because we couldn’t go to visit you at work today, so I got sick.”

“You mean you _pretended_ to be sick?”

“No, I really have an aching throat,” Oliver assured her.

“And you thought you’d use that to get their attention?”

“No, to distract them,” Oliver replied with a wide grin. “It was only for them.”

“Oh, sure,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, shaking her head. “So selfless of you.”

“Right?” Oliver asked, his grin widening even more. “I think that deserves a kiss, doesn’t it?”

Felicity leaned down and gently kissed Oliver. He hummed against her lips contently and nuzzled her nose with his when their lips parted.

“I think my throat already feels a little better,” he explained.

“Oh, I should do it again then,” Felicity whispered and kissed him once more. She was just about to stroke her tongue into his mouth when-

“Dada!”

Felicity turned her head to find Tommy stepping into the room with a teddy in his hand. He held the stuffed animal out for Felicity.

“Thank you, buddy,” Felicity said and put the teddy to the juncture of Oliver’s neck and shoulder. “Can you get another one?”

Tommy nodded and immediately ran off, making Felicity smile. Oliver’s hands meanwhile snuck away from under the blanket and stroked over her butt.

“I think I need more of that medicine,” Oliver told her, coughing dramatically, “before it gets worse again.”

He already lifted his head from the pillow to kiss her again, but Felicity pulled back a little, putting her hand to his chest and gently pressing him back down into the pillow. She bit down on her bottom lip and moved to sit in his lap.

“We need to talk.”

“About my funeral? Because I can feel my throat closing,” Oliver said, dramatically gasping for breath. “I need a kiss.”

Felicity cocked her head. It would be easy to just agree to his this and kiss him, but she really needed to talk to him.

“Can we be serious for a moment please?”

“Are you alright?” Oliver asked, frowning at her. Whatever fun he had had disappeared from his face and he gently stroked his hands over her thighs.

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied honestly. “I just have a weird feeling.”

“The depression?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “I don’t think it’s the depression actually. It’s just a weird feeling.”

“Like what?” Oliver asked with a frown.

“Like I am being followed and watched,” Felicity explained. When Oliver started sitting up under her with his whole body tensing, Felicity quickly added, “I am not. I checked. I kept my eyes open, but there is nothing going on. It’s just a weird feeling.”

“We will-“

“I think it’s because of what happened with Cupid and Foster,” Felicity interrupted him before he could suggest any safety measures they should take. “I wasn’t able to protect Emmy and Tommy from getting kidnapped and hurt, so I feel like I need to protect this baby even more. I think.”

“Felicity, what happened back then wasn’t your fault,” he told her. “You did everything you could have done to keep them safe, but you couldn’t have done anything to prevent it.”

Felicity felt tears springing to her eyes. She hadn’t thought about that abduction in a long time. At least she hadn’t thought about it like that. Sure, sometimes a thought of that snuck to her mind because that time had been terrible. She was good at pushing those away, though. Not today obviously.

“If I had taken better care-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her. He took her hand and put it to the slight bump. “What happened wasn’t your fault. And even if it was, this baby is so well-protected right now, there is no need for you to worry.”

Felicity took in a deep breath and closed her eyes. Sighing, she leaned down and hid her face against the side of Oliver’s neck. His arms came wrapping around her tightly, holding her to him.

“I will take you to work tomorrow, okay?” Oliver whispered to her ear. “I’d feel safer.”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, so would I. Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Oliver replied, turning his head to kiss her forehead. “And I don’t want you to worry about anything, okay? It’s probably really just a weird feeling. And if it’s not, I will take care of it.”

“Okay.”

Felicity took some deep breaths, letting the scent of Oliver’s skin and the warmth of his body comfort her. She had known already that it was only a late reaction to the abduction. Yet Oliver’s agreeing words were what she had needed to really accept that. If he thought the same, it was probably true. She was happy that he would take her to work tomorrow, though. She would feel safer when he was there and check if she really hadn’t missed anything.

 “Feeling better?” Oliver asked when Felicity pulled back again, and she nodded. “Well, do I get another kiss then? Still have an aching throat.”

Chuckling, Felicity brushed her lips against his once more. She was just about to deepen the kiss when-

“Mommy! I got everything set up!”

“Great!” Felicity called back over her shoulder to Emmy, simultaneously winking at Tommy when he stepped back into the room. “Then come back upstairs to take care of daddy while I will make dinner!”

“You don’t have to do that,” Oliver whispered when Felicity turned back around to him.

“Well, I am not cooking the soup,” Felicity replied, “because I will starve before it is ready, but I will go with your game.”

“My game?”

“Of you being sick,” Felicity explained. She pecked his lips and slid of him to help Tommy onto the bed instead.

When Emmy came running back into the bedroom and immediately crawled onto the bed and to her dad, Felicity went to the door.

“I will order pizza.”

“Pizza!” Tommy said, rolling onto his back next to Oliver.

“Pizza sounds great,” Oliver replied, sniffling dramatically for Emmy, who immediately started rubbing her hand over his chest like it was helping her daddy to breathe.

“We don’t get pizza when we’re sick, though,” Emmy reminded.

“Well, but daddy’s a little older than Tommy and you, so he needs some other medicine then your brother or you. Besides, I don’t have everything I need for the soup,” Felicity explained. When Emmy frowned, Felicity put her hand to her bump and added, “And the cooking is too exhausting for the baby.”

“Oh, okay,” Emmy said, lying down on her daddy’s chest.

When Oliver rolled his eyes at that, Felicity chuckled. “Great. I’ll order the pizza.”

Smiling, she stepped out of the room to go downstairs and leave Oliver alone with the kids, so he could have all their attention. She had just taken the first steps when she heard Emmy asking, “Daddy?”

“Yes?”

“You’re not really sick, right?”

Oliver didn’t answer immediately, so Felicity stood still and waited. She knew Oliver. He would never lie to Emmy like that. It wasn’t a major thing here, but she was sure that he wouldn’t lie right to her face. She could almost see him pursing his lips and biting his tongue, searching for a good answer.

“I really have an aching throat.”

Felicity chuckled soundlessly, rolling her eyes and continuing her way downstairs. Well, it was the first time Oliver had ever used the man-flu to be taken care of. Given it was the first time in years, Felicity thought it was probably acceptable. She loved Oliver and she loved taking care of him. Besides, he had taken care of her so great in the last weeks, he deserved this day that everything revolved around him.


	163. Taken

When the fifth dialing tone ended without the call being taken, Oliver hung up. He felt his body tensing and his hand tightening around his phone. Shaking his head in disbelief, he gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut for a short moment. This just couldn’t be happening.

On his way to the door he grabbed his leather jacket and dialed the forth number on speed dial. He had tried to hold onto the little bit of patience and self-control he still had, but the little bit of what had been left of that after the last three calls had already gone to voicemail had faded away by now.

“Oliver, hi. I am-“

“You need to take the kids to the lair,” Oliver interrupted Quentin immediately. “Felicity has been taken.”

“What is that-“

“Is Laurel at work?”

Quentin stammered for a moment, taken aback by the question. Eventually he answered, “No, she’s here.”

“Good. Tell her to come with you. Be careful in case someone follows you and call me if there is anything going on. I’ll call John. See you in the lair.”

Oliver hung up before Quentin had the chance to say anything more. He let the door fall shut behind him and jogged over to the car, already dialing the second number on speed dial.

“Hey, what’s-“

“John, Felicity has been taken,” Oliver explained, getting into the car.

“I’ll call the team.”

“Laurel and Quentin are already informed,” Oliver answered, glad that his friend didn’t waste any time. “But Roy and Thea don’t know yet.”

“I’ll call them. Lyla will come with me too.”

“Thanks.”

Oliver started the engine and rubbed his hands over his face for a short moment. Two weeks ago Felicity had told him that she felt watched and followed. He had kept his eyes open and checked for anything suspicious, but he hadn’t found anything. There hadn’t been anything going on. So what had he missed and most importantly how could he have missed anything?

 

 

“Are we sure this is serious?” Quentin asked. He glanced back over his shoulder to where Emmy was playing with one of Felicity’s old computers with Tommy sitting next to her and trying to push some keys to play too. “Maybe she just didn’t pick up.”

“Felicity is never more than five feet from her phone,” Oliver replied. “I called her several times. She didn’t take any of the calls, and she didn’t message back that she can’t talk right now. I called her office, but she left already. Something _is_ wrong.”

“Okay, I think we can all agree that it _is_ serious,” John said. “Where could she be?”

“I have no idea,” Oliver admitted in a whisper, moving his hand over his short hair. “Two weeks ago she thought she was followed or observed or something.”

“What?” Laurel asked.

In the same moment Thea asked, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because it was nothing,” Oliver replied. “I drove her to work every day in a week and picked her back up later. I basically slept with my eyes open. Felicity said it was just that one day. The feeling was gone after that. We thought it was because of Foster and Cupid. They abducted Felicity and the kids, and Felicity feels like she should have been able to protect them from that. We thought she was just worried because now she didn’t only have to watch out for herself but also for the baby.”

“Okay, did someone try to locate her phone?” Roy asked.

“Yes,” Laurel answered, “but Felicity installed a few new programs and security things. Hats off if you can work through that.”

Roy pursed his lips. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants, admitting defeat. Felicity had tried to teach all of them a little bit more about the system, but it had been forgotten. There just had been too many other things going on lately and Felicity wasn’t exactly the most patient or understanding teacher.

“I think I know someone who can help with that.”

“You want to tell someone about this?” Thea asked, looking at her brother. “Are you sure it’s a good idea? I mean-“

“Felicity is missing, and she trusts Curtis,” Oliver simply replied, pulling his phone from the pocket of his jeans. “I’ll call him and tell him everything. If someone has a problem with that, you all know where the door is.”

“Okay, let’s just everyone calm down,” John stated with calm voice. “I think we should use any chance there is to get Felicity back, and if Oliver trusts this guy, I think we can all agree that he can be trusted and-“

John stopped when Oliver’s phone started ringing. All eyes were focused on Oliver while he was quickly lowering his gaze to the display of his phone.

“It’s Felicity,” Oliver said, feeling his heart beating up into his throat. He quickly took the call, turning around from his friends and taking the call. “Felicity?”

“Nope,” a young male voice answered, popping the ‘p’. “Mrs. Queen is not available now.”

Oliver felt his hand tightening around the phone in anger and fear even more. He had been right. Felicity had been taken. Clenching his teeth, he took in a deep breath.

“Who are you?”

“I will tell you once you get here. As soon as we hang up, I will text you the location.”

Oliver frowned. “What do you want?”

“I just want to talk.”

“Why don’t I believe you?”

The caller chuckled dryly. “Well, doesn’t matter whether you believe me or not, right? Because you are going to come here nonetheless. I have who you love the most.”

Who you love the most. The words echoed through Oliver’s mind, replaced by a different voice and a slightly different choice of words. Who _ever_ you love the most. Oliver felt his chest tightening at the memory of the cold blade being pressed against Felicity’s neck. Closing his eyes, he pushed the thought away.

“I want to talk to Felicity.”

“You get one minute.”

There was a quiet rustle as the phone was handed over.

“Oliver?”

Oliver released a breath he hadn’t known he had been holding. Felicity’s voice sounded slightly scared, but he didn’t think she was hurt or at least not badly hurt. Hearing her voice, getting confirmation that his feeling hadn’t betrayed him and she was still alive, released some of the tension in his body though he felt even more worried because Felicity was alive and she wasn’t safe by his side.

He turned back around to the team, nodding his head and everybody sighed with relief. With what they did and how they lived their lives weren’t safe. Felicity’s life was in even more danger because she was married to him and he had been a killer. He had enemies, a lot of enemies.

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked quietly.

“I think so, yes,” Felicity replied. “The day is just a little more exciting than necessary for me.”

Oliver smiled. “I’ll get you out of there soon, okay?”

“I know,” Felicity whispered. “Just promise me you will be careful.”

“I will do whatever it takes to get you home safely and-“

“Time to talk is over,” the male voice said again.

Oliver gritted his teeth. “That wasn’t a minute.”

The caller chuckled dryly once more. “Sue me!”

When the call was ended, Oliver took in a deep breath and hung up. He would get Felicity back, no matter the cost. He had been so close to losing her so often already he should be used to it by now. He wasn’t, though. He wasn’t used it, and he never would be. No matter how often Felicity would be in danger and come back safely, he would always feel like it was ripping his soul apart when he didn’t know she whether she was safe or even worse knew exactly that she wasn’t.

When his phone beeped, announcing the location, Oliver shot a short glance at the display. Apparently Felicity had been taken to an unused warehouse. He couldn’t count how many times he had been at that location in the last years already. Maybe once this was over they should check if there was like a website where criminals could inform themselves about good places to hide abducted victims or stolen goods or gather their gangs.

“Ollie?” Laurel asked quietly.

Oliver looked up, his eyes determined. “Quentin, you will stay here and take care of the kids. We others will go to the location. I will talk to the guy. You will back me up, but stay in the background. If he as much as twitches, I will kill him. Any questions?” Nobody moved. “Good, then suit up.”

Roy and Laurel headed towards the changing room while Lyla and Quentin went towards the kids. Thea stepped in front of Oliver.

“When I said that we should talk about telling anyone, I didn’t mean-“

“It’s okay,” Oliver assured her, putting a hand on her shoulder and squeezing. “I’m just a little taut.”

“Well, who wouldn’t be in your situation?” Thea replied with a comforting smile. “We will get Felicity back.”

She straightened up onto her tiptoes and hugged him tightly for a moment. Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist, letting his sister comfort him. When Thea pulled back, she smiled at him once more. Then she turned around and followed Laurel and Roy to the changing rooms.

“You know who has her,” John stated, not needing to ask.

“I don’t really know, but…”

“You are worried.”

“My wife is abducted. Of course I am worried,” Oliver replied.

He felt his thumb rubbing against the tips of the other fingers. He always did that when he was nervous. If Felicity was here, she’d take his hand and hold it between both of hers. She wasn’t here, though.

Oliver walked past John towards the changing rooms and quickly changed into his suit. He tried to make a plan on what he would say, but he felt like no matter what he would plan, those plans would be destroyed.

The good thing was that the abductor wanted something that was not Felicity. With Foster the problem had been that he had wanted Felicity and Emmy to be a family with them. It had made it almost impossible for Oliver to catch him. The man who had taken Felicity today, though, wanted something from him. Oliver doubted that it really was just a talk, but at least he knew where Felicity was now and he could work on getting her back right away.

He just hated that this was happening at all. Felicity was pregnant. She didn’t need this stress. It could cause the depression to come back or something to happen to the baby. He didn’t want to think about either of it. Even thinking about it…

“Can we head out?” Roy asked when Oliver stepped back into the main area of the foundry.

“Get the van ready,” he ordered, glancing at where Emmy and Tommy were still playing on the laptop. “I’ll follow in a second. I need to do something else first.”

“I’ll drive,” Lyla suggested, taking the keys from her husband’s fingers and heading towards the back exist.

Oliver waited until they had all left before he turned back to his kids. He shot Quentin a serious look, and with a nod of his head he headed towards Felicity’s work station, giving Oliver and the kids some privacy.

Oliver took in a deep breath, gathering his courage before he walked over to them. He kneeled down in front of the couch, gently taking the laptop from Emmy’s hands. She looked at him immediately, not saying a word.

“Daddy needs to leave for a little time,” he told her, reaching out his hands and pulling Tommy close to him when the little boy attempt to climb off the couch. He kissed his son’s temple gently before he looked back at Emmy again. “I hope it won’t take long. Grandpa is going to stay with the two of you.”

Emmy looked down, playing with her tights. Oliver waited for her to say something, but she stayed quiet. She continued to avoid his gaze.

“Talk to me, Sweetie.”

“Why do you need to go out as the Arrow?” Emmy asked, looking back up. “Is it because mommy is not here?”

Oliver felt his heart break a little more than he felt it had already been broken. Emmy was only four and a half years old. She wasn’t supposed to know such things. She was supposed to be a careless little child. She knew something was wrong, though, and he wasn’t going to lie to her. She’d know if he was lying anyway, so Oliver nodded sadly.

“Yes, it’s because of mommy.”

“Does someone bad have her?”

Again Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“You will get her back, daddy,” Emmy whispered, leaning forward and hugging her daddy tightly. She put her arms around his neck and rested her head against his shoulder. Oliver felt his throat closing given how much trust his daughter had in him. She nuzzled his neck, adding, “You get mommy back because you have help. You have Spartan and Speedy and Arsenal and Black Canary. And Aunt Lyla?”

“Aunt Lyla is Harbinger.”

“That’s a weird name,” Emmy said, frowning a little bit. “But she can help too, right?”

“Yes, she can help too. They will all help and that is why I will get mommy back,” Oliver promised. “Does daddy get a kiss for lucky charm?”

Smiling, Emmy kissed him. Tommy watched and then followed his sister’s example and kissed his daddy too, scrunching his nose when Oliver’s stubble tickled him.

“Okay, you two be nice when grandpa is watching you, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy promised.

“‘kay,” Tommy promised too.

“You two are the best,” Oliver whispered.

He kissed both of their heads and then straightened up. He sat Tommy on the couch, kissed the kids one last time and then turned around to get Felicity back and he was getting her back. There was just no other way.

 

 

The cable ties were cutting into the skin of her wrists and ankles. Her body was shaking from the cold and goosebumps had spread on her arms and legs. She was thirsty, tired and uncomfortable. She wished she could just close her eyes and pretend to be home in bed with Oliver at her side, but she didn’t dare to.

Instead her eyes stayed focused on the man or rather boy in front of her. Felicity doubted that he had even reached his twenties yet. He was maybe five years older at William at max, and William was only turning 14 years old in a few weeks. It was crazy how such a young human being could have knocked her out by the use of chloroform, abducted her and tied her to a chair. Now here they were in a dark warehouse with him staring at her while leaning against the edge of a table a few feet away.

“How long do you want to continue staring at me like that?” Felicity asked, her voice husky from how dry her throat was.

“Until your husband is here.”

“And then?” Felicity asked.

The boy took the gun he had placed on the table, playing with it. “Then I am going to blow your head off.”

Felicity took in a deep breath. She had the urge to put her hand to her bump and reassure herself and the baby that they were okay, but her hands were tied together behind her back tightly.

“Who are you?” she asked him.

“If you don’t know by now, I am not going to tell you.”

“I think you have something to do with Slade Wilson,” Felicity stated.

She had listened to what he had told Oliver on the phone and his words of having the one Oliver loved most had immediately reminded her of Slade. It wasn’t especially a calming thought given who Slade Wilson was, what relationship he had to her family and what terrible things he had done and probably still wanted to do. He had killed so many people, including her mother-in-law. He had attempted to destroy the city. If the boy was even close as evil as his father, this wouldn’t end well.

“I just don’t understand,” Felicity said quietly. “Slade had a son, Joe, but he and his mother died in the crossfire when Slade should have been arrested. I-“

“I am his younger son,” the boy replied with cold voice. “My mother-“

He looked at her angrily, eying her up with a hate in his young eyes Felicity had barely ever seen. If he really was Slade Wilson’s son, he had all reason to hate him. She had been the one who had given him the antiserum that had enabled Oliver to defeat Slade which meant that she was at least partly responsible that he had ended up in that island prison.

“We will wait until your husband is here.”

Felicity looked at the boy. He didn’t look exactly lost, but Felicity felt like he was burying some deep pain under his anger. His fingers moved over the cold metal of the gun slowly, watching it with amazement in his eyes. And all Felicity could keep thinking was that he was a kid. That boy was just a kid. Kid shouldn’t feel pushed to do something like this, no matter how much they had been put through in their young lives already.

“You can still stop this,” Felicity told him gently. “If you stop this now, we will find a way to deal with everything that is going on. If you Oliver is here-“

“Then what?” he asked angrily, pointing the gun at her and releasing the safety catch. “He is going to save you despite the gun I am pointing at your face? It’s impossible to do so without risking that I blow your head off.”

Felicity looked at the boy intensely, but he held her gaze.

“A normal man can do the impossible to save the woman he loves,” Felicity explained with calm voice, still looking at him without flinching at the gun he pointed at her face. She made a pause, shaking her head. “My husband is no normal man.”

“Why? Because he’s the Arrow?”

“No,” a dark voice replied right behind Felicity after she heard a dull noise, telling her that Oliver had probably jumped down from one of the beams above her head. “It’s because I have lost so much already, I know exactly what I am willing to do to keep what I’ve got left.”

“You’d risk that I blow her head off?” the boy asked.

“Your finger wouldn’t get to twitch,” Oliver replied. “If you were older, you’d be dead already. I don’t react well to people trying to threaten my family. You’re a kid, though, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

Felicity turned her head, seeing Oliver stepping closer until he was on one lever with the chair she was tied to. She felt the leather of his suit jacket brush against her shoulder. Seeing him and feeling him so close to her calmed her down beyond belief. Oliver was here. He wasn’t wearing his mask and had the hood down like it had been when he had saved her from the Count all those years ago. He had come to her rescue then, and he had come to her rescue now. Everything was going to be alright.

“You don’t want to hurt me?” the boy asked, stepping closer with the gun still pointed at Felicity’s face. “You think you never hurt me before? Because of _you_ my mother never got the chance to take me back. Because of _you_ I never got the chance to get to know my dad or my half-brother! It’s _your_ fault they’ve been taken from me before I got to meet them!”

Felicity frowned. If he had been born right before Slade had stranded on Lian Yu and had never met his father because he had said to be dead before he could have met him, he would be around William’s age. He was a little older, though.

“What is your name?” Oliver asked her abductor, his voice softening slightly.

“Grant Wilson, son of Slade Wilson.”

Oliver nodded. “I was friends with your father before-“

“-you locked him into a prison island?”

Oliver narrowed his eyes at Slade’s son. “How do you know?”

“I just know,” he answered, almost spitted the words out. “And I know that it’s all your fault. My mom wanted to take me back when my father returned, but instead she died and so did my little brother. My aunt tried to hide it from me, but I found out. I found out that my mom gave me away because I was born when my dad was on a mission and she never told him about me. She didn’t want to take care of two kids on her own while he was always being away. I know she wanted to take me back when he returned from Lian Yu and had a job at a desk, though. After dad returned, she wanted-“

“Your father is a hateful man. You shouldn’t follow his-“

“You don’t get to tell me anything about my father!” Grant almost screamed, moving the gun closer to Felicity’s face.

If the way Oliver pulled back the bow even more was any indication, it didn’t stay unnoticed by him either.

“He wanted to take away whoever you love the most. Now I will do this. I will-“

“What if I can offer you a meeting with your father?”

Felicity flinched when the surprise of the offer made Grant Wilson lower the gun slightly, holding it right in front of her eyes.

“You can’t,” Wilson replied.

“Yes, I can,” Oliver assured him. “Even if I have to fly you there on my own, I will do that. If you meet him, you will see that following his footsteps is not something that’s worth throwing your life away.”

Felicity looked at Oliver, feeling her heart warming with pride. Oliver was not the remorseless killer he had thought he was when he had come back from the island. He had grown so much. If this had happened even a short while after their wedding, she had no doubt that he would have just killed Slade’s son as soon as he would have arrived here. Oliver was different now, though. He knew there wasn’t only black and white. He knew that though the boy was doing something terrible here that hurt Oliver, he might still deserve a second chance. He was only a kid, a kid that he been through too much in his young life and he still had so much of his life ahead of him. This shouldn’t cause him to lose it. Not if there was another way.

“If you want to meet your father, I will make it happen.”

“You’re lying,” Grant Wilson replied, but the gun in his hand lowered even more, pointing at Felicity’s chest now.

“No, I don’t,” Oliver stated firmly. “I always keep my promises and-“

A loud shot echoed through the empty warehouse. Felicity immediately squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting to see the blood coming from her stomach, telling her that she was injured badly and was losing the baby she had already taken deep into her heart. She wouldn’t be able to endure the pain of knowing that she was losing a part of her family. This loss…

“Who the hell are you?” she heard Oliver ask in front of her, telling her that he had moved to shield her body with his.

“We are from A.R.G.U.S.,” Felicity heard a foreign voice answer. “Grant Wilson will be taken into our custody.”

Slowly Felicity dared to open her eyes. She had wondered why she wasn’t feeling any pain and had thought that maybe it was because of the shock or because her wounds were just that bad. There wasn’t any blood coming from her stomach or any other part of her body, though.

When Felicity looked up, she saw why that was. Two men with broad shoulders were standing right over an unconscious Grant Wilson. He had a bleeding wound on his shoulder and a little dart in his neck. They seemed to have drugged him.

“Why?” Oliver asked. “He’s a child, and he barely did anything.”

“Agent Waller decided it,” one of the agents replied. “Given who his father is, A.R.G.U.S. doesn’t want to take a risk.”

“He is still just a kid,” Oliver replied.

“Well, Agent Waller doesn’t care what you think,” the agent replied, handcuffing the unconscious Wilson at his feet. “We will take him with us no matter what you will say.”

Felicity turned her gaze to Oliver. He shot Grant Wilson a last look before he quickly lowered his bow and turned to Felicity. He kneeled down in front of her chair and cut off the cable ties from around her ankles.

“Are you okay?” he asked, quickly checking her ankles for any wounds, but there was nothing but the slight cuts from the cable ties.

“Just free me,” Felicity whispered, focusing on Oliver’s face instead of the agents who were now taking her abductor out of the warehouse.

Oliver cut off the cable ties from around her wrists. As soon as Felicity was able to move, she threw herself at Oliver, putting her arms around his neck and hiding her face against the juncture of his neck and shoulder. Oliver straightened up, holding her tightly against him and lifting her feet from the floor.

“Are you okay?” he asked once more.

Felicity sobbed. “I think I am. I’m so sorry. He just surprised me in the underground parking at QI and I-“

“You have no reason to apologize,” Oliver assured her, tightening his arms around her. “This wasn’t your fault.”

“He’s Slade’s son,” Felicity whispered, only now really understanding the meaning.

“I know,” Oliver whispered, stroking his hand over her back gently.

When her body trembled because she felt so much colder than she had done before already, Oliver put her back to the floor. He quickly took of his jacket and put it around her shoulders. His hands rubbed over her arms, warming her.

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered, “for saving me.”

Oliver lifted his hands to her face, looking at her intensely. “You know that you don’t have to thank me for that.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered. “I want to, though.”

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her gently. He held her face in his hands, brushing his thumbs over her delicate skin. Felicity pressed herself closer to him, feeling his heartbeat against her chest. They were alive. Oliver was alive. She was alive. She took one of his hands from his cheek to her bump, holding it there. The baby was live too. She could feel it moving. She was only 16 weeks along, but given that this was her third pregnancy, she was a lot more sensitized.

“Let’s go home,” Oliver whispered. “Emmy and Tommy miss you already.”

 

 

As soon as they stepped into lair that night, Emmy and Tommy came running towards them. Felicity sank down onto her knees, hugging both of her kids tightly and holding them against her. Oliver just watched the scene, slowly feeling the tension and fear fading from his body.

Felicity was home and she was okay. His family was back together.

Taking in a deep breath, he went down onto his knees too and hugged all three of his loved ones tightly to him. He rested his nose against the crown of Felicity’s head, breathing in the scent of her hair.

Everything was going to be alright.

Once Emmy was able to let go of her mother, she hugged her daddy, whispering into his ear, “I knew you’d get her back.”

Oliver nodded more to himself than to her, whispering, “Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter in like 20 really short sittings, so this ended up being a little bit messy. Sorry for that. 
> 
> By the way, Grant Wilson has a high potential for being brought back into this fic in a big way later on. Just saying... 
> 
> Next chapter is a little bit of an aftermath. It probably won't be posted before Wednesday.


	164. All nightmare long

The second he felt the change beneath the palm of his right hand, Oliver opened his eyes alertly. His eyes adjusted to the darkness quickly, and he took in the sight of his family, lying with him in the bed. Since Felicity had been abducted by nobody else but Slade Wilson’s son last week, the kids always slept with them in bed. Neither Oliver nor Felicity could bear the thought of not having them close right now.

Oliver angled his head and pressed a firm kiss to the crown of his son’s head. Tommy was snuggled up to his chest. He had fallen asleep against Felicity’s stomach, but he had sleepily rolled himself over his sister during the night and snuggled up to his daddy then. Emmy was lying face down next to them, one hand resting on her mother’s cheek, the other holding one of her brother’s hands. At the pained expression on Felicity’s face, Oliver rubbed his hand up and down her spine gently, feeling her tense muscle under his touch.

Felicity hadn’t slept well the last nights. She had gotten out of the abduction almost physically unharmed. Except for some cuts where the cable ties had cut into the skin of her wrists and ankles, the abduction had left no bruises on her. The shock of what had happened and how much worse it could have ended, was still deep-seated in her heart.

Just like it was deep-seated in his heart. Since that night Oliver had barely been able to sleep. The thought of losing Felicity and the baby she was carrying was terrible. It was keeping him awake and alerted almost all the time, reliving the moment at the doctor’s when they had been to their last prenatal check-up a few days ago and gotten to listen to their baby’s heartbeat once more. They had known before already that the baby was fine because Felicity had felt it, but hearing the beat of the baby’s heart had given them so much more safety. Yet it wasn’t enough to make either of them forget that they could have lost the baby before they had gotten the chance to meet him or her.

When Felicity whimpered slightly in her sleep, Oliver carefully moved closer to her side of the bed, making sure Tommy didn’t wake up. Oliver moved his fingers under the fabric of Felicity’s shirt and rested his palm flat against her lower back. His fingertips moved on her warm skin slightly. Felicity took in a deep breath before releasing a low sigh. He watched her for a long moment, making sure she was sleeping calmly now.

The worry of what could have happened that night wasn’t the only thing keeping him awake, thought. There was a different worry, the worry of what could have happened with the whole way of how his past had gone had added to the sleeplessness of those last nights.

Grant Wilson had lost his way whatever that had been because of his father’s past. When he had found out that his mother had given him away without his father knowing and that she had planned on getting him back before she had been killed, he had tried to look for the reason why everything had been so screwed up. So of course on his search he had stumbled over Oliver’s name and blamed him for everything. Some of what Slade had been through probably had been his fault indeed. Oliver still didn’t know how Grant had found out so much about his father and what he had been through since his first time on Lian Yu, but somehow he had.

So the thought Oliver hadn’t been able to get out his thought was-

When Felicity whimpered once more, Oliver moved his hand a little higher on her back. Her muscles were terribly tense under his fingertips. This time she didn’t relax at his touch. Instead she whimpered once more, a deep frown forming on her forehead.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered into the dark quietly.

Again she whimpered, her hand starting to tremble where it was resting on Emmy’s stomach. Her legs moved slightly like they wanted to kick someone away.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered once more. “Honey, you’re safe. You’re home with me.”

His whisper didn’t seem to reach her, though. Her hand trembled even more and the rest of her body started to shake too. Her whimpers grew desperate.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered again.

He carefully pulled his arm away from under Tommy’s head and slid closer to the edge of the bed. Tommy released a sigh, turned his head to the other side and continued to sleep. Oliver meanwhile slid out of bed and hurried to the other side where Felicity was sleeping.

“Hon?” he whispered, putting one hand to her hip and the other to the crown of her head. He gently kissed the soft skin right under her ear. “Felicity, hon?”

Felicity’s body was still tense. Her whimpers had become quieter, but they were still there. Oliver hated when Felicity suffered from nightmares. He knew exactly how exhausting and frightening they could be, and he hated that Felicity had to go through that.

“Felicity, wake up, hon,” Oliver whispered into her ear once more. Felicity tensed a little more before she finally opened her eyes with a gasp for breath. Oliver leaned his lips against the shell of her ear, making her know he was right there beside her. “I’m here. You’re home. You’re safe. I’m here.”

“Oliver.”

“Yes, I’m here,” Oliver assured Felicity once more.

He took Emmy’s hand from Felicity’s face. The young girl turned onto her side with a sleepy sigh, snuggling up to her brother without waking up. Oliver pushed one arm under Felicity’s neck, the other under the back of her knees. As soon as he lifted Felicity into his arms, she put her arms around his neck and hid her face against the side of his neck, nuzzling his pulse point.

“Where are we going?” she whispered when Oliver started moving.

“Tommy’s nursery.”

“The kids-“

“-are safe where they are,” Oliver whispered against her hair and gently kissed her head. “Let’s just be alone for a moment, so we can both calm down.”

He tightened his hold on Felicity, and she kissed his pulse point in response. When they were in Tommy’s nursery, they sat down in the rocking chair with Felicity sitting in Oliver’s lap. Her head rested against his shoulder tiredly, her right hand was stroking gently over his naked chest. Oliver leaned his cheek against the crown of her head and closed his eyes. He felt her heartbeat slowing down and calmed down in response too.

“I’m sorry I woke you,” Felicity whispered after a while, bending her head back to look at Oliver with tired eyes.

“You didn’t wake me,” Oliver told her and kissed her forehead. “I didn’t sleep yet, and even if I did, it would be okay. I know how terrible nightmares can be. I wouldn’t want you to go through something like that alone.”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a sigh, lowering her gaze from his eyes to his chin and focusing on a little mole there. “I dreamt about the abduction, but it wasn’t Slade’s son, but he himself who took me. I don’t remember any details. I just remember that I have been very scared. I think he did something to the baby, and he threatened to kill me and-”

Oliver tightened his arm around her back, holding Felicity closer to him, and she fell silent in response. Oliver kissed the crown of her head, quietly stating, “You’re home.”

“I know.”

“And you’re safe.”

“I know.”

“I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know,” Felicity said once more, looking back up into his eyes. She took his left hand and put it to her bump. “We’re always safe when we’re with you.”

It was the second time in only one week that one of his girls stated such firm trust in him. The first had been Emmy when she had been so sure that he would get Felicity back. Emmy was so much like Felicity. Felicity thought otherwise, but it was the truth. His two girls were so similar. No wonder her loved Emmy so much!

He leaned forward and gently kissed Felicity. Her fingertips moved through his short stubble, gently stroking his cheek. Oliver pulled her bottom lip between both of his. After their lips parted he kissed her once more, only briefly though. He rested his forehead against hers, nuzzling her nose.

“You need to sleep,” Felicity whispered, putting her hand to his cheek.

Oliver knew from the tone of her voice that she didn’t mean he needed to sleep right now. It was more like a general statement. He needed to sleep.

“I can’t,” Oliver whispered. “When I close my eyes, I see you being tied to a chair, and usually in my dreams it doesn’t end as well as it did in reality. I don’t get to safe you and you and the baby die, or Grant shoots you in the stomach and we lose the baby, so...”

“I know,” Felicity replied, straightening up a little bit. She gently kissed the underside of his jaw. “We are here and safe, though.”

Oliver smiled at how she reassured him now like he had reassured her before. Neither of them really was okay after what had happened, and yet they had the strength to try to reassure the other one. He knew that after years of being married he should probably be used to it, but sometimes he was still amazed by how much he genuinely loved and adored Felicity. He didn’t know what he’d do without her.

“If anything would have happened to you or to her-“

“To her?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow. “It might be a boy.”

“I refuse to even consider that option until the doctor will tell us.”

“It’s going to be long twenty-three weeks then,” Felicity replied with a sigh.

“Twenty-three?” he asked. “Why? I thought we were going to ask the doctor at the next appointment.”

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “Last time was an exception because we had already found the perfect name for a girl when-“

“Don’t remind me,” Oliver quickly interrupted her.

He remembered way to well what had happened. They had just decided on a perfect name, Madeleine Grace, when Thea had reminded them that Oliver had once slept with a girl of the same name. He and Felicity had been unable to find another girl’s name they could both agree on. Luckily, it had been unnecessary because Felicity had asked the doctor about the baby’s sex, and it had turned out to be a boy. They had had no problem with finding a name for him. He felt like even now they wouldn’t have any problem finding a name for a boy. Somehow that was just easier for them.

“We didn’t do this in a long time.”

Oliver looked at her in question. “What do you mean?”

“Sitting in a rocking chair in the middle of the night and cuddling,” Felicity replied. “I just realized how much I missed this.”

“Well, soon we will get to do it again regularly,” Oliver replied, stroking his hand over the bump. He hated that he wasn’t able to feel the baby move yet. He couldn’t wait for that to happen. “When the kids were little, we almost did this every night.”

“Yes, we did,” Felicity whispered. “Emmy wouldn’t fall asleep otherwise.”

“And we fell asleep here so often it was almost like a second bed for us.”

Oliver and Felicity both smiled at the memory. Emmy had never appreciated sleeping alone in her bed. When she had been a baby, she had taken care that her parents were going to hold her all night. Now she was crawling into Tommy’s bed all the time.

“It was great.”

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a smile. “It really was.”

Spending quiet moments with Felicity was one of his favorite things to do. He loved doing nothing with her. He and Felicity shared a bond stronger and they felt a love deeper for one another than any words could say or silence could make awkward.

“We should go back to bed,” Felicity whispered. “I will lie safely right at the other end of the mattress.”

Oliver chuckled. “Eventually we will have to send the kids back to their bed, but not yet.”

“No, not yet,” Felicity agreed with a chuckle. “Come on, we-“

“Felicity?” Oliver asked, holding her to him when she tried to get up. Felicity turned back around to him, perking up her eyebrows. Oliver looked at her for a moment before he added, “Can I ask you something?”

“Always,” Felicity replied.

“I… uhm…”

Oliver looked down at his hand on her bump, stroking his fingers over the fabric of Felicity’s top. He frowned, thinking about how to say what had kept him awake those last nights apart from the nightmares he had had. He knew that telling Felicity and talking to her about it was what he would need to clear his thoughts. He just wasn’t sure how to say what exactly worried him since he had met Grant Wilson.

“Hon?” Felicity asked quietly, stroking her hand over the back of his head and down his neck.

Sighing, Oliver bent his head back and looked at Felicity. Her eyes were full of love and patience. They didn’t urge him to tell her what was going on if he wasn’t ready, but they also told him that he could tell her once he was ready.

“Do you think what happened to Grant would have happened to William if I had continued with being the Hood?”

Felicity frowned. “I think I don’t understand what-“

“Grant Wilson wants to avenge his mother’s and half-brother’s death and… get revenge for his father. He thinks his life would have been better if he had grown up with his biological parents and…” Oliver sighed. “I know the situation is very different, but it made me think. If I had continued to go on with being the Hood, a remorseless killer, I would have probably ended up dead within a few years. It just made me wonder what would have happened to William then. Would he have turned into a killer, being angry at the world for taking the father he had never known away from him?”

Felicity took in a deep breath. “That’s an interesting thought.”

Oliver chuckled sadly. “I don’t know if I’d say it like that. And you know what, it really doesn’t matter. Let’s just-“

“No, it’s a good question, especially since it is keeping you awake,” Felicity replied. She put her hand to his on the bump and took in another deep breath. “I… uhm… I think that you are right and the situation is really different. Even as the Hood you actually were a good person. What you did, you did to honor your father’s dying wish and to make this city a better place. It wasn’t personal revenge that drove you to do what you did, and despite what you might think, I highly doubt that you have been remorseless because otherwise you would have never given up on being the Hood and continued being him even after Tommy’s death.”

“So you’re saying that it wouldn’t have happened.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I think that the situations are different, and we don’t know what would have happened. What’s even more important, though, is that we don’t even need to know what would have happened. There are so many _what-could-have-been_ s or _what-would-have-been_ s. What would have been if you had never gone on the Gambit? What would have been if we had never met? What would have been if we hadn’t gotten married this early into our relationship? What would have been if we hadn’t been able to have kids? What would have been if you had never met William?”

Oliver nodded slowly. Each day brought like thousands of new _what-could-have-been_ s with it. Every decision was a step into one direction. Every other decision would have led them somewhere else.

“We are where we are now, though, and that means that this what-if in your head is nothing you have to think about,” Felicity continued. Smiling, she leaned forward and kissed Oliver’s forehead. “You are a great dad to all of your kids, and you teach them the meaning of words like love and mercy and forgiveness. That is what is, and that is all that matters. Does that make sense?”

Oliver smiled and gently kissed Felicity’s soft lips. “I knew you’d know exactly what I needed to hear.”

“So it does make sense?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, absolutely. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me.”

Sighing, Oliver rested his head back and watched Felicity. She was smiling at him slightly, her loving eyes locked on his. He had known that Felicity would be able to help with what had been on his mind. He had already thought that it was redundant to think about it, but only know that Felicity had agreed he was sure that he had been right all along.

“Do you know how much I love you?” Oliver asked.

Felicity gently kissed Oliver’s lips. When she pulled back, she was smiling at him. “I know how much I love you, so…”

“We kind of hit the jackpot with finding each other, didn’t we?” Oliver asked, feeling once again overwhelmed with how much he loved Felicity.

“Yes, we did,” Felicity replied. She pecked his lips once more. “Let’s go back to bed.”

“No, let’s stay here for just one moment longer,” Oliver suggested.

Felicity leaned her forehead against his. “Okay. One moment longer.”


	165. A matter of trust

“We are not going to stay long, right?”

Felicity chuckled, turning her head to look at her husband, who stood right beside her with his arm wrapped around her waist. “Oliver, we just got here.”

“I know,” he replied with a teasing smile, “and I’m not saying that we should go back home already. I just want to make sure that we are not staying too long because you are pregnant and you need rest.”

“Oh really?” Felicity asked, cocking her head at him. “And it doesn’t have anything to do with the promise I gave you?”

“What promise?” Oliver asked innocently. “I don’t remember any. I am just worried about your and the baby’s wellbeing.”

Felicity bit her tongue, stopping herself from laughing. During their ride on the back of the limousine, Oliver’s hand had snuck under the fabric of her dress and gently stroked the inside of her thigh. When his fingers had stroked over the fabric of her panties, she had stopped him, though. Felicity had put him off until later, promising they could have as much sex as he wanted once they had left the gala. With the 45 minutes ride they would need home and the night they had without the kids, there would be enough time for them to have some fun after the gala.

“We are going to stay until I talked to everyone important,” Felicity told him, gently patting his chest when Oliver sighed in disappointment. “You know the rules, babe. First the work, then the fun.”

Smiling, she straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed him gently. Oliver sighed against her lips, tightening his arm around her waist to pull her even closer against his broad chest. Felicity felt a tingling in her stomach. Though she knew that Oliver couldn’t feel it yet, she put one of his hands to her bump, holding it against where she could feel their baby moving.

When their lips parted, Oliver lowered his gaze down to their hands. He moved his fingers over the bump slightly before he looked back up at Felicity. “Time for a dance?”

Felicity smiled. “You’re really suggesting that we dance? You won’t find me another partner to dance with? I also don’t have to beg you for it?”

“I’m absolutely in for a dance,” Oliver replied, taking one of her hands and linking his fingers with his. “If we have to be here, I can at least make sure you notice that I am a really attentive husband.”

“You think that is going to help you to get what you want when we are done here?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow.

Oliver made an innocent face. “Do you really think I have second thoughts here?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied without hesitation.

“Well, that’s probably because you know me way too well,” Oliver replied with a quiet chuckle. He kissed her temple and squeezed her fingers. Then he lowered his lips to her ear, whispering, “Do you want to dance now?”

In the back of her mind Felicity knew that she had come here for work reasons. This gala was a chance to talk to some people that could help her make Queen Industries even more successful than it already was. Just like the project with Wayne Enterprise had helped her to get Queen Industries to where it was right now. Yet she knew that being here only for work reasons would be no fun. Besides, you didn’t bring a man like Oliver Queen to a gala didn’t show all the other women present that he belonged to you.

“I would love to dance,” Felicity replied.

Oliver lifted her hand to his lips and kissed the back of her hand. He smiled at her lovingly, nodding his head towards the dance floor. Felicity moved closer to him, leaning into his side. They just turned around to head to the dance floor when-

“Ray.”

“Felicity. Oliver. What a nice surprise,” Ray stated with a smile, standing right in front of them. “I didn’t know you were going to be here, and- Felicity, wow!”

Felicity released a breathy chuckle. Ray’s eyes were focused on the baby bump that was definitely showing under the fabric of her red dress. She had told her family and friends about the pregnancy weeks ago, but she hadn’t seen Ray in awhile. That was why he hadn’t known about the pregnancy until just now.

“Congratulations.”

Ray spread his arms to hug Felicity. She quickly glanced at Oliver and almost narrowed her eyes at how relaxed he seemed. She didn’t get the chance, though. Ray was already pulling her into a hug.

She knew that Ray was and would probably always be a sore spot for Oliver. After Oliver had rejected her all those years ago, she had tried to be happy with Ray, but of course he had never been able to make her feel like Oliver had made her feel and still continued to make her feel after years of marriage now. Only a year ago Oliver’s insecurities had driven him to accuse her of cheating with Ray after some misleading photos of her and Ray had been printed on the covers of some gossip magazines. Felicity knew that if it had been any other man she had been photographed with, it probably wouldn’t have happened. Something about Ray just seemed to challenge something in Oliver.

When Ray let go of her again, Felicity quickly stepped back. She shot a glance at Oliver, but he smiled at ease.

“Congratulations to you too of course,” Ray said to Oliver, holding out his hand to him.

Oliver took Ray’s hand and shook it with a smile. “Thank you. We are very happy about this news.”

“Who wouldn’t be?” Ray asked. “How far along are you?”

“The eighteenth week just started,” Felicity replied with a smile, linking her fingers with Oliver’s and leaning her head against his shoulder. “We are almost halfway through the pregnancy which is just as amazing as scaring.”

Oliver pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, spending silent comfort. After the pregnancy with Tommy had started so troublesomely with the depression and ended too abruptly with Felicity falling down the stairs, they needed every second they had before this baby was going to be born. Besides, it was the last time they got to enjoy all the fun of Felicity’s pregnancy.

“And what are you doing?” Oliver asked Ray. “Still traveling by suit?”

“Yes,” Ray replied with a chuckle, taking a quick look around to make sure nobody had overheard that part of their conversation. “When I got the invitation for this gala, I thought it was a nice way to meet some old partners and friends again. I already got an invitation for a technology fair in February in New York. You should come there too, Felicity. I remember we had a great weekend at a tech fair with Cisco when you were pregnant with Tommy.”

“Oh, I remember,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “Karma paid back badly by giving Emmy chickenpox which I never had and hence needed to stay away. I didn’t see my family in weeks. So that’s a nice idea, but I think I have to pass and-“

“Why? That sounds like a fun idea,” Oliver interrupted Felicity.

She turned her head, frowning at him. He hadn’t been exactly happy when she had decided to go to that tech fair two years ago. He hadn’t talked her out of it or made her feel guilty for leaving him and Emmy alone for the weekend. He just hadn’t been exactly excited about it either.

“Well, I’ll be eight months pregnant in February.”

“If I remember correctly, that was the month you were feeling the best when you were pregnant with Emmy,” he replied. “Besides, we both know how much you would love going there. You’re into that kind of stuff and doesn’t QI introduce something new there too?”

“No, that’s the tech fair in July in Los Angeles.”

“Oh, I must have mixed that up,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, shooting Ray a short glance. “Anyway, you should go. It’s going to be a lot of fun for you.”

Felicity’s frown deepened. Oliver seemed to be absolutely okay with the idea that she would spend a weekend away and go to that tech fair with Ray. It wasn’t like she didn’t want to go. She was sure that it really was going to be fun, but it just didn’t feel right.

“You can just think about it,” Ray eventually offered, probably feeling awkward with how Oliver and Felicity were just looking at each other and having a conversation that needed no words. “I… have a few other people to talk to, so…”

“It was nice meeting you again, Ray,” Oliver said and turned his head, breaking eye-contact with Felicity.

“It was nice meeting the two of you too,” Ray replied with a smile before he turned around and went towards the bar.

Felicity’s eyes were on Oliver’s face again, trying to look for any sign of discomfort or whatever, but Oliver still looked relaxed. He stroked the palm of his hand over her lower back when he turned back around to her, smiling at her contently.

“Do you want something to drink or would you like to dance with me now?”

“I am not thirsty.”

“It’s the dance then,” Oliver replied.

Felicity was about to say something, but Oliver already took her hand and pulled her with him towards the dance floor. Felicity didn’t stop him from taking her with him. Instead she followed him towards the middle of the dance floor where he lifted their linked fingers a little bit and wrapped his other arm around her waist, pulling her against him. Felicity moved her hand through the short hair at the bottom of his neck and gently scratched his scalp.

Oliver smiled down at her softly when he started to move in time to the slow music. She loved dancing with Oliver because as much as he insisted on not being a good dance, Felicity enjoyed swaying to the music with him just as much. She’d rather swayed with him than really danced with anyone else.

“You are staring at me,” Oliver stated after awhile. He stroked his hand over her lower back and brushed his lips against her forehead. “Everything alright?”

“I am just thinking,” Felicity replied, not taking her eyes off him.

“About?”

“About the fact that you are trying to get rid of me.”

Oliver frowned. “I am not trying to get rid of you.”

“Of course you are,” Felicity replied. “You just tried convincing me to spend a weekend in New York.”

“Yes, because it would be something you’d enjoy,” Oliver answered and kissed the tip of her nose. “You’d enjoy being there, so you should go. Besides, it’s only a weekend. It’s not like you will be away forever.”

Felicity frowned even more, eying up Oliver’s face. She had hated when he had gotten jealous during their fight one year ago because it had been stupid then. She had to admit that she wasn’t exactly happy with Oliver’s behavior now either. It was certainly better than his hurtful reproach, but she didn’t exactly like that he was trying to convince her to spend time away.

Biting her tongue, Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s shoulder. She snuggled closer to him, lowering her face, so he couldn’t see the sadness there. She knew it was stupid and she should be happy that he was okay if she spent time with Ray because he was still her friend after all. She just didn’t exactly like _that_ he was that okay, and yes, she knew exactly how stupid that was.

“I don’t like when you’re not with me,” Oliver whispered and Felicity pulled back a little, so she could look at him, “but I trust you, Felicity. Ray is your friend, and I am sure that you’d have fun at the tech fair with him because you can talk to each other about those things in a way that we can’t. I can’t talk about those things because I don’t know any of this. It’s okay that I can’t. I just want you to enjoy tech stuff like you do, and if that means spending one weekend without you, I am okay.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at Oliver slightly. “Does this have anything to do with the fight we had about me spending time with Ray last year?”

Oliver held her gaze for two seconds before he lowered his eyes to somewhere between them. “I need you to know that I trust you.”

“I do know that,” Felicity assured. “We wouldn’t have another baby, if I didn’t. You don’t need to prove anything to me.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “You’re right, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to send you away. You know how bad I feel when I am not around you. Yet I think you should go because I am sure that you would enjoy that fun.”

“Well, there is a simple solution to that,” Felicity replied, resting her chin on Oliver’s chest and smiling up at him. “You just come with me.”

“To a tech fair?” Oliver chuckled. “Felicity, you know that I love you, but I don’t think I love you that much.”

“You mean you love me too much to ruin it for me by asking when we are finally going to leave?” Felicity asked back, cocking her head.

She knew Oliver. He could listen to her babbling about tech stuff for hours, and he would never take his eyes off her or show that he might be bored. He always listened to each of her words even if he barely understood anything. Oliver wasn’t able to add anything to a conversation like that, though, and he knew that sometimes she needed someone to reply to her.

“Busted,” Oliver whispered with a chuckle. He pecked her lips gently. “You should go there with someone you can really talk to about that stuff.”

“Well, I could go to the tech fair with Ray and take you with me to New York nonetheless,” Felicity replied. “We take the kids and spend a few days there. It’s going to be fun. You have the kids to spend the day with when I am on the tech fair, and I’ll join you when I can. And of course we have the nights together.”

Oliver smiled. “That sounds like a great idea.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, absolutely.”

“Then we’ll do it,” Felicity replied.

She quickly straightened up onto the tip of her toes, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed Oliver gently. When their lips parted, Felicity rested her forehead against Oliver’s. She smiled with her eyes closed while Oliver was moving his hands from her lower back slowly upwards to her shoulder blades and then back down again. Felicity pecked Oliver’s lips once more before she lowered herself back down to her entire feet and started dancing with him again.

“Everything alright again now?” Oliver asked. Felicity perked up her eyebrows, so Oliver added, “You seemed sad before.”

“I was-,” Felicity began. She made a pause, chuckling slightly. “I was just a little bit disappointed.”

“Because you felt like I was trying to get rid of you for a weekend?”

“That,” Felicity replied, “and because that meant that you weren’t jealous at all.”

“You don’t like when I am jealous,” Oliver replied, frowning at her.

“I don’t like when you’re jealous-jealous, but it’s great when you’re jealous,” Felicity explained.

Oliver perked up an eyebrow, looking at her with an amused smile. Given how his fingers grazed the scarred skin of her shoulder, Felicity was sure he relived the same memory as she did. The night she had taken the bullet for Sara, she had told him how she felt like she wasn’t his girl anymore, specifying that of course he didn’t mean to say that she was his girl-girl. Felicity chuckled at that memory and rested her forehead against Oliver’s chest for a moment.

“So what do you mean?” Oliver asked when Felicity looked back at him. “What kind of jealousy do you like?”

“Let’s just say that I don’t like the jealous-jealous one.”

“Felicity, you are not helping,” Oliver told her with a chuckle and kissed her forehead.

“I just don’t like when it’s a serious kind of jealousy,” Felicity explained with a sigh. “I don’t want to be accused of cheating or whatever. If you pretend to be jealous and use it for some teasing, though, that’s always fine with me.”

“So if I go over there and teasingly punch Palmer’s face, that was alright?” Oliver asked with a wide grin on his face.

“Maybe that’s a little much,” Felicity replied.

“Yeah, you are just no fun,” Oliver said with a chuckle. He kissed her forehead gently before he lowered his lips to her ear and whispered with hoarse voice, “How about when we go home, I will leave my marks all over your body to make sure every other guy knows that you are mine?”

Felicity purred like a kitten when she leaned against Oliver’s muscular chest. She licked her lips and felt wetness pooling between her thighs at how Oliver’s gaze flickered to her lips before he licked his own in response.

“See?” she asked. “That is the kind of jealousy I enjoy.”

Oliver chuckled and pecked her lips. “I think I can offer that from time to time.”

Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder, continuing to dance with him in silence. She loved that they had the kind of marriage that allowed them to talk about everything. She loved everything about her relationship to Oliver, from the little things like the way he looked at her up to the important things like this.

Sex when Oliver was jealous or at least teasing her about jealousy was definitely on the list of those things too. He was always a little rougher then, licking and nibbling every part of her body. He left his marks all over her skin. Felicity knew that she shouldn’t like this slightly primitive behavior, but she did enjoy it so much. She also liked marking his body as hers. They both knew it wasn’t necessary to mark the other as theirs because they truly belonged to each other, but they liked it nonetheless.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Let’s go home,” Felicity suggested, smiling at him.

Oliver frowned. “We just came here, and you didn’t talk to anyone but Ray yet. What happened to ‘First the work, then the fun’?”

“I’m pregnant. I shouldn’t work that much anyway.”

Oliver puckered his lips. “And it doesn’t have anything to do with what I whispered into your ear before?”

“No,” Felicity replied, smiling sheepishly. She moved her hands over his chest, playing with the edges of the suspenders. “It’s just the hormones. Take the offer to go home now or stay here for a few hours.”

Oliver smiled and kissed Felicity gently. “Let’s go home.”

Holding her hand, he led her away from the dance floor and towards the exit. Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder on their way and sighed contently.

“Hey, do you want to say goodbye to Ray before we leave because he is- oh, wow.”

Felicity opened her eyes, looking at Oliver’s surprised face. “Huh? What’s going on?”

Oliver nodded towards the bar. When Felicity followed his gaze, she found Ray at the bar. He stood right in front of a dark-haired woman, one arm casually wrapped around her waist. The model-like beauty was smiling at him, and Ray leaned down and kissed her.

“Did you know he has a girlfriend?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shook her head. “Nope, but I am happy for him.”

“So am I.” When Felicity looked at Oliver with narrowed eyes, he chuckled. Squeezing her fingers in his hand, he kissed her cheek and added in a whisper, “Or at least I am happy for myself.”

Felicity rolled her eyes with a chuckle, nodding towards the exit. “Come on. Let’s go.”


	166. Midnight cravings

Felicity took in a deep breath, trying to focus on where she had stopped counting sheep when the baby’s soft kicks had interrupted her. Had it been the 236th sheep or the 362th? She just couldn’t remember. With a low sigh Felicity considered starting over again, but she knew that counting sheep was not going to help her falling asleep. It barely ever had.

She slowly moved her fingers through Oliver’s short hair, enjoying the way he pressed his nose against her skin and breathed her in. His head was resting on her chest, his body snuggled to her side. One of his strong arms lay across her body, making it impossible for her to get out of bed without him realizing.

Sighing, Felicity newly discovered the scars on Oliver’s back. She brushed her fingertips unerringly against each scar, remembering exactly where they were. She knew Oliver and his body in her bones. If she could draw, she could easily make a drawing of his body that couldn’t be more detailed if it was a photo.

Felicity loved everything about Oliver. His body was definitely the icing on the cake and just as yummy. She had always enjoyed his body. She had even done so when they hadn’t been together yet, and all she had been allowed to do was watching him doing the salmon ladder in the lair. As their relationship had deepened, she had been allowed to use more than her eyes to get to know his body. She had touched it, kissed it and licked it until she had memorized each cell of it.

With the fulfillment of Oliver’s sexual fantasies in the last months she had even found a new way to enjoy his body even more by experiencing even more about what Oliver liked and didn’t like and how his body reacted to different sexual scenarios. If she could, she would make a study out of it that she would happily spend the rest of her life with. Besides, fulfilling those wishes had just been amazing which reminded her…

“Oliver?” Felicity whispered.

Her eyes were adjusted to the dark, so Felicity could see his eyes snapping open immediately. He propped himself up on one forearm and looked at her.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes, sure,” Felicity replied. “Did you sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Oh,” Felicity made, feeling guilty for waking him given how hard falling asleep sometimes still was for him. “Oh, then don’t mind. Just go back to sleep.”

She quickly pecked his lips and slid closer to him. They were both lying on their sides, so when she snuggled up to him, their chest pressed against each other’s. In the twentieth week of pregnancy the bump was now big enough to stop her from getting as close to Oliver as she wanted to. Oliver put an arm around, encompassing her in the warmth of his body, and that made up for not being able to move closer to him.

Felicity sighed, tapping her fingertips against Oliver’s naked chest. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon. Her thoughts were running wild for whatever reason, and she knew they wouldn’t stop. If it was up to her, she would get out of bed and busy herself with her tablet. She knew that she couldn’t, though. Oliver wouldn’t sleep as long as she wasn’t in bed with him, and she didn’t want to take away the little of sleep he got. More than five years into their marriage he had grown comfortable to fall asleep deeply, but she knew he wouldn’t if she wasn’t lying safely beside him. It looked like she would have to stay in bed and be bored to hell, Felicity figured with another sigh.

“Felicity, what is going on?”

“Nothing,” Felicity replied quickly and pressed her lips together, reminding herself to stay quiet. “Just continue sleeping.”

“I’m awake now.”

“Then just go back to sleep,” Felicity suggested. “I’ll be quiet.”

Sighing, Oliver reached out his hand for the lamp on his nightstand behind him and switched on the light. Felicity groaned at the dazzling light, screwing her eyes shut and hiding her face against Oliver’s chest. He rubbed her back for a moment before he gently took her face in his hands and angled her head, so she was looking at him.

“What’s going on?”

“I can’t sleep,” she replied.

Oliver brushed his lips against hers gently. “Any chance I can help with that?”

“Well, I am thinking about something,” Felicity explained honestly, “and I could use your insight on it.”

“Oh, okay,” Oliver replied, obviously surprised. “Tell me.”

“Okay, you remember that we did this thing with the five envelopes to fulfill wishes, right?” Felicity asked. Oliver perked up his eyebrow suspiciously, but he nodded. “So I was wondering what do you think which of these wishes was the one during that we made the baby?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, waiting for Oliver’s answer expectantly. Her husband just continued to stare at her, though.

“That is why you woke me?” he asked after awhile.

“No,” she replied immediately. “I woke you because I couldn’t sleep. I asked you because you wanted to help.”

Oliver chuckled lowly, shaking his head. He brushed his lips against her forehead before he explained, “Felicity, we used the last envelope during our wedding anniversary which was in March. Now it’s October and you are only twenty weeks along. We didn’t make a baby with a wish which I guess you know because you are really smart.”

“I absolutely am,” Felicity said with a smile. “The smartest of them all.”

“I won’t object to that,” Oliver whispered. He kissed her gently, stroking his hand over her hair. “Can you sleep now?”

“No,” Felicity replied immediately. “I want to know what fantasy you would have liked to be responsible for this small banana.”

“A small banana?”

“That’s the size of the baby right now,” Felicity replied quickly. “I don’t really get why they chose a small banana to describe the size. I am sure there were vegetables or fruits that didn’t have to be restricted to small samples, so why choose small bananas? Anyway, which wish would it be?”

“The last one.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “The last one, really?”

“Yes, of course,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “It was a redo of our first night together, and it was during our anniversary. That easily makes it my favorite wish.”

“Hm,” Felicity made, scrunching up her nose.

Oliver perked up his eyebrow. “I guess it’s not what you wanted to hear?”

“It’s kind of boring,” Felicity replied, “and actually so predictable.”

“Well, that is my answer nonetheless,” Oliver told her and kissed the tip of her nose. He stroked his warm hand over the bump, asking, “What wish would you have preferred?”

“I don’t know. Let me think about it. We had the Bratva wish. Then we had sex in the open. I blindfolded you. We had sex in the office and finally the redo,” she remembered. She narrowed her eyes a little bit and bit down on her bottom lip, concentrating on which one she liked most. I think it’s the one with the blindfold because of the utter trust you had in me to let me- No, wait! The office sex was even better because it reminded me on our old times and how much I wanted to have sex with you then already. The one with the Bratva was very hot, though. We traveled across the world to have sex. That is something that should be remembered, but… You know what? It’s not important. You were right.”

Felicity pecked Oliver’s lips and lay back down with her face against his chest. Oliver chuckled, pressed a kiss to the crown of her head and switched off the light.

“Good night, Felicity.”

“Night, Oliver,” Felicity whispered back and kissed his collarbone while Oliver was tightening his arm around her waist.

She knew that after years of being with him and being married to him and building a family with him she should be used to it, but sometimes she was still amazed by what they had now. They had started with stupid lies about a bullet-ridden laptop and alleged energy drinks in a syringe. Then Felicity had joined Diggle and him in the foundry, but had only meant to stay until they had found Walter. During countless nights at the work station and several team meeting at Big Belly Burger she had changed her mind, though.

Big Belly Burger, Felicity thought with an inaudible sigh. She loved their burgers and their fries. They were just the best. Since Oliver had discovered cooking, they hadn’t eaten often there. Oliver appreciated healthy meals very much which almost made her wish he had never discovered cooking. She was all in for giving the children healthy food, but she didn’t exactly want to serve as their role model, at least not for that. Oliver was lucky that he was an amazing cook because otherwise Felicity would honestly consider to revolt against his diet plans.

“Oliver?” Felicity whispered.

“Hm?”

“Have you been asleep again?”

Oliver sighed. “I am not going to have that conversation with you again. I am awake now, so just tell me what’s going on?”

She loved how Oliver’s voice didn’t sound annoyed or anything. Instead the low whisper sounded gentle and understanding.

“I’m hungry,” Felicity said with slightly whiney voice.

Oliver chuckled and kissed her forehead. “I’ll see what our fridge holds for midnight cravings.”

“No, I want a burger,” Felicity hurried to say, “Big Belly cheeseburger with double cheese and extra garlic. Please, please, please, please, please!”

Oliver chuckled once more. “You know I can’t resist you when you are pleading with me like that.”

“So that’s a yes?”

“That’s a yes.”

“You are without any doubt the best husband in the world,” Felicity stated, framing Oliver’s face with her hands. She pressed a long kiss to his lips in wordless gratitude. “You really are the best.”

“Of course I am,” Oliver replied, about to leaning back in once more, but Felicity put her hands to his chest and pushed him away.

“You get another kiss when I have the food.”

“I better hurry then.”

Oliver switched on the light once more and quickly climbed out of bed. Felicity watched him getting into some clothes, shamelessly admiring the perfect curve of his ass in the tight boxer briefs when he leaned down to put on the pants. When he sat down on the edge of the bed to put on his boots, Felicity crawled over towards him and kissed his cheek from behind.

“Cheeseburger with double cheese and extra garlic,” she reminded him in a whisper. “You won’t forget, right?”

“Would I dare to?” Oliver asked, glancing back at her over his shoulder.

Felicity chuckled. “Probably not.”

“I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Oh, don’t forget the keys,” Felicity hurried to say when Oliver was already halfway out of the room. “You left them here when-“

“I’ll take the motorcycle,” Oliver interrupted her. “I’ll be faster that way.”

“Oliver?” He turned around in the doorframe, looking at her with perked up eyebrows. “Be careful, okay? Getting you back in one piece is more important than the food still being warm when you’re back.”

“I love you too,” Oliver simply replied to that with a smile. When she blew him a kiss, he caught it in the air and put it to the breast pocket of his leather jacket. “I’ll save that one for bad times.”

He winked at her and left. Felicity meanwhile let herself fall backwards into the pillows with a quiet chuckle. She remembered the times when Oliver’s PTSD had been at its worst and he had thought that he couldn’t be with anyone he could care about. Even thinking about it now was still giving her heart a little stitch.

Sighing, she sat up and crawled out of bed. She grabbed one of Oliver’s hoodies on her way out and quickly pulled it over. It was quite cold for the middle of November lately, and Felicity found herself feeling chilly rather often than not. Thank God, her husband wasn’t only her personal food deliverer; he was also her personalized thermal blanket.

She remembered when he had brought her food the first time. It had been a tough night in the Arrow cave, and he had known that it had weighed hard on her. That was why on his way back to the Arrow cave, he had quickly asked John to get some Chinese take-out. Over Chinese noodles they had discussed what had gone wrong that night, and Oliver had assured her that she hadn’t done anything wrong. It had been one of those few nights Felicity had taken Oliver’s offer of telling him about her day when she had needed to.

The Chinese noodles had been delicious, Felicity remembered. Not wasting a second, she reached out her hand for the phone and blindly dialed Oliver’s number. It only took him two seconds to pick up.

“I hope you are not taking this call while being on your motorcycle.”

“Felicity, relax. I’m multitasking.”

“So you’re not at Big Belly yet?”

“Nope, I am no. Why?”

“I think I want Chinese instead,” Felicity replied, “noodles with fried chicken and vegetables. See? Vegetables are very healthy.”

“I doubt they are still healthy when they took a bath in oil,” Oliver explained, “but since you are pregnant and deserve everything you want, I’ll get you whatever your stomach desires right now.”

“Well, Chinese noodles with fried chicken and vegetables it is then.”

“Alright,” Oliver answered. “See you later.”

“Yes, bye.”

Smiling, Felicity went over to the kitchen counter. She put the phone away and poured herself a glass of water.

Only now Oliver’s words on the phone caught up to her. When he had finally gotten over the insecurities about the dangers of his vigilante life -- or actually gotten his head out of his ass as Felicity liked to call it -- he had asked her out for dinner. Late he had made plans about their dinner date with her over the phone. He had been on his motorcycle then, in the middle of a highspeed chase to be exact, asking her if she like Italian.

Felicity remembered how nervous she had been during the first minutes of the date. She had known Oliver for almost two years by then, but dating him had still made her so nervous. She barely ever got nervous around him anymore, but that first dinner had just freaked her out so much. She had been utterly in love with him back then already.

Sometimes she wondered how their life had continued if they had actually gotten to the dinner part of their date. Would they have gotten married that soon into their relationship nonetheless? Would they have taken more time? Would they still be married with two kids and a third on its way now? Would they know William? It didn’t matter because no matter that obstacles life had thrown at them, they were where they were right now and that was good. Hadn’t she told Oliver something similar a few weeks ago?

Anyway, she would have liked to try the champignon lasagna the restaurant had offered.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, reaching out her hand for the phone once more. Again she dialed Oliver’s number quickly and again it only took him seconds to take the call.

“Hey, are you at the restaurant already?”

“No,” Oliver replied. “I guess you made up your decision again?”

“Hey, don’t blame me. It’s the baby. Besides, if it was me, I am excused because I am pregnant which would actually mean that it’s the baby again, doesn’t it?”

Oliver chuckled. “I am not blaming anyone. What can I get you, hon?”

“Champignon lasagna from the restaurant we had our first date?” Felicity asked. “I know it’s a long way, but-“

“Don’t worry,” Oliver replied gently. “Anything for you.”

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. See you in a few minutes.”

Felicity hung up with a smile. Oliver really was the best. She doubted that there were a lot of husbands who let their wives, pregnant or not, chase them across the city for food. Oliver didn’t even complain that she had woken him and she changed her mind about what she wanted each few minutes. It was definitely one of the many things she loved about him.

How many women could say that they had a husband who outright enjoyed spoiling them? For Oliver it wasn’t only about giving her a special day. He just enjoyed the smile she gave him when he did things for her and he loved giving her back for everything he felt she had done for him over the years.

“Baby, are you making me feel this sappy and nostalgic tonight?” Felicity asked with a sigh, continuing to stroke her hand over her bump. “I’m turning into your father. You know, on a scale from broody to sappy he basically owns every shade of emotion.”

It was one more thing to love about Oliver. He could be very funny, but also oh so serious, and he was by far the most caring person she had ever met. He cared about her and their family more than anything else. When she had a bad day, he would run a bath for her and listen to how terrible her day had been and then he would head out and get her a lava chocolate cake, or even bake her one, just to make her feel better.

“Okay, your daddy might leave me after tonight,” Felicity whispered to the baby, “but I can promise that he is never going to leave you.”

She always teased Oliver when he was talking to the bump though the baby’s hearing hadn’t completely developed yet, but actually she loved it when he did so. She loved stroking over his hair and watching the admiring expression in his eyes when he talked to their baby, Felicity admitted to herself when she grabbed the phone and called Oliver once more.

“Felicity, hon,” Oliver said when he took the call. “What can I do for you?”

“Would you mind getting me a chocolate lave cake?”

“As dessert or-“

“If you haven’t gotten anything else yet, the cake was actually enough.”

“Alright,” Oliver replied.

“Thanks,” Felicity replied and hung up. She put her hand back on her bump and whispered, “See? Daddy’s just the best.”

Sometimes Felicity wondered whether Oliver would be just as supportive and understanding if it hadn’t been for the prenatal depression during her pregnancy with Tommy. She knew how much he had hated not being able to help her through it and how he wanted to make sure she was feeling good during this pregnancy. Then she remembered how amazing he basically was to her every single day of their life, whether she was pregnant or not, and laughed about even wasting one second on that thought.

He had been this generous with her even before they had started their own family. Before Emmy had joined their family, Felicity had been the one working a real money-making job like she was now. He knew how much she had stressed herself out sometimes with working long hours and not taking enough breaks because she had wanted to nail the CEO position in the company. So he had come to her during the lunch hours and brought her sandwiches and coffee and-

“Okay, this is getting ridiculous,” Felicity mumbled to herself, glancing at the phone.

She couldn’t desire some other food already. This was crazy! She was pregnant, though. She wasn’t sure if this far into the pregnancy it was still normal to have those cravings, but it didn’t matter. She was pregnant, and she was going to use that excuse for everything she did and felt as long as the pregnancy would last.

The dialing tone only sounded once before Oliver took the call.

“I’m really, really sorry,” Felicity started, “but I’d really like to have a jalapeño-cheese sandwich instead of… well, everything else I ordered in the last half-an-hour.”

Oliver chuckled. “Sandwiches is your last word in this?”

“Yes, absolutely,” Felicity replied. “And I am really sorry. You must hate me with all the changing my mind.”

“Hey, could I ever hate you? Well, of course I could, but not because of that,” Oliver added before Felicity could tell him what a sap he was.

“Get the food here, Oliver, before I starve,” she simply replied and hung up as soon as she heard him chuckle, telling her that he knew exactly that she was just teasing him.

Felicity sat down at the kitchen island with a sigh, taking another sip of her water.

Was it normal to still be this much in love with her husband? She had always thought that most couples fell in love, got married and then settled a routine that they just spend the rest of their life repeating over and over again. Like their life and love got into a rut. Not so for Oliver and her. She still found herself falling in love with him a little more each and every day. How had he said it a few weeks ago? They had hit the jackpot with finding each other. There was no better way to say it.

He was her big jackpot, the one no money and actually nothing else could compete with. With Oliver she felt safe and loved. He was everything she had ever wanted and more. Marrying him – twice to be exact – had been the best decision she had ever made. During both weddings they had barely been able to keep their eyes off each other and even now they often found themselves staring at the other like they couldn’t believe they were at each other’s side.

During their wedding night, the actual wedding night after their first wedding, they had even had some kind of staring contest after they had gotten some energy from a snack early in the morning of the next day. Both of them had been tired out after round after round of sex. They had been lying in bed nakedly, chatting about how they envisioned their life to go from there, with a bucket of chicken wings between them.

She bit down on her bottom lip, glancing at the phone once more. No, she really couldn’t do that, Felicity figured, pushing her hands under her thighs on the bar stool. She really, really couldn’t ask him to get her chicken wings now. She had already changed her mind umpteen times in the last minutes. She shouldn’t do it again. He would think she was crazy.

Felicity shook her head, almost laughing about herself. If all her thoughts and memories of the last minutes had proven anything, then it was that Oliver loved her more than any of her problems with sticking to a decision regarding food could destroy.

She had already reached out her hand for the phone when saw the light from the garage, telling her that Oliver was already back home. Felicity scrunched up her nose. She really, really didn’t want a sandwich right now. She actually felt like she might have to vomit if she just saw one. She wanted chicken wings with sweet-and-sour sauce. She couldn’t ask him to head out once more, though. It was just a stupid midnight craving after all.

When Oliver stepped into the kitchen, a plastic bag dangling from his wrist, he lowered the zipper of his leather jacket and smiled at her. “I think I have something you desire.”

Felicity smiled forcedly. “Yeah… thanks, but I am actually kind of tired now. I think I will go to bed. Sorry for chasing you around like that.”

She quickly pecked his lips and was already about to walk past him when Oliver lifted the plastic bag and asked, “So I guess that is a pass at the chicken wings with a lot of sweet-and-sour sauce?”

Felicity stopped dead in her tracks, slowly turning around to Oliver. He looked at her innocently like he had gotten her exactly what she had told him she wanted instead of what Felicity had just decided she wanted.

“How did you…?” Felicity asked.

Oliver chuckled, pulling Felicity into the kitchen. He put the bucket on the kitchen counter and wrapped his arms around Felicity’s waist, pulling her against him.

“This is our third pregnancy together,” Oliver stated with a smile, “and I have headed out to get you some food for your midnight craving uncountable times. It always starts with you reflecting on our relationship and our family. You think about how everything started with you joining the team and how we and Diggle spent time at Big Belly Burger. That leads you to thinking about how I brought you Chinese food after a particularly tough night down in the lair. Then you think about our first date that unfortunately exploded, hence the lasagna. You realize that I am simply the best husband and how I have always been and how I am taking care of you first with chocolate lava cake when you need comfort and later with sandwich when you had rough days at work at the beginning of our relationship. You get to the conclusion that you absolutely don’t regret marrying me not once but twice actually. Thoughts about getting married lead to thoughts about weddings and finally the wedding night and that means chicken wings. I took a ride through the city for a few minutes, got the chicken wings and waited until you called to tell me you wanted sandwiches. I didn’t want to risk getting home too early, so here I am with what is hopefully the right food.”

Oliver gestured at the bucket on the kitchen counter and smiled at Felicity proudly. She meanwhile stared back at him with blank face.

This man, who had endured years of torture and could easily snap one’s neck, was the same man who headed out at night to satisfy her midnight cravings. While Felicity obviously didn’t know what she really wanted he knew exactly what it was. In moments like this Felicity realized that sometimes Oliver knew her better than she knew herself. It would be scaring her if she didn’t know that it also worked the other way around. Besides, she trusted Oliver that much that even without knowing that sometimes she knew him better than he did himself, she wouldn’t mind.

“You truly are the best,” Felicity whispered, putting her hand to his shoulders.

Smiling, she straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed Oliver gently. He tightened his arms around her waist and pulled her against him more tightly. When his lips opened to her tongue, Felicity moaned into his mouth quietly. Her hands stroked over his chest, gripping the lapels of his leather jacket.

“Oliver?” she asked against his lips, not breaking the kiss.

“Hm?” he asked back and leaned a little forward, bending Felicity’s head back. He stroked his tongue into her mouth for a moment. “Give me one more moment and you can enjoy the chicken wings, just one more moment just kissing you.”

“I don’t want the chicken wings anymore,” Felicity replied.

Oliver chuckled against her lips. “The window for chicken wings is already closed?”

“Hmhmm,” Felicity hummed in agreement.

Chuckling some more, Oliver pulled back a little. He nuzzled Felicity’s nose with his and asked, “What can I get you instead?”

“Oh, you don’t need to get me anything.”

“Felicity, I don’t mind heading out once more and-“

“No, it’s a really different kind of craving,” Felicity explained. She turned them, so she was with her back to the kitchen counter. She quickly put her hands to the countertop and lifted herself to sit on it. She tugged at the lapels of his leather jacket until Oliver stood right between her thighs. “And I have everything here that I need to satisfy it.”

Oliver smirked. “Well, take whatever you need, Mrs. Queen.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, moving her right hand into Oliver’s short hair. Straightening up on the counter, she pressed her lips to his and locked her legs around his hips.

For this craving there was no changing her mind about what exact flavor she wanted. There was only Oliver, no need to consider any other option.


	167. A kiss to take with me

She woke to the tickly scratching of his stubble against her cheek. His soft lips moved from the edge of her jaw over the side of her face to her ear. They grazed against her earlobe for a short moment before they pressed against her temple.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he whispered into her ear.

Smiling, Felicity released a low groan and turned her face into the pillow. She loved waking up like this and lately she had woken up like this every single day. During the weekdays, when she had to get up early for work, Oliver would even set his timer early, so he could be the one waking her. He loved that.

Felicity turned her face back, resting her cheek on the pillow. She sighed tiredly. Still not opening her eyes, she whispered, “Morning.”

Oliver nuzzled her cheekbone and gently kissed her jaw, making Felicity hum contently. She felt Oliver’s right hand moving into her hair, playing with some strands, before his fingertips moved over her scalp, massaging it.

“I thought you wanted to take the kids to the grocery,” Felicity whispered, “not that I am complaining about being woken up like this.”

“The kids are downstairs, getting ready for the shopping tour,” Oliver explained, stroking his hand over her hair gently. “I thought you’d like to use the time to enjoy breakfast in bed.”

His lips brushed against the corner of her mouth before he pulled back from her. Sighing once more, Felicity opened her eyes and rolled onto her back. Oliver was sitting on the edge of the mattress, a tray with delicious looking breakfast on his thighs. As soon as she sat up, he put it to her thighs.

“Thank you,” Felicity said, leaning back against the headboard of the bed with a sigh. “I hope you do know that there is no reason for me to have breakfast in bed every weekend, though.”

Oliver chuckled, taking her glasses from the nightstand and putting them onto her nose. “Maybe there is no reason, but you have to admit that you like it.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t fight you on that,” Felicity replied.

She took a sip of the orange juice, watching Oliver over the edge of the glass. He looked at her with the same expression of love and admiration that was always in his eyes when his gaze was directed at her. The intensity seemed to only increase when she was pregnant.

“It’s not supposed to rain today,” Felicity broke the comfortable silence, “so I figured we could take the kids and go to the park or something. You know, just spend a day having fun outside.”

Oliver smiled. “I would love that.”

“Great,” Felicity replied, smiling back at him. “So you hurry with the shopping and I will scarf down my food and get ready, so we can leave once the groceries are put away.”

“Sounds like a good plan. You don’t have to hurry, though, shopping with the kids always takes a lot of time, so-“

“Oh, you can leave them here if you want.”

“No, I promised to take them with me. Emmy is already excited.”

Felicity grinned. “Make sure she doesn’t abduct a baby like she did when she was impatiently waiting for Tommy to be born.”

“God, please don’t remind me,” Oliver replied with a groan, making a face. When Felicity chuckled, he leaned in and gently brushed his lips against hers. “I’ll go downstairs before the kids get upstairs to get me. I told them you were still asleep, and I was just going to put the tray in front of the door, so you wouldn’t have to go downstairs when you’re hungry.”

Felicity chuckled once more, patting Oliver’s thigh playfully. “You still aren’t over the fact that I get all of the kids’ attention now, right?”

“The baby is getting the attention,” Oliver replied. “It has nothing to do with you.”

“Na, you’re just jealous, but that’s okay,” Felicity relied with a teasing smile. “Go get down and get their attention as long as they haven’t seen me yet.”

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her once more. Felicity was already about to pull away, thinking it was meant to be just a short peck to her lips, but Oliver put his hand to the back of her neck and kept her against him. His lips opened, his tongue moving out and begging entrance to her mouth. Moaning quietly, Felicity granted him the entrance he was begging for. Her hands framed his face, gently stroking his stubble, while he deepened the kiss by massaging her tongue with his. Felicity only pulled away when the need for air was setting her lungs on fire.

“Wow,” she said breathlessly, chuckling. “That was quite intense given that you’re only going shopping and not going to war.”

Oliver smiled, biting the inside of his cheek and shrugging his shoulders. “I felt like it.”

“Well, it was very nice,” Felicity replied, “but now go.”

Chuckling, Oliver did as she had suggested. He went to the door, winking back at her over his shoulder. Felicity shook her head, resting it against the headboard of the bed. She needed to take another few deep breaths before her heartbeat finally slowed down a little.

Smiling, she started eating her breakfast, beginning with the scrambled eggs. Oliver had made her breakfast each day of the past weekends. He was always telling her that he just wanted to spoil her, but she was actually sure that he just wanted her away from the kids a little longer to have their attention. With her being pregnant the kids’, and especially Emmy’s attention, was all on her.

She knew that he loved that she was pregnant. He was all attentive and sweet around her, even more than he usually was already. He also loved that the kids were looking forward to their baby brother or baby sister, but he didn’t exactly appreciate being sidelined when the kids were all busy with cuddling mommy and the baby.

Poor big baby that he was, Felicity thought with a smile. How could someone not love that about him? Like he was-

“Hey, forgot something?” Felicity asked, cocking her head, when Oliver stepped back into the room.

“Not exactly,” Oliver replied.

He quickly stepped to the bed and leaned down to kiss her lips. The kiss was just as passionate as the one before. His tongue explored her mouth, stroking against hers. His teeth meanwhile nibbled at her bottom lip gently. When their lips parted, Felicity licked her lips to savor the last of his taste on them. Only then did she slowly open her eyes to find him looking at her.

“It has been so long since I kissed you the last time already.”

“It’s been five minutes maybe.”

“Well, that feels like a lot to me,” Oliver replied sheepishly.

Felicity chuckled, taking his hand from under her chin and kissing the palm. Gesturing to the breast pocket of his leather jacket, she asked, “What happened to the kiss you saved for bad times?”

Last week, when she had woken him in the middle of the night to get her some food, she had blown him a kiss, and he had put it into the pocket of his jacket for bad times.

“Yeah, I needed that one yesterday,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “The kids were napping, and I tried to call you, but you were in a meeting. I saw dark times ahead of me.”

Felicity chuckled, playfully boxing Oliver into the side. “You, Oliver Queen, are a giant sap.”

“I am your giant sap.”

“You are only making it worse,” Felicity replied, shaking her head.

“Okay, I’ll go then. Just one more kiss,” Oliver answered and kissed her once more. “Okay another one… and another one and…”

Felicity chuckled against his lips. This sap!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to apologize. I promised you so many updates during my two weeks off. I wanted to flood you with updates here and one-shots for prompts. Unfortunately I had to write a 100 pages transcript for work that took all of my time lately, so there wasn’t as much time to write as I had hoped for. Sorry for that. Maybe I am lucky and the second week will allow me to spend a little more time writing fanfics instead of transcripts.


	168. Guilty conscience

“Are you sure you want to go there alone?” Oliver asked, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I don’t mind coming with you and backing you up. I could play with the kids and just join you when you need help.”

Felicity chuckled. “Oliver, I am talking to Lyla. I am not facing off against a villain.”

“Yes, but I know how nervous you are about talking to her,” Oliver replied, putting an arm around Felicity’s waist and pulling her against him. “If you need me, I’ll come with you.”

“No, I think I’d rather do this alone,” Felicity explained.

“You are not alone.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over his chest. “I know, but I should do this alone nonetheless. Besides, you should really work on cleaning out the playroom. It’s only eighteen more weeks until our baby is going to be born, and I don’t want to start planning and setting up the nursery on last minute. It’s time we make some progress on that.”

“I can still work on that some other day. I think it’s more important to be at your side if you need me.”

They looked at each other for a long moment, neither of them saying a word. When Felicity took in a deep breath, sadness appearing in her eyes, Oliver put his right hand to her cheek and gently kissed her forehead.

“Oliver, what were we thinking?” Felicity asked, resting her head against his shoulder and circling his waist with her arms firmly. “Lyla was the one person to really help me with my depression, and now we are rubbing under her nose that-“

“I doubt that Lyla will see it that way,” Oliver replied quietly and kissed Felicity’s temple. “She’s our friend.”

“Oh, yeah! And we are such great friends to her,” Felicity responded, the sarcasm strong in her voice. She bent her head back to look at Oliver, shaking her head. “We’ve been terribly selfish about this.”

Oliver sighed quietly, stroking his hand over Felicity’s bump. “Well, we were only focused on what we wanted.”

“Exactly,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head. “And that made us selfish.”

Oliver pressed his lips together, obviously keeping himself from disagreeing with her. Felicity smiled halfheartedly at him, stroking her hand over his shoulder and bicep with a sigh. She knew that even if he felt the same way she did, he would never admit it. He wanted to keep every feeling of guilt away from her since it had been what had dominated her actions during the pregnancy depression.

Felicity wasn’t depressive, though. She was just feeling guilty about something she felt she had a right and maybe even an obligation to feel guilty about. At Tommy’s birthday party John had told Oliver that he and Lyla were working for another baby. Oliver had told Felicity, and together they had decided that maybe it was time for them to do the same. Well, there might have been a little misunderstanding at first, but at the end it had led them to where they were. Felicity was 22 weeks along in her third pregnancy, while John and Lyla had apparently given up after the last months of trying for a baby had left them exhausted and without the result they had hoped for.

Felicity had been so deep in her baby-bubble with everything going smoothly in the pregnancy that she hadn’t even thought about Lyla and John that much anymore. Of course she had wondered about her friends’ baby plan from time to time, but she hadn’t really realized how much time they must have already spend trying until last night. John had told Oliver in the lair that he and Lyla had given up on trying because after so many negative test results they felt like it was time to give up before they would lose themselves and each other in the wish for a baby.

Ever since Oliver had told her about that last night, Felicity felt terribly guilty. She and Oliver had just decided to have another baby and happily celebrated the fact that they had gotten pregnant immediately. Because of that they had been blind for their friends’ problems, blind and disrespectful.

“Mommy, when are we going?” Emmy asked from the inside of the car.

Felicity glanced at the kids in their car seats shortly before she turned back around to Oliver. “Emmy’s right. We gotta go.”

Oliver circled her waist and pulled her close against him, kissing the side of her neck. His hands rubbed over her back comfortingly. He pressed his lips to his pulse point, his tongue flicking over it shortly, before he asked, “Are you sure I shouldn’t come with you?”

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied.

She pressed her nose to his shoulder and breathed him in. The scent of his skin was just as comforting as it always was. When she pulled out of the hug, she stroked her fingertips over his short stubble and leaned in to kiss him. She felt the baby kicking in response to the little butterflies Felicity felt in her tummy. When the kiss broke, Oliver gently stroked her cheek with the knuckles of his hand. Then he opened the door of the car for her and closed it once she had gotten in. He leaned into the car through the open window and kissed her once more.

“Everything will be alright,” he promised her.

Felicity smiled sadly. “I hope so.”

Oliver squeezed her shoulder once before he leaned back. Felicity shut the window and directed the car towards the street. She waved her hand at Oliver once more before she drove away, seeing Oliver standing in front of their home with his hands pushed into the pockets of his pants and watching them drive away.

On the way to the playground she listened to Emmy singing the song in the radio with her own creative lyrics and Tommy trying to join into his sister’s singing. She watched the two in the rearview mirror, smiling at how Emmy tried to dance in her seat.

“Look, there are Sara and Aunt Lyla,” Felicity interrupted her kids’ version of whatever song was playing on the radio and pointed at where Lyla and Sara were standing next to their car. When Emmy’s hand immediately moved to unbuckle her seat belt, Felicity told her, “Hey, no unbuckling until the car is standing.”

Emmy mumbled something to herself, but when Felicity perked up her eyebrow at her in the rearview mirror, the young girl quickly put on an innocent smile. As soon as the car stood still, Felicity heard the clicking of the seat belt followed by the door handle.

“Wait, I need to unlock the door first,” Felicity told her daughter, rolling her eyes. Emmy knew that they had the child safety lock, yet she refused to wait until someone had unlocked the door before she tried to open it. “Be careful when you get out, okay? There are cars out there, Emmy.”

“I’ll be careful. I promise,” Emmy replied with a smile.

Felicity unlocked the door and immediately Emmy jumped out and ran towards Sara and Lyla. Felicity shook her head at her daughter’s behavior. Sometimes Emmy acted like they never let her leave the house. Felicity pulled the bag she had packed for this afternoon from the passenger seat and got out of the car. Lyla had opened the door to the backseat already. She unbuckled Tommy’s belt and lifted him out of his seat and into her arms.

“Hi, buddy,” she said and kissed Tommy’s rosy cheek. “It’s been awhile since you saw your godmother the last time, hm?”

“Lyla!” Tommy called out with a sigh.

“Hey, at least you still recognize me, right?”

“Yupp,” Tommy replied, smiling at his godmother.

Felicity watched the two of them, feeling her guilty conscience only getting worse at the way Lyla looked at Tommy. Her eyes beamed with joy at the sight of the little boy in her arms.

“Hi,” Felicity said quietly.

“Hey,” Lyla replied, quickly adjusting Tommy’s position on her hip, so she had one arm free to hug Felicity. “You okay?”

“Yeah, sure,” Felicity replied quickly, but if the way Lyla looked at her when they pulled out of the hug, she didn’t believe her. She quickly looked towards the playground where Emmy and Sara were already playing. “Nobody else here today?”

“No, it looks like we have the place all to ourselves,” Lyla replied. “I suggest we sit down at the table, so we can watch the kids and talk, right?”

“Sounds good,” Felicity replied with a hesitant smile.

“I’ll take Tommy to the girls,” Lyla explained. “Just make yourself comfortable already as far as that is possible. Oh, I have sat cushions of our garden chairs in the trunk. I borrowed them to my mom for a party and didn’t get to them back yet. You can have one if it’s more comfortable then.”

“Oh, I think it will be okay without cushions, thanks,” Felicity replied.

She quickly turned around and walked over to the picnic table. She put the bag to the ground and sat down on the table, resting her feet on the bench. That way she had a slightly better view over the playground.

Emmy and Sara were playing in the sand with some toys Lyla had probably brought with her. Sara tried to help Tommy fill the bucket in front of him with sand, but he slapped her hands away since he obviously wanted to fill it himself. Felicity overheard Lyla telling Sara to let him do it on his own if he didn’t want help before she told Tommy that he couldn’t hit Sara. Tommy answered something that Felicity didn’t understand, but she guessed it was an apology since Sara patted the boy’s head with a smile.

When Lyla approached her, Felicity turned her eyes away from the children. She took in a deep breath, trying to think about how she could best start with what she wanted to tell her friend. As soon as Lyla had sat down next to her, she gripped Felicity’s hands, though.

“How are you feeling?” she asked gently.

“Terrible,” Felicity admitted.

Lyla squeezed Felicity’s fingers, looking at her with a comforting smile. “I assumed so. From the way you sounded on the phone I had a feeling about that. Did you talk to Oliver about it?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, of course. He thinks I shouldn’t worry that much, but that is easier said than done.”

Lyla nodded. “Well, it’s a good thing you were able to tell him about the depression and to come to me about it immediately this time around, so-“

“Wait, what?” Felicity interrupted her friend with a frown.

“Last time you couldn’t tell anyone about it until you broke,” Lyla explained, squeezing Felicity’s fingers once more. “It’s a good thing that you can lean on us now and-“

“I am not suffering from depression currently,” Felicity explained.

“Oh?” Lyla made, making a surprised face. “I thought-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted her, shaking her head. “I’m healthy, no depression so far. I had a few low days, but nothing serious. It was normal bad mood I guess. Anyway, it was nothing to actually worry about.”

“Oh, okay,” Lyla said with a smile, still sounding surprised. “That’s good, very good even. But then why are you feeling terrible?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, lowering her gaze for a moment. Once again Lyla had proven to be a really good friend, immediately worrying about Felicity’s wellbeing.

“I… uhm… I…”

Lyla frowned. “Everything okay with the baby?”

“Yes, it’s…” Felicity took in a deep breath, looking at her worried friend. “I wanted to apologize.”

Lyla’s frown deepened. “For what?”

“When John told Oliver that the two of you were trying for a baby, we just decided to do the same. Then we were so wrapped up into our own stuff that we didn’t even realize that you were having trouble and… I am really sorry, Lyla. You’ve been there for me during my crisis when I was pregnant with Tommy, and instead of being here for you now, I am rubbing right under your nose that…” Felicity gestured towards the baby bump under her white shirt, shaking her head. “I am so sorry.”

Lyla took in a deep breath, lowering her gaze for a moment. Felicity squeezed her friend’s fingers like Lyla had squeezed hers before. When Lyla looked back up, she smiled at Felicity sadly, but she put her other hand on top of Felicity’s, holding it in both of hers, nonetheless.

“Felicity, we’re friends,” Lyla replied, “and I am happy for Oliver and you. You wanted another baby and now you will have one. That is fine and nothing I would ever even consider being mad at you for.”

Felicity couldn’t find any sign that what Lyla said wasn’t what she meant, so Felicity smiled gratefully.

“Thanks,” she whispered. “And if you want to talk about what is going on in your life, I am always here for you.”

Lyla shrugged her shoulders, sighing. “There isn’t much to talk about actually. We tried, but it just didn’t work the way we wanted it to. We feel like it’s more healthy for the two of us to give this up, at least for now. Maybe one day we will get lucky, but for now that wish is canceled.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “Did you talk to your doctor?”

“She said there is no physical reason it would explain it. I am still fertile. She did mention that maybe my age is partly responsible nonetheless, though.”

Felicity released a low growl. “That’s not something any woman wants to hear.”

Lyla chuckled. “Yeah, I was almost going to throw my purse at her, but Johnny stopped me.”

“And now?”

Lyla shrugged her shoulders. “Well, we gave up. Apparently we are not supposed to have a second child, and maybe it’s better that way. Johnny and I both have dangerous jobs, and we really aren’t the youngest anymore. Maybe it’s just not supposed to be.”

“It’s weird,” Felicity whispered, and Lyla perked up her eyebrows in response. “You know, you and John have always been the role model of a family for Oliver and me.”

Lya chuckled, gently slapping Felicity’s shoulder. “Oh, come on!”

“No, it’s true,” Felicity replied firmly, making Lyla’s laughter fall silent. “The reason it took so long for Oliver and me to get together was that Oliver didn’t think he could have it both ways. He didn’t think he could have a family and still be the Arrow. Then you and John had Baby Sara, and he started questioning that. Well, it took a little longer and some persuasion until he finally gave in, but…”

Felicity gestured to the kids playing in the sand and then to her bump, making Lyla chuckle. It had been a long way until she and Oliver had gotten to where they were now.

“We would have never made it to this point if it hadn’t been for the two of you,” Felicity continued with a smile. “You started a family despite the dangers of both of your lives, and that is how we saw that it is possible. I think ultimately that has been the main reason why Oliver ever gave in and decided that he could have a family with kids too.”

Lyla smiled. “It’s a nice thought to think that we might have been a little inspiration for you on that.”

“More than a little,” Felicity promised. “And it is highly unfair that you don’t get your family to expand the way you want it.”

Lyla sighed quietly, putting her elbows to her knees and looking at the kids. Felicity followed her gaze. The three of them were playing together peacefully. Tommy was shoveling sand into the bucket, and when he made a tumbling step back that made him fall down on the ground, Sara quickly put her arms around him from behind and helped him back to his feet. She would make a great big sister as she had already proven to be for Felicity’s children.

“We have Sara, and that is all that matters,” Lyla said. “Another baby would have been nice, but if it’s not supposed to be, then that’s okay too. We have great godchildren to borrow.”

“And you can borrow this sweetheart here too,” Felicity replied, stroking her hand over her bump. “And you are absolutely right. Baby Sara is a blessing. She taught Emmy how to be a good sister.”

Lyla smiled, nodding her head. Everything was quiet for a moment while the two women were just looking at their children, watching them play together.

“You know it’s weird that you still call her Baby Sara. She’s seven by now.”

“I don’t care. For me she will always stay Baby Sara.”

They shot each other a short glance and both of them chuckled in amusement.


	169. Some memories better stay dead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a smut piece with mentions of torture.

“Oliver?” Felicity called. She kicked the door shut behind her and dropped her keys into the small bowl on the table next to the door. “Honey, I’m home.”

“I’m upstairs,” Oliver’s answer came immediately, “already waiting for you in the bedroom.”

Felicity licked her lips, feeling her mouth watering at the thought. She carelessly dropped her purse to the foot of the stairs and slipped out of her high heels. She sighed at the feeling of the cold wood against her slightly aching balls of the feet. Oliver had told her several times now that maybe it was time to give up on wearing high heels for the remaining 17 weeks of the pregnancy, but Felicity didn’t want to give in already. She would get through a few more weeks wearing them. She rather endured hurting feet than feeling like a dwarf with everyone else around her being so much taller than her.

When she stepped into the doorframe of the bedroom, she leaned against it and crossed her arms in front of her chest, watching Oliver. He was lying on his side of the bed, wearing nothing but his long sweatpants. His eyes were focused on the little book in his hands and the words he was writing into it, but Felicity knew that he knew exactly that she was standing there and watching him.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked. “Adding a few more fantasies to your sex wish list?”

Oliver closed the book and put it in the first drawer of his nightstand. When he turned back around to her, he rolled onto his side and propped his head up onto his hand. He licked his lips, eyeing her body up.

“You know that I don’t write down those wishes,” Oliver told her. “They are all in my head.”

“Well, I think we both know that there will be one more of those fantasies that won’t only be only in your head anymore.”

Oliver released a low groan, nodding his head. “Yes, we do.”

“I’m gonna freshening up. You, my dear, should strip in the meantime and then wait for me with your eyes closed,” Felicity told him. “If you open them before I allow you to-“

“You will punish me?” Oliver asked, wiggling with his eyebrows.

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him. “Be careful, Mister. I doubt you’d enjoy the punishments I could come up with.”

“I love when you’re all bossy.”

Oliver’s eyes glinted, and Felicity actually had to rub her thighs together. Oliver’s gaze on her skin alone was enough to set her skin on fire and make her feel aroused. After years of marriage she should be used to being looked at like that, but hormones were unpredictable, little beasts.

Felicity cleared her throat, getting serious. “I think we should decide on a codeword for this.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow. “A codeword?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “I know you said you feel safe about this, but I want a codeword. I’d feel safer if we had one.”

“How about we make it easy, and we just say ‘stop’ when we need it?” Oliver suggested and Felicity nodded slowly, making him chuckle. “Hon, relax please. Everything is alright.”

“Just… promise me you will tell me if it gets too much.”

“I will,” Oliver swore, smiling at her. “Think about the time you blindfolded me. You were worried about that too, but it played out so nicely.”

Felicity gulped, remembering how she had ridden his face and how it had taken the whole thing of receiving oral to a new level. She had been unsure if blindfolding him had been a good idea because giving up control like that was not easy for Oliver. He had insisted on playing that fantasy out, though, and they hadn’t regretted it. Yet Felicity was hesitant about leveling up on Oliver giving up control like that.

“Felicity,” Oliver said intently, making her look at him, so he could wordlessly reassure her.

“You’ll tell me to stop when it gets too much.”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, absolutely.”

Felicity took in another deep breath, nodding. “Good. I go to the bathroom. You strip.”

“I’ll do everything you tell me to do,” Oliver replied with a smile while Felicity went to the bathroom en suite.

“Don’t forget to keep your eyes closed once you stripped,” Felicity told him, smiling seductively at him before she closed the door between them.

As soon as she was alone in the bathroom, she slipped out of her clothes, tied up her hair and took a quick shower. She put on the dark green lingerie she had bought for this evening a few days ago and let her hair back down, quickly combing it with her fingers. Stepping closer in front of the mirror, she eyed up her make-up and decided that a quick touch-up would be enough.

Felicity was still surprised by the fantasy Oliver had chosen they should play out. They had decided awhile ago that, though the five envelopes she had handed him for his birthday to play out fantasies had been used up, they could still have fun with the fun with playing out Oliver’s fantasies. He had told her to make her own list, so they could work on that too, but for now Felicity preferred letting herself be surprised by what Oliver wanted.

Well, she definitely was surprised by the one he had picked, Felicity thought when she took the ties she had stolen from Oliver’s wardrobe into her hands. Sometimes she missed seeing them on him, but at least she could see them again in a different way now. The ties had a key role for the wish tonight because Oliver wanted to be tied to the bed at his wrists and ankles.

Felicity moved her hands over the soft fabric of the ties and sighed quietly. She had asked Oliver again and again if he was sure about the wish, and he had always said he was. It wasn’t that Felicity doubted him, but for someone with Oliver’s history of torture, she was just insecure about it. She-

“Hon?” she heard Oliver’s voice from the bedroom. “Did you fall asleep in the bathtub again?”

Felicity chuckled. “Don’t get cheeky, Mister. Keep your eyes closed. I will be back in a few seconds.”

She heard Oliver sighing dramatically, and Felicity chuckled to herself. With a last glance in the mirror she decided that she shouldn’t let Oliver wait any longer. She tiptoed towards the door.

“Are your eyes closed?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied immediately.

“Good. I am going to come out now. Remember to keep your eyes closed until I allow you to open them.”

“I wouldn’t dare to reject your command.”

Felicity bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from chuckling. Oliver loved pretending like he was doing whatever she told him all the time. They both knew that he could be just as stubborn as she was, though. Luckily, Felicity should add. When she opened the door, she only snuck a peek outside, making sure Oliver was really lying on the bed naked with his eyes closed. Only when she was convinced of that, she stepped out of the bathroom and approached the bed. She climbed onto the mattress on her side of the bed.

“Come closer to the middle,” Felicity told him, and Oliver did, an eager smile on his lips that made Felicity chuckle. “You are so desperate.”

“I’d call it excited,” Oliver replied, making Felicity roll her eyes. “And there is no reason to roll your eyes at that.”

Felicity cocked her head, perking up an eyebrow. “Are you-“

“-absolutely in love with you and know you in my bones? Yes absolutely.”

Again Felicity rolled her eyes, shaking her head. “Lift your hands over your head.”

Oliver did so immediately and Felicity used the first tie to tie down his wrists to the headboard of the bed.

“You seem to have experience in this,” Oliver said quietly.

Felicity chuckled. “Regretting it already?”

“No,” Oliver replied quickly. “I am just wondering where you learned it.”

“I did some research,” Felicity replied, finishing the knot around his wrists. She leaned down and brushed her lips against Oliver’s for a short moment. “Don’t worry. You’re the first I tie to the bed for that reason.”

“Glad to hear that,” Oliver answered while Felicity was crawling to the foot of the bed to tie down Oliver’s right ankle. “Wait. What other reasons are there to tie someone to the bed?”

Felicity chuckled, fastening the tie around his right ankle and moving over to the left. “You will never know.”

Once the tie was safely wrapped around his ankle, keeping him to the bed, Felicity took a step back, watching her masterpiece with a satisfied smile on her lips. When she stepped back to the bed, she quickly checked if the ties at his ankles were really secure.

“They aren’t too tight, right?” she asked, but Oliver shook his head, making her smile. “Good.”

Slowly Felicity walked around the bed, crawled onto the mattress and right towards Oliver. He was already semi-erect. The process of being tied to the bed while he was naked seemed to have already had its effect. Felicity didn’t waste any time. She moved her right leg over Oliver’s hip and straddled him. His erection pressed perfectly against her lace-covered core, making both of them groan. Oliver pulled at the ties around his wrists to put his hands to her hips and make her move. He released a dark growl when his hands wouldn’t move.

“I am going to regret this, right?” he asked.

Felicity chuckled, leaning down and pressing her chest to Oliver’s as much as her bump allowed her to. “With the words of Ronald Weasley, you’re gonna suffer, but you’re gonna be happy about it.”

Chuckling quietly, Oliver answered, “Well, I hope you keep your promises, Mrs. Queen.”

“Oh, you can bet on that,” Felicity replied. She pressed a kiss to the underside of Oliver’s jaw before she straightened back up again and moved her hips, so Oliver’s cock pressed firmer against her folds. “You can open your eyes by the way.”

Oliver did so immediately, and Felicity felt a tingling in her stomach at the hungry expression in his eyes. His gaze drifted from her face down her body to the dark green bra and further down to the dark green panties. Felicity didn’t even doubt for a second that he knew why she had chosen the color. She knew how much he loved seeing that color on her, especially when it was dark green lingerie she wore. His color on her body always turned him on. If the way his cock hardened against her folds was any indication, it still didn’t fail its effect after all the years.

“A new set,” Oliver noted, looking back at her face. “I like it.”

Felicity smiled. Of course he knew that the set was new. Oliver knew each piece of clothing in her wardrobe, especially the lingerie.

Licking her lips, Felicity pressed down on Oliver’s cock more firmly. The lacy fabric of her panties pushed to the side, allowing Felicity’s wet folds to make contact with Oliver’s hard, hot erection. They both groaned at the contact.

“And here I thought you’d use the opportunity of my hands being out of the way to tease me to death,” Oliver told her between gritted teeth, moving his hips as much as possible to answer his movements on top of him.

Felicity leaned forward a little, pressing her clit to his hot skin and slowly moving upwards until the tip of his cock pressed against her core. She hummed, closing her eyes and enjoying the contact. Using Oliver like this and making his cock slide between her folds without ever entering her was one of her favorite things to do in bed or wherever else for that matter. Especially in the last weeks she had felt the need for more sex, craving orgasms more often than usually, and Oliver easily complied.

“Just getting rid of the first horniness to take my time teasing you,” Felicity replied.

She put her hands to Oliver’s chest while she was continuing to move against him, increasing her pleasure by using him. When her eyes locked with Oliver’s, she saw how much he enjoyed this, enjoyed watching her move on top of him. His hands and legs were struggling slightly, halfheartedly trying to get out of the ties. She knew he wanted to touch her. He always enjoyed doing so. His heartbeat was quick. Felicity could feel it under the palm of her hands. His lips were slightly opened. He panted quietly, his chest rising and falling quickly.

Slowly Felicity moved her hands up his chest to his shoulders, scratching her nails over his scarred skin. She lowered her forearms to the side of his chest and pressed her body against his. Her nipples hardened even more and she had to pull back a little to keep them from hurting. They were sore lately because of the pregnancy. Her head was hovering right over Oliver’s, their noses almost brushing against each other’s when Felicity thrust down on him. She could feel his hot breath on the skin of her face and when he licked his lips, it almost touched hers. Oliver lifted his head from the pillow, trying to kiss her, but Felicity leaned back, keeping just out of his reach.

“Oh, now you want to play?” Oliver asked, dropping his head back.

Felicity licked her lips slowly, making Oliver groan. “Well, this was your idea and- Oh my god.”

Oliver’s thrust upward made the head of his cock bump against her clit in just the right way. She felt her body starting to shake when her orgasm came closer. Her head dropped forward and Oliver captured her lips with his, swallowing her moans and whimpers. His tongue opened her lips to him, exploring her mouth. Felicity moaned into the kiss while her movements grew erratic. Her stomach tightened, heat boiling right under her skin in all of her body. All Oliver had to do was to thrust up as much as possible once more for her to fall apart on top of him.

While the pleasure rushed through her veins, Felicity moved her right hand into Oliver’s hair and pulled his head back a little, so she could deepen the kiss. Her hips were meanwhile slowly riding out the last waves of the delicious climax.

With a sigh of exhaustion, she let herself fall onto the mattress next to Oliver, resting her head on his shoulder.

“That was great,” she said with another sigh. “I could actually sleep for an hour now.”

“You wouldn’t dare to,” Oliver replied between gritted teeth.

Felicity chuckled, moving her forefinger up and down his stomach. “Oh, poor baby. Don’t get grumpy.”

“Hey, I want to see your reaction if I come all over you and leave you unfinished.”

Smiling seductively, Felicity turned onto her stomach as much as the bump allowed it, pressing her body to Oliver’s side. Her forefinger moved down his chest to his lower stomach and over the thin line of hair that led further down to his cock. She brushed the tip of her finger against his erection, following the thick vein there while watching Oliver’s face. He gritted his teeth, staring at the ceiling intently.  He was painfully hard. Felicity could feel it even with just that one fingertip that touched his erection. She kept the touch lightly, always pulling her hand further away when Oliver tried to move his hips upward to get more friction. Felicity wouldn’t let him, though.

“You were the one who wanted to be tied to the bed, hon,” Felicity reminded him, moving her finger further down and circling the head of his cock.  “I asked you several times if you are sure that you want that. It’s your own fault if you trust me this much.”

Oliver glared at her, making Felicity bite her tongue. They both knew that Felicity’s concerns had been about torture and not about teasing, but it was a fact that she had actually tried to make him take the wish back. Now he would have to live through it until Felicity was finished with him. The good thing with his hands tied away was that they couldn’t distract her. She could basically keep going on with teasing him like forever.

Smirking, she sat up and crawled between Oliver’s spread legs. She sat back on her heels, locking eyes with her husband. He took in a deep breath, probably seeing the slightly mischievous expression in her eyes. Not breaking the eye contact she put her hands to his knees and bent forward, so her head hovered right over Oliver’s cock.

“God, please,” Oliver groaned when Felicity blew a breath over him. Oliver squirmed slightly in a try to get his erection in contact with her lips, but Felicity was right out of reach for him. “Felicity, please.”

“Nope, not yet,” Felicity replied.

She stuck out her tongue, moving the tip of it along the vein of his cock where her fingertip had gently stroked him before. She knew it wasn’t nearly enough touch for Oliver. He was groaning, trying to press himself closer to her. Felicity didn’t allow it, though. She kept the touch of her tongue light, never stopping her path up his body. She licked a straight line up to his belly button, swirled her tongue into it and continued the path upwards.

“Felicity,” Oliver groaned impatiently when her lips had reached his collarbone.

“Patience, hon,” Felicity almost chuckled against his skin.

“You try being patient when- God.”

The long moan that escaped Oliver’s lips when she cupped his balls, still keeping the touch light, sent a jolt of pleasure right through Felicity’s core. She licked her lips and pushed her nose against his neck, breathing him in. She moved her hand from Oliver’s balls over the length of his cock and back down again. She stroked him with firm movements, working him back up until he was panting and his breathing was growing erratic.

“God,” he moaned, arching his back and thrusting into her hand as much as the ties around his wrists and ankles allowed him. “Yes, yes, yes- No!”

Felicity chuckled, dropping her head to his shoulder. The hand that had stroked the base of his cock before was now moving over his stomach lazily. Her fingers avoided his scars, knowing exactly that they were erotic zones for him. She could still feel Oliver’s strong heartbeat against her fingers, but it had slowed down compared to before when she had worked him up.

“Felicity,” Oliver said with a groan.

She rested her chin on his shoulder, looking at his face with an innocent smile. “I don’t understand why you are complaining.”

Oliver glared at her and Felicity chuckled. The laughter got stuck in her throat and turned into a long moan when Oliver licked his lips, though. His eyes were still locked on hers, telling her that he wasn’t just wetting his lips. He knew exactly what this did to her.

Under Oliver’s intense gaze Felicity Felicity crawled off the bed and slowly unclasped her bra. She let the lacy fabric fall to the floor, and without taking her eyes off Oliver she let her panties follow. She gave Oliver a few seconds to just look at her. She felt goosebumps eliciting on her skin in response. The flutter in her stomach was accompanied by the baby’s light kicking against her inside.

Slowly Felicity crawled back onto the bed and towards Oliver. She sat down on his lower stomach, just far enough away, so her center didn’t get in contact with his cock. As much control as she had due to the fact that Oliver didn’t touch her, as little she had with his eyes still on her and her eyes seeing all of his perfectly defined muscles.

Felicity moved her fingers over Oliver’s chest, once again exploring the muscles and scars she had already memorized. Her nails scratched over his skin lightly, while her hips moved on his lower stomach, rubbing against him. Oliver groaned, trying to thrust up, but Felicity kept him down to the mattress firmly.

Chuckling slightly, Felicity leaned down and took the path her hands had taken before with her lips and tongue. She kissed, licked and nibbled her way all over his scarred skin. When she reached the underside of Oliver’s jaw, his stubble tickling the sensitive skin around her mouth, Oliver was panting.

“God, Felicity, please,” he pleaded with her. “Just give me something.”

Felicity pressed her lips to Oliver’s, but she pulled back before he could deepen the kiss.

“You just wanted something, Oliver,” Felicity told him when he looked at her with narrowed eyes. “I felt a quick peck to your lips would be just the right thing.”

“I hate you a little, you know that.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “That doesn’t matter because I know that you love me very much.”

Oliver smiled at her. “Yes, I do.”

Felicity’s smile matched his when she leaned down and kissed him. It was a long, passionate kiss. Their tongues danced with each other. Neither of them desired to take control over the kiss. They just poured their love for each other into it, enjoying the moment and forgetting all about their little game of teasing.

Slowly Felicity moved her hand down over his chest and hips between their bodies. She took hold of his cock and lowered herself onto him. They both responded to finally being connected like that with a long moan. Their lips brushed against each other’s once more while they were both adjusting to the feeling.

When Felicity sat up, she put her hands to Oliver’s chest and started rocking her hips against him. She started slowly, never moving too far away from him. The underside of the baby bump pressed against Oliver’s lower stomach. His eyes drifted down to where their baby was growing, telling her that he could feel the baby’s firm kicks. When his eyes locked back on hers, they both started panting at the intensity of the moment.

Quickly Felicity’s movements picked up pace. The slapping of skin against skin was to be heard while Felicity quickly took them higher and higher in their pleasure.

“Oliver.”

“Yes,” Oliver replied, knowing exactly what she wanted to tell him.

Felicity leaned down a little, so their lips were hovering right over each other’s without touching. Their eyes were still on each other intensely when they fell off the edge together. The pleasure rushed through Felicity, making her body spasm involuntarily. Her inner walls clenched around Oliver’s jerking cock, pulling him deeper into her and holding him in a tight grip. She felt like her skin was on fire in the most delicious way.

When she came down from her orgasm, Felicity leaned forward. She kissed Oliver gently before she rested her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes, trying to catch her breath. She could feel Oliver’s strong heartbeat against her rips and both of their hearts took some stumbling beats until their hearts were beating in perfect harmony. Oliver’s hands stroked gently over her spine and bump, caressing-

Felicity propped herself up onto one forearm and glanced at the loose ties at the headboard. When she lowered her gaze to Oliver’s face, she saw him smiling at her smugly.

“You didn’t really think that I wouldn’t be able to get out of them, did you?”

Felicity chuckled, resting her head back on his shoulder. “I probably shouldn’t.”

Oliver tightened his arms around her and kissed the crown of her head. “This was really, really nice.”

“Yes, it was,” Felicity agreed with a sigh, stroking her hand over his chest. “You know, I really love playing out your fantasies.”

“I am still waiting for you to create your own list,” Oliver replied.

“Maybe one day,” Felicity explained, “but for now I like the way that it is.”

“Well, whenever something comes to your mind...”

“I’ll let you know,” Felicity promised and kissed his Bratva tattoo. “For now all my hormones want is sex, no matter how.”

Oliver chuckled, kissing her forehead. “Oh, I might have realized that, and I like it in case it wasn’t obvious.”

Smiling against his chest, Felicity stretched herself. With a quiet sigh she snuggled herself closer to Oliver’s side. “I’m tired.”

“How about we take a shower to clean ourselves and maybe have some more fun and then we sleep?” Oliver suggested.

Felicity pursed her lips, tapping the tips of her fingers against Oliver’s chest. “Muscles and brain say no, hormones scream yes.”

“And that is why I like the hormones.”

 

 

Later that night the sound of a whiplash and the stinging pain that follows on Oliver’s back ripped him out of his sleep. His heart was racing in his chest, beating against his ribs firmly. His arms had tightened around Felicity in response, reassuring himself that Felicity was here, that she was safe and that he himself was safe.

“You okay?” Felicity asked sleepily and turned her head to kiss his bicep that she used as a pillow. Her hand made out his on her bump, and she laced their fingers.

“Yes,” Oliver replied quickly, trying to make his voice sound as little tense as possible. “Just thinking about how much I love you.”

Felicity smiled against his skin, still half-asleep. “I love you, too.”

Oliver felt her breathing even out as she fell back asleep. He took some deep breaths, trying to calm himself down from the nightmare. When it didn’t work, he pushed his nose into Felicity’s hair breathing her in. At least that had its usual calming effect on him. As soon as he closed his eyes, though, the memories were back.

He remembered kneeling on the cold ground on the island, lashed by a guard after he had come back from Hong Kong. He remembered how, right after he had come back from the island, he had received electro shocks from a masked guy who had wanted to know if his father had really died. He remembered kneeling on cold ground once more, watching his mother die and hearing his sister scream in pain at the sight.

Oliver kissed the back of Felicity’s head, staring into the darkness. He tried to figure out why all those memory were revived tonight. He hadn’t been forced to live through them in quite some time, at least not as heavily as he was being forced through them tonight. He had made peace with his past. He had learned to live with it rather than suffer from it.

He stroked his hand over Felicity’s bump, reminding himself on the life he had built here, a life that was far away from torture and all those heartbreaking memories, a life where he and his loved ones were mostly safe. When his wrist itched slightly from-

Oliver tensed. Being lashed, being electro shocked, watching his mother being killed – they all had one similarity.

He had been tied up one way or another.


	170. Regaining control

Felicity hadn’t reached the door yet when it already opened. Smiling, she saw Oliver standing in the doorframe with his shoulders hunched and his hands pushed into the pockets of his sweatpants. He looked at her with an expression of relief in his eyes.

“Hey,” Felicity said quietly.

When she stepped in front of him, she put a hand to his bicep, straightened up, and gently kissed his lips. It was meant to be only a short peck to his lips, but Oliver circled her waist with his strong arms and pulled her against him firmly. He deepened the kiss, stroking his tongue into her mouth. Felicity held onto the fabric of Oliver’s shirt, feeling dizzy by the intensity of this kiss.

Once their lips parted, Oliver brushed his nose against hers and then kissed her once more, only shortly this time, though. Felicity sighed against his lips. Only slowly she opened her eyes, lowering herself back onto her heels and looking at Oliver with a smile. She felt heat radiating off her face from the heat of the kiss and breathed out with a chuckle.

“That was quite intense,” she said, stroking her hands down his arms. “Not that I complain.”

Oliver moved his hands from her back to the baby bump. Felicity took hold of his wrists and moved his hands to where she could feel their baby kicking. He lowered his gaze to her bump and quickly leaned down to press a kiss to the top of it, right between his hands.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he whispered to the bump. “I hope you had a great day in there and didn’t annoy mommy too much.”

“No, the baby was all quiet and let me work. I think he or she is going to be more active later on then which means one more sleepless night for mommy.”

Felicity gently stroked her hand over Oliver’s short hair, but instead of continuing to talk to the bump a little more like he usually did, he quickly straightened up. Her hand fell away from his head, and Oliver caught it easily and pulled her into the house with him. As soon as the door was closed behind them, he turned back around to her and opened the belt of her coat. Felicity meanwhile dropped her purse to the floor carelessly and pushed it aside to the banister of the stairs, so it wasn’t in the way.

“I made dinner,” Oliver told her, taking the coat off her and putting it over the banister. “How about you go upstairs and get into something more comfortable and I’ll reheat some of the pasta for you?”

“Sounds great,” Felicity replied. “We could browse the web for wallpapers for the nursery, or did you find something already?”

“No, I didn’t even take a look yet. I wanted to do that with you.”

“Good,” Felicity said with a smile. “I was looking forward to do that with you too.”

Oliver smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. “I promised Emmy that you’d come and wish her a good night if she was still awake. She and William went to bed half an hour ago. He promised to read her a bedtime story, but we know our daughter better than that, right?”

Felicity chuckled. “It’s never just one bedtime story. I’ll go and save William then. Poor guy probably doesn’t want to keep reading to her all night.”

When Felicity turned around to the stairs to head upstairs, Oliver tightened his hold on her hand and tugged her back against him. His arms circled her waist once more, keeping her close against him. Felicity cocked her head at him.

“Are you alright?” she asked.

“Now that you’re here?” Oliver asked with a sigh. “Yes.”

“Missed me so much today?”

Oliver tightened his hold on her once more, hiding his face against the side of her neck. Felicity could feel his nose pressing against her pulse point, breathing her in. She gently massaged the back of his head, lightly scratching her nails over his scalp in the way she knew he enjoyed.

“You are cuddly lately,” Felicity said, “even more than usually.”

“Well, it’s getting colder outside, it’s only a little more than a month to Christmas and we are having a baby,” he said. “I think that are all very good reasons to be a little cuddlier than usually.”

“I am definitely not complaining,” Felicity replied, “though I would like to get out of my dress now.”

Oliver pulled back quickly, taking his hands off her and lowering his gaze to the floor. In the short break of a second that he looked at her, though, Felicity caught the expression in his eyes. He tried to smile it away, but she knew him better than that.

“Is everything alright?” she asked.

Oliver looked up with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He shrugged his shoulders, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants. “I’m just tired. I didn’t sleep much lately.”

Felicity frowned. “Why?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I haven’t been in the bunker in quite some time and I haven’t worked out much lately and just… I probably just need to get some energy off my system.”

“Am I not tiring you out enough?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

The hormones were driving her crazy lately. Touching Oliver was usually enough for her to crave sex. As soon as they touched, she wanted him, not matter the time and place. She was glad that at least sometimes she was able to control herself when she was around him. She hoped the control the hormones had over her were going to decrease from now.

“I don’t know,” he replied with a sigh, shrugging his shoulder. “Go changing. I’ll reheat your dinner.”

Felicity had already turned around and taken the first steps when Oliver held her back by saying her name. She turned around to him, cocking her head at the hesitant expression on his face.

“Maybe before we try to find the perfect wallpaper for the nursery we could talk?” he asked. “I think I would like to talk about something.”

Felicity frowned, considering asking him what was going on, but the look on Oliver’s face made clear that he needed another minute to sort things out for himself.

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “I’ll go change and then we can talk.”

“Thank you.”

Oliver’s shoulders were slumped when he turned around and walked over to the kitchen. Felicity frowned, looking after him. She was feeling more and more like something was bothering Oliver. He was bottling something up, and she doubted that it was only tiredness.

She hoped that was what he wanted to talk about once she had changed into something more comfortable. Her feet were aching because she was stubbornly holding onto wearing high heels for work, and she couldn’t wait to get rid of the tight-fitting dress to slip into one of Oliver’s hoodies instead.

As soon as Felicity had reached the topmost step, she slipped out of her shoes and took them into her hand instead. She tiptoed over to Tommy’s nursery and kissed her sleeping son’s forehead before she left and moved on to Emmy’s room. She could hear William’s low voice coming from the room, so it seemed like Emmy had made him read more than only one story.

When she quietly opened the door, Felicity found William sitting on Emmy’s bed with his back resting against the headboard. Emmy was sitting next to him, leaning against his side with her arms circled around his waist, while William had put one arm around her shoulders and was holding the book in the other hand. Emmy’s eyes switched between the book and William’s face, looking at him with an adoring smile.

“Hey, you two.”

Immediately Emmy jumped up on the mattress and right into her mother’s arms. “Mommy! Mommy! Mom-“

“Pssst,” Felicity hurried to make. “Tommy is sleeping.”

“Sorry,” Emmy whispered quickly.

“Hi, Felicity,” William said, waving his hand at her.

“Hey,” Felicity replied. “Everything alright at home?”

“Yes,” William replied with a smile, but quickly glanced at Emmy, who nodded.

Felicity chuckled. “Okay, I know those glances because, believe it or not, I am not that old yet. What did the two of you hatch?”

“Nothing,” William and Emmy both replied in chorus.

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head. “Yeah, sure.”

“Actually we wanted to talk to you,” William stated, closing the book and putting it aside.

“About daddy,” Emmy added.

Felicity looked from Emmy to William and back again, noticing that both of them looked slightly worried. Frowning, she sat down on the edge of Emmy’s bed and adjusted her daughter’s position on her lap, so Emmy was facing her older brother. Felicity looked from one child to the other with perked up eyebrows, but neither of them spoke.

“Okay, what is going on?” Felicity asked.

“Dad is weird,” William started.

“His hands are like this all the time,” Emmy added, lifting her hands and shaking them.

“He flinches when someone touches him without him seeing the movement coming and even when he sees it, he tenses easily,” William continued. “He is-”

“He’s not really daddy,” Emmy interrupted William. “He looks like daddy, but he doesn’t talk like daddy and he doesn’t behave like daddy either.”

“He’s so serious,” William explained. “I don’t know, but he seems off.”

Felicity nodded slightly. It looked like the situation was even worse than she had thought it was. If the kids had realized that something was off about Oliver, it wasn’t just something small. Oliver was usually good at pretending in front of other people and that could even include the kids. When the true state of his well-being had shone through in front of them, though, it wasn’t just a minor thing that bothered him.

“Okay,” Felicity replied quietly. “I don’t want you to worry, okay? Daddy’s just… Something is bothering daddy, and that is what makes him… be different. Anyway, I will take care of that, okay? How about you two watch a movie on my tablet here, and I take care of daddy?”

“Can we watch _Robin Hood_ , William?” Emmy asked. “It’s my favorite movie because daddy is-“

“Emmy, do you want to get the tablet from my nightstand already?” Felicity asked, keeping her daughter from babbling out the secret about her daddy’s secret identity.

“Okay,” Emmy replied, already jumping off her mother’s lap and running towards their parents’ bedroom.

Felicity turned to William, smiling at him comfortingly. “Your dad has been through a lot after the Gambit went down. Sometimes the memories grow too heavy on him, but it’s going to be okay.”

William nodded slightly. “It was just weird seeing him like that.”

“Yes, I know. If something like that happens, you can always call me, okay? Give me one call and I am home in ten minutes.”

“Okay,” William whispered.

Felicity waited until the kids had made themselves comfortable on the bed and switched on the movie. When she changed into a pair of sweatpants and one of Oliver’s hoodies, she thought about what could have happened that Oliver was pulled back into his past this much. There hadn’t been any date that could have triggered his behavior like Tommy Merlyn’s birthday usually led them to think about his past. He hadn’t spent much time in the lair because he preferred being home, especially now that Felicity was pregnant. It seemed like his priority was to fulfill her sexual needs and…

Felicity froze. “Frack!”

 

 

Oliver took in a deep breath, rubbing his hands over his face. He needed to pull himself together. Actually, he should have done so already. Those memories were part of his past, and his past should have been left behind by now. Memories like that shouldn’t torment him the way they were tormenting him right now. He had so many happy stories to tell and to remind himself of now, so why did the bad ones still bother him?

The memories had started coming back after he had asked Felicity to tie him to the bed for sex. He knew that the idea of making a connection to that was an easy assumption to make, but Oliver refused to believe it. He had enjoyed the sex with Felicity last week. He had enjoyed being tied to the bed and giving up all control to her. He didn’t understand how the sex with Felicity could have triggered memories of torture and pain. Of course he understood the connection to the ties, but it just wasn’t the same, so it wasn’t possible that -

Oliver shook his head, trying to shake those thoughts off of him. He had tried to figure out why the memories had only started haunting him after the sex and not while he had been tied to the bed. He hadn’t come to a reasonable answer, though, which was only one more reason why playing out that little fantasy couldn’t be the trigger for this.

What Oliver needed now was Felicity. He needed to tell her because saying all those things out loud was going to help him figuring this mess out. If it wasn’t, Felicity’s insight on things probably would. She would know exactly what was going on. She knew him better than anyone, so whatever she was going to say would help him.

He knew he should have told her already. If he had told her already, he wouldn’t have had to suffer through a week of emotional torture by the memories. He hadn’t told her, though, because-

When Felicity cleared her throat, Oliver flinched. He immediately cursed himself for doing so, but ignored it. He stirred the pasta once more before put it on a plate and asked without turning his gaze off the food, “Do you want some tea to your dinner?”

Felicity didn’t answer. Oliver was about to turn around and look if she had fallen asleep because lately she could fall asleep in the bathtub or on the couch or even standing in the doorframe. At least she easily fell asleep when she didn’t climb him like a tree. The hormones were messing with her right now, but he would choose this way over the part they had played in her prenatal depression anytime. Before he could turn around, though, he felt her body pressing against his back and her arms circling his waist. Felicity’s head pressed to the spot between his shoulder blades.

Oliver knew what this meant. This was more than Felicity being cuddly as she had put it earlier. He had seen in her eyes that she knew something was off with him. She wouldn’t miss anything like that no matter how well he had tried to hide it from her in the last couple of days. His shoulders slumped, his hands coming to rest on hers on his stomach.

“I wanted to tell you before you found out,” Oliver said with a sigh.

It was the truth. He had wanted to tell her about it himself because he trusted her and wanted her to know that she was the person he leaned on when he needed help and so much more. He didn’t like that Felicity had figured it out herself. As proud as he was that she knew him that well, he didn’t want her to think that he had been keeping this from her because he didn’t trust her.

“I-“

“Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him quickly and loosened her arms around him, so he could turn around to her. She waited until their eyes locked before she continued, “I am fine and I think that I am far away from another depression. I am really fine. I am just worried about you.”

Of course she knew why he hadn’t come to her immediately. His fear that he was leaning too much on her and stressing her out and that would favor another depression was something that had worried him since she had told him that she was pregnant.

“I-“ Oliver started, but he released a sighing breath and nodded to the kitchen island. “Let’s sit down, so you can have dinner. I’ll tell you everything, okay?”

Felicity nodded. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes and pressed her lips to his in a reassuring, lingering kiss. When she turned around, she still held onto his hand and only let it go when she was distancing herself further than their arms could reach. Oliver took the plate with her pasta and put it in front of her on the kitchen island before he sat down opposite of her. Immediately Felicity’s left hand reached out for his, and he took it in both of his hands.

“I’ve been having flashbacks all week,” Oliver admitted, looking at Felicity’s tiny fingers between his big hands. “Suddenly they started haunting me and I couldn’t shake them. I feel like someone is sitting in the back of my neck, watching me and waiting to attack. Sometimes I can feel the pain of the torture like it was just happening to me. The only person I can easily allow to touch me is you. Even with the kids it’s difficult. I don’t understand it, Felicity. Everything was fine. We are fine. The kids are fine. Our friends and family are fine. The city is as fine as it can be. I shouldn’t be feeling like this. I-“

“Hey,” Felicity interrupted him gently, squeezing his hand in a silent offer of comfort. “There is nothing wrong with what you feel. You have been through a lot, and I think it wouldn’t only be unlikely, but right out unhealthy if all those memories never came back to the surface. You can’t just ignore those memories and gulp them down. Even if you could, I wouldn’t want you to do it. You have me, and I am here to help you handling them.”

Oliver lowered his head and kissed the palm of Felicity’s hand. There were so many reasons why he loved Felicity more than anyone else and why he trusted her with what he felt more than anyone else. One of those reasons was definitely how she never made him feel guilty for his past and how it still managed to sneak its way back into his brain from time to time. When he had come back from the island, he had thought that what he needed was someone who made him forget about it and tell him to get over it because he wasn’t on the island any longer. Felicity had proved him wrong, though. She had proven again and again that what he needed was to understand how his past shaped him, but how he had at least some say of what role his past played for his present and future. He could decide where his past took him, depending on how he was going to interpret its meaning for him.

“I love you, and I trust you. I love and trust the kids. I-“ Oliver shook his head and lowered his gaze. He moved a hand through his short hair while the other was holding onto Felicity’s hand even more tightly. “Felicity, I haven’t felt like this in a long time. I think the last time it has been this bad has been when you and the kids were abducted. At least then I knew why it was and I was so focused on getting you back that I didn’t have much time to drown in the memories, but-“

Oliver stopped, shaking his head once more. He didn’t understand it, and he hated that. It would be easier if he understood what was going on with him. Feeling this lost without any idea why was worse than anything else. He hated the feeling of being lost like this without knowing why.

“When did the flashbacks start?” Felicity asked.

Oliver sighed, shrugging his shoulders. “It was late last Friday when we were lying in bed after…” At the sight of Felicity’s facial expression Oliver stopped. He knew the expression in her eyes and what suspicion it had caused it. He quickly tightened his hold on her hand and shook his head. “No, it’s not about that.”

“Oliver-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her firmly, shaking his head once more. “It’s not about the sex. I enjoyed the sex. It was good, amazing even. The flashbacks only started later. They didn’t relate to that.”

“Oliver-“

“No,” Oliver replied firmly once more. He got up from the bar stool and started walking up and down in the kitchen. He was torn between moving and holding onto Felicity’s hand, but the urge to move was stronger for now. “I thought about it, and I know it can’t be that because it doesn’t make any sense. You warned me that something like that might happen, so I thought about it carefully, and I was convinced that it wouldn’t happen. I am still convinced of that. There can’t be any connection.”

Felicity nodded slowly, holding his gaze and waiting for him to say more. Oliver looked at her for a long moment before he put his hands to his hips and lowered his gaze to the floor.

“Aside from the depression the reason I didn’t come to you about this immediately was that I didn’t want you to-“

“Please don’t say you thought I was going to say I told you so because I would never say something like that about something like this. I like saying that I told you so when I did tell you so, but I would never do this with something like this.”

Oliver chuckled sadly, shaking his head. When he looked back at Felicity, he saw her understanding gaze, and it made him sigh. He hadn’t thought that she would say that because hearing those words would have been so much easier than what he had feared she would say. Looking at her now, he knew that she wouldn’t.

“I thought you’d think that I didn’t trust you.”

Sighing, Felicity slid of her chair and walked over to Oliver. She circled his waist and rested her chin on his chest to look up at him.

“Oliver, if we needed to do some weird undercover stuff where we would have to get divorced and pretend to be over for good to protect this family, I would have problems dealing with that too. I know that you love me and I know that you won’t leave me. Pretending something like that is just way is too close to actually living through it. It would be too close to when my dad left and my fear of being abandoned. That is what you experienced. By giving up control to me like that you felt set back into the time you have been forced to give up all control. It just triggered the old memories.”

“I thought I was past that,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “I want to be past that.”

Felicity stroked her hands over his chest gently. “You’ve come a long way already, hon. Memories like that won’t ever completely go away. There will always be times that memories will be triggered again. You just need to remember that now you don’t have to go through that all on your own anymore. You have me, and I am always here for you. There is nothing you could feel about those memories that you have to be ashamed of or whatever with me.”

Oliver framed her face with his hands, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbone. He watched her face for a long moment, just enjoying the sight of her. She was beautiful in every way a person could be, and he loved her in every way a person could love another.

“I love you, Felicity,” Oliver whispered, “and you are one of the few people I trust with my life. I- I don’t know how to fix it or how to get out of this right now.”

Felicity kissed his lips gently, making him sigh into the kiss. When she started walking backwards until her back pressed against the edge of the kitchen counter, Oliver followed her easily. Their kiss never broke. Only when Felicity lifted herself onto the kitchen counter and pulled Oliver between her spread thighs, he broke the kiss.

“You didn’t touch your food,” he stated, glancing past her to the untouched pasta.

“I’m not really hungry,” Felicity replied with a shrug of her shoulders and glanced at her food. “Sorry, but I feel much more desire to help you right now.”

“And how do you think you can help me other than talking to me?” Oliver asked honestly, sighing quietly.

Felicity put her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, so his chest was pressing against her bump. He gently stroked his hand over the hoodie she wore, following the baby’s firm kicks. She – and nobody was going to convince him that the baby was a boy until he saw it himself – had grown to be more and more active lately. She was kicking whenever he and Felicity kissed, and she easily kept her mommy awake at night.

“What you need is the feeling of being in control about things,” Felicity answered.

She was moving her hips, so she was rubbing against him. Oliver held onto her thighs, making her stop moving. He looked at her with questioning eyes, and Felicity chuckled in response. She knew that whatever she tried to tell him with her actions didn’t really get to him yet.

“You need to be in control, Oliver,” Felicity whispered against his lips and kissed him softly before she leaned her lips against his ear and whispered, “so take control and fuck me.”

Oliver tensed slightly. He hadn’t heard those words from her often. Usually she said them when it was about him taking complete control, so he could reassure himself that she was here with him and none of his nightmares of her dying were true. In all those years of being with her he hadn’t grown used to those words coming from her lips. He didn’t know why.

“Felicity, you’re pregnant.”

“Shocking!” Felicity whispered, rolling her eyes at him. “I can still have sex, and now that the word is out, I crave it. I want sex, and I want to be taken by you and-“

Oliver didn’t need to be reassured twice. He pressed his lips back to hers, pulling her closer against him. If Felicity believed that what he really needed was to take control over sex with her, then he believed her. Probably she was right, and that was what she needed. He trusted her to tell him when it was getting to rough for her like she had trusted him to tell her when it was getting to rough for him when he had been tied to the bed.

Quickly Oliver pushed the hoodie over Felicity’s head and revealed her naked chest. She hadn’t put on a bra, so her boobs were pressing against his chest now. Oliver felt her nipples hardening against his warm body when he pulled her back against him and her nipples rubbed against the fabric of his shirt.

“You need to lock the door,” Felicity whispered against his lips between two kisses. “William and Emmy are still watching a movie and- oh my God, yes!”

Felicity bent her head back when Oliver pressed his semi-erect cock against her core more firmly. She held onto his shirt, pulling him close against her. Oliver meanwhile used the opportunity to kiss down the side of her neck. He licked her pulse point, enjoying the way he felt it beating against his flat tongue.

“Oliver-“ Felicity panted, continuing to move her hip against him and rub her core against his more and more hardening cock.

Oliver pushed his hands under Felicity’s butt and lifted her against him. Felicity wrapped her legs around his hips as much as the bump allowed her to. Her arms slid around his neck to hold onto him more firmly while he was carrying her away from the kitchen island. Oliver pushed her back against the door and thrust against her clothed core, making Felicity pant and move against him as well as she could.

“Lock the door,” Felicity demanded, gently biting down on his shoulder. “Now.”

Quickly Oliver pressed her a little more firmly against the door, so she had his left hand free to take the key from the upper edge of the door frame and quickly lock the door. As soon as he heard the clicking of the lock, he took Felicity’s hands and pushed them to the door over her head. If he wanted to take control, she couldn’t touch him. It was so easy to give up all control to her because he liked when she explored his body and made him feel every cell of him. If she thought that what he needed was to take control himself, though, she couldn’t touch him.

Oliver rubbed himself against her more and quickly got rid of his shirt. When his naked chest pressed against her naked chest, they both groaned. Oliver pushed Felicity higher with his hands under her butt, so he could close his lips around her nipple.

“Be careful,” he heard Felicity whisper.

His flat tongue pressed gently against her hard nipple, making sure he wasn’t too rough on her. He wanted to take control, but he didn’t want to hurt her. Her nipples were sore lately, and they could easily get hurt, so he knew that he had to be careful with them. Instead of biting down on the nipple like he ached to do, he just rubbed his flat tongue against it again and again until Felicity was panting and pleading with him to stop. He then moved over to the left nipple and gave it the same caress.

Slowly he let Felicity’s body slide down the door until her core pressed against his erection again. He moved against her a little longer, dragging his cock against her center and clit. Felicity moaned, bending her head back, and Oliver used the opportunity to kiss and nibble along the length of her neck.

“Oliver, I need you,” Felicity panted.

He ignored it, though. He kept pressing his cock against her core lazily again and again. He kept her turned on without ever allowing her to get too high in her pleasure. Her arms were fighting to get out of his grip, so she could put her hands on him, but he didn’t let her. Instead he moved his hands from her wrists to her hands, lacing his fingers though hers.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity whispered.

Quickly Oliver pressed himself closer to her. He kept both of her hands in one of his now, so he could use the free hand to slip it into Felicity’s sweatpants and under the fabric of her panties. They both moaned in unison when his fingers slipped through the wetness between her folds. She was so wet and welcoming for his fingers. He easily pushed them into her tight channel.

“God, yes,” Felicity moaned. She closed her eyes, resting her head back while she was riding his fingers.

Oliver pressed his hips against her more firmly, not allowing her to move. Felicity groaned in frustration, but it quickly turned into a long moan when he pushed his fingers deeper into her and stroked them against her inner walls.

“Yes,” Felicity panted. Her nails dug into the back of his hand, holding onto him so firmly.

She trusted him to make her feel good, and Oliver would. For now he was only lazily stroking her tight channel slowly, though. That way he could observe her face, watching the pleasure being overtaken from the frustration from time to time. He was in control of her pleasure. The movements of his fingers inside of her decided how high he was taking her and how much pleasure he was offering her.

When Oliver pressed his thumb to her clit and moved it in the same quick pace as his forefinger and middle finger moved inside of her now, Felicity released a long moan. She bit down on her bottom lip, silencing the sounds of pleasure. Oliver watched with enjoyment how a deep red color spread from her cheeks down her neck to her chest the closer she got to her orgasm. When she finally came, Oliver pressed his lips to hers. He swallowed all her little moans and sounds of pleasure she made while her inner walls were clenching around his fingers to pull them deeper into her. He let go of her hips, allowing her to move, so she could ride out her orgasm.

Once her breathing had calmed down, Oliver let go of her hand. Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck quickly and moved a hand into his short hair, so she could bend his head back and deepen the kiss. They moaned into each other’s mouth, breathing the same air.

“I need you inside of me,” Felicity whispered. “Now.”

Quickly Oliver turned around from the door and lowered them to the floor. He blindly reached out for the hoodie Felicity had worn before and pushed it under her back to make it more comfortable for her. He got rid of his sweat pants and boxers in one go before paying attention to the clothes left on Felicity. He untied the bow on the front of her sweatpants and slowly pulled them off of her. He then pushed his fingers into her panties and pulled them off her too.

Once they were both left naked, Oliver took hold of her right leg and slowly kissed from her ankle up the inside of her leg. For the briefest second he thought about eating her out because the scent of her juices was beguiling, but Oliver knew that Felicity had problems with being eaten out lately. She reacted to each of the touches of his hands and lips and tongue against her folds, entrance and clit. Unfortunately, the hormones made her even more sensitive to his touch. There was always a thin line between heightening her pleasure and making her oversensitive, but with the hormones running through her body the line was even thinner. He didn’t want to experiment tonight. He wanted to make her come again.

He kissed up her stomach, nibbling at her belly button that had popped out by now. He chuckled quietly when he felt their baby kicking against his lips. Felicity stroked her hands over his head and scratched her nails over his scalp gently.

When Oliver sat up, he pulled Felicity’s legs over his and circled her waist with his arms. He lay back, so Felicity was sitting in his lap. She put her hands to the tiles next to his head and leaned down to kiss him passionately.

“What happened to taking control?” Felicity asked before pressing her lips back to him.

She moved her folds along the length of his cock and Oliver groaned into her mouth, giving her the opportunity to stroke her tongue against his.

“I took control,” Oliver replied against her lips and stroked his hands over her butt, “but I also don’t mind if you take a little control.”

Hearing those words, Felicity sat up and took hold of the base of his cock. She lowered herself onto him slowly, taking him all the way in. They both let out deep moans of pleasure. Felicity’s warm channel was tight around his hot skin and so welcoming for him.

When she started rocking her hips against him, so his cock pressed against her inner walls, Oliver quickly sat up. He put his arms around her and answered her thrusts with movements of his own hips. Their lips met in a passionate kiss. Oliver could almost taste how much she needed to come again now.

Felicity’s movements quickened soon. She leaned back a little, so their lips parted. She put a hand to his knee behind her and moved against him with more force. The slightly changed angle allowed him to hit spots even deeper in her, and they both acknowledged the change with a moan. Their eyes locked over the sound of skin slapping against skin.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered.

“I’m close,” he replied, knowing that that was what she needed to hear.

Felicity panted, biting down on her bottom lip to keep herself from moaning out loud. When he felt her clenching around him, revealing that she was right on the edge of her orgasm, Oliver moved, so he was kneeling on the floor. Felicity’s back was pressed to the floor when he thrust into her a few more times. It only took two firm thrusts for her to come with a long moan. Oliver quickly lowered his lips to hers, swallowing the sounds of pleasures, so nobody but him would hear. One more thrust and he came too, jerking inside of her.

Their lips stayed locked for some more time. They were lazily thrusting against each other, riding out their orgasms. When Oliver slipped out of her, they broke the kiss. With their eyes locked they both chuckled quietly before Oliver rested his head on Felicity’s chest with a sigh and listened to the beat of her heart. Her hands pushed into his hair, stroking his scalp.

“I love how after years of marriage and having kids we can still have sex on the kitchen floor like this,” Oliver said, still panting slightly.

“It’s one of the many things I love about our marriage,” Felicity replied with a quiet chuckle. She pressed a kiss to the crown of his head. “Are you feeling better now?”

Oliver sighed and kissed the top of her breast where he could feel her heart beating. He lifted his hands in front of her face, proving that they weren’t shaking anymore. Chuckling, Felicity took them and kissed the palms of his hands. They lay in silence like that for a long moment, neither of them talking. It was a comfortable silenced that they both used to catch their breaths.

When Felicity’s hands drifted down his back to her butt, Oliver rested his chin on her breast and looked at her face, asking, “What are you doing?”

“I think you should take control once more.”

“Again?” Oliver asked, perking up an eyebrow.

Felicity smiled innocently. “The hormones are strong again today.”

Oliver chuckled. “Okay, so then let’s give the hormones what they want, right?”


	171. Sexual overdrive

“The kids are in bed which means we can finally get back to screwing each other’s brain out.”

Oliver turned around to Felicity, about to say something. Before he could even take in a breath, though, his wife had already pushed him against the fridge. Her lips were sucking at the side of his neck, her teeth grazing his pulse point. Her hands were meanwhile stroking up and down his chest with her nails lightly scratching him through the fabric of his shirt. Her hips pressed as much to his as the bump allowed her to. Since she was 25 weeks along now, that was easier said than done.

Oliver cleared his throat. “Really? Again?”

Felicity chuckled, circling his waist and looking up at him with a seductive smile. “Well, we didn’t have sex in at least four hours.”

“It’s only been a little bit more than three hours,” Oliver corrected her.

“Well, that is still too much time,” Felicity replied and kissed his chest through his shirt. “So where should we do it? We didn’t do it in the kitchen today, but the couch, the bed and the shower are equally okay. Or we could have sex on the washing machine again. I think it turned out to be a really nice place for sex before dinner, right?”

Oliver pressed his lips together, clearing his throat. “Felicity, I think we need to talk.”

“I suggest we have sex, talk after that and then go for a second round,” Felicity countered. “We need to use the time the kids are napping as best as we can.”

“Since it is the sex we need to talk about, I think we need to talk about it now,” Oliver explained with slightly tense voice.

Felicity hummed, smiling at him. Her hands moved up and down his chest, stroking the hard muscles. “Do you have another fantasy we should fulfill? I am all in for that.”

“No,” Oliver replied firmly and caught her hands when they were moving lower to the waistband of his sweatpants. He held onto her wrists and kept them between their bodies, but far enough from him that she couldn’t touch him. “We need to talk about your sexual overdrive, Felicity, because it is getting out of hand.”

“Sexual overdrive?” Felicity asked, cocking her head with a chuckle. “Come on, I am a little hornier than usually, but you like that.”

“Oh, I liked when you were only a little bit hornier than usually, but it’s way more than that by now,” Oliver explained.

Felicity frowned, eying him up closely. “Are you really complaining about too much sex?”

Oliver pressed his lips together. It was the same question he had asked himself all day today. Was he really complaining about that? He had a beautiful, hot wife that wanted to be laid several times each day. It was probably a dream come true for a lot of men. Felicity’s increased desire for sex had its downsides, though. Slowly those downsides were taking over.

“I never thought I’d ever say that,” Oliver replied, “but yes.”

The frown on Felicity’s forehead deepened. She looked at him without understanding like he had just talked to her in a foreign language. She pulled her hands out of his grip, crossed her arms in front of her chest and then slowly went two steps backwards until she was leaning against the kitchen counter. Her eyes never left his face.

“Does this have anything to do with the fact that I am gaining weight because-“

“God, it has nothing to do with that,” Oliver interrupted her quickly, shaking his head. “I love having sex with you. I love having sex with you when you’re pregnant, and I can feel the bump pressing against my stomach and feeling our baby kick. I love everything about it. I would just prefer if we could have sex a little less often, though.”

“Less often?”

“Yes.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him. “Are you saying that you are getting tired of sex with me?”

“No,” Oliver said with a groan.

Chuckling sadly, he went over to Felicity. He put his hands to her hips and pulled her a little closer, still keeping some distance between their bodies, though. He knew how easily Felicity got turned on lately, and he didn’t want to help with that. Her on-going state of always being turned on was the very reason that had brought him into this trouble, so he had to talk to Felicity about it.

“Felicity, sex with you is always great, but we had sex six times today and four times both yesterday and Thursday and we didn’t exactly lived as a celibate before, so it wasn’t about catching out on missing out opportunities of having sex,” he told her. “That is a lot of sex for only three days.”

“Oh, come on! Now you are exaggerating. We did not have sex fourteen times in the-“

“Thursday morning around three a.m. you woke me for lazy morning sex. When you had to get up to go to work, you surprised me in the shower. You headed home for lunch break, and we had sex in the kitchen. When the kids were in bed that night, we watched a movie which ended with sex on the couch. Friday started with a quickie in the changing room. Then we had sex in the bathroom attached to your office when I brought you the files you needed that afternoon. In the evening we took a bath together and finally had some more lazy sex in bed before falling asleep. This morning you woke me up with sex once more. Then we had sex on the couch when the kids were playing upstairs. We had sex in bed and then in the shower when they were napping. We had sex on the washing machine before dinner and then a quickie in the storeroom when they were watching their cartoon right before bedtime,” Oliver reminded her. “You know I love you, and you know I love having sex with you, but this is a lot of sex. I have to honestly admit that I have no idea how I got him up those last times. Felicity, I feel completely empty, and I swear that you can climb me like a tree right now, and he wouldn’t be impressed by that at all. I would be impressed, but he wouldn’t.”

Felicity glanced down between his legs for a moment before looked back up at him with puckered lips. “We really had sex that often?”

Oliver nodded his head with a sigh. “Felicity, I mean what I said before. I love having sex with you, but as you like to point out I am 36 years old. I am not the youngest anymore, and I have trouble performing.”

Felicity looked at him for a long moment, then lowered her gaze between his legs for a moment and finally looked back up at him again.

“Little Oliver is failing me,” she replied with a dramatic sigh, obviously enjoying his embarrassing too much to not use the opportunity to tease him. She sat down on one of the bar stools at the kitchen island. “I can’t believe it.”

“Well, firstly, there is nothing little about me-“

“Yeah, as long as he is refusing to work for me, I will continue to call him that. Little Oliver is a fitting name for something that refuses to help me with my hormones.”

“And secondly, please don’t go there. I feel bad enough as it is.”

Felicity put an elbow to the kitchen counter and propped her head up on her hand, watching him with a pouty face. How could he not feel bad? This had never happened to him when he hadn’t been completely drunk and since he had been with Felicity, it had never happened again, no matter how drunk he had been. She was easily turning him on. Seeing the curve of her ass or her full lips was all it took to be turned on. Even her pouty face right now was a slight turn on for him, but his friend down there just refused to react in the way it was supposed to do. When Felicity had been pregnant with Emmy, she had gone into sexual overdrive, and he had hit his limits, but he had still been able to fulfill her sexual needs, but not this time. This time her hormones were outdoing his stamina.

“And now?” Felicity asked.

“I think I need a day off from… sex.”

“A whole day?”

“A whole day,” Oliver said with a nod of his head.

“All Sunday?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

Felicity sighed. “Fine. And then?”

“Then we need a plan on how many times we can have sex at max.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. “That is terribly boring. We are turning into stuffy couple that has sex on appointment.”

“Hey, it’s just for as long as he needs to rest,” Oliver told her. “Once he is all fit again, we can have sex as often as you want it again. For now he needs a break, though.”

“He is ruining our marriage, you realize that?” Felicity asked, gesturing down at his pants.

Oliver cleared his throat. “He is just a little tired out.”

“Can I have a second husband to fulfill my needs?” Felicity asked, fluttering her eyelashes.

“No,” Oliver simply replied.

“A lover?”

“No.”

Felicity sighed dramatically, and Oliver had to bite back a chuckle. He was glad that Felicity was taken kindly to it and teasing him about it. He could have easily seen an alternate reaction where she had been much more upset about his failure.

“So starting with Monday, how often do we have sex each day?” Felicity asked and quickly added, “And I am not going to let you talk me into only weekly sex. I need daily sex.”

“Daily sex,” Oliver replied with a nod of his head. “That’s fine. We have sex once a day.”

“Only once?”

“Two at the weekends.”

“But Friday counts as weekend too, right?”

“If you want that, yes,” Oliver replied with a smile, nodding.

“And Mondays?”

“No.”

Felicity sighed. “That makes ten times sex a week. I have no idea what to do with my hormones the other times of the week.”

“We could agree on some extra times that I make you come with me fingers and tongue.”

“Hm,” Felicity made, not seeming particularly excited. “That’s not the same.”

“Toys? I hear there are great toys to-“

“No.”

Felicity stretched out her arm on the countertop and rested her head on her upper arm. She pushed her bottom lip forward and tapped her fingertips on the counter. She looked bored and actually kind of sad, and if the way she was glancing at him every now and then was any indication, she was doing this on purpose.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” Oliver said slowly.

“Okay, if you set up the rules for the number of times we have sex, I want to set up rules too,” Felicity said, straightening up. “You are not allowed to turn me on anymore.”

Oliver nodded. “That’s only fair, and I am sure it is going to help the both of us. So tell me what I can do to make it easier for you.”

“You can’t say my name in this slow way that accentuates each syllable anymore.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied nodding his head. “Anything more?”

“Oh, I have a long list of things you are not allowed to do anymore,” Felicity replied with a slightly dry chuckle. “From now on you will have to wear socks all the time, even in bed.”

Oliver chuckled. “Fine.”

“And you are not allowed to chuckle anymore.”

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest. “No more chuckling when you are around.”

“You are not allowed to cross your arms in front of your chest.”

“Fine,” Oliver replied, uncrossing his arms and putting his hands to the counter behind him. When he realized her disapproving eyes, he cleared his throat. “I guess I am not allowed to stand like this either?”

“Right,” Felicity told him and let out a dramatic cry. “Come on, you need to stop existing for me not to want you anymore. Everything about you is turning me on.”

She dropped her head to the countertop with a groan. Oliver licked his lips and watched her for a long moment, trying to find a solution to their problem. He wanted to help Felicity dealing with her hormones, but he also knew that there was no way he was going to get his friend to work in the next hours and if he was going to overuse him again, he was probably going to fail for longer than just a few hours like he hoped it was the case right now.

Oliver leaned against the kitchen counter next to Felicity and asked with deep voice, “How about you come with me to the fitness room, so you can enjoy the sight of me working out until I am all sweaty? I mean you could really, really enjoy it.”

Felicity lifted her head from the counter and looked at Oliver. She perked up an eyebrow. “You don’t really think that I am going to reward little Oliver for not working anymore by letting you watching me have fun with myself, right?”

Oliver pressed his lips together. Yes, Felicity was definitely going to punish him for not-

“What are you doing?” he asked when Felicity put her hand to his cock over the sweatpants and started stroking him with firm, precise movements.

“I am waking him up,” Felicity told Oliver, grabbing his shirt with her free hand and pulling him closer to her. “I am not giving up this easily. He is not old enough to malfunction yet.”

“Felicity, he is just a little tired. We need to charge his battery by letting him rest a little,” Oliver said and then frowned. “And I have no idea why we are talking about him like he is a vibrator or something.”

“Maybe because I have more sympathy if a vibrator is overused and doesn’t work anymore,” Felicity told him. “For something that is attached to my husband it is unacceptable.”

Oliver, chuckled, but it quickly died when Felicity straightened up as much as possible and pressed her lips to his. Oliver put a hand to the back of her neck and angled her head, so he could deepen the kiss. He was easily getting aroused by the kiss. The taste of her lips and tongue on his and the feeling of being embraced by the sweet scent of her skin made him want her so much. He wanted to rip down her sweatpants and take her right here, taking control by taking her hard and fast until she was moaning in pleasure.

Unfortunately, as much as his brain and heart and every cell of his body wanted to have sex her right now, there was one indispensible part that just refused to join in on the fun. Oliver stepped closer to Felicity, rubbing his hips against hers more firmly. Felicity snuck her hand under the waistband of his sweatpants, taking him into her hand and stroking gently.

Oliver pleaded with his member to wake up and react to her touch, but like Oliver had said before he felt empty. He just didn’t get him up.

“Okay, that is not going to work,” Felicity said with a groan, pushing Oliver a little away and out of her reach. “I hope you know that you will have to level up on the intensity of orgasms you give me when we have sex now since the number is clearly limited now.”

“I will,” Oliver promised with a nod of your head. “And I’m sorry.”

Felicity smiled, shrugging her shoulders. “I know I am exhausting when my hormones are taking over, and it probably was a lot of sex lately. I think you kept up pretty good.”

“Thank you.”

“For someone of your age,” Felicity added in a mumble.

When Oliver cocked his head, she smiled at him innocently and Oliver chuckled.

Felicity pulled him closer and kissed him gently in silent gratitude. When she deepened the kiss, Oliver put his hands to the side of her bump, gently stroking it. Her hands moved into his hair, playing with the short strands at the back of his neck. She gently bit into his bottom lip and rubbed her hardening nipples against his chest.

“Does it work?” Felicity asked against his lips after some time.

“Nope.”

Felicity sighed, slumping slightly on her chair. “Fine. In that case I will go upstairs and just have some fun with myself to get rid of the current horniness. Maybe after that I can try to take back control over my body, but I don’t have high hopes.”

“You know I could come with you and help you having fun.”

Felicity chuckled and pecked his lips before she went to the door, saying back over her shoulder, “I told you that little Oliver doesn’t get rewarded for failing.”

“Maybe if he watches you, he realizes what he is missing out on.”

“Oliver,” Felicity said, turning around to him and leaning in the door, “when little Oliver doesn’t know what he is missing out on by now, then that’s his problem.”

She blew him a kiss and winked before she turned and around and headed upstairs. Oliver grumbled quietly and looked down at his unimpressed cock in his sweatpants.

“Do you see what you’ve done?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair “warning”: at the end of the next chapter we will begin with the angst or rather drama storyline. I changed the category to drama because unlike the prenatal depression, the abduction and the Baby Mama plot, this won’t be this angsty. It’s really more drama than angst. It won’t last very long either, but it might take some time until it is written because unfortunately I have to go back to university on Monday. 
> 
> Next chapter will be posted Thursday!


	172. The family we choose

Holding the cup of ginger tea in both of her hands, Felicity leaned into the door to the living room. She rested her head against the cool wood of the frame and used the fact that the kids hadn’t noticed her yet to just watch them quietly.

Emmy was kneeling in front of the couch table, drawing a picture while humming a song Felicity couldn’t recognize yet. William was sitting on the floor next to her with Tommy on his outstretched leg. They were looking at what had used to be both Emmy’s and Tommy’s favorite storybook when he had been younger. Tommy had gotten it downstairs early today and was now telling his older brother what was happening on each page as well as he could put it to words. Lately, Tommy had become a lot more talkative.

“…dog goes to park,” Tommy told William over Emmy’s humming. “He see flowers. He see trees. He see… butties?”

“He sees butterflies, yes,” William replied with a smile.

“Butties.”

Emmy giggled, shooting her brother a glance. “Not butties, Tommy. The word it butterflies.”

“Butties,” Tommy said again, shaking his head before turning the page. “He meets other dog. Dogs run together. Dogs play. Dogs make hearts. And babies!”

Tommy smiled proudly at William and hugged the book close to his chest. William chuckled.

Are you that happy about the new baby in this family, too?” William asked his little brother.

Felicity loosened a hand from the cup and put it to the bump, gently stroking her hand over it. She traced the movements of the not yet born addition to the family with a smile. Only fourteen more weeks were keeping her from meeting this little nugget. Where had the time run?! It was like yesterday she had discovered that she was pregnant. As much as she wanted to hold her baby in her arms and see him or her interacting with Emmy, Tommy and William, Felicity also wanted to enjoy each second left of the pregnancy.

After the depression she had experienced during Tommy’s pregnancy, she appreciated all the happy memories she had gathered during this pregnancy the more. She had had a lot of happy moments while she had been pregnant with Tommy, but this time it was just easier. The fear of falling back into depression was there, but she was so far away from that it almost felt like the depression had been part of a different life.

“What baby?” Tommy asked.

“The baby in mommy’s tummy, silly!” Emmy replied with a giggle. She dropped the pen to the couch table and turned to face Tommy. She took hold of his wrists and made her little brother clap his hands. “And we are very happy about her!”

Tommy giggled, continuing to clap his hands even after Emmy had let go of his wrists. “Yes, baby!”

“You know, it could also be a boy,” William told Emmy.

Emmy scrunched up her nose. “I want a girl and daddy too.”

“Really?” William asked.

Emmy nodded. “Daddy has two sons. I have two brothers. Now I want a sister.”

“I thought you wanted to stay dad’s only little girl.”

“I’m his big girl, William,” Emmy explained with stern voice. Felicity knew how easily she got offended when someone implied that she was still little or, even worse, not Oliver’s girl anymore. “The baby will be his little girl.”

William looked slightly taken aback about his sister’s reaction. He pressed his lips together in the same way Oliver always did and eyed his sister up closely like he was trying to reassure himself that Emmy was not mad at him. Felicity knew that William hadn’t missed the special bond between Emmy and Oliver because it was actually impossible to miss that. Felicity herself had wondered if Emmy was going to dislike the idea of having a sister because she felt her position in Oliver’s heart was threatened by a baby girl in the family. Felicity should have known that her daughter was above such thoughts and fears.

“What do you want, Tommy?” William asked his brother. “Do you want a sister or a brother?”

“I want baby!”

William chuckled. “Yes, but a baby boy or a baby girl?”

Tommy frowned. “A baby.”

“Mommy says he doesn’t understand everything yet,” Emmy explained. “I think Tommy wants a girl too.”

“You think?” William asked.

Emmy nodded. “I don’t want to share daddy. Tommy doesn’t want to share mommy even more. Right, Tommy?”

Tommy nodded. “Tommy and mommy.”

Felicity smiled. Tommy was her little boy, and Emmy was right. Emmy didn’t exactly like to share her daddy, but that didn’t compare to how possessive Tommy was about his mommy. It had gotten a lot better with both of them over time. Yet Tommy’s first choice was still him and mommy.

“What do you want, William?” Emmy asked. “Do you want a sister or a brother?”

“Hey, what’s-“

“Pssst,” Felicity quickly hushed Oliver and put a finger to her lips.

When he frowned, she reached out a hand for him. Oliver put his fingers into her hand and let her pull him closer until he was standing right behind her. His warm chest pressed to her slightly aching back, and Felicity sighed soundlessly at the feeling of warmth at her lower back. She put Oliver’s hand to her bump, keeping hers on top it. Oliver leaned his head over her shoulder, following her eyes to the kids.

His stubble scratched her cheek lightly, and Felicity had to bite her tongue. After she had gone in full sexual overdrive last weekend, Oliver had demanded a limited number of times they had sex. Instead of having sex whenever she felt like it like it had always been with them, they only had sex once a day now, two on weekend days. They had had sex this morning, but since it was Saturday, he still owed her sex once today. Unfortunately Felicity doubted that it was a good idea to have sex already. They had just had lunch, so the day was still long. Her hormones would have to wait to have their needs fulfilled for a couple hours more.

“I don’t know,” William finally answered to Emmy’s question. He shrugged his shoulders. “I have a brother and a sister, and you are both nice. I think the baby should just be healthy. Besides, we don’t get to choose if it is a girl or a boy anyway.”

“I get to choose,” Emmy told him.

“No, you know, it’s biology and-“

“No, no, no,” Emmy interrupted him. She shook her head vehemently, making her blonde curls jump wildly around her round face. “I get to choose. Mommy and daddy always say that we have two families. One we are born with and one we choose. I choose for the baby to be a girl.”

“I don’t think your parents meant it like that, Emmy.”

“Yes, they did,” Emmy replied. She lowered her voice to a whisper that Felicity almost didn’t hear over Oliver’s breathing when she added, “Do you want to know a secret?”

“Uhm… sure,” William replied hesitantly.

“I chose for Tommy to be a boy too,” Emmy whispered, leaning closer to William. “I wanted to name him Nemo, but mommy and daddy said no. Sometimes I still call him Nemo, though. Now for this baby I choose it’s a girl.”

“Maybe it’s a boy, though.”

“No,” Emmy replied, shaking her head, “because I chose a girl.”

William chuckled, looking at Tommy. “What do you think? Is our sister right?”

Tommy nodded. “Yes. Yepp. Yes. Yes. Yes.”

“Well, that’s a definite yes apparently,” William said with a chuckle.

Felicity smiled. The sight of the three children interacting like that just warmed her heart. She couldn’t wait to see how the baby was going to fit into that and change the dynamic. She knew how Emmy was around little babies, so it was going to be even more interesting to see the boys interacting with their baby brother or baby sister.

Oliver pressed his lips to the crook of Felicity’s neck and tightened his arms around her. Felicity bit her tongue, releasing a low sigh. She wanted to just lean back and enjoy the feeling of his lips against her sensitive skin for a moment before she would turn around and kiss his soft lips. She wanted to take off his shirt and-

“Oliver, don’t start something you are not planning to finish.”

“Still horny?” Oliver whispered into her ear and gently kissed the soft skin right under it.

“Little Oliver still malfunctioning?” Felicity asked back.

She only shot him a short look over her shoulder and kissed the corner of his mouth to make sure he knew that she was only teasing him. She winked, when she left the warm embrace of his arms. While Felicity stepped into the room Oliver stayed in the doorframe, watching her.

“Mommy, can we all watch a movie together?” Emmy asked.

Felicity was about to answer that that was a great idea when the image of what that would look like popped into her mind. She would lie snuggled up to Oliver. His hard muscles would press against her soft forms. His fingers would play with the bare skin that was revealed thanks to the cutouts at the back of the dress, and he would slowly move them lower until-

“Mama?”

Quickly Felicity cleared her throat to shake off her thoughts. She looked down and found Tommy standing in front of her, tugging at her dress and looking at her with his big, blue eyes.

“Hey, what’s going on, Buddie?”

“Mama, let’s watch a movie?”

“You want to watch a movie?”

Tommy nodded his head. “Watch Peter Pan?”

“How about you ask Emmy, William and daddy if they like that?”

“Aren’t you watching with us?” William asked.

“We can watch something else, Mommy,” Emmy suggested.

“No, Peter Pan!” Tommy demanded, crossing his arms in front of his chest and making a pouty face. He looked unbelievably cute when he was pushing his bottom lip forward and ducking his head a little. He had his father’s eyes that were almost impossible to resist. “Peter Pan, Mommy.”

“You need to talk to Emmy and William about that, Tommy,” Felicity told her son. “Mommy is going to go out.”

“We could all go out in the park or something,” Oliver suggested. “It’s not raining and-“

“No, no,” Felicity interrupted him, shaking her head and setting Tommy back to the floor. “I think I need a little alone-time and-“

“Play Pokémon Go?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, smiling at Oliver innocently. “Maybe.”

She turned around to the kids, intending to ask if they were okay if she left them alone for like one or two hours, but they were already deep in their conversation about what movie they should watch. Obviously they didn’t bother too much that Felicity was going to leave them for awhile. Oliver pushed his hands into the pocket of his sweatpants and nodded towards the door.

“See you later, kids.”

“Bye, mommy,” Emmy said.

“Bye, bye,” Tommy replied, waving his hand at her distantly.

“See you later,” William added.

Shaking her head slightly, Felicity followed Oliver to the door. He helped her into her coat, knotting the belt for her and adjusting the collar to make sure she wouldn’t be bothered by the cold wind. Holding onto the collar of the coat, he pulled her closer and then gently kissed her lips. Felicity sighed, leaning against him and rubbing her hands up and down his upper arms.

“How long are you going to keep going out to play Pokémon Go every day?” Oliver asked.

“As long as I need to take back control over my hormones,” Felicity told him.

“How are you handling taking control over them so far?”

Felicity chuckled. “I still have to go out playing Pokémon Go to stop myself from thinking about all the ways we could have sex right now.”

Oliver pressed his lips together and Felicity leaned her forehead against his chest, closing her eyes with a chuckle. The hormones were just messing with her, and she knew how much Oliver hated that he couldn’t satisfy her needs anymore in the way the hormones wished he could. Felicity also knew that her sex drive was far from normal or even satiable right now, though. It was probably better that Oliver had put a stop to sex or had at least decreased the number of times they had sex.

“I thought we could start talking about names in the near future,” Oliver suggested, gently rubbing his hands up and down Felicity’s arms. “We didn’t so yet, and I think it’s time. We both know that we need time with names, especially in cases like this.”

“Cases like this?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow.

“Given that Emmy and I both believe it’s a girl, I think it’s a safe bet that the baby is indeed a girl.”

Felicity chuckled. “Are you a psychic now?”

“No, I’m not,” Oliver replied, “but our daughter might be.”

Felicity shook her head slightly, and Oliver leaned down to gently peck her lips.

“I think we should wait until next year,” Felicity stated. “Otherwise chances are high that I am going to use little Oliver’s failure against you.”

Oliver cleared his throat, mumbling under his breath, “I think I told you that calling him little Oliver is not encouraging him.”

Chuckling, Felicity straightened up to the tip of her toes and kissed Oliver gently.

“See you later,” she said.

“How long will you stay away?”

“Maybe an hour,” Felicity replied, pulling her phone from the pocket of her coat. “If I find something interesting, it might be longer, though.”

Oliver nodded, opening the door for her. “You know, the good thing about your sexual overdrive is that you don’t urge me to come with you to play that weird game anymore. Honestly, running through the city to catch those little things is-“

“Oliver, be careful. Little Oliver has already gotten into my disgrace. You don’t want the same to happen for the rest of you.”

Smiling in amusement, Oliver pulled his lips into his mouth and pressed them together. Felicity winked when she walked past him and casually stroked her hand over his chest.

“Be careful,” Oliver called after her.

“Always,” she promised, turning around once more to blow him a kiss.

She strolled down the street with her phone in her hand, holding out for a Pokémon she could catch. She loved this game because it easily distracted her from everything. When she didn’t head home for a longer lunch break, she sometimes went around and played Pokémon Go. It cleared her head. For awhile she had dragged Oliver to come with her, but he just didn’t understand her love for this game. Well, it was probably the only thing he didn’t really understand about her.

Felicity sighed. She didn’t seem to be lucky with finding Pokémons today. Sometimes she found these funny, little creatures easily, and sometimes they seemed to all be hiding from her. She had considered hacking into the server and trying to find something that could help her, but there was no fun in cheating with things like this. If it continued like this, though, she wouldn’t get rid of all the vivid images of all the fun things she and Oliver could do together.

In the last days her imagination had been filled with fantasies of how Oliver took her hard a fast while she was bent over whatever surface she had been able to think of. Today was different, though, because today all she could see was Oliver kissing and sucking at the side of her neck while he was lazily thrusting into her again and again. He was taking her higher and higher in her pleasure with each thrust, whispering Russian words against her skin. His hands explored her body, stroking over-

“Frack!” Felicity whispered to herself, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk.

She could almost feel the touch of Oliver’s lips against her neck and his gentle fingers on her back. She could even feel herself growing wet, ready to taking him in deep. If she continued like this, she was going to be hornier when she returned than she had been before.

Felicity released a deep sigh and turned around, intending to head into a different direction where she was maybe more lucky to find Pokémon and distraction. The quick, careless turnaround sent her bumping right into someone, though.

“Oh, my god,” she quickly gasped, stumbling a step back. “I am so sorry. I was in my thoughts and didn’t-“

“No, it was my fault. I should have paid more attention.”

At the sound of the voice that brought a distance familiarity Felicity looked at the man she had just run into. He was a tall, slim man in a black coat. He had his hands pushed deep into the pockets of it. His oval face that was almost as familiar as the soft, deep voice. It was his dark green eyes that pulled her in, though, giving her a feeling of recognition.

She remembered making eye contact with him and smiling at him with joy when they had shared a secret. She remembered searching for pride in those eyes whenever she had managed to attend a task he had set for her. She remembered the fear of seeing disappointment when she had failed to understand what he had explained to her with his soft voice.

“Hello, Felicity.”

Felicity eyed him up once more quickly before lifted her gaze back to his face. He was smiling at her gently, hiding it behind a serious expression that she had seen so often. The last time had been long ago, but she had never forgotten his face or the expression on it. He had grown older. There were wrinkles in his face she hadn’t seen before. His hair was grey now. Yet there was barely any doubt for Felicity about who he was.

“Dad?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess you can already assume what storyline we are going to address next. You can be sure that we will see some parallels to what happened on the show, but I tried to do justice to the differences in the situation between this Felicity and the Felicity we see on the show. I hope this will make sense later. 
> 
> And don’t worry, the drama won’t take very long. Four chapters from now everything will be resolved. ;)


	173. The family we are born with

How long had she imagined this moment? How long had she wondered what he would look like and sound like? How many times had she wondered whether she would still recognize him if she ever incidentally ran into him? How many times had she wondered what he would say to her and what she would say to him and how she would feel about seeing him again?

Felicity remembered that most of the times she had thought about seeing him again, she had told him all the words of disappointment and anger she had never been able to tell him. Sometimes she had yelled at him, using her loud voice, but most of the times she had been quiet and controlled. She would have told him everything he had put her through and how she had only come out stronger. She would then tell him that as a teenager she had always wanted to see him again and have the chance of a relationship with him, but that those times were long gone.

There were so many things she wanted to tell him. There were things she had talked off her chest again and again when she had talked to Oliver about it, but she felt like she needed him to hear it. He was the reasons she was feeling all these things, so he should be forced to listen to it. It was the least he owed her, wasn’t it? To listen to what his sudden disappearance from her life had put her through?

Felicity couldn’t speak, though. Her mouth was dry, and her thoughts were running wild. All the scenarios she had imagined for meeting him again were playing in her mind like a movie, mixed with thoughts about how she had never thought this would actually ever happen to her. She doubted that she could even form a coherent sentence at the moment.

She was just staring at the man in front of her, trying to figure out if that was how she had thought he would look. She couldn’t remember if she had ever really thought about what he would look like, at least not in the last years. He still looked like the man she had admired in the first years of her life, but time had left his marks on him. His hair was grey and his face showed wrinkles. Yet he still looked like him and-

“You know, it’s strange, seeing your baby girl expecting a baby.”

Several possible answers ran through Felicity’s mind. She could taste all of them on the tip of her tongue, beginning with how she was not his baby girl and ending with how it would probably be less strange if he had seen her at least once in the last twenty years. Felicity didn’t say anything, though.

“I know it must be difficult for you to see me again after all this time,” her father continued. “I’ve been in Starling City for a few days now. I wanted to come and visit you already, but I only gathered my courage today. I arrived when you left the house, and decided to just approach you, but I didn’t dare to until you stopped here. I know it took a lot of time, but I am glad I came here to see you.”

Felicity tried to progress his words. She tried to understand what was going on. Had he come to Starling only to see her? Even if that was the case, why would he want to see her? Why now? She hadn’t been living under a rock in the last years, so he could have easily found her before. God, even if she had been living under a rock, he would have been able to find her. He was a hacker, just like her.

“I know this has to be a lot for you to take in, Felicity,” he said with soft voice, giving her a warm smile. “For now I just need you to know that I want a relationship with you. I want to get to know your family, my grandchildren. I know I lost a lot of time, but I don’t want to lose another year or even another day with you. I am staying at the Plaza for now, and I would be very happy if you called me today or any other day, so we can talk. I want to talk to you openly about everything. I know it is a lot to ask, but I would love to have a chance.”

He would like to have a chance? How many years had Felicity hoped to get a chance to get to know her dad? How many times had she wished that he would ask this? But after more than twenty years that she had been inexistent for him, he just came here and right out asked her this like it was no big deal? An apology or actually… Well, actually no apology since she couldn’t recall that he had apologized yet, but he already asked for a chance? Like she owed him something and not the other way around?

It took awhile until Felicity realized that he was holding out a business card for her. Criminals that tried to keep a low profile to be not found by the police really had business cards? Admittedly, that had never really occurred to her. He held it out a little more to her, urging her to take it. Felicity didn’t want to take it. She wasn’t even sure if she was able to move and indeed take it from him. Standing opposite to him without doing anything was awkward, though. Unsure of what else to do, Felicity lifted her hand and took the card from him. Her muscles were feeling tense, almost like they were fighting the movement. She carefully avoided touching him and pulled her hand back quickly like it had gotten burnt as soon as she felt the paper between her fingers.

“I would be very happy if you could give us a chance, Felicity,” he said. “I would like to have a chance to explain myself to you and figure out what person you are. I want to get to know you. I know that is a lot, though. I suggest you think about it and call me when you have decided.”

He put his hand to her shoulder and squeezed gently. Felicity wanted to step out of his touch and shake off his hand, but she was frozen into place and unable to move once more. He was looking at her with the same soft smile that his face had shown before already. It would probably be forever burnt into her memory from now on. They stood there like this for a moment before he went past her and walked away.

Felicity didn’t look after him. She blindly stared to the empty street in front of her, trying to process what had just happened. Not only had she run into her dad, but he had come here because of her? He wanted a relationship with her?

For years that had been everything she had wanted. She had wanted him to come back because of her. She had wanted him to want a relationship with her. She had had so many fights with her mom that had left her lying in bed with her blanket pulled over her head, wishing he would come to her. Even later on in college she had hoped that he was keeping an eye on her, seeing how great she was at all the tech stuff he had taught her to love. She had hoped that he would be proud of her and he would realize that it had been a mistake to leave her and he would come back to her.

But now? Now Felicity was not sure she wanted that anymore. She didn’t even know how she felt about seeing him again. Was she relieved? Happy even? Was she disappointed that it had taken so long? Was she worried that he had second thoughts? Was she angry that he had come back after all these years of acting like she didn’t exist?

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment, trying to figure out what she was feeling, but no matter how urgently she asked her heart or brain or soul or whatever part of her body was supposed to be responsible for this, she didn’t get an answer. She just felt numb.

 

 

“Should I take a look at your essay?” Oliver asked William, looking back over his shoulder without ever stopping to chip the champignons for the new lasagna recipe he wanted to try for dinner today. “You said it was important for your grade.”

“Thanks, but Felicity said she was going to take a look at it,” William replied.

“Well, Felicity is not here right now.”

William chuckled. “That might be true, but I am still waiting for her to be back because she seems to know a lot about Shakespeare. Besides, she just seems smarter than you in general. No offense.”

Now it was Oliver’s turn to chuckle. “If I was feeling offended by everyone that thought that way, I would be offended by almost everyone, starting with myself to be honest. The truth is that Felicity is smarter than me. It is as simple as that.”

“It’s kind of cool how smart she is.”

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed with a proud smile before he glanced at his watch and frowned. “I am just wondering where she is. She wanted to be home already.”

“Are you worried?”

Sighing, Oliver put the knife away and turned around to William, who was looking at him over his schoolbook. William looked honestly curious about his father’s answer, so Oliver wanted to reply as honestly as possible. With Emmy and Tommy it was easier because they knew about their parents’ secret identities, well, at least as much as Tommy could understand that. William didn’t know about that, though, and Oliver didn’t see that changing anytime soon.

“Felicity can take care of herself,” Oliver replied honestly, “but that doesn’t change that I will always worry about her. It’s the same about Emmy, Tommy and you. I can’t stop it.”

William smiled for a moment before he glanced past Oliver and then said, “You don’t need to worry. I just saw her ponytail, so I guess…”

He gestured with his pen to the door just when the sounds of keys in the lock could be heard. Oliver released a deep breath that made William chuckle quietly. Shaking his head, Oliver turned back to the kitchen counter and continued chipping the champignons.

“You know, we were just talking about you,” Oliver said without taking his eyes off the champignons when he heard Felicity stepping into the kitchen. “I’d say it was only positive, but since you left me alone almost all day I think I need to-“

Oliver stopped midsentence. He had looked back over his shoulder, intending to shoot her an amused look, but it had turned into an intense gaze once he had seen her face. Slowly he turned around, taking her in closely. Felicity’s face was pale, her eyes slightly widened. She was taking deep, uneven breaths. Her bottom lip was trembling slightly. She looked shaken, utterly and completely shaken.

Slowly Oliver pulled the dish towel from his shoulder, addressing her quietly, “Hon?”

Felicity took in another breath. She opened her lips about to say something, but no sound came out. Quickly Oliver stepped forward to her. He put a hand to her cheek, bending her head back a little, so she was looking at him. Her blue eyes showed confusion and maybe shock. Oliver brushed his lips against her forehead before he pulled her against him, hugging her close. Even in his arms Felicity didn’t move, though. She didn’t put her arms around him or snuggle her face to his chest.

Oliver rubbed his hands over her back. His mind was running wild, trying to find an explanation for what was going on with her. What could have happened? She had only been out to play Pokémon Go. What could have happened during that time?

“Felicity, what happened?” Oliver asked in a whisper.

“I-“ Felicity started, but her voice broke. “I need to sit down.”

“Yes, of course,” Oliver replied immediately. He led her to one of the free bar stools, helping her to sit down. He opened the belt of her coat and Felicity quickly slipped out of it. She put her phone to the kitchen island, while her left hand stayed in the fist it had been formed to before already. “I’m gonna get you a glass of water, okay?”

Felicity nodded, taking in a deep breath through her lips. When Oliver turned around to get her a glass of water, he noticed William’s insecure gaze. He obviously considered sneaking away and-

“My dad came back.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows, looking at Felicity. It had been more than twenty years since he had left her and Donna and had never tried to make contact with them again. One of the first personal things about Felicity he had learned had been how much her relationship with her father as well as the lack of one later on had shaped her. She had trusted Oliver with that knowledge long before they had been together. Only over the years that had followed he had really learned to understand how deep her father’s influence on her had been, though, and sometimes he felt he was still learning more about it the longer they were together.

No wonder she was shaken! That man had left her, broken her in a way that had took her a long time to repair. And even now there were still some cracks in her soul from what he had done. As much as Oliver loved how strong it had made her, he hated to know how small she had felt because of her father in the past.

“And why is that a bad thing?” William asked while Oliver was pouring Felicity a glass of water.

“My dad left when I was a kid, and he never even let me and my mom know that he is still alive,” Felicity explained. When Oliver put the glass on the kitchen island in front of her, she quickly took a few gulps. Putting the glass back to the counter, she sighed. “I’m sorry for freaking out like that. I-“

“You don’t have to apologize,” Oliver said, putting his hand on hers. “Everybody would be upset after meeting the dad they haven’t seen in more than twenty years. Did he say what he wants?”

“Apparently he came here to have a relationship with me.”

Oliver frowned. He wasn’t sure what to think about that. A part of him had always hoped that one day she was going to be that lucky to get the chance of building a relationship with her dad. Oliver was leery, though. How many times did a father come back after all those years without second thoughts? He didn’t want Felicity to get hurt, especially not by the one man that had already hurt her so badly before.

“But that’s a good thing, isn’t it?” William asked.

Felicity and Oliver both looked at him. Oliver frowned. “William, I don’t think-“

“Well, you came back into my life, and now I have a real family. I mean I don’t only have my mom anymore. I also have a dad, a stepmother, three siblings and an aunt. It’s cool, but it wouldn’t have happened if mom and I hadn’t given you a chance, right?” he replied before he looked at Felicity. “So maybe it’s a good thing your dad is here, Felicity. You can build a relationship with him like I did with dad.”

Oliver smiled at William, feeling his heart warming at his words. They were lucky they had been given the chance to get to know each other. They had missed out on a lot of each other’s life, but now they truly were part of each other’s family. William was Oliver’s son and Oliver was William’s dad. What were the odds that Felicity was going to be just as lucky and she was truly offered a second chance with her dad?

Fact was that, while Oliver hadn’t known he had a son, Felicity’s dad had left her behind. He had known her and helped to raise her for several years. Then he had willingly put his criminal ambitions over his daughter’s wellbeing. He had rather run and left her behind than become an honorable man who took responsibility for his actions. Sure, in prison he wouldn’t have been the best dad, either, but at least Felicity would have been given the chance to still see him if she had wanted. She wouldn’t have felt like he had given up on her because for some reason she wasn’t enough for him.

Oliver didn’t know if he would have been a good dad if he had known about William from the start. He doubted it actually because he hadn’t been a really good guy before the island and he had had even more trouble in his first years back. As Felicity had pointed out to him once, he couldn’t know for sure, though. Maybe he would have held his son in his arms and changed to be a good dad to him. Maybe he wouldn’t have been the amazing dad he was now, but at least he would have been around and tried his best. Maybe he would have failed, but only then it would have been truly his fault that he and William hadn’t had a relationship all those years.

His point was that Oliver didn’t know how his relationship to William would have developed if he had had the chance to get to know him from the start. His mother and Samantha had taken that chance from him. Felicity’s father had had the chance to have an influence on his daughter’s life and to teach her important values and give her trust in the world, though, and he hadn’t made her a priority.

“It’s not the same, William,” Oliver only whispered, squeezing Felicity’s hand.

William shrugged his right shoulder uncomfortably, and Oliver gave him a comforting smile He knew that it must look like the same situation, but it really wasn’t.

“Where are Emmy and Tommy?” Felicity asked.

“Upstairs, playing in Tommy’s room,” Oliver answered.

“I will go… and take a look at them,” William hurried to say. He quickly slid off the barstool to escape the kitchen, obviously relieved to finally have a way out.

Oliver looked after him only shortly before he focused all his attention on Felicity. Luckily, some color had returned to her face by now. She looked exhausted but way less shocked than she had been before. The fist her left hand had been clenched to before was now playing with a piece of wadded paper.

“Is that his card?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded. “Yes. He told me I should call him when I am ready to meet him.”

“Are you considering it?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity said. Sighing, she moved her hand over her hair and closed her eyes. “I really don’t know. I-“

“Okay,” Oliver said calmly. He framed her face with both of his hands and waited until she looked at him before he added, “Take a deep breath.”

Felicity did as he asked. She took in a deep breath while her eyes stayed locked on Oliver’s. He remembered asking her the same when Cooper had returned and used her virus to mess with the city. Back then he hadn’t dared to hold her like this, though. They hadn’t been together, and he hadn’t been able calm her down this easily. Now he could, so he did. He gently stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones, just watching her. He almost expected her to cry, but no tears could be seen. Oliver just gave her the time she needed before she relaxed her face into his hands a little more and gave him a nod, telling him that she was okay.

“Okay,” Oliver whispered once more. “Tell me everything.”

“There really isn’t much to say,” Felicity said with a sigh. She took his right hand from her face and held it in hers. “I kind of bumped into him while I was playing Pokémon Go. It took me a few seconds, but I recognized him quite soon. I was so shocked that I couldn’t even speak. I was just staring at him.”

“Well, everyone would be shocked back that,” Oliver told her, squeezing her fingers.

Felicity nodded, resting her head on her hand with a sigh. His other hand fell off her face too and he took the one of her hands he was holding in both of his. He lifted it to his lips and kissed her knuckles before he pressed the palm of her hand to his chest right over her heart. Her fingers moved over his chest gently for a moment, her eyes following the movements.

When she locked eyes with him once more, she continued, “He told me he has been here for a few days because he wants a chance to get to know me. He said he wants to catch up on everything he has been missing out on and… I don’t know… He gave me his number, so I can call him when I feel ready. There really isn’t much to say. I think he realized that I was too much in shock to talk to him, so he left.”

Oliver nodded. “How are you feeling?”

Felicity chuckled sadly. “I’m still trying to find that out.”

Oliver brushed his lips against her forehead gently. Felicity took in a deep breath and rested her head on his shoulder, loosely circling his waist with her arms. Oliver sighed quietly, relieved that she was leaning on him. He stroked his hands over her back comfortingly, not saying a word.

“You know, I wanted to see him in so long,” Felicity said, pulling away a little, so she could look at him once more. “I thought I needed this one last meeting with him, so I would have some closure on it. I wanted to tell him so many things and…”

Felicity sighed shaking her head. Oliver just rubbed his hands over her arms, waiting for her to continue. He couldn’t imagine what she was feeling. All he knew was that he wanted to help her deal with it. She wasn’t alone with this.

“The thing is that I always imagined a meeting like that would happen on my terms,” Felicity continued. “I wanted to be the one calling the shots about when or where we meet and what we talk about. Instead I was so surprised that I didn’t get a sound out. I actually just want to meet him again, so I can tell him that I don’t ever want to see him again.”

Oliver pressed a lingering kiss to Felicity’s forehead once more. “I would gladly stand beside you and cheer you on.”

Felicity chuckled. “With pompoms?”

“Will a certain part of me get back in your good graces when I say yes?”

“No,” Felicity replied with an amused smile. “It would only help to take Little Oliver even less serious than I do already.”

Oliver grumbled quietly. “He is not little.”

Chuckling, Felicity pushed herself closer to Oliver and straightened up onto her tiptoes. He tightened his arms around her waist as soon as her lips brushed against his. With a low sigh he angled his head and deepened the kiss, pouring all his love for her into it. When they parted, Felicity licked her lips, her eyes still locked on his. She smiled for a moment longer before her face fell slightly, the seriousness back in her eyes.

“On the other hand, maybe he has changed, right?” Felicity asked, and Oliver pressed his lips together, holding his breath, in response. Felicity only needed the blink of a second to understand. “You don’t believe that.”

“I think…” Oliver sighed, rubbing his hands over her back. He shrugged his shoulders, smiling at her slightly. “I think we both know that I have trouble forgiving, especially when it comes to people that hurt the ones I love. I think he could turn out to be the best father in the world now, and I would still keep at least strongly disliking him for what he put you through.”

“Despite the fact that you said everything I have been through only shaped the person I am today, a person you love very much?” Felicity asked.

“Despite that, yes,” Oliver replied firmly, nodding his head. “I love what you made of the pain he caused you. I love how strong you came out of all of that. I still don’t like that you had to go through that in the first place.”

Felicity smiled at him and mouthed a soundless “I love you”. Smiling, Oliver leaned down and brushed his lips against hers in a brief kiss. Only then he mouthed the same words back.

“So what do you think I should do now?” she asked him, holding onto his biceps and rubbing her hands over the undersides of his arms.

Oliver sighed quietly. “I honestly don’t know, Felicity. I think that is a question that only you can answer. No matter what you decide, I will be by your side and support you.”

“Even if I choose to give him another chance?”

“Even then.”

“Thank you,” Felicity said with a sigh of relief.

She pecked his lips shortly before she straightened up onto the tip of her toes and put her arms around Oliver’s neck, holding him close. He ducked his head, pressing his nose against the side of her neck and kissing her pulse point. He could feel their baby kicking against his stomach and smiled against her skin. If the way Felicity pressed the bump more against him was any indication, she noticed the smile of his lips against hers.

They stayed in this close hug for some time, holding each other without saying anything. Oliver hoped that he could take away all the bad memories that had probably been caused by seeing her dad again. He knew that she was the only person who always managed to distract him from bad memories, and he hoped that he could work that same magic on her now. Old memories that had influenced a person as much as the island had influenced him and her dad had influenced her always found a way to crawl under one’s skin when they came back.

After awhile Felicity sighed, tightening her hold on Oliver once more for a moment. “I’ll go upstairs, take a look at the kids and change into something more comfy.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” Oliver replied.

Felicity smiled at him when she loosened herself out of the hug and Oliver softly kissed the tip of her nose. He squeezed her hand gently before she turned around and left the kitchen. Oliver looked after her, sending a quick prayer to heaven that she wouldn’t have to add another bad memory to the pool of bad memories she had already gathered regarding her father.

 

 

_So maybe it’s a good thing your dad is here, Felicity. You can build a relationship with him like I did with dad._

These two sentences kept echoing through her thoughts again and again. They had been on her mind ever since William had said them. During the rest of the day she had watched William and Oliver interacting. They really had built a strong relationship. If Felicity didn’t know, she wouldn’t assume that Oliver and William hadn’t been part of each other’s life from the start.

They had been given a chance to form a real relationship, and they had made the best of that. Sure, it had been a complicated start, for the two of them as much as for everyone else involved, but they had made it. William had become a part of this family.

Felicity would lie if she said that she had never felt a stitch of jealousy when seeing Oliver and William interact. She had thought about her relationship with her own father when watching the two of them together. It was just that she had always thought she would never be this lucky.

With a deep sigh Felicity rolled onto her back and out of Oliver’s arms. Staring into the darkness she wondered from what hidden corner of her heart this desire to build a relationship with her father was coming from. For years whenever she had thought about her dad all she had wanted was to find closure. Why was that different now?

“I can’t sleep,” Felicity whispered.

She knew that Oliver was awake and watching her. Just like she had been unable to fall asleep, so had he. She had felt it in the slightly tension in his chest and the way his hand had moved over her back. His hand was now resting on the bump, lazily stroking over the curve.

“Yeah, I can’t stop thinking too.”

For awhile neither of them said a word. They both just stayed quiet, breathing in and out in the same rhythm. She put her hand to Oliver’s on the bump, holding it to her. The baby wasn’t moving tonight. For once it seemed like their unborn child had decided to use the night to catch up on a little sleep.

“I think I have to meet him,” Felicity whispered. Oliver didn’t answer, but Felicity could hear him taking in a deep breath. She turned her head, looking at him in the darkness. “I think I need to know what he has to say or otherwise it will haunt me for the rest of my life. I know that you think that is a mistake-“

“I never said that,” Oliver hurried to say.

Felicity smiled at him, reaching out a hand for his face. She gently stroked her fingers over his stubble. Her thumb touched the corner of his mouth, and she could feel him smiling slightly against her skin. He turned his head and kissed her thumb.

“You didn’t need to say it,” Felicity replied. “I know that you are worried that he is going to hurt me. So am I to be honest, but I still need to talk to him. I need to hear what he has to say.”

“I hope you don’t feel like you owe him that because you don’t. You don’t owe him anything.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered back. “I owe it to myself, though. I owe it to myself to get some answers. Either that will lead to get some final closure on this subject or maybe to a second chance. I never thought I would even consider giving him a second chance, but I think in some way William is right. If he had never taken the chance to get to know you, he wouldn’t be part of our family now.”

“My history with William was different, though.”

“I know,” Felicity said with a sigh. “And I am not even convinced that it will go that way. It will probably end badly, but I need to do it nonetheless.”

Oliver moved on the bed, sliding closer to Felicity, and she turned onto her side. Her bump pressed against his stomach and her nose bumped against his with every intake of breath.

“Like I said before, I am supporting your decision,” Oliver promised. “Do you want me to come with you when you see him?”

“No,” Felicity said with a sigh, squeezing his hand. “I think that is something I should do alone.”

“You are not alone.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered, angling her head until her lips were brushing against Oliver’s, “and for that I am very grateful.”

“When will you see him?”

“The sooner, the better,” Felicity explained. “I will call him tomorrow to see when would be a good time. I think a café would be a good place to see him, especially because there is coffee though, now that I think about it, I can’t drink coffee, so maybe a café is not the best place to meet him. It wouldn’t be fair to give him the upper hand by giving him access to caffeine that I wouldn’t be allowed to-”

“You know, I doubt that a cup of coffee is that bad even during pregnancy,” Oliver interrupted her babbling.

Felicity was quiet for a moment. Teasing her about not drinking coffee during pregnancy was usually one of Oliver’s favorite things to do. She knew he worried about her, so she just replied in a whisper, “I’m fine. Please don’t worry that much.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied in a whisper. “I am here for you whatever you need.”

Felicity sighed. “I feel like a heavy weight is lifted from my chest now that the decision is made.”

Oliver moved his hands from her bump to her lower back. His warm hand snuck under her shirt and rested against her skin. Felicity sighed at the comfortably feeling. She leaned forward and kissed Oliver gently. His tongue slipped into her mouth, gently stroking against hers, and Felicity moved closer to him in response.

“How late is it?” she asked against his lips.

“Around eleven-thirty I think,” Oliver replied. “Why?”

Felicity put her hands to his face, framing it. Her right hand moved into the hair at the back of his neck. She deepened the kiss, pressing herself as close to Oliver as possible.

“Oh, I see,” Oliver mumbled against her lips between two kisses. “Now that the weight has dropped off of your chest, the horniness is back, yes?”

Felicity chuckled. “It’s Sunday. Little Oliver still owes me some action.”

“He doesn’t like when you call him that.”

“Well, he can prove me wrong if he feels offended.”

“He is certainly going to prove you wrong,” Oliver replied and turned her, so her back was pressed against the mattress. He was hovering over her, his nose gently nuzzling hers. His laced his fingers through hers, squeezing gently. “I love you.”

Felicity smiled back at him, knowing he could see it even though the room was completely dark. “I love you too.”

Oliver slowly lowered his body, pressing it to hers. Their lips met in a slow kiss and for the first time since the last hours she was feeling whole and safe again, like she was where she belonged.


	174. Sins of the father

“I’m glad you called,” Noah broke the tense silence that had settled when he and Felicity had sat down opposite of each other at the table in the café Felicity had chosen for their meeting. “I know it probably wasn’t easy for you to decide giving me a second chance.”

“I haven’t decided about that yet,” Felicity replied with tense voice.

“Then why did you come here?”

Felicity looked at her father with stern eyes, trying to figure out what she should answer. Fact was that she still hadn’t really found out why she had decided to see him. She knew in the back of her mind that meeting her father involved the danger of getting hurt again. She knew that and yet she had decided to meet with him. She was about to change the topic when the waitress approached them.

“What can I get you?” she asked with a smile plastered to her lips.

“A coffee for me please,” Noah replied.

“Yeah, for me too,” Felicity replied automatically but quickly decided otherwise. “Or wait. No coffee.” She put a hand to where the baby was kicking her and stroked her hand over the bump soothingly. “Do you have hot milk?”

“Sure.”

“Thanks.”

Felicity looked down at the bump, watching her hand moving over it. Oliver had said that he didn’t mind if she drank a cup of coffee. Studies even showed that a little bit of caffeine wasn’t that bad in the pregnancy. Felicity had read up on that when she had been pregnant with Emmeline. She refused to quit on her no-caffeine-policy during the pregnancy, though, and she certainly wasn’t going to quit on it because of her father.

“Your mom always made you hot milk when you were younger,” Noah said with a smile.

“I am surprised you still know. How old was I when you last saw her doing that for me? Six?”

Felicity didn’t miss that her voice sounded bitter. She didn’t mind, though. She had been bitter for years and she was bitter now again. The fact that he talked to her like he hadn’t missed more than twenty years of her life and basically every important achievement she had made really made her bitter.

“You’re right,” Noah replied. He crossed his arms on the edge of the table and leaned forward a little. “I don’t suppose it helps if I say I thought staying out of your life was the best thing for you. I was protecting you and your mother.”

Felicity let out a dry chuckle. “You were only protecting yourself because otherwise you would have taken responsibility for the crime you committed instead of packing your things and leaving your family.”

“I couldn’t have taken care of you from prison, Felicity.”

“You didn’t take care of me from wherever you were the last years either, so what’s the point?” Felicity asked angrily.

She felt like he was trying to take her a fool with what he said. How should he have taken care of her if he had never contacted her? If Donna had let Felicity know one thing about Noah, it was that he had left without taking care of them. There had been no money left, and he had disappeared without a warning.

“Did your mom ever tell you what type of criminal I was?”

“She stayed vague about it, only said it had something to do with cyber criminality,” Felicity replied, slightly taken by surprise by the sudden change of subject.

“I want us to speak openly,” Noah explained, “and that is why I-“

He stopped when the waitress approached them and served the drinks. Felicity took her mug into both of her hands, letting the warm porcelain warm the palm of her hands.

“Why I should explain to you who I was and-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted him firmly, shaking her head.

“No?” Noah asked, perking up an eyebrow.

“No, I don’t want you to explain anything to me,” Felicity replied. “I want you to answer my questions.”

“You want to interrogate me?”

“If you want to call it that way, yes.”

Noah nodded. He took a sip of his coffee. “Please ask me whatever you want. I will answer to all your questions with all honesty.”

“For now I just have one question,” Felicity replied. “Why now? You could have easily found me in the last twenty years, so why now?”

“I have always kept an eye on you, Felicity,” Noah answered with low voice. “I brought you something to show you how important it was to me to know that you are safe and happy.”

He reached out to the seat next to him and took his tablet. After he had moved his fingers over the screen for a few seconds, he held the tablet out to her. Felicity hesitated, but eventually took it from him.

“What exactly am I looking at?” she asked before even lowering her gaze to the screen.

“Just open the folder and you see,” Noah suggested.

Felicity bit her tongue. She didn’t like how this meeting was going. This wasn’t how she had imagined it would go, and it certainly wasn’t how she had wanted it to go. She didn’t feel like she was calling the shots here, but at the same time she was too curious. She was too curious about what her father had to say to stop and take over the say, so taking in a deep breath she lowered her gaze.

The folder was titled ‘Baby girl’. Felicity bit her tongue, resisting the urge to look at her father. Instead she opened the folder and perked up an eyebrow when she looked at the files inside of it. She could see hundreds of files and most of them seemed to be newspaper articles about her. Felicity got a quick overview of the files, finding the earliest was dated back to the time she had been at MIT and her super virus had created chaos. The newest was a short comment on her clothing style as a pregnant business woman in reference to a photo that had been taken when she had been on a lunch break and spending time with her family. Emmy was sitting in her lap while Felicity was showing her something at the tablet.

Felicity scrolled through the articles, looking at some of them. It looked like he had gathered every piece of information he had found about her in the news or at least everything he had been able to backtrack to her, Felicity thought with a frown. Though there was that piece of new about the deleted data at MIT, there wasn’t anything about the Arrow’s work. Felicity had gotten a lot better at covering her tracks since then, so apparently he had failed to find a connection between her and the Arrow. Most of the articles were about her private life or her work at Queen Consolidated, Palmer Technology and Queen Industries. Even if she had only been mentioned once in a side note, the article was there.

Felicity took in a deep breath, keeping her gaze strictly to the screen. Like so often when it was about something her father did, she didn’t know how to feel about this. Should she feel better because he had kept an eye on her or should she be offended because he had invaded her privacy like this? Of course those were articles that everyone had access to, but collecting them like this, especially given their history, seemed like it should make her feel uncomfortable. Besides, if he had been so interested in her life all those years, then why had he never reached out and at least tried to rebuild a relationship with her?

“What is all of this supposed to tell me?” Felicity asked, looking up from the tablet to look at her father instead. “You managed to gather whatever the news had to say about me. That doesn’t exactly earn you a prize as father of the year.”

“No, of course not,” Noah answered seriously. “I have been a lousy father. I admit that. When I left, I left to protect you and your-“

“Yeah, we’ve already been there, and I still don’t believe you,” Felicity interrupted him.

“Felicity, I have been a hacker. That is why I should have been arrested twenty years ago. I tried to do good, though. I tried to help people,” he told her, and Felicity frowned. “I know the super virus at MIT was created by you. I doubt that it was used in the way you would have wanted it to be used, though. When I found out that you were trying to use everything you had learned to do good, I was so unbelievably proud of you. I know I didn’t have anything to do with it, but the fact that you still took after me with that just made me so proud.”

Felicity frowned at him. “Let’s just assume for a moment that I believe that you are not a criminal but some kind of… whatever hacker activities like that would make you, why didn’t you contact me back when I was in MIT?”

“I was,” Noah answered. “I wanted to reach out, so we could talk. I felt you were old enough to estimate the risk of letting me into your life. I thought you deserved to make the choice yourself. Given what we had in common and what I thought we could achieve together in the future, I felt like it was time.”

Felicity’s frown deepened. What said made sense except for the fact that he hadn’t shown up. He hadn’t been in Boston when she had mourned Cooper’s death, and he hadn’t been there in the years until she had found out that Cooper had never died or even after that. He had never showed up again.

“When I realized that your boyfriend’s betrayal had far more influence on you than I had expected, I decided to take a step back and give you some room. I thought it wasn’t the right time after all. It would have been too much for you if I had shown up at that time,” Noah explained. “I was waiting for you to give helping people by using your skills a new try, but nothing happened.”

Nothing had happened, Felicity repeated in her thoughts. He really hadn’t found out about her work with the local vigilantes. She knew she was good at what she was doing. She didn’t know if she had ever thought that she was better than him. Was she really that good? Had he found out and just didn’t tell her? Or hadn’t he dug deep enough to find out?

“It took me awhile until I realized that you have changed the way you are helping people.” Noah smiled at her slightly, cocking his head. “You are using the company and your family’s foundation to do so. It is honorable, but it also underestimates how much more you could be able to do.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes. “Is that why you are here? To tell me that I am not using my potential right and-“

“No,” Noah interrupted her, shaking his head. “I think you could do more, but I understand why you might refuse to take the risk. If someone caught you hacking, even if for some good reasons, you could lose your family like I did. It’s no risk I would ever want you to take because I wouldn’t want you to lose what I have lost.”

“Then why are you-“

“Fact is that you have more potential than you are using right now,” Noah continued. “I didn’t want you to take the risk of losing your family, but if we worked together, you wouldn’t have to. We can work together and help people. I would be taking all the risk. If anything got wrong and we were ever getting caught, I would take all the blame. You could do the good your skills are made out for without taking any risk if you gave me a chance to protect you like a father is supposed to protect his child.”

Felicity took in a deep breath. For the last twenty years she had thought her father was a heartless, reckless criminal, who had put his egoistic plans and criminal ambitions above his family. Now that he sat here in front of her and told her all those things, though, it was so tempting to just believe him. They had always had so much in common, so maybe their will do use their skills to do good was one more thing. It was tempting, but as Felicity had told John years ago, she was blonde, but not that blonde.

“Why should I believe any of this?”

“On the tablet to you can find a record of all the hacks I did recently,” he told her. “You can keep it as long as you need to. I am sure you will be able to verify them by news accounts. I hope that will be enough to show you that what I am saying is the truth.”

“I will take a look at that,” Felicity said seriously.

Noah nodded, giving her a long look. Felicity didn’t look away, holding her father’s gaze. Though it had been so long, she could still feel some kind of connection to him. He understood all this tech stuff that her mother had never understood and that even Oliver failed to understand. He had been the one who had made her love computers and everything around them. Without him she had never chosen to go to MIT, and hence without him she would have never worked at Queen Consolidated, never gotten to known Oliver, never joined Team Arrow, never fallen in love with the hero and never started the family she had now.

He had hurt her, though. He had hurt her badly, and Felicity wasn’t sure if she could take more pain like that. She had needed years until she had been able to trust a man enough with her heart to let him in all the way and let him be the father to her children without fearing that he would break them like her father had broken her. The fear of letting her father back into her life and being disappointed again was too huge to just give in.

“Felicity, I want to be back in your life,” her father stated with firm voice. “I want to really get to know you and your family. I want us to be great at making this city a better place for you and your family, my grandchildren. I want to be a better grandfather than father. I know that do get a chance for that it will require earning your trust back. I hope this is a first step down that very long road.”

Felicity just kept looking at him, not saying a word. He wanted to get to know _her_ and _her_ family. He wanted to work with _her_ to make this city a better place for _her_ family. It all sounded too good to be true.

“I hope you know that if I should agree on giving you a second chance, we will be moving in baby steps,” Felicity told him. “I might give you a second chance if everything you said is true, but that doesn’t mean that you get to know my kids anytime soon. I am going to protect them at any cost.”

“Knowing your mother and assuming that you take after her as a mother bear, I wasn’t expecting anything else,” Noah replied with a nod. “I will give you some time to verify what I told you. You call when you decided what to do next?”

Felicity nodded slowly, and Noah quickly gulped down the rest of his coffee. When he got up, he put on his coat and smiled at her.

“I am very glad that there is a chance that we have some future together,” he told her. “I will be patient about this, but I want you to know that I am already looking forward to the day when I might be able to meet your family. Except for her blonde hair Emmeline looks just the way you did when you were her age, and Thomas is the sweetest little boy I have ever seen. I would love to be a part of their lives one day, but I don’t expect it.”

Again Felicity only nodded slowly once more. She didn’t know what to say about this, and she actually felt like she shouldn’t say anything until she had verified what he had told her. After that she could still decide on how to continue and what to say to him.

He put a few dollars to the table before he said, “Bye, Felicity.”

“Bye,” Felicity mumbled.

She watched him going to the door and leaving the café. Felicity still had trouble processing all of this. If her father really should have been arrested because he had hacked for some good purpose, then she had grown up with a completely wrong idea of who he was. If what he had said was true, then they were a lot more similar than she had thought they were. She was doing the same thing, right? She was using her skills to do good like she had done since she had joined in on Oliver’s mission.

Tearing her eyes away from the door, she pulled her phone out of her purse and called the first number on speed dial. The first dialing sound had barely started when the call was taken.

“Hey, how did it go?”

Felicity frowned slightly. “Were you waiting next to your phone?”

“Admittedly, yes,” Oliver replied honestly. “Are you okay?”

“I think I am, yes.”

“So what did he say?”

“That he isn’t the bad man I probably think he is and that he is actually doing good by using his hacker skills to help people,” Felicity answered.

“Do you believe him?”

“Not yet.”

“And now?”

“He gave me some data that is supposed to verify his story,” Felicity told him. “I am going to work through that and do some more research on my own to find out if he is saying the truth.”

“That sounds like a good plan to me,” Oliver replied. “Does he know that you are doing good?”

“He thinks I am doing good by using the Queen Family Foundation.”

“Well, you are,” Oliver said, “but we both know that is not all.”

“Right, but apparently he doesn’t know. I guess I am a lot better at what I am doing than I thought I was.”

“You really are amazing.”

Felicity smiled, sighing. “Thanks. It’s going to take a little longer until I come back home now, though. I want to work through the files here. It’s less distracting.”

“Sure,” Oliver replied immediately. “Take your time. I am here when you need me.”

“I know. Thank you.”

“Sure. See you later.”

“Yes, see you later. Bye.”

 

 

Leaning in the door between the bedroom and the dressing room, Oliver watched Felicity with his arms crossed in front of his chest. Watching her putting on her tights was one of his favorite things to do. It made him focus on her strong legs and the beautiful curve of her ass. Only when she put on the dress and had trouble zipping the dress, he stepped forward.

He gently pushed her hands out of the way and slowly zipped the dress. His hands moved from her neck to her shoulders and over her chest until his arms were resting around her shoulders from behind. He pulled her back against him, so her back was pressed to his chest. Felicity sighed lowly, dropping her head back against his shoulder with a sigh.

“Are you sure you want to do that?” Oliver asked.

Felicity chuckled, putting her hands to his forearm and snuggling her cheek to his bicep. “You asked me this several times in the last days, and my answer hasn’t changed.”

Oliver kissed her shoulder. He knew she had gone through every file her father had given her and done some additional research to make sure she wasn’t overlooking anything. The result had been that everything looked perfectly fine. It had verified everything her father had said. Yet Oliver had trouble believing. He trusted Felicity and her skills, but he didn’t trust her father. He knew he was biased because of what Noah had done to Felicity when she had been a child, but he couldn’t get rid of the feeling that something was off.

Why had Noah come now? Now that Queen Industries was more successful than ever? There had been news about how the project with Wayne Enterprise was showing first really good results that would be presented at some tech fair soon. And with Felicity’s pregnancy now seemed to be the perfect timing to come back into her life and emotionally manipulate her into…

Oliver shook his head, kissing Felicity’s shoulder once more, and then let go of her. He had spent too much time thinking like a villain. Felicity was smart, the smartest person he knew, and she wasn’t incautious. She had thought about what risks there were, and she had decided to meet with her dad again anyway, so Oliver should trust her judgment like he had always trusted her judgment.

When he loosened himself out of the hug, Felicity turned around to him. She cocked her head, eying him up.

“You are still not happy that I’m seeing him again, right?”

Oliver sighed, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “It’s your decision, and I support that.”

Felicity pursed her lips. “Yet you don’t like it.”

“I-“ Oliver started, but didn’t know what to say to that. He shrugged his shoulders.

“You don’t trust that I know what’s good for me?”

“It’s not that,” Oliver replied immediately. He put his hands to her hips and pulled her towards him, until the bump pressed against his stomach. He could feel their baby kicking against his abs firmly, and he smiled at the feeling. “Felicity, I trust you. It’s him I don’t trust.”

Felicity sighed. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed his lips gently. Oliver leaned forward, intending to deepen the kiss and hold onto her for a little moment longer, but Felicity already lowered herself back onto her heels. She put her arms around his neck and smiled.

“I am careful, I promise,” she said. “I just… This is my chance to really get to know him. In the time he has been around, he was a good dad. Maybe the kids get the chance to have him as a granddad. So far they only have my mom and Quentin. They have been robbed of your parents already. Maybe they have the chance to get at least my dad back. We love growing family. I am the living proof for it.”

Felicity rubbed her hand over the baby bump, and Oliver sighed. He didn’t know. He had a bad feeling about this. That man had hurt Felicity way too much to be forgiven. He didn’t want her to get hurt again, and he didn’t want a man like that near their children.

“I don’t know if he deserves a second chance.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow, her hands sliding from his shoulders. She took a step back, snorting slightly. “Really? You of all people complain that I am giving someone another chance? How many chances exactly did I give you?”

Oliver frowned slightly, watching Felicity. She was avoiding his gaze, turning away from him and looking at herself in the mirror with an angry glare in her eyes. She tugged at her dress, adjusting it a little.

He knew that Felicity had given him a lot of chance. Actually, a lot of people had given him a lot of chances. The situation with her father was different, though, wasn’t it? He had left and hadn’t looked back for twenty years. Oliver had made mistakes, bad mistakes, when it came to Felicity. He didn’t even want to deny that, but he wasn’t sure if it could really be compared.

“I-“

When the doorbell rang, Felicity only shot him a short look over her shoulder. “Can you open? I’ll be downstairs as soon as I am fully dressed.”

Oliver nodded. He looked at her for a moment longer, considering saying something more, but he decided against it. He turned around on his heels and walked down the hallway. He closed the door to Emmeline’s nursery where the kids were playing together, not wanting them to get downstairs when they heard Felicity talking to her father. They hadn’t told the kids about their grandfather’s return yet, just like they hadn’t told Donna or anyone else yet. The only one who knew was William, but he had promised not to say anything to anyone. Well, he might tell his mom, but since she didn’t have contact with any of their friends or family, Oliver and Felicity didn’t bother.

When he reached the door, Oliver took in a deep breath, putting on a polite smile before he opened up. Felicity’s father didn’t look like what he had imagined at all. Oliver couldn’t actually describe what he had imagined Felicity’s father to look like, but he just had a feeling that it was different from the sight he was met with. The tall man with grey hair looked friendly, almost like a guy Oliver could grow to like if he didn’t know what mistakes he had made in his past.

“Oliver, right?” Noah asked and held out his hand. “I’m Noah Kuttler. It’s very nice to meet you.”

Oliver looked at the hand Noah was holding out to him for a moment. When he shook the hand, he deliberately used way too much force. If it hurt Noah, he didn’t let it show. He kept his eyes locked on Oliver’s, a small smile playing on his thin lips. Well, now he finally had a face to think of whenever his hate for the man that had broken his wife when she had been a kid would be on his mind.

“I wish I could say the same about you,” Oliver replied seriously, “but I wait with that judgment until later.”

Noah nodded. “I understand and accept that. Anything more to say?”

“A lot of things,” Oliver replied. He pulled back his hand and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “For now I will go with only one thing, though.”

“And that is?”

“I love Felicity more than anything or anyone. You might have been too weak to put your family above everything else, but trust me when I tell you that I am not. For me my family will always come first. It comes before anyone else, including me. If you hurt Felicity, I will break your neck, no matter the consequences.”

Noah held Oliver’s gaze, not even blinking. He nodded, though. “Understood.”

Oliver doubted that his father-in-law or whatever to call him really understood how serious Oliver was about this. Noah didn’t know him and didn’t know what person Oliver was. According to Felicity her father hadn’t found any connection between their family and the local vigilantes. If Noah hurt Felicity, he would get to know the darker sides of Oliver, though.

“Dad, hi.”

“Felicity,” Noah replied while Oliver was turning around seeing Felicity hurrying down the stairs. “It’s great seeing you again so soon.”

“Well, I checked the files you gave to me and dug into it a little more, and it confirmed what you told me,” Felicity explained.

Noah nodded. “Like I said, I made mistakes, but I am here now, and I want to make up for them.”

“We will see how that will go,” Felicity replied, and Oliver didn’t miss the slight tension in her voice.

“I already know what is expecting me when I fail, so…”

Noah gave Oliver a long look, leaving no doubt who had informed him about what would happen in case of failure. Felicity followed her father’s gaze to Oliver, but he didn’t look at her. His eyes stayed on Noah’s face stubbornly.

“So are we going to head out to grab some coffee? Or milk in your case?” Noah asked Felicity.

“No, I want to show you where I work,” Felicity replied with a quick smile. She glanced at Oliver before looking back at her father. “Could you wait in front of the garage? I’ll follow in a minute.”

“Yes, of course,” Noah replied. “It was nice to meet you, Oliver.”

Oliver only grumbled in response, watching Noah walk towards the garage. Once the man he had only met today but hated for years was far enough away, Oliver turned around to Felicity, lifting his hands defensively.

“Look, I know you probably don’t agree with me threatening him, but-“

Felicity laced her fingers through his and kissed him gently, interrupting his apology. It took Oliver the beat of a second to get over his surprise. He then leaned down and responded to the kiss. When Felicity lowered herself back onto her heels, she was smiling.

“I didn’t really expect this,” Oliver admitted.

Felicity chuckled, squeezing his hands. “You are right. I don’t agree with you threatening him, but I understand why you did it. It’s sweet that you want to protect me, but there is no reason for that. I am a big girl, and I can take care of myself.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, seeing nothing but honesty in her eyes. She didn’t seem angry or anything, so Oliver nodded with a sigh, rubbing his hands over the baby bump between them.

“You are right,” he replied. “Have a great day and call me later, okay?”

“Yes, of course.”

Oliver pecked Felicity’s lips before he leaned down to the bump and pressed a kiss to the top of it. With his lips against Felicity’s dress, he whispered to their baby, “Take good care of mommy, okay?”

“You pick me up later for the last Christmas shopping?” Felicity asked.

Oliver nodded. “Yes. We talk about the time when you call me later, okay?”

Felicity nodded. “Sounds good. Bye.”

“Bye, hon.”

Felicity squeezed his hands once more before she turned around, took her purse and headed to the garage. Oliver leaned into the frame of the door, watching Felicity.

He still didn’t have the best feeling about this, but Felicity was right. She was a big girl and she could take care of herself. If she needed him, he was going to be there to catch her. For now all he could do was stand back and wait what happened.

“Daddy?” Emmy called from the stairs.

Oliver turned around, smiling at his daughter. “What’s up, sweetie?”

“Can we wrap mommy’s presents now?”

Oliver chuckled. Like so many other things Emmy shared his absolute love for Christmas. After they had celebrated Hanukah earlier that month, there were now only three days left until Christmas Eve. The kids were just as excited as he was. Oliver glanced outside once more before he turned to Emmy completely and nodded.

“Yes, come on, time to wrap mommy’s presents.”

“Are you going to wrap yourself too, daddy?” Emmy asked with a big smile.

Oliver chuckled. Well, wrapping herself like a present was more Felicity’s style for their intimate Christmas party when the kids were in bed, and it was always a pleasure to unwrap her.

 

 

“This facility is really amazing.”

Felicity smiled proudly. “We had to upgrade on several levels in the last years. We started a cyber security project with Wayne Enterprise last year, and we are preparing a plan for a new project with LexCorps in the next year.”

“Wayne Enterprise and LexCorps,” Noah replied with acknowledgement in his voice. “Those are two of the very big fishes in the world of technological inventions.”

“They are.”

“And you land the two.”

“Well, I had help,” Felicity replied honestly. “Curtis Holt is a more than promising employee. I doubt I would have managed to land the deal with Wayne Enterprise if it wasn’t for him.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, Felicity,” Noah told her. “I am sure this company wouldn’t be what it is today if it wasn’t for you.”

Felicity felt herself blushing at the way her father looked at her and quickly looked away. She lowered her gaze to her feet before trying to distract herself by looking around the room. She had showed her father the entire company, from her office to the conference room down to Curtis’ lab. Well, actually it was her lab, but Curtis used it whenever she was forced to stay behind her desk because he was the only one she trusted to build what she had planned and improve her plans, so the result worked even better at the end.

She was kind of relieved that she had the chance to show her father what she had achieved. She knew that they still had to talk things out about why he had left, but Felicity felt like now was not the time for that yet. For now she wanted to see if there was a chance to really start over again. Only then she would sit her father down and talk to him about how she had felt after he had left. She didn’t want to threaten the chance they had here by chasing him away before they could really begin.

“Your husband?” Noah asked when Felicity’s phone vibrated in her hand.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Probably. He usually calls a few times a day.”

“He sounds like a good man.”

“He is,” Felicity replied honestly. “He is the best I could have asked for.”

“I am very happy you found him then.”

“Thanks.” Felicity smiled for a moment before she took in a deep breath. “I fear I need to go back to work now. There is still a lot of paper work waiting for me before I can take some time off for the holidays.”

“Oh, you are celebrating Christmas now?”

“With family and friends, yes,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “Oliver, the kids and I celebrated Hanukah at the beginning of the month, so now it’s time for Christmas.”

“Sounds like a busy time.”

“It is,” Felicity said with a chuckle, “but it is also very nice.”

Noah nodded, smiling at her for a moment longer. “I will leave you alone then.”

“Thanks.”

“Will you call me for another meeting?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, of course. Bye.”

“Bye,” Noah replied. “And once again, thanks for giving me this chance.”

“Baby steps,” Felicity reminded him quietly.

“Baby steps,” Noah confirmed with one short nod of his head before he turned around and left.

Felicity watched him disappearing in the elevator, sucking in a deep breath. So far everything was going smoothly with him. They still had the same interests, and they still had some kind of connection to each other. Obviously something like that didn’t get lost even when you hadn’t seen each other for twenty years.

She lifted her phone, looking at the message she had received and released the breath she had been holding with a low sigh.

_Unauthorized access to data was blocked. Pseudo files were transferred._

She shouldn’t be surprised. She really shouldn’t. She had doubled down the server security in the entire building in the last days, making sure there would be no way even the most talented person wouldn’t be able to easily hack themselves into the system without her knowing. She had told herself that she had only wanted to be careful and taken that step because it had been time. She had told herself that the timing had had nothing to do with her father, but the truth was spitting right in her face with that automatically set text message from the security server.

Someone had tried to get access to the data, and she was sure that when she was going through the report for that hacker attack it would be some really expensive and advanced little technology that had tried to steal the data. Now, of course it could be a coincidence that this had happened while she had been in here with her father, but Felicity didn’t believe in that. Maybe she had been stupid enough to give him a chance, but she wasn’t stupid enough to ignore the truth when it was yelling in her face like this.

Her father had betrayed her, and he had come here because he had wanted to steal from Queen Industries. He had pretended to be a hero and to want a relationship with her and her kids because he had known that that was how he could sneak into her life.

Felicity should have known better, but she hadn’t.

“Stupid me.”


	175. Let down

When Felicity’s phone rang, she only glanced at the display before rejecting the call and pushing her phone farther away from her. Not stopping to chop the tomatoes for the salad, Oliver watched Felicity’s face. She was taking in a slightly stuttering breath, focusing on the carrots she was chopping.

He could see in her face that something was off like he had seen in the last two days that something wasn’t okay. He had thought she would eventually open up to him about it, but so far that hadn’t happened. Oliver knew that sometimes she needed time before she could share something with him. He understood and respected that because often he felt the exact same way. Felicity always gave him time to think things through himself before telling her, and he had done the same for her.

It was the morning of Christmas Eve, though, and he had sworn himself that they would enjoy every Christmas as best as they could. Emmy’s first Christmas had been ruined when Oliver hadn’t taken kindly to Emmy saying ‘dada’ to every man she had seen, especially when one of those men had turned out to be Ray. During her second Christmas, the depression had made it impossible for Felicity to even talk to him. After that Oliver had sworn himself that every holiday, especially Christmas and Hanukah, was going to enjoyed. Neither of them was going to enjoy it if Felicity was burdened with something she refused to talk about to him, though.

Even if it wasn’t Christmas, Oliver felt like she needed to talk to him now. She needed to get it off her chest, and he was more than willing to hear what bothered him. He didn’t want her to suffer. He needed her to know that he was here for her no matter what and that she could lean on him with whatever was going on. They had seen how badly things ended when she wasn’t able to lean on him like it had been with her depression. They both had been only more miserable because they had felt like they were growing apart. Now of course the depression had been a lot more serious than this, but Oliver didn’t want to risk that Felicity was bottling up her feelings and accidentally further another depression.

Oliver put away the knife, turning around to Felicity. She pretended to not notice that he was looking at her and just continued to chop the carrots.

These last days she had pretended to be normal, but Oliver had looked through it. When you were married to someone for several years and knew that person in your bones, it was hard to miss something like that. Yes, Felicity had tried to cover whatever was bothering her by being as normal as possible, but her eyes had given her away. There was a sadness there that didn’t belong there and that hadn’t been there before she had showed Queen Industries to her father. Felicity had said that everything had gone well with him, but Oliver doubted it. Her eyes gave the truth away.

“Felicity.”

The knife in her hand stilled in the air for a second before she continued chopping. She didn’t look at him, and she didn’t say anything. She kept her eyes on the knife and the vegetable she was cutting stoically.

Oliver took a step forwards until he was standing at her side. He took the knife from her hand and put it to the chopping board. With his hands at her hips he turned her around to him without pulling her closer. He knew she needed her distance, and he was giving her as much as he could accept. He even pulled his hands back from her hips, only shortly brushing his fingertips against her bump.

“Talk to me,” he just said quietly.

Felicity looked at him for a moment, not saying a word and not moving. When she took in a deep breath then, tears sprang to her eyes. Oliver felt his heart breaking for her. He reached out his arms and pulled her against his chest, but Felicity quickly pushed him away and stepped out of his arms, bringing some distance between them. Oliver didn’t force her to stay in his arms. He even took a step back, making sure she knew that he was giving her the space she wanted and needed.

“He fooled me, okay?” Felicity asked.

She took in a deep, sniffling breath. Turning her face away from him for a moment, she wiped the tear that was rolling down her cheek away. She took in another deep breath, looking at the ceiling, and breathed out through her lips. Oliver waited patiently, just watching her.

Felicity then looked back at him, continuing, “I showed him Queen Industries. We were in the lab, talking about the latest successes of the company, and… I set up a new security program for the server at the beginning of the week. Curtis and I worked it out together in response to the newest IR burst receivers that suck the data out of any room. I set up an automatic messenger, so when the server noticed that someone tried to get unauthorized access, I was informed. I received the message when we were still in the lab. I was hoping it would be something else, but…”

She shrugged her shoulders, taking in another deep breath. Shaking her head, she looked away and to the floor.

“You set up a trap for him?” Oliver asked.

Felicity chuckled sadly, looking at him through tears in her eyes. “No because that would have required that I would have been able to trust my brain instead of letting my wishful thinking lead what I am doing.”

“But you increased security,” Oliver said quietly, “and you did so right before you invited him. I doubt it was a coincidence and-“

“It was!” Felicity yelled. “It was a coincidence because I didn’t think he was going to fool me! I thought he actually wanted a relationship with me and that he was interested in me and my life and not in what results of my work he could sell or misuse to commit more crimes or God knows what else he was planning to do with the data!”

Felicity sucked in a deep breath. Oliver stayed where he was, pressing his lips together and watching her. He wanted to hug her even more than before, but he was sure that she wouldn’t allow it. She hadn’t said everything she needed to say yet.

“I should have been smarter,” she said more quietly now, “but, no, I needed to believe that people can change and that he has changed and that he wanted me and…”

She just shook her head, chuckling dryly once more.

“I know I said-“

“You know what? I am not interested to hear you say I told you so,” Felicity interrupted him.

He wanted to tell her that he would never say something like that in a situation like this like she had told him the same thing when he had had terrible flashbacks after she had tied him to bed for sex at his request a few weeks ago. Before he got the chance to do so, though, she had already taken her phone and was turning around and leaving. Oliver frowned and followed her after a few seconds, but he had not even reached the kitchen door yet when he already heard the front door falling shut.

Oliver sighed quietly, realizing Felicity had left.

He couldn’t imagine what she felt like. She had suffered because of her father’s sudden leaving for so long. It had taken her a long time to put herself together and see that it hadn’t been her fault. Sometimes she still suffered from the memories and from the fear that everyone who loved her was going to leave her. It had been awhile since she had felt like that about him the last time, but Oliver still remembered clearly. It was something that was impossible to forget.

Of course she had hoped that her father was serious about wanting a relationship with her. He would never hold her hope against her. How many times had he hoped for something that hadn’t worked out? Hope was a powerful thing. I could take you so high before it just let you down. He was more than unhappy with the fact that this seemed to have happened to Felicity. If she had been let down, though, he was there to catch her. He would always be there to catch her.

When Tommy came running into the kitchen, Oliver quickly smiled at him.

“Hi, buddy. Everything alright?”

“Where is mama?”

“Mommy needed to leave once more.”

“Leave?”

“Yes, mommy’s not here right now.”

“When she back?”

Oliver sighed, rubbing his hand over his son’s back soothingly. “I am not sure. I think mommy needs… Mommy needs to be alone. She can’t come home right now because mommy is sad.”

“Sad?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“And now?”

“Now we need to make sure that everything is set for Christmas. That way we have time to comfort mommy when she comes home, right?”

Tommy nodded. “Right!”

“Can you wash the salad?” Oliver asked.

“No!” Tommy called out with laughter and dropped his head to his dad’s shoulder.

“No?” Oliver asked, tickling his son slightly. “Should we ask Emmy if she helps you?”

“Yes!”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s a difficult task. It’s good you two will do this together. Does daddy get a kiss?”

Without any hesitation Tommy put his hands to his dad’s cheeks and kissed him.

“Thanks,” Oliver said. “Will you get Emmy downstairs?”

Tommy nodded, and Oliver quickly set him down on the floor. He watched Tommy running out of the kitchen to get his sister for a moment before he turned around to the kitchen counter. He grabbed his phone and turned up the volume of his ringtone. He didn’t want to miss if Felicity called. He hoped she would call.

 

 

When Felicity heard the _pling!_ of the elevator, telling her that her first guest had arrived, she stopped walking up and down in her office and sat down at the edge of her desk instead. Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she took in a deep breath and told herself to stay calm like she had always thought she should be in a situation like this.

After she had left her home, kind of ditching Oliver without talking things out to him, she had just walked around for a little bit. She had needed to clear her head from all the emotions – fear, disappointment, shame, anger and sadness. That way she had been able to decide on what she had to do now. She had made two phone calls and headed to Queen Industries where she had waited.

“Felicity, hi,” her father said when he stepped into her office. “I was surprised you called. Shouldn’t you be home, preparing things for the holidays?”

“Yes, I should,” Felicity replied with tense voice. “I only asked you here because I wanted to say goodbye.”

“Goodbye?” Noah asked, frowning slightly. “We’re just starting to get to know each other.”

“I think I know everything I need to know,” Felicity told him. Ignoring her father’s questioning gaze, Felicity got up and walked past him towards the door.

“Felicity’s what is going on? I thought we were making progress.”

She was almost at the door when she turned around to her father. Telling him goodbye was the reason she had called him. Her goodbye was more than just saying ‘goodbye’, though. It included everything she should have said since they had met again already.

“When I was a girl, I hated myself. I thought I was broken, that no one could or ever would love me. It’s the only way a child can grow up when their father abandons them,” she told him with calm voice though it didn’t miss the anger that was boiling in the pit of her stomach.

“Felicity-“

“All I ever wanted to know was why. What was so wrong with me that you would leave?”

It was the question she should have asked from the start. It was the one question that she had needed to be answered all those years. Why had he left? Why hadn’t he taken her with him? Why hadn’t he tried to take responsibility? He had thrown away his relationship with her completely instead of trying to find a way for them to still be together in a way.

“There was nothing wrong with you, sweetheart. There was everything wrong with me. The police, the FBI, they were never going to stop looking for me. I realized a life on the run, that wasn’t the life that I owed you or your mother, so I disappeared.”

“You thought you were doing the right thing for us,” Felicity stated.

It wasn’t the first time someone was telling her that her life was safer without them. She was sure she had heard every possible way to put that by now.

Noah nodded. “Exactly.”

Felicity shook her head. “I have waited my entire life for that explanation. I don’t even know if I can believe it.”

“It’s the truth,” Noah promised.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, chuckling sadly. “I don’t care, I really don’t. If I have learned anything in the last years since I became a mom, it’s that I would never leave my children. For me there is nothing more important than my kids and their wellbeing. I would take prison and whatever other painful things the world has to offer over leaving my children at anytimes. There is nothing that could keep me from letting them, even for the break of a second, believe that they aren’t enough for me. My children are now and will always be my priority, and there is nothing I wouldn’t do or wouldn’t endure to make them know how much I love them. And I am lucky enough to be able to say that I have a husband who is just like that too. He would never leave us. He would never make us think that we weren’t enough for him. He loves his children and me more than his own life.”

Even a few days ago she had wanted her father to know everything about him, so he would be proud of her. She had turned back into the little girl that had needed him to be proud of her. She wasn’t that girl anymore, though, and she hadn’t been in a long time. She was a grown-up woman now, who had achieved a lot and who had men in her life that she trusted and that showed her how husbands and fathers were supposed to be. The reason she wanted her father to know something about her know, wanted him to know that she had a happy family life and didn’t need his appreciation any longer was because she was proud of herself. She was proud of what she had achieved in her job and what family she had built. That was what she wanted to him to know. No matter how much he had hurt her, she was stronger than that.

She heard another _pling!_ of the elevator and continued, “Like I said, it doesn’t matter to me if you wanted to protect mom and me or not. There is only one part of your story that I know to be true, and that is that you are a wanted by the police.”

Noah looked slightly past her where Felicity knew Quentin and two officers were coming into her office. Her father turned his eyes back to her, confusion and disbelief in his eyes. “Felicity-“

“I just need you to know one thing,” Felicity said while the two officers were approaching her father. “You are wrong. I am nothing like you.”

“Felicity-“

Before her father could say anything more, Quentin put him into handcuffs, starting to inform him about his rights. “Noah Kuttler, you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right…”

“Felicity, no,” Noah said.

Felicity watched him, not taking his eyes off him even when the two officers led him outside after Quentin had informed him about his rights. As soon as he had disappeared from her sight, Felicity walked back to her desk. She sat down on the chair behind it with a deep sigh, rubbing her hand about her bump. She could feel the baby kicking firmly, probably in reaction to her quickened heartbeat.

“Everything’s alright now, baby,” she promised. “From now on no more excitement like this until after you are born. You are safe where you are now. I promise.”

She closed her eyes, breathing deeply for a few times. When she opened her eyes, she found Quentin’s worried gaze on her. He had been one of the few people who knew about her depression during the pregnancy with Tommy. After the symptoms had faded and not come back again, she and Oliver had decided not to tell anyone about it. Quentin had found out about it, though, and he had helped Oliver to get through it. He had even moved into their home after Tommy’s birth to support Felicity in the first weeks with the newborn baby. Of course he was worried now.

“I’m fine,” Felicity stated quietly, “at least mostly.”

Quentin nodded slowly. “It’s okay if you’re not, though.”

Felicity smiled through some tears. Maybe she wasn’t fine, but she would know how to deal with that. She had an amazing man at home who understood a lot about pain and disappointment. He would hug her tightly, giving her a feeling of home like nobody else could. And he would say all the things she didn’t know she needed to hear yet.

“Thank you for helping with this,” Felicity said.

“Sure,” Quentin replied. “I will follow them to the precinct in a few minutes and interrogate him, just so I can rub the fact that I am with Donna in his face.”

Felicity smiled a little forcedly. “Sounds like a good plan.”

“I guess your mother doesn’t know that he contacted you yet?”

“I will tell her,” Felicity promised, “after the holidays.”

Quentin nodded. “Alright. We see you tomorrow I guess?”

“Yes, of course,” Felicity replied.

Since Samantha had decided to work during Christmas and take off a week around New Year, so she could go on vacation with William, the boy was spending Christmas in his father’s home. Therefore Oliver and Felicity were hosting their usual Christmas party unlike last year when the West Family had done so, so Oliver and Felicity had been able to spend some time with William in Central City.

“Can I leave you alone?” Quentin asked.

“Yes, of course,” Felicity responded. “I will just… sit here for another few minutes until I feel that my legs are not that wobbly anymore, so I can go downstairs and get a taxi.”

“I can take you home.”

Felicity shook her head with a low sigh. “No, you have really done enough for today, thanks. Go and tell my father what great man my mom is with now, and then get home to her to celebrate Christmas.”

“I am sure she already burned the dinner,” Quentin mumbled before he nodded. “Alright. If you need anything more, call me.”

“I don’t think it will be necessary,” Felicity told him, “but I will call if I change my mind.”

“Merry Christmas, Felicity.”

“Merry Christmas, Quentin,” Felicity replied in a whisper.

She waited until she heard the _pling!_ of the elevator that told her that Quentin was on his way downstairs to the lobby. Only then did she rest her forehead on the cold glass of the desk and allow the tears in her eyes to fall.

 

 

“Mama home yet?” Tommy asked with a sigh.

The young boy looked up from the cartoon Oliver had switched on for the kids, so he had been able to finish the last preparations for their dinner today and William could study upstairs without being disturbed. When he looked into his son’s big, blue eyes now, he saw longing. He missed his mother though she had only been away for a couple of hours, but that was Tommy. He always missed his mommy when she wasn’t around.

Sighing, Oliver rested his forearms on the back of the couch and answered, “No, not yet.”

“When’s she coming?”

“I don’t know,” Oliver replied, “but hopefully soon.”

Tommy sighed once more. “We comfort mama?”

Oliver nodded, stroking a hand over his son’s dark hair. “When she is coming home, we will all comfort her, yes.”

“Why?” Emmy asked, now looking up from the cartoon too. “Is mommy sad?”

“Yes, she is,” Oliver told her. “Mommy was… She trusted someone who used that trust to hurt her. Now mommy is really sad because she thought that person loved her, but he didn’t. At least he didn’t love her in the way she would deserve, and that hurt her.”

Emmy gasped. “Mommy’s hurt?”

“Not physically,” Oliver replied quickly. “She is not bleeding or anything, but her heart hurts.”

“Heart hurts?” Tommy asked, putting his hand to his chest right over his heart.

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“You should put an arrow in him, daddy,” Emmy said, an almost mischievous glint in her eyes. “Nobody hurts mommy.”

Oliver couldn’t deny that the thought was tempting. He would love to put an arrow in Noah Kuttler and end his existence in this world, so he couldn’t do any more damage to Felicity. He doubted that Felicity would agree to this, and he would never do anything that would add to her pain.

“What mommy needs now is comfort, and that is what we will give to her when she is back, okay?” he asked the kids.

“Hugs and kisses?” Tommy asked.

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed and kissed first the crown of Tommy’s and then the top of Emmy’s head. “And what do you think? Whose kisses does mommy love the most?”

“Daddy’s!” Emmy called out.

In the same moment Tommy said, “Tommy’s.”

Oliver chuckled. He was about to answer something when he heard the front door being unlocked. He knew that he needed at least a moment alone with Felicity, and he was almost sure that it was what she needed that too. It was hard to break and show all the pain one was feeling around the kids. Sure, they let their children see them sad because that was life, but if Felicity wanted to mourn the lost chance of starting a relationship with her dad, than she would need a moment with just him. She needed a moment where she could just be herself.

He quickly told the kids that the washing machine was calling for him and left them alone in the living room. He closed the door behind him, making sure they wouldn’t hear when he talked to Felicity. He walked towards the front door and felt his heart breaking a little more for her when he found her.

She had her arms put around herself like she was holding herself together, keeping herself from falling apart. Her forehead rested against the door. He face was lowered, hidden between some strands of hair that had fallen out of her ponytail. Her eyes were screwed shut, but it didn’t keep the tears from running down her cheeks. Her body was shaking with almost inaudible yet all too violent sobs.

Oliver didn’t hesitate. He knew Felicity. She might have pushed him away this morning when she had been angry, but she wouldn’t push him away now. What she needed now was a hug, so Oliver went over to her. Taking one of her hands, he turned her around and pulled her against his chest and into his arms in one fluent movement. Felicity didn’t fight it. She pressed herself close to him immediately, circling his waist with her arms and resting her head against his shoulder. Oliver put his arms around her shaking body, holding her to him. His lips pressed to her forehead gently.

“It’s okay,” he whispered. “It’s okay. You’re home. It’s okay. I’m here.”

He mumbled the soothing words into her ear, not sure she was even hearing them. It didn’t matter, though. He probably needed to say them more than she needed to hear them anyway, so he kept saying them nonetheless. Every now and then he brushed his lips against her skin, tightening his hold on her at the same time.

“I’m so sorry,” she sobbed against the side of his neck after awhile.

Oliver stroked a hand over her hair, shaking his head. “You have no reason to be.”

“What I said before-“

“No, no, no,” Oliver hurried to say. He put his hands to Felicity’s face, pushing her just enough away, so he could look her in the eyes. Their noses were bumping against each other’s so close he still held her to him. He wiped a tear that was running down her cheek away with his thumb and waited until she locked eyes with him before he explained, “We are far over the point where you need to apologize for something like that. You were angry at your father, not at me, but I was there, while he wasn’t. There is nothing to apologize for. Okay?”

When Felicity nodded, he brushed his lips against hers and pulled her back into his arms. Felicity pressed her nose against his skin and sucked in a deep breath, breathing him in. He always did the same thing when he woke up from a nightmare or was haunted by torturous memories. The scent of her skin always calmed him down, and he hoped she would feel the same way about the scent of his skin.

“Quentin arrested him,” she sobbed against his neck. “I called him and asked him to do so.”

“I’m sure you made the right choice,” Oliver whispered to her ear. “He betrayed you. He was a criminal. You made the right choice.”

Felicity clawed her hands into the back of his shirt, sobbing once more. Oliver kissed her temple. He rubbed his hands over her back soothingly, and Felicity snuggled herself as close to him as possible. He stayed quiet, waiting for her to say something, but Felicity stayed silent. Oliver just held her, noticing that her breathing slowly evened out, and her body stopped shaking.

Yet all Oliver did was holding her. He needed to feel the warmth of her body against his and assure himself that she was physically okay. He needed this when he himself felt lost as much as when he feared that she was feeling like that. He didn’t want her to feel lost because she wasn’t. In his arms was where she should never feel lost. Her past might have haunted her these last days, but that was over now. Her father was out of her life now.

“Should we go upstairs and talk about this?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shook her head. “Not yet. I just want to stay here for little while longer. I’m not ready to talk about it, I think.”

Oliver tightened his hold on her. “Yes, of course. We will stay here like this as long as you want us to.”

“Good because-“

“Mama!”

At the sound of their son’s voice they both turned around. Tommy came running towards them with his arms spread. He immediately wrapped his arms around his mother’s right leg and pressed his face against her hip.

“Hi, buddy,” Felicity said. Sniffling, she rested her head back against Oliver’s shoulder, stroking her hand over their son’s dark hair. “Are you okay?”

“Mama not be sad,” Tommy replied. He pulled back enough to reach out his arms for his mother to lift him into his arms.

Oliver was quicker, though. He knew with the growing bump and the slight backache Felicity had that she had problems lifting Tommy into her arms easily. That was why he picked up Tommy from the floor and held the boy in a way that allowed him to circle Felicity’s neck with her arms. Felicity took Tommy from Oliver after a moment, holding their son against her. Tommy kissed her lips, repeating his words. “Mama not be sad.”

“Mommy’s only a little bit sad,” Felicity said through more tears that sprang to her eyes.

Tommy put his hands to his mother’s face, drying her cheeks. Oliver watched Felicity closing her eyes and leaning into the boy’s touch. He put a hand to her hip, the other to Tommy’s back and hugged both of them tightly.

It wasn’t long until Emmy peeked out of the living room and then finally joined them. She leaned her head against Felicity’s bump, stroking her hand over Felicity’s back. “It’s okay, mommy. We comfort you.”

Felicity chuckled. She put a hand to Emmy’s hair, stroking her fingers over her daughter’s blonde, curly hair. Sighing, she rested her head back to Oliver’s shoulder, and the four of them enjoyed the quiet moment.

“We still need to talk,” Oliver whispered to Felicity.

She nodded. “I know, but not today.”

“Felicity-“

“Not during Christmas, Oliver. It is a holiday for families. My family is here with me, and I want to enjoy these days with him,” Felicity whispered. “I don’t want that to get ruined by a man who I thought was my family but isn’t, not really. So not during Christmas.”

“Okay, not during Christmas,” Oliver replied.

“After.”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, after.”


	176. In my arms

Oliver leaned into the door quietly, watching Felicity. She was standing at the window, staring outside with unseeing eyes. Her left arm was wrapped around herself tightly like she was holding herself together. Her hand was resting at the side of the bump, distantly stroking over it. Her right hand held a mug of ginger tea against her chest, but it didn’t help the slight trembling of her body, probably because it wasn’t cold. The shivering came from what burdened her inside.

To say that he was worried about it was probably an underestimation. Felicity had been like this all week. Since she had come back the afternoon of Christmas Eve, she had been slightly distant and engrossed in thoughts. They had talked about what had happened between her and her father, and Oliver understood that a betrayal and disappointment like that couldn’t just be forgotten, that the emotional wounds she had been left with needed time to heal, but he also knew how much worse it would get if Felicity kept bottling everything up.

A lot of what she had been doing these last days reminded him of something he didn’t hesitate to admit he was afraid of. Staring with unseeing eyes, wrapping her arms around her body to keep herself from falling apart, barely talking – it all remembered him of the prenatal depression. She had done all these things, and even if it had been a lot worse back then, he was still worried.

Felicity had pushed herself through the holidays, pretending everything was alright when their friends and family had been here. She had talked to her mother, telling her everything that had happened, and she had even had a long talk to William. The boy had felt terribly guilty for advising Felicity to meet with her dad and try to build a relationship with him. Felicity had told him that his advice hadn’t been the only reason why she had met her father. She had wanted to meet him, and none of William’s words could have convinced her to go see her father if she hadn’t wanted in the first place. She had been wonderful about reassuring him.

Yet Oliver almost wished she would have been a little less wonderful because he feared that she was bottling up her emotions. That way when they were exploding inside of her one day soon, it would only be worse.

Oliver glanced at his watch. Only fifteen more minutes separated them from the New Year. It was time to get rid of the past to look into the future, Oliver decided.

 

Felicity rubbed her hand over her bump, tracing the movements of the baby inside of her. The baby was moving a lot tonight like he or she had been moving a lot these last days in general. Felicity’s emotions clearly had an influence on the little human being growing inside of her. She had a doctor appointment next week for the next prenatal check-up. She had antedated the appointment after the drama with her father. She remembered that the doctor had mentioned that prenatal depression could have negative influence on the baby’s development.

She wasn’t depressive. This wasn’t a depression. She was just going through some emotional rough patch or whatever to call it and struggled with it. Meeting her father had been like seeing a ghost. Yet the thought that this stress might have hurt the baby worried her a little. She felt a shiver running through her body at the thought.

As if he had just waited for the right moment – he probably had, Felicity thought to herself – Oliver stepped right behind her. He put a blanket around her shoulders and circled her waist from behind. His hands came to rest on the baby bump. Felicity put her mug of tea away and put her hands to his to move his fingers to where she felt their baby kicking. With a low sigh that revealed how comfy she felt, she snuggled back to him. She leaned her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes.

She loved being in his arms. Oliver’s body was warm and fit perfectly against hers. After years of hugging and cuddling and keeping their bodies close they easily found the positions that made both of them feel the most comfortable and the warmest. She loved being embraced by him like this. In moments when she felt like she was falling apart, Oliver’s strong arms were the best way to keep her from doing so. Here was where she really felt home.

“Where are the kids?” she asked.

“They fell asleep, so it looks like it is only us when the years turn.”

“Sounds good to me,” Felicity replied, snuggling closer to Oliver.

“Yes, absolutely. You know, there are thirteen minutes left of this year, though,” Oliver whispered to her ear before he kissed the soft skin right under the lobe. “Maybe you should talk everything that burdens you off your chest now, so you can leave it in this year and look forward to the next.”

Felicity smiled slightly, keeping her eyes directed outside into the dark night. Oliver was right. She should get this off her chest now, so she could move on from it once and for all. She had carried the pain her father had caused her way too long. She wasn’t going to continue so.

“I feel so stupid,” she said with a low sigh, feeling new tears springing to her eyes.

Oliver tightened his hold on her and kissed her temple. “You are not stupid. You have proved over and over again that you are everything but.”

“I was stupid in this,” Felicity objected. “My entire life I knew that he was a bad guy. I hated him for leaving, but the moment he came back here I cast all reasonable doubts to the wind and let him back in. I should have known that he wasn’t interested in me. He didn’t even put enough effort into his researches to dig out the connection between me and the Arrow. He just took the first thing he thought that could link us together and used that on me. And he was right. I turned into the little girl that felt she needed his appreciation for everything she did. I don’t even know why I am surprised about how it ended because doesn’t every- Never mind.”

Felicity shook her head. She had wanted to be funny like she did so often when she was actually in pain, but she knew that she didn’t need to do so for Oliver. He accepted her the way she was. She could be herself around him, and she could tell him how she felt which she had done. She really felt stupid. She had believed to be a strong woman, but the moment her dad had showed up she had turned back into being a naïve, little girl.

“I still don’t think the fact that you improved the security system a few days before you showed him the company was a coincidence,” Oliver said quietly. “You had doubts and reacted to them even if maybe you couldn’t admit to yourself that that is the reason why you did it. There is a connection there. I am sure of it.”

Felicity shook her head. “You only think so because you always want to see the best in me.”

“That’s an easy thing to do,” Oliver replied.

He pressed his lips to her pulse point and Felicity sighed. She loved when he did that. She knew that he needed to feel her pulse against his lips when he was feeling miserable. Felicity needed to feel his lips against her pulse point when she felt like that. For her it was like he was reassuring her that he loved her as long as she would live and no matter what would happen.

“I know it’s over now,” Felicity said with a low sigh, “but I still wish I would have been smarter than just letting him back into my life. God, when I think about that I might have invited him into our home to meet the kids or anything.”

Felicity moved her hands up and down Oliver’s forearms slowly. She loved feeling the play of muscles under her touch. The sight of the goosebumps her touch elicited on his skin made her smile. It was always great seeing what effect her touch had on Oliver.

“I doubt that you would have ever let it come so far, no matter how hopeful you might have been,” Oliver explained.

After a short moment he put his hands to her hips to turn her around, so she was facing him. He wrapped his arms around her waist loosely, looking at her intently. Felicity felt her heart skipping a beat at the intense expression in his eyes. Oliver leaned forward and kissed her gently. His lips were soft against hers. They opened, so he could massage her tongue with his for a short moment. When he pulled back, their eyes locked again.

“That being said I think I should add that it kind of makes me happy that you had hope that your dad could have changed and that you gave him a second chance.”

“Why? So you I would have to say ‘You were right’?” Felicity asked teasingly, cocking her head. She knew that that wasn’t the reason because Oliver wasn’t like that. He loved hearing her say he was right when they were teasing each other, but not when something like this had happened.

“No,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, “though I wouldn’t mind if you said it.”

“I think I’ll take a pass.”

Oliver smiled and pecked her lips shortly before he explained seriously, “No, not because of that. The reason why that makes me happy is because it proves that you still have hope that people can change and people can be good.”

“Which is naïve.”

“No,” Oliver objected firmly. “It proves that all the darkness that we are faced with in our nighttime jobs and even during the days from time to time didn’t pull you in. You are still who you have always been. You are a strong woman who has gives people chances which is not something everyone can do. Some people don’t have the strength to do so and risk getting hurt again. You have that strength, and at the same time you are strong enough to decide when enough is enough. You don’t let yourself be fooled around again and again.”

Oliver put his hands to her cheeks, and Felicity snuggled her face into his touch. She felt the need to close her eyes and enjoy the warmth of his fingers against the skin of her face, but Oliver’s eyes were still focused on her intently. She didn’t want to break their eye contact.

“I don’t trust people easily, Felicity,” Oliver added, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. “I don’t have trust in the world because in the five years I have been away and the time since my return I have seen what dark and dangerous place it can be more than most other people will get to see in their entire life. Luckily, I should add. The thing is that the last thing I want is for my darkness to ever rub off on you. I want you to keep being hopeful and trustful. I want you to believe that people can change and that they deserve second chances. Sometimes I have trouble with that, but seeing you continuing to do what you have always done is amazing. I am not worried that I will miss teaching our children these things because they have a great mom who is able to do so. I don’t know if I am allowed to say something like that or if it sounds patriarchic, but I hope it’s okay when I tell you that I am very proud of you. I am proud that you are a hopeful person and I am proud that you are strong enough to give people second chances.”

Felicity felt a thousand butterflies fluttering in her stomach from the way Oliver looked at her. His eyes were intense. There was no doubt that he meant what he said. And, yes, maybe it was a little patriarchic if a man told a woman he was proud of her, but if it was coming from Oliver, it really wasn’t. If he was the one saying it, Felicity knew that he meant it just like that.

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered.

“I know that for you at least right now it must feel like you always get hurt by continuing to let people in,” Oliver continued with low voice, “but I want you to know that I hope it is worth it at least from time to time. You might have gotten hurt by letting your father back in, but… I mean I got more than one chance too and I am far from perfect, but I hope that… I hope that I was worth the risk of giving me another chance or, well, other chances.”

Felicity smiled at him. She put a hand to his chest and rubbed it over his heart, feeling the even beating of it under her touch.

“You’ve been more than worth it,” Felicity whispered back to him, “and I think you are as perfect as it is still human.”

Oliver smiled back at her and slowly leaned down. Felicity circled his waist with her arms and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to press herself more against him. Her tongue slipped into his mouth, and she moaned quietly at the feeling. Oliver still held her face in his like he had done when they had kissed the very first time. Felicity’s hands clawed into the fabric of his shirt, holding Oliver to her.

She remembered telling her father how she hadn’t believed that any man could ever love her. She felt the weight of those words still pressing down on her chest now because they had been even truer than she had been able to admit so far. She really hadn’t believed that any man ever could. Now she had wonderful men in her life who loved her – Roy, Quentin, John and first and foremost of course Oliver. They loved her unconditionally.

When a quiet sob escaped her, Oliver broke the kiss. He wiped away the tear that had fallen from her eyes with his thumb and just looked at her, waiting for her to say something. Felicity took in a deep breath.

“I still don’t understand why he left me, and why he came back only to betray me and- I mean rationally I know why he did this, but emotionally it is-“

She rolled her eyes about herself and leaned her face more into Oliver’s touch.

“You just need time,” Oliver whispered. “Closure doesn’t come easy, but I promise you that with time it will. You need to get over the shock and the disappointment first. Don’t worry. You will work through that. I am here for you.”

Felicity sighed, nodding her head as far as Oliver’s hands on her face allowed. “Okay.”

“And I know that you know this, but I am going to say it nonetheless,” Oliver said. “I love you, and I will never leave you or the kids. As long as I can decide about this, you are not losing me.”

Felicity looked at Oliver for a long moment. She knew that he always knew what to say to make her feel better, but she doubted that he knew how much she had needed to hear this. Yes, she knew that Oliver would never leave her, but the fact that he was saying it again now just proved it even more for her. He knew her pain, and he knew her fear. She was sure that Oliver wouldn’t break his promise unless someone or something very powerful kept him from doing so.

She saw in his eyes that Oliver was almost waiting for her to straighten back and kiss him, but Felicity didn’t do so. Instead she gently took his hands from her face and laced her fingers through his.

“You know, after everything we have been through during the pregnancy with Tommy, I really wanted this pregnancy to be perfectly happy,” Felicity told him honestly. “I thought we had been through enough and finally deserved some extraordinary happiness again. I mean we are happy with our life, but this pregnancy is something special, so I felt we deserved to be even happier than usually. So when my dad showed up, I kind of thought that this was part of the happiness I deserved. I thought the universe owed me one.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “I felt the same way about Helena.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. “Urgh.”

Oliver chuckled and squeezed her hands. “Yeah, I know. It took me some years until I realized I deserved a whole lot more. You know, someone blonder and smarter, preferably with glasses and a love of babbling.”

“Those are quite detailed ideas.”

“Let’s just say I was inspired by someone I have worked with for awhile,” Oliver told her and lifted her hands to his lips to kiss the knuckles.

“Well, luckily, it didn’t take me so long,” Felicity replied. “I already know what men I deserve in my life, and I think that is the way I should have seen meeting my father again.”

Oliver frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

“When he came here, I thought the universe owed me, so my immediate reaction was thinking that the universe owed me the chance to get to know my father,” Felicity explained. “I was wrong, though. What I should have realized by seeing him again is that, yes, the universe owed me one for putting me through so much in my childhood and maybe even later with the depression and god knows what else, but it owed me more than getting to know my father, who has no honest interest in me. It owed me a man who loved me unconditionally and who would give me the feeling of home and the feeling of safety. I deserve a man that lets me know that I deserve better than my father made me think and who teaches my children that nothing they could do would ever make him leave, a man who loves unconditionally. I have that man in my life and that is enough for me because he is all I really need.”

Oliver smiled at Felicity, and she felt her whole body starting to tingle at the way he looked at her. His thumbs were stroking over the back of her hands gently. Slowly Felicity felt the heavy weight that had rested on her shoulders for the last weeks lifting away from her. For the first time in more than a week she could finally really breathe again.

“I kind of feel like someone should announce us husband and wife now,” Oliver suddenly said.

Felicity laughed, putting her arms around his neck and pulling him into a tight hug.

“Thanks for being who you are,” she said, snuggling her cheek to his and enjoying the way his stubble lightly scratched her soft skin. “You are amazing.”

“I can give the same right back to you.”

Felicity pulled just far enough out of the hug, so she could press her lips to Oliver’s. They kissed slowly, saying powerful _I love you_ s without using any words. No words were needed right now. The love in that kiss was enough. They only pulled apart when they heard the first fireworks outside.

“Happy new year, Felicity,” Oliver whispered.

Felicity smiled. “Happy new year, Oliver.”

They kissed once more, only briefly this time. Oliver tightened his hold on Felicity and kissed the tip of her nose before he said, “Now after all this drama, I have some good news.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “That sounds promising. Shoot.”

“Well, I think Little Oliver is in best form again, so we can welcome New Year with a little more action if you are up to that. We can actually welcome New Year all night.”

“I thought I should quit calling him Little Oliver?”

“Since it comforts you, I could live with calling him that this one time. Just don’t do it too often or he gets sad and, you know, refuses to work again or something. That wouldn’t be helpful, would it?”

Chuckling slightly, Felicity moved her hands over his chest. Her eyes followed the movements of her hands. “I am really surprised I am saying this, but I think I am not in the mood.”

“Wow,” Oliver made, and Felicity dropped her head against his shoulder with a chuckle. “Wow! Really? Not in the mood? Not even a little bit?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Nope, not even a little bit.”

Oliver put a hand under her chin, stroking his thumb over her bottom lip and watching her intensely. “Does this have anything to do with your father?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders once more. “Maybe, but it doesn’t matter because he has no control over me. Right now all I want is staying in your arms and watching the fireworks with you.”

Oliver smiled and pecked her lips. “Your wish is my command.”

He started walking, forcing her to walk backwards. He gently kissed her lips once more before he put his hands to her hips and turned her around. Felicity was already looking at the fireworks when she leaned back against Oliver’s chest once more. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and Felicity snuggled her cheeks against Oliver’s bicep.

This was where she was supposed to be. This was where she belonged. Oliver wasn’t only giving her the feeling of home. He was her home. He was the one man she needed in her life, und luckily she knew that he wouldn’t let her down. He loved her just in the right way, in the way she needed and the way she deserved.


	177. Girls

“Am I wrong or have we been really late for all the shopping this pregnancy?” Felicity asked, sinking a little lower into the soft leather of the passenger seat. “I mean it’s only nine weeks until our baby is going to be born, and we just bought the furniture for the nursery.”

“We were busy with other stuff,” Oliver just replied, shrugging his shoulders while directing the car into their street. “There is nothing to worry, though. Nine weeks is still a lot of time, and since we could take the furniture with us already, I will just set it up in the next days. I swear to you that next weekend everything is ready, so the baby can come anytime.”

“Hey, don’t encourage the kid,” Felicity complained, boxing Oliver’s shoulder forcefully, but it only made him chuckle. She stroked her hand over her bump briefly. “Don’t listen to daddy, Baby. You will just stay in there until I will give my go, okay? Take your time. There is no rush.”

“I wasn’t encouraging her,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, “or him if you still don’t believe Emmy and me when we’re telling you it’s a girl.”

It wasn’t like she didn’t believe them, Felicity thought to herself. The truth was that she actually believed the same thing, but so far Felicity had stuck to her opinion that is was best to not admit that until she saw with her own eyes that they had another girl. She had thought that having another girl was going to make everything complicated because they usually had struggle finding a name for a baby girl. Felicity still believed that they would have trouble, but after what had happened with her dad she had-

“Hon?” Oliver asked, taking one of her hands. He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. He turned his eyes from the street, asking, “Is everything alright?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied quickly, putting her other hand to the back of Oliver’s. “I was just thinking about something.”

Oliver directed the car into their driveway and parked it in front of the garage. As soon as he had turned off the engine, he unbuckled his seat belt. Bending one leg onto the seat, he turned around to Felicity, facing her. His fingers were still holding onto her hand, squeezing gently.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

Felicity smiled. Since her father had shown up, Oliver was even more attentive than he usually was already. Her father’s unexpected appearance here had unsettled Felicity, and Oliver knew that. He would never miss something like that, and Felicity understood that he was worried because of that. After the depression during the pregnancy with Tommy the last thing Oliver wanted was for her to bottle up her emotions and fall back into depression.

Smiling, Felicity unbuckled her seat belt. She was still slightly surprised that she had managed to put it on in the first place. If she had felt fat when she had been pregnant with Emmy and Tommy, it was nothing compared to what she looked like now. She had no idea how the bump was supposed to grow even more in the next nine weeks. She already felt like she was close to exploding as it was. Anyway, Felicity put Oliver’s hand to the bump and rested her own on top of it. She felt the baby kicking against Oliver’s hand, and he smiled in response, enjoying the feeling.

“I actually believe the baby is a girl too,” Felicity told him with a smile.

“Wow,” Oliver said, chuckling slightly. “I thought you were going to deny it until you would hold her in your arms.”

Felicity shouldn’t be surprised because Oliver always managed to look right through her, but somehow she still managed to be surprised that he knew. She had thought that she had been quiet credible when she had said that she didn’t believe the baby was a girl. Oliver only chuckled at her face.

“You knew that I felt the same way?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I think after we have been married for so long, it is only natural to know such things about each other.”

“I guess it is natural at least for us,” Felicity replied.

Smiling at her, Oliver leaned his temple against the headrest of his seat and just looked at her for a long moment. “Why did you decide on telling me your secret suspicion now?”

“After what happened with my father I was thinking a lot about our children,” Felicity explained, “and like I told you already, I feel like we are doing a lot better job at letting them know their worth than my father did with me. Somehow that got me thinking about all the girls and women out there who are probably suffering from daddy issues, and I realized that maybe it would be nice to add one more girl to the world who wouldn’t have to worry about that and who knows how good dads are supposed to be. Does that make sense?”

Oliver smiled at her amorously. His thumb moved over her popped out belly button gently, making Felicity giggle quietly.

“It does make sense,” Oliver told her with a nod. “It won’t erase our struggles with finding a name for her, though.”

“It’s a little prize to pay, I guess,” Felicity replied. Her smile changed from loving to teasing before she put a hand high to his thigh and added, “Besides, I will just use Little Oliver against every name I don’t like.”

She watched Oliver clenching his jaws slightly. “We don’t call him that.”

“Hey, everything that makes me happy, right? I am happy if we keep calling him that. By the way, he deserves it. He let me down when I needed him the most.”

Oliver cocked his head, giving her a pointed look, and Felicity chuckled. Oliver pinched her playfully, reminding her, “He didn’t fail you last night. As far as I remember you were pleading him to stop because you couldn’t take his stamina anymore.”

Felicity felt heat coiling inside of her at the thought. After her father’s unpleasant visit her sex drive had decreased strongly. It wasn’t until last night that she had craved sex again. She wasn’t in sexual overdrive mode, but she surely wasn’t exactly rejecting sex anymore either. Actually, she felt like she was back to some healthy level of wanting sex where she loved having sex with her husband, but she didn’t feel like she needed to get laid several times each day to crave her pleasure even a little bit less. It felt good.

Licking her lips, Felicity glanced around. “Do you think pregnant sex in a car is possible?”

“Oh, I absolutely think so,” Oliver replied, “at least when a pregnant couple is as creative as we are.”

He leaned in and kissed her passionately. His lips moved against hers eagerly, opening them up and stroking his tongue inside of her mouth. Felicity felt her body reacting. Her heartbeat quickened and goosebumps elicited on her skin. She was about to climb into his lap when Oliver suddenly pulled away.

“That being said, we have absolutely no time for sex right now.”

Felicity groaned, knowing that he was right. They had promised Roy that it was only taking two hours at max, but of course Oliver had needed to make sure they really only bought the best for their baby. They had given the furniture and the strollers as well as some other things away when Emmy and Tommy had grown out of that. Oliver had said that with the money they had they could clearly afford doing something good and donating the things they didn’t need any longer and just buy new stuff when they needed them again after all, but Felicity believed that it was actually his love for stores for layette that had made him suggest that.

Anyway, they had promised Roy that it wasn’t going to take long. Obviously he had something really important planned for later today, so he didn’t have that much time. They had probably exaggerated his time already.

Sighing, Felicity got out of the car. Oliver followed right after her. When she unlocked the door, Oliver kissed her shoulder. Felicity moved away from his lips, though. She looked back at him over her shoulder and shook her head amusedly.

“Pull yourself together,” she said with a chuckle. “Roy will think that we exaggerated his time because we had sex.”

“He should be used to it by now,” Oliver mumbled into her ear.

Felicity chuckled once more, opening the door. Oliver circled her waist from behind, resting his hands on her bump. His chest pressed against her back and his legs bumped against hers whenever he took a step. It only made Felicity chuckle more. She put her hands to his forearms and leaned back against him.

She was just about to ask him if they were going to continue going like this when Oliver suddenly stopped, tensing slightly behind her. She could feel the muscles of his chest growing stiff against her back. His arms tightened around her, pulling her closer to him. Felicity frowned, looking at Oliver’s frozen facial expression.

“What’s-?”

Oliver quickly put hand to her lips, making her frown even more. For a short moment she worried that something was wrong with the kids and felt her heartbeat quickening in response, but then-

“You already said ‘no’ three times, Emmy,” Roy complained.

“Because I don’t want to.”

“This is not about if you want to or not. It’s about Thea.” Emmy released a deep sigh before Roy added, “Now, let’s try this again, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy replied, sighing quietly once more.

Oliver’s hand was still pressing onto her lips, so Felicity put her fingers around his wrist and pushed them down. Oliver gave her a pointed look, making sure she knew that he wanted to continue listening and that she had to stay quiet. She gave him a short nod of her head, and he allowed her to push his hands off her mouth. Sighing quietly, she rested her head back against Oliver’s shoulder and listened though she wasn’t exactly sure what she was going to listen to.

She heard the ruffling of clothes when Roy or Emmy or maybe both of them moved. Then Roy cleared his throat.

“Thea Queen,-“

“My name is Emmeline, Roy,” Emmy replied.

Roy sighed. “Yes, I know, but you should pretend you are Thea, remember?”

“Oh, right,” Emmy responded. “I forgot for a moment. Let’s try again.”

“Okay,” Roy said. “Thea Queen-“

“Shouldn’t it be Thea Dearden Queen?”

“You didn’t complain about that the three other times,” Roy said with a sigh.

“Now I am saying it, though.”

“Okay, fine,” Roy gave in. “Thea Dearden Queen, we-“

“I don’t like the Dearden,” Emmy interrupted him. “Better leave it out. Just say Thea.”

“Are you trying to make proposing extra hard now?”

Felicity’s eyes widened. She quickly turned her head to look at Oliver and she felt her heart warming at the expression in his eyes. He was clearly touched by the idea that his friend was going to propose to his sister, but there was also something else in his eyes. It wasn’t worry or fear, not really. It was rather the expression of a big brother feeling like he was going to lose his baby sister.

Thea was the one member of his family, the one he had had before the island he had left. His parents were dead. Tommy, who had been like a brother, was dead. Raisa who helped raise him, wasn’t around anymore. Oliver had lost a lot of the people who had been around when he had been little. Thea had been the one still close by his side and the idea that she was getting married probably wasn’t one he was exactly fond of despite the fact that he had already built his own family. He just needed to get used to the though first.

Felicity stroked her hands over his forearms. Oliver looked at her and quickly smiled. When Felicity squeezed his wrist gently, he leaned in and pecked the tip of her nose.

“Roy, it needs to be perfect,” Emmy eventually replied. “Try it again.”

Felicity smiled at the determination in her daughter’s voice. She clearly had detailed ideas what the perfect proposal looked like. Roy couldn’t have picked a more demanding helper to improve proposing.

“Thea, we have known each other for several years now, and after a slightly complicated start we have quickly learned to love each other. I didn’t have a family or a home, but now I do because I have you. You are my family, and you are my home. And I feel it is time for us to maybe take the next step. This is why I want to ask you here and now. Thea Queen, will you marry me?”

“Hm…” Emmy made, and Felicity could almost see her puckering her lips and tapping her forefinger against them. “Better not.”

When Roy groaned in frustration, Felicity pressed her lips together to keep herself from bursting out in laughter.

“Okay, what do I need to do to get a ‘yes’ from you?”

“I only say ‘yes’ to daddy.”

“Good girl!” Oliver called out. While Felicity was really bursting out into laughter now, Oliver quickly pecked her cheek and then let go of her to walk to the living room. He had only a taken few steps when Emmy was already running towards him and throwing herself at him. Oliver scooped her up into her arms easily, enjoying the tight hug she gave him. “Hi, sweetie.”

Felicity stepped out of her shoes, flat shoes to be exact. Oliver had finally talked her into quitting her high heels. Admittedly, it had been about time. Her feet and lower back ached as it was. She really didn’t need to make it worse by wearing shoes that increased both, the pain in her back as well as the one in her feet.

When Roy stepped out of the living room, Felicity quickly walked to him and kissed his cheek. She smiled at him, squeezing his hand before walking past him into the living room where he and the kids had left a chaos that would take her the whole evening to clean up. Instead of starting immediately she sat down on the back of the couch, though, watching Roy massage the back of his neck uncomfortably.

“I was going to talk to you about it,” Roy told Oliver, “and ask your permission.”

Oliver looked at his friend for a long moment before he sat Emmy back on the floor. The girl immediately ran to her mom, circling her waist as much as she could and pressing her face against the bump. Felicity moved her fingers over her daughter’s curly hair. She smiled, seeing how Emmy caressed the bump, telling her unborn sibling that she was already waiting impatiently for her.

“Where is Tommy?” Felicity asked in a whisper.

“Playing with Isa,” Emmy whispered back. “I think he has a crush on her.”

Felicity smiled at the thought. Tommy had a crush on their neighbor’s daughter as much as two-year-old could have a crush on anyone. He loved spending time with her, though. After he had been shy in his first minutes with her, she was now his best friend. The two of them were cute together.

She was too distracted to realize Oliver was seeking her eyes at first. As soon as she felt the slight tingling of her skin, telling her that he was looking at her, she looked up at him. Oliver looked at her like he was waiting for her approval or waiting for her to tell him that he was right about what he was feeling because his feelings could be seen in his eyes. Well, at least she could see it, and she smiled at him, reassuring him that what he was feeling was alright.

Oliver looked at her for a moment longer before he turned his eyes to his friend. He reached out a hand and when Roy put his hand in Oliver’s, Oliver pulled Roy against him into a manly hug, clapping his back.

“I am glad it is you,” Oliver told his friend. “If you hurt her, I will still kill you, though.”

Roy didn’t flinch. He just nodded and replied, “I am not going to hurt her.”

Felicity smiled at the two men, still combing Emmy’s hair with her fingers. She knew how hard it was for Oliver to accept change that he hadn’t planned himself. Letting go a little more of his baby sister, the baby sister he had tried to protect all the more since he had come back from the island was scaring for him. He would probably need time to adjust to it, but he would adjust, and Felicity was sure it wasn’t even going to take that long.

The two men shook hands once more, looking at each other determinedly. It was Roy who pulled his hand back first.

“I should go now. I still have some things to prepare,” Roy explained.

Quickly Felicity got up, pushing Emmy aside carefully, and approached him. She put a hand to his bicep and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to press a kiss to his cheek.

“I’d say ‘good luck’, but I am sure you won’t need it,” Felicity said. “Nah, I am going to say it anyway because it never hurts. Good luck, Roy.”

“Thanks, Felicity,” Roy whispered.

Emmy quickly hugged Roy’s legs too. “Good luck, Roy.”

“Thanks for your help, Emmy,” Roy replied, stroking his hand over Emmy’s head. “If Thea says ‘yes’, it is only because you helped me.”

“No, it’s because she loves you, Roy,” Emmy replied.

Felicity felt her heart warming at her daughter’s words. Emmy knew exactly how relationships were supposed to work, and Felicity couldn’t be happier for her little girl. Knowing the meaning of love and marriage at her young age was great. Felicity hoped her daughter would never lose that knowledge because Felicity felt like she had lost it when her father had left and-

Her thoughts came to a stop when Oliver circled her waist from behind and pressed his chest to her back. Felicity sighed, leaning back against him.

“Everything alright?” he whispered to her ear.

“I was going to ask you the same thing,” Felicity replied back over her shoulder. Oliver kissed the tip of her nose shortly. He was about to kiss her lips too, but Felicity pushed his chin away, turning to Roy. “Call us later, okay?”

Roy nodded. “Sure. See you.”

“Mommy, can we get Tommy back now?” Emmy asked.

Felicity chuckled. “Yes, let’s go get Tommy back.”

She stroked her hand over Oliver’s stubble, wordlessly telling him to take his time to process the news. Oliver took hold of her wrist and kissed her tender skin gently in wordless gratitude. He nodded, letting her know that he understood, and Felicity smiled.

“Come on, Emmy,” she said, letting go of Oliver. “Let’s go get our little boy back.”

 

 

It was almost midnight when Oliver’s phone rang. He only glanced as the display shortly before he gave Felicity a look, wordlessly telling her that it was Thea. Felicity snuggled closer to him in bed, resting her head on his shoulder, and Oliver took the phone.

Immediately she could hear Thea’s excited voice from the other end of the line even if she couldn’t understand the words she said. There hadn’t been any doubt about the result of the proposal for Felicity anyway. She smiled against Oliver’s neck, tightened her hold on his waist.

“Congratulations to the two of you then,” Oliver said calmly.

“From me too,” Felicity hurried to whisper.

“From Felicity too,” Oliver told Thea. His sister said some more excited words before Oliver replied, “Okay, then enjoy the rest of this evening and… I’m really happy for you, Thea.”

When Oliver hung up the phone, he immediately put both arms around Felicity’s body and held her to him tightly. He kissed the crown of her head before he rested his chek against her hair and sighed.

Felicity stroked his abs. “Are you alright?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes. It’s just weird, you know? It’s like yesterday she was a still a little girl, following Tommy and me around the house and earning her nickname. Now suddenly she stands next to me with her bow and arrow, fighting criminals, and gets married. It’s… It’s weird. I feel like I still haven’t gotten used to her being in the field to me. How am I supposed to picture her as a wife and mother?”

“I know,” Felicity said with a quiet sigh. “She’s an adult now, and she makes huge life choices, but that is the way it is supposed to be. I know you still want to see her as your little sister, but there is no need to. Thea can handle yourself. You just need to be there when she reaches out for you.”

“I will,” Oliver said firmly, “but it’s still a big change.”

“You’ll get used to it eventually.”

Smiling, Oliver stroked his hand over the bump. “I soon get another girl to take care of, right?”

Felicity put her hand to Oliver’s. “Right.”


	178. The love of a family

Felicity sighed contently when the delicious mint chocolate chip ice cream melted on her tongue. Lately the baby craved ice cream all day or maybe Felicity just projected her own desire for her favorite ice cream flavor on the baby. Anyway, the ice cream tasted amazing, and it was the perfect dessert for the dinner Oliver had cooked for their family and friends.

With a warm smile on her lips she took a quick look around, finding all their family and friends engrossed in conversations. It had been Oliver’s idea to invite everyone over for dinner to just spend some time together and also announce the godparents for their unborn baby. They had planned on doing so on Christmas, but her father had crossed their plans and taken away some of Felicity’s joy for the holidays. Now there were only eight more weeks separating them from meeting their third baby and Felicity and Oliver both felt it was about time to-

Her thoughts came to a sudden step when she felt the tips of Oliver’s fingers grazing her knee under the table. Her hand stilled in the air on the way to push the next spoon of ice cream into her mouth. She glanced at Oliver, finding him engrossed into a conversation with John. When the palm of Oliver’s hand rested flat on her thigh right over her knee, warming her sensitive skin, Felicity pushed the spoon into her mouth, enjoying the innocent contact.

She loved having their family and friends here. After her father’s new betrayal it was good to have the family she had chosen and the family she knew loved her around. It was-

Again Felicity’s thoughts were interrupted when she felt Oliver’s fingers traveling up the inside of her thigh. The side of his hand pushed up the fabric of her skirt, revealing more and more skin to his touch. When he reached higher than the mid of her thigh, Felicity pressed her legs together, trying to keep his hand from moving further upwards.

Putting her empty bowl away, Felicity looked at Oliver, but he was still talking to John like his hand had a life on his own he didn’t know about. Felicity shot a quick look around, making sure nobody was watching. She then moved her hand under the table to Oliver’s. She put her hands around his wrist and tried to pull his hand away from between her legs, but Oliver kept his hand where it was stubbornly. She carefully wiggled her hips, trying to get his hand to at least move lower on her leg, but the movement made his hand only slip further up her thigh. His pinky grazed the lace of her panties that covered her sex and a quiet whimper left her lips.

Luckily the sound was drowned by Thea’s sudden demand, “Okay, spit it out now! Who’s going to be godparents?”

Thea put her elbow to the table and rested her chin on her hand, putting the engagement ring Roy had slid onto her finger only a couple of days ago in perfect spotlight. She smiled at her brother and sister-in-law hopefully, and Felicity tried to smile back, but it wasn’t easy to do so with Oliver’s hand still between her thighs. His pinky was moving up and down her folds as much as it could. The slight touch was enough to put her nerve endings on fire, though.

“You know, that is a fabulous idea,” Felicity replied, tightening her hold on Oliver’s wrist and finally getting his hand to slip away from between her thighs. She put both of her hands to his, resting them low on her thigh and patting the back of Oliver’s hand, asking, “Right, hon?”

“Well, if you say so,” Oliver replied with a smug smile, squeezing her hand. When he turned his eyes to the others, he cleared his throat. “I think this is actually the right time to say some words.”

“What, you’re giving a speech now?” Roy asked.

“Why not?” Barry replied. “It’s an important occasion.”

“It’s easy for you to say that,” Laurel replied and took a nip of her water. “You already are godparent, while others like me are impatiently waiting to find out if now it’s finally their time.”

“I think you will have to wait another few years, Laurel,” Thea told her with a chuckle, “because Ollie already promised me that I was going to be godmother again.”

Felicity looked at Oliver. “When did you promise her that?”

“Shortly after Tommy was born,” Thea replied for Oliver.

“What I wanted to say,” Oliver tried to get back their guests attention without success.

“So no godchild for me?” Laurel asked. “You all have your own kids. You could at least share them with me a little, you know? I will babysit as much as you want if that helps.”

“Hey, we don’t have kids,” Roy replied.

“Yes, but you are getting married soon, so it probably won’t take long,” Donna told Roy with a wink. “Besides-“

Oliver cleared his throat loudly, but still nobody cared to give him attention. Everyone was still agitatedly chatting about babies and godparents and other stuff. Oliver groaned slightly, while Felicity chuckled at his grumpiness.

“We don’t give speeches during family gatherings, Oliver,” Felicity told him, squeezing his hand, “unless it’s a wedding.”

Oliver shot her a short look. “Okay, fine, I will just announce the godparents.”

As if everyone had just waited for him to say that, they all fell silent and looked at him expectantly. Felicity could see in his eyes that he considered giving a speech nonetheless, but she squeezed his hand and shook her head. Sighing, Oliver decided to give in.

“Fine, so godparents for baby number three are Roy and Laurel. Congratulations. Over and out.”

Felicity chuckled, leaning in and kissing his cheek. “That was still a nice speech.”

Oliver grumbled, but when he turned his head and looked at Felicity, he smiled. Chuckling, Felicity leaned in and kissed him. She was about to deep the kiss when the voices around them caught up to her.

“What? Ollie, you promised me,” Thea complained.

“Hey, you already have a godchild. It was totally my turn,” Laurel replied.

“You know, we can absolutely share the godparent duties,” Roy told Thea, patting her thigh. “Besides, I guess it’s official that I am Oliver and Felicity’s favorite friend now, you know? They christened their first child after me, and now I am being godfather to their third child.”

Oliver only rolled his eyes at the chaos that was going on, while Felicity chuckled once more.

It hadn’t taken them too long to decide who should be their baby’s godparents. Since John, Lyla, Thea and Barry were all godparents to one of their kids already, they had decided to look for other godparents under their friends. They had very soon decided that it should be Roy and were even surer about it now that he and Thea were engaged. It was like a welcome into the family though he had been part of it for years already. Felicity had then suggested Laurel as godmother and he had agreed after she had convinced Oliver that she really thought that was a good idea because they were close to Laurel despite the fact that she was his ex.

“Do you already know if it’s a boy or a girl?” Quentin asked.

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “We will let ourselves be surprised.”

“Well, actually we do know the baby’s sex,” Oliver explained. “It’s always girls.”

Quentin frowned and so did Felicity. “We have two kids, a boy and a girl. If we take William into it, it’s two boys and one girl.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “For me it feels like it is always girls.”

“It’s probably because we usually spend much more time thinking about girl’s names.”

“Do you have one already?” Iris asked. “A name I mean?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “We haven’t even started talking about it.”

Lyla perked up an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Isn’t it about time to have that talk then?” Caitlin asked.

“Eight weeks will be over in no time,” John agreed.

“Well, I think we will soon start with the talk,” Felicity said, patting Oliver’s thigh. “Now that Little Oliver is behaving again, and we can actually focus on that thought.”

“Little Oliver?” Iris asked.

“Felicity started calling me that awhile ago,” Oliver quickly explained.

“Oliver annoyed me, so I started calling him that,” Felicity added, shrugging her shoulders.

She looked at Oliver with a teasing smile. They both knew that she actually hadn’t started calling him like that but rather his penis that had started to fail when Felicity’s had gone into sexual overdrive a few weeks before Christmas. Somehow they just enjoyed talking about him too much, or at least Felicity loved to talk about him and tease Oliver with that.

When Felicity glanced past Oliver to John and noticed his gaze, she quickly looked down, feeling a blush spreading on her cheeks. If John’s look had been any indication, he knew exactly who Little Oliver was. She pressed her lips together, trying to hide her embarrassment.

Felicity quickly cleared her throat. “Anyway, does anyone need something to drink?”

 

 

Oliver leaned against the fireplace, watching Felicity carefully. She was sitting on the couch with Tommy on her lap. She was gently rocking him from one side to the other while Tommy had his head rested against her shoulder and was moving his hands over her cheeks tiredly. Felicity turned her head every now and then to kiss Tommy’s little hands while she was talking to Laurel and Cisco. She looked happy with the soft smile on her lips.

He took a sip of his beer when Quentin stepped next to him.

“Hey,” Oliver said with a smile.

Quentin smiled back, following Oliver’s gaze to Felicity. “Is she alright?”

“She’s fine,” Oliver replied with a content smile, “apart from a little backache maybe.”

He knew that Quentin had been worried about Felicity after he had learned about Noah’s return and betrayal. Quentin had known about Felicity’s pregnancy depression, and he had helped Oliver to get through it. He was also taking care of Felicity like she was his own daughter and by that he was already a much better father to her than Noah would ever be.

“I am glad she got through the struggle with her father,” Quentin said, looking at Felicity. “I would have hated for her to suffer because of that guy.”

“Agreed,” Oliver mumbled, tightening his hold on the bottle of beer. “I know Felicity needed to handle things with him her way, and getting him arrested was the best solution, but I still wished I would have gotten my hands on him just once.”

Oliver felt his fingers tingling with the need to punch Noah Kuttler’s face from time to time. He deserved to take some hard punches for what he had done to Felicity back in her childhood as well as now. He knew it wasn’t what Felicity wanted, though. She was done with her father, so Oliver would have to let the matter rest.

“You know, as Captain I can easily get access to the bastard,” Quentin said quietly, looking at Felicity. “In case you ever need to get off some tension in a way that doesn’t include Little Oliver-“

Oliver almost choked on his beer, and he had to quickly wipe his mouth clean. He coughed, tears in his eyes as he struggled to take in a breath.

“Yeah, that was how I was feeling at that mention,” Quentin told him, shaking his head. “Really, there was family and friends all around you, including kids. Pull yourself together!”

Oliver slapped his chest until he had his breathing back under control. He knew that John had realized what he and Felicity had really talked about, but he hadn’t thought anyone else would have. John just knew them for so long.

“I’m sorry,” he quickly said. “I know Felicity is like a daughter to you and-“

“Yes, she is,” Quentin interrupted him, “so I would prefer to not hear any more stories about Little Oliver. You know I am not a fan of that guy given his history with my daughters.”

Oliver pressed his lips together, giving Quentin a nod. It had been a while since Oliver had felt this embarrassed the last time. He loved when Felicity felt a little embarrassed because she would blush in a way that he would enjoy to watch. Now that he felt like this, though, he was actually sorry for wishing even the slightest embarrassment on Felicity.

“Anyway,” Quentin said slowly, obviously intending to change the subject, “Felicity is fine and that is all that matters, right?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, absolutely. She had a few low days, especially after what happened with Noah, but there was nothing really bad. We can just look forward to have our baby.”

“I am very happy to hear that.”

Oliver smiled, watching Felicity pushing Tommy to Cisco’s lap when she got up and walked towards the door. When she was about to go past him, though, Oliver quickly took her hand and pulled her against him, so her back pressed to his chest. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind tightly and ducked his head to press his lips to the juncture of her neck and shoulder for a moment.

Felicity chuckled. “What has gotten into you?”

“I just told Quentin how happy we are.”

“Oh, we absolutely are,” Felicity agreed, snuggling her cheek to Oliver’s bicep, and Oliver kissed her temple. “Little Oliver makes me really happy.”

“Okay, I’m out,” Quentin said, turning on his heels and leaving them.

Felicity frowned. “What’s going on with him?”

“He knows,” Oliver whispered into her ear.

“He- Oh my god!” Felicity said with a gasp for breath when she got it, and a deep blush formed on her face. Oliver tried to remember why exactly he was supposed to feel sorry for her, but he really didn’t know. The way the blush crawled down between her breasts and under the neckline of her dress was just too distracting.


	179. This time we do it right

“Hey, what are you doing there?”

Felicity looked at Oliver with a frown, kicking the door shut behind her. She rearranged the grocery bags in her arms before she dropped her keys into the bowl on the small table next to the door. “What does it look like?”

“It looks like you are carrying two way too heavy grocery bags,” Oliver replied, quickly crossing the distance to her. He took the backs from her arms, shaking his head. “You’re pregnant. You’re not supposed to wear heavy stuff like that.”

Felicity rolled her eyes with a chuckle. “They are not that heavy.”

“I’m still feeling better if you are not carrying them yourself,” Oliver told her, leaned down and gently pecked her lips. “Did you drop Emmy at Lyla’s and John’s place?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a nod, sighing. “She was so excited about the sleepover that she even forgot to kiss me goodbye.”

Felicity pushed her bottom lip forward, making a sad face. Oliver smiled comfortingly.

“You know, if you want someone to kiss you, I would be willing.”

“Oh really?” Felicity asked. She stepped right in front of him, so her bump was pressing against his abs, and circled his waist with her arms. She looked at him with a happy smile, a glint of amusement in her eyes. “Well, we could try and see if your kiss comforts me over the lack of a kiss from Emmy.”

Oliver didn’t need to be told twice. He used every opportunity there was to kiss Felicity, so this wasn’t any different. Smiling, he leaned down and gently brushed his lips against hers twice before pressing down a little bit more firmly. Felicity stepped closer to him, pressing her warm body against his more tightly. As soon as he felt her lips opening against his, Oliver responded by opening up to her and welcoming her tongue in his mouth. They both sighed quietly. He could feel their baby kicking against his stomach and smiled into the kiss, feeling Felicity doing the same.

When their lips parted, he smiled down at her. “So? What’s your judgment? Am I a good comfort-kisser?”

“Hm…” Felicity made. “I think I need a second one just to make sure this wasn’t a lucky hit.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned back down. Right before his lips met hers, he heard Tommy calling from the kitchen, “Dada! Come back!”

“I guess you are demanded on a second front.”

Oliver chuckled quietly. He pecked Felicity’s lips shortly. “I am desired today.”

“Not only today,” Felicity replied, playfully slapping his butt when he turned around to head to the kitchen.

He glanced back at her over his shoulder, winking, and Felicity smiled happily in response. She followed him into the kitchen where Tommy was sitting at the kitchen island with his legs bent under his body. He was playing with Play-Doh, forming colorful things on the countertop.

“Mommy’s back home,” Oliver told Tommy, adding in a loud whisper, “and I think she needs a kiss.”

Immediately Tommy let the Play-Doh fall down. He turned on the stool and reached his arms out for Felicity. “Mama!”

Felicity hurried to step in front of Tommy, putting her hands to hips to keep him from slipping off the bar stool. Tommy got up on his knees by putting his hands on the top of Felicity’s stomach and using his hold on her to get more leverage. He then put his hands to Felicity’s cheeks and kissed her gently. Smiling, Felicity nuzzled his nose, and the boy laughed.

“I think I found the perfect comfort-kisser.”

“Hey, his kiss only had an effect on you because my kiss already did the groundwork,” Oliver complained over Felicity’s chuckle. “I-“

“Dada, come here!” Tommy requested, holding out a hand for Oliver.

He quickly put the grocery bags to the kitchen island and went over to his son. Holding onto his father’s hand, Tommy sat back down on his heels and pointed at the colorful forms on the countertop.

“Dada, look!”

Oliver smiled. “They are beautiful. Maybe one day you will become an artist.”

Felicity chuckled, taking the small bucket of ice cream from the grocery back and putting it to the freezer. “I can’t really see our son as an agonized artist.”

“Who says he will be agonized?” Oliver asked. He stepped behind Tommy, wrapping his arms around his son’s small body and watching over his shoulder how Tommy was forming more forms with the Play-Doh. “Maybe he will be a very happy artist.”

Felicity smiled. “That would be nice.”

“Yes, it would be,” Oliver replied and kissed Tommy’s cheek.

As little as Oliver wanted to think about his children growing up, he liked picturing them happy in their future. They wouldn’t end up on a deserted island where they were tortured and robbed of several years of their lives, returning changed in a way they would never truly recover from. Oliver would never allow something like that to happen to his children. He wouldn’t rest until he had them back and-

“Oliver?”

He looked up, seeing Felicity’s worried gaze. Oliver chuckled, shaking his thoughts off by shaking his head. When he caught Felicity’s still worried gaze, he blew her a kiss. Felicity watched him one more moment, the wordless offer to talk if he wanted to on her face. Oliver smiled at her reassuringly, though, slightly shaking his head to tell her that he was okay. Felicity smiled back, turned around and continued to put the groceries in the cupboards.

Oliver watched her carefully. She was wearing wide pants and one of his hoddies. She was almost drowning in the way too large fabric, her body looking so much smaller than it was already. Yet she was beautiful and – and that was even more important – happy. Her cheeks were rosy, her full lips formed to a content smile. Oliver loved seeing that look on her face. He loved knowing that she was happy without anything bothering her.

He was happy when she was happy, and the last thing he wanted was to do or say anything that might take any of her happiness away from her. There was something he needed to talk about to her, though. He didn’t exactly think that it would take away from her happiness if he talked to her about that, but it might upset her maybe. Maybe it wouldn’t even do that and he was just-

“Dada, it stopped raining,” Tommy suddenly said.

Oliver looked up and out of the window, nodding his head. “You’re right. Should we go and take a walk now? You could drive on your balance bicycle if you like to.”

“Yes!”

“Yes?” Oliver asked. “Should we ask mommy if she comes with us?”

Tommy nodded eagerly. “Mommy, you come with us?”

Felicity smiled. “Yes, of course. Mommy is putting the other groceries away, and then we can go. You should wash your hands.”

“Okay,” Tommy said with a smile. He was very proud that he could now wash his hands alone without any help. They had put small stools to the sinks, so he could reach it, and Tommy eagerly washed his hands whenever he got the chance to. “Dada, help me.”

Oliver quickly lifted Tommy from the bar stool and set him down on the floor. The boy didn’t waste any second and immediately ran off, making Oliver smile.

When he turned his gaze back to Felicity, she had her back turned towards him. She was putting things in the fridge, humming a melody with low voice. It took Oliver a short moment to recognize it, but he smiled as soon as he realized that it was a lullaby. Sometimes when their unborn baby was moving a lot, especially during the nightly hours, Felicity would hum the lullaby to their unborn child, and the baby would stop kicking.

Oliver pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He didn’t know why he felt so uncomfortable about talking to Felicity about the phone call he had received today. He knew in the back of his mind that there was no reason for him to be worried. The last time they had talked about something like this had been a completely different. It wasn’t comparable.

“Oh my, what did you do?”

“Huh?”

Oliver looked up with a questioning expression on his face, finding Felicity’s gaze on him. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest over the bump. Her head was cocked, her eyes narrowed on him as she was taking him intently.

“What computer did you mess up? Is it my tablet here or is it the system in the Arrow Cave?” she asked him.

“Huh?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “You have your hands pushed into the pockets of his jeans. You are hunching your shoulders. You are looking at me with these big, blue puppy eyes that are pleading for forgiveness. I would appreciate if you could tell me what computer it is, so I can work on fixing the damage immediately before any hacker manages to break through the fire walls and-“

“I was asked to participate in another wrestling thing.”

“What?”

Oliver pressed his lips together, rolling them into his mouth for a short moment.

He loved wrestling. Participating in a wrestling match had been a childhood dream of his, and a little more than three years ago he had finally been able to fulfill that desire. He had been asked to wrestle against the Flash, well, the Flash of the wrestling world. He had been so excited, and he had wanted to surprise Felicity with it. Everything had been planned out and put into action perfectly. The only problem had been that Felicity’s prenatal depression had gotten in the way of his surprise. She hadn’t been enjoying it. Instead she had been mad at him. She had been mad that he had been risking his cover and had been setting a bad example for their children and had even been mad at him for risking his reputation in the business world. That hadn’t been how he had imagined things to go at all.

“I got a call this morning,” he explained, nervously moving his thumb against the tips of his other fingers in the pocket of his jeans. “They want another wrestling special with the Flash and me. They would write another script for us, and we would, well, play it out.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow.

“I already told them that the chances that I am doing this are very low,” Oliver hurried to say. He pulled his hands out of the pockets of his jeans and held them in front of him defensively. “I just wanted you to know that there was an offer, but of course I am going to turn it down and-“

He was interrupted when Felicity quickly crossed the distance between them. She took his hands, entwining their fingers, and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to press a passionate kiss to his lips. Her tongue invaded his mouth, stroking against his tongue. Oliver moaned quietly, responding to the kiss with equal passion. When Felicity broke the kiss, he chased her lips, wanting more, but Felicity leaned back and out of his reach.

“You absolutely cannot turn down that offer,” Felicity told him with a wide smile. “Really, this is going to be so amazing! The thought is already setting me on fire. We are so going to have sex all night that night and- Wait! When is that thing going to happen? Please tell me it’s not right after the birth because that would be terrible. We wouldn’t be able to have sex, and I so want to have sex with you when you come home. I might even get a cheerleader costume which might go hand in hand with fulfilling another wish on your list. Well, if it is on the list. I don’t know because you won’t show me the list. Anyway, doesn’t matter right now. Where was I? Oh, right, when is that thing taking place?”

“In three weeks,” Oliver replied immediately.

Felicity hopped up and down, clapping her hands excitedly. She was smiling like Oliver had barely ever seen her smile. She was so excited and so happy it warmed Oliver’s heart. That was the reaction he had hoped to get from her the first time around already. Now he got it, and he knew that she wasn’t only excited about what they would do later that night. She was also happy for him because she knew that this was his childhood dream come true, and she could take part in it.

He eyes her up closely, finding no hesitation and no doubt in her eyes. Yet he asked, “Are you sure?”

Smiling, Felicity put her hands to his cheeks and kissed his lips firmly. “Absolutely.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied with a smile that mirrored hers. “I will call them and tell them that I will do this.”

 “This is going to be so good!” Felicity squealed. She straightened up on her tiptoes and started peppering kisses all over his face. Between the kisses she said, “You will distract Tommy, so he doesn’t get impatient to get outside, and I will quickly make sure we will have a babysitter for the night, so we can have sex all night and the morning. You should prepare for a sex marathon. See you later.”

With one last kiss to his lips she turned around and hurried out of the kitchen, grabbing her phone from the kitchen counter on her way. Oliver smiled after her, chuckling quietly.

He shouldn’t have been nervous about the planned new match. He knew she hadn’t been herself the first time around. Now she was because now she was happy and at piece. They both were.

Whatever that match would bring, after seeing the excited expression on Felicity’s face and hear her babble about her plans to support him, Oliver knew that it was worth it already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI - I will probably update every four to six days from now on. The next two chapters are already written, but I need for prepare for when times get busier and writing more exhausting again. Besides, I am working on some other projects too right now. ;)


	180. Stay with me

As soon as the alarm clock went off, Felicity woke up. Sighing contently, she stretched out her legs under the blanket to get a feeling of her slightly aching muscles. She didn’t exactly want to leave the warmth of the position, pressed against Oliver’s side with their legs entangled and her head resting on his shoulder. She knew that if she wanted to take a shower and have breakfast before meeting with Ray to go to the first day of that tech fair, she had to get up, though.

Sighing once more, she pressed a kiss to Oliver’s naked chest and rolled onto her other side. She reached out a hand and switched off the alarm. Part of her just wanted to turn back around and snuggle back to Oliver’s side, but she had come to New York for a reason, and it wasn’t to spend a lazy morning in a hotel bed with Oliver. As intriguing as that was she had come here to see what new inventions there were in the tech-world. She could still spend lazy mornings with her husband when they were back in Starling.

She was just about to move her legs off the mattress, so she could get up, when Oliver’s arm circled her waist. He released a low grumble, easily pulling her back against him until her back rested against his chest. He almost curled around her body, entangling his legs with hers and pressing his morning hood against her butt. His arm tightened around her so much that she couldn’t move away from him. His cheek snuggled to the side of her neck, his stubble rubbing against her sensitive skin.

Felicity chuckled, stroking her hand over Oliver’s forearm. She felt his lips pressing a gentle kiss to her shoulder, and she sighed contently in response. Maybe she could allow herself to lie back and enjoy this cuddle for five short minutes, she thought. On the other hand she knew her husband too well. Five minutes wouldn’t stay five minutes. He would prolong this as much as he wanted which would mean for at least half an hour, probably longer if the kids didn’t wake up in the meantime.

“Oliver, I have to get up,” Felicity said, squeezing his forearm.

Oliver only released a low grumbled, rubbing his cheek against her neck. His stubble tickled and scratched her skin with equal measure. She loved the feeling and sighed contently, snuggling back against him for only a short moment, though.

“Oliver,” she whispered, squeezing his forearm once more. “Oliver, I need to get up.”

Again Oliver only released a low grumbled before she sighed sleepily. He moved one of his legs forward, pushing his leg between both of hers. If Oliver continued like that, she was certainly going to fall back asleep soon.

“Oliver,” she said once more, louder this time.

Felicity frowned. Oliver barely was ever this fast asleep, especially when they weren’t sleeping at home in their own bed. He would only allow himself to drift into a light sleep that he would wake up from with every unusual sound, sensing danger. It took Felicity only the break of a second to realize what he was doing.

“Oliver, I know you’re not sleeping.”

“Of course I am,” Oliver replied immediately with wake voice, snuggling his face to the side of her neck. “I’m very fast asleep and can’t hear you saying that you want to leave.”

Felicity chuckled. “That’s a lot of talking for someone who is fast asleep.”

“Well, I am multitasking.”

She could feel the corner of his lips lifting against her skin as he was smiling contently. She was affected by his smile immediately, smiling into her pillow too.

“Oliver, come on,” Felicity said gently.

“Oliver doesn’t want to let you go.”

“You know it’s weird when you’re talking about yourself in the third person, right?”

“You don’t mind when we talk about a certain part of my body like that.”

Again Felicity chuckled. “Well, Little Oliver is always a pleasure to talk about.”

“Just to talk about?” Oliver asked back, rubbing his morning wood against her butt.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, suppressing a moan. Embraced by the warmth of Oliver’s body and by the scent of his skin, the thought of just skipping the first hours of the tech fair and spend a little more time here with Oliver was more tempting than ever. She could just stop trying to get out of bed and let Oliver take lead. It would all be really simple.

“We can have fun like that again tonight,” Felicity told him, “but not now.”

“What if I hurry?” Oliver whispered into her ear, relentlessly rubbing himself against her ass. “Just give me a few minutes and skip the shower. This could be a win-win-situation.”

Felicity chuckled. “You consider me going to the tech fair smelling all sweaty and like someone who had just sex a win for me?”

Oliver pressed a lingering kiss to the soft skin right under her ear. “Sure, why not?”

“Maybe because I would stink?”

“Well, just keep your distance from everyone on that fair then, so they won’t smell it,” Oliver suggested, kissing down her neck. “They won’t notice.”

Felicity chuckled, but it turned into a moan when Oliver’s lips pressed to her pulse point. His mouth opened against her skin, his tongue lazily moving over it. His teeth grazed the spot shortly before he started sucking the skin into his mouth.

“Are you leaving a hickey?”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed his confirmation unashamedly.

He didn’t let go of her skin, and Felicity didn’t make him. She knew how much he loved leaving visible marks on her body. Most of the time he left them where nobody but him could see, knowing that she didn’t want to show them at work. He also knew, in general, she loved carrying his marks in some weird way. She loved knowing that she belonged to him and that Oliver wanted everyone to know that she belonged to him. She just didn’t want that to stand in the way of her reputation as a tough business woman. Anyway, the mark he was leaving on her neck today would be hard to hide. Felicity didn’t mind, though. She was a woman madly in love with her husband, who loved to let his passion take over and leave marks on her body. There was nothing to be ashamed of about that.  

When Oliver let go of her neck, he gently swiped his thumb over her skin to wipe away some spit that had been left there. He eyed up his mark carefully. “Perfect.”

Felicity chuckled. “Can you let me go then?”

“No,” Oliver replied immediately, lying back down and snuggling his body as close to her as possible. “I don’t want to let you go. Just stay with me.”

“Oliver,” Felicity said gently.

“No,” he just responded. “Stay.”

“Oliver.”

“Stay with me.”

“But I-“

“Don’t go,” Oliver whispered, rubbing his hand over her bump, and their baby responded to his caress by kicking against his hand firmly. “Stay with me.”

“Oliver.”

“Just stay with me.”

“I promised to go.”

“You also promised never to leave me.”

Felicity chuckled. “I am just spending the day having fun at the fair, not running off with another guy.”

Oliver grumbled against her neck before he whispered once more, “Stay here with me.”

“Oliver, please.”

Grumbling once more, Oliver tightened his arms around her shortly, burying his face against the side of her neck. He pressed his lips to the juncture of her neck and shoulder before he let go of her with a sigh.

“Go ahead. Leave me alone. Break my heart.”

Felicity chuckled, gently rubbing her hand over his naked chest while she was getting up on her knees. “Don’t worry, hon. I will come back and make it up to you later today.”

“Oh, really?” Oliver asked, obviously intrigued. He rolled onto his side, propping his head up onto his hand. He looked at her nosily. “Tell me more, Mrs. Queen.”

“Well,” Felicity said, sitting back on her heels and stroking her hand over on his chest, tracing the waistband of his sweatpants with her fingertips, “I am sure I will find a way that will please Little Oliver.”

Oliver licked his lips. “Consider me intrigued to hear more.”

Felicity leaned down, brushing her lips against his. “Maybe Little Oliver gets a special treatment by my mouth.”

She saw the glint in Oliver’s eyes and felt the low grumble vibrating through his chest at her words. He licked his lips once more.

“Fine. We might have found a deal.”

“So I am allowed to leave the bed?” Felicity asked.

Oliver nodded. “Yes. You can go, but first I want a little foretaste of what your lips feel like, something to get me through the day, you know?”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow in question and Oliver put his forefinger right under his lips, wordlessly demanding a kiss. Felicity chuckled, leaning down and kissing him. It was meant to be a short peck to the lips, but Oliver deepened the kiss before she could pull back. He moved a hand into her hair, keeping her in place while his tongue was invading her mouth, exploring it with his tongue. Only when the need for breath was growing too strong to ignore, Felicity pulled away with a chuckle.

“Okay, that should be enough to give you an idea of what to expect later today,” Felicity told him. “You just need to make sure that the kids are tired enough to fall asleep and not interrupt us.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Oliver told her. “I will chase them through the park all day. They will be asleep before you even get back here.”

“Send me pictures to get me through the day?” she asked when crawling out of bed.

“Do I get nudes?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “No.”

“Then you don’t get photos either.”

Chuckling, Felicity strolled over to the bathroom door. She opened it and stepped into the large room. She was about to close the door behind her when she turned around and leaned into the doorframe, watching Oliver, who was already watching her.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“You remember when we talked about jealousy, and I told you that you were allowed to be a little bit jealous like in a teasing way?”

“Yes.” Oliver perked up his eyebrow.

Felicity smiled warmly. “Well, you totally nailed it.”

Oliver smiled back at her contently before licking his lips. “Won’t stay the only thing I will nail today.”

Felicity chuckled. “Good to know.”

She quickly blew him a kiss before closing the door and heading under the shower, a happy smile on her lips that didn’t fade away all day.


	181. Sweet inspiration

Felicity tugged the blanket higher until Emmy was safely covered with it from her feet to her chin. She then sat down at the edge of her daughter’s bed and stroked her hand over the young girl’s hair. Emmy yawned tiredly. Her eyes were already falling shut, but she was still trying to fight the sleep by rubbing her fists over her eyes whenever they fell shut. Felicity smiled at the sight.

“Did you like your birthday party?”

Emmy nodded. “Yes.”

“And whose birthday are we going to celebrate next?”

“The baby’s!” Emmy said happily.

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied with a smile. She tugged at the blanket once more, asking, “Are you warm?”

Emmy nodded. “Yes.”

“Okay.” Slowly Felicity leaned down and kissed her daughter’s lips. “Good night, little birthday girl.”

“Night, Mommy.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over Emmy’s hair once last time before she strolled towards the door. When she turned around to ask if she should leave the door ajar, Emmy was already fast asleep. Smiling, Felicity stepped out of her daughter’s bedroom and closed the door behind her. It had been a busy day for the now five-year-old.

How did time fly this quickly? It was like yesterday when she had held Baby Emmy in her arms for the first time, overwhelmed with joy about her first child’s birth. Now Emmy had turned five years old already, would start going to preschool in summer and soon be a grown-up. Well, at least she had another tiny baby to look forward to, Felicity thought, stroking her hand over the baby bump.

“God, I start sounding like Oliver,” Felicity mumbled to herself, rolling her eyes.

She strolled down the hallway, stopping in front of Tommy’s room. She could hear the low voices coming from inside and smiled. Oliver was reading Tommy a story, changing his voice whenever one of the characters spoke. Part of her wanted to just sneak in and join the two of them, but she also knew that it would only take longer for Tommy to fall asleep then.

Sighing lowly, Felicity turned around and walked to her own bedroom. She let herself plop onto the mattress, feeing her lower back and feet aching slightly.

“You’re getting quite heavy in there,” Felicity mumbled, stroking her hand over the baby bump. The little person growing inside of her answered by kicking her little feet against Felicity’s hand. She chuckled. “Don’t worry. I wasn’t exactly complaining.”

Felicity glanced at her watch. It was almost eight-thirty, so definitely not early enough to go to bed yet. That probably meant that tonight would be the unlucky night that she and Oliver would finally talk about a name for their baby. They had been avoiding this discussion for weeks now, and they both knew it was long overdue, but, well, discussing baby names easily turned into a fight with them. They just had quite different taste regarding baby names.

Puckering her lips, Felicity decided that if today was the day to discuss baby names after all, she could at least make sure she had some advantage in the discussion. Smiling mischievously, Felicity strolled into the bathroom and drew a bath. She moved her fingertips through the water slowly, making sure it wasn’t too hot. Once some water had gathered in the tub, she opened one of the drawers of the cabinet, taking the first bottle of bath additive she found and poured some of it into the tub.

When she heard steps coming closer, she quickly got out of her dress and made herself comfortable in the bathtub. She sighed at the cozy warmth that was surrounding her. Only the front of the baby bump broke through the surface. She rested her head back and closed her eyes.

“Hon?” Oliver asked quietly from the bedroom.

“I’m in the bathroom,” Felicity replied.

“You know what we are going to do now, right?”

“What did you say? You need to come closer,” Felicity fibbed.

She bit her lips, keeping herself from smiling triumphantly, when she heard Oliver step into the bathroom. She heard him taking in a deep breath.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he said between clenched jaws.

Felicity opened her eyes, looking at him innocently. “I have no idea what you mean.”

Oliver gripped the door handle tightly, looking at her with slightly darkened eyes. “You know exactly what I mean. There is no way we will have the baby name discussion as long as you’re naked.”

“Why?” Felicity asked. “Are you scared that Little Oliver is taking the reign over you?”

“Nobody is taking reign over me,” Oliver replied with tense voice.

Felicity cocked her head. “Are you sure, hon? I think I remember times when Little Oliver just did what he wanted, and you weren’t able to hold him back from that. Like remember that time we had sex in the changing room of a boutique because he couldn’t wait any longer?”

Oliver licked his lips, releasing a low grumbled. Felicity lowered herself a little more, stroking one hand over the naked skin of her baby bump. She was so going to get what she wanted, she thought to herself. The view of her lying in the bathtub was already having an effect on him. Now she just needed to present her A-game of dirty talk.

“You know, Little Oliver and I could make a deal,” Felicity suggested with seductive voice. “He meets me like a little more than half-way regarding our discussion and I will show my gratitude in whatever way he wants. I have this new red lipstick that would look good on him.”

Oliver almost growled when he started moving. With two large steps he crossed the distance to her, got down on his knees right next to the bathtub and pressed his lips to hers. His hand moved into her hair, holding her to him. His lips opened, his tongue tracing her bottom lip. As soon as Felicity granted him entrance, his tongue slipped into her mouth, tangling with hers. Felicity moaned into the kiss, holding onto his wrist, while she was already celebrating her victory.

When the need for air grew too much for her to bear, she let her head fall back and gasped for breath. Oliver meanwhile slid his lips over her cheek to her ear. He kissed the soft skin right under her lobe before he leaned his lips against the shell of her ear and whispered, “Felicity, I am not trading my say about our baby’s name for sexual favors.”

The triumphant smile that had been on her lips died. Felicity pulled back enough to look at him. If the expression on Oliver’s face was any indication, he had known exactly what she had tried to do the entire time.

“We are going to discuss baby names now,” he told her firmly, “and you are not going to get to use that fact that you are naked and wet to get what you want.”

“Do you want me to get out of the bathtub to make sure of that?” Felicity asked, not ready to fully give up yet.

She watched Oliver’s thumb rubbing against the other fingertips nervously. She could almost see what was going through his mind. The image of her getting out of the bathtub, the water running down her naked body, surely did things to him.

“You will stay here,” Oliver told her with tense voice. “I’ll be back in a second.”

With that he got up from the floor and quickly walked back into the bedroom. Felicity rested her head back against the rim of the bathtub, making a pouty face. She had really thought Oliver wouldn’t be able to withstand her offer. Great! Now she needed to actually sit through talking baby names with him. She really had better ideas in mind about how to spend Valentine’s Day.

Felicity turned her eyes to the baby bump, slowly stroking her hands over it. “Don’t worry, Baby, I am not going to let daddy give you a crappy name.”

“I am going to give her a great name,” Oliver replied when he came back, something in her hand that she couldn’t exactly make out what it was.

“You will if you leave the decision up to me,” Felicity told him.

Oliver snorted. “No way.”

He sat back down at the floor next to the bathtub, facing her. His right hand moved through the water lazily for a moment before it settled against the bump, tracing their baby’s movements. Felicity enjoyed the warmth of his skin and put her hand to his, enlacing their fingers with a sigh.

“It was so much easier if we thought the baby was a boy,” Felicity said, watching their linked fingers on the bump. “I mean we would agree on a name in seconds.”

“Benjamin,” they both said at the same time and when their eyes met, they were both smiling.

“And Archer would be a nice middle name,” Felicity added, “with a hidden meaning only our friends and family would understand.”

“I would like that,” Oliver replied.

That was how a couple was supposed to find the perfect name for their baby, Felicity though, still smiling at Oliver. With boy names it was so easy for them, but when it came to girl names, it seemed like they were completely different people. They could discuss names for hours without finding one that they would both agree on. Well, and if they finally found a name they could both agree on, someone or something would came along and destroy it for them. That way the name Madeleine had been ruined for them three years ago when they had discussed baby names the last time. Well, speaking of Oliver’s forgotten ex-girlfriend-

“Did you attend to the task I gave you?” Felicity asked Oliver with strict voice.

“Absolutely,” Oliver replied seriously, lifting the book with baby names Felicity had given to him last week from the floor next to him. He held it out for her with a proud look on his face, promising, “I crossed out the name of every woman I ever slept with.”

“Are there names left in the book?” Felicity asked teasingly.

Oliver rolled his eyes. “Yes, there are.”

“Well, I guess I am going to check if you really didn’t forget any name before we get to the part of discussing names. I don’t want to settle on a name and then have to discard it again just because of your have a past full of women,” she told him, but winked to make sure he knew that she wasn’t angry. Well, maybe she was angry, but just a little. She had really liked the name Madeleine, and the fact that they couldn’t use it now bothered her at least a little.

She skimmed through the book shortly, seeing several pages canceled by a red pen. Humming lowly, she looked at Oliver over the edge of the book. He was watching her intently, one forearm put to the rim of the bathtub, his chin resting on top of it. She smiled at him for a moment before turning her attention back to the book.

“Let’s start with McKenna.”

“Not in the book,” Oliver told her.

“Fine, then I start with Isabel,” Felicity said with a smile and quickly skimmed through the pages until she found the page for Isabel. “Crossed out. Good for you, hon. Let’s check Samantha.”

Felicity proved two more names that she remembered. It seemed like Oliver had taken the task seriously. Well, at least that meant that they wouldn’t have the same problem like they had had the last time they had discussed baby names. She was just about to search for Helena’s name when her eyes fell on a page that wasn’t canceled.

“Are you freaking kidding me?” she asked, sitting up in the bathtub so quickly that she slid down a little bit and almost lost her balance. If it hadn’t been for Oliver’s arm quickly stabilizing her and giving her leverage, her head would have bumped back against the rim of the bathtub.

“Careful, Felicity,” he told her.

“Careful? Careful? You tell me to be careful?” Felicity asked, turning around in the bathtub, so she could look at him with angry eyes. She held the book out in front of his eyes. “What the hell is that?”

Oliver frowned and leaned back a little, so he could actually read the name on the page Felicity was holding out for him. “That’s your name.”

“Exactly,” Felicity replied with a hiss. “Why isn’t it canceled?”

“Because it’s your name?”

“And I am not a woman you had sex with or what?”

“Well, you don’t count.”

“I don’t- I don’t count?” Felicity asked. “You are so not ever getting sex again, Mister.”

Oliver rolled his eyes. “You know how I mean that.”

Felicity snorted, throwing the book against his chest. Oliver screwed up his face in pretended pain, rubbing his fingers over where the book had hit him. Felicity meanwhile leaned back in the bathtub, crossing her arms in front of her chest and puckering her lips.

He hadn’t canceled her from the list. Her of all people! Best sex of his life, and he had just forgotten about her! How dare he? And now she couldn’t trust the book anymore because if he had forgotten to cancel her name, who knew how many other names he had forgotten too?

When Oliver started playing with a strand of her hair, Felicity leaned away from him.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he whispered, accentuating each syllable.

“No, I am mad at you,” Felicity replied, continuing to stare in front of her.

“Let me make it up to you,” Oliver asked.

“You can’t,” Felicity simply responded, still refusing to look at him, “unless you want to let me decide about the name.”

“Yeah, not going to happen.”

“In that case you shouldn’t speak to me again until I find it in my heart to forgive you,” Felicity told him.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered in pleading tone.

“No, I am mad.”

“Felicity.”

“No, I wanna be mad at you right now,” Felicity said with a pouting voice that sounded suspiciously alike to Emmy’s voice when she didn’t get what she wanted. When Oliver continued to just stare at her, Felicity glanced at him shortly. “I am going to stay mad a little longer. You don’t need to wait around here for me to get over it.”

“Felicity.”

“No.”

Oliver leaned forward and brushed his lips to the spot right under her ear. “Felicity.”

“No.”

“Felicity.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. Oliver wasn’t playing fair. The pleading in his voice really wasn’t easy to resist. She puckered her lips, shaking her head, and Oliver dropped a kiss to her shoulder.

“Felicity.”

Biting down on her tongue and releasing a strained breath, Felicity glanced at Oliver shortly. His deep blue eyes were focused on her face, the pleading she had heard in his voice also visible in his eyes. He looked like a kicked puppy, begging to get back into its owner’s good graces. Felicity grumbled.

“Fine,” Felicity said, almost spitting the word out. “Let’s get this over with.”

Oliver kissed the side of her neck gently before he pressed his nose against her skin and moved it up her neck. He peppered a series of kisses along her jaw and over her cheek to the corner of her mouth. Felicity still wasn’t looking at him. When he nuzzled her cheekbone, though, she rolled her eyes and turned her face to him. Immediately Oliver’s lips pressed to hers. He kissed her gently at first, but it soon grew more heated, his tongue entering her mouth and stoking against her tongue.

“I love you,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted. His nose nuzzled hers for a short moment before he brushed his lips against hers once more. “I love you very much.”

Felicity only grumbled and leaned back in the bathtub again. She took in a deep breath, held the air in her lungs for five long seconds and then breathed out through her mouth very slowly.

“Okay, now we can start,” she said. “Suggest a name.”

“Brooklyn.”

“Hell, no,” Felicity replied. “We are not naming our baby after a place.”

Oliver nodded. “Okay, so it’s your turn.”

Felicity puckered her lips. She hadn’t put much thought into baby names yet. She was still hoping for a miracle that suggested a name they could both easily agree on or maybe for the baby to turn out to be a boy despite Oliver’s and her feeling that it was a girl. Talking names with Oliver was just so exhausting and tiring. She knew that eventually they needed to discuss them, though. Otherwise their baby was most likely going to be born without a name, at least if it was a girl like they both thought.

“How about Sadie?”

Oliver scrunched up his name. “Yeah… no. Juliette?”

“Don’t like that,” Felicity replied. “Maybe Haley?”

“That name was crossed out in the book,” Oliver mumbled.

Felicity rolled her eyes, sliding down on the bathtub until her face was under the water. She closed her eyes, shutting out everything around her for a moment. Why couldn’t discussing girls names be as easy as discussing boys names? It was the one part about pregnancy and having a baby that she really wasn’t looking forward to. With each baby it seemed to only get harder.

She wanted a baby boy, a baby boy named Benjamin Archer Queen. Yes, not so long ago she had said that she didn’t mind the fighting about a name when they could have a baby girl that wouldn’t grow up with any daddy issues. She was officially taking that back now. She wanted a baby boy now, one that grew up with a name they had easily found and that-

Oliver grabbed her forearms and pulled her back into an upright position, so her face was over the surface of the water. When Felicity looked at him with a frown, she saw the worry in his eyes.

“How long can you hold your breath?”

“Very long,” Felicity replied. “When I was a child, I always held my breath until I got what I wanted. It worked until my mom realized that I was really good at holding my breath without fainting. I spent a lot of time making sure I could hold my breath for a very long time.”

“Yeah, could you still please not do that?” Oliver asked, looking down at the water she was sitting in worriedly for a moment. Then her looked back at her, waiting for her reaction. Felicity pressed her lips together, nodding slowly. Oliver’s gaze stayed on her face, but the expression on it changed from serious to amused soon. “Your make-up isn’t waterproofed.”

“So?”

“I am not sure I can take you serious for the rest of the discussion,” Oliver told her with a chuckle.

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Give me make-up remover tissue then.”

Oliver brushed his lips against hers, his thumb stroking over her cheekbone gently, before he straightened up. He turned around and went to the cabinet. He opened one of the drawers.

“It’s in the one above that,” Felicity told him.

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed distantly, pulling a bottle from the drawer.

Felicity frowned. “What are you doing?”

“Checking what bath additive you are using,” Oliver told her.

Felicity’s frown deepened. “Why?”

“Because I like the scent of it,” Oliver replied. “I want to check the name and how much more of that we have, so I can buy a new bottle if it’s almost empty. How many bath additives do you have by the way?”

“A lot,” Felicity replied with a quiet chuckle. “Some people sent me gift baskets with all kind of bath supplies for Christmas.”

Oliver looked at her over his shoulder, frowning. “What people?”

“Partners.”

Oliver frowned. “I don’t like the thought that your partners think about you taking a bath. I am the only one supposed to think about that.”

Felicity rolled her eyes with a chuckle. “That is why I didn’t tell you I got those gifts. Besides, it was a little sexist they sent me cosmetic and wellness stuff like this, while I know from a trustful source that paperweights or other office stuff.”

“Do you want a paperweight?”

“I want to be treated like male CEOs are,” Felicity told him. “Just because I am a woman, I- You know, to shorten this, it’s the pink bath additive.”

“That one?” Oliver asked, pulling a bottle from the drawer.

“Yes.”

“Lovely Camille,” Oliver read out, holding the bottle in his right hand while his left hand already pulled one of the remover tissues from the drawer above.

When he turned back around to her, he looked at her with his head cocked and a question in his eyes that Felicity understood without the words being said.

“Camille,” she repeated.

“Camille,” Oliver said again, too.

He must have realized that she was just as interested in the name as he was because he quickly crossed the distance. Handing her the remover tissue, he kneeled back in front of the bathtub and put the bottle of bath additive on the floor next to him. Felicity quickly wiped the make-up off her face. Then she discarded the remover tissue on the floor carelessly and put her hands to Oliver, entwining their fingers. She leaned forward, her face only a breath away from Oliver’s.

“Okay, let’s think this through carefully,” Felicity told him. “Did you ever sleep with a girl named Camille?”

“No,” Oliver replied. Felicity narrowed her eyes at him, watching him thoroughly, and Oliver added firmly, “I swear.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “I believe you.”

“We should find a middle name, though,” Oliver stated. “I don’t think Grace works that well with Camille.”

“I am sure someone will come to our rescue during the birth anyway, so we can just use their name as a middle name,” Felicity responded a little dryly.

When she had been in labor with Emmy, Cupid had tried to cut the baby from her body and take her. Roy had saved them, and they had decided to make Harper Emmy’s middle name. Barry had saved Felicity when she had fallen down the stairs and Tommy had been born by C-section. Okay, they hadn’t named Tommy Bartholomew, but that was because Tommy already wore the name of his dad’s deceased best friend and the name of his deceased grandfather.

“I would appreciate if we could have a quiet birth without any trouble for once,” Oliver explained. “We already had two troublesome births. For this last baby it could really be all easy.”

“Well, let’s hope we are that lucky.”

Oliver squeezed her hand. “So what middle name should she have?”

“Well, talking about naming our child after people we love, I was wondering if you didn’t want to name her after your mother.”

“No,” Oliver replied immediately, shaking his head.

Felicity frowned. “Oh.”

“If it wasn’t for her, William would have been a part of my life from the beginning,” Oliver told her. “I don’t want our child to carry her name.”

His face was hard, barely leaving room for objection. Felicity pressed her lips together for a moment. She hadn’t exactly been a fan of Moira given how she had threatened her that Oliver would hate her if she told him about Thea’s biological father. Moira had made many mistakes, but she also had done some things right. Felicity moved her fingers over the deep wrinkles on Oliver’s forehead, ceasing them gently.

“She sacrificed herself, so Thea and you would live,” Felicity reminded him. “You wouldn’t be here with me if it wasn’t for her.”

“But-“

“I wasn’t a fan of your mother, but even I have to admit that everything she did, she did to protect her children,” Felicity explained in a whisper. “That is something I do admire her for.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, not saying a word. His thumb stroked over the knuckles of her hand.

“No.”

Felicity nodded. “Okay. I just wanted to offer it.”

“And I appreciate it, but-“

“I understand. Let’s just think about a different name,” Felicity told him and pecked his lips shortly. “How about Dearden?”

Oliver rolled his eyes. “Really?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “It includes your mother and Thea and all your family from your mother’s side, so why not?”

“I don’t know.”

“Camille Dearden Queen would have a nice ring to it.”

Oliver sighed, shrugging his shoulders. “Fine, I’m okay with Dearden only because I don’t want to prolong this and threaten that we really get into a fight after all.”

They looked at each other intently, holding their hands. Neither of them said a word while they were both thinking about what reasons there might be to not name their child like that. Felicity thought about it carefully, trying to go through every possible way they might regret choosing this name, but nothing came up. There was nothing standing in the way of them naming their baby like that.

Oliver must have come to the same conclusion. He was already leaning forward to kiss her. Felicity was about to meet him half-way when she suddenly pulled back.

“Oh no.”

“What?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows. “I am sure whatever problem there is we can solve it.”

“Not sure about that,” Felicity mumbled. “Remember Emmy’s friend Cami?”

Oliver frowned. “I’m not…”

“The one who compared us to Beauty and the beast because I look like a princess and your scars make you look like a monster?”

“So?” Oliver asked, shrugging his shoulders. “Emmy won’t remember her.”

“I remember her, and nobody calls my husband a beast,” Felicity said firmly. “Well, I sometimes call you a best, but that is always in relation to your skills in bed when you are all growly and-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her. “You are getting off track.”

Felicity cleared her throat. “Right. What I was meant to say is that I don’t want to be reminded of that girl whenever I call our daughter. Since against all odds we have both gotten used to calling them our children nicknames, it will probably end up being Cami, and then-“

“So we choose another nickname and call her that a lot to make sure that she won’t be called Cami,” Oliver told her. He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking thoroughly about what other possibilities the name offered, before he opened his eyes again. “How about Millie?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She loved nick names that ended on –y or –ie like it was with Tommy and Emmy already. Millie would fit into that perfectly.

“I would like that.”

“Yes?” Oliver asked.

She nodded. “Very much actually.”

Oliver started smiling and within only a couple of seconds her smile matched his. She felt butterflies in her stomach.

“Mrs. Queen,” Oliver started.

“Mr. Queen,” Felicity replied.

“I think we have a name for our baby.”

“I think we really do,” Felicity agreed.

When Oliver leaned in this time, Felicity met him half way. Their lips met in a gentle kiss full of joy. Their tongues danced with each other without any desire for dominance. One of Oliver’s hands moved into her hair, holding her to him. Felicity wrapped her arms around his shoulders tightly, pressing herself close to him. Slowly she turned around in the water, making Oliver slide into the bathtub with her. She rolled herself onto him, so she was sitting in his lap.

He chuckled. “What are you doing?”

“Showing my gratitude that we were able to agree on a name after all,” Felicity replied between a series of kisses to Oliver’s lips. “Besides, it is Valentine’s Day, and we didn’t get to properly celebrate this holiday for one ones in love yet. Or do you have any objections?”

“Oh, no,” Oliver replied, moving his hands from her hips upwards to her rips. “I love Valentine’s Day, and I also think that I deserve a lot of gratitude for finding the perfect name.”

Felicity pulled back, frowning at him. “You didn’t find the name.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow. “I wanted to know the name of the bath additive. We wouldn’t have found the name if I hadn’t looked for it.”

“But it’s my bath additive, so we wouldn’t have had it without me,” Felicity replied. “Hence, it’s actually me who found the name.”

They looked at each other challenging for a long moment, neither of them willing to completely give up the praise to the other. Felicity bit down on the inside of her cheek, thinking about a way to compromise.

“We found it together?” Oliver offered, obviously searching for a compromise himself.

Felicity smiled. “Together.”

Immediately their lips met again, neither of them willing to waste even a second. They kissed passionately, her need for him growing more with every moment. She sighed into the kiss, pressing herself closer to Oliver. Her hands were roaming over his chest, already moving down to the hem of his henley impatiently. Before she could take the fabric off of him, though, they broke the kiss.

Chuckling, Oliver put his hands to Felicity’s bump. “She is very active.”

“I think it’s her way of telling us that she agrees to her name.”

Oliver leaned down until his lips brushed against the naked skin of her stomach. He whispered, “Hi, darling. You know, I love it very much when you’re active, but I really want to have a little fun with mommy right now. It’s Valentine’s Day, and I want to properly celebrate that holiday with mommy. I’d really appreciate if you could hold a little still for the next hours. You can dance in there later.”

Immediately the baby held still. Felicity chuckled, shaking her head and moving her fingers through Oliver’s short hair. “She’s definitely a girl. They always listen to you.”

“Thank you very much for your help here,” Oliver said to the baby with a smile and pressed a kiss to the top of the bump. “I love you, Millie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... that are the names I have in mind right now. There might still be a slight change, but I am not sure yet. ;)


	182. Not as planned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I am sorry I didn’t post in a while. I was a little… I don’t know… 
> 
> Anyway, here is a new chapter. I should warn you that this chapter and the next two were written while I was sick, so they turned out different than planned. I was feeling lazy, so I couldn’t even bring myself to get the characters into much action. I hope you will enjoy this nonetheless. :)

“Eight more minutes, Mr. Queen.”

“Yes, thanks,” Oliver replied, but the door had already fallen shut again.

Sighing, Oliver leaned back in the chair and closed his eyes while his thumb was nervously rubbing against the tips of the other fingers of the same hand. It was a nervous tick he hadn’t even noticed before Felicity had pointed it out to him early in their relationship. She just knew him like that, and Oliver was glad about it.

He knew that this was his childhood dream coming true once more. A little more than three years ago it had come true already when he had been given the chance to participate in a wrestling match for the first time. Joining in on something like that had been something he had always wanted to do. When he had been eight years old, he had barely talked about anything else than that. It wasn’t until his parents had pointed out that maybe there were other things he should focus on that he had buried that dream deep in his heart.

When he had been asked to participate in a wrestling match three years ago then, he had thought it was the right time to dig that dream out from the deep corner of his heart that it had been buried in and finally make it come true. That had been the plan. He had participated in that match, and it really had been great. It had been fun. He had been very excited about it, and it had turned out to be even cooler than he could have imagined.

It hadn’t been his dream coming true, though, because just like people dreams could change. Oliver had changed a lot since he had been seven. He hadn’t only grown up but been through several changes that had made him the man he was now. That man might still dream about participating in a wrestling match, but that alone just wasn’t enough for him anymore. He wanted more.

Oliver looked at the wedding band on his left finger. He knew he had to take it off for the match. He wished he could take it with him, but the danger that it was going to slip out of his pocket during the fight was too high. Sighing, he started spinning the ring around his finger, another one of his nervous ticks.

He knew it wasn’t the same as it had been three years ago when he had taken part in a wrestling match the first time, but it also wasn’t the dream he had now come true. If this was his dream come true, he would have Felicity by his side. She had been an existential part of his life, and he knew that his childhood dream now included her. She had to be part of it, and that made it a new dream, one that wouldn’t come true today.

Oliver sighed, moving his hand through his short hair. He really knew this wasn’t like it had been the last time when Felicity had been depressive and unable to support him. She was supporting him now. She had encouraged him from the second he had told her about the offer to join in on another wrestling match. She just wasn’t here and that sucked.

When his phone beeped, he only shot a quick look at the display before he took the call.

“Hi, babe,” he said with a smile. “I was just thinking about you.”

“I just wanted to call you to wish you the best of luck,” Felicity replied, a smile audible in her voice. “I know you don’t need it because you will be doing great, but a little luck never hurts, right?”

“Right,” Oliver replied with a smile. He looked down at his wedding band and sighed quietly. “Are you okay?”

“I’m great,” Felicity was quick to respond. “John just picked up the kids and moved the couch a little. That way I can elevate my feet and still have perfect view on the TV. I just got comfortable here with a bottle of water and a bucket of popcorn. Oh, and if the firm kicks are any indication, I think your daughter is cheering for you too. She might be maltreating my insides doing so, but I can take it.”

Oliver smiled about her rambling, closing his eyes with a sigh. He could almost picture her lying on the couch in their living room with her feet resting on a pile of pillows. Her hand would lazily stroke over the bump, her fingers tracing their baby’s movements.

“I wish you were here,” Oliver admitted with a low sigh.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t make it.”

Oliver smiled, huffing out a laugh. “As far as I remember, I was the one telling you to stay home, Dr. Hampton and I to be exact.”

“Still,” Felicity said in a whisper before the both of them fell silent.

It had started in the middle of the past week. Felicity had come home from work with her shoes in her hand. She had given up on high heels several weeks ago, but she had never come home barefoot. When he had asked her about it, she had told him that the shoes were feeling tight and she taken them off because it had started hurting. One look at her feet – feet that Felicity herself couldn’t see anymore because the bump was in the way – and Oliver had seen the swellings of her feet and ankles. He had prepared a footbath for her that had helped a little but unfortunately not for long.

Two nights later she had whispered his name. First he had just subconsciously noticed and tightened her arm around her and pulled her closer towards him. She had said his name again with urgent voice and had lightly shaken his shoulder, though. He had been wide awake immediately, worried that something was wrong. Felicity had told him that her hand hurt badly, so he had switched on the light and take a look at her hand, finding it just as swollen as her feet and ankles.

She had told him that her hand was really hurting badly and that she needed to take the rings off, but she couldn’t do it because they seemed to be stuck on her fingers. Oliver had taken her to the bathroom and used a lot of water, soap and gentle force to get them off her fingers. Felicity had sighed in relief, a single tear slipping from her eyes. He had asked if he should take her to the hospital, but she had replied that that probably wasn’t necessary.

He had convinced her to take her to her doctor the next day then, though. Dr. Hampton had taken a thorough look at her. Apparently Felicity had edema which meant that excess fluids were collecting in her tissue. Dr. Hampton had explained to them that it was normal and nothing to be worried about as long as certain warning signs didn’t occur. Oliver had let himself be informed about those warning signs carefully to make sure he wouldn’t miss anything, but apart from the swellings and other normal issues late in the pregnancy Felicity really seemed fine.

The problem was that there wasn’t much they could do about the swelling itself. It would increase in the first days after birth but decrease in the two weeks after. All they could do for now was to make it a little more bearable. That meant that Felicity should avoid standing for too long. Instead she should elevate her feet whenever possible, drink a lot of water and do some simple stretch exercises. He also massaged her feet every day which he had done before the edema already. Then there were a few other things to make her feel more comfortable, but they wouldn’t exactly cure the edemas.

That was why he had told Felicity to stay home instead of coming here and watching the match from the stands. She would have to either stand or sit with her legs bent. It wouldn’t be good for her swellings. Of course he was putting her health before everything. There wasn’t even a question about it. He’d still appreciate if she was able to be here with him.

“I need to go out now,” Oliver said with a sigh.

“I love you, and I know you are going to be great,” Felicity replied, and he could hear the smile in her voice. “Millie and I will watch from our comfortable first row seats and cheer for you even if you can’t hear us.”

“I’ll keep that in mind during the match.”

He smiled about the fact how effortlessly they had starting calling their baby Millie though they still didn’t really know that they were having another girl. They both had a strong feeling about it, but that didn’t mean that they were necessarily having a girl. At least there was this tiny chance of maybe one percent that their feeling was wrong, and they would end up having a baby boy. For now they trusted their feeling, though.

“Good,” Felicity replied. “And when you’re back home, I am sure that Millie will be fast asleep which means that I can properly show you how much I enjoyed the show, and by ‘properly show you how much I enjoyed the show’ I mean hot, rough, phenomenal sex.”

Oliver chuckled. “Good to know. I am looking forward to it.”

“You can,” Felicity promised. She made a short pause before she added, “I love you.”

“I love you too. See you later, hon.”

Oliver hung up and put his phone away. Sighing, he lifted his left hand to his lips and kissed his wedding band before taking it off. He put it on top of his phone and pushed his phone more into the middle of the small table.

Maybe this wasn’t going the way he had planned it, but it was at least close it, wasn’t it? She might not be here and watch from the stands, but she was watching from their home. She was supporting this, and she was happy for him. She enjoyed this as much as he did. This was his dream, wasn’t it? Everything else was just details.

 

 

Felicity put her phone to the couch table and grabbed her glass of water instead, taking some sips. As soon as Oliver was announced, she quickly put the glass back and stroked both of her hands over the baby bump.

“Millie, daddy’s coming,” Felicity told her yet unborn baby. She had been hesitant about calling the baby by the girl’s name they had settled on already, but if she and Oliver both believed the baby was a girl, then that was probably true.

She focused her eyes on the TV and smiled when Oliver came out from the backstage area and into the arena. He was hot as hell with the tight sports pants and bare chest. When he had participated in his first match three years ago, he had worn a muscle shirt to hide the marks of the torture that his body carried. Since then photos of Oliver at the beach had leaked, though, and there was no point in hiding those scars anymore. Everyone knew about it anyway. Well, at least that made it possible for her to admire his hot body right now.

She licked her lips, intensely watching how Oliver walked towards the ring. He jumped over the rope effortlessly, making the crowd cheer. Felicity only chuckled, moving her hand over the bump.

“Your daddy is a bragger from time to time, but that’s okay because he is super hot.” When the baby kicked her firmly, Felicity chuckled. “I know, I know. Kids don’t want to hear about such things. Well, at least most kids don’t. When you meet your older sister, you will soon notice that she doesn’t have problems with that at all. She loves how much mommy and daddy love each other.”

Continuing to stroke her hand over her bump, Felicity turned onto her side, getting an even better look at the TV. Oliver and The Flash, his opponent in this wrestling match, stood opposite of each other while the referee explained some things to them. Meanwhile, in a small part of the screen, snippets of their last two matches were shown.

“This is going to be so good,” Felicity said with a yawn. “Daddy’s going to be so amazing, and I need to properly show him when he comes home. So how about a deal? You go to sleep after this match and I owe you one for that? Do we have a deal?”

When the baby kicked against her hand, Felicity closed her eyes for a moment and enjoyed the feeling. She was definitely sure that the baby was a girl. She really had a feeling about that deep in her bones. She could already picture the little girl with blonde curls like Emmy and deep blue eyes like Tommy. She might be just as demanding as Emmy or maybe just as moody as Tommy, or maybe she wouldn’t be like her older siblings at all.

A small sigh escaped Felicity. She wanted to keep her eyes closed just a moment longer, so she could keep picturing the little baby girl growing inside of her. It was comfortable like this, really comfortable. She had planned on taking a nap earlier today, but Tommy hadn’t been in the mood to let his mommy sleep.

“Just one second longer,” she whispered to herself, falling asleep with another quiet sigh.

 

 

As soon as Oliver had unlocked the door, he dropped his bag to the floor and kicked the door shut behind him. He rolled his shoulders, taking a nosy look into his home. He would have bet that Felicity was going to jump him right at the door. Well, not literally jump of course because with her swollen ankles and feet and the heavy baby bump she certainly wouldn’t be able to easily jump him anymore. Anyway, he had really expected her to welcome him back home at the door.

Oliver considered walking right upstairs to see if maybe Felicity was waiting for him in bed. Sometimes she did that. When he had still been working and had come home late from a business trip, she had sometimes waited for him in bed. She had only worn sexy lingerie or maybe even nothing at all then.

He was already about to head upstairs when he heard voices from the living room. Frowning – please, Felicity, don’t have people here tonight! – he went towards the living room. The TV was still switched on, some old wrestling matches airing that explained the voice he had heard. Felicity was lying on the couch, her feet elevated on some pillows, her head snuggled into the crook of her arm. One hand was resting on her stomach, her fingers slightly moving on her bump.

Oliver tiptoed towards the couch and kneeled down in front of Felicity’s head. He sat back down on his heels, fighting the urge to touch her. Felicity looked so relax and so at peace right now, his fingers itched with the need to touch her. He didn’t want to wake her, though. He knew that late in the pregnancy sleep wasn’t coming easy for her. The baby wasn’t exactly adjusting to Felicity’s sleeping rhythm. Instead the little girl loved to maltreat Felicity’s bladder, especially during the night. He knew Felicity couldn’t wait for the last four weeks of pregnancy to pass.

He put his hand against the belly, gently stroking his thumb over the swell of Felicity’s stomach through her shirt. His smile widened when Felicity’s hand moved to his, her fingers lacing through his. She stirred slightly in her sleep like she was about to wake up, so Oliver pressed his lips against her forehead. Felicity sighed, mumbling his name.

“Oliver.”

“Yes, I am here,” Oliver whispered back, smiling at her. He was about to whisper something more when he felt the movement against the palm of his hand. He turned his gaze to his hand on Felicity’s stomach and smiled. “Mommy said you should be asleep when I come home.”

Millie only kicked against his hand firmly, making him chuckle lowly. She was probably another rebel in the family. He didn’t mind. He liked putting up with strong-headed women. He had married one.

Oliver pressed a kiss to the swell of Felicity’s stomach. “It’s nice you stayed up to welcome me home. I appreciate it.”

Oliver switched off the TV and lifted Felicity into his arms. Her head came to rest against his shoulder with a sigh. Oliver smiled and pressed a kiss to her temple while he was already carrying her upstairs. In the bedroom he lay her down on the mattress, quickly got out of his own clothes, crawled into bed and snuggled up to her. He watched her for a long moment, enjoying the sight of her sleeping so peacefully. Only then did close his eyes and tried sleeping too.

 

 

With a little sigh Felicity snuggled more against Oliver’s warm body, enlacing her fingers with his on the swell of her stomach. She missed having him sleeping on top of her with his head resting on top her breasts, so he could listen to the beating of her heart. Feeling Oliver’s weight on top of her and his stubble scratching her skin had something comforting that reached her even when she was fast asleep. This was quite comfortable too, though.

She was about to fall back asleep when suddenly a thought flashed through her mind. Her eyes snapped open with a gasp for breath. Immediately Oliver tensed behind her.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” Felicity whispered, peppering kisses all over his face. “I just wanted to keep my eyes closed for five seconds and…  I am so sorry.”

She pressed a long kiss to his lips, framing his face with her hands. Her thumbs grazed Oliver’s dimples, telling her that he was smiling. Sighing, she broke the kiss and nuzzled her nose with his.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Oliver whispered back, stroking his hands over her belly and back. “Maybe things didn’t go the way we planned, but the last hours were still great. I came home to my very pregnant wife sleeping on the couch with my name falling from her lips. Then I got to carry her into our bedroom and cuddle with her all night only to be woken by her peppering my face with kisses.”

“I was supposed to welcome you home with sex,” Felicity said with a sigh. “I was so bored a few days ago, I searched the web for good positions during pregnancy, and I even found one that is called _Queen taking a seat_. I felt that was a sign.”

“Tell me more,” Oliver suggested, chastely kissing her lips.

“Well, you would sit in an armchair and I would sit in your lap with my back turned towards you, and we would just move together.”

Oliver smiled against her neck and kissed her pulse point. “Wouldn’t be good with the edema, don’t you think?”

Felicity chuckled. “You’re probably the only man who would think about that when his wife suggests sex.”

“Well, I might keep your health in mind, but that doesn’t mean that I turn down the offer of sex,” Oliver replied. He pecked her lips shortly before he turned her around, turning her back towards him. His lips moved to her ear. “I would never turn down sex.”

“I hope you know that the match that was probably very hot calls for rough sex,” Felicity replied, sighing contently when Oliver sucked at her neck. “Not that I am exactly complaining about this.”

Oliver chuckled. “The internet says it’s better for you to lie on your left side.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, shaking her head. The next moment a moan escaped her, though, when Oliver cupped her breast while his hips pushed against hers.

“I think the fact that we do this in the middle of the night and you are very pregnant with some very normal pregnancy issues calls for very gentle and lazy sex,” Oliver whispered against the curve of her neck and shoulder before he pressed his lips down there to a kiss. His hips kept moving against hers. His hand gently squeezed her breast, careful not to hurt her because he knew how sensitive her breasts were when she was pregnant. “Can we agree on that?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She had imaged wild, rough sex for tonight, but admittedly she didn’t mind being lazy either. She nodded. “Okay.”

“Good,” Oliver mumbled before he started peppering a path of kisses from Felicity’s shoulder to her ear. “I love you, Felicity.”

“I love you too,” Felicity replied, her hips moving against his slowly.

They moved in unison without saying anything for a while. Oliver’s lips kept kissing whatever skin of hers he could reach. His hand moved from her breast down to her hips and snuck under the hem of her top. Immediately Felicity’s fingers laced with his on her belly. She sighed contently, feeling herself growing wetter while Oliver hardened against her butt.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity whispered when the heat that was forming in her stomach grew tighter.

Oliver didn’t hesitate. He moved his hand down to the waistband of Felicity’s sweatpants and tugged them down together with her panties until the fabric pooled around her knees. He then quickly lowered his own pants. When his hips thrust against hers the next time, his hot erection moved through her wet folds.

Felicity moaned. She turned her head and put her hand to the back of Oliver’s hand, pulling him closer to her. Their lips met in a passionate yet very gentle kiss. Their tongues moved against each other’s lazily. Felicity sighed into the kiss. The sensation of the kiss and Oliver’s hard length moving between her wet folds was made her stomach tighten and lust increasing.

“I need you,” Felicity whispered against his lips before kissing him once more.

Oliver took hold of his cock and nudged the tip between Felicity’s folds until he found her entrance. He gently bit down on her bottom lip before he pulled just far enough away, so he could lock eyes with her. He pushed his arm under her head, so she could use his bicep as a pillow. Her hand grabbed his and squeezed when Oliver slowly moved his hip forward, pushing himself inside of her.

Felicity released a long breath, kissing the back of Oliver’s hand. The position didn’t allow for very deep penetration, but feeling Oliver’s strong, warm body pressed against her back definitely made up for that. Their lips met in another kiss when their hips started moving in union.

They set a slow, almost lazy pace. Oliver moved his hand from her hip back to the baby bump. Felicity moved her hand to his hip, encouraging his movements. Oliver’s thrust grew a little harder.

“Good?” he asked.

Felicity nodded. “Very good.”

She turned her head, kissing down Oliver’s arm. Oliver’s lips took a path down her neck in the meantime. His kissed and nibbled her skin while his hips continued with the slow but hard thrusts. His hand that still rested on her belly slowly moved up, stroking the round curve. When he reached the top of the bump, though, his fingers formed to a fist, and Felicity felt the necklace she was wearing slightly biting into the flesh at the back of her neck.

The last days that she hadn’t been able to wear the rings because of her swollen fingers she had felt terribly naked. For years those rings had been on her fingers. She had only taken them off when she had been in surgery for Tommy’s c-section or when she had been abducted and Foster had taken the rings from her. Otherwise she couldn’t remember that she had ever taken them off. That was why she had rummaged around in her jewelries until she had found a necklace that was long enough, so the rings would rest between her breasts, close to her heart.

“Couldn’t be without them,” Felicity whispered, panting slightly. “I wanted to carry them, and it felt right to have them close to my heart.”

Her hand moved from Oliver’s hip to his hand under her top. She squeezed his fist, holding onto it, while the tension slowly started coiling in her stomach more and more. Oliver nudged her jaw with his nose, and as soon as Felicity turned her head, he crushed his lips to hers in a bruising kiss. Oliver thrust into her harder and more quickly now. Felicity moaned.

Their kiss soon got sloppy, their movements rather uncoordinated. They fell over the edge together, still moving in synch to prolong their ecstasy. Felicity felt her entire body filling with warmth and contentment. For several minutes their lips just brushed against each other’s rather than really kissing. Only when they came both back down from their highs of pleasure, their lips met in a gentle kiss again.

“This was great,” Felicity whispered, stroking her hand over Oliver’s cheek to enjoy the tickling of his stubble against her skin.

“It was perfect,” Oliver corrected with a smile. “The whole evening was perfect.”

“Well, if you ever manage to take part in a match when I am not pregnant, I am sure I could top this evening,” Felicity replied and kissed him.

Oliver chuckled, resting his forehead against the back of her head. “Maybe one day I will.”


	183. Time for family

Felicity had just stepped out of the garage when the front door opened already. Immediately Tommy came running towards her in his green pajamas and hugged her leg, pressing his head against the side of the baby bump. Smiling, Felicity stroked her hand over her son’s dark hair.

“Hi, buddy,” she greeted him. “Were you waiting for mommy to come home?”

“Yes,” Tommy replied. He took a step back and held his arms out for her. “Mama, arm!”

Felicity took his hands in hers and bent down to kiss his lips gently. “You know that mommy can’t lift you from the floor right now. She already carries your little sibling.”

Tommy made a pouting face, and Felicity smiled at that. She knew that Tommy didn’t exactly like that he couldn’t cuddle his mommy the way he used to before her belly had started growing. Since she hadn’t been able to lift him into her arms any longer, it had only getting worse for him. Felicity hoped it would get easier for him once the baby was being born.

“Come on, Tommy,” Felicity said, nodding her head to the house. “Let’s get inside and cuddle on the couch, okay?”

“Okay,” Tommy replied, immediately tugging at Felicity’s hand to make her come inside.

Felicity chuckled at his eagerness. Tommy could be an even bigger cuddler than Oliver at times. That was why she wasn’t surprised at all that Tommy didn’t give her the time to properly shut the door, and Felicity had to kick it closed behind her instead. As soon as they were in the living room, he made her sit down on the couch and crawled onto her lap, wrapping his small arms around her waist as far as the baby bump allowed him to and pressing his face to her chest. Felicity put her arms around him tightly and slowly rocked him from side to side.

“Are you tired?” she asked him quietly.

Tommy only nodded his head against her breast, so Felicity tightened her arms around him and kissed the top of his head. Her hand moved up and down her son’s back comfortingly. At the meantime she slipped out of her tight shoes, so she could elevate her feet. She knew she had been standing too much today. She couldn’t see her feet, but she knew they were swollen badly. Once they rested on the slightly higher armrest on the other end of the couch, Felicity sighed and leaned back, closing her eyes.

She could fall asleep just like this. Her feet were aching, less because of the water collecting in her tissue and more because of the long days she had had at work. Her back hurt like hell because with only three weeks to the due date the additional weight she was carrying in front her was growing quite heavy. Work was exhausting, and all she wanted to do now was sleeping. Tommy’s comfortable weight on top of her would make it so easy to just drift off.

When a comfortable prickling started in her neck and spread down the length of her spine, Felicity smiled. Not opening her eyes, she asked, “How long are you intending to stand there, Oliver?”

Oliver chuckled. “Just three seconds longer.”

Felicity smiled before she opened her eyes with a sigh. Oliver leaned in the doorframe, his arms crossed in front of his broad chest. He was smiling at her, his eyes shining with content. When he looked down at Tommy, Felicity followed his gaze, discovering that their son had already fallen asleep. She looked back at Oliver, and he smiled back at her.

“Where’s Emmy?” Felicity asked.

“She should come downstairs any second,” Oliver replied, approaching her. “Should I take Tommy?”

“No, I like it like this,” Felicity replied, leaning her cheek against Tommy’s head.

“Not too heavy?”

“No, it’s fine.”

Smiling, Oliver sat down at the other end of the couch, put a few pillows on his thighs and lifted her feet onto them. Without any hesitation he started massaging them, applying just the right pressure. He often massaged her feet, even more often when she was pregnant. Since the edema had started, he had made it his daily mission to massage her feet as soon as she came home. Felicity didn’t complain.

“How was your day?” Oliver asked.

“Exhausting,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “I feel like there is still so much work I need to do before I start my parental leave, and it seems like-“

“Daddy, when does mommy-?”

“Pst,” Oliver quickly hushed Emmy, turning his head towards her and putting his forefinger to his lips to make her know that she should be quiet.

Emmy leaned her head to the side, seeing Tommy sleeping. She smiled. “He’s still so cute.”

“Yes, he is,” Oliver replied. “And mommy’s home.”

“Hi, Mommy,” Emmy whispered. She quickly ran over to her mom, put a hand to her forehead and kissed her lips. “Can I cuddle with you too?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied with a smile, “but I think you need to climb over the back of the couch. Can you do that?”

Emmy rolled her eyes, replying, “I am not a baby, Mama.”

“Oh, I am very sorry then,” Felicity replied, chuckling.

When Emmy was about to walk past Oliver, he reached out his arm and wrapped it around Emmy’s waist, pulling her close until her ear was right at his lips. He whispered something into her ear that Felicity couldn’t understand, but Emmy pressed her lips together and nodded. She mumbled “Sorry” before she continued her way around the couch and climbed over the back of it. She snuggled up to Felicity’s side, resting her head on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Mommy,” Emmy whispered, quickly glancing at Oliver, who winked at her.

Felicity smiled and kissed her daughter’s forehead. “It’s okay. I know you are a big girl.”

“I am,” Emmy replied with a proud smile. She put a hand to her brother’s back and stroked it gently. “Tommy’s sleeping already.”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, he is. How about you? Are you tired?”

“No,” Emmy responded with a yawn, “I’m not.”

“Well, that’s good,” Felicity said with a smile.

Emmy snuggled her head more against her mother’s shoulder, and Felicity kissed her daughter’s forehead once more. She watched Emmy’s eyes slowly falling shut. She was fighting it, rubbing her eyes. It wasn’t long until her eyes stayed shut and her breathing evened out.

Felicity chuckled, looking at Oliver. “What did you do with them today?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “We might have put the last details to the nursery.”

“Oh, you should have told me that before,” Felicity said. “I would have taken a look to admire your work.”

“There’s enough time for that later,” Oliver replied with a smile. He moved his thumbs from her heel up to the ball of her foot and Felicity moaned quietly. “Did you think about your parental leave yet? We talked about it awhile ago, but there haven’t been any plans back then. It’s only a few more weeks until-“

“Next week is my last week,” Felicity interrupted him with a smile. “I know I should have probably stopped working already, but I-“

“No, it’s fine,” Oliver was now the one interrupting her. “I know you love your work, and I am happy for that. I just don’t want you to exhaust yourself. I am sure the company will do fine without you for a couple of weeks. Besides, you are only one phone call away in case any problem might occur.”

Felicity smiled. She knew Oliver understood her. She was happily looking forward to having this baby and spending time home, not working. She loved her family, and she loved being with them. She wanted to be here like 24/7 during the first weeks of their baby’s life. It was just that she also loved her work very much, and she hated not being around to control things. She was glad that Oliver understood because she knew that some people, especially other mothers, didn’t seem to get that.

“How long are you planning on staying away from work?” Oliver asked.

“For now Curtis and I have agreed on two months,” Felicity replied. “He will handle everything as long as I won’t work. If there is anything importing coming up like papers to sign or huge decisions to make I told him to just step by. He will also report me regularly, so I will know what’s going on. The project with Wayne Enterprise is running smoothly, though, so actually everything should be alright. I know it’s only two months, so I will only be around in the first six months of Millie’s life, but-“

“Hey,” Oliver interrupted her babbling, squeezing her foot. “Six weeks is totally fine.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She had only started working again when Tommy had been five months old. She had been here almost all the time when Emmy and Tommy of them had been younger. She knew it was stupid, but she did have some kind of guilty conscience about not taking the same time for Millie or Benjamin if the baby turned out to be a boy against all odds. She loved being a working mom because she felt like she was setting an example, and she knew her family worked perfectly. Oliver preferred being home with the kids anyway, and Felicity liked working. Technology was a huge part of her life. She didn’t feel guilty about that. She just-

“Hey,” Oliver pulled her from her thoughts gently. When Felicity looked at him, she saw him frowning slightly and shaking his head. “You have no reason to feel guilty. You have a brilliant mind that has the power to invent things that might change the world. You shouldn’t feel guilty for using that brain. Besides, you have a pretty amazing husband who loves taking care of the kids. He is even that great that he will stop by your office every day to make sure you have a daily dose of fun with the kids during your working hours. How does that sound?”

“Like I was smart enough to marry the perfect man?”

“Was that a question?” Oliver asked with a smile, cocking his head.

Felicity chuckled. “No, I know that I was smart enough to marry the perfect man.”

“Good,” Oliver replied and lifted her foot to his lips, kissing her toes, “because there shouldn’t be any question about that.”

“I think I will try my best to limit my working hours a little bit, though,” Felicity explained. “If I keep working these crazily long hours, I will only see our baby sleeping.”

“Hey, if she is at last half as exhausting as Emmy and Tommy were, I am sure you will have no trouble meeting her when she is awake.”

Felicity groaned. “Oh my god, don’t remind me! Even thinking about the exhaustion of the first months with these two monsters should have been enough to not have another baby.”

“A little late for that realization, don’t you think?”

“You know, if Millie turns out to be really exhausting, I will just go back to work early and leave her to you until she gets less exhausting,” Felicity said, winking at him.

Oliver chuckled. “Everything you want, hon.”


	184. Like Superman

Sighing, Felicity stepped out of the shower. She could have stayed under the stream of water for at least an hour longer, enjoying the prickling of the slightly too hot water on her skin. Since she knew that doing so would mess with the plans of celebrating her first evening in parental leave, though, she had to cut the relaxing shower short.

She glanced at her towel for only a split second before she bit down on her bottom lip and grabbed Oliver’s instead. His towel was bigger than hers. While usually she felt like she was drowning in the fluffy fabric of his towel, with the huge baby bump now it seemed to be just the perfect size for her. She dried her body as much as possible before she wrapped herself into the towel, quickly tied up her wet hair and left the steamy bathroom.

“Hey, I was just about to check if you got lost in the- Hey, is that my towel?” Oliver interrupted himself, frowning.

Felicity smiled innocently and rubbed her hand over the bump. “You know, Millie and I need a bigger towel as long as we shower together.”

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest, shaking his head. The slightest of a smile shone through the serious expression on his face, but he did his best to hide it. “Felicity, it’s not okay that you are using my towel.”

Sighing, Felicity took the damp towel off and threw it at him. She didn’t miss the way Oliver’s eyes darkened at the view of her standing in front of him naked. His tongue darted out to wet his lips while his gaze was lowering, taking in all her body.

Felicity chuckled, turning around to the commode and opening the drawer with her underwear. “Don’t even think about it, Oliver. The kids are downstairs and probably waiting for us already.”

Oliver groaned quietly, not hiding his discontent about Felicity’s words. Felicity looked back at him over her shoulder. Oliver puckered his lips and went over to the bed, sitting down on the edge. Felicity turned back around, watching in the mirror how Oliver kept eying her up while she was putting on her underwear.

Ignoring the goosebumps that spread on her back, Felicity grabbed her bottle of body lotion. She turned around and threw it to Oliver, saying, “Make yourself useful and help me to put on some lotion.”

“Everything you say, Mrs. Queen,” Oliver replied. He slid more onto the mattress, leaning his back against the headboard of the bed, and spread his legs. Patting the empty mattress between his legs, he prompted, “Come here.”

With a wide smile on her face Felicity sat down in front of him and leaned her back against his chest. She rested her head on his shoulder and moved her hands up and down the outside of his thighs. When Oliver gently kissed the juncture of her neck and shoulder, she sighed, closing her eyes.

“How was your last day at work?” Oliver asked.

Felicity watched him applying some of the body lotion to his hands before he rested the palms on the swell of her stomach and started gently working the lotion in. His hands moved slowly, stroking over each inch of skin of her body. When Millie started kicking against his palms, Oliver rested his chin on Felicity’s shoulder and smiled against the side of her neck.

“It was good,” she finally answered.

“Do you miss your work already?”

“No,” Felicity replied, opening her eyes and shooting Oliver a smile. “Maybe I will later during my leave, but for now I am very much looking forward to spending the next weeks solely with you guys. And I can’t wait to meet this little nugget here.”

“Only two more weeks,” Oliver replied, “which brings me to our wedding anniversary by the way.”

“And here I thought you might have forgotten with how close we are to Millie’s birth.”

Oliver smiled against the side of her neck, shaking his head. “Never.”

Of course he hadn’t forgotten. The fact that their baby was supposed to be born three days after their anniversary didn’t stop him from thinking about how to celebrate this new milestone in their marriage. Felicity smiled at that.

“So what do you think about it?”

“Well, I talked to your mother,” Oliver started, “and she will take Emmy and Tommy that day.”

“Sounds good,” Felicity replied with a smile.

“I figured we could spend a lazy day in bed,” Oliver continued, moving his hand a little lower on her stomach, but Felicity stopped his fingers before they could drift to low. Chuckling, Oliver kissed the soft skin right under her ear. “I could massage your feet – how are they today by the way?”

Felicity looked down at her swollen feet, shrugging his shoulders. “No changes.”

“At least the edemas are not getting worse, right?”

“I guess that is the only positive way to see it.”

Oliver kissed her shoulder. “Not long and you have your body all for yourself again.”

“As much as I love being pregnant,” Felicity replied, “I can’t wait.”

“Maybe we could go and grab some dinner at the end of the day?”

“Sounds great.”

Felicity turned her head, and their lips met in a chaste kiss. When she rested her head back against his shoulder and closed her eyes with a sigh, silence settled. It was a perfectly comfortable moment and Felicity knew she couldn’t be more content than she was right now. Oliver applied some more body lotion to his hands and massaged it into the skin of her chest, shoulders and arms.

“Can you believe it’s been almost six years now?” Felicity asked.

Oliver peppered some kisses to her shoulder, smiling against her skin. “It’s unbelievable.”

Opening her eyes, Felicity turned her head and smiled at him. “I know we had some rough times, but most of them were good, right?”

“More than good actually,” Oliver replied and kissed the tip of her nose.

“Definitely more than good,” Felicity agreed with a nod of her head. Oliver’s hands now moved down her legs, putting lotion to them. Felicity snuggled closer to him. “I could just sleep like this.”

“That would be a shame because you would miss the delicious pizza I ordered.”

Felicity hummed. “I get spoilt with unhealthy food.”

“Just because it was your last day at work,” Oliver replied and kissed her cheek. “You should get dressed because I don’t see any necessity that the delivery guy should figure out what underwear you are wearing.”

Chuckling, Felicity got out of bed. She slipped into some comfy sweatpants, a pair of fluffy socks and put on one of Oliver’s hoodies. Even his wide clothes were spanning around the bump. Once she was dressed, she held out her hand for Oliver. He enlaced their fingers, following her outside.

“Are the kids downstairs?” Felicity asked while they strolled through the hallway.

Oliver nodded. “Yes. William reads Emmy and Tommy a story.”

Felicity chuckled. “It’s the third story he has to read to them since he came here this afternoon. If they continue like that, he won’t have a voice until-“

“Watch out!”

Felicity felt her fluffy sock slipping on the wooden floor. Terrible memories of the night she had fallen down the stairs and almost lost Tommy if it hadn’t been for Barry carrying her to the hospital with super-speed, so the doctors had been able to perform an emergency c-section, flashed through her mind. Before she could even reach out her hand to grab the banister, though, she felt Oliver’s strong arms circling her waist, crushing him to his strong body. For a split second she thought he was holding her upright, but when she figured that he was falling too. She had no idea how he did it, but he managed to turn them, so it was his back that hit the steps. She was safely encaged in his arms, held tightly against his chest while they were falling down the entire set of stairs.

Once they came to a halt on the floor at the foot of the stairs, Oliver groaned. Felicity tried to prop herself up onto her forearms to get a look at him. Oliver still held her so tightly against him, though, that she was unable to move.

Felicity heard quick steps coming closer before William asked worriedly, “Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied between gritted teeth. “Everything’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” Felicity asked with just as much concern in her voice as there had been in William’s. She finally got to move and rolled off of Oliver, sitting down on the floor next to him. “You just fell down the stairs.”

“No, you fell down the stairs,” Oliver replied. “I just saved you. Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, slightly breathless. “But are you sure you’re alright because-“

Groaning, Oliver sat up and straightened his shoulders. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, waiting for his answer.

“Should I get some cool packs?” William asked.

“Not necessary, thanks,” Oliver replied. “I am absolutely fine.”

“Are you sure? I think you need-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her and took her hand, squeezing gently. “The only thing I need is that you stay away from stairs. Let me just carry you up and down the stairs from now on, okay? We don’t want to risk anything in these last two weeks, do we?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip for a moment. “Are you sure?”

“Oh, I have never felt surer of anything,” Oliver replied. He groaned once more, getting up from the floor. Then he held out his hands for Felicity and helped her onto her feet. He moved his hands over her back gently, asking. “You sure you’re alright?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a smile. “Thanks for saving me.”

“My pleasure,” Oliver replied, rolling his shoulders. When the doorbell rang, Oliver asked, “Now do me a favor and sit down on the couch where you hopefully can’t get hurt, while I will take care of our dinner. William, you make sure she doesn’t stumble over her own feet or anything.”

Oliver winked at William, making him chuckle. Felicity meanwhile only rolled with her eyes. When she turned around to head to the living room, Oliver playfully slapped her butt. Felicity looked back at him over her shoulder, but he was already walking to the door.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Felicity?” William asked.

Felicity smiled at him, putting an arm around his shoulders. “I’m fine. Thank you.”


	185. Seven-year itch

“Is this the start of our seven-year itch?”

Felicity looked back at Oliver over her shoulder and chuckled at the sight. He was following her with some distance, his hands pushed into the pockets of his pants and a grumpy look on his face. She’d love to tell him that he was really cute when he was this grumpy, but she was sure that he didn’t want to hear that. It didn’t mean that it was any less true, though.

“We won’t have a seven-year itch,” Felicity replied, stepping into her office.

“You said that this morning when I brought you breakfast in bed already,” Oliver grumbled. “I was probably naïve to believe you then without second thought, but I guess I was distracted when you started undressing yourself. Then I forgot about it with the nice day we spent together, but you have been a little quiet during dinner and then you skipped dessert at the restaurant and insisted to head to work despite the time we were stuck in traffic, so now I really start having doubts.”

Felicity stepped behind her desk and watched Oliver. When he puckered his lips and gave her a pouting look, she had to press her lips together to keep herself from bursting out in laughter. He looked like Emmy when she was told to go to bed five minutes before her usual bed time. The five-year-old was determined to put every second she was allowed to stay away to good use, so being told to change into her pajamas five minutes before the time they had agreed to was a huge deal for her.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver shook his head, crossing his arms in front of his chest and holding her gaze. Felicity took in a deep breath through her nose, waiting for the dragging pain low in her back to cease, before she stepped in front of Oliver. He watched her intensely, but he didn’t move. Smiling, Felicity uncrossed his arms in front of his chest and put them around her waist instead. She wrapped her own arms around his neck and pressed herself as close to him as the baby bump allowed it.

When Oliver still just looked at her without, his face still unmoving and his lips still puckered, Felicity straightened up onto her tiptoes and brushed her lips against his. It took a moment, but eventually Oliver tightened his arms around her ducked his head down to respond to the kiss. Felicity stroked her fingertips through the short hair at the nape of his neck and pulled his bottom lips between hers.

Once their lips parted, Felicity lowered herself back onto her heels and put a hand to Oliver’s cheek. With a low sigh Oliver snuggled his face into the palm of her hand and Felicity enjoyed the way his short stubble scratched and tickled her skin. She smiled at him softly.

“We, my love,” she said with a wide smile, “are not going through a seven-year itch, and we won’t go through a seven-year itch at anytime during the following twelve months because we are stronger than any stupid cliché or statistics.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes at her slightly. “And why are we spending our wedding anniversary in the company instead of the bed, having fun?”

Felicity chuckled. “Oliver, we have barely been here for two minutes, and we will leave in like two minutes already. All I have to do is dropping some files on the desk for Curtis to make sure they will get to the administration department and then I am done here.”

“I just don’t get why you felt the need to drop those files here today of all days in the first place,” Oliver replied, looking at her with perked up eyebrows.

Again Felicity chuckled, loosening herself out of Oliver’s arms and going back to her desk. Under Oliver’s intense gaze she pulled the files she had told him she needed to drop here from her purse and put them to the side of her desk. She sat down on the armchair with a sigh and moved her hands over the top of the desk gently. She loved her work and she would miss it a lot. She loved her family too, though, so that should make up for that.

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest once more and asked, “You do realize that you and I are celebrating our wedding anniversary, not you and that desk, right?”

Felicity chuckled before she lifted her gaze to him with a smile on her lips. “I am just saying goodbye.”

“You have been on parental leave for more than a week now which by the way didn’t keep you from coming here every other day to check if everything is alright,” Oliver reminded her without any reproach in his voice. “Why saying goodbye now?”

When Felicity felt a dragging pain low in her back once more, she took in another deep breath. Her hands came to rest to both sides of the baby bump that felt harder than she was used to from the last weeks. Once the wave of pain was gone, Felicity smiled at Oliver, who was watching her with a slightly worried frown.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“We are having a baby.”

Oliver released a low chuckle. “I have noticed. The growing swell of your stomach really helped with that.”

Felicity breathed a quiet laugh, watching Oliver looking back at her happily. She loved how he still looked at her like she was the sun, and his whole life revolved around her. It never failed to make her breathing falter or her heart skip a little more quickly. Admittedly, Felicity had to share that special look with their children now, but she didn’t mind. As long as Oliver didn’t stop looking at her like that, she would be happy.

“Oliver, we are having a baby,” Felicity repeated in a whisper, and when Oliver only frowned at her, she added, “ _now_.”

Immediately Oliver’s eyes widened. His gaze dropped to her hands on the bump like he was expecting to see her holding their baby already before he looked back up at her again quickly. There was excitement and surprise in his eyes, maybe even a little bit of nervousness. “Really?”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “Yes, I am quite sure that I am in labor.”

Oliver quickly walked around the desk, turned her chair, so she was facing him and kneeled down in front of her. His hands came to rest on top of Felicity’s. He smiled at her for a moment longer before he lowered his lips to the bump and pressed a lingering kiss to it through the fabric of Felicity’s dress. His nose pressed against the spot that his lips had touched before, breathing her in.

Felicity watched him. Smiling, she pulled a hand away from under his palm, so she could stroke her fingers through his short hair gently. Her nails scratched over his scull in the way Felicity knew he liked. She loved how much Oliver was looking forward to another family addition. She was just as happy about it.

Though this was their third child already, the joy hadn’t decreased. They were just as happy and excited about this baby as they had been about Emmy and Tommy or when William had joined the family. She didn’t know if that was normal. In a way she had always thought that maybe once you had one child, the excitement was getting less because you knew you what to expect, but it wasn’t like that at all.

When Oliver bent his head back to lock eyes with Felicity again, the smile on his face almost took her breath away. She put her hand to his cheek like she had done before, and Oliver snuggled his face into her touch. He held onto her hand, turning his head to kiss her palm.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” he whispered eventually. “We wouldn’t have had to go to the restaurant. You barely ate anything anyway. Besides, I could have called Curtis and he could have picked up those files when-“

Smiling, Felicity put her fingers to Oliver’s lips. When he shut up, she replied, “Until we finished the main course, I thought it was just Braxton Hicks contractions because it’s too early, you know?”

Oliver frowned. “Due date is only a few days away. I think she is perfectly in time.”

“I just thought that maybe for once one of our children could take after you and be late, at least for the birth that is.”

“Hey, think about it the positive way,” Oliver suggested. Felicity perked up an eyebrow, and Oliver moved his hands over her bump slowly. “If she hurries up a little, maybe she will make it here before midnight.”

“And that is positive because…?” Felicity asked, perking her eyebrow up even more.

Oliver already opened his mouth to reply when Felicity hissed, putting her hands to the small of her back and gently massaging the aching part low on her spine. Her hands were soon replaced by Oliver’s and she sighed at the way his warm fingers knew exactly where to press down to make the pain a little bit better.

“The contractions are close together now,” Oliver said with a frown.

Felicity breathed out through her lips until the contraction had ceased before she nodded her head. “They started out really slow, but I feel they are getting closer and closer to each other very quickly now. It’s much quicker than it was with Emmy actually.”

“Okay, so let’s better take you two to the hospital,” Oliver suggested. He put an arm around Felicity’s waist and helped her onto her feet. Once Felicity stood upright, he handed her her purse and took in a deep breath, smiling so wide that it made Felicity laugh. “We might have our baby tonight.”

“If she is born before midnight, I will blame it on you, and you will not like it because we both know that I am very unforgiving when I want to,” Felicity told him.

Oliver frowned, already starting to walk her to the door. “Why don’t you like the idea of Millie being born during our wedding anniversary? She would be the greatest gift possible for this day.”

“Thanks to Emmy our Valentine’s Day sex is limited to quickies in the bathroom during her birthday party or lazy sex later that day when all guests have left and the kids are in bed,” Felicity replied. “Do you really want Millie to ruin anniversary sex for us?”

While Oliver pressed his lips together, Felicity perked up her eyebrow challengingly. Quickies in the bathroom were always nice, but a special occasion like Valentine’s Day called for a little more than just a quickie. Actually they called for days spent in bed with sex marathons. She really didn’t want the extraordinary sex of another special occasion being limited to another quickie for the next at least eighteen years.

Oliver quickly lowered his eyes back to the bump. “Listen, little girl, do daddy a favor and take your time, okay? It’s ten-forty now. How about you wait another one and a half hours to come here? Can you do that?”

“From your lips to her ears,” Felicity said with a chuckle.

When Oliver pushed the button for the elevator, Felicity hissed as a new contraction was causing some pain from her lower back to her pelvis. She gripped Oliver’s hand tightly and breathed out through her mouth. Oliver rubbed her lower back with firm hands, easing the pain a little.

“The contractions really come fast now,” Oliver said with a frown. “Between this one and the last have been four minutes at most.”

“Like I said, they quickened quite fast. With Emmy it took like all day for them to come with a gap small enough to make me even consider going to the hospital. Today it has only been a few hours.”

“I think I read that birth gets quicker with every baby.”

“But Tommy was born by C-section,” Felicity reminded him though she knew that he hadn’t forgot. It was quite impossible to forget how she had fallen down the stairs and Barry had had to rush her to the hospital. “Usually it’s with every natural birth that the duration of birth decreases, so Tommy doesn’t even count.”

“It seems to be quicker this time anyway,” Oliver stated.

Felicity watched him pushing the button for the elevator several times before she put her hand around his fingers and pulled it away from the button.

“Hon, the elevator won’t come sooner. You more than likely attract the elevator’s anger with it,” she explained and when Oliver opened his mouth to say something, she quickly added, “and don’t even think about saying that the elevator doesn’t have feelings. I understand a lot more of technologies than you do. I tell you, it does have feelings and you are hurting them with your impatience.”

“Right,” Oliver mumbled, probably knowing that it was smarter not to discuss this with her.

Once the elevator doors opened, they got inside. Oliver pushed the button for the underground parking several times, but one strict gaze from Felicity and he quickly pulled his hand back, shooting her a quick glance. Felicity smiled at how eager he was to get her to the hospital quick and safe.

Smiling, she turned to Oliver, so she could circle his waist with her arms and look at him. She saw the slight nervousness in his eyes and it only made her love him more. After Cupid had almost killed Felicity the night Emmy had been born and they had almost lost Tommy because she had fallen down the stairs, Felicity knew that his desire to make sure she and the baby she was having now were safe was even stronger than the first two times.

“I think we could use the time we have before speaking much gets too exhausting for me to do our little anniversary ritual.”

Oliver smiled, stroking his hands up and down her back slowly. “You mean making each other vow a thing?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, exactly.”

“So tell me, Mrs. Queen,” Oliver proposed. “What do you want me to promise to you?”

Felicity pressed her lips together. Some years it was harder to pick a wish than others. This last year for example had been so perfect for them that she really couldn’t think of anything more she could want other than-

When the elevator came to a sudden stop, Felicity almost lost her balance. If it wasn’t for Oliver’s strong arms that tightened around her and secured her against his chest, she would have probably fallen to the floor. As soon as she stood safely on her feet again, Oliver put his hands to her cheeks and bent her head back. He looked at her with worry in his eyes.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes. I just lost my balance for a short moment, but I am fine,” Felicity assured him, nodding her head, “but I fear the elevator is stuck.”

“Okay, that’s no reason to worry. I will just press the panic button and-“

“Oliver, nobody’s here,” Felicity told him. “The control room isn’t staffed.”

“In that case I will just-“

He stopped when Felicity hissed, bending forward slightly. Her hand tightened around his fingers, squeezing tightly. Oliver held her to him, again massaging her lower back.

“Are you alright?” he asked once the contraction was gone and Felicity straightened back up.

Felicity nodded. “Yes. I’m fine. They are just getting a little bit worse.”

“I’ll call the emergency to make sure we get out of here in time,” he told her. “There is no reason to panic.”

“I am not panicking,” Felicity replied, wondering if he was panicking. If the look in his eyes was any indication, he was at least panicking a little given the situation. “The elevator gets stuck sometimes. It’s not a big deal.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow. “No big deal?”

“Hey, don’t look at me like that. I told you the elevator was going to get angry when you pushed the button that often.”

Oliver only shot her a short look before he took his phone and dialed the emergency number. It only took ten seconds before he pressed his lips together tightly.

“Damn it, the cell reception is too bad.”

Felicity sighed, leaning against the cool cab wall. “Don’t worry. It won’t take long.”

“Well, it probably won’t take long until the baby is born either,” Oliver replied.

He looked around carefully. His eyes took in the small cab intensely, looking for a way out. When his eyes narrowed at the ceiling, Felicity followed his gaze.

“No way,” she said immediately.

She remembered very well how they had broken into Merlyn Global. Oliver had taken off a panel of the cab ceiling and helped her into the elevator well. It had been quite fun, going on an undercover mission like that. She was still afraid of heights, though, and she had never been more unwilling of climbing into an elevator shaft than now that her body was aching terribly every few minutes when a contraction ripped through her. Besides, she wouldn’t even make it through the cab ceiling with the round swelling of her stomach.

“Felicity, we need to get out of here,” Oliver told her.

“Yeah, but not like that,” Felicity insisted. “I want us to get out of here safe and sound. Safe and sound does not call elevator wells, but that might be just me thinking like that.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed her forehead. “I will find a way, okay?”

“Take your time,” Felicity told him. “I am not even worried.”

She really wasn’t worried. The elevator got stuck from time to time, but it never took very long. Looking back, it would have probably been smart to make sure the elevators were fixed quickly. She was sure she had put that on the list of things she needed to do before her parental leave started, but she couldn’t remember actually doing it, so chances were high that she had forgotten and-

When the next contraction caused a terribly dragging pain in her pelvis, Felicity gasped for breath. She couldn’t stop the small whimper falling from her lips. She tried to breathe against the pain, but it hurt so horribly much that she couldn’t get herself to keep quiet. She felt her knees almost giving in, but Oliver was there immediately, holding her upright and against him tightly. Felicity squeezed his forearms, her fingernails digging into Oliver’s skin.

“Felicity, that’s barely been three minutes.”

Felicity panted, still holding onto him tightly. “I fear our baby is planning on making quite a quick entrance into this world, and I doubt we will make it to the hospital even if we-“

When she felt something wet running down her thighs, she looked down and saw the clear liquid pooling around her feet.

“Please tell me you just peed,” Oliver said.

“No, I think that was my waters,” her voice now slightly panicked.

This was not how she had envisioned this baby to be born. Admittedly, it was easier than fearing that the baby was going to get abducted or died during birth, but it still wasn’t her scenario for a perfectly quiet birth. That scenario would include her and Oliver in a delivery room with a doctor during a quiet night without any crimes that could interrupt them. Unfortunately, it seemed like destiny had decided that they wouldn’t get that perfect scenario.

Felicity looked at Oliver, seeing the panic in his eyes. She moved her right hand down his forearm to his hand and laced her fingers through his. Taking in a deep breath, she locked her eyes with Oliver’s.

“Oliver, I think we are on our own with this.”

“So you mean…”

“That we have to find out how we make sure that she is going to be safely delivered without any health care at hand.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went back and forth about when to post this, but I decided to do so tonight. The next chapter will be Sunday, Tuesday or Thursday, depending on my mood. ;)


	186. One last time

Everything happened so impossibly quickly. It was almost like Felicity was disconnected from her life, just looking through the eyes of some random woman how that woman was giving birth in an elevator with only her husband by her side. She didn’t feel like it was she herself giving birth this moment. The pain that should probably connect her to the situation wasn’t strong enough to take away the exhaustion that disconnected her from it.

If Felicity wasn’t this exhausted and in pain, she might actually be amazed by how well Oliver was handling the situation. From the moment it had been clear that she was no longer able to stay calm for the two of them, Oliver had taken over for her with that. Immediately he had started balancing her slight panic about the circumstances in which their third baby was born into this world with his controlled actions.

Given his first reaction when the elevator had jerked to a sudden halt Felicity hadn’t thought he would be able to stay calm, especially when her own calmness had been taken away from the pain that ripped through her with every new contraction. Oliver had all reason to be calm, though, because he knew exactly what he had to do. It had turned out that his desire to make sure that Felicity and the baby got through this birth safely had actually pushed him to read several websites and books on what do if birth started unexpectedly. Felicity had no idea how she could have missed that, but then again she had worked so much that she shouldn’t be surprised. Oliver was the kind of man who did a thing like this to make sure that she and their baby was going to be fine.

For the break of a second Felicity had thought that maybe his careful preparations had been like challenging destiny and that was why they were trapped in the elevator now. As soon as the thought had popped up in her mind, as quickly it had disappeared with the next contraction, though. The difficult situation they were in was nobody’s fault.

Oliver had helped her to get down to the floor since the sharp pain the contractions caused made her legs wobbly and threaten to give in. The last thing they needed right now was for Felicity to fall, though. Now she was half sitting, half lying on the floor. Her back was leaning against the cold wall of the elevator cab, but it didn’t keep strands of hair from clinging to her sweaty face. She had lost any sense for time a long time ago it seemed, but in the short of time that she still had been able to focus she hadn’t missed how quickly the delivery seemed to move forward. She didn’t miss the ability of her brain to form an internal ramble even in a situation like this.

Felicity didn’t know how long she had been cowering on the floor, breathing against the pain, and listening to Oliver’s words of encouragement whenever the waves of pain had ceased when she had finally heard a voice from the other side of the elevator doors. Apparently one of the security guards had heard her screams and come to check on them. Felicity wasn’t sure if Oliver had told him to get a doctor or someone to fix the elevator or maybe both because she had been distracted by a new wave of pain.

In the short pauses between the contractions Felicity tried to remember if it had hurt just as badly when Emmeline had been born, but she really couldn’t remember much of what had happened between Roy rescuing her from Cupid and the doctor handing her a crying Baby Emmy. The good thing about it was that she was probably not going to remember the pain she was in right now either. Admittedly, Felicity was sure she wouldn’t remember any of what had happened since the elevator had come to a stop. She felt too exhausted and too much in pain to even notice everything that was going on as it was happening right now. She didn’t really try to anyway.

Instead Felicity focused on Oliver’s words as much as she could. Whatever book and websites he had read seemed to make him into the perfect midwife. He held her hand, never complaining when she tightened her fingers around his so much that she feared she might break them though that didn’t have anything to do with the websites and books because he hadn’t complained during Emmy’s birth either. He reminded her to breathe when she seemed to be too much in a haze for her to remind herself of it. He told her how well she did whenever a contraction ceased, kissing the side of her face lovingly between his words. Summed up, Felicity had no idea how she would made it without Oliver.

He measured her cervix with his fingers every now and then, testing when the time to start pushing was. Once he told her that she was opened wide enough, something she had never thought she’d hear Oliver say in a not-sexual context, he moved down between her legs. He took off his leather jacket and his shirt, putting both of it to the floor next to him. Felicity chuckled breathily between her erratic panting and asked if he really thought now was the right time for that. Oliver seemed to be so focused on his task of being her midwife – Felicity’s brain was too occupied by the pain to even think about how funny imagining Oliver Queen as a real midwife was – to laugh about that. With serious voice he explained to her that they needed something to wrap the baby in to keep her warm.

It wasn’t long until Oliver told her to push. Felicity felt unable to even question him about it. She trusted Oliver with her life and their baby’s life, so she just did exactly what he asked her to do. She pushed when he told her to and she went back to breathing rhythmically when he asked her to do that instead. For her right now it was as simple and as difficult as that. She did whatever Oliver asked from her.

Felicity had pushed a couple of times already when she heard voices and noises from outside. She looked at Oliver in question, unable to ask what was going on since her wild panting made it hard to speak. She didn’t need to say the question out loud for Oliver to understand, though. He explained that the security guard had called an ambulance and someone to break open the doors of the elevator. He also told her that they probably wouldn’t make it in time because according to him it wouldn’t take that much longer.

When the next contraction ripped through her, Felicity pushed again. She squeezed her eyes shut, tightening her hold on Oliver’s hand even more. A loud cry of pain escaped her lips. Once the contraction was over, Felicity leaned back against the cab wall again. Tears were running down her cheeks, mixing with her sweat. She couldn’t hear it over the loud pounding of her heart against her ribs, but given the wild rising and falling of her chest Felicity knew that she was crying with sobs falling from her lips.

Oliver squeezed her hand and said her name to make her look at him, but Felicity kept her eyes shut, shaking her head. She couldn’t look at him. She was exhausted, terribly exhausted. She didn’t know when she had been this exhausted the last time and that probably meant a lot because she was a working mom. She led a multi-billion company, had two children, three with William, and she was pregnant. Well, she wasn’t pregnant that much longer, but then she was a mother of three or rather four with William, so…

She felt Oliver squeezing her hand again, and she heard him saying her name again, but Felicity still couldn’t look at him.

This wasn’t how she had pictured this baby being born. She had wanted to be in a hospital where they could be taken care of. Oliver was doing great, but she already had given birth twice in a way that felt completely messed up. Couldn’t they have a normal, uncomplicated birth for once? After Emmy and Tommy this was their last chance, and _this_ – a birth in the elevator – was what they got? Destiny seemed to be at war with them.

She felt Oliver moving to her side, and with a quiet sob she leaned her head against his chest. Felicity enjoyed the warmth of his body, and she pressed herself as close to him as possible to borrow from his warmth and take the comfort he offered.

“Felicity,” Oliver urged after a long moment, putting a hand under her chin to bend her head back and make her look at him.

Felicity was barely able to see him through her tears of frustration and exhaustion. Once she noticed the intensity of his eyes, her gaze finally started focusing on his face. She lifted a hand and put her fingers around his wrist.

“You are doing so great, Felicity,” Oliver encouraged her, squeezing her hand once more. “You are doing perfect. It just needs one more push, okay? I know you are exhausted. You have every right to be, but right now our baby needs you to push one more time, okay? Only one more time, one _last_ time. You can do this, Felicity. I know you can.”

He kissed her temple, moving his hand from under her chin to his cheek, stroking her heated skin.

She could do this. If Oliver believed she could do this, then she could. She had to. She had to be able to do this. She had to be strong enough to do this. She had to be strong enough for herself and for him and for their baby.

When she met Oliver’s eyes again, his eyes still focused on her face intensely. He was waiting for her to say something, but she felt unable to. Instead she just nodded, letting him know that she was ready.

Just one last time, she told herself, just one last time. All she needed to do was gathering all the strength that was left in her and push. That was all that was needed to do to bring their baby into this world. She could do that.

Oliver kissed her temple once more before he moved back down between her legs. His kissed her knuckles, giving her a look that made her know that she had to let go. With heavy heart Felicity let go, putting her hands to her knees instead. Her fingers were digging into the skin around her knees. She was panting more and more quickly, knowing the next contraction couldn’t be far away, as she was watching Oliver taking the shirt he had taken off before.

When Oliver locked eyes with her, asking if she was ready without saying a word, Felicity nodded her head.

“Okay, Felicity, push.”

And push Felicity did. She squeezed her eyes shut and pushed as much as she could. The pain was indescribable. Felicity almost felt like passing out. She had no idea how her body was able to take this pain. It should be impossible to endure pain like that. Her body should break in the effort to keep holding on during this incredible pain.

Felicity forgot all those thoughts, all the memories of pain and the feeling of exhaustion, the moment she heard the newborn’s cry, though. Euphoria filled her as endorphins were running through her veins at the sound of hearing her baby cry for the first time. Panting, she opened her eyes, watching Oliver how he wrapped the tiny human being into his shirt, wiping some of the vernix off the rosy skin in the process. As strong as Felicity knew Oliver’s hands and arms could be, they were so gentle when they were holding and taking care of their baby.

Felicity barely had time to process the view before Oliver put the baby to her chest. The tiny human being rested right against her heart, the little head leaning against the side of her neck. Even through the fabric of Oliver’s shirt Felicity could feel the warmth radiating of the baby’s body.

“Oh my god,” Felicity whispered as she was taking in her newborn. Tears formed in her eyes and made it hard to so. Felicity took in a sniffling breath, closing her eyes, and pressed her lips to the baby’s temple.

They had made it. Despite the messy circumstances they had made it, and it had all been worth it. They had their beautiful baby safe in their arms, and if the loud crying was any indication, the baby was perfectly fine. Felicity could feel the baby’s heart beating against her chest, proving that the baby seemed to be healthy. That was all that mattered at the end anyway. A few tears escaped her eyes as she was putting a hand to the baby’s back and one to the baby’s head.

Oliver crawled to Felicity’s side, wrapping his arms around her and the baby tightly. Sobbing quietly, Felicity rested her head against his shoulder without ever taking her eyes off their baby. Oliver’s hand came to rest on hers on their baby’s back, and he kissed her forehead. Despite her desire to keep watching their baby for as long as possible, Felicity tore her eyes away from their newest addition to the family and looked at Oliver instead.

The joy and admiration in his eyes took her breath away. His blue eyes took in their baby carefully as if he was trying to memorize every little detail there was to remember about the little human being on Felicity’s chest. Tears glanced in his eyes. When he took in a deep breath, Felicity didn’t miss the tremble in it.

“Thank you.” As soon as the whispered words had left Felicity’s lips, Oliver turned his gaze to her, and she added, “I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Yes, you could have,” Oliver whispered back and kissed her forehead. “Thank you for making me this happy.”

Oliver ducked his head and brushed her lips with his, making her even happier than she had been before. When their lips parted, they just smiled at each other for a long moment, sharing their joy. It was the louder-growing cries of their baby that turned their attention back to the little human being.

“She is beautiful,” Oliver whispered.

“She?” Felicity asked with a smile, following Oliver’s gaze to their baby. “So we were right with our feelings that we were having a girl?”

“Apparently we were, yes,” Oliver answered and leaned his cheek against the crown of Felicity’s head, stroking his hand over their daughter’s head.

For a long moment neither of them said a word. They just enjoyed this first moment with their newborn daughter. Oliver stroked his hands all over the little human being’s body like he was trying to convince himself that she was really here and not just a dream. Felicity watched the little girl intensely, feeling her love for her grow with each more second she kept looking at her.

“How late is it?” Felicity asked eventually.

“Hm?” Oliver asked.

“How late is it?” Felicity repeated. “I need to know when she was born, so-“

“It was two minutes after midnight that she was born,” Oliver whispered into her ear before kissing the shell of it. “She already proved to us how much she loves us.”

“Yes, she did,” Felicity replied with a whisper. “I would have easily forgiven her if she hadn’t taken her time, though.”

“Of course,” Oliver whispered in agreement. “We can never be angry at our kids for very long, right?”

Felicity smiled. “I can’t think of anything our kids could do that would make me stay angry at them for long.”

“Neither can I.” That being said Oliver leaned down and kissed both of their daughter’s cheeks. His pressed his nose to her chin, breathing her in.

Felicity loosened an arm from around their daughter to stroke her fingers through Oliver’s short hair. He rested the side of his face against their baby’s tummy, closing his eyes with a sigh that showed how exhausted he was too. He was still smiling, though.

“Oliver?” Felicity whispered.

“Hm?” Oliver asked back.

“I know our anniversary is officially over, but since we were interrupted before, I think I want to ask you to stay as amazing as you are.”

Oliver’s smiled widened. Not lifting his head off their daughter’s body, he opened his eyes and looked at Felicity. “Will you promise me the same?”

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied.

“Then so do I.”

Smiling, Oliver sat up. He stroked a hand over Felicity’s head and kissed her gently. His tongue slipped into her mouth, and Felicity moaned into the kiss. Her heartbeat fastened. As messy as the circumstances of their daughter’s birth had been, this moment was perfect.

“Mr. and Mrs. Queen?” a voice came from outside the elevator, making them break their kiss.

“Yes?” Oliver answered, tightening his arms around his two girls instinctively. His fingers laced through Felicity’s on their daughter’s back.

“We are going to break the doors open now,” the voice from outside informed them. “The elevator is stuck between the second and third floor, though. That means you will have to climb out of the elevator. We have paramedics here. They will help all of you out, take Mrs. Queen and the baby downstairs and then take you to the hospital.”

“Thank you,” Oliver said. “Just open the door, and the rest will be okay.”

“It might get a little louder, but that’s normal,” a different voice informed them.

“That’s okay,” Oliver explained.

Five minutes later the elevator doors were opened. The elevator was indeed stuck mid-floor, so the floor or the elevator was like three or four feet over the floor where the security guard, the technician and two paramedics were looking at them.

“Are you three okay in there?” one of the paramedics asked.

Felicity nodded. “Yes, we’re fine, I think. We are just exhausted.”

“Is the umbilical cord cut?” the paramedic asked.

“No, not yet,” Oliver replied. “We didn’t have tools here, and I didn’t want to-“

“Okay, I am going to tell you how to do it.”

The paramedic handed Oliver two clamps and a medical scissor. He told Oliver exactly what to do, and Felicity watched Oliver following the paramedic’s instruction carefully. It only took two minutes before everything was done, and they were told that they could get out of the elevator now.

“Mr. Queen, I suggest you give us the baby and then help your wife out,” the paramedic explained. “That way we can make sure that all of you get out safely.”

Oliver nodded, turning to Felicity. “Ready to give her to me?”

“Ready to hold our baby for the first time one last time?” Felicity asked back with a smile. When Oliver frowned and cocked his head, Felicity squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head with a low chuckle. “That sentence made a lot more sense in my head. I just meant… well, this is the first time you will be really holding her because right after the birth you only had her for a short moment and there was probably still so much adrenaline in your body that you couldn’t really enjoy it, so it doesn’t really count. Now we agreed that she will be our last baby, so this is the last time that you will hold our baby for the first time. Does that make sense?”

Oliver smiled. He brushed his lips against hers before he nodded. “Yes, it does.”

They smiled at each other for a long moment until someone cleared his throat behind them.

“I don’t want to scramble, but we should get you out of here and to the hospital, so-“

“Sure, sorry,” Oliver hurried to say.

He took their daughter from Felicity’s chest and held her against his naked chest gently. The baby looked so much smaller in Oliver’s strong arms, Felicity realized with a smile. It had been like that with Emmy and Tommy, too. When she had been holding them, they had already seemed to be so small. In Oliver’s arms they always appeared to be even smaller.

Oliver’s eyes sparkled as he was taking in their daughter from so much closer now. Felicity smiled at the way Oliver was looking at the little human being like he had been waiting his whole life to finally meet her and hold her in his eyes. He pressed a kiss to their daughter’s forehead and whispered with so much love and pride in his voice that it made tears form in Felicity’s eyes, “Hi, Millie. I’m your daddy.”


	187. Her first hero

Oliver closed the door behind him quietly, never taking his eyes off Felicity and their newborn daughter. While Felicity was sleeping in the hospital bed, she had one arm stretched out, so her hand was resting on Millie’s tiny body. The little girl was sleeping in the neonatal crib right next to her mother’s bed, wrapped tightly into a white blanket. She was wearing a thin hairband with a pink flower at the side that matched the pink flowers on the blanket. So young and already a little fashion Queen – Oliver was sure Thea would approve.

His whole body warmed at the sight. He had only been separated from these two for a few hours, but he had missed them terribly. The first hours of being separated from his baby were always the worst. It had been the same with Emmy and Tommy. It would take some time until he would get used to the feeling of not having Millie by his side every second of every day.

He knew it had been necessary to leave them. After they had gotten out of the elevators, they had been taken to the hospital where they had been welcomed by a team of hospital staff. While a nurse had taken care of Millie, a doctor had taken a look at Felicity. He had found out that because of the quick delivery Felicity had needed a minor surgery. They had waited until the nurse had told them that their youngest baby girl was perfectly healthy and they had been able to spend some more moments with her before they had told the doctor that they were ready for the surgery.

Oliver had spent the hour Felicity’s surgery had taken in the nursery. He had held her and talked to her while watching her intensely until he had been able to recall her little body in all detail when he closed his eyes. Only when a nurse had informed him that Felicity was out of surgery, Oliver had put Millie down in the crib and taken her to Felicity’s room, so they were there when she woke up.

As soon as Felicity had opened her eyes and looked at him, they had both started smiling. Oliver had sat down at the edge of the mattress and kissed her gently, pouring all the love and gratitude for her into the kiss. They had only pulled apart when Millie had made a sound, loudly reminding their parents that she was part of their lives now, so Oliver had lifted the crying baby into his arms and given her to Felicity. Then he had moved more onto the bed, snuggling himself to Felicity’s side and wrapping his arms around her and Millie.

For a long time they had just stayed like this, enjoying the quiet moment with their daughter without saying a word. They had both been tired from the long day and the exhausting events, but they had been too happy to fall asleep.

The sun had almost started rising already when Felicity had finally spoken, asking if he had already messaged someone to announce this great news. Since he hadn’t, they had quickly taken a photo of the three of them and messaged it to the people closest to them. It had taken a few more hours until the first of their friends and family had woken up and congratulated them to their baby girl’s birth.

Later in the morning, when Felicity had been drifting asleep every few minutes, she and Oliver had decided that he should go and tell Emmy and Tommy about their baby sister’s birth. Oliver had waited until Felicity had been asleep before he had kissed her goodbye and headed to Quentin’s and Donna’s home where Emmy and Tommy had spent the night.

Emmy had been more than excited when he had told them the news. She had wanted to head to the hospital immediately, but Oliver had told her that Felicity and Millie needed some sleep, and that had convinced the five-year-old to be patient a little bit longer. Tommy had been a little less excited at first, but his sister’s enthusiasm had soon infected him. Now he was looking forward to meeting Millie just as much as Emmy was.

How could someone possibly not look forward to meet this sweetest of human beings Oliver wondered as he stepped to his daughter’s crib and smiled at the sleeping baby.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Oliver whispered quietly, not wanting to wake either of these two sleeping beauties. He leaned down and gently kissed Millie’s forehead, stroking the tips of his fingers against the crown of her head at the same time. He pulled just a little bit away, so he could look at Millie and whispered, “Thanks for letting mommy sleep. She had an exhausting day.”

He kissed Millie’s forehead once more before he turned his attention to Felicity. Smiling, he sat down on the edge of the bed and just looked at his wife. Though she was sleeping and an exhausted expression on her face, there was the slightest of a smile playing on her lips and Oliver was unable to stop himself from leaning forwards and closing the distance between their lips. He kissed her softly, just brushing his lips against hers. It took a few seconds before she responded to the kiss, pressing her lips back to his. She lifted a hand to his cheek, her fingertips stroking over his short stubble.

“Hi,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted and his forehead came resting against hers.

“Hi,” Felicity whispered back before she brushed her lips against his once more.

They stayed like that for several minutes, just enjoying being so close to one another. Neither of them needed to say a word for them to know that they weren’t just sharing this moment as husband and wife. They were sharing this moment as parents of a newborn baby.

When Oliver pulled a little more away, he smiled at Felicity. “Did you catch some sleep?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a sigh, shooting a look at their sleeping daughter. “She has been an angel these last hours.”

“She definitely looks like one,” Oliver said, squeezing Felicity’s hand.

He got up from the bed and approached Millie’s crib once more. He carefully pushed one hand under Millie’s head, the other under her tiny body and lifted her from the bed. He lay Millie down in Felicity’s arm before he slid into bed with her and leaned his cheek against Felicity’s temple. She turned her head to look at him for a moment.

“What about you?” Felicity asked. “Did you get some sleep?”

Oliver chuckled. “No, I had to tell Emmy and Tommy everything about their baby sister and show them all the photos I took of her.”

While he was saying these words, Oliver moved his fingertips over the soft skin of Millie’s cheek. The young girl moved slightly, releasing a low sound, but she didn’t wake up.

“Speaking of Emmy and Tommy,” Felicity said angling her head to look at Oliver with a frown, “where are they? I thought you were going to bring them here?”

“Quentin is going to drop them in a few minutes,” Oliver replied. “They are making a departure, so they can pick up William from the station before getting here. I called him, and he wanted to come here immediately. I thought that was a good way to have the kids come here a little later. I selfishly wanted a few more minutes with the two of you just for myself.”

Felicity smiled at him. “I selfishly wanted the same thing to be honest.”

Slowly Oliver leaned down and kissed Felicity. His tongue stroked into her mouth while his hand found hers on their daughter’s tummy, their fingers tangling. He moved his lips against hers slowly, stroking the tip of his tongue against hers. When their lips parted, Oliver kissed the tip of Felicity’s nose before pecking her lips once more.

They smiled at each other widely, sharing a conversation without words. Oliver loved these moments, these moments where neither of them had to speak because they knew what the other was thinking.

“I woke up at some point in the last hours,” Felicity suddenly said, “and used the time to fill in the birth records. Can you take a look if my postnatal brain didn’t mess anything up?”

Oliver chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose once more. “Sure.”

“It’s in the drawer,” Felicity explained.

Turning slightly, Oliver pulled the piece of paper from the drawer. He snuggled back close to Felicity and Millie, not missing the opportunity to kiss first the corner of Felicity’s lips and then Millie’s cheek before he took a look at the paper in his hand. He hadn’t even reached the end of the first line when he already frowned.

“Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“That’s not the middle name we agreed on,” Oliver said.

When he looked at Felicity he found her eyes already on him. She had her lips puckered and her head cocked, giving him an innocent look. “It isn’t?”

“No,” Oliver simply replied, shaking his head. “It isn’t.”

“Well, you didn’t like Dearden as a middle name anyway,” Felicity told him with a shrug of her shoulders, “so I figured it was a good idea to use something else instead, and I realized that this was actually quite fitting.”

“You think?” Oliver asked. Felicity nodded, but Oliver shook his head. “I don’t agree.”

Felicity pressed her lips together for a short moment, taking him in. She took the birth record from him, put it to the end of the bed and pushed Millie into his arms. Oliver instinctively pulled the sleeping newborn as close to his chest as possible, keeping her safe and warm. He lowered his lips to his daughter’s forehead, brushing them against her soft skin for a moment. When he looked back up at Felicity, she turned onto her side and snuggled herself closer to Oliver. She rested her head against his shoulder for a moment, moving her hand over Millie’s cheek gently. Oliver watched her looking at their little girl with so much admiration in his eyes that it made his stomach tingle.

It took a moment before Felicity took her eyes off their daughter with a sigh. She rested her chin on his shoulder and just looked at him, not saying a word.

“Puppy eyes are not going to make me agree, Felicity,” Oliver said slowly.

“We both know that you’re the one with the puppy eyes,” Felicity replied with a chuckle.

“I don’t have puppy eyes,” Oliver responded with a shake of his head, a smile spreading on his lips nonetheless. He shot her a look and kissed the tip of her nose. She was still looking at him when he pulled away. Sighing, Oliver admitted defeat. He knew that she wasn’t going to let go of the idea until they discussed it. “Shoot. Why do you think this is a good idea?”

Felicity sat up a little straighter, obviously trying to be completely focused when she lay down all the reasons why she thought her new choice of a middle name was a good idea.

“I just think it-“

A quiet knock at the door kept Felicity from continuing. She pursed her lips for a moment before she looked back over her shoulder at the door.

“Come in!”

The door opened, and William stuck his head in at the door. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Oliver replied with a smile while Felicity was taking the birth record from her legs and put it back in the drawer.

“Can we come in?” William asked.

“Yes, sure,” Felicity replied. When she slumped back on the bed next to Oliver, she kissed his cheek and whispered, “We talk about this later.”

Oliver nodded and gave Millie back to Felicity right before the door opened further. Emmy came running into the room first, immediately followed by her little brother. William closed the door before he followed a few steps behind his younger siblings.

“I want-“

“Pssst,” Felicity quickly hushed Emmy’s loud voice, putting a finger to her lips. “You’re little sister is sleeping.”

Immediately Emmy pressed her lips together and nodded, telling her mom that she had understood and wouldn’t wake the new family member. Then she crawled onto the bed and sat down on her mother’s thighs, close to her baby sister. She smiled widely, taking in every inch of Millie’s face. Oliver felt his heart warming even more. He loved how much Emmy loved babies. She was taking so much after him with that.

“Can I kiss her?” Emmy asked in a whisper, putting a hand to Millie’s head and stroking over the short hair.

Felicity smiled. “Yes, of course.”

Emmy leaned forward and pressed her lips to her little sister’s cheek gently. Her little fingers still moved through Millie’s short hair. Oliver’s face almost hurt from watching the scene. He remembered how hesitant Millie had been when she had first met Tommy. She had held onto her daddy’s hand for reassurance before she had leaned forward to kiss her newborn baby brother.

“Dada!”

Oliver lifted Tommy, who had walked around the bed and was standing next to him now with his arms reached out for him, onto the mattress. He wanted to push Tommy further onto the bed, so he could sit between his parents and take a look at his baby sister. The young boy pushed himself behind Oliver’s back in an attempt to use his father’s broad chest as a safety barrier, though. His short arms wrapped around his father’s neck tightly, almost choking him, and Oliver reached out an arm behind him to keep the boy from falling off the edge of the mattress.

“Don’t you want to welcome your baby sister into the family?” Oliver asked in a whisper. Tommy pressed his face to Oliver’s neck, tightening his arms around his neck in the meantime. Oliver smiled at his son’s shyness. “Are you scared?”

Tommy nodded, not lifting his head from the juncture of Oliver’s neck and shoulder. The boy’s body was fully pressed against his daddy’s back. Smiling, Oliver pulled Tommy onto his lap, making sure he was still not too close to Millie, though.

“Should we take a look together?” Oliver asked. Tommy looked up at his dad with the same blue eyes before he slowly nodded. Oliver’s smile widened. “Yeah?”

“Yes,” Tommy replied with a hesitant smile.

“Okay, so let’s do this together.”

He took one of Tommy’s hands and slowly pulled him closer to Millie. Emmy refused to make room for her brother to take a look at their sister for a moment, but Oliver nodded his head to the side and with a low sigh Emmy moved a little away. Tommy crawled closer carefully, leaning down over Millie’s head and looked at her.

“Maybe you want to kiss her?” Felicity suggested. A frown formed on Tommy’s forehead and he quickly sat back on Oliver’s thighs, leaning his head against his daddy’s chest. Felicity chuckled. “I guess that’s a no.”

Oliver kissed the crown of Tommy’s head with a smile. He barely remembered how it had felt when he had seen Thea for the first time. If any of the stories his mom had told all her life was true, he had felt kind of awkward about seeing such a tiny human being too. Oliver had been a lot older than Tommy, but it was probably still the same.

“She is really beautiful,” William said from his place at the foot at the bed.

William had his hands pushed in the pockets of his jeans, watching the five Queens with an awkward expression. Oliver knew that his oldest son sometimes still had trouble finding his place in this family, and he remembered very clearly the conversation they had had after he and Felicity had announced to the kids that they were going to have another baby. William had been worried because a new family member meant new family dynamics. He had been worried about losing the place he had just found he was comfortable in.

“Thank you,” Oliver said with a warm smile. “She really is all kinds of perfect.”

Slowly William stepped closer to Felicity’s side, taking a more careful look at his baby sister.

“Do you want to hold her?” Felicity asked.

“Oh, I don’t know,” William hurried to say, holding his arms in front of him in an almost rejecting manner, but Felicity simply ignored that and put Millie into her oldest brother’s arms nonetheless. William quickly adjusted the position of his arms, holding his baby sister to him tightly. “Wow.”

Oliver smiled proudly, watching his oldest son holding his youngest daughter. Now his family really was completed. He and Felicity had decided early in this pregnancy that Millie would be their last child. With four children all nurseries at their home were filled now, and with two boys and two girls their family was also perfectly balanced.

That was why Oliver tried to memorize this moment. He knew he would never again see his children welcome another sibling into the family. He was more than happy that William had managed to come here spontaneously because he wouldn’t have wanted his son to miss this. He had missed so much already.

When Millie started moving in his arms, releasing a low sound, William quickly looked at Felicity. “I think she is waking up. Maybe I should-“

William moved to give his baby sister back to Felicity, but she just quickly shook her head and explained, “Just rock her a little in your arms. You can do this.”

At the trust in Felicity’s words William shot her a quick look, smiling happily. He focused back on his baby sister then, rocking her in his arms slowly like Felicity had suggested, and indeed the little girl calmed down. She moved a little less, falling silent.

“She has her eyes opened,” William said with a wide smile. When he looked up at Oliver, though, he frowned. “What’s her name by the way?”

“Millie,” Oliver replied with a smile.

“I like the name,” Emmy said, and yet she mumbled something to herself that at least to Oliver sounded suspiciously like, “I’m still going to call her Dory sometimes.”

Yes, Emmy’s obsession with _Finding Nemo_ had only increased since _Finding Dory_. When she was playing with her siblings, she often renamed them after some of the movie characters. Usually Tommy ended up being Nemo and William was Crush. The preference of her own Disney-inspired name had switched from Dory to Destiny. Oliver hadn’t had it in himself to tell Emmy that for him Destiny sounded a lot like a name for a stripper. Well, he didn’t know how to explain that to her anyway.

“And Millie is the short form for?” William asked eventually.

“For Camille,” Oliver explained. “Camille Queen.”

“No middle name?”

“The middle name’s still in discussion,” Felicity explained. “We have different opinion on this which I think is a first. We usually fight about the first name but never about the middle name.”

Oliver frowned. “We haven’t really fought about the middle name.”

“Yet,” Felicity added in a whisper, shooting him a gaze from the side that made Oliver chuckle.

“What’s the problem about the middle name?” William asked.

“Well, I want to name our daughter after someone who was a great help to me in a moment of crisis, but Oliver is against it,” Felicity told William, her eyes still on Oliver, though, “which is a little ridiculous because Emmeline’s and Tommy’s names are both inspired by people like that. Well, Tommy’s not so much now that I think about it or maybe yes… Anyway, both their names are inspired by people that have been or still part of our life, but apparently your father thinks that we should break with this tradition.”

Oliver shook his head. Felicity was leaving out an important part about the name that changed things at least for him. He gave her a look, but she only looked back at him challengingly. Oliver knew that William, Emmy and Tommy were all watching them, waiting for one of them to speak.

“I think we will find a better name,” he stated eventually.

“No, we won’t,” Felicity told him. She tightened her arms around Emmy’s waist before she turned a little more onto her side to look at Oliver. “That name will always remember her of the hero that helped bringing her to life. I couldn’t have done it without him. She couldn’t have done it without him. _We_ couldn’t have done it without him. She wasn’t even born when he already saved her life, and I think that is something that deserves acknowledgement. I think it’s the right choice to give her a middle name that is inspired by her first hero. Besides, he kind of is my hero too.”

Oliver sighed. He knew Felicity too well to think that this was just a fix idea. She really thought that way, and that why she really wanted Millie to carry this middle name. He also knew that if he continued objecting to the middle name, she wouldn’t push on it much longer because at the end she always accepted his opinion even if it was differing from hers. Just like he couldn’t get himself to ruin the name of her favorite character in Finding Dory for Emmy, he also couldn’t get himself to deny Felicity the desired middle name for their daughter, especially since she was giving him her best puppy eyes right now.

Nodding slowly, Oliver sighed once more and admitted defeat. He and Felicity had been able to decide on a Millie’s name rather easily, and he wasn’t going to have that messed up because of Millie’s middle name now. Smiling widely, Felicity leaned over to him and pressed a long kiss to his lips in gratitude.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

Oliver grumbled lowly in response. The chuckle Felicity released at that infected him. Laughing lowly, Oliver shook his head and rolled his eyes slightly. He couldn’t say no to Felicity, just like he couldn’t say no to Emmy. Now he had another daughter, and Oliver already knew that he was completely screwed.

“So what’s her name now?” William asked, looking at his father and stepmother with perked up eyebrows.

Oliver looked at Felicity for a moment, who smiled at him with eyes full of admiration. Then he turned his gaze towards William and replied, “Her name is Camille Olivia Queen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the next weeks there will hopefully be an update each Wednesday. I thought you would enjoy a regular schedule. :)


	188. Always safe with me

Felicity rested her head against the frame of the door to the living room, a soft smile playing on her lips at the wonderful view she was met with. Oliver was lying on the couch, sleeping peacefully. Millie was resting on his chest, her forehead pressed to her daddy’s lips. They were covered with a fluffy blanket to keep them warm.

It had been two weeks since Millie had entered this world, turning out to be a little drama queen with her timing. She was healthy and perfect, though, and that was all that mattered. After six days in the hospital, Felicity had finally been able to take their little girl home a week ago. She, Oliver and the kids had enjoyed every minute with their youngest family member ever since. William was even coming here whenever school allowed it, so he could spend more time with his baby sister too.

It was beyond perfect.

When the doorbell rang, Felicity shot Oliver and Millie one last smile before she turned around and headed towards the door. They didn’t exactly expect any visitors – she and Oliver had actually hoped they and Millie would get some rest with Emmy and Tommy spending the afternoon with their grandparents – but Felicity also knew that their friends had already been waiting for the right time to visit. She had had several visitors while she had been in the hospital. Even their friends from Central City had come here to take a look at the youngest Queen. Felicity also knew that their friends had wanted to come visit them again, but Oliver had emphasized that they needed some time to get used to the new situation so often that their friends had probably decided it would be better to actually give them some time before visiting them at home.

That was why Felicity wasn’t surprised at all when she opened the door and found their friends and family gathered in front of the door. They had the weird habit of showing up all at the same time, probably thinking they couldn’t be rejected when they showed up as a huge group. It wasn’t like Felicity had planned on telling them to leave anyway. She loved when they were all together, spending some quality time as friends and family without any mission bringing them together.

“Hey, what are all of you doing here?” Felicity asked with a knowing smile since there was no denying why they had come here.

“Well, we figured you had enough time to get used to your new princess,” Thea said, “which is why we decided it was time to visit you or rather her.”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “Come in.”

Thea stepped into the house first, dragging Roy, who only had the time to quickly lift his hand and wave at Felicity shortly, behind her immediately. Laurel followed them quickly, telling Felicity, “I’ll greet you properly later. I need to make sure I get to hold my goddaughter before Roy does.”

“Well, that means you only get a longer hug from me,” John said, stepping in front of Felicity. He put his arms around her shoulders and pulled her in for a tight hug. “Hi, Mama Bear.”

“Hi, John,” Felicity replied with a smile.

When John released her from the hug, he put his hands to her face and looked at her for a long moment. He kissed her forehead before he asked, “Where’s Oliver?”

“Sleeping on the couch,” Felicity explained. “He is still recovering from the birth.”

While John huffed out a laugh, Barry frowned as he was stepping in front of Felicity. “Why? It’s not like he had to do much.”

“Hey, he did a lot,” Felicity replied, slapping Barry’s shoulder playfully, before she pulled him into a quick hug.

“I did a lot when Tommy was born,” Barry replied, “and I didn’t need any rest at all.”

“We’ve all heard the story a lot of times, Barry,” Iris said, rolling her eyes and pushing Barry out of the way, so she and Caitlin could hug Felicity at the same time.

“Congratulations once more,” Caitlin said and kissed Felicity’s cheek before she followed the others inside.

“So?” Lyla asked, being the last to step into the house and pulling Felicity into her arms without any hesitation. “Did you settle in with Millie?”

“Yes, absolutely.”

Felicity tightened her hold on Lyla. Though her friend hadn’t mentioned it when she had come to the hospital to visit her there a few days ago, Felicity knew that it couldn’t be easy for Lyla. She and John had been trying for another baby for so long, but it just hadn’t worked and eventually they had given up. Lyla had said that it was okay because they had Sara, so they had all they really wanted and needed. Yet Felicity doubted that it was that easy. She knew that Lyla was still a little disappointed that it just hadn’t worked out.

“How are you doing?” Felicity asked, not letting go of Lyla.

“I’m getting along,” Lyla said with a low sigh, knowing exactly what Felicity’s question was referring to. “I have John and Sara and they are all I need.”

The two women stayed in the hug for only a moment longer before they pulled apart, still staying close, though. Felicity looked at her friend carefully, finding that the smile on the older woman’s lips was an honest one.

Arm in arm the two friends headed further into the home, finding the others gathered in the living room close to the door. Laurel, Roy and Thea were standing a little closer to Oliver, huddling together and talking to each other with whispered voices.

“Hey, if you dare to take her from him while he is sleeping, fine,” Roy said to Laurel, holding out his hands in front of him defensively. “I am just saying that I learned my lesson when Emmy was a baby, and I am too young to die yet, so I am definitely not going to take her from him.”

Laurel pursed her lips, shooting a gaze at Oliver, who was still lying unmoving on the couch. She seemed to weigh her options for a moment before she finally looked at Thea. “Can’t you take Millie and give her to us or rather to me? You’re his sister. He is not going to kill you.”

Felicity pressed her lips together, suppressing a chuckle at the way John rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“Well, unfortunately I think that even I wouldn’t be allowed to take his child from him,” Thea said with low voice. “Besides, when Ollie’s sleeping, he can be unpredictable.”

“Well, it’s a good thing Oliver is not sleeping then,” Felicity said out loud.

All their friends looked at her for a moment before they turned their gazes to Oliver, who was still lying their unmoving. He might be able to fool the others, but Felicity knew him better. There was no way he hadn’t woken when the doorbell had rung or that he had fallen back asleep with all the people in the room. Oliver might be able to sleep better than when he had just come back from the island, but there was no way that he was sleeping that soundly.

“Of course I’m sleeping,” he claimed with grumbling voice.

“Yes, of course,” Felicity replied to that, rolling her eyes. She approached Oliver with three steps, taking Millie from him carefully and holding her out for their friends. “There you got her.”

“I’ll take her first,” Laurel hurried to say, already approaching Felicity. She took Millie from Felicity carefully, pulling her close. She looked down at her with a smile. “Hi, Millie. Great to see you again, little Goddaughter.”

Felicity beckoned for Oliver to sit up and make room on the couch. Growling lowly, he scooted to the other end of the couch. As soon as he had made himself comfortable there, he took Felicity’s hand and tucked at it, so she ended up sitting in his lap. His lips pressed to the side of her neck, caressing her soft skin. Meanwhile their friends all made themselves comfortable on the other seats. John and Roy got some chairs from the dining room, so everyone could sit.

Felicity pulled her legs to Oliver’s thighs and moved her arm around the back of his neck as she was leaning back against his chest. Oliver’s head came to rest on her chest with a smile, his stubble scratching against her skin. Smiling, Felicity moved her fingers into his short hair, stroking it gently. She rested her chin on the top of his head with a quiet sigh and looked at their friends.

“Where is Cisco?” she asked with a frown.

“I think his encounter with Emmy last week and that one time when he was holding Tommy for the first time a few years ago was too much for him,” Barry replied with a wide grin.

“That’s why I love Emmy,” Oliver said, the amusement audible in his voice. “She is already keeping the guys away from Millie. She is going to be a great help the next forty years. Ouch!”

Oliver bent his head back to look at Felicity with a frown. He rubbed the back of his head that Felicity had slapped quite forcefully before.

“You know that Emmy is not supposed to be this protective over her little sister. If she is chasing friends of ours off now, it’s getting way out of hand.”

“She just enjoys being a sister,” Oliver replied.

“She-“

“Well, to be honest Cisco just caught a cold and doesn’t want to infect Millie,” Caitlin explained before Felicity could say anything more.

Oliver’s eyes snapped towards her. “It would have been nice if you could have said that _before_ she hit me.”

“Why? It was totally worth seeing that,” Barry replied with a wide grin plastered to his lips.

“I-“

“Where are Emmy and Tommy by the way?” Iris asked, interrupting Oliver before a real fight could break loose. Not that that would have happened if you asked Felicity. Oliver and Barry just liked teasing each other. “I got some little presents for them.”

“Sorry, they are spending some time with my mom and Quentin,” Felicity explained. “We felt like Millie could need some rest from them and the other way around. They are really hyper since we took Millie home from the hospital.”

“Of course,” Thea replied. “It’s always exciting with a new baby in the house.”

“Does Millie make it hard for you?” Iris asked.

Felicity and Oliver both chuckled, so everyone was looking at them. Roy quickly used the opportunity to sneak Millie from Laurel’s arms. The godmother released a low groan, but eventually she turned her attention back to Oliver and Felicity.

“So what did that laughter mean?” Caitlin asked.

“Millie is the easiest child in the world,” Oliver explained. “When he put the children to bed last night, Felicity and I actually went back to Millie’s nursery to make sure that she is still breathing.”

“We are in no way used to a quiet baby like this,” Felicity added with a chuckle, shaking her head in disbelieve. “Emmy and Tommy were crying like crazy in their first months. I have no idea how we decided on another baby after we experienced them, but maybe Millie is our reward. She is an angel.”

“Well, I guess that makes it easier to find babysitters,” John said, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“I volunteer!” Laurel, Thea and Barry all called out in chorus, lifting their hands.

Oliver chuckled. “Sorry, guys, but it will take some time before I will give Millie away for even a few hours.”

“The time right now is all for our family,” Felicity confirmed, nodding her head.

At her words Oliver angled his head back once more. He looked at her with a wide smile. The adoration in his eyes made Felicity’s heart stumble for a few seconds. His arms tightened on her, wordlessly confirming her words. The next weeks were solely for their family – no Arrow work, no QI work. Slowly Felicity leaned down and brushed her lips against Oliver’s.

“So the kids are adapting to the new situation?” Lyla interrupted them loudly, probably knowing exactly how deep Oliver and Felicity were in the bubble the kiss created around them.

Felicity quickly pulled back. She pressed her lips together, swiping her tongue over her bottom lip to savor Oliver’s taste on them. She looked at their friends who all gave them the usual look when they caught them making out, but Felicity just smiled.

“Emmy loves having another little sister, and I think William enjoys it too,” Oliver responded to Lyla’s question.

Felicity nodded. “Yes, absolutely. Tommy might need a little more time.”

“Trouble with my little boy?” Barry asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “He is a little clingier than usually, and he doesn’t really understand why Millie needs so much care.”

“Emmy tries to explain it to him.”

“But he really doesn’t understand,” Felicity ended Oliver’s sentence, shrugging her shoulders once more. “Since we brought her home, he came downstairs every morning, asking who Millie is and what she’s doing here.”

“At the beginning he was really excited because Emmy was, but I guess the fact that Emmy’s and his parents’ attention are now have to be shared with another human being is not really something he enjoys.”

“Hopefully he will adjust,” Felicity said with a low sigh.

“Let’s just give it some time,” Oliver suggested.

Felicity looked at Oliver, seeing the reassurance in his eyes. They had talked about Tommy and his troubles with the new situation as recently as last night. Oliver knew Felicity was worried, and he had admitted that he was a little worried too, but the situation was still very new, so maybe Tommy just needed some more time.

After a short peck to each other’s lips, Oliver and Felicity both looked back at their friends. Everyone except for John, who was chuckling soundlessly, and Lyla, who was just smiling, looked at them with incredulous expressions on their faces.

“What?” Felicity asked, her eyes widening slightly.

Most of them times when someone looked at her like that it was because she had made one of her innuendos. She was quite sure that she hadn’t made any, though, so there was no reason why her friends should look at her like that.

“God, it’s so annoying when you are finishing each other’s sentences,” Roy said, rolling his eyes.

“And this whole talking like we are not here,” Laurel adds, shaking her head.

Felicity pressed her lips together guiltily, knowing their friends were right. She and Oliver had this habit of getting lost in each other’s voices and kisses, basically just in each other in general.

Yet John only kept shaking his head, chuckling. He didn’t need to say it for Felicity to know what he was thinking. Oliver and Felicity had always been like that and they probably always would be. For someone who knew the couple longer than everyone else a scene like this was just no surprise.

Oliver rested his head back to Felicity’s chest, and she kissed his hair shortly. When her chin came to rest on the crown of Oliver’s head, Felicity’s eyes met John’s. He smiled at her and winked before he cleared his throat and looked over at Roy. “Okay, come on, man, that little lady is going to be mine for the next couple of minutes.”


	189. Troubles adapting

“I thought we established that you aren’t allowed to look at me like that until the doctor gave his go for us to have sex again.”

Oliver chuckled. “I think you remember it wrong.”

“Oh really?” Felicity asked, shooting him a glance in the mirror.

“Yeah, really,” he replied, nodding his head. The grin on his lips widened. “You told me I couldn’t look at you like this until the doctor gives his go for us to have sex again, and I decided to ignore that because I know I could never not look at you like this even if I tried.”

Felicity’s eyes met his in the mirror. She pressed her lips together and turned around, leaning back against the bathroom counter and crossing her arms in front of her chest. Thanks to the thin material of his large shirt that she was wearing Oliver could see her nipples pressing against the fabric from under the shirt. He licked his lips at the sight before he looked back into Felicity’s eyes, finding her slightly scolding eyes on him. Oliver’s grin widened once more.

“It’s only been a little bit more than four weeks,” Felicity told him, shaking her head with a low chuckle. “Pull yourself together. You will probably have to wait just as long once more.”

Shaking her head at him, Felicity turned back around to the mirror. She grabbed her scrunchie and started tying her head up. When she lifted her arms high, so she could pull her hair together, the hem of the shirt she was wearing was rising. He could see a little bit of her panties that only insufficiently covered the full cheeks of her butt, and Oliver felt his mouth watering at the sight.

When Felicity turned around to him this time, she stepped forward until she could lean in the door frame. She chuckled, shaking her head.

“Oliver, be nice.”

“I am nice,” Oliver promised with a chuckle of his own.

Felicity only perked up his eyebrows. When he licked his lips, though, her eyes flickered down to them for the break of a second. She locked her eyes with him again, finding his grin widened even more due to her reaction to him licking his lips. Pursing her own lips, Felicity grabbed the towel that was nearest to her and threw it in his direction. It would have missed his body by far, but Oliver caught the towel nonetheless.

“Does everything always have to be about sex with you?” she asked, but whatever reproach there might have been supposed to be in her voice was muffled by her chuckle. “Really, Oliver, we’ve been together for seven years and been married for six of them. You really should control your sex need a little more, my dear.”

“Oh, you think?” Oliver asked. When Felicity nodded, Oliver explained, “I am not the one who was that needy last year that I had to give a certain part of your body a name to humiliate it when it needed a break.”

Felicity pursed her lips once again, throwing another towel in his direction. This time it at least came close to his head. Oliver caught in the air and easily dropped it to the bedroom floor thought, earning him a roll of her eyes from Felicity.

“For the record hormones had taken over my body and little Oliver was annoyingly little help to get them under control. Actually he wasn’t helping at all.”

“You mean because he didn’t give into your crazy state all the time?”

“Be careful, Mister, or I might help little Oliver to get a much longer rest,” Felicity explained. Oliver gasped for breath dramatically, but he didn’t say a word. Felicity continued looking at him for a moment before she said, “You are still looking at me like that.”

“Who says the adoring expression in my eyes is about sex at all?” Oliver asked. He pressed his lips together when Felicity cocked her head. He chuckled. “Okay, maybe it’s a little about sex. It’s way more about loving and admiring you, though.”

“Oh, you are being sappy tonight.”

Oliver smiled, shaking his head. “Just honest.”

“It’s sappy,” Felicity whispered with a widening smile on her lips.

When Oliver reached out a hand for her, Felicity approached him. She laced her fingers through his, and with a firm tug on her hand, Oliver pulled her onto the bed and rolled himself on top of her. Felicity’s legs encompassed his hips, her free hand slipping into his hair to pull him down for a kiss.

Their lips brushed against each other’s teasingly, never really meeting in a kiss. Oliver moved the tip of his nose along Felicity’s and she chuckled in response. Her warm breath ghosted over his skin, and when her fingers moved through his short stubble to caress his cheek, Oliver leaned down and finally kissed Felicity for real. His lips pressed to hers gently, his tongue swiping over her bottom lip. Sighing quietly, Felicity opened her lips to him, and Oliver stroked his tongue against hers.

They kissed lazily for a long moment before Oliver ended the kiss with a short peck to Felicity’s lips. He propped himself up on his forearms, looking at Felicity with a smile. Her shining eyes took in his face and when Oliver stoked his fingertips over her cheek, Felicity leaned into his touch until his hand rested against the side of her face. He moved his thumb over her bottom lip, and Felicity kissed it, making him smile.

“We need to talk about Tommy,” Felicity said after moment, slowly moving her hand up and down Oliver’s back.

Oliver nodded. “Yes, absolutely. He is not adapting to this at all.”

Felicity sighed, circling Oliver’s waist with her arms. “Do you think we did anything wrong?”

“I don’t know,” Oliver admitted honestly. “With Emmy it was so easy. She loved Tommy and Millie as soon as she knew about them. She was pushing for another baby before we even decided on Millie. Tommy is the middle child, though. The internet says it’s always harder for them. They aren’t the fist, they aren’t the last. They can have trouble with that.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “Are you still cheating on me with that moms’ chat?”

Oliver bit his tongue. He had been quite active in that small moms’ chat a few months ago because he loved exchanging experiences with other parents. Okay, admittedly, he was the only father in that chat, but it wasn’t his fault that was the case. Oliver also knew that it wasn’t the fact that most people in the chat were women and rather the fact that he had spent some sleepless nights chatting with them that Felicity loved teasing him about.

“I was just asking other parents for their opinion on what we should do with Tommy,” Oliver explained. “You know I limited my time in that chat.”

“Which is nothing you had to do by the way,” Felicity replied. “I know you enjoyed it, so-“

Oliver shook his head. “When I can’t sleep, you are all I need.”

Felicity smiled, tightened her arms around his waist. “I am just saying that maybe you would like to spend some more time giving educational advice. You could run your own blog or-“

“Felicity, I gave the CEO position to you because I wanted to be a dad, not because I wanted to have a different job or take time for another time-consuming hobby. I already have one at night, remember?” Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, frowning slightly. Oliver sighed and pecked her lips. “I am sorry. I am worried about Tommy. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”

“It’s okay,” Felicity assured. “I just don’t want you to think that I am pushing you to do something you don’t want to do.”

“I know you are not,” Oliver replied.

“Good.”

“We really need to talk about Tommy,” Oliver directed their conversation back to what they really had to talk about.

Felicity nodded, whispering, “Yeah.”

Tommy’s behavior had really been worrying him these last weeks since Felicity and Millie had come home from the hospital. While Tommy had been quite excited about his little sister at the start, his excitement had slowly faded away. He had started questioning why Millie was in his home in the first place, coming down every morning of her first week home to ask his mommy who that tiny human being was and when she was going to go away again. Oliver and Felicity had both thought that Tommy just needed some time to adjust, but Millie was home for three weeks now and it seemed to get worse on a daily basis.

Tommy wanted his family back the way it had been before Millie had joined it. When he had snuggled up to Felicity on the couch a few days back, he had moved his hands over Felicity’s rounded stomach. He had looked at her with a frown and asked if there was another baby in there. When Felicity had negated, he had very firmly told her that her belly needed to go away then. Oliver had been slightly worried because Felicity had had some issues about her body after Tommy’s birth. The only thing she had worried about, though, had been Tommy.

These last days Tommy had started to have terrible temper tantrums. He dropped to the floor, banging his head against the hardwood. He cried and screamed until his head was red. Felicity and Oliver had tried to ignore his behavior at first, thinking that if Tommy realized that his behavior wasn’t helping him to get what he wanted, he might stop. Oliver had read that it might help because Tommy was just adapting Millie’s behavior because she usually got attention when she was crying. Ignoring didn’t help, though. It actually got even worse to a point where Tommy’s breathing started faltering during all the crying and screaming and he ended up gasping for breath desperately.

Neither Oliver nor Felicity knew what to do. They had talked to their pediatrician, but she had only said that Tommy needed time and temper tantrums weren’t unusual in his age anyway. That hadn’t been a satisfying answer for them at all. They needed to find a way to deal with this because apart from the situation being exhausting for them, it had to be unbearable for Tommy.

“I have no idea what to do,” Oliver admitted with a sigh.

Felicity nodded. “Neither do I. I just… We read books with him about being a big brother. We tried to involve him in Millie’s routine and accepted when he didn’t want to be involved in it. We-“

“I know,” Oliver said, taking one of Felicity’s hands from his back and lacing his fingers through hers. He rested their joint fingers on the mattress, squeezing her hand gently. He could see the frustration and helplessness in Felicity’s eyes, feeling them mirrored deep within him. “I know.”

“We really need to find a way how to deal with this,” Felicity explained.

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

Felicity moved the hand that was still resting on his back up and down slightly. She bit down on her bottom lip, thinking without saying a word for a long moment.

“Do you think we aren’t giving him enough attention?” she asked after awhile. “I mean with the excitement of a new baby sometimes the older kids get pushed back too much and…”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, looking up at him with honest question and open doubt in her eyes. It was one of a parent’s biggest fears, right? Oliver had thought about the same thing already, and hadn’t found an answer yet, so he thought carefully about this once more now.

He and Felicity had been very careful to make sure Emmy and Tommy got to spend enough time with both of their parents. They made sure they all had breakfast and dinner together. Oliver and Felicity alternated between who read the children their bedtime story. One night it was Oliver, the next Felicity. Of course Felicity was quite occupied with nursing Millie regularly, but they always made sure she still had enough time for Tommy and Emmy. It hadn’t been a problem with Emmy, either when Tommy had been born nor now.

“I think we are doing everything we can right now,” Oliver said honestly, “but maybe that means that we just have to find a way to be even better.”

Felicity looked at him amorously. It actually made Oliver’s stomach flutter. He squeezed her hand and let his fingers run through her hair. Just when he was about to lean down and kiss her, Millie’s cries interrupted the silence over the baby monitor.

“Ah, that’s the call for her bedtime snack,” Felicity said, “right in time, so we can go to bed after that too before she wakes up for her midnight snack.”

“Sounds great,” Oliver replied and rolled off of Felicity. “I will keep the bed warm and-“

Oliver interrupted himself when Millie’s cries mixed with Tommy’s shouts for his mommy and daddy. Sighing, Oliver rolled himself off the bed.

“You take care of Tommy, and I take care of Millie,” Felicity suggested.

“Yeah,” Oliver replied.

They left the bedroom together and walked to the nurseries side by side. Oliver put a hand to Felicity’s lower back and kissed her cheek chastely before he left her side to open the door to Tommy’s nursery.

“Dada!” Tommy called out immediately.

“Hey, Buddy,” Oliver said gently.

He closed the door behind him, switching on the dimmed light. Tommy got up in his crib and reached out his arms for his dad. Oliver approached his son, lifted him into his arms and against his chest. Tommy’s little arms wrapped around his daddy’s neck, and he rested his head against Oliver’s broad shoulder with a quiet sob.

“Dada, where’s mama?”

“Mama needs to feed Millie,” Oliver whispered and kissed Tommy’s temple. “Remember? Millie is very small, so she needs a lot of food to grow.”

“But I want mama,” Tommy whined. His hands clawed around the fabric of his daddy’s shirt, holding him to him, though he repeated once more, “I want mama.”

Oliver hushed Tommy gently, carrying him up and down his room, while rubbing his hand up and down Tommy’s back comfortingly. He kissed Tommy’s temple every now and then, hoping to calm the little boy down.

Oliver’s eyes fell onto the crib. He and Felicity had planned on getting Tommy out of the crib and into a child’s bed soon after Millie’s birth. With everything happening right now more change for Tommy seemed to be a terrible idea, though. They would have to wait until Tommy was getting along with the way things were right now before they changed even more for him. What Tommy needed was time and patience, and that was what they would give him.

When Oliver stepped towards the window, he looked outside into the night sky. Tommy had calmed down by now. He wasn’t wining anymore. Instead he was relaxing in Oliver’s arms which usually took a lot longer. Millie’s cries had stopped by now too since Felicity was probably feeding her. It was probably helping Tommy to relax.

“Hey, Buddy,” Oliver said with whispered voice. “Look at the stars.”

Tommy put his hands to Oliver’s shoulders and pushed himself a little more upright, so he could look outside at the stars. His big blue eyes took in the view in front of him carefully. His head leaned against Oliver’s, and his little fingers stroked over his daddy’s stubble that he had strongly rejected a few years ago.

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?”

Tommy didn’t answer for a long time. It took almost a minute before he asked, “We see star shoots?”

“Shooting starts?” Oliver repeated. “I don’t know. Maybe if we stay here a little longer. Should we stay here a little longer?”

Tommy nodded, his eyes still directed outside to the stars. Oliver took his son’s face in, seeing him truly relaxed. The boy seemed interesting in the stars which Oliver felt was a good thing because lately Tommy had lost his interest in stones. He had been obsessed about them a year ago but seemed highly uninterested in them lately.

“Tommy?” Oliver asked quietly after a moment. Tommy turned his gaze to his daddy, looking at him. Smiling, Oliver moved a hand over his son’s head. “Mommy and daddy love you very much, you know that?”

To Oliver’s surprise Tommy leaned forward and kissed his daddy’s lips. Then he wrapped his arms back around Oliver’s neck and hugged him tightly.

“Love you, Dada.”

Oliver closed his eyes, holding Tommy to him closely. It felt unbelievably good to have him so close. Given that he and Felicity had doubted their parental skills lately, Oliver was more than relieved to know that his son at least knew that his parents loved them.

“Dada?” Tommy asked after a moment, pulling back slightly. “Mama see the stars?”

Oliver smiled and kissed Tommy’s lips shortly. “How about you get a little time with just mommy and you watching the stars soon? Would you like that?”

Tommy smiled. “Yes.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied with a smile, “then you will get that.”


	190. Under the starry sky

Felicity grabbed her mug of tea and held it between both of her hands, so the warm porcelain could warm her fingers. She leaned back into the cushions of the couch and with a smile on her lips she watched William gently rocking his baby sister in his arms.

“I can’t believe she is almost one and a half months old now,” William said, shortly lifting his gaze from Millie to look at Felicity. “It still feels like she made her entrance into this world just yesterday.”

“I know,” Felicity replied with a smile. “Time just flies when they are this little.”

William grabbed a pillow from the seat next to him, put it on his crossed legs and rested Millie on top of it, so she was perfectly comfortable. His hands gently grabbed her legs, playing with them slightly.

“Was it the same when Emmy and Tommy were this young?” William asked after awhile, looking at Felicity.

She chuckled. “Oh yes. I have no idea where time has gone with Emmy. One moment she was this tiny little baby in my arms and suddenly she is walking around and talking and Oliver and I have to look for preschools. It is so crazy.”

“She starts kindergarten this year, right?”

Felicity nodded. “She doesn’t talk about anything else anymore. She is so excited about it.”

“She will stop being excited when she is older,” William replied. “School sucks.”

“Well, if she takes after her father regarding her attitude towards school, then that’s probably true,” Felicity said with a quiet sigh, “but I hope it will take a little before she changes her mind on that.”

William nodded, lowering his eyes back to Millie. The little girl was yawning, looking around with her big blue eyes without focusing on anything. Usually this time during the evening was the only time that Millie would maybe start crying though there wasn’t anything she really needed. She wasn’t crying much except for when she was hungry or needed a diaper change. Today she seemed completely relaxed. Felicity was grateful for that because that way she could enjoy some time with William. The two of them barely ever had time with only each other. Usually Oliver or the kids were around them almost all the time.

“Do you know when dad, Emmy and Tommy are going to get back?” William asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “No, not really. The show was supposed to take a little bit more than an hour, but Oliver wanted to stay at the astronomical observatory with them a little longer. Tommy loves watching stars.”

“Is he getting along better now?”

“I hope so,” Felicity replied with a low sigh.

Tommy had had real troubles adapting to the new situation with a baby in the family. He had been clingy and he had had terrible temper tantrums. Neither Oliver nor Felicity had known what to do. Tommy just didn’t want another child in the family. Since Oliver and Felicity had discovered their son’s interest in stars, though, they had decided to use that to help Tommy adjust. Felicity had taken him to see the stars outside last Wednesday, and Oliver was at the observatory with Emmy and Tommy to see the stars right now. Tommy still hadn’t been as excited about his little sister as Emmy or William have been from the start, but at least his temper tantrums had calmed down and he was able to share his siblings’ and parents’ time and attention with Millie now.

Maybe Tommy had really felt like he hadn’t gotten enough attention Felicity thought. She and Oliver had given what they had thought were their best, but it had been so easy with Emmy that maybe they just hadn’t tried hard enough to make it work for Tommy. Felicity could just hope that Tommy would still be able to learn to love his little sister instead of just accepting her presence.

“How is your mother?” Felicity asked after a moment of silence.

“Fine,” William replied. “She has a new boyfriend.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard. Are you okay with that?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I want her to be happy, so…”

Felicity smiled. Those were strong words from a fourteen-year-old. She remembered how she had felt about her mother’s boyfriends before Quentin, but then again Donna was very different from Felicity. Other than the fact that they were both single mothers, Donna and Samantha didn’t seem to have a lot in common.

“Do you like your mother’s boyfriend?”

Again William shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know him that well yet. He could be a nice guy, but… I don’t know yet. It probably just needs time to get used to him.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “If you ever need someone to talk to or something, you know your dad and I are always here for you.”

William smiled. “Thanks, Felicity.”

“Sure,” she replied with a smile. “I was raised by a single mom myself, so I know a lot about that.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes before they heard the keys in the lock of the front door, telling them that Oliver, Emmy and Tommy were back. The next moment the kids were already running into the living room. Without any hesitation Emmy jumped onto the couch, kneeled down next to William and leaned over Millie to kiss her gently. Tommy meanwhile came running towards Felicity, crawling into her lap.

“Mama, we seed stars!”

“You saw stars?” Felicity corrected with a wide smile about her son’s excitement. “That sounds great. Did you have fun?”

Tommy nodded eagerly. “We go again?”

“I am sure we can go again one day, just not right now. “ Felicity replied and smiled, nodding her head. “Did you see shooting stars?”

“Yes!” Tommy replied.

“That sounds like a lot of fun.”

“You come the next time, Mama?” Tommy asked.

Felicity nodded. “Yes, of course. If we go again, I will come with you.”

Tommy smiled happily and babbled about everything he had seen. It was one of the rare moments that Tommy spoke more than only a few words or sentences. He wasn’t the most talkative in the family, but it was hard to get something to say between Felicity’s and Emmeline’s babbles, so nobody could exactly blame him. It was obviously the ladies were the talkers in the family.

While Felicity was helping Tommy out of his jacket and shoes, listening to his excited words and just asking a question every now and then, Oliver stepped into the living room. He walked over to William, squeezing his son’s shoulder and leaning over him to kiss Millie’s rosy cheek.

Once Tommy stopped talking, Oliver said, “You know, buddy, mommy and I got a surprise for you upstairs.”

“For me?” Tommy asked.

Felicity nodded. “Yes, for you. Mommy and William prepared it while you have been watching the stars with Emmy and daddy.”

“I wanna see!” Tommy said excitedly.

“Yeah, come on, we are going to show you,” Felicity suggested, getting up with Tommy on her hip. The boy tightened his legs around her body and put his arms around her shoulder. Felicity looked at William. “Can I leave you alone with the girls for a moment?”

“Sure,” William replied with the proud smile of a big brother.

“I make sure he does everything right with Millie,” Emmy announced.

Oliver rumpled up Emmy’s hair. The girl giggled, holding her hands to her head until Oliver stopped. When she looked at her dad, Oliver pointed a finger at her playfully.

“You are going to listen to your brother,” he told her.

Emmy giggled. “Yes, Daddy.”

Oliver winked at her before walking to the door, stepping out of the living room right before Felicity. Together they went upstairs to Tommy’s nursery. Felicity let the little boy down to the floor and held his hand, smiling at the excitement in her son’s eyes. Oliver opened the door for them, and Felicity led Tommy through the dark of his room to the cozy corner where mother and son lay down together side by side.

“What surprise, Mama?” Tommy asked.

Felicity leaned forward, so her lips were resting against Tommy’s ear when she whispered, “Ask daddy to switch on the special light.”

“Dada, de special light please!”

Even in the dark Felicity could see Oliver smile. He reached out his hand for the little lamp on the small table next to the door and flicked the switch.

“Stars!” Tommy exclaimed at the view of the dimmed star protection on the walls and ceiling of his room. “Stars!”

Oliver chuckled, approaching them and lying down next to Tommy on the other side. He laced his fingers with Felicity’s on Tommy’s stomach and said, “Yes, you have your own stars in your room now. Is that cool?”

“Yes!” Tommy replied, his wide eyes taking in the lights. “Stars everywhere.”

Felicity’s eyes met Oliver’s gaze over the crown of their son’s head, and they smiled at each other. Oliver swiped his thumb over the knuckles of Felicity’s hand and squeezed her fingers. For a long moment neither of them said a word. They all stayed silent, taking in the lights and enjoying this moment.

“Hey, Tommy?” Felicity asked after awhile and smiled when Tommy turned his head to look at her immediately. “Daddy and I know that it was a little difficult for you lately. It’s not easy to become a big brother… not that I would enough about that because-“

“When daddy became a big brother,” Oliver interrupted Felicity before she could talk herself to deep into that, “daddy didn’t know what to do either. Aunt Thea was so small and she really couldn’t do much except for crying. Then she grew older, and daddy got to do a lot of great stuff with her. We could play together, and I could tell her a lot of the things that I knew. We were exactly like Emmy and you are. Millie just needs to be a little older, and then you can show her everything you know just like Emmy did for you.”

Felicity smiled at Oliver amorously. She loved how he was with their kids. He was the best daddy in the world, always doing the right things and always finding the right words.

Tommy sighed quietly. “How long?”

Oliver pressed his lips together. “She will be able to do some things sooner, but some things will take longer.”

Tommy nodded quietly, looking at his mother. “Can I show her de stars?”

Felicity smiled. “Yes, of course. Do you want to get Emmy, William and Millie upstairs to see your stars now?”

Tommy nodded eagerly and immediately got up to run downstairs and get them. Felicity turned onto her side and looked at Oliver.

“Do you think it will get better now?” she asked.

Oliver sighed. “I don’t know, but I certainly hope so. Maybe Tommy just thought he was getting another Emmy, so this whole baby thing confused him.”

Felicity nodded, looking around in the room. “These stars really are beautiful.”

“Yes, they are,” Oliver agreed. “It was one of the best ideas you ever had.”

“And I have a lot of good ideas,” Felicity added.

“Yes, absolutely.” Oliver nodded his head. He moved his arm around her waist, putting his warm hand against the small of her back. “I love you, you know that?”

Felicity gave him a warm smile. “I had an idea, but it never hurts to hear it.”

“I love you,” Oliver whispered right before his lips met hers in a slow and gentle kiss.

“I love you too,” Felicity replied when they pulled apart only a moment later.

When Tommy took his siblings into the room, he told his parents to make room in the cozy corner, so they could all lie down. Oliver and Felicity moved apart, so Tommy could lie down next to Oliver, Emmy next to Felicity and William in the middle of them with Millie resting on his chest. There was only little room, but it made it all the more cozy.

“It was a good idea, Mommy,” Emmy whispered to Felicity. “Tommy loves the stars.”

“You think?” Felicity asked back in a whisper and Emmy nodded. Felicity kissed Emmy’s forehead. “Thank you, Baby.”

While Emmy was moving closer to Felicity, snuggling her cheek up to her mother’s breast like Oliver usually cuddled with Felicity, Tommy rested his head on the side of William’s body. He took one of Millie’s hands and pointed at the ceiling.

“Look, Millie,” he said quietly. “Stars are pretty. You like stars too?”

Holding Emmy to her tightly, Felicity watched Oliver stroking a hand over Tommy’s dark hair. He looked at him with a smile, his eyes full of love.

“I am sure she likes them too once she is older.”

Tommy smiled happily and kissed Millie’s cheek gently. “I tell you everything.”

While Tommy snuggled up to his dad, Oliver and Felicity exchanged meaningful gazes. Maybe they had finally found the key for Tommy to be okay again.


	191. The list

“Are the kids asleep?” Felicity asked, not looking up from her laptop.

“Yes, they are all napping together in Millie’s nursery,” Oliver replied.

Felicity felt him step behind her and wrap her ponytail around his hand, so he could angle her head back and lean over her face to kiss her softly. She sighed into the kiss, even sliding a hand into his short hair to keep him against her. He nuzzled her nose for a moment after their lips parted before he stroked his fingertips over the side of her neck, eliciting goosebumps there, and turned his gaze to the screen of her laptop.

“What are you doing?” he asked, propping his forearms on the back of the couch behind Felicity, and pressed a kiss to her hair.

“Getting used to working again,” she replied with a low sigh. “I need to work through this before I get back on Monday.”

Felicity tried to focus back on the report, but with Oliver’s fingertips still moving up and down on the side of her neck it was hard to focus on anything but his touch. The fact that she could feel his warm breath ghosting over the other her cheek and chin didn’t exactly make it any easier either.

“Do you really have to go back to work already?”

“It’s already been two weeks longer than I planned,” Felicity said with a sigh, resting her head back to look at Oliver again. “I think it’s time for me to go back to work. I will keep my working hours under control, no crazy work schedule. I promise.”

Oliver hummed, moving his fingertips from the side of her neck to her cheek. She could feel in the warmth that spread there that she was probably blushing which was ridiculous given how long she and Oliver had been together and married by now.

“I am still going to miss you,” Oliver told her.

Felicity smiled. “I am going to miss you too.”

Oliver kissed her lips once more and trailed a path of kisses from the tip of her nose to her forehead. His fingers caressed both sides of her cheek for a long moment before he pulled further away.

“I am going to leave you to your work now,” Oliver stated.

While Felicity focused back on the laptop, Oliver made himself comfortable next to her. She leaned against him instinctively, and Oliver wrapped his arm around her shoulders in response. Felicity was halfway through the page when she felt the prickling in the back of her neck. She didn’t even turn her eyes off the screen. Instead she blindly reached out her hand, put her fingers to his chin and turned his face away from her.

“Stop staring at me. It’s distracting.”

“Sorry,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “I just like to watch beauty.”

Felicity shot him a quick look before she reached out her for her unused tablet on the couch next to her and held it out to Oliver. “Here, busy yourself with this.”

“I am allowed to play with your tablet?”

“If you damage it, I will forever hold a grudge against you,” Felicity warned and narrowed her eyes at Oliver. “Better treat the tablet with care.”

Oliver grinned about her love and care for her tech and took the tablet from Felicity’s fingers, promising, “I will treat them with the same care that I treat our children with.”

“You better do,” Felicity mumbled before she focused back on the report.

A part of her missed her work and was excited to get back behind the desk of Queen Industries and pour herself into work. A different part of her wanted everything to stay the way it was right now. Staying home with Oliver and the kids was great and she didn’t look forward to leaving them. She did miss her work, though. It was just really complicated and going back to work without going sky high with her working hours sounded like the best compromise.

She would make sure that she was going to be a good boss and continued to make good decisions that took the company to successful places without spending too little time with her kids. She had managed to do so before, so she would manage to continue with now again. The fact that they had one more child that needed her care and attention wasn’t going to change any of that, especially given that Felicity had Oliver’s full support for everything she did.

Felicity sighed, distantly massaging the tense muscle in the back of her neck, while she continued to go through the report. She really wanted to get this over with today, so she could use the weekend to completely focus on these last days before going back to work. The weekend was just for her family and-

“Felicity,” Oliver suddenly said next to her, and she lifted her gaze to look at him, finding him smirking at the screen of the tablet, “we are going to have so much fun.”

“Huh?” she asked, looking at him with a frown, before she cocked her head and smiled knowingly. “Oliver, in case you find another one of those websites to design baby onesies, I need to disappoint you. We already have more onesies than Millie can wear in her first year. You need to get a hold on that addiction.”

Oliver chuckled, only shooting her a short look over the edge of the tablet in his hand. “No, it’s not that though you have to admit that designing onesies is a lot of fun.”

“It stopped being fun when we realized that we don’t have enough room for all of them in Millie’s wardrobe,” Felicity reminded him, “which is why you cannot-“

“What’s _The punishment_?” Oliver interrupted her, frowning at the screen.

“What?”

“You wrote _The punishment_ on your list, and I wonder what exactly that means. The only thing that is added in parentheses here is _Little Oliver deserves it,_ ” Oliver explained and lowered the tablet a little, so he could look at her with a mischievous grin on his lips. “I would really like to know what you have planned for that.”

Felicity’s eyes widened. She opened and closed her mouth several times in a try to say something, but no word came out. When she was finally able to move, she quickly put her laptop to the couch table and crawled towards Oliver. Before she reached him, he already hurried to his feet, though. Without a beat of hesitation Felicity got onto her feet and jumped onto Oliver’s back, trying to take the tablet from his hands.

“That was not meant for your eyes!” she almost screeched. “Give that back to me!”

Oliver chuckled, effectively holding the tablet out of her sight. “No, no, no, hon. This was definitely meant for my eyes! You wouldn’t have written this list down if it wasn’t for- Ow!”

When Felicity pinched Oliver firmly in the side of his chest, he came to a stop. She used the moment that his surprise lasted to jump off his back and snatch he table from his fingers, quickly deleting the file. With a sigh of relief she pressed her tablet to her chest.

“Thank god.”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied, and when she opened her eyes to look at him, she saw that he was smirking. “Thank God I sent that list to myself via mail and saved it in the dropbox and iCloud.”

Felicity pursed her lips for only a short moment before she replied, “Good thing you told me. I will just hack myself into it and delete it.”

Oliver just shrugged his shoulders, his smirk widening. Felicity shot him a short gaze before concentrating on the tablet, quickly checking the last commands it had received. When she found what made Oliver grin like this she looked at him with wide eyes.

“You printed this?”

“Hell, yes,” he replied with a grin. “The papers are all in the printer upstairs. I will get them and hide them somewhere you will never find them and- No, no, no, you are staying here.”

Felicity had bolt, so she could run upstairs and destroy the printed list of her sexual fantasies before Oliver could take them and hide them from her. Before she could have taken even a single step, Oliver’s arms had already circled her waist and pulled her back against his chest, though. She knew she didn’t even have to try to get out of his arms. Oliver wouldn’t let go of her and she had to admit that it felt good being in his arms like this, especially when Oliver put his cheek against hers and slowly rubbed his stubble against her sensitive skin. Sighing contently, Felicity closed her eyes and leaned back in his arms.

“You told me you didn’t have a list,” he eventually whispered into her ear.

“I told you that a long time ago,” Felicity replied, turning her head to look at Oliver, “and I didn’t have a list at that time. Then I was pregnant and horny.”

“So you put the list together during your sexual overdrive?”

“I’d rather say I put it together in the time that you were unable to fulfill my sexual needs,” she told him with a teasing smile and lowered her hand to his cock, gently petting it over the fabric of his sweat pants. “You know, the time that Little Oliver refused to work properly?”

Oliver growled. “That was just because you were going crazy.”

“Yeah, tell yourself that if it makes you feel better, honey,” Felicity suggested and patted Oliver’s chest, looking at him with a teasing smile.

“I think the fact that you managed to write down 72 fantasies despite our creative and fulfilled sex life is proof that you were going crazy.”

“Creative and fulfilled?” Felicity asked, putting the tablet to the couch and turning around in Oliver’s arms, looking at him with a playfully challenging frown. “If that is what you have to tell yourself…”

Oliver narrowed his eyes at her, but when her grin widened, he just shook his head and rolled his eyes. Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes and put her hands around Oliver’s neck. Their lips met in a gentle kiss, and with a low sigh Felicity opened her lips to his, stroking her tongue against his.

As soon as their lips parted, Oliver bent down and wrapped an arm around the back of Felicity’s thighs, lifting her onto his shoulder. She released a mixture of a screech and a giggle, circling Oliver’s waist with her arms to hold onto him tightly.

“What are you doing?!”

“Since the doctor said it’s okay for us to have sex again, I am going to take you upstairs into our room and show you how creative and fulfilled our sex life is,” Oliver replied, the amusement audible in his voice. While he was taking the first steps to the stairs, he added with quiet voice, “I didn’t get to see all of your wishes yet, but I got a first impression on what you want, and I already found some parallels to the list of my fantasies.”

Felicity swallowed hard. The only reason why she had decided to create a list of her sexual fantasies had been because she had been incredibly horny, and she had felt like she was using her sexual energy for something useful by concentrating on creating a list like this. She hadn’t wanted Oliver to find it though she had to admit that the idea of playing out those fantasies with him was going to be a lot of fun.

As soon as the door of their bedroom closed behind them, Oliver put Felicity down on the soft carpet. He put his hands to her hips and walked her backwards until the back of her knees met the edge of the mattress and Felicity sat down on the bed. Instead of crawling onto the bed with her, Oliver took a quick step back and took his shirt off.

Releasing a quiet sound of approval, Felicity licked her lips and took in the sight of Oliver’s naked chest. His abs looked as good at him as ever. Felicity felt her fingertips prickling with the need to reach out her hand and stroke the soft skin that covered his hard muscles. She didn’t know why after the uncountable times she had seen him without a shirt her body still reacted to it strongly, but it did. It definitely did. Anyway, instead of giving into that need to touch him, Felicity leaned back onto her elbows and just looked at Oliver.

“Eager?” she asked.

Oliver chuckled, hooking his fingers into the waistband of his sweatpants and tugging them down, taking his boxers with them in one go. When the clothes pooled around his ankles, Oliver kicked them away easily, standing in front of her in all his naked glory and grinning at her smugly. Felicity made no attempt to move, though, and that made Oliver cock his head.

“Come on, undress yourself. Chop-chop!”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Chop-chop, hm? So needy.”

“Says the woman with the 72 unfulfilled sexual fantasies,” Oliver replied. “Well, 71 when we are finished here.”

Slowly Felicity pulled the hoodie she had stolen from Oliver this morning over her head and threw it somewhere into the room. She unclasped her bra and took it off, enjoying the way Oliver’s eyes darkened as he took in her breasts. Her nipples hardened slightly under his gaze. While she was starting to take off her sweatpants, Felicity cleared her throat, calling Oliver’s gaze away from the skin she was revealing and to her face.

“What exactly are you planning for us here?”

“I told you,” Oliver replied with a smirk. “We are going to explore a fantasy that we share.”

“And that fantasy is…?” Felicity asked.

She discarded her sweatpants on the floor carelessly and put her hands to the mattress behind her, leaning back and arching her back a little to bring her breasts into focus. She bit down on her tongue when she saw Oliver’s fingers twitch towards his cock but stopping himself before they could make contact with him. He growled quietly and put his hand flat to the side of his thigh and lifted his gaze back to her face.

“So?” Felicity prompted when Oliver didn’t speak. “What fantasy are we going to explore here and now?”

“We,” Oliver started, stepping closer to the bed and gesturing between him and Felicity, “are going masturbate together.”

Felicity pressed her lips together, pulling them into her mouth. She felt a blush spreading on her cheeks and taking a path down over her neck to the top of her chest. She knew it was ridiculous because Oliver had seen her naked so often and he had explored her body so carefully with his fingers, his lips and his tongue that really there was no reason to blush for her. She just couldn’t help it nonetheless. Sometimes she still blushed, and she knew that it always turned Oliver on.

“I don’t remember that wish on my list.”

Oliver grinned and leaned over Felicity, his hands resting on both sides next to her head on the mattress. His body was hovering over hers without any touch between them. Felicity took in a deep breath and released a low sigh when she felt her nipples brushing against his naked chest. She clenched her hands to fists in the sheets, never taking her eyes off Oliver’s face.

“Your list says you want to watch me touching myself and then coming inside of you,” Oliver told her. “I want to watch you touching yourself and getting yourself off. I just put those together which means telling you that we will masturbate together now.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. This was going to be the first time she and Oliver would have sex since Millie had been born and she had had the minor surgery to stitch up the damages Millie’s quick birth had caused. She knew that it would probably be a little uncomfortable or even slightly painful. If it wasn’t for Oliver’s detailed knowledge of her body and his considerate respect to each of her body’s reactions, she knew the first sex after birth might actually be more painful and more uncomfortable, though. Masturbating was definitely going to help easing them back into sexual intimacy.

“Are you okay with that?” Oliver asked, nuzzling her nose before pecking her lips shortly.

“Sure,” Felicity replied, smirking up at him. “That sounds like we are going to have a lot of fun.”

“That we will,” he responded.

Slowly Oliver bent his arms and lowered himself onto her. Felicity circled his hips with her legs, enjoying the contact of his hot cock between her folds. This was certainly the perfect turn-on to get her into the right mood. Oliver put his arms around her waist and rolled them around until they were lying in the middle of the bed.

Oliver deepened their kiss for a moment, stroking his tongue against hers one last time, before he rolled off of her with a sigh. Resting on his side right next to her, he propped his head up on his hand and smiled at her eagerly. He pressed a short kiss to her jaw and nuzzled her cheek before he prompted, “You start.”

Chuckling lowly about how eager he sounded, Felicity closed her eyes. While her left hand moved to her nipples, carefully moving above the sensitive area without applying too much pressure that could hurt the due to the breastfeeding sore parts of her breasts, her right hand moved over her stomach and down to her folds. She moved her finger between the folds slowly, finding no wetness there yet, so she just kept stroking herself slowly without touching the most sensitive parts.

Felicity let her thoughts flow freely. Since Oliver didn’t touch her, she would have to go through her memories to remember how it felt when he did. She knew that nothing was going to turn her on more easily than the memories of how Oliver had touched her and kissed her and how he had made her come hard all these times they had had rough sex or made sweet love to each other.

After Emmy’s birth they had only waited a little more than five weeks before they had had sex again. They hadn’t wanted to celebrate their first wedding anniversary without it, so Felicity had drawn them a bath, and together they had rested in the hot water, snuggled up to each other. Her back had rested against his chest while his fingers had traveled up the inside of her thigh to her clit. He had circled it with the rough tips of his fingers, and Felicity had rocked her hips against them in response.

Replaying those memories in her mind, Felicity mimicked the movements. She drew little circles around her clit while rocking her hips against her fingers. She pretended it were Oliver’s fingers touching her and that it was his warm, hard body she was resting on instead of the mattress.

They had started talking about having another baby and Felicity had teased him that maybe she didn’t want to have another – an unthinkable thought now that they Tommy, Millie and William had joined the family. Oliver had stroked his fingers over her clit once more before he had started to move them between her folds. Felicity moaned quietly as she was getting a little more sensitive to her own touch.

She moved her hips against her fingers slowly, remembering how she had been denied to do the same that night in the bathtub. Oliver had put an arm around her and held her to him tightly, keeping her from moving against his fingers the way she had wanted and needed.

After awhile his fingers had traveled down even further to her entrance. She did the same now, sighting contently when she felt some wetness pooling at it. Oliver had kissed her neck, his teeth grazing her sensitive skin and his tongue soothing the pain the gentle bite had caused. His lips had traveled over her cheek to her ear. He had bit down on her lobe, tugging at it gently. At the thought Felicity moved her hand away from her breast and over the top of her chest to her neck and cheek, her fingertips tracing the path his lips had taken on her skin.

Felicity dipped the tip of her forefinger into her wet channel. Her toes curled slightly and when she remembered Oliver’s warm breath ghosting over the side of her neck when he had whispered into her ear, asking for her allowance to enter her with his fingers, a long moan escaped her lips.

Just like Oliver had done that night Felicity now thrust two fingers inside of her. Her back arched, allowing her to move them even deeper into her. His fingers had stilled, and so did hers now. She was so wet and warm and the thought of having Oliver’s fingers inside of her instead of her own made her bite down on her bottom lip and arch her back even more.

Though she still held her fingers unmoving inside of her, she felt her arousal increase. Slowly she started sliding her fingers out of her before thrusting them back in the same way Oliver had done that night. She had been embraced by warmth, the warmth of the water and the warmth radiating off Oliver’s skin. It had almost made her feel dizzy and it had added such a nice note to the pleasure.

Back that night she had fallen apart in his arms quickly. With Oliver’s fingers stroking her it was so much easier for her to come. She remembered how he had whispered words of encouragement into her ear with that deep, breathy voice that hadn’t missed to make her know how aroused he had been by her reactions to his caressing touch. It had easily sent her over the edge, and all it had taken had been one flick of his thumb against her clit for her to fall apart in his arms. Her entire body had trembled on top of his, and her inner walls had grabbed his fingers tightly, stopping them from pulling away and allowing her to ride out the waves of her pleasure instead.

Her thoughts strayed from her memories of that night more than five years ago. Instead she used all her experience with and all knowledge of Oliver and his actions to adjust the mental images in her mind to the way she was feeling.

She imagined Oliver lying right next to her with his head propped up on his hand. His face was hovering right over hers, his nose brushing against her cheek every once in a while. He was watching her face with dark eyes, taking in whatever reaction he got from her while he was moving his fingers in and out of her tight, wet channel lazily. Her fingers mimicked the way she imagined Oliver’s fingers to move, her hips rocking against them and after short of time it didn’t feel like her own fingers anymore. The fantasy intensified until it felt almost real to her.

Felicity was very sensitive by now. She felt her pleasure increasing, her orgasm approaching slowly. She moaned quietly when goosebumps spread on her skin. The way he watched her intensely while he was increasing her pleasure made her toes curl. Her heels dug more into the mattress, so she had more leverage to move against his fingers. Her hand wrapped around his wrist desperately. The orgasm was close, but the slow thrusts of Oliver’s fingers weren’t enough. She needed more.

She imagined opening her eyes and looking at Oliver pleadingly, asking him to give her more without saying a word. Of course instead of complying that cocky bastard would just cock his head and grin at her, moving his fingers even more slowly to increase her frustration. She knew exactly what he wanted and if she was just a little bit less desperate to come around his fingers, she might have taken the challenge and seen who of them gave in first. She was too close to her high to play games now.

“Oliver, please!”

Oliver’s fingers stilled inside of her for a moment. His eyes darkened, the intensity of his gaze increasing and-

A low groan pulled Felicity from her fantasy and brought her back to reality. Her eyes snapped open and found Oliver’s immediately. Just like in her fantasy he had his head propped up onto his hand and his eyes were focused on her face, taking in the reacting the thrusts of her own fingers elicited from her. Slowly Felicity lowered her gaze, taking in his abs shortly, before she watched his big hand wrapped around his cock, stroking it in slow movements that synchronized the thrust of her fingers. Felicity’s stomach tightened at that thought.

Licking her lips and taking in a deep breath, she quickly rolled onto her side, so she was facing Oliver. She rested her knee on his hip, so her legs were still spread enough for her fingers to continue moving in and out of herself easily. She and Oliver were lying so close to each other that their hands that were busy with pleasuring themselves brushed against each other’s.

Felicity looked at Oliver, finding his eyes already on her. They both smiled, and Felicity was sure that Oliver felt the intimacy of this moment as much as she did. Their bodies weren’t joined. He wasn’t inside of her. Actually, apart from the occasional brush of his hand against hers and the small point of contact where her knee rested on his hip they weren’t touching at all. The fact that they trusted each other with watching them masturbate and moving together without touching much was creating a greater intimacy than most sex probably could.

Her fingers began thrusting into her a little more quickly, and Oliver adapted the new rhythm. His hand moved up and down his length more quickly, his hips thrusting into his fingers whenever Felicity pushed her fingers inside of her.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered pleadingly.

He leaned forward immediately, capturing her lips with his. Circling her waist with his strong arm, Oliver pulled her closer to his chest. Felicity could feel the thick head of his cock brushing against her hip and if the moan it elicited form him was any indication, it was getting him closer to his relief.

Felicity felt the familiar prickling starting in the tip of her toes. She curled her fingers inside of her and pressed her thumb to her clit. Felicity bent her head back, breaking the kiss. As the pleasure was washing over her, his name fell from her lips in a desperate whisper. “Oliver.”

She rode out her pleasure against her fingers, humming at the content feeling that spread in her entire body. She hadn’t known how much she had missed sex until now. Felicity loved having sex with Oliver. It was one of the many ways they communicated with each other. Of course there were times that sex was just sex for them and it was simply about having fun and getting relief. This was none of those times. This was one of those times when it was more. This was them finding their way back into sexual intimacy after the last expansion of their family. This was them showing each other how much adoration and desire they felt for the other. This was a very physical way of telling the other that they were still in love and they were still crazy for each other.

When Felicity felt Oliver’s hand wrapping around her wrist, she opened her eyes. Oliver’s face was strained, telling her that he was holding onto the last thread of control here. He pulled her fingers from her center and lifted them to his lips, licking her juices off her skin, and if that didn’t set her nerve endings on fire once more! Felicity released a low whimper, her eyes locked with Oliver’s darkened ones.

Felicity couldn’t stop herself from reaching out her hand, pushing Oliver’s fingers away from his cock and taking hold of him instead. He thrust into her hand immediately, a low growl falling from his lips. Tightening her hold on his cock once more, she slowly moved her hand to the tip of his cock, her thumb stroking the head. The thrust of Oliver’s hips picked up pace quickly.

She was just about to move on to his balls when Oliver pushed her hand away, rolled himself over her and entered her in one hard thrust. He didn’t even make it to another thrust before he hid his face against the side of her neck and came with a muffled groaned. His cock was jerking inside of her, stimulating her sensitive inner walls. Felicity circled his waist with her legs and dug her heels into his butt to pull him closer. It allowed Oliver to move even deeper inside of her, and his cock pressed to just the right spot that made her back arch and another wave of pleasure rolling through her. Her nails dug into his back, her teeth biting down on his shoulder gently while she pressed herself closer to him, enjoying every last moment of her pleasure and every-

“What are you doing?”

In one quick movement that made Felicity release a short shriek Oliver slipped out of her, and into bed next to her, pulling the blanket over their naked bodies quickly. He had his back turned towards her, lying between her and the little intruder.

“What are you doing here?” Oliver asked breathlessly, pulling the blanket higher on his chest. “You are supposed to be napping and make sure that your little siblings are napping too.”

Felicity had to lift her hand from the pillow, so she could peak over his shoulder. Emmy was standing in the doorframe, looking at her parents with nosy eyes and a wrinkle between her eyebrows that gave away that she most likely didn’t understand what was going on here. Luckily, she should probably add.

“What were you doing?” Emmy repeated, cocking her head.

Felicity felt a deep blush forming on her cheeks and spreading down over her neck and chest. She bit down on her bottom lip in horror. Had Emmy just watched them climaxing? This had quickly turned from one of the best sexual experiences of her life to one of the worst. Their five-year-old had just caught them having sex! What the fracking hell had happened? How could Oliver not have noticed her?

While Oliver and Felicity were both struggling to come up with an answer, Emmy cocked her head and slowly came closer. She narrowed her eyes at her parents.

“Daddy, you’re sweaty,” she stated after a while, cocking her head. “Were you doing sports?”

“Well, we… we were… Mommy and I were-“

“Daddy had some backache,” Felicity interrupted Oliver’s ramble. She propped herself up on her forearm, so she could look at Emmy over Oliver’s shoulder. Her hand clutched the blanket to her chest, making sure it didn’t slide down and expose her breasts to the five-year-old. Emmy was nosy enough as it was. “Mommy suggested that daddy should do some sports to make it better.”

Emmy looked at her mother, frowning a little more. “You’re sweaty too.”

“That’s because mommy helped me with the sports,” Oliver quickly replied. “You know it’s more fun when we do this… together.”

Oliver struggled to get that last word over his lips, obviously showing that he hadn’t exactly thought his choice of words through before starting the sentence. Yet Felicity boxed his lower back for saying that, earning her a sharp intake of breath from Oliver. Sexual innuendos, especially involuntary ones, were her thing, and if she could pull herself together in a moment like this, then Oliver had to be able to do so too.

“And why aren’t you wearing clothes?” Emmy asked.

God, why did that girl had to be so nosy? As much as Felicity loved her daughter’s desire to explore the world around her, never afraid of asking and learning more, it really didn’t come handy now. Could she just ask for chocolate and leave them alone in their shame?

“We aren’t wearing any clothes because with all the sweating we thought it was better not to wear clothes,” Oliver replied. “You know, daddy would just have to wash them, so…”

“Can I go to my next swim group naked too?”

“No,” Oliver and Felicity quickly replied in chorus.

Felicity definitely trusted her daughter to do something like that, so she quickly added, “Only married people can do that.”

Oliver made a doubting sound, so Felicity boxed his lower back once more.

“Ow!” he said, shooting her a look. “Why are you doing that?”

“Pull yourself together,” she whispered. “She doesn’t need to know the details now.”

“No, of course not, but you want to make her believe that only married people can have this fun? We both know it’s not the truth and-“

“Oliver?” Felicity interrupted him with a sharp hiss. “She is five. She doesn’t need to know more than absolutely necessary. The right time to encourage her s-e-x-u-a-l self-confidence is when the time comes that she is old enough to understand and make those decisions. This time is not now. She actually shouldn’t know any of this yet, and she wouldn’t if it wasn’t for you and your lack of attention that-“

“Whoa! Why is this my fault now? You could have-“

When the doorbell rang, Emmy quickly turned around. “I’ll open!”

“You only open if you know the person in front of the door!” Oliver called after her. “Emmy?”

“Yes!”

As soon as the five-year-old had left, already on her way to the front door, Oliver pushed the blanket aside and quickly got out of bed. Felicity got up too and immediately hurried into the bathroom to wipe away the sweat and juices from her thighs. Oliver followed her, cleaning himself up and washing his hands before splashing some waters into his face. When he went back to the bedroom, he shot a look at Felicity.

“Why exactly is this my fault now?” Oliver repeated his question from before and put on some boxer briefs.

“You usually wake up from every quiet sound, but you didn’t hear Emmy come in?” asked back in a whisper, dropping the towel to the floor and hurrying back into the bedroom to put on some underwear. “How could you not hear it?”

“Well, I was distracted,” Oliver replied.

Felicity rolled her eyes, putting on her sweatpants and grabbing a sweater. She was about to say something more when she realized that there really wasn’t much to say at all. Oliver looked at her with a perked-up eyebrow, waiting for her to continue. Felicity only bit down on her bottom lip, though, a smile forming on her lips.

“She caught us having sex.”

Oliver zipped his hoodie, meeting her eyes. It took only a short moment before he started grinning too. Felicity could see him biting down on the inside of his cheek.

“We are terrible parents, aren’t we?” he asked.

Felicity chuckled. “Nah, I wouldn’t go that far. I guess we are just horny and a little too careless. What did we think? Having sex while the kids are basically in the other room?”

Oliver scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “Sorry?”

Slipping into her sweater, Felicity approached Oliver. She jumped up at him easily, circling his waist with her legs. When Oliver slid his hands under her butt, gently massaging her flesh, she smiled at him and within only the beat of a second Oliver smiled back at her. Felicity framed his face, gently moving her fingers through his short stubble.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered. “And I don’t ever want any aspect of our life change, but I did wish we could make Emmy unsee our…”

“-physical act of love?” Oliver offered.

Felicity groaned and pressed a firm kiss to his lips. “Come on, we should go downstairs and talk to her once more. Maybe that way we can prevent her from needing therapy.”

Oliver grumbled lowly and pecked her lips one more time before he let her back down on the floor. He laced his fingers through hers and together they headed towards the stairs. When they reached the foot of the stairs, Felicity heard the voices from the kitchen.

“Thank you so much, sweetheart.”

“Sure, Uncle John,” Emmy replied and Felicity could hear the pride in her daughter’s word. “Do you want something to eat too?”

“No, thank you very much. Where are your parents by the way?”

“Already here,” Oliver replied before Emmy got the chance. He let go of Felicity’s hand, not before squeezing it once more, lifted Emmy into his arms and kissed her cheek before he turned to his friend. “Hey. I didn’t expect to you here today.”

John huffed a laugh and squeezed Felicity’s hand on his shoulder when she leaned down to kiss his cheek. “Lyla took Sara to visit her parents.”

“And you were bored and thought you’d come and pay us a visit?” Felicity asked and sat down on the opposite side of the table.

“Kind of,” John replied. When Felicity perked up an eyebrow, he added, “I might have also come here to steal your husband from you for the night.”

“So desperate about Lyla being gone?” Felicity asked, patting her friend’s hand. Oliver rolled his eyes at that, while John just chuckled. When neither of them answered to her little joke, she looked back at John. “What do you need him for?”

“Arrow work,” John replied.

“Arrow work!” Emmy exclaimed happily and wiggled out of her daddy’s arms until he put her down to the floor, so she could cross the short distance to John and climb onto his lap. “Can I come with you? Daddy says I am too young, but can’t you sneak me in?”

John chuckled, shaking his head. “No, maybe when you’re older you can-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted him, “not even then.”

“Uncle John, I want to come with you already,” Emmy continued, ignoring her father completely. She grabbed the fabric of his jacket at the shoulder and started shaking firmly.

“Ow, ow, ow,” John hissed.

“Everything alright?” Felicity asked worriedly while Oliver was lifting Emmy from John’s lap and back into his arms.

“Yes, it’s just a little backache,” John explained, waving it off, “but I think I could use a night off, and that is why I need to borrow your husband, so he can take over for the night.”

Felicity nodded slowly. Oliver hadn’t been in the Arrow Cave since Millie had been born. They had spent the last weeks in their little bubble, enjoying the first time with their newborn daughter. They had decided to go back together when they felt the time was right. So far they hadn’t seen the necessity, knowing very well that their friends had everything handled. Felicity also knew that Thea and Roy were very busy with the planning of their wedding at the beginning of the next year and Laurel was snowed in with work, though. So it seemed like the right time was now.

Before she got to state that out loud, though-

“You have backache?” Emmy asked.

John nodded. “Yeah, looks like your Uncle John is getting old.”

Emmy wiggled out of Oliver’s arms once more and climbed back onto John’s lap, being very careful of his aching back. She stroked a gentle hand over his shoulder.

“Daddy had some backache too, but mommy made sports with him and now he doesn’t have pain in his back anymore,” Emmy stated.

Felicity’s eyes widened in horror, her hand reaching out to grab Oliver’s elbow and get him to do something to stop this, but her hand didn’t reach far enough and she ended up hitting the empty air instead.

Meanwhile Emmy kept going on happily, “You should do that sport too, Uncle John. Daddy says it’s more fun for him when mommy does it too. Maybe you have to ask Aunt Lyla, but she’s not here. Hm… Maybe mommy can do the sport with you because mommy is married and you have to be married when you do that sport because you have to be naked because you sweat a lot when you do it and you don’t want to wash all your clothes and-“

“Emmy, I think it’s time for your sibling to get up from their nap,” Oliver interrupted Emmy’s excited ramble while Felicity just hid her face behind her hands, closing her eyes and biting down on her bottom lip firmly.

“Should I go and wake them?”

“You go upstairs and gently wake Tommy, and daddy follows you in a minute to get Millie, alright?”

Emmy nodded, quickly sliding off her uncle’s lap to run upstairs. She always let herself be distracted with her siblings. Luckily!

When silence settled, Felicity blinked through the gaps between her fingers. She saw Oliver still leaning against the kitchen counter, his hands pushed into the pockets of his sweatpants. His shoulders were hunched, his head ducked. Did she even see the slightest of a blush on her husband’s cheeks?

Slowly Felicity turned her eyes to John. Her friend was looking back and forth between Oliver and Felicity, pursing his lips and shaking his head. “Really, guys?”

Felicity smiled at him innocently before she cleared her throat and said, “So… you can borrow Oliver for the night. I don’t need him tonight. Uhm… I mean… I don’t mean I need him like that. I just mean-“

“She means she wants to have sex desperately, but she gets along without it for the night given to our spontaneous encounter before,” Oliver interrupted her with a smug grin that quickly faded from his lips when John perked up an eyebrow at him. Just like Felicity before, Oliver cleared his throat. “Yeah, I’ll help out in the lair tonight.”

“Hmm,” John murmured, shaking his head once more. “You two are just impossible.”


	192. Mommy-Day

**O:** You are mean to send me something like that! Now I am going to spend all day sitting home and imagining I could take the bathing suit off your body.

 **F:** Maybe I will still wear it when we are coming home, so you can take it off later when the kids are fast asleep. ;)

 **O:** Hubby approves!

 **F:** I thought so! Anyway, the day is going great. Best idea I had in a long time!

 **O:** Glad to hear that. Tell me when you’ll be back home and I’ll prepare dinner.

 **F:** I will. Love you!

 **O:** I love you too.

Felicity smiled at the display of her phone for only a moment longer, before she put her phone back into the beach bag. With a sigh she turned her head to look a Millie on the air mattress next to her. She was dressed into the leopard-print swimsuit and the cream-colored sunhat Thea had bought her last week. With the first warm days now at the end of May Thea had had the perfect timing to buy her youngest niece some outfits to enjoy the summer. Felicity reached out a hand for her two-month-old and Millie wrapped her little fingers around her mommy’s hand immediately.

“Don’t worry,” Felicity whispered, watching her daughter, who was still half asleep after her nap as it seemed. “Mommy is right here.”

She couldn’t believe that Millie really was eight weeks old by now. Time had been flying by more quickly than ever it seemed. One second she had held Baby Millie in her arms for the first time, sitting on the floor of the elevator of QI and being terribly exhausted from the messy birth Millie’s timing had put her through, and the next her youngest was already two months old. It really made Felicity question how time had gone by so quickly.

When she had come home from work yesterday to realize that Millie was indeed two months old already, she had decided to take today off and spend the day with the kids instead. She had only been working for four days now, but she had missed the kids terribly. She didn’t regret going back to work because she knew her work was important and it mattered and might even have the power to make some actual change, but that didn’t mean that she hadn’t missed her kids every second that she had been at work.

Right after breakfast Felicity had taken all four kids to the beach to spend the first really sunny day this year having some fun in the sand and water. While she and Millie were enjoying some lazy time to relax now, William had taken Emmy and Tommy a few feet away to build sandcastles. Stroking her thumb over the back of Millie’s tiny hand that was still wrapped around her forefinger, Felicity turned her head to find her three older kids playing nearby. By now they had quit building sandcastles. Instead Emmy and Tommy were trying to bury their older brother in the sand.

Smiling, Felicity watched them. If a few years ago someone would have told her that she would ever be this happy, Felicity doubted that she would have believed it. She had everything she had always wanted and even more. She had two jobs she loved – one at QI and one in the basement of Verdant – and she had great people in her life that she loved and that loved her, first and foremost her family.

“What do you think, Millie, should we go and join your siblings a little?” Felicity asked her youngest daughter, and Millie released an almost squealing sound in response, kicking her short, little legs. Felicity chuckled. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

That being said, Felicity rolled onto her side and lifted Millie into her arms. The little girl released another sound when Felicity adjusted her position in her arms, so her daughter was resting with her stomach down on her mother’s forearm. Millie loved being carried like that. During the short time in the evening when she sometimes got a little whiney without needing a diaper change or a meal, it always calmed her down easily.

“You know, Millie, you could do mommy a favor and smile for her,” Felicity said when she got up and started walking towards the older kids. She ducked her head to look at Millie, but the little girl refused to smile. “Not ready to smile yet, hm?”

Felicity and Oliver had done everything in their power to try and get their little girl to smile for the first time, but so far Millie hadn’t even tried yet. Hopefully, it wasn’t going to take long anymore! Emmy had smiled at only six weeks and with Tommy it had taken until he had been seven weeks, so the pattern demanded that Millie started smiling in the next days.

When Felicity was close to where Emmy and Tommy were still busy burying their half-brother in the sand, she asked, “What are you doing here?”

“We are burying William in the sand,” Emmy replied, scooping more sand on William’s foot, so his toes disappeared under it.

Tommy blinked at his mother. “You help us, Mama?”

“Don’t you think William is buried deep enough in the sand?” Felicity asked, cocking her head to take William in. The teenager was indeed covered with sand. Only his face peeped out from under the sandy blanket. She smiled compassionately at William. “Everything alright with you?”

“Sure,” he replied easily. “It’s fun.”

Felicity chuckled. She loved how great William got a long with his younger siblings. He played with Emmy and Tommy when he knew that Millie needed some rest, and he spent time with Millie when the youngest Queen could use some good cuddle from her oldest brother. He loved being around them which was probably why he spent even more time with this part of his family now that Millie was born. Felicity loved that.

“Emmy wanted to go swimming, but I wasn’t sure if that was a good idea,” William added after a short moment. “I don’t know…”

“Well, if you put on your floaties, you can go swimming,” Felicity told Emmy.

“I don’t need floaties, Mommy. I can swim,” the five-year-old was quick to reply.

“Yeah, and it’s okay if you go into the pool without floaties, but when you go into the water at the beach, you still have to wear them.”

“But why?” Emmy asked with a whine in her voice. “I don’t want to wear them.”

Felicity got down on her knees in front of Emmy. The five-year-old pushed her bottom lip forward and crossed her arms in front of her chest, pouting. Losing a hand from Millie’s leg, Felicity put her fingers under Emmy’s chin and made her older daughter look at her.

“I know that you don’t want to wear them,” Felicity told her, “but the water here is much more dangerous than the water in our pool. That is why you can’t just go into the water without someone watching you or without wearing your floaties. Mommy loves you very much which is why I would be very sad if something happened to you, so would you please put on the floaties? For mommy?”

Emmy didn’t hesitate. She flung her arms around her mother’s neck and kissed her lips before she gently kissed Millie’s forehead and replied, “Okay! I will wear them for you.”

“Thanks, Sweetie,” Felicity said with a smile when Emmy immediately ran off to where her mother had put her beach bag with the floaties. Meanwhile Felicity turned to Tommy. “Do you want to go swimming too?”

Tommy nodded. “Tommy needs floaties too.”

“Yes, Tommy needs floaties too,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head. Before she could say anything more, Tommy already hurried after his sister, calling out her name to make her wait. Meanwhile Felicity looked at William. “Are you getting out of there on your own or do you need help?”

“I’m fine,” William replied, easily getting into a sitting position. “I wasn’t buried that deep.”

Felicity chuckled. “Good to know. It was a great idea to let them to this. I think they had a lot of fun.”

William smiled proudly. Felicity knew how much it meant to him that she and Oliver trusted him one hundred percent with his siblings, and that they did. Felicity wished she had had a brother like that when she had been younger.

“Do you want to go into the water with Emmy and Tommy or do you want to stay a little outside with Millie?” Felicity asked.

“I’ll go a little into the water if you don’t mind,” William replied.

Felicity smiled. “No, of course not.”

Together the two of them went to the air mattresses where Emmy was helping Tommy into his floaties. Her own floaties were already on her arms. Felicity put Millie down into the warm sand and checked both, Tommy’s and Emmy’s floaties. She reminded them that they had to listen to William and stay close to him before she gave them their go. While Tommy took William’s hand and walked with him to the water already, Emmy stayed with Felicity for a moment longer.

“You come with us, Mommy?”

Felicity smiled. “Well, I can’t go deep into the water, but I come a little closer. Millie can bathe her feet in the water.”

“She will like that,” Emmy replied with a wide smile.

She waited until Felicity had scooped Millie back into her arms before she quickly ran after her brothers. Felicity followed them slowly, whispering words to Millie, who was lying in her mommy’s arms and yawning.

“You can’t be tired again already,” Felicity told her with a chuckle and kissed her baby’s forehead. “You have just been sleeping for a few hours.”

She sat down in the wet sand where the wavelet just reached them. When the next little wave of water approached them, Felicity held Millie in front of her, letting the baby’s feet dangle in the water. Immediately the corner of Millie’s lips twitched and she smiled.

“You’re smiling!” Felicity said happily, feeling her whole heart warm at the sight.

Millie had finally smiled, and it had been her she had smiled at for the first time, just like Tommy had. That made two to one for her, something she would have to rub Oliver’s nose in once she was back home. They loved teasing each other about stuff like that.

For now Felicity pulled Millie close to her and peppered her little face with kisses of gratitude. Millie’s first smile alone was good reason enough for her to know that taking the day off to spend it with the kids instead had been the right decision. The memory of Millie’s first smile would forever be part of her now. Smiling about that, Felicity pulled her baby girl back towards her, cradling her to her chest.

She then turned her gaze to where Emmy and William were still trying to convince Tommy to go into the water. The boy held both of his siblings’ hands. They tried tugging him into the water, but he stayed where he stood stubbornly. As soon as the water rose above his knees, Tommy released a displeasured sound. He quickly pulled his hands away from his siblings’ fingers and came running towards Felicity and Millie.

“Hey, Buddy,” Felicity greeted him with a chuckle when Tommy went down on his knees next to her and leaned his head against her shoulder. Immediately she wrapped her arm around his waist and pulled his small body closer. “Don’t you want to swim?”

“No,” Tommy replied with a chuckle and hid his face against his mother’s breast.

Felicity chuckled once more and kissed the crown of her son’s head. After his trouble of adapting to the new situation with a baby in the family, Tommy was fine again now. Since he had discovered his love for stars, he was a lot calmer and a lot more relaxed. He loved his little sister a lot, and he told her about the stars every day. It was a thought that warmed Felicity’s heart.

“Are you having a good day?” Felicity asked Tommy after a moment.

Tommy nodded and put his chin to the side of his mother’s breast, looking up at her with a sigh. Smiling at him softly, Felicity stroked her fingers over his face. Tommy had always been the cuddlier kid in the family. While Emmy loved exploring the world and sitting still really wasn’t something she loved, Tommy just loved being with his mommy and snuggling up to her. Felicity definitely didn’t complain about that. Tommy was a great cuddler.

“Mommy?” Tommy asked.

“Yes, Buddy?”

“Why you go work?”

Felicity sighed quietly. It wasn’t the first time that Tommy asked this. In the last days since she had gone back to work, he had asked her and Oliver about this several times. Emmy had done the same when Felicity had gone back to work a few months after Tommy’s work. For Emmy it had been the first time that her mom had been working, though. Up onto that point it had been Oliver who had been leading the company, while Felicity had stayed home with the kids.

“Mommy has to work, so we can buy food and toys and such things,” Felicity began, stroking her fingers through Tommy’s hair. “Besides, mommy works on something really important.”

“What?” Tommy asked with a frown.

Felicity smiled and kissed the little wrinkle between her son’s eyebrows before she answered, “Mommy works with some doctors from a hospital because she tries to invent something new that will help people.”

“Help people how?”

“There are some people that can’t walk and mommy is working on something that might help them to walk again,” Felicity explained the new project she was working on in the easiest way she could imagine. “Does that sound cool?”

Tommy nodded, only saying, “Yes.”

“So it’s okay that mommy goes to work?”

Again Tommy nodded and Felicity kissed the crown of his head in response, tightening her arm around him to keep him close. When he started to play with Millie’s right foot, the little girl smiled.

“See? She’s smiling at you,” Felicity said, cradling her son’s head to her chest.

“She’s sweet,” Tommy replied and kissed the sole of Millie’s little foot.

Felicity watched the two of them with a smile. Tommy was still slightly shy around Millie, and he would probably not ever be as excited about her as Emmy – truth be told Emmy set the bar quite high – but he was okay with Millie being a part of the family. Whenever it got too much for him, he went into his room, watched the star projection Felicity and Oliver had gotten him and just relaxed a little. Sometimes Oliver and Felicity joined him and spend some quality cuddle-time with their son. This past week it had already helped Tommy to relax a lot.

Felicity was pulled from her thoughts when Emmy came running towards her. She put her hands to her mother’s shoulders and started shaking her head, shaking out her wet hair like a dog after a walk in the rain. The drops of water hit Felicity’s face, and she squeezed her eyes shut with a chuckle.

“What are you doing?”

“I make you wet, Mommy!”

“I’ve noticed!” Felicity replied. “Hey, try to make Millie a little wet maybe.”

While William approached them slowly and sat down in the wet sand next to Tommy, Emmy moved closer to Millie. She wrung out her curly hair over her little sister’s face, and when the drops of water met the rosy skin of Millie’s cheek, the baby smiled widely.

“Mommy, she’s smiling!”

“Yes, she is smiling,” Felicity confirmed with a nod of her head. “She just started.”

“She’s sweet!” Tommy repeated his words of before.

“The sweetest of all babies!” Emmy responded and hid her face against Millie’s stomach.

Again Felicity chuckled and turned her eyes to William. “Run out of steam for swimming?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “Just a little break.”

“Yeah, just a little break, Mommy,” Emmy replied. “A little break to cuddle with Millie.”

“That sounds good,” Felicity replied and moved her hand over Emmy’s hair. “So do you four enjoy the day?”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly.

Tommy nodded his head with a smile before he hugged Felicity tightly, making her suppress a slight hiss of pain since her breasts were quite sore lately. She pressed a kiss to the crown of his head. Tommy had never been a child of many words, well, Emmy usually spoke for two people anyway.

“It was a really great idea, Felicity,” William agreed with a smile. “It would be cool if we could do this more often.”

Felicity nodded, matching his smile. “I certainly hope so.”


	193. A special gift

“The last lab experiments brought good result. I talked to the head of the laboratory. He sent his report to the FDA. If everything goes as planned, we can end the preclinical test phase and proceed to transplant the first chips into actual patients. I already talked to the team of neurosurgeons in charge of the clinical test phase to let them know that the chip will hopefully be released for transplantation soon. I also passed on the body plan of the final version and the protocols of the test transplantations we did in the preclinical phase to them, so they can figure out if the same procedure works for the surgeries or if they need to change something. Professor Fulton has participated in the last preclinical tests and he told me he will convoke a meeting to supervise the team of surgeries in the procedure.”

After the long monologue Felicity felt slightly out of breath. She licked her lips only shortly before she put on a smile and looked at the by now more than familiar face on the display of her tablet. The man with the handsome face leaned back in his leather chair and smiled back at her.

“I guess all that is left for me to do is lean back, drink a glass of scotch and celebrate our success?”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “Did you do anything else these last months?”

He chuckled. “If you think that way, maybe you should come here and celebrate with me. I take financial profit from your part of our cooperation. Maybe you should take… emotional profit from my part of it. I throw the best parties and even better afterparties.”

“Bruce, you do remember that I am married, right?”

Bruce Wayne, richy-rich billionaire and exceedingly handsome man, laughed in amusement. Felicity knew that he wasn’t used to rejection. Wherever he went he had a mob of attractive women following him and trying to seduce him to take them with him into the castle-like mansion he was calling his home. Getting into Bruce’s home and bed even for only one night seemed to be every woman’s dream or at least every woman’s except for Felicity’s.

“I have a great lawyer. You can be divorced within the next two weeks and you will keep your house, your company, your money and everything else you hold dear.”

Felicity cocked her head, asking. “What about my husband?”

“No, not him,” Bruce replied quickly before he licked his lips and leaned forward, bringing his face close to the camera. “I am sure I could give you everything he can give you and even more, though.”

“Oh really?”

When Bruce nodded, Felicity’s smile turned into a grin. Over the months she had worked with him, she had gotten used to his occasionally aggressive tries of flirting with her. She knew he didn’t mean it. She could get on a plane and fly to Gotham City for a night of sins right now – not that she would even in her wildest dreams ever consider doing something like that – and he still wouldn’t sleep with her. At the end of the day Bruce knew exactly where her heart was and how much she would regret betraying it for a night of fun. Besides, Felicity knew that he didn’t just saw a pretty face in her. He knew how intelligent she was and he took her serious for it. She knew that she only had to say one word about feeling uncomfortable or disrespected and he’d stop. Felicity didn’t feel like that though and that was why she allowed herself to have some fun with Bruce.

“What about this cutie pie?” Felicity asked and angled the tablet, so the camera focused on Baby Millie, who was nursing at her breast.

“And we are back to being strictly business partners because these are not the circumstances I want to see anyone’s boobs in and I don’t think I will ever be able to forget it. I might be blinded.”

Felicity chuckled and quickly angled the tablet back again, so the camera focused on her face. She didn’t want to scare Bruce to death. She was sure that the view of her breastfeeding her little baby girl had the power to bring that smug and strong man to his knees, though.

“So what do you say to the progression of the chip?” Felicity asked, directing the subject back to work. She pulled her legs a little closer to her body, pushing the pillow that was pushed up between her chest and legs to support her arm under Millie’s little body and bringing her daughter closer to her breast. “It sounds really promising, doesn’t it?”

“More than promising,” Bruce agreed and nodded his head. “I didn’t think we’d make it into the next stage so quickly.”

“I didn’t think so either,” Felicity admitted. “I am not going to complain, though.”

“Absolutely not,” Bruce agreed. “You should come here and celebrate our success with me.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “If we’re back to that, I will hang up.”

Bruce chuckled and shook his head. “I think our friendship is the best thing that grew out of this cooperation.”

“Better than the chip that will help wheelchair-bound people to walk again? Really?”

“Now you are making me feel like an ass.”

“That’s what friends do,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. She glanced at the time in the upper corner of the screen. “I gotta hang up now. Oliver should be back any minute. It’s his birthday which means that the rest of the day is going to be spent with my family and I will be unavailable for everyone who isn’t invited to the party.”

“My birthday is in a few months too. Maybe you want to-“

“I’ll hang up now,” Felicity interrupted him with a chuckle.

Her thumb was already moving towards the button to end the video call when Bruce stopped her, saying, “Felicity, you do know that I am just joking, right?”

“Trust me, Bruce,” Felicity replied with a smile. “If I were feeling sexually harassed by you, our companies wouldn’t cooperate anymore and I am pretty sure your butt would be bound to a hospital bed for a long, long time.”

“I don’t doubt that,” Bruce said honestly. “Tell your husband I said hi.”

“I will. Bye, Bruce.”

With a sigh she ended the video call, locked the screen and put her tablet on the cushions next to her. She used her free hand to stroke her fingertips of Millie’s rosy cheek and watched her daughter for a moment. The little girl had grown so much in her first weeks of life. It was almost sad because Felicity would love to slow time down and keep Millie thing young a little bit longer. She was such a little sunshine, barely every crying. Unlike her older siblings who had seemed to have way too much fun terrorizing their parents each and every day, Millie just spent most of her days in content silence.

When Millie let go of her mother’s breast, Felicity smiled at her. “That was a good meal, hm?”

Felicity crossed her legs on the cushions of the couch and lay Millie down in the pillow on her legs. She waited a moment before she closed her bra and pushed her shirt back into place. She put the clean dishtowel over her shoulder and lifted Millie against her chest, so her head rested on her shoulder. She gently tapped her fingers on her baby’s back, waiting for her to burp.

Just when she did, Felicity heard their front door being unlocked. She kissed Millie’s temple and whispered, “You have perfect timing, my dear. I am sure daddy would appreciate some really good cuddle time. You’re in for that?”

Only a moment later Oliver stepped into the living room, his shoulders slumped and dark shadows under his eyes. Without any word he approached her, kneeled down on the couch next to her and pecked her lips. He took Millie from her, rested her again his broad chest and lay down on the couch with his head on the pillow on Felicity’s lap. His hands lazily moved over Millie’s back, his eyes closing. He looked terribly exhausted. Felicity stroked her fingertips through his short hair and leaned down to kiss his forehead.

“I just need one minute and I am the perfect birthday boy.”

“Take your time,” Felicity said gently. “Emmy decided to go with Thea and pick up William from the station. I told them to go eat some ice cream before coming back and Tommy is upstairs having fun with his stars.”

Oliver sighed, losing one hand from Millie’s back to take Felicity’s fingers from his hair and kiss the palm of her hand. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have a reason to thank me,” she told him honestly.

They stayed like that for a long moment. They didn’t speak, just enjoying having the other so close. Millie fell asleep on her daddy’s chest, tired out from the long morning. Oliver’s face relaxed eventually. The crinkles disappeared from his face. When he opened his eyes, they were filled with pain.

A tight feeling formed around her heart, his pain becoming her pain. The ache in her chest grew more and more, almost stealing her breath. She forced the air into her lungs and gave Oliver a sad but at least partly comforting smile. He smiled back at her instantly, releasing a shaking breath.

“It’s been nine years since Tommy died,” he whispered. “Today next year he will have been dead for a decade. I’ve gotten used to living without him, but I still miss him sometimes. Does that make sense?”

“Of course it does,” Felicity replied.

“Thanks for being here,” he whispered.

“Always,” she whispered back.

She leaned down to capture his lips with hers, putting all her love and understanding for him into the kiss and telling him that it was okay to have a moment like this without using any word. When their lips parted she moved her nose against his before she pulled back. Oliver’s eyes stayed close, but there was a soft smile playing on his lips.

“Tell me something,” he asked with a sigh, his eyes still closed, “anything. Just talk please.”

“I called Bruce and told him about the newest development with the biochip transplant and he was delighted about it.”

Oliver opened an eye, blinking at her. “Did he propose an indecent offer again?”

Felicity chuckled. “He did. He even offered me to help me getting a quick divorce. I should tell you hi, though.”

Oliver snorted. “First he’s trying to steal my wife from me and then he tells me hi?”

“Well, one can try to steal someone’s wife and still be polite, right?”

“Bruce has never been really polite, especially not when he’s trying to get his way,” Oliver grumbled and blinked at her through an eye, “He’s never giving up his flirting behavior around you, is he?”

“Probably not,” Felicity agreed, shaking her head with a chuckle. “Doesn’t really matter though, does it?”

Now Oliver opened the second eye too, smiling at her warmly. “No, it doesn’t because I know you’d never take his offer no matter how tempting. You’re still here.”

“And I always will be,” Felicity whispered back and stroked her fingers through his hair for a moment longer before she leaned down and kissed him once more. Oliver tugged at a strand of her hair, keeping her close to him.

“I love you,” he whispered when their lips parted and kissed her once more. “And I am very proud of you for the transplant. You are really doing a great thing with the development of it.”

“I love you too,” Felicity whispered back, gently stroking her fingers over his stubble. “Happy birthday, hon.”

Oliver smiled. “Thanks.”

“You know I could give you your first present now,” Felicity suggested, leaning back again.

“My first present?” Oliver asked with the smirk. “Is my first present the birthday sex or not?”

“It’s not. There is just no time for birthday sex right now unless you want another one of our children catching us in the middle of the act.”

“Thanks but no thanks,” Oliver replied with a chuckle and reached out his hands. “Give me my present please.”

“First I will put Millie into her crib.”

Felicity got out from under Oliver’s head and took Millie from his chest. Cradling her daughter against her chest carefully, she carried her to the small crib at the other end of the room. Since Millie was still sleeping a lot, they had the additional bed downstairs and it would probably stay here for some time longer.

Just when she turned back around to Oliver, excited to give him her present, Tommy came running into the room.

“Hi, Daddy!” he exclaimed happily, climbed onto the couch and on Oliver’s lap, hugging him closely. “Happy Birthday!”

Oliver smiled and held Tommy close to him. “Thanks, Tommy.”

“You get a lot of presents today, Daddy.”

“I hope so,” Oliver replied with a wide smile and kissed his son’s cheek. “Do you want to help me unwrap them later?”

“Yes!” Tommy nodded eagerly. “I love unwrapping presents.”

“When you were a baby, you liked the wrapping paper more than you liked the presents.”

“No, I didn’t, Daddy!” Tommy said with a laugh and leaned his head against his daddy’s shoulder.

Felicity watched the two of them with a warm smile. Tommy had basically started to talk more than two syllables each day over night. She hadn’t even known how much her baby boy – yes, he wasn’t a baby anymore, but he’d always be a little baby boy for her – could speak already until he had suddenly started talking a mile a minute. It seemed to depend on his form on the day, though, because he didn’t talk that much each and every day.

She approached them slowly and sat down on the backrest on the couch behind Oliver, gently massaging his shoulders. He leaned his head against her thigh, shooting her a short glance before looking back at Tommy, who was struggling with the packaging of the chocolate bar in his hands.

“Hey, what you got there?” Oliver asked him.

“Chocolate,” Tommy replied. “Aunt Thea gave it to me.”

“Did you say thank you?”

Tommy nodded. “I did.”

“Good boy,” Oliver replied and kissed his son’s cheek once more. “That’s a lot of chocolate. Do you want me to give you a piece of it to eat now?”

Tommy nodded eagerly, holding out the chocolate bar for his daddy. Oliver took it from him, opened the package and pulled out the chocolate in it a little, so he could break a piece of the chocolate for Tommy to eat. When he held it out for their little boy though, Felicity didn’t miss the tears in his eyes. If Oliver’s frown and confused gaze was any indication, he didn’t miss it either.

“What’s wrong?” Oliver asked.

Immediately the boy started wailing. Big tears were streaming down his cheeks. “You broke it! Now it’s broken!”

“No, it’s not broken. You can still eat it. It’s just-“

“No!” Tommy interrupted Oliver’s calming voice and crossed his arms in front of his little chest. “It’s broken now.”

“No, Tommy, look.”

“No!”

“Okay,” Felicity said calming.

She got up from the back of the couch and lifted Tommy into her arms. The boy circled her neck with his arms strongly and hid his face against her shoulder, still crying. Felicity had trouble to not burst out into laughter. Of course she didn’t want Tommy to cry, but sometimes that boy made life difficult for himself. She took the piece of chocolate and the rest of the chocolate bar from Oliver and started carrying her son towards the kitchen, Oliver following them. She sat Tommy down on the kitchen counter, gently wiping the tears from his cheeks with her hands.

“Should mommy work her magic and fix the chocolate for you?” Tommy sniffled, but he nodded his head, making Felicity smile and move her fingers over his dark hair. “Okay, then mommy will fix it, but first we need to know where daddy keeps the cookie cutters.”

“Far away where you can’t reach them,” Oliver mumbled and turned around to one of the cupboards. He pulled the cookie cutters from the topmost shelf and put the box next to Tommy on the kitchen counter. “And how are those going to help you to fix the chocolate?”

“You’ll see,” Felicity told him with a wink and turned to Tommy. “Pick the cookie cutter you like most.”

Tommy chose one that looked like a chipmunk and handed it over to his mother. Under the gazes of both of her men Felicity put the chocolate into a pot and started warming it. While the delicious sweets melted, the two pieces becoming one again, she greased the cookie cutter and put it on a piece of kitchenfoil. She gave the melted chocolate into the cookie cutter and looked at Tommy, who watched the arm chocolate with a frown.

“And now?”

“Now we have to wait until the chocolate is cold again and then you will have a chipmunk-formed. Cool?”

“Yes!” Tommy said excitedly. “Thanks, Mommy!”

“Anything for you,” Felicity replied, kissed his cheek and put him back down on the floor. “Do you want to get the books about the stars granny brought you yesterday to show it to William when he’s here?”

Tommy nodded and quickly ran out of the kitchen. Felicity looked after him, shaking her head and chuckling slightly. When Oliver put his arms around her waist from behind, she leaned back against him with a sigh.

“That was a good idea,” Oliver said and kissed the side of her neck. “Thanks for saving me from our son’s anger.”

“You’re welcome,” Felicity replied.

She moved her hands over his forearms for a moment before she turned her head to look at him. Oliver leaned in and gently brushed his lips against hers.

“I think you wanted to give me my present before Tommy interrupted.”

“Right,” Felicity said.

She shortly pecked his lips before she took his hand and pulled him back into the living room. Pushing Oliver into the cushions of the couch, she quickly hurried to the cabinet and pulled the gift out from it. She sat down, straddling Oliver’s lips and handed him the present, smiling widely. Framing his face with her hands, she kissed him gently.

“Happy birthday, Oliver,” she said once more.

Oliver smiled in return. “Thank you.”

Felicity slid a little back on his thighs to give Oliver room to unwrap the present. Her heart was beating wildly and her front teeth buried in his bottom lip while she was waiting nervously to see what was wrapped up in the red paper. When she thought about what to give to him for his birthday other than the traditional birthday sex, it had taken a lot of time until she had come up with anything that was really special because that was what she had wanted to give to him, something really special.

When the last piece of wrapping paper was pulled off and Oliver put it next to him on the couch, she held her breath and waited for him to say something. Oliver stayed silent, though, just watching the framed photo he had just unwrapped.

Felicity was holding a naked Millie to her own naked chest. Her eyes were focused on something outside of the camera focus, making her seem deep in thought. Her hair was slightly tousled and she wasn’t wearing any make-up. The photo was a black-and-white print because somehow she had felt it was more attractive. She had also experimented with which side she wanted to have photographed because of the scar on her shoulder. She had decided against showing the scar. She couldn’t say why.

Oliver continued to be silent. The longer his silence lasted, the more nervous Felicity got. Eventually her nervousness increased so much that she couldn’t stay silent any longer.

“Okay now would be the moment to say something,” she told him, “preferably before I die from nervousness because-“

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed her, putting a hand to her hip and squeezing it gently. “I am admiring my wife’s beauty.”

Felicity was about to chuckle and tell him to maybe look at her and admire her in person. Oliver lifted his hand to the photo, stroking his fingertips over the image of her face and down the back and that made every word get caught in her throat. She could almost feel the touch as if he was really touching her. Goosebumps spread down her spine as she watched him and took in the intense expression on his face. He lifted the photo to his lips and kissed it before he turned his eyes away and to her with a breathtaking smile.

“This is beautiful, Felicity,” he told her. “Thank you so much.”

“I’ve hoped you’d like it.”

She leaned down and gently pecked his lips. When she was about to slide off his lap and into the cushions next to him, Oliver stopped her, though. Cocking her head, Felicity perked up her eyebrows.

“Do you know why I love you?” Oliver asked her.

“Of course because I am perfect,” Felicity replied teasingly and chuckled. “Really, what’s not to love about me?”

Oliver cocked his head, frowning slightly. “Maybe your loud voice?”

“No, that’s turning you on.”

“Or the fact that you can get very mean when you’re hungry?”

“I could have sworn you would have planned to list all the reasons why you love me and not all the reasons why you don’t,” Felicity mumbled with a grin and perked up an eyebrow.

Oliver chuckled. He put the framed photo on the couch next to him and put his hands to her hips, pulling her closer against him until her chest melted against his. His lips pressed to the underside of her jaw, his stubble scratching her tender skin in the most delicious way.

“If I start naming all the reasons why I love you,” Oliver said, leaning back into the backrest of the couch, “we will still sit here tomorrow. I wouldn’t really mind, but we will have guests soon and I am sure they will mind. They are already complaining when they catch us making out or having sex or anything like that. If we just sit here, staring at each other madly in love they won’t like it either.”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “Yes, they would mind. I think they know too well that if we stare lovingly into each other’s eyes, we are most likely end up having sex and that is why they have problems with that.”

“Anyway, I will limit it to what is probably the most important one,” Oliver told her, “and that is that after years of being together, after all the ups and downs, after everything we have experienced together, you’re still the one. I’d still marry you without even one single moment of hesitation because there was not one second that I could picture my life with anyone else by my side. You are a wonderful person – beautiful, intelligent, kind – and an amazing wife and mother, so having you here is basically the best birthday gift. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me over the last years.”

Felicity smiled, putting her hand to his cheek. Sighing, Oliver leaned his face into her touch and she stroked her thumb over his cheekbone with a smile.

“You’ve become really good with words, you know?”

Oliver chuckled. “I am trying.”

Slowly Felicity leaned down and kissed him. It was a slow and gentle kiss. She put all the love she had for this man into the kiss. When their lips parted, their foreheads stayed in touch.

“Once again thank you for the photo,” he said. “I can’t tell you how much I love it. I will put it on my nightstand, so it’s the first and the last thing I see each day. You and babies or you and our kids… I don’t think it will ever not make my heart melt.”

Felicity pulled back a little more, frowning at him. “Shouldn’t I be the first and last thing you want to look at each and every day, though?”

“Not when you’re not naked,” Oliver replied and Felicity playfully boxed his shoulder. It only made him chuckle, though. “Oh, I have one question, though.”

“Shoot.”

“Who took the photo?”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “You want to send the photographer a thank-you card for his fabulous work?”

Oliver straightened up and brushed his lips against the lobe of her ear. “No, I want to kill him because I am the only one who gets to see you naked.”

Felicity chuckled. “And that’s exactly why I want tell you his name.”

She pecked his lips, patting his shoulders, and got up. Oliver sank deeper into the cushions with a dramatic whine. “And here I was hoping you’d tell me that it was actually a female photographer. Everything is ruined now, the whole day is ruined.”

Felicity stopped halfway to the kitchen to turn around to him. She put her hands to her hips and cocked her head. “I hope you know that our son’s dramatic outburst about the chocolate before is definitely something that he adapted from you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick info: 
> 
> 1\. The scene with the chocolate?  
> Actually happened with the child I babysit every once in awhile and yes, he is my RealLifeTommyInspiration.  
> 2\. Wonderful edit:  
> All my thanks to @victoriapolicity for making this wonderful edit that was the perfect inspiration for this special gift.  
> 3\. The next two chapters:  
> The next chapter is Felicity’s birthday. It turned out a little shorter than I intended because I didn’t have any specific idea for it.  
> The chapter after that is going to be something a little bit different, at least towards the end. It will include nine photos but rather at the end.  
> 4\. Day of posting:  
> When Arrow returns, I will change the day of posting this story probably to Thursday.  
> 5\. Next milestone:  
> We are getting closer to chapter 200 since this is already chapter 193 - WHAAAAT?!


	194. Unusual clients

“Felicity?”

Felicity looked up from the papers she was reading to see her assistant Emily standing in the door to her office, smiling at her warmly.

“Yes?”

“Your last clients are here.”

Without any hesitation, Felicity put the papers into the topmost drawer of her desk and folded her arms on the edge of the tabletop. She puckered her lips and frowned, cocking her head.

“Oh… I remember seeing an appointment when I checked for my schedule earlier today,” she said slowly. “It’s a long appointment, isn’t it?”

Emily nodded, the smile on her lips telling Felicity that she knew exactly what her boss was doing. “I think it’s a very long appointment because it is so very important. When the clients called, they repeated several times that it was very important that you take a lot of time for them. It will probably take the rest of your day.”

“That’s a pity,” Felicity said with a dramatic sigh. “I was supposed to spend the rest of the day with my family.”

“Of course you were. It’s your birthday after all,” Emily agreed, nodding her head. “They made clear that they really need your full attention for the rest of the day.”

“In that case of course I will give them my full attention,” Felicity replied with faked seriousness. “Do you remember the names of the clients? I know you noted them with the appointment, but I don’t remember right now.”

“Oh, let me check,” Emily replied and started working on her tablet for a moment.

Felicity ignored the giggling sounds that came from outside of her office though they made her smile. She had known that it was a good idea to have this little talk with Emily before her clients would come in.

“Here I got them,” Emily said after a few minutes. “Your appointment is with Princess Destiny, Prince Consort Nemo, Baron Crush, Lady Dory and Merlyn.”

“Just Merlyn?”

Emily smiled. “Just Merlyn, no title. I asked about that twice on the phone, but Princess Destiny told me that it was just Merlyn.”

“Hm,” Felicity made and frowned, trying to prolong this game just a little longer. “I don’t remember the names from before. Did I ever meet these clients before?”

Emily hesitated for a moment, puckering her lips. “I am not sure.”

“You’re not sure?”

“Yes, they were very mysterious when I talked to them on the phone,” she explained. “I don’t think you ever had a business appointment with them, though.”

“Well, if that doesn’t sound interesting…” Felicity said. “Maybe you ask my clients in and-“

She didn’t get to say the last word because before she could, Emmy was already running into the office. She was holding Tommy’s fingers in her right hand and a dozen of balloons in her left. The balloons got caught in the doorframe as she was unable to pull all of them through so easily. She had to stop to tug at the strings that attached the balloons to her wrist to make them get through the door and into the office one by one.

As soon as she had done so, she turned around on her heels and continued running to Felicity, exclaiming happily, “Happy birthday, Mommy!”

Without any hesitation Emmy came running around the desk and flung her arms around her mother’s neck. Felicity chuckled and hugged her daughter close for a moment. She kissed her cheek before she pulled back enough to look at her.

“Thank you so much, Sweetie.”

While William and Oliver, who was carrying a sleeping Millie in the baby sling in front of his chest, were stepping into the office, Tommy crawled onto his mother’s lap and kissed her lips.

“Happy birthday, Mommy,” he said quietly, resting his head on her shoulder.

“Hi, Buddy,” Felicity replied, rubbing her hand over his back. “Are you tired?”

“No,” he answered immediately. “Just want cuddle.”

“That’s great because mommy loves cuddles.”

“I know,” Tommy replied with a yawn, making her chuckle.

Tommy adjusted his position on her lap, snuggling closer to her and moving his head against the side of her neck. He was probably going to fall asleep within the next minutes.

“I guess someone regrets he refused to lay back down when he woke up at six-thirty this morning,” Oliver said with a look at Tommy.

“You woke up so early today?” Felicity asked Tommy with a dramatic sigh.

“Yes,” he giggled in response, making Felicity chuckle.

When William stepped in front of her the next moment, she straightened up as much as Tommy’s weight on top of her allowed her to. William put an arm around her shoulders and hugged her shortly.

“Happy birthday, Felicity.”

“Thank you, William,” she replied and smiled at him, “and it’s nice you are here by the way. I didn’t know you were going to come here today.”

“One of my teachers is sick, so the last class was canceled and I decided to take the afternoon to spend with you guys. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, absolutely. The family is only complete if you are here too and we are always happy when you’re here,” Felicity told him honestly and William smiled.

“Mommy, I think Tommy has fallen asleep,” Emmy said with a giggle.

Felicity turned her head, seeing that Tommy’s eyes were indeed close. If she listened carefully, she could actually hear him snoring softly against her skin. Smiling, Felicity kissed his hand that was clenched around the neckline of her dress and continued rubbing her hand over his back slowly.

“Mommy, do you-“

“Hey, hey, hey, first mommy will get the most important congratulations.”

“Right,” Felicity said and looked at Oliver, smiling teasingly, “Millie didn’t congratulate me yet.”

“Hey, I am the most important congratulator,” Oliver replied and pinched her side playfully.

“You think so?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

Oliver put his hands to the armrests of Felicity’s chair and leaned forward until their faces were on one level. He nuzzled her nose with his for a moment before he brushed his lips against hers in a feather-light kiss that barely lasted a second before his lips were already sliding over her cheek to the lobe of her ear.

“You know only nice birthday girls get the birthday sex, right?”

His voice was low, barely louder than a breath, so the kids wouldn’t hear him. It didn’t miss the huskiness she loved so much nonetheless. Felicity pursed her lips firmly and sucked in a breath, pressing her thighs together. Birthdays were definitely in her Top Something of favorite occasions for special sex. When Oliver pulled back a little, Felicity’s eyes locked on Oliver’s. He licked his lips, making Felicity suck in a deep breath.

“Do I get a real birthday kiss?” she asked since she hadn’t gotten one yet.

Usually Oliver always woke her up with birthday kisses, but he had been out on the streets long last night and she had told him not to wake up for her, especially since she had been forced to get up very early for a video conference that had been set for six a.m.. Oliver had tried to fight her on it, but his loud snoring this morning had revealed how tired he really had been.

Oliver smiled and leaned forward, capturing her lips in a gentle kiss that made her sigh against his lips. She loosened a hand from Tommy’s back to move her fingers over his shoulder before stroking them down his chest and brushing her fingertips against Millie’s soft cheek.

Before they got the chance to deepen the kiss, Emmy already complained, “Daddy, we don’t have time for that now! You can kiss mommy later!”

They pulled apart with a chuckle and Felicity turned to Emmy, asking, “Later? You mean when mommy comes home after work?”

“No, later when we are out of here, Mommy!” Emmy replied. “We have a surprise for you.”

“A surprise?” Felicity asked with a dramatic gasp. “For me?”

“Yes!” Emmy said happily. “Because it’s your birthday!”

“But I need to work,” Felicity replied. “I have clients that want to talk to me. They have an appointment. There is a Princess Destiny and…”

“That’s me!” Emmy exclaimed loudly.

Tommy’s snoring faltered for a moment before it started once more. When Emmy was about to continue, Oliver put a hand on her shoulder and immediately she looked up at him.

“Not that loud,” Oliver told her with quiet voice. “Tommy and Millie are sleeping.”

Emmy nodded and stepped closer to Felicity, explaining in a whisper, “We are your appointment, Mommy, so you don’t have to work on your birthday. I am Princess Destiny. Tommy is Prince Co-“

She turned her head and looked at Oliver with questioning eyes. Stroking his hand over Millie’s head and wiping some spit from her chin, he said, “Prince Consort-“

“Nemo,” Emmy added, looking back at Felicity. “William is Baron Crush. Millie is Lady Dory and daddy is just Merlyn.”

“Just Merlyn, huh?” Felicity asked, shooting Oliver a short glance and he rolled his eyes.

“It’s from the movies with Nemo, Mommy,” Emmy continued to explain.

“Oh, really,” Felicity said. “I didn’t know that until you remembered me.”

Emmy nodded proudly. “And because we are all Queens we used other titles, so you wouldn’t realize.”

“Wow!” Felicity smiled. “You totally took me by surprise. Did you plan all of that?”

“William helped a lot,” Emmy replied.

When Felicity turned to her stepson, he pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants and hunched his shoulders. Felicity smiled at him. With a wink she said, “I know you and Emmy are just up to no good when we leave you alone.”

“We are up to good,” Emmy hurried to say. “You have a free day now.”

“That is true,” Felicity replied.

She smiled at her loved ones, grateful that they were here. She had planned on taking the whole day off originally, but she had been unable to delay that video conference and two more short appointments had been added to her schedule for the morning. When she had seen the appointment of Princess Destiny and her friends, she had of course known who was behind that. She hadn’t said a word about it, though. She loved that they wanted to surprise her like this.

“And what are we doing with the rest of the day now?”

“Oh, Princess Destiny and Baron Crush have some great ideas about what to do,” Oliver told her, shooting Emmy a meaningful look.

Emmy nodded her head eagerly. “We planned the whole day, but it’s all a surprise. You need to come with us, though, Mommy.”

Felicity smiled. “Alright… and do I get my own codename?”

Emmy laughed. “We don’t need them anymore, Mommy! It was just for the appointment.”

“Ah, that makes sense,” Felicity replied, nodding. “So… we are leaving now?”

Emmy nodded. “Yes, yes, yes!”

Not waiting for her mother to even get up, she already ran ahead towards the elevator. William quickly followed her, while Felicity slowly got up from her chair, adjusting Tommy’s position in her arms, so she could carry her.

“This was a really nice idea,” Felicity told him.

Oliver lifted his hands. “It was all on the kids. They planned out everything. I was just looped in a week ago to help with some details, make us some food to enjoy the day and pay the money for whatever they wanted.”

“They planned everything on their own?”

Oliver nodded. “Well, I think William did most of it. At least I can tell that I didn’t. They wanted to make this day special for you.”

Felicity smiled. “I guess we will end the day with a lot of ice cream to properly thank them then.”

Matching her smile, Oliver stepped close to her and kissed the tip of her nose. “And once they drift into a sugar coma, we are going to celebrate the adult-version of your birthday.”

Felicity chuckled. “Nice way to put it.”

“And absolutely true,” Oliver added, leaning in and kissing her. “The kids wanted to make the day special for you, so I let them do that and decided to make your night just as special.”

 

When she fell into their bed five hours later Felicity decided that this had indeed been a special day. After Oliver and the kids had picked her up at Queen Industries, they had led her to their beach house, the very same beach house that Moira and Robert Queen had built years ago and where Oliver had proposed to Felicity for a second time. Everything had been decorated with balloons and there had been a lot of muffins and wonderful sweets to get them through the day. They had spent the rest of their day there, enjoying the sun while playing at the beach and swimming in the water. It had been a perfect day.

She smiled when Oliver stepped into the room with only his boxers on and crawled onto the mattress, so he was hovering over her. Felicity moved her fingertips lazily up and down his back while Oliver was just taking her in with gentle eyes.

“Did you enjoy your birthday?”

“It was perfect,” she replied with a tired sigh.

“You mean it was perfect except for the fact that there is still a gift missing, right?”

Felicity chuckled. “Don’t worry. I haven’t forgotten about the birthday sex.”

“Well, how could you? I was half-naked all day to remind you of it.”

“I noticed,” Felicity replied. “It was one of the things that made this day so amazing. Yet it was also nice to just have all the kids there and spend the day together. It was really William, who had that idea?”

“I think Emmy helped as much as she could, but most of it came from William, yes,” Oliver replied and cocked his head. “Why are you so surprised?”

“I don’t know.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, lowering her gaze to where Oliver’s hips rested against hers. Her fingertips continued their path up and down his back, moving over the scarred skin lazily. When she looked back at Oliver, intending to change the subject, she found his eyes already on her, the expression in it telling her that he was not going to let it go this easily.

“I love William,” Felicity whispered, “and I know we are getting along well, but… We had a rocky start with everything that happened before I got to know him. Then we were both kind of unsure how to act around each other. We found our common ground and we are really getting along well now… I mean he talked to me about Samantha’s new boyfriend before he talked to you about it, so I guess that is good for me. I just… I think I just didn’t know how much he actually liked me before today and I think that has been the greatest gift I got today.”

Oliver leaned down and captured her lips gently before he pulled back a little to smile at her. “Happy birthday, Felicity.”


	195. Battle of the godmothers

She came with a long moan, her fingernails scratching down Oliver’s back. He growled in response while his thrusts were growing quicker and harder at the same time. Felicity could feel his desperation to finally come after he had given her three amazing orgasms. Each of his movements screamed that he was chasing his release, so Felicity spread her legs a little wider, making him go even deeper. It only took him two more thrusts before his hips stuttered and finally stilled, his cock filling her with his seed deep inside of her. 

Felicity put three fingers to his cheek, turning his head, so she could capture his lips with hers and swallow his sounds of pleasure. Both of their hearts were beating in unison, pounding wildly against their ribs. Felicity was out of breath, her lungs burning with the need for more air, but she couldn’t let go of his lips just yet. She wanted to keep kissing him for just a little longer, forever if possible.

When the need for air grew too much for him to handle, Oliver loosened his lips from hers. He peppered kisses down over the side of her neck to the top of her breasts where his head eventually came to a rest. He snuggled his cheeks against her chest, his stubble scratching her soft skin in the most delicious way. Felicity hummed, her fingers stroking through his short hair and massaging his scalp, while Oliver’s arms pushed under her body around her waist, embracing her small frame and holding her close.

“This was great,” Oliver whispered against her sweat-covered skin and turned his head to press a kiss to the valley between her breasts where Felicity was sure, he could feel her heartbeat against his lips.

“Yes, it was,” she replied with a tired sigh. “Let’s nap a little.”

As soon as the last syllable had fallen from her lips, Oliver’s fingers started tickling her sides. Laughing, she kicked her legs and wiggled under him to try getting away from him. She regretted it immediately when the movement caused him to slip out from between her still sensitive folds. She moaned and her back arched automatically.

“You still want to nap?” Oliver asked, resting his chin on her breast, so he could look up at her, “Because my plan was actually to give you at least one more orgasm before we head under the shower where I will probably give you another one before we… maybe hop in the pool… naked of course.”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head. “There is no way we are going to have sex in the pool before the sun has gone down.”

“The kids will be back before the sun has gone done,” Oliver replied with a pout.

“Well, in that case you, my dear, will have to find some other place outside of our bedroom or the shower where you’d like us to have sex,” Felicity suggested, scratching her fingernails over his scalp and making him growl. “I am sure you have some other ideas where we could finish our sex marathon.”

“Hey, who said we were going to finish it already?” Oliver asked. “I have so many more ideas what I want to do with you before the kids are back. It was such a great of yours to give the kids away, so we can spend all day having sex.”

Oliver snuggled his cheek back to the top of her breast, but Felicity clenched her hand to a fist in his hair. Pulling at the short strands, she turned his head back, so he was looking at her. She decided to ignore the mocking-pained expression on his face. Oliver took bullets and stitched the wound himself without making a sound, but if she hit him with a pillow or playfully boxed his shoulder or pulled at his hair like she did now, he acted all hurt. Oliver just loved to be babied by her or the kids.

“I gave the kids away because Thea, Lyla and Laurel insisted on spending a delayed Godparent’s Day with their godchildren after Millie was christened the actual Godparent Day. You were the one to decide that we were going to spend the day having sex.”

Oliver frowned. “You said we will spend the day having fun. We are having fun, right?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “We could have done something else than sex.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. We could have gone shopping.”

“To have sex in the changing room?” When Felicity rolled her eyes once more, Oliver asked, “Besides, if we are celebrating a delayed Godparent Day, why’s Sara not here?”

“Well, Sara is coming here next weekend because Lyla would probably like to have a day just with John as much as you wanted one just with me,” Felicity replied and when Oliver perked up an eyebrow, she added, “to have some fun with her husband.”

Oliver cringed. “Ugh.”

Felicity chuckled, stroking her hands over his back. “What? You think we’re the only married couple with an amazing sex life? I have to disappoint you, hon. Lyla and John have a lot of sex too.”

“Why would you know that?”

“We are women. We like to talk,” Felicity replied.

“Oh, and what are you telling them?” Oliver asked nosily, a smug grin on his lips.

Felicity grinned back, scratching the scarred skin on his shoulder blade before she replied, “That you are still quite good for someone your age.”

“Someone my age?” Oliver asked, gasping for breath. “Say that again.”

“Someone your age,” Felicity replied with a grin.

“Oh, I will show you someone my age,” Oliver replied with a growl.

His hands started tickling her sides while his teeth were grazing her collarbone. Felicity laughed, kicking her legs and trying to get away from him.

“Okay, I’ll take it back! I’ll take it back!” she exclaimed eventually. Though Oliver stopped tickling her, she repeated breathlessly, “I’ll take it back.”

“You better do,” Oliver said before he snuggled his face back against the top of her breast.

They lay in silence for a long time. Oliver’s breath ghosted over Felicity’s chest, leaving goosebumps. Felicity’s toes meanwhile stroked up and down the back of Oliver’s calves lazily. She smiled at him contently. As much as she loved having sex with Oliver, she liked quiet moments like these when they didn’t have to say a word even more at times.

Felicity was almost asleep when her phone buzzed. Oliver grumbled, his chest vibrating against hers in a delicious way that made her hum. 

“What happened to the rule that we switch our phones out during sex marathons?”

“We don’t have a rule like that.”

“Now we do because I just set it up.”

“You are insane if you think I am switching my phone off while our kids are not here,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. She kissed the crown of his head before she turned as much as his heavy weight on top of her allowed her to and snatched her phone from her nightstand. “By the way, when Emmy was a baby, you were against giving her away for even an hour and even then you annoyed whoever was taking care of her with a text every few minutes. You were one of those terribly annoying parents nobody wants to babysit for.”

“We had a lot of people who wanted to babysit her,” Oliver replied, “so I can’t have been that bad, right?”

Felicity only mumbled something to herself that she hoped Oliver couldn’t understand because truth be told that he had been worse than any words could describe. She kept that for herself, though, knowing that Oliver would argue with her on this.

Looking at her phone, she smiled. “Thea sent a photo to our group chat, so you should have received it too.”

“No, I didn’t,” Oliver replied, “because my phone is switched off like it is the rule during sex marathons.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, saying, “Well, in that case you won’t see this utterly sweet photo of our daughter and your sister.”

Oliver stayed unmoving for a moment before he pulled one arm away from under her body to rest his elbow next to her face and prop his head up onto his hand. He looked at Felicity, but she only puckered her lips, cocking her head. Oliver chuckled in response.

“Come on, we both know you want to show the photo to me.”

Felicity was going to disagree with him, but she couldn’t bring herself to do so. She realized he was actually right. The best thing about experiencing sweet moments with their children or receiving cute photos of them like she had done from Thea now was sharing them with Oliver. When both of their excitement mixed and increased each other’s, it was the best feeling in the world.

That was why she turned the display of her phone to show the photo and the short text Thea had sent to Oliver.

 **TQ:** Emmy & I love this delayed Godmother Day. Finally a day to be completely crazy! 

Oliver smiled. “Can you believe she is turning six next year?”

“They grow up so fast,” Felicity agreed, pushing her bottom lip forward. It was like yesterday she had told him that she was pregnant with their first baby and suddenly they had three kids and William had found his way into the family, so they had actually four kids and… everything was just so crazy about this.

“I think Thea loves that Emmy is so much older now because now she can finally do all the fun stuff she always imagined doing with her. I think the first time she told me she wanted to do a beauty day had been when Emmy was half a year old.”

“Oh, she did do a beauty day with her back then,” Felicity told him. “It was cut short, though. Emmy hated the face mask and started crying, so Thea had to clean her up and-“

When her phone buzzed once more, Felicity stopped and looked at her phone once more. 

“Again something from Thea?”

“Nope, this time it’s from Laurel,” Felicity replied and opened the message. 

**LL:** We are celebrating this day rather calmly. You know, Baby Millie still needs her rest. As the perfect godmother I am making sure she gets as much of it as she needs. We just napped together the last few hours.

“On a scale from one to ten how sweet is our baby girl when she just woke up from sleep?” Felicity asked, holding the phone out for Oliver to see the photo.

He smiled. “At solid ten at least.”

Felicity turned the phone back, looking at the picture once more. Millie was three months old now and again it felt like time had just flown by. Why couldn’t her babies just stay babies? 

“Looks like the two have got everything handled,” Oliver said after a moment and ducked his head, so he could brush his lips against her jaw, “which means that we can go back to having a lot of fun.”

“You are insatiable.”

“Always when it comes to you,” Oliver replied. “I mean… can you blame me?”

His lips were already moving down the side of her neck, making Felicity hum. She was about to just give in and let him seduce her into another round of sex when her phone buzzed once more. Oliver growled, pulling back a little.

“Who’s disturbing us now?”

Felicity chuckled at his grumpiness and checked her phone for the message. “Thea again.”

 **TQ:** Don’t use Millie as an excuse just because you’re too old to make this day real fun for Millie. Besides, if these pictures proved anything than it’s that Emmy  & I win the contest for the cuter pic.

“What?” Oliver asked when Felicity only perked up an eyebrow. She held the phone out for him, showing him Thea’s message and Oliver frowned. “Hmm...”

“Hmm?” Felicity mimicked him, cocking her head. “That’s all you want to say about that? I love that Thea and Laurel are so invested, but this sounds like-“

 **LL:** Hey, if we speak about cute pics, don’t forget that Millie and I rocked photos from the first day on.

“How about you text back that the only reason any photos are rocking here is because we make the sweetest babies in the world?” Oliver suggested and kissed Felicity’s shoulder.

She shot him a short look that made Oliver only smile innocently. Felicity puckered her lips for a moment before she asked, “That is what you want to say while our friends are fighting?”

“Sure,” Oliver replied with a grin. “I am on the side of our children in this fight. Come on, type it. You know I am right.”

“Type it yourself if you want to say it,” Felicity told him.

“You know I can’t. No phones during the sex marathon.”

Felicity rolled her eyes once more while Oliver was moving up the bed. He sat down on the mattress next to her, putting an arm around her shoulders and leaning his head against hers, so he could watch what was happening on her phone.

 **TQ:** If you want to go there, what about this photo of Emmy and me sharing some ice cream?

“Now I am considering getting into the game too because you know if someone rocks pictures with our children, it’s me,” Oliver said, looking at the photo of his sister and his oldest daughter with a frown. When Felicity turned her head to look at him with a perked up eyebrow, Oliver quickly cleared his throat. “Of course I would lose if you’d enter into this contest too.”

“Saved by the last second,” Felicity murmured. Smiling, Oliver captured her lips with his in a quick but gentle kiss. They smiled at each other for a short moment before Felicity lowered her gaze back to her phone, biting down on her bottom lip. “Do you think we should say something about this because there really is no reason for them to make a contest of who is the better godmother or whatever they are doing here… They are both great godmothers.”

Oliver kissed her shoulder and smiled against her skin. “I think it’s funny.”

“It’s not funny when they are taking this fight into the lair.”

“I am sure they won’t.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “And what exactly makes you think that?”

“The fact that I am going to kick them out of the lair if they do so,” Oliver simply replied.

Felicity chuckled, about to respond, when her phone buzzed with the next message. 

**TQ:** Anyway, Emmy and I will start baking now. We are having a lot of fun with this day.

“Sounds like they are putting an end to their dispute,” Oliver said, stroking his fingertips from her shoulder down her back, “so I guess it’s time for us to go back to our fun, don’t you think?”

Felicity put her head back to look at Oliver. “And what did you have in mind?”

“Hm…” he made. Puckering his lips, Oliver moved his fingertips over her waist and to her front. The rough skin of his fingers stroked from her belly button and over her rib cage to her breast. He avoided her nipple, knowing quite well that it was probably sore from the breastfeeding, but touching the sensitive skin around gently. He ducked his head, nipping at her earlobe, before he leaned his lips against the shell of her ear and whispered, “Do you know where I am going with this?”

Closing her eyes and enjoying the sensations, Felicity hummed. “I got a good idea I think.”

“Do I need to be clearer about where I am going with this?”

Felicity smiled, licking her lips. “Oh, I wouldn’t mind if you-“

When the phone in her fingers buzzed again, Felicity looked back at her phone. Oliver’s lips fell from the spot right under her ear that always made her toes curl when he caressed it. He grumbled in response. “I am going to kill them if they continue interrupting us.”

 **LL:** It’s not like Millie and I aren’t having fun! We are having a lot of fun here too!

“Okay, they didn’t put their dispute to an end obviously,” Felicity said. 

She chewed her on her bottom lip a nervously though she couldn’t say why exactly this was making her nervous. She should be used to something like this because it was the same kind of playfully mocking fight she and Oliver had about who the kids loved more occasionally. They did know that the kids loved both of them. They just liked to pretend that they loved one of them more, so they could fight about it, but it was never serious. It was just their way of having some fun.

“Just let them tear each other apart about it,” Oliver suggested, his lips moving against her neck as he was speaking. “We-“

Again Felicity’s phone buzzed. With a dramatic whine Oliver let his head fall against her shoulder. Felicity chuckled and patted his knee over the blanket, looking at her phone.

 **TQ:** But we make it look better!

**TQ:** Okay, I admit this photo is a little older, but it’s still true.

Before Felicity could say anything, her phone buzzed once more immediately. 

**LL:** Hey, Millie and I know exactly how to dress up!

Felicity smiled. She had taken this photo of Laurel and Millie during the party after the christening a few weeks ago. She loved that picture. She actually had added it to the little collection of family photos on the wall at the stairs. 

**TQ:** I win nonetheless. I am fulfilling Emmy’s greatest dream here.

At the sight of the photo Felicity’s eyes widened. She pulled at Oliver’s hair, getting his head to move away from where it rested against her shoulder, kissing the side of her neck.

“Oliver,” she said urgently, still staring at the display.

“Uhm…” Oliver made once he saw what had her so shocked. “Did she…?”

“-buy our daughter a dog?” Felicity asked. “Please say no because we can’t have a dog.”

“There is no way we are going to have a dog,” Oliver replied, snatching the phone out of her fingers and starting to type. 

**FS:** Thea!!! Have you lost your mind?!

 **LL:** This is so unfair! How am I going to beat a dog?

 **TQ:** Not at all - that’s the fun!

 **TQ:** By the way Oliver will like the dog, Felicity. He will convince you. ;)

 **FS:** This is Oliver!!!

 **TQ:** Okay, in that case Felicity will like the dog and convince you…

 **FS:** She is not because she is sitting in bed with me – nakedly I should add!

 **LL:** Ugh!

 **TQ:** Too much information!

 **FS:** The dog can’t stay, Thea!

 **TQ:** But Emmy likes him so much…

 **FS:** NO!

 **TQ:** Hey, if you want to break her heart and tell her she can’t keep the dog, that’s your decision…

 **FS:** You will take care of this! 

**LL:** Now I am almost feeling sorry for Emmy…

 **FS:** What the hell were you thinking, Thea?! 

**FS:** Getting Emmy a dog without asking our permission?!

 **FS:** You should have known that it will end in tears!

“You know, it’s really annoying when people press sent after every sentence when they still have more to say,” Felicity mumbled when she saw Oliver’s texts, but he only shot her a short glance, his eyes angry.

 **TQ:** Okay, everybody relax! It’s just the neighbor’s dog. He is staying here for the day.

Felicity released a breath of relief. She wouldn’t want her daughter to be heartbroken about having a dog for a day but having to give it back. Fact was just that there was no room for a dog in their life. Two jobs and four children was already a lot to handle. Adding a dog to the mix would just be insane. Maybe one day when the kids were older…

“I am going to kill her when I next see her for the shock she put us through,” Felicity said.

“Trust me I will make sure she will get her punishment when we are sparring the next time,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “Can we go back to having fun now?”

Felicity grinned, turning her head to look at Oliver. “I could really use some good distraction after this shock.”

“I am really good at distracting you,” he replied, his grin widening.

“Oh, I know,” she replied. “You have full freedom to do as you please” – Her phone buzzed one more time – “right after I read this text.”

Oliver let his head fall back into the pillow, shaking his head and muttering words to himself that Felicity didn’t understand. It only made her chuckle. Oliver could really act as grumpily as their children sometimes… maybe even worse.

“Oh, it’s from Lyla.”

 **LD:** Between the baking and the dressing up I considered joining into this little contest, but… I am just too old for this.

 **LD:** If I wasn’t, Tommy and I would totally win, though.

Felicity laughed, holding the phone to her chest. If there was one thing for sure, it was probably that with their family and friends it was never going to get boring and she didn’t want it any other way.

When Oliver rolled first onto his side and then over Felicity, hovering over her with his body propped up onto his forearms, she stopped. She could still feel some more laughter in her throat, but she kept her lips pressed together firmly to keep the chuckle inside of her. If the expression in Oliver’s eyes was any indication, he wasn’t exactly sharing her amusement.

“Are you done laughing?”

“Maybe,” Felicity replied.

Oliver rolled his eyes and took the phone from her. He switched it off and carelessly threw it across the room. Felicity doubted that it was a coincident that it landed in the pool of clothes on the floor. Yet she cocked her head and looked at him with a perked up eyebrow.

“What?” Oliver asked.

“You know how I hate when you’re treating my phone or any other of my tech without the care it deserves, right?”

Oliver’s lips widened. “Do you want me to make it up to you?”

Felicity grinned back at him. “We both know I do, so go down there. Chop-chop.”

Oliver didn’t need to be told twice.


	196. Listen with your heart

“What are you doing?”

Felicity turned her face into the pillow with a sleepy smile, screwing her eyes shut. When Oliver’s lips continued their path down the side of her neck, Felicity pulled her shoulder to her ear, denying him access to continue tickling her skin. Oliver didn’t let that stop him, though. He ducked his head and kissed down her back. His warm breath ghosted over her shoulder, leaving goosebumps along her spine.

Felicity smiled, about to repeat her question, when Oliver answered. He murmured the answers against her back, whispering the words under her skin and into her soul. It was a declaration of love, soft words full of emotion. Felicity knew it from the husky yet gentle voice he spoke with and the way his fingertips danced against the naked skin of her hips. That was enough for her to know and it made up for the fact that she didn’t understand a single word of what he said.

“You’re speaking Russian,” Felicity mumbled after listening closely and sighed tiredly. “Don’t you think we had enough sex these last days?”

They had had a lot of sex these last days. Felicity couldn’t say why that was, but every once in a while she and Oliver were going crazy over each other. They were like a young couple that had just fallen in love and was enjoying the very first days of being together then. They would jump each other at every time and opportunity possible, reinforcing their love for each other. Right now was one of these times.

Anyway, usually speaking Russian was much rather one of Oliver’s last resorts to seduce her into having sex when they were having a dry spell. It was the magic thing he knew always worked, but he was making sure to not use it too often, so it didn’t love its magic. He just knew how easy Russian could turn her on for some reason she wasn’t really sure of herself. Felicity really couldn’t say why she always got so turned on when Oliver spoke Russian, but something about him speaking that language really made her toes curl and her stomach flutter.

When his lips reached her hips, he kissed the path back up her back and neck to her ear. His teeth grazed her lobe before he whispered his answer into the shell of her ear, again in Russian. And again Felicity didn’t need to understand the words he spoke to know what he said. For Oliver there was never enough sex – something she actually knew wasn’t completely true because when her hormones had driven her crazy about sex during the pregnancy, Oliver had made very clear that it had been too much sex for him. She liked bringing it up every once in a while to tease him, but not today.

“You’re insatiable.”

Oliver grinned, wordlessly telling her that she had gotten his answer right. His bent his arms that propped his body up to both sides of her chest and lowered his upper body onto hers. His abs pressed to the small of her back. His skin was arm against hers, the scarred tissues tickling her sensitive skin.

Felicity’s smile widened, but she turned her head to look at Oliver and said, “I don’t have time for whatever you have in mind.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow, asking a question.

“I have an early meeting, so I will take a quick shower and head right to work,” Felicity explained to him, knowing that he had asked something like that, “and before you ask, of course not before I had some coffee.”

Oliver chuckled shortly before he stroked his digit from her cheek over the side of her neck down between her breasts. He puckered his lips, watching the blush spreading on her skin where his finger had touched her. He asked another question, something allegedly innocent, but Felicity knew better than that.

She turned under Oliver’s body completely, so she was lying on her back, and stroked her fingertips up and down his back gently. With a smile on her lips Felicity replied, “You can join me in the shower if you promise to behave. I only have thirty minutes, though.”

Oliver lowered his lips to hers, kissing her gently. Felicity sighed into his mouth, stroking her fingers through his short hair. She knew this kiss was his promise to behave and not make her be late for her meeting. Sometimes she let him seduce her using the privileges of a CEO and make her be a little later, but only if it wasn’t that important. Oliver knew that and he respected that.

When they pulled apart, Oliver said something more. She couldn’t exactly follow with the details of it, but from the glint in his eyes and the way his words shot a jolt of pleasure right through her core Felicity could say that he was still keeping his sex-talk strong.

“You already convinced me of starting the day with some sex. You can stop with the Russian,” Felicity told him, cocking her head.

Oliver only chuckled. He got out of bed, scooped her up in his arms and gave her a fireman’s lift. Felicity laughed, putting her arms around his waist to hold onto him though she didn’t fear for even a second that he’d drop her. She knew she was safe with Oliver.

“I am just going to repeat that I already agreed to have sex. You can stop showing off all your attractive traits, you know?”

Oliver chuckled before he said something more and slapped her butt playfully, making Felicity giggle.

“Okay, whatever it is you are planning on doing here, I am sure I am going to agree to it.”

* * *

When Felicity stepped into the kitchen 45 minutes later, well showered and perfectly satisfied from the great sex, Oliver was standing at the kitchen counter, pouring coffee into her favorite mug. He was carrying Millie on his free arm, talking to her in soft Russian words, while the little girl was staring at her dad with wide, blue eyes.

“You’re still speaking Russian,” Felicity stated, frowning at him.

Oliver turned around to where she was standing in the frame of the door and putting on her shoes. He smiled at her softly. The coffee mug in his hand he approached her and handed it to her. His lips brushed against hers gently for a short moment before he pulled back, an amused smile playing on his lips.

“You’d tell me if you had a stroke and wouldn’t remember how to speak English, would you?” she asked him before taking a sip from her coffee.

Oliver grinned, saying something more, first to her and then to Millie. The little girl laughed full-heartedly in her daddy’s arms. Felicity was about to tell him that he was acting weird with all his speaking Russian even around Millie, when Oliver tickled the little baby’s tummy, calling Felicity’s attention to the shirt Millie was wearing.

“Daddy loves mommy, hm?” Felicity asked, reading the capitals on the shirt. She perked up an eyebrow. “Did you mess with a piece of my tech stuff and are trying to get into my good graces before telling me?”

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head. He didn’t say anything, though, so Felicity narrowed her eyes at him over the rim of her coffee mug.

“I am going to find out what you are doing here, Mister,” she told him. “You know I hate mysteries. They buck me.”

Oliver grinned at her, shooting a conspicuous look at his watch. She knew that he was asking her if she didn’t have to leave when he said something Russian yet again.

“Lucky you, you are right,” Felicity said, adding in a slightly singsong, “I am still going to find out what you are doing.”

She peppered a dozen kisses to Millie’s cheek before she put her coffee mug on the kitchen counter and turned around towards the door. When Oliver asked her something – she was very sure he complained about not being kissed goodbye too – she only turned her head to look back of her shoulder. “Sorry, but I don’t understand you, so no kiss for you.”

She was sure she heard Oliver grumble some Russian words in response. It only made her throw her head back and laugh.

* * *

Oliver’s weird behavior didn’t stop there and Felicity got only more suspicious. Either her husband had messed up with something and was about to beg her for forgiveness later or he was up to something. Either way she was almost sure that he wanted to get into her good graces for some reason.

She knew that Oliver loved spoiling her. He had once told her that it was his way of being a better boyfriend or husband than he had ever been. He felt like he had ruined all his former relationships. Admittedly, Felicity felt like lying and cheating like she knew he had done in his times before the island hadn’t been the best way to show that he cared, but not all the relationships he had had before her had ended because of him. At least two relationships had ended because of Helena Bertinelli.

Anyway, she knew that he felt better if he spoilt her and showed her how much he loved her and their life together on a daily basis, so she let him do it. Yet this felt like more than his usual attentive and caring behavior.

All day she had found messages – sweet, little words of adorations or declarations of love, sometimes as simple as the drawing of a red heart with a green arrow – he had placed in her office and in the other rooms of the QI-building. It had taken her the offer of two days off to get her assistant Emily to tell her that Oliver had personally placed them there after she had left last night. She had thought he had been in the Arrow Cave, but apparently he had come here instead.

She still didn’t know why he was doing it, but she was sure it wasn’t going to take much longer.

* * *

When she came home that night, it was almost midnight. It had been a long time since she had been home that late the last time. Since the biotransplant was in a critical phase of development, work had been crazy these last weeks, though.

She carelessly kicked her shoes away and strolled into the living room, knowing she’d find Oliver there. He never went to bed before she was home because he was easily getting nightmares if she wasn’t lying next to him in bed safely. She was indeed finding him on the couch, smiling at her softly and already holding out a hand for her.

“Hi,” she said in a quiet whisper, putting her hand into his and lying down on top of him on the couch. She snuggled her cheek to his chest, closing her eyes with a content sigh.

Immediately Oliver’s warm hands pulled the tie from her hair, loosening the blonde strands from the strict ponytail, and stroked over her hair gently. Felicity smiled and yawned sleepily.

When Oliver asked her something, she replied, “Just tired.”

She could feel Oliver’s lips widening to a soft smile at her words, probably happy and proud that she understood him though she didn’t speak Russian. Sighing lowly, Felicity put her chin to his chest and looked at him with a frown.

“Don’t you want to tell me why you have been talking Russian to me and why you left all these sweet messages in my office?” Felicity asked him.

Oliver shot a glance at her watch, not answering to her. Felicity was going to ask him again, when he lifted a hand. With each passing second he lowered one finger. The moment his thumb lowered and his hand clenched into a fist he leaned in and gently captured her lips with his. Felicity was slightly confused, still no idea what all of his has been about, but she just went with it. Kissing Oliver was always good.

“Happy belated birthday, Felicity,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted, resting his forehead against hers and stroking the knuckles of his fingers over the skin of her cheeks.

Felicity frowned though a smile was playing on her lips. “My birthday was more than a month ago and you were here celebrating it with me.”

“I know,” Oliver replied, stroking his thumb over her bottom lip, “but the kids wanted to surprise you that day, so I wanted them to have all your attention-“

“You ran around shirtless all day. I doubt you wanted them to really have all my attention.”

Oliver chuckled. “Okay, I wanted them to have most of your attention. I saved a little bit for myself. Anyway, I didn’t really get around giving you my present that day which is why I caught up on that today.”

Felicity smiled. “So that’s what that was all about?”

Oliver smiled, pecking her lips. “I know you love it when I speak Russian and it seems like Millie enjoys it too.”

“Yeah?” Felicity asked.

“Very much actually,” Oliver replied, his smile widening. “She always looked like she was about to start crying when I spoke English with her again.”

Felicity chuckled. “Like mother, like daughter.”

“Probably.” Oliver kissed her once more. “I was starting to wonder who she was going to take after. Looks like she is more like you.”

“Well, we still have years to figure out who she really is,” Felicity replied.

Oliver smiled at her, playing with some strands of her hair. Slowly his eyes narrowed down on her, though, and he cocked his head slightly when he asked, “How did you know what I was saying all day? I know you always get the sex-related things because I am speaking Russian to you often when we’re having sex, but you understood like everything I said today. Did you secretly learn Russian?”

Felicity smiled, shaking her head. “Nope.”

“Then how did you know?”

Slowly she moved a hand over his chest until her fingers came to rest right over his heart, feeling the steady beat against her fingertips.

“I don’t need to know what you say to understand you,” Felicity explained in a whisper. “I know you better than anyone else and I love you with all of my heart. Sometimes it feels like we aren’t even two people but one because we are so connected to each other. All I have to do is listening with my heart to understand you.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned in and kissed her gently. His tongue opened her lips to him and stroked against hers. Felicity sighed, giving back as much as she could. When their lips parted, Oliver brushed his lips against hers once more before he pulled back and looked at her with a frown.

“Was that from _Pocahontas_?”

Felicity chuckled, resting her cheek against his chest over his heart. “Maybe inspired by it.”

Oliver wrapped his arms around her shoulders tightly, kissing the crown of her head. “Feels almost like it’s my birthday now with what you said.”

“We’re married. I share everything with you and that includes my belated birthday.”

“Good to know,” Oliver whispered. “Do you want me to carry you to bed?”

Felicity sighed sleepily in response, snuggling up against Oliver even more. “I don’t know… I’m comfortable here.”

“Then let’s sleep here,” Oliver suggested.

“Okay.” Felicity sighed once more, closing her eyes. She was so tired, she’d probably fall asleep within seconds. Wrapped up in the warmth and the scent of Oliver’s body, she could always fall asleep easily. “You know what I just thought?”

“Tell me,” Oliver suggested, his voice as sleepy as hers, telling her he was tired too.

“Maybe I will learn Russian for your next birthday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am currently writing chapter 199 which is in the old style of the first Time for a story chapters with Oliver and/or Felicity telling their kid/kids a story about the time before they became parents. It’s actually the follow-up to a story that was told very early in the story and if you check the first chapter titles, you should be able to guess which one it is. ;)


	197. Made for loving you

As soon as Mr. Dennis turned away, Felicity released a breath of relief and reached out a hand for the tray with the glasses of orange juice next to her. Leaning her head against Oliver’s shoulder, she took a sip and closed her eyes for just a moment. After years of leading the company talking to some of the people on the board still made her so terribly nervous at times though she knew that she had no reason to. She was doing a great job being CEO if you considered that they had been in the black for quite some time and it didn’t look like that would change, actually with the first successful transplantation of the bio-transplant the company would hit a new high.

When Oliver started rubbing his warm hand over the small of her back, Felicity opened her eyes and angled her head back to look at him. He put both of his hands to her hips, pulling her from his side until she was standing in top of his, her chest pressing against his. Felicity smiled happily at the amazed expression in his eyes. She knew that she was the only person he would ever look at like that and it made her stomach flutter in the best way possible.

“What?” she asked and leaned almost her entire weight against him.

Oliver’s arms tightened around her lower back as he smiled at her for a moment longer. He ducked his head slowly and brushed his lips against hers teasingly. When Felicity chased his lips, trying to get him to really kiss her, Oliver kept out of her reach all the time, still teasing her. Felicity chuckled and went with it for a moment longer before she held his face between the palms of her hands to make him hold still and pressed her lips to his.

When she broke the kiss, still very aware of all the people around them, she licked her lips to enjoy the last of his taste on her lips. Pressing her chest closer to him, she angled her head back even more to look into Oliver’s face. There was still this look of amazement and love in his eyes, and again it took her breath away.

“Did I tell you how proud I am of you?” Oliver asked. He kissed the tip of her nose before he added, “Because I am really proud of you.”

Felicity smiled, her heart skipping a beat. She knew what she was doing at Queen Incorporated especially with the bio-transplant QI and Wayne Enterprise had worked out together mattered and actually made a change in the world. It was why this very party took place. A young man of only twenty-four years had made his first steps after being in a wheelchair for the last months after a tragic car accident. He still needed a lot of therapy to regain the strength in the muscle to keep upright for more than a few seconds, but the first step had been made to allow him to reclaim more mobility. She had been part of the reason that had become possible and it was still unbelievable.

Anyway, the fact that she knew that she was part of this unbelievably great progression didn’t mean that she didn’t like hearing Oliver acknowledging to it. She knew how much he loved and supported what she was doing with the company that his parents had helped shape. She knew how amazed he was by what she had achieved and yet she was still happy and even speechless at times whenever she actually heard him say it.

“You are giving people a new perspective. You make Queen Incorporated the beacon of hope that it failed to be for a long time,” Oliver told her. “You are doing a much better job at leading this company than my parents ever did or as I could have ever done.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered.

“Thank you redeeming the name of the company by making QI into what it is today,” Oliver told her. He kissed her forehead. “I love you all the more for it.”

Felicity smiled. “I know and I love you too, especially since I know that I couldn’t do any of this without you.”

“Yes, you could,” Oliver told her.

“Maybe,” Felicity admitted, “but it wouldn’t be as much fun and it probably wouldn’t be as gratifying.”

When Oliver ducked his head to lean closer to her this time, Felicity put her arms around his neck. She closed the last bit of distance between them, brushing her lips against his. They kissed gently, their lips moving in perfect synch. Felicity could feel Oliver’s heartbeat against her own chest and his uneven breathing ghosting over her face. One of the millions of reasons she loved Oliver so much definitely included that he was a great kisser. She could get lost in the taste of his lips and tongue so easily. Like-

“Well, well, if this isn’t Starling City’s favorite couple.”

At the sound of the familiar voice Felicity broke the kiss with Oliver. He tightened his arm around her waist immediately, keeping her from taking a step away and bringing some appropriate distance between them when she turned around to where the voice had coming from. Felicity smiled at the man that was approaching them slowly, an unreadable smile playing on his lips.

“Bruce,” she said, her own smile widened. She stepped out of Oliver’s arms for a moment to welcome her friend and partner with a kiss to his cheek. “I am so happy you could make it after all.”

“You look incredible, Felicity.”

“Thank you, Bruce.”

As soon as her lips pulled away from Bruce’s cheek, Oliver put his hand back to her hipbone and pulled Felicity back to his side. His hand stayed on her hip possessively, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on top of the fabric. One short look in his direction and Felicity knew that this wasn’t going to be an easy talk. The forced smile that was plastered to Oliver’s face gave away how uncomfortable he was with this meeting though his body didn’t tense as much as she would have expected.

“Oliver,” Bruce finally said, his eyes focusing on the man at Felicity’s side. He looked him up and down shortly before his gentle smile turned into a grin.

Felicity didn’t miss how Oliver clenched his jaws when Bruce held out a hand for him. He took in a deep breath before he shook the other man’s hand, probably using a lot more force than necessary. She looked from one man to the other, waiting for one of them to show the slightest sign that the handshake wasn’t as friendly as it should be, but neither of them even flinched.

“Bruce,” Oliver said eventually, pulling his hand back. “I thought you had some appointments that couldn’t be delayed and that you couldn’t make it.”

“Well, let’s just say that Batman got in my way,” Bruce replied. “It turned out the people I thought were my partners were actually working against me. The appointments were cut short and I could come here. I am glad I could make it though the reasons are definitely not good ones.”

Felicity pulled her lips into her mouth, shooting Oliver a short glance. She knew that he hadn’t been too happy when he had heard that her friend and business partner actually had his own secret identity that he used to fight crime in his city, especially since Batman was a lot bloodier than the Arrow was these days. Oliver had been particularly bothered by Bruce’s question if Felicity didn’t want to join him on his crusade. As a husband Oliver wasn’t as jealous as he used to be, but as the Arrow… Since Bruce seemed to challenge both sides of him – not that Bruce really had a sexual or even emotional interest in Felicity, but he liked to pretend he did for some meaningless flirting to happen between them – Oliver felt at unease.

“What a shame indeed,” Oliver responded, his smile still frozen in place.

“I am surprised to see you here, though,” Bruce stated. “Shouldn’t you be home watching the kids? I think Felicity mentioned that you have become the male version of a house maid. What’s the word for that?”

“I guess in my case it’s called being a father.”

Felicity quickly took some sips of her orange juice, cursing the fact that she was breastfeeding and couldn’t drink because being a little tipsy would definitely help right now. She looked from one man to the other. She knew that Oliver and Bruce had met before. Since both of them came from rich families, they had met from time to time over the years. Bruce’s parents had died very early, though, which had led the two of them on very different paths. It was weird how their lives had taken such different turns early in their lives, but had taken them closer again now. Bruce might be leading a multibillion dollar cooperation, while Oliver was a stay-at-home dad, but they were both trying to protect their cities by using secret identities. It didn’t seem to make the two of them like each other anymore, though.

“Do you want to see photos of our children?” Oliver asked, already reaching his hand into the pocket of his pants to pull out of his phone.

It seemed like he decided on the passive-aggressive way to handle this situation, Felicity realized. Showing photos of their happy family around was usually her way of dealing when one of Oliver’s ex-girlfriends came back into the picture. She wasn’t exactly surprised that he suggested this now, though. He had witnessed how well that tactic worked after all.

“Thanks, but I think we are not here to celebrate the achievements of your family, but the achievements of Felicity’s company and my company, aren’t we?”

“As far as I am informed Felicity did most of the work, didn’t she?” Oliver asked, cocking his head. “It doesn’t seem fair that you are trying to carry off the bays only because your company invested some money and staff into the project.”

Felicity smiled to herself. She would have bet that Oliver would have emphasized that it was both of their company which was true. The company just like everything else they owed was both of theirs. The fact that he decided to defend her role in the project instead meant a lot to her. It was the little things that meant the most to her, always had.

Bruce’s unimpressed smile widened. “Oh, I absolutely agree with that.”

“So you are not trying to adorn yourself with borrowed plumes?”

“I wouldn’t dare to,” Bruce replied.

Felicity took a short look around, trying to figure out how to end this conversation as quickly and as elegantly as possible. She was sure if Bruce and Oliver would continue talking in this tense and passive-aggressive tone, they might actually decide to go to the bathroom and check who of them had the longer-

“You know, Felicity never told me how the two of you two met,” Bruce stated after a moment, smiling at her honestly before directing his gaze back to Oliver. “Nothing against you but-“

“Bruce,” Felicity said warningly, shooting her friend a look to make him know that she knew exactly that his ‘but’ would take away of what he had said before.

As much as she didn’t want to get involved into this conversation between former friends or enemies or whatever he and Oliver were to each other, Felicity wouldn’t let Bruce offend Oliver. She didn’t want to pick a side, especially since she didn’t know exactly what was going on between these two and she mostly just wanted to roll with her eyes about them, but she knew that if she had to pick a side, it would always be Oliver’s. If they needed this passive aggression, fine, she wouldn’t get engaged into that, but she wouldn’t allow her friend to offend her husband, especially not in a way that would suggest that he didn’t deserve her or anything like that.

Bruce looked at her for a moment before he directed his gaze back towards Oliver. “So Richie-Rich-boy Oliver Queen and the smartest girl under the sun…” Bruce shrugged his shoulders, cocking his head slightly. “How did that happen?”

“I needed a computer expert and was told that she was the right person to go see,” Oliver said. His fingers curled into her hip with the slightest of possessiveness and he kissed her temple. “Turned out it wasn’t the only thing she was the right person for.”

“Oh, I did experience how great Felicity is in a lot of ways,” Bruce replied, looking he up and down, his eyes staying for the beat of a second longer where the dress hugged the curve of her hips and where the low neckline allowed to see the top of her breasts.

Now Felicity really rolled her eyes. As much as she didn’t want to get engaged into this, obviously the two men didn’t care. She knew that Oliver knew that there had never anything happened between her and Bruce. Doubts about their faithfulness to each other were no part of their marriage. She also knew that one word of her was enough to make him take it all back because as much as Bruce liked to pretend he was an arrogant sexist, he really wasn’t and he would never want her to feel like that. He did take her serious as a partner.

“Trust me, no matter how many ways you experienced it, I experienced it in some more.”

When Oliver’s hand sank a little lower on her hip, a small part of his hand resting against the curve of her ass actually, Felicity rolled her eyes once more. She should probably be proud that at the age of 33 she was still treated like… well what exactly was she treated like? A piece of meat? A reward? Neither of it sounded like something she wanted to be.

“It’s great you seem to have at least one quality Felicity could appreciate.”

“Speaking of qualities, I heard that crime rate in Gotham City still didn’t drop much,” Oliver replied, cocking his head. “I guess Batman doesn’t really help making the city a safer place. Starling City has the lowest crime rate since… ever probably.”

“I think it doesn’t exactly make sense to compare these two cities since the crimes committed there are very much different, aren’t they?”

“Oh, I don’t know if I would say that,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “Italian, Russian and Chinese mafia organizations fighting over territory, drug dealers, killers… How much difference could there be?”

“Okay, then let’s compare these guardian angels as the media like to call them. Given that the Arrow needs all this help around him, I guess Batman can still do a lot more. He might not be as efficient as the team around the Arrow yet, but he is alone on his mission, so I guess if we set their achievements in relation to the size of their teams, we’d see that Batman is a lot more effective. Besides, he probably has the lower rate of relapse, doesn’t he?”

“I am sure he also has the higher rate of killing innocents,” Oliver replied.

“I am too old for this kindergarten,” Felicity mumbled to herself. When Oliver looked at her in question, probably wondering what her mutter had supposed to say, she quickly put on a smile and emptied the rest of the orange juice.

“Besides, how threatening can Robin Hood be?”

“Probably more threatening than a guy in a cape and a bat mask,” Oliver replied. “I think I even read that a lot of women are into Robin Hood fantasies.” Felicity turned her head to look at him, perking up an eyebrow. “Not that I would be interested in that,” he added quickly and shot her another short glance.

“I’d say Catwoman would disagree with that.”

“Batman, Catwoman,… One could think you are building a zoo in Gotham.”

Bruce chuckled, his eyes not showing any sign of amusement. “Undressing a sexy woman in black leather, which guy wouldn’t approve to that?”

“For me it’s not about the black leather and much more about the woman I am undressing,” Olive replied and pulled Felicity a little bit closer to his side. “Besides, always black leather is probably quite tiring. I am happy to be able to say that I am allowed to undress Felicity from-“

“Okay, I am really not drunk enough for this,” Felicity interrupted, straightened up onto the tip of her toes to check where the next waiter was.

“You are not even drinking,” Oliver replied and though she wasn’t looking at him, she knew that he was frowning at her. “You are still breastfeeding.”

“Please no mental pictures of that again,” Bruce said, making a face. “I am all in for women to be allowed to breastfeed everywhere, really, but not Felicity. It destroys the image of my superhot business partner if I have to see that again. The only way I want to imagine her nipples are-”

“You do know that you are still talking about my wife, yes?”

“Yeah, I will quit breastfeeding for a few days. I am not making it through the evening without alcohol. You two have fun and when you are finished here, I will be somewhere in the room, ready to talk like adults.”

She patted Oliver’s chest with her hand, shot Bruce a short look and turned around on her heels, making her way through the crowd towards the bar. She was almost there when a hand wrapped around her wrist, another one taking the empty glass from her hand and putting it aside.

“Dance with me?” Oliver asked.

He didn’t give her a chance to reply. Instead of that he just pulled her onto the small dance floor. He put an arm around her waist, pulling her close against his chest and laced the fingers of his other hand through hers. Felicity rested her free fingers on his chest, right over his heart, while they started swinging in time with the slow music.

“I’m sorry,” Oliver said quietly and kissed her temple. “I didn’t mean to ruin this evening for you. I know how important this is and-“

“Hey, I am not mad,” Felicity replied, chuckling lowly and shaking her head. “It wasn’t like it was too serious or otherwise I would have found a way to make the two of you stop. I know you and Bruce are… well, what are you exactly?”

“Too different to be friends, too similar to be enemies and too… I don’t know… to be anything else but… I don’t know?”

Felicity chuckled. “Well, you two will have to adjust to each other because I am sure this is not the last time you will meet.”

“I am going to nice if he is,” Oliver promised.

“I am going to flay him alive if he isn’t.”

“And spank me if I’m not?” Oliver asked, grinning smugly and wiggling with his eyebrows lewdly.

Felicity huffed a breathy laugh. “I know that if I tell you I am going to spank you, you will go right over and punch him.”

“Yes, I will.”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head. “You are terrible.”

“And yet you love me.”

“And yet I love you,” Felicity agreed, smiling at him.

“And that is all I need,” Oliver replied and kissed her. When their lips parted, he smiled at her for a moment longer before he lowered his voice to a whisper and asked her, “But back to Bruce. Dressing up as a bat? Really?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized I am going back and forth between calling the company Queen Incorporated at some times and Queen Industries at others. :D
> 
> I am trying to go with Queen Incorporated from now on, but I can’t promise I will manage to all the time.


	198. Through the eyes of a child

When a low noise pulled Felicity from her already light sleep, she turned her face into the pillow. With a sleeping baby in the room next-door, she never really slept soundly. She was hyperaware that Millie could wake up and she would be forced to get out of bed and breastfeed her daughter. She took in a deep breath and listened into the darkness, waiting for the baby monitor to transmit Millie’s dissatisfied cries once more, but everything stayed silent.

Felicity rubbed her foot against where it rested on Oliver’s calf. At the beginning of August it was just too warm to sleep snuggled up to each other, yet there was always some way they touched each other even in their sleep. For the beat of a second she considered rolling over and resting her face against his shoulder, so she could breathe him in, but she knew the warmth that radiated of Oliver’s skin and decided against it. As much as she loved burying herself in the warmth of his embrace in the winter, she tried to keep some distance in summer.

“Mommy?”

At the sound of the whispered voice Felicity rolled from her stomach onto her side and turned her head to the door. It was opened, Emmy standing in the doorframe with her pink giraffe under her arm. She looked at her mother with almost shy eyes that were so unusual for the young girl that Felicity frowned in worry.

“What’s wrong, Sweetie? Did you have a nightmare?” she asked.

Emmy shook her head. “I can’t sleep.”

Felicity pulled the sheet she was using as a blanket away, scooped closer to Oliver to make more room and patted the mattress next to her. Emmy’s face brightened up with a wide smile. She closed the door behind her quietly and hurried through the room to crawl onto the mattress. With the window being open to let in some fresh air, it wasn’t too dark in the room for Emmy to no see where to go. Without hesitation she crawled onto the mattress and snuggle herself close to Felicity. Once the girl was comfortably settled against her chest, Felicity smiled, kissing the crown of her daughter’s head.

“Try sleep a little,” she whispered.

She knew that with the warmth of Oliver’s chest against her back and the warmth of Emmy’s body against her chest her chances for some more hours of at least light sleep had decreased even more. Pressing her nose against Emmy’s curly, blonde hair, Felicity smiled nonetheless. She couldn’t remember when Emmy had come into their bedroom to sleep here the last time. Since Tommy’s crib had been replaced with a bed a few weeks ago, he was coming here more often, though. Neither Felicity nor Oliver had it in them to ever send him away. Usually they waited until he was asleep before they put him back into his bed where he spent the rest of his night.

Felicity kissed Emmy’s forehead before she tightened her hold on her daughter and closed her eyes, intending to at least get a little rest if she didn’t get any sleep.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, Baby?”

“Tomorrow’s my first day in school.”

Felicity smiled. When had her baby girl grown up like this? It still felt like yesterday Felicity had taken her home with her from the hospital and now she would start kindergarten already. Time had just flown by so terribly fast.

“Are you excited?” Felicity asked and felt Emmy shrug her shoulders in response. Smiling, she stroked her hands over her daughter’s back and whispered, “I remember when I had my first day in kindergarten. I was so excited. School is so cool. You will learn a lot of things like how to write and how to read. In a little while you can read the bedtime story to Tommy and Millie and-“

“Mommy?” Emmy interrupted her.

Felicity ducked her head. Even in the dark she could see her oldest daughter looking up at her with eyes wide open. Felicity stroked her hand over Emmy’s hair gently. “What’s going on, Sweetie?”

Emmy played with the topmost button on the shirt Felicity wore, avoiding her mother’s eyes. Worried about her behavior, Felicity put her fingers under Emmeline’s chin and angled her head back to make her look at her.

“What if I am not that smart?”

Her voice was only a whisper, barely louder than a breath and almost unable to be heard over Oliver’s soft snoring. Felicity didn’t miss to hear the honest worry in her daughter’s voice, though. She pressed a lingering kiss to the girl’s forehead, tightening her arms around her.

“I know you and I know you very well,” Felicity whispered into Emmy’s ear. “You, Emmeline Harper Queen, are unbelievably smart. I know that.”

“But what if I am not?”

Felicity’s frown deepened. Not loosening her hold on Emmy’s small body, Felicity pulled back enough to look at her daughter once more. Just like she had said before she really knew her daughter and she really knew her well. Behavior like this wasn’t exactly likely for Emmy. She was usually rather self-confident though a lot of that was probably the normal light-heartedness of a child. She wondered what had caused the sudden insecurity in her daughter, trying to figure out what was going on with her. The day had been normal, though, nothing unusual happening that could have caused this.

“Is this because of your first day in kindergarten tomorrow?” Felicity asked.

Emmy nodded, snuggling her cheek to the top of Felicity’s breast. She tightened her arms around her daughter, holding her as close to his chest as she was able to.

“I want to be as smart as you are.”

“That’s a high aim,” Felicity mumbled.

Emmy giggled, putting her head back and looking at Felicity. “It’s because you are the smartest person on the earth, Mommy.”

“Maybe not the smartest…”

“Daddy always says you are,” Emmy replied, her voice back to the slightly insecure tone.

“Let’s just say I am in the Top Five, huh?”

Emmy smiled at her mother for a moment before she took in a deep breath and sighed. “So what if I’m not that smart?”

Felicity looked at her daughter, considering carefully what to say to her. Emmy was a lot like her, just as quirky and with a just that happy nature. Of course the two of them could be different when it came to insecurities, but Felicity doubted it. When Emmy had learned about William, she had pushed Oliver away because she had though he daddy was going to leave them. Felicity reacted the same way. If she felt like her heart was at risk, she distanced herself to make sure that she wasn’t hurt too badly.

So what would help her in a situation like this, Felicity wondered and thought back to her own childhood. She had been terribly insecure as a child, too, especially when she had been this young. Just like she and Emmy were so similar, she and her dad had been or at least she had believed that they had been at that time. She knew better now. Anyway, she still remembered her own fears of disappointing her father if she wasn’t as good in school as she felt she should have been as his daughter.

“If you are not as smart as me,” Felicity whispered, “then nothing will change. Daddy and I will love you just as much as we do now. We will always love you no matter what.”

“Really?”

Felicity ducked her head and kissed her daughter’s lips. “Yes, absolutely.”

Emmy looked into her mother’s eyes for a long moment, seeking for any sign that her mother wasn’t saying the full truth. Only when she didn’t find any, she moved up the bed a little and kissed her mother’s lips. Her hands rested against Felicity’s cheeks, her forehead leaning against her mother’s when she whispered, “I love you, Mommy.”

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied. “And now try to sleep a little, okay? We need to wake up early tomorrow morning.”

Emmy nodded and rested her head against her mother’s shoulder. Felicity kissed her daughter’s temple and adjusted Emmy’s position against her, so they were both comfortable. Resting her chin against the crown of her daughter’s head, Felicity closed her eyes. A yawn escaped her, revealing how tired she was.

“Mommy?”

Felicity huffed a quiet laugh. Emmy really was just like herself. Sleep sounded like a foreign word to her when she was on a train of thoughts. “Yes?”

“When I grow up, I want to be just like you.”

“You can be everything you want.”

“I want to be like you,” Emmy repeated.

“That,” Felicity replied with a wide smile and kissed Emmy’s forehead once more, “means a lot to me. Thank you, Sweetie.”

“Good night, Mommy.”

“Good night, Emmeline.”

Felicity closed her eyes once more, smiling to herself quietly. What greater compliment was there than your little girl wanting to grow up to be just like you? For her there definitely was none. Emmy was such a daddy’s girl that Felicity could have sworn that she wanted to be just like Oliver. She-

When Emmy started moving away from her, Felicity opened an eye. “What are you doing?”

“It’s too warm here. I go back to my bed,” Emmy replied in a whisper. She kissed her mommy’s lips once more before crawling out of bed. “Good night, Mommy.”

“Night, Emmy,” Felicity replied, suppressing a chuckle.

Once the door was closed behind the little girl, Felicity felt Oliver’s arm wrap around her waist and pull her back against his chest. He nuzzled the side of her neck before he kissed the juncture of her neck and shoulder.

“I was already wondering how long you would continue pretending being asleep,” Felicity said quietly, knowing quite well that Oliver had gotten up the moment Emmy had left her bed, probably hearing her footsteps on the hardwood floor when she had tiptoed down the hallways towards them. She might have light sleep, but surely Oliver’s was lighter even in its soundest state.

“She wanted you, so I figured I’d give you the mother-daughter-moment she needed,” Oliver replied. “What you said to her was really beautiful.”

“She does set the bar very high if she wants to be as smart as me,” Felicity said quietly.

“She needs to find a middle ground between the two of us,” Oliver suggested, “not as smart as you but not as dumb as me.”

“Hey, you are not dumb,” Felicity told him. “You are smart. You were just terribly lazy as a teenager and at the beginning of your twenties.”

Oliver chuckled. “That might be true. I guess that is not something we have to worry about with Emmy.”

“Probably not,” Felicity replied with a smile. “I am sure she will do great.”

“Yes, she will,” Oliver agreed and kissed her shoulder once more. “Night, Felicity.”

“Night.”

Oliver snuggled closer to her back before he sighed contently. His warm breath ghosted over her cleavage as he did so. His arms tightened around her waist and his head snuggled more into the crook of her neck.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Take your hands off me and get back to your side of the bed.”

“What? No, we are cuddlers.”

“Not when it’s this warm.” Felicity loosened his arm from her waist and pushed it away.

“You would have cuddled with Emmy.”

“If you are an insecure five-year-old in need of some motherly love, I cuddle with you all you want.”

Muttering something to himself that she didn’t understand and probably wasn’t even supposed to understand, Oliver moved back onto his side of the bed. Felicity chuckled. She turned onto her stomach and laced her fingers through Oliver’s on the pillow between them, knowing that they would both sleep better with at least a little bit of contact.

“Better?” she asked.

He smiled. “Much better.”

With their fingers linked like that they fell asleep soon after.

 

Felicity was just putting the last touch to her make-up when Emmy came running into the bathroom, looking her up and down. She could see her daughter smile brightly.

“You are wearing it,” she said with a mixture of several emotions, varying from pride over surprise to pure joy. “You are really wearing it.”

“Of course I do,” Felicity replied, smiling at her daughter in the mirror. “You asked me to wear it, so I do.”

“Thank you, Mommy.” Emmy stepped closer to Felicity in front of the mirror. She leaned her head against the side of her mother’s body and smiled at the picture they made in the mirror. “We look exactly the same.”

“We absolutely do,” Felicity replied. “Do you want to run upstairs and trick daddy with how similar we look?”

“Oh, yes!”

Full of excitement Emmy ran out of the bathroom and upstairs. Felicity’s eyes followed her daughter’s movements in the mirror before she focused back on herself and put on her lipstick. She looked at herself in the mirror, smiling at the thought that her oldest child was really starting school today. It still sounded… so weird.

Putting the lipstick into her purse, Felicity went downstairs. She could hear Oliver’s and Emmy’s happy voices from the living room, laughing about how Emmy had really fooled Oliver into believing that she was her mother. Felicity was sure that both of them knew Oliver hadn’t really been fooled by it, but usually everyone went with these jokes in their family. It was part of the fun they always had.

“See, Daddy, there’s mommy!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly when Felicity stepped into the living room. She came running towards Felicity, hugging her. “Don’t we look exactly the same, Daddy?”

“You really do look like the same person,” Oliver said with a chuckle, getting up from the floor with Millie in his arms. “It’s no surprise Millie and I thought you were your mother.”

Emmy giggled, pressing herself a little closer to Felicity and she moved her fingers through her daughter’s curly hair in response.

“I think it’s time to go,” Felicity said. She looked down at Emmy, smiling at her encouragingly. “You’re ready?”

Emmy nodded, her face revealing how nervous she still was. Felicity kissed her forehead and took her head on the way to the car. The little girl stayed quiet during the drive to the school. While Oliver, Felicity and Tommy were singing some children’s song from the CD, joined by Millie’s delighted laughter, she just looked out of the window, taking deep breaths. Felicity watched her daughter closely, smiling to herself. The first day in school was a big thing. Of course she was nervous.

When they arrived in front of the school, a dozen of young kids and their parents were already waiting in front of the building for the teacher to lead them to the class. The program for the day provided that the kids would say goodbye to their parents here. They would join them in the classroom later today, so the kids could show them what they had done during the day.

While Oliver helped Tommy out of his seat and lifted Millie into his arm after that, Felicity opened the door for Emmy and helped her out of the car. She took the backpack they had bought for their daughter and helped Emmy to put it on. When she took the first step towards the school building, Emmy gripped onto her hand tightly.

Felicity looked at her daughter and winked, but all Emmy managed to do was a nervous smile. She looked at the building ahead of her, taking everything in carefully. Ruler number one in a Smoak Girl’s way to deal with scaring situations – know everything about the situation, so you can have everything under control.

It wasn’t long before a young woman with long black hair and dark skin stepped out through the large doors with a welcoming smile. Immediately everyone fell silent, eyes taking the young woman in carefully.

“Good morning and welcome to your first day in school. I know you’re all very excited. I can tell that I am very excited, too, because believe it or not today is also my first day here in school,” the woman said. “I am Ms. Anderson and I will be your teacher and I hope we will spend a great first day here together. I have prepared a few things in our class room, so we can get to know each other and you can get to know each other and, yeah, I just hope we will have a lot of fun today. I’d suggest you say goodbye to your parents, so we can start with our day.”

Felicity liked Ms. Anderson. She had met her during the parents’ orientation day last week when all the parents had gotten to know each other and the teacher and they had been able to bring all the supplies the children needed for school.

“Time to say goodbye for the rest of the day,” Oliver said and crouched down, holding Millie on his thigh and putting his free arm around Tommy to pull him closer. Emmy let go of Felicity’s hand to step closer to her dad. Oliver smiled at her. “I am sure you will have a great day and sooner than you know it, we will be here to pick you up and you can show us your classroom and everything else.”

Emmy nodded, not saying a word. She just took her little sister’s hand, playing with the baby’s little fingers, and looked down at the floor.

“Let’s everyone kiss Emmy goodbye and wish her a lot of fun, right?”

Tommy was the first to hug his sister tightly before stepping back to Oliver’s side, resting his head against his dad’s shoulder and releasing a sigh. He hadn’t been too happy about the early hour his parents had woke him this morning. He was certainly going to be grumbling today.

Emmy kissed Millie’s cheek before she looked at her dad, who was still smiling encouragingly. He puckered his lips and immediately Emmy kissed him and hugged him close for a moment. Felicity watched the scene, feeling weirdly touched by it. It wasn’t the first time Emmy left them for a day. She had even spent weekends with their friends and family. Something was different about this, though.

When Emmy stepped away from her daddy, Felicity crouched down and reached out her hands for her daughter. Emmy took them and stepped close to her immediately. Felicity smiled at her encouragingly, combing the girl’s blonde hair with her fingers and moving a few strands behind her shoulder.

“I know you are nervous,” Felicity said soothingly. “It’s totally normal to be nervous because today is a big day. But you do remember what I told you yesterday, yes?”

Emmy nodded. “You will always love you.”

“Always,” Felicity emphasized once more, nodding her head. “I have no doubt that you will be great, though. You will learn a lot and you will have a lot of fun doing so.”

Again Emmy nodded, but she didn’t look exactly convinced. She played with her skirt before she looked back up at her mom. “Do I get a super special good-luck-kiss?”

“A super special good-luck-kiss?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

“The kind of kiss daddy gets before he…” Emmy took a quick look around before she moved her hands to her shoulders and pulled an invisible hood over her head. “That kind of kiss.”

Felicity smiled. “Absolutely.”

She puckered her lips and kissed Emmy’s lips. Instead of pulling away quickly, she let her lips linger and hummed, making Emmy giggle until she had to break the kiss. With joy Felicity watched most of the nervousness fading from Emmy’s face.

“Thank you, Mommy.”

“You’re welcome, Sweetie,” Felicity replied and hugged her daughter for a moment before she kissed her temple and let go of her, nodding to where Ms. Anderson was waiting for the kids. “And now go and have fun.”

Emmy nodded, taking in a deep breath, before she turned around walked towards Ms. Anderson. Felicity got up from her crouching position and stepped to Oliver’s side, taking Millie from his arms and kissing the crown of her baby’s head. She waved at Emmy before the girl disappeared into the building.

“Can you believe she is going to school now?” Oliver asked.

Felicity sighed. “Nope.”

“Rationally I know that with William we have another child going to school already, but…”

“This is the first time we actually see our child taking this step,” Felicity agreed. “It’s-“

“We eat ice cream now?” Tommy asked, interrupting his parents.

Oliver chuckled, lifting Tommy onto his arm. “We are eating ice cream when we pick Emmy back up.”

Tommy sighed. “Okay. We go to the park?”

Felicity smiled. The parents had been advised to stay close to the school, not in sight, but somewhere quickly available if possible. That way, in case a child wouldn’t make it till the end of the first school day without seeing his or her parents again, they could be back quickly. Felicity doubted that it was necessary for them, but she also didn’t want to take a risk, so she replied to Tommy, “That sounds like a perfect idea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t miss next week’s double update! We have the usual Thurday-update and then Sunday, February 26, I will post chapter 200! You will also get the blacked out chapter notes for the following 50 chapters either on February 26 or 27. I hope you will enjoy it! :)


	199. Proposal No. 2

With a deep sigh Felicity turned from her side onto her back. She stared at the ceiling for only a couple of seconds, cursing whatever higher power stopped her from sleeping, before she turned her head to look at Oliver. He was lying on his stomach, his arms hugging the pillow that his face was buried in for the most part. He was snoring softly, telling her that he was very much sleeping deeply.

Smiling, she turned on her side and watched him sleeping. Just a couple of years ago he would have never been able to sleep this peacefully. Instead of the content smile that was on his lips now, he would have frowned worriedly. He wouldn’t have snored because he would only sleep lightly. It had taken him a long time to feel safe enough in their home to really let go and sleep like this.

Felicity reached out her hand, her fingertips aching with the need to touch him and to gently stroke his stubble. She stopped herself, though, her fingers hovering right over his stubbled cheek. Not lowering her hand any more, she followed the curves of his body from his face over his neck and shoulder down to his ribs. The only time her fingertips actually touched him was when they brushed against his shoulder in the slightest of touch. Oliver didn’t move.

If she didn’t know how much trouble sleeping he had had until a few years ago when he had still woken up with heavy breathing and racing heart at least once a week, she might have considered waking him up to tired her out a little bit. With the way his naked chest was so close, his breathing making it move in a wonderful way, it could be easy to forget that Oliver needed his sleep and let her desire for her husband take over here.

She bit down on her bottom lip and pulled her hand back before the desire to touch him could grow even more. She shouldn’t wake him up. He needed his sleep. After Tommy had driven him crazy today like only the stubborn boy really could do, he had also had an exhausting night out in the streets. A gang of drug dealers had almost been able to escape, giving the team a hard time.

Biting down on her bottom lip to keep herself from sighing once more, Felicity rolled back onto her back and pushed an arm under her head. She was exhausted from work and she hadn’t had coffee since before lunch, so actually she should be able to fall asleep easily. She didn’t know why despite that she just couldn’t sleep. It didn’t really make sense for her not to fall asleep easily.

When she heard a low sigh from the nightstand, Felicity quickly turned her head to the baby monitor. She could see Millie lying in bed and playing with her feet, making happy sounds. Felicity quickly reached out her hand and turned off the volume of the monitor. Oliver’s snoring that had stopped at the sounds of their daughter’s sounds slowly started over again.

Felicity slid out of bed as quietly as possible, hoping that Oliver’s exhaustion would keep him from waking up as she knew he usually did if there was any sound. Luckily, his snoring continued uninterrupted, so she pushed the blanket away and tiptoed out of their bedroom, closing the door behind her quickly.

When she opened the door to Millie’s nursery, she switched on some dim light. It was just enough for her to see anything in the darkness of the room. Just like her older brother Tommy Millie preferred her room dark when she was supposed to sleep. Felicity stepped towards the nursery and looked at her youngest child. Millie’s lips widened to a joyful smile around the toes of her foot in her mouth.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked her daughter with a wide smile.

Millie pulled her foot out of her mouth to laugh amusedly before she pushed her toes back into her lips contently. Her big blue eyes never left her mommy’s face, though. Felicity watched her daughter for a long moment.

“You know, I could have raised at least ten babies like you for the same energy Emmy and Tommy demanded from me,” Felicity told Millie. “You make everything so easy. You are waking up in the middle of the night and just find a way to busy yourself. Who needs to wake up mommy and daddy when you’ve got toes to have fun with, right?”

At the excited tone of her mother’s voice Millie squealed happily. Eventually she let go of her foot to reach out her arms for her mother, making grabby hands. Felicity chuckled.

“Cuddling with mommy is just so much better than sucking your toes, isn’t it?”

Felicity lifted the five-months-old baby into her arms, letting her little girl’s head rest against her shoulder. Smiling, Felicity kissed Millie’s temple and took her to the rocking chair. Sitting down in the soft cushions cross-legged, she cradled her daughter against her chest and looked down at the content girl, who now grabbed a strand of her mother’s hair and tugged at it happily.

“You know, when your sister was younger, daddy and I used to tell her stories about us before she was born,” Felicity said quietly, stroking her fingertips over her baby’s rosy cheek. “I don’t know why we stopped doing that, but we haven’t done so in a long time. How about I tell you a story that I think daddy and I never told Emmy because we just never got around doing so. Would you like that?”

Millie smiled happily, kicking her feet in excitement. Felicity decided to take that as a yes.

 

_“I don’t know what I am supposed to wear!” Felicity said with a whine and sat down at the edge of the bed. “Oliver, say something!”_

_Oliver puckered his lips looking up and down her body that was only dressed in a set of dark green lingerie, lingerie that she had bought just for him awhile ago. He shrugged his shoulders. “Just go like that.”_

_Taking the pillow from right behind her, she tossed it at him. Unfortunately her aim was so weak that she missed him at least an arm’s length. Oliver chuckled amusedly and Felicity rolled her eyes, letting her chest fall back onto the mattress._

_“You’re not helping,” Felicity groaned, putting her hands over her face for a moment before she sat up and shot Oliver a piercing glare. “You do know that this is all your fault, right?”_

_“My fault?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows and pointing at himself. “My fault how?”_

_“Well, picking a dress to wear would be much less of a problem if I didn’t know that I am actually not just going out to have some fun with Thea but that you are going to propose to me tonight,” Felicity explained, not giving him the chance to speak and continuing instead, “What weird nonsense is this proposal by the way? You already proposed to me. I already said yes. Why doing it again?”_

_“First of all I didn’t propose to you yet.”_

_“Oh really?” Felicity asked, looking at him with her head cocked, before she turned her head and looked at the bed meaningfully._

_If she wasn’t wrong, she saw the slightest of a blush forming on his cheeks before cleared his throat and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He lifted his chin and pursed his lips._

_“That wasn’t a proposal.”_

_“You said ‘Marry me’,” Felicity replied. “It sounded a lot like a proposal to me.”_

_Oliver pressed his lips together for a long moment before he lowered his gaze. Slowly he came to the bed and sat down on the edge of the mattress next to her. Felicity frowned, watching him closely. In the short time they had been together now she had barely ever seen him like this. He didn’t just look vulnerable, a side of himself he was still growing comfortable to show to her. He almost looked almost sad._

_“Talk to me,” she prompted him in a whisper like she had several times these last months._

_Releasing a sigh, Oliver turned towards her by pulling one leg onto the mattress. He took her hands. “I… When I… The way I proposed was not how I had planned this out. I had a real plan for a really romantic thing.”_

_“Yeah, but you did ask me already now and I said yes, so why still holding onto the-“_

_“You just deserve so much better than a proposal in the middle of an orgasm,” Oliver told her, his face screwed up like he didn’t like hearing the words coming from his lips. “I know you don’t mind and I know you already said yes, but I would like to go through with the plan I made and give you the proposal you deserve, the whole damn romantic thing.”_

_Oliver squeezed her hands, looking at her urgently. Felicity took in a deep breath and sighed quietly. She could see how important this was to him. He was already robbed of so many important moments in his life and given that both his parents were dead and the life he lived was everything but easy, she couldn’t take this away from him. She couldn’t deny him the memory of having proposed in the most romantic way if that was what he wanted._

_“Besides,” Oliver added before Felicity could have told him that she was already convinced, “the team helped me with this and I don’t really want to explain to them why I departed from the plan.”_

_Felicity pressed her lips together and pulled them into her mouth. She tried not to think about the looks on their friends’ faces if Oliver told them that he had asked her to marry him while they had been in bed, enjoying a quite intimate moment with each other. Their friends were still kind of getting used to Felicity’s innuendos that revealed way too many details about her and Oliver’s sex life. Hearing from him that this sacred moment of proposing had taken place during sex was probably going to elicit a reaction that was not so great. She could almost hear them groan in unison about hearing that._

_“Well, you already convinced me before,” Felicity said slowly, “but since I actually want to have the chance to talk to my friends about the proposal, I have an extra reason to go through with the plan.”_

_“Thank you,” Oliver whispered with a smile and leaned forward, capturing her lips in a gentle kiss. His fingertips stroked over her cheek lovingly. When their lips parted, he leaned back a little. “How about you wear the red dress you bought last week?”_

_Felicity groaned, letting herself fall back onto the mattress and putting her arm in front of her eyes again. “I would wear that for a date.”_

_“We do have a date later.”_

_“That I am not supposed to know of!” Felicity reminded him. When she heard him chuckle, Felicity moved her arm a little to look at him. He didn’t have the decency to even try hiding his amusement, so she said with all seriousness she could, “I hate you. You know that?”_

Millie giggled.

“Yeah, mommy told daddy she hated him,” Felicity told him. “Wanna know a secret, though? Mommy didn’t really hate him. She was just a little bit angry because he didn’t help her at all with his suggestions for something to wear. He got so much better at it in these last years. Really, if you ever need someone to help you pick an outfit and mommy isn’t around, just ask daddy. He knows a lot about fashion. He was voted best-dressed man by several magazines by now. He got that handled.”

Felicity smiled. When she felt insecure, sometime she would ask Oliver what to wear and no matter the occasion – private as much as work related – he really was a competent consultant. Besides, he knew her wardrobe almost as well as she did.

“Anyway,” Felicity continued eventually, looking at Millie with a smile, “what you should have understood so far is that daddy proposed to mommy during a… very private moment. Mommy already said yes, but daddy wanted to ask her once more, so mommy agreed. Daddy had also asked Uncle John and Uncle Roy as well as Aunt Lyla, Aunt Thea and Aunt Laurel to help him with the proposal. He actually made it a mission to propose to me, but that is a completely different story and mommy didn’t know about that at that time, so it doesn’t matter right now.”

Smiling, Felicity leaned down and gently kissed her daughter’s forehead. Millie’s little body was warm and heavy in her arms, a comforting weight Felicity liked to feel.

“So mommy finally decided for a dark red dress with an A-line skirt and a really nice cut-out at the back,” Felicity told Millie. “Daddy always liked to stroke his fingertips against the exposed skin, and since mommy likes that very much, she has a lot of dresses that allow daddy to do that. Aunt Thea picked mommy up from the loft, because mommy lived there with daddy and Aunt Thea back then, and they spent the day together having fun shopping and so on. When the night came closer, Aunt Thea didn’t take mommy home like they had officially agreed on, though. Instead she took mommy to the beach house that grandma Moira and granddad Robert owed before daddy got it. Of course mommy actually knew why Aunt Thea was doing it, but Aunt Thea didn’t know that mommy knew, so mommy had to pretend that she didn’t know why Aunt Thea wasn’t taking her back to the loft. Can you follow me?”

Millie kicked her feet a little tiredly, but she smiled, releasing a low sound of excitement. Felicity smiled at her daughter. Of course she understood. Smoak and Queen Women were the smartest after all, weren’t they?

“Okay, so Aunt Thea took mommy to the beach house.”

 

_“What are we doing here?” Felicity asked, trying to sound thoroughly nosy. She kept her eyes out of the window where the Queen Family’s beach house came closer. “Isn’t that your family’s beach house?”_

_When Thea didn’t reply, Felicity shot her a look and perked up an eyebrow. Her friend just smiled to herself and directed the car right in front of the beautiful house. Only when the car stopped, she turned her head to Felicity, smiling softly._

_“Let’s just say these last days we spent together I did my brother a favor,” she explained._

_Before Felicity got to figure out what to say to that, the door at her side was already opened and Oliver’s smiling face appeared._

_“Hi, Thea,” he said, looking past Felicity at his younger sister. “I’ll take care of Felicity from here.”_

_“Take care of me?” Felicity asked, hoping to sound believably wondering._

_Oliver just winked at her and reached out his hand for her. Without a beat of hesitation Felicity put her hand into his and let him help her out of the car. While he was pulling her close, whispering into her ear that she was doing great, he kicked the door of the car shut and Thea drove away. Sighing with relief, Felicity melted against Oliver’s warm chest. She leaned her forehead against his shoulder, breathing in the comforting scent of his skin._

_“Finally,” she sighed eventually, leaning her head back and smiling at Oliver. “I don’t know if I would have been able to keep up the act much longer.”_

_Oliver chuckled. He put his hands to her hips and pulled her even closer. Brushing his lips against hers, he whispered, “Don’t look there, but Roy is watching us from the rooftop of the breach house.”_

_Felicity frowned, keeping her face close to Oliver’s so she wouldn’t even get tempted to look at where Roy was probably hovering in the rooftop watching them. Instead she just asked against Oliver’s lips, “Why?”_

_“Didn’t want to get interrupted again,” he replied in whisper._

_“Our first date,” Felicity whispered back knowingly._

_Their first date had exploded, resulting in a terrible long wait for them to finally find their way to each other. Oliver had been too scared of losing her to let himself love her the way they both would have deserved. Once Felicity hadn’t allowed him push her away anymore, everything had fallen into place easily. Why else would they be at the beach house, both knowing that Oliver would propose to her again here for a second time, not even three months after starting their relationship?_

_Oliver kissed her gently, erasing all the memories of what had happened since that catastrophic end to their first date. Whatever had happened didn’t matter now because they were here and they were together and they were never going to let go of each other again. Whatever had happened to them before had only taken them here, so it couldn’t be so bad after all because this place was just perfect._

_When their lips parted, Oliver tightened his hold on her hips once more, giving them a gently squeeze. He nodded his head towards the house. “Come on, we should get going with the plan.”_

_Taking her hand and tugging her close, he led her over the veranda to the back of the house. A path of candles led them the way. There was a candle on each wood panel, a lot of red and white rose petals between the candles._

_“This is beautiful,” Felicity whispered._

_Oliver smiled. “Laurel helped me a little, setting up his whole thing.”_

_Felicity chuckled. “So Thea kept me busy, Roy safeguards the whole location and Laurel helped you decorating the porch,” she said, cocking her head at him. “Anything else you made our friends do?”_

_“Lyla cooked the dinner we are going to eat,” Oliver admitted._

_“That’s probably better for both of our health since we know that you can’t cook.”_

_“You just don’t allow me to try.”_

_“That’s because I know that you can’t cook,” Felicity only responded once more. “I am sure if you ever decide to cook for me what you really want is to poison me.”_

_Oliver kissed her temple. “I knew you’d say that.”_

_“It’s because you know me so well,” Felicity replied and turned her head. Their lips met in a short kiss before they arrived at the back of the beach house. Her eyes widened at the sight in front of her. “Wow.”_

_A small table was set perfectly romantic, just like the floor with rose petals and candles. They had a perfect view on the ocean, the quiet sounds of the waves their background music. She had never been given anything more perfect._

_“You like it?” Oliver asked, stepping behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and snuggled his cheek to hers. Ducking his head, he kissed her shoulder and tightened his hold on her waist. “You do?”_

_Felicity nodded. “It’s perfect.”_

_“I told you I wanted a better proposal for you,” Oliver whispered, his lips brushing against the shell of her ear. “This is just the dating part of the evening, though. We will take a walk after dinner. John will prepare this place for when we come back in the meantime. You will just have to wait a little longer for the actual proposal.”_

_“Well, first of all I got the actual proposal already,” Felicity told him and leaned back against him comfortably. “Secondly, I was already guessing what role John would play in all of this.”_

_Oliver kissed her shoulder once more before he pushed a chair back for her and smiled. “Please have a seat, Ms. Smoak. I will serve the supper.”_

_Felicity smiled. She knew that he enjoyed calling her Ms. Smoak, especially now that they knew that soon she’d be Mrs. Queen. They had talked about this only a couple of days ago, when they had lain awake at night, and Felicity had told him that she couldn’t be happier. She had agreed to taking on his surname because she loved Oliver and she loved how he was entitled to right his family’s reputation after everything that had happened those last years since the Gambit had sunken._

_Mrs. Felicity Megan Queen, Felicity thought to herself with a smile. She could almost hear people call her that. Besides, she already knew that every once in a while Oliver would call her Ms. Smoak again, just to remind the two of them of old times. She’d enjoy that as much as she enjoyed the thought of becoming Mrs. Queen already._

_“Well, I am excited to see what you ordered for us, Mr. Queen.”_

 

“Hey, are you falling asleep in the middle of the story?” Felicity asked Mae, looking down at her daughter, who blinked repeatedly. “You weren’t up for such a long time of being awake, weren’t you? Well, you couldn’t know mommy would be awake too and decide to tell you a story, could you?”

Millie only smiled sleepily, grabbing Felicity’s fingers and holding onto them.

“So,” Felicity said slowly. “Mommy and daddy had a wonderful dinner. Aunt Lyla really did an amazing job with that. She actually cooked meals from recipes I got from my grandma. Daddy couldn’t cook at that time yet, you know? Today he would cook everything himself and he would also prepare everything himself. You know, your dad is kind of a sap when it comes to such things, but I love that. He really is a great husband and daddy. I couldn’t have picked any better guy. Anyway, when we finished dinner, daddy took my hand and persuaded me into taking a walk though mommy really didn’t need much persuasion. Mommy already knew that he was going to propose to her now and she couldn’t wait, so she was kind of eager to go take a walk with him and she was very happy when they were finally getting to the private landing for the boats of the Queen Family. It was a really romantic place. You know, Uncle John put a lot of candles and rose petals there to make it even more romantic. You see? The whole Arrow family was helping that night.”

 

_“It’s really beautiful here,” Felicity said, leaning back against Oliver’s chest and resting her head against his shoulder. She looked at the calm ocean in the darkness, enjoying the quiet sounds of the waves and the salty scent in the air. She turned her head a little, looking at Oliver’s face. The profile-view she had on him accentuated his wonderfully strong jar and the edgy parts of his face. “Were you here often with your family?”_

_An expression of pain ghosted over his face before he ducked his head, resting his chin on her shoulder. His eyes were focused on the horizon, looking at the ocean reverently. “Sometimes, yes. We spent weekends here, just my parents, Thea and me. It was wonderful.”_

_Felicity smiled, picturing a younger Oliver playing in the sand with Baby Thea while a much younger and much more unburdened Moira and Robert would watch them. It was nice knowing that the Queen Family had had their good times and it hadn’t always been as messy as Felicity knew it had been since the Gambit had gone done, probably even some time before that already given both Robert’s and Moira’s affairs._

_“I am happy you took me here,” Felicity whispered, snuggling her cheek to his._

_Oliver turned his head and kissed her cheek before his let his hands travel from her stomach to her hips and turned her around. He brushed his lips against hers in a chaste kiss before he turned back enough to look at her with a smile. It was that one smile Felicity knew was reserved for her. He didn’t look at anyone else like that, only ever at her. Her heart skipped a beat, knowing that this was the moment._

_“Well, I’d say you probably wonder why I decided to prepare this night for us,” Oliver said with a chuckle she had gotten wonderfully used to during the last weeks, “but we both know why I did, don’t we?”_

_Felicity smiled. “I have an idea.”_

_Oliver took her hands, squeezing them. Even in the dark of the night she could see how nervous he was. He had the same excitedly nervous expression on his face as he had had during their first date. Felicity was sure it was the same for her. She could feel her heart racing in her chest though she had already said yes. This just felt so much more official._

_“Felicity,” Oliver started and took in a deep breath, “I know we haven’t been together very long which… is mainly my fault.”_

_“Not going to fight you on that,” she replied with a wink, trying to lighten the mood._

_Oliver smiled a little less nervously, even huffing out a breath of laughter before he continued, “Since I finally gave in and allowed myself to be with you, I am happier than I ever have been. You make me happier than I have been in the past eight years, happier than I have ever been really.”_

_“I am happy with you, too,” Felicity whispered back, feeling her throat growing tight already._

_Oliver took in a deep breath and went on his knee, still holding both of her hands in his. He loosened his right hand from her fingers and pushed it into the pocket of his pants instead. When he pulled out a velvety box and opened it, revealing a beautiful diamond ring, the breath got caught in her throat. She had known that he had a ring because he had told her so after they had celebrated their engagement with a second round of sex. Yet she was amazed by how stunning the ring really looked._

_“Felicity Smoak, will you make me the happiest man on the face of the earth?”_

_Unable to speak, Felicity just nodded her head. She held her free hand in front of her lips, keeping herself from sobbing._

_“Is that a yes?” Oliver asked._

_“Yes,” Felicity replied, a tear escaping the corner of her eye and rolling down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away and went down on her knees, too. She framed Oliver’s face with her hands and kissed him. Her whole body felt like it was tingling, the joy spreading from her heart through her body until every single cell of her was filled with it. “Yes, yes, yes. A thousand times yes.”_

_Oliver kissed her once more before he got up and helped Felicity onto her feet. His fingers freed the ring from the box and gently pushed it onto her ring finger. He was so careful, treating her hand with so much tenderness. It was hard to believe that the very same fingers would shoot arrows at people and snap necks._

_When the ring was perfectly in place, Oliver kissed Felicity one more time before he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a tight hug. Her feet dangled a little over the floor, but she couldn’t care less. She loved the way Oliver held her so tightly, barely leaving her room to breathe. She could stay like this for the rest of her life and be perfectly happy. A wide smile spread on her lips when she realized that the rest of her life would be filled with moments like this._

_She turned her head, pressing her face against the side of Oliver’s neck, and breathed in the scent of his skin. Oliver had been right. A proposal like this had been a good idea because in a way only now Felicity realized that she was really going to get to spend the rest of her life with Oliver. It was going to be him and her for the next fifty years or so and that was something she was looking forward to a lot._

Felicity smiled at the memory, her whole body feeling warm and content. It had been almost seven years since that night, but even all this time, two weddings and four kids later it still made her happy thinking about this very beginning of their little family.

“It’s a nice ring, isn’t it?” Felicity asked Millie when the little girl started playing with the engagement ring on her mother’s finger. “Daddy designed it. It looks similar to the one grandpa Robert gave grandma Moira, but it also includes some elements that are new and that he added himself. He really put a lot of thought in this, you know? And that’s why daddy is the best.”

Millie squealed, kicking her little feet, suddenly not sleepy anymore at all. When Felicity looked down at her daughter, she saw her looking towards the door. She didn’t have to turn her head and follow her baby’s eyes to know what was going on.

“Why are you up?” Felicity asked, looking back over her shoulder to where Oliver was leaning in the frame of the door with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

“I could ask you the same,” Oliver told her.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, looking back at Millie. “I just couldn’t sleep and then I saw that Millie couldn’t sleep either, so I decided we could spend a little time together.”

“Well, I was sleeping peacefully, but when I figured that the other side of the bed was empty, I woke up. Then I saw you and Millie on the baby monitor, turned up the volume and listened to the story you told her,” Oliver replied. He approached them slowly and sat down on the arm rest of the couch. “Then I decided to come here and join you.”

He kissed the crown of her head, making Felicity smile. “I just realized it’s been so long since we told the kids a story like that. When Emmy was younger, we almost did that every day.”

“I know,” Oliver replied. He rested his chin on her head and stroked his fingertips of Millie’s rosy cheek. “Maybe we’ll get back to that one day.”

“Yes, maybe,” Felicity responded with a yawn.

Oliver chuckled and kissed the crown of her head once more before he suggested, “Come on, we go back to bed.”

“What about Millie?”

“I am sure we can make a little room for her between us,” Oliver replied and winked.

A couple of minutes later they settled in bed, Millie lying safe and sound between her parents. The little girl fell asleep before Oliver and Felicity had even found the best position for them to sleep in yet.

Lacing her fingers through Oliver’s on their daughter’s tummy, Felicity whispered, “You know, I’d still say yes every time.”

Oliver smiled. “I’d still ask you every time.”

“Good thing we are on the same page here.”

“We always are, aren’t we?”

“At least most of the times,” Felicity agreed and squeezed his fingers. “Night, Oliver.”

“Night, Babe.”

Felicity chuckled, perking up an eyebrow. “Babe? In seven years I can’t remember that you ever called me ‘babe’.”

“Hey, I am just keeping our marriage exciting.”

“Our marriage is exciting as it is,” she told him.

“So no calling you ‘babe’?”

“Hm…” Felicity made. “Not sure yet. I need to hear it a few times before I can decide.”

“Alright then. I will just keep saying it… Sleep tight, Babe.”

Felicity closed her eyes, moving her head a little closer to Millie until her nose rested against her baby’s temple. She was really tired now, so hopefully it wasn’t going to take her too long to finally fall asleep.

“Hey, Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“I don’t think I will continue calling you ‘babe’ much longer.”

Felicity chuckled to herself quietly. “Why?”

“I think my favorite way to call you is still ‘Felicity’. It’s better than any pet name.”

“Good,” Felicity replied with a sleepy sigh, “because I like saying your name best, too.”

“Well, one more proof we always are on the same page.”

“Yeah, looks like it,” she said, sighing once more before falling asleep with a content smile on her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always knew I wanted to write the proposal that was supposed to be the real one. You only had to wait 179 chapters for this story to finally be here. :D
> 
> DON'T FORGET! The next chapter will be posted on Sunday! I will also post the blacked out plan for the next 50 chapters by then.
> 
> If you are nosy, you can find my WIP posts [here](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/157154900200/time-for-a-story).


	200. All you need is love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally it’s here - The 200th chapter in celebration of Time for a story’s second birthday. I can’t picture my life without this story anymore.
> 
> Thanks everyone for supporting the story! I can guarantee that were are still a lot of stories left to tell for Olicity, their family and their friends!

“Okay, I really, really, really don’t want you to stop what you are doing,” Felicity said breathlessly, her fingers moving through Oliver’s short hair though she wasn’t sure if she wanted to push him away or pull him even closer, “but I think it’s only fair to tell you that I will have to head out in forty-five minutes and I really need to shower first, so there is absolutely no way I’m able to give you back for this immediately.”

“Oh, well if that’s the case-“

“What? No, no, no!” Felicity whined, quickly pressing her thighs together to keep Oliver from pulling away. “I don’t want you to stop. You gotta be the amazing husband that tells me it’s not that bad I can’t give you back for that right now because we have the rest of our lives for me to return the favor.”

Oliver chuckled, putting a hand to her knee and pushing her legs apart a little, so he could turn his head and rest his cheek against her upper thigh. Felicity looked at him, her hand tightening in his hair in case he would make another attempt of moving away from her. She was sure if he pulled away any more than he did right now, she would lose her sanity. Oliver seemed contently relaxed where he was, though, licking his lips in a way that made a jolt of pleasure go right to her core and elicited a whiny moan from her lips.

“Needy much?” Oliver asked with a smug grin, his breath ghosting over her already wet folds as he was speaking.

“You know exactly why I’m needy.”

“Oh, poor you,” Oliver replied, sounding everything but sorry, and turned his head to place another kiss to the inside of her thigh. “What are we going to do about it?”

“How about you just continue where you have stopped half a minute ago?” Felicity asked between clenched teeth. She pulled at Oliver’s hair to get him to continue the path up her thigh that his lips had taken before, but he refused to let himself be moved. “Come on, Oliver, you can’t start something like this and then just stop halfway through.”

Fifteen minutes ago she had woken up to Oliver’s fingers undoing the buttons of his shirt that she had been wearing to sleep and kissing down her chest. His tongue had dipped into her belly button for a moment before he had moved further down the bed between her legs. His fingers had hooked into the waistband of her panties and pulled them down. Then he had slowly started trailing kisses up the inside of her thigh.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have reminded me that you are going to leave then,” Oliver replied in a teasing tone. “It’s almost like you wanted me to stop.”

“We both know I didn’t,” Felicity growled. She tried to move her hips to get closer to his lips, but Oliver quickly put an arm over them to keep her from moving. “Oliver, please. I am wet and needy and- oh my god!”

Felicity gasped for air when Oliver’s forefinger thrust inside of her without any warning. Once again she tried to move her hips to get his finger to slide in even deeper, but Oliver’s hold on her was unwavering. When his finger curled inside of her slowly, a long moan escaped Felicity’s lips and she put her legs to Oliver’s shoulder, seeking more contact and rubbing her thighs against the scratchy stubble on his cheeks.

“You really are wet,” Oliver said, pulling his finger out of her and pushing it into his mouth, licking her juices from it. He frowned for a short moment, sucking the last of her juices from his finger before he shook his head and put the teasing smile back on. “And I can also see you are needy. Too bad you don’t have time for this, right?”

“But I do have time for this!”

Oliver snorted and blew a breath against her folds, making Felicity’s hips buck as much as they could under his strong hold. “Yeah, you have time for me eating you out, but you don’t have time for anything else, do you?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, her hips still squirming without success. She thought about reminding him how much he actually loved eating her out because she knew he did. She also knew he very much loved teasing her in bed, so he could go on like this forever, so she was sure that there was only one easy way out of this for her now.

“How about a deal?”

Oliver bit into the soft skin right next to her knee and perked up his eyebrows. “Consider me intrigued.”

“I have a new lipstick,” Felicity told him, trying to sound more seductive and a little bit less needy but was also sure she was failing miserably. “You eat me out now and I will give you the same treatment tonight.”

The second she saw the dark glint in his eyes Felicity knew she had won. Grinning smugly, she scratched Oliver’s scalp before she grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled his head closer to the juncture of her thighs. She could almost feel his stubble against her sensitive folds and her breath got caught in her throat at the feeling.

“You have your deal, Mrs. Queen.”

As soon as the last syllable had fallen from his lips, they closed around her clit, eliciting a loud moan from her. Felicity tried to arch her back, but Oliver’s forearm pinned her down onto the mattress. While her right hand tightened in his hair, her left hand clawed into his forearm. She was sure that her fingernails were leaving marks on his skin, but Felicity couldn’t care less as Oliver’s tongue and lips worked their wonderful magic on her.

The flat of his tongue rubbed against her clit repeatedly, taking her on a high wave of pleasure in like no time. Before that wave could wrap her in and pull her with it, he moved away from her clit to lick a long path between her folds. His tongue circled her entrance, making Felicity moan out loud.

Oliver had been so great at this from the first time he had eaten her out, but Felicity was sure he had gotten even better over the years. He knew exactly where she was most sensitive for the touch of his lips and tongue. He knew exactly what each of her sounds meant, knew what each of her movements meant. Oliver just knew her inside out and that was what made the sex even better.

While his tongue was slowly licking back up to her clit, he thrust two fingers inside of her.

“Oh god, Oliver,” Felicity moaned out.

As much as she tried to move her hips to answer the thrusts of his fingers, Oliver wouldn’t let her. He just kept licking between her folds and pumped his fingers in and out of her almost lazily. It was a lot and yet not nearly enough.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity whined, trying to urge him to go faster.

Oliver smirked against her folds and leaned his cheek against her thigh. When he moved his head a little, his stubble scratched over her soft skin. Felicity loved when he did that and her fingernails scratched over his scalp appreciatively. Oliver released a dark growl in response, sending vibrations around her clit when he wrapped his lips back around the little bundle of nerves.

“Yes,” Felicity moaned out.

His tongue and fingers were moving faster now, working in perfect synch. Whenever the tip of his tongue rubbed over her clit, his fingers thrust inside of her. The double friction made heat pool in the pit of her stomach and crawl all over her skin. She moved her thighs closer together, trapping Oliver’s head between them to keep him where he was doing his magic. Her feet moved on his back, trying to find purchase there, so she could maybe move against his lips despite the hold he had on her hips, but she didn’t find any.

Oliver increased her pleasure more and more, never letting it overtake her, though. Felicity felt like she was right on the edge. Her toes were prickling and she could feel her body aching with the need to come. Only when Oliver curled his fingers inside of her and sucked at her clit at the same time, the pleasure washed over her.

“Oliver,” his name fell from her lips in a long moan.

Her body shook involuntarily and her inner walls clamped down on Oliver’s fingers that kept pushing in and of her in time with the rubbing of his tongue over her clit to prolong her orgasm. His arm let go of her hips, finally letting her move against his mouth. Felicity didn’t waste a second, grinding her sex against Oliver’s face, enjoying every last moments of her pleasure. His hand stroked up and down her thigh gently in the meantime until she caught his hand and held onto it.

When her movements slowly turned down, her body coming down from the high of her orgasm, Oliver pulled his fingers out of her and kissed her clit one last time. Then his lips slid up her body over the soft skin of her stomach, chest and neck until they met hers. Felicity pressed her lips to his eagerly, moaning at the taste of herself on his tongue. Her legs wrapped around Oliver’s hips, their bodies melting together in the most perfect way, and Felicity put her arms around his waist to hold him to her tightly while they were both enjoying this moment of intimacy between them.

The moment Oliver’s hips rubbed against hers, his hard member moving against her still sensitive folds through his boxer briefs, she put her hands to his shoulders and pushed him off of her. As tempting as it was to stay in bed longer and let Oliver seduce her into having some more sex with him, she had other plans, more important plans she should probably add. When Oliver only pulled away a little bit, cocking his head, she smiled at him.

“Tonight,” Felicity promised and with a dark growl Oliver rolled off of her and slumped into the bed next to her. Turning her head, she kissed his shoulder. “Thanks.”

She could feel Oliver’s gaze on the back of her neck when she sat up, put her hair over one shoulder and pulled the shirt he had unbuttoned before together in front of her chest.

“Are you going to tell me where you’re going?” Oliver asked after a moment.

Felicity looked back at him over her shoulder, finding him lying on his side with his head propped up onto his hand. He was smiling softly in a way that was reserved just for her and it still didn’t fail to make her stomach flutter softly.

“I can’t tell you,” she replied, smiling back at him apologetically. “Sorry.”

Oliver gasped for breath dramatically, put his hands to his chest over his heart and said, “Oh my god. You refuse to have sex with me and now you are also keeping secrets. If this is where our marriage is going, better shoot me right now because my heart is still whole.”

Felicity chuckled, crawling onto the mattress and kneeling next to him. “First of all I didn’t refuse to have sex with you; I just had to delay it a little. Secondly, I am just keeping this mini secret and it won’t even be for very long. I just promised not to tell anyone, especially not you. I will tell you later today, though. And thirdly I love you, my little drama queen, and our marriage is going exactly where it is supposed to go.”

“Drama queen? Me?” Oliver asked with another dramatic gasp for air. In a quick move he pulled Felicity against him and rolled himself on top of her, tickling her sides until she was laughing and squirming under him, kicking her feet to get away from him. “You better take that back.”

“Okay! I take it back! I take it back!” she said breathlessly. When Oliver let upon on her, she wiped a tear that had rolled down her cheek from all the laughing away with her fingers. She looked at Oliver and perked her eyebrows at the intense expression in his eyes. “What?”

“Where do you think our marriage is going?”

“Well, towards forever of course,” Felicity told him.

Oliver smiled, stroking the knuckles of his hands over her cheek gently. “Who’s the sap now, Mrs. Queen?”

“Still you,” Felicity replied without hesitation, “but since you refused to act like your usual sappy self and tell me that you don’t need anything back for eating me out, I figured I would have to take over your obligation.”

“That’s really thoughtful of you.”

“I am a great wife,” she said with an amused smile about their teasing.

“That you are,” Oliver replied.

They smiled at each other for a long moment, wordlessly telling each other how much they still loved each other and how much they loved these light moments where they could tease each other and just have fun. Felicity couldn’t remember how often she had wondered if this was what average marriages were like or if she and Oliver were just particularly lucky with each other. It didn’t exactly matter, though, did it? They had each other and nothing would ever change that.

Felicity lifted her head from the pillow and brushed her lips against Oliver’s gently. He opened her lips with his tongue and she sighed into the kiss. Their tongues met in an unhurried dance of love before Felicity cupped his cheeks and gently pushed his face away with a deep sigh.

“I really need to shower now,” she whispered.

Oliver growled something in Russian that she didn’t understand before he rolled off of her and got out of the bed. “I gotta wake Millie up anyway or she won’t nap later on and then she won’t sleep tonight and then you can’t keep your part of the deal.”

Felicity chuckled. “Oh, we wouldn’t want that to happen, would be?”

While he was putting on his sweatpants and a shirt, Felicity strolled to the bathroom. She leaned into the door frame and looked at Oliver, watching him getting dressed. When his eyes met hers, he smiled and winked.

“Wanna know a secret that’s going to distract you from the other secret I have?”

“Shoot,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“The new lipstick I bough?” Felicity asked, licking her lips at the darkening of Oliver’s pupils at her words. “It is red.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, not saying a word. Felicity even wondered if he would walk over to her and press her against the doorframe to take her right here and now. Instead he just released a grown and strolled out of the bedroom, shaking his head, “Great, now I can’t think about anything else the entire day.”

He looked back over his shoulder and winked once more, mouthing an “I love you” on the way. Felicity watched him disappearing into Millie’s nursery before she stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. She would have to cut the shower short, but it had been so worth it.

 

“Okay, it’s done,” Lyla said with a sigh.

She smiled nervously when she stepped into the living room and waved with the pregnancy test in her fingers. Under her friends’ gazes she stepped to the couch table and put her pregnancy test to the other three that were already lying on the wooden table. She pulled a towel over the tests to hide them and slumped onto the couch next to Felicity, who laced her fingers with her friend’s immediately.

Lyla had called Felicity yesterday and told her that she was late on her period, nine weeks late to be exact which was really later. Apparently Lyla had tried to ignore all the signs, telling herself it was just stress because after months of trying for a second baby without success she didn’t want to get her hopes up too much. She also didn’t want to tell John before she knew the result because she didn’t want him to be disappointed either. That was why Lyla had asked Felicity to plan a pregnancy test party and Felicity had called Thea and Laurel to make sure they were coming, too.

When Felicity had figured that she might be pregnant the first time – something that had been proved to be right because she had been carrying Emmy at that time – she had told her friends about the pregnancy test parties that some of her friends had done when they had thought they were pregnant in college. When there was more than one person taking a test, no matter the probability of a positive result, it just took a little bit of the nervousness away from the person who actually needed the test. Besides, there were people around to comfort you if the result called for it. That was certainly was a bonus.

Anyway, that was why they had met at Lyla’s place twenty minutes ago and had all peed on a test. Now the probably longest seven minutes in Lyla’s life would start while they were waiting for the results.

Felicity had taken two pregnancy tests in her life and both of the times the waiting had been pure hell. The first time she had had her friends around for a pregnancy test party just like this one. The second time she had been walking up and down nervously in the house, her gaze fixated on the plastic stick. Both of the times the test had turned out positive, just like she had hoped it would.

“Are you nervous?” Felicity asked, knowing that talking would help her friend.

“Very,” Lyla admitted, squeezing Felicity’s hand tightly. “Thanks for doing this with me.”

“Of course we do,” Laurel replied with a smile. “That’s what friends do.”

“Besides, we did it for Felicity and I kind of count on you doing this with me when Roy and I start trying for a baby,” Thea explained with a somewhat nervous smile.

“Did you talk about it yet?” Felicity asked. “Having kids I mean?”

Thea shrugged her shoulders. “We didn’t say it directly, but we did talk about the next steps to take and we might have not exactly been too careful with protection. We are not really in a hurry about it because we still have a lot of time, but then we wouldn’t mind either and since we are getting married in a few months anyway... Besides, Roy and I love taking care of Emmy, Tommy and Millie. I think that proved to the both of us that we really want to have children. It’s a good feeling and babysitting is good practice by the way.”

“That it is,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head. “Sara was my and Oliver’s way to practice.”

Felicity smiled, thinking back at the time before she and Oliver had had their own kids. They had babysat Sara a lot, using every opportunity they had gotten. Since neither of them had had experience with babies, it had been new and something they had learned together. Just like they had learned being parents together. They had just grown into it somehow.

The four friends stayed quiet for a moment, neither of them saying a word.

“Where did you send John and Sara?” Felicity asked.

“Sara is with my sister and John is at the lair,” Lyla explained. “Did you tell Oliver about this?”

“No, of course not.”

“And I didn’t tell Roy,” Thea replied.

“Well, I don’t really have anyone I could have told,” Laurel replied slowly, making a face and getting a chuckle from her friends in response.

“You will find someone, too,” Thea promise, putting an arm around her friend.

“Hey, I am in no hurry.  I have all my little nieces and nephews to take care of. Well, not that we are actually related, but-“

“You’re still family,” Thea assured.

“How much longer?” Lyla asked nervously.

“A little more than four minutes,” Felicity explained, squeezing her friend’s hand. “Don’t worry. The time will pass.”

“I just hate waiting. It’s the worst part of this and-“

The ringing of Felicity’s phone interrupted Lyla. Felicity smiled at her friend apologetically and quickly pulled her phone out from the pocket of her pants. She frowned when she saw Oliver’s face on the display.

“Hey, is something wrong?” she asked immediately.

“Kind of,” Oliver said with a sigh. “John called. We all need to come to the lair. Three criminals escaped the police when they were supposed to be brought to a different prison. They must have planned this for a long time because they have been picked up by a black van and shot have been fired. One officer is hurt and in a critical condition. They are said to be highly dangerous and will probably leave bodies right and left if necessary to get out of the city, so we should get going on that.”

“Alright. I’m on my way,” Felicity said. “Where are the kids?”

“Your mom is on your way here to take care of them.”

“Okay, great. I’ll see you at the lair. Oh, and you just have to call Roy. I am with Thea, Laurel and Lyla, so I will just tell them to come with me.”

There was a long pause at the other end of the line while Felicity gave their friends a look and pretended to be shooting an arrow to make them know what was going on. Immediately they all got up to put on their shoes and grab their jackets.

“What are you four concocting?” Oliver asked meanwhile.

“Nothing,” Felicity replied immediately, putting on her own shoes.

“I am not exactly sure I believe you. You four are secretly meeting, so you have to be concocting something.”

Felicity could almost hear the narrowing of his eyes in his voice. She chuckled, shaking her head, and said, “Paranoid, much?”

“I am going to find out what you are doing there.”

Lyla nodded towards the door and Felicity frowned, meaningfully looking at the towel that covered the pregnancy tests. Lyla took in a deep breath, shooting a glance at the alarm that showed it was still three and a half minutes to go. Then she shook her head.

“Are you sure?” Felicity mouthed. Lyla nodded and pointed towards the door, wordlessly telling her friend that she was going ahead.

“Are you still there?” Oliver asked.

“Uhm… yes of course,” Felicity replied, “but I am going to hang up now because we are on our way to the lair.”

“Where you will tell me what you have been doing?”

“No.” Felicity chuckled. “That will have to wait a little longer.”

Oliver grumbled something before he said his goodbye and ended the call. Felicity smiled, hanging up. Maybe she would let him seduce her into telling him what they had been doing. Oliver was very good at tickling out information of her. He was very, very good at that actually and since they-

“Felicity, you’re coming?” Thea called from the door, interrupting Felicity’s fantasies.

She quickly shook her head and got up. Standing at the door she looked back once more. Still three minutes to go for the alarm. They probably couldn’t wait that long and she couldn’t just take Lyla’s pregnancy test with her. As much as Felicity wanted to know if Lyla was pregnant and as much as she wanted Lyla to know if she was pregnant to get rid of the painful uncertainty, it was Lyla’s decision to make. If she didn’t want to take the test with them to the lair, Felicity couldn’t object to that though her fingertip almost tickled with the need to take the test with her.

“Felicity?!”

“Coming!” Felicity replied.

“I don’t want to hear you call something like that out loud when you’re talking to my brother, even if it’s only over the phone,” Thea called back, making Felicity roll her eyes before she left Lyla’s home and followed her friends outside.

 

“The signal is coming from a backroom of the club. According to the construction plan I found on the server of the architect it is supposed to be a part of the office. The SCPD took photos of said office when they investigated a burglary there last year. Anyway, I took a look at the photos, and if I am not mistaken which we know I barely ever am, then I’d say that there is a part of what is said to be the office that is separated, so there should be another room probably without windows or anything. Maybe it even leads downstairs into a basement,” Felicity said before she took a meaningful look around the foundry and added, “I have heard basements are great places to plan secret operations.”

On her way to the foundry Felicity had already started digging into the lives of these three criminals that had escaped the police. It hadn’t taken her long to find a cousin of one of these who owned a club where drugs were sold for the Italian mafia. Since it seemed to be the only link to criminal activity that these three had except for their own crimes, she had just decided to follow that lead and dig a little deeper. A few hacks into some cameras around the area of the club and the locating of said cousin’s phone had been enough to prove her theory.

“Any idea what way looks like the smartest to get in?” John asked with whispered voice.

“Of course I do,” Felicity replied. “It almost hurts me a little that you feel the need to ask.”

“I wouldn’t have asked,” Oliver said.

“Awww, isn’t he the sweetest?” Felicity asked. “I suggest three of you take the window over the small addition. The private lounges there are closed because of a water lack, not that anyone would be there at this time of the day anyway, and from the footage of the security cameras on the parking lots it looks like the window is opened. You just have to get downstairs and try to find an entrance through the stock room. I am sure they have more than one entrance and exit in case the police ever discovers what they are doing there and need to get out quickly. I mean… we have two entrances here too though that might be much more because it’s not easy to sneak people in costumes out easily if it’s not Halloween. I am getting off the track, though. So while three of you take the window the other three of you should take the back entrance. I will open the door for you. The security system of the club is crap, so that is the purest cakewalk. It’s really like they are asking for people to burgle.”

“See? I had no doubt you’d be able to do it,” Oliver said. “You are an expert in secrets after all, aren’t you?”

Felicity rolled her eyes, knowing exactly that he was still referring to the meeting with her friends of before. When she had arrived at the lair, he had just looked at her with perked up eyebrows, wordlessly demanding an explanation why she couldn’t tell him that she was meeting her friends. She had only pecked his lips and smiled at him innocently, though. If they hadn’t been forced to head out, he would have probably said something. Instead they seemed to have this talk over the comms now with everyone listening which was not exactly something Felicity was up to.

“Trouble in paradise?” Roy asked confusedly.

“No, not at all,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “Oliver is just exaggerating.”

“I wouldn’t call it exaggerating,” Oliver objected, his voice leaving no doubt that he was just teasing and they weren’t actually fighting.

“Yeah, I call it that nonetheless. By the way, I’d be grateful if you could concentrate on the task at hand because three highly dangerous criminals meeting with other criminals is something that I think demands your full attention. I’d kind of like to get you back in one piece and not… loose an arm or anything.”

“I’m multitasking.”

Felicity smiled, remembering the first time he had told her that when she had directed him through the city for a high speed chase, while they had talked about where their first date should take place. Their first date, Felicity thought with a quiet sigh. Almost eight years had passed since that now. It was kind of weird.

She watched the six colorful dots that signaled the location of Oliver and the rest of the team including Lyla separate into two groups. While Oliver, Roy and Lyla headed towards the back entrance, Thea, Laurel and John made their way towards the small addition to the club. Quickly Felicity started working herself into the security system of the club to open the backdoor for the team.

“So when are you going to tell me what you are keeping secret from me?”

Felicity sighed. “Can you please just let it go for now?”

“No.”

“Of course not,” she mumbled to herself, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. “Guys, I need to close the line for a second to talk to my husband.”

“Oh, so you are going to tell me?” Oliver asked while Felicity was closing the lines to the others until only his was opened for her.

“Not yet,” Felicity told him. “I am just asking you once more to let it go for the moment.”

There was a moment of quiet. Felicity had no doubt that Oliver had heard in her voice that she was serious about this. She really needed him to stop because as much fun teasing each other was, it wasn’t really easy doing that when everyone else was listening and it wasn’t really her secret to tell.

“Do I have to worry about you?” he asked.

Felicity smiled. “No, you don’t. I promise you don’t have to worry. I just want you to focus on this mission and I am going to tell you everything when we’re back home and alone, okay?”

“Okay,” Oliver replied without hesitation.

“Thank you.” Felicity sighed with relief before she opened the other lines again. “Okay, I opened the backdoor.”

“We’re already in and heading downstairs,” John whispered. “The club looks empty.”

“Well, it’s not exactly party hour is it?” Roy replied.

Felicity shot a look at her watch and for the first time today she wondered what the team looked like in their suits in the blazing sun. It wasn’t the first time that they headed out in the middle of the day. They city trusted the team and the times that the police had been trying to hunt them down were long gone. Luckily, Felicity should add given that she doubted it would be as easy to have a family and protect the city like this if it was different.

“I think under different circumstances I would really like this club,” Roy added. “It’s not as cool as Verdant, but I guess partying here could be a lot of fun.”

“Well, we are not here to party,” Oliver replied, “and Felicity is right. We should concentrate now.”

Following Oliver’s order, the next minutes everyone focused on the task at hand. While John, Thea and Laurel found the other entrance to the hidden room, Oliver, Lyla and Roy made their way inside from the other side. They entered the room at the same time, probably surprising the three criminals and the people that were trying to help them to escape. It didn’t keep them from fighting the team, though.

With held breath Felicity listened to the fight going on. It was the part she hated about her work in the team. She liked to see what was going on to make sure her family and friends were all okay, but the room had no cameras that would allow her to watch. There wasn’t even a webcam she could hack. She hated that. If she could watch, at least she knew what was going on.

She sent a message to the police, giving them the location where they would find the elusive criminals. That way she was busy and the team could head back soon. The sooner they were back home safe the better for all of them.

When the fight got more heated, Felicity massaged the side of her neck, nervously waiting for one of them to tell her that the situation was back under control. There were loud noises she couldn’t exactly interpret before suddenly everything was quiet.

“Everyone alright?” she asked, wondering why she was so panicked today.

She was always kind of nervous because she remembered very well the many times she had had to patch up Oliver or someone else after they had gotten hurt, but today it was more than that. Felicity shook her head. It was probably just because she was sure that Lyla was pregnant. Maybe she shouldn’t have headed out with them. If anything happened to the baby… The thought made Felicity’s stomach drop. Lyla and John had waited for this so long.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked when there was no answer, her fingers already typing away on the keyboard to check if the lines had been disconnected or something.

“Everything’s alright,” the all-clear came a second later. “John’s hurt, but-“

“I’m alright,” John assured. “It’s just a scratch.”

“That looks like much more than just a scratch,” Lyla replied.

“Should I get an ambulance somewhere close?” Felicity asked, already preparing to report an accident with a hurt person.

“No, that’s not going to be necessary,” John responded. “I just wasn’t prepared for a punch and my face crashed against the wall. It’s not that bad, just looks bad.”

“Are you sure?”

“You should really let a doctor take a look at that, John,” Laurel told him. “You might have a concussion or even something worse.”

“It’s not that bad,” John just replied once more.

“Let’s head back and we can take you to the hospital then,” Lyla suggested and Felicity could hear in John’s sigh that he had to admit defeat.

“Felicity, did you call the police?” Thea asked.

“Already done.”

“Great,” Oliver said. “Then let’s head back. Laurel, Roy, you-”

“-stay here until the police took them back to prison,” Roy replied. “Alright.”

“Let’s take position on the roof of the other building,” Laurel suggested. “The motorcycle are there anyway, so we should be able to get away quickly after the police is gone.”

Felicity watched over the security cameras outside of the hidden room how the team made its way outside. While Laurel and Roy headed towards the small building next to the club, an uninhabited house, from where they could watch the police without anyone realizing, the others made their way to the van.

“The police is only three streets away, so you should kind of hurry and maybe make sure not to be seen,” Felicity suggested. “We don’t want to challenge our luck with the good relationship we have to the police, do we?”

“They are coming from the Seventh?” Oliver asked.

“Yep.”

“Then we are leaving to the other side,” he explained, “and when we’re back home, we have things to do.”

“Oh, I know,” Felicity said with a smirk. “I remember promising you that we will test how my new lipstick looks when-“

“Don’t you dare finishing that sentence!” Roy hissed, reminding her that she hadn’t shut the other lines.

“Ugh!” Thea made at the same time. “Gross, guys!”

“Yeah… if that fight didn’t knock me out, this might actually have the power to,” John said. “Really, Felicity?”

She felt heat rising into her cheeks. She had completely forgotten that she hadn’t closed the other lines. She forgot that so often. It just took three keys on her keyboard to shut them, yet she seemed to be unable to press those when really needed, especially right before she was going to say something about sex.

“Uhm… to be fair, Oliver started this,” Felicity replied ruefully.

“No, actually I was talking about you telling me about the secret,” Oliver told her and everyone else. “You were the one who made it about sex.”

“Oh, shut up! You didn’t.”

Oliver chuckled. “And she says I am the one only thinking about sex.”

“Yeah, could we please let that subject rest?” Thea asked. “There are things I don’t want to think about. This is one of those.”

“I will… just… close the lines…”

“Probably for the better,” Laurel replied with a chuckle.

Felicity closed the lines quickly, mumbling to herself, “So how exactly do I get the ground to literally open and swallow me up before the team comes back?”

 

“Thanks for the update,” Oliver replied with a sigh of relief. “Now head home and relax, so you get better soon.”

“I will,” John assured. “Laurel just called Lyla, but once the two get off the phone, we will head home.”

“Good. If there is anything you need, just call us.”

“Thanks. Bye, Oliver.”

“Bye,” Oliver replied and ended the call.

He put his phone to the kitchen counter and turned around to look at Felicity, who was talking to her mother on the phone. When their gazes met, she rolled her eyes and shook her head. Oliver chuckled, knowing that she just couldn’t get her mother to stop talking when really all Felicity had wanted was telling her that they were available again now.

When she reached her hand out for him, Oliver took it with a smile and let her pull him closer. She turned her back towards him, leaning back against his chest and put his hand to her shoulder. He knew his wife well enough to know exactly what she wanted. Kissing the crown of her head, he started applying gentle pressure to massage the tight knots out of her shoulders and neck.

Oliver could hear Donna talking more and more even if he had no idea what she was talking about. Felicity was just mumbling a few words every now and then, reducing her part of the conversation to some agreeing hums that made her mother know that she was still listening. Oliver doubted that she was actually listening, though. When he leaned forward a little, he could see that her eyes were closed and her hums were starting to sound sleepy. It made him smile even more.

“Alright,” Felicity said after awhile. “Thanks, Mom.”

His fingers dug a little deeper into Felicity’s shoulder, eliciting a low moan from her. He knew exactly where her work left these tight knots and where she needed him to apply pressure to lose some of the tension in her shoulders. She lifted her free hand and squeezed his fingers before turning her head to kiss the palm of his hand. Oliver smiled contently, watching her doing so.

“Huh?” Felicity said into the phone with a frown, letting go of his hand. When she leaned her head back to look at him, Oliver perked up his eyebrows in question. At the same time Felicity lifted her hand and slapped his chest ungently. “He told you that, yeah?”

“I told her what?” Oliver asked in a whisper, cocking his head, while he was rubbing his hand over his chest where she had hit him. He would have to make Felicity kiss it better later.

Felicity kept her gaze focused on him when she was replying to Donna, “Yeah, we will go back to that now then. Just drop the kids after you had your ice cream. Thanks, Mom.”

She ended the call and put the phone to the table before she boxed Oliver’s shoulder, making him frown. Again he rubbed his fingers over where she had hit him, looking at her without understanding.

“Why do you keep hitting me?” he asked her with played hurt in his voice.

“Did you tell my mother that she had to take the kids today because we are having sex?”

“I…” Oliver puckered his lips for a moment, giving her what he hoped was an innocent look. “I just told her that there was a really important emergency and I really needed to be alone with you. It’s not my fault she made this about sex though I probably should have known better. Like mother, like daughter.”

Felicity clenched her hand to a fist to punch him once more. Before her fist could meet his chest, he grabbed her hand and pulled her from the bar stood and against him instead, so her back was pressed to his chest. He put both of his arms around her to cage her in and keep her from moving. He lowered his lips to her ear, brushing them against her lobe before wrapping his lips around the soft skin there and tug at her lobe gently. Felicity sighed in response and her head dropped back against his shoulder which gave him the opportunity to slide his lips up and down the side of her neck.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked with a content sigh, making herself comfortable in his arms.

“Well, I don’t want to lie to your mom, so I guess we have to have sex,” Oliver whispered against the soft spot right under her ear. He pressed his lips to her skin there while pushing his nose against her throat to breathe her in. “I’m being logical. You like that, right?”

Felicity chuckled, her chest vibrating against his in the way he loved so much. She turned in his arms and pressed her chest against his. Smiling at him brightly in the way she only smiled at him, she straightened up onto her toes and kissed him gently.

“I love when you’re being logical,” she whispered against his lips before she kissed him once more. “I guess you want us to continue where we stopped this morning?”

Oliver could feel the blood rushing right between his legs. His thoughts had been drifting back to Felicity’s promise for the night every once in a while during the last hours since they had left the bed. Of course he would have eaten her out this morning without her agreement on any deal, but it was just too much fun to tease her until she gave in. It wasn’t like she didn’t know that he’d gratefully eat her out without any reward. She knew exactly that he would do that. It was why they could tease each other about things like that. Teasing each other was just how their marriage worked. It was one of the many ways for them to communicate and to keep things interesting and surprising between them.

Not that their marriage only worked if things were interesting, Oliver added to his thoughts with a smile. He remembered very well proposing a year of boredom to Felicity last August. It hadn’t happened since in the very same conversation Felicity had told him that she was pregnant which admittedly had been even better.

“Is that what you want to do?” Oliver asked Felicity, leaning down to brush his lips against hers once more. “Continue where we stopped this morning?”

Felicity smiled, pressing herself even closer to him. She put a leg around his hip to open herself to him. When she slowly rubbed her hips against his, he groaned. He could feel himself hardening instantly, the promise of her hips enough to make his desire for her increase immediately.

“Maybe,” Felicity replied in a whisper before she puckered her lips and stroked her forefinger up and down his chest slowly, “but maybe you should remind me of why exactly I agreed to do this in the first place.”

“Oh, I’d love to remind you,” Oliver replied.

He leaned down and captured her lips with his in a gentle kiss. Nuzzling her nose with his, he put his hands under her butt and lifted her into his arms easily. Felicity’s legs closed around his hips, while her arms wrapped around his neck at the same time. Their lips met in another slow and unhurried kiss.

“Bedroom,” Felicity demanded, already starting to tug at the hem of his henley to pull it over his head and off him, “now.”

“Your wish is my command,” Oliver replied, giving her butt a squeeze that made her move against him with a quiet moan.

While he was carrying her out of the bedroom, Felicity pulled his henley over his head and dropped it to the floor carelessly. She put her gentle hands to his cheeks, her fingers stroking over his stubble. He knew she loved to do that and he loved if she did this. He never felt as accepted and as worshipped as when they were together. Just when she lowered her lips to his to kiss him again, there was a beeping sound.

Felicity pushed at his shoulders, straightening up in his arms, so she could bring some distance between their lips. Oliver kissed along the side of her neck, not letting her stop him to caress whatever part of her body his lips could reach.

“That’s my phone,” Felicity told him.

“I noticed,” Oliver replied against her pulse point. “I just don’t care much.”

“I care.”

“Then just stopped,” he groaned and sucked at her tender skin.

Felicity sighed, scratching her fingernails over the skin at the back of his neck. He could feel how much she liked knowing that he was going to leave a hickey and yet he didn’t miss how she was struggling. He just knew her too well to think that she could just ignore her phone like that, so he let go of her neck, eyeing up the red mark he had left for a moment before he put his head back to look her in the eyes.

“You want to go answering your phone?”

“You want to know the secret?”

“Kind of, yeah.”

“Then you have to let me go for a second, so I can answer my phone?”

“What if I don’t want to let you go?”

“Then you won’t know about the secret.”

Oliver rolled his eyes, letting her down on the floor. He nodded his head towards the kitchen where she had left her phone. And when she started running in that direction, he slapped her butt playfully. Felicity jumped over her high heels that she had kicked off her feet when they had come home. Then she disappeared into the kitchen. Shaking his head and smiling about her slightly, Oliver followed her slowly.

When he stepped into the doorframe to the kitchen, leaning against the wood and crossing his arms in front of his naked chest, Felicity was already on her phone. She talked with almost whispered voice, her back turned towards him. Oliver didn’t mind much since the view allowed him to look at her butt.

“That’s great news,” she whispered.

Oliver puckered his lips, trying to figure out what could be going on. What could be great news that the ladies had wanted to share with each other before letting anyone else know? He didn’t think Roy or John had known about their girlfriend and wives meeting. If he didn’t knew better, he’d think they had invited a stripper to have some fun.

“Oh my god!” Felicity almost called out before she slapped her hand in front of her lips.

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. Whatever was going on there had to be something really, really good. If Felicity liked it, he was sure he would like it, too.

“No, no, absolutely,” Felicity continued. “I am going to be there in like ten minutes.”

Oliver frowned. Okay, maybe he wouldn’t like it that much because if Felicity had to head out that meant that there would be no time to continue where they had stopped this morning, at least not yet. On the other hand he was sure that he could make Felicity feel sorry for little Oliver at least a little having to wait so long. That could only end well for him, so…

“Yes… Yes, I’ll do that,” Felicity promised in a whisper. “Give me ten minutes. I’ll hurry. Bye.”

The moment she ended the call, she already turned around to him with an excited smile. Oliver cocked his head, perking up his eyebrows. Whatever she had been keeping secret from him earlier today was definitely something she wanted to share with him now. He could see the excitement on her face. She was so eager to share whatever secret she had kept from him so far.

Felicity approached him quickly and put her hands to his forearm, smiling at him brightly. “Ready to hear the secret?”

“Sure,” Oliver replied, his smile matching hers.

“Laurel, Thea, Lyla and I have had a pregnancy test party this morning.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Lyla’s pregnant?”

Felicity nodded, squealing with excitement and hopping up and down slightly. “She is. That’s not all, though. We didn’t see the results of the tests before we headed out. When Laurel came home, she checked and saw the result was pregnant, so she called Lyla immediately. Then she took the other tests and just trashed them. When she wanted to trash something more, her gaze fell onto the pregnancy tests and she figured there are two positive tests.”

Oliver’s eyebrows rose even more in response. “So…?”

“Thea is pregnant,” Felicity explained, nodding her head. “She already told us that… you probably don’t want to hear that.”

Oliver chuckled quite uncomfortably. “If it’s about my baby sister having sex, I probably don’t.”

Felicity smiled gently, putting her hands to his cheeks. She kissed him gently and explained, “Thea wants to make sure it’s not just wrong alarm because she read that some tests are useless after some time. Laurel read that the tests we bought show the correct results for at least four days, so it shouldn’t be wrong alarm, but it’s Thea’s first pregnancy, so she has every right to be nervous and freak out slightly. She’s just really excited and since she has been there for me when I have first thought I was pregnant-“

“-you need to be there for her now,” Oliver finished her sentence, nodding her head. “I am happy she wants you to be around for this.”

“Well, your wife and your baby sister are getting along well,” Felicity told him before she pecked his lips shortly and framed his face with her hands. “Are you going to be okay?”

Oliver smiled. She knew him so well, better than anyone else really. She didn’t miss that the thought of his baby sister being pregnant did things to him. He didn’t even know how to describe it. He was happy for his sister because he knew her great it was to have kids and how what an exciting time was ahead of her with experiencing all of this for the first time. He just realized how much time had passed and how quickly it had passed.

“I might need a lot of comfort tonight,” Oliver replied, moving his arms around Felicity’s waist to pull her close against him, “because my baby sister is having a baby and that feels like I am losing a little bit of her though I am really happy for her. Does that make sense?”

Felicity smiled and kissed him. “Absolutely. I will be back soon and comfort you all night if you want to.”

“I would like that.” Oliver smiled brightly and kissed her once more before he nodded towards the door. “And now go. We don’t want Thea to wait too long.”

Felicity smiled and kissed his cheek before she put her shoes back on, took her purse and hurried outside. Oliver watched after her, smiling softly. His baby sister was having a baby. That baby would grow up without any grandparents, so he would make sure that this baby was going to have a great uncle like he already knew the baby would have a great aunt as well as amazing cousins that would make up for the lack of other family members. And of course he’d be here for his sister if she struggled with the task of becoming a mom because he remembered very well that he had had struggled a little when he had become a dad for the first time, well, for the first time he had known since he hadn’t know about William before he had had two more children.

Anyway, Oliver wouldn’t say he was an expert but with four kids he was sure that he had enough experience to give his little sister advice if needed. At least he hoped so.

 

“Mommy’s coming home!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly and jumped down from the kitchen counter to run to the door and welcome her mommy already.

“Mommy’s home!” Tommy repeated after his older sister and followed her immediately.

Oliver chuckled, putting the last pieces of kiwis to the fruit plate, and went over to the sink to wash his hands. When Millie released an unhappy sound, he turned his head back over his shoulder to watch his youngest child rejecting the spoon of banana puree her oldest brother offered her. Millie had been a little whiney all day. At the age of 23 weeks she had started teething now which was why she wasn’t that much of a sunshine every once in awhile now.

“Come on, Millie, it’s just a few more spoons,” William tried to encourage his little sister, but she kept turning her head away when he offered her the puree.

“I’m just happy she ate anything at all,” Oliver said with a sigh. “It’s a good thing Felicity is back home. She is probably going to be able to get her to eat a little bit more.”

“She’s a mommy’s girl?” William asked, putting the spoon into the bowl with puree and pushing it a little bit away from them.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “She has her tendencies occasionally, but I think Felicity and I are much more even in her eyes than we were in Emmy’s and Tommy’s when they were younger. They really had their favorite parent though… I mean we always made jokes about that, but the truth is that Emmy and Tommy have always loved both of us pretty much.”

“That sounds nice,” William said with a smile before he turned back to his little sister. “Come on, Millie, we are going to say hi to your mommy.”

William lifted his little sister out of the high chair and into his arms. The little girl smiled at him in a way that warmed Oliver’s heart. William was a great addition to this family and he was great with his little siblings. The boy seemed to have developed a particular lovely relationship with the youngest Queen Baby since unlike with his other two siblings he had known her from the very beginning. Oliver loved watching all four children interacting with each other. After all the trouble they had had, first with William’s introduction and then with Tommy’s trouble with Millie it was-

“Dad?” William’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

“Hm?” Oliver made, perking up his eyebrows at William, who was standing in the door with Millie sitting on his hip.

When he caught his son’s worried gaze, Oliver frowned. He was about to ask what was wrong when William turned his head back to look at what had called his attention outside of the kitchen. Oliver threw the kitchen towel to the counter and approached his son, following William’s gaze towards the front door.

His frown deepened even more at what he saw. Felicity was crouching down on the floor, embraced in a tight hug with Tommy and Emmy. She had her face hidden against the side of Tommy’s neck, but Oliver could see in the way her chest was heaving that she was crying. He felt his worry increasing. Something was wrong.

“Mama, no cry,” Tommy told her, stroking his hand over his mother’s blonde hair.

Felicity just took in a sniffling breath, but she didn’t reply. It only made Oliver worry more. Something had definitely gone wrong and he could only guess what it was.

“Hey, Emmy, Tommy, how about you go to the living room with William and Millie? You could play a little together,” he suggested, shortly turning his head to seek William’s approval and he nodded quickly. “Daddy’s going to follow soon and bring you the fruits, alright?”

“But mommy’s crying,” Emmy told him.

“I know,” Oliver replied. “Daddy will take care of mommy, okay?”

Emmy hesitated for a moment before she nodded. She took Tommy’s hand and pulled him with her into the living room. William shot his father a look before he followed his siblings, bouncing Millie up and down on his hip in the meantime. Oliver strode towards Felicity in the meantime, taking her hands to pull her to her feet and into his arms. She leaned against him without any restraint, actively pressing herself closer to him and wrapping her arms around his waist tightly. Her hands clawed to fists in his henley, keeping him close.

For a long moment Oliver just held her, letting her cry in his arms. He could feel her tears against his neck and listened to her sobs that were muffled by his henley. He stroked his hands up and down her back comfortingly, not saying a word. It took a long time until her sobs finally ceased and her breaths became deeper again.

Oliver ducked his head to look at Felicity. Her head leaned against his shoulder, her eyes squeezed shut. She took deep breaths, in through her nose and out through her lips, to calm herself down. She looked everything but calm, but at least she didn’t seem as churning as before.

“What happened?” Oliver asked in a whisper.

Felicity’s arms tightened around his waist so much that his ribs hurt. He didn’t complain, though. Instead he just kissed the crown of Felicity’s head and held her even more tightly against him, too.

“Did someone hurt you?” he whispered when she didn’t reply, the thought making his stomach drop.

Felicity leaned her head back quickly, shaking her head.

“No,” she assured him. “No, it’s not… it’s not something like that.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered. He lifted a hand to her face and gently wiped away the tears from her cheeks, drying the wetness they had left there. Felicity leaned into Oliver’s touch with a sigh, closing her eyes. Frowning worriedly, he leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “Will you tell me what’s going on please?”

Felicity opened her eyes with a sigh, another tear escaping the corner of her eye. While she was pressing herself impossibly close to him, he wiped the tear away with his thumb and brushed his lips against the corner of her mouth.

“Thea’s not pregnant,” she finally said.

“Oh,” Oliver made.

He felt slight disappointment spreading in himself. This last hour that Felicity had been away he had grown weirdly fond of the idea to help his baby sister with her first baby. Of course he hadn’t known if she really needed help because Thea was great and she had experience with little kids given how often she babysat for them, but it was always different when they were your kids.

Smiling at Felicity comfortingly, he stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones and asked, “Was she very disappointed?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “A little.”

“Well, there is still time for her to have a baby,” Oliver explained. He knew how close Felicity and Thea were. Of course Felicity felt with his little sister when she was disappointed. “There is no reason for you to cry over this. Thea is disappointed now, but-“

“That’s… that’s not…” Felicity shook her head. “There’s more.”

Oliver nodded, waiting for her to explain it. She loosened one hand from his henley to put her fingers around his wrist instead. She took in a deep breath.

“Thea’s not pregnant, but the second positive pregnancy test Laurel found wasn’t wrong.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Laurel is pregnant? I didn’t even know she was dating anyone. Well, in case the father is not available, she has a lot of friends. We can all help her because the truth is that neither of us is ever really alone and-“

When Felicity sighed, cocking her head and giving him a look, Oliver stopped. He frowned at her, watching her face closely.

“It’s not Laurel who’s pregnant,” he stated, reading the words right out of the expression on her face. He frowned. “But if it’s not Thea and not Laurel and Lyla is already pregnant, who-“

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, looking at him urgently. His eyes widened, eying up her face carefully. If it wasn’t Laurel or Thea and Lyla was already out of the game, there really was just one woman left to be pregnant.

“You… you’re pregnant?”

Felicity nodded, releasing a somewhat sad chuckle. “The minipill has a pearl index of like 0.1 when taken properly which means that there is like one in a thousand women that gets pregnant despite taking the minipill. And we’re the lucky ones.”

Oliver opened his mouth a few times, unsure what exactly to say to that. He was still processing this news. It had taken him and Felicity months to bring themselves to agree on having another baby, too scared by the pregnancy depression Felicity had suffered through during her pregnancy with Tommy. After Millie they had agreed that their family was perfect and their family planning was finished. Another baby had never really been the plan and…

“But… you’re breastfeeding,” Oliver said lamely. His thoughts were spinning. “Shouldn’t that be an additional protection?”

“It’s only a protection when the baby is breastfed every… I don’t know… six hours or something, but Millie is sleeping through the night and…” Felicity shrugged her shoulders.

Oliver nodded slowly. “That explains the different taste at least.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Huh?”

“Uhm… this morning when I was… you know… I got the impression that your taste was different, but I couldn’t really… I didn’t know what exactly it was, but… yeah, that explains that and-“

“Oliver,” she interrupted him before he could talk himself into a babble because if you were married to a babbling genius, that was kind of rubbing up on you, the babbling more than the genius, though. “I’m pregnant.”

Hearing these words again, they finally sank in. Felicity was pregnant. They were having another baby. He smiled at Felicity, but when he saw the tears springing to her eyes once more, he pulled her close against him again. He stroked his hand over her hair, leaning his cheek against her temple. When a sob escaped her lips, he tightened his arms around her and frowned slightly.

“Is Thea mad at you?” he asked. “Because you’re pregnant and she isn’t?”

He doubted that Thea was, but Felicity had also been worried that Lyla had been angry with her when she had been pregnant with Millie. Back then Lyla and John had still been actively trying for a baby. Even after months it hadn’t worked, while Oliver and Felicity had started trying and it had only taken them a few weeks. Maybe Felicity had the same worries now.

She shook her head, though. “No.”

Oliver took in a deep breath before he voiced the only other conclusion he could find for why she was crying. “So you don’t want another baby?”

“No… I mean yes. I’m…” Felicity leaned her head back to look at him before she straightened up on her toes and captured his lips in a gentle kiss. “I’m… happy. This is all… unexpected. We kind of finished our family planning with Millie’s birth and… and this was never planned and then Millie is still so young and it’s going to be so… I don’t know… It’s a lot to take in, but I’m… happy. I think.”

“I know this is unexpected,” Oliver replied and when Felicity gave him a look, he chuckled. “It’s really unexpected, but we have so much love to give and one baby more is not going to break our backs. We can do this like we have done so much more already. Besides, remember when you called me to tell me you were pregnant with Millie? Back then I was going to suggest a year of boredom before trying for baby. Well, this is a year later, so all of this does go according to plan, doesn’t it? It was just wasn’t necessarily the plan we agreed on. Like I said before all that matters is that we can do this, though. And all we need for that is love.”

“I told Thea the same thing when she had a moment of worry.”

Oliver nodded slowly, waiting for Felicity to say anything more, but she stayed silent. Instead there was just another tear running down her cheek. With a gentle swipe of his thumb he wiped it away.

“If you’re happy,” he started slowly, pulling her back into his arms until her head rested against his shoulder, “then why are you crying?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, sniffling, before she sobbed out, “I don’t know.”

Oliver smiled sympathetically, tightening his hold on her and kissing her temple. “Is there anything I can say or do to make it better right now?”

Felicity sniffled. “I am not really sad, so I don’t need it to get better. I just… I just can’t stop crying and I don’t know why.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered and kissed her temple. “I am just going to hold you, okay?”

Felicity nodded, pressing her nose against his neck and breathing him in. Then she kissed his pulse point gently and snuggled even closer to him. Oliver felt a comfortable shiver running down the length of his spine. Sometimes it still amazed him how perfectly his and Felicity’s body fit together. It was like they were made for each other.

She sighed contently. “You just holding me? That would be perfect.”

Yes, Oliver thought, that was really the only right word to describe this situation as well as their entire life really. It was truly perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE!!! XD
> 
> If you want to get a little spoiled of what will happen in the next 50 chapters, you can find the blacked out chapter notes [here](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/157739563700/time-for-a-story-spoiler-alarm).


	201. It takes time

The first thing Felicity noticed, when she opened the door that led from the back of the club into the foundry, was the rhythmic _clang-clang-clang_ that told her that Oliver was probably training on the salmon ladder. As quietly as possible she tiptoed down towards the middle of the metal stairs and took a long look in the direction of the salmon ladder. It was enough to confirm her suspicion. Resting her forearms on the banister, she just watched him. He had taken his shirt off, only wearing jeans and his shoes. His eyes were squeezed shut, causing a frown on his forehead.

When he reached the top of the salmon ladder, he jumped back down with the bar in his hands. He opened his eyes, looking right at her. Without any stumble in the flow of his movements he started climbing the salmon ladder all over again, asking her, “Enjoying the view?”

Felicity’s smile widened as she looked up and down Oliver’s body. Small drops of sweat were rolling down his breast and abs, accentuating the strong muscles of his chest even more.

“Kind of,” she admitted eventually. “You can’t really blame me.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Oliver replied. When he reached the top of the salmon ladder the next time, he let go of the bar before he let himself drop back onto his feet. “I enjoy having you here to watch me as much as you enjoying actually watching me.”

She just smiled in response, continuing her way down the metal stairs while Oliver was approaching her at the same time. They met in front of the med table, Oliver’s arms sliding around her waist instantly and Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes, putting a hand to his shoulder to give her leverage while keeping some distance given the sweat on his chest. Their lips met in a chaste but gentle kiss. His lips were salty from the sweat, but Felicity didn’t mind. It harmonized perfectly with the taste that was all his own.

When their lips parted, Felicity stayed straightened up onto her toes for a moment longer, nuzzling his nose with hers. Only then did she lower herself with a sigh, smiling slightly at Oliver, whose entire face was brightened up with a wide smile.

“How was work?” he asked eventually, taking her hand and lacing his fingers through hers.

“Boring,” Felicity admitted, shrugging her shoulders, “a lot of paper work actually. I get to visit the first patient that got the biochip tomorrow in physiotherapy, though, so all the paperwork is definitely worth it. Where are the kids?”

“Thea took them,” Oliver replied. “She just wanted to spend the day with them, having fun. She said we owed her.”

Felicity nodded slowly, lowering her gaze to the floor and not saying a word. It had only been a week since Thea had thought that she was pregnant after the pregnancy test party for Lyla had ended with two positive tests. Unfortunately, a second pregnancy test party had proved that hope wrong since it hadn’t been Thea who had been pregnant but Felicity.

“Hey,” Oliver said, gently squeezing her fingers until she looked at him again. “Thea’s not mad at you because it turned out that you’re the one being pregnant. She really isn’t. She was just trying to tease.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered. She took in a deep breath before releasing the air with a sigh. “It’s just weird because for that forty minutes or whatever that I thought Thea was the one being pregnant, I imagined so many things we could all do together. I thought our kids would have a cousin and… and I was so happy for Thea and Roy because having your first baby is such an exciting journey and it just feels like I took that from her.”

Oliver shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You didn’t take anything from her.”

Felicity sighed once more. She looked at Oliver for a long moment, letting the certainty in his eyes convince her. When she smiled at him, Oliver put a hand to her cheek and kissed her gently once more.

“Did you make an appointment with Dr. Hampton?”

“He’s on vacation,” Felicity explained with a sigh. “I talked to his substitution Dr. Nixon, though, and he said that we could wait with the first appointment a few weeks anyway, so I set it for the beginning of October in two weeks when Dr. Hampton is back. He said we should just call and antedate the appointment if there are any problems which hopefully there won’t be.”

Oliver nodded. “Do we need to take care of anything particular because of the little time between the two pregnancies?”

“He said it might be necessary to wean Millie because the milk might dry up at some point during the pregnancy and I also have a history of losing weight during the pregnancy like it happened when I was pregnant with Tommy and the double burden of being pregnant and nursing a baby…”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. She wasn’t exactly looking forward to weaning Millie just yet. For her breastfeeding always was an opportunity to bond with her youngest like it had been an opportunity to  bond with Emmy and Tommy before. She didn’t get to breastfeed often since she was working and expressing most of the milk for the day anyway, but whenever she got the chance, she breastfed Millie. When Emmy had been a baby, Oliver had bought bottles with these rubber nipples that were similar to a woman’s breast, so the baby wouldn’t get confused with the different techniques of sucking. He had read that could happen and immediately made sure to solve the problem before it could occur.

“We will get the milk powder when we are heading back home,” Oliver suggested.

“Yeah, that’s probably for the best.”

Felicity sighed, lowering her gaze to the floor once more. She really didn’t want to get the milk powder and wean Millie. While she didn’t blame any woman who didn’t breastfeed her children, she felt kind of guilty for not being able to breastfeed her own daughter. Emmy and Tommy had both been nursed for longer than just four months. She had wanted to give the same to Millie.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied quickly, smiling at Oliver. When he just cocked his head, giving her a look of doubt, she sighed and gestured with her hand around her head. “Just… things going on in here. I am still getting used to the idea of having another baby and all the change that is coming our way now.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He put a hand to her cheek and Felicity snuggled her face into his touch, closing her eyes for a moment. She had had a week to get used to the idea of being pregnant again, but for some reason it was taking her longer, at least kind of.

“I know it’s a lot,” Oliver whispered.

Felicity smiled, nodding her head with a sigh. “I read that having two babies close together often leads to premature births and low birth weight and-“

“Hey,” Oliver interrupted her, squeezing her hand to make her stop. He shook his head. “Don’t think like that. How were the chances I was going to survive the Gambit or challenging Ra’s or everything else that happened? Yet here we are.”

“Yeah, here we are,” Felicity whispered. She took in a deep breath, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment before she shook her head and chuckled. “I am sorry. I really don’t mean to sound so negative. It’s just-“

“You are worried,” Oliver stated. “That’s okay. I don’t want you to worry, but I understand if you do. We just… we just need time to get used to this, right?”

“Right.” Felicity smiled and straightened up to peck his lips shortly. “I am going to install a few updates on the system now.”

“I’ll go back to the salmon ladder.”

“I am probably going to watch you every once in awhile.”

“I am going to give it extra effort then,” Oliver replied and kissed her once more before he turned around and walked back to the salmon ladder.

Felicity smiled after him for a moment before she headed to her work station. She put her purse to the table and switched on the computer system. She got herself a mug of tea before she sat down behind the computers, shot a last look in Oliver’s direction to enjoy the play of his muscles once more and finally dived into her work. It didn’t take her long to get completely lost in it, forgetting all the worries about what might or might not happen to their unborn baby.

The last week hadn’t been exactly easy for her. Felicity was still getting used to the idea of having another baby, especially so soon after Millie’s birth. She had hoped that maybe doing some research would help and she had indeed found some interesting reports about mothers saying that having two children so close together had a lot of advantages because the children always had someone to play with. Felicity hadn’t missed that a lot of doctors and midwives warned of two close pregnancies as it caused a lot of stress to the mother and the unborn child as well as the young baby.

The truth was that there were positive and negative sides to this as there were positive and negative sides to basically everything else in life, too. She would get used to this surprise and then she would focus on all the positive things it would bring to their lives. The baby might be unplanned and unexpected, but he or she would be a great addition to their family. Felicity was sure of that.

She worked on the updates for almost two hours straight, just taking short breaks every once in awhile when the update forced her to rest. She leaned back in her chair and watched Oliver then. Watching him on the salmon ladder kind of had a calming and grounding effect on her. It had always been that way and probably always would be.

Almost two hours had passed when Felicity felt Oliver’s lips pressing to the crown of her head. She flinched slightly since she hadn’t heard him approaching. She turned around to him with wide eyes, but he only chuckled amusedly.

“I have been talking to you for almost half a minute,” he told her.

“Oh,” Felicity made, frowning. “I was kind of in my computer-bubble.”

Oliver chuckled. “How about you go back into your computer-bubble for another ten minutes while I am taking a shower and then I am taking you out to dinner?”

Felicity puckered her lips for a moment. “Counterproposal, you are not taking me out to dinner. Instead we are calling Thea to tell her that was are picking the kids back up and get take-away on the way home. Then we make ourselves comfortable in front of the TV, watching a movie together and enjoying the food.”

“Whatever you want,” Oliver replied. He leaned down and kissed her gently. “I am heading under the shower.”

“I’ll be waiting here,” Felicity told him and pecked his lips once more.

She watched him strolling towards the back of the lair where the changing room and shower was. Usually she’d join him in the shower, ignoring the rules they had set up for all the couples down here. She and Oliver had broken the no-sex-rule uncountable times already. Thea and Roy as well as John and Lyla always insisted that they were the only one breaking that rule, but Felicity doubted that was true. Anyway, she wasn’t really feeling any want for sex today. She hadn’t felt any want for it since she had found out she was pregnant really.

“I guess I can already tell that you are very different from your sister Millie, hm?” Felicity asked, stroking her hand over her lower stomach.

When she had been pregnant with Millie she had gone into sexual overdrive. It had been so bad that Oliver hadn’t been able to keep up with her needs anymore. He had actually been forced to put to their crazy sex life for the sake of little Oliver as Felicity liked to call his penis ever since. If the last week had been any indication, this baby wasn’t going to give Felicity the same urgent need for sex all the time. She wasn’t sure if that was good or bad.

Sighing, she turned back to her screens and shut down the system to be ready when Oliver would come back from his shower. When she heard steps coming closer, she turned around, thinking it was him, but was surprised with the sight of John approaching her from the back entrance. She hadn’t seen him since last week when he had gotten hurt in the field and been told to catch a little rest.

“Hey,” Felicity said with a smile, turning in her chair to look at him. “What are you doing here? I thought you were still on bed rest?”

“Nope,” John replied with a chuckle, shaking his head. “After a full week of lying in bed and resting I really needed to get out and thought I’d step by to see if there is anything to do here.”

“City’s quiet,” Felicity told him. “And even if it wasn’t, I wouldn’t let you go out in the field.”

“It was just a little head injury.”

“Yeah, but from bed rest right into the field doesn’t sound healthy to me and I need you to be healthy because you need to be an amazing dad for Baby Sara, who really isn’t a baby anymore, and for the new baby,” Felicity told him with a wide smile and got up from her chair, spreading her arms. “I just remembered I didn’t get to congratulate you yet.”

John chuckled, stepping into her hug and wrapping his strong arms around her. For a long moment Felicity just stayed in his arms, not saying a word and just enjoying the embrace of her best friend.

“Congratulations, John,” Felicity whispered eventually. “I am so happy for Lyla and you. If anyone deserves to have everything they want, it’s the two of you.”

John kissed her temple and Felicity could feel him smile against her skin. He tightened his hold on her when he replied, “Thank you, Felicity. And I guess I can give the congratulations right back to you.”

“Yeah, I guess you can,” she said with a sigh.

John’s arms tightened around once more for a short moment before he pulled out of the hug, still holding her close, though. He frowned slightly, watching her face. “You don’t sound convinced.”

“I am just… still getting used to the idea,” Felicity explained, wondering how often she had said this sentence in the last week. “You know, Oliver and I actually agreed that with Millie our family planning was finished. We have four perfectly healthy kids and having another baby and that so soon after Millie’s birth…”

“It is soon,” John agreed, nodding his head, “but you and Oliver can do this.”

“I know,” Felicity replied with a smile that felt weirdly frozen onto her face. “Like I said I just need some time to get used to the idea.”

She didn’t miss how she sounded like a barrel organ, always repeating the same words. She felt like she hadn’t said anything else this last week. Apart from the fact that they hadn’t planned on having another baby it was also kind of weird that everyone except for the kids and her mother and Quentin already knew about the pregnancy. Felicity didn’t know how far along she was, but she was sure that the critical part of the pregnancy wasn’t over yet. Knowing that in case something went wrong and she was going to lose this baby everyone would know about her loss only added more pressure to her.

“Lyla and I are always here for you,” John assured her and kissed her forehead. “I hope you know that.”

“I do, but you two will focus on nothing else than your family for the next months, got me?”

“Well, since you are family, I am just going to repeat what I said before,” John stated, looking her in the eyes intently. “You, Felicity Smoak-“

“It’s been Queen for quite some time now,” Felicity interrupted John.

He chuckled. “You, Felicity Megan Queen nee Smoak, are part of Lyla’s and my family always and forever. If there is anything bothering you and you need a shoulder to lean on or an ear to listen to you-“

“I have my wonderful husband,” Felicity interrupted him.

John sighed. “All I am trying to say is that you can always come to us.”

“And all I am trying to say is that I want Lyla and you to concentrate on the little human being that is going to become a part of your family soon.”

“It won’t make us forget the grownup family members that might need our help, though.”

Felicity looked into John’s eyes for a long moment before she sighed, admitting defeat. They could continue like this for hours and neither of them would shift their ground. She would keep insisting that John and Lyla should concentrate on their own domestic happiness, while he would keep pushing her to promise that she’d come to him if there are any problems.

“Did Lyla already make an appointment with her doctor?”

John nodded. “Yeah, we are going to see him tomorrow.”

“Nervous?”

“Kind of,” he admitted with a chuckle, moving a hand over his head, “but I am also very excited.”

“You’re a great dad, so you really have no reason to be nervous,” Felicity told him, taking his hand and squeezing it.

“Thanks, Felicity,” John replied with a smile. “Talking of dads, where’s Oliver?”

“Right here,” Oliver replied from the other end of the foundry, approaching them quickly with a bright smile on his lips. “Good to see you back on your feet, John.”

“Well, it was time.”

Oliver crossed the distance to her work station where she and John were standing quickly. He kissed Felicity’s temple shortly before he turned to his best friend.

“Felicity already told me the great news, so congratulations,” Oliver said, hugging his friend.

“It’s only fair Felicity told you because Lyla also told me,” John replied with a chuckle. “Congratulations right back to you.”

Oliver chuckled, loosening himself from the hug and pulling Felicity close to his side. Smiling, she leaned her head against his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his waist. Oliver’s warm hand rubbed up and down her lower back gently.

“Yeah, we’ve been kind of surprised by this news.”

“Understatement,” Felicity mumbled. Oliver’s arm around her tightened and he kissed the crown of her head comfortingly. Felicity closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying having him so close. She let the warmth of his embrace comfort her before she kissed Oliver’s shoulder through his shirt and put her chin to his chest, looking at him with a soft even if slightly tired smile. “It’s a pleasant surprise, though.”

“A very pleasant surprise,” Oliver agreed, smiling at her. “All we need now is a little more time to let this surprise sink in. Right?”

Felicity smiled. “Right.”

Oliver pecked her lips once more. Felicity snuggled her cheek to his shoulder then. When her eyes met John’s, she noticed the intense expression in his eyes that seemed to be trying to get under her skin. She lowered her gaze, pressing her body closer to Oliver’s side, and he tightened his arm around her in response.

Time was going to solve everything because after all there was nothing to really fear for them. She and Oliver were in a stable and happy marriage that was built on trust, love and support. They had each other and they had great kids that would welcome this little cupcake that was growing inside of her and they also had friends and family that would support them if they needed it and the five kids were going to be too much for them.

Now Felicity just needed to shake off the feeling that something was going to go wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be on Saturday.   
> Next week I will update on Wednesday and Friday. ;)


	202. Old demons

“You look about as tired as I feel,” Oliver said with a gentle smile playing on his lips.

He moved down from the couch and sat down on the floor in front of the soft cushions instead, his legs spread slightly, so Millie was lying between his calves. He put his hands around her short legs and pulled her closer against him. When he tickled her tummy, Millie giggled in response, kicking her little legs against his lower stomach. Her happy giggles soon turned into another yawn that made Oliver chuckle.

“You are so incredibly tired,” Oliver told Millie, putting his fingers around her feet and playing with them. “That is what happens when you don’t nap when you are supposed to.”

“Ga-ga-ga,” Millie babbled her gaze like she wanted to justify her restlessness this afternoon.

“The only reason you regret this is because you are tired no.”

“Ga-ga.”

“Yeah, daddy can look right through your sweet looks,” Oliver whispered. He leaned down and kissed his baby’s soft lips. “Don’t you worry, though. Daddy’s not mad. I know that naps suck sometimes. It’s just so much cooler to spend the day being awake and having fun with daddy and your siblings, right?”

Millie smiled before she grabbed her stuffed elephant, pulled it to her mouth and closed her lips around the plastic eye of the toy. She hummed contently before she released a sleepy sigh. When her eyes closed, Oliver tickled her tummy once more.

“Now is not the time to sleep,” he told her, earning him an unhappy whine. “Yeah, I know that you want to sleep now that Emmy and Tommy are playing with each other upstairs and William is doing his homework. Daddy can’t let you sleep now, though. If you sleep now, you won’t sleep tonight and you are going to terrorize everyone else and then mommy is going to be angry with daddy for letting you sleep this early. We don’t want mommy do be angry with Oliver. We really can’t have her being mad, can we?”

“Ga-ga-ga,” Millie just babbled out before sucking at the plastic eye again.

Oliver smiled, gently stroking his fingertips against Millie’s soft cheek. “I know that’s not what you wanted to hear. You wanted to hear that you can sleep now and then mommy and daddy are going to get up in the middle of the night to play with you when you are awake again, right?”

Millie giggled like she had understood exactly what her father had just said. She rubbed her face against the plush of the elephant and sighed sleepily once more. Then she sighed and looked at him, pressing the elephant to her cheek and leaning her face against it. Just when Oliver was about to comment on how she could look at him with her big, blue eyes forever and he still wouldn’t let her go to sleep now-

“Mommy’s home!” Tommy called from the stairs excitedly.

Oliver frowned, glancing at his watch. It was just four p.m. and Felicity’s last appointment was at six. She wasn’t going to be home before seven-thirty. She had crazy working hours currently, but when had work ever not been crazy? It was probably one of the downsides of the company’s success Felicity had made possible with all the effort she had put into the QI. There was always more work to take care of.

“Tommy, I think you confused mommy’s car with someone else’s,” Oliver replied loudly, lifted Millie into his arms and walked towards the front door where Tommy was already waiting with his nose almost pressed against the glass. “Buddy, mommy’s still at work. She is only coming back later today when-“

When Oliver saw Felicity approaching from the garage, he frowned and fell silent. Obviously it hadn’t been Tommy but Oliver himself who had confused something.

“Daddy, can I open?” Tommy asked, already reaching his hand out for the door handle.

Oliver nodded. “Sure.”

Tommy opened and immediately ran out towards his mother, throwing himself at her. Felicity caught him with a chuckle that sounded weirdly breathy and off. The smile on her lips didn’t reach her eyes and she looked so pale that Oliver was sure that if her face lost a little more color, he would be able to look right through her.

“Hi, Buddy,” Felicity whispered, carrying Tommy inside. She kissed his temple and pressed her nose against his dark hair to breathe him in for a moment, closing her eyes. Then she released the breath with a sigh and kissed his temple once more. “How was your day?”

“Emmy and I play,” Tommy replied, not exactly answering the question. “You come too?”

“Maybe later, okay?” Felicity asked, closing the door behind them. “Mommy has a little headache and wants to lie down.”

“Okay,” Tommy said sadly. “Maybe later?”

“Yes, maybe later,” Felicity promised and kissed his lips before he put him down on the floor. “Go and play with Emmy.”

While Tommy was already running back upstairs, Millie reached out her arms for her mother. She whined loudly when she didn’t get Felicity’s attention immediately. At the sound Felicity turned around with a low sigh and gave her daughter a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. She put a hand to Oliver’s bicep, kissing first Millie’s cheek and then Oliver’s lips. Then she rested her head against his shoulder with a sigh, snuggling up to him.

“Hey,” Oliver whisper and kissed the crown of Felicity’s head. “Are you okay?”

Felicity pulled back with an even wider smile, but it still failed to reach her eyes. “Yes, of course. I’m… I just have a headache and decided to cancel my last few appointments to catch a little rest. I’ll go lie down in bed, okay?”

Oliver nodded. “Sure. Do you want some tea?”

“Yeah, thanks,” Felicity smiled. She looked at Millie, who had her head rested against Oliver’s shoulder now, her eyes falling shut again and again while she was continuing to fight the sleep. Felicity stroked a hand over their daughter’s head, asking her, “Are you tired, too?”

“She didn’t want to nap today,” Oliver replied with a shrug of his shoulders. “She wants to sleep now, but then she’s only going to be awake in the middle of the night.”

Felicity nodded slowly, taking Millie from him. “Come here, Sweetie. You can join mommy in bed where we will cuddle.”

“I’ll bring you the tea as soon as it’s brewed,” Oliver said and kissed Felicity’s forehead, checking if she was running a fever only to find that her temperature seemed to be normal.

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered quietly, leaning her forehead against his lips for a moment

She tightened her hold on Millie, cradling the baby against her chest safely, before she turned around and headed upstairs. Oliver watched her closely, watched the slow movements as well as Felicity’s posture. Her shoulders were slumped and her head lowered. He hated seeing her like that.

“Felicity?” he asked in a whisper.

Felicity stood still and turned around to him. “Yes?”

“Are you sure it’s just a headache?”

Felicity nodded, putting on a forced smile. “Yes, sure. It’s just a headache. I’ll be fine tomorrow. I promise.”

She turned back around and continued to make her way upstairs. Oliver kept watching her until she was out of his sight. Pushing his hands into the pocket of his jeans, he strolled into the kitchen. He started to brew the tea for Felicity, trying to figure out what was going on with Felicity in the meantime.

She had been quite off lately, the last two weeks to be exact. He hadn’t missed that her smiles didn’t reach her eyes most of the times or that she was just generally quieter than usually. She was often tired and withdrawn into herself. It hadn’t only been today though he feared that her coming home to lie down at only four was probably a new low.

He knew that people could have a series of bad days with headaches or just feeling more exhausted that usual and wanted to catch their breath. He didn’t want to overreact and make a mountain out of molehill. Fact was that Felicity had a history of prenatal depression, though, and he just couldn’t imagine that it was just a weird coincidence this change had come at the same time as they had figured out that Felicity was pregnant again.

The news had hit both of them unexpected since they hadn’t planned on having another baby. Then it was so terribly soon like Millie was only six months old. At the beginning he had thought that Felicity just needed time to get used to the thought like he had needed time to get used to it, too. Oliver remembered very clearly that he had read that unplanned pregnancy was a contributory factor for prenatal depression, though, and the more time passed, the more worried he was.

So yes, Oliver didn’t want to overreact, but he also didn’t want to take it easy like there wasn’t the possibility of a serious issue. He had just a bad feeling like Felicity was struggling with an old enemy. They had gotten around the depression when she had been pregnant with Millie which had only made it an even more perfect ending to their family planning. The pregnancy with her had been supposed to erase the fear the pregnancy with Tommy had left. It had taken them a long time to decide if they wanted to give pregnancy another try after what they had been through with Tommy – first the pregnancy depression and then Felicity’s fall down the stairs that has almost caused Felicity and Tommy to lose their lives that one night. They hadn’t been sure if risking something like that happening again when they already had three perfectly happy and healthy children that could be affected by something going wrong was worth it.

Oliver put two mugs and the teapot on the tray, making a decision.

He and Felicity had decided to give pregnancy another chance after Tommy because they had known that they were strong enough to get through whatever would happen. They hadn’t actively made this decision again now. The pregnancy had just happened. That didn’t make it any less true, though. They were stronger than whatever could happen to them if they just faced their struggles together. That was why it was time to talk to Felicity.

The last time she had been depressive, neither of them had known what was going on until it had been way too late. Oliver had thought Felicity just needed time for herself and would come to him when she was ready, while Felicity herself had felt like she had hurt Oliver so bad already and she would only hurt him more if she was too close to him. This wasn’t going to happen to them this time. If Felicity was going to face another prenatal depression, he was going to be by her side and help her through it like she had helped him out of the dark places he had been in after the island.

Together they could do this. He had to believe that.

 

Felicity pushed her face closer to Millie’s naked tummy. The sun had left the warm in comfortable warmth and since Millie’s shirt had been full of stains of food, Felicity had taken it off. She breathed in the sweet scent of her baby and closed her eyes. When she released the air from her lungs with a sigh, she kissed her daughter’s soft skin and then snuggled her cheek to the baby’s stomach, listening to the quick but even beating of her heart.

She hated feeling like this, like someone had ripped something out of her chest and had left a deep emptiness there that Felicity just failed to fill. She had been feeling like this for the past two weeks, but she had tried to bite back that emptiness and wake her feelings back up. She had spent more time with the kids, hoping they could fill this emptiness within her. When that hadn’t worked, she had drowned herself in work, trying to be as productive as possible and actually leave the paperwork behind for a few days to work in the Applied Science Department because that was the best part about her job.

Nothing had helped. She still felt like something was missing from her life when really she should feel like she had gained something new. She and Oliver were having another baby. They got the chance to give the world one more child that would grow up loved and protected. Their lives would be even fuller than it already was. None of these thoughts reached Felicity in a way that could change anything about how she felt. She was just exhausted.

When there was a quiet knock at the door, Felicity sighed. “Come in.”

“Hey,” Oliver whispered, stepping inside of the room and closing the door behind him. “The tea is ready.”

“Thanks,” Felicity said quietly.

She hadn’t talked to Oliver about how she was feeling yet. She had told him that she just needed time to get used to the idea of another baby which she had firmly believed was the truth. The more time passed, the surer Felicity was that there was something more to it than just the unexpected surprise of having another baby so soon. And she was sure that Oliver had sensed that, too. He always sensed such things, just like she sensed it when the tables were turned and something was bothering him.

Felicity turned onto her back, holding Millie safely to her side, and looked at Oliver, who stood next to the bed and watched her carefully.

“I think we need to talk,” they said at the same time and both chuckled.

Felicity pulled Millie to her chest and robbed to Oliver’s side of the bed, making room for him to lie down on her side. Millie rolled off Felicity’s body, so she was lying between her parents. She played with her naked feet happily, making both her parents smile. When Felicity rested her hand on their baby’s tummy, feeling her steady heartbeat under the palm of her hand, Oliver’s fingers joined her there and laced through hers. Sighing, Felicity lifted her gaze to Oliver’s face.

“Where are Tommy and Emmy?”

“Still playing in her room,” Oliver replied. “I told William to keep an eye on them.”

“He is going to feel like we are only asking him to come here, so he can babysit.”

Oliver frowned slightly, shaking his head to wordlessly reassure her that William would never think that way of them. “He loves taking care of his siblings and he knows that he only needs to say a word and he can have time for himself. I reminded him of that as recently as yesterday.”

“Okay,” Felicity whispered, knowing that Oliver was probably right. William was always so happy when she asked him to hold Millie for a second or asked him to help Tommy putting on his shoes. He loved his siblings and he loved being the responsible big brother.

“Do you want to start?” Oliver asked her eventually, squeezing her fingers.

Felicity nodded slowly. “I feel exhausted and it’s not just the normal kind of exhausted after a busy day at work but like the really, really, really kind of exhausted that doesn’t go away easily.”

Oliver nodded slowly and waited for her to say something more. When Felicity just stayed silent, he said quietly, “I noticed that you are a little bit...”

“Off?” Felicity offered.

“Different,” Oliver said pointedly. He squeezed her fingers comfortingly once more. “I’m worried about you.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered back.

She had seen the worry in his eyes and she could still see it now. After what they had been through while she had been pregnant with Tommy, it was no surprise. They had never felt more apart than in those weeks when Felicity had been depressive without knowing it. She still felt a cold shiver running down her spine when she thought about how she had almost told him that maybe the best they could do was to get divorced. She hadn’t meant it and Oliver had known that. Yet she hated that memory.

“I… uhm…” Felicity frowned, trying to figure out how to say how she was feeling. “You know I kind of have trouble to get used to the idea of another baby and that is not because I don’t love this little cupcake that we are going to have already. I do. I don’t want you to think that I don’t or that-“

“Hey,” Oliver interrupted her with soft voice and Felicity fell silent, looking right in his deep blue eyes. “Don’t worry about that. I would just like to know if there is anything I can do for you to make you feel better?”

The right corner of Felicity’s word twitched slightly to a sad smile. She loved how Oliver always knew when something was wrong with her, gave her the time she might need to work through things herself first and then immediately offered his help when he felt he finally had the chance to reach her.

“I thought about this for a few days and I think there really is something that could help me,” Felicity said slowly, “but you probably won’t like it.”

Oliver reached out his free hand and played with some strands of Felicity’s hair, taking in her face intensely. He released a quiet sigh and pressed his lips together for a moment before he told her, “If it’s going to help you, no matter what it is, I will do it for you.”

“I want you to go back to QI and take my job there for a few months,” Felicity told him.

She could see the surprise in Oliver’s eyes. She had always loved her job. Since she had gotten back to work after Tommy’s birth, she had truly taken up in her work. Sure, the job had been terribly exhausting at times and there had been days that she had skipped work to stay in bed or spend the day with the kids instead. Overall she had always loved working at QI and using her knowledge and her ideas to make the company the successful factory of hope it used to be a long time ago before its reputation had suffered under the death of its CEO and the involvement of its owners in the Undertaking that had destroyed parts of the city. Her latest success in the project with Wayne Enterprise had been the perfect proof that she was taking the company into the right direction. Her work was coming to fruition and that made her very happy.

“I know this comes unexpected,” Felicity told him with a sigh, “but I have thought about it very carefully. I am so exhausted and tired all the time, so I don’t want to use the little energy I have to work. I want to spend them at home with our kids. I love my job, but I love our kids more, so if I have to temporarily give up on one of them, then it’s going to be the company.”

Oliver nodded slowly before he leaned closer over Millie’s head and kissed Felicity’s forehead. She closed her eyes with a sigh, focusing on the feeling of his lips against her skin. She sighed when Oliver parted his lips from her skin and rested his forehead against hers instead. His fingers tightened around hers on their daughter’s stomach.

“We will make this work,” he promised her in a whisper. “I’ll go back to QI for a couple of months until you are ready to come back.”

“Are you sure it’s okay?” Felicity asked, pulling back just enough to be able to look at Oliver. “I know you were relieved when we decided to turn the tables, so you could stay home with the kids and I started working.”

Oliver was quiet for a moment, considering his answer thoroughly before replied, “What’s important is that you are okay and if for that you have to step back from your position at the company for awhile, then we will make that happen. Of course I love being a stay-at-home dad, but back then we were just in that kind of situation where we could make a choice like that. You are not telling me that you just don’t want to work anymore and want me to get my butt up to work. You need a break, a well-deserved break. It doesn’t mean it has to be forever, right?”

“Right,” Felicity whispered, nodding her head. “Thank you.”

“There is no reason to thank me,” Oliver assured her with firm voice. “You made so many sacrifices for me. This one is nothing in comparison. Besides, I just need you to get better. That should be our priority right now.”

“I am sure I will be,” Felicity said, “with time.”

Oliver kissed her forehead once more, making her smile slightly. She was still exhausted, but she was relieved that she and Oliver had finally talked about this and had taken a step into the right direction that would hopefully help handling the situation. She loved how they had the kind of marriage where they could talk about everything and always worked through struggles together.

“Can I ask you something?” he asked eventually.

“Aren’t you already?” she asked back, earning her the slightest of a smile from Oliver. It didn’t last long or reach his eyes, though, so she added, “Just ask.”

“Do you think you are depressive again?”

Felicity sucked in a deep breath. She had expected this question because she had asked herself the same question those last days. It just seemed like a little bit too weird for coincidence that this feeling of tiredness and exhaustion had started right around the time they had found out she was pregnant. She knew that this tiredness and exhaustion wasn’t the normal kind. It was a heavy feeling that already lasted too long. All thinking hadn’t brought her to any certain result, though.

“I don’t know,” she whispered, shrugging her shoulders. “Maybe. I- I really don’t know.”

Oliver nodded slowly, stroking his fingertips over her cheekbone. “I think we should know if it is back, so we can figure out if we have to take more serious steps to make sure that you are going to feel better. Let’s antedate the appointment with Dr. Hampton and find out, okay?”

“Okay.” Felicity nodded, her hand tightening around Oliver’s fingers. “You’re coming with me?”

“Of course I am,” Oliver promised.

Sighing quietly, Felicity closed her eyes and rested her head against Millie’s. The little girl turned onto her side and framed her mother’s face with her tiny hands. Felicity smiled contently at her baby girl’s behavior. She loved how her children always knew what she needed.

“Felicity?” Oliver whispered.

“Hm?” Felicity asked, too tired to open her eyes.

“No matter what will happen, we are going to make it through this,” Oliver told her firmly. He kissed the crown of her head and added, “You are not alone in this because we have each other, so we are in this together.”

“Yeah,” she replied sleepily, releasing a tired sigh. Her fingers tightened around Oliver’s once more. “Together.”


	203. Just be there

“Please just sit down in the waiting room for a moment,” the receptionist said with cheerful voice. “Dr. Hampton will have time for you in a couple of minutes.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied, not even trying to match the receptionist’s smile because even just looking at it she could feel her face hurt with the effort to try. She put her wallet back into her purse and took Oliver’s hand. “Come on.”

Oliver squeezed her hand gently before he lifted it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. Felicity shot him a short glance and gave him a smile that she hoped reached her eyes more than most of her smiles of the past days had. Quietly they made their way to the small waiting room and sat down in the comfy chairs.

Felicity was kind of nervous. By now she was like ninety-five percent sure that the pregnancy depression was back and that was why she felt the way she felt. The tiredness, the exhaustion and the numbness were all part of the depression. At least that was the only reasonable explanation she had for the way she felt right now. If the doctor confirmed her suspicion, that would make it even more real, though, and Felicity wasn’t sure she was ready for that just yet.

Releasing a low sigh, Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes. She was always so tired. If Oliver hadn’t left to go to QI and get some files she had to break him in before he would take over her position starting next week, she would have probably stayed in bed all morning and only gotten up when they had gone to drop the kids at her mom’s place and head to the doctor.

“You okay?” Oliver whispered, turning his head to kiss her forehead.

“Just tired,” Felicity replied with a sigh.

Oliver put his free hand to the back of Felicity’s, holding her hand in both of his. Felicity looked down at their joined hands and stroked her thumb over the back of Oliver’s. When her thumb touched his wedding band, feeling the warm platinum against her skin, she smiled softly.

“I’m glad you’re here with me,” she whispered, angling her head to put her chin to his shoulder and look at his face.

He turned his head to look at her in return and his hold on her hand tightened before he replied, “Always.”

When he kissed her forehead once more, Felicity closed her eyes. She sighed sleepily, really feeling like she could just fall asleep right now and here.

“Mrs. Queen?”

Felicity and Oliver got up and followed the young doctor’s assistant towards the exam room where Dr. Hampton was already waiting for them. The assistant put the file on the doctor’s desk and left the room quietly, while Dr. Hampton welcomed Oliver and Felicity with a shake of their hands. He asked them to sit down in front of his desk and Felicity’s hold on Oliver’s hand tightened as they did so.

“What can I do for you?” Dr. Hampton asked, sitting down behind his desk and opening Felicity’s file. After only a couple of seconds he looked back up at them, probably having found the note his assistant must have made when Felicity had called to make an appointment a few weeks ago since he asked, “Oh, you are pregnant?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, I am.”

“Congratulations then,” he replied with a warm smile. “It’s quite soon after Camille’s birth. Was this planned?”

“No,” Felicity simply replied, shaking her head.

“We used protection. Felicity took the mini pill and she also breastfed,” Oliver explained. “It just happened nonetheless.”

“I always advise against using breastfeeding as a protection,” Dr. Hampton explained. “The mini pill is much surer, but there’s just no protection that is a hundred percent safe except for abstinence of course.”

The doctor chuckled about his own joke shortly before he started asking Felicity all kinds of questions regarding her health and when her last period had started. Felicity answered each one of them almost automatically. Given that it was her forth pregnancy she kind of knew the catalog of questions Dr. Hampton worked through.

The whole questioning barely took a few minutes, but Felicity already felt exhausted. If the pregnancy was going to go on like that, she would probably pass out within a week. She had three little children at home. Exhaustion was not really something that worked with their everyday life. It just-

“Felicity?”

Felicity looked up, finding both, Oliver and Dr. Hampton, looking at her.

“Uhm…” she made, unsure what was going on because she had gotten carried away with her thoughts.

She quickly looked at Oliver, who explained, “Dr. Hampton suggested that we could take a look at the baby, but I said that maybe it was better to talk about something else first.”

“Uhm… yes, sure,” Felicity said slowly. She looked at her doctor who looked back at her patiently, already taking in a breath to reply, but she felt the words getting stuck in her throat. Biting down on her bottom lip, she turned to look at Oliver, whose eyes were already focused on her face. She looked at him pleadingly, wordlessly asking for his help.

Oliver squeezed her fingers before he turned his head to look at the doctor. “Felicity experiences similar symptoms to the one she had during the pregnancy with Tommy when she was depressive.”

“With similar symptoms you mean…”

“Tiredness and exhaustion, lack of appetite,” Oliver started listing. His hand tightened around hers in silent comfort like he wanted her to know that he wasn’t angry with her because of this and didn’t blame her. “And she has trouble showing or feeling emotions. She gave up her job that she usually loves a lot because she says she can’t do it anymore.”

Dr. Hampton nodded slowly before he looked at Felicity, smiling at her softly. “Is that right?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes.”

He asked her a few more questions about her physical and mental state. Felicity remembered the question from the visit here during her pregnancy with Tommy. Dr. Hampton had asked her the same question then. She answered all of them as honestly as possible, drawing comfort from the warmth of Oliver’s hands around hers.

When Dr. Hampton had asked all the questions, he put his pen down and sighed. He looked at them seriously. “I can’t really tell you much more than I did the last time almost three years ago. From the symptoms you are showing, Mrs. Queen, it seems likely that you are depressive. With the two close pregnancies and the fact that this one wasn’t planned, it could play into your mental health. That suspicion is also strengthened by your history of prenatal depression.”

Felicity felt her stomach drop. Though she had known that it was the depression being back, hearing her doctor confirming it seemed to make it even worse. Whatever hope she might have had that maybe it all turned out to be unnecessary worry was gone once and for all.

“Are there any new ways to treat the depression?” Oliver asked.

Felicity could see how worried he was and given their history she understood why. If she thought about the possibility that she could fall back that deep into her dark hole that their marriage was going to take a hit from it, it worried her, too. Saying that you would be able to get through whatever was going to happen and actually living through it were just two different things.

“Unfortunately, no,” Dr. Hampton replied, shaking his head. He looked at Felicity, explaining, “The options for possible treatment are still the same. We can treat the depression with medication. You could go to therapy. Or we could wait and just carefully observe the situation. Since you don’t have thought of suicide and I assume you wouldn’t be alone but have your family around to sense changes in your health, waiting is a possibility. We can still reconsider the options for treatment when the depression gets more serious.”

“I’d…I’d like to wait.”

Felicity could hear Oliver taking in a deep breath next to her. She knew he wasn’t happy about her decision. He hadn’t been happy when she had made the same decision three years ago, either. Felicity still hadn’t changed her mind about these options, though. She wasn’t going to take any medication that hadn’t been proved in a long-term study to not have any negative effect on her baby. Those studies would never exist, though, because it was simply to unethical to test medication on pregnant women. Therapy wasn’t an alternative, either. What therapist should she be able to talk to given what she and Oliver did at night and she didn’t mean the sex they hadn’t had in weeks?

Dr. Hampton nodded. “That is fine. I will give you two some information papers, so you will know what to-“

“We… we know what to have an eye on,” Oliver explained. He quickly looked at Felicity. “Or do you…?”

“I know everything I need to know,” she assured, squeezing his hand in wordless gratitude that he didn’t argue with her on her decision to just wait and see what happened.

Dr. Hampton nodded and typed a few things into the computer before he looked up with an encouraging smile. “Alright. Are you two ready to take a first look at your baby?”

Felicity nodded. “Sure.”

They got up from their chairs and walked over to the examination table. Felicity lay down on the soft leather, unbuttoned her pants and pulled up her sweater. Her stomach was still flat, but given that she was only in her seventh week, that wasn’t really a surprise. Oliver sat down on her left side, still holding her hand, while his other hand gently stroked over her hair. When Dr. Hampton sat down to her other side, he switched on the monitor for the ultrasound and applied the gel to Felicity’s stomach.

“Cold,” Felicity whispered when she flinched at the feeling of the cold gel on her skin.

Oliver squeezed her hand and kissed her temple, making her sigh contently. She watched Dr. Hampton’s movements closely, feeling her nervousness increase easily. It was ridiculous, wasn’t it? This was her forth pregnancy and yet she was weirdly nervous about seeing her baby for the first time and that was despite the fact that she still wasn’t really used to the idea of having another child at all.

“Are you ready?” Dr. Hampton asked.

Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver. She met his eyes that showed some intense excitement under the worry about her. Felicity smiled at the way he looked at her and she could feel that it was her first honest smile in weeks. Her hand tightened around Oliver’s fingers.

Without taking her eyes off him, she replied, “Absolutely ready.”

When Dr. Hampton moved the scanner over her lower stomach, Felicity turned her head. She watched the monitor closely, trying to find anything. It wasn’t until Dr. Hampton pushed a key on the keyboard to freeze the picture that she could see it, though.

“See this?” he asked, pointing at a white spot on the picture that almost had the form of a bean. “That’s your baby.”

Seeing her baby for the first time, it really never failed to amaze her. The feeling she felt in her chest, the warmth that spread there and the certainty that she would never do anything to let this little human being inside of get hurt because she would protect him or her at all costs, it all overwhelmed her. Those were a lot of different feelings to all feel at the same moment. She felt her chest tightening with the intensity of what she was feeling.

Sucking in a deep breath, Felicity turned her head and looked at Oliver. His eyes were focused on the monitor. She could see the same mix of emotions in his eyes. He was just as overwhelmed by the moment as she was.

When Oliver eventually turned his head, his eyes finding hers, they both smiled. Without any word being spoken the bond between them strengthened once more, growing deeper with the new life they had created. Right now, right here Felicity was sure that no matter what would happen in the next months, she and Oliver would be able to handle it.

 

Oliver unlocked their front door and held it open for Felicity. She smiled at him in thanks and squeezed his hand while she was walking past him into the kitchen. Closing the door, he looked after her. After the kind of intimate moment at the doctor’s when they had gotten their first look at their baby, the doctor had printed each of them an ultrasound picture. He and Felicity had made a new appointment for in four weeks and had headed back home. Felicity had barely said a word during the drive. She had just looked at the ultrasound picture and Oliver had let her, knowing that she needed the time and room.

He also knew he had to talk to her now, though, because there were still things left to discuss. Oliver hadn’t been exactly happy about her decision to wait and see how the depression was going to process instead of treating it already, but of course he supported her nonetheless. Fact was that he had never gone to therapy or taken meds for his PTSD, either. It was just a lot easier to reject treatment himself than to watch someone he loved so much doing so.

Slowly Oliver strolled towards the kitchen and leaned into the doorframe, watching Felicity. She was leaning against the kitchen counter, nipping at a glass of water, while she was looking out of the window to the street. She was slightly pale which had been an ongoing state these last couple of weeks, but it had already gotten much better these last days.

When she turned around to him, probably noticing his gaze on her skin, she smiled shyly. “Everything alright?”

“Sure,” Oliver replied. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and leaned his head against the cool fame of the door, smiling back at her. When Felicity cocked her head in response, Oliver released a breathy chuckle. Then he asked, “Can we talk?”

Felicity nodded. She sat down on a barstool at the kitchen island and Oliver followed her there to sit down next to her and lace his fingers through his on the kitchen island. He lifted her hand to his lips and peppered half a dozen kisses to the back of it, earning him a smile from Felicity. When he lowered their linked hands back to the kitchen island, he released a long breath.

“I understand why you decided against meds and therapy,” Oliver told her and Felicity nodded slowly, “but I figured maybe it was a good idea to find a compromise like we did the last time.”

“You mean like we did by telling Lyla and making her like my emergency contact?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, exactly.”

Since Felicity had already explained that she wasn’t in for therapy three years ago, Oliver had felt like asking Lyla to do that job would be a good idea. Lyla had been the first Felicity had confided in when she had been depressive three years ago and Lyla had actually been the one to hint that maybe what was causing Felicity to feel so different was a depression. That was why it had only been logical for them to decide asking their friend to be there for Felicity in that situation. Of course Lyla had agreed to that immediately.

“I think it would be a good idea to ask Lyla to do this again and-“ Oliver started, but when Felicity shook her head vehemently, he fell silent and patiently waited for her to explain what made him reject his suggestion.

“Lyla is finally pregnant again,” Felicity told him eventually. “She and John wanted that for so long and I don’t want to take away any of the joy she feels about that.”

“I am sure Lyla is not going to see it that way,” Oliver said firmly.

Felicity shook her head. “Lyla should concentrate on her own pregnancy.”

Oliver nodded slowly. Again he wasn’t really happy with Felicity’s answer, but he accepted her wish. This was about her getting better and pushing her to do something she wasn’t comfortable with was most likely just going to make it worse for her.

“Okay, so we don’t ask Lyla,” Oliver agreed. “What about Quentin? He helped us after you gave birth to Tommy, too.”

“Yeah, but that was before my mom moved here.”

“So you could ask your mother if she could help you through this.”

Felicity hesitated for a moment before she narrowed his eyes at him and asked what Oliver assumed was a try to be playful, “You want me to commit suicide?”

He knew that she was trying to be funny, but it only made Oliver’s stomach twist painfully. Felicity wasn’t suicidal yet, but Oliver knew that this could change if the depression was going to take her further away from herself than the last time. The thought that she could do something to herself, because God knew he had been ready to die so many times since the Gambit had sunken, just hurt him more than any torture ever had.

“Felicity, this is not something to make jokes about,” Oliver told her in a whisper, his voice gentle despite the anger he felt in his chest.

Felicity looked at him for a moment, lowering her gaze and whispering, “Sorry.”

Oliver squeezed her hand, making her look at him again. “I know that humor is a way for you to deal with situations that scare you, but please not like this.”

“Sorry,” Felicity whispered once more.

“You don’t have to apologize,” he told her and kissed the back of her hand before pressing it to his chest, but I’d just appreciate if we could not make jokes like that.”

Felicity nodded. “Okay.”

Oliver smiled and squeezed her fingers. “Since you want Lyla to concentrate on her pregnancy, I guess John is not an option either?”

“Exactly.”

“So what about Thea?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “She’s your sister.”

“So?”

Releasing a deep sigh, Felicity pulled her hand away from Oliver’s. She got up from her chair and started pacing up and down in the kitchen, massaging her temples at the same time. Her eyes were squeezed shut, her face showing exhaustion.

“I can’t talk to Thea about every detail of our lives.”

“Why?”

Felicity gave him a look that had him sigh. Of course he got why she couldn’t talk to her about everything though she didn’t have much problem with that when it had been about the Little Oliver’s failure last year. Admittedly, Oliver knew that these were two very different animals, but he had just trouble being rational right now. There were too many feelings mixing in his chest for him to be rational.

“Besides, she is getting married and should focus on that and I stole the baby from her, so…”

“Okay, so not Thea, either,” Oliver stated, not even replying to Felicity’s last comment. He could tell her that Thea wasn’t angry with her as much as he wanted and Felicity would still insist that Thea would feel that way because she hadn’t been pregnant but Felicity had. “What about Laurel?”

“She has a job.”

“Caitlin?”

“She lives in Central City.”

“We ask her to move here,” Oliver suggested, “or we could also ask Ray if you are more comfortable with him. I don’t mind. If he is going to help make you feel better and you can trust in him-“

“Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him with a sigh that made him stop and look at her immediately. “All of our friends have their own lives. They don’t have time to just spend their days here and babysit me. Besides, I won’t need anyone else. As long as you are here and I know you will be, I will be fine.”

“But what if there are things that you feel you can’t talk about with me?” Oliver asked gently. “Of course I am here for you, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt to have someone here just in case there are things you-“

“I don’t want to fight with you right now,” Felicity said with an exhausted sigh, shaking her head.

Oliver frowned. “We are not fighting. We are just discussing this.”

“Well, then I am just too tired to discuss this.” Felicity stepped closer to him, put a hand to his forearm and moved it up and down there. She straightened up onto her toes and kissed him gently. When their lips parted, she whispered, “I go for a lie down.”

When she was about to walk past him, Oliver put a hand to her hip to keep her in front of him. Felicity looked at him questioningly and Oliver pressed his lips for a moment, wondering how to ask her what he needed to know.

“If one of our friends is willing to help us without me pressuring them into it,” he said slowly, “will you accept the help?”

Felicity hesitated, sucking in a deep breath. Eventually she nodded, though. “As long as it’s not John, Lyla, my mom or your sister, sure.”

“So I am allowed to tell our friends about what’s going on?” Oliver asked and again Felicity nodded. “Okay. Then I am going to head out while you are napping.”

Felicity frowned. “Where are you going?”

“Talk to our friends.”

“Wow,” she said. “You are not wasting any time, are you?”

“Of course not,” Oliver told her. He got up from the barstool and kissed the tip of Felicity’s nose, hugging her close to his chest for a moment. “The sooner we find a solution to this, the better for all of us I guess. Or do you want me to stay here?”

Felicity smiled, shaking her head. She rubbed his hands up and down his chest slowly. “No, it’s okay. I’d rather have you here when I am awake than when I am sleeping.”

Oliver nodded and pecked her lips, promising, “I’ll be back before you wake up.”

“Okay. See you later.”

“See you later,” Oliver replied. He was almost about to turn around and go when his arms around her tightened and he looked at her with hesitation. “You tell me when you feel I am pushing too much, yes? I… I want to make sure that you have everything and everyone you need, but if you feel like-“

“It’s okay,” Felicity assured him with a tired smile. “I know that it won’t hurt to have someone here to help. I just… I don’t want to bother our friends.”

“I am sure they won’t feel that way,” Oliver replied.

“If you say so.”

“Just tell me when I am doing too much or… whatever.”

Felicity nodded. “I promise.”

He kissed her forehead before he turned around and left, grabbing his keys on the way out. The sooner they set up the support system for Felicity the better for her. He just… He knew that he was pushing a lot and that he was probably moving way to quickly with all of this, but he just couldn’t bear the thought that Felicity was sick and he couldn’t help her. He just felt like he needed to do whatever he could do to help her.

Felicity had helped him out of his darkest times. That was what he wanted to do for her. He wanted to help her through this. They didn’t have the kind of marriage where they kept tab on who did what for the other and what return service there should be for that. Felicity had helped him because she loved him. He wanted to help her because he loved her. Oliver was just so afraid of failing this task. He felt so terribly helpless.

After a drive of fifteen minutes through the city Oliver parked the car at the side of the street and stepped into their friend’s house. He had hesitated about whom to go for with this though there really hadn’t been a lot of people he could ask given that Felicity had already shut out most possibilities that he would have gone for. He understood why she didn’t want John, Lyla, Thea or her mother to be the person to help her through this, though, so he accepted that.

Taking in a deep breath, Oliver knocked at their friend’s apartment door. It only took a couple of seconds before the door was opened.

“Ollie.”

“Hi, Laurel.”

Felicity had ruled out Laurel as a possible help for her because of her job, not because she was his ex. Admittedly, that was so long ago that it almost felt like it had never happened. Felicity and Laurel were friends. He and Laurel were friends. It would probably be a little awkward, but if it was going to help Felicity, he’d take the awkwardness.

“Did something happen?” Laurel asked, stepping aside to allow him inside.

Oliver followed her invitation, stepping into her apartment. He turned around to her, pushed his hands into the pocket of his pants and took in a deep breath.

“I need to ask you for your help with something and it’s a lot I am asking for you, but it’s important and you are the only person I can ask to do this, I think.”

Laurel frowned, obviously taken aback by his cryptic words. Only after a couple of seconds her eyes widened in shock and she asked, “Is something wrong with the baby?”

Oliver shook his head quickly. “No, no. We have been to our first doctor’s appointment today and he said the baby looks perfectly fine.”

“Thank God.” Laurel released a breath of relief.

“It’s Felicity,” Oliver added in a whisper.

Laurel didn’t hesitate. “What do you need me to do?”

“Be there for her,” Oliver simply replied.

“I don’t… I mean…” she pressed her lips together for a moment before she explained, “I think I need to know the whole story.”

Oliver followed Laurel into her living room and after a short moment of gathering himself for living through all of the painful memories and admitting all the terrible fears of the future he told her everything. He started with how estranged they had been at the beginning of the pregnancy with Tommy and how far they had drifted apart before they had finally found their way back to each other. He told her about how they had found out what had been going on with her but not told anyone except for the ones who had already kind of known. He also told her about how much they had struggled to decide if they should give having a third baby a try and by that risk going through another depression until he ended with how he had come here to ask her for help since the forth pregnancy was taking them back to the depression.

“Wow,” Laurel said. She hadn’t said word since he had started telling her and Oliver was more than grateful for that. “And you two kept that a secret to everyone except for Lyla, John, Donna and my dad?”

“We thought it was better that way,” Oliver replied with a sigh, rubbing his hands over his face. “Now that Lyla is pregnant, too, Felicity doesn’t want to bother her by asking for help, though. She doesn’t want any of them to help and I figured since… I don’t want to make comparisons, but maybe with what you’ve gone through with the addiction… and… well, you’re our friend, so… maybe you could help?”

Laurel nodded. “Just tell me what you need me to do.”

“It would be great if you could spend a lot of time at our place, especially when I am at QI because I took over the company as long as Felicity isn’t feeling fit enough to do so. You could just help her with whatever she needs help with, whether it’s the kids or the household… though… you can really leave the household to me. Just make sure that she is eating and maybe encourage her to go for a walk or something every now and then, so she isn’t in bed all day.”

“That sounds really serious, Ollie.”

“I know,” Oliver admitted. He sighed and moved his fingers through his short hair. “Usually she is taking care of herself, but I feel like this time it’s already worse than the last one. She spends most of her time in bed, sleeping or at least resting, and I’m just worried.”

Laurel nodded. “Does Felicity know you are asking me to do this?”

“I asked her if she was accepting help if one of our friends would agree to help,” Oliver explained. “I am going to make sure that my working hours at QI are limited and I will work from home as much as possible, but that would still leave several hours that I’d like you to be there for Felicity. Would that work with your job? I know you are kind of busy and-“

“I will make the time,” Laurel interrupted him with firm voice. “I will make this work.”

“Maybe it won’t be as bad as it looks like right now and it’s enough as we are both on call, so we are there if Felicity needs us.”

“We will just see what will happen in the next weeks and take day after day,” Laurel suggested.

Oliver released a long breath, feeling some of the tension he had felt building in his shoulders for the past days loosening.

“Thank you, Laurel.”

Laurel shook her head. “Not for that.”

“I will go back home to Felicity now and tell her that you agreed to help,” Oliver stated. “Can you come by tomorrow, so we can discuss these things with Felicity?”

“Of course.”

Oliver thanked her once more before he got up and walked towards the door. He had the door handle already in his hand, when Laurel held him back.

“Ollie?”

“Hm?” he asked, turning around to her.

Laurel hesitated shortly before she said, “The thing between us has been forever ago and it really feels like in another lifetime-“

“Absolutely,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“Which is why I hope it’s not too awkward when I tell you that it’s really amazing how much you have grown and what man you are right now. You’re a great husband and I think you are exactly what Felicity needs right now. She couldn’t have anyone better by her side.”

“I hope so,” Oliver replied and smiled at Laurel shortly before he opened the door and left.

 

When the mattress next to her dipped, Felicity opened her eyes. Immediately Oliver screwed up his face and whispered, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I was just dozing anyway,” Felicity replied with a sleepy sigh, patting the bed next to her to make Oliver lie down there.

Oliver didn’t need to be asked twice. He lay down next to her, laced their fingers on the mattress between them and scooted as close to her as possible. Their foreheads were resting against each other’s, their noses moving against each other’s slowly.

“Laurel is going to help us,” Oliver stated eventually.

Felicity pulled back a little, so she could look at him. “Laurel?”

Oliver nodded. “I told her everything and asked for her help and she agreed immediately.”

“What about her job?” Felicity asked, frowning.

“She says she will take the time.”

Felicity just nodded, trying to process that. She and Oliver had great friends. It had been proved once more. Yet Felicity was kind of surprised that someone had really agreed to this so early. She had probably underestimated the bond of their friendship.

“Are you okay with that?”

Felicity looked in Oliver’s insecure eyes with a smile and nodded her head. “Yes, I am. Thank you for organizing this.”

“No reason to thank me,” Oliver replied. “We swore to take care of each other and I will forever live up to that vow.”

“So will I,” Felicity promised, feeling butterflies in her stomach at the way Oliver looked at her. She smiled tired. “I love you.”

Oliver smiled. “I love you, too.”

Felicity kissed Oliver’s lips before she snuggled herself to his chest. He rested her ear against his heart, listening to its slow and even beating. Oliver put his arms around her tightly, holding her to him.

“How long until we have to pick up the kids from my mom’s?”

“Long enough to enjoy some quality cuddle time.”

“Great,” Felicity replied with a sigh, “because that’s exactly what I need right now.”

Oliver kissed the crown of her head. “Then that’s exactly what you will get.”


	204. New normal

“Everything good.”

“But, Dr. Tommy, I feel sick.”

“You need meds.”

“Oh yes, two reds and one green.”

“I’m the doctor, Emmy.”

“Sorry. What meds do I need, Dr. Tommy?”

“Hm… Two reds and one green.”

Felicity smiled when Tommy lifted the little clipboard they had bought him and wrote down a few notes in Emmy’s clinical record. He looked at his scrawl proudly before he put the clipboard away and walked over to the small couch table where Laurel was sitting and working on her laptop. When Tommy reached out his hands for the jelly beans, she looked up at him and puckered her lips, though.

“Hey, you two, those are going to be the last jelly beans for now,” she said gently. “Mommy is going to scold me if she finds out I have been letting you eat so many of them.”

“No, mommy won’t mind.”

“Mommy won’t mind?” Felicity repeated her daughter’s words.

Emmy gasped for breath. She turned onto her side to look at her mother, smiling at her mischievously at being caught to get even more sweets after she had already been told that it were enough for now. “Mommy, you’re here.”

“Yeah, mommy is here,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “Aunt Laurel is right by the way. Each of you can eat two more and then that’s enough for today. You don’t like the dinner if you continue like that.”

Felicity watched Tommy picking the jelly beans for him and his older sister before he walked back to his patient to give her the meds. Since the little boy had gotten his first doctor’s kit a few weeks ago, he was playing doctors all day and everyone in the family had to act as a patient, fortunately several times each day. It kind of accommodated Felicity because with the depression lying in bed or on the couch and more or less pretending to be sick made it easy for her to join in. Lying down and resting was what Felicity liked to do anyway.

Turning away from Emmy and Tommy, she walked to Millie, who was lying on a blanket under her baby gym and played with the toys that were attached to it. Felicity wondered how much more difficult things would be if Tommy and Emmy had been born closer together or even Tommy and Millie. The youngest of her children was the easiest to take care of, always content and easy to satisfy. With Tommy or Emmy being so young when there was another baby on the way, it would have been an even worse nightmare. Felicity lifted the baby into her arms and kissed her rosy cheek a few times, making the baby squeal happily.

“Feel better?” Laurel asked, shutting down her laptop.

“Yes, much better. My headache ceased,” Felicity explained, sitting down in one of the armchairs with Millie in her lap. The six-month-old snuggled herself to her mother’s chest and Felicity’s kissed the crown of her baby’s head. She rested her cheek against Millie’s head with a sigh and looked at Laurel, who was smiling at the two of them softly.

Laurel had been here every day of the last five days. She had gotten here around the time Oliver had left to head to QI and had left around the time he had come back. Felicity was grateful for the help. She wasn’t really herself lately and having someone here to help her with the kids and making sure she had enough time to rest was great. Besides, the kids loved having her Aunt Laurel here every day. Having someone else than their parents taking care of them was always fun for the kids given that everyone else tended to spoil them a lot more than their parents did and Oliver and Felicity already considered themselves the kind of parents that spoiled their kids a lot.

“You seem to have everything under control with the kids,” Felicity stated, looking first at Millie and then at Emmy and Tommy. Three kids were a lot to take care of, especially for one person.

“That’s only because they make it so easy,” Laurel replied. “They are the sweetest. Oliver and you have really done a great job with them. Emmy and Tommy even helped me doing the dishes after lunch. Nobody could have convinced Sara and me to do the dishes when we were their age.”

Felicity didn’t miss the pain in her friend’s eyes. It had been eight year since Sara had died, but that didn’t mean that Laurel or anybody else missed her any less. Her sudden death had left all of them traumatized back then and those wounds had never truly healed. Her death had come too sudden and it had ripped a hole in all of their lives that had never been truly filled after and if even Felicity was feeling that way, she knew that it had to be a million times worse for Laurel. Felicity had known Sara for barely a year, while Laurel had known her all her life.

“I am sorry, Laurel,” Felicity whispered, reaching out her hand for her friend.

When she took Felicity’s hand and squeezed her fingers in silent gratitude, she said, “It could have been much worse. At least I got a new sister. It just doesn’t mean I don’t miss Sara anymore because I still do.”

Felicity nodded. She understood what Laurel meant thought she doubted that she understood the depth of her words. She had never lost a sister. She had only gained two in Thea and Laurel. The two women sat in quiet for a moment longer, just holding each other’s hand and comforting each other about the loss of a sister both of them missed even if one had never had her.

Eventually Laurel smiled at Felicity and pulled her hand back, asking, “How are you feeling today? Not just the headache, I mean in general.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “It’s the same feeling as always which is a lot of emptiness with some short moments of either sorrow or joy and I know that this sounds like some terrible cliché, but it’s true nonetheless.”

Laurel nodded slowly, just watching Felicity quietly without saying a word. Eventually Felicity turned her eyes away from Laurel and looked at Millie, who seemed to enjoy the cuddle time with her mommy a lot. Felicity stroked through her daughter’s short hair and kissed the crown of her head.

She hated feeling like this. She had hated it when she had been pregnant with Tommy already. In a way it had been much easier back then because all she had had to do back then was to pretend to be fine for Emmy. Now there were three little human beings needing her to be fine. It was probably three times as exhausting, maybe even more.

It was exactly why she had had so many struggles with trying to figure out if she wanted a third baby after Tommy. She had been too scared that the depression would come back and she’d be unable to still make things work enough for her family. She hadn’t wanted to put Emmy and Tommy through a situation where their mother wasn’t herself anymore only to have one more child. She had been lucky with her pregnancy with Millie, but it seemed like she was a lot less lucky with this forth, unexpected pregnancy.

“It just feels like I am being punished for something, but I don’t know what it is,” Felicity mumbled to herself.

“Punished with the pregnancy?” Laurel asked quietly, shooing a quick look at Emmy and Tommy to make sure they hadn’t heard her.

Oliver and Felicity had decided not to tell the kids. Most of their friends knew that she was pregnant given the pregnancy parties she, Laurel, Thea and Lyla had done together. She and Oliver had decided to wait telling the kids until the thirteenth week at least, though. Too much could happen until then. At the terrifying thought of anything happening to the baby Felicity lowered her face to her lower stomach, looking at Laurel.

“No,” she said firmly, shaking her head, “not with the pregnancy, just with feeling like this. It’s just not fair. Oliver and I try to be good people and we try to do everything right and yet this is what we get for it.”

Laurel hesitated before she explained, “I often hear that during the AA meetings. There are people there who did everything right. They were good people, often doing charity and just trying to be good in general. Then something happened in their life, something bad that they certainly didn’t deserve and it just went down from there. It’s like a spiral they feel they can’t get out of until they finally start fighting. It’s not fair, but unfortunately it’s life.”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, that makes a lot of sense. It’s not fair, but it makes sense.”

Life just wasn’t fair. Felicity should know that. She lived with a man who had been through more than anyone deserved and most of her friends had been through more than they deserved. She had been through more than she deserved with her father and now with this. It wasn’t fair, but it did make sense.

Sighing quietly, Felicity leaned back and closed her eyes. She tightened her arms around Millie’s little body, cradling her daughter closer to her chest. In life there were ups and downs. She knew that. Her life hadn’t always been perfect before this pregnancy, either. She had been through some downs, but with time she had always managed to fight through it until she was on her way up again.

It just took time, so Felicity wouldn’t push it. She would wait until things got better and she could go back to what used to be her normal life.

 

 

“Oh, Millie, I think daddy is coming home,” Felicity said when she heard the key turning in the lock. “I am sure daddy is up for a good cuddle, too.”

Thanks to Oliver’s super-senses he always knew exactly where they were and always found them. Today was no difference, so it only took a couple of seconds before Felicity saw him stepping coming closer. His hair was tousled, his face showing exhaustion. He smiled at them nonetheless when he leaned into the door frame and watched the two of them.

“Hey,” he whispered.

“Hi,” Felicity replied, smiling back at him softly. “How was work?”

“Terrible,” he replied with a chuckle. “Everyone misses you and I am sure that I heard more than one person mumble that they want me to magically disappear.”

“I am sure you are doing great.”

“I’d say I am doing okay, but they are spoilt because they had the best boss ever,” Oliver told her. Sighing, he leaned his head against the doorframe. “How are you feeling?”

“Now that you are home?” Felicity asked. “A lot better.”

Not saying a word, they both smiled tiredly at each other. Despite what was going on with her, things between her and Oliver were still going well. They were both worried and scared, but they talked about it honestly and leaned on each other and that was why their marriage didn’t seem to be as much affected by her depression as the last time. Maybe it was also because they knew what was going on with her this time and Felicity didn’t feel this constant anger as she had a few years ago. She was more tired and felt exhausted more easily, but she didn’t feel like her emotions were one terrible mess.

Still not saying a word, Felicity held out her hand for Oliver. He stepped closer and took it, bending down to kiss Felicity’s lips gently before he kissed the crown of Millie’s head.

“Are you two enjoying a good cuddle?” he asked.

“We are,” Felicity replied. “And we wondered if you would like to come here and cuddle with us.”

“Oh, daddy would love to.”

Oliver slipped out of his shoes and was about to lift Felicity’s upper body from the couch, but she quickly put Millie into his arms and made him lie down on top of her with his back pressed to her chest and his head resting against her shoulder. Oliver stretched out his legs, the lower part dangling over the armrest, and he sighed deeply.

Felicity pushed the lapels of his suit jacket apart and started pulling the fabrics down his arms. Oliver helped her and slipped out of the sleeves. Felicity dropped the piece of clothing to the floor carelessly and loosened Oliver’s tie before taking it off and letting it follow. Then she made quick work of the three topmost buttons of his shirt and moved her fingers over his naked chest. Oliver released a sound that almost sounded like the purring of a cat. He leaned his head back a little more, and turned his face against the side of her neck to rub his stubble against her tender skin.

“You know, this is what I wanted to do for you tonight,” Oliver told her.

“What? Snuggle up to me and touching my boobs?” Felicity asked, scratching her nails over his nipples gently. She moved her fingers away from his breast and up to his shoulders, massaging the tight knots there. “I would have killed you if you had tried.”

“Still sensitive?” Oliver asked.

“Terribly sensitive.”

“Should we call Dr. Hampton and-“

Felicity shook her head and kissed Oliver’s temple to calm him down. “No, I am fine. It’s just the normal pregnancy soreness.”

“You’re sure?” Oliver asked, putting a hand to the outside of her thigh and rubbing up and down gently.

“Very sure,” Felicity assured him, nodding her head. “It’s not that bad. It’s just terribly annoying and a little bit painful but not that bad.”

“Okay.”

Oliver relaxed back against her once more and closed his eyes. Felicity went back to massaging his shoulders. Millie meanwhile supported her body by propping herself up onto her forearms on Oliver’s chest. She smiled at her daddy happily, making both of her parents smile, too.

“So what did you want to do for me?” Felicity asked eventually.

“Help you relax, maybe massage your shoulders,” Oliver replied. He turned his head and kissed Felicity’s hand.

Felicity chuckled. “I am not doing much that would justify that my hard-working husband should massage my shoulders when he comes home from a long day at work.”

“Hey, you are an amazing mom and you are carrying our baby. That’s a hell of a lot of work in my eyes,” Oliver explained. Then he looked around with a frown. “Speaking of babies, where are Emmy and Tommy?”

“Laurel took them to the supermarket to get new detergent. We ran out of it and Millie might have slobbered on each of her shirts, so we definitely need to do a laundry day tomorrow.”

“I could have headed to the supermarket before coming home.”

Felicity didn’t reply. She remembered very well that her depression or rather the rough times it had caused between her and Oliver had started the evening he had forgotten about the detergent she had asked him to buy. She had had the phone almost in her hand when she had remembered this a few hours ago and that was why she had decided that maybe it was better not to call him.

“I think Emmy and Tommy didn’t mind the little shopping tour,” she explained. “They should be back any mo-“

As if on cue she heard the key turning in the lock of the front door. A second later she heard the door being opened and two pairs of feet running closer.

“Daddy!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly.

Without any hesitation she ran to the couch and crawled on top of her parents. Felicity could feel Oliver’s chest rising just a little bit from hers, holding itself up with the strength of his abs to keep his and their daughter’s weight away from her. Carefully avoiding to squash her little sister, Emmy snuggled to Oliver’s side and put her hand over Oliver’s on Millie’s back.

“I want cuddle, too,” Tommy said from the door.

“Then come here, Buddy,” Felicity suggested, gesturing for her son to come closer.

Tommy did as his mother told him. He crawled onto the couch and snuggled up to his family. His face came to rest on his baby sister’s cheek. He sighed contently.

“A family moment at its finest,” Oliver said with a smile.

“Which sounds like my cue to leave.” Oliver and Felicity both looked up at Laurel, who stood in the frame of the door and looked at them with a smile. “I put the detergent in the washing room. We see each other tomorrow.”

“Thanks, Laurel,” Oliver and Felicity said in chorus.

“Thanks, Aunt Laurel,” Emmy and Tommy said in chorus, too.

They all chuckled and even Millie, who probably didn’t even know what they were laughing about, released a happy squeal. Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s and tried to memorize this moment, just in case she needed it to get herself through a harder time later on.


	205. Ten years since

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Here](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/158443483275/felicitys-depression-storyline-in-time-for-a) are some thoughts on the current depression storyline that you might want to check out.

**T:** Last preparations were just finished. Most people are already here. You can come here anytime. We are ready!

Felicity smiled at the screen of her phone, feeling her heartbeat speeding up slightly. She had been planning this day for so long now that finally having it here and seeing Oliver’s reaction to the surprise she had prepared for him was almost making her a bit nervous. Usually she would probably be just excited and not nervous, but the pregnancy and the depression just messed with her emotions. Yet this day and what she had planned for it was the first time in a while that she felt this excited about something, so maybe whatever she had been feeling was already starting to cease.

Just when Felicity was about to put her phone into her purse, her phone vibrated in her hand.

**T:** By the way I can’t believe you managed to create all of this on your own! It’s amazing and Ollie will love it. xoxo

**F:** I’ll get Oliver in the car now. We should be there in fifteen minutes.

Felicity quickly put her phone into her purse, took in a deep breath and headed towards the living room. He was sitting on the edge of the couch, typing away on his laptop intently and only stopping every now and then to look up things in the papers next to the laptop. He had a frown on his forehead and slight bags under his eyes. Felicity knew that he was trying to give his best as long as he was stepping in for her at QI and she also knew that it really wasn’t easy for him. Oliver had never been particularly fond of a job in an office.

Slowly she approached him, walked around the couch and climbed on the backrest. She sat down right behind him, put her hands to his shoulders and gently pulled him closer until Oliver leaned back and rested his head high against her thigh with a sigh. Felicity ducked her head and kissed his hair, massaging his tense shoulders.

Slowly Oliver’s fingers moved from her ankle up her leg to the hem of her A-line skirt at the mid of her thigh. It was quite an intimate touch but yet Felicity could feel the innocence in it. Sex had fallen flat lately as she wasn’t really feeling any desire for it. Oliver accepted that and didn’t push, so she knew that his touch was simply a silent gratitude that she was taking care of him like that. If she asked him to stop or he felt the slightest discomfort in her reaction, he would immediately stop. His touch felt comfortable, though, sending warm shivers down her back.

“I think you could use a break,” Felicity told Oliver, snuggling her cheek against the crown of his head. “You’ve been working since Thea picked up the kids.”

“I know. I just need to get this over with, so I can come home a little earlier the next days,” Oliver told her. “But maybe a break wouldn’t be so bad. We could maybe take a walk if you’re up to it. I am sure you could use some fresh air as much as I could.”

Felicity moved her hands from his shoulders up the sides of his neck to his head. She massaged his temples for a moment before she bent his head back. She slanted her lips over his in a gentle kiss. When she leaned back she watched Oliver rolling his lips into his mouth and licking them, savoring the taste of her lips that was left. It made her smile.

“I was thinking maybe we could go away on a trip.”

Oliver frowned. “Now?”

“Well, it would be a… a short trip and it wouldn’t be very far away, but, you know, a few minutes in the car.”

“Sure, sounds like fun,” Oliver replied with a smile. “We could maybe-“

“Oh, I already know where we are going,” Felicity interrupted him quickly. “We just put on some shoes and I will drive us.”

Oliver frowned slightly, but he quickly hid it with a smile. “Alright then.”

Just like Felicity had suggested, the just put on some shoes and left their house. Felicity decided to drive, almost regretting it a little as soon as the car started moving since Oliver now had nothing to do but to ask her again and again where they were going. It was almost a little bit annoying, but at the same time so damn cute that Felicity just couldn’t be mad at him.

“Wait, are we going to the beach house?” Oliver asked when Felicity directed the car into the street of said beach house.

“We are,” Felicity confirmed.

“You should have told me. I would have brought my swimwear. We took it back home with us when we were here with the kids the last time and-“

“You won’t need your swimwear,” Felicity told him.

She parked the car in front of the house, turned off the engine and turned around in her seat to look at Oliver. She reached out her hands and took one of his, kissing the knuckles before just holding it.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked, putting his free hand to her cheek.

Felicity nodded. “I’m okay. I… uhm… I’ve kind of got a surprise for you.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “For me?”

“Is there any other husband here that I might want to surprise?” Felicity asked, looking around in the car for a moment, before she looked back at Oliver and cocked her head. “Can’t see any, so I guess it is indeed for you, yes.”

“Okay, and what is it?”

Felicity nodded her head to the beach house. “I’ll show you.”

Together they got out of the car and hand in hand they walked towards the back of the house. Felicity felt her heartbeat speeding up a little more and her fingers tightened around Oliver’s hand in response. Just when they reached the garden behind the house, Oliver stopped, making Felicity stop with him, while a hurricane of applause greeted them.

Around seventy people had gathered in the garden of the beach house. Felicity saw their friends here from Starling as well as from Central City, saw some people she had barely ever met since she had gotten married to Oliver but knew he would want to have here like Jessica Danforth. And she saw Walter and Raisa, who she had made very sure would come. Some tables had been set up as well as a wide buffet with finger food. A bar had been built right next to the house, waiters walking around to serve champagne and other kinds of drinks. Felicity was glad that the weather was playing into her plans because if it had been a rainy day she would have been screwed.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, turning her head to look at Oliver and watch his reaction. He looked amazed but also a little bit clueless about what was going on here. It made Felicity smile softly. She squeezed his fingers and Oliver turned around to her, cocking his head slightly.

“What is all of this?” he asked.

“This is your comeback-party,” Felicity explained with a soft smile. “It’s been ten years since you came back to Starling after… you know… the Gambit… and I figured that you deserve a really huge party for that. Something like that doesn’t happen every day after all. It’s my way and the way of your family and friends to tell you how grateful we all are that you are here. I can only speak for myself, but I know how much it means to have you in my life, what huge difference it would make if you hadn’t come back and you hadn’t become a part of my life. You have given me a home and family and you have added a greater purpose to my life. That is why I am so grateful that you have never given up and that you have found your way back home to Starling despite everything you have been through these terrible five years. If you hadn’t, we wouldn’t have found each other and we wouldn’t have these wonderful kids and this amazing life, so… thank you for never giving up and for coming back to Starling, even if it took a while.”

Felicity could see a hundred different emotions ghosting over his face, from amazement over a little bit of sadness and regret to absolute joy. His eyes were welling with tears, his bottom lip trembling slightly. It took a long moment before a wide smile broke across his lips, brightening up his entire face. He put his arms around her shoulders and pulled her into a tight hug. He ducked his head, hiding his face against the side of her neck and breathing in the scent of her skin. Felicity smiled, closing her eyes and stroking her hands up and down Oliver’s back comfortingly.

They stayed in the tight hug for a long moment before Oliver pulled away just enough to lean his forehead against hers and whisper, “Thank you.”

“Anything for you,” Felicity whispered back and kissed Oliver gently.

The kiss was broken soon, though, when the kids joined them and all six of them, plus the yet to be born baby that was growing inside of Felicity, gathered in a huge family hug. Felicity lifted Tommy into her arms, while Oliver held Emmy against his chest and William kept Millie attached to his hip.

Felicity’s eyes stayed drawn on Oliver’s face, watching him working on getting a hold on his emotions. Felicity kissed the underside of his jaw and Oliver’s eyes met hers. She smiled at him gently and he gave her a nod of his head, telling her that he was fine. Then he kissed her forehead, wordlessly thanking her once more.

 

 

“I have never met Grandma Moira, but mommy and daddy say she was really nice,” Emmy explained, “and that she would have liked me.”

Oliver smiled, approaching his older daughter. She was sitting on Walter’s thighs, eating a cookie and leaving a lot of small crumbs on his pullover. As soon as she saw Oliver coming closer, she smiled widely.

“Daddy, did you know Walter was married to Grandma Moira?”

“Yes, I did,” Oliver told her with a nod of his head and sat down on the chair next to Walter. After he had been going from one group of people to the next, thanking everyone he had gotten to talk to yet for coming and chatting for a while, taking a seat for a few minutes surely wouldn’t hurt. “Are you annoying Walter?”

“No, I am not,” Emmy replied immediately, shaking her head firmly. Then she looked at Walter. “Right?”

“Oh, no, she is not annoying me at all,” Walter promises. “She is keeping me company.”

“Yeah, I am keeping him company,” Emmy repeated, nodding her head vehemently.

Oliver smiled and winked at her. “That’s really nice of you. I think Sara was looking for you, though. Maybe you want to go and show her the house?”

Emmy smiled, nodding her head. She looked at Walter and kissed his cheek, the elder man’s face showing surprise. Then she slid off of his lap and reached out her hand for him, shaking it. “It was nice meeting you, Walter.”

“It was very nice meeting you, too, Emmeline.”

Emmy smiled at him for a moment longer before she turned around and ran to where Lyla was standing with Caitlin and Felicity, probably to ask them where her best friend was. Oliver looked after her for a moment before he turned to Walter.

“I hope she really didn’t bother you. Emmy is a sweetheart, but, well, she’s Emmy,” Oliver said with a chuckle. “She can be a little bit pushy, especially if she likes someone a lot.”

Walter chuckled, shaking his head. “Really, it’s fine. She has grown up so much. I can barely believe it. The last time I saw her she was maybe two years old.”

Oliver nodded, releasing a deep breath. “She started kindergarten in summer. It’s crazy.”

“Not more crazy than you being back for ten years already,” Walter replied with a smile. “You know, it’s weird, but sometimes it feels like it has only been yesterday and other days it feels almost like a lifetime ago. I remember that first evening when you were back here and the embarrassing quiet during dinner.”

“Or me asking you about sleeping with my mother,” Oliver added.

Walter chuckled, shaking his head. “I think that would be every son’s reaction to a situation like that. I just want you to know that I really loved your mother.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered and lowered his gaze with a sigh. “I know.”

“Speaking of wives, Felicity really did an amazing job here.”

Oliver’s smile widened and he felt his stomach flutter. He was always a lot more touched by someone complimenting Felicity than he was when someone complimented him. He didn’t know why that was. It just was that way.

“Yes, Felicity is amazing in general,” Oliver replied. He turned his head to look for her, but couldn’t find her, so he looked back at Walter. “I am really glad that you came here today. I know it’s been awhile since we have last seen each other. Somehow after you and mom separated, we lost contact and I am sorry for that. We should change that.”

Walter smiled. “That would be nice, but it won’t be easy.”

“Why?” Oliver asked with a frown.

“I am going back to England.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Oh.”

“I met someone and…” he gestured with his hand. “I figured it was time to give love another try.”

“I am really happy for you.”

Walter smiled. “I am happy for you, too. You deserve to have all of this and I know your parents would-“

“Daddy! Daddy!”

Tommy came running towards them, took Oliver’s hand and started tugging. Instead of getting up from his chair, Oliver pulled at Tommy’s hand and tugged him against him. He lifted him into his arms and peppered his face with kisses, making the boy squeal.

“Daddy is having a conversation,” Oliver whispered into his ear. “You can’t just interrupt him like that. You gotta ask if daddy has time and wants to come with you.”

Oliver kissed Tommy’s cheeks a few times more and sat his son down on his thighs.

“Daddy, I want to show you something,” Tommy told him. “You coming with me?”

Oliver kissed Tommy’s head. “Okay, I am coming with you.”

He lifted Tommy from his thighs and put him on the floor next to him. When he got up, Walter did the same.

“I hope you will come by and say goodbye before you leave for Europe,” Oliver said.

“Of course,” Walter replied, holding out his hand for Oliver. “I wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye to Thea, Felicity and you.”

“Glad to hear that,” Oliver replied.

He took Walter’s hand, shaking it, and pulled the man into a short hug. They had had a slightly bumpy start, but at the end they had been family. Oliver knew he could always count on Walter. Not having him here anymore, even if it had been years since they had seen each other the last time outside from charity events, wasn’t going to be easy.

“Enjoy the rest of the day,” Oliver said, squeezing Walter’s shoulder, before he turned to Tommy, who immediately grabbed his hand. “Okay, what do you want to show me, Buddy?”

“Uncle Tommy, granny and grandpa and Aunt Sara.”

Oliver frowned, following his son to where he was tugging him closer to the beach. He said hi to some people who greeted him, quickly asking William if he was okay when they walked past where he was standing and talking to Barry. Oliver was sure that Felicity had told their friend that William was a fan of the Flash. Even if he couldn’t tell him who he was, it was just nice to know this his son had met his idol. Oliver would just swallow down the slight bitterness about his son’s idol not being the Arrow as it was supposed to be.

Oliver didn’t have much time to think about that, though. Tommy was continuing to tug him closer to the beach. There was a rack made of iron fixed into the sand, three photo frames tied towards it and dangling slightly in the wind.

“See?” Tommy asked. “Uncle Tommy, grandma and grandpa and Aunt Sara.”

Oliver looked at the photos of said people, taking in some deep breaths. When Tommy tugged at Oliver’s pants, he lifted his son into his arms and kissed his cheek. He looked at the faces of the four people that had been so close to him but that he had lost too early. He had lost a lot of people, but the loss of these four probably hurt the most.

“Did mommy do this, too?” Oliver asked his son.

Tommy nodded. “Mommy says they be here, but heaven is too far away.”

Oliver smiled. He looked at the candle that was fixed in the sand next to the rack. The glass container the candle was in was imprinted with the words _This light shines as the symbol of lives and loves remembered._

“Daddy?” Tommy asked with quiet voice.

“Hm?” Oliver asked, tearing his eyes off the photos of the people he had lost and looking into the blue eyes of his son.

“That true? They be here?”

Oliver smiled. “If mommy said they would be here, then that’s true. You know, mommy’s always right.”

“Always?”

“Always,” Oliver ensured Tommy, “because mommy is the smartest woman in the world.”

Tommy smiled and rested his hand against Oliver’s shoulder with a sigh. “I love mommy.”

Oliver chuckled, kissing his son’s forehead. “I love mommy, too.”

“I love mommy more.”

“Not sure about that. I love mommy a lot.”

“I love mommy more,” Tommy insisted, lifting his head from Oliver’s shoulder and looking at him with an angry frown.

“How about we love mommy the same?”

“No,” Tommy replied, shaking his head. “I love mommy more.”

Oliver puckered his lips, considering disagreeing with his son once more. He knew his own stubbornness and he knew his son’s stubbornness, though. That was why he decided to just say nothing at all. Instead he just stroked his hand over his son’s back and looked back at the photos.

At days like these, really all special days, he remembered how much he missed these people. Not having his parents or his best friend or Sara here to celebrate that he had been back for ten years now just left a bitter taste in his mouth. Thea was here and with the team and Felicity and the kids he had a whole new family, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t miss the ones he had lost. He hated that they had never gotten to know that he had finally found the right woman to spend the rest of his life with and that he had gotten married to her and had had kids with her. He hated that they would never know.

“I am sure they would be proud, Mr. Oliver.”

At the sound of the familiar, warm voice Oliver turned around to see Raisa standing behind him with a gentle smile playing on her lips. She had her hair tied back into a low ponytail and wore a beautiful dress. Oliver wondered if he had ever seen her in anything else than the uniform she had worn for work in the mansion.

“Raisa,” he said, almost breathed her name. Adjusting Tommy’s position on his arms, Oliver stepped forward and hugged Raisa. He had always had a good relationship with her, a better one than to his parents at times. “It’s so good to see you again.”

“I was very happy when your wife invited me,” Raisa replied, moving her hands over his chest to smooth some winkles from his dark red button down. “Mrs. Felicity was so nice to me.”

“That’s… that’s just who Felicity is,” Oliver explained with a wide smile. “She is just an amazing person.”

“I always knew you would find someone like her,” Raisa told her. “You made mistakes when you were younger, but you always had a good heart. Are you happy?”

“Very,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “Felicity is wonderful and our kids are amazing. My life is like a dream come true. Did you meet all of them yet?”

“Your daughter, Emmeline, introduced herself. She reminds me a lot of Ms. Thea.”

Oliver chuckled. “Emmy is a one of a kind. This is Tommy by the way.” Tommy turned his head against Oliver’s neck, hiding slightly. “He’s a little shy.”

“Tommy like Mr. Tommy?” Raisa asked shooting a short look at the photo of Tommy Merlyn.

Oliver nodded. “Yes. When Felicity and I learned that we were having a baby boy, we discussed names. At first I thought it was better to give him a name of his own, but… I don’t know. We chose the name Thomas Robert instead.”

“I am sure Mr. Tommy would be very happy about this way of honoring him,” Raisa told him, “as would be Mr. Queen.”

“Thank you, Raisa,” Oliver said. “That means a lot to me.”

Raisa had been serving in the Queen Mansion for very long. She had been like family, not just to Thea and him, but to some extend also for Robert and Moira. She had known them very well. Oliver had hated the thought that she had lost her job when the mansion had been taken from them.

“Where are you working now?”

“With another family,” Raisa explained. “They are nice people.”

“So they treat you well?”

Raisa’s smile faded for a short moment before she repeated, “They are really nice people.”

Oliver wished he could offer her a job, but he knew that once this unexpected baby was born and Felicity was feeling better, she’d want to go back to work. He would take care of the kids again then and Raisa would lose her job again because he was almost positive that he got it handled. Making her quit for a few months to help them but dismissing her again then wouldn’t be fair to either of them.

“I wish I could give you a job,” he said slowly, “but-“

“Oh, no, no,” Raisa hurried to say, taking his hand and squeezing it. “I know that you are staying home with your kids. I am so happy you decided to do this, Mr. Oliver.”

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered, squeezing her hand, too. “Staying home with the kids really makes me happy. I never thought I would want a life like this, but it just makes me so incredibly happy.”

“That sounds wonderful,” Raisa said. She hesitated for a moment before she added, “I hope you won’t think that I am too pushy when I ask this-“

“You could never be too pushy,” Oliver told her. “You are my friend.”

Raisa smiled, obviously touched by his words. Then she squeezed his hand and asked, “Is everything alright with Mrs. Felicity?”

Oliver faltered for a moment, frowning slightly. He caught himself quickly, putting on a smile, but he could see in Rasia’s eyes that she was looking right through it. Nonetheless he replied, “Of course she is.”

Raisa cocked her head. “You have always been a bad liar, Mr. Oliver. I always knew when you stole cookies and lied to me about it.”

Oliver pressed his lips together and pulled them into his mouth. He lowered his gaze to his feet, whispering, “I’m sorry.”

Raisa smiled mildly. “You don’t have to. I just want you to know that I still love your family very much, so if you ever need my help, I will be here. I have served your family for so long, you have become my family.”

Oliver looked into Raisa’s soft eyes and smiled at her. “Thank you.”

“Always,” she promised, squeezing his hand once more. She straightened up and kissed his cheek before she announced, “I think it is time I will go and see Ms. Thea.”

“Hey, Tommy, will you help Raisa with finding Aunt Thea?” Oliver asked his son.

When Tommy nodded, Oliver kissed his cheek and put him to the floor. The boy hesitated for a moment before he took Raisa’s hand and waited for her to come with him.

“I will go and look for Felicity,” Oliver explained. “Enjoy the rest of the day. I hope we will get the chance to talk some more later today.”

“That would be nice,” Raisa said with a smiled. Then she looked towards the beach. “Mrs. Felicity is bathing her feet I think.”

That being said, she let Tommy lead her away. Oliver stepped a little to the side, his eyes following where Raisa had looked before. Felicity was sitting on the landing stage, her feet dangling in the water and her face directed towards the sun. She was at least fifty feet away, but Oliver could still see how beautiful she was. He also didn’t miss how she looked like something was bothering her. She didn’t look as carefree as he was used to when she was just enjoying a moment of silence.

He had hoped that maybe the support he offered would be enough to make her feel better and ease the depression. He knew it didn’t work like that, but that didn’t mean that he couldn’t hope it did. He wanted Felicity to get better because he knew how much she suffered. It was almost like torture just watching it and knowing there was nothing he could do to help her when really he would give the world to take her pain away.

 

 

Felicity dangled her feet in the water, moving them back and forth slowly. She had just wanted to enjoy a moment of quiet and ease the pain in the balls of her feet a little bit. Apparently the little time she had been off from work and hadn’t worn high heels had been enough for her feet to get used to flat shoes.

Anyway, once she had sat in the quiet at the landing stage with her feet moving in the cool water and the sun shining into her face and warming her skin, she had figured how much she had needed this. The last three hours she had talked to so many people, thanking them for coming to the party and making small talk with them about nothing in particular, that she had needed this moment for herself.

When she felt her skin starting to tingle, making her hackles raise in a good way, Felicity smiled. She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that she had gotten company or even who this company was. She just knew deep in her bones whenever he was close around or even just watching her from afar. He felt the same way with her and it was about more than just his ninja skills or super-senses. It was corny but it was just that their souls were connected like that.

“Needed a timeout?” she asked, still not opening her eyes.

“Not exactly,” Oliver replied.

She could hear him slipping out of his shoes and stepping behind her. He sat down on the landing stage with his legs to each side of her, his feet playing with hers in the water. He scooted closer until he was sitting pressed to her back. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her back against him a little like she had earlier today before they had come here. Felicity’s head rolled against his shoulder with a sigh and Oliver ducked his head to first kiss her forehead, then the tip of her nose and finally her lips. Felicity opened up to him with a quiet sigh, lifting her hand and stroking her fingers through the short hair at the nape of his neck. When their lips parted, they nuzzled their noses and shared a smaller kiss before pulling apart just enough to look at each other without squinting.

“Not enjoying the party?” Felicity asked with a smile, knowing that he did enjoy the little party very well.

“I love it,” Oliver replied, his smile widening and his eyes filling with adoration. “I still can’t believe you have done all of this for me. How long have you been planning this?”

“For a while,” Felicity admitted, putting her hands to Oliver’s forearms against her chest and squeezing gently. He had the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, so she moved her fingers against his soft skin gently, enjoying the way it made goosebumps spread all over his skin. “I kind of made the decision last year around this time when I realized it would be ten years. Then I was pregnant with Millie and very horny, while you and your little friend were terribly enjoying and kind of useless-“

Oliver held his hand to his heart. “Ouch.”

“-so I was thinking about all the ways I could earn myself special sex, and started with the planning for this.”

Oliver chuckled and dropped a kiss to her shoulder. “You have been planning this for a whole year only to get sex?”

“Special sex,” Felicity corrected before she sighed. “And now I am not even feeling like sex at all.”

“We both know you don’t have to do anything to get special sex. You can special sex whenever you want it.”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “It’s not the same if it’s not for a special occasion.”

“I will make a list with all the ways you deserved special sex and we will catch up whenever you feel like it,” Oliver told her and rested his chin on her shoulder. “I wouldn’t want you to have planned this for nothing.”

Felicity chuckled, snuggling even closer to Oliver. He lifted his chin from her shoulder to kiss her forehead and lean his forehead against her temple. Felicity could feel his breath ghosting over her skin, eliciting goosebumps. She leaned her head back a little, so she had a better look at Oliver.

“You know why I really organized this?”

“What? The sex is not the real reason?” Oliver asked with a dramatic gasped for air. “I am shocked.”

Felicity smiled. “No, it’s not. I am just so grateful you came to my life and you make me so very happy and I don’t know if I tell you or show you that enough. I don’t ever want you to believe that I am taking you or what you have brought into my life for granted. I love you and I want you to know that I always love you, even if I am not able to just show it.”

“I know that, so please don’t worry about that. Just know that I love you, too, and I am here for you, whatever you need.” Oliver whispered. He tightened his arms around her and kissed her temple before he looked at her with worry in his deep blue eyes. Felicity closed her eyes, leaning her nose against his shoulder and breathed him in. “Are you okay?”

Felicity hesitated for a moment. She kept her eyes closed when she replied, “I thought I was getting better, but it doesn’t feel like that.”

“It takes time to get better. Don’t push yourself,” he whispered. He rocked her from side to side almost like he was trying to rock her to sleep. “You will get better with time. We just have to be patient.”

“I hate feeling like this.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered. “I wish I could take it away, but I know I can’t.”

“I know you would if you could,” Felicity replied. She took in another deep breath before she opened her eyes. “I’ve been thinking about something.”

“Shoot,” Oliver prompted gently.

“Maybe we should tell the others about the depression.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Everyone?”

“Well, our family and the team for now,” Felicity replied. “I think it might be better if they knew. You know, the last time Thea thought we were going to get divorced.”

Oliver nodded, snuggling his cheek against hers and rubbing his stubble against her soft skin. “What about telling your mother would end up in her being around too much?”

Felicity sighed. “I might have exaggerated a little, you know? I am sure if I tell her to not show up every day and give me some rest, she will respect that.”

“Yes, I am sure of that, too,” Oliver replied, “so if you want to do this, we will do this.”

Felicity nodded slightly. “You know there is another reason why I want the team to know.”

Oliver leaned his head a little closer, his arms tightening around her waist once more when he whispered, “You want to quit your work in the foundry?”

“Just… just for awhile,” Felicity told him quickly, not surprised that he knew already. Oliver just knew her that well. “You know, when this baby is born we might need help in the tech department anyway because even though I have mainly managed things from home these last years, with five kids that is going to be even crazier and-“

“Hey, you don’t need to explain yourself like that,” Oliver told her and kissed her cheek. “If that is what you want, we will do this. Do you already have an idea of who could replace you? Not that anyone could ever really replace you.”

“I do,” Felicity replied squeezing his forearms, “but let’s not talk about this today. Today is just for you and celebrating that you escaped hell and found your way back home. Speaking of, we should go back to the party.”

“Just five more minutes just us,” Oliver suggested, tightening his arms around her once more. “Okay?”

Felicity sighed, closing her eyes and snuggling back into Oliver’s embrace as much as possible. There was never enough time for just them, so she nodded. “Okay.”


	206. Here for you

“Here comes the dessert,” Oliver said in a happy singsong, putting the two bowls of homemade chocolate pudding with whipped cream on the dining table. “And I learned from the last family dinner’s mistake and figured it was better to have the double the dose of sugar which should be enough to get all of us into a sugar coma.”

“God, I love dessert and I don’t even have to fight Sara and Emmy over it which kind of makes it better… though… it’s only half of the joy when I don’t have to fight anyone over this. Why did they have to be invited to a slumber party tonight?” Roy asked, quickly pulling the first bowl closer and securing it to him. As soon as he put the first spoon between his lips, he added, “The next family dinner should be only chocolate pudding.”

“The next family dinner might be our wedding,” Thea told him, smiling at her fiancé happily, “only a few more months.”

“Hey, are you going to learn how to cook this well when we are getting married?” Roy asked her and pushed the next spoon of pudding into his mouth, “Because I feel I need to ask this of you. Every time after we have been here for dinner these last years I remembered what great cooking abilities there seem to be in your DNA. You definitely have to let those develop properly. You know, I pay for the cooking class if you let me.”

“Ever thought about that maybe you have to put some effort into learning it yourself, man?” John asked, clapping Roy’s shoulder with a chuckle, “Because I remember very clearly how Oliver has been spending long evenings with Lyla in the kitchen to learn cooking and I can tell you not only the kitchen looked like a mess after that.”

“Well, Roy, that would really be showing a lot of effort,” Donna said with a wide smile, preventing Millie from eagerly dipping her hands right into the pudding Quentin had just put into the small bowl in front of Donna, “but I guess not everyone can be as lucky as my Felicity.”

“Oh, I don’t-“

“My mama!” Tommy interrupted Roy, a deep frown showing on his forehead as he looked at his grandma. “My mama!”

“Yes, your mama but my Felicity,” Donna replied with a smile.

Tommy’s frown deepened. He shot a short look towards his mother, but Felicity was barely paying attention as she was staring into the empty air, her lips puckered and lost in thought. Oliver grabbed her hand under the tabletop and squeezed gently before lifting it to his lips and kissing the back of it. Immediately Felicity looked at him, her eyebrows perked up in silent question. Oliver nodded towards Tommy and Felicity followed his gaze.

“My mama!” Tommy repeated towards Donna.

“Yes, she’s your mommy,” Donna replied with a smile, “but she is my Felicity.”

Tommy looked everything but happy about the answer. He looked at his grandmother angrily. “My mama!”

Donna smiled, putting a hand to her heart. “And my Felicity.”

Tommy still didn’t seem to be happy about that answer at all. The little boy had had a rather grumpy day. Once Oliver had woken him this morning, Tommy had started grumbling and it hadn’t gotten better all day. With said grumpy day and the late hour the three-year-old didn’t seem to be much in the mood for a conversation like this. He pushed his bottom lip forward and crossed his arms in front of his small chest. Oliver already saw the tears welling in the young boys eyes and knew there wasn’t much missing for Tommy to start throwing a temper tantrum and Tommy threw quite the temper tantrums.

Quentin quickly leaned towards him, sensing Tommy’s growing frustration. “Should grandpa rave and rant with granny?”

“Yes,” Tommy said, taking in a sniffling breath. “She- She- My mama!”

“Yeah, she is your mama,” Quentin agreed before looking at Donna mockingly. “You hear that, Donna, she is his mama. Stop talking against him.”

Oliver watched with a smile on his face as the smile came back to Tommy’s face while Quentin was mockingly raving and ranting with Donna. Within half a minute all the frustration of before was forgotten. Tommy wiped the tears from his eyes, smiled and focused on the pudding Laurel had put in the bowl for him.

Felicity leaned back in her chair, a bowl with a bit of chocolate putting in her hands. Oliver watched her worriedly. She hadn’t eaten much lately and the fact that the morning sickness was at its worst right now wasn’t helping much either. He was relieved that at least she couldn’t reject the dessert. As much as he swore on healthy diet, he’d rather have her eat pure sugar than nothing at all.

Resting his arm over the back of her chair, he leaned a little closer and kissed her temple. Felicity turned her head and looked at him with an exhausted smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Everything alright?” he asked in a whisper.

“Yeah,” Felicity replied, leaning her head back against his arm with a sigh, “just a little nervous.”

Oliver stroked his hand through her hair, nodding his head. They had invited their family and closest friends to tell them about the pregnancy and the depression. Well, other than Quentin and Donna they already knew about the pregnancy and except for Roy and Thea everyone kind of knew about Felicity’s history with depression though at least Donna and Quentin didn’t know that it was back and Donna’s awareness of the past depression was much more of a strong suspicion than real knowledge. It was a big step to tell them, but Oliver felt it was the right thing to do especially since Felicity had been the one to suggest it. Everything that would make the situation easier for her was the right thing to do in his mind.

“I just wish we could get it over with.”

“Well, if that is what you want, we can arrange this,” Oliver whispered back and when Felicity just frowned at him he asked, “Do you want me to arrange that?”

“Kind of,” Felicity replied, biting down on her bottom lip.

Oliver nodded and kissed her forehead before he looked past her at Laurel. It didn’t take long for their friend to notice and she looked at him with perked up eyebrows, whispering an unheard ‘what?’. Oliver gave her a meaningful look and nodded towards the door. Immediately Laurel nodded.

“Tommy, how about we go upstairs and read a story together before we put Millie to bed?” she suggested. “You know with Emmy and Sara not being here, I could use your help. So what do you say?”

“The pudding?”

“Just take it upstairs,” she suggested and got up quickly.

Donna glanced at her watch. “Already bedtime?”

“Yeah, Millie hasn’t napped well this afternoon,” Oliver explained. “Thanks for taking care of them, Laurel.”

“Sure,” she replied with a short smile, helped Tommy from his chair and lifted Millie from Donna’s lap. “I love spending time with the kids.”

“If you need help-“

 “Oh, I am sure Laurel got it handled,” Oliver quickly interrupted his little sister.

“Absolutely,” Laurel assured. “Say goodnight, Tommy.”

“Good night,” Tommy repeated, waving with the spoon.

“Night, Buddy,” Felicity said. “Mommy’s coming upstairs and saying goodnight again later, okay?”

Tommy nodded, grabbing Laurel’s free hand and letting her lead him upstairs. As soon as the door fell shut behind them, Oliver saw Felicity releasing a deep breath. He pulled his arm away from the backrest of her chair and took her hand that was stroking up and down her thigh nervously. Lacing their fingers and holding her fingers between both of his hands. Felicity’s eyes met his and they shared a conversation that needed no spoken words. Felicity told him that she was nervous about dropping this bomb on their friends and Oliver assured her of his support.

When Oliver looked up, he found all their friends’ and family’s eyes on them. He quickly cleared his throat and stated, “Felicity and I have to tell you something.”

“Is something wrong?” Donna asked worriedly, holding out a hand for Quentin, who laced his fingers through hers and squeezed gently, wordlessly comforting his girlfriend in her worry.

“Uhm… it’s… it’s kind of serious, but-“

“I get the feeling this really is not something good,” Roy mumbled.

Thea frowned slightly. “Is something wrong with the baby?”

“What baby?” Donna’s answer came immediately. “Millie?”

Oliver watched his little sister rolling her lips into her mouth guiltily. Meanwhile Donna kept looking back and forth between Oliver and Felicity, not understanding what was going on. Oliver turned his head to look at Felicity, giving her the chance to explain. Since it was her health they wanted to talk about, he felt she should decide who should tell them.

“No, not Millie,” Felicity said slowly, her hand tightening around Oliver’s slightly. “I am pregnant… again.”

Donna’s eyes widened. She opened her lips in an attempt to speak, but seemed to be kind of speechless about this news. Holding a hand to her heart, she looked from Felicity to Oliver and to Felicity once more, still processing.

“And there is something wrong with the baby?” she asked.

“No,” Felicity hurried to say, shaking her head. “We’ve been to the doctor and the baby seems to be perfectly fine so far. I am only ten weeks along, so I am still a little cautious, but… yeah… so far the baby is fine.”

Oliver and Felicity had never been fond of telling people about pregnancy too soon. They had always kept it a secret until the second trimester when the pregnancy was a little safer. Better regretting telling them late than telling them too soon in case anything would go wrong!

“I’d congratulate you if you didn’t look like… I don’t know… Is there anything more?” Quentin asked.

Felicity opened her mouth to reply, but no sound came out. She gave it another try, and when again no same came out, she looked at Oliver, quietly asking for his help. Oliver gave her a short nod, squeezing her hand.

“Felicity is depressive,” Oliver explained.

He watched the reactions of their loved ones. Roy just frowned, blinking repeatedly, while Thea’s eyes widened in shock as she stared at Felicity. Donna and Quentin were holding onto each other’s hands, giving each other support. In both of their eyes, as well as in Lyla’s and John’s was worry but also a lot of love.

Oliver turned his head to Felicity, who was looking at him already. She took in a deep breath before she looked at the others and explained, “It- I- This pregnancy came very much unexpected for us. We thought after Millie our family was completed, so this cupcake here really took us by surprise us which might also explain why I am still feeling so overwhelmed with this. Anyway, that is a factor that probably played into the development of the depression as well as my history with it.”

Roy frowned. “History?”

“I didn’t know you have a history with depression,” Thea added.

“I have been depressive during the first weeks of pregnancy with Tommy, too.”

“You were…?” Thea started, frowning. “I thought you two were going to get divorced at that time. Instead you told me you were having another baby.”

Felicity nodded. “We didn’t know what was going on with me immediately at that time. It was only when it was already getting better and I told Lyla about it that we went to a doctor and it was a quite troublesome time for both of us and…”

When Felicity looked at Oliver, he smiled encouragingly at her and continued, “We had a rough time back then because we didn’t know what was going on. We do know now, though, and we are taking step by step to get through this.”

Thea frowned. “But why didn’t you tell us? We could have helped… somehow.”

“Lyla helped us,” Felicity explained, “and that really was all the help we needed.”

“You know, I am still here for you,” Lyla said.

“We know that and really we are grateful for that,” Felicity told her friend quickly, “but you have your own baby to look forward to and-“

“That doesn’t make it impossible for me to help you, though,” Lyla assured.

“Lyla is right,” John supported his wife’s words. “You don’t have to go through this alone.”

“We aren’t going through this alone,” Felicity replied. “Laurel spends a lot of time here to make sure I get all the rest I need and… we kind of got it handled… we just wanted to tell you because… because it felt right and I think you should know. There is just nothing you can do other than being really patient with me and… yeah… letting me rest.”

For a long time nobody said a word. Lyla looked into the faces of the others before she cleared her throat.

“I am sure I am speaking for everyone here when I tell you that we respect your wishes because we love you and we want you to be better,” she said quietly, “but if you ever need someone, we are all here for you.”

The others nodded in agreement, telling them the same.

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered, obviously touched by this. She took in a deep breath, tears welling in her eyes. “I think I need a moment to…”

She gestured around her face, and squeezed Oliver’s hand before she headed towards the bathroom. Oliver looked after her, taking in a deep breath and releasing it with a sigh.

“Are you alright, man?” Quentin asked.

“Yes,” Oliver replied, sighing once more. “I am good or at least better than… well… I don’t know. I think so far Felicity and I really got this handled. It’s not easy, but we are open about it and leaning on each other and I think that makes it a little easier for both of us to handle this situation this time.”

“I remember how hard it has been on you, too, during the pregnancy with Tommy,” Donna said. She reached out her hands for Oliver and he put it into hers. “We are all here for you two.”

“Is… is Felicity okay?” Thea asked, looking towards the door. “She looked… exhausted. I… have no idea how she is feeling, but… it has to be so hard and… I wish I could do something for her and…”

“Felicity knows that you want to help her, Thea. She knows that all of you want to help her,” Oliver explained, “but what Felicity wants right now is to rest. She needs time and room and… just give her a little room until she comes to you please. She… if she feels overwhelmed or pushed it will only make it worse. That is what happened the last time and what caused us to drift so far apart. She has Laurel and Laurel emits just the calmness Felicity needs right now.”

“But you let us know when there is anything we can do, right?” Roy asked.

“Yes, I promise,” Oliver said with a nod. He glanced towards the door and puckered his lips. “I’ll be back in a second. I just gotta check on Felicity.”

He quickly got up and walked towards the bathroom. He took some deep breaths to shake the feeling Oliver didn’t know how to describe that he had been left with after this talk. If he was feeling like this, he knew Felicity had to be even more… shaken. He stepped in front of the bathroom door and hesitated for a moment before knocking softy.

“Felicity?” he said softly. “It’s me.”

“Come in. The door is open.”

Oliver opened the door and went inside. Felicity was sitting on the closed toilet lid and was holding a wet washcloth to her face.

“Hey,” Oliver said with a gently smile on his lips. He crouched down in front of her, putting his hand to her thighs and stroking up and down gently. “Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “I am just a little… this was a lot.”

Oliver nodded. “I know. Everyone repeated that they are always here for you, but I told them to give you room and wait until you come to them.”

Felicity smiled tiredly, leaning her forehead against Oliver’s. “Thank you.”

“Always,” Oliver replied and tugged a strand of her hair behind her ear. “You okay?”

“As okay as I can be, I guess,” Felicity said with a sigh. “I am glad we told them and the cat is now out of the bag.”

“Yeah, me too,” Oliver said honestly. “I think this was an important step.”

“Yes, absolutely,” Felicity agreed.

“Did you talk to Curtis yet?”

“I am meeting him tomorrow,” Felicity explained, “that is if the others agree with this. I hope I will get to catch them without my mom for a moment later.”

“Don’t worry,” Oliver replied with a grin. “I gave Tommy a chocolate bar to have him ask for his granny all the time while being put to bed.”

Felicity released a breathy chuckle. “You are impossible.”

“Hey, anything for you,” Oliver replied honestly. He straightened up a bit and kissed Felicity softly. “I love you.”

Felicity sighed, resting her forehead against Oliver and nuzzling his nose. “I love you, too.”

 

 

Felicity tapped her fingers on the bar counter nervously. She hated waiting. It was always the worst part for her. Once the situation had begun she could concentrate on getting through it. As long as she had to wait for it, her mind kept her occupied with a thousand different scenarios of what could happen.

Once Laurel had come back downstairs yesterday, she had asked Donna to go to Tommy and check for him. As soon as Donna had left, honored that her little baby boy had been asking for her, Felicity had told the others that she wanted to take a break from her work at the Arrow cave. She felt like the smallest things sucked all energy out of her. It was why she had already taken a break from her work at QI. Her work in the Arrow cave was one more thing she would have to take a break from, at least for now. Everyone had been incredibly understanding. They had immediately agreed to let Felicity tell Curtis about their secret and ask him to take her place for a while and share it with her once she was feeling better.

Felicity had been working with Curtis for years now. She liked him and she trusted him. He was also really good at what he was doing, so she was positive that she could put the team’s lives into his hands and not coming to regret it later.

“Wow!”

Felicity flinched slightly, quickly turning on her seat to watch Curtis stroll towards her with his hands pushed into the pocket of his pants. He was looking around the empty club with wide eyes, turning around himself to take in every inch of Verdant.

“I have been here a few times to party,” Curtis explained, “but I have never seen the club like this. It’s kind of impressive and a really weird place to meet my boss, who let her husband replace her from one day to the other without any warning and that at… eleven p.m. on a Wednesday.”

“Hi, Curtis,” Felicity said, sliding down from her barstool and hugging her coworker who she had grown quite fond of and who was now her friend. “Thanks for meeting me here.”

“Yeah, sure,” Curtis said with a chuckle, “though it’s still weird. I mean…  I don’t even know where to start… Where have you been?”

“I’m… I’m not so good right now,” Felicity explained carefully, biting down on her bottom lip nervously. She tried to push her hands into her pockets only to remember that her dress didn’t have any, so she wrapped her arms around her body instead. “I am… uhm… I am pregnant and have a prenatal depression.”

“Oh, wow.”

“Yeah, quite a bit to swallow, huh?” she asked and sighed. Maybe she should have put a little more thought into how to tell him without throwing it right into his face. “That is why I haven’t been at work and why Oliver replaced me.”

Curtis nodded slowly. “Wow. Can’t be easy for you.”

“It isn’t,” Felicity confirmed. “And that is why I have to ask you for something that is… kind of huge…”

“I’ll do it,” Curtis said immediately. “You are the coolest boss I ever had and I kind of what you back, so I’ll do whatever you want me to do or need me to do to feel better.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “You can still change your mind. Better keep that in mind.”

“Okay,” Curtis replied, frowning slightly.

Felicity looked at him for a moment longer, biting down on her bottom lip. Then she nodded her head towards the back of the club, leading the way. Curtis followed her quietly though she could almost hear him thinking as he was walking close behind her. Felicity took deep breaths, reminding herself to stay calm. She had thought this decision through thoroughly. She was sure it was the right decision to make.

When they arrived in front of the door that would lead them down to the Arrow cave, Felicity stopped. She took in a deep breath and turned around to Curtis. He looked at her with a frown, probably not knowing what was going on.

“Okay, what I am going to show you demands absolute secrecy,” Felicity told him firmly. “This really means a lot to me and to a lot of people close to me, so I hope I can trust you with this.”

Curtis chuckled. “You know when I first met you I thought Oliver was the Arrow. If you had said that to me back then, I would have certainly thought you would show me your secret hide-out now. That would be so cool… and now I have set the bar so high and will probably disappointed. Don’t worry. I’ll do my best to hide it and be excited about whatever you will show me.”

Felicity opened her mouth to reply, but she really didn’t know what to say to that. Curtis was just so… Curtis. Shaking her head, she typed in the code to unlock the steel door. She opened it and went ahead, leading Curtis down the long metal stairs. She walked right to her work station before she turned around to look at her friend. Curtis took in the lair like he had taken in the club before, only that his eyes seemed even wider.

“What is this?” Curtis asked.

“This is the super-secret hide-out from where Team Arrow is operating. This is basically my place in the team and I have to ask you to replace me here for awhile because I can’t do it right now and you are the only person I know who holds the abilities to do this as well as my trust. I am putting the lives of my family into your hands here.”

Curtis nodded, still staring at her. “Nobody will believe this when I tell them.”

“Which is probably a good thing because you can’t tell anyone,” Felicity told him. “Really, Curtis, this has to be a secret.”

He nodded. “Okay. Nobody will know.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered, releasing a deep breath she didn’t know she had been holding. “So will you do this?”

“I don’t know,” Curtis replied, frowning despite the excited smile on his lips. “Is the rest of this team okay with that? And who are they?”

“Oliver and Thea, Roy Harper, John Diggle and Laurel Lance,” Felicity replied.

“Oliver as in…?”

“My Oliver, yes,” Felicity replied, nodding her head, “and his baby sister Thea.”

“I knew it,” Curtis said to himself. “It only makes him hotter.”

Felicity crossed her arms in front of her chest, cocking her head. “Continue like this and you will be kicked out of the team again before you even participated in your first mission.”

Quickly Curtis lifted his hands. “Your Oliver. Got it.”

“Better don’t forget it,” Felicity mumbled before she cocked her head. “So are you doing this?”

Curtis took in a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. Felicity knew that he needed to think about this carefully because this wasn’t a small thing. This was a goddamn hard decision to make and he should consider it carefully. Felicity would have probably trusted him a little less if he wouldn’t be taking his time to think about it.

Eventually Curtis opened his eyes and looked directly at her, nodding his head. “I’m in.”

Felicity held out her hand for Curtis and he took it, shaking it.

“I am glad that you do,” Felicity replied. “I will break you in now.”

“Alright, I am ready,” Curtis said, rubbing his hands.

“So this is where I am leading the missions.”

“I will lead the missions, so cool!” Curtis said, quickly getting a hold on his excitement when Felicity shot him a short look. “Do I need a mask? And a codename?”

“First of all, you don’t need either of that yet. Well, you won’t ever need a mask I guess, but you also won’t need a codename right now. Maybe one day. More importantly, _you_ will not lead the missions,” Felicity told him.

Curtis frowned. “But you just said-“

“I will just quote… no, not the right word because he didn’t say it yet… he will say it, so maybe forward-quote… no…” Felicity shook her head. “Anyway, Oliver will probably tell you that you are not leading any missions because the main reason I get to do that is because I have his full trust and I am his life partner, his partner in really everything life-related.”

“Got it.” Curtis nodded. “When will I get to know them? I mean… now that I know?”

“I’d say in three, two, one-“

Felicity gestured to the back of the lair where the doors opened and the whole team came in. She had sent all of them out tonight to catch a guy who had tried – and miserably failed – to kill three women in the past week.

“Oh wow,” Curtis said.

Felicity could see that he had trouble to get a hold on his excitement. It really seemed to cost him a lot of effort so that he wasn’t squealing like a teenage girl when he was shaking all the vigilantes’ hands and said their names like he had just now really realized that what Felicity had told them was true.

“I am so excited to join this,” Curtis told Oliver, shaking his hand vehemently. “I am a huge fan of what you did for this city, so I will do my best to support this. I also swear I will give my best and lead these missions as well as I am able to.”

Oliver pulled his hand back and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “You won’t get to lead the missions unless you gain all my trust and become my life partner, my partner in everything life-related really.”

“Don’t get his hopes up,” Felicity mumbled.

“Exact same wording,” Curtis said, looking from Oliver to Felicity and back. “That’s synchronicity as it finest. Synchrolicity.”

 Felicity frowned cocking her head. “Huh?”

“Oh, Synchrolicity like, you know, the Olicity-version of synchronicity.”

Felicity only cocked her head more.”

“Olicity as in Oliver and Felicity fused together. Your shipper name and-“

“I am heading under the shower,” Oliver said. He pecked Felicity’s lips shortly before he asked, “You’re okay?”

Felicity nodded. “Kind of feeling like I can really breathe for the first time in a long time.”

Oliver smiled at her and stroked his fingers over her cheek gently. He kissed her shortly once more before he turned around and followed the others towards the shower. Felicity looked after him and only turned her eyes away when Curtis sighed.

He puckered his lips and mumbled, “You make it so hard to try stealing him from you.”

Felicity crossed her arms in front of her chest, cocking her head at her friend. “Curtis, my depression sucks up most of my energy, but trust me when I tell you that I will never have too little energy to kick the ass of whoever would try to steal my husband from me.”

Curtis nodded quickly. “Got it.”

Felicity took in a deep breath and sighed before she nodded towards the work station. “Come on, I’ll show you everything now.”

As she turned towards the computers Felicity felt like maybe focusing her life solely on her family was going to help her feeling better. She didn’t feel as suffocated by her emptiness and exhaustion right now as she had a few hours ago. Maybe everything she was doing was already helping. Maybe the depression would cease sooner than she had hoped.


	207. A second of forgetting

How could she have hoped that the depression was ceasing already? She had felt a little bit better, a little less burdened and she had just thought that this had to mean that she was getting better and the depression was fading already. She had been so stupid about it! Really, really stupid!

Felicity shook her head, resting it on her arm on the countertop. She had hoped that easing her life by just getting rid of everything that had the power to stress her out – her work at QI as well as her work in the bunker and admittedly part of the housework too – would help her feeling better. She had hoped that taking time for herself and getting some rest would help her. It didn’t, though. She wasn’t feeling better or even less exhausted from the smallest everyday-activities. She didn’t feel any joy thinking about getting her fingers on a computer and hack into whatever database she could find. She just felt like she had been running a marathon a week ago and hadn’t slept since and she hated it.

Sighing, Felicity glanced at her watch. Usually this was the time that Oliver dragged her out to go out for a walk with him and the kids. Since Emmy and Tommy were both sick with a terrible cold, though, Felicity suggested that the walk would be canceled for the foreseeable time. It also meant that she had time to do stuff now, just that there was nothing Felicity could really motivate herself to do.

It was weird, but Felicity was kind of bored but she also had no idea what she could do that she would have fun doing, either. She had just decided to lie down on the couch and check if there was anything on TV she could spend some time with when she heard Oliver coming downstairs, so she just straightened up on the bar stool and waited for him to come to the kitchen.

“How are our germ spreaders doing?” she asked with an attempt of a cheerful tone that was actually kind of weak.

“A little better but still not really well,” Oliver replied with a sigh. He walked right over to the sink and washed his hands carefully. Looking back over his shoulder at her, he said, “Their fever is slowly going down, so I hope the worst of it will be past us by the end of the day.”

Felicity nodded. “Good. Anything I can do to help?”

Oliver turned off the water and grabbed the towel from the counter next to it. Drying his hands, he approached Felicity until he stood right next to her. He threw the towel back over his shoulder, framed her face with his hands and kissed her forehead gently. Felicity sighed, wrapping her hands around his wrists to keep his hands where they were and closing her eyes. When Oliver bent her head back a little again, Felicity opened her eyes, finding his already on her. 

“I’d rather have you not close to them for too long yet,” he explained. “The worst that could happen now is you and/or Millie becoming sick, too.”

Again Felicity nodded. “Yes, I guess so.”

Oliver stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones gently and Felicity sighed, giving him a sad smile. She wasn’t happy that she had to keep her distance, but she also knew that it was the smarter thing to do. She had lost like five pounds in the last weeks already. Getting sick and giving even more trouble to her health certainly wasn’t a smart idea. 

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before correcting, “Or at least as close to okay as you possibly could be?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I guess I am. I am just… really… I don’t know… exhausted I guess. And kind of bored I think.”

“Maybe you should go out and take a little walk,” Oliver suggested with a short look outside. “The weather is pleasant, not too warm and not too cold, and getting some fresh air might help with the tiredness a little.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose and shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.”

Oliver puckered his lips. “You could also rearrange our movie collection. You said a while ago it was a complete chaos and I know how much you love some good order.”

“I don’t know,” Felicity just said once more, releasing a sigh.

“Or you could try to finish the puzzle Emmy and I started last week because I think we got stuck on that one.”

Felicity looked at Oliver for a moment before she said, “I am worse than the kids when they are bored and don’t know what to do, right?”

Oliver only frowned slightly, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. When Felicity sighed once more and closed her eyes again, he learned his forehead against hers, offering silent comfort. Felicity knew that she could fully lean on him and that really made the depression this time much more bearable. The fact that they both knew what was going on with her and that they both accepted that this was a sickness and not something she had to be ashamed of or feel guilty for was helping. Having Oliver here was helping. She just… Felicity knew that she didn’t have to pretend with him. No matter what she’d do, Oliver wouldn’t blame her or tell her to just pull herself the hell together.

Opening her eyes with a quiet sigh, she pecked Oliver’s lips shortly before she said, “I think I am going to cook chicken soup. It will be good for the kids and actually I think I’d like some, too.”

“Sounds great,” Oliver replied with a smile. “I fear you have to head to the supermarket, though. I would do it, but-“

“Daddy!” Tommy’s cry came from the upper floor.

“Yeah, you are needed here,” Felicity told him, rubbing her hand over his chest gently. “Besides, it won’t hurt me if I go out a little, right?”

“Probably not,” Oliver replied and kissed the tip of her nose. “I’ll go check on Tommy.”

Felicity nodded. “I’ll write my grocery list and head out.”

“Alright.” Oliver turned around and was almost halfway out of the door when he turned around to her once more. “Would you mind taking Millie with you? I think she could use a little trip.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “I’ll come upstairs and get her before I leave.”

“Have fun,” Oliver told her and hurried upstairs when Tommy called for him once more. 

Felicity grabbed a small notepad and a pen and started to write down everything she would have to buy to cook the chicken soup. Cooking really felt like a good idea. She hadn’t done it in awhile since Oliver usually did the cooking and Laurel had ordered takeout these last days when she had been here. It felt like a good idea doing it today and the little shopping trip with Millie was probably going to be a lot of fun, too.

  


Oliver kissed Tommy’s warm forehead and pulled the blanket a little higher on his son’s body. The boy had fallen asleep and, though Oliver knew that it was going to mess up his sleep pattern, he didn’t mind it. The fever had exhausted the three-year-old and he should use the sleep to rest a little. Oliver could still wake him later to make sure he was eating something before the night would come.

As he left Tommy’s room, Oliver turned on the special lights that mimicked the stars at the sky. He was sure when Tommy woke up, it was going to help him seeing these lights. Since they had installed them a few weeks after Millie’s birth, Tommy had only grown to love them more each day. The comforted him when he was sad and they calmed him down when something had unsettled him. Tommy wanted to become a doctor rather than an astrophysicist by now, but he still loved seeing the stars a lot. 

Maybe one day soon Oliver was going to take his family to the astronomical observatory once more. They could need a little quality family time. Besides, once the new baby was going to be born, their lives would be turned upside down once more.

Smiling softly, Oliver closed the door behind him and headed over to Emmy’s room. He heard soft voices coming from the inside and opened the door to find her curled under her blanket, using her pink giraffe as a pillow, while she was listening to an audio version of Frozen. Actually, she wasn’t just listening but spoke along to the voices with quiet and raspy voice.

“Everything alright here, Sweetie?” he asked softly.

Emmy opened her eyes, smiling at him tiredly. “I am good, Daddy.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered. “I am going to go downstairs. I think I heard mommy coming home a few minutes ago. She wants to make her special chicken soup, so you and Tommy get better soon. I’ll check if I can help her. Just call me if you need me, okay?”

Emmy nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered back, winking at her. 

Oliver closed the door and strolled downstairs. He had taken the day off to take care of the kids because Laurel had to work and the last thing he wanted for Felicity was to get sick or feel overwhelmed. Taking care of sick children was always exhausting. He wasn’t ashamed admitting that he felt tired and exhausted after this day. Since basic everyday-activities were exhausting her more than long nights in the Arrow Cave after an even longer day of work usually exhausted her, Oliver had felt like leaving her alone with two sick kids would have been a bad idea. Besides, she was losing weight as it was. He didn’t want it to get worse by getting her sick, too. What Felicity needed was rest.

So far he and Felicity had managed to handle this depression okay he felt. Felicity had told him what she felt she needed to get better and Oliver had helped her to implement her wishes. He wished he could do more for her, but he knew he couldn’t. He accepted that, even if only hardly, and he did what he could do and what she let him do for her. They were leaning on each other with their wishes and needs. They were in this together, much more than they had been the last time. 

Stepping forward, Oliver leaned into the frame of the door and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He watched Felicity quietly. She had her cookbook opened, reading the recipe while putting her hair into a high ponytail. Once her hair was out of her face, she turned around to the bag of groceries and her eyes found his.

“Hey,” she said with an exhausted smile that didn’t make her eyes shine as much as it was supposed to, but yet reached them at least. A lot of her smiles these past weeks had failed to do so.

“Hi,” Oliver replied with a smile of his own. “You look a little bit better than before.”

“Yeah.” Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Going out to shop groceries and get a little bit of fresh air from the way of the car to the grocery story really didn’t hurt.”

Oliver smiled. “I guess it didn’t.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment longer, getting the groceries from the bag. When she rumbled the paper, she asked him, “Are the kids okay?”

“Yes, they are really getting better. Tommy is sleeping and Emmy listens to Frozen. She is excited for the soup.”

“I better get started then,” Felicity replied, waving with the leek. “How about you lie down? You look exhausted. You’re not getting sick, too, right?”

“No,” Oliver replied. “You know me. I don’t ever get sick. I am really just a little bit exhausted.”

“Well, then better nap a little as long as the kids don’t need you.”

“I was actually wondering if you need help chopping or something.”

“I’m good. I’ll tell you if I need help,” Felicity told him. “Better lie down. One sick kid is exhausting. Two sick kids are a nightmare. Two sick kids and a sick daddy…”

Oliver nodded slowly. “Okay. I’ll lie down in the living room.”

He smiled at her for a moment longer before he turned around and headed into the living room. He really felt like lying down and napping for only a few minutes. After going back and forth between Emmy’s and Tommy’s rooms, making sure they had everything they needed and everything he knew would make them feel better. It had left him heavy-legged and tired. He would just lie down on the couch with Millie and close his eyes for like five minutes. That would be enough to make him feel better.

“Who’s in for some good cuddle with daddy?” Oliver asked. “Because daddy could really use some-“

When Oliver looked into the small crib they had downstairs for Millie and found it empty, he frowned. He hadn’t heard Felicity coming upstairs to take Millie there and he hadn’t seen her in the kitchen, either. He went into the entrance hall, checking if Millie was lying in her baby carriage because sometimes she could sleep better there, but again he only found it empty. Shaking his head slightly, he went back to the kitchen.

“Restless?” Felicity asked, looking up from the leek she was chopping. 

“I wanted to cuddle with Millie, but I can’t find her.”

Felicity frowned. “She’s in her crib in the living room where she is supposed to be. She fell asleep on the way back, so I-“

“She’s not in her crib,” Oliver interrupted her, shaking his head. “I checked. She’s not there and she’s not in her carriage, either, so-“

When the knife slid from Felicity’s fingers, landing on the kitchen counter with a loud clatter, and her face became pale, Oliver stopped. His stomach dropped and he felt his heart skipping a few beats before it started racing in his chest, pounding against his ribs fiercely. He forced himself to take in a deep breath and get a handle on the feeling of panic in his chest, but he had trouble to manage the overwhelming feelings that were crushing down on him.

“Felicity,” he said, troubling with trying to keep his voice calm, “where is Millie?”

“I-… uhm… I-… I-… I think-… she-“

Oliver quickly crossed the distance to her, framing her face with his hands firmly and looked into her eyes. He could see the panic in them and was actually sure it was mirrored in his. Her face became even paler. 

“Felicity,” he started once more, “where is Millie?”

Felicity just looked at him for what were probably just two seconds but felt forever. A thousand different scenarios were running through Oliver’s mind as he wondered where his baby girl was and if she was alright. Felicity’s voice was barely louder than a whisper when she replied, “I think she’s still in the car.”

Oliver didn’t waste a second. He turned around and ran outside, grabbing the car keys on the way and quickly unlocking the car doors. As soon as he opened them, he felt a heavy weight being lifted from his chest. Millie was sitting in her car seat, squealing happily as she was stretching her arms and legs out for him.

“Hi, Sweetie,” Oliver said with a chuckle as most of his panic fell off him. He made quick work of the safety belts and lifted Millie into his arms, kissing her cheek. “Did you play hide and seek with daddy without telling him?”

The seven months old baby squealed once more, slapping her little hands against his face lightly. Oliver kissed her forehead and checked her for any signs that she wasn’t okay, but Millie seemed to be perfectly alright. Given that the weather was kind of pleasant, not cold but not too warm either, he guessed that she had been quite lucky.

“God, daddy’s so happy you are alright,” he whispered, cradling Millie to his chest and peppering her face with little kisses, making the baby squeal happily once more.

Oliver closed his eyes, leaning his nose against Millie’s head and breathing in the scent of her skin. Millie was okay. Nothing had happened. She had been alone in the car for less than ten minutes and the weather was not too hot or too cold for her to be outside. The car had also been locked, so nobody could have taken hr. Millie was fine. Nothing had happened to her. He repeated the words in his mind over and over again, waiting for them to settle in and for the panic that had risen so quickly to finally cease completely.

“Should daddy get you some chocolate pudding?” Oliver whispered into Millie’s ear. “Come on, daddy-“

When Oliver opened his eyes, taking the first step back to the house, he saw Felicity standing in the frame of the door. She was still pale. Tears were welling in her eyes. She was trembling though her arms were wrapped around herself firmly like she was trying to keep herself from falling apart. 

“Is she alright?” Felicity asked, her voice trembling as much as her body. 

“She’s okay,” Oliver assured her, nodding his head. “Let’s just take her inside and get her something to eat and to drink.”

Felicity nodded, taking in a deep breath. “I’ll do that.”

She reached out her hands to take Millie from him and-

Oliver couldn’t say what it was or why it happened, but for some reason instead of holding Millie to Felicity like he should do, his arms tightened around their baby protectively. It was only a second and it happened without Oliver’s intent, but it did happen nonetheless. He held her more firmly to him like he was protecting her from being taken from him.

“Of course you-“ 

Oliver quickly held out Millie for Felicity to take her, knowing that she would never hurt their daughter and that she needed to hold her and keep her close to her now after what had just happened. Instead of taking her from him, though, she took a step back, crossing her arms in front of her chest and hunching her shoulders. Her eyes were focused on Millie, who was reaching out her arms for her mother demandingly. Instead of taking the baby, though, Felicity just took another step back, bringing more distance between them. 

“I… uhm… I gotta lie down,” Felicity whispered breathlessly. “You can make the soup for the kids. You know the recipe and the cookbook is in the kitchen and… I’m sorry.”

“Felicity.”

His voice was barely louder than a breath but he was sure even if it had been, Felicity wouldn’t have heard him. Her arms wrapped around herself tightly, she was already running upstairs. She was taking in sniffling breaths, her body trembling even more than before now.

Oliver squeezed his eyes shut, tearing his hair and hissing a quiet, “Fuck.”

Why couldn’t things for one go smoothly? Hadn’t his family been through enough already? Couldn’t they catch a break for once? Did it always have to become worse when it looked like it was getting better?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not sure yet when I will update next. I have three chapters saved, but I will go on vacation for a week soon, so there won't be any time to write. I guess I am going to just post when I have time and feel like it. As soon as I get back to writing and I can promise you regular updates again, I will inform you about when to expect the next updates. I am trying not to make you wait too long for the update on this. 
> 
> By the way, please note that what happened really didn't hurt Millie! All the talk about the weather being okay and Millie being okay was meant to show that what happened of course shocked both of them in a way, but it turned out okay.  
> I also read a few things about "forgetting" your children and I read it happens a whole lot more often than you think. Sometimes we just follow routines and forget things like that. You have no idea how many times my dad was supposed to drive me to university and I was sitting on the passenger seat, going through some homework, and he drove to his workplace nonetheless, simply because it's routine.  
> We will see how Oliver and Felicity deal with this in the next chapter. The thing is that this storyline is a lot more up and down. There is a lot understanding between them and that is what always helps them. 
> 
> PS: I have no idea where this ramble came from...


	208. Heart to heart

She had gotten the groceries into the trunk and fastened Millie’s car seat on the back-seat. Then she had gotten in the car, put on her own seatbelt and directed the car from the parking lot in front of the supermarket. She had talked to Millie on the way back, softly whispering words to her to lull the baby to sleep. When a guy had ignored her right of way, she had hissed and mumbled curse words to herself. Then she had continued her way to her home, parked the car in front of the garage and-

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut, forcing herself to remember every detail of what she had done after that. She was sure that the first thing she had done was to get Millie from the car and take her into the living room _before_ she had gotten the groceries and started preparing the soup. She wouldn’t forget her daughter!

But obviously she had. She had forgotten her because otherwise Oliver would have found her in the crib in the living room when he had wanted to lie down and he wouldn’t have found her in the car instead. Where she had left her.

Since this had happened five days ago, Felicity had been trying to remember every detail of what had happened between leaving the supermarket and Oliver coming into the kitchen to ask her where Millie was. She remembered most of the drive back home and how she had talked to Millie, but she couldn’t remember what had happened or what she had been thinking that she had forgotten to take Millie into the house. She just couldn’t remember what had happened that had made her forget her.

When Millie started crying, Felicity already moved to get up from the couch and get the little girl from where she was lying on her playground blanket. She hadn’t even gotten up on her feet yet when she remembered the way Oliver had held Millie to himself protectively after he had gotten her out of the car. She knew that he hadn’t meant any bad. She had seen the regret in his eyes after his reaction, but Felicity couldn’t get rid of the feeling that he was right. Oliver had good instincts and what parent with good instincts would leave their kid with a person who had forgotten her own child in a car? No good parent probably.

Looking at Millie, who was crying and kicking with her legs strongly, Felicity leaned back on the couch. She couldn’t take her and risk hurting her again. She had never thought she would hurt one of her children, but she had. Millie hadn’t been left with any bruises or whatever, but that was only because she had been lucky. If anything had happened to her-

“Millie’s crying,” Laurel said gently when she stepped into the living room, cocking her head at Felicity. She lifted the baby into her arms without hesitation and wiped her finger over Millie’s rosy cheek to dry the tears, but she had struggle keeping Millie steady on her hip since the young girl was holding out her hands for her mommy. Laurel smiled. “You want to mommy, right? Come on, let’s-“

When Laurel took a step towards Felicity, intending to hand the crying baby over, Felicity got up quickly and walked around the couch table to bring some distance between her and Millie. She crossed her arms in front of her chest protectively, looking at her youngest baby girl. She missed holding her. She needed to hold her and she needed to whisper into her ear how sorry she was about what had happened and about how she had hurt her, but Felicity couldn’t. She was too scared about hurting her again.

“Felicity, is this still about what happened last week because-“

“No,” Felicity lied quickly, wrapping her arms around herself even more tightly. “No, it’s not. I am just- I am just really tired and- and I will go upstairs and lie down a little. Just calm her down. I know you’ve got it handled.”

Not giving Laurel the opportunity to say anything more or to look right through to her lie as Felicity was sure her friend already did, she hurried outside of the living room and almost ran upstairs. She really needed to be alone and somewhere far away from Millie, so Felicity closed the bedroom door behind her crawled into her bed. She sat down against the headboard, wrapping her arms around her legs and rocking herself back and forth slowly.

Felicity knew that mistakes could happen. Oliver hadn’t paid attention for a moment while changing Emmy’s diaper years ago, and the little girl had rolled from the changing table. She hadn’t blamed him because things like that could happen. You weren’t paying attention for a second and something bad happened. It didn’t make you a bad parent.

Actually, that was exactly what she had told Oliver back then and it had all made sense. She had believed that it was true and she had convinced him of it. It seemed to be something completely different now that she was the one who had failed their baby. She didn’t feel like it is something that just could have happened. There should never be a second that you forgot about your kids.

She also knew that Millie hadn’t gotten badly hurt. She hadn’t gotten hurt at all really. She hadn’t even been particularly unhappy with the situation. Millie was the easiest baby in the whole world to please. She barely ever got unhappy or grumpy enough to make it heard with her cried. When Emmy and Tommy had been her age, they had probably already made half of the street pay attention to them being left alone in a car if she had forgotten either of them.

Yet Felicity felt terrible because of all the things she knew could have happened.

Grabbing Oliver’s pillow from her side of the bed, she tugged it between her chest and her legs and she buried her face in the pillow. Tears were running down her cheeks and Felicity had to press her hand to her lips to contain a sob.

Last time the depression has gotten in the way of her happy marriage with Oliver. She had turned into a fury, letting out all her anger and the entire chaos of her feelings on him. This time it was different. She wasn’t as angry as she was the last time. She was just tired and exhausted all the time and there was absolutely nothing that she felt could cheer her up for longer than like five seconds, but now the depression was also affecting her ability to be a good mother it seemed and that felt even more unbearable.

Felicity stroked her hand over her lower stomach where a small baby bump was already showing at eleven weeks now. It wasn’t fair that she lost her ability to be a good mother because she was becoming a mother once more. It was life’s cruelest irony actually.

How the hell was this supposed to go on? How much longer was she supposed to feel like this and how much more of herself would she lose in the process?

 

 

Oliver kicked the door shut behind him, dropping the keys into the small bowl on the table next to it and rubbing his hands over his face. He had been supposed to be back home two hours ago, but then he had had to have this conference call late and called home to tell Felicity and Laurel that he wouldn’t make it in time to put the kids to bed. Putting the kids to bed was probably what was getting him through most of the days at Queen Incorporated.

He hated working there again. He had been spoiled with spending his entire day with the kids for almost three years now and he had gotten so wonderfully used to it that he really hadn’t wanted to change it. Of course there hadn’t really been a choice for him to make because the truth was that the one thing he wanted even less than working at QI was to put Felicity through working there when obviously she had trouble to get through the smallest everyday-activities without feeling completely exhausted. Felicity and her health were always and forever going to be his priority.

He was working on something that would hopefully allow him to spend more time at home and help Felicity through it more than he could right now. He did what he could or at least that was what he was telling himself. It didn’t feel like it was enough and while he could deal with that usually, it was harder after what had happened a few days ago.

Oliver didn’t even have to really decide thinking about it, but the memory just snuck itself into his head whenever he didn’t actively push it away. He remembered his panic when he had hadn’t known where Millie was and he remembered the hurt in Felicity’s face when instead of handing their daughter over to her, his arms had tightened around her protectively like he didn’t trust her around Millie and he would have to protect their girl from her. He didn’t know which was worse, his worry or Felicity’s pain.

Oliver trusted Felicity with all he had. He trusted her with his life, with his heart and with everything else. She was the only one who knew every detail of what had happened to him since the Gambit had gone down and he trusted her with that knowledge blindly. God, he had even let her tie him to the bed a year ago which had woken up uncomfortable memories, but that hadn’t been because of a lack of trust. It had just been because of the closeness of his memories to the torture and again he had trusted her with telling him that and with finding a way to make him feel better again which she had.

He also knew how quickly mistakes could happen and that Felicity would never do anything to hurt their children or any child really. She hadn’t paid attention for just a second and the mistake had been made. It was not her fault. He knew that in every fiber of his heart.

These past days Oliver had tried to talk to Felicity about it because he knew he had to talk to her about it. They had to talk about it with each other really and the first step for him was to tell her that what had happened was not her fault and it didn’t make her a bad parent or anything like that because she knew that was probably what was going through her mind. He knew what it felt like to blame oneself for everything that was going wrong, whether it was your fault or not, so he knew that he had to talk with her. She had avoided him, though. She was sleeping when he left and sleeping when he got home. Actually, Oliver doubted that she was really sleeping, but he couldn’t bring himself to risk waking her up. He knew how desperately she craved and needed sleep.

“Exhausting day?”

Sighing, Oliver opened his eyes to find Laurel standing in across the room with Millie on her hip. The little girl had her head rested against her godmother’s shoulder and was smiling at him sleepily.

“Yeah, kind of,” Oliver answered Laurel shortly before he turned his attention to his daughter. He took her from Laurel, lifting her into his arms and kissing her cheek. “Hi, Sweetheart. Why are you still awake? You were supposed to be in bed already.”

“I lay her down for her nap later than usually today, so she was still awake when you were here.”

Oliver frowned. “That’s nice, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to-“

“I didn’t really do that for you,” Laurel interrupted him, smiling apologetically. “Sorry.”

“Then why did you do it?”

Laurel took in a deep breath, crossing her arms in front of her chest. She approached him until she stood only a few feet away from him.

“You have to talk to Felicity.”

Oliver felt his heart skipping a beat. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Laurel replied. “Nothing more than what happened every day, but… Ollie, what happened to Millie last week, I don’t think Felicity can get over that without a little encouragement from you.”

Millie leaned her head against his shoulder and Oliver rested his chin on the crown of her head. He released a low sigh, lowering his gaze.

“Ollie, Felicity doesn’t trust herself around the kids anymore,” Laurel told him. “Today Millie was crying and she couldn’t even get herself to hold her. I tried to hand her over to her and she left. She didn’t feed her. She didn’t change a diaper. She didn’t play with the kids. We could assume that it’s just the exhaustion and everything, but it really isn’t. She is afraid that she is going to hurt the kids when we both know that she’d never do that. What happened to Millie was an accident and-“

“I know that,” Oliver interrupted her firmly because that was what he had told himself all day, too. He didn’t need anyone else to tell him that. “I know it was an accident and it was just a moment that I slipped and it might have looked like I didn’t trust Felicity with the kids, but I do trust her with them and Felicity knows that. She knows that I trust her.”

Laurel sighed quietly, shrugging her shoulders. “Maybe she does when she is herself, but right now I doubt that she really knows it. Felicity doesn’t trust herself and she won’t trust herself until you set the foundation for her to build it back up. Felicity trusts you more than anyone, especially right now and she needs you probably more than ever right now. Ollie, she doesn’t eat. She barely gets out of bed and even if she does, she avoids the kids. This is serious. You have to talk to her and make sure that she really knows how much you trust her in general and especially with the kids. The longer you wait, the more she will distance herself and the harder it will get to pull her back.”

Oliver nodded. “I will do that tonight. Thank you, Laurel.”

“Sure,” she replied with a smile. “I am going to go head home now and be back by tomorrow. There is some pasta I ordered in the kitchen. Maybe you get Felicity to eat a little after you talked things out.”

“I’ll try.” Oliver took in a deep breath and sighed. “I feel I can’t thank you enough, Laurel. What you are doing for my family-“

“Felicity is basically the one sister I still have,” Laurel explained, “and she’s my friend, just like you are. Friends are there for each other, so it’s really not that big deal. Just call me if you need anything more.”

“I will,” Oliver promised.

Laurel smiled at him and walked towards the door. Instead of opening it, she turned around to him once more and laid her hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. She didn’t say a word, though, just looked at him encouragingly. Oliver took in a deep breath before he released it with a sigh, nodding his head.

When the door fell shut behind Laurel, Oliver took in another breath. He kissed Millie’s temple and the young girl lifted her head from his shoulder, looking at him with tired eyes.

“We go upstairs and talk to mommy, okay?” he asked. Millie babbled some random syllables around her pacifier, looking sad. Oliver smiled softly, stroking his fingers through her hair. “I know you know that mommy isn’t quite herself right now. Mommy loves you a lot, though, and you can’t ever doubt that. You just gotta be a little patient for mommy to get better, okay? We both have to be.”

Millie sighed, resting her head back against his shoulder, and Oliver decided to take that as a yes. He kissed her head once more before he carried her upstairs and into Felicity’s and his bedroom. She had the small light on her nightstand switched on, so he could immediately see her lying in bed with her back turned towards him. It had been like this the last three days already. Usually he would go to the bathroom and get changed. When he would come back, she would have turned onto her other side, again turned with her back towards him.

Oliver took in a deep breath and whispered, “Felicity?”

She didn’t show any reaction, just kept breathing in and out suspiciously evenly. Oliver slipped out of his shoes, took off his tie and carelessly dropped his jacket. He walked around the bed to sit on his side of the mattress with Millie on his lap. She immediately reached out her hands for her mommy, releasing a low whine when she couldn’t reach her.

“Felicity, I know you’re not sleeping.”

“But I am trying,” Felicity replied without hesitation, knowing that continuing to pretend being asleep wasn’t going to help her. “I’m tired.”

“I know you are,” Oliver said quietly, “but we have to talk.”

“Can’t we do this tomorrow?” she asked, finally opening her eyes. Her gaze found Millie immediately and she almost flinched away from the baby. “She should be in bed.”

“No, she should be right here with us,” Oliver explained. “She needs her mommy and I think her mommy needs her.”

“I fear her mommy is currently not available.”

“Yes, she is,” Oliver whispered in response.

He loosened his arm from around Millie’s stomach and the little girl rolled over to her mother. Felicity hesitated at first, but when Millie lay down against Felicity’s chest, her hands touching her face, Felicity didn’t waste a second to pull Millie as close as possible and press her nose against her baby’s head to breathe her in. Oliver sucked in a deep breath, feeling his heart tightening at the sight. It was obvious that Felicity had missed Millie just as much as the baby had missed her mommy.

“Felicity, I need to apologize.”

“No, you don’t,” Felicity objected immediately. “I am the one who has to apologize to Millie and to you and-“

“No, you don’t,” Oliver was now the one to object to her.

There was a beat of silence before Felicity sat up, pulling Millie onto her lap and keeping her close. Felicity’s cheeks were wet from tears and Oliver didn’t hesitate to wipe the wetness away from her face. Felicity crawled closer to him, snuggling herself to his side and leaning her head against his shoulder for a long moment. Oliver just put his arms around her slightly trembling body and stroked them over her back, keeping her close and spending some silent support.

It took a long moment before Felicity straightened up a little bit, still staying close to him, but bringing enough distance between them that they could look at each other. Millie was making herself comfortable on her mother’s crossed legs, resting her cheek against her mommy’s thigh and playing with a crease in the jersey pants. Late nap or not, Millie would fall asleep now. While Felicity stroked her right hand over their daughter’s head, her left hand reached out for his and she laced her fingers through his.

“I feel like the depression turns me into a bad mother,” she whispered. “I hate that I am not able to do my job anymore or that I can’t work in the Arrow Cave any longer, but if I can’t even be a mother anymore…”

Oliver stroked his thumb over the back of her hand. “You are a great mother, Felicity. You are just sick and I don’t think it’s fair to hold anything that is happening, as long as you are sick, against you. It’s like… It’s like blaming someone with a cold for sneezing.”

Felicity frowned. “I don’t think that is comparable.”

“Maybe it isn’t,” Oliver admitted. “I am not good with… I don’t know how to tell you this, but… I don’t blame your for anything. What happened wasn’t your fault and it doesn’t make you a bad mother. I still trust you with my life and the kids’ life and everything else. There is nothing you could do that would make me lose my trust in you. This depression will pass eventually and then you are going to be yourself again.”

“And in the meantime I am going to-“

“-do whatever you can without demanding too much of you,” Oliver interrupted her, knowing that whatever she would have said would have only been cruel to herself. “It’s getting time for us to tell Emmy and Tommy about their little sibling anyway. We can tell them that the baby is making you sick-“

“Guides on prenatal depression say that you shouldn’t tell your older kids that the baby is making you sick. It is easy to understand for them but also makes them not like the baby and thinking it’s-“

“Okay, the wording was bad,” Oliver admitted, squeezing her hand. “What I meant is that we can tell them that you are having a baby, but that you are also sick and that makes you tired and-“

“I am thinking about taking the meds Dr. Hampton spoke of,” Felicity interrupted him.

“Oh,” Oliver made. “Okay.”

He frowned. Felicity had been strongly against taking meds. He hadn’t been particularly happy about it because doing nothing but waiting and watching how the depression was progressing felt like torture at times. He knew that Felicity was worried about side effects of the meds and how they might affect the baby, though, and it was a valid worry she had.

“I think it’s the only responsible choice we can make.”

For a long time Oliver didn’t say a word. He pressed his lips together firmly. Then he asked, “Are you sure?”

“You aren’t?” Felicity asked back with a frown.

“I don’t know,” Oliver replied honestly.

Felicity’s frown deepened. “But you always wanted me to take the meds.”

“And you never wanted them.”

“Yes, but obviously my way is only getting our children into danger and-“

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered, squeezing her hand. “Millie was not in danger and this wasn’t you fault.”

“It is the depression’s fault and if we can control that, maybe-“ Felicity stopped, frowning even more. “Why are you suddenly against it?”

“I am not against it in general,” Oliver replied honestly. “I just don’t want you to take it for the wrong reasons.”

“Which would be?”

“Fear for one or rather feeling forced to do so.” Oliver made a pause to lift Felicity’s hand to his lips and kiss the back of it. “Before we decided to have Millie, we talked about the risk of another depression accompanying the pregnancy. We made the decision to take the risk-“

“Yes, when it was about Millie,” Felicity told him. “We never made the decision to risk it again now.”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath, looking down at where Millie was sleeping on Felicity’s legs right now. Having Millie had been a very deliberate decision. They had talked a lot about whether or not they should risk another depression to have another baby. They had decided that they were strong enough to get through that. Oliver had always told himself that they were still strong enough and he still believed in that, but the truth was that the situation had changed because now they didn’t only have Emmy and Tommy. They also had Millie and Millie was a baby and babies always changed everything.

“Are you- Do you think-“ Oliver pressed his lips together for a moment, shaking his head.

There was a voice in his head, wondering if maybe Felicity had only forced to tell him that she loved the baby. Maybe she had felt like as a mother-to-be she had to say that just like she had felt that as a mother-to-be she had to be happy when she had been pregnant with Tommy and actually felt miserable. He knew that the depression could put an obstacle between the bond of mother and baby. He also knew that there were ways to handle this pregnancy that they had never talked about and though there was a part of him that felt the need to offer her these ways, he didn’t even know how to start directing the conversation towards that.

“I love this baby, Oliver,” Felicity whispered like she had been reading his mind. “I love this baby and I want to be strong for him or for her, but I feel like I am a complete mess and I think that’s not fair to him or to her or to me or you or our kids and...”

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath. She put their linked fingers to her lower stomach, holding the palm of Oliver’s hand to where the smallest of a baby bump was showing by now. She didn’t say a word for several minutes, just sitting there with her eyes closed and taking deep breaths. Oliver watched her carefully, watching a small wrinkle form between her eyebrows.

“Okay, here is what we do,” Felicity said with surprisingly firm voice, opening her eyes. “We won’t do anything for now. I will think about the thing with the meds once more and then we decide.”

Oliver nodded. “We do whatever you want to do and you feel you need to do to get better. I am on your side, no matter what.”

Felicity gave him a small smile. “I know. Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Oliver whispered. He put a hand to her cheek and leaned in, brushing his lips against hers gently for a chaste kiss. Resting his forehead against hers, he released a deep breath. “Do you want something to eat?”

Felicity shook her head. “Not hungry.”

“Laurel said you have barely eaten all day.”

“Tomorrow I’ll have breakfast. I promise.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered, not wanting to push. “What do you want to do now, Felicity?”

“Sleep,” Felicity said immediately. “What I really want now is to sleep.”

Oliver smiled. “Then we do that.”

He wrapped his arm around Felicity and pulled her closer with Millie lying safely between them. They lay down together and Oliver tugged the blanket over them.

“Don’t you want to change?” Felicity asked him.

Oliver shook his head with a sigh. “Too tired.”

When their fingers entangled on Millie’s stomach, they sighed in unison.

“Thanks for not blaming me for what happened,” Felicity whispered.

“There is nothing I could blame you of,” Oliver whispered back honestly, “and even if there was, you never blamed me, either. And I did a lot of things you could have blamed me of.”

Felicity smiled at him in the dark. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Oliver replied. “And we will make it through this because we love each other and because we have our wonderful kids, who snuck out of bed and will be here in three, two, one.”

The door to their bedroom opened and Emmy and Tommy stood there, holding each other’s hand.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” Olive asked, lifting his head from the pillow.

“Can we sleep here, too?” Emmy asked.

“Hm,” Oliver made, puckering his lips. He looked at Felicity. “What do you say? Is there enough room in the bed?”

“For our kids?” Felicity asked. “Always.”

“Come on, guys. We make room.”

It took a moment for all of them to be comfortable, but eventually Tommy lay cuddled between Emmy and Oliver, while Millie was cradled safely against Felicity’s chest. It was little room for the five of them, but Oliver was sure that if they just moved a little closer, there was still enough room for one more. Well, two more actually though he doubted that William would be interested to sleep in Felicity’s and his bed.

“You’re smiling,” Felicity whispered after a while over the soft snoring of their children.

“I love lying here like this,” Oliver whispered back.

“So do I,” Felicity admitted. Her hand found his on Emmy’s back and she laced her fingers through his. “We will make it through this, right?”

Oliver nodded slowly. “I think so, yes. We just need to continue working through this together.”

“Together,” Felicity repeated. “Sounds good to me.”

Oliver smiled and squeezed Felicity’s fingers. “Good night, Felicity.”

“Night, Oliver.”


	209. A little more love

After a short glance out of the window Felicity turned around to the kids and told them, “I think daddy’s back home.”

Immediately Emmy and Tommy got up from their chairs and ran towards the door to welcome their father back home. Felicity dropped the towel to the kitchen counter and lifted Millie from her high chair. The little girl immediately grabbed a curl of her mother’s hair and started sucking at the strand of hair while Felicity was carrying her daughter out of the kitchen to follow Emmy and Tommy.

“Daddy!” Emmy yelled as soon as Oliver unlocked the door, continuing to run towards him.

“Daddy!” Tommy called out, too, following his sister.

Chuckling, Oliver dropped his briefcase to the floor carelessly and spread his arms for Emmy and Tommy, who came running towards him. With Emmy bent over his right arm and Tommy bent over his left one Oliver spun around, swirling the kids through the air. Both of them were squealing excitedly, making Oliver laugh happily. When he stopped spinning around and set Emmy and Tommy back to the floor, he went down on his knees and kissed both of their cheeks, pulling them into a tight hug. 

Felicity watched the three of them. She knew that coming home was probably Oliver’s favorite part about being the working parent. Felicity had always loved her work, but she had to admit that coming home to the kids really had been one of the best parts for her, too. Even when you had seen the kids during breakfast and cut your working hours short to get to have dinner with them, when you came back home from work, they treated you like you have been away for weeks.

While Emmy and Tommy started telling their daddy everything they had done today, talking at the same time as they were both trying to raise his attention, Oliver looked from one to the other with a wide smile. He tried to listen to both of them, nodding his head and asking them questions. Even Oliver-I’m-multitasking-in-the-middle-of-a-highspeed-chase-Queen seemed to have trouble keeping up with the two, though.

When Millie released a low sound of dissatisfaction, reaching out her arms for her daddy, Oliver looked up at Felicity and Millie. He smiled before he looked back at Emmy and Tommy. He kissed their cheeks once more before he said, “Okay, you gotta tell me all the rest about this later, but right now I gotta say hi to mommy and Millie.”

That being said Oliver straightened up and approached Felicity. Millie was already holding out her hands for him, so Oliver took her from Felicity. He kissed the baby’s cheek before he wrapped his free arm around Felicity’s waist and pulled her close and kissed her forehead. Felicity rested her head back a little, looking at Oliver’s face, and rubbed her hand over his chest. 

“Hi,” she whispered.

“Hey,” Oliver replied just as quietly. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay,” Felicity assured him. “It’s a better day.”

“Happy to hear that,” Oliver replied. 

He combed her hair with his fingers and tugged at a strand to make her head bend back a little more. Then he used the opportunity to give her a lingering kiss. Felicity sighed against his lips, pressing herself even closer to Oliver’s warm body. It wasn’t until Millie released a low sound that their lips parted.

“You want back to mama?” Oliver asked, watching Millie reaching out her hands for Felicity and making grabby hands.

“Come here, Sweetie,” Felicity said, taking Millie back. Tommy approached his mother and leaned against her legs, rubbing the side of his face against her pants. He and Emmy had played wildly all day, so he was probably quite tired. Felicity moved her fingers through his dark hair and Tommy smiled at her tiredly. Felicity winked at him. Then she looked at Oliver. “How was work?”

“Okay,” Oliver replied. “I am just happy it’s finally weekend.”

“Can we do something at the weekend, Daddy?” Emmy asked, stepping closer.

Oliver lifted her into his arm. “What do you want to do?”

“We see the stars again?” Tommy asked. 

Felicity stroked her hand over Tommy’s dark hair. Her son might have discovered his love for playing doctor – the children’s version of course! – but his love for the stars hadn’t ceased.

“Sounds like a good idea,” Felicity said, looking at Oliver. 

He perked up his eyebrows in surprise. “You’d come with us?”

Felicity gave him a small smile. Her days consisted of lying in bed and waiting for time to pass lately. As much as she was trying to push herself to be a little more active, she struggled with that. She made sure she got to spend some hours with the kids and got a few breaths of fresh air every day, but she still felt exhausted so easily that she hadn’t been in for any activities that would take long or that she couldn’t easily interrupt. Oliver knew that, so she understood his surprise.

She shrugged her shoulders. “I think it’s a good idea if we all do something together and since William is coming over this weekend-“

“Oh, he can’t come,” Oliver interrupted her.

“Oh,” Felicity made, frowning slightly.

“Why doesn’t William come?” Emmy asked.

“William has an important school project that he needs to work on with a friend,” Oliver explained, shrugging his shoulders.

“When he come again?” Tommy asked.

“Soon I hope,” Oliver replied with a smile. “We will see.”

Felicity watched Oliver’s face, not missing the slight discomfort in his face. She bit down on her bottom lip for a moment. William being here today would have been important because they had some special plans for this evening and those required for William to be here actually.

She stroked her hand over Tommy’s hair and asked, “Hey, Buddy, do you and Emmy want to go into the living room already? Daddy and I will follow in a minute and then we can think about when to go and see the stars, okay?”

“Okay,” Tommy replied.

Oliver set Emmy down on the floor and the five-year-old took her brother’s hand and disappeared into the living room with him. Felicity waited until the door to the living room was closed behind them before she readjusted Millie’s position on her hip and looked back at Oliver with a frown.

“William’s not coming?”

Oliver shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. “School is priority, so….”

Felicity nodded. “Yes of course. What about our plans for tonight? We wanted to tell the kids about the baby, but telling them without William-“

“That’s okay. We will tell Emmy and Tommy now, at least if you don’t betray us and tell them before we get the chance to,” Oliver added towards Millie, tickling her stomach and making the baby squeal. He then looked at Felicity again. “I will skype with William later on and tell him then. We shouldn’t wait longer.”

“We also can’t wait much longer,” Felicity added, stroking her hand over her baby bump. The large pullover she was wearing was doing its best to hide the roundness beneath, but it was only a matter of days until it was getting too obvious. It was time for them to tell the kids about the baby. “But… are you sure? It feels wrong doing it without William.”

“We have to deal with how it is,” Oliver just replied and stroked his fingers over her cheek. “I will explain to him why we couldn’t wait longer.”

“Alright if you are sure,” Felicity said, still not completely convinced.

Oliver smiled. “I am sure.”

He leaned forward and captured her lips with his in a gentle kiss. His arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him, so the small swell of her stomach was pressing against his abs. His free hand came to rest against the side of the baby belly, stroking up and down gently.

When their lips parted, he smiled at her, asking, “You’re ready?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, absolutely.”

Oliver laced his fingers through hers and together they walked towards the living room. Emmy and Tommy were jumping on the couch happily, but one slightly strict look from Felicity and they quickly sat down. Emmy and Tommy knew that they weren’t supposed to jump on the couches, but they loved to ignore that rule because it was just too much fun. 

Felicity and Oliver sat down on the couch next to their kids and immediately Tommy crawled onto Oliver’s lap, while Emmy snuggled close to Felicity’s side and played with Millie’s feet, making the baby giggle. Felicity shot Oliver a meaningful gaze and he smiled, nodding his head. 

“So…” Felicity started slowly. She wondered how they had told the kids about Millie or how they had told Emmy about Tommy. It had seemed so easy then. Felicity shook her head. She had done it twice, so she would be able to do it a third time. She just couldn’t think about it too much and trust her gut instead. “Daddy and I wanted to talk to you because we have something important to tell you.”

“We get a dog?” Tommy asked hopefully.

Oliver chuckled and kissed the crown of their son’s head. “What would we do with a dog?”

“Feed and cuddle and play with,” Tommy suggested, leaning back against Oliver’s chest and looking at his daddy with wide eyes. “Please a dog, Daddy.”

“Yes, please a dog,” Emmy added, giving her parents her best angel’s eyes.

“Right now I don’t think we have the time or the room for a dog,” Felicity explained.

“He can sleep in my bed,” Emmy suggested.

“And where are you sleeping?” Oliver asked.

“With him in my bed,” Emmy replied with a big grin.

“You wish!” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“I wish, too,” Tommy said cheekily. 

Again Oliver chuckled. “Not right now. Maybe one day.”

“One day soon?” Emmy asked.

“Let’s first hear what mommy wants to tell you, okay? I am sure the dog can wait when you hear what mommy has to say.”

Emmy and Tommy both looked at their mother and even Millie turned her head to see in Felicity’s face. Felicity took in a deep breath before she stated, “Daddy and I think that right now is not the right time for a dog because we are going to have another baby which means you will get another sister or brother.”

Emmy’s eyes widened. “Another baby?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, another baby.”

“Here?” Tommy asked, putting his hands onto Felicity’s stomach. 

“Yes, the baby is growing in my tummy.”

Emmy leaned forward, pushing her little sister’s legs a little to the side, so she could rest her ear against Felicity’s stomach over her pullover. Tommy mimicked his sister’s position and did the exact same thing from the other side. Oliver quickly took Millie from Felicity, holding the baby against his chest. Felicity stroked her fingers through both of their children’s hair gently.

“When will the baby come?”

“Oh, it’s going to take a long time,” Felicity replied.

“After Christmas?”

“Long after Christmas,” Felicity explained. “It’s even after your birthday.”

“After mine, too?” Tommy asked.

“No, not after yours. It will be before your birthday,” Felicity responded. “We can get a calendar from the kitchen and check.”

“Not yet,” Emmy replied. “I want to know more.”

“What else do you want to know?” Oliver asked, between two kisses to Millie’s cheek. The little girl seemed everything but happy about being taken from mommy, but daddy’s kisses seemed to make it a little better.

“Is it a boy or a girl?”

“We don’t know yet,” Felicity replied. 

“Both?” Tommy asked.

“No,” Oliver and Felicity quickly replied in chorus. The last thing they needed was a baby bomb with twins. One child more was already a lot to take in, but two more would be like a nightmare.

“Can the baby sleep in my bed?” Emmy asked.

“No, in my!” Tommy objected immediately.

Oliver chuckled, “Hey, I am actually sure the baby would want his or her own bed.”

“But sometimes?” Emmy asked. “Can the baby sleep in my bed sometimes?”

“Or in my!” Tommy added.

“We will see about that,” Oliver replied. “You know, the baby is going to be so tiny, he or she could get lost in a big bed like you guys have. That is why the baby will have an own bed.”

“And what room will the baby sleep in?” Emmy asked.

“Mine!” Tommy replied immediately.

“The baby will have a room just for him or her,” Oliver explained. “We will have to make plans to make the house a little bigger, so we can have some more rooms.”

Felicity smiled. She had been a little bit worried about Tommy’s reaction. He had struggled a lot when Millie had come to the family, so the thought of getting another baby into the family could have easily sent him back into those struggles. He seemed to be excited about the new baby, though. Felicity just hoped that he wasn’t only mimicking his older sister’s joy and would struggle later. He loved Millie, so hopefully he was okay with another little sibling now.

For a long moment nobody said a word. Felicity continued to stroke her hands over her children’s heads while Oliver was peppering Millie’s face with little kisses, making the baby squeal with laughter. When Felicity looked at Oliver, his eyes immediately found hers and he winked at her happily. Felicity smiled.

As much as she had struggled with the thought of having another baby, still did a little to be honest, she knew that moments like these would be worth it. They had a big family and they had so much love to give. There was definitely love enough for another baby in here and that was why she wasn’t as worried about having another baby anymore as she used to be. 

When it had been only Oliver and her, they had had enough love first for Emmy and then for Tommy. The love in this family had only grown with them, so there definitely had been enough love to include William into the family despite the drama that had happened all around his arrival into the family. They had all only grown from it and so had their love. It was one of the reasons why Felicity and Oliver had decided to have Millie. There was so much love in their family, why not sharing it with one more person?

This was a little different like everyone about this baby was a little different, but at the end of the day Felicity knew that this one thing still hadn’t changed. They still had enough love. There was always enough love, no matter what would happen.

“Mommy, can we look at the photos of when Tommy was a baby?” Emmy asked eventually.

“That sounds like a good idea,” Felicity replied. “Do you want to get the album?”

Emmy nodded, quickly sliding off the couch and running to the cabinet where they kept the photo albums. 

“I will go and… call William,” Oliver said, getting up.

When Oliver handed Millie over to Felicity, she frowned slightly. “Do you want me to come with you?”

Oliver shook his head. “No, it’s okay. I’ll do that. Enjoy some nostalgia with the kids.”

“You’re sure?”

Oliver nodded. “Okay, just one kiss for daddy from each of you.”

He bent down and immediately Tommy kissed him. Millie didn’t move, but Oliver kissed her gently and the baby giggled. When Emmy came running back with the photo album in her hand, she kissed Oliver, too. Finally Oliver turned to Felicity and kissed her, too.

“I’ll be upstairs if you need me,” he whispered against his lips.

“I’ll be here if you need me,” Felicity replied.

Oliver smiled and pecked her lips once more before he left the living room, tousling Emmy’s hair on his way out. Felicity leaned back on the couch and Tommy and Emmy snuggled back to her side while Millie was sill lying on her mommy’s stomach, pulling at the ends of some strands of Felicity’s hair.

Felicity opened the album and smiled at the first picture she saw. It was the picture that had been taken of him in the night she had learned that she was pregnant again. She remembered the night very clearly. She had been out partying with Thea when the police had come into the club and told them that apparently there had been drugs being tested on the guests. They had all been taken to the hospital. Oliver had come there, too. Quentin had called him and he had dropped everything to check on his sister and wife. Eventually Felicity had been taken to the doctor because of some conspicuities in her blood test. The doctor had told her that her hCG level was increased and then she had known that she was pregnant. Felicity also remembered very clearly how Oliver had thought the hormone was part of the drugs. She would never forget the face of the doctor when Oliver had asked if the drug had really party consisted of a pregnant hormone.

When she felt a pair of soft lips pressing to her cheek, Felicity turned her head to look at Tommy, who smiled at her happily. His face was very close as his arms were wrapped around her neck.

“What was that for?” Felicity asked.

“You smile,” Tommy replied.

“And you don’t smile often, Mommy,” Emmy added. Felicity turned her head to see Emmy resting her chin against her mother’s arm and looking at her. “Aren’t you happy?”

“I am… I am feeling very tired lately,” Felicity explained. “That is why I need to stay in bed so long and why I can’t play with you so much.”

“I know,” Tommy mumbled.

“Daddy told us to be on our best behavior,” Emmy explained. “Are we?”

Felicity smiled. “You three and William are great. Didn’t know how I would do this without you. And if it wasn’t for you being so great, daddy and I wouldn’t be so happy about having another baby. You turned out so well, though, that we are sure it’s a good thing.”

Felicity kissed all three of her children’s heads, tightening her arms around them to pull them even closer to her. She knew she couldn’t have better kids and she didn’t want to think about how this depression would go if her children were any less understanding or any less wonderful. Having the love and support of her family really helped her. 

“Mama, what’s that?” Tommy asked, eventually pointing his finger at the ultrasound picture.

“That is you,” Felicity explained, “when you were still in my tummy.”

“No!” Tommy replied with a laugh, hiding his face against Felicity’s shoulder.

Felicity kissed the top of his head, smiling. “Yes, you were. See? That is you.”

She turned the page to show the kids all the other ultrasound pictures and explained to them exactly what they were supposed to see there. Emmy and Tommy listened closely, asking a lot of questions. Felicity loved that they were so nosy about their little sibling.

“And what does the baby look like now?” Emmy asked.

“I have an ultrasound picture in my purse. Do you want to get it?”

Emmy nodded and quickly ran off, while Tommy leaned forward and repeated Felicity’s words about what there was to see on the ultrasound picture, explaining it to Millie. Felicity looked after her, smiling softly. Yes, her kids were really wonderful and she hoped that was something she was getting to say about the future addition to the family, too. She was hopeful that she would.


	210. Together in all of it

Oliver was just directing the car into the garage when his phone rang. Stopping the car, he grabbed his phone from the pocket of his suit jacket. When he saw Felicity’s face smiling at him happily from under the pillow she had tried to hide behind, Oliver smiled and gently moved his thumb over her face on the display of his phone. He loved the picture because it was so innocent and yet to intimate. Shaking his head to shake off the thoughts, he took the call quickly.

“Hey, what’s-“ Oliver started but stopped and held the phone a little bit away from his ear when an ear-piercing cry was heard from the other side of the call. “Wow, someone is not happy.”

“Understatement of the year,” Felicity replied. She released a deep sigh. “I have no idea what’s going on with her. She has been grumpy all day and now she won’t stop crying.”

Oliver frowned, turning off the engine and getting out of the car. That didn’t sound like Millie at all. The currently youngest Queen was usually the easiest baby to please. She was always happy and always easy to satisfy. Right now she sounded a lot more like her older siblings when they had been younger. Emmy and Tommy had been nightmares of babies, unbelievably exhausting really. Just thinking about it Oliver once again wondered how they had been able to have another baby after these two little monsters. Well, until now Oliver had considered Millie to be his and Felicity’s reward for staying so patient with Emmy and Tommy. 

“That doesn’t sound like her at all,” Oliver replied with a frown, unlocking the door from the garage to the basement of their house. He locked the door behind him again and started strolling upstairs. “Is she sick?”

“No, she is fine. No fever, nothing. She’s just… crying,” Felicity explained, “and I have to admit that I am kind of a nervous wreck now and Laurel’s at work and… I was just wondering if maybe you could come home and-“

When he opened the door to the entrance area of their home, his eyes immediately found Felicity. She seemed to have been walking up and down, bouncing Millie up and down on her hip, but she had stopped and turned around to him once she had heard him. Millie’s face was all red, tears streaming down her cheeks. She didn’t look happy at all.

“Hey,” she said, hanging up the phone and cocking her head at him. “You’re already back.”

Oliver put his briefcase to the floor, quickly loosened his tie and dropped his suit jacket to the floor. When Mae released another loud cry, dropping her head against her mother’s shoulder so hard that Felicity actually flinched, he cocked his head. 

“What’s going on here?”

“Well, I have no idea what’s wrong with her, but if your day hasn’t been too bad, I’d be grateful if you could take over here.”

“Of course,” Oliver replied. 

He approached Felicity and took Millie from her. As soon as the baby was settled against his chest with her head resting against his shoulder and her hand stroking over Oliver’s throat, Millie stopped crying. She released a long breath.

“Hum,” Felicity groaned, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Apparently there is nothing wrong with her and something wrong with me instead.”

“Hey, no,” Oliver hurried to say. 

He secured Millie to his chest with one arm and reached out the other to pull Felicity closer and hold her to the other side of his chest. She sighed, snuggling her cheek to his shoulder and wrapping an arm around his waist. Her other hand came to rest on his forearm under Millie’s butt. When he kissed the top of her head, Felicity rested her head back a little to look at him. She looked tired despite the small smile on her lips.

“Remember when Emmy was colicky during that one weekend and I took care of her all night and she didn’t stop crying and instead it was only getting worse, but as soon as you got up in the morning and took her, she stopped and fell asleep even if not for long?”

Oliver remembered very clearly. It had been the first time Emmy had been really sick and it had been horrible. Emmy had always been quite the crier, but it had never been as bad as when she had been colicky. Oliver had been a nervous wreck by the end of the night because having your baby cry into your ear for hours because she was in so much pain, had brought him to the limits of his patience. And he had been everything but happy when all it had needed for Felicity to take her to have the sick, crying baby calm down. Just like Millie was snuggling up to his chest now, Emmy had snuggled up to Felicity then.

“I remember,” Felicity said eventually.

“And do you remember what you told me when I was a little disappointed that you got her to calm down instantly while I didn’t get to in hours no matter how hard I tried?” 

Felicity sighed. “That it wasn’t about you in general. You were just exhausted after the long nightshift and she felt that, so once she was in the arms of someone who was well rested, she felt that and could calm down, too.”

Oliver smiled. “And since we both know that you are the brains in our marriage, I am pretty sure we should trust you that you are right with that.”

“Well, if I said that, I guess I am right.”

“Yes, you are,” Oliver replied.

He kissed her forehead before Felicity rested her cheek back against his shoulder with a sigh. Oliver tightened his arm around Felicity and rested his chin on top of her head. Moments like these, quiet moments of sharing closeness with his family had always been his favorite moments. Lately he had learned to love them even more.

“Where are Emmy and Tommy?”

“I asked Lyla to take them,” Felicity replied. “When Laurel had to go to work and Millie started with the crying, I called her and asked her to take them. I am sure they have more fun playing with Sara than listening to their little sister crying.”

Oliver chuckled. “Better not traumatize them with how exhausting babies can be or their joy about their coming sibling ceases before they got to know him or her.”

“Exactly my thoughts,” Felicity replied. Sighing, she rested her chin against his shoulder again, making Oliver pull his head back a little to look at her. “You didn’t tell me why you came home early yet.”

“Well, the romantic thing to say would be that I felt that you needed me home, so I came back to be your hero and save the day,” Oliver replied.

“Awww,” Felicity made, moving her hand on his back under his shirt and scratching the scar on his lower back, making Oliver move a little closer to her. He loved when her fingertips stroked over his scars and he loved when she scratched them, especially that scar. “I wish I could say that’s enough of an answer for me, but I love our company, so I need to know that you are treating it with the care it deserves.”

Oliver chuckled. Felicity might be exhausted and due to the depression not quite herself, but she still cared. She cared about her family and she cared about the company. He knew she felt like she was losing herself, but he always saw the glimpses of her in so many of her actions and words. 

“I could rearrange some things and that way I could come home earlier which proved to be right in time,” Oliver replied and smiled. 

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me, too,” Oliver responded. He kissed the tip of her nose shortly before he asked, “Have you been out for a walk today?”

“Not yet,” Felicity replied. “Wanna come with me?”

“I’d love to if you let me.”

“Always.”

Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes and pressed her lips to Oliver’s in a gentle kiss that made him sigh. The kisses he and Felicity had been sharing lately had been a lot more chaste than he was used to, but they were still so full of love that Oliver didn’t mind. He was happy about every kiss he got because he remembered very clearly that during Felicity’s pregnancy with Tommy he had been deprived of any kisses. He knew he had no right to complain and he wasn’t. That didn’t mean he couldn’t be happy about the kisses he got now, though.

While Felicity put on some shoes and her coat, Oliver put Millie in her stroller. Then they made their way out. They walked slowly without any hurry and Millie fell asleep before they even left their street. Oliver was pushing the stroller, while Felicity was walking beside him. Her hands were resting on his forearm, her head against his shoulder. She was leaning almost her entire weight against him, but Oliver didn’t mind. 

“Did you ever think about how kind of normal this struggle is?” Felicity asked eventually.

Oliver frowned. “What do you mean?”

Felicity turned her head a little to lean her chin against his shoulder and look at Oliver. Her arms wrapped more around his forearm and she snuggled a little closer to his side. 

“The first real struggle we had, other than you bleeding in my car,-“

“-and I wouldn’t have wanted to bleed in anyone else’s car for that matter-“

“-was an explosion during our first date.”

“Nothing I like to think about,” Oliver mumbled honestly.

Sometimes he could still remember the moment of panic when he had realized that the restaurant was under attack. He remembered pushing the table away and protecting her with his body because the mere thought of anything happening to her had already been unbearable to him back then. After a moment of losing consciousness he had opened his eyes and seen her. She hadn’t been hurt badly, but there had been blood on her skin and it had been enough to have him terribly worried. He remembered very clearly what he had decided to take from his first date and how that had led to the most bittersweet kiss he had ever had. It would have been the perfect kiss, chaste and yet intense, if it hadn’t been for the heavy feeling of knowing that she couldn’t be his.

“Hey, I am not telling you that for you to think about what happened after that,” Felicity told him, gently pinching his side.

“Ow,” Oliver growled quietly, rubbing the palm of his hand against his ribs where she had pinched him before. When Felicity only rolled her lips into her mouth, he narrowed his eyes at her, making her chuckle against his shoulder. Oliver smiled in response. “Okay, why did you tell me?”

“Because it was kind of a turning point in our relationship, a first step to us being a couple, and it was destroyed by a villain. Then we had our first child almost taken from us by your stalker before she was even born. My stalker came back to steal me and Emmy from you a couple of months later. A few years later the kids and I have been taken from you by both of our stalkers and between all this craziness we both had some near-death experiences thanks to some other villains who attacked us.”

“What a wonderful summary of all the bad things happening in our life,” Oliver said, frowning slightly because he still didn’t get what she was trying to say. “Thanks for reminding me.”

Felicity smiled and kissed his shoulder through his shirt. “What I am trying to say is that our normal is usually quite unnormal given our nightly activities. This depression is kind of a real normal bump in the road, isn’t it? A lot of other couples go through this, too. How many couples get abducted on an annual basis?”

Now Oliver smiled, too, because now he understood what Felicity was trying to say. Their life was so far from normal most of the times that really this sickness, a sickness that can hit any woman really, was kind of a normality they didn’t get to experience too often, at least not when it was about situations of crisis. 

“I would accept less normality if you didn’t have to go through it.”

“I know,” Felicity replied with a sigh, “but we are doing this together, so it’s only half as bad as it could be if you weren’t here with me.”

“I’m doing what I can, but-“

“No buts,” Felicity told him. She stood still and Oliver did the same thing, just pushing the stroller back and forth a little to make sure Millie would stay asleep. Felicity took his hand and explained, “I think we are doing everything we both can by doing it together and that is all that matters and all that counts. I know I can lean on you and tell you what I need and… well, that’s helping me. Knowing that you are in this with me, that we are together in this is helping me. I want you to know that.”

Oliver smiled. He lifted their joined hands to his chest and pressed the back of her hand right over his heart. 

“For better or worse. In sickness and in health,” Oliver said. “I meant it and I am trying to live up to that.”

“You are doing great,” Felicity told him. She turned her hand to rest his palm over his heart. “You make everything so easy for me.”

“Given it’s all I can do…” Oliver said, shrugging his shoulders.

He didn’t feel like he was doing enough and he knew that Felicity knew he felt that way. He had voiced it a few times. She pulled her hand out from under his and framed his face with both of her hands, holding it between them dearly. Then she straightened up and kissed him. 

“I love you,” she whispered against his lips.

“I love you, too,” Oliver whispered back, wrapping an arm around her waist. 

Felicity pulled back a little, looking at him intently. “That’s all I really need.”

Oliver took in a deep breath and looked at her for a long moment before they continued their walk down the street. Felicity snuggled back against his side with her head resting against his shoulder. Oliver sighed and leaned his head against hers. Felicity was right. They were doing anything they feel they could and maybe that was indeed all they were able to do. Felicity knew that she could lean on him and that was all that really mattered. Maybe that was enough.


	211. Sorrow à deux

Just when Felicity had pushed the last spoon of puree between Millie’s lips, the doorbell rang. Frowning, Felicity glanced at her watch. Laurel couldn’t be back from the short trip to the grocery store with Emmy and Tommy yet and even if she was, she had keys. Felicity didn’t expect anyone else, though.

“Come on, Millie,” Felicity said with a sigh, lifting the baby onto her lip and took away the bib from around her neck. “Let’s see who’s visiting us.”

While she was strolling to the door, bouncing Millie up and down on her hip, the eight-month-old baby grabbed the end of her mother’s ponytail and started playing with the strands of hair. When Felicity looked at her daughter with mockingly narrowed eyes, the little girl giggled in amusement.

“You’re having fun with mommy’s hair?” Felicity asked.

Once again Millie giggle. “Ba-ba-ba.”

“Yeah, I know you are having a lot of fun,” Felicity replied. 

She kissed her daughter’s cheek right before she reached out her hand to open the door. Felicity couldn’t say who she had expected. Well, if she had been forced to guess, she would probably have gone with Lyla or maybe Thea. Her friends her family were doing their best to support her without suffocating her with their visits.

Anyway, who Felicity most definitely hadn’t expected was Samantha Clayton. Yet the brunette was standing in front of her door with her arms crossed in front of her chest and a hesitant expression on her face. Felicity frowned. Samantha didn’t really come here often. Sometimes she drove William here or picked him up, but William wouldn’t be here until tomorrow morning. Besides, Felicity couldn’t see the boy anywhere close.

“Samantha, hi,” Felicity said, pushing her hip which Millie sat on back when a gust of wind made her shiver. The last they needed was a sick baby.

“Hey,” Samantha said, smiling a little insecurely. “Uhm… I was actually hoping to talk to Oliver.”

“He’s at work,” Felicity explained and when another gust of wind sent another shiver down her back, she quickly stepped aside. “Come in.”

Samantha hesitated for a moment before she followed Felicity’s invitation and stepped into her home. Felicity led her into the kitchen and offered her a cup of coffee, but Samantha declined, so Felicity just poured them both a glass of water. She wondered what had brought Samantha here. It was kind of unlikely for her to just show up. 

Felicity brought Millie, who was already about to fall asleep again after her little snack, into the living room in the crib there. When she sat down on the opposite side of the table then, pulling her feet on the seat, so her thighs were pressed to her chest, she asked, “Did something happen?”

“No,” Samantha replied before pressing her lips together for a moment. “Or maybe yes. I…”

She released a long sigh, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment. Felicity frowned. Whatever was going on seemed to bother Samantha. 

“Is William okay?” Felicity asked worriedly. 

“He’s… he’s just a little… disappointed,” Samantha said after a moment.

“Disappointed?” Felicity asked back.

Samantha sighed. “Felicity, I know we didn’t have the best start with each other and I know that it was completely on me. I just… I had hoped that we would be over that to a point where we could make sure that we were doing the best for William and I actually had the impression that William was a real part of Oliver’s and your family. He loves all of you and he loves spending time here and-“

“Samantha, I have no idea what you are trying to tell me. We love having William here. He is always welcome. The kids adore him. Oliver and I love him. We wished he was here more often actually and-“

“Then why did Oliver cancel the last three weekends with him?”

Felicity frowned. “He what?”

Samantha shrugged her shoulders. “He said you two have a lot on your plate right now and you wouldn’t have that much time. I absolutely understand that this can always happen. There are times that people have a lot on their plates and it’s a lot harder for your guys because you have three kids of your own and I only have this one and then you are responsible for thousands of people’s jobs, but it’s been six weeks since William has last been here. He has tried to suggest coming on other weekends or even in the week to make it work for you… and you look at me like you have no idea what I am talking about.”

“I really don’t,” Felicity said, taken aback by this news. “Oliver told me William was so busy with school lately that he couldn’t come here.”

Felicity tried to recall all the times she and Oliver and talked about William lately. He really had been in Starling a long time ago the last time. It had probably been for Oliver’s ten-year anniversary of his comeback from the island. Oliver had even told William about the pregnancy over Skype instead of in person.

“So Oliver didn’t tell you?”

Felicity shook her head. “No, I really thought it was because William didn’t have that much time because of a school project. If I had known that Oliver cancelled the weekends…”

“Do you know why he would do that?” Samantha asked. 

“Actually I think I do,” Felicity replied. “Did William tell you that I am pregnant again?”

Samantha nodded. “Congratulations by the way.”

“Thanks.” Felicity shifted on her chair a little before she explained, “I guess Oliver didn’t tell William that there is actually some trouble around the pregnancy?”

Samantha shook her head, looking guiltily. “I am sorry, Felicity. If I had known-“

“No, no,” Felicity interrupted her quickly. “The baby is going to be fine. It’s more me than the baby anyway that is affected and I am glad that you came here and told me because it’s not okay. William shouldn’t be affected by what is happening like this and he certainly shouldn’t be left in the dark about it. I am going to take care of this. I’d like to invite him over for the weekend if you don’t mind.”

“No, of course not,” Samantha said. She bit down on her bottom lip for a moment before she asked, “Is it okay to ask what exactly is going on? Just in case William is going to talk to me about it?”

“I am depressive,” Felicity explained without hesitation. She actually wondered why they hadn’t told Samantha and William about it. Well, she had thought Oliver would have told William already. “It’s the second time this happened during a pregnancy and I think Oliver is trying to make things as easy for me as possible and I guess he jumped to the conclusion that it was easier to have three kids here instead of four. He really didn’t mean bad. Oliver loves William and-“

“I know,” Samantha soothed her quickly, giving her a comforting smile. “I am not blaming either of you. I have no idea how hard this has to be for you. If there is anything I can do or…”

Felicity shook her head. “We got it handled for the most part. I will immediately call William.”

“Thank you,” Samantha said, getting up. “I am sure he will be happy.”

“Thank you for coming here. I really appreciate it,” Felicity explained.

“Like I said before, I know we had a bad start because of my actions, but I am glad we could figure this out.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “Everything for William.”

As soon as Samantha had left, Felicity grabbed her phone and dialed William’s number. It only took five seconds for him to take the call.

“Hello?”

“William, hi, it’s Felicity,” she said immediately.

“Felicity, hi,” William replied and Felicity didn’t miss the slightly surprised tone in his voice. “What’s up?”

“I was just wondering if you were free this weekend? It’s been awhile since you have been here, so I thought you’d like to spend the weekend here.”

“Dad said you were busy.”

Felicity pressed her lips together. “Well, things changed. How about you come over tonight already or do you have something planned for after school?”

“No, I don’t, so that would be nice,” William replied and Felicity could hear the smile in his voice. 

“See you tonight,” Felicity replied and hung up. She strolled over to the living room where she could hear Millie squealing happily. She smiled at her daughter affectionally and tickled her baby’s tummy. Millie squealed once more, kicking her little feet amusedly. “Your oldest brother is coming for the weekend. On a scale from one to ten how happy does that make you?”

Again Millie squealed, reaching out her arms for her mother. Felicity lifted Millie into her arms and kissed the little girl’s temple. She held the baby close to her, rocking her in her arms slightly. The last she wanted was for any of her children to be affected by what was happening with her. It was bad enough that Emmy and Tommy hadn’t missed that she wasn’t as happy as she used to be or that she had forgotten Millie in the car once. She didn’t want this to affect William’s place in this family. She might not share DNA with him, but he was like her child nonetheless, so she would do her best to make sure he wasn’t affected by the depression, either. 

 

Oliver slipped into his sweatpants, leaving his suit on the floor carelessly. Felicity always said he was spoiling her too much when really being back at QI only proved that he wasn’t spoiling her enough. She did an amazing work at the company which made it all the harder for him to try take her place, not that he really could anyway. The company had never been more successful than it was now, not even back in the days when his father had still been at the head of the company. 

Exhaustedly he strolled out of the room. She shot a look in Tommy’s room where he was playing with his older sister. The two were playing with Lego bricks happily.

“Where’s mommy?” Oliver asked. 

“Putting Millie to bed,” Emmy explained without looking up.

Oliver glanced at his watch. He hadn’t even known how late it was until now. He shook his head. Time flew by so quickly lately. 

“What do you want for dinner? Pasta?”

“Mommy said pizza,” Tommy replied. 

“Pizza?”

“Yes,” Tommy answered. 

Since neither of the kids seemed especially interested in talking to him right now, both of them fully focused on the game, Oliver shrugged his shoulders and went downstairs. Ordering pizza and watching a movie actually sounded like the perfect way to spend the evening. He would probably fall asleep on the couch, but with his family snuggled up to him that was just so easily happening. 

Just when Oliver had reached the foot of the stairs, the doorbell rang. For the break of a second he considered ignoring it because he really wasn’t up for any visitors right now, but then he made up his mind. Releasing a deep sigh, he strolled towards the door, opening it.

“William,” he said surprised, seeing his oldest son standing in the door with his backpack on. “What are you doing here?”

He regretted the question as soon as he had asked because he could see the hurt in William’s eyes. It was the same pained expression he had already seen when he had to cancel the last weekends. With Felicity’s depression he had just figured that maybe it was better to delay William’s weekends here a little bit. Emmy and Tommy were always especially overexcited and that could end up in some really loud evenings that he was sure wasn’t helping Felicity to rest. It didn’t mean that he hadn’t missed his son like crazy or that he had felt comfortable with asking William not to come. 

“I mean… I thought I told you that the timing right now was a little-“

“William,” Laurel said, stepping beside him and opening the door further for William to come in. “Felicity is putting Millie to bed, but she asked me to tell you to go right upstairs. She is actually waiting for you already.”

“Oh, okay,” William said, shooting a nervous look in Oliver’s direction before he put his backpack away, took off his jacket and shoes and went upstairs. He looked back over his shoulder to Oliver once more before he disappeared. 

Oliver frowned, looking from the stairs to Laurel, who had closed the door and was looking at him with her head cocked. 

“What?” Oliver asked.

“Samantha has been here today and told Felicity why William wasn’t here these last weeks and apparently it had little to nothing to do with school.”

Oliver lowered his gaze, feeling his heart drop. He hadn’t wanted for Felicity to find out. He hadn’t wanted to lie to her, either. He just knew her and he knew that there was no way that she would admit that maybe having four kids at home was just too much and it was stressing her out. He knew that the depression caused her to get exhausted easily. He wanted her to feel better. That was all he wanted. 

“Felicity didn’t say anything when I came home,” Oliver whispered. 

“I think she wanted to talk to William first,” Laurel explained. 

Oliver nodded slowly before he looked at Laurel. “She’s mad at me?”

“I don’t think so.” Laurel shrugged her shoulders. “I think she understand why you decided to do it. I guess she just doesn’t agree with it. Just give her and William a few minutes to talk and then go upstairs and talk to her about it.”

Oliver nodded slowly, lowering his gaze again. He should probably know by now that he and Felicity worked best when they talked openly to each other. Keeping secrets and lying, even it was meant well, barely ever took them anywhere. He just felt terribly overchallenged with this. It was too much and he felt helpless about how to help her and-

His thoughts came to a stop when Laurel put a hand to his shoulder. He looked at her and found her smiling comfortingly. 

“You are doing the best you can and Felicity knows that. You don’t always have to do the right thing because I can only imagine how hard it is to figure out what the right thing is in this situation. I think the only thing that really matters is that you are here and you are trying to do it together. Felicity might be depressive, but she is still Felicity. She loves you and she knows that you are only trying to help,” Laurel explained, squeezing his shoulder gently. “I gotta go upstairs to take over Millie.”

Oliver nodded. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. As uncomfortable as he felt about the upcoming talk with Felicity, he was actually kind of glad that she had found out. Now William was here and he didn’t have to lie to her anymore. He hated lying to her, always had actually.

 

“Oh, I think your brother is coming,” Felicity whispered to Millie when she heard the doorbell ring. “You can say hi to him before you’re falling asleep. I am sure you missed him.”

Millie just looked up at Felicity with her wide, blue eyes. She was eagerly sucking the warm milk from the bottle into her mouth. Her little hands held onto the warm glass like she was thinking Felicity could take the bottle away before she was finished with her little goodnight snack. 

When there was a quiet knock at the door, Felicity turned her head to see William standing in the doorframe with his hands pushed into the pockets of his jeans and his shoulders hunched up. He looked so much like Oliver in this moment Felicity figured. 

“William, hi,” she said with a smile and adjusted Millie’s position in her arms to make the baby see her brother. “Millie, look who’s there.”

“Hi, little sis,” William said. 

When he came closer, Felicity handed Millie over to him and got up from the rocking chair to make room for William, who continued to give his little sister the rest of the bottle. He looked at her with a content smile.

“I am glad you could come,” Felicity said.

William looked at her, a hint of insecurity on his face. “Dad didn’t seem to know I was coming by. Are you sure he is okay with that?”

“One hundred percent,” Felicity replied with firm voice. “Your dad is very happy you are here. I just didn’t tell him you’d come by because I first wanted to talk to you and explain something to you.”

“You don’t have to,” William replied, shaking his head. “Dad told me you are having another baby and I guess it’s just very exhausting and… Well, congratulations anyway.”

“Thank you,” Felicity said, “but I still need to explain something to you. Your dad would have really wanted you here and it has nothing to do with the baby or being pregnant per se that caused him to… kind of uninvite you.”

Once Millie had finished her bottle, William put her into her crib. She wasn’t sleeping, but Felicity had already asked Laurel to make sure she was falling asleep, so she could talk to William. The two went into her bedroom and sat down at the edge of the bed next to each other. William held his gaze down and it almost broke Felicity’s heart.

“Did your mother tell you that she was here this morning?” Felicity asked.

William looked up with surprise, shaking his head. 

Felicity smiled. “We talked about what was going on. I thought she might have given you a head start, but I am actually kind of glad that she didn’t because that way I can tell you exactly what’s been going on.”

William hesitated, but he shrugged his shoulders eventually. “Okay.”

“Oliver once told you that I had some trouble during the pregnancy with Tommy, right?”

He nodded. “Is something wrong with the baby?”

“No, the baby is fine,” Felicity hurried to say with a smile. “It’s just that this pregnancy caused a depression. It’s… it’s a really complicated thing that comes from the surprise of having another baby unexpectedly and having so much stress with work and an eight-month-old and probably some more. It… just… sometimes that happens to women, especially when they had been depressive before like I have been when I was pregnant with Tommy. Anyway, I am really tired and exhausted most of the time and not really feeling like myself, so it’s not easy for anyone here.”

“Is that why dad started working at QI?”

Felicity nodded. “I started making sure that the little energy I have is saved for family time because if I have to choose between my job and my family, then I have to choose my family.”

William nodded sadly. “I understand. Your family is more important right now. Besides, I am fifteen, so I actually understand it better than Emmy, Tommy and Millie I guess. It’s okay. I have my mom and-“

“You are part of my family, William,” Felicity interrupted him as soon as she realized that he had misread her words, taking his hand and squeezing it. “I know I am usually hesitant to use any kind of possessive pronoun when talking about you. I just… saying you are my son or my child… it’s not that I don’t feel like that. For me you are as much a part of this family as Emmy, Tommy and Millie, but I don’t know if you feel comfortable with me thinking that way. I know that you have a mom and I don’t want to replace her or anything. I also know in a lot of ways Oliver and Samantha are your parents first and foremost but-“

“You are my parent, too,” William was now the one interrupting her, “at least kind of. You welcomed me here with open arms and you trust me with your kids and I just… I just can’t call you mom or something because like you said I have a mom.”

“I absolutely understand,” Felicity told him, “and I am not expecting you to call me mom or anything. I just want the both of us to be comfortable around each other and see each other as family if that is okay.”

“I see you as family.”

Felicity smiled. “I see you as family, too. I am very glad we got to know you. My kids are very lucky to have you as a brother.”

William smiled and hesitatingly moved to hug Felicity. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she moved hers around his torso, holding him to her for a moment. When he pulled back, Felicity let go of him. They both smiled at each other for a moment, neither saying a word. 

“So that is why dad uninvited me? Because he thought four kids were too much struggle?” William asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I guess so. Please don’t be mad at him. He is really just trying to do the right thing for me and he never meant to hurt you.”

“I know that,” William assured. “I was just worried that with the new baby maybe you didn’t want to have me here anymore.”

“We all love having you here, and we’d actually love to have you here more often, but we know that’s difficult with school and your friends and everything.”

William smiled and bit down on his bottom lip. “I have to serve an internship for school in January. Two weeks actually and I wondered if maybe I could do that at QI and live here for so long?”

Felicity smiled. “That’s a wonderful idea. If your mother is okay with that, we would all be very happy.”

“I talked to her and she said it’s okay,” William replied. “I could also help with Emmy, Tommy and Millie.”

“Only when you want to,” Felicity replied. “You know you have all freedom with them, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to take care of them.”

“I always wanted to have siblings, so it’s really cool,” William assured. “And I like taking care of them.”

“Okay then,” Felicity replied with a smile. 

William really was great with the kids. It was why she trusted him with them so easily. She knew that he was very responsible for his age and he had a good relationship to them. It was why Felicity had no doubt that he could handle them even if they had their bad moments when Emmy became a little too feisty or Tommy turned into a fury. 

Felicity cocked her head, a sudden thought coming to her mind, and her smile widened when she asked, “How would you like to be this baby’s godfather?”

William’s eyes widened slightly. “Really?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “I wouldn’t know anyone who’d be better.”

“I would love to,” William replied and pulled her into another hug. “Thank you so much, Felicity.”

“No, thank you,” Felicity responded, rubbing her hands over his back. 

She was really glad that William had joined their family. There might have been some trouble around his introduction, but that had never had anything to do with him. William had always been a wonderful boy and you could say about Samantha what you wanted, Felicity felt she had done her best as a mother, even if she had made mistakes. But really what parent could say they had never made mistakes?

“Hey.”

At the quiet voice, Felicity and William both turned around. Oliver stood in the frame of the door with his hands pushed into the pockets of his sweatpants and his shoulders hunched up. Once more today Felicity realized how similar Oliver and William looked.

“I… will go and say hi to Emmy and Tommy,” William said, getting up from the bed and walking towards the door.

“I am really sorry, William,” Oliver said. 

William shrugged his shoulders. “It’s okay. Felicity explained it to me. You were trying to do the right thing.” 

“I don’t know if that’s enough of an apology,” Oliver replied.

“You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself,” William replied. “I really understand why you did it, so… I will give you the room.”

Oliver looked after him for a long moment before he looked towards Felicity. She smiled gently. 

“He’s really understanding, especially for his age.”

“Yeah.” Oliver nodded before he lowered his gaze.

Felicity scooted back on the mattress until she was sitting with her back resting against the headboard of the bed. She spread her legs and patted the mattress between them. Oliver looked up and approached her immediately. He lay down between her legs with his head resting on her chest like he loved so much. He kissed her shoulder through her pullover and wrapped his arms around her upper arm, holding onto it. Felicity closed her legs, hugging his body with them. She stroked one hand up and down his back while the other was stroking through his hair. Oliver held his face away from her, but she could see the exhausted and pained expression on his face. 

“This doesn’t feel right,” Oliver whispered. 

Felicity frowned, her fingers faltering for the break of a second before they continued massaging his scalp and rubbing soothing circles on his back. 

“Me holding you?”

“I should be the one holding you,” Oliver told her. 

Felicity kissed the crown of Oliver’s head and shook her head. “No, I think it should be exactly like this.”

“Not sure about that. You always take such good care of me and I-“

“So do you,” Felicity assured him. “You are taking care of me very well. You are always here when I need you, even when I don’t know that I need you. You never blame me for anything and you… just trust me when I tell you that you have been great throughout this.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, his arms around hers tightening a little bit. “Until now.”

Felicity shook her head, kissing his forehead right under his hairline. She could feel Oliver taking in another deep breath before releasing it with a slightly trembling sigh. 

“I know why you did it,” she whispered, keeping her lips close to his forehead. “I know that you feel you need to protect me from all stress, but having William here doesn’t cause me any stress. It’s quite the opposite. I love having him here. I just need you to trust me that I know how much stress I can handle. You can-“

Oliver shifted quickly, causing Felicity to fall silent. He put an arm to each side of her body, propping himself up on his forearms, so he could look at her without craning his neck. Felicity could see the tears glistening in his eyes and it broke her heart seeing him like that. 

“I do trust you,” he assured her. 

“I know that,” Felicity replied quickly, knowing that trust issues had been a sore spot in their relationship and marriage a lot of times, but they were past that. “I didn’t mean it like that. What I mean is that I know that you want to protect me from everything that could make me feel worse, but you can’t always do that. And sometimes your need to protect me is not necessary like with William. That is why it is important that we talk about things before either of us makes decisions, especially such huge ones. Okay?”

Oliver nodded, swallowing hard. “I am so sorry.”

Felicity shook her head. “I don’t want you to feel guilty. I just want you to understand. This situation is nothing normal and we are both still trying to deal with it and find a way to make it work. I just don’t want to lose our… communication about this.”

Oliver nodded slowly, swallowing once more. When tears escaped his eyes, Felicity put her hands to his cheeks and framed his face gently, wiping the tears away with her thumbs. Oliver leaned into her touch, closing his eyes. His breathing was trembling and Felicity pulled his face closer to hers until his forehead was resting against hers. 

“I feel so helpless,” he whispered eventually, his voice broken. “I want to help you and take your pain away, but I know I can’t. It’s…”

“I know,” Felicity whispered, continuing to wipe her thumbs over his cheek to dry the tears that were still falling from his eyes. “But you are doing the best you can and you do help me even if that doesn’t make the depression go away.”

Oliver took in another deep breath before he suddenly shook his head to shake her hands off and tried to pull away, but Felicity kept her hands on his face firmly, refusing to let him pull away. 

“You really shouldn’t be comforting me. This is about you. I mean I should be taking care of you because you are the one who needs me to support you now and-“

Felicity shook her head. “Oliver, we need each other’s support in this situation. Maybe this is more about me than about you, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not about you at all. You are suffering from this, too. When you had nightmares at the beginning of our relationship and you woke up choking for air and being disorientated and scared, you always said you needed to hold me to ground yourself back to reality. The truth is that you didn’t just need to hold me. I needed to be held by you, too, because these nightmares scared me and hurt me, too. That is who we are. We promised that everything that is yours is mine and the other way around. Pain and fears are no exception.”

Oliver looked at Felicity, taking in a deep breath through his mouth. She looked at him intensely and eventually Oliver nodded. “You are right.”

“I usually am,” Felicity replied.

Oliver chuckled and leaned his face back into her touch more. Then he turned his head and kissed the palms of her hands before he opened his eyes and looked at her. “I love you.”

Felicity smiled. “I love you, too.”

She pulled him closer for a kiss, leaning in to close the distance between them at the same time. Their lips met in a soft kiss that made goosebumps run down the length of her spine. She opened her lips to him and deepened the kiss, their tongues stroking against each other’s. Felicity stroked her fingers through his stubble, enjoying the tickling feeling against her fingertips. 

When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against hers for a long moment. Eventually Oliver rested his head back on her chest. His arms tightened around her body, making sure they were as closely entwined as possible. Felicity was sure he was listening to her heartbeat. He had once told her that it was his favorite lullaby. It always soothed him to listen to it. 

“Can we stay like this a little longer?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied, going back to stroking her hands up and down his back like she had done before. “By the way, William is going to spend two weeks here in January to serve an internship at QI.”

“I like that,” Oliver said sleepily. “You will have to tell me what is going to be the most interesting for him to see.”

“I will,” Felicity assured. “Maybe if I am feeling better by January, which I really hope, I can come over and show him some things.”

“I am sure he would like that.”

“I also asked him to become our baby’s godparent.”

“Oh really?” Oliver asked. “What happened to ‘we should talk about decisions and make them together’?”

“That was before I said that,” Felicity whispered, making Oliver chuckle. “Are you okay with that?”

“I couldn’t have picked anyone better.”

“Exactly what I told him, too,” Felicity replied with a smile. 

“I love when we think and say the same things.”

“Well, how did Curtis call it?”

“Synchrolicity,” they said at the same time, both of them chuckling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you missed it: 
> 
> 2 truths, 1 lie for the chapter 213-15 (this was 211):   
> 1\. Olicity talk about not having sex lately.   
> 2\. Some women hit on Oliver.   
> 3\. Olicity have sex again.
> 
> Quick reminder that Olicity is never going to cheat on each other. ;)


	212. Friendships

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you might have noticed the changes in my social media settings lately. Since I have changed them again and again these last couple of days, these are the changed settings as they will stay for a while: 
> 
> **Ao3:**
> 
>   * Anon comments are no longer available.
>   * Comment moderation is switched on. 
>   * I am currently not answering to comments. 
>   * I might not even read comments most of the time, so feel free to spare time and not comment. You don’t have to feel guilty about it. Like I said, I am barely reading comments anyway right now.
>   * I did, however, change back the setting of availability, so all fics are available for not-registered users, too. (The anonymity of not being face-to-face with someone seems to be enough for people to feel safe to just be mean since it’s just their pseudo and not their actual name attached to the comment. I figured if that is the case, shutting out not-registered readers was not going to have any positive effect.)  
> 
> 

> 
> **Tumblr:**
> 
>   * Anon asks are no longer possible.
>   * Submissions are no longer possible.
>   * I actually use the block-button.
> 

> 
> **Twitter:**
> 
>   * Protected mode is switched on.  
> 
> 


“Wow,” Felicity said when she entered the living room, her eyes widening in surprise. 

The furniture was pushed to the walls to make room on the floor where mattresses, pillows and blankets were spread and built a comfortable seating area. On a wide table in the middle there were all kinds of homemade food that Oliver and the kids had prepared since yesterday. The smell was delicious and actually made her stomach crumble. If it wasn’t for the cold storm going on outside, she might actually get the impression that it was spring instead of late autumn. 

When Oliver went past her into the living room, putting two carafes with homemade juices onto the table, she asked him, “How did you manage to set all of this up in only an hour?”

“The kids were a great help,” Oliver explained. 

“Good thing we have so many of them then.”

“It’s just four,” Oliver replied with a chuckle before he approached her and put his hands on the swell of her stomach before he added, “at least for the next months.”

“Twenty-four more weeks to go,” Felicity said with a sigh, leaning against Oliver and he wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed the crown of her head. Felicity sighed. “It feels like I have been pregnant forever.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered, “but we got through the last sixteen and we will get through the next twenty-four, right?”

Felicity tipped her head back and smiled at Oliver. “Right.”

She straightened up on the tip of her toes, putting her arms around his neck and stroking her fingertips through the short hair at the nape of it. Oliver lowered his head, leaning down for a kiss, and just when Felicity was about to touch his with hers-

“They’re coming!” Emmy yelled from the kitchen and Felicity heard two pair of feet hurrying to the front door.

“You’re still sure you’re in for this afternoon?”

“It’s just an indoor picnic with the Diggles, not a… whatever is the most stressful thing you can think about,” Felicity replied, moving her hands down his shoulders and gently patting his chest. Instead of giving him the long kiss she had planned for, she pecked his lips only shortly and then took his hand to pull him to the door. “Come on.”

At the door the kids were already welcoming the Diggles. John had lifted Emmy into his arms, while Tommy was hugging Lyla with his head resting on her baby bump. William had gotten down on his knee, holding Millie on one of his thighs to give Sara the opportunity to talk to the baby. Felicity squeezed Oliver’s hand and he shot her a smile.

“Mommy, Aunt Lyla’s belly is bigger,” Tommy said, leaving his godmother to run to his mother instead. Oliver quickly lifted the boy from the floor and handed him over to Felicity, so she didn’t have to lift him herself. She had had some issues with her back earlier this week, so it was probably better to let Oliver lift him. “Why is Aunt Lyla’s belly bigger? She’s having two babies?”

“No, Aunt Lyla’s baby is just older than our baby,” Felicity said with a chuckle and kissed her son’s cheek. “You wanna show Sara what you helped daddy and the others set up in the living room?”

Tommy nodded. “Yes.”

Felicity let Tommy back down and he took Sara’s hand and quickly took her with him. Sara barely had the time to wave at her godparents before she was taken away.

“Wait! I come with you!” Emmy hurried to say, kissed John’s cheek and quickly struggled out of his arms to follow them.

“I better check everything is alright,” William said with a chuckle and followed the others, taking Millie, who was already pointing her finger towards the living room, with him.

John looked after the kids, shaking his head with a chuckle. “Have I ever told you how much I love your children?”

“They are kind of amazing,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. He squeezed Felicity’s hand once more before he let go of her fingers to welcome his friend by pulling him into a hug. “Great you could make it.”

“Can’t reject an opportunity for good food,” John responded with a chuckle. 

Felicity went to Lyla and hugged her. Their baby bumps pressed against each other’s, making it almost a little difficult to hug. They pulled apart with a chuckle, holding their hands to each other’s stomachs. 

“How are we supposed to hug in the next twenty weeks?”

“Hey, only nineteen for me to go, so it might be fine by then,” Lyla replied with a chuckle.

Felicity groaned. “I am jealous. I wished we had already hit the twenty-week-mark.”

Lyla smiled comfortingly before she cocked her head and asked, “How are you feeling?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “There are good days and bad days, more good than bad lately.”

“Maybe that’s a sign that things are getting better,” Lyla stated. 

“I wouldn’t hold my breath,” Felicity said, sighing. “Whenever I thought it was getting better, it was quickly getting much worse again.”

Lyla rubbed her hands up and down Felicity’s upper arms. “We are always here for you.”

Felicity smiled, whispering. “I know. Thank you.”

The two pregnant women looked at each other for a moment longer before they pulled apart. While Oliver hugged Lyla, Felicity stepped into John’s warm embrace. 

“You’re going to make it,” he whispered into her hair. “You’ve always been the strongest of all of us.”

Felicity smiled. “I doubt that the last thing is true, but I am surely holding onto the first part.”

Once all the welcomes were given, the four joined their children in the living room. While the kids were playing together, the adults sat together and enjoyed some of the food. Felicity was leaning back against Oliver’s chest and he wrapped an arm around her stomach loosely. His hand brushed against the baby bump occasionally, stroking over it gently. For a while they just chatted about anything and everything.

With muffled voices to make sure the kids wouldn’t hear them as William still wasn’t in on this secret, they started talking about their night time jobs eventually. Felicity asked about how the team was doing in her absence, especially since Oliver and Laurel were kind of absent a lot, too. It seemed like Thea, Roy and John got it handled, though. The crime in the city had decreased a long time ago anyway. The times that they had been forced to head out every other night to stop a bank from being robbed, a person from being killed or the whole city from being attacked were far in the past. It didn’t mean that there wasn’t a time of crisis every now and then.

“So Curtis is handling it well?” Felicity asked eventually. 

“He is really good at what he is doing,” John confirmed. “Not as good as you, though. Nobody could ever replace you.”

“Of course not,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “I am the best.”

“That you are,” Oliver confirmed and kissed the side of her neck. 

Felicity turned her head to smile at him and Oliver pecked her lips shortly. 

“Do you have decided what to do with the baby’s nursery yet?” Lyla asked, pushing a grape into her mouth. “The last time we talked you seemed a little undecided.”

Oliver sighed. “We had some heated discussions-“

“-before Oliver gave in,” Felicity finished his sentence. 

“Only because I felt there was no reason in continuing to discuss this with you as you didn’t seem to be open for any of my arguments.”

“Because your arguments were crappy,” Felicity said. 

She didn’t have to see it to know that he was rolling his eyes, and Felicity slapped his shoulder playfully. Oliver only chuckled, lifting her hand and kissed the back of it.

“So what exactly did you decide on?” John asked. 

“We are going to do some renovations in February,” Felicity explained, “to add another nursery and probably a little more room in general. We are going to expend the living room to have three more rooms upstairs.”

“Three?” Lyla asked. “You’re having triplets now?”

“Oh my god, no!” Felicity said firmly and Oliver chuckled in response. “We just felt it was a good opportunity to add a larger home office, so I can spend more time working from here and maybe a playroom for the kids.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” John said. 

“It is a good plan,” Felicity said, shooting a pointed look at Oliver.

“I never said it’s not a good plan. All I said is that we could have also used one of the guest rooms instead of making these huge renovations that will take a lot of time and probably stress.”

“Yeah, and what child would you have kicked out of the room because there is no way I am going downstairs every time the baby nights a midnight snack,” Felicity explained.

“William already volunteered.”

“Yeah, not happening.”

“I wouldn’t mind,” William said from the other side of the living room, but when Felicity shot him a look, he quickly added, “but of course it’s nicer to stay in my room.”

Felicity looked at Oliver and he rolled his eyes before chuckling. “You are glad I love you too much to discuss this all over again.”

“Especially because we could use a little more room,” Felicity added.

Oliver grumbled something before he pecked her lips once more. Felicity smiled at him and he winked in response.

“Well, if the renovations are too stressful for you, you can always come to us. We have a nice guest room,” John said. 

“Could you please not offer her to move out of here?” Oliver asked in mocking voice.

Felicity chuckled and patted his chest gently. “Don’t worry, hon. I wouldn’t leave you. I am spoilt by your cooking, but then again Lyla taught you, so maybe…”

Oliver grumbled something Felicity couldn’t understand and Felicity leaned back against him, winking at him to make sure he knew she was only making fun. Oliver grinned and kissed the tip of her nose. 

“Let’s hope the renovations even if huge won’t be too stressful,” she said.

“I guess the house was never planned for a big family,” Lyla said with a chuckle. 

“At least not for a big family like that,” Oliver replied. “It was more teasing than everything else, but now that we do have this big family, we probably really need a little more room and a new car.”

“But the good thing is that you can always drop your children here. We have so many that two more won’t even catch our eyes.”

“I hope it’s not going to be that crowded,” Oliver said with a chuckle. 

“Nah, we would probably notice that they aren’t ours,” Felicity said, making Lyla and John chuckle. “Speaking of your baby, do you already know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

“A boy,” Lyla said with a smile. “We asked during the last appointment.”

“Happy?” Oliver asked.

“We would have been happy either way.”

“Of course,” Oliver said. 

“What about you?” John asked. “Do you know the baby’s sex?”

“Nope,” Oliver and Felicity replied in chorus. 

“Still letting yourself be surprised like all the other times?” John asked.

“Felicity cheated during the pregnancy with Tommy,” Oliver said.

“Do I have to remind you on the debacle with the girl’s name?” Felicity asked.

Oliver cleared his throat, probably remembering as well as she did that they had finally agreed on a girl’s name when they had figured that one of the girls of Oliver’s past had had the same name and they had been forced to start thinking from new. A few days later Felicity had decided it was hopeless and called the doctor to take the pressure away since they had easily agreed on a boy’s name.

“So you don’t know if you want to know yet?” Lyla asked. 

Felicity shrugged her shoulders and looked at Oliver. “We haven’t really talked about it yet.”

“And there is still a lot of time to decide if we want to know,” Oliver replied, moving his hand over her stomach. 

“Absolutely,” Felicity agreed.

“Though if you have a boy, we should probably go for a boy, too,” Oliver whispered not quietly enough for John, Lyla and Felicity not to hear. When Felicity turned her head, perking up her eyebrows, Oliver lifted his hands innocently. “I am just thinking pragmatically. They are most likely going to become best friends then just like Emmy and Sara. If we have a girl…”

“They could fall in love,” Felicity whispered. “Shocking.”

“Let’s not think about that before the baby is even born, okay?”

Felicity chuckled. “I think now I really want to have a boy.”

Oliver frowned. “What is that with your love to disagree with me lately?”

“I don’t know. It’s just fun,” Felicity replied with a shrug of her shoulders and chuckled. She straightened up and kissed the underside of his jaw. “But don’t worry. I am sure we are still agreeing on the important things.”

Oliver tightened his arm around her, pulling her even closer. He rested his chin on her shoulder and whispered, “As long as you’re feeling better, you can disagree with me on everything.”

Felicity stroked her hand up and down Oliver’s arm, leaning her cheek against his head. She shot a short look to Lyla and John, seeing them holding each other’s hand and sharing a look like they were sharing their relief that they weren’t being put through this and their worry about not being able to help their friends. Felicity bit her bottom lip, thinking about what to say. She didn’t want her depression to take over this fun day, especially when it wasn’t as present right now. 

She didn’t come up with anything, but luckily she had kids to make up for her lack of idea.

“Mommy,” Tommy complained, “Millie is sticking her finger into my nose.”

Everyone turned to him, watching Millie indeed trying to stick her finger into Tommy’s nose. She released an unhappy cry when Tommy tried to keep her finger away. Everyone laughed in amusement and Felicity quickly crawled over to pull her baby girl into her lap. The tension was eased and their afternoon went back to the fun it had been before. 

Felicity enjoyed the time with their friends, wishing there could be more like these. Well, she could prepare herself for another down-spiral and yet be hopeful for better times, right?


	213. Endless love

He quickly put on his pullover and briefly moved his fingers through his short hair to make sure he was looking alright before he turned around to go. Stepping into the door between their bedroom and the en suite bathroom, he leaned against the wooden frame. He cocked his head and crossed his arms in front of his chest as he took Felicity in carefully.

She was sitting at the edge of the bed in a tight-fitting, blue dress that accentuated the round baby bump perfectly. Her eyes were focused on the task of putting on her tights, making sure she wasn’t going to leave any runs in the thin fabric, but it didn’t hide how tired she looked. She had done her best to hide the dark shadows under her eyes with makeup, but Oliver knew her too well to not see them nonetheless. She had barely eaten today, had no time to nap and been on her feet almost all the time. What was an easy thing for Felicity to handle when she was healthy, was straining her in the current situation.

“Enjoying the view, Mr. Queen?” Felicity asked, looking up from the tights in her hands when she lifted her foot to slip into the fabric. She was smiling at him, but her eyes betrayed her. If the way she quickly focused back on putting on the tights was any indication, she didn’t miss it, either. She cleared her throat, stating, “Give me three more minutes and I am ready to go.”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed. Pressing his lips together firmly and biting his lip, he thought about the best way to say what he was thinking or whether to say it at all actually. Deciding that it was probably best to address this carefully, he said, “Emmy and Tommy told me that you’ve been going to the playground with them earlier?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, getting up to pull the tights over her hips. “Millie needed fresh air, so I figured the playground was a good idea to get Emmy and Tommy to join me.”

“They had a really good time.”

“Yeah, they seemed to enjoy it,” Felicity responded.

When she bent down to grab her shoes, Oliver quickly stepped forward. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he pulled her close. Felicity put her hands to his elbows, cocking her head and frowning slightly. Oliver just smiled in response, stroking the knuckles of his fingers over her soft cheek, and Felicity took his hand, holding it to the side of her face and leaning into the touch. Still smiling, Oliver leaned forward and kissed her forehead.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay here and rest a little?” he asked in a whisper.

Felicity bent her head back a little, looking at him intently. “Oliver, it’s the first parents’ evening at Emmy’s preschool since the school year started. It’s important. I can’t miss that.”

“I am going,” Oliver replied, “which means we are not going to miss it.”

“ _You_ would not going to miss it,” Felicity objected. “ _I_ would.”

Before Oliver got the chance to say anything more, Felicity pulled away from him. She grabbed her shoes and put them on, holding onto his shoulder for balance. Moving her hand down his arm and squeezing his hand shortly, she walked past him to the small dresser and took a look into her purse to probably make sure that she had everything she needed.

Turning around to him, she said, “I am ready to leave.”

Oliver nodded slowly, pushing his hands into the pocket of his pants and following her downstairs. While Felicity went to say goodbye to the kids and Donna, who was babysitting them tonight, Oliver put on his coat. When he heard Felicity coming back, he grabbed her coat and helped her into it.

He could see that she was exhausted and tired. He would actually make a bet that she was having a backache and probably a headache, too. Felicity had been feeling a lot better lately. She hadn’t been so tired and exhausted that she had needed to spend most of the time in bed. Yet Oliver was sure that being alone with the kids all day and taking them to the playground where he knew Emmy and Tommy quickly got overexcited had left its marks on her, especially because he knew that there had been no time for a nap since Millie had refused to sleep when Felicity had lay her down.

He wanted to believe that she was okay and going to this evening with a lot of probably exhausting parents – Felicity had told him that she didn’t consider herself what teachers would probably think was an exhausting parent, hadn’t been able to say the exact same about him, though – wasn’t going to exhaust her any more, but Oliver just wasn’t sure. He knew Felicity. He knew how the depression was working on her, as much as someone who wasn’t her could understand it. He knew that she was exhausted, but she was pushing herself through things because she was guilting herself into it, feeling she was a bad mother or a bad wife or a bad person if she didn’t. He also knew that there was little to nothing he could do about it, but he felt that the least he had to do was try. Felicity was already on her way to the door when Oliver quickly stepped forward and barred the way.

Felicity sighed. “What, Oliver?”

“Emmy has more than ten years of school still ahead of her,” Oliver explained, “and there are three more kids that will have their first parents’ evening. Not going to this one is not a bad thing, especially because you wouldn’t be going because you just don’t want to or because you don’t care. You wouldn’t be going because you are pregnant and you are sick and you need the rest.”

He gave her an encouraging look, making sure she knew that he meant it. Felicity perked up her eyebrows.

“Are you finished?” she asked and Oliver sighed, knowing that he hadn’t convinced her yet, but he gave her a nod nonetheless. “Great. I heard you and I disagree with you, so I guess we can go now.”

She tried to push past him, but Oliver refused to get out of the way. He would try once more before he would give up. He gave Felicity a look, asking for her to listen, and she sighed, once again crossing her arms in front of her chest as she waited for him to speak.

“On our wedding day, you made me promise to always see my partner in you,” he said. “I do. I do see my partner in you because we are partners and that is not just in the field. We are partners here at home, too, and as your partner I know that you are not okay and I am asking you to get the rest you need and deserve and let me take care of our parental duties for the both of us tonight. Marriage is about leaning on each other. I often had my troubles with it, especially at the beginning, because I was used to doing things alone, but I learned that I can lean on you and that I have to lean on you, especially when I am not feeling okay. That is why I am asking you to please lean on me now and let me handle this parents’ evening, so you can rest.”

When he stopped, Felicity had her jaws clenched. Tears were welling in her eyes and he was sure that it was angry tears. Her bottom lip was trembling slightly. He felt sorry for her, he really did, but Oliver felt deep in his heart that it was better for Felicity to stay here than putting herself through meeting all the other parents and having to put up with the questions of the pushy ones. If she really felt like he was wrong, all she had to do was telling him so now, and he’d shut up immediately.

“Fine,” she said eventually, almost spitting the word out, before she turned around on her heels and walked upstairs.

Oliver leaned back against the door with a sigh, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment. He knew how much Felicity hated when other people, even if it was him, told her what they thought was best for her. He understood that. He had always hated it, too. Back in the years when the trauma the island had left him with had been more present, he had often tried to push himself to what he thought he had to do and often Felicity had asked him to stop for a second and consider not doing it because maybe he wasn’t in the right place for it. Oliver had hated it, but eventually he had discovered that Felicity just knew him in his bones and when she said he shouldn’t push himself than it was only because she wanted the best for him.

“Hey, you’re still here,” Donna pulled him from his thoughts when she was coming from the living room.

“Yes, but I am on my way out,” he replied. “Felicity is going to stay home, though.”

Donna perked up her eyebrows in surprise. She approached him and shot a look back over her shoulder towards the stairs before she whispered, “She didn’t look good tonight. I asked her if she didn’t want to stay home, but she was so driven to go…”

Oliver sighed. “I… asked her not to go. She is probably mad as hell as me, but that is something I can deal with. I rather have her being mad at me than feeling worse again. Besides, if she can blame me for not going that means she can’t make herself feel guilty about it, so I consider it a win. I hate when she’s mad at me, but it’s better than when she’s mad at herself.”

Donna smiled, putting a hand to his arm and stroking it up and down comfortingly. “She isn’t going to stay mad long. She knows you only want to help her and you are doing an amazing job at doing so.”

“I hope so.”

“I know it for the both of us,” Donna replied. She straightened up onto her toes and kissed his cheek. “Felicity is lucky to have you.”

“I am lucky to have her,” Oliver responded with a smile. “I gotta go. It won’t take too long.”

“Don’t worry. I’ve got everything handled,” Donna promised him.

Oliver opened the door, saying back over his shoulder, “I have no doubt about that.”

 

 

Felicity woke up when the door to the bedroom opened. She held her breath, listening to Oliver tiptoeing towards the en suit bathroom. Only when she heard the rushing of water, did she take a look at the clock on her nightstand. Ten-thirty.

She must have fallen asleep because the last time she had taken a look at the clock it hadn’t even been nine. Her headache had ceased, the loud pounding in her head that had accompanied her all day today gone, and her back didn’t ache as badly as it had before. She was sure that with the warmth of Oliver’s chest pressing to her back when he’d come to bed would make the rest of the pain go away.

When the mattress behind her dipped a few minutes later, though, Oliver stayed on his side instead of rolling over and snuggling up to her. Usually she was sleeping on her back with Oliver lying on top of her and his head resting on the top of her breasts, so he could listen to her heartbeat. Over the years that had become their most common position when sleeping. When she was pregnant, though, they always slept on their sides, sometimes facing each other and sometimes with his chest pressing to her back.

Felicity bit her tongue, knowing that he was most likely just wanting to give her room in case she was still mad at him. She had been mad, really mad at him actually. While she had changed into her pajamas, washed her face and brushed her teeth, she had been thinking about all the ways she would punish him for what she felt had been emotionally blackmailing her into not going to that parents’ evening. Her ideas of punishment had ranged from never having sex with him again to throwing Millie’s full diapers at him when she next saw him. As soon as she had been lying in bed under the thick blanket, she had known that he had been right and she really had needed the rest, so most of her anger had just vanished.

Releasing a low sigh, Felicity scooted back in bed until her butt met Oliver’s hip. She reached out her hand behind her until she found his fingers on his stomach and tugged on his hand until he rolled onto his side and snuggled impossible close to her. His chest pressed to her back and his hand stroked over the baby bump gently. When Felicity laced her fingers through his, Oliver kissed her shoulder and rested his head in the crook of her neck and shoulder, his stubble gently scratching her delicate skin. She moved her cold toes against his calves and he grunted slightly, but he didn’t pull his warm legs away.

“On a scale from zero to ten how mad are you?” he whispered.

“Maybe one.”

“One? I would have bet it was at least fifteen.”

Felicity chuckled. “I’d say right after you left it was a legit twenty.”

“And then?”

“Then I lay down in bed and realized how tired and exhausted I really was and how right you were about me better staying home.”

“I was a little worried given after what happened with William you told me that I need to trust you when you tell me that you can handle something, but-“

“You just knew better this time,” Felicity said, “and you weren’t overprotective or something. You had reasonable doubt about my decision and asked me to step back.”

“I wouldn’t have suggested for you to stay home if it was any different and I hadn’t thought that really it was better for you to stay home. I thought about whether or not to talk to you about it all day, but you looked so miserable and I just...” Oliver stopped and kissed her shoulder once more. “I would have loved for you to be there and make fun of the pushy parents with me afterwards, but…”

“You just knew better,” Felicity sighed.

“I wish I hadn’t and I wish I had been wrong,” Oliver explained.

Felicity nodded slowly. “I know. I hate that you were right… kind of.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered in response, tightening his arm around her. “To be fair, you know me better than I know myself a lot of times, too, especially when I am not feeling alright. Ask me how many times I would like to make you shut up when you advise me to do something that would help me, but that I don’t want to be true, especially when it was about taking a step back and resting. Eventually I realized that you just knew me so well and with the little distance you have you sometimes have the more reasonable idea of what’s good for me, so I figured since I love you and I know you, maybe this time it was me who should help you to see that you needed the rest.”

“Must be great to rub that in now then, hm?” Felicity asked.

Oliver hesitated before he asked, “How are you feeling now?”

Felicity smiled. Of course Oliver wouldn’t rub it in. She squeezed his fingers on her belly and snuggled a little closer to him. “A lot better.”

“Then I love rubbing it in,” Oliver told her teasingly.

Felicity chuckled. Okay, maybe he would rub it in as long as he felt that she was okay. She didn’t mind, though. Teasing each other had always been a part of their relationship. When Oliver peppered soft kisses up and down her neck and shoulder, Felicity smiled and released a content sigh.

“So how was the parents’ evening?” she asked him.

“It was okay. We had our five wonderfully couples of pushy parents there-“

“I would have liked to see them just to make fun of them,” Felicity said with a sigh before she frowned. “Are we terrible for making fun of them?”

“Well, we don’t make fun of them when they or anyone else is around, so…”

“Yeah, but we can be pushy parents, too.”

“Yes, we are pushy parents because we had two of our children abducted already and we both live in the kind of danger where our children’s lives might actually be threatened,” Oliver answered. “We are not worried that the teacher might not hold Emmy’s hand when she is walking down the hallway and that could cause her to fall and we aren’t pushing to have the climbing frame on the playground removed because we think she could break her neck.”

“I actually read that it happened to a five-year-old not that long ago,” Felicity explained.

Oliver released a long breath that ghosted over Felicity’s skin and elicited goosebumps on the top of her chest. He moved their linked fingers against her baby bump before he said, “Accidents can always happen. We and no other parent can protect their children from everything. If we don’t allow them to play on a climbing frame, then they are playing with a ball that hits their head and then they stumble back and hit their head against a stone. It can happen and yet nobody would forbit their kids to play with a ball. You know that I am all in for being careful, but fear can’t control our or our children’s lives.”

Felicity smiled, lifting their linked fingers to kiss the palm of Oliver’s hand, before she put his hand back to her baby bump. “It’s barely believable that these words come from the same man who has been pushing me away, thinking his life was too dangerous.”

“Admittedly, I am hardly that man anymore,” Oliver replied.

“You are always my Oliver.”

Felicity could feel him smiling against her shoulder and it made her smile, too. She squeezed his hand once more before she asked, “Did Ms. Anderson say anything about Emmy?”

“I talked to her about her and she said Emmy is smart and lovely but very stubborn, so nothing new really,” he replied with a chuckle.

“So she is getting along well?”

“It sounds like it.”

“Good,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “The depression started so soon after she started preschool that really I was worried I could miss anything that might be going on with her.”

“Our kids know that they can trust us,” Oliver explained. “They’d come to us and if they feel they couldn’t come to us, they’d go to their godparents because we chose those wisely, too.”

Felicity sighed. “Yeah, you are probably right.”

“God, I need to mark this day in my calendar,” Oliver explained with a chuckle. “Two ‘you are right’s in less than fifteen minutes.”

“Hey, I always admit when I am wrong and you are right,” Felicity told him, adding in a mumble that was just loud enough for him to hear, “It’s not my fault you are always in the wrong.”

Oliver started tickling her sides and Felicity laughed, kicking around to try and make him stop, but Oliver kept her against him and continued to tickle her wildly. Felicity begged him to stop, but he refused until she was completely out of breath.

“Oh my god,” Felicity said, holding a hand against her wildly beating heart. “I don’t remember when I had this much fun the last time.”

Oliver pressed his face against the side of her neck and took in a deep breath. Felicity squeezed his hand on her baby belly, not saying a word. She knew that he suffered from the way she suffered with this depression. It had been better lately, but she was prepared for it to stay a little longer. It was already burdening her for longer than the last depression had and whenever she thought it was getting better, it came just crushing back over her. She gave them this moment of quiet, not wanting to break it.

Only when she felt the quiet was turning into heaviness, she asked teasingly, “So… I guess all the single mothers used my absence to slip you their numbers?”

“You are misjudging my effect on women,” Oliver said gently.

Felicity pressed her lips together. “Some of the taken women tried the same, right?”

Oliver chuckled. “Of course.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, shaking her head. She really couldn’t be mad. Oliver was quite attractive and also caring and loved children with all his heart. He’d be the perfect fit for every single mother if he wasn’t very much happily married with her.

“I really can’t let you go anywhere alone,” Felicity sighed dramatically. “Good thing I know you have really great reflexes and know how to get your way out of their clutches.”

Oliver stayed silent for a moment before he cleared his throat. “I have to admit that I was a little distracted with wondering which of my body parts you were going to cut off when I come back home. After all, I still thought you were mad at me.”

Felicity turned her head, looking at Oliver in the dark. She couldn’t see much of him, but she knew that he could see very well in the dark, so she was sure that he could see her mockingly narrowed eyes.

“What exactly are you trying to say?”

“That I might have a bunch of phone numbers in the pocket of my pants and the remains of a number written to my hand that I just couldn’t get washed away?”

“Unbelievable,” Felicity whispered dramatically. “How could you?”

“Like I said, missing body parts were my worry much more than annoying women were and I just hadn’t had any energy to fight them off and then have them trying harder and me trying harder to make them stop nonetheless,” Oliver explained and kissed her cheek, “but you can gladly burn the papers with the numbers tomorrow and then dance around the fire and curse all the women who slipped me their numbers.”

“Oh, absolutely,” Felicity replied.

“And I will get up half an hour earlier tomorrow to wash the last hints of that number on my hand away,” Oliver added.

“Don’t worry about that,” she told him, patting his hand. “I’m just gonna cut it off tomorrow.”

“Don’t you think that’s a little bit too dramatic?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “That will hopefully teach you better than to be distracted when other women are hitting on you in the future.”

“And how are we going to keep saving the city if I only have one hand?” Oliver asked.

“Oh, honey, I am a genius in the technology world. I am going to invent the most lifelike prosthesis. You won’t even realize you are missing a hand except for the occasional phantom pain.” Felicity sighed, a wide grin playing on her lips. “You know, I would even honor that work to you since you would have inspired me to it.”

“If that’s the case, I’m all in for you cutting off my hand,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“Glad we could agree on that,” Felicity said, releasing a long yawn.

He pulled the blanket higher and kissed her shoulder. “It’s late. We should catch some sleep.”

“You’re right,” Felicity told him, stroking her hand over his. “Tomorrow is a big day for you. You should be well-rested when I cut your hand off.”

Felicity could feel him smile against her skin. He pressed his nose to the side of her neck and breathed her in, stroking his hand up and down Felicity’s baby bump.

“Good night, Felicity,” he whispered and kissed the soft spot right under her ear.

Felicity sighed contently. “Good night, Oliver.”


	214. Nagging voice

“Millie, mommy can run a bath for you. You don’t have to climb into the washing machine,” Felicity said with a chuckle when she came back into the laundry room and watched her youngest daughter sitting in front of the washing machine with her head stuck into it. Millie squealed happily, crawling over to one of the full hampers and starting to take the clothes out and put them on the floor. Felicity smiled. “You want to help mommy with the laundry? That’s so nice of you.”

Felicity went down on her knees to help Millie, having trouble to actually get down safely. Her baby bump had grown a lot lately, overnight actually. Shirts that had only strained around her middle yesterday pressed at her baby bump too much to feel comfortable now. She had dug out her maternity clothes from her pregnancy with Millie. She had kept them to hand them over to Thea one day soon, but they did serve their purpose for her once more now. She had still settled for one of Oliver’s simple white shirts this morning, though. She loved wearing his clothes, even more when she was pregnant.

It wasn’t long until Tommy and Emmy came in.

“Can we help, too?” Tommy asked.

“Sure,” Felicity replied, scooting closer to Millie to make room for Emmy and Tommy. “The more you help, the less work mommy has to do.”

The two kneeled down around the hamper and Emmy asked, “And what do we have to do, Mommy?”

“You just check the pockets of the clothes to make sure there is nothing in there,” Felicity replied, pulling out one of her jeans to demonstrate what the meant.

Emmy and Tommy didn’t need to be told twice, immediately starting to help their mother. Felicity watched the kids checking every pocket, no matter how small. She loved when the kids helped her with the chore. She knew that with some things she was just a lot faster when she did them herself, but it was just much more fun doing it together and the fact that they helped willingly just warmed her heart.

“Where’s Aunt Laurel?” Emmy asked.

“She has to work today,” Felicity replied with a smile. “She might come less often in general now, though.”

“Are you feeling better?”

Felicity smiled, nodding her head. “Yes, I think so.”

“That’s good,” Emmy replied, her face brightening with a wide smile.

Felicity and Oliver had told the kids that Laurel was spending so much time here with them as long as Felicity was having trouble with health. Lately Felicity had felt a lot better, though. She still had low days and she was still more worried about the future than she felt she should be, but she also felt like she was ready to claim her life back step by step. It was going to be a process and there were certainly going to be days that she would have to accept a step back, but if the overall movement continued to be a one forward and she stayed realistic about her recovery Felicity felt like she was on a good way.

The four of them continued to check the clothes for any forgotten things in the pockets when Tommy pulled a piece of paper out of the one of Oliver’s jeans in his hands.

“See?” Felicity asked. “That is why we always check the pockets before washing the clothes. Someone always forgets something in there and then they end up in the washing machine and they are destroyed.”

Tommy handed Felicity the paper and she was already stretching out her arm to put it on the washing machine when she noticed the lavish handwriting in the red color. Frowning, she unfolded the piece of paper to take a look at what was written on it and immediately regretting it. The name Alice Clark was written under the phone number.

Alice Clark was the mother of one of Emmy’s classmates and she was without any doubt the hottest mother in class. When all the parents had met the week before kindergarten had started for the kids, she had easily caught all the father’s attention. She was a looker with her long legs and well-defined curves. Besides, as a former model she knew exactly how to draw attention by moving her body just the right way and she enjoyed the attention she still attracted easily despite not being on a catwalk anymore.

Felicity shook her head, putting the paper away on the washing machine. Oliver had told her that during that parents’ evening last week a few of the mother’s might have snuck him their numbers. Apparently, they had mistaken her absence for a sign that things between her and Oliver weren’t working out when really she had just stayed home because she had been tired and exhausted and Oliver had eventually convinced her to get some rest.

_He promised you he’d trash all the numbers, though,_ a little voice said in her head.

Grabbing some of the clothes, Felicity turned towards the washing machine and pushed them into the loader. Oliver must have missed this one paper when he had trashed them. Knowing that, just like Alice Clark was the hottest mother in class, he was the hottest father, he had certainly got a lot of offers and because of that might have missed that one paper.

_Really? The one number he misses is the one of the hottest mom? Sounds a little too suspicious to be an accident, isn’t it?_

Felicity sighed. When she had been younger, she had often had this nagging voice inside of her head. Well, it was her own voice, not like a stranger’s voice in her head. She wasn’t crazy. She was just kind of insecure sometimes or at least she had been when she had been younger. After her dad had left, she had felt like nothing she was doing had been good enough and as much as she had tried to tell herself that she was doing everything she could, she hadn’t been able to shake off the voice that was telling her she was failing nonetheless.

She had gotten rid of that voice almost completely. It was continuing to show up at really rough times like when some problems during the development of that biochip had occurred. Usually she was able to handle the doubts it was trying to cast in her abilities and her happiness. She wasn’t the little girl that was insecure after being abandoned by her father, not anymore. She hadn’t been in a long time actually.

The fact that it was Alice Clark’s of all numbers was a stupid coincidence and absolutely nothing to worry about. With her brown hair she wasn’t even really Oliver’s type.

_Uhm… Laurel had brown hair when they were together, so did Sara when they went on the Gambit together. Samantha and the Huntress both had brown hair. McKenna had dark hair. Looks like if there is something that is not his type then it’s actually blonde hair._

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. Maybe most of the girls Oliver had been with had had dark hair, but it didn’t matter anyway. Oliver loved her and if there was one thing she was sure of in this world than it was that. There was really nothing that could ever made her doubt that Oliver loved her and only her.

_Like you need love to have sex!_

Now this really was just ridiculous. Oliver wasn’t the guy he used to be back before the Gambit. He didn’t cheat anymore. He had never felt comfortable or even just smug about it and he had clearly learned from his past mistakes. He’d never hurt her like that.

_Well…_

He wouldn’t! It was actually one more thing she was sure of and that didn’t allow any objection. Oliver loved her and he’d never cheat on her. Besides, what reason should he have? They had amazing sex and that on a quite regular basis and-

_Regular basis? Are you sure about that?_

Setting up the program for the washing machine, Felicity faltered for a moment as she was trying to figure out when they had last had sex. Usually the answer would be that it was less than seven days ago, but Felicity was very sure that they hadn’t had sex this week or the last week or even the week before that to be honest.

She felt her heart skipping a beat before it started racing in her chest when she realized that they hadn’t had sex since she had discovered that she was pregnant again. It was that very day that they had last had sex or at least Oliver had eaten her out. They had planned on delaying his release to the evening when she was back from Lyla’s pregnancy test party, but everything had come different when she had realized that she was pregnant, too.

Felicity was eighteen weeks along now which meant she and Oliver hadn’t had sex in more than three months. That was probably the longest time they had ever gone without sex. Even around the times of their children’s birth it hadn’t taken so long between the last time they had had sex before and the first time after the birth. Three months was a really long time, especially for them.

Yet it couldn’t be. Oliver wasn’t like that. He wouldn’t just go and have sex with the first woman who was willing, even if she was the hottest mom possible.

“Everything alright, Mommy?” Emmy asked.

Felicity turned around with a smile. “Yes, of course. How about we go into the kitchen and get us some ice cream? I think we have to reward ourselves for doing the laundry!”

“Yes!” Tommy said, immediately jumping off the floor and running ahead of them.

Felicity lifted Millie from the floor and into her arms, kissing her baby’s rosy cheek. Emmy put the pants Tommy had just dropped carelessly in his haste to get into the kitchen.

“You really okay?” Emmy asked.

Felicity smiled, stroking a hand over her oldest daughter’s head. “Yes, everything’s alright. I was just feeling like we could all need a break from the laundry and I was craving some ice cream.”

“You or the baby?” Emmy asked with a happy giggle, hugging Felicity’s round belly.

“Probably both of us,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, took Emmy’s hand and led her out of the laundry room.

Ice cream would be a good distraction and with a little sugar in her body she would also get back her hold on that nagging voice in her head. Everything would be much easier then.

_Maybe, but that is only ignoring the problem. Better think about it carefully. You don’t want to be one of the women that are too stupid to realize they are being cheated on._

 

 

When Oliver came back home, everything in the house was dark already. Glancing at his watch, he really wasn’t surprised, but it had been worth it. After days of juggling with how to make more time for his family without losing control over the company and all the progression it had made under Felicity’s care, he had finally been able to put all the pieces of his plans together. He had handed some tasks over to the heads of the respective departments since they knew what to do better than he did anyway.

As soon as Felicity would go back to work, she could take back all control and continue to bring the company forward. Oliver had never had the power to do that. All he had been doing had been trying to keep the company from losing itself in chaos without Felicity. Thanks to her amazing work and the capable people she had hired there was little to no risk that this would happen anyway, though.

Starting next week, he’d do all paper work from home and just check on the company every other week. He knew he could trust the people who were in control now to do their best. Besides, he had Curtis and Felicity’s assistant Emily at location to keep him informed about everything he could possibly miss. If there was a crisis, he’d be there in a heartbeat. He just doubted that would ever be the case.

Instead of heading right into his bedroom, Oliver made a detour to check on the kids. He pulled the blanket higher over Tommy’s body, kissing his cheek. He stroked his fingertips through Millie’s curly hair and finally adjusted Emmy’s sleeping position since her feet were outside of the bed and her head under the pillow, her limbs weirdly stretched out.

“Just like your mommy,” he whispered with a smile and made sure she was safely tugged under the blanket before he left her room again.

He opened the door to their bedroom quietly and shot a look towards the bed to check if Felicity was still away, but she was lying under the blanket unmoving. He watched her for a moment when he figured that maybe she was a little too unmoving. Her breathing was too shallow for someone who was deeply asleep. He could barely see it in the low light that came from the hallway.

“Felicity, you’re awake?” Oliver asked in a whisper, not wanting to wake her in case he was wrong.

When Felicity didn’t answer, just taking in a deep breath, he smiled. He remembered when they had first gotten together and started spending nights together that he had woken up in the middle of the night to just listen to her breathing. He also remembered almost freaking out when she had barely breathed one night and he had woken her up in panic only to learn that she had sleep apnea when being really stressed. He still pinched her side lightly whenever it happened, not enough to really wake her up but enough to get a reaction. Fortunately, it didn’t happen too often.

Oliver was already on his way to the bathroom when he noticed the jeans lying on his bed. He grabbed them when passing by and sighed when a paper fell out of the pocket. He bent down and picked it up, grinning when he found that it was the number Alice Clark had slipped him during the parents’ evening last week. He must have missed that one when he had been trashing all of them.

Turning his wedding band around his ring finger, Oliver puckered his lips. Why did some people still seem to have trouble respecting that he was a married man or even worse that he wasn’t the guy he used to be when he was much younger? He shot a look towards Felicity, cocking his head as he was watching her sleep. She was the only woman for him and nobody would ever change that, not even a former supermodel.

Releasing a low sigh, Oliver went into the bathroom, put his pants into the hamper there and trashed the piece of paper with the number. Then he quickly washed his face, took off his clothes and slipped into some sweatpants he liked to sleep in when he didn’t just sleep in his boxer briefs. After brushing his teeth, he went back into the dark bedroom.

Oliver crawled into bed and lay down under the blanket, scooting closer to Felicity until his chest rested against his back. He bent one arm, using it as a pillow for his head and wrapped his other arm around Felicity’s waist. His hand rested on the baby bump, stroking up and down slowly. He ducked his head a little, pushing his nose into Felicity’s hair and breathed her in, immediately feeling his heartbeat slowing down and his thoughts coming to rest.

He had just closed his eyes when Felicity shifted in his arms. She turned around until her front pressed to his. Her hand stroked up and down his back, gently scratching the scarred tissues there. She leaned her head forward and kissed the underside of his jaw.

“Did I wake you up?” Oliver whispered.

“Maybe,” Felicity replied.

“Sorry.” Oliver kissed the top of her head. “Didn’t mean to do so.”

“It’s okay,” Felicity replied, moving her hand from his back over his hip to his chest and spreading her fingers against his abs. “You’ve been late today.”

“Yeah, I had some work to do,” Oliver explained.

“So late?” He couldn’t see Felicity’s face, but he could feel her body tensing slightly and her fingers’ movements faltering. “Any problems?”

“No, don’t worry. It’s quite the opposite actually.”

“Which means?”

“That you are in for a surprise tomorrow,” Oliver replied and stroked his hand over her back.

“Why don’t you tell me now?” Felicity asked, but before Oliver even got the chance to explain to her that he wanted to show rather than just tell her, she quickly said, “Just forget the question.”

Oliver frowned, tightening his arm around her. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Felicity hurried to say. “Sure.”

“Really?” Oliver asked, applying gentle pressure to her lower back because he knew it always hurt slightly there. “You seem a little-“

He didn’t get to end his sentence. Felicity rested her head back, cupping his face in her hand at the same time and kissed him. She lost no time opening his lips to the touch of her tongue. Oliver sighed into the kiss, keeping his arm around her loosely to give her the chance of pulling back at any time. With the depression and the pregnancy and everything that was going on in her head and the rest of body currently, Felicity wasn’t really feeling any desire for sex or hot make-out sessions.

Maybe today was different, though, Oliver thought to himself when Felicity climbed on top of him. She straddled his lap, her hips moving on top of his. Slowly Oliver let his hands stroke from her back down her sides over her hips to her legs. He moved his fingertips over the naked skin of her thighs hesitantly and immediately pulled them away when Felicity tensed slightly abode him. She didn’t stop, though, and despite the tension that was still in her body, she pulled his hands back to her thighs.

Oliver squeezed her thighs gently, keeping his hands at her knees, only rubbing small circles into her skin. There was no reason to rush and there was no time to push anything. If Felicity wanted to try for more intimacy, Oliver was all in for that. If she figured that she wasn’t comfortable with it, then that was okay, too.

When Felicity reached for the waistband of his sweatpants, Oliver caught her hands and put them back to his chest, whispering between two kisses, “Slow down. There is no rush.”

Felicity didn’t seem in for slowing things down, though. Her hips moved against his frantically and her hands moved from his chest back down to the waistband of his sweatpants, untying the bow on the front. When her fingers played around the waistband of the boxer briefs beneath the sweatpants, she deepened the kiss, bending his head back take over control and Oliver let her gladly.

It was only when he felt a tear dropping to his cheek that he realized something was going terribly wrong. Gently taking hold of Felicity’s wrists, he pushed her hands away from his lap.

“Felicity, what’s going on?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Felicity replied. “I just want you.”

She scooted back closer to him, once again starting to kiss him, even more desperately than before this time. Oliver put his hands to her hips and pushed her away carefully until she was sitting at the middle of his thigh. He then reached out his hand and switched on the light at his nightstand. Turning back to Felicity, he felt his heart stumble in his chest. Tears were welling in her eyes and there was an expression of sadness there that he had barely ever seen on her.

“Felicity, what’s going on?” Oliver asked once more.

“Nothing,” Felicity just replied again.

Oliver cocked his head and reached out his hand to cup Felicity’s cheek, but she caught his hand midair and put it to her thigh.

“Can’t we just have sex now?” she asked.

“No, especially not like this.”

He regretted whatever it was about his answer that upset her immediately because he could see the hurt in her face.

“Felicity…”

She didn’t give him the chance to explain that he needed to know what was going on with her before they could do anything because he felt like she wasn’t comfortable with what they were doing. Before Oliver could have said anything, Felicity was already on her feet and hurrying towards the bathroom, her body trembling slightly. She closed the door behind her, locking herself in.

It took Oliver another second that he was wondering what had just happened and what was going on here before he rolled out of bed and approached the bathroom door. He leaned against it, squeezing his eyes shut when he heard the quiet cries that were coming from behind the door.

He tapped his fingertips against the wood lightly, asking with gentle voice, “Felicity, please open the door.”

What had happened? Felicity had been so much better lately. She had been less tired, less exhausted. It had looked so good and though he had told himself not to hope for the depression to be over, he had hoped so for Felicity. He knew how much it burdened her and how much she suffered from it.

They had managed their way through this phase as good as they had been able to Oliver thought. They had learned from their past mistakes when neither of them had known what had been going on and when Felicity had pushed him away and he had let her. This time they had both done their best to be open with each other and lean on each other. He knew something must have happened today that had brought this on and he wanted to know what it was, so they could work through it like they always worked through things.

Oliver doubted that Felicity was ready to talk, though. She needed time for herself, so he would respect that and just make her know that he was here, ready to talk whenever she was ready.

“Okay, I am just going to sit down here in front of the door and wait,” Oliver stated, sitting down with his back against the doorframe. He could still hear her cry and leaned his head against the door, rubbing his hand over his heart to stop the drumming pain in his chest. If Felicity suffered, so did he. It was something that would never change. “I am here, Felicity. Whenever you are ready, I am here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This could also be titled "What happens when you lose yourself in worst case scenarios" which happens to me particularly often, so now it will happen to Felicity. Don't worry, it's going to be resolved in the next chapter already and then we are step by step moving closer to happy times.


	215. Understanding

Oliver waited. It had been almost an hour since Felicity had locked herself in the en suite bathroom. Her cries had almost completely lapsed into silence by now. He could still hear her taking in slightly sniffling breaths every once in a while, though. The entire time neither of them had said a word. Oliver wasn’t sure if she was ready to talk yet or if she was just waiting for him to make the first move or if she needed more time, so he just waited until he was sure. He didn’t want to urge her.

He used the time to think about what might have possibly happened that had let them to this moment that they were sitting on opposite sides of the bathroom door in the middle of the night. He wondered if the pants with Alice Clark’s number in the pocket had anything to do with it, but Felicity knew some women had slipped him his number and it hadn’t been a problem. They had actually made jokes about it because Felicity knew that there was nothing going on between him and any other women. She knew how much he loved her. As much as he was trying to understand it, he felt he was missing the most important pieces that he would need to put the puzzle together.

The situation weirdly reminded him of how Felicity had thought he wanted to break up with her when they had been together for only a little bit more than two months. She had thought that he was acting weird and jumped to the conclusion that he must have lost interest in her. The real reason why he had been acting weird, though, had been quite the opposite since he had actually been acting weird because he had been so nervous about planning on proposing.

The proposal had gone completely different than planned then. When Felicity had come back home from a shopping tour with Thea, who had been set up to distract Felicity during the days, so Oliver could have planned everything, he had done his best to convince her that he loved her and nothing about that had changed. He hadn’t been good with words back then, so he had whispered _I love you_ s into every inch of her skin while he had been making love to her, worshipping her body with all the love he had had in himself. He had watched her face screwed in pleasure, her boy moving in rhythm with his, and he hadn’t been able to hold the question back any longer.

Oliver chuckled quietly, rubbing his hands over his face. He doubted anyone who’d meet Felicity and him would think that the actual proposal had happened in the middle of coital bliss.

“What’s so funny?” Felicity asked quietly.

“Nothing, sorry,” Oliver was quick to reply, suddenly realizing that it must be weird for Felicity if he just started laughing in this situation. He didn’t want her to think that he was laughing about her or about her, so he added, “I was just thinking about the first time I proposed to you.”

“Back in your room in Roy’s and Thea’s loft?”

Oliver smiled. “That was the first time I proposed or do you want to tell me that I proposed to you in my sleep and you never told me?”

“No,” Felicity replied and Oliver could hear the small smile in her voice. “You just like to pretend the real proposal was the one at your family’s beach house.”

“Well, I put a lot more planning into that proposal,” Oliver explained, “and it was definitely much more the proposal you deserved.”

“I liked that first proposal.”

“So did I,” Oliver admitted before he grinned. “I’m glad we were both satisfied with it.”

There was a short pause before Felicity said, “I can’t believe you just said that.”

They both chuckled. It didn’t last long, but it took away a little bit of the tension that had filled the air since Felicity had locked herself in. Oliver took in a deep breath and looked at the door handle.

“Can you open the door, so we can talk?” he asked. “Please.”

It took a while before Felicity answered, “Can’t we talk like this?”

Oliver bit his tongue. He would like to look into Felicity’s face when they talked. It was easier to read her reactions then and to know if what he was saying was actually helping her or only making things worse. If she wasn’t ready for that yet, then they would have to feel their way to that. They just had to take one step at a time.

“So what-“ Oliver stopped, sucking in a deep breath and shooting a look towards the bed. “What happened there?”

Felicity didn’t answer. Oliver could hear her sucking in a deep breath like he had done before, though. He gave her time, waiting for her to be ready to tell him what had happened. Felicity stayed quiet, though.

“Felicity?” he whispered eventually.

“I’m… I’m thinking,” she replied.

Oliver nodded to himself. “Okay.”

It took a while longer before Felicity finally sighed and Oliver could almost see her squeezing her eyes shut.

“I found Alice Clark’s phone number in the pocket of your pants when I did the laundry earlier today,” Felicity whispered.

So it had had to do with that, Oliver thought to himself, not saying a word yet. He had wondered about that since the pants had been lying on his side of the bed almost like they had been put there on purpose. Oliver bit down on his tongue to keep himself from saying anything and waited for Felicity to continue. She didn’t say anything more, though.

“She slipped me her number during that parents’ evening last week. I told you about that,” he added gently, making sure it didn’t sound like a reproach because it wasn’t one. “I must have missed her number when I trashed them and-“

“I know,” Felicity interrupted him in a whisper. “You don’t need to explain anything.”

Oliver rubbed his thumb against his other fingertips nervously, unsure what to say. He knew from experience that sometimes you just got lost in a thought and in whatever worst case scenario you could draw from it. He remembered how hard it had been when he had been traveling to Central City every other weekend and he remembered how terrible he had felt about it. Then the photos of Ray and Felicity having dinner together had been published and he had completely freaked out, his judgement clouded by his insecurities and fears that Felicity could have found someone who could be a better husband, be there more often and offer all the things he couldn’t. The reproached he had confronted her with that night were definitely in his top three of regrets.

Felicity had stated more than once that the depression was messing with her head. She felt disconnected from herself and almost as insecure as she had been when she had been a little girl, still deeply affected by being abandoned by her father. He could see how her head might have gone down the road of imagining every worst case possible.

“Are you sure?” Oliver whispered. “Because I wouldn’t mind assuring to you that-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted him. “I… I have this little voice inside of my head that keeps trying to tell me that I am naïve for trusting you like that, but I do. I do trust you like that.”

Oliver frowned slightly. “Voice?”

“My voice,” Felicity was quick to explain. “It’s not a stranger’s voice or something. I am not crazy or-“

“I know,” Oliver interrupted her quickly before she could talk herself into a long ramble. “So a part of you is trying to cast doubts?”

“Kind of,” Felicity replied, “but I know you would never cheat on me.”

He wouldn’t and he knew Felicity knew, but he was glad she was saying it with that certainty nonetheless. Oliver pressed his lips together for a moment, biting his tongue. Despite his relief about her words, he hadn’t missed the little word that had resonated in her words.

“But?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity whispered, her voice sounding almost defeated. “I kind of feel like I am losing myself and like in those moments that I am losing myself I am also losing us.”

Oliver heard the sob coming from Felicity and he had to squeeze his eyes shut and take in a deep breath to stop the pain that was forming in his chest from taking over. Hearing Felicity saying these words hurt more than just knowing that they were true. He wished he could just wrap her into his arms and hold her until she was feeling better and feeling reconnected with herself again.

“I love you, Felicity,” he stated quietly, “and you might feel like you are losing yourself, but you are not. You are still Felicity. We are still Oliver and Felicity. Nothing between us has really changed, at least not if you ask me. We are getting through this together like we are always getting through everything together and nothing could ever change my feelings for you or-“

“We didn’t have sex in more than three months.”

Oliver felt his heart skipping a beat and pressed his lips together tightly. He felt like they were slowly starting to address the actual problem here. He took in a deep breath before sighing lowly.

“I know,” he whispered then. “So?”

“So?” she mimicked his voice after a moment. “Doesn’t that bother you at all?”

Oliver didn’t answer immediately, taking his time to think about how to reply honestly without deepening the insecurities Felicity seemed to have with the issue. Sex had never been an issue for them at all, at least none that they wouldn’t have been able to make fun of. During the last pregnancy, a year ago at this time actually, Felicity had gone into sexual overdrive to a point where Oliver had felt the need to ask her to decrease the number of sexy times. Felicity had used it to make a lot of jokes, still did so whenever she felt she could bring it up and it was okay because that was just a part of who they were.

“I love having sex with you,” Oliver said eventually, “but sex isn’t everything in our marriage. It’s-“

“It’s important,” Felicity interrupted him. “It’s important in our marriage.”

“It’s not that im-“

“Don’t tell me it’s not that important,” Felicity interrupted him firmly. “We usually have a lot of sex. We love having sex with each other. We are communicating through sex and it does take up a lot of our time. God, I gave you sex as a gift for your birthday and we have lists of unfulfilled sexual desires that we are working on whenever we get the chance to and we even traveled to Russia to fulfill one of those fantasies as realistically as possible. Sex _is_ really important in our marriage.”

“It is,” Oliver admitted after a short moment of consideration. “Sex is important in our marriage, but it’s not everything.”

Felicity didn’t reply anything, and Oliver shut his eyed for a moment to figure out how to best explain why not having sex lately didn’t bother him or didn’t even unsettle him. He had realized that they weren’t having sex. There was no denying that. He loved Felicity and he loved having sex with her, so it was hard to miss that they weren’t having sex right now, but it didn’t really bother him as much as Felicity seemed to think it might or even should bother him.

“I love you, Felicity,” he said with a low sigh, letting the intensity of his words spread in his chest, “and I love having sex with you. You are right. Sex is important because it’s a way for us to communicate. It’s not the only way we communicate, though. We have so many way of communicating with each other that really I am not worried if we communicate less through sex right now because we still have so many other ways to do so.”

He looked towards the bed once more, replaying what had happened there an hour ago in his head all over again. He still felt a little stitch in his chest when he remembered how betrayed Felicity had looked when he had stopped her from just continuing making out with her.

“I love having sex with you,” he repeated after a while, “and I certainly miss having sex with you, but the reason why our sex is so amazing is because we are both feeling so comfortable around each other. I don’t feel like I need to hide any piece of myself when we are being intimate and I hope that you feel the same way. I would never want our sex life to turn into a… a duty because it shouldn’t be. We should have sex because we are feeling comfortable around each other and because we want to have sex, not because we feel we have to.”

“I-“

“I know that you love me and I know that you love having sex with me,” Oliver interrupted her before she could say it because he just knew she was going to try to defend herself when really she had no reason to do so. “I also know that you aren’t quite feeling like yourself right now, so I guess it’s only natural to not feel any desire for sex. There are other things going on in your head. I don’t ever want you to feel like you have to have sex with me for whatever reason you might think that you do.“

There was a long silence and Oliver went through his words in his head once more, making sure they were saying what he had meant for them to say. He hoped Felicity understood them the way he had intended them, reassuring and soothing. Eventually, he leaned back against the door frame, looking at the closed door with held breath.

“What do you do when you feel the need for sex and I am not ready?” Felicity asked with whispered voice. “What if it will just take me too long?”

“Well, first of all I think I have proved to be able to not have sex for more than a couple of months since I did get lost for five years and did spend some of these in celibate. Same thing after I broke up with Sara. I didn’t have sex for a year before you came bursting into the loft, telling me that we were together now if I wanted to or not. I did want to by the way, just in case there was any doubt about that.”

Felicity released a huff of breath before she asked, “And secondly?”

“Secondly, in case I should feel so needy to have sex, I have seven and a half years of very wonderful memories of how sex with you feels like and I have two very healthy hands to help me release the tension.”

Oliver waited for Felicity’s answer with held breath. They hadn’t talked about masturbation often, mainly because of their fulfilled sex life. They had however masturbated together a few months ago as it had been one of the wishes on Felicity’s sex list, a list he was keeping safely to put to good use when time called for it. Anyway, he Oliver just hoped that his honesty right now wasn’t overwhelming her.

“I know that you are struggling,” he said eventually when Felicity stayed quiet. “When I came back from the island, I was struggling, too. Even when we got together three years later, I still had trouble because I never really worked through my issues until then. It took time, a lot of time really, and I know they will never just completely go away. I do however know that what helped me was that I knew I could always lean on you. Letting you hold me after nightmares or talking to you when I was feeling down was helping me and I hope that I can do the same for you and-“

When Oliver heard the key turning in the lock, he stopped. Holding his breath, he waited for Felicity to open the door. It only took a couple of seconds before the door opened a little. Felicity peaked out at him, her bottom lip caught between her front teeth. Just like he did, she was sitting on the floor, right next to the door.

“Hi,” she whispered.

“Hi,” Oliver whispered back, smiling. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” Felicity replied, releasing a short chuckle, “slightly embarrassed and ashamed after-“

“Don’t,” Oliver interrupted her gently, shaking his head. “You have no reason to be.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip again, leaning her head against the tiled wall. She looked at him, releasing a low sigh of relief. Oliver smiled and reached out his hand for her. It only took her the break of a second to put her hand in his and let Oliver pull her closer until she was sitting in his lap. Their lips met in a slow kiss immediately.

This, kissing Felicity like this, was what made him the most comfortable. He could feel in the way she kissed him back and the way her hands stroked through his hair gently that she wasn’t kissing him because she felt she needed to do so. She was kissing him because she wanted to kiss him and because she felt comfortable and content doing so and that was all he wanted and needed for them.

When Felicity broke the kiss abruptly, Oliver opened his eyes and frowned at the way Felicity was looking at him or rather right through him.

“Hey, what’s- what’s going on?” he asked.

Felicity didn’t answer. She pulled her hand from his shoulder and put it to her baby bump, moving it slightly until she seemed to have found the right position where her hand stayed. Oliver watched the movements closely before he looked back at Felicity’s face.

“Felicity?” he asked, nervously waiting for her to tell him what’s wrong.

Instead of answering Felicity took his hand and put it to her rounded belly where her own hand had rested only a couple of seconds ago.

“Can you feel it?” she asked.

“Feel what?” Oliver asked since he wasn’t feeling anything other than the warmth of her skin that came through her top.

“The baby is kicking,” Felicity replied, looking down at their hands for a moment before she looked back at him with a wide smile. “Our baby is kicking.”

“Our baby is kicking,” he repeated her words, feeling her smile infecting him. “Our baby is really kicking?”

Felicity nodded furiously, tears welling in her eyes. “The baby is kicking.”

Within the break of a second Oliver cupped Felicity’s face in his hands and kissed her, gently yet with all the wrought-up emotions he was feeling in his chest. He rolled them over, lying Felicity down on the floor and hovering above her as he kept kissing her. There was nothing sexual about the kiss despite the closeness in the moment. There was just them and their raw emotions.

This, kissing Felicity in the bliss of the moment of knowing that she could feel their baby kick for the first time, was the very reason why he wasn’t worried about them. No matter how hard this time was for her, for both of them actually, they could still work through their issues and be happy about the little moments of happiness they were given in the middle of this storm around them. As long as that wouldn’t change, Oliver doubted that he would have to be worried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! I need to warn you that it might be possible that you have to wait a while for the next chapters. I am not really feeling like myself right now, having trouble to enjoy anything and basically stressing myself out over worst case scenarios that might not even happen. Yep, I basically wrote about it in the last two chapters, even if on a completely different subject. Anyway, as long as I am not feeling like writing, I won’t post. I hope it won’t take too long, but I can’t promise anything. Since the last eps of Arrow will start being aired soon and we know it’s going to be lit and Olicity is finally rising again, I think you can endure a longer wait. 
> 
> xoxo Kathi


	216. Celebrating hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short message to begin with: I am not really back to writing. It’s still terribly hard to feel the same enjoyment about it as I used to before all this stress caught up with me and started affecting me more than it should. I am a little bit better, physically and emotionally, but I still don’t feel like my old self.
> 
> I am a slow writer right now, maybe writing 5 pages a week when I used to write like three chapters of around 10 pages each in a week, even more when I have time at the weekends. I do have three chapters finished, including this, and will post them very, very slowly. I can’t tell you when I post them since it depends on when I get to write something more. I hope it all won’t take to long. 
> 
> I have received a lot of encouraging messages since I started my break from the excessive writing. I am so grateful for all of you who reached out. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have gotten myself to even type a single sentence, nevermind post this chapter. I hope you won’t have to wait too long for the next chapters, but I fear you will have to be patient a little longer.
> 
> Thanks for all of you and enjoy the chapter. 
> 
> xoxo Kathi

“Daddy?”

“Yes?” Oliver asked, lightening the sixth candle on the menorah before he blew out the small flame at the end of the matchstick. He looked at Emmy, who was sitting cross-legged in one of the armchairs and chewing on her bottom lip. She had never looked more like Felicity than in this moment. “What’s wrong, Sweetie?”

“Why are we celebrating Chanukah without mommy?”

“We are celebrating it for her,” Oliver explained. “Mommy was tired and needed to lie down, so daddy celebrated Hanukkah for her these last couple of nights already. It’s weekend and your Christmas Holidays just started, so I thought you could all celebrate it with me for mommy.”

“Millie’s sleeping,” Tommy said, leaning over the backrest of his armchair to look into the small crib there where Millie was sleeping.

Oliver chuckled. “Millie’s still a baby. It’s too late for her to still be awake, but it’s nice when she’s here, too. Right?”

Tommy nodded and smiled at his baby sister once more before he sat down and grabbed some more sweets from the plate on the couch table. When he noticed his daddy’s eyes on him, he quickly let go of some of the jelly beans to not have his entire hand full with them, leaned back in the armchairs and started eating them. Oliver smiled. He wouldn’t have even said something about the many jelly beans Tommy had grabbed, but it was amusing to see his son react so quickly when he thought he was being told to eat less sweets.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, Sweetie?” he answered to Emmy once more.

“Why’s mommy not celebrating with us?” she asked.

Oliver took in a deep breath, giving his daughter a somewhat comforting smile. “Remember that mommy and I told the two of you that mommy is feeling a little tired and sick and that having a baby is really exhausting?”

Emmy nodded. “But she has been sick for so long now.”

“I know,” Oliver replied in a whisper, nodding his head slowly. “I know.”

“When is it getting better?” Emmy asked.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “We don’t know,” he replied honestly, “but I think mommy is feeling a little bit better already.”

“Really, daddy?” she asked sadly. “You’re not lying.

Oliver frowned. “Yes, really. Why would I lie to you?”

“Because first Aunt Laurel was here all the time and now Aunt Laurel isn’t coming anymore, but you are here all time. Is mommy so sick?”

Oliver gave his oldest daughter a sympathetic look. He wished Emmy was younger. Back when Felicity had been pregnant with Tommy, she had been too young to realize what was going on with her mommy. She realizes so much more now.

“Daddy is back home because I rather spend my time with you guys than in the company. Mommy did a great job there, so I can leave the people alone with their work and stay here instead. Mommy is getting better, though. I promise.”

“Really?” Emmy asked, a smile forming on her lips.

Oliver smiled back at her, nodding his head. “Yes, I think so.”

Though they had feared that maybe their luck with Felicity feeling better had been running out with the nightly heart to heart they had had about not having sex lately, after a couple hours of sleep everything had looked a little more hopeful again. It seemed like the sudden realization of how many time had passed without sex for them had just unsettled Felicity a little that night. It hadn’t pulled her further back down into the depression again.

Felicity was still tired often and got exhausted easily, even if it wasn’t as bad as it had been at the beginning. It was why Oliver had sat down in the living room and lightened the menorah for her every night of the last five days alone and now today with the kids. He knew that for them it wasn’t the same without Felicity hear. She always told stories and read Hebrew prayers. Oliver had considered going to the synagogue and ask for help, so he could pronounce the prayers correctly, but then he had decided to just use the translated texts. He knew it wasn’t the same, but he also felt reading Hebrew prayers wasn’t the same as when Felicity did it.

Because of that Oliver and the kids spent the night eating sweets and playing games. It was great spending time with them just like that and knowing that even though Felicity wasn’t there to spend this time with them, they were doing it for her. It was really all that mattered.

It wasn’t long until Tommy started yawning almost minutely. His eyes were already falling shut on their own accord.

Oliver smiled at his son, asking, “Do you want to go to bed?”

Tommy rubbed his hands over his eyes. “I want to sleep in mommy’s bed.”

“Okay, come here,” he said, getting up and lifting Tommy into his arms. “We go upstairs to brush your teeth and then you can sleep in mommy’s bed.”

“I wait here and take care of Millie,” Emmy said.

Oliver smiled back over his shoulder at her. “Thanks, Sweetie.”

Oliver had trouble keeping Tommy awake long enough to get him into his pajamas and brush the little boy’s teeth. He was almost staggering a little when he went to his parents’ bedroom. Oliver opened the door for him and immediately Tommy went through the room and crawled onto the bed. He snuck under Felicity’s blanket and even in her sleep she just reached out her arms for him and pulled him close until he was wrapped into her arms safely.

Smiling, Oliver watched the two for a long moment. Watching his family never failed to make him feel at home. After a moment, he closed the door and went back upstairs, though. He released a quiet chuckle when he saw that Emmy had crawled into Millie’s crib and was sleeping snuggled up to her baby sister.

He carried Millie upstairs, lying the nine months old baby down in her crib in the nursery and switching on her crib mobile, so there was low music playing there. Then he went back downstairs to get Emmy and carried her into her room, lying her down in her bed under the blanket. Good thing, she had already gotten into her pajamas before they had started with their Chanukah tradition.

Once Oliver closed the door to Emmy’s room behind him, he shot a glance at his watch. It was almost eleven, so he could actually go to bed, too. He knew he would most likely not fall asleep anytime soon anyway. In the past nights, he had barely caught five full hours of sleep, lying awake for hours before falling asleep. He didn’t know why that was, but he knew that he’d rather get some more energy off his body before going to bed.

Maybe that way he would just pass out from exhaustion.

 

 

When Felicity felt goosebumps spreading on her arms, she carefully pulled Tommy a little closer to her and pulled the blanket over her shoulders, making sure it wouldn’t cover her little boy’s head, though. She still felt terribly cold, so she tried to curl up as much as possible to get warmer. With Tommy sleeping in her arms and pressing the full length of his body against hers, that was much easier said than done, though.

Felicity loosened one arm from around Tommy and reached it out behind her to try finding Oliver’s hand and get him to roll over, so he could snuggle up against her back and she could benefit from the warmth of his body. When Felicity couldn’t find him, she turned her head over her shoulder as far as she could, almost ricking her neck in the process. She frowned at the sight of the empty half of the bed and shot a look at the clock on her nightstand.

It was almost three, so Oliver should have been in bed for hours now. She knew he had lightened the menorah these past nights like it had been their tradition for years now. They almost celebrated Christmas and Chanukah together with their family. He had always come to bed around elven-thirty, though. Maybe he had fallen asleep on the couch which would mean he would wake up with an aching back tomorrow and she would have to shiver all night. Carefully detangling herself from Tommy, she crawled out of the bed, grabbed Oliver’s grey hoodie on her way out and strolled down upstairs.

She had just reached the foot of the stairs when she heard the steady pants coming from the living room. Tugging the sleeves of Oliver’s hoodies over her hands and wrapping her arms around her waist, Felicity tiptoed over to the living room. Leaning into the doorframe, Felicity watched Oliver doing handstand pushups. His body was covered in sweat, his arms shaking slightly from exhaustion. He didn’t stop, though. Instead he only pushed himself to keep going.

“What are you doing?” Felicity asked.

Oliver got down on his feet and turned around to her quickly. He moved a hand over his face, wiping away the sweat that kept on running over his skin. Then he scratched the back of his head, put on a barely convincing smile and cleared his throat.

“Hey,” he said, shooting a gaze to where he had just been doing his version of pushups. “I was just, uhm- I was just on my way to bed and-“

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered, “what are you doing?”

He lowered his gaze, shuffling his foot. “I couldn’t sleep and wanted to get rid of some energy.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She knew that Oliver suffered from sleep deprivation every once in a while. It was especially bad during times that triggered old memories that Oliver tried to bury deep inside of him like storms that reminded him of the night the Gambit had gone down or the anniversary of his mother’s or Tommy’s death. When she wasn’t feeling okay, it was another thing that was keeping him from sleep.

“We could watch a movie or something,” Felicity suggested.

“You don’t have to,” Oliver said, shaking his head. “Just go back to bed and-“

“Would you like to watch a movie with me?” Felicity interrupted him, leaning her head against the doorframe and looking at Oliver. “I could make us some warm milk and then we could cuddle on the couch because it will help you calming down while sleeping will only increase your sleeping problems.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, moving a hand through his short hair, before he released the breath with a low sigh. “Are you sure?”

“Very sure,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “Besides, your child is doing somersaults in my belly, so I doubt I will be able to get back to sleep any time soon anyway.”

“ _My_ child, hm?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows.

Felicity grinned teasingly and approached Oliver slowly until she was standing right in front of him. While Oliver put his hands to her hips, Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck and straightened up onto the tip of her toes.

“You know they are always your children when they are misbehaving,” Felicity replied. She bumped her nose against his gently before she gave him a lingering kiss. When she pulled away, she took some sniffling breaths in before she explained, “You don’t come onto the couch as long as you smell like that.”

Oliver gasped for breath. “Are you saying I am stinking?”

“That would still be a nice way to put it,” Felicity replied.

“There is an easy solution to that,” Oliver replied.

“You go under the shower?”

“No,” Oliver answered, a wide grin spreading on his face. “I will make sure that you stink too.”

That being said, Oliver cupped her face in his hands and started rubbing his face against hers to wipe his sweat onto it. Felicity laughed, trying to get away from him, but Oliver’s hold was too strong. He just kept rubbing his face against hers, making Felicity laugh. When Felicity eventually gave up the fight, Oliver just rubbed his face against hers for a moment longer. Then he pecked the tip of her nose and smiled at her contently.

“Now you stink, too,” he said with an amused smile.

Felicity grumbled for a moment before she said, “You will still have to shower.”

“Damn it,” Oliver whispered with a happy chuckle that Felicity joined into.

While Oliver headed to the shower Felicity went into the kitchen. She prepared some hot milk while she was simultaneously looking into her app what the TV program offered in the middle of the night. Apart from several erotic movies this time of the night seemed to be the perfect time for everyone who wanted to binge watch some episodes of older TV shows. With the two mugs of hot milk in her hands and a chocolate bar under her arm, she went back into the living room right when Oliver came back downstairs.

“You have the choice between an old episode of _Private Practice_ , _Emergency Room_ and _Cold Case_ ,” Felicity told him. “I already ruled out all the erotic movies, so you have full reign between these three options.”

Oliver slumped onto the couch next to her, releasing a long breath. “Well, without the erotic movies there really is nothing worth watching on the table.”

Felicity boxed his side playfully before she lay down in his arms, her head resting against his shoulder. She immediately felt warmer and it was only getting better when Oliver pulled the blanket over them and wrapped his arms around her body.

“I am leaning towards Cold Case,” Oliver explained.

“Excellent choice, Mr. Queen,” Felicity replied with a smile back over her shoulder.

She grabbed the remote and switched on the TV. When the right channel was on and the episode started, she made herself even more comfortable in Oliver’s arms and he turned around onto his back, so she was even comfier. When his hands came to rest on her baby belly, Felicity sighed contently, moving her foot against Oliver’s.

When it was made known that the detectives would investigate the death of a six-month-old, Oliver kissed the top of her head and stroked his hand over her belly. “Shall we change the channel?”

“No, it’s okay,” Felicity replied. She laced her fingers through his on the belly and turned her head to kiss his shoulder through his shirt. “Three of our kids are safely sleeping upstairs, one is at his mother’s place, probably sleeping too, and this little nugget here is kicking me very firmly to make me know he or she is okay, too.”

“Good,” Oliver replied and she could feel him smiling against hair head.

As the episode progressed, Oliver and Felicity continued on making light comments about the plot. Both parents had seemed to be overly exhausted with the challenge of having a young boy and a baby while they were also trying to get forward in their careers. Especially the mom had seemed to have struggled. There was a fanatic nanny who was suspected of having drowned the baby when she had tried to christen the child against the baby’s parents’ will. The younger brother, a grown man in the present time of the episode, acted weirdly around his own baby.

Felicity had trouble focusing on what was happening. The warmth of Oliver’s body threatened to lull her back into sleep. She pinched herself from time to time, making sure that she’d stay awake. She didn’t want Oliver to sneak out from under her and go back to train himself until he was so exhausted that he’d pass out. When they had first gotten together, he had often stolen himself out of bed to train in the middle of the night, especially after days without any Arrow work that had just left him with too much energy. She had dragged him back every time, trapping him under her body, so he wasn’t able to leave. It had taken a while until he had grown so safe around her that he had actually been able to fall asleep more easily.

She wondered if he had done that for longer and she had just been too deep in her own misery to realize it or if it had only started now. She knew that Oliver would usually tell her if he couldn’t sleep, sometimes even just wake her up in the middle of the night so they could talk or… not talk. With the depression, he seemed to think it was better to find a way to deal with that on his own. Felicity understood that, but she was feeling better, so she was ready to make sure Oliver would get the rest he needed, even if she had to spend every night watching TV with him from now on.

Felicity pushed the thought aside for tonight and rubbed her hands over Oliver’s bicep and forearm. She felt Oliver’s lips pressing to the back of her head in response.

She focused back on the TV where the detectives were talking to the now adult son. He was suspected of accidentally killing his baby sister and Felicity felt Oliver’s arm wrap around her a little more tightly. Felicity felt sorry for the boy because growing up with such a burden must have been terrible. Sometimes little kids just didn’t know what they were doing and what pain they could cause when they weren’t being careful. If she only thought about something like this happening to her kids, Felicity felt a cold shiver running down her back.

The problem seemed to be that the crib mobile hadn’t been reachable for the boy, but it had been switched on when the parents had found the baby, so someone else must have been responsible for the child’s death. The boy in the show remembered that his mom had been there, so she was questioned again.

“ _You know, as a cop, I’ve seen things_ ,” the detective said with soft voice.

“ _Please, stop_ ,” the mom begged, shaking her head furiously.

“ _You saw them too, didn’t you?_ ” the detective went on. “ _Those terrible things_.”

“ _I don’t know what you mean_.”

“ _Locking the windows, the doors. You tried to shut out the danger._ ”

The mother sucked in a deep breath and almost whispered, “ _I was prone because Iris was premature._ ”

“ _You imagined all the things that could happen to Iris so often, you started to believe you wanted them to happen. That’s the sickness_.”

Felicity felt her body tensing. She felt the need to reach out her hand for the remote and turn off that show, but she felt her body was completely frozen. She was barely breathing, the air stuck in her throat. She knew whatever the end of the episode would bring, it wasn’t going to be something she would like.

“ _No!_ ” the mother almost screamed in pain, still shaking her head vehemently.

“ _That’s the sickness_ ,” the detective whispered nonetheless. “ _It’s postpartum psychosis._ ”

Felicity felt her chest growing tight and her heart rumbled in her chest almost painfully.

“ _No._ ”

“ _It must be unbearable, the fear of yourself especially_.”

The fear of yourself, the fear of what you did or didn’t do like when you forgot your baby in the back of the car because your head was full with other stuff – Felicity knew a lot about that. She knew how you beat yourself up after something like this happening, feeling eternally guilty and like you were the worst parent on the plant. You just got lucky that your child didn’t die. You didn’t protect it. It was actually your fault. You would have almost killed her.

She knew those thoughts, knew them a lot.

“ _I don’t know what happened to Iris._ ”

“ _You have spent the last twenty-four years trying to forget, but you know. The snow. It snowed that night, remember?_ ”

“ _I thought it was a sign. The snow._ ”

“ _A sign of what?_ ”

“ _It snowed the night that she was born. And I thought she’d go back to where she came from. A better place than with me_.”

Finally Oliver seemed to snap out of his own state of being completely frozen into place. She had felt his body tensing in time with hers, his arms tightening around her like he could protect her from all of this. Now he reached over and quickly switched off the TV. He was almost panting a little when he let the remote drop to the floor and wrapped his arms back around her. His lips pressed to the crown of her head.

For a long moment, neither of them said anything.

Felicity tried to process the case of the episode. There had basically been the picture-perfect family. They had been exhausted but happy. Like what parents with a baby weren’t exhausted from time to time? Only that of course it had been much worse than either of them had let on. She had suffered from depression and nobody had been able or willing to see it. Then she had killed her own child under the delusion that the little girl was better being off somewhere else, somewhere where she wasn’t, and her older child had grown up, thinking he had killed his little sister.

Felicity didn’t know if depression had been much of a thing back at the beginning of the eighties, but whether or not it had been, she knew how it felt to be caught up in the belief that having a baby was supposed to make you happy and feeling guilty when it only felt you miserable. When she had been pregnant with Tommy, she had tried to avoid her feelings because she had felt like she had been supposed to be happy and not feel miserable. She was having a baby, a very much wanted baby, so she had no right to feel miserable. Oliver on the other hand had at least at the start just believed that it was just the pregnancy messing with her mood, a misbelief a lot of people seemed to have. It had only made her madder at that time even if looking back she knew that it had been the most obvious assumption. Hormones even had a part in prenatal and postnatal depression, but they weren’t the only thing causing the harm.

Felicity herself was lucky. She had a husband who knew her so very well and was so very understanding that he always left her the room she needed and he hadn’t pushed her even back then when he hadn’t been knowing what had been going on. He had taken her feelings serious and supported her when she had told him that she thought that maybe she had a depression. He was respecting that she couldn’t be the person she usually was right now. She doubted that everyone was so lucky and she didn’t want to think about how much worse her depression would be if she hadn’t had all this support in him and their family and friends.

Felicity turned around, so she was facing Oliver. His eyes were on her immediately, his hands stroking up and down her back along her spine. She could see the shock in Oliver’s eyes since he hadn’t thought this would happen, either. It just wasn’t a light subject for either of them.

“You okay?” Oliver asked with breathy voice.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.”

“You know this is not going to happen to us,” he whispered, “right?”

“Well, I am hopeful that it won’t,” Felicity replied. “I know that you can never know, but I need to be hopeful and I am hopeful. I mean… it’s Chanukah. We are basically celebrating hope. If today isn’t the day to be hopeful, then when it is?”

Oliver smiled and nodded. “Being hopeful really is all we can do.”

Felicity smiled, rubbing her hands up and down Oliver’s chest. “I am really happy and grateful to have you in my life, you know that?”

“Of course I do,” Oliver replied. “And I hope you know that I am really happy and grateful to have you in my life, too.”

“Of course,” Felicity whispered.

She moved her fingertips through Oliver’s short, scratchy stubble, smiling at him contently. They had found each other and she was sure there weren’t many people who were that lucky to be able to say that they had found the one person who was always seeing the best of them and always encouraging them, no matter how hard the times. She gave Oliver a gentle, lingering kiss.

“Let’s go to bed,” Oliver suggested when their lips parted.

Felicity nodded, “Yes.”

They went upstairs hand in hand. Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s shoulder halfway up the stairs and yawned. Oliver picked her up into his arms like she weighed nothing and Felicity let him. Her legs were actually hurting from tiredness anyway and being carried by Oliver always felt good.

When they opened the door to their bedroom, Oliver stopped, cocking his head. Felicity followed his gaze to the bed, suppressing a smile when she saw Emmy and Tommy lying across the mattress like it was their bed.

“I could swear there was only one child lying in there when I left,” Felicity whispered.

“We are lucky Millie can’t walk yet.”

Felicity chuckled, turning her gaze to Oliver. “Just picture in one year when they would all get in here because Emmy would certainly get her youngest baby sibling out of the crib and carry him or her here, too. Our bed would be taken by our little army of kids.”

“Well, we should buy Emmy a larger bed then, so we can sleep there when the kids are occupying our bed.”

“Or we just buy an even larger bed for us, so we can go back to having family sleep overs.”

“What do you mean ‘going back’?” Oliver asked. “Have you seen our bed? We are still having those.”

“Well, Millie and William aren’t here, so…”

“I doubt William would be willing to join in on that,” Oliver whispered.

“What? A teenager who doesn’t want to sleep in his parents’ bed? Shocking,” Felicity whispered with mocking voice. “Well, only four children left to get out of the bed in the future then.”

Oliver smiled. “I gotta call the construction leader for the renovations because apparently, we need a larger bedroom to fit a bed where we can all sleep in.”

Felicity chuckled, muffling the sounds by kissing Oliver gently. She realized how for the first time in a long time she was much more excited than tired for what was about to come. It was a good feeling, a feeling she wanted to hold onto. Hope.


	217. Celebrating love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys!  
> 
> 
> Are we even still alive after 520?!
> 
> Anyway, I am still not back and it might get worse once more before it hopefully gets better, but I am trying to get back into a better writing mood. If you have time and are in for some fun and maybe want to help me a little, [**check out this little quiz/survey**](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSd7iYf20bcVMO4Sa5M4kSFehWIaGdp75ESMZ3_D7uXR-N_pVw/viewform) about the future of the _Time for a story_ children. It’s also like a dry run to test if maybe I will start letting reader vote about a few things in the much more recent future of the story.
> 
> I will probably let you know a few things about the results and the correct answers next weekend. ;)
> 
> Now enjoy the chapter!
> 
> xoxo Kathi

“Oh, Millie, be careful with the baubles,” William said, kneeling next to his baby sister. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back from the tree until her tiny hands fell away from the bauble she had been playing with. “We don’t want this to break and for you to hurt yourself.”

Millie turned around to William, releasing a squealing sound while she was smiling at her older brother. Then she turned back around to the tree and pointed at the bauble again, reaching for it. When she tried to crawl forward, William held her back again and whispered something into her ear.

Oliver went down on his knees next to his youngest and oldest child, explaining, “Don’t worry. The baubles down here are shatterproof. We’ve learned since Tommy tried to climb the tree during his second Christmas.”

William chuckled. “I don’t even remember that.”

“Tommy was at the age of loving to climb everything, so he tried climbing the tree. If Felicity hadn’t noticed soon enough, he would have probably brought that tree to fall and bury him,” Oliver explained, shaking his head.

Tommy had always been a handful. All the children had been like that every once in a while, some more and some less. Millie was the definitely far behind on causing trouble. Since she was only nine months old, Oliver assumed that she still had all the time in the world to catch up on her older siblings.

Oliver watched William tapping the tip of his finger against one of the baubles, so it started swinging. Millie squealed happily and crawled towards it. This time William let her play with it, even encouraging her as long as she was being careful and didn’t make the tree drop down on them. Oliver smiled contently. He always loved watching his family and it never failed to amaze him how great William was with his little siblings despite coming into this family late and under not so ideal circumstances.

“You know,” Oliver said after a while, “I was wondering if maybe there was something we could do together when you come to live with us for a few weeks in January.”

William nodded. “Sure. We could all go to the zoo together or-“

“No, I mean just us,” Oliver interrupted him quickly. When William perked up his eyebrows, Oliver added, “I know that you often have to kind of stand back to your siblings since they are so much younger and we kind of need to do childproof activities when we do something together. I figured maybe we could do something you’d enjoy more than going to the zoo when it was just us.”

“I like spending time with Emmy, Tommy and Millie. I always wanted siblings and now I have them and it’s cool being the big brother who can do so much more.”

“They are really looking up to you,” Oliver said.

William smiled, not saying anything for a long moment before he explained, “If there was one thing I could wish for, though, it would be trying a climbing wall. We did that in school last year and it was a lot of fun, so…”

“Sounds great,” Oliver replied. “Anything else?”

William shook his head. “No, the climbing wall is it really. It would be cool if we could all do something together as a family, though. I mean if Felicity is feeling like it.”

Oliver followed his son’s gaze to where Felicity was standing and talking to John. She looked much better than in the last couple of weeks or even months. There was more color in her face, her eyes weren’t as dull as they always had been lately and she just looked better in general. Oliver could see how comfortable she was in the comfy cashmere dress that hugged her forms almost like a second skin.

“I think it’s getting better,” Oliver explained, looking back at William. “She’s slowly recovering.”

“And you think this time it will stay like that?” William asked.

Oliver sighed. He had told William that Felicity’s mental state had been an up and down in the last past months. Whenever it had looked like she was getting better, it had become worse again. There had been many more down-phases than up-phases. Oliver shot another look at Felicity, who was laughing about something John had just said, letting her head drop back and her curls jump up and down. He felt his heart warming in his chest.

“Yeah,” he whispered then. “Yeah, I really think it is finally getting better. It’s a slow process and there is still a long way ahead of her or ahead of us, but step by step…”

“Sounds good,” William said.

“It is good,” Oliver replied with a wide smile and turned back around to his son. “Do you-“

“Daddy?”

Oliver turned around, reaching out an arm for Tommy, who was approaching him. The boy stepped into his dad’s embrace and let Oliver kiss his cheek.

“What’s up, Buddy?”

“When do we open presents?”

Oliver smiled. “You want to open the rest of your presents?”

Tommy nodded. “Yes.”

“Then go get Sara and Emmy. Then we start.”

“Yes!” Tommy said excitedly and looked at William. “You help me find them?”

“Of course,” William replied.

“Well, looks like your older brothers are leaving us alone, Millie,” Oliver said.

He pulled Millie against him, peppering her face with kisses, and she squealed happily. When he turned his head back over his shoulder to look after Tommy and William, he found them hurrying out of the living room. Chuckling, he thought once more how much he loved Christmas. The kids’ excitement about it was probably the best part.

Oliver got up from the floor, lifting Millie against his chest. He was just about to take the little girl to where Laurel, Caitlin and Cisco were chatting when John put a hand to his shoulder.

“Hey,” Oliver said with a smile. “Everything alright?”

John smiled, shooting a look back over his shoulder to where Lyla and Felicity were talking from one pregnant woman to the other.

“It’s Christmas. Everyone is here and celebrating. My wife is expecting our second baby,” John replied. “There isn’t much to make it better.”

Oliver nodded. “Right.”

It was really nice how they always managed to find time to celebrate holidays or birthdays together. The times that they had only seen each other when villains had terrorized the city were long gone. Luckily, he should add.

When he looked back at John, intending on asking something more, he noticed his friend’s gaze and perked up an eyebrow.

“What?” Oliver asked.

“How did you sleep the past nights?”

“I- uhm-“ Oliver stuttered a little, taken aback by the sudden question. When he caught Felicity shooting a look in their direction, though, he sighed. “Did Felicity talk to you?”

“She did,” John confirmed, “and she asked me to tell you that she is fine and she would very much appreciate if you could spend the nights in bed with her instead of exercising in the living room. By the way, not having to tell you to spend the nights in the bed with you wife might be something that might have made my Christmas even better.”

Oliver pressed his lips together. He had spent some nights exercising excessively instead of trying to sleep, feeling like he needed to exhaust himself before he was even able to consider falling into bed and trying to fall asleep. Felicity had caught him training on the sixth night of Chanukah and distracted him. Since then, she had always made sure he was lying next to her before she fell asleep and Oliver had stayed in bed with her, knowing that it was what she wanted and needed.

“Felicity is getting better,” John explained quietly, “which means that you can take a little step back from worrying about her. I know you will always worry, but give yourself some rest, okay? Felicity’s a big girl and she will tell you if she’s getting worse. Trust her on that and allow yourself to relax a little.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “Yes, you are right.”

John gave him a look and clapped his shoulders as he walked past him. Oliver took in a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, he looked at Millie, who was smiling at him happily.

“Let’s go find mommy, okay?” he asked and kissed Millie’s cheek. Walking to the kitchen where he had seen Felicity go to, he asked his youngest, “Can you say ‘mama’?”

“Ba-ba,” Millie replied.

Oliver chuckled and kissed her temple. “Maybe that’s a little too soon.”

“What’s a little too soon?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

Oliver looked up to find Felicity standing at the kitchen island, pouring herself a glass of water. She smiled at him gently.

“I thought I could get her to say her first word,” Oliver explained, shrugging his shoulders, “but it’s too soon.”

“Well, Emmy said her first word early, Tommy rather late in comparison,” Felicity replied and came around the kitchen island to play with Millie’s foot. The little girl reached out her hands for her mother and Oliver handed her over. Immediately she grabbed a strand of her mother’s hair and started tugging. Felicity stroked her hand up and down Millie’s back. “You take your time and say your first word when you’re ready.”

“John talked to me,” Oliver said when Felicity looked back at him again. He didn’t need to specify it anymore, knowing Felicity would know what he meant anyway.

She smiled gently and put a hand to his chest right over his head, cocking her head. “I know you have trouble sleeping, but exhausting yourself like that is not going to help you.”

“I know,” Oliver replied with a sigh, putting his hand over hers.

“And I am getting better,” Felicity added, “so you can treat yourself with some rest.”

Oliver sighed. “I know.”

Felicity looked at him intently, wordlessly asking if he really knew and Oliver nodded. He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed the palm. Then he pulled at her hand to make Felicity and Millie move closer against him. He kissed the top of Felicity’s head and pushed his nose into her hair to breathe her in.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied. She tipped her head back a little and smiled at him. “And I promise you that I will tell you if it’s getting worse again.”

Oliver nodded, stroking the knuckles of his fingers over her cheek. “And I promise you to spend the nights in our bed again.”

“Good,” Felicity replied with a relieved smile and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to kiss Oliver’s lips softly.

When a few minutes later Tommy called for them to come, so they could open the presents, Oliver and Felicity joined the others in the living room, holding their hands. Felicity handed Millie over to Thea and sat down on the backrest of the couch. Oliver put his arms around her waist from behind, resting his fingers against her baby bump. He smiled when he felt their baby kicking against his palm lightly. It was barely able to be felt for everyone but Felicity, but Oliver had experience in making out the baby’s movements by now. Felicity leaned back against him, keeping her head against his shoulder.

They watched the kids - their kid as well as Baby Sara, who hadn’t been a baby in quite some time but would always stay their Baby Sara in a lot of ways – opening their presents and being delighted by them. Everyone helped Millie unpacking her presents, trying to make her as excited for the actual presents as for the colorful papers they had been wrapped in, but just like her older siblings before the youngest Queen had more fun with the wrapping papers.

Once all gifts were unwrapped and the kids started playing with the new toys, Roy and Laurel taking over their tasks as godparents and playing with Millie, everyone distributed over the room. Oliver and Felicity stayed where they were, though, John and Lyla joining them.

“I can’t believe there will be two more little nuggets who will open their presents next year,” Lyla said. “And I can’t believe I am calling them ‘nuggets’, but Donna infected me with it.”

“The family is growing and growing,” Oliver agreed, nodding his head.

“Yeah, well, ours is not continuing to grow after this one,” Felicity said, “because I am out on the baby-making-thing after this one.”

“I actually meant our big superhero-family,” Oliver whispered, so William wouldn’t hear. “Trust me, my need to become a dad is more than satisfied by now.”

Five kids were a lot, definitely more than he had ever thought they would have. He had always assumed that they would have two, maybe three children. Five, even if William had only entered the family late, were a lot. The Arrow-Family as Felicity liked to call the group of their actual family and friends had some more couples to extend the next generation.

“Do you-“

When they heard the low hum, Felicity stopped and looked at the ceiling. Oliver followed her gaze and chuckled at what he saw there. Tommy’s new toy helicopter was hovering over their heads, a mistletoe attached to it. Oliver shot a look to the kids. Tommy was directing the helicopter with the remote, Emmy and Sara sitting next to him and grinning at their parents.

“You have to kiss now!” Emmy called out for her parents.

“You, too,” Sara added for her parents.

Oliver chuckled, looking at Felicity. “Should we?”

“Well, it’s tradition, so…”

Felicity puckered her lips and Oliver lowered his head, kissing her softly. He moved his arms around her waist while his lips were moving against hers slowly. When their lips parted, his bumped his nose against hers playfully and Felicity chuckled.

“Hey, you are still standing under the mistletoe,” Emmy complained.

“Yes, but we can’t continue kissing each other all day,” Felicity replied.

“Why not?” Emmy asked.

“Yeah, why not, Felicity?” Oliver asked her, an amused grin playing on his lips.

Felicity shot him a short look, mockingly punishing him for not being on her side in this. She took a step back then, pulling at Oliver’s head to take him with her.

“Now we are not standing under the mistletoe anymore,” Felicity told Emmy.

Sara whispered something into Tommy’s ear and he let the helicopter follow his parents’ movements.

“Now you do again,” Sara told them.

“She’s right, Felicity,” Oliver agreed, nodding his head. He winked towards the three giggling kids before he added at Felicity, “Now we do again.”

Grinning, he puckered his lips and smiled when Felicity rolled her eyes in fake annoyance and straightened up on her toes to kiss his lips. Still kissing him, Felicity already urged him to take a few steps away. When Oliver opened his eyes, his lips still against Felicity’s, though, he saw the helicopter following them no matter where they went.

It continued like that for several minutes, the helicopter always following them, no matter where they went. Amused about the kids’ fun on this, Oliver and Felicity kissed again and again to make Tommy, Emmy and Sara happy. The whole thing went on for around ten minutes before Oliver cupped Felicity’s face, giving her a long and lingering kiss and ended the game.


	218. Teasing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still not back. Whenever there is some progress for the better, I feel pulled back a thousand miles the next moment. That being said, my real life still sucks and there is no end near. You will have to live through less updates for some time more. 
> 
> I am trying to help you through the wait with some headcanons and questions to discuss. By the way, thanks for all 137 of you who answered the survery about the Queen Kids’ futures. It made me very happy to see so many people are still invested. 
> 
> Also a big thanks to everyone who was reaching out to me and tried to encourage me. I think it proves that internet friends are real friends after all. 
> 
> xoxo Kathi
> 
> PS: This very short chapter is inspired by a prompt about this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7JLVushQV8&feature=youtu.be). Check it out for some fun.

When Felicity closed the door to Tommy’s room behind her, she released a long breath. She had thought he would never fall asleep. The times that he had taken naps were long over, so going back to it for New Year’s Eve had been a bit of a challenge. He was asleep now, though, and that was all that mattered.

She strolled towards her own bedroom, smiling at the sounds of her youngest daughter’s giggles coming from there. Oliver had been supposed to put her down for her nap while Felicity had taken care of Emmy and Tommy. It sounded like he hadn’t had much success, though.

Felicity stepped into the doorframe to their bedroom, and saw Oliver kneeling on the floor in front of the bed. Millie was sitting on the mattress, waving a small pillow around as she seemed to be trying to hit Oliver. He ducked away halfheartedly, letting her hit his face with the pillow more often than not. Millie stopped for a few seconds then, giggling in amusement, before she gave it another try. Smiling, Felicity rested her head against the doorframe and watched the two of them for a long moment.

Things had gotten a lot better lately. Felicity actually felt like she was back to her old self. Halfway through the pregnancy, she felt it had been about time to finally get better. It was like she almost couldn’t remember when she had felt this unburdened the last time.

She didn’t know how long she had been standing there when Millie pointed her little finger at her, smiling happily. Oliver turned his head over his shoulder, his smile matching their daughter’s at seeing Felicity. It didn’t fail to make her stomach tingle in the best way possible. It had been awhile since she had felt these butterflies.

“Did Emmy and Tommy finally fall asleep?” he asked.

“Emmy fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow,” Felicity explained with a smile. Emmy had spent all morning at Deepa’s and the girls had chased Deepa’s dog all through the house and garden it seemed. She had been really exhausted, unlike Tommy. “Our little boy was much more trouble.”

“Boys always are,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

“And yet you want this baby to be a boy,” Felicity stated, moving her hand over her baby bump where she could feel her unborn baby kick against her palm. “Aren’t you fully stretched as a stay-at-home dad of four yet that you want to add some extra trouble to it with the fifth child?”

“It’s not like I really have a preference for the baby’s sex.” Oliver smiled, getting up to sit down on the edge of the bed and pulling Millie onto his lap. He shrugged his shoulders. “I just figured the pattern would call for a boy.”

Felicity puckered her lips, hiding an amused grin. Oliver had stated that maybe they should wish for a boy, so their boy could grow up with John’s and Lyla’s baby boy and become best buddies. Felicity had teased that he only wanted their baby to be a boy, too, because he couldn’t stand the idea of having a boy right in the reach of his baby girl the entire time. As much as she as well as others liked to tease about that, Felicity knew that Oliver was just joking with it. At the end of the day, all he wanted was for their kids to be happy and if one of them would fall in love eventually, all he would do was making sure that they had found a good person to be with. Everything else wouldn’t matter.

“Why’s Millie not asleep yet?” Felicity asked finally, breaking the comfortable silence that had settled between them.

Oliver chuckled. “Well, that’s kind the story.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Tell me.”

“I wanted to cut her toenails,” Oliver explained and tickled the sole of Millie’s feet. She kicked her legs so wildly that she almost fell from Oliver’s thighs. He held the baby to him carefully, though. “But Millie kind of kept me from doing so.”

“You are keeping daddy from doing so?” Felicity asked Millie.

“Should we show mommy?” Oliver asked.

He bounced Millie up and down on his thighs a few times before he sat her back onto the mattress and went back to kneel on the floor in front of the bed. Smiling, Felicity stepped closer and kneeled next to Oliver. When he leaned back a little to grab the small nail scissors from the floor, he brushed his lips against her jaw and Felicity put a hand to his thigh, squeezing gently.

When Oliver turned back to Millie, he gently grabbed her right foot to make it hold still while he was bringing the scissors closer. Felicity watched Millie, who looked at the scissors intently. As soon as there were only mere inches between the metal and her skin, she released a loud shriek. Oliver pulled back with the scissors immediately and looked at Millie. The little girl burst out into giggles, looking almost a little mischievously.

Felicity chuckled. “Are you hoaxing daddy?”

Millie released an amused squeal and kicked her legs. Smiling, Felicity tickled the soles of her baby’s feet, making the girl squeal and giggle even more. Her upper body even dropped back onto the mattress. She just lay there and laughed happily for a long moment before she held out her hands. Oliver reached for her and Millie wrapped her little fingers around her daddy’s hands to let him pull her up into an upright position.

“You gotta let daddy cut your toenails, Millie,” Felicity told their little girl. “Mommy’s going to hold your hand in the meantime, okay?”

Felicity gave Oliver a short nod and he gave it another try. Just like before, he brought the scissors closer to Millie’s foot. Before he could start cutting her nails, the little girl released another shriek that turned into a giggle when Oliver and Felicity both looked at her. It was impossible not to join into it, so both Oliver and Felicity laughed, too. She dropped his shoulder and moved her hand over Millie’s head.

“I just can’t cut her toenails like that,” Oliver explained with a chuckle.

“She’s a little monkey,” Felicity replied and leaned forward to kiss Millie’s toes. The baby crawled towards her to the edge of the bed from where Felicity pulled her into her lap and kissed the crown of her head. When Millie yawned, Felicity smiled. “Yeah, you are tired. You need a nap, too.”

Millie snuggled herself closer to Felicity, getting comfortable like she wanted to fall asleep right here.

“Maybe when she’s asleep, I can cut her toenails after all,” Oliver said.

Felicity nodded, looking at him. “Makes sense. I will put her to her bed and-“

“Let’s just let her sleep here,” Oliver suggested.

“You want to nap?” Felicity asked, perking up her eyebrows.

“Well, we have to stay awake long,” Oliver replied, puckering his lips.

Felicity snorted. “We just need to get through till midnight. After that, we put the kids to bed and lie down, too.”

“Yeah, I want to nap nonetheless.”

“Daddy’s getting old,” Felicity whispered to Millie, looking at Oliver teasingly.

“I am not getting old,” Oliver objected, narrowing his eyes at her.

“You are turning forty in less than two and a half years.”

“Still not getting old,” Oliver whispered.

Felicity chuckled and kissed his lips gently. “Don’t worry. I already promised you to love you until your old and have grey hair and a wrinkled face. When you can’t do the salmon ladder anymore, that is when we have to have a serious conversation.”

Oliver smiled. “Then I guess spending more time in the lair to train the salmon ladder should be one of my New Year’s resolution.”

He put a hand to her cheek and gently swiped his thumb over her cheekbone. Smiling, Felicity snuggled her face into his touch. It was nice finally spending so much unburdened time with her family again. The new year seemed to be the perfect time to bring some much-needed recovery.

“Let’s nap together,” Felicity suggested.

Oliver nodded and kissed her gently before he whispered against her lips, “Sounds like a good idea.”


	219. New beginnings

“Okay, three out of four children are already dressed and ready to go. Tommy is still struggling with his suit, but William is taking care of it because as soon as Tommy saw his big brother is wearing a suit, he was suddenly all too excited about-“

When Oliver stepped into the bedroom and found Felicity lying on the mattress, staring at the ceiling, he stopped dead in his tracks. She still had the towel, his towel to be exact, wrapped around her chest to cover her naked body underneath. The towel that had been wrapped around her head when he had gone to help the kids getting ready was gone, though. Her blonde hair was styled in a beautiful updo. Only some strands of hair were falling around her face loosely, framing it with soft curls. She had also applied make-up, yet she was far from being ready to leave and they were due to leave in like two minutes.

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked worriedly.

“Yes. Yes, of course,” Felicity hurried to say, continuing to stare at the ceiling. It only lasted a moment longer before she frowned and corrected, “No. No, I am not okay.”

Frowning worriedly, Oliver sat down on the edge of the mattress next to her. He stroked a hand over her baby bump and Felicity rested her hand on top of his. Oliver just watched her, waiting for her to say anything. Felicity stayed silent, though, still staring at the ceiling like it was holding the answers to all of her questions.

“Maybe we should stay here and-“

“No,” Felicity replied immediately and quickly sat up. “No, it’s your sister’s wedding and we are her only real family and you are supposed to walk her down the aisle and- there are like a thousand different reasons why that isn’t possible, so I will just- I will just-“

Felicity had gotten up and out of bed to hurry towards the bathroom. Her steps soon became slower, though, until she came to stop right next to the dresser, holding on to the edge of it and squeezing her eyes shut. Her face was almost white and she lifted her free hand to put it in front of her eyes.

“Dizzy?” Oliver asked worriedly.

When Felicity nodded her head, Oliver walked over to her. He put his hands to her shoulders and gently walked her back to the bed until she was sitting down on the edge of the mattress. He put his cool hand into her neck and Felicity leaned her head forward, resting her forehead against his lower stomach and taking deep breaths. Oliver could only assume that she was breathing against a wave of nausea because at least her face looked like she was nauseated.

Oliver watched her, feeling his worry for her increasing. Felicity had been great the last days. Since the holidays, she had seemed to get better every day. She didn’t need naps anymore. She got up early in the morning to make Emmy’s breakfast before school. She was spending less time in bed and had actually paid Queen Incorporate a visit to prepare everything for William’s internship there and she had really enjoyed it. She had even mentioned planning on going through some paperwork next week and maybe spend a little time at QI when William was there for his internship starting next week. Oliver couldn’t remember when he had seen her that excited about anything the last time.

That Felicity was feeling worse again right now worried Oliver, especially since circulation problems like these hadn’t been a real problem during the entire pregnancy so far. Sometimes it seemed like every pregnancy brought new problems with it and it was always Felicity’s health that had to pay the price.

“Maybe we should go to the hospital?” Oliver suggested.

“We don’t have time for that now,” Felicity replied, shaking her head.

“We will have to take the time for that,” Oliver replied firmly. “Felicity, this is important.”

Felicity took in a deep breath and looked at Oliver. He stroked his fingertips against her cheek before he rested his hand against the side of her face and Felicity snuggled into his touch.

“It’s just a little dizziness. It will pass,” Felicity explained.

Oliver frowned. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Felicity nodded. “Yes, I am sure.”

She kissed his palm before she took in another breath and got up from the bed again. When she swayed a little, Oliver held onto her hips and gently made her sit back down. Smiling gently, he got down on his knees next to her and held her hands.

“I think it’s better if you stay here for now,” Oliver told her. “You can still come when you are feeling better, but as long as you are like this, you are not doing yourself or anyone a favor at the wedding.”

“But it’s Thea’s wedding day,” Felicity said. “I am her maid of honor.”

“She will find someone else,” Oliver replied with quiet voice and squeezed her hands. “Thea knows that you have to take care of yourself and her little niece. I am sure she agrees that your wellbeing has to be our priority right now.”

“But-“

“Okay, see it from the other side,” Oliver suggested. “This day is all about Thea and if you walk down the aisle and collapse, everyone will take care of you and you will have all the attention. I don’t think Thea would appreciate it.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment longer, considering the seriousness of his answer, before she sighed and nodded her head.

“Tell Thea had I am sorry and that she should enjoy this day and that marriage is a lot of work, but it is also the best thing in the world and- You know what, just tell her that I am sorry and to enjoy the day. I will call her after the ceremony and tell her everything else I wanted to tell her,” Felicity explained.

Oliver nodded and kissed her forehead. “I will tell her. And you call me when there is anything going on, okay? When you are feeling worse or-“

“I promise,” Felicity replied.

She squeezed his hands shortly before she scooted back on the mattress and lay down on the bed, closing her eyes with a sigh. Oliver watched her for a few seconds before he headed to the bathroom and put on his smoking to get ready for the wedding. He hated that Felicity wasn’t going to be there with him, but he knew it was only for the better. They had expected for things to possibly get worse again, but they knew they were strong enough to get through that. They just had to be patient and wait for the storm to go away once and for all, hopefully sooner rather than later.

When he was all dressed up, Oliver went back into the bedroom. He sat down on the mattress next to where Felicity was lying. Her hair was back down, falling onto her shoulders in soft curls. Smiling, Oliver stroking his fingers through her hair and Felicity opened her eyes to smile at him.

“Hey,” she said, giving his look a scrutinizing look. “You look handsome.”

“I always do,” Oliver replied with a smug smile and chuckled when Felicity just rolled her eyes at that. He kissed her forehead before he asked, “Is there anything I can get you, anything you need before I leave?”

Felicity shook her head. “Just promise me you will enjoy the day and won’t sneak outside to be alone all of the time.”

Oliver smiled, quietly thinking that she just knew him too well. The thought of just seeking alone-time, so he didn’t have to tell everyone why Felicity wasn’t with him, had been on his thoughts. When Felicity asked him not to draw back like that, though, he couldn’t do anything else but promise her not to.

“I promise,” Oliver replied with a smile. “Take your rest. I’ll save you some of the cake and bring it home for you.”

“You are just the best husband.”

“Not going to disagree on that,” Oliver said with a chuckle. He pecker her lips shortly. “I’ll send you photos. See you later.”

“See you later.”

Oliver felt his heart growing heavier in his chest at the thought of leaving Felicity alone, but he knew it was the right choice to make at the end. This was Thea’s big day and as the one blood-family she had left – not counting Malcolm since nobody knew where he was anyway and he certainly didn’t count as real family – he had to be there for her.

“Where’s Felicity?” William asked when Oliver got downstairs where the kids were already putting on their jackets.

“Felicity’s not coming,” Oliver explained. “She isn’t feeling good today.”

“Oh,” William said, frowning slightly.

“Why’s mommy not feeling good?” Emmy asked.

Oliver sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “Sometimes people aren’t just feeling good, Sweetie.”

Emmy lowered her gaze. “Is she going to be as sad again as the last time?”

Stroking his hand about his daughter’s head, he sighed quietly. “I hope she won’t. But you know what will help mommy?”

“What?”

“If we are all going to have a great day today,” Oliver told her, “because that is what I promised mommy we would do. Can we do that?”

Emmy nodded firmly. “Yes, we can.”

Oliver smiled. “Then let’s go.”

 

 “Come in, Ollie!” his sister’s voice came from the inside of the room.

Oliver sucked in a deep breath before he opened the door and stepped inside of the room. He felt his heart skip a beat and swelling in his chest at the side in front of him. Thea was wearing a tight-fitting white lace dress with a long train. Her short hair was put into soft curly that framed her face. A long veil was attached to a glittery headband.

“You look beautiful,” Oliver said, feeling out of breath by the sight.

Thea smiled happily, tears springing to her eyes. “Thanks, Ollie.”

Oliver stepped closer to his sister and hugged her tightly. Thea rested her head against his shoulder and rubbed her hands up and down his back. He remembered that they had shared a hug just like this the day he had gotten married to Felicity, too.

“Mom and dad would be so proud of you,” he whispered into her ear then, knowing that she needed to hear it like he had needed to hear it on his wedding day. “They would be so unbelievably proud of the woman you have become and so happy for the life that’s ahead of you because I can tell you it’s going to be a good one.”

Thea pulled out of the hug, giving him a teary smile. “I wish they could be here.”

“They are in our hearts and that is all that matters,” Oliver replied.

“God, you are going to make me cry,” Thea complained halfheartedly and slapped his chest. She wiped her fingers back and forth under her eyes and took in a deep breath to look over his shoulder and frowned. “Where’s Felicity?”

Oliver gave her a tight smile. “She’s not coming. Sorry.”

“Oh,” Thea made, frowning worriedly. “Is she feeling worse again?”

“I am not sure,” Oliver admitted with a sigh and shrugged his shoulders, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants. “She felt dizzy, so I felt it was better for her to lie in bed and relax. I hope you understand.”

“Of course I do,” Thea replied. She put a hand to his shoulder and squeezed gently. “How are you feeling?”

Oliver took in a deep breath, pushing away the heavy feeling in his chest. He felt tears springing to his eyes, but quickly pulled himself together. He knew the smile he gave his sister wasn’t fully convincing, but he hoped it was enough to hide the depth of his worries.

“What I feel doesn’t matter, not today,” Oliver explained. “Today is just for you and Roy. Felicity asked me to tell you that she hopes you will have the best of days and that you should enjoy every second of it.”

“I will,” Thea promised, taking in a deep breath.

Oliver smiled. “Nervous?”

“A little,” Thea admittedly, “but mostly excited.”

“You are making the right decision,” Oliver told her. “Roy is a good guy.”

Thea smiled. “Yes, I know. Can you do me a favor?”

“Everything you want.”

“Can you check on him for me?”

Oliver chuckled. “Are you worried he is going to run away?”

“I hope not.”

“Don’t worry, I’d hunt him down and bring him back in time,” Oliver replied and winked at her. “Anything more I can do for you right now?”

“You could get me Laurel,” Thea replied. “She needs to step up as my maid of honor now.”

“Alright.” Oliver gave her a short nod of his head. “Making sure your future-husband is going to make it to the altar and getting you a new maid of honor, consider it done.”

Oliver smiled at Thea once more and she took in a deep breath, her face brightening with an even wider smile. Unable not do so, Oliver pulled her back into his arms once more, hugging her tightly.

“I am so, so proud of you,” Oliver whispered. He suddenly remembered all the times he would never see his sister again since the Gambit and tightened his arms around her once more. “I am so unbelievably proud of you and I am so happy that I get to share this day with you.”

“Yeah,” Thea whispered back. “I am so happy you are here, too.”

 

Oliver leaned against one of the pillars, watching Thea and Roy swaying in time to the music for their wedding dance. Thea looked happy, smiling at Roy, who was smiling back at her. They were in their own little bubble as they were dancing and that was exactly the way it was supposed to be.

Thea had really planned an amazing day. The ceremony had been beautiful and the kids had been so proud with the tasks they had been able to take on. Emmy and Sara had been flower girls and Tommy had been carrying the rings. He had been a little jealous of the girls, though, so Oliver had had no choice but to pick up the rose petals after the ceremony, so Tommy had been able to throw the flowers again at the reception.

Oliver took a look around to look for the children. Tommy was with Caitlin and Iris, letting them feed him some cake. Millie was safe on Laurel’s arms and watching the wedding dance with her godmother. Emmy was meanwhile tugging at William’s hand, probably trying to get him to dance with her. William looked like he had trouble telling his little sister that they had to wait for the next song since she was too excited to listen. Oliver smiled at the sight.

He knew the kids had been enjoying the afternoon and so had he, at least mostly. He had chatted with their friends from Central City that had traveled to Starling to celebrate with them and he had met a few other people he hadn’t seen in a while. Thea’s guest list was much larger than his and Felicity’s list had been for both of their weddings. Thea’s wedding was almost like a festival with a lot of guests, but it was nice nonetheless.

The only person that was missed was Felicity Oliver thought to himself with a quiet sigh. He really missed her.

Frowning, he pulled his phone out of the pocket of his pants. After the ceremony, he had texted Felicity to ask how she was doing and she had texted him that she was a little better, but that she was still lying in bed. During the last three hours, they had occasionally texted each other. Felicity had kept him updated on how she was feeling and Oliver had sent her photos of the wedding. The last twenty minutes, she hadn’t texted him back, though, and Oliver was getting worried, at least a little bit.

He shot another look towards the dance floor before he stole himself away and out onto the terrace. He closed the doors behind him took a few steps away from the loud music inside. As he stepped towards the balustrade, he took in a deep breath, feeling his head clearing slightly from the freezing air outside. He had never thought his little sister would have a winter wedding, but then again a few years ago he hadn’t been able to picture his baby sister getting married anyway.

Oliver dialed Felicity’s phone number and called her, nervously waiting for her to pick up. He knew that she could take care of herself, but she had been dizzy and he needed to make sure that she hadn’t fainted when going downstairs to grab a glass of water or anything. His thumb rubbed against the other fingertips nervously as he was waiting for her to answer the phone.

“Hey,” Felicity’s voice finally answered and Oliver released a breath of relief.

“Hi,” he was quick to say. “How are you feeling?”

Felicity hummed for a moment. “Aren’t you supposed to be enjoying the wedding?”

“I can enjoy the wedding and worry about my pregnant wife nonetheless.”

“Not when you are standing alone outside in the cold air, looking over the lonely garden while your sister is inside, having her first dance with her husband,” Felicity replied lightly. She clicked her tongue chidingly. “That’s really not what I call enjoying a day.”

Oliver hesitated for a moment before he frowned and turned around. He took a look around, trying to find Felicity because he was sure that she had to be here, but he couldn’t see her.

“What? You think I don’t know exactly what you are doing even if I don’t see you?” Felicity asked mockingly. “You think our love isn’t great enough for us to have a connection like that?”

Oliver grinned. “I know that when I say that I do think we have a connection like this, you will laugh at me for being sappy. When I say I don’t think we have a connection like that, you will mock at me and say that I don’t believe in our love and ban me on the couch.”

“Aw, isn’t it nice how well you know me?” Felicity replied with a chuckle that infected Oliver immediately.

He took another look around, but still didn’t find her. He couldn’t see her at least, but he did feel her. He could feel it in the rising of his heckles and the prickling on his forearms that she was somewhere closer. He might not think that they always knew exactly what the other was doing even when they weren’t around the other. He did, however, think that they knew if the other was close.

Puckering his lips, he asked, “Come on, where are you? I know you are here.”

When Felicity stepped around the corner, Oliver hung up the phone and cocked his head. She was approaching him slowly and Oliver took the opportunity to take her in. She was wearing the maid of honor’s dress Thea had picked out for her. It was a pale pink dress with long sleeves and a softly flowing skirt that snuggled around her curves. Her hair falling down on her shoulders loosely.

“You are catching your death.” Oliver quickly slipped out of his jacket and met Felicity halfway, putting his jacket around her shoulders and wrapping his arms around her waist loosely. Then he kissed the tip of her nose. “It’s too cold without a jacket.”

Felicity snuggled into the jacket a little and leaned more against Oliver. He could feel the baby kick against his abs and moved a hand from her back over her hip to the baby bump to trace the baby’s kicks. Felicity put a hand over his heart and rubbed it up and down gently.

“Hey,” she said, smiling softly.

Oliver smiled back at her. “Hi.”

She straightened up onto the tip of her toes at the same time Oliver lowered his head. Their lips met in a gentle kiss. Oliver pulled her closer, embracing her in his arms to make sure she wasn’t cold. When their lips parted, Felicity dropping back on her heels with a low sigh, Oliver tightened his arms around her once more to make sure she wouldn’t pull away.

“How are you feeling?” he asked with a smile, scrutinizing her face intently. “You look much better.”

“I feel a lot better,” Felicity replied. “I-“

She stopped and closed her eyes for a moment. Chuckling, she shook her head and rested her forehead against his shoulder. When leaned her head back again to look at him, she was smiling amusedly.

“All I needed was some cool air after spending too much time with the steamy air after the shower and blow-drying my hair. And the banana I ate didn’t hurt either,” Felicity told him. She took in a deep breath and sighed, moving her hands up and down his chest. “I think I am so on edge with everything that happened whenever I was pregnant – prenatal depression, falling down the stairs, edema, prenatal depression again – that I am just… oversensitive. I mistake tiredness for falling back into depression, dizziness for something worse… I think I just need to get used to finally being better again.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, sighing lowly. When she cocked her head at him, giving him a halfhearted smile, Oliver leaned his cheek against hers to just hug her for a moment.

“You have been through a lot,” Oliver said quietly.

“We both of have been,” Felicity replied.

Oliver took in a deep breath and smiled at Felicity. He knew she was right. They had been through a lot, individually and together. If it hadn’t been for Felicity and the life she had made possible for him, he would have never gotten through all the things that had happened to him since he had gotten lost on the island. He didn’t know what he’d do without her or if anything ever happened to her.

Stroking a strand of her hair out of her face and behind her ear, Oliver smiled and whispered, “We are going to be fine.”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, we are.”

Oliver lowered his head and brushed his lips against Felicity’s gently. She responded to the kiss immediately, melting against him with a sigh that revealed how content she was. Oliver bit into her bottom lip gently before he pecked her lips a last time and then pulled away a little.

“So, Mrs. Queen, are you in for a dance?”

“You ask me to dance?” Felicity asked, perking up her eyebrows. “And I don’t even have to threaten you to do it or allure you with sex?”

Oliver grinned. “Don’t get used to it.”

“I wouldn’t dare to,” Felicity replied.

Oliver squeezed her hand and pulled her with him back into the reception room and right onto the dance floor, where everyone was dancing now. He wrapped his arms around Felicity, who rested her head on his heart, and together they swayed in time to the music. Oliver snuggled his cheek to the top of her head and closed his eyes.

They were really going to be okay again.


	220. Happy

Biting her tongue to avoid a sigh that would probably wake up Oliver, Felicity turned from her right side to the left. It didn’t even take a second before Oliver rolled onto his side, too. He snuggled up to her back, wrapping his arms around her body and pressing his face into the crook of her neck and shoulder. His stubble scratched her soft skin gently when he pressed a soft kiss to the side of her neck and Felicity laced her fingers through Oliver’s on her baby bump with a smile, melting more against the warmth of his body. Even when Oliver was asleep, he was very aware of her every move.

She glanced at the alarm on her nightstand. The little moonlight that came in through the window allowed her to see that it was only three in the morning.

“Great,” Felicity muttered under her breath.

It had been so quiet that it had barely been audible. Yet she felt Oliver shift behind her. His arms tightened around her and he snuggled impossibly close to her back. Felicity stroked her hand over his forearm, hoping he wouldn’t wake up.

“You okay?” he asked even though his voice was sleepy and it sounded like he was barely awake.

“Yeah,” Felicity whispered reassuringly and squeezed his hand. “Just go back to sleep.”

Oliver snuggled his face against her skin once more before he released a sleepy sigh, telling her that he was indeed already going back to sleep. His breathing even out, ghosting over her cleavage and leaving goosebumps on her skin. Felicity closed her eyes, synchronizing her breathing with Oliver’s to get herself to stop thinking and fall asleep, too. It only took two minutes until impatience took over and she opened her eyes again.

She didn’t know why she had so much trouble falling asleep today. After weeks of feeling tired and exhausted every single second of every single day, feeling restless like this felt almost unreal to her. She felt like she could go out for a run now, at least if she didn’t reject exercising from the depth of her heart. It was like all the energy she hadn’t had for the past months was suddenly hitting her.

Her fingers traced the thick vein on Oliver’s forearm lazily. If it wasn’t for this wonderful man, who always respected her feelings and always supported her, she wasn’t sure if she had made it through the past months. She knew she could always lean on Oliver. Even if she knew that leaning on him meant burdening him with her own problems and fears and let him take a little bit of the darkness inside of her, he could take it. She and Oliver were the strongest when they were trusting each other with their feelings, no matter how hard it was.

Felicity pressed her lips together. Part of her wanted to turn around in Oliver’s arms, kiss him and tell him how grateful she was that he was here with her. She knew that he had had an exhausting night in the Arrow Cave, though. Oliver needed his sleep and she still had the rest of their life to tell him all that was on her mind.

Snuggling more into Oliver’s embrace, Felicity closed her eyes. She should catch some sleep before the kids would wake up, too. She had promised Emmy to take her to kindergarten tomorrow. She and Oliver had baked muffins that she wanted to bring for the other kids. Oliver had complained that he should be the one to take her to take her to school given that he had been the one to bake the muffins with her, but one kiss of Emmy and he had let it go. Oliver was easy to corrupt when it came to the children.

Felicity just felt sleep pulling at her when there were some quiet noises coming from the baby monitor on her nightstand. She opened her eyes to see Millie sitting up and moving he hands out to find her pacifier or maybe her stuffed elephant on the mattress. She was very patient with it like she wanted to do it all by herself. Felicity was sure that Emmy and Tommy in that age had already started crying to get their parents to help them.

Since Millie, even after she had pushed the pacifier between her lips, seemed unwilling to just lie down and go back to sleep, Felicity kept watching her. She took her purple elephant and pulled it into her lap, keeping it close. Then she seemed to be taken a look around the dark room and sighed. Felicity smiled about her patience. It was lovely to watch.

When Millie released another sigh, probably bored all alone in the dark room, Felicity’s smiled widened. She squeezed Oliver’s hand on her baby belly slightly before she pushed it away, freeing herself from his grasp. As soon as she was scooting away from him, to the edge of the bed, his fingers tightened around hers, though, trying to keep her from leaving.

“I’ll be right back,” she whispered.

She lifted their joint fingers to his lips to kiss the palm of his hand. Letting go of his fingers, she scooted to the edge of the bed and got up. She grabbed one of Oliver’s grey hoodies and put it on while she left the room and closed the door behind her as quietly as possible. She tiptoed through the dark hallways to Millie’s nursery.

As soon as Felicity stepped into her baby’s room, the little girl turned her head, smiling at her mother happily. Felicity smiled back at her, switching some dimmed lightning. Millie waved with her purple elephant, releasing a squealing sound.

“Pssst,” Felicity hushed her with a smile and quickly walked over to switch off the sounds of the baby monitor, so her nightly visit here wouldn’t wake Oliver. Then she turned to Millie. “We wouldn’t want to wake daddy, right?”

Millie squealed and kicked her legs in excitement. Eventually, she reached out her hands for her mommy and Felicity lifted the baby into her arms gladly. She kissed her rosy cheek and strolled to the rocking chair in the middle of the room. She sat down with Millie in her lap, the baby’s body cradled to her mother’s chest.

Looking at her now, she realized how much Millie had grown. It was like one moment ago she had been only five months old and had just learned to hold her bottle on her own and now she was suddenly nine months old and crawling in her bed or around her room. Where had the last four months with her baby girl gone?

“Well, I know where it has gone,” Felicity whispered to herself.

She had missed the last four months because of the depression and everything it had done to her. She had missed so many of her baby’s moments, especially since what had happened when Emmy and Tommy had been sick and she had taken Millie to the grocery store with her and then forgotten her in the car after. Thanks to Oliver’s pep talk she hadn’t drowned herself in her pity and guilt for too long, but it hadn’t exactly taken away the heaviness of her feelings and the bitter taste it had left in her mouth.

She had struggled with the question of how to go on after that. She knew she would never hurt any of her children, just like she had never meant to hurt Millie in the first place. Yet there had been this part of her that had been very scared of something like that happening again, especially as long as the depression had made her feel like she had lost herself.

With Millie in her arms like this now it all seemed so much easier. She knew Millie had no memories of what had happened and because of that she couldn’t be angry with her. Once Millie was older, Felicity would tell her about this and try to explain why it had happened and she would hope that Millie would understand it. For now, as long as her baby was too young to understand any of this, there was just one thing to say to her.

“Mommy’s so sorry for everything, Millie,” Felicity whispered, adjusting her daughter’s position in her arms, so she could kiss the top of her head. “Mommy hasn’t been herself for a while, but I am getting back to feelings better now and that means that I can be a much better mommy again now.”

She hadn’t felt like she had been the best mother lately. Sure, she hadn’t been horrible because she had spent as much time with her kids as possible and she had given everything she had had to give. She didn’t doubt that she hadn’t been a bad mother. She just knew that she could do much better and-

“Hey.”

Felicity almost flinched at the sound. She turned her head and quickly looked towards the door where Oliver was leaning in the frame with his arms crossed in front of his arms. When he saw her face, his smile was quickly replaced by a worried frown. Only now Felicity realized that some tears had fallen from her eyes and she quickly wiped them away.

“Why are you up?” Felicity asked quickly.

“It was cold and lonely without you in bed. I felt left and heartbroken and figured I had to find you,” Oliver answered with dramatic voice, strolling over to her and crouching down in front of her. He chuckled then and put a hand to her knee, asking, “You?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I couldn’t sleep.”

Oliver smiled at her comfortingly for a moment before he asked, “Is it getting worse again?”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head quickly. “No, no, it’s not getting worse. It’s quite the opposite. I- I feel so much better. It’s like- It’s like everything that happened in the last four months is now finally over and- I just feel better.”

“That’s great,” Oliver whispered.

He straightened back up and beckoned for Felicity to get up, too. When she did so, Oliver sat down in the rocking chair and pulled her onto his lap, wrapping his arms around her tightly and kissing her forehead. Felicity melted against him, leaning her head against his shoulder and watching their daughter, who was now finally about to fall back asleep. They stayed quiet for a long time, just enjoying the moment.

Once Felicity could turn her eyes away from Millie, she looked back at Oliver and smiled. His eyes met hers immediately and he smiled back, perking up his eyebrow in question.

“What?” he asked when she didn’t answer.

Felicity’s smile widened and she put his hand to her baby bump, enjoying the warmth of his fingers that seeped through her top. Oliver watched their linked hands on the baby bump for a moment before he lifted his gaze and smiled at her again.

“I don’t know if I have ever really said it, at least lately, but I am really excited for this baby to come.”

Oliver smiled. “So am I.”

Felicity lifted hand to stroke through his stubble and locked her eyes with him. Only a few seconds later she straightened up enough to kiss his lips gently. When their lips parted, their foreheads came to rest against each other’s, their noses bumping against each other’s with every intake of breath.

Eventually, Felicity pulled away with a smile and said, “We have so many things to catch up on by the way. We have to talk names and-“

“One step at a time,” Oliver interrupted her. “There is still a lot of time and we are kind of experts in everything baby-related.”

Felicity chuckled. “Well, that’s the perk of doing things again and again.”

Oliver nodded. “Very true.”

Sighing, Felicity leaned her head back and smiled at Oliver. He smiled back at her, tightening his arms around her and Millie.

“I think I could fall asleep like this,” Felicity whispered.

“Then you fall asleep like this,” Oliver suggested.

“And you?” Felicity asked.

Oliver smiled. “I am going to hold you and watch you sleep.”

“You should get some sleep yourself,” Felicity replied with a yawn, suddenly really feeling tired. “We could take Millie to bed with us and with ‘we’ I mean you carry both of us.”

“I think we are fine here and watching you sleep is just as relaxing as sleeping myself.”

“You’re just too hold to carry us over there,” Felicity mumbled, already feeling about to fall asleep. She snuggled her cheek against Oliver’s shoulder and sighed contently. “You’re old.”

“I am not,” Oliver grumbled under his breath.

“Yes, you are,” Felicity replied sleepily. “I am going to keep you anyway.”

She felt Oliver smile against her forehead when he kissed it.

“In that case, I can peacefully grow old,” he whispered back.

Felicity wanted to keep teasing him and tell him that he already was old, but sleep had already taken over.


	221. Growing up

“Ga-ba-ba-ba.”

Felicity chuckled, tapping the plastic spoon on the tip of Millie’s nose gently. The little girl squealed happily and reached out her hand to take the spoon from her mother. Felicity gave it to her and Millie used it as a drumstick on the table of her high chair. She used her free hand to push a piece of banana into her mouth and chewed happily.

“Ga-ga!” she called out then, looking at her mother intently. “Ga-ga-ba.”

“I think she wants to tell us a story,” Tommy said and laughed around his spoon with cereal, “but she can’t talk yet.”

“Well, maybe she is going to say her first word soon,” Felicity stated.

“Isn’t that a little soon?” William asked.

“I think we can expect it to happen when she is between ten and twelve months,” Felicity replied. “Sometimes it’s sooner and sometimes it’s later. It’s not completely impossible, though.”

“Maybe her first word can be Emmy,” Emmy suggested with a huge smile and turned to William. “Tommy’s first word was my name.”

“And Emmy’s first word?” Tommy asked his mother.

“Daddy of course,” Oliver replied, stepping into the kitchen. He kissed the top of Millie’s head when he went past her to the coffee machine. “What else should it have been?”

Felicity looked at William and explained, “My kids are all traitors when it comes to their first word. It should have been mama, but I wasn’t worth their first word it seems. I have no hope it will be any different with Millie.”

“My first word was mama,” William said.

Felicity cocked her head, shooting him a mocking look. “Yeah, just twist the knife in my heart, honey.”

Oliver chuckled behind her and kissed her shoulder before he lifted Tommy from his chair to sit down there with his son in his lap. He took a sip from his coffee, but quickly put the mug away when Tommy offered him a spoon of his cereal. Smiling, Felicity watched Tommy feeding his father the rest of his breakfast.

Felicity loved when they all had the time to eat together. It was always a little chaotic because the kids, especially Emmy and Tommy, always had a lot to tell and with Millie’s babbles it could get quite loud around the table. Felicity wouldn’t want it any other way, though. She loved when the entire family was gathered and everyone had fun. She preferred some animated chaos over deadly silence all the time.

“Finished!” Emmy called out when she had eaten the last of her toast.

“Well, then go into your room and get your backpack,” Felicity replied. “Daddy’s going to drive you to school.”

“I come, too!” Tommy called out while Emmy was already running out of the kitchen.

“Of course, you come, too. I couldn’t drive her without my favorite car-buddy,” Oliver replied and kissed Tommy’s cheek before he turned to William. “Should I drop you at Queen Incorporated on the way?”

“No, Mr. Holt told me to start later today because there is some presentation in the department of applied science late today that he told me I should join in on,” William explained. “He said it should be fun.”

“Well, I hope he also told you to call you Curtis because otherwise I would have to have a serious conversation with him,” Felicity said.

William chuckled. “He did tell me to call him Curtis. I just always forget.”

Felicity smiled. “Good.”

She would have been surprised if it had been different Felicity thought to herself. When she had visited QI to make sure everything was prepared for William’s internship, she had also talked to some of the people that would be responsible for William as long as he was there. She had hoped that she had made perfectly clear that she expected him as well as all their interns of any age to be treated with respect and introduced to the work at the company. They didn’t have interns from schools often since most of their interns were already at college, so she had needed to reinforce that even the younger interns wouldn’t be pushed aside to get their supervisors coffee all of the time. She herself had always hated internships like that and she had never learned anything from that, so she had always made sure interns were satisfied at QI.

When Emmy came back downstairs, Oliver quickly downed the rest of his coffee and got up with Tommy on his hip. He kissed Felicity’s cheek and the top of Millie’s head before he headed out to take their oldest daughter to kindergarten. Millie looked after her daddy and two older siblings until they heard the door falling shut behind them.

“Ga-ga-ba,” she said, looking at her mother.

Felicity smiled. “Yeah, daddy is taking Emmy to kindergarten.”

Millie turned her head to the door once more and pointed her finger in the direction, looking at Felicity with her big, blue eyes. “Ga-ba.”

“No, you can’t go with them. You still have your banana,” Felicity told her.

She lifted a piece of the banana to give it to Millie, but she turned her head away. With a low sigh, Felicity put the rest of the breakfast away, knowing that Millie wasn’t going to eat it anyway. Just when she got up to clear the table, William cleared his throat slightly.

“Felicity?”

Felicity lifted her gaze to see William looking at her, hesitation in his eyes. He looked like Oliver when he was considering asking her something and wasn’t sure if he really should ask her. Smiling, Felicity cocked her head and perked up her eyebrows in question.

“What’s up?” she asked when William didn’t say anything.

“Uhm, I was wondering if maybe I could invite a friend over to study together.”

“Of course. Your friends are always welcome.”

“Thanks,” William said, nodding his head.

“Sure,” Felicity replied with a smile. She started another attempt of getting up to clear the table, but again stopped at the expression on William’s face. She frowned slightly. “Is there anything more?”

“I… uhm…” William started, staring down at his hands. Then he sighed and looked at her. “This friend is actually a girl.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows, a surprised smile spreading on her lips. William was fifteen, so she guessed it was perfectly natural for him to show interest in girls or boys or both for that matter now. They just hadn’t talked about anything like this yet and as far as she knew, neither had Oliver talked to him about this.

“Are you and her…?” Felicity asked, ending the question with a vague movement of her hand.

“No,” William replied immediately, shaking his head. “No, we are not. I just… I know her from school, but I haven’t talked to her much. Before the internship started, we got into a conversation, though, and she told me she had problems with biology and asked me if we could study for the test together, so…”

He shrugged his shoulder, puckering his lips slightly. Felicity didn’t miss the excited expression beneath, though. William seemed to be nervous, but also excited. Actually, it reminded her a little of the way Oliver had looked when he had asked her out on their first date. William reminded her a lot of Oliver lately.

“But you like her?” Felicity asked.

William nodded. “Kind of.”

“Well, studying is surely a good starting point,” Felicity told him. “You know, before your dad and I went out on our first date, we were kind of studying together, too.”

“You two? Studying together for what?”

“Oh, there were problems with the company. It was managed by Isabel Rochev, who has been quite the b-i-t-c-h – for the record, I never even spelled that word in front of you - for a while, but then she died and the board had to find someone new. Oliver and I were studying together, so he would make a competent impression at the board meeting. I was trying to turn him into cooperate master of the universe,” Felicity explained with a reverent smile and sighed. “Unfortunately, it didn’t help. The CEO position was handed over to someone else.”

“Ray Palmer,” William said, nodding his head. “Mr. Ho- Curtis told me.”

Felicity smiled. “Well, we didn’t get together after the studying, but we did have that first date because of it. Who knows, maybe you can ask her to go see a movie together or something. Or she could stay over for dinner… though… well, I guess that would be scaring her off.”

“She’s an only-child, so I guess it would,” William replied with a chuckle.

“I guess even kids with siblings could get scared off by this pack,” Felicity replied. When Millie squealed at those words, hitting her plastic spoon on the table of her high chair, Felicity turned to her youngest daughter. “Are you already practicing scaring people off?”

Again, Millie squealed and Felicity tickled the soles of the baby’s feet. Millie kicked her feet against her mother’s fingers, so Felicity let go and lifted her into her arms instead. She wanted to pull her close for some cuddle, but Millie had other plans. She leaned forward and started pulling closer everything that was in her reach. Felicity kept her from throwing the cutlery to the floor, though. William quickly took care that nothing breakable was in her reach.

“Thanks,” Felicity said, readjusting Millie’s position on her lap to hold her farther away from the table. She ignored the dissatisfied cry Millie released in response and told William, “I feel guilty. Whenever you are here, you have so much to do with your siblings. You really need to tell if it gets too much for you. Your dad and I don’t want you to feel like we are just inviting you over to have a free babysitter.”

“Dad said the same thing a while ago,” William replied.

“Well, Oliver and I are usually in synch with things like that,” Felicity explained with a smile, “so in case you feel used or… whatever… just tell us.”

“I enjoy being here,” William told her and shrugged his shoulders.

“Glad to hear that.”

Felicity smiled. She knew that William felt comfortable here and she also knew that he knew that he could tell Oliver or her if he needed time for himself or whatever. Sometimes Felicity felt she needed to say it nonetheless, just to be sure.

“You are actually the first person I told about Audrey, the girl from school.”

“You didn’t even tell your mom?” Felicity asked, pleasantly surprised about William’s revelation. “Or a friend?”

William shook his head. “It would be weird to talk to my mom about it. Besides, she would get super-excited and that would be so embarrassing.”

Felicity chuckled. “Mothers have the right to be embarrassing. It’s part of the job.”

“Anyway, I didn’t feel like telling her.”  William shrugged his shoulders again. “And I can’t really tell dad, either. It would just be weird telling them. I don’t want some embarrassing talk about… girls and… flowers and bees.”

Felicity chuckled at the face William made. She remembered the talk her mother had had with her when Felicity had been William’s age. It had been a nightmare. Actually, Felicity still had nightmares about it now. Her mother with her loose tongue and little inhibition had made it probably the most embarrassing ten minutes of her life.

“Oliver and I flipped a coin on who has to tell the children,” Felicity explained, “and it chose him. You did well to tell me instead of him. He would have definitely started a talk about flowers and bees. Or the stork.”

William chuckled. “Yeah, that would have been awkward.”

“And so would have been the rest of the three weeks here.”

“Especially when we are going climbing at the weekend,” William added. He nodded to himself for a few moments before he asked, “Do you think we can keep it between us for… awhile?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “Oliver doesn’t have to know until you want to tell him.”

“What do I not have to know?”

“Oliver,” Felicity said surprised, smiling at him quickly. “I didn’t hear you coming in.”

“Well, I came through the garage,” Oliver replied, continuing to smile at her amusedly. “What do I not have to know?”

“There is a lot that you don’t have to know,” Felicity explained. She got up and handed Millie over to him. “What you should know, though, is that your daughter needs a new diaper. So go and make yourself useful.”

Oliver puckered his lips and narrowed his eyes at her mockingly before he turned his gaze to Millie and bounced her up and down on his arms until she squealed happily. Then he asked her, “Do you want to tell me what William and mommy are keeping from me?”

Felicity shared a short look with William, who smiled at her in silent gratitude before he turned to watch his father and youngest sister. Felicity started clearing the table in the meantime, just shooting short looks towards Oliver and Millie every now and then.

“Ba-ga-ba,” Millie babbled.

“Nah, we really need to work on your language if you are supposed to spy for me,” Oliver said and kissed her cheek. “Can you say ‘mama’? Come on, Millie, say ‘mama’.”

“Ba-ba,” Millie replied.

“Mama,” Oliver said once more.

“Ba-ba,” Millie repeated in response.

Oliver smiled and kissed her cheek once more. “We will practice this.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows and cocked her head, putting the dirty dishes to the kitchen counter and opening the dishwasher. “Since when do you teach our children how to say ‘mama’? I thought they were all supposed to say ‘dada’ first.”

“Didn’t keep Tommy from saying a different word first,” William stated.

“Yeah, but I would have bet your dad would only try harder after that,” Felicity said and puckered her lips, narrowing her eyes at Oliver mockingly. “What are you up to, Mister?”

“Why do I have to be up to something?” Oliver asked, frowning at her.

Felicity gave him a look that made Oliver grin. When Oliver did something that was unusually sweet of him, in most cases that meant that he had done something wrong with one of her computers and was trying to sweettalk her until she was unable to be mad. In most cases, to Felicity’s utter annoyance, it actually worked.

“Are you up to something?” Felicity asked.

“No,” Oliver replied. He adjusted Millie’s position on his hip and kissed the tip of their daughter’s nose. “I just felt like it was time that one of our children would say ‘mama’ first, so I figured I should practice with Millie already. If she doesn’t say it, at least I am practiced on practicing our next baby.”

William frowned, shooting a look back over his shoulder. “You are practiced in practicing?”

“It’s her fault,” Oliver replied, nodding towards Felicity. “Her babbling infects everyone close. Trust me, when your internship is over, you will be talking in sentence fragments every day.”

Felicity cocked her head. “Are you trying to distract from the subject?”

“Maybe,” Oliver replied honestly, “but you will never know because I have to change Millie’s diaper.”

“Mhm,” Felicity hummed, watching Oliver smiling at her innocently before he turned around and left. With mocking voice, she called after him, “I still don’t trust you, Babe.”

Oliver didn’t reply. William chuckled at that, though. “You two are one of these terribly annoying married couples, you know?”

“I am just going to take that as a compliment for how great my marriage words, so thanks,” Felicity replied and winked at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few snippets of my plotting process for chapter 224 in case someone is interested: 
> 
> http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/161055397835/smkkbert-smkkbert-i-am-taking-notes-for-the


	222. No more surprises

“We should get a VIP pass given how often we are here.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow, cocking her head at her husband. “You don’t really believe that there is a VIP longue here, right?”

“Well, there should be,” Oliver replied with whispered voice, putting his arm over the back of her chair to lean even closer. “The chairs here are terribly uncomfortable and the coffee here is unpalatable. There should be a VIP longue with comfortable chairs and delicious coffee for loyal patients.”

“Even if there was a VIP longue, we wouldn’t be here often enough to earn the pass,” Felicity whispered back, patting Oliver’s thigh gently. “Sorry, hon.”

“We wouldn’t be here often enough?” Oliver gave her in incredulous look. “We always took the prenatal check-ups very serious, so of course we went to each appointment, and this is our forth baby, so that’s a hell of a lot of check-ups. Besides, we got pregnant again within less than half a year after Millie was born. We have been here like almost every month for the last one and a half years.”

“Trust me, there are people who come here more often,” Felicity replied, leaning her head back against his arm.

“For what?”

 Closing her eyes with a sigh, she stroked her hand up and down his thigh and replied, “Women that are at high risk of getting cancer as well as women with cancer or women who had cancer and need regular check-ups. Couples that have problems getting pregnant and need special treatment. Couples with a difficult pregnancy that-“

“Okay, I take it back,” Oliver interrupted her. “I am perfectly fine with uncomfortable chairs and undrinkable coffee. Who wants a VIP pass anyway?”

Felicity smiled, turning her head to smile at Oliver soundly. “We have been here a lot, but I think it could be a lot worse.”

“Most definitely,” Oliver agreed, taking her hand from his thigh and kissing the palm. When he rested their linked fingers against his chest right over his heart, he asked, “Do you think we are in for any surprise today?”

“Like what?” Felicity asked back.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. Maybe the baby has eleven toes or two heads or… suddenly triplets are showing.”

Felicity pinched his side firmly, causing Oliver to whine out quietly. Screwing up his face, he rubbed his fingers over the aching spot between his ribs soothingly. He shot her an angry look, but it was so halfhearted that Felicity didn’t even bat an eye. Her kids had been staring at her more angrily than Oliver in this moment.

“The triplet-thing wasn’t funny when I was pregnant with Millie and it is even less funny now,” Felicity replied. “We are going to have five children as it is which, I know, literally speaking are a handful, but metaphorically speaking a lot more.”

“You could have-“

“Mrs. Queen?”

As they got up to follow the doctor’s assistant to the examination room, Oliver grumbled something under his breath that Felicity couldn’t understand. She laced her fingers through his on their way to the doctor and shot him an apologetic smile, leaning her head against his shoulder. Whatever half-hearted anger he had shown, disappeared. With a breathless chuckle, he kissed the crown of her head and squeezed her hand.

The doctor’s assistant opened the door for them. Felicity realized that Oliver’s words still held some truth when they stepped in. They had been here a lot lately. They sat down in front of the desk while the assistant put a file onto his desk and smiled at them.

“Dr. Hampton is going to be here for you in-“

“Already here,” Dr. Hampton interrupted his assistant, walking past her into the room. “Thank you, Nancy.”

Nancy left while Dr. Hampton greeted Oliver and Felicity with a shake of their hands. His warm and polite smile eased some of the tension Felicity always felt rising before these appointments. Even check-ups could put her into a quite nervous mood.

“You look a lot better than they last time you’ve been here, Mrs. Queen,” Dr. Hampton said, shooting her a smile, while he was walking around the desk and sat down behind it. Without any pause, he opened the file Nancy had put there before and asked, “How are you feeling?”

“Great,” Felicity replied honestly. “I have been feeling a lot better since the holidays and within the last days it’s really like I am completely back to myself.”

“That are really good news,” he replied, taking a note in the file. “The tiredness and lack of enthusiasm?”

“Gone for the most part,” Felicity answered. “I am quite tired every now and then, but given that I am pregnant and have four kids, including a baby under the age of a year, I think I have the right to be.”

Dr. Hampton chuckled. “That is very true.”

He asked her a few more questions about her physical and emotional health, all the while taking notes in the file. He seemed to be quite satisfied with her answers because he nodded constantly, shooting her a smile every now and then. The last few times she had been here, his face had shown much more worry since the depression had been heavy on her during this pregnancy and it had partly shown in her physical health, too. He had told her that it hadn’t been too bad yet, but something they had needed to keep a close eye on.

After taking her weight and measuring her blood pressure, he put his pen aside and stated, “In that case, we are ready for the ultrasound.”

Felicity got up and went over to the examination table, Oliver following close behind her. She pulled down her pants a little to free the baby bump and lay down, tugging up her pullover until the fabric pooled under her chin. Oliver stepped close to her side, holding one of her hand between both of his. When Felicity smiled at him, sure that her face didn’t hide any of her excitement about seeing their baby on the screen again and seeing how much it had grown, he smiled back at her, squeezing her fingers.

Dr. Hampton sat down on a chair next to the examination table and grabbed the bottle with the gel. When he applied it to her belly, Felicity flinched slightly at the coldness. Dr. Hampton smiled apologetically in response.

“Since this is the forth pregnancy we three are experiencing together, I am almost sure I already know the answer, but I am going to ask nonetheless,” Dr. Hampton stated. “Do you want to know the baby’s sex?”

Oliver chuckled. “There have been heated discussions about that during the last three pregnancies,” he explained. “Since Felicity, for whatever reasons, loves surprises and I just can’t say no to her, I have to say no to you.”

Dr. Hampton chuckled. “I could tell just you.”

“I would probably give it away by accident as soon as the opportunity is there,” Oliver replied. He kissed the knuckles of Felicity’s hand. “I’d rather not take the risk.”

“I absolutely understand that.”

Felicity looked at Oliver for a long moment, scrutinizing the expression on his face. He seemed to be completely content, a quiet smile playing on his lips. When he caught her eyes on him, his smile widened and leaned down to brush his lips against Felicity’s. The kiss made a thousand little butterflies flutter in her stomach and giving her a tingling feeling all over her body.

When Dr. Hampton put the head of the ultrasound to Felicity’s belly, she and Oliver both turned their heads to look at the screen. It didn’t take long until they could see the shadows of their baby. Given that this was their forth pregnancy together, they were almost experts at seeing exactly what they were meant to see – their baby’s head and body, the legs and arms and everything else. Admittedly, since Felicity was twenty-three weeks along, it wasn’t much of a talent to see these things in the black and white shadows on the screen.

“The baby allows a perfect view today,” Dr. Hampton said with a smile. He moved the screen, so Oliver and Felicity could take a better look and started telling them what was to see. Oliver and Felicity didn’t interrupt him because although they could recognize everything without further explanation, it was nice to have a doctor confirming them that the baby was perfectly healthy as he did at the end of his explanations. “The baby looks strong and healthy.”

Felicity turned her head to smile at Oliver and he smiled back at her, mouthing, “Strong and healthy.”

Felicity felt a load taking off her mind she hadn’t even known was there before, at least not this heavy. Since the depression had started, she had worried about their baby. She knew that the depression could cause problems in the baby’s development. She was relieved to know that hadn’t happened.

“By the way, the baby is in the perfect position for me to tell you the sex,” Dr. Hampton told them with a smirk. “Last chance for today.”

Puckering her lips, Felicity turned to look at Oliver and cocked her head at him slightly. He wiggled his eyebrows in response, grinning at her. It made Felicity chuckle.

“Okay, fine,” she said, shaking her head amusedly, “You won.”

“I won?”

“Yes, you won,” Felicity repeated, lifting her hands to admit defeat. “We went my way three times, well, two and a half since the whole situation with Tommy’s name and knowing about his sex was messy, but we went my way a lot. If you want to know the baby’s sex, Dr. Hampton can tell us, but only if you swear you won’t tell anyone.”

“Not even the kids?”

“Especially not the kids,” Felicity replied. “If they know, everyone will know.”

“And we don’t want everyone to know because…?”

“Oliver,” Felicity said, squeezing his hand, “please.”

She knew from Lyla that once she had told people that she was expecting a boy, they had started suggesting names and even putting her off some of the names she had loved very much. They were also asking why she wouldn’t paint the walls in the nursery blue and so on. She said it hadn’t been that bad when she had told people her first baby was a girl. It seemed like people had gotten a little bit too comfortable with butting into Lyla’s and John’s life like that, giving advice that wasn’t wanted and sticking their noses into things that wasn’t theirs to talk about.

Chuckling lowly, Oliver leaned down and kissed Felicity’s forehead. He nuzzled her nose with his and kissed the tip of it. Then he pecked her lips and whispered against them, “I won’t tell anyone. I promise.”

When he pulled away, they smiled at each other for a long moment, making sure they were both okay with the decision. They turned their heads to look at Dr. Hampton expectantly and he grinned.

“You are expecting a little” – Dr. Hampton made a meaningful pause – “baby girl.”

A baby girl, just like she had thought it would be. Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver, smiling at him happily, and his face beamed with happiness in response.

“I am going to print you a picture of your daughter,” Dr. Hampton stated. “My printer doesn’t work currently, so I will have to go to the reception. I’ll be back.”

Neither Oliver nor Felicity looked after him as he left. They just kept smiling at each other until Oliver bent down and captured Felicity’s lips with his in a gentle kiss.

“A little girl,” he stated.

“A little girl,” Felicity repeated. After a moment longer, she frowned, though. “Is it weird that we are so happy just because we know it’s a girl? We wouldn’t be any less happy or any happier if it was a boy. Right?”

“Of course we wouldn’t,” Oliver replied. “Knowing the sex just makes it more real, at least for me. I can basically see the little girl with curly, blonde hair in front of me.”

Felicity smiled reverently. “It really is a nice thought.”

She hoped the baby would have Oliver’s eyes like she had hoped with all their children. She always felt like if you just looked long enough into Oliver’s eyes, the deep blue color of his eyes would pull her under and embrace her in its warmth. Babies with that eyes could probably end wars.

“Now we have to find a name for her.”

“Well, maybe not like right now,” Felicity replied, cocking her head. “Let’s just enjoy that we know it’s a girl and give me some time to think about all the things we girl can outvote you on now that we are in the majority.”

Oliver rolled his eyes, bending down a little. With mocking voice, he asked, “Are you sure they won’t rather agree with me? Emmy’s a daddy’s girl and I am sure Millie is already growing up to be one, too. I am going to make sure it won’t be any different with this baby here.”

“No, she will definitely be on my side,” Felicity disagreed.

Oliver grinned in response. “The war is on, Mrs. Queen.”

“Don’t waste time to sharp your arrows. You entered an already lost battle.”

“We will see about that.”

They grinned at each other for a long moment before Oliver leaned down and kissed Felicity gently. She chuckled against his lips, but the sweet, innocent kiss soon turned into more as they both enjoyed the moment of intimacy that they shared only with each other and their baby. They didn’t pull apart until Dr. Hampton reentered the examination room, clearing his throat and breaking the moment, at least for the time being.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you missed my process on writing chapter 224 - still not finished - [here’s the latest update](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/161251506395/smkkbert-smkkbert-smkkbert-smkkbert-i). 


	223. The cool dad

Felicity woke up to two little hands gently slapping her cheeks. For the break of a second, she wondered if maybe she had passed out and people were now trying to make her regain consciousness. As soon as the thought had come to her mind, she pushed it away again. With a slight frown, Felicity opened her eyes and smiled when she found Millie sitting on the mattress next to her, smiling at her mommy happily.

“Hi, baby,” Felicity said with still tired voice and released a long yawn. She pulled Millie closer until the baby was resting right against her chest. Then she kissed the crown of her daughter’s head and told her, “Mommy didn’t even realize she fell asleep with you. That’s what happens when mommy lies down to cuddle for just five minutes.”

Millie hadn’t seemed happy when Felicity had tried to lie her down for her nap earlier. That was why she had decided to take her daughter into her own bed and lie down for some cuddles there instead until the baby had fallen asleep and Felicity could put her into her crib. She must have fallen asleep with Millie.

Felicity kissed the top of Millie’s head once more before she angled her head back to shoot a look at the clock on her nightstand. Millie hadn’t napped as long as Felicity would have hoped, but it was certainly enough to get the ten-month-old through the rest of the day. She would just put her to bed a little bit earlier tonight if she got tired.

As soon as Felicity got out of bed, Millie crawled towards her and reached her hands out for her. With a quick movement of her hands, Felicity smoothed some of the wrinkles out of her dress and lifted her youngest daughter into her arms after that. She kissed her rosy cheek and suggested, “Come on, Millie. We go downstairs and check what daddy is doing.”

Felicity strolled down the stairs, bouncing Millie up and down on her hip until she giggled. Then she went over to the living room and frowned when she realized that Oliver wasn’t there. Shrugging her shoulders, she figured that he might have decided to use the hours without the kids – Millie had been napping. Emmy was at Deepa’s place. Tommy was eating ice cream with Barry, who had run over from Central City to spend some time with his godson, and William was studying for a biology test with a friend – to check if everything was alright in the Arrow Cave.

“You are going to wait down here and play with your elephant for a little while,” Felicity told Millie, putting her into the playpen. She grabbed Millie’s favorite stuffed toy from the couch and handed it over to the baby, who pulled it against her chest immediately. “Mommy is going into the kitchen and get you a yoghurt.”

While Felicity was heading to the kitchen, she thought to herself how easy Millie was making this for her. With the growing baby belly, that she felt was already bigger now than it had been in the last week of pregnancy with Millie last year, it wasn’t easy to carry Millie around for long. The little girl made it easy since she was perfectly fine staying alone in her playpen for a few minutes without having anyone staying within sight. Emmy and Tommy would have destroyed the playpen if Felicity had dared to leave them alone for just a couple of minutes.

Felicity just opened the door of the fridge when William strolled into the kitchen, a slightly annoyed expression on his face.

“That bad?” Felicity asked, cocking her head at him.

William had invited a friend over to study though studying was actually just a pretense to spend some time with the girl from his class. Felicity was the only one who knew that William had crush on that girl, though. He hadn’t told Oliver or his mother, at least not yet. Felicity had told him that studying together was certainly a good starting point to maybe start a conversation about other things or begin a friendship, too. If his facial expression was any indication, maybe she had advised him wrong.

“No, it was going great,” William replied, grabbing three glasses from the kitchen cabinet. “At least as long as we have been alone.”

Felicity stirred in Millie’s yoghurt, shooting her stepson a compassionate look. “She brought a friend?”

“No,” William replied. “Dad decided to join us.”

Felicity’s hand stilled with the plastic spoon still between her fingers. She perked up her eyebrows, looking at William incredulously. He couldn’t be serious. William shrugged his shoulders and slightly rolled his eyes, though, confirming that it was true indeed.

“Your dad joined you for the studying?”

William nodded, leaning back against the kitchen counter and crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Yes. He came upstairs when we were studying, so I introduced him to Audrey. I thought he just wanted to be nice and wanted to get to know her… like… her name or something. Then he took a look at the stuff we were working on and before I could give him a sign to leave us alone or anything, he got himself a chair and sat down next to us and took over all the explaining.”

“The next time you want some alone-time with a girl, you better study for mathematics or chemistry or something,” Felicity mumbled, but quickly smiled the words away when William shot her a look. “Your dad has no idea about biology, at least not like that.”

“He does understand a lot about Mendel’s law, though,” William replied.

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Genetics, of course.”

Again, William shrugged his shoulders and sighed. “He just wants to help. I know that. Yet it’s kind of annoying.”

“Of course it is,” Felicity agreed, shaking her head with a sigh. “I am sure your dad doesn’t even realize that he is bothering you.”

“Of course he doesn’t,” William replied. “If he knew, he wouldn’t be sitting upstairs. I know that. I also know that he just means well. I just don’t know how to get rid of him for the moment without making it awkward. Besides, I don’t want Audrey to realize it.”

Felicity put Millie’s yoghurt aside and winked at William. “Mama is going to handle that,” she said and already stepped out of the kitchen when her words caught up to her and she quickly turned back around to him once more. “And when I say ‘mama’, I don’t mean ‘mama-mama’ like ‘mother-mama’. I wasn’t-“

“Got it,” William interrupted her with a smile before she could talk herself into a frenzy.

Felicity smiled at him gratefully and headed upstairs. She wondered why she hadn’t noticed Oliver was in William’s room when she had gotten downstairs after her nap, but she guessed that they had talked quietly and the closed door had muffled their voices additionally. Since the door to William’s room was open now, Felicity heard his voice while still walking upstairs this time. Oliver was sitting at the desk, pointing at a worksheet in front of him.

“Hey,” Felicity said, leaning into the doorframe.

Oliver and Audrey, a pretty girl with brown hair and eyes like a deer, turned around to her.

“Hi,” Oliver said with a wide smile. “Napping over for today?”

Felicity nodded. “Our daughter decided it was time to wake me up.”

“Well, she let us sleep all through the first weeks after she was born, so I guess she was allowed to wake us up for once,” Oliver replied.

“It’s easy for you to talk. You haven’t been the one she woke up,” Felicity told him. She winked at him before she turned to Audrey, who looked back and forth between the two of them a little insecurely. Smiling, Felicity reached out her hand for the girl and approached her. “Hi. Felicity Queen.”

“I’m Audrey,” Audrey replied, shaking Felicity’s hand. “William invited me to study for a biology test.”

“I know. He told me.” Felicity smiled. “Is it going well?”

“Yes. William is really great at explaining all of this,” Audrey answered. “I am not that good at biology.”

“Well, neither is Oliver,” Felicity told her, putting a hand on her husband’s shoulder and squeezed it, “which is why we two will leave William and you to the studying now.”

“Hey, I do know a lot about biology,” Oliver complained. “It’s Mendel’s law. It’s one of the few things I remember from school.”

“Yes, but I am sure the kids get along without us just fine,” Felicity explained. “They will tell us if they need help and then I will find out what to do.”

“William told me that you are a genius, Mrs. Queen,” Audrey said, looking at her nosily.

“Please just call me Felicity.”

At the same time Oliver said, “She absolutely is.”

“School must have been so easy for you.”

“Well, it kind of was.“ Felicity shrugged her shoulders with a smile before she turned to Oliver once more. “Come on, we leave the kids alone.”

“We could-“

“Oliver,” Felicity interrupted him with strict voice, but quickly put on a smile when Oliver cocked his head at her, his face showing confusion, “Millie spilled her yoghurt in her playpen and I can’t bend over far enough to clean it.”

She stroked her hand over her baby bump and gave Oliver a meaningful smile. Oliver hesitated, the confusion in his face increasing slightly even though he tried to hide it with a smile.

“Okay then,” he said eventually and got up. “You kids have fun.”

“Thanks for your help, Mr. Queen,” Audrey answered.

“Sure. If you need anything more-“

“-then they will tell us,” Felicity interrupted Oliver, took his hand and pulled him out of the room just when William appeared at the head of the stairs. She took the third glass he was carrying as she was walking past him and whispered, “That won’t be needed now.”

She walked downstairs quickly and only let go of Oliver’s hand once they had reached the foot of the stairs. She could still feel his confusion. Yet she went right into the kitchen to get Millie’s yoghurt. Oliver, after a short pause, headed to the living room. Felicity followed him.

“Where did she spill her yoghurt?” Oliver asked when Felicity stepped into the living room and closed the door behind them. “I don’t see anything.”

“That’s because she didn’t get her yoghurt yet,” Felicity replied and sat down on the couch, shooting Oliver a proud smile.

“What-?”

“Can you get Millie here please?” Felicity asked.

Oliver frowned at her for a moment longer before he lifted Millie from the playpen and carried her over to the couch. The little girl crawled away from her daddy and to her mommy immediately. When she reached out her hand for the yoghurt, Felicity pulled Millie further back onto the seating surface of the couch until Millie’s back rested against the backrest. Then she put a blanket over her legs, so they would only have to wash the blanket when Millie spilled the yoghurt which was bound to happen since the little girl loved to eat on her own, but wasn’t exactly practiced with that yet.

“Here you go,” Felicity said and handed Millie the yoghurt.

She dipped the plastic spoon into the yoghurt and licked it off the spoon after that eagerly. Felicity smiled, just watching Millie for a long moment. She loved when the kids were growing up and trying new things to figure out what they could and couldn’t do. Watching the kids experimenting with their abilities and the world around them was one of the most wonderful parts of being a mother.

“Are you going to tell me now why you made me leave William’s room by lying to me about Millie’s yoghurt?” Oliver asked her, cocking his head.

Felicity rested her elbow on the headrest of the couch and leaned her head against her head. She smiled at Oliver when she answered, “You were bothering them.”

“No, I wasn’t,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “I was the cool dad who still knows a lot about school because he’s still young and can help.”

“You, my dear, were the annoying dad, who didn’t get that your son invited a girl over for studying because he has a crush on her and wanted to spend time alone with her,” Felicity corrected him. “They wanted to be alone, Oliver, or William wanted to be alone with her at least.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “You’re serious?”

Felicity nodded. “Deadly serious.”

“But how do you know?” Oliver asked.

“William told me,” Felicity replied. “He asked me if he could invite Audrey and told me that he has a crush on her.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because he asked me not to,” Felicity replied. “He didn’t want any embarrassing sex-talk.”

Oliver frowned. “Do you think that would have been necessary?”

Felicity puckered her lips for a moment, thinking carefully about her answer. “I doubt it.”

She watched Oliver closely. He released a long breath, mimicking her position with his head propped up on his hand. His gaze was lowered onto Millie, but he almost seemed to be looking right through her. Smiling compassionately, Felicity reached out her hand and put it to Oliver’s cheek. Immediately he looked up and into her eyes. Felicity didn’t need to ask for Oliver to know that she wanted to know if he was alright because before Felicity had said anything, he took her hand and kissed the palm of it.

“My son is thinking about dating,” Oliver stated.

Felicity nodded. “He is a teenager. It was bound to happen eventually.”

“Yes, of course,” Oliver replied. “I remember when I was a teenager and a little older. I made a lot of mistakes.”

“Even though I think that William doesn’t want to emulate you regarding past behavior, maybe that is something you want to talk with him about to share your experience,” Felicity told him. “I also think that talk might be better to have with him than a sex-talk.”

Oliver nodded slowly, leaning his face into her touch once more. With a smile on her lips, Felicity stroked her thumb over his cheekbones, giving him time.

“It’s just weird, you know?” Oliver asked eventually. “Emmy starting kindergarten already felt so weird to me because it’s still like she was born yesterday. Now William is dating girls. In my heart, they are still little children.”

“They grow up so quickly,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head with a sigh. “I know.”

She had thought the same a few times before. Time passed by so quickly, especially when the children were still young. One moment they were born, the next they were already crawling around and the blink of an eye later, they were walking and talking and gaining more independency almost every day. It was almost a little scaring how quickly the kids grew up.

Oliver nodded to himself for a moment before he leaned down until his face was on the same level as Millie’s. The little girl only shot her daddy a short look before she continued eating the yoghurt, spilling some of it on the blanket over her legs.

“You aren’t joining in in all this growing up too fast, right?” Oliver asked her. “You are going to stay daddy’s little girl.”

He leaned further forward to kiss her, but Millie reached out a hand and put it to his lips. Releasing an unhappy sound and looking at her daddy grumpily, she pushed him away as far as her arm allowed. Oliver looked at her with mocking offense, puckering his lips and narrowing his eyes at her.

“Yeah, yeah, daddy gets the message,” he grumbled and scooted over to where Felicity was sitting. With a long sigh, he lay down and rested his head on her baby belly, stroking his hand up and down the curve slowly. Felicity smiled, combing her fingers through his short hair. He kissed the baby belly and whispered, “At least you are not growing up so quickly, okay?”

“Honey?” Felicity asked.

“Hm?” Oliver hummed, angling his head to look at her.

Felicity grinned amusedly. “It’s a little early to ask her that. She isn’t even born yet.”

“We can never start too early,” Oliver replied, his grin matching hers. “We didn’t tell Millie from the start and now she is already eating alone… well… or at least she tries.”

Felicity turned her head to see Millie trying to get more of the yoghurt into her mouth with her hand. Big drops of yoghurt spilled onto the blanket as she did so and Millie splashed her hand into it, squealing delightedly. Felicity smiled at their daughter’s excitement.

“I know we should probably stop her before our entire living room is covered in yoghurt, but I can’t get myself to stop her,” Oliver said, snuggling his cheek to her baby belly. “I love watching her explore things.”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied. She sighed and cradled Oliver’s head to her baby bump. “Let’s just let her explore the yoghurt for a little longer. We need to wash the blanket anyway.”

“Exactly.”

Felicity kissed the crown of Oliver’s head, smiling to herself. She knew that even if Oliver wasn’t sure how to feel about their children growing up so fast, he would never stop them or stand in their way, neither of them would. They would both help their children where they could and let them make the mistakes they might have to make eventually. They were probably kind of cool parents after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The writing process on chapter 224 is finished. We have a product of 22,601 words (=46 pages). I am probably going to post it next Wednesday. It will be the only chapter that week given the length. I mean… it’s longer than one of my multi-chapters…


	224. Vertigo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT MESSAGES:
> 
> 1\. This is a 5x08 inspired chapter without aliens. It's in no way what I would have liked to see for 5x08, especially since Arrow and Time for a story are quite different...
> 
> 2\. This is a monster chapter, basically as long as a small multi-chapter. That being said, I am not sure when I will get to post a new chapter because I have a lot to do for school. Like I told you already, my schedule will be unpredictable until the beginning of September and right now seems like a time that there is little time to write, especially since I am also working on my multi-chapter "To make you feel my love". Take this monster as an "apology in advance" for the irregular and short chapters lately and the short and irregular updates in the next months. :)

When she woke up at the jarring sound of her phone ringing, Felicity turned her head into the pillow and blindly reached out her arm to make Oliver take the call for her. Her fingers only touched the empty sheet, though. Frowning, Felicity lifted her head from the pillow and opened her eyes to stare at the empty side of the bed. It took her a few seconds before she remembered that Oliver had woken her shortly before midnight with a kiss to her cheek and a whisper into her ear that he was needed in the Arrow Cave and heading out.

Felicity turned onto her side and reached out her hand for her phone. She released a low grumble at the sight of the clock. Three am was really not a time she liked to be woken, especially when it wasn’t one of her kids needing her. They were the only people she could forgive easily for depriving her of her sleep.

Maybe not the only people, Felicity added to her thoughts when she saw John’s face and name on the display of her phone. She sat up quickly, swallowing hard at the tight feeling in her throat. Her heard was racing in her chest, knowing that it was never a good sign when Oliver was out in the field and she got a call from their friend.

“John?” she answered the phone, worry audible in her voice.

“Felicity,” John replied, a sigh falling from his lips, “it’s Oliver.”

One of Felicity’s hand clenched to a fist around a piece of the empty sheet on Oliver’s side of the bed, while the other gripped the phone tighter. She sucked in a deep breath, willing to force back the tears she felt springing to her eyes. She knew she should be used to it by now. After ten years of working at Oliver’s side, he had been hurt and almost killed so often that she really should be used to it by now. She wasn’t used it, though, and she doubted that she would ever get used to it.

“What happened?” Felicity asked, her voice barely loud enough to drown out the silence in the room.

“He was hit with a new version of Vertigo,” John told her. “It’s only been brought into orbit a couple of weeks ago. We didn’t get our hands on the pills yet, so we don’t know exactly how they work, but rumor has it that it makes dreams come true.”

“Which means?” Felicity asked.

“We aren’t sure,” John admitted. “Roy, Laurel and Thea are out to try getting a hold on the pills, so we can analyze them. I am in the lair with Oliver. His heartrate is normal. He almost looks like he is sleeping to be honest.”

“That’s good,” Felicity whispered. She needed a moment to process the news before she pushed away the blanket and got out of bed. “I’ll come to the lair and- Damn it! The kids. I can’t leave them and-“

“Lyla and Sara are already on their way to you. Lyla is taking care of them,” John interrupted her. “Lyla will make sure the kids are taken care of, Emmy gets to kindergarten and William to QI in time tomorrow.”

Felicity nodded. She knew she should probably ask what Lyla would tell the kids where Felicity and Oliver had gone over night. It had been much simpler when something like this had happened the last time because all Felicity had had to do was taking the kids and take them with her to the lair. With Emmy going to kindergarten now and William living here for a few weeks it was much more complicated, though.

She put her hand to her baby bump, moving it up and down like she needed to soothe their unborn daughter when really the baby seemed to be fast asleep as she wasn’t moving. The thought that at least this little nugget wouldn’t notice any of the uproar.

“Felicity?” John asked when she didn’t say anything more.

Complicated or not, Felicity knew it didn’t matter right now. With firm voice she told John, “I am on my way.”

\----->

The first thing Oliver saw when his eyes fluttered open was the woman, who was lying next to him in bed. Her face was turned into the pillow, her head hidden under mussed hair. The blanket had slipped down her naked body, only covering her below the small of her back.

Smiling, Oliver rolled onto his side and propped his head up onto his hand to just watch her. If it was up to him, he could lie in bed and just watch her for hours. Unfortunately, he knew that her alarm would soon go off and wake her. With a short look at the clock, he figured it was way too soon for him to enjoy looking at her much longer. Puckering his lips, Oliver decided, since the alarm would go off in less than five minutes anyway, he could also just start her day by waking her up a lot more gently than her alarm would.

He scooted over to her side of the bed, careful not to wake her yet. He moved down the mattress a little and put a hand to her side, sprawling out his fingers against her ribs. Her skin felt soft and warm under the palm of his hand. She took in a deep breath before she released it with a low sigh. She didn’t wake up or even move, though. When she was sleeping, she couldn’t be woken up easily which was one of the many things he loved so much about her.

Oliver lowered his head slowly. He pressed his nose against the small of her back, breathing her in. The scent of her skin was a mixture of her lavender show gel and a smell that was all hers. It made him feel more at home than the sight of the bedroom that had been his since the day his parents had brought him home from the hospital. Home was where she was and it was something that for a long time he hadn’t been sure he would ever feel for any person. He had grown up and fallen in love with a woman who did make him feel all these things, though.

He angled his head to kiss the small of her back. She released a muffled sound in response, a mixture of a content sigh and an unhappy grumble about being woken up. Oliver smiled against her skin and slowly kissed his way up her spine. His lips never left her body, always staying in touch. When he reached her shoulder blades, he pushed her hair out of the way to kiss up right to her hairline at the back of her neck where three little moles formed a little triangle. He turned his head and rubbed the stubble of his cheek against her skin there.

With a content sigh, she started stirring. She stretched out her legs and turned her head. Her cheek was pressed into the pillow now, her face turned to his side. It was still hidden under her mussed hair, though. Stroking it out of the way, he kissed up the side of her neck and over her jaw and cheek until his nose bumped against hers.

She smiled, stretching herself once more, before she whispered with a content sigh, “Morning.”

“Morning,” Oliver replied.

He leaned forward and kissed her gently, capturing her bottom lip between both of his. It was supposed to be just this one lingering kiss, but when they broke apart and Oliver licked his lips, the taste of her was almost intoxicating. He moved closer to her, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her against him. As soon as their chests pressed together, legs entangling, Oliver rolled them over, so she was pressed into the mattress.

“I love being woken up like this.”

Oliver smiled against her jaw, brushing his lips against her skin there. “I love waking you up like this.”

Their lips found each other’s again in another lingering kiss. His hand traced the side of her body until he reached her knee and he wrapped his leg around his hips to open her to him. With a shallow thrust of his hips he pushed his morning wood against her center through the sheet that separated them. She gasped in response, her mouth opening for him, and Oliver didn’t waste a second to stroke his tongue against hers – morning breath be damned.

She tightened her leg around him, pushing herself closer to him. Her hands moved into his short hair, grabbing some strands and scratching her fingernails over his scalp. Oliver groaned into her mouth, deepening the kiss. He massaged the outside of her thigh, moving his hand to her hip. He gripped the blanket, intending to pull it away and-

“Wait!” Felicity suddenly stopped him, pushing at his shoulders.

Frowning, Oliver propped his upper body up on his forearms and looked at his wife’s face. Her bottom lip was caught between her front teeth, but he quickly freed it with a swipe of his thumb. He put his hand to her cheek, cocking his head in a wordless plead for her to explain why she had stopped him or why she was looking at him with a hesitation that wasn’t normal between them, especially not in a passionate moment that could lead to more.

“Dr. Perez said if possible, we shouldn’t have sex the day before our appointment,” Felicity whispered, a deep blush forming on her cheeks and spreading down her neck and over her chest. “She said something about sperm count and, well, I don’t know.”

Oliver smiled softly and stroked Felicity’s cheekbone with his thumb. When Felicity gave him a smile in return, he kissed her lips gently.

“Right,” he whispered then. “Sorry.”

He rolled off her and pulled her against his chest. Felicity rested her head on his shoulder, stroking her hands up and down his chest. When she leaned forward to kiss his collarbone, Oliver smiled and kissed the top of her head in response.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Felicity whispered. “We both know whose fault it is we need to go to a fertility clinic in the first place.”

“Hey,” Oliver said gently, nuzzling the top of his wife’s head until she angled her head back to look at him. “Don’t.”

Felicity lowered her gaze for a moment, scrutinizing his chest. Her fingertips moved over the moles on the right side of his chest. They were the only unevenness there and Felicity loved to touch it, saying she liked the feeling of these moles under her fingertips. It was the little kitsch she allowed herself to say when usually she just rolled her eyes at statements like that.

“Tomorrow might actually be the day that we start making our baby,” Felicity whispered, looking at him. “We might actually make a baby.”

Oliver smiled, relieved that Felicity wasn’t drowning herself in her guilt over their situation. Nobody was to blame for their situation, and it certainly wasn’t her fault.

“We might actually make a baby,” Oliver repeated her words.

He rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes. His arms tightened around her waist. Holding her close like this felt good. There was no better start into his day than this. He couldn’t even imagine how much joy he would feel when it was Felicity and their child that he was going to hold in his arms.

“Do you think it will work this time?” Felicity asked, her voice even quieter than before. “It’s our third try and Dr. Perez said that if it doesn’t work this time-“

“Hey,” Oliver interrupted her and pecked her lips. “I am hopeful. There is enough time to worry and to think about the next steps when it doesn’t work out. For now, we should both be hopeful.”

Felicity took in a deep breath. A smile was spreading on her lips before she breathed out slowly. Eventually, she nodded. “Then I am going to be hopeful, too.”

“Yeah?” Oliver asked, his smile widening.

“Yeah,” Felicity replied.

Oliver angled his head and kissed Felicity’s lips once more. Just when he was about to open his lips and deepen the kiss, Felicity’s alarm went off, though. They both groaned as their lips parted.

“I guess you cannot stay in bed for five minutes longer?” Oliver asked.

“Any other day,” Felicity replied and pecked his lips, “but not today.”

Groaning, Oliver rolled onto his back, loosening his hold on Felicity enough for her to be free to leave. Felicity kissed his cheek shortly before she rolled away and grabbed the shirt she had taken off his body last night and put it on. Oliver watched her, smiling softly. She was going to head straight under the shower anyway, so she shouldn’t have needed to put on clothes. Even after years of marriage, she still did that most of the times, though. It was almost amusing.

When Felicity got up from the edge of the bed and headed to the bathroom, Oliver sat up in bed with a sigh. He pushed the blanket away and scooted over to the edge of the mattress, looking around for something to wear.

“Are you heading out for a run?” Felicity asked, leaning into the frame of the door between their bedroom and the bathroom.

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“In case you run into your dad, it’s his birthday,” Felicity reminded him.

Oliver chuckled. “I didn’t forget. Don’t worry.”

“Oh, and Tommy is going to pick you up to head to Verdant earlier than usually today because you have that appointment with the head of the security of the club and-”

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her gently, smiling even more. “I know.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. “I really need a baby to baby, so I can stop babying you.”

Again, Oliver chuckled. He got up and walked towards Felicity, smirking when she blushed slightly at his nakedness. Even after almost seven years of being married, she still blushed and Oliver couldn’t love it more than he did. He framed her face and kissed her softly, putting all his love for her into the kiss.

“We are going to have our baby, Felicity Smoak-Queen,” he promised her and pecked her lips once more. “And as long as we will wait for it, you can baby me as much as you want to.”

Felicity smiled at him, putting her hands around his wrists. “Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Oliver replied. He pecked her lips one last time before he turned her around at her shoulders and pushed her into the bathroom. “You get into the shower and make yourself look even more beautiful than you do already. I am going to head out and be back before you have to leave to kiss you goodbye.”

He slapped her butt playfully and Felicity giggled in response. Smirking, Oliver closed the door between them and put on his training clothes for his morning run. With his shoes in his hands, he strolled downstairs and was surprised not to run into anyone. Usually, he would either run into his parents, their maid Raisa or even his sister, who came back home early in the morning from some party or her newest boyfriend.

On the terrace at the back of the mansion, Oliver put on his running shoes and stretched himself some as a warmup. It was a chilly morning, so Oliver put on the hood of his green hoodie jacket and started running, fast and with large steps as he always did.

While Oliver was running through the neighborhood he once again noticed the many signs that revealed how many of the houses here were for sale. He had noticed those signs more and more often lately. A lot of people seemed to be planning on moving away and were selling their houses. Apparently, there weren’t a lot of families he had grown up with that could still afford a lifestyle like this, with a home about the size of a castle. The financial crisis had damaged a lot of families’ wealth.

The slight feeing of nostalgia, knowing that so many families he had known all his life were moving away now, mixed with a completely different feeling, though. He knew that a lot of the houses were sold to younger families, who were moving to Starling to start their families. That had gotten Oliver thinking.

He liked the idea of his children growing up in his parents’ home. He liked the idea of having them spoilt by Raisa like he had been spoilt by her when he had been younger, still was sometimes now. He liked the idea of having his parents around for them to build a great relationship with the kids.

On the other hand, having a home that was just Felicity’s and his where they would eventually raise their children without anyone butting into their decisions was something he liked a lot, too. Their kids wouldn’t grow up in his parents’ home, but they would at least grow up in the neighborhood, the one he had grown up and spent all his life in. He couldn’t imagine his children growing up anywhere else than here, getting to know the same carefree childhood that didn’t lack anything money could or couldn’t buy.

Oliver decided to keep this thought in the back of his mind. With his father’s birthday today, the appointment in the fertility clinic tomorrow and the opening of the club at the weekend, there were more important things for Felicity and him to focus on. Deciding on whether they were supposed to buy a house soon would have to wait a little while longer.

For the rest of his run, Oliver pushed all thoughts of the future and whatever away to just focus on his movements and his breathing instead. Running just cleared his head like barely anything else could, at least if he focused on running itself and nothing else.

When Oliver arrived back at the terrace behind his home forty-five minutes after starting his run, he wiped some of the sweat off his face with the sleeves of his hoodie jacket and headed right inside. He knew he would have to skip breakfast to be ready in time for when Tommy was going to pick him up. He didn’t mind, though. He’d put a good run over breakfast any time. Well, almost any time, Oliver corrected himself with a smile when he saw Felicity coming down the stairs. He’d happily skip every morning run to have breakfast in bed with her.

Oliver waited at the bottom of the stairs, watching her coming closer. She was focused on something on her tablet, so she didn’t notice him. It never failed to make Oliver smile how sucked up into work she could get. It was like the world around her faded away when she was working and Oliver loved watching her when that happened.

She didn’t notice him until she almost bumped into him. With a quiet gasp for breath that quickly turned into a chuckle, she took a step back and lowered her tablet.

“Hey,” she said, putting her hand to her heart. “I didn’t see you.”

“Oh, I noticed,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “Heading out for work?”

Felicity nodded, waving with the tablet in her hand. “Work is already calling for me.”

“Did you have breakfast?” Oliver asked.

“No time,” Felicity answered, “but I promise I will have decent lunch.”

“Alright.” Oliver nodded. “When are you coming back home?”

“I try to be back before four, so there is enough time to maybe relax for a little before I I have to shower and get ready for Robert’s party, but it might get a little later.”

Again, Oliver nodded. “See you later then.”

“See you later,” Felicity replied. She intended to walk past him, but Oliver quickly took a step to the side to block her way. Felicity chuckled, cocking her head at him. “What?”

Oliver puckered his lips and tapped his forefinger against them. “I want to be kissed goodbye.”

Felicity chuckled. “No way. You are sweaty and I have quite the important meetings today. I am sure the board is not going to be pleased if I smell of your sweat.”

Oliver wiggled with his eyebrows. “Who knows what they think how it got there.”

“You are impossible,” Felicity told him with a chuckle, shaking her head. Then she bit down on her bottom lip and scrutinized Oliver’s face thoroughly. Narrowing her eyes at him slightly, she told him eventually, “Hands behind your back, Mister.”

Grinning, Oliver did as she had asked of him. He knew what was about to come, so he puckered his lips, ready to have her kiss him. Felicity rolled her eyes about him, but the expression in them didn’t fail to tell him that she was as amused as he himself was about this. She went down one more step and put her thumb and forefinger to his chin, turning his head to the side. Then she leaned forward, intending to kiss his cheek. Oliver managed to turn his face back right in time to meet her lips with his, though, and Felicity chuckled against his lips in response.

When Oliver was about to put his arms around her waist and pull her closer, she quickly pulled away from him. She hurried down the last two steps and turned back around to him, walking backwards a couple of steps more to avoid being too close. They both grinned at each other happily.

“No smooching as long as you are sweaty,” Felicity told him.

Oliver was about to reply, making sure she knew that he was going to pout the rest of the day, when--

_Smiling, Felicity stepped in front of him and put her arms around his neck._

_“I’m sweaty,” he said._

_“I know. It’s amazing,” she replied, pressing her lips to his in a loving kiss._

It was just a moment, lasting barely longer than a couple of seconds. Then it was over. He was back in the front room of the mansion instead of whatever place outside they had been when that scene had been playing in front of his eyes. Felicity was still standing a few feet away, her head cocked at him.

“Daydreaming?” she asked him.

Oliver chuckled. “Yes. It seems like it, only about you of course.”

“Of course,” Felicity replied. “Who else would you be daydreaming about?”

They smiled at each other for a long moment and Oliver was tempted to cross the distance and pull Felicity in for another kiss, no matter how much she would try to object. He scrapped the plan as soon as his parents joined them from the dining room. though.

“Ah, there you are,” Robert said to Felicity, smiling at her. “I was already wondering if I had to go to work alone today. I have been terribly spoilt by your company in the limousine the past years and would only refrain myself from it reluctantly now, especially given it’s only a couple more months until I retire.”

“I would never leave you alone, especially not on your birthday,” Felicity told Robert and turned towards him. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed his cheek before she put her arms around his neck and hugged him. “Happy birthday, Dad.”

Robert smiled, putting his arms around Felicity’s waist and hugging her back for a moment. “Thank you, Felicity.”

“And the last word about your retirement isn’t spoken yet,” Felicity whispered into his ear before kissing his cheek once more and pulling out of the hug.

“Happy birthday, Dad,” Oliver congratulated his father and held out a hand for him with a chuckle. “I’d hug you, but Felicity already told me I wouldn’t get close to her as long as she is sweaty and I think that is all the rejection I can take today.”

Robert, Moira and Felicity all chuckled. While Robert put his hand into Oliver’s and shook it with a grateful smile, Felicity linked her arms with Moira’s and leaned towards her, saying loudly enough for Oliver to hear, “Poor guy, he experiences so little love.”

Oliver shot her a mocking look and Felicity winked at him in response, making him smile.

“I hope you will be back in time for the little party tonight?” his dad asked him. When Oliver perked up his eyebrows, he added, “I just mean that I know how much work Tommy and you have put into the club and you are in the middle of the final spurt before the opening, but I hope you manage to make it in time nonetheless to celebrate your old man’s birthday.”

“Of course I will be in time,” Oliver assured his dad.

“I will make sure of that,” Tommy added as he stepped into front room, a wide smile on his lips. “We will be perfect in time for the party.”

“Tommy, you are early,” Oliver said, shooting a look at his watch. “I am not even dressed yet or showered for that matter.”

“I came even earlier than planned,” Tommy admitted, “in hope to meet the birthday boy before he headed out for work.”

“Oh, birthday boy,” Robert chuckled. “I haven’t been called a boy in quite some time.”

Tommy wished Robert a happy birthday with a shake of his hand that almost felt weird for Oliver. Tommy had spent so much time here in the mansion, almost growing up here as his mother had gotten sick and died when they had still been little boys and his dad had been unable or unwilling to take care of him. Tommy was much more than a friend. He was family to Oliver as well as his parents, Thea and Felicity.

When Tommy turned to Felicity, his smile turned into a wide smirk. “Mrs. Smoak-Queen, what does your beauty do to my body?”

“Hey,” Oliver complained mildly, hitting the back of his friend’s head. “That’s my wife you are talking to. Behave.”

He knew how much Tommy loved to tease him by pretending to be flirting with Felicity. It had been a thing from the first day Tommy and Felicity had met, probably because his friend had just been too amused that Oliver, despite any of his promises, had fallen head over heels in love with a girl. Tommy loved to celebrate Felicity as a heroine for turning him into a man who wanted to get married and have kids and settle down for all the things Oliver had used to say he would never want in life. It was a little ridiculous, but it was kind of fun nonetheless.

“Well, you should be careful what you say, Tommy,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, “because I am sure there isn’t much of your body left when I tell Laurel what you said to me. I don’t think she signed up for an open marriage.”

Again, everyone chuckled.

“Speaking of Laurel,” Tommy said, his tone more serious now to mark the end of the teasing around and the start of the business, “she wanted to know if you’re coming over to the club this afternoon to see the result.”

“I can’t,” Felicity replied. “Busy schedule today.”

“Same for Laurel,” Tommy told her, nodding his head. “Good, then we will just talk about when we get to show the queen of our hearts what we have been working on the past months.”

“Sounds great. We talk about the best timing at the party tonight,” Felicity suggested, “because speaking of my busy schedule, we really need to head out now.”

Robert nodded. “Yes, absolutely.”

While his dad leaned down to peck his mom’s lips, Felicity blew Oliver a kiss over her shoulder. He smiled, pretending to catch the kiss midair and hold it to his heart. When it elicited a wide smile from Felicity, he winked at her.

“I will head under the shower and be ready in ten minutes,” Oliver told Tommy as soon as his dad and Felicity were out of the door. He shot a look at his watch. “Thea should be back by then. She wanted to join us.”

“I guess she is spend the night at her boyfriend’s?” Tommy asked.

Moira nodded. “Indeed.”

“You are not happy with her choice?”

“Surprised would be more fitting,” Moira told Tommy, “but she is happy and that is all that really matters.”

“Oh, I will hurt him if he doesn’t make her happy anymore,” Tommy explained. “Thea is like a little sister to me after all.”

Moira smiled. “That is nice to know.”

“I will head upstairs,” Oliver said once more.

“Don’t hurry,” Tommy told him. “Another reason I came earlier is that our fridge is empty and I remembered Raisa’s wonderful pancakes and wondered if I could invite myself over for breakfast.”

Moira chuckled, linking her arm with Tommy’s. “You are always welcome at any time and any meal of the day.”

Oliver watched the two of them heading to the dining room and smiled, shaking his head. The day hadn’t even started yet and he felt it was already going crazy, but what was life without some craziness?

Oliver hurried with the shower, skipping the usual moment of relaxing when he would just let the water hail down on him. He put on some clothes and came back downstairs right when Thea entered the front room, so they got Tommy and together they headed to the club.

“I still can’t believe you bought a club in the Glades of all places,” Thea said, crossing her arms in front of her chest, when they stood in front of the building, taking it in scrutinizing. “Are you even sure people will come here? I mean I would be afraid of my car being stolen to be honest.”

“That is what we have security for,” Oliver told her. “Besides, the location is not that bad. It’s not like we are in the hot spot of the neighborhood.”

“Exactly,” Tommy agreed, nodding his head, “and given that we could buy the building from Queen Consolidated, it didn’t bring complete financial ruin on us before we could even start.”

Thea puckered her lips, nodding slowly. She had been part of the process of building up this club in the last few months. She had come here whenever studying at the fashion school she attended allowed it and constantly questioning their decisions. One could think that she was just trying to annoy them like when she had been younger and she had followed them wherever they had went, but Oliver knew better. Doubting their decisions was her way of making sure they considered them even more carefully and Oliver couldn’t be more grateful for his little sister.

“Now that the opening is only a couple of days away, are you two going to tell me the name of your club?” Thea asked, taking a step forward and looking at Oliver and Tommy with slightly narrowed eyes. “You two have made a big secret of the name.”

Oliver exchanged a short look with Tommy, who nodded his consent about telling Thea. So far only Laurel and Felicity were in on the name. Everyone else, even the rest of their families, had been left in the dark about it.

“The name of the club is,” Oliver started, making a meaningful pause, “Verdant.”

Thea perked up her eyebrows. “Verdant?”

“Verdant,” Tommy confirmed with a nod of his head. When Thea screw up her face, he added, “And trust me, it’s much better than the alternatives your brother offered. Between Green Arrow and Vertigo, it really was the best alternative.”

“Okay then,” Thea said, still not really convinced of the name, “in that case…”

Oliver cocked his head, watching his sister, who smiled encouragingly. She looked like she was biting back a comment on the name, but he ignored it. As long as Thea didn’t say it out loud, he guessed there was no reason for asking her. If she really hated is as much as the expression on her face might suggest, she’d say it. The fact that she didn’t say it meant that she would grow used to it eventually. It would just take time.

The three of them examined the rest of the club. Tommy and Oliver showed Thea all the work they had put into their project. They had told her a lot of their plans and already showed them some, but the last two weeks there had brought a lot of process and had implemented a lot of the details they had planned.

Oliver was glad that Thea had decided to let them show the club. It really was like a dry run for showing Laurel and Felicity. Oliver did feel the intense need to have Felicity saying that she liked what he and Tommy had set up here and he knew it was the same for Tommy with Laurel.

“Okay, I suggest you go downstairs to check the beverage storage. Thea and I will check the kitchen,” Tommy said.

“Alright,” Oliver replied, nodding his head.

“I will send the head of the security downstairs to you when he comes here,” Tommy added when Oliver was already heading towards the stairs. “You hired him, so you talk to him.”

“Sure,” Oliver answered, giving his friend and partner a short thumbs-up.

Oliver headed to the back of the club and hit in the code for the door to the basement. As soon as the light turned green, telling him the door was unlocked, he opened the door and hurried inside. The sound of his shoes meeting the metal stairs echoed through the dark room. Once he had reached the foot of the stairs, Oliver reached out his hands and blindly searched for the light switch. He made a mental note to remember installing another light, so their employees wouldn’t fall down the stairs when hurrying down here in the middle of the night to get some bottles of whatever. He actually wondered why there weren’t a light installed already. He could have sworn that it had been planned.

When he finally managed to find the switch and switched on the light, Oliver grabbed the clipboard from the table nearby and checked if they had really gotten the supply they had ordered. He trusted the people he and Tommy had hired, but the opening of the club had to be perfect. They couldn’t allow themselves to make any huge mistakes and lacking some drinks was probably one of the worst things that could happen to them. Oliver actually had nightmares about that which was why the motto until the opening was trust, but verify.

He had just checked that all the beverage they had ordered had really been delivered when he heard the door upstairs being opened and someone coming down the metal stairs. Putting the clipboard away, Oliver went back to the front of the room and saw the head of security he had hired a few weeks ago coming downstairs.

“Mr. Queen.”

Oliver took the hand the man held out for him, replying, “Mr. Diggle.”

“You can just call me Diggle. Dig if you want.”

For a split second everything went black in front of his eyes then--

_He watched Dig squeezing his eyes shut and opening again several times while he was slowly regaining consciousness. He rolled onto his side, sweat dropping from his forehead. Oliver got up, not getting closer._

_“Hey.”_

_“Oliver?” Dig asked, sitting up at the edge of the med table and frowning at him. “You’re that vigilante.”_

_Oliver told himself to stay calm though his muscles were growing incredibly tense. He knew it was a risk to reveal himself, but he couldn’t have let the other man die. He would have to believe that he wasn’t wrong about his bodyguard and wouldn’t come to regret this. If that turned out wrong, he would have to decide what to do with him._

_He nodded in response and immediately Dig lunged out to hit him. Oliver ducked away under Dig’s arm easily, taking a step forward. He turned around slowly, watching the other man bumping into the table with the computer. Maybe, if he hadn’t been drugged, it would have been a fair fight, but with the Curare still effecting his body, Dig was far in the disadvantage._

_“Easy, Dig,” he told him calmly. “You were poisoned.”_

_“Son of a bitch!” he replied and tried to attack him once more._

_He went for Oliver’s chest rather than his head this time and Oliver held him in a firm grip to keep him from mostly hurting himself. He carefully turned him around until he was leaning back against the med table again. Then Oliver took some steps back, giving Dig room._

_“I could have taken you anywhere, could have taken you home,” he explained then. “I brought you here.”_

_“You really did lose your mind on that island,” Dig replied, shaking his head incredulously._

_“Found a couple things along the way.”_

_“Like what, archery classes?”_

_“Clarity,” Oliver replied, not letting Dig’s word make him lose control. “Starling City is dying. It is being poisoned by a criminal elite who don’t care who they hurt, as long as they maintain their wealth and power.”_

_“What are you gonna do, take ‘em all down by your lonesome?”_

_“No,” Oliver replied shaking his head. He was almost surprised he was saying it. He had been planning on doing this all by himself for a long time. He hadn’t wanted to brought anyone else in. “Now, I want you to join me.”_

Again, everything went black for a moment before--

_Felicity smiled shyly, rubbing her hands together. “Your system looked like it was from the eighties, and not the good part of the eighties, like Madonna and, well, legwarmers.”_

_Oliver didn’t smile though he did think her ramble was wonderfully amusing. “Does that mean you’re in?”_

_“You mean in as in I’m going to join your crusade?”_

Once more the scene changed.

_“Does this group have a name?” Roy asked, looking back and forth between Oliver, John and Felicity. “Like Team Arrow, or something?”_

_“We don’t call ourselves that,” Oliver told him._

_“I do,” Felicity replied lightly, “occasionally.”_

_Oliver gave her a look. “Stop.”_

“Mr. Queen?”

Oliver almost flinched at Dig’s voice. He quickly sucked in a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment. Only when he opened them again, he realized that the place he had seen in his daydreams or whatever to call them, was the same basement where he was now. There had been no beverages, though. Instead it had been a dark place, furnished sparsely. He had no idea what he had been talking about with Dig, Felicity and Roy there, never mind how the three of them were supposed to know each other. Maybe they had run into each other since Roy was Thea’s boyfriend and was working for them as a barkeeper and-

Oliver quickly shook his head, taking in another deep breath before he lifted his gaze to look at Dig. The man took him in worriedly.

“Sorry,” Oliver hurried to say, putting on a smile. “I think the stress of the last weeks is starting to catch up on me.”

“No problem, boss,” Dig replied, nodding shortly. “I will go and check the security system upstairs.”

“Sure,” Oliver answered. “If there is anything wrong, just call Queen Consolidated. The number is upstairs. My wife was responsible for the security system. Just say you are from Verdant and I am sure they will put you straight through to her.”

Dig nodded. “Alright.”

When Dig had left the basement, leaving Oliver alone, he sat down at the bottommost step. Frowning, he looked around. Part of him was still shaking from whatever had happened before when Dig had come down here. It was almost like a memory only that Oliver had no memory that something like that had ever happened.

Besides, it was crazy. What island had Dig talked about? What crusade had Felicity mentioned and what team had Roy referred to? And Oliver saving the city? Sure, there was a high crime rate, at least here in the Glades, but the city was not as terrible as he had made it sound.

Yet Oliver could still feel the determination that had motivated him when talking to Dig, Felicity and Roy. He had been as determined as he had been in the last couple of months that he had set up this club.

Oliver didn’t know how long he had been sitting in the basement and just thought about those dreams when the door upstairs opened once more. He turned his head back over his shoulder and smiled when he saw Thea coming downstairs. She frowned, seeing him sitting at the foot of the stairs.

“Hey,” she said quietly, approaching him and sitting down next to him. “Something wrong or are you just enjoying a moment of pause?”

“I was just thinking that this place would be a good location for a criminal or a superhero to hide,” Oliver replied.

When Thea frowned at him, he chuckled and shook his head. He knew he didn’t make any sense and admittedly he wouldn’t be surprised if his sister thought he was losing his mind. Thea just cocked her head at him, though.

“Did Felicity make you watch The Avengers again?”

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head. He rubbed his hands over his face, shaking his head.

“Sorry, I think I have just been working too much lately,” he told her with a sigh.

The more he said it, the less he felt it was true. Yes, he had been working a lot, but why would that explain those daydreams? Oliver pushed the thought away. He didn’t want to think about it anymore right now.

“Well, aside from the club, I guess you had to pull some nightshifts to work on my little nephew or niece,” Thea teased him, grinning amusedly.

Oliver was about to reply when he figured that the best reply was probably not saying anything at all. He took in another deep breath and nodded to the door upstairs.

“Come on,” he suggested. “Everything is checked down here.”

* * * * *

Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, Oliver watched Felicity doing her makeup. She was focused on making sure the mascara wouldn’t get into her eyes and hence stood so close to the mirror that her nose almost bumped against the cold glass.

It never failed to surprise Oliver how much energy and strength Felicity had. He knew she had spent most of the day in meetings to convince the board of giving their consent for the project she had been planning for months now. Felicity wanted to expand the company into the medical field. Right now, she was working on some bio-transplant that was supposed to help people regain feeling in their limbs again after being paralyzed due to damaged nerve cords. Well, at least that was what he understood from Felicity’s words that he had listen to closely but not quite understood.

It didn’t matter what exactly Felicity was doing, though. He knew he wouldn’t understand all the details of her work since she was like a thousand times smarter than him and computers as well as technology in general just wasn’t something he knew much about. What mattered to Oliver was that Felicity was using her knowledge and the power of the family company to help people and make their lives better. She was trying to be a beacon of hope. Oliver doubted that he could be any prouder of her. Felicity was doing good, making this world a better place.

For the first time Oliver felt almost a stitch of jealousy at the thought. Felicity was doing so much good and all he did was opening a club for the rich and famous and he did so in a neighborhood where people were suffering from being poor.

He knew it was these weird daydreams he had had earlier today that had gotten him thinking. He also knew that it was stupid thinking that way. Oliver didn’t have any skills he could utilize to make this city, never mind the whole world, a better place. He didn’t know anything about technology like Felicity or about archery as Dig had told him in that daydream. God, even if he knew anything about archery, he still had no idea how that would help him.

That daydream had shaken him. Oliver didn’t understand why or how exactly it had happened, but it had shaking him nonetheless.

With a low sigh, Oliver got up from the rim of the bathtub and stepped behind Felicity. He put his arms around her waist and pressed his chest against her back, keeping her against him tightly. Their eyes met in the mirror for a moment before Oliver ducked his head and kissed the side of her neck gently. He nuzzled her neck with his nose, breathing her in. He felt Felicity lean against him with a sigh and put her hands to forearms over her stomach and it made him smile against her skin.

“You alright?” Felicity asked him. “You have been quiet, unusually quiet even for you.”

“I am thinking,” Oliver told her.

“About what?”

“About how much I love you and how you are the only thing I really need in my life to be happy,” he replied. “You are all I really need. Everything else is just bonus.”

He brushed his lips against the side of her neck once more, seeking out her pulse point. He closed his lips around the spot, sucking slightly. When Felicity tensed, instead of leaning more against him and releasing that content hum she always did when he caressed that spot, Oliver lifted his head from her neck and looked at her in the mirror. Felicity’s eyes were focused on him, taking him in scrutinizing. Her lips were pressed together, her eyebrows knitted.

“What?” he asked, surprised by her defensive reaction about his declaration of love.

“You don’t think we are going to have a baby.

Oliver didn’t miss the hurt and betrayal that was audible in her voice and visible in the expression of her eyes. It made a lump form in his throat and a tightening feeling spreading in his stomach and chest. It took him a moment before he felt able to speak, but even then, all he got us were incoherent sentence-fragments.

“I don’t… I just… I just wanted to say… that… that I…”

“You just wanted to tell me that I am all you need because you think I am all you will get,” Felicity replied, almost spitting the words out. “No baby, just me.”

The pure pain in her eyes at thinking that he didn’t believe they would have a baby one day hurt Oliver deep in his heart. After months of trying for a baby without success and then timing sex for better chances for another couple of months, followed by three failed tries of IUI, both their nerves were kind of raw. They had been so hopeful when they had decided to start working on a baby, but the more time had passed without anything happening, the more nerve-wrecking it had become.

They were still hopeful most of the times, though, at least he had done his best to show Felicity that he was hopeful instead of making things worse by mentioning that he was worried. There was still time and there were still a lot of possibilities to try for them. They weren’t at the end of their possibilities and Oliver refused to believe that they weren’t going to have a baby unless they had tried everything in the world or were too exhausted to try any more. That being said, he did feel like they shouldn’t lose themselves in false hopes and be bling for the risk there was that maybe it wouldn’t work out at the end.

“No, honey, please listen to me,” Oliver asked Felicity, finally finding his voice again. He turned her around to look at her directly and cupped her face with his hands gently. “I just… I had a weird… daydream… today. It’s hard to explain, but somehow it got me thinking about what I am doing in this world and if I am doing anything that will leave an impact on it. Then I figured that I envied you a little for leaving your mark on this world, while I am just opening a club. Then I was looking at you before and figured that I didn’t need to leave my mark on this world. Fame doesn’t mean anything to me, but you mean the world to me.”

Oliver smiled, letting the truth of these words wash over him. He stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones and enjoyed the feeling of holding her like this. Felicity’s eyes hardened, though. She put her hands around his wrists and pushed his hands away from her face.

“I know when we got married, I told you that I am glad that you are such a bad liar,” Felicity told him, her voice unusually cold, “but for once I really wished you’d be better at it.”

She turned around on the balls of her feet and left the bathroom with large steps. Oliver doubted that he had ever seen her so angry before. He took Oliver a moment before he could shake himself out of the frozen state her words had left him in and could follow Felicity into the bedroom. She had taken off the dressing gown she had worn over her dress to prevent makeup from smearing onto the fabric and was putting on her high heels.

“Felicity, I’m sorry,” he told her, “but what I said is true. I do believe that we will-“

“You should get dressed. The first guests are surely going to arrive soon and it would be quite weird if you were the last to join the party given that you are living here.”

Felicity shot him a short look, one that didn’t allow any objection, so Oliver just nodded. Without another word, Felicity turned around and walked away from him.

_His heart eased immediately, seeing Felicity sitting on a bench in the small Starling City Park. He couldn’t see her face, but the way she just sat there, made him feel more confident in the hope that she really was okay. He took some deep breaths before he approached her slowly._

_“Didn’t I once tell you that ‘I need some air’ really means ‘I don’t want to talk right now’?” she asked without turning around to look at him, instead keeping her eyes at some random point in the distance. Her hands were formed to fists in the pockets of her coat._

_“I am sorry,” he said quietly, sitting down next to her. He tried to make out what exactly she was looking at, but didn’t find anything that could be that interesting. So he turned his head towards her, looking at her softly. “I am sorry for forgetting the detergent and for having inspired Emmy to play detective. I didn’t know that that would end in more work for you. I wouldn’t have told her if I had known. I know that with all the pregnancy hormones it’s not easy for you, and I didn’t want to make it worse.”_

_There was no sign that Felicity was listening to him, but at least she didn’t snap. So Oliver kept talking with his soft, calming voice._

_“I dropped Emmy at Thea’s place. She is going to stay there for the night. So how about we go home, and I will take care of you tonight? You will get the full relaxation program. We will order Pizza or whatever you want. We also have a box of ice cream for dessert in the freezer. I can give you a massage and you can take a bath, reading a book. Or we will watch your favorite movies. We will do whatever you want to chase the effect of the hormones away.”_

_He smiled softly and reached out to pull one of her hands out of the pockets of her coat. The moment his skin made contact with hers, she pulled her hand away, though. Her head snapped around, so she was looking at him now. Her piercing blue eyes sparkled angrily, and Oliver’s heart sank._

_“God, could you just – for the love of God! – let me breathe? For once?” she yelled, bringing more distance between the two of them. “Can’t you just – for once – leave me alone? You are everywhere! Always! You are hovering over me like some creepy stalker! Even when I say I want to be alone, you come after me!”_

_She got up from the bench and stamped away. Oliver watched her, eyes widened. He could think about a thousand things to say like “I am not as much of a stalker as a certain ex-boyfriend of yours” and “I was just worried because I didn’t know where you were”, but he kept his mouth shut, knowing that none of this would help Felicity to calm down and especially the first statement would make her even angrier. Of course it would. His occasional, irrational jealousy of Palmer was something Felicity always rolled her eyes about._

_When Felicity suddenly stood still and turned around to come back to him, still looking angry, his eyebrows perked. He had to bite his tongue to force that quiet voice inside of himself that still thought she was the cutest person in the world to remain silent. Telling Felicity that she looked as cute as a cupcake right now would, although it was true, most likely get him killed._

_He couldn’t help it. Even when she was angry at him for nothing, he still loved her with all his heart._

_“Oh, and by the way,” she added when she returned, “I should be allowed to have a bad day. You are in broody mood for weeks and I am saying nothing! You could at least try to not blame it on the hormones, you know?! Just because I am usually the one with the good mood, doesn’t have to mean that I have to be that abnormally happy all the time!”_

_She glared at him for a moment longer before she turned around again, stomping away in the same direction as she had before. She didn’t turn back around to him this time, and Oliver just sat unmoving while watching her leave._

The daydream or whatever to call it – he still had trouble calling it a dream because it didn’t feel like that at all – had come without preparation. One second Felicity had disappeared out of his sight here in the mansion, leaving him with a heavy heart, the next he had felt the tight feeling in his chest lifting at seeing her sitting in the Starling City Park, only for her to leave him again.

Oliver sat down on the edge of the bed, rubbing his hands over her face once more. These daydreams that weren’t dreams or memories he didn’t recognize were starting to annoy him more and more. They also felt increasingly weird to him.

He had talked about dropping Emmy at Thea’s place. Who was Emmy and why would he drop her at Thea’s place when he and Thea were living together here in the mansion? Who was this Palmer-guy and had he really stalked Felicity? The name rang a bell for Oliver, but he couldn’t remember where he had heard it. Why had Felicity been angry with him? Had he been clingy? From what she had said, it had sounded a lot like it. Yet being clingy didn’t sound like him.

So many questions, so little answers.

Oliver got up from the bed and strolled back into the bathroom. He splashed some cold water into his face, feeling it helping with the dizzy feeling in his head. When he lifted his gaze and looked into the mirror, water was running down his face and dropping from his chin and jaw. His eyes were unfocussed like he was about to pass out, but it didn’t exactly feel like that.

He needed to focus. He needed to get himself back in control. Whatever had been going on with him today, definitely needed to stop. Otherwise he would go insane. Most importantly, though, Oliver needed to make up with Felicity. He hated when they were fighting.

As quickly as possible, Oliver changed into his tuxedo and made his way downstairs. There were a couple of guests already, but knowing his parents and their tendency to invite all their distant friends and business partners to these kind of parties, Oliver guessed there were a lot more still to come. Rejecting the offer of a glass champagne, Oliver looked around the room, trying to find Felicity.

It took her a while until she found her standing with a tall, dark-haired guy Oliver distantly remembered from some other party. He was some business partner if he remembered correctly. A guy named--

_Stepping out of the elevator, Oliver took in a deep breath. He knew he would need all his courage to tell Felicity what he had to say. He had pushed her away for so long and hurt her so deeply that he was more nervous about telling her what he had to tell her now than he had been when asking her out. He would have to hope that she was able to forgive him._

_He crossed the hall in front of her office with large steps, smiling slightly at the memories of the old times when she had still been his assistant. Looking back, their banter had always been a lot of fun. Admittedly, it had been a mistake to make Felicity his assistant, though. She had deserved more than that. It had been easier for him that way, but unfair to her. He knew that._

_Oliver took in another breath before he turned around to step into Felicity’s office, a nervous but excited smile on his lips. The smile fell the moment he saw Felicity in the arms of Ray Palmer, kissing him._

_Feeling his chest and throat tightening, Oliver lowered his gaze. He had no right to be hurt. He had told Felicity again and again that being the Arrow made it impossible for him to be with someone he cared about. He had kissed her and let her walk away. She had the right to find someone who didn’t need a crazy stalker to drop dead bodies all over the cities to decide that she wanted someone in her life nonetheless._

_Not daring to look up and see the two of them once more, Oliver turned around and quickly walked away._

Oliver felt his breath getting caught in his throat as he watched Felicity and Ray Palmer chatting lightly now. He grabbed a glass of champagne from the tray of a waiter that walked past him and downed it quickly. Either he was insane already or these weird flashes to inexistent moments would make him go insane soon.

“Oliver?”

Almost grateful for the distraction, even if still slightly shaken, Oliver turned around to his father. He put the empty glass away and smiled at his old man, spreading his arms for him.

“Dad,” he said and hugged his father, “now here’s the real happy birthday I couldn’t give you this morning.”

Robert chuckled, clapping his son’s back. “Thank you so much.”

Still in his father’s arms, Oliver took in a deep breath to gather himself. Then he let go of his dad and took a step back, smiling.

“How did the work at Verdant go?” Robert asked him.

“Great,” Oliver replied, doing his best to push away the memory of what had happened when Dig had joined him in the basement of the club. “There are a few details we need to take care of, but the opening can come. We are ready.”

“That’s great,” Robert said, smiling at his son. He put his hand on his shoulder and added, “The last months have been a little crazy, so I might have not gotten around saying it, but I didn’t want to miss out on the chance now. I am really proud of you, of the man you made of yourself.”

Oliver smiled and lowered his gaze, weirdly touched by his father’s words. It hadn’t always been like this between them. He had been quite the rebellious teenager and he was sure it had driven his father insane more than once. He was glad they had a so much better relationship now.

Shooting a short look towards Felicity, who was still talking to Ray Palmer, Oliver pressed his lips together. Then he told his dad, “You know, lately I am wondering if maybe I could do more for this city, do my own charity project in our foundation maybe.”

Robert puckered his lips, nodding. “Sure, if you would like to. You can do everything you want, Oliver.”

Oliver smiled. “So you think this is good idea?”

“I think-“

“I am sorry to interrupt,” Moira said, appearing at her husband’s side and holding onto his arm, “but, Oliver, would you mind if I stole him away for a dance.”

Oliver chuckled. “Of course not, mom.”

“We will talk about this tomorrow or any other day soon,” Robert suggested.

Oliver nodded, and Moira pulled Robert away onto the small dancefloor. Together they swayed in time with the music, her hand resting on his heart. They looked at each other with so much love that Oliver felt the need to look away. The need to see his parents happy which he felt didn’t happen as often as it should be made him look up again, though.

_They did a dance party for their fourth perfect day._

_Emmy danced between her parents happily, giggling when Oliver tried to dance up on her with an especially weird shake of his hips. She stepped onto Oliver’s or Felicity’s feet and danced like that for slow songs, and when Oliver asked for a dance with mommy, she pirouetted around her little brother, making him giggle like crazy._

_When the kids were in bed, Felicity and Oliver switched to slow-dancing completely. She put her head on his shoulder and her arms around his waist. Closing her eyes, she enjoyed the way he wrapped himself around her, warming her whole body._

_“This is nice,” she whispered._

_“Yes, it is.”_

_“All of this has been a great idea.”_

_“I am glad you think that.”_

_“We could relocate this to our bedroom, maybe lose some of our clothes,…” she suggested._

_“Would you be very disappointed if I preferred dancing like this?”_

_“Not disappointed,” Felicity replied, “only surprised. Oliver I-don’t-dance Queen wants to dance instead of having sex?”_

_Oliver chuckled. “See how much I love you?”_

_“See it, feel it, know it. And I love you, too.”_

Oliver felt his heart sinking. The idea of dancing with Felicity while a little girl with blonde, curly hair was dancing around them and a dark-haired baby boy was sitting on the floor, watching them, was exactly how he imagined their future. At least he hoped that it would be what their futured was holding for them.

Despite of what he had told Felicity - that having her was all he needed to be happy - and what he had told his dad – that maybe he wanted to work on some charity project to at least do some good – he still wanted to have a baby more than anything and he did believe that they were going to have one, however or whenever that would happen. He wanted to have a baby as much as Felicity did, and he was hopeful that they would have one.

When Oliver turned around to head to the bar and get himself another drink, he found Felicity walking towards him slowly. There was some hesitation behind the quiet smile on her lips. She caught her bottom lip between her front teeth as she was coming closer and Oliver cocked his head, smiling with relief since it seemed like she was more forgiving now than she had been before.

“In for a dance?” Oliver asked, holding out a hand for her before she could say anything.

Surprise showed on Felicity’s face and Oliver chuckled. He really wasn’t much of a dancer. Usually Felicity had to force him onto the dance floor or threaten him to dance with some other good-looking guy. The little daydream had gotten him into the right mood, though.

“Always,” Felicity replied eventually, putting her smaller hand into his and letting him lead her over to the dance floor.

Oliver kept her hand in his and wrapped his other arm around her waist, holding her close to him. Felicity rested her hand on his shoulder and held onto the back of his upper arm. His kissed the crown of Felicity’s head before he rested his forehead against her temple and closed his eyes, enjoying the intimacy of the moment. Together they swayed in time with the music. It was a slow song, allowing them to just move slightly which Oliver welcomed a lot since he really couldn’t dance.

They didn’t have moments like these often, so Oliver kept Felicity close without saying anything for some time. Between building up the club and taking over the family company, their lives didn’t allow them a lot of time to relax a or a lot of time to spend alone. Maybe that was another reason why getting their own home might be a good idea.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered after some time, “about what I said before…”

Felicity angled her head back a little and shook her head. “Don’t. My nerves are frazzled. We have been trying so long and been disappointed so often that I-“

“I am still hopeful,” Oliver whispered. “I am hopeful and confident that we will have a baby. I don’t know how or when, but we will find a way. We are going to have kids, Felicity. I promise you.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, nodding her head, before she rested her head back against his shoulder once more. Oliver kissed the top of her head, resting his cheek against it.

“I am scared,” Felicity whispered eventually. “I am scared it won’t work and we will continue to be disappointed again and again.”

“I know,” Oliver replied, tightening his arms around her even more. “So am I.”

There was no reason to deny it. Oliver was scared. He just refused to let that fear stop him from trying, at least for now.

Since Felicity didn’t say anything else and Oliver didn’t know what more he was supposed to say, Oliver snuggled his cheek to the top of Felicity’s hair and watched his parents dancing. He knew that they had had quite the tough times in their marriage, too, and they had pulled through. So would he and Felicity. They had a marriage just as strong as the one of his parents and--

_His father pulled the trigger, washing away every exhaustion that had almost lulled him into sleep a second ago._

_“Dad?!”_

_His eyes widened. He scooted back as far as the small life raft allowed it, staring at his father, who still held the gun directed at where Gus had sat seconds ago before he had fallen backwards into the water. He had killed him._

_Oliver didn’t have time to process it, though, because the next moment his dad added, “Survive.”_

_He turned the gun to his head and shot, killing himself._

The scene changed.

_“Choose!” Slade yelled at him, holding the gun to Thea’s head now._

_“I swear to God, I am going to kill you!” Oliver yelled back._

_The panic was making it harder and harder for him to figure out how to get them all out of this situation alive. He needed to find a way. He couldn’t have Thea or his mother die because of something he had done. Slade would never kill him, though. He would see it as an act of mercy that he would feel Oliver didn’t deserve. Maybe Slade was right. Maybe he didn’t deserve it._

_“No,” his mother’s voice suddenly sobbed. She got up on shaking legs, taking in a sniffling breath._

_“Mom,” Oliver almost whispered, terrified by what she was doing. “Mom, what are you doing?”_

_“There is only one way this night can end,” Moira told him, looking at him with tear-filled eyes. Then she turned to Slade. “Both my children will live.”_

_“Mom! What are you doing?!” Thea yelled, panic making her voice break._

_“Thea, I love you,” Moira said. She faced the gun Slade was holding into her face, not looking back at Thea, who was crying out loudly in pain. “Close your eyes, baby.”_

_“No!” Oliver yelled, willing this nightmare to stop, but he couldn’t. He knew there was nothing he could do to stop this._

_“You possess true courage,” Slade told Moira, stepping closer to her. Then put the gun away. “I am truly sorry.”_

_“What?” Moira asked, apparently just as confused about Slade’s actions as Oliver was._

_This was what Slade wanted, a decision who got to die and who got to live. He had wanted Oliver to make the decision like he had unwillingly made the decision to have Sara survive and Shado killed. Oliver told himself that he would have thrown himself in front of Shado if the gun had been held to her head, too, but they would never know it. Maybe he had made the decision after all._

_“You did not pass that on your son,” Slade replied._

_Within the break of a second he pulled a sword from under his coat and put it through Moira’s chest. Oliver felt nausea rising inside of him, his whole world falling apart around him._

_He distantly heard Thea cry out, “No!”_

_His body couldn’t take the pain, couldn’t take the trauma. His legs gave in and his body slumped to the cold ground. He saw his mother falling to the ground, too. Her eyes were still opened, the expression in them empty and lifeless. The sight was already burned into Oliver’s mind forever when everything around him went black._

“Honey?”

Oliver flinched, looking down to find Felicity staring at him worriedly. She was squeezing his hand and rubbing her free fingers over his heart. Oliver was sure that she could feel it racing in his chest, making it hard to breathe or hear anything over the rushing of blood in his ears.

“Oliver your face is almost white,” Felicity said worriedly. “What’s going on?”

“I am just-“ Oliver started, but felt the words getting stuck in his throat.

What had he just seen? His father killing himself and his mother being killed by someone he seemed to know, but had no memory of? Oliver still felt the goosebumps that had spread all over his skin. He suddenly felt unbelievable cold when he had been sweating only seconds ago.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked.

Oliver tightened his arms around Felicity, pulling her back against him completely. He could feel her heart beating against his chest and it calmed him down. Beat by beat, his heart adjusted to her heartbeat until they beat in synch. Oliver was still shaken, but at least it allowed him to breathe again.

He ducked his head and captured Felicity’s lips with his. His tongue opened her mouth to his touch and he stroked his tongue against hers in a deep, loving kiss. Tasting her and feeling her melt against his chest, remembered him of what was important. This was real, whatever he had seen before wasn’t.

When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against Felicity’s and explained, “I think once the club is opened and established, I could need a vacation. I would like to go somewhere where is it just us. I think I need some escape for a while.”

Felicity pulled back slightly, smiling at him. “Just us sounds great to me.”

“Yeah?” Oliver asked.

“Yeah,” Felicity confirmed, her smile widening. “Maybe we could ask your dad if we can borrow the Gambit and-“

“Not the Gambit,” Oliver hurried to say. Felicity perked up her eyebrows in response, and Oliver chuckled nervously, shaking his head. He kissed Felicity’s head. “Not the Gambit.”

“Well, then maybe Bali?” she asked, cocking her head. “I always wanted to go to Bali.”

“Then we will go to Bali.” Oliver smiled, stroking a strand of hair that had fallen into Felicity’s hair out of her face. He kissed her forehead before he suggested, “We could also take a few days to visit your parents and-“

“Oh god, no,” Felicity hurried to say, shaking her head vehemently. “I was lucky I got to snatch away the invitation for the party Roberts wanted to send them.”

Oliver frowned slightly. “Don’t you want to see them again at all?”

“Well, I would love to see my dad,” Felicity replied, “but I just can’t with my mother. I rather relinquish seeing my dad than having to my endure my mom. She’s too much of a prize to pay for seeing my dad.”

_“Come on, what’s going on?” Oliver whispered, rather encouraging than urging her._

_“My dad left all those years ago today,” Felicity whispered back, another sob escaping her lips and she pressed herself closer against him._

_Oliver squeezed his eyes shut. He knew that her dad had left. He knew that because he knew almost everything about her and he definitely knew everything about her that had had such a strong influence on her life like her father leaving had had on her.  
He just hadn’t known that this was the day he had left._

_So he held her more tightly and pressed kisses to every part of her skin he could reach with his lips. Felicity only sighed and closed her eyes, but a small smile was playing on her lips and Oliver felt even more relieved. She was going to be okay._

_Leaning his lips against her ear, he whispered, “Your dad’s a jerk.”_

Something flashed in front of his eyes before the scene changed.

_“Is everything alright?” Oliver asked. “You’ve barely said a word since dinner.”_

_“I’m thinking,” Felicity replied._

_“About your mother moving here?”_

_“Yeah…”_

_Oliver tightened his arms around her and gently kissed her earlobe before he asked, “You’re not looking forwards to that?”_

_“I love my mom. I just-“_

_Felicity took in a deep breath, snuggling closer to Oliver, before breathing out with a sigh. She turned her head, so her nose was pressed against his shoulder and breathed him in. He pressed a reassuring kiss to the back of her head, not saying anything. She knew he didn’t want to urge her to talk if she wasn’t ready yet._

_Sighing, Felicity turned in his arms, so her chest was pressed to his. She moved her hands to his cheeks framing his face. She could only see the outlines of his body in the dark, so she moved her fingertips over his face instead._

_“I’m just scared she and I will start to annoy each other and our relationship will suffer from that,” Felicity whispered. “I don’t want my relationship to my mom to fall apart again. Do you understand that?”_

_“Yeah, of course,” Oliver whispered back. He angled his head, resting his forehead against hers, and tightened his arms around her waist. “I don’t think you need to worry about that, though. Donna and you get along with each other so much better now, and I think it is not only because you barely spend time with each other. The both of you are completely different people now, and you have built a completely new relationship.”_

_“So you think I shouldn’t worry?”_

_“Exactly,” Oliver replied. “Look, you even flew to Vegas to talk to her when you felt you couldn’t talk to me. Years ago you wouldn’t have done that.”_

_Felicity sighed, nuzzling his nose with hers. “You would like to have her here, right?”_

_“Of course I would. We barely have any blood family left. Our children only have that one grandmother. And actually Donna is like a mother to me,” Oliver explained. “So if she starts to annoy you, I am willing to bear all her attention.”_

Oliver shook his head slightly, shaking the thought off.

He hadn’t met Donna Smoak and Noah Kuttler often since Felicity liked to avoid her mother as much as possible. It came with the disadvantage of not being able to see her father as often as she would like to, but like Felicity had just said she rather took a pass on seeing her father than having to meet her mother. Oliver had met his parents-in-law a couple of times, mostly for holidays, but it had always been visits that Felicity had known to keep as short as possible, so she wouldn’t go insane because of her mother. She hated not seeing Noah more often, though. She adored him, always had.

Anyway, Noah Kuttler had never left Felicity and Oliver saw no way that would have ever been possible because Noah loved Felicity and Donna more than anything. Also, Donna Smoak wasn’t like a mother to Oliver. He didn’t know her well enough for that. Yet, Oliver took a daydream like that before any other dream of his parents dying or whatever anytime.

Oliver took in a deep breath. If these daydreams continued like this, he really needed to get some booze to make it through the rest of the evening. It was still early, so there were still hours for his mind to torture him with more daydreams.

“How about we get some drinks?” Oliver suggested to Felicity.

“Well, no alcohol for me, but some ginger ale won’t hurt,” she replied with a smile.

Oliver laced his fingers through hers, kissing the back of her hand, and led her over to the bar. He ordered the ginger ale for her and a whiskey for himself. When he turned back around to Felicity, he saw Tommy coming towards them. Oliver raised his glass, tapping his forefinger against it, and cocked his head. Tommy gave him a thumbs-up, so Oliver ordered another glass for him.

“Handsome tuxedo, Mr. Merlyn,” Felicity said with a smile when Tommy joined them.

Tommy released a strangled sound and pulled at the collar of his dress shirt like it was choking him. “I hate wearing it, but it seems like all the ladies are into it.”

“We can’t do anything against it,” Felicity told him. “We love bow ties and suspenders.”

As if to lend weight to her argument, she snuck her hand under the lapel of Oliver’s jacket and stroked her fingers over the suspender there. She sighed reverently before she winked at Oliver, making him and Tommy chuckle. Oliver kissed her temple and pulled her closer to his side before he looked at Tommy.

“Where is Laurel?”

“Oh, she’s“ - Tommy stopped to take a short look around before he pointed towards the couches in front of the fireplace – “right over there with her parents and Sara.”

Oliver followed his friend’s pointing finger, seeing Laurel indeed standing between her father and her sister. For a moment, Oliver wondered why seeing the three of them together felt weird to him. Before he got the chance to figure it out, though--

_“Do you even know how difficult it is to ping a clone off a hacked transband multiplex?” Felicity asked while they were all heading down the metal stairs into the basement. Oliver shortly wondered if that question was meant seriously._

_“No,” Roy replied, “but only because you weren’t speaking English just now.”_

_Oliver rolled his eyes slightly though he did feel a grin threatening to spread on his lips. Of course Roy didn’t understand. Nobody ever understood Felicity when-_

_His thoughts came to a sudden stop when he turned into the lair and caught sight of the med table. Sara was lying there, still wearing her leather gear. Her skin pale and her body lifeless. Three arrows were sticking out from her chest. There was blood on her chest and face, her empty eyes staring at the ceiling._

_“Sara?” he whispered._

_“I didn’t know where else to take her,” Laurel told him, her voice shaking. She moved her hands together nervously. Oliver couldn’t look away from Sara’s dead body, but he could see the blood on Laurel’s clothes from the corners of his eyes._

_Felicity was walking past him to the med table. Her eyes didn’t hide the shock she was in. She put a hand to Sara’s wrist, almost like she wanted to feel for her pulse, a pulse Oliver knew wasn’t there anymore. Roy followed her, while Oliver was just frozen into place._

_“Oh, my god. Oh, my god!”_

_“What happened?” Roy asked._

_“I couldn’t… I couldn’t leave her,” Laurel replied, giving no further explanation._

_“We have to- call- we can- take her to the hospital!” Felicity finally managed to call out, her voice shaking almost as much as Laurel’s had._

_Finally, Oliver managed to come closer, taking a thorough look at Sara. It only confirmed what he knew already. There was no reason to take her to the hospital. Sara was dead._

Oliver gasped for breath, his arm tightening around Felicity’s waist so much that he was surprised she could still breathe. If his firm hold hurt her, she didn’t make him know. She looked at him worriedly, putting a hand to his cheek.

“Honey, don’t you want to lie down maybe?” she asked.

Oliver blinked, trying to chase the pictures of a dead Sara from his mind. Admittedly, the thought of Sara dying didn’t shake him as much as his parents’ dying, but he figured it was only because at least he had been spared from seeing her dying. He and Sara had been friends for a long time. He, Tommy and Laurel had all been friends since elementary school, so eventually they had gotten to known Laurel’s little sister and eventually become friends with her, too. If she died…

“Everything alright, man?” Tommy asked.

Putting on a smile, Oliver looked at his friend, who stared at him just as worriedly as his wife now. Oliver took Felicity’s hand from his chest quickly and kissed the palm of it.

“I am fine,” Oliver told the two of them, “just a little unfocussed today.”

He kissed Felicity’s temple and pressed her nose against her hair to breathe her in and remind him of what was real once more.

“You’re sure?” Felicity asked. “Your dad would understand if you need to lie down.”

Oliver shook his head and quickly downed the whiskey. “I am fine.”

Felicity shot him a doubting look, but Oliver didn’t say anything more and before Felicity could say anything about it, they were joined by Thea and Laurel, who had their arms linked with each other. Oliver was about to ask them something, not yet sure what he could ask, but needing to distract from talking about how he felt. Luckily, his little sister took that part for him.

“What’s wrong with the two of you?” she asked, looking back between Felicity and Laurel.

The two friends looked at each other with confusion for a moment before they answered in chorus, “Why?”

“Well, what’s with the water and ginger ale?” she asked, pointing at the other women’s drinks. “I mean I get it. You are eventually going to have babies and- no, wait! Don’t tell me you are going to have babies at the same time. That would be ultimate friendship goals and-“

“No,” Felicity hurried to say, shaking her head vehemently. “We are not having a baby.”

Oliver was sure that the pain in her voice wasn’t audible for the others, who didn’t know her that well. He didn’t miss it, though. He spread his fingers against her ribs and kissed her temple. Felicity angled her head back and gave him a reassuring smile, wordlessly telling her that she was alright and Oliver pecked her lips in response.

“Oh my god!” Thea’s high-pitched screech made them pull apart. Several people turned around towards them, so Thea chuckled soothingly. Only when nobody was paying attention to them anymore, did she grab Laurel’s arm. “Really?”

Oliver frowned. He had been so focused on Felicity that he hadn’t paid attention to Thea, Laurel and Tommy which was why he was now clueless about what had gotten his little sister so excited. “What? What’s going on?”

Laurel looked at Tommy, rolling her lips into his mouth. Tommy chuckled, lifting his hands. “Hey, you are the one who didn’t want to tell people. I would have posted it on any social media account we have if you had let me.”

Oliver felt Felicity tense and he could already feel his stomach dropping. He didn’t need them to say it to know what news their friends wanted to share with them that got his sister so excited. He sent a silent prayer to heaven that it was wrong and they weren’t going to say it, but those hopes were soon crushed.

“We are having a baby,” Laurel announced happily, keeping her voice quiet to prevent anyone else from hearing. “Nobody knows yet, but the three of you.”

“Oh my god!” Thea whispered excitedly and hugged Laurel closely. “Congratulations.”

“Thank you,” Laurel replied.

Thea pulled back to hug Tommy then and asked both parents-to-be, “Was this planned.”

“No,” Laurel answered immediately, shaking her head. “We were completely surprised. We actually wanted to wait a little longer and…”

Oliver just stood there, listening to Laurel telling Thea how she and Tommy had planned on waiting a couple of years before considering having a baby, but how life had surprised them with the baby she was carrying now. He was unable to say anything or do anything. A short look at Felicity told him that it wasn’t any different for her. She was staring at their friends with almost dead eyes. Yet a hundred different emotions were running over her face. They were lucky that Thea seemed to be hogging Tommy and Laurel enough to hide their dumbstruck reaction.

Oliver felt the need to comfort Felicity even though he had little to no comfort to give. He moved his hand to the small of her back, rubbing up and down slightly. The movement seemed to release Felicity from her frozen state. He almost expected her to burst out in tears, but instead she put on a wide smile that was so horrifyingly convincing that Oliver secretly wondered how often she had hidden her pain behind a smile.

“Congratulations, guys,” she said, hugging both Laurel and Tommy, and smiled at them widely. “I am so happy for you. You gotta tell me all about this as soon as we get around to. If you just excuse me. I have a headache and need to lie down.”

Before anyone could say anything, Felicity walked past them and hurried towards the stairs. They all looked after her.

“Is she okay?” Tommy asked, looking at Oliver worriedly.

“Did I say something wrong?” Laurel added.

Oliver put on a smile that felt weird on his face. He knew it wasn’t Tommy’s or Laurel’s fault. He and Felicity had never told anyone about their problems with having a baby. They had kept it strictly between them, so Laurel couldn’t have known that her announcement was coming at one of the worst moments possible. Admittedly, as long as Felicity wasn’t pregnant in the second trimester, there probably never would have come a better moment.

“No,” Oliver replied to Laurel. “Felicity had a headache all day. She wanted to push herself through it, but I guess it’s getting a lot for her. I will check if she needs anything. See you later.”

He had already walked past them when he turned back to them once more. He hugged first Laurel and then Tommy, saying, “Congratulations, guys. Such exciting news.”

He was about to say something more, when--

_“Thank you,” Tommy said, choking the words out as his eyes were closing._

_“No, no!” Oliver cried out. “Tommy!”_

_He was desperately thinking about what ways there were for him to save his friend, but he would never get him freed. As he looked at his friend again, all color had disappeared from his face. He wasn’t moving or even breathing._

_“It should have been me,” Oliver sobbed._

_He knew it was the truth. Tommy didn’t deserve this. This was his best friend, the man who had traveled to China two years after Oliver had went missing because there had been the slightest hope that maybe he was still alive. He had searched the world for him. Oliver was sitting right next to his friend and yet he felt there was nothing he could do._

_“Open your eyes, Tommy!” Oliver pleaded, knowing it was hopeless. “Open your eyes!”_

“I need to go,” Oliver said, his voice sounding numb. “I need to check on Felicity.”

He turned around and left, but he heard Thea saying, “Wow, if we continue going by that rate, all guests are laid low within the next couple of minutes.”

While Oliver hurried through the living room, briefly smiling at whoever was coming across him, Oliver told himself to get his focus back. Whatever these dreams were, they needed to stop. His parents and his friends weren’t dying, so he couldn’t waste his energy on that when Felicity needed him right now and he needed her too.

“Oliver?”

“Not now, Mom,” Oliver replied, not even looking at his mother as he took the first steps. His mother caught his forearms and held onto it, though, keeping him from leaving. With a long sigh, he turned around to her. “I am sorry, but right now is not the best time. Felicity-“

“Give her a moment for herself,” Moira told him. “I think she needs a moment.”

“Mom, don’t get me wrong, but you really don’t know-“

“-that Felicity is suffering under the situation of trying for a baby without success?” Moira asked in a whisper, smiling at Oliver encouragingly. “Trust me, Oliver, I do know a little about that.”

“She told you?” Oliver asked, completely surprised since it had been Felicity who had wanted to keep it a secret, even from the people closest to them. He had thought if she told someone than maybe her father, but never his mother. He didn’t know why.

“She didn’t have to,” Moira said. “It was obvious to me, but she did tell me after your last try failed. She came home crying and told me.”

Oliver swallowed hard. He knew the pain Felicity was going through because he felt the same pain. They were being hopeful again and again and in those moments it was like they already had a baby that was taken away from them again when the pregnancy test turned out negative. He didn’t know what losing an actual baby, one that was more than just a hypothetical chance, felt like, but he was sure that his pain of losing those was similar and--

_“Who was that?” Moira asked, cocking her head and putting a hand to his shoulder._

_“That was, um…” Oliver swallowed and took in a deep breath. “She lost the baby. She said she’s said about it, and she’s going to go back to school in Central City. Apparently, she had family there.”_

_“Well, I am sure this has been very traumatic for her,” his mother said with low voice, rubbing her hand up and down his back comfortingly. “But it sounds for the best.”_

_“Sure,” Oliver whispered._

_He lowered his gaze, looking at his phone. Samantha had lost the baby. He wasn’t going to be a dad. He wouldn’t have to tell Laurel that he had cheated on her. He wouldn’t have to tell his father that he had screwed up big time._

_“You okay?” Moira asked._

_“Yeah,” Oliver replied quickly. He chuckled dryly. “Yes. I continue to be the luckiest guy on the planet.”_

_He lowered his gaze once more. Even though he hadn’t meant it, he did realize how hard those words were. He had just lost a child, a child he hadn’t wanted, but a child nonetheless. He should be devastated. Yet all he felt was relief._

_“What… what would I have done if she…” Oliver swallowed, unable to even say it out loud. “I’m not ready to be a dad.”_

_“No,” his mother agreed. “But someday. It’s my fondest hope for you.”_

“I need to go and see Felicity,” Oliver said, his voice sounding weird even to himself.

“Oliver, honey, are you alright?” his mother asked him.

Oliver swallowed. “I need to see Felicity. Tell the others we are sick and won’t come back downstairs tonight and tell dad I am sorry.”

Ignoring his mother’s protest, he turned around and head upstairs. He needed Felicity right now. He needed to see her and hold her and breathe her in to remind him of what was real and what wasn’t. This day had started so great, so normal, but now he felt like his world was falling apart around him or maybe he was the one falling apart. He didn’t know what was more scaring. He just wanted the lightness back to his life. He didn’t want to have any more confusing moments flashing in front of his eyes like that.

Oliver almost ran down the hallway to their bedroom. His hand already reached out for the door handle, he stopped himself and took in a deep breath. What he needed didn’t matter right now, or at least it wasn’t the only thing that mattered. Felicity was in there, sad about something that was very real, while he was just confused by things his mind made up to torture him. Felicity’s pain was real, his wasn’t.

He opened the door and stepped into their bedroom, closing the door behind him again. He heard Felicity in the bathroom, so he took off his jacket, threw it onto the bed and stepped into the door frame. He leaned against the wood, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants, fighting the urge to just grab her and hold her against his chest, so they could share their pain and heal together. He knew it was not what Felicity needed right now, though. He also knew that she knew he was there, so he waited for her to say something.

Not stopping to remove her makeup, Felicity said with angry voice, “They deserve this, you know. They really deserve to have everything they want in life. I don’t want to sound like I don’t feel our friends deserve their happiness. They do deserve it.”

She didn’t look at him, not even in the mirror. Oliver nodded, hoping she would see it nonetheless. He knew that when Felicity was really heartbroken, she could sometimes say kind of mean things. She would feel bad about it later, but in that moment those words would be said. When Felicity was heartbroken, she got angry. In this moment, Felicity was so angry that Oliver feared how broken her heart had to be. No matter what she was going to say now, he knew he would never hold it against her.

“It’s just not fair, you know?” she asked. “We have been trying for years and nothing happens and the two of them just consider to maybe have a baby in a couple of years and Laurel gets pregnant? Where’s the fairness in that?”

Oliver didn’t reply because there was nothing he could say. There were no words of comforts and no words of understanding because the truth was that Oliver didn’t understand it himself, probably because it just wasn’t fair.

Oliver watched Felicity looking at herself in the mirror. Her eyes took herself in, an expression that was more than anger in her eyes. It almost looked like… hate. The thought made his stomach cramp badly.

“Felicity, I-“

Before Oliver got to say anything or even figured out what it was what he going to say, Felicity clenched her hand to a fist and rammed it into the mirror. The glass broke, scattered pieces falling to the sink and the floor. Thin lines of blood were coming from her knuckles and running over her hand. Felicity looked at it with widened eyes like she had no idea what had just happened.

It took a few seconds until Oliver was able to react. He crossed the distance to Felicity quickly, taking her hand between both of his gently. He took a thorough look at the bruise, checking for any splinters that might still be stuck there, but he couldn’t see anything.

“I’ll get a washing cloth to-“

Oliver stopped when Felicity sobbed. He lifted his gaze from her hand to her face, seeing the tears streaming down her cheeks. Her face was screwed up in pain and raw heartbreak. It hurt Oliver even deeper than his own pain. He put his hands to Felicity’s elbows and pulled her close until she was pressed to his chest. Felicity hid her face against his shoulder while she was crying, holding onto his dress shirt like her life depended on it. Oliver wrapped his arms around her shaking body tightly.

_“Mama, no cry,” Tommy told her, stroking his hand over his mother’s blonde hair._

_Felicity just took in a sniffling breath, but she didn’t reply. It only made Oliver worry more. Something had definitely gone wrong and he could only guess what it was._

_“Hey, Emmy, Tommy, how about you go to the living room with William and Millie? You could play a little together,” he suggested, shortly turning his head to seek William’s approval and he nodded quickly. “Daddy’s going to follow soon and bring you the fruits, alright?”_

_“But mommy’s crying,” Emmy told him._

_“I know,” Oliver replied. “Daddy will take care of mommy, okay?”_

_Emmy hesitated for a moment before she nodded. She took Tommy’s hand and pulled him with her into the living room. William shot his father a look before he followed his siblings, bouncing Millie up and down on his hip in the meantime. Oliver strode towards Felicity in the meantime, taking her hands to pull her to her feet and into his arms. She leaned against him without any restraint, actively pressing herself closer to him and wrapping her arms around his waist tightly. Her hands clawed to fists in his henley, keeping him close._

_For a long moment Oliver just held her, letting her cry in his arms. He could feel her tears against his neck and listened to her sobs that were muffled by his henley. He stroked his hands up and down her back comfortingly, not saying a word. It took a long time until her sobs finally ceased and her breaths became deeper again._

_Oliver ducked his head to look at Felicity. Her head leaned against his shoulder, her eyes squeezed shut. She took deep breaths, in through her nose and out through her lips, to calm herself down. She looked everything but calm, but at least she didn’t seem as churning as before._

_“What happened?” Oliver asked in a whisper._

_Felicity’s arms tightened around his waist so much that his ribs hurt. He didn’t complain, though. Instead he just kissed the crown of Felicity’s head and held her even more tightly against him, too._

_“Did someone hurt you?” he whispered when she didn’t reply, the thought making his stomach drop._

_Felicity leaned her head back quickly, shaking her head._

_“No,” she assured him. “No, it’s not… it’s not something like that.”_

_“Okay,” Oliver whispered. He lifted a hand to her face and gently wiped away the tears from her cheeks, drying the wetness they had left there. Felicity leaned into Oliver’s touch with a sigh, closing her eyes. Frowning worriedly, he leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “Will you tell me what’s going on please?”_

_Felicity opened her eyes with a sigh, another tear escaping the corner of her eye. While she was pressing herself impossibly close to him, he wiped the tear away with his thumb and brushed his lips against the corner of her mouth._

_“Thea’s not pregnant,” she finally said._

_“Oh,” Oliver made._

_He felt slight disappointment spreading in himself. This last hour that Felicity had been away he had grown weirdly fond of the idea to help his baby sister with her first baby. Of course he hadn’t known if she really needed help because Thea was great and she had experience with little kids given how often she babysat for them, but it was always different when they were your kids._

_Smiling at Felicity comfortingly, he stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones and asked, “Was she very disappointed?”_

_Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “A little.”_

_“Well, there is still time for her to have a baby,” Oliver explained. He knew how close Felicity and Thea were. Of course Felicity felt with his little sister when she was disappointed. “There is no reason for you to cry over this. Thea is disappointed now, but-“_

_“That’s… that’s not…” Felicity shook her head. “There’s more.”_

_Oliver nodded, waiting for her to explain it. She loosened one hand from his henley to put her fingers around his wrist instead. She took in a deep breath._

_“Thea’s not pregnant, but the second positive pregnancy test Laurel found wasn’t wrong.”_

_Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Laurel is pregnant? I didn’t even know she was dating anyone. Well, in case the father is not available, she has a lot of friends. We can all help her because the truth is that neither of us is ever really alone and-“_

_When Felicity sighed, cocking her head and giving him a look, Oliver stopped. He frowned at her, watching her face closely._

_“It’s not Laurel who’s pregnant,” he stated, reading the words right out of the expression on her face. He frowned. “But if it’s not Thea and not Laurel and Lyla is already pregnant, who-“_

_Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, looking at him urgently. His eyes widened, eying up her face carefully. If it wasn’t Laurel or Thea and Lyla was already out of the game, there really was just one woman left to be pregnant._

_“You… you’re pregnant?”_

“You are going to leave me,” Felicity cried in his arms, pressing herself even closer to him like she wanted to physically stop him from leaving.

Oliver tried to say something or at least hold her more tightly, but he felt frozen, like he couldn’t do anything.

_“Do you think it will get better now?” she asked._

_Oliver sighed. “I don’t know, but I certainly hope so. Maybe Tommy just thought he was getting another Emmy, so this whole baby thing confused him.”_

_Felicity nodded, looking around in the room. “These stars really are beautiful.”_

_“Yes, they are,” Oliver agreed. “It was one of the best ideas you ever had.”_

_“And I have a lot of good ideas,” Felicity added._

_“Yes, absolutely.” Oliver nodded his head. He moved his arm around her waist, putting his warm hand against the small of her back. “I love you, you know that?”_

_Felicity gave him a warm smile. “I had an idea, but it never hurts to hear it.”_

_“I love you,” Oliver whispered right before his lips met hers in a slow and gentle kiss._

_“I love you too,” Felicity replied when they pulled apart only a moment later._

_When Tommy took his siblings into the room, he told his parents to make room in the cozy corner, so they could all lie down. Oliver and Felicity moved apart, so Tommy could lie down next to Oliver, Emmy next to Felicity and William in the middle of them with Millie resting on his chest. There was only little room, but it made it all the more cozy._

_“It was a good idea, Mommy,” Emmy whispered to Felicity. “Tommy loves the stars.”_

_“You think?” Felicity asked back in a whisper and Emmy nodded. Felicity kissed Emmy’s forehead. “Thank you, Baby.”_

_While Emmy was moving closer to Felicity, snuggling her cheek up to her mother’s breast like Oliver usually cuddled with Felicity, Tommy rested his head on the side of William’s body. He took one of Millie’s hands and pointed at the ceiling._

_“Look, Millie,” he said quietly. “Stars are pretty. You like stars too?”_

_Holding Emmy to her tightly, Felicity watched Oliver stroking a hand over Tommy’s dark hair. He looked at him with a smile, his eyes full of love._

_“I am sure she likes them too once she is older.”_

_Tommy smiled happily and kissed Millie’s cheek gently. “I tell you everything.”_

_While Tommy snuggled up to his dad, Oliver and Felicity exchanged meaningful gazes. Maybe they had finally found the key for Tommy to be okay again._

“You are going to leave me for someone who can give you children,” Felicity cried, “your own children.”

Oliver still had no way to reply, no matter how much he tried. More and more scenes were playing in his mind.

_“You are expecting a little” – Dr. Hampton made a meaningful pause – “baby girl.”_

_A baby girl, just like she had thought it would be. Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver, smiling at him happily, and his face beamed with happiness in response._

_“I am going to print you a picture of your daughter,” Dr. Hampton stated. “My printer doesn’t work currently, so I will have to go to the reception. I’ll be back.”_

_Neither Oliver nor Felicity looked after him as he left. They just kept smiling at each other until Oliver bent down and captured Felicity’s lips with his in a gentle kiss._

_“A little girl,” he stated._

_“A little girl,” Felicity repeated. After a moment longer, she frowned, though. “Is it weird that we are so happy just because we know it’s a girl? We wouldn’t be any less happy or any happier if it was a boy. Right?”_

_“Of course we wouldn’t,” Oliver replied. “Knowing the sex just makes it more real, at least for me. I can basically see the little girl with curly, blonde hair in front of me.”_

_Felicity smiled reverently. “It really is a nice thought.”_

_She hoped the baby would have Oliver’s eyes like she had hoped with all their children. She always felt like if you just looked long enough into Oliver’s eyes, the deep blue color of his eyes would pull her under and embrace her in its warmth. Babies with that eyes could probably end wars._

_“Now we have to find a name for her.”_

_“Well, maybe not like right now,” Felicity replied, cocking her head. “Let’s just enjoy that we know it’s a girl and give me some time to think about all the things we girl can outvote you on now that we are in the majority.”_

_Oliver rolled his eyes, bending down a little. With mocking voice, he asked, “Are you sure they won’t rather agree with me? Emmy’s a daddy’s girl and I am sure Millie is already growing up to be one, too. I am going to make sure it won’t be any different with this baby here.”_

_“No, she will definitely be on my side,” Felicity disagreed._

_Oliver grinned in response. “The war is on, Mrs. Queen.”_

Oliver had trouble breathing. His arms tightened around Felicity, who was still crying and sobbing against the side of his neck how much she feared that he was going to leave her. He wished he could tell her that he wouldn’t because he knew that he would never leave her and he knew that she needed to hear that from him. Oliver couldn’t speak, though.

Whatever was happening with him, it felt less and less like daydreams and more like – Oliver barely dared to even think it – memories. William, Emmy, Tommy, Millie, these names made something with him. He felt his heart swelling with pride and love at the thought of these four names, even when he couldn’t say exactly why. He didn’t have kids. The fact that Felicity was crying in his arms, afraid that it was going to cause him to leave her, should be enough of an evidence for that.

Oliver kissed the top of Felicity’s head, tightening his arms around her once more. He wouldn’t leave her just to have kids. He wasn’t even going to lose himself in these dreams of having children because it wasn’t fair to Felicity and it wasn’t fair to him either. He would have to stick to reality and--

_“I’m going in,” Oliver announced._

_“You’re sure?” John replied._

_“Yes,” Oliver simply replied and a wide grin spread on his lips. “I have my wife waiting in bed for me.”_

_“This never stops getting gross, you know?” Roy asked. “What if I told you I was going back to my wife in bed?”_

_“Well, I for one would ask if you have secretly getting married to someone else, too,” Thea replied. “And you should consider your answer thoroughly because you are standing right in my line of fire.”_

_“In that case-“_

_“Guys,” John said quietly, “focus.”_

_“Mr. Terrific, is it save for Arrow to go in?” Laurel asked._

_“Mr. Terrific,” Curtis replied, “is that my codename now? I like it. It’s so-“_

_“Curtis,” John hissed._

_“And there goes the anonymity,” Curtis replied, “but the answer should be yes.”_

_Oliver grinned to himself. It had been a while since he had been in the field the last time. He had taken a little time off to take care of his family, just like John had taken a little step back to take care of Lyla. That was why the responsibility for the team had been in Roy’s hands for the most part. Anyway, Oliver had almost forgotten how much fun it could be to be out in the field, especially when everyone was there, too. Of course he missed Felicity, though. She was just the heart of team._

_Oliver climbed up the fire escape staircase. Staying pressed to the wall, he took a look through the window into the dark apartment that probably served as the new laboratory for the production of a new generation of Vertigo. Apparently, after the last laboratories had been busted by the team, whoever was responsible for the further development of the drug now, had decided to take a step back and produce the drugs in a smaller way. Too bad for them that the team had found the location nonetheless._

_“There is nobody in?” Oliver asked Curtis once more._

_“There shouldn’t be,” Curtis replied._

_Oliver frowned slightly, feeling like his answer should be a little more encouraging. Curtis just didn’t have the experience Felicity had yet, he thought to himself. Oliver checked the windows for one that he could open up. He was lucky with the second already._

_“Amateurs,” Oliver grumbled to himself._

_He climbed into the dark apartment, his bow still drawn. He knew John was keeping sight on the building to make sure nobody was coming and to have his back. He also knew he could trust Curtis when he said that nobody should be here, especially since Thea, Roy and Laurel were following the three guys living here through the city. Their job was to take them out and hand them over to the police if Oliver and John gave their go after collecting enough evidence here and take a test of the drug to figure out what they were dealing with._

_Part of Oliver had been much more in the mood of a good hand-to-hand-fight today. It would have been a great day to get rid of some energy. Lately he felt that maybe he wasn’t fully stretched though that should be a good thing. Felicity always told him to relax a little more._

_Continuing to search the apartment for any threats, Oliver smiled to himself. Felicity was so much better now. She had come back to herself like Oliver had always hoped she would. She was happy again, unburdened. Oliver didn’t want to think about how much longer it could have lasted. He wanted to enjoy that she had gotten better like Felicity wanted to enjoy that-_

_When Oliver felt a stitching pain in his thigh, he hissed._

_“What’s going on?” John asked immediately._

_Not saying a word, Oliver moved his hand to his thigh and felt for what had hit him. Groaning, he pulled a syringe from his thigh. He must have stepped into some kind of trap._

_“I think I might have unleashed their personal security system.”_

_“No way, there shouldn’t be any-“_

_“I have been injected with something,” Oliver explained. “I am not sure what it is, but-“_

_Oliver squeezed his eyes shut, sucking in a deep breath. Black spots were dancing in front of his eyes, making him feel dizzy. He only heard blurred sounds coming from the comms when he collapsed to the floor. He blinked a few times before everything went black._

His lungs were burning from still holding his breath and he had been holding his breath for quite some time now. He needed oxygen, but he just still didn’t get to take in a breath. It was impossible.

Only now he got it. It had been memories that had been haunting him all day today because this wasn’t real. This was some drug-induced dream. He had been fighting so hard to forget these flashes of memory because he had thought this was his reality when really this was the dream. When Oliver’s lungs finally filled with a deep breath, he closed his eyes. Finally, it all made sense.

Now he just needed to find out how to wake up.

Oliver was about to move, trying to find a way to wake up, when he realized that Felicity was still crying in his arms, clinging to him for dear life. Oliver knew she wasn’t the real Felicity. She wasn’t his Felicity. She was a version of her, one that his mind had come up with, though. It was not the same, but too close to ignore. He couldn’t just leave her, especially not like this.

“Felicity, hey,” Oliver said gently, putting his hands to her cheeks and making her look at him. Her eyes were red from crying and tears continued to roll down her face. “Felicity, no matter what will happen, no matter the circumstances, I will always be with you. I will always be by your side. I will always love you. As long as you are in my life, I am happy.”

Felicity swallowed, taking in a sniffling breath. “You sound like you are saying goodbye.”

“I will never leave you,” Oliver whispered.

He felt a stitch of guilt in his chest. He knew that he was going to leave this Felicity, but only go back to his Felicity, the real Felicity. It was probably irrational, but he did feel sorry for leaving her already. She seemed to be in so much pain and though she wasn’t real, she was so close to being real that leaving her made him feel guilty. Oliver wasn’t sure if that made any sense, but it was what he was feeling.

“I love you,” Oliver whispered.

He lowered his head and kissed her. Their lips moved against each other’s slowly in a gentle kiss. It was weird how she felt and tasted so real even now that Oliver knew she wasn’t. When their lips parted, Oliver kissed the tip of her nose and whispered, “I am getting you something for your knuckles, okay?”

Felicity nodded. “Okay. Thanks.”

Oliver smiled, pecking her lips once more. “I will be right back.”

Felicity nodded once more, letting go of him. Oliver smiled at her before he turned around and left the room, He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to do now because he wasn’t sure that there was any way for him to wake up from this dream as long as the drug was still in his system. He had to hope that John had gotten him out of the apartment and they were now waiting for him to wake up again-

He was halfway down the stairs when he suddenly felt a hand on his wrist. He turned around, but nobody was there. Nobody was touching his wrist, yet he could feel the warm touch of familiar fingers around it. He would recognize that gentle touch anywhere.

“Felicity,” he whispered.

“This almost reminds me of our first night down here,” he heard her voice say. “Only that you are not covered in your own blood. Not that I am complaining.”

Oliver looked around, but Felicity was nowhere to be found. Looking down at where he could still feel her fingers holding onto her wrist, he realized that this had to mean that the effect of the drug was ceasing. The thin lines between dream and reality were blurring even more and more. In a couple of hours or minutes or maybe even seconds he would wake up and this dream would be over, this world here fallen apart.

Oliver turned back towards to the front room. He could hear the music and a bable of voices coming from the living room. If all of this was going to fall apart, all the people he had lost and gotten back here would be lost to him again. The thought felt like a punch into the stomach and for the break of a second the thought of finding a way to stay, but the thought was gone as quickly as it had come. Oliver needed to get back because even though he was going to lose a huge part of the family he had here, he had built a new one that he needed to get back to.

That left only one conclusion. Oliver needed to use this chance of having the closest thing to the people he had lost and say goodbye to them. He hadn’t gotten a chance to really say goodbye to either of the people he had lost. This was his chance.

Not hesitating a second since he knew that the risk of being pulled back into reality before he had gotten the chance say goodbye, Oliver hurried down the rest of the stairs. He had just reached the foot when Tommy came from the living room.

“Hey, I was just about to go upstairs and check if you and Felicity-“ Tommy started, but stopped and pointed at Oliver’s chest. “Is that blood?”

“Felicity got hurt, but it’s not bad,” Oliver explained almost a little breathlessly. For a split second, he wondered how to say goodbye to his friend when the words suddenly just bubble out of him. “I have a son. I have two sons actually, but I only learned about the older son when he was already a teenager and younger has been born. Anyway, my younger son, Felicity’s and my son actually, is named Tommy. I named him after you.”

“You have a child?” Tommy asked, frowning deeply. “Or rather two children?”

“Actually, I have five children. Well, four since the youngest is not born yet,” Oliver corrected. “Two boys and three girls.”

“Oliver, have you bumped your head?”

Oliver chuckled since he knew it couldn’t make any sense for Tommy. His chuckle turned into a gasp when his heart clenched tightly, though. A piercing pain ripped through his chest and he suddenly felt the same dizziness he had felt before he had passed out in those dealers’ apartment. Another wave of pain hit him, making him temporarily lose his balance. He blindly reached out his hand and held onto Tommy’s shoulder for balance.

“Man, are you sure you’re alright?” Tommy asked.

Oliver felt his breathing shorten. It was like his body needed more and more air, but his lungs couldn’t take in enough, so his breathing quickened more and more.

“What’s going- Oh my god, Oliver, what happened?” he heard his worried mother say before she approached them quickly. She put a hand to his chest and one to his back, looking at him worriedly. When Oliver didn’t answer, still in need of breath, she turned to Tommy. “What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Tommy replied, “but he is acting weird and-“

“Mom,” Oliver said, finally able to get the word out. He straightened up as much as the pain in his chest allowed him to, so he could turn to his mother and tell her, “Mom, I am incredibly grateful for all you have done for me. I might have been angry with you for all the time I have missed with William and the mistrust Samantha had in Felicity and me because of the money you offered her. I know that you were just doing what you thought was best for all of us and that you tried to protect me. I might not agree with it now, but I understand where you were coming from, especially given who I used to be. I forgive you and I love you.”

When he hugged his mother, he angled his head down to push his nose into her hair and breathe her in. He remembered how when he had been a little child or even later when he had really messed up like with getting Samantha pregnant, knowing his mother was by his side had always made everything easier for him. It was one of the many reasons he was so happy to know that his children had a mother who was just like that for him. Knowing that he would wake up and never get to smell her again made tears well in his eyes.

“Oliver, you are not making any sense,” Moira whispered into his ear.

Oliver pulled out of the hug, looking at his mother with tear-filled eyes. He was about to tell her that he knew she had to think he was crazy, but he really wasn’t when another wave of pain ran through his body. He wasn’t quick enough to find something to hold onto for balance this time. As his legs gave in, Oliver slumped down onto the floor.

“Call an ambulance!” he heard his mother’s voice calling out.

Oliver had to squeeze his eyes shut several times to make the black dots that were blocking his sight go away. He was hyperventilating so much that his chest hurt from the effort now.

“Dad,” he chocked out. “I need dad.”

“Robert!” Moira called, looking back over her shoulder. Then she turned to Tommy. “Go and get Felicity.”

It didn’t take long until his father was kneeling next to him, asking, “Oliver, what’s going on?”

“I-“ Oliver squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and forced himself to suck in a deep breath. He needed to focus. With slurring voice, he explained, “Years ago you sent me on a mission and though there were times I hated you for that and I had to change a lot about that mission and failed several times along the way, what you asked of me is a huge part of what made me the man I am today. I became a better man because of you and I love you for it and- and-”

“Oh my god, he is losing consciousness!” his mother yelled in panic, a sob escaping her lips.

“Oliver!”

Felicity appeared in his sight. She kneeled right next to his head, framing his face with her hands. Tears were falling from her eyes and dropping onto his face.

“Honey, you are going to be okay. You are going to be okay,” she told him. “Everything is going to be okay. You…”

The black dots spread in front of his eyes until the darkness embraced him and pulled him away. If it wasn’t for Felicity’s soothing words over his mother’s cries and his father’s desperate calls for help, Oliver wasn’t sure if he could stay this calm. With Felicity’s voice in his ear, he let the darkness take over, though. He needed to trust that when he woke up, she was going to be there, welcoming him back to what was real.

\----->

Felicity rubbed her thumb over the thick vein on Oliver’s forearm, watching with worry as his heartrate quickened more and more while his breathing was growing shorter. Not losing sight of the monitor, Felicity put her hand to Oliver’s chest, trying to calm him down. His body continued with the stress, though.

Felicity knew that the effect of the drug was slowly ceasing. Once they had been able to find out what neurotoxin protein the new generation of Vertigo was based on, they had injected Oliver with an antidote.

Apparently, Argus had already had gotten their hands on the drug, analyzed it and occupied themselves with a way to stop the effects. Lyla wasn’t working lately because of her pregnancy, but she had mobilized her resources at Argus to make sure Oliver didn’t have to stay drugged longer than necessary. Felicity was kind of curious what Argus was doing with the drug, but she guessed that an organization that planted explosive chips in people’s brains had some way to put a drug that was supposed to make dreams come true into good use, well, or at least their use.

When Oliver panted heavily, Felicity felt herself being pulled back to the situation at hand. She watched the way Oliver’s face was screwed up in pain worriedly. Just when she considered calling Lyla and asking if he was sure this was right, when Oliver suddenly sat up, his eyes wide as he was looking around.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked, rubbing her hands over his chest. “Oliver, are you okay?”

Oliver looked around for a moment without orientation. He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again repeatedly like he couldn’t see correctly. When his eyes found hers, their gazes locking, his breathing calmed down a little.

“Hi,” he said breathlessly, looking at her.

“Hi,” Felicity replied. She frowned at the expression on Oliver’s face. He almost looked like he didn’t recognize her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m-“ Oliver stopped to squeeze his eyes shut and shake his head. When he looked at her once more, his eyes were a lot more focused. “I’m fine. I just-“

Oliver tried to lift his arms, but he was stopped by the handcuffs that kept his hands to the med table. Frowning, he looked down at the metal around his wrists.

“We thought it was a good idea to keep you safe.”

“And to keep you safe,” Oliver added and Felicity was sure he was saying that thinking about the last time he had been drugged and had suddenly choked her. “Can you free me?”

“Of course,” Felicity replied.

She quickly went over to her workstation and grabbed the keys for the handcuff. As soon as she was back, she unlocked Oliver, freeing him from the things. They had really just put them on to prevent Oliver from hurting himself since according to Argus the people who had been drugged with this version of Vertigo had been hurting themselves, so-

Her thoughts came to a sudden stop when Oliver wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. His shirt was drenched with sweat, but Felicity didn’t mind. She wrapped her arms around Oliver’s torso and pushed her nose against his shoulder, breathing her in. She needed it, needed him. She could feel Oliver’s nose against the crown of her head, knowing that he needed to smell her scent, too.

Felicity closed her eyes, enjoying being so close to him. The last hours since she had arrived here, she had sat by his side and just waited for him to wake up. She hated waiting because there was nothing you could do other than wait for time to finally pass. Now that Oliver had woken up and was okay, so was she. No matter how often it happened, she’d never get used to him being hurt.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked, dropping his head to her shoulder and hiding her face against the side of her neck.

“Hm?” Felicity asked, massaging his scalp with her gentle fingers and eliciting a content hum from him that made her smile. “Are you feeling dizzy?”

“A little,” Oliver mumbled. “I need to ask you something.”

“Everything,” Felicity whispered in response.

She thought Oliver would pull back to look her in the eyes when he was going to ask her whatever he needed to know, but he just tightened his arms around her.

“Do you ever feel like I only love you because you gave me a family? Or that our marriage would be over now if we hadn’t been able to have children?”

Felicity frowned slightly, wondering where this was coming from. Of course kids had been quite the topic for them in their marriage. Oliver had wanted kids and family, she knew that. It had never bothered her, though, because she had wanted this, too. They both had wanted to start a family together and even if there had been some minor disagreements and some big surprises along the way, they had always been on the same page when it had mattered.

“I know that you love me for more than my ability to have your children,” Felicity replied, knowing that whatever the drug had done with him caused him to be so shaken. Oliver needed reassurance. “There is so much more to us than our kids.”

“And you know that I would have never left you if we couldn’t have kids, right?”

“I know that,” Felicity assured him.

It was the truth. Felicity was sure that it would have taken more than not having kids to pull them apart. Of course, she didn’t knew the pain of wanting a baby and not being able to have one, so maybe that was wrong. It didn’t matter, though, since that was never going to be a part of their reality.

“In my dream, we couldn’t have kids,” Oliver said with a sigh and pulled away enough to look at her. His arms stayed wrapped around her waist. “At the beginning of the day, we were still so hopeful, but the more time passed… I don’t know… you thought I was going to leave you.”

“I know you wouldn’t,” Felicity replied, putting a hand to his cheek and watching him lean into her touch. She smiled, not saying a word for a long moment. “Is that what you dreamed about? Us not being able to have babies?”

“It was part of it,” Oliver answered without opening his eyes. “I think I’ve never been on the Gambit, though. My parents were alive and happy. Laurel and Tommy were married and expecting their first child. Quentin and Dinah were still married. Sara was alive.”

Felicity smiled sadly. So many things seemed to have turned to the worse since Oliver had gotten on the Gambit. For years they had become worse and worse and worse without any light at the end of the tunnel until there had been a turning point, whenever that had been exactly.

“If you never went on the Gambit, how did we meet?”

“I have no idea,” Oliver replied. He opened his eyes to look at her. “I wasn’t the Arrow.”

“So we were one of those terribly boring married couples?” Felicity asked with a chuckle, trying to kind of lighten the mood.

“I don’t know.” Oliver sighed. He rubbed his hands over his face before he put them to Felicity’s baby bump, stroking back and forth gently. “I can see why they thought this drug was a good idea. The potential to grow addicted to it has to be very high.”

“You would like to go back there?” Felicity asked compassionately.

“No,” Oliver replied firmly, “but I guess a lot of people would.”

Felicity nodded slowly. Oliver had family in the real life, people who needed him and counted on him, people he loved and who loved him back. He had lost a lot of people, but he had gained new ones. For someone who had been less lucky, maybe it would be more tempting to escape into a dream that could give him everything they wanted.

“I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you to leave your parents,” Felicity whispered, “or Tommy. It really must have been a dream come true.”

Oliver frowned for a moment, watching his hands on her baby bump. It took a few minutes before he looked at her with a thoughtful expression on his face.

“In a lot of ways it was, yes,” he said eventually, “but in so many others it wasn’t. I think the drug just takes your pain and your worries and turns them into the exact opposite. If I had never been on the Gambit, so many people’s lives had stayed untouched. So many people were still alive. Then on the other hand I was worried about if your happiness. Pregnancy is a struggle for your health, it has been these past months. Maybe that was why we couldn’t have babies in that dream. It was like a way to protect you from a prenatal depression. It didn’t make you any happier. Your parents were also married. You adored your dad and he loved you so much.”

Even hearing it felt weird to Felicity. She couldn’t imagine how it must have felt being in the middle of that kind of world.

“I think the drug made me see a world where we were both supposed to be happy because what causes us to be occasionally unhappy was changed,” Oliver added. “It didn’t make us any happier.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “I guess that’s good since it will at least help you to stay away from another dose of Vertigo. If we aren’t any happier there, then there is no reason to go back.”

Oliver smile and pulled her a little closer. He kissed underside of her jaw, the side of her neck and her collarbone before he smiled at her. “Sara once said to me that she’d chose a nightmare that was real over a dream that wasn’t anytime. Our life is far away from a nightmare, but even if things were different, I’d choose the real you and our real family over one that was only in my imagination anytime. Life was good in that dream, but it’s only full when it’s real. Does that make sense?”

Smiling, Felicity framed Oliver’s face with her hands and kissed his lips. When she pulled back, she just looked at Oliver and he looked back at her. No words were spoken, but they both knew that they agreed that what Oliver had said made sense. Relief spread on his face at her understanding and he turned his face to kiss the palm of her hand.

Felicity smiled, nodding her head towards the metal stairs. “Let’s go home.”


	225. A name for a Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit by victori96572376 (twitter)

“Oliver, this is me noticing you staring.”

Felicity only shot him a short look back over her shoulder before she turned back to her computer screen. Her ponytail swayed behind her from the movement. Her fingers continued dancing over the keyboard quickly, typing away whatever codes were needed to upgrade the security down here in the lair.

With a smile on his lips, Oliver strolled up the few steps to her working area and positioned himself behind her. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, wrapping her ponytail around his hand in the meantime. Then he gently tugged at her hair until Felicity angled her head back and he could brush his lips against hers.

The kiss started out slowly, really just a brush of their lips against each other’s. Challenged by the way Felicity’s fingers were still typing unwaveringly, Oliver moved the tip of his tongue against her bottom lip and she opened up to him with a low sigh. His tongue stroked against hers slowly, causing Felicity’s fingers to slow down until they eventually stopped. Smiling about his victory over her self-control, Oliver pecked her lips once more before he kissed the tip of her nose and her forehead and finally straightened back up. His smile only widened at the slightly unfocussed expression on her face.

“Hi,” Oliver said.

“Hi,” Felicity replied, still looking at him without much of a focus in her eyes. Only after she had blinked several times and shaken her head, she seemed to be really looking at him. “Hi.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed the top of her head once more when she focused back onto her screen. Then she sat down at the edge of her desk next to her keyboard and just went back to watching her like he had done before. It never failed to amaze him how focused Felicity was when she was working. She typed almost like her life depended on it. Her eyes took in every character she had typed, trying to find any imperfection in her code.

“You’re still staring,” Felicity said, not even shooting a short look in his direction. “Everything alright?”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed affirmatively. “Everything alright.”

He stretched out his legs in front of him, crossing his ankles, and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Cocking his head, he watched her again. Felicity’s eyes stayed focused on the screen for some moments until she shot some looks into his direction. Eventually she pressed her lips together, typed some more commands and somehow made the computer take over and do whatever she wanted it to do.

With a low sigh, she leaned back in her chair and turned towards him and mimicked his posture with her arms crossed in front of her chest and her head cocked. “What, Oliver?”

“I think we need to talk.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment, perking up her eyebrows, before she burst out into laughter. Oliver frowned at her reaction despite the smile that spread on his face. After months of depression, Felicity had been a lot better lately. Yet hearing her laugh like this still made his heart flutter with relief every time.

“I am sorry,” Felicity managed to say between her chuckles, shaking her head, “but you said this so deadly serious that, if our marriage wasn’t as happy as it is, I might have thought you wanted to give me the break-up talk.”

Oliver thought about that for a second before he chuckled, too. He moved a hand through his short hair and lowered his gaze for a moment. “Yes, sorry.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Felicity told him. “I know you’d never break up with me.”

“You do know?” Oliver asked almost in a whisper.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, giving him a smile. “Kind of, yes.”

Oliver smiled at her for a couple of seconds before he lowered his gaze to his feet. It had been a week since he had been hit with a dose of the latest generation of Vertigo and had been hallucinating a world where he had never gone on the Gambit. He had had all his loved ones back in his life and yet grown to be a responsible adult and even been married to Felicity. Apart from the obvious imperfection that none of that had been real, his marriage with Felicity had been overshadowed by their trouble of having babies. He still heard her hallucinated voice and could still feel her shaking body when she had been crying in his arms, fearing that he would leave her if she couldn’t give him kids.

When Felicity got up from her chair and stepped in front of him, Oliver spread his legs a little and put his hands to Felicity’s hips and pull her closer. As soon as the warm swell of her stomach pressed against his abs, he sighed and let his hands travel over the baby bump slowly. Felicity put her hands to his cheeks, framing his face, and kissed him. Sighing, Oliver responded to the kiss and pulled Felicity closer to him. It was a long and slow kiss that reassured Oliver in ways he had needed several times these last days. The hallucination had felt so real that it had left its marks on him. He knew he would need some more time to fully shake the weird feeling it had left him with.

“Better?” Felicity asked after the kiss had ended and she had rested her forehead against his.

“Much better,” Oliver replied. “Thanks.”

Felicity nuzzled his nose and brushed her lips against his once more. “Anything you want.”

“Anything?” Oliver asked, pulling away just enough to look at her and puckering his lips innocently.

“Anything unless you want to talk about baby names. In that case it is everything but that.”

“Oh, come on!” Oliver grumbled.

Felicity chuckled, turning away and starting to walk up and down her working area. She mumbled some words that Oliver didn’t understand. Sighing, he sat down in her chair and watched her.

“I don’t understand why you don’t want to talk names,” Oliver said eventually. Felicity turned around to him, giving him an incredulous look that made him press his lips together for a moment. “Okay, I do understand why you don’t want to talk names, at least partly.”

“Partly?” Felicity asked. She approached him, holding her hands out in front of her. “Oliver, we use to tear each other to pieces over discussing girls’ names.”

“We do not tear each other to pieces,” Oliver replied, sliding forward on the chair and mimicking the way Felicity held her hands.

“There are scars on your body saying otherwise,” Felicity told him and pushed his hands apart with hers.

Oliver cocked his head. “Those scars are hardly your work.”

“Can you prove it?” Felicity asked. When Oliver shot her another look, she rolled her eyes and sighed. “Okay, fine. The scars are not my work, but we do not talk girls’ names easily. We are fighting.”

“We are discussing those names,” Oliver corrected and, clearing his throat, added, “vigorously.”

The look Felicity shot him made him chuckle. He reached out his arms and pulled her towards him until she was sitting on his lap sideways. He kissed the side of her neck gently and rested his chin on her shoulder.

“How about a compromise?” he suggested.

Felicity perked up an eyebrow doubtingly, but she leaned back against him and moved her fingers up and down his arms around her waist. “We don’t do compromises when discussing baby names.”

“We could agree on one this time,” Oliver replied.

“And what would that be?”

“Well, you agree to discussing girls’ name,” he explained, “and I will say yes to whatever name you will suggest.”

Felicity frowned, turning her head to him. “What?”

Oliver smiled at the confusion in her eyes. They had never had it easy with trying to find a girl’s name. It had been hard enough with Emmeline and they had only been able to agree to it because it had seemed like a mixture of Evenly and Emma and hence kind of a compromise between two of their suggestions. With Tommy, they had just agreed on the name Madeleine when Thea had reminded him of a girl he had been with whose name had been Madeleine. He had offered to agree to Charlotte, one of the names on Felicity’s list then, but she had rejected the offer since she had known that he hadn’t liked the name that much. Finding a name they could both agree on had been so impossible that eventually Felicity had called the doctor and asked what the baby’s sex was. With Millie, they had started discussing names when Felicity’s bath additive, Lovely Camille, had inspired them. Anyway, neither of them had ever really voluntarily given up on the right to choose the name.

“Things have been hard for us as they are,” Oliver told her. “I don’t want to make it any harder. I just think that it’s time to talk about the name. We know we are going to have a girl. You are twenty-six weeks along. It would be nice to have a name for her, you know?”

“But you’d let me choose?” Felicity asked.

Oliver nodded. “Yes, I’d let you choose.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him slightly and put her fingers around his chin. “Is this because of what happened while you have been drugged with Vertigo?”

“No,” Oliver replied firmly. “I decided to offer this to you before that happened already.”

“Why?” Felicity asked.

“Because like I said we have been through enough as it is,” Oliver told her. “So if you think that discussing names is going to cause too much struggle, we will keep this discussion as short as possible.”

“So it’s because of my depression?” Felicity asked.

Oliver sighed. “This is because I love you and I trust you to give our daughter a wonderful name.”

Felicity puckered her lips for a moment before she asked, “What if I want to name her Sadie?”

“I am okay with that.”

“But you rejected the name when I suggested it for Millie last year.”

“I wouldn’t have suggested the name myself, but if you like it, I am sure our baby will, too.” Oliver smiled and leaned down to kiss her baby bump. “Right, Sadie?”

Felicity grumbled and pulled at his hair lightly until Oliver straightened back up again. He looked at her with a frown.

“I don’t want her name to be Sadie,” Felicity explained.

“Okay, so suggest another name and my answer will be yes again.”

Felicity puckered her lips, looking away from him. Oliver watched her patiently, just waiting for her to tell him what name they would give their daughter. The truth was that he really didn’t care who of them chose their daughter’s name. It was fun teasing each other about choosing girls’ names, but he knew that their daughter would have a great name no matter what.

Minutes passed and Felicity didn’t say anything, though. Oliver let his hand travel to her hip. His thumb snuck under the fabric of her pullover and rubbed over the naked skin there. When she looked at him with an unreadable expression, Oliver perked up his eyebrows.

“I feel pressured.”

Oliver chuckled. “You don’t have to decide about the name right now. Let’s just say you take time until the weekend and-“

“It’s not about the time. It’s about being the one to blame if she isn’t happy with her name.”

“I take the blame if she complains,” Oliver offered. “Besides, it’s not like you will call her Abstinence or Apple or whatever terrible baby names are out there.”

“Parents call their baby Abstinence?”

“According to the internet they do,” Oliver confirmed. “And your shock only proves to me that I am right. You would never give our daughter a name like that.”

“Still,” Felicity said with a sigh.

She got up and paced up and down, her hands on her hips. Oliver leaned back with a sigh and watched her. He had thought she would happily suggest a dozen of baby names before deciding on one and he had been sure that no matter what she decided, he would happily agree to her suggestion. Obviously, he had been wrong.

“What about Matilda?” he asked, remembering it had been one of the names she had suggested when she had been pregnant with Tommy.

“Since we are not in the twenty-first century, no,” Felicity repeated his answer from back then. Oliver was already thinking about what other names she had suggested when Felicity said, “What about Adelaide?”

Oliver frowned. “I suggested that name when you were pregnant with Tommy, right after you suggested Matilda actually.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders and came back towards him. She put one arm around his neck and moved the other hand into his hair when she sat back down on his lap. She moved her fingers through his short hair for a few seconds, just watching him.

“I like the name. I liked it when you suggested it. I just couldn’t let you win.”

“And now you can?”

“You were the one who agreed to accept whatever name I suggest,” Felicity whispered. “You already admitted defeat.”

Oliver pressed his lips together and rolled them into his mouth, humming. He wasn’t sure if he should be slightly frustrated because if she had just agreed to Adelaide back then they would have been able to avoid all the drama about the name Madeleine or if he should just be amused. He decided on the second and lifted his gaze to the roof, shaking his head. Then he looked back at Felicity.

“So Adelaide it is?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She took his hand and put their laced fingers to the baby bump where Oliver could feel their daughter kicking against her parents’ hands.

“I think she likes it,” Felicity said with a smile. Then she lowered her head a little to get closer to their baby. “Adelaide Grace Queen, what do you say, baby?”

As if hearing her mother’s words, their unborn daughter kicked against their hands. Felicity turned her head and smiled at Oliver. He smiled back at her.

“I think this was a yes,” Oliver stated.

“I think so,” Felicity agreed.

Oliver smiled. He let the name of their unborn daughter roll off his tongue. “Adelaide Grace Queen. I love it.”

Felicity chuckled. “Do you know that we have been discussing the middle name Grace for more than six years now. We have discussed it for Emmy already, but we never got to use it.”

“Well, maybe this time,” Oliver replied with a smile.

“Maybe this time,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head, “though I have to warn you that our life and our babies are don’t really have a reputation of making births easy for us. With our luck, I am sure we will have to name her after someone else wo saves us or whatever.”

“Let’s just hope that won’t happen,” Oliver said.

Felicity nodded. “Right.”

“So Adelaide Grace Queen,” Oliver said once more. “You chose the right name, just like I knew you would.”

“We chose the right name,” Felicity corrected.

Oliver smiled. “Yes, we did.”

He kept his hand on Felicity’s baby bump when he brushed his lips against hers. Felicity ducked her head and pressed her lips back to his, responding to the kiss. Addie kicked against their hands approvingly.


	226. Intimacy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> As you know, I am working on my thesis. That means there will be less updates in the next weeks. I will try my best to get something written at least every other week. With my muli-chapter "To make you feel my love" ending soon, I might have some more time. I am waiting to start posting the next multi-chapter that I started working on a couple of months ago already until the thesis is done and I have more time...

Felicity frowned when she stepped into the bedroom and found it empty. She could have sworn that Oliver had come back from the lair while she had taken care that Millie was falling back asleep.

“Oliver?”

When she didn’t get an answer, she shrugged her shoulders, deciding that she must have been wrong. If she wasn’t so tired for being woken by Millie in the middle of the night, she might have decided to check that nobody had burgled. She only slept a couple of minutes before Millie had woken her again, making her feel even more exhausted than she had been before the sleep. Besides, she trusted their alarm system, so she was sure that she must have just overheard something else. Maybe Emmy had snuck into her little brother’s room to sleep there. Sometimes she still did that.

Yawning, Felicity strolled towards the bed. She was about to lie back down when she noticed the stains of dried drool on her shirt. With a tired sigh, she took her pajama shirt off and dropped it to the floor. She was just about to go to the walk-in closet and get herself a new one when she noticed that the shirt Oliver had worn yesterday lay carelessly discarded on the floor. She grabbed it from the floor and put it on, smiling at the way it fit her rounded stomach perfectly.

“Did you call me?”

“Oh my god,” Felicity gasped frightened, turning around with her hand pressed to her heart.

“Sorry,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, lifting his hands in a gesture of innocence. “I didn’t want to go into Millie’s nursery and risk waking her up again, so I decided to just take a quick shower and wait for you in bed. I thought it would take longer to calm her down.”

Felicity just hummed absentmindedly. She was too distracted by the sight in front of her. Oliver was only wearing his sweatpants that sat low on his hips. His hair was tousled and wet from the shower and it seemed like he hadn’t put much effort into toweling himself. Drops of water were running down his chest and over his abs.

Licking her lips, Felicity scrutinized him thoroughly. Had he always looked this sexy?

She felt her skin starting to prickle. Goosebumps elicited on her arms and crept up to her shoulders from where they spread down her back. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, preventing a strangled sound to fall from her lips at the way her body reacted to the sight. It was ridiculous. She and Oliver had been married for almost seven years now and had been together for almost eight years. She wasn’t supposed to react like a horny teenager. Then again, only a year ago she had climbed Oliver like a tree at any given opportunity until her highly sexual and very potent husband had demanded a break from her hormone-driven body.

Horny, Felicity thought to herself after a moment of pause. Was that what she was? Shocked, she realized that it must have been forever since she had felt horny the last time. She couldn’t even remember when she had been horny the last time, never mind how it felt to be horny.

She dug her front teeth deeper into her bottom lip as she watched a drop of water rolling down the side of his neck and over his chest to his abs. It dipped into his belly button before following the thin line of hair to the waistband of his sweatpants. Felicity kept her gaze right there, feeling the tingling of her skin increasing.

“Felicity,” Oliver said, clearing his throat, “my eyes are up here, you know?”

“Huh?” Felicity made, lifting her gaze to his eyes quickly. She had to blink several times and shake her head to shake off the fuzzy-headed feeling. “Sorry. Did you say something?”

The amused grin on Oliver’s face widened. He looked down at him for a second before leaning into the door to the en-suit bathroom. He flexed his abs, the muscles looking even more defined now than they did without effort anyway, and cocked his head. “Like what you see?”

“Very,” Felicity admitted unashamedly.

Oliver chuckled quietly and just watched her for a moment before he approached her. He framed her face with his big hands, stroking her cheekbones with his thumbs. His calloused fingertips felt rough against her soft skin, just like Felicity loved it. He leaned in for a kiss but stopped for a moment, just breathing the same air as she did, before he closed the gap between their lips and kissed her. Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes, leaning against Oliver completely and wrapping her arms around his waist.

Felicity felt the tingling of her skin intensifying and spreading all through her body. It focused upon her lower belly and connected right with her core. Felicity pressed her thighs together, hoping it would help with the need she felt, but it didn’t. If there had been any doubt about being horny before, that was cleared up now. She was horny.

Just when Felicity was about to deepen the kiss and send some more obvious signs his way, Oliver pulled away. He took a little step back. Still holding her face in his hands, he gave her a smiled and suggested, “Let’s go to sleep. Today has been awfully long.”

“I don’t want to sleep just yet,” Felicity replied, snuggling back to his chest once more.

Oliver perked up his eyebrows, a content smile playing on his lips. He nuzzled her nose with his for a moment before he asked, “And what do you want to do instead?”

Felicity hummed thoughtfully, puckering her lips. Without taking her eyes off his, she hooked her fingers under the waistband of his sweatpants. She pressed her palms against the soft skin of his hips, not at all surprised that he didn’t wear anything underneath, and lowered her hands slowly. While Felicity slid her hands and with them the sweatpants lower and lower, she could basically see the moment it clicked. He sucked in a deep breath through his nose and swallowed hard. His tongue darted out to wet his lips, making Felicity’s eyes momentarily flicker down to his mouth.

Once she had reached the upper part of his thighs, Felicity let go of his sweatpants. They ended up pooling around Oliver’s ankles, leaving him completely naked in front of her. Still, Felicity kept her eyes on his. Oliver licked his lips once more, but he still didn’t say anything.

Felicity cocked her head and perked up an eyebrow amusedly. “You okay?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied without hesitation, his voice hoarse. “Are you?”

Felicity remembered the last time she had tried to initiate sex all too well. She had been driven by her insecurities back then and tried to push herself to have sex with Oliver out of fear that he was growing impatient with her. Depression was a weird thing, making her believe in absurd thoughts. Thinking about that night now, Felicity knew it had been stupid. She knew that Oliver would put her wellbeing above his sexual needs anytime. As much as sex was an important part of their marriage, there were more important things connecting them to each other.

“Haven’t been better in months,” Felicity replied, her smile widening. She looked at him openly, pouring all her love and all she felt for him in this moment into the way she looked at him. She knew that he was hesitating because of what had happened months before when she had pressured herself to do something like this. He needed her reassurance that this was her wanting this and she willingly reassured him. “I want you, Oliver.”

Her voice was only a whisper, but it didn’t miss to prove that this was what she wanted. Oliver didn’t need to be told twice. After a moment of hesitation, just a second that he took to scrutinize her face, his lips were on hers again. While his hands moved from her cheeks down over her neck and arms to her hips, Felicity straightened up onto her tiptoes and leaned against Oliver. Her fingers explored his scarred back, feeling the rough tissue under her soft fingertips. When she scratched her fingernails over the burn scar on his lower back, Oliver moaned quietly and Felicity used the opportunity to stroke her tongue into his mouth.

She felt like her whole body was on fire. Oliver’s hands were moving over her back, only grazing her butt occasionally, and never sneaking under the shirt of his that she wore. She could only imagine how his rough fingers would feel against her heated skin. Thinking about it alone, elicited a low moan from her. Oliver swallowed it thoroughly.

His fingers made quick work of the tie on the front of her pajama pants and tugged them down her legs. As soon as they pooled around her ankles, Oliver put his hands to her hips and urged her backwards. When the back of her knees hit the mattress, she thought Oliver would just push at her hips and make her fall onto the bed like he did so often. Instead, he took hold of her hips, turned them around and sat down on the mattress, tugging her into his lap.

Felicity could feel Oliver’s hardened cock against the inside of her thigh and immediately tried to urge closer to him. With the big baby bump in the way, it was impossible to get as close as she wanted, though. Her belly was pressing to his stomach, making it impossible for her to press her hips to his and feel his erection against where her core was already pulsing with need to be filled by him. Releasing a low groan, Felicity parted her lips from his and leaned back. She kept a hand on his knee to steady herself as she moved her core against his erection. Even through the thin fabric of her panties she could feel how hard and hot he was. She moaned out, closing her eyes and enjoying the sensation.

“Felicity,” Oliver grunted, moving his hips against hers.

She loved when he said her name like that, like it held the answer to all his prayers and saying it was all he really needed. She loved when he said her name, no matter how he said it, but this might be one of her favorite ways. The longing and need in his voice made her stomach tighten in the best way possible.

Oliver tightened his arms around her body and scooted up the bed, taking her with him. When his back hit the headboard of the bed, Felicity slumped forward a little. Her hips moved back, her chest moving forward at the same time. Quickly, Oliver put a hand to the back of her head, tangled his fingers with her hair and pulled her towards him. Their lips met in a searing kiss. They both wanted and needed each other even more now than seconds ago.

Felicity tried to move her hips against Oliver’s once more, but there was no way to press her aching core against his hard cock without parting her lips from his. She sighed in frustration because as much as she wanted to feel him hot and hard between her legs, she didn’t want to stop kissing him. Oliver seemed to get where her frustration was coming from, probably feeling quite frustrated himself as his hips thrust up but never got to reach her sex they way he wanted to. He put his hands to her hips once more and with the strength of his arms he lifted her from him and turned her around. Felicity lips parted from him in surprise when he sat her back down in his lap and pulled her back against him. Her back was pressed to his front now, his legs between hers. Felicity wiggled her hips and moaned out in pleasure when she felt his cock against her core, only her panties in between.

“Oh god, yes,” Felicity breathed against Oliver’s lips before pressing hers back to his. She didn’t care that her neck complained under the strain of bending back so far that she could kiss him. Finally, she could continue to devour his lips and yet move her hips against his and increase the friction between them.

They continued kissing for a while. Felicity’s hands tightened in his wet hair to keep him from pulling away even though he didn’t show any intention of wanting to do so, while Oliver’s hands roamed all over her body, touching her naked thighs and stroking her rounded belly over his shirt she was still wearing.

Oliver’s hard cock pressed against her opening and her clit through the thin barrier of her underwear. She could feel the muscles of his chest moving whenever he thrust up against her. His strong arms were wrapped around her body, holding her close and cradling her to him. She was all embraced by him. Felicity felt intoxicated by Oliver. His smell, his taste, the feeling of his skin against hers – everything sent her nerve endings on fire.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered.

“What?” Oliver asked, hearing the need in her voice. “What do you want?”

“More,” Felicity pressed out between clenched jaws.

The friction of Oliver’s hard cock rubbing against her most sensitive parts through her panties was increasing her pleasure more and more. Felicity arched her back, bringing her core even closer to Oliver’s erection. She moaned out and Oliver swallowed the sound eagerly. Eventually, he broke the kiss to tug the shirt she wore up her body and discard it on the floor carelessly. Immediately Oliver’s hands roamed all over her body. Felicity moaned with pleasure dropping her head back against his shoulder and angling her head back to capture his lips with hers once more. When Oliver’s fingers moved towards her breast, Felicity quickly pushed them back to her hips, wordlessly signaling that her breasts were too sore.

Oliver’s fingers snuck between her thighs, dancing along the hem of her panties. His fingertips graced the inside of her thigh, making a jolt of pleasure rush through Felicity’s body. She was just about to lace her fingers through his and moved his hand to where her panties were already damp and her core was aching for him when she felt an abrupt movement in the baby bump. She chuckled against Oliver’s lips, not stopping to kiss him.

“What?” Oliver asked eventually, pulling away enough to look at her. There was a content and maybe slightly amused smile on his lips. His pupils were blown wide with lust as he took her in, a gentleness in the way he looked at her that almost took her breath away. “Why are you laughing?”

“Addie has a hiccup,” Felicity replied, lacing her fingers through his on her hip and putting it to her belly, so Oliver could feel the rhythmic movements. She turned her head to look at his face. “Can you feel it?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a smile. He ducked his head and kissed her shoulder. “I can feel it.”

For a long time, they just stayed like that. Felicity closed her eyes and rested her head against the side of Oliver’s neck. She focused on the feeling of his hand stroking over her baby bump and the warmth and gentles of his touch could almost lull her to sleep. It was so comfortable and wrapped up in the warmth of Oliver’s body she felt so safe and protected that sleep would come easily.

When the fingers of his other hand, that rested against the top of her thigh now, moved slightly, though, Felicity felt her tiredness disappearing quickly. She was sitting on her naked husband, just her damp panties separating his hard cock from her aching core.

By now her brain had caught up enough to remember that it had been twenty-three weeks since they had sex the last time. It had been the morning before she had found out about being pregnant with Addie. Thinking about it thoroughly, it had actually been her who had had the fun part of the sex that morning as Oliver had eaten her out. She had promised him to properly thank him later that day, but the news about the pregnancy followed by the months of depression had sucked up whatever lust she could have had.

Anyway, after these twenty-three long weeks without any sexual intimacy, her body was craving for it. It was like her pleasure center had been asleep for months and had suddenly woken up, eager to get working and hungry for its needs to be satisfied. She turned her head and captured Oliver’s smiling lips in a kiss. It started out gentle and slow, appropriate for the moment of enjoying their baby’s hiccup. The kiss grew hotter soon, though.

“Felicity,” Oliver whispered against her lips.

“Mhm,” Felicity agreed, knowing exactly that the tone of Oliver’s voice was supposed to tell her that he wanted to move things along and continue. It had been too long for them to spend time on an extensive foreplay. They could catch up on that the next time. “Just push them aside.”

Oliver moaned into her mouth at those words, his fingers digging into her skin slightly. He thrust his hips up, rubbing his cock against her core. Felicity groaned in response, digging his front teeth into his bottom lip. Oliver’s fingers dug even more tightly into the skin of her thighs. Despite his fingers being so close to where she needed him so much, Oliver’s didn’t push her panties aside yet, though. He just kept rubbing himself against her relentlessly.

When her skin felt like it was on fire – and not the good kind of fire that was more like a warm glow, but the dangerous kind of fire that burnt your skin and left you aching – Felicity eventually reached down and grabbed his length. Oliver tried to break his lips away from her, gasping for breath, but Felicity chased his lips and stroked her tongue into his mouth. She stroked his cock for some time, enjoying the silken softness that covered his hardness. It wasn’t long until she felt her core clenching down on emptiness painfully, though.

“Push them aside,” Felicity demanded against Oliver’s lips. “Now.”

Oliver growled into her mouth, probably turned on by her bossy tone because she knew he loved it when she was demanding in bed. He complied her wishes without hesitation, reaching down and pushing her panties aside. Felicity wasted no time, either, guiding his length to her entrance and pressing the tip to it.

She broke the kiss, pulling back just enough to look at her. Their erratic breaths made their noses bump against each other’s again and again, making both of them chuckle breathlessly. When Felicity slid down a little more, taking more of his length in, their chuckles stopped, though. Their eyes locked, sharing the moment of Felicity slowly sinking down more and more until he was buried in her completely. Her walls were fluttering around his length slightly, already so very sensitive.

For a long moment, Oliver and Felicity just looked at each other. Neither of them moved. Neither of them said a word. They just shared the moment, shared the intimacy between them. Even without the sex, they had been intimate. It had just been in different ways. Yet, now that they were having sex again, Felicity remembered how much she had actually missed this. Sex had always been a way for them to communicate and Felicity was glad that they had gotten back to it.

A smile spread on her lips at that thought and she leaned forward, kissing Oliver gently. This time the kiss stayed slow and loving. Oliver put his hands to her hips, guiding her movements on top of him as they both started moving in harmony. Their movements were unhurried, his cock reaching deep inside of her whenever he thrust up and lowered her hips down on him. Despite the unbearable hunger and need for each other before, they both knew they wanted to take their time now that they were connected like this again.

Oliver broke the kiss, letting his lips travel down the side of her neck. His stubble scratched her soft skin, making goosebumps spread all over her body. Felicity released a low sigh, letting her head fall back to Oliver’s shoulders. She arched her back, making him go even deeper, and just focused on the feeling of having him inside. He slid in and out of her perfectly, hitting just the right spots.

Eventually, Oliver’s lips found hers again. Felicity slid a hand to the back of his neck, playing with the short hair there. They moved in rhythm with each other, exchanging slow kisses and whispered words, for some time. Soon, much sooner than Felicity liked to, she felt her pleasure increasing.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered his name against his lips.

“Same,” Oliver whispered in response, knowing exactly what her breathy whisper was supposed to mean.

When Oliver’s thrusts grew quicker and rougher, telling her that he had been holding back for her sake, Felicity arched her back as much as the baby bump allowed her to. It wasn’t much, but the change in position allowed Oliver to hit just the right spot inside of her that made her gasp for breath. Her toes twitched and her hand tightened around his wrist.

“Right there,” Felicity whispered, squeezing his wrist. “Right there.”

Oliver released a groan. It took all the strength in her to open her eyes and looked at him. She saw the strained expression on his face and slid her fingers from the back of his neck to his chin. Applying gentle pressure, she turned his head to make him look at her. The moment their eyes met, the strained expression faded from his face. The expression in his eyes was still intense, his pupils blown wide and his lips opened slightly.

All it took was one more thrust that hit exactly the spot she needed it to hit for her to fall apart. She fought the urge to close her eyes, keeping her gaze on his face since she knew how much he loved watching her fall apart like this. She didn’t want to miss the moment that he would fall apart, either.

It didn’t take long, just a couple more thrusts until Oliver’s hips slammed into hers once more and came with a grunt of her name. His hips stilled, his seed filling her, causing another little wave of pleasure to run through her.

Felicity’s fingers dug into his wrist even more firmly as she slowly came down from her high. The rushing of blood in her ears eventually stopped and the exhaustion hit Felicity hard. Panting wildly, she let her head fall to Oliver’s shoulder and turned her face, so she could press her forehead against his sweaty neck. She felt Oliver’s lips press against her temple before he rested his chin on top of her head, his stubble getting tangled with her hair and making her smile. His strong arms wrapped around her naked body, holding her to him. For some long moments, neither of them said a word as they were both trying to catch their breaths.

“I’ll go to the bathroom,” Oliver whispered into her ear and kissed the soft spot under her ear. “I’ll be back in a second.”

Felicity yawned, nodding her head. She kissed Oliver’s collarbone before she whispered, “Okay.”

Oliver slid out of her, making both of them groan slightly. Felicity moved to the empty mattress, rolling onto her side and yawning once more. The late our caught up with her quickly and she had to force herself to stay away which was much easier said than done. She didn’t want to fall asleep just yet, though. The hours after sex were always some of the best. She and Oliver would lie snuggled up to each other, telling each other stories in whispered words, and she had something to tell him. She had a surprise in store for him to be exact.

When Oliver came back from the bathroom, still in all his glory nakedness, Felicity turned onto her back, pushed an arm under her head and watched him. Oliver grinned as he played with the wet washcloth in his hands, took off her panties, that were drenched with her arousal, and lifted one of her feet from the mattress to open her to him. As he wiped the wet washcloth between her legs, cleaning her up, he asked, “Enjoying the view?”

“Very much, yes,” Felicity replied with a grin. “You?”

“Absolutely,” Oliver promised. As soon as he had finished cleaning her up, he threw the washcloth into the bathroom and climbed into bed. He snuggled up her front, pulling the blanket over both of their naked bodies. His arms wrapped around her body and pulled her even closed to his warm chest. He kissed her forehead and whispered, “This was an amazing surprise.”

“Thanks for being so patient,” Felicity replied, “and, yes, I know that I don’t have to thank you for that because it’s only natural for you to be so sensitive, but I want to thank you nonetheless. I didn’t feel urged to do anything I wasn’t ready to do or whatever and that really took away from the stress that already buried me.”

Oliver smiled at her halfheartedly and stroke his thumb over her cheek. “I would never urge you to do anything you aren’t ready for.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered. “Thank you.”

Oliver smiled, nodding his head. He probably knew that telling her once again that he didn’t have to apologize wouldn’t lead them anyway. Felicity smiled, resting her head on his bicep and nuzzling his nose. She loved the understanding between her and Oliver. They both knew that the other had their crosses to bear. Oliver’s PTSD had gotten better, but it was still part of his life. Felicity’s abandonment issues had declined over the years since her father had left, but they still snuck themselves into her life every now and then. Then there was the depression that could come back any time, especially at the times of pregnancies. Neither of them had it easy and that was why they had the understanding the other needed.

“Are you as tired as I am?” Oliver asked eventually.

“Definitely, but I have a surprise for you,” Felicity replied, pressing her nose to his shoulder and breathing him in. When she angled her head back, looking at his face, she was him perking up her eyebrows and chuckled at the sight. “Come on, it’s not like I never surprised you with anything.”

“I know,” Oliver replied, “but I was actually planning on a surprise for you.”

“Uh, what is it?” Felicity asked.

“Not going to tell you,” Oliver answered. Felicity puckered her lips, looking at Oliver with a pouting expression she knew he couldn’t withstand easily. He only tightened his arms around in response and shook his head. “Not yet.”

“Fine,” Felicity grumbled.

“Wednesday,” Oliver promised.

“How about Tuesday?” Felicity tried to bargain.

“Wednesday,” Oliver countered.

“I will be patient then,” Felicity replied with a grumble since patience wasn’t really one of her strength. When Oliver bumped his nose against hers, she winked at him, though.

“So what’s my surprise?” Oliver asked.

“I,” Felicity started, tapping her fingers against his shoulder, “organized three weeks of family vacation on Bali for us.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows even more. “What?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I figured we aren’t doing a lot of vacations. Like the few vacations we went on I can count on the fingers of one hand and since it’s going to be difficult once Addie is born and then Emmy starts school and everything I figured maybe now was the right time. The kids can’t miss school, but with the extended spring break of her kindergarten she will only miss a week and it’s kindergarten, so I figured I could convince myself to take her out for a week. I already talked to Ms. Anderson and she said Emmy is a little ahead of most of her classmates anyway and I asked her to mail me everything Emmy is going to miss, so we can catch up on it with her. William can only join us for the last week since there is no way we are taking him out of school, but I already talked to Samantha and him to make sure that he is going to come to Bali, too. You aren’t saying anything. Why aren’t you saying anything?”

Rationally, Felicity knew that he didn’t have much opportunity to say something given her rant, but Oliver looked at her with a weird expression. He actually frowned which really wasn’t the reaction she had expected to come out of this. He was supposed to be happy because they really didn’t have many family vacations and Bali had been a place they had always wanted to go to, but there had never been the right time.

“I am just surprised,” Oliver told her. “I thought now that you are feeling better you’d like to catch up on what was going on in the company a little bit.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Curtis got it everything under control and I think I have worked so much the past year that I can allow myself some time off to enjoy with my family. I mean the project with Wayne Enterprise is running smoothly and I think I should give it some time to progress before taking on something new anyway, so why not take the time and spend some quality time with my family? Or do you think that’s wrong?”

“No, absolutely not,” Oliver replied immediately. “I am happy, very happy.”

Finally, the smile she had excepted spread on his lips. He spread his fingers on her back, warming her soft skin, and ducked his head. His lips brushed against hers gently. Felicity sighed into the kiss, trapping his bottom lip between hers.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted.

Felicity smiled. “Sure. I figured it was a nice idea and a great early gift for our anniversary.”

“It is,” Oliver replied. “Having the whole family going away for the weekend is going to be fun.”

“Yes, absolutely.” Felicity said and yawned. “I am so tired.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed the corner of her mouth. “I suggest you better sleep.”

“Mhm,” Felicity agreed. “Good idea.”

“In the meantime, I will go down there and talk to our daughter a little.”

Felicity smiled, already closing her eyes. “Okay.”

Oliver brushed his lips against hers once more before he crawled down the bed a little and leaned his lips against her baby bump. He nuzzled her skin and started talking to their daughter, who kicked against his lips in response. If it wasn’t for the long day that was behind her, she would probably be unable to fall asleep with Addie’s firm kicks. After the long and exhausting day, she soon drifted off into sleep, though.


	227. Space Camp

“See, Millie? This is a tree.”

Smiling, Felicity made herself comfortable in one the chairs and watched her children. Tommy had been lying down next to Millie on her blanket and was showing her one of the baby books. The little girl was playing with her feet, but her eyes followed Tommy’s finger intently. She hummed around her pacifier in response. Seeing them like that gave her hope that Tommy wouldn’t struggle too much when Addie was going to be born in a couple of months.

“Can you say tree, Millie?” Tommy asked her. Again, Millie’s answer was only a low hum. Tommy laughed in amusement and tickled the underside of his little sister’s chin. Millie giggled in response, letting go of her feet and kicking them against the air instead. Her arms waved up and down wildly. “Try say it.”

“I think it’s a little bit too soon for her to say something yet, Tommy,” Felicity explained. “She is only ten months old.”

“When she say something?” Tommy asked. He rolled around onto his stomach, looking at his mother. “Next week?”

Felicity chuckled. “No, not then either. Maybe around her first birthday.”

Tommy sighed. “That is a long time.”

“I am sure it will pass by quickly. You know, her birthday is only a week after our big vacation.”

“Still,” Tommy replied and sighed once more before he turned back onto his back and continued to show Millie the pictures in the book.

Smiling, Felicity stroked her hand over her baby bump and took a sip of her tea. If it was up to her, time couldn’t pass slowly enough. Admittedly, she changed her mind about that almost on a daily basis, though. One day she would hope that time would pass more quickly, so she could hold Addie in her arms. Then other days the thought of her babies, even the ones who weren’t babies anymore, growing up made her feel terribly sentimental.

A frustrated screech followed by a clattering sound pulled Felicity from her thoughts before she could lose herself in them. Putting her cup of tea aside, she turned her head to look at where Emmy was kneeling on one of the chairs around the dining table. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest, an angry pout showing on her face. Felicity took a look at the homework she was working on, biting her tongue when she saw it was mathematics. As much as Emmy succeeded in school, she really wasn’t a fan of math, even though she usually solved most tasks more or less easily. It seemed like the solutions didn’t come as easily today, though.

“What’s wrong, Sweetie?” Felicity asked her, turning around more towards her daughter.

“Tell Ms. Anderson I am skipping kindergarten and start MIT now.”

Felicity had to bite her tongue to keep herself from chuckling. She reached out a hand and put it to her daughter’s head. Then she pulled her closer until Emmy was sitting on her lap as much as the big baby bump allowed it. Felicity had no idea how it was supposed to grow for another thirteen weeks when she already felt like she would burst if the bump only grew a little. Emmy dropped her head onto her mother’s shoulder and Felicity kissed her head.

“Maybe let’s take a break and then try again later, okay?”

“Okay,” Emmy replied. She wrapped her arms around Felicity’s stomach as much as possible and sighed. “I am tired, Mommy.”

“I know,” Felicity replied, rocking Emmy back and forth in her arms like a baby. “Millie kept us all awake last night, didn’t she?”

“Mhm,” Emmy hummed in agreement.

Felicity smiled, tightening her arms around her daughter. She kissed her head soothingly, never stopping to rock her back and forth. Millie was usually easy to take care of, but she had been running a slight fever the night before which had caused her to cry all through the night. They were all kind of tired because of that today. Oliver, Emmy and Tommy had temporary gone down and watched TV since sleep had seemed impossible anyway.

“Mommy?” Emmy asked, angling her head back to look at her mother.

“Yes, Baby?” Felicity asked back.

“When’s daddy coming home?”

As if he had only waited for his name to be said, Felicity heard the key in the lock turning, telling her that Oliver was back home after picking up William from the station. Felicity kissed Emmy’s head once more before she explained, “I think daddy’s home now.”

“I go and say hi to William.”

As soon as she had said it, she was already carefully sliding down from her mother’s thighs and running to the front door. Only a couple of seconds later she came back, sitting on her older brother’s hip resting her head on his shoulder. Her eyes were threatening to drift shut and Felicity was sure it wasn’t going to take much longer until she would be asleep.

“Hi, Felicity,” William said.

“Hey,” Felicity replied, giving him a smile. “How was your week?”

“Boring,” William replied with a chuckle and shrugged his shoulders. “Yours?”

“Eventful,” Felicity explained, biting down on her bottom lip.

Her week had indeed been eventful. First, she had had sex with Oliver after a long time of not having sex. Then Millie’s little fever had kept them up all of the last night. Now, she knew Oliver still had a surprise for her in store. He had promised to reveal it today once he had picked up William from the station. Hence, he would have to reveal it to her now.

Since nobody said anything, though, Felicity rubbed her hands, put on a smile and asked, “So… what about my huge surprise?”

Felicity was like ninety-five percent sure that it had to do with Addie’s nursery. The renovations had been finished at the beginning of the week and Oliver had spent a lot of time in the annex of their home, an annex she hadn’t been allowed to see yet. During the entire renovations, Oliver had told her she couldn’t go there because of her safety and that the noise would just not be good for her. Now, he was telling her to wait until everything was prepared. That was why she was pretty sure that his secret had something to do with the nursery upstairs and honestly, she couldn’t wait to find out.

Oliver smiled at her and nodded towards the door. “Come on, we will show you.”

“Yes,” Felicity said excitedly, clapping her hands like a little girl who had just gotten the toy she had always wanted. She couldn’t help it. Presents and surprises always made her very excited, especially when they were coming from Oliver or the kids. They always prepared the best surprises.

“Tommy, do you want to come, too?” Oliver asked.

“Yes,” Tommy replied without hesitation.

He put the book aside and quickly jumped to his feet. He ran to Oliver and reached out his hands until his daddy picked him up in his arms. Millie turned around onto her stomach and released a discontent cry.

“Okay, then I am going to take Millie,” Felicity suggested. She went over to her baby girl and lifted her into her arms. Immediately, she went silent. Smiling, Felicity kissed her daughter’s head and then turned to Oliver. “So, you are going to lead the way or what?”

Oliver chuckled quietly. “I am.”

When Felicity passed William to follow Oliver, she saw that Emmy had already fast asleep. Smiling, she shook her head and followed Oliver upstairs, William right behind them. They walked past their bedroom and the children’s bedrooms to the annex of the building. Felicity frowned slightly when she saw the three additional doors. Rationally, she had known already that Oliver most have expended their plans for the annex given how long the renovations had taken and how much place they had added upstairs. Yet, it surprised her in some ways.

“Down, please,” Tommy asked when Oliver stopped in front of the first door. Oliver let him down and Tommy gripped his daddy’s hand in his tightly. “Now we show mommy, right?”

“So, you know what daddy’s been hiding from mommy?” Felicity asked her son.

Tommy nodded proudly. “Yes.”

Felicity looked at Millie. “Did you know, too?”

Millie giggled in response, infecting Felicity immediately.

“We all knew,” William explained to her. “And we all kind of helped.”

“Oh, I guess I will have to thank all of you with pizza for dinner then,” Felicity replied.

“Pizza,” Emmy mumbled in her sleep.

Felicity chuckled and turned to Oliver, perking up her eyebrows. “Can I see it now?”

“Well, this is just the first part,” Oliver explained, “the less spectacular one.”

“Stop wasting time and show me,” Felicity demanded with a chuckle.

Oliver bit down on his bottom lips slightly, making Felicity smile. She loved how flustered he got when he was about to do something sweet. He looked at Tommy, nodding to the door. Immediately the three-year-old stepped forward and wrapped his hands around the door handle.

“Now, Daddy?”

Oliver nodded. “Now.”

With that, Tommy opened the door and stepped into the large nursery. Felicity followed him inside, taking everything in. The room was colored lightly. There was a fluffy, beige carpet on the light wood floor. The walls were painted beige, too. Colorful flowered were painted at the wall the nursery was standing at. At the opposite wall, a comfortable armchair was placed, stuffed animals inside. A picture was placed right over the changing stable, stating _In a field full of roses, she’s a wildflower._

“You are provoking it with statements like that, you know?” Felicity asked, shooting a look back over her shoulder at Oliver.

“You think?” he asked, hunching his shoulders and pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Kind of, yes,” Felicity replied with a low chuckle.

“Well, I saw the picture and I just felt like it spoke to me,” Oliver told her.

Smiling, Felicity took in the rest of the room for a moment before she turned back around to Oliver fully. She adjusted Millie’s position on her hip before she approached Oliver. When she leaned against him, his arms wrapped around her waist.

“I really love this,” she explained and pecked his lips. “Thank you.”

A relieved smile spread on Oliver’s lips. He released a breath Felicity hadn’t known he had been holding and pecked her lips, being considerate of his teenage son standing nearby. “I am glad you do.”

Felicity put a hand to Oliver’s heart and stroked her hand over his chest for a moment to wordlessly thank him once more. She and Oliver exchanged a long gaze, sharing this moment with each other. This was where their baby girl, Adelaide Grace Queen, would grow up. This was also, at least most likely, the last nursery they would set up until they would furnish a nursery for their first grandchild. Then again, they had thought the same when they had set up Millie’s nursery, so she guessed you never knew.

“What’s that frown?” Oliver asked, putting his thumb to the crease between Felicity’s eyebrows and stroking it away gently.

“I just thought about how is actually the second time we set up a last nursery.”

Oliver rolled his lips into his mouth and pressed them together, nodding slowly. There were so many things they had actually thought they were over and done with until Addie had surprised them. It was almost a little weird how she had crossed all their plans.

Emmy’s soft snoring pulled them out of the moment. Everyone awake chuckled and Tommy ran towards William to tickle the soles of his older sister’s feet. Emmy only released  a grumble, kicking Tommy’s fingers away and snuggling up more against William.

“Come here, Tommy. Let Emmy sleep,” Oliver suggested and lifted Tommy back into his arm when his son was back at his side. He kissed his cheek and looked back at Felicity. “Ready for the next part of the surprise?”

Felicity smiled. “I can’t wait.”

Oliver nodded towards the door. “Then let’s go.”

All six of them went over to the next door. Tommy leaned down from Oliver’s arms and opened it. Oliver and Tommy stepped in first, Felicity with a squealing Millie and William with Emmy following him.

“Wow,” Felicity said, taking a look around the space-themed playroom. “This is amazing.”

“I hoped you’d like it,” Oliver replied.

Felicity looked around the room, looking at the little chairs that looked like rockets and the planetary system that served as lamps. There were so many little details that Felicity needed several minutes before she had taken in everything and even then, she was still speechless.

“Dad said you always wanted to go to Space Camp,” William stated after a while.

Felicity turned around to him, nodding her head. “Yes, I would have loved to. My mom couldn’t afford it, though.”

“That sucks,” he said.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “It did, but I understand. We just didn’t have the money.”

“Must have been hard to understand as a child,” William said. He walked over to the couch and lay Emmy down there carefully. Immediately she rolled onto her side and snorted softly.

“Impossible,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “I locked myself in my room and didn’t talk to my mother for at least two weeks.”

“I understand that,” William explained. “I kind of wanted to go to Space Camp, too, when I was younger.”

“Really?” Oliver and Felicity asked in chorus.

“Yes.” William shrugged his shoulders. “I thought it was cool. I ”

“Well, I thought I should offer to buy you a car or something for your birthday since this room isn’t exactly a present for you like it is for your siblings, but, hey, I it seems like this room is enough after all,” Oliver teased.

“A car?” William asked. “Seriously?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Your mom said it’s fine and Felicity agreed, too.”

“Well, just so we are clear, it’s going to be a small car,” Felicity explained quickly. “One that is safe and that makes a good first car, nothing too spectacular. It’s also going to be a used one, no new one. We are not giving away brand-new Porsches for first cars.”

William shot a look towards Oliver, who nodded his head, confirming that his first car had indeed been a Porsche.

“Thanks in advance,” William said, smiling all over his face. “That’s amazing.”

“We can talk about this more later, but now I have to show Felicity the actual surprise,” Oliver said. He kissed Tommy’s cheek and asked him, “Do you want to show William and Millie your new book about the stars?”

Tommy nodded and Oliver let his son down on the floor. The young boy ran towards the bookshelf, grabbing one of the books. Meanwhile, William took over Millie from Felicity.

“So just the two of us?” Felicity asked Oliver, cocking her head.

Smiling, he reached out his hand for her and pulled her into his arms as soon as she put her fingers into his. He kissed the tip of her nose and confirmed, “Just the two of us.”

Oliver laced his fingers through her and led her out of the playroom and towards the third added room. He pushed her in front of him, keeping his hands on her hips. He ducked his head to kiss her shoulder before he whispered into her ear to open the door, his lips brushing against her lobe as he spoke. Felicity turned her head back over her shoulder and kissed Oliver’s lips in silent thanks before she bit down on her bottom lip and opened the door.

She stepped in, taking in the room. Just like the nursery, this home office was kept in light colors. The large windows allowed a splendid view over their garden. Light wood, glass and fabric were manufactured to furniture. There was a wide desk with five large monitors, three more monitors attached to the wall behind. A small sitting group and kitchenette were added, too.

“This is beautiful,” Felicity said, stepping forward and taking in the monitors. “Are these the new ones we-“

“-just developed at QI?” Oliver asked. “Yes. I asked Curtis to take care of the tech here to make sure you had the best equipment. The walls are also soundproofed, so you shouldn’t hear anything of the kids and be able to focus solely on your work here.”

Felicity turned around to him, smiling. “I really love this. Thank you.”

Oliver grinned, shrugging his shoulders. “Admittedly, I felt this was a good idea for egoistic reasons, at least ninety-five percent.”

Felicity chuckled, approaching him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and asked, “So this is much more a surprise for yourself than for me?”

“This room, definitely,” Oliver agreed, nodding his head. “I mean I know you mentioned that you are planning on doing more of the admirative work from home, but I felt chanced were higher if you had a room where you could really work at. Since we turned the last home office into William’s room, you didn’t really have a good place to work at from home. I guessed it was about time to give that back to you.”

“Well, it will definitely make working from home easier,” Felicity explained and kissed his chin. “Thank you.”

“And now we will come to the actual surprise for you,” Oliver stated.

“I thought this was the surprise.”

“No, this was the present I made to myself,” Oliver corrected and kissed her nose. “Wait a second.”

He let go of her to walk towards the door. Felicity watched, feeling her heart swelling with happiness. She had really planned on working more from home. She loved her job and she didn’t feel guilty for working. Her work offered jobs for thousands of other people and she hoped that working in STEM made her a little bit of a role model for other girls and women. Yet, she didn’t want to do that to the disadvantage of her children. Doing the administrative work from home given that she could easily do it from here seemed to be a good compromise to her. This home office was going to make it a lot easier.

When Oliver let down the automatic shutters, Felicity cocked her head at him, a grin spreading on her face. She wiggled with her eyebrows. “I like the way you think, Queen.”

Since Felicity had gotten back into mood for sex a couple of days ago, they had had sex several times. After the first time, that had been driven by need to finally rejoin each other, they had taken the next night to make love slowly. They had rediscovered each other’s bodies, taking time to worship every inch of each other’s skin.

Oliver chuckled. “Hold that thought for later,” he told her.

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. If Oliver didn’t want to christen this room, which given that their children were wide awake in the room next door seemed utterly absurd to her on second thought, then what was he planning on doing? And why was he lowering the shutters?

The room was already dipped into semi-darkness when Felicity’s eyes widened at what she saw. There had to be fluorescent painting at the walls and the ceiling.

“Is that-?”

“The galaxy,” Oliver confirmed. He stepped behind her, wrapping his arms around her from behind and kissing the side of her neck. “I know you couldn’t go to Space Camp, but I hope this is a little bit of a restitution. It’s a galaxy just for you.”

Felicity smiled, feeling goosebumps spread all over her skin. It was amazing how Oliver remembered so many things she had told him, took up on her feelings and made sure to make her relive her joy or give her the joy she might have missed.

“This is amazing,” Felicity whispered, leaning back against Oliver’s chest.

She could feel him smiling against her shoulder. “I figured you had to be jealous of Tommy when he got the stars. Of course, I know that Space Camp is about a lot more, but maybe when you’re here you can at least pretend that you’ve gotten the chance and become an astronaut.”

Smiling, Felicity turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed his lips. “Thank you for this. I am really happy.”

The light of the painting was enough for her to see him smile back at her. He bumped his nose against hers playfully. “Glad to hear that. I know you would have been a great astronaut.”

“I would have been,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head.

“But I am kind of glad you ended up at the IT department of QC.”

“Me, too.”

“You might have been a great astronaut, but you are also an amazing business woman, the best partner in crime possible and a great wife and mother.”

Felicity smiled. She knew he was right, but hearing it from Oliver still meant a lot to her. She snuggled closer to him, resting her head against his shoulder and closing her eyes with a sigh. Going to Space Camp and dreaming of a future as an astronaut would have been great, but looking back now she didn’t know if she’d chose a life like that over the life she had now. Maybe her life hadn’t gone as planned, but she kind of didn’t want to have it any other way anymore.


	228. The snip

“Sleep tight, Baby.”

Felicity cradled Millie’s head and put her into the crib. She stroked her hand over the baby’s stomach for a couple of seconds, making sure she wouldn’t wake up again. When Millie stayed unmoving, she eventually turned around and left the nursery, closing the door behind her quietly.

She took a short look into Emmy’s room, smiling when she found her oldest daughter sleeping soundly. She closed the door to her room again and moved on to Tommy’s room. Biting her tongue to suppress a chuckle, Felicity stepped into her son’s room when she saw him lying across his bed, his blanket wrapped around his hip but barely covering his body. She pushed him back into bed and adjusted the blanket on top of him to make sure he was safely tugged under it.

“Night, Buddy,” Felicity whispered and kissed Tommy’s forehead, stroking her fingers through his hair. Tommy grumbled something in his sleep, turned around and continued sleeping.

As Felicity walked out, she considered switching off the special light that looked like the stars, but she knew he slept better with the light on. Felicity decided to leave the light on. She just closed the door behind her and released a low sigh at being done with her last round of checking on the kids. Now she could finally fall into bed and fall asleep. She was so tired and her back and the soles of her feet hurt terribly. She had no idea how was supposed to get through another twelve weeks of pregnancy. She felt like her body was going to give out any second as it was.

Massaging the small of her back, Felicity strolled into the bedroom.

“Hey,” she whispered, seeing Oliver was still awake.

“Hi,” Oliver replied, smiling at her over the edge of the tablet. “Are the kids all asleep?”

“Yes.” Felicity nodded her head. “They are all soundly asleep.”

“That’s good.”

Felicity chuckled, taking off the one of Oliver’s hoodie jackets she had been wearing and letting it fall to the floor. She tugged down the hem of his shirt she was wearing, stroked her hand over her rounded stomach, where the shirt was actually spanning a little, and sat down on the edge of the bed with a long sigh. She put her hands to the small of her back for a moment, massaging the uptight muscles there.

“Everything okay?” Oliver asked her.

“I’m fine,” Felicity reassured him. She scooted over to his side of the bed, put one leg between both of his and rested her head against his shoulder, closing her eyes. It almost felt like the tiredness was crushing down on her. She pushed her nose against Oliver’s shoulder and breathed him in before she answered sleepily, “Just the usual issues of the third trimester.”

“Aching back, tired feet, the feeling of being a second away from bursting?”

“Exactly,” Felicity replied with a chuckle as she made herself more comfortable in Oliver’s arms. She put a hand to his chest, smiling at the feeling of his steady heartbeat beneath her palm. When Oliver kissed the crown of her head, she sighed contently. Not opening her eyes, she asked, “How much longer are you going to read?”

“I can stop if the light bothers you,” Oliver offered.

“No, it’s fine.” Felicity yawned. “You just don’t usually read this late.”

“I found an article that interested me and now I am searching the web for more information on the topic.”

Felicity opened her eyes, about to ask what had caught his interest and if there was anything she could help with. It wasn’t like Oliver’s google-skills could even come close to her computer skills. If there was something he wanted to know more about, she was sure that she could find the things he wanted to know about more easily. When her eyes caught the headline of the article Oliver was currently reading, though, she frowned.

“Vasectomy?” She angled her head back to look at Oliver, her frown deepening. “Really?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders, wrapping an arm around Felicity’s body and spreading his fingers against the small of her back. Felicity sighed since the warmth of his hand eased the pain in her back a little. She smiled at Oliver, rubbing her hand over his heart in silent thanks. Yet, she continued to look at him, making it clear that even though she was relaxed, she still wanted to talk.

Eventually, Oliver shrugged his shoulders once more. “I think it’s time, you know?”

“To get the snip?” Felicity asked.

Oliver screwed up his face at the expression. Then he chuckled and shook his head, answering, “We didn’t get to have a conversation about permanent protection after Millie was born because we were still bathing in baby-bliss when we learned about Addie. I just figured maybe this time we should make sure that we won’t take a risk for another shocker like this little nugget here.”

Felicity nodded slowly, wordlessly agreeing with him. She had thought about permanent or at least more permanent forms of protection after Millie had been born, too. She had actually started thinking about it before she had been born already. They had both agreed that Millie should have been their last child. It was hard to imagine a life without Addie now, even though she wasn’t born yet, but she hadn’t been exactly part of their plan. Anyway, as happy as they were about their little surprise, taking some measures to make sure that this time their plan wouldn’t be crossed that easily could be a clever idea.

“Our life is crazy. Our sex life is crazy,” Oliver added when Felicity didn’t say anything and she chuckled, nodding her head slightly. Oliver smiled. He put his fingertips to her cheek, stroking his thumb along her cheekbone. “We don’t want any other babies, do we?”

“No, we don’t,” Felicity replied firmly.

If anyone would have told her that she would have five children one day, she would have laughed. Apart from the fact that she hadn’t really been sure if she wanted children until she had gotten married to Oliver, she had always thought that if she’d have children, then maybe one or two if she got lucky. Admittedly, she had been pretty sure that she’d end up as a single mother. She hadn’t really trusted that someone might be willing to stay with her and their child. Her father had not allowed her to built trust like that into men.

“Then I guess it’s a good idea. We have four perfectly healthy children and this little sweetheart is going to be just as healthy I hope,” Oliver stated, moving his palm over Felicity’s baby bump. “Let’s not risk our luck, especially given the problems with your health. Our family planning is finished and even though I think we could handle a sixth child if something happened, why risk it?”

“Yet, this is really a big step,” Felicity said. “Are you sure you want that?”

“We both agree that five children are enough for us,” Oliver replied and shrugged his shoulders, “so kind of setting it in stone is less of a big step than it might seem.”

Felicity puckered her lips. “Well, I could have a tubal sterilization, too. You don’t have to be the one to do this.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned over and pecked her lips. “You have taken care that our children are perfectly protected before they enter this world. Now, it’s my turn. Besides, I read that the male sterilization is less risky than a female sterilization, so…”

“And you are sure that you won’t regret this?” Felicity asked. “I mean… it’s quite the step.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “We agreed that we don’t want any more children, so there is nothing to regret for me. If you are unsure about that, though-“

“Hell, no!” Felicity replied with a chuckle, shaking her head. “No more babies. I haven’t been surer about something in a long time. It’s just… If it’s just because of the depression, you don’t have to do this. I mean it’s kind of my problem and-”

“It’s our problem,” Oliver objected.

Felicity rolled her eyes slightly. “Yeah, I know, but-“

Oliver interrupted her with a kiss. His lips captured hers gently, moving against them. He stroked his tongue into her mouth, massaging hers for a moment, before he broke the kiss. He gently nuzzled her nose before he pulled away.

“If you are okay with it, I’d like to do it.”

The certainty in Oliver’s voice washed away all her doubts. Giving him a smile, she nodded. “Yes, of course.”

“Good,” Oliver replied. He pecked her lips once more. “I already checked for a urologist here in Starling. Dr. Watson seems to be very good at what he’s doing. I guess I am going to arrange an appointment to talk about this and prove if this really is a good possibility and then we’ll see.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “Okay then.”

“Okay then,” Oliver repeated.

It was still weird in some ways, Felicity thought to herself. If people learned that Oliver Queen suggested to have a vasectomy, they probably wouldn’t trust it. The fewest people really knew who Oliver was, though. They mistook him for the boy he used to be. She knew she shouldn’t be surprised that he suggested something like this. Family always came first for him.

When Felicity yawned, Oliver chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose. “You should sleep.”

“Mhm,” Felicity hummed in agreement. “I really should.”

Oliver switched off the tablet and put it to his nightstand. When he turned back to her again, he kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose and finally her lips. “I am going to have a short conversation with our little girl if you don’t mind.”

He was already scooting down the bed, but Felicity held on to his shoulder and kept him from moving any further. Oliver frowned at her in confusion.

“You are not going to talk to her,” she told him.

“Why?” Oliver asked, his frown deepening.

“Because you will only wake her up,” Felicity told him. “All the kids are asleep now which means that mommy can finally sleep, too. You are not going to wake up Addie.”

“I am sure I will not wake her-“

“She always wakes up when you are talking to her and then she’s dancing around inside of my womb and guess who can’t sleep then, either?” She asked. “ _Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!_ Me.”

Oliver rolled his lips into his mouth, suppressing an amused laughter. He quickly cleared his throat. “Just saying goodnight?”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him slightly. “You have twenty seconds.”

With a quick movement, Oliver propped himself up onto his forearms and crawled down the bed to level his face with her stomach. He pushed the shirt she was wearing up his body a little and moved his lips against her skin as he spoke.

“Hi, Sweetie,” he whispered. “You know, mommy and I can’t wait to meet you. We are already so excited, and so are your siblings. And once you are born, you can be awake at whatever hour you want. Daddy is going to stay up all night and make sure you are properly entertained, I promise. As long as you are still inside of mommy, it would be nice if you slept when she is sleeping, though. Mommy needs her rest, so she can have a lot of sex with daddy and-“

When Felicity playfully punched his shoulders, Oliver chuckled.

“It was sweet until the last part,” she told him, very much amused about his words. When she felt Addie kicking, Felicity rolled her eyes with a sigh. “And now, she’s awake.”

Oliver puckered his lips. “Well, if she’s awake already, maybe I can talk to her a little longer.”

He gave her the sweetest look, gazing at her with his deep blue eyes pleadingly until Felicity rolled her eyes and gave in. There was just no way she could withstand him when he looked at her like that. Oliver blew her a kiss before he focused back on her baby bump. His warm hand moved against her skin gently as he spoke to their daughter. Smiling, Felicity watched him, carding her fingers through his short hair and massaging his scalp.

She didn’t know how long it took –probably a lot longer than it would have taken if Addie wasn’t dancing around and slightly maltreating her insides – but eventually she fell asleep to the soothing sound of Oliver’s voice.


	229. Little Oliver

When Felicity heard the keys turning in the lock, she rolled her lips into his mouth and pressed them together. She couldn’t say why it was, but she felt like she was on the verge of bursting out into laughter when really there wasn’t anything funny about this. She took in a deep breath, trying to take back control over herself. She was like a hundred percent sure that her imagination as well as the weird dreams she had had these past nights were trying to make this a lot funnier than it actually was.

She switched off the tablet and put it to the couch table before she got up and turned towards the door. When Oliver stepped into the living room, walking with his legs spread slightly and taking only small steps to keep his sweatpants from pressing against his groin, Felicity had to bite her tongue. Once more, she took in a deep breath to keep herself from bursting out into laughter. Her imagination really hadn’t make it look that much worse than it was in reality. She had actually imagined Oliver walking just like that whenever she had thought about it.

“How are you feeling?”

She did her best to hide her amusement behind a sympathetic smile. Biting down on her tongue, she watched Oliver sitting down on the couch with a pained expression on his face. He released a groan before he let his head sink back on the headrest of the couch and closed his eyes.

“I’m fine,” he said eventually, pressing the words out between clenched teeth.

Felicity sat back down on the couch next to him, resting her elbow on top of the backrest and bit down on her bottom lip. She put her hands to his shoulder comfortingly. Oliver dropped his head to the side, snuggling his stubbled cheeks to the back of her hands. He released a content, slightly sleepy sigh.

“I’m fine,” he repeated once more. “I just need to catch some rest.”

Felicity nodded slowly. When Oliver had been to the consultation for the vasectomy last week, she hadn’t thought that he’d come back with an appointment only a couple of days in the future. She had thought it would take more preparation for the doctors as well as for Oliver. Deciding to have a vasectomy had been a big step, even if Oliver seemed to have made it right before heading unto bed like the decision to change your toothpaste, and doing it had had to be an even bigger one. Felicity had been sure that Oliver would have had to mentally prepare for it, but apparently it was a lot easier for him than she had made it out to be.

Then of course there had been the worry of all her plans being crossed by the soon appointment. They were leaving for their vacation in a couple of days and Felicity needed Oliver as well as little Oliver in best form for that. She had plans that demanded that her husband and his little friend were fit and it was about a lot more than just sex. Of course, the sex was part of it, but really only a part. Her plans had much higher goals.

Luckily, the doctor had suggested that Oliver took it easy for three days and took a pass on sex for a week. After that, they were fine to go again. It would take a little longer until the vasectomy worked as protection, but given that Felicity was pregnant and sex was kind of safe anyway, she didn’t mind much.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” she asked him.

“No,” Oliver replied. “I’m fine.”

Felicity watched Oliver’s face. He looked tired but kind of content. His eyes were closed, his facial expression relaxed. Smiling, Felicity moved even closer to him. She pulled her hands out from under his head and cradled his head to her chest. With a sleepy sigh, Oliver snuggled up to her. His ear came to rest right over her heart, one of his arms wrapping around her back, the other hand stroking over her baby bump gently.

No more babies after Addie, Felicity thought to herself. She didn’t regret the decision as thx hadn’t planned on having another baby anyway, quite the opposite actually, the finality of it still seemed to be only really settling now. Whatever amusement she had been feeling about the way Oliver had walked or just the weirdness of the situation was soon replaced by seriousness.

“Did I already thank you for doing this?” Felicity whispered, stroking her fingertips through his short hair. “Because I am really grateful.”

Oliver angled his head back to look at her, shooting her a gentle smile. “I told you there is no reason to thank me. This was the best solution.”

Felicity smiled. “Did you ever think you’d do something like this?”

“A vasectomy?” Oliver asked with a frown.

“Yeah,” Felicity replied and chuckled, not missing the weirdness of the question, “kind of.”

She couldn’t say what it was, but for some reason that question had come to her mind. Didn’t men think of their potency as a nature-given gift that had to be protected at all cost, so they could show it off and prove they were the alpha male or something? Felicity was always the first to tell people, including Oliver, that he wasn’t the man he used to be before the island, so this was not about thinking that he wanted to impress other women or something. Yet, it was still a fact that Oliver was quite the guy you would think of when thinking about an alpha make.

“Probably not.” Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I also didn’t think I’d have five children and spend my nights running around in leathers, catching criminals.”

“Your life is crazy.”

Oliver chuckled. “Our life is crazy and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Well, a little less craziness, at least every once in a while, would be nice, so we could catch some rest,” Felicity told him with a mild smile, “but you are right. All in all, I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way, either.”

Oliver smiled at her for a moment before he lowered his head to press a kiss to the top of her breast and then snuggle back up against him once more. Felicity kissed his head and gently stroked her fingers through his short hair.

Oliver was right. Their life was crazy, too crazy at times for sure, but would she have really wanted it any other way? She loved her nighttime job and she loved having this big family. After growing up with a single mother, being married and having five kids on top of having a sister-in-law, a kind of stepsister and like the best big brother she could have ever wished for was kind of great.

“Where are the kids?” Oliver asked after a while.

“Emmy went to Deepa, and Laurel picked up Tommy and Millie to get them some ice cream, so I can baby you all you want,” Felicity explained. Oliver grumbled something Felicity couldn’t understand, but she could feel him smiling against her skin nonetheless. “Don’t say you don’t want to be babied.”

“I want to be taken care of like I deserve,” Oliver replied with another grumble.

Felicity chuckled. “Oh, of course you do. You and little Oliver need to be taken such good care of.”

Oliver leaned his head back and looked at her with a mocking frown. “Hey, he just took quite the sacrifice for our sex life. You could be a little nicer to him.”

“Awww,” Felicity made and patted Oliver’s thigh. Her hand was high enough on his leg to make sure he knew exactly where her hand was supposed to be, yet not close enough to cause him any pain in case the pain meds didn’t work the way they were supposed to. “Poor, little baby.”

“Come on,” Oliver complained and pinched her side playfully. “You could call him big Oliver at least for today.”

Felicity chuckled. “Big Oliver, really?”

Oliver narrowed his eyes at her mockingly. “Don’t you dare insult him today.”

Felicity rolled her lips into her mouth, trying to look ashamed. When Oliver grinned, she ducked her head and kissed him gently. “Maybe for today.”

“Yeah?” Oliver asked.

“But just today,” Felicity emphasized.

“The doctor said I need at least three days of being taken care of.”

“Three days… I think I can do that for you,” Felicity hummed, massaging his scalp gently. After a short pause, she added, “For both of you.”

Oliver gave her a look. Yet, when Felicity chuckled, so did he. Smiling, Felicity kissed him once more, longer this time. When their lips parted, she kissed the corner of his mouth and rested her face against his cheek. With a low sigh, she closed her eyes.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked and stroked his fingers up and down her forearm.

“Mhm,” Felicity replied. “I am just glad we will go on vacation soon.”

“It was a great idea,” Oliver agreed.

“I have a lot of great ideas.”

“Indeed.” Oliver nodded his head slowly. With a sigh, he rested his chin on her breasts and looked up at her. When Felicity perked up her eyebrows, he smiled. “What great idea do you have for the rest of the day?”

Felicity puckered her lips. “I think the first thing we should do is catching some sleep.”

Oliver chuckled, stroking his hand over her baby bump. “Is Addie giving you a hard time?”

“No, she has been nice the last few hours, just not last night.”

Oliver lowered his head to the bump and whispered, “What did we talk about? You are a nice girl while you are still growing inside of mommy. Once you are here and daddy is the one to take care of you, you can keep me up all night. We are letting mommy sleep, though.”

Felicity huffed out a breath, stroking her fingers through Oliver’s hair nonetheless. She whispered, “In a field full of roses, she’s a wildflower.”

Oliver grinned at that. He had bought and framed a picture stating exactly what she had just whispered and hung it up in Addie’s nursery. When Felicity had seen it, she had complained that Oliver was provoking their youngest to become a rebel. Admittedly, all their children kind of were rebels. They were all little, wonderful wildflowers.

“Come on, let’s go upstairs,” Felicity suggested, “before I will fall asleep here and wake up with an aching back tomorrow. Well, a more aching back.”

“Yeah, no chance of me carrying to anywhere for now,” Oliver explained, already getting up and taking her hand. Felicity narrowed her eyes at Oliver. She knew him well enough to know that he would never complain about her weight, especially not during pregnancy, but she also loved mocking him about it. When he noticed Felicity’s look, he quickly added, “At least no carrying you anywhere in the next three days. You know, rest and all.”

“Saved by the last second,” Felicity told him with a wink before she got up and patted his thigh, “but I guess it’s ‘little Oliver’ again then.”

“Oh, come on!” Oliver complained mildly.

Chuckling amusedly, Felicity took the first steps towards the stairs. Soon, Oliver’s arms wrapped around her and pulled her back against his broad chest. He ducked his head and kissed the side of her neck.

“I love you,” he whispered.

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over his. “I love you, too.”

She looked back over her shoulder, finding Oliver’s intense gaze already on her face. Her smiled widened until Oliver captured her lips in a gentle kiss. Hand in hand they strolled upstairs into their bedroom to nap like planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am half way through with the chapters 201 to 250. Hence, it’s time to start thinking about the future of the story. Like promised, I’d like to include you more into decisions. To do that, the first thing I need to know is what you would like the main conflict to be. I can come up with ideas for all of this. Maybe, I will use several of the ideas you voted for (let’s say of the top 3). 
> 
> I would also love to hear your ideas about other chapters (other than the main conflict). This can include ideas for whole chapters as well as ideas about part of chapters, side storylines about side characters or whatever you would like to see. 
> 
> I can’t promise to make everything work, but I’d try to do my best. :)
> 
> If you are interested and want to answer, [here‘s the survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/u/0/d/e/1FAIpQLSe8cxudkLvurLC1Nhazoz5HqLlSn0kPNGlQqrb2YHWD5RWHug/viewform?usp=sf_link). Probably opened for multiple replies until July 31st.  
> 


	230. For the baby sisters

“I like it here.”

With a content smile on her lips, Emmy leaned back against her father’s chest. She rested her head against his shoulders, lifting her hands to frame his face and stroke her fingertips through the short stubble. Oliver ducked his head a little and winked at her, and Emmy beamed back at him in response.

“I like it here, too,” Tommy said eventually, looking up from the picture he was drawing and adjusting his position by pushing his feet under his butt, so he sat higher. Then he let the pen fall to the tabletop and grabbed his glass of ice tea with both of his hands. “And I like the ice tea.”

“It’s a great one,” Oliver replied and took a sip of his own ice tea as he looked at his son, smiling at him. “Do you want another one?”

Tommy shook his head, continuing to draw. Oliver leaned back with a low sigh, wrapping his arms around Emmy and pulling her closer against him. Emmy dropped her head against his shoulder. Oliver turned his head and looked over at the ocean.

He felt like he couldn’t thank Felicity enough for planning this vacation on Bali. The last years had brought a lot of stress for them. Apart from their already stressful nightly activities, two pregnancy depressions and raising four kids really hadn’t made anything easier. Then Felicity had been leading and improving the company which had taken a lot of work, too. There had barely been time for them to go on vacation or maybe they just hadn’t taken the time. Either way, they had needed something like this.

“Daddy?” Tommy asked after a while, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“What’s up, Sweetie?” Oliver asked back.

“When’s Millie’s birthday?”

“The week after we come back home,” Emmy replied and turned her head back over her shoulder to look at Oliver. “Right, Daddy?”

Oliver nodded. “Right. First there is daddy’s and mommy’s anniversary and then-“

“What’s that?” Tommy asked. “Annivary?”

“An-ni-ver-sa-ry,” Oliver said slowly.

“It’s like the birthday of mommy’s and daddy’s wedding,” Emmy explained and looked at Oliver once more. “Right?”

“Right,” Oliver replied with a smile and a nod of his head. “How do you know?”

“Mommy told me.”

“Of course, she did.” Oliver smiled. “Why do you ask about Millie’s birthday, though, Buddy?”

“We need to buy her a present,” Tommy replied. “For her birthday.”

Oliver nodded. “Absolutely. Why don’t we wait until mommy is awake after her nap, so we can ask her to come with us?”

“But then Millie is coming, too,” Emmy told him. “She can’t see her present before her birthday.”

Oliver nodded. “You are absolutely right.”

“Can we go now?” Tommy asked.

“Oh, yes!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly. “Let’s go now, Daddy! Please.”

Oliver chuckled at the pleading expression in both of his children’s eyes. He nodded towards the boardwalk with its little shops. “Let’s take a look at the presents Bali offers for your little baby sister.”

“We buy a present for the baby, too?” Tommy asked as he closed his coloring book and handed it over for Oliver to take.

“Yes, a plushy animal for the baby to have,” Emmy agreed with her little brother, nodding her head furiously. “Like I have my pink giraffe. Maybe she can have a purple elephant or something.”

“A blue Pegasus.”

“But, Tommy, the baby is going to be a girl!” Emmy replied.

“Woah, who said that?” Oliver asked, looking from Emmy to Tommy and back at Emmy again. He and Felicity hadn’t told anyone that the baby was going to be a girl. Felicity had wanted to keep it a secret, and Oliver had agreed. Telling the kids would have made the information spread like wildfire. “Why do you think that?”

Emmy grinned cheekily. “I heard you and mommy talking and you called the baby ‘sweetheart’ like you call Millie and me sometimes, but never Tommy.”

“Maybe mommy and I just don’t know whether it’s a boy and a girl, and that is why we call the baby ‘sweetheart’.”

Emmy cocked her head, giving him a look like only Felicity could do usually. Oliver had to bite his tongue to keep himself from chuckling. Emmy was so much like her mother that it never failed to amaze him. Yet, there were moments when Felicity would swear that Emmy was just like him. He could only guess that that had to mean she had the right amount of both of her parents.

“The baby is going to be a baby girl, right?” Emmy asked.

Oliver hesitated. He had promised not to tell anyone about the baby being a girl, but now that the kids knew already, he felt it didn’t make any sense to lie to them. Emmy and Tommy looked at him expectantly, their big, blue eyes.

“Don’t tell your mom I told you,” Oliver said with a sigh. Emmy clapped her hands happily, while Tommy made a face. Oliver cocked his head at his son. “What’s wrong, Buddy? You don’t like the idea of having another sister?”

“Does it have to be a girl?” he asked.

Oliver smiled sympathetically. Tommy had had so many troubles when Millie had been born, the fact that he was now only complaining about the baby being a girl felt like a huge step forward. What three-year-old would prefer a baby sister over a baby brother? Yet, he felt sorry for his son. Having to be put through having another sibling when he had just gotten used to the last one that had joined the family couldn’t be easy.

“I think it does,” Oliver said, nodding his head, and Tommy sighed in response. Oliver puckered his lips. “Bad?”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “The next is a boy then.”

Oliver mumbled to himself how he had never thought his little boy would actually want a fifth sibling after everything he had been through when Millie had been born. Then he took the last sip of his ice tea and clapped his hands.

“Let’s go shopping?” he asked the kids.

“Yes!” Emmy and Tommy replied in chorus.

Oliver grabbed Tommy’s coloring book at the set of pens before he dropped some money on the table and got up. The kids were running ahead, Emmy holding Tommy’s hand in hers tightly to make sure she wasn’t losing her little brother at the boardwalk. Oliver followed a few steps behind them, enjoying how content and happy they were here.

As much as he and Felicity had needed this vacation, he felt the kids had needed it too. They had sensed that something had been wrong with their mother and they had worried about her. The little distraction and the quality family time to spend here was good for them. Besides, Oliver had always wanted to show the kids more of the world. If it hadn’t been for his and Felicity’s responsibilities, he might have actually spent the last years traveling with his loved ones. As long as they didn’t have to go to school, it would have been the perfect opportunity. He probably wouldn’t have met William then, though, so it had probably been better the way it had been.

“Daddy, look!” Emmy suddenly said, pointing at one of the small shops.

Oliver turned his head and smiled at the sight of the baby store. He had thought they would have to leave the beach, but today seemed to be his lucky day.

“Come on, let’s take a look if we find something for Millie and the baby there,” Oliver suggested, nodding towards the store.

When they entered the store, Oliver smiled. The store seemed to be small and intimate, hence, just what he needed. When Emmy was about to run ahead to one of the shelves, Oliver quickly caught her hand to keep her from running. She looked at him with questioning eyes and Oliver gave her a look, making sure she knew that he didn’t want her to run in here. Emmy nodded, so when Oliver let go of her hand, she walked over to the shelf slowly. In the meantime, Tommy reached out his hands for Oliver, so he picked him up into his arms.

“You okay, Buddy?” Oliver asked.

Tommy nodded and whispered, “Don’t want to break something.”

Oliver smiled and kissed his boy’s cheek. “That’s good. Shall we see what Emmy has found?”

When Tommy nodded, Oliver went over to where Emmy was standing in front of the shelf with the stuffed animals. She was looking at the toys so focused that Oliver actually wondered if she even realized that he and Tommy had joined her. He moved his hand over the top of her head and Emmy leaned back against his leg, angling her head back to look at him.

“Did you find something you like?” he asked her.

“Maybe the sheep,” Emmy replied, pointing at one of the stuffed animals.

“You mean this one?” Oliver asked, taking the plush toy from the shelf. “It looks more like a cloud than a sheep, but-“

“No, Daddy, I want the donkey!” Emmy interrupted him.

Oliver put the lamb back into the shelf and took the donkey from it instead. There was barely a face visible under all the grey plush, but once Oliver moved his hand over the stuffed animals face a little, he uncovered two big eyes. The pleading expression in them in addition to the long ears made it the most adorable thing he had ever seen. Well, most adorable apart from his children and a peacefully sleeping Felicity of course!

„That is what you want?” he asked Emmy with a smile and the young girl nodded. Oliver looked at Tommy, playfully pinching his side, when he realized that the boy wasn’t paying attention. What do you think, Buddy! Will your baby sister like this?”

Tommy grabbed the plushy animal and held it to his face. “It’s plushy.”

“So you like it?” Emmy asked.

Tommy nodded his head. “The baby will like it, too.”

Oliver smiled and kissed his son’s check. “Thanks for your help with the decision, Tommy. Day is really happy that you helped.”

Tommy smiled proudly and leaned his head against Oliver’s shoulder. Oliver rubbed his hand over his son’s back and winked at Emmy, who watched her brother and father with a for her quite unusual smile of insecurity. When Oliver reached out a hand for her to pull her closer against him, her smile grew more relaxed, though.

“So, let’s try finding something for Millie, right?” Oliver suggested. “We don’t want to let mommy wait, and I am sure she and Millie want to spend time at our beach today after their nap.”

“Maybe we can-“

“I know what to get for Millie!” Tommy interrupted his older sister.

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Shoot.”

Tommy pointed at something behind Oliver, so he turned around to look at what his son suggested.

“Cool,” Emmy replied. She grinned at her dad. “Can we get that for Millie, Daddy?”

Oliver looked at the zebra rocking horse. Emmy and Tommy had both used the old rocking horse Oliver and Thea had used already. Tommy had used it to exhaustion until it had literally fallen apart right under his diapered butt. Millie was slowly getting into an age that would allow her to have fun with a rocking horse, so replacing it was probably a good idea.

He nodded. “Yes, it’s a perfect gift for Millie.”

“Mom my think so, too?”

Again, Oliver nodded. Yes, I am sure of that. Mommy will love it. And do you two know what else mommy is going to agree over with daddy?”

“What?” Tommy asked.

“You two,” Oliver started and tapped the tip of his finger against the tip of his kids noses, “are the best older siblings your two baby sisters could have wished for.”

“Tommy, me and William,” Emmy corrected.

“Right.” Oliver smiled and nodded. “Let’s pay and then get back to mommy and Millie, yes?”

“Yes!” both kids agreed in chorus, making Oliver chuckle.

“Good, then let’s do this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven’t yet, please check out [this survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe_b0pGm4RAOp646D1rxr8A039lhIbyfqKyrHwgXQZYVAPRxQ/viewform?usp=sf_link) and help me decide which fic I should plot next (and write after _If loving you is wrong_ )


	231. Everything for the family

Felicity woke up to the scratchy feeling of Oliver’s stubble against her shoulder. Smiling, she stretched out her legs and sighed contently when the blanket slid off her and the feeling of the warm sun on her skin made her feel all wrapped up in some comfortable bubble. The feeling only increased when Oliver stroked his hand over her bump and his finger danced along the exposed skin of her hip where her top had ridden up her body.

“Morning,” she whispered with a content sigh falling from her lips.

Oliver kissed her shoulder gently. “Morning.”

Still not opening her eyes, Felicity took his hand and kissed his palm. If there was one thing she had realized and instantly loved about the way Oliver was on vacation, it was how content and unburdened he was then. It seemed like away from Starting, he was a completely different person. It was kind of different now that the demons that had hunted him for so many years weren’t as omnipresent as they had used to be. Yet, Felicity remembered the times it had been different and Oliver had suffered from nightmares almost every night too well to not feel happy about how at ease Oliver was here.

“How late is it?” Felicity asked him, snuggling back against his chest.

“Almost nine,” Oliver replied.

Felicity frowned. “Millie still asleep?”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed in conferment.

“Then why are you awake?” Felicity groaned. “And even more importantly, why do you wake me?”

As considerate as their children were, sleeping in was still a rare thing they allowed Oliver and Felicity to do. Hence, she had long ago promised herself to use every opportunity given to sleep in. Yawning, she pushed Oliver’s hand under her cheek and snuggled her face into his palm. There was no way she was going to let Oliver wake her up more than she was awake already, especially since this was already more awake than she should be.

“I just wanted to tell you that I am heading out for a run.”

Felicity groaned. “Oliver, we are on vacation.”

“So?”

“So, get some rest and sleep in,” Felicity told him and yawned. “Just, god forbit, relax a little.”

Oliver chuckled, his warm breath ghosting over her skin as he did so. “Going out for a run is a form of relaxation for me.”

“And there I thought I had taught you how relaxation work,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “For the record, it means enjoying doing absolutely nothing.”

“My method of relaxation is more like running without feeling like I have to run away from something,” Oliver told her and brushed his lips against her jaw. “I am heading out now.”

“No,” Felicity groaned and kept Oliver’s hand in hers, keeping him from going away. “You can’t leave. The baby wants cuddles.”

Oliver chuckled. “The baby wants cuddles? Really, just the baby?”

“Of course,” Felicity replied smiling to herself. “Who else would want cuddles?”

“I don’t know,” Oliver said, and Felicity could hear the smile in his voice. “It was just a thought.”

She heard the shuffling of the blanket before she felt Oliver’s chest pressing closer to her back. He kissed her cheek gently before he snuggled his face into the crook of her neck Felicity sighed contently at the pleasant feeling of Oliver’s stubble scratching her soft skin.

“What about your run?” Felicity asked.

“Well, the baby wants cuddles. I can’t say no to that.”

“Good to know,” Felicity replied before she drifted off into sleep once more.

 

 

“Morning, Beautiful,” Oliver’s gentle whisper woke her an hour later.

“Morning.” Humming in contentment, Felicity stretched out her tired limbs. She turned around onto her stomach and opened her eyes, seeing Oliver balancing a trey with breakfast on his knees. “Is that for me?”

“No,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “That’s for the baby.”

“For the baby?” Felicity repeated.

Oliver nodded his head firmly. “Addie inspired me to stay in bed for another hour, so I felt she deserved a great breakfast. “

“And how do you suggest she will get that?”

“Since she is not old enough yet, I guess you will have to eat it.”

Felicity sighed dramatically and sat up in bed. “The burdens I take for our babies.”

“I know. It’s amazing,” Oliver replied before he pecked her lips and then held out a croissant for her.

Smiling, Felicity took it from him, dipped a piece of it into the marmalade and watched Oliver as he settled next to her in bed comfortably. “Are the kids awake?”

“Yes.” Oliver nodded and waved with the baby monitor that showed Millie in her playpen and Tommy and Emmy in the background, watching TV. “I think we have a solid half-hour before we need to go back downstairs.”

“That should be enough for the baby to enjoy the breakfast,” Felicity replied and took a bite from her croissant. “Any plans what we should do for the rest of the day?”

Oliver turned onto his side and pushed the hem of Felicity’s top up, so he could stroke his warm hand over the swell of her stomach. Felicity smiled as she felt Addie kicking against her daddy’s hand firmly.

“Well, it all depends on what the baby wants,” Oliver asked answered, cocking his head at her. “Right?”

Felicity grinned. If that was the way this day would be going, she felt this was going to be an enjoyable day. She moved her hand to Oliver’s on her stomach, lacing her fingers through his, and replied, “I think she would like to spend the day at the beach.”

“Well, if that is what she wants,” Olive replied and slid down the bed as far as necessary to kiss her stomach, “then that’s what Addie gets.”

Smiling, Felicity led their joint fingers to where she felt Addie kicking. “I think Addie likes when things are going her way.”

Oliver chuckled. “That’s what we needed, another tyrant to bully us around like Emmy does.”

Felicity joined into his chuckle. “Good thing, you are the stay-at-home parent now, so I can blame you if she turns out to be a tyrant.”

Grinning, Oliver angled his head back to look at Felicity. “I am gladly going to take all the blame.”

“I am going to nail you down on that one,” Felicity replied and leaned forward to brush her lips against his. “I love you, by the way.”

Oliver’s smile widened. “I love you, too. By the way.”

 

 

“Anything more Addie could want?” Oliver asked.

Felicity smiled, looking from her glass of freshly squeezed orange juice, to her right hand with some grapes Oliver had gotten her and finally to Oliver himself.

“Nope, I think the baby’s fine.”

Oliver perked up an eyebrow and puckered his lips. “You sure about that? Because I think she might like to go home like right now.”

Felicity’s smile turned into an amused grin, knowing exactly what he was trying to do. Since he had officially stated that this day was all for the baby, they had been doing whatever Addie had wanted. Well, they had actually done whatever Felicity had wanted since she was officially Addie’s voice. Maybe the kids thought that they were indeed doing what their little baby sister – Oliver had told her that the kids knew about the baby’s sex even if they continued pretending that Felicity didn’t know in front of the children – wanted to do. At least she and Oliver knew the truth, though. Anyway, Addie had decided that they wanted to spend the entire day at the beach and have fun.

Felicity grinned past Oliver at the children. Emmy and Tommy were buried into the sand up to their chins. Millie was sitting in the sand, her legs and butt covered with warm sand up to her hips. Emmy and Tommy grinned happily, while Millie played with the sand on her feet, working on uncovering her toes, but quickly shoving the sand back on top of them when they could be seen.

“Mhm,” Felicity hummed and stroked her hand over her rounded belly. “You might be right. Maybe the baby really wants to go home.”

“Right now?”

“Yeah, like right now,” Felicity replied.

“Well, in that case we really have to go,” Oliver said and quickly got up. “Everyone who isn’t ready to go in like five seconds will be left behind.”

“Daddy, you can’t leave us behind!” Emmy exclaimed.

“We are stuck!” Tommy added.

Millie just giggled happily, forming a fist around some of the sand and throwing it in the air. She released a discontent grunt when it got into her eyes. Unlike her siblings would have done in her position, she just rubbed her hands through her eyes and tried taking care of it herself than starting to cry.

“Well, but the baby wants to go home now,” Oliver replied and shrugged his shoulders, reaching out his hand to help Felicity to her feet. “You aren’t ready to go, so mommy and I will have to go home alone. I am going to pick you up around midnight when the baby is asleep, bye.”

Before Felicity or the kids could have said anything more, Oliver had already wrapped his arm around her waist and tugged her to his side. When he took the first steps away from the kids, Felicity had no way but to follow. She frowned at him before she shot a look back over her shoulder.

“How long do you want to pretend doing this?” Felicity asked.

“What does ‘pretend’ mean?” Oliver asked back, putting on a frown like he had no idea what she was talking about. “We will do this.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Oliver.”

“Felicity,” Oliver replied matter-of-factly. When Felicity kept staring at him, he looked back at her and shrugged his shoulders. “William is getting here by the weekend. Now would be the perfect opportunity for us to have a night full of sex. Since I don’t want to risk that being interrupted, this sounds like the perfect opportunity.”

Felicity chuckled. “Why do I actually think that you’d be capable of something like this?”

“Because we are doing this right now,” Oliver said.

“Oliver,” Felicity said once more, cocking her head at him even more. He kept looking ahead of him stoically, though. Hence, she repeated, “Oliver.”

Oliver looked back over his shoulder once more and Felicity’s eyes followed the direction. They weren’t far from where they had left the kids since Oliver had only taken small, slow steps. Emmy and Tommy were still debating about when their parents were going to turn around, while Millie had now uncovered her legs completely and was crawling after her parents.

“You do realize that Millie is following us?” Felicity asked.

“We will just walk faster and-“

“Oliver, I think the baby wants her siblings to be home when we get there,” Felicity told him.

“Oh, she should have said that earlier!” Oliver stated loudly, but he came to a sudden stop and turned around to Felicity. “You’re sure that is what the baby wants?”

Felicity nodded, puckering her lips. “Quite sure, yes.”

Oliver sighed, “Okay, kids, lucky you! The baby wants you home with us.”

He picked up Millie from the sand and handed her over to Felicity. Immediately the baby snuggled close to her mother and rested her head against her shoulder. Felicity smiled, kissing Millie’s forehead, and watched Oliver grabbing the plastic shovel to dig out Emmy and Tommy who were still giggling amusedly.

“Daddy, can we have pizza for dinner?” Emmy asked Oliver.

“You already had pizza yesterday,” Oliver just replied, making Emmy grumble.

“Mommy, does the baby want pizza for dinner?” she asked her mother then.

Felicity chuckled and winked at her daughter. “I am sure the baby does.”

Oliver shot Felicity a look, but she just shrugged with her shoulders, smiling in amusement. She liked things going Addie’s way a lot.


	232. Felicity's turn

Felicity put her hands to her hips and scrutinized herself from tip to toe in the large mirror. She had bought a new set of lingerie – a simple, white one without any lace or any other extras, just something comfortable for her quite sensitive breasts – and she had put on one of Oliver’s white dress shirts. She hadn’t buttoned it, so her baby bump was sneaking out from under the fabric. With the rolled-up sleeves, she knew Oliver would be turned on the moment he’d see her.

Smiling, Felicity stroked her hands over her baby bump and closed her eyes for a moment. Her heart was beating fast against her ribs. Felicity took in a deep breath, her heartbeat slowing down. Yet, it still pounded firmly against her ribcage as if it wanted to break free from the prison of her bones and right into Oliver’s arms.

“If this is how daddy felt almost eight years ago, I am not surprised with how things went,” Felicity whispered to Addie, enjoying the unborn babies light kicked against the palm of her hands. “I don’t even know why I am nervous. I have nothing to lose after all.”

“Are you talking to me?” she heard Oliver’s voice from the bedroom.

“No,” Felicity replied quickly, releasing a long breath. “Just talking to our daughter.”

“Addie, we talked about this,” Oliver called from the bedroom and Felicity could hear Oliver falling down on the bed. “You can be the wildest, little girl once you are born, but as long as you are still growing inside of mommy, you have to behave.”

Taking in a deep breath, Felicity took a few steps closer to the bedroom and leaned into the doorframe. She smiled at the sight of Oliver lying in the middle of the bed with his eyes closed and a content smile on his lips. It had been a while since he had been this peaceful the last time. Between nights out on the streets, chasing criminals, and trying to tame four children with a fifth on the way, there hadn’t been much time to relax for either of them. They would have to find more time for vacations in the future. With William and Emmy in school it wouldn’t be that easy, but they would manage to do it somehow.

“She is behaving actually,” Felicity explained.

Oliver chuckled, still not opening his eyes. “That makes one of three children.”

“Emmy and Tommy didn’t?”

“Well, it’s not like they misbehaved,” Oliver replied, “but- wow.”

Felicity chuckled at the way Oliver looked at her with his jaw dropped. Even despite the distance between them, she could see that his pupils were blown wide, looking at her with a hunger that made her core prickle with anticipation. She had definitely picked the right night for what she had planned. After spending the entire day in the garden behind the mansion they had rented, playing with the kids and spending lazy time lying around at the pool and enjoying the sun, there was certainly enough energy left for them to engage in some action.

“Like what you see?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

“You know I do,” Oliver replied without any hesitation, and beckoned her to come closer, grinning amusedly. “Come here.”

Slowly, Felicity walked towards him, trying not to look like she was toddling which given her increased weight was a lot easier said than done. She put her smaller hand into Oliver’s and climbed onto the bed towards him, sitting down in his lap and smiling down on him. Oliver sat up and pulled her closer against his chest. Felicity could feel his already slightly hardened cock press to her core through the thin fabric of her panties and the fabric of his sweatpants.

While his hands were slowly sneaking under the fabric of the dress shirt she wore and his fingers spreading on her back, he asked, “Did I even properly thank you for planning this trip yet?”

Felicity puckered her lips, melting against Oliver’s chest with a content hum that almost sounded like a purr. “Thank me, yes. Properly, no.”

Oliver ducked his head to kiss her exposed collarbone. Then he nuzzled the soft skin of her neck, while his hands lowered to the small of her back and spent some warmth to the aching muscles there. There really wasn’t a lot of sexy things about being pregnant, especially not with the forth kid. Aching back, swollen feet and a general lack of agility didn’t make it easy to even feel sexy if it wasn’t for the way Oliver looked at her like he was hungry and she was his most favored food.

“This idea was really great, so thank you,” Oliver whispered against her pulse point before he let his lips travel along her jaw. Gently, Oliver kissed her chin before he continued letting his lips travel along her skin, this time peppering kisses over her cheek until he reached the corner of her mouth. He leaned back a little and cocked his head. “Good enough.”

“Let’s just say that if that is all I get, I swear I am not going to take you with me on the next vacation. You can stay home and clean the house then.”

“I guess I should up my game then,” Oliver whispered, amusement sparkling in his eyes. “Right?”

“Right,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head. “Definitely.”

“Will it help if I take off my shirt,” Oliver asked, narrowing his eyes at her. “You know, seeing muscles and getting to touch them could be a good reward for this vacation.”

“Let’s just say it might be a good start,” Felicity replied and bent forward to kiss the tip if Oliver’s nose. “Not sure it’s going to be enough to convince me of letting you come with us next time, but it’s worth a try.”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s great to know you have still such an intense reaction to my body.”

Felicity winked at him, and Oliver pulled his hands out from under the dress shirt she wore. He grabbed the neckline of his own shirt and pulled it over his head, dropping it to the floor carelessly. He flexed his abs, wiggling his eyebrows at her. Felicity chuckled.

“Really?”

“You can’t say you don’t like it.”

“Oh, listen carefully, Buddy. I don’t like it,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders.

Oliver gasped for breath dramatically. “You can’t say that.”

“I did say it.”

“But you didn’t mean it,” Oliver replied.

“Did I mean it or didn’t I mean it?” Felicity asked with a sigh, holding her hand up and shrugging her shoulders. “Who knows?”

For a long moment, she and Oliver just stared into each other’s eyes. Neither of them said a word. They just continued staring, waiting for the other to give in. Soon, the playful staring contest turned into something else, something more intense, though. Felicity felt her heartbeat quickening and goosebumps spreading all over her skin at the way Oliver looked at her. She could feel him hardening in his pants even more and Felicity couldn’t stop herself from wiggling on top of him to increase the friction.

Immediately Oliver straightened up and captured her lips with his. The kiss was passionate and hot, all teeth and tongue. Whatever playfulness there had been between them before was gone and replaced with heavy need and deep desire.

While Oliver took of the white dress shirt she wore, Felicity moved her hand into his short hair and angled his head back, so she could deepen the kiss. She stroked her tongue into his mouth and against his. Oliver sighed into her mouth, responding to the kiss with just as much passion as she was giving. Once he had dropped the dress shirt to the floor, his hands roamed over her back. Felicity could feel goosebumps spreading on her skin wherever his he touched her. The contrast of his calloused palms against her soft skin never failed to set her nerve endings on fire. Her body tingled with the need for more.

Desperate to feel him, Felicity moved her hips against his. Their lips parted when Oliver thrust up, his hard cock pressing against her clit and making her gasp for breath. Oliver used the opportunity to let his lips travel down the side of her neck. His teeth scraped over her pulse point before his tongue soothed the sting it had left gently.

Felicity could feel herself getting wetter. Her walls were clenching down on emptiness, the need to feel him inside of her increasing more with each passing second. With the baby bump between them, Felicity just didn’t get the friction she needed. Yet, pushing Oliver’s chest down onto the mattress, so she could move forward and feel Oliver where she needed him right now seemed impossible. She was too addictive to the feeling of his lips against her skin.

When Oliver unclasped her bra, she quickly helped him taking it off and used the opportunity of having some room between them to unknot the cordon at the front of his sweatpants and tug the fabric down a little. Oliver wiggled his hips, helping her to take off the pants completely, so there was only Felicity’s thin lace panties and Oliver’s boxers separating them.

As Felicity slid back closer to Oliver and pushed her hand into his boxers, cupping his erection in her hand, he growled. Felicity would have laughed at the sound if it hadn’t sent a deep surge of pleasure through her core. Her hips started moving on own accord, making her slid back and forth on Oliver’s thigh and rubbing herself against him. The friction eased the need she felt, while it seemed to increase it at the same time. Heat rose inside of her.

It took Felicity a moment until she got back control over herself enough to continue what she had started when she had allowed her fingers to sneak under Oliver’s boxers. She squeezed his cock gently, making Oliver growl against her lips and dig his fingertips into her butt. Then, she slowly started stroking him, letting her fingers travel up and down the soft skin that covered his hardness. When she reached the tip, she swirled her thumb over it and smiled with satisfaction.

It quickly disappeared, though, when Oliver thrust up into her hand and the movement made his thigh press right against her clit. Felicity gasped for breath. She tried to pull away and catch her breath, but Oliver held her to him and swallowed the sounds of pleasure that fell from her lips.  

“Need you,” Felicity whispered against his lips. “Now.”

Oliver nodded against her lips and quickly pushed her hand away from him, so he could take off his boxers. Felicity climbed off his thigh and took of her panties in the meantime, so when their bodies pressed back to another, they were both naked and ready. Their lips met in a gentle kiss. The hurry and desperate need of before were gone for the moment. Back was the gentleness and the need to savor every second.

Felicity framed Oliver’s face with her hands and stroked her fingertips through his short stubble. Oliver sighed into their kiss, catching her bottom lip between his teeth and biting down softly. Felicity hummed contently and let her hands travel down his chest before she moved them back up to his shoulders and gently pushed until Oliver kissed her lips one more time and then lay down.

Oliver looked at her with so much love in his eyes, it almost made her heart jump right out of her chest. Felicity lifted herself off Oliver, so she was kneeling on the bed, hovering over him. She reached behind her until she could feel his cock. She grabbed hold of him and positioned him at her entrance that was already wet with her arousal. Locking eyes with him, she sank down, taking him in.

Once she had sunken down on him completely, Felicity stilled. She sat on top of him unmoving and just watched him while she was enjoying the moment. His cock filled her perfectly, stretching her inner walls just the right way. She could feel them fluttering around him. It was amazing how even after eight years of relationship having sex sill felt so special.

Felicity moved her hands further up Oliver’s chest until they almost rested against his shoulders. She lowered her chest onto his as much as the big baby bump allowed her to. Oliver stroked his hands up and down her thighs. Just like Felicity, he stayed unmoving. Only his hands traveled along her skin. She stroked her thumbs along a scar at his collarbone.

Felicity didn’t know how long it continued like that. It could have been only seconds as well as hours. Being with Oliver like that always made her lose any feeling for time which she guessed was only a testament to how close they were and how special sex still was to them.

Eventually, she started moving back and forth slowly. She just rocked her hips on top of Oliver’s without ever lifting herself off him. His thick cock pressed against her inner walls just the right way, creating some friction without letting their pleasure grow too much too quickly. Oliver’s hands traveled from her thighs to her hips and helped guiding her movements, knowing she would get tired easily with the additional weight of the pregnancy.

Her movements stayed unhurried, while Oliver continued not moving at all. Gazing into each other’s eyes and never losing contact, Felicity continued moving back and forth on Oliver. Despite the slowness and subtleness of her movements, their breathing got erratic soon. Moans of pleasure left their lips as their bodies rubbed against one another. Felicity felt goosebumps spreading all over her skin, and she could feel in the way Oliver tightened his grip on her while simultaneously stroking his thumbs against her skin, that he could feel it, too.

As more time passed, Oliver thrust up shallowly, moving just as subtly as Felicity did. Yet, the extra movement applied some additional friction that quickly heightened her arousal even more. It wasn’t long until she felt a drop of sweat building in the back of her neck until it was thick enough to roll down her spine. When it reached Oliver’s fingertips that were resting low on her back as he was still helping to guide her movements, he took one hand away from her hip to let his fingertips follow the path the drop of sweat had taken down her back.

When Oliver dug his heels into the mattress and thrust up a little more firmly, Felicity rested her head back and released a strangled cry. Her fingernails dug into his shoulder, and she moved her thighs closer to Oliver’s legs. She was tighter around him that way which allowed her to feel his hot, hard cock inside of her even more intensely. It made her flutter around his length.

Felicity knew she was close. She could feel it in the tension that spread in her body and that tingling feeling in the tip of her toes. She knew it was only a matter of moments until she’d fall apart, and given the way Oliver’s abs were flexed, she knew he was close, too.

“Oliver,” Felicity moaned out, digging her fingernails even deeper into his skin to try and get a grip on herself. She had come to Bali with a plan and she needed to implement that plan now. She had worked so hard on it and put so many thought into it. It needed to happen. She needed to make it happen. “Oliver-“

Before she got to say what she needed to say, Oliver thrust up particularly hard and sent her over the edge. Her body spasmed as the pleasure chased through her body. Every inch of her filled with lust and love. She rested her head back and closed her eyes as she enjoyed the sensation, and it made a strangled cry leave her lips.

While Oliver’s thrusts were growing more erratic, his pleasure almost at its peak, Felicity rid out the last waves of her orgasm. Once the waves started to cease, she opened her eyes and looked at Oliver’s, whose eyes were already fixated on her face. Her inner walls clenched around his She moved a hand to his cheek and scratched her short fingernails through his stubble. Oliver’s hands tightened around her hips, encouraging her to keep moving, until his pleasure overtook him. Arching his back, he released into her, and it made another spasm run through her body.

Once the tension had left her body, Felicity let herself fall into bed next to Oliver. They both groaned lowly when he slipped out of her and sought out each other’s closeness immediately. Felicity snuggled up against Oliver’s chest and he wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her safe and sound against him. They lay in bed quietly as they were both catching their breaths. Felicity tried to take in some deep breaths to calm the erratic beating of her heart and the loud rushing of blood in her ears. A feeling of utter content filled Felicity and spread into every cell of her body until-

“Oh frack!”

Oliver chuckled, angling his head forward to look at her. “Oh frack? That’s a new reaction to us having sex. What exactly am I supposed to take from that?”

“It wasn’t supposed to end like that,” Felicity groaned. Squeezing her eyes shut, she hit her head against Oliver’s hard shoulder a few times.

“Then how was it supposed to end?” Oliver asked back, and she could almost hear the frown that she saw on his face when she looked at him. Oliver perked up his eyebrows.

“Well, I had a plan,” Felicity told him, tapping her fingers against his chest. “I had a really good and important plan and you ruined it because you and your little friend distracted me.”

Oliver grumbled low in his chest. “He’s not little.”

Felicity turned onto her back with a sigh, letting her hands travel over the baby bump. This was not how she had planned things to go, but she guessed she should have known that it wouldn’t work the way she had wanted it to go. She was just too focused on the moment and everything she was feeling when having sex to go through with her plan. She still had no idea how Oliver had managed to do it and he hadn’t even tried to in the first place.

Smiling sympathetically, Oliver rolled onto his side and propped his head up onto his hand to look at her. He moved his forefinger from the top of her chest down between her breasts and over her baby bump where he circled Felicity’s popped out belly button until she had no choice, but to laugh at the tickling feeling. Immediately Oliver lowered his head and kissed her swallowing her laughter eagerly. Felicity sighed against his lips, stroking her fingertips through the short hair at the nape of his neck.

“What’s been your plan?” Oliver asked her, leaning back just enough to look at her. Felicity could feel his breath ghosting over her skin and it elicited goosebumps all over her chest. “Your really good and important plan?”

Felicity sighed, pulling the blanket over her chest and looking at Oliver. “I wanted to propose to you.”

There was silence for a beat of a second before Oliver asked, “What?”

Felicity released a quiet laughter and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. “I wanted to reenact your proposal to me.”

“What?” Oliver just asked again.

With a low sigh, Felicity turned onto her side, facing Oliver. He put an arm around her waist and rubbed his warm hand over the small of her back where he knew it pained her because of the additional weight of the pregnancy.

“Well, you proposed to me seven years ago. Twice,” Felicity said with emphasis. “Then you proposed to me again when I was pregnant with Tommy and we had just gotten through my first pregnancy depression. I felt like it was my turn.”

The expression on Oliver’s face was unreadable for a moment before she asked, “And you wanted to reenact my first proposal to you despite all the time I told you I am not that happy that this question just slipped out of me like this?”

“It’s still the first time you asked me, and hence it’s the only one that counts.”

“So, you decided to ask me just like that?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a sigh, “and I totally failed it.”

“And when did you start planning this?”

“In January when Thea and Roy got married,” Felicity answered. She grinned. “I figured it’s been a while since we got married the last time.”

“And that’s why you invited William?”

“I invited William because he is part of the family and I wanted him here with us.” Frowning, Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver. “You are asking a lot of questions for someone who was just proposed to.”

A smile tugged at the corners of Oliver’s lips until it spread all over his face. He tapped his fingertips against the baby bump until Addie started kicking against them eagerly. Felicity would have rolled her eyes about Oliver waking their little girl, but she was unable to. Instead she smiled back at him, waiting for him to say something.

It was weird how her heartbeat quickened and she was holding her breath as she waited for him to answer. It wasn’t like anything would change when he answered one way or the other. They already were married. Yet, here she was, nervously expecting his answer.

“Technically, you didn’t really ask yet,” Oliver told her with a smile. “You just said that you wanted to propose. You didn’t actually do it.”

Felicity chuckled. She knew if she was in his position, she’d say the exact same thing. Hence, she put her hand to his heart and smiled at him.

“These past years since I met you, my whole life was turned upside down for the better,” Felicity stated. “First, you let me join in on your crusade and with what we made of that, helping people in need, you gave my life a greater purpose. Then somewhere along the way I fell in love with you, and you managed to open up my heart in a way I didn’t think it was possible, not after everything I had been through with my dad and Cooper and Michael Foster. Yet, you managed to do it. You managed to give me this feeling of love and safety and the feeling of being able to really be myself. I love you and I love the life we have and the family we created. I know we have our ups and downs, but at the end of each single day, no matter how hard, I know that my life is better with you. I know I am happier with you. I don’t ever want to be without you. That is why I want to ask you, Oliver Jonas Queen, will you please marry me again to reinforce the promise we gave each other a couple of years ago?”

The smile that spread on Oliver’s face made a wave of warmth run through Felicity’s body. It infected her immediately. Her lips widened to such a wide smile that her cheeks almost hurt from it, and she was barely able to get herself to stop even when Oliver’s lips were on hers only a couple of seconds later.

“So that’s a yes?” Felicity asked between two kisses.

Oliver nodded, capturing her lips in another long kiss. “Yes, absolutely.”

She hadn’t expected that he’d turn her proposal down. Just like Felicity loved him like she had loved him all these past years – or maybe it had grown even more since they had gotten together, probably even – she knew Oliver felt the same way about her. Yet, hearing him say that he was going to marry her again just made her heart jump out of her chest joyfully.

“Everything’s prepared. You just need to show up and be handsome,” Felicity said against Oliver’s lips, barely getting the words out as Oliver was still ravishing her lips.

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed in agreement. “I can do that.”

He didn’t seem to care much as he was already busy pulling the blanket off her. His hand traveled from her hip to her knee. He pulled her leg over his hip and turned onto his back, taking her with him. Felicity already felt him hardening between her legs and released a moan low in her chest.

“Maybe I get to ask you this time,” she stated and kissed him once more.

Felicity could feel him smile before he whispered, “If you do, I am going to assure you already that my answer is going to be yes again. A thousand times yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * * *
> 
> **In case you missed my message:**  So much cool stuff happening in the next three six (now five) chapters of Time for a story!
> 
>  **Also:** Just set up some follow-up questions for the chapters 250 to 300 in Time for a story in case someone is interested: [HERE](http://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fdocs.google.com%2Fforms%2Fd%2Fe%2F1FAIpQLSffZMz13G0CVP9y6W8IFOSdrq2h57G-g4hHXoa-JcySYivLYQ%2Fviewform%3Fusp%3Dsf_link&t=M2NlMzEwMzI3YmNkOTNkZjc1NTdjMTgzOGFlNjE0NzZmMDEyMmVkYSxYQzZkZXZFaQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AFb7Mw7wC2_ihECPO4vVJdQ&p=http%3A%2F%2Fsmkkbert.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F163764653630%2Ftime-for-a-story&m=1)
> 
> * * *


	233. Three's the charm

Smiling, Felicity sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked her hands over the baby bump. With a long breath falling from her lips, she closed her eyes.

It was weird how even after years of being married to Oliver, the thought of renewing their vows still made her quite emotional. It wasn’t like anything would change if they tied the already tied knot once more. Yet, knowing that they were both making this choice again, both of them choosing each once more, made her heartbeat quicken.

Some might say that getting married again after only a couple of years of marriage instead of after half a century or something wasn’t much of a big deal, but Felicity disagreed. Wasn’t it as least as valuable that they chose each other again now that it wasn’t too late for them to call it quits and end it before they did everything they did only because it was routine? At least Felicity felt that way, and who cared what anyone else would say, right?

“Are you alright?”

Gasping for breath, Felicity turned around and chuckled when she saw William standing in the door with his hands pushed into the pockets of his suit.

“Sorry, I was just…” Felicity gestured around her head and smiled. “Everything alright?”

“Yes,” William replied immediately, nodding his head. “Dad just left with Emmy, Tommy and Millie. I suggested that I stay here and take you to the beach. I mean I could also walk you down the aisle if you’d like that.”

William hunched his shoulders, looking at her with a hesitant expression on his face before he lowered his eyes to the floor and shuffled his foot. It was weird, Felicity thought to herself. Whenever she thought William couldn’t look more like his dad – and she had thought that a couple of times since she had gotten to meet the boy – he did something to prove her wrong.

“I would love that,” Felicity replied eventually, “if that’s okay for you.”

When William lifted his gaze to look at her, his entire face was taken over by a wide smile. He nodded his head. “Yes, that would be nice.”

“Great,” Felicity replied, “so that’s decided.”

“Yeah.” William nodded slowly. “Thanks for asking me to come to Bali with you by the way.”

“That’s never been a question,” Felicity replied matter-of-factly. “You are part of the family. Of course, you are coming to the family vacation with us. I am sorry you couldn’t come with us from the start, but school is first.”

William nodded. “I know.”

Felicity smiled, and they chatted some more until it was time for the two of them to head to the beach where they knew Oliver and the rest of the kids would already be waiting. She linked her arm with William’s as they walked through the garden behind the mansion and to the beach behind it.

“You look beautiful by the way,” William told her.

Felicity smiled. “Thank you.”

“Who walked you down the idle on your original wedding?”

“Nobody,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, remembering back to the intimate ceremony and reception they had had though compared to the wedding they’d have today their wedding back then had been almost crowded. They had kept all their weddings small, only inviting the people closest to them. This was without any doubt the most intimate of their three weddings with just the kids around. “I wanted to ask my mom, but at the end I decided to walk down there all by myself. I am glad I have you with me now, though. Talking to you helps easing my nerves.”

“You are still nervous?” William asked incredulously. “This is already your third wedding, right?”

“And always to the same man,” Felicity replied, “without getting divorced. Yet, it always feels like the first time.”

“Sounds weird to me.”

“Well, I know it sounds cheesy, but the truth is that it’s probably love.”

William chuckled. “Cheesy indeed.”

When they saw Oliver, Emmy, Tommy and Millie at the beach with the marriage officiant Felicity had organized, both she and William fell silent. Felicity felt her heartbeat quickening as they continued their way towards the rest of the family. Oliver was standing next to the officiant, looking at them. Emmy and Tommy were standing close to him, while Millie was sitting in the sand and shoving hands of the white sand between her legs and onto the white dress she wore. The sight warmed Felicity’s heart and she tightened her hand around William’s forearm slightly.

The moment they were close enough to the others, so Felicity could lock eyes with Oliver, she felt all nervousness fading away. Her body filled with safety and warmth which was the usual feeling that wrapped her in whenever she was with Oliver. She remembered very well that it had been the same when they had gotten married the first time. There had been no doubt back then and there was no doubt now.

“Mama’s beautiful,” Felicity heard Emmy whisper when William gave Felicity away to Oliver. “Right, Tommy?”

From the corner of her eyes, Felicity saw her little boy nodding his head. He didn’t say a word, but the amazement in his big, blue eyes was enough for her to know that he meant it.

“You look stunning,” Oliver whispered and kissed her cheek as he took her hand into both of his.

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered back and took in a deep breath.

She had chosen a simple Empire-style dress for the wedding. The long skirt hugged her curves loosely. The top of the dress was made of white lace and a thin glitter belt ran around her chest right under her breasts. All her wedding dresses had been quite different and Felicity was sure that if they decided to get married a forth time, it would be a completely different style once more.

Once William had taken his place next to his siblings and had lifted Millie onto his arms, the officiant started with the ceremony. He said a few words about Oliver and Felicity and their life together, things Felicity had emailed him when she had asked for someone to officiate this new wedding. Felicity looked in Oliver’s eyes the entire time, smiling at him and enjoying the way his thumbs rubbed over the back of her hands.

“You decided to write your own wedding vows?” the officiant asked eventually.

“Yes,” Felicity replied and nodded her head. With a smile on her lips she reached into her bra and pulled out the piece of paper she had hidden there, biting her tongue at the way Oliver’s eyes sparkled at that. Knowing that giving him the chance to say something would only result in him saying something that would be highly inappropriate for their children’s ears, she held out the paper for him. “Like it’s our tradition, we decided to write the vows for each other.”

Oliver smiled back at her, reached into the pocket at the inside of his suit jacket and held out a paper to her, too. They took the papers from each other without saying something or breaking eye contact. Only when Felicity beckoned for him to start, Oliver lowered his gaze and unfolded the paper. He read over the words she had written down for him quickly, his smile widening with each word it seemed. When he lifted his eyes back to hers, they were full of love and honesty. Felicity knew that even though it was her words he was going to say to her, he’d mean each word.

“Felicity,” he said, his voice hoarse with emotions, and her name alone was enough to make tears well in her eyes. “Today, for the third time, I am giving you the dearest promise one loving soul can give to another. I vow to offer you all my love and all my support in everything life will put us through. I vow that, no matter how hard the times, I will be your dedicated partner in life. I vow to be your home, the place you will always feel safe and loved where you never have to fear that being yourself won’t be enough. I vow you to have faith in you and in us when our way is easy but all the more when it’s hard. I vow that if we have to face adversity – and we both know we will with the life we lead – we will never have to face them alone because I vow to lean on you whenever I need it and let you lean on me why you need it. It’s been seven years since we said our vows the first time. I want to give you a vow for each year our marriage lasted so far. These have been six. Now there’s a seventh. I vow that I will spend the rest of my life the way I have spent the last seven years, being a devoted husband and father. I love you, Felicity.”

Felicity felt a tear slipping from the corner of her eye and was about to wipe it away, but Oliver was quicker. He lifted his hand to her cheek and caught the tear with his thumb, wiping it away. Even if she herself had written these words, except for that last sentence, hearing Oliver say them with such firmness and such conviction, still made her feel unbelievably emotionally. She sucked in a deep breath.

Oliver just smiled at her and eventually nodded towards the piece of paper in her hand. Felicity nodded and unfolded it. She looked at Oliver’s handwriting without reading a single word he had written down for her to say. She knew if she read them already, she’d start crying and wouldn’t get out a single word.

Gathering herself, she took in a deep breath and started reading out, “Oliver, I promise to always be your best friend, your companion and your lover, the person you can lean on and trust in. I promise to be your partner in parenthood and your ally in whatever conflict you will have to face. I promise to be your greatest supporter and yet your toughest challenger. I promise to enjoy adventure with you as much the quiet moments. I promise to stand by you when you’re content as well as when you’re disappointed. I promise to support the best of your ideas as well as your mischief. I promise to tell you when I am mad at you and yet give my best to forgive you. This is my sacred vow to you, my equal and partner in all parts of life.”

After she had read the words in silence once more, feeling the depth and truth sinking into her chest, Felicity looked up at Oliver. She smiled at him through the tears in her eyes.

“This is my sacred vow to you, my equal and partner in all part of life,” Felicity whispered once more. “I love you so much.”

Oliver released a shaking breath, squeezing the one of her hands he was still holding. When Felicity folded the paper and tucked it away in the neckline of her dress, she put her free hand into Oliver’s other hand that was already waiting to hold her fingers. He kissed the knuckles of both of her hands and smiled at her joyfully.

“Now the rings please,” the officiant said.

Tommy stepped forward, a proud smile on his lips, and lifted the pillow with the rings. “Here.”

“Thanks, Buddy,” Oliver said and took Felicity’s wedding ring from the pillow. Locking eyes with her, he said, “I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of always giving my best to live up to the promises I made you as long as I live.”

Oliver placed the ring on her finger and lifted her hand to his lips to kiss the ring before he allowed her to take off her engagement ring from her right finger, so she could put it back to the left one. Felicity took Oliver’s ring from the pillow then, winking at Tommy as she did so and lifted Oliver’s left hand.

“I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of always giving my best to live up to the promises I made you as long as I live,” Felicity repeated Oliver’s words and just like he had, she lifted his hand to her lips and kissed the ring she had put back onto his finger where it belonged.

“Now that you have given each other the promise of love and faithfulness once more in front of the eyes of your children, I pronounce a new beginning in your journey through life as husband and wife. Oliver, you may now kiss your bride.”

“Always been my favorite part,” Oliver mumbled as he took a step forward.

Without any hesitation, he put one hand to the back of Felicity’s head and wrapped his other arm around her waist, leaning her back. Felicity felt her head sinking into her stomach at the sudden movement, but it jumped right into her throat the moment Oliver’s lips were capturing hers in a gentle kiss.

Once their lips parted, they pulled the kids that had been applauding them, into their arms for a long family hug. While Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s shoulder, cradled Emmy’s head to her stomach and held a hand to the back of Millie’s back, who was still on William’s arm, she felt one more time how write it had been to renew their vows once more. With all their kids around, even if Addie wasn’t born yet, it had been the right decision. She wanted her children to grow up, knowing what a loving marriage looked like, and she felt celebrating that with them, had been a good idea.

 

“This day was amazing,” Oliver whispered. He moved some of her wavy hair away from her neck and kissed her pulse point. “Thank you.”

With a content sigh, Felicity leaned back against Oliver’s chest and linked her fingers with his that rested on her baby bump. Smiling quietly, she looked at their children who had all fallen asleep by now. William was lying outstretched on the Bali bed, Emmy snuggled up to his back. Tommy was lying on one of the other outdoor couches. Millie was sleeping in her stroller that Oliver pushed back and forth every now and then when the little girl released sounds that made it seem like she was about to wake up.

After the wedding, they had spent the rest of the day in the garden behind the mansion, enjoying cake and other wonderful food around the outdoor fireplace. The kids had fallen asleep one after another. It had been a long day for them, a long and amazing day indeed.

“It’s really been great,” Felicity whispered back. “I am glad we did this.”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed against her skin and moved his lips from her pulse point down to her shoulder. “You know, I figured we should do this more often.”

“What?” Felicity asked, frowning slightly. “Getting married?”

Oliver chuckled. “Vacation. Though… maybe getting married to. I like getting married to you.”

“I like getting married to you, too,” Felicity replied and leaned her head back to smile at Oliver. He kissed her in silent thanks. When their lips parted, they smiled at each other for a moment before Felicity added, “You’re right, though. We need more vacations.”

“Let’s say at least two weeks of vacation each year.”

“Deal,” Felicity said, nodding her head. “We really need to make that happen. You know, I’d like to go to Europe.”

“Then that’s our next destination,” Oliver replied. He kissed her temple, moving his fingers through her hair. “That sounds really great actually.”

“Where would you like to go?” Felicity asked.

“Nowhere we need boats for.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue to suppress a chuckle. She turned her head slightly to look at Oliver and smiled when he grinned in amusement. She rolled her eyes before she leaned her head back against his shoulder once more and closed her eyes. Though it was quite warm out here, being wrapped up into the warmth of Oliver’s body still felt great. It made her feel incredibly sleepy, though.

“I’d go anywhere with you,” Oliver whispered into her ear and pulled her lobe between his teeth, biting down gently. When Felicity groaned tiredly in response, he chuckled. “Hey, you can’t fall asleep before you opened your present.”

“My present?” Felicity asked, opening her eyes and frowning at Oliver. “I get a present?”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed against the side of her neck. “You do.”

“But it’s not our anniversary yet,” Felicity replied. “I wanted to do this on our anniversary, but it didn’t work with school, and Lyla’s due date is next week, so we need to be back for that and-”

Oliver put his fingers under Felicity’s chin to turn her face towards him and kissed her gently, effectively silencing her ramble. When their lips parted, Felicity pressed her lips together and smiled at him. Oliver swiped his thumb over her bottom lip before he leaned over to get a wrapped up gift from the storage under the stroller.

“This was meant to be for our anniversary, but I figured since you gave me this vacation and the wedding, I needed to catch up.”

“You didn’t have to,” Felicity replied, taking the present from him.

“Well, if that’s the case, I am going to take it back until our anniversary,” Oliver said, about to take the present back from her.

“No,” Felicity hurried to say, her hands tightening around the present. “I want it.”

Smiling amusedly, Oliver left her the present and beckoned for her to open it. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip as she slowly unwrapped the present. Receiving presents from Oliver was always one of the best things. He always chose his presents with care. Once Felicity had unwrapped the present, she smiled at the album she held in her hands. When you had enough money to buy whatever you want, being given a gift that no money could buy was always the best.

“Just for the record, there are some of my favorite photos in there and it physically hurt to say goodbye to them,” Oliver explained, “but I know you will take good care of them and I just wanted you to see yourself and our family through my eyes.”

Felicity smiled. Almost reverently, she moved her hand over the cover of the album. She knew that Oliver loved keeping photos to himself. He shared them with her and the kids, but with nobody else. With how public their life already was given Oliver’s parents and their company, he liked keeping some things as private as possible. It was one of the many reasons all three of their weddings had been intimate.

Taking in a deep breath, Felicity opened the album. The first photo was the first he had taken of her after they had gotten together. It had been the afternoon after their first night together. They had spent all day in bed, enjoying that they had finally found their way to each other. Oliver had stated that he wanted to take a photo of them together. Felicity had denied and put her hands in front of her face, feeling like without any makeup and after the night of being thoroughly laid multiple times she wasn’t exactly photogenic. Oliver had taken a photo nonetheless.

She turned one page after the other, looking at every photo Oliver had taken of her or them and later of their family. There were actually photos Felicity was sure she had never seen before. Sometimes, she didn’t even know when he had taken them.

When she turned to the last page, her smile widened even more. There were half a dozen photos of her being pregnant with all four of their children she had carried.

There was one of Tommy and her in partner look, posing the exact same way. She remembered that photo since it had only been taken a couple of days before Millie had been born.

There was a photo of her and Emmy lying in bed together. She had been pregnant with Tommy at that time, not knowing that his sudden birth way only hours away actually.

One photo showed her at the beach, holding Millie and kissing her cheek.

“That’s from Bali,” Felicity said, looking at Oliver with amazement. “When did you do this?”

“When you were napping yesterday,” Oliver replied with a smile. “I wanted to have at least some photos of Bali in this.”

Felicity smiled and looked back at the album. There was a photo of her in underwear, standing in front of the window in their bedroom and stroking her hands over her baby bump. She had been pregnant with Emmy then, only a couple of days away from her birth.

“I look like I am about to burst any second,” Felicity said with a chuckle, tapping her finger against the photo, before she turned her head back to Oliver. “Don’t you think?”

“I think you look beautiful,” Oliver replied. Felicity grunted, but Oliver kissed the side of her neck. “You do.”

There was another photo of her at the beach in Bali. She was lying the water, her baby bump breaking through the surface.

And there was one last photo of her in the shower. The glass of the shower wall was steamy, drops of water running down. Felicity frowned slightly. Did she remember that he had taken that? She had probably realized and not cared. She knew Oliver too well to think that letting him take nudes of her would ever bite her in the ass. That man would rather cut his hands off than sharing a photo like that with anyone.

“You know that you have really missed out on a career opportunity here, right?” Felicity asked, looking at Oliver. “These photos are wonderful.”

Oliver chuckled. “I think they work for family albums and that’s it.”

“Trust me, they would work for a lot more,” Felicity told him.

“It’s only because I have a really photogenic model,” Oliver whispered into her ear and kissed the soft skin right under her lobe, “and because I love taking photos of you and our family.”

Smiling, Felicity closed the album and cradled it to her chest. “I am going to take good care of this treasure. Thank you.”

“You are welcome,” Oliver replied with a smile. He kissed the edge of her jaw and whispered, “Thank you for making me as happy as you do.”

“Same goes right back to you,” Felicity replied. She slid off Oliver’s lap to snuggle up to his side and kiss him gently. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Their lips met in another slow kiss. Felicity sighed into his mouth and clawed her hand into the fabric of his dress shirt. Her heart bumped happily against her ribs. When their lips parted, they smiled at each other.

“Let’s go to bed,” Felicity suggested. As soon as the words had left her mouth, she puckered her lips and looked at the sleeping kids. “Or let’s sleep here.”

 “Yes, let’s sleep here.” Oliver chuckled, nodding his head. He kissed her lips once more. “Or rather you sleep and I will watch you and our kids sleep.”

Felicity smiled, rubbing her cheek against Oliver’s shoulder. She closed her eyes with a sigh and replied, “Well, I’d do such a corny thing, too, if I wasn’t living for two.”

Oliver kissed the top of her head and tightened his hold around her. “Don’t worry, hon. You sleep and I am corny.”

Felicity chuckled sleepily and replied with a long yawn, “A summary of our marriage.”


	234. Baby Boom

“Only seven more weeks, only seven more weeks, only seven more weeks,” Felicity whispered to herself over and over again as she set back the driver’s seat to unfasten her seatbelt and get out of the car without causing her rounded belly to bump against the steering wheel. While she was getting out of the car, one slightly swollen foot after the other, she repeated the words a few more times, “Only seven more weeks, only seven more weeks, only seven more weeks.”

Once she had gotten out of the car, she released a long sigh and massaged her lower back that was aching under the additional weight of the pregnancy. How this baby was supposed to grow inside of her seven more weeks puzzled her. She had carried three kids before Addie already, though, so she guessed that she would somehow make it through these last weeks this time, too. Hopefully, without bursting like a balloon.

“Look, there’s mommy.”

At the sound of Oliver’s voice somewhere behind her, she locked the car and turned around. He was standing a few feet away from her with Emmy on his shoulders and Millie in her carrier on his back. His forearms were hooked under Tommy’s knees, holding him up against his chest. Oliver as well as Emmy and Tommy all flashed her the exact same amused grin. Pursing her lips, Felicity put her hands onto her hips and cocked her head at them.

“Really?”

Oliver chuckled. “What was I supposed to do? I put Millie into her carrier and then-“

“I wanted to be carried, too,” Emmy said, grinning at her mother. Her fingers moved against Oliver’s neck where they were linked right in front of his throat.

“Me, too,” Tommy added, grinning at his mother widely, as he leaned back against Oliver’s chest and put his little hands to his daddy’s forearms that were pushed under his knees.

“So daddy had to carry all three of you here?” Felicity asked.

“Yes,” Emmy and Tommy replied in chorus, while Millie was squealing happily.

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head, before she nodded towards the entrance to the hospital. “Come on, let’s go and visit Aunt Lyla and Baby Connor.”

“Yes!” Emmy exclaimed excited.

Smiling, Felicity waited until Oliver had caught up to her. He pecked her lips before they walked towards the hospital side by side. John had given them a call, announcing the birth of his son Connor Oliver Diggle, this morning. Emmy had immediately stated that she wanted to see the baby because their soon-to-be-born baby siblings had been all she and Sara had talked about these past weeks. Since Felicity had promised to stop by at Queen Incorporated today, though, Emmy had been forced to wait until the afternoon. Now, it was time for them to visit the youngest Diggle, though.

When they stepped into the hall of the hospital, Felicity pointed her finger back and forth between Emmy and Tommy. “Time for you to get off daddy.”

“But, mommy!” Emmy complained, making a face.

Felicity shook her head. “No monkeying around in a hospital.”

Both Emmy and Tommy groaned, but Oliver nodded. “Mommy’s absolutely right.”

That being said, he put Tommy back to the floor and lifted Emmy off his shoulders to set her down, too. As they strolled to the elevator, Tommy took Felicity’s hand, leaning his head against his mother’s hip. Felicity smiled at him, stroking her hand over the back of his hand. When Tommy looked up at her, Felicity winked at him, and smiled happily.

“I want to push the button!” he exclaimed only a moment later, though, and let go of her hand to run ahead to the elevators with Emmy.

Felicity sighed, and Oliver stroked his hand over her back in response. “Emmy is so excited, she was babbling and fooling around all day. She was actually bewildering Tommy and Millie. It’s why we walked here instead of getting them into the car. I thought she’d grow tired and a little calmer with that.”

“Doesn’t look like she is tired,” Felicity said with another sigh, “or calm for that matter.”

Oliver nodded in agreement. “She is still completely hyped about the news. You know how she is with babies.”

“And it’s not even her baby sibling,” Felicity replied. When they arrived at the elevator where Emmy was pushing the button for the elevator again and again. Felicity pulled her hand away. “Emmy, that’s enough.”

“But why isn’t the elevator coming?” Emmy asked.

“It takes some time,” Felicity responded. “You know that.”

Emmy groaned, but when Felicity perked up her eyebrow at her, she shot her mother an innocent smile and announced, “The elevator is there.”

They rode up in the elevator to the fifth floor where there was the newborn nursery. As they got out, Felicity squeezed Oliver’s hand and suggested, “Go ahead with the kids already. I need to pee. The baby’s is using my bladder as a trampoline lately.”

Oliver chuckled. “Only seven more weeks.”

“Only seven more weeks,” Felicity repeated.

While Oliver went ahead to take the kids to the Diggles, Felicity strolled down the hallway to the toilets. After giving birth to three children in this very same hospital – well, technically it had only been two given the fact that Millie hadn’t been able to wait until they had arrived here – she knew this ward like the back of her hand. Besides, you didn’t forget the place where your now-husband had dumped you after just one date that literally blew up in their faces. Shaking her head, Felicity pushed the painful memory away. It been years since that had happened and it didn’t really matter anymore anyway.

Felicity peeled herself out of her pants toilsomely. Despite the extra stretch at the waist of the jeans, getting out of them had become increasingly difficult lately. It was why she usually didn’t wear anything else but her sweatpants or leggings when she was home. It really made things easier, especially given the increasing number of times she had to pee each day.

When she got back out of the ladies’ room, she strolled towards Lyla’s hospital room. Just when she was about to turn into the corridor to her right, a door to her left opened and Felicity stopped, cocking her head, when Thea stepped out.

“Hi,” her younger sister-in-law said, smiling at Felicity like she had just caught her getting up to nonsense. “What are you doing here?”

“Visiting Lyla,” Felicity replied. She narrowed her eyes at Thea, who seemed like she couldn’t stop smiling, for a moment before she just smiled knowingly and nodded towards Lyla’s room. “Do you want to come with me?”

Thea nodded. “Yes, sure.”

The two women took exactly two steps before Thea grabbed Felicity’s wrist and turned her around to her. “Felicity?”

Two big, brown eyes were looking at Felicity nervously, and she reached out her hands for her friend and sister, holding both of her hands in hers. She recognized the mixture of excitement and nervousness that seemed to radiate from Thea. She had felt it more times than she could count, too. Felicity shot Thea a knowing smile, wordlessly letting her know that she knew what Thea had to tell her. Thea released a breathy chuckle.

“Are you happy?” Felicity asked.

Thea nodded. “Happy and excited and nervous and freaked out because Roy is still in Hub City to try hire that DJ for Verdant and I really want to tell him, but I don’t want to tell him on the phone. I feel like I am a mess.”

Felicity chuckled and pulled Thea into her arms, giving her a long hug. When they pulled apart, she winked at her. “Wait until you look like me and feel like getting out of your pants is a way to get into a new yoga posture. Like really, _Only seven more weeks_ has grown into my new mantra to hold on. It’s actually a little more than seven weeks, but our babies like to compensate for Oliver’s manner of always being late. I should be kind of happy about that. My ankles are starting to swell again and moving is quite exhausting without swollen ankles already.”

“That’s… not encouraging at all,” Thea said with a frown, but chuckled nonetheless. Then she took in a deep breath and looked at Felicity. Her smile grew quieter, but it didn’t fail to show how happy she was. “I am going to be a mommy.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over Thea’s short hair. “And you are going to be a really great one. I know because my kids adore you.”

“Oh god, stop it, you are making me cry,” Thea said, wiping her hands under her eyes. “At least I can blame the hormones.”

“You can blame them for everything the next months,” Felicity replied. Smiling, she moved her fingers through Thea’s hair once more. “My baby sister is having a baby.”

“Since when do you call me your baby sister? Ollie is usually the only one to do that.”

“Hormones,” Felicity replied with a chuckle and kissed Thea’s cheek. “I am sure Roy is going to be just as excited as you are.”

Thea took in a deep breath and nodded. “Yes, I think so. I am going to tell him as soon as he is back home which should be by tomorrow afternoon. I actually wanted to do a pregnancy test party tomorrow morning, but then I just couldn’t wait and I figured with Connor being born and your anniversary and then Millie’s birthday, I should just schedule an appointment. Now I just need to find a way to distract myself until then.”

Felicity chuckled, putting an arm around Thea’s shoulder and leading her to Lyla’s room. “I have three kids to lend in that case.”

They both chuckled at that, and they were still chuckling when they knocked at the door to Lyla’s room and their friend’s voice answered from the inside, “Come in.”

Felicity squeezed Thea’s shoulder once more before she let go of her and opened the door. She smiled at the sight of Emmy, Sara and Tommy crouching on the bed and taking a careful look at the youngest Diggle. They were all whispering to each other. Oliver bounced Millie up and down on his arm while he was talking to John.

“Hi,” Felicity whispered and approached the bed. She took in the beautiful baby boy for a moment before she stepped closer to Lyla and hugged her. “Congratulations.”

“Thank you,” Lyla replied.

“He is really beautiful.”

“He is, right?” Lyla answered. She moved her hand over the little boy’s stomach and smiled at him. “I adore him so much.”

“Everyone has to adore such a handsome baby boy,” Felicity assured.

She kissed her friend’s cheek before she stepped aside to make room for Thea to congratulate the young mother. Felicity stepped behind Emmy instead, looking at little Connor Diggle. When he opened his eyes for a moment, Emmy released a loud screech.

“He opened his eyes!”

Felicity put her hands to the bed next to Emmy and leaned forward, leveling her face with her daughter’s to whisper to her, “Emmy, Connor is just a few hours old. He needs rest. If you can’t be quieter, we gotta go outside with you to get you a timeout.”

“No, no timeout,” Emmy said urgently, looking at her mother.

Felicity perked up her eyebrow. “Can you be quiet enough to let Connor rest?”

Emmy nodded. “Yes, mommy.”

“Good,” Felicity replied and kissed Emmy’s cheek. “Connor is cute, right?”

Again, Emmy nodded. “But our baby is going to be cuter.”

Felicity chuckled. “It’s not a competition.”

“But if it was, we’d win.”

“Did you already congratulate Aunt Lyla and Uncle John?” Felicity asked, changing the subject. When Emmy nodded, Felicity smiled. “Good. Mommy will go to congratulate Uncle John then.”

“I am being quiet to not wake Connor,” Emmy whispered.

“Good,” Felicity replied.

She shot a short look to Lyla, who smiled at her, before she went over to Oliver and John. She spread her arms for her best friend and big brother and with a chuckle, John stepped into her arms and let her hug him.

“Congratulations to you, too.”

“Thanks, Felicity,” John replied. He looked towards the bed where Lyla and Thea were talking to Sara, Emmy and Tommy about Baby Connor. Eventually, he turned back around to Oliver and Felicity. “A few more weeks, and I am going to congratulate you guys again.”

“Seven more weeks,” Oliver and Felicity said in chorus.

John chuckled. “I guess that answers my question how you are getting along.”

“I just can’t wait for the baby to be born,” Felicity explained with a sigh. When Millie reached out her arms for her, Felicity lifted her from Oliver’s arms. With the huge baby bump, it wasn’t easy to hold Millie anymore, but the little girl snuggled to her side and played with the tip of her ponytail nonetheless. She didn’t seem to care about the baby bump being in the way at all. “Let’s just hope she is going to be as easy on us as this little nugget here.”

Felicity tickled Millie’s side, and she squealed happily, waving up and down with her arms. For a moment, Millie put her little hands to Felicity’s face and kissed her lips.

“Thank you, honey,” Felicity whispered, and Millie smiled at her mother for a moment before she dropped her head back onto her shoulder.

Smiling, Felicity rubbed her hand over Millie’s back and leaned her cheek against her daughter’s head for a moment. Millie had really made it easy for them these last couple of months. The fact that she was always so content had really eased things for them with the troubling situation of two close pregnancies and a pregnancy depression. It was unbelievable how quickly time had passed. She’d turn a year in only two days.

“Hey, will we-“ When Felicity looked back at John and Oliver and realized the way the two looked at them, she frowned. “What?”

Oliver cocked his head, crossing his arms in front of his broad chest. He leaned towards John before he said, “And she didn’t want us to know because she thought _I_ was going to spill the news before the baby was born.”

Groaning, Felicity realized that she had indeed said that the baby was going to be a girl. She looked at John innocently. “What if I said I was just saying _she_ because it’s a wish?”

John chuckled. “No way. You said it so firmly, you did know exactly what you were saying. Besides, given both of your reaction, it’s already too late for that. Oh, and I know that you two prefer boys because you can’t pick girls’ names.”

Felicity shot a short look back over her shoulder to make sure nobody else had realized before she sighed and asked John, “Don’t tell anyone.”

Again, John chuckled. “Don’t worry. Keeping things between the three of us has never been a problem.”

“Indeed,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “It’s actually how it all began.”

“Well, it began with the two of you coming to me with the stupidest excuses,” Felicity corrected, giving them a look. “But whatever. Do you know when Lyla is getting out of here?”

“In a few hours,” John said. “Since there were no complications, they want to send her home as soon as possible.”

“I never made it out of the hospital in twenty-four hours. Really, I have stayed almost a week with every baby,” Felicity replied. When Millie giggled, Felicity leaned her head back to look at her daughter and bounced her up and down playfully. “You are laughing. You’ve been the worst. You couldn’t even wait until mommy was in the hospital.”

“Well, at least she had the decency to wait until our anniversary was over,” Oliver replied, stroking his finger through Millie’s short hair.

“Speaking of,” Thea said as she approached them. “I could take the kids tonight, so you can celebrate.”

“That’s nice, but unnecessary,” Oliver replied. “Felicity and I celebrated our anniversary early on Bali this year.”

“Yeah, the wedding we weren’t invited to,” Lyla said with a mocking-accusing gaze. “You know, we could have used a vacation on Bali, too.”

“I really wouldn’t mind taking the kids.” Thea shot Felicity a meaningful gaze. “Besides, Roy doesn’t come back home before tomorrow afternoon anyway, so I don’t have anything to do.”

Felicity smiled and held out Millie for her. “They are all yours.”

Oliver frowned. “They are?”

Thea took Millie and kissed the baby’s cheek. “You heard her, Ollie. They are all mine.”

“For the next twenty-four hours,” Oliver replied. “If you want kids permanently, get your own.”

For like the beat of a second, Thea shot Felicity a look. She hesitated to answer, unsure of what to say.

“Hey, if Lyla is getting out of the hospital today, will you come over for Millie’s birthday?” Felicity asked John, changing the subject. “Just for a few hours?”

“If Connor allows it, sure,” John replied. He shot a look to where the boy was lying on Lyla’s outstretched legs. “So far, he seems to be quite happy when being around people.”

“Great,” Felicity said, smiling. “So that’s decided.”

When Connor released a low cry, everyone turned their head to the little boy.

“I guess it’s time for your meal, buddy,” Lyla said, lifting the baby from her legs and pulling him close to her chest.

“I think that’s our cue to leave,” Felicity said, tapping her forefinger against Oliver’s shoulder.

He nodded. “Absolutely.”

“Okay, everyone whose surname is Queen who wants to get spoiled with pizza and movies tonight comes with me.”

“Hey, if that’s the prospect for tonight, I should come with you, too,” Felicity chuckled.

Oliver quickly grabbed her hand and pulled her to his side. “No way. You are staying with me.”

Smiling, Felicity patted his chest. “Don’t worry, honey. I am not going to leave you.”

They said goodbye to Lyla, John, Sara and Connor and took the kids out of the hospital. Oliver got the children’s car seats and got them into Thea’s car. Since she always had clothes and everything else that was needed for the kids at her place, she could just take them with her now instead of picking them up from their home later.

Hand in hand, Oliver and Felicity strolled towards their own car. Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked her, squeezing her hand.

“More than alright,” Felicity replied. Smiling, she lifted her head off his shoulder and looked at Oliver. “I know I like to complain about being pregnant every once in a while-“

“-which you have the right to because I know Addie is maltreating your bladder and keeping you up at night and your ankles are swollen again-“

“-but the truth is that I also want this pregnancy to be over because I can’t wait to meet her,” Felicity explained and moved her hand over her stomach. “I can’t wait to find out if she is going to be a sweetheart like Millie or rather troublesome like Emmy and Tommy. It’s going to be a lot of work with two babies who can’t walk or talk and need constant help with everything, but there will be good moments, too. Right?”

“Of course, there will be,” Oliver replied. He tugged some strands of hair behind Felicity’s ear and kissed her lips gently. “And we are going to enjoy all of them, but before we get head first back into the work of a newborn, let’s try and catch some rest until then.”

Felicity smiled, leaning against Oliver’s chest and wrapping her arms around his waist. “And what exactly have you planned for us to relax?”

Oliver chuckled, massaging her lower back with the gentle touch of his fingers that made Felicity purr contently. He always knew exactly where the pregnancy was causing the most pain on her body. Oliver smiled. “I could cook for you.”

“Hmmm,” Felicity hummed. “Spaghetti carbonara?”

“Everything you want,” Oliver replied and pecked her lips, “and then we spend the evening on the couch, watching all the movies you like and then I am going to take you to bed-“

“You do?”

“Mhm,” Oliver replied, nodding. He tipped his head forward, nuzzling her nose and brushing his lips against hers. “Now that the kids are with Thea, we can actually celebrate our wedding anniversary early once more.”

Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes, scratched her fingernails over Oliver’s scalp gently and kissed him. She felt goosebumps running down her back when his tongue swiped over her bottom lip. Too much aware of their surroundings to let herself get lost in the moment, Felicity pulled away from him with a sigh.

“I really need those spaghetti you talked about first.”

Oliver chuckled and pecked her lips. “Let’s go shopping. We can also get you a bucket of mint chocolate chip ice cream.”

“I know exactly why I married you.”

“Because I always know what food you need?”

Felicity grinned, patting his chest. “Exactly.”

 

 

“Oliver.”

Oliver sighed sleepily, trying to tighten his hold on Felicity’s body when he felt the warmth that radiated off her chest leaving his chest. After two rounds of celebrating their wedding anniversary several hours early, his body was all relaxed and all he wanted was sleep even if it was probably just eleven pm or something.

“Oliver, wake up,” Felicity said more urgently now, shaking his shoulder.

Immediately, his eyes snapped open and he sat up in bed. When the light was switched on, he had to blink several times against the stitching pain in his eyes. Yet, he looked at Felicity with slightly narrowed eyes. She was sitting on the edge of the bed and Oliver felt his worry taken over at the sight of her pale face.

“What happened? What’s wrong?”

“We need to go to the hospital,” Felicity told him, grabbing her sweatpants. “My water broke.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will submit my master’s thesis tomorrow (finally!!!) and spend a lot of time writing tomorrow and Tuesday. I hope to update by Tuesday then. ;)


	235. Eleven-fifty-nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter includes fear of child loss as well as premature birth.

By now, Oliver had been on the verge of dying more times than he could count. He had been tortured, both physically and emotionally, until even holding onto life had been almost too much to take. He had been left exhausted, broken and in pain, wanting to die. After those five years away that had put him through situations like that again and again, Oliver had been sure that there was nothing that could scare him anymore. He had fought for his life, but he had made peace with the fact that maybe he wouldn’t life a long, happy life as other men, and he felt like that was okay.

Then he had come back to Starling, and eventually he had had to realize that coming back had changed everything. It hadn’t been only about himself anymore. It had been about all the people he could lose and all the people who could lose him. Despite everything Oliver had thought possible, it had scared him. It had scared him a lot, actually. After the Gambit had went down, the people closest to him had eventually processed his death. They had mourned him and moved on. The thought of dying and putting them through that again had scared him because he had seen at least fractures of what it had done to his mother and Thea, even Tommy and Laurel. Hence, he had thought that was the worst, the fear of losing the people you loved or making them lose you.

Oliver had never changed his mind on that. The thought of losing the people closest to him or dying too soon and making them suffer through losing him was his biggest fear. He had lived through the death of his parents, his best friend and so many people that had meant a lot to him. He knew how terrible a loss like that felt. He knew the void a loss like that left. He knew how hard it was to pick yourself up after a loss like that. He didn’t want to put anyone through something like that, and he didn’t want to experience another loss like that, either.

Over the years, Oliver had gained more and more loved ones. The team, that had always felt like a second family to him, had expanded. Then John had become a dad. Oliver remembered very well how John had told him that he felt his whole universe had changed the moment he had taken a first look at his baby girl. Admittedly, Oliver hadn’t completely gotten it at that point. He had thought that, because he had fallen in love with Felicity and that love had changed a lot for him, that he would get exactly what John had been talking about.

It hadn’t been quite true, though. Oliver loved Felicity with all his heart, and he knew that losing her would going to cause some severe, irreparable damage to his soul. There was no denying that when you decided to spend the rest of your lives together, eventually one of you would have to die. Unfortunately, in most case it meant that one of you died first, while the other had to live on. In Oliver’s vision, he and Felicity would spend a long life together before they died together, arm in arm in a retirement home, so neither of them would have to lose the other. He knew that this wish probably wouldn’t be granted, though, and Oliver was selfish enough to hope that it was him who’d die first then. As much as he didn’t want Felicity to go through the pain of losing him, he didn’t want to lose her, either.

It was the wheel of the world. Everyone lost people. You lose your parents. Sometimes you lose your siblings, especially when they were older that you. That was just life.  There was one thing that was so much against the way life was supposed to go that it beat any other fear and any other cruelty life could throw at you, though. And that was losing a child.

Oliver had experienced a fear like that once before. He and Felicity had been sitting in this very hospital and thought that they might have lost a baby just then. They hadn’t even been sure that Felicity had really been pregnant, but she had been late on her period and she had had terrible cramps. They had been fighting because he had, out of some insecurity, wrongfully accused her of cheating when the stomach cramps had started and Felicity had told him that she might be pregnant. After some tests, they had been told that Felicity hadn’t had a miscarriage because she hadn’t been pregnant in the first place. Those minutes that he had spent worrying about a baby he hadn’t even known about seconds before had been terrible, almost unbearable even.

This was worse, though. It was like the time Felicity had fallen down the stairs and had been bleeding while she had been pregnant with Tommy. Oliver had thought he’d lose both of them that night. He might have lost both of them if it hadn’t been for Barry, who had taken them to the hospital with super speed.

This was as bad as that time. He had spent the last seven months being excited about this baby. Felicity had taken so much pain and so much stress to allow this baby to be born. She had taken weeks of feeling exhausted and emotionless, of blaming herself for not being the boss, friend, wife and mother she wanted to be. She had taken it all because she had wanted to keep their baby safe. She hadn’t even allowed herself to take medication for a chance of feeling better because she had wanted to protect their baby from any damage as long as possible. She had quit coffee and steaks and alcohol and everything else that might not be good for their baby. They had been so excited. They had picked a name. If they lost this baby, they didn’t just lose any baby. They’d lose Addie, the daughter they had been looking forward to meeting for months now.

As the sliding doors closed behind Felicity, Oliver felt his shoulders slump, and a breath he hadn’t known he had been holding left his lips. Moving his fingers over his scalp almost violently, Oliver squeezed his eyes shut, trying to figure out what the hell had happened in the last thirty minutes.

After Felicity had woken him up, he had put on some sweatpants and a hoodie jacket, and they had gotten to the hospital. Felicity had barely said a word during the drive. He had seen from the corner of his eye that she had been nervous, and he had taken her hand and held it against his chest. He had known that she had needed it, and Oliver had needed it, too. As much as he had tried to stay calm for Felicity’s sake, he had been terribly nervous and worried.

The drive to the hospital had taken only ten minutes as Oliver had bent all speed limits to get them there as soon as possible. He had told the bored woman at the reception what had happened and they had immediately been taken to gynecologic ward where the doctor on duty, a young woman whose name Oliver didn’t remember, had met them. She had examined Felicity thoroughly, while Oliver had been holding his wife’s hand and stroking his fingers through her hair to calm her down.

Oliver didn’t remember how long the examination had taken. The doctor had talked to them soothingly, asking questions about the pregnancy and their family to try easing their tension. It hadn’t really helped, but Oliver had appreciated the try. He guessed time would have only felt even longer if it hadn’t been for the doctor’s talking.

The doctor had left them alone for a few minutes then to take the blood sample to the lab while the baby’s heartrate and Felicity’s labor which hadn’t started yet had been monitored. Felicity had looked at him with tears in her eyes and taken in a deep breath. He had seen the fear in her eyes, yet hadn’t missed that she seemed a little bit more relaxed since the doctor seemed to be quite calm about the situation.

With whispered voice, Felicity had told him that she was scared. Oliver had kissed her forehead, squeezing her hand, and admitted that he was scared, too. Together they had watched the baby’s heartrate on the monitor then, letting the quick but even throbbing calm them down a little more. They had both known that as long as Addie’s heartbeat stayed like that, things couldn’t be as bad is they may have looked.

Eventually, the doctor had come back. She had taken a look at the results of the monitoring and sat down next to them with a smile. She had told them she would like Felicity to stay in the hospital for a while, staying in bed and taking antibiotics. She had also told them that she would like Felicity to get tocolytic to delay her labor if necessary and another shot of steroids to support the development of Addie’s lungs. That way, they would allow Addie to develop a little further and improve her starting situation before she could be born in a couple of days.

It had all sounded great, like there was no reason worry, and Oliver had seen how the fear had slowly left Felicity’s face. Her grip on his hand had grown gentler, and Oliver had felt his own tension slowly fading away. It had all sounded so promising.

Before the doctor had been able to fully explain her plans to them, though, Felicity’s hand had suddenly tightened around Oliver’s fingers once more. She had released a strained breath, her face screwed up in pain. He had rubbed his thumb over the back of Felicity’s hand and gently combed his fingers through her hair until Felicity’s face had relaxed again.

Oliver had been so distracted by her pain and his need to comfort her that it had taken a moment until he had realized that the doctor’s facial expression had changed from relaxed to worried. As soon as the young doctor had caught his eyes on her, she had tried to control her facial expression more, but Oliver had been too alarmed to miss her sudden tension and if the way Felicity had been looking at him had been any indication, she hadn’t miss it, either.

The doctor had examined Felicity for a couple of seconds once more before she had called for a nurse to come and prepare an emergency C-section. Oliver and Felicity had both taken a worried look at each other, and Oliver had felt his heart sinking into his stomach.

After that, everything had gone so fast. A nurse had helped the doctor to get Felicity’s bed to move. As they had already hurried to the OR, the doctor had told them that waiting was no option anymore. Apparently, with the start of the labor and because of the less amniotic fluid Addie had been pressing down on the umbilical cord which had been causing a lack of oxygen and with that a slowdown of her heartrate. Things had blurred for him then. The doctor had said more, things about a short timeframe and a risk of severe damage as well as general anesthetic and how Oliver couldn’t go with them in the OR.

Felicity had squeezed his hand, asking him to make sure Addie was alright and to stay with her after she had been born. She herself would get along, but she didn’t want their daughter to be alone. Oliver had promised her that he wouldn’t leave Addie out of sight until he was a hundred percent sure that she was fine. Then he had kissed Felicity’s forehead and watched the doctors taking her away in the OR.

“Fuck.”

The word only came out as a whisper when really Oliver wanted to scream it from the top of his lungs. His voice refused, though. He was barely able to get out a breath, never mind a tone. The desperation he felt dug its way deep into his heart and paralyzed him. The thought of losing Addie scared him, filling every cell of his body until there was nothing left but panic.

His eyes were glued to the clock over the sliding doors Felicity had disappeared behind. The minute hand jumped from fifty-five to fifty-six. How long had it been since Felicity had disappeared into the OR? Oliver shook his head. He was sure that his sense for time was clouded from his fear and thinking about how much time had passed since Felicity had been pushed into the OR was not going to get him any reasonable result.

Oliver was also sure that staring at the clock wasn’t going to make time go by faster. According to the way each second seemed to take an eternity to pass, he knew he had to look somewhere else. With a deep sigh and heavy feeling in his heart, Oliver turned away and paced down the hallway nervously.

If anything happened to Felicity or Addie, he had no idea how to go on from that. He had experienced a lot of losses in his life, but he knew losing Felicity or their baby was not something he would put himself back together after easily.

As Oliver reached the end of the hallway, he turned back around and paced up the hallway back to the doors to the corridor that led to the OR. He kept his gaze down, avoiding looking at the clock.

He was kind of relieved that Emmy, Tommy and Millie were spending the night at Thea’s place, and William was home with his mom in San Francisco. He didn’t want to think how much more complicated things had gotten when they had been home and he would have had to explain to them why he and Felicity had to go to the hospital and would have had to wait until someone had come over to take care of them.

Turning back around to walk down the hallway once more, Oliver sucked in a deep breath, trying to breathe against the pain that spread in his chest. If Addie didn’t make it, how were they going to tell the kids? There was a nursery, they had all worked on together, waiting for Addie. They had bought a stuffed animal, a plushy donkey, for her when they had been in Bali. Her siblings were looking forward to meeting her. So, how did you explain to children that sometimes even babies died?

Oliver shook his head violently and turned back around on his heels. He was walking even more quickly now. His eyes found the clock unwillingly. Eleven-fifty-seven.

Biting down on his tongue hard, Oliver sat down on one of the chairs that was screwed onto the wall. He propped his elbows up onto his knees and hid his face in his hands, taking a deep breath.

Tomorrow night they would have finished the thirty-third week of pregnancy, well, Felicity would have. Or they had. Oliver usually didn’t like talking about how _they_ were pregnant or something like that. It wasn’t a way of fleeing the responsibility of being a father. He just felt like Felicity was the one who had to take the physical changes that came with pregnancy. She was the one who had to quite coffee and alcohol and her beloved steaks and who had to work through the depression. She had done all the work, and he wouldn’t take credit for that. Yet, he didn’t think it was her responsibility that something like this had happened. They were in this together and they would process this loss together.

Oliver squeezed his eyes shut and scratched his fingernails over his scalp. There was no loss to process yet, and he had to stop thinking like there was. He was going to believe in Addie and her strength for as long as there was any reason to believe.

He glanced at the clock. Eleven-fifty-eight. Groaning, Oliver got up, once more starting to pace up and down the hallway. He couldn’t sit still right now. Oliver wrapped his arms around himself tightly. He felt terribly cold, maybe out of tiredness or maybe out of panic.

Oliver paced down the hallway once more before he sat back on the chair, leaning his head back against the cold wall and taking in a deep breath. He was fidgeting with his foot, still unable to hold still. Yet, he felt the deep breath calming his nerves a little or at least clear his head a bit.

Addie was born into a family of fighters.

Oliver himself had fought for his life when the Gambit had gone down. He had fought to find out who he was and who he could be. He had fought to find his way back to Starling to protect this city from all harm. He had fought for his family, and he had fought to accept the losses it had caused him along the way. He had fought death and torture and pain, and he had made it at the end.

Felicity had fought her entire life to overcome the insecurities her father’s abandonment had left her with. She had fought to go to MIT despite the little money her mother had had and despite the little support Felicity had felt Donna had offered. She had fought to become the woman she was today. She had fought and still was fighting for this city. She had fought two depressions. She had fought for herself and for others because that was who Felicity was.

Her parents were fighters, and her siblings were fighters, too.

William had lived only with his mother, not knowing who his dad was. He had fought the insecurities that came with that. He had also fought the even bigger insecurities when he had been introduced into his father’s family, getting to know his younger siblings that had known their dad all their lives.

Emmy had had to fight even before she had been born, at least kind of. Cupid had threatened to take her from her parents and raise her as her own to trap Oliver into a relationship. Then, she had fought her fear when she and Felicity had been kidnapped by Foster, and she had had to find her way back home all on her own. Later on, she had fought the insecurities that had come with William’s introduction.

Tommy had definitely had to fight to even get a start into this life. He had almost died before he had even taken his first breath, but he had fought to survive like Felicity and Barry and the doctors had fought for him survive, and he had made it. Then he had fought the problems he had had with Millie’s addition into the family, and the feeling of not being his momma’s little boy anymore, and now he was actually looking forward to another baby sibling.

Millie had… well, Millie wasn’t much of a fighter actually, Oliver thought to himself and couldn’t contain the ghost of a content smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Millie was the little peacemaker in the family. She was quiet and content. Yet, Oliver was sure she would fight if ever put in a situation that she had to, too. She had fought her way into this world despite being stuck in an elevator after all.

Oliver took in another deep breath. Addie was born into a family of fighters, and if she was anything like her parents or her siblings, then she was going to fight and she was going make it. She would make it.

“She will make it,” Oliver whispered to himself as a single tear escaped the corner of his eye and rolled down his cheek. He folded his hands and send a quiet prayer to heaven. “Addie has to make.”

Oliver squeezed his eyes shot for a moment before he glanced at the clock once more. Eleven-fifty-nine. The waiting went on.

 

 

As soon as Felicity felt Oliver’s lips brushing against her forehead in a gentle kiss, she stirred in her sleep. Her hand moved to her stomach on own accord like it had done in the past months. The moment she realized the stomach was much flatter than it was supposed to be at the end of the thirty-third week of pregnancy, she suddenly remembered what had happened.

She remembered how she had woken up in the middle of the night, unsure of what had woken her until she had felt the wetness between her legs and on the sheets. She had woken up Oliver and he had taken her to the hospital. Everything that had happened so quickly. One moment she had thought everything was alright, the next she had already been taken to the OR for an emergency C-section.

Felicity had woken up after the surgery, alone in that hospital room. At first, she had almost longed for Oliver to be at her side and hold her hand. She had been in pain and scared about their daughter’s wellbeing. She would have needed him there. After a few minutes, when the effects of the anesthesia had fully let go and her mind had cleared a little more, though, she had remembered that she had specifically asked Oliver to stay at Addie’s side. If she herself had been in pain and scared, she had been sure that Addie had felt the same. It had been why she had asked Oliver to stay with their daughter in the first place.

Her stomach dropped at the thought that he was here now. She knew that it couldn’t have been easy for Oliver to decide where to be, with her or with Addie. Taking the decision from him had been another part of why she had asked him to stay with Addie. As hard as she knew it must have been for him, she was sure he wouldn’t deny her a wish like that. He shouldn’t be here unless he had no more reason to be with Addie.

Against the heaviness of her lids, Felicity opened her eyes. She had to blink a few times until the schemes she saw finally stopped blurring in front of her. With an exhausted sigh, she snuggled her hand into his hand that rested against her cheek. His thumb stroked over her cheekbone gently.

Felicity just looked at Oliver, unable to ask the question she felt preying on her mind. She didn’t even know how to ask. If she asked if Addie was dead, she’d start crying before the last syllable had been spoken if she’d even get a single sound out. Asking if Addie was okay seemed redundant since their little girl had been born seven weeks early. Felicity tried to remember what she had read about babies being born that early because she had read a lot about preemies, knowing that premature birth was common in pregnancies that correlated with depression. She was too tired, too exhausted and too scared to remember, though.

She didn’t need to ask the question anyway. Oliver could read it in her face. He smiled at her, and though there was exhaustion and even sadness in his eyes, Felicity didn’t miss the hopeful glint beneath it.

“She’s fine,” Oliver whispered to her. “Addie is fine. She is unbelievably strong, a real fighter, and she is so beautiful.”

Felicity felt a sob rising in her throat before it escaped her lips and a tear rolled down her cheek. Oliver wiped it away and kissed the corner of her mouth. She trusted Oliver to tell her the truth. If there were any major problems, he’d tell her. If he was hopeful and confident in their daughter’s wellbeing, she knew she could be, too.

When she had woken up after the surgery, she had waited for someone to come to her and tell her what had happened. It had taken a few minutes, but eventually a nurse had come and told her that Addie was fine. Felicity hadn’t been sure if she could believe her, though. The nurse had also said the doctor would come to see Felicity soon, and she could tell her about Addie, but Felicity had fallen back asleep.

Knowing that Addie was alright took some of the tension and fear that had built insider of her. It was like a heavy weight had been taken off her chest. The tiredness tried to take over once more, but Felicity rubbed her hands over her face and looked at Oliver. She didn’t want to sleep now. There was still time for that later.

“You need to tell me everything,” she asked in a whisper, “starting with why you aren’t with her right now. Like, shouldn’t you be there and make sure she knows she is not alone and-“

“She is being checked through once more,” Oliver interrupted her and gently stroked the knuckles of his hand down the side of her face. “I wanted to use the time to check on you and update you. Dr. Manning told me she wanted to update you before, but you were sleeping, and she didn’t want to wake you.”

“So, update me,” Felicity asked. “I want to know everything there is to know about her.”

Smiling, Oliver leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers. He pulled his hand from her face and turned on the bed, so he was sitting right next to her. Felicity took his hand and snuggled up to his side, wrapping his arm around her. While Oliver reached into the pocket of his hoodie jacket, Felicity angled her head forward to breathe him in. There were many reasons why she loved Oliver, the fact that he was her rock when times were hard was definitely on the top five of them.

Wordlessly, Oliver held out his phone for her and Felicity scrolled through the half a dozen photos he had taken of Addie. She was tiny, the tiniest baby Felicity had ever seen. Tommy had been tiny already since he had been born three weeks early, but Addie seemed to be even tinier. She was lying in an incubator, attached to monitors and other medical equipment. There was a breathing tube under her nose, a smaller tube leading into her nose from somewhere Felicity couldn’t see. A convoluted towel was put under her legs, probably to make it more comfortable for her. She looked lost in there. Yet, just like Oliver had told her, Felicity didn’t miss how beautiful she was.

At the sight of her baby, no matter how tiny or lost she looked, Felicity felt her heart swell with love and with pride. This beautiful baby was hers, and despite the crappy start into her life, she was fighting. She was their little warrior princess, Felicity thought, and it made the ghost of a smile appear on her face.

“She’s 16.5 inches and 3.7 pound,” Oliver explained to her. “She is breathing on her own, but according to Dr. Manning she has breathing cessations every once in a while, so they give her a little more oxygen and support her breathing. She is doing her best to hold her temperature on her own, but to relieve her with the troublesome start, they are helping her a little with that. Since preemies like Addie often tend to have trouble with eating, too, Dr. Manning decided to use a feeding tube. We should try to feed her manually, but for the case that she isn’t drinking enough, they will feed her some more over the tube. Dr. Manning asked if you wanted to breastfeed. We didn’t talk about it, but-“

“Yes, of course I do,” Felicity replied. “I can’t wait for it. I missed it when Millie was younger.”

Oliver smiled and squeezed her hand. “That is exactly what I told her.”

Felicity shot Oliver a short smile before she looked back at the photos of their youngest daughter. She moved her thumb over the pixels that showed her face for a moment, feeling a stitch of pain since she couldn’t touch her baby yet.

“When can I see her?” Felicity asked, turning her head to look at Oliver.

“Soon,” he promised and kissed her forehead. “Dr. Manning wants to check you through once more, and you need a little more rest from the surgery. You will see her today, though. I promise.”

Felicity snuggled herself closer to Oliver for a moment. She knew he was right. Addie was, though mostly healthy it seemed, still fighting. Addie needed rest, and so did Felicity. At least for now.

“You should go back to her,” Felicity whispered. “I don’t want her to be alone at any time.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered against the top of Felicity’s hair and kissed her forehead gently. “I just don’t want to leave you yet.”

“I am fine,” Felicity promised and stroked her hand over his chest. “You should be with Addie.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “Dr. Manning said I could hold her after the examination. You know, kangaroo care.”

“Oh, you are going to take off your shirt,” Felicity replied, ginning at him. “All the other mothers are going to faint.”

“Maybe.” Oliver chuckled, coming his fingers through her hair. “Dr. Manning is probably going to ask you to express some milk for Addie, but she said she wanted her to learn how to drink herself, so she suggested trying to breastfeed her too as soon as you feel fit enough. That way she’d only get the rest of the milk over the feeding tube.”

Felicity nodded. “Get me a breast pump and I am going to express her next meal.”

Oliver kissed her temple. “I am going to take care of it.”

Again, Felicity nodded. She rested her cheek back against Oliver’s chest for a moment. She had at least one more very important question preying on her mind, but she didn’t know how to ask it. She didn’t have to anyway, since Oliver seemed to catch up onto it. His arms around her body tightened.

“Thins like this happen, Felicity,” he whispered to her. “Addie is a little wildflower, remember? She didn’t want to wait any longer to get to meet us. This is not your fault.”

“If I hadn’t had the depression-“

“-which wasn’t your fault, it could have happened anyway.”

“Because we’ve traveled to Bali and-“

“-because things like this happen,” Oliver whispered and kissed her forehead once more. “Sometimes there is no reason why other than that maybe some higher power believed we could make it through this.”

Felicity took in a deep breath and whispered, “Maybe.”

“Definitely,” Oliver replied. He kissed her temple and, after a moment of quiet, added, “Happy anniversary, by the way.”

Releasing a mixture of a sigh and a chuckle, Felicity angled her head back to look at Oliver with a sad smile. “Happy anniversary.”

Smiling, Oliver ducked his head and brushed his lips against hers gently. Felicity responded to the kiss, sighing against his lips and stroking her fingertips through his short hair. When their lips parted, they breathed the same air for a moment. Then Oliver brushed his lips against hers once more.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered.

“I love you, too.” Oliver smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. “We are celebrating our anniversaries quite eventfully lately, don’t we?”

Felicity chuckled. “Our babies tend to enter this world dramatically.”

Oliver nodded. “They really do. I filled out Addie’s birth certificate by the way. I thought you’d like to take a look at it.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied.

She held out her hand for the paper. Oliver handed it to her, casting her an unreadable look that made Felicity narrow her eyes on him slightly. Oliver just smiled innocently in response. Slowly, Felicity lowered her eyes to the birth certificate, and it only took her a second to understand why Oliver had looked at her like that. Felicity puckered her lips for a moment.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“That is not the middle name we agreed on.”

“It isn’t?” Oliver asked with a grin, revealing that he remembered as well as she did that not even a year ago they had had the exact same conversation, just that things had been reversed back then.

“No, it isn’t,” Felicity replied, casting him a look.

Oliver chuckled and kissed her forehead. “I know it’s not. I just... While you were in the OR, I realized how much you had to fight to make sure Addie was okay and how much you had to do it for all of our children. Last year, when Millie was born, you told me that you wanted her middle name to be Olivia because you felt I was her first hero. I think the truth is that you have been the first hero of all our babies. You accepted whatever sacrifices were necessary and did everything in your power to make sure our babies are always alright. So, yeah, I think that middle name is a lot better for Addie.”

Felicity looked down at the paper once more, read the rest of it and held it to her chest. Their baby was alive and doing well. She’d hold her later today and could tell her how much she loved her and how proud she was to be her mommy. Until then, she’d have the photos Oliver had taken and this paper to convince her that everything was going to be alright.

“I think Addie has proved two things so far,” Felicity said, smiling at Oliver. “She is a little fighter.”

“Indeed,” Oliver replied, pride filling his voice as it had filled hers before too.

“And she loves us very much.”

Oliver smiled. “I would have preferred if she had taken more time, but I guess she listened very closely when we talked about how important our anniversary is for us.”

Felicity smiled, nodding her head. She looked at the birth certificate once more, feeling her heart warming even more for their baby girl – Adelaide Megan Queen, born March 24th, 2023, at eleven-fifty-nine.


	236. Superpowers

“She’s so tiny,” Felicity whispered. She stroked her forefinger up and down Addie’s back, her touch so gentle that her finger barely made contact with the tiny human being that was resting on her chest. “It’s almost like if I touch her too firmly, she is going to fall apart.”

Smiling comfortingly, Oliver sat down on the elbow-rest of the armchair Felicity was sitting in and stroked his forefinger of Addie’s rosy cheek. “She may look like that, but she is a lot stronger than that.”

Felicity angled her head back to look at him and perked up her eyebrow. “Is that what this cape is for?”

Oliver chuckled. “It was a gift from Barry. He made a new friend on Earth I-don’t-remember-which-one. He said something like if Addie needs some extra powers for a better start into her life here, his friend Kara would be great encouragement.”

“Barry made friends on some other earth again?”

“She’s an alien to be exact,” Oliver replied. When Felicity shot him an incredulous look, he shook his head. “Don’t ask. He wants us to meet her one day, but I am not quite sold on that. Luckily, we have our own little alien here to make a good ex- Ouch!”

Frowning at Felicity, Oliver rubbed the side of his chest where Felicity had punched him quite firmly. After eighteen hours of drifting in and out of sleep, having a baby and needing surgery, Oliver had thought maybe Felicity’s energy was ceasing. It didn’t seem like that, though, as the painful throbbing of his chest proved.

“Don’t you dare call my baby an alien again, mister” Felicity told him.

“Or what?” Oliver asked back, looking at her in amusement.

Felicity pushed her tongue into her cheek and puckered her lips as she looked at him. Oliver waited for her to say something, but he guessed that the roller coaster of emotions she had been put through in the last hours had left her too exhausted for a good response. With a smile, Oliver ducked his head and captured Felicity’s lips in a gentle kiss.

He had had plans for this anniversary. After Felicity had planned that wonderful vacation and the renewal of their marriage covenant, he had wanted to do something wonderful for her, taking her out on a date and spending time like they had just gotten together, away from all routines and daily grind.

He knew that she had told them that she had done that for them because she had wanted to thank him for standing by her through the depression – which for him was natural – and for asking her to get married to him twice – which had definitely been more selfish than anything else. Anyway, from Felicity’s point of view they were probably even now. Oliver had done a lot of the romantic things he had done for her because she had always stood by him and always supported him before, though. It was going to be an endless cycle of doing things for each other, and Oliver didn’t want to have it any other way. Seven years into this marriage, and they still proved their love for each other, still surprised each other, still spoilt each other whenever they got the chance.

Someone cleared their throat right behind them, and they pulled apart. Even from the corner of his eye he could see a deep blush spreading down Felicity’s neck and smiled to himself. His arm around her shoulders tightened slightly as he turned his face to Dr. Manning.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the young woman said to them, casting them a smile, “but I thought you might want to be updated on Adelaide’s wellbeing.”

“Always,” Felicity replied immediately, and Oliver agreed with a nod of his head.

Smiling, Dr. Manning came a little closer to them and explained, “After the last eighteen hours of carefully observing Adelaide, we can evaluate her condition a little letter, and I can tell you that it looks even better than our first examinations made it look like.”

Oliver felt Felicity sighing out a breath of relief. He squeezed her shoulder, making Felicity look up at him. He smiled at her encouragingly, and Felicity leaned her head against his side. Oliver kissed the top of her head, squeezing her shoulder. It was easier for him to understand that Addie was alright. He had been here when she had been taken out of the OR, and he had heard what Dr. Manning had said while she had examined their little girl. For Felicity, who got to see her and got to hold her for the first time right now, it was different. It was all newer for her.

“Her heartrate continues to be stable. She’s able to hold a stabile temperature which means we will move her from the incubator into a warming bed later today. That’s going to be helpful for you too as you can hold her more easily then,” Dr. Manning explained. “I know it’s always a little difficult as long as they are in the incubator, and you always need someone to help you getting her out and holding there. It’s going to be easier in the warming bed.”

“Can we take her with us to Felicity’s room?” Oliver asked.

He wasn’t sure if that was even possible with the warming bed. Whenever he had sat at Addie’s side here in the hospital, he had tried searching the web for experience reports of parents who had had a baby this early. He had found a lot of encouraging blog entries, but none had been too specific about a few questions Oliver still had.

He knew from those experience reports as well as from sitting at Addie’s side and not getting around watching the other parents visiting their babies here that they were kind of lucky. They could basically hold Addie whenever they wanted to. Of course, sometimes she needed examinations or the nurses told them to give their little princess a little rest, but these last eighteen hours, Oliver had held Addie a lot. Other parents only got to look at their babies through the glass of the incubators. It had to be torture not to touch or hold your baby.

It was why Oliver wanted Addie in Felicity’s room. He couldn’t bear seeing the desperation in all these parents. Addie and her seven weeks early birth were early, but she was almost like a late starter compared to other kids here. While he had been waiting to get to hold Addie for the first time very early this morning, he had talked to one of the other fathers. His first child, a little boy, had been in here for the past weeks. He had been born by only 26 weeks of pregnancy with just a pound of body weight.

He had felt terribly for even consider their situation to be hard because compared to what that man and his family were suffering though, they really had it easy. It was why he wanted Addie to be taken to Felicity’s room where they could focus on only them, at least for now. Once things had calmed down for him, he’d talk to Felicity about donating a lot of money to the hospital’s neonatal ward.

“We will see how she’s getting on in the next hours,” Dr. Manning replied cautiously. “If her condition stays like this over night despite moving her to a warming bed, we will see. I’d also like to take away the breathing tube by tomorrow morning to test how she is getting along without it. If her breathing continues to be regular despite taking away the help, we will know more.”

“Isn’t that too soon?” Felicity asked. “She isn’t even twenty-four hours old and according to the nurse we talked to before, she isn’t really drinking well, and-“

“It’s normal for early starters like Adelaide to be a little slow with drinking,” Dr. Manning explained. “It’s actually one of the problems with premature babies that consists the longest. We will keep an eye on that, make sure she gets enough meals and continue to offer her meals, so we train her and we won’t have to give her too much over the feeding tube. I’d like Adelaide to get out of the hospital as soon as possible since she is stabile and getting some routines is going to help you and your family to get used to this new situation.”

Oliver frowned. “But as long as she got the feeding tube, we can’t take her home with us, right?”

“It’s not impossible to take her home despite the nasogastric tube,” Dr. Manning explained. “We’d teach you how to feed her over it, so it wouldn’t be a problem for you to handle. For now, I’d focus on the hope that she is going to learn how to take her entire meal without the use of the tube, though. We won’t release her until she is at least 4.5 pounds. I am confident she will soon catch up soon, and then we will see.”

“Do you have any idea how long it will take?” Oliver asked.

He knew it had only been eighteen hours since Addie had been born. She and Felicity were both still recovering. He hadn’t even been back home yet since he had spent the entire day at her and Addie’s side. Yet, he knew every day that he’d be home without Felicity, it was going to be hard. He couldn’t sleep when she wasn’t there, and the kids would miss her too. Two weeks was a long time for their mommy not to be home. Even if they visited her every day, it just wasn’t the same.

“I’d say ten days is a modest estimate,” Dr. Manning replied. “Every baby is different, though. It can take longer. Let’s take every day as it is for now.”

Oliver smiled. “Thank you.”

“Sure,” Dr. Manning responded. “If you have any more questions, just let me know. We are going to examine her once more in like twenty minutes for a last check-up before she gets into the warming bed. You can take your time with her until then, and I’d suggest that you try to breastfeed her after our examination if that is alright with you.”

Felicity nodded immediately. “Yes, sure. Thank you, Dr. Manning.”

“Always,” she replied with a smile, turned around and headed to one of the incubators, checking for the baby in it.

Oliver kissed the crown of Felicity’s head and stroked his hand down her back. “Are you okay?”

Felicity released a sigh and looked at him. “Yeah, I think I am. It’s been long eighteen hours.”

“Yeah, I know,” Oliver whispered. “I feel the same. We just need to let some time pass and get used to it.”

“Probably,” Felicity agreed. When Addie released a low cry, Felicity pulled the blanket that was wrapped around the little baby’s body around her more tightly. “There’s no reason to cry, sweetie-pie.”

Oliver smiled, watching the two of them together. It would never fail to amaze him how powerful the love he felt at the sight of his wife holding their baby was. He wasn’t sure if there was anything that made him feel more content. They sat in quiet for some time, just enjoying the moments with their youngest baby.

With a low sigh, Oliver rested his cheek against the crown of Felicity’s head and closed his eyes. For the first time since Felicity had woken him the night before, he felt all the tiredness crashing down on him. If he got to sit here five minutes longer, he knew he’d fall asleep.

It didn’t come to that, though. When Oliver heard Emmy’s voice, he opened his eyes. Through the window towards the hallway, he could see their kids coming closer. Emmy and Tommy were walking hand in hand, William following with Millie. The little girl was holding onto his fingers tightly as she walked in front of him. Since she had discovered that her legs couldn’t only hold her upright, but also move her, at least if she found something to hold onto for balance, she was using every chance she got to walk around and discover places.

“The kids are here,” Oliver whispered to Felicity.

Felicity shot him a look before her gaze followed the way he nodded with his chin. She smiled happily at the sight of their older kids and carefully lifted a hand from Addie’s back to wave towards them. Tommy waved back excitedly and already hurried towards the door.

“I will-“

“Yes,” Felicity replied.

Oliver hurried towards the door, reaching it right before his youngest son. He stepped out into the hallways, closing the door behind him and lifted Tommy into his arm. The young boy released a grumpy mutter.

“Hi, buddy,” he said, kissing the three-year-old’s cheek. His free arm wrapped around Emmy’s shoulders when she hugged his waist and pressed her head to his stomach. “How was the night in the loft with Aunt Thea?”

“Great,” Emmy replied. “We got pizza and sweets and watched movies all night.”

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head slightly. Thea loved spoiling the kids. He would definitely do the same if she had kids one day, though that could gladly wait if he got to decide about it which he knew he didn’t. He wanted it for her, but if he considered that something like this could happen to her, he really didn’t want to think about it.

“Can I go to mama?” Tommy asked.

“Mommy’s coming out soon,” Oliver promised. “She needs to be with your baby sister for a moment longer, though.”

Immediately, Emmy let go of him to step in front of the window and look at her baby sister. Oliver watched Felicity stroking her forefinger over Addie’s head before she pointed at the window and waved like she was showing their little girl her older siblings.

“Hi, Dad,” William said when he reached them.

“Hey, William,” Oliver replied with a smile. “I am glad you could make it so soon.”

“I packed my bag the moment we hung up after you called,” he explained and lifted Millie onto his arm. For a moment, the little girl reached out her hands for Oliver. He leaned forward, put a hand to the baby’s head and kissed her gently. Millie squealed happily, and leaned back against her older brother’s chest. William smiled at her for a moment before he stepped behind Emmy, looking at Felicity and Addie through the window. “Are they alright?”

Smiling, Oliver stepped next to his kids. “Mommy, or Felicity, and Addie are both alright.”

“What’s that green tube in her face for?” Emmy asked, looking up at Oliver with nosy eyes.

“Because Addie is so small and she was supposed to be in mommy’s tummy a little while longer, she has a little trouble breathing. The tube is helping her breathe. It makes it easier for her,” Oliver explained. “I talked to Addie’s doctor today, though, and she said that your baby sister is doing so well that she won’t need that help for much longer.”

“So, she is going to be okay?” Emmy asked.

“Yes, she is going to be fine. It all looks scary, but it’s just to help her,” Oliver replied. He noticed William’s look and cast him an encouraging smile, wordlessly telling him that he wasn’t just saying it to soothe Emmy’s worries, but that he meant it. He turned his gaze back to Felicity and Addie, smiling at the sight. “Addie and mommy are both going to be okay.”

“And what’s that other tube for?” Emmy continued to ask.

“That’s because she has trouble drinking mommy’s milk, so the doctors have to help her.”

Tommy turned his head and frowned at him. “Can she do anything?”

Oliver chuckled though Tommy’s question almost made him a little sad. He didn’t even want to imagine how all of this had to feel for him. He had had so many problems with adapting to Millie’s introduction into the family, and now Addie had joined the family and his mommy had to be in the hospital for some time, away from him. The little boy would need a lot of extra attention these next days, Oliver assumed. He would take him to see that stars once more though he could be interested in the hospital too. He had developed a love for playing doctor – the children’s version of course – lately.

He didn’t get to answer, though, as Emmy already turned around to him and tickled her little brother’s calf.

“She’s a baby, Tommy, she is not supposed to do anything yet,” she explained. “Millie couldn’t do anything, either.”

As if she knew exactly that she had been talked about, Millie squealed happily and waved with her arms in excitement.

“So why the second tube?” Emmy asked.

“The tube allows the doctors to feed Addie. That way mommy’s milk can go right into her tummy,” Oliver explained.

Emmy shot him an incredulous look. “Through her nose?”

Oliver nodded his head. “Yes.”

“That doesn’t work, daddy,” Emmy replied, shaking her head.

“Actually, it does work,” William told her.

“How?” Emmy asked.

“The tube goes from her nose through her body into her stomach like this,” William explained, moving his forefinger along Emmy’s paranasal sinuses and cheek to her neck, down her throat and over her chest to her stomach. “The doctors put Felicity’s milk in something like a syringe and push it into the tube and from there it gets right into her stomach. That way, when she is too tired too drink, she still doesn’t have to be hungry.”

For a moment, Oliver was surprised about how well William could explain this or that he knew about it like that at all. He doubted that he would have known that when he had been fifteen, and he still couldn’t explain it now. He guessed Samantha must have explained it to him once. Since she was a nurse, she certainly knew the right words to explain this even to children.

“Can I eat through my nose the next time, too?” Emmy asked, looking back and forth between her father and her brother. “Like soup maybe?”

“No,” Oliver replied firmly, shaking his head. “Absolutely not.”

Emmy made a face, but then she shrugged her shoulders. “Okay.”

They stood there a moment longer before Dr. Manning went to Felicity, probably telling her it was time for Addie’s examination. Oliver could see the glint of sadness in Felicity’s eyes when she put Addie back into the incubator.

“Why is Addie in a glass coffin?” Emmy asked. “Is she Snow White?”

“It’s not a coffin,” Oliver explained absentmindedly, wondering how he could cheer Felicity up because he knew it was hard putting Addie back into the incubator after holding her for the first time. He had had trouble with that, too. “It’s a bed that is really warm which is important for babies. And it protects her.”

“From monsters?” Tommy asked.

Oliver smiled at his son. “Kind of.”

“Cool,” Tommy replied. He looked back into the room behind the window and immediately struggled out of Oliver’s arms when Felicity approached the door. “Mommy’s coming.”

As soon as Felicity opened the door and stepped out into the hallway, Tommy ran towards her with spread arms. Chuckling, Felicity picked him up from the floor and lifted him into her arms. Her face screwed up in pain for a moment, but she didn’t let it stop her.

“Hi, buddy,” she said, kissing his cheek over and over again. “Are you alright?”

“When are you coming home?” he asked.

Felicity smiled at him quietly. “I don’t know yet. Soon, hopefully.”

Tommy sighed and rested his head on his mother’s shoulder. Emmy stepped closer to her and wrapped her arms around her waist, snuggling her cheek against her stomach. When Millie started reaching out her arms for her too, Millie and William joined into the hug, too.

“All my babies are here,” Felicity said with a smile, wrapping her arm around William’s back. “Well, almost all of them.”

“Not long and we get to do a fully family hug,” Oliver explained, stepping closer to his wife and kids and hug all of them together for a moment. With a sigh he added, “Until then, I suggest we move this to mommy’s room, so mommy can rest a little.”

Felicity immediately turned her head to shoot a look at Addie. Dr. Manning was standing at her incubator, reading values from the monitor and taking notes for the clinical record. Oliver put his hand to the small of her back, stroking up and down gently.

“You’re going to see her again soon,” Oliver promised. “Use the time to catch some rest. Breastfeeding is going to be exhausting.”

Eventually, Felicity nodded. “Okay.”

“Can I stay a little longer and watch Addie?” Emmy asked as Oliver loosened himself out of the hug.

“The hospital is no playground and-“

“I could take care of her,” William suggested.

Oliver looked at his older son. “Are you sure?”

He nodded. “Sure.”

“Okay, then you stay here,” Oliver agreed. “Tommy, what about you?”

“I stay here, too.”

Felicity let Tommy down, stroking her hand over his hair and he hugged her once more shortly before he let go of her to take his brother’s free hand. Oliver lifted Millie out of William’s arm and kissed her cheek.

“We are in room 314, down the corridor and to the right,” Felicity explained. “Then it’s the second room on the left.”

“Alright,” William replied, nodding his head.

“And you guys listen to your older brother,” Felicity told Emmy and Tommy.

“Yes, mommy,” they both replied in chorus, giving her their best angels’ eyes.

Felicity looked once more at where Dr. Manning was now examining their youngest daughter. When Oliver put his arm around her waist, she turned her eyes away with a sigh and let Oliver lead her away. They walked in silence, Felicity’s head resting against his shoulder. Oliver tightened his hold on her as he kissed first her and then Millie’s head.

When they got back into Felicity’s room, she crawled into bed and with a long sigh rested her back against the headrest. Her head leaned back against the cool wall as she closed her eyes. Oliver watched her for a moment, seeing the exhaustion on her face. She had to be even more tired than he was. She had slept for a couple of minutes every now and then during the last hours, but just like him, she had to be sleep-deprived and given how much more energy the last hours had cost her, she really needed some rest.

Oliver sat down on the edge of the mattress next to her. Immediately Millie crawled out of his lap and to Felicity. She sat down on her thighs, looking at her mommy. Though Felicity wrapped her arms around Millie’s back, she didn’t open her eyes. Millie’s face screwed up in discontent at that.

“Mama.”

That made Felicity open her eyes immediately. Her face brightened with a wide smile. Millie smiled happily.

“Did you just say-“

“Mama,” Millie repeated, holding onto the hoodie Felicity wear and pulling herself into a standing position to nuzzled her mother’s face.

With a wide smile, Oliver watched Felicity wrapping her arms around Millie even more tightly. She kissed her cheek, peppering kisses all over her rosy skin. Oliver’s face almost hurt from smiling so much. Finally, a kid that said _mama_ first, and like always Millie had the perfect timing. If she had a superpower, then it was always making it easy for the people around her. She had been the perfect baby during the last months, making it so easy with her hardly demanding manner and her always content attitude it had been so easy. That she had chosen this moment to finally say her first word – nobody would be able to convince Oliver that these two syllables might have been just a coincidence – and make it _mama_ only proved it once more.

Felicity whispered some words to Millie that Oliver couldn’t understand. Then she peppered her daughter’s face once more. Millie squealed happily and started playing with Felicity’s hair, leaning forward and resting her ear against her mother’s chest.

“It’s almost bedtime for you, hm?” Felicity asked, stroking her hands over Millie’s back slowly. She leaned her cheek against Millie’s head and looked at Oliver. “You should take the kids home soon.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He and Felicity had agreed that he should go home with the kids and take them back here early tomorrow. They had asked all their family and friends who were already so excited to meet the newest addition to the Queen and Arrow family to delay all visits to tomorrow. Today had been just for Felicity, the kids and him. Tomorrow, with Millie’s first birthday, they would all come here to celebrate a little and welcome Addie into the family, too.

“I can’t believe we are spending the night of our wedding anniversary in different beds, never mind different buildings.”

Felicity cocked her head. “We did the same two years ago.”

Oliver frowned, but then remembered that he had watched a play of William’s drama group in Central City that had been staged that day. He nodded slowly. “Right.”

Felicity took his hand and put it to Millie’s back, resting her own hand on top of his. She smiled at him quietly and stated, “We have been through a lot, you and me.”

Oliver nodded. “Do you think it will ever get easier?”

“Not sure,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders, “but I think life wasn’t that bad for us. Sure, we had bad times, but compared to others we are still blessed. I guess our life is just a little crazier, sometimes in good ways and sometimes in bad. We managed to make it through the seven-year-itch without any damage, though. It was hard, but we made it.”

“We did have good times, too,” Oliver said.

Felicity nodded. “Absolutely.”

Oliver smiled, turned his hand to lace his fingers with Felicity’s. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied with a smile. “And I am sure that whatever life holds in store for us, we will handle it somehow.”

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed, nodding his head.

They smiled at each other for a moment longer until he got up and leaned over her, kissing her gently in a way to celebrate them, their family and their seven years of marriage.


	237. Celebrating life

Slowly stroking her hand up and down Addie’s back, Felicity hummed the melody of some lullaby its text she couldn’t remember. Immediately the squirming newborn that rested against her chest calmed down. Her cries turned lower until they were nothing more but quiet whimpers. Felicity smiled, kissing the top of her baby’s head without stopping to hum that melody for her.

Addie was more than 36 hours old now, and she had probably progressed more that other babies did in weeks Felicity thought to herself with pride. She knew in the back of her mind that other babies progressed a lot in their first weeks, too. She had seen it with her other kids after all, but that wasn’t the point. Addie had managed to start holding a stabile body temperature, so the doctors had been able to move her to the warming bed. She had started breathing completely on her own without any help and without any unnormal pauses in breathing. Her loud cries when she was unhappy were proof of how strong she already was despite the early, rushed and dangerous start into her life. If that wasn’t a reason to be proud, what was?

“Now, you just need to start drinking more,” Felicity whispered to Addie. “Then you are going to be completely fine, and daddy and I can take you home with us.”

Felicity knew they hadn’t been in the hospital for long yet, but she was already eager to go back home. After Oliver and the kids had left the evening before, he had come back once more when Emmy, Tommy and Millie had been asleep to bring her a few things. With her own, fresh clothes it was a lot more comfortable, but it was still far from the way she’d feel at home. She missed the kids and Oliver, especially at night when she was lying in that foreign bed all alone. Besides, she knew they needed her at home, especially her boys. Oliver couldn’t sleep well without her, and Tommy was such a mama’s boy that every day alone with daddy was going to make him miss her even more. She could just pray that there wasn’t going to be a thunderstorm because that would freak out all of them, Oliver and the kids.

Sighing, Felicity leaned her cheek against Addie’s head and closed her eyes. She knew that she had to focus on Addie right now. As the youngest and the one with the most health problems, she needed her the most for now. It wasn’t fair, at least not to Millie and Tommy who weren’t able to understand as much as they should to know that there was no choice for her here, but to be with Addie. She was sure Emmy and William, who probably both understood a lot better, found ways to distract their little siblings.

“Your siblings are really amazing, you know?” Felicity whispered to Addie. “William is the best big brother you could have wished for. He is also your godfather, so he will always do his best to make sure you have everything you want. He is going to play with you and help you walk and do everything to make sure you have a lot of fun in your life. Then there’s Emmy. She is probably already super excited to meet you. She loves babies, and she is going to give you the best cuddles. Sometimes, she is going to be a little pushy, but she really means well. You know when you are older, and you feel you like there are things you can talk about to mommy and daddy, you can surely talk to her. Until then, you just make sure you tell me when you need more rest from her and mommy is going to find something else for her to do, okay?”

Felicity smiled. William and Emmy really were the best siblings you could wish for. They had had a lot of training in gaining siblings, though.

“Tommy is great too,” Felicity continued after a moment. “He might need a little time to get used to you at first. He isn’t the easiest guy in the world. He always needs time to get used to people, but once he lets someone in, he loves them with all his heart. I am already nosy to find out how Millie will react to you. You know, she’s still a baby herself, so it won’t be easy, but she is such a sweetheart. She really was the easiest of all your siblings. After Emmy and Tommy, it was crazy having another baby because they really broke mommy’s and daddy’s nerves at times. Millie really was the exception. It would be really nice of you if you could be as easy on us as she was. It’s okay if you won’t be, though. As long as your first word is going to be _mama_ , we are fine. You know, I am spoilt with Millie now, and I really want one more child to say _mama_ first, especially because I can annoy daddy with it all his life.”

She had seen the happiness in Oliver’s face when Millie had called her _mama_ yesterday. Felicity knew he had been happy for her. Yet, she didn’t doubt that if the circumstances had been different and she hadn’t suffered through weeks of depression before and hadn’t had to put her youngest child back into the incubator just then, he had complained to Millie about not saying _dada_ first. After all, he had been teasing her for years that Emmy’s first word had been _dada_ , while Tommy’s had been _Emmy_.

Felicity shot a look at her watch and sighed. All their family and friends were going to show up soon to celebrate Millie’s birthday. Felicity didn’t want her baby’s first birthday to pass by without a party, and since she wanted to be part of that party no matter what, they had decided to move the party to the hospital. Oliver had bewitched the nurses to turn both their eyes blind to this.

“Mommy has to go now,” Felicity whispered. “You know, it’s Millie’s birthday today, and we are going to celebrate. I wanted to take you with me, at least for a little while, but I am not sure if that isn’t too much for you. You just got out of the incubator after all, and meeting all of your family and all of your friends would be a big deal. I am sure they will all drop by and visit you, though. You know, they don’t come here just for Millie. They come here for you too.”

Slowly Felicity got up from the armchair next to Addie’s warming bed. Careful of the feeding tube, she put the newborn back into her bed and leaned down to kiss her forehead.

“Mommy’s going to be back in two hours to feed you again, okay?”

Felicity knew she was only a few feet away, in a room just down the corridor. Yet, it broke her heart every time when she had to leave Addie. She just loved having her baby around her because she knew she was safe then. Of course, rationally Felicity knew Addie was safe here, too, but it was an emotional thing and she couldn’t do anything to keep it from being on her mind.

As she strolled down the corridor to her room, Felicity did her best to gather herself. She didn’t want to seem as messed up as she felt, especially in case the kids were here already. She’d do her best to push away her worries and fears to celebrate Millie’s birthday. It had been bad enough that she had missed the birthday cake she had gotten this morning, the one Emmy and Tommy had baked with Thea when she had distracted her the day of Addie’s birth. Oliver had sent her a photo, though.

Felicity hadn’t reached the door yet when a voice behind her called, “Hey, mama bear.”

Smiling, Felicity turned around, and she couldn’t contain an amused chuckle at the sight of Roy approaching her with more than a dozen of balloons in all shades of pink in each of his hands.

“Hey,” she replied. “On your way to your goddaughter’s birthday party?”

“Absolutely,” he replied. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her closely, whispering into her ear, “How is the mother of my favorite goddaughter feeling?”

Felicity sighed. “Good, even if I am turning a little crazy here. You know, Addie is just down the hallway and yet I miss her like she is a thousand miles away.”

Roy rubbed her back comfortingly. “Don’t worry. I understand, and I don’t even have a child. At least not yet.”

“Thea told you,” Felicity said, loosening herself from the hug and smiling at her friend. “Are you excited?”

“You have no idea how much,” Roy replied, then frowned for a moment and finally chuckled. “Or maybe you do.”

Felicity smiled. “I am so happy for you guys. You are going to make great parents.”

“I hope so,” Roy replied, “and to prove that to myself I am going to go in there and make sure my little goddaughter has all these balloons for her party.”

“She is probably going to try eating them,” Felicity told him, remembering that Emmy and Tommy had both tried to do it during their first birthday party.

Roy wrapped his arm around her shoulders and led her into the hospital room. Felicity only made it over the step of the door before she stopped, looking around the decorated room. Her jaw almost dropped. The entire room was put into pink and gold colors with a lot of glitter, definitely Thea’s and Donna’s doing. There was a small table with all kinds of sweets and drinks, another table with a mountain of gifts for the little birthday girl. If it wasn’t for the bed and the smell of disinfectants, nobody would think this was a hospital room.

“Wow,” she said, catching everyone’s attention.

The small room was already filled with people, so many it was actually kind of claustrophobic. That was though Oliver and the kids as well as the Diggles were still missing. Their friends from Central City were already there, though, as well as her mother, Quentin and Laurel, Curtis and Paul and Thea and Roy of course. Felicity was taking a step more into the room, intending to take a closer look around, but before she could do so, there was a flash of light and in the next second Barry had already wrapped his arms around her.

“Are you and Addie okay?” he asked.

“We are fine,” Felicity replied for everyone here loud enough to hear. “Thank you for your gift by the way. Addie is getting stronger by each hour, I swear. It’s amazing. It’s like you can see her develop right in front of your eyes, and it’s just wonderful.”

“She’s a Queen. Queen-ladies are the strongest,” Thea explained.

“Hey, don’t forget there is some Smoak in there, too,” Donna replied. “I am sure a huge part of her strength comes this side, too.”

One after one, they all hugged her and congratulated her to the new family addition. Everyone told her how much they had been thinking about her and Addie since they had known about what had happened and how they had been sure everything would be alright. It was a little overwhelming, but these kind of moments, when everyone was there and change was in the air, always were.

“Can we see Addie?” Caitlin asked when she released Felicity from their hug, rubbing her hands excitedly. “I am so excited to meet my little goddaughter.”

Felicity smiled, sitting down in the middle of the bed with crossed legs, and shrugged her shoulders. “You can go see her, but only through the window. You know, they only allow parents and siblings in that room. The babies there need their rest and, yeah…”

Donna sat down at the edge of the mattress next to her, putting a hand to her thigh. “Are you alright, Baby?”

Felicity chuckled, squeezing her eyes shut. She rubbed her hands over her tired face and released a sigh. “I am fine. I am just so tired. I haven’t really slept since Addie was born.”

“Maybe we should move Millie’s birthday party home,” Quentin suggested, “and give you time to rest and-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted him quickly, shaking her head. “No, absolutely not. I don’t want to miss Millie’s birthday, even if I am going to fall asleep during the party.”

Iris smiled. “We’d be the last to blame. All in here together have three kids which is still less than you have.”

Felicity frowned for a moment, so Laurel offered, “Dad has two, Donna one and the rest of us none.”

“We know you are tired when Laurel has to do the math for you,” Cisco commented with a chuckle, earning himself a playful slap against the back of his head from Laurel.

“Really, it’s not that big of a deal,” Quentin assured her. “Just tell us when it’s getting too much and we are cleaning things up and give you some room.”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied, “but I am sure it’s fine. I will just take a break and go see my little girl whenever I feel I need it.”

There was a long moment of silence before Barry, who stood near the window, said, “Birthday girl is coming.”

“Well, then let’s everyone give mama bear some room with her girl before the party starts,” Roy suggested, winking at her.

“Yes, let’s visit my sweet, little granddaughter,” Donna agreed, taking Quentin’s hand and pulling him towards the door. “I can’t wait to see her.”

While everyone left, Laurel came over to her and hugged her. Felicity sighed, wrapping her arms around her friend and closing her eyes. Laurel stroked her hand over her head comfortingly like she had done dozens of times months ago when she had been depressive.

“I am here if you need me,” she whispered before she loosened the hug and smiled at Felicity. “Okay?”

Felicity nodded. “Okay.”

Laurel smiled at her once more before she turned around and left. As the door closed behind her, Felicity leaned back into the pillows and closed her eyes, taking some deep breaths. She was happy with how things were developing with Addie, even if she wished it was getting better even more quickly. She couldn’t wait to be out of here and to have Addie being fit enough to get out of here. She knew it all needed time, but it was difficult. She was needed here, and she was needed home. Despite what Oliver had told her, Felicity still struggled with the blame. Being depressive could factor into causing premature births. Now the blame over this caused her to feel depressive again.

It was a viscous cycle, and Felicity knew it. When she had been depressive during her pregnancy with Tommy, she had pushed Oliver away because she had felt guilty for not being as happy as she had felt she should be. It had caused her to feel even more guilty and hence push Oliver away even more. It had been a cycle of guilt and isolating herself. Of course, the blame had been part of the depression already, but it had made it worse at the same time.

Felicity took in a deep breath before she released it through her lips slowly. This wouldn’t happen to her again now. She wouldn’t let the guilt pull her down. As much as she knew it was never the only reason to bring the depression back, blaming herself could favor another depression to develop. This wouldn’t happen now, though.

When there was a knock at the door, Felicity smiled and opened her eyes.

“Come in,” she asked.

Only a moment later, the door opened. Oliver was standing in the door in crouched position. Millie’s hands were wrapped around his forefingers tightly as she was holding onto them for balance. She giggled happily at the sight of her mother. Emmy and Tommy behind her, both holding one of William’s hands, wanted to walk past her and Oliver to greet their mommy, but William kept them close to him.

“Hey, there’s my little birthday girl,” Felicity said, sliding from the bed and spreading her arms for her baby girl.

Millie squealed happily and started walking. Oliver followed her to make sure she wasn’t losing her balance. He only stopped a little away, just enough, so Millie could grab Felicity’s hand when she reached out her arm for her baby. Millie grabbed Felicity’s finger and crossed the rest of the distance.

“Hi, Sweetie,” Felicity whispered, hugging Millie closely, and kissed her baby’s kiss. “How’s your birthday going?”

Millie smiled happily. “Gi-gi.”

“I heard you also got cake,” Felicity replied. “Did you get cake?”

Millie nodded, and snuggled herself close to her mother. “Mama, gi-gi.”

Felicity smiled, lifting Millie into her arms and kissing her baby’s cheek once more. As she sat down on the edge of the mattress, she told her, “You know, everyone came here for you today. All your friends and family came here to celebrate you. Okay, they came here for your baby sister, too, but mostly for you because today is your day. We are going to have a big party here. Do you like the decorations? Do you like this?”

When Felicity pointed at the balloons, Millie giggled and giggled too. Felicity chuckled. Yes, Millie did like them.

Oliver approached her and kissed the corner of her mouth. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Felicity replied, smiling at him. “How did our little girl’s birthday go so far?”

“Great,” Oliver replied, pointing up his thumbs. “She loves it. I told her she was supposed to have a party, though. What happened with that? I mean… where is everyone?”

Felicity chuckled. “They went to see Addie as long as there is time, but they should be-“

“ _Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you_ ,” the voices of their friends came from the hallway right before they entered the room, John and the rest of the Diggles between them, “ _Happy birthday, dear Millie, happy birthday to you_.”

As everyone applauded for their little girl, Millie leaned her head against Felicity’s shoulder with an almost shy expression on her face. Roy lifted her from Felicity’s arms to congratulate her before she was handed around to everyone who wanted to hold her.

Oliver sat on the edge of the bed next to Felicity, putting his arm around her shoulders loosely. Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder and looked at him.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked.

“Yes,” Felicity replied. When Oliver perked up his eyebrows in response, she sighed. “I was a little… down… because of Addie, but I am better now.”

“You’re sure?” he asked.

Felicity rested her chin against his shoulder looked at him. “I am tired and I know Addie is doing well, but I am still worried about her. With Millie’s birthday today, we are celebrating life, though, and we can also celebrate Addie’s life in the back of our minds. All of our kids are alive and safe. They are all fine.”

“They are,” Oliver confirmed and kissed her temple. “We have every reason to celebrate. We are blessed.”

Felicity looked at her kids. William and Caitlin were talking about their little goddaughter, while Emmy was talking to Sara about Baby Connor and Baby Addie. Tommy was on John’s arms, telling him some story Oliver must have read to the kids last night. Thea was holding Millie, who was now wearing a crown made of paper, while they were looking at the gifts on the table. All of her kids were here, smiling happily.

With a sigh, Felicity leaned more against Oliver, wrapped her arms around his waist and nodded, “We are really blessed.”


	238. Coming home

“Sweet onesie,” Dr. Manning said and smiled as she leaned closer, holding a clipboard pressed to her chest. “I am always relieved to see when parents can take their experience lightly.”

Oliver smiled and stroked his hand over Addie’s tummy. “It was a gift from my sister. When I told her that I was going to get Felicity and Addie home today, she gave me this for her. I thought I’d surprise Felicity with it.”

“A nice surprise,” Dr. Manning replied. She smiled at him for a moment longer before she asked, “Are you ready to take Addie home?”

With a low sigh, Oliver turned his gaze to his baby girl. Addie was still tiny compared to her siblings at that age. When Dr. Manning had told them yesterday that they could take Addie home today, Oliver hadn’t been sure how to feel about that. He couldn’t wait to have his two girls at home because it just didn’t feel like home if part of the family was missing, especially when it was Felicity. On the other hand, he was worry about Addie. He knew there was no rational reason for it. The little girl was doing well. They had even been able to remove the feeding tube a couple of days ago, and Addie hadn’t lost weight since. The thought of taking her home where there weren’t any doctors in case something went wrong just made him nervous.

“I know it’s not going to be easy,” Oliver said quietly. “I am even a little nervous, but I just hope it will wear off soon.”

“That is all you can do,” Dr. Manning assured him, “and in case you and Felicity feel something is wrong with Addie, just take her here and she will be checked through thoroughly.”

Oliver nodded, looking at his baby girl, who was sleeping peacefully. “I know.”

Addie was fine. She had spent the last days in Felicity’s room already and had only been taken to the nursery and not even the NICU where she had stayed for the first week, just to make sure she was thoroughly protected. It didn’t make much difference if she was in Felicity’s room or at their home. He knew he’d have some more restless nights ahead of him, nights that he would spent enjoying to the beat of Felicity’s heart and listen carefully for Addie’s breathing over the baby monitor, making sure there wasn’t any unevenness or stops.

“Is Felicity in her room?”

“Yes, we agreed that I’d pick up Addie, and then we’d go home together,” Oliver explained, nodding his head.

“Then tell her I wish all of you well,” she said and nodded to the door. “I gotta go to see some of my other patients.”

“Sure,” Oliver said. “Bye.”

“Bye.”

Dr. Manning turned around and headed to the door. Oliver puckered his lips for a moment before he said, “Dr. Manning?”

The young doctor turned around, looking at him with perked up eyes. “Yes?”

“Thank you,” Oliver said, “for everything.”

“Sure,” Dr. Manning replied. “I love to help little human beings and their parents. I got the best job there is with helping people.”

As Dr. Manning left, Oliver looked after her. She was right. Helping people was a satisfying job. After more than ten years in the nightly safety business, he knew that. There were still days, more than he dared to admit, that he wished he could do even more than to contain the harm that’s being done and do something more to protect this city. He wanted to help making people’s lives better apart from crime. He wanted to give children and young adults perspective, helping this city to get back to old glance. This was the place where four of his five kids were growing up after all. Today was not the right day to think about that though, Oliver decided with a look at Addie.

“Come on, baby girl,” he whispered, lifting Addie out of her bed and into the car seat. “Mommy’s already waiting for you.”

While he was carrying Addie to Felicity’s room, he told her that everyone at home was already very excited to have her there, but that for the first two or three hours, she would have their home and her parents all for herself. William was back in San Francisco with his mom and would only be back at the weekend. Emmy was in kindergarten. Tommy was visiting his good friend and toddler crush Isa, and Millie was spending time with her godmother. That way Addie would have all the time in the world to get used to the unfamiliar environment.

He knocked softly at Felicity’s door and quickly opened when she asked him to get in. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, smiling at him. Her messily braided hair was put over her shoulder. She was wearing one of his hoodies that he had brought her last week when it had been clear that she had to stay a little longer. Her packed bag was next to her on the bed.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Oliver replied as he quickly crossed the distance to her. “Ready to go home?”

“I can’t wait,” Felicity told him with an exhausted sigh though she was smiling with relief.

Oliver put Addie’s car seat to the floor. He framed Felicity’s face with his hands and stroked his thumb over her cheekbones. While he was leaning in, she put her fingers around his wrists and straightened up, so their lips met halfway in a gentle kiss. Oliver sighed against her lips, moving impossibly close to Felicity.

He had been worried about her. After Addie’s birth, she had been different. She had been quiet and exhausted which he knew she had every right to after these exhausting hours. Yet, he had immediately worried that there was something more going on. Even if she hadn’t admitted it, Oliver just knew that she had been blaming herself for what had happened. With her history of depression, that had rung some warning bells for him.

Once the stressful days of Addie’s birth and worrying about her health as well as Millie’s birthday had been over, she had been able to really sleep, though. Since then, she had become a lot better. He had worried for nothing it seemed.

When Addie released a low cry, their lips parted. Both of them looked at their youngest daughter, who had her eyes opened now.

“Hey, what’s going on there?” Felicity asked.

She already bent down to lift the baby seat to the bed, but Oliver quickly did it for her. He knew she had had some trouble with the scar of the C-section, at least in the first days after Addie’s birth. Felicity shot him a short look like she was telling him that she was okay, but Oliver only shrugged his shoulders in response.

“Are you as excited to go home as daddy is excited to take you home?” Oliver asked Addie, tickling her stomach.

“Nice onesie,” Felicity said with a smile. “Did you get it for her?”

“Thea did,” Oliver replied. “I thought it was a nice surprise.”

“It’s great,” Felicity responded with a sigh. “Finally.”

Oliver nodded. Finally, they could take their baby home with them. It was a hug step given how far away this moment had seemed when Felicity had woken him up in the middle of the night and told him that her waters had broken. Just like he had told Dr. Manning, he was excited, even if nervous.

“I suggest we fill in the papers and get you two home,” Oliver suggested. “I prepared some delicious new pasta recipe that you are going to enjoy. The kids I love it.”

“I guess it includes a lot of cheese then?”

“Indeed.”

Felicity smiled. “Sounds great. The food here is terrible.”

Oliver chuckled, knowing too well that she was right since he had been in here in the hospital more times than he could count. “I know.”

He took Felicity’s bag, while she was lifting Addie’s car seat from the mattress, carrying it in the crook of her arm. As they both turned to the door, Oliver put his arm around her shoulders, and Felicity rested her head against his chest.

“This is the last time we will take a baby home,” Olive said, frowning slightly. “We spent so much time here that… Is it weird that I am feeling a little nostalgic?”

Felicity angled her head back to smile at him. “Don’t be too nostalgic. A year ago, we thought it was the last time we were going to take a baby home too, and now look where we are standing.”

Oliver chuckled. “Well, we took measures to prevent that from happening.”

“To quote the urologist, there is never a one-hundred-percent chance.”

“I was provoking things with calling Addie a wildflower, but saying the vasectomy will fail and we will have another baby is okay?” Oliver asked with a wide grin, cocking his head.

“Hey, I am just trying to comfort you,” Felicity replied and kissed his cheek. She patted his abs gently before she added, “but just so we are clear – if we are having another baby, we will never have sex again.”

“I feel that would be as hard for you as it would be for me.”

“I doubt it.” Felicity kept her hand at the door to make sure Oliver couldn’t open before she added with lowered voice, “When I have delivered five babies, I am sure I am numb down there anyway and wouldn’t care at all. Just so you know.”

With a chaste peck to his lips, Felicity opened the doors and stepped out of the room. She shot a look back at him over her shoulder, winking, and Oliver smiled at her in response. He was more than relieved that they were able to joke about this. Addie had been a huge surprise, one he couldn’t believe was true from time to time. Luckily, he had the rest of his life to let this realization settle.

 

 

Felicity let herself sink even deeper into the pillows. Spreading her arms, she moved them over the soft sheet and enjoyed the familiarity that gave her the feeling of home that she had missed so much in the last two weeks. She hadn’t even realized how much she had missed her bed before she had fallen face-down into it. She had missed absolutely everything about home. She had missed her furniture, Oliver’s delicious food, the kids, literally just everything.

Years ago, when she had just left college, she had thought she’d never settle anywhere for long. She had thought she’d just travel around, looking for the next great chance that was offered to her. It had seemed like a nice idea, never staying at a place for too long to actually make too many connections there. She hadn’t wanted to end up like her mother, being left alone with a child, linked to one place forever without unable to afford much.

Yet, here she was, feeling connected to this city more than she had ever felt connected to any other place. She loved her home. She loved her family. She loved her city. She couldn’t imagine living anywhere else but here or any other way than she lived right now. So many things had gone different from what Felicity had imagined for her life, but she was grateful that it had. She really didn’t want it any other way.

When Oliver stepped into the bedroom, Felicity lifted her head from the mattress and asked, “Are they asleep?”

“Everyone’s asleep,” Oliver replied with a nod and waved with the baby monitor in his hand. “And as I can see, you got Addie asleep, too.”

“Easy,” Felicity replied with a smile. “She fell asleep as soon as she was replete.”

“Sounds good,” Oliver replied, put the baby monitor to his nightstand and took off his shirt. Winking at her, he headed into the bathroom.

Felicity turned onto her side, looking at the videos on the monitors that showed her two youngest children being fast asleep. When she and Oliver had realized that they would need monitors for both of their youngest, they had read a couple of blogs until they had found a good monitor that allowed them to watch both of their babies. Oliver would take care of Millie, and Felicity would take care of Addie at night. Lucky Oliver, Millie was mostly sleeping through the night.

With a low sigh, Felicity focused on the video that showed Addie. She was sleeping peacefully even if she looked terribly lost in her crib. It had broken Felicity’s heart a little to leave Addie in her room. Even though Addie had only started sleeping in her mother’s hospital room once she had moved out of the warming bed a couple of days ago, she had grown used to having her little girl with her all night. She and Oliver had moved all their kids right into their own rooms when they had been released from the hospital despite everything they had been told at the hospital and in the parental blogs Oliver had loved for some time about co-sleeping. Felicity felt tempted to move Addie into their bedroom, but wouldn’t that be unfair to the other kids and-

“What are you thinking about?” Oliver asked when he came back into the bedroom.

“Nothing,” Felicity replied, shaking her head without looking away from the monitor.

“I know that’s not true,” Oliver told her, leaning into the doorframe and smiling at her. “Wanna know how I know?”

Slowly, Felicity turned her head to look at him. Propping her head up onto her hand, she chuckled and said, “Okay, how?”

“You are doing this crinkly thing with your eyebrows,” Oliver explained, gesturing at her forehead.

Immediately, Felicity moved her fingers to her forehead, feeling the wrinkles there, and smiled. Of course, Oliver knew. He knew her like she was a part of him.

“What’s going on?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shot another look at the baby monitor before she looked at Oliver again. “Why didn’t we take Emmy into our room after she was released from the hospital?”

“We tried,” he answered without hesitation. “We wanted to take her with us, but she always threw herself into a crying fit. She wanted to be alone. After that, we didn’t try with the other kids. Are you thinking about moving Addie in here?”

“You have thought about it, too?” Felicity asked back, hearing it in the tone of his voice.

Oliver nodded. “I know I won’t have a calm minute in the next few nights.”

“Neither will I,” Felicity agreed. She looked at the monitor once more before she sighed and rolled onto her back. Staring at the ceiling, she said, “We can’t take her in here, though. We’d have all the kids in our bed within a night and wouldn’t get them out until in half a year.”

“Which would clearly disturb our sex life that I hope to pick back up as soon as the doctor gives his go.”

Felicity chuckled, shaking her head. “You are insatiable.”

“I am when it comes to you.”

When Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver, she carefully scrutinized the expression on his face. He was biting down on his jaw, his jaw and arms slightly tense. His eyes were roaming over her body hungrily. He didn’t need to say anything for Felicity to know what he wanted. As his eyes met hers, Felicity smiled and beckoned him to come to her with a simple come-here-movement of her finger. Oliver stepped closer to the bed with a grin, knowing that she knew what he wanted.

“Are you sure you are okay?” Oliver asked, coming to stand in front of the bed. “The scar is not aching? No -?”

“Just take care of my breasts. They are feeling a little tight,” Felicity replied, once more beckoning him to come closer. “Now, come here.”

With a wide smile, Olive crawled onto the bed and towards her. Felicity spread her legs, allowing Oliver to place his knees between hers. He pushed his arms around her waist and rested his head on the top of her chest. Felicity put her arms around his shoulders and stroked her fingers through his hair.

“I missed this,” Felicity whispered and closed her eyes. “I really missed this.”

As long as she had been pregnant, or at least once the belly had shown, this position had become highly uncomfortable for both of them. With the two close pregnancies, it felt like forever like they had slept like this. It was Oliver’s favored position for sleep. He loved listening to the beat of her heart. When they had just gotten together, it had been the only way Oliver had been able to sleep calmly.

Oliver hummed. “Way too long.”

“I think I am going to enjoy sleeping like this tonight and every other night until I got over the fear of losing Addie,” Felicity replied with a sigh and kissed the crown of Oliver’s head.

“Only until then?” Oliver asked, resting his chin on the top of her breasts and scratching his stubble over her sensitive skin.

Felicity puckered her lips. “Or maybe until you don’t want it anymore.”

Oliver chuckled. “Prepare to never sleep in any other position for the rest of your life then.”

Smiling, Felicity took in a deep breath. “I would like that.”

He smiled at her for a moment longer before he kissed the top of her right and then the top of her left breast and said, “My little friends, I am so going to cherish you when I get you to back. I miss you.”

Felicity laughed out loudly while Oliver was continuing to pepper kisses all over the top of her breasts. She arched her back, pressing her body more against his in the process. Despite having born a baby just a couple of days ago, she already felt the prickling feeling of lust between her thighs. Her legs wrapped around his hips on own accord.

Oliver’s lips traveled from her cleavage over her neck to her lips. They kissed slowly, sighing into each other’s mouths. Felicity stroked her hands up and down Oliver’s naked bed, enjoying the familiar play of his scars against her fingertips. She could have sex with him right now if it wasn’t for her knowledge that it was just too early.

Before she got to even deepen the kiss, though, she heard the door to their bedroom opening. Terrible memories of Emmy coming in right at the time both of her parents had been bathing in pleasure returned to Felicity. She pushed at Oliver’s shoulder to make him roll off her though it wasn’t necessary as he was already rolling off her.

Felicity lifted her head from her pillow and looked towards the door. She smiled when she saw Tommy standing in the opened door. He was carrying Emmy’s pink giraffe she let to him sometimes, looking at his parents. Her smile widened.

“Do you want to sleep here, Buddy?” she asked. Tommy nodded eagerly, so Felicity lifted the blanket and patted the mattress between her and Oliver. “Then come here.”

Tommy closed the door behind him and quickly ran over to the bed. He crawled onto the mattress until he was lying between his parents, snuggled to his mother’s body. Felicity smiled, kissing his dark hair. Oliver snuggled up to Tommy’s back, wrapping his arm around Felicity’s waist loosely.

“Night,” he whispered and kissed Felicity’s lips before he switched off the light.

Immediately Tommy snuggled closer to Felicity, and she tightened her arm around him.

“Don’t worry,” she whispered to him and closed her eyes. “Mommy’s here.”


	239. Queen of drama

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Today, just a short chapter, but in case you didn’t see it,[here’s the new spoilers post for the chapters 251 to 300 ](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/165155612165/time-for-a-story-spoiler-alert)_

“You guys know that you don’t have to call every five minutes to check on us, right?”

Feeling kind of caught at her mother’s question, Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She checked her watch, figuring that her mother was right. It had been less than ten minutes since she had left the house. Yet, it was already the second time she called to check on whether her mom got things handled with Millie and Addie. She trusted her mom. She knew she was an amazing grandmother, and she had Quentin to help her if her two youngest granddaughters were going to make trouble.

It was just that this was only that this was the first time since Felicity had taken Addie home after two long weeks in the hospital that she was leaving her baby girl alone. Well, technically, Addie wasn’t alone of course. She just wasn’t with her which felt wrong to Felicity. The memories of seeing her baby girl attached to tubes and monitors that helped her stay alive were still too present in her mind.

“Did you get Addie to fall back asleep?” Felicity asked nonetheless.

“She is sleeping against my chest, and she’s perfectly fine,” Donna replied. “There is really no reason to worry. Addie is fine, Felicity.”

Felicity squeezed her eyes shot, nodding to herself slowly. “Yeah, I know.”

“Enjoy Emmy’s big evening.”

“Thanks, Mom,” Felicity replied, “and if anything is going on-“

“I will call you,” Donna promised, “but you don’t have anything to worry about because there won’t be anything going on here.”

Again, Felicity nodded to herself, letting her mother’s words sink in. She knew she was right. Addie was doing great. Dr. Manning wouldn’t have let them go if it was any different. Felicity just needed more time to really understand that. Maybe when her baby started walking she’d understand.

When Felicity opened her eyes and saw her boys returning from the coat check, she quickly added, “I gotta hang up. I see you later.”

“See you later.”

As soon as Felicity had hung up, she pushed her phone into her purse and smiled. Tommy let go of Oliver’s hands and came running towards her.

“Here, mommy, look,” he said. He held out his hand, showing her the four silver tickets for their jackets. “We have to give them back to get our jackets back.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over her son’s dark hair. “That’s cool. You have a lot of responsibility when you get to keep these. You know they have mommy’s favorite coat now.”

“I know,” Tommy said proudly and pushed the tickets into the pockets of his pants. “I take good care of them.”

“I know you will,” Felicity replied, smiling back at her son.

“Ready to see our sister rocking this play?” William asked Tommy.

“Yes!” Tommy replied excitedly. “She’s the best mermaid.”

“That she will be,” William agreed, nodding his head.

Felicity watched the two boys talking about the play of Emmy’s kindergarten class today. They were acting a shortened version of _The little mermaid_ , and Emmy had gotten the role of the mermaid herself. This was the first of the two evenings that they were presenting the play. Tomorrow, when they would redo it, Donna, Quentin and Laurel would go to see her.

While Felicity was still watching her sons, smiling at how excited they were about their sister’s big day, Oliver leaned closer to her. His arm wrapped around her waist as he kissed her temple. With whispered voice, his lips brushing against her ear, he asked, “Did you call your mom again?”

Releasing a low sigh, Felicity leaned against him. “I couldn’t help myself.”

As she looked up at Oliver’s face, she saw the shift of emotions on his face. While he wanted to tell her that there was no reason to worry, he did worry, too. Neither of them had caught much sleep during the last night. It was like if Addie even just coughed, they were sitting up in bed, panicked something could go wrong.

“Is everything alright at home?”

“Everything’s fine,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “We need to get used to the fact that she’s fine.”

“So much easier said than done.”

Felicity smiled, putting her hand to Oliver’s cheek and stroking her thumb through his short stubble. She knew how scared he had been when she had been taken to the OR. He had lost so many people in his life, so many more than she had. Losing their daughter would have been unbearable for both of them. It was the love they had for each other that allowed them to slowly get over their fears and push past it.  It would take some time, but it was going to be okay eventually.

Felicity turned towards Oliver, putting her arms around his neck. He ducked his head and kissed her gently, brushing his lips against hers for a few times before pressing down more fully. His lips caught her bottom lip between his for a moment. Only a moment later, he released her.

“Come on, Tommy,” William said to his littler brother and took his hand. “We go ahead and search for good seats.”

“In the front row?”

“Absolutely,” William replied.

While the two boys, went ahead, Oliver pulled Felicity back against him. He pecked her lips once more before he said, “We need to enjoy this evening for Emmy’s sake. The kids have been coming up short a lot lately.”

Felicity nodded, releasing a sigh. “I know.”

With Addie’s surprisingly early birth and her stay in the hospital for two weeks as well as the last week of getting used to a life with a newborn, there hadn’t been much time for the other kids. The little time there had been, they had needed for Millie. If they had thought having a newborn and a baby that was just a few days older than a year was tough, the reality was a thousand times more difficult. When one baby had been challenging, two were at least thrice as hard to handle. Besides, it meant twice as many diapers.

“Emmy is the little mermaid,” Oliver said. He framed her face with his hands, gently stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. “She is so excited for this.”

“I hate that I couldn’t learn her text with her.”

“I learned her text with her,” Oliver replied, “and there really wasn’t much to learn since they are doing a lot with music. You know, they are only six years old.”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. With a sigh, she lifted her hands to Oliver’s wrists and looked at him. “We should take the kids to Big Belly’s later.”

“Even if that means leaving Addie with your mom for even longer?”

Felicity sighed once more. “My mom got it handled, and Addie is fine.”

“Addie is fine,” Oliver repeated.

“And today is Emmy’s big day,” Felicity added. “We need to completely focus on her.”

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed. He kissed the tip of her nose, her cheek and finally her lips. “Besides, we didn’t have burgers in a long time.

“Exactly,” Felicity agreed. “I would love a good burger with chili-cheese fries and extra garlic.”

Oliver groaned. “That’s going to be a great night for me then.”

With a chuckle, Felicity leaned closer to him. “As soon as we are allowed to have sex again, I am going to limit my consumption of garlic. Until then, I am going to use every opportunity to eat more of it.”

“If someone deserves it, it’s you,” Oliver replied. Then he pecked her lips gently. “Let’s go find our sons.”

Felicity smiled, nodding her head. “Let’s go find our sons.”

Oliver wrapped his arm around her waist as they headed to the aula. Felicity leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. She repeated the words in her mind once more. Addie was fine and today it was Emmy’s day. It was true, so she’d make sure her kids felt the same way.

 

 

“Emmy, you were by far the best little mermaid I have ever seen, and I have seen a lot of little mermaids,” Oliver explained, raising his milkshake for a toast to his oldest daughter. “You were brilliant, so I am sure you are going to be a great actress one day.”

Emmy giggled. “I don’t want to be an actress, Daddy. I want to take over our company.”

Felicity winked at her daughter over the edge of her milkshake. “Good girl.”

“But-“

“You really want to take over the company?” William asked. “Are you that interested in computers?”

“I am, but mommy says I am not allowed to play with her computers,” Emmy replied, pouting a little bit. “When I am older, I want to work in mommy’s office or in Curtis’ lab.”

“And where is mommy going to work then?” Felicity asked, cocking her head at her daughter.

“You’ll be old and grey and not working anymore at all,” Emmy replied, chuckling like Felicity had asked the stupidest question.

“So nice of you,” Felicity murmured. While Emmy, William and Tommy continued talking to each other, Felicity leaned closer to Oliver. “How many mermaids did you get to watch exactly? And is that a metaphor for pool sex?”

“Do you want one of my fries?” Oliver asked, not-so-subtly changing the subject.

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him, taking a bit of the one of his fries he offered nonetheless. She shot him a look, making him know that she wouldn’t forget about this question, but all Oliver did was grinning innocently in response. With a shake of her head, Felicity chuckled and let it go. She knew she wouldn’t approach this again until they could have sex again, so she could tease him and pretend to be a little angry and he would ask her to make it up to her and-

“You are blushing,” Oliver whispered to her, leaning so close that his lips brushed against her ear. “What are you thinking about?”

“Maybe I tell you tonight, or maybe I won’t.”

When William cleared his throat, wordlessly letting them know that their sex talk hadn’t gone by completely unnoticed by him. Oliver quickly put on a smile and asked, “So, Emmy, are you going to enjoy presenting this play once more tomorrow?”

Emmy nodded, her blonde curls jumping up and down around her face. “Granny and grandpa are going to watch and Aunt Laurel, too.”

Felicity nodded. “Aunt Thea and Uncle Roy wanted to come too, but they can’t. There is a big event going on at Verdant tomorrow.”

“Can I have Verdant?” Tommy asked.

“You mean when you’re older?” Oliver asked.

Tommy nodded. “Emmy gets the company. I get Verdant.”

“You know Verdant is Aunt Thea’s and Uncle Roy’s club now,” Felicity explained, smiling at the fact that their kids were trying to preserve the estate like it was no big deal. “I am sure they want to give it to their kids.”

“What kids?” Oliver asked, frowning at her.

Felicity rolled her eyes, biting down on her tongue. “They got married earlier this year. It’s going to happen eventually.”

“Oh god, don’t remind me,” Oliver replied, pushing some fries into his mouth.

“Don’t you want Aunt Thea to have babies, Daddy?” Emmy asked.

Oliver hesitated for a moment before he said, “It’s just weird for daddy. I mean how would you feel if Addie was suddenly having babies?”

Emmy frowned. “Daddy, Addie’s still a baby herself.”

Felicity chuckled, rubbing her hand over Oliver’s back while telling her daughter, “Daddy’s just always getting very emotional when big things happen to the people he loves.”

“Even when it’s good things?” Tommy asked.

“Even when it’s good things,” Felicity replied, nodding her head.

There were times that they told the kids about some of the terrible things that had happened in their parents’ lives. They wanted to make them know that, as wonderful as life was right now, there had been hard times too, but you could get through them if you had people to lean on. Today, was no of those times, though.

Felicity stroked her hand over Oliver’s bicep and said, “You know how they say hard shell, soft core. That’s exactly the way daddy is.”

Emmy giggled. “And he said I was a drama queen.”


	240. Giving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT NOTE: I changed some of the canon things that happened in 4x19. Since Tfas is supposed to mostly follow canon until the backhalf season 3 and this chapter is written from Felicity’s point of view, I figured you could think that maybe Oliver lied to Felicity. This is not the case. I just liked Merlance in season 1 except for the crappy ending and the flashbacks in 419 that felt a little like retconning their story for the sake of some last LL & OQ romance for me. Since it didn’t feel quite natural to what we saw in the season 1 finale and the first episodes of season 2, I decided to ignore those flashbacks.

Felicity couldn’t remember how many times she had thought that she couldn’t fall more in love with Oliver. She had definitely thought it once she had first realized that she was in love with him. Then she had thought it once they had shared their first days together as a couple. She had thought it when they had gotten married. She had though it when she told him she was pregnant with their first child, and he had managed to erase all her insecurities about that upcoming adventure with his excitement and his trust in her. She had thought it when-

Anyway, she had thought it a lot of times to say the least. Yet, there had always come a moment that she had realized that she did love him even more than she had before. With Oliver and her family, she had just come to realize that she could love so much more deeply than she had ever thought a human heart could.

Right now, Oliver was lying on the floor of Addie’s room. He had fallen asleep right there after trying to get Addie back to sleep. She had been crying for the last fifty minutes, and Oliver had tried, without much success at the start, to calm her down. They must have both passed out from exhaustion at some point.

Felicity sighed quietly. They had hoped that maybe Addie would be a sweetheart like Millie, who was always happy and always content. That hope had been frustrated quite quickly once they had taken Addie home. She was crying a lot, at least as much as Emmy and Tommy had. A few days ago, they had taken Addie to the hospital to check if she was alright, worried that maybe her crying fits came from some pain they hadn’t notice yet. According to Dr. Manning, Addie was perfectly fine, though. She was just a quite demanding baby.

When the doorbell rang and Addie started squirming on Oliver’s chest, Felicity quickly closed the door, hoping Addie wouldn’t wake up. She turned around on her feet and hurried downstairs quietly. She wanted Oliver and Addie to have the rest they needed.

“Hi,” she said a little breathlessly when she opened the door for Laurel and smiled at her friend. “Come in.”

“Where did I get you away from?” Laurel asked with a chuckle as she stepped in and hugged Felicity shortly. “You seem a little breathless.”

“I was upstairs. Oliver and Addie just fell asleep.”

“Oh, I hope I didn’t wake them.”

Felicity shook her head. “If they wake up, it’s not your fault. Addie’s just not a fan of sleeping for longer than an hour.”

Laurel gave her friend a comforting look. She knew that life with five kids, two of them not even eighteen months old, was quite difficult. Felicity had told her all about it during a long phone call as recently as yesterday. She had ranted about it so long that Laurel had barely gotten to tell her that she had a date today, never mind ask her if she could borrow a pair of shoes for said date.

“Come on,” Felicity told her, nodding towards the stairs before going ahead. “I didn’t get a chance to get the shoes downstairs.”

“Where is everyone?” Laurel asked, following her upstairs. “I am not used to your house being so quiet.”

Felicity chuckled. “I know. It is kind of weird. Thea and Roy took the kids to the zoo, though. One of Emmy’s new friends from class is staying overnight. Her father dropped her off here this morning already, so I am kind of glad Thea and Roy took the kids for most of the day. It gives Oliver and me time to take some deep breaths.”

“I don’t doubt that,” Laurel replied with a chuckle. “Do you-“

“Enough from me,” Felicity interrupted her friend as she let her into her dressing room. “How about your date? Are you excited?”

“Nervous would be the better way to put it,” Laurel replied. When Felicity looked at her, perking up her eyebrows, Laurel sighed and shrugged her shoulders. “I am thirty-seven years old, and my last date has been like forever ago. Besides, we both know how terrible my last real relationship ended.”

Laurel sucked in a deep breath and lowered her eyes. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, unsure what to say about that. She knew that when Laurel referred to her ‘last real relationship’ she meant Tommy. It had been almost ten years since he had died now, but she had never really gotten into any other relationship since. She had had some dates, and she had even dated some guys for a few weeks or maybe even a couple of months, but she had never felt comfortable enough to call the men she had dated her boyfriends or anything like that.

“It’s not going to be like with Tommy again,” Felicity said quietly. “What happened back then was crazy because it was a crazy situation. You didn’t really know what you want because there seemed to be unfinished business with Oliver which held you back from going all in with Tommy and trusting your feelings for him.”

“Until it was too late,” Laurel added.

Felicity nodded quietly, repeating Laurel’s words, “Until it was too late.”

She knew from Laurel and even more so from Oliver what had happened back then. She knew that Tommy had broken up with Laurel, thinking she belonged to Oliver. She also knew Oliver had tried to talk to him at first, but he had eventually decided to take a shot and try with Laurel again himself. They had slept with each other, and Tommy had seen it, causing the friends to get into a fight. It had been terrible for everyone involved, mostly Tommy of course. Before anything could have been worked out between the three former friends, the Undertaking had happened and killed Tommy.

Oliver had once told Felicity that he didn’t know what would have happened if Tommy hadn’t died. Nobody could know that. Even before his friend’s death, Oliver had already felt like sleeping with Laurel again had been a mistake. He had told her that only a few days or weeks before he had been saved from the island, he had hallucinated Laurel, and she had told him to come home. He had thought that that had been the reason why he had still tried so hard to get back with her despite everything. He had wanted to prove to himself that he was better than the man he had showed her when he had cheated on her repeatedly, even with her own sister. He had been holding onto the past instead of accepting that it was gone and move on.

Laurel had told Felicity something similar years ago. She had felt like her relationship with Oliver had ended too abruptly without any fights or any chance for them to get to the conclusion that there was just no going back. She had tried to grieve Oliver, but hadn’t gotten the chance to do so since she had been too angry about his unfaithfulness, too devastated about her sister’s death and too distracted by her parents’ divorce and her father’s alcoholism. When he had come back, a completely different person, she had always hoped that there was another chance for them. She hadn’t realized that what they had had, had already been long over and had been impossible to repair, maybe even not worth repairing in the first place. Because of that she had missed that her real chance of happiness, a guy who genuinely cared about her and a guy she cared about deeply, had been right at her side the entire time.

Neither Oliver nor Laurel had been able to look each other in the eyes after Tommy had died. Oliver had waited for Tommy’s funeral to speak at his grave and had left to go back to Lian Yu right after. He had only talked to Laurel again after Felicity and John had forced him to come back to Starling, and even then it had taken a few more years until they had managed to become friends.

“What happened back then was terrible,” Felicity continued after a while. “What you and Oliver did to Tommy was… I know it wasn’t cheating, at least not in your case. You and Tommy were broken up, and you had been with Oliver before. I understand that was difficult, but-“

“-we hurt him,” Laurel continued, nodding her head, “badly.”

Felicity nodded. “Probably. You deserve to be happy, though. It’s been ten years. The situation was difficult for everyone involved, and if you ask me, Tommy knew exactly that there was still unfinished business between you and Oliver. What happened, happened. You can turn back time, but you have to move on.”

Laurel had been hurt badly by Oliver, and she had hurt Tommy badly. She had to give herself the chance to fall in love with a better guy and love in a sincerer way herself. Now seemed to be the right time for that. Oliver had moved on from it a long time ago. How else would their family exist?

Laurel took in a deep breath and smiled at Felicity through the tears in her eyes. “I guess you are right.”

Felicity smiled encouragingly and handed Laurel the shoes she had asked to borrow, replying, “I usually am.”

The friends linked arms with each other, lightly chatting about where Laurel’s date was taking place, what she was planning on wearing and how she was going to do her hair.

“By the way, you didn’t tell me who-“

Felicity’s question was interrupted by the doorbell.

“Oh-oh,” Laurel said. “Are you getting your kids back?”

“No, Thea promised me that I could nap at least for an hour before she drops them off here again,” Felicity replies. “I think it’s going to be Rosalie’s dad. She forgot her favorite stuffed animal and can’t sleep without it, so he wanted to bring it over.”

When Felicity opened the door, she smiled at the sight of Liam Hendricks, Rosalie’s dad, holding out a plushy unicorn for her. Before Felicity got the chance to take it and thank Liam for dropping it here, the expression on his face changed to something else as he looked over Felicity’s shoulder. Turning her head back, Felicity saw Laurel looking at Liam with the same expression of recognition.

“Oh, right, you know each other from the office,” Felicity said, remembering that Liam had told her he was the new DA.

“Yeah,” Laurel replied, her smile widening.

“And we are going out tonight,” Liam added.

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. She shot a short look at Laurel once more before she turned back to Liam and took a closer look at him. He was a handsome man with dark, curly hair that framed his edgy face with the shining grey eyes. His cheeks were close-shaven. He wore an expensive suit that did nothing to hide the muscles of his tall, broad body. He was looking good, very good actually. Felicity was surprised she had missed that since-

When a voice cleared close behind her, she flinched slightly. Squeezing her eyes shut for a moment, she shook her head to focus back on her surroundings apart from Liam’s body and turned her head back over her shoulder with a smile. Oliver was standing right behind her, his chest now pressing to her back. He was looking at Liam, reaching out his hand for him.

“Hi, Liam,” he said.

“Hey,” Liam replied, shaking Oliver’s hand and holding out the unicorn for him. “I just wanted to drop this off for Rosalie.”

“Great. We will give it to her when my sister is back with her. She took the kids to the zoo.”

“Rosalie is going to enjoy it a lot,” Liam replied. He scratched the back of his head for a moment before he nodded to his car. “I gotta go. I have one more appointment before I can go home. Thanks again for taking care of Rosalie. Laurel, I’ll see you tonight.”

“Oh, I was just about to go too actually,” Laurel replied. She quickly stepped forward and hugged Felicity, whispering into her ear, “Wish me good luck.”

Before Felicity could do so, Laurel already let go of her. Side by side, she and Liam left to get to their cars. Felicity smiled, closing the door after them. She hoped her friend had finally found someone who could make her happy the way Felicity had found Oliver.

Felicity turned around, a smile on her face. Oliver stood right in front of her with his arms crossed in front of his chest, the plushy unicorn still in his hand. His eyes were narrowed at her, and he tipped his head forwards. Felicity perked up her eyebrows, grinning in amusement.

“What?”

“What was that?” he asked.

Felicity frowned. “What was what? Liam dropped off the unicorn for Rosalie, and it turns out he’s the guy Laurel is going to date tonight.”

“And that is why you had to look at him like a piece of meat that you want to devour?”

Felicity smiled. She couldn’t help it, but knowing that Oliver still got jealous after all this time, warmed her heart. Sure, jealousy had been an issue in their marriage once or twice. This kind of jealousy – this wonderful, teasing, lovely, unserious kind of jealousy – was something she’d never get tired of, though. She was sure there were husbands who didn’t even realize when their wives looked at a different man.

“You’re cute,” Felicity said with a smile.

Oliver puckered his lips. “I am not cute.”

“Yes, you are,” Felicity replied. She stepped closer to him and put her hands to his forearms, so she could straighten up onto her toes, nuzzle Oliver’s nose and peck his lips. “Very cute actually.”

Oliver grumbled. “You’re sure you don’t think Liam Hendricks looks cuter?”

Felicity brushed her lips against Oliver’s once more. “I doubt anyone can look as cute as you when you’re sleeping on the floor with our baby girl sleeping on top of you.”

When Felicity kissed Oliver once more, he loosened his arms from the tight hold in front of his chest and put them around her waist instead. He held her close as he responded to the kiss, deepening it. Slowly he turned them and started walking her backwards into the living room. He directed her around the couch, so he could make her lie down there, resting his body on top of hers. Felicity hummed against his lips, stroking her hands up and down his back.

After a long moment, Oliver propped himself up onto his forearms and broke the kiss. He smiled at her gently, bumping her nose with his playfully when he asked, “Do you want to nap a little?”

Felicity sighed. “I kind of want to, but I need to show you something.”

Oliver wiggled with his eyebrows. “I’m gonna show you mine if you show me yours, Mrs. Queen.”

Felicity chuckled and poked her forefinger into his side between his ribs. “No, not like that.”

Oliver made a pouting face, making Felicity smile. She grabbed her tablet from the couch table and moved under Oliver’s body, so she could sit up a little more straightly against the pillows. Oliver turned around on her, resting his back against her chest and his head against her shoulder. His body was encompassed between her legs, his hands rubbing up and down the outsides of her thighs gently. Just when he had gotten comfortable against her, Felicity found the data she had been searching for.

“Is that-?”

“The plan for a new charity program?” Felicity asked. “Yes.”

Oliver took the tablet from her, reading the notes she had taken for it. She waited patiently for him to tell her what he thought, her heart pounding loudly in her chest. She was almost a little nervous about showing Oliver what she had planned. Since she had taken over QI, she had been a lot less active in the foundation. She had let it run the way it was, making sure there was always enough money to spend on the projects that were going on and let herself be updated regularly. Apart from that, Thea and Oliver had taken care of the foundation since Felicity had had her hands full with the company already.

“It to raise awareness for prenatal depression,” Oliver stated after a while.

“Technically, it’s to raise awareness for depression in combination with pregnancy, whether it’s prenatal depression, postnatal depression or depression during pregnancy without the causal link. In addition to that, the program is supposed to help women and their families. I talked to some aid agencies that offer help as well as to some specialists to make sure the program is embedded with other programs and doesn’t come to nothing by informing without offering help. I know the foundation is actually working to capacity, but QI is working well and I think we can afford employing a few more people to do this project and-”

“Why are you justifying your decision?” Oliver asked with an amused smile on his lips. He angled his head back against her shoulder, so he could look at her. His hand squeezed her thigh gently, as he said, “If you want to do that, we are doing that. Of course, we are doing it. It’s a great project, one that’s actually a matter of heart for the both of us considering we have been personally touched by it.”

Felicity nodded, biting down on her bottom lip. When Oliver turned around, so their chests were pressing together, and he swiped his thumb over bottom lip to release it from the maltreatment of her front teeth, Felicity released a long sigh.

“I just don’t want to make this seem like I am… I don’t know… keep holding onto the past or like I am trying to make this about me or-“

Oliver interrupted her with a gentle kiss to the lips. His tongue moved over her bottom lip until she opened to him with a sigh, granting him entrance. Felicity responded to the kiss with the same gentleness Oliver showed her.

“This is going to be a great help for affected families,” Oliver whispered against her lips. “I am glad you had this idea.”

Felicity smiled. She took in a deep breath, released it and gently pecked his lips. “In that case I am happy and relieved.”

Oliver kissed the corner of her lips and peppered a dozen of kisses down her jaw and neck until he could rest his head against Felicity’s chest, listening to the beat of her heart. Felicity stroked her hand through his short hair, gently massaging his scalp. She closed her eyes, enjoying the quiet moment of relaxation.

“Do you know when you will go back to work?” Oliver asked.

“At the beginning of June,” Felicity replied in a whisper. “Addie’s going to be two months old by then. I am going to work from home a lot, at least one day a week and maybe some more hours on the other days. Now that I have this wonderful home office you created for me, that’s going to be a good compromise to satisfy the company and our family.”

She could feel Oliver smile against her neck in response. He kissed her pulse point, spreading his fingers against her ribcage. His stubble scratched her tender skin, making Felicity purr like a kitten.

“I am going to miss you,” Oliver whispered against the side of her neck. “I was so spoiled these last months with having you and the kids here.”

Felicity kissed the top of his head. “I know. I am going to miss you too. We just need to make sure we, as individuals as well as a married couple, won’t go short between the company, the foundation, our nighttime jobs, the kids and whatever other responsibilities we have.”

Oliver pressed his nose against her neck before he propped himself up onto his elbows to look at Felicity’s face. “Do you feel like we aren’t taking enough time for ourselves?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “Right now, I think everything is perfect. We have time for ourselves and for each other and for our kids. It’s great the way it is right now. I just don’t want to lose this.”

“We didn’t lose it in the last years, not even during our seven-year itch that was less an itch than an… I don’t know… Whatever. We didn’t lose it in the past years, we won’t lose it now,” Oliver said. “I promise.”

Felicity smiled and framed his face with her hands. She gently pulled him closer until their lips almost brushed against each other’s. “That’s all I needed to hear.”

Their lips met in an unhurried kiss, and Felicity smiled into it. She knew if Oliver promised her something, he’d do everything in his power to keep his promise. That and knowing that she herself would do the same of course, was all the reassurance she needed. Their lives would be busy, and there would always be times that they wouldn’t have much time for each other, but as long as they had at least moments of enjoying some time just for the two as they did right now, it was going to be fine. It was more than fine actually. It was perfect.


	241. Nice change

“Here, I got mommy’s chocolate,” Emmy told Oliver, holding out two bars of chocolate with mint cream filling. Once Oliver had taken the bars from her and put them into the cart, she held three more bars out for him and added, “And I got chocolate for William, Tommy and me.”

Oliver cocked his head at her, perking up his eyebrows. All Emmy did was smiling back at him innocently. When Oliver rolled his eyes and reached out his hand, his daughter’s smile widened even more. She put the chocolate bars into his hand, and Oliver put them into the cart to the others. He looked at his shopping list.

“You can get some yoghurt with fresh fruits,” Oliver suggested.

“And chocolate pudding?”

“Don’t you think the sweets are enough?”

Emmy stepped closer to him, leaning against his leg and wrapping her arms around his hips. “Daddy, please.”

Again, Oliver rolled his eyes. With a deep sigh, he nodded his head and admitted defeat, though. He knew he couldn’t resist Emmy when she looked at him with her big, blue eyes, pleading for him to spoil her. It was why he usually preferred doing the shopping on his own. He didn’t get tempted buying so much unhealthy food if the kids weren’t there. Since the whole family had decided to do the shopping together, Oliver couldn’t have helped himself, though. He wondered how Felicity was getting along with Tommy and Millie though he guessed Tommy let Emmy do the pleading and distracted their mommy in the meantime.

Addie’s low cry called his attention towards her. She was squirming slightly, so he put a hand to her stomach and slowly rubbed his hand over it. He pushed the cart towards the shelves with the detergent, whispering to Addie, “Don’t tell mommy, I gave in so easily. She’s going to rave and rant with me if she finds out and-“

When his cart bumped against something, Oliver quickly looked up.

“I am so sorry,” he hurried to say, seeing the woman in front of him whose cart he must have crashed accidentally. “I’m really sorry. I wasn’t looking and-“

“It’s okay,” she said, looking up from her groceries. Her eyes radiated recognition and her smile widened. “Oliver, hi.”

Oh, shit! Oliver bit down on his tongue, avoiding making any sound. He looked at the woman in front of him closely. She was beautiful, tall with long legs and dark hair. She was what he guessed had been his type before he had met Felicity. Problem was that he couldn’t remember her at all. He had no idea if they had just met on a party and flirted or if they had made out or maybe even had had sex. God, he couldn’t even remember her name.

“Hi,” he said, trying to sound like he knew exactly who she was. “We haven’t seen each other in like forever. I mean it must have been… years probably, right?”

The woman in front of him grinned in amusement. Cocking her head at him, she asked, “You have no idea who I am, do you?”

Oliver opened his mouth, almost about to reply that of course he knew who she was until he realized that it was probably hopeless. He puckered his lips, pushing one of his hands into the pocket of his jeans. “Sorry?”

She chuckled, shaking her head. “It’s fine. I guess I have changed a lot. Adelaide Cox.”

“My wife is going to kill me.” The words escaped Oliver before he could have thought about them twice. When Adelaide Cox cocked her head in response he explained quickly, “This is my youngest daughter. Her name is Adelaide. If my wife finds out that I had sex with someone whose name is Adelaide-“

“Woah,” Adelaide interrupted him, holding out her hands in front of herself defensively. He chuckled quite nervously. “We did not have sex.”

“Okay, but we made out and-“

“Nope, no making out either,” she replied, shaking her head.

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “We didn’t?”

“No, not at all.”

Oliver frowned slightly, looking her up and down. How could he have not made out with her? She was quite hot and, like he had noticed from the start, exactly the type of girl he would have fallen for back in his Ollie-days as Felicity would call it.

Adelaide chuckled, shaking her head. “We attended the same high school. I was the nerdy girl with the big glasses and freckles.”

“Oh, thank god,” Oliver replied, releasing a long sigh. “I am sorry. I panicked for a moment.”

“I have noticed,” Adelaide replied.

If a few more seconds had passed, he would have probably realized himself that it had been unlikely that he wouldn’t have remembered that there had been an Adelaide he had made out with or anything. He thought about the girls he had been very thoroughly when he and Felicity had searched for baby names, especially after he had forgotten about Madeleine. Besides, as much as he had slept around and changed partners in the past, he hadn’t been _that_ bad. Of course, he could remember the name of the women he had been with.

“I am sorry for not recognizing you,” Oliver said sincerely. He scratched the back of his head uncomfortably. He guessed the reason he hadn’t recognized her had been the very fact that she had been a nerdy girl as she had called it and not one of the party girls he had rather spent time with. “I am trying to be better than I used to be.”

Adelaide smiled, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s been high school, and I kind of made the best of myself.”

“You look stunning,” he told her.

“And I am still very smart,” she added with a chuckle.

“Which is even more important,” Oliver replied with a smile.

“You know I almost wouldn’t have recognized you either,” Adelaide explained. “I mean… I would have assumed were surrounded by a crowd of women instead of buying groceries, never mind enjoying the company of a really sweet baby.”

“This is like a really normal moment to my life.” Oliver chuckled, but it ended in a sigh. “Everything else has been a long time ago.”

“New life style?”

“Yes.” Oliver nodded. “I got married, to a nerdy girl by the way. I have children, five to be exact. I have a nice house in the outskirts and take care of the kids and our home while my wife is earning the money.”

“Wow, hundred and eighty degree about-turn.”

“Yes.” Oliver nodded. “I know it seems crazy given the life I have lived before and-”

Adelaide smiled, shaking her head. “If someone knows how much people can change, it’s me.”

“Daddy, I’ve got them!” Emmy called out, stumbling into the passage with her arms full of puddings and yoghurts.

“Oh, hold on a second,” he asked her and quickly took some of the tubs away from her. He put them into the cart and nodded for Emmy to come closer then. She stepped in front of him, leaning back against her daddy’s legs. Oliver put his hands to Emmy’s shoulders, saying, “Emmy, this is my friend Adelaide. We’ve attended high school together.”

“Hi,” Emmy said, shaking Adelaide’s hand. “My sister’s name is Adelaide, too. We only call her Addie, though.”

“Addie. That’s a nice nickname,” Adelaide replied with a smile. “My family and friends always called me Deedee, but I started hating that nickname at one time.”

“Their mommy and I are into nicknames that end on -ee,” Oliver explained. “Emmy, Tommy, Millie and Addie all have names that allow nicknames like that.”

“But William doesn’t,” Emmy replied.

Oliver nodded. “That’s right.”

“Why-“

“Dada!”

Oliver turned around, finding Felicity walking towards them with Millie walking in front of her, her little hands wrapped around Felicity’s forefingers. She squealed happily when she saw her daddy, continuing to walk towards him until she could wrap her arms around his legs.

“Hi, Sweetie,” Oliver said, lifting Millie into his arms and kissing her cheek. When she yawned full-heartedly, he chuckled. “You are so tired.”

He sat her into the kids’ seat of the cart and turned back around to Felicity. When he watched the expression on her face as she was scrutinizing Adelaide carefully, he cleared his throat.

“Adelaide, this is my wife Felicity. Felicity, hon, this is Adelaide. We attended high school together,” he explained and leaned closer to Felicity to he could whisper into her ear, “I never slept with her, made out with her or anything like that.”

Immediately, Felicity’s facial expression changed to something more relaxed. It was almost like she was pulling in her horns and turn into a nicer version of herself. Oliver smiled. Just two weeks ago, they had been through something similar, just that their roles had been reversed back then. She had been checking out Liam Hendricks, the new DA, and he couldn’t have helped but feel this slight stitch of jealousy that she looked at anyone in a way that he felt should be only for him.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” Felicity said, shaking Adelaide’s hand.

“Felicity as in Felicity Smoak?” Adelaide asked, narrowing her eyes slightly.

Felicity smiled. “Yes though it’s actually been Felicity Queen for a few years already and-“

“Felicity Megan Smoak, class-of-2009-at-MIT-Felicity-Smoak?”

“Uhm…” Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, but she nodded. “I am afraid the answer is yes.”

“Oh my god!” Adelaide gasped, shaking Felicity’s hand much stronger now. “I am such a fan. I started MIT in 2008 after I finally got a grant. You are amazing!”

“O my god, you went to MIT too?” Felicity asked.

What followed was probably the fastest exchange of college experience Oliver had ever witnessed, ‘fastest’ referring to the speed of speech rather than its depth. One of the women in front of him named a professor or a class, and the other just finished her sentences. Oliver tried to follow, but there were so many names he didn’t know and they were talking so fast that it was impossible. When they started talking about tech then, he unwound.

It was weird how many things had changed in the last years. This was the first time since ever probably that a girl from his past was having a crush on Felicity instead of him, though. Oh, how the times changed things!

When Addie released a low cry, Felicity stopped talking mid-sentence. She looked at her youngest daughter and pushed the pacifier back into her mouth. Though Addie stopped crying, she still seemed restless.

“I would love to talk some more, but my babies need to go home,” she explained.

“Yes, of course,” Adelaide replied. “I am just so happy that I got to meet you. It’s like a dream come true. If I hadn’t lived under a rock for the past years, I guess I could have known that you are leading QI. I kept an eye on the developments, but never on the company politics. It’s just so cool that I got to meet you.”

“Awww, I am so touched by your reaction,” Felicity said, holding her hands to her heart. “I barely ever get to know people who are as excited about computer stuff as me. Like not even at QI people are that into tech stuff. I couldn’t talk about anything else all day.”

“Hey, you could just call me if you want to meet up and talk,” Adelaide suggested, reaching into her purse and pulling out a business card. “I’d be happy to see you again.”

Felicity took the card with a smile, nodding. “That’s great. Thank you so much.”

“Mommy, can we go home now?” Tommy asked, leaning against Felicity’s legs.

“Yes, of course,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. She looked back at Adelaide once more. “It was nice meeting you. See you soon.”

“See you soon.” Adelaide turned to Oliver, smiling at him. “You hit the jackpot with her. I hope you know how to appreciate that.”

“Oh, he does,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, leaning into Oliver’s side and stroking her hand over his chest gently. “He’s-“

“Mommy,” Tommy whined.

“Right,” Felicity hurried to say, stroking her hand over her son’s hair. She looked back at Adelaide, smiling. “I will have to postpone raving about what a perfect husband Oliver is when we see each other the next time.”

“You absolutely have to,” Adelaide agreed. “See you.”

“See you,” Felicity replied, waving at her.

They headed towards the checkstand even though they still hadn’t all the groceries on their list. Oliver would have to finish the shopping later without the kids. It was the better alternative compared to finishing it now and having at least two of four kids starting to cry.

“You know, I would have almost killed you when you told me her name. Lucky you, you never slept with her though… maybe unlucky you since she’s hot and smart. Like when I die, I would definitely want you to be with her. I had no idea you knew such nice people,” Felicity whispered, leaning closer to Oliver. “Like most of the people we met from your past are unbearable, especially the women. They usually can’t keep their hands of you like you are free a petting zoo.”

“First of all, you don’t get to picture scenarios where you die before me because it’s not going to happen,” Oliver explained, gently pinching her side. “And a petting zoo? Really?”

“Well, how else would you call that?” Felicity stroked her hands over his chest, disguising her voice as she said, “Oh my god, Oliver. It’s so nice meeting you again and, oh my god, you are so strong. You have to be training a lot, but I guess it’s because you are so broken after everything that happened to you. Let’s tell me everything you have been through, share your life and your soul with me and-“

Oliver interrupted her with a gentle kiss to her lips, smiling into the kiss. When their lips parted, he nuzzled her nose and whispered, “It’s cute when you’re jealous.”

“I am not jealous,” Felicity replied. When Oliver perked up his eyebrows, she added, “I am just annoyed.”

“Mhm, sure.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him. “Be careful, Mister.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed her cheek. “Don’t worry. I am all yours. I would tattoo your name on my forehead if that helped you.”

“Don’t tempt me,” Felicity replied with a smile. She put her arm around his waist and leaned closer to him. “I might actually like that.”

“I am sure I would look great nonetheless.”

“Yeah, and women would think it means rubbing themselves on you means they get lucky.”

“Well, they would get lucky, wouldn’t they? You are the one who should know the best.”

“No, they wouldn’t because I’d kill them and then I’d kill you for allowing it to happen,” Felicity replied. She kissed his cheek before she said louder, “Hey, kids, daddy just suggested something that earned him a night on the couch. Who wants to sleep in mommy’s bed?”

“Me!” Emmy and Tommy exclaimed at the same time, holding up their hands. Millie squealed, lifting her hands too.

Felicity turned her head to Oliver, winking playfully, and he chuckled. While Felicity and the kids discussed what fun they’d have with a slumber party like that, Oliver started putting the groceries onto checkout belt. His life had changed a lot, and apart from the occasional nights he got to spend on the couch, it had definitely changed for the better, and even those nights were a small price to pay for what he received in return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be posted Sunday. The title will be Moan for me. Yes, it’s smut.


	242. Moan for me

Felicity stayed in front of the closed door to Addie’s room, counting to ten in her head. When it stayed quiet in her little girl’s nursery, Felicity released a breath of relief. She could just hope that it would stay that way for at least two hours because that was the minimum of time she wanted to spend getting lost in everything her husband’s body would have to offer.

A jolt of pleasure shut through her core, and Felicity had to press her thighs together tightly. She bit down on her bottom lip, preventing a desperate whimper to fall from her lips. Eight weeks after her baby’s birth the doctor had finally attested her to be fit for sex again, and she wasn’t too proud to admit that she was desperate to feel him inside of her.

Smiling excitedly given the thrill of anticipation, Felicity almost danced her way through the hallway towards their bedroom. Emmy had been invited to a slumber party with Deepa and Rosalie at the Hendricks’ home, while Tommy was spending time with his godfather in Central City. They only had Millie and Addie to take care of, so she and Oliver had decided that he’d put Millie and she’d put Addie to bed and they’d meet in the bedroom again then to put their plans into action.

Almost about to just rip her clothes off and throw herself at Oliver, Felicity stepped into the bedroom. When she found him sitting in bed, leaning back against the headboard and reading something on her tablet, she frowned, though. Oliver wasn’t exactly reading that much and now seemed to be the worst timing for it. Yet, Oliver seemed completely focused onto his reading material, not even looking up when she closed the door behind herself.

“Hey,” she said, calling for his attention.

“Hi,” Oliver replied, still not looking up.

Felicity’s frown deepened, and she cocked her head at him. He couldn’t be serious. After eight long weeks without sex, she was fit and ready to go, and now he decided to start a new book? She cleared her throat.

“Hon?”

“Hm?” Oliver hummed, still not looking up.

“I am ready for sex.”

“Give me a second.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. ‘Give me a second’ was definitely not the reaction she wanted when she told her husband she wanted to ravish him and be ravished by him in return. Throwing away the tablet and telling her he got her full attention would have been much more appropriate. Puckering his lips and crossing her arms in front of her chest, she leaned back against the door and waited for Oliver to finally give her his undivided attention. She tapped the heel of her naked foot against the hardwood floor impatiently.

It took a few minutes – long minutes that Felicity pictured how she would pay Oliver back for his lack of attention here right now – until Oliver switched off the tablet and finally looked at Felicity. She perked up her eyebrows, wordlessly demanding an explanation. Oliver puckered his lips for a moment.

“Women moan during sex to move things along faster by propping up their guys’ self-esteem and making them come faster when they aren’t in the mood or are in  hurry or anything like that.”

“Aha,” Felicity replied.

Oliver narrowed his eyes at her. “Are you doing that sometimes?”

Felicity opened her mouth. She was about to reply that of course she had never ever faked an orgasm with him or even just tried to make him finish a little faster by exaggerating how great he was making him feel. After a short moment of reconsideration, she realized that a claim like that might seem a little farfetched after seven years of marriage, though. Seven years was a long time to claim that there had never been a misstep in their sexual life after all.

“How about we have really amazing sex with a lot of unhurried orgasms now and talk about the handful of times that there might have not been as many orgasms involved as you might think after?” Felicity asked, fluttering her eyelashes. “Please?”

Oliver looked at her speechlessly. His mouth opened and shut again repeatedly while he seemed to be trying to figure out what to say. His eyes radiated utter disbelief.

“You actually faked it with me,” he finally said.

“Okay, I said there were a handful of times. That’s not that much,” Felicity tried to soothe him. She quickly crossed the distance to him and sat down at the edge of the bed, holding out her hand and wiggling with her fingers. “See? Just five fingers, so five times at max. That’s not a lot given that we’ve been together for almost ten years now.”

“We’ve just been together for eight years,” Oliver corrected her, “so five times does seem like a lot. It’s almost once a year.”

“You should look for statistics about how often women fake orgasms. I think we are outstandingly successful and-“

“Did you fake it with other men, too?” Oliver interrupted her. “Or just with me?”

“Uhm…” Felicity stuttered. “I… uhm… I mean…”

Before she could make up a coherent sentence, never mind figure out what she wanted to say, the red lights on the baby monitor switched on and Millie’s cries resounded in the room, followed by a tired “Dada!”

“I gotta go,” Oliver stated shortly, got out of the bed and left the bedroom.

Felicity stayed sitting on the edge of the bed for a moment before she let herself drop onto the bed with a groan and stared at the ceiling. That was definitely not how she had pictured this night to go. She had wanted to be naked and covered by Oliver’s equally naked by now.

Puckering her lips, Felicity looked down her body. She was wearing one of Oliver’s white t-shirts that she often wore for sleep. If Oliver was too distracted by the realization that there was an error rate of 0.01% at max in their sex life, she would have to redirect his attention to where it should be. With a quick look to the baby monitor where she could see Oliver trying to put Millie back to bed, Felicity quickly rolled out of bed and hurried to the dressing room. She took off the t-shirt, dropping it to the floor carelessly, and exchanged it for one of Oliver’s white dress shirts. She rolled up the sleeves and only did up two buttons in the middle. She felt that would redirect Oliver’s attention to where she needed it quite successfully.

When Felicity heard Oliver whispering another goodnight to Millie, she quickly ran over to the bed, jumped into it and draped herself in the middle of the mattress. Listening to Oliver’s approaching footsteps, she twisted a strand of her hair around her forefinger. When Oliver stepped into the bedroom, she shot him an innocent look.

Oliver closed the door behind himself and crossed his arms in front of his naked chest as he asked, “Are you trying to seduce me?”

“Is it working?”

Felicity puckered her lips, trying to intense the cuteness of her facial expression. When Oliver just pursed his lips in response, she sighed and got up on her knees. Crawling to the edge of the mattress, she reached out her hands for Oliver. After a moment of hesitation, he left his place at the door and approached her. He didn’t lose his arms from the position in front of his chest, so Felicity put her hands to his forearms, rubbing her thumbs against his skin in small circles.

“I love you,” Felicity told him, “and I love having sex with you, whenever and however. You are great in bed or wherever else we have sex. You are an amazing lover. Really, if the sex wasn’t as great as it is, I would never occasionally fake it because that would be like shooting myself in the foot, you know? Since you are as amazing as you are, I can move things along when necessary without ending up in a life without orgasms, though. It really just happens occasionally and it’s always great. It’s just that sometimes-”

When Oliver burst out into laughter, Felicity stopped and frowned. He framed her face with his hands and captured her lips in a gentle kiss.

“I am so sorry,” he said, still chuckling between two kisses, “but I couldn’t resist.”

“You aren’t angry with me,” Felicity realized.

Oliver chuckled, peppering some more kisses to her mouth. “No, I am not angry. I know you too well not to realize that you faked it sometimes. I counted eight times, and I always made up for it hundredfold.”

Felicity puckered her lips. For a moment, she had really believed he was angry with her. Of course, she hadn’t thought it would end in a long fight or something like that. She knew Oliver too well to think that it would be something he couldn’t forgive or even joke about once he had understood that she had just done it for both of their well-beings. Yet, she had thought that he was angry or maybe even disappointed that she had done it without ever telling him. She should have probably known that he had only meant to tease her. Two could play this game, though.

“Well, if you counted eight times, I guess you can also assume the dark figure,” she said. “I mean… what’s the average? Fifty times as high?”

Oliver still pecked her lips between her words, but the pauses grew longer with each said word. Eventually, he pulled back a little, looking at her with a frown. His hands were still holding her face like she was his most precious treasure.

“You’re just trying to get back at me.”

“If that is what you need to tell yourself, baby.”

“You said I am great, amazing even,” Oliver replied.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. She let herself fall backwards into bed and started crawling further up the mattress. “I am going to go to sleep now since, you know, I don’t have to keep pretending anymore and-“

“You,” Oliver interrupted her, grabbing her foot and pulling her back down the bed until she way sitting on the edge of the mattress once more, “are not going to go anywhere right now.”

He leaned forward and kissed the side of her neck, moving his lips against her tender skin slowly. His cheek leaned in closer, his stubble scratching her in a way that made goosebumps spread all over her skin. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip to suppress a content purr.

“Ohh,” she moaned instead, purposefully exaggerating the sound to bug Oliver. “Oh, yes, just like that.”

Oliver growled against her skin. “I am going to give you _just like that_.”

He grabbed the lapels of the dress shirt she wore and ripped them apart. The two buttons tore off and fell clattering to the floor. He let his lips travel down her naked chest between her breasts as he kneeled down between her spread legs on the floor.

“Oh, Oliver.”

Felicity moaned, forcing herself to continue this game and stare at the ceiling instead of giving into the increasing feeling of pleasure. Oliver’s lips had reached her belly button by now. He dipped his tongue into it for a short moment before he continued his path downwards. His finger hooked into the waistband of her panties, pulling them down in one quick movement.

“Yes, Oliver, so hot.”

Felicity moaned once more. Her toes dug into the carpet slightly. She knew it was going to get harder pretending once Oliver’s lips were between her legs, his stubble leaving marks along the insides of her thighs. The only way she got to fake an orgasm was when time was on her tail, and she knew there was no other way out. Purposefully pretending to just pretend enjoying sex – hell, was that even a thing?! – was not something she’d done often apart from that one time they had run into his ex-girlfriend Madeleine. Back then she had been tired of shopping baby stuff with Oliver, and she had wanted to have sex. Since two of the women he had slept with had started dating women after, she had decided it was the perfect way to question his sexual skills. Of course, she had known that things didn’t work like that. It had just made the most sense for what she had wanted.

Oliver put his hands to her knees and gently pushed them apart. He leaned in closer and blew a breath against her sex. Felicity felt the need to press her thighs together, but Oliver kept his hands against her thighs, not allowing her to hide herself from him. He leaned his cheek against her thigh, rubbing his stubble against her tender skin.

“Oh, Oliver, you are so good,” Felicity moaned dramatically.

With a chuckle, Oliver rested his chin on top her knee. When Felicity propped herself up on her elbows, looking down her body and at him, she found him looking at her with a gentle smile.

“What?” Felicity asked.

Oliver grinned. “I just felt I should tell you that you are very lucky you can actually fake orgasms a lot better than that. I think you would have missed a lot of appointments if that was the best you got.”

“You think?”

“I do,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “Sorry, hon.”

“Well, who knows how I am really sounding when I enjoy sex given how often-“

When Oliver captured her clit between his lips, Felicity gasped for breath. Her back arched off the mattress, her hands clawing into Oliver’s short hair to keep him where he was. She wouldn’t admit it, at least not now since she had boosted Oliver’s sexual self-esteem enough for one day with telling him how great and amazing he was, but his lips could do magic on her.

Despite the firm hold she had on Oliver’s hair, he still leaned his head back to look at her. There was a smug grin on his lips that made Felicity roll her eyes.

“That is how you sound when you enjoy sex.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Shut up and get back to work.”

“I love it when you’re bossy,” Oliver growled.

Without any further encouragement, he went back to work as Felicity had said it. His lips kissed her entrance before they opened up against her wet folds and swiped his tongue between them in one long movement. Felicity felt a shiver running through her body. Her hands tightened in his hair even more, her fingernails scratching over his scalp.

Oliver continued teasing her with his tongue. He kept moving it between her folds without touching the most sensitive parts of her sex. His warm tongue created heat between her legs, and it seemed to spread all through her body. His hands stroked up and down her thighs. His fingers felt rough against her delicate skin, leaving goosebumps wherever they touched. Felicity was panting. Despite not having Oliver where she felt herself pulsating with need for him, his teasing tongue built up her pleasure quite successfully. Her skin felt like it was on fire. She was squirming, trying to get him where she wanted him most, but he wouldn’t let her move him.

When Oliver continued the teasing, Felicity pleaded, “Oliver, please.”

She barely got the words out. Her heart was racing in her chest, causing her to breathe quickly. The oxygen had just filled her lungs when she already needed to breathe out again to gasp for another breath. A thin layer of sweat covered her body. Eight long weeks without sex had made her desperate for relief. The bottled-up need and desire for her husband and for the pleasure he could make her feel were making her impatient and desperate for more.

Oliver pulled back slightly, kissing the inside of her thigh gently. “Everything comes at a price, Felicity.”

“Fine,” Felicity said with a growl. “You are a sex god, Oliver. You are so good at what you are doing that not having sex with you for a while makes me go insane. You are the best man I ever had in bed, and I would never even have fantasies of anyone else because they could never compare. There should be songs about how good you are in bed. There should be an Oliver-Queen-God-of-sex holiday. Now would you please make me come?”

Oliver chuckled and squeezed her thigh. “That was a nice speech.”

Felicity frowned, once more propping herself up onto her elbows to look at Oliver. He was grinning at her smugly, amusement sparkling in his eyes.

“But?” Felicity asked, perking up her eyebrows.

“But,” Oliver replied, his grin widening at the fact that Felicity had known exactly that he had some objection, “that is not what I meant.”

“Then what do you want?”

Oliver still grinned. His tongue darted out to wet his lips. His eyes stayed focused on Felicity’s though. Felicity whimpered quietly. Why did he have to be so sexy?

“I want you to moan for me,” Oliver whispered, his voice hoarse.

“Didn’t I give my best already?”

Oliver growled quietly at that. Slowly he lifted her right foot of the floor and put her leg over his shoulder. He did the same with her left leg and smirked at her smugly. He licked his lips once more before he said, “In that case I guess I have to tickle it out of you.”

Once more Oliver’s lips closed around her clit. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip to hold back a moan. She didn’t want to give in to Oliver’s conditions too easily. Yet, she couldn’t prevent a quiet whimper to fall from her lips. Oliver used the underside of his tongue to tease her clit, varying between rubbing and pressing down.

Felicity felt her pleasure building back up in like no time. She was panting again, her body feeling like it was on fire, a burning desire in the pit of her stomach. Her inner walls were already clenching rhythmically, aching for Oliver to fill her. Her feet roamed over his scarred back, looking for the right position to get a hold on him and anchor herself to him. She crossed her ankles and pressed her feet down between his shoulder blades. Reaching out her hands over her head, she braced herself against the headboard of the bed and used it to support herself as she thrust against Oliver’s mouth.

“Hm-hm,” Oliver hummed his disagreement and slid his right hand from her thigh to her stomach and rested his arm over her hips, effectively keeping her from moving against him. He rubbed his cheek against her inner thigh and smirked at her. “Give me what I want, and I am going to give you what you want.”

Felicity groaned. She didn’t want Oliver to have his triumph, at least not now. After he had teased her with pretending to be angry with her before, she felt it was too soon to just give into what he wanted. Besides, as much as she loved to complain about being teased in bed, she actually loved it. The more time Oliver spent on building her orgasm, the better her relief would feel.

Still a smug grin on his lips, Oliver buried his head back between her legs. His lips closed around her opening, his tongue teasing inside. Felicity gasped for breath, trying to move more towards Oliver, but his hold on her was too strong. As Oliver kept teasing her by letting his tongue open her and dip inside just a little before pulling back, Felicity grabbed his forearm and dug her fingernails into his skin.

He slowly licked from her entrance to her clit, barely grazing the little nub there, before he asked, “Want to admit defeat already.”

“No,” Felicity replied breathlessly. “Not at all.”

“In that case I will have to up my game I guess.”

“I guess you do or otherwise- Oh my god!”

Felicity released a choking sound, her fingernails digging even more deeply into his skin, when Oliver bit down on her clit ever so gently. It wasn’t really a bite, but his teeth grazed the sensitive nub and applied just the right pressure to increase Felicity’s pleasure even more. Her skin was hot, Oliver’s touches making her feel like little stitches of pain and pleasure at the same time.

“Do it, Felicity,” Oliver whispered against her core. “Moan for me.”

When Oliver closed his lips against her clip this time, putting his tongue flat against her sensitive skin, Felicity pressed her lips together more firmly. She could feel the heat radiating off her skin, building a sharp contrast to the sweat that covered her body. She could feel a single drop of cool sweat running down her neck and down her chest between her breasts.

Eventually, Oliver pressed down on her hips even more and caught her clit between his lips. Felicity felt her legs starting to tense. She felt like she was right on the edge. Yet, each movement of Oliver’s lips seemed to take her higher and higher on her pleasure. When he opened his lips and rubbed the tip of his tongue against her clit, Felicity couldn’t hold on any longer. She released a long moan, Oliver’s name falling from her lips.

Immediately, Oliver took his arm off her hips, letting her move the way she wanted to. His tongue rubbed against her clit furiously, touching just the right places in just the right ways. Felicity’s toes flexed, her back arched off the mattress and her fingernails dug so deeply into Oliver’s arm that she could almost feel him hiss against her center in response. With a gasp for breath, the pleasure spread through her body, her muscles jerking involuntarily.

Oliver let her ride out the waves of her orgasm against his mouth. Only when her muscles started to relax, her body sinking into the mattress, he put her feet back to her carpet and slowly kissed a path up her body. His lips opened her against her skin, his tongue tasting the thin layer of sweat. When he reached the corner of her lips, he pulled back enough to look at her. Felicity took some deep breaths, looking back at Oliver’s face. His eyes were dark and full of desire for her, his lips slightly opened as he had to catch his breath, too.

Felicity felt herself filling with more and more love for him. It should be impossible to love and want a person as much as she loved and wanted, even needed, Oliver. Yet, she could feel in every cell of her body that it was true, and it would never fail to amaze her.

A smile spread on both of their lips. Felicity slid her hand into Oliver’s short hair and pulled him down towards her. Their lips met in a hungry, yet gentle kiss. Their tongues danced with each other’s slowly. When Oliver rested his bodyweight on top of her, Felicity put a leg around her hips and squeezed until Oliver rolled onto his back, taking her with him.

Eventually, Felicity put her arms around Oliver’s neck and sat up on top of him, taking her with him. She was sitting in his lap, and she could feel his hard cock pressing against her sensitive center through his sweatpants. She nuzzled his nose and brushed her lips against him once more before she pulled back enough to look at him.

“Pleased with what you got?”

Felicity grinned. “Are you going to ask for feedback every time we have sex now?”

Oliver chuckled. “Given what you said before, I should ask for recommendation letters.”

“And who would you show them to?” Felicity asked, cocking her head.

“I would just read them myself to boost my self-esteem of course,” Oliver replied and peppered a series of kisses against her collarbone before he added, “and maybe I would show them to you to remind you whenever you feel like complaining.”

“And there I was, at least for a second, thinking you would want me to write letters to recommend your sexual skills to other women,” Felicity said playfully.

Oliver smiled at her, his eyes full of adoration. Slowly he slid his fingers under the dress shirt she still wore and lowered the fabric down her shoulders until it fell to the floor. His fingertips stroked over her back ever so gently, and Felicity pressed herself closer to Oliver in response.

“When would I have time or energy for any other women?” Oliver asked as he wrapped his arm around her waist more tightly and crawled to the middle of the bed. “You making as many demands as I can fulfill.”

“And here I thought Little Oliver was in top form after eight long weeks.” Felicity sighed. “Maybe I have to take care of myself instead and-“

“Don’t you dare,” Oliver interrupted her, holding onto her wrist when she was about to lower her hand between their bodies. “I am going to take good care of you again.”

Felicity smiled before their lips met in another gentle kiss. While their tongues made contact, they started moving slowly. Oliver put his hands to Felicity’s hips and helped guiding her movement. That way their hips met in a slow rhythm, Oliver’s hard cock pressing against her center whenever she thrust down on him. Distracting herself from the way her pleasure built back up ever so quickly, Felicity stroked her fingertips down his chest. She reexplored his scars, caressing them with the gentle touch of her fingers.

Soon the need for more grew too much for her to take, though. She lowered her hands between them until she could reach the bowtie at the waistband of Oliver’s sweatpants. She opened it with quick movements and reached inside, grabbing his hard shaft and pumping gently.

“God, Felicity,” Oliver choked out, his head falling back into his neck.

Felicity smiled, using the opportunity to pepper a dozen of kisses down her throat. She continued her stroking and pumping movements, teasing the tip of his cock by swirling her thumb around it. Oliver thrust up into her hand, chasing her touch. His fingers dug into her hips, holding her against him tightly.

When Felicity’s lips reached his collarbone and she was about to gently push his body into a lying position, Oliver framed her face with his hands and lifted her face back onto his level. He brushed his lips against hers and whispered, “Not tonight.”

“Okay,” Felicity whispered back.

Their lips met in another kiss while Oliver was wiggling out of his sweatpants and threw them away. Felicity hovered over his lap. When she grabbed hold of his cock and positioned him at her entrance, their lips parted. They locked eyes with the other, both holding their breath as Felicity lowered herself onto him and he eased inside.

There was a long pause. Neither of them moved. Neither of them said a word. They just looked at each other quietly. Oliver stroked the knuckles of his hands against her cheek gently while Felicity was massaging his shoulders. It was an intimate moment that neither of them wanted to miss.

When Oliver’s erection jerked inside of her, his hips unable to hold still any longer, Felicity started moving. She rocked against him slowly, stroking one hand through his hair and the other down his back. Their eyes stayed locked onto each other’s. Felicity knew this was Oliver’s favorite position. He loved holding her to him tightly and watching her as she moved on top of him.

Eventually, their lips met in another kiss, and their movements quickened in response. Oliver answered Felicity’s down-thrusts by thrusting up. His pelvis rubbed against her clit just the right way.

Sexual intimacy had always been a pivotal part of their relationship. Despite being partners and friends for a little more than two years before getting into a relationship, sex had soon taken on an important role for them. At first, it had been Oliver’s language to tell her how he felt about her. It had been his way to tell her how he had been feeling about himself. It had been his way of letting her know that he was having trouble and he needed her. When they had just gotten together, he had still been very closed off because of everything he had been through during his five years away and the time that had followed. Over the years, he had become increasingly good at using words to tell her how he felt. Yet, the sex hadn’t lost its role in their relationship. It was still a way for them to communicate and to let each other know how they felt.

When Oliver thrust up particularly hard, pulling her hips down onto his, Felicity released a strangled sound. Oliver swallowed it eagerly, continuing steal kisses from her lips. Felicity held onto his hair and shoulder tightly, using the hold she had on him for leverage as she continued thrusting up and down.

It wasn’t long until Felicity felt her body tensing. Her inner walls were fluttering around his length. Her movements became quicker, and she thrust down harder.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered between two kisses, letting him know that she was close.

Immediately, Oliver slid his arms around her back angled her back a little. He reached deeper in that position, his cock rubbing against her g-spot and his pelvis rubbing against her clit. Felicity leaned her head back and when Oliver started sucking at the side of her neck, she felt the waves of heat taking over her body. Her muscles spasmed, tremors running through her body and she released a strangled moan.

Though her legs were already getting tired, her body feeling exhausted after two mind-blowing orgasms, she kept moving on top of him. The waves of her orgasm were slowly fading away, while Oliver’s thrusts grew quicker and harder as he was chasing his relief with more and more desperation. Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling Oliver’s head to her chest. The moment his ear rested on top of her breasts, his body tensed. His cock jerked inside of her, filling her with his seed as he finally came.

“Felicity,” he whispered against her skin, pressing his nose to her skin and breathing her in.

He thrust some more times, lazily moving inside of her for some stolen moments. When his body started relaxing, he angled his head back and Felicity lost no time capturing his lips with hers. With a sigh, Oliver opened up to her and rolled them around until they were lying on the mattress, Felicity’s body caught between Oliver’s body and the soft mattress.

When their lips parted, their eyes locking onto each other’s, Felicity stroked her hands up and down his neck. Her fingernails scratched his skin gently the way she knew he loved. Back rubs and back scratches after sex were Oliver’s favorite way to recover after all.

Felicity smiled, asking, “Do you still want feedback?”

Oliver chuckled. “Any complains, my dear?”

“Hm…”

At the deliberative sound, Oliver stroked his fingers down her ribs. “Do I need to convince you once more?”

Felicity chuckled, catching his hand and kissing his knuckles. “Not tonight.”

“Alright,” Oliver replied. He brushed his lips against hers in a gentle kiss and kissed the tip of her nose before he whispered, “I’ll be right back.”

They both groaned slightly when Oliver slid out of her. While Oliver disappeared into the bathroom, Felicity rolled onto her side of the bed and reached for one of the shirts that was lying there. She really had to clean up the bedroom again. With Addie and Millie, it had been really difficult to find time for anything more than the necessities lately.

“Did I tire you out?” Oliver asked when he stepped back into the bedroom just when Felicity was yawning full heartedly.

“You, the kids, everything,” Felicity replied with a smile. “I am going to sleep like a baby tonight, a baby that sleeps all through the night.”

“That’s definitely not our babies.”

Felicity chuckled. “Indeed.”

Oliver threw a wet washcloth over to her. While Felicity was cleaning herself, Oliver crawled back into bed. Felicity threw the washcloth back into the bathroom and pulled the blanket over them. She rolled onto her back and spread her arms for Oliver, and with a smile he lay down on top of her, resting his head on her chest. His arms snuck under her body to pull her closer.

“Goodnight,” she whispered, stroking her hand through Oliver’s hair gently.

“Goodnight,” Oliver replied and kissed the top of her breasts. “And Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

Felicity smiled, kissing the top of Oliver’s head before she replied with a tired smile, “I love you, too.”


	243. Meaningful names

A thrill of anticipation took hold of her when Felicity unlocked the front door and stepped into her house. With bated breath, she waited for the sounds of pattering children’s feet and squeals of happiness to welcome her home after her first day at home. She responded to the nonappearance of the desired reaction with a slightly disappointed sigh. After months of being with the kids almost every hour of every day, she had hoped they had missed her a little more, at least enough to properly welcome her at the door now that she was home again.

Felicity slipped out of her shoes and closed her eyes for a moment at the wonderful feeling of her aching soles touching the cold hardwood floor. It had been a long day. She had paid a visit to all departments and spent most of her time in the Department for Applied Science, checking on current developments. The day had felt like a marathon. She had probably walked every edge of the building at least three times. Once she had ranted and raved with her family for not welcoming her home properly, Felicity would fall onto the couch and probably sleep until she had to go to work tomorrow. Maybe Oliver would pity her enough to carry her upstairs, peel her out of her dress and allow her to spare her back from a night on the couch. It wasn’t the best place to spend a comfortable night after all.

She dropped her keys into the small bowl on the table next to the door, put her purse on top of it and turned around. While she was strolling towards the living room, she wondered what Oliver and the kids were doing. It was so quiet in the house that it was almost like-

Whatever scolding words she had had on her tongue about not being properly welcomed back home suddenly disappeared at the sight in front of her. There was a mess of pillows, blankets and toys all over the floor. It wasn’t the fact that it looked like a bombshell had come that made Felicity forget about her disappointment, though. It was much more that in the middle of all the mess, her family must have passed out from exhaustion. Emmy was lying in one of the armchairs, her feet dangling over the armrest. A still open book was lying on her stomach. Oliver lay sprawled out on the couch, Tommy snuggled to a fluffy pillow between his feet. Millie and Addie were resting on Oliver’s chest. His strong arms were wrapped around their two youngest daughters tightly, holding them safely to his chest.

Felicity couldn’t contain a wide smile. The sight of her family being gathered together like this just warmed her heart. She’d never get tired of seeing Oliver and the kids like this even if she was little disappointed that she hadn’t been part of whatever they had done today.

After taking a few photos to possibly use against Oliver later, Felicity tiptoed closer. They all looked so peaceful, especially Oliver. She felt tempted to reach out her hand and stroke her fingers through his hair. She imagined that his day had been as long as hers, though. He could need the rest, just like their children.

Felicity didn’t know how long she had watched her loved ones when Millie finally moved. She stretched out her short legs, releasing a low grumble. Putting her forearms to Oliver’s chest, she propped herself up and smiled happily when she saw Felicity. Still, she looked unbelievably tired.

“Mama.”

Oliver sighed sleepily, putting a hand to the back of her head. “Mommy’s coming home soon.”

Felicity smiled. It didn’t happen often that Oliver was so fast asleep that he wasn’t aware of his surroundings. Sometimes, Felicity would wake up in the middle of the night, no idea what had pulled her from her sleep. Oliver would snuggle closer to her and tell her what it had been even though he hadn’t really woken up at all. Felicity had once asked him about it, and Oliver had told her that the severity of his survival instinct was hard to switch off. It had been more than ten years since he had come back from the hell of his five years away, but it still wasn’t easy.

While Millie rested her head back down against Oliver’s chest and put an arm around her baby sister’s body Felicity kissed Oliver’s temple. She stroked her fingers through his short hair, massaging his scalp, and Oliver hummed in response.

“Mommy’s back home,” he whispered so quietly that Felicity was sure only she could hear it.

Smiling, Felicity pulled back a little. She kept her face right over his and nuzzled his nose gently. Her fingers continued massaging his scalp and temple. When she looked at him, she saw him smiling back at her.

“How was your day?” she asked.

“Terrible,” Oliver replied, an amused grin spreading on his face. “All four kids were needed to keep me from coming to Queen Incorporated, throw you over my shoulder and take you back home with us. I was going insane. You can never leave us again.”

Felicity chuckled quietly and brushed her lips against Oliver’s. “Good thing, I am not planning on leaving for longer than necessary anyway.”

Oliver smiled. “Good.”

Felicity leaned her forehead against Oliver’s for a moment before she looked around the living room. When she met Oliver’s eyes again, he grinned innocently.

“What exactly happened here?” she asked.

“Well, after we tried our best to distract ourselves from how much we were missing you-“

“-and had to disturb the entire living room for that I guess-“

“-we decided to rest a little. Addie was whiny, so Tommy suggested that Emmy read us a story from her picture book. We all snuggled up here, and I guess we fell asleep one by one,” Oliver told her. “I’d offer you a place, but it’s a little tight here as it is.”

Felicity chuckled. She kissed Oliver’s forehead and walked around the couch to lie down on the broad backrest. She stroked her hand over Millie’s arm on Addie’s back before she rested it against her elbow. Oliver’s fingers found hers and laced through hers. When she met his eyes once more, he was smiling at her.

They shared a long, quiet moment. In the craziness of their lives, domestic daytime with five kids as well as the adrenaline kick of nightly vigilantism, there wasn’t much time for quiet. That was why they cherished moments like these even more.

“How was your day?” Oliver asked eventually.

“Exhausting,” Felicity replied with a sigh though she was smiling, “but also really great. I missed work even though I missed you guys too.”

“Well, we are not going anywhere,” Oliver told her. “We will always wait here for you to come home and cuddle with us.”

Felicity squeezed his fingers and smiled at him with even more love. She couldn’t even remember how life had been before she had been with Oliver. Her life didn’t exactly revolve around him since she also had her friends, her jobs and her kids of course, but Oliver was an important part of her life. Her life didn’t revolve around him, but he contributed to keep it spinning.

“Why are you smiling at me like that?” Oliver asked.

“Because I love you,” Felicity replied without hesitation, “and because I am trying to hypnotize you because I have to ask you a question.”

“You do not get to eat an entire brick of ice cream for dinner.” Oliver shook his head. “You had an exhausting day at work and probably didn’t eat much all day. That means you will have to eat all the vitamins for dinner. You need to be strong because you are still breastfeeding Addie, and need to stay fit.”

Felicity rolled her eyes mockingly. “Yes, Dad.”

It was heartwarming what loving care Oliver took of his loved ones. He had grown to love cooking, and he was always making sure Felicity and the kids got all the vitamins and nutrients they needed. Apart from the fact that he had completely messed with her unhealthy eating habits, it was really sweet.

“Anyway,” Felicity said after a while. “It’s not about that.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Shoot.”

“So, I decided to maybe build a Science Center for kids and-“

“You did?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, I think it’s important young kids get to explore science in a playful manner. You know, why make children believe that science is just for adults? Apart from the fact that it’s just not true, it doesn’t convey the image from science young kids need to be interested in science. I always loved science, and I just wished there would have been more offers to explore that interest a little. My dad did his best to encourage me as long as he was there, but when he left, my mom couldn’t keep doing it. The strong dependence of home and family on the encouragements of kids is quite unfair to children who don’t grow up in families that can offer something like this. That’s why I think there need to be more programs and offers that relieves the pressure on parents who just can’t offer their kids something like that. QI has the money and the reputation to help with something like this.”

“Don’t you think it’s a little much?” Oliver asked with a slight frown. “Don’t get me wrong. I love this idea. I am a hundred percent sure that you can do this, but you just decided to start this new project in the foundation and I know you are also talking to Bruce about another project with Wayne Enterprises already. It’s a lot. I don’t want you to stress yourself out with starting three big new things at the same time.”

“I got it handled,” Felicity promised. “I have thought this through thoroughly and I have a really good plan to make sure the intense stages of the projects don’t happen at the same time. It’s all-“

Oliver squeezed her fingers. “It’s fine. You have thought this through. You’ve got a plan. I just wanted to make sure. Your reassurance is all I need.”

Felicity smiled. “Thanks for trusting me.”

“Always,” Oliver simply replied, making Felicity smile even wider. He stroked his thumb over the back of her hand. “So, what did you want to ask me about?”

“Well,” Felicity started, stroking her free hand through her ponytail almost a little nervously. “I was looking for a good place for the Science Center and let Emily put together a list of all the buildings and former building of QI and QC. I want a building with a history, you know?”

Oliver nodded. “Sounds great, but if you need help with that, I think I need to disappoint you. I didn’t really care about the company until-“

“No, I know,” Felicity replied quickly. “I just thought you might know a little bit more about Oliver Enterprises?”

She had been more than surprised to find the name of that former holding and the address of the corresponding building that was currently unused on the list of former property of the company. She had never taken a thorough look at all the buildings and holdings Queen Incorporated or Queen Consolidated had held before she had started working there, but she had thought that a holding that held her husband’s name should have raised her attention.

“It used to be a holding company,” Oliver replied, shrugging his shoulders. “My dad took me there sometimes when I was younger. We spent entire days there. When I was five it felt like a great adventure there for me.”

“He lay the foundation of it the day you were born,” Felicity added, “but it had to be sold fifteen years later when Queen Consolidated was struggling.”

“Possible.”

“I know because I did some research.”

Oliver nodded. When Felicity kept looking at him, he stated, “He named it after me.”

“Why did you never tell me about it?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I think I just forgot about it.”

Felicity nodded slowly. She doubted that she would ever forget if there was a building that carried her name in five feet tall letters. Then again, she guessed Oliver had been growing up with buildings and organizations and whatever else carrying the name Queen that a small thing like a holding company could be forgotten. Quite a weird thought, but okay.

“What if I rebuy that building and make it the Oliver Queen Science Center for children?”

Oliver frowned. “Shouldn’t it be the _Felicity_ Queen Science Center for children? It’s your work, your idea and your building after all. I think it’s part of the legacy you leave for this city, part of the legacy you can actually talk about. It should carry your name.”

“Yeah, but I don’t really want a building with my name on it. It’s weird.”

Oliver chuckled quietly. “Oh, so I have to borrow you my name for it?”

Felicity nodded. “I think that sounds perfect.”

“You know, Queen Incorporated carries your name, too,” Oliver told her after a moment, squeezing her hand, “so it shouldn’t be a big deal to make it the Felicity Queen Science Center for children.”

“But it’s your family name, so-“

“It’s our family name,” Oliver corrected her.

“I know,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes slightly. “It’s just that… I don’t know… I think I would like it to be your name on the building. We have the Robert Queen Applied Science Center, so why not add the Oliver Queen Science Center for children? By the way, I am not convinced about this addition with the ‘for children’. It makes it unhandy.”

“You still have time to think about the name,” Oliver suggested, “but just so you know, the Applied Science Center was named after my dad because he died. If you name the Science Center for kids after me, that’s like an agreement that I get to die first. I don’t mind. It actually plays into my wishes since I definitely want to die before you, but I think you should know.”

Felicity puckered her lips, slowly nodding to herself. “Yeah… You know, you’re right. The name is really not the right pick yet. I’ll go upstairs and change into more comfortable clothes. You should wake the kids because they won’t sleep tonight at all if you let them sleep now.”

Felicity would have to find a way to convince Oliver of the name. She’d like to name that project after him because she felt it had been a sweet thing from Robert to decide to name a holding after his son that had just been born. Oliver Enterprises had a history, and she would like to use that to build up the Science Center for kids. What better way to start a company than building it on a father’s love for his child?

Just when Felicity had reached the first step, she heard Oliver whispering to the kids loudly, “Hey. Hey, kids. Mommy is back home. She’s just going upstairs. Let’s chase her and attack-cuddle her in bed, so she can’t go to work ever again.”


	244. Worlds colliding

“I still don’t think taking the kids with us was a good idea.” Oliver shot a short look into the rearview mirror, probably to check on the sleeping kids instead of the traffic behind them. “We don’t know what to expect here. I mean apart from S.T.A.R. Labs not exactly being adjusted for kids-“

“-which our lair wasn’t either when we brought the kids there the first time-“

“-I just don’t think letting an alien anywhere near them is a good idea,” Oliver continued without replying to her objection. His hands tightened around the steering wheel of the SUV they had rented for as long as they were in Central City. “What if she hurts them?”

Felicity took his right hand from the steering wheel and kissed his knuckles. She continued holding his hand in hers, stroking her thumb over the knuckles, as she replied, “I don’t think she is dangerous, you know? She’s friends with Barry after all. Besides, she got us that really cute cape for Addie to give her more strength, remember? That sounds like she a really nice person even if she is not exactly human.”

Oliver’s jaw clenched. “But do we have to take the kids near her? We don’t know her yet, at least not personally. I don’t like getting the kids there before I was able to see for myself how she is.”

“You know that it’s too late for us to change our minds now, right?” Felicity asked, shooting a short look back over her shoulder. She watched Oliver’s jaw tensing even more as she pressed the back of his hand to her heart and used her free hand to stroke it through his short hair. “Everything is going to be okay, hon.”

Oliver leaned his head back into Felicity’s touch, keeping his eyes straight forward. She knew it wasn’t easy for him. He had always had trouble allowing any dangers into their children’s life. It was the same with the little dangers like falling and getting hurt that every parent had to see their kids suffering through eventually as it was with the bigtime dangers that came with two parents in the vigilante-business. Time and time again, Oliver had seriously considered giving up on being the Arrow to protect the kids. He knew Felicity wouldn’t give up her part on the team, though, so he wouldn’t give up his either. He had learned to live with the dangers that nighttime job brought and did his best to keep it away from their family life. An alien was a completely new and quite different thing, though. It was a possible danger Oliver wasn’t sure he could control or handle at all.

Felicity shot a short look at the kids. They all slept peacefully, but Felicity wasn’t surprised about that. It had already been past their bedtime when Barry had called them and asked them to come over because of some emergency he hadn’t been able to say much about on the phone. He had asked for the whole team to come to Central City to help them, so they had called Laurel, Thea and Roy, too. John and Lyla had taken their kids on vacation and weren’t available, and Curtis was out with his husband for their wedding anniversary. Anyway, Felicity and Oliver had decided that leaving all four kids with Donna and Quentin hadn’t been a good idea, so they had taken them with them. The kids’ excitement for the surprising trip had kept them, or at least Emmy and Tommy, from sleeping until they had sat them in the rented SUV.

When Oliver pulled into a parking space in front of S.T.A.R. Labs, Felicity released a sigh. She doubted that Emmy and Tommy would be asleep much longer. Addie and Millie were less of a problem with that as they could basically sleep everywhere. As soon as Felicity and Oliver would take Emmy and Tommy out of their seats, they would wake up, though. They were just too old to be sleeping even when things were happening around them.

Oliver kept his hands on the steering wheel, still looking right ahead of himself with tense jaw. Felicity squeezed his hand and, with a sigh, Oliver turned his head to look at her. His eyes showed tiredness and worry.

“Everything is going to be okay,” Felicity repeated. “She’s friends with Barry. That has to mean she is good person.”

Oliver sighed. “I hope so.”

“I am sure of it,” Felicity replied.

She leaned forward and captured Oliver’s lips in a gentle kiss, giving him the reassurance she knew he needed. Oliver’s hand held hers even more tightly. When their lips parted and their eyes met, he nodded, though.

“Let’s go,” he said, his voice a little harder like it always was when he was in Arrow-mode.

Just when they got out of the car, Roy pulled into the parking lot next to them. At the same time, the doors of S.T.A.R. Labs opened and Caitlin stepped outside with a wide smile on her lips.

“You are here!” she said happily, quickly coming over to pull Felicity into a tight hug. “Please tell me you brought my little goddaughter with you. I haven’t seen her in like forever.”

Felicity chuckled, nodding to the backseats of the SUV. “We brought all the kids.”

While Caitlin was welcoming the rest of the team, Felicity gently woke up Emmy and Tommy. The kids weren’t especially delighted to be woken up after just a few hours of sleep. As soon as they realized where they were, most of the tiredness was forgotten, at least for the moment. They had been so excited when they had told them they were going to Central City. They loved being here and being spoiled by the part of their expanded family they didn’t get to see that often. Felicity knew she had to find a good place to sleep for them in the Labs or otherwise their excitement would sooner or later turn into a disaster. Even if the Labs weren’t built for kids, there had to be some place for them to catch some rest once the first excitement was over.

“I will go ahead to check out how safe it is for the kids to be there,” Oliver told Felicity with a quick peck to her lips. “Leave all the bags here. I will go get them if we need them.”

That being said, Oliver turned around and headed into the building. Felicity sighed, shaking her head slightly. Some things would probably never change.

“Okay, who wants to join in on a little race?” Roy asked Emmy and Tommy, rubbing his hands together in excitement. “Who finds Uncle Barry first is going to win?”

When the kids agreed, Laurel performed the referee. On _go_ all three of them started running, or, well, Tommy and Emmy did, but at least Roy did his best to pretend to be running. He’d never let the kids lose. Laurel and Caitlin followed the three racers, both of them holding their sleeping goddaughters in their arms. Felicity and Thea followed with a little distance.

“Do you think it was a good idea accompanying us here?” Felicity asked, linking her arm with Thea’s.

“Well, it’s aliens,” Thea replied matter-of-factly though Felicity didn’t miss her excitement. When she cocked her head, Thea sighed. “It’s not like I will go into the field.”

“Which means we will have to find an excuse why you decided to come with us but don’t want to go into the field,” Felicity replied with a nod. Finding excuses for why Thea hadn’t been available for Arrow work lately had getting harder with time. The others were probably growing suspicious already. Felicity hesitated a moment before she asked, “Did you decide when you want to tell the others? You are almost fifteen weeks along. Sooner than you’ll know, you will wake up and realize your baby doesn’t want to hide any longer.”

Thea smiled, resting her head on Felicity’s shoulder. “I know. It’s just fun keeping it just between Roy and me, you know? It’s like a wonderful, little secret.”

“It doesn’t get less wonderful when you tell people,” Felicity assured and squeezed Thea’s hand. “Everyone will be really happy for you and spoil you as much as possible. Ask for anything, and someone will get it for you. It’s one of the few advantages of being pregnant and it’s really something to enjoy before your little nugget here will keep you on your toes. Then you will be the one making sure someone gets everything they need.”

Thea nodded, lowering her gaze. Frowning, Felicity stood still in the middle of the hallway and turned her sister around to her. She looked at her with a questioning gaze, wordlessly asking if she was okay.

“It’s just…” Thea released a trembling breath. “I wish my mom was here, you know?”

Felicity smiled sympathetically, pulling Thea into a hug and stroking her hand over her short hair. She knew exactly what Thea meant. Though Felicity hadn’t had the best relationship with her mother when she had been younger, she had felt the need to talk to her a lot when she had been pregnant with Emmy. She would have woken up in the middle of the night and called her, asking her things about pregnancy and babies. It was probably an instinct of women to turn to their mothers when they were about to become mothers.

“Your mom would be very proud of you,” Felicity whispered, “and I hope you know you can always come to me if there is something you want to talk about.”

“I know,” Thea said, pulling out of the hug with a sniffle. She wiped her fingers under her eyes and gave Felicity a smile. “I know.”

“And in case you ever need a motherly or a fatherly advice or grandparents for you baby, go to Donna and Quentin,” Felicity suggested. “I know it’s not the same, but they will do their best to give you whatever you and your baby need. Ask Oliver. I am sure he’d agree.”

Thea nodded slowly. “Thank you, Felicity.”

“Always,” Felicity replied. She linked her arm with Thea’s once more as they continued their way to Barry’s base of operation. “How high are the stakes that Oliver is currently looking at Barry’s friend with a death glare?”

“Too high to bet against you,” Thea replied with a chuckle.

Of course, they were right. As soon as they stepped into their hideout, Felicity caught sight of her husband. Oliver was standing almost in the middle of the room, his arms crossed in front of his chest and his eyes focused on Barry’s friend who, to Felicity’s utter surprise, was hovering several feet over the floor and lasering a picture into the concrete wall across from her with her eyes. His face was hard and deliberative.

Emmy and Tommy were standing under her feet, watching with excited eyes as she lasered an arrow. When the picture was done, she lowered to the floor, coming to stand in front of the kids with her hands put to her hips and a wide smile on her lips.

“That’s so cool!” Emmy screeched, flinging her arms around the woman’s legs. “Can you teach that to me?”

While the blonde woman was laughing at that, Felicity saw Oliver’s shoulders tensing. She squeezed Thea’s hand, releasing her to greet their other friends from Central City, who were standing together with Laurel and Roy. With a gentle smile on her lips, Felicity approached Oliver. She put her arms around his bicep and rested her chin on his shoulder.

“So?” she asked. “What do you think about her?”

“Not sure yet,” Oliver replied. “If those lasering eyes get out of control-“

“Did Barry’s speeding ever got out of control so much that they hurt the children?” Felicity asked. “Did Laurel’s Canary Cry ever get out of control? Did Thea, Roy or you ever accidentally shoot an arrow at the kids?”

“It’s not the same,” Oliver replied. “She’s an alien after all.”

When the blonde alien, whose name Felicity just couldn’t remember, turned towards them and approached them, Felicity stroked Oliver’s bicep and whispered, “Be nice, okay?”

“I’m always nice.”

Felicity snorted. “Sure. You of all people.”

“Hey, what’s that-“

Before Oliver got to complain, the blonde alien had reached them. With a wide smile on her lips, she reached out her hand. “Hi, you have to be Oliver and Felicity or Arrow and Overwatch. It’s so nice to meet you. You have the sweetest kids.”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied, shaking her hand. “It’s so nice to meet you, too. Barry has told us a lot about you,...”

“Kara,” she helped out.

“Kara,” Felicity repeated. “That it was.”

Kara turned to Oliver, smiling at him, while he continued looking at her with hard eyes.

“He is happy to meet you too,” Felicity explained, pinching Oliver in the side. “He has just trouble showing it.”

Oliver cleared his throat and eventually loosened his arms out of the tight hold in front of his chest. He shook Kara’s hand. Yet, his jaw was still tense.

“I love your children. They are great,” Kara said, not the slightest intimidated by Oliver’s death glare. “Hey, I could get them Supergirl-shirts. Kids on my earth love those, and I am sure Emmy and Tommy-“

“They are much more fans of the Starling City vigilantes, but thanks,” Oliver interrupted her.

Emmy must have heard it since she came running towards them. “Daddy, please! A Supergirl-shirt would be so cool. And I want to go as Supergirl for Halloween.”

“But you wanted to go as Arrow,” Oliver replied. “Remember? We already picked out a design for the suit, so-“

“But now I want to be Supergirl,” Emmy replied. “She’s cooler, daddy. She can fly and her eyes are lasers.”

Oliver rolled his eyes, ignoring Emmy and turning to their friends. “So, there is metahuman to take care of?”

While Emmy just shrugged her shoulders and went back to Tommy, who was still taking in the giant arrow on the wall, Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. Kara turned towards her. “He hates me, right?”

Felicity shot her a sympathetic look, explaining, “He’s a little sensitive when it comes to the kids, but don’t you worry. He will learn to like you. He didn’t exactly like Barry at first, either. When he warms up to people, he’s really great.”

Kara and Felicity joined the rest of their friends as they discussed the metahuman that had escaped from Kara’ earth and was currently terrorizing the citizens of Central City. Apparently, the villain was quite the thing Felicity realized while Caitlin summed up the most important facts about her. The woman, who Cisco had chosen to call Bloody Mary, was like a femme fatal, unbelievably beautiful and highly dangerous. In the last couple of days, she had attacked five men by biting their necks and sucking some of their blood. All five men had run amok after that. When caught by the police, they had been confused and apparently hadn’t remembered anything. Barry had already tried to go against her, but her telekinetic skills had made it difficult. She wasn’t easy to catch, so Oliver needed the help of their friends.

“Is she a vampire?” Emmy asked, stepping next to Kara.

“No,” Oliver replied.

Felicity bit down on her tongue at the sight of Oliver’s facial expression. The thought that their world of metahumans and now aliens was also occupied by vampires was probably a little more than he could take. Oliver had seen a lot in this world, but that would never mean he’d get used to it. Felicity bit her tongue, imagining how John would react to any of this.

“Hey, Sweetie, can you go back to Tommy and play with him please?” Felicity asked Emmy, stroking a hand over her curly hair.”

“Okay,” Emmy replied, turned around and ran back to her little brother.

“So, what’s the plan?” Laurel asked once Emmy was out of reach.

Barry looked at Oliver, almost like he wanted him to answer. Oliver lifted his hands in a defensive manner, though. “You brought us in. You should be the leader.”

Well, some things had changed, Felicity thought to herself. Without any doubt, a few years ago Oliver would have taken over whether or not Barry would ask him to do so. Being in control would have been his priority.

“Well, I guess we should… uhm…”

“Find out more about Bloody Mary,” Oliver whispered.

“Find out more about Bloody Mary,” Barry repeated out loud, nodding his head in agreement.

“And do a test run against Supergirl,” Oliver added in another whisper.

“And do a test run against Supergirl,” Barry repeated loudly once more.

“Are we really supposed to pretend we don’t hear you?” Roy asked Oliver, perking up an eyebrow.

Barry quickly cleared his throat and explained, “Okay, then I guess the geeks and the kids spread themselves out in the work area, and everyone else goes down to the basement where we have our new training area for when we have visitors that actually need training.”

Barry looked at Oliver again, who gave him a short nod. “Just one thing.”

“What?” Barry asked.

“Don’t call my wife a geek.”

Kara leaned over to Felicity. “Are you sure Oliver likes Barry?”

Felicity smiled. She was about to head to the computer area to get her fingers on the computer and try find out more about Bloody Mary when Thea cleared her throat. Felicity turned around, seeing the slight hesitant expression on her face. Thea shot a look at Roy, who held her hand in both of hers and gave her a nod.

“Well, I guess I am going to be the one being responsible for the kids then since I am not a geek at all,” Thea explained and took in a deep breath, “and I can’t go into the field or even join in on the test run because I am pregnant.”

Felicity watched Oliver’s reaction closely. He was definitely surprised though Felicity had thought that maybe he had suspected it. Thea had made excuses for not being available for Arrow business for weeks now. Probably the thought of his baby sister being grown up enough to have a baby on her own just scared him a little.

When everyone had congratulated Thea and Roy, Oliver was still standing there, staring at his sister. Thea bit down on her bottom lip and stepped closer to Oliver. Eventually, he sighed and spread his arms for his sister, pulling her into a tight hug.

“I am so happy for you,” he whispered to her. “This kid is going to be blessed because it has one of the two greatest mothers it can have.”

“That’s putting quite the pressure on me, comparing me to Felicity,” Thea replied. “She has five kids and got it handled perfectly.”

“You will be great,” Oliver assured her once more and kissed her cheek. “And we are always here for you if there is anything you need. Advise, help, a shoulder to cry on, anything.”

“Thank you,” Thea whispered.

She tightened her arms around her brother for a brief moment before she let go of him. With a last smile, she went away. On her way to Laurel, who was waiting with Millie in her arms, Thea squeezed Felicity’s hand. Then she took her niece from their friend and carried the sleeping toddler over to where Caitlin, Cisco and the rest of the kids were already waiting.

Felicity looked after her for a moment, happy for her sister’s happiness because she deserved it after everything she had been through, before she turned to Oliver. He had turned towards her already and watched her now with his arms crossed in front of his chest. Felicity perked up her eyebrows.

“How long did you know?” Oliver asked.

“Hm?” Felicity asked back innocently. When Oliver only cocked his head, Felicity smiled. She crossed the distance to him and put her hands to his forearms. “Not that long. Only since Connor has been born.”

“That’s been almost eleven weeks now.”

“When you say it like that it sounds so long,” Felicity replied.

She puckered her lips and pushed her chin towards her chest a little, giving him a sweet look. She knew Oliver couldn’t resist her when he looked at her like that. Indeed, Oliver rolled his eyes, released a long sigh and leaned forward to capture her lips in a chaste kiss. Without saying anything more, he followed their friends to the training area.

Felicity headed to the rest of the geek squad as Barry had called them and rubbed her hands excitedly. It had been quite some time until there had been anything happening in Starling that would have challenged her abilities. She knew she should feel happy about that since she and her kids as well as the rest of her family were living in that city. Yet, the geek in her had missed a good challenge.

“Let’s get this started.”

 

 

Two days later, Bloody Mary was safe behind the walls of the prison in the basement of S.T.A.R. Labs, and thanks to some biotech gadget Felicity and Caitlin had developed and Cisco had put into action, she was robbed of her abilities, at least for the time being. It had been a long way to capture her, and it had been more exhausting than Oliver would have thought. Yet, with united forced, they had made it and that was why they were celebrating now.

Oliver watched with a glass of champagne in his hand how Kara played with Emmy, Tommy and Millie. She seemed to really enjoy spending time with the kids and the kids seemed to enjoy spending time with her. He had been suspicious about her at first. He didn’t have much experience with aliens, so it wasn’t exactly easy to estimate whether they were something to keep the kids safe from or something that could enrich his kids’ life. Given how easily Kara had found a way into the children’s heart there seemed to be no danger coming from her.

Oliver was still a little pissed, just a tiny bit of course, that Emmy was suddenly preferring any other hero over the Arrow. He had always been her favorite hero. Now she was all over Supergirl. He knew with a few days of spoiling her and reminding her of the cool trick arrows he had, she’d get back in her good graces. Yet, beating a flying alien with lasering eyes was a lot to compete against. It wouldn’t be easy.

Anyway, he also hadn’t been particularly looking forward to working with an alien. When he was out in the field, he needed people he could completely rely on. The people on his team were definitely all people he could rely on. It had taken some time until he had trusted them so much, but he did trust them now. They were his family, and he knew he could put his lives in their hands blindly. Trusting an alien had seemed a little much to ask for, but Kara had proved him wrong. She had proved to work well with others and she might have even saved him from getting hit by a bus that Bloody Mary had moved in his direction. They had needed her out there, and she had delivered.

Oliver doubted he’d ever be fond of aliens, but he would give them the benefit of the doubt. Kara was officially on his list of friends to call when Starling was under attack, and she was definitely on higher position than a certain bat from Gotham City who regularly offered his help just to annoy Oliver.

When he felt two arms wrap around him from behind, a familiar, small body snuggling up to his back, he smiled. With a content smile, he leaned back a little and stroked his hand over the forearms on his stomach.

“You’re brooding,” Felicity whispered. She pressed a kiss to his back between his shoulder blades through his shirt. “You should be celebrating.”

“I am not brooding,” Oliver replied.

With a last look to Kara and the kids, he turned around to Felicity and wrapped his arms around her. In the meantime, Felicity took the glass of champagne from him, closed her eyes and inhaled the fruity scent of the liquid.

“Soon,” she whispered to the champagne with a reverent tone in her voice, “very, very soon, you and I will be best friends again. I promise. There’s nothing and nobody that will ever part us again.”

Oliver grinned in amusement, stroking the tips of his fingers up and down her back. “Felicity, you do know that you sound like an addict when you talk like this, right?”

“I am not an addict. I am just desperately longing for a glass of champagne or wine… or a bottle of both,” Felicity said with a sigh. She inhaled the scent once more before she handed him back the glass. “I haven’t been drinking in almost two years.”

Oliver smiled sympathetically. He knew how much Felicity enjoyed a good glass of wine for dinner. He also knew she was a hundred percent against even taking a nip of any alcoholic drink as long as she was pregnant or breastfeeding.

Oliver puckered his lips for a moment before he lifted his glass to his lips and took a sip of the champagne, making sure the liquid touched his lips. As soon as he had swallowed, her caught Felicity’s lips in a gently kiss. Her tongue slipped out of slide over his bottom lip and Oliver smiled at the little hum she left. When they broke the kiss, Felicity licked her lips and rolled them into her mouth to chase the fruity taste of the champagne.

“Very good,” she said with a smile.

Oliver leaned back in to kiss Felicity once more. Before his lips could touch hers, they were disturbed, though.

“Oliver?”

Releasing a little growl, he only pecked Felicity’s lips shortly before he turned towards Barry and Kara, who were coming closer to them.

“I gotta go feed our daughter,” Felicity whispered.

She kissed his cheek and left his side. When she turned around to leave, she winked at their friends. Something about the expression on her face made him narrow his eyes. It was almost like the three of them were sharing a secret. The thought made Oliver cross his arms in front of his chest as Barry and Kara stepped closer.

“What?” he asked.

“Well, we felt like now that the city is saved,” Barry started and looked at Kara.

“Maybe it was time for a group hug,” Kara finished his sentence. “You know, leader of Team Arrow and Team Flash and Team Supergirl in one big hero hug.”

“Yeah, I am not much of a hugger,” Oliver replied.

Kara perked up her eyebrows. “Your kids would disagree. Emmy told me that you are a superhugger and I would have to get a hug from you.”

“I make exceptions for them.”

When Kara cocked her head and pushed her bottom lip forward in a pout, Oliver rolled his eyes. He spread his arms with a chuckle, barely believing he was doing this, and only a moment later he was caught in a group hug by the two of them. He sighed quietly, shaking his head. He doubted Central City would ever be not too sunny for him.


	245. Working mom

“That sounds like a good offer, but I think we need to discuss the parameters of the collaboration once more,” Mr. Stagg said, leaning back in his leather chair and looking at Felicity with slightly pursed lips. “Since Queen Incorporated is in charge of the project, I think it should carry the risk of failure completely.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. She had suspected that something like this would happen. Mr. Stagg had been working in the business for almost half a century. He had built his company, Stagg Industries, from scratch when he just been out of school and now it was one of most successful companies in the sector. The long work had earned him the reputation of being a tough cookie and Felicity guessed, since he was on the scrap heat, being a woman didn’t really play into her hands either.

Oliver had asked her if she was sure she wanted to collaborate with Stagg Industries when their CEO was like that. Felicity wanted what was best for Queen Incorporated though and that meant collaborating with Stagg Industries. If she had to bite the bullet of working with a man who hadn’t arrived in the twenty first century yet, she’d do it for the sake of her employees and the science. Besides, Felicity had never actually shied away from a challenge and she wouldn’t start now.

“You know, Mr. Stagger, I am tempted to agree to your condition because I believe in this project,” Felicity said, “but unfortunately I feel like giving into this is not the best start for our cooperation. When Queen Inc. is supposed to carry the full risk, then I don’t see why Stagg Industries should be granted equal parts of the turnover in case of success. It doesn’t seem quite fair to me. Either its fifty-fifty no matter what or we have to negotiate a deal that allows Stagg Industries to carry less of the risk but also gain less of the money we make.”

“Well, since Stagg Industries brings along broad experience in this field of-“

“-I think we both know that my father-in-law was the one who started the project this is based on. Stagg Industries only took over after he died,” Felicity interrupted him. “Your company took profit from the project Queen Consolidated had to abort because of Robert Queen’s unexpected death and the time of uncertainty that followed after. While I understand that you saw a chance there and used it and there is nothing wrong with that, I think you should take into consideration that the media will probably-“

Felicity stopped when the door to her office opened. She had told Oliver that she was having an important video call and didn’t want to be disturbed. Working from home always entailed the risk of being interrupted. The kids, especially Tommy and Millie, had their trouble accepting that when mommy worked in her office here at home, it was almost like she was in her office in the company and they couldn’t just come to her all the time. Oliver had promised her to keep an extra eye on them for the afternoon to make sure they wouldn’t disturb her.

Not bothering at all that his mom was sitting on her desk with a pack of files right in front of her, Tommy crossed the room and crawled onto Felicity’s lap.

“Just a second, Mr. Stagg,” Felicity asked.

To Felicity’s surprise and relief, Mr. Stagg nodded and leaned back in his chair once more. Felicity was definitely not ashamed of being a working mom. She loved her family and she loved her job and she had always done her best to meet the needs of both. While her family was very understanding and supportive, the business world was a lot harder. She had to fight against being labeled as just a working mom which seemed to be divided into the categories _heartless businesswoman whose kids were just a status symbol_ and _incapable mommy who only worked to prove something to herself._ The fact that she had taken several months off from work in the last two years because of two pregnancies didn’t make it any easier. The world just wasn’t nice to people who didn’t want to be pigeonholed.

“What’s wrong, buddy?” Felicity asked gently and kissed Tommy’s head. “I thought daddy wanted to play with you guys.”

“Addie’s crying,” Tommy replied with a sigh. “Can I stay here?”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hand over her boy’s hair. “Mommy has to work, you know?”

“How much longer?”

“I don’t know yet,” Felicity replied honestly. “When I am finished here, I promise we play something together or we go to the playground, okay? I just have to end my phone call with Mr. Stagg and-“

“Mama!”

Felicity bit her tongue, suppressing a desperate whine. Of course, the kids had to interrupt her during this very video call of all the things she had worked on here in the last few days. She would have to consider locking herself in here when there were important phone calls or similar things. She just didn’t like the thought of shutting the kids out, no matter what she was doing.

“Hi, Millie,” Felicity said happily nonetheless, refusing to show the kids that their timing was actually quite bad. “Did you climb the stairs again?”

“Yes,” she replied with a giggle.

She walked over to her mother and brother and hugged Felicity’s leg. Smiling, Felicity moved her fingers through Millie’s dark hair. She couldn’t ask the kids to just go back downstairs. Millie could climb up the stairs, but Felicity was sure she’d fell face-forward down there if she tried going down and there was no way she’d risk that.

“Tommy, can you do mommy a favor?” Felicity asked.

“Yes,” Tommy replied, nodding his head immediately.

Felicity smiled. She knew her little boy was the best for doing mommy any favors.

“Can you please go downstairs and ask daddy to come here and get Millie?” she asked.

“Okay,” Tommy responded with a sigh.

Felicity smiled and kissed her son’s cheek once more. “Thanks, buddy, and tell daddy to give all of you ice cream, okay?”

“Okay,” Tommy replied excitedly.

While he was running out of the room, Felicity grabbed Millie and pulled her onto her lap. She kissed her little girl’s cheek before she turned back around to the computer with an apologetic smile.

“I am really sorry,” she told Mr. Stagg honestly. “My husband and I thought it was a good idea if I had an office here at home, so I could work from home and spend more time with the kids. It’s a little hard for them to understand that even if I am at home, I am working.”

Mr. Stagg nodded slowly. “I see.”

Felicity pulled her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it firmly. She didn’t know what exactly to make of Mr. Stagg’s face. Either he didn’t really care about the interruption, or it has just caused her the deal. Admittingly, as much as Felicity would like to close this deal, if her kids were a problem for him, she could very well live without it.

After a long and awkward moment of silence, finally Oliver hurried into the room. He had his lips pressed together, an apologetic and slightly uncomfortable expression on his face.

“Sorry,” he whispered as he came closer and took Millie from Felicity’s lap. “Come on, sweetie-pie. We go downstairs and eat ice cream.”

“Mama?” Millie asked.

“Mama has to work,” Oliver told her, carrying her out of the room. “Mommy’s coming downstairs and eat ice cream later.”

With that, he closed the door behind them. Felicity released a soundless sigh. She cleared her throat, turning back to the computer. Somehow, she had to redirect the conversation to the professional subject and get back to the thought she had just been about to state when Tommy had interrupted. She had been in a good bargaining position.

“What do you think about next Wednesday to sign the contract and discuss the future of our project?” Mr. Stagg asked, pulling his Filofax closer and puckering his lips. “I am in San Francisco to watch my grandson’s baseball game at that time and could come over to Starling for an hour or two. It would be great if your lawyers could send my lawyers the contract beforehand, so they can take a look and we get it done quickly on Wednesday.”

Felicity cleared her throat, forcing herself to smile, when she said, “Mr. Stagg, I think we still need to discuss the distribution of the turnover, positive and negative, because-“

“We share equally,” Mr. Stagg interrupted her matter-of-factly. “Stagg Industries gets the same turnovers as Queen Incorporated in case of success, so it should carry equal part of the risk as you pointed out.”

Felicity opened her mouth to reply, but didn’t know what she was supposed to say. Seconds ago, she could have sworn that Mr. Stagg would maintain his ground for a couple more hours until her head would explode and she’d give in just to end this call and get back to her kids. He had seemed to be so set on his opinion.

“I don’t know what to say,” Felicity admitted honestly.

For the first time since Felicity knew Mr. Stagg, she saw him smile. He leaned forward, folding his hands on the tabletop. He almost looked like a nice, old grandpa in this moment and not the cold businessman she had gotten to know so far.

“You maintained your ground and you made good points,” Mr. Stagg told her. “I like to work with people who know what they want and stand up for it and won’t let themselves be knocked down just because they are talking with someone with a few more decades of experience.”

Felicity nodded slowly. She had never thought about it like that. Admittedly, she loved the challenging appointments more than the others too. A success she had fought for hard was a lot more reason to celebrate than a success that had dropped into her lap. She had always thought she was the only person crazy enough to choose a challenge over relaxation. Well, she and Elle Woods.

“I have to say I am surprised,” Felicity said honestly, releasing a little chuckle. “I really thought you were going to keep negotiating with me just for the sake of it and maybe because I might have appeared to be a little unorganized.”

Mr. Stagg chuckled. “Because your kids came into your office in the middle of this video call?”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied.

“They are kids. That happens. You handled it very well,” he told her. “I have seen CEOs ignoring their kids in cases like these. People in our positions do have to be a little colder than really we are or even like to be at times, but that should never happen when our kids are around.”

Felicity smiled, nodding slightly. Mr. Stagg was right. She was behaving a lot tougher when she was at work, having this non-bullshit-attitude, at least when she was focused enough to suppress the babbling part of herself. Anyway, she doubted that she could be this kind of person in front of her children.

She remembered how, while she had been recovering from the depression during the pregnancy with Tommy, Oliver had done a video call from home. He hadn’t even changed into formal pants. He had just put on a dress shirt, a jacket and a tie and sat down at the kitchen table. When Emmy had handed him her play phone, he had taken the call. He hadn’t been able to ignore her, either.

“So, we will see each other on Wednesday,” Felicity said.

“Indeed.” Mr. Stagger nodded. Felicity was already about to hang up when he cleared his throat and added, “Mrs. Queen?”

Felicity looked up. “Yes?”

“Have you ever met your father-in-law?”

“No,” Felicity replied honestly, shaking her head. “Robert died long before Oliver and I got to know each other."

“Then I hope as one of Robert’s close business partners and as an old man you allow me to say a few words to you in private,” he asked and waited until Felicity gave him a nod before he explained, “Robert would have been really proud to know his company was in the hands of someone who knows what to do with it. When we last talked during a Christmas party the year before that boat went down, he told me that Queen Consolidated has always been a second family to him, admittedly one he knew better how to deal with. He had been worried about its future given his son hadn’t seemed to be too interested in taking over. He would be relieved, happy and proud to know that you are part of both of his families now. He would have really liked you.”

Felicity smiled, weirdly touched by his words. Oliver had told her something similar a few times already. Yet, hearing it from someone who wasn’t conventionally forced to say nice things to her was kind of making it more real and it made her happy. What person didn’t want their parents-in-law to like them?

Well, Oliver certainly didn’t want her father to like him given what he had done to her. Lucky them, Noah probably didn’t like Oliver anyway. It only proved what good of a man Oliver was in comparison to her father.

Once in a while, Felicity had wondered if Moira had liked her. Since Felicity had tried to force her into telling Oliver who Thea’s father was and Moira had done her best to keep Felicity from doing so by putting emotional pressure on her, sometimes she doubted it. If Oliver and Thea could be trusted, Moira would have welcomed her in her family and at the head of the company anyway if she was still alive. She was making Oliver happy and despite everything that she had done, she had never wanted anything more than for her children to be happy.

“Thank you,” Felicity eventually replied with a thankful smile.

Mr. Stagger nodded and ended the phone call. Felicity leaned back in her chair with a deep sigh, closing her eyes for a moment. People could say what they wanted, but Felicity loved being a working mom and she loved working from home. For today, she’d call it quits and spend the rest of the day with the kids. There was ice cream waiting for her downstairs, and Felicity felt she really deserved that now.


	246. The Punishment

“You do know that your behavior could be easily seen as kind of creepy, right?” Felicity asked without opening her eyes or stopping to wash the shampoo out of her hair. “Just saying.”

“We are happily married. You are naked, wet, really hot and it’s not even the first time I watch you taking a shower, so why wouldn’t I do it now?” Oliver asked back and Felicity could hear the smirk in his voice. “Just saying.”

Felicity opened her eyes and smiled when she saw Oliver leaning in the doorframe with his arms crossed in front of his chest. His eyes were roaming up and down her body, taking in every inch of her. She felt the tingling of her skin that had told her that she wasn’t alone any longer intensifying. She doubted that the way Oliver looked at her when she was naked would ever cease to make her feel aroused.

With a low sigh, Felicity closed her eyes. For a few seconds, she leaned back under hot stream of water once more. Sooner than she really wanted to, she turned off the water and grabbed her towel, though. While she was wrapping the fluffy fabric around her breasts to cover her body, Oliver approached her. He put his hands to her face, gently framing it as he leaned in and captured her lips in a soft kiss.

“Spoilsport,” he whispered against her lips before he kissed her once more. His hands moved down her neck and arms to her back. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her against him. “How about you go back into the shower and I join you there?”

Felicity groaned and rested her head against his shoulder, replying, “Every night, but not tonight.”

It had been a long day. She had been in her office at six a.m. already for an important video conference. After that, she had rushed from one appointment to the next. After four weeks of being back to work, the days of slowly getting back into it were over and the current projects of the company challenged the top of her abilities. She had already been about to fall right into bed when she had come home this night at after eight. All she had wanted to do was check on the already sleeping kids, take a shower and fall into bed. Instead, an Arrow emergency had come in, so Oliver had left and Felicity had offered technical support from home which meant her shower had taken a backburner for five full hours.

“Are you falling asleep like this?” Oliver asked with a chuckle.

At that, Felicity startled from the microsleep she had fallen in. She quickly shook her head and blinked with her eyes a few times.

“No, I am not,” she lied. “Of course, I am not. That would be crazy.”

Chuckling, Oliver kissed her forehead. “You get ready. I will wait for you in bed.”

With that, Oliver turned around and headed to the bedroom. Felicity could hear him taking off his shirt and dropping it to the floor. Her gaze moved to the vanity basin. She knew she should wash her face and put on some lotion. She probably should also comb her hair and maybe even blow dry it at least enough, so she would be able to tame her wild curls tomorrow.

When she heard the mattress dip, she threw her good plans to the wind and followed Oliver into the bedroom. She dropped the wet towel to the floor, climbed into the bed in all her naked glory and snuggled up to Oliver, who wrapped his arm around her body and kissed her forehead. As soon as Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder, pressing her forehead against the side of his neck, his fingers started combing her hair gently.

“You won’t be able to get the knots out tomorrow if you don’t comb your hair,” Oliver whispered and rested his stubbled cheek on her temple. “You are going to regret this tomorrow.”

“But I definitely don’t mind today,” Felicity mumbled in response.

“Fair warning, I might say ‘I told you so’ tomorrow.”

“I might tell you ‘I hate you’ in response,” Felicity replied with a low grumble. “Fair warning.”

While Felicity yawned, snuggling even closer to Oliver, he chuckled. He pulled the blanket higher on her body, making sure she was wrapped up in warmth. At the beginning of July, that should not be much of a problem, but for some reason this week hadn’t meant well for them regarding the weather. It was colder than Felicity had ever experienced in summer.

“Did you set your alarm?” Oliver asked.

“Mhm,” Felicity hummed. “Did so right after waking up this morning.”

“Good.” Oliver released a low sigh. “Do you mind if I read a little before going to sleep?”

“Just stop talking and let me sleep,” Felicity asked grumpily.

“Since you asked so nicely.”

“You are still talking.”

Oliver only chuckled at that. He tightened his arm around her. His chest moved under her a little and Felicity could hear the drawer of his nightstand being opened. Oliver got back into the position of before and stopped moving. With a sigh, she snuggled her cheek against Oliver’s chest and enjoyed the quiet that filled the room now. She knew she had sworn herself never to work until she was almost passing out from exhaustion again, but she just couldn’t shake off being a workaholic. She loved her job and she knew she had no reason to be worried about her other responsibilities, mainly because she knew her kids were in best hands with Oliver.

Felicity opened her eyes for the break of a second. She just wanted to check on what Oliver was reading when usually he didn’t read much and instead used every opportunity given to watch her sleep. As soon as she realized what he was reading, she opened her eyes once more, though. With a surprisingly quick movement given that she was actually half-asleep already, she ripped the papers from his hands, balled it up and held it against her chest.

“I have at least fifteen copies,” Oliver told her matter-of-factly. When Felicity threw the balled-up paper away with a little growl, Oliver chuckled. “Hey, we put this list to beneficial use already.”

“That was one time,” Felicity replied, “and it’s like forever ago.”

“Yes, because you were pregnant and we don’t try new sexual things when you are pregnant and might get hurt,” Oliver told her. “Remember, we talked about that.”

They had indeed talked about that. Oliver might be a fearless vigilante by night, but he surely was a very protective husband by day, even overprotective at times. The most of their sexual fantasies they had collected were quite harmless and no dangerous extreme sport.

“You are not pregnant anymore, though,” Oliver whispered and stroked his fingertips up and down Felicity’s spine, leaving a path of goosebumps on her skin. “We could work on ticking off some of the wishes on your list.”

Seeing her list of sex wishes in Oliver’s hand had pushed away some of the tiredness. Puckering her lips, Felicity rested her chin on Oliver’s shoulder and looked at him. She had never wanted him to see the list of sex wishes she had noted, especially since some of them were just crazy ideas she had only chosen because she had been mad at Oliver or at Little Oliver actually. She wasn’t really eager to try them, but they had come to her mind and she had noted them to have something to focus on instead of the terrible need she had felt deep in her bones. Maybe she should have written a list like that when she wasn’t horny all the time because of the pregnancy hormones that had driven her so crazy about sex that Oliver hadn’t been able to keep up any longer.

“We could also work on your list,” Felicity replied. “Actually, reminds me that you still have to write your wishes down.”

“I am not going to,” Oliver told her and kissed the tip of her nose. “It’s much more fun working on your wishes.”

“The last time we used one of mine. Now it’s your turn again.”

“The last time we used one that was on both our lists,” Oliver corrected, “and we have been working on mine for a long time.”

“That was a gift,” Felicity told him. “It doesn’t count.”

“It counts for me.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. She loved having sex with Oliver, no matter how or where. She had loved fulfilling his fantasies with her because it had been a new kind of challenge and Felicity just loved challenges. Anyway, she wouldn’t fight him on this one. If he wanted to make her fantasies come true, so be it.

“Whatever,” she said with a sigh. “If you want to fulfill one of my fantasies, fine. You can pick one since you got the list.”

“Well, I actually still have trouble understanding some of them,” Oliver admitted honestly. “Like what the hell is _The punishment_?”

“Oh, I can’t tell,” Felicity replied, stroking her hand over Oliver’s abs teasingly. “I can only show you.”

Oliver puckered his lips, narrowing his eyes on her. She knew that he knew that there had to be a lot of teasing in the fulfillment of that fantasy since she had added _Little Oliver deserves it_ to the title. He didn’t know that this fantasy had come to her mind only minutes after Oliver had told her that they had to limit the numbers of times they had sex. He didn’t know how much teasing she had in store for him if he chose that wish.

“Fine, then it’s settled,” Oliver replied. “Should I ask around who can take the kids?”

“No, no,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “That won’t be necessary.”

Oliver frowned. “Are you sure?”

“Very sure,” Felicity replied. She pecked his lips shortly before she snuggled her cheek back to his shoulder. “I will take care of everything. I will need two or three days of preparation, but you will see when it starts.”

“Okay then,” Oliver replied. He kissed her head and slid deeper into bed until he was in a lying position. “Goodnight, hon.”

“Night,” Felicity whispered back.

Felicity bit down on her tongue, holding back an amused grin. Oliver was so going to regret choosing this fantasy. Of course, she could tell him now, but where would be the fun with this?

 

 

If Oliver had really thought it would be fun playing out some of Felicity’s fantasies, he certainly hadn’t remembered that Felicity could be quite mean if she wanted to. Obviously, when she had noted that wish on her list, she had wanted to be mean.

When Oliver heard another loud moan from their bedroom, he released a dark growl. It rumbled deep in his chest, making his body vibrate. Pressing his lips together, Oliver grabbed the remote and turned up the volume. Though the sportscaster’s voice drowned out Felicity’s sounds of pleasure now, it was still hard to focus on the baseball game. Knowing his wife was upstairs in their bedroom, pleasuring herself with this new favorite toy of hers, was quite distracting.

Oliver sunk deeper into the cushions of the couch, thinking about how it had all started five days ago. He had taken Emmy to Deepa for another slumber party because obviously spending time with her friends was just so much cooler than being home with daddy. Everything seemed to be cooler than daddy lately – friends, class, weird aliens from other worlds that Barry had dragged along… He was drifting of topic, though. So, he had dropped Tommy and Millie at Thea’s and Roy’s place as the two liked to practice for their own kids. When Oliver had come back home, he had called out for Felicity, wondering where she was. When he had heard her moaning, he had grinned, thinking Felicity was using the time to get into the right mood for some alone-time. He had basically undressed on the way to the bedroom, ready to just jump into bed and make love to his wonderful wife. As soon as Oliver had stepped into the bedroom, he had stopped though. Felicity hadn’t just been getting into the right mood. She had actually made herself come, using a vibrator to pleasure herself. To say the sight had been turning on was an understatement. He had watched her touching herself before, but never had she used a toy for it. He had waited until she had ridden out her pleasure. When she had calmed down, he had suggested joining in on the fun, but Felicity had just shrugged her shoulders and told him she had had her fun and needed to feed Addie and get back to work then.

At that time, Oliver hadn’t quite understood what she was doing. Within the last few days, it had become clearer and clearer, though. Felicity was preferring sex with her new toy over sex with him or at least that was what she was trying to make him believe. She excused herself for a moment, only for him to hear her use the vibrator to get herself off a second later. She let him work her up into the right mood, tell him she wasn’t in for sex and waited until the next opportunity given to use the vibrator again. She had had more sex in the last five days than they probably had all month. It was almost like she was back to her level of sex during her sexual overdrive.

Of course, eventually he had gotten the point. They had been deep into playing out Felicity’s fantasy of punishing his inability to keep up with her sexual overdrive during her pregnancy with Millie. Unfortunately, Felicity’s sexual fantasy didn’t include his sexual release.

He knew he had to do something. He just wasn’t sure what exactly Felicity wanted him to do. It was her fantasy, so he couldn’t just do what he wanted which would be destroying the vibrator and remind her of how much better sex was with him than with a toy. What if Felicity had other plans, though?

When Oliver heard the steps on the stairs, he grabbed his bottle of beer and took some gulps. He heard Felicity going into the kitchen and opening the fridge. A few seconds passed before he heard her steps approaching.

“The TV is quite loud,” she stated and Oliver could hear the amused smile in her voice. “I guess you are at an age that this is necessary.”

“I am not that old,” Oliver replied, rolling his eyes.

“You are thirty-eight. In two years, we are going to celebrate your fortieth birthday,” she replied. “Besides, you do have quite some great hair.”

Oliver grumbled some incoherent words and rolled his eyes once more. Puckering his lips, he asked eventually, “Are you finished?”

Felicity released a low chuckle. She crossed the rest of the distance towards him and put her arms around his throat loosely. Snuggling her cheek to his, she asked, “Don’t be mad at me, okay? For now, I really like my big, new friend. He’s so… good. I am sure sooner or later your time will come again.”

“Sooner or later,” Oliver grunted frustrated.

“You’re grumpy,” Felicity whispered. She kissed the spot right under his ear. “Why are you being grumpy?”

Oliver frowned. “Are you serious?”

“Maybe,” Felicity simply replied.

When Oliver turned his head at that answer, frowning at her, Felicity cocked her head. She was smiling at him innocently, but there was a playful glint in her eyes. Only now Oliver knew with certainty what Felicity wanted. She wanted him to react, which way whatsoever.

Oliver bit down on his tongue, considering to just go through with his plan of destroying that vibrator and reminding Felicity of how much better sex with him was. Hearing her moan again and again in the last few days, even though they had established that loud moaning served other reasons than actually proving how aroused you were, had made him long for sex. He could definitely take her upstairs now and show her his good stamina.

“Are you coming to bed now?” Felicity asked and kissed his cheek. “You might have missed the main event, but you can join in on the snuggle after.”

Oliver stroked her forearms and ducked his head to kiss the soft skin at the crook of her elbow. “I am going to watch the game.”

“Are you sure?”

Smiling, Oliver leaned his head back and beckoned for Felicity to come closer. Their lips met upside down in a gentle kiss.

“I’m sure,” Oliver replied. “I’ll come upstairs later.”

“Okay,” Felicity replied. She stroked her hand through his hair and down his neck to his shoulders. “Don’t stay up too long.”

“I won’t,” Oliver promised and kissed the palm of her hand. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” Felicity said back and kissed his temple before she left.

Oliver waited until he heard the door to their bedroom being closed upstairs. Only then he allowed a wide grin to spread on his lips. He was definitely not going to go with his plan of just destroying Felicity’s sex toy and have sex with her. It would be far too easy. Felicity had started this game because she wanted to play, so play he would.

Puckering his lips, Oliver wondered how he could join in on the fun. He could just ignore her and act like her little sexual adventures with the vibrator didn’t bother him. He knew it would drive Felicity crazy if he pretended not to care. She didn’t even have to believe him. Knowing he could pull himself together enough to pretend not to care would be enough. Oliver didn’t want to just ignore her, though. He wanted to actively be part of this fantasy, even the foreplay Felicity had initiated with all the teasing because Felicity herself had always been so creative about playing out his sexual fantasies. They had all been perfect.

When a long yawn escaped him, Oliver squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and rubbed his hands over his tired face. It was definitely too late to think about such an important decision. He’d think about it tomorrow.

Oliver pressed the red button on the remote, trying to switch the TV off. When it didn’t react, he sighed and hit the remote on the edge of the couch table a few times. Yet, the TV still didn’t switch off. It was probably the battery that was dead Oliver decided. With another sigh, he got up and switched off the TV with the button at the underside of the screen.

Just when he did so, he got a great idea and his lips spread into another smirk. He threw the remote into the air and caught it again.

“Felicity,” he whispered to himself, looking at the ceiling like he could look right through it into the bedroom he shared with her, “you are so going to regret this game you started.”

 

 

Letting the door fall shut behind her, Felicity slipped out if her shoes and kicked them away. She dropped her purse and her keys to the floor carelessly and stretched out her arms over her head. She could hear clunks in her back that gave away the long hours she had spent behind her desk today. The yawn that escaped her only added to the proof of what kind of day she had gotten through.

Felicity went right over to the living room and leaned into the frame of the door there. Oliver was lying outstretched on the couch with his arm under his head and watching TV. He looked relaxed. His toes were even moving in the rhythm of the music that was playing. With a content smile, Felicity rested her head against the doorframe and continue watching him. She loved when he had one of these relaxed moments. Usually, he only had them when she or the kids were around.

“How was your day?” Oliver asked her eventually, not turning his eyes away from the TV.

“It was okay,” Felicity replied. “Where are the kids?”

“Quentin and your mom took them.”

“All four of them?” Felicity asked.

With a chuckle, Oliver turned his head towards her. “Yes, all four of them.”

“Did you-?”

“-give them expressed breast milk as well as milk powder in case Addie is very hungry with them?” Oliver asked and cocked his head. “This is not the first of our babies I am giving away for a night.”

“Right,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. She puckered her lips for a moment before she approached Oliver, leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his throat from behind. Sneaking her fingers under the neckline of his shirt and stroking her fingertips of his collarbones, he asked, “So, we are all alone?”

“We are,” Oliver replied, not taking his eyes off the TV.

Frowning, Felicity lifted her gaze to see what was airing there. Her frown deepened when she saw it was some documentation about the Arrow and his companion.

“Something interesting?” she asked.

“No,” Oliver responded, shaking his head. “Just the usual stuff of what happened since he appeared, the good and bad he’s done and the current results of the investigation. Nothing we he wouldn’t know was going on, though.”

“Why are you watching it then?”

She knew if she and Oliver didn’t laugh about what abstruse ideas the media came up with about Starling’s vigilantes, he’d usually get sad and brooded about all the mistakes he had made when he had just started this. Felicity watched his face carefully, looking for any reaction. It took a moment before Oliver grinned at her.

“Boosting my ego?”

Felicity chuckled, playfully slapping his shoulder and straightening back up. “That really sounds like you.”

“It does,” Oliver replied with a wide grin before he turned his head back towards to TV.

Cocking her head a little, Felicity puckered her lips. “I think I might go upstairs and use the time to, you know, enjoy myself a little.”

“Have fun.”

Felicity frowned. She replayed Oliver’s voice in her head over and over again, trying listen for any sign of frustration or grumpiness. She had refused to have sex with him in a week, using a vibrator instead. Of course, she always made sure that he knew she was using it and that it brought her great pleasure which was true, even if she knew Oliver was a lot better at bringing her great pleasure. Yet, Oliver’s voice sounded relaxed and like he didn’t care much that she was going to go upstairs and have fun with her toy when he was here, available and probably more than willing to join in on the fun.

There was no way Felicity could deny that she was almost a little bit disappointed by his reaction. A few days ago, at least he had been a little bit grumpy. Now, he seemed to be completely at peace with the fact that she was choosing a vibrator over him. She had thought he’d go crazy within the first forty-eight hours. Maybe, she would have to move up a gear.

“I will,” she replied. “Hey, we could watch a movie around ten. I think my new friend and I will need this long. He is really persistent.”

“I am happy you found something that makes you so happy,” Oliver replied. “Should I go to the video rental store and look for something great?”

“You do know that we can rent movies online, right?” Felicity asked, stroking her hand through his hair. “No need to leave the house.”

“Okay, then I will scroll through the possibilities and pick something.”

Felicity puckered her lips, disappointed about his ongoing indifference. She shrugged her shoulders, turned around and headed to the door. She thought about just going upstairs, but she chose otherwise. With a teasing grin, she opened the zipper at the side of the dress and pulled it over her head to take it off. She threw it over to Oliver where it landed on his head, covering him.

“Hey, what’s that supposed to tell me?” Oliver asked.

He pulled the dress from his head and turned his head towards her. As soon as he saw her standing in the door in nothing but a new set of lingerie she had bought a couple of days ago, the expression of confusion turned into arousal. Felicity could see his pupils widening at the sight, his eyes taking in the dark green lace thoroughly.

“Oh, I was just thinking in case you were going to do the laundry while I am upstairs, you could wash the dress too,” Felicity told him shrugging her shoulders. “Thanks, hon.”

She couldn’t stop grinning when she went upstairs, wiggling her hips as she walked to give Oliver a good view on her ass. Puckering her lips, she took off her bra halfway down the stairs and just let it fall down there. While she was strolling through the hallway to their bedroom, she also tugged off her panties and left them there. Hopefully, Oliver would see her undergarments down there, realize what he was missing out on and maybe take some action.

Felicity left the door between hallway and bedroom open. She tugged of the comforter and crawled onto the bed. With a low sigh, she rested her naked body against the pillows. She looked down her body, smiling at the sight. Fourteen weeks after Addie had been born she was almost back to her normal weight thanks to breastfeeding and some excessive workout trainings.

Maybe the wonderful sex she had had since Addie’s birth had been a favoring factor too Felicity thought to herself. She reached out her hand and pulled the vibrator from the last drawer of her nightstand where she had hidden it between some pairs of thick socks she always kept there for cold nights. She knew she would have to find a different hideout for it sooner or later, though. Her kids were too nosy not to snoop around her things and find that thing eventually.

With a low sigh, Felicity looked at the vibrator. If she was honest with herself, she hadn’t been sure about this plan at the start. Of course, she had wanted to tease Oliver and knew she wanted to have sex without him. She had doubted her idea with the vibrator, though, as she had never used one before. She had ordered one on the internet. She had responded to this model easily. Apart from the pink-glitter color and the name _Pink Rabbit,_ it had offered great featured with 64 different preferences for vibrations, intensity and thrust movements.

Well, Felicity obviously hadn’t known what she had been missing out on during all the time she had been single and had only used her fingers to make herself come. She hadn’t put much faith in that thing at the start, especially since she had been spoilt with Oliver and their amazing sex life. Yet, the vibrator had turned out to be a genius. Of course, the emotional connection she had with Oliver was missing and there were less surprises during the sex since the vibrator did exactly what she had programmed it to do. Given how little she had expected of that thing, to say she had been surprised by how well it worked up her pleasure and brought her great release was an understatement. The little vibrator stimulated her vagina perfectly and rubbed against her g-spot just the way she needed. With the additional mini-vibrator for her clit, it was the perfect toy for the quickies she needed it for to excuse herself whenever she wanted and show Oliver that he was replaceable for her sexual pleasure, not that that was really true.

With a low sigh, Felicity put the vibrator on the mattress next to her, closed her eyes and started touching herself. She would love to touch her nipples, but with the breastfeeding they were terribly sore and leaked milk every once in a while, so she knew it was no good idea. She stroked a hand over her stomach instead, moving the other between her legs and gently touching her folds. She imagined it were Oliver’s hands on her, touching her and stroking her. She imagined his deep blue eyes on her and watching her reaction to each of his touches.

It didn’t take long for her skin to start tingling with arousal. Her fingers slipped back and forth between her folds more easily as she was getting wet. Yet, she just continued touching herself like that for some more time. She bit down on her bottom lip, suppressing a low moan at the thought of having Oliver’s body covering hers and his lips sucking on the side of her neck. His fingers would dip into her wetness just a little before pulling out and thrusting back in, a little bit deeper this time. Felicity mimicked the movements with her own fingers, not holding back when another moan escaped her.

Felicity grabbed the vibrator from the mattress and switched on the first of the three programs she had saved. It was the program for warming her up, no clitoral stimulation and slow but hard thrusts with just a little vibration. She moved the tip of her silicon toy through her wet folds and held it against her entrance. Even the little vibrations were enough to make her moan out loudly. Putting her feet to the mattress and liftin her hips off the bed a little, she eased the vibrator inside.

“Yes,” she whispered before repeating it with a loud moan. “Yes.”

Her hips sank back to the mattress. Her right hand formed a fist around the sheet as her back arched off the mattress a little. The vibrator kept moving inside of her, heightening her pleasure, and Felicity pretended that it was Oliver’s cock that rubbed against her walls and thrust in and out of her with regular, hard movements.

“Oh yes!” she called out loudly, remembering that Oliver deserved a show. “Ohhhhh!”

After a while, Felicity changed to the second program, quicker thrusts with a wonderful vibration against her clitoris and against her g-spot. It was the program to make her come. Her back arched off the mattress even more and she dug her heels more into the mattress to move her hips. Of course, it didn’t change anything with the vibrator inside, but it did apply some additional pressure on her clit and it did enrich her fantasy of having Oliver here with him.

It wasn’t long until Felicity felt her toes starting to prickle. She moaned out loudly, her hand tightening around the sheet and-

“Yes, yes, yes, ye- What the hell-?”

When the vibrator suddenly slowed down before completely giving out, Felicity opened her eyes and frowned. She had been so close to coming. She had felt the orgasm pulling at her, her toes already dipping into the water. Only a few seconds longer and she would have been sucked into the ocean of pleasures, the waves taking her away into ecstasy.

She pulled the vibrator from her hot, pulsating core and took a look at the thing. She pressed the power button to try switch it back on. It didn’t work, though. Instead, the small, red light net to the power button blinked.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Felicity groaned. “I just changed the batteries yesterday you stupid, stupid thing.”

With another grown, she rolled onto her stomach and opened the topmost drawer. She checked for any batteries and almost released a screech of annoyance when she couldn’t find any. She always kept some in the drawers for her alarm and basically everything else that needed batteries. She was sure she had replaced the pack of batteries when she had used the last ones for Millie’s crib mobile. Emmy or Tommy must have stolen the new batteries for one of their toys.

“You can’t be serious, kids,” Felicity mumbled. “How would you feel if I gave you some chocolate and you could already feel it between your lips, but before you could take bite, I am taking it away from you. Not so great, hm?”

Felicity rolled her eyes and got out of bed. She had to press her legs together and rub her thighs against one another. She was so deliciously wet and ready.

Clearing her throat and getting a hold on herself, Felicity bent down and grabbed her silken dressing gown. With long and quick steps, she made her way downstairs into the kitchen. She opened the drawer next to the cutlery where they usually kept batteries in all sizes. The drawer was empty, though.

“Where the hell-?”

“Are you looking for something, honey?”

“Yeah, I am-“

Felicity stopped. With a deep frown, she turned around and looked towards the living room. Oliver was still watching TV, so his face was turned away from her. Replaying his words in her memory, Felicity realized that he had sounded amusedly. He was amused by this which could only mean one thing. With much more force than needed, Felicity closed the drawer and stomped into the living room.

“Oliver!” she shouted out.

“Yes, honey?”

Felicity walked around the couch to look at Oliver. He was holding a bottle of beer in his hands, still looking at the TV instead of her. Felicity narrowed her eyes, but Oliver just took some gulps of his beer. His face was almost like it was made of stone, the expression on it blank.

Yet, Felicity wouldn’t let herself be fooled. She knew that Oliver had taken them. With five kids, their house and household had to be well organized. They didn’t just run out of batteries and if they did, it was because of Oliver. He was the one responsible for the shopping. Either way, this was definitely his fault and the stoic expression on Oliver’s face didn’t really make it any easier believing in his innocence.

Oliver put the bottle onto the couch table and leaned back again. His eyes met hers for only the break of a second. Yet, it seemed to be enough for his amusement to break through onto his face. A wide grin spread on his lips.

“You took them,” Felicity stated.

“I took what?” Oliver asked, still looking at her with innocent eyes though his eyes had long given him away.

“The batteries.”

“What batteries?”

“Oliver,” Felicity said strictly. “Where are the batteries for my vibrator?”

“Oh, it stopped working? Really?” Oliver asked. “Hm, maybe you have to charge the battery by letting it rest a little.”

Oh, she knew this suggestion too well. He had suggested the exact same thing when they had been talking about Little Oliver’s failures, too. Oliver had even mentioned that it sounded like they were talking about a vibrator back then. Felicity bit down on her tongue hard.

“I want the batteries back. Now,” Felicity demanded and held out her open hand.

Oliver just leaned back into the cushions of the couch even more and grinned. “No.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well, you know when the kids want pizza for dinner, but I have already cooked dinner, so they can’t have pizza?” Oliver asked. “That’s when you say no. Maybe one other day, but today they only get what I will serve.”

Felicity sucked in a deep breath and bit down on her tongue once more. Well played, she thought to herself. If the situation was different and she wasn’t so deliciously wet and ready to come, maybe she would play along for a little while longer. She had waited one week for his reaction and he had managed to surprise her in the best way possible, though. There was no waiting right now.

“Fuck it,” Felicity whispered to herself.

She crossed the distance to Oliver, sat down on his lap and framed his face with her hands. Without giving Oliver much chance to react, she attacked his lips. She had barely started kissing him when Oliver pushed her off his lap and tugged her next to him.

“I’m watching this baseball game, hon,” Oliver explained to her, not looking at her.

“It’s a rerun of the game you watched earlier this week,” Felicity replied, frowning.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah, but I want to watch it.”

Felicity puckered her lips. A part of her wanted to put her hand and rub Oliver’s cock through the sweatpants he wore until he was hard and she could untie the bow at the front and tug down the sweatpants just enough to reveal him. She would lean forward and wrap her lips around him and tease him with her tongue, lips and teeth until he would have no choice but to give in. She wouldn’t let him win, though. She couldn’t make it too easy for him after all.

“Okay, so enjoy the game,” Felicity told him and kissed his cheek. “I’ll be back in fifteen minutes.”

That seemed to catch Oliver’s interest. When Felicity tried to get up from the couch, he grabbed her hand, lacing his fingers through hers to hold her back. Felicity looked at him,

“Where are you going?”

“Just to the gas station to buy some new batteries,” Felicity told him, shrugging her shoulders. “Since Little Oliver, once again, seems to be unable to do this, I guess I will just take care my big, new friend upstairs gets back to work. Thank God, I got him. I have no idea what I’d do without it. I mean-“

“Okay that’s enough.”

Felicity was almost at the door already when Oliver’s voice made her turn around. She barely had time to register that he was approaching her before he had already put his arm around the back of her knees and lifted her over his shoulder.

“Oliver!” Felicity screeched and quickly wrapped her arms around his waist to give her some support, so she would slip off his shoulder when he started walking up the stairs. “Oliver, what are you doing! Let me down!”

“No way,” Oliver replied. “You are coming with me now and I will show what I am able to do.”

“Promises over promises,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes. “Yet, I feel you fail to deliver and-Wow, careful here!“

Oliver had put her back on the floor so quickly and sweepingly, Felicity had almost lost balance and fell backwards onto the floor. Oliver’s arms had wrapped around her last second, holding her against him tightly. She could feel his hard muscles pressing to her body against the thin fabric of her dressing gown. It would be a blank lie to say it didn’t arouse her. She had longed for Oliver’s touch too long already to not be utterly turned on by the reminder of what his body felt like against hers.

Slowly, oh so very slowly, Oliver ducked his head. Felicity thought he’d kiss her and straightened up onto the tip of her toes already, intending to meet his lips halfway. Right before they would have made contact, Oliver angled his head away from hers, though. His lips brushed against the edge of her jaw and to her ear, though. His teeth grazed her earlobe, holding it between his front teeth and tugging gently. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, humming contently.

She heard a loud sound and turned her head to see what it was. A smile spread on her lips when she saw the vibrator on the floor.

“Hey, be careful with him,” Felicity told him playfully. “I might still need him. He’s so… reliable. At least if someone doesn’t manipulate the battery and hides any replacements. Besides, it’s a really great thing. Did I tell you all the features it brings with it because-“

Oliver captures her lips in a kiss. It started slow and gentle. His tongue moved over her bottom lip before stroking against hers. Eventually, he caught her bottom lip between his teeth and bit down sharply. Felicity hissed and immediately his tongue stroked over the spot once more, soothing the pain.

“Can your new friend do this?” Oliver asked her before he bit into her bottom lip once more, a lot more gently this time.

Felicity released a quiet moan. “No.”

“No,” Oliver repeated, nuzzling her cheek and the side of her neck. “I guess we have to check what great features your husband comes with, hm?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. “Sounds interesting.”

Oliver’s lips found the soft skin under her ear. He kissed there gently, then peppered a dozen of kisses down the side of her neck. When they found her pulse point, he kissed it shortly, way too shortly.

“Can your new friend to this?” Oliver asked.

His lips closed around her pulse point and started sucking gentle. Felicity moaned out. Her hand tightened around the sheet. She knew he was leaving a mark, but she couldn’t care less. This might actually be one of the few moments that she wanted to carry the mark of his lips on her skin.

When Oliver’s lips let go of her skin, Felicity replied, “No.”

“Again, a no,” Oliver whispered and clicked his tongue. He kissed her pulse point once more, just brushing his lips against the aching spot slightly. “How disappointing.”

“So disappointing,” Felicity agreed with a little sigh.”

Oliver stroked her hair out of the way, tugging it from her back over her shoulder to the side. His lips made contact with her spine, brushing a gentle kiss against the vortex at the nape of her neck. His body lowered onto hers, his chest pressing to her back. His pelvis pressed to her butt, his hard cock pressing against the cheeks of her ass.

“Can he at least do this?” Oliver whispered against her spine. He moved one hand over the curve of her ass, stroking her flesh. The other hand stroked up her chest over her ribcage and shoulder blade to her arm. He followed it down to her wrist, unclenched her hand from around the cheek and laced his fingers through hers. “Can he touch you like this, making goosebumps spread all over your body? Can he give you something to hold onto as the pleasure rises?”

“No,” Felicity replied, holding onto his hand more firmly.

“Another no,” Oliver whispered with a sigh. His hip started moving a little, his cock sliding between her wet folds. When the head of his length bumped against her clit, Felicity gasped for air. Oliver’s lips spread to a smile against her spine. “Can he do that?”

“No,” Felicity replied.

“Actually, makes me wonder what you like about him at all.”

“He’s huge,” Felicity answered without hesitation. “When he thrusts inside, he stretches my walls in a wonderful way and-“

Felicity gasped for breath once more when Oliver thrust in without hesitation. His cock pushed in all the way, his pelvis pressing against her ass.

“Like this?” Oliver asked, whispering it to her ears.

“Yes,” Felicity replied.

“What does he do then?”

Oliver kissed the soft spot under her ear before he blew a breath against her neck, making goosebumps elicit there.

“He thrusts,” Felicity whispered breathlessly.

She had been so close to coming before and Oliver had easily worked her back up. She was so wet and ready for him that his cock just moved inside of her perfectly. He pulled out slowly until only the tip of his cock was still inside of her. Then he moved forward, hard and quickly. His pelvis slapped against her ass, the sound echoing through the room. Felicity released a loud moan.

“Can he do this, too?” Oliver asked, repeating the movement once more. “Can he create that slapping sound that sets your nerve endings on fire?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “No, he doesn’t.”

Oliver didn’t reply to that. He just thrusted again and again and again and…

Felicity felt herself growing closer to her orgasm quickly. Oliver used just the right amount of hardness and gentleness. His movements made her slid up half an inch with every thrust, her clit rubbing against the sheet as he did so. The headboard of the bed bumped against the wall with each of his thrusts.

No matter the features, there was no way a sex toy could replace what Oliver could give her. The varying movements he created by angling his hip just a little bit different with each thrust and the way his whole body pressed against hers, keeping her down on the mattress unmoving, built up her pleasure in like no time. With how her legs were pressed together, she was tight and her walls grabbed his cock so perfectly should could feel each of his movements.

With one particularly hard thrust that made Felicity release a loud moan, Oliver stilled. His cock was buried deep inside of her, her walls fluttering around his length with the anticipation of the nearing orgasm. Oliver pushed their linked fingers further up the bed until they pushed against the headboard. His body pressed down on hers even more firmly, making it completely impossible to move now. Felicity tried to move, but it was just impossible. She released a frustrated groan.

“Sucks when you are really, really aroused and you are just are prevented from doing anything about it, right?” Oliver asked her, tugging at her earlobe with his teeth.

“Oliver, please,” Felicity begged.

“Please what?” Oliver asked back.

“Please make me come.”

Oliver hummed assessingly. “And what would I get in return?”

Felicity grabbed his hand even more firmly. She felt like her body was on fire. Every muscle was tightened, waiting for just one more movement to finally come. She could feel the waves of pleasure pulling at her already. The blood was rushing in her ears loudly.

“Whatever you want,” Felicity whispered.

“What if I want you to destroy your toy?”

“I’ll do it,” Felicity replied without hesitation. “Just make me come please.”

“And what if I want you to tell me that no toy could ever replace me?”

 “Usually you are not this talkative in bed.” Felicity groaned. When Oliver bit down on her shoulder, Felicity gasped for breath, though. If this wasn’t the second time in less than an hour that she was ready to come and couldn’t she’d probably disagree with him and let him convince her to give in a little longer. She didn’t have that patience right now, though. “Okay, fine, no toy could ever replace you. Happy now? Can I come now or do you fail to deliver what you promised?”

“Well,” Oliver whispered into her ear. “You tell me.”

With that Oliver pulled out and thrust back in firmly. Felicity moaned, feeling her pleasure growing even more. Her toes moved on the mattress, trying to dig in and lift her hips up against his, but Oliver kept her down. Oliver stopped moving once more. Felicity could feel how close to an orgasm he was too. His body was so tense against hers and his cock pulsating inside of her.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered.

That seemed to have been the final straw to break Oliver’s self-control. His hip thrusts against hers sharply. He didn’t still this time and pulled out to thrust again immediately. His thrusts grew quicker but not any less hard. With the third thrust, Felicity felt her toes starting to prickle. With the forth, her muscles grew so tense that it almost hurt. With the fifth, the pleasure spread through herself. Her mouth opened in a silent cry.

Even in the high of her pleasure, Felicity could still feel Oliver’s thrusts growing desperate. He thrust more quickly and more firmly, chasing his orgasm. Felicity tightened her hand around his fingers and pulled herself together to clench her inner walls around him, squeezing him hard. It was all Oliver needed it seemed. With a final thrust, he dropped his forehead against her shoulder and spilled inside of her.

His length was pulsating between her fluttering walls as they both came down from their pleasure. They were both breathing heavily, still holding onto each other’s hand. Eventually, he slipped out of her, making both of them groan. With his hands at her hips, he turned her around, and lay back on top of her. Felicity used her free hand to move it up and down Oliver’s back, scratching his scars.

With a hum, Oliver kissed the top of Felicity’s breast and asked. “Is this how you pictured your fantasy to go?”

“No,” Felicity replied honestly. “I thought you’d break that thing after a day and then shamelessly take me wherever we are.”

“I was thinking about it,” Oliver told her. He propped his head up onto his hand and smiled at her. “Then I decided for this version though it did cost me quite some self-control.”

“You did great,” Felicity told him.

“Better than your fantasy?” Oliver asked back.

Felicity smiled. “With you, it’s always better than any fantasy.”

“Oh, you are boosting my ego. I must have done really well.”

With a smile, Felicity pecked his lips and pushed at his shoulder to make him roll over. Felicity crawled to the edge of the mattress. She got up and walked to the bathroom. Looking back over her shoulder, she stated, “Given that you are not especially blessed with Little Oliver, you did your best.”

“Oh, wait, until I get you!”

He caught her before she had even put her first foot into the bathroom. His arms snuck around her waist, carrying her into the shower, where they engaged in a second round under the stream of hot water.


	247. More than just a nickname

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter today since the last has been and the next will again be longer. Besides, when I had the chapter finished the first time, half of it disappeared over night and I hate writing the exact same thing twice. :(

“How are you asleep again already?” Felicity asked, looking at Addie who was lying on Oliver’s side of the bed and seemed to be fast asleep. “You just woke up an hour ago and nothing exciting happened that could have tired you out.”

Shaking her head slightly, she crawled onto the bed and pulled Addie into her arms. At fifteen weeks, she had caught up on other babies her age almost completely. She had the right height and weight, no recognizable deficits in her development of mobility or anything else. Nobody would ever assume that she had been born so early that her start into life had been more troublesome than anything else. Seeing her sleeping daughter now, Felicity felt like the fear of losing her only hours after her birth was almost forgotten.

When Felicity caught some movement from the corner of her eye, she looked up to find William in the door. He was smiling at them.

“Hey, Addie, look who’s there,” Felicity whispered, moving her fingers against Addie’s tummy gently. “Your godfather is here.”

“She’s sleeping?” William asked. “Dad said she was awake.”

“She was,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “I left her out of sight for five minutes and she fell back asleep. It’s probably because someone refused to sleep during the night when she was supposed to.”

William chuckled. “She’s trouble.”

“She is.” Felicity nodded her head. “She’s still easy compared to Emmy and Tommy, even if that doesn’t mean that much considering how much trouble they were. She is trouble, but not that much trouble.”

“At least you have been spared from that.”

“Exactly” Felicity replied with a smile. For a second, she thought back to how difficult it had been, especially with Tommy. At the age of ten or eleven months, at least at times, he had been so dissatisfied with the world around him that he had bumped his head on the floor again and again, his head read and his lungs refusing to breathe. Quickly, Felicity shook her head and looked back at William. “Do you want to hold her?”

“If you don’t mind.”

Felicity nodded for him to come closer. William sat down on the edge of the mattress and Felicity handed Addie over to her older half-brother. She stretched out her arms and legs for a moment before she released a little sigh and was unmoving again.

“How’s school?” Felicity asked William.

“It’s okay,” he replied and rolled his eyes slightly.

Felicity chuckled. “Sorry. I always forget not every fifteen-year-old is as excited about school as I was.”

“You have been nineteen when you graduate from MIT,” William stated. “I’d say no teenager is as excited about school as you were.”

“Guilty,” Felicity replied with a sigh. She smiled at her stepson and daughter for a moment longer. “How are things with your mom and her boyfriend?”

Felicity knew that William didn’t particularly like Samantha’s boyfriend. He didn’t hate him. He had even admitted not really having a reason not to like him because he seemed to be nice guy and was great to her mother. Yet, he just couldn’t get warm with him. It had meant a lot to Felicity when he had told her about it.

“Unchanged,” William replied, shrugging his shoulders.

He didn’t say anymore, so Felicity let it go. She knew it William wanted to talk about it, he knew that he could come to her. Despite the troublesome start they had had and the fact that Felicity wasn’t his mother, they still had a great relationship.

“Felicity, can I ask you something?” William asked eventually.

Felicity smiled. “Sure. Everything.”

“Emmy told me that you chose Emmy’s, Tommy’s, Millie’s and Addie’s name because of the nicknames. You liked them if they ended on -y or -ie.”

Still smiling, Felicity nodded. “It has been a factor. There have been other reasons too, though. During the first pregnancy, Oliver and I really couldn’t agree on a name. He wanted Evelyn. I wanted Emma. Or maybe it was the other way around. I just don’t remember. I felt like Emmeline was somewhat of a compromise. The nickname didn’t really come into play there yet. Tommy was named after Oliver’s deceased best friend more than anything. Millie was named after a bath additive that smelled really great which is something she should probably never know because it sounds like a terrible idea, naming babies after bath additives. Well, and Addie’s name was already discussed for Tommy when we didn’t know he was going to be a boy. I pretended not to like it because I didn’t want Oliver to win the battle for a name. Anyway, you are right. The nicknames have been a factor, at least for Millie and Addie.”

“You know, there’s a nickname like that for William too,” William explained. “Yet, you never call me Billy.”

Felicity frowned slightly. “Do you want me to call you Billy?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. You call all your kids by their nicknames.”

“It’s not like it really was my choice. I just got sucked into it,” Felicity replied. She sighed, thinking back at the first months with Emmy. “Oliver and I really didn’t have a choice with everyone calling Emmy by her nickname. We tried to fight it at the start, but… yeah… we got used to it.”

“You fought it?” William asked.

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “We really tried. Oliver and I weren’t fans of nicknames before Emmy’s nickname took over. When we just got together, Thea wanted to call me Liz or Lissy or something like that. I don’t remember. Oliver was not amused. He loves my name and didn’t want it to be shortened. He’d never call me something like that.”

“You never call him Ollie, either,” William stated, frowning slightly like he had just realized.

“Yeah, never gonna happen,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes. “So, you see, as much as I like nicknames, they are not necessary or show my love. Oliver is the love of my life and I’d never use a shortened version of his name for him, especially not Ollie, and yes, I know it’s terribly corny to say such things to of a teenager.”

William chuckled. “I got used to the two of you being disgustingly in love with each other.”

“That’s so nice of you. Thank you very much,” Felicity said playfully and winked at him.

She felt urge to reach out her hand and tousle William’s hair, but he was fifteen years old and not five. It was terrible how fast the kids grew up. It still felt like yesterday when she had first met William in the hospital. He had been a shy, little boy though little seemed to be the wrong word, especially since he had been older than any of her other kids were now.

“So, what is that about you and dad’s nickname?” William asked. “Thea calls him Ollie and Laurel does so too. What’s so bad about it?”

“It’s not about the name per se,” Felicity explained, “but about what it reminds me of.”

“Which is?”

Felicity pulled her lips into her mouth, not answering. She didn’t like to talk about Oliver’s past too much, especially not with the kids. Oliver wasn’t the boy he had been before. He had changed a lot and holding his past against him wouldn’t be fair. Besides, she wanted their kids to only see the best of their dad. Of course, they knew Oliver hadn’t always been the perfect example of a stay-at-home-dad. He had partied and made some mistakes. Going into detail was something she had always avoided. At least her other kids were too young to know the entire truth of it yet.

“You do know that your dad wasn’t always… the guy he is now,” Felicity started slowly, still not sure what she was going to say. “I mean he…”

“Slept with my mom while he was with Laurel?” William asked.

“For example.”

“And has been on that boat with her sister?”

“Yeah, that too,” Felicity replied. She sighed before she explained. “Look, Oliver is not that guy anymore. He’s faithful and a great dad and a lot of other wonderful things. I just connected all his past behaviors to it. At the beginning of our relationship, I was really sensitive about that name. It got a lot better with time. Like Thea’s Ollie is so different from what I connect with Ollie. For her, he has always been this great big brother. What I am trying to say is, nicknames are more than just nicknames, especially because our names are such an important part of us. If you want me to, of course, I will call you Billy, but you shouldn’t feel like it’s necessary. I love your name. Okay, I love all of my kids’ names obviously, otherwise I wouldn’t have picked the names, but-“

“It’s okay,” William said with a smile. “I actually don’t like the name Billy much. I don’t even get why it’s a nickname for my name. It probably should be Willy.”

“Which would forever make me think of an orca when thinking of you.”

“I loved that movie. My mom and I have always watched it during New Year’s Eve. I haven’t watched it in forever.”

“We have the DVD,” Felicity said. “Tommy is crazy about the movie. We could watch it together. I would actually like to spend the evening with some good movies, maybe convince Oliver to order pizza and, I don’t know, make popcorn.”

William nodded. “Yeah. Sounds great.”

“So, you go downstairs and make sure Addie is comfortable,” Felicity suggested and got up from the couch, rubbing her hands together, “and I will drum the rest of the family up.”


	248. Relationship maintenance

Felicity knocked at the door once more, releasing a low sigh. When the door still wasn’t opened, she took some steps back, trying to see if there were any movements behind the windows. It seemed like her new neighbors just weren’t home right now.

With another low sigh, Felicity puckered her lips and looked down at the letter in her hand, addressed to Olivia Queenston. She and her husband, both at approximately Felicity’s age, had moved here three weeks ago. Within these three weeks, there hadn’t been a day that Felicity hadn’t found a letter for them in her mailbox. The Queenstons didn’t have a mailbox yet and having Oliver Queen and Olivia Queenston live next door to each other was probably a really rare coincidence that was just destined to lead to confusion.

Of course, Felicity didn’t mind going over and giving them their mail. She knew how exhausting moving to a new city or even just a new home could be. Olivia and Marc seemed nice, people to maybe become friends with once they had fully settled here. It was just that after this long day of work and with the still blazing sun, all Felicity had wanted to do was come home and maybe spend an hour or two at the pool with the kids. She had worked so much all week, she actually wondered if her kids still remembered what she looked like.

Taking a quick look around for somewhere to put the letter, a doormat or flower pot to keep it from flying off in case a wind should arise, Felicity realized the garage door was open. She guessed it was the best place for them to receive the letter, so she went over to the garage and stepped in. She put the letter on the small table with tools next to the door to the house and was already turning on her heels to head back to her own house when-

“Oh my God!”

The panicked shout made Felicity spin back. It took a moment before she noticed Olivia and Marc in the driver’s seat of the car. She was sitting in his lap, their naked bodies pressed together, while Marc’s lips were still wrapped around her right nipple. Olivia pulled at his hair until he let go and turned his head around, gasping for breath when he saw Felicity. When her eyes met Olivia’s widened eyes, she could feel heat forming in her face until her cheeks were probably just as flushed as Olivia’s.

“Oh my God!” she called out too now, quickly turning around and holding her hands in front of her eyes.

“Oh God, Felicity,” Olivia hurried to say. “I am so-“

“No, no, I shouldn’t have-“

“-sorry. We didn’t meant to-“

“- come in here like that. I just wanted to-“

“-have sex in here. We just-“

“give you your mail and-“

“-somehow it happened and-“

“Hey, your place, your can do everything you want here,” Felicity said over the rustling of clothes, feeling the heat in her face increasing. A little more and her head would probably explode. “I really just wanted to make sure you got the letter and now I gotta go and-“

“No, Felicity, wait,” Olivia asked.

As much as Felicity just wanted the earth to swallow her whole, she knew if she left now, she would never be able to look at Olivia and Marc again and she was sure they would feel the other way around too. That would definitely not be a good start for a possible friendship or to be good neighbors. It would probably haunt all three of them forever.

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and took in a deep breath. Putting on a polite smile that hopefully hid how embarrassed she was, Felicity turned around. She pressed her lips together and looked away when she realized that Marc still had trouble fitting his best friend into the tight jeans. This encounter was probably one of the five most embarrassing moment of her life and that meant a lot given she had even managed to be caught having sex by her daughter who had immediately blurted it out to John.

“Felicity, I am so sorry,” Olivia said once more. “Really, we just came home from the DIY market and maybe we’ve been intoxicated by the paint fumes or… I don’t know… we were just in the mood and then suddenly one thing led to another and-“

“You really don’t have to explain anything to me,” Felicity said, holding up her hands. “Really, it’s… it’s fine. I mean it’s not like I don’t know what it’s like to be married or to be crazy about each other or about sex or whatever. I mean Oliver and I got caught having sex quite some times too, even if never by neighbors, because we are not necessarily a boring suburban couple either. We do have sex, a lot of sex, a lot of creative sex actually and we are very open in our marriage and in general about sex and people having sex… I mean… people have sex all the time, with their partners or someone else or both or whatever… Anyway, this is not going to be a problem. We will just never talk about it ever again, like never ever again.”

Felicity had spoken so quickly she was almost out of breath now. For a moment, she wondered what had driven her to talk about her own sex life, even if only shortly, but she guessed there was nothing to be embarrassed about that. She hadn’t been the one who had just been caught having sex which of course wasn’t really that embarrassing either. It probably happened to a lot of people. Yet, she put on a wide smile that almost hurt in her cheeks to try hiding the embarrassment she could still feel in every cell of her body. She meant what she had said, it wasn’t exactly a big deal, but she doubted she would ever be able to forget it.

Olivia and Marc exchanged a short gaze before they looked back at Felicity who was still smiling so widely, she was sure they could see how uncomfortable she was. Eventually, Olivia cleared her throat.

“So this is-“

“-not a big deal,” Felicity repeated once more. She cleared her throat before she added, “Like I said, I am not stuffy. Oliver and I tried quite some things too. Just… better lock the garage door the next time. You know, there are a lot of kids living here.”

“Of course,” Marc replied immediately. “It will never happen again. We promise. We are really sorry.”

Felicity smiled, biting down on her tongue hard. Eventually, she gestured over her shoulder and took a step back.

“I gotta go,” she said. “My kids are waiting for me. And my husband. And the pool.”

“Oh, Felicity,” Olivia held her back.

Felicity stopped, perking up her eyebrows. “Yes?”

Olivia shot Marc a short look and he nodded his head in response. Olivia smiled and took a few steps towards Felicity, who pressed her lips together firmly and bit down on her tongue. She could only hope this wasn’t going to get any more embarrassing.

“Marc and I are going to invite some friends over at the weekend,” she told her. “We just want to chat, have a drink, dance and maybe have a little fun, you know?”

“Sounds great,” Felicity replied. “Have fun.”

“We were actually wondering if you and Oliver would like to join in,” Olivia suggested. “I think you guys would like that.”

“Okay, then,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “I have to talk to Oliver first, but I guess we will be there.”

“Great,” Marc said.

Felicity nodded and lifted her hand for a short wave. “Okay, then. Bye.”

“Bye,” Olivia said.

“And thanks again for… your discretion,” Marc added.

With a last nod and smile, Felicity turned around and headed back to her house. Once she was out of the Queenstons’ sight, she chuckled to herself, shaking her head. She had been in a lot of embarrassing situations in her life, her babbling alone had caused at least a hundred of them, but she doubted that anything had ever been as embarrassing as this. Her poor neighbors had looked like they had considered packing their stuff and moving away from here again already.

Admittedly, Felicity didn’t know what she had done if one of her neighbors had caught her and Oliver having sex less than a month after moving here. She still remembered vividly how embarrassing it had been to be caught having sex by Thea or John… and all the other people who had walked in on them already. Luckily, it had never been in the middle of intercourse at it had seemed to have been for Olivia and Marc. Well, if she thought back to that one time Emmy had caught them, though…

Still chuckling and shaking her head, Felicity unlocked the front door and stepped into her house. She left her shoes at the door and strolled over to the kitchen, poured herself a glass of water and took a few gulps.

“Okay, everyone get out of the pool as long as daddy is inside!” Felicity heard Oliver tell the kids in the garden and smiled. “Yes, Emmy, you too. I know you can swim, but nobody’s in the water as long as I am inside. If any of you gets in, pool time is over for today.”

Felicity emptied her glass and put it away at the kitchen counter. When Oliver came into the kitchen, Addie resting against his chest with her head on his shoulder, she smiled at him. She wore the cute leoprint swimsuit Thea had bought for Millie a year ago.

“Hey,” Oliver said, stepped closer and pecked her lips. “I didn’t hear you coming back.”

“I just came in two minutes ago. I just wanted to drink a little water before getting into my bikini and join you and the kids on the pool,” Felicity told him and took Addie out of his arms. “Hi, sweetie-pie.”

“Sounds great. The kids are completely hyped.” Oliver went to the fridge and got a cool bottle of water out. “We have spent almost all day outside. It’s just too warm for doing anything but staying outside and swimming. Tommy is doing great, no floaties all day.”

While Felicity was stroking her hand up and down Addie’s back, she watched Oliver taking some gulps from the bottle. With the way his head was rested back, she had a really great view on his muscular chest.

Felicity sighed. “You are right. It’s even too hot to look at you.”

“What a shame.” Oliver chuckled and clicked his tongue, closing the bottle and putting it back into the fridge. “I guess it’s the downside for every couple in summer.”

“Well, not every couple.”

Felicity looked at Addie to find her daughter smiling at her happily. She tapped the tip of her forefinger against Addie’s nose and lowered her head to kiss her baby’s forehead when she giggled and waved her arms in response.

“What do you mean, not every couple?” Oliver asked eventually.

Grinning, Felicity looked up at him. “I brought Marc and Olivia their post and guess who was having fun in their car?”

“On the street?” Oliver asked, eyes widening even if there was amusement sparkling in his eyes.

“No, in the garage,” Felicity replied, “but still. I mean the door was unlocked. Everyone could have gone in there.”

“And they were in the middle of-“

Felicity nodded. “Indeed.”

Oliver chuckled. “Wow.”

“I didn’t even know what to say. What to do you say when that happens?” Felicity asks. “It’s already embarrassing when your friends catch you or you catch them, but at least you and they can laugh about it and shrug it off. They just moved here. Really, if the wrong person had caught them, say Mrs. Hoffman for example, they could have packed their stuff and moved away to another city because she would have told it everyone in the entire city.”

“I hope you made sure they know that they don’t have to do that?” Oliver asked, still chuckling. “Or do I have to devour you in our pool tonight and give them a good audio drama of what a lovely family life in Starling looks like?”

Felicity chuckled. “You don’t get to devour me until autumn when it’s getting colder.”

“I am sure I will find a way to convince you,” Oliver replied, puckering his lips. “I just take that as a challenge.”

Felicity grumbled to herself for a moment, knowing Oliver would indeed not rest until he had seduced her into having sex. While that wasn’t something bad per se, with how hot it was, she felt like having Oliver’s hot body covering her, no matter how good he would make her feel, would take away from their enjoyment. She was sure Oliver wound find a way to prove her wrong, though.

“Anyway, we are invited over to a party at their place at the weekend and I think we have to go if we don’t want them to wish the earth would swallow the up whenever they see us.”

Oliver chuckled. “Alright. I ask your mom and Quentin to watch the kids for a few hours as soon as we know when exactly the party is going to take place.”

“Good,” Felicity said. Sighing, she kissed Addie’s forehead and handed her back to Oliver. “Here, you go outside with daddy. Mommy is going to get into her bikini and follow you guys outside for the pool par-“

When they heard the splashing of water outside, followed by Tommy yelling, “Daddy! Emmy’s in the pool!” Oliver sighed.

“I know one kid whose pool party just ended.”

Felicity nodded. “She just needs to find out the hard way.”

Oliver turned around and headed to the garden. Puckering her lips shortly, Felicity followed him. As soon as she stepped outside behind him, Tommy came running towards her and flung himself at her. Felicity lifted him onto her arms and held him close, knowing it was what he needed. He was four years old already, but he was still a mommy’s little boy and Felicity hoped that would never really chance she thought, looking at where William and Millie were sitting on a blanket under the sunshade, playing together. When the young girl saw her mother, she waved at her before she got up and walked towards her, hugging her mother’s leg. Felicity stroked her hand over Millie’s head.

Meanwhile, Oliver lay Addie down on the blanket to her oldest brother and went to the edge of the pool.

“Emmy, out of the pool,” he said strictly.

“Oh-oh,” Millie said, holding onto Felicity’s leg a little more firmly and looking at her mother. Smiling comfortingly, Felicity stroked a hand over her daughter’s hair. She snuggled her cheek to Felicity’s thigh and repeated, “Oh-oh.”

“Daddy, I was just-“

“Doesn’t matter,” Oliver interrupted Emmy. “Out of the pool. Now.”

When Addie released a low cry, Tommy struggled out of Felicity’s arms. She let him down and he immediately took Millie’s hand and took her with him to their younger sister to comfort her. As much trouble as Tommy had had when Millie had been born, he did his best to be a good brother for Addie. Just sometimes he still took his time and went upstairs into his room to enjoy some time alone with his special light.

Felicity sat down on the edge of the Bali bed, watching Emmy swimming to the edge of the swimming pool. She got out, her lips puckered and angry tears in her eyes. She crossed her arms in front of her chest stubbornly. With a sigh, Oliver went onto his knees in front of her and tugged her closer.

“What did I tell you guys before I went inside?” he asked her, his voice a lot gentler now.

“Not to go in the pool before you come back.”

“Right.”

“But-“

“Do you know why I asked you not to go into the pool?” Oliver asked her.

“Because you don’t want us to?”

Oliver nodded. “Exactly. I don’t want you to go into the pool when I am not here. I know William and you are good swimmers, but it’s always possible that something happens, you know? You could bump your head when you are diving and hurt yourself very badly. Besides, Tommy is still learning how to swim and Millie can’t swim at all without her floaties. If they see you in the water, they will want to go inside too, though.”

“That’s not good,” Emmy said, “but-“

“No buts, sweetie,” Oliver told her. He gently tugged at a strand of Emmy’s hair. “I told you not to go inside the pool because I was worried about you and your siblings. Do you understand that?”

Emmy nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” Oliver replied, gently stroking his hand over her hair. “But I told you what would happen if you went into the pool though I told you not to. Pool time is over for you for today.”

“But, daddy, mommy just got home,” Emmy said.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “And mommy is going to get into her bikini and go into the pool, but you won’t get into the pool again today.”

“Not even the feet?”

Oliver shook his head. “Not even the feet.”

A heartbreaking sob escaped Emmy as she turned her back on her father and went over to Felicity. She crawled onto her mother’s legs and rested her head against her chest. Felicity smiled sympathetically, rubbing her hands up and down her daughter’s back comfortingly and rocking her back and forth in her arms like she was still a little baby.

“Mommy, say something,” Emmy asked between two sobs.

“Sorry, sweetie, but there is nothing I can say,” Felicity replied, “because daddy’s right. He told you what would happen if you got into the pool before he came back. You didn’t listen.”

“I just wanted to get the ball outside,” Emmy cried against Felicity’s shoulder.

“But that’s no excuse,” Felicity told her and kissed her head. “When daddy says, you are not supposed to go into the pool, you can’t go in. Come on, mommy goes upstairs to change. You can get your coloring book and then come back downstairs with me and draw a little here.”

“I want to swim.”

“Not today, sweetie.”

“Then I want to stay in my room until I can,” Emmy cried.

Felicity sighed. “That’s a pity because mommy thought, even though you can’t come into the pool, you’d still like to spend time with us. I barely saw you all week.”

“No.”

“No,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “Well, then mommy is going to be very, very sad.”

Emmy sniffled and leaned her head back. “Can I color with watercolors?”

Felicity nodded. “Sure. Should we get the colors and papers for you to draw on?”

Emmy nodded. She rubbed her hands over her eyes and wiped away the tears. “Are you still going to be sad now, mommy?”

Felicity smiled. “No, I am not.”

“Good,” Emmy replied and kissed her mother’s lips. “Now, let’s get the watercolors.”

 

 

On Saturday night, Oliver and Felicity strolled towards the Queenstons’ home hand in hand. Felicity rested her head on Oliver’s shoulder and yawned. He smiled, kissing the crown of her head and squeezing her hand.

“Tired?”

“Maybe a little,” Felicity replied before she lifted her head off his shoulder and looked down at herself. “Do you feel like I am overdressed? I feel overdressed.”

Felicity wore a red, embroidered dress. The V-neckline allowed a wonderful sight on the sides of her breasts without giving away too much. The short skirt accentuated her strong legs in the best way possible. Her makeup was natural, her hair updone. Oliver took her in once more though he had already remembered every detail about her look while he had been watching her getting ready.

“You look beautiful,” Oliver told her truthfully. “And if you’re overdressed, who cares?”

“I know you don’t.”

“Well, if it makes it easier for you, I promise to undress you when we get home.” When they reached the Queenstons’ front door, Oliver knocked and leaned over to whisper into her ear, “There is no risk of being overdressed when you aren’t wearing anything.”

Felicity pressed her lips together and slapped his butt. “Behave.”

“But’s so hard when you are spanking me in publicity,” Oliver teased.

“I warn you, Mister,” Felicity replied, slapping his butt once more, even harder this time.

“Oh, and now you are getting bossy and growly,” Oliver continued. “It’s so arousing.”

“Oliver Jonas Queen-“

“Oh, my full name, I am in trouble.”

Just when Felicity slapped his butt once more, just because she could, the door opened. Marc cocked his head at them. Despite having seen much more of her neighbors’ marital fun than they had of theirs, Felicity still blushed a little. When she put on an innocent smile, Marc chuckled and beckoned them inside.

“Great that you could make it,” he said with a smile.

“We brought some wine,” Oliver explained and lifted the bottle of white wine in his hand.

“That’s great. Thanks, man,” Marc replied, taking it from him. “Make yourself at home. Drinks and food are in the kitchen if you want anything. The main event starts at ten. Felicity, all choices will be up to you.”

Before Oliver or Felicity could have asked what exactly he meant, Marc already disappeared into the kitchen. Felicity leaned her head back to look at Oliver with perked up eyebrows. He just shrugged his shoulders and kissed the tip of her nose.

“Can I get you anything?” he asked.

“Nope, I am fine,” Felicity replied. Linking her fingers with his, she suggested, “Let’s meet new people.”

They followed the sounds of the voices that led them to the large living room. Oliver observed the group of people. Five seconds were enough to know some of the most important things. There were twelve people in there, including Felicity and him, six women and six men. They were all approximately their age, some maybe a little younger and some maybe a little older. According to the rings at their left hands, they were all married. A sixth second made him realize that apparently there seemed to be an invisible line running through the living room, separating the part of the room that was reserved for the ladies and that that was reserved for the men.

“Do you think we can risk stirring up the group formation here?” Oliver asked.

“Maybe once they get to know us and realize we are not rebelling against their party rules,” Felicity whispered back, squeezing his hand.

Smiling, Oliver lifted Felicity’s hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. She shot him a smile before she let go of his hand and joined the group of women, while Oliver joined the group of men. Marc thrusted a bottle of beer into Oliver’s hand introduced him to his friends – Leo, Norman, Andrew and Daniel – who all knew each other from some club in Iron Heights Oliver had never heard of before.

“Well, I am a little disappointed you didn’t come to my club, then,” Oliver said.

“You have a club?” Marc asked, frowning.

“Yes,” Oliver replied and took a gulp of the beer. “Verdant. It’s in the Glades. My sister and my brother-in-law have been managing it for years now. Technically, it’s still my club, though.”

“Well, it’s not exactly our kind of club,” Andrew explained, “if you know what I mean.”

Oliver had no idea what he meant, but it had been supposed to be a joke anyway, so he nodded. “Sure.”

“Your wife looks familiar,” Leo stated, turning his head back over his shoulder to look at Felicity. “Have I seen her in a club or something before?”

Oliver frowned slightly at the way Leo’s eyes roamed over her body, taking her in a little too carefully. He ignored that though. Felicity was highly attractive and the dress did its best to highlight that after all. He knew he shouldn’t be angry. Men liked looking at her. He should probably take it as a compliment for her. It just annoyed him sometimes.

“I think it’s been more than two years since Felicity has been clubbing the last time,” Oliver replied. “Maybe you know her from the news. She’s on it sometimes with her company, Queen Incorporated.”

“That’s your company?” Norman asked. He whistled appreciatively. “I didn’t think billionaires would live around here. Isn’t Castlefall the neighborhood for billionaires in Starling?”

“Maybe.” Oliver shrugged his shoulders, trying to figure out how to change the subject. He didn’t really want to talk about finances. He cleared his throat. “Are you guys living in Starling?”

“Annie and I live in the suburb,” Daniel explained. “We are thinking about moving here, though. All we can currently afford is the Glades, though. Not really an option, especially since we are thinking about having kids.”

“I heard homes in the North District are getting more affordable,” Leo explained. “Lucy and I live right around the corner. There are good school districts.”

“Do you guys have kids?” Oliver asked.

“Twins, seven years old. The boys are a lot of trouble, but I couldn’t love them more,” Leo replied. He shot a look at his watch and quickly added, “Let’s not talk about the kids, though. It’s only half an hour until things get started. Felicity is the one in charge. Any bet who she might pick or does she prefer surprises?”

Oliver chuckled. “Depends on the situation I guess.”

Daniel gave him a look. “Well, take this situation.”

“Oh, excuse me for a moment. I’ll be right back,” Marc said suddenly and left to the kitchen.

“So, who will be Felicity’s pick?” Leo asked.

For a moment, Oliver frowned, wondering what was going on here. When Normal wiggled his eyebrows, Oliver’s frown deepened. Slowly but surely Oliver dawned that maybe this wasn’t the kind of party he had suspected.

Daniel chuckled, patting Leo’s shoulder. “You have to excuse him. Leo likes to be in control about things, so he hates if new couples join in and the wife gets to make all the choices. He’s a little control freaks during these parties.”

Oliver nodded slowly, narrowing his eyes at the three of them. “Excuse me for a second.”

Without another word, Oliver turned around and went to the kitchen where he had seen Marc disappearing. Oliver’s fingers stroked along Felicity’s back when he went past her to the kitchen. His neighbor was currently putting some more bottles of beer in the fridge. When Oliver approached him, he turned his head and smiled.

“Hey, are you enjoying the evening so far?” he asked. “At first, Olivia and I weren’t sure if it was a good idea to invite you. We don’t know each other that well, so we don’t know your comfort zone yet, but Felicity said you are both very open, so…”

Oliver pushed his tongue into his cheek and puckered his lips, nodding slowly. He released a low hum. “What exactly did Felicity tell you about us?”

Marc pulled his lips into his mouth for a moment before he closed the fridge and turned around to Oliver, saying, “I guess she told you that she caught Olivia and me while we were…”

“Yes.” Oliver nodded. “And like she said, there is nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“Well, we definitely will take more care in the future. Anyway, Felicity already calmed us. She said she’d understand because you were free spirits and having an open marriage and-“ Marc stopped when Oliver pushed his hands in the pockets of his pants and puckered his lips. Marc watched Oliver for a moment. “Please tell me she wasn’t just fooling around with us.”

“Oh, it was definitely not on purpose,” Oliver explained. “Felicity has the talent to say what she means in a way that makes it sound like something completely else, especially when she is excited, worried, angry or embarrassed. I think catching you in the act might have caused her brain-to-mouth filter to fail.”

Marc swallowed, blank panic in his eyes. “You don’t usually go to swinger parties?”

A swinger party, Oliver thought to himself. He had thought there was some sexual connotation to this whole thing. He had even guessed that it would be a swinger party, but he had prepared himself to be surprised for something else. Well, at least Leo’s behavior made sense now though Oliver felt his fingertips tingling uncomfortably at the way Leo had looked at Felicity, probably imagining what would happen if she would choose him.

Oliver cleared his throat. “No, never.”

“Oh my god,” Marc said, slapping his hand in front of his eyes. “Olivia and I thought this was a good idea to wriggle out of the embarrassment and now we got even deeper into it. This never happened to us before. We-“

“There is nothing to worry about,” Oliver interrupted him quickly. “We don’t judge. Well, I don’t judge and I am sure Felicity won’t either. We are just not really interested in joining into something like this.”

“You must think we are crazy people,” Marc said, massaging the back of his neck uncomfortably.

“No. I think there are different ways to be in a relationship and I don’t doubt that for some people, sexual adventures like this are helping to maintain a relationship.”

“Yeah,” Marc whispered. “Olivia thought about breaking up with me three years ago. She loved me, but it just wasn’t enough. She wanted adventure. At the start, I was a little hesitant. I didn’t know if I wanted that, but I loved her so much that I didn’t want to lose her. I wanted to at least try and I was surprised that it worked and I actually felt comfortable with it. It does enrich our marriage after all. This is helping us.”

“I understand. For Felicity and me, that’s just not the case. Honestly, I can’t picture having sex with anyone but her and the thought of any other person touching her actually makes my stomach twist and turn. People are different, though, no reason to be worried. We won’t tell anyone.” Oliver made a short pause before he added, “Thanks for the invitation, but Felicity and I will back out here.”

Marc just nodded, still looking embarrassed. Since Oliver didn’t know what else to say, he turned around and went back to the living room, though. Felicity was currently laughing, her head thrown back in amusement. Oliver smiled at the sight. She was working way too much and could need some fun. If the party was heading to some other event, he would definitely want her to stay here all night and have fun.

Since things were the way they were, though, Oliver stepped behind her and wrapped an arm around her waist from behind. His lips found the soft spot under her ear, kissing her gently.

“Oliver, it’s against the rules,” Olivia said with a chuckle. “It’s supposed to increase the thrill of anticipation.”

Oliver put his chin to Felicity’s shoulder, looking at the faces of the other wives with a smile. “I am sorry to break your rules, Ladies, but I fear playtime is over for Felicity and me tonight.”

“What? Why?” the woman with the red curls asked.

“Yes, why?” one other asked. “The fun didn’t even get started yet.”

“Yes, why-“ Felicity started, turning her head to look at Oliver. When he just looked back at her intently, Felicity turned back to the girls and explained, “Well, you heard him. Time for bed apparently. He’s getting old. Don’t hold it against him.”

She patted his chest teasingly for a moment before she said goodbye to her new friends. Oliver laced his fingers with hers, said goodbye into the room and tugged Felicity outside. As soon as the door had fallen shut behind them, Felicity looked at him with a frown.

“What happened with showing them that there is nothing to be embarrassed about after I caught them in the act?” she asked. “The girls were really nice, even if I was a little surprised that they actually told me how much they would enjoy a night with you. I mean I am used to women undressing you with their eyes and imagining having you for a night, but most of them have the decency not to tell that straight to my face. Anyway, they seemed to be quite funny, so I didn’t mind the little joke.”

“I don’t think it was a joke, though,” Oliver told her. When Felicity frowned, he added, “I don’t know what exactly you said to them to convince them that being caught in the act won’t haunt them forever, I fear you might have exaggerated a little in how open we are to different lifestyles.”

Felicity frowned. “Like what?”

“Like so much that they thought we aren’t just tolerant but actually have an open marriage and were in for their swinger party tonight.”

With that, Felicity stood still. Oliver turned around to her, chuckling at the way her eyes were widened. He could almost see her replaying her memories in her mind like she was trying to assess them again now with the new information. She looked at him with her lips opened slightly, staring at him speechlessly.

Oliver chuckled. “It’s true.”

Finally, Felicity chuckled too. She put her hand to her chest. “Oh, no. I feel so sorry for them. Now they got even deeper into the embarrassment.”

“Which we don’t hold against them.”

“Of course not,” Felicity replied. She squeezed his hand and rested her head against his shoulder as they continued their way to their home. “I just don’t see how they will be able to forget about it. One situation like that was bad, two are… a nightmare. Do you think they will move away again?”

Oliver sighed. “I don’t hope so since there is really no reason to do so. We will talk to them tomorrow and tell them there is nothing to be worried about.”

Felicity nodded, not saying a word. From the corner of his eye, Oliver could see her biting down on her bottom lip. Her free hand stroked over the back of his hand gently, so Oliver kissed the crown of head. Felicity lifted her head from his shoulder and smiled at him.

“It’s weird, don’t you think?” she asked. “Swinger parties. I am not judging, but I think it’s weird.”

Oliver nodded. “Marc told me Olivia needed the sexual adventure and he agreed to it because he loves her. Now he seems to enjoy it too.”

Felicity hummed. “Loving someone so much that you give them the sexual freedom they need to maintain your relationship. Brave.”

Frowning slightly, Oliver stopped at the edge of their lawn and tugged at Felicity’s hand to pull her against him. He narrowed his eyes slightly and kissed the tip of her nose. Felicity smiled, wrapping her arms around his waist. When he kept looking at her, she perked up her eyebrows.

“If that had been us,” Oliver started, “and one of us would have needed something like that to maintain our marriage, do you think we would have agreed to think of something like that?”

Felicity sighed. Pushing her bottom lip forward, she thought about it for a moment before she cocked her head. “Honestly?”

“Yeah.”

“I can only speak for myself and how I would have reaction if you had asked me,” Felicity told him with a sigh, smiling soundly, “and you know I love you with all of my heart and all that I have, but I doubt that my love for you is selfless enough for that. I would want to give you everything you want and need to be happy, but I don’t think I would love you enough for that. Sex for us is a really important, really meaningful thing and, though I doubt it would be the same if you had had sex with another woman because it would be a much more sexual than emotional thing, I just think I couldn’t take it. It would drive me crazy thinking you touched any woman the way you touch me, no matter how little it would really mean. I think I am honest enough to say that I am too selfish to share certain parts of you with anyone else. I’d rather give up on what we have than agree to something that might keep you with me but would eventually drive me away from you emotionally. So, to sum all of that up, I love you, but not enough for that if we consider this a selfless sacrifice.”

Oliver smiled, framing Felicity’s face with his hands. He stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones gently and leaned in to kiss her. Felicity sighed against his lips, granting his tongue permission to slip into her mouth and stroke against hers. Her hands tightened in the back of his shirt, anchoring herself to him.

Oliver wasn’t sure if it really was an act of love to agree to something like that or if maybe not wanting to share the person you loved meant at least just as much. Either way, he was sure it depended on the people. For Felicity and him, that model of a relationship just wasn’t

When their lips parted, Oliver nuzzled her nose and replied, “I wouldn’t love you enough for that either.”

Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes and brushed her lips against his chastely before she said, “Who would have thought there is really a limit for our love to each other?”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s a high limit, if we consider it a limit at all.”

“Well, if it is, then your limit is probably even higher than mine,” Felicity added, “because, let’s be honest, you would definitely love me enough to say you agree and then just inconspicuously get rid of my lovers before they could actually become my lovers.”

Oliver puckered his lips, thinking back about the way he had felt about Leo’s eyes on Felicity’s body. That alone had been a lot to take. If he thought about where that would have ended if he and Felicity had decided to stay despite the swinger party, he didn’t doubt that he would have liked to snap Leo’s neck or whoever else Felicity would have picked.

Felicity chuckled, resting her forehead against his chest. “You look like you already fantasize about killing someone.”

 Oliver grinned, stroking his fingertips over her back. “I might.”

Smiling, Felicity rested her head back and smiled at Oliver. When he leaned in to kiss her once more, Felicity pulled back a little, though. Oliver perked up his eyebrows and Felicity smirked.

“I think my mom and Quentin don’t expect us to be back before midnight,” she told him. “What would you think about making a little detour to our beach house, maybe take a bath in the ocean, naked of course, and then see what happens?”

Oliver’s grin widened. “Did the last days tempt your desire to stretch your limits of privacy a little?”

Felicity puckered her lips. “Maybe.”

Oliver licked his lips. He pecked her lips only shortly before he started pulling her to their car in the garage. “Let’s not waste any time.”


	249. Batman vs. Overwatch

As soon as the stretched limousine he had sent to pick her up stopped, Bruce opened the door for Felicity. He held out a hand to help her out and, though Felicity shot him a look that made him know that she was absolutely able to get out of the car herself, she did take the hand offered to her. When Bruce used the opportunity to lift her hand to his lips and kiss the knuckles as soon as she was standing, she cocked her head.

Bruce just smiled, his lips still hovering right over the knuckles of her hand, when he said, “Felicity Smoak.”

Felicity puckered her lips. “Careful, Bruce, you are getting quite close to overdoing it.”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Bruce replied honestly even though the amused sparkle in his eyes gave him away. “I am just being a good business partner and friend.”

“Really?” Felicity asked. “I think as a good business partner and friend you should actually know that I am able to get to a business dinner without being picked up in a giant limousine and, even more importantly, you should know that my name is Felicity Queen. I am pretty sure it was my name when we first met already.”

“You can’t be angry with me because I am trying to spoil you,” Bruce told her, “and you have to admit that Felicity Smoak just has the better ring to it. The fact that I can pretend you dumped your useless husband and finally started looking for a husband that is tuned to the same wavelength as you is just the wonderfully sweet, little cherry on top.”

Felicity rolled with her eyes. “Let me guess, you are turned to the same wavelength?”

“Exactly,” Bruce replied with a wide smile. “I am so happy you see it, too.”

Releasing a sound that was somewhat between a grunt and a chuckle, Felicity slapped Bruce’s chest with her purse. It only made him smirk even more smugly.

“You are sailing dangerously close to the wind tonight, Bruce,” she told him, “and we haven’t even sit down for dinner yet.”

“Oh, let me right that please.”

Bruce offered his arm for Felicity to link with hers. When she shot him a slightly annoyed look because Bruce seemed to be pushing her limits really hard today, he quickly pulled his arm back and gestured to the entrance of the restaurant, though. Side by side, they walked towards the door that he opened for her. When he gestured for her to go in first, Felicity did and stopped.

When Bruce had suggested relocating their meeting to a restaurant, Felicity had hesitated. Of course, she knew Bruce was just fooling around and maybe tease Oliver a little bit along the way was probably adding to the temptation. She didn’t really have anything to fear from Bruce or his flirting since he would never seriously risk their partner- and friendship. Yet, she hadn’t wanted to reinforce his behavior too much. Since he had promised her a wonderful meal in a great atmosphere, she had agreed, though Felicity couldn’t really resist a good dinner after all. Seeing the empty restaurant now, she wondered what Bruce thought was a good meal. The lease costs were too high here at the beach to stand even a single day without an at least half-full restaurant.

“Okay, when you promised me a wonderful meal in great atmosphere, I didn’t expect this, you know?” Felicity told Bruce.

He chuckled, gesturing to the glass front that led out to the terrace from where you had a magnificent view on the ocean. Felicity puckered her lips, but followed his gesture outside. The terrace had been cleared apart from one table that had been set right at the banister. It was laid and decorated.

“I felt to enjoy the atmosphere properly,” Bruce said, stepped behind one of the chairs and gestured for Felicity to sit down, “I should rent the restaurant, so we have it all for ourselves.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, sitting down on the chair that was offered to her. “If that is how you spend your money, you definitely have too much of it, you know?”

Bruce chuckled, not answering. He went around the table and sat down opposite from her. A wide smile on his lips, he took the bottle of white wine from the cooler and opened it effortlessly. Not taking his eyes off her, he poured her a glass. He lifted his glass to his nose and tested the bouquet before he raised his glass to a toast. Puckering her lips, Felicity took her glass and raised it too.

“Felicity,” Bruce started his toast, “love of my live, fire of my loins-“

“Yeah, Oliver tried that one with me already,” Felicity interrupted him, rolling her eyes.

Bruce ignored that and just continued, “I am so grateful I got to meet you and joined in on your projects. You are the first person to challenge me cognitively as well as in other ways and I love every moment of it. Here’s to the success we had so far and to the success we will have in the future. You and me, we are destined for greatness. Cheers!”

They clinked glasses and Bruce took a sip of the wine, while Felicity put her glass just back to the table. Bruce perked up his eyebrows.

“Still breastfeeding,” Felicity explained to him.

“Then I will go into the kitchen and get you something else. I make the best lemon squash.”

“Of course you do,” Felicity replied and rolled her eyes once more, knowing exactly it was one the restaurant offered since Thea was addicted to it since she was pregnant. “Am I also supposed to believe you cooked the dinner when it’s being served?”

“Sure, if it helps to convince you of my qualities.” Bruce grinned. “Can I get you anything else when I get into the kitchen?”

“I am fine, thanks.”

“Then lean back and enjoy the sun a little,” he suggested. “I will be right back.”

Felicity watched him leave, shaking her head slightly about him and rolling her eyes once more. With a low sigh, she turned her head and looked at the ocean. The sound of the waves was soothing and Felicity closed her eyes, enjoying it.

A wide smile spread on her lips at the thought that not long ago she had enjoyed the very same sound with Oliver. After they had escaped their neighbors’ swinger party, they had gone to their beach house. They had skinny-dipped in the ocean before they had celebrated their love for each other with amazing sex. They had lain in bed after that, skin against skin, and whispered words of love into each other’s ear.

Felicity opened her eyes, looking at the ocean again. Last week she had let her work pull her in completely. She had worked nonstop, starting early in the morning and coming back late in the evening. There might have been a day or two that she hadn’t seen her kids while they had been awake. Sometimes Felicity wished she loved her job less than she did because she was sure it would be much easier to work from nine to five and be home to have dinner with her kids every day if she was bored and didn’t like her job as much as she did.

Despite having Oliver’s full support that he assured her of almost daily, Felicity had sat down with her assistant Emily and reorganized her entire schedule. She had established two days that she worked from home completely and another day that she was off at five, so she was home to have dinner with her family. As much as she loved her job, she knew she needed to make more time for her family. Her work didn’t run away after all. Well, Felicity doubted her family would run away, either. It wouldn’t hurt making sure they didn’t even get tempted to do so, though.

When her phone rang, she pulled it from her purse and smiled at Oliver’s sleepy face on the display. She had taken the photo as recently as yesterday and had earned herself a slap in the face with his pillow. It had been a low price to pay.

“I just thought about you,” Felicity said when she took the phone.

“Really?” Oliver asked. “I could have sworn Bruce would try his best to make you forget all about me.”

“He might try,” Felicity admitted, “but it’s a hopeless endeavor.”

“Glad to hear that.”

Felicity smiled. “Is that why you are calling? To check if Bruce behaved? I don’t know if you would say he behaved since he addressed me with my maiden name, rented the entire restaurant, called me the fire of his loins and is now pretending to make me dinner.”

“I might have to snap his neck sooner or later,” Oliver growled.

“Sooner or later, wow, I feel so loved right now.”

Felicity chuckled since usually Oliver’s answer would be more like _Don’t move because I am getting on my motorcycle and snap his neck right now._ Oliver trusted Felicity and he would never believe that there was really something going on between them. He knew Bruce just wanted to annoy them, but since some jealousy, as long as it was just teasing, never hurt, he went with it.

“Well, I would love to do so right now,” Oliver replied, his voice serious now, “but I am on my way to the lair.”

Felicity frowned. “What happened?”

“Bank robbery. They took a child as hostage and are currently fleeing. I tried to call Curtis, but I can’t reach him,” Oliver explained. “We need you.”

“I am on my way.”

“Thanks. Should I come and get you?” Oliver asked.

“No, it’s fine. See you later.”

“See you later. And I am really sorry for your dinner.”

Felicity chuckled, already taking her purse and getting up. “No, you’re not.”

“No, I’m not,” Oliver admitted shamelessly before he hung up.

Putting her phone back to her purse, Felicity went into the restaurant and to where she had seen Bruce disappear a few minutes before. She pushed open the door that said _Private_ and stepped inside. She put her hands on her hips and cocked her head when she saw Bruce standing right next to the cook and watched him preparing a plate with antipasti, while half a dozen of other staff was working around them.

“Well, I guess I caught you.”

Bruce looked up. “Hey, you weren’t supposed to look behind the magic.”

“Too bad,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders. “It doesn’t matter anyway. I gotta go.”

Bruce frowned, approaching her quickly. “Why what happened? Emergency at home?”

“No, at work,” Felicity explained, “the other work.”

“Oh.” Bruce nodded, then gestured towards the door. “I am here with my Lamborghini. I will drive you.”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied.

This was why she didn’t mind Bruce attempts at flirting with her. She knew he didn’t really mean it. He was just swanky and he liked to play and fool around. He respected her and her work, though. If it was necessary, he would stop all playing and fooling around and be serious, just like right now.

While he was driving her to Verdant, Felicity told Bruce what Oliver had told her about their mission. She checked on some information she could get about the bank robbery on her phone, but it just wasn’t much given it had just happened. She wished she had taken her tablet with her, so she could already get work started, but she had left it at home.

“So, what are you going to do about it?” Bruce asked.

“Well, I will find out where that bastards took the girl and Oliver and whoever else of the team will be there will chase them and hand them over to the police.”

“It’s not dark yet.”

Felicity shot him a look. “Well, unfortunately, criminals around here don’t necessarily wait until it’s dark to commit crimes. We can’t wait and let them increase their lead over us. Besides, the police came to the conclusion that the Arrow and his friends are helping this city more than they are damaging it. They don’t hunt them any longer.”

“Still not the smartest idea if you ask me.”

“Luckily, I am not asking you.”

“Feisty,” Bruce replied. “I like that.”

He stopped his car right in front of the back entrance to Verdant. Felicity unfastened her seatbelt, about to thank Bruce for taking her here and suggesting delaying their planned meeting to later, when he unfastened his seatbelt too. Felicity frowned.

“What are you doing?”

“Joining in on the fun,” Bruce replied matter-of-factly. “Let’s see if we harmonize in the field as much as we harmonize in every other aspect of our lives.”

Felicity was about to object, but Bruce already got out of his car. She knew there was nothing good coming from a discussion with him, though. Screwing up her face and grumbling lowly, she got out of the car and walked to the door where Bruce was already waiting. She hesitated and turned around to Bruce to say something, but decided against it. Sighing, she hit in the code eventually.

“I am so going to regret this,” she mumbled to herself and stepped into the lair.

She didn’t wait for Bruce to follow her as she quickly walked over to her working station. She might have hoped that the door had fallen shut before he could have entered, but she heard his steps behind her.

When she stepped into the front part of their lair where Oliver, John and Roy were already waiting in full gear, their heads turned around to her. Felicity waved with her hand, beckoning Roy to get up from her chair and stop working on her computers which he did immediately.

“Hey,” Oliver said. “Sorry I had to interrupt your dinner, but-“

“Oh, don’t worry,” Bruce interrupted him. “I just couldn’t rob her of my presence already.”

“I guess we started selling admission to the Arrow Cave after all?” Roy asked and grinned widely when Felicity shot him a look.

While John looked almost amused, Oliver shot a short look to Bruce before he looked back at Felicity. She stepped towards him and kissed his cheek shortly.

“I couldn’t shake him off,” she whispered and squeezed his hand apologetically before she went over to her working station. “Give me a moment and I will hopefully have a location on him.”

As soon as she had sat down, her fingers started dancing over the keyboard to check the cameras at the bank. There was some good footage and with a few more clicks she had the license plate number of the getaway car. She ran an automatized search for the number through all footage of traffic cameras and satellites in Starling and the close environment.

“We should have a location soon,” she said once more, breaking the tense quiet. She shot a look back over her shoulder, but quickly looked away again when she found Oliver and Bruce staring at each other. She cleared her throat. “Bruce, I think it’s not a smart idea to just head out there. You don’t know the streets and you don’t have your equipment here either, so-“

“Don’t worry. I have got this covered,” Bruce replied. “Just check the cameras outside.”

When Felicity did, she saw the Batmobile in the backstreet next to the Lamborghini. She frowned. “How did you- You know, forget it. I know you. You have your ways.”

Bruce chuckled and stepped behind her. He rested his forearms on the backrest of her chair and looked at the screens. “You have good tech here.”

“Of course I do,” Felicity replied. “Do you honestly think I would work with second-class equipment when it concerns the safety of this city never mind the life of my family and friends?”

“Still feisty,” Bruce said.

“You should take a step back,” Oliver growled eventually. “Felicity doesn’t like if people crowd her while she is working. She needs her room.”

Bruce grinned, but he lifted his hands defensively and stepped back. A moment later, Oliver sat down on the edge of the table right next to Felicity’s keyboard. She shot him a short look, but his eyes were still focused on Bruce.

When the loud _pling!_ of her computer finally announced that she had a lead, Felicity breathed out a sigh.

“They are heading south to the freeways,” Felicity announced.

“We get out,” Oliver announced. “You lead the way.”

Felicity nodded. While John, Oliver and Roy all headed out, Bruce stayed behind with her. She briefly registered Oliver was taking off his wedding bad, kissing it and putting it to the pocket of his leatherjacket. Then the door fell shut behind the three of them.

“What about you?” Felicity asked, already viewing several windows to check possible routes they could take, possible destinations and possible ways for her boys to stop them. “Don’t you want to head out, too?”

“I thought I was giving them a head start,” Bruce replied.

Felicity chuckled, not looking up from the screens. “You’re sure you don’t just try to find an apology in case my boys will get to them first?”

Bruce grunted, “Certainly not. I will follow now anyway. Will you-“

“-already interlinked the communication tool in the Batmobile with our comms.”

“Great. See you later.”

Felicity just waved with her hand absentmindedly. When the door fell shut behind him, she released a slow breath. That had been less weird than she had imagined. She could only hope that they would be able to pull themselves together now that they were out in the field.

 

 

Fifteen minutes later, Felicity could have slapped herself for even thinking it could work to have Oliver and Bruce in the field together. Really, she’d rather let him work at the side of a dozen assassins like back in the days when the city had been under Deathstroke’s attack than this.

Apparently, because there hadn’t been any time for a dick-measuring contest, the guys were taking it out in the field now. They had almost caught up on the criminals, but thanks to their pissing contest over the comms, they were both being terribly reckless. Felicity couldn’t remember when her heart had been racing this much the last time or when she had gasped for breath so often the last time. She usually trusted Oliver’s abilities and his judgement. With trying to prove something to Bruce or to her or maybe to himself, his judgement seemed clouded, though.

“Urge them to the next exit ramp and then in southern direction,” Felicity suggested. “I will direct you to an old factory property that is not used anymore. You can try getting them to stop there.”

“I will take care of that,” Bruce replied.

“I am already at their side, no help necessary,” Oliver growled in response.

Bruce didn’t listen. Over the footage from the satellite, Felicity watched Bruce speeding up the car and catching up to Oliver.

“Make room. I handle that,” Bruce said.

“Like I said not necessary,” Oliver replied.

Bruce directed his Batmobile closer to the getaway car, urging him on the right traffic lane. When the white van sped up and pushed back onto the other lane, its back pushed against the front of the Batmobile. The van spun out of control for a moment and if Oliver hadn’t braked sharply, it would have pushed him against the guardrail and crushed him.

“Bruce!” Felicity called out angrily. She quickly switched off Bruce’s and Oliver’s comms and said to Roy, who was following them on a second motorcycle, and John, who was driving the van, “Do something!”

“What are we supposed to do if your men are going crazy?” Roy asked.

Felicity growled, knowing he was right. There was nothing they could do. She switched the comms back on.

“Next exit ramp is there in less than half a mile,” Felicity said urgently. “You need to get them from the highway.”

“Arrow, make room,” Bruce demanded.

“Not necessary,” Oliver said between clenched teeth.

He took in a deep breath before he sped up his motorcycle and crossed the van’s way. Though the van did turn to the right and had no choice but to take the exit ramp, Felicity didn’t miss how close it had been. The motorcycle, and Oliver with it, was pushed a few feet down the street. If the driver of the van had changed course half a second later, and Oliver would have ended up under the car.

“Enough is enough,” Felicity whispered to herself. “John, I am sending you the route to the factory on the display. I am out for a moment.”

“What-“

Not listening to Oliver’s question, Felicity cut the connection to her and Bruce’s comm, keeping the connection between the two working, though.

“I would say I am sorry, Bruce,” Felicity said as she let her fingers dance over the keyboard quickly and transmitted the command by pushing enter, “but I am really not.”

Felicity watched the Batmobile slowing down further and further. It took a moment before Bruce seemed to get what was happening or at least that _something_ was happening.

“What is this?” he asked. “What is going on? What did you do?”

“Remember when you asked me to check if your Batmobile was hackable and I told you it wasn’t?”

“You said it wasn’t,” Bruce replied while he Batmobile turned into the next street and turned back towards the highway. “Felicity, what is going on here?”

“Well, your Batmobile wasn’t hackable anymore after I upgraded your security program and closed the one or two security fails there were,” Felicity explained, “but I basically placed an inactive virus into the system, so I was sure I had a way to hack your car if necessary.”

“What?” he asked. “Why?”

“I know you can be reckless when you are out there and I know you are working alone most of the time, so you don’t really have anyone to pull you back when you go over the edge. Since you are my friend, I wanted to make sure I had the possibility to do so if necessary, even if I am at the other side of the country,” Felicity replied. “I am your friend and I am worried about you and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Nothing was going on. Everything was fine,” Bruce growled. “Fuck! Why don’t I get a handle on this virus?”

“Because I am really good,” Felicity replied briefly.

“Felicity, stop this shit.”

“No,” Felicity replied firmly. “Your Batmobile is going to take you home now. As soon as Oliver, John and Roy will have our criminals, I will give you back control over your car, but only once it’s finished.”

“Why?” he asked. “Everything was handled.”

“You said you wanted to test if we harmonize in this part of our lives too,” Felicity explained, “and I feel the answer is no, so I am quitting this experiment for tonight. Bruce, you and me as Bruce and Felicity work together well, but you and me as Batman and Overwatch don’t. You are not used to working in a team, but that is absolutely necessary if you want to work with me and my people. My priority as Overwatch will always be to have my whole team come back to me safe and sound. You know, that is my husband there as well as my sister-in-law’s husband and one of my best friends. These people need to come home to me and Batman with his reckless lone-wolf-attitude is working against that. That is why you are going home. I don’t want Batman anywhere near my team.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, waiting for Bruce to reply. She meant what she had said. She had never planned on using this virus for anything but Bruce’s safety, but that didn’t mean that she was using it against him if necessary.

“Should we have really found a part of our lives where we are not compatible?” Bruce asked her eventually.

Felicity breathed out a relieved chuckle. Bruce was her friend despite everything. She hadn’t wanted him to be angry with her.

“What a shame,” she said. “Are you going to lose interest in me now?”

“Hell, no,” Bruce replied. “I take that as a challenge to figure out how we work in that last part of our lives we didn’t check for our compatibility yet.”

“I am telling you right now that I doubt we will ever check it out.”

“Why?”

“Because I am not going to sleep with you just for you to check what-“

“Woah, I was talking about videogames, love,” he told her. He clicked with his tongue. “Are you thinking about having sex with me often if you jump to those conclusions or-“

“Bye, Bruce,” Felicity interrupted him rolling her eyes.

She was just about to break the connection when Bruce said, “Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“Thanks for being my friend.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied and finally broke the connection.

When she saw that the criminals cornered and tied up, the girl safe in John’s arm, she deactivated the control she had over the Batmobile and finally activated the comms to her boys again.

“I sent your location to the police. Do you need an ambulance for the girl?”

“No, she’s fine,” John replied.

“Okay, great,” Felicity replied. “I am hanging up and heading home.”

 “What happened to Batman by the way?” Roy asked.

“Probably couldn’t keep up,” Oliver replied.

“Yeah, not really,” Felicity replied, her voice giving away how pissed she was. After she had picked a bone with Bruce, now it was her husband’s turn. They had been equally at fault for this mess after all.

“Felicity, I-“

“Not interested right now,” Felicity interrupted Oliver. “I am heading home.”

With that, she cut the line. She shut down the system, took her purse and left.

 

 

It took another thirty minutes after Felicity had come home until she heard the front door being unlocked. She took in a deep breath and leaned further back into the cushions of the couch, tightening her hold on Addie, who was nursing on her breast. She had woken up shortly after Thea had left home and cried until she had finally started drinking ten minute ago. She seemed content now.

“Hey,” Oliver whispered quietly.

Felicity looked up only shortly, seeing him leaning in the frame of the door. He had pushed his hands into the pocket of his pants and looked at her with guilty eyes. He had every reason to feel guilty. During the last ninety minutes since she had cut the line of the comms, her anger had only increased. She knew Bruce had provoked him, but that didn’t change the fact that Oliver had run unnecessary risks that could have cost him his life.

Not saying anything, she lowered her eyes back to Addie. She knew their nighttime job came with inevitable risks. Putting on the hood and heading outside to chase criminals was always a risk because you could never be sure you would make it. The bad guys could always have a surprise up their sleeves that the team wasn’t prepared for and that could eventually cost a life. Felicity and Oliver knew that.

When Felicity had learned that she was pregnant with their first child, she and Oliver had sat down to discuss their future on the team. Being responsible for a little human being had made them reconsider the risks they were taking every night. While Felicity had felt like it was still worth the risk since they were making the city safer after all, Oliver had been against it at first. It had taken a lot of convincing and years of balancing their work for the city with their family life until he had actually agreed that it had been the right choice. Especially because of his hesitation she hadn’t thought he’d take unnecessary risks now that they weren’t only responsible for one but five kids.

“Felicity, I am so sorry,” Oliver whispered. “I know it was stupid and I shouldn’t have done it and-“

“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have,” Felicity replied bitterly. She puckered her lips for a moment before she continued, “Like have you completely lost your mind? When you’ve been jealous of Bruce, I always thought it was just teasing and that you knew you didn’t have to prove anything to anyone.”

“I know that.”

“Then why the hell-“

When Addie started fuzzing, Felicity took in a deep breath. She knew it wasn’t a clever idea to raise her voice around the kids. It wasn’t a clever idea to raise her voice anyway. With a low sigh, Felicity closed her eyes and took some deep breaths. When she opened her eyes again, Oliver was still standing in the frame of the door.

“I know I shouldn’t have taken Bruce with me.”

“I am sure he gave you no chance,” Oliver replied. “I am sorry for letting his words get under my skin. I know I didn’t have to prove anything. I was just… I don’t… I’m really sorry, Felicity.”

Felicity sighed and patted the free spot on the couch next to her. Releasing a slow breath of relief, Oliver came over to her and sat down next to her. Felicity loosened an arm from around Addie, took his hand and wrapped it around her shoulders. With another sigh, she snuggled into his embrace and leaned her head against his shoulder. When he kissed the crown of her head, Felicity closed her eyes.

“I am really sorry,” he whispered.

“I know,” Felicity replied. She angled her head back and looked at him. “I know.”

Oliver nodded shortly before he rested his forehead against hers. Felicity closed her eyes and put her hand to his cheek, gently stroking her fingertips through his stubble. When Oliver brushed his lips against hers, Felicity responded to the kiss gently.

When their lips parted, Felicity leaned her head back a little more. She looked at Oliver intently.

“If you ever do something like that again and risk letting me alone with our five children, I kill you.”

Oliver nodded. “Okay.”

“I mean it.”

Again, he nodded. “Understood, accepted and agreed.”

“Say it,” Felicity insisted.

“I will never do something like that again. I promise.”

Felicity nodded with a short sigh. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied and brushed his lip against hers once more, sealing his promise to her with a kiss.


	250. Oliver's but

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * No that is no spelling mistake. It was not supposed to say "butt"!

Once she had directed the car into the garage and turned off the engine, Felicity shot a look at her watch. Ten-thirty.

“Damn it!”

She had left work at five already, so there would be enough time to play with the kids before they would have dinner together and she would put them in bed. Thanks to some complete closure of the arterial road into and out of downtown, she had been stuck in traffic for more than five hours. Now the kids would already be in bed. She hadn’t seen them all day since she had been forced to leave early this morning for some stupid video conference. She hated days that she didn’t see the kids or rather the kids didn’t see her since she’d definitely go to their rooms and kiss them goodnight now.

With a low groan, Felicity grabbed her purse from the passenger seat and hurried to the front door. She hadn’t even put a foot over the doorstep when Oliver already came from the kitchen, only dressed in sweatpants that were hanging low on his hips. Felicity’s mouth watered at the sight of him. Well, or maybe it was because of the fantastic smell of food coming from the kitchen. She wasn’t sure.

“Hey,” Oliver whispered, a sympathetic smile on his lips. “I am so sorry.”

Felicity chuckled exhaustedly, stepping out of her shoes and dropping her purse to the floor. She approached him, put her arms around his waist and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to capture his lips in a gentle kiss. Oliver’s hands cupped her cheeks in the meantime, stroking his thumbs over her cheeks as he responded to the kiss with all the love he had to give.

When their lips parted, Felicity rested her head back and smiled at him adoringly, saying, “It wasn’t your fault there has been a complete closure, right?”

Oliver chuckled. “No, it wasn’t.”

“I thought so,” Felicity replied, patting his chest, “unless you had discovered a love for destroying old water pipes and flooding the entire city. How do things like that even happen?”

“The mayor is overcharged,” Oliver replied, shrugging his shoulders. “Starling City has more problems than he can handle all at once and he might have put too much focus on trying to make homes affordable and forgot to keep an eye on other things. Speaking of homes, I think we accidentally scared our new neighbors away.”

“The Queenstons moved out?” Felicity asked, her eyes widening.

Oliver puckered his lips and nodded. “Yep. I think getting caught in the act and inviting their neighbors to a swinger party though they are not in an open marriage was just too much. I saw the moving van this afternoon and went over to talk to them. Marc said they decided it was better to start somewhere new.”

“But we have told them it wasn’t that bad,” Felicity said. “I mean it wasn’t that bad, was it? Things like that happen and we would have gotten over it. I am already over it.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I think it was too much embarrassment for a first month in a home where you are supposed to spend the rest of your life.”

Felicity sighed, nodding her head. Oliver was probably right. She doubted she had felt comfortable living here if people knew details about her marriage.

“They said repairing the damage at the street will take weeks,” she said eventually. “Traffic is going to be horror until they took care of that.”

Oliver nodded and rubbed his hands up and down her back. “Are you hungry?”

“Starving,” Felicity replied.

“I am already heating up the pasta.”

“Best husband ever,” Felicity told him. She pecked his lips shortly. “I’ll change into some more comfortable clothes and kiss our kids goodnight.”

Oliver pecked her lips once more and Felicity straightened back up onto her tiptoes to deepen the kiss for a moment. She stroked her tongue into his and scraped her teeth over his bottom lip before she broke the kiss. Oliver nuzzled her nose and brushed his lips against hers one last time. Only then Felicity stepped out of his embrace and headed upstairs.

She tiptoed into Emmy’s room, smiling at the way her oldest daughter was lying in bed upside down, her arms spread apart like she was hugging the mattress. Felicity stroked a few strands of her daughter’s hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. Emmy only released a tired sigh and moved her head forward, causing the blonde curls to fall back into her face.

Felicity went into Tommy’s room next. He was snuggled under his blanket despite the heat in the room. He held Emmy’s pink giraffe that she borrowed him often in his arm. Felicity sat down on the edge of his bed and stroked her fingers through his short dark hair fore a moment. When she kissed his temple, he stirred.

“Mommy?” he whispered, still asleep.

“Yes, mommy’s home,” she whispered and kissed his temple once more, “Sleep tight, Buddy.”

Tommy just released another deep sigh, snuggling closer to the giraffe in his arms. Felicity watched him for another moment before she opened the window to let in some cool night air and left his room.

Felicity stepped into Millie’s nursery and couldn’t keep herself from chuckling when, immediately, Millie got up on her feet and smiled, calling out, “Mama!”

“Have you been awake the entire time, Baby?” Felicity asked her, lifting her out of her crib and kissing her cheek. “And you didn’t tell daddy to come upstairs?”

Millie smiled, snuggling her face to Felicity’s shoulder. She stroked her fingers through her daughter’s dark hair and sat down in the rocking chair, Millie on her lap. The little girl was almost seventeen months old which was crazy because times had just flown by these last two years it seemed. She kissed Millie’s lips and cradled her in her arms like she wanted to sing her to sleep. Millie giggled.

“Did you have a great day?”

“Yes,” Millie replied.

“That’s great.”

Felicity smiled. Millie had always been the easiest of the children, the one who was always content and never demanded much. Felicity had always joked that Millie was her reward for putting up with Emmy and Tommy, who had been the complete opposite of their younger sister. Millie had been exactly what Felicity and Oliver had needed with the surprise of Addie, though.

She had often wondered if Millie had gone short because of that. She hadn’t had the bonus of being the baby and nestling for long since Felicity had been pregnant again so soon after her birth. Then she had never demanded the attention her older siblings had gotten at her age since she had always been the uncomplicated one.

“Mama. Sleep,” Millie said after a while. She sighed and snuggled more into Felicity’s embrace before she repeated it once more. “Mama. Sleep.”

“You want to sleep, Baby?” Felicity asked.

“Millie sleep,” Millie agreed.

“Okay, I am putting you back in your crib, okay?” Felicity suggested and already got up from the rocking chair. She kissed Millie’s temple and the little girl had fallen asleep before she had put her back into the crib. Felicity smiled at her, stroking her fingers over her stomach soothingly. “Sleep tight, Baby.”

From Millie’s nursery, Felicity went over to Addie’s. Unlike her older sister, the five-month-old was fast asleep. Felicity put her hand to her baby’s chest and felt her fast heartbeat under her hand. With how well Addie had caught up on other baby’s her age, sometimes it was hard to believe how much she had struggled when she had just been born. In quiet moment like this, when it was just Addie and her, Felicity remembered the fear of losing her daughter quite vividly, though.

“Sweet dreams, Sweetie-Pie,” Felicity whispered and kissed Addie’s temple before leaving her baby.

She went over to her bedroom, sighing at the sight of the wide, comfortable bed. It was tempting to just let herself fall into it and sleep. She knew she’d be awake in an hour or two and be even hungrier, though. That was why she pushed away her tiredness and went over to the bathroom. She dropped her clothes to the floor carelessly, washed her face and changed into something comfier.

Downstairs in the living room, Oliver was already waiting for her with a plate of wonderful Pasta Spinaci and glass of homemade ice tea. Sitting down between his spread legs on the couch and snuggling her back to his chest, she let him hand her the food and started eating.

“You are spoiling me, you know that?” Felicity asked, pushing another fork with the wonderful pasta into her mouth.

Oliver smiled. “I can’t help myself. I love spoiling you.”

“Well, I love being spoilt, so we are the perfect match.”

“I hope you found that out before today already.”

Felicity chuckled. “Since you have always spoilt me, you can bet your ass I knew before.”

“I am sure my ass is already yours and I can’t bet it anymore.”

Again, Felicity chuckled. “That’s actually true.”

They chatted some more while Felicity was eating dinner. Evenings like this, when they would just enjoy some proper time as a couple and chat lightly about nothing too serious, was something she really loved. Their life was serious enough. It never hurt letting go of all the pain and damage in the world and just pretend there was only the two of them.

Felicity had just eaten the last of her dinner when Oliver dipped his head forward and whispered into her ear, “We are getting a visitor.”

Only a moment later, Tommy came running in. “Mommy!”

“Hi, Buddy,” Felicity said, wrapping his arms around him as he climbed on her lap. “Why aren’t you asleep?”

“I’m not tired,” he simply replied. “Can we play a game?”

Oliver chuckled, tapping the tip of Tommy’s nose with his fingertip. “Mommy can play the Tommy-goes-back-to-bed-game with you.”

Tommy laughed. “Daddy, no!”

“Tommy, yes,” Oliver and Felicity both replied.

For a moment, Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder. He kissed her forehead in response. They watched Tommy as he snuggled back closer to Felicity. He pulled the pink giraffe closer to his chest and sighed. His eyes were fluttering shut soon, his breathing evening out.

“I will get him back to bed,” Felicity suggested with a sigh.

Oliver nodded. He kissed her temple, stroked his hand over Tommy’s hair and kissed the crown of his head. Leaning his cheek against his son’s head he whispered, “Sleep tight, Buddy.”

Adjusting Tommy’s position on her arms, Felicity got up from the couch and carried Tommy upstairs. She lay him down in bed and tugged him under the blanket, knowing he liked it safe and warm even in the middle of summer. She kissed his forehead once more and was about to get up when he clenched his hand to a fist in the fabric of her shirt. Smiling, Felicity lay down in bed with him for a moment.

She was tempted to just fall asleep here now. She had had dinner, so she wouldn’t wake up from hunger in a few hours. It was probably better to sleep in her own bed though since Tommy’s bed wasn’t really wide enough for an adult and a kid to sleep in together for long. That was why Felicity kept her head propped up onto her hand, stroking her fingers over his hair and back, until his hand slowly loosened around her shirt. She didn’t know how much time had passed since she had taken him upstairs and it didn’t really matter. She just kissed Tommy’s temple once more and crawled out of bed.

As she closed the door behind her with a sigh, Felicity smiled quietly. Sometimes, she had no idea how she and Oliver handled all their duties. Five kids, a company with thousands of employees and the responsibility for the safety of this city were a lot. Yet, somehow, they always managed to balance theses things. There were times it was harder and times it was easier. Felicity was almost a hundred percent sure that the support of their family and friends and even more so the love and support they offered each other was the main reason for that. Sometimes it really felt like together they could achieve everything they wanted.

Smiling at that thought, Felicity went back downstairs. When she stepped into the living room and saw the brooding expression on Oliver’s face, she frowned. It had been a while since she had seen that expression on him the last time, she figured. She went over to him slowly and loosely put her arms around his throat from behind. Her lips found his temple while Oliver was lifting his fingers to gently stroked over her tender skin.

“Wouldn’t Tommy fall back asleep?” Oliver asked.

“He didn’t want to let go,” Felicity replied, “so I stayed with him for a little bit.”

Oliver just hummed in response, leaning his head back. He captured her lips in a short kiss. When they broke the kiss, Felicity moved her fingertips over the frown on his forehead, smoothing the wrinkles out until Oliver chuckled.

“What are you doing?”

“I make you stop brooding,” Felicity told him. She kissed his cheek and climbed over the backrest of the couch into Oliver’s lap. “Did I leave you alone for too long that you had time to start brooding?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied, pulling her closer. “How dare you?”

Felicity chuckled and kissed him gently. Her fingers moved into his hair, angling his head back to deepen the kiss. Oliver’s fingers stayed on her hips, holding her close. Though he was responding to the kiss, Felicity could feel that he wasn’t completely in it. He seemed absentminded, responding to the kiss without initiating more or even anything different. Brushing her lips against his one last time, she pulled back.

Her fingers stayed on his face, stroking over the stubble on his cheeks the way she knew he liked so much. She scrutinized him, trying to find out what was going on by just looking at him. Their connection was so strong that sometimes she could read in his eyes what as bothering him. Oliver had never been one to talk much. He had become a lot more open to talking, telling her when something bothered him even if he didn’t always know how to tell her what he was feeling. Somewhere along the way, Felicity had learned reading his body posture and facial expressions instead.

When that didn’t seem to work today, she whispered, “Talk to me.”

“Do you have any idea how much I love you?”

Felicity was taken aback by the question. Yet, she smiled. “Of course, I do. If it’s just half as much as I love you, then it’s still a lot.”

“I love you so much,” Oliver continued. He kissed the soft spot under her ear, sucking at it gently before letting go. “Being with you, having this family with you, it all gives me a real sense of peace. I have never been more content in my entire life. Before the island, I was restless, chasing pleasures and fun. On the island and in Hongkong and Russia I was fighting for my life. Coming back, I was restless to follow my father’s request. Then you stepped into my life and so many things changed. Then the kids came and even more things changed, everything for the better of course. I am content now. I can sleep. I don’t need to chase after criminals or anything even more because I already have all I need. For the rest of my life, I could do nothing more, but be here for you and our kids – cook for you, spend time with you and support you in everything you are doing.”

“That sounds like a but,” Felicity replied. She grinned, cocking her head. “But the Queenstons’ idea of an open marriage and swinging is just so tempting that you can’t resist and you need to have that too now.”

Oliver chuckled. “Yeah, no. We both know I have a very particular type. I doubt I would find someone who meets my criterions, so…”

“Really?” Felicity asked. “Tell me more.”

“Hm… She should be small with a beautiful body. She should have full lips and blue eyes. She should wear glasses. Her dyed blonde hair should be often tied into a high ponytail and turn to cute little curls when she doesn’t straighten it after a shower,” Oliver explained with a smile. “She should be into IT. She should have graduated from MIT in 2009 when she was only nineteen and she should lead her own company now. That’s very important to me. She should be smart, good-hearted, funny and just wonderful in everything she does. She should have an undying love for unhealthy food and a slight reluctance regarding any sports that doesn’t include two sweating bodies moving together on a mattress or against a wall or wherever else she feels like it. It would also be cool if she did a cringy thing with her eyebrow when she is thinking too much and bite down on her bottom lip when she is excited or turned on. When she feels embarrassed, which happens often because sometimes she babbles and doesn’t realize what she is saying until she said it, she blushes. The blush spreads from her cheeks over her neck to her chest and it’s one of the most beautiful things to watch. Oh, and, of course should be the mother of at least four of my children. A woman who even fails one of these criterions won’t even be looked at.”

Felicity smiled and cocked her head. “The mother of at least four of your children? Do you already have tabs on someone who wants to give you more than four children?”

Oliver chuckled. “I am just keeping my mind open in case life hands us some more surprises. I don’t want to be deadlocked on one specific type. Just in case… you know…”

“Hon, if you knock me up again which really shouldn’t happen since Little Oliver is supposed to only shoot with rubber bullets from now on, you won’t need any type anymore because I will hurt you so much that you will be scared of women and run around in the city killing people because of it.”

“Sounds like me ten years ago.”

Felicity took in a breath, already about to correct her words when Oliver gently pushed her off his lap. With a sigh, he got up and started pacing up and down in the living room. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, watching him for a moment.

“I’m sorry,” she said eventually. “That was not what I meant and-“

“I know that,” Oliver told her. He stopped pacing, putting his hands to his hips and looked at her for a moment. With a sigh, he approached the couch, sat down on the backrest and took Felicity’s hands into his. He lifted her hands to his lips and kissed them, first the right and then the left. “I know that.”

Felicity nodded slowly, but narrowed her eyes at him a little. “Does this have anything to do with the brooding expression on your face when I came back downstairs?”

Oliver nodded. “It does.”

“So, tell me,” Felicity prompted him gently, stroking her thumb over the knuckles of his hand. “What’s you but?”

“I watched the local news show while you have been upstairs with Tommy.”

Felicity nodded slowly, perking up her eyebrows. “And?”

“Rogers lays down his office.”

Felicity frowned. “Why? He always seemed to get along as the mayor. I mean he survived three years in the position which is a lot for Starling City standards. The water pipe wasn’t his fault. Things like that happen and-“

“He was told it would happen and told to remediate pipes and canals in the city, but the city is struggling in so many ways that Rogers preferred other projects.”

“So, it is his fault?” Felicity asked.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “It’s probably arguable. Fact is he was told what could have happened and he did nothing to prevent it. According to his publicist, maybe Starling’s condition isn’t as good as Rogers made it out to be.”

“Which means?”

“Serious deficit in the field of urban planning,” Oliver started. “Problems with educational establishments, childcare offers and playgrounds. Pollution of the bay that is barely to get under control. There have been mischiefs in all areas of local politics and, apparently, that lawless madmen with partly archaic weapons and dressed in leather dedicated themselves to take care of the criminals in the city is not seen as positively by everyone as Rogers tried to make it believe.”

The last words were said with so much bitterness that Felicity could feel Oliver’s anger and pain in her chest. She knew he was giving so much of himself for their mission to help this city. He didn’t need anyone to thank him, but being hated for what he did still burdened him sometimes, especially because he knew how hard it was on Emmy and Tommy. They knew who their dad was and hearing other kids repeating their parents’ words about the Arrow and his companions being criminals was hard for them to swallow. Emmy could be quite feisty when she felt she had to protect her daddy.

“This is the city where my entire family is living,” Oliver continued. “My parents have been living here. My sister and I have been born here. Our kids have been born here, and so will Thea’s kids. We are all living here. I want the city my family lives in to be a good and safe place, though.”

“Of course you do.” Felicity nodded and bit down on her bottom lip, cocking her head slightly. “Do you want to move away from here?”

“No,” Oliver replied quickly, shaking his head.

“We could do so if you needed it,” Felicity told him honestly. “It would be hard to move away from here, from our home and our friends. It would take a lot of planning to make it work, especially with the kids and QI. If you need that to be happier or to come to rest, we will certainly find a way, though.”

“You’d really move away from here?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, shooting him a smile. “I’d go anywhere with you. I mean I would prefer moving to Bali if we had to move away, but, yeah, I’d go with you to other places too.”

Oliver stroked the knuckles of his hands against her cheek gently, touching her bottom lip with his thumb. He was looking at her intently. “Do you really think we could do that? Leave everything behind and start somewhere new?”

“It would be hard,” Felicity whispered, nodding to herself. “Starling has been my home for so long now, my first and only real home actually. I love it here for so many more reasons than I can tell. I think it’s important we are feeling really at home in our home. When Starling doesn’t give you this feeling anymore, then maybe we have to try find it somewhere. I think together we can do everything, so I guess finding a new home in a different is definitely in our possibilities.”

“It would be hard,” Oliver repeated her words.

“Incredibly hard.” Felicity nodded. “Unless it’s Bali because moving to Bali would be so easy.”

Oliver chuckled. “I am going to remember that in case I ever think we should move away from here. Maybe when we are a hundred years old and want to enjoy the last of our days, that would be the right place for us.”

“But not yet?”

“Not yet,” Oliver replied. He leaned down and kissed her lips. “I love this city and I know how much you love this city. “We can’t give up on it just yet, can we?”

“No, we can’t,” Felicity replied and squeezed his hands. “So, what do you suggest?”

Oliver hesitated for a moment. He lowered his gaze to their linked fingers for a moment. Felicity didn’t speak. She waited patiently for him to speak, giving him the time he needed to say what he wanted to say.

“Did you mean what you said before?” Oliver asked, eventually lifting his gaze again and locking eyes with her. “That together we can do everything?”

Felicity smiled. “With all of my heart.”

Oliver smiled at her for a long moment. He took in her face, looking for any doubt. Felicity held his gaze, making him know that she didn’t have any doubts because she didn’t have any. She had meant what she had said. She trusted her gut as much as she trusted their marriage.

“Felicity?”

She perked up her eyebrows and smiled, making him know that she was listening. Her thumbs stroked over the knuckles of his hands, assuring him that he had his full support no matter what he would say. Oliver lifted his gaze, looking at her without speaking for a long moment.

“I’m going to run for mayor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, my Lovelies!
> 
> Since this was the 250th chapter, I wanted to take the time and thank all of you for still sticking with this story. I couldn’t be more amazed by the response this fic still receives. 250 chapters and some of you still want more. I can’t even put into words how I feel about that. It makes me so happy.
> 
> The past months have been hard on me with the thesis and the oral exam and some other things. I am very grateful you all understood that I couldn’t write that much during that time and never urged. The fact you still participated in the surverys I did to maintain the little excitement I had about writing made me very, very happy. 
> 
> I will have to go back to university by tomorrow, so four chapters a week will probably be an exception, but I hope I will get to post at least two each week. Three chapters for the next week are already safe. ;)
> 
> I figured I should say a few words about the upcoming chapters. With Oliver’s idea, the focus will shift a little. That doesn’t mean that this story will be political. It just means that we will see Oliver taking this way and explore how he and his family are getting along with it. It also allows to introduct the angst storyline that will come. That being said, there will be some themes that will be addressed a couple of times - Oliver’s candidacy, Thea’s pregnancy, XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX - but I think the one-shot-like character will still be maintained I think.
> 
> There were a couple of reasons to introduce this storyline:  
> a) more gifs available  
> b) addition of a role-reveral with Felicity supporting Oliver’s carreer  
> c) new storylines & adventures.
> 
> We will see how it goes I guess. Let’s see where the next 50 chapters take us. If we get through them, I actually have another angst storyline in mind that would toally shake up dynamics and everything. It would be so much fun (at least for me)! Anyway, let’s focus on the next fifty chapters first.
> 
> If you have prompts, ideas, headcanons, always feel free to share them with me. I will do my best to make them happen. A lot of the ideas you submitted in the surverys have already been added to the story.
> 
> Once again, thank you for all of your support. I hope I will be able to excite you for the next fifty chapters too. :)
> 
> xoxo Kathi
> 
> PS: Teaser for the next chapter (a really easy one) - Oliver and Felicity discuss Oliver’s idea of XXXXXXX XXX XXXXX.


	251. I walk beside you

With a sigh, Felicity closed the door to Addie’s nursery behind her and strolled to her own bedroom. Pulling the blankets from the bed since it was just too warm to cover herself given the heat in the room, she shot a brief look at her watch and groaned. It was almost two in the morning already which meant she had only four hours of sleep before her alarm would go off.

Felicity puckered her lips for a moment. She opened the door to the balcony to let in some cool night air and went back to the bed then. Lying down on her side, she grabbed her phone from the nightstand and sent a short mail to her assistant Emily to make her know that she wouldn’t be in the office until noon. After that terribly long way back home, Felicity felt she deserved a morning off to spend with her family.

Resting her head back against the pillows, Felicity looked at the ceiling for a moment. Her eyes were burning from tiredness, but she didn’t want to sleep before Oliver crawled into bed with her. When a quiet noise came from the baby monitor, Felicity turned her head to see Millie stretching out her arms over her head before she turned onto her side with a sigh and continued sleeping. On the second monitor, Addie was still fast asleep.

Felicity was still watching her two youngest kids when Oliver switched off the light in the bathroom and stepped into the bedroom. He smiled quietly as he approached the bed. Not saying a word, he crawled onto the mattress to Felicity’s side. He gently nudged her legs apart with his knee, so he could lie down between her spread legs. His chest pressed to hers when he lowered his body onto his forearms.

Felicity stroked her hands up and down his back gently, her fingertips following the outlines of his scars that she had memorized in all details by now. Over the years the had been together, more and more had joint the once he had brought back from his five years away. Felicity knew each one of the scars and each story behind them.

For a long moment, they just looked at each other. Oliver was scrutinizing her face, his fingers playing with her hair. Her heart started quickening, beating fast but steadily against her ribs. Oliver smiled at that and lowered his lips onto hers, kissing her gently. His tongue swiped over her bottom lip briefly before Oliver broke the kiss.

His fingers were still combing through her hair gently when he said, “You still haven’t said anything.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows and grinned. “Hi, Husband. Nice to see you again.”

Oliver rolled his eyes with a chuckle and pecked her lips before he specified, “About what I told you before.”

“Oh.” She had known that he had meant his announcement that he wanted to run for mayor. She just hadn’t thought about what exactly she was going to say about that yet or actually she had thought about it, but she hadn’t come to a decision yet. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, feeling tempted to avoid Oliver’s eyes to give her a moment and think about what to say. The way Oliver looked at her intently, stopped her from doing so, though. Clearing her throat, she asked, “I didn’t?”

“You didn’t,” Oliver told her, shaking his head slightly. “After I told you, Millie started crying, so I went upstairs and took care of her and when she was asleep, you were taking care of Addie. Now here we are and I would like to hear what you are thinking.”

“What exactly did you tell me before again?”

Felicity regretted her stupid delaying tactic when Oliver pressed his lips together and eventually lowered his eyes. He didn’t have to say anything for Felicity to see that he was disappointed. The expression on his face was enough for her to see it. Detecting that she had probably caught up on his reaction, Oliver quickly looked at her again with a forced smile.

“It’s fine,” he told her and kissed her cheek. “It was just an idea anyway.”

When he tried rolling off her, Felicity quickly wrapped her legs around his waist and framed his face with her hands. Her thumbs stroked through his stubble gently while she was taking in his face closely. Oliver released a low sigh, snuggling his face into her hands.

“Tell me why you want to do this,” Felicity whispered eventually, still holding his face between her hands. Her thumbs stroked over the corners of his mouth and his bottom lip until Oliver puckered his lips and kissed her thumbs, making Felicity smile. “Why do you want to be mayor?”

“I told you why,” Oliver replied. “I want this city to be our home because I love this city and I know how much you and our kids love this city. I need Starling to be better than this if I am supposed to be comfortable calling this city our home. I need Starling to be the safest and the best it can be. I know we are privileged enough not to be personally affected by all the mischiefs easily, but that shouldn’t be an excuse. This is still supposed to be our home and the people living here are more or less part of our lives, so I don’t like to think that they are suffering while we are living in contentment just because we are rolling in money and they aren’t. Everyone should live with a minimum of contentment. If Rogers is right about Starling’s severe condition, then there is a lot of room for improvement.”

“And you think you are the right person to fill that room?” Felicity asked. Even before Oliver frowned, she lifted her hands in front of herself and shook her head. “No, wait that came out terribly wrong. That sounded like I didn’t think you were the right person which is obviously bullshit – Oh my god, I feels so good to finally say a curse word again – because you’d be the best that could happen to this city. I mean, let’s be honest, you already are the best damn thing that could have happened to this city, even if they don’t know that and don’t even see your alter ego as the savior he is. Anyway, you’d be the best mayor possible. Apart from being the perfect person to print on election posters and be the face of this city, like you’d probably be Mayor McDreamy or Mayor McSexy or something like that-“

“Oh, thank God,” Oliver interrupted her with a chuckle. He lowered his head and peppered a dozen little kisses all over her face. “Thank God. Thank God. Thank God.”

Felicity tried to frown in confusion, but the way Oliver’s lips and stubble tickled her just made her burst out into laughter. She let go of Oliver’s face and put her arms back around him. Her short fingernails scratched over the burn scar on his lower back like he knew Oliver liked so much. When Oliver’s lips met hers in a gentle kiss, they both hummed.

“What was that about?” Felicity asked with a frown when their lips parted and their eyes locked.

“You were so quiet since I told you about my idea,” Oliver replied, stroking his hands over her hair. “I thought I had ambushed you with it so much that it had left you speechless.”

“You know me. I am never speechless for long.”

“Luckily.”

They smiled at each other for a long moment before their lips met in another gentle kiss. Felicity sighed, stroking her tongue against Oliver’s and moving a hand into his hair to pull at some strands of his hair. Oliver growled in response, his hand finding her outer thigh and massaging it with firm pressure. Felicity felt tempted to arch her back and press more against him, but she knew no was not the time to get lost in pleasure.

When their lips parted, Oliver sighed. He kissed the corner of her mouth, the edge of her jaw and the side of her neck gently, sliding a little further down the bed, so he could rest his head on her chest. His arms pushed under her body to hold her even closer to him. Felicity smiled, stroking her hands over his hair.

“You do know that in most marriages it is probably the other way around and the husband lets his wife use them as a pillow, right?”

“What do you know about most marriages?”

“Well, I watch a lot of TV. I love reading,” Felicity told him, shrugging her shoulders. “Most of the time the couples are either spooning with the girl being the little spoon or he is lying on his back with her head resting on his chest.”

“You would want that?”

“Are you kidding?” Felicity asked. “How would I be supposed to sleep with your rock-hard body under me? I’d rather sleep on the floor. And basically, the only time spooning is acceptable is when I am pregnant.”

“Good because it’s ridiculous,” Oliver replied, pressing his nose against her chest. “How do these guys keep their girls from leaving?”

Felicity snorted. “You think I would sneak out of bed and run away in the middle of the night?”

“No,” Oliver replied, “mainly because we know I am fast than you.”

Felicity chuckled. “Good thing we can agree on this.”

“Luckily, exceptions confirm the rule, right?”

Felicity smiled and lifted her head from the pillow to kiss the crown of Oliver’s head. “Right.”

They lay in silence for a while. Neither of them talked. They just enjoyed the quiet moment. Between Felicity’s fulltime job, their nightly hobby and five kids, sometimes there was little to no time to spend as a couple. Despite all their responsibilities, somehow, they managed to never go short for very long.

Even before Oliver had told her about his idea of taking care of this city in a new way, Felicity had thought to herself that it seemed like they could manage so much if they just tried. They were handling so much already. What was one more challenge?

Of course, in the back of her mind Felicity knew that it was a lot easier said than done. When she had been pregnant with Addie and the depression had made it hard for her to even get through the easiest and least exhausting of days, they had needed help. They hadn’t been able to handle it on their own. Felicity had no idea how they had gotten through it if it hadn’t been for Laurel, who had helped Felicity here at home, and Curtis, who had finally replaced Felicity at QI, so Oliver could be here for her.

Calling in their friends to help them had worked for the couple of months that they had needed help, but it wasn’t a long-term solution. Their friends all had their own lives, so Oliver and Felicity couldn’t constantly ask them to take the kids for them. With Laurel finally being in a relationship again and Thea and Roy having their first baby late in November, they probably didn’t have that much time to babysit anymore anyway, never mind casually being planned into Oliver’s and Felicity everyday-schedule.

“I’d suggest switching off the light and sleep given the time,” Oliver whispered eventually, “but I can hear you thinking.”

Felicity hummed for a moment. “So, you want to run for mayor?”

Oliver tensed for a moment. Felicity continued stroking her hand over his hair, though. She gave him the time he needed before he sighed and relaxed again. His body melted against hers and he turned his head to press a soft kiss to the top of her left breast.

“It was just an idea, you know?” he replied, snuggling his cheek to her chest once more. “When I watched Rogers’ interview, I just realized that this city needs change. It needs someone who really cares about it and most importantly about the people that are living here. I know I haven’t thought this through yet. It’s not a decision to make easily because we have other responsibilities that we need to juggle around with as it is, so-“

Felicity shook her head quickly. “That doesn’t matter right now. When you really want to do this, then we will find a way to make it work. I just need to know if you really want this.”

Oliver propped himself up onto his forearms, making Felicity’s hands slip from his head to his shoulders. Slowly, she lowered her hands down his upper arms and rested them against his elbows. She bit down on her bottom lip, watching the frown on Oliver’s forehead deepen.

“Why are you so hesitant to believe me?” Oliver asked and swiped his thumb over her bottom lip to free it from the maltreatment of her front teeth. “Do I need to put on a shirt to gain some credibility?”

Felicity smiled halfheartedly. “No, it’s not that.”

“Thank God. It’s too hot to wear a shirt,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

Felicity stroked her hand up and down the back of Oliver’s upper arms, watching his face for a moment. She could see in his face that he was genuinely interested in her opinion. Felicity wasn’t exactly surprised by it. She knew her opinion meant a lot to Oliver, just like his opinion meant a lot to her.

“Is it because this came out of nowhere?” Oliver asked eventually. “Like I said, I haven’t thought the details through. There are-“

“It’s really not that, Oliver,” Felicity promised him. “I am just surprised. A few years ago, you were running for mayor too and that time I also thought it was what you wanted when really it was just what I wanted.”

“Oh, to your defense, Thea wanted it too,” Oliver reminded her.

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him slightly as she frowned. Oliver seemed to be able to joke about that now, but for Felicity it was still too serious. She had to admit that her memory was a little clouded. She remembered the evening she and Thea had joked about Oliver being a good mayor and how, somehow, the plan of Oliver actually running for mayor had grown from that. They had talked to Oliver and convinced him of their plan. He had agreed and the things had gotten started. Somewhere along these things, Felicity must have missed that she and Thea hadn’t talked to him or convinced him but actually urged him to agree to that. Only after Tommy had been born and they had spent weeks with his candidacy, Felicity had realized that Oliver hadn’t wanted any of that.

Technically, she had still realized it in time. Oliver hadn’t been voted mayor yet. For Felicity, she still felt like that had been her worst misstep in their marriage, though. Her own wishes and ideas had blinded her for what Oliver had wanted. He had never really told her that he hadn’t wanted it, but she knew it had only been because Oliver had counted on Felicity realizing it. It had been the same when Oliver had traveled to Central City to visit William every other weekend, taking Tommy and Emmy with him and leaving Felicity alone. She had counted on him realizing that she hadn’t been as okay with it as she had made it out to be either. They usually knew each other better than that and saw these things. When Oliver’s biggest failure had been accusing her of cheating while she had supported him and their kids getting to know William without her, hers had been pushing him to do something he hadn’t really wanted just because she had wanted it. Felicity had felt like a tyrant for weeks, no matter how many times Oliver had told her that if there was a tyrant in their family, it was Emmy. She had sworn herself never to let that happen again.

“This time I really want this, Felicity,” Oliver said seriously. “I am not only doing it for you. Saying I am not doing it for you at all would be a lie. I love you and almost everything I do, I am also doing for you. That doesn’t mean that I am doing it against my will. Most of the times, your will and mine are just the same. You and our family are not the only reason I want to do this, though. I want to do this for me too. I think four years ago, I was still struggling too much with finding balance between being the Arrow and being a family man. I felt like doing both was almost impossible and faced with that decision I always put our family first. These last years while I got to be home with the children, I think I found that balance and I think I am ready to take it a step further and try being there for the city more than I was ready to before.”

Felicity smiled. Here it was again, the moment that Oliver surprised her or she surprised herself with realizing she could love him a little bit more than she had already.

“Do you think I can do that?”

Felicity’s smile widened. “I thought you could do it four years ago already, so of course I do. You are going to be the best mayor this city can have.”

With her hands in his hair, Felicity pulled Oliver’s head down to her. She captured his lips in a gentle kiss. When their lips pulled apart, she nuzzled his nose. Oliver propped himself back up onto his forearms and looked at her.

“So, you are in?” he asked. “You are supporting this?”

“Oliver, I promise to always be your best friend, your companion and your lover, the person you can lean on and trust in. I promise to be your partner in parenthood and your ally in whatever conflict you will have to face. I promise to be your greatest supporter and yet your toughest challenger. I promise to enjoy adventure with you as much the quiet moments. I promise to stand by you when you’re content as well as when you’re disappointed. I promise to support the best of your ideas as well as your mischief. I promise to tell you when I am mad at you and yet give my best to forgive you. This is my sacred vow to you, my equal and partner in all parts of life,” Felicity said with a content smile on her lips. She cocked her head. “Remember?”

“Your vow to me for our last wedding,” Oliver said, tears welling in his eyes. “How could I forget?”

“I meant what I said there about being your supporter,” Felicity replied. “I also meant what I said earlier today that together we can do almost everything. Whether or not you are sure you want to do this, as long as you just want to try, I will be beside you every step of the way.”

“You are the best. Thank you,” Oliver whispered and pecked her lips. “I know this won’t be easy, especially with the kids and-“

“Don’t worry,” Felicity interrupted him. “Our kids have two – in William’s case even three – parents that love them. That is all that matters. Everything else we will work out.”

“How?” Oliver asked. “We always split the tasks. One of us works and the other takes care of the kids. This is-“

“-going to be hard work,” Felicity interrupted him. “I have a great team at QI, though. I can work more from home and delegate some tasks until you got used to it and then we make a new plan.”

“It’s going to be hard not spending that much time with the kids anymore,” Oliver whispered, resting his chest back on Felicity’s chest. “I want to do more for the city. My parents are partly responsible for the current condition of Starling and I want to right that, not for them but for us and our kids. I think we are more than privileged with the life we have, so I want to use these privileges to help the less privileged if that makes sense.”

“It does make sense to me,” Felicity whispered, stroking her hands over his back. “You will be doing great.”

“I am just worried that at the end it will be too much. We have a family and five kids that count on us. Our jobs are not really just work from nine to five,” Oliver said and sighed. “I am worried they get thrown under the bus if I do this. When I worked at QC it was easy because I never really loved that job. I did it because it had to be done, but I wasn’t as excited about it as you are now. If I do something I really love, maybe I get sucked up into it. After the island, I focused on being the Hood and the Arrow full-heartedly. Then with the kids, I actually focused on that completely. Getting used to doing both was hard. What if with this third thing, I will get lost in that? I am ready to try it, but I am worried.”

“We will take care, so that won’t happen. I think William, Emmy and Tommy are old enough to understand why we need to work anyway and your reasons are very honorable. We will figure out how we will balance all of this. I am sure of it,” Felicity whispered and kissed the crown of Oliver’s head. “Just not at three in the morning. I won’t have any good ideas until I slept at least ten hours.”

Oliver chuckled and pressed a kiss to the top of her breast. “So, let’s sleep.”

“Let’s sleep,” Felicity agreed, stroking her hand over his hair, “and tomorrow we talk about how to make this work.”

“Thanks for your support,” Oliver whispered. “I couldn’t do this without you.”

“I couldn’t manage QI and have five kids without a guilty conscience either if it wasn’t for your support,” Felicity whispered. “I am just giving back what you gave me these last years.”

“I love you.”

Felicity smiled and tightened her arms around Oliver. “I love you too.”


	252. House of love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys!  
> Before you read the chapter, I wanted to thank you for your support of the storyline that has been foreshadowed in the 250th chapter. I was very pleasantly surprised by it. :)

“Oliver.”

When Felicity’s quiet whisper of his name woke him, Oliver tightened his arms around her naked body beneath his. With a low grumble, he turned his head to press his nose to her chest and breathe in the sweet scent of her skin. Felicity’s right hand moved into his hair, massaging his scalp, while her left hand scratched his back the way he liked so much. Oliver kissed the top of her breast in silent gratitude. If there was a good way to wake up, it was definitely this, snuggled up into the warmth of her body.

“You are tired,” Felicity whispered and Oliver could hear the smile in her voice. “You’re not often this tired, especially not after you slept. Did I tire you out last night?”

Oliver smiled, thinking back to the night before. After their five kids had been in bed, he and Felicity had lain down too. They had snuggled up to one another and talked about their plan about telling the kids about his candidature today. After one week of thinking it through thoroughly, he had decided that he was going to give it a try. The few doubts he still had would fade away eventually. Anyway, after some talking, they had started smooching a little until one thing had led to another and they had ended up making sweet love for hours.

He snuck out an arm from under her body and put his hand to her ribcage, spreading his fingers there and stroking her soft skin. He rubbed his cheek against the top of her breast. His lips brushed against the red skin where the beard-burn was showing before he rested his chin there to look at Felicity’s face. She looked content, the quiet smile on her lips making her even more beautiful than she was without even trying.

“Last night was amazing,” he replied eventually. “Thank you for that.”

“You do not have to thank me, at least not for that,” Felicity told him and grinned. “It was my pleasure. Literally.”

“It was three times your pleasure,” Oliver specified.

Felicity chuckled. “Thank you for counting.”

“You don’t have to thank me, at least not for that,” he repeated her words from before. When Felicity rolled her eyes and shook her head, releasing another chuckle, Oliver moved up the bed a little and kissed her chastely. When their lips parted, Oliver nuzzled her nose. “I heard people should start their days like the last one ended.”

“I think that’s a bad advice given for hangovers,” Felicity replied with slightly narrowed eyes. “And while I would love to say yes I think our kids would either starve to death or come in here to force us to make breakfast and we don’t want another child to catch us in the act, right?”

“Maybe we would end up like the Queenstons, pack our things and run away from here.”

Felicity chuckled. “Unfortunately, we couldn’t run away from our embarrassment since we can’t very well run away from our kids.”

Oliver sighed. “You have to stop being logical about sex, my dear.”

“Poor Baby,” Felicity replied, playfully patting the top of his head. “No morning sex for you. What a crappy start into your day.”

Oliver was about to reply when a low cry came from the baby monitor on the nightstand. They both turned their heads to see Millie standing on the mattress in her bed, her hands holding onto the grid tightly.

“Mama!” she called out.

“Isn’t she the sweetest?” Felicity asked. “She has probably been awake for a while already. Yet, she waited until we were awake to call for us.”

“As much as I love that theory, how would she have known we are awake?” Oliver asked amusedly. “She doesn’t have a parent monitor. Luckily, because it airs a lot of porn.”

Felicity chuckled and pecked his lips once more. “It does.”

She pushed at his shoulder until Oliver rolled off her with a sigh. While he was making himself comfortable on his mostly unused side of the bed, he watched Felicity putting on some panties, her sweatpants and one of his hoodies. He smiled. He loved watching Felicity getting dressed or undressed. He loved watching her no matter what she did and he loved it even more when she complained about it like she was really bothered by it. There were no complains today, though.

When another cry came from the baby monitor, now a much more dissatisfied cry, Oliver turned his head to see Addie squirming in her bed.

“You should get dressed,” Felicity suggested and threw him a shirt as well as boxer briefs and sweatpants, “because I will ask Millie to go cuddling with you while I take care of Addie.”

Oliver groaned, making Felicity chuckle as she left. Quickly getting into the clothes, he watched Millie’s monitor. Felicity lifted her from her crib and kissed her cheek before she whispered something into her ear and put her back to the floor. Only seven seconds later, the door was pushed open further and Millie came running in.

“Morning, Sweetheart,” Oliver said and lifted Millie onto the mattress. He kissed her cheek. “How did you sleep?”

“Good.”

“Yeah?” Oliver asked. “Did you have sweet dreams?”

Millie just giggled and snuggled up to his chest. Oliver kissed the crown of her head and wrapped his arms around her tightly, closing his eyes. He loved cuddle times in the morning and he was very relieved to know he still had two children who liked to crawl into bed with him and cuddle. Emmy was almost too old for it since, with her six and a half years, daddy apparently wasn’t the coolest person on the earth any longer and Tommy only came for morning cuddles when Felicity was there to cuddle with. Millie and Addie enjoyed it almost as much as he did, though.

“It looks like Emmy, Tommy and William are up and downstairs already,” Felicity said when she came back into the room, carrying Addie on her arm. “Give me five minutes in the bathroom and then we can go downstairs to check if they are already burning off the house.”

Oliver adjusted Millie’s position on top of him a little, pulling her more against his side, so Felicity could lay Addie down on the other side of his chest. He put a hand to his baby’s butt and kissed the crown of her head.

“I doubt William would let that happen,” Oliver told Felicity eventually. “He is fifteen. I think we can trust him in the kitchen.”

Felicity chuckled, turning around on the doorstep to the bathroom and cocking her head. “Are you kidding? Thea told me you almost burned down your home when you were seventeen. If it hadn’t been for Raisa, the mansion would have probably burnt down years before it did.”

“Hey, I was drunk,” Oliver replied. When Felicity closed the door between them, he added in a mumble, “And Tommy trying to juggle with eggs didn’t help either. It was quite distracting.”

Eventually, Millie rolled away from him and started crawling around in bed. Oliver pulled Addie to the middle of his chest and smiled at his baby girl. Her big, blue eyes looked at him for a moment before she smiled and released a happy squeal.

Looking at how content his two little girls were, Oliver felt himself growing a little more nervous about telling the kids today. He knew they would get affected if he ran for mayor. These past years, he had been a stay-at-home dad if he hadn’t worked at QC or QI to cover for Felicity when she had been on maternity leave. Working in the politics now would change things for them.

Yet, he wanted to try. He had always been more than amazed by how Felicity could throw herself into work with all of her heart and still be the best mom their kids could wish for. When she was here and not working from her home office, then she focused solely on her family. Despite all the work she had to do, she still found ways to surprise him and the kids and give them something special. He hoped he would manage to balance his work and his family life half as well as she did.

“Boody,” Millie said, sitting down against the pillow behind him, one leg to each side of his head. She leaned her head over him and stroked her little fingers over his forehead where Oliver realized a deep frown must have built. She frowned and pushed her bottom lip forward a little. “Dada boody.”

Oliver chuckled. “Yes, daddy is brooding a little.”

“Boody?”

“Yes, daddy is broody today,” Oliver replied. “It’s a big day for daddy, you know?”

“Kiss?”

Oliver smiled. “A kiss will definitely make it better.”

He puckered his lips and Millie framed his face with her little hands, clenching them to fists in his short stubble. She leaned forward and captured his lips in a gentle kiss then. Oliver smiled since the only other person who had ever kissed him upside down like this was Felicity.

“Hey, and who kisses mommy?” Felicity asked.

“Millie!” Millie replied, breaking the kiss with Oliver.

She crawled over his face, her diapered butt pressing onto his face for a moment. When she reached the edge of the mattress, she took hold of the hoody Felicity was wearing and used the hold on her clothing to climb up her body, making Felicity chuckle.

“Hi, Sweetheart,” Felicity said when Millie framed her face with her little hands like she had done for Oliver before. Millie kissed her mommy gently before she rested her head against her shoulder. Felicity smiled. “Thank you.”

Oliver sat up in bed, kissing Addie’s cheek. “Come on, we go downstairs before your older siblings really burn the house down.”

Together the four of them made their way downstairs. As soon as they had reached the bottom of the stairs, Millie started whining, so Felicity let her down. Immediately, the little girl started running to the kitchen where noises were coming from. Felicity shot Oliver a look and he just shrugged his shoulders, no idea what was going on.

When they were right in front of the door to the kitchen, he heard William whisper, “Emmy, hurry. If Millie’s here, Felicity and dad will be here any second.”

“Ready!” she called out.

Felicity pushed the door further open and stood still. Oliver stepped behind her, looking over her shoulders into the kitchen and perked up his eyebrows. The table had been set. A small basket with toast as well as a bowl of scrambled eggs and basically everything edible that had been in the fridge was on the table. An expensive breakfast at a restaurant couldn’t have looked better. William, Emmy and Tommy were standing behind the table, smiling proudly.

“Wow,” Oliver said. “Did you three do all of this?”

“Yes,” Emmy said, smiling happily. “It was William’s idea. We just helped.”

“Oh-oh,” Felicity said.

“Oh-oh,” Millie mimicked her mommy’s voice immediately, climbing on one of the chairs.

“I think this is the moment to ask either what you did wrong and want to make up for or what you want and try to get into our good graces because I am pretty sure fifteen-year-olds don’t do something like this without second though,” Felicity continued. She stepped into the kitchen and took a closer look at the breakfast. “On the other hand, this looks and smells so delicious that maybe I don’t want to know.”

Oliver stepped in to the kitchen too and sat down on one of the chairs, cradling Addie to his chest, when he said, “Maybe they don’t want anything but to show their parents how much they love them.”

“Actually…”

“Told ya,” Felicity said triumphantly.

She sat down on the chair next to Oliver. Immediately, Tommy climbed onto her lap. Emmy and William sat down around the table too after William had pushed Millie’s chair a little close to the table. She hated her high chair and since not sitting in it was basically the only demand she had ever made, Felicity and he and decided to just let her sit on a normal chair.

“So,” Oliver said with almost business-like tone, “shoot. What do you want?”

“Well, there is a new climbing park,” William said. “I figured maybe we could go there. Andy was there last week and he said it’s also something for preschool kids to have fun, so Emmy and Tommy would like it too.”

“Yes, daddy, please,” Emmy said pleadingly, looking at him with her big blue eyes. “Please.”

Oliver shot Felicity a look. She was chuckling slightly. When she felt his gaze on her skin, she turned her head and shrugged her shoulders.

“Don’t look at me,” she said. She covered Tommy’s ear with her hands for a moment and added, “Someone needs to be responsible and take care of Millie and Addie in case you all die because of some crazy hobby.”

Oliver grunted and explained for William, who frowned at Felicity’s weird words, “She is afraid of heights.”

“I wouldn’t say I am afraid,” Felicity replied. “I just have some reasonable respect and try to avoid them, but if you want to die because of some crazy hobby, have fun.”

“I guess that is a no then?” William asked.

Felicity chuckled and put a hand to Oliver’s shoulder. “No, it means that this is something you have to negotiate about with your dad. I will start eating already because this looks delicious and I want to have a few bites before Addie decides it’s time for her breakfast.”

While Felicity was already starting breakfast and getting Millie some slices of cucumber to nibble at, Emmy and William turned more to Oliver.

“Daddy, please,” Emmy asked once more.

“I am sure it’s fun and a great thing for… motoric something for little kids.”

When Oliver cocked his head at his oldest son, he grinned innocently. Oliver released a sigh and leaned over to Tommy, who was still sitting on Felicity’s lap.

“What about you, Buddy? Do you want to go to a climbing park with William, Emmy and me?”

“What about mommy?” Tommy asked.

“Mommy is going to stay here with Millie and Addie.”

“But I am sure you will have a lot of fun with daddy, William and Emmy,” Felicity told Tommy. “And you can tell me all about it when you are back.”

Tommy puckered his lips for a moment, but then he nodded. “Okay.”

Oliver chuckled, knowing it was the most of excitement he would get from Tommy. He sat back up straight and nodded his head. “Fine. We go.”

“Cool,” Emmy and William said in chorus high-fived.

“I will go and-“

“You are not going anywhere,” Oliver held Emmy back. “We are going to have breakfast together now.”

“Okay,” she said with a sigh.

Tommy slid off Felicity’s lap and went around the table to the free chair next to Emmy. Oliver got Addie’s baby bouncer from the living room in the meantime. She was quite unhappy when he put her down into it, but once he started getting the thing to move a little, she quieted down and eventually fell back asleep. He knew it wouldn’t last long, but at least Felicity would have time to enjoy the breakfast before Addie would wake up and she would have to breastfeed her.

The family chatted about this and that, laughing and just having fun. Oliver loved when the whole family was together. It was hard to explain, but somehow it was just different when William was there with them too. They felt even more complete then, complete in a different way maybe.

Emmy had just started, for the umpteenth time this week, telling the story about how her teacher Ms. Anderson had complimented her for her excellent homework when Oliver felt Felicity’s foot stroking up and down his calf. Oliver turned his head and looked at her. She was smiling encouragingly, holding her head cocked and her eyebrows perked up. When Oliver took in a deep breath, knowing exactly what she was trying to say, Felicity’s smile grew even gentler. She reached out a hand for him and Oliver took it in both of his, holding onto it when he cleared his throat.

“Kids, there is something we need to discuss.”

“Oh-oh,” Millie said since it was her favorite thing to say.

Oliver chuckled. “No, it’s not something bad. I think.”

“It’s not,” Felicity encouraged him, squeezing his hand.

Turning his head, he smiled at her for a moment. He didn’t know what he would do if it wasn’t for her. Felicity’s support, especially in this, meant the world to him. He might have some doubts about this plan, but knowing Felicity encouraged and supported him nonetheless was all that he needed.

“You know that there have been a lot of news about Starling lately,” he started. “Mommy had this problem coming home last week because a street was full of water and then the mayor quit his job and now the city is a little lost.”

“Didn’t the last mayors quit too?” William asked.

“That,” Felicity replied. “Or they-“

“-were fired,” Oliver interrupted Felicity quickly. He doubted it was the right thing to tell the kids that some mayors had been killed. He didn’t want to scare them. “Anyway, I was thinking that maybe I could run for mayor.”

William perked up his eyebrows. “Really?”

“Really?” Tommy echoed his brother’s question.

“Why?” Emmy asked.

“Oh-oh,” Millie made.

Felicity chuckled and pulled Millie onto her lap kissing her cheek. “There is no reason to say oh-oh. This is a great idea daddy had.”

“But who will take care of us?” Emmy asked.

“Does mommy come back home?” Tommy asked.

“Do you even know how to work in the politics?” William asked.

“I don’t know that much about politics yet,” Oliver answered William’s question first, “but those are things I can learn. I know that I want to make this city a better place for you and for everyone who is living here and that is the first and probably the most crucial step. Everything else and that includes who is going to take care of you if I have to work are things we are going to figure out together, all of us together, if you are okay with me giving this a try.”

There was a long moment of silence. Neither of the three kids that were old enough to have an opinion on this were saying anything.

“Okay, look,” Oliver continued, unable to take the silence for too long. “I know this is a big thing. I know there will be a lot of changes. Like you said, once I start working again, of course we need to find someone who takes care of you. The last thing mommy and I want is for either of you to feel uncomfortable. At first, I can still do a lot of work from home and then mommy can work from home more. After that, we will find a solution and someone you really like who can help taking care of you.”

“Like Deepa’s au-pair?” Emmy asked.

Oliver nodded, relieved she came up with an example of her own. “Yes, exactly. You liked her, right?”

“She was nice,” Emmy replied, nodding her head. “And she’s young and beautiful.”

“And mommy and daddy will still have a lot of time for you,” Oliver added for Tommy, who didn’t seem to be too fond of the idea of not having his mommy back as a fulltime-parent. “I am just going to take care of people in this city too.”

“Okay,” Tommy just replied, shrugging his shoulders and grabbing a slice of cucumber.

“Okay,” Millie echoed, clapping her hands. “Okay.”

“I pack my backpack for the climbing park,” Emmy announced and slid off the chair to hurry upstairs.

“I will go and text Audrey. Can she come with us too?” William asked as casually as possible.

“Sure,” Oliver replied, too surprised by the kids’ reaction to even really progress William’s question. “Just ask her parents if it’s okay.”

“Great. Thanks, Dad.”

Oliver frowned, looking at Felicity confusedly. “What just happened? I had expected long talks and discussions and tears and cries of ‘Daddy don’t leave us’ and at first it looked like exactly that would happen and then it’s all just fine?”

Felicity chuckled and shrugged her shoulders. “Apparently.”

He really had expected more. He couldn’t even say what exactly he had expected, but definitely more. This was a big step, not only for him, but also for the kids. Maybe they didn’t know this yet, but things would change for them, too.

When Millie struggled off her lap, Felicity let go of her and slid closer to Oliver. She laced her fingers through his and kissed his cheek. Oliver smiled, leaning his forehead against her temple and pressing his nose against her cheekbone for a moment. He breathed in the scent of her skin, letting the feeling of love and safety he associated with it spreading in his chest.

“This is the right thing to do,” Felicity whispered. “You are setting up a great example for ours kids.”

Oliver nodded slowly, appreciating her encouragement. He pulled back a little to look at Felicity, gently tugging a strand of her hair behind her ear. He pecked her lips shortly.

“I am just worried what we will do with the kids, you know?” he asked. “We can’t just give them to anyone. There are too many crazy people out there and this city as well as our family seems to attract them in some magical way.”

“Yes, we do. Anyway, we can try finding an au-pair like you suggested. It could be fun for the kids,” Felicity said. When Addie released a cry, she got up and put her arms around his shoulders from behind, kissing his cheek once more. “We will find a solution for it that we can all live with. I promise. If necessary, I will find a good nanny and an army of bodyguards to protect our kids, whatever you feel you need.”

“To my own surprise it’s more about finding someone who is good with them and who is going to take good care of them, emotionally than about their safety. It’s crazy right?”

Oliver himself was definitely surprised by it. He had always thought it was all about the kids’ safety, but for the first time, he felt there was more behind it.

“We will find someone,” Felicity whispered once more.

Oliver sighed. “I hope so.”

Felicity kissed his cheek one last time before she took care of Addie. Oliver stayed where he was a little longer. When Emmy had just been born, he hadn’t liked giving her away even for an hour with their friends. He had wanted her close to protect her the entire time. He had found contentment and peace in his family, though. He didn’t need them all the time to know they were safe. Yet, trusting that a stranger with their wellbeing, not only their physical but also their emotional, still seemed like a lot to ask.

He would have to do so, though. If he wanted to be mayor and he felt like he really wanted that, then there was no way around it.

 

 

When Oliver turned into the driveway in front of their house, he shot a look into the rearview mirror and smiled when he saw that both, Emmy and Tommy, had fallen asleep. The day had been a real success. William had had a good idea with the climbing park as all of them had really enjoyed it. Oliver had the quiet suspicion that William had mainly wanted to go there to take Audrey there. He would have to talk to his oldest son when he was back from dinner with his crush that if he had just told Oliver, he would have driven them there and they could have spent the day without Oliver, Emmy and Tommy in the back of their necks.

Oliver turned off the engine and picked the sleeping kids up, one on each arm. He had to juggle with the keys a little until he could open the front door. He didn’t want to wake up the kids, so he just went upstairs without saying anything and put the kids into their beds without changing them. If they wouldn’t wake up in the next thirty minutes, he’d wake them up. They wouldn’t be able to sleep in the night otherwise.

Halfway back down the stairs, Felicity stepped to the foot of the stairs, smiling at him.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hi,” Oliver replied.

He hurried down the rest of the stairs. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her off the floor a little bit, making her chuckle. His lips captured hers in a gentle kiss. Felicity gave into it with a sigh, stroking her fingers through his short hair and massaged the back of his neck. Oliver stroked his tongue against hers, holding her to him even more tightly. God, how much he loved coming home to her.

When their lips parted, Felicity nuzzled his nose. Oliver put her back onto her feet, not holding her any less tightly, though. His hands stroked over her back while he was just smiling at her for a moment.

“You seem to be in a good mood,” Felicity said, cocking her head slightly.

Oliver nodded. “The climbing park was a lot of fun.”

“Good,” Felicity said with a smile and pecked his lips. “Where are the kids?”

“I dropped William and Audrey at the pizzeria and Emmy and Tommy are in their beds. They fell asleep on the way home,” Oliver explained. “Millie and Addie?”

“In the living room, getting to know our guest.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “We have a guest?”

Felicity chuckled, nodding her head. “Actually, more than a new housemate and family member.”

“Please tell me you didn’t buy them a dog,” Oliver pleaded.

“No,” Felicity laughed and slapped his chest playfully, “of course not.”

Oliver frowned, wordless asking who Felicity had invited to live with them. He had been away for less than ten hours. How had she managed to expand their family without his knowledge in that little time? Felicity didn’t just answer. Instead, she smiled mysteriously, took his hand and pulled him towards the living room.

“You did not get married to someone new and suggest a ménage à trois now, right?” he asked on their way. “I think I will have to kill our new family member in that case. Not that I would even see him as family.”

Felicity shot a look back over her shoulder, slightly rolling her eyes. Oliver chuckled. He knew she hadn’t, but it never hurt asking. It had been the wildest of guesses he had had and-

When Oliver stepped into the living room and saw who was sitting on the couch, Addie on her lap and Millie tugged to her side as she was reading them a story, he stopped. His fingers tightened around Felicity’s hand as his heartbeat quickened a little. Old memories of his childhood, afternoons in the kitchen with deliciously smelling cookies and hot chocolate, as well as exciting bedtime stories about pirated and sea monsters awoke. For a moment, he almost felt as safe and worriless as he had felt back then, like nothing could ever touch him or his family.

“Mr. Oliver,” Raisa said when she looked up from the book for a moment.

Felicity turned her head around to him, squeezing his hand for a moment. When she let go, she went over to Raisa and took Addie from her. Raisa stroked her hand over Millie’s hair gently and handed her the book before she got up and approached Oliver, a motherly smile on her lips.

“Raisa.” He crossed the distance to Raisa and hugged her. She still smelled the way he remembered, her perfume a mixture of peppermint and some flower he wasn’t sure of. It was a scent he would always connect with some of his favorite childhood memories. “It’s so good to see you again.”

When Oliver pulled back from the hug, keeping his hands on Raisa’s shoulders, she was still smiling at him. It had been way too long since he had seen her the last time, almost a year actually. Felicity had organized a party for him since he had been back for ten years and Raisa had been there, to Oliver’s utter joy. He remembered how uncomfortable he had felt when she had more or less told him that she wasn’t as happy with her new job. He would have liked to help with that, but he had seen no way.

“It’s good to see you too, Mr. Oliver,” Raisa replied.

Oliver chuckled. “You should really just call me Oliver.”

“Old habits are hard to let go of.”

“That’s true.” Oliver nodded, smiling at her. Admittedly, he loved the way she called him. Mr. Oliver. He couldn’t say why. There was something sweet and so lovely about it. He was almost glad she didn’t want to change it. “What are you doing here? I mean… is everything alright? Did something happen?”

“Mrs. Felicity came to my workplace,” Raisa replied, “and told me about your plan. It is an ambitious scheme, but I am sure if someone can do it, it’s you. Your mother tried and had good chances, but you have more heart. You understand the people. You will be great.”

“Thank you, Raisa,” he whispered.

“Mrs. Felicity asked me to work for you and take care of your kids,” Raisa told him. “I said I would agree if it is what you want too.”

Oliver smiled. “Absolutely. I couldn’t have chosen anyone better. Thank you for doing this.”

“You and your family have always felt like family to me,” Raisa told him. “I am very happy to see your kids and take care of them now the way I took care of you when you were a child.”

“I was really worried about this step, finding someone to take care of the kids,” Oliver admitted and took Raisa’s hands. He felt the words deep in his heart even before he said them. “I really didn’t think there would be a solution I would be this happy with.”

“That makes me happy,” Raisa replied. She put her hand to his cheek gently. “Your parents would be so proud of you.”

The words meant a lot to him, especially coming from Raisa. She had known his parents for so long and she had known him since the day he had been born. Raisa had always been part of his family and he couldn’t even fathom how much he had missed her.

“I will… go upstairs and unpack a few things.”

“Of course,” Oliver replied. “Did Felicity show you where you can sleep or-“

“Oh, she showed me one of the guest rooms, a wonderful room. I doubt I haver had more space in my entire life.”

“Make yourself at home. If there is anything more you need or want or-“

“Mrs. Felicity already told me I should come to her if there is anything I can think of,” Raisa replied with a smile. “I doubt it will be necessary. The room looked really nice. You two are too kind.”

“No, we really aren’t,” Oliver replied and hugged Raisa once more. “Thank you for coming here to live with us.”

“You are welcome.”

When Oliver let go of her, Raisa shot him another smile and turned around to go.

“Raisa!” Millie shouted and crawled off the couch to run to her.

“Oh, Millie, don’t you want to let Raisa get some rest?” Oliver asked.

Raisa waved it off though and lifted Millie into her arms. “Come here, Ms. Camille. You can help me unpack.”

Oliver watched his family’s former housemaid taking Millie upstairs, the smile on his lips so wide that his cheeks almost hurt from it. He and Raisa had always had a special bond. In some way, she had always been like a second mother to him. When his father had been too strict with him and his mother had taken her husband’s side, he had still had Raisa. He knew his kids didn’t need a second mother since they already had a wonderful mother – or in William’s case two actually – but having Raisa in their lives would still be a good thing.

He turned around to where Felicity was lying on the couch with Addie on her chest. He lifted the baby off Felicity chest and laid her down on the couch, ignoring the dissatisfied cry she released. He put his hands to each side of Felicity’s body, slowly lowering himself onto her.

“You” – he kissed her the side of her neck, his lips finding her pulse point – “are” – he kissed the soft spot under her ear that made her hum contently – “the best” – he kissed her right cheek – “damn” – he kissed her left cheek – “thing” – he kissed her forehead – “that ever” – he kissed the tip of her nose – “happened to me.”

He smiled at Felicity and she smiled back. Oliver stroked his hand over her hair and nuzzled her nose. He had never though it was possible to love someone this much, but Felicity surprised him all the time. His love for her would never end, never no any limits. Well, it didn’t know any limits apart from agreeing to an open marriage.

“I love you,” he told her and lowered his lips onto hers, kissing her gently. When their lips parted, he nuzzled his nose once more. “I love you so much, even more than I could ever say.”

Felicity smiled. “I love you too.”

When Addie released a loud cry, rolling onto her stomach and slapping her hand at her father’s cheek, Oliver rolled off Felicity. She pulled Addie back against her chest and made herself comfortable, snuggled up to Oliver’s side. He put his arm around her shoulders, holding her close, and kissed her temple.

“Did you have this idea today?” Oliver asked her eventually.

“No, last night actually,” Felicity replied.

Oliver shot had a look, thinking back to their night of making love. “That was what you have been thinking of last night?”

Felicity chuckled. “Later that night.”

“Good,” Oliver replied. “I was already wondering what I would have to do with you this night to chase away all the thoughts.”

He didn’t miss the way Felicity blushed when she said, “Anyway, I found out where she is working and used the afternoon to snatch her away from her current employers. Well, they are not her current employers any longer. They didn’t deserve her anyway. They were terribly, barely agreed for her to get a break to talk to me. I could have danced out of that house triumphantly when Raisa chose to come with me instead of staying with them. They were so pissed I stole her during her worktime.”

Oliver grinned. “It’s kind of turning me on when you are doing mischief.”

Felicity smirked and nibbled at his jaw for a moment. “Good thing it’s not long until bedtime, so keep that feeling.”

“Oh, trust me,” Oliver replied, already imaging all the thing he would do with her. “I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teaser for the next chapter (to be published on Sunday):
> 
> Oliver XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXX.


	253. United

As soon as Oliver saw Felicity stepping into his campaign office, he released a breath of relief.

“Excuse me for a moment,” he asked Alex, not caring that he interrupted him midsentence. “I will be right back.”

With that, Oliver pushed himself through the crowd of two dozen of reporters that were here for his first press conference as a mayoral candidate. After he had told the kids about his plan and had made sure that they were okay with this idea, he had told the rest of his family as well as his friends. They had all supported his decision. Thea had even asked if she could actively help him with the campaign since Verdant felt more like Roy’s project than hers by now and as a mother-to-be she wanted some professional change. The first three steps she had taken to help him were preparing Sebastian Blood’s old campaign office for him, hiring Alex Danvers as a political strategist and convening this press conference.

Oliver tried to ignore the flashlights of the cameras that were hailing down on him, feeling his thumb rub against the other fingertips nervously. He had forgotten how it felt to be the interest of media. Over the years, the interest in his person and his family had calmed down. Apart from official occasions Felicity had to attend to represent Queen Incorporated, the media didn’t care much about them anymore. Their happy family life seemed to be too boring for them to write anything about it. Every now and then, they took a photo of him and the kids when they were out in the park and wrote an article about where Ollie Queen had gotten lost.

“Hey, I’m sorry that I’m late. I got-“

Not hesitating, Oliver interrupted Felicity’s unnecessary apology with a kiss to her lips. He could feel Felicity’s surprise in the way she tensed for a second before she sighed and melted against him. Oliver felt his nerves calming down a little despite the clicking of the cameras that told him the reporters were trying to gather some footage of his happily married life to work with the background information they would probably write into their articles.

When their lips parted, Oliver smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist loosely. “Thank God you are here.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hands over the lapels of his suit jacket. She adjusted his tie with a smile and leaned her head back. She smiled at him for a moment, not saying a word, and just took in his face.

“Nervous?”

“Very,” he admitted, knowing she could see it in his face anway. “It’s a little better now that you are here.”

He laced his fingers through her and tugged her with him to where John, Donna and Quentin were waiting for them. He had felt almost a little emotional when they had offered to come here. John was his best friend and Donna and Quentin were like parents to him. Having them here on this day meant a lot, especially since he and Felicity had decided not to take the kids with them. They would get into this media circus soon enough.

“Ready?” Quentin asked him when they stepped towards him.

“Ready or not, it’s almost time,” Oliver replied. He smiled nervously, looking around where reporters were talking to one another. “I didn’t think so many people would come.”

“Your family has always been of interest for the media,” John pointed out, “even if they were a little less interested lately. Are you ready for the wonderful stories they might write about you?”

“Oh, even I remember the horrible news guy who claimed Felicity falling down the stairs and Tommy being born in an emergency C-section was a cheap trick to gain media interest,” Donna said and shook her head, “and I haven’t even lived in Starling at that point yet.”

_Mr. Queen, first your sister got kidnapped while you mother was running for mayor, now your wife falls down the stairs in the middle of your candidacy. Is it part of the Queen family’s campaign strategy to call attention on your private life by getting family members in mortal danger?_

Oliver felt his stomach drop. He remembered that guy clearly, mainly because he had featured a lot of terrible articles about his family in the past, including one that painted Felicity as a gold digger and Tommy as Ray Palmer’s child. There had always been terrible rumors about him and his family, even when his parents had still been alive. That guy had outdone all of those, though. It was why the Arrow had paid him a little visit once, just to frighten him.

“I didn’t even think about that,” Oliver whispered.

“Because you don’t have to,” Felicity assured him. “No matter what they write or say, we know the truth.”

Oliver looked at her and the encouraging smile on her lips gave him the certainty he needed to forget the new worries. There were always new worries if he let them rise. He laced his fingers with Felicity’s and squeezed her hand. The touch of her hand soothed him a little.

“How is Raisa getting along with the kids by the way?” Donna asked eventually. “She seems like a wonderful person.”

“She is,” Oliver replied with a relieved smile. “She has always been like a second mother to me, so I couldn’t have asked for anyone better to take care of the kids.”

“Sounds great,” Quentin replied. “And in case you need more support, I am always open for the grandparent’s duty. It will keep me in form when Laurel is going to have kids one days.”

“You think now with Liam the right time might have come?” Felicity asked him.

Quentin shrugged his shoulders. “Who knows? Time is running out. She is going to turn forty in two years and-“

“Oh, how charming,” Donna replied and playfully slapped the back of his head.

“Hey, I was just-“

“Ollie?” Thea interrupted Quentin, stepping closer to Oliver. “It’s time.”

Oliver took in a deep breath, turning around to Felicity once more. She smiled and squeezed his hand.

“You will be great,” she told him and straightened up onto the tips of her toes to peck his lips. “Good luck.”

“Thanks.”

Oliver pecked her lips once more before he let go of Felicity’s hand and stepped behind the ambo. Immediately, everyone turned around to him. The reporters took photos and got their microphones ready. Oliver felt a little nervous since he had everyone’s attention now. His eyes found Felicity’s and that gave him the calmness he needed, though.

“Thanks everyone for coming,” he started. “As you can all tell from the election posters, I decided to throw my head into the ring for the mayoral race. Not that there will be much of a race, I guess, since usually Starling can be relieved when there is one candidate.”

The reporters as well as his friends chuckled. Oliver smiled in response and took in a deep breath. This was probably going better than he had thought it would. Then again, he had just said two sentences, so he was still at the very start of this. He shot another look at Felicity, not caring that he might seem like an insecure little boy. This was everything but easy and her encouragement and the certainty that she was here made it at least a little bit easier.

“That there won’t be much of a competition doesn’t mean that I won’t put the same effort into this candidacy as I would if I wasn’t the only candidate,” Oliver continued. “This city has been my home since the day I have been born. It’s been my parents’ home and it is and will be my children’s home. This is what makes this city so important to me and what made me decide to join into the mayoral race.”

Oliver shot a look at the paper where he had taken notes for his speech. Alex had helped him with it, telling him what was the best way to start this marathon of press conferences and interviews that would follow in the next months. Before he had stepped up here, he had agreed to the speech. It had seemed like the right thing to say. Now he wasn’t so sure anymore. He wanted to speak from the heart as Felicity had said it back when he had tried to get the company back. Even after years of opening up to her and the other people closest to him, doing so in front of strangers still was hard.

“United,” he tried to speak from her heart nonetheless. “That’s what this city used to be. It’s what it can be again. It’s what it must be again. Now, I know that I’m not the obvious choice for mayor. I’m- I’m not a politician. Years ago, I signed away my family’s company. When we got it back, I was more than relieved that my wife is into technology so much because that meant that she could take over the position as CEO. I can’t think of anyone who would could lead that company with so much passion, ingenuity and professionalism.”

He looked at Felicity, locking eyes with her for a moment. Felicity smiled and nodded her head, barely visible for anyone but him. It was her way to wordlessly tell him that she knew he meant every word of it. He hadn’t planned to compliment her like that because, though it was true, he didn’t want to make it look like he was using her for his promotion. He knew Felicity knew him better than that, though.

“These last couple of years, I was a stay-at-home dad and I was happy with it. It was the kind of job I liked and I was really good at. I mean… I didn’t even graduate from college, although, in my defense, I did go to four of them.”

Again, the reporters all chuckled. Felicity whispered something to Thea, who linked her arm with her sister-in-law’s. Two of the five most important women in his life together in the audience, supporting him.

“I certainly don’t have a traditional background for leadership, but I can tell you this – after five years in hell, I returned home with only one goal. I wanted to save my city. And with your help, I can. With your help, we will restore our home to the shining beacon we know it can be. But how we’re going to get there isn’t a mystery. We will overcome our challenges with help from our friends, our family, our loved ones. Those we trust, and those we will need to trust again in order to prevail. Because the only way that we are going to return our home to the amazing place it can be is to do so together. United.”

The reporters and the other people that were present applauded him. His eyes found Felicity’s and the proud smile on her lips made him know it had been the right choice to speak from the heart. It really had been.

 

 

“The most important step for now is to figure out your political program,” Alex stated. “We should also make sure people become aware of you, especially but not exclusively in the local politics. I brought you a list with occasions that are suitable to make an appearance. Since you talked about your family and we will definitely promote your love for this city as the home of your family, it would be even better if you could both attend.”

Alex handed Oliver a list. While he was skimming the several dozens of occasions listed there, Felicity leaned closer to his side, reading over his shoulder.

“That’s a lot of occasions,” Oliver said.

“The next seven months until you are hopefully called into the office will definitely be some of the most exhausting ones,” Alex told him. “Until the elections, it’s a lot about promotions and that means making appearances and presenting yourself and your family in the best light. Every mistake could be Are you still in?”

“Of course I am,” Oliver assured him. “At how many occasions should I be? Like a minimum?”

“I’d usually say ten.”

“But given our family’s reputation and the fact it is associated with the deaths of hundreds of citizens, rather fifteen,” Thea added. She looked at Alex. “Right?”

“Right.”

“I will do my best,” Oliver replied and frowned when Felicity snapped the list from his hands and started taking photos. “What are you doing?”

“I am sending this to Emily, so she can make room in my schedule.”

“You don’t have to,” Oliver replied immediately. “I mean I would love to have you there but-“

“No buts,” Felicity interrupted him. She handed him back the list and smiled. “Together, remember?”

Oliver smiled, taking her hand and lifting it to his hand to kiss her knuckles. Sometimes he wondered where Felicity was taking all this energy from. She just never failed to amaze him.

“Okay, so I am going to figure out what values exactly I want to represent,” Oliver said and nodded his head. “I will take care of that.”

“I suggest you just think about it a little and then you show it to Thea and me and together we will brainstorm a little and make it a rounded package.”

Again, Oliver nodded. “Okay. Anything more?”

“Well, we figured the city should also get to know you as a person,” Thea told him, “a different person than the guy who peed on a cop or stole a taxi.”

“It would be better for your image if the city to see you as the family man you are now,” Alex added. “I think he is the person people will trust the city with.”

Oliver nodded one more time since there wasn’t much else to do. He looked back and forth between Alex and Thea, noticing how in tune they seemed to be with each other. Thea really seemed to have found a great new way to explore her abilities.

“So, what do you have in mind?” Felicity asked eventually, her hand stroking up and down Oliver’s back. “How do you want to spruce up his image?”

“The best way would be a story of the two of you and your family at your home and-”

“No,” Oliver and Felicity interrupted Alex in chorus.

“But it’s-“

“No,” Oliver said once more, shaking his head firmly. “No way. Our home is a taboo zone. No reporter will ever go in there.”

“You see that from the wrong point of view,” Alex told him. “I know it’s weird letting people into your home, but-“

“I think this point is nonnegotiable,” Felicity said firmly. “Our home stays our home and our kids won’t get into the middle of the media circus either. There will be enough interest on them as it is and I don’t mind bringing them for some occasions because I know they will want to support their dad, but not like that. I can bring a family photo for the newspapers to print, but I or rather we will decide what that photo looks like.”

Alex shot a look to Thea like maybe she would take his side and try convincing her brother of his idea. Thea just shrugged her shoulders, though. Oliver was sure his little sister knew that Felicity was right and this was indeed nonnegotiable. He and Felicity would protect their kids from the media as much as possible. They knew it meant giving in sometimes and not hiding the kids away, but they would do their best to make this work on their terms.

“Okay, so no story at your home,” Alex said, clearing his throat. He seemed confused for a moment, unsure of what exactly to do. “How about a story about the two of you at some other place that is associated with you and your family?”

“We have Queen Incorporated.”

Alex grimaced. “That’s a little too connected with Felicity by now and given the company used to manufacture weapons, it could lead to tough questions. The idea isn’t bad, though. Maybe we have some other place that-”

“What about the exhibition premises in the Robert Queen Applied Science Center?” Felicity suggested. “It would work with the family theme and it’s still a somewhat neutral room. It’s linked to QI, but also to the Queen Family in particular. It allows Oliver to talk about his parents as well as the rest of his family.”

“But Ollie was drunk when it was dedicated,” Thea said.

“Which will allow the direct contrast of the boy that came back from the island, still a little lost and insecure about where he belonged, and the man he has grown to be.”

Oliver frowned at Felicity. “That’s a good idea.”

She chuckled. “I have a lot of good ideas.”

Her eyes sparkled with amusement and Oliver was tempted to lean over and capture her lips in a gentle kiss. He wanted to taste her smile, knowing he would savor the taste of happiness there. With Alex and Thea in the room, Oliver settled for lifting her hand and kissing the back of it.

“How will you decide who gets to do this interview?” Thea asked Alex.

“I already have tabs on someone,” Alex replied. “She’s not a big gun in the media yet, especially not in politics, but she is smart and determined. It could get us a good story without getting us into any trouble with too uncomfortable questions.”

“Sounds good,” Oliver replied. “Anything more?”

“I think that’s enough for now.”

“Perfect,” Felicity replied. “Let me know as soon as you made an appointment and I will be there.”

“But for today, we are going home to our kids,” Oliver suggested.

“Sounds great.”

He and Felicity said goodbye to Alex and Thea before they left. On their way to Felicity’s car, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple. Felicity smiled at him.

“So, did it all go the way you expected?” Felicity asked him.

“I am not sure what I expected,” Oliver admitted honestly, “but I think it’s going well and it’s feeling good.”

Felicity smiled “That’s great.”

“It is.” Oliver nodded and turned his head to look at Felicity. “But now I can’t wait to get back to our kids.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Felicity replied. She rested her head against his shoulder. “Maybe we could stop at Big Belly’s and get some tasty dinner.”

“Or maybe we could stop at the supermarket and get everything for me to cook some healthy dinner,” Oliver suggested. When Felicity screwed up her nose at that, he chuckled and tightened his arm around her. “What did you have for lunch?”

“A salad, an apple and a carrot,” Felicity replied. “A lot of vitamins and other healthy stuff.”

Oliver rolled his eyes. “Hon, if you want to lie to me, try making it a little more believable.”

“By doing what?” Felicity asked.

“I don’t know,” Oliver replied. “Maybe you should say you had a steak with salad instead of fries and maybe, just maybe I would believe you.”

“Okay, I had a steak with salad instead of fries.” Felicity smiled innocently. “Do I get Big Belly’s now?”

“No.” Oliver chuckled, shaking his head. “You really are worse than the kids.”

Felicity pouted and playfully slapped his chest. “Hey, I supported you here today and all I want in return is a burger. That’s not too much to ask, is it?”

Oliver turned around to her quickly, wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her off the floor a little. Felicity released a short screech, but Oliver captured her lips in a kiss and silenced her sounds of shock. With a sigh, she wrapped her arms around his neck and responded to the kiss. When their lips parted, Oliver put his hand to her cheek and nuzzled her nose.

“Thank you for being there to support me today,” he whispered. “It means the world to me.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied with a gentle smile that eventually turned into a grin. “So, do I get my burger now?”

“Nice try,” Oliver replied and stole another kiss from her lips before he put Felicity back to the floor. “But the answer is still no.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teaser for the next chapter: Oliver is at his XXXXXX & Felicity comes over with burgers and fries to XXXX XXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX.


	254. If I didn't have you

Felicity closed the door behind herself as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake up the kids. The house seemed to be dark apart from the light that came from the living room and she smiled quietly at the thought that she wasn’t alone or the only one awake. She dropped her keys in the bowl on the small table next to the door, put her purse to the topmost shelf of the wardrobe and her high heels to the bottommost step of the stairs, so she would remember taking them upstairs when she went to bed.

Oliver had been teasing her for almost two weeks now that she had started being tidier since Raisa had moved in with them. Felicity couldn’t decline it. She just felt like Raisa was as close as a second mother to Oliver which meant that she was almost like a mother-in-law for her. She didn’t want to seem like a messy person who just dropped everything wherever they felt like it. That just wasn’t the way she wanted her mother-in-law to see her. It was already enough that for her actual mother-in-law she had been the person urging her to tell her kids about her unfaithfulness and about Thea’s real dad even if she hadn’t been Oliver’s wife back then. She didn’t want to mess up her second chance with her second mother-in-law.

With a fullhearted yawn, Felicity stretched her arms over head, easing some of the tension from her back, and strolled towards the living room. She had told Oliver not to wait for her since the appointment might take quite long. She wasn’t surprised he had waited nonetheless, at least she assumed so from the light coming from the living room. Oliver rarely ever went to sleep before she was home and went to bed too.

When Felicity stepped into the living room and saw it was Raisa sitting on the couch, reading a book with her hands wrapped around a mug of tea, she frowned, though. Raisa was usually in bed this time of the night. Felicity and Oliver always took over the kids when they were home. They didn’t want to leave the nightshifts to Raisa too.

“Hey,” she said, cocking her head. “What are you doing up so late?”

Raisa smiled, putting her mug of tea away and closed her book. “I got pulled into the story too much and couldn’t stop reading. Now I only have two chapters left and decided to read the end, see where the story takes the protagonists.”

Smiling, Felicity stepped closer. “Oh, I remember those nights from my youth. I really need to start reading more again, well, reading something else than business reports, goodnight stories and whatever at least. I think it’s been more than two years since I read my last book. God, that is so much longer than I thought.”

“I’d borrow you the book,” Raisa replied with a chuckle, “but it’s Russian.”

“Yeah, that would make getting back to reading more again hard.” Felicity smiled. “I could ask Oliver to read it for me, though. Speaking of, where is he?”

“He left a few minutes after you,” Raisa told her. “He said he needed to go back to the office once more.”

“And he didn’t come back yet?” Felicity asked, shooting a glance at her watch.

It was twelve-thirty already. Felicity had taken the afternoon off to spend with her family since she had been forced to go back at nine for a late appointment. Unfortunately, her business partner from Tokio hadn’t been able to meet her earlier and had wanted to fly back home before the morning broke. Since she had been able to take the afternoon off and, by that, been able to spend even more time with her kids since they had been on their way to bed when she had left, she hadn’t minded the late appointment.

Anyway, Oliver hadn’t told her that he would leave once more. Just like her, he had taken the afternoon off from preparing his candidacy to spend the time with her and their kids instead. Felicity had felt like he had needed the distraction. Alex was pressing for him to figure out how he adhered to some subjects of local politics and Felicity figured that Oliver wasn’t that sure about it yet. He knew what he wanted and what he didn’t want for the city, but taking up a position for each issue there was, was still tough for him.

“I am sure Oliver is back soon,” Raisa told her. “Do you want a tea?”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. She smiled at hearing Raisa calling him Oliver instead of Mr. Oliver. It had taken two weeks, but she had eventually given in. Old habits were just hard to get rid of Felicity guessed. “Would you mind if I headed out once more?”

Raisa smiled. “No, of course not. Everything’s quiet here anyway.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied. “I hope it won’t take long, but if it does-“

“-I am just going to take the baby phone with me,” Raisa promised her. “Don’t worry. I have everything handled. I am just going to find a way to nap tomorrow to catch up on some sleep.”

“I know you got everything handled. I am still sorry. This really isn’t supposed to be your job, so I hope it will stay an exception.” Felicity smiled. “By the way, I am really glad you moved in with us and are helping us with the kids. I wouldn’t know what we’d do without you.”

“I am still grateful you asked,” Raisa responded. “It is great seeing Oliver being a father now.”

Felicity nodded. “We both really appreciate you are here and the kids love you so much. I always wondered what you were like since Oliver told me so much about you, so I am more than glad I get the chance of getting to know you now and for my kids to get to know you since you have been such a benefit to his life. It means a lot to the both of us that you are here now. I think you are like family for Oliver and he missed having family around.”

“You and your kids are his family. Thea is his family.”

“I know,” Felicity replied, “but so are you and I think it’s great for him to have you back. You have known him for so long. You have known him since he has been born and you knew his parents. Our kids would love some stories about Oliver’s childhood and about their grandparents. So would Oliver and I by the way.”

Raisa smile, just looking at Felicity for a long moment. “You are doing him good, you know that? The women Oliver used to be with never were the right ones. I always felt they did more damage than good for him, maybe because he wasn’t really ready to let someone in already back then and maybe also because they just didn’t want to see who he really was. I can see the difference with you. You know him. Oliver feels comfortable around you, like he doesn’t have to hide from you and he loves you so much. Neither I nor his parents could be any happier he has finally found the person to make him happy.”

Felicity knew exactly what Raisa meant. She had often thought about the few of Oliver’s exes he had met and all the reasons why their relationships with Oliver had never been able to work. Laurel had pushed their relationship too much before the island, not seeing that she was at least ten steps ahead of Oliver already. After the island she had projected all her anger on him which had blinded her for the man he had grown to be until things had gotten terribly messing with her, Oliver and Tommy. Things with Sara couldn’t have worked because she had been meant to be a distraction from Laurel’s plans for a future at first and later she had just reminded Oliver of the island, especially everything that had happened with Slade and Shado. Helena had been crazy and McKenna couldn’t have understood Oliver as she had been working for the police and hunted Oliver, even if only as his green alter-ego, and Felicity didn’t even want to think about all the mess with evil witch Isabel Rochev.

That Raisa thought of Felicity as an exception for Oliver’s bad taste in women meant a lot to her. She had known him since he had been born. Even if she didn’t know some things about Oliver, she still knew him quite well. It wasn’t rational, yet it meant a lot to her.

“I know he does,” Felicity said, “and I love him just the same way.”

Raisa smiled. “Then go and get Oliver home.”

 

 

Oliver looked at the two dozen of papers he had hung up at the wall across the room, trying to figure out what he was thinking about these issues regarding their priorities and, of course, their solutions. He knew if Felicity felt stuck, she tried to get creative and created something dynamic to work with, so she could play with some options. That was what he had done, but, at least so far, it hadn’t helped him.

Before he had sit down to figure out what exactly he was thinking about all the current issues of the city, he had thought he knew what he wanted for Starling. There were some things that were easy for him, things he knew he wanted and things he knew he didn’t want. Unfortunately, there were so many urgent issues that Oliver wanted to take care of at the same time that he didn’t know where to start, especially given the little money the city had.

How was he supposed to decide which issue was the most urgent one? Well, he knew what problems were the most urgent ones for him – criminality and police corruption. He also knew that vigilantism, on the other hand, wasn’t much of a problem for him. With the way he had taken care of this city in the past almost eleven years now, he had had enough time to think about that. The question was if the city thought the same, especially regarding the vigilantes. According to Alex, his opinion on them would be one of the major factors that decided about his candidacy. Then there were other issues he had no idea what to think about, but Alex had pointed out should be addressed explicitly during his candidacy. There were just things Oliver had no idea about and that he had never really thought about.

With a sigh, Oliver sat down on the edge of his desk and crossed his arms in front of his chest, once more going over the papers. Maybe he should rearrange them once more to-

When there was a quiet knock at the door, Oliver flinched. He hadn’t heard anyone coming into the building. His work had distracted him so much that Oliver’s super-senses hadn’t even worked. He would have to keep an eye on that. He trusted his senses and he had to trust his sensed giving his nighttime job. If distractions caused him to be unfocused, that could end badly.

“Come in,” Oliver said.

He guessed that Thea had been sleepless again and decided to come here as her insomnia was troubling her as much as it had troubled Felicity especially during the first pregnancy. Being pregnant had changed a lot for his baby sister and he was glad that one of those things was quitting her work at Verdant to help him with this. His sister’s support meant a lot to him. When the door opened and Felicity stuck her head into the room, a surprised smile spread on his lips, though.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” he asked.

“Checking on you,” Felicity replied. She stepped in and held up a bag with Big Belly’s delicious, even if terribly unhealthy food and two milkshakes. “And making sure you are strengthened.”

When Oliver’s smile widened, Felicity came closer. She put the junk food on his desk and stepped between his slightly spread legs. Her hands came to frame his face and Oliver leaned into her gentle touch, feeling it comforting him. When Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes and captured his lips in a gentle kiss, Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer. When their tongues touched, Oliver forgot everything he had been working at for a couple of moments and just lost himself in the love for the woman in his arms.

Eventually, their lips parted. Oliver pulled away just enough to nuzzle her nose for a moment. He brushed his lips against hers once more as he always leaned back in for another short kiss to just get a little bit more of the fluttering in his stomach. Years into their marriage, and kissing her still woke a thousand butterflies that dozed inside of him, just waiting to fly again.

“Sorry for leaving once more,” he said with a sigh. “I just wanted to stay for like an hour and be back before you’re home again, but I got sucked up into it and… I don’t know…”

“It’s fine,” Felicity replied. She pecked his lips once more. “I just figured if you have to spend the night here, at least you shouldn’t do it alone. So, do you want to tell me what you are working on? Maybe I can help.”

Oliver smiled, feeling his heart swell with love for his wife. Felicity was leading her own company, yet she came here, after a hard workday, and asked him about his work. It was amazing where she took all that energy from. During his five years away, Oliver had started getting used to living with little energy because had been giving no choice. If he hadn’t been able to keep up despite the little energy, he would have died. He was glad Felicity’s energy didn’t come from a near-death experience like that. He didn’t want her to go through anything like that ever.

Over burgers and milkshakes, Oliver explained to Felicity what he was working on. He told her about the current issues in Starling’s politics as well as what he was thinking about them and where he saw problems with that. Felicity listened closely, just asking a few questions every now and then. Once they had devoured their burgers, they put the papers into an order depending on their priorities. Oliver told Felicity his plans for each of the issues, always keeping in mind what was best for the people, especially the poor ones, living in the city, and Felicity took some notes on the papers, so he would remember. When they were finished, Felicity read out the notes she had taken while Oliver just listened and added if new thoughts came. Only then did Felicity make some suggestions that added to Oliver’s ideas and helped making the whole thing a little more rounded.

“I think your political program is set, Mr. Queen,” Felicity said eventually and put the papers in front of him on the desk with a smile. The way she said it almost reminded him of her time as his PA. “Put it into more professional words, add some nice metaphors and here you go. Well, you should probably talk to Alex first, in case he has things to add, but I think the groundwork is done.”

Oliver smiled and held out a hand for Felicity. Without hesitation, she laced her fingers with his, so Oliver pulled her into his lap. She sat down with both her legs to his right side, her left arm wrapped around his shoulder. Oliver rested his head on her shoulder, putting his right arm around her waist and stroking his left hand up and down her thigh.

The morning had long broken. They had worked all through the night and Oliver could feel his tiredness catching up on him. He couldn’t even imagine how much more tired Felicity had to be. She had had an exhausting workday at QI before working here.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered and kissed her shoulder. “I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her fingertips through his short stubble. “Luckily, that is something you never have to worry about. I am always going to be here for you, no matter what you need.”

“Lucky me.”

“Lucky you,” Felicity repeated. “Are you satisfied with what we worked out?”

“More than satisfied,” Oliver replied. He shot a look at the papers on his desk before he smiled at her again. “I am really happy with it. I think this could do a lot of good for the city. It will be a lot of work, but it’s certainly for the better.”

“You are doing great,” Felicity told him. “What you are doing for this city, your commitment to it, is amazing.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I just want this city to be a good place to live for our family.”

Felicity pressed her lips together for a moment, making Oliver perk up his eyebrows in a silent request to tell him what was going on. She chuckled, stroking her hand over his hair gently.

“I know you keep saying it and I know it’s definitely part of your motivation,” Felicity explained, “but I think there is more behind that. I think you just really love this city for itself and you want it to be the best it can be and, because you are a wonderful human being, you are giving all of yourself to make this city a better place. Sure, it’s partly because of our family living here, but… it’s not the entire reason and that makes me even prouder of you and of what you want to accomplish here.”

Oliver swallowed down the thick lump in his throat. He knew Felicity was proud of him. She proved it every time she looked at him. He’d never get tired of hearing her say it, though.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered. “It means the world coming from you. I know it’s not Thanksgiving yet, but I am really grateful you are a part of my life and that you came here tonight to support me.”

Felicity leaned in and captured his lips in a gentle kiss. She smiled gently when she pulled back. “Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only a short chapter today because the next two are longer again. I am going to post two chapters this and two chapters next week. That will give me some time to write the last chapter for If loving you is wrong and work ahead on the angst storyline that is about to come.
> 
> Teaser for next chapter: It’s a busy day for Felicity when XXXXX XXXXXXXX interviews them. Later Oliver suprises Felicity with a XXXX XX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.


	255. A busy day

“I’m here!” Felicity almost shouted as she ran into the lobby, right to where Oliver, Alex and Thea were standing together. She came to a slithering stop, holding onto Oliver’s bicep for balance. Panting heavily, she added, “I’m here and I am almost in time. I know we were supposed to meet three minutes ago, but three minutes late is still like almost in time given I had to get all the way here and the traffic has been hell. By the way and in my defense-”

Felicity’s babbling was interrupted when Oliver captured her lips in a gentle kiss. His hands took hold of her hips and tugged her closer, so her chest was pressed against his. Felicity sighed, letting the warmth of his body and the gentleness of his kiss calm her down.

“You are not under attack,” Oliver whispered into her ear and kissed her cheek, “so there is no reason to defend yourself.”

“Yeah, well, but I would have been in time if it hadn’t been for-“

“You really don’t have to excuse yourself,” Oliver told her with a chuckle. He laced his fingers with hers and pulled her with him towards the stairs. “I am glad you could find the time to come.”

Felicity smiled with relief. Of course she hadn’t thought that Oliver would be angry with her. He would never be angry with her about something like this, especially since he had emphasized again and again that she really didn’t have to come to all of his appointments for him to know that she supported him and his candidacy. Yet, Felicity wanted to give him what he had given her during the last year, all her support and all the encouragement she had to give. Besides, being late to a joint interview would mean being late to her own appointment and, unlike Oliver, she didn’t have a reputation of always running late.

“Of course,” Felicity replied quickly, putting on a smile. “I really wanted to be in time, but my day has been a complete mess. First, Emily was sick and the guy from the IT department they sent me to help out was a terrible replacement. Like, I get he barely ever must step in for Emily, so it’s not like he is used to that kind of work, but I think being polite when talking to people on the phone should be a basic thing every human being learns as a child. Thank God, Emily always plans her vacation thoroughly, so I got most things handled without her when she is away, and she is barely ever sick. Then Curtis and I might have been too caught up in our work and almost got the building exploded. And the absolute highlight today is that someone ate that delicious food you cooked for me. I was starving and had to use my lunch break to get something to eat and then scarf it down in just a few minutes. I actually got stomach cramps from it.”

“What?” Oliver asked halfway down the stairs, looking at her with a mixture of shock, worry and confusion.

“Yes, it’s been terrible, but it passed,” Felicity replied, her voice not hiding how indignant she was. “What the hell is wrong with people that they steal someone else’s food? Like, you made that meal for me. I have been aching to eat it all day. It’s been like forever I got to eat beef with broccoli and rice and I really wanted it and-“

“No, not that,” Oliver interrupted her and shook his head. “What you said before that.”

“Oh, that IT-guy.” Felicity chuckled. “It’s ridiculous, you know? I really have to find a second assistant for the times that Emily isn’t there. I hate when she’s not there because she just knows me so well and-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her, coming to stop at the top of the stairs and holding onto her hand to make her stop too. “That is not what I meant, either.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue and puckered her lips for a moment before she grinned innocently. “I have no idea what you are talking about then.”

“The thing between these two,” Oliver replied, perking up his eyebrows expectantly.

“I said something between those?” Felicity asked, playing with the tip of her ponytail. “I think I don’t remember.”

“I am going to jog your memory then,” Oliver suggested. “You and Curtis almost got the building blown up?”

“Oh, that!” Felicity chuckled. “Yeah, that was funny.”

Oliver’s eyebrows rose even more and he crossed his arms in front of his chest, dipping his head forward a little. Felicity pressed her lips together and rolled them into her mouth. She just looked at Oliver, waiting for him to roll his eyes with a sigh and let it go. She shot a short look to Alex and Thea, who had followed them, hoping they would point out that they needed to get prepared for their interview, but the two seemed relaxed. Thea was even smiling amusedly.

Felicity groaned. “The building didn’t explode, so can’t we just go over that?”

“How about no?” Oliver asked back. When Felicity groaned once more, Oliver shook his head and frowned. “What happened?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “We thought we had found a solution to the problem we ran into when developing the hardware for our new project. Unfortunately, we might have been so excited about the idea that… yeah… we almost got the building exploded. Good news is that we realized it soon enough and nothing happened.”

“Only that you almost exploded.”

“Almost, exactly. I knew you would understand.”

Felicity chuckled even though Oliver didn’t exactly look amused. He looked tense, his thumb rubbing against his other fingertips. She had debated with herself whether or not to tell Oliver about this before the interview as well as whether or not to tell Oliver at all. She knew things like that worried him. She didn’t get into danger like that often since neither her daytime job nor her nighttime job, both usually behind computers, was really dangerous. When something happened, it seemed to be even worse for him, though.

With a sigh, Felicity stepped closer and put her hands to his forearms. “I am fine. Nothing happened.”

Oliver nodded slowly before he put his arms around her waist and pulled her against him. Felicity snuggled her cheek to his chest and closed her eyes for a moment. She knew how much he needed to hold her after a moment like that. Even though he hadn’t been present when the danger had been upon her, he could feel the consequences this could have had in every cell of his body. Felicity understood. The moment of shock when she had realized what they were about to do had been quite the wakeup-call.

If it wasn’t for their promise to always be honest with each other, Felicity maybe wouldn’t have told him about it. It wasn’t like it was a big deal since she and Curtis had realized their mistakes soon enough. Nobody had gotten heard and everything was alright. She knew those were things Oliver wanted to know, though.

“Promise me to be more careful the next time,” Oliver whispered against her hair.

Felicity nodded and angled her head back to look at him with a smile. “Promise.”

A quiet clearing of throat made Felicity turn her head to see Alex taking a step towards them. “I am sorry, but you still have to change and get your hair and makeup done and we should go through some questions and stuff.”

Oliver kissed the top of her head before he took in a deep breath and let go of her enough to move his hand through his short hair and say, “And I thought my hair was already perfect.”

Felicity chuckled and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to peck his lips. “It is.”

Hand in hand, they walked over to the office they had converted into their dressing and makeup room for the day. Felicity still felt like doing the interview about Oliver and his family in the exhibition premises of the Robert Queen Applied Science Center had been a good idea though she had almost been a little surprised that Alex had agreed with her on that. It was still part of QI after all.

In the converted office, a small team of hair and makeup artists were waiting for them as well as the clothes they had picked for the interview. Oliver had chosen a light grey suit with a vest and a blue tie that matched his eyes because Felicity had recommended it. She had asked what she was supposed to wear, but Oliver had just told her she could wear whatever she felt comfortable in which hadn’t really helped. Of course, Felicity knew he had only meant to tell her that he didn’t need her to dress up for the interview and wanted her to wear whatever she wanted, but he just hadn’t been any help with the decision so she had invited Thea over to help her picking out something. Felicity’s first suggesting had been a yellow off-shoulder top and a black skirt, but Thea had suggested something a little bit different, so together they had decided on a dark blue, tightfitting dress with sleeves. It matched Oliver’s style perfectly and would look great in the exhibition premises that were mostly made of concrete, glass and metal.

While three stylists worked on her hair and makeup, Felicity listened to Alex. He had made a list with subjects – starting with Oliver’s past as a spoilt little brat as he called it over his mysterious five years away to his parents’ role in the Undertaking – they should either avoid or stick to the answers he and Oliver had worked out together. He reminded Oliver of some subjects he should definitely address that would already allow the viewers to get a foretaste on his political program. Felicity listened closely, trying to memorize everything, so she could perfectly support Oliver.

Once hair and makeup had been done and there was nothing else to prepare for the interview, they headed to the exhibition premises where the reporter and the camera team were already waiting. Halfway down there, Thea pushed between Oliver and Felicity until their entwined fingers let go of each other and she could link arms with the two of them.

“How are you feeling?” Felicity asked her sister-in-law, knowing she was quite nervous about becoming a mom even if there were still almost three months separating her from her baby’s birth. “Still suffering from insomnia?”

“A little,” Thea confessed, “but it’s already getting better.”

“A hot mug of milk helped me, at least sometimes,” Felicity explained. “Maybe you should try that, too.”

“Well, Roy has great ways of tiring me out and helping me burn calories at the same time,” Thea replied with a smug smirk, “and I don’t even have to leave the bed.”

“Thea,” Oliver whispered, his body almost a little tense, “there are things I really don’t want to hear my baby sister say.”

Felicity chuckled, squeezing Thea’s hand. “Poor Oliver, he just can’t believe he is not the only one having an amazing sex life.”

“Ugh,” Thea made, screwing up her face the same way Oliver had. “I already know too much about your sex life as it is, so please not more of that crap.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “It’s so obvious you two are siblings.”

Thea and Oliver looked at each other for a moment like they were checking each other for similarities. Felicity chuckled, though. Maybe the two of them didn’t know it, but they were as similar as two siblings could be.

“Anyway,” Thea said after a moment, “at least my insomnia is giving me the time I need to prepare more thoroughly for everything. I got to tease her name out of Alex and did some research.”

“Oh, you did research,” Felicity repeated.

Thea grinned. “I have a really cool sister-in-law, who knows a lot about research and she might have taught me a few things about it.”

“I would love to hear more,” Felicity replied, “but I really want to know about that reporter.”

“Well, her name is-“

Thea was interrupted when they reached the bottom of the stairs that led right to the exhibition premises and brunette woman with slightly edgy face stepped in front of them. The smile on her lips had something unlikable, arrogant and cold. Everything about that woman screamed that Felicity wouldn’t like her. She had to suppress a sigh as she knew it wasn’t really a nice thing to even just think something like that when just getting to meet someone, but Felicity couldn’t help herself. She just knew.

“Mr. Queen,” the woman in front of them said, her voice almost boldly seductive given Felicity was standing right next to him. She held out her hand and Oliver shook it. “Susan Williams.”

“Nice to meet you,” Oliver replied, his voice reserved. “This is my sister Thea and my wife Felicity.”

Ms. Williams shook Thea’s hand, shooting her a polite smile, before she turned to Felicity. The reporter took a close look at Felicity, scrutinizing her from her hair roots to her toes. There was something triumphant about the way she looked at Felicity eventually. She couldn’t say why, but Felicity felt uncomfortable about it in some way. She was used to being looked at that way by women of Oliver’s past, women he had been with and women who had been denied their dream of a night with him. They saw her and wondered what he saw in her, given she didn’t exactly look like the model-type kind of girl he had been with before. Being looked at like that by a woman neither she nor Oliver had ever met and who was about to receive a very exclusive and intimate look into their lives, gave Felicity a weird feeling.

“Mrs. Queen,” she said. “I have heard a lot about you.”

_Well, I have never heard about you._ Felicity swallowed down the words before they could leave her lips. As much as she would love to say them, she knew it wouldn’t be a good start. They needed that woman on their sides to get a good story.

“That is nice to hear,” she replied and shook Ms. Williams’ hand.

“Now, if you are ready, we can get started already,” Ms. Williams suggested, gesturing to the middle of the room where a couch and an armchair were waiting for them with three cameras directed at them. “We are fully prepared.”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Thea suggested. She squeezed Oliver’s and Felicity’s hand before leaving their sides, explaining, “Alex and I will stay close and watch.”

“Hey, could you take my phone?” Felicity asked Thea, holding her back from leaving too far. “In case Raisa calls because something is wrong with the kids-“

“I am going to take care of it,” Thea promised, taking the phone Felicity held out for her. Just moving her lips without releasing a sound, she added, “Good luck.”

Ms. Williams led Felicity and Oliver to the couch and gestured for them to sit down. Felicity sat down first and just slid a little closer to Oliver, so she could almost lean into his side. His fingers sought hers out nervously and entwined with them. Their hands rested on her lap and Felicity stroked her thumb over the back of his hand.

Felicity watched Ms. Williams sitting down in the armchair and grabbing the moderation cards from the small table next to it. She skimmed the first card before she lifted her gaze again. She smiled or smirked. Felicity couldn’t say. There was just something about her that Felicity just couldn’t take to.

“Are you ready?” she asked.

Oliver shot a brief look at Felicity and only when she smiled affirmatively, he turned back to Ms. Williams and nodded. “We are.”

Ms. Williams smiled. “Great. We will just start directly with the questions, just so you know.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Fine.”

“I don’t mind,” Felicity added.

“Perfect.” Ms. Williams’ smile widened, turning even more triumphant. She nodded to the camera guys. “Here we go.”

 

 

Felicity was almost surprised how great the interview with Susan Williams was going. After those terribly triumphant smiles, Felicity had thought her first question would be why he had spent time in Hongkong and Russia during those famous five years away, followed directly by a question about his secret alter-ego, the Arrow. Instead, she asked about Oliver’s past before and after the island, his political goals and their family life.

It was actually easy to answer her questions, almost a little bit too easy. At least it was so easy that Felicity wondered if Susan Williams was even trying to get an interesting story here. Her questions were standard, questions she and Oliver had gone through to prepare themselves for the interview and talk about how much they were going to tell and what to keep for themselves. Maybe Alex had overestimated Ms. Williams’ potential. She seemed quite average, but it was easy to say for Felicity since she knew every single one of Oliver’s secret. She knew what questions she had to ask if she wanted a good story.

“Mr. Queen, obviously family is very important to you,” Ms. Williams stated after some time like it hadn’t been obvious enough so far. “Yet, you want to take on the duties of taking care of this city. How do you balance these aspects of your life?”

“Felicity and I have a lot of understanding for each other,” Oliver replied, squeezing Felicity’s hand.

She turned her head to look at his face and smiled proudly. He had been handling this interview perfectly in her mind. Ms. Williams hadn’t made it particularly hard, but that didn’t mean Felicity couldn’t appreciate Oliver’s integrity nonetheless. She hadn’t thought he’d feel so comfortable in front of the cameras. He wasn’t just playing down his tension. He was actually open about this. Felicity knew him too well to let herself be fooled.

“For Felicity and me, our kids will always be our priorities,” Oliver continued after a moment, “but that doesn’t mean that we aren’t taking other duties seriously. Over the last years, Felicity managed to completely reinvent the company my parents built from scratch and yet she found the time to initiate new charity project through our family’s foundation and all of that on top of two pregnancies with all the ups and downs it put her through, especially the pregnancy depression, and the kids we had already. I have always been amazed by what she is doing and how she is going is. I think it is very inspiring. I know how she gets to find this balance, so I hope I will find my own way to do the same.”

At some point during his answer, he had turned his head and locked eyes with Felicity. There was a content smile playing on his lips and it made Felicity’s stomach flutter almost as much as his lips did when he kissed her. As much as he was amazed by how many things she managed at the daily basis, Felicity would never stop being amazed by how many words he found to compliment her.

“Mrs. Smoak, what is your secret recipe to manage all these things and what advice would you give your husband?”

Felicity released a brief chuckle and shrugged her shoulders, answering, “I think I am just lucky enough that I have an amazing team at QI and I have wonderful kids. Most importantly, Oliver’s support is what is helping me, though. I doubt that I could lead the company the way I did if it wasn’t for him. He always has my back. The only advice I can give him is to lean on me the way I always knew I could lean on him.”

“Yet, with the both of you in very time-consuming jobs, how do you continue maintaining your family life?”

There was a moment of hesitation. Ms. Williams had looked at Felicity only shortly, but Felicity didn’t like the vibes she felt she received.

“I am working from home a little more,” Felicity replied when Oliver didn’t answer. “I always wanted to do so, especially since Oliver built a wonderful home office for me, but I never really got to do it. Out of habit, I often went back to the QI building. Now, this has been the final push to use my home office more. I think the first days also gave me a good insight on what technical features are still necessary to make working from home even easier, so it’s been even inspiring me for some new projects.”

“We know that it’s a lot of responsibility,” Oliver added now, squeezing her hand in silent thanks. “It’s one of the first things we talked about when I got this idea. As much as I love this city, I think if I didn’t know that my family was okay with it and that they are taken care of, I couldn’t do it. I was a lot more worried about it than Felicity because she always sees the best in everything and is a very optimistic person. When I told her that I wanted to get engaged in the politics, she said I had her full support and we’d find solutions for everything else.”

“And she was right?”

Oliver chuckled. “Felicity always is. She actually surprised me with a solution I was almost embarrassed I didn’t have myself. She brought in the woman that already helped raising me and my little sister. She is family to me, always has been, and I am more than happy that she is taking care of my kids now the way she took care of my sister and me before.”

“So, running for mayor is not opposed to prioritizing your family?” Ms. William asked. “When you ran for mayor four years ago, you renounced your candidacy because your family was your priority. You even stated your disappointment about not receiving the city’s support in a for you personally challenging time. What changed that made you decide to try once more?”

Felicity had trouble holding back a sigh. Maybe Ms. Williams should think about a job change if she wanted to make it this easy for them. Like, she was almost handing them the perfect things to say. Felicity didn’t mind things being easy for her, but hadn’t Alex said it shouldn’t be too easy?

“I changed,” Oliver replied in the meantime. “When I ran for mayor four years ago, my heart wasn’t fully in it. Now that’s different, though. I am in it with all my heart and I think I matured even more and found more contentment. I know my family is being taken care of and whatever people say about me or about us doesn’t matter.”

“There will always be rumors,” Felicity added. “Gossip magazines just like to make up stories. We have gotten used it.”

“Like the rumors about what kind of relationship you have with Ray Palmer?”

Felicity could feel Oliver tense. If there were subjects he didn’t want to think about, this was definitely one of them. It didn’t matter that he knew none of those rumors were true or how much he trusted her, it was a sore spot. Admittedly, Felicity would feel the same if there was the rumor that Oliver had fathered a child with another woman during their marriage and there would be rumors about him and that woman being together again and again. Oliver didn’t freak out every time that rumor came up anymore, but it still bothered him. There was no way a person couldn’t be bothered by that.

“I think it’s almost funny how that rumor always comes back around,” Felicity replied with a chuckle and rolled her eyes. “Ray and I have been together for a few weeks years ago. It was never really serious. We might be the perfect match on paper, but there are no more than romantic feelings between us. We were working together, we were both singles and tried, but it just wasn’t right and we both realized that early on. We are still friends now and I think one of the reasons for that is that there was never any spark between us. People make a lot more of these few weeks than there really was.”

“Yet-“

“I think Felicity made clear that-“

“I think the media just wants to make a scandal out of everything,” Felicity quickly took over before Oliver could say something he would regret later. “Things around Oliver and me have been quiet for years because we are living a rather eventless suburban family life than the life of a high society family, so they go back to that old story again and again. They could really try and come up with something new. There are so many stories reporters could make up, but they always stick to that story though I haven’t even seen Ray in quite some time now. It’s kind of uncreative.”

Ms. William’s triumphant smile faltered for a moment. From the corner of her eye, Felicity could see Thea holding back an amused outburst of laughter. Felicity would love to add that bringing that story up again and again was so not original, but she guessed her answer had been passive-aggressive enough as it was. Really, though, why did reporters come with that old story again and again? At this point, Felicity felt it would be original if they asked about Bruce instead of Ray.

“Third parties interrupting seems to be a recurring theme in your marriage, though.” Ms. Williams refused to let go. “You are both known to spend a lot of time with your exes, especially Ray Palmer and Laurel Lance.”

“They are friends,” Oliver replied monosyllabically. “That’s it.”

“Oliver and I trust each other, so there is no reason to avoid people we have been with in the past,” Felicity added and squeezed Oliver’s hand, silently pleading him not to get back a hold on himself. “There is no room for third parties in our marriage.”

“In your past, third parties weren’t problems for your relationships,” Ms. William said, turning more to Oliver again. “You have been in a romantic relationship with Laurel Lance before your father’s boat went down. Yet, it was her younger sister Sara Lance who was with you on that boat.”

“I… uhm…” Oliver searched for the right words, but didn’t seem to find them immediately. He had to swallow before he cleared his throat and explained, “I made a lot of mistakes when I was younger. I earned forgiveness and evolved. I am better than that now. Cheating is not something I’d do again now.”

“With your candidacy, your market value is once more rising, though,” Ms. William continued. “A lot of women will be attracted to you even more given the power that will complete the wonderful package of handsomeness and money you have already. You are being called Mayor Handsome for a reason.”

“Yeah, I would have gone with Mayor McDreamy or Mayor McSexy inspired by Grey’s Anatomy, you know?” Felicity replied, trying to lighten the mood or at least give Oliver some time to gather himself. Ms. Williams was rubbing this subject in with all her questions and Felicity almost feared Oliver would snap eventually. “I think Derek Shepherd and Mark Sloan aren’t only dreamily handsome and sexy, they are also really great at their jobs and that is something that I want people to know. Nobody can deny that Oliver is handsome, but he’s a lot more than the pretty face.”

Ms. Williams pressed her lips together for a moment, obviously considering asking one more question. Luckily, one of the crew members tapped his finger against his watch, wordlessly telling her to come to an end.

“So, my last question,” she said, her voice sourly. “We have talked a lot about your jobs and your children now. You said before that you are still trying to find your way to balance these different facets of your life. How does your marriage, time for just the two of you together, fit into that?”

“We are a family,” Oliver took now over again. “We love hanging out with our kids, but you are right. Sometimes, it’s nice to have some time for just the two of us. We have a wonderful family to lean on, who helps giving us the room we need at times. Of course, sometimes it’s hard and there is little to no time for just the two of us, but we are always pulling through and enjoy just the little moments when the kids are in bed and it’s just the two of us. Felicity is easily the most important person in my life and spending time together, whether it’s with the entire family or just the two of us, is an important thing for me that I will always make time for.”

Ms. Williams didn’t seem satisfied with the answer, but she knew her time was up. She ended the interview with a few words of thanks. As soon as the guy behind the first camera told her they were switched off, she excused herself and went over to them.

Felicity turned to Oliver. “What about us? Are we heading home? I am terribly tired.”

Oliver smiled. “Give me a few minutes to talk to Alex.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “I’ll go change already.”

Oliver nodded and lowered his head to kiss the soft spot under her ear and whisper, “Thank you.”

Felicity smiled, stroking her hands over his chest. “Always.”

When Felicity headed back to the stairs, Thea hurried towards her and linked her arm with Felicity’s. She smiled at her sister-in-law.

“Happy with our performance?” Felicity asked.

“You’ve been great,” Thea replied. “It was the perfect mixture of privacy and professionalism, all wrapped up in an atmosphere of love and being close.”

“Yeah, she made it easy,” Felicity whispered back, shooting a look over her shoulder where Susan Williams was talking to Alex and Oliver now. “At the end, she got annoying, though.”

“She was arrogant, but she knew exactly what buttons to push.” Thea nodded. “Dragon Lady seemed to be more into simple trash talk than a really good story. You were absolutely right with what you said. Her originality is nonexisting.”

Felicity chuckled. “I couldn’t hold myself back with that.”

 

 

“Felicity?” Oliver whispered. “It’s time to wake up, hon.”

Felicity sighed sleepily and stretched out her arms and leg. A long yawn left her lips. The eventful day had made her tired, so she must have fallen asleep on their way back home. When Felicity opened her eyes, she frowned.

“We aren’t home,” she stated.

“I love how smart you are,” Oliver teased her. “It’s amazing.”

He leaned over to kiss her temple and got out of the car. He walked around to her side and opened the door for her. While Felicity was unbuckling her seatbelt, Oliver took off her high heels. He held out his hand for her to take then. With a smile, she entwined her fingers with his and got out. She sighed contently at the feeling of the warm sand under her feet.

“Why are we at the beach house?” Felicity asked. “Not that I mind.”

Oliver chuckled. He snuggled up to her back, leaning his cheek against hers. They started walking forward, closer to the water. With the way he was pressed to her back, his feet between hers, it was hard no stumbling. Felicity enjoyed it and just chuckled happily, though. When they reached the water, their feet getting wet, Felicity sighed contently and leaned her head back against Oliver’s shoulder, closing her eyes.

“Raisa brought us sandwiches and the self-made lemonade you like so much,” Oliver whispered, his lips brushing against the lobe of her ear as he spoke. “She and Donna are taking care of the kids, so we can have a little time just for ourselves. Just you and me.”

“I like that.”

Felicity sighed contently. She leaned back against Oliver more, letting him carry her weight. Not saying a word, they just looked at the ocean and enjoyed the quiet between them. They weren’t spending enough time here Felicity thought to herself. It was a beautiful place and she had spent wonderful hours here. Oliver had even proposed to her here, the planned second proposal, not the first in the bed.

Eventually, Felicity turned around, though. She wrapped her arms around Oliver’s waist and looked at him. There was contentment on his face, a quiet smile giving away how much he enjoyed being here with her. Years ago, the sound of the waves crashing would have made him nervous, reminding him of those terrible days back on Lian Yu.

“What is this about?” Felicity asked. “Dragon Lady’s questions?”

Oliver chuckled, perking up his eyebrows. “Dragon Lady?”

“Your sister nicknamed her, not me,” Felicity replied with an innocent smile, “but I am all in with that nickname.”

Again, Oliver chuckled. He looked at the sky for a moment before he lowered his gaze to Felicity’s face again. Their eyes locked.

“It’s not about the interview. It’s not about what you told me about you and Curtis almost blowing up the building either. Not really,” Oliver explained. He shrugged his shoulders. “We didn’t have much time for just the two of us in the last weeks. I felt it was time to catch up on that.”

“We just need get used to our new rhythm,” Felicity replied. “Once we have, it’s going to be easier and we will find more time for just the two of us.”

Oliver sighed and stroked his hands over her hair. He kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose and finally her lips. Sighing, Felicity straightened up to the tip of her toes and responded to the kiss. When their lips parted, Felicity leaned her head back. Her hand moved from his back to his chest, stroking up and down.

“You know, if it’s supposed to be just you and me, then these need to go,” Felicity replied and tugged at the fabric of his shirt while sneaking her other hand under the waistband of his pants, spreading her fingers against his butt. “We don’t want any company, right?”

“Well, as I said in the interview before, my wife is always right.” There was a glint in Oliver’s eyes. He pulled back enough to take off his shirt and let it drop into the sand. His fingers snuck to the back of her neck and pulled down the zipper of her dress. “Same rule goes for your clothing, though.”

“Well, if you say so,” Felicity replied, straightening up onto the tip of her toes once more to nuzzled Oliver’s nose, “maybe you should take it off me.”

Oliver smirked and whispered against her lips, “Already at it.”

The next second, he captured her lips with his, stealing a hot kiss from her. Felicity sighed, pressing herself closer to him. She wrapped a leg around his waist, opening herself to him. Oliver moaned into her mouth and pushed his hands under her knees, lifting her against him easily.

“Time to get rid of everything we don’t need,” he whispered against her lips and started carrying her over to the house. “I think your panties are the next thing that are in the way.”

“They are?”

“Oh yes,” Oliver mumbled. “I feel they will be in the way my lips and tongue intend to take.”

Felicity moaned, her legs tightening around Oliver’s waist. This was going to be a very good night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started writing the angst storyline late yesterday night. That means I have to chapters for the next week and decide when to start posting the following angst/drama storyline once I know how good/bad writing is going. I don't want you to be forced to wait too long. ;)
> 
> Teaser for the next chapter: It’s time for the return of XXX XXXXX XXXXX.


	256. Unspoken invitation

“What are you wearing?”

Felicity looked at the phone in her hand for a moment like it would see her confused reaction and start laughing at her. She had been so focused on the report she had received from Wayne Enterprise this morning, that she hadn’t even realized she had taken an incoming call until the question had startled her from her thought. It took another moment for her to gather herself enough to check the call detection. She chuckled and rolled her eyes when she realized who was calling her.

“Bruce.”

“Ha! I wish you were wearing me,” Bruce replied, “because I’d look very good on you.”

Felicity rolled her eyes once more. “In your dreams, Bruce. In your dreams.”

“Those are wonderful dreams,” Bruce told her. “Anyway, you didn’t answer the question.”

“And I am not going to.” Felicity chuckled. “Besides, I am at work. What do you think I am wearing?”

“Well, if I got to choose, I’d go with the floral pleated skirt and the black top with the long sleeves. You know, the one with the deep neckline and the knot at the front, so there was a thin stripe of skin exposed between top and skirt. You wore it to our dinner when you have been in Gotham the last time. Maybe some black and yellow lingerie for under your clothes.”

Felicity was speechless for a moment before she shook her head and chuckled. “For a second, I wondered if I should be scared that you remember it this thoroughly or amused that you are such a fashionista. We should go shopping the next time we see each other.”

“Hey, if we are gonna get to have some fun in the changing rooms, I’m in,” Bruce replied. “We could play out fantasies.”

Felicity could imagine exactly what Bruce looked like in this moment. He was probably sitting leaned back in his leather chair, his feet on the desk. He was holding a glass of Scotch in his hand, swirling it while watching the golden liquid. He had taken off the jacket of his suit, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to expose his strong arms. There was no denying that he was attractive the way she imagined him, but Bruce just was attractive by nature. According to a lot of magazines, he was the hottest bachelor.

“Sorry, Bruce, but that fantasy has already been played out.”

“Really?” he asked back, surprise evident in his voice.

“Really,” Felicity confirmed. She looked down at herself. “I am actually wearing the very same dress I bought when that happened.”

“No,” Bruce whined playfully. “You are not supposed to wear clothes that remind you of your boring husband when we are having phone sex.”

“We are not having phone sex.” Felicity looked at her engagement and wedding band on her hand, swirling both around her finger. “I am married, remember?”

“Well, I wouldn’t consider phone sex cheating,” Bruce explained to her matter-of-factly. “There are no touches, not even a kiss. It’s just two people talking to each other. It can hardly be called cheating.”

“Maybe in your world,” Felicity replied. “In mine, it definitely would be.”

“No exceptions?”

“No exceptions.” Felicity chuckled. “Besides, if there were exceptions, having phone sex with you would definitely not be one of them, no matter what.”

Felicity chuckled and leaned back in her chair. She was glad Bruce had called since she would have probably worked through her lunch break if he hadn’t snapped her out of work. It was weird how she was like an addict when she was at work, being all sucked up and unable to stop. Emily had taken her lunch break early today, probably because she was into that guy from their legal department and wanted to not-so-accidentally run into him during lunch. Usually, she was the one to remind her it was time for a break.

Eventually, Bruce cleared his throat. “Did you receive the report I mailed you this morning?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, straightening back up in her chair and turning to her computer. “I am actually going over it right now. It looks promising.”

“It is,” Bruce agreed. “I think we should meet up and talk about this. We had several business meetings, but we barely ever got to celebrate our success. Why don’t you come here for the weekend, we have some nice dinner and spend a fun weekend, celebrating our success now?”

“I would love that, but I can’t leave here right now,” Felicity replied honestly since going to Gotham was always fun, even if she missed her family whenever she was away from them. “Sorry.”

“Because of Oliver’s candidacy?”

“Among other reasons.” Felicity smiled, leaning back once more. “You know, I want to support Oliver in this, so I really don’t want to leave. That aside, the kids are still getting used to Raisa, so I don’t want to leave them for too long and make them think that Oliver and I won’t be there for them the way we have been before. Their lives have been turned upside down as much as possible for the moment.”

“And of course, you also don’t want to furnish Susan William a fit occasion to bring back the rumors of you being unfaithful?”

“Oh, you heard about that interview?” Felicity asked.

Bruce chuckled. “Of course. I watched it several times. You did pretty good considering she tried to come down on the two of you like a ton of bricks towards the end.”

“That woman is just terrible. Thea already nicknamed her Dragon Lady which I can only agree with,” Felicity told him. “I don’t really care what she thinks, but I also don’t want to give her any reasons for new rumors.”

“Well, luckily, you managed to keep the interview focused apart from that,” Bruce told her. “I know it’s the part that is replayed the most, but what you said about Oliver’s abilities and his devotion to the city, I think it was a great interview. Everyone who puts a little thought into it knows they tried to corner you and him.”

Felicity smiled. “Thanks, Bruce.”

“You’re welcome and if you need to get rid of the Dragon Lady, one call and I am in Starling.”

“I know you would, but I think it won’t be necessary. Just like I know you could comfortably get rid of her from your office,” Felicity replied. “All you would have to do is buy that news channel she is working for and every other channel she could work for. You didn’t actually have to come to Starling for that.”

Bruce sighed. “First you are rejecting my suggestion to come visit me here in Gotham and now you also don’t want me to come to Starling to see you. Felicity, love, this is not helping our case.”

“Awww, poor baby,” Felicity replied with a chuckle and rolled her eyes. For a moment she wondered how she could say this to Bruce so easily when she usually said it to Oliver when she was teasing him. She pushed that thought away though. Bruce was her friend, and a very good one of those actually, after all. “You always seem to forget that I am happily married.”

“Technically, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t have some fun otherwise.”

“It does for me.”

Bruce sighed. “I know. You are missing out on something great, you little, romantic buttercup.”

“I think that is something I can and must live with.” Felicity Smiley for a moment before she cleared her throat.  “Hey, since you called, can I ask you something about the report?”

“Sure,” Bruce replied, “though I would wish you’d ask me something a little more intimate instead.”

Felicity shook her head with an amused smile. She put Bruce on speakerphone and scrolled through the report to the passage she had wanted to talk about with Bruce. Before she could find it, there was a quiet knock at the door, though.

“Hey.”

Felicity looked up immediately, a wide smile spreading on her lips when she saw Oliver. He leaned in the frame of the open door, one hand pushed into the pocket of his jeans. He looked at her almost with a little bit of hesitation, his bottom lip pulled into his mouth slightly. He pointed at himself and then into the office, wordlessly asking if he could come in, and Felicity nodded quickly.

“Bruce, I am going to call you back later, okay?”

“What? Why?” he asked. “You wanted to ask a question and I thought we were going to go back to the wonderful start of our fist phone sex.“

“I am sure Felicity has better and much more fun stuff to do,” Oliver replied.

“Oliver.” Even without seeing Bruce, she knew there was a smirk on his lips. “You of all people have to keep Felicity from having some fun?”

“Oh, I think Felicity is going to have a lot more fun with me today than she could ever have with you,” Oliver replied, “so just give up on it Bruce.”

“Well, I could-“

“I am going to hang up now because a lady doesn’t like to sit around not getting any attention while two men are fighting who can offer her more fun.”

“Call me later and you can have the direct comparison,” Bruce suggested.

“Bye, Bruce.”

Felicity ended the call with a sigh, shaking her head slightly. She doubted that Oliver and Bruce would ever become friends. Even if it wasn’t for Bruce flirting with her all the time, the two were just too different. They might share their love for running around in leathers and tying people up, but that was it. While Oliver was enjoying a more or less quiet family life, Bruce was still embracing being a multi-billionaire and bachelor. Oliver loved cooking. Bruce loved tech. They were just very different and Felicity liked to take the best of both of them which she had with getting married to Oliver and making Bruce her business partner and friend.

Pushing those thoughts away, Felicity turned to Oliver. She got up from her chair and took the two steps to where Oliver was sitting on the edge of her desk, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Putting her hands to his forearms, Felicity straightened up onto the tip of her toes and kissed Oliver gently. It was a chaste kiss and Felicity broke it before Oliver could deepen it.

“What are you doing here?” she asked and shot a look to her empty anteroom. “Did you bring the kids?”

Oliver frowned. “No.”

“Oh my god, please don’t say I forgot an appointment,” Felicity hurried to say. Not waiting for an answer, she went back to her computer to check for any appointments she might have forgotten. “I know we wanted to talk to Alex about financing your campaign, but I am pretty sure that meeting is on Wednesday and it’s not Wednesday. It is Tuesday. Yeah, right here it says the meeting is Wednesday, so tomorrow. I didn’t forget.”

“No, you didn’t,” Oliver confirmed.

Felicity released a breath of relief, putting her hand to her chest. “Thank God. For a second, I thought I had messed up. Don’t you have that appointment with the photographer, though? For the election posters?”

“I postponed it to later today.”

“Why? Did something happen?”

“No,” Oliver replied quickly, shaking his head. He looked at her for a moment, scrutinizing her face, before he chuckled and moved his fingers through his hair almost a little embarrassedly. “I thought you had asked me to come here.”

“I didn’t.” Felicity frowned worriedly. “Did your phone get hacked? Should I take a look? Maybe it’s-“

“No, it’s not like that,” Oliver interrupted her.

He puckered his lips, looking her up and down. Felicity followed his gaze, looking at the dress and the shoes she wore. Neither screamed that she needed a visit from her husband during her lunchbreak, at least not to her. Felicity lifted her gaze again to find Oliver’s eyes already on her. She perked up her eyebrows, wordlessly asking what exactly had made him think she had invited her.

It wasn’t that she minded his surprising visit. At some point during their marriage, they had stopped showing up surprisingly at the other’s workplace, though, if it wasn’t for birthdays or to distract the kids when they were having a difficult day. They had been married too long for these little things to still make sense. They had other obligations. Besides, gathering at least three kids – as William wasn’t living with them permanently and Emmy was attending school – wasn’t exactly as easy as it had been when they had only had one or two kids.

“It’s about the dress you’re wearing,” Oliver told her.

Felicity frowned and looked at the dress again. It was a tightfitting dress. The color reminded of Oliver’s leathers which Felicity remembered had been one of the reasons she had bought it. The short sleeves accentuated her strong arms, the low neckline her cleavage. Given she had bought it like four years and two pregnancies ago, she had been more than impressed it had still fit when she had put it on this morning. Oliver was definitely making sure she was eating healthily and burning calories on a regular basis.

“What about that dress?” Felicity asked.

Oliver hesitated for a moment, puckering his lips before he wetted them with the tip of her tongue and smirked. “Do you remember when you bought it?”

A smirk spread on her lips now too. “Yes. I actually might have implied to Bruce how thoroughly I tried this dress on to make sure it fit some different occasions and not just for work.”

“In that case I really don’t understand how Bruce thinks he can beat the fun we have,” Oliver replied with a chuckle.

He crossed the bit of distance to her and pushed her chair aside. With his hands at her hips, he walked her backwards until her butt pressed against the edge of her desk. Without hesitation, he lifted her onto it. Felicity felt her heart skip a beat, a jolt of anticipation shooting right to her core. She spread her legs a little, so Oliver could step even closer to her. He put his hands to her knees and stroked them up and down her thighs over the thin silk stockings that reached high to her thighs.

Oliver leaned his head forward and kissed the side of her neck, making a wonderful shiver running down the length of her spine. Felicity sighed and angled her head to the side to give Oliver’s lips more room to do as they pleased. Oliver stepped even closer to her, putting his hands to the back of her knees to keep her against him. The front of his jeans pressed against where she was already feeling herself getting wet for him. Felicity closed her eyes, focusing on getting a grip on herself. Here and now wasn’t the right time to get turned on.

“Do you remember what you said to me after we had a little fun in the changing room?”

“Finally?”

With a chuckle, Oliver pulled away from her neck. His eyes sparked with amusement when he looked at her. He lifted his hands to her face and stroked the curls back behind her ears. His hands cupped her face gently then.

“The kids were exhausting at that time,” Oliver said quietly.

Felicity nodded. “You grumbled about going shopping all day because all you wanted was sex.”

“Good thing I got it.”

“We wouldn’t have made it home otherwise because I might have pushed you off a bridge on the way,” Felicity replied. She puckered her lips. “I have to admit you were still a great shopping aide.”

“I was,” Oliver agreed, “and I have been paid for it generously.”

Felicity chuckled. “I know sex is your favorite currency.”

“Kind of,” Oliver admitted shamelessly. “Anyway, back to what you said to me in that changing room. I think the _finally_ was obvious and didn’t have to be said. So, no, it wasn’t what you said.”

“Then fill me in,” Felicity suggested.

“Let me quote you,” Oliver said and puckered his lip a little bit, moving his finger from her collarbone down to the neckline of her dress and following it over the top of Felicity’s breasts. Goosebumps spread all over her skin. “ _By the way, whenever I wear this dress for work that will be the unspoken invitation for you to come by and take me in my office_. That is when you put on this dress this morning-”

“You thought I was inviting you over for an office quickie.”

Oliver pressed his lips together and nodded while Felicity was pulling her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it. With a chuckle, Oliver pecked her lips and lowered his hands back to her knees.

“Now the question is what we do with this signal that I misinterpreted,” Oliver said, tugging at the hem of her dress a little. “I mean… now that I am here…”

Felicity grinned amusedly before she puckered her lip and shot a look at her watch. “Emily usually comes back from her lunch break in fifteen minutes. If that’s enough for you…”

“Is that a challenge, Mrs. Queen?”

“What if it is?”

“Then I guess all I can say is challenge accepted.”

Their eyes stayed locked for another moment, sealing the decision they had just made. They moved at the same time, their lips meeting in a desperate kiss. Oliver slipped his tongue into her mouth, his teeth scraping against her bottom lip. Felicity groaned, putting her arms around his neck and pulling him closer to her. His hips were rubbing against her, the zipper pressing against her folds and her clit.

When his lips parted from hers, Felicity groaned. She tried to chase his lips, her arms tightening around his neck to pull him back closer to her. Oliver took a tiny step away, though. He pushed the hem of her dress further up until it pooled around her waist. He stroked his hands from her hips high between her thighs. His fingertips followed the selvage of her stockings, his pinkies grazing her folds. She felt her skin starting to tingle at his touch.

Felicity was about to remind him that quickies were supposed to be quick and there was no time for stroking each other’s bodies like that. Her complaint fell silent when Oliver’s fingers hooked under the selvages of her stockings. He pulled them down her legs to her feet, then took of her shoes, so he could get rid of the stockings completely. He lifted his fingers back to her hips to hook into the waistband of her panties and tugged them down too. Without a word, just a brief look into her eyes that gave away how desperate he was for this, Oliver went down on his knees in front of her.

“Oh God,” Felicity sighed though Oliver hadn’t even touched her yet.

“Lean back,” Oliver ordered, his voice husky and soft.

Felicity did as he said, lying back on the table. She knew he wanted her to be perfectly ready before he’d enter her and make her come with quick and hard thrusts. He lifted her legs over his shoulders and put his arms onto her hips to keep her from moving. For a long moment – a moment that Felicity wondered if they were really having sex in her office that was surrounded by glass and then decided that she would have to trust Oliver’s super-senses to notice soon enough if they were about to get interrupted – Oliver just stayed where he was without getting closer. His warm breath ghosted over her wet folds, increasing Felicity’s arousal.

When Oliver finally closed the distance between his lips and where she was aching for him, Felicity released a long moan. His lips closed around her clit, the tip of his tongue rubbing back and forth over the sensitive nubbin repeatedly. Every now and then, he alternated the rubbing motion with a circling one.

Felicity’s thighs were pressing together on their own will like they wanted to keep Oliver’s head right where he was buried between her legs. Oliver’s stubbled scratched the inside of her thighs. The heels of her feet pressed into his back, anchoring herself to him. She was breathing heavily. Her fingernails dug into the skin of Oliver’s forearms as it was the only thing she could do to express how good he was making her feel.

It wasn’t long until Felicity felt like her nerve endings had been set on fire, her body so sensitive to each of Oliver’s touches, she knew she wasn’t far from getting into a state of oversensitivity. It was a terrible state when she was past the peak of her pleasure and whatever Oliver did leaned more to the side of pain than pleasure, making it unable to continue. It didn’t happen often unless they were trying to move things a long a little more quickly than her clit was comfortable with.

Knowing it was time to move on to the next step, one that relieved her clit from the responsibility of making this quickie good for both of them, Felicity put her feet onto Oliver’s shoulders and pushed him away carefully. Oliver got the hint and immediately pulled away. He wiped his mouth with his forearm quickly as he straightened up. His eyes found hers, wordlessly asking if they had passed the point of pleasure or they could keep going. Felicity didn’t need words to answer. She sat up on the desk and hooked her fingers into the waistband of his jeans to pull him back against her. Their lips met in a hungry kiss while Felicity was unbuckling his belt, undoing the button and lowering the zipper. Without any hesitance, she tugged down his jeans and boxers and took hold of his erection.

“Felicity,” Oliver hissed in response, his lips breaking away from hers.

Felicity smirked at Oliver, watching the changes of his face when he watched the movements of her fingers. She tightened her hold on his erection before stroking her fingers over she soft skin that covered his hardness. She moved them to his tip, swirling her tongue around the tip of his cock. Oliver groaned, his eyes closing, and he thrust into her hand.

When Felicity squeezed his length in her hand, Oliver growled. He pushed her hand away, taking a step towards her and lining the tip of his cock up with her entrance. When he started easing inside, Felicity leaned her head back and locked eyes with Oliver. His pupils were blown wide, his lips opened in quiet pants. While Oliver continued thrusting in, Felicity grabbed his biceps and held onto it.

Once he was seated inside of her, grabbed her knees and pulled her more to the edge of the desk. He leaned his chest forward then, pressing against Felicity’s until her back rested against the top of the desk, covered by his body. Their eyes stayed locked on each other. For a long moment, they just forgot that this was a quickie and they could get caught at any time. They looked at each other, enjoying the intimacy of the moment.

It didn’t take too long until Oliver’s lips met hers in a heated kiss, his hips starting to thrust. It started out with slow, firm thrusts. Soon, they grew quicker and shorter, though. He didn’t pull out far before he already pushed back in again. His hips moved quickly, his cock sliding back and forth between her slick walls in a way that created a wonderful friction. Felicity wrapped her legs around his hips, making him go deeper.

Oliver had worked her up so well that it didn’t take much for her to feel the strings of pleasure pulling at her. Her heart was pounding against her ribs, her skin hot and tingling. Her breathing was erratic, their kisses growing sloppy in result. She could feel in the way Oliver’s body tensed more and more with each thrust and the way his fingers dug deeper into her thighs that he was close too.

“Are you-?”

“Yes,” Felicity whispered.

He tightened his grip on her thighs even more, pulling her impossibly close against him. The movements of his hips became even quicker and harder, making Felicity’s ass press against the edge of her desk. When Felicity felt the familiar tingling in the tip of her toes that told her that she was right on the edge, she tightened her legs around Oliver, keeping him trapped there though she doubted he had any intention to leave if his desperate thrusts didn’t betray her. She used the hold on his body to thrust against him, lifting her hips from the desk a little whenever Oliver’s hips snapped against hers.

Just a couple of thrusts later, Felicity was coming. The tingling feeling spread all through her. Her body spasmed, her nails grabbing his biceps even more tightly. Loud moan would leave her lips if it wasn’t for Oliver, who swallowed every sound.

While wave after wave of pleasure rushed through her, Oliver chased his own release. He thrust more quickly. When his hips started stuttering, his movements losing finesse, Oliver lowered his head and tugged the neckline of her dress down with his chin. Only when his lips could reach a spot of her skin that would be hidden by the dress as soon as Felicity tugged her clothes back into place, he closed his lips around it. He bit down on her tender skin gently before he started sucking. His hips stuttered even more until he came with one more hard thrust, burying himself inside of her so deep it took Felicity’s breath away and made another small orgasm run through her body.

Slowly, Oliver’s body loosened tension. Releasing a long sigh, he let go of her skin where he had certainly left a hickey. His stubbled cheek scratched over the still exposed skin of her chest until his ear came to rest on top of her heart. Felicity loosened her hands from Oliver’s biceps and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her fingers sinking into his short hair and massaging his scalp. With a sigh, she kissed the top of his head.

For a long moment, neither of them said a word. They just caught their breaths while Oliver was listening to her heartbeat and Felicity stroked her hands through his hair. His softening length was still inside of her, his hands now stroking up and down her thighs.

Felicity shot a look at her watch and sighed. “Emily’s lunch break is almost over. We should head to the bathroom before she comes back and sees us like this.”

Oliver groaned, turning his head to rest his chin on the top of her chest and look at her. “We could also stay here and let her know that we are happily married and still have a fantastic sex life.”

“We could do that,” Felicity agreed with a slow nod of her head, “but then she will quit which means I will have to find a new assistant and, because you have been the one suggesting lying here which got us caught, I will be mad at you and refuse to have sex with you for at least a year.”

“You would never manage to withhold sex for an entire year,” Oliver replied. “You are going crazy after two weeks already, just like me.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows, looking at him challengingly. “Do you want to try? I can only remind you of that wonderful vibrator that-“

“And we are on the way to the bathroom already,” Oliver stated.

He pushed his arms under Felicity’s back and held her to him as he straightened up. Felicity tightened her legs around his hips a little more while he started walking. He could only take small steps given his pants were pooling around his knees, but he did it with the same grace each of his actions carried. When Oliver’s eyes met hers, he smiled and Felicity lowered her lips to his in response, kissing him gently.

“Oh, wait!” she hurried to say before he entered the bathroom, her lips pulling away from his. “My stockings and my shoes.”

Oliver pushed the door to the bathroom open and sat Felicity down on the counter. When he slipped out of her, they both groaned in unison. Felicity held onto the edge of the counter, slightly gasping for breath. Oliver pecked her lips shortly in response. He pulled his pants a little higher.

“I’ll get them.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied in a singsong while Oliver was leaving.

She grabbed one of the towels from the shelf next to her and wiped the remains of their sex from the insides of her thighs. Her folds were still sensitive and so were the insides of her thighs where Oliver had certainly left her with some beard burn. Unfortunately, she didn’t have the aloe vera crème here that would make the soreness of her skin a little more bearable. Thinking of his marks on her body, Felicity pulled down the neckline of her dress once more and looked at the red skin where Oliver had sucked to silence his moans. That was definitely going to grow into a wonderful hickey.

When Oliver came back into the bathroom, he put her shoes and stockings to the counter next to her. Felicity smiled in thanks and handed him a towel. Oliver wetted it and started cleaning himself up. Felicity watched him, leaning back against the cold mirror with a sigh.

“Did William tell you that he invited Audrey over for dinner next Wednesday?”

“No,” Oliver replied, perking up his eyebrows in surprise. “Is she coming to dinner here to us?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes. I have an appointment in San Francisco anyway and told them I’d pick them up. I think it’s getting more serious between them... like they might actually move into relationship territory.”

“Are you sure?” Oliver asked. “I mean… he’s only fifteen.”

Felicity chuckled. “He’s turning sixteen in two months. Besides, what did you do when you were fifteen?”

“I definitely didn’t invite girls over for dinner with my parents,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. He dropped the towel into the laundry bin and stepped in front of her, grabbing one of her stockings and gathering it up. “Do you think he is in love with her?”

Oliver held out the gathered-up stocking, so Felicity could slip her toes inside. He pulled the fabric up her leg then. His fingers stroked her skin through the thin material of the stocking.

“I think love is a big word for a teenager,” Felicity replied while Oliver was putting on her high heel. “I think he likes her and wants to make it right in some teenage-way. We have met her. Samantha has met her. Audrey’s parents have met him. Of course, officially it’s all still casual. The official version is that they are studying together for a school project. Since I am in San Francisco that day and Audrey’s grandma lives here and she wanted to visit her anyway, it was the easiest to combine these things.”

Oliver cocked his head. “Did you really have an appointment in San Francisco or did you make one?”

“Does it matter?” Felicity asked with a chuckle. “They needed a pretense and I was happy to help.”

Oliver nodded slowly, now continuing with the second stocking. “Do you know how far they have gone so far? I mean… is he… did they…”

Felicity chuckled at the way Oliver looked at her insecurely. “I think they had a few dates – pizza, videogames and movies – but that’s it. I mean they might have kissed or something, but not more. At least not that I know of. I am pretty sure they are not even calling it dates yet. He’s going to talk to you if he feels he needs to know anything.”

When Oliver had put on her second stocking and shoe, he tugged the hem of her dress down again. He put his hands to her hips and looked at her for a long moment. Felicity perked up her eyebrows, wordlessly asking what was going on. Oliver sighed and chuckled before he pecked his lips.

“You know me too well.”

“I know you just well enough,” Felicity replied and patted his chest. “So, what’s going on?”

Oliver sighed. “Are you sure William would really talk to me if he wants to know something? I know I am his dad and we have a great relationship, but we haven’t met each other for that long yet.”

Felicity cocked her head, casting him a sympathetic smile. “William loves you like a fifteen-year-old loves his dad. It doesn’t matter that you missed so much time. He knows he can talk to you if he wants to or needs to. That being said, there is a chance he just doesn’t want to. I guess talking about your first girlfriend to your dad might be a little strange after all. Besides, the internet probably tells you everything you need to know about sex.”

Oliver grinned and pulled Felicity closer to the edge of the counter. His arms wrapped around her waist loosely. He grinned amusedly.

“I might need a lot of comfort these next days.”

Felicity smiled, putting her arms around his shoulders. “Don’t worry, Hon. I am going to take good care of you.”

“Oh, I know you will.”

Oliver leaned forward and captured her lips in a gentle kiss. He tightened his arms around her and pulled her closer against him, making Felicity release a chuckle. She knew he could go again now and so could she, but they also knew they had other responsibilities. Besides, Emily could come back from her lunchbreak anytime and-

When the door opened, Felicity broke the kiss quickly. She looked at the door to find her assistant there with her hand slapped in front of her eyes.

“Oh my God!” Emily shouted out. “I am so sorry! I just wanted to wash my hands. I didn’t think you’d be here. I thought you were out for lunch too and not here and… whatever you are doing and-“

“Oh, don’t worry,” Felicity hurried to say, her cheeks red and hot from the blush that had spread on her face. “You really don’t have to be sorry. We shouldn’t even be in here anymore. Oliver was already about to go. This really doesn’t have to be embarrassing since we didn’t do anything in here. We didn’t have sex if you think that. I mean we did have sex, but not here. Earlier, in the office on my desk. Not that you would need to know any of that because we actually didn’t want you to catch us and, Oliver, please make me shut up.”

“I will just-“ Emily waved around with her hand to somewhere behind her. “And we will just act like this has never happened and… yeah… I’ll leave here.”

As the door shut behind her assistant, Felicity squeezed her eyes shut. How come she always managed to make things worse when she opened her mouth? This babbling was a curse. How was she supposed to look her assistant in the eyes again today, never mind the rest of the day?

“Do you want to take the rest of the day off?!” she called through the closed door.

“That would be great, yes!”

“Do whatever you want! I will pay for it!”

“See you tomorrow!”

“See you tomorrow!” Felicity answered. She hid her face in her hands with a long groan. “This is a nightmare.”

Oliver chuckled. “She took it kind of well.”

Felicity looked at Oliver angrily, boxing his shoulder. It only made him chuckle more which prompted Felicity to hit him once more. This time, Oliver caught her hand.

“This is all your fault,” Felicity complained.

“Hey, you were the one telling her what we did before.”

“You could have stopped me before I told her more than she needed to know, you know?” Felicity asked. “No sex for you for at least two weeks.”

Oliver released a mix of a grunt and a chuckle. “What? Why?”

“Because I am blaming you for this,” Felicity replied.

She pushed him away and got back to the floor. She smoothed her clothes under Oliver’s intent gaze.

“You are blaming me?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied shortly. “It would have been a year if she caught us in the act and would have quit. A day without her costs you two weeks.”

“It’s only half a day, so it should be one week.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “Fine, if you want to negotiate. One week.”

Oliver sighed. “One week is still too long.”

Chuckling, Felicity went to the door and turned around to him, watching his face that reminded of the one of a kicked puppy. Felicity leaned into the door.

“You should have thought about that before you haggled the price down to one week. Maybe I would have agreed, but the negotiations are finished. Sorry, Babe.”

Oliver groaned. “Oh, come on!”

Yet, Felicity only answered with a chuckle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teaser for the next chapter: The kids get nosy really nose when XXXXXXX invites XXXXX for dinner.  
> It’s an easy one after this chapter. ;)
> 
> The chapter is going to be short because the angst storyline that I am currently writing and not really happy yet will start after that. In case you missed it, these will be the chapter titles:
> 
> XXXXXX XXXX’S XXXXXX
> 
> FELICITY’S XXXXX
> 
> OLIVER’S XXXXXXX
> 
> THE TEAM’S XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
> 
> XXXXX’S XXXXXX
> 
> THE TEAM’S XXXXXXX
> 
> FELICITY’S XXXXXXXX
> 
> OLIVER’S XXXXXX


	257. Full house

Oliver quickly chopped the last champignons before he added them as well as the tomatoes and the bell pepper to the sauce. He mixed everything together and turned to the pan with stripes of chicken to turn them, whistling a melody that had been stuck in his head all day. The days that he had been surprised how much he loved cooking were long over. Last week, he and Raisa had even cooked together which had been a lot of fun.

He loved that Raisa was living with them now. Taking aside that there was no way he and Felicity would be able to keep managing their family without permanent help with Felicity still in charge of the company and Oliver running for mayor now, it was just great to have Raisa back in his life and to have her in his kids’ life. He couldn’t thank Felicity enough for bringing her in.

When Tommy entered the kitchen, Oliver turned his head over his shoulder. Tommy approached him slowly, dragging his feet as he went. He came to stop next to him, resting his head against his dad’s hip with a sigh and wrapped his arms around Oliver’s leg loosely. Oliver smiled sympathetically, stroking his fingers through his son’s hair.

“What’s wrong, Buddy?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Tommy replied.

Oliver put his hand to Tommy’s forehead, checking if he was running a fever. As much as he loved that Tommy was coming to him and snuggling up to his side, Oliver just knew that something wasn’t completely right for his little boy. The four-year-old was just more of a mama’s boy. He was usually turning to Felicity or any other female caregiver if possible. If he didn’t check where his mom was and came right to his dad instead, something wasn’t right.

“Are you sure?” Oliver asked when he figured his temperature wasn’t unusual and it had to be something else that was bothering him.

“Where’s mommy?”

“Upstairs, changing Millie’s diaper I think.”

“And Raisa?”

“Raisa took the night off to meet a friend,” Oliver replied and smiled. “You like Raisa, right?”

“We cook together sometimes,” Tommy explained.

“Do you want to cook with me?” Oliver suggested. When Tommy nodded, Oliver lifted his son onto the kitchen counter and handed him the wooden spoon. “You can stir the sauce, so I can take care of the chicken, okay?”

Tommy nodded and started stirring while Oliver was turning the chicken stripes once more. Oliver watched his son and smiled at the way he seemed to be all focused on his task now. It was probably the many of people here that were making him a little uncomfortable. It had meant to be only the family and Audrey, William’s friend or soon-to-be girlfriend if Felicity’s impression could be trusted. Lyla had called and asked them to take Sara and Connor for the day though since her sister had had a car crash, so she and John needed to go to the hospital. With seven other children, it might just be a little too much for Tommy.  

“Wow, if this doesn’t smell delicious,” Felicity said as she entered the kitchen, bobbing Millie up and down on her hip.

“And I am helping,” Tommy stated the obvious.

Felicity smiled. “Yes, you do. I am sure it’s only this delicious because you are helping.”

“Daddy, when is dinner ready?” Emmy asked, running into the kitchen.

“We are hungry,” Sara, who had followed her friend into the kitchen, added.

“Give it five more minutes,” Oliver replied. “You can already go and wash your hands.”

“Okay,” Emmy replied quickly.

“Mama,” Millie said to Felicity, rubbing her hands together.

“Do you want to wash your hands too?” Felicity asked, and Millie nodded in response. Kissing her cheek, Felicity set Millie down on the floor. “Go and ask Sara to help you.”

Immediately, Millie ran after her older sister and her friend, leaving Oliver, Felicity and Tommy alone in the kitchen. With a sigh, Felicity wrapped her arms around Oliver’s waist from behind and snuggled up to his back. Oliver smiled, stroking his hand over Felicity’s forearm.

“Can I do anything to help?” Felicity asked.

“You could set the table.“ When cries were coming from the living room where Emmy and Sara had probably left their youngest siblings alone in the playpen, he changed his answer. “Or you could get Addie and Connor here.”

“Alright,” Felicity replied, kissing his back through his shirt before she headed to the door.

“Do you need help or-“

“No, I will just roll the playpen over into the kitchen.”

“Smart idea.”

“I am said to be quite smart,” Felicity replied, winking at him.

Oliver chuckled. He loved having a full house. Surrounded by family and friends, it was always nice.

“Hey,” William said when he entered the kitchen a moment later. “Can we help with something?”

“You could set the table if you don’t mind,” Oliver suggested.

“Sure,” Audrey replied.

“No, not you. You are our guest,” Oliver told her with a smile. “Sit down. What can I offer you to drink?”

“A coke would be cool.”

“Sure,” Oliver replied.

“I’ll do that,” William said quickly.

Addie’s and Connor’s joint cries had just stopped, when Emmy and Sara came back into the kitchen, Millie walking between them. Oliver briefly noticed the conspiratorial glances the two girls shot each other, but was distracted when Millie came to him.

“Daddy,” she said and rubbed her hands together.

Oliver smiled and picked her up in his arms. “I know. You went and washed your hands. That’s good.”

“You are really pretty, Audrey,” Emmy said meanwhile and stroked her hand through a strand of Audrey’s hair. “I like your hair.”

“Thanks,” Audrey replied. “I like your shirt.”

“My mom bought it for me.” Emmy puckered her lips. “Do you have siblings?”

“No, but I always wanted a sister.”

“I wanted a sister too,” Sara replied, “but I got a brother. It’s okay too.”

“What are your hobbies?” Emmy asked.

“I like reading and watching TV. I am a movie junkie,” she explained.

“Do you watch Disney movies?” Sara asked.

“Sometimes, but not that often anymore. Sometimes, when I babysit, the girl and I are watching some movies.”

“Did you watch Frozen?” Emmy asked.

“Yes, I-“

“And Moana?” Sara added.

“That too though-“

“What about Cinderella?” Emmy asked again now.

“Girls,” William said warningly, shaking his head. “This is not an interrogation.”

“Okay, just one more question,” Emmy asked.

Audrey chuckled. “Okay, fine. What do you want to know?”

“Are you William’s girlfriend?” Emmy asked immediately.

“Uhm… I…”

Oliver had already turned around and was about to say something when Felicity came in, rolling the playpen with the two happy babies into the kitchen.

“Emmy, Sara, that’s enough,” she said firmly, her tone telling that she wouldn’t allow any more questions. “Audrey’s a guest here and a friend of William which is all you two have to know right now. Everything else is nothing for you to stick your nose into.”

“But, mommy, we-“

“Emmy,” Felicity said warningly, looking at her oldest daughter.

Emmy puckered her lips for a moment, probably about to say something more, but eventually she groaned and turned to Audrey. “Sorry, Audrey.”

“It’s alright,” William’s friend replied. She chuckled. “I always wanted to know what it was like to have a little sister and with William I can see it.”

“Well, I have three, so I guess I know everything about it.”

“Three and counting,” Emmy said, grinning happily.

Felicity chuckled, stroking her hand over Emmy’s hair. “We stopped counting, especially we were probably going to lose count with another kid.”

“But it has to be nice to have a big family,” Audrey said.

“It is,” Felicity told her, “but it’s also very exhausting.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” Audrey replied with a chuckle and looked at where Addie and Connor were pulling at the same toy in the playpen, squealing loudly at the same time.

“Dinner’s ready,” Oliver used the short pause in the conversation. He lifted Tommy from the counter. “Go and wash your hands, Buddy.”

While everyone sat down, William came over and took Millie from him to put her into her high chair. Felicity stepped next to Oliver only a moment later, filling the sauce into a bowl.

She looked over her shoulder shortly before she whispered, “I didn’t think it would all go this good. Eight kids in one room, three of them younger than two years and one of them an only-child who probably isn’t used to chaotic families like this one, and the house still isn’t on fire yet.”

“Well, if we proved something here,” Oliver whispered back, a wide grin spreading on his lips as he wiggled with his eyebrows, “it’s that we can still handle triplets.”

Felicity bumped her hip against his. “Certainly not.”

“Hey, it could be a nice challenge.”

Felicity leaned even closer to him, so it was really just him who could hear her when she whispered, “I think this would be too much of a challenge for Little Oliver, wouldn’t it be?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TIME FOR A STORY IS GOING ON A SHORT(!) BREAK
> 
> If you keep a look at the chapter guide or read the last few chapter notes, you know the angst/drama storyline is coming now. I have two of eight chapters finished and I am working on the third. I had some trouble at the start, but it's getting a little better now. 
> 
> Anyway, I always feel a little down when I am writing the angst storylines lately. Maybe I am too much connected to these characters by now, so I am not sure I will write all eight chapters one after the other. I might take a break to start my new multichapter to distract myself a little. Maybe, I will just pull through the angst, though. I haven't really decided yet.
> 
> To not make you wait too long between the chapters, I will only start posting the storyline once all chapters are written or I have at least started the last one. I think this might take a week or two, but then I will be back with a week of daily updates. ;)
> 
> Teaser for the next chapter: XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX Felicity, but she doesn’t XXXX XXXXXX.


	258. The Dragon Lady's return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, Guys!
> 
> The usual Tfas angst chapters are here. They are - with one minor exception - what you voted for. Everything you need to know about this new storyline [here](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/167418271790/upcoming-tfas-storyline).

When Felicity’s head dipped forward, slipping from her hand, she startled up from her microsleep. She had to blink several times until her view was no longer blurred. Felicity shot a short look at her watch and groaned when she realized it was only ten which meant there were still two hours to her video conference with Gotham City, Moscow and Tokio. She had no idea how she was supposed to hold on that much longer.

Usually, international video conferences that late didn’t bother her much. She was young enough and energized enough to get through those nights without much trouble. Besides, long nights at the Arrow Cave had been enough of a training for her. Since her kids had decided to infect each other with otitis media these past ten days, one sick kid taking over from the other, Felicity was just exhausted, though.

Tommy had started last week and infected Emmy. Just when Emmy had gotten better, Millie had showed the first symptoms. Only a few hours later, the same had started with Addie, who had struggled the most and basically cried nonstop without any pause. She hadn’t even rejected her milk which had made it even worse. It had been a nightmare of crying kids and sleepless nights for Oliver, Raisa and her. Three adults taking care of four sick kids had been just enough to make it work, but not enough to get through it without leaving them completely exhausted.

“Felicity?”

At the sound of her name, Felicity looked up. She was more than surprised to see Emily standing in the door and smiling at her.

“Shouldn’t you be long gone?” Felicity asked. “Your flight to Hawaii is early tomorrow morning, right?”

“At eight, yes,” Emily replied, nodding her head with a smile. “I was actually about to leave. I just wanted to tell you that you have a visitor.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “What? Who?”

“Ms. Williams from Channel 52. You know, she was the reporter who interviewed you and Oliver for that private look into your lives.”

“Yeah, I remember.” Felicity frowned. “What does she want?”

“She said she had some more questions that she’d like to ask you for her talk with Bob Simmons on Friday.”

“That guy that might enter the mayoral race too?”

Emily nodded. “Yes.”

Felicity released a sigh and pushed the calculations she had been checking away. Straightening up on her chair, Felicity put on a fake smile. “Then please ask her in.”

“Alright.” Emily smiled.

“Oh, Emily,” Felicity held her back when she was about to leave and waited until her assistant turned around to her. “Have fun on your vacation.”

Emily smiled. “I am sure I will.”

Soon after Emily had stepped out of her office, Felicity could hear her asking Ms. William’s in. Felicity had trouble to hold back a sigh at the sound of Ms. William’s high heels against the tiles of the floor. She had hoped that she wouldn’t have to see her ever again after those last questions in their interview when she had again and again tried to get any information about unfaithfulness in their marriage. She had even brought back up Oliver’s past with the Lance Sisters. It had been obvious she had been working for gossip media before. Bringing back personal missteps that were almost like a lifetime ago and forgiven and forgotten for all the people involved, was definitely not what Felicity would call professional journalism.

She regretted that they hadn’t asked Iris. Felicity had just forgotten that her friend would be the best choice for an interview like that. She knew Alex would have probably said she wasn’t the best choice anyway since she was their friend and, hence, the interview could be seen as too easy. Yet, she had rather accepted that than answering those stupid questions. It was too late now anyway as the interview had already been aired and, luckily, received positively for the most past. There were always some idiots who continued making up stories that weren’t true.

“Ms. Williams,” Felicity said, a reserved smile on her lips when the reporter stepped into her office. “You are working quite late.”

“I could say the same to you,” Ms. William’s replied.

There was something in her smile that made Felicity narrow her eyes slightly. Behind the triumphant expression that always made it seemed like she was a step ahead of her, there was something almost malicious. Felicity was sure whatever she was going to ask about was like an ace up her sleeve. Then again, she had almost thought the same thing back during the interview and all Ms. Williams had brought up had been old stories.

“I suggest we waste no time and get down to the basis immediately,” Felicity suggested, knowing it was best to take the offensive against her. “So, what questions can I answer for you?”

“I appreciate the skip of small talk,” Susan Williams noted briefly before she leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs. “I’d like to hear your statement on how your husband will be able to balance his nightly activity of taking the law into his own hands by chasing criminals as the Arrow with taking care of the city within the law by running for mayor.”

Felicity felt her heart skip a beat before it started racing in her chest. She got a grip on herself quickly though and hoped that the millisecond of shock hadn’t shown on her face. Even if it had, Felicity doubted that Susan William’s had any idea what microexpressions were.

“That is ridiculous,” Felicity replied with a bit of a chuckled, shaking her head. “Oliver was cleared of any suspicions raised against him  more than ten years ago if I remember correctly.”

“He was cleared of being the Hood ten years ago, not of being the Arrow,” Ms. Williams corrected, “by your mother’s boyfriend by the way.”

“Well, Starling might be a city, but in a lot of ways it feels more like a village.”

“Right. I mean Captain Lance was also the father of the sisters your husband slept with at the time the Gambit went down.”

Felicity sighed. “Really? That story is so stale at this point that I don’t get how anyone still even asks about it.”

“Well, I guess we get back to the question of what you think about your husband’s nightly activities then. There is no doubt that the Hood and the Arrow are the same person. There was just a little change in technics. Coincidentally, that change came when Oliver Queen came back to Starling City five months after his mother killed several hundreds of people in the Glades, also killing his best friend Tommy Merlyn.”

“Well, it would be an interesting story,” Felicity admitted, “but I fear the evidence is a little scant. I have been on a short vacation right before the Arrow came to town. You are not accusing me I guess?”

Ms. William’s lips widened to a smile that left no doubt she had another ace up her sleeve. Felicity forced herself not to slide back and forth on her chair uncomfortably. She stayed unmoving, waiting for the Dragon Lady, as Thea had called her, to speak.

“I am indeed not accusing you of being the Arrow,” Ms. Williams replied. “I am much more considering you some kind of accomplice. If we look at some of the Arrow’s crimes, it’s safe to say he needed someone with thorough tech knowledge. Apart from some hacks that he couldn’t have done, I also guess the special arrows might be an invention by you.”

“I appreciate that you think my husband and I would be that heroic that we’d dedicate our lives to save this city in every way possible, but I think you are overestimating us as well as our commitment to this city. We have kids. It would be crazy and completely unfair to them to do something like that.”

Felicity leaned back in her chair, trying to seem a lot more relaxed than she was. She knew that there was little to no chance that she could have any proof for her theory. It was just the fact that she came here to talk to her instead of talking directly to Oliver that unsettled Felicity a little. Wouldn’t it be much better for her to confront Oliver directly and catch it on camera?

“I am not sure if it’s heroic. I am actually sure the FBI would rather call it criminal. How high is the kill count?”

“The Arrow doesn’t kill,” Felicity replied.

“Except when it comes handy, right?” Ms. William asked, cocking her head. “Didn’t he kill Count Vertigo? Right here actually, right?”

For a split second, Felicity could feel her facial expression slip. She remembered quite vividly how Count Vertigo had kept her here, playing with her ponytail as he had breathed down her neck. She remembered asking Oliver not to kill him because she hadn’t wanted him to break his promise to Tommy for her. Yet, he had killed Count Vertigo and he had killed one of the criminals working with Michael Foster when he had come to attack her years later.

“I think if you don’t want to be sued for libel, you should leave now and not even think about publishing any of this nonsense,” Felicity stated with firm voice. “By the way, if you ever come near me or my family again, you won’t even have so much as a blog.”

“Is that a threat, Mrs. Queen?”

“More like a promise,” Felicity replied, leaning forward and propping her forearms on the desk, “but if you want to consider it something else, that is entirely up to you.”

“I think you mistake who has the upper hand here,” Ms. Williams replied. She opened her purse and pulled out some photos, dropping them on her desk. “I guess we should make that right.”

Felicity looked at Ms. Williams for a moment longer before she lowered her eyes to the photos. Her breath got caught for a moment when she saw the first photo. It showed the Arrow accompanied by Arsenal as he was getting out of the van in the small alleyway behind the club. Slowly, Felicity took a look on the other photos, watching the two men getting into the building. Photos of Oliver showed him leaving the club through the front entrance. The timestamp could prove that the actions could work together. There were more photos of the team in both, their civil clothes and their leather clothes. Some of the photos had been taken from a lower position, allowing glances under the hoods. Even with the bad light and the masks still on, it wasn’t too hard to recognize Oliver’s face. Of course it was easy to tell for Felicity since she knew Oliver so well, but she was sure the FBI’s facial recognition program wouldn’t have much trouble to prove that either.

Felicity cleared her throat, putting the photos back to the desk and pushing them towards Ms. Williams. “With all due respect to your lack of legal knowledge, I think even a little reporter like you should know that this is hardly enough to press charges.”

“It probably isn’t,” Ms. Williams replied, “but it will be enough to raise suspicions. The group of vigilantes getting into Verdant, the club owned by your husband and led by your sister-in-law’s husband, on a regular basis? If you ask me-“

“Well, I don’t,” Felicity interrupted her.

“Too bad. I am going to tell you anyway that it looks a lot like your husband is behind this,” Ms. Williams explained. “He disappears for five years and comes back all muscular like he has been trapped in a fitness studio. Shortly after his return, a vigilante with bow and arrow starts running around at night, killing criminals in a way to purge the city I guess. Then the Undertaking happens. Tommy Merlyn dies, and your husband disappears. Five months later, he comes back and the Arrow, with some suspicious parallels to the Hood, arises. He goes with a no-killing-vow it seems until Count Vertigo I guess, who coincidentally died in the company of your husband’s family. I am sure I could name another dozen parallels, but let’s skip a few years and go right to what happened when one of my colleagues might have raised a few questions about you and your family that revolved around faithfulness and true love. Do you also want to say it’s a coincidence that the Arrow attacked said journalist that night, just because he said a few mean things about you?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe he just wanted to stop the gossip and redirect the attention to real problems.”

“Possible,” Ms. Williams replied, “but we could leave this to the police to decide.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. Oliver had been arrested for being the hood few weeks after coming back from the island. It had been well planned back then, so he had been prepared for everything. It had basically been a setup to free him from any suspicions. Years ago, right before they had gotten together, and the League of Assassins had threatened them, Oliver had been close to facing charges once more. Ra’s al Ghul had threatened them with revealing his identity to Quentin. He had hated the Arrow for trying to fool him regarding Sara’s killer back then. Felicity was sure it wouldn’t have ended well if the League hadn’t backed off for reasons Felicity still wasn’t entirely sure of.

If Oliver faced charges now, it would be even worse. They wouldn’t only be unprepared like with Ra’s al Ghul’s threats. If the police saw these photos and really started investigating the case of the Arrow again, they would follow this lead and look into Oliver’s life. Then they’d start looking into the lives of the people close to him and Felicity was sure it wouldn’t take too long for them to realize who was behind the other masks and under the other hoods. This would threaten the happy lives of everyone on the team and, which was even worse, it would hurt the families they had all built by now. She and Oliver had kids. John had kids. Thea and Roy were about to become parents. Maybe they’d be able to spare the others, but certainly not Oliver.

Felicity took in a deep breath, calming her nerves. She made sure Susan Williams didn’t see that she had hit the bull’s eyes with basically everything she had said. Even with the evidence she had gathered, Felicity didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of letting her know that she was a little nervous about what she had discovered.

“Well, but if this isn’t enough for you, I have some even better shots,” Ms. Williams replied, pulling out some more photos and holding them out for Felicity.

Felicity took them, her heart sinking into her stomach as she saw them. Oliver was in his Arrow suit, the hood down and no mask on. Felicity didn’t even need to take a look at the other photos to know it had been taken the night Count Vertigo had held her captive here. Frowning, Felicity took a look over her shoulder, checking the wall for any cameras because they must have taken from there.

“Oh, don’t worry,” Ms. Williams replied. “I think Isabel Rochev took away the cameras once the company was hers.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. She knew Slade had installed cameras at the Queens’ mansion back then. They had used those cameras to fool him into believing Oliver was in love with her and attract his attention, so she had been able to inject him with the anti-serum later. Felicity had always thought having Isabel keeping an eye on what was happening in the company would be enough for Slade.

“These photos could be faked,” she said with a quiet clearing of her throat.

“They are not.”

Felicity released a dry chuckle. “You don’t really think I am trusting any of your words, right?”

“I will gladly send you a copy of the digital data and you can prove them yourself,” Ms. Williams replied. “For the time being, I have an offer for you.”

“An offer?” Felicity replied and crossed her arms in front of her chest. “I doubt that you could offer me anything that I want or need.”

“You will change your mind when you have figured out that these photos are unedited,” Ms. Williams replied, “because then you will see that there is no denying that I have you over a barrel. No Police Chief sleeping with his mother-in-law or ex-girlfriend working as an attorney will be able to help your husband from getting locked away for the rest of his life at least. Not even your tech skills will be enough since I have a lot of digital and analog copies of this proof against your husband in places nobody but me will ever know.”

Felicity had assumed so. It wouldn’t keep her from hacking the Dragon Lady’s computer and delete whatever material she’d find. She might even plant some other data onto her computer that might show that she had plagiarized some of her work before or faked proof for stories. It might not keep the story from being published, byte it would be able to raise doubts of its truthfulness. Besides, it would get that terrible woman away from any media because nobody would hire her ever again.

“Now would be the moment for you to ask what I have to offer,” Ms. Williams suggested. “Or maybe you should go on your knees and beg me not to publish it and tell me you’d do everything necessary if I just keep it to myself.”

“I think I need to pass on that one,” Felicity replied.

Susan Williams clenched her teeth. She obviously wasn’t happy that Felicity wasn’t playing by her rules. Felicity couldn’t help herself. For her, it was an unspoken rule never to make it too easy for the villains. The Dragon Lady might have her head over a barrel like she had said it, but Felicity wouldn’t play by her rules nonetheless.

“Well, I am going to tell you anyway.”

“Yeah, I thought so,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “Come on. Surprise me. What original offer do you have? A few millions for the photos? An exclusive interview with Oliver when he is voted mayor? I guess you couldn’t ask him about that yourself, right?”

“No, I came to you because my motives are quite different from that. I am actually putting your husband’s faith into your hands,” the Dragon Lady replied. “So, here’s my offer. In three days, I will interview Bob Simmons live on TV. It would be very easy for me to bring this up. Now, if you want to keep your husband from any investigations, all you have to do is leaving him. Just pack your things and go. Leave your kids or take them with you. I don’t care. All you have to do is leave him and not tell him why.”

Felicity frowned. “And what exactly do you have from that? A story about a married couple splitting up? Doesn’t sound that interesting to me.”

“You should leave journalism and my intentions up to me,” Ms. Williams replied.

Felicity looked at her for a long moment, scrutinizing her smug face. “I hope you know that my husband is not into women like you, you know, women who make it look like they are ruling the world, but who are actually just scared, little creatures. Besides, we have met twice now, and it basically looks like you only have one facial expression. It’s not really attracting, you know?”

“Like I said, you should leave my intentions up to me. They are none of your business,” Ms. Williams replied. She got up and smoothed her dress. “You have forty-eight hours to decide. If I haven’t heard from you then and don’t have proof that you left your husband, I will publish this story. Oh, same happens if for some reason anything happens to me by the way. I made sure of that.”

“Don’t forget your photos,” Felicity reminded the Dragon Lady when she turned around to leave.

“Don’t worry. I have enough copies,” Ms. Williams replied. She shot Felicity one last smug look before she went to the door where she turned back around to her once more. “You seem like a smart woman, so I am sure you will do what is right when it comes to the safety of your family. I am giving you three advices, though. I have so many copies in places that you simply can’t hack and will never be able to find, so don’t waste your times. Rearranging your secret hideout in Verdant’s basement is not going to get you anywhere either because the second photos are quite convincing and the suspicions that will be raised will be enough to investigate further than Verdant which brings me to my last part. You should think about your kids when you decide what to do. Seeing their daddy every other weekend if that is what you will decide for is better for them than visiting in prison once a month if there is even such a thing as letting children visit in a supermax. Well, through a glass probably. Besides, growing up as the children of a serial killer is certainly a lot for children to take, but that might just be me thinking that way.”

Ms. Williams shrugged her shoulders like she had just given Felicity advice what to wear without getting cold tomorrow. Pushing her hair back over her shoulder, she turned around and left. Felicity stayed where she was, unmoving and every cell of her body tense. Only when she heard the elevator doors closing, did she release a long breath and squeezed her eyes shut.

This couldn’t be true. How could she have photos from years ago? How could those photos not have come to the light sooner if they were real? Slade Wilson could have published them as a last gift to Oliver after he had locked him into the island prison. Even being there shouldn’t have stopped him.

Quickly, Felicity got up and pushed her chair to the wall. Climbing on top of it, she moved her hands over the wall panels, checking for anything suspicious. In case that camera was still there, and Susan Williams had access to the video it recorded, she didn’t want her to be able to gather anything more. Indeed, it seemed like the camera was gone, though.

“At least one thing she said that might be true,” Felicity whispered to herself.

Frowning, Felicity sat back behind her desk. None of this made much sense for her yet. Why would Susan Williams ask her to leave Oliver when clearly exposing him as the Green Arrow was the better story. Ever if she was into him and promised herself some reward when he was single, even she could not be that stupid to think Oliver would jump into bed with the first woman who threw herself at him once they were done. Why had she showed her the photos of Verdant before the ones in QC? Where had she even gotten those photos?

When a beeping from her computer revealed that she had gotten an email, she found it were the photos Susan Williams had promised to send her. Felicity wasn’t surprised that she wasn’t tired anymore. The Dragon Lady’s words that shaken off any tiredness she had felt before. Clearing her table from everything Felicity didn’t know, she started working algorithms on the computer. If there was a way to prove that these photos weren’t true or at least make it look like that, she’d find a way.

Felicity loved Oliver and she lived their family. She wouldn’t rest until she knew they were all safe again.

\----->

Almost five hours later Felicity was close to desperation. Her algorithm had only proved what the Dragon Lady had told her which was that the photos hadn’t been doctored. The facial recognition program of the FBI had had no trouble proving that Oliver was under the hood of the Arrow walking into Verdant either. Felicity didn’t know why she had even checked that since the photos of Oliver here in the former QC building during the night of Count Vertigo’s attack were convincing enough as they were.

Fact was that the last five hours of analyzing those photos in every way possible, all Felicity had achieved was convincing herself that she was up shit creek without a paddle. Actually, she was already about to drown probably. Susan William’s had gathered all the evidence that was needed to prove Oliver’s connection to the Arrow. If that came to the light, she’d have the police, the FBI and probably every other agency of the U.S. showing up at her doorstep, taking Oliver into custody and turning her entire life upside down. They’d turn the kids’ lives upside down and they’d also turn their friends’ life upside down. Even if there was no evidence who was behind the other identities, it didn’t take that much to figure out.

A few months ago, Felicity might have been a little bit more relaxed. According to Rogers, Starling’s last mayor, the Arrow and his team had been seen as the guardian angels of the city, people to rely on and heroes to look up to. Since he had stepped back from his office, things were different, though. The Arrow was seen much less positive than Rogers had let on. Even if the police wasn’t exactly in their necks yet – Quentin knew to prevent that – it wasn’t like they were as safe as they used to be. Hence, Felicity might have seen a little glimmer of hope that Oliver was spared a lifetime in death back then because of the change he had made and the man and hero he had grown into. It would have been a daring move given there was no doubt that the Arrow and the hood were the same person, but it would have been a silver lining. Now, that silver lining was gone and even if Oliver was voted mayor and stood up for the vigilantes, it wouldn’t be the same if it was ever exposed who was the Arrow. People wouldn’t consider his opinion as mayor valid if he was behind the mask.

Felicity got up from her chair and started walking up and down in her office hurriedly, trying to clear her head from the thousand thoughts that were running through her mind.

Susan William’s blackmail made no sense. She was using a really great story to force Felicity into leaving Oliver. For a reporter, that made no sense. Why would she exchange a story that would easily get her every job she wanted for a lame story of another somewhat famous couple breaking up?

It wasn’t the only thing that bothered her about the encounter with the Dragon Lady, though. She had told her to leave Oliver without telling him why – so far, so good. Yet, he hadn’t had any preference regarding the kids. If she had a real plan, shouldn’t she know what she wanted? If a possible romance with Oliver – not that Felicity thought he’d ever even touch her with a ten-foot pole – was the reason she was doing this, wouldn’t she have asked for Felicity to deny him seeing his kids? Susan Williams didn’t look like the kind of woman who wanted to take care of a child, never mind five stepchildren.

This all wasn’t... it didn’t fit together the way it should.

When Oliver had come back from the island, Quentin had investigated him for being the hood. The first suspicion had been thrown onto him because his welcome party had been close to the location where a business man had been attacked in his office. Of course, Quentin’s personal vendetta against Oliver had increased his interest in proving it was him.

Ra’s al Ghul had been driven by some legend which, admittedly, didn’t make much sense to Felicity, but not everyone could be as rational as she was. The Demon had planned on exposing Oliver to force him into joining the League. He had had a reason for his behavior that might not have been rational, but that had at least made sense in some way.

That was missing with Susan Williams.

Quickly, Felicity went back to her desk, sat down behind it and opened some new windows on her computer. Maybe it was time for a more thorough background check on the Dragon Lady. If she found out, who she was and what people she was connected to, maybe Felicity could bring some light into the darkness.

Her fingers were already dancing over the keyboard when her phone started ringing. Felicity lifted the receiver and just put it down again, not even looking up from the monitor as she did so. A split second later, she was typing again. Her eyes were barely fast enough to follow the commands as they appeared on the monitor. She trusted her fingers more than her eyes anyway, though. When her phone rang once more, Felicity just lifted and put down the receiver like before again, focused on her task and finding out what was behind the Dragon Lady’s blackmail. Her fingers got back into rhythm immediately.

It wasn’t until another ringing of her phone interrupted her workflow and she actually mistyped, Felicity groaned. Who the hell even called an office at three in the morning? It wasn’t like it was even remotely likely that they’d reach anyone. Besides, the people who worked this late – or was it this early? – usually did so because they didn’t want any calls or visitors to interrupt them.

“What?” she snapped at her phone, angry with whoever was calling her.

There was a short pause and Felicity was taking in a deep breath already, about to vent all her anger on whoever there was on the other side of the line. If this was a joke, it wasn’t a good one. Besides, it was really the wrong night for something like that. Her anger, frustration and worry were all mixed up to one messed up emotion inside of the pit of her stomach – rage.

“Everything alright?”

If it wasn’t for the sincerity of worry in the voice, Felicity might have not even realized who was talking there. The blood was rushing in her ears, making it hard to hear anything at all. Of course, she should have known who was calling this late at night.

“Oliver,” she whispered his name with a quiet sigh. Squeezing her eyes shut, she took in a deep breath and tried to calm herself down. “Why are you awake?”

“Well, it’s three in the morning and I roll over to pull my wife closer to me, so I can snuggle up to her back or maybe lie down on her chest and listen to the beat of her heart. Unfortunately, all I touched was the empty mattress,” he replied lengthily, and Felicity could almost hear the smile in his voice which calmed her down enough to quiet down the rushing of her ear. “Where are you? I thought you said that video call was going to take an hour at max?”

She wanted to avoid talking about that conference call that she had canceled last minute. She had just sent Bruce a message, telling him he had full reign. She trusted him enough to do that. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, her eyes wandering to the monitor where the unfinished command was waiting for her to correct the little mistype that had snuck in and finish it.

“Yeah, I am… I am doing some work,” Felicity replied.

 “At three in the morning?”

“I know it’s crazy.” Felicity released a chuckle that she wasn’t sure sounded convincing. “I am just in my workflow and I don’t want to stop yet.”

“I am going to repeat my question because I am not sure you heard it,” Oliver replied. “At three in the morning?”

Felicity bit down on her tongue even more firmly. She didn’t want to lie to Oliver. She didn’t want to tell him what had happened just yet either. She wanted to gather more information, so she had an overview on what to expect, could come up with a solution and present it to Oliver. Susan Williams had said she was putting Oliver’s fate and the fate of their family into her hands. Maybe that was a key to how to get out of this situation without ripping her family apart in any way.

“Yeah, something important came in and…”

“What’s so important that you have to work on it – and I am just going to repeat it once more – at three in the morning?” Oliver asked her. When Felicity didn’t answer immediately, he chuckled. “Forget it, I wouldn’t understand it anyway.”

Felicity didn’t get herself to chuckle. She just smiled sadly, looking at the monitor. At least that spared her the lie of what she was working on. She couldn’t tell him what was going on over the phone.

“I should probably come home, right?” she asked eventually, dreading the thought of leaving her work here now, but knowing she owed Oliver the truth even if she felt like she shouldn’t interrupt her research and could still tell Oliver later. Once she had a solution and knew more, it would just be easier. “You’re right. It’s already late.”

“Well, that’s what you should do if you choose door one,” Oliver replied. “Then there’s door two which means I will come and get you because I don’t like if you drive when you are tired. Then there’s also a door three. You stay where you are and, exceptionally, continue working on whatever it is since it seems to be important to you and, like you said, you are in your flow.”

Felicity hesitated since she hadn’t missed the quiet sigh that had gone with the third option. “How mad are you when I take that third door?”

Oliver chuckled. “Not mad at all.”

“Really?” Felicity asked. “Because I’d really like to keep working on this.”

“If it’s so important to you, do it,” Oliver replied. “Just promise me you won’t work all night and then all day tomorrow without a pause. These next days without Emily will be hard as it is. Don’t make it any harder by using all your energy tonight already. Go to that little penthouse that was built on the top floor and allow yourself a few hours of sleep and a healthy breakfast tomorrow morning.”

“You didn’t forget,” Felicity whispered more to herself than to Oliver.

“What? That Emily is on vacation?” Oliver asked with a chuckle. “How could I? I always remember those dates because I know I have to keep an extra eye on you, so you don’t exhaust yourself too much. Emily usually is my little spy to call me if she thinks you are exhausting yourself, so I can pull you back. When Emily isn’t there, I just know I have to watch how you are even more closely, especially now that I am a little distracted with the campaign and everything.”

“That, indeed, sounds a lot like you,” Felicity said with a low sigh. Her eyes wandered back to the monitor shortly. “You don’t seem to be distracted at all, though. You are taking care of me as thoroughly as you always do. So, what have you planned for tomorrow?”

“Alex wants me to meet some people, so I will be out and about most of the day. I should be back home by six for dinner, though.”

“Okay, then enjoy your sleep and good luck for tomorrow, not that you need it. I know from personal experience that you are great at charming people.”

“Thanks,” Oliver replied. “Will I see you for dinner tomorrow?”

“Sure.”

“Okay, then I am not bothering you any longer. Goodnight.”

“Night, hon,” Felicity replied and quickly put down the receiver again.

Instead of turning around to her keyboard and her monitor again, she stared at the receiver of the phone for a moment longer. She hated not being open with Oliver. She wanted to tell him the truth of what had happened, but right now there wasn’t anything he could do. Threatening the Dragon Lady would not do them any good with the way things were right now. She’d only publish the photos sooner and rob them of any chance to find out how to prevent this from happening. Besides, that really wasn’t something to talk about over the phone.

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, taking in a deep breath. This was her family that was under attack, and she’d do whatever she had to do to protect it. She wouldn’t allow anything to rip them apart – no blackmail, no criminal investigations and no breakup. If that meant she had to keep a secret from her husband for a few hours, even if it was the last thing she wanted to do, then she’d do it. Oliver would understand. He’d do the same thing if it was the other way around.

Felicity released the breath she hadn’t known she had been holding. She turned around to her computer and shook her fingers to try stopping them from shaking as wildly as they had before. The trembling was still there, but it wasn’t as bad as it had been. Felicity nodded to herself, assuring herself that she was ready, before she let her fingers dance over the keyboard again, correcting and continuing the commands she had been interrupted with before.

“You might think you are smart,” Felicity whispered to herself even though she imagined the Dragon Lady to be anywhere close, so she could hear her, “but I can guarantee you that I am at least a thousand times smarter than you.”


	259. Felicity's truth

The Dragon Lady’s return had managed to do what no day alone with five kids had ever accomplished – it had brought her to the verge of her physical and emotional endurance. Never in her life had Felicity felt this exhausted and defeated and it wasn’t because of the lack of sleep but because of whole mess of a situation they were in.

Eighteen hours of the Drag Lady’s ultimatum had already passed, and Felicity was no closer to finding out why she was doing this or who she might be working with or how to stop her. Eighteen hours of working nonstop on finding out anything only made it seem like there was nothing to be found.

Susan Williams had been born by a teacher and his wife, a three years younger cook. The two of them were still married and lived in Gotham City where the Susan Williams had grown up and attended school. After graduating from high school, she had gone to a local college and majored in journalism. During her time there, she had already gathered experience by working for the college’s newspaper. None of her articles had seemed spectacular and she had left with rather average grades. After two years of working for a gossip magazine in Gotham, she had switched to a TV gossip magazine of a channel in Central City. When the moderator had left for personal reasons, she had been able to take over the show. The show was dropped last year. Susan Williams attended a retraining and advanced education for political journalism then and was hired by Channel 52 not much later. Her mails and phone calls were only work-related or with her parents. Nothing about her gave away why she was blackmailing Felicity.

Felicity unlocked the front door and dropped her purse and keys to the floor carelessly for the first time since Raisa had moved in with them. She slipped out of her shoes, leaving them where they were instead of kicking them closer to the wall, so they weren’t in the way. She was too exhausted for trying to be neat.

She strolled into the kitchen, relieved it was just Raisa there. She had assumed that Oliver wasn’t home yet since he had told her he would only be home for dinner when they had talked last night and repeated the same thing in a text message. Aside from Oliver, Felicity also didn’t want to run into the kids. She was sure she looked like crap with dark shadows under her eyes and pale face. If she even looked half as terrible as she felt, she knew she had to look like a ghost or a zombie or some weird mixture of those creatures that she wasn’t sure existed. She should ask Cisco about that.

“Hey,” Felicity said quietly, calling Raisa’s attention onto herself.

Raisa turned around, a smile on her lips that fell away as soon as she saw her face. “Felicity, is everything alright?”

“Just a headache,” Felicity replied, pulling her hair tie from her hair to loosen it out of her high ponytail. She massaged her scalp, but it didn’t help with her headache at all. “I should have listened to Oliver when he told me that I shouldn’t work all night.”

“Are you sure that is all?” Raisa asked.

Something about the way Raisa looked at her, almost like she had a suspicion and wasn’t just worried, made Felicity frown. “What do you mean.”

“I don’t want to go beyond what is decent given that I am working for you and I am not really family-“

“You are family,” Felicity replied firmly. “And you can always say whatever you think.”

Raisa smiled at her gratefully before she took a step closer and explained, “Oliver mentioned that something might be wrong.”

“He did?” Felicity asked though she wasn’t surprised at all. Oliver knew her too well to not feel when something was going on with her. “Did he say something in specific?”

“Just that he thinks something is going on and you might need some time to open up. He was worried when he left, though.”

Felicity nodded slowly, lowering her eyes. She had just hoped that Oliver believed her when she said that she was too busy with her work. He knew how excited she was about her work, so she had hoped he’d just understand and assume it was the truth she told him. She should have probably known better.

“Where are the kids?” asked after a moment.

“Emmeline and Thomas are in the garden to play. Camille and Adelaide are in their playpen in the living room. I was just about to Camille some warm fruit tea.”

“Thank you so much for holding the fort,” Felicity said with a tired smile and leaned into the doorframe. “Oliver and I really didn’t know what we’d do without you.”

“I love your family. It’s a pleasure for me to watch your kids.”

“I am really glad to hear that,” Felicity replied.

Raisa was silent for a moment, just looking Felicity up and down, before she asked, “Can I get you anything? A tea maybe? Or should I cook my super special chicken soup? The kids all recovered from their sicknesses soon because of it. And if there is something else bothering you, a hot chocolate with whipping cream and an open ear that I certainly have you might work some magic.”

Felicity smiled. “The chicken soup really got us through the last week when the kids were safe and I appreciate the offer to talk. I think I will just lie down a little, though.”

“Should I wake you for dinner?” Raisa asked.

“Yeah, sure,” Felicity replied with a tired smile. “Thanks.”

She turned around and headed upstairs. Once she had closed the door behind her, she dropped the hair tie she had still been holding to the floor and took off her dress. She grabbed one of Oliver’s used shirts from the laundry bin and put it on since it was by far her favorite piece of clothing. On her way to the bed, she lifted the neckline of the shirt to her nose and breathed in the scent of his skin that was stuck to the fabric.

As soon as she was lying in bed, covered with her blanket, Felicity closed her eyes, about to release a long sigh. At the same time, she felt a sob burning in her throat, causing an indescribable sound to fall from her lips. Tears welled in her eyes before they fell and rolled down her cheeks. Quickly, Felicity turned her head into the pillow, keeping the loud sobs that were falling from her lips now down. Her body was shaking, overtaken by the heavy of her feelings.

If she was going to give into the Dragon Lady’s blackmail and left Oliver, she’d rip her family apart. If she didn’t let herself be blackmailed and the Dragon Lady published her photos, she’d rip her family apart. If she told Oliver, he’d lost his temper at the threat against his family and attacked the Dragon Lady, she’d publish the photos anyway and, again, Oliver would only end up in prison for the rest of his life. Hence, she would have ripped her family apart by telling him. As long as she didn’t have a solution, everything she’d do could possible rip her family apart.

With that thought in mind, Felicity cried herself to sleep.

 

 

Felicity was still in the process of waking up when she realized she was no longer alone in bed. Oliver’s chest was pressed against her back, his strong arms wrapped around her so tightly that she couldn’t feel more protected. His left arm was pushed under her head and caged her upper body between it and his chest. The fingers of his right hand ran up and down the outside of her thigh slowly, telling her he was awake.

“Are you feeling any better?” Oliver whispered suddenly and leaned his head down to kiss the soft skin under her ear, his stubble gentle scratching her. “Raisa said you had a headache.”

“Yeah, my head still feel like it’s going to explode,” Felicity replied truthfully. “I don’t remember when was the last time I had a headache like this.”

“Do you want to take something?” Oliver asked, putting his hand flat against her thigh. “You are stopping to express milk now anyway, so it wouldn’t be much of a deal. We still have some bottles in the freezer too, so-“

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “No, I don’t want to take anything. It’s my own fault I have this headache because I worked too much. Now I gotta live with the consequences. Maybe that will teach me a lesson.”

Oliver rested his head in the crook between her neck and shoulder as he tightened his arms around her. Felicity sighed and moved as close to him as possible. She turned her head to kiss his bicep briefly before she rested her cheek back there and closed her eyes with a sigh. They lay like that in comfortable quiet for some time. Felicity stroked her fingers up and down his forearm absentmindedly.

“How late is it?” she asked after a moment.

“Almost midnight,” Oliver replied. “Raisa wanted to wake you for dinner, but you were so fast asleep and looked so exhausted, I figured it was better to let you sleep. Dinner’s in the fridge if you want something.”

“Not hungry,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver released a long breath that ghosted over the front of her chest and elicited goosebumps all over her skin. He kissed the juncture of her shoulder and neck shortly before he snuggled his stubbled cheek against the side of her neck again. Felicity lifted a hand and stroked her fingers through his short stubble. Oliver stopped stroking her thigh and kissed the palm of her hand before he went back to moving his fingers over the outside of her thigh gently again.

“Are you alright?” Oliver asked after a moment.

“Not really,” Felicity replied, her voice so low it was barely audible in the dark room.

“Did someone hurt you?” Oliver asked immediately.

There was another moment of quiet as Felicity was thinking about an answer. Her hesitation seemed to be all the answer Oliver needed, though. His entire body tensed at her alleged confession. Felicity squeezed his forearm, trying to calm him down.

“Not like that that,” she whispered.

“Then how?” Oliver asked. “Please tell me.”

Felicity opened her mouth, unsure what to say. It didn’t matter though. Before she could have decided, a heart-wrenching sob fell from her lips. A moment later, tears were already streaming down her face. Her body was shaking from the heavy sobs that fell from her lips.

“Come here, honey,” he whispered and turned Felicity around, so they were lying chest to chest, her face hidden against the side of his neck. “It’s okay. You’re safe with me.”

Felicity wished she could believe him, but she was unable to. The overwhelming fear of seeing her family fall apart right in front of her made it hard to believe anything. Oliver seemed to realize that his words didn’t help. He didn’t say anything more and just held her, rubbing one hand over her back and stroking the other over her hair.

After the long time of crying before, she had thought there would be no more tears left to cry. She should be dried out and maybe have her emotions under control better than before by now. Obviously, neither of this was the case.

Felicity didn’t know how long it took. Eventually, her breathing evened out, though. Her body relaxed a little. Her hands stayed clawed in his shirt like she could keep him close if she just held on tightly enough though. Felicity closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, breathing in the scent of Oliver’s skin that made a wave of comfort rush through her. For a long time, they just lay in the quiet like that, neither of them saying a word. Though, Felicity had stopped crying, her body trembling no longer, Oliver continued stroking his hand over her hair and back comfortingly.

Some more time passed before Oliver asked, “Did I do something wrong?”

“God, no,” Felicity hurried to say. She angled her head back to look at Oliver for the first time this night. “You didn’t do anything. You-“

“I didn’t have much time for you lately,” Oliver interrupted her. “I used to have a lot more time for you before I entered the mayoral race and-“

“Oliver, you still remember when my assistant is on vacation. When you go easy as a husband, you are still a better husband than average. Following your own dreams does not make you a worse husband and I would never see it as something negative or blame you for that because I know that, when I need you or our kids need you, you’d be here and we’d have your full attention a second,” she told him. “So, really don’t even think about any of this being your fault.”

Felicity kissed the underside of his jaw before she rested her head back on Oliver’s bicep. She kept her eyes lowered, watching the even rising and falling of his chest. She felt nauseated and still as exhausted as she had been when she had just come home.

“You don’t have to tell me now,” Oliver whispered. “I know you will tell me when you feel ready, right?”

Felicity nodded, feeling her throat burn once more. When she squeezed her eyes shut, taking in a deep breath, a single tear escaped the corner or her eye and rolled down her cheek. She took in a sniffling breath that she hoped was quiet enough for Oliver not to hear. If the kiss he pressed to her forehead was any indication, it hadn’t gone by unnoticed, though.

Oliver sighed. “Do you want me to leave you alone?”

“No,” Felicity replied without hesitation, moving even closer to him. “Just hold me please.”

“Everything you want,” Oliver promised, his arms tightening around her, “so if there is anything else you want or need-“

“No,” Felicity replied once more, shaking her head against his chest. “Just hold me.”

It was nice like this. Just being close to Oliver without saying a word or doing anything was nice. It was also dishonest, though. In this moment, it was dishonest. She still hadn’t told Oliver about Susan Williams’ ultimatum though she knew she had to.

Rationally, the decision was easy. She was being blackmailed. She worked in a team of heroes that took down criminals every night. They could help her with this. The problem was that Susan William’s wasn’t one of their usual criminals. She was aiming right at their hearts and it seemed like it didn’t even make any sense. Felicity doubted anyone could help take her down without that Dragon Lady taking down everyone else with her. If nobody on the team could help her, was it worth telling them and risking that the news about Oliver being the Arrow dropped?

That brought her to the emotional side of this. What Felicity wanted and needed was her family to be safe and sound. She didn’t want to rip their father away from her children. She knew that neither of the options the Dragon Lady had given her actually allowed Oliver to be in his kids’ life the way he was before. If he was in prison that was a completely different thing than if they were just living apart, though. The kids would still be able to see their dad whenever they wanted to, and Oliver would be able to see them whenever he wanted to. They would still be a part of each other’s life if he she did what Susan Williams had demanded from her. Oliver just wasn’t going to be a part of her life any longer which would hurt her more than she could probably imagine. If she had to decide between giving up on Oliver and having her kids lose a lot of time with their dad, she’d rather have Oliver in her kids’ lives. She was an adult and she would have to handle the consequences of this, but she didn’t want her children to suffer like she had suffered. Children lived through their parents’ divorces all the time, so it wouldn’t be too much for them, right? She and Oliver would just have to make sure that their children weren’t torn apart between them, but she was sure that wouldn’t be a problem. Whenever they had fought or had trouble in their marriage, they had made sure the kids weren’t affected by it.

In so many ways, leaving Oliver was the better perspective of the options she was given. Oliver would go crazy if he was in prison. Her kids would grow up as the children of a known serial killer and, with the famousness of their family, there was nowhere they could run from that. Besides, if they ran, her kids wouldn’t even be able to visit her father anymore at all. On top of that, she’d have to leave William, who would just then find out his dad was Starling City’s top vigilante, behind. There was no way Samantha would let her take him with her.

But how would she be able to leave Oliver? He wouldn’t just let her go, not as long as she couldn’t make him believe that she really didn’t want him anymore. Felicity doubted that she was a good enough liar for that. Oliver would be able to see right through her. She’d have to enforce it if she wanted to leave him. Maybe she’d tell Bruce to come over to Starling and they’d pose for some intimate photos that absolutely intentionally would leak to the press and be published. It would break Oliver’s heart, but it would hit a nerve, so maybe he’d believe her then and let go. He could start a new life then, maybe fall in love with someone else eventually and be happy despite what she had done to him.

Felicity felt a shiver running through her body at the thought. Oliver seemed to have noticed because he pulled the blanket higher and tightened his arms around her.

“Are you cold?” he asked. “Do you want a tea?”

“I’m fine,” Felicity answered.

“We both know that is not true.”

“I just meant that I don’t need anything. Thanks.”

“Just say it if you change your mind.”

Even here and now, she already knew that if he ever believed her, it would break her heart just as much as it would break his. As frightened as it could be when you knew there was a person who could read through each one of her actions and facial expressions, it also made life so much easier sometimes. With this, it would make it incredible hard.

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut. So many people could get hurt by this. Life as Felicity and the people close to her knew it was over. She knew that she’d get hurt either way and the same applied to Oliver. They’d get hurt and would suffer, no matter what Felicity chose to do, so Felicity had to do what was best for her children and everyone else involved. Hence, the answer was apparently.

“Susan Williams is blackmailing me.”

Felicity released a breath she hadn’t known she had been holding. All day she had gone back and forth between telling Oliver the truth or following Susan Williams’ demands and leaving him. Almost everything inside of her had told her that the better solution was to leave him. It was healthier for him and for the kids and safer for everyone on the team and their families. At the same time, she hadn’t really believed that she’d be able to do it or that she even would do it. She had hoped that she wouldn’t do it because there had been this little voice in the back of her head. It had kept reminding her of all the times she and Oliver and promised each other to trust each other. _I vow that if we have to face adversity – and we both know we will with the life we lead – we will never have to face them alone because I vow to lean on you whenever I need it and let you lean on me why you need it_ he had promised her during their last wedding. She wouldn’t have been able to look at herself in the mirror anymore if she had broken that promise. No matter what they faced, she and Oliver were best when they worked together.

She had whispered the words, mumbling them against his chest. If it was anyone else, she was sure they wouldn’t have heard it. Really, it could have been taken as a grunt or a yawn or even some soft snoring. Oliver wasn’t anyone else, though.

“What?” he asked with a dark growl.

Felicity kept her eyes straight at Oliver’s shirt. “She came to me last night. She showed me photos of the Arrow entering Verdant and you leaving some time later. The photos proved that whenever the Arrow as out that night, you were at Verdant from where the Arrow was leaving too. She told me that I should leave you and not tell you why. Otherwise the photos would be published in the interview she does with Bob Simmons. I got nervous, but I tried to hide it. I told her that her demands were ridiculous because the photos didn’t prove anything. She showed me more photos then. They have been taken from a hidden camera in QC the night you took down Count Vertigo. You didn’t wear a mask. Your hood was down. If you had posed, the photos couldn’t have been better. She said I have eighty-four hours and left. I spent all night and day trying to figure out a way to get us out of this mess. I tried to find out who she is working with and why she would do this. I have no idea what’s behind this and I have no idea what we should do now.”

Once more, Felicity felt tears welling in her eyes and her throat burning. She squeezed her eyes shut and released a long breath. When Oliver didn’t say anything, she leaned her head back to look at him. Her eyes met his immediately. She saw the slightest of disappointment under the confusion in his eyes, but she chose to swallow down the bitter taste that left in her mouth. Those feelings would have to wait.

“Oliver, what are we going to do?”

Apparently, Oliver wasn’t able to push away his emotions the way the situation might demand. Felicity couldn’t blame him. She had had more than twenty-four hours to process this and she had let her emotions take over too. He had the same right.

“She wanted you to leave me?” he asked, his voice threateningly quiet.

“She said she didn’t care what I’d do with the children. I could leave them with you or take them with me,” Felicity replied honestly and shrugged her shoulders. “She just wanted me to leave you without telling you the real reason.”

Oliver’s face stayed unmoving as he continued looking at her for some longer. “Is the reason you didn’t tell me about this until now that you actually considered it?”

Felicity hesitated. She had thought about that option a lot, but a part of her had always hoped that she’d tell him at the end, not matter what. She had hoped, but she hadn’t been completely sure. She had seen firsthand what happened when you tried to protect the people closest to you. Sometimes you pushed them away because you felt it was the better option.

“I don’t know,” she replied honestly.

Oliver didn’t bat an eye. If Felicity didn’t know him as well as she did, she might think that he hadn’t heard her. His silence could also be mistaken as some calm before the storm. It wasn’t, though. Felicity didn’t doubt that there was a storm raging inside of him already. He just didn’t let it show on the outside yet.

That changed abruptly when Oliver pushed the blanket away and got out of bed. Quickly, Felicity sat up in bed.

“Okay, I know you’re angry,” Felicity hurried to say. “You have every right to be angry, but can we please postpone that until we have a solution for this situation and-“

“Don’t worry about it. I am going to handle this,” Oliver replied darkly.

“How?” Felicity asked. “I tried to find a solution, but there is none. I mean what do you want to do that isn’t going to end up making things even worse? Maybe we should use the hours we have left until the time is up to figure out a plan and… I don’t know.”

Once Oliver was fully dressed, he turned around to her. His thumb was rubbing against the other fingertips nervously before it grazed the wedding band and swirled it around his finger for a moment. His eyes stayed fully focused on hers.

“I am going to turn myself in.”

“What?”

Oliver pressed his lips together for a moment, his face still darkened. When Felicity bit down on her bottom lip nervously, his eyes flickered down to her lips. It took another moment before he released a sigh. His facial expression softened, his shoulders losing a bit of tension. He walked around the bed and sat down at the edge of the mattress. Immediately, his fingers found hers. She held onto his hands tightly like she could just keep him from following his plans if she kept him from leaving.

“Let’s just, like you said it, postpone talking about the fact that you didn’t come to me immediately and actually took time to maybe keep your options open,” Oliver said, squeezing her fingers. “I won’t let anyone blackmail you or anyone else in our family, especially not with something that I have done. If you say you didn’t find any other way, then maybe this is it.”

He leaned forward and kissed her lips before he got up. When he let go of her fingers, Felicity got up quickly and hurried to the door. She reached it before Oliver and blocked his way, her heart beating up into her throat. Oliver pressed his lips together once more, just looking at her.

“Oliver, this is crazy,” Felicity whispered loudly. “They are going to lock you away for the rest of your life.”

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest. “What other options do we have? Giving in and breaking up with each other?”

“Well, we could do it just for pretense, so we find out what she’s really planning,” Felicity suggested. “I know it would suck, but at least that way we have a chance to make a plan.”

“Yeah, if Susan Williams is playing fair,” Oliver replied, “but most people don’t play fair when they don’t even shy away from blackmail. We could break up for pretense but there is no guarantee that she is keeping her part of the deal. The photos could end up being published nonetheless. So, what would we do then? Never mind, that it’s only going to be more confusing for the kids. I don’t even want to picture what happens when the police comes barging in here and arrests me in front of their eyes. Do you have any idea how traumatizing that would be?”

“Of course, but-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her. “This is the best we can do now. The kids will be safe with Raisa and you. The police will be busy with me. That gives you and the team time to figure out what to do.”

“Yeah, but it’s a little unfortunate if you already committed that you’re him,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. She took a step forward and put her hands to Oliver’s chest. His hands came to rest on her hips. “Oliver, please let us call the team and think about something together. I doubt that John showing up as the Arrow is going to be enough this time around. We need a really good plan if we want to do this. Committing the crime and yet proving your innocence after is basically impossible.”

“Then you guys will find a solution, but I am not going to sit here and wait for the police to make the first move. We can’t risk that they find out about the others on the team. If I turn myself in, we have the upper hand and the possibility to direct the course of the investigations a little. At least that way, maybe I can keep the kids from this,” Oliver told her. “They are asleep now. It’s better for them not to find out by the police coming barging in here. This way, you can tell them and make them understand why I had to do this.”

“I am not sure it’s better,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “My dad left in the dark of the night too. It didn’t make anything better.”

Oliver cocked his head and wiped a tear that was rolling down her cheek away gently. “Yeah, but your dad left because he wanted to go. I am leaving because I am protecting my family. That’s different.”

“What about William?” Felicity asked. “He doesn’t even know that you are the Arrow. Don’t you want to wait until you had the chance to talk to him at least?”

Oliver hesitated for a moment which gave Felicity the first glimmer of hope. Maybe she had finally hit a nerve that would make Oliver reconsider his decision. Oliver seemed so terribly determined on his decision. Felicity might not know what to do, but she felt like this were quite drastic measures. Yes, their situation was desperate, but this didn’t seem like a solution, at least not in the long run.

Oliver sighed. “I don’t like to say it, but you will have to handle that. It’s not fair, but it’s all we can do.”

“Oliver-“

“I am not letting our family being blackmailed,” Oliver interrupted her firmly. “If you have any other idea how to handle this, tell me.”

Felicity swallowed, tears welling in her eyes. She didn’t know what she had thought would happen if she told Oliver, but she definitely hadn’t thought it was going to be this. This was everything she had feared would happen if Susan Williams published the photos. That Oliver was doing it now, didn’t seem to make it any better.

“Then it’s decided,” Oliver replied to her quiet. He captured her lips in a gentle kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Felicity responded, her fingers clawing into his shirt, “and that is why I can’t let you go.”

Oliver stroked his hand over her hair. “I know, but this is our only possibility to keep the upper hand over this situation. We will find a way to solve this, but, if we don’t, I’d rather have it be something real that is hurting our family than a lie. I started this whole vigilantism thing. Now, I will pay the price for it.”

He kissed her lips once more before he gently pushed her away from the door, shot her one last look and left. Felicity felt her heart aching in her chest, her stomach cramping. This was a nightmare, one that seemed to get worse with each day.

She had hoped telling Oliver would make it easier and for like two seconds she had felt the relief of not having to lie any longer. She hated keeping secrets from Oliver, so it had felt good to tell him. Now, she almost regretted it a little. Oliver wanted to protect their family the way she had wanted to protect their family. Like so often, they seemed to go about it in completely different ways.

When Felicity felt the paralysis that had taken hold of her decreasing, she quickly left the bedroom, intending to run downstairs and keep Oliver from leaving once more. She had just reached the top of the stairs when she heard the front door falling shut. Felicity launched into running downstairs, but the low cries coming from Addie’s room kept her back. She looked back and forth for a moment, torn between needing to keep Oliver from leaving and needing to check on Addie.

“Damn it!” she mumbled to herself.

She turned back to the hallways and hurried to Addie’s room. Her baby girl was lying in her crib and kicking her feet with discontent.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” she asked Addie, her voice not sounding as soft as she had hoped it would given the situation with Oliver. “Come here, Sweetie.”

Felicity lifted the crying baby into her arms, rubbing her hand up and down her daughter’s back. When she heard the engine of a car, she hurried to the window to see Oliver directing their car out of their garage. She felt her heart sinking. She knew her husband too well to think that he’d reconsider his decision. He’d really turn himself in.

Pulling Addie, who was still crying, closer to her chest to comfort the baby as well as herself, Felicity quickly went downstairs. She bobbed Addie up and down on her hip while she was pulling her purse from the coatrack downstairs and searched for her phone. As soon as she had found it, she hurried to the living room, already dialing John’s number.

While she was praying for John to pick up, she walked up and down the room, hoping for Addie to stop crying. The baby seemed to see no reason to calm down though.

“Yeah?”

“I am sorry for waking you up,” Felicity hurried to say, “but this is an emergency. You need to try to get to the police before Oliver does.”

“What? Why? What happened?” John asked, all tiredness suddenly gone from his voice.

“I can’t tell you the entire story now, but Oliver wants to turn himself in.”

“I am already on my way.”


	260. Oliver's actions

_…still in shock after the breaking news. Oliver Queen turned himself in to SCPD during the night and committed to be the Arrow. Over the last ten years, the green-leathered vigilante got onto the police’s radar repeatedly for taking justice into his own hands and chasing criminals, his weapon of choice a bow and arrows. The responses to the Arrow’s approaches of committing himself to fighting crimes in the city changed a lot over the years. At times, the Arrow was seen as a practical tool for the police to help with the increasing crime, especially when he built his own team with the vigilantes known as Spartan, Speedy, Arsenal and Black Canary. Still, the complains from several sides such as politics and citizens as well as inside the police that the vigilantes were operating on a basis of self-justice never truly died. This is even more so as the Arrow’s past was never forgotten. Back in 2012 when the Arrow first started to become a thing, he was still known as The Hood and dropped bodies right and left. Only in October 2013, the Hood turned into the Arrow and committed himself to a non-killing-rule that was broken occasionally, though. Queen was freed of any suspicions of being the Hood back in autumn 2012. The terroristic destruction of the Glades, also known as the Undertaking, was followed by a five-month-break of the Hood which he returned from with his new name and new attitude. Queen’s mother confessed her involvement in the planning of the attack alongside the head of the attack, Malcolm Merlyn, but was found not guilty by a jury in autumn 2013. The attack caused the lives of 503 people, including the one of Merlyn’s son, Tommy Merlyn, who was known as Queen’s best friend. Whether or not the death of his best friend led to the new way of approaching the increasing crime is, at least so far, still left for speculation, but sounds reasonable. That is, if Queen is indeed the masked vigilante. Neither the police nor the prosecuting attorney’s office was willing to make an official statement to any of this yet. Rumors from inside the SCPD has it that Queen verified his assertion with insiders that were only known by the police, but continues to stay quiet about who’s under the other masks and-_

The TV was switched off, but Felicity didn’t look away. She was sure that, if she did, she’d see John holding the remote. He had probably grabbed it as soon as he had noticed her standing in the frame of the door. Even if he had noticed her any sooner, he wouldn’t have gotten to hide this from her, though.

“They aren’t airing anything else,” Felicity whispered, still staring at the black monitor of the TV with almost blind eyes. “Even the kids’ channels interrupted their usual program for this. Susan Williams still stayed quiet, though. Some other Channel 52 journalist reports about this, but nothing about the evidence she tried to blackmail me with.”

“Did you reach William?” John asked. “He shouldn’t see it on the news.”

Only now did Felicity look away from the turned off monitor and looked at her friends. John was sitting on the couch, his elbows propped up onto his knees and the remote in his hand. Laurel was standing behind him, her arms crossed in front of her chest. Thea was sitting in one of the armchairs, her hands rubbing up and down her baby bump. Only nine weeks were separating her from the birth of her baby. No wonder, Roy was sitting on the armrest, one hand stroking over his wife’s short hair almost soothingly.

“I tried to call him, but he doesn’t pick up. Samantha’s phone always goes straight to voicemail and their landline hasn’t been working for months,” Felicity replied. “I left him a dozen messages to call me as soon as he reads the texts.”

Felicity pulled at the sleeves of Oliver’s hoodie that she was wearing and wrapped her arms around herself almost protectively. She had been feeling nauseated since Oliver had left the house in the middle of the night. After she had called John, she had tried to calm Addie down, but her little girl had been wide awake after the few hours of sleep. That had only increased when first John and then the rest of her friends and family had come here. Only fifteen minutes ago, shortly before six, she had fallen back asleep.

“Is there anything new?” Felicity asked.

Once everyone had been here after John had called them, Felicity had told them the entire story. Everyone was in surprise and probably a little in shock about what had happened. They had tried to figure out what to do, but they hadn’t come up with any ideas yet.

“I talked to my dad,” Laurel replied. “He says Liam is going to press charges even though he isn’t entirely convinced about it. Oliver’s admission made it hard to just ignore it, though.”

“Great boyfriend you have there,” Thea whispered.

“He’s just doing his job,” Laurel replied. “It’s not like he has much of a choice-“

“And yet he presses charges.”

“Okay, stop it,” John said firmly. “This isn’t going to help anyone. Oliver turned himself in. Of course they are pressing charges now. We need to find a way to stop this before it’s getting worse.”

“Which we suck at so for,” Roy added. “It would be easier if we at least knew what Oliver has told the police, so we could come up with a story that matches his admission.”

John turned to Laurel. “Can you ask your dad or your boyfriend if Felicity we can have a few minutes with him?”

“Sure,” Laurel replied with a nod. Pulling her phone from the pocket of her jacket, she headed to the kitchen. “I will get right onto it.”

Felicity looked at her watch and sighed. Figuring out how to solve this situation right now was important, but it wasn’t even priority. Oliver had enough experience with police to stall them. The most important thing right now seemed to be figuring out what to do with the kids. The news of Oliver’s admission had spread like wildfire. There was no way she could let them leave the house today.

“Emmy will have to get up to go to school soon.”

“Do you want her to go to school?” John asked.

“I could go with her and keep the paparazzi away,” Roy suggested. “Normality is probably the best for the kids right now, right?”

“I doubt there is anything normal about this,” Felicity replied. “I am going to keep all of them home.”

“Does Raisa know about all of this yet?” Thea asked.

Felicity nodded. “When I put Addie back to bed, I ran into her and told her what happened. She’s going to stay. She said she always suspected something like this.”

“Raisa just always knew her,” Thea said with a smile. She took in a deep breath and frowned, though. “I don’t understand why the Dragon Lady did this. It makes no sense at all.”

“I know,” Felicity replied. She went to the couch and sat down there with a deep sigh. Resting her head against John’s shoulder, she repeated, “I know.”

“So, the kids are taken care of here. That’s good. I am going to ask Lyla to borrow you one or two of her agents, so someone is always here and ensures their security. That way, we can go to the lair and clear everything off there before the photos leak,” John suggested. “I guess the police will come to talk to you soon by the way.”

“I doubt it,” Felicity replied. “Bruce texted me that he has an army of lawyers shielding the kids and me. In case they freeze our bank accounts or we need help in any way, we should let him know.”

“That’s very nice of him,” Thea said.

Felicity smiled. “He’s a good friend. He might act like he hates Oliver, but they just like to get into each other’s hairs.”

There was a long moment of silence. Felicity laced her fingers through John’s and closed her eyes for a moment. She was incredibly tired. The few hours of sleep she had caught in the last night had barely been enough to make good for the tiredness of the long day before. It was far from being enough to help getting her through the exhaustions of this day.

“Do you want to go upstairs and sleep for a few hours?” John asked like he had read her mind.

Quickly, Felicity straightened up and rubbed her hand over her face. “No, I can’t. We need to start working on this, but first I need to talk to the kids. Well, at least the two of them that actually understand this.”

“What about Curtis?” Roy asked. “Should we ask him to help us?”

“He’s on vacation in Ireland with his husband,” Felicity replied.

“Well, at least he’s far away from here and probably won’t see much of what is going on here,” Thea said with a sigh.

“I doubt that the international news will miss the opportunity to tell a story like this,” John replied. “Thea, if this is too much for you-“

“My brother being arrested is too much for me, but sitting back and doing nothing is not going to help me either,” Thea interrupted their friend. “I am fine and I am just going to be even better when Oliver is back here with all of us.”

Roy shot John a look over the top of his wife’s head, shaking his head slightly. Thea seemed to be just as much against being put in cotton wool as Felicity had been when she had been pregnant and healthy.

When Felicity’s phone rang, she quickly grabbed it and looked at the display. Her mother’s face was smiling at her, making her heart sink. During all these years, she had never told her mother that Oliver was the Arrow or even that she was working with him. Basically, everyone but Donna had known for years, actually been involved in their work one way or the other. She didn’t want to tell her mother about this now. She had no idea how she would react since her mother had managed to surprise her a lot in the last years. Yet, she didn’t want to test if her mother’s understanding was enough for something like this too.

“It’s my mom,” Felicity said.

“Don’t you want to take it?” Roy asked.

“Not really,” Felicity replied and bit down on her bottom lip, her thumb already hovering over the display to reject the call.

“Let me handle that,” Thea suggested, holding out her hand. “I am sure I will find a way to calm her down.”

Felicity hesitated only shortly before she handed her sister-in-law the phone. “Tell her the truth. Just… try to do it carefully.”

Thea nodded, took the phone and left the living room, already taking the call. Felicity looked after her for a moment, more than grateful that she had a family like this that was having her back. She didn’t know how else she’d do this today.

“Okay, I talked to my dad and Liam,” Laurel said when she came back in a moment later. “You can talk to him for ten minutes, but better make it five.”

Felicity nodded. “I am going upstairs to talk to Emmy and Tommy, change into something else and then we can leave.”

Without waiting for any further response, Felicity got up and hurried upstairs. She had just reached the top of the stairs when Raisa stepped out of Millie’s room, holding the toddler pressed to her side.

“Mama!” Millie called out, holding out her hands for her mother.

Felicity smiled, even if it was a little tense. She stepped closer to Raisa and kissed Millie’s head without taking the baby over.

“I was just on my way downstairs to get the breakfast ready before waking up Emmeline and Thomas,” Raisa explained. “Camille was already awake.”

“I am going to wake up Emmy and Tommy now,” Felicity replied, taking in a deep breath, “to tell them what happened.”

“It’s no easy task.”

“No, it’s not,” Felicity agreed, “but it’s necessary. I am going to visit Oliver later. I will call the school from the car and tell them Emmy won’t come for now.”

Raisa nodded. “I have already gathered some ideas to distract the children.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied. “I have no idea what I’d do without you.”

Raisa smiled. “Focus on getting Oliver back. I will take care of the children.”

Felicity nodded, and Raisa pulled her against her for a short hug. Felicity allowed herself to close her eyes for a brief moment and take some deep breath. Only then did she let go of the woman that had grown part of her family in just a few weeks. They shared another look before their continued their ways, Raisa downstairs and Felicity to the kids’ rooms. She hadn’t even reached the door to Tommy’s room yet when Emmy came out of her room.

“Mommy?” she asked, rubbing a hand over her eyes. “Who are the people in front of our house?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. Of course, Emmy had already seen the reporters. She was old enough to pull up the shutters and open her window when she got up in the morning. Her room allowed sight on the street, unlike Millie’s and Addie’s rooms from where you could look into the garden.

“Come here,” Felicity said gently and reached out her hand for Emmy. “I need to talk to your brother and you.”

“Did something happen?” Emmy asked, taking her mother’s hand.

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a sigh. “That is why I need to talk to Tommy and you. Let’s wake him up.”

Felicity opened the door to Tommy’s room, finding her son still fast asleep in his bed. He had one arm put over his face, his right foot dangling over the mattress. It elicited the briefest of a smile from Felicity.

“Hey, Buddy,” Felicity whispered, sitting down at the edge of the bed. Emmy climbed onto her lap while Felicity stroked her hand up and down Oliver’s forearm gently. “Tommy, it’s time to wake up.”

Tommy groaned, but he stretched out his arms and legs. He looked at his mother with tired eyes. Felicity smiled, stroking her fingers over his cheek.

“Morning, Buddy,” she said.

“Morning,” Tommy replied. “You are here.”

Felicity smiled. She was often off to work already when the kids got up though she had done her best to make more time for them lately. With Oliver’s candidacy, her schedule had exploded, and she had just needed to sit down and make more time for her family to prevent work from snowing her in.

“Yes, mommy is not going to work today,” Felicity explained, “but I need to talk to you two because I will have to leave soon.”

“Where are you going?” Tommy asked.

“Something happened,” Emmy replied.

Slowly, Tommy sat up in bed and crawled over to Felicity. He snuggled to her side and Felicity put her arm around him. She kissed the top of his head, holding both her kids to her for a moment.

“Will you be away for long?” Tommy asked.

“No,” Felicity replied immediately. “I will just be away for a few hours I guess. If you need me, I will be right back. It’s… It’s about daddy.”

“Is he dead?” Emmy asked.

“What? No,” Felicity replied quickly, shaking her head. She pulled back a little, looking at her kids. Her heart ached that Emmy could even think something like that, but she also knew that the thought wasn’t even that absurd. Still, she didn’t want her kids to think like that. She didn’t even like that they could think that, so she made sure her voice was very firm when she repeated, “No, he’s not dead. Daddy is fine. He’s just… he’s with the police.”

“Why?” Emmy and Tommy asked at the same time, both looking at her with wide eyes.

“Someone found out that daddy is the Arrow,” Felicity replied, “so daddy felt it was best to go to the police and tell them.”

“So, they know he’s a hero now?” Emmy asked.

Felicity sighed. “The problem is that not everyone sees him as a hero.”

“I will go to school and tell everyone that-“

“You can’t go to school for now, Sweetie,” Felicity replied. “For now, it’s best for you to stay home with Raisa. I don’t want you to tell anyone about this. John, the rest of the team and I will work on something, so daddy is back home with us soon, okay?”

“But, mommy, isn’t it best to say the truth?” Tommy asked.

Felicity smiled sadly. “Usually I’d agree, but sometimes we have to lie a little to protect the people we love, you know?”

Emmy and Tommy nodded.

“So, when does daddy come back home?” Emmy asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know yet. Soon, hopefully. We just gotta be a little patient. It’s okay when you’re sad, though. I am sad right now too.”

Emmy smiled sadly and nodded. Tears were welling in both her children’s eyes and Felicity pulled them close into a tight hug. She felt her own eyes welling with tears at her kids’ sadness. She had been a fool to believe she’d ever be able to leave Oliver, even if it was for his own good. If she had managed to look past her own broken heart, she had never been able to bear the thought of her kids’ or Oliver’s broken hearts. She was barely able to bear it now that it wasn’t even she herself who had brought this pain over her children in the first place.

There was just nothing worse for a mother than seeing your kids this sad.

 

 

“Like I said, ten minutes,” Laurel whispered to her as she led Felicity through the police station, “but the sooner we get out of here again, the better. It’s never good when it looks like some suspects have special advantages and with Liam and my dad in charge, it’s easy to blame it on them and take the case away from them which would make it even harder to get to him.”

Felicity nodded, feeling her heart beating up into her throat. When they passed Quentin, he just smiled at them shortly, the smile not even reaching his eyes, and nodded to the door. Felicity took in a deep breath before she took hold of the door handle and stepped into the interrogation room. She closed the door behind herself quickly.

Oliver lifted his head and looked at her, surprise in his eyes. “Hey. What are you doing here?”

“Laurel convinced Liam to give me ten minutes with you,” Felicity replied. “She said we should rather make it five, though.”

She approached Oliver quickly and put her hands to his, trying to ignore that they were handcuffed to the table. She leaned forward and kissed Oliver’s lips gently. Her free hand came to stroke through the short hair at the back of his neck. Though Felicity felt the desperate need to deepen the kiss and take everything she got from him, she knew now wasn’t the time and here wasn’t the place. Hence, the kiss stayed chaste. When their lips parted, they looked at each other for a moment, their gazes holding the confession of deep love that the kiss hadn’t allowed to carry in this depth. Eventually, Felicity walked around the table and sat down on the other side, keeping her hands in his.

“How are you doing?”

The question was just whispered, barely audible. Felicity knew it was a stupid question to ask given where he was and why he was here. Yet, she knew that she had to ask.

“I’m okay, but it wouldn’t matter even if I wasn’t. I decided to do this, so I will have to live with the consequences,” Oliver replied, his voice firm despite being lowered to a whisper. “What about you and the kids? Do they know what happened? Does William know?”

“I tried to call him, but I haven’t reached him yet,” Felicity replied. “Emmy and Tommy know. We have a bunch of reporters standing in front of ours house and watching our every move, so I took Emmy out of school and had to tell them. I am sure the police is going to show up sooner or later too, but Bruce’s lawyers are taking care of it for now, so the kids and I are left alone. I told Raisa. She said she suspected something like this and agreed to stay with us no matter what. I might ask her to take the kids to Gotham for as long as things are tense here, but I am not sure yet. I don’t want to leave them, you know. I want them away from this mess, but not away from me. It’s hard for them as it is, and things just got started. I don’t want them to rip them out of their home. I just don’t want them out of harm’s way. With the press in front of our house, they are basically under arrest. With Bruce in Gotham they had his stately home with good security and a giant garden, but… I don’t know.”

“How are they doing?”

“I doubt that they really understand it yet. They… I don’t know… They are sad and scared.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, fighting the tears she felt threatening to well in her eyes at the memory of her crying kids. Oliver lowered his eyes for a moment and she could see the hurt in his face when he looked back up at her. There was a part of Felicity that just wanted to ask what he had been thinking, but she knew they didn’t have much time and he’d only repeat the things he had told her last night already. Felicity took in a deep sigh, squeezing his fingers.

“What did you tell them?” she asked then. “Or what are you going to tell them? In case we ever come up with a plan, we should make up something that works with what you told them.”

“I told them that I learned to do this in my five years away without going into details. I talked about the island, but not about Hongkong or Russia,” Oliver replied. “I told them about the list my father gave me and why I stopped killing after Tommy’s death and some things that happened after like the guy I killed when Foster and Cupid abducted Emmy, Tommy and you. We made a pause, but I am sure the interrogation is going to go on before I am being brought before the judge and taken to Iron Heights.”

Felicity’s stomach twists painfully at that words. She didn’t want to imagine Oliver in Iron Heights. She knew he could take care of himself, so physically, it wouldn’t be too hard to fight the criminals he had put in there. Emotionally, being caged in a cold cell somewhere far away from his family was going to bring to his limits. Oliver felt the safest when he had Felicity and their kids at his side. It was the only way he could really calm down and relax.

“Did you tell them about the lair?” Felicity asked in a whisper.

Oliver shook his head. “I am trying to buy as much time as possible before I tell them about it. Since Susan Williams is probably going to publish the photos soon anyway, you should remove all your fingerprints and so on.”

Felicity nodded. “It’s on my list of things to do. John and Roy are actually there already to work on that.”

“Good,” Oliver whispered.

“Susan Williams is suspiciously quiet so far, though,” Felicity added after a moment. “She didn’t call me and complain that I didn’t give in. She also doesn’t report on this topic at all.”

“That’s weird.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I know. It only proves my suspicion that she isn’t the one who’s actually behind this. There is more. I am sure of it. None of this makes sense.”

“If there is more to know, you will find out about it,” Oliver assured her and squeezed her fingers, smiling encouragingly and full of belief. “Just be careful and don’t do anything without backup.”

“I won’t,” Felicity replied. “I promise.”

“Good.” Oliver took in a deep breath, shooting her a halfhearted smile. “Our kids shouldn’t lose both parents.”

“They are not losing you,” Felicity whispered firmly. “I will figure out a way and then you will be home with us again. This, turning yourself in without any plan in mind to get you back out, probably wasn’t the smartest idea, but I am really smart, so I will figure out a way how to fix this.”

Oliver stroked his thumbs over the knuckles of her hands slowly before he leaned forward and kissed her fingers. Felicity smiled, taking in a deep breath to keep the tears that were welling in her eyes from falling. She knew that they didn’t have much more time and there were so many things she wanted to tell and ask him, but she didn’t know how.

“Should I ask Bruce to send one of his lawyers here?” Felicity asked. “It feels weird if you are taken in front of the judge without a lawyer. Maybe they can negotiate something good. You weren’t brought to Iron Heights in 2012 either. You turned yourself in, so there is little to no risk of flight and-”

“I doubt they would let me go,” Oliver interrupted her. “They could think this is all a ruse to distract from something and with the others still out there, they won’t consider that. I don’t see any sense in hiring a lawyer.”

“Should I come to the hearing?” Felicity asked, her fingers holding onto his even more tightly. “I don’t want you to be there alone.”

“I am getting along,” Oliver told her. “I’d rather have you working on figuring out what Susan Williams’ next steps will be and taking care of the kids. Besides, in case this will all end badly, you can still say you just don’t want anything to do with me anymore.”

“Not going to happen,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “I am not going to pretend that I am not on your side.”

“Look, I’m not saying that it will end badly,” Oliver whispered, “or that I want you to pretend not being on my side anymore, but it would be better for you and for the kids. You will just say that you thought I was still old Ollie, who’s cheating, but knowing that I am the Arrow is too much to take for you and-“

When the door opened, and Laurel stuck her head in, Oliver stopped. Their friend looked regretful as she said, “Felicity, it’s time.”

Felicity nodded. “I’ll be outside in a minute.”

Laurel closed the door again, and Felicity felt her heart sink even more. She didn’t want to say goodbye to Oliver just yet, especially not after what he had just said. She knew she had to, though. Taking in a deep breath, Felicity went back around the table. She cupped Oliver’s face with her hands and stroked her thumbs over his cheekbones. Their eyes locked before they both leaned in, so their lips met in a soft kiss. It carried the bitter taste of goodbye. When their lips parted, Felicity nuzzled his nose. Only slowly did she pull away and look at Oliver, finding his eyes on hers already, so they locked intimately.

“I love you,” she told him, “and we vowed to love each other for better or for worse. This is probably one of the worse times and I wished you wouldn’t have done it, at least not before I could have drugged you, so we had an out, but we will stick through this together. I am not going to pretend that we aren’t on your side and you won’t try to convince me of something like that ever again or I swear to God I will ask Quentin to give me the key to your cell and kick your ass so hard that you will be a nursing case and have no choice but to stay with me. Understood?”

The slightest of a smile showed on Oliver’s lips. “Understood.”

“Good,” Felicity replied.

“And I love you too.”

Felicity smiled sadly and captured Oliver’s lips in another gentle kiss. When they broke apart, she rested her forehead against his, keeping her eyes squeezed shut. She took some deep breath, gathering her strength.

“You need to go,” Oliver reminded her in a whisper.

“I know,” Felicity whispered back.

“Just kiss me once more, then turn around and leave without looking back before the door is shut. It will make it easier.”

Felicity swallowed and nodded. She took in another deep breath before she did as he had suggested. She leaned in for another kiss, their closed lips touching gently. A quiet sob fell from her lips when she broke the kiss, but Felicity straightened up and turned around nonetheless. Only then did she open her eyes. Taking in another deep breath to gather herself, she walked to the door and left the interrogation room, leaving Oliver behind. A tear fell from her eye.

“Are you alright?” Quentin asked her, putting a hand to her shoulder.

“Do I look like I am alright?” Felicity asked back.

Quentin shot her an uncomfortable smile. “Sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Felicity replied quickly. She shook her head. “I have to go home. Sorry.”

He nodded. “Sure. I tell you if there is anything you need to know. Oh, and… your mom called a few times.”

“I’ll talk to her when I can. Just not now.” Felicity turned to Laurel. “Let’s go.”

 

 

“Roy, Laurel and John are almost finished at the lair. The place is cleared of any fingerprints and whatever else. All suits, except Oliver’s, and all equipment has been taken care of. They are taking everything to A.R.G.U.S. for now,” Thea said when she came into the kitchen and sat down on the “Have you found out anything yet?”

Felicity shook her head, not stopping to let her fingers dance over the keyboard. “Nothing yet. I am currently letting all the traffic cameras and whatever surveillance videos I have access to and try to find her or her car.”

After she and Laurel had left the precinct, they had gone to Susan Williams’ apartment, but it had been empty. They had even broken into the place to take a more thorough look inside. Her apartment had been in chaos like she had left hurriedly, most of her clothes and basically all personal stuff missing. A neighbor had confirmed that she had packed her things early in the morning and hurried away. Since then, Felicity was working on trying to find the Dragon Lady. Thea had come home to catch some rest and take care of the kids, while Laurel had joined John and Roy at Verdant.

“It makes no sense that she left,” Thea said, shaking her head. “Or is it just me?”

“Definitely not,” Felicity replied. “There is something more behind this. I don’t know what it is, but there is something. She’d have the perfect story with the photos she has. Even with Oliver turning himself in, if she’s the one who publishes the evidence first, she is going to get a thousand job offers.”

“Yet, she chose to blackmail you and left.”

“Exactly.” Felicity sighed. “None of this makes sense and-“

When Felicity’s phone rang, she stopped and quickly took a look at the display. Her heart raced in her chest at the name blinking there.

“Your mom again?” Thea asked.

“William,” Felicity replied.

She grabbed her phone quickly and went over to the living room, leaving Thea and Raisa alone in the kitchen. She sat down on the backrest of the couch and took in a deep breath before she took the call.

“William, hi.”

“Is it true?” he asked immediately, crashing all of Felicity’s hopes that maybe he hadn’t heard abut what had happened yet. “Is dad the Arrow?”

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut. She didn’t want to talk to him over the phone, but she knew there was no other chance. The only good thing was that she knew the phone was safe. It didn’t make it much better, though.

“Yes. Yes, it’s true.”

“But… why? And since when and… how?”

“Those are all very good questions,” Felicity replied, “and I promise you that I will answer every single one of them.”

“Just not now?” William asked, and Felicity didn’t miss the disbelief in his voice. He thought she was stalling him. “One day when there is time? In a few months maybe?”

“No,” Felicity replied firmly. “I am going to tell you this soon, as soon as we see each other actually. This is not something to talk about on the phone, though. There are a lot of things I will have to tell you and you will have a lot of questions. Talking about this over the phone won’t be good. Please trust me on this one.”

There was a long moment of silence. Felicity bit down on her tongue, squeezing her eyes shut. She could only hope that William would trust her enough to believe her.

“Do the others know?”

“You mean your siblings?” Felicity asked. When William confirmed, she replied, “Yes, Emmy and Tommy know.”

“So, you told them, but you didn’t tell me?”

“No, it wasn’t like that,” Felicity replied. “At least not really. We- We never really planned on telling them. It was just that we were- Can we please talk about this when you are here? Can you come here? Will your mom allow you to come?”

“I don’t care what my mom thinks. I am coming to Starling. I want to know the truth now.”

“Hey, you are fifteen. You will tell your mom that you want to come here and not just run away,” Felicity said firmly, “and only then you will come here. Just text me or someone else here, so we can pick you up from the station or from wherever. I don’t want you to come here on your own. The reporters are lurking around the house like vultures. I don’t want you to get into any trouble. Okay?”

“Okay,” William replied even if she could hear the annoyance in his voice. Teenager at his age didn’t like to be told that they couldn’t so something on their own. “Fine.”

“I promise you that, as soon as you are here, we are going to sit down together, and I will tell you whatever you want to know. Every questions, no matter what it is, I will answer it.”

“Okay,” William said once more.

“Okay,” Felicity repeated.

For a long moment, they just stayed at the phone without saying anything. Felicity wished she didn’t have to tell William the truth like this. She wished it hadn’t been a situation leading to him finding out, but a quiet afternoon that she and Oliver could have sit down with him and tell him the truth. They knew they had been lucky to get away with it as long as they had, but they hadn’t wanted to exhaust their luck and risk that one of the kids spilled the news to him or he’d get behind it when she and/or Oliver left the house in the middle of the night. She and Oliver had talked about it a few times, but they had never decided on whether or when exactly they’d tell him for various reasons.

“Felicity?” William asked after a while.

“Yes?”

“Did he- I mean… Is dad- Is he a-“

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She knew what William wanted to ask, but she didn’t even know how to answer to that. Yes, Oliver had killed people, but saying that he was a killer was… it sounded wrong to Felicity. Logically, people who killed were killers, but it just didn’t fit for Oliver. It wasn’t that easy. There was more to it.

William cleared his throat. “What do I tell my mom?”

Felicity was relieved that she had a little more time to think about what exactly to say to William about Oliver’s past actions. Yet, the questions he asked her wasn’t that much easier. It was one of the questions that had always arose when she and Oliver had discussed telling him the truth.

“I’m a mother myself and I know I wouldn’t want my children to lie to me or anyone to tell my kids that they have to lie to me, so I know I can’t ask you to lie to your mom,” Felicity replied.

“She’s at work now and hasn’t seen the news yet I guess. She won’t let me see you guys anymore if she knows.”

“Probably,” Felicity whispered. “It’s a lot to take in and I am not sure I’d let my kid near people I’d learn those shocking things about.”

There was a long pause. Felicity wasn’t sure what to say. She really couldn’t tell William that he should lie to Samantha. On the other hand, she wasn’t sure they’d ever get to see William again if she knew the truth. It had taken so long for her to trust them enough to let William come to Starling. If she learned about their nightly activity, who knew what she’d do.

“Can we keep it between us at first?” William asked. “At least as long as I don’t know the whole story?”

“Okay,” Felicity replied.

“Okay,” William repeated and after a short pause added, “I need to go. I need to head off my English teacher and tell her I am sick and need to go home.”

Felicity nodded. “Okay. Be safe and call if anything is going on.”

“I will,” William replied.

“Okay. See you soon.”

“See you soon.”

Felicity waited until William had hung up before she dropped her phone into the cushions of the couch. She hid her face in her hands for a moment, trying to hold back the tears. Why did everything seem to fall apart right now and how the hell was she supposed to handle all of this? Oliver turning himself in was hard as it was, but with William and her mother and everyone else they had kept this secret from finding out now, it was so much more than just the fear of losing her husband, not that that alone wouldn’t be hard enough to handle. It was-

When an ear-piercing screech came from upstairs, Felicity didn’t hesitate. She bolted towards the stairs, intending to find out what had happened that has caused Millie to screech like that.

“What was that?” Thea asked from the door to the kitchen, looking worried.

“Something’s wrong with Millie.”

She ran up the stairs without even looking back. She had sent the kids upstairs to play together. Only Addie was downstairs and keeping Raisa company while she was cooking them lunch. She had just reached the top of the stairs, when the kids came running towards her, Emmy holding both of her little siblings on her hands. Felicity sank down on her knees and let the kids run into her arms. Millie and Tommy were crying, while Emmy just looked frightened.

“What happened?” she asked her oldest daughter.

“There is a man,” Emmy replied, tears welling in her eyes too now.

“Where?” Felicity asked with tense voice.

“At the window,” Emmy replied, looking to the open door to Millie’s room. “He took photos.”

“Go downstairs to Thea and Raisa,” Felicity asked the kids.

“Come here,” Thea said at that moment, stepping to the bottom of the stairs.

Felicity tightened her arms around her kids for another moment before he let go of them. While Tommy and Emmy went downstairs, Thea quickly climbed the few steps to take Millie with her.

As soon as Millie was in her aunt’s arms, Felicity hurried to Millie’s bedroom. She was just in time to see a reporter, his camera wrapped around his shoulder, climbing down the growth support for climbing plants they had planted there. It had been Emmy’s idea after Deepa had planted those flowers at her home too. Oliver hadn’t been enthusiastic about it at first, but Felicity had convinced him to let the kids have some fun with seeing the flowers grow. She hadn’t thought anyone would use it to hurt them. Only know she realized that maybe it hadn’t been a good idea to have a growth support lead right to one of the kids’ bedroom.

Felicity looked around the room and at the toys the kids had just dropped out of fear when they had run away from the man who had photographed them. Here in their home and in their rooms, they were supposed to be safe and protected. Right now, that didn’t seem to be the case, though.

“We can’t stay here.”


	261. The team's investigations

“I didn’t think I’d see this place ever again,” Thea said with a sigh while Felicity was directing the car up the driveway to the mansion. “I didn’t even know the mansion was built back up. I thought it burnt down the summer after mom died.”

Felicity nodded slowly. “It did. I was here with Oliver the night after it burnt down to watch the ruins. When Ray took over Queen Consolidated, he had no use for what was left of the mansion. He thought about selling it, but the legal department advised against it for some reason. When Oliver ran for mayor in 2019, I started rebuilding it in secret without telling anyone.”

“Why?” Thea asked. “I thought you and Ollie never considered moving out of your house.”

“We didn’t,” Felicity agreed, shaking her head slightly. “That’s the house Oliver built for me and our family and I would have regretted it for the rest of my life if I had given up on that house to be honest.”

“Yet, you let the mansion be built back up.”

Felicity nodded and sighed. She turned her head to look out the window at the mansion. Admittedly, she hadn’t built the mansion back up the way it had been. She had made some changes to make the interior a little friendlier. With the dark wood and carpets, the mansion had always reminded her more of a haunted house instead of family home. The mansion was friendlier now, more suited for a family, but it was still the stately home it used to be and, hence, quite different from the comfy home Oliver had built for them. There was something intimate about their house that the mansion was missing.

“I was worried about what would happen once he became mayor,” Felicity replied. “You know, with the bored life he had, he wasn’t that interesting for the media anymore. If he had become mayor, their interest might have been reawakened, so I figured maybe it was time to move to somewhere more protected. With our money and our nighttime jobs and your family’s history, I thought maybe it was better to shield the kids a little more, maybe hire some security to make sure nothing happened to them.”

Thea smiled, stroking her hand over her baby bump. Felicity knew that Thea understood the overwhelming need to protect your children. Her baby wasn’t born yet, but it didn’t have to be for her to know that need already. For Felicity, it had built the very first second, she had learned that she was pregnant. From that moment on, her kids’ safety and wellbeing had always been her priority. It had always come first.

“Have you thought about moving here now that Oliver is running for mayor again?”

Felicity smiled, but she shook her head. “No. I think I feel safer and more at peace as I did four years ago. I know it sounds crazy because, compared to your brother, I am the most relaxed person in the world. I think I was more nervous about some things than I was ready to admit to myself a few years ago.”

“And now you’re not anymore?”

“I want my children to live a normal life, growing up in a normal home,” Felicity replied.

Thea chuckled. “You don’t consider the mansion normal?”

“No, that is far away from anything that the real world is,” Felicity responded. “Well, the real world isn’t really nice to me right now, though, given that Oliver is in prison.”

Though she said it with a chuckle, she felt her stomach sink at her words. Suddenly, all the pain and the messiness of the situation came back to her. For a few seconds, she had believed that escaping her home that didn’t feel like her home without Oliver was enough to make her forget and to take the pain away for just a little while. Of course, it hadn’t been enough.

When Felicity noticed some movement in the rearview mirror, she shot a brief look into it. Clearing her throat, she stated, “John and the others are coming.”

“Can we get out now, Mommy?” Tommy asked.

“Wait a second, Buddy,” Felicity asked. She watched the iron gate at the end of the driveway close before she turned her head back to Tommy and Millie on the rear bench seats. “Okay, now you can get out.”

Tommy didn’t need to be told twice. He immediately unfastened his seatbelt and got out. While Thea quickly got out to keep Tommy from running too far away, Felicity helped Millie out of her seat and lifted the toddler into her arms. The little girl quickly held onto her mother tightly. She was still scared after what had happened with the reporter and very clingy because of it. Felicity kissed the top of her daughter’s head, wordlessly letting her know that she was not alone and that she wasn’t going to go away.

While Raisa, Emmy and John with Addie in his arms, approached her, Felicity turned to the house with another sigh, wondering if this had been the right decision. After she had come back downstairs from Millie’s nursery, Millie and Tommy had flung their arms around her legs and cried more. Felicity had comforted them until they had been willing to go to Raisa and Thea. Only then she had grabbed her phone and called some people to make sure they’d have everything they needed here. After that, she had called John and let him know that they had to leave the house and he should come back to help them move. Felicity had let everyone pack a few things and they had left. For a second, she had reconsidered her idea of sending the kids away for the time being until things had calmed down, but she knew it would only make it worse for them. Now, here they were.

“Mommy, is it true that this is the house where daddy grew up?” Emmy asked.

Felicity nodded, smiling at how excited Emmy was. Maybe the kids could be distracted with some stories of Oliver’s and Thea’s childhood as well as their grandparents Moira and Robert that they had never been fortunate enough to get to know.

“How about I show you and your siblings where your daddy used to sleep when he was a child?” Raisa asked, probably getting the same idea.

“Oh, yes!” Emmy exclaimed excitedly. “Tommy, Raisa shows us daddy’s old room. Are you coming too?”

Tommy nodded. “Okay.”

“What about you, Millie?” Felicity asked, bobbing her toddler up and down on her hip a little. “Do you want to go with Raisa and let her show you where daddy slept when he was your age?”

Millie tightened her hand to a fist in Felicity’s ponytail. “Mama.”

“Well, mommy’s not going with.”

Millie rested her head on Felicity’s shoulder. “Mama.”

“I could go with you,” Thea suggested, stepping in front of Millie.

Slowly, Millie lifted her head from her mother’s shoulder to look at her aunt. She played on her ear for a moment before she looked at Felicity, who smiled at her encouragingly. Millie released a sigh and reached out her hands for Thea, who took her over.

While Thea, Raisa and the kids went inside already, so Raisa could show the kids Oliver’s old bedroom and could tell them some stories about him, Felicity waited outside. When John stepped next to her, she took Addie from him and kissed her baby’s temple.

“I talked to Lyla,” he told her. “She is sending five of her agents here to keep an eye on all of you.”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied.

John smiled and squeezed her shoulder. “Not for that. It’s what you have friends for. Did you find anything new on Susan Williams’ location?”

Felicity shook her head. “No, but my computer is still running the search. Can you get the tech stuff from my car and set it up in the smaller living room? Maybe the search came up with something while we were coming here.”

“Yes, sure,” John replied.

“Thanks.”

Felicity released another sigh before she headed inside the house. She hadn’t been in the Queen Mansion very often for a lot of reasons, Moira Queen being one of them without any doubt. She had often felt intimidated by the successful, reserved woman. Then later on, after she had confronted her about Thea’s biological father, she had avoided her for other reasons, mainly because of what she had said to her back then about Oliver and her. Only then Felicity had become painfully aware of how much Oliver had really meant to her. The fact that he had just then gotten back with Sara, who had been able to hold herself in the field perfectly and had some scientific knowledge, hadn’t made it any easier.

“You know, I think Grandma Moira would have loved all of you very much,” Felicity told Addie, rubbing her hand up and down her youngest daughter’s back. “She always did everything for her family. That wasn’t always right, but it was what she thought she had to do to protect her children.”

Felicity hadn’t particularly liked Moira after what had happened between them, but being a mother now also made her see what had driven that woman to be who she had been. Sometimes she wondered if she and Moira would have gotten along if they had gotten the chance to get to know each other as mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. They would have been family to each other after all, and Felicity knew now what it meant to be a mother and what it meant to want your children protected at any cost even though she hoped she’d never be forced to join into any terroristic attack to keep them safe.

When Addie whined slightly, Felicity held her daughter closer to her side and kissed her temple once more. Addie might be a baby, but she certainly could feel that something was wrong. Babies sensed that in their parents’ behavior and that they had spontaneously moved out wasn’t helping to hide it either Felicity guessed.

“I know,” she whispered against the side of Addie’s face. “I miss daddy too, but don’t you worry. Mommy is working on something, so we will hopefully get him back very, very soon.”

“And you think that is realistic?”

Felicity turned around quickly to see her mother standing in the frame of the door. She was dressed almost suspiciously casual in jeans and a simple shirt. She wore her hair down and almost no makeup. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest and almost wrapped around herself like she was trying to protect herself from something.

“Mom,” Felicity whispered.

“John let me in,” Donna replied like she had to explain herself. “I was at home and trying not to go crazy after what Thea told me. Then Quentin called to tell me what has happened with that reporter and that you were temporarily moving in here, so I figured it was time to see you and talk to you in person.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue and nodded slowly. When she had left to see Oliver this morning, Thea had still been talking to Donna on the phone and after everything that had happened this noon, Felicity had forgotten to ask her what exactly she had told her mother.

“What exactly did Thea tell you?” Felicity asked.

“She said that it’s true,” Donna replied, “that Oliver is that vigilante.”

“Yes, it’s true.”

Felicity watched her mother’s reaction closely. She seemed to be in shock like only Felicity’s confirmation convinced her of the truth now and Thea’s words before hadn’t been enough. When her legs started shaking slightly, Felicity quickly approached her mother and put a hand to her elbow. She led her over to the couches.

“Sit down,” she suggested.

Donna let herself fall into the cushions, looking like she had seen a ghost. Her face was pale, her bottom lip trembling slightly. Felicity felt her heart beating up into her throat. If her mother was reacting like this, she didn’t want to imagine how much worse it was going to be for William. The last person they had let in on their secret had been Curtis and he had been so excited that Felicity had almost forgotten what it was like for people to not like the Arrow or seem his as the killer he once had been. Admittedly, Curtis probably hadn’t felt like he had been lied to for years, unlike Donna and William.

“Do you need a glass of water?” she asked, feeling almost a little helpless. “Or anything else?”

“No,” Donna replied, almost snapping at her daughter and making Addie release a low cry in the process. That seemed to remind her to calm down a little. “Felicity, what is going on here? How can Oliver be that vigilante and why does it seem like nobody but me is shocked about it?”

Felicity held Addie closer to her side. She nodded shortly before she sat down on the couch on the other side of the table with Addie on her lap. She should probably consider this a dry run for when she had to tell William.

“When the Gambit went down, Robert and Oliver made it to the rescue boat,” Felicity explained, figuring she should start where it had all begun without going too much into detail. “He told him that he wasn’t a good man and he wasn’t the man Oliver thought he was. He gave him a book with names and asked him to right his wrongs before he… before he killed himself.”

Donna played with the lapels of her jeans jacket nervously. Her eyes widened even more if that was even possible.

“But Oliver said his father drowned.”

“He didn’t want anyone, not even his family, to know that his father killed himself, so he could live,” Felicity almost whispered. “He felt guilt about it, too guilty to talk about it. He told John and me eventually and then Thea and Roy later on. He doesn’t like to talk about it. He doesn’t like to talk about anything that happened in his five years away, but a lot happened to him. You have seen his torso and all the scars it carries. Let’s just say it’s only tells of a fraction of what Oliver has been through.”

Oliver had known that she had to tell people when he had turned himself in. He had told her to tell William and, even though he hadn’t specifically said it, Felicity was sure that he wouldn’t mind that she’d tell Donna. Yet, Felicity didn’t want to go into detail. It was Oliver’s story after all and a lot of the things Felicity knew, only she knew. Over the years since they had gotten together, he had opened up to her and told her one story at a time. He trusted her with everything he had been through because she would keep his secrets. She knew she would have to tell William if he asked, but her mother could be left in the dark about some things. Not even John or Thea knew all of the stories after all.

“So, Oliver came back and started killing all these people because of what his father did?”

“He tried to do what his father had asked of him,” Felicity agreed with a nod of her head. “He wanted to right his wrongs and that book with names was the only clue. He tried to help the people in the city, but the only way he had learned how to do that was with more violence than he could emotionally endure. He was… he was never proud of what he had done, but he didn’t see it as the only way possible. After the Undertaking and his best friend’s death, Oliver realized that he couldn’t do this anymore. He wanted to give up completely, but I asked him to find another way and he did. He started chasing criminals and dropped them off at the police station instead of working off the names on the list. With time, the team grew and got more efficient. There are basically two teams operating now which gives everyone the time they need for their families and only when big things happen everyone goes out.”

Felicity lowered her eyes for a moment when Addie tugged a strand of her hair. Quickly, she put her ponytail on her other shoulder when the little girl was about to put her mother’s hair in her mouth. All her children had liked to use her hair as a pacifier when they had been this age. Addie grumbled unhappily, but she went over to playing with her feet instead. After smiling at her daughter for a moment longer, Felicity lifted her gaze, her eyes meeting her mother’s. She was still pale, and she was shaking her head slightly like she still couldn’t believe it.

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” Felicity stated.

“A lot indeed,” Donna said. “I mean… how do you fit into all of this? When did you find out? And how could you live with this?”

“Oliver came to me for some favors with the most terrible excuses. He gave me a bullet-riddled laptop to rescue data from and a syringe with an alleged energy drink,” Felicity said with the slightest of a smile on her lips at the memory. “Then one day, he was bleeding in my car in his leathers after his mother shot him.”

“His mother shot him?”

“It’s… a long story,” Felicity just replied, shrugging her shoulders. “He asked me to join the team and I did. At first, I just wanted to help saving his stepdad because he was my boss and he was nice to me. Then I figured all the good we could do and stayed. Then we got to know each other, fell in love and the rest is basically history.”

Donna shook his head once more, leaning forward a little. Her voice was lowered to a whisper when she said, “Felicity, he killed people. How could you work with him? How could you have built a family with him?”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. Her mother had always said that she supported the Arrow. She had said he was doing good. For some reason, it seemed to be something different if it was someone you knew, though. It was like with the people who said they supported refugee homes, yet protested when they were built in their neighborhood.

“Mom, he is still Oliver, my Oliver or our Oliver,” Felicity replied. “From the moment I met him, I knew he was a good person with a good heart. Otherwise I wouldn’t have let go of his terrible excuses and helped him. What I told you about Oliver just now does not change anything about the man you have gotten to know. He is still the man that built a house for our family. He is still the perfect husband that supports me no matter what and that helped me through some of my most difficult times. He is still the amazing father who’d never leave his children and who will always be there. He is still the same, mom. He just took care of the city and the people who live here in more ways than you knew before.”

“By killing criminals?”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. Her mother didn’t want to understand.

“Mom-“

“Felicity, you do realize that this is crazy, right?” Donna asked her urgently. “Oliver-“

“-is still the same man that I chose to get married to and have a family with,” Felicity interrupted her mother. “And if you can’t see that, then you’re wrong.”

She felt tears welling in her eyes because it always hurt her when people talked about Oliver like he was a criminal and a bad person instead of the hero he was. It had taken so long for him to see himself as something else than the killer people had tried to make him believe he was. He had pushed people away, worried that he would infect them with his darkness.

“So, you want to honestly tell me that you don’t see any problem with Oliver’s past, not for you and not for your kids?”

Felicity didn’t hesitate. “There is no problem, Mom. I knew who Oliver was when I fell in love with him and I willingly chose to get married to him and have children with him. There is no better dad than him and I wouldn’t trust anyone with my kids more than I trust him. I know this is a lot for you to take in, but, if you just think about it for a while, you will see that I am right. Oliver is still the Oliver you got to know.”

“So, how-“

When John cleared his throat from where he was standing at the door, Felicity and Donna both looked at him. If the look on his face was any indication, he had found something.

“Sorry to interrupt,” John said, his eyes locking with Felicity’s, “but I think it’s time for some dragon hunt.”

Felicity straightened up a little. She looked at John’s face closely and was sure that she understood exactly what he meant. Her search had finally come up with something, so they knew where the Dragon Lady was.

“Okay, dragon hunt in the codeword for what exactly?” Donna asked, looking back and forth between John and Felicity.

“For me to leave,” Felicity replied. She got up quickly and kissed Addie’s cheek. “Raisa, Thea and the kids are upstairs. Can you-“

“-I wanted to spend some time with my grandkids and distract them from what is going on here anyway,” Donna said. She got up and took Addie from Felicity. “Come here, my little sweetheart.”

“I am not sure how long I will be away. Can you-“

“Raisa and I got everything handled even if Thea should have to leave too,” Donna assured her.

“Thanks, Mom,” Felicity said and quickly turned to John. As the hurried into the smaller living room, she whispered to him, “What did you find?”

“I didn’t find anything. Your search came up with it. Susan Williams checked into a hotel an hour from here,” John explained and gestured to her computer.

Felicity quickly typed a few commands, checking what her search had come up with. “It’s a small hotel, still close to the city but almost a little hidden. She paid cash. I guess she hoped we wouldn’t find her.”

“I suggest we go now, so we are back before the sun goes down.”

Felicity nodded. “Yes. Should we call the rest of the team?”

“We do that from the car,” John replied. “It’s better if we don’t show up with the entire team. A friendly talk is probably better than showing up with a bunch of weapons.”

“Well, we won’t bring weapons, but I am certainly not going to be friendly either.”

“I am not leaving my gun at home.”

“So weapons and no friendliness,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders. “Better keep the gun out of my reach though, I am not sure I can control myself when I see her.”

John shot her a short look before nodded as they walked to the front door with quick steps. When he looked away, his eyes followed Donna, who was just taking Addie upstairs, talking to the baby in some weird singsong.

“How did she take it?” John asked her.

“She was…” Felicity stopped. She didn’t want to think about the first few things she had said to her today. “She will have to accept it.”

 

 

“Who’s there?”

“Room service.”

She heard the steps on the other side of the door before it was opened. If the expression on Susan Williams’ face was any indication, she was everything but happy about her visitors. She puckered her lips, looking at Felicity and John with a sour look in her eyes.

“I probably should have known that you weren’t going to let me go that easily.”

“You should have,” Felicity replied, carelessly walking past her into the small hotel room, “but I didn’t count on it. You just don’t seem like one of the smartest people on earth.”

Susan William released a snort when she closed the door behind Felicity and John. She crossed her arms in front of her chest and leaned back against the door, just watching the two. Meanwhile, Felicity took a quick look around like maybe the hotel room alone would be enough to make her suddenly realize what was behind all of this. When she turned around without any success, she found the Dragon Lady’s eyes already on her.

“This was never my plan.”

Felicity snorted, crossing her arms in front of her chest, too. John just stepped back to the desk at the wall and sat down on the edge of it to just watch the two women fight this out on their own. Felicity didn’t doubt that he was taking her by her word and keeping his distance to keep his gun out of her reach too, though.

“I didn’t think it was,” Felicity replied bitterly. “I might not think the best of you and that’s actually me being nice, but I didn’t think you’d be stupid enough to use a story like that to blackmail me into leaving Oliver. What would you have from that?”

Ms. Williams didn’t seem amused about Felicity’s words. Her jaws were clenched, the expression on her face even sourer than before. Felicity bit down on her tongue, biting back the words about how she didn’t see how Susan Williams would be smart enough to even gather this evidence, though. She would like to say it, simply because of how much she hated the Dragon Lady. She knew she needed her good will to tell them what she knew though.

“So, whose idea was this?” Felicity asked.

“I don’t know their names,” the Dragon Lady replied, shrugging her shoulders. “These two guys came to my apartment and told me they had a job for me. I said I wasn’t interested, but they threatened me.”

Felicity frowned. Two guys had blackmailed her just like the Dragon Lady had blackmailed Felicity. Oliver had made a lot of enemies during his time away and since he had come back here. There were hundreds of people that probably hated him for something he had done to them or to one of their loved ones, no matter how bad they were. The fact that it was two men didn’t really help.

“What did they look like?” John asked.

The Dragon Lady shrugged her shoulders. “Both tall with dark hair, one older and the other younger. The older guy was the one who made the demands. The other just stood there and watched. They were masked for most of the times, but their eyes were full of hatred. It was spooky.”

“And you didn’t know them?” John asked.

“If I knew them, I would probably spend my time finding new friends,” she replied. Then she frowned. “The older guy looked kind of familiar, though. I think I might have seen his face on the news once.”

Felicity pursed her lips. She only thought about it for a second before she had an idea. She pulled her phone from her purse and called up a photo of Malcolm Merlyn. She held it out to the Dragon Lady and she nodded shortly. Pushing her tongue into her cheek, Felicity turned to John and showed him the photo. He took in a deep breath, his shoulder tensing.

“Why didn’t you publish the photos?” Felicity asked the Dragon Lady, pushing her phone back into her purse. “Even with Oliver turning himself in, this still would have been a great story. You had evidence that no other media had.”

“Yeah,” the Dragon Lady replied between clenched teeth. “That story and these photos could have earned me a lot of money and a reputation that would open me every door in the media world. Unfortunately, I wasn’t allowed to publish them. That guy was so angry when he learned that your husband turned himself in instead of you leaving him. I thought he was going to kill me. He held and arrow to my throat and yelled at me why the hell I didn’t prevent this from happening. He said I didn’t emphasize enough that your only chance was to leave him. When I told him that I could make it right and help him destroy your husband, he said I couldn’t and told me never to come back to Starling. It wasn’t like I had planned to do so, but after his last visit, I guess I will make a large bow around it for the rest of my life.”

“So, you still have the footage?”

“I deleted it,” Ms. Williams replied. “All of it. I don’t really have any desire to meet these guys again, so I figured it was best nobody ever saw the photos. If they ever get published, I don’t doubt they will turn up on my doorstep and kill me after all. I don’t even have copies anymore.”

“Good,” Felicity replied.

At least that was something she didn’t have to worry about any longer. Without the photos, there was no evidence that Oliver was the Arrow. There was his admission, but that could be withdrawn. Without factual evidence, it would be easier to prove his innocence.

It didn’t mean that they didn’t have enough problems, though. Oliver was still in Iron Heights and Merlyn and his little minion were running around the city and trying to destroy her or Oliver’s life, not that there was any difference. They needed to find out why Malcolm was doing this and why he was coming back now.

“Anything else you can tell us?” Felicity asked.

Ms. Williams snorted. “I basically told you who is behind this and that it wasn’t about getting your husband behind bars but about getting you two separated. What more do you want?”

Felicity didn’t like to admit it, but Susan Williams was probably right. This was already more than she had thought their talk would bring. She should probably just be grateful and leave.

“If you ever come back to Starling, I swear to God that Malcolm Merlyn will be the least of your problems,” Felicity said, stepping closer to the Dragon Lady. “Did I make myself clear?”

“Yes.”

“Good,” Felicity replied, emphasizing her words with a look before she beckoned for the Dragon Lady to leave her position in front of the door. She looked back over her shoulder to John then, nodding to the door as a sign that it was time to leave. “Goodbye forever!”

Felicity opened the door and walked right to the elevator without looking back. She hit the button to call the elevator, just looking at the closed doors in front of her.

“You okay?” John asked when he had caught up and came to stand next to her.

“Yes,” Felicity replied absentmindedly, waving with her head. “I am just thinking.”

“Malcolm Merlyn.”

“And whatever little minion he created,” Felicity replied. When the elevator doors opened, they stepped inside and hit the button for the ground floor. Leaning back against the cool wall of the cage, she added, “I never thought he’d come back, but I guess we should have known better. That guy never seems to really disappear, and he has a feeling for bad timing and dramatic entrances.”

“He does,” John agreed. “What do you think, why is he back now?”

Felicity thought about it for a moment. “The last time we saw him was when Oliver saved him from Nanda Parbat which clearly was a huge mistake. There was ever only one thing that has driven him, even if in sick and in non-comprehensible ways.”

“Thea,” John said, nodding his head. “With her pregnancy now, he probably thought it was time to get back in touch.”

“And just like in 2014 when he told Thea to shoot him and then trained her, so he could use her to kill Sara and set Oliver up against the League, he is doing it in the crappiest way possible.”

“By trying to destroy her brother’s life and accidentally making him end up in jail,” John added. He nodded slowly. “It would work with everything that had we know about him. He loves Thea in some twisted way, but he hates Oliver.”

“So, he tries to destroy Oliver’s family.”

“That way, maybe his is distracted enough, so Merlyn can try getting back closer to Thea.”

Felicity nodded. She did believe that in some twisted way, Merlyn really loved Thea. She knew that he had told her that he had seen more in her than he had ever seen in Tommy. In Malcolm’s world, he was probably the heroic dad who had tried to avenge his son’s mother’s murder by trying to erase the neighborhood she had died in. Then he had trained Thea, giving her everything she needed to protect herself. The lives of all the people dying during the Undertaking and the lives of the people the League had threatened to take had all been little prices to pay for him.

“Does Merlyn actually believe that he just has to get back in touch and everything with Thea will be alright again?” John asked.

Felicity shot him a brief look. She knew that John could answer all the questions himself. Everything he had let her say before, he knew himself. He had let her talk, though, because he knew that it relaxed her and distracted her. John knew her long enough to know things like that.

“I am sure he had more plans,” Felicity replied, “but unfortunately with Oliver turning himself in they are all crossed again. Merlyn would never do something like that. He would lie and sacrifice each of his loved ones for power or whatever else to save his own ass. It’s why he didn’t think I would tell Oliver or he would turn himself in. He doesn’t understand that kind of love.”

“I doubt Merlyn understands much about whatever kind of love,” John replied.

When the elevator doors opened, they stepped outside and walked through the foyer of the hotel to the doors. They had parked the car in a side street that was silent now. Not a single person was out there, but they could still hear the noises from the busy street that crossed it.

“As soon as we’re home, I am going to run a search on Merlyn,” Felicity explained while they were walking to the car. “He knows the city well, so it probably won’t be easy, but maybe we get lucky. Besides, if we don’t find his location, maybe we can at least find out who he’s working with, so we know what to expect. The way I see Merlyn, I doubt there is much to fear from his little minion, though. He probably looked for someone he can control which won’t really narrow down the number of possible suspects since he was trained by the League and-“

Felicity was still midsentence, when John suddenly pushed her against the car, shielding her body with his and drawing his gun. Before he could have directed it into the darkness where Felicity knew he must have seen or heard something, an arrow was already shot at his shoulder. Groaning, John sank to his knees, blinking several times before he passed out.

In the back of her mind, Felicity knew that the smartest thing to do was probably to run away. Her heart was racing in her chest, her body frozen in place. With wide eyes, she lowered her gaze to see the black arrow that was stuck in John’s shoulder. A small vial was attacked to it, telling Felicity he had been drugged.

Taking in a deep breath, Felicity lifted her head and looked into the darkness. She had to narrow her eyes to see the dark schemes of a person in the shadows. She clenched her hands to fists at her hips and stepped over John’s unconscious body closer to the darkness.

“Merlyn,” she said with surprisingly firm voice. “I know it’s you, so step out of there, you coward.”

Felicity would never understand how a man like Malcolm Merlyn had made it so far in his life. She had felt the slightest of compassion for him when she had learned what had happened to his wife. She knew what a trauma could do to people. She had talked to her mother about what his trauma had done to Oliver only a few hours ago. While it hadn’t kept Oliver from becoming the hero he was now, it had driven Merlyn to the darker side of his life.

When Merlyn stepped closer to her, right to the edge of the shadows, Felicity frowned slightly. He was wearing the same gear Malcolm had worn as the Dark Archer, the one she knew from the other League members too. There was something about him, the way he walked with his head ducked a little like he didn’t want her to see him and the way his hand was clenched around the bow that made her pause, though. Malcolm knew that she knew he was under that hood, so why would he try to hide his face from her. Even if she didn’t, with the scarf that covered the lower part of his face and only left his eyes free and the shadows he was still hidden it, it was hard to tell if it was Merlyn’s face anyway. Why trying to hide even more?

Her heart stuttered in her chest as she realized that whoever was under that hood, it wasn’t Malcolm. Felicity took a tiny step backwards, her feet bumping against John’s unconscious body. For a moment, she considered taking the gun he still held behind his fingers loosely. Before she got to do so, the masked villain took a step towards her, though. There were still several feet between them, but Felicity could almost hear the troubled breaths coming from him.

Felicity stayed where she was, just looking at the dark figure that stood there and watched her. Whoever he was, Felicity was sure Malcolm had gotten to know him in the League. He wasn’t a welcomed friend there, but Felicity didn’t doubt that he had managed to swipe one of Ra’s’ minions to use for his own aims. She knew if he attacked her, she had no chance. Yet, Felicity wasn’t sure if he really wanted to attack her or maybe just intimidate her. Malcolm hadn’t come for them physically either. She doubted he would change his plans so drastically and, even if he had, he’d act them out himself.

No, this seemed much more like a warning. Malcolm didn’t like if his plans were frustrated, especially not when it was about revenge. During the twenty-four hours that Felicity had needed to finally make up her mind and tell Oliver the truth, Malcolm had probably danced around the fire like Rumpelstiltskin while the king and the queen were still looking for his name. And just like Rumpelstiltskin when his name had been guessed, he had probably wanted to tear himself into two when he had learned that Oliver had turned himself in. This was probably a cheap try to threaten her and nothing to honestly fear. Thea would never forgive him. That was what Felicity had to count on.

“Who are you?” she asked with a voice that only trembled slightly.

“Don’t you know yet?” he asked back, his voice low and raspy almost like it came from the darkness itself.

“I know that you are working with Malcolm Merlyn,” she replied and watched the quiet figure in front of her. “So, who are you?”

The masked archer hesitated for a moment before he pulled away the scarf from his lower face and pulled down the hood. Felicity narrowed her eyes, trying to see who it was. It wasn’t until he stepped out of the shadows and into the light that Felicity could see his face. Her breathing faltered, her heart skipping a few beats.

“You?”

“Whoever you think I am, he is no longer,” he told her, the words sounding weirdly familiar. Hadn’t Maseo said something similar to Oliver when he had come here on Ra’s’ command years ago? “I am Al Ibn.”


	262. Tommy's return

Felicity’s heart was still racing in her chest, pounding against her ribcage with so much force, she was almost afraid it would break her bones and just jump out of her body. She could hear her blood rushing in her ear and it deafened her for everything else. She was unable to move, unable to say anything and unable to look away.

There were things that shouldn’t be possible. In the last decade – hell, that sounded like an awfully long time – she had learned a lot about what was possible and what wasn’t possible in this world. She had seen a machine creating an earthquake that was strong enough to take down an entire neighborhood. She had seen a serum turning people into strong soldiers with supernatural strength. She had seen a group of people living under the radar and building an army of assassins, fighting with swords and arrows like in historical movies. She had seen drugs changing the personality of a person, showing them their greatest fears and wildest dreams. She had seen a lot and, yet, the world managed to surprise her again and again by showing her that even impossible things were actually possible.

Felicity took in the person in front of her. Despite the thick leather gear he was wearing and the weapons that were attached to him, Felicity could still tell that he had gained muscles since she had seen him the last time. She recognized the shape and color of his grey eyes. Yet, the expression in them that also took over the rest of his face was something she had never seen on him. There was hatred there and at the same time an empty cold that told her he didn’t recognize her.

“Tommy,” Felicity whispered. “It’s me. Felicity.”

She knew it was stupid. She knew that Thea hadn’t been able to pull Roy from his Mirakuru-induced rage, just like Oliver hadn’t been able to tell that Vertigo turning into him as his biggest fear was just a drug-induced hallucination. He also hadn’t been able to easily tell that he had been caught in a drug-induced dream when he had lived in a world where he had never gone on the Gambit, his parents had still been alive and, yet, she and Oliver had been happily married apart from the problems of having babies. She doubted that she of all people could pull Tommy Merlyn out of whatever he was caught in.

“Tommy,” Felicity tried once more nonetheless. “It’s me. Felicity. I set up the wi-fi at Verdant. Do you remember Verdant? The club you and Oliver had to-“

Felicity didn’t know if it had been the mention of Oliver or something else, but suddenly Tommy started moving. He approached her with large and fast steps. Suddenly filled with fear, Felicity walked backwards, almost stumbling over John’s legs. She managed to keep her balance, though, and walked further back until she bumped against the car and couldn’t back away more.

Within a few brief seconds, Tommy had caught up to her. He was standing close to her now, impossibly close. His almost erratic breathing made his chest touch hers with every intake of his breath. Every outtake made his breath ghost over her face. Tommy’s body was shaking almost violently like he was fighting a higher power that was trying to control him.

“Tommy,” Felicity whispered, trying to reach him.

She didn’t get to say anything else, though. Tommy lifted his hand, putting it around her throat and tightening her fingers until she couldn’t breathe anymore. Felicity lifted her hands to his wrists, trying to fight him, but he was too strong. Desperation and fear spread inside of her as she looked in Tommy’s eyes that showed no recognition and no remorse. It was like he wasn’t even in there, like Tommy’s body existed without any soul in there.

Felicity knew she had no chance. Yet, she tried to fight Tommy. She reached out her hands to slap his face and get him to let go of her, but he didn’t. He didn’t even seem to mind that she was hitting him over and over again, her fingernails scratching his cheek and the side of his neck. His eyes stayed on her face stoically. His fingers just held her throat even more tightly, not only taking away her breath but also hurting her so badly that tears were welling in her eyes. It wasn’t long until her lungs started aching, burning like there was a fire building in her ribcage, with the need for breath and dizziness started to cloud her senses.

When her view blurred, Tommy’s face becoming indistinct and the colors mixing with a black veil as well as the colorful dots dancing in front of her eyes, a thousand questions popped into her mind. Was this it? Was this the moment it was all over? What would happen to Oliver? Where would the kids live? Would they live all with the same foster parents or were they torn apart? Were their friends going to take care of them?

As Felicity was still fighting Tommy’s hands around her throat, she wished she and Oliver had taken more care of things like these. When Emmy had been born, they had entered John and Lyla as guardian for Emmy. They had been the ones they had wanted to raise her if anything happened to them. Over the years, they had become lazy. They had stopped asking their friends and family if they were taking care of their kids if anything happened to them. William would still have his mother, but Emmy, Tommy, Millie and Addie wouldn’t have anyone. Lyla and John had two kids. Thea was pregnant. Laurel was in a committed relationship. Was any of them taking in four kids that weren’t their own?

Felicity felt her body giving out. Her legs started shaking until they couldn’t hold her weight any longer. The functions of her body were giving out, stopping to work to spare the little of energy she still had to keep her heart beating. The thought of her kids made a wave of adrenaline rush through her veins. She gathered all strength she still had to fight Tommy Merlyn. Her nail dug into his skin and scratched him, hurting him badly if the expression on his face was any indication. It wasn’t enough to make his fingers loosen, though.

Her view was blurring even more, the black rims spreading all over her sight until she couldn’t see anything anymore. Her heartbeat slowed down, her arms becoming heavy. A tear escaped her eye as she felt her consciousness fading away and realized this really was it. She sent a prayer to heaven that the team would manage to free Oliver, so he could return to their kids. As much as she loved their friends and family, it was Oliver she wanted to raise their children. Her death would sadden him beyond belief and he would need all the support he could get, but, with time, he’d get over it enough to be the dad their kids needed. He would-

When Tommy suddenly groaned in pain, turning away from her slightly, his hands loosened around her throat. Felicity sucked in a struggling breath. Instead of bringing any relief, it just made her throat ache even more. It felt like she wasn’t breathing in air, but a thousand of needles. She started coughing, her legs giving out after all, and, since Tommy wasn’t holding her any longer, she sank down to her knees. Her hands came up to her throat, holding it like her touch would ease the pain of being choked, but it only felt worse.

Felicity didn’t know how long she had been coughing, tears of shock, fear, relief and lack of oxygen streaming down her face, when a hand touched her shoulder. Felicity turned around quickly, trying to crawl back, but the car kept her from doing so. She was still almost blind, so she just slapped her hands through the empty air in front of her, hoping she’d eventually hit her attacker.

“Felicity, it’s me. It’s me. Calm down, it’s me,” a voice suddenly said, catching her wrists. “It’s me. John.”

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut several times until she was finally seeing more again. The black veil in front of her eyes ceased and the colorful dots disappeared. Her view was becoming clearer until she could see her friend’s face in front of her clearly.

“John,” she whispered.

The word came out as a hoarse whisper that hurt in her throat as much as the intake of breath had hurt. Felicity put her fingers back around her neck, hissing at the pain it caused. She swallowed, and it made the pain stretch from her neck to her ears and down to the top of her chest. Suppressing a sob, Felicity squeezed her eyes shut.

“Are you okay?” John asked.

Felicity nodded and even that hurt. She took in a deep breath, trying to breathe against the pain, but her throat hurt so badly that it only made it worse. Felicity bit down on her tongue and wiped away the wetness the tears had left on her cheeks.

“You?” she asked when she opened her eyes, trying to ignore the pain it caused.

“I am going to be in a minute,” John replied between clenched teeth.

“What-“

Felicity stopped her question of what exactly he meant when John already grabbed the end of the arrow that was stuck in his shoulder. With a mixture of fear and disgust, she watched him pulling it out of his shoulder. His left hand came to cover the wound on his right shoulder, but it couldn’t keep the blood from spilling.

“Take off your shirt,” Felicity asked her friend, ignoring the pain in her throat.

John frowned for a second, but he took it off and held it out to her. Quickly, Felicity ripped at the shirt until a stripe of just a couple inches of broad was ripped away from the shirt. She scrunched up what was left of the shirt and wrapped the small stripe around John’s shoulder, knotting it to keep the shirt in place. Without dressing material, this was the best she could do.

“We should go to the lair to patch this up,” Felicity whispered, unable to find her voice.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t get you to a hospital first?” John asked.

Felicity waved it away. “I’m fine.”

It was a blank lie. She was everything but fine. The shock was still deep in her bones, wavering on the surface where it could emerge at any time. John needed to get patched up, though, and they needed to find out what had happened to Tommy Merlyn after he had died and where he and his father were. There was no time to overindulge in desperation and fear. If the look on John’s face was any indication, he could look right through her, but Felicity ignored that.

“I’ll drive,” Felicity whispered and held out her hands for the keys. When John put them into her palm hesitatingly, Felicity formed her hand to a fist around them and nodded slowly. “Let’s go.”

She and John helped each other to get up from the floor. They were both standing on wobbly legs and took a moment to secure their stand before they turned to the car. Felicity wanted to open the door for John, but the moment she moved, she felt the dizziness coming back, a strong wave of nausea spreading through her. She lurched slightly and had to hold onto the roof of the car to not fall.

“Okay, I’ll drive,” John said.

“No, you’re hurt.”

“A hurt shoulder is half as bad as feeling dizzy when driving,” John replied. He held out his hand. “Give me the keys.”

Felicity hesitated, but eventually dropped the keys into the palm of his hand. She really shouldn’t be driving. She could use the drive to gather herself and try talking herself into believing that the pain in her throat was only half as bad as it really was.

 

 

“I still can’t believe it,” Thea whispered, stroking her hand up and down her baby belly absentmindedly while she was staring into the empty air like she was trying to imagine the scene John and Felicity had just told them about. “Tommy has been dead for more than ten years. How can any of this be real?”

Nobody answered to that. While Lyla continued to patch up the wound on her husband’s shoulder, Roy stroked his hands up and down Thea’s shoulder soothingly. Felicity was standing by the window, looking outside into the dark night.

After she and John had gotten in the car, she had grabbed her phone. She had wanted to send a text to the entire team and tell them to come to the basement of Verdant like she usually would in cases of these. Just before her thumb could have hit the button to send it, she had remembered that they had already cleared the lair. Even with Susan Williams’ promise that she had erased all evidence and wouldn’t publish it, even if she hadn’t, Felicity felt it was better, not to go back to the basement for now. Hence, they had met up at John’s and Lyla’s place.

Laurel was the only one who was missing. She had been called to a crime scene and wanted to use the opportunity to talk to Liam about how the investigations against Oliver were going. Felicity was actually relieved that she wasn’t here yet. It had been hard enough to tell Thea about this. She lost Tommy before she had even found out that he was her brother. If Laurel was here and learning that one more of her ex-boyfriends had come back from the dead after years, it would have probably been even more complicated.

Slowly, Felicity turned around. She sat down on the edge of the sill and took a sip of the tea she had brewed herself. Though swallowing was still hard and hurt, the tea seemed to soothe the aching a little nonetheless.

“Are you sure it was him?” Thea asked, her eyes only now meeting Felicity’s.

She nodded and whispered, “Without any doubt.”

“This just can’t be true.”

Again, Thea shook her head. Her gaze lowered from Felicity’s eyes to her neck where Felicity knew the bruises of being choked were visible now. She had seen them in the mirror when she had gone to the toilet before. Automatically, she lifted her fingers to touch them and regretted it immediately when it reminded her of how much the bruised skin actually hurt.

“Tommy would have never done something like this,” Thea stated. “I know he is Malcolm’s son, but I am his daughter and I am not doing stuff like that either. I just need to believe that our DNA doesn’t force us to do things like that.”

Felicity cocked her head and looked at her sister-in-law sympathetically. Her father might ever earn himself a price of father of the year, but Thea’s could easily get on a list of the world’s worst fathers. The things he had done to both of his children were often unmentionable.

“I don’t know how Malcolm brought him back,” Felicity whispered, her voice still missing after what had happened with Tommy, “but I doubt that Tommy really knows what he is doing. He looked… like he wasn’t in there.”

Thea kept staring at Felicity’s neck and only when Felicity lifted her fingers to cover the bruises, she closed her eyes and looked away eventually. She looked down at her hand that was still stroking her baby bump, probably tracing the movements of her baby. The thought that Malcolm had come back to probably get into touch with her had to be frightening, especially after what he had done to her the last time he had wanted to get back into touch.

“So, Malcolm is controlling him?” Roy asked with a frown. “How would that work?”

John hissed shortly when Lyla put the patch over the wound on his shoulder, finally finishing taking care of his bruise. He grabbed the shirt next to him and put it on before he replied, “Who knows. Malcolm certainly has his ways.”

“Think about what he has done to me,” Thea whispered. “I killed Sara.”

There was a moment of silence that nobody dared to speak. Thea had never really been able to get closure on what had happened with Sara. She had wanted Malcolm dead by the hands of the League which was why she had told Nyssa that he had been the one responsible for what had happened to Sara. When Oliver had freed Malcolm and he had escaped, she had been robbed of the closure she had needed so desperately. Felicity knew that having a baby, as much as Thea wanted it, also frightened her and filled her with even more guilt as she just couldn’t get rid of the feeling that she had robbed Sara of a chance of all of this. Quentin and Laurel had both talked to her and taken some of the guilt from her, but Felicity doubted that it was gone completely.

“Do you think Malcolm only revived him recently?” Thea asked for a moment.

Felicity shook her head. “I doubt it. Tommy looked like he had thorough training by the League of Assassins… or anyone else really. I think Oliver mentioned that the League has like a magic whirlpool that can heal wounds and probably also revive people.”

“But Malcolm and the League aren’t really friends,” Roy said.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Who knows. Malcolm came back after Oliver killed him, too.”

“So, Malcolm held him captive for years, trained him and prepared him to come back to Starling now?” Roy asked. “To help him getting back into contact with Thea and destroying Oliver at the same time?”

“At least that’s my guess,” Felicity replied and shrugged her shoulders. “But who knows what’s going on in Malcolm’s twisted mind.”

“What are we going to do now?” Thea asked, frowning. “We need to get Malcolm out of the way, but… I don’t want anything to happen to Tommy. Maybe, just maybe, there is a chance for us to bring him back, so I could really get to know him. As my brother I mean.”

Felicity looked at John, shrugging her shoulders. She wasn’t sure what to do because, as much as she wanted to believe that Tommy could be brought back from whatever he was caught in, she had also experienced firsthand how far gone he really was. If there was a chance to get back the man who had traveled to Hongkong years after his friend had died because someone had logged into his mail account and offered a glimpse of hope that maybe he hadn’t died, Felicity wanted to take it. She just wasn’t sure that chance actually existed.

“We have to find Malcolm and Tommy,” John replied. “And then we should trap them. Maybe we find a way to get Tommy back.”

“And what do we do with Malcolm?” Roy asked.

“I will take care of him,” Lyla replied. “If there is a way to keep him under control and locked away, it’s if he is with A.R.G.U.S.”

Felicity nodded. “Sounds reasonable.”

“Someone from the agency is already on the way to pick up the arrow,” Lyla explained. “Maybe we can find out where it is from or-“

“I can do that,” Felicity interrupted her.

“You have enough on your plate,” John replied, shaking his head. “You will need the rest.”

“Like I will be able to rest until Oliver is free and Malcolm behind bars,” Felicity mumbled to herself. The thought of lying in an empty bed that wasn’t theirs made her stomach twist. She hated sleeping without Oliver by her side. She didn’t even want to imagine how much worse it was for him.

“And what do we do if we don’t find a way to bring Tommy back?” Thea asked eventually. “The real Tommy?”

“Let’s not think about that yet,” John replied and shook his head. “We will take one step at a time and for now, we know that catching the two of them is the first and most important step.”

“Along with getting Oliver out of prison,” Lyla added. “Do you guys have a plan for that?”

“Can’t he just withdraw the confession?” Roy asked. “There is no evidence that he really is the Arrow.”

“I fear that would be too obvious,” John replied, shaking his head. “The police and FBI would shadow him for weeks to find a connection between him and the Arrow to figure out why he turned himself in and withdrew then.”

“Besides, he told them a lot of things that make the story really believable,” Felicity added, shrugging her shoulders. “We need a really good plan.”

“So, what exactly is our priority?” Thea asked. “Tommy and Malcolm or Oliver?”

Again, Felicity looked at John, but he just gestured back and forth between her and Thea. “Your decision.”

Felicity looked at Thea, who looked back at her. Her hand was now tightened around her shirt, her hand still close to her baby bump. Felicity knew how torn Thea had to be. She loved both of her brothers, but Oliver probably a little more given they had much more family history. At the same times, she was wondering what was best for the baby. While there wasn’t necessarily any danger for her or the baby’s life coming from Malcolm having him around too long didn’t seem really smart either. Who knew what his next step was.

“We should find Malcolm,” Felicity made the decision eventually. “That’s our priority.”

“What about Ollie?” Thea asked.

“He can take care of himself,” Felicity assured. “I am sure he’d decide the same way. First, we stop the fire from spreading further. Then we can blow it out and-“

When her phone vibrated, Felicity pulled it out of her purse. Her heart skipped a beat at seeing her mother’s name there. According to Thea, Donna had still been at the mansion when she had left. She had wanted to help Raisa with the kids a little. It was almost eleven by now. Felicity had wanted to be back with her kids for hours. The shocking news of Tommy’s return had distracted her, though.

“Did something happen?” Felicity asked.

“Are you okay?” her mother asked back after a short pause. “You sound hoarse.”

“I… It’s a long story,” Felicity replied. “Is everything alright at home?”

“The kids are asleep,” Donna told her, “but I just got into the car to pick William up from the station. He couldn’t reach you and-“

“I am coming home- to the mansion I mean- immediately,” Felicity interrupted her mom. “Thanks.”

“Okay. I am just going to drop William off at the mansion and head home then. I will be back tomorrow to spend more time with the kids.”

“Thank you, Mom.”

As soon as Felicity had hung up, Thea asked, “Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, nodding her head. “I just need to go home. William is coming.”

“Should I drive you?” John asked.

“No, I… Can I borrow your car?”

“Sure,” John replied. “And use the night to catch some sleep. We all should and-“

“Yes, I will. Sorry, but I really gotta go.”

Felicity was already on her way to the door, snatching the keys from John’s hand, when Lyla held her back by the door.

“Felicity?”

“Sorry, but-“

“It will just take a second,” Lyla told her. She grabbed a scarf from the coatrack and wrapped it around Felicity’s neck. “I think your kids have enough to process as it is. They don’t need to see their mommy hurt like that.”

Felicity nodded. “Thanks.”

“Not for that,” Lyla replied and hugged her friend. “Call me if you need anything.”

Felicity shot her a brief smile. “I will.”

She opened the door to find Laurel waiting on the other side, her hand already lifted for a knock.

“Hey, sorry, I am so late,” Laurel hurried to say. “You can visit Oliver the day after tomorrow again and-“

Felicity shot another short look to Lyla, who just nodded. “Go. I will tell her.”

“Tell me what?” Laurel asked, looking back between the two of them. “Did something happen?”

“Lyla will tell you,” Felicity replied. “I gotta go home. Sorry.”

Felicity pushed past her friend, hurrying towards the stairs. Yet, she heard Laurel repeat her question. “Tell me what?”

 

 

Felicity was walking up and down in front of the house nervously, tugging at the scarf to make sure it was still in place to hide the bruises. When her mother’s car stopped in front of the iron gate at the end of the drive way, Felicity pressed the button of the remote to open it. She waited with racing heart until the car stopped and William got out from the passenger side. While the car turned, and Felicity lifted her hand for a short wave to her mother, William just stood there in front of the house with his bag over his shoulder.

Even from this fleeting moment, Felicity could tell that this wasn’t going to be easy. Despite the darkness, she could see that William was angry. Unfortunately, he had every right to be.

Once the gates at the end of the driveway were closed against, Felicity nodded towards the house. William hesitated for a moment, crossing his arms in front of his chest, before he approached her.

“I didn’t think you’d come here so late,” Felicity whispered, trying to make the hoarseness of her voice sound somewhat casual. “I am not even sure you should travel this late given what can happen.”

“Well, and I guess you know the best what can happen,” he replied angrily.

Felicity bit down on the inside of her cheek. William had the right to be angry and he had the right to take it out on her.

“What did your mother say when you told her you wanted to come here?”

“She didn’t want me to go,” William replied.

“So, you left without her knowledge?”

“No, I told her I would go no matter what and she let me.”

At least one thing she didn’t have to worry about Felicity thought to herself. She had enough on her plate as it was. Getting into a fight with Samantha was not something she needed. She feared it would happen sooner or later, especially when they didn’t find a way to free Oliver from all suspicions, but she would have to hope that it wouldn’t happen.

“Do you want something to eat or to drink?” Felicity asked while she was leading William through the foyer.

“No. I just want the truth.”

Felicity nodded. “Sure.”

She led him to the living room and gestured for him to sit down. William didn’t seem to be happy about her suggestion. He dropped his bag to the floor carelessly and let himself fall into the cushions, though. His arms stayed crossed in front of his chest, his angry eyes fixated on hers, though. Felicity pressed her lips together and sat down on the edge of the couch table in front of him.

Felicity knew there was another long night ahead of her. William would want to know anything she had to tell. It would be hard enough as it was, but with the aching of her throat, it was almost like torture. Her throat hurt so badly that tears threatened to well in her eyes with every sound that came from her lips.

While she was waiting for a sign of William that he was ready, he looked her up and down. His gaze lowered from her face to the scarf around her neck, then lifted again to her eyes. He was frowning slightly since it was way too warm for a scarf.

“Do you have a cold?” William asked.

“I am just-“

“You promised not to lie to me,” William interrupted her.

Felicity pulled her lips into her mouth and lowered her gaze. She was so used to telling these little lies whenever she was confronted with questions that threatened her secret nighttime job that she didn’t even think about them anymore. She just told them, especially when it came to uncomfortable things her kids shouldn’t know.

“You are right,” Felicity whispered, looking into William’s eyes. “I am sorry.”

William looked at her for a moment before he released a short breath and relaxed a little. He nodded, leaning back into the cushions a little more. He shrugged his shoulders and asked, “So, what happened?”

Slowly, Felicity pulled at the scarf and dropped it to the floor. She gave William a moment, watching his eyes fill with worry at the red bruises there. She couldn’t say that she was feeling exactly comfortable about showing William the bruises. Parents always wanted to shield their kids from thing like that, even when the kids were teenagers that wanted to know the whole truth.

“I was attacked,” she admitted honestly.

“Was that dad?”

“Oh my God, no,” Felicity replied, shaking her head firmly. “Your dad would never do something like that to me or to anyone really.”

William hesitated. “But he did kill people, right?”

Felicity swallowed. It wasn’t like there was a way to ease into a conversation like this, but starting with one of the most problematic things didn’t really help here. How did you explain this to a teenager?

“After your dad came back from his five years away, he was traumatized,” Felicity said slowly. “He had seen terrible things, including his father killing himself in front of his eyes, so that Oliver would survive and right his wrongs. Almost everything Oliver learned during that time was violence. He learned not to trust anyone but himself and that only brutal measures were getting him what he wanted and needed. Killing seemed like the only way for him back then. He was never a guy to brag about it. He… he pushed people away because he didn’t want to infect them with his darkness. He hated himself. He did kill, but he didn’t like it.”

“You are not even denying it.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Like you said, I promised not to lie.”

William looked at her for another long moment like he was considering his next question. Felicity waited, knowing there was a lot for William to take in from the few truths she had told him and there was still so much more to come.

“Why did he stop killing? He did stop killing, right?”

Felicity nodded. “He did. Do you remember Tommy Merlyn?”

William nodded. “Dad’s best friend. He died during the Undertaking.”

“Exac-“ Felicity stopped. “Truth be told, it seems like he isn’t dead. For the moment, that doesn’t matter, though, and I can’t tell you more about it. When Tommy learned that Oliver was the Hood, he said he was a murderer. Oliver felt like killing, after Tommy’s death, was dishonoring his memory. He didn’t want to be a vigilante any longer, but I asked him to find another way.”

“Why?” William asked. “Why did you want him to find another way? Why didn’t you just let him stop? This whole thing is crazy and how he is in jail.”

“Because I saw the good he could do,” Felicity replied, feeling a stitch of guilt at the thought that she was the one whose action forced Oliver to go through this. “I worked with him and it wasn’t easy. We disagreed on a lot of things. My first day on the team with him and John, I actually quit and said it had been a mistake signing on with him even provisionally. Oliver was… he was still suffering from everything that had happened on the island and there was nobody that could really reach through to him. Yet, I could see that he had a good heart. He was sacrificing himself to help this city. For me, that always made him a hero.”

“Even though you didn’t agree with his methods?”

“Even though I didn’t agree with his methods,” Felicity confirmed. She shrugged her shoulders. “It took a long time for Oliver to open up the way he does now. Letting people in on his mission and actually taking care of acute problems here… it was a long way.”

William nodded. He looked at his hands in his lap for a moment, probably thinking about everything she had told him so far. Just like with Donna, she didn’t want to go into all the details. It was Oliver’s story and his choice how much he wanted to share.

“Why didn’t you stop when you were starting a family?” William asked eventually. He lifted his gaze, locking eyes with her. “I mean… you had to know that, if this ever came out, this would be catastrophic for your kids.”

Felicity looked at William, seeing the honest confusion in his eyes. Given the situation they were in now – William angry, Emmy and Tommy sad and scared, Millie in panic after what had happened with the reporter – it was a valid question he asked. Felicity lowered her eyes.

“That’s on me,” she admitted in an intentional whisper. “Oliver always wanted to stop. I was the one who didn’t want to.”

“Why?” William asked. “How could you want this for your children?”

Felicity sighed and lifted her eyes to William once more as she said, “I didn’t think something like this would ever happen. There were times that the Arrow was seen as a hero as it should be. Now… I don’t know… Honestly, I don’t know why I thought it was a clever idea to keep doing this. Maybe I hoped that the city would see Oliver through my eyes, as the hero he is. Really, if you want to be mad at someone, be mad at me. Oliver wanted to put down the hood for you kids. I was the one against it.”

William looked at her closely like he was trying to figure out if she was lying to protect Oliver. The truth was that she wasn’t. She had been the one who had asked Oliver or maybe forced him not to lay down that work. Years later, she had given him every out. If he wanted to stop now, she wouldn’t have stopped him. Oliver knew that. _What wifey says hubby does_ , as he had once put it, did no longer apply. It was Oliver’s choice if he wanted to do this or not.

“You still think dad is a good person?” William asked.

“Yes,” Felicity replied without hesitation, “because all your dad is trying to do is to save this city. He has been through a lot and he has learned a lot. Your dad loves you and your siblings more than anything and everything he did, he did to allow his family and the people in the city to have a good life. I know I am asking a lot of you, but please give him another chance. Let him explain all this to you and then decide if you still want him as your dad or if he has lost your trust and your respect.”

For a long time, William didn’t say anything. Felicity waited with held breath for an answer. She knew it was a lot to ask of him and it wasn’t even fair that she was the one asking. William had to feel terribly betrayed and she’d understand if he just turned around and slammed the door behind him. She’d probably do the same if she was him.

To Felicity’s surprise, William didn’t need much time to think about it. He nodded slowly and whispered, “Okay.”

“Okay?” Felicity asked nonetheless.

William nodded. “Okay.”

Felicity felt relief spreading inside her chest. She closed her eyes, releasing a long breath. She had been so scared about this conversation. She had feared that she was going to say the wrong thing. William wasn’t her biological son, but he was just as important to her as her other children. Losing him would have been unbearable.

When she opened her eyes again, she felt a single tear rolling down her cheek and quickly wiped it away. It was too late for William to miss, but he didn’t say anything about it. She smiled at how he was keeping his eyes down to avoid her eyes. He looked so much like Oliver in this moment and it warmed Felicity’s heart.

“One last question, though,” William said eventually.

“Shoot,” Felicity replied.

“Who’s under the other masks?”

“John is Spartan,” Felicity started. “Roy is Arsenal and Thea Speedy. Laurel is Black Canary.”

“And in Central City?”

Felicity smiled. She knew how much of a fan of the Flash William had been when he and Oliver had first met. Since William had grown up in Central City, he had been much closer to their metahuman.

“Barry Allen.”

William ducked his head. “Honestly?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Yep.”

“I wouldn’t have thought that.”

“Few people would I guess,” Felicity replied with a smile. “Barry is different from our vigilantes.”

“Yes, he is,” William replied.

Felicity watched him for a moment. She smiled about the way he looked like he was still processing this last piece of information. For so long he had adored the Flash and so many years, he had been right in his reach.

“How do you want to get dad out of jail?” William asked after a moment. “You want to get him out there, right? Why did he even turn himself in?”

“We were blackmailed, and Oliver felt turning himself in was the best way to keep the upper hand and control what was happening. I don’t feel it’s working, but that’s something else,” Felicity said. She sighed. “The team is working on a few leads to find the one who is responsible for this mess, but it’s very complicated and we haven’t come far yet. Only then we can work more thoroughly on getting dad back.”

“Is he going to be okay?” William asked. “I know he has nightmares sometimes and he always said he’s feeling the safest around you.”

Felicity smiled sadly. “Oliver know what he’s doing. He probably isn’t feeling good, but he’s certainly getting along. Your dad is tough.”

William nodded slowly. “Were you ever going to tell me?”

“We talked about it a lot,” Felicity replied. “We just weren’t sure if it was a good idea. Emmy and Tommy just learned about it sooner or later, rather involuntarily in Emmy’s case. In your case, it’s even more difficult because we don’t want to put you in a situation where you have to decide between lying to your mother and risking not to be allowed to come here anymore.”

“Can’t we just tell my mom the same story we will tell the rest to get dad free?”

“I am not sure,” Felicity admitted honestly. “I don’t think we should lie to her.”

“She is never going to accept it,” Williams whispered, shaking his head. “She wasn’t a fan of the Flash, and she will certainly hate this. The least I want is a chance to talk to dad and make up my own mind. Please.”

Felicity nodded. “Okay. You will stay here as long as your mom allows it and talk to Oliver. After that, we can decide what to tell your mom.”

“Thanks,” William replied.

Felicity smiled and watched him for a moment before she got up from the couch table and, though she didn’t say a word, William did the same after a moment. Smiling, Felicity wrapped her arms around her stepson’s shoulders and pulled him into a hug. William didn’t back away. He went into the hug willingly, hugging Felicity back.

“Thank you for giving Oliver another chance,” Felicity whispered. “It means the world to me and it means the world to him.”

William chuckled and tightened his arms around her for a moment. “Dad is lucky he has a great spokeswoman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No cliffhanger - for once.


	263. The team's mission

“There are like a dozen reporters gathered in front of the building.”

When Felicity shot a brief look at William, who was sitting on the rear bench seat next to her, she found him looking out of the window. She followed the direction of his gaze to the front of the building where Oliver’s campaign office was located. Felicity doubted they would stop lurching all the places they hoped to catch someone to talk to. There were still reporters in front of their house and now in front of the driveway to the mansion, Oliver’s campaign office and Queen Inc. too.

“Don’t worry,” Felicity said, turning back to her tablet. “We take the back entrance.”

From the corner of her eye, Felicity could see him nodding slightly. She knew she shouldn’t have taken him with her. She hadn’t even wanted to take him with her. She had had her keys in her hand, about to leave the house, when William had come downstairs with his shoes in his hands and just declared that he would come with her. Felicity had tried to tell him that it was better if he stayed at the mansion, but he hadn’t wanted to listen, and she hadn’t had the energy to argue about it with him.

She hadn’t slept the night before, again. She had lain in bed in the same room Oliver had slept in as a teenager. She had felt terribly tired and yet wide awake. She had been restless, her legs urging to be moved despite the exhaustion that had taken hold of her. Felicity didn’t remember how many hours she had just lain there and stroked her hand over the empty side of the bed where Oliver should have slept. At four a.m., she hadn’t been able to stay in bed any longer. She had gone downstairs and checked if her search for Malcolm and Tommy had already brought anything. When it hadn’t, she had extended the search, feeling it was the only thing she could have done.

“Do we have any idea where we will operate from now on?” Laurel asked. “As long as Oliver is still in Iron Heights, we shouldn’t risk going anywhere near there.”

“Where did you operate from until now?” William asked.

Laurel shot a look back over her shoulder at him like she only remembered now that he was there too. She looked at Felicity apologetically.

“In the basement of Verdant,” Felicity replied. “It used to be a factory of Queen Incorporated. Oliver built the club there because it felt like a good base of operation, but he needed a cover to go into the Glades daily and just spent a lot of time there. I already have an idea where we could shift it to. It’s why we are going to the campaign office.”

“I thought you just wanted to talk to that Alex-guy,” Roy replied.

Felicity suppressed a grin at the sour tone of Roy’s voice. She knew that Thea got along with Oliver’s political strategist very well and, given that they were working together a lot for the campaign, they spent a lot of time together. Roy wasn’t exactly happy about it, probably because Alex was nice and looking kind of good.

“I will talk to him and suggest closing the campaign office for a while,” Felicity replied. “That will give us the room to work on a few things there. I already sent Cisco the plans and a few of my ideas. With everything going on here, I figured I should shift the planning to Central City for now. John is making sure we get a minimum of things we need to make it work for the next few days. We should make sure to get the entire thing built up around Christmastime. Oliver already gave everyone off the days from December 23rd to the January 6th. That has to be enough time.”

“But you can’t just-“

“I will explain everything later,” Felicity promised William, reaching out a hand to touch his shoulder shortly, when the car came to stop. “For now, we will go in there. I will talk to Alex and make sure the entire building will be cleared. Okay?”

William nodded. “Okay.”

“Thanks,” Felicity replied.

She knew it wasn’t easy. After their talk late yesterday, he had asked some more questions this morning, but there had to be at least a thousand more questions he hadn’t got to ask yet. It had to be unbelievably hard for him. Apart from his dad being in jail, he also wanted to know who exactly his dad was and what he was doing or how he was doing it. It was a lot.

Felicity grabbed her keys before she left the car and led William to the side entrance quickly, Roy and Laurel following them. While she was walking through the hallway, Felicity tugged at her scarf a little, making sure it was right in place to cover her bruises. Her throat still ached terribly, talking and swallowing hurting so much that Felicity tried to avoid it. She had even relinquished her coffee this morning.

“Wait in Oliver’s office,” Felicity suggested to the other, nodding towards Oliver’s office that was now empty.

“Are you sure you won’t need help to talk to that guy?” Roy asked.

Felicity nodded. “Thea and I got it handled.”

Roy didn’t seem satisfied with her answer, but he nodded nonetheless. Felicity waited until the three of them had disappeared into the office before she hurried over to where Alex and Thea, who had come here earlier today after Alex had called her already.

“Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t come here sooner,” Felicity said quickly. “I know it seems like everything is on fire and-“

“Well, I’d say the campaign is on fire indeed,” Alex interrupted her. “Thea told me that Oliver had good reasons to do this even if she refuses to tell me what are good enough reasons for a dad and a political candidate to commit to a crime he hasn’t done.”

Felicity and Thea exchanged a brief look. Of course, there was no good reason for that. On the other hand, there was no way they could tell the truth. Stupid excuses like Oliver and the rest of the team had always had to tell outsiders would have to be continued to be told until they had come up with something reasonable.

“Alex and I already talked about what we should do now,” Thea said after a moment and cleared her throat. “We agree that it’s best to close the office until Oliver is freed of all suspicions.”

“The reporters are asking for statements. The telephones are ringing the entire time,” Alex explained, shaking his head. “We barely have enough people to take all the calls. At the same time, we can’t tell them anything. Staying here is not doing anything good for Oliver’s campaign. It might even make things work.”

Felicity nodded, feeling relieved Alex wasn’t trying to convince her to step in front of the cameras or anything. She didn’t know if it was the good groundwork Thea had put into this or if Alex really didn’t think there was anything they could do. It didn’t matter, though. As long as things were going like Felicity was planning, she wouldn’t ask for the reasons.

“Okay, then I’d say you tell everyone to just take a few paid days off,” Felicity replied, “and Oliver is getting back in touch when this is all solved.”

Felicity had no idea if he still wanted to run for mayor when he got out of jail, but she wanted to keep him this way open. He had just opened up himself to the idea of protecting the city in more ways than the Arrow was able to. If he was losing that secret alter-ego now, maybe he wanted to explore this other way instead nonetheless. Felicity would do whatever she could for their life not to fall apart completely.

“Okay, I’ll take care of it. Tell Oliver… Tell him he’s an idiot, but I will try my best to back him up.”

Alex sighed before he turned around and walked away to gather everyone in front of Oliver’s office. Felicity and Thea stayed back, watching with their arms in front of their chests as he told the rest of the staff about their decision.

“Did Alex say anything about Oliver’s chances in case he is freed of all the suspicions?” Felicity asked, leaning her head closer to Thea. “With that other guy entering the race-“

“It’s not going to be easy,” Thea interrupted her, “but we will figure this out later.”

Felicity nodded. “It’s not our priority anyway. I’d just hate to see all the work Oliver put into this ruined.”

“Yeah,” Thea agreed and sighed. “Ollie would be a great mayor and now it might all be ruined because of Malcolm. He ruined enough as it is.”

Felicity put a hand to her sister-in-law’s back. “We will find him. I promise.”

“I just wished he was dead already.”

“I can’t promise that,” Felicity replied, “though he really shouldn’t be brought anywhere near to me or I might change my mind.”

 

 

About an hour later, Felicity locked the door behind Alex. She took in a deep breath, trying to get all the glances and whispers she had caught on out of her head. Even the people working for Oliver weren’t sure what to think about his admission.

“So, what’s the plan now?” Laurel asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Are we just going to lead this entire thing from the offices?”

“No,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “I have different plans.”

“What about John?” Roy asked. “Shouldn’t we wait for him?”

“He should already be at our new provisional hideout.”

Without saying another word, she went to the corner of the room and pressed the small button on the underside of the edge. The wooden panels in front of her slid apart and revealed an old elevator behind it.

“What is this?” Thea asked. “I had no idea there was a room.”

“It used to be Sebastian Blood’s hideout,” Felicity replied. “I actually forgot about it until recently because I saw no reason to change the location of our basis of operations. Now seems to be the right time to use this, though.”

When the doors downstairs opened, they saw John standing in the small area that was lightened. The rest of the spacious basement was still completely dark. Felicity had had no time to check what condition the hideout was in. It was part of why she had asked John to come right downstairs, the other being that she had needed him to find out if the secret exit was usable. Given he was down here, it seemed to work.

“How bad is it?” he asked.

“Given how sparingly furnished the foundry was before you joint us down there, I’d say we can deal with it,” John replied. “There seems to be some glitch with the electricity, though.”

Felicity nodded quickly and kneeled down on the concrete floor to put her tablet computer that she had held under her arm the entire time they had been upstairs in front of her. She pulled the keyboard out of her purse and used the cables John had bought to get access to the internet to get into the system and find out what was wrong.

“Do you think it’s a good idea to do this from here?” Roy asked her, looking around doubtingly. “This place doesn’t look like it’s even healthy to stand here, never mind using it as a base of operation. What if the internet fails and we get trapped somewhere.”

Felicity didn’t reply, but she didn’t have to since John explained, “You are insulting her, Roy.”

“What are you going to do now?” William, who had stayed a little behind as he had looked around the empty basement, asked. “Felicity said you want to find out who is responsible for the blackmail.”

“Yes, and Felicity is already running a search on that,” John replied.

“How?”

“She hacked into the FBI and stole their facial recognition software a few years ago. Then she hacked herself into the traffic surveillance and every other surveillance cameras to find the faces we are looking for,” Thea explained. “It’s how we usually find our criminals.”

“For the record, I didn’t steal the software,” Felicity said, not looking up. “I just borrowed a self-made copy of it and improved the software a little. In case they ever lose it, I will be there to offer them the improved software.”

Thea chuckled. “If you say so.”

“I do say so,” she replied.

“But who exactly are you looking for?” William asked. “Who did blackmail dad into doing this?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, continuing to work on the getting the power to the basement switched on. She wished all her kids were still little babies that she didn’t have to tell anything about the terrible things people were able to do. Addie and Millie were too young to understand any of this. Tommy just needed a lot of love and affection to know that his world wasn’t falling apart and the people who loved him most weren’t leaving him. Emmy was asking a lot of questions already, but she knew that if her mommy told her that she couldn’t tell her anything yet, it was the truth. It was so much more difficult with William. He was old enough to cognitively understand this. It didn’t mean that he should necessarily know all of this.

“The same man who is responsible for the Gambit going down all those years ago,” Felicity replied eventually

When Felicity managed to get the access she needed and switched on the power, all lights turned on. Only now they could see how spacious the room really was. Felicity had seen the floor plans and studied them thoroughly when she hadn’t been able to sleep early this morning and worked on possible plans to set it up for their needs in the future. Yet, she hadn’t known how much room they really had here until now. Otherwise, she might have suggested moving weeks ago. This place really could be useful with how much the team and all of their families had expanded. It had been quite confined at times.

“So-“

Felicity shot William a brief look, wordlessly asking him not to ask any more questions. Now was just not the time for any of this. The team would have to set up everything they needed for things to work from here. Knowing who was behind this actually meant they had some vigilante-work to do. William nodded slightly, telling her that he understood that now just wasn’t the time.

“Okay, we should set up a few tables and a chair for me to work on,” Felicity suggested. “Everything else has to wait until we have more time.”

“I have everything in the van,” John replied.

He gestured to where he had stopped the car near the back entrance that Felicity planned to use as a parking area when they’d renovate everything here. After the photos the Dragon Lady had showed her, she was convinced that they should hide the van and the motorcycles. They had pulled through with the van parking in the small blind end behind Verdant, but they shouldn’t challenge their luck any further.

“Okay, let’s work on this,” Roy suggested.

He was already heading to the car, everyone following him, when Felicity’s computer beeped. She frowned and took a look back over her shoulder, expecting to just find a warning message that the system was overloaded or anything like that. Instead, a window of the facial recognition software had opened. The photos of Malcolm’s and Tommy’s face she had used for the search were shown on the monitor, the crucial points of their faces that the software worked with, blinking.

“Do you have something?” Laurel asked when Felicity hurried back to her computer.

Felicity quickly typed a few commands, checking where the faced had been recognized. She released a breath she didn’t know she had been holding, almost chuckling.

“I didn’t think they’d left themselves get caught,” Roy said.

“Neither did I,” Felicity replied. “It was a coincidence, though. A police car was in the Warehouse District. The dashcam caught them and thanks to the Bluetooth I have access to it.”

“Can you locate where they are?” Laurel asked.

“They are in civil clothes,” Felicity replied absentmindedly, looking at the footage, “so I’d say that they are probably operating from there. I can’t narrow down the location, though.”

“Doesn’t matter,” John replied. “We are going to there and check if we can find him.”

Felicity nodded and turned her head over her shoulder to Thea. “Can you take William home?”

“Can’t I-“

“No,” Felicity replied firmly, quickly turning towards him completely. While the others left to get their suits from the van, Felicity approached William and put her hands to his shoulders, looking at him urgently. “You can’t stay here. Maybe one day you can stay here while there is a mission to see how this works. I am sure it will help you to see that it’s not as dangerous as it might sound. This is not the right time for that, though. I need my full focus on this more than I usually do in missions. That is why I need you home.”

William just looked at her for a moment before he took in a deep breath and nodded. “Okay.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered. “Thea is going to take care that you are getting to the mansion safely.”

Again, he nodded. Lowering his gaze, he turned to Thea and nodded to the elevator. “Let’s go.”

Felicity only looked after them shortly before she hurried to her tablet and worked on getting closer footage of the Warehouse District from one of the satellites. Working on this from her tablet certainly wasn’t ideal, but she had no other choice. She would have to make it work for today. As soon as they had caught the Merlyns, she could set up her entire system.

“Sometimes it’s still weird we are going out there in bright daylight,” Felicity heard Roy say. “Are we sure this is a good idea with Oliver in jail?”

“We have no choice,” John replied. “If we don’t make our move now, we might lose them again.”

Felicity felt her stomach cramp at the thought slightly. They needed to find Malcolm Merlyn and made sure he’d never come back to haunt them anymore. They should have taken care of that years ago, but they had always had other priorities. Now was their chance and they’d have to make good use of it. If Malcolm escaped, he’d probably return with another big bang in a few years like he always did and it always seemed to get worse. At the same time, she didn’t want her teammates to get hurt. She knew John was right though. They had no choice.

 

 

“Still nothing?” Felicity asked after another ten minutes had passed.

“Nope,” Laurel was the first to reply. “The southside is quiet except for a few workers.”

“Same at the northside,” Roy added. “There is nothing even remotely suspicious.”

“Spartan?” Felicity asked, barely any hope left in her voice.

“You’ll be the first to know if I see them.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue, biting back a snippy comment. She knew she had asked if there was anything new every ten minutes in the eighty minutes. She actually wished that she would have gone into the field with them. She wasn’t doing that often, but sometimes she felt she had to. Today was one of those moments, especially because she knew that she was driving everyone else insane with her questions.

It had been ninety minutes since they had left the foundry, and nothing had happened yet, Well, nothing but the sun starting to go down. Felicity did consider telling them to come back since it seemed pointless to wait for the Merlyns to show up. At the same time, she knew that they had no other lead and no other hint where they might be. They might not ever find them again if-

“Arsenal, Black Canary,” John suddenly whispered, “come to the central area.”

“Are they there?” Felicity asked, feeling her heart beating up into her chest.

“Yes,” John replied, “and if their clothes are any indication, they are getting ready to head out.”

Felicity pinged John’s exact location and told it to Laurel and Roy, so they would find him sooner. At the same time, she was already calling up a thorough map of the district and plan of the building to check how they could enter the warehouse without risking to have Malcolm and Tommy escape.

“Okay, there are two entrances,” Felicity explained. “One on the southside and one on the westside. Black Canary, take the entrance on the south. Arsenal, go to the west. Spartan, I suggest you take the glass roof as it seems like an invitation.”

“Alright, you heard the boss,” John said.

With held breath Felicity listened to the silence over the comms as everyone was getting into place. She closed her eyes, whispering a Hebrew prayer to herself for her friends to make it out of there without any major injuries. Malcolm Merlyn was as dangerous as a criminal could be and it wouldn’t be easy to defeat him, even with three people fighting him.

It was the Canary Cry that gave the go for everyone to enter the building. Felicity turned down the volume of her line on the comms, so the noises of the fight were only like a whisper in her ear. She squeezed her eyes shut, continuing to say her prayer. She wasn’t this nervous often, but, when they had to face a really tough opponent, sometimes it freaked her out to know she was completely blind. Without her usual tech, she actually felt like there was nothing she could do to help, but pray for their friends to make it home safe.

Her heart clenched painfully in her chest at the thought that one of them might not make it home safe.

“Tommy is down,” Roy announced. “Hit with a soporific.”

“What about Merlyn?”

She didn’t get an answer. Instead, she heard Roy groaning as he was probably getting back into the action too. If they had managed to take Tommy out despite all of his craziness, Felicity had a slight hope that maybe they’d manage to take Malcolm out too. She just had to hope that they would.

Malcolm Merlyn had been fighting this family for more time than it should be possible. He had been the one who had blackmailed Robert into joining the Undertaking and who had then killed him and almost killed Oliver to keep his plan hidden. He had blackmailed Moira into joining in on his project for her husband. He had taken half a thousand lives because he had wanted to destroy a neighborhood. He had come back and forced Thea, his own daughter, into killing a friend, just to set up the League against Oliver which had almost gotten him killed. Again.

There was a loud bang that pulled Felicity from her thoughts. She flinched at the sound, helplessly turning to her computer before she remembered that she didn’t have her usual system at hand.

“Guys?” she asked. “Can someone hear me?”

There was a long silence at the other end of the line, a way too long silence. Felicity’s heart stopped. She shouldn’t have led them into this team, especially not with more people. With Oliver and Thea missing, they were two fighters less than they’d usually sent into a mission like that. It had made her stomach twist painfully when they had headed out, but it hadn’t been worse enough to make her reconsider sending them out there. She should have asked their friends in Central City for help and ask them to call Supergirl in too or called Bruce and asked him to come. He had offered several times in the last hours since Oliver had turned himself in to help in whatever way she needed him.

“Does anyone hear me?” Felicity asked once more.

Again, she didn’t get an answer. Felicity felt her heart sink even more. If anything had happened to them, three kids would lose their dads. Thea’s baby would have never met his dad. Connor would be too young to remember his and Sara would be in pain over losing hers. Quentin would lose his other daughter like he had already lost Sara twice. The worst was that catching Malcolm probably wouldn’t have been worth it.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip for a moment, unsure of what to do. She checked that the lines really were alright and tried talking to them once more. When, again, nobody answered, Felicity typed a few commands that caused an acoustic feedback and, hence, a lout and jarring creak. Felicity released a relieved breath when that finally got her an answer in form of pained groans of her teammates.

“Is everyone alright?” she asked, still worried. “Is anyone hurt? Do you need an ambulance or-“

“I’m fine,” Laurel was the first to answer. “Everything hurts, but I am alright.”

“Malcolm caused a small explosion,” John replied with another groan. “We might have flown through the air for a couple of feet, but we are alright.”

“Arsenal?”

“Yeah, what John said.”

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment, now releasing a longer breath of relief. Her teammates were okay. They’d all make it home safe at the end of the day. That was all that mattered. Everything else was just a bonus. When her computer beeped, announcing that shots as well as an explosion had been reported to the police, she cleared her throat, gathering her thoughts. She knew they needed to disappear from there quickly. Unlike with the Glades, the police didn’t take too much time when crime was reported in the Warehouse District.

“What about the Merlyns?”

“Tommy is out,” Roy replied.

“Malcolm got away,” Laurel added.

Felicity nodded. “Doesn’t matter. Sooner or later, we will get him. All that matters is that you are all okay.”

“We are,” John confirmed once more.

“Good,” Felicity replied. “You should get away from there as soon as possible. The police was already called.

“Alright,” John replied. “Get everything ready for when we return. We don’t have a med table or anything, but there should be some blankets in one of the bags and we need an infusion to keep him sedated.”

“I’ll take care of it. I am turning off the comms.”

As soon as Felicity had opted out, she hurried over to the garage area where John had just dropped everything he had taken from the foundry to A.R.G.U.S. and from there to here to just drop off when they had headed out. She had to open several bags and boxes before she found the ones with the blankets and the med supply.

Until the rest of the team with an unconscious Tommy Merlyn came back, Felicity had set up everything they needed. She had put down several blankets to use as a mattress and prepared everything for Tommy’s infusion to keep him sedated as long as they hadn’t found a way to get him out of whatever craziness he was caught in.

Felicity watched with some distance how John carried Tommy over his shoulder to the blankets and lay him down there. He took off the thick leather jacket of the League and freed him of all weapons he carried before he put the IV.

“It’s so weird to see him again,” Laurel whispered. “After all this time.”

Felicity nodded and put her hand to her friend’s back, rubbing up and down comfortingly. “I know. This world is just crazy.”

“Now we just need to find out how to get him back to normal,” Roy explained. “There is definitely some craziness going on there.”

“I will try to get back in touch with Nyssa,” Laurel said.

Felicity frowned. “You still have contact?”

“Sometimes,” Laurel replied. “Rarely to be honest. Maybe I manage to reach her, though. If someone has an idea what to do with him, it’s probably her.”

Felicity nodded. Malcolm had been trained by the League. Felicity didn’t doubt that he knew how they were fighting and maintaining their power. She was almost sure that he had found a way to use the magic bubble bath they had to bring his son back for his own needs. If that was the case, Nyssa was probably the only one who could tell what was going on.

“What do we do about Malcolm?” Roy asked.

“I will continue to search for him,” Felicity replied. “I honestly doubt that he will stay in Starling, though. We managed to cross his plans about Oliver and I splitting up. We also managed to steal Tommy from him. He got nothing now and I am ninety percent sure that he wouldn’t want Thea to get in any danger.”

“Ninety percent doesn’t seem like much to me,” Roy whispered.

Felicity shot him a brief look, whispering, “I know.”

“So, what will we do now?” Laurel asked.

“We should focus on healing Tommy and getting Oliver out of jail,” John replied. “Felicity is right. Malcolm is probably not going to stay here. We are lucky if we catch him, but we probably won’t. Let’s focus on getting Oliver out of jail before the whole situation escalates.”

“Sounds reasonable,” Laurel whispered, “but-“

When Felicity’s phone beeped, she quickly grabbed it and frowned at the text she had received.

“Bad news?” John asked.

“I think I need to go home,” Felicity replied. “My mom says the kids have trouble falling asleep. With Oliver away and-“

“Go,” John interrupted her immediately. “They need you.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, looking at where Tommy was lying unconscious on the blankets. His breathing was even, no sign that the sedation shouldn’t work.

“Someone should stay with him.”

“I will do that,” Laurel replied immediately.

“Are you sure?” Felicity asked.

Laurel nodded. “You should all go home to your families. I can stay here.”

Felicity hugged her friend briefly. She knew Laurel had struggled with Tommy’s death after everything that had happened between her, Tommy and Oliver. She also knew Laurel had just allowed herself to push past it and gave love another try with Liam. That Tommy came back now wasn’t easy.

“Call me if anything is going on,” she asked her.

“That’s nice,” Laurel replied, “but you are the last person I’d call. Your kids need you now more than ever.”

“I know,” Felicity replied. She loosened herself from the hug and smiled at her friend sadly for a moment. “I am still here for you.”

“I know you are.” Laurel smiled and nodded to the elevators. “And now go and see your kids.”

Felicity shot a brief look to John and Roy, who both nodded in agreement. Felicity squeezed Laurel’s fingers, turned around and left. She didn’t like to admit it, but she was glad that they were setting finding Malcolm back and would focus on freeing Oliver now. As much as she wanted Malcolm behind bars for the rest of her life, she wanted Oliver back more. She was sure that only that would calm their kids down.


	264. Felicity's solution

More than eighty-four hours had passed now since Oliver had turned himself in to the SCPD. He had been away for three and a half nights as well as three and a half days. In that time, she had only talked to him once because they didn’t allow any phone calls and it was incredibly hard to apply for visitations at Iron Heights, especially for possible serial killers in custody awaiting trial. Today was the first time she got to see him again since the morning after he had turned himself in and Laurel had convinced her boyfriend to let her see him for a few minutes. She would have to update him on Merlyn and try to take his worries about their family away from him because she knew him too well to think that he was relaxed. She was sure that he was as worried as a person could be.

Felicity’s hands were trembling slightly as she was watching her kids playing in the living room. Emmy and Tommy were sitting in the playpen with Addie, building little towers with building blocks for their baby sister to destroy with happy squeals. Meanwhile, William was sitting on the couch with Millie on his lap and reading her a story. They looked almost blithe as they were spending time together and taking care of the youngers. Looking at them now, it didn’t even seem like they had any deep worries.

The truth was that they missed their daddy and they were scared of losing him forever, though. William was still asking a lot of questions, trying to get behind what was happening here and why it was happening. Emmy and Tommy had terrible nightmares and had spent the last nights in bed with her. Millie was clingy, and she cried every time Felicity left the mansion to meet the team. Yesterday she had cried herself into a frenzy until her head had turned red and she had almost passed out from crying. Felicity hadn’t managed to bring herself to go then and stayed home with the kids instead until they had all been fast asleep. Addie was barely drinking or eating, and she cried even more than she usually did. A moment of quiet like this gave Felicity a little bit of hope that her kids weren’t on the verge of a breakdown, yet.

Things could always change, though. If Felicity knew something, it was that and, with the many things she still had on her plate and she still had to take care of, the enduring the fear of the damage her kids might take from this almost paralyzed her.

Malcolm Merlyn had disappeared without trace since the night they had fought him. Felicity had tried to intensify her search for him, but it hadn’t brought any results. Malcolm knew this city too well to let himself be caught and, with his resources, he could easily go everywhere he wanted. He had probably left the city or even the country already. While they had suspected that this would happen it still sucked a lot. Felicity would have liked to see Malcolm locked away in a small cell. She might have even thrown her moral standards overboard and not even minded if Lyla had planted one of these terrible chips that exploded into his head. There were people who deserved a hell on earth and Malcolm Merlyn, after everything he had done, especially to people who trusted him, deserved it more than anyone else.

Tommy’s condition was still unchanged too. They kept him sedated because they felt it was safer and more human than locking him into a cell or anything like that. Laurel had tried to get into contact with Nyssa, but hadn’t reached her yet. Felicity had tried to do some research in how to help him, but she didn’t even know what to look for since she didn’t know what had caused this craziness in Tommy. Laurel getting into contact with Nyssa was their only chance. At the same time, Felicity was worried about Laurel. She was terribly confused by what to do now as she felt she was trapped in the same situation she had been in when Oliver had come back home after the island. She was finally in a new relationship with a nice guy who was very serious about their relationship when an ex she still had unfinished business with returned from the dead. Liam was a really good man and he even felt sorry for having to press charges against Oliver.

And as if this wasn’t enough, they were still no step further in trying to find a way to save Oliver from going through a trail for God knew how many murders and whatever other crimes they would blame on him. While they had set up the minimum of things they needed in their new hideout, they had tried to brainstorm possibilities of how to free Oliver of all charges. John had even dressed up as the Arrow and hit the streets to chase some minor criminals. Apparently, the police hadn’t let themselves be impressed by it. They, correctly, assumed that one of the Arrow’s fans or companions was trying to save Oliver. The indictment against Oliver was built of sand apart from his admission. The admission itself was hard to take back, though. The only chance they had was to prove that Oliver was suffering from some mental problems that had made him do this, but then they’d stand in front of next problems as they would probably lock him away in a clinic which wasn’t any better.

The suspicions raised against Oliver’s brought additional problems for their family. After William had come here against his mother’s will, she had given Felicity a terribly angry call. She didn’t understand why they had pulled William into this with them. Felicity’s promise – or lie – that Oliver wasn’t the Arrow had only made Samantha angrier. She didn’t understand why Oliver would have turned himself in if he wasn’t that vigilante and put his kids, William included, through something like that. Felicity had no idea how she had managed to calm her down enough to convince her that the conversation about this had to wait until Oliver was free. There was still a ringing in her ear, even just thinking about the phone call.

Oliver’s candidature was on pause with no hope in sight. Really, Felicity had no idea how his candidature was supposed to recover from this even if the charges against him were dropped. Some people protested against charges being pressed against Oliver, repeating against and again that the Arrow was saving this city and not hurting it. Yet, politicians as well as most of the police and of course District Attorney Liam Hendricks all said they had no choice and it was the rightful thing to do this. The media adapted that a lot, rather supporting the law than the reality of all the good Oliver had done which, again, led people who didn’t know where to stand to think that hating the Arrow as a criminal was their only choice. Nobody wanted a criminal as mayor. Admittedly, it was the littlest of their problems, but it was a problem nonetheless.

Felicity took a sip from her tea, closing her burning eyes for a moment. She was still tired since she hadn’t caught much sleep since Oliver had turned himself in. She was restless and just lay in bed all night, unable to sleep. Sometimes she dozed off, but usually it didn’t last longer than half an hour. She had thought about taking a pill to at least get one night of sleep. Since she wasn’t breastfeeding anymore and with all the stress she had stopped expressing breastmilk completely, she could afford taking a pill. She never responded well to them though, so she hadn’t taken anything. Yet, she had decided to head to the pharmacy after visiting Oliver and get some pills, just in case.

At least her throat didn’t hurt that badly anymore. It still ached and the marks on her neck were even more visible, but she could swallow and talk more easily now. Her voice had come back almost completely which would make it easier to make Oliver believe that she just had a cold. She would tell him what had happened once he had been released. For now, he didn’t need more worries.

When Raisa stepped next to her, Felicity smiled at her for a moment. The way Raisa smile back at her in response comforted her. She was glad that she was here to help. Something about Raisa had this calming effect on her like everything was going to be okay. There was just something motherly about her.

“When will you have to go?” she asked her.

“In half an hour,” Felicity replied. “I will just drink the rest of my tea and then go upstairs to get dressed.”

Raisa nodded briefly. “Are you going to be away for long?”

Felicity knew there was no reproach in her voice. Raisa understood why Felicity had been away so often these past days. She knew she was working with the team to get Oliver back home safe. Felicity also knew that Raisa knew exactly how deep the kids’ pain went, so when she asked how long Felicity was going to be away, Felicity was sure it was a gentle reminder that her kids needed her now.

“I won’t be away for long,” Felicity promised. “I wanted to head to the pharmacy after visiting Oliver. I will hurry and come back right after that, though.”

Raisa smiled and nodded her head. “I was thinking of making spaghetti for dinner or maybe French Fries with Chicken nuggets, something easy and funny. It might cheer the kids up a little.”

“Sounds great,” Felicity replied. “The kids can’t be spoilt enough with how things are.”

“We will probably eat some ice cream and maybe watch a movie while you’re away.”

Felicity smiled. “I am sure that, if someone knows how to spoil the kids and distract them, it’s you. You have free reign.”

“Give Oliver my regards,” Raisa asked. “He is missed here.”

“Very much,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head. She held the warm porcelain of her mug against the top of her chest and sighed. “I hope this will all end really quickly for the kids’ sakes, for Oliver’s sake and for my sake too actually.”

Raisa nodded. “It’s going to help the two of you if you can see each other. Maybe, if you see him, you will actually be able to sleep tonight.”

Felicity shot Raisa a short look before she lowered her gaze. Of course Raisa had noticed that Felicity had been sleepless. She shouldn’t be surprised by it. Raisa lifted a hand to Felicity’s back and rubbed up and down gently.

“Seeing Oliver will do you good,” she whispered.

“Of course,” Felicity replied. “I was thinking about asking for a visit with the kids, but I am not sure if that is a good idea yet. I don’t want them to get scared. Iron Heights isn’t really a friendly place, especially for kids. I don’t really feel comfortable about going there, but I feel even less comfortable about taking the kids there. All the criminals in there…”

“If all of this doesn’t end well, you will have to take them,” Raisa replied with soft voice. “They will have to see their daddy again eventually.”

“I know.”

Felicity released a long sigh. She had no idea how they were supposed to continue when Oliver was convicted. She had actually considered breaking Oliver out of Iron Heights. She knew with John and Lyla on her side, she’d be able to do that. He would have to live in secret, though, and their family wouldn’t have another calm moment for the rest of their lives. The police would chase them wherever they went, always hoping to catch Oliver eventually. That would never work. They would have to find another way.

When Felicity had taken the last sip of her tea, Raisa held out her hands and said, “You can give that to me.”

“Thank you,” Felicity replied. “I’ll go upstairs and get ready.”

Raisa nodded, so Felicity turned to the stairs and headed upstairs. Despite all the mess, she was looking forward to meeting Oliver now. He had to be dying to hear what they had worked on so far and maybe he had even come up with a plan by now. She could only hope so since they really needed a plan and they needed it soon. She’d go insane if they didn’t.

 

 

“Ninety-eight, Ninety-nine, hundred.”

With a low groan, Oliver lowered himself to the floor completely. He pressed his sweaty forehead against the cold concrete and squeezed his eyes shut. His muscles were aching, and they had already been aching during his second set of pushups. Since there was nothing he could do in here apart from pushups, squats and sit-ups or brooding, he had chosen for the training.

Oliver pushed himself up onto his feet and straightened up. He walked over to the small sink and washed his face and chest. He pulled up the upper part of the dark blue overall and slipped into the sleeves before buttoning up the piece of clothing. The prison warder who had brought him his breakfast this morning had told him that he had seen Felicity had applied for a visit for today, and it had been granted. He wanted to look as okay as possible when he met her. He didn’t want her to worry as she had probably enough things to worry about already.

Last night, when he hadn’t been able to sleep without Felicity by his side and her even heartbeat in her ear, he had just imagined her being there. Not in prison, of course, but just there with him. He had almost heard her voice in his ear when she had told him how good he looked in blue. He had soon realized that it only made him miss Felicity more, so he had pushed his thoughts of her aside and just counted sheep instead like a six-year-old.

Releasing a low sigh, Oliver sat down on the edge of the cot and leaned his head back against the cold wall. He closed his eyes and smiled slightly at the thought that he’d get to see Felicity again in a few minutes. He missed his family like crazy. He couldn’t sleep. He barely ate. He often found himself being pulled back into past behavior and old thoughts – brooding and aggressiveness the two strongest. Missing his family and knowing there was a real chance he wouldn’t be a part of their life the way he had been so far did this to him. It was definitely a part of why he was so relieved to see her today, the other being that he just missed her. As simple as that.

He wondered what she and the team had worked on so far. He hadn’t had much time to figure out anything since the police was still coming here regularly to question him. He had added a few details to the stories he had already told them, but he hadn’t given away anything more. So far, he hadn’t even told them about the foundry. He knew that he would have to do so soon, though. The last he wanted was for them to questions his friends or, even worse, his family. He’d rather keep them interested by giving away the foundry. That would occupy them for a while. He was surprised that he hadn’t been confronted with any of the evidence Susan Williams had gathered against him. It was part of why he hadn’t told the police about the foundry yet. He knew it was one of the next steps, though. He just had to counter-check if Felicity and the rest of the team had already cleared it from any evidence of who he was working with.

“Queen.”

At the sound of his name, Oliver looked up to see one of the warders standing in front of the bars to his cell. He was playing with a large envelope, turning it between his fingers.

“Visiting hours?” Oliver asked.

“In a few minutes,” the warder replied, “but first you got post.”

He pushed the envelope into the cell through two bars and Oliver took it. He noticed that it had already been opened, but didn’t let that stop him from pulling out whatever was inside. He knew that, as long as he was in arrest, the prison director would check all post he received.

With a smile, Oliver looked at the photo that had been inside. They had taken it only two weeks ago when they had spent a family weekend together. They were all sitting on the floor after they had enjoyed some afternoon snacks during an indoor picnic in their living room. Oliver was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the blanket they had spread on the floor, Felicity sitting next to him with her legs draped over his and her body snuggled to his side. Their kids were sitting around them, all of them smiling into the camera just like he did. Felicity was the only one who didn’t look at the camera. Her chin was resting on his shoulder as she was smiling at him adoringly with so much love in her eyes that even just seeing the photos made his stomach flutter with a hundred butterflies.

Oliver could only hope that he’d still get moments like this in the future. As much as he felt like turning himself in had been the only way to keep the upper hand and it hadn’t just been the right but also the only thing for him to do, he knew that it could cost him dearly. He had needed to take this step to keep a little more in control than he would have if he had been exposed. Felicity leaving him had never been an option he would have been okay with. Yet, the road he had taken wasn’t exactly helping his family to be happy and united, either.

Still staring at the photo in his hand, Oliver moved his fingers through his short hair almost violently. His short fingernails scratched over his scalp so much that it hurt. He barely dared to close his eyes at night, scared of seeing the sad and frightened expression in Felicity’s eyes when he told her that he would turn himself in. She had begged him not to do it and, yet, he had left. He knew how much she had suffered from being abandoned by her dad. No matter how much he told himself that he had just done what he had to do to protect his family, he couldn’t get rid of the feeling that he had abandoned her in some way.

When he heard the clank of chains, Oliver lifted his gaze. The warder – Jones was his name according to the small nameplate at his uniform – looked slightly uncomfortable as he was playing with the handcuffs that were attached to the leg irons.

“Sorry,” Jones said, “but you know the rules, Queen.”

Oliver nodded. Because of the crimes he was suspected of, the judge had decided on quite strong safety measures. He had been locked away in an individual cell in the high-security wing. Since he was left alone most of the time here, Oliver didn’t mind much. Yet, thinking about how hard it would be for Felicity to see him in handcuffs and leg irons. He knew he’d freak out if he had to see her like that.

“Sure,” Oliver just replied quietly.

He folded the photo of his family a few times until it fit into the small pocket on the front of the overall. Then he got up and stepped in front of the bars where a small gap on the height of his hands and another one down on the floor had been left for him to put his hand and his feet through. While Jones was putting the handcuffs and the leg irons on and connected the two with a chain, two other warders kept their machine guns pointed at him, ready to shoot if he made one wrong move.

“Good idea to keep the photo to yourself,” Jones said to him quietly. “I’d keep good care of it if I was you.”

Oliver nodded slowly, knowing exactly what Jones referred to. The guy in the cell to his right was a serial killer who had erased eight families. He had only left the fathers alive, leaving them to grieve the deaths of their wives and children. Rumor here in Iron Heights had it that he let family pictures from other inmates steal to collect them and imagine what he’d do to them. That was why Oliver wouldn’t let this photo out of sight ever.

Once the handcuffs and leg irons had made him almost unable to move, Jones called for the electric lock to be opened and then unlocked the other three locks manually. He nodded for Oliver to step out and he did. Jones grabbed his elbow lightly, leading him through the hallway. The two armed warders followed them, still ready to shoot when necessary.

“Since it’s your first visit, I am going to tell you how this will work,” Jones said. “I am going to lead you to the protected visiting area. You will be put in another cell there where you can sit down in front of a shatterproof window. We are going to take away the chain between the handcuffs and the leg irons. Then you can sit down and talk to your wife. She will already be waiting there. If you cause trouble-“

“I am not going to,” Oliver interrupted him.

He had to admit that he had hoped that maybe he could see Felicity without any glass between them. He wanted to touch her face and lean his head against hers. He had been able to see his mother without any barriers between them when she had been waiting for her trail after the Undertaking. He guessed that he was treated with more thorough caution because he was said to be a well-trained serial killer which was probably thought to be more dangerous than a high society housewife who had been blackmailed into engaging in a terroristic act.

“I have to tell you what will happen anyway,” Jones replied brusquely. “If you cause any trouble, we are going to take you out and take you to the solitary confinement. You won’t be allowed to have any visits anymore if that happens.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied, nodding.

“When the visit is over, after one hour at max, you will get up and step to the bars. We will put the chain back on and lead you back to your cell.”

Again, Oliver nodded. “Okay.”

As soon as they entered the protected visiting area, Oliver took a quick look around to take in his surroundings. There were ten cells for inmates that were visited. Three of them were currently occupied. Oliver tensed as he saw that Rupert Harding, a guy who had impersonated the Dollmaker, going around to rape and kill women, was there with his sister, too. His fingers were twitching with the need to do something when he saw Harding’s gaze moving from his sister to where Felicity was sitting. Maybe she shouldn’t have come here.

As he was taking the last steps to the visiting cell, he focused on Felicity, knowing it was probably going to calm him down. When he directed his eyes onto her and looked at her, it didn’t have the hoped effect, though. Instead, Oliver just felt himself tense even more. He couldn’t even return the smile she shot him when she saw him.

Oliver entered the small cell and turned back to the closed bars for Jones to take away the chain. He waited until his hands and feet were no longer linked together before he turned back around to Felicity. He stepped closed until he could sit down on the chair in front of the glass window. He still didn’t smile, but it didn’t keep Felicity from still smiling at him though he did notice the small changes in her smile that proved she was growing insecure. When Oliver grabbed the phone to talk to her, so did she.

“Hey. How-“

“What happened?” Oliver interrupted her immediately, his voice sounding urgent.

Felicity frowned. “A lot happened, but-“

“With your neck,” Oliver interrupted her again, feeling terribly impatient and like his control was slipping away from him. “What happened with your neck?”

“I-“

“Don’t you dare lying to me again!”

He had meant to say it as a whisper, just to gently remind her that they had promised never to lie to each other again. Almost four days of being away from his family and being locked away in a cell that was barely wide enough to take five steps in the same direction were pulling him further back into past behavior than he might have noticed by now. Knowing his family had to deal with this mess and he wasn’t there to protect them made the last bit of control he had slip. It was why the words had come out as a shout.

“Queen!” Jones shouted behind him. “First and last warning! Behave or visits are over for today.”

Oliver’s hand tightened around the receiver for a moment. His eyes stayed locked on Felicity, who looked slightly in shock about his outburst. Squeezing his eyes shut, Oliver put the receiver down for a moment. He rubbed his hands over his face, reminding himself that he was not the angry man he used to be. Whatever had happened had happened and he couldn’t take it back. Yelling at Felicity, who was probably going through hell with her own fear and the kids’ fear and everything else, wasn’t fair to her.

Oliver took in a deep breath. He had sixty minutes to talk to her at max. He shouldn’t use them to yell at her. What he should use them for instead was asking how she was doing, how the kids were doing, what the team had found out yet and if he had found a way to fix this mess. He needed to really use the little time he had. Taking another deep breath, Oliver took back the receiver, holding it to his ear, and lifted his gaze to Felicity.

“Hi, Felicity,” Oliver whispered, his voice now all soft with a tone that was reserved just for her. “I am so glad you have come. I have missed you.”

Felicity smiled at him softly, cocking her head slightly. He had no doubt that she knew exactly what had gotten into him before. She knew it. She understood it. She forgave it. All of that wordlessly.

“I miss you too,” she whispered, “like the kids are missing you.”

Oliver felt a twitch of guilt. He hated having left Felicity, and he hated having left their children. He had never wanted to be the kinds of dad that just disappeared.

“How bad is it for them?”

Felicity lowered her gaze for a moment and Oliver felt his stomach twist. Whatever Felicity would say now, he knew the truth was a thousand times worse.

“It’s hard,” Felicity replied. She shrugged her shoulders. “The reporters were waiting for us in front of the house. One of them snuck into the garden and climbed the growth support to take photos of them.”

“What?” Oliver asked, feeling his heart skipping a beat. “Are they okay?”

“Millie is in shock,” Felicity explained, “and we both know she doesn’t lose her balance easily.”

Oliver nodded. Millie was the most relaxed of the kids, always had been. “I hope you complained to the police.”

Felicity nodded. “Bruce’s lawyers are taking care of it for me.”

“Good,” Oliver replied. “Did you ask him or Lyla for some security?”

“Lyla sent me some agents and Bruce hired a few bodyguards. Emmy is still not going to school and we… we actually moved out of our house for now.”

Oliver’s heart broke just a little bit more at that. Though he understood, knowing that she wasn’t feeling safe in the house had built for her, hurt him more than he dared to admit.

“Where are you living now?”

“In the mansion,” Felicity replied. When Oliver looked at her with surprise, she explained, “I let it build back up a few years ago. It’s nice for the kids to know how you grew up, but they… It’s hard for them.”

Oliver nodded slowly. They knew how sensitive the kids had been to the changes in Felicity’s behavior when she had suffered from depression. He didn’t want to imagine how they felt with their daddy missing and their mommy probably tearing herself apart to make everything work. They didn’t even live in their home but a foreign house. At least they could pretend to be living in an entranced castle like Thea had liked to do when she had been a kid. Yet, it had to be hell for them.

“What about William?” he asked. “Does he know?”

Felicity nodded. “William and my mom know.”

“And?” he asked, feeling terribly nervous about how they might have reacted. “How did they take it.”

Felicity screwed up her face slightly and shrugged her shoulders. “Could have been worse?”

Oliver frowned. “Which means?”

Again, Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I managed to calm my mother down for now. William is willing to wait with his judgement until he knows the entire story, preferably from you of course.”

Oliver nodded. “I will tell him everything. Thank you for having my back.”

“Always,” Felicity replied with an almost sad smile. “It’s the least I can do. I was thinking about bringing the kids here to see you, but-“

“Don’t,” Oliver interrupted her quickly, shaking his head. He shot a short look to Harding, whose eyes were still looking in their direction suspiciously often. Oliver’s fingers tightened around the receiver in response. “This is not the right place for them.”

Felicity nodded. “I felt the same way. It’s why I didn’t bring them.”

Oliver nodded. As much as he wanted to see the kids, he knew taking them here was a terrible idea. With the other inmates and the safety measures here, it would only scare them. Protecting his kids from pain had always been his first priority. He wouldn’t stop with it now.

His eyes found Felicity’s again. Oliver bit down on his tongue for a moment, wondering what was the best idea to address what he wanted to know. He cleared this throat to make sure he wasn’t going to burst out like he had before.

“You are wearing turtle neck,” he said, relieved that his voice sounded as softly as he had intended. “You don’t like wearing turtle neck.”

Felicity sucked her bottom lip between her front teeth, biting down on it. She hesitated, obviously considering what to do. Eventually, he grabbed the turtleneck collar of her top and tugged it down, though. Oliver felt a burning pain in the pit of his stomach, worry about how much suffering she had really had to take in the past days mixing with blind rage.

“What happened?” he whispered urgently. “Who did this to you? Are you okay?”

“It’s getting better,” Felicity replied honestly. “It hurts, but it’s getting better. It’s how this happened that I need to talk about with you.”

Oliver frowned. “Why? What happened?”

“Do you know that the Dragon Lady never published the evidence she showed me?”

“I was wondering if she had,” Oliver admitted, “since the police never confronted me with it.”

“I knew there was something more behind this because none of it made sense,” Felicity explained in a whisper. “John and I found her in a hotel the night after you turned yourself in and talked to her. She said she was blackmailed into doing this and, when you turned yourself in instead of me leaving you, she was chased out of the city.”

Oliver frowned even more. He knew he had enemies, a lot of enemies even. Yet, he couldn’t imagine who’d do something like this.

“Who blackmailed her?”

“She didn’t know who they were, but from her description I took that the one guy was Malcolm,” Felicity replied. “I showed her a photo, and she confirmed it.”

Oliver released a breath, squeezing his eyes shut. All those years ago, when he had killed Malcolm Merlyn, he had been sure it had been the right thing. When he had returned and confronted him with what he had made Thea do to Sara, Oliver could have killed him again. It hadn’t been until Thea had extradited him to the League that he had felt unable to let Malcolm die. He hadn’t wanted for his sister to be partly responsible for her father’s death. He knew from experience how hard it was to live with that. He should have known that Malcolm would use the first opportunity given to stab them in the back.

“He is back?”

Felicity nodded. “John and I were just leaving the hotel when we were attacked. The guy shot John, so he lost consciousness. He introduced himself as Al- Al- I don’t remember. Al Something. John said it means the son.”

“Al Ibn?” Oliver asked, his frown deepening. “Malcolm has a son?”

“Well, we knew he has, right?”

Oliver was already about to ask what she meant when he suddenly understood what he meant. There was a thick lump building in his throat, his mind going almost completely blank.

“Tommy?”

Felicity nodded. “Yes, it’s Tommy.”

Oliver suddenly felt himself being pulled back to the day his best friend had died in his arms and the days that had followed – days of grief and days of utter sadness. He had left. He had stood up at Tommy’s funeral for the eulogy and then he had left. He had gone back to the island because even the island had been a better place than Starling at that time. On Lian Yu, he had been able to think and to get clean with himself. Well, at least he had tried.

“How?” Oliver asked eventually, looking at Felicity desperately. “And why would he help Malcolm?”

“We don’t know yet,” Felicity admitted. “Malcolm certainly has his ways to bring people back from the dead. However we did it, it did terrible things to Tommy’s soul. He’s… We had to sedate him and we are keeping him sedated as long as Laurel hasn’t answer from Nyssa. She tried to get into touch with her to find out how to help Tommy.”

“You already found him?” Oliver asked, unable to process how he was feeling about everything else yet.

Felicity nodded. “Malcolm escaped, though.”

“We can take care of Malcolm later,” Oliver replied. “What matters is that you are all safe and we find a way to help Tommy.”

“And a way to get you out of here,” Felicity added.

“Any luck on that?” Oliver asked.

Felicity looked at him for a moment before she lowered her eyes, tears welling in them as she did so. She had managed to achieve so much in the last days already. Yet, she was feeling guilty for the little she hadn’t achieved yet.

“I am sorry for putting you and the kids through so much,” Oliver whispered.

Felicity lifted her gaze, smiling at him sadly. “It wouldn’t be worth it if it was for anyone else.”

Oliver smiled sadly, letting this declaration of love and devotion filling his chest and comfort him. So many things in this world changed and were instable. Not the way he and Felicity felt for each other and the life they had built together, though. That would never change.

“I love you,” Oliver whispered, “now more than ever.”

Felicity smiled back, replying, “I love you too. Now more than ever.”

Oliver held the phone between his ear and his shoulder. Then he reached out his hands and held them to the glass. Felicity smiled sadly and put her fingers to the other side of the glass. It was almost like they could touch. Almost, not quite, but he’d take what he got.

 

 

Felicity shot a nervous glance at her watch, swearing under her breath. She hadn’t meant to stay away for so long, but it had taken half an hour until she had gotten through all the safety measures and she had used every second she had gotten with Oliver. On her way to the pharmacy, she had gotten trapped in traffic and then it had taken forever to get the pills. Now she had been away from home for almost four hours.

Hurrying to her car, Felicity thought back to meeting Oliver. She doubted that the little time they had had had been enough for him to process what she had told him. She had seen Tommy and, yet, she couldn’t believe that he was back. For Oliver, who had seen his friend dying, it had to be a thousand times harder. It had to be heel for him to-

“Mrs. Queen?”

“No comment!” Felicity just called, not even looking back over her shoulder.

“I just wanted-“

“Okay, listen, you little piece of-”

Felicity had turned around to whatever scum of a reporter had followed her all the way and wanted to talk to her about Oliver’s situation on the middle of the sideway. She had been ready so say some pretty mean things since she had a lot of bottled-up anger inside of her. As soon as she saw the man who seemed to have follow her, though, she frowned. The man with the sparse hair and the pale skin was panting like he had been running for hours. He was smiling in relief that she had stopped, but he was holding out his forefinger in front of him, wordlessly asking her to give him a few seconds, so he could catch his breath.

“You’re not a reporter,” Felicity said.

“No, I am not,” he panted. “I am- I wanted to-“

When he coughed from the panting breaths, almost looking like he was about to collapse, Felicity put her hand to his elbow and gently tugged him out of the way of passing people. She helped him to lean against her car and quickly grabbed a bottle of water from the rear bench seat. She had never been more grateful for always having some bottles of waters with her in case the kids got thirsty.

“Here,” Felicity said, opening the bottle of water and handing it to the man.

“Thanks,” he gasped between to breaths.

Felicity watched him taking a few sips. She didn’t know the man or at least she didn’t remember him, but it didn’t change that she was worried. He didn’t look healthy. At the same time, she almost felt a little responsible for this given he had run after her and she had almost snapped at him.

“Can I drive you anywhere?” Felicity asked when he had had left. “Home or to a doctor maybe?”

The man took a deep breath, finally able to relax a little. He put on a polite but honest smile and shook his head.

“Thank you,” he replied, “but I actually need to talk to you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Felicity said hurriedly. “I am on my way home. I am already late and-“

“Mrs. Queen, I-“ the man took a quick look around and screwed up his face. “I really need to talk to you in private.”

Felicity frowned. “I really don’t have-“

“I am going to turn myself in for being the Arrow.”

“What?” Felicity asked, unsure if she had even understood correctly. “You- I mean- What?”

“Can we…?” He gestured at the car, making Felicity frown even more. He seemed to catch up on her hesitation as he quickly held out his hand. “I am sorry. I haven’t even introduced myself. I am Lucas Barnes.”

Felicity shook his hand, still not sure what to think about what he had told her. She felt like the name Barnes should ring a bell, but she was sleep-deprived, physically and emotionally exhausted and also terribly confused. If that name should be familiar, she didn’t remember where she had heard it.

“Would you mind if we…?” he asked, gesturing to the car once more. When Felicity still hesitated, Mr. Barnes lifted his hands like a criminal turning himself in and showing he was unarmed. “I am a dying man, Mrs. Queen. Trust me, there is nothing to fear from me.”

Though Felicity still wasn’t sure she could really trust him, wasn’t even sure if he said the truth about dying, she nodded. She unlocked the car and sat down in the driver’s seat, waiting for Mr. Barnes to take the seat next to her. Why would he turn himself in for being the Arrow when he obviously wasn’t him and why would he want to talk to her about it? The world seemed to have lost its balance recently. When Mr. Barnes sat down next to her, Felicity turned to him, playing with the key between her fingers.

He didn’t waste a second to explain, “I have esophageal cancer with metastases in basically every organ. I was diagnosed with it a couple of weeks ago and, according to the doctors, the cancer has processed too far to get control over it. They offered therapy to give me more time, but I declined. I don’t want to spend the last few weeks of my life in a hospital. I have until Christmas, so I want to make the best of it.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, frowning slightly. She was unsure what to say. She felt sorry for Mr. Barnes since she couldn’t even imagine what it was like to be diagnose with a disease that couldn’t be cured. If she had only a couple of weeks to live, she’d make the best of her time too. She would spend as much time with her family as possible and maybe try to work on some things she had always wanted to try but never had.

“I don’t understand what-“

“I became a father at nineteen,” he explained. “It was a total surprise, but I was so in love with my girlfriend that I said we will do this. Jamila and I got married, and Aurora was born. We were young, and we struggled, but we managed to make it.”

Felicity nodded, unsure of what to say, so she just didn’t say anything.

“My wife died in 2012,” he explained. “A car crash. The driver had just robbed a bank and was counting his money instead of taking care of the street. He just left her there to die. The police found him only later.”

“I am sorry,” Felicity whispered.

Mr. Barned shot her a sad smile. “Jamila was the love of my life, and losing her was so very hard. That’s eleven years ago now. My daughter was only nine at that time. She turned into the center of my life then. Nothing was more important than her, and I probably took care a little too well of her. I put her in cotton wool, much to her anger. I just couldn’t lose her.”

Felicity nodded. If Oliver died – God forbid! – she’d keep an even more thorough eye on her kids. She wouldn’t leave them alone. They would turn into the most important thing for her, even more important than they were already now. She’d give up the company and every other obligation she had to have more times with the kids. They’d get her unshared attention whether they wanted to or not.

“On February 14th 2017, my daughter was on her way home from her dance class. It was the day that several prisoners had escaped and were causing chaos in the city. They had hacked into the traffic lights. Aurora was just crossing the street when a car almost hit her,” he explained, the pain at the thought what could have happened in his voice obvious. “It would hit her if the Arrow hadn’t managed to save her.”

Felicity smiled softly. She remembered how annoyed she had been with Oliver that night. She had been in labor, Emmy on her way. Oliver had tried to be there for her, but his overprotectiveness and worry and whatever else had made it so hard for her to endure him. She had been in pain and felt like Oliver hadn’t been helping. Hence, she had sent him away happily when John had asked for his help with some escaped A.R.G.U.S. prisoners. She hadn’t known that one of them, Cupid, had planned on coming for her and Emmy that day.

At least now she knew why the name Barnes had rang a bell.

“The Arrow saved my daughter, the most important person to me,” Mr. Barnes continued. “I gave her away on her wedding last month. She accelerated her wedding for me to be there. Now she told me she is having her first baby. She wouldn’t have gotten the chance to have any of this if it wasn’t for the Arrow.”

“The Arrow has done some great things for the city,” Felicity replied softly, nodding her head. “He does good and he doesn’t ask for anything in return.”

“He doesn’t have to ask,” Mr. Barned replied. “I want to do it.”

Felicity believed that he was honest with her. The way he looked at her with the reminiscent smile on his lips gave it away. She doubted that he was pretending.

“It’s really generous of you,” Felicity stated, “but I am not sure it’s a clever idea. Enjoy your last weeks. My husband is innocent, and I am sure the police will come to the same conclusion.”

“Do you know what the Arrow told my daughter when she thanked him for saving him?” he asked. When Felicity shook her head, he replied, “He told her that he was having his first child that night and that he was hoping it was a girl. That night, only seven children were born in Starling City General. Your first daughter was one of them.”

When Oliver had returned to her that night and the stress of birth had been over, they had lain in bed together, holding their first baby. He had told her about saving a girl named Aurora Barnes and how he had told her that he going to be a father. Felicity had been worried if it had been a good idea to tell someone something so private, but Oliver, for the first time, hadn’t been worried, so she had let his calmness infect her. It had been nice to see him at peace so much for the first time since she had known him.

“You did research.”

“I always wanted to thank the man who saved my daughter,” he replied with a smile. “Your husband saved me from a life without my daughter. Now I am going to save his children from a life without their father.”

Felicity smiled sadly. Oliver wasn’t doing what he was doing for people to thank him. They had established that a long time ago. At the same time, Felicity felt it was terribly unfair that some people demonized him when all he wanted to do was making their lives safer. Knowing Mr. Barnes appreciated what Oliver had done for him.

“You should use the time you have to spend with your daughter,” Felicity told him. “Everything else is not your problem.”

Mr. Barnes smiled. “Mrs. Queen, I have seen my daughter getting married to the best man I could have wished for. I know she will have a family of her own soon. I am still kind of fit, but my heath condition is going to get worse quickly. I said goodbye to my daughter. I explained this to her and she agrees. She wants her baby to have someone who saves her if she needs it. The Arrow is a symbol for that, but I am sure your husband will find a way to let live on what the Arrow stands for. And if he becomes mayor, he will be there for this city in every way possible. I’d just like to contribute to this in a way.”

Felicity understood what he meant. She had wanted to contribute to doing good in this world too. If she was dying and had nothing left to lose, she might go to more drastic measures to help saving people too.

“Are you sure?” she asked.

Mr. Barnes nodded firmly. “Absolutely.”

Felicity looked at his face closely. She saw no doubt. He wanted to do this. Though she doubted that he should really spend the last of his days like that, Felicity felt like this was their only chance to get Oliver out there. The police wouldn’t fall for John impersonating as the Arrow. What they needed was another suspect, one that was more believable because he offered the evidence Oliver had yet failed to deliver.

“If we do this,” Felicity said, “we need a really good plan and a really good story. And we need both of it was soon as possible.”

“Well, I can offer a story,” Mr. Barnes stated, “so I was hoping you could come up with a plan.”

Felicity nodded to herself slowly. “Actually, I might.”


	265. Oliver's return

_Once more this week, we have to interrupt our usual program for breaking news. According to an official statement that was just released from the district attorney’s office, the investigations regarding Starling City’s most controversial vigilante, The Arrow, take another turn as a second person turned himself into the SCPD. Earlier this week, Oliver Queen made headlines with turning himself in for being the vigilante formerly known as The Hood. Queen’s admission surprised the police and district attorney’s office as nothing had pointed at him being the vigilante after he had been cleared from all suspicions in autumn 2012. Queen disappeared in 2007 when his father’s boat sank and was said to leave no survivors. The rise of the vigilante happened just few days after Queen’s return in October 2012. After video footage showed him with The Hood’s equipment, charges were pressed against him, but quickly dropped when the Hood made an appearance while Queen had still been under house arrest. Ever since, the police had speculated about the vigilante’s identity. Though Queen didn’t give much information after he turned himself in in the night from Sunday to Monday, clues pointed at his admission being truthful. Back in the early days of Starling City’s vigilantism, media already suggested a possible connection between Queen’s return and the rise of the Hood as a coincidence had seemed unlikely at that point. In addition to that, it seemed conspicuous that the Hood disappeared for five months following the Undertaking, the terroristic attack that killed over five hundred people. Queen lost his best friend, Thomas Merlyn, during the attack. Merlyn’s father, alongside Queen’s mother, were responsible for the terroristic attack even if Moira Queen was later found not guilty by a jury as she had been blackmailed into her part of the attack. The vigilante’s return went along with a new name and the dismissal of killing while the Hood was known for dropping bodies right and left. Since then, he gained a team with at least four more vigilantes known as Spartan, Arsenal, Speedy and Black Canary. The hidden collaboration of tech-skilled sidekicks was suspected but never actually proven. Only now the police confirmed that a second suspect turned himself in this morning. These turns have been kept under wraps until the suspect’s admission could be further investigated. As the news have now dropped, it seems the admission was convincing and, hence charges against Queen are dropped once more. According to the official statement, Lucas Barnes turned himself in and offered his hideout as evidence. Especially this revelation made his admission believable, while Queen offered a lot of clues, but not evidence. According to District Attorney Liam Hendricks, Barnes put on the hood in 2012 after his wife died in a car crash that killed his wife, leaving him alone with his daughter. As it was caused by a bank raider, Barnes committed himself to fighting criminals in the city. Out of love for his sister who died during the Undertaking, he stopped killing and renamed himself to the Arrow. Barnes learned that he is suffering from cancer a few weeks ago. According to his account, he feared being outed as the vigilante before his daughter’s wedding and used Queen’s mother’s involvement in the Undertaking to guilt Queen into turning himself in instead and buy time for him. In addition to that he blackmailed him with the hideout that is coincidentally located in the basement of Verdant, a club owned by Queen and led by Queen’s brother-in-law, Roy Harper. A lease contract proves that the basement had been used by Barnes since 2013, apparently without Queen’s knowledge of what it was used for. Barnes used his admission to apologize to all victims, but at the same time said he hoped what the Arrow stands for – safety, justice and hope – won’t die. The identity of the other vigilantes continues to be a secret as Barnes refuses to give out their names. The case will be looked into more thoroughly in the following weeks, but Hendricks already confirmed that charges will be pressed. Queen is currently being prepared for his releasement. According to one of our reporters who keeps us updated, Queen’s wife just arrived at the prison to pick up her husband. It’s left to see if he will continue engaging in local politics or not. More information about the new developments on this case after a short commercial break. Follow us on Twitter to get all info as soon as available._

 

 

“Ready to go home?”

Oliver chuckled, stroking his hands over his shirt. He had barely ever been happier about getting out of his clothes than when he had finally been able to take off that terrible prison uniform. It was good to be back in his own clothes.

“Always have been,” Oliver replied.

Liam smiled at him briefly before he pushed the box with the rest of Oliver’s belongings – his belt, his watch, his wallet and his keys – closer to Oliver. He picked up the items, pushing wallet and keys into the pockets of his jeans and putting on his watch and his belt. Once he was finished with that, he lifted his gaze again and gave Liam a shot nod, wordlessly telling him he was ready to go.

He had never been readier to go home and see his family again. He wanted to crush Felicity to his chest and kiss her until they were both aching for breath. Then he’d just keep her closer and call all his kids to come to him, so he could hug and kiss them too. He had started missing his family the moment he had left the house to turn himself in and it had only grown more intense since.

Oliver couldn’t deny that he had been more than surprised when Jones had gotten him from his cell an hour ago and taken him to the visiting area for lawyers where Liam had told him that the charges again him were dropped. He had told him that someone had admitted the crime and also admitted on emotionally blackmailing him into turning himself in for something he hadn’t done. Oliver had had no idea what it all meant, still hadn’t, but he had played along. Maybe this was Felicity’s plan though he didn’t see how she would be okay with someone else going into prison for him. At least he wasn’t okay with that.

When Liam didn’t make any move, Oliver frowned. “Do I have more papers to sign or anything?”

“No,” Liam replied quickly, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants. He hunched his shoulders and ducked his head a little, looking slightly uncomfortable. “There is actually something else.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “If you need me to testify against that guy, I am not sure-“

“No, it’s not that either,” Liam interrupted him. He sighed. “It’s actually more of a private matter. I know I was pressing charges against you and I am not sure you will believe me, but I wasn’t exactly feeling comfortable about it. I was actually about to pass on the case to one of my colleges. I just want you to know that I am sorry. I don’t want things between us to be weird from now on. Our kids are friends. I am with your ex-girlfriend who happens to be a good friend of your family and-“

“You just did your job,” Oliver interrupted him quickly, briefly wondering if Laurel hadn’t told him about Tommy yet or if Tommy’s return wasn’t going to change anything for her. “It doesn’t matter, especially since I was the one turning myself in. I have already forgotten all about it, so you should too.”

Liam released a breath of relief. “Thanks.”

“No problem,” Oliver replied honestly. “Can I go now?”

“Yes, of course,” Liam replied. He knocked at the door to the hallway and one of the wardens opened for them. While Liam was leading him down the hallway to the reception, he said, “I think I saw Felicity arriving while I was waiting for you. I called her from the car to let her know she could pick you up.”

Oliver couldn’t contain the smile that spread on his lips. He hadn’t been sure if Felicity already knew about his releasement or if he had to call her to pick him up. He was glad that seeing her again wasn’t any further delayed as necessary. Being reunited with his family was what he wanted the most right now, understanding what exactly had gotten him out of here a close second.

When another warden opened the door at the end of the hallway and Oliver stepped into the small reception area where visitors had to wait, his eyes found Felicity immediately. She was standing at the window, looking back at him like she had been staring at the door impatiently for some time already. She pulled her bottom lip between her front teeth and bit down on it, definitely a way for her to control her emotions, just like rubbing his thumbs against his fingertips was for him.

“Hey,” he was the first to speak, his smile now widening even more and spreading over his entire face.

“Hi,” Felicity replied, a breath of relief leaving her as she spoke.

Oliver just looked at Felicity for a long moment. She looked exhausted, her face a little paler than usually. It made the shadows under her eyes only seem darker though she had tried to cover them under her make up. Again, she was wearing a turtleneck top to cover the bruises on her neck. Oliver wasn’t sure if it was real or just imagination, but she looked like she had lost weight. The week had definitely been as hard as her as it had been on him.

When the door to the hallway fell shut behind him, he finally snapped out of his frozen state. He lifted his hand and beckoned Felicity to come closer, making a come-here-gesture with his index finger. Felicity didn’t hesitate for even a second. She approached him immediately, letting Oliver engulf her in a tight hug. His arms wrapped around her shoulder, pulling her into his embrace, while she was wrapping her arms around his waist and snuggled into his embrace. Oliver hid his face against the side of her neck, pressing his nose against her delicate skin there and breathing her in. Only now he realized how much he had really missed her and holding her. He was so used to feeling the warmth of her body and smelling the scent of her skin that he was feeling like he was lacking a part of himself whenever it was taken from him for too long.

“I missed you,” he whispered against her skin and closed his eyes, tightening his arms around her. “You have no idea how much I missed you.”

“Trust me,” Felicity whispered back, “I do.”

Oliver brushed his lips against her pulse point, feeling a stitch of guilt. He knew he wasn’t the only one who had been in pain the last couple of days.

“Of course you do,” he replied. With a last brush of his lips against her neck, he pulled away, still keeping her close. “I’m sorry.”

“No reason to be.” Felicity smiled, stroking her hand up and down his chest, and nodded to the door. “Let’s go home.”

“Let’s go home,” Oliver agreed.

As they headed to the door, Felicity kept her arms around his waist and leaned into his side. Oliver held his arm around her shoulders protectively, kissing the top of her head.

“I should warn you that there are reporters out there,” Felicity told him.

Oliver sighed, tightening his arm around her. “We will just walk past them to the car.”

“I took the limo because I will kiss you senseless the second the doors are shut.”

Oliver had barely time to enjoy the way his lips prickled at the thrill of anticipation because Felicity was already opening the door. There were only a couple of feet between the reception and the visitors’ entrance. The moment he set a foot outside, he heard the reporters already asking their questions. While he had learned to handle the press, he had no interest in having any of them close right now. All he wanted was to get in the back of that limo and use the drive home to kiss his wife and get a few infos on what had happened since she had last visited him. What he didn’t want was to answer any questions or to have them hassle Felicity and her.

“I hope you’re ready,” Felicity whispered when the warden at the gate opened it.

Oliver tightened his arm around Felicity even more, pressing her to his side as closely as possible. He didn’t even listen to the questions they were asked as they pushed themselves through the crowd of reporters. He just held Felicity to her, protecting her from the crowd, and used his other arm to push away whoever got in their way. If growing up in a somewhat famous family and living with a criminal secret identity had taught him anything, it was how to escape press.

Within a few seconds, they had made it to the car. Oliver opened the door for Felicity and pushed her into it. He followed only a second later, sinking into the cool leather seats and closing the door behind them. Oliver was relieved they had just made it to the car without any incidence. He wasn’t sure he would have had the patience to deal with any crappy questions today. He was still hanging on by a thread, his personality pulled back to darker times after the long time he had just paced up and down in prison.

“Thank god,” he whispered to himself.

“Yeah, Thank God,” Felicity answered.

He was about to turn his head, a chuckle already rising in his throat. Before he got to move, Felicity was already sliding onto his lap, though. With one leg to each of his sides, she pressed her hips down onto his, framed his face with her hands and kissed him passionately. Oliver groaned, opening up to the touch of her tongue. His hands came to rest on her hips, digging into the naked skin where her skirt had ridden up her legs. He pulled her down onto him, wanting to feel her entire body against his, and Felicity answered to that by scratching her fingertips over his cheeks.

Oliver got lost in the moment, so he barely noticed that the limo started moving. He and Felicity just continued kissing, holding each other and touch each other. Their breathing was erratic, but neither of them was willing to break the kiss just yet. He wanted to keep kissing her, pouring all his love into the kiss and making good for the time he had missed kissing her.

“Just for the record,” Felicity whispered against his lips, “if the drive home was longer and we didn’t have so much to discuss, I’d get devour you right here.”

As soon as the last syllable had been spoken, Felicity bit into his bottom lip and tugged at it with her teeth. Oliver groaned in response, straightening up more to press his chest against hers. His arms tightened around her small body, holding her close against him. He could feel her racing heartbeat against his chest, feeling his own heart stumble a little until it was beating in synch with hers.

“For the record,” he whispered and kissed her once more quickly. “If the drive home was longer and we didn’t have so much to discuss, I’d want you to devour me right here.”

He brushed his lips against hers once more and Felicity stroked her fingers into his hair to deepen the kiss. She gently angled his head back and slid closer to him, so she could stroke her tongue into his mouth. The tip of her tongue brushed against the roof of his mouth before slowed the kiss down. With a heavy sigh, Oliver used the opportunity to kiss the corner of her lips and kissed a path over her cheek to her ear.

“Since things are how they are,” he whispered, “I suggest you update me on what is going on, and I will just continue kissing you.”

When Oliver caught her lobe between his lips, Felicity hummed, her fingers tightening to a fist in his hair. He took that encouragement and tickled her soft skin with the tip of his tongue. Felicity snuggled more against him, angling his head to the side to give him more room.

Slowly, Oliver let his lips travel down to her neck. He pulled down the turtleneck, taking a look at the bruises. They looked terrible, scaring and painful, a thought that made his stomach twist. As gently as he could, he brushed his lips against them, kissing them better.

“Do they hurt?” he asked.

“It’s okay,” Felicity whispered. “It got better.”

He knew it was the only answer he would get on this. Even if she was in pain, she wouldn’t tell him, so he just brushed his lips against her neck once more before moving them back to her ear.

“Talk,” Oliver whispered into her ear before continuing with his lobe.

“Okay,” Felicity replied with a sigh, obviously having trouble to keep her breathing under control and focus. “I’ll talk.”

Oliver’s lips found the soft skin under her ear, sucking there gently. Felicity scratched his scalp in response. Oliver wanted to continue just this way, but he could feel Felicity’s focus slipping and, admittedly, he wasn’t exactly focused either. He could feel the blood pooling between his legs slowly, but he knew they wouldn’t be able to stop if they continued, but they also wouldn’t be able to finish. Oliver kissed back down to her lips, stroking his tongue against hers one last time. When their lips parted, he automatically pulled himself being drawn back to her, so he brushed his lips against hers once more, chastely this time, before he put his hands to Felicity’s hips and make her sit in the leather next to him, both her legs resting on his thighs.

When his eyes found Felicity’s, he saw her pupils being dilated with lust. Her fingertips played with the hem of his shirt, every once in a while sneaking under the fabric to tickle his abdomen. Oliver caught her hand eventually, pressing it to his heart. He thought to himself that they’d continue this later though he knew that later would be a lot later because he doubted the kids would sleep in their own beds in the next days and they’d have their hands full all day.

“So, what happened?” Oliver asked. “How did you get me out? Liam said someone turned himself in, but-“

“His name is Lucas Barnes,” Felicity interrupted him. “You saved his daughter the night Emmy was born. She is his whole life because her mom died a few years ago. He has cancer now and only has a few weeks to live. He said he wants to give back for what you did, saying you saved him from living without his daughter, so he is going to save our kids from growing up without their dad.”

Oliver frowned slightly. “I am not sure how comfortable I am with this.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered, stroking her fingertips over his stubble. “I wasn’t exactly comfortable with it either, but it was our only chance and he really wanted to help. It was for selfish reasons mainly, but I couldn’t really deny a dying man his wish, you know?”

Felicity rested her chin on his shoulder and Oliver kissed her forehead, squeezing her fingers. He knew exactly what she meant.

“So, how did you convince the police to believe his story more than mine?”

“He had a good story to offer that worked with some main events that the media likes to point out,” Felicity replied, “and I helped making it work more with your story. Then I showed him the lair, we placed more evidence there to help his story and he turned himself in. It was all a little tricky, but it worked. He will tell what he knows and not talk about the things he doesn’t know. His admission and the evidence should be enough.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He felt sorry for the man who was using his last weeks to get into a legal process and take the blames for a lot of crimes he hadn’t committed. He knew how important it was to know that you did good things in your life and that you had used your life and not wasted it. If he had died on the Gambit, he knew he had wasted his life terribly.

“Where is Tommy?” Oliver asked eventually. He frowned at his own question, realizing this could lead to a lot of misunderstandings in the future. “I mean… Tommy Merlyn.”

“In our new lair.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Where did you find a new one so soon? Certainly not in the property sector.”

Felicity smiled. “Nope. Under your campaign office.”

“Sebastian Blood’s old hideout,” Oliver remembered.

Felicity nodded. “Yep. It’s not the best place yet, but it will be. Cisco and I have already talked about some plans. Bruce has a trustworthy building company at hand that will help us to set everything up, but we need to have the office cleared for that, at least to get everything inside that we need. The noise attenuation down there is quite good, so it shouldn’t be much of a problem to work down there while people are in the offices. Well, that is if you are still interested in your campaign.”

“I am,” Oliver replied. He put a hand to Felicity’s thigh and stroked her soft skin. “If that is okay with you.”

Felicity smiled softly. “You have my full support, no matter what you want to do. If you want to quit, I am here for you. If you want to continue, I will be by your side every step of the way.”

“I think in that case I’d like to go back. “Oliver smiled back at her and captured her lips in a gentle kiss. “Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Felicity replied.

He knew she couldn’t have slept much in the past days, and yet she used all her energy to tell him that she was still on his side and still took all the troubles his life decision would bring. There were no words to describe how much he loved her in this moment.

“How is Tommy?” he asked her eventually, knowing his declaration of love would have to wait until they had discussed the more urgent and not so obvious things. “Any change?”

Felicity shook his head. “We still have him sedated. It’s safest that way. Laurel reached Nyssa, though. She thinks that Malcolm used one of these magic waters to revive Tommy. Sometimes that leads to some form of brainwashing. She knows how to help it and will send one of the assassins to hand us a serum that should cure him. It will take a few days, though.”

Oliver nodded. “That’s good.”

“It’s all we could do so far,” Felicity replied. She shrugged her shoulders. “We will have to see how that goes.”

“We have a glimpse of hope and that is all that matters,” he told her. “We will take care of all of this. Just not tonight. Tonight, we are only going to spend time with our kids.”

“They can’t wait to see you again,” Felicity told him with an almost reverent smile. “They tried to convince me to take them with me. Millie leeched on to my leg and Emmy tried to hide in the limo.”

“I can’t wait to see them again either.”

When the limo turned into the driveway to the mansion, Oliver felt his heartbeat quickening. He had always thought if he returned to house he had grown up in, he wouldn’t have eyes for anything else. Since he had never imagined circumstances like these leading him back to this place, he had been terribly wrong.

As soon as the mansion came into his sight and he saw his kids playing in front of the house, he squeezed Felicity’s hand once more and quickly got out of the car, not even waiting until it had stopped. Immediately, Emmy, Tommy and Millie dropped the ball they had been playing with came running towards him. Emmy and Tommy were much faster than Millie, who seemed to have trouble not to stumble over her own feet. Oliver sank down on his knees and just spread his arms.

“Daddy!” Emmy and Tommy exclaimed again and again.

Once they had reached him, they flung their arms around him and Oliver wrapped his arms around their little bodies, crashing them to him. He pressed kisses to their heads again and again. Without much success, he tried to fight the tears that threatened to well in his eyes.

“Hey, Kiddos.”

Those two words alone were enough for him to feel at home. It didn’t matter that they weren’t in the house they lived in but a house he had lived in, well, what Felicity had made of it. He was with the people he loved and that was the only thing that mattered. He had his kids here and that was what made him feel home.

“Dada!”

Oliver opened his eyes to see Millie approaching him, looking at her hands that were dirty from falling. Not hesitating, he pushed Emmy onto his back, to her arms were wrapped around his neck from behind. Her legs tried to wrap around his waist as much as possible. Oliver didn’t care that he could barely breathe with her hold. He just wrapped his now free arm around Millie and kissed her forehead.

“Hi, Sweetheart,” he whispered to her.

“Dada,” Millie repeated and pushed her hand closer to his face.

“Here, daddy is going to blow on it,” Oliver said, gently took her hand and blew on the little scratch. “Better?”

Millie nodded and stepped closer to him, snuggling up to his chest. Oliver smiled and kissed her head, seeing William standing at the door with Raisa, Felicity and Addie. Oliver sighted, wishing all bruises could be healed as easily as Millie’s.

“Emmy, hold on tight.”

Oliver tightened his arms around Millie and Tommy as he straightened back up. He walked over to the others slowly, feeling his tension increase once more. He had tried to prepare himself for the talk with William, but he wasn’t sure there was any way to prepare oneself for that. It wasn’t going to be easy Oliver knew when William lowered his gaze to the floor.

“It’s good to see you again, Mr. Oliver,” Raisa said, a wide smile spread on her lips.

Oliver chuckled. She had given up on calling him Mr. Oliver for the most part, but old habits were hard to let go of. He leaned forward and kissed her cheek.

“It’s good to see you again. Thanks for holding the fort here.”

“Of course,” Raisa replied.

Oliver turned his attention to his youngest kid and kissed her temple. “Hi, Love. How are you doing?”

Addie released a low cry, rubbing her hands over her eyes. Felicity took her from Raisa and kissed her cheek, explaining with a chuckle, “Yeah, you are a little hungry. Let’s get you something to eat. Everyone who wants ice cream comes inside.”

“Me!” Emmy said, immediately jumping off Oliver’s back.

When Millie and Tommy tried to struggle out of his arms, he kissed both of their heads. He didn’t want to let go of them just yet, but he knew Felicity had suggested the ice cream for more reasons than just to celebrate, so Oliver lowered them to the floor safely. They followed Felicity and Raisa inside immediately, so it was Oliver and William left outside.

“Left for ice cream,” William said, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants and hunching his shoulders. “That’s hard.”

Oliver released a nervous chuckle, appreciating the try to lighten the mood. “I am used to it.”

“Now, that’s sad,” William replied.

Oliver grinned and shrugged his shoulders. “I am glad they get distracted so easily. It makes it easier. Besides, it gives us the room to talk. Felicity told me she talked to you about… about me being the Arrow.”

William seemed to be surprised that he addressed it so directly and Oliver couldn’t deny that he was a little surprised by this either. It felt good saying it out loud in front of his son, though. He hated secrets. He had kept them for way too long.

“She did,” William replied, “and she is a great spokeswoman. Really, if you had been taken in front of a judge, you should have hired her as a lawyer.”

Oliver smiled proudly. “She is… She is the best.”

“I… I had a lot of time to think,” William replied, “and… I… I am still a little angry that you kept this from me for so long, but I think I do understand why. At least Felicity told me it had to do with mom and not putting me in a situation where I had to lie. It’s just that… I read a lot about the Arrow and the Hood. They… they made mistakes, but… I think… I think it’s okay… that you are the Arrow. I mean… I still have a lot of questions-”

“You can ask me anything,” Oliver interrupted him immediately. “Whatever you want to know, I am going to tell you.”

“Not today,” William replied. “I… I think it wouldn’t be fair to hog you. I am sure my siblings wouldn’t be happy about that.”

Oliver smiled, proud how wonderful William was with his siblings. He always had been.

“We are going to talk soon,” Oliver promised, “as soon as things have calmed down and you are ready.”

“Okay,” William replied casually. “Cool.”

“Cool,” Oliver repeated his son’s answer.

Was that really it? A few sentences and all problems were solved, at least for now? If they way William looked more relaxed now was any indication, the answer seemed to be a yes.

“Thank you, William.”

William shrugged his shoulders. “You’re my dad after all.”

“I know from experience that we shouldn’t forgive our parents all mistakes.”

“Maybe,” William agreed, “but the limit hasn’t occurred here yet. Aside from some mistakes, you’re actually a quite good dad and… probably a good human.”

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered. “This means a lot coming from you.”

There was a moment of hesitation before Oliver pulled William into a short hug. He was pretty sure teenagers weren’t that happy about parental hugs. He hadn’t really liked it much either. As a dad, he loved to hug his kids, no matter how old they were.

“Should we go inside and check if your siblings left some ice cream for us?”

William nodded. “Sounds good.”

 

 

As Felicity stepped out of the en-suite bathroom and into the room that had once been Oliver’s she looked at the bed. The bedding on the left side was used, while the one on the right was still untouched. She went over to the left side where she had tried to sleep these last couple of nights even if she hadn’t had any success.

Felicity frowned slightly as she stared at the bed, unsure if she should just crawl in. Since Oliver had basically jumped out of the driving limo, they hadn’t had a single second alone. Hence, there had been no time to discuss how they were going to continue from here. They hadn’t talked about how she hadn’t come to him immediately after the Dragon Lady had blackmailed her. They had said they’d talk about it once things were solved and things were solved now. They hadn’t been really solved when they had shared a moment in the limo. What had happened there, the desperate kisses and clinging onto each other, didn’t matter. Oliver might still be angry and need his room.

With a sad sigh, Felicity gathered her bedding. She knew if things were the other way around, she might want her room and that would mean that Oliver would have to sleep on the couch. Well, he could sleep in one of the guest rooms, but he refused to so. He always said, sleeping on the couch felt more temporary than moving into one of the guest rooms did. Felicity had always smiled at that because she hadn’t understood it. Now, she did.

Felicity was just at the door when she ran into Oliver. He frowned, looking down on her blanket and pillow.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh, I thought-“ Felicity stopped shortly. “I thought it was- you know, we haven’t talked about- I mean I didn’t come to you when the Dragon Lady- we said we would talk about it, but- so I figured-“

“Okay, there was no real sentence in there, but I understand what you are trying to say and this” – he nodded down to her bedding – “goes back to our bed.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. “Are you sure?”

“Very,” Oliver replied, putting his hands to her shoulders, “because this entire week that I didn’t sleep for more than three minutes, my favorite thought was sliding back into bed with you.”

“Yeah, I know how that feels,” Felicity stated, “though the sleeping pills I got for the last night helped a little.”

She continued looking at him for a moment before she turned around and put her bedding back to her side of the bed. She felt all the exhaustion of the past days pressing down on her all of a sudden. It was like the wave buried her in cold and left her just tired. With a deep sigh, Felicity dropped to the bed and stared at the ceiling.

“I am sorry I didn’t come to you immediately,” Felicity whispered eventually. “I thought… I don’t know what I thought.”

Oliver lay down on the bed too, the side of his face snuggled up to hers upside down. Felicity smiled, reaching out her fingers to stroke them through his stubble. When her forefingers grazed the corner of his mouth, she could feel the smile on his lips.

“I know what you were thinking,” Oliver told her after a moment of silence. “You were thinking that us separating was a better way for me and for our kids. That way I could still see them. I wouldn’t end up in jail. I could spend days with the kids, and they could see me whenever they wanted. You also knew I’d never agree to something like that, so you did the only thing you felt you could do protect me and the kids. You lied.”

Felicity felt a tear escaping the corner of her eye. “The way you say it almost makes it sound like I had no choice. We both know that’s not true.”

“Rationally, you had more choices. Emotionally, probably not so much,” Oliver replied. He was quiet for a moment before he released a sigh. “Look, Felicity, it would be a lie to say I wasn’t disappointed that you didn’t come to me immediately. I wished you hadn’t considered giving into that blackmail. The truth is also that it would be hypocritical of me to say I didn’t understand what you have been going through. Look at what I did. As soon as you told me, I left to turn myself in though you asked me not to. I didn’t listen to you either and chose the way I felt I could protect you the best. We love each other so much, we want to protect each other no matter the cost and that drives us to do things we always said we wouldn’t do.”

Felicity turned her head to look at Oliver and he did the same.

“Do you think that’s a bad thing?”

Oliver smiled quietly and shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, but it also doesn’t matter because, whether it’s right or not, it’s who we are, so we will have to deal with it.”

Felicity let Oliver’s words settle in, letting them fill her chest and her heart. Eventually, they moved at the same time. Their lips drew towards each other, meeting in a gentle kiss. It wasn’t exactly easy to kiss upside down, no matter what TV tried to make people believe, but Felicity didn’t mind. She felt the honesty and importance of this moment that things were talked out and no more unspoken words between them. It was perfect, no matter how messy their kiss was.

“I hear footsteps,” Oliver whispered against her lips way too soon. “We will get visitors soon.”

“I suspected the kids would come here.”

“I don’t mind,” Oliver whispered, brushing his lips against hers once more. “I am just happy I am back with my family.”

Felicity smiled. “So am I.”


	266. New chances

“Mommy, everyone is staring at us.”

“I know.”

Felicity stroked her fingers through Emmy’s blond curls for a moment, smiling at her comfortingly. After a moment, she leaned over and kissed her daughter’s temple, shooting a brief look to the two dozen of reporters Alex had invited for a press conference about what had happened last week. They were indeed looking in their direction, whispering to one another and taking photos of them.

She shot a nervous glance at her watch and released a low sigh. Alex had told them that the best they could do was to present themselves as a unite during the press conference. The whole family, including Felicity and the kids as well as Thea and Roy, just as Donna and Quentin, should come to support Oliver. Though they had hesitated about taking the kids at first, they had agreed eventually. The Diggles and Laurel had come to support them too, so basically everyone was there. Only William was missing since his mother had ordered him back home after he had spent the entirety of the last week with them. Anyway, after Felicity and the kids had left Oliver’s office to take their seats, he had been supposed to step out only a minute later. Now three minutes had passed, and Felicity could feel the reporters getting impatient.

“Daddy is going to step out any second,” Felicity whispered to Emmy, putting a hand to her daughter’s head and pulling it closer until it rested against her upper arm. “Just don’t look there.”

Emmy sighed, snuggling closer to Felicity. She kept her hand on Emmy’s face, hiding it from the reporters actually. With her other hand she turned the page of the picture book she had brought for Millie, who was sitting on her lap. While Millie was pointing at the pictures and Emmy prompted her the words Millie was missing, Felicity looked back over her shoulder. Tommy was sitting on a chair between Donna and Quentin, holding one hand of each of his grandparents. Addie lying in her stroller that Laurel was pushing back and forth slowly.

“There’s daddy,” Emmy whispered excitedly, straightening up.

Felicity turned her gaze to Oliver’s office, seeing him stepping out. His eyes locked on hers immediately and he mouthed a soundless “Sorry”. Felicity only smiled and shook her head, telling him it was all okay. She knew talking to the press still wasn’t easy for him, no matter how good he had gotten at it, and this press conference was going to be one of the harder ones. They could probably both make it out from the way the reporters already asked all the questions, the flashlights of their cameras hailing down on them.

Despite all of it, Oliver stepped behind the lectern with straightened shoulders and his head held up high. His eyes looked in her direction briefly, and Felicity smiled proudly, wordlessly giving him all the encouragement he needed. Straightening his shoulders once more, Oliver lifted his hand, effectively getting the reporters to calm down until the office was all silent.

“Thank you all for coming,” Oliver said calmly. “I know there were a lot of rumors last week, but I am here to state once and for all that I am not the Arrow.”

Of course that statement got the reporters to ask their questions once more. It was a jumble of voices, no questions understandable. There had been several statements from the police and the district attorney’s office, all exonerating Oliver. Yet, the media seemed to want the answers from Oliver directly. Admittedly, with him running for mayor, no matter what he’d say, it would probably make a good story.

When the questions didn’t end, the volume in the room only increasing, Oliver said with a smile on his lips, “I cannot answer any of your questions if you ask them all at the same time.”

Felicity smiled proudly. He was doing so great. No matter how hard this all was, he managed to stay in control and behave lightly. There would have been times that all of this would have pulled him back into old behavior. The week without his family had made him brood a lot and get him to a point where he was so short on temper that he has snapped at her. She knew how hard it had been on him. She would have known it even if Oliver hadn’t told her all about it in the last days since he had been back. He had told her about it nonetheless, opening up about all the thoughts that had gone through his mind while he had been in jail, no matter how dark they had been.

“Thank you,” Oliver said once all the questions had stopped. “Now, if I was running for mayor and save the city at night as a vigilante that might make me a hero for some and probably a hypocrite for others. Either way, I am none of this, at least not regarding this issue. All I am is a man who wants to help this city in the knowledge of what the good, but mainly the bad my parents have done to this place and the people who live here.”

“What does he mean, Mommy?” Emmy asked, whispering the words to her mother. “What did Grandma Moira and Grandpa Robert do?”

“I am going to tell you when you are a little older,” Felicity promised. “It’s a complicated story.”

Emmy seemed to be about to say something more, but Felicity but her finger onto her lips, telling her to be quiet.

“Lucas Barnes tried his best to protect this city for the past years,” Oliver continued. “He took the sorrow that happened to his own family and turned it into something good. People might disagree with his methods, but he did try something good. The least I could do was to comply with his last wish and give him the time to enjoy his daughter’s wedding and the freedom to say goodbye to his loved ones. I did that, feeling it was the right thing to do. That being said, I am not the Arrow. I am just a normal man.”

Normal was probably the last word she’d ever use to describe Oliver, even if he wasn’t the Arrow. She knew him better than anyone else, though. For others, he might at least seem somewhat normal.

“Now, if you have any questions, I will try to answer them,” Oliver said.

Immediately, every single reporter in that room lifted their hands, eager to ask any questions. Oliver nodded to one of them.

“Mr. Queen, you have been hesitant to take a stand on the vigilantism in Starling City so far,” the reporter stated. “With your actions of the past week, it seems you have overcome your worry about frightening hoped-for voters away. Do you have a clearer answer on where you stand now?”

“My hesitance to take a stand had nothing to do with any voters. I am who I am, and I stand for what I stand for,” he explained. “I am not going to pretend being someone I am not to get more people to vote me. That wouldn’t be honest to me, and it wouldn’t be honest to voters. That being said, it is hard to decide where I stand with this. I see why people are worried about the vigilantes. I do think that they could be a useful tool to make this city shine again if it’s handled right. There are a lot of factors that need to be considered, though. That is why all I can say is that I can’t decide how I think about them unless we haven’t tried different ways. So far, it’s mostly been the city chasing or ignoring them. If I get the chance and if it’s possible, I would like a different approach and try to work with them. These people seem to care about this city deeply and that is what should matter. As long as there are still people fighting to this city, it can’t be too far gone.”

He gestured for the next reporter to speak.

“Mr. Queen, how did you know Lucas Barnes?”

“I didn’t,” Oliver replied honestly. “He came to me one day and confronted me with his sister’s death during the Undertaking. Then he told me about what he has been doing and that, because of my parents’ actions, I owed him one.”

“And you simply agreed?” the reporter asked.

“I didn’t do anything simply,” Oliver said with firm voice. “I know I cannot right my parents’ wrongs. I can stand for what I believe in, though. I do believe in family, and I do believe that we should all get the chance to say goodbye to the people we love when the time comes. My father didn’t get that. My mother didn’t get that. My best friend Tommy didn’t get that. The least I could do was making sure Mr. Barnes would get that.”

Thea leaned forward from where she was sitting behind Felicity and whispered into her ear, “Did you go through those questions with him? He is handling this really well. I thought they would rip him apart.”

Felicity just smiled. Oliver was really good at this. She was actually surprised how quickly he had decided to wade back into his candidacy. He had called Alex the day after he had been released from jail and hadn’t hesitated to make plan. After her first and only visit at Iron Heights, Felicity had thought it would take longer for him to shake off the impression of his time away.

While Oliver was answering some more questions, Millie took the book from Felicity’s hand, closed it and dropped it to the floor. Felicity shot her a brief look, expecting Millie to squeal in delight, but she actually frowned. Usually Millie, just like Addie, loved to test her limits. She seemed to be just dissatisfied about sitting there today, though. Felicity tightened her arm and bend forward to pick up the book from the floor. Millie managed to escape her lap nonetheless, but Felicity kept holding onto her hand.

“Go dada,” Millie said, turning around to Felicity, but pointing at Oliver.

Felicity shook her head. “Not now. Later, okay?”

“No,” Millie replied. “Go dada.”

Felicity tugged at Millie’s hand, making her step back closer to her. She kissed her daughter’s temple and whispered, “Daddy needs to talk to the press for a moment, but as soon as he’s ready-“

“No, go dada,” Millie interrupted her.

She tried to slap Felicity’s hands away from her waist. When it didn’t work, she released a low cry. Felicity tried to lift her back into her lap, but she didn’t dare to. She could see that Millie was right at the verge of throwing a temper tantrum. She usually did so, but since last week she was specifically short on patience.

“Millie, we-“

When Millie released another cry, Felicity considered taking her outside, so she could calm down. Before she could figure out if it was the right thing to do, Millie managed to sneak out of her touch and went right towards Oliver. Felicity considered just going after her and fetch her again, but she decided on dropping her face into her hand instead.

It only lasted a moment, though. Soon, she bit down on her bottom lip and looked at the scene, though, unable to look away. Millie was just reaching Oliver and tugging at his jeans to raise his attention.

“…definitely hard time and I couldn’t have done it without my family,” Oliver continued his answer about what a week in jail had done to him and whether or not it had reminded him of his youth. He didn’t even stop when he bent down and lifted Millie into his arms, holding her against his chest and putting a hand to the back of her head to keep her turned away from the cameras. “I was never in jail for this long and I have no intentions of going back there ever again.”

The next reporter was asking her question, asking about how his own experience in jail had an influence on the mostly criticized conditions in Iron Heights as well as his plans on supporting the rehabilitation of former inmates. Millie was turning in his arms, no matter how much Oliver tried to keep her back turned to the cameras. The flashlights were hailing down on them. Oliver looked slightly uncomfortable which Felicity could understand. She wasn’t happy about Millie being in the direct spotlight, either. Since she knew that all her kids had inherited the Queens’ mule, she also knew there was nothing that could be done to stop Millie. She was indeed smiling into the camera happily.

“I cannot say that I realized any unfair or inhuman conditions during my time in Iron Heights, but I have to admit that it wasn’t my primary focus and with who I am, I do think that I might have gotten some-“

“Dada,” Millie interrupted her dad in whisper, and the way she played with her hands gave away how flustered she was with all the attention all of a sudden.

“What’s wrong?” Oliver asked. Millie pointed at the reporters before she looked back at Oliver, who perked up his eyebrows. “Yeah, we have some guests.”

Millie hesitated for a moment before she waved at them, making a murmur go through the crowd. At the same times, more photos were taken, and Millie smiled happily. She leaned forward, putting her hands on the lectern.

“Hi,” she said.

Oliver seemed to be distracted by his daughter’s suddenly found desire to be in the spotlight. He was smiling at her, watching at her in amazement. He and Felicity had talked a lot about who Millie was alike to. Emmy was more like Felicity, but with some characteristics of Oliver. Tommy was more like Oliver, but with some characteristics of his mother. In this moment, Millie kind of reminded Felicity of Thea. She couldn’t even say why exactly.

“What else can you say?” one of the reporters in the front line asked.

Felicity could already see Oliver protesting that Millie was not going to answer any questions, but the toddler was quicker. She waved her hands, happily replying, “Bye-bye.”

Everyone in the room, Oliver and Felicity included, laughed. It was the first time Millie was really relieved since the incident with the reporter had happened. It was good to see that she was overcoming her clinginess and shyness and going back to her usual friendly and open self. It encouraged Felicity’s decision to suggest moving back home by the end of the week.

Eventually, Oliver whispered something into Millie’s ear. She hesitated for a moment, but nodded eventually. Oliver traced the dummy chain that was attached to her pullover and grabbed the pacifier at the end. She held it in front of her lips and Millie took it in. She made herself comfortable against Oliver’s chest and rested her head on his shoulder, away from the cameras.

“I’m sorry for the interruption,” Oliver said. “The next question.”

One reporter got up and asked, “Mr. Queen, so far, your entire campaign has revolved around how your family is always your priority and how that makes you the best chance for this city as you would only want what is best for the city you live in. Yet, you chose to turn yourself in and risked spending the rest of your life in prison for a stranger. How do you think that matches together?”

“My campaign actually revolves a lot about people needing to be united to achieve something in this city,” Oliver replied without hesitation. “For me, personally, the strongest union is my family. I know that we stand together and are there for each other. A bond like that can help you to achieve incredible things. I do not limit unions just to my family, though. I think we need to all stick together to achieve things, family or not. I stood up for Lucas Barnes, just like he tried to stand up for the people who were betrayed, suppressed or hurt in this city because that is what you do for a family, and a family is what we should see in each other.”

Oliver’s eyes locked with Felicity’s, and she smiled proudly. This man was incredible, and he never seemed to cease surprising her.

 

 

As soon as the door was closed behind the reporters, Oliver released a deep sigh and closed his eyes for a moment. He had to admit that the press conference had gone a lot better than she had thought it would. Yet, it had been exhausting, and he was glad it was over. He had been prepared for most questions and handled the ones he hadn’t been prepared for okay he guessed.

After the official part had been over, Oliver had wanted to go down to the new lair and check on Tommy immediately. He knew that the serum Nyssa had planned to send should have arrived today which meant that, in less than twenty-four hours, they’d hopefully know how much of the Tommy Oliver had known was still in there. Since Alex had convinced him to take some time and talk to the reporters, though, going down there had had to wait until now.

Oliver turned around, about to hold out for Felicity. The last time he had seen her, she had handed the kids over to Raisa, so she could take them home. As soon as he had turned around, he saw Felicity stepping right in front of him, a smile on her lips that made his stomach flutter and lowered his eyes to his feet. It was weird how he still felt like a shy schoolboy around her at times. Not that he knew what a shy schoolboy he felt like since he had never been shy during his school years.

“You did really great today,” Felicity told him. She lifted her hand to the knot of his tie, loosening it. Then she opened the two topmost buttons of his shirt. “So, it’s almost time to relax.”

Oliver felt his fingers twitch at that. He knew that she considered everything that didn’t involve cameras or reporters as a form of relaxation and, admittedly, he had to agree to some extent. It didn’t change that his mind immediately jumped to having sex. There had been no time to reconcile in that way yet. Anyway, they needed to be patient a little longer.

“I want to go downstairs to see Tommy first, but-“

“Well, I think you have another challenge to accept before that,” Felicity said. She turned her head back over her shoulder to his office briefly. “My mom wants to talk to you.”

Oliver felt his stomach drop. He knew Donna hadn’t reacted too well to the news of him being the Arrow. He knew if one of his kids would tell him that they were married to someone he considered a serial killer, he would have trouble with that too. He had thought a lot about what to say to Donna and still wasn’t sure what was the right thing. He twisted his wedding band around his finger nervously.

“Hey,” Felicity whispered, entwining her fingers with his. “No matter what she will say, I love you and that is all that matters.”

Oliver smiled and kissed her lips shortly, hugging Felicity close. He pressed his nose to the top of her head and breathed her in, closing his eyes for a moment.

“I love you too,” he whispered.

When they released each other from the hug, Felicity smiled at him encouragingly. “Should I come with you?”

Oliver looked at where Donna was sitting on the couch in his office, playing with her hands. He looked back at Felicity, shaking his head. “No, I will do this alone. Just go downstairs already.”

Felicity nodded in agreement. She pecked his lips once more before she turned around and went to his office, only releasing Oliver’s hand after squeezing it once more. Oliver waited until the elevator doors had closed behind her. Only then, he straightened his shoulders and took in a deep breath, readying himself for having this conversation with his mother-in-law.

“Hi, Oliver,” she said as soon as he stepped into his office, pushing her hands between her legs to keep them from moving too much.

“Hey,” Oliver replied.

He was unsure what to do and figured the best he could do was give Donna some room, so he sat down on the other couch. Resting his elbows on his knees, he leaned forward and looked at his mother-in-law. Donna was scrutinizing him almost like she was looking for anything that she missed over all the years, something that would have given away the truth about him. Oliver couldn’t deny that he was hurt about it.

“I know you-“

Donna lifted her hands in front of her defensively, squeezing her eyes shut. Oliver fell silent immediately, holding his breath. There was a long moment of silence that neither of them said a word. Oliver continued to look at Donna, feeling his nervousness increasing. If she couldn’t listen to what he had to say and couldn’t look at him, how was she supposed to trust him with her only child?

“I had a lot of time to think about all of this,” Donna said slowly, only now opening her eyes, “and I still can’t wrap my head around this. How can the man who makes my grandchildren dinner every evening and puts them to bed at night, the man my daughter, who is scared of abandonment and doesn’t trust easily, chose to get married to and trust her heart with be the same man that… that… did all of these things?”

Oliver felt a thick lump forming in his throat, making it almost unable to talk. Donna wasn’t happy about these new developments, and he couldn’t even hold it against her. He had doubted that he was a good man, one who deserved the love of a woman like Felicity, too. He had fought with those doubts for years.

“I-“

Again, Donna just lifted her hand to make him fall silent. Again, he just shut up.

“I-“ Donna stopped and took in a deep breath. “Felicity told me that you are still the same man that I know, the man I was so proud has become my son-in-law.”

“I am,” Oliver whispered.

Donna looked at him for a long moment before she said, “I am not sure if I can believe you.”

Oliver nodded slowly, lowering his eyes. “I know, and I am sorry.”

“Now, while I can’t trust you for as long as I haven’t convinced myself of who you really are,” Donna added after a moment, “I do trust my daughter’s judgement. If Felicity says that you can be trusted, I will trust that. Until I haven’t assured myself that you are the man I got to know, I doubt we can continue the way we got along in the last years, though.”

“Which means?” Oliver asked.

Donna shook her shoulders. “I don’t know. All I know is that I need time to think about all of this and get used to the thought of who you are.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “Okay.”

Donna pursed her lips for a moment before she got up. Oliver got up too, keeping his distance, though. They stood in front of each other indecisively for a moment, neither of them sure what to do. Eventually, Donna stepped forward and hugged him briefly. His hand had barely come to rest on her back when she already stepped out of the hug and went to the door.

Oliver lowered his eyes to his feet. He hadn’t known how this conversation was going to go. From what Felicity had told him, Donna had reacted hurt to the truth, but she had let herself calm down relatively easily. He guessed that the troubles his arrest had brought had gotten her to look past her feelings and do what had needed to be done instead. He couldn’t deny that he was disappointed and incredibly sad about the wrench between him and Donna, but he had gotten a chance and that was all that mattered.

“Oliver?”

Oliver looked up, seeing Donna leaning in the door and look at him. “Yes?”

“When I came here today, I was ninety percent sure I would ask you to leave,” Donna admitted. “I thought it was better for Felicity and the kids if you weren’t a part of their lives any longer. I know what it is like to be with someone who has higher goals than family or a simple career. With what you said during your interview and everything, I am at eighty-twenty right now. Maybe one day it will be even or in favor of you staying.”

Oliver nodded slowly before he replied, “I love you and I respect you. It’s why your opinion means a lot to me, but I would have disappointed you if you had asked me to leave them. I love Felicity, and I love my kids. There is nothing that would ever make me give up on them. All of this happened because someone tried to blackmail Felicity into leaving me, and she didn’t agree. If Felicity would ever ask me to let her go, honestly ask me out of her own will, I would let her go. If I saw any way to save what we have, I’d use that way, though. No matter what.”

Donna looked at him for another moment. She cocked her head. “Maybe it’s seventy-thirty now.”

She waved her hand awkwardly before she turned around and left. Oliver sucked in a deep breath and rubbed his hands over his face. He would do whatever he could to get Donna’s trust back. She was the only real grandparents his kids had. She had been like a mother to him. He needed her in his life, and he’d do everything to convince her that he was worth it.

Once he heard the door falling shut, Oliver quickly went to it and locked it behind Donna. He then stepped to the wooden panels in his office, pushed the button and stepped into the elevator. He had been at the new lair once since he had gotten out of jail, but it had been a short visit. The media had been following him and kept an eye on him. He hadn’t been able to disappear for too long.

When the elevator stopped in the basement and the doors opened, he stepped outside. The lair still wasn’t set up for their needs. Felicity had managed to take care of the basic technical requirements, but the lair was basically missing everything yet. It was something they would have to take care of soon. They just needed to find a way to clear the offices upstairs for a while to get the basic building materials they would need downstairs.

As he stepped closer to the source of light further in the back of the lair, he saw John, Laurel and Felicity standing around the med table that Tommy was still lying on. Since they had caught and sedated him, they had never left Tommy alone. Someone had always been by his side. Laurel, John and Roy had mainly taken the task, but Lyla had helped too if necessary.

“How did things with my mom go?” Felicity asked as Oliver approached them.

“Don’t ask,” Oliver replied, shooting her a look to make her know that he’d tell her all about it later, and Felicity nodded in response. “How are things with Tommy going?”

“Nyssa sent us the serum,” Laurel replied. “We just injected him and turned down the soporific. Nyssa said it might take one or two days for him to wake up. The serum is going to keep him asleep.”

Oliver nodded slowly, looking at his unconscious friend. He wanted to be there when he woke up. Despite not being able to tell him the truth, Tommy had helped him a lot during his first time back in Starling. He wanted to do the same for him. He wanted to be there for his friend, letting him know he was not alone.

“I am going to take the next shift on watching him,” he said. Oliver quickly looked at Felicity. “Do you think that’s okay for the kids?”

She smiled encouragingly. “Sure. I will get them distracted.”

Oliver relieved a breath of relief. “Good. You should all go home. The last week was stressful, and it’s going to be more stressful in the next time.”

Laurel bent down and kissed Tommy’s forehead, while Felicity put her arms around Oliver’s waist and rested her chin on his shoulder. Oliver turned his head to look at her. He frowned slightly at the expression on her face.

“Should I stay with you?” she asked.

Oliver shook his head. “You should go home to the kids. I am getting along, and I will call you if anything is going on.”

“Promise me?”

Oliver smiled, lifting a hand to her face and stroking his thumb over the corner of her mouth. Still smiling, he said, “I promise.”

He sealed his promise with a kiss to her lips. It was a chaste kiss, respective of the people around them. He released her sooner than he wanted, nuzzling his nose with her. Felicity looked at him closely once more, making sure that he really meant it. Only when he nodded, did she peck his lips once more and leave with the others. Oliver looked after them, waiting until the elevator doors closed behind them. Only then did he pull a chair closer to Tommy’s side.

The waiting began.


	267. A stolen decade

The waiting ended at exactly five past two pm the next day. Oliver had just reached the northern end of the lair during his twentieth walking of their new hideout when Tommy released somewhat of a mixture of a groan and a gasp. He turned around immediately and hurried to where Tommy was lying on the med table. His face was screwed up in pain or discomfort at least.

“Tommy?” he asked loudly. “Tommy, can you hear me?”

“Ollie, please, not so loud,” Tommy replied, not yet opening his eyes. “I have the worst hangover of my life.”

Oliver had trouble containing his emotions. He felt his throat tightening as tears threatened to well in his eyes. He still couldn’t believe that this was really happening, and he was indeed talking to the man who used to be his best friend when they were children or teens. They had been through so much, and Oliver had always regretted that he would never get a chance to make thing right with Tommy. Maybe now he got this chance after all. Ten years late, but better late than never.

Oliver quickly pulled his phone from his pants and texted Felicity.

**OQ:** Tommy is awake.

He pushed the phone back into his pants and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He looked at Tommy, who had lifted his hands to his face and rubbed them over it.

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked, unsure how to approach asking him what he remembered.

“I have a terrible headache,” Tommy replied. Eventually, he lowered his hands from his face and opened his eyes. He looked around shortly, a frown building on his forehead. “Where the hell am I?”

Oliver pursed his lips for a moment. “What is the last thing you remember?”

Tommy sat up. He seemed to feel dizzy. At least his facial expression changed in a way that looked like he was about to throw up any second. Oliver bent down and handed his friend a bottle of water. Tommy hesitated before it opened it and took a few gulps, his eyes never leaving Oliver’s face as he did so. Oliver couldn’t say if it was wariness or anger in Tommy’s eyes. When he eventually lowered the bottle and closed it, Tommy took in a deep breath that he released with a low sigh. His shoulders slumped, his facial expression growing softer.

“I don’t know,” he replied after a moment, lifting a hand to the back of his neck to massage the probably tight muscles there. “I… We…”

Tommy sighed and closed his eyes. Oliver pressed his lips together and rolled them into his mouth, giving Tommy the time he needed to remember anything. When he suddenly looked up at Oliver, his eyes locking onto his, Oliver knew he had remembered one of the many things that had caused trouble between them before Tommy had died.

“I saw you with Laurel.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He did consider responding to that first, but he figured it was better to take one step at a time. The most important thing right now was to gently inform Tommy that it had been more than ten years since that. He could try to repair their friendship after that.”

“Anything-“

“Wait,” Tommy suddenly said, frowning. “There was this… this earthquake. My dad was responsible for that and Laurel… Laurel was in the Glades. I- Is Laurel okay? Is she safe?”

Oliver nodded quickly. “Laurel is fine. You saved her.”

“I- I what?”

“You came to her workplace. She was caught under a giant piece of concrete or something. You helped her out, but got caught under it yourself,” Oliver said slowly, feeling it was best to skip the little detail about the iron bar that had been stuck in his body. “Do you remember?”

Tommy frowned, looking away for a moment. Oliver could have pinpointed the second Tommy did remember as his eyes became wide. He seemed confused in one moment, shocked in the next, then confused again. His eyes took in his hands, looking at them with an expression of blank horror that Oliver noticed from the way he had looked at his own hands when he had killed that man who had attacked Slade, Shado and him on the island. Oliver wondered if Tommy remembered choking Felicity and that was why he was staring at his hands like that.

“I remember that I was about to die,” Tommy whispered, lifting his eyes to Oliver again and lowering his hands to his thighs. “You were there. You told me you didn’t kill my dad.”

“I hadn’t,” Oliver replied, “but later on.”

“My dad told me. He said there were waters of resurrections that he used to live again. He used them on me, too.” Tommy nodded slowly, his eyes filling with horror once more. “I… I have done things… everything is blurred… Ollie, what happened?”

Oliver sat down on the med table next to Tommy. Against his former beliefs, he doubted there was a gentle was to tell the truth. How did you gently tell someone that you father had brainwashed you to use you for your own agenda that might have even turned you into a killer? He remembered how he had had to tell Thea who that she had killed Sara. It had been devastating for both of them, and this talk wasn’t going to be any easier.

“After you… died,” Oliver started slowly, I killed your father. At least I thought I did. He returned a year later and convinced Thea to come with him, so he could train her.”

“Like he trained me?” Tommy asked, shooting another short look at his hands.

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“Why?” Tommy asked immediately. “Why would he do that? Why Thea? She’s basically a child and-“

“She is his daughter,” Oliver told him. “Your father and my mother had an affair, and Thea is their daughter.”

Tommy looked at him in disbelief. “What?”

Oliver nodded slowly. “It’s getting… there is still a lot more to come.”

Tommy hesitated for a moment and Oliver gave him a moment to decide if he wanted to hear anything more of this. He felt like this was already a lot to take in and it barely covered the first of the many years Tommy had missed. Oliver felt Tommy needed to know the whole story to make sense of all of this, though. Eventually, Tommy nodded, though.

“Malcolm used a drug to make Thea do whatever he wanted,” Oliver explained, “and he made her kill Sara.”

Tommy frowned. “Sara died on the Gambit.”

“No, she didn’t,” Oliver replied. He looked to the floor guiltily. “I made everyone believe she did because I felt it was easier. It’s not true, though. She survived, and we saw each other again on the island. She got lost there, and I really thought she had died, but… she hadn’t.”

“But my dad made Thea kill her?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes.”

“Oh my God,” Tommy whispered.

He got up from the med table, starting to walk up and down hurried with his hands held behind it back. It was Oliver recognized from Ra’s al Ghul. He wouldn’t be surprised it Malcolm had taken Tommy to Nanda Parbat and snatched some assassins from their leader to help him train his son. Maybe he had just trained him himself all the time. There had been no hint of where Malcolm had been all these years after all.

“When did all this happen?” Tommy asked eventually.

“Nine years ago,” Oliver replied.

Tommy’s eyes widened. “Nine years ago? How long was I away?”

“A little longer than ten years,” Oliver whispered.

Oliver had never seen his friend as broken as in this moment. All the emotions that had been on his face before – confusion, anger and horror – faded away. There was only the expression of utter sadness and brokenness left. Oliver knew exactly how Tommy felt. He himself had lost five years of his life, but he had known about it at least. He could have gone back at any point if he had been ready. For Tommy it was different, so maybe Oliver didn’t how his friend felt after all.

“My dad stole an entire decade from me?” Tommy asked.

“Yes.”

Tommy walked up and down, tearing his hair out. He shook his head again and again, mumbling to himself, “This all can’t be true. It can’t be… Thea being my sister, my dad- our dad trying to turn both of us into killers, taking a whole decade from me and-“

“I know,” Oliver whispered calmingly. He straightened up and held his hands out in front of himself, gesturing for Tommy to stop. “I know this is all a lot and you will need a lot of time to figure things out, but you are not alone in this. You have friends like me and we are going to-“

“All my friends think I am dead,” Tommy replied. “I am officially dead. How do you plan on fixing that?”

“I know someone really smart who can help with this,” Oliver replied. “We are going to find a way for you to be resurrected officially. You can start a new life. You have Thea, Laurel and me, and our friends and families-“

“You got married.”

Oliver stopped. “What?”

Tommy put his hands to his hips and nodded towards the ring on his left hand. Oliver lifted his hand. His thumb played with his wedding band, swirling it around his ring finger.

“Yes,” Oliver replied. “I did.”

Tommy nodded slowly. It took a moment before he lowered his eyes to the floor and released a long sigh. He nodded to himself again before he looked at Oliver again, shaking his head this time.

“Everything – our fights before that earthquake about Laurel and about you being the Hood – just everything… it feels so meaningless compared to this,” Tommy said quietly. “I know that you and I have a lot to discuss. We have a lot to make good with each other and probably have to catch up on even more. Fact is that I have no idea where to go to or what to do now and you have been my oldest friend and it seems we are sharing a baby sister now, so… I would like to put our past behind and try to… be friends again? Because I don’t know what I’d do without a friend now.”

Oliver smiled in relief, feeling a little knot that had been in his chest since he and Tommy had talked in the hospital hallway in front of Malcolm’s room all those years ago untying. It was like the first time in over ten years he could really actually breathe again in a way he had never been able to breathe before. He had been at peace for the last years as he had started to process everything that had happened to him and to the people around him. Knowing how much he had disappointed his friend had always been a thought in the back of his mind that had pulled him down, though.

“I am really glad that you think that way,” Oliver replied and smiled. “This will be a lot of work and it will all take time, but we will talk about things and-“

There was a noise in the back of the lair and Oliver perked up his eyebrows when he saw Laurel, Felicity and Thea coming in with the kids. Laurel was pushing Addie’s stroller while Felicity was carrying Millie, who seemed to be dissatisfied about not being able to work. Thea was holding Emmy and Tommy on her hands, but they let go of her as soon as they saw their dad.

“Daddy!” they both exclaimed, coming running towards him.

Oliver hugged both of them close, stroking his fingers over their heads. For the kids, normality was slowly settling back in. Still, they weren’t exactly comfortable with either of their parents being away for too long.

“Daddy?” Tommy asked.

Oliver nodded. “I have five children.”

“Five?” Tommy asked.

Again, Oliver nodded. “These four and a teenage son.”

“Teenage?”

“Do you remember Samantha Clayton?”

“I thought she lost the child.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “She lied. She didn’t want her son anywhere near my mother after she asked her to pretend she lost the child.”

Tommy shook his head, releasing a sad chuckle. “We really don’t have the best parents.”

“All I can say in favor of mine is that they always wanted what was best for me,” Oliver whispered. “I don’t know about your dad.”

“He definitely didn’t,” Tommy replied with a snort.

Oliver looked at the others. Felicity and Laurel were going over to the small work station with Addie and Millie. They both looked into Oliver’s and Tommy’s direction every once in a while, but they didn’t come closer. Thea seemed to be undecided. She wrapped her jacket closer around herself, almost like she was hiding her baby bump and stayed in the middle of the room.

“So, those two are yours too?” Tommy asked, looking back between Emmy and Tommy.

Oliver nodded. “Emmeline Harper and Thomas Robert.”

“Thomas?” Tommy asked.

“After the guy who used to be my best friend,” Oliver replied with a smile. He looked at Tommy’s face, seeing his face filling with love at that. Oliver tickled Emmy’s neck. “Can you say hi to Tommy?”

Emmy looked shy for a moment which didn’t happen often. Her hand gripped Oliver’s tightly as she looked at Tommy. She knew him from photos, but, of course, she had never met him personally. Tommy crouched down, leveling his eyes with Emmy’s. Smiling, he reached out his hand for her, making Oliver wonder when he had become so good with kids.

“Hi, Emmeline,” he said.

Emmy looked at Oliver for a moment, asking for his permission. Only when he nodded, she looked back at Tommy and put her hand into his.

“Hello.”

“Hi,” Tommy said once more. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

When Emmy didn’t reply, Oliver tugged at her earlobe gently. “You know Uncle Tommy from the photos, right?”

Emmy nodded. “My brother’s name is Tommy too.”

“Yeah, your dad just told me,” Tommy replied. He turned to the younger Tommy, who had his arms wrapped around his dad’s legs and his head rested against his hip. “Hi, Tommy.”

Tommy looked at the older Tommy – Oliver figured they would have to find a solution for that soon – for a moment. He let go of Oliver’s legs then and said, “I go to mommy.”

Oliver looked after his son with a smile. Only when Emmy left his side to explore the entire room too, he turned his eyes away to his friend Tommy. He had pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants, looking at where his namesake had gone.

“I feel like he doesn’t like me.”

“Tommy doesn’t get used to people easily. It took at least six months for him to get used to me.” Oliver chuckled, watching Felicity lift Tommy onto Laurel lap and showing him a game to play at her computers. “He’s a real mama’s boy.”

Tommy, as in Tommy Merlyn, smiled. He watched Laurel showing Tommy the computer game and helping him with the first moves. A content even if slightly sad smile spread on his lips.

“I am really happy for you and Laurel, you know?” Tommy asked eventually.

Oliver looked at his friend and quickly shook his head. “No, we-“

“You don’t have to say anything,” Tommy interrupted him. “Like I said, our fights have been meaningless. You and Laurel, you always belonged together. It’s why I broke up with her in the first place. It was always destined to be just like this. I just hope that you are serious about this and don’t screw this up. Laurel doesn’t deserve that. Who knows, sooner or later, when I have processed all of this, I will be ready and fortunate to find something like this for myself too. I mean… a lack of available women shouldn’t be the case right?”

Oliver was still caught up into Tommy’s words about wishing Laurel and him all the happiness in the world. It took him a moment to realize that his friend was looking in a certain direction. Oliver followed the direction of Tommy’s gaze and frowned when he caught sight of Felicity. Frowning, he looked back and forth between his wife and the man who used to be his best friend.

“Uhm, that’s- you can’t-“ Oliver stopped and cleared his throat. He took a few steps back, so he could grab Felicity’s hand and pull her forward towards Tommy with him. His arm wrapped around her waist, holding her close to his side. “Tommy, this is my wife, Felicity.”

“Oh,” Tommy said, his gaze shooting to Laurel briefly. “I thought you and her-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted him quickly, shaking his head. “We had this one night and that was it. We both knew it was a mistake. It took me another two years to allow myself to feel the way I feel for Felicity, but… she’s my whole life now.”

“Well, I am actually a sixth of it,” Felicity replied. “I’d say a small sixth, but that would be mathematically impossible as a sixth indicates that it’s divided in six equal parts, a sixth it is.”

“Okay,” Tommy said slowly, unsure what to do with that piece of information it seemed. Eventually, he shook Felicity’s hand, looking her up and down. “You look familiar. Do we know each other?”

There was a moment of pause and Oliver could feel himself tensing a little at the reminder of what had happened when Tommy and Felicity had met each other the last time. He knew that it hadn’t been Tommy’s fault, and he probably couldn’t even remember it clearly. It still made him uncomfortable to think about it.

Felicity was the first to recover from the question. She cocked her head. “For the record, that was a lame pick-up line even ten years ago.”

“Oh, no, I wasn’t- I mean you’re his wife and-“

“She’s joking,” Oliver helped out with a smile. He leaned his lips against Felicity’s temple, kissing it. “Be easy on him.”

Felicity smiled at Tommy. “I set up the wi-fi at Verdant.”

“Oh, right,” Tommy replied, nodding slowly. “I remember. Felicity Smoak, right?”

“Yes, exactly,” Felicity said with a happy smile. “Well, now Queen.”

Tommy nodded. “You conquered Ollie’s heart?”

“It was a challenge, but I managed to do it,” Felicity replied.

“Effortlessly,” Oliver added in a whisper.

Felicity smiled at him shortly, gently slapping his chest, before she turned back to Tommy. “By the way, how would you like us to call you. Thomas? Tom? Bob?”

“Bob?” he asked, perking up his eyebrows.

“Well, Bob is just a placeholder for any name really,” Felicity explained. “You can choose whatever you like.”

“Actually, everyone calls me Tommy.”

Felicity hissed. “Yeah, but that’s my son’s name, so you have to pick something else.”

Tommy shot Oliver a nervous glance, who nodded, wordlessly confirming that Felicity was probably serious.

“Well… I…”

Felicity waved it off. “Don’t worry. You don’t have to decide this right now. There are more important things for now.”

Tommy shot a short look into Laurel’s direction. She was still sitting at the small workstation, the young Tommy on her lap and Millie standing close. Meanwhile, Felicity beckoned for Thea to come closer. Thea pulled her bottom lip between her front teeth and came closer. She stepped to Felicity’s side, who put a hand to her sister-in-law’s back.

“Hi,” Thea said quietly, smiling at Tommy.

“Hey,” Tommy replied, smiling back hesitatingly. “And congratulations I guess.”

Thea frowned for a moment before Tommy nodded down to her baby bump. She followed his nod with her eyes and smiled. Her hand came to rest on the swell of her stomach, stroking up and down slowly.

“Thanks,” she said. “It’s only a few more weeks. Roy and I are currently trying to find a name. We have a little trouble with the middle name, but we are hopeful that we have it done before the baby is born.”

“Sounds great,” Tommy replied, nodding slowly. “Ollie told me that you and… are siblings.”

“Crazy, right?” Thea asked.

“Kind of, yes.”

Oliver looked back and forth between his friend and his – or rather their – half-sister. The situation was a little tense and confusing, but there was no way it couldn’t be with everything that had happened. There were a lot of unspoken words and feelings in the air, but it just wasn’t time to voice any of them yet.

“I am really glad we get a second chance here,” Thea said after a moment and stepped forward to hug Tommy. He seemed to be a little overwhelmed with it, so Thea stepped out of the hug again quickly and just smiled at him gently. “It always sucked you didn’t know I was your sister.”

“Yeah, it does,” Tommy replied, nodding his head. “We should talk about that someday. Just not today. I think I need to find someone who can help me figuring out how to be resurrected officially and where to live.”

“Well, those questions can be answered easily,” Felicity replied, “because the answer is with us and we are going to figure it out.”

Tommy hesitated. “Are you sure?”

Felicity nodded. “Absolutely.”

She stepped forward and put her hands to Tommy’s shoulder, whispering something into his ear that made him smile quietly. She kissed his cheek briefly before she looked at him and Tommy nodded.

Oliver felt his throat growing tight at seeing these two together in this way. Tommy had been his best friend, the one he had told everything before the island. Felicity was the most important person to him now. She had added so much to him becoming the man he was now. That they two finally got the chance to interact made him more emotional than he was comfortable to admit.

“Maybe we should celebrate this with a little champagne,” Felicity suggested then. “Well, Laurel’s out. Thea’s out. Oliver needs to drive, so he’s out too. Tommy?”

He shook his head. “Thanks, no. I still feel like I just woke up from a long party weekend on Max Fuller’s yacht.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “More alcohol for me.”

Oliver leaned over to Tommy, whispering, “She just stopped breastfeeding after two close pregnancies. She’s desperate for everything she had to quit during the last years.”

“I come with you,” Thea said, linking her arm with Felicity’s as they left to get the drinks.

Tommy stepped a little closer to Oliver. “Are you okay with her offer? I mean… I am sure you have your hands full with your family and your lives. I don’t want to-”

“Absolutely sure,” Oliver replied. He smiled after Felicity. “Besides, Felicity already made the decision, and I can’t really say no to her.”

Tommy smiled. “She seems like a genuinely nice person.”

“She’s the best, and it’s almost impossible not to like her if you aren’t a crazy villain.”

Tommy chuckled. “I can see why.”

Oliver smiled. It felt like Christmas, his birth, Eastern and Hanukkah had come all on one day. Probably even better. He’d get a chance to make things right with his friend. Felicity got a chance to know Tommy. Laurel got a chance to make things right with Tommy if she wanted to. Most importantly, Tommy got a new chance on life. There was nothing else that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. That was the complete angst storyline. Of course there will be some more chapters that show the aftermath of this, the next chapter included. This was the heart of the storyline, though, and it’s done.
> 
> I wanted to thank you all for your wonderful comments. I didn’t think this storyline would get so much love. I wasn’t even completely happy with the way I wrote it, so your excitement made me all the more happy. 
> 
> I did have some trouble writing these past days and have busy days ahead of me. On top of that, I have to take care of Olicity Secret Santa and work on my new multichapter, so it will take a while until I get back to posting more, but certainly not too long as I am already working on the next chapter. I will post it at the weekend or after the crossovers. It includes some thoughts on Merlyn, especially Felicity’s thoughts, and some smut.
> 
> PS: The amazing response to this storyline reenforces my idea for the next angst storyline and the 300th chapter. It’s even bigger than this one, mixing emotional plotpoints and action more thant this did. There might or might not be some foreshadowing in the next chapter... #JustSaying


	268. Fragments of broken souls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS INCLUDES SMUT!

When her computer beeped, the search coming back without any results, Felicity felt the little bit of hope that had kept her going through these last hours crushing. She felt tears of frustration welling in her eyes. For more than two weeks now, she had worked on this the best she could. She had spent more time on this than on anything else, skipping work for continuing her search and expanding the parameters of it whenever she had been met with a dead end. Yet, she hadn’t come one step closer to finding Malcolm Merlyn.

Felicity closed her eyes. Wiping away the single tear that had fallen, she took in a deep breath. She couldn’t let herself be drowned in desperation and self-pity because, as soon as she would, she’d give up. Now wasn’t the time to give up, though. Now was the time to only push harder. Sooner or later Malcolm would get lazy, thinking he was safe wherever he had run to hide, and, if that happened, Felicity would be there, ready to catch him.

The thought stirred up her anger and hate about the man who had ruined so many lives in the past years and who had, after a decade of living in the shadows, come back only to ruin their lives once more. Malcom had gotten away with too many cruel things for way too long.

He had killed Robert and almost killed Oliver when Robert had no longer followed his demands to help preparing the Undertaking. Yet, he had come away with it because he had blackmailed Moira with Thea’s safety. Then he had accomplished the Undertaking, taking more than five hundred lives, including the one of his son. They had thought he had paid for that with his life, taken by Oliver’s hand, but he hadn’t. Instead, he had come back, setting up Thea against Oliver and drugging her, so she would kill Sara. Again, he had gotten away with it because, with killing Sara, he had set up the League against Oliver. Then of course Oliver thinking it was the best idea to have Malcolm teach him and free him after Thea had turned him in to the League hadn’t helped either.

They had had their peace for more than ten years. Even with Malcolm getting away unscathed, at least they had thought he wouldn’t bother them any longer. With his track record, they should have probably known that Malcolm would never stop trying to destroy their lives. Even though Felicity believed that he loved Thea in the twisted and damaged way that he loved people, he just didn’t love her enough to spare her brother as he blamed him for a lot of things that had gone wrong in his life. Felicity didn’t know if Malcolm was really so stupid to believe that Thea would want anything to do with him if he deliberately destroyed Oliver’s and, with it, part of Thea’s family.

Now he had come back, hurting her family by trying to rip them apart. He had managed to at least create some cracks between them and inside of every single member of the family. Donna was barely talking to Oliver. William was understanding, but it was obvious that he was still disappointed about being lied to all this time. The other kids suffered from the long absence of their daddy. Tommy Merlyn – Felicity tried to go with Thomas, but she didn’t succeed all the time – was trying to find his place in this, at least for him, new world. Thea struggled with focusing on her soon to be born baby with everything that was going on. Laurel was trying to deal with yet another one of her exes coming back from the dead, breaking up with Liam to take some time to think. They all had been damaged one way or the other through Malcolm’s latest actions.

It didn’t matter, though. This had to end now, and Felicity would be the one to end it.

A window on her right monitor opened, showing the footage of the camera that she had installed in the elevator. Felicity bit her tongue, thinking that at least she knew it was working now. She would have rather found out hours later or some other day or whatever since she would have rather been alone for some time longer. She could only work on this if she wasn’t distracted.

Even when the elevator doors opened behind her, Felicity didn’t turn around. She didn’t stop typing either. She just continued working on getting access to even more databases. She could feel Oliver’s gaze in the back of her neck, her heckles rising in response. Yet, Felicity didn’t turn around. She continued typing, organizing the new databases she had access to all around the world, to make handling the search easier. Felicity was just holding her breath and waiting for Oliver to do or say something. The fact that he didn’t made her nervous.

It took some time before she saw from the corner of her eye that Oliver was approaching her slowly. He sat down at the edge of her desk, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Even without taking her eyes off the monitor, she could see him staring at her. Her typing slowed down for a moment as she felt the inevitability of a fight or, well, at least a heated discussion. She quickly went back to her usual typing pace.

“Why are you up already? It’s not even seven,” Felicity told him, not looking up from the monitor. When Oliver didn’t answer, Felicity shot him a brief look, but she quickly looked away again. The way he had his eyebrows perked up, the slightest of a reproach beneath the expression of disbelief, made her uncomfortable. Her stomach twisted as she knew exactly what he was thinking. Yet, she quickly added, “You should have slept in. Down here in the bunker, there is not much to do for you right now, neither up there in the offices. I mean according to yesterday’s survey, you are even more favored than you have been before this whole story. The kids should still be asleep, too. Even if they were awake, you could have easily taken them with you to bed for some good cuddles. I am sure they would have loved that and-“

“Are we honestly going to pretend that you don’t know what I am doing here?”

Felicity’s typing slowed down once more, and this time it came to end completely. Hesitatingly, Felicity pulled her hands away from the keyboard, pushing them under her butt instead. She still kept her eyes focused on the monitor, watching the cursor blink at the end of the command she had typed. Only a few more characters were missing to activate it.

Silence filled the spacious room. Felicity felt tears welling in her eyes, but she bit them back. Instead, she focused on taking deep breaths, trying to control her emotions. There was a whirlwind going on inside of her, and it had been going on inside of her for a long time now. It was quietly growing and growing until it would fill her completely, tearing apart everything inside of her. She knew it was probably the healthiest to let it all out, but she couldn’t. So, she just bit down on her tongue instead.

The silence continued some longer before Oliver released a deep sigh. He got up from the desk, walking over to her and crouching down in front of her chair, his hands stroking up and down her thighs. Felicity could feel the warmth of his skin reaching through her dress. Usually it would make her skin prickle in the best way possible, but not today.

“Stop that.” Felicity asked with quiet voice.

She slid a few inches away with her chair, and Oliver pulled his hands back, keeping them in his lap. He cocked his head slightly, the expression in his eyes trying to reach through to her deepest corners of her soul. Felicity tried to hold his gaze, just staring back at him. It wasn’t long until she felt overwhelmed by the way she knew he could just read in her like in an open book. Biting down on her tongue and doing her best to ignore the burning feeling in her throat, she lowered her eyes.

“You need to stop this, Felicity,” Oliver whispered. “You can’t sneak out of bed in the middle of the night, saying you just want to get a glass of water and then leaving the house like that. For now, Malcolm is gone and there is nothing we can do to find him right now if we don’t want to leave our home and our kids and chase him all around the world. I know it’s hard. I know you don’t want to. I-“

“It’s not hard,” Felicity explained, shaking her head. She looked at Oliver intently. “It’s impossible.”

“Felicity-“

Felicity got up, shaking her head. She walked to the other side of the room, her hands on her hips. She took in a deep breath, trying to focus on anything but the burning feeling of anger in the pit of her stomach. Neither the few structural components Cisco had already ordered to deliver here nor the few items from their old lair – med table, training mats and some cupboards with their medical equipment – managed to distract her though. Turning around and walking back into Oliver’s direction. He was sitting in her chair by now, watching her wordlessly.

“You are going to get stomach ulcers,” Oliver said calmly. “Just let it out.”

“This man has destroyed lives for more than fifteen years, and we are just supposed to let him go?” Felicity asked angrily. “Malcolm doesn’t shy away from killing innocents, more than five hundred already and I am sure it doesn’t end there. He doesn’t even stop at his kids. He was responsible for Tommy’s death and for dragging him back into life as this soulless shell of a person. He drugged Thea to kill a friend of hers. He set up the League of assassins against you. Now he came back and tried to drive a wedge between us, and, since that didn’t happen, caused you to go to jail instead. Now you might be more favored as the mayor, but, if we look at all the changes, that really is the only positive one. My mom doesn’t trust you. William is disappointed about being lied to. The kids are horrified whenever you leave the house. We had to give up the lair and the Arrow. And, as if that wasn’t enough yet, an innocent man will spend the rest of his life in jail. So, what happens when we aren’t going to find him again? I am sure he won’t just let go of us. No, Malcolm will come back at us once more, and I cannot and will not spend my life in the fear that, the next time he comes back, he will kill you, hurt one of our kids or abduct Thea’s baby to get a part of his dysfunctional family back. You chickened out of letting Malcolm be killed even when he was already in the hands of the League. If it hadn’t been for your misguided notion of protecting Thea, Malcolm Merlyn would already rot in hell by now. Instead, he is out there, planning his next attack against us. I won’t let that happen. I am not going to rest until I have found him and smashed his worthless, crippled heart with my own hands.”

As Felicity stopped now, her heart pounding against her ribs and her heartbeat echoing in her ears, Oliver perked up his eyebrows. He had listened to her every word without batting an eye. Despite the reproaches she had just confronted him with, he didn’t look tense. He didn’t look exactly hurt about her words, either.

“Finished?” Oliver asked.

“Yes,” Felicity replied without hesitation.

“Do you want to come here and let me comfort you then?”

“No,” Felicity replied even more quickly this time. “I want you to tell me that I am right and that you will help me to find that son of a bitch.”

Oliver sighed, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “You know I would always help and support you no matter what, but with this-“

“You want him to get away with it again?”

“No,” Oliver replied, shaking her head vehemently. “I don’t want him to get away with it, but I don’t see any way how we can get to him without playing into his hands and ripping our family apart. If we chase him now, then we will let him win.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. There was something true to what he had said. Chasing Malcolm from behind her computer wasn’t going to get them anywhere, at least that was what the last weeks had proved, hadn’t they? They could leave and search at all the places Malcolm could be, hoping to find him one day, so they could make him accountable. They’d have to leave the kids and their home behind for a long time to do that, though.

“I can’t just sit back and do nothing,” Felicity whispered, shaking her head.

“We won’t sit back and do nothing,” Oliver replied. “We will keep our eyes and ears open, using all the technology in the world to be prepared when that bastard shows his face again. Once he does, we will fight him, and he will go down.”

There was a beat of silence. Felicity looked at Oliver intently, searching for any sign that he was just trying to calm her down. The expression on his face showed nothing but determination, though.

“Promise?” she asked nonetheless.

Oliver nodded. “Promise.”

When Felicity released a deep breath that she hadn’t known she had been holding, she felt most of her anger vanish. It wouldn’t go away completely until Malcolm would rot in hell, but it would hopefully stay quiet enough to let her live her life. Oliver was right. They couldn’t let Malcolm win, and he would win if she’d allow him to control her every thought and every action. He had done enough to them. She couldn’t let him rip their family apart once more.

With two large steps, Felicity crossed the distance towards Oliver and climbed onto his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and, with one leg to each side of his hip, she just pressed herself to him as much as possible. Dropping her head to his shoulder, she pressed her nose to the side of his neck and breathed him in. Oliver’s warm hands stroked over her back, holding her to him.

“I’m sorry,” Felicity whispered.

“It’s okay,” Oliver replied. “I knew you would leave the house when you left the bed and-“

“No, not for that.” Felicity pulled back a little. “For saying it’s your fault Malcolm got to do this.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “It’s not far from the truth, is it? I mean… I had my reasons for wanting to save him, but fact is that not even now Thea thinks I should have done it. It’s just… I know how much the burden of having killed someone can pull you down and tear you apart. I wouldn’t want Thea to experience something like that.”

“She already did,” Felicity told him, “because Malcolm made her kill Sara.”

“But she didn’t know what she was doing and this time it would have been her choice and-“

“See? Her choice,” Felicity pointed out. “I know you got a lot better at letting others make their own choices. Yet, you still struggle to do so sometimes. So, let me tell you that Thea could have very well lived with Malcolm’s death by the hands of the League, and, if Malcolm comes back and I get my hands on him, I won’t shy away from killing him, too. And it won’t bother me one bit. I could very well live with that decision.”

“You don’t know what you are talking about,” Oliver whispered, shaking his head. He stroked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “And that is why you can be sure that I won’t turn a blind eye on anything that we will find out about Malcolm Merlyn. I will follow whatever lead there is to make sure you will never get your hands on him and feel tempted to convert your anger into actions. You might think that you can handle it and that you can live with the consequences of killing someone, but I don’t think you can because nobody with empathy or a conscience can just kill someone.”

Felicity frowned. “You want to tell me that there is not a single kill that you think was right?”

“There is a difference between thinking it was right and…” Oliver considered his choice of words for a moment before he shrugged his shoulders, “being able to live with it.”

Felicity looked at Oliver intently. She knew how much he still struggled with the person he used to be. At times, she would see him watch their children with the sad expression on his face that told her he was thinking about all the lives he had taken, all the sons and fathers he had killed. She doubted it would ever completely go away. She wasn’t sure if really every single kill was just as bad as the other.

“Let’s not talk about that now,” Felicity replied. She sighed and rested her head back on Oliver’s shoulders. “I am tired.”

“Because you let off steam, so the anger that kept you up these past days is gone, and the tiredness is crashing over you.”

The tips of Felicity’s fingers played with the neckline of his henley. She stroked them over his collarbone and tugged the neckline down a little, so she could brush the softest of a kiss against his pulse point. When she pulled back a little, locking her eyes with Oliver, she put her hands to his shoulders. She lifted herself off Oliver’s lap a little before thrusting down and adding and move back and forth to it, so her core was rubbing against the zipper of his jeans and pressing down on his cock perfectly. Oliver’s fingers dug into her hips in response.

“There might be some steam left,” Felicity told Oliver, the seductiveness leaving no doubt that she had a way to get rid of it in mind.

Oliver licked his lips, and Felicity had to swallow. She could already feel her core tingling with the need for more. Since the kids were sleeping in their bed and they had little to no time just for each other with Tommy living with them, they had had no time to reconnect like that. Sex was a major part of their relationship, so whenever they were apart for even just a night or they had gotten into a fight and reconciled, or they celebrated or were just in the right mood, they had sex. Right now, they really needed sex.

“Want me to help with that?”

Felicity grinned. Her fingers tightened on Oliver’s shoulders as she lifted herself up and thrust down on him once more, this time earning herself a low moan.

“I think all you have to do is hold still,” Felicity whispered. “I am going to take care of the rest.”

“Consider me your personal tool to let off steam,” Oliver suggested and leaned back in the chair a little. “I am all yours.”

Felicity’s grin widened. “Yes, you are.”

There was another moment of silence that they just looked at each other. There was a wordless agreement, both of them making sure they wanted the exact same thing – a quickie, simple and fast to just get rid of the sexual tension they had felt in the last couple of days. The way their eyes had met across the room again and again these past days, their skins tingling whenever they had touched and their frustration growing whenever they had sneaked away but gotten interrupted, there just wouldn’t be time or patience for more. They would have to take their time later. This time it had to go fast.

Only the beat of a second later, their lips met in a passionate kiss. Felicity’s hands grabbed the hair at the back of Oliver’s neck and pulled his head back, so she could deepen the kiss. She knew it turned him on and would help him to get into the right mood soon. She could feel the evidence between her legs as he hardened against her core.

Felicity thrust down harder, trying to get the right angle to stimulate her most sensitive parts, so she’d get wet quickly. Her skirt rid up her thighs, pooling around her waist. Oliver’s hand pushed between their bodies, his fingers pushing her panties aside before stroking between her folds. Felicity released a long moan, her hips moving even more frantically to get his fingers where she wanted and needed them though she wasn’t sure if her clit or her entrance needed him more. Oliver took that decision from her, his fingers finding her entrance and stroking around the sensitive skin there.

Unable to wait any longer, she moved her hand down his chest and right to his belt. She unbuckled it quickly and wasted no time to unbutton his jeans and lower the zipper. Her hand reached into his pants, taking hold of his erection, just when his fore- and middle finger dipped inside of her. Felicity moaned, about to pull away, but Oliver kept her lips in place, putting his hand to the back of her head. Eagerly, he swallowed the sounds of pleasure that left her lips.

When Oliver’s thrust a little deeper inside, Felicity squeezed his length particularly hard. Their lips broke apart, both of them pulling away at the same time. As their eyes locked, they wordlessly agreed that it was time to move this along. Oliver wiggled his hips, so Felicity could pull his pants down a little bit more. She lifted herself off Oliver’s lips, and he kept her panties out of the way, so she could position the tip of hic erection at her entrance and sink down on him slowly.

Sitting back in his lap, his cock buried deep inside of her, they looked at each other for a long moment. Felicity massaged the back of Oliver’s head. His hands gripped her hips harder. At the same moment, they started moving, still looking at each other intently. Felicity lifted herself off his lap just a little before she thrust back down hard. Oliver answered her down-thrust with an up-thrust.

Their moved in perfect synch, their eyes locked to create the intimacy only they could create. Silence embraced them, just interrupted by their low pants. There was little to no finesse to their movements. Unlike most of the time they had sex, they didn’t kiss, and they didn’t touch. They didn’t tease each other and giggle together either. They just moved, never breaking eye contact.

It wasn’t long until Felicity could feel her orgasm approaching. Her hands sank down from his head to his shoulders, gripping them tightly. Oliver’s hands helped guiding the movements of Felicity’s hips, pulling her down onto him even more firmly. Felicity leaned her head forward, resting her forehead against Oliver’s. They breathed the same air, his breath ghosting over her face.

It didn’t take much longer until, finally, they came at the same time. Oliver’s cock twitched inside of her just when her walls started fluttering around him. The prickling feeling spread from the tip of her toe through the rest of her body as Oliver’s arms tightened around her and held her to his body. Slight spasms were rolling through their bodies as their rid out their orgasms.

As their bodies came to rest, their lips met in a gentle kiss. It was a slow kiss, some wordless thanks and a wordless declaration of love. If the foreplay had to be cut short, the afterplay was all the more intense.

“You’re smiling,” Oliver whispered against Felicity’s lips, not yet stopping to kiss her.

“I am,” Felicity replied.

At that, Oliver angled his head back to look at her face. Her smile soon infected him, and a smile of his own spread on Oliver’s lips too. Their lips met in another kiss, their hands now stroking over each other’s body through the clothes. Felicity pushed the hem of Oliver’s Henley up a little, so she could explore the abs underneath and-

A low beeping of her computer made them pull apart.

“Oh, frack,” Felicity said. “Tommy.”

She quickly got up, trying to ignore the feeling of need she felt growing back stronger when Oliver slipped out of her. While she was adjusting her dress, Oliver got up and pulled his pants up. When the elevator doors opened, Felicity looked as fine as possible, Oliver was still busy buckling his belt, though.

“Tommy,” Felicity hurried to say. “No, wait. It’s Thomas. I really have to remind myself on that.”

“I feel like the mean servant in Downton Abbey when you call me that.”

Felicity cocked her head. “Downton Abbey?”

“Laurel made me watch it when we were together,” Tommy said with a sigh. “Dark times, my friends, dark times.”

“The things we do out of love.” Felicity chuckled. When she felt the wetness soaking her panties, she rubbed her thighs together. “I’ll be back in five minutes. I just gotta go the ladies’ room.”

While Felicity quickly hurried to the elevator, Oliver stayed back. He said down on her chair once more, looking at his friend. He couldn’t count how many times he had seen him since he had come back now, but his brain still refused to believe it.

When the elevator doors closed behind Felicity, Tommy turned his head back over his shoulder shortly before he looked at Oliver and cocked his head.

“Did I just walk in on a little one-on-one?”

Oliver puckered his lips. “I guess you just got the experience most of our friends and family have made, so I’d say welcome to the family.”

Tommy scrunched up his nose. “Gross.”

Oliver chuckled. “You will get used to it.”

“Yeah, please just… don’t.”

They both laughed in amusement and once more Oliver felt like he couldn’t be any happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY OLICITY - THE REAL OLICITY - IS MARRIED! I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE IT! AND WE GET SO MANY WEDDING RITUALS NEXT EP, EVEN CAKE FEEDING! OMG!
> 
> That being said, there’s a new little survey to collect some new ideas for the future already because I was just feeling like it, [here](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfP0H1g4pXX9GxmISHtlE388O_va--f8GqpMr5W0ruFzNr96g/viewform?usp=sf_link).   
> 
> 
> I can’t say when I will update the next time. I started working on a new multichapter and have to work on my Olicity Secret Santa gift. My usual writing heavy evenings - Friday and Saturday - have been canceled for babysitting my Emmy and Tommy inspirations and meeting some friends for the Christmas Market. I hope to get some writing done tomorrow and Sunday, though. 


	269. Moving

As soon as Felicity stepped out into the garden, a cold gush of wind made her shiver. She quickly closed the door behind her, keeping the cold air outside. After that, she grabbed the lapels of Oliver’s hoodie jacket she wore and pulled them together on her front before she crossed her arms to trap the fabric where it was.

“Please tell me it’s warmer in your tent,” Felicity asked.

“It is!” Emmy replied immediately and pulled down the zipper to open the tent for Felicity. “Come in, Mommy.”

“Gladly.”

Felicity climbed into the tent. Emmy pulled the zipper back into place and quickly hurried to where her blanket with the unicorn had been discarded. She grabbed it, wrapped it around her shoulders and sat down in Thomas’ lap. Thomas – Felicity tried to say that name as often as possible to get used to it – hesitated, unsure of what to do with a kid so close before he wrapped his arms around Emmy’s waist loosely. On another sleeping mat, Oliver sat with his legs crossed, Millie in his lap and Tommy snuggled to his side.

“It looks comfortable here,” Felicity said, “and it’s surprisingly warm.”

“Shielded from the wind, it’s actually good,” Tommy, no, Thomas said.

Felicity smiled. As much as she was getting used to calling him Thomas, sometimes she still struggled. It was easier when she was talking to the kids because she often just called him Uncle Tommy then. She just couldn’t call him Tommy because her son was already Tommy. Thomas had suggested just calling Tommy Little Tommy, but that had only reminded Felicity of her nickname for one of her favorites of Oliver’s body parts. Thinking about her husband’s crotch whenever she talked about her son was just no good idea.

“Sit down,” Thomas suggested, “or do you need to get back to Addie and-“

“No, she’s quite content alone for a few minutes,” Felicity replied. She patted the baby monitor that was attached to the waistband of her jeans. “She will let me know when I have to go back inside.”

She sat down next to Oliver cross-legged. Putting her hands around his bicep, she rested her head against his shoulder. When Oliver kissed the crown of her head in response, Felicity angled her head back. Their eyes met, and they both smiled at each other.

These last days, normality had finally gotten back into their lives. After everything that had happened with Oliver’s arrest and Malcom’s escape, never mind Thomas’ resurrection, it felt good to go back to a calmer life. Well, as far as their life had ever been calm. William had forgiven Oliver. His mayoral campaign was going better than ever. Thomas was getting used to being officially alive again. Things were falling into place, and it was a good feeling they finally did.

Thomas cleared his throat, interrupting the intense way Oliver and Felicity looked at each other. Felicity looked away. She pulled her bottom lip between her front teeth, feeling herself blushing. The one thing she wasn’t used to was that, with another adult living in the house, staring at her husband longingly actually led to interruptions followed by blushes rather often.

“Are you doing things like this more often?”

“Things like what?” Oliver asked.

Thomas shrugged his shoulders, gesturing around the tent. “Like this. Camping in the garden. I mean… with everything that happened I guess that you didn’t really got to lead your normal family life, so are special things like this normal or are they… well… special?”

“Sometimes we do thing like this,” Felicity replied. “I mean of course they are special, but we try to make it a regular kind of special.”

“Sometimes we go to the zoo,” Emmy added.

“Or to see the stars.”

Felicity smiled at Tommy before explaining to Thomas, “Tommy loved seeing stars.”

“Oh, I know. He showed me his special lights last week,” Thomas replied with a smile. Then he frowned slightly. “You two are handling this whole parenting thing really good, you know?”

“We are trying,” Oliver replied. “We have busy jobs and a lot of obligations, but we are trying to be good parents.”

“You are,” Thomas said firmly. “I mean if I compare you to our parents, you are spending way more time with your kids than ours ever did with us, never mind what they did when they did spend time with us. It must be great to have a family like this to right the wrongs of your parents and-”

“I am actually trying not to right my parents’ wrongs anymore,” Oliver explained. “Apart from that, having a family is the most important part of my life.”

Thomas nodded slowly and lowered his eyes. The thought had to make him incredibly sad given that, if his father hadn’t been, he might have a family of his own by now. Instead, he had lost a decade of his life and had no idea who he really was now.

“Uncle Tommy, do you come trick or treat with us for Halloween?” Emmy asked him, leaning back against his chest and angling her head, so she could look at him.

“You do that?” Thomas asked.

Tommy nodded. “Every year.”

“Sounds cool,” Thomas replied. “I’d love to come with you.”

“Ask them about the theme for their costumes,” Felicity whispered loudly.

When Oliver pursed his lips, shooting her a somewhat annoyed look, Felicity just grinned innocently. Thomas looked from one to the other with a frown, and Felicity nodded at him encouragingly in response.

“So… do you already have costumes?” Thomas asked the kids.

“We will go as superheroes,” Tommy answered, smiling happily. “I go as the Flash like Uncle Barry.”

“Cool,” Thomas replied, nodding his head. He looked at Emmy. “What about you?”

“I go as Supergirl. She is super cool, a super cool Supergirl” Emmy said, her voice full of excitement.

Thomas looked at Oliver and Felicity with perked up eyebrows. “Who’s Supergirl?”

“Long story,” Felicity explained. “Super long story actually.”

“Okay,” Thomas said. He looked at Millie. “What about you, Sweetie? Who is your superhero?”

“Hm-hmmmh,” Millie hummed behind her pacifier.

Oliver chuckled before he mimicked her. “Hm-hmmmmh?”

Millie smiled, snuggling her head against Oliver’s arm and playing with his fingers. She tried to pull his wedding band from his ring finger, but Oliver tightened his hand to a fist, stopping her to do so. She released a discontent whine at that, but Oliver tickled her stomach and she giggled.

“She’s going as Pretty Bird,” Emmy explained.

Thomas perked up his eyebrows. “And who’s that?”

Felicity chuckled. “It’s Emmy’s nickname for Laurel.”

Thomas smiled. “Pretty Bird…”

Felicity knew that Thomas and Laurel hadn’t worked through anything yet. He was still trying to find his own place in the world, and Laurel was trying to get her head straight and figure out what she wanted. The situation was difficult. So many years had passed since their love story had found an abrupt and tragic end. Laurel had moved on and was now reminded of the unfinished business between them. The situation just sucked for them, and neither of them seemed to know what to do about it.

“So, Addie goes as daddy?” Thomas asked.

“Ha!” Oliver said, pointing at Thomas. “You hear that? Uncle Tommy thinks the same way.”

Felicity patted Oliver chest gently. “Honey, it would be a little weird if our daughter posed at the Arrow after you have been arrested for being him. You were released, but let’s not tempt fate.”

“The decision that Addie wasn’t going to be the Arrow has been made before the arrest, though. Besides, I could adapt a new persona. I actually have a few ideas about that already, and I talked to Cisco and-”

“Not yet,” Felicity told him.

The thought that he’d eventually go back in the field made her stomach twist. She had honestly thought about quitting her Arrow work and asking Oliver to do the same. With his arrest, she had just realized how dangerous the fire they were playing with actually was. Oliver didn’t only risk his life and his wellbeing every time he went out into the field. They both risked their freedom. They had been safe for so long that it was almost easy to forget. At the end, she had decided not to ask Oliver about it and to give her own work another try. They didn’t do this to receive and thank yous. They probably wouldn’t ever get those anyway. The city needed saving nonetheless, and, if they didn’t do it, who would?

“So, what’s going to be Addie’s costume?” Thomas asked.

“She’s going as Speedy,” Emmy replied. “You can go as Arsenal or Batman. Connor is already Spartan, and Sara goes as Overwatch. Mommy had to invent a costume for that because she doesn’t have any. She can’t just go with a ponytail and glasses, though. Everyone would know it’s mommy.”

“Do I have to dress up?”

Emmy looked at him incredulously. “Yes.”

“What about mommy and daddy? Do they dress up?”

“Yes, but they don’t go with the theme. They are the Beauty and the Beast,” Emmy said, shrugging her shoulders. “They said they can’t because of daddy’s arrest. We were only allowed because we had a superhero week in school, so Sara and I already had our costumes.”

Thomas nodded slowly. “Makes sense. And why did nobody want to go as daddy?”

“Because the Flash and Supergirl are cooler,” Tommy replied.

“And-“

When a low cry came from the monitor, Felicity quickly got up. “Okay, that’s my reminder of our sick baby girl inside. Have fun, guys.”

Felicity hurried to the house. Addie was lying in her playpen, the donkey her siblings had gotten her for her birth in her arms. Her cheeks and eyes were reddened. Her coughs interrupted the crying.

“Oh, my sweet, little girl,” Felicity whispered, lifting Addie into her arms. “Let’s go to the kitchen and get you some tea, okay? Tea will be good for you. It will also make the aching in your throat a little better.”

Felicity rubbed her hand up and down Addie’s back as she continued whispering soothing words to her ear and taking her to the kitchen. The little girl had caught a cold earlier this week. Her temperature was back down, but she was still coughing and crying a lot. It was part of the reason why Felicity had decided to stay inside with Addie instead of joining into the camping, not that camping was on her wish list of things to do. Raisa was on a short vacation, visiting her sister, so Felicity had decided to stay with Addie. Besides, it was nice to know Oliver and Thomas were having fun with the kids outside.

“That’s good,” Felicity whispered when she adjusted Addie’s position in her arm and started giving her the tea. “That’s good, right? Your throat is acing less, and you can maybe fall asleep for some longer. You haven’t slept much these last days or nights and-“

“Hey,” Thomas whispered when he stepped into the kitchen. “Am I bothering?”

“No,” Felicity said with a smile. “Addie just enjoys some tea.”

“I figured we could use some hot chocolate outside to warm us up a little. Maybe I should come back later, though, so you two-”

“If you take Addie, I am going to take care of the hot chocolate and-“

“Oh, I am not sure I- Oh, okay.”

Thomas looked insecure when Felicity just put Addie into his arms. After a moment of growing stiff, looking like he wanted to thrust the baby right back into her mother’s arms, he curled his arms around the little bundle of a human and held her to his chest. Addie didn’t seem to mind. She looked at him with her nosy, blue eyes and kept drinking from the tea.

“See?” she asked. “It’s not that hard.”

“I don’t think I will ever get used to this,” Thomas replied with a chuckle.

Felicity watched him slowly walking up and down while rocking Addie in his arms gently. He was a natural talent with kids if you asked Felicity. Even Tommy had grown used to him easily, so that had to mean something.

“It’s even harder to fathom how much of a dad Ollie is. Before the Undertaking he was barely able to commit to anyone for longer than a week and now he has this big family and…” Thomas shook his head. “It’s crazy.”

“You’re the only one who thinks that way,” Felicity replied. She poured some milk into a pot and added cocoa powder. “You just have to spend a little more time here, and you will soon see that Oliver just lives for his family. He’s a family man through and through, and you are part of this family now. I hope you know that.”

Tommy looked at her for a moment before he nodded slightly. “I am starting to realize it, yes.”

Felicity smiled. “Good.”

“Your reinforcement actually makes it easier to ask this,” Tommy said.

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Ask what?”

“I realized it was time to find out who I am and where I belong,” Tommy explained, “find out what I want to do with the rest of my life and everything, you know?”

“Yes, of course,” Felicity replied. “If you need help with any of that, help to get a job or anything-“

“I actually talked to Roy about that. We figured we could open up a second club,” Tommy explained, shrugging his shoulders, “so we’d both have something to work at without getting into each other’s way.”

Felicity smiled. “That’s a great idea.”

Tommy nodded slowly before he cleared his throat. “And I was thinking, to give you guys some normality back, I should move out.”

“You really don’t have to,” Felicity told him with firm voice. “You can stay as long as you want to.”

“Well, I wouldn’t move far away,” Tommy said, “just into the house next door if that’s okay for you.”

Felicity faltered for a moment, wondering what house was on the market when she remembered the Queenstons, who had moved into this street and already moved out again before they could have unpacked all their boxes.

“Oh, the Queenstons’ house?”

Thomas nodded. “It’s on the market, and it would be close by, so in case I ever need company, I could come here or invite you and Ollie or anyone over and… I mean… if that’s okay with you.”

“Of course it is,” Felicity replied with a smile. “Oliver will be happy if you aren’t moving too far away, and so will the kids. And I will be happy too of course. I hope you know that you can stay here as long as you want to, though. We won’t ever kick you out.”

“I definitely don’t want it to come that far anyway.” He looked down at Addie for a moment before he lifted his gaze again and shrugged his shoulders. “I am still trying to process everything that happened, but I think I need to move on rather than revel in the past. Moving out and trying to find footing in life is the first step.”

“Then we will support you with everything you need.”

“Okay,” Thomas said with a nod of his head and a relieved smile spread on his lips. “Thank you. Now I just have to hope the house isn’t cursed.”

Felicity frowned, stirring in the cacao. “Cursed?”

“Well, they lived there for barely a few weeks before they moved out and tried to sell it again,” Thomas explained. “Sounds a little like they’ve seen ghosts there.”

“Not exactly,” Felicity said, pouring the hot chocolate into a Thermos bottle. “I mean… they… yeah… there aren’t any ghosts there… not like that…”

She puckered her lips, trying to avoid Thomas’s gaze. When she had to look at him eventually anyway, Thomas had his eyebrows perked up in a quiet question. Felicity tried to ignore that, so she wouldn’t have to tell the story of how she had accidentally chased the Queenstons away. Since Thomas just continued staring at her, Felicity pursed her lips and groaned, though.

“Okay, so… I might have… kind of… accidentally… scared them away,” she said. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she turned around to Thomas more fully. “It wasn’t really my fault, okay? I mean… I did catch them during sex in their car in their open garage and then I did let them invite us to a swinger party. I just didn’t know it was a swinger party. Really, just because I say Oliver and I are open in our marriage, it doesn’t have to mean it’s an open marriage, right? There are so many other ways to be open in a marriage. Open to different places, different positions, different kinks, different people joining in- okay, that’s not really what we ever did. We haven’t even thought about it. It’s basically the only restriction we have. No others. But apart from that, there really are no limits. We try everything. Just not others which I guess you really don’t want to hear anything about, so it’s good the doorbell just rang, so I can leave.”

Felicity already hurried to the door, her head red from embarrassment. She could only hope that she had talked fast enough, so he hadn’t understood all of it.

“Wait, you can-“ Felicity gestured at Addie, already halfway out of the room. “I mean I can leave you alone with her, right?”

“Uhm… yeah…” Thomas said.

Felicity hurried to the door, still thinking about her words to Thomas when she opened it. Surprised she looked at the woman in front of her door.

“Samantha.”

“Hi, Felicity,” she said with a low sigh. “Can we talk?”

 

 

“Can we do a campfire, Daddy?” Tommy asked.

Oliver chuckled, shaking his head. “No, that’s not possible. We can’t just made a fire in our garden. The house could burn down and then we’d all have to sleep at Granny Donna’s place, and you all had to share a room, and mommy and I would have to share the couch.”

“But if mommy helps?” he asked. “She can control it.”

“I wish it was that easy,” Oliver replied. He smiled. “Are you having fun here, Buddy?”

Tommy nodded. “Can we see the stars later?”

“If it’s not too cold, sure.”

“And-“

“Hey,” Thomas – that name still sounded weird when he thought about his friend Oliver realized – said when he entered the tent, holding five mugs and a Thermos bottle in his hands. “You should go inside.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Did something happen?”

“No, but wifey and baby momma want to talk to you.”

“Wifey and baby momma?”

“I felt it was the right way to stress the dramatic moment of the situation. The one-night-stand you have a teenage son with and the love of your life who gave your four more which I still cannot believe has happened,” Tommy replied with a chuckle. “Anyway, you should go inside.”

Oliver nodded. He lay Millie, who had just fallen asleep, down on the sleeping mat and made sure she was safely tugged into the blanket. He wondered what Samantha wanted here. Since his arrest, the relationship between them had once again grown tense. Oliver understood that she wasn’t happy with what had happened. He wished he could have spared his kids all of that too. It hadn’t been possible, though. With a low groan, he got up then.

“Hey,” Thomas whispered when Oliver was about to walk past him.

Oliver stopped, perking up his eyebrows. “Did you talk to Felicity about your plans?”

“She supports them full-heartedly.”

Oliver smiled. “I told you she would.”

Thomas nodded. “She told me how she chased off your neighbors.”

Oliver pushed his tongue into his cheek, trying to keep from grinning. He loved teasing her about it. She had always said that, if someone was getting them on a swinger party, it was Oliver. Like one of his old friends meeting them and inviting them as it had probably been the kind of party he had made jokes of as a teenager, saying it was the only way to survive a marriage. Oliver just found it amusing.

“She is amusing though I have no idea how you understand a word. She’s talking like someone puts a gun to her head and tells her to rise her speaking rate. How do you even keep up with that?”

“Years of training,” Oliver replied.

“She really is a special kind of something, isn’t she?”

Oliver nodded, looking down at his feet with a beaming smile. “She’s… one of a kind, and she’s absolutely my kind.”

Thomas smiled. “I am glad you found her. She was probably exactly who you after, well, everything.”

“She was all I ever needed in my entire life,” Oliver explained. “I think my life would have been completely different if I had met her earlier.”

“You mean if you had been smart enough to realize she was the one then, right?”

Oliver grinned. “Exactly.”

“Well, if you wouldn’t have, I might have.”

Oliver cocked his head. “Don’t make me take back that resurrection.”

Tommy chuckled. “She’s yours. I got it.”

He clapped his friend’s shoulders before he got out of the tent and hurried to the house. Felicity and Samantha were sitting in the living room, neither of them saying a word. Addie was snuggled against Felicity’s chest, releasing low whimpers as she was falling asleep.

“Hey,” Oliver said, crossing the room and sitting down next to Felicity. “What’s going on? Did something happen to William?”

“No,” Samantha hurried to say, shaking her head. “No, absolutely not.”

“So, he’s still coming over for the weekend?”

Samantha nodded. “Yes.”

Oliver frowned slightly at her short answer. He shot a brief look to Felicity, but she was keeping her eyes down, following the movements of her fingers to Addie’s back. Oliver knew she was anything but happy that Samantha’s first reaction to his arrest had been trying to keep William safe and away from all this, hence, away from them for a while. He knew she understood where it had come from, but it just opened old wounds after Samantha’s way of protecting William always seemed to revolve around keeping him away from this family. Oliver felt the same way as Felicity, but he wasn’t sure he could take the moral high ground here. The arrest had been rightful after all. Anyway, he was disappointed that Samantha still didn’t seem to fully trust him with William. He couldn’t lie about that.

“So, what’s the deal here?” Oliver asked.

“William is going to ask you a question at the weekend, but I figured I should talk to you about it first,” Samantha replied, “so you aren’t ambushed with it.”

Felicity frowned, leaning her cheek against the top of Addie’s head. “What question?”

“William wants to move in with you guys.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Really?”

Samantha smiled kind of sadly, nodding her head. “He’s been playing with that idea for a while, but he only really decided about it now.”

“Why now?” Felicity asked. “What changed?”

“Well, he got accepted into Garrison Slate School of Starling City,” Samantha replied. “He applied a while ago, but he was only put on the wait list. One student in the tenth grade is moving at the end of November, so William can be taken. It’s a huge chance for him.”

“It is,” Felicity agreed. She shot Oliver a brief look. “Garrison Slate was the founder of S.T.A.R. Labs. The schools built in his name focus on technology and other science. They only take the best.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “It’s incredible he was accepted.”

“It is,” Samantha agreed with a proud smile. “The tuition is incredibly high, but it’s a great school. I want him to go there if he wants it, and I know he is being taken good care of here. I mean… he loves the both of you, and he loves his siblings. He enjoys being here.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. “Of course, William can come to live with us, and don’t worry about the tuition. We are going to pay it.”

Oliver smiled at Felicity, grateful she was just agreeing to this so easily. He hadn’t really thought anything else because he knew how amazing Felicity was. He just realized how lucky they were. Felicity didn’t bring up that it was going to be more work with a teenager in the house and that they had four other kids whose schools and hobbies and whatever else had to be financed and taken care of. William was her child as well as either of their other kids were. She loved William, and she loved him, so for her there was no question about what to do. He didn’t know if it was the normal way of marriage though his father had certainly done great with Thea, but Oliver was just incredibly grateful.

He stroked a hand over Felicity’s thigh, and she let go of their baby’s back to lace her fingers through his. Their eyes met, and they smiled at each other.

Clearing his throat, Oliver looked back at Samantha. “Anything else?”

“Well, admittedly, the school isn’t William’s only reason why he wants to move in with you now after all?”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “What else is there?”

“Jensen asked me to marry him,” Samantha replied, lifting her left hand to reveal a small diamond ring there. “William… doesn’t like him. I tried to talk to him about it, but he says he doesn’t know why he doesn’t like him. It’s just as it is. If I knew Jensen did anything wrong-“

“I don’t think he did,” Felicity interrupted her. “William told me he just can’t take to him. He doesn’t understand it himself. He doesn’t want to ruin that for you, though. He’s happy you are happy. Congratulations by the way.”

“Thanks.” Samantha smiled and rubbed her hands up and down her thighs. “Then it’s set. We can talk about the details some other time. I see you are busy.”

“I will see you to the door,” Oliver suggested.

“Not necessary,” Samantha replied as she got up and smiled. “I’ll find my way out. Talk to you soon. And thank you.”

“Thanks for coming by to tell us the news,” Oliver replied.

“Sure.”

When Samantha left, Oliver squeezed Felicity’s thigh gently. He waited until he could hear the front door falling shut before he turned his head to look at her.

“This was surprising.”

Felicity nodded. “It was. I am glad William thought of us, and Samantha agreed to this, though. It’s going to be interesting to have William here all the time.”

Oliver nodded, stroking his head up and down her thigh. When Felicity perked up her eyebrows, Oliver smiled.

“I just realized how lucky I am that William loves you as much as he does,” Oliver said. “It must suck for your child and your spouse not to get along.”

Felicity kissed Addie’s cheek before she smiled and replied with an amused smile, “It’s almost impossible not to like me.”

Oliver smiled. “You got Thomas wrapped around your little finger too.”

Felicity chuckled. “And there I though I had chased him off with babbling about our sex life.”

“He’s currently living with us and our kids. I think he knows that we have sex.”

“True,” Felicity replied. She pecked Oliver’s lips shortly. “I will go upstairs and prepare a bath for Addie now. She can use it when she wakes up in a few minutes.”

“I’ll go outside and check if there is still hot chocolate left.”

Oliver put his hand to Felicity’s cheek and kissed her once more. The kiss was longer. He pulled her bottom lip between both of his and scraped his teeth over it gently. When he released her lip, they smiled at each other.

“I love you,” Oliver whispered.

“I love you too.”

As they continued smiling at each other, Oliver stroked his fingertips over her cheek. He enjoyed the way she smiled so quietly like she didn’t have any worries. He hadn’t seen that smile too often these past weeks.

“How about we just take five minutes to stay here?” Oliver suggested.

Felicity smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. “Sounds perfect.”

Five minutes turned into ten as they fell asleep on the couch, and it wasn’t until Addie woke up half an hour later that they got up after all.


	270. In sickness and in health

Even for someone who didn’t know Felicity as well as he did, it was obvious how miserable she was. Her face was pale. Her lips had taken almost the same color as the rest of her face apart from the dark shadows under her glazed eyes. A thin film of sweat covered her face, making the strands of her hair that had fallen out of her ponytail stick to her skin.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, closing her car door behind her.

Oliver ignored her question and just crossed the distance to her. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders tightly, pulling her against his chest. He could feel her shivering slightly, and, when he pressed a comforting kiss to her forehead, he could feel how warm her skin was. The sweat seemed to do little to nothing to cool it. It only made him worry more.

“I’m gonna put you to bed now, okay?” Oliver whispered against her forehead. “I’m taking care of you.”

Careful not to move too quickly, Oliver put his left arm to the back of her knees and his right one around her back to lift her in his arms. Felicity groaned, her hand sinking against his shoulder. If the way she hid her face against the side of his neck with a groan was any indication, she was probably dizzy. He carried her to the door, relieved Raisa had already seen them and opened the door for them.

“Is Felicity okay?” she asked.

“I think Addie infected her,” Oliver replied in a whisper, knowing Felicity probably had a really bad headache. “I am going to take her upstairs and make sure she can sleep a little. Do you know if we have some chicken soup in the freezer?”

“We do, but I am actually cooking some now. Emmeline asked for it.”

“Is she sick too?”

“No,” Raisa replied with a chuckle. “She is in school. She just likes the soup, and she thinks it’s going to keep any cold away from her.”

Oliver smiled at her briefly, taking Felicity’s purse from her and dropping it to the floor, before he nodded towards the stairs, signaling Raisa that he was going to take Felicity upstairs now. She nodded and went back to the kitchen.

Oliver carried Felicity to their bedroom, lay her down on the bed and started undressing her. She was almost half asleep already, and he wondered how she had even made it home, the thought of what could have happened to her making his stomach twist. When she had called him to tell him she was heading home because she was feeling sick, he had wanted to pick her up, but she had already been on her way. Just like when he said he was hurt, if Felicity said she was sick, she really was sick.

“What’s going on with mommy?”

Turning his head back over his shoulder, Oliver saw Tommy standing in the door, his arms wrapped around Emmy’s pink giraffe tightly. Oliver smiled comfortingly, grabbing the green hoodie he had worn yesterday and pulling it over Felicity’s head.

“Mommy is sick,” Oliver replied.

“What do we do now?”

“We have to take care of mommy now,” Oliver told him. “We always have to take good care of our ladies, don’t we?”

Tommy nodded. “We do.”

When Felicity was put into his hoodie and some wool socks, Oliver pushed her into the middle of the mattress. Felicity mumbled something in her sleep, not completely aware of what was happening around her.

“Hey, Tommy, can you grab one of the wool blankets?” Oliver asked, nodding to the chest at the end of the bed. “I think mommy needs it warm.”

Tommy didn’t hesitate and ran over to the chest already. He put the pink giraffe down to the floor and opened the chest. He took the topmost blanket and carried it over to the bed to hand it to Oliver.

“Thanks, Buddy,” Oliver said with a smile.

He covered Felicity with the blanket, making sure she was safely tugged under it, before he pulled their usual blanket over her too.

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered into her pillow, rolling herself onto her side and bending her legs until her thighs were pressed against her chest. It was probably the way she could save the most of her body warmth. She sighed. “Thank you.”

“Sure,” Oliver whispered. He kissed her forehead before he turned to Tommy. “Come on, Buddy, we prepare some leg compresses for mommy, okay?”

“Can I stay here with her?”

Oliver looked at Felicity briefly. He was sure that if she was sick now, it wasn’t long until the rest of the family would fall sick, too. Besides, Tommy was the quietest of the kids, not the most content, but the quietest. He certainly wouldn’t disturb Felicity’s rest.

“Okay, Buddy,” he agreed, “but let mommy sleep.”

Tommy nodded. “Okay.”

As he strolled to the door, Oliver looked back over her shoulder to see Tommy climbing onto the bed to Felicity. He smiled as he walked out and headed to the stairs, intending to get some tea and water for Felicity before he’d prepare the compresses. Tommy still wanted to be a doctor one day, so it certainly wouldn’t hurt if he gained some experience already. Besides, his mommy being sick was the best motivation possible. She was his favorite person in the world after all.

“Hey, I figured it was best to get Felicity some-“

“Tea and water,” Raisa finished his sentence, gesturing towards the kitchen island where a Thermos bottle of tea and a bottle of water as well as a glass and a mug were already waiting. “I thought so, too.”

Oliver smiled and went over to Raisa, kissing her cheek. “You are the best.”

“You are taking good care of her,” Raisa replied. “I am just helping a little.”

“You do more than just a little,” Oliver assured her. “I will bring her the tea and the water and prepare some leg compresses.”

“The soup is ready in case Felicity gets hungry,” Raisa told him. “I am going to take Adelaide and Camille out on a walk before Emmeline comes back from school. Should Thomas come with us?”

“I don’t think you will get him away from his mommy,” Oliver replied with a chuckled as it had taken him a moment to realize that she meant Tommy. “Where is Tommy Merlyn by the way?”

“Mr. Thomas meets with Mr. Roy,” Raisa answered.

Oliver nodded. “Right. He told me. I forgot with everything that is going on and-“

When he heard Felicity’s phone ringing, Oliver stopped. He gestured behind him, and Raisa nodded with a smile. Oliver quickly went to the front door where he had put Felicity’s purse, opened it and pulled her phone outside. They had the kind of marriage where he was allowed to just take things from her purse and answer her phone. She’d do the same for him. Besides, if it was a call from work, it probably wouldn’t hurt to tell her assistant Emily to take care of it.

As soon as Oliver saw the caller ID, he felt his stomach tightening. He had always loved when Donna had called since he had found a second mother in her. She had even stood by him and comforted him when he had felt lost in the middle of Felicity’s first pregnancy depression. Since she had learned the truth about Oliver being the Arrow, their relationship had been tense though to say the least. Donna couldn’t get used to the idea easily, and she might even see the killer in him that he used to be. She definitely had trouble to still see the son-in-law she had grown to love so much. He hoped that, with time, she’d be able to do so again.

Taking in a deep breath, Oliver took the call. “Hi, Donna.”

There was a moment of hesitation. “Oliver. Hi.”

Oliver bit down on his tongue, unsure of what he should say now. Since Donna didn’t speak either, he figured he should say something after all.

“Did you want to talk to Felicity?”

He knew the question was stupid since she probably wouldn’t have called if she didn’t want to talk to Felicity. Things between them were just awkward since she had told him that she had almost asked him to leave his family, a wish he would have denied if she had actually voiced it.

“Yes,” Donna replied. She cleared her throat before she added, “We wanted to have a coffee together before her lunch appointment with God knows whom. I am waiting at Jitters, but she’s not here. If she forgot her phone, I will try calling at work and-“

“No, she’s sick and got home,” Oliver interrupted her quickly before she could hang up.

“Oh. Can I talk to her?”

“She’s asleep, sorry.”

There was a long moment of silence. Oliver pushed his hand into the pocket of his pants. He wondered if Donna thought he was lying. If she thought he was the coldblooded killer the Hood had been painted to be, he didn’t want to imagine what she thought he might do to Felicity. One angry word and he’d explode, hurting her and the kids physically?

“Should I wake her up?”

“No,” Donna replied quickly. “No, of course not. You are right. She should sleep and rest. Just tell her I called and ask her to call me back if she feels better.”

“I will,” Oliver replied. His hand tightened around Felicity’s phone for a moment. “Bye, Donna. Thanks for calling.”

“Bye, Oliver.”

With a sigh, Oliver ended the call and pushed Felicity’s phone back into her purse. His chest felt tightened as it always did after talking to Donna lately. He hoped that she could accept who he was. Even if it took time, he hoped eventually she’d understand.

Oliver went back into the kitchen and grabbed the tea and water. While approaching the bedroom, Oliver could already hear Tommy’s voice as he told his mother the story from his favorite book about an elephant trying to find a perfect pet for itself. Oliver didn’t know how many times he and Felicity had read that story to Tommy already, and he still wanted to hear it whenever he got to pick the bedtime story.

Smiling, Oliver leaned into the frame of the door and watched the two. Felicity’s head was resting on a pillow in Tommy’s lap. She held the pink giraffe Tommy had had before under her arm. Tommy was stroking his fingers over Felicity’s hair soothingly.

When Oliver stepped further into the room, Tommy looked up. “Can I finish the story?”

Oliver smiled. “Of course. Daddy is going to prepare the compresses now. In the meantime, you can tell the rest of the story. Then we go downstairs and let mommy sleep a little, okay?”

“Yes,” Tommy replied, going back to stroking his hand over his mommy’s head. “Where was I?”

“He’s scared of the mouse,” Felicity answered in a raspy whisper.

“Right,” Tommy replied. “So, Elvis Elephant doesn’t want a mouse.”

Smiling, Oliver went over to the bathroom en suite. While he was preparing the compresses, he listened to Tommy telling the rest of the story. He doubted he had ever heard his son talk more or more eloquent than in this moment. His mommy was just the perfect motivation. Oliver did as slowly as possible, giving Tommy the time he needed to actually finish the story.

“Sleep tight, Mommy.”

Oliver took that as his prompt to go back into the bedroom. He lifted the blanket off Felicity’s legs, and immediately she grumbled something, pushing her feet closer to her chest.

“I’ll hurry,” he promised. “These are going to help you, though.”

He wrapped the compresses around her calves before he pulled the blanket back into place, making sure she was wrapped into warmth as much as possible. When Felicity sighed sleepily in response, he smiled. For a long moment, he just watched her. Eventually he leaned down and kissed her temple.

“Come on, Buddy,” he whispered to Tommy when he straightened back up. “We let mommy sleep a little.”

Oliver lifted Felicity’s head off Tommy’s lap carefully, so he could slide away under her and crawl off the bed. When Oliver rested Felicity’s head back down against the pillows, she murmured some words in her sleep. Oliver stroked his fingertips over her cheek gently.

“Can I kiss mommy goodnight too?”

Oliver nodded. “Sure, Buddy.”

Tommy crawled onto the mattress once more to kiss Felicity’s cheek. Oliver smiled at the sight. When he lifted Tommy into his arms and kissed his cheek, the boy still looked at his mother.

“Let’s let mommy sleep a little. She’s going to be better soon.”

“Can I draw her a card?”

Oliver smiled. “Absolutely. It’s a great idea. We should all draw get well cards for mommy.”

“Can you write something on it for me?” Tommy asked.

“Sure,” Oliver replied, closing the door behind them. “What do you want me to write?”

“ _Get well soon_.”

Oliver chuckled. “Simple, yet perfect. That’s why I love you, Buddy.”

“And you have to write _I love you, Mommy_.”

Oliver smiled, giving him a short nod of his head. “Absolutely.”

“And that _I miss your hugs and kisses_.”

“Daddy can give you hugs and kisses.”

“But it’s not the same.”

Oliver cocked his head, smiling at him sympathetically. “Mommy does it better, right?”

Tommy nodded. “Mommy does everything better.”

“Oh really?” Oliver chuckled. “Does mommy also bake better?”

“No.” Tommy laughed amusedly. “But everything else she does better than you.”

Oliver smiled. If there was one person that loved Felicity as unconditionally as he did, then it was Tommy. There was no way Oliver couldn’t love his son all the more for that.


	271. Love your family

When the doorbell rang, Felicity got up from the couch to open. She chuckled when she saw Addie already rolling her way there. At seven and a half months, she knew the connection between the doorbell and visitors. Lately, she had also grown more mobile, using rolling movements to get everywhere she wanted to go. At times, she was also pushing up her butt, trying to get into a crawling position, but she hadn’t gotten the knack of it yet.

“Come here, Sweetie,” Felicity said. She lifted Addie into her arms and kissed her cheek. “Let’s see who’s at the door, right?”

“Ba-da,” Addie said, pointing at the door.

“Yeah, I know there is someone at the door. We’re gonna open now and see who pays us a visit,” she said in a cheerful tone. “Do you wanna bet who’s there? I’d say it’s Tommy who doesn’t want to help Uncle Tommy anymore and rather wants to spend time with us girls, don’t you think?”

Felicity adjusted Addie position on her lip a little, shielding her against the cold air that would come inside if she opened the door. They were both still recovering from their colds in the last weeks, and Felicity didn’t want for Addie to catch just another cold again already. They had been lucky that the other kids hadn’t been infected, and Felicity didn’t want to risk that now. One sick baby was enough for the month. The little girl seemed to be dissatisfied with the adjusted position though. She released a grumpy cry, trying to move on her mother’s arm, but Felicity kept her in a tight grip and opened the door.

“Oh, who’s grumpy here?” Thea asked immediately, looking at her niece.

“This little cutie-pie here is a little grumpy because she can’t open the door herself,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “Come in.”

Thea smiled and stepped in. Addie was already reaching out her arms for her, releasing another grumpy sound when Felicity didn’t just hand her over. She bobbed Addie up and down on her hip, keeping her from whining unhappily, while Thea got out of her coat. She stroked her hands over her baby bump as she turned around. She reached out her hands and lifted Addie into her arms, kissing her rosy cheek, looking at her little niece with her eyes filled with love and excitement. Seeing a baby just reminded Thea of what she’d have in a couple of weeks, too. Felicity knew that feeling of excitement and nervousness. She had experienced it too when she had ben pregnant with Emmy. Every time she had seen Baby Sara, she had been reminded of how close she was to experience the same joy Lyla had with her little girl.

“Only a little bit more than six weeks,” Thea said with a smile.

 “Don’t say it too loud. Unlike your brother, the next generation of Queens apparently tends to be early rather than late.” When Addie squealed, Felicity chuckled and turned towards her. “What are you so amused about? You’ve been the worst of all of them.”

Addie squealed once more, dropping her head to Thea’s shoulder. Thea smiled and stroked her hand up and down the baby’s back.

“I will just double down on thinking of this little one as a Harper than.”

“Good idea,” Felicity replied and winked. “Come on, we go to the living room. It’s warmer there. Do you want something to drink? Or some cookies? Oliver and the kids baked yesterday. I wasn’t invited of course. I was allowed to take care of Addie… and drink wine… which was actually nice, so I probably shouldn’t complain… anyway, the cookies are delicious.”

“No, thanks. I don’t need anything right now.”

They sat down on the large couch in the living room. Thea kept Addie on her lap as much as that was possible with the huge baby bump. She angled her head forward and pressed her lips against her youngest niece’s head before she smelled at her. Felicity smiled at the sight. Becoming a mother for the first time had been a wonderful and yet frightening experience.

“Is Roy over at Tommy’s to help with moving in?”

“Tommy? Not Thomas?”

Felicity chuckled. “I gave up on it. We have Tommy and Baby Tommy now. Or Tommy and Tommy… I mean… I am sure when I ask Oliver to help Tommy go to the toilet or suggest a boys’ evening with Tommy at Verdant or any other club he won’t ask which one.”

“Probably not.” Thea chuckled. “And yes, he’s with Tommy. I wanted to go too, but Roy thinks I should rather rest. Like I can’t even carry a pillow or something.”

Felicity smiled. “Hey, enjoy it as long as it lasts. When that little nugget is on the world, getting some rest will seem like the wildest dream.”

“Honestly, I can’t wait,” Thea replied with a sigh. “I am just worried about the birth. Is it very bad?”

“Not bad enough to keep me from having three more.” Felicity smiled. “I basically missed two births because of the anesthesia, but I don’t remember any pain from the other two births. I mean know that it hurt, but it’s not the part I remember. That really is just a distant memory. I You could let yourself be abducted or have the baby in a stuck elevator, too. It distracts from the pain of birth.”

Thea chuckled. “Thanks, but I think I’d rather stick with the birth level for beginners.”

“I cannot hold that against you,” Felicity replied with a smile since she certainly would have wished for easier births too. She just hadn’t been asked and just put in these terribly messy situations whenever her babies had been born. Still smiling, she watched Thea for a moment before she asked, “Are you scared, not only about the birth itself but about it all as a whole?”

“Sure,” Thea admitted in a whisper. “I wish my mom was here to give me advice. I know she had her mistakes, and she certainly didn’t do everything right. She loved Ollie and me without any buts, though. She even gave her life for us which I guess is the ultimate sacrifice. I think that’s what makes the best moms, right? Not the death, but loving your kids without any buts. Right?”

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied. She slid a little closer to Thea and took her hand between both of hers. “I am sure that, if your mother was here, she’d tell you that she is incredibly proud of how you are handling this and that she couldn’t be happier for you. She’d tell you that having a baby is the greatest adventure you will ever experience, that there will be ups and downs, but it will all be worth it. She’d tell you that there will be days that you doubt you are doing things right and that you will doubt everything you are doing, and she’d advise you to, on those days, focus on the good days and lean on your husband. She’d tell you that parenting is nothing you can do all alone, but that leaning on the people you love, your family and friends, is not a bad thing because the truth is that you just aren’t alone in this. She’d also tell you that you can always come to her when you need her. Not only because your mother can’t tell you that, but also because you are my family and I love you, I am telling you this now. You can always come to me when you need me. No matter what day or what time, no matter what reason or whatever, I am always here for you. Okay?”

Thea smiled at Felicity through the tears, and Felicity felt tears welling in her own eyes. She remembered how hard it had been for Oliver when she had been pregnant, and he didn’t have his parents to lean on. It had been especially hard when she had been pregnant with Tommy, Baby Tommy obviously. With his best childhood friend and his dad gone, having a little boy had felt like a huge challenge. Oliver had trusted her with his fears and leaned on her, though, and that was how they had made it through.

“I really miss my mom, you know?” Thea whispered and lowered her eyes for a moment. When she looked up again, she squeezed Felicity’s hand gently. “Having a big sister to turn to is great, though.”

Felicity smiled and stroked a strand of Thea’s hair behind her ear. She remembered all the stories Oliver had told her about little Speedy, remembered her own memories of the confused teen Thea had been and the fierce warrior she had turned into. Now she was also going to become a mommy, and Felicity knew with all the experience of parents she had, the good and the bad ones, she’d be an amazing mom.

“This only makes it more difficult, though.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows, confused about what she meant. “Hm?”

Thea took in a deep breath, wiping away a tear that had fallen. “I… uhm… Roy and I talked a lot about our baby’s godparents. We’ve been talking about it for months actually. All your talk about godparents being the baby’s guardian angels on earth as you used to call me just touched me, and I started feeling the same way. Hence, choosing the godparents meant a lot to me. Since Roy doesn’t have any family, we always knew it should be Ollie. He’s my big brother and in a lot of ways he’s been a brother to Roy too. Then we discussed whether we should make Laurel or you the godmother and decided for you.”

Felicity nodded slowly, seeing the hesitation in Thea’s eyes. “But?”

“Well-“ Thea stopped for a moment. “Well, with Tommy being back, I would actually like Ollie and Tommy to be godparents.”

Felicity smiled. “That sounds great. I am sure your brothers will be happy. Oliver and Tommy being responsible for a baby together… I am sure you will have your hands full with that kid.”

“So you… aren’t mad?”

Felicity chuckled. “God, no. Why would I be mad? Really, if you had asked Oliver and me, I would have been beyond happy. Yet, I might have taken you aside and told you that, whenever Oliver and I picked godparents, we made sure they came from two different families. You have twice as much babysitters you can emotionally blackmail into taking the kids because they chose to be responsible for it and help raise it. At the beginning, it will be unthinkable to give your baby away for even just five minutes, but you will soon find how much you need babysitters from time to time to enjoy some quality togetherness with your husband.”

Thea pursed her lips for a moment, cocking her head. Felicity looked back innocently. She was almost a hundred percent sure that she knew the question that would follow now.

“So, you and Ollie had sex whenever you ‘really, really, really’ needed a babysitter?”

Felicity puckered her lips. “Cuteness mode activated,” Oliver would say if he was here.

“How do you think we had time to make four babies?”

“Ugh.” Thea squeezed her eyes shut. “Really, I don’t want to think about that anymore. I used to be amused about that, especially because you always blushed and felt so embarrassed about it, but whenever my brother and sex are mentioned in the same sentence now, it’s such an ugh-moment.”

Felicity chuckled. “Admittedly, if I had a brother, I’d probably feel the same way. Since I love to turn things into the positive, just focus on the thought that from now on, whenever we will babysit your baby, he will have to think about you and Roy having fun.”

“I am sure he will deny that we are having sex at all.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Felicity replied and grinned. “I will remind him of it. It will be my pleasure.”

Thea chuckled. “Ollie really wouldn’t need any enemies with how much of a tease you are.”

“I just can’t help it.” Felicity chuckled and squeezed Thea’s hand. “So, how about I get us some hot chocolate with extra whipping cream and we talk a little.”

“Sounds great,” Thea replied. “I am going to cuddle with this little sweetheart here in the meantime.”

Felicity smiled. “If you get her to lie down for her nap, I leave the slice of mousse au chocolate cake to you.”

Thea looked at Addie without hesitation. “Okay, Sweetie, let’s go upstairs and put you to bed, right?”

“I knew mousse au chocolate cake was the right motivation.”


	272. New home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized I completely forgot to update last week. :D

“There is going to be a surprise party, right?”

“What? No,” Oliver replied. “We thought it was better to spend the evening in quiet, just the seven of us. I mean you just moved here and with the new school and everything, you can certainly need some rest this weekend. We are just going to watch a movie and order takeout. You can pick both, movie and food, and we-“

“Dad?”

Oliver still kept his eyes ahead of him. “Hm?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you are a bad liar?”

The key already in the lock, Oliver turned his head back over his shoulder to look at William. While he was trying to give him a look that said _Why would you think that?_ his oldest son looked back at him with his eyebrows perked up and an amused grin playing on his lips. Oliver knew that there was no way for him to convince William of the opposite.

“Felicity might have mentioned it a few times,” Oliver mumbled, “just because I told her I spilled a latte on my laptop when there were actually bullet holes in there or because I gave her a drug in a syringe to test and said it was an energy drink.”

William looked at him incredulously. “Are you kidding?”

“No, but those are long stories and, like you suspected, there are guests waiting for you in there,” Oliver replied. “Just pretend to be surprised. Tommy will be disappointed if he finds out you knew already.”

“Uncle Tommy or Brother Tommy?”

“Both of them probably,” Oliver replied with a grin, “though I have to say that Brother Tommy sounds like he is a monk.”

“Baby Tommy sounds like he is barely a year old, though.”

“True,” Oliver admitted. He chuckled. “Anyway, it would mean a lot to your siblings, Uncle Tommy and Felicity if you acted surprised.”

William smiled. “I will do my best.”

“Thanks.”

“Oh, Dad?”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Yes?”

“Will I ever get the stories behind the bullet-riddled laptop and the drug in the syringe?”

“You will,” Oliver said. “I promise.”

Oliver smiled as he turned back to the door and unlocked it. Today was a big day. It wasn’t only William’s sixteenth birthday, but it was also the day William would finally move in with them. Starting on Monday, he would go to the Garrison Slate School of Starling City, a prestigious private school that had a great science program, so moving here just was his best choice. Oliver had picked up William from San Francisco to get the rest of his stuff here.

“You go ahead,” Oliver suggested when the door was unlocked.

He gestured for William to get inside. William smiled, stepped into the dark house and switched on the light.

“Surprise!” everyone yelled, getting out of their hideouts. They applauded for the birthday boy and immediately started singing, “ _Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear William, happy birthday to you._ ”

Once the song was over, Tommy and Emmy ran over to their brother and hugged him tightly, wishing him a happy birthday once more. Emmy tried to pull him right to the living room where his presents were waiting, but William told her, with the patience of the best big brother, that his presents had to wait until everyone had congratulated him. Emmy was disappointed since she loved presents, but she agreed.

Millie stepped closer to William eventually. She lifted her hands to make him pick her up, and William did. He kissed her cheek and accepted the tight hug she gave him. Eventually, followed and finally Felicity with Addie on her hip. Felicity hugged her William tightly and wished him a happy birthday. William thanked her before he took some extra time to greet his youngest sister and little goddaughter.

After Felicity had pulled the kids aside, telling them to make rooms for the other congratulants, she stepped next to him. Oliver wrapped his arm around her automatically, his hand resting on her hip. His thumb snuck under her blouse and enjoyed the softness of her skin. When Addie released a whiney sound, he leaned over and kiss her forehead, using the opportunity to brush his lips against Felicity briefly when he pulled back again. Felicity smiled at him in response.

“Did you tell William, or did he find out?” Felicity asked as they watched everyone congratulating William.

Oliver faltered for a moment before he chuckled. “How did you know?”

Felicity smiled. “I just knew.”

“Of course you did.”

 

 

Oliver smiled, leaning against the frame of the door and watching the party. When he had come back from the island, he had hates parties. Sure, he had gone to some for his mother’s parties and to some of the parties at Verdant, to the party in Max Fuller’s club and of course to the welcome party Tommy had planned for him. He had hated those parties, each one of them actually. He had only gone there because it had been necessary to maintain the image of a spoilt billionaire.

Letting Felicity into his life changed everything for him, though. His love for her made him reconnect with a part of himself he had long forgotten. His love for her turned him into a better person, and it made him open up to the world and to life in a way he hadn’t thought he could after his five years away. It had made him want to reach for more than just saving the city. It had made him dream of having more, so Oliver had slowly expanded the part of the world he was comfortable with which was the small room between him and Felicity until it had grown to this. Parties were the only way they all got together now.

Still smiling, Oliver took a look around the room to see what his family had expanded to by now like he needed to reassure himself that they were all real. John, Ronnie and Quentin stood near the fireplace, drinking beer and chatting. Thea, Laurel and Caitlin were sitting on the couch, huddling together and whispering, while they were shooting brief looks to where Iris and Barry – who Oliver had heard were playing with the idea of getting married sometimes soon – were sitting on the floor and playing with the two youngest family members, Connor and Addie. Lyla and Donna just came from the kitchen, their glasses filled with new champagne. Roy played some board game with Emmy and Sara. Felicity and Cisco stood bent over Cisco’s tablet, probably discussing plans for the new hideout while Tommy Merlyn stood close by, looking back and forth between them with an expression in his face that Oliver knew all too well. It meant he didn’t understand a single word of what was said. It was probably the reason why he went over to where the younger Tommy was sitting on the floor with his remote for the toy helicopter that chased Millie, who squealed and giggled and tried to find protection behind Uncle Tommy’s legs.

Oliver frowned, straightening up. He left his position at the door and took another look around the room. His frown deepened when he figured that someone was indeed missing. When he couldn’t find William, he went to the kitchen to check if he was there, but he wasn’t. Turning around to head back to the living room, he stopped when Donna entered the kitchen.

Immediately, Oliver felt himself growing tense. His relationship with Donna was still difficult after she had found out that he had been the Hood and the Arrow. Donna mistrusted him, especially regarding her daughter and her grandchildren. Oliver tried his best to give her the room she needed. He loved Donna like a second mother, and he missed her. He knew she wasn’t ready to go back to the way things had been between them, though.

“Hey,” he said. “Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Donna replied with a smile. “I was actually about to ask you the same thing. You seemed a little… I don’t know how to call it… when you left the living room.”

“Oh, I was just wondering where William has gone,” Oliver said. He closed his eyes for a moment and shook his head. “I know nothing happened to him, but… do you know the feeling that, when your kids aren’t right around you, you worry about them? Not necessarily in thinking someone hurt them physically, but just in thinking they might not be okay?”

Donna smiled. “Of course I do. For most of Felicity’s life I had to just hope she was okay since she barely ever called, and I knew I couldn’t just go and visit her because she would have hated that. Since Felicity and I grew closer, I always worry when she doesn’t call me at least once a week, though. I worry that work is just too much for her or that she had trouble with the kids or maybe even trouble in her marriage. Now that I know what else you do at night, it’s even worse. I always worry if something happened to her. I worry that someone from your pasts comes and hurts her. I wonder that one of the bad guys you are chasing finds her and hurts her. I worry that she is losing the man that she loved and the man she chose to be the father of her kids because I know it will destroy her. Felicity knows how hard it is to lose a dad, so it’s the last she would want for her kids. That is why it is so hard to forgive you.”

Oliver lowered his eyes to his feet and pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants. “I know.”

“Really?” Donna asked, stepping a little closer. “Because I hate feeling that way. When Felicity told me that you were together and later on when she told me that you proposed, I was so happy. You might have a messy life cycle, but you seemed like a perfectly normal guy. It was great because that was exactly that I wanted for my daughter. I know what it’s like to be left by the man you love and the man you trusted your life with because the police is chasing him. I don’t want that for my daughter, and I don’t want that for my grandkids.”

“I understand that, Donna,” Oliver replied honestly and looked at her. “I understand that, and I accept that you think that way because I respect you and because I love you. You are underestimating Felicity, though. She chose the life as a vigilante long before she chose me or before I chose her. She wants to make this world a better place, and she has the power to do so. Felicity has more energy and more strength than anyone I have met. Yet, she is so at peace with herself and with life, I… I learned a lot from her. I learned how to live and how to love. I can’t deny that I once was the person you saw in me. When I came back from the island, I might have been. I fell in love with Felicity and I became a better person, though. She is the reason I am the person, the husband and the dad I am today. It’s all thanks to Felicity, and you can be sure that I will always do whatever is in my power to get back to her each and every night, and I will always do my best to keep her safe and sound and make her happy.”

Donna looked at him for a long moment before she smiled warmly. She gestured up and down his body and whispered, “That- that is the man I got to know, and the man I trusted my daughter with.”

“I am still him,” Oliver promised. He approached Donna slowly and kissed her cheek before he added, “You just gotta give me a chance to prove it to you.”

Donna nodded slowly. “Regarding being convinced that you are still that man, I am at eighty-five to fifteen now. I am trying to make it hundred to zero, but I am just not there yet.”

Oliver shot her a brief smile. “I will convince you to make it a hundred to zero one day.”

Not saying another word and not giving Donna the chance to reply anything to that, Oliver fled the kitchen. After a moment of hesitation, he went upstairs. This was one of the moments that called for some quiet. Since he couldn’t just go into the living room and snatch Felicity from there to spend time alone with her, time all alone it was.

Oliver was so determined to get to the bedroom and just take five minutes to take some deep breaths, he just focused on his bedroom door and almost missed that the door to William’s room was open. He had already walked past his son’s room when it caught up to him. He turned around and walked back, knocking quietly.

“Yes?”

Oliver pushed the door further open and leaned into the frame of the door at seeing his son sitting at his desk and staring at the ceiling. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” William replied with a sigh. “Just thinking.”

“Do you already regret moving in here?”

“No, of course not.” William looked at him. “I am just worried about mom.”

Oliver smiled. “I know she was sad. Every parent is sad when their kids move out, though, no matter how old they are. Your mother knows that this new school is the right decision.”

“I know,” William replied. “I still don’t like the thought that I hurt her by moving out.”

“Which only proves how mature you are already,” Oliver told him. “You just have to call her regularly and visit her regularly like you did these last years for Felicity and me. That you moved in with us doesn’t mean that you left your mom. She understands that. She just needs time to adjust to the changed situation. She’s been raising you alone for most of your life, and until now, you spent the most of your time at her home. It needs adjustment for all of us, but it’s a good change for us at least. Your mother knows it’s what you want right now, so it’s okay.”

William nodded slowly and sighed. He looked at the ceiling once more like he was trying to think Oliver’s words through once more. Eventually, he turned his head to his father and frowned.

“What are you doing here?” he asked. “Were you looking for me?”

Oliver sighed. “I was looking for you when I ran into Donna.”

“She still hasn’t forgiven you?”

“No,” Oliver replied and pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He shrugged his shoulders. “I can’t hold it against her. Even I didn’t want myself anywhere near Felicity when I fell in love with her because I thought my life would only infect hers with darkness. I pushed her away for months before she had enough of it.”

William chuckled. “Why am I not surprised that she just didn’t want to hear any more of it?”

Oliver smiled. “Because you already know that Felicity is the most badass person on the planet, and she doesn’t take shit from anyone.”

“She didn’t believe your lies either.”

“No, she didn’t,” Oliver replied, “though she never actually told me. She just… she just looked at me. I swear it elicited the first honest smile from me since I was back from my five years away. I was used to women being smitten by me, and she just saw right through it.”

William grinned. “You are so in love with her.”

“I love her. I am in love with her. I have a giant crush on her,” Oliver replied. “With Felicity, it’s all at once. Just thinking about her, I feel calmer.”

He put his hand on his heart, feeling his heartbeat slowing down and his muscles relaxing. He loved Felicity with a depth that still seemed impossible for him a lot of times. He didn’t know where all that love came from or how it fit into him, but it was there. He loved her as much as you could love a human being, just like he loved every single one of his five kids.

“Do you want me to tell me more about her?” William asked. “You still owe me the story about the laptop and the drug, and maybe we can steal some time before we have to go back.”

Oliver smiled. “Are you sure you want to hear it? Felicity says I am a giant sap.”

“I have already noticed that,” William replied and made some room on the bed. “So, come on.”

Oliver’s smile widened. “For the record, I did warn you.”


	273. Queens' tradition

The jarring sound of Oliver’s phone didn’t just wake Felicity up. It more like ripped her out of her sleep and brought back the headache she had had all day. It actually came back with a force that she almost felt like her head was exploding. With a groan, she pulled the fluffy pillow away from under her head and pushed the fabric to her face, trying to muffle the unpleasant sounds. It didn’t help much, though, as the ringtone seemed to get right through the fabric and force itself into her head where it found the most sensitive of her nerves and started stabbing like the sharpest knife would.

“Oliver,” Felicity said under the pillow. “Your phone.”

Felicity stroked her hand up and down his back, scratching her short fingernails over his skin slightly. The only thing it did to Oliver was making him grumble. The sound vibrated through his chest, and, given that Oliver lay on top of her, it echoed through hers too. Oliver turned his head, pushing his nose against the top of her chest for a moment, before he rested his cheek back against her skin with a sleepy sigh. His arms tightened around her waist.

Usually Felicity would enjoy the way he was snuggling up to her even more, still so sleepy. She still remembered the nights that, no matter what time she would wake up, Oliver would be already already or still awake. His trauma had kept him from finding peaceful sleep for so long that it was still a nice thing to see how comfortably sleepy he was now. Sleeping through the nights as well as sleeping without nightmares had been impossible for him for so long, it still felt like a miracle now. Anyway, her headache made it hard to enjoy that right now.

“Oliver, your phone,” Felicity repeated once more, tapping her fingers against his sides lightly.

“I’m sleepy,” Oliver mumbled, “and I don’t want to-“

“Oliver, please, I have a headache,” Felicity hissed.

The words had come out a lot more angrily than she had intended them to be. Within the break of a second, Oliver rolled off of her and the jarring sound stopped, and silence filled the room. Felicity tightened the pillow on her face for a short moment, regretting the sharpness of her voice. When Oliver’s hand came to rest on her upper thigh, stroking soothingly, she lifted the pillow away and looked at Oliver through the darkness.

“Sorry,” she whispered.

“It’s fine,” he replied gently, his voice lowered to a soft whisper. His thumb rubbed soothing circles against the skin of her thigh. “Should I get you something for your headache?”

“I can go and-“

“I’ll do that for you.”

He maneuvered himself over her, kissing the tip of her nose briefly, before he rolled out of bed on her side and walked over to the en-suite bathroom. He didn’t close the door behind him completely, but pushed it closed enough for her not to be bothered when he switched on the light. Felicity squeezed her eyes shut, massaging her temples.

It wasn’t long until Oliver came back, as glass with water in one hand and two pills in the other. Felicity didn’t take painkillers often. They made her feel like her head was filled with cotton wool rather than a brain. If her headache was bad enough to snap at Oliver, she knew it was time to allow painkillers!Felicity to come out. Oliver would certainly enjoy it as he loved teasing her about the things she said when she was under the influence of painkillers.

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered when Oliver handed her both, the glass and the painkillers. She watched him climb into bed and sat down next to her, facing her. “Who called?”

While Felicity was taking the painkillers, Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I didn’t recognize the number, and it wasn’t saved on my phone. Probably someone just dialed the wrong number.”

Felicity nodded slowly before she put the glass onto her nightstand. She crawled over the mattress towards Oliver and sat down in his lap. With her legs loosely wrapped around his hips and her fingertips stroking through his short, scratchy stubble, Felicity straightened up enough to brush her lips against Oliver’s in a gentle kiss.

“I am really sorry,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“I know that,” Oliver replied. He pulled her closer against him until her chest was pressed against his, and her head rested against his shoulder. He rubbed his hands up and down her back comfortingly and kissed the side of her neck. “You had a lot on your plate lately. With William moving in here and the still tense situation with your mom, then Queen Inc and now your long nights spent with Cisco.”

Felicity quickly straightened up. “It’s not what you think.”

“Really?” he asked. “Because I could have sworn you were working on setting up the new lair together.”

“In that case, it’s exactly what you think it is.”

Oliver chuckled and tightened his arms around her once more until she snuggled back to him with his arms wrapped around her. He turned them and lay down, taking her with him, so they lay in the reserved position of how they had slept before. Felicity rested on top of Oliver, her head against his chest, so she could listen to the beat of his heart. She wasn’t the slightest bit surprised that Oliver enjoyed lying on top of her like that. His heartbeat calmed her down.

“Let’s try to-“

As soon as his phone started ringing again, Oliver turned them around. He pushed Felicity’s back into the mattress and reached out his hand for the phone, taking the call and making the jarring sound stop.

“Hello?”

He rested his head back on the top of Felicity’s chest. Felicity stroked her fingertips through Oliver’s short hair, but it wasn’t long until Oliver suddenly tensed. Only a second later, he was sitting up in bed.

“What happened?”

Felicity frowned, reaching out her hand and turning on the small lamp on Oliver’s nightstand. She propped herself up onto her elbows, watching Oliver’s worried face. His eyes were on hers intently, and his hand was holding onto her thigh tightly.

“So they are okay?”

Felicity’s frown deepened, and she sat up, putting her hand to his thigh. They were on the top of emergency contacts for the Diggles, Thea and Roy and now Tommy too. They also shared the first place on the list for her mom and Quentin with Laurel. If something had happened to either of them, they were the first to be called.

“No, no, that’s great,” Oliver replied, a smile spreading on his lips now which only confused her more. “Congratulations.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow, cocking her head. Oliver grinned at her, his grip on her thigh loosening. He stroked his fingers up and down her leg as he listened to whatever the caller had to say to him.

“No, that’s- that’s alright,” he said eventually. “Thanks for calling. We’ll come over to the hospital tomorrow as soon as we got our kids into their coats and- No, that’s fine. Thanks for calling again.”

As Oliver hung up, he sighed contently. His smile was filled with love and warmth.

“Really, it’s a little bit creepy when you look at me like that after saying something about the hospital. That is unless it’s Malcolm Merlyn dying in the hospital, and you want to tell me that I get to stop the machines on him.”

Oliver cocked his head, gently touching her face. Felicity knew that he knew how much she was still suffering from knowing that Malcolm Merlyn had escaped them and was running around wherever he was. He also knew what a dark path she was ready to go if she ever saw him again.

“Yeah, that would have been too good to be true,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver cleared his throat. “That was Roy.”

“Thea had her baby?” Felicity asked, jumping to the conclusion that it was the only reason why he would call them at this time. She immediately understood Oliver’s worry at the start and the fact that it had turned into joy so quickly. “Really?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes. They got into the hospital late this afternoon, and it took until an hour ago for the baby to be born. It’s been a little early-“

“Almost four weeks which is a lot, but it’s still a lot later than Addie, so it should probably be okay. It is okay, right?”

“Thea and the baby are fine,” Oliver replied. “She is exhausted of course, but the baby was checked through, and they are both perfectly healthy.”

“Thank god,” Felicity said, holding her hand to her heart. She had a little too much experience with babies being born early and dramatically. “The baby is following this new generation of Queen-babies with its timing, though. Besides, ‘it’ sounds terrible, so, what’s the sex? Girl? Boy?”

Oliver faltered. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“I- I forgot to ask.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment before she chuckled. “Okay, I will let you get away with it because we were just woken up in the middle of the night though, honestly, Oliver, who doesn’t ask for the baby’s sex?”

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed her and crawled closer. He put his hand on her face and gently pushed her down into the pillow. “You took painkillers. You are sleepy, and you can’t think clearly. It’s okay, though. You can go back to sleep.”

Felicity chuckled, but it ended in a long yawn when she realized how tired she was. The painkillers seemed to be working their dark magic on her. Closing her eyes with a sigh, she wrapped her arms around Oliver’s neck.

“Okay, let’s sleep,” she agreed. “We can fight tomorrow.”

“Or we can skip the fight completely.”

“Tomorrow,” Felicity said with a yawn, sleep already pulling at her.

 

 

“He is so beautiful,” Felicity said for the umpteenth time.

“He is, isn’t he?” Thea replied, unable to take her eyes off her baby boy. “I can’t look away from him.”

Felicity smiled, knowing exactly that a feeling like that wouldn’t cease even with the forth baby. She sat down on the edge of the bed, so she could take an even closer look at her little nephew. Baby Tommy and Millie were both kneeling between Thea’s spread legs, looking at the sleeping, little boy too. Their eyes were wide, taking him in intently like it was the first time they got to see a baby.

“Auntie Thea?” Tommy asked.

“Yes?”

“What’s his name?”

“Yeah, you haven’t told us yet,” Felicity noticed. “Then again we didn’t know he was a boy until like three minutes ago because someone forgot to ask about it.”

She shot a look at Oliver, who was standing by the window next to Roy, bobbing Addie up and down on his hip. He looked back at her with a slightly annoyed, but mostly amused look on his face. When he winked at her only a moment later, Felicity smiled, though.

“Well, Roy forgot to tell Ollie, so he is to be blamed too,” Thea said, looking at her husband.

“Oh, no, he is excused,” Felicity said. “He was distracted by his happy daddy feelings. Oliver doesn’t have a similar excuse.”

“You hear that?” Roy asked, looking at Oliver. “I am excused.”

Oliver shot Felicity a look, and she smiled innocently in response.

“So, what’s his name?” Tommy asked once more.

“Well,” Thea started. She looked at Roy, who pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants and smiled brightly. When he nodded his head, Thea looked back at Tommy. “Uncle Roy and I decided some time ago already that we want to call him Robert.”

“Robert,” Millie repeated.

“Yes.” Thea smiled. “Do you know who else had the name Robert?”

“I do,” Tommy replied immediately, nodding his head.

Thea chuckled. “Yes, I know. And who else had that name, the one you got it for too?”

“Grandpa Robert,”

Thea smiled. “Exactly.”

“And how will you call him?”

“Either Rob or Robbie,” Thea replied. “We haven’t decided that yet.”

Tommy nodded and looked at his tiny cousin for a moment before he asked, “And what’s his other names?”

Felicity smiled. Tommy wasn’t really talkative. Since Emmy had been invited for a sleepover at Deepa’s place and William was visiting his mother, they weren’t here to ask all the questions. It was why Tommy had to ask them instead.

“His other name?” Thea asked him.

“I am Thomas Robert Queen.”

“Oh, now I understand,” Thea replied with a smile. “Rob’s full name is Robert Felix Harper.”

Felicity might have not even made the connection if it wasn’t for Thea turning her head to look at her with an almost nervous smile like she was waiting for her answer. Only then Felicity frowned.

“Felix?”

Thea smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah, if it’s been a girl, it would have been Felicity, but this way we decided Felix should be the closest to Felicity. I think you introduced this new tradition of naming kids after inspiring people in our closest environment. Roy and I would like to join into that, and the first name we chose should be dedicated to you. If that’s okay with you.”

Felicity looked at little Robert. The thought that this tiny human-being should carry a name that was dedicated to her felt weird. When Oliver had decided to give Addie the middle name Megan, she had felt like it was more because she had decided to make Millie’s middle name Olivia. Besides, those were their own kids. This, a kid that wasn’t their own even if Robbie was close family, felt bigger.

“Your firstborn daughter is named after me,” Roy said with a smile, his voice breaking through the silence. “It felt only fair to name my firstborn son after you.”

“Well, you saved our lives,” Felicity replied.

Roy shrugged his shoulders. “I am sure we will owe you something like that too sooner or later if we don’t do that already. We are just paying in advance.”

Felicity smiled, looking at her little nephew for a long moment. Eventually, she lifted her gaze to look at Thea and then at Roy. They both looked at her with certainty in his eyes. Yet, Felicity needed to make sure they really wanted this. This was the name of their baby after all.

“Are you sure?”

Thea and Roy looked at each other briefly before they answered in chorus, “Absolutely.”

“Okay then,” Felicity replied with an excited even if nervous smile. “I never had a baby other than Addie or… anything named after me.”

“It’s going to be good practice for that science center for kids,” Oliver stated.

Thea perked up her eyebrows. “You finally decided on a name?”

“Not sure yet,” Felicity replied, “but let’s not talk about that. I’d rather hear more about this little nugget.”

“There is not that much to tell yet,” Thea replied. “He’s been incredibly easy these few hours since he has been born.”

“Ha,” Oliver said, pointing his finger at Felicity. “You always said it was the Queens’ troublemaker genes. It seems like the Queens aren’t the problem.”

“Yeah, probably just your genes and not the entirety of the Queens’” Felicity replied.

Oliver cocked his head. “I can’t win this, right?”

Felicity grinned. “No, you can’t.”


	274. Overwatch and the Green Arrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year, everyone! This is one of my favorite chapters ever written in the universe, so enjoy!

“Oh, I was just about to head out, but it’s a good thing you are here already,” Felicity said, quickly did up her shoelaces of her sneakers and, much to Oliver’s disappointment as he had had a great view on her wonderful butt, turned around to him, “because that way I can already tell you that, in case the police should show up here and ask for my alibi which I am not actually convinced they will do, you have to lie and tell them I was here all night. That’s not a problem, right? Great. See you later.”

Felicity crossed the distance towards him and put her hand onto his shoulder, straightening up onto the tip of her toes to kiss him. It was just a quick peck to his lips, barely lasting long enough for Oliver to respond to it actually. The next moment she already lowered back onto her heels and tried to walk past Oliver without another word. Not hesitating a second, Oliver grabbed her wrist gently and pulled her back in front of him.

“Hm?” Felicity asked all to casually, cocking her head and looking at him innocently. “Any problem?”

“That depends,” Oliver replied. He scrutinized her face thoroughly before he frowned. “Where are you going, and why do you think the police might or might not come here to ask me for your alibi? And why are you wearing… that?”

As he asked the last part of the question, Oliver gestured up and down her body or more specific her clothing. She was wearing tightfitting, black pants and a black hoodie under a black leather jacket. While he did love the look, Oliver was pretty sure that he had never seen her wearing this combination of clothes before. Even more suspicious was the fact that she wore black leather gloves and had something in her hands that Oliver soon noticed as a balaclava.

“Did you squander all our money and have to rob a bank now?” Oliver asked, perking up an eyebrow, when Felicity stayed quiet. “Or are you just letting me know that we are starting some roleplay that I am not fully on yet here?”

For a brief moment, Oliver wondered if she had gotten a lead on Malcolm Merlyn. The thought made his stomach twist and turn painfully, nausea spreading in the pit of his stomach. It filled his entire body and mixed with the panic he felt spreading at the same time. It made his heartbeat quicken, his chest tightening until ever intake of breath felt like he had to force the breath into his lungs where it seemed to be flail around. He felt like his ribs were breaking from the inside, almost like his body was fighting love.

It was weird that, after everything Malcolm Merlyn had done to him and to his family, thinking he might have come back didn’t fear him nearly as much as the thought of what Felicity would do if he ever came back. He didn’t doubt that Felicity had meant it when she had said that she’d kill Malcolm if she ever saw him again. Felicity was fierce and stubborn, not taking shit from everyone. All those were parts of her that he loved because they allowed him to know that she stood up for herself and fought for what she wanted. He also knew that she didn’t want to be protected, and she didn’t want anyone to take this burden she had put on herself off her shoulders, but there was also no way that he could let her go down a dark path like that.

Oliver knew what it did to the soul to cross a line like that and kill. Once he had crossed it, it had been years of always walking more and more into the darkness, and it had taken years to even come close enough to the line to feel like a human being again. Even now, so many years after this had all started, Oliver still wasn’t the person he used to be. While that was positive in some areas, mostly the one that involved his drinking and cheating, it also made some things incredibly hard, especially knowing the things he had done. He didn’t see himself as an irredeemable and unlovable person anymore. He wouldn’t be married and have kids if it was different. He doubted that he would ever be able to look in the mirror and not, in a little part of him, see the man who had killed.

If Malcolm ever came back, Oliver would kill him. As much as he hated the thought of killing again, especially if it wasn’t to protect himself, his loved ones or anyone in the family from an current life-threatening situation, he knew he would do it. He had killed a lot of times and had to still face the darkness it had left in him. He wouldn’t let Felicity cross that line. Even if she didn’t want protection, he would protect her from that, no matter what.

Oliver quickly pushed that thought away. Now wasn’t the time to think about his past mistakes, and he was sure that he’d know if Malcolm was anywhere close. He was keeping a thorough eye on everything suspicion is and around the city as well as around the world. He had even gotten back into touch with Anatoly to ask him to do the same. Anatoly had resources all over the world, eyes and ears basically everywhere. Oliver was doing whatever he could to find Malcolm before Felicity did. He knew he had to.

The only thing that was left to find out was where Felicity wanted to go and what she was about to do now.

“Oh, that’s actually a longer story and I…”

Oliver crossed his arms in front of his chest and angled his head forward a little. Pursing his lips, he fastened his stand and looked at Felicity intently. It took her only a moment to realize that he wouldn’t let her go anywhere until he had gotten his answers.

“Quentin recommended one of Central City’s detectives, Detective… Ma-, Mal-, no,… let’s just say his name was Detective Macaroni. He doesn’t matter much for the story anyway,” Felicity told him. “What matters is that Detective Macaroni investigates several cases of abduction, deprivation of liberty and illegal adoptions. Pregnant girls and women are being abducted from their homes in different stages of their pregnancy and held captive until their babies are born. Then the women were let go with around thousand dollars, and the babies sold to wealthy families, for much more than thousand dollars of course. The detective found out that all the pregnant women have gone to the same clinic. That is where they found their victims. They always chose women with little to no backup of their family and friends, so they wouldn’t be missed too much. All the women have had an amniocentesis, so they also knew the babies would be healthy. The hideout has been uncovered and the last women and their babies taken home.”

“Sounds terrible,” Oliver said. He knew that having one of his kids taken away from him would kill him too, much more than being held captive probably. Even knowing his kid wasn’t dead would offer little to no comfort about not knowing where his child was and whether or not is was safe and happy. He didn’t know what families these babies were sold to after all, whether they were given everything they needed or just the things that money could buy. “I just don’t understand what you want to do now.”

“Well, the thing is that Detective Macaroni has found one of the adoptive parents, and according to them, though they have paid a lot of money for the adoption, the entire process has been accompanied by a law office. Hence, they thought it was all completely legal, or at least there was enough coverage for them to pretend they didn’t know. Anyway, he and the IT-specialists at the CCPT weren’t able to find out which law office is responsible for this. He wanted me to go through the data they gathered at the doctor’s practice to figure if maybe I could do something more.”

“And you did?”

Felicity cocked her head. “I hope there was no doubt I was hearing?”

“I wouldn’t dare to,” Oliver told her with a proud smile. He quickly cleared his throat and got serious again, though. “I still don’t understand what you want to do now.”

“Well, I did figure out which law office is responsible for this,” Felicity explained. “It was a little tricky because they acted under false names, but they still operated close enough to their actual law office for me to find out. I gave the names to Detective Macaroni, and he is already working on getting a search warrant. The problem is that the law office bought one of Queen Inc.’s security program, and, since I only sell quality products, it’s very hard to break through that. It’s actually a little sneaky because the program prevents certain programs from being seen and- it’s a very tough thing to explain to a layperson. All you need to know is that I am not sure that the police is going to find that data easily. It might take months for them to break the code, that is if they even figure out that there is invisible data at all.”

Oliver nodded his head shortly. “Then why aren’t you just hacking to make it visible?”

“Because the program is that good that the invisible data can’t be hacked from the outside. I need to get there and gather it from the computers itself. I… kind of put a little bit of a… let’s say a safety hook into it, so I could actually gather the data at all time which, given our nighttime jobs, seemed like a good idea, but even I have to work right from the computer itself. Of course the program was developed to protect data from criminals. We only sell it to institutions that actually carry sensitive data like that, doctors’ practices and law office and such, but there is always the danger that things are being used differently than intended.”

“Which is why you have the safety hook,” Oliver agreed. He frowned. “Why don’t you wait until your detective Spaghetti asks for new help.”

“Because that safety hook, though unbelievably helpful, might not be exactly legal,” Felicity replied. “Besides, if that ever came out, Queen Inc. can shut down, and thousands of people lose their jobs.”

Oliver nodded slowly once more. Of course she needed to take care of this. He assumed that she was feeling guilty for this. She had developed the program, intending to make the world just a little bit better by protecting sensitive data from getting into the wrong hands. Instead, it was used to hide a terrible crime. That was something he and Felicity would have to talk about later. He knew she needed to take care of this first. Oliver didn’t like the thought that she went out into the field. He’d rather have her safe behind her computers. He knew there was no way around her going out there, though.

“Okay,” he whispered. He stepped forward and kissed her forehead tenderly. “Tell John and Laurel I said they should take good care of you. Otherwise, heads will roll.”

“Oh, they won’t come,” Felicity told him. “Laurel has to work, and John is visiting Lyla’s parents with the kids.”

Oliver frowned. “So, Thea and Roy are coming back from their baby break already? Thea’s just been released from the hospital, and Robbie-“

“No, I am going alone.”

To say Oliver was surprised was not just an understatement, but also the wrong word to describe what he was feeling. It was much more a state of utter shock that took hold of him. The shock quickly mixed with some other feelings, worry first and foremost. He stared at her speechlessly, his hand that he had put to her hip when he had kissed her goodbye was keeping her from leaving.

“Have you lost your mind?” Oliver asked her in a whisper that sounded a lot like a growl.

Felicity pursed her lips for a moment. “This needs to be done.”

“But you can’t go out there without backup,” Oliver hissed. “If the people are really responsible for these illegal adoptions which they certainly are if your hacking verified it, you can’t just break into their law office and hope you make it out of there alive. They might have chosen not to kill these pregnant women, but I am not sure they will shy away from killing someone who uncovered their secret. How can you decide to just go out there alone?”

“Well, tell me what other way is there?” Felicity whispered urgently. “I don’t want to risk that they find a way out of this and-“

“Yeah, luckily, you have a husband with a secret identity.”

“Your secret identity was given up. The Arrow is no longer operating.”

“Yes, but I told you that, after some time, I will go back to the field again,” Oliver replied. “This calls for me to go back to the field.”

“Oliver, it’s only been two months since you have been arrested for being the Arrow. If you come back now, it’s too soon.”

“Maybe, but I can handle it,” Oliver replied in an angry whisper. “What I cannot and will not stand for is you going after criminals without backup. How many times did we have conversations about me not being allowed to go out into the field alone? How many times did you tell me to lean on the people around me, especially you?”

“This is different,” Felicity whispered back, not less angry than him. “I don’t want to do this alone just for the sake of it or because I don’t trust the people around me. I am doing this alone because it’s urgent, and there is no backup available right now. Before you suggest yourself again, you should think about our kids because I am sure they wouldn’t be able to endure another time their daddy is arrested.”

Oliver bit down on his tongue. He felt the need to cross his arms in front of his chest, but he didn’t want to take his hands away from Felicity’s hips like he feared she could run off the moment he let go of her to throw herself into the battlefield. Their kids’ heartbrokenness about his arrest was a sore point to him. Felicity knew that. She had spent a lot of time, comforting him and telling him it wasn’t his fault and that the kids were going to be okay. Their clinginess had actually faded away for the most part, and they were able to sleep in their own beds again. Normality had come back. The fact that she brought the kids up now told him how much she wanted to keep him out of this.

Unfortunately, Oliver couldn’t give Felicity what she wanted. He knew she was worried about him which urged her to do this alone. He was worried what would happen to her if she did this alone, though, and he felt like his worry of Felicity dying outweighed hers of him being arrested. He would still make it out alive of that after all.

“Where is Raisa?” he asked Felicity.

“Upstairs in her room. I told her I would head out.”

“Wait here,” Oliver said. “I will tell her we will both leave.”

He looked at Felicity intently, looking right into her eyes to make sure she knew that this was nonnegotiable. If she left, he’d chase after her. Without any planning, the risk he’d be seen and getting arrested again was much higher that way. Felicity took a step away from him and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Hurry,” she told him. “I’ll wait.”

 

 

The drive to the campaign office or rather the hideout beneath was quiet. Felicity sat on the passenger seat with her arms crossed in front of her chest and her face turned away from him. Oliver was tapping his fingers onto the steering wheel nervously. He felt the need to say something, but didn’t know what he was supposed to say, especially since he felt he was a hundred percent in the right. Since Felicity probably felt the same way about herself, she didn’t make any attempt to speak either.

When they arrived at the campaign office, they headed right to the back entry that led them down to the basement. Oliver was more than astonished by everything that had been done to set up a good hideout for them since he had last been here. The spacious room was separated into areas, and everything was much larger than it had been in the foundry. There was a garage where the motorcycles and their black van were being kept. There was a training area, an area for him to work on his arrows and an area for the chemical and whatever analyses they did themselves. A large conference table with leather armchairs had been set up. The heart of the bunker was a slightly elevated area that was enlightened from the floor and the huge lamps at the ceiling. It was Felicity’s working area as the several keyboards and monitors and whatever other tech stuff she had was telling.

Oliver only took a moment to take it all in or to let the warmth about knowing that Felicity would, from now on, always be in the heart of the bunker spread in his chest. With large steps he went over to the glass cases along the wall at the back of the bunker. They held the costumes of the team. There were Roy’s and Thea’s at the left and Laurel’s and John’s at the right. In the middle of it, there was a green one made of leather with a hood, a quiver and a bow. Though he hadn’t had a costume in two months now, Oliver could still see the similarities it carried to his former costumes, especially to his last one.

“Cisco made it.”

Turning his head back over his shoulder, Oliver saw Felicity leaning against the banister of her working area. She had her arms still crossed in front of her chest, her eyes directed into the empty space. If her facial expression was any indication, she was still pissed at him.

“Long sleeves.”

“Since you got the new suit, after Foster shut at you,” – Felicity’s voice trembled slightly at the mention of the man who had stalked and years later abducted her, Emmy and Tommy – “the number of minor injuries on your arms increased because of the unprotected parts of your skin. Besides, you’ve been complaining about the cold in winter a lot.”

Oliver nodded his head briefly. “I will suit up, and then we will leave. Put on the balaclava.”

With that, the conversation was over again, and silence settled once more. Oliver quickly put on the new gear and his mask before he turned to Felicity.

“Let’s go.”

Without waiting for her response, he went to the motorcycle. He threw the helmet towards her, and got on the motorcycle already. Felicity climbed onto it behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist tightly and pressing close to his back. Oliver waited until he was sure that Felicity was safely pressed against him. Before he started the engine, he asked for the address of the law office. Then he started driving.

Over the years that he had been operating in this city now, Oliver had learned to memorize the map of the city almost like photos. He knew most streets, a lot of buildings, knew how to get into certain buildings the best and whatever. If he had memorized not only the location but the surrounding and the building of the address correctly, it was one the medium-sized office complexes. The best way to get there was over the building at the eastside. There was a dark and barely used side street where he was sure fire escapes led to the roof of the smaller residences. From there, they could use one of his rope arrows to lift them to the larger office tower, and from there they could use an arrow to zip line themselves down to office complex that they would have to break into. Oliver was sure there was something in Felicity’s small backpack that would help them with that.

As they arrived in the small street at the side, Oliver stopped the motorcycle. He turned off the engine and waited until Felicity had slid off before he got up himself. He leaned the motorcycle against the wall while Felicity was taking her helmet off. She put it on the floor next to the motorcycle. When she turned around to climb the fire exit stairs, there was a part of him that wanted to tell her that he should go first, but he felt now just wasn’t the time.

The thing was that Oliver understood where she came from, just like he had understood why she hadn’t come to him immediately after Susan William’s had blackmailed her. He knew how it felt to lose people he loved, so he also knew what it felt like if your strongest need was to keep the people closest to you safe. He’d do anything to keep Felicity safe. He’d do anything, not just to protect her life, but her soul and her entire wellbeing. Wasn’t that the whole thing that trying to find Malcolm before Felicity was about?

Once they had reached the top of the building, Oliver walked past Felicity to the western end of the roof. He took a quick look down and then a more thorough look up to figure out where to shoot the arrow, so they would make it safely up to building. The chimney didn’t look exactly safe, at least not safe enough to carry the weight of both of them. They would have to do this differently than he had had in mind. Puckering his lips slightly, he pulled an arrow from his quiver and grabbed his bow, a good bow but he hadn’t expected anything less given Felicity had been responsible for getting him a new costume, more tightly. He aimed the arrow and-

“Wait.”

Oliver lowered the arrow and looked at Felicity. “Why? What’s going on?”

“I- I don’t want to do this like this.”

“Do you have a different plan?” Oliver asked. “I’ll listen.”

“No, I don’t mean that. I mean this,” Felicity replied, gesturing back and forth between her and Oliver. “I can’t do this as long as we are like this.”

Oliver nodded, understanding exactly what she meant. He put the arrow back to the quiver and dropped his bow to the floor carelessly. He crossed the distance to Felicity with three large steps. Standing in front of her, he framed her face with his hands and angled her head back a little. He gently kissed her forehead through the fabric that covered her face, then the tip of her nose and finally her lips. It was a weird feeling as his lips and her skin couldn’t touch. He could feel the warmth of her skin even through the black fabric, though.

“I am sorry,” Oliver whispered. “I know why you are doing this, and I appreciate your attempt to protect me and our kids, but you doing this alone would be no solution. I know that you can handle stuff. I trust you to handle stuff, but there are always things that can happen, things you might not be able to handle without a little backup, just like it can always happen to me. It is why I have a team in the field with me, and that is why I’d rather do this with you instead of letting you do this alone.”

Felicity nodded her head. “I know we promised each other not to do things alone anymore. It’s just that I cannot stand the thought that something like your arrest happens to you again. One time was bad enough. I can’t do this another time, and neither can the kids.”

Oliver nodded, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. He understood why she was so nervous. Though normality had come back to them since he had been released from the hospital, this was something entirely different. It was the first time he was going out with his new identity since it had happened. Of course it brought back all the fears that they were able to handle in their normal everyday-life. His arrest had made them realize how terrible the consequences were if anything should ever go wrong, and it was just one of the many terribly consequences that were possible.

“I know that,” Oliver whispered. “It’s not going to be any easier for them if their mother is arrested or shot, though. You might have been strong enough to handle my arrest and take care of the kids at the same time, but I am not that strong. I will go crazy.”

“I am not sure I handled it so well.”

Oliver smiled gently and angled Felicity’s head back a little, so he could kiss her lips once more.

“I know you did, so trust me on that,” he whispered. “No more doing things alone, okay?”

Felicity nodded. “Promise.”

“I promise you the same.”

He continued to hold her face in his warm hands for some longer. The expression in Felicity’s eyes that had turned from hard to sad when she had stopped him from shooting the arrow was now turning soft. She nodded her head as much as his hands allowed her to.

“Ready?” he asked her.

“Are you?”

“I am if you are.”

“And I am if you are,” Felicity replied, cocking her head, “so I guess we are ready?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, we are.”

He kissed her lips one last time before he let go of her face. He walked back to where he had dropped the arrow and picked it up from the floor of the roof. Stepping closer to the edge of the roof, he pulled an arrow from the quiver and aimed it at close as possible to the top of the building. He shot the arrow, keeping the other end of the rope safely in his hands, and turned around to Felicity, reaching out a hand for her.

“Come here.”

Felicity did and stepped closer to him, her eyes trying to focus on anything but the street beneath them. Her face was white, her heart racing in his chest. She was incredibly afraid of heights. The fact that she had climbed the building without saying anything said a lot about her strength. Oliver touched her cheek, and instantly her eyes focused on him. She calmed down just enough to smile at him nervously.

“I am going to bend down a little in a second,” Oliver told her in a whisper. “Put your arms around my neck and hold onto me tight. Like in the early days in the elevator, remember? When I straighten up, wrap your legs around my hips as tightly as possible.”

Felicity nodded without asking question, trusting her life into his hands without any hesitation. Oliver bent down as he had said and Felicity pressed herself to his back. Her arms wrapped around his neck, tightly enough to give her hold, but not tightly enough to strangle him. He straightened up slowly, and, with a little jump, she got onto his back, her legs wrapping around his hips.

“Okay?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded, tightening her arms and legs around him once more, before she whispered, “I trust you.”

Oliver smiled about her words and nodded. “Okay, then let’s go.”

With that, he pulled at the rope firmly once before taking a step forward into the empty space. He could hear Felicity gasping for breath in the brief moment that they seemed to fall into the emptiness. When the rope started to hoist them up instead, she groaned. Oliver angled his head forwards and kissed her forearm comfortingly.

It wasn’t long until the knuckles of his fingers pressed against the arrow he had shot. There were a good twenty-five inches between his hands and the iron hook that was fastened in the concrete on the floor of roof, at least if the estimation he had made from the other building was right. If he reached that, he could hold onto it and lift them up.

“And now?” Felicity asked.

“You still trust me?”

Felicity snorted though Oliver didn’t miss the fear that sounded through the little noise.

“I can hardly say no and let go, right?”

“Right,” Oliver replied. “Just hold on tight for a moment longer.”

“Like I said, I wasn’t planning on letting go.”

“Good.”

Oliver looked along his outstretched arm to his hands that were still holding onto the rope tightly. He would have to do a chin-up and then reach out his hand to the hook and pull Felicity and himself over the edge and onto the roof. He knew he could do this, but he felt like it would be a lot easier if he was younger. Felicity did like to point out that he was turning forty in less than two years for good reasons after all.

Taking in a deep breath, Oliver pulled himself with Felicity’s weight added to his back up until his chin was at on level with his hands. He breathed out slowly, willing to make the soreness of his muscle to go away. After two months out of the field, Oliver had to admit that he wasn’t in best shape. It didn’t matter, though. He was here now, and he’d get himself and Felicity back to safety. With that thought in mind, Oliver reached out his right hand and moved his fingers over the concrete until he got a hold onto the hook in the floor. He hooked his fingers inside, holding onto the piece of metal tightly before he loosened his other hand and used it to hold onto it too. His body moved, so it wasn’t his side but his front that was now pressed to the wall. Felicity’s arms tightened even more around his neck, almost making it hard to breathe.

“I am sure you used more comfortable and much safer ways to get into buildings these last years,” Felicity whimpered.

“Maybe,” Oliver replied. He used all the strength in his arms to pull himself up more and rest the weight of his chest on his upper arms. He then rolled himself onto the roof completely and slid several feet away from the edge of the roof, releasing a relieved sigh. “But this takes us right to the office as you said it’s on the top floor. The less security we run into, the better. Besides, I got you pressed against my back. That gets it bonus points.”

“Oliver Jonas Queen, the man who wanted to do all of this alone, suddenly enjoys joking in the field and taking unnecessary risks to exploit a situation for his needs,” Felicity said. “What a change.”

“Only for you,” Oliver replied. He squeezed her thigh gently. “We should get up and-“

“I don’t think I can get up on my own.”

Oliver nodded. “Okay. Just keep holding on.”

He rolled onto his stomach and got up onto his knees. He pushed himself up on his arms and got up on his feet. Felicity was still pressed to his back like she had before. He carried her over the rooftop until they reached the other edge. Without hesitation, he shot an arrow to the middle of the roof of the building the needed to get into and fastened the other end around hook in the concrete. Oliver had no idea what these hooks were there for, but they were incredibly handy right now.

“Ready?” he asked Felicity.

“Mhmm,” she hummed in agreement and tightened her hold on him once more. “Let’s do this.”

Oliver sat down on the edge of the rooftop and ziplined them down to the office complex. Usually, he would have just jumped, but he was sure Felicity appreciated the gentler approach. As they landed on the building, Oliver squeezed Felicity’s thigh and she carefully lowered herself to the floor, still holding onto him tightly.

“You okay?” Oliver asked, turning around to her and wrapping an arm around her waist. Felicity nodded, squeezing her eyes shut. Then she sucked in a deep breath and nodded once more. Oliver waited a second before he said, “Good, let’s go.”

Side by side they walked to the door that would let them into the building. Oliver was about to pull an explosive arrow from his quiver, but Felicity stepped in front of him. She pulled her tablet and some cables out of her backpack, attached them to the electronic lock and, within five seconds, the door opened.

Oliver opened the door and took a look inside. His eyes needed a moment to adjust to the darkness in the staircase before he looked back and nodded to Felicity, wordlessly telling her it was safe. She followed him down the few stairs to the wide glass doors. The letters in milk glass told Oliver that it was the lawyers’ offices. Oliver gestured for Felicity to stay before he rounded the corner to make sure no security was walking patrol. Only when he found it empty, he nodded for Felicity to join him. Again, she made quick work of the lock and led them inside. She strode forwards to one of the offices. The name plate next to the door revealed that it was the office of one namesakes.

“How long will you need?”

“They have good hardware, so if they didn’t spam their computers with crap, I should be able to handle this in like ten minutes.”

Felicity quickly sat down behind the computer. She connected her tablet to it and started working. Her fingers danced over the keyboard, the clattering sound echoing through the empty offices. Oliver stayed at the door, keeping a look on the hallway in case any security should show up after all though he doubted that would be the case since Felicity had probably taken care of it. He also knew Felicity could work the best if she had some room.

“Did you think about how to call yourself yet?” Felicity asked after a few minutes without looking away from her keyboard.

“Hm?”

“Your new identity.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Haven’t thought about it yet.”

“How about Green Arrow?”

“Green Arrow?”

“It has a nice ring to it, and it would remind of the Arrow.”

Oliver nodded. “I like it.”

“Good.” Felicity hit enter and lifted her gaze to him. She beckoned him to come closer. “Look at this.”

Oliver shot another look into the hallway before he walked over to her. He rested his hands on the tabletop and leaned over Felicity, looking at the monitor. He frowned when she saw that she had written an email.

_Two months ago, the Arrow had to turn himself in and give up his fight for the good for the city. What he stood for hasn’t died, though. It continues to live on in the heroes who took up his mantle. People who believe that this city should never descend into hopelessness are still out there, fighting for this city. They believe, although light is full of darkness, that darkness can be the key to find light. And tonight, I am declaring my intention to stand with them, to fight for this city, to be the symbol of hope that the Arrow tried to be._

_I am the Green Arrow._

“I thought we could use this to officially introduce you back to the world,” Felicity explained. “I’ll just send it to Detective Macaroni, whose real name is Malone by the way, and maybe to some guys from the press.”

Oliver read the lines Felicity had typed once more.

“Too much?” Felicity asked, mistaking his silence.

“No, it’s great,” he replied and pushed her chair aside a little. “Just let me change a few details.”

He edited the text, changing some things and adding the last line, so it said, _Overwatch & the Green Arrow_. Felicity might not have dedicated herself to this only today, but neither had he. Since this had been her idea and her work, and all he had done was to help her getting into the building without being seen, the least they should do was to include her name onto it.

Felicity smiled at their names for a moment before she sent the mail from the email address she had probably just set up.

“People will think you are a hacktivist given no arrows were shot.”

“My favorite person in the world is a hacktivist, so I take that as a compliment.”

Felicity smiled at him briefly. “Done.”

She switched off the computer, disconnected her tablet and put everything back into the backpack quickly. Oliver went ahead to the door, peaking another look outside. When the hallway was empty, he beckoned for Felicity to come.

“Please tell me we will just take the doors to go outside,” Felicity whispered as they tiptoed through the hallway. “There is a back entrance to the parking lots that we could take. I can’t get a thermal image on this building, but I think even if there are some security guys, I am sure you can deal with it.”

Oliver grinned. “Fine, you won. Just direct me.”

“Down the stairs to the ground floor and then into the right corridor.”

Oliver did as she told him. He was leading the way she directed him, holding hand behind him for Felicity to hold his fingers. It was a comforting and soothing feeling to have her touch him. Since this had all seemed way too easy for his mistrusting mind, he felt like there was certainly going to get something in the way.

Oliver wasn’t sure if he had jinxed it, but, whether or not that was the reason, they had just reached the foot of the stairs when three security men held their weapons pointed at them. Oliver pushed Felicity closer to his back, shielding her from the weapons.

“Lower your weapons!” one of the security men shouted.

Oliver bit down on his tongue, thinking about what to do. Usually, he wouldn’t even think about it much. He would just grab an arrow and shoot or attack them otherwise. There weren’t much security guys that ever really shot even if they said they would. These guys here looked like elderly guys who had chosen the jobs to just spent their nights eating junk food in front of TV. Anyway, since Felicity was there right with him, he certainly wouldn’t take any risks.

“Press the little button under the arrow rest and put the bow down,” Felicity whispered barely audible.

Oliver didn’t hesitate and followed her direction, making sure he didn’t bend down too much to uncover her. As soon as the bow was down on the floor, two little arrows were shut from it. Still in the air, they exploded, making the security men fly back a few steps. Amazed by the new feature but all to aware of the situation they were still in, Oliver quickly picked up the bow, took Felicity’s hand and ran up the five steps to the landing between the next flight of stairs. He wrapped his arms around Felicity’s stomach, turned them and jumped, so his back was breaking the glass of the window behind them. His hand came to cover Felicity’s eyes from the shattering pieces of glass. They landed on the street ungently, his back hitting the asphalt hard. At least Felicity’s fall had been cushioned by him.

“You okay?” Oliver asked urgently.

“Yeah,” Felicity replied. “Yeah, I think I am. You?”

“Maybe a few cracked ribs and bruises along my back. Nothing to worry about, though. Come on,” Oliver said with a groan through clenched teeth and already got up on his feet, helping Felicity’s to hers too. “I doubt these security guys will get up and follow us, but let’s not take any more risks.”

Hand in hand they ran through the dark alleyways.

 

 

“I think we should do this more often,” Felicity told him, continuing to massage the cooling gel into the skin of his back. “I mean this was a lot of fun, wasn’t it?”

“You mean you lotioning me? Hey, I’m in anytime.”

Oliver turned his head back to where Felicity was sitting on the bathroom counter behind him and winked at her. Smiling, Felicity tightened her legs around his hips and leaned forward, meeting his lips in a gentle kiss. Her fingers danced over the rippled skin on his lower back, the last scar he had taken from the island before the boat had found him. Over the years, Felicity had developed a lovely fascination for this piece of his body.

As their lips parted, she put her arms around his waist from behind and linked her fingers on his stomach. With a low sigh, she rested her chin on his shoulder and snuggled the side of her face to his. Oliver smiled since a good cuddle like this was the absolutely right way to end their eventful day. He put his hands to Felicity’s thighs, enjoying the way goosebumps spread wherever he touched.

It had been a quite new experience to him to have Felicity at his side like that. She stayed behind her computers for most of the time if she wasn’t playing the bait for a serial killer like with the Dollmaker and the city wasn’t under a kind of attack that kept her from staying in their hideout like it had been when Slade had attacked. Still, Felicity had asked for more self-defense training several times of the years, and eventually Oliver had given in, thinking to himself that it was probably for the best if she could defend herself. Thinking that she’d voluntarily throw herself into a situation where she might have to use these techniques made his stomach twist, though. They would definitely have to double or better triple or whatever down on her training, and even then, he couldn’t agree to this with a good feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“You really want to go out in the field more often?” Oliver asked after a moment of silence.

Felicity chuckled. “Just if I don’t have to go higher than the ground floor.”

“It was nice to have you there and to support you there,” Oliver replied, “but I’d rather have you save behind your computers.”

“I know.” Felicity kissed his shoulders. “Admittedly, it’s where I feel better too.”

Oliver opened his eyes and turned around to Felicity. She rested her arms around his neck loosely, moving her fingertips through his short stubble. They smiled at each other contently.

“We are the perfect couple, aren’t we?”

Felicity smiled. “We certainly have our mistakes, but we work through them and always manage to complement each other in the best way, so yeah, maybe we are perfect.”

“At least we are perfect for each other.”

Felicity hummed, leaning forward and capturing his lips in a kiss. Her lips opened, and Oliver stroked his tongue against Felicity’s. She released a sigh that revealed that she loved kissing him just as much as he enjoyed kissing her. Oliver let his hands travel up her naked legs and grabbed her butt to pull her closer to the edge of the counter.

“What about your back?” Felicity asked between two kisses, her fingertips stroking along his spine. “Do you think it can take some more stunt.”

“I won’t let a few bruises keep me from-“

When there was a beeping sound, Felicity gently pushed at his shoulder, got up from the counters and said, “Oh, wait. I guess the news about the Green Arrow and Overwatch have spread. I set up an alarm if anything comes out.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Oliver said, turning around and following Felicity into the bedroom where she was already lying across the bed on her stomach with her back turned towards him, so he had a wonderful view on her ass, and working on her tablet. “I won’t even let battle wounds get in the way and you turn me down because you want to revel in your new fame. We should talk about your priorities.”

“Oliver, Honey,” Felicity said without looking up. “I can basically hear in your voice that you are staring at my ass which I know you love to look at. I am sure you can get over the short delay with that view in front of you.”

“So it’s just a delay?” Oliver asked. When Felicity didn’t answer, he frowned. “Hon?”

“I guess we are the new Bonnie and Clyde.”

Oliver’s frown deepened. “What?”

Felicity beckoned for him to come closer. Oliver stepped to the bed and lay down on top of Felicity, his chest pressing to her back. He was about to kiss her shoulder when the video Felicity was watching on her tablet caught his attention. Frowning, he watched himself kissing Felicity on the rooftop of a building. Her face was hidden behind the balaclava, his face hidden under the green hood of his new gear.

“Where did you get that from?” he asked.

“Well, it seems like we had someone watching us,” Felicity replied. “The blog here writes that the video was taken by a young resident who thought it was a surprise by his parents as he is a fan of the Arrow. When it turned out that it wasn’t them, his parents decided to send the video to the media. They connected the appearance to the mail I sent them. Well, I guess the possible love story that was recorded is a lot more interesting than the case of illegal adoptions we helped to solve. Media preferences have been messed up for years now, so who’s surprised?”

Oliver looked at the screen once more. He hated that the media, at least every once in a while, liked to stick their noses into his and Felicity’s marriage. He didn’t need their secret identities, who of course were madly in love with each other too, to be in the light of the media circle too. Groaning, he took her tablet, switched it off and put it down to the floor.

“I think we need to focus on our love story now.”

“Oh, and what do you have in mind?”

Oliver angled his head forward and kissed the side of Felicity’s neck gently. His hips pressed against her butt, and he lowered his weight onto her a little bit more.

“Oh, I see,” Felicity said. “You want to celebrate.”

“You’re in?”

Felicity turned her head back as much as possible, smiling at him. “Of course I am.”

“Good,” Oliver replied.

He captured her lips in a kiss. It was time to celebrate.


	275. About tensions and "tensions"

“How did we get so lucky?”

“You mean so lucky that Laurel and William took their godchildren to the baby and toddler swimming with John and Connor, and Tommy and Emmy are playing in their rooms contently, so that we can enjoy some quality time as a couple in the middle of a weekend afternoon?”

Felicity snuggled back against Oliver more, stroking her hands up and down his thighs through his sweatpants. She angled her head, that rested against his shoulder comfortingly, back a little, so she could smile at him. Butterflies started dancing happily when she found his eyes already on her, a content smile on his lips.

“Yeah,” he whispered back.

“I have no idea.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed her. It was a chaste kiss, not lasting very long, but it was a perfect one nonetheless. As their lips parted, they smiled at each other for a moment. When they looked back at the TV, Oliver tightened his arms around Felicity’s waist, pulling her back into his embrace again. His lips kissed a path down the side of her neck to the neckline of his green hoodie jacket she was wearing. Felicity could feel goosebumps spreading all over her skin, and, if the way Oliver’s lips twitched against the side of her neck, he noticed it too. With a sigh, she closed her eyes, just enjoying the way Oliver caressed her neck.

She loved lazy hours like these. Wearing his clothes and snuggling up to the warmth of his embrace while they were just being lazy was just one of her favorite ways to spend her day. They didn’t do this often enough. Between their daytime jobs and nighttime jobs and raising five kids it just wasn’t easy to just take time for themselves. It was a good thing that their love for each other had developed while chasing criminals and not during lazy afternoons on the couch. They’d probably be screwed otherwise, and Felicity wasn’t sure-

“Jane Fonda is kind of hot.”

Felicity frowned and opened her eyes to see Jane Fonda as she walked over the red carpet for some movie premier. She wore a pretty pink dress that accentuated her slim figure, and she looked as stunning as she had always been. The actress had to be close to being ninety years old now, but apart from the wrinkles around her eyes you barely saw it. Though Felicity knew that some beauty surgeries had added to it, Jane Fonda still looked naturally beautiful, and she doubted that it would be much different without the doctors’ help.

“So, you went from kissing me to complimenting another woman?” Felicity asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “I don’t think I like you right now.”

“Felicity,” Oliver said in a soothing tone.

“No, I am mad right now.”

“Fe-li-ci-ty.”

Felicity pursed her lips, doing her best not to give in. Oliver knew that she had a weakness for the way he said her name when he really tried to calm her down, mostly when she had babbled herself into a frenzy. He said her name in a singsong then, accentuating every syllable like they all held their own meaning. She couldn’t help it.

When Oliver’s lips brushed against her ear, pulling at her lobe gently, Felicity had to suppress a somewhat needy whimper. Her fingers tingled with the need to move into Oliver’s hair and keep his head where it was. She resisted the need, though.

“Wanna know who’s going to look even prettier than Jane Fonda at that age?”

“If the answer is not me, I don’t want to hear it.”

“Of course it’s you,” Oliver whispered into her ear, “and you don’t even need plastic surgery for that.”

“You are just trying to earn yourself some husband points,” Felicity said.

“Is it working?”

“Unfortunately, it is.”

She could feel Oliver smile against her skin, and it almost made her want to keep pouting, just so his ego wouldn’t get ahead of him too much. The way his stubble scratched against her sensitive skin as his lips brushed against the soft spot right under her ear made it impossible, though. She could feel her core prickle with a sudden wave of need that took over her body. She quickly turned around, straddling him and pressing down on his lap. Just when she lowered her head to kiss him, Oliver straightened up. Their lips met in a heated kiss, their tongue dancing together. A needy moan left Felicity’s lips.

“Do you think there is time for this?”

As soon as the last syllable had fallen from her lips, Felicity pressed her lips back to his again. Her hips were moving on own accord, not really listening to her brain that tried to make the stop. She didn’t want to start something they couldn’t finish. Her hips refused to accept that, though. Instead, they followed the prickling feeling in her core that told them that they really, really needed to move things along. Oliver hardened beneath her, his cock pressing more and more against his sweatpants.

“We just need to hurry a little,” Oliver told her, “but we have to take the time.”

Immediately, Oliver’s lips were back on hers. His tongue stroked over the roof of her mouth. Felicity’s breathing quickened, her need for him growing by second. Her fingers explored his naked chest, enjoying the way his soft skin was rippled where scars covered his body. She had always seen the scars as a part of himself, a part that made him just as beautiful as his abs and his deep blue eyes at the smile that was reserved just for her. Her hips thrust down onto him more quickly. When a particularly hard thrust made Oliver moan out, his finger gripped the zipper of the hoodie jacket she had borrowed from him and unzipped it.

“Besides, I have missed Joy and Letitia.”

Felicity was already breathless from kissing Oliver, but she would have just continued kissing him and fought the burning of her lungs that screamed for air if it hadn’t been for Oliver’s comment. She pulled back slightly and stopped moving on top of him, looking at Oliver with a frown and cocking her head.

“Joy and Letitia?”

Oliver grinned, pushing the lapels of the hoodie jacket apart and stroking his hands over her breasts. He angled his head forward and kissed the top of her right and then the top of her left breast. His thumbs moved over the cup of her bra, stroking right over the fabric that covered her nipples.

Felicity chuckled. “Joy and Letitia, really?”

He kissed the top of her breasts once more, taking the hoodie jacket off and letting the simple white top she wore underneath follow. His calloused hands stroked down her back, making goosebumps spread all over her skin. His fingers took hold of the clasp of the bra, opened it and took it off too.

“Yes, Joy and Letitia,” Oliver confirmed nodding his head. “I felt it fit the theme of your name. Felicity with Joy and Letitia, all the ladies I want and need in my life.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow, amused that he had names for her boobs as she had always thought that, if there was any part of her body he’d give a name to, it was her butt. Just like she had an obsession for the scar at his lower back, he had a weakness for her ass.

“When exactly did that happen?” Felicity asked. “I mean you giving them names.”

“Over the past twenty-eight months that I wasn’t allowed to touch them or to kiss them or to do anything with them,” Oliver replied, already distracted my cupping them in his hands and kissing them, much closer to her nipples now. His eyes were focused on them like it was the first time he saw boobs and it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. “God, I missed them.”

Felicity was still chuckling. She did some quick math in her head and figured that Oliver was indeed right. Around twenty-eight months ago, she had found out that she was pregnant with Millie. Her breast had quickly grown sensitive to Oliver’s touch, and she had asked him to avoid touching or kissing them which he had done then. After Millie’s birth, she had been breastfeeding at first, so her breasts hadn’t been much fun to play with. She had still been breastfeeding when they had found out that she was pregnant with Addie, and the whole cycle had just repeated itself. Two months ago, she had stopped breastfeeding her youngest. It had taken until a little while ago for her breast to be back in her no-baby-condition. Now they were.

“Well, they are all yours.”

“I was hoping you would say that.”

The words were only whispered, his breath ghosting over her right nipple. Felicity had to press her lips together and roll them into her mouth to suppress a needy whine to fall from her lips. When Oliver’s lips started kissing the less sensitive parts of her breast, pressing kisses to the parts of her breasts other than her nipple, Felicity’s hips started moving again, seeking the intense pleasure that her tease of her husband refused to give her yet. He was so hard, and in their position, she could just rub against him perfectly, his cock pressing to her core through the several layers of clothes. His pubic bone rubbed against her clit whenever she slid close to his body.

“You’re cheating,” Oliver growled and took hold of her hips.

“You’re teasing,” Felicity groaned in response.

Oliver’s lips widened to a grin against the underside of her breast. He moved his chin back and forth against her tender skin, his stubble scratching her in the best way possible. Felicity felt her core clamping down on emptiness as her need just grew more. She tried to move, trying to get some well-needed friction, but Oliver’s hold on her was too firm, not allowing her to move the slightest.

“What’s the fun,” Oliver asked, his eyes locking on hers as he licked over her right nipple, so the rough top of his tongue moved against the soft nub, and, though the touch only lasted for a short moment, it made Felicity’s head fall back and a moan fall from her lips, “if I don’t get to tease a little?”

“You tease more than a little,” Felicity told him, “and you said yourself that we need to hurry.”

“Not that much,” Oliver said.

He blew a breath against the nipple he had just licked. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, suppressing a strangled moan. Goosebumps spread all over her skin.

“Oliver,” she whispered, “please.”

She knew he couldn’t withstand her if she made him know how much she wanted and needed him. Indeed, Oliver’s eyes darkened and filled with lust. If she wasn’t so needy for him already, she was sure she’d be needy for him now at latest. The way he looked at her like she was water and he was desperate to drown – where had she read that again? – just reminded her of how much he still loved and wanted her. Nobody had ever looked at her that way before Oliver, and the fact that his love and desire for her only seemed to grow stronger the longer they were together fascinated and scared her at the same time. That she felt the same way for him made it a little easier, though.

Without another word, Oliver leaned forward and captured her right nipple between his lips. The took a gentle hold of the sensitive skin, keeping it in place as he rubbed the underside of his tongue against it again and again. It was a teasing movement. His tongue felt against her nipple, but the underside was soft, denying her the friction of the rougher top. He wrapped his left arm around her lower back, holding her captive between his forearm and his chest, so she wouldn’t be able to move. He used his free left hand to circle her areola with his thumb.

Felicity was panting. Even if he was still teasing and not giving his best to pleasure her yet, the touch of his tongue, lips and fingers mixed with the delicious burning of his stubble and the touch of his fingers was enough to send her nerve endings on fire. It was like he was drawing her to the edge so slowly and gently that she didn’t know how close she was to falling over it until she realized there was nothing but emptiness over the tips of her toes.

“Oliver,” she whispered.

She was using even more strength and energy to get her hips to move despite Oliver’s hold on her, and she actually managed to move back and forth the slightest bit. Though it was only a tiny movement, Felicity could feel her clit pressing to his pubic bone a little. At the same time, Oliver applied some more pressure with his tongue. Felicity’s nails scratched over the back of Oliver’s head, grabbing his short hair.

“Oliver,” she whispered once more, urging him on.

When Oliver, instead of giving her more, let go of her breast, she frowned and released a frustrated groan. It was like she had enjoyed the anticipation of the adrenaline kick that would spread in her the moment she’d jump from the cliff. The moment she had been ready to jump, her legs already bent and an excited smile on her lips, a lasso had captured her and pulled her back from the cliff, though.

“What are you doing?”

Oliver grinned cheekily. “I thought you wanted to say something.”

“Get back to work, Mister, or I swear I will find someone else who- Oh God!”

She had still been speaking when Oliver wrapped his lips around her left nipple now, his free fingers pinching the right one. It was everything Felicity needed and more. The pleasure built up quickly. Fire spread in her veins, creating a delicious burn inside of her. Her breathing got erratic, her heart beating so firmly, she was sure it wouldn’t only break hers, but Oliver’s too. It wasn’t long until she came, the tension that had built in her body suddenly letting go as involuntary spasms ran through her body.

The moment the waves of her orgasm ceased, Felicity used the hold she still had on Oliver’s hair to angle his head back. Her lips pressed to his, stealing a hot and desperate kiss. It didn’t help soothing her still erratic body functions. If anything, it only stirred her need for him once more. It was crazy, but, with Oliver, it seemed like there was never enough. She always wanted more and needed more. Luckily, Oliver was always happy to please as his hands guiding the movements of her hips told.

Quickly, Felicity broke away from the kiss. She got rid of her sweatpants and panties. Meanwhile, Oliver pulled his boxer briefs and sweatpants down in one go. He didn’t take them off, just lowered them enough for his erection to spring free. Felicity felt tempted to climb between his legs and take him into her mouth, pleasuring Oliver the way he had pleasured her. She knew she didn’t have the patience for that, though. Her core was already aching for Oliver to fill her, and for the pleasure to take hold of her body once more.

Felicity climbed back into Oliver’s lap. Neither of them lost any time. Oliver positioned his cock at her entrance, and they both groaned at how ready she was for him. She was so wet that he slid into her easily when Felicity lowered herself onto him. When he was seated inside of her completely, their eyes locked.

There was a moment of silence. Neither of them spoke. Neither of them moved. Only their heavy breathings were heard in the otherwise quiet room. Oliver’s hands were stroking up and down her back, while Felicity tried to find the right position for her hands to hold onto Oliver’s shoulders and give her balance to move. Just when she had found the right position, Oliver’s hands came to rest on her hips. Still looking at each other, they started moving. Felicity lifted herself off Oliver’s lap only slightly before she pressed down again, angling her hip forward at the same time, so her clit pressed to his pubic bone. Oliver met her thrusts halfway, easing her movements through the guidance of his hands on her hips.

It was lazy and slow, the need not as obvious and ever-present as it had been before. It was more like it was dangling right under the surface, but neither of them was ready to let that take over just yet. They knew they had to hurry, but just for some minutes they wanted to enjoy taking their time like this.

Sooner than Felicity was happy with, her need for more took over, though. Their movements grew quicker and sloppier. Their eyes were still focused on each other, their lips slightly parted as they were panting and feeling the other’s breath on their faces. When the sound of flesh hitting against flesh grew louder, she could feel the prickle in the tip of her toes.

“Oliver.”

The whisper fell from her lips just in time for Oliver to capture her lips in a needy kiss that silenced her sounds of pleasure as her orgasm crashed through her. Her fingernails dug into his shoulders as the feeling of utter content and joy spread in every cell of her body, turning into ecstasy and, for some long moments, let her forget everything else. It was just Oliver and her, moving as he was chasing the relief she was already riding out.

When Oliver came, groaning against her lips and chasing the taste of her tongue even more, he tensed. His cock twitched between her inner walls, stimulating the still too sensitive parts of herself. Felicity gasped against his lips at the deliciously stinging feeling it created in her lower stomach, her fingernails digging into his skin a little more.

They took their time to regain their control, kissing lazily between moments of just resting their foreheads together. It took a while until Felicity was able to loosen her hands from Oliver’s shoulders. Her arms wrapped around Oliver’s neck loosely. While Oliver was stroking his hands up and down her back, she left a trail of kisses from the corner of his lips over his cheek and neck. With a sigh, she rested her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes.

If someone had told her that years into her marriage she’d still be as crazy for her husband as the first day, she wouldn’t have believed it. She was almost waiting for the moment that she no longer felt the need to spontaneously jump him and they’d start to schedule regular sex once a week or every other week. Yet, it didn’t happen, and Felicity felt they were far away from that still. There was something about their sex that always felt new, no matter how many times they had had sex by now.

“We should clean ourselves up before the kids come in.”

“Mhm,” Felicity hummed in agreement. She wrapped her legs around his hips and tightened his arms around his neck. “You can carry me.”

Oliver chuckled, but he did as she asked. He rolled them to the edge of the bed, sat up there and carried Felicity to the bathroom. She smiled against his shoulder at the stumbling steps he took with his sweatpants and boxer briefs still around his knees.

He sat her down on the edge of the bathroom counters and slipped out of her. They both groaned at the feeling of loss, but there was no time to revel in it and turn it back into need for more. They were lucky they hadn’t gotten caught during the pleasure they had gotten. Felicity remembered very vividly what had happened when Emmy had caught them one time.

Oliver cleaned himself up and tugged his boxer briefs and sweatpants back into place before he took care of Felicity. He wiped the wet washcloth between her legs gently, cleaning the remains of their sex away before he got her new underwear and her sweatpants as well as the white top and hoodie she had worn and helped her to put everything on, leaving the bra away. They did all that in quiet, enjoying the lack of need to say anything.

When Oliver was finished, his put his hands on the counter next to her hips and slowly leaned in. Their lips were hovering just a breath away from each other when-

“Leave me alone!”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. It didn’t happen often that Emmy rejected any of her siblings. She usually loved spending time with them much more than they enjoyed spending time with her as she used to be a little too energetic, especially for Tommy. If she tried to chase him away, that meant quite a lot.

“We should probably go and check what’s going on there,” Felicity suggested.

Oliver nodded and pecked her lips briefly. “Absolutely.”

As they stepped out into the corridor, they saw Tommy at Emmy’s door, unsuccessfully trying to open it as Emmy seemed to be holding it shut from the inside.

“Hey,” Oliver said with gentle yet loud voice. “We are not playing with the doors, Guys. You know that.”

“Mama!”

Immediately Tommy let go of the door and ran to Felicity. She scooped him up into her arms and kissed his cheek.

“What’s going on, Buddy?” she asked him.

Before Tommy could answer, Emmy opened the door and said with defiant voice, “I played with Tommy the entire time, but now I want to-“

“Mommy and I are not hard of hearing,” Oliver interrupted their daughter, “so how about you turn down your voice a little.”

Emmy puckered her lips for a moment, crossing her arms in front of her chest, obviously pouting about her dad’s word. Oliver only perked up and eyebrow, though, waiting for the rest of the explanation.

“Emmy played with me,” Tommy said when Emmy kept silent, “and now I want her to read me a story, but she doesn’t want to.”

“I want to-“

“What did I just say about your voice?” Oliver interrupted Emmy.

Felicity looked at Tommy. “Should we go downstairs and read a story together? One from that book about Christmas?”

“From the book about Hanukkah,” Tommy replied, making Felicity smile.

“Okay, let’s do that.”

She stroked her hand over Oliver’s back as she went past him. When she started descending the stairs, she saw Oliver going into a kneeling position. He tugged at two strands of Emmy’s hair gently as he talked to her with soothing voice.

Fights between the kids were still a weird situation for Felicity. It felt so unreal as her babies used to get along so effortlessly. She was glad most fights didn’t last longer than a few hours and were fixed easily. And she was even more happy that, with Oliver, she had found a partner who handled these things with as much ease and gentleness as she did.


	276. Independent woman

Felicity smiled at how peacefully asleep Oliver was. He was lying on his stomach, his arms wrapped around the pillow that his head rested on. With the way the side of his face was pushed into the pillow, Felicity was sure the fabric would leave creases in his face, and it’d look incredibly sweet on him. He was snoring slightly, quiet puffs of breath coming from his lips every once in a while.

It didn’t matter how long she had been married to Oliver now or how often she had seen him fast asleep. It would never stop warming her heart knowing the peace he had found in his heart since they had first met. It was almost like there was an entire life between the man who had never slept for longer than thirty minutes, always ready to jump and fight whoever attacked him. Even years after coming back and living in a somewhat safe place, he would still have trouble sleeping. During their marriage, he had started to find his peace. Felicity knew that the depth and quiet of his sleep depended on where he was and who he was with. He’d always sleep the best here at their home in their bed with Felicity right beside him. He’d even be so fast asleep that Felicity would have to put some effort into waking him up. She didn’t mind. To her, it only showed how much Oliver’s soul had healed from all the trauma the five years away had caused and so many of his decisions after had reinforced.

Felicity reached out her hand and stroked her fingers through Oliver’s hair. There was a brief moment that Felicity knew Oliver’s survival sense was taking over. He tensed, about to wake up. It only lasted for two seconds, though. It was like his subconscious mind registered that it was her, and his body relaxed, knowing no attack was going to come from her. His breathing evened out again, going back to the quiet snoring.

Her smile widened. Felicity knew how scared Oliver hat been at the beginning of their relationship. After he had attacked his mother in his first night back in Starling, he had been worried the same could happen again. The last he had wanted was to hurt her, so he had stayed awake for hours and hours, just watching her sleep. If she had slept, he had been awake, and she had had to be awake for Oliver to catch some sleep. It had been maddening, but it had been necessary. Over the years, Oliver had been able to relax. In her presence, every cell of his body and every edge of his conscious and subconscious and unconscious mind knew that there was no danger coming from her, and, hence, there was no need to protect himself and fight for his life around her.

Shooting a look at her watch, Felicity sighed. She could spend hours watching Oliver like this. After everything he had been through, it still amazed her that he had overcome all that stress and was able to relax like that. Some other day, she would spend hours watching him until he woke up. Today was not that day, though. She had an early press conference, and there was a stylist as well as her public relations manager waiting for her to prepare her for the questions that would be asked.

“I gotta go now,” Felicity whispered. She kissed Oliver’s stubbled cheek. “I love you.”

“Love you.”

Felicity smiled at his whispered response. She doubted he was awake, and she doubted he’d really know that he had responded to her like that if he woke up. If she asked him, he’d still be able to tell her that he had responded like that. Oliver knew in every fiber of his body that he loved Felicity, just like she knew she loved him. They didn’t have to be awake or to be fully conscious to know it. They just did.

A last sigh left Felicity’s lips when she kissed Oliver’s cheek once more. She grabbed her high heels from the floor and tiptoes to the door. She turned her head back over her shoulder to look at Oliver one last time before she left the bedroom. She went downstairs, put on her shoes and coat and shot a last look into the mirror.

She chuckled slightly at her sight, shaking her head. Looking at herself in the mirror before leaving the house had become a habit. As the head and face of the company she had learned it was important to look at least acceptable. Since Felicity kind of liked dressing up she hadn’t minded too much. In some way, her dresses and high ponytail as well as her lipstick had become a trademark of her just like the hood, the mask and the bow were the Green Arrow’s trademarks. Anyway, since she knew the stylist was going to make sure she looked perfect for the press anyway, she hadn’t put on any makeup and hadn’t done her today. It was a weird feeling to go out for work like that.

Felicity grabbed her keys from the bowl on the small table right next to the door and already reached out her hand to open the door when she looked up. Gasping for breath as her heart started racing, Felicity jumped back a few steps. She scrunched up her nose at the sight of the fist-sized spider. She hated spiders. She wasn’t scared of them, but she thought they were gross like really, really gross.

For a brief moment, Felicity considered just opening the door. The thought of getting her hand anywhere near this terribly gross creature made a cold shiver running down her back, though. Of course she could take the way through the garage, but that would mean giving the spider the time and freedom to go wherever it wanted to go. She didn’t trust it to stay where it was for very long. Terrible scenarios of the spider being gone and suddenly reappearing in the bathroom while she was taking a shower or crawling up her leg while she was sleeping.

Not hesitating, Felicity turned around on the balls of her feet and hurried upstairs. She tried to run through the hallway as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake up the kids just yet. William and Emmy would have to get up for school soon enough. They could use some more sleep before that.

“Oliver!” Felicity whispered urgently as she tore the bedroom door open and hurried to the bed. “Oliver!”

She had already crawled to the head of the bed, her fingers moving through Oliver’s short hair when he woke up. With a quick movement, he turned around and sat up in bed. His eyes were wide open, glancing from confusion.

“What happened?” he asked, his voice still raspy from sleep. “Did your waters break?”

Felicity cocked her head and smiled amusedly. She put her hand to Oliver’s cheek and scratched her fingernails through his stubble gently. Even in the darkness she could see the wrinkle the pillow had left on the side of his cheek.

“It’s been a few months since my waters broke the last time.”

Oliver looked at her with almost empty eyes for a moment. Eventually, he groaned and rubbed his hands over his face, shaking his head. His eyes were more focused when he looked at her this time though the tiredness was still written all over his face. He put his hand on hers on his cheek and snuggled into her touch.

“I can’t remember when I have been this fast asleep the last time,” Oliver said with a sigh and closed his eyes for a moment. He pressed his nose against Felicity’s wrist, breathing in the scent of her skin. When he opened his eyes again, he was frowning slightly. “Shouldn’t you be on the way to QI for your press conference.”

“I would,” Felicity said, “but I think I need my heroic husband downstairs.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Your heroic husband, hm?”

“Yes.” Felicity smiled. “You gotta safe a damsel in destress.”

“Oh, I doubt you are a damsel, or is there a kangaroo downstairs?”

“No, it’s not that bad. You would have heard me screech from downstairs,” Felicity told him. “There is a spider, though.”

Oliver chuckled. “Felicity Smoak, the girl who defeated Slade Wilson and threatened a ton of villains needs her husband to get rid of a spider.”

Felicity puckered her lips and poked her forefinger between his ribs. “Be nice, or I am going to not need you for other things too.”

“Understood.”

He pecked her lips shortly before he crawled out of bed. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip at how he stood there in all his naked glory. His bootylicious butt and well-defined abs were not something Felicity thought she’d ever get tired of staring at. Besides, seeing him naked only reminded her of the night before and all the wonderful things Oliver had done with her once the kids had been asleep. She guessed she had tired him out so much that he had slept like a baby last night.

Once Oliver had put on boxer briefs and cleared his throat, considerately directing her attention to his face, Felicity led him downstairs. Just like she had thought it would, the spider wasn’t where she had left it. Instead, it had moved several inches and was now even closer to the door handle. A cold shiver ran down Felicity’s spine. She just hated spiders.

“I am going to carry it outside.”

“Carry it outside,” Felicity repeated his words in a deprecating whisper and rolled her eyes. “Can’t you just kill it?”

Oliver looked back at her over his shoulder and grinned, already approaching the little monster. “No.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. “There was a time that you loved me more than yet.”

Oliver chuckled. “Poor baby.”

He rested his hands together and carefully got the spider on them. Felicity watched Oliver pushing down the door handle with his elbow to open the door. He carried the spider to the lawn and let it down there before he came back and closed the door again. He smiled amusedly at the expression on Felicity’s face.

“Don’t you worry, Love, I am going to save you again if the spider comes back.”

“Yeah, you save me, and then I kill you.”

Oliver chuckled. He approached Felicity and put his hands to her cheeks. He leaned in and kissed her gently. Felicity put her hands to his wrist and sighed against his lips. If Oliver was trying to prove to her that she’d never kill him, he was doing very well. When their lips parted, Oliver nuzzled her nose gently before brushing his lips against hers shortly one last time.

Felicity leaned her head back, tightening her arms around Oliver’s waist and pressing her chest more to Oliver’s. She smiled at him joyfully, the playful discussion about the spider being forgotten for the moment.

“Will you go to the office today?”

“No, not today,” Oliver replied. “I promised Tommy, Millie and Addie to watch your press conference with them, and I have to record it for Emmy. She’s so mad I didn’t let her skip school to watch it. They are incredibly proud of you, just like I am.”

Felicity smiled and straightened up onto the tip of her toes to kiss Oliver gently. She loved hearing he was proud of her. Knowing the people closest to you, the people you loved most, respected you for what you did and were amazed by your doings meant a lot to Felicity. Knowing Oliver was as proud of her as she was proud of him was a wonderful thing.

“I gotta go now.”

“You are going to be great,” Oliver said and kissed the tip of her nose. “I know that.”

“Thank you.”

Felicity smiled and squeezed his fingers before she turned to the door. She grabbed her keys and walked to the garage. When she turned around after half the way, Oliver was leaning in the frame of the door with his hands crossed in front of his chest while he was watching her leaving. The cold December air didn’t seem to bother him much. He was still there when Felicity shot a look into the rearview mirror as she was directing the car down the driveway, and Felicity was sure he wouldn’t go inside before he couldn’t see her car anymore.

 

 

“Millie, come on!” Oliver called out. “Mommy’s going to be on TV soon.”

Immediately, Millie came running into the living room with her favorite pacifier between her lips. She had been looking for it for the past ten minutes now, unwilling to accept any of the other pacifiers Oliver had offered her. Millie only ever accepted her favorite binky. It was a good thing Felicity had bought a second one of that, so they always had a replacement.

When Millie tried to climb onto the couch, Tommy crawled over to his little sister. He sat down right in front of her and spread his legs before he leaned forward and pulled at Millie’s arm and leg to help her onto the couch. Millie sat down between his spread legs, her back rested against Tommy’s chest. Oliver smiled and sat down next to them with Addie, who was happily chewing on her donkey’s ear, in his lap.

“Mama!” Millie screeched excitedly, pointing at the TV as soon as Felicity’s face showed up.

“Millie,” Oliver said gently, “no speaking with the binky in your mouth.”

“Pssst!” Tommy hushed his father immediately, not wanting to miss a single moment of his mommy on TV.

Addie leaned back against Oliver, almost letting herself fall against his chest. Her lips were still wrapped around the donkey’s ear, but her eyes were now looking at him. When Oliver smiled down on her, Addie pointed at the TV.

“Yes, there’s mommy,” Oliver whispered. He leaned down and kissed Addie’s forehead. “Let’s watch mommy.”

The press conference started with Felicity telling the news about the progressions of QI’s project with Wayne Enterprise. She apologized for Bruce’s absence, but he was busy in Gotham. Oliver couldn’t say he was sorry that Bruce wasn’t there though he knew that Felicity enjoyed spending time with him since his understanding of computer science and such things was close to hers. Besides, she kind of enjoyed his flirting a little bit. Oliver didn’t mind since he knew Felicity only loved him and he couldn’t be prouder to have a smart and beautiful wife that other people noticed too. He just wasn’t too proud to admit that he was glad Bruce wasn’t there. At the end of the day, he loved to have Felicity alone to himself and the kids the most.

He watched his kids. He doubted they understood a lot of what their mommy said. He himself only understood half of what was said and that was mostly because he had heard her speech before and had been able to ask about the things he hadn’t understood. Felicity was amazing at explaining things to amateurs, but of course the press conference was mainly for people advanced in the technical area. Anyway, Tommy and Millie were listening carefully, smiling whenever the camera showed Felicity.

Once Felicity had given her speech, the conference was opened for questions. A lot of reporters asked detailed questions about the project and its progression and a lot of questions about the Science Center for kids that should open at the beginning of January. Felicity answered the questions sometimes more and sometimes less thoroughly. She handled this perfectly. Years of practice had only made her better though she had been quite successful from the beginning.

Despite how well Felicity handled this all, Oliver couldn’t deny that he was a little nervous. At the beginning of their marriage, she had often been asked questions about his past like how she was dealing with the many women he was known to have been with or with his five years away. Lately, she had often been asked about his arrest. For some reason, the press had always seemed to be desperate to make Felicity’s life harder by bringing up his mistakes. Oliver knew she could handle that too, but it did bother him. He wanted to be Felicity’s greatest supporter, not her greatest weakness. He knew it was ironic because, without any doubt, Felicity and the kids were his greatest weakness as Green Arrow too, but there was a big difference between being weak because the person you loved was threatened and being weak because the person you loved had made mistakes that could be held against you.

Of course, it wasn’t long until he was brought up. Oliver held his breath, doing his best not to get angry at the question though he had to admit that he felt more like rolling his eyes when he heard it.

“Mrs. Queen, you are said to be one of the leading women in computer science and other technological areas. You have been awarded with the title of Most successful business woman by the Forbes Magazine several times in a row and are even often listed among the most independent women and best role models for young girls.”

Felicity smiled. “That is true and makes me very proud.”

“Yet, you are married.”

Felicity perked up an eyebrow. “That is true, too.”

“Don’t you think there is a hard discrepancy between your reputation as a strong and independent modern woman of the twenty-first century here, but at the same time being a married woman and mother of four, especially given your success in the business world is only possible through your husband’s company?”

Oliver bit down on his tongue and narrowed his eyes slightly. He wished he could see the face of the reporter who had asked that question. If he wasn’t sure that Rick Coleman had moved away from Starling, Oliver would have sworn it was him. That idiot of a reporter had asked several of those terrible questions to him or Felicity in the past, making up rumors about them to spread to the world. He was the scum of the earth.

“I always have to laugh a little when I am asked questions like these,” Felicity answered with a smile. “The first thing I should make clear is that, for me as well as for every other feminist, being a mother and a successful businesswoman are not contrasts that are to overcome. Actually, one of the main things feminism is about is to stop the world from thinking in stereotypes when it comes to women. We don’t have to choose to be either wives and mothers or have careers. Nobody would force a man to make that choice because for them it’s okay and natural to have both. So, me being a mother of five and leading one of the leading companies of computer science and technology is not a contrast. It’s a look into the reality of many women today already and even more women one day in the future. We don’t have to choose because we can have both if we want to, and, if we don’t, then that’s fine too. It’s the choice of every individual woman how she wants to spend her life.”

Oliver smiled proudly. Not only had she answered him perfectly, but she had also all too casually made sure he knew that William was just as much her kid as every of the other four children they had. Like so often when feminists were criticized by non-feminists who just thought they were feminists the real feminism would win, just like it was supposed to be.

“That my professional success is only possible through my husband’s company is something I’d like to politely reject too,” Felicity said calmly. “I started working for Queen Consolidated before I even knew Oliver. I did work in different departments during my time there before the company was handed to Ray Palmer. I didn’t know him when he came to Starling either. Yet, he had heard of my work and trusted my abilities enough to make me vice president. When Mr. Palmer decided to give the company away, he wanted it back in Queen family hand. While Oliver and I haven’t been married yet we did see us as a team. I helped him getting used to the work and broke him in. The problem was that Oliver never really enjoyed the work at the company and, since he didn’t have a background of tech, his abilities were limited to the managing part. When, after his first mayoral candidacy, I asked him what he wanted to do, he said he wanted to be a stay-at-home dad and he wanted me to work at the company. So, yes, since it’s my husband’s company, it was easy to get to the head of it, but, on the other hand, I have been vice president before it was his or our company. I worked for the position I hold today, and, while it’s of course easier to manage balancing work and family when you are the boss, I think the progressions of Queen Incorporated shows that I am good at what I am doing. In the last years, Queen Incorporated has been more successful than ever. Led by Robert Queen, my deceased father-in-law, the company was successful, but as it had turned out later, involved in illegal business. Led by Walter Steele, the company struggled with the consequences of Robert’s death. Led by my husband for the first time, the company struggled with the consequences of the Undertaking and the danger within coming from Isabel Rochev, who took over the company for a short time. Only when Mr. Palmer took over the company stopped struggling and started tying onto the success it had before. Yet, the company has only become equally powerful and successful as Wayne Enterprise since I took over. Our concurrent is now our partner. In the last two years, we were able to hire another ten thousand people, most of them here in the US. We established employee-friendly guidelines regarding maximum work hours as well as paid vacation, maternity leaves and healthcare. Queen Incorporated is not only successful in the business world, but it also built its success without being borne by our employees. Queen Incorporated is where it is now because I was able to tie to past success and focus on innovation rather than damage control.”

“Daddy?” Tommy asked.

Oliver looked at his son and perked up his eyebrows. “What’s up, Buddy?”

“Is mommy angry?”

Oliver smiled. Of course Tommy could hear the slight tension in Felicity’s voice. As gentle and friendly as she sounded to people who didn’t know her, the truth was obvious for the people closest to her.

“No,” Oliver said honestly. “Mommy is just annoyed about the question because the reporter doesn’t understand how great mommy is at her work.”

Tommy nodded slowly and looked back at the TV. Oliver smiled at him for a moment longer before he turned his attention to the TV again too.

“Rather than from my husband’s company, I think my professional success is, to a high degree, dependent on my husband himself,” Felicity added. “I know that I am smart. I have good ideas and the strategical abilities to implement them. Yet, I know I wouldn’t stand where I am today if it wasn’t for my husband’s constant support and love. I wouldn’t have had the endurance to deal with defeat never mind the energy to work at all these projects with the strength and grit I did if it hadn’t been for him. He takes care of me and supports me and never holds the much time I spent with work against me. Having a family and a career like this wouldn’t be possible if I didn’t have the backing I receive through my husband. I consider myself a strong and independent woman, yet I wouldn’t be where I was today without him. That is also because he dealt with a giant spider that was blocking the door this morning.”

The reporters were laughing and so was Oliver. Of course she’d end a question like that with an amusing comment. She quickly thanked everyone for coming and left, ending the press conference abruptly.

“Mommy did great, right?” Tommy asked.

Oliver smiled. “Yes, she did.”

“Call!” Millie called out, clapping her hands.

“We should call mommy?” Millie nodded excitedly, making Oliver smile. “Come on, we call mommy.”


	277. Earned trust

“Do you always celebrate Christmas like this?”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows and looked at Tommy who was just opening two bottles of beer in his hands.

“We celebrate the holidays. It’s a holiday party, not a Christmas party. Hanukkah is over, but we keep it in our thoughts nonetheless.”

Tommy lifted his hands as if he was admitting defeat. “Okay, do you always celebrate the holidays like this?”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows again. “Like what?”

“Like all of this,” Tommy replied and gestured around the busy living room with the bottles before he handed one of them to Oliver. “This is kind of a big party. I mean I remember those Christmas parties at your parents’ mansion. This looks like a similarly big occasion even if it seems to be a lot more casual. Still, we always said we were going to celebrate Christmas only with our families which, at that time, meant you and me partying together.”

Oliver chuckled, remembering exactly how they had imagined celebrating their Christmas parties. They would have enjoyed spending comfort to the poor ladies that had had no one but them to celebrate the holidays with. Well, there were a lot of things they had probably thought were going to be fun when they had been in high school or college. A lot of those plans and ideas had been consequences of their parents’ busy life. Looking back, so many things they had done back then or said they would do now seemed surreal to Oliver.

They clinked their bottles and took some gulps. Meanwhile, Oliver looked around the room at everyone who was there to spend Christmas Day with them to celebrate Christmas as well as Hanukkah even if that had ended ten days ago already. Felicity was standing at the door to the terrace, bobbing a crying Connor up and down on her hip gently while she was talking to Iris’ dad Joe, who had come here for the holidays too for the first time again since several years if Oliver remembered correctly. Iris was sitting on the couch, talking to Laurel and John. Iris’ brother Wally was kneeling on the floor before Millie and Addie, juggling with apples to amuse the two girls. Kara and Alex, Barry’s friends from Earth whatsoever, were standing at the crib where Robbie, the youngest family member, was sleeping while Thea was telling them about the first weeks with her little baby boy. She asked if they wanted to hold the baby, but both of them rejected the offer quickly. Sara, Emmy and Tommy were playing a new game that Tommy had just gotten this morning with Ronnie. Lyla, Roy and Caitlin were looking at photos of Robbie on Roy’s phone. Cisco and Ray were eagerly discussing some tech ideas for Ray’s suit. William was talking to Barry, and Oliver realized it was probably the first time his oldest son met Barry since he had found out that his funny uncle was actually the hero he had admired as a kid. The only ones still missing were Quentin and Donna, but they had texted earlier that they were going to be late.

“We’ve been celebrating like this for years,” Oliver answered eventually and smiled. “It’s getting fuller with each year, but I don’t mind. The more, the merrier. Besides, in some way, these people are all my family.”

“Big family.”

Oliver cocked his head. “I have five kids in case you forgot.”

Tommy chuckled. “How would I forget. It’s something I ever thought I’d hear you say.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Oliver admitted with a sigh. While he was taking another sip of his beer, he noticed how Tommy was looking at Laurel, his eyes soft and filled with longing. “What about you?”

“What about me?” Tommy asked, quickly looking away.

“You’ve been back in the world of the living for some time now. Did you consider if having a family is something for you?”

Tommy snorted. “Me? No.”

“You’re sure?” Olive asked. “You are great with my kids.”

“Too much happened,” Tommy replied. He shot another brief look at Laurel before he turned to his best friend and shrugged his shoulders. “I think too much happened for me to ever come back from that and be healed enough to think having kids is a good idea.”

“Okay, I have never been actually dead,” Oliver said, “but I can tell you I have been at the point of thinking not having a family was better for me too and I couldn’t have been more wrong.”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe one day, but I don’t think so.”

“You have all the time in the world to think about it. It took me years to figure out what I wanted, needed and deserved, too. You will figure it out too and, no matter what, my family is your family.”

“Regarding Thea that’s really true.”

“It’s still weird we have the same sister.”

“And you had actually more time to get used to the thought than me,” Tommy said, shaking his head. “It’s still one more thing I never thought you’d say.”

Oliver chuckled, putting his hand to Tommy’s shoulder. “Wanna hear one more thing you probably thought I’d never say?”

“Shoot.”

“Excuse me for a moment, I gotta check the soup.”

“I am trying not to be surprised.”

Oliver chuckled and went to the kitchen. He put the bottle of beer to the counter and took a look at the soup he had made for lunch. Since they were going to have a rich dinner, they always ate soup or noshes for lunch. Today, Oliver had decided for soup. He stirred in the soup and breathed in the already delicious scent. After tasting a small spoon, he added some more curry, pepper and rosemary. He was just about to taste another spoon when Sara, Emmy and Tommy came into the kitchen.

“Hey, you finished your game with Uncle Ronnie?”

“Yes,” Sara replied. “He won.”

Oliver chuckled. He himself let the kids win a lot of the times, unable not to do so. He knew they needed to lose sometimes, but he was always happy when that happened as long as they were playing with someone other than him.

“What are you doing, Daddy?”

“I am trying the soup to see if something is still missing,” Oliver told Tommy and lifted the boy onto his arm. “Do you want to try?”

“I want to try too,” Emmy said immediately when her brother nodded.

“What about you, Sara?” Oliver asked his little goddaughter and she nodded.

Oliver got three spoons from the drawer and handed one to each of the three kids. He lifted one after the other, so they could reach the pot, and, after they had tried the soup, he asked, “So, what do you think? Is it good?”

“No,” Tommy replied immediately.

Oliver chuckled. “No? What’s missing? Mommy’s love?”

Tommy giggled. “No, Daddy!”

“No?” Oliver smiled. “What else is it then?”

“I don’t know the name.”

While the girls were already leaving again, uninterested to stay in the kitchen longer than necessary as long as there wasn’t any cake or other sweet delicacies, Oliver opened the spice shakers of the spices he had used and let Tommy smell on them.

“This one is missing,” he said after smelling at the curry.

Oliver nodded. “Okay, we add something more and-”

When the doorbell rang, Oliver stopped. He looked towards the hallway where Tommy, his friend Tommy, was just passing.

“Hey, can you take over here for me for a minute?” Oliver asked him.

Tommy stepped into the kitchen. “Sure. As long as I don’t have to do anything.”

“You don’t,” Oliver promised him and handed the younger Tommy over to his Uncle Tommy. “My Tommy here has everything under control. Just make sure he won’t overdo with the spices and doesn’t get hurt.”

“Alright,” Tommy said and nodded. “That sounds possible.”

When Oliver left the kitchen, the two Tommys were already busy tasting a little more of the soup. If anyone more would try it, there was probably nothing more left Oliver thought to himself with a chuckle while he was walking to the door. He wouldn’t mind, though. Those little moments of chaos were what was the most fun about having the entire family around.

“Hey,” he said when he opened the door to Quentin and Donna. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” Quentin replied and hugged him shortly.

“Merry Christmas,” Donna said too.

She hesitated for a short moment before she hugged Oliver, putting her arms around his neck and kissing his cheek. Oliver smiled gratefully and put his hand against the small of her back lightly. As soon as Donna pulled away, Oliver pulled his hand away. A moment of silence settled, and Oliver pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

The situation was still weird. After Donna had found out the truth about his secret identity and had told him that there had been a part of her that had wanted him to leave Felicity and the kids, it was just hard to come back from that. Oliver knew Donna still mistrusted him, at least to some degree. He couldn’t say he didn’t understand. He just couldn’t help it. He had no idea how he was supposed to earn her trust again.

“I’m gonna… put the presents under the tree for the kids to open later.”

“I am going to help you and-“

“No,” Donna interrupted Oliver and quickly grabbed his hand when he was about to help Quentin with the pouch of presents next to him. Oliver turned to her and perked up his eyebrows. “I need to talk to you for a moment.”

Oliver swallowed at the meaningful expression in Donna’s face. He felt his heartbeat quicken with nervousness about what she had to say to him. With held breath, she waited for her to speak. As soon as Quentin was out of sight, everyone in the living room greeting him joyfully, Oliver couldn’t take it anymore, though.

“I told you already that, if you need me to leave for you to forgive me, I am going to be a disappointment,” Oliver blurted out. “I know you don’t trust me. I know you want someone better for Felicity and for the kids, and it would be a lie to say there wasn’t some truth into that. There was a time that I thought exactly like this, and I swear I tried to keep my distance from Felicity, so she could have someone better, someone who deserved her, but I couldn’t, and she didn’t want me to stay away either. I cannot live without her anymore, and I know it’s selfish. I know there aren’t only good reasons why I stay with Felicity and the kids, but I will stay as long as they want me to, and if you think that is wrong-“

“Oliver. Oliver. Oliver,” Donna interrupted him with a chuckle, holding her hands up to make him stop and Oliver did. He held his breath once more, waiting for Donna to say something more. “You are worse than my daughter when you babble.”

Oliver faltered, but he chuckled eventually, even if it was a nervous chuckle. Donna smiled comfortingly and put her hand to his upper arm, stroking up and down gently.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Donna told him. She took in a deep breath and released it with a sigh, shrugging her shoulders. “I don’t know why it took me so long to see that you are still the man I trusted my daughter with in the first place, but I do see that again now. You are Felicity’s Oliver and that makes you my son. I don’t want you to leave Felicity or your kids, quite the opposite actually. I want you to promise me that you will always do your best to come home to them.”

Oliver still hadn’t processed her words when Donna already pulled him into her arms. Only after she had put her arms around his neck again and kissed his cheek, Oliver was able to loosen himself from being frozen into place. He put his arms around Donna’s waist and pulled her against his chest, grateful and relieved.

“I will. I promise,” he whispered. “Thank you,”

“You don’t have anything to thank me for,” Donna replied, stroking her hand up and down his back. “I just hope you can forgive me for being so… I don’t know.”

Oliver pulled back a little and shook his head. “There’s nothing to forgive. It’s all good.”

Donna smiled and stroked her hand over his cheek. “Good. I wouldn’t want to celebrate another holiday without being okay with my son, even if it’s not my holiday.”

“Did you have-“

“Granny!”

At Millie’s excited exclamation, Oliver and Donna pulled apart. Donna caught her granddaughter that was running towards her and lifted her into her arms, kissing her cheek.

“Hi, Sweetie,” she said. “Are you getting granny, so you can open your presents?”

Millie nodded. “And Tommy.”

“We need to get Tommy too?”

Again, Millie nodded. “Yes. He kitchen.”

“Oh, he’s in the kitchen, okay.” Donna smiled and leaned closer to Millie as if she wanted to tell her a secret. “How about we go to the living room and just open one of your presents already. Tommy can open his when he has finished cooking. Is that okay?”

Millie nodded eagerly. “Yes.”

Donna looked back over her shoulder to Oliver, who quickly said, “I’ll be there is a minute.”

Donna smiled and headed to the living room with her second to youngest granddaughter. Meanwhile, Oliver sat down on the stairs. He rested his elbow onto his knees and let his head fall forward. With a deep sigh, he closed his eyes.

He hadn’t really known how much the situation with Donna had burdened him until she had told him it was all okay now. His own parents were dead, and Donna was all Felicity had. She was as close to him as a mother could be, and he couldn’t be more grateful to have a mother in his life after his own had been killed. Besides, Donna had always been so happy that he had been with Felicity like Felicity could be so happy to have him in her life and not the other way around. While Oliver knew that he was much luckier with Felicity than she was with him it had been nice that Felicity’s mother, who wanted nothing but the best for her daughter, felt he added something good to Felicity’s life, something other men couldn’t give him. As much as Oliver hated the thought, he knew he partly depended on how other people saw him, especially his family. Felicity’s view on him was the most important thing to him, but Donna’s opinion of him did hold quite some meaning too.

Without opening his eyes, Oliver lifted his head back up and took in a deep breath. He could almost feel a lot of the stressed tension that had been in his muscles during the past weeks leaving his body. It was a good feeling, so he breathed in and out slowly a few times more. When his heckles rose and a warm shiver ran down the length of his spine, Oliver stopped and smiled, though.

“Didn’t you tell me that it’s creepy when I just stand there and watch you?”

“Once or twice, yes,” Felicity replied, and Oliver could hear the smile in her voice even before he opened his eyes and saw it on her lips. “There is a difference between me staring at you while you are sitting on the stairs and you staring at me while I am getting ready for bed in the bathroom.”

“I don’t see a difference there,” Oliver said innocently.

“Of course you don’t.” Felicity chuckled as she stepped a little closer. She stopped right in front of him and leaned against the banister, looking at him with perked up eyebrows. “Everything alright?”

Smiling, Oliver leaned forward and rested his face against her stomach. He closed his eyes once more and stayed like that for several moments. As soon as Felicity moved her fingers into his hair, he turned his head to snuggle his cheek to her flat stomach, though. His arms wrapped around her waist as he pulled her even closer to him.

“Your mom talked to me.”

For a brief moment, Oliver could feel Felicity tense. She relaxed again quickly, though, and asked, “How did it go?”

“We are good again now.”

Oliver sighed, feeling almost tired after all the tension had left him. The way Felicity’s warmth embraced him, and her fingers continued stroking through his hair could so easily lull him in. If it wasn’t for the guests they had, Oliver would certainly suggest a long, early nap today. He could use some good hours of sleep.

“That’s good news.”

“It’s great news.”

Oliver pushed his nose against her stomach shortly, breathing in the scent of her skin that reached through the red dress she wore. When he angled his head back and rested his chin against Felicity’s stomach, he found her eyes already on her. She was smiling at him gently, her face giving away that she was just as relieved as he was. Felicity always suffered with him just like he suffered with her. In a lot of ways, they were a unit, and as a unit they felt was the other was feeling and adapted to it. It was the same way like, when they hugged, their hearts stumbled a little in their chests and skipped a few beats until they found the same rhythm. It was kitschy and actually sounded humanly impossible, but it was true.

Felicity moved her hands from the back of his neck to his cheek. Holding his face in her hands with her thumbs stroking over his cheekbones like he was her greatest treasure, Felicity smiled at him for a moment. Eventually, she leaned in slowly. Their lips touched, meeting in a slow and soft kiss. Felicity pulled his bottom lip between both of hers, and Oliver sighed against her lips in response.

When they pulled apart, Felicity straightened back up. While her right hand moved back into his hair, her left fingers stayed at his cheek. She gently scratched her short fingernails through his stubble. He smiled at her contently.

“And you?” Oliver asked her. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, I was looking for you.”

Oliver smiled. “Let me guess, you realized I wasn’t in the living room anymore and started looking for me because you hubby-senses were tingling and telling you that I was in need of some comforting wifey-words, -hugs and -kisses.”

Felicity chuckled, letting her head fall back for a moment. With the incoming light from the window in the front door, her golden curls looked more like a halo than ever. Oliver loved that. It looked like she was an angel or a saving grace, his saving grace.

“No,” she replied eventually and kissed the tip of his nose. “I was actually looking for you because Baby Tommy and Uncle Tommy just added the entire pepper you put to the shaker this morning into the soup.”

Oliver’s eyes widened. “They what?”

Felicity puckered her lips and nodded slowly. “Yes. I tasted it. We need new milk now too because I emptied the entire bottle to soothe my mouth, and I actually still feel my tongue burning.”

Oliver got up and gently pushed Felicity out of the way to hurry to the kitchen where his friend Tommy as well as his son Tommy were waiting and looking at the soup. They both looked up at him when he stalked towards them and took one of the spoons to taste a bit. Felicity hadn’t overexaggerated with the soup.

“I told you not to overdo it,” Oliver said to his friend with a frown, trying to hold back a cough that revealed how much his mouth was really burning from the pepper.

“Yeah…” Tommy said slowly. He massaged the back of his neck with one hand and puckered his lips. “I had no idea that little pepper would be too much for that pot. I thought it wouldn’t hurt. Terrible judgement obviously.”

Oliver nodded, but it ended in an amused laughter. He shook his head and put his hands to his hips. He guessed it was bound to happen as Tommy hadn’t magically learned how to cook. Admittedly, his first tries had cooking had gone horribly wrong too.

“What do we do now, Mommy?”

Oliver didn’t have to shoot a look back over his shoulder to know Felicity had followed him and was now probably leaning in the frame of the door.

“Now,” Felicity said and stepped next to Oliver, her arms wrapping around his waist, while her eyes were staying focused on their son, “now we are going to order mini-cheeseburgers at Big Belly’s. Right?”

Knowing the last word was directed at him, Oliver turned his head towards her. With a chuckle, he kissed the tip of her nose and nodded.

“Right.”

Hadn’t he, only a few minutes back, thought to himself that little moments of chaos were what made these moments with family all the more precious? This – his son and his friend, both sharing the same name, messing up the soup after Oliver had thought they would never meet each other – meant the world to him, and it only made his Christmas better.


	278. Nostalgia

After ten minutes of looking for Felicity without success, basically searching the entire house for her without finding her or even just a trace of her, Oliver gave up.

“Felicity?!”

“I’m upstairs!”

Oliver frowned, looking right and left once more. He had already taken a look into every single room here. She wasn’t in the bedroom to nap or in her home office to work on something. Either he was blind which he doubted because Felicity was always the first he saw in every room, no matter how empty or crowded, or she hadn’t been there. The second possibility made a lot more sense, but it did make Oliver guess why Felicity said she was upstairs.

“Where?” Oliver asked. “I have been looking everywhere.”

“I’m on the attic.”

Oliver walked over to the small storage room where they kept bedding and such things. It was indeed the only room he hadn’t taken a look into because why would Felicity be here? They usually spent only two minutes in here to get a bedding for the kids’ bed. If he had taken a look, he had seen that the stairs to the attic were let down and know where Felicity was.

“What are you doing here?” Oliver asked as soon as his eyes were at the level of the floor and he was able to see Felicity’s calved. It dawned to him that he would recognize her calves as well as other part of her body. “I think I haven’t been here since… we moved here.”

Felicity frowned at him. “You were here to carry our old dining table downstairs for the holiday party only a couple of weeks ago.”

“Right,” Oliver admitted with a chuckle. “That is the only reason why I would ever come here. So, if you aren’t planning a secret party with over a dozen of guests, then why are you here?”

“Just… doing stuff?”

Oliver frowned. He had just reached the head of the stairs, and Felicity was standing with her back towards him, but there was something in the way she shrugged her shoulders that made him falter. Not saying a word, he watched her. She was standing in front of the very same table they had talked about half a minute ago. Though he could hear her even breathing, he didn’t miss the slight trembling of her shoulders whenever she breathed out.

Slowly, Oliver stepped closer. His gaze never left Felicity. As he walked around the table, he saw that she was folding baby clothes, Tommy’s old clothes to be exact. While they had donated a lot of the baby stuff – clothes and furniture and whatever – whenever the kids had outgrown them, even when they had known they wanted more kids, they had kept some pieces as reminders. When he was able to look at her face then, he saw the wetness on her cheek and the slight redness of her eyes. Worry filled him as both told him that she was crying even before another tear escaped the eyes.

“Hey,” he said gently, stepping behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close to his chest. He knew it comforter her the way it always comforted her. He kissed the side of her neck, his lips finding her pulse point and caressing it softly. “What’s wrong, Hon?”

“Nothing,” Felicity replied, not stopping to fold the baby clothes. She took in a sniffling breath. “I am just gathering some of Tommy’s old clothes, so Thea can use them for Robbie.”

Oliver nodded, his cheek resting against her neck. “That’s very nice of you.”

“I know.”

Though there was something amusing to how matter-of-factly she replied, Oliver’s frown only deepened. When Felicity reached out her hand for another piece of clothing from the box, after she had just folded a pullover with a Winnie-the-Pooh motive on it, Oliver grabbed her hand midair and turned Felicity around to him. Her eyes lowered, her gaze focusing on the hem of his shirt. Oliver frowned, put his fingers under her chin and gently angled her head back.

“Come on, tell me,” Oliver asked. “What’s wrong?”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath and shrugged her shoulders. “I just realized we are never going to have a baby again.”

Oliver frowned. “You knew that when I got the vasectomy, remember? We talked about this, and we made sure we didn’t want another baby before taking this step because we knew there was no coming back from it.”

“I did know that. I just-“ Felicity stopped and waved it off. “Forget about it. It’s stupid and-“

“Hey, hey, hey,” Oliver whispered, tightening his hold on her when she wanted to turn away. “There is nothing that’s stupid enough that you can’t tell me. So, tell me.”

Felicity hesitated for a moment, as if she wasn’t sure if she should really share it. Oliver moved his hands over her back and shoulders to the sides of her neck and to her face, so he could cup her cheeks. His thumbs were stroking over her cheekbones slowly, drying the wetness the tears had left. He doubted there was anything too serious going on or otherwise Felicity would have thrown herself into her work instead of hiding up here. Nonetheless, he’d always take seriously everything that made her cry.

“I just… When we agreed that it was time to find a permanent solution for the baby making, I was still so exhausted and still felt the consequences in the aftermath of the depression. I just saw the bright sides of not having another baby. I didn’t realize what we were giving up on.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows and smiled comfortingly before he teased, “I thought we were giving up on sleepless nights, stinking diapers and choosing girls’ names.”

Felicity snorted, and a smile spread on her lips for a short moment. “Yes, but we also gave up on introducing such a tiny, sweet human being into our lives. We gave up on watching our baby say its first work and take its first step or start to crawl.”

“We still have Addie,” Oliver said. “She didn’t do any of this yet.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment before she nodded. “Yeah.”

When she lowered her eyes, Oliver bit down on his tongue. They had said they were happy to be done with planning their family so often, he hadn’t taken her sadness now as seriously as he should have.

“Forget it. I told you it was stupid and-“

“No, no, no,” Oliver hurried to say, wrapping his arms back around her waist and keeping her against him when she wanted to turn around. “I am sorry. I’m really sorry, Felicity. I… tried to lighten the mood and… I’m sorry.”

He looked at Felicity, waiting patiently for her to say that it was okay. When she nodded slowly, Oliver smiled in relief. His lips touched hers shortly.

“So… Do you want another baby?”

“No,” Felicity replied. “Or maybe I do I… I don’t know.”

Felicity grabbed Oliver’s wrists and pulled his hands away from her waist. Freed from his grip now, she turned back around to the table and started folding the rest of Tommy’s baby clothes. Oliver pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants and slowly walked around the table to the other side, so he could see her face. A tight feeling formed around his heart and made his entire chest ache.

“Felicity, if you want another baby, we-“

“I-“

“I mean it’s okay if you do, but we gotta discuss our options then because we both know that, biologically speaking, I can’t-“

“I don’t know if I want-“

“Then maybe we have to discuss if we want to-“

“I don’t want another baby.”

Oliver stopped and frowned. He pushed his hands a little deeper into his pockets and hunched his shoulders. He couldn’t deny that this had all gone a little bit too fast for him right now. He felt a little lost because two seconds ago he had thought they were honestly discussing having a sixth baby, and now Felicity sounded like he had suggested the idea and it was the craziest idea ever.

“You don’t?”

Felicity took in a deep breath, smoothing the wrinkles from the onesie she had just folded together. When she lifted her gaze to look at Oliver, he saw the exhaustion and tiredness in her eyes. She shook her head.

“No, I don’t.”

Oliver’s frown deepened. “But just three seconds ago you said-“

“I know. I-“

Felicity stopped and shook her head once more. She walked around the table towards him and grabbed his wrists to pull his hands out of his pockets and wrap his arms around her waist. She entangled her fingers in the back of Oliver’s neck then and smiled.

“I am sorry.”

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Oliver assured her and let his hands travel up and down her back. “If you are considering this, then we should discuss it and-“

“I am not.” Felicity squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and sighed. “I don’t know what has gotten into me. Thea talked about how quickly Robbie is outgrowing his clothes, and I told her how normal that is. The first few weeks he had to change their clothes so often. Anyway, I offered to give her Tommy’s old baby clothes, and, while I started folding them together, I got nostalgic. I mean… Do you remember how it was to take Tommy home from the hospital?”

Oliver smiled. “Of course I do. He’s been crying nonstop, only stopping to drink and sleep.”

Felicity chuckled, resting her forehead against his chest. “Yeah.”

“I also remember how excited Emmy was. She wanted to know everything about babies and her baby brother in particular. She was giving everyone a hard time who didn’t treat her carefully.”

Felicity chuckled, leaning her head back. “Cisco was the one who had to suffer the most from it. He was so insecure around Tommy. When he first held him, I thought he was going to drop him.”

“I felt the same way. I was so close to yell at him, but Emmy bet me to it.” Oliver joined into her chuckled, remembering it exactly. “I had to put Emmy to bed when everyone was there to visit because she was so overexcited that she barely got any sleep.”

Felicity smiled for a moment longer before she scrunched up her nose. “Now that I said it out loud, I wondered why thinking about Tommy of all kids made me want to have another one.”

“Maybe because you’re his favorite parent, and you miss being a baby’s favorite parent.”

“I am Tommy’s favorite,” Felicity said proudly.

Oliver puckered his lips and shrugged his shoulders. “I felt I could leave one kid to you.”

“Oh, just one?” Felicity asked, perking up her eyebrows. “What about Millie and Addie?”

“Millie is undecided, Addie is definitely a daddy’s girl.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, of course. She loves me so much more than she loves you.”

“Okay, prove it.”

“Okay,” Oliver replied. “Let’s go and wake her from her nap. She will immediately reach out her hands for me.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Okay. Let’s prove it.”

Oliver puckered his lips once more. He had hoped Felicity would tell him to let Addie sleep. He knew as well as Felicity did that Addie didn’t have any preferences when it came to her parents, especially no preferences as strong as Emmy and Tommy had had when they had been babies. Addie came more like her older brother. She hated everything. She was a very dissatisfied baby. Admittedly, Millie had been the only easy baby they had had.

“Or maybe we wait with waking her up and go downstairs to cuddle with Millie a little.”

Felicity smiled. “I take that as you admitting defeat.”

“I can live with that.”

Oliver leaned down and captured Felicity’s lips with his in a short but gentle kiss. When their lips parted and their eyes locked, they smiled at each other.

“If you ever change your mind,” Oliver said quietly, turning more serious for a moment, “and you do consider having another baby, please tell me. You know you can talk to me about everything.”

Felicity smiled. “I will though I doubt that will ever happen apart from moments of freaking out. Anyway, even if I did, I didn’t know how we’d solve that problem.”

Puckering her lips, she gestured towards his lap, making Oliver chuckle before he shrugged his shoulders.

“I am sure we’d find a way.”

“Like?”

Again, Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Adoption or in vitro fertilization or maybe even surrogacy.”

Felicity frowned, cocking her head. “You sound like you have thought about that.”

“Not really, no,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “I actually just tried to figure out alternatives when we discussed having another baby after Tommy. I was trying to figure out a way to avoid pregnancy for you. I didn’t want to risk your health, and wanted to know if there were alternatives if we chose for a baby but against a pregnancy.”

“Through IV?”

“No, that was just a spontaneous idea.”

Felicity chuckled, stroking her hand over his hair. “You would tell me if you ever changed your mind too, right?”

“I won’t,” Oliver replied firmly, shaking his head. “If you said you wanted another baby, it’d be in. I would never change my mind from my own decision, though. We have five healthy children. No birth has been easy, and two pregnancies have been pure hell for you. I would never ask you to do that again and risk your health like that again or to give up the privilege of carrying our baby if the idea doesn’t come from you. If you wanted this, I’d consider it, but… why risk how lucky we got with our family so far by challenging fate?”

Felicity cocked her head. “And if you were married to someone else?”

Oliver rested his forehead against hers. “Never would have been possible.”

“Who knows.”

“I know,” Oliver said. He chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose. “Let’s go and see our baby girl.”

Felicity nodded. “Sounds good.”

Their arms wrapped around each other’s waists, they headed to the stairs. Before Felicity could take the first step down, Oliver pulled at her hand and pulled her against him, though.

“I love you, you know that?”

Felicity smiled. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“Good.”

“I love you too.”

Oliver smiled. “I know.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Oliver kissed the tip of her nose. “And it always makes me realize I am the luckiest man on the earth.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Their lips met in another kiss, both of them smiling. It was just another reminded how perfect they worked together. They were the perfect match, a thought he’d get nostalgic about even when they were living in a retirement house in fifty years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Since I started planning the new chapters, I could help with two quick questions.[Please do me a favor and answer them](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdhfjSCguOdkp2FCb9tQgYPGWnOK-83gzM5g6hxvk2XbXzFpA/viewform?usp=sf_link).**


	279. Legacy

“Is the entrance hall prepared for the reception?”

“The boss of the catering team just told me the buffet is all set up. They are currently preparing the trays with the champagne, water and juices.”

“Did Amelia arrive with her therapy dogs for the recovery room?”

“Yes. I gave her a keycard for the door to the parking area, so she had direct access to her car in case she needs anything or one of the dogs needs a break. Curtis made sure she has only restricted access.”

“What about the information video? You know, the one about dog therapy, social anxiety and special needs kids for the recovery room to make sure the room won’t be occupied by visitors and only used by people in need.”

“Curtis has just set up the monitors, and I instructed the security to keep an eye on unwelcomed intruders to make sure the visitors who are in need for the recovery get the break they need.”

“Did we find someone who can fill in for Martha today?”

“Actually, Martha sent us someone to fill in for her. Her name is Ida. She’s twenty-two years old, and she works at the public library in her semester breaks. She’s the perfect person to fill in for the Martha at the library here. She also has three nieces and eight nephews, so she is very good with kids.”

“Did you-?”

“Ask if she wanted to fill in more often in case it was needed? Yes. I got her address and contact details. We can contact her whenever we want.”

Felicity cocked her head, smiling at her assistant. “I am not paying you enough.”

“Oh, I am the last person to complain about money. I think I earn double as much as the usual assistant.”

“Possible, but you deserve every penny.” Felicity stopped walking up and down and sat down in the soft leather cushions with a sigh. “You know, if you want me to separate between my work at QI and the foundation more, so I don’t pull you into both of it. You just gotta say it. Both, the company and the foundation have grown so much over the years, I never expected there to be so much work and-“

“No, no,” Emily replied quickly. “I like being involved in everything because that way I can make better plans for your appointments and everything. Besides, it’s highly interesting to see the different sides of your work, but now that you talk about too much work I might have a suggestion or rather a request.”

Felicity’s smile widened. “After all the work you put into this, you can ask me for anything, and the answer will always be yes.”

“Well, I thought maybe I could have my own assistant. You know, when I started working for you or for Oliver actually, I was more like a secretary. I mean I managed the schedule and the post, ran smaller errands and whatever. I love having the responsibility to do so much more now, but I am working-“

“Emily, you don’t need to convince me,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “If you want an assistant, you will get one.”

Emily smiled with relief. “Not that there was any doubt, especially given you actually knew the name of every single person who is working here so far, but you really are the best boss one can hope for.”

“Better than Oliver?”

“Way better than Oliver.” Emily chuckled. “He’s nice to look at, but working with him is not easy. He’s not that much of an enthusiast for tech or office work at all, so work was a lot less busy, almost boring really. By the way, according to the text I just received from the security in the underground parking, your husband and kids just arrived and are on the way upstairs.”

Felicity smiled. “Thank you.”

Emily smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “I like my work. I will do a last check. You should be downstairs for your speech and to cut the red ribbon in ten minutes.”

“I will be in time. I promise.”

Felicity looked after Emily for a moment, smiling gratefully. These last few days, there had been a lot that had gone wrong. So short before the opening of the Science Center for kids Felicity hadn’t needed the stress. She had only managed to handle all of this because Emily had helped with it. After these past few days, Felicity would have given Emily five assistants if she had asked for it.

Before Felicity could get lost in her train of thought, a quiet _pling!_ echoed through the open hall and the elevator doors opened. Before Felicity could get up, Emmy and Tommy had already run towards her and thrown themselves at her. With one kid in each arm, Felicity leaned back into the leather cushions and kissed their heads.

“Aw! My babies!” Felicity said and gently rocked them from one side to the others. “Did you miss mommy that much?”

“More!” Tommy shouted in response.

“And daddy said you need comfort because you had to work so much these last days,” Emmy told her. She framed her mother’s face with her hands, mimicking her father’s tender treating of Felicity. “Today is your big day, Mommy. You are going to do great.”

Emmy kissed her mother’s lips gently before smiling at her again. Felicity smiled back tenderly, feeling lost for words. Though Emmy was almost seven already – where had time gone?! – she was still copying her father’s actions a lot. Felicity had thought it would pass once she started school, but, apparently, she had been wrong.

“Mama!”

At Millie’s outcry, Felicity turned her head to see the toddler pulling at the zipper of her jacket in an attempt to free her from the jacket. Kissing Emmy’s head once more, Felicity unwrapped her arm from her daughter’s shoulders and gently pulled at Millie’s hand.

“You don’t have to take that off, Cutie-Pie,” she told Millie. “We are going back outside soon and-“

“Mama, out!”

“No, we are going back outside soon. It’s going to be cold then and-“

“I could take Emmy, Tommy and Millie downstairs already, so they are distracted,” William suggested. “I mean at least Millie could use the distraction.”

“That would be great,” Oliver replied. “Thank you, William.”

“Yes, thank you,” Felicity agreed and turned to Millie again. “Hey, your older siblings are going to take you downstairs to show you the entrance hall. Is that cool?”

Millie hesitated for a moment, looking at her mother and then at William. When she nodded, she immediately stepped next to her oldest brother and reached out her hand for him to take hers. William did, and Millie smiled proudly, leaning against her brother’s leg.

“Emmy, Tommy, do you want to come with me?” William asked.

“Yes!” the answered in chorus.

While Oliver was pushing the button of the elevator for them, Felicity told William, “We are going to leave through the west entrance, so it will look like the main doors haven’t been used yet. If you take the elevator to the ground floor and head to the left in the direction of the robot area, you stride up right towards it. Wait inside, though. You never know what idiots the press sent.”

“Sure.” William smiled. “Good luck on your speech.”

“With how cold it is, it’s going to be a short speech,” Felicity said with a smile, “but thank you.”

Felicity waited before the elevator doors closed behind the four of her kids before she turned to Oliver, who was pushing Addie’s stroller back and forth with one arm. The nine months old baby was lying inside with her donkey snuggled to her side. Her little arms, barely able to move with the thick jacket she wore, were reached out for the chain with the wooden toys right above her face. She seemed content, but Felicity knew how quickly her youngest daughter’s mood could change, so she didn’t say anything to her.

Instead, Felicity looked at Oliver. His eyes were already focused on her, a gentle smile on his lips. Groaning lowly because she couldn’t deny that she was terribly nervous, Felicity went towards Oliver, wrapped her arms around his waist and straightened up onto the tip of his toes, so she could capture Oliver’s lips in a soft kiss. He responded to it immediately, his lips taking gentle hold of her bottom lip.

It was Addie’s low cry – Oliver must have stopped to push the stroller for a moment – that made them pull apart. They were smiling at each other while Felicity was continuing to lean against Oliver’s chest and his hand was rubbing up and down her back.

“Is everything prepared?”

Felicity nodded with a sigh. “Luckily. I have no idea how we made it. This morning I thought we were going to have the messiest opening since openings were celebrated.”

“I am sorry. I would have been here sooner, but getting Millie and Addie into their jackets has been hell. Once I turned my back on Millie, she always took off her jacket again.”

“Yeah, I know,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, knowing Millie hated to get into her jacket but that was okay because she was easy with everything else. She stroked her hand up and down his chest gently. “You couldn’t have done anything anyway. Besides, everything is ready now.”

Oliver smiled at her for a moment longer and nodded. Eventually, he took a look around to take everything in. “It’s really beautiful.”

Felicity nodded, smiling proudly. “It did end up even better than I imagined it to be.”

“Good thing you were the one in control.”

“Yeah.”

Oliver kissed the tip of her nose shortly before he tightened his arm around her waist and asked, “Is there anything I can do for you right now?”

Felicity pecked his lips and smiled. “No, not really. I will just get my coat and my scarf, and then we will have to go outside already.”

Oliver nodded. “I will take the kids outside already.”

“Can’t you come with me?”

“We are going to applaud for you when you come.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. “You hate me.”

“I love you.”

“You are not getting sex tonight.”

“You will be so tired, I wouldn’t get sex anyway,” Oliver told her amusedly. He kissed the tip of her nose. “When we are home, I will make you dinner, run you a bath, give your feet a massage and then you’ll already be asleep.”

“Maybe,” Felicity replied, “but I will do it with the thought in mind that I totally do not want to have sex with you.”

Oliver chuckled. “I can live with that.”

He kissed her lips once more, longer this time. Felicity knew he trusted her to handle this alone, and she also knew that he knew that she’d feel the safest if he was in the crowd and she could look at him. She also knew he felt the same way about her. Nonetheless, Felicity wished Oliver would stand right beside her or, even better, just give the speech himself.

“See you outside,” he whispered. “I’d wish you good luck, but I know you don’t need it.”

“Thanks.”

Their lips brushed together one last time before Oliver called for the elevator. Felicity waited until he stepped in before she turned to the admission department where she had left her coat and scarf. She put on both, knowing it was freezingly cold outside. Closing her eyes, she repeated the few sentences she wanted to say to the crowd later to herself now. Then she straightened her shoulders and made her way outside.

Felicity was pleasantly surprised that, when she turned around the corner of the building and stepped into the visual field of the reporters, they weren’t turning around and pushing their cameras into her faces to take photos and videos. Instead, they seemed to be focused on what was happening on the small platform that had been set up for Felicity to welcome the press and guests who had come here today. She had to take a few steps closer to that Millie had climbed onto the lectern enough, so she could look at the press. Oliver was standing behind her, making sure she wasn’t falling off and gently – as well as without success Felicity might add – trying to convince her of leaving the lectern.

As Felicity stepped to the lectern, the press people’s attention turned more and more towards her. Without reacting to it, Felicity stepped right to the lectern.

“I’ll do this,” she told Oliver.

With a smile, he kissed her cheek – making the reporters take a hundred of photos – and joined their other kids again. Felicity watched from the corner of her eyes to make sure she knew where he was in case she needed the sight of his face to calm her down. She lifted Millie into her arms then, kissing her cheek and sitting her down on her hip.

“You wanna stay with mommy?” Felicity asked.

Millie nodded. Instead of looking at her mother, she looked at the reporters, though, and waved her hand. Felicity could only smile about her daughter’s openness. After the reporters had scared her and her siblings to death when they had stalked them during Oliver’s arrest, Millie hadn’t hesitated to join Oliver during his press conference to officially confirm that he was continuing to run for mayor. She loved the press. She was going to follow into her daddy’s footsteps and become a politician one day. That or she was going to get married to a European prince.

Taking a short look around to orientate herself in the crowd – she could see Quentin and her mother as well as Tommy and Roy – Felicity took in a deep breath. There was no way to delay this any longer, so it was time to start. Hence, Felicity turned on the microphone.

“Hello,” Millie said immediately, her pacifier in her hand that she was waving excitedly.

While Felicity was laughing, the reporters applauded for Millie. Felicity was happy to have her little girl here with her. Millie was so calm, it calmed Felicity down. Speaking in front of so many people still made her nervous, no matter how often she had done it by now.

“Well,” Felicity said eventually, “after my daughter already welcomed you with all her sweetness my welcome greetings would look sad in comparison, so I will just skip that part. I could never win against her.”

The reporters chuckled, and Millie chuckled too though she probably didn’t know why. Eventually, she clenched her hand to a fist in her mother’s scarf and rested her head on her shoulder. Felicity used the moment, took another quick look around. She found Oliver’s eyes. As their gazes locked, Oliver gave her a short, barely visible nod of his head, wordless encouraging her.

“I did prepare a speech,” Felicity added, “but I guess you are as cold as I am, and I think we are all excited to see what surprises are waiting inside, especially for the many kids who have come here today which I am particularly happy about. Hence, all I am going to say is that children have a nosiness and a hunger to learn that a lot of adults can learn from. This Science Center for kids is supposed to help kids to see the magical and exciting things science can do, and it’s supposed to help every child, no matter where they come from or who they are, to experience science. Together with the scholarships QI is granting with the Queen Family Foundation, the Science Center is supposed to encourage people, especially those of low-income families who can’t afford expensive science programs, to get to know science and test and improve their abilities. We have experienced teachers and scientists here to help progressing kids’ knowledge and interest in science individually. To avoid pushing kids whose parents cannot afford any additional support for their kids out, the entrance is free for everyone. That is not just the case for today, but for every day that we will open. There are no charged offers. Every experiment you can do and every expert you can talk to, every workshop you want to sign up for – it’s all free of charge. We are happy for any donations we can get, but it’s no obligation. That’s all there is to say, so I’d like all the children who came here today to step forward, so together we can cut the ribbon.”

People applauded while the kids were stepping forward. There were several dozens of kids here, and it made Felicity happy to know so many had come. Curtis approached the group with a giant scissor and helped a few kids to lift it, so they could cut it together. Felicity didn’t even put a hand to the scissor, enjoying to stand back and watch. When the ribbon parted and the veil that had been covering the name of the science center so far, a hurricane of applause was to be heard.

All Felicity focused on was the expression on Oliver’s face, though. He was smiling proudly, applauding for her too, while he was pushing Addie’s stroller back and forth with his foot, so Addie wouldn’t get dissatisfied. Felicity smiled back. She could barely hear the applause because it didn’t matter to her. All that mattered was that Oliver was proud. She didn’t need any more.

For a long moment, everything went impossibly fast. Curtis and Emily as well as some other of her employees led the kids in to show them everything. Felicity had been supposed to do that, but she had known from the start that she would be too overwhelmed to do so. Not only was there a Science Center for kids, an institution that would have made being into science despite her mother’s trouble to afford their monthly rent so much easier for her, but it also carried the name _Smoak & Queen Science Center for children_. Felicity imagined it to be both, her and Oliver’s name, but she knew Oliver saw it as her maiden name and her name now. Anyway, a thing like this carrying any of her names meant the world to her.

While Felicity was still frozen in place, Tommy and Roy approached her. Roy apologized Thea’s absence, but apparently Robbie had given them a lot of trouble in the past days. Roy took Millie from her, and together they followed the rest of people inside.

A moment later, Oliver stepped to Felicity’s side, wrapping his arm around her waist and kissing her temple.

“You alright?”

“Yeah,” Felicity said quickly. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and shook her head. “Yeah, I am fine. It’s just a lot.”

Oliver kissed her temple once more. “I know. You’ll get used to it.”

“Yeah.” Felicity stared at the giant letters on the building. “I guess I don’t have much of a choice anyway.”

She and Oliver took the position next to the door, welcoming people who had come here today. Felicity was surprised by how many people actually showed interest. She hadn’t counted on such an interest.

After most people had entered the center, only she and Oliver as well as a couple of reporters were left outside. She guessed the few guys from the press hoped to get their information first and would just run in to take a few photos before hurrying back to their work places and write their articles, so they were the first to publish them.

When, instead of bombarding her with questions, they gathered around Oliver and asked him all the questions, Felicity rolled her eyes. Of course making this about the possible next mayor was a lot more interesting than thinking or talking about the chances that were offered to children here.

“Mr. Queen, how do you plan to support the education of children from low-income families when you are being voted mayor?”

It was one of the questions Felicity picked out clearly. There were a lot of questions asked about him and his candidacy. Some of them at least related to the science center, others ignored it completely.

Oliver wrapped his arm around Felicity’s waist, pulling her a little closer to his side. He then gestured towards the letters on the top of the building.

“You see those letters?” he asked. “That’s my wife’s maiden name and her name now. This is her day because this center has been her idea and a great one too. I am not answering any questions because this day is not about me or the candidacy. If you have any questions regarding the center, I am sure my wife is happy to answer all of them.”

Oliver looked at Felicity and she smiled happily. While she wouldn’t mind if he wanted to answer some questions about his candidacy, she was all the happier that he denied doing so and offered her the chance to say more about the science center. Indeed, Felicity answered some questions that were asked before the reporters disappeared, a lot sooner than she had expected actually.

“I guess the interest in the science center was limited,” Felicity whispered when she and Oliver were left alone.

“Maybe.” Oliver put his hands to her hips and turned her around to him. His lips brushed against hers briefly. “They were idiots, though.”

Felicity chuckled. “I won’t disagree.”

Oliver cupped her face in his hands gently, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. His lips brushed against hers shortly before he kissed her once more, a little bit more firmly. The third kiss was short again, ending with a gentle bump of his nose against hers.

“What you did here is great,” Oliver whispered. “I think you are the first person who makes really good use of the family foundation. You are planning projects, using your personal experience as well as the faults you recognize in the world to make this world a better place. My family used the foundation mainly for their reputation and image. You are using it to do good just because. No hidden agenda.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I come from a not-so-simple background with divorced parents and a low-income mother. Then I suffered from prenatal depression, so I guess I grew up and lived a little more in the real world than you or your parents did before the island and the Undertaking and everything happened.”

Oliver smiled comfortingly. “You are turning the bad that has happened to you into something great. It’s something I envy you for.”

Felicity cocked her head. “You took everything that happened to you on the island and turned it into something great too. Where do you believe I took this idea from?”

“Bruce Wayne?”

Felicity chuckled, throwing her head back. She wrapped her arms around Oliver’s neck and straightened up onto the tip of her toes.

“I like Bruce, but not that much. Besides, he lets his foundation run by Alfred. I also knew you before I knew Bruce, so, no, I took it from you.”

“Good.” Oliver brushed his lips against hers gently. Then he nodded to the building. “We should go inside.”

“Right.” Felicity pecked his lips before they walked into the science center hand in hand. Felicity bumped her hips against Oliver’s playfully. “By the way, Bruce is coming to Starling next week.”

Oliver groaned. “Can’t you find some other business partner?”

Felicity chuckled, squeezing his fingers. “No, but I promise you won’t have to meet him.”

“At least that,” Oliver grumbled before he looked at her and winked, wordlessly telling her it was all fine. He kissed her temple once more. “Now let’s go, so I get a glass of champagne and can forget about Bruce.”

Chuckling, Felicity rested her head against his shoulder and patted his chest. “Oh, my poor Baby. I promise when I wake up tomorrow and can feel my legs again, I am going to make you forget about him.”

Oliver puckered his lips. “I’ll turn down on the champagne then, so I am fit tomorrow.”

Felicity smiled. “I thought so.”


	280. Sexual harassment

When Oliver woke up from a humming sound that came from the en-suite bathroom, he immediately felt himself infected by that happiness. A wide smile spread on his lips even before he opened his eyes and could see Felicity swinging her hips in the rhythm of the melody she was humming. The hem of her red dress was swinging around her knees, moving with each of her movements. It was almost dancing around her legs in its own way.

It wasn’t long until Felicity turned around, switched off the light in the bathroom and stepped out and into the bedroom. She had stopped humming, but her hips were still swaying a little as she walked as if the music was stuck in her head. As soon as she had taken a couple of steps and realized that he was staring at her, she stopped, though.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Felicity said. She puckered her lips. “Did I wake you up?”

“You did,” Oliver replied with a smile and yawned, “but I don’t mind. I wouldn’t want to miss how my wife is dancing in the bathroom. It’s a wonderful sight to wake up to.”

Felicity smiled. She was starting to hum again as she crossed the distance to the bed, her hips swaying in an even rhythm as she came closer. She crawled onto the mattress and on top of Oliver then. Smiling, she leaned down and kissed him. Even with her lips against his, she still continued to hum, her lips vibrating against his. Only when their tongues met, it ended in a content sigh. Her hips were rubbing against his through the blanket, making Oliver groan into her mouth.

“You’re in a really good mood this morning,” Oliver whispered against her lips before capturing them in another kiss. His arms wrapped around her, his hands stroking down her back to her butt, encouraging the movements of her hips. “Why is that?”

“Addie slept through the night.” – She kissed his right cheek, the fingers of her left hands scratching through his stubble. – “I had sweet dreams of my husband.” – She kissed his left cheek, the fingers of his left hands moving down his necked chest slowly. – “Bruce is coming to Starling today.”

When she wanted to kiss his lips, Oliver turned them around quickly and trapped her between the mattress and his body. He looked at her with a mocking-angry glare, but Felicity only chuckled.

“Do you want to devil me?”

“I wouldn’t dare to.”

Felicity lifted her head from the pillow and pecked his lips. Oliver opened her lips with his tongue and brushed the knuckles of his hands against Felicity’s cheek. Her fingertips were stroking over his naked back. When Oliver pulled back to look at her, she wrapped her arms around his chest tightly and sighed, though. Oliver knew the expression in her eyes all too well.

“You have to go?”

“Yes,” Felicity said. She pecked his lips once more. “We will continue this as soon as I am home tonight, though.”

“Good.”

Oliver pressed a firm kiss to her lips before he rolled off her body. He watched Felicity crawling out of bed, smoothing the creases out of her dress and combing her hair with her fingers. She walked to the door and only turned back to blow a kiss at him back over her shoulder. Oliver winked at her in response.

When Felicity had left, Oliver’s smile widened even more. He loved when Felicity was happy, and it didn’t even matter why she was happy as long as she was. Even the fact that Bruce was the reason for her happiness didn’t bother him. After all, he knew that at the end of the day – literally at the end of the day – the one who would benefit the most from her happiness was him.

**→** **→** **→** **→** **→** ****

“Felicity?” Emily said, knocking at the glass door quietly. “Bruce is there. He went right into the conference room.”

Felicity thanked her with a smile before she took her documents and walked over to the conference room where Bruce was indeed sitting already. She wasn’t surprised that he had just went there like this were his office rooms. What did surprise Felicity a little bit after all was that Bruce wasn’t leaning back in the chair at the head of the table, grinning at her smugly, but actually preparing his own documents.

“Hey,” Felicity said as she entered the office.

“Hi,” Bruce just replied, his voice sounding tense. He didn’t look up, but continued focusing on the papers ahead of him. “I think we should just start as soon as possible. I am planning on being home before dinner and-“

“Busy days?” Felicity asked, cocking her head. “You could have rescheduled our meeting and-“

“No, that’s not necessary. Let’s just get this over with.”

Felicity didn’t miss how sharp his voice sounded. If the way Bruce’s shoulders tensed were any indication, he didn’t miss it either. He stopped with what he was doing and cleared his throat before he turned on the chair to look at Felicity, his eyes showing honest regret.

“I am sorry, Felicity.” He took in a deep breath, but his fingers were playing with his documents nervously. “I would like to go through these papers and get this over with quickly, so we can both go our ways again.”

There was a little bit of disappointment in Felicity. After she had looked forward to seeing Bruce again all week, his behavior was a little bit of a bummer. She guessed he was stressed which didn’t sound like Bruce at all since he always seemed to be a hundred percent in control about everything and a hundred steps ahead of everyone. It was the only explanation she had for his reversed behavior, though.

“Sure,” Felicity replied lightly. “Do you want anything to drink or something to eat or-?”

“No, thank you.” Bruce smiled at her reservedly and patted the documents in front of him. “Let’s just focus on work.”

Felicity nodded when she sat down in the chair next to him. “Let’s focus on work.”

For the next three hours they went through the papers that informed about the latest successes in their project and planned the next steps, too. The way they were going through everything and discussing some minor changes in the further plans, there really had been no need for Bruce to come here. They could have had this meeting via video call too. It wouldn’t have been any more or less effective.

Felicity watched Bruce from time to time shortly, wondering if there was anything more behind his behavior. Nothing came to her mind, though, so she tried to push the thought away and focus on their work.

By the time they were finished, Felicity’s head was almost spinning.

“So,” Felicity said, dropping her pen to her papers and leaning back in the leather chair with a sigh, “can I convince you to have a drink with me too? You could tell me about your stress. Unlike a lot of other people, I know the many burdens that are on your shoulders with Wayne Enterprise and Batman and everything. Maybe that helps.”

Bruce looked at Felicity for a long moment, honestly considering her suggestion it seemed. He shook his head, though.

“Thank you, but I should go back to Gotham,” he said. He held out his hand for her, and Felicity shook it. “Bye, Felicity.”

“Bye, Bruce.” When Bruce was about to let go, Felicity held his hand more tightly. “We will have a drink together the next time you are here, right?”

Bruce shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe. I can’t say when I come back to Starling the next time. I have to check on some other companies and… I gotta go now. See you, Felicity.”

He squeezed her hand once more before he turned around and left. Felicity looked after him with worry. She had never seen Bruce like that and wished he had just told her what was going on with him. That way, maybe she could have helped him. She understood a lot about stress at work and just as much about stress with family or stress as a vigilante and even some about stress of falling in love if that was the problem.

Anyway, with the way things were, Felicity knew there was nothing else she could do for him. When the doors of the elevators opened before Bruce, he shot a look in her direction. Felicity smiled and waved him goodbye. Bruce nodded in response and stepped into the elevator, disappearing from her sight.

“Well, that was unexpected,” she whispered to herself as soon as the doors closed behind her friend, “and disappointing.”

**→** **→** **→** **→** **→** ****

“Why aren’t you sleeping?”

Felicity stopped walking up and down to turn around to Oliver, who was leaning in the frame of the door and watching her with his hands pushed into the pockets of his shoulders. If the quiet look on his face was any indication, he knew that she hadn’t been waiting for him to come back from this night’s mission to start again where they had stopped this morning. Oliver just knew her better than not to see the difference between her nervous pacing up and down here now and the way she’d stalk up and down waiting for him to return to ambush him with her lust.

“I just can’t sleep,” Felicity replied. She sat down on the edge of the windowsill and shrugged her shoulders, gesturing around her head. “There is a lot going in here tonight.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “How come?”

Again, Felicity shrugged with her shoulders. “I don’t know.”

At that, Oliver frowned at her. He pulled his hands out of the pockets of his pants and walked over to her. He framed her face with his hands and angled her head back until Felicity looked at him. She saw the worry in his eyes and sighed, putting her hands around his wrists as she snuggled her face into his touch.

“What happened?” he asked. “You were so excited about seeing Bruce again this morning. What happened? Do I have to beat him up?”

Felicity smiled sadly. “No, I don’t think so. He just wasn’t in the mood for any bantering or anything, but work.”

“No flirting?”

“No. He said he was stressed, but he didn’t want to talk about it with me. I guess we are not the kind of friends I thought we were.”

Oliver stroked his thumbs over her cheekbones and looked at her comfortingly. “I am sorry your day wasn’t going as you hoped it was.”

“Really?” Felicity asked and perked up her eyebrows. “And I thought you’d be happy because I know you are not exactly fond of Bruce or about the kind of relationship we have.”

Oliver chuckled. “Flirting outside of marriage is not exactly a bad thing. It’s just a way to boost your ego a little and have some absolutely innocent and in no way objectionable possibility to have some fun.”

“Oh really?”

Oliver pursed his lips. “There was a time I was very insecure about myself and, hence, about us. I was also freaking out a little because, for me, the only reason to flirt with someone outside of my relationship was because I wanted to cheat, and we both know I have a lot more experience with that than I should have. Hence, I started googling why people flirt outside of their relationships and… yeah.”

Felicity cocked her head and leaned closer to Oliver. “I only love you.”

“I know that,” Oliver replied firmly. “I know that, and I don’t have any doubts about that. It’s why you won’t here me arguing with you. Whatever Bruce and you have, whether I like Bruce or not, it’s all fine because I know your heart is still with me, and I know you’d tell me if that ever changed.”

“It won’t.”

Oliver smiled. “I know.”

Their lips brushed together, and Felicity straightened up onto the tips of her toes. She leaned more against Oliver to stroke her tongue into his mouth. They both sighed in response.

“So, what are you going to do about Bruce?” Oliver asked her. “Will you go to Gotham and tell him that he needs to get his head out of his ass?”

Felicity chuckled. “No, I guess I will just wait until he comes around. Maybe I call him if he doesn’t reach out in the next couple of weeks. Speeches about getting your head out of your ass are spousal privilege.”

“Well, that’s fair.” Oliver agreed. “I wouldn’t want anyone to get into the enjoyment of your loud voice.”

“Enjoyment?” Felicity asked, playfully slapping his butt. “You are supposed to be terrified.”

“Oh, I am,” Oliver said quickly. “Terrified… and maybe a little turned on.”

“Turned on?” Felicity asked, slapping his butt once more. “I think I need to have a word with you, Mr. Queen.”

“Just one?” Oliver asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

Felicity chuckled. “Actually, there are two.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Shoot.”

“Get naked.”

“Your wish is my command.”

**→** **→** **→** **→** **→** ****

A quiet knock at the door made Felicity look up.

“Bruce,” she said with surprise.

Bruce was leaning in the door with his hands pushed into the pockets of his pants and his shoulders hunched. If his tousled back hair and the shadows under his eyes were any indication, he hadn’t slept much. Then again, there were so many wrinkles in his expensive suit that Felicity wasn’t sure if he had slept at all. At second sight, he almost reminded her of Oliver when he had played with her tablet or something and messed up the settings or whatever. Not that Felicity would ever say that out loud since she was sure that neither of the men would be happy about that comparison.

“You’re working in your lunch break?”

Felicity smiled and put the revised documents onto her desk. She pushed the last bite of her sandwich into her mouth and wiped her mouth with a paper napkin.

“It’s often the best time to work productively,” Felicity explained with a shrug of her shoulders. “Nobody comes over and asks for anything. Nobody calls. It’s all quiet.”

“It’s not healthy to work while eating, though.”

Felicity chuckled. “You sound like Oliver.”

Bruce put his hands to his chest. “My poor heart. That is not the comparison I deserve.”

“Hey, technically, it’s an amazing compliment coming from me. I married that man, and I am still happily in love with him.”

“There is some truth to that.”

While Bruce stepped into her office and crossed it to walk over to the seating area, Felicity watched him. Bruce still didn’t look exactly like himself. He looked nervous and almost a little shy. She wouldn’t usually use either of the words to describe her friend which only made her worry from yesterday return. With a low sigh, Felicity got up and sat down on the couch across from Bruce.

“What are you doing in Starling again?”

Bruce pursed his lips and moved his fingers through his almost shoulder-length, black hair. He leaned his upper body forward, resting his elbows on his knees. His eyes were calm as he looked at her.

“I felt I needed to apologize,” he said, “and explain my behavior yesterday.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lips. She wasn’t sure if he needed to apologize, but an explanation would certainly be nice. Otherwise, she would probably worry about him for quite some time longer. As much as she had tried not to, the worry what could be going on with Bruce had came to her mind some more times in the last twenty-four hours.

“So,” Felicity asked, “what was going on with you?”

Bruce looked down at his hands as he said, “I was unsure how to… behave… around you.”

Felicity frowned. “Why? We got along perfectly with the way things were between us.”

“We did,” Bruce replied, “at least until I was made aware that my behavior towards you could be seen as sexually harassing.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “What?”

“After our last bigger video conference with our boards and some employees actively working in the project, my staff manager took me aside and told me I should change my behavior towards you. She said that she cautioned a few employees for the same behavior, and I was risking a report of sexual harassment.”

Felicity looked at Bruce for a long moment, trying to process what he was saying, but she was unable to do so. Eventually, she frowned and, once more, asked, “What?”

“Sexual harassment can include unwanted pressure for dates. I love asking you to come over to Gotham for a weekend to celebrate with me. It can include sexual teasing, jokes, remarks or questions. I do tease you or make jokes and remarks or even ask questions of sexual nature. It can include turning work discussions to sexual topics. I do that. It can include asking personal questions about social or sexual life. I do ask about your marriage possibly ending and your husband possibly not being able o give you what you want or need in matters of sex. Sexual harassment can also include comments about a person’s clothing, anatomy or looks, and we both know-“

“Okay, stop,” Felicity said, lifting her hands in front of her. “You really think you are sexually harassing me?”

Bruce pressed his lips together for a moment. “I didn’t at first. I didn’t at first. If I had, I would have never acted the way they I did. I mean… I never wanted to make you feel uncomfortable, especially not like that. I always considered it a little bit of teasing between friends and partners and maybe a little bit of teasing towards Oliver since he and I weren’t exactly the best friends. I am sorry I made you feel uncomfortable. It was never my attention, and I understand if you want me to find someone who is going to represent Wayne Enterprise’s interests from now on, or if you want to quit the projects completely. I mean I-“

“Bruce, stop, stop, stop,” Felicity urged him.

Once more, she was holding her hands in front of herself defensively. Squeezing her eyes shut, she thought about what Bruce had told her. All the behavior he had said was sexual harassing was indeed things that reminded her of him. Still, she would have never considered his behavior sexually harassing towards her. Sure, Bruce was flirting with her, and he was probably quite aggressively about it, at least at times. Felicity had never felt really uncomfortable about it, though. She had asked Bruce to turn it down sometimes, especially when Oliver was around, but…

“Okay, I know you like to flirt with me which obviously I kind of enjoy because otherwise Oliver would have probably hunted you down and snapped your neck already-“

“He would have tried,” Bruce corrected her, “though I am confused why he wouldn’t snap my neck when you enjoy it.”

“Because Oliver trusts me,” Felicity replied. “He knows I would never cheat on him, and I am actually sure that you know that too.”

“Which makes my behavior unwanted flirting which is part of sexual harassment too.”

Felicity sighed. “We both know it’s not completely unwanted. I enjoy some innocent flirting, and, while I agree that behavior like that could be sexually harassing and probably would be if other men spoke to me like that, I don’t feel that way about you.”

Bruce looked at Felicity intently, searching her face for any doubt. Only when he seemed to be unable to find something, he asked, “Why?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I know you would stop if I asked you to.”

“I remember the one time I was helping your team with a missing, and you sent me home because I didn’t stop.”

“You didn’t stop teasing Oliver which is a completely different thing,” Felicity told him. “I know that you don’t really want anything from me. I also know that the moment I’d accept your sexual offers, you’d back out. I mean… how many times did you tell me that you respect me after a little flirting, and that I should tell you when you are going too far?”

Bruce shrugged his shoulders. “Probably a few times.”

“More than just a few times.”

Bruce looked at her, but he quickly lowered his eyes. Felicity watched him silently, actually feeling sorry for him. She understood now what had made him behave so weirdly around her yesterday. If he had tortured himself with the thought of all of this in the past days since their last video conference, she wasn’t surprised. Felicity had always felt like there could be a thin line between flirting and sexual harassment. The major factor in this was that flirting was wanted, harassment wasn’t. She didn’t doubt that harassers knew exactly if what they were doing was wanted or unwanted, and good guys like Bruce made sure it was okay instead of sticking to their behavior. It was one more reason why she trusted him.

“So, what do we do know?” Bruce asked. “I cannot continue with how we were around each other in the light of this.”

Felicity nodded slowly and shrugged her shoulders. “I guess that means less flirting and more being friends? For real?”

Bruce smiled. “I would like that.”

“I would like that too,” Felicity agreed with a smile of her own.

There was a long moment of silence that they just looked at each other, both relieved about the new basis of their friendship. Eventually, Bruce nodded to the door.

“I should go. I have a lot of work in Gotham.”

Felicity nodded and got up when Bruce did too. She walked over to him and hugged him closely, kissing his cheek.

“See you again soon, Friend,” she said, putting emphasis to the last word. “And, for the record, you are allowed to still compliment my clothing and my body. Your hurt my dress’ feelings yesterday.”

“Oh, I am very sorry. I will apologize to it the next time.”

“You should,” Felicity agreed.

“See you again soon, Friend,” Bruce eventually said. He pulled out of the hug enough to look at her. “And thank you, Felicity.”

“No thanks needed,” she assured him.

There was a quiet knock at the door that made Felicity and Bruce both turn around to see Oliver stepping in. Immediately, Bruce took a step back, his hands falling off her back.

“Hon,” Felicity said with surprise.

“Hey,” he replied. “I wanted to check if you were up for lunch, but I see you got company.”

When Oliver shot a look in Bruce’s direction, he quickly walked over towards him and held out his hand. “Hi, Oliver. Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied, shooting a brief look at Felicity, tried her best to communicate with her eyes that he should behave. Apparently, Oliver got the message because he turned back around to Bruce. “Yes, a lot to do with the candidacy, protecting the city by night and the kids and everything, but Felicity and I got it handled somehow. I am surprised to see you here so soon again.”

“I had some… stuff… to talk about to Felicity,” he said. “Maybe Felicity should tell you. I gotta go back to Gotham. Bye.”

“Bye, Bruce,” Oliver replied.

“Oh, by the way,” Bruce said, turning around at the door, “Felicity’s lunch was a sandwich while reading a report, so don’t let yourself be fooled.”

“So much to being my friend,” Felicity mocked Bruce. “Traitor.”

Bruce chuckled. “Just making sure you get what you need.”

While Bruce was leaving to the elevators, Oliver came towards Felicity. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her lips gently. Felicity sighed, leaning against him and putting her hands to the back of his upper arms.

“Did you two have sex?” Oliver asked with a teasing glint in his eyes.

Felicity chuckled. “And here I was telling Bruce you trusted me enough to know I wouldn’t cheat.”

“That was before Bruce was nice to me.” Oliver kissed the tip if her nose. “What did he want?”

“Apologize to me.”

“For yesterday?”

“And for sexually harassing me.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “What?”

“Yeah, that was my reaction too.” Felicity sighed. “I’ll get my coat, so you can take me to Big Belly’s for some ice cream. I will tell you everything then.”

Oliver nodded. “Sounds like a good plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I have written 10 out of 15 chapters for my new multi-chapter _[Another chance on love](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/170082008355/another-chance-on-love-coming-feb-3rd)_. You would really help me if you could answer [this quick survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe9oGHJTc-vuNWSRDCkx7P0in7j1aKGBFsXEZpsj2CMPKb66w/viewform?usp=sf_link) to help me out with deciding what story to work on next.**
> 
> **By the way, you chose against Felicity killing the next bad guy, so you get the “lighter” angst, but it’s still very angsty. ;)**


	281. Sexual openness

When Felicity saw Oliver pulling into the parking lot next to her, she stopped typing the text she had wanted to send him. She let her phone fall into her purse and got out of the car, already moving around it to the other side where Oliver was.

“Hey,” she said with surprise and pecked his lips shortly. “What are you doing here?”

“I was actually about to ask you the same,” Oliver replied. “I got a text from Quentin. He asked me to come here at three because he needed to talk to me about something.”

“He texted me the same.” Felicity frowned. “Did you upset my mom? If there is any reason for him to call us to the precinct in the middle of the day to talk to us, it’s probably because of my mom and-”

“No, I didn’t. You mother and I get along great again since Christmas.” Oliver shook his head quickly. “Did you upset your mom?”

“Not that I know of.”

Felicity puckered her lips and tried to remember the phone call she had had with her mother yesterday. They had chatted about her work and about the kids. Her mother had complained about not seeing them enough. Since Raisa had joined the Queen Family, they weren’t in need of a babysitter that much anymore. Hence, their friends and family weren’t asked to spend time with the kids that many times anymore. Felicity had offered to bring the kids over for a sleepover at the weekend, and her mother had agreed. It had been all very civil, no fights or anything that could have upset her mom.

“Let’s go in and see what he could want,” Oliver suggested. He laced his fingers through Felicity’s before he tugged her inside. “It can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, don’t say that.” Felicity sighed. “Our lives are too crazy for nothing bad to happen.”

While Felicity was counting in her head how many times they had thought nothing too bad would happen and something terrible had happened after all, Oliver just squeezed her hand and smiled. Knowing he wanted to calm her down, Felicity just dropped her head against Oliver’s shoulder with a sigh. At least she knew that Quentin hadn’t called them here to arrest Oliver. She was pretty sure he would have warned them instead of calling them to the police if anything like what had happened last summer was about to happen again.

Felicity and Oliver had just stepped into the large open office where Quentin was talking to one of his officers when he looked in their direction. Felicity lifted her free hand with a smile, waving towards him. When Quentin just ended the conversation that he had been in abruptly and nodded towards his small office, indicating with a nod of his head that they should follow him, Felicity frowned, though. She shot a look at Oliver, who just shrugged his shoulders.

Eventually, they followed Quentin into his office. While Oliver was closing the door behind them, Felicity already took a seat on one of the two chairs across from Quentin. Oliver sat down next to her. Yet, nobody said a word.

“So,” Felicity said slowly. She puckered her lips for a moment. “What are we doing here?”

Quentin pressed his lips together for a moment. He straightened his shoulders, making himself as tall as possible in the sitting position. He almost looked like he was about to explode from whatever he didn’t tell her.

“Do you two want to get arrested?” he asked, cocking his head slightly. “Have you spent so much time with criminals that you made friends with them and want to visit them for a while? Or did you just think that with five kids, it doesn’t hurt to get a little timeout and, since going on a vacation without the kids might look weird, you thought a little trip to jail could be better?”

Felicity frowned and tried to think about what he could possibly mean. Since Oliver had gotten arrested, they had been even more careful in the field. With Oliver’s candidacy, they had also tried to keep the buzz about him, his past and their family to a minimum. It wasn’t easy, especially given his parents’ connection to the terror attack that the Undertaking had been, but they were doing their best. Thanks to Felicity’s tech skills they were even quite successful at it.

Felicity shot a nervous look towards Oliver. He seemed to be just as much in the dark about what Quentin was talking about as she was.

Clearing her throat, Felicity turned back towards Quentin. “What?”

Quentin didn’t take his eyes off them as he opened the topmost drawer and pulled out a brown envelope. He put it on the desk between them and intended with a nod of his head that they should open it. While Felicity continued looking at Quentin, Oliver took the envelope and opened it. Felicity was still guessing what all of this meant when Oliver sucked in a deep breath.

“What?” Felicity asked, turning towards him now. When she leaned closer to him, looking over his shoulder to look at whatever had been in that envelope, she gasped for breath. “Oh my God!”

She quickly snapped the bunch of photos from Oliver’s hands and pressed them against her chest. Of course she knew it was already too late. Quentin had certainly seen them already. Yet, it was a reflex she couldn’t stop. Felicity squeezed her eyes shut, willing them to be unseen.

Felicity was used to embarrassment in her life. As the nerdy girl with freckles and glasses, a mother who was working as a scantily dressed cocktail waitress and a basically non-existing brain-to-mouth filter, she had always been destined for embarrassment. It had gotten a lot better, though. Adult life was just so much kinder towards her because she was surrounded by lovely people who appreciated her smartness even though it came with some messiness. Anyway, apparently life had had this one big embarrassment up her sleeve, waiting to play this card the moment she’d least expect this. Having her almost-stepfather seeing photos of her and her husband having passionate sex in the ocean was not only surprising. It was also a whole new level of embarrassment.

“Where did you get these?”

Felicity looked at Oliver with an expression of incredulity in her eyes. She was still progressing this whole thing at all, while Oliver was already talking about it all too casually. Apparently, he had jumped the steps of being embarrassed and apologizing about it to Quentin until he was okay with this incident and able to forgive them. Yet, Oliver talked like this was old news and something to joke about by now. When Oliver noticed her gaze, he just shrugged his shoulders.

“Your favorite paparazzi, Rick Coleman, came to my office today and wanted to report you for scandalization and God knows what.”

The name of said paparazzi made Felicity release a strangled sound. At the same time, Oliver growled. Rick Coleman had been the very same paparazzi who had annoyed their family for quite some time now. During Oliver’s first candidacy, when Felicity had fallen down the stairs during a gala and Tommy had been forced to be born in an emergency C-section to save both of their lives, Coleman had right out asked Oliver if that had been part of promoting himself through his family. In the same sentence he had also mentioned Thea’s abduction through Slade during Moira’s candidacy. Oliver had wanted to punch him back then already, but he had been able to keep a hold on himself. Only when Coleman had come back to spread rumors about Felicity cheating on Oliver with Ray, who he also made out to be Tommy’s father, and her being a gold digger and God knew what else, he had confronted him. Since he had done so as the Arrow, Coleman hadn’t wasted a second and immediately changed his story to saying Felicity was cheating on him with the Arrow. Felicity had actually believed that he had moved away, but she must have been wrong.

“And what did he really want?” Felicity asked eventually. From the corner of her eye, she could see Oliver turning his head to look at her with a frown. “I mean these photos were made in summer and-“

Quentin quickly lifted his hands to stop Felicity before she could say anything more.

“Really, I know more than I want to know about this all,” he said, screwing up his face. “I really do not need further details.”

Felicity pressed her lips together and pulled them into her mouth. Of course Quentin was right. The almost pornographic nudes were more than he should have ever seen of his stepdaughter and her husband anyway. Feeding him the details of how this had been the day of that interview with the terrible Dragon Lady when Oliver had decided to go to their beach house with Felicity to spend a great evening together after they had been rushing from one appointment to the other without any time for each other was unnecessary. That they had used the last warm days of the year to go skinny dipping, and it had kind of escalated quickly wasn’t necessary either as he had visual proof. Saying that they had been sure that nobody was there to watch them wouldn’t help either, especially since it was obvious that they hadn’t been alone despite what they had thought.

Anyway, since the photos had been taken in summer and it was January by now, Felicity doubted that Coleman had really wanted to report them. If had wanted to report them to create some drama while having all the first-hand information, he would have either done so immediately after this night or as soon as the buzz about Oliver’s arrest had ceased. Doing this now, so far delayed, seemed tactic.

“So, what did he want?” Oliver repeated Felicity’s question.

“At first, I thought he wanted to create buzz,” Quentin said, “but even I, without being a genius, figured his timing was suspicious. Luckily, Coleman doesn’t seem like the brightest candle on the cake, and he did seem to be in a hurry, too.”

“I guess it wasn’t much of a coincidence he came to you either?”

“No, it wasn’t.” Quentin leaned back in his chair. “Apparently he had more tickets than he could pay and was actually about to lose his license. He gave me the photos. I made sure the tickets would get lost, and he could keep his license.”

Felicity frowned. “Seems like a small price for these photos. A few months without his license wouldn’t have been too bad. He would have earned so much money if he had published these. I mean, not only do Oliver and I look incredibly hot together, we are also people of interest. This would have crossed a lot of the plans for the candidacy because it would have made Oliver look… well… still highly attractive, but probably not too attractive as a mayor.”

“I actually wondered about the same thing and did some research. It turns out he is working for a new channel who is owned by Deckers Entertainment, a company that was recently bought by Wayne Enterprise.”

“Huh,” Felicity made. “Bruce didn’t tell me anything about it.”

“I guess Coleman was smart enough to not even try getting these published with Mr. Wayne in charge,” Quentin said.

“Well, I guess I will make sure Bruce will know exactly what kind of people he is employing then,” Felicity said. “I guess Bruce will make sure Coleman never has a job in the media world again. Why do I have a friend who’s almost like owning the entire world.”

“I will go and put the fear of God into him later to make sure there aren’t any copies or negatives or digital-“

“Don’t worry,” Quentin said. “I am sure there isn’t. He knows if he publishes them, I will make sure he’s getting arrested for things that will get him a few long years in Iron Heights, and I will personally fake all the evidence needed.”

“Thank you, Quentin.”

Quentin growled. “Don’t get used to this.”

“We won’t.” Felicity smiled quickly, wanting to end this situation as quickly as possible. “Can we go now?”

“No,” Quentin replied firmly.

He got up and put his hands to the desk, looking at the two of them with serious eyes. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip.

“I hope you two know that, technically, Coleman was right,” he said, “and, if it had been anyone else coming here to report you, I would have been forced to file the report against you. If it had been anyone else on that photos, I wouldn’t have even felt bad about it. Really, guys, you have your beach house right there. There could have been kids who could have seen you.”

“We know that,” Oliver said, “and it will never happen again.”

“I hope so,” Quentin said. Though he was still looking at them seriously, Felicity believed she could see the slightest of an amused spark in his eyes. “And now you will leave my office, and we will never talk about this again.”

Felicity nodded quickly. “That sounds fair.”

“Thank you, Quentin,” Oliver hurried to say before he up too and followed after Felicity.

They walked out of the precinct as quickly as possible. Though Felicity still felt embarrassed, she couldn’t help but also be amused about this. As soon as the door fell shut behind them, Oliver and Felicity both started laughing, holding their hands.

“Oh my God, this was terrible,” Felicity said, still chuckling. “Poor Quentin.”

“I think if I would ever have to see photos of one of our daughters having sex, I would kill that guy,” Oliver said.”

“I think Quentin is used to the thought that you are having sex with his daughter.”

Oliver screwed up his face for a moment before he wrapped his arms around Felicity’s waist and captured her lips in a gentle kiss.

“Only one,” he whispered then and nuzzled her nose.

Felicity smiled. “Right.”

She pecked his lips once more before she took a step back and started pushing the photos into her purse.

“I am going to burn these as soon as we’re home tonight,” Felicity said. “It’s-“

“Hey!” Oliver complained and quickly snapped some of the photos from her fingers. “We’re married. Half of these photos are mine. You can burn your half. I am going to keep mine.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “You want to keep photos that prove that someone watched us having sex?”

“I want to keep photos that show us having sex at all,” Oliver corrected. “The voyeur aspect is a bitter pill, but I gotta take what I get.”

Felicity puckered her lips and stepped a little closer to Oliver. She moved her forefinger over his chest and smiled seductively.

“We could make our own photos.”

“We could?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “We could, but only if I get these.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes. “I am not sure I can trust you.”

Felicity puckered her lips. “No risk, no fun, Honey.”

Oliver hesitated for a moment before he handed the photos to Felicity. She quickly dropped them into her purse and unlocked her car to throw the purse on the passenger seat. She pecked Oliver’s lips once more before she was about to get into her car.

“Felicity?” Oliver asked, making Felicity turn around once more. “I won’t get photos, right?”

Felicity grinned. “Right.”

Oliver sighed. “I love you anyway.”

Felicity blew him a kiss. “Love you too.”


	282. The hot mom

Felicity groaned when the traffic lights went red right in front of her. The traffic through the city had been hell, so she was already twenty minutes late for picking William up from school. She guessed letting her pick him up from school was not saving him any time compared to taking the bus home today. Who knew, maybe he had already figured that she was late and had taken the bus nonetheless.

The parking area was almost completely empty when Felicity directed the car into a free parking lot. Even the teachers must have already called it a day and left. Felicity puckered her lips and looked out of the windshield, but the school commons was completely empty. After only a moment of consideration, Felicity got out of the car and took a few steps into the direction of the school building. When that still didn’t get William into her visual field, she pulled her phone out of the pocket of her coat, still continuing to look for him.

“Hey, Felicity,” he said as soon as he had taken the call.

“Hi, William. I am so sorry. I got out of the office right in time, but the traffic was hell. Anyway, I am at your school now. Are you still here or did you take the-“ Felicity had just rounded the corner when she saw William sitting on one of the ping-pong table, three friends standing close to him. “Oh, I can see you.”

When William turned his head in her direction, she waved at him and ended the call. She pushed her phone back into the corner of her coat and approached William and his friends. They seemed to be having a good time, chatting and laughing. Before Felicity got to reach them and introduce herself to William’s friends, he had already grabbed his jacket backpack and was hurrying towards her.

“Hey, you can have five more minutes with your friends if you-“

“No, it’s fine.”

“You’re sure? I can wait in the car and-“

“No, let’s just go.”

“O-okay,” Felicity agreed.

She waved to William’s friends briefly before she turned around and followed William. With his large and quick steps Felicity almost had to run to keep up with him. With her high heels on and the uneven asphalt, that was a lot easier said than done.

“Everything alright with you?” Felicity asked between her pants for breath.

“Yes,” William replied, still not looking back.

“Then why are we running?”

“Wha-“ Only now that he was taking a brief look back over his shoulder, William seemed to be realizing how quickly he had actually walked. He slowed down. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Felicity said, shrugging his apology off. She took in some deep breaths, holding her hand to her side against the side stitches. She did cardio, thoroughly trained by Oliver whenever they got to sneak away or the kids were asleep. Sports on the mattress was the kind of sports she liked. Running and all the other weird training Oliver was sometimes trying to convince her of wasn’t hers. She’d like self-defense, but Oliver was hesitant on teaching her. He didn’t like to see her doing that, so Felicity depended on the rest of her family and friends to do that. Anyway, back to the topic. “Are you sure everything is alright? Did you have problems with your friends? They were your friends, right?”

Felicity tried to recall the situation of before. She definitely didn’t know any of the boys William had talked to. She usually had a good memory when it came to face, but she couldn’t remember seeing these guys around William before. He wasn’t in this school this long yet, so Felicity wasn’t particularly surprised and-

“Yes, they are my friends,” William replied, “and everything is fine.”

There was something about his tone that told Felicity that William didn’t want to talk about this anymore. Her boys just weren’t the most talkative guys. Tommy just didn’t talk much, rather looking at his stars when something was bothering him. Even Oliver had needed years to open up more, and yet there were still things he’d rather solve himself before talking to her. Felicity was sure that if she turned deaf one day, she could still have long conversations with Oliver. She had learned to interpret his mimics and listen to them like to his words.

“Your dad is trying a new casserole recipe today,” she said instead.

“The broccoli-chicken one?”

“I think so.”

“Cool.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, unlocking the doors of the car. “I don’t know what I did wrong with you kids that you prefer a casserole with broccoli over the one with the pizza sauce. Honestly, it’s your father’s bad influence with all his looking out for health. I grew up with junk food, and I turned out to be a genius.”

“Honestly?” William asked.

“I know, I know. You just love broccoli, and your siblings just repeat after you.”

William chuckled. “Is that what dad told you?”

“Yes, why?”

“Because he promised them ice cream for dessert if they agreed to the healthy broccoli chicken casserole instead of your favored recipe.”

Felicity looked at William with played anger. “I guess your father is in for a night on the couch tonight.”

 

 

“Oh my God,” Felicity panted, holding her hand to her heart. “This was-“

“Amazing enough to take back my punishment of sleeping on the couch tonight?” Oliver asked as his head snuck out from under the blanket.

Felicity moaned, wrapping her legs around Oliver’s hips loosely. She grabbed the hair at the back of his head to pull him down while she was lifting her head from the pillow at the same time. Their lips met in a passionate kiss. His lips still carried her taste. It made Felicity moan out once more. After the amazing orgasm he had just given her, all her senses were unbelievably sensitive.

When their lips parted, Felicity’s head sank back to the pillow. Meanwhile, her hand moved down Oliver’s chest playfully. Her fingers spread against his abs.

“One more orgasm, and I’ll think about it.”

“Oh, I will get right back to work and-“

“No, no, no,” Felicity hurried to say. She pulled her leg closer for a moment, so she could put her foot to Oliver’s hip and roll him off her. “I need to get some water before I am ready for round two.”

“I will refresh myself in the meantime,” Oliver said.

“Oh, I like to see this enthusiasm.”

“Honey, I’d do anything to spare my back the night on the couch.”

“You are getting old.”

“Hey, I’ll show you how young I am when you are back here.”

Felicity chuckled, rolling out of her and grabbing one of Oliver’s discarded shirts from the floor. Since Raisa was on a little vacation to see her sister, a lot of the domestic work hadn’t been done lately. Felicity didn’t mind. She enjoyed some creative chaos. She put on some panties before walking to the door. She looked back over her shoulder only to wink at Oliver before she went downstairs.

Felicity had just reached the middle of the stairs when she realized that the light in the kitchen was switched on. She tiptoed to the kitchen, almost expecting to see Tommy trying to steal some cookies. Instead, William was sitting at the kitchen table, a mug of tea on the table and playing with his phone.

“Hey,” Felicity said gently.

“Oh, hey.” William switched off his phone and looked up.

“What are you doing here?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I couldn’t sleep.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue, wondering if she had been too loud. She really had tried her best to be as quiet as she possibly could. Having sex with a teenager in the house had been weird at the start, but the need for each other had finally made them forget all worries. They tried to be as quiet as possible, and with William’s room at the other end of the hallway, chances were good that he didn’t notice too much.

Shaking her head, Felicity shook the thought off. When she noticed William’s gaze on her short clothing, Felicity quickly pulled down the hem of her shirt a little more.

“Sorry. I would have dressed if I had known you are here. I just wanted to grab a bottle of water.”

“No, it’s fine,” William replied. He quickly emptied his mug of tea. “I was just about to go back to bed anyway. Good night, Felicity.”

“Night, William.”

Felicity took a step back to make room for William as he walked past her to the door. Before he could leave the kitchen, she held him back, though.

“William?”

“Hm?”

“I could pick you up from school tomorrow again if you want to. I have-“

“I’ll rather take the bus but thank you.”

“Oh. Okay.”

With that, William disappeared and left Felicity alone in the kitchen. She frowned slightly, getting an increasingly bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. She knew William was no child anymore. She was a teenager, and Felicity remembered very well that her time as a teenager hadn’t only been sunshine and roses either. Then again, what time in her life had been? Still, she felt like something was wrong with William.

Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge she strolled back upstairs. She wondered what could be going on with him. She was sure that he didn’t take any drugs. Oliver had talked to it about him repeatedly. William knew that drugs were a no-go in this family and for school. He’d lose his place at school if they found out he was taking drugs. Audrey hadn’t been here in a while, so maybe he was a little lovesick. Maybe he regretted moving here, though. Felicity wasn’t sure if she and Oliver were-

“Everything alright?”

Only when she looked up, Felicity found that she was already back in the bedroom. Oliver was lying sprawled out on the bed, his arms crossed behind his head.

“Do you think William is okay?” Felicity asked, closing the door behind her and leaning back against it. “Do you think he feels comfortable here.”

Oliver frowned. “Yes. Why? Don’t you think so?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I thought everything was fine, but he was weird today.”

Oliver’s frown deepened. “Weird?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity just repeated, shrugging her shoulders once more. “He wanted to leave really quickly when I picked him up from school, and he doesn’t want me to pick him up tomorrow.”

“Maybe he just wants to take the bus.”

“I don’t know. I have a weird feeling,” Felicity said. “I think there is something going on.”

“More than a teenager not wanting to be picked up from school because it’s totally uncool?”

“Uncool?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Sure. Mommy coming by and take your hand to make sure you get home safe.”

Felicity frowned. William had asked if she could pick him up today, so it didn’t seem to make sense that he was now rejecting her offer because it was uncool.

“I don’t know.”

“I am going to talk to him tomorrow, okay?” Oliver suggested.

Felicity nodded. “Sounds fair.”

Oliver reached out his hand. “Now, come here.”

With a smile, Felicity approached Oliver and sat down in his lap. While his lips brushed against her jaw, Felicity took some gulps from the water. She put the bottle to her nightstand and framed Oliver’s face with her hands, kissing him gently.

“Let’s just sleep and delay everything else to tomorrow, alright?” she asked.

Oliver nodded. “Alright.”

They snuggled up to one another, Oliver’s arms wrapped around Felicity’s waist safely. Her forehead was resting against his chest.

“I am sure it’s nothing,” Oliver whispered and kissed the top of her head, “but we’ll see.”

Felicity nodded. “We’ll see.”

 

 

With low sigh, Oliver lifted his hand and knocked at William’s door.

“Come in.”

When Oliver opened the door, he saw his oldest son lying on his bed with his phone in his hands. Now that Oliver stepped in, William lifted his head, though.

“Something wrong?” William asked with a frown.

“No, no,” Oliver replied. He shut the door behind him and walked over to the desk. He sat down on the edge casually and sighed. “I was actually wondering if there is something wrong with you.”

Frowning, William switched off his phone and dropped it to the mattress. He sat up, and asked, “Why would you think that?”

“Oh, I don’t really think that,” Oliver replied. “Felicity does, though.”

“And why would Felicity think that?”

If the way William lowered her gaze and seemed to be incredibly busy with trying to smooth some wrinkles out of his blanket was any indication, Oliver had hit a nerve. He puckered his lips for a moment, unsure how to continue.

Eventually, he asked, “Everything alright between you and Audrey?”

“Sure.”

“Did something happen at school?” he continued asking. When William stayed quiet, Oliver asked, “Did someone bug you?”

William looked up, rolling his eyes. “I am sixteen, not six.”

“So?” Oliver asked. “I think there is no such thing about being too old to get into some trouble with your friends, especially since you just got into school and-“

“It’s about Felicity.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “What is with Felicity?”

William sighed. He crossed his legs and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and looked down. Oliver watched him, not saying a word. When he had been relaxed before, he was definitely worried now. So far, things between William and Felicity had always been good. They had gotten along well. They were family as much as he was for both of them.

“When Felicity picked me up from school, she got out of the car to look for me. My friends saw her and… they kind of made fun of her.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. His worry was now starting to be replaced by something close to anger almost. As much as he knew that William and his friends were kids or at least teenagers, and Felicity would definitely be able to defend herself against him, he didn’t like that there was anyone making fun about her in the first place.

“Making fun because… she’s an uncool stepmom?” Oliver asked, trying to think for the possibility that made the most sense. “I mean… like an uncool parent in general like in your age almost all parents are uncool?”

“No,” William replied. “It’s because she is hot.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “What?”

William sighed, looking at his father. “When Felicity arrived, they thought she was someone’s sister or something. She’s young. She’s beautiful. She wears short skirts and-“

“Her skirts are not that short,” Oliver said, briefly remembering when he had said this the last time.

“-she’s now on their top list of the hot moms.”

“They have a list about hot moms?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I am keeping out of it because it’s… gross… but I don’t want Felicity to come to school anymore. I don’t want them to… see her again and… I don’t know…”

Oliver nodded slowly. “What if Felicity stayed in the car when she picks you up?”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know.”

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered. “I am not sure about that either.”

“Will you talk to Felicity about this?” William asked. “I don’t want to talk about this with her. It’s embarrassing.”

Again, Oliver nodded. “Alright. I’ll do that.”

“Thanks.”

“Sure.” Oliver walked to the door before he turned around to William once more. “So, that’s all, or is there something else bothering you?”

“No, that’s all,” William said. “I promise.”

Oliver smiled. “Okay. Then stop thinking about it. Tell your friends you don’t feel comfortable with how they talk about Felicity. If they don’t accept it, either you will have to learn to live with it, or you will have to find new friends.”

William shrugged his shoulders. “I doubt I can live with that, so new friends it is I guess.”

“I am sorry.”

Again, William shrugged his shoulders. “It’s not that bad. I rather want friends who are not acting like that.”

“That’s a really adult decision,” Oliver told him. “I’ll go downstairs now.”

William just nodded, so Oliver opened the door and left the room. While he was working downstairs, he wondered what to think about what his son had told him. That teenagers were now imagining Felicity being naked and doing God knew what with them actually made his stomach twist. Of course there was the possibility that it was a lot more innocent than this. Judging from his own time as a teenager, he doubted it, though.

As soon as he reached the foot of the stairs, Felicity hurried out of the kitchen, looking at him with perked up eyebrows.

“And?”

Oliver sighed, grabbed her hand and pulled her with him into the kitchen. He leaned against the counters, his legs slightly parted. His arms were wrapped around her waist loosely.

“What did he say?” Felicity urged when Oliver didn’t say anything.

Oliver sighed once more. “William wasn’t too happy with his friends’ reaction to you.”

“Oh, no,” Felicity said. “I should have probably waited in the car. Did they think it was very uncool that his stepmom picked him up and-“

“That was not the problem.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “So, what was?”

“Honestly?”

“No, I love when you lie to me,” Felicity replied, rolling her eyes before gently slapping his chest. “Of course, honestly.”

“Well, his friends think you are hot.”

“I am hot.”

“Yeah, but that is not something a teenager wants his friends to say about his stepmother.”

“Why? I am hot.”

“Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“Teenagers are possibly masturbating to your photo.”

Felicity screwed up her nose. “There is no fun about it when you say it like that.”

“Because there is no fun about it.”

Felicity pecked his lips. “At least not for you because you are the uncool dad and I am the hot stepmom now. Poor you.”

“Who says I am not the hot dad?” Oliver asked. “If the girls see me.”

“Oh, honey.” Felicity stroked her fingers through his stubble. “You are turning forty next year. The times for teenagers to think you are hot are long over. Sorry to disappoint you.”

Oliver grinned, his hands lowering from Felicity’s waist to her butt as he pulled her closer. “You know who I really want to think I am hot?”

“Oh, I got an idea,” Felicity replied. She smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him gently. “Reminds me that you still owe me something from last night.”

“I haven’t forgotten,” Oliver told her. “As soon as the kids are asleep, I am going to show you how hot I am.”

“Can’t wait.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, this was written before the last episode of Arrow aired. ;)


	283. Part of a family

“I know I am late. I also know I loaded four of my five kids onto you for the past thirty minutes which probably isn’t the nicest thing to do to a birthday boy, but at least they spent you company. Anyway, I brought cake, chocolate cream cake to be exact because Oliver mentioned it was your favorite. I hope that’s enough of an apology. Besides, I am still earlier than my beloved husband who is supposed to be your best friend, so I am sure I deserve additional points.”

“I wasn’t lending points, but okay,” Tommy said with a chuckle. He took the platter of cake from her, allowing Felicity to adjust Addie’s position on her hip. “Did you bake this yourself?”

Felicity cocked her head. “I guess Oliver warned you?”

“He might have,” Tommy replied with a grin. “To his and to my defense, the last time I threw a birthday party we were worried Laurel would poison us with her cooking, though.”

“That might excuse you, but it certainly doesn’t excuse Oliver,” Felicity replied. She sighed dramatically before she looked at Addie. “Someone’s gonna get punished for it.”

“Please,” Tommy said over Addie’s amused giggles, “if you say it like that it sounds like you want to spank him which is not something I want to consider my friend doing, neither at the receiving nor the other end. Really, Felicity. Ugh.”

Felicity chuckled. She and Tommy hadn’t known each other for long. It had only been a couple of months since Tommy had returned to the life of the living after all, and he certainly was still trying to work his way into this new reality of his life. Coming from ten years of being mind-controlled by his father and being trained into becoming his assassin, living in the suburbs of Starling City right next to his best friend who suddenly has five kids and ran for mayor had to be a big deal. Yet, they had already formed a real bond of friendship.

“Now, let’s put the cake away, so I can-“

Felicity gestured between them for a moment. Tommy looked almost a little hesitant, but he did put the cake onto the small table next to him. He smiled a little shily as he turned back to Felicity, staying unmoving and letting her dictate what to do now.

“Come here, Birthday Boy,” she said cheerfully and wrapped her free arm around Tommy’s shoulders as she straightened up onto the tip of her toes, pulling him into a tight hug. “Happy Birthday.”

“Thank you, Felicity,” Tommy replied softly, his voice full of emotions. He hugged her back, wrapping his arms around her waist gently as if he was scared he could break her or Addie, who leaned into the hug naturally. “I almost feel like it should be called a rebirthday.”

Felicity smiled as she stepped out of the hug. “You did manage to be reborn, so you are right. Celebrating your first birthday after… everything… It’s a big thing. It is a rebirthday.”

“I guess it had to be unreal for Oliver too after he came back from the island.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “It took a long time until he celebrated his birthday again. In his first year back, you died. After that, he often felt too guilty to celebrate.”

“My death wasn’t his fault.”

“But he couldn’t save you,” Felicity replied gently. “He often took the kids to your grave, especially on his birthday. He only really willingly celebrated his birthday when the kids were old enough to understand the concept. Emmy couldn’t understand why her daddy wouldn’t want to celebrate, so he started celebrating, at least in the small circle of family and closest friends.”

“I think a party is still too much for me,” Tommy replied, massaging the back of his neck uncomfortably. He shrugged his shoulders. “Still feels unreal to be here with you and your kids after everything.”

His eyes were focused on Addie. She smiled at him friendlily, resting her head against Felicity’s shoulder and playing with her ponytail. Her big blue eyes were focused at him, though.

“Do you want to hold her?” Felicity asked.

“Oh, I don’t know if-“

“She just napped and got some yummy fruit puree, so she’s really content right now,” Felicity said. “Really, she’s easy once she is completely content. It’s making sure she is content which is the real struggle.”

“Yeah, I heart Addie was one of the more exhausting babies.”

“Well, all of our kids were exhausting. Millie is the big exception. Emmy was exhausting and turned into feisty little girl. Tommy was exhausting as a baby and turned into a slightly picky boy, especially when it comes to people. Millie was a blessing. She’s been the best. Addie… well, I am excited to see what she grows into.”

“Sounds like she is a challenge.”

“She is,” Felicity replied and bobbed Addie up and down on her hip playfully until she giggled. “And such a sweet one.”

Tommy still hesitated to take her. He was getting used to spending time with the kids. He had formed kind of a bond with Tommy – Felicity’s Baby Tommy – which, given that Tommy was a real mama boy and very picky about people he liked, was amazing. For some reason, probably the fact that they were both really quiet, Tommy had bonded with his new uncle much more quickly than he had bonded with most of the other family members.

As if Addie knew that she was talked about, she lifted her head from Felicity’s shoulder and reached out her hands for Tommy. Felicity smiled and pushed her hip a little closer to Tommy, bringing Addie closer towards him in conclusion.

“You wanna go to Uncle Tommy?”

Since Addie continued to reach out for him, Tommy seemed to take all his courage together and carefully lifted Addie from Felicity’s arms. He the baby against his chest, looking right into her eyes. For a long moment, nothing happened. Several seconds passed before Addie smiled happily and rested her head against Tommy’s shoulder.

“She likes you,” Felicity said with a smile, feeling her heart warming at the sight.

“She’s… tiny.”

Felicity chuckled. “You’ve been there after Robbie was born. You should be used to how small babies are. Addie is a giant compared to a newborn already.”

“I doubt I will ever get used to this.”

“I felt the same way when I was holding Emmy for the first time. Well, Tommy and Millie taught me better about what a small baby really looks like,” Felicity said. She looked past Tommy into the living room. “Should we go inside before my kids destroy your house or at least mess up your entire living room?”

“Yes, of course. Do you-“

“I’ll take the cake,” Felicity said, quickly grabbing the platter before Tommy could give Addie back to her.

When Felicity had realized that Tommy’s birthday was coming close, she had asked Oliver what they wanted to do about it. She had doubted that Tommy was in for a big party, but she wouldn’t have let him sit alone in his home on his birthday. Hence, she had decided to invite herself as well as her family over for some cake. She had asked if he wanted anyone else there – Laurel mainly – but Tommy had refused. Thea, Roy and Robbie would come later today. They had baby swimming class.

In the living room, William, Emmy, Tommy and Millie were already sitting around the couch table. When Felicity and Tommy with Addie entered the room, they looked up.

“Is that chocolate cream cake?” Emmy asked.

“Where’s dad?” William asked at the same time.

Felicity put the platter with cake on the couch table and kneeled down next to Millie, who immediately climbed into her mother’s lap.

“It is chocolate cream cake-“

“Did you make it?” Emmy and William asked in chorus.

Felicity puckered her lips. “Traitors. Both of you.”

“I will get plates and forks from the kitchen,” William offered.

“I help you,” Tommy replied.

While William and his younger brother went to the kitchen, Tommy sat down on the couch with Addie in his lap. The baby leaned forward, trying to grab the cake, but Felicity pulled the platter out of her daughter’s reach quickly.

“Where is Oliver by the way?” Tommy asked, frowning at Felicity.

“At his campaign office, but he should be here any minute.”

“Any problems?” Tommy asked.

Felicity rolled her eyes and sighed. “Don’t ask. It seems like there is always a problem. I cannot wait for the campaign to be over.”

“Oliver’s going to be mayor then.”

“I hope so, yes,” Felicity replied with a smile. “He’s gonna be a good one.”

Tommy nodded. “I am sure he will.”

Felicity smiled. Not a single person who knew Oliver would think he wouldn’t make a good mayor. He cared for people in the city. He was willing to make sacrifices and take risks for them. He was a great guy with so much energy and so much heart, he just had to make a good mayor.

“So, I know how Christmas looks for you guys,” Tommy said. “What are birthdays like?”

“Usually like Christmas with a lot more cake.”

Tommy chuckled. “So you always throw a party?”

“For the kids,” Felicity said with a nod of her head. “For Oliver’s and my birthday, we usually prefer something quieter. We all have breakfast together, and just enjoy the day as a family.”

“Sounds nice.”

“It is.” Felicity chuckled. “Before this baby boom, when there was just Sara Diggle and Emmy, we actually celebrated her half-birthday.”

“Her half-birthday?”

“Yes, when she turned one and a half, Lyla, Thea, Laurel and I met, drank champagne and ate cake. Sara kicked Oliver out of our home then.”

“Poor Oliver.”

Felicity grinned. “We had little to no sympathy. Oliver and John met in a bar for some drinks then.”

Tommy lowered his gaze. Though he was smiling, Felicity didn’t miss that he seemed sad. She knew that his childhood hadn’t been full of good memories. With his mother’s death, he had also lost his father. His only positive memories of childhood since then had been the hours spent with the Queen, an at least for a child intact appearing family that had always treated them as one of their own.

“You know, you have Thea and her family as well as Oliver and me and our family,” Felicity told him. “All our traditions can be your traditions, too. We love a growing family.”

“Mommy and daddy can also have another baby, so you can be godfather.”

Felicity patted Emmy’s head gently. “Let’s not go this far, Emmy.”

Tommy chuckled, looking at Emmy. “You want another sibling?”

Emmy shrugged her shoulders. “I like babies.”

“I wouldn’t have noticed,” Tommy replied with a chuckle.

Once William and Tommy came back from the kitchen, Felicity cut the cake and gave each of them a little slice. Millie’s was so tiny that the toddler complained, but Felicity felt the slice was enough for the young girl. Of course, Emmy spoke up for Addie, who didn’t get her own piece of the cake, but her excitement over her own piece outweighed the sisterly solidarity quickly. She started munching the sweet pastry just like her siblings. Tommy – as in Uncle Tommy – fed Addie a fork of the cake when he thought Felicity didn’t look, but she ignored it. It was sweet that he was trying to do Addie some good.

“I could get used to these kinds of birthdays… or rebirthdays,” Tommy said.

Felicity smiled. “Well, I already marked all the important birthday dates in your calendar. Emmy’s birthday is the next-“

“Only two weeks!”

“And then we have the busy week in March with Connor’s, Addie’s and Millie’s birthdays as well as Oliver’s and mine anniversary.”

“Busy week sounds like an underestimation.”

Felicity chuckled. “That might be true.”

When the doorbell was ringing, Emmy immediately jumped up. “That’s daddy!”

While she was running to the door, Felicity looked at Tommy and grinned. “Wanna know what it looks like when one part of the family – a terribly arrogant part – is given a thick ear by another part of the family – the part who always tried her best and might have just made a few mistakes while baking?”

Tommy chuckled. “I can’t wait.”


	284. Exploring limits

Addie grinned mischievously while she was holding her hand over the tower stack Felicity had built. She waited until she was sure that she had her mother’s full attention before she knocked the tower down. The bricks flew through the living room. Addie squealed excitedly in response, while Felicity gasped for breath with pretended shock.

“Oh, oh,” she said, looking at her daughter. “Now, wait until I get you.”

With a swiftness that actually surprised Felicity a little, Addie turned around and crawled away from her, giggling in amusement. With a chuckle, Felicity followed her daughters on all four. She chased Addie for a few minutes, always staying a little behind her. Addie continued giggling and squealing, crawling around the furniture and trying to hide behind it.

Eventually, Felicity just reached out her hand and grabbed Addie’s foot, though. She quickly pulled her daughter towards her then and started peppering her tummy, neck and face with dozens of little kisses. Addie’s squeals got even louder, and she kicked her feet like she always did when she was really excited. It was the sweetest thing ever.

When Addie’s squealing started to make it sound like she was swallowing air, Felicity pulled her baby to her chest and turned onto her back. Addie didn’t seem to be in the quiet mood to cuddle, though. As soon as Felicity came to rest, Addie tried to roll off her, so she could get away from her as quickly as possible. Felicity put her hands to Addie’s waist and started to lift her up. Addie squealed.

“That’s better, right?” she asked. “You like the airplane game, huh? You can see the entire room like that. It’s like you are flying, just like Supergirl.”

While Felicity was watching her baby’s happy smile, she realized how much she missed spending quality time with her kids. She did spend a lot of time with them, of course she did. Yet, it never felt like it was enough. Lazy Saturday mornings were the best there was.

After a while, Felicity noticed that she and Addie weren’t alone any longer. She turned her head to find William standing in the frame of the door. Felicity smiled and sat up, pulling Addie into her lap.

“Hey,” she said. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah,” William said. “I actually just wanted to ask if you and dad had any plans for Valentine’s Day.”

“Well, it’s Emmy’s birthday,” Felicity replied and shrugged her shoulders, “so I’d say we invite everyone over for a traditional birthday party.”

William frowned. “So, you and don’t want to celebrate?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders once more. “No. We usually don’t.”

“Why don’t you go out tonight?”

“Your dad is going to Central City tonight for this-“

“I know,” William interrupted her. “You could go out for dinner together before his flight. You can drive him to the airport.”

“And who’s watching the kids? Raisa is still taken care of her sister and-“

“I’ll do that,” William said matter-of-factly. “I’ll take care of them.”

Felicity puckered her lips and cocked her head at him. She got the suspicion that maybe William was trying to get rid of her. William seemed to sense that she wasn’t buying his innocent offer because he pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and hunched his shoulders. That way, he looked exactly like Oliver when he had done something wrong.

“Audrey wants to come over.”

Felicity grinned. Wasn’t a first love beautiful?

“I guess I will go upstairs and pick out a dress then.”

William smiled. “Thank you, Felicity.”

 

 

“So, will you go home immediately now?” Oliver asked Felicity, lacing his fingers through hers. He pecked her lips. “Or will you give William and Audrey some more time?”

Felicity chuckled. “I think I will give them some more time. Maybe I will invite myself over to Tommy’s and spent an hour there.”

Oliver hummed. “My wife and my oldest friend spending an evening together. What do I think of that?”

“You love it.” Felicity chuckled once more, straightened up onto the tip of her toes and framed his face with her hands. She kissed him gently before she released a long sigh. “You have to go now.”

Oliver nodded. “It’s just two days.”

“I hate both of them,” Felicity replied and pecked his lips once more. “Now go.”

Oliver nodded. He lifted his suitcase from the floor and kissed her three times more before he finally let go with a groan.

“I’ll go now, or I will never go.”

Felicity chuckled and waved goodbye. She watched Oliver leave, pushing her bottom lip forward in a little pout. When Oliver turned his head back over his shoulder one last time, he winked at her.

Once Oliver was out of sight, Felicity turned around and slowly headed to the exit. It had been a nice evening with Oliver, and she was glad that William had offered to take care of his siblings, so they could do it. With everything going on, Felicity couldn’t deny that there hadn’t been much time for her and Oliver together either. This evening had been exactly what they had needed. She should think about how to thank William for that and-

Felicity had just stepped out of the building when the ringing of her phone pulled her from her thoughts. She quickly reached into her purse and pulled out her phone. A photo of Tommy Merlyn was blinking on her display.

“Hey,” she said as she took the phone. “I just wanted to call you and ask if I could come over for a drink or two. William is having his girlfriend over, and I want to give them a little more time and-“

“Yeah, that is why I am calling,” Tommy said. “I don’t know. I mean, of course it’s possible that William is just following in his father’s footsteps and has a lot of girlfriends. Since I actually doubt that, I think there might be a giant party going on in your house.”

Felicity’s hand tightened around her phone. “What?”

“I thought you might want to know.”

“I do,” Felicity said. “Thank you, Tommy.”

As soon as Felicity had hung up, she hurried to her car and directed it through the city back to her home. The drive took almost fifteen minutes, fifteen minutes that Felicity’s anger started building and increasing. By the time she arrived at home where she saw a small group of people was drinking beer and laughing and where could hear the loud music even from her car, she was in rage.

Completely ignoring the guys outside the house, Felicity walked right in and into the living room. The sight of all the at least fifty partying people downstairs and the mess that had been done here did nothing to calm her anger down. If anything, it just increased it. The only slightly calming thing was that it seemed like the party was limited to the rooms on the ground floor which meant that the youngers kids must be getting their rest because they were nowhere to be seen here. As soon as Felicity turned off the music, a loud groan echoed through the entire home. Felicity just waited, though.

“Hey, who turned down the music? If someone broke the stereo equipment, my stepmom is gonna kill me and-“

William stepped into the living room, a slightly annoyed expression on his face. As soon as he saw Felicity, he fell silent, though. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants and hunched his shoulders. His eyes lowered, staring at his feet.

“I think it’s time to send your friends home,” Felicity said calmly, but with emphasis. “Now.”

William lifted his gaze, and his eyes were full of regret as he nodded. Felicity watched William while he was ending the party. His friends – well, Felicity doubted that they were all his friends since there were a lot of people and some of them seemed to be a little older than William – didn’t seem to be too fond of the idea of leaving. Only when William insisted, they got up.

As the living room got emptier, Felicity got to see the whole extent of the damage that had been done by the party. Empty paper mugs were placed everywhere, some of them discarded on the floors. There were plenty bottles of alcohol. The floor looked sticky and dirty. Fluids – probably beer and sweet soft drinks – had mixed with street filth and trash. Even food that had already been bitten into was lying around. The stench of cigarettes and alcohol was in the air.

When Felicity heard the front door behind shut, Felicity took in a deep breath. She was angry, really angry even. There were at least a dozen reasons why she was angry, and she felt she really had every reason to be. Yet, she knew that she had to at least party calm down to even be able to talk to William. He returned to the living room a moment later, the guilt written all over his face.

“Felicity, I-“

Felicity shook her head, lifting a hand. She couldn’t even look at William. Yet, he fell silent.

“Where are your siblings?” Felicity asked, finally able to look at William.

“Upstairs,” he replied. “I checked for them every hour. They are all asleep. Addie and Millie have been in bed before the party started and haven’t woken up since. Emmy and Tommy were still awake, but I switched on a movie for them on my laptop. They both fell asleep before it got louder and didn’t wake up. I carried them to their beds.”

Felicity nodded. At least William had still taken care of his siblings, at least more than she had expected he would with the party going on.

“Did you drink alcohol?”

William shook his head quickly. “No. I told everyone not to bring alcohol. Josh’s older brother came over with some friends, though. They left some time ago, but they brought a lot of the alcohol.”

Again, Felicity nodded. She looked around the living room. Seeing how messed up her house was disappointed her a lot. This was her home, the very same place where she had played with her baby daughter right this morning to be exact.

“You will clean this up,” Felicity told William, her voice still calm. “Either tonight or early tomorrow morning, our home will look like our home again.”

William nodded quickly. “I will start immediately. Felicity, I am so-“

Felicity shook her head. “No, not now. I am still too angry. It’s one thing to test your limits. You are a teenager, and you want to see how far you can go. I understand that. While it’s not right I know it’s only natural. What really is not natural is that you lied to me this morning with the very purpose to have this party. What’s even worse is that you are doing this in a night when your father is not home because I guess this night was chosen for that very reason. You would have never done this with your father around, at least not like this.”

William lowered his gaze which told Felicity that she had been right about that. Oliver not being home was indeed a reason why he had chosen to do this party tonight and no other night. Felicity couldn’t deny feeling disrespected. She had never felt like being William’s stepmother meant that she experienced any less respect than Oliver or Samantha. Right now, she did feel that way, though.

“I want you to think about how you plan on making this alright again, not necessarily to me or your father, but definitely to your siblings. The fact that you threw this party, while everyone could have gone upstairs where your siblings that you promised me to take good care of are sleeping is not okay, especially because you were the one who offered taking care of them. I want you to decide on your own what’s the right way to make up for that. You are old enough,” Felicity said. “I will go upstairs and check on your siblings now. Goodnight, William.”

“Goodnight, Felicity.”

Without another word, Felicity walked past him towards the stairs. She had just reached the foot of it when there was a quiet knock. Felicity sighed, tempted to ignore it, but she figured it was better to check who it was. She didn’t want to risk that a partier had forgotten his jacket and would be too loud and eventually wake up the kids was too dangerous.

“Tommy,” Felicity said when she opened the door.

“Hey. I saw everyone left and just wanted to check if you needed help cleaning up or anything.”

Felicity shook her head. “Thanks, but William will do that. He created this mess, so he’s the one who will clean it up.”

Tommy nodded. “Okay. I’ll go back home. Tell me if you need my help.”

“Thanks. Also, thanks for calling,” Felicity replied.

Again, Tommy nodded. “Sure.”

→ → → → → 

Oliver had just switched of the flight mode when his phone already rang. He grinned amusedly when he saw it was Tommy and took the call.

“If Felicity fell asleep, just leave her where she is. William can certainly take care of the kids for the night and-“

“I don’t want to alarm you, but I think you should come home,” Tommy said.

Oliver frowned. “Did something happen?”

“No,” Tommy hurried to say. “No, everything’s alright at home. At least nobody is hurt or sick. It’s just that I think Felicity and William got into a little… fight… because he threw a party tonight.”

“I am sure Felicity can handle it,” Oliver with firmly and from deep conviction, “but I am coming home.”

“Alright,” Tommy said. “See you soon.”

“Thanks for calling.”

“Yeah… I just remember how our parties ended sometimes, so it felt safer to call you instead of letting William make the same mistakes we did.”

Oliver nodded. “Yes. I guess you are right. I really appreciate it. Thank you.”

“I guess it’s the not-so-fun part about being an adult in a family, right?”

Oliver chuckled. “Right. I gotta hang up and check when I can come home now.”

“Good. See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow.”

 

 

When Oliver entered his house early the next morning, the entrance area as well as the parts of the kitchen and living room he could see from the door were tidied up. If the smell, the sticky floor and the bin bags of trash were any indication, it had taken a lot of work for that to be done, though. He guessed someone had spent the last hours making sure the house got back into the state it should be in.

Oliver was just about to check where William was when he came from the living room, carrying another full bin bag in each of his hands. As soon as he saw his father, he stopped and sucked in a deep breath.

“Did Felicity call you?”

“No, Felicity can handle this alone. She doesn’t need my help with that. Tommy called,” Oliver replied. He looked around briefly. “You were partying?”

“Felicity already told me what she thinks about it, and I doubt there is much that you can say that will make me feel any worse since I am already feeling like crap,” William said. He put the two bin bags to the others and sighed, looking terribly defeated. “You can try, though. I’d deserve it.”

“I think the fact that you see that proves that I don’t need to say anything else.”

William looked at Oliver for a long moment before he lowered his eyes once more and nodded. Oliver almost felt a little bit sorry for him. He knew from his own youth what it felt like to get caught messing up. Admittedly, it hadn’t ended badly often. His mother had protected him a lot of times, keeping his mistakes a secret from his father who would have been a lot stricter. Looking back, Oliver had wished that his mother had taken more time educating him instead of covering him.

“Did Felicity decide which consequences expect you?” Oliver asked.

“She told me to think about how I can make this up for Emmy, Tommy, Millie and Addie,” William said. “I am thinking about it.”

“Good,” Oliver replied, nodding his head. “Then there is nothing else to say, I guess?”

William shook his head. “No.”

Again, Oliver nodded. “Is Felicity upstairs?”

“Yes, she went upstairs when I started tidying up here,” William replied. “She’s angry, a worrying level of angry. She was so… calm. No loud voice or anything.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He knew that was the worst kind of anger when it came to Felicity. When she talked with her loud voice, it was serious. If she was all calm, it was worse.

“She has every right to be angry.”

“I know.”

“You know, the worst about all of this is that, if you had asked Felicity, she would have been the last to turn down your wish to throw a party. That is what I find is the saddest part about this.”

William nodded, lowering his eyes. “I am going to apologize to her as soon as she’s ready to hear it.”

“That sounds right,” Oliver told him. He cleared his throat. “You do know that this night doesn’t change anything, right? You’re still a part of this family. We still love you. You are still welcome to live here if you still want that.”

William sucked in a deep breath, revealing that he had indeed thought about the further consequences of this party. In Oliver’s eyes, this was the first big misstep William had made. While Oliver wanted his son to experience consequences and own up to his mistakes, he didn’t want him to believe that it would change that they were all a family. Especially with William’s quite difficult position within the Queen Family – having joint the family late and being the only stepchild – Oliver was sure that William could need the reassurance. As uncomplicatedly and easily this difficult position seemed to be inexistent most of the times, in situations like these Oliver was sure it would still be brought up every once in a while.

“Thank you, Dad.”

“Not for that.” Oliver nodded towards the stairs. “I’m upstairs.”

William nodded.

Oliver had already taken a few steps before he turned around to look at William. “Was Audrey here, too?”

William shook his head. “She said she didn’t want to be part of the lie and everything. In her eyes, you and Felicity are much cooler than her parents, so she felt it was a terrible idea to lie and do this behind your backs.”

“Since you are my son which means we share the same DNA, I feel obligated to tell you that if your girlfriend objects, most of the time it’s because she’s right.”

“Only most of the time?”

Oliver grinned. “In Felicity’s case, all the time.”

With that, Oliver headed upstairs. He shot brief looks into the kids’ rooms. They were all fast asleep. Either they hadn’t noticed much of what had happened tonight which wouldn’t surprise Oliver because his kids had quite the deep sleep, or they had passed out from exhaustion.

When he entered his bedroom, his eyes immediately found Felicity standing at the window. She had kicked off her high heels, but she was still wearing the black dress she had worn for their dinner last night. Her eyes were directed outside.

“Did Tommy call you?”

Oliver smiled softly. Of course Felicity didn’t need to turn around to know it was him. He took off his jacket, threw it to the bed and stepped behind Felicity. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. His fingertips explored the exposed skin of her waist where a cutout was going right around her body and only golden little… things… were keeping the two parts of the dress together. Oliver lowered his lips to the side of her neck and kissed her pulse point gently.

“Yes,” Oliver replied. “I know you can handle this alone, but-“

“I am glad that you are here,” Felicity said. With a sigh, she leaned back against Oliver and rested her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes. “How does it look downstairs?”

“Better I guess, but still not perfect.”

Felicity frowned slightly, her eyes not opening yet. “Do you think I was too hard on him?”

“I don’t think so.” Oliver shook his head and kissed her pulse point once more. “I just made sure he knew that it wouldn’t change anything. I mean he’s still living here and welcomed to live here and-“

At that, Felicity turned around quickly, looking at him with worry. “Did William think we would kick him out?”

“No, I don’t think it was like that. I think he was just worried about long-term consequences and-“

“So I was too hard on him?”

“No,” Oliver replied firmly. He shook his head and put his hands to her shoulders. “This was not about you. This was about him and his… not so easy position in this family.”

“You mean because I am not his mother.”

Oliver hesitated. “You are his mother, even if he doesn’t call you mom or anything. It’s just that-“

“-since, unlike his siblings, he isn’t my child, it’s still different. I am kind of obligated by nature to love my kids, not necessarily your kids.”

Oliver screwed up his nose. “That is not what I meant because that sounds terrible and-“

Felicity put her hand to his cheek and smile. “I know what you mean.”

Oliver looked at Felicity intently for a moment. Only when he was sure that she knew that he really didn’t want to imply that that was true, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. He knew Felicity from the bottom of his heart. He would never doubt that she loved William just like she loved all her children, no matter what movies or books would imply about the relationship between stepparent and stepchild.

“Are you tired?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded. “Very.”

“So come on. We lie down and sleep for a while.”

 

 

After only two hours of sleep and a quick shower, Felicity was feeling a lot better. She would lie if she said the nasty feeling in her stomach had completely gone away, but she was ready to go downstairs and face William again.

She had just reached the middle of the stairs when she saw him coming in. He closed the door behind him and leaned back against the door with a sigh of exhaustion. If he had really spent the entire night tidying everything up – and that was what it looked like depending on what Felicity could see from the stairs – she easily believed that he was exhausted.

“You should go to bed,” Felicity said softly when she reached the foot of the stairs.

William opened his eyes and quickly straightened up. He moved his hands over his face to rub away the tiredness.

“Felicity, I want to apologize,” William said. He made a short pause, giving her time to stop him. Only when she didn’t say anything, he continued, “I am really, really sorry. I shouldn’t have lied to you, and I shouldn’t have pulled Emmy, Tommy, Millie and Addie into all of this. It was a mistake.”

Felicity nodded. “Thank you.”

“I also thought about my punishment,” William added and pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants. “I think to make up for this, it is a good idea if I spent a day with my siblings. Just the four of them and I. They get to decide what we do. I will do it with them and pay for it. We will do this in summer in the week when I was actually planning on going to that camp I told you about. I will not go there this year.”

“That’s a little bit hard.”

“It’s not,” William replied. “It’s appropriate. It’s what I want to do if that is okay with you.”

Felicity thought about it for a moment before she nodded. “Okay.”

There was a moment of silence before William asked, “So, we are okay?”

“Of course we are.” Felicity smiled and nodded to the kitchen. “I want to make breakfast. Do you want to help me?”

William smiled, nodding his head. “Yes, sure.”


	285. Inherited horror

“Alex said the newest predictions for the election results look good,” Thea said, smiling at her brother, who was holding his tiny godson in his arms safely. “Your results continue to get better by each week.”

“It’s not that hard,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “I have no concurrence.”

“Still,” Thea replied. “More and more people seem to actually trust you with leading this city. You might even get the best voter turnout in quite some time even though you are the only candidate. Your emphasis of the importance to vote actually reached a lot of people. You are doing great with the charity projects you support and the values you stand for. I guess you don’t need me to help you with the campaign. You are doing very good on your own.”

Oliver lifted his gaze from Robbie, who was sleeping soundly in his arms. He looked at his sister with a smile and cocked his head. Thea was smiling, her eyes focused on her little baby boy, but there was a little bit of sadness in her eyes. Oliver knew how much she had loved working here. She had loved working at Verdant, but she had loved it here even more. It was almost like she had found a purpose for her in life, something to do for the rest of her real life, away from the Speedy persona. Besides, it had connected her to their mother, just like it connected Oliver to their mother. Moira had engaged in a mayoral race too after all. Anyway, There was no doubt that Thea loved Robbie with all her heart, and she loved being a mother. Still, he was sure she missed her work at the campaign office.

“I will always need you,” Oliver told her gently, “and you know you can come back whenever you want. There is always a place for you here.”

“Until June,” Thea replied with a chuckle, “when my big brother is being voted mayor and moving into City Hall.”

“Even then I will find a job for you.”

Thea perked up her eyebrows. “Oh really? What position do you see me in?”

“I don’t know. What would you like?” Oliver asked with a chuckle. “I know much better than to make someone my assistant just to spend more time with them. Felicity taught me that, and she actually screw the promise that she got to choose my assistant out for me. So, you could be my deputy mayor.”

Thea chuckled. “I think you’d get called out for nepotism in a heartbeat. It would probably ruin your good numbers right now. Besides, I doubt I can manage keeping this little guy satisfied and running the city without stealing Raisa from you.”

“I will kill you if you try,” Oliver replied. “Raisa is mine. We can talk about sharing when you add four kids to Robbie.”

“I think I’ll pass. I still have trouble with this one.”

There was something in her eyes that made Oliver cock his head. “Something wrong?”

“No,” Thea replied a little too quickly, massaging the back of her neck. “It’s just… is it normal to constantly be worried? Worried that I am doing something wrong, or that something could happen to Robbie? You always seem so relaxed with the kids and… I don’t know.”

Oliver smiled. “It gets better with experience, but I doubt that people who experienced what we experienced will ever be fully relaxed. I am scare about the kids all the time. I am scared when Emmy goes to school that someone abducts her. I am worried they run in front of a car. I am scared of a lot of things. I guess it’s the same for a lot of parents, but maybe a little more intense for us. We just can’t project it onto the kids. We need to teach them about dangers, but we can’t lock them into their rooms until they are adult and fully capable to protect themselves. It’s not easy, but… we cannot allow our fears to affect our kids.”

Thea nodded slowly. “Sounds like a good advice.”

Oliver smiled. “I hope so. So, take the time you need to get used to being a mother. Spend as much time with Robbie and the kids that might follow until you can trust the world not to swallow him whole. Then we can still find a way for you to come back here.”

“Well, Roy can take the shifts during the day, while I can take the nightshifts. We won’t have much time together, but it’s better than trusting a stranger with Robbie.” Thea frowned, puckering her lips, though. “Now, did you actually think about who you want to make deputy mayor?”

Oliver sighed. “I did think about, but I didn’t get to any conclusion.”

Thea puckered her lips. “Not even a wild wish?”

“If I could express a wild wish, it was Felicity.”

Oliver chuckled, but it mixed with a sigh at the same time. Of course, Felicity was nothing but a wild wish for that position. The reason he would love to have her be the deputy mayor was that he would love to have her input on things. He knew she’d be doing great in that job because she loved this city as much as Oliver did. Yet, he knew she wouldn’t enjoy it, and Oliver would never ask her to give away the job at Queen Inc., especially given how great she was as it. She was doing the good she was best at, while Oliver would do what he knew he would do best. Besides, Oliver knew that he had her input and her support anyway. Unlike him, who didn’t understand much about computers or tech in general, Felicity could actually help him with his job, and she did it with a naturalness that would never cease to impress him.

It did mean that he had to think thoroughly about who to give the position of deputy mayor to. He had tried to think about it for some time already, but he just hadn’t gotten to any good conclusion. He had two strong candidates, who would be great at the job, but Oliver hadn’t decided who he should take and if he should ask at all. It was quite the intense job after all. He would have to put more thought into it in the next weeks and months.

“You know, if you have any idea, I am open to it.”

Thea smiled. “I don’t have any idea yet, but I have a lot of time to think about it if Robbie gives me some rest.”

Oliver looked at his godson with an amused smile. “Was that a little bit of complaint there?”

“Maybe a little.” Thea chuckled. “He makes it relatively easy.”

Oliver smiled. He was happy that Thea had taken the time to visit him. He knew how hard the first time with a baby was, especially with the first. There were so many things to adapt to that everything else had to stand back at first. You entire life started revolving around that little human being, who just turned up every routine. It took a lot of work to actually make it work. Having his sister here now, he certainly wouldn’t let her go anytime soon.

“Did Roy and Tommy find a place to build their new club yet?”

“No.” Thea sighed. “I think they are getting headaches trying to find one and-“

When Oliver’s phone rang, Thea stopped.

“Sorry,” Oliver hurried to say and grabbed his phone. When he saw Felicity’s face smiling at him from the display, a smile spread on Oliver’s lips. He took the call without hesitation. “Hey, Honey. How did the-“

A sob came from the other end of the line, making Oliver fall silent. To say he was alarmed immediately was a huge understatement. Panic spread into every cell of his body. Every single one of his muscles tensed. His heart skipped a beat, taking away his breath. Only a second later, his heart started racing, though. It beat against his ribs with so much force, Oliver almost felt like he was having a heart attack. The pain radiated from his chest through his arm, paralyzing him. The never-ending fear he and Thea had talked about a couple of minutes before came back all of a sudden. It felt like a punch into Oliver’s stomach.

A dozen different scenarios, once more terrible than the other, shot through Oliver’s mind, followed by a thousand of questions. He something had happened to the kids. Had one of them gotten severely hurt while playing? Had one of them been taken? Had one of them gotten hurt by a criminal? Who was it? What did the know? What were the next steps? What-

“Oliver?”

Felicity’s heartbreaking sob made Oliver snap out of his thoughts. His fingers tightened around his phone, but he did his best to keep his breathing and his voice calm. He couldn’t help if he completely freaked out.

“Felicity, what happened?”

“I- it’s- I’m- You need-“

“Okay,” Oliver said calmly though he was still in panic.

If Felicity couldn’t even speak, he knew it was worse than bad. She had seen a lot in her life. They had both seen a lot in their lives, especially with their children. Emmy had almost been cut out of Felicity’s womb by crazy Cupid. Tommy had almost died before entering this world after Felicity had fallen down the stairs. Millie had been born in a stuck elevator that could have crashed at any time which might be a little bit of an exaggeration but had been an actual possibility after all. Addie had been so tiny, there had been a real chance that she wouldn’t make it. Then there were a thousand threats out there in the world – viruses, infections, illnesses of every kind really, traffic, playgrounds with dangerous climbing contraptions and other things, criminals, psychopaths who felt like they still had a score to settle with him like it was the case with Malcom Merlyn. The list was endless.

He didn’t want to imagine what had happened this time. He could only hope that his imagination, filled with fears he had brought to Starling from his five years of hell away, was worse than whatever life wanted to throw at them here.

“Okay, Honey,” Oliver said. “Just tell me where you are. Tell me where you are, and I am coming there right now.”

Felicity seemed to be struggling to breathe normally. A brief moment of silence passed before she literally gasped for breath and pressed out the single word, “Hospital.”

“I’ll be there in five minutes.”

Oliver hung up before anything else could be said. He knew Felicity wouldn’t be able to say anything else, and Oliver could only really comfort her if he was with her. He’d be there the fastest if he just ran the few miles to the hospital instead of taking the car or trying to talk to Felicity without being able to offer her any help.

“What happened?” Thea asked when Oliver just threw the phone to his desk and put Robbie back into her arms. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know, but I gotta go. Felicity’s at the hospital.”

Oliver was already halfway out of his office when Thea called after him, “Don’t worry! I’ll take care of everything here!”

As grateful as he was about his sister’s commitment, he couldn’t get himself to care right now. The only thing he was interested in, and the only thing he wanted to know was what happened to Felicity and the kids. Hence, without wasting a second to explain anything to the people in the anteroom of his office, Oliver ran out. The traffic would be hell at this time, so he actually ran through the city.

While he was running, he did his best to push away any of the scenarios that tried to haunt him. The thought that Emmy had fallen from the climbing bars and onto her head or Tommy had run in front of a car or something had happened to Millie or Addie or William threatened to make his legs wobble and give in. He couldn’t let that happen. He had to be at the hospital as quickly as possible.

He was sure that he managed the distance in a new best time. Panic was probably the most successful even if most terrible motivation. Cool sweat was running down his back and soaking his shirt when he ran into the hospital hall and stopped at the reception desk, pushing past the small line of people waiting there with a mumbled apology.

“Oliver Queen. I think one of my kids was brought in by my wife.”

“I am sorry, Mr. Queen, but-“

When the young guy behind the desk looked up, Oliver shot him an angry glare. Years of questioning criminals had easily taught him how to put the fear of God into someone with just a single glare. Nobody would tell him that he had to wait or to calm down or anything like that.

“Your daughter is in room eight-one hundred thirteen.”

“Thanks.” Oliver had already turned away when he looked at the guy again. “Which daughter?”

“Adelaide Megan?”

“I don’t understand why that is a question, but… thanks.”

Addie. Something had happened to Addie. Why did it have to be Addie? Oliver was incapable of imagining any of his children being hurt in the hospital. That it was Addie just rubbed in a little worse because she was the youngest. At ten months, she was still a baby, and he just couldn’t imagine how scared she must have been, whatever had happened to her.

Oliver was still deep in his thoughts when he had already taken the stairs to the eighth floor. As soon as he pushed open the doors to the hallway, he looked to both sides. He could see the number one hundred thirteen, and immediately hurried towards it. He only knocked briefly before he already pushed the door open and stepped inside.

Felicity was standing at the foot of the small crib. At his entrance, she turned her head and looked at him, though. Oliver was already taking in a deep breath, about to ask what had happened, but Felicity gestured for him to be quiet. With one last look into the crib, she stepped away from the baby bed. In the next moment, she was already pressed against his. Her arms were caught between their bodies, her face hidden behind her hands to hide the tears that were falling as she was crying quietly. Her body was trembling, the shock of whatever had happened taking hold of her once more.

Quickly, Oliver wrapped his arms around Felicity’s shoulders and pulled her impossibly close against him. He shot a brief look at Addie, who seemed to be sleeping soundly. She was attached to an ECG, and a small tube under her nose was helping her breathing. It reminded him of what she had looked like when she had been born. She still looked as lost in the bed as she had looked back then with her 16.5 inches and 3.7 pounds. She was only wearing her diapers, exposing her skin that, under a thick layer of cream, seemed to be quite red.

Felicity was still trembling, so Oliver tightened his arms around her once more. He stroked his hand over her hair gently and lowered his lips to press a firm kiss to the crown of her head. As much as he wanted to know what had happened, he knew his priority had to be calming Felicity down. He wouldn’t get a single word out of her before she had calmed down. The heavy trembles that were still running through her body told him she was still far away from being calmed down, so Oliver started rocking her from one side to the other gently. It helped with their kids, so it would help now too.

Oliver didn’t know how long he held her like that, his eyes focused on the monitors to make sure Addie’s heart continued beating. As long as her heart was beating, everything was going to be okay. He could feel it in his bones.

“She just fell asleep,” Felicity whispered eventually. She fought her arms free from between then and wrapped them around his waist tightly. Oliver could feel her heart beating as quickly as his. “Or maybe she just passed out. She was so scared.”

Without pulling away from her, Oliver cupped Felicity’s cheeks in his hands and gently angled her head back. Her cheeks were wet from tears, her eyes red. Oliver wiped them away with his thumbs and kissed both of her eyes.

“What happened?” he asked a moment later, his voice lowered to a whisper.

The memory alone seemed to be enough to unsettle Felicity again. New tears were welling in her eyes, and once more her body started trembling. Oliver stroked his thumbs over her cheekbone, the tips of his fingers pressing into her scalp gently. It took a moment more before Felicity was able to take in a sniffling breath and nod, letting him know that she would reply.

“I wanted to work from home this afternoon, so I picked Millie up from her playgroup on my way home. They baked cookies together. I don’t know… She must have given Addie one to try. Raisa suddenly called me down. Addie was… she came out in a rash and she was coughing. Her tongue and lips were starting to swell. I… called the ambulance and they said it was an allergic reaction. They injected her with epinephrine and… I don’t know… everything went so fast.”

When new tears started falling, Oliver wiped them away. He nodded slowly, understanding that Felicity had trouble to talk about this. Oliver had found Felicity in the middle of a terrible allergic reaction once, and his panic had increased with each second that he hadn’t been able to find her emergency set. The thought of something like that happening to one of their kids made his stomach twist painfully.

“She’s going to stay here overnight?”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath. “I told them I wouldn’t leave the hospital before she was monitored for twenty-four hours and absolutely fine.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “And they agreed?”

“After I reminded them that our family is donating a lot of money to them each year, and that my husband is certainly become the next mayor, yes.”

“Kind of hot when you use me as a threat against someone, not that you need me for that. We both know you could make their lives living hells without my help really well.”

The ghost of an amused smile flashed over her face before she took in a deep breath. She snuggled her face into his touch, turning it at the same time to look at Addie.

“Do they already know what caused the reaction?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shook her head. “No, they told me to make an appointment with our pediatrician. Maybe you can make an appointment with Dr. Sanders for a test once you are home. I think I will rather stay here the night if that’s okay with you.”

“Sure,” Oliver told her. He nodded his head. “I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry. We will find out what caused this and make sure that Addie is never going to have contact to it again. Something like this is never going to happen to our baby girl again, even if I have to cook every meal for her for the rest of her life.”

“I have a suspicion what caused this.”

Oliver didn’t need her to say it to know what she assumed. “Peanuts?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “It would make sense. Raisa texted me. She asked the teacher what they used with the cookies, and one of the ingredients was peanut butter, and there is a genetic component to allergies.”

“Emmy, Tommy and Millie aren’t allergic, either.”

“They aren’t, but Addie might be.”

Oliver nodded slowly and shot another look at Addie, frowning slightly. “Aren’t first allergic reactions supposed to be less dangerous?”

“Maybe she tried something with peanuts before, and we didn’t realize?”

“I doubt we would miss an allergic reaction.”

Oliver had never had an allergic reaction, and, as far as he could recall, neither had his kids. Well, William was allergic to strawberries, but Samantha had found out about that long before Oliver had become a part of his son’s life. He knew from the few times Felicity had accidentally eaten peanuts how badly that could end, though. The thought how often something with peanuts had slipped into her food was actually frightening. While Felicity was able to help herself with epinephrine, Addie would completely depend on them. He guessed he could add missing the signs of an allergic reaction to the almost endless list of things that scared him.

“I hope we wouldn’t,” Felicity replied with a sigh. She leaned forward and rested her cheek against Oliver chest with a sigh. Her hands stroked up and down his back gently. “Were you very busy at the campaign office when I called?”

“There is nothing that would occupy me so much that I couldn’t come to the hospital in a case like this,” Oliver replied, “or that would keep me from staying here until later today.”

Felicity leaned her head back and smiled. “I wasn’t implying that. I just wanted to change the subject. I… need five minutes of getting my mind off this. I need to think about something else than the fact that there was an actual moment that our daughter dies in our home, and all I can do is stand next to her and look at her and-”

“It’s okay,” Oliver said quickly. He kissed her forehead. “It’s okay.”

He couldn’t imagine her fear, or maybe he could and just didn’t want to remember. He had been scared of losing one of their children already. He had been scared of it a few times in life already. All the happy moments of having this wonderful family had almost made him forget how much it hurt and how frightening it was to fear for your child’s life. He had lost his parents, but that was the cycle of life. You were supposed to survive them. You weren’t supposed to survive your children.

“You’re not saying anything,” Felicity whispered.

“Oh.” Oliver frowned. “Well, Thea and Robbie visited me.”

Felicity sighed, relieved that he had something to say that could take her mind off the situation at hand. Addie’s health was under control for now, so Oliver was sure that a moment of distraction wouldn’t hurt. He could need it was much as Felicity could.

“Does Thea want to come back?”

“One day,” Oliver replied, “but not yet. Of course she doesn’t want to come back yet. Robbie is still a baby. It took me two more kids after Tommy to be ready to try going back to work. Anyway, Thea just reminded me that I still have to decide who my deputy mayor should be.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Any ideas?”

“Not really.” Oliver smiled and bumped her nose with his. “If I loved you a little bit less, I’d ask you.”

“I think I’ll pass.”

Oliver chuckled. “I know. I would never ask you to give up your job. You love it too much to give up on it. It’s your way of doing good, and it’s good you have that.”

“Besides, we would totally get into fights all the time because we are spending too much time together.”

“No, we would love each second,” Oliver replied with a chuckle, not sure if he really believed that, or if it was just the romantic person speaking out of him. He sighed eventually. “No, really, I gotta find someone for that job.”

Felicity cocked her head. “You really have no idea?”

“The way you say that implies that you already have an idea, so I guess I am blind to the obvious again?”

“Maybe a little,” Felicity replied. She smiled and straightened up onto her toes to kiss his lips. “But don’t you worry. I might not be your deputy mayor, but I still got your back.”

“So, who do you-“

When Addie released a low cry, they both turned to the crib to see their baby had woken up. Felicity stepped out of his arms and lifted Addie against her chest, careful of the cables that were attached to her. Oliver put his arms around the two of them and kissed Addie’s forehead.

“Hi, Sweetie. What are you doing? You scared mommy and daddy for life,” he whispered. Addie grinned almost a little mischievously like she had planned it, making Oliver smile. “Yes, that’s my little troublemaker.”


	286. Starry night

“We should really do this more often.”

“We should,” Felicity replied, smiling at William. When she noticed the expression on Oliver’s face, she scratched her fingernails over his back teasingly. “I think your dad is going to give me a lecture on how busy his campaign is, though.”

Oliver snorted and lifted one of his fries. “If there is anything I am going to give you a lecture on, it’s the consequences of junk food for children. I will interrupt any work to have lunch with my family at any time. I’d prefer some healthy homemade food over junk food, though.”

Felicity puckered her lips. Without taking her eyes off Oliver, she grabbed the rest of her burger and pushed it into her mouth. When she hummed appreciatively, Oliver just rolled his eyes. With a smile, Felicity watched him helping Millie to take a sip from her milkshake that she threatened to spill all over the small table in a try to pull it closer. The truth was that they were both okay with their kids eating junk food every once in a while, especially because they were taking such good care of their kids diet otherwise. With Oliver and Raisa both loving to cook, the kids were getting everything they needed. Besides, snacks like vegetables and fruits were something that they offered the kids every day, and they ate it with enjoyment which Felicity doubted a lot of parents could say about their kids. Anyway, Oliver and Felicity loved teasing each other about junk food.

“Mommy?” Tommy asked, stepping next to Felicity. “When are we going?”

With a brief glance at her watch, Felicity smiled. “In five minutes, okay?”

Tommy nodded. “Okay.”

“Are you already excited, Buddy?” Oliver asked.

Again, Tommy nodded. “I like stars.”

“I know you do.”

“We all know,” Emmy added with a grin.

Indeed, it was no secret for family and friends that Tommy loved stars. Since Felicity had installed the star lights in Tommy’s room to give him something to relax when his back then newborn baby sister Millie was too much trouble for him, he loved them. He asked for someone to go to the astronomical observatory with him at least once each month. Tommy Merlyn even had a commutation ticket since the stars seemed to have the same calming effect they had on him as on him younger namesake. For the last three weeks he had picked up Tommy once each week, so they could watch the stars together. The two Tommies as Felicity liked to call the duo had become real close friends over the past months. Given how picky Tommy was with people he liked, Felicity knew that Tommy Merlyn could be really proud of himself with that.

“How much longer now, Mommy?”

Felicity chuckled. “Now, it’s four and a half minutes.”

Last week, she had read about an art exhibition that was here in Starling for the week. It was a light show that brought Van Gogh’s _Starry Night_ to life. As soon as Felicity had seen the article about it, she had asked Tommy if he wanted to go there, and he had been so excited that he had took the article with him everywhere and had shown it to everyone he had met. He had even asked Tommy Merlyn if he wanted to join them, but the older Tommy was busy with taken a look at a few possible locations for the club he and Roy wanted to build together.

Felicity watched her kids, who were eating and chatting happily. Through the last years, Felicity had noticed that she and Oliver seemed to be more and more busy with other things which made it hard to find time to spend with the kids, especially in a way that favored their hobbies and interests. When she had taken over Queen Inc., she had known that she’d have less time for her kids. Between her work at the company and the one in the Arrow Cave, there just hadn’t been much time for family. Her kids had been taken good care of by Oliver, so, apart from some moments of feeling guilty for not spending more time with them, she had known that Oliver would do anything to make them happy, and that had been okay. As their family has been growing, they had started to do most things all together rather than focusing on each kid individually. With Oliver running for mayor and the company expanding, there seemed to be less and less time, so Felicity was happy that she had found something to spend more quality time with at least one kid for today.

“Everything alright?” Oliver asked.

“Hm?” Felicity startled out of her thoughts. She looked at him with confusion for a moment before she waved it off. “Yeah, I am fine. I am just thinking we need to find more ways to spend more time with our kids and supporting their interests. I know it’s harder with the other kids because they don’t have an easily detectable hobby like that.”

Oliver nodded. “Yeah, I thought about the same. Sometimes I do something with just William, but that’s more because I am sure he doesn’t want to do all the things his siblings are old enough for. I will think about something for them.”

Felicity smiled and kissed his cheek. “Thank you. Tommy and I gotta go now.”

Immediately, Tommy jumped up from the floor and ran to put on his jacket. He grabbed Felicity’s coat and brought it to her then.

“Thank you,” Felicity said with a smile.

She zipped up Tommy’s jacket and helped him putting on his scarf and beanie before she slipped into her own coat. She kissed the crown of each of her kids’ head. As soon as she had straightened up from kissing Addie, Oliver took her hand and led her to the door.

“Have fun, you two,” Oliver told them. He pecked Felicity’s lips. “Call me when you know when you are home, and I will prepare dinner, healthy dinner with salad and vegetable and vitamins and all the nice little things you hate so much.”

“Ugh,” Felicity groaned mockingly. She pecked his lips once more and smiled. “Since you are the one making the food, it sounds great, though.”

“And you take good care of mommy,” Oliver asked Tommy.

Tommy nodded, grabbing Felicity’s hand. “Come on now, Mommy.”

Felicity chuckled. “Yes, we go now.”

Tommy hopped up and down excitedly while they were going to the car. He was smiling all over his face, so very happy about their little trip today. While they were driving through the city to the exhibition hall, Tommy kept talking about the stars and everything he knew about them. Given that he had a lot of books that, of course, he couldn’t read yet, and some CDs and videos about the stars, he knew a lot about them.

Felicity enjoyed listening to his talking. Tommy really wasn’t a talkative kid. With a sister like Emmy, who liked to talk all day long, he didn’t have much opportunity to say anything, though. The stars were the one thing he loved to talk about, so Felicity would do whatever she could to never make him lose interest in them. Just like with her and her love of computers, Tommy might actually take this love with him all through his life. Unlike Felicity, who had made her hobby her job, Tommy had already announced that he’d rather become a doctor than studying the stars.

As soon as Felicity had pulled into the parking lot, Tommy unfastened his seatbelt and reached for the door handle. He released a frustrated groan when the door didn’t open because of the child safety lock. Felicity turned off the engine, unfastened her seatbelt and turned around in her seat, so she could look at Tommy.

“Buddy?”

Tommy was still pulling at the door handle. After three more tries without success, he finally looked at his mother. Felicity could see that he was about to complain about not getting out. When she perked up her eyebrows, Tommy made a grumpy face and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

“Listen, Buddy,” Felicity asked. “I know you are excited. I am happy that you are excited because I am excited, too. We have to set some rules, though.”

Though Tommy was still looking at her grumpily – reminding her a lot of Oliver in old days when things in the Arrow Cave weren’t going the way he wanted them to go – Felicity knew he was listening.

“This is a parking lot, so there are cars. When I will get out, I will open your door, and we will go into the exhibition hall together, okay?”

Tommy nodded. “Okay.”

“Good.” Felicity smiled. “Then we have to buy tickets and go to the wardrobe, so we can get rid of our jackets.”

Again, Tommy nodded. He didn’t look convinced, but he nodded.

“Well, and there are going to be a lot of other people who want to see the stars too, so we can’t be too loud okay? We can talk, but then we will have to whisper.”

Once more, Tommy nodded. Felicity waited for another two seconds, making sure Tommy wasn’t too hyped, before she got out of the car and helped Tommy out too. Hand in hand, they went to the exhibition hall. Tommy was moving from one foot onto the other nervously, but he stayed close to Felicity’s side and didn’t ran off like Felicity had feared he would. Tommy took the cloakroom ticket and put it in the pocket of his jeans, proud that he was trusted with it.

While they took the few stairs to the actual exhibition room, Felicity could feel Tommy’s nervousness growing. Unlike she had predicted, Tommy wasn’t getting hyped with his nervousness, though. Instead, he was growing all quiet. He pressed closer and closer to Felicity’s leg. Just before they entered the exhibition room, he held out his hand for Felicity, and she took it, squeezing it comfortingly.

As soon as they entered the room, Tommy’s eyes grew wide. He looked around thoroughly, taking everything in. Since they were standing in the middle of the way, Felicity tugged at his hand gently to make him move. Tommy stayed close by while they started exploring the room.

Thanks to the fact that it was an early afternoon in the middle of the week, the exhibition was relatively empty. It allowed them to take their time as they looked at the animated light projections. Nobody was talking, so Tommy had the calm he needed to really focus on everything he could see here.

While Tommy took everything in, Felicity watched her son. Tommy was a quiet boy. Much like his daddy, he liked to keep things for himself. He was the most content when he was left alone. He didn’t trust people easily, and he liked things around him to be quiet. When he really loved something like it was the case with stars or really loved someone like it was mostly the case with his mommy, he seemed to thrive, though.

It was wonderful seeing him taken in everything so intently and with an awe in his eyes that could only make Felicity smile. The entire time they were spending at the exhibition, Tommy kept quiet. He leaned his head against Felicity’s hip every once in a while, never stopping to watch the lights moving. When he wanted to show Felicity something, he squeezed her hand and pointed at whatever had caught his attention.

By the time the exhibition was getting fuller in the late afternoon, Tommy was so tired that Felicity was surprised that he was still standing on his feet. His eyes slipped shut whenever he rested his head against her hip. With a smile, Felicity moved her fingers through his hair and crouched down in front of him.

“Are you ready to go home, Buddy?” she whispered.

Tommy looked around once more with a dreamy smile. Rubbing his hands over his eyes, he nodded his head, though. Felicity smiled and kissed his cheek.

“Alright. Then let’s go home.”

When Felicity took the first step towards the door, Tommy pulled at her hand and reached out his arms for her. With a smile, Felicity picked him up in his arms and kissed his cheek. She carried him to the car, and he fell asleep before they reached it. Felicity smiled when she put Tommy into his seat and fastened the seatbelt. This had been a wonderful day and a great memory that she would carry in her heart forever now. She was sure Tommy felt the same way.


	287. A night among friends

Oliver closed the door to Addie’s nursery behind him as quietly as possible. Not daring to move or to release the breath he was holding, he listened to the noises coming from behind the door that were echoed over the baby monitor too. Except for Addie’s deep and even breathing and the soft melody that came from the music box he had switched on because he knew it calmed Addie down and helped her staying asleep, it was all quiet, though.

After waiting two more minutes without anything happening, Oliver tiptoed to the stairs. When he reached the head of it, and Addie appeared to still be fast asleep, he closed his eyes and finally released a sigh of relief. After almost forty-five minutes of doing his best to get Addie to fall asleep, he had finally managed to achieve his goal. He was actually lucky that it had been only forty-five minutes. There were evenings that it took more than two hours for their youngest to fall asleep.

Quickly, and yet as quietly as possible, Oliver went down the stairs. He had just reached the middle of them when he caught sight of Felicity. A smile spread on his lips as he stood still and watched her. She was standing at the small table next to the door, trying to find the best place in her purse to put her keys. She was humming some melody, swaying her hips in time with the music. Oliver’s mouth watered at the sight. With the high-heeled booth and the tightfitting, short dress she was wearing, her thighs and butt looked too tempting to resist touching them.

Even before Oliver knew what he was doing, his legs were already carrying him over towards her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lowered his head to the crook of her neck. As soon as his lips pressed against her pulse point, kissing her neck gently, Felicity leaned back against Felicity’s chest with a content sigh.

“And here I thought you had already fallen asleep with Addie,” Felicity whispered. She shot a brief look at her watch. “You did need forty-five minutes after all. I guess you are just too old for a baby.”

“I am not that old,” Oliver growled against her skin.

Felicity chuckled. “Really? You are turning forty next year.”

“That’s not old. That’s experienced.”

When Felicity snorted, Oliver growled and scratched his teeth against Felicity’s tender skin gently. Felicity reacted to it with a mixture of a gasp and sigh. Her hand grabbed the short hair at the back of his neck, though, pulling him closer. It easily gave away that she enjoyed this and wanted more. So, with a smile, Oliver kissed better where his teeth had caused, even if enjoyable, pain. The tip of his tongue moved over her soft skin. His nose pressed to her skin as he breathed her in.

“You are lucky you got to put Millie to bed.”

“She fell asleep in three minutes.”

“I hate you a little right now.”

Before Felicity could reply, Oliver tightened his hold on her hips and turned her around. He took a step closer to her, capturing her between the wall and his body. With his hands behind her knees, he lifted her against the wall and pressed his hips to hers. She was feeling so good and smelling so good. The mixture of her skin and her favorite perfume, a sweet scent he loved very much on her, had an almost intoxicating effect on him. When he was nervous, it calmed him down. When he was sad, it cheered him up. When he was feeling unsafe, it took away her fear. When he was turned on, in only turned him on more, especially when the taste of her tongue was added to the sensations that enveloped him. Oliver groaned.

He could so easily get lost in her. Oliver knew they both had plans. Felicity was spending the evening with Laurel, Lyla, Thea and Donna, while Oliver was spending the evening with Tommy, John, Roy and Quentin. They went out with their friends, a girls’ night and a boys’ night separately from each other. It had been Roy’s idea, and everyone had agreed that it was a good idea. They were not spending enough time together as friends, so they had set the date and planned everything out. Raisa was taking care of the kids in the meantime. Roy was even going to bring Robbie over.

Thinking about it now that Felicity was pressed so close to him and their lips were moving together so harmonically in a slower growing kiss, Oliver had no idea why they wanted to go out. It made no sense. It was a Saturday night. Their kids were all healthy. He and Felicity didn’t have to go to the bunker to save the city or attend any boring parties for his campaign or her company. They could have the evening all for themselves. With how much Oliver longed to be close to Felicity and how much he could feel her enjoying his closeness right now too, it was stupid to go out. He should carry her upstairs and enjoy her body.

“Mr. Oliver? Mrs. Felicity?”

Felicity pushed at Oliver’s shoulders quickly. As little as he wanted to pull away, Oliver let go of her with one last kiss. When he turned around, standing right in front of Felicity, so she could adjust the position of her skirt that had been ridden up with his movements, Oliver saw Raisa standing in the door to the living room with a slightly embarrassed smile.

“I am sorry.”

“It’s fine, Raisa,” Oliver said quickly. “And you know that you can just call us Oliver and Felicity.”

He bit down on his tongue slightly. He knew that the only time that Raisa still called them Mr. Oliver and Mrs. Felicity was when she wasn’t exactly sure how to deal with a situation. Oliver also knew that she hadn’t been treated particularly nicely by the last people she had worked for. Hence, she wasn’t always sure if she was allowed to be amused for a situation of If she should be shy and embarrassed.

Raisa only smiled shyly in response to his words. “Are Camille and Adelaide asleep?”

Oliver nodded. “Yes, they are both asleep.”

When Oliver handed her the monitor, Raisa smiled at the sight of the two sleeping kids shortly. Then she added, “Emmeline and Thomas are watching a movie. I am going to put them to bed after it. William called. He arrived at Ms. Audrey’s home safely.”

“Good.” Oliver smiled. “Thank you, Raisa.”

“When are you going to leave?”

“I’m gone in two minutes,” Felicity said. “Unlike others, I am already dressed to go.”

“Unlike others, I don’t need hours to change. Hence, there is no time pressure. Tommy is only picking me up-“

The door bell rang. As soon as it fell silent, Addie’s cries sounded over the monitor. Oliver squeezed his eyes shut with a groan.

“I guess he’s picking you up now,” Felicity whispered with an amused grin. “Too bad you are not dressed and still have to take care of Addie first.”

She kissed his cheek and grabbed her coat. Walking to the door, she said to Raisa, “If anything is going wrong, call Oliver. I feel like he will be a lot less drunk than I will be, especially given his delayed start.”

Oliver shot her a pretendedly angry look. They just loved teasing each other like that or in any way really. When Felicity opened the door, Tommy was already reaching out his hand to ring the bell once more.

“Hi,” Felicity said with a smile. “Come in. Make yourself at home. I am sure Raisa can serve you a drink. Oliver is going to need a little more time. He doesn’t have control over his daughter.”

“She only got lucky that she got to put Millie to bed,” Oliver said with a slight grumble, “and Millie is just the easiest little girl to take care of on the entire earth. She doesn’t wake up from the doorbell, either.”

Tommy puckered his lips. “Oops?”

Felicity patted his shoulder and kissed his cheek. “Don’t let him tell you it was your fault. He just didn’t get Addie to really fall asleep yet. Bye, Boys.”

Oliver watched Felicity going to the limousine that was waiting for her to pick up the rest of the Arrow Family Ladies. He pushed his tongue into his cheek, not missing how her hips swayed a little more than they usually did. Oliver doubted it was a coincidence, and he knew it really wasn’t when she turned around to wink at him before getting into the limousine.

Tommy was still standing in the door, so Oliver beckoned for him to come in.

“Sorry for waking her up,” Tommy said, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I guess as kid you have to sneak in, so the parents don’t notice anything. As an adult, you have to be quiet, so the kids don’t notice anything.”

“Kind of.” Oliver chuckled before he waved his friend’s apology off. “Addie just doesn’t like sleeping. Like Felicity said, go into the living room. Emmy and Tommy are watching a movie. I am sure they will be delighted to have you join them for a while. Raisa, can you-“

“Of course,” Raisa replied immediately. She smiled brightly, always happy when she got something to do. “Mr. Thomas, what can I offer you?”

“I think a water will do it for now.”

Raisa led Tommy into the living room while Oliver went upstairs. The boys’ night out would have to wait a few minutes more. Yet, Oliver was determined to have just as much fun as he was sure the girls were going to have too.

 

 

“So, you really don’t do this more often?” Tommy asked, taking a sip of his coke. “I mean you guys have to spend so much time together doing… your team thing… you really don’t meet up privately more?”

Looking around into the faces of his friends, Tommy leaned back against the cool leather and stretched out his legs under the table. He couldn’t deny that he was a little tired by now. Since he had come back to Starling years after his resurrection, he hadn’t been out this long. Apart from the fact that he still felt like he was new to life, he also felt like the ten years that his father had taken from him had made him about a hundred years older than he looked. Still, this had been and still was a really great evening.

“I am not on the team,” Quentin said after a moment when nobody else said anything, “and I might be a little too old for spending late nights out in bars.”

“You are an honorary member of the team,” Oliver told Quentin what he – or had it been John? – had told Felicity when they had asked her to join them officially after she had saved his life the night his mother had shot him. “You might not be exactly on the team, but you are a part of the team nonetheless.”

“Oh, please no sentiments,” Roy asked, “or I might have to try calling Raisa and ask how Robbie is doing again, and she was already pissed when I called the last three times. I am not sure I will ever get back into her good graces.”

Oliver chuckled. “I doubt that Raisa was pissed. She understands that you miss your little boy and are worried about him.”

“Yet, you don’t text her all ten minutes or call her once an hour,” Tommy said, “and you have five kids on her watch.”

“I am just relaxed. I know Raisa got things handled.”

John snorted amusedly. “You are relaxed because you god enough practice with your five kids. You should have seen him when Emmy was a baby. He was strictly against leaving her with a babysitter, including all of his family and friends.”

“Donna had to beat him up to get even a single night with her first and up to that date only grandchild,” Quentin added. “She is still holding it against him secretly.”

“I think Donna even switched off her phone when she was watching Emmy,” Roy said. “I think she wanted to beat him up for his umpteen calls whenever she was watching her.”

Tommy knew he shouldn’t be surprised. His best friend, who had used to party with him and sleep around and never seemed to be willing to settle for just one girl or anything but a life of fun really, was no longer that guy. He had changed when he had come back from the island and even more since the Undertaking. Now he was married and not only happily married but so much in love with his wife that he didn’t have eyes for any other woman though it still wasn’t lacking offers. During the five hours they had spent in the bar here, at least twelve women had tried to slip Oliver their numbers. It seemed to be normal because Oliver had easily stopped them before they could have gone too far. Tommy actually imagined him to be holding out his kids as a shield to protect himself against the many offers of women that he wasn’t interested in. He was also sure that, when they had been teenagers or in the beginning of their twenties, Oliver would have gladly taken every single number and kept them for bad times or when he was just bored. Tommy couldn’t blame him. He would have done the same.

He had changed too, after all. They had both changed, coming from a long way of pain that had made them see what was really important in life. Just like Oliver, the five years he had been gone had changed him. The time with his father a year after Oliver’s comeback had changed him even more. He was a completely different person. He might not know what kind of person he was, but a different one. That was for sure.

Biting down on his tongue, Tommy suppressed a sigh. He was glad that his collaboration with Roy was finally starting to get rolling. They had two estates that they wanted to choose between. If everything went the way they hoped for, they could really start diving into work by the middle of the month, well, Tommy could since it would be mainly his project. He really could use the work because he didn’t want to annoy Oliver and his family or Thea and hers all the time. Besides, it would distract him from everything else, mainly the dilemma of not knowing where his life would go from here. He loved spending time with Oliver’s kids and his godson Robbie. They were all so lovely that Tommy almost wished he would have a family, too. He had never really thought about wanting kids, though, and he actually doubted that he was really fit for it after everything that had happened. Besides, who should he have kids with?

“Okay, is that my wife over there or is that a fata morgana of her because I did miss her all evening long? Maybe my brain is just imagining her here.”

At Oliver’s words, Tommy looked up. It took him a moment before he realized where Oliver was looking, and, indeed, Felicity was there, followed by Thea, Lyla, Donna and finally Laurel. They were just considering taking a booth close to the bar when Laurel turned her head and found Tommy’s eyes. He smiled hesitatingly and waved. She smiled back and tapped her finger against Thea’s shoulder, gesturing towards them.

“Hey, what are you doing here?”

Thea didn’t wait for an answer. Instead, she slid onto Roy’s lap and captured his lips in a kiss that made Tommy look away. He had trouble finding anything to look at, though, as the rest of the ladies joint them too. They had obviously running on a higher level of alcohol, and that alcohol seemed to make them very happy that they were back with their men.

“You will get used to it.”

At Laurel’s words, Tommy looked at her. She was standing next to him, smiling comfortingly. If her body posture was any indication, she wasn’t exactly comfortable either. Tommy guessed it was more about talking to him, though. Their friendship was weird since he had come back. They had talked about what had happened between them before he had died. He knew that she was sorry about what had happened, and that she had been confused about the whole Oliver being dead and then alive thing and now the same was happening with him and… it was just all complicated and so uncomfortable.

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” Laurel gestured to the kissing and cuddling couples. “This.”

Tommy looked at their friends. Quentin had rested his head against Donna’s shoulder, looking like he was close to fall asleep. Roy and Thea were teasing each other about who had annoyed Raisa more tonight. John and Lyla were smiling at each other, not saying a word, but apparently having a wordless conservation nonetheless. Only Oliver and Felicity were still kissing, whispering words Tommy should probably be relieved he didn’t understand between kisses.

“How was your night?” Tommy asked her after a moment.

“Great,” Laurel replied. She smiled brightly. “I am especially happy that Thea is breastfeeding and, hence, not drinking. If you went out with these four and you are the only one sober, you know how hard Oliver’s and Felicity’s life with kids has to be. I once spent an evening just making sure everyone was staying together and getting home safe.”

Tommy grinned. “I had your dad on my side.”

They both smiled at each other before Tommy lowered his eyes. He wasn’t sure what he felt for Laurel. He knew there was a fondness for her deep in his heart. He just wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to give them another chance. Their first try had already been terribly messy with the history she shared with his best friend and then just everything that had happened. He needed friends more than he needed a girlfriend. With what he had been going through, it was hard making friends, though. Keeping a part of who he was to himself would never get them real friends. He had seen it with Oliver when he had come back from the island. Besides, he didn’t know if she was interested and it was just too complicated.

“So, should we order some more drinks?” Donna asked.

“Sure,” John replied immediately. He perked up his eyebrows as he looked at Lyla. “Or did you have enough already?”

Lyla snorted. “If someone had enough alcohol, it’s Felicity.”

“Whaaaat?” Felicity asked.

She turned around in Oliver’s arms quickly to look at Lyla. The movement almost made her lose her balance, though. If it hadn’t been for Oliver’s arms to wrap around her waist safely, she might have slipped and fallen.

“Well, we could-“

Before Oliver could finish his sentence, Felicity quickly turned back in his arms once more. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes and whispered something into Oliver’s ear. If Tommy wasn’t wrong, his friend had to bite down on his tongue hard. At least his jaw tensed before he cleared his throat.

“Sorry, but we are out. We are heading home.”

“I am actually kind of tired too. Maybe we could share a taxi or the limo if-“ When everyone started to shake their heads, Tommy stopped. “Or maybe I will stay for one drink more.”

“Okay, Guys,” Oliver hurried to say. “Thanks for the evening. We gotta do this again. See you soon and-“

“Hey, what about Robbie?” Thea asked.

“Oh, just pick him up tomorrow,” Felicity suggested. “He’s fine with us.”

Not waiting for any answer, they hurried to the exit. When Felicity seemed to be swaying a little too much from the alcohol, Oliver wrapped his arms around her from behind and lifted her off the floor, carrying her.

“I guess our son is being held hostage now,” Roy said. He beckoned for the waitress to come to them. “That calls for hard alcohol.”

Tommy sat down next to John and frowned slightly. “Do you think they will-“

“-have sex in the limo?” John asked.

“Definitely,” Laurel replied with a nod.

“Well, who can blame them? My daughter and my son-in-law are hot,” Donna said. When Quentin shot her a pretended angry look, she kissed his cheek. “As hot as my man here.”

“Yeah, but I still wished they’d be a little subtler about it,” Thea said. “I mean that’s my brother we are talking about here. I wished I didn’t know as much about his sex life as I knew. ”

Laurel chuckled. “Weren’t you the one totally supporting their sex life at the start, even spending evenings at my place, so they could have fun?”

“Yeah, but that was nine years ago. I thought they’d stop being that hungry for another.”

Tommy grinned quietly. As little as he wanted to think about his friend having sex, he was happy for him. He knew from own experience what Oliver had been going through, spending years away from everyone and everything he knew, being tortured and trained into a monster only to come back as someone that nobody understood and that he himself didn’t know who or what he was. They had been through the same thing, a horror created by the same person. Oliver had found a place in the world, a place close to a person who seemed to have brought back the joy to his life.

Tommy glanced at Laurel, who was looking at photos of Robbie on Thea’s phone. She was smiling at the photos of the baby boy. Tommy watched her for a moment, thinking to himself that, maybe one day, he would get the chance to be just as happy and as in love as Oliver was now.


	288. Imbalance

“Why are you putting on your jacket?” Oliver looked at her with an incredulous expression in his eyes and fastened his stand in front of the door, blocking the way in case she really wanted to leave. “You can’t leave when I am coming home.”

Felicity chuckled, continuing to button down her coat. “I wanted to use this rare moment of having some sun to take a little walk with Addie. Everyone else is rather staying home to cook with Raisa. You have the choice to either help them or to come with me, but I should add that you are probably just in their way because Raisa, William, Emmy, Tommy and Millie are a great time. Besides, I might not come back if I am out there all alone. I could get lost or… fond some new friends to hang out with… or something”

“Well, it is a tough choice to make, but I guess I will join you on your walk.”

With a low hum and an amused smile on her lips, because of course Oliver picked up on her not so subtle attempt to make him know that she wanted company. She straightened up onto the tip of her toes, pressing her chest to his and wrapping her arms around his neck. Moving her fingers into the short hair at the nape of his neck, she pecked his lips.

“Because we both know you’d be hopelessly lost if I wouldn’t come back?”

“No, because it’s cold, and I don’t want Addie out there all night.”

Felicity slapped Oliver’s chest playfully. She tried to step away, but Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist quickly and kept her close to him. His lips were chasing after hers, but Felicity leaned away, looking at him with a pretendedly angry glare.

“No, I don’t like you to anymore now,” she said teasingly, frowning at him angrily at the same time, though. “You are mean to me.”

She did her best to avoid his lips which was a lot easier said than done because Oliver was quite good at predicting her movements, so his lips always followed very close to hers. She could even feel his stubble shallowly scratching her chin a few times, and Felicity had to suppress an amused giggle to prolong their game a little longer. When Addie released a grumpy sound, not so fond of being left waiting in the stroller that didn’t even allow her to crawl anywhere where things could be more exciting, Felicity quickly wound herself out of Oliver’s arms, though.

“I think you should take care of Addie,” she said, still using her teasing tone. “I am sure you want to make sure that you are taking her back home with you safe again.”

Oliver crouched down before Addie. “Hi, Cutie-Pie. Can you say ‘dada’ now?”

“Hey,” Felicity complained, slapping his shoulder. “We said we weren’t going to urge her to say ‘mama’ or ‘dada’ first.”

“I am not urging her to do anything. I am just asking if she can say it already,” Oliver said innocently, grinning back at her over her shoulder. He quickly pouted then and rubbed his hand over his shoulder, though. “Besides, stop hitting me.”

“Stop making her try to say ‘dada’ first.”

“Well, she had to say a word eventually, and I just want it to be a good one. We don’t want her to say ‘Frack’ or ‘ass’ or… I don’t know… something like that at first, right?”

“Maybe. But really, you’ve been a much more supportive husband last year at this time when you tried to convince Millie to say ‘mama’ first.” Felicity pushed her bottom lip forward. “You are no good husband anymore. If you continue like this, we won’t make it to ten years of marriage. I feel so unloved.”

Oliver cocked his head at her, shooting her a look that made Felicity drop all pretense and made her chuckle. With a wink, she turned to the banister of the stairs and grabbed her scarf that she had put there. She held the door open for Oliver to push the stroller out, grabbed her keys from the small table next to the door and quickly caught up to Oliver and Addie. She linked her arm with his, sneaking her fingers under the sleeve of his coat and stroking her fingertips over his soft wrist. She rested her head against his shoulder and sighed contently when Oliver pressed his lips to the crown of her head.

That way, they walked to the small park that was only a few streets away. Neither of them was saying a word. They enjoyed the moment of quiet. Life around them was so busy most of the time, filled with work at QI or Oliver’s campaign office and their big family, that they enjoyed whenever there were quiet moments to share. One of the best things of knowing someone as well as they knew each other and of being connected so deeply as they were was that they didn’t need to talk all the time. They could comfortably spend time in silence.

“How was your day at QI?” Oliver asked eventually.

“Good.” Felicity smiled. “I talked to Bruce today. It still feels weird that he’s not flirting, but I think we are finding a common ground that we are both comfortable with. He really is doing the best he can to prove to me that he is being serious about being my friend.”

“That’s great,” Oliver replied and rested his cheek against the top of her head. “I wouldn’t want you to lose your friend because I know that is what Bruce is to you.”

With a smile, Felicity rested her head back to look at Oliver’s face. She could see in the content expression on his face that he meant what he had said. Of course she had known he did. Yet, it amazed her how relaxed Oliver was with talking about Bruce. Felicity was sure that other husbands were less calm when their wives told them they liked flirting with other men or one other man actually. Oliver trusted her without any reservations, though. He knew she had just had fun with Bruce’s flirting because she had known he hadn’t been serious, and yet it had boosted her ego a little. For Oliver that was okay because he trusted her.

“Bobo.”

Oliver bent over the stroller to look at Addie. “Hey, if your first word is ‘Bruce’ or ‘Batman’, we two will have a serious problem for the rest of our lives, and it’s still a long life for you, so better don’t ruin your relationship with me.”

Addie squealed in amusements as if she had understood exactly what her daddy had just said. She kicked her legs in excitement and waved up and down with her arms. Felicity smiled at the sight. With their busy lives, it wasn’t only hard to find quiet moments. Sometimes, it even seemed to be hard to find moments to watch Oliver with their kids. When he had still been a stay-at-home dad, there had been so many more possibilities to do so.

Eventually, Oliver straightened up and directed his eyes on the path ahead of him. With the warm sun of the late afternoon shining through the leafless treetops, he looked like an angel bathing in light. It brought out the deep blue of his eyes, and the strong line of his jaw was accentuated just the right way. His hair and stubble looked more blond than the peppered tone that had taken over in the last months and years. He looked at least ten years younger.

Resting her chin against Oliver’s shoulder, Felicity smiled at him. She enjoyed looking at him like that. She wanted to memorize what his face looked like in this moment. Who knew when they had the next moment for themselves?

“You are smiling at me,” Oliver said after a moment, not turning his head to look at her. Of course he would just know that she was smiling at him. He had probably felt it deep in his bones. “Is there a reason for that?”

“My crush on you is growing right now.”

Oliver smiled, only shooting her a brief look before he looked back ahead of them. “It is?”

Felicity’s smile widened and hummed in conferment. “Yes.”

For a long moment, Oliver just smiled. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t even look at her. He just looked at the path through the park they followed and smiled.

Eventually, he turned his eyes a little to look around. Something in his face changed. There was the slightest of a crease between his eyebrows, and he puckered his lips.

Just when Felicity wanted to follow his eyes to wherever he was looking, Oliver stopped, though. Pushing the stroller back and forth with one arm to make sure Addie wouldn’t grow discontent, Oliver turned around to her and wrapped his other arm around her waist to pull her against him. Felicity’s hands came to rest on his chest, stroking up and down over his coat. Oliver was smiling amusedly, a glint of something Felicity couldn’t name sparkling in his eyes as he looked at her.

“What?” Felicity asked, perking up an eyebrow.

Oliver smiled. “I love you, you know that?”

“I do,” Felicity replied without any hesitation or any doubt, “and I love you too.”

Oliver let his hand move up her back and over her shoulder to the side of her neck where his fingertips stroked over her pulse point. He took her shin between his thumb and forefinger, angling her head back a little. His nose bumped against her, eliciting a quiet chuckle from Felicity. She loved when he was that playful.

Only a few moments later, he leaned in. His lips brushed against hers lightly a couple of times before he finally before they pressed down more. Felicity sighed against his lips, opening them to the touch of his tongue. Her heartbeat was quickening, her breath hitching. It didn’t matter how many times Oliver would kiss her in their life together. She would always feel like it was the very first time because even in their first kiss there had been a familiarity that only the deep bond of two loving souls could create.

When their lips parted, Oliver rest his forehead against Felicity’s. His warm breath was ghosting over her face, eliciting goosebumps on her neck that spread their way all down her back. The tip of his nose stroked over her nasal bridge. He pecked her lips once more before he pulled away.

“What was that for?”

Felicity lifted her hand to his face, scratching her short nails through his stubble. She remembered how Oliver had once shaved his beard to get into Tommy’s good graces as their little baby boy as he had been back then hadn’t been too fond of the hair in his father’s face. Despite growing up with the stubble, he just hadn’t liked it. He had gotten used to it now, though. Anyway, while Tommy had been delighted by the beard being gone neither Emmy nor Felicity had shared that fondness of Oliver’s shaved face. Of course Felicity loved her husband no matter what he looked like. He could grow long hair or gain a potbelly or cut off an arm, and she would still love him the same. No change of looks would ever change that. Felicity had trouble considering anything that would made her fall out of love with him. The same applied to shaving or growing his beard. She couldn’t deny that she had a fondness for the short scruff. It just looked too good on him.

“Just because.”

Oliver pecked her lips once more before they turned to continue their way. Felicity rested her head back against Oliver’s shoulder and was already about to dwell into daydreams of lying back in their warm bed and snuggle up to him tonight when Felicity noticed the eyes that were on them. The park wasn’t exactly full of people, but at least some seemed to have had the same idea Felicity had had when she had decided to use this rare sun of March to take Addie for a walk. Some people, mostly women, were there. Most of them were looking at them, watching them. Well, actually they were watching Oliver, looking at him like they were about to prey upon them.

Felicity shot Oliver a brief look and rolled her eyes at the innocent expression on his face. He had certainly noticed and not so subtly made sure that everyone knew where he belonged. If pushing a stroller and having a woman basically clinging to his arm was not helping, a passionate kiss surely would make them stop. If that had been his reasoning, he had been wrong. They were still staring.

“Why is it that, in the eyes of the society, men are only growing hotter when they get older, while women are only getting old?”

“Do you really ask me that?” Oliver chuckled. “Hey, I never agreed with that.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Really? You wouldn’t exchange a version of me that is ten years younger against this version of me?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No, of course not.” Oliver leaned closer, so his lips touched her ear. “The ten years younger version doesn’t carry my mark all over her body like you do after last night.”

Felicity slapped Oliver’s shoulder playfully and chuckled. “You are impossible. Can you think about anything else?”

Oliver grinned. “I can also think about all the marks I can leave on your body tonight.”

Laughing, Felicity let her head fall back. If Oliver’s growing love for her body was any indication, he really didn’t agree with the perspective of society on this.

“Besides, didn’t we recently learn that you are the hot mom?” Oliver asked.

“Well, I am quite young to be William’s mother, and didn’t you tell me that the girl at his age would totally be into you?”

“Well, if they had seen me, sure,” Oliver said with a grin before he shrugged his shoulders. “I guess keeping lists of hot parents is a boys’ thing to do.”

“Did you have a list of hot moms?”

Oliver puckered his lips. “Maybe.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Felicity asked. Before he could say anything more, she quickly added, “No, I didn’t have a list of hot dads.”

“Well, to be fair, the only reason that really worked for us boys back at school was that a lot of the rich dads were married to younger women.” Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Anyway, you are a hot mama. I mean for your age.”

Felicity gasped for breath dramatically. Of course she knew that Oliver was saying that to tease her and because she loved to tease him about his age. Just when she wanted to say something, though, someone was quicker to reply.

“Mama.”

Looking at her youngest daughter in surprise, Felicity saw her turning her head back in the stroller to smile at her mother. As soon as their eyes met, Addie squealed and reached her hands out for her mama.

“Hey, Baby,” Felicity said gently. She went around the stroller to unfasten the belt that made sure Addie wouldn’t escape the stroller. She lifted her into her arms and kissed her cheek. “Can you say that again?”

“Mama.”

Felicity smiled and peppered Addie’s face with kisses. The little girl giggled amusedly, enjoying the kisses.

“You did everything right, my little darling. You chose the best first word there is.”

When Oliver snorted, Felicity looked up and grinned at him in amusement.

“Best word,” he repeated rolling his eyes. “Pffft.”

Felicity chuckled, stepping closer to him and stroking her hand over his cheek. “Poor baby, it’s two to one for me now which means two to one is our end result. I guess I have won on this after all though you have been so sure that all our kids would say dada first when Emmy said her first word.”

“Yeah, well, let’s be honest. If I hadn’t helped with Millie, she would have certainly said ‘dada’ first. I mean mama might be hotter, but dada is so much cooler, and I am pretty sure that cool wins over hot here. They are kids after all.” When Felicity grinned in amusement, Oliver narrowed his eyes at her for a moment before he sighed dramatically. “Our marriage is full of imbalance now.”

“Full of imbalance?” Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “Where else do you see imbalance?”

“Everywhere,” Oliver whispered, putting his hand to his heart in a dramatic gesture. “We are never going to be the way that we used to be. We will never be equals again.”

Felicity put her hand to his cheek and patted it gently. With an amused grin she said, “It’s nice that you thought we were equals, but let’s not forget who makes the calls here.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed her lips briefly. “I love having you call the shots.”

“I love calling the shots,” Felicity replied with a grin. “It’s why we are such a good team.”

“Yes, we are.” Oliver kissed her lips once more before he stroked his hand over Addie’s hair and added, “We’ll just learn saying ‘dada’ these next weeks, so it’s your second word, right?”

“Watch it become Bruce,” Felicity teased, and, with a fullhearted laugh, she started to continue their way.

Oliver was frozen into place for a moment before he called after her, “Now you are really being mean.”


	289. Boys being boys

“I’m home,” Felicity called as soon as she had unlocked the door. When she didn’t get a reply, she frowned. “Hello?”

“We’re in the kitchen.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose and puckered his lips. _We’re in the kitchen_ was not the response she wanted to get. She wanted her kids to run towards her like they usually did with their arms spread to hug her and tell her about their days. It had always been the part of her day that she loved to look forward to the most. She wanted to know everything that was going on in her kids life when she had to spend most of it apart from them.

Leaving her shoes by the door, she walked into the kitchen with bare feet. She’d never understand women on TV that were shown wearing their high heels at home. Well, actually she did understand because she was sure men in the writers’ room were behind that. Anyway, nothing would ever stop her from losing her shoes the moment she stepped into her house, sometimes even before that.

“Tommy,” Felicity said with a smile when she saw their friend leaning against the kitchen counter and drinking from a bottle of beer. “I didn’t-“

Clearing his throat, Oliver stepped between Felicity and Tommy before she could finish her sentence or greet Tommy with a hug. Oliver pursed his lips and cocked his head slightly. Clearing his throat once more, he crossed his arms in front of his chest. With the rolled-up sleeves of his shirt, his muscular arms were accentuated in the perfect way, but Felicity only noticed that briefly. She perked up her eyebrows, wordlessly demanding an explanation.

“We’ve been apart all day,” Oliver said matter-of-factly, “and who’s the first person to be greeted when you come back home?”

“Usually the kid that runs into my arms first.” Felicity pushed her bottom lip forward and took in a markedly sniffling breath. “I was robbed of that today.”

“Well, that’s Tommy fault. He got them a new book, and now-“

“What?” Felicity asked indignantly and straightened up onto the tip of her toes, so she could look over Oliver’s shoulder at Tommy. “How dare you?”

Tommy lifted his hands in a gesture of innocence. “I saw the book when I was in the city with Robbie to give Thea and Roy a little time alone. It was the same book my mom always read to me when I was a kid. I don’t remember much about it or about her, but I remember that she always read stories from that book for me, and I loved it very much.”

Felicity smiled faintly, touched by Tommy’s words. Neither she nor Oliver came from a perfect family, but Tommy’s childhood must have been pure hell. Malcolm’s heart had filled with hate and thirst for revenge the moment Rebecca had died in the Glades. He had spent most of his time away, more focused on avenging his wife than on helping his son through his grief. His own grief had taken him as far as planning on destroying the Glades, killing hundreds in the wake of the Undertaking, including Tommy. Then he had brought him back only to keep him under his control and train him with the same cruel techniques that he had used on Thea and others had used on Oliver and Sara before. That he shared this little part of his childhood, a happy piece of it, with them and their kids meant a lot to Felicity.

“That’s really sweet,” she said with a smile. “Thank you for that. The kids certainly love the book. They always enjoy stories and-“

“-and ever forget to welcome their mommy back home when they get a new one.”

Felicity scrunched up her nose. “Yes, I am a little bit angry with you for that.”

“See?” Oliver asked. He took a step closer. “So, who do you want to properly greet now?”

“Hmmm,” Felicity hummed. “Let me see.”

She closed the distance towards Oliver by taking a step forward. With a smile and another little hum, Felicity put her arms around his neck. Oliver leaned down at the same time. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he pulled her closed against his chest and met her lips in a kiss. It was a gentle and playful kiss, very respectful of the viewer they had. He was angling her back a little, swaying her from one side to the other.

“Really, guys, you know how much I love you and how happy I am for you, but boundaries.”

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed him, just parting his lips from Felicity enough to get the sound out. “I am kissing my wife here.”

Oliver started kissing Felicity once more. She was tempted to lose every tension in her body and let Oliver kiss her senseless. She knew from own experience how weird it was when two people around her were intimate with each other, whether that was just in words or in kisses. She remembered very well how weird it had been to have Sara and Oliver being together in the lair a few years back. The lair had basically been their home. Their bed had been there, and they had spent most of their time together there. Seeing them interact in the foundry had always felt weird to her because of that. Admittedly, her feelings for Oliver hadn’t been any help either, but even without that it would have been weird.

“I think we need to stop,” Felicity whispered between two kisses. “We don’t want to scare Tommy off.”

Oliver grumbled deep in his chest. “I don’t want to stop.”

“We will continue this later,” Felicity whispered. “When nobody is watching.”

“Too much information,” Tommy groaned.

Oliver grumbled once more. “Only because he’s disturbing my concentration on enjoying this.”

“Of course,” Felicity whispered. When he straightened back up, taking her with him, Felicity put her hands to his cheeks and patted them lightly. “We will continue this later.”

Without any hesitance, Oliver turned around to Tommy. “How long do you want to stay?”

Felicity slapped his chest, stepping to Tommy instead to hug him. “Don’t listen to him. You are always welcome here.”

Tommy chuckled and hugged her back. “I know that.”

Felicity smiled. Tommy was still trying to find his place in a somewhat normal life. Spending time with his little sister and her family as well as his best friend and his family was certainly helping. Working on opening a club with Roy was helping, too. Still, he had trouble finding his place in life in general as well as with his new family that had used to be just friends and Laurel, who Felicity was sure he still loved but wasn’t sure how to deal with. A lot had happened during his time away. Felicity knew how out of place Oliver had felt after returning from the island, so she had a slight idea of how Tommy had to feel. Hence, she wanted her home to be a home for him too. He used to be Oliver’s best friend, and he was the name giver for one of her kids too. He was family to her.

“Okay, that’s enough with the hugging,” Oliver said teasingly. He pulled Felicity out of Tommy’s arms and back against him until her back was resting against his chest. Putting an arm around her from behind to keep her from moving away from him, he thrust a glass of wine he had poured her while she had been hugging Tommy. He turned to his friend then. “You wanted to suggest some plans before Felicity came home.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows, looking at Tommy interestedly. She leaned back against Oliver’s chest, smiling when she felt his arm around her tightening, and took a sip from her wine.

“Shoot.”

“Well, I though since you and Lyla want to take the kids to the trampoline hall on Saturday, that would give William and the two of us the chance to maybe do something else,” Tommy suggested. He shrugged his shoulders. “There is a climbing hall-“

“No.”

At Felicity’s firm interruption, both Tommy and Oliver looked at her with a frown.

“I actually think this is a good idea,” Oliver said.

Felicity snorted. “Of course you think so. Climbing into unimaginable heights and risking breaking your neck for some fun is what you love.”

“Did I ever tell you that Thea broke two of her vortexes on a trampoline when she was eight? She tried a somersault and got down the wrong way. She had to wear a medical corset for like five weeks to make it heal, and she would have needed surgery if it hadn’t become better.”

“Well, since the kids won’t do any somersaults, I don’t see a problem there,” Felicity said. “Climbing is a completely different level.”

Oliver pursed his lips and looked at her for a moment longer before he turned to Tommy. “It sounds great. We are going climbing.”

“I am not going to take care of you when you break your neck.”

“I know you won’t. You won’t have to, though.” Oliver brushed his lips against her ear. “Just take care of my grave.”

Felicity looked at him with a frown and slapped his chest gently. “That’s not funny.”

“You know, if I didn’t know that Ollie was madly in love with you, it might look like you are… quite hard on him.”

Oliver nodded. “More bruises from her than from Deathstroke.”

Tommy frowned. “Deathstroke?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Oliver said quickly and shrugged it off. “Anyway, going to the climbing hall sounds like a lot of fun.”

“To a climbing hall?”

All three adults turned around to see Tommy coming in. He stepped in front of Felicity and quietly reached out his arms for her. Smiling, Felicity put her glass away and lifted her little boy into her arms. She kissed his cheek. He had to be tired if his quiet reaction to figuring that his mommy was home already was any indication. As a little mama’s boy, he loved having her back home after work.

“Did Emmy stop reading you stories?” Felicity asked him.

Tommy shook his head. “I am thirsty.”

“That is something we can help with,” Oliver assured. He grabbed Tommy’s glass from the kitchen counter and poured him some water. “Here you go, Buddy.”

Tommy took a few sips before he handed the glass back to Oliver. After a short moment of silence, he asked, “Who goes to the climbing hall?”

“Daddy, Uncle Tommy and William,” Felicity replied.

Tommy nodded shortly. “Can I go too?”

“Do you want to come with us?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows. “It’s the same day that mommy and Aunt Lyla wanted to take you to the trampoline hall.”

Tommy looked at his mother. “Can I go?”

Felicity looked first at Oliver and then at Tommy. Both of them nodded.

“The hall has smaller climbing walls and idea to start climbing with kids,” Tommy explained. “I checked on that. I can do that with Tommy, so you and William can enjoy some time together.”

Oliver smiled at his son. “Would you like that? Spending the day with daddy, Uncle Tommy and William? And Uncle Tommy showing you how to climb?”

Tommy looked at his mother as if to make sure that he should really do that. Only when Felicity nodded with an encouraging smile, Tommy nodded, and a wide smile spread on his lips. Felicity kissed his cheek once more. If there was one thing Tommy’s wish to spend the day in the climbing hall instead of with his mommy and the trampolines, it was that Uncle Tommy really was part of the family for him, and a deeply loved part, too. Felicity doubted her little boy would spend the day with his daddy and brother. She was his favorite person in the world after all. She felt like Uncle Tommy could eventually become a concurrent, though.

 

 

“So, how do you like climbing, Buddy?” Tommy asked the little boy he shared a name with. “Do you like it?”

“It’s fun.”

Tommy smiled and lifted his hands a little bit more to be sure he would catch Tommy if he fell. The lady who led the class for preschool kids had advised them to use the wall for kids to start with. That way he could get used to climbing and get some feeling for his body. Little Tommy wasn’t secured. He was only climbing in a height that would allow him to jump down without getting hurt. Since Felicity and Oliver had trusted Tommy with their kid’s life, he wasn’t taking any risks, though.

His heart clenched painfully in his chest at the thought. He had been welcomed into Oliver’s and Felicity’s family so easy as if nothing had ever happened. The truth was that it was anything but natural that they allowed him to spend time with him and with their kids. After everything he had done, thing he couldn’t even remember and just knew about because Oliver and Felicity had told him like the fact that he had choked Felicity, they still trusted him. They had to be really good people.

When Little Tommy slipped from the mounting where his foot had been and threatened to fall down to the pad, Tommy caught the little boy in his arm.

“You okay?” he asked quickly.

The four-year-old needed a moment before the shock of falling passed and he could laugh happily. “That was fun!”

“Yes?” Tommy asked and smiled. “Do you want to try again or-“

“Can we do the real wall?”

Tommy smiled, nodding to the main walls of the hall. “Let’s go and see where William and your dad are, okay?”

“Okay.”

When Tommy put his little namesake down, the boy grabbed his hand to make sure he wasn’t getting lost on his way to the rest of the family. Tommy knew from Felicity and Oliver that the young Queen boy wasn’t the easiest person to deal with. He didn’t trust easily, and he preferred to spend his time with his mommy. Even Oliver had trouble putting him to bed sometimes because Tommy refused to sleep until he knew his mommy was coming home. It had gotten better over the years, and he did accept Raisa, but Little Tommy would never be the kind of kid you could just leave with a nanny or something without trouble.

“Daddy!”

At his son’s shout for him, Oliver looked down from where he was dangling right under the ceiling. He was securing himself, just like William did, who was climbing right next to his dad, but hadn’t reached the same height yet. Oliver quickly lowered himself to the floor.

“Hey, Buddy.”

Tommy waited until Oliver was standing on the floor before he let go of the little boy’s hand. He quickly ran over to his daddy, throwing himself at him to tell him everything he and Uncle Tommy had done. Uncle Tommy. It still felt so new.

“What do you say, Buddy?” Oliver asked. “Are you ready to climb a little higher?”

Immediately, Tommy nodded. “Yes!”

Oliver chuckled. “Emmy is going to envy you very much when you tell her what you did today.”

“I know.”

Again, Oliver chuckled and kissed his son’s cheek. “Now, let’s get you a belt, right? Daddy will secure you and-“

“I don’t want to go alone.” His eyes almost filled with fear as he was looking up the wall. Tommy’s hands tightened around his dad’s. “You go too please.”

Oliver puckered his lips. “But who’s going to secure you and-“

“I could do that,” Tommy offered easily, stepping closer. “I will take good care. I promise.”

“I don’t doubt that. I was just wondering if you didn’t want to use the time to climb a little yourself,” Oliver said. “You’ve spent the last two hours taking care of Tommy.”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “It was fun.”

“What’s going on here?” William asked when he got back to the floor too. “Any problem.”

“No, but your little brother wants to climb here now too,” Oliver replied. “Tommy suggests he secures him.”

“We can climb next to you if you feel safer than,” William suggested to Tommy.

Tommy nodded. “Yes, please.”

Oliver got Tommy a belt and made sure he was safely tugged into it. He and William took the place next to Tommy, asking him if he was ready before they started climbing.

With a smile on his lips, Tommy watched the three climbing together. He wondered what his life would be like now if he hadn’t been killed and lived in the shadows for an entire decade. Maybe he would have managed to be friends with Oliver despite everything that had happened between them before the Undertaking had happened. He may have been Oliver’s best man. He may have been the godfather to one of Oliver’s kids. He may have become a dad himself.

Tommy pushed that thought into a far corner of his heart. With the way things were, he didn’t feel fit to be a dad. He doubted he would ever be ready. He had a family, though. He had a sister. He had his best friend. He had a cute, little godson whose life he would have some influence on, and he had all of Ollie’s kids to experience what it was like to take care of kids and to be part of a family.

That really was all Tommy needed right now. He needed to know that he was welcomed somewhere and that there was a normal life out there for him. This boys’ day was certainly one of the best days he had had ever. He had never felt better than he did right now, knowing he was included into this family. It was the first time that he felt he really had a family.


	290. That special week in March

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, Guys! Since this is my three years writing anniversary, it’s also Time for a story’s third birthday. It called for an update, so here it is. I didn’t get to the 300th chapter yet (like I usually time the 50s and 100s), but I guess you’d appreciate the update nonetheless.

“You do know that the only reason you get away with this is because it’s _that_ week, right?”

Felicity smiled and rubbed her cheek against Oliver’s chest. She could hear Oliver’s heartbeat – strong and steady – right under her ear. Her heart had adapted to the rhythm only a couple of moments after she had lain down on top of him. Her entire body was embraced in the scent of his warm skin, allowing her to blank out everything that wasn’t them in this moment. His fingertips traced her spine under the shirt she wore. Goosebumps followed where he touched her. She felt safe and content lying here like this, so she wasn’t surprised that Oliver didn’t want to give up the privilege of lying on top of her to listen to her heartbeat.

Since they had gotten together, they had slept in the reserved position – Felicity lying in bed with Oliver resting on top of her. At the start of their relationship when Oliver’s PTSD had been a lot more present, he had had trouble finding sleep while she had been sleeping. For a while, he had only allowed himself to fall asleep when she had been awake. After a particularly exhausting day and some long lovemaking, Felicity had fallen asleep. When she had woken up later that night, Oliver had lain on top of her like that, sleeping as calmly as he had been able to sleep back then. Since that night, they had only stopped sleeping like that when she had been pregnant or sick, and it had been impossible for him to lie on her.

“When you say ‘ _that_ week’, I guess you mean the three days from March 24 to 26?”

“If you want to complain about my choice of words,” Oliver said and tickled her sides teasingly, “I might turn us around again.”

Felicity tightened her arms around his chest, pressing herself impossibly close to him. She knew it wouldn’t stop him from turning them if he wanted to, but there was nothing that could stop him in that case. Her big, bad vigilante had no problems showing his strength in the bedroom, no matter in what circumstances.

“I am not complaining,” she said quickly, trying to sound as innocent as possible. She was so comfortable lying here like this, she didn’t want anything to change. “I am just asking if you mean these three days.”

“What else would I mean?” Oliver asked and kissed the crown of her head. His fingertips traced the line of her spine once more before his arms wrapped around her chest tightly, holding Felicity close against his chest. “You gave me Addie last year on March 24. You made me the happiest man on the face of the earth eight years ago on March 25. You gave me Millie on March 26 two years ago.”

Felicity smiled. “With Connor’s first birthday tomorrow, it’s going to be a busy week.”

“Mhm,” Oliver hummed in agreement. He stayed quiet for a while. “Can you believe our babies are already turning a year older?”

“No.” Felicity kissed Oliver’s chest before she pulled one arm away from under it. She rested her hand on his heart und put her chin on top of it to look at Oliver, who was already smiling at her. “It’s still like yesterday that the elevator got stuck, and Millie was born. Addie’s birth feels like it was only this morning.”

Oliver nodded. “It’s terrifying how quickly time passes.”

“It is.” Felicity kissed his chest once more. “In twenty or twenty-five years, it will only be the two of us and Raisa in this house.”

Oliver grinned. “We should both retire until then, so we can have sex everywhere.”

“If your back can take that.” Felicity chuckled. “You are going to be an old man.”

“What?” Oliver asked, and amused smile on his lips. “How dare you?”

“Oh, I am sorry. You already are an old man.”

Felicity grinned at Oliver, and he puckered his lips. His fingertips moved against her ribcage like he wanted to show her how easily he could tickle her without actually tickling her. Felicity guessed she wasn’t being tickled in that week in March.

“This house without the kids will feel empty,” Oliver said eventually. He sighed. “I know things at home are always busy, just as busy as the rest of our life is, but I like it that way. At the mansion it was quiet most of the time, and, when it was busy, it was because my parents had guests which means Thea and I didn’t have much fun. We were also so many years apart that it took us some time before we could build the kind of relationship that we have today. A fifteen years old boy doesn’t know what to do with a five-year-old.”

“William handles his younger siblings incredibly.”

“True,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “He wasn’t born into a rich family that gave him everything money could buy, though.”

“Well…”

Oliver rolled his eyes. “Okay, he only met us – the rich family that _could_ give him everything money could buy – later, and we are not buying him everything he wants.”

“True.” Felicity smiled. “Neither of us had the kind of childhood we are trying to give to our children. Our parents were always working, even if for different reasons, and we’ve been alone a lot. I am glad our kids have each other to lean on.”

“Yeah.” Oliver kissed her forehead. “And, despite my usual dislike of sharing my family or spending time with too many people together, I am really looking forward to the three birthday parties.”

“So am I, and I am really happy that we decided to have a party for Addie and one for Millie instead of making them share.”

“It’s only fair that they don’t have to share,” Oliver said. “Emmy, Tommy and William don’t have to share their parties, either. Besides, we all did agree that we needed more family gatherings, so it felt like the right thing to do.”

“Even if our week is going to explode with all the parties.”

“Week?” Oliver asked. “You mean the days from March 24 to March 26?”

Felicity rolled her eyes before she chuckled. She propped herself up onto her hands and lifted herself far enough, so she could kiss Oliver goodnight. When she snuggled back to his chest, finding the best position to sleep in, Oliver switched off the light.

“Felicity?” he asked after a few minutes.”

“Hm?”

“We will switch back to our usual positions tomorrow, right?”

 

 

“Everything alright?”

Felicity frowned when she noticed the way Lyla was looking around the living room like she was searching for something. She looked around too, trying to find what was bothering her friend, but she couldn’t say what it could be. Everyone was here to celebrate Connor’s firth birthday. Thea and Tommy were playing with the three youngest members of the Arrow Family on the floor. Laurel, William and Roy were chatting at the window, watching Sara, Emmy and Tommy playing in the garden. Everyone else – their friends from Central City as well as Lyla’s and John’s families – were there too.

“Where’s Johnny?”

“He and Oliver withdrew from the party. They need to talk.”

Lyla frowned. “Is something wrong with them?”

“No,” Felicity replied quickly. “No, no. It’s all fine. Oliver actually has an offer for John that I think he’d like to tell him about in a quiet moment. It’s… quite the offer.”

“I hope it’s a little less dangerous or time-consuming than the last offer he made him,” Lyla replied with a smile. She took a sip from her wine. “No, I am happy Johnny has the team. He loves the adrenaline kick. I should understand that.”

“But you don’t?” Felicity asked.

Lyla sighed, thinking about her answer for a moment. Eventually, she took another sip of her wine and put the glass onto the couch table. She shrugged her shoulders.

“I am basically doing the same, so it would be hypocritical to say that I don’t understand why he does it. It’s just that, whenever I look at Sara or Connor, I am worried what would happen to them if something happened to Johnny and me. I know you are in a similar situation, just like Thea and Roy, but-“

“We are all troubling with that question,” Felicity said, nodding slowly. “For Oliver and me, it’s a little bit easier because I am just behind the computers. I don’t go out in the field and risk my life, but of course Oliver and I discussed the danger we are putting ourselves in, too. We wondered if it is worth it.”

“And what did you decide?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Someone has to take care of the city. If we aren’t doing it, who else will?”

Lyla sighed, nodding her head as she looked at Connor. After a moment, she chuckled and looked at Felicity.

“You know, one of my agents was killed last week. His wife died of cancer two years ago. He leaves two children,” Lyla said. “His sister is taking the kids now, but she did struggle with the decision. These things make you wonder what happens to your children when something happens to you. I know my sister can’t take Sara and Connor. She’s traveling too much, and she loves her job. I wouldn’t want her to give that up.”

Felicity laced her fingers with Lyla’s and squeezed her hand. “You know that Oliver and I are always here for you and your family. I hope we will never get in that situation, but, just in case, I want you to know that everything is going to be okay. Oliver and I already have five kids. We can handle two more. Sara and Connor are not going to end up on the street.”

Lyla smiled. “Thank you.”

“Not for that.”

Felicity turned her head to look at her kids. She knew the trouble Lyla was going through. With the lives they lived, those thoughts were always coming back from time to time. When Emmy had still been a baby, they had asked Thea to take the little girl if something happened to them. With Thea being a mother herself now and the three kids Oliver and Felicity added to the mix, they should probably discuss if she still wanted to take the responsibility. Felicity didn’t want to think about that too much, though. Besides, she knew her mother and Quentin as well as Laurel and Tommy would all help no matter what would happen, her kids wouldn’t be alone.

“So, what offer does Oliver have for Johnny?”

Felicity felt she should be happy about the change of subject. She was still shaking off the bad feeling of knowing her kids or Lyla’s kids or little Robbie could end up as orphans that it took her a moment to answer.

“Oliver wants him to take the position as deputy mayor,” Felicity said.

Lyla perked up her eyebrows. “Really?”

“Yes. He struggled deciding between Quentin and John because they would both be great in that position. He decided to ask John first, though.”

“I think he would like that.” Lyla said. “Our men leading the city.”

“Don’t they do so already?” Felicity asked with a chuckle.

“Kind of, but now it’s going to be official.”

Felicity smiled. When Lyla was already so positive towards the idea of John becoming deputy mayor, despite the time it would take from their family, she was sure John would agree to it, too. It would definitely take away one of problems that had caused him quite a headache lately. Felicity was sure these two would make a great duo in the leading positions of the city.

 

 

“Dada!”

“Yes, it’s daddy!”

Oliver chuckled when he stepped closer to the crib where Addie was already standing with her hands safely wrapped around the bars to make sure she wouldn’t fall. His little girl smiled happily and moved her butt back and forth like she wanted to dance because of joy that finally someone was paying attention to her. Since she had only been awake for a minute, Oliver knew it was just his youngest daughter showing that even with one year of age she would not give up on being the little wildflower in the family just yet.

When Oliver stepped in front of the crib, he just reached out his hands, trying to get Addie to put her smaller ones into his. She wiggled her butt once more, but she refused to let go of the bars.

“Come on,” Oliver prompted her. “Try it. Just let go and put your hand into daddy’s.”

Addie looked at his hands, wiggling with her butt once more. Instead of letting go with even just one hand, she released a dissatisfied cry, though. Oliver chuckled. Addie loved walking on someone’s hands but standing and walking didn’t work for her when she was on her own yet. Addie cried out once more.

Oliver chuckled and lifted her out of her crib, kissing her cheek. “Hi, Birthday Girl. How are you?”

“Pink.”

“Pink?” Oliver asked. He puckered his lips. “And what is it like to feel pink?”

“Pink.”

Oliver smiled and hugged Addie to his chest closely, kissing her light blonde hair. Addie sighed and rested her head against his shoulders, revealing how tired she was. Oliver swayed from side to side slowly, rocking Addie in his arms soothingly.

Felicity had already left the house for an early telephone conference. Her mornings would be filled with appointments all week. Some problem had occurred with the new project she and Bruce would start in a couple of days, so she had no choice but to work at least some hours each day. They didn’t have any plans for the morning anyway, so Oliver didn’t mind. At least that meant that she would be back home for lunch, and they had all the time in the world to take care of the last preparations for Addie’s birthday party this afternoon.

Oliver shot a brief look at his watch and sighed. Unfortunately, Felicity wasn’t the only one who had to spend their baby’s birthday morning with work.

“Do you want to help daddy picking a good outfit?” Oliver asked Addie. “You know daddy has to meet with some important people from Hub City. Do you want to help daddy?”

Addie nodded and pointed at something in her crib. Oliver turned around to see the donkey her siblings had picked for her during their vacation in Bali. Oliver smiled and handed it to her. Immediately, Addie hugged it to her chest closely and snuggled back to Oliver’s chest.

Oliver carried Addie to his bedroom. He sat her down on the floor there and continued his way to the clothing room. Instead of waiting for him, Addie just followed her daddy. She crawled right after him.

“Pink. Pink. Pink.”

Oliver chuckled. “Yeah, you want something pink. Daddy gets that. Let daddy see.”

Humming, Oliver looked through his ties. He was still starting his wardrobe. He had had some ties when he had decided to run for mayor, leftovers of his time as CEO of Queen Consolidated. He had started raising the numbers of ties he had. He didn’t have many pink ones, though. He should probably change that.

Eventually, Oliver took a tie with white, turquoise and pink stripes as well as a simple pink one. He showed Addie both of them, and she took them in thoroughly.

“Pink.”

Oliver chuckled, crouching down in front of Addie and showing her both ties more closely.

“Pink.”

“They are both pink, Sweetheart.” Oliver smiled at her. “So which one.”

“Pink,” Addie said and pointed at the simple pink one. “Pink.”

Oliver smiled and kissed her head. “Alright. I am going to wear this one then. Thanks for your help.”

 

 

“How long do you think we can do this?”

Oliver smiled down at her, making Felicity’s heartbeat quicken and a flutter spreading in the pit of her stomach. If the warming fire and the feeling of being well protected and safe didn’t get her to smile, her husband’s smile certainly did. His smile had always made her smile. Knowing that after everything he had been through, he was able to smile and had that one smile that seemed to be only for her, filled her heart with joy.

“You mean looking at each other like this?”

Oliver hummed in agreement, making Felicity’s smile widen. She reached out her hand and stroked her fingertips through his short stubble. When her thumb moved over his bottom lip, Oliver kissed it.

After they had put the kids to bed, they had made themselves comfortable on the couch. Enjoying a good glass of wine, they had chatted and started snuggling eventually. Now Oliver was sitting on the couch, his legs stretched out with his feet resting on the table. He held Felicity in his arms, the way you held a newborn. His left arm was pushed under her head. His right hand was stroking up and down her naked thigh. She was only wearing one of his hoodies and panties, but no bra, socks or pants.

For the last ten minutes, they had just looked at each other. Neither of them had spoken. Neither of them had done anything but to look into each other’s eyes. Felicity could get lost in the deep blue of his iris.

“Forever,” Felicity whispered. “We can do this forever.”

“Forever sounds great.”

Felicity smiled. “Yes, it does.”

Today, she and Oliver were married for eight years, together for nine. Next year this time they would have spent a decade as a couple. Felicity knew it was by far her longest relationship, and she knew it was the same for Oliver. Their longest relationships had lasted a little over a year. They had needed to find each other to see how well they worked in a relationship.

“Do you regret it sometimes?”

“What?” Felicity asked with a frown. “Getting married?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “That it all happened so soon, I guess. We’ve been together for only a couple of weeks when I proposed. We got married one year into our relationship and had Emmy one year later. The city needed much more saving back then. We spent most of our time together in the Arrow Cave instead of together like this. We had little to no time to spend together as a couple, you know, to explore who we are without a wedding band or without kids. Did you ever regret that?”

Felicity thought about her answer thoroughly. She knew Oliver didn’t ask because he regretted getting married or he regretted starting a family. He just wanted to know her perspective. They had a kind of marriage that was build on so much trust that Felicity knew she could answer honestly, and it wouldn’t change anything between them. They knew they loved each other, and that was all that mattered.

“Maybe when I was depressive during the pregnancy with Tommy,” Felicity replied. “I didn’t know where my feelings were coming from, so I assumed it had to be something about you. Since I was depressive, I doubt it was an honest feeling because wanna know something?”

Oliver smiled. “Everything.”

“I think the place where we see who we really are, individually and together, the most clearly is in the Arrow Cave. We are working together there under extreme circumstances. What I learned there is that I can lean on you completely and that you can lean on me. I know you keep a clear head when things get tough. You don’t freak out. You don’t get more aggressive than the situation calls for. I know who you are when you are out there, and that tells me everything I need to know about you.”

Oliver leaned down and kissed her lips gently. A content smile spread on his lips when he leaned back.

“I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”

Felicity smiled back, resting her head against his cheek. “I love you, too.”

Oliver shot a brief look at his watch. “I think it’s time for me to take you to bed now.”

Felicity grinned widely. “That is absolutely right.”

 

 

When Felicity pushed at Oliver’s shoulder, he groaned. His arms tightened around her body, and he pushed his nose against the top of her chest. Felicity smiled, stroking her fingers through his short hair tenderly. After three rounds of heavenly lovemaking, Oliver was sleeping as peacefully as she had ever seen him.

“I’ll be back soon.”

Oliver groaned once more. “Where do you want to go?”

“Just downstairs to grab a bottle of water,” Felicity whispered. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

“I’m counting the seconds.”

He kissed the top of her breast before he rolled off her to give her free. Felicity smiled and kissed his cheek before she slid to the edge of the bed and got up. She quickly walked downstairs and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. She took a few gulps, already back on her way upstairs.

She was just halfway down the hallway to their bedroom when she heard a low humming coming from Millie’s nursery. Frowning, Felicity closed the bottle and walked a few steps backwards until she was right in front of Millie’s door. When the humming grew louder, Felicity guessed it was proving that it was coming from the nursery. Felicity figured they must have forgotten the baby phone downstairs when Oliver had carried her to bed.

“Hey, Sweetie,” Felicity said when she entered her daughter’s room. “Are you awake?”

“Yes.”

As Felicity stepped closer, Millie sat up in bed and finally got up onto her feet, reaching out her hands. Felicity smiled and lifted her daughter out of the crib. She kissed her lips gently.

“Do you know what day it is?”

“My birthday,” Millie said, smiling shyly.

“Exactly.” Felicity smiled and kissed the tip of Millie’s nose. “Happy birthday, Sweetie.”

“I get presents now?”

“No, not yet,” Felicity said. “You will get presents this afternoon when all our friends and family are here.”

“Like for Addie?”

“Yes, exactly like it was for Addie.”

Millie smiled. “I have to sleep?”

“I think so, yes,” Felicity agreed and nodded her head. “Do you want to sleep in mommy’s and daddy’s bed for the rest of the night?”

Millie’s smile widened, and she nodded excitedly. “Yes.”

“Then let’s go. We gotta be quiet, though. Daddy is still sleeping.”

Felicity carried Millie to their bedroom. She put the bottle of water to her nightstand and set Millie down on the bed. She crawled to her daddy immediately and snuggled up to him. Oliver was sleepy, but he wrapped his arm around Millie nonetheless, rolling onto his side and pulling Millie against his chest. He kissed her temple.

Smiling, Felicity watched the two of them. After only a moment, she crawled into bed with her husband and daughter. She snuggled to Millie’s front, kissed her daughter’s forehead and rested her chin against the top of her head, so her nose was bumping against Oliver’s.

“Felicity?”

“Hm?”

“That have been eighty-four seconds.”


	291. Spoiling

“When exactly will you tell me where we are going?”

Oliver chuckled about her impatience. Felicity usually liked surprises, or at least she did so if she wasn’t the one to be surprised. Knowing that he had a surprise for her and not knowing what it was just didn’t suit her nature. Since he had asked her to go out with him, she had been asking again and again where exactly they were going. She had tried everything, ranging from being all cute over promising sexual favors up to emotionally blackmailing him, to get him to tell her where they were going. Oliver had withstood all her techniques, firmly standing his ground and not telling her.

By now, they had left the car in the underground parking and were strolling through the shopping street. He was almost a little bit amused that Felicity didn’t know where they were going yet. She knew how well he knew her after all. Given the almost endless possibilities, he guessed that it was a lot more obvious to him than it was to her, though.

“We are going to be there soon.”

Felicity puckered her lips and looked at the stores that were coming next with narrowed eyes, trying to imagine his plan. Felicity knew him better than anyone, so maybe she would be able to anticipate where they were going. If the expression on her face was any indication, she didn’t know where they were going, though.

“Are we going to that new lingerie store?”

Oliver frowned. “There is a new lingerie store?”

“Yes.” Felicity nodded to one of the stores where balloons and other decorations were announcing the opening of a new lingerie store. “They sell designer lingerie, very sexy and absolutely not cheap. Your sister told me that she’s been there to-”

“No details please.”

Felicity smiled. “Anyway, it seems to be a great store. We might go there together one day soon. Maybe we ask Lyla to come with us too.”

“Hm.”

“So, it’s not where we are going today?”

“Nope,” Oliver replied. He kissed Felicity temple. “If I had known there was a new lingerie store and I had wanted to make myself a gift, I would have taken you there.”

“But you didn’t know.”

“And I don’t want to make myself a gift,” Oliver added. He squeezed Felicity’s hand. “Today, it’s all about spoiling you.”

Felicity leaned her head against Oliver’s shoulder and smiled at him. Her free hand came to grab his bicep, and she rubbed it up and down in silent gratefulness. Oliver brushed his lips against her forehead and smiled.

He loved spoiling Felicity, always had. He loved buying her things and doing things for her. When she came back home from work, the first thing he would always do is making sure she was comfortable and could have five minutes of rest to come down. Some days he would run her a bath, other days he would massage her feet. Some days, like today, he would take her out to spoil her even more.

Oliver guessed it was his own experience in childhood in connection with knowing what Felicity has been going through as a child that made him love spoiling her so much. As a kid, he had always gotten everything that he had wanted. It hadn’t always been for his best, but he certainly had never lacked anything. For Felicity, it had been different. She and Donna had lived on the limit of what they could afford, so there hadn’t been much time or money for Felicity to be spoilt. Oliver would do everything in his power to make up for that now.

“So, why today?” Felicity asked eventually.

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Huh?”

“Why do you want to spoil me today?”

“Just because I love you,” Oliver replied and kissed her temple. “What other reason does a man need to spoil his wife?”

“That is sweet.”

“I am sweet.”

Felicity chuckled. “Yes, you are.”

Oliver’s heart made a little jump at her words. It was weird, but these little words of affection still got him every time. He and Felicity had spent nine years as a couple now, and still it amazed him anytime Felicity made him know how much she loved him. He had no idea what he had done to deserve her.

“If you think so already,” Oliver said and stopped walking, pulling Felicity in front of him, “I am excited to figure out what you think about my little idea of spoiling you.”

Felicity puckered her lips and perked up her eyebrows. The excitement to finally have the secret revealed was written all over her face. It actually reminded him a little bit of the way Millie had looked at the sight of the Christmas tree last December. With a smile, Oliver kissed the tip of Felicity’s nose and turned her around on her shoulders, so she could see where he had taken her.

“That is Tech Village.” Felicity frowned. “Why are we at Tech Village?”

Oliver smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, kissing her cheek. “We are at Tech Village because they got a shipment of the newest computer and tablet models as well as a lot of new hardware to make tech more fun.”

Felicity released a little sound, a mixture of a dreamy sigh and desperate whine. He could see the desire in her eyes. Everything about tech usually made her eyes fill with desire and her heart starting to long. For some reason, she was holding back on her feelings. Instead of running right into the store and exploring everything that they had to offer, Felicity leaned back against his chest with a sigh.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Not in the mood?”

“No, it’s not that.” Felicity sighed once more, snuggling her cheek against his bicep. “It’s just that I have really great tech at the company and in the bunker.”

“But the one at home is growing old.”

“Growing old would be too much,” Felicity said. “It’s not the newest things, but it’s not even really outdated. It would be completely over the top to get something new.”

Oliver puckered his lips. For weeks, she had mentioned the new tech now. She had told him about all the increased details. Oliver hadn’t understood much of it, but he had heard Felicity’s desire for something new sounding through. He understood where her hesitation was coming from. For someone who had had to fight for everything in her childhood, it had to feel like being wasteful to buy new tech equipment when the old one was still working and, in Felicity’s words, not even outdated.

“How would you like a deal?”

Felicity angled her head back, perking up her eyebrows. “A deal?”

“Yes, a deal.” Oliver smiled and tightened his arms around her. “We go in there now, and you buy whatever you want to have – for our home, for the bunker and for QI. Then we go home, and for every piece you bought, we are going to give away something else. If you buy a new tablet, we will give the old one away and so on.”

“And where do we give it to?”

Oliver didn’t have to think about that for long. “I’d suggest schools in the Glades. They aren’t equipped well enough, and, unlike schools in most other neighborhoods, you cannot count on the parents to buy their kids devices to bring to school and compensate a lack of equipment.”

Felicity turned around to him. “That’s a really cool idea.”

“I just think it makes sense,” Oliver replied, cupping her cheeks with his hands. “I know you feel bad spending money on something you don’t necessarily need, but I want you to have all the things you want in life. This way, you can have something new and do something good for children, too.”

“We should think about donating some more tech to help them,” Felicity said. “I mean more than we will donate with this.”

“Sounds good.” Oliver nodded to the store. “And now go in there, and I will buy you everything you want.”

Felicity squealed happily, straightening up onto the tip of her toes and kissing his lips firmly. She turned around and almost ran into the store, tugging him with her at his hand. While Felicity was exploring everything the store had to offer, Oliver sat down on a chair in a corner and just watched her. Joy spread in his heart as he watched her, so maybe he wasn’t only spoiling her after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PREPARE FOR A GIANT UPDATE AT THE END OF THE WEEK. IT’S BASICALLY LIKE A SEQUEL TO CHAPTER 224 (“VERTIGO”). HENCE, IT INCLUDES HALLUCINATIONS. THERE IS ALSO SOME OLD-STYLE-WRITING WITH STORIES BEING TOLD.


	292. Vertigo II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like announced before, this chapter will include old writing style of stories being told. As a sequel to Vertigo, it will also include a hallucination. Hence, this chapter is another little monster like a small multi-chapter. Enjoy!
> 
> By the way, this chapter includes some smut.

“Okay, I was finally able to pull a shot from the public surveillance that will work to run facial recognition on him.”

“I guess our guy wasn’t as smart he made himself out to be after all?”

“Smart, but not smarter than me.”

“Well, because that would be impossible.”

“Aw, you’re complimenting me. That’s sweet.” Shooting a glance at the monitor that tracked their subject’s movements, Felicity got serious again. “Guy is heading towards South Boulevard. If he’s continuing down that street, he is going to scorch right into the Streetdance Festival there. With the thousands of guests, I’d say that’s quite dangerous. The day would end with dozens dead and even more injured.”

“Any plan on how we can prevent that from happening?”

“Working on it.” Felicity let her fingers dance over the keyboard, looking back and forth between the progress of the facial recognition and the team chasing the subject. “Okay, I got something. There is a dead-end street not far. Spartan, Black Canary, you cut the subject’s way, Spartan over Sixth, Black Canary over Rogers Street. Green Arrow, take Jackson Street and Ivy Court, then Hillside Drive back. That’s the other end of the dead-end street. With a little athletics, you can climb over the wall and wait for the guy.”

“Roger,” all three of them said at the same time.

Felicity watched on the monitor how the three dots – green for Oliver, black for John and yellow for Laurel – part ways. Thanks to roadworks and a road constriction as well as the big van the criminal was driving, he was only getting forward slowly. It gave Green Arrow, Spartan and Black Canary the chance to get into position.

When her computer beeped, Felicity turned her eyes to the other monitor.

“Facial recognition was successful,” she said. “Our subject is Henrick Nilsen, and he has more priors than I could tell you about in a lifetime. A lot surrounding drugs and some batteries. Nothing that got him more than a few years, and according to prison records, he’s always been released early for good behavior. I guess Iron Heights needed too many cells for our later subjects to keep anyone too long. I’ll try finding out what he’s working on now.”

“He’s rumored to be the next Count Vertigo,” Laurel said. “We had some finks tell us, but we haven’t been able to get a hand on Nilsen so far. We searched his home and an apartment he rented as offices, but there was nothing that could have helped us with the case. I guess with the experiences of the last Counts Vertigos, Nielsen knows how to stay undiscovered.”

Felicity suppressed a sigh. It seemed like Vertigo was never going to die out. For the past ten years, there had always been someone to take up the mantle of the first Count Vertigo, finding new ways to create a destructive drug. Felicity remembered all too well how Oliver had been hit with a new version of Vertigo two years ago when she had been pregnant with Addie. He had dreamed about another life there, a life that had never taken him to the island and that had never taken his parents from him and yet he had been able to find her and build a life with her. Only had they been unable to have babies which had created a lot of trouble between them and especially for her as he had told her. Felicity had really had too many encounters with Vertigo and its inventors. She didn’t even want to think about the first encounter when the original Count Vertigo had kept her captive at QC, tugging at her ponytail, until Oliver had shot him with three arrows into his chest if she remembered correctly.

“Well, then I’d say tonight might be the night,” Felicity said, glad if they could take out the guy before the new version of Vertigo could hit the market. “Nilsen is crossing Sixth in four, three, two-“

“Already there,” John replied.

Felicity watched John cutting Nilsen’s way and forcing him into Amherst Street. He chased right after him.

“Black Canary, Nilsen is fifty feet away from Rogers Street.”

Again, Felicity watched the grey dot turning his way and heading right into the dead-end street where Green Arrow was already waiting. This was going to be a cakewalk even if Oliver would have to face Nilsen alone. Still, it never hurt to have more hands at deck – for example in case when a second emergency was coming in Felicity added to her thoughts when her computer beeped and informed about a bank robbery in Pennytown.

“Bank robbery in Pennytown,” Felicity informed the three. “There is only one suspect, and no shots have been fired, but maybe you should take a look.”

“You can both head out,” Oliver explained. “I can handle this.”

“Are you sure?” John asked.

Oliver chuckled. “You forgot that I have been doing this mostly alone for quite some time.”

“True,” John admitted. “Black Canary, we are heading out.”

“Bank is on corner Orchard Avenue and Union Street,” Felicity told them. “I will update you once I know anything more. Police is currently taking up position around the building.”

“Roger.”

Felicity watched the black and the yellow dot head into the opposite direction, while the grey dot was coming closer to where Green Arrow was waiting. Felicity switched off John’s and Laurel’s coms, so she could focus on Oliver and helping him to finish his mission. At the same time, she kept an eye on what the other two were doing and working on trying to get some new info on the bank robbery.

“Nilsen should be in sight now,” Felicity said.

“He is.”

Felicity hacked into the surveillance camera that filmed the dead-end street. She was already sure that the camera would have been sabotaged by local gangs when she actually got the video. She suppressed a sigh of relief. She couldn’t deny that, though she knew Oliver could handle these things, she liked to have a close eye on whatever the team was doing.

She watched Nilsen slowing down the car and getting out of it. He lost no time attacking Green Arrow, and he proved to be quite well-trained. It actually made Felicity wonder if there was something like a fight club for aspiring criminals. If there was, they really needed to hire a better teacher because it took Oliver barely a minute to take that guy down.

“Call Lance,” Oliver requested.

“Already done,” Felicity replied. “The police is on their way and- Everything alright?”

With worry, Felicity watched Oliver nutating a little. He panted slightly and leaned against Nilsen’s van.

“Just dizzy.” Oliver swallowed down hard. “I am just getting him tied up and come home to-“

“Oliver!”

Panic spread in Felicity when she all tension losing Oliver’s body. He fell onto the cold asphalt and stayed there without moving. Felicity quickly switched on the other comms again.

“Green Arrow needs help. He collapsed.”

“I’ll go back,” Laurel replied.

Immediately the yellow dot took a sharp turn back towards the dead-end street. Felicity focused on Oliver and Nilsen again. While Oliver was still lying on the floor without moving, Nilsen seemed to recover from the fight. He got up onto his feet and looked at Oliver for a moment. With held breath, Felicity prayed that he wasn’t going to hurt him. Luckily, he seemed to be satisfied with his unconsciousness, so he just stepped over him and got back into the van.

“Black Canary, Nilsen is about to flee in the van.”

“I just turned into Amherst Street,” Laurel said. “What about Green Arrow?”

“Still unconscious,” Felicity replied nervously. “Stop the motorcycle. Then stop that van with your most powerful Canary Cry. Police is not far away, so that should be sufficient, so you can take care of Green Arrow.”

“Alright.”

It only took a couple of moments for the Canary Cry to echo through the bunker. Felicity had installed a special muffler to Laurel’s communication piece, so her Canary Cry wouldn’t deafen everyone on the other lines. It also made it unnecessary to always cut the connections when Laurel was using her sonic scream.

“The van is stopped,” Laurel said. “Nilsen is unconscious. He has a bleeding on his forehead.”

“I’ll call an ambulance.”

“I’ll go ahead to Green Arrow.”

Felicity contacted the ambulance, informing them of a hurt criminal in connection with the current police action at Amherst Street. Meanwhile, Laurel arrived at Oliver’s side. She kneeled down next to him, turning his head to look at it.

“He’s unconscious,” Laurel confirmed what Felicity had suspected from the surveillance. “I can’t see any bleedings or anything that would- wait. He’s been injected with something. I’ve got the syringe. There is still a little bit of the serum in it. It’s not much, but it should be enough to test it and figure out what it is.”

“Good. Can you get him home?”

“Impossible,” Laurel replied. “He’s really heavy.”

“I’ll send you help.” Felicity quickly linked herself off the line and took her phone, quickly dialing a number she had remembered well by now.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Tommy,” she said hurriedly. “I need to ask for a favor.”

“Whatever you need.”

\----->

When Oliver stepped out of the elevator and saw the empty desk of his father’s assistant, he glanced at his watch. The drive back through the city had cost him a lot more time than he had thought it would. With all the roadworks, the drive had taken even longer than usually, and Oliver had been late anyway. He guessed Emily had already called it a day and headed home.

“Hi, sorry I’m la-”

As soon as Oliver saw that it wasn’t his father but Felicity sitting behind the desk, he stopped. For a brief second, he looked back over his shoulder, checking if he had accidentally taken the wrong door out of an old habit that was hard to trash. He was in his father’s office at Queen Consolidated, though, and it was Felicity sitting behind his father’s desk. She looked at him with the same surprise in her eyes. Her fingers were still hovering over the keyboard.

“Hey,” he said softly, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans and approaching her slowly. “What are you doing here?”

“The heater in my office doesn’t work,” Felicity replied with a smile. She lowered her hands and, after a moment of hesitation, pushed them under her butt to sit on them. “I’ve been wearing my coat most of the day, but that didn’t keep my fingers from growing stiff from coldness. I figured I could use your father’s business trip to steal his office for a while.”

“Business trip?”

“Yes, he needed to visit our subsidiary in Moscow.”

Oliver frowned. “When was that decided?”

“This morning,” Felicity explained, shrugging her shoulders. “There are some problems with a project, so he decided it was better if he paid them a visit to solve them. I offered to go, but he thought it was better if I stayed here and watched over the process of- You know what, it doesn’t matter.”

Felicity shrugged it off and lowered her eyes, biting down on her bottom lip. Oliver felt a sadness that had been part of him for more than a year now taking hold of his heart once more. He sucked in a deep breath against the tight feeling in his chest and put on a smile.

“I guess dinner is canceled then.”

“Oh, did you have a dinner engagement?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Mom and Thea are out of town, so we thought it could be fun.”

“Right, Thea texted me earlier today. They seem to have a lot of fun.”

“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed. “Thea always wanted to go to Corto Maltese, and I think it’s good for the two of them to do this together. Like you said, they have a lot of fun. Thea said they asked you to go with them.”

“Yes.” Felicity hesitated. “I just thought it wouldn’t be a good idea.”

“I wouldn’t have minded,” Oliver replied honestly. “You are still part of the family and-“

“Thea, Moira and Robert are your family,” Felicity interrupted him quickly. “I love them, and I certainly won’t stop with that or with seeing them, but they are your family. It’s better to separate that since we are divorced. Now it’s even official.”

 “Yeah, I received the letter this morning.” Oliver nodded slowly. “It really is official.”

There was a moment of silence. Oliver continued looking at Felicity though he felt the urge to lower his eyes. He and Felicity had been married for years, and, at times, it had really been perfect. Those days, he had never thought that they would end up divorced. Life hadn’t been easy on them, though, and, after some time, a divorce seemed to have been the best solution for both of them.

He and Felicity had tried to have a baby. They had more than tried actually. They had fought for it. Yet, it hadn’t gotten them anywhere. All doctor appointments or hormone therapies had fallen flat. When the specialist they had hired had told them that they should consider other options because another hormone therapy would be too much for Felicity to take, all the crushed hope had crashed down on them. Felicity had told him that she didn’t want any other options. If they couldn’t have a baby like that, they shouldn’t have one at all. Over months, she had said it again and again, and Oliver hadn’t been able to say anything to that because he hadn’t known what to say. Eventually, Felicity had told him that she didn’t want Oliver to live without a baby. She didn’t want to be the reason he didn’t have children. Again, Oliver hadn’t been able to say anything to that. Felicity had moved out of the mansion and failed for divorce, and, still, Oliver hadn’t been able to say anything. He and Felicity had fought for a baby so much that is had just left them exhausted. There had been no energy left to fight for their marriage.

“I know you didn’t really want the divorce,” Felicity whispered eventually, “but I hope that someday you can see that it was what’s best for both of us. I really don’t want you to hate me.”

Oliver lifted his gaze to look at Felicity. “I could never hate you.”

Quiet settled. Oliver couldn’t say what the expression on Felicity’s face was supposed to say. She looked relieved for sure, but, at the same time, she still looked tense.

“Hey, now you can finally really think about a family with someone new,” Felicity said. “Well, or maybe you already have thought about it. I wasn’t implying that you weren’t dating so far. We’ve been separated for a year now, and it’s absolutely okay to date. Not that you would need my consent anyway or-“

“How would you feel about grabbing dinner together?” Oliver asked, successfully stopping Felicity’s babble before it would get any more awkward.

“Dinner?”

“Yes.” Oliver grinned. “A meal in the evening, preferably accompanied by a good glass of wine and an inspiring conversation with someone you like.”

Felicity hesitated, fidgeting with her fingers nervously. “Are you sure?”

“Of course. Why not?”

“Maybe because we got divorced today?”

Oliver stepped forward slowly, and it was almost like Felicity was moving away from him. She leaned into the backrest of her chair, then moved the chair back a few inches. Oliver stopped in front of her desk.

“Yeah, but we… I mean we are not friends yet. People with our history don’t just turn into friends.”

Felicity nodded. “Yeah.”

“But we will still see each other often,” Oliver added. “You are working with my father. We have the same friends. We are both Nicolas’ godparents. We have to find a way to be around each other without everything being awkward.”

“And you think having dinner the day we are officially divorced is the right way to achieve that?”

“The longer we wait, the more complicated it will be. Don’t you think?” Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I mean we’ve been walking on eggshells around each other for a year now. It’s time to start finding a common ground for the future.”

Felicity hesitated. “What do you suggest?”

“I suggest we try out that new Italian restaurant that opened in Orchid Bay. There are no shared memories linked to the place. We can make new memories as… as friends.”

Oliver almost felt like he was choking on that word. Thinking about Felicity and him as friends was unbearable. If that was the only possibility to keep her in life, he’d do everything he could to make it work, though.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “If you think this is a good idea, fine.”

“Great.” Oliver smiled cautiously. “Do you need more time to work or-“

“I have a few emails to write, so if you could give me twenty minutes, that would be great.”

Oliver nodded. “Sure. I’ll go downstairs to the lobby, so you can work. Just come downstairs when you are ready, and we go. I have my car in the parking garage, so I can drive.”

“Sounds good.”

“Good.” Oliver nodded slowly. “See you later, Felicity.”

“See you later, Oliver.”

As Oliver turned around to head back to the elevator, he realized that talking to Felicity still made him feel the same prickling in the pit of his stomach that he had felt the very first time he had met her. It would be an incredibly hard way for them to find a new common ground to interact with each other.

_“And now?”_

_“Now I am going to lie down and sleep,” Felicity told him. “I’m so exhausted.”_

_She slipped out of her shoes with a sigh and walked around the bed. She sat down on the edge of the mattress, grabbed Oliver’s left hand and lay down next to him with her head resting on his shoulder and her back pressing against his side. She could feel Oliver’s lips pressing to the back of her head._

_“Is this okay?” she asked, aware of his bruises._

_“It’s perfect,” Oliver whispered back. For a long time, nobody said a word. Felicity stroked her hand up and down Oliver’s forearm, keeping her eyes open despite the tiredness. She just needed to enjoy this moment first. He rested his cheek against her head, asking, “Do you think we will be okay?”_

_“Of course we will be,” Felicity replied. “We’re Oliver and Felicity. We always survive.”_

_She linked her fingers with Oliver, but frowned when she turned their hands, so she could press a kiss to the knuckles of his hand._

_“Where is your ring?” she asked._

_“Oh, I guess they put it away for surgery. Wait, I-” She could feel him move behind her and a drawer being opened before he added, “Got it.”_

_Felicity took the ring from him and slid it onto his left hand where it belonged. She linked their fingers and kissed the back of his hand like she had meant to do before._

_“So, you’re keeping me despite everything?” Oliver asked, a slightly teasing tone in his voice._

_“Sure, I do,” Felicity replied with a tired sigh. “I love you.”_

_“I love you, too,” Oliver whispered back and kissed the back of her head once more. “And now sleep. You need to rest. I will do the same.”_

Oliver’s steps faltered at the memory that didn’t feel like a memory. At least he couldn’t remember a time that he had spent in the hospital with a cast on his leg, and something like this had happened. He didn’t know where it had come from all of a sudden.

The words _We’re Oliver and Felicity. We always survive._ seemed to burn themselves into his mind now, though. God, how much he wished they were true.

* * * * *

“The evening got a lot longer than I thought.”

“I would apologize, but I think that was on you and your three desserts.”

Felicity hit him with her purse playfully. “Hey, I’m single now. I can eat as much as you want.”

“You could eat as much as you wanted when you were married too,” Oliver replied teasingly. “I never stopped you.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” Felicity grinned. “You and Raisa encouraged my eating habits very intently though you did try to turn it into something healthies.”

“Someone needed to look out for you.”

Silence settled between the two of them and Felicity smiled quietly, lowering her eyes to her feet. Oliver almost regretted saying what he had said.

“Good thing I know that you can take care of yourself,” he added after a moment. “Otherwise, I would be really worried about you now.”

“I am a big girl with the phone numbers of several delivery services, and I do my best not just to order pizza, burger and fries though they are the yummiest food,” Felicity said, rummaging for her keys in her purse. “Besides, Thea sometimes steals some of Raisa’s food from the mansion to bring it to me, but don’t tell anyone.”

Oliver chuckled, pretending to lock his lips. “Your secret is safe with me.”

“Finally,” Felicity said with a sigh when she waved with her keys. She turned to the door and unlocked it. Switching on the light in the entrance area and putting her purse to the small table next to the door, she turned back around to him and leaned into the doorframe. “This evening was really nice. It was way easier than I thought it would be.”

“Well, we’ve been in each other’s life too long for it not to work, right?”

Felicity smiled. “I hope so.”

“We will make it work.” Oliver gently stroked a strand of Felicity’s hair back behind her ear, making her blush. “We just have to work on it for a little longer.”

“Sounds good.” Felicity nodded. “It will make it easier to get through Nicolas’ birthday party.”

“Indeed,” Oliver agreed. He smiled at her for a moment. “Goodnight, Felicity.”

“Goodnight, Oliver,” Felicity replied.

There was a moment of hesitation that nobody was sure what to do. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip briefly before she stepped forward and hugged him. Oliver smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist and lowering his face to her neck. He breathed her in, enjoying the flowery perfume that mixed with the sweet scent of her skin. He hadn’t known how much he had really missed her until just now, and he had already thought that his longing for her had reached a maximum the moment he had realized that their marriage was taking a bump from the lack of success in starting their family.

Oliver could have stood there with Felicity in his arms for hour. Unfortunately, much sooner than he was happy with, Felicity pulled away. A strand of her hair got caught with a button of his coat, though.

“Ow, ow, ow,” Felicity called out, pulling at her hair to try freeing it while simultaneously easing the pain. “Help me please.”

“I’m trying,” Oliver chuckled, but Felicity kept moving, making it incredibly hard to free her hair. “Stop moving.”

“That’s easy to say. It hurts and-“

“Done,” Oliver said as soon as he got the strand freed. “Already done.”

Felicity angled her head back cautiously and sighed with relief when she was actually able to do so.

“Thank god,” she said with a chuckle, leaning against him. “I almost thought I’d forever be stuck with your jacket.”

“You would have had to find ways to use the jacket as a stylish hair accessory.”

“I am not sure how stylish your coat is in my hair. Sorry.”

Oliver stayed silent as his throat felt tight. Felicity was stroking her hands up and down the lapels of his coat. He doubted that she had done so on purpose because, as soon as she realized, she stopped moving her hands over his chest. They stayed where they were, though, while she was looking at them for a long moment.

Eventually, she lifted her eyes and looked at him. Oliver held his breath. Only now he realized how close to him she was standing. He could feel her breath against his chin, and, if he listened really closely, he could swear that he heard her heartbeat. A long moment of silence passed that neither of them moved. They just looked the other straight in the eyes.

For the break of a second, Oliver’s gaze lowered to her lips – the full, red-painted lips he had always loved to look at when she had been talking and that he had loved to swipe his bottom lip over when he had held her face in his hands and that he had loved to kiss at any given opportunity. When his eyes lifted to her eyes again – the blue-grey eyes that he had loved to see first thing in the morning and that he had loved to get lost in whenever Felicity had looked at him and that he loved to consider his home more than any place – her eyes were filled with desire.

Oliver didn’t know who made first, but Felicity’s chest was pressed against his suddenly. His arms wrapped around her his neck, one hand moving into his hair, while his arms wrapped around her waist and held her to him tightly. Their lips met in a hungry kiss that told the story of how much they had missed each other.

It had been more of a year since he had last kissed her, last felt the softness of her lips against his or last tasted the taste of her tongue on his. During their last weeks together, they had still kissed occasionally. Even before Felicity had told him that she felt like a divorce was the best solution for them, he had felt that she was drawing back from him emotionally. There had been kisses and even sex, and they had even still loved each other, but, by the time Felicity had told him that she didn’t believe their marriage still stood a chance, they had been miles apart emotionally.

In the back of his mind, Oliver knew that this kiss wasn’t going to solve any of the problems that had caused them to drift this far apart. It didn’t matter, though. He hadn’t felt this good in more and a year. It was like he had run around as half a person before these last months. This was as close as feeling like a whole person again as he hadn’t been in a ways too long time.

Their lips and tongue were still moving together when Felicity pulled at the lapels of his coat and tugged him inside. Oliver kicked the door shut behind him, giving his best not to stumble over his own feet as he followed her inside. Felicity lost now time, trying to get him out of his coat. She tried tugging at his lapels of his coat again, this time not to move him but his coat, though. He managed to tug it down to his elbows, but Oliver’s arms were still wrapped around her waist tightly.

“Oliver,” she whispered against his lips between two kisses.

Oliver groaned. He didn’t want to let go of her now that she was back in his arms. Felicity continued tugging at his coat, though, so Oliver gave in. Only a second later, his coat was on the floor. Felicity started unbuttoning her own coat, and Oliver helped her.

As soon as it joined his on the floor, Oliver bent his knees a little and put his hands to the back of Felicity’s knees. She jumped up at him, wrapping her arms around his hips. Oliver angled her head back. Felicity’s face was hovering right over his. Her hands rested against his cheeks, her fingernails scratching through his short stubble gently. Her eyes were taking his face in with pupils that were blown wide with desire. Her lips were opened slightly, and she was breathing erratically.

“Bedroom is the second door to the right.”

It was all the encouragement Oliver hadn’t known he had needed. Felicity lowered her lips back onto his and started tugging at his shirt. Oliver started carrying her to the bedroom. They interrupted the kiss only for a moment when Felicity lifted his shirt over his head and dropped it to the floor. They next moment, their lips were brushing together again.

In the bedroom, Oliver lay Felicity down on the bed. He kept his chest propped up on his hands. When he started to move his head a little bit further down, intending to kiss down her body, Felicity lifted her head off the mattress to follow his lips and prolong the kiss. Eventually, she rested her head back with a sigh, though. Oliver lost no time and brushed his lips against her chin and neck. He nibbled at her collar bone for a moment, and, when he dug his teeth into her tender skin there teasingly, Felicity gasped for breath. She arched her back and moved her hands into his short hair.

Oliver nuzzled her collarbone for a moment before he lifted his head a little, so he could watch her face. Her eyes were closed. Her teeth dug into her bottom lip. She looked beautiful in the low light that came from the window. If Oliver wasn’t hungry for her already, the sight of her alone would be enough to make him starve for more.

Lowering his lips back to her skin, Oliver started to tug down the zipper at the front of her blue dress slowly. His lips followed where more and more skin of her were exposed. He kissed down between her breasts and over her stomach to her lower abdomen. His tongue followed the hem of her panties, and Felicity’s back arched off the mattress even more.

“Oliver,” Felicity breathed out his name. “Please.”

With an amused smile, Oliver kneeled on the floor between her spread legs. Felicity had always enjoyed teasing as foreplay, but she was terrible at enduring it for too long. She was too impatient, too quickly set on fire. Oliver couldn’t hold it against her. It was the same way for him, at least if he was on the receiving end of the teasing.

Oliver kissed down Felicity’s right leg, starting at the hip and stopping at the ankle. He took off her pump before kissing the same way back up and continuing with the left leg the same way. He peppered kisses over her stomach and dipped his tongue into her belly button, making Felicity laugh out loud.

“Oliver!” she giggled.

Oliver rested his chin and grinned at her. He hadn’t seen her this relax in like forever. The last time she had giggled during sex had been years ago. Oliver didn’t want to delve back into the problems they had had right now, though, so he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her panties and slowly pulled them down. While he threw the little lacey fabric back over his shoulder, Felicity sat up to take off the opened dress as well as her bra. She threw both in the same direction when she already lay back.

Putting her legs over his shoulders and resting his forearms on her hips to keep her down, Oliver lost no time to lean forward. His lips wrapped around her clit and sucked at it gently. Felicity moaned out loudly. Her fingers dug into his forearms, holding onto it firmly. He could feel her hips trying to move under his arms, but he kept her down. He wanted to pleasure her before he let her move on her own will, increasing her pleasure the way she wanted and needed it.

Oliver couldn’t remember when had been the last time that he had kneeled between her legs and pleasured her with his tongue. He had always loved going down on her. He loved the way she squirmed beneath his hold and the way she moaned every time he sucked at her clit a little.

“God, Oliver,” she moaned out when he stopped sucking and stroked his thumb against the sensitive nubbin instead. “Yes.”

Oliver continued stroking his tongue against her clit, alternating between using the rougher top if his tongue and the softer underside. Felicity’s squirming got wilder, and her moans became louder. She tasted so good, and she felt so good.

When her heels started digging into his back, keeping him in place, Oliver knew she was close. Her legs were quivering, and Oliver was sure that her fingernails would leave little, red marks on his forearm. He didn’t mind, though. He had always loved carrying any marks she would leave on him.

Soon, her breathing got erratic. When her body started to tense, the orgasm so close for her, Oliver moved his hands off her hips, giving her the freedom to move the way she wanted. Felicity’s his moved against his lips, chasing her release, and it wasn’t long until she came with a choked cry.

Oliver carried her through the waves of her pleasure that were rushing through her body, making it shake uncontrollably. He licked a path down between her wet folds to her entrance, dipping the tip of his tongue inside, before he moved back to her clit without touching it. He knew it was too sensitive right now for him to touch it. Felicity’s cries turned into long moans and, eventually, to quiet sighs of content. Oliver could live from all of those sounds.

When Felicity started to get her control back over her body, she grabbed some strands of his hair. Oliver gave into it easily. He moved up her body and lay down on her, covering her smaller body with his easily. His cock was hard, straining against the boxers and the zippers of his jeans. Felicity’s legs wrapped around his hips as their lips met in another hungry kiss, and Oliver couldn’t stop himself from rubbing himself against her to get some friction and ease some of his need.

“You are terribly overdressed,” Felicity whispered against his lips. “We gotta do something about that.”

“Yeah,” Oliver agreed.

He slipped out of his shoes and socks before he pulled his legs under him, sitting back on his heels. Before he could start getting rid off his pants, Felicity had already sat up. Her fingers unbuckled his belt with quick movements. She unbuttoned his pants and reached into his boxers, wrapping her fingers around his hard cock.

“God.”

Oliver screwed his eyes shut, his head falling back into his neck. Her hand moved up and down his shaft with quick, teasing movements. Oliver couldn’t stop himself from thrusting into her hand. It didn’t take long until he felt his pleasure increasing too much. He shook off Felicity’s hand and quickly climbed out of bed, taking off his jeans and boxer briefs.

Felicity moved further up the bed until her head way resting the fluffy pillow. Oliver crawled back into bed over her. His knees were resting between her slightly spread legs and his hands were at the level of her shoulders. He looked at her face for a moment, and they both smiled. Only then did he slower lower himself onto her. Their naked bodies pressed together. Felicity’s arms wrapped around him and stroked down his muscular back. His hot, hard cock made contact with her soft, wet folds, and they both moaned at the feelings.

Their lips met in another kiss. It was a slow kiss, full of passion and love. Their bodies started moving together. His cock continued pressing against her folds, not entering her yet. He felt a tingling in the base of his spine. He wanted Felicity, and he needed her. He didn’t want to hurry through this. He wanted to enjoy every moment they had and prolong this for as long as possible.

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered against his lips, her fingernails scratching down his back. “Please.”

Oliver stroked his tongue against the roof of her moth for a moment before he pulled back enough to look at her. Their eyes locked, the need they had for each other visible in them. He grabbed hold of his cock and positioned himself at her entrance. Felicity arched her back when he started teasing her with the tip of his cock, entering her only for one or two inches before pulling away.

When her legs wrapped around his hips, anchoring him to her, Oliver released a breathless chuckle, and finally gave in. He sank into her slowly. Felicity’s lips opened in a soundless cry. He could see that she was fighting to keep her eyes open, but she managed to do so. Her eyes stayed on his the entire time. Once he was seated inside of her completely, he stilled. They were both breathing erratically. Their hearts were beating together in the same quick rhythm. The tips of Felicity’s fingers were still moving up and down his back. Oliver played with a strand of her hair, swirling it around her finger. He took one of the hands of her back and laced his fingers trough hers, resting them on the pillow next to her head.

As their lips met again, their bodies started moving together. Oliver pulled out slightly before thrusting back in. Those were shallow movements. The feelings of being back inside of Felicity, having her lips moving against his hungrily and feeling that she was focused on him and only him, was almost overwhelming already. The emotional connection he could feel in their physical connection was so much that he couldn’t and didn’t want to ruin it with a quick, overhurried build-up of pleasure just yet.

His movements became firmer gradually. He pulled back more and thrusted back in more firmly with every thrust. Felicity arched her back, meeting his thrusts. When a particularly hard thrust made his pubic area rub against her clit, Felicity angled her head back and released a loud moan. Oliver used the opportunity to brush his lips down her jaw to her neck. His lips captured her pulse point, peppering half a dozen kisses to it gently before he sucked at it. Felicity moaned in response, her legs tightening around his hips as she started to quicken the thrust she met his with.

When Oliver felt a tingle in the base of his spine, telling him that he was growing closer to his orgasm, he tightened his fingers around hers.

“Felicity,” he whispered between two kisses, letting her know how close he was already.

“Yeah,” Felicity whispered back, her legs tightening around his hips once more.

It was all Oliver needed to know that she wasn’t that far behind either. He bit down into her bottom lip playfully before he pulled back enough to look at her face. Felicity opened her eyes, looking back at him. Her pupils were blown wide with pleasure, and Oliver was sure that her facial expression was mirrored on his face.

Oliver quickened his thrusts, moving into her at rapid speed and pressing down hard, so his pubic area would continue to stimulate her clit. Felicity’s fingernails dug into the skin of his back. As soon as her body started tensing, the orgasming right in reach, Oliver alternated his thrusts with rocking movements, pushing in more and more without pulling out a lot. It only took a couple of seconds for Felicity’s lips to open in a soundless cry. Her body was shaking, and her heart hammered against her chest with so much force, it was almost like it wanted to jump right into his body. Her walls fluttered around his cock, triggering his own orgasm. With one last firm thrust, Oliver released into her.

“Felicity,” his name fell from his lips.

Their eyes stayed locked as the waves of pleasures jolted through their bodies. In this moment, there was a connection between them that they hadn’t had in far too long. It was like they could look right into the other’s soul and see all the pain the last years had caused both of them. As the waves of their orgasm started to ebb, their lips met in another kiss. It was raw and passionate, all the suppressed feelings of the last months getting back to the surface.

“Marry me,” Oliver whispered.

_Both of them breathed heavily._

_Felicity pulled her legs up higher on his waist, creating a new angle and making Oliver go so deep she could almost see stars. They groaned into each other’s mouth and raced towards their release._

_“Marry me,” he groaned when he felt her inner walls tighten around him and stressed his words with a deep thrust._

_“Yes!” she exclaimed her back arching off the bed, and her eyes screwing shut when she fell over the edge._

_Oliver stopped moving, swallowing her moans by kissing her without closing his eyes. He wanted to see her, to see her face._

_When Felicity finally came back to her senses, she opened her eyes and stared at Oliver who was staring right back, still buried deep inside of her. His cock still hard._

_“Was that a yes to my question or a shout of pleasure?” he asked, eying up her face. “I think the context allows both interpretations.”_

_“Hm,” Felicity said, moving slightly and regretting it right away when she felt him moving insider of her. “I don’t know.”_

_“You don’t know?” Oliver asked, frowning._

_“Well… Don’t you want to take it back?” she said. “I mean, you asked in a very… the time was…”_

_He lifted his eyebrows. “Yeah, the timing may not have been perfect,” he agreed. “But I meant it. Will you marry me?”_

_Felicity still stared at him. “Are you sure? I mean… the timing, and I don’t mean the sex… although that is a quiet strange moment to propose. But what I really meant was… well, I don’t really know what I meant… maybe… okay, look, I just believed that you were going to break up with me. And that is a very emotional thing. Maybe you just feel forced to ask me to reassure me, but I promise that that is not necessary. You love me. You don’t want to leave me. I get it. You don’t have to propose.”_

_Oliver remained moveless for a second before he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her softly. When he pulled back, his eyes locked with hers again._

_“I love you, Felicity. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Please marry me.”_

_“You’re serious?” Felicity asked and Oliver nodded. “Wow.”_

_She stared up to him, nodding. Oliver pressed his lips together._

_“Okay, look, maybe this is all too fast for you. I’m sorry. It’s okay if you don’t want to or need time to think about it… You can take your time. That’s okay… Although it feels a little strange because I am still inside of you and…”_

_“I love it when you babble,” Felicity smiled under him, breathed in deeply and propped herself up to her forearms. “I love you and yes, I want to marry you.”_

_One moment they were smiling at each other, and the next their lips were pressed together again, and Oliver readopted his movements._

Oliver shook the daydream off to focus on Felicity’s reaction. For the break of a second, he could feel Felicity tense beneath him before she relaxed again. She angled her head back to look at him. A frown had spread on her forehead, and Oliver loosened his hand from her hair to gentle smooth the wrinkles out of her skin.

“Oliver we just got officially divorced today,” Felicity told him with a chuckle. “You can’t ask me to marry you.”

“But I do,” Oliver replied matter-of-factly. “If I have come to realize something over the last year, and especially the last hours I guess, it’s that we lost ourselves. We wanted a family, and, at some point, it grew into more than a wish for the future. It turned into our whole life. We put all or heart and energy into that, so we didn’t realize that we didn’t put any heart or energy into our marriage any longer, and we certainly didn’t put any heart or energy into fighting for our marriage when we should have. When you told me that you felt a divorce was the best solution for us, I just sat there and nodded because I felt I had nothing left to give. I was wrong.”

Felicity’s eyes filled with emotions. He could see that she was holding back tears, and he actually felt the same way. He squeezed her hand gently and brushed the knuckles of his fingers against her cheek.

“Looking back, I think that the divorce might have been what was best for us after all,” Oliver continued after a moment, “but not because I don’t want to be with you anymore. It’s because I think that the divorce, as a clean cut, will give us the opportunity to start over. You said you didn’t want me to stay with you because you thought I would eventually hold it against you that I didn’t have the chance to be a dad when we always said we wanted to have kids. Now it’s different. I know we cannot have kids together, and I know you don’t want any other options. I know that. I respect that. I accept that. Still, I wanna get married to you under these new circumstances.”

Felicity was speechless it seemed which Oliver knew didn’t happen often. She opened her mouth, about to say something, but closed it against when no sound came out. She looked at him, and Oliver could feel that she was looking for hesitation or anything that told him that he didn’t really mean it. He knew she wouldn’t find anything in his eyes, though. He did mean it.

“Oliver.”

It was just a whisper of her name, but nothing more. Felicity seemed to be struggling with what to say. Oliver gave her the time she needed. He knew this was a big thing.

“I don’t want to take the chance to become a dad from you,” she whispered eventually. “I know how great you are with kids. I know how much you love Nicolas. Laurel and Tommy told me how much time you are spending with him, and how great you are with him. You can’t tell me that you don’t want that too, a little boy who looks like you and that you can teach football or baseball or... archery.”

“Archery?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “Why not?”

“Yeah, why not,” Oliver replied. He sighed and stroked his fingertips over her cheek. “Felicity, I wanted a baby because I wanted a baby with you. That was what it was about. Now, things changed. We can’t have a baby, so all I want and need for my family is you.”

“But-“

“No more buts, Felicity.”

_When Felicity’s sobs slowly became quieter, Oliver pressed a kiss to her ear and then whispered, “You know I love you, right?”_

_Oliver felt a first relief when Felicity nodded against the side of his neck, her face still hidden against his skin. “And you know that you’re not going to get rid of me anytime soon, right? Even if we have different opinions. Right?”_

_“But-“ Felicity started to object, but Oliver hastily cut her off._

_“Felicity, we have two perfectly healthy children, a girl and a boy. What else would we want?” he asked gently, wiping some tears away from her face. “And you know that I am in this marriage for us and not only because of the children.”_

_“But-“_

_“No more buts, Felicity,” Oliver said gently. “You know all those things. I know that you know those things._

„Oliver?“

„Sorry.“ Oliver squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. “I’m a little bit dizzy.”

“There’s a bottle of water on the floor,” Felicity said, stroking her hand over his cheek.

“Later,” Oliver replied with raspy voice. “I need you to know that I mean this. I want to start our marriage over with these new knowledge and-“

_“Call Lance,” Oliver requested, looking at Nielsen, who was lying on the floor and groaning in pain._

_“Already done,” Felicity replied. “The police on their way and- Everything alright?”_

_Oliver saw black dots dancing in front of his eyes. His stomach cramped slightly. His breathing was getting strained. He leaned against Nielsen’s van, trying to get himself back under control. If he wasn’t feeling like he would throw up any minute, he’d actually joke about his age like he knew Felicity would if things were different_

_“Just dizzy.” Oliver swallowed down hard. He squeezed his eyes shut several times, trying to chase away the black dots. His sight only seem to blur more, though. “I am just getting him tied up and come home to-“_

_Oliver lost all feeling for his body. He sank down onto his knees and fell to the cold ground. His eyes stayed wide open for a moment as he was panting. What was happening?_

_“Oliver!”_

_With Felicity panicked scream in his ear, he passed out._

“Not again.”

Oliver groaned, resting his forehead against the top of Felicity’s chest and squeezing his eyes shut. It had been less than two years since he had been caught up in a hallucination like this the last time. Back then, he and Felicity hadn’t been able to have kids, either, and, just like today, he had had flashbacks to their real life together again and again. He had used the opportunity to say goodbye to his parents like he hadn’t gotten a chance to say goodbye to them in real life.

If this was true, and he had indeed been hit with Vertigo, this was the forth time that happened. In his first year back from the island, he had been hit with it. Back then, he had gone to Felicity with a syringe, claiming it was an energy drink that he wanted to know what was in there.

_“Felicity.” Oliver smiled as he and John approached her. “Hey, they said you'd be up here.”_

_Felicity looked him up and down. “You look like something the cat dragged in. Not that there are cats in this building. Well, once a cat did get in, but a guard tazed it. It smelled like fur and static in here for like a week.”_

_Oliver tried to focus on her words. He knew he’d usually be amused about her babbling. Something about talking to her always felt so easy. The effects of the Vertigo were still running high, though. The jalousies behind Felicity were closed, but the little sun shining through was enough to worsen his headache._

_“Ahem. Would you mind stepping away from the window for a moment? I have a little bit of a hangover.”_

_“Sounds like you need a bloody Mary and a pretzel, not the I.T. Department,” Felicity said as she switched places with him._

_“Actually, my buddy Kevin is starting an energy drink company,” Oliver said. Felicity crossed her arms in front of his chest as Oliver pulled the syringe where the rest of the serum was in out of the pocket of his jacket. “He says it's fantastic for curing hangovers, but I am very particular about what it is I put in my body.”_

_“I've noticed.” Felicity’s eyes traveled up his body slowly before they met his. She quickly squeezed her eyes shut again. “I said, not noticed. Right?”_

_Despite his headache, Oliver chuckled. He wasn’t sure if she was smitten by him or he by her or if it was mutual, but, God, how much he enjoyed these short, little talks. “I'm trying to find a secret recipe. Could you please do a spectroanalysis of the sample and find out exactly where in the city it's made?”_

_He handed her the syringe, and Felicity looked at it. When she spoke, a giant you-cannot-be-serious-expression mixed with a why-do-I-have-to-put-up-with-this-expression was written all over her face._

_“If it's an energy drink,” she asked, speaking slowly like he was dump which, given his poor story, he couldn’t hold against her, “why is it in a syringe?”_

_“I ran out of sports bottles.”_

_Oliver could feel Diggle’s eyes on him, before he walked past them. Felicity shot a brief look into his direction before looking at Oliver again with cocked head. If the expression on  her face was any indication, she didn’t buy his story one bit.”_

_“Okay,” she whispered, walking past him with a slight roll of her eyes._

_Oliver went to Diggle, who was already waiting at the elevators._

_“Your B.S. stories are getting worse.”_

_Oliver pressed his lips together. “I'm well aware.”_

Less than two years later, he had been hit with the drug again, the night after his first date with Felicity that had ended in a giant explosion. Werner Zytle had hit him with the new version of Vertigo, and Oliver had fought himself in a hallucination.

_“When Werner hit me with the Vertigo dart, he told me that his formula, it shows us our worst fear. And I saw myself.”_

_Felicity looked at him with eyes full of worry. “You don't really think you're afraid of yourself, do you?”_

_Oliver sucked in a deep breath, thinking about it for a moment. “I think I'm scared of what would happen if I let myself be Oliver Queen.”_

A few years later, the autumn after Tommy had been born, Oliver had been hit with a drug, too. It hadn’t been Vertigo, but it had been just as poisonous. He had pointed an arrow at Felicity and chocked her. It hadn’t been bad enough to cause severe damaged, but it had left marks on her neck.

Two years ago, he had been hit with the latest version of Vertigo then. He had been out for hours, and, even after waking up, he had still been quite out of himself. He had had a headache for days.

_“Felicity?” Oliver asked, dropping his head to her shoulder and hiding her face against the side of her neck._

_“Hm?” Felicity asked, massaging his scalp with her gentle fingers and eliciting a content hum from him that made her smile. “Are you feeling dizzy?”_

_“A little,” Oliver mumbled. “I need to ask you something.”_

_“Everything,” Felicity whispered in response._

_She thought Oliver would pull back to look her in the eyes when he was going to ask her whatever he needed to know, but he just tightened his arms around her._

_“Do you ever feel like I only love you because you gave me a family? Or that our marriage would be over now if we hadn’t been able to have children?”_

_Felicity frowned slightly, wondering where this was coming from. Of course kids had been quite the topic for them in their marriage. Oliver had wanted kids and family, she knew that. It had never bothered her, though, because she had wanted this, too. They both had wanted to start a family together and even if there had been some minor disagreements and some big surprises along the way, they had always been on the same page when it had mattered._

_“I know that you love me for more than my ability to have your children,” Felicity replied, knowing that whatever the drug had done with him caused him to be so shaken. Oliver needed reassurance. “There is so much more to us than our kids.”_

_“And you know that I would have never left you if we couldn’t have kids, right?”_

_“I know that,” Felicity assured him._

_It was the truth. Felicity was sure that it would have taken more than not having kids to pull them apart. Of course, she didn’t knew the pain of wanting a baby and not being able to have one, so maybe that was wrong. It didn’t matter, though, since that was never going to be a part of their reality._

_“In my dream, we couldn’t have kids,” Oliver said with a sigh and pulled away enough to look at her. His arms stayed wrapped around her waist. “At the beginning of the day, we were still so hopeful, but the more time passed… I don’t know… you thought I was going to leave you.”_

_“I know you wouldn’t,” Felicity replied, putting a hand to his cheek and watching him lean into her touch. She smiled, not saying a word for a long moment. “Is that what you dreamed about? Us not being able to have babies?”_

_“It was part of it,” Oliver answered without opening his eyes. “I think I’ve never been on the Gambit, though. My parents were alive and happy. Laurel and Tommy were married and expecting their first child. Quentin and Dinah were still married. Sara was alive.”_

_Felicity smiled sadly. So many things seemed to have turned to the worse since Oliver had gotten on the Gambit. For years they had become worse and worse and worse without any light at the end of the tunnel until there had been a turning point, whenever that had been exactly._

_“If you never went on the Gambit, how did we meet?”_

_“I have no idea,” Oliver replied. He opened his eyes to look at her. “I wasn’t the Arrow.”_

_“So we were one of those terribly boring married couples?” Felicity asked with a chuckle, trying to kind of lighten the mood._

_“I don’t know.” Oliver sighed. He rubbed his hands over his face before he put them to Felicity’s baby bump, stroking back and forth gently. “I can see why they thought this drug was a good idea. The potential to grow addicted to it has to be very high.”_

_“You would like to go back there?” Felicity asked compassionately._

_“No,” Oliver replied firmly, “but I guess a lot of people would.”_

 “Not again, what?” Felicity asked, calling him back to the presence of his hallucination. “What do you mean?”

Oliver felt his breathing getting strained, his lids growing heavier. He pressed his nose against Felicity’s chest, taking in a deep breath to breathe her in. He knew she wasn’t his Felicity. His Felicity was probably sitting at his side, holding his hand and stroking her fingers through his hair, while she was waiting for him to wake up. Still, this was a version of the woman he loved, and he wanted and needed her to be happy. He wished he had the chance to tell her how much he wished that she would be happy, how much she deserved love and happiness, but he already felt himself passing out.

\----->

When Oliver felt the feeling getting back into his body again, the first thing he realized was that he was no longer lying on his stomach with Felicity’s chest pressed against his. Instead, he was lying on his back with his head resting in a pillow and a blanket wrapped around him safely. He was surprised it wasn’t the med table in the bunker. The last time he had been drugged, he had been handcuffed to it to make sure he wasn’t going to her himself or anyone else.

The next thing Oliver felt was a hand on his left forearm and the caress of gentle fingers stroking through his hair. A smile spread on Oliver’s lips or at least in his chest. Hadn’t he known that this was exactly what his Felicity would do if he woke up?

Once his lids didn’t feel as heavy anymore, Oliver opened his eyes. His view was blurred, so he squeezed his eyes shut and opened them a few times until he could see more than blurry schemes. Felicity’s face, hovering right over his, got clearer. He could even see the worry in her grey-blue eyes.

“Thank God,” she whispered, leaning forward and kissing his forehead. “I thought this was going to take all night. How are you feeling?”

“Good.”

“That’s a lie,” Felicity said immediately. She moved her fingers over his forehead and cheeks. “The fever is down. That’s good.”

“Fever?”

“Yes, for the last half an hour-“

When Oliver started coughing, his throat feeling tight and dry, Felicity stopped. She put her warm hand to the back of his neck and lifted it off the pillow. She held a glass of water to his lips, and Oliver took some sips. He looked at her and nodded his head when he had enough, and Felicity put the glass back onto the nightstand. Felicity’s arms wrapped around him carefully, and Oliver snuggled closer to her, resting his cheek against the top of her chest to listen to her heartbeat.

“How are you really feeling?”

She kept her voice lowered, and the room was put into darkness. Only a low light was burning at the other end of the room. Maybe that was why it took him a moment what was wrong.

“I have a terrible headache.”

“Yeah, I was thinking so,” Felicity whispered. “You should sleep some more hours until the Vertigo is out of your system completely.”

“What happened with Nielsen?”

“The police got him.”

“And that bank rubbery?”

“John took care of it,” Felicity told him and kissed the top of his head. “Tommy and Laurel brought you to the bunker. I did a spectroanalysis of the new Vertigo. The recipe is close to the one of the last version you were hit with, but some things were changed.”

Oliver nodded slightly. “That explains a lot.”

“Explains what?” Felicity asked. She gently massaged his scalp, and Oliver almost purred at the touch, closing his eyes. “You’ve been groaning a lot while you were out. Were you in pain?”

Oliver thought back to his drug-induced dream, and the way his dinner with Felicity had ended. He easily believed that he had groaned. Even in his hallucinations, they seemed to harmonize in bed perfectly. A teenager’s wet dream couldn’t be more inspiring.

“No. No, pain,” Oliver replied.

Despite his headache, he angled his head back and grinned at Felicity. When he wiggled with his eyebrows, leaving no room for interpretation, Felicity chuckled lowly.

“And who was the lucky one?”

“My ex-wife.”

“Your ex-wife,” Felicity said. She perked up her eyebrows. “You wanna tell me something?”

Oliver smiled at her for a moment before he snuggled his ear back to the top of her chest and closed his eyes. He listened to the strong, even beat of her heart for a long moment. Without looking at her, he started telling her the story of what he had seen. She seemed to remember his last hallucination well because she made the connection on her own. While he told her what happened, Felicity stayed quiet. She just continued moving her fingers through his hair and listened carefully, only speaking when she had questions.

“I know she’s not you,” Oliver whispered at the end of his story. “I know she’s not even real, but I still want her to be happy, you know?”

“Of course,” Felicity whispered. “You lived with her, only if for a couple of hours actually. During those hours, she was real to you, though. She is a version of me that lives on in your head. Of course you want her to be happy, just like I want that version of Oliver to be happy.”

Oliver angled his head back and smiled at her. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For understanding,” Oliver whispered, “and for not brushing it aside.”

“Always.” Felicity smiled and kissed his forehead. “Do you want something to eat now?”

Oliver scrunched up his nose. “Not really. I feel a little sick to be honest and dizzy.”

“Then I suggest you try catching some sleep. I am sure it’s what is best for you.”

“Where are the kids?” Oliver asked with a frown.

“With Tommy.” Felicity smiled. “He volunteered to take all five of them. I figured since it’s the first time he takes care of all of them at the same time, I should go easy on him. I sent him Raisa for help, and Laurel might show up too.”

“Is there finally something going on between them?”

Felicity sighed. “I don’t think so. After what Tommy has been through, it’s not easy for him to think about letting someone in enough for a relationship, and it’s especially hard given their history together.”

Oliver nodded slowly. “Yeah, it took me almost two and a half years after the island to let someone in.”

“They will need time,” Felicity whispered. “Maybe one day it will work out for them, together or with someone else.”

When Oliver felt his tiredness crashing over him, he turned himself from his side to his stomach, pressing Felicity in the mattress beneath him. He groaned, stretching out her legs between hers and snuggling his cheek to her chest. His arms moved beneath her back, hugging her even more firmly to his chest.

“You know what would help me falling asleep?”

“Please don’t say you want me to sing you a lullaby.”

Oliver chuckled. When Felicity was really sick or on pain meds or something like that, she sometimes asked him to sing her a lullaby. Usually, she asked for Disney songs. Since he had sung a slightly adapted version of _The little mermaid_ ’s _Part of your world_ to Emmy once, Felicity always teased him with his talent for singing. She made good use of it whenever his weakness for her showed particularly bright like when she was sick or had a rough day… or just breathed.

“No,” he replied eventually. “It would be like falling asleep to Laurel’s Canary Cry. I don’t see that happening, either.”

Felicity playfully punched his shoulder, putting not even have as much strength into it than when she usually punched him playfully. He guessed it was the bonus of having been drugged.

“You could tell me the end to my hallucination, though,” Oliver whispered. “Like what you thought happened after our night together the night we got officially divorced.”

Felicity hesitated. “How about three different ends to the story? You can pick which you like the most.”

Oliver sighed contently, snuggling his cheek against her breast once more. “Sounds great.”

“Okay,” Felicity replied. Still stroking her fingers through his hair, she waited a moment, probably trying to find a good story. “Okay, ready?”

“Ready,” Oliver replied without hesitation.”

“Okay then.” Felicity took in a deep breath. “I said no and-“

“You once told me that goodnight stories are always happy.”

Felicity kissed the crown of his head. “Maybe you get happy with someone else.”

“I am going to have nightmares if you continue.” Oliver groaned, tightening his arms around her. “I want three Oliver-and-Felicity-happy-forever-ends to the story.”

“Oliver-and-Felicity-happy-forever-ends?” Felicity asked and sighed. “Alright. Ready for the first possible end?”

“Ready.”

\----->

With a sigh, Oliver crawled into bed and snuggled up to Felicity’s back. His arms wrapped around her waist, holding her to him. His head came to rest in the crook of her neck and shoulder, his lips brushing against the little mole that he knew was right there even if he couldn’t see it in the darkness.

Exactly five years to the day, they had gotten remarried on a beautiful beach in Bali. The sun had shone down on them, and the sand had warmed their feet as they had said their new vows. After that, they had made sweet love in the house they had rented for their three-week-escape. Lying in bed, they had whispered more soft words of love teach other, hopeful and optimistic of their new chance of a future together.

Today, they had used their anniversary to celebrate with their family and friends. With the secret wedding in Bali, their friends had only learned about the wedding after Oliver and Felicity had come back though there had been some rumors about their possible plans for the Bali vacation already. Oliver knew that, just like back then, there had been rumors about him and Felicity tonight, too. Though everyone had been trying to hide it from him, the conversations always falling quiet the moment he or Felicity joined them, Oliver knew there had been one subject that their family and friends had talked about thoroughly.

Oliver stroked his hand from Felicity’s hip to her belly where a slight bump had been growing over the last weeks. At first, Oliver had thought she was just gaining a little weight because, for once, she wasn’t overstressed with work. She had actually taken a little step back from work and even decided to delegate some of her tasks. During the last three weeks, her belly had grown into a wonderfully defined rounding that he knew exactly how to interpret. He could even swear that he was feeling movements under the palm of his hand now, but he knew from his web searches that it was probably too early. He’d know better if he knew how far along Felicity was, but he didn’t know.

Oliver’s hand had rested against the soft rounding for less than five seconds when Felicity pushed his hand away. She kissed his palm and moved it under her head, resting her face in his warm hand.

“Don’t,” she whispered in a barely opening whisper.

Oliver bit down on his tongue. Since he had suspected that the changes of Felicity’s body had a deeper meaning than a more relaxed lifestyle, he had tried to watch her or touch her to confirm it. He had watched her when she had come out of the shower, but Felicity had always wrapped her towel around herself once she had noticed. He had tried to watch her in other situations too, but, again, she had noticed and quickly turned away or changed her position to make it harder for him to see anything. He had even touched her stomach a few times, but Felicity always found ways to take his hand away for some reason. She was hiding herself from him.

Tonight was the first night she actually said anything about it, though. Oliver had tried to address his suspicion, but Felicity was deliberately understanding him wrong every time. She hadn’t seemed to talk about it, so Oliver hadn’t pushed.

He knew this was a thin ice for them to move on. Only a little bit more than six year ago, their marriage had ended because they hadn’t been able to have a baby and that had overshadowed everything else. Whatever would happen, they couldn’t allow this to overshadow what they had built together now.

“Do you have decided when I am allowed to know about this?” Oliver asked in a quiet whisper. “It’s okay if you are not ready to talk about it yet, but I would like to know how long we will keep this a secret and pretend I don’t know.”

Felicity hesitated. “Does anyone else know?”

“I wouldn’t say they know,” Oliver replied slowly, “but Tommy, Laurel, Thea and our parents already asked me.”

Felicity tensed. “What did you tell them?”

“That I have no idea what they are talking about,” Oliver whispered, “and that they shouldn’t talk to you about it.”

“Thanks,” Felicity whispered, squeezing his hand.

“Of course.” Oliver kissed the spot where he knew she had a mole once more. “I don’t want you to feel pressured into doing anything that you are not ready for. It’s why it’s okay that you don’t want to tell me too. I’d just like to know if there is certain timeframe you have in mind, so I won’t feel tempted to ask for more because I am really excited.”

“I don’t want you to be excited.” Though Felicity whispered, he could hear a quiet sob in her voice. “I don’t want you to be happy or excited or anything. I don’t want to curse our luck and risk something happening. It’s why I don’t want to be excited yet either.”

“I know that. I respect that. I accept that.” Oliver nodded and smiled slightly, knowing those were the same words he had said to her the night he had proposed getting remarried. “I don’t want you to live in fear, though. I know things can go wrong, but, eventually, we have to face that this going right is a real possibility too. So, when is the time that we consider this a real possibility?”

“You can now when I am past twenty-four weeks.”

Oliver faltered for a moment before he asked, “Can I ask why twenty-four weeks?”

“It’s when the chances for a preemie increase. Sixty-seven percent of babies born with completion of twenty-four weeks survive. The general surviving age for babies is between twenty-two and twenty-four weeks, so I think, once we are past twenty-four weeks, I might feel safer.”

“Okay.”

This was a plan. It wasn’t a really hopeful plan yet, but that was okay. If Felicity needed more time, she’d get that. He wouldn’t push for anything.

“Can I ask you something more?” he asked in a whisper.

“I am at eighteen weeks if that is what you want to know.”

Oliver felt his heart jump into his throat. He hadn’t thought that she was that far along already. When they had first discussed having a baby, before they had known that it wouldn’t be that easy for him, they had agreed keeping a pregnancy between them until the first trimester was over. That she needed more time now was something he could understand but knowing that she was already past that time still felt meaningful to him.

“Yes, that is what I wanted to ask,” Oliver whispered. “Thank you.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied. She squeezed his hand. “Anything else you want to know?”

“No, not for now.” Oliver kissed the corner of her lips. “Thank you for this talk as well as for the party and the five wonderful years you gave me.”

“Thank you for exactly the same.”

Smiling, Oliver tightened his arms around her and their unborn baby. His heartbeat was slow and steady, but he felt like his heart had trouble to keep in his chest and not just dance out of it in pure joy. He and Felicity might actually have a baby this year. Oliver knew Felicity was right, and it was too soon to be overjoyed with this possibility, but he couldn’t not be happy about this possibility. They had never been this close to their greatest wish as they were now. This was a big thing and something to be hopeful about.

* * * * *

With a sigh, Oliver realized once more that he had no idea what they were ordering. He had been going through the beverage order five times now, and he had never made it past the non-alcoholic drinks before his thoughts had digressed. Today was the worst day for being distracted, though. They had a big party tonight, and Tommy would only come to Verdant late today since he had to go to parents’ conference day at Nicolas’ school. Oliver needed to focus. He had no idea why he was so distracted today.

Frowning, he put the beverage order aside, shaking his head and rubbing his hands over his face. Of course he knew why he was distracted. He didn’t even know why he claimed that he didn’t know. Since the wedding anniversary, he had counted down the days to this.

Today was the day that Felicity should officially tell him that she was pregnant. There had been a span of a week that it had been possible, and Oliver had done his best to be patient throughout this week. Well, his version of patience was still filled with excitement and actually quite impatient, but he had done his best to hide it.

What was not to hide was the increasing roundness of Felicity’s belly. If it was any indication, their baby was perfectly fine. He hoped his feeling wasn’t betraying him and-

“Oliver!”

At the shout of his name, Oliver looked up. Felicity was standing at the door. Her chest was falling and rising in quick movements. Though she was smiling brightly, Oliver felt panic flooding his body.

“Felicity?” He walked around the counter quickly and approached her. “What happened?”

He had already crossed the spacious room halfway when Felicity started running towards him. Only a heartbeat later, she was already in his arms, her arms wrapped around his neck and her feet dangling several inches over the floor. The way she had jumped at him, they were lucky that Oliver had never given up training. Otherwise, they would have both ended on the floor.

The thought what would have happened to their baby in that case made Oliver wrap his arms around her even more tightly. He still had no idea what was going on, and, with the little to no luck they had had in this area in the past, the tension was running high.

“What- What’s going?” Oliver asked eventually. “Did something happen?”

Felicity put her hands to his cheek and kissed him passionately. If any of his employees were watching them, neither of them cared. Oliver responded to the kiss with the same love Felicity put into it. He continued holding her slightly lifted from the floor for a couple of seconds before he set her down. His arms stayed wrapped around her tightly, though.

As soon as their lips parted, Oliver asked, “What’s going on?”

A wide smile spread on Felicity’s lips and Oliver felt himself relaxing. Her smile was mirrored on his face in a heartbeat. Whatever she wanted to tell him was good news.

“You know what’s going on,” Felicity told him, cocking her head with an amused smile. “You have known all along.”

“No.” Oliver grinned brightly. They had played this game for so long now. He wouldn’t give up before he had told her officially. “I don’t know anything.”

Felicity grinned, knowing exactly what he was doing. She opened her purse and pulled out a square piece of paper. Oliver felt his heart jumping right into his throat at the thought that he might actually get to see their baby for a first time now.

“In that case, I’ve been to the doctor today, and I have wonderful news for you.” Felicity handed him the ultrasound picture. “May I introduce to you the youngest addition to the Smoak-Queen family?”

Oliver felt his heart stop beating and his breathing falter as he looked at the ultrasound. He had always thought those pictures were just black and white shadows that only doctors could interpret. There was no doubt that this was a baby, though. He could see the head and even the nose and the lips. There was a body with two legs and two arms and though Oliver had no idea if it was true, he could feel in his heart that this little human-being was perfectly healthy.

“Oh my God,” he whispered.

“The baby is almost twelve inches long and weighs around 1.2 pound which is perfectly normal. I have run like a dozen tests, and the baby seems to be absolutely healthy so far. The development is accurate to the age, and the doctors said we shouldn’t worry too much. So far, there is no sign that-“

When a sob escaped her lips, Oliver looked up. Tears were welling in Felicity’s eyes, and she had lifted a hand in front of her lips, trying to hold another sob back. Oliver felt tears welling in his own eyes at the emotions in hers. He didn’t hesitate and wrapped her arms around her small body, one around his neck and one around his waist, as he pulled her against his chest. He hid his face against the side of her neck and breathed her in.

They were so close to their greatest wish coming true. Sixteen more weeks were separating them from having their baby. This was a moment that for most other people was filled with joy and hope for the future. When they had talked about this a few weeks back during their anniversary, Felicity had admitted being scared and not wanting to be hopeful yet. The pregnancy was a lot safer now, especially taking in consideration the multiple tests Felicity had let the doctor run on the baby. Still, neither of them had forgotten how much they had lost themselves and each other in the process of trying for a baby during their first try at marriage.

“I am sorry,” Felicity sobbed. “I know I promised I will be excited and hopeful once I am-“

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed her gently. He tightened his arms around her and kissed the side of her head. “Don’t. Don’t blame yourself for being scared.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, angling her head back to look at her. Her eyes were rimmed red and her cheeks wet from the tears that had fallen. Oliver put his hands to her cheeks, holding her face and gently swiping his thumbs over the wetness to dry her tears.

“Oliver, what do we do if something goes wrong?”

She put her hand onto her bump and tugged at Oliver’s hand to make it rest right next to his. He could feel their baby moving, and it made the ghost of a smile spreading on his lips. He never stopped looking at Felicity, though.

He knew that the usual response to a question like this was to tell her that everything was going to be alright. He knew his wife better than that, though. She had once told him that when she had been a kid and hadn’t known how to solve a task for school, her mother had told her that she should relax and take it easy. For Felicity, that answer had only been more frustrating because she hadn’t needed consolation but actual answers. It was the same for her now. She needed an actual answer to her questions and no promises that he knew he couldn’t keep.

“If something goes wrong,” Oliver whispered and felt his heart breaking a little at the implication that something might happen to their baby, “then we will survive this. We’ve been handed the opportunity of being parents, an opportunity we have long thought was out of our reach. This is a wonderful thing to happen to us, but it’s not what we need to be happy. We’ve been happy for the past five years even before we knew you were pregnant, right?”

“But it’s different now.” Felicity took in another sniffling breath, looking at one of the buttons of his shirt and playing with it to distract herself. “We went into the marriage, knowing having a baby was no subject anymore. Now this subject is reopened, and… well… losing a child is different than never having one in the first place.”

“Of course it’s different,” Oliver whispered, lifting her chin to make her look at him, “and I know we’d both be incredibly sad if anything happened to our baby. We’d be sad for a long time, sadder than when we thought we were never going to have a baby I guess. We will grieve our loss, and it will be a tough time, but I hope we have learned our lesson from our first try at marriage. I know I don’t want to live without you, so I hope we will make it through it even if something happens.”

Felicity looked at him for a long moment before she nodded and snuggled up to his chest. Oliver just held her close and kissed the crown of her head, hoping his words were all the answer she needed. It was hard to be honest without sounding unrealistic. He knew a lot of couples broke apart over the loss of a child. He refused to believe that something like that would happen to them, though. He had lost Felicity once. He didn’t want to do it again.

“Maybe we are lucky,” Felicity whispered eventually. “Maybe everything will turn out alright.”

Oliver smiled into Felicity’s hair. “Yeah, maybe we are lucky.”

God, he prayed they would be.

* * * * *

“He’s perfect, isn’t he?”

Oliver tried to answer to Felicity’s statement, confirming the obvious that their little boy was the most beautiful baby that had ever been born. He didn’t get a single word out, though. All he could do was looking at the baby who was sleeping peacefully in Felicity’s arms. He was beautiful and healthy and just perfect through and through.

Felicity rested her head against Oliver’s shoulder and smiled at Oliver. He could only see it from the corner of his eye since he was unable to look away from their baby boy right now. He smiled through the tears that were welling in his eyes and lifted his hand to his son’s chest, resting it right on his heart.

“The most perfect baby ever,” Oliver whispered eventually. Finally, he managed to turn his head and look at Felicity, smiling at her through the tears in his eyes. “Thank you.”

“For what?” she asked.

“For all of this.” Oliver took another look at their baby boy. “Especially for Benjamin of course.”

Felicity smiled softly and followed his gaze to their sleeping son. “Benjamin Archer Smoak-Queen, everything we wanted and never thought we’d have.”

“Yeah.”

A single tear rolled down Oliver’s cheek, and Felicity brushed it away with her thumb quickly. A breathy chuckle fell from Oliver’s lips, and he kissed Felicity’s temple gently.

“I don’t even know why I am crying.”

“Well, happy tears are always welcome,” Felicity told him. “We waited to be this lucky for years. I think once I have processed all the impressions of this day, I will cry my eyes out, too. I think I am too exhausted for that right now.”

Oliver smiled, snuggling his cheek to the top of Felicity’s head. “Do you need sleep? Should I call the nurse and-“

“No, not yet,” Felicity replied immediately. “I don’t want to sleep just yet. I want to continue looking at Benjamin for a little longer.”

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered. “I still can’t believe it’s all true. We really have a baby.”

“Yeah, we really have a baby.” Felicity angled her head back to look at Oliver. “Do you want to hold him once more?”

Oliver’s entire body was itching with the need to hold his son once more. The little boy was barely three hours old, and he had held him in his arms already, and of course he wanted to hold him again. Yet, he shook his head.

“Benjamin looks content where he is. I am going to use the time you are asleep later to cuddle him properly.”

“Sounds fair,” Felicity replied with a smile. She angled her head back to look at him once more. “I love you.”

Oliver smiled back at her. “I love you, too.”

Their lips met in a gentle kiss, sealing their declarations of love. A little sound of content that fell from Benjamin’s lips made them break the kiss and look at their newborn son. It was perfect.

\----->

Felicity smiled, continuing to stroke her hand through his short hair. Halfway through the story, his breathing had evened out and the tension had left his body. He looked relaxed now, peacefully asleep Felicity assumed, just like she had hoped he would. She was sure that he was feeling a lot better after some more hours of sleep.

Figuring she could use the opportunity to check on the kids, Felicity grabbed her phone from her nightstand and texted Tommy. He had volunteered to take the kids, and Felicity had trusted him with them easily because she knew how great he was with the kids. He hadn’t been back from the dead for very long yet, only a couple of months actually, but he had turned into the beloved Uncle Tommy, who wasn’t allowed to miss a single special occasion and was invited over for dinner or playtime regularly. Anyway, she knew how hard it was to handle the bunch, especially when they were excited like they certainly had been when Felicity had told them that they were going to have a slumber party at Tommy’s.

**F:** Everything alright at yours?

Tommy seemed to have waited for a text or a call because he sent his answer right back.

**T:** Everything is going great. Raisa, William, Emmy and my best buddy are cooking right now. Laurel and I weren’t appreciated in the kitchen. We are outside with Millie and Addie. How’s Oliver?

Felicity smiled at the little remark over her Tommy. The Tommies as Felicity liked to call the duo of uncle and nephew had grown impossibly close over the last months. Her little Tommy had never been much fond of people who weren’t her, but he did have a special bond with his new uncle.

**F:** He woke up. He was dizzy and sick, so he’s sleeping again now. Just text me if you need anything.

**T:** You do the same.

Felicity smiled. She had always known that, if there was a chance to have Tommy back, it would be a huge gain for Oliver. He could finally fix everything that had gone wrong between them and prove to him that he had changed and turned into a better person. Felicity hadn’t known what a gain Tommy Merlyn would be for the rest of the family until he had actually come back.

Felicity kissed the crown of Oliver’s head once more and leaned her head back into the fluffy pillow beneath it. With a sigh, she closed her eyes. The last hours since they had left the house for their mission had been exhausted for her too. She felt like she needed at least a day of sleep to recover from the stress and-

“Why Benjamin?”

At the muffled sound, Felicity opened her eyes and frowned. “What?”

“Why Benjamin Archer?” Oliver asked, his voice now clearer. “I know it’s the name we thought about when you were pregnant with Millie, but why?”

Felicity smiled. “I didn’t want to put myself into a situation where I had to chose between our kids, so I figured I used one we never had.”

She could feel Oliver smile against her chest. He sucked in a deep breath before he sighed with a mix of content and tiredness.

“I thought you had fallen asleep,” Felicity whispered eventually.

“No. I was thinking about that Oliver and Felicity and how lucky they got at the end.”

Felicity smiled. “Sometimes, you stop chasing after a dream, thinking you will never get it, and then the impossible happens.”

Oliver propped himself up onto his forearms. There was a wrinkle across his cheek where his skin might have been squashed. His eyes were reddened, looking incredibly tired. Yet, he was smiling.

“You mean the unthinkable?”

Felicity’s smile widened. She remembered very vividly how she and Oliver had talked at the shore of Lian Yu after they had locked Slade away in 2014. It was the day after Oliver had told her he loved her even though it had mainly been a ruse to fool Slade. The idea of the two of them together had been unthinkable back then. Yet, here they were ten years later, married with a house and a kid. Only the dog was missing for the picture-perfect family.

“Yeah, the unthinkable,” Felicity whispered.

She and Oliver smiled at each other for a moment. If someone had told either of them that they would end up with the life they had now back when Oliver had showed up at her office with his poor stories and big favors, they would have laughed. Oliver hadn’t believed he would ever find love with the life he had, and Felicity would have never thought a man like Oliver would fall in love with her. Yet, here they were.

“I like the story,” Oliver whispered, snuggling back to her chest with a sigh. “Now I want to hear the other two possible ends.”

“And here I thought I could get some rest too.”

“I was drugged which counts as being hurt, and now I am feeling sick. Two good reasons why I need exceptional care. A few bedtimes stories won’t hurt. Last week you told Emmy, Tommy, Millie and Addie each their own bedtime story and didn’t complain.”

“Easy, Honey,” Felicity said with a smile. “Don’t stress over it. I was just kidding anyway. Here we go with our second possibility.”

\----->

“That smells great.”

Oliver smiled back over his shoulder when Felicity wrapped her arms around his middle from behind and snuggled up to his back. Her face came to rest against his right shoulder blade and she pressed her nose against his back to breathe him in for a moment. He could feel her heartbeat, and it was without any doubt his favorite feeling in the world.

“It’s a new pasta recipe I have been working on for the past few days. I consider including it on the menu, but I could use another opinion.”

“Sounds great,” Felicity replied. “I’ll get the wine.”

“Already in the fridge.”

Felicity hummed contently, making Oliver smile. He loved spoiling her with these little things like making her dinner and getting a fitting bottle of wine from their small wine cellar or the store. He knew it wasn’t much, but he also knew it meant a lot to Felicity. That was all that matter anyway.

“You know, when we got remarried three ago and I suggested that we get our own house instead of moving back into the mansion, I thought we were going to live from love, vodka and takeout. If I had known that you’d discover your passion for cooking, I would have suggested getting our own place even during our first try at marriage.”

“Wanna know a secret?”

Oliver turned away from the stove and wrapped his arms around Felicity, holding her close to his chest. She was smiling at him with her eyes full of content. Oliver pecked her lips.

“Do you remember that evening we learned that Laurel was pregnant with Romy?”

Felicity nodded. “Sure. We had that terrible fight afterwards and-“

“Exactly that evening,” Oliver interrupted her. He didn’t want her to delve into that thought too much. Despite the three happy years of being remarried, sometimes it was still hard for them to think about the tragic way their first try at marriage had ended. There was no need and no good in going back and thinking about that again and again. “When I was out for my jog that morning, I was looking at the houses in my parents’ street. A lot of them were empty, and I thought to myself that it would be cool to have a place for our own there.”

Felicity chuckled. “Your idea of a place for our own and my idea of a place for our own is quite different, you know?”

“What? Because I was imagining a mansion that needs an intercom to talk to each other and you a cozy, little place like this?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “Exactly because of that. We would have had to steal Raisa from your parents years ago and not only now.”

“We are not stealing Raisa from them. We just had the better offer,” Oliver replied. “Besides, we are not sure she moves in with us yet.”

Felicity frowned. “Why? She already agreed.”

“Yes, but… we don’t know what the future brings.”

Oliver lowered his eyes a little, unable to look Felicity in the eyes. When they had decided to get remarried, they had actually decided to bury all plans for a baby. If it happened, it happened. They hadn’t planned on doing anything to force it, though. Despite that, Felicity had sat him down last year and told him that she wanted to apply for an adoption. Oliver had been surprised, but, after some consideration, he had finally agreed. During the ten months that they had been approved by the adoption agency, three mothers had chosen them to become the parents for their children. Two times they had arrived at the hospital only to learn that the mothers had chosen to keep the babies instead. Two times they had arrived at the hospital full of hope of having their greatest dream come true, and two times they had returned to their home with broken hearts and without a baby. The third mother was two weeks before the birth now, and Oliver couldn’t say he was particularly hopeful.

Felicity lifted his chin with the tips of her fingers, smiling at him comfortingly. “I am hopeful. It’s okay if you can’t be hopeful, though. I am just going to be hopeful for the both of us.”

Oliver looked at Felicity for a long moment before he kissed her forehead and hugged her close to his chest. “I just don’t want us to get hurt again. The last two times of losing a baby were hard already. I am not sure what happens if we lose another baby. I thought waiting for a positive pregnancy test without success was hard already, but this… this is a thousand times harder.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered, snuggling her cheek to his chest. “We just can’t lose hope, right?”

Oliver faltered. He had meant for this conversation to take place after dinner when he had prepared himself for it. Since Felicity was already addressing the subject, he couldn’t avoid it, though. Oliver turned off the heat of the cooktops and put the lids on the pots to keep the food warm before he turned back around to Felicity once more.

“Felicity, there is something I would like to talk about with you.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows with surprise. “Okay.”

“When we decided to try for adoption,” Oliver started slowly, “we both agreed that we have to be careful that what happened to us the last time when he tried to have a baby wasn’t going to happen again.”

Felicity frowned, putting her hand to his cheek. “Aren’t you happy anymore?”

Without any hesitation, Oliver framed her face with his hands and kissed her. His lips brushed against hers briefly for a few times before capturing them in a real kiss. Felicity sighed, and Oliver could almost feel Felicity relax against him.

“If there is one thing I don’t ever want you to think,” Oliver whispered, “then it’s that I am not happy every second I spend with you.”

Felicity smiled with relief, stroking her hands up and down his chest. “Good because I am very happy with you too.”

Their lips met in another kiss, a proof of how happy they still were with each other. After his proposal, they had gotten married relatively hurriedly. They had already known each other, so there had been no time needed for that. Over the last years, they had discovered themselves new, though. Felicity had realized her love for animals, so they had adopted a dog that was now snoring peacefully on the couch. Oliver had discovered his love for cooking, so he and Tommy had added a restaurant to their club. Despite the new explorations in both of their lives, their love for each other had only deepened.

“What I was trying to say is that I…” Oliver stopped for a moment before he cleared his throat. “Felicity, if this doesn’t work either and Eliza decides to keep her baby, I want the agency to take us out of their file. I… can’t go through losing another baby.”

“Oh.”

Oliver watched Felicity’s face fall for a moment, her eyes lowering to the neckline of his shirt that she played with nervously. She started at it intently, a strained frown spreading on her forehead. He gave her the time she needed. He had thought about this for weeks now, so he knew Felicity needed and deserved some time to think about it too.

He knew how difficult it had been for Felicity to agree to adoption. Oliver had never urged her to. They had both gone into this second try at marriage, thinking they would never have kids. Yet, Felicity’s desire to be a mom had overweighed her fear of trying other options than carrying their baby herself eventually. The two chances at adoption that had gone wrong in the last months had cost both of them a lot of strength. At some point during these last months after their latest setback, Oliver had figured that he couldn’t do this anymore. He couldn’t keep hoping for a baby, hearing it was born and healthy, only to be told that they wouldn’t be able to be the parents for the baby like they had hoped they would.

Much sooner than Oliver had expected, Felicity lifted her gaze to look at him, though.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Oliver asked. “Felicity, you can think about this. You don’t have to decide this right now and-“

“I don’t need time to think about this,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders. “I have thought about it before to be honest. I didn’t want to give up hope after I basically talked you into trying for adoption and-“

“You didn’t talk me into it. I wanted this as much as you.”

“But you would have never suggested this on your own. I was the one who broke the rule about trying for a baby.”

“We both agreed to this, though,” Oliver replied with a sigh, “and I hate to be the one backing out, but I can’t do this anymore and-“

Felicity put her fingers to his lips and shook her head, making him stop. Oliver grabbed her hand and snuggled his face into her hand.

“Back the night we got divorced and you proposed to me again, you proved that you wanted to stand with me despite everything. Even though I didn’t want any other options to have a baby, you wanted to be with me. Now it’s my turn. If this doesn’t work, we will stop trying to adopt. We’ve been happy just the two of us so far, so why won’t we be in the future?”

“Are you sure?” Oliver asked.

Felicity smiled, nodding her head. “Absolutely.”

With a relieved sigh, Oliver wrapped his arms around Felicity’s shoulders and pulled her closer to him, kissing her head. He had been worried that him backing out would confront their marriage with another one of those irreconcilable differences like the one that had led to their divorce. He had lost Felicity once, and he knew he couldn’t do it again. He couldn’t hope for and lose another baby either, though.

“You are right,” Felicity whispered. “We’ve been happy with our two-people-family as it is. We will be happy with it in the future, too.”

“I hope so,” Oliver admitted with a sigh. “I really hope so and-“

“Sorry,” Felicity whispered when her phone beeped. She took a few steps back to where her phone was put on the kitchen counter and grabbed it. She only shot a brief glance at the display before she lifted her gaze to look at him with nervous eyes. “It’s Janet.”

Oliver felt his heart stop beating. Janet was the nice social worker who was responsible for their application of adoption. She had been the one to introduce them to the three birthmothers and who had had to tell them that it wasn’t going to work out the last two times. Oliver didn’t know if it was a good sign or a bad sign that she called now. Eliza, the birthmother of the baby they hoped to be parents for, hadn’t been interested in a lot of contact yet. They had met her once to get to know her. Two days later, Janet had called and told them Eliza wanted them to adopt her baby. She didn’t want any further contact to them or their baby, though. Well, maybe she had changed her mind on that.

“Hi, Janet,” Felicity said taking the call.

She turned away from Oliver, and he turned to the stove, busying him with the food that was all ready actually. He didn’t want to see the moment their hopes and dreams were going to crush once more. The last two times had been hard enough as it is.

“Oh, okay.”

Oliver pressed his lips together and squeezed his eyes shut. He felt his stomach tightening at the thought that it was over once more. This was the third child they had lost. Though they had never held these babies and they hadn’t been legally theirs, they had loved all three of them. They knew Janet had always said that there was the risk that the birthmothers changed their mind. Going through that twice had been worse than Oliver had thought.

“And what does that mean?”

There was a fully furnished and decorated nursery upstairs right next to their bedroom. When they had had contact with the first birthmother that had chosen them to become parents for her baby, they had gotten it ready for their baby to live there. When the agreement had been canceled, they had given everything away to welfare. They had done the same when they had had contact with the second birthmother, and that agreement had been canceled. When Felicity had suggested getting the nursery ready this time around, Oliver had hesitated. Putting everything away and letting the welfare organization pick the stuff up had been just as painful as Janet telling them that they wouldn’t get the baby. He couldn’t go through that again, and he doubted Felicity could. They would ask their friends to put everything away this time.

“Yes, of course.” Oliver could hear Felicity suck in a deep breath. “No, no, I’m- I’m just a little bit in shock. I- I’m sorry.”

Oliver didn’t know if Felicity had to apologize for being speechless. This situation was impossible for either of them to endure. It was nobody’s fault, though. It wasn’t their fault. It wasn’t Janet’s fault. It wasn’t the birthmothers’ faults. It was just a situation that triggered a lot of emotions.

“Thank you, Janet.”

Oliver held his breath, waiting for Felicity to say anything. The open living area filled with silence, though. Oliver put his hands to the counter, straightening his arms and letting his head hand between his shoulders.

“Oliver?”

“I know I should hug you now,” Oliver said. “I will. I just need ten seconds because I really can’t be strong right now and-“

“Oliver.”

It sounded less than a question now. Oliver sucked in a deep breath before he turned around to face her. The expression on Felicity’s face was unreadable.

“I am sorry, Felicity,” he whispered. “I should have never agreed to adoption or-“

“Oliver, our baby was born today.”

Oliver stopped. “What?”

“Eliza called Janet from a hospital in Florida. She was visiting her mother there when she went into labor. The baby was born this afternoon. Eliza doesn’t want to come back to Starling if possible, so Janet is already at the airport. Eliza will sign the papers the day after tomorrow. Then the baby will be given into our care, and the adoption process can begin.”

Oliver stared at Felicity speechlessly, trying to process her words. His brain refused to make sense of the information she had given him, though. He was in shock like she had been according to her own words at the phone.

“What?”

Felicity chuckled, tears welling in her eyes. She stepped towards Oliver and framed his face with her hands. Her thumbs stroked through his short stubble.

“Oliver, we will get this baby,” Felicity said. “This baby will live with us. We will be her parents. Eliza told Janet that she really wants us to be the baby’s parents.”

Finally, the words seemed to hit home for Oliver. The joy that suddenly spread in his chest pushed away all the disappointment and fear of the last months.

“We’re having a baby!” he called out, wrapping his arms around Felicity’s baby and swiping her off her feet. “We are having a baby!”

Felicity chuckled, wrapping her arms around his neck so tightly that Oliver almost had a little bit trouble breathing. He didn’t mind, though. He and Felicity were really going to have a baby. After all this time, their greatest dream would come true. He knew in the back of his mind that Eliza could still change her mind, but that didn’t matter right now. All that mattered right now was that he and Felicity were at least given the chance to become parents. Maybe this time it would finally work.

When Oliver put Felicity back to the floor, he framed her face with his hands and captured her lips in a firm kiss. He knew he and Felicity hadn’t necessarily needed a baby to be happy. There were happy and would have stayed happy, but a baby just made it all more perfect.

“Okay, what- what did Janet say?” Oliver asked as soon as their lips parted. “What- Is it a girl or a boy? Is the baby healthy? When will we get to see him or her? How is Eliza? Is she alright? Does she really not want any contact? Do we-“

“Okay, wait, wait, wait,” Felicity asked with a chuckle. “So, in order of your questions, here are the answers Janet has given me. The baby is a girl. She is absolutely healthy. We will get to see her either when Janet brings the little girl to us or when we go to Florida to see her there. Eliza is exhausted, but she is okay. Janet wants to talk to her again to figure out what she wants which brings me to my request because I would like to go to Florida to see our little girl and to get the chance to talk to Eliza and thank her and make sure she really is okay and-“

“I am going to call my dad and ask for the private jet.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Oliver replied without hesitation. “I would have suggested to leave the moment I understood that we are really having a baby if it wasn’t for how nervous I am.”

Felicity chuckled, her nervousness showing now too. “I feel like my heart is trying to jump out of my chest.”

“In that case it’s because it wants to dance with mine because I feel the same way.”

They looked at each other quietly for a long moment, the meaningfulness of the moment shining in both of their eyes.

“I love you,” Felicity whispered.

Oliver smiled. “I love you too.”

Their lips met in a gentle, unhurried kiss. They were two – three with the dog – today. When they came back from Florida, there would be another family member. They’d have everything they always wanted.

“I will call my dad because of the jet.”

“I will call Thea and ask if she can take Goliath.”

\----->

“Goliath?”

“Our dog,” Felicity replied.

“Our dog’s name is Goliath?”

Oliver screwed up his nose as he looked at her. At some point during the story he had given up on trying to fall back asleep. He had actually started fighting it, resting his chin on the top of Felicity’s chest and looking at her while she was telling the story. Felicity knew he didn’t want to fall asleep before the three ends were told.

“Yes, Goliath.”

“Like the bad guy in David and Goliath?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “So?”

“I don’t want our dog’s name to be Goliath. I really hope we had a better name for our daughter.” Oliver sighed and snuggled his cheek against her chest for a moment. “What do you think would have happened with them? How would the story continue?”

Felicity chuckled. “Honey, this is the end to a story.”

“But it sounds more like a beginning, so there are questions open. Besides, this story felt a lot shorter than the first one,” Oliver told her. “So, what would have happened in Florida?”

“Well, I guess we would have gotten to know our daughter. We would have held her and enjoyed our first moments with her. Eventually, I would have handed her to you and gone to Eliza. She would have been sad and scared about her decision, but she would have really thought that it was what was best for the baby. After some talk, she would have eventually decided that she wanted some photos every three months, and we would have agreed. She would want to say goodbye, and we would all spend a day together, so the baby had time to get used to us and say goodbye to his mom.”

“And what name would we have given to her?”

“You really want me to pick a name?”

“Actually no. Forget I asked. I will just hate the name.”

Felicity chuckled, stroking her hand through his hair once more. Girls’ names had always caused trouble between them.

“You are quite ungrateful for someone who gets bedtime stories like a child.”

“I was drugged and feel sick. I deserve to be wrapped up in cotton wool.”

“Aw, my poor baby,” Felicity whispered and kissed the top of his head. “Besides, the story was shorter, so you can finally fall asleep.”

“I don’t want to fall asleep yet,” Oliver grumbled. “I want more stories.”

“I should text Quentin that the drug causes the behavior of a tired five-year-old.”

“Hey, you are not alone to be mean to me when I am hurt and sick,” Oliver complained. “Do I get my third story now?”

“Are you going to complain about my choices of names and the length of the story again?”

Oliver grinned cheekily. “Tell me the third end and test it.”

Felicity rolled her eyes with a chuckle. “Okay, here we go.”

\----->

A gust of wind made Felicity snuggle back against his chest and into his arms more. The wind was warm, but it felt a little cool against the warm sand they sat in and the warm water that splashed against their naked feet whenever the waves pushed it into their direction. The sun was already going down, but it still spent pleasant warmth. It was a beautiful sight and with the woman he loved in his arms it was the perfect moment.

Oliver tightened his arms around Felicity’s waist and lowered his head to the crook of her neck. His lips brushed against her pulse point, and she angled her head to the side in response, giving him more access. Oliver continued kissing her neck, nuzzling her skin at the same time. He breathed her in, enjoying the flowery perfume that mixed with the salty smell of the ocean and the sweet scent beneath that was all her. When he reached the edge of her jaw, Felicity turned her head. Their eyes met, and they both leaned in for a kiss, smiling into it.

Sometimes Oliver wondered how lucky he was. Asking Felicity to get married the very same day their divorce had officially been finalized had been a bolt shot. He hadn’t actually counted on it to work out. She had indeed taken her time to think about his answer. Only three weeks and several dates later she had agreed. Oliver didn’t mind that she had taken the time she had needed. He had ambushed her a little with his proposal, and only through taking the time she had needed had they been able to build something as strong as their marriage was now.

“Happy anniversary,” Oliver whispered when their lips parted before he pecked her lips once more. “Thanks for putting up with me.”

“Happy anniversary, Hon.”

Felicity smiled happily. She put her hand to his cheek and stroked her fingers through his stubble. Oliver loved when she did that. It was his favorite feeling in the world. He leaned his face into her touch with a content sigh.

“And I feel I should thank you for putting up with me.”

“Nah, I am more exhausting than you,” Oliver replied. He grinned at her. “Especially when I am hurt or sick.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

Oliver chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose. He had to admit that he did like to be babied by her every once in a while. Having her hold him and take care of him always cured every sickness and made every bruise hurt less. As long as she didn’t cook or bake for him, the world was perfect.

When Oliver realized the way that Felicity was looking at him, he perked up his eyebrows. Her eyes were focused on his intently, and it was almost like she tried to reach right into his soul.

“Are you content?”

“Content?” Oliver asked. “You mean happy.”

“No, I know that you are happy,” Felicity said and swiped her thumb over his bottom lip. “I just wonder if you are content with the way our life turned out.”

Oliver opened his mouth, already about to ask what she meant. If he was happy, for him that included or actually topped being happy, so why would she ask if he was content. Before the first syllable of his question had fallen from his lips, the meaning of her question suddenly caught up to him, though

“You mean because we don’t have kids?”

Felicity nodded. “We’ve been married for ten years now, and we still don’t have a baby.”

“Which I wasn’t expecting since I proposed to you in the very knowledge if you remember.”

“I know.” Felicity sighed, leaning her head against his shoulder and looking at the horizon. “Still, I wonder if you are content with that. When Nicolas and Romy were there last weekend, you looked very happy with them and-“

“I am content, Felicity,” he whispered. “I always told you it was more about having a baby with you than about having a baby at all. I am very happy with the way our life turned out to be. We can travel whenever we want because we are not depended on school vacations. We can have sex everywhere all day. I can run around naked all day-“

“Yeah, I told you like a hundred times that I really don’t like that?”

“Really?” Oliver asked, perking up his eyebrows and grinning widely. “Because your reaction says otherwise.”

Felicity puckered her lips and shot him a mocking look. Oliver grinned, wiggling with his eyebrows. Whenever he ran around naked, Felicity jumped him like they were still honeymooning.

“That’s exactly the problem,” Felicity grumbled. “It’s distracting.”

“Awww, poor thing,” Oliver replied. He leaned in and captured her lips in a teasing kiss. “I won’t stop, though.”

“Yeah, I didn’t think you would.”

Felicity sighed dramatically before they both chuckled. Oliver tightened his arms around her and snuggled his cheek to the top of her head.

“Really, Felicity, I couldn’t be more content or happier if we had kids. It would be great, sure, but our life now is great too. It would just be a different kind of great.”

Felicity sighed and nodded. “I actually think the same. It would be a different kind of great.”

“We have Laurel and Tommy who borrow us Nicolas and Romy every once in a while, and once Thea’s baby is born, I am sure she will be grateful for us to volunteer taking the baby sometimes.”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied, “you’re right. We are lucky with what we have given.”

“Exactly.” Oliver kissed her cheek. “Want to enjoy not having a child now?”

Felicity looked back over her shoulder with an incredulous expression in her eyes. “Here?”

“Sure.” Oliver grinned. “I am going to wash the sand out of your hair and belly button and wherever else it will end up later. I promise.”

Felicity pushed her tongue into her cheek before she looked left and right to make sure nobody else was there. With the giant mansion they had rented for their anniversary at the very same beach they had gotten married to each other ten years ago, there was nobody to be seen, though. She grinned cheekily.

“Who’s naked and in the water first wins?”

“And will serve the other breakfast in bed tomorrow?”

“Deal.”

He and Felicity jumped up. While Felicity started tossing away her clothes, Oliver just watched her. She was beautiful in the warm light of the dawning sun. She was always beautiful of course, but she was even more beautiful now. The rays of the sun shone through her blonde hair making it look like a halo and-

“Why aren’t you undressing?”

Oliver smiled. “I like to watch you.”

“Awww, that’s sweet.” Felicity stepped forward and pecked his lips. She quickly slipped out of her panties and dropped them into the sand then. As she ran into the ocean, she looked back over her shoulder. “But it means I win.”

“Yeah, you win.” Oliver smiled, only know starting to undress himself slowly. He whispered to himself, “Since I don’t have to eat the breakfast you made, I consider it a win for both of us, though.”

\----->

Felicity watched Oliver’s relaxed face. She wasn’t sure if he had really fallen asleep this time, but at least he hadn’t been able to fight his eyes falling shut anymore. Halfway through the story, he had allowed his eyes to stay shut. Every few seconds, his body jerked as if he had been right about to falling asleep.

“Go on.”

At least that seemed to answer the question where their kids had inherited their stubbornness not to fall asleep even when they were tired. Felicity sighed, stroking one hand through his hair and the other up and down his back.

“There is no going on. That’s the end of the story.”

“No, we are having sex in the ocean. I want that story.”

“No.”

“You are mean,” Oliver grumbled. “I also didn’t miss that you were mocking me in the story.”

“Oh, I was?” Felicity asked sheepishly.

“Yeah, you said I was exhausting when I was sick or hurt. That was mean.”

“Awww, poor baby.” Felicity chuckled and kissed the top of his head. “So, which story did you like most?”

Oliver sighed. He lifted his head to look at her for only a moment. His eyes were bloodlined and tired, though. He could barely keep them open for two seconds before he let his head almost fall against her chest with a deep sigh. For a brief moment, Felicity wondered if they should go to the hospital after all, but she knew it would only cause trouble, especially this short before the election. Felicity would call John and ask him to take another look at Oliver right tomorrow morning.

“I like the last one,” Oliver said eventually. “Would be even better with the sex, but that’s nice?”

“Yeah?” Felicity asked. “I liked the second one.”

“Because of the dog?”

“Because it’s realistic,” Felicity replied. “We found a compromise which means that I overcome my fear of adopting a baby and there is no miracle needed for it. It wasn’t easy. We had to endure some setback, but we made it through it. And we had a dog. Yes, that plays into it too. What do you like about the third end?”

“I like that we would be happy without kids, too. We have a huge family with a lot of kinds. It’s nice to know that we’d still be a family and happily married without them keeping us too busy to get into any huge fights.”

“That’s true,” Felicity whispered. “But let’s be honest. You like that scenario because you are the big hero of the story who made the sacrifice of relinquishing kids of your own to be with me. You just like to be my hero.”

“You sound like you want to say that you don’t consider me your hero as it is.”

“Try not getting hit with Vertigo for longer than eighteen months, and I might consider you being my hero again.”

Oliver slid down the bed a little and pushed his face into her stomach. He grumbled discontentedly, making Felicity smile. When he stayed like that, not moving anymore, Felicity frowned. She had expected an answer, but she guessed he had finally passed out.

As he was lying there peacefully, burying her body under his, Felicity smiled gently. She knew their life would be a lot easier if they weren’t trying to save the city. Oliver wouldn’t risk his life every night. He wouldn’t get bruised or drugged with an almost frightening routine. They could spend their evenings in front of the TV like probably every other American couple. Yet, Felicity knew that just wasn’t them. They weren’t the kind of people who could do that every night and leave the city to fall to pieces. Since Oliver had introduced her to his crusade, and they had turned it into something even greater with the help of John, they had become completely different people whose normality was the kind you usually read in comic books. Felicity had attempted being a hero with her hacktivism in college, but it had gone terribly wrong. She wasn’t sure that she had ever had a lifestyle like this – family, career and saving the city – if it hadn’t been for Oliver stepping into her life.

Felicity smiled and kissed the top of Oliver’s head. “Maybe you are my hero after all.”


	293. A rare request

Oliver kicked the door shut behind him and leaned back against it with a sigh, squeezing his eyes shut. He had thought that, with the election day coming closer, the work would get a little less. Apparently, he had been terribly wrong. His political strategist Alex and his assistant Becks chased him from one appointment to the other. They thought it was best to put some extra energy into his candidature now that they were so close to the finish line.

With another sigh, Oliver dropped his keys into the bowl on the small table next to the door and loosened his tie. It was almost a little bit ridiculous to put so much energy into the candidature when he was actually the only person who could be voted. He was going to be mayor no matter what. He could be partying all week – not that he was interested in that – and still Starling had had no choice because nobody was crazy enough to want that job.

Oliver rubbed his hands over his face. Of course he wanted to put as much energy and heart into his candidature as possible. The city and the people living here were important to him. He was just exhausted. Though it had been a week since he had been drugged with the new version of Vertigo, he was still getting tired so very quickly. He didn’t think the effects of the drug had completely ceased just yet.

“Daddy!”

When Emmy jumped up onto his arms, Oliver smiled. He hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek before he adjusted her position, so she pressed to his side comfortably. He tugged a curly strand of her blonde hair behind her ear.

“How was your day?” he asked.

“I’ve drawn a really cool picture. Raisa put it on the fridge.”

“That’s really cool,” Oliver said. “And what did you learn?”

Emmy puckered her lips briefly before she shrugged her shoulders. “Not much. School is boring.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered, nodding his head. “I always felt the same, but don’t let mommy hear.”

“Mommy’s not home yet.”

“Oh.” Oliver couldn’t hide his disappointment. He had been looking forward to wrapping his arms around her and kissing her. “And where is everyone else?”

“William is upstairs with Audrey. Tommy is with Uncle Tommy. Millie, Addie, Raisa and I are in the kitchen.” Emmy thought about her words for a moment. “I was in the kitchen before you came home.”

Oliver smiled and kissed her cheek. “Then let’s check on your little sisters, yes?”

Emmy nodded and struggled out of Oliver’s arms to run ahead into the kitchen. Oliver took in a deep breath, rubbing his hands over his face once more to chase away the tiredness before he followed after her.

“Daddy’s home!”

“Dada!”

Oliver smiled at how excitedly Addie was kicking her feet, making the entire high chair shake. Since she had learned her first word – _mama_ to Oliver’s disappointment – she had gained a vocabulary of eight words. _Dada_ had been the third word. It had followed directly after _puppy_. He was lucky it had been the third word as her forth had been _bed_ though it sounded more like _bat_ , and he didn’t want to come any place behind something that reminded even the slightest bit of Bruce.

“Hi, Princess,” he whispered. He stroked his hand over her hair and kissed the top of it. Addie angled her head back and smiled at him. “How was your day.”

“Oh, Ms. Adelaide had a wonderful day, didn’t you?”

Addie smiled at Raisa now, and Oliver chuckled. He had needed weeks to get Raisa to stop calling him and Felicity Mr. Oliver and Ms. Felicity. Sometimes it still slipped from her lips as an old habit, but she did feel at home here the way Oliver had hoped he would. It was the kids who had so much fun with being called Mr. and Ms. that Raisa called them that. If Emmy got to choose, she’d probably let herself be called _Her Royal Highness_ as it was an address worth a Queen as she liked to point out as a joke everyone once in a while.

Oliver turned to Millie, who was sitting at the table with her head resting on her arm. She was drawing halfheartedly, mostly doodling arbitrary lines on the paper. She didn’t look particularly tired or sad, but she seemed to be at least bored. Oliver kneeled beside her rubbed his hand up and down her back gently.

“Hey, Millie.”

“Hi, Daddy.”

“Are you alright?” he asked in a whisper, so only she could hear.

Millie nodded, not lifting her head off her arm. Oliver puckered his lips. He always wondered if Millie got enough attention. Unlike her siblings, she really was an easy child. She was always content, barely ever dissatisfied. While that was quite pleasant for Felicity and him most of the times it did make them consider if Millie got the attention her siblings got rather often. Since she never demanded any attention herself and her position in the family with Addie following only a year after her, it was easy to miss Millie’s needs. It was why Oliver and Felicity always kept an extra eye on her.

“Should we all play a game together after dinner?” Oliver asked. “You can pick which one.”

“Millie story.”

“You want a story?”

Millie nodded. “Story.”

“Okay, so we after dinner, we will all read a story together and-“

“Dada and Millie.”

“Just the two of us?”

Millie nodded. “Dada and Millie.”

Oliver smiled and glanced at his watch. It was going to take at least an hour before they’d have dinner. He wouldn’t mind some rest, so they could sneak upstairs into bed and read a story now too.

“Should we go now?” When Millie nodded excitedly, Oliver smiled. He lifted her into his arms and kissed her cheek. “Then come on.”

“Where are you going?” Emmy asked.

“Millie and I want to read a story upstairs.”

“Can I come with you?”

“No,” Millie replied with grumpy voice, snuggling her head against Oliver’s shoulder. “Dada and Millie.”

Emmy looked at her daddy, asking with wide eyes if her little sister was going to get her will. Oliver shot her a soothing look.

“Someone’s gotta help Raisa with cooking.”

Emmy shrugged her shoulders. “Okay.”

“Thanks, Sweetie.”

Oliver smiled gratefully. He knew Emmy could be quite demanding, but she had learned to understand that her siblings needed a piece of their parents as well. She’d forget about this conversation as soon as Oliver and Millie were upstairs.

“Okay, daddy is going to put on some comfy clothes,” Oliver said, throwing Millie onto the mattress playfully so she bumped up and down. “Do you want to pick a book in the meantime?”

Millie nodded and quickly crawled off the mattress. Oliver watched her running out of the room, her naked feet slapping onto the hardwood floor and her butt with the thick diaper wiggling a little. He couldn’t believe that she was two years old already. Time had passed by. He felt that way about all of his kids, but with Millie and Addie it seemed particularly weird.

With a sigh, Oliver turned to the dressing room. He took of his suit, letting everything fall to the floor carelessly, and put on some sweatpants. He already grabbed his shirt to put it on. Smiling, he remembered how the kids had still been babies and he had loved to have them lying on his naked chest. For Addie, it had even been requested in the hospital since she had had trouble holding her temperature. He put the shirt back and got back to the bedroom just when Millie returned.

“What you got there?” Oliver asked. “Did you bring your pajamas?”

Millie pulled the pacifier she must have gotten from her crib out from between her lips. “Milly comfy clothes.”

“That’s fair. And what book did you decide on?”

Oliver sat down on the bed with slightly spread legs. Millie stepped between them and handed Oliver both, her pajamas and the book. With a sweet smile, she snuggled her cheek against his thigh. Oliver smiled and tipped the tip of his finger against her nose, making her giggle.

“The Little prince?” Oliver asked with perked up eyebrows. “That’s a nice book, but are you sure it’s for you? Where did you find it?”

“Emmy,” Millie replied.

“Yeah, and Emmy is a little older than you. Are you sure you want to read this?”

Millie nodded. “Yes.”

Oliver smiled. “Okay, then we’ll read this.”

“First pajamas.”

“Of course. First I’ll help you putting on the pajamas.”

Oliver did as he had said. He changed Millie into her pajamas and slid back until his back was resting against the pillows. He beckoned for Millie to join him, and she lost no time doing so. Within ten seconds, Millie lay on her back next to him, her head resting on his shoulder. Oliver kissed her temple before he opened the book.

“Ready?” he asked.

Millie nodded. She pushed the pacifier back between her lips and looked at the book excitedly.

“Once when I was six years old I saw a magnificent picture in a book, called True Stories from Nature, about the primeval forest. It was a picture of a boa constrictor in the act of swallowing an animal. Here is a copy on the drawing.”

“Why?”

“Why what?” Oliver asked, looking at Millie. “Why does the snake eat the other animal?”

Millie nodded. “Yeah.”

“Well, I guess the snake is hungry.”

Again, Millie nodded. He waited if she had further questions, but it didn’t seem that way. He kissed the top of her head once more before he continued reading the story. Millie stayed quiet most of the time, just asking a question here and there. It was really comfortable like this and, after the long day and his latest Vertigo experience, it was exactly what he had needed. When something happened in the field, it always reminded him of how precious time was and-

When Oliver was close to falling asleep, Millie gently slapped his cheek.

“Sorry,” Oliver said with raspy voice. “Where was I?”

“Sheep,” Millie replied.

“Right.” Oliver squeezed his eyes shut a few times until some of the tiredness was gone. “Draw me a sheep!”

 

 

When Felicity went upstairs to get into some more comfortable clothes and get Millie and Oliver to join them downstairs for dinner, she found the two soundly sleep in their bed. Millie was lying on Oliver’s chest. He was still holding the book.

They were incredibly sweet like that. Felicity was tempted to lean into the door and just watch them for an hour or two. She knew Oliver would eventually wake up, though, and he really shouldn’t wake up right now. After the Vertigo-attack last week, he could need every sleep he could catch.

Felicity tiptoed to the bed and pulled the blanket over her two loved ones. Millie didn’t move the slightest, still fast asleep. Felicity kissed her head. She turned to Oliver and stroked her fingers through his hair.

“Glad you’re home,” Oliver whispered without waking up.

Felicity smiled. Of course, even in his sleep he knew she was there. It warmed her heart and would never cease to amaze her. He was so aware regarding her. Felicity brushed her lips against his forehead.

“Sleep tight, Hon.”

“Already sleeping.”

Felicity chuckled quietly. “Yeah, already sleeping.”

Without changing into more comfortable clothes, she tiptoed back out of the room and closed the door behind herself as quietly as possible. Oliver and Millie needed some rest. Since William had headed out with Audrey, and Tommy was still with Uncle Tommy, Felicity had Emmy and Addie all for herself which was not something that happened often, either. It was going to be fun.


	294. An impossible choice

“I am tempted to propose to you once more.”

Felicity smiled and took a sip of her champagne, enjoying the way the prickling liquid ran down her throat. Without looking at Oliver, she leaned back against his chest a little more. “Don’t you think three weddings have been enough?”

Oliver brushed his lips against the side of Felicity’s neck, and her head fell back against his shoulder with a sigh. Her fingers sought out his on her waist where they moved against the small parts of her skin that were exposed thanks to the cutouts of her dress. Meanwhile, Oliver’s lips moved up the side of her neck to her ear.

“Never enough,” he whispered.

Felicity kept her eyes straight forward for a moment before she angled her head back to look at Oliver’s face. He was watching the newlyweds as Felicity had done, his eyes full of nostalgic memories of their three weddings. Even without being able to read his mind, Felicity knew that was what he was thinking about. He looked beautiful. Felicity knew that a lot of people didn’t like to call men beautiful, but Oliver was. Felicity couldn’t remember how many times she had been lying in bed, watching Oliver sleep and thinking to herself what a beautiful man he is. He was a masterpiece.

Eventually, Oliver turned his head, looking over her head at something behind her. Felicity assumed it was where William was standing. Before Felicity could follow Oliver’s gaze, though, he already lowered his eyes from the top of her head to her eyes. Their eyes met briefly, and they both smiled.

When they redirected their focus to the dancefloor, Felicity sighed almost inaudibly. She watched Samantha and Eric swaying in time with the music slowly. Samantha was wearing a short, tight-fitting dress. Eric was dressed in a black suit. They looked nice together, happy and very much in love.

Oliver was right. It did remind her of their three weddings a little bit. For a moment, she wondered which her favorite wedding had been, but she knew she would never be able to decide. Each wedding had been special in its own way. The first wedding had been the first, so it would forever hold a special place in her heart, no matter what. The second wedding had been the renewal of their vows after their first real crisis during her pregnancy depression. The third wedding had been the most intimate, just them and the kids in Bali. They had all been perfect, all in their own way.

“Are you thinking about our weddings?” Oliver whispered into her ear.

Felicity nodded. “I do.”

“And what exactly are you thinking?”

“That all our weddings have been pretty amazing.”

“Yes, they were.” Oliver leaned his head against the top of Felicity’s. “It’s why it wouldn’t hurt to add a forth to the list.”

Felicity chuckled and slapped his chest lightly. “Don’t be silly.”

“Hey, I am being serious here.”

A few years ago, Felicity was sure she would have blushed and bitten down on her bottom lip at his words. Realizing that Oliver loved her so much that he casually proposed another wedding to her would have definitely caused some nervousness a while back. Over the years, these signs of insecurity as well as her insecurities themselves had gotten less and less, especially when she was around Oliver. She knew what she meant to him, and she knew that there was nothing that she had to be embarrassed about when he was around.

“I know you are serious,” Felicity said gently. She stroked her hand over his once more. “But I think after three weddings, it’s time to give the others the opportunity to get married. You know, they should have the chance to be as happy as we are.”

“We gave Thea and Roy the opportunity to,” Oliver replied, “and they took it. Lyla and John got married before us. Who else is there?”

“Oh, let me think,” Felicity whispered, not wanting to disturb the couple’s first dance. “Laurel and Tommy.”

“They are not even together yet.”

“Not yet,” Felicity pointed out his own words, but she waved it off. Laurel and Tommy had a long way ahead of them before even just considering a relationship was in reach. Felicity knew they both wanted it, but it was just too difficult right now. “Fine, we have Quentin and my mom.”

“They talk about marriage?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “They don’t talk about it, but it’s a possibility.”

The thought made Felicity smile. She knew that her mother had found the love she had always wanted and deserved in Quentin. He was the one for her. He was everything Felicity had always wished for her mother, everything and more to be honest. She’d be happy if they got married, and she knew her mother had always wanted to get married. She wanted a real wedding with Jewish wedding traditions and a long, white dress. With a frown, Felicity realized that she had never had any Jewish tradition on either of her weddings. Getting married to Oliver had always been more important than any traditions.

“Anyway, we also have Iris and Barry.”

“I don’t think they are ready yet.”

“Caitlin and Ronnie.”

“There you got me.”

Felicity chuckled. Luckily, the sound was drowned by the applause the couple received as their first dance ended. Felicity quickly joined in, watching the newlyweds kiss each other gently, before she turned around to Oliver and pecked his lips.

“Maybe one day.”

Oliver smiled. “That’s all the answer I need.”

His lips brushed against hers once more, kissing her with a gentleness that made Felicity lean against his chest and wrap her arms around his middle. She could kiss him all day every day, and it would never be enough.

“So, Mrs. Queen,” Oliver said when their lips parted, “how would you feel about a dance?”

“Maybe later.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows in surprise. “Maybe later? There was a time that you dragged me on the dancefloor whenever you got the chance. Too much champagne?”

“No,” Felicity replied hurriedly and emptied the rest of her glass. “These new shoes are killing me, though. I could need a moment to sit down and get them some rest. Besides, I’d like to text Raisa and check how the kids are doing.”

“I am sure she got it handled.”

“Still,” Felicity said as they walked back to their table. “Addie was a little grumpy when we left. I just want to make sure she’s asleep. By the way, you have no right to lecture me. When Emmy was a baby, you were the nightmare of every babysitter and with babysitter I mean our friends because they were the only ones we trusted our baby with.”

“And she never had a bump or a scratch,” Oliver said. “Besides, I wasn’t trying to lecture you. I was just trying to calm you down.”

“I am calm. I just want to make sure the kids are fine, so I can be even calmer.”

Chuckling, Oliver pushed Felicity’s chair back for her and adjusted it when she sat down. He kissed the top of her head briefly before he sat down on the chair next to her. Her hands were already reaching out for her purse to take her phone, but Oliver laced his fingers with hers and kissed the back of her hand. Felicity’s eyes met Oliver’s, and they smiled at each other.

“Do you want another drink?” Oliver asked her.

“Not now. I am actually kind of tired.”

“Come here.”

He turned her chair a little, so her back was turned towards him, and put his arm around her shoulders from behind until she leaned back against his chest. Her head came to rest against his shoulder with a sigh. Felicity closed her eyes, enjoying the rest for her feet, her eyes and her back. With the kids being quite hyper this morning and the wedding this afternoon, it had been a long day.

“We will wait a few songs and excuse ourselves,” Oliver whispered into her ear. “We have four kids at home, so there is no better excuse.”

“Sounds great.”

Felicity smiled, not opening her eyes. She couldn’t wait to get out of these shoes and this dress, so she could put on something comfier or maybe just fall into bed nakedly. She could really need some good hours of sleep.

With a frown, she opened her eyes. She didn’t even have to seek out William. She found him immediately. He had left Audrey’s side to dance with his mother. They both looked a little tense though they were smiling and chatting lightly.

“Do you think we should stay longer?” Oliver asked Felicity, knowing exactly what was going through Felicity’s mind. “For William?”

William was the main reason why Oliver and Felicity had been invited to Samantha’s wedding. The four of them – Oliver, Felicity, Samantha and now Eric – had found a firm ground to base their shared care for William on. After everything that had happened, the insecurities that had come with Oliver’s and Samantha’s messed-up past and the imbalance of power it had caused at the start, had nipped any chance of a friendship between these four in the bud, though. They took care of William together. That was the reason and the limit to their contact. Oliver and Felicity wouldn’t have been invited to the wedding if it hadn’t been for William. He wasn’t particularly fond of his mother’s new husband, so Samantha had asked Oliver and Felicity to come to the wedding, so William had someone to support him if he needed it.

Felicity watched William intently once more. He still looked tense, but she wouldn’t say that he looked like he wanted to escape the whole scene. Felicity knew that he wasn’t particularly fond of Eric. She had talked to him about it a few times in the two years since he was with Samantha. She knew there was no particular reason why he didn’t like Eric. He was a good guy, William had pointed that out several times. He just hadn’t become comfortable with him. Maybe it was just missing appeal.

“I think he’s getting along,” Felicity said eventually. With a sigh, she continued looking at mother and son. “It had to be a tough decision for her to decide whether or not to accept the proposal given William’s aversion for Eric.”

Oliver hummed lowly which made Felicity angle her head back to look at him. He had his lips puckered, looking at William and Samantha with slightly narrowed eyes. He knew that Felicity was looking at him, he always knew, so Felicity didn’t say anything. He seemed to be in need of a moment to think through his thoughts before voicing them.

“Eric is a good guy. William just doesn’t like him which is irrational, or at least it has nothing to do with Eric,” Oliver said. “Samantha had no reason to decide against getting married to him.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows with surprise. “Is this your experience with precipitous judgement regarding stepfathers speaking?”

“You mean because I wasn’t too fond when I learned about my mother getting married to Walter?”

“ _I didn’t realize you wanted to sleep with my mother, Walter_ ,” Felicity quote the sentence she knew Oliver had hurled at Walter his first evening back in the mansion. “I think it’s a little underestimated to say that you were not that fond.”

“I was… surprised,” Oliver said. For a moment, he looked like he wanted to grin about this memory, but instead he frowned. “I didn’t understand. My father had been dead for five years, but it felt like two days to me.”

Felicity smiled and put a hand on his cheek. “I know. Besides, you did learn to like Walter.”

“Absolutely.” Oliver smiled and brushed his lips against Felicity’s. When he leaned back, he explained, “It was not a son learning his mother got married again that was speaking. It was a happily married man who learned he had a teenage son.”

“You thought about what you would have done if William hadn’t liked me?”

Oliver sighed, nodding his head. “Before you two met each other, I was always wondering about it. I know that the situation, regardless of what Samantha did or I did to make it even harder, was difficult. William didn’t know me, and I didn’t know him. Yet, he was growing into my family, the family I had with you and Emmy and Tommy at that time.”

“Yeah.” Felicity sighed. “There was the danger of him turning into the classic stepchild.”

Felicity knew that she and Oliver had always done their best to treat William as a child equal to the ones they had together. They hadn’t wanted for him to turn into a child of second class in the family. Still, there had been a risk that William would grow a feeling of isolation since, unlike his siblings, he wasn’t Oliver’s and Felicity’s child.

“I was worried that he might not like you. I mean… I still think it’s impossible not to like you, but-“

“-you are a biased.”

“A little.” Oliver shot her a brief look, and they both started chuckling. “Anyway, if William hadn’t liked you, it wouldn’t have changed anything. Even if we hadn’t had children together at that time yet, I wouldn’t have left you. You know me. I am an advocate for listening to your child’s needs and wishes. I just think there are limits to it. You are a great person, loving and understanding and a million more things. If William, for some reason, wouldn’t have liked you, it wouldn’t have changed my feelings towards you. Unless you wouldn’t have treated him like crap which I knew you wouldn’t because I know you, I wouldn’t have left you. Hence, I don’t expect it from Samantha. I just think that you can’t end a relationship that means something to you for your child without any good reason.”

Felicity sighed. “You’re right.”

“What was that?”

“I am not going to repeat it,” Felicity said, shooting him a teasing look. They both chuckled. “I am sure William wouldn’t have wanted Samantha to end the relationship anyway. He’s happy for her.”

“Besides, with living at our place, he doesn’t have to see Eric that often anyway.”

“Right.” Felicity looked at Oliver. “I am just really happy that William actually does like me.”

“Of course he does.” Oliver kissed her head. “His life is a lot better because you are in his life. You inspired him. You helped him to get to that school. You-“

“I wasn’t implying that he doesn’t like me,” Felicity said, rubbing her hand up and down Oliver’s thigh. “I just think we are lucky. There could have been a lack of appeal between William and me, too. This way it’s a lot easier.”

“Right.” Oliver pecked her lips. “I suggest I will go to the men’s room. After that, we will dance together. Then, we will go home, I will rip this dress off you and we redo our wedding night.”

Felicity smiled. “Sounds good. I will check in with Raisa to make sure our kids are all fast asleep and won’t get in the way of our plans.”

“Good plan.” Oliver pecked her lips once more. “See you in two minutes.”

As soon as Oliver started walking away, Felicity grabbed her purse and pulled out her phone to text Raisa.

**F:** Oliver & I are heading home soon. Everything alright with the kids?

Raisa – bless her heart! – of course knew that Felicity usually texted her at least once whenever they were away. Whether QI, Oliver’s candidature, their secret identities or any other appointments chased them out of the house late during the day, Felicity always asked how the kids were doing and if they were in bed. Stable hours of sleep had always been important in raising the kids.

**R:** Everyone is fast asleep. Ms. Adelaide needed a little time, but she is asleep now too.

Felicity sighed with relief and pushed her phone back into her purse. She had known that Raisa got it handled, but she still liked to know what her kids were doing and if they were sleeping. Especially Tommy and Addie weren’t that easy to put to bed and-

“Hey.”

Felicity looked up and smiled with surprise when she was William. Since his change of voice, he was even sounding like his dad. For a split second, she had really believed it was Oliver.

“Hi,” Felicity said. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine. I am happy for my mom.”

Felicity cocked her head. “You know you can tell me if it’s different, right?”

William shrugged his shoulders with a sigh. “I already have a stepmom I love. It’s okay to have a stepdad that I am just okay with.”

Felicity smiled and squeezed William’s hand. “I love you too.”

William smiled and held out a hand. “Would you dance with me?”

“I get a dance before Audrey?”

William chuckled. “I think she’s a little nervous. She can’t dance.”

“In that case,” Felicity said and put her hand into William’s, “I am going to make sure I look particularly clumsy on the dance floor.”

“I am sure that is going to help.”

William led Felicity to the dance floor. They danced to the slow music, chatting about the wedding. They had fun. It wasn’t long until William grinned and nodded to one of the other dancing couples. Felicity followed his eyes to see Oliver and Audrey dancing together.

“Good thing dad is used to pain,” William said with a chuckle. “I am sure she will step on his feet more than once.”

“Don’t worry. Your dad can take it. Besides, Oliver isn’t the best dancer himself.”

“I heard that, Honey,” Oliver said next to them.

“Mr. Queen is actually very good at dancing,” Audrey said. “Really, you are, Mr. Queen.”

“Thank you very much, Audrey, but please just call me Oliver. We talked about that.”

Audrey smiled. “Right. Sorry, Oliver.”

He winked at her, making Felicity roll her eyes at him. Oliver couldn’t stop being the charming and hot dad. He loved knowing that girls still fell for his strong body and his deep blue eyes.

Once the song ended, the four of them stepped together.

“So, after you stole the first dance with my wife and I got my revenge with Audrey,” Oliver said to William, “I’d suggest we switch back to the women of our hearts.”

“I guess that’s the gentle way of _Take your hands off my wife, idiot_?”

“The very gentle way.”

Oliver quickly pushed himself between William and Felicity. His arms wrapped around Felicity’s waist as he lifted her off the floor a few inches and kissed her. Like that, he danced them away from William and Audrey. Felicity could just chuckle against his lips. She loved all of Oliver’s ways to tell other men to take their hands off his wife. It was completely unnecessary, but she couldn’t help it. Besides, she did have some creative ways to tell other women to take or rather keep their hands off her husband too, and she knew how much he enjoyed watching that.


	295. Straight wrist and sharp mind

Felicity knew exactly how she wanted the rest of her day to go. Once she was home, she would run herself a bath and relax in the hot water with closed eyes for at least thirty minutes. She was sure that was the best she could do to get in the right mental state for her week off. After her bath, she’d slip into some comfy clothes, preferably one of Oliver’s shirts and a pair of her leggings and try to convince the kids to cuddle with her on the couch. If they didn’t want to, she would have to offer pizza for hugs.

When the elevator doors opened in the parking area, Felicity released a deep sigh. Apparently, the lights still hadn’t been repaired. More than half of them weren’t working, leaving the area in darkness mostly. She would text her assistant Emily later to make sure she reminded the facility manager to take care of this. Felicity had mentioned the missing light several times in the last two days, and the facility manager had promised to take care of it. She guessed something had gotten in the way which, of course, could always happen, but she really didn’t want anyone to get hurt here.

Using her phone’s display for light, she started walking to her car. Now that she had thought about pizza, she realized how hungry she was. She was starving for dinner, and a pizza with double cheese sounded like heaven right now. She had had a salad Raisa had made her for lunch which was certainly healthy enough to convince Oliver that she deserved pizza for dinner. Besides, her week off was a reason to celebrate, and celebrations called for unhealthy food. She was sure he could overlook one-

When Felicity heard steps in the darkness, her thoughts came to a sudden stop. She wasn’t paranoid. Despite everything she had seen and knew was possible through her Arrow work and through being married to a man who had been shipwrecked for five years, she still believed that there was good in the world. There were criminals waiting behind a lot of corners, just not behind every corner. When she heard loud noises, she didn’t assume those were shots fired at her. When she heard steps behind her, she didn’t jump to the conclusion that someone was following her. Still, something told her that the steps that weren’t hers were there because someone was following her.

After a moment of hesitation, Felicity stood still. She couldn’t say she was surprised when the steps that weren’t hers came to a stop too. Felicity puckered her lips. She was sure that she had heard two pair of feet behind her. Wouldn’t two people talk, even if only in a whisper, if they crossed a dark parking area? She couldn’t say that this silence now sat well with her. It unsettled her actually.

Taking in a deep breath, Felicity turned back around and continued her way to the car. The steps of the others were following. Felicity didn’t hesitate to stop using her phone for light, so she could instead call Oliver. Before she even got to open her contacts, the steps behind her quickened. Felicity did the same, a sudden wave of worry causing her to walk more quickly. No matter how fast she walked, she could hear the steps coming closer, though.

Felicity knew she couldn’t call Oliver or anyone. The moment she tried, they would start running to catch up with her. Felicity couldn’t run, though. She would never be fast enough with her high heels on, and she couldn’t slip out of them because of the small ankle straps. She guessed she should change her shoes into something else in case of a possible attack in the underground parking.

Before Felicity could have made a good plan about what to do, she felt a hand at her upper arm and-

_“Keep your wrist straight.”_

_Startled by the suddenness of his voice, Felicity turned around and almost lost her balance in the process. She hadn’t known that Oliver was already back from his midnight patrol through the city. Usually, he told her before he headed home. She caught herself quickly, though, and cocked her head at Oliver._

_“What are you doing back here?”_

_Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “The city is quiet, and I’ve got rid of the excessive energy in my system. I figured I could come back here and suggest we go home.”_

_“Oh, okay,” Felicity said. “Let me just-“_

_She was already about to take off her boxing gloves, but Oliver quickly stepped forward and fastened them around her wrists again._

_“No, no,” he told her. “You gotta remember to keep your wrists straight.”_

_Oliver put his hands to her hips and turned her around, so her back was turned towards him and she was facing the punchbag. He pushed her feet into the right position with his foot and pressed himself to her back, so he could stabilize her posture. His gloved hands took hold of her wrists keeping them straight as he started leading her punches._

_“If you keep them straight,” he whispered to her ear, his stubble tickling the shell of it, “you don’t jam them. Hence, you can hit harder and more often without being in pain.”_

_After a few repetitions of him leading her movements, Oliver stepped back to give Felicity the room to try it herself. She did, following his order to keep her wrists straight. She realized that Oliver was right. If she kept her wrist straight, she did really manage to hit a harder. Oliver stayed close the entire time, leaning against a pillar and watching her._

_“I thought you don’t want to train me,” Felicity said, shooting him a brief look without stopping with the punches. “You said so very often actually.”_

_“I don’t,” Oliver said firmly. “I just think when you are trying to implement what you learned with Laurel and John, I should keep an eye on the correctness of your movements. I… am trying not to imagine any scenarios where you might need to physically defend yourself. If you are in a situation like that, I want to know that you can really hold yourself. That requires that I make sure you really are doing this right.”_

_“Will I have to hit water too?”_

_Oliver rolled his eyes, but he chuckled. “He’s been successfully in the field as Arsenal for years now. He should stop complaining about my training methods.”_

_Felicity punched the punch bag once more before she stopped and turned around to Oliver. She took off her boxing gloves and put her arms around his neck._

_“So, what did you say?” she asked. “Did I keep my wrist straight?”_

_Oliver smiled, sliding his arms around her waist and brushed his lips against hers. “A plus.”_

\- with a quick movement, Felicity turned around and punched the person right in the face as hard as she could. She was sure she heard a cracking sound as her fist had crashed against his nose. In the low light of the phone that had fallen from her hands, Felicity could see the man who had tried to attack her falling to the floor. He held his nose under the balaclava, wailing in pain.

The triumph didn’t last long, though. The moment Felicity turned around to continue the way to her car, lock herself in and call Oliver, she was punched in the face with so much force that she flew several feet backwards. She fell to the cold concrete floor, her head hitting down on it so hard she could feel her consciousness slipping away.

Felicity wondered what these guys could want from her. Was it someone from Oliver’s past who wanted revenge for God knew what like it had been the case with Slade? Was it someone who knew Oliver was the Green Arrow and wanted to blackmail him into stepping down or something like that? Was it someone who wanted insight on current developments of QI and maybe steal something? Was it-?

When Felicity’s sight was blurring more and more, she squeezed her eyes shut and groaned. The shock over the punch passed, allowing the pain to make itself feel. It pulsated under and right around her eyes, mimicking her heartbeat. Her head was spinning, too busy with processing the pain to acknowledge much of what was going on around her.

“Well, karma’s a bitch, Bitch.”

The first attacker had gotten up and now kicked his foot against her head, and everything went black.

→ → → → → 

Oliver chuckled at his daughter’s excited squealing. The laughter of his kids really was the best sound in the world. Nothing made him as happy as knowing his kids were happy.

“I know who would release less of a delighted squeal and more of a panic screech if she saw this.”

Oliver shot a brief look at Tommy, who was standing in the door to the living room with two bottles of beer. He was watching Oliver throwing Addie up in the air and catching her safely in his arms. He didn’t have to say who exactly would be less excited about this for Oliver to know who he was talking about.

“Who’s going to tell Felicity?” Oliver asked. “You?”

“No, because I am sure she will shoot the messenger,” Tommy said. “I don’t want to die yet. Those years away with my father and the League of Crazies was enough for a lifetime.”

Oliver threw Addie up in the air one more time before he held her to his chest and peppered her cheek with little kisses. As much as they loved this little game, Felicity hated it with passion. She was too worried that he might drop Addie like that was actually a possibility.

“If it calms you down,” Oliver said, “Felicity has a terrible aim.”

“I am still not out for making her angry.” Tommy handed Oliver one of the bottles, and they clinked them. “I am actually a little bit afraid of your wife.”

Oliver smiled, unable not to. He knew most people just saw a sweet, little blonde with the tendency to babble in her. Who looked a little deeper knew that she was also intelligent. Who took the time to really get to know her would sooner or later see that Felicity was dangerous. With her intelligence, her courage and her willpower to do the right thing, she was given a lot of dangerous tools.

“She’s beauty. She’s grace. She’ll punch you in the face,” Oliver said with a chuckle that did nothing to hide how much he loved Felicity. “You should be a little bit afraid of her.”

“And she has you to fight her battles.”

“Felicity doesn’t need me for that,” Oliver said. “She can very well fight her own battles.”

“I easily believe that,” Tommy said. He sat down on the couch and grabbed the remote to switch on the TV before he looked back over his shoulder at Oliver. “Where is Felicity by the way? You said she wanted to be here when the game starts, but it’s only five more minutes.”

“Yeah, I have no idea.” Oliver shot a look at his watch and frowned. “She was supposed to be here almost half an hour ago.”

“Stuck in traffic?”

Oliver knew Tommy wanted to calm him down. He could probably feel his friend’s nervousness. No matter how much he knew that Felicity could handle herself, and she wasn’t a defenseless damsel in distress, he would always be worried about her. He was also always worried about the kids. He had seen too much pain and sorrow in his life to be relaxed when he didn’t know where a part of his family was.

“She probably forgot about the game and got stuck at QI, preparing for week off.” Oliver frowned. Felicity had been looking forward to her vacation this morning, and she had told him that there wasn’t much more that she had to prepare for her leave. It was weird that she should be late now. “I gotta check my phone. Can you take her for a moment?”

“Sure.” Tommy took Addie from him and sat her down on his lap. “I am sure it’s nothing, though.”

“It probably is,” Oliver agreed. He chuckled and moved his hand through his hair. “I am a little bit paranoid when it comes to my family.”

“After everything I know you have been through and everything I have been through, I won’t judge you.” Tommy bobbed Addie up and down on his thighs, making her squeal. He smiled at her. “You will judge, but you’re cute, so that’s okay.”

Chuckling, Oliver turned around and headed to the kitchen. His phone was on the counter where he had thought it was. He walked right over to the counter and took it. His lips pressed together slightly when he saw that he didn’t have any missed calls or texts from Felicity.

“Everything alright?” Raisa asked.

Oliver lifted his gaze to where she was baking cookies with Millie and Tommy. She didn’t need to say anything else for Oliver to know that she could see the worry in his face. Raisa had known him since he had been a baby. She knew him as much as a mother knew her child.

“Felicity’s just late.”

“She is probably stuck at work or in traffic.”

“Probably,” Oliver agreed, internally rolling his eyes about himself. Raisa and Tommy were two of the people who knew him the longest. They both came up with reasonable explanations for Felicity being late. Yet, he still felt unsettled about it. “I will just call her.”

Oliver dialed Felicity’s number manually. He had all her numbers on speed dial, but he tried to dial her number himself whenever possible. He didn’t want to risk forgetting her number. One day, he wouldn’t have his phone close but needed to call her and wouldn’t remember her number.

The dialing tone resounded twice before the call was taken.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Oliver said, relief washing over him. “Tommy’s here for the game. I thought we wanted to watch it together.”

“Oh.” There was a long silence. “I forgot.”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s no problem. I was worried something might have happened to you, but that’s just my usual paranoia and-“

“I got stuck at work,” Felicity interrupted him. “I was almost on my way home when I realized I had forgotten something and-“

“It’s all fine, Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her now. “I was just thinking I could order pizza to celebrate your week off. Besides, the kids are baking cookies with Raisa, so you have something sweet too. How does that sound.”

“Great. It sounds great.” There was a moment of silence. “I am just not sure I will make it in time. I actually got something in last minute, and I really need to take care of it, or I won’t have a calm second all week.”

Oliver smiled. “That’s the woman I fell in love with and that I continue to fall in love with every day.”

Felicity was a wife and a mother, a pretty good one actually. At the same time, she was a tough business woman who had brought the company that had belonged to his parents once to more success than any of the former CEOs. He was proud of her, proud of her success and proud of how well she balanced her job with being a wife and mother. If he managed being mayor despite having a family only half as well as Felicity balanced job and family, he’d be happy.

“Still, it shouldn’t have happened,” Felicity said eventually. “I am really sorry, Ollie.”

Oliver felt his entire body tense at her words. The worry of before came back with much more force. His heart started racing, and his breathing faltered. His hand tightened around the phone tightly. He wanted to say something, but he was unable to get a single word out.

“Do you understand?”

He had to suck in a deep breath to get himself to speak calmly. “It’s okay, Hon. Don’t worry about it. I understand. See you later.”

Oliver didn’t wait for an answer and hung up. He didn’t want to waste another second. He had wasted enough time as it was, trying to calm down instead of trusting the feeling in his gut that had told him something was wrong.

“Raisa, I gotta head out once more,” Oliver said, already walking to the door. “I don’t know when I am back, but-“

“Where are you going?” Tommy asked, coming from the living room with Addie still in his arms. “Did something happen?”

Oliver pressed his lips together. He could see Millie and Tommy looking at him from the kitchen. He didn’t to scare them by letting them know that something was wrong with their mommy. He walked to his friend quickly.

“Something’s wrong with Felicity. I gotta find her.”

Tommy didn’t hesitate. He kissed Addie’s cheek and put her down on the floor, so she could crawl to Raisa.

“I am coming with you.”

→ → → → → 

“Why does this take so long?”

“I told you this is not easy,” Felicity said. “It takes time to hack servers like that, especially because they have great security.”

The second attacker, the one who had punched her, looked at her for a moment before he looked at his friend. The younger of the two guys was sitting on the leather coach and holding a cooling pad to his nose. His face was covered in dried blood that had come from his nose.

“I think she is trying to jerk us around,” the second attacker said to his friend and snorted. He pulled the gun from the back of the waistband of his pants and held it to Felicity’s temple, releasing he safety catch. “Are you trying to jerk us around?”

Felicity bit down on her tongue hard. The cold muzzle of the gun pressed to her temple, and it did nothing to soothe her terribly aching head. There was still a pulsating pain around her eye, but it was only the center of her pain. It actually radiated all over her head and made it incredibly hard to focus on anything but the pain. Her view blurred every few minutes, and her hands started shaking. Even without that, hacking the District Attorney’s computer was not easy. Felicity had installed the security on the laptop, so she could actually hack it. She always had her ways to sneak gaps to use into the programs she wrote. It wasn’t easy, though, and with the headache it was only harder.

“I am trying, okay?” she said. “But I told you it will take time.”

Enough time for Oliver to show up and come to her rescue before she would have hacked the computer Felicity added in her thoughts. She was sure that he had caught her call for help. He knew her too well. He knew that she had snuck something in to make him know that she wasn’t okay. She could just hope that he understood the urgency and was actually coming in full Green Arrow gear, preferably with some backup.

“If you are trying to play us to have more time and hope for time, I will have to disappoint you. We will shoot everyone who comes here and-“

When the glass of the wide windows suddenly shattered, Felicity quickly ducked down, hiding her face behind her hands to keep it safe from the scattered pieces flying around. She could feel the second attacker grabbing her hair, but before he got a real hold on it, he was tossed away from her. Felicity watched the Green Arrow fight the second attacker while someone in jeans and leather jacket with balaclava – was that Tommy? – fought the other guy.

Felicity tried to follow the fights, but she was unable to. Her brain refused to process the information as fast as they came in. Felicity closed her eyes and took some deep breaths, trying to calm down. The fight didn’t take too long. Within a couple of minutes, both criminals were lying on the floor, unconscious.

“First guy down,” Oliver called through the room.

“Seconds guy, too.”

When he pulled the balaclava from his head, Felicity realized that it had indeed been Tommy fighting alongside Oliver. She couldn’t exactly process that, either. At least she couldn’t process it now.

When she felt a warm hand on her thigh, she almost flinched away. She turned around at the same time to see Oliver kneeling before her, though. Immediately, she flung her arms around his neck, and Oliver got up on his feet, holding her to him tightly. Her feet were dangling several inches over the floor. She couldn’t describe the intensity of relief that washed over her at being back in Oliver’s arms. She couldn’t say if she had been scared by what had happened, but she knew that she felt a lot safer now with Oliver back by her side.

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked urgently. “Are you hurt. Are you-?”

Oliver had put his hands to her cheeks and gently angled her head back to look at her. She was sure that her eye was red or blue or whatever where the guy had punched her. She could fell her skin starting to swell around her eye actually. Oliver seemed everything but happy about the bruise. Anger was sparkling in his eyes.

“Which one of these two did that?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Felicity replied quickly. She wrapped her arms back around Oliver’s neck and let him pull her in for another hug. His hair moved through her hair soothingly. “I am just glad that you found me.”

“Of course I found you,” Oliver replied. He turned his head and kissed her head. “I will always find you.”

Felicity smiled at his words and tightened her arms around his neck. She knew he meant it and would always find her. It gave her a reassuring and safe feeling, the one only Oliver could make her feel.

When Felicity opened her eyes and saw Tommy standing around with his hands in the pockets of his jeans, she held Oliver closer for a second and then let go. Immediately, Oliver’s fingers laced through hers, keeping her from moving too far away.

“Thanks to you too, Tommy.”

“Sure.” Tommy smiled and shrugged his shoulders. “Feels good to put those abilities to better use than during my time away.”

Felicity smiled. She knew that Tommy wasn’t ready to really talk about what had happened to him. Felicity understood that. It had taken Oliver years to do so, too. He had needed to learn to trust people around him before he had been ready. He had also needed to process some things himself before he had been able to say them out loud.

“You know, the team has always a place for you if you want that permanent,” she said gently.

Tommy looked at the bow in his hand before he looked up. “Maybe one day.”

“Okay, let’s call the police and get Felicity to a hospital,” Oliver suggested. “Then we can-“

“I don’t need a hospital. All I need is-“

When Oliver squeezed her hand, Felicity turned around to look at him. He wasn’t saying anything. he just looked at her urgently, touching parts deep inside of her just by looking at her with his deep, blue eyes. She could read the worry he must have gone through since her phone call. She knew how worried she was whenever he took a hit in the field.

“Alright, just a short check-up,” she agreed, knowing it was the only way he’d calm down.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered and kissed her cheek. He lifted her hand and took a close look at it before he kissed it too and asked, “How does your hand feel?”

Felicity frowned, surprised by his question. “Huh?”

“I think you broke that guy’s nose.” Oliver nodded to the attacker Tommy had taken down. “Good job.”

Felicity smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “I just remembered to keep my wrist straight.”

Oliver brushed his lips against the corner of her lips. “Of course you would. That and your smart way to call for help saved you.”

“I am not sure if that alone was enough.”

“I am sure,” Oliver replied. He pulled her in for another hug and kissed the top of her head. “I am actually sure for the both of us.”

Felicity sighed and rested her cheek against Oliver’s chest, closing her eyes. Her head was still hurting terribly, and she was shaken from what had happened. All she wanted now was to call the police and get over with the check-up at the hospital quickly, so she could head home to her kids.

“So, you knew all of this just because she called you Ollie?” Tommy asked Oliver eventually.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Yes.”

Felicity angled her head back to look at Oliver, and he winked at her. Of course that had been enough. If she remembered correctly, they had talked about her dislike of this old nickname the morning Thea had found out about her brother’s new girlfriend. Ollie would forever be the guy who had ran from responsibilities and cheated on his girlfriend with her sister. Her Oliver was nothing like that, and it had nothing to do with Felicity not having a sister and everything with being a completely different and better person. Her Oliver was nothing like Ollie.


End file.
